You know, just read that prompt about Timmy quietly accepting his own death at Jason's command...
I kinda want the opposite.
I want a furious, yelling, fighting Tim, with a major broken pedestal as far as Jason is concerned.
Okay, he can get why Jason blames him, for taking the Robin suit. And maybe Bruce deserves a bit of it too.
But what he absolutely can't and won't forgive is Jason going after Dick. Especially since Dick forgives it so readily, since Dick is the one pleading for forgiveness.
Tim was there. He saw what Jason's death did to all of them. And he can't believe Jason would ever doubt Dick, that Jason would turn up to hurt him worse.
Tim being like... "You know, all the time I was trying to keep them from killing themselves, I kept telling myself, telling them, that you wouldn't want them to hurt like that. But you wanted it, didn't you? Want it. You never wanted them to heal. You never wanted them to move on. Maybe, if you had come back then, come back when B was trying to get himself killed, when Dick was catatonic curled up on your grave and trying to starve himself to death, maybe you'd have been happy at last? Or would you have decided that isn't enough either? Not enough punishment for not making you his absolute top priority for once, just once, in his life?"
And Tim going "I hate you. But I'll pretend to love you, because everyone knows Dick will choose you anytime. And I daren't leave him at your mercy."
I want post-Red Hood Jason working to earn Tim's forgiveness and trust again.
Oh yes, that’s also an interesting take! And one that (I think) comes closer to how he would react in canon. Tim is a spitfire and we love him for it 💚
And while I definitely want to explore this version of him eventually, I think it wouldn’t tie into how the Owl Song verse is set up.
Although if Owl Song does get its continuation, I think there would be some struggling on Tim’s part. Not for himself (never for himself) but for Dick and Bruce. A struggle to make Jason understand that nobody ever wanted to replace him.
In this universe, Tim wouldn’t be able to scrounge up the anger that would result in him hating Jason. Jason did too much for him to do that. He brought Tim into the family fold. Without Jason, Dick would have never accepted him. Jason, though it wasn’t his intention and he genuinely loved Tim, built the stepping stone that resulted in Tim becoming Robin.
Because any other kid trying to be Robin after Jason? Dick wouldn’t have stopped his mad pursuit for anything. Tim having “hatchling” status (ie family) is literally what saved him.
If you look deeper than surface level, the Owl Song verse is pretty twisted in its own way. And Dick could very quickly become a real monster if nobody keeps him grounded at least somewhat. With Jason gone and Bruce being someone Dick now borderline despises— yeah, it’s very lucky that Jason met Tim in school and went “must protect” and had Dick pick up on that. 🦉
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Okay, accent/pronunciation post.
In Hereward the Wake, Tim pronounces “duty” with a /j/ (yod) which creates a pronunciation something like /ˈdjuː.ti/ in the IPA or “dyoo-tee” in English phonetic spelling. From what I can tell, this is one of two common pronunciations in English accents, the other being /ˈdʒuː.ti/ in the IPA or “djoo-tee” in English phonetic spelling. This second pronunciation features coalescence of the d and yod to create a dj sound. This can be contrasted by Rachel’s pronunciation of “duty” in Alice, which features yod dropping, and can be written as /ˈduː.ti/ in the IPA or “doo-tee” in English phonetic spelling. Although Tim is doing a very odd accent in Hereward, it doesn’t really matter in this case. In Riddle of the Sphinx he pronounces “introduced” with a coalescence of the d and yod (/ˌɪn. trə ˈdʒuːst/ or “in-truh-djoost”) and regardless of whether it is coalesced or not, as long as it’s not *dropped* it works for our purposes.
Okay, now we get into why this is funny to me. The yod-close back rounded vowel pair (/ju/ or “yoo”) comes to English from French. The French close front rounded vowel sound (/y/, I have no idea how I’d write this in English phonetic spelling, but make the inside of your mouth like you’re gonna say “ee” and your lips like your gonna say “oo” and that’s how you make it) came into English and was separated into /i/ and /u/ (or “ee” and “oo”) but then the /i/ was replaced with yod. This was not only applied to words that came from French, but also some pre-existing English words as well (and is now applied to foreign words once they’ve been in English long enough, like “Cuba”).
Now, when did the yod-close back rounded vowel pair enter English? Well, when was English heavily influenced by French? That’s right, when the Normans took over. And who fought the Normans? Hereward!
This lead me to the idea of an Anglish translation of Hereward the Wake. Has anyone done that yet?
[Note: information on the yod-close back rounded vowel pair came from this video by Dr. Geoff Lindsey; IPA representations were taken from the online Cambridge Dictionary and Wikictionary and adjusted where necessary (such as making “introduce” into “introduced”). Also I’m not actually positive that Tim doesn’t coalesce the d and yod in “duty”, it sounds kinda like both to me, but either way it comes from the French which is the important part for this post.]
