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spite-and-waffles · 2 years

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Trying to drag real-world ethics into the Batverse is a bad faith argument when absolutely nothing in the Batverse has any ethical or moral standing in the real world.

Real world evils that claim death tolls:

- billionaires

- cops

- vigilanteism

- copaganda (crime-fighting as a genre is libertarian copaganda)

- prison industrial complex

- war on drugs

- child soldiers

- policing entities without democratic or civic transparency or oversight

- finding acceptable targets for your personal trauma and visiting what you believe is justified violence on them

But all of that is fine and good and acceptable as conceits of the universe, EXCEPT the question of "should this rich white guy who appoints himself the protector of the innocent due to the failures of the legal system, actually do something about this guy who keeps killing because of the failure of the legal system?" THAT is somehow above challenge or question. Never mind that turning the concept of "legal incompetence", meant to protect the most vulnerable population in a society, into a loophole for fictional mass murderers is violent ableism and copaganda. Forget taking a deep dive into why exactly killing is bad, or how far a value system can go before it becomes self-serving, or storytelling imperatives or any of that. The only reason any of us could ever take Jason's side (re: the Joker) is that we, in real-life, think that "bad guys should die". Instead of the fact that because nothing works as it should in the Batverse, the Joker's continued existence actively cheapens any moral code that allows it.

You can take whatever side you want to, but get off that horse and actually engage with the question, or fuck off with the dudebros who think "killing a serial killer makes you as bad as a serial killer" has any actual ethical basis.

#i'm so fucking done with this grandstanding and moralizing #jason and bruce are both moral absolutists driven entirely by personal trauma #and yes jason is a bad guy. i like him as a bad or morally grey guy #but it drives me nuts that y'all can't see how bruce is very far from being a 'good' guy #he doesnt kill anyone even the joker not because he considers joker's life sacred #but because he's afraid he'll snap and start killing everyone else #this is not the behaviour of a stable and noble man #if you're so close to the edge that having to kill for any reason will send you on a killing spree #then you're fundamentally unfit for your chosen vocation #jiminy jesus christ #also? a child deserves a parent who will kill to protect or avenge them #if someone took my baby from me and they kept getting out and killing other people's babies #that guy would be dead and I'd be in jail #and it would be worth it #the lowest possible bar for loving a child #but then he fails his kids in every other way too so why not this one #anti bruce wayne #jason todd #bat meta #fandom wank #spite waffle

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gummy-axolotl · 2 months

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:333 I wasn’t lying when I said Jax liked bondage

Cube. Cube honey. Bestie. Darling. I. Am so normal. About this. I am completely chill and not dying. I am vibing. All good. Nothing. Yes.

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tiktoksinspo · 2 years

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#omg #wtf #the more you know #pinocchio #original story #jesus christ #jiminy cricket #damn #acting #oh #gepetto #blue fairy #there's a lot to unpack here #tiktok #tiktoks #@mackenziebarmen

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tomwaterbabies · 2 years

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i watched the house of mouse episode that's pinocchio-centric and jkdfhdfkghdfjkgd HEY??? why did they lowkey imply jiminy cricket abuses pinocchio and then not address that further???? HELLO?????

#WHAT DA HELL WAS THAT #dont get me wrong its an an enjoyable episode and pretty funny and oh my god pinocchio is sooooooo cute in it #but jesus christ. jiminy??? SIR?????#text #disney

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nervouspeacepolice · 1 year

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lex-feldz · 2 years

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Bro what the fuck is this new Pinocchio??? Disgusting. Tom Hanks as Geppetto?? Gross. Joseph Gordon Levitt as Jim cricket, get that shit out of my face

#gross #get this shit out of my face #jiminy cricket #the new Pinocchio #disgusting #the blue fairy being a poc is the only redeeming factor here #maybe the cat too #but Jesus fucking Christ

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misforgotten2 · 1 month

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After all these years it just came to me that “Jiminy Cricket” represents “Jesus Christ”. No wonder he’s so annoying.

Parents Magazine - October 1945

#1945 #disney #pinocchio #vintage ads #vintage ad #advertising #advertisement #1940s #1940s ad #1940's #1940's ad #funny #humor #humour

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gimmethatagustd · 2 months

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Jai my beloved, I know you were joking about the collab and since I haven’t written anything in so long I wouldn’t even take that kind of challenge BUT just think about beetlejuice!JK crack fic, in which he’s been cursed to only ever appear to wreak havoc upon mortals when he’s being addressed as „kookoo san” and Jiminie just casually teasing him and testing his patience. That’s all. Jesus Christ on a bike, I need some sleep.

i cannot fully express to you how fucking funny i find this. i'm trying to be quiet cuz my partner is asleep in the other room and my chest hurts from keeping my laughter inside jhskjfks

kookoo san SENT ME

but WAS I JOKING i think i wasn't. i think that a crack fic is a great way to get back into writing 🤭

#jai asks #Anonymous

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eddiessweetheart86 · 1 year

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Waiting for a Girl Like You

Summary: You (AFAB/She/Her pronouns) meet Eddie Munson at a college party and hit it off

Warnings: Unprotected P in V sex (PLEASE BE SAFE!!), language, physical fighting (brief), drugs (weed), smoking (weed and cigarettes) Let me know if I missed anything:)

Just a short story that came to me while I was at work lol

I hope you enjoy! I will be working on a part 2!

You are at a college party during Thanksgiving break 1985. It is quite lackluster, just people drinking and being idiots, but that’s parties for you. Somehow many high school students infiltrated, so you were being stalked by horny teenage boys that you had no interest in considering you’re 20 years old and have standards.

You told Steve that you need to go get some air and wave a cigarette in his face, you give him a smile with your tongue out and made your way through the rowdy crowd of people.

Outside in the backyard there were only about ten people, some sitting and talking on the grass and others making out on picnic blankets or lettermen jackets.

You light your cigarette and walk to the side of the frat house so your view isn’t a live porno movie and see someone lying on their back on the ground. You rush to them, landing roughly on your knees.

You put out the cigarette on the bottom of your boot and let your arms hover over the unconscious boy’s shoulders, debating if you should shake him.

His hair was curly and long, loose bangs on his forehead. His skin was pale, very pale and his mouth was slightly open.

He overdosed, oh shit! Goddamn jiminy fuckface! you thought. You put two fingers to his neck to check for a pulse.

Then he opens his eyes and screams in terror directly in your face, causing you to shriek and fall back onto your butt, catching yourself with your elbows.

“What the fuck!” you yell “I thought you were dead!”

“No!” He says as if he answered a stupid question

“You looked pale! Like— like some dying Victorian child!”

“I’m just white!”

“Jesus Christ! You bag of— bitch!” you say and grab another cigarette from your skirt pocket.

The boy laughs at your distressed demeanor.

“So funny, right! I love scaring innocent women too!” You say sarcastically

“This is just really good shit” He says reaching for a cigarette case next to his torso.

“Looks like it” You say annoyed. You’re still trying to compose yourself, shaking so bad that you can’t light your cigarette.

The boy grabs your lighter and lights it for you, making tense eye contact as he does it. His eyes sparkle in the moonlight and the temporary flash from the lighter makes them look more seductive. You take a puff and exhale out of the side of your mouth, away from his face.

“Shit, where are my manners?” He says extending his hand “I’m Eddie. Munson. If you already know me… no you don’t”

You laugh at his comment and also because he wants to shake hands. Who does that anymore?

You take his hand and shake “Okay Mr. President” you joke “I’m Y/N”

“Oh please, Mister President is my father” he says and waves his hand like a debutante

You both laugh, not breaking eye contact. You bite the inside of your cheek and then finally say “Can I have some?”, motioning to his cigarette case.

You both lie on the grass, he puts his red flannel under your head so your hair does not get grass or leaves in it. You pass the freshly lit joint, talking about topics ranging from music to movies to astrophysics, which he knows a lot about. After only talking to this boy for 10 minutes you were already a goner. He’s so funny and smart and witty and absolutely gorgeous.

You talk about how annoying high school horn-dogs are and how one named Andy has been trying to get in your pants for months.

“Andy such an asshole. All of them are. Especially Jason, he’s not here, thank fuck”

“Jason? I don’t think I’ve ever met him. How do you know him?”

“We… go to school together”

You sit up quickly “What? You said you’re turning 20 next week?”

“Yeah” He says with an embarrassed tone

“So you’re a 20 year old senior? In high school?”

“Well when you say it like that it makes it sound like… the truth” He mumbles sadly

“No, I don’t mean it in a rude way… it’s just that… you’re really smart. Like, you just explained Hawking Radiation to me while high. To be honest, it sounded like you were speaking the same language that the adults in Charlie Brown speak… but it was hot” you blush

Eddie, still lying down on his back, blushes too, not that you can see, but you can tell, you can feel that he is.