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Back at it again with a sad song to relate to these characters!!!!
This is so!!!! This is so Alex to Jay, or at least how he would want to be to him under better circumstances. Or at least that’s how I saw it.
https://youtu.be/R2zXxQHBpd8?si=-VKZo5PAshjGBfQM
Song is: will he by Joji
you're so right. This is so alex wishing he'd been able to be better to jay. (tho there's also an argument that jay also needed to be better to alex, and cos sorry its locked is all jays pov so far i haven't been able to show that he was also pretty bad for alex just like alex was bad for him. neither of them are the good guy, neither of them are purely a victim, neither of them are purely a 'villain' -can't think of the right word so villain will have to do-)
anyway, analysis thingy
I got knots all up in my chest (Up in my chest, up in my chest)
Just know, I'm trying my best (I'm trying my best)
'Cause when you look (When you look)
When you laugh (When you laugh)
When you smile (When you smile)
I'll bring you back (Bring you back)
And now I'm sad (Now I'm sad)
And I'm a mess (And I'm a mess)
And now we high (Now we high)
That's why I left (Why I left)
That's why I left (Woo)
Pretty simple, just Alex thinking about Jay and how much he really did like him. But Alex was a mess and left Jay for Amy because he didn't know how to cope with his feelings (and with some other stuff I haven't written yet, but i'm ignoring that just so this song will fit with what's already actually out there for this fic)
Will your tongue still remember the taste of my lips?
(My lips, my lips, my lips)
Will your shadow remember the swing of my hips?
(My hips, my hips, my hips)
Will your lover caress you the way that I did?
(I did, I did, I did)
Will you notice my charm if he slips up one bit?
(One bit)
Again, Alex thinking about Jay. But also, Alex realising that Tim and Jay are together now from watching the videos Jay uploads, he's watched them slowly get closer, and then one entry something changes and Alex knows that Jay has "moved on". Alex wonders whether Tim hold and kisses Jay the way he did that last night he and Jay were together, and he wonders if Jay thinks of him when Tim messes up. He calls it his 'charm' kinda sarcastically, because he's just kinda caught up in hating himself for what he had to do.
Because unlike in uni (their uni relationship was complicated, i promise I'll write it eventually, just know that Jay did some bad stuff just like Alex did), this time Alex was the only person in the wrong for hurting Jay like he did in chapter 2 of Sorry It's Locked.
'Cause I don't need to know
I just wanna make sure you're okay (Okay)
I don't need to know
I just wanna make sure you're all safe
All safe, all safe (woo)
Alex doesn't really want to know if he's left Jay with shit from everything that happened around entry 47 (in chapter 1 and 2), he doesn't want to confirm for himself that he hurt Jay so bad that he's been left with lasting emotional shit. He just wants to know that Jay's okay, that he's safe, but every entry Jay posts just confirms over and over again that Jay is not safe, every entry posted just reminds Alex that everything he did to try and drive Jay away and make him give up on finding out what's wrong with Alex and what's going on with the whole Operator thing.
Everything Alex did was for nothing. He hurt Jay for no reason, and sure, he couldn't have known it at the time, but in his little moments of clarity he realizes that he could have done something else. He could have talked to Jay, he could have asked for help, he could have explained what was going on. He didn't have to hurt him, but he did, and it didn't even achieve what he'd wanted it to. If anything, it just made everything worse because now Jay's got someone else involved.
Will he play you those songs just the way that I did?
(I did, I did, I did)
Will he play you so strong just the way that I did?
(I did) Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Will he treat you like shit just the way that I did?
(I did, I did, I did)
'Cause I don't blame you
Again, Alex thinking about their relationship, both their uni relationship and their one night stand in chapter 1. He knows Tim and Jay are together now and he can't help wondering what their relationship is like, since they keep it completely off camera except for the odd hickey just barely peeping out from under a shirt collar etc.
He can't help almost hoping that Tim treats Jay like shit, and he hates himself for it, he just wishes he could have Jay for himself but he knows he can't. Do you know what I mean. Like, he doesn't actively wish harm on Jay, and he's constantly trying to think of ways to keep Jay safe and alive, but he also can't help feeling jealous of Tim and wishing he'd treat Jay badly so that Alex could swoop in and 'save' Jay. He knows if that happened though, and Jay would shy away from him too, he wouldn't go running into Alex's arms, he'd just be angry at and scared of both of them and would probably do something stupid and get himself killed.
'Cause I don't need to know
I just want to make sure you're okay (Okay)
I don't need to know
I just want to make sure you're all safe
Same as before, in the end, Alex just wants Jay to be okay, he want's to make up for everything he's done by finding a way to make sure Jay lives, to make sure he doesn't have to kill him.
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