“It’s interesting stuff. And I just can’t focus too well in school. Plus, the teachers hate me and treat me like shit, so why go?”

“Eddie… you can’t keep failing. You need to pass this year. You know what, let me tutor you! I was a straight A student”

Eddie chuckles “Sweetheart, I won’t be able to focus if you were my tit— tutor”

You playfully push his shoulder

Eddie sits up, leaning back on his palms “You’re really beautiful” he says dreamily

“So are you” You say looking nervously fiddling with the black fabric of your skirt

“Can I… kiss you?” He asks

“It’s ‘may I’ Mr. Munson” you joke and lean into him.

He puts one hand on the back on your head and the other lightly on your waist. You have one hand on his thigh and the other on his chest. You slowly lean him back and throw your leg around him so you’re straddling him. The whole time you do not break away from each other. He hold your waist and grinds you into his clothed erection, which you can feel through your panties.

You pull away from him and slip your panties off. Then you unbuckle his belt, pull down his pants a little and reveal his huge, curved dick.

You go back up to his face and kiss his neck, making your way up to his lips. As you do this you’re stroking his cock, gently touching it to your entrance.

Since the second you lied down next to him you’ve been soaking wet, this is what you’ve been waiting for.

Eddie slides in, slowly, inch by inch, and there are a lot inches. You both moan into each other’s mouths the deeper he goes.

When he is seated all the way inside you, you sit up and lean back, arching your back and putting your hands on his thighs. You begin to roll your hips on his, letting out a soft moan with each thrust. You’ve never felt so much emotion during sex, you wanted to see him come inside you. You wanted to make him feel good and if you didn’t climax you would honestly not care.

Eddie’s hands are up your shirt, squeezing your tits.

Eddie is so close to finishing but he doesn’t want you to think he’s just another amateur high school boy.

“Fuck… Eddie, I’m close” You moan as you bounce on his cock

Now that you said that there is no going back for Eddie Munson

“Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck, Y/N I’m—“

“Yes! Cum in me! Yes!” You squeal

Eddie groans, finishing inside you. You follow with a few deep thrusts, your orgasm erupts from your pelvis then your thighs and throughout your whole body. When you finally finish you stop moving and fall onto his chest, both catching your breath.

“I’m sorry… that was… so quick” he says

“No! It was incredible! Fuck it was incredible!” You say with a big grin

Eddie smiles and gives you a quick kiss on your lips. You roll off of him and onto the grass, he tucks himself back into his underwear and pants as you put your panties back on

“Are you… do you wanna clean up?” He asks

“No” you smirk “I wanna walk around with your cum inside me for the rest of the night” you plant a huge kiss on his lips

“Fuck, sweetheart” he says slapping his hand to his heart

You go back to the party and Steve is making out with some girl so you continue the rest of the night talking to Eddie.

“Hey, he bothering you?” Andy asks you, pointing at Eddie. You can see Chance and the rest of the goons laughing and watching from the kitchen

You rolls your eyes and open your mouth to tell him to leave you alone but Eddie beats you to it

“Fuck off, Andy” Eddie says

“Woah! I wasn’t talking to you freak” he spits

“Andy! Can you leave me the fuck alone! I’m not gonna sleep with you!” You yell

He stares at you, eyes angry, and then turns to Eddie “Hey man, sorry. She may look like a whore but those legs are closed tighter than—“

Before you can even react Andy is on the floor and Eddie grabs your hand and runs off.

You run out the door out, passing Steve on the way out, and run down the street to his van. He opens the drivers door and ushers you in. You crawl into the passenger seat and he starts the car. He’s fast at making a getaway.

Andy and Chance are just standing on the porch, not even running towards the van.

You and Eddie flip your middle fingers up and smile, then he swiftly drives away, both of you laughing like maniacs after a heist.

The next morning you wake up to your phone ringing. Eddie is next to you in your bed.

You reach over Eddie and say a groggily “Hello?”

“Hey did you get home safely?” Steve asks on the other end

“Obviously”

“Okay, fuck my kindness then”

You laugh “I’m fine, Steve. You?”

“I’m good. So… is the long-haired delinquent in the room with us right now?”

“Bye Steve” You say and hang up as he laughs at himself

Eddie groans when you lean back over him to put the phone back

“Hey Eddie” you whisper and shake him awake

“Yeah” Eddie croaks

“You have to go home. My mom would freak if she sees I brought a guy home”

Eddie rushes to put his clothes on and then goes out the window

“When can I see you again?” He asks

“I’ll see. Here” You grab a pen and write your phone number on his hand “This is my dorm room phone. I’ll be there tonight”

“Maybe we can meet up?” Eddie suggests

“We’ll see. They’re kinda strict about non-students being in the buildings” you kiss him on the lips and pull away to look into his deep brown eyes “See you later, Mr. Munson”

“See ya later” He says and runs off to his van

He gets into his van and speeds away. On the way home he can feel his heart in his throat as he thinks of you, and he can’t help but smile. “Waiting for a Girl Like You” by Foreigner comes on the radio, but instead of switching it off, as he usually does, Eddie blasts it and screams along to the few lyrics he knows.

Eddie Munson is hopelessly in love. And the best part is that he’s not scared.

You go into the bathroom and draw yourself a bath, even though you already took a shower last night after coming home, you just want to relax and think about Eddie and your possible future as boyfriend and girlfriend.

The next day Eddie swings open the doors to the drama club room, where they hold their DnD campaigns. He’s smiling like an idiot as Mike, Dustin, Gareth and Jeff stare at him.

“Mike and gentlemen!” He says putting on foot on his throne like a nobleman about to get his portrait drawn “I… did it!”

The room is silent

“Liar!” Gareth yells

“Throw tomatoes at him!” Mike yells

Jeff pulls a whole tomato out of his lunchbox, but Mike, very confused, stops him from throwing it.

“I’m not lying, dickwads. You’re looking at a man now. I have officially lost my virginity and I feel… relaxed”

Jeff tilts his head and squints, practically having a staring contest with Eddie.

“He’s telling the truth” Jeff says assuringly

The whole room erupts in cheers and Gareth puts his arm around Eddie and shakes him around

“Who is she?” Dustin asks

“You wouldn’t know her. She’s in college” He says with a smug tone, he leans forward and whispers “And she’s… filthy”

The boys laugh

Eddie leans over the Gareth and whispers to him about you walking around with his cum in your panties, causing Gareth’s eyes to nearly bulge out of his head and his jaw to go slack.

“What?” Jeff yells. Eddie turns to Jeff and whispers the same thing, getting the same reaction.

“Hey tell us!” Dustin says motioning between him and Mike

“No way! It’s too dirty for your child brains”

“We’re 14” Mike says

“Exactly” Eddie retorts

“Oh come on! I wanna know!” Dustin says

“No, it’s so bad!” Jeff says laughing and poking Gareth

“Yeah, if I had a wife and she did that…” Gareth says letting out a quick exhale to emphasize his over-exaggerated shock “She can put a leash on me too if she wants”

Jeff, Eddie and Gareth burst into laughter

“Tell us!” Mike begs

“Okay, okay! Let’s just say I finished the race but she kept the prize… in her panties… all night”

“Oh my god!” Dustin and Mike both say in unison and in disgust

Dustin rubs his eyes, as if it’ll reset his brain.

“Dude! That’s disgusting!” Mike says

“Disgusting? Or amazing?” Jeff asks

“Disgusting!” Dustin yells “He said disgusting!”

Meanwhile, you’re sitting on the couch, suitcase in hand, rolling it back and forth mindlessly because your mom is demanding that you wait for your brother to get home so you could say your goodbyes.

The front door opens quickly and in walks your kid brother.

“Dusty! Your sister is about to leave, give her a hug!” Your mom says

“Mom she lives like 10 minutes away” Dustin groans

“10 minutes too far!” She says hugging you tightly and squeezing your cheeks like your a baby

She pulls away and you pull your suitcase with you towards Dustin

“Bye, stupid” you say

“Y/N!” your mom says as she makes her way to grab the camera

“Sorry. Bye Dustin” you pat his shoulder and walk past him

“Bye, Y/N. Make good choices.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You ask softly

“I heard a boy in your room last night, Mary Magdalene” Dustin responds slyly

“No you didn’t” you say through gritted teeth

“Smile!” Your mom says running back in

You and Dustin put on half-ass smiles and your mom snaps the photo

“Mom, the cat!” You say pointing to Tews who is lying adorably on his back. She squeals when she sees him. You flip Dustin off and he does the same while your mom is turned around taking a picture of the cat

“Mom! Dustin flipped me off!” You yell, quickly putting your finger down

“Dustin!” She whips back around

“Bye mom!” You yell and walk out the door

“Bye sweetie!” She waves “Dustin don’t ever—“

The last thing you hear before closing the door is Dustin fighting for his life.

#stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader #steve harrington

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drsilverfish · 1 year

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What are the Akrida Doing in the Supernatural Universe?

Image credit: http://www.supernaturalwiki.com/Akrida

OK so they’re sending out a bat-signal to draw rare monsters to Lawrence, Kansas. And they’re injecting their stingers into some people’s brains to try and control them. They want to conquer earth and destroy its inhabitants. They have been fought back before by the Men of Letters.

One thing we know for sure, is that monsters in the Supernatural universe often have a symbolic function which illuminates an element of the emotional world, the inner struggles of the protagonists, and/or a larger theme.

I’ve already discussed some of what the 1x01 SPNWin Pilot reference to Vonnegut’s Slaughterhouse Five (a tale also involving aliens) means for The Winchesters narrative (a signal to look out for unreliable narrators, to, like the aliens in that novel, the Tralfamadorians, understand time as non-linear and death to have no dominion).

Slaughterhouse Five is also a metanarrative (a story which comments on its own storytelling conventions) and a touch-stone within the Supernatural text, as both Chuck-the-author (also God) and Dean, are Vonnegut fans.

So do the Akrida (like The Empty in Supernatural) represent the soul-sucking, mind-controlling TV Network, fought bravely by the writers’ room - The Men of Letters being the stand-in for the writers’ room here? Perhaps - the story needs to unfold further to follow that thread.

Akrida means “cricket” in Greek.

“Crickets” is an expression we use to mean “incoherent nothing” when we are hoping for a response, for a speech-act. So a part of me wonders whether this is a sly reference from Robbie T to the fact that Supernatural ended with huge “crickets”, namely, Dean’s silence in the face of Castiel’s romantic declaration, “I love you” (although, of course, not in the Latin American “rogue” dub).

Is The Winchesters, on some fundametal level, about speaking the unspoken? I’ve discussed whether it is designed to be a reparative text, a healing text to counter-balance the traumatic text of Supernatural. Certainly, the theme of 1x05 Legend of a Mind has both young John and young Mary speak truths which it would have been very healing for young Dean to hear (that being inducted into the hunter lifestyle as a very young child is not OK, that, by contrast, it is OK to be scared).

I can’t help thinking about Jiminy Cricket in Pinocchio, Jiminy Cricket is the narrator (and conscience) of that story. “Jiminy Cricket” has also been used as a non-blasphemous version of the swear-expression “Jesus Christ!”, In the case of The Winchesters, Dean is the narrator (he has taken the place filled by Chuck-the-God-author in Supernatural after defeating him) so that puts Dean in The Winchesters in the position of being the Cricket-Conscience of the story and a Christ-like figure, which is very in-keeping with the long history of Christ-like imagery in Supernatural, and, of course, like Christ, Dean did die, after saving the world.

Pinocchio is a morality tale, about a puppet who faces many obstacles to become a real boy. Kinda like Castiel, who broke his obedience conditioning as God’s puppet to pursue free will for love (the twin essences of what it means to be human). Again, The Winchesters narrative needs to unfold further, to see if this theme has (insectoid) legs.

The Akrida also have something of Invasion of the Body Snatchers about them (another extra-terrestrial invasion narrative) as Rockin’ Roxy is, apparently the Akrida leader, inhabiting the body of a red-headed human femme fatale, and drawing people to her by playing bangin’ tunes on pirate radio:

The various iterations of Invasion of The Body Snatchers have been read as political allegories, see here for more on that:

https://movieweb.com/invasion-of-the-body-snatchers-allegory/

The fact that the Akrida can possess people brings back the theme of possession as the negation of free will which played such a prominent part in Supernatural.

Plenty to mull on before we welcome the next installment of Robbie Thompsons’ “our new insectoid overlords”.

#Supernatural #The Winchesters meta #The Akrida #Monster metaphors #Vonnegut #Robbie Thompson #Invasion of the Body Snatchers #Pinocchio #Crickets #Jiminy Cricket #SPNWin

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