#like i mean i have memories of transgenderism

[atypi-cals]

Unpopular Opinion: I don't like people using AGAB terminology for me. (I do not have an AGAB. I was AGAB, as in, I was assigned a gender at birth. Once. 20+ years ago. It's not an ongoing thing.)

Niche pet-peeve related to the unpopular opinion: When people say our alters have an AGAB. (The only part of us that was born was the body how the fuck can we have AGAB)

#like i mean i have memories of transgenderism #i know my sources assigned birth gender. but if you call me AFAB i will bite. #Call me a trans man. Call me a dude. Hell‚ call me a dude that used to be a girl. Thats less offensive to me! Even if I was never a girl. #Because calling me 'Assigned female at birth' is inescapable. Its a reminder that theres still a female perception i guess #Ive never perceived my body OR our (the) body as female #also when people call things male or female anatomy. Like there ARE terms for those things that dont require gendering them #and of course theres the whole conversation about the disservice gendering body parts does to intersex ppl #thramin.exe

[bumblee-stumblee]

I am one of those 'kids who can't consent'. I can consent. But because of radfems allying with the conservative right, you are forcing me through irreparable changes. Every day I wake up and my body is more and more disgusting. But, because of you, I keep getting gaslit by GPs that I'm not trans, that I will learn to love my body, when the reality is it's wrong. Radfems do want to kill trans people, and they want kids to stay sexually available to them. I've lost count of the amount of lesbians telling me that I shouldn't "mutilate" my body because they lose out on another butch. You're disgusting and why I may be attracted to girls but will never date them.

Killing trans people is your end goal and that's why people think you're evil. 56% increase in hate crimes in the UK, thanks for that.

No, actually, you can't consent and if you don't understand the dangerous precedent this sets (for full grown adults with agendas to tell you can consent,) I'll explain it to you.

Within the trans community there's an idea that the sooner you can get a kid to transition, socially or medically, the sooner this can be seen as normal. The normalization of transitioning children is important, it pushes the idea that they could be born in the wrong body and normalizes the idea that a child knows what is medically best for them.

Child predators will try to find a way to have access to children by any means, now imagine how much easier it would be for them to have access to vulnerable children if they just claim to understand and support their gender identity issues.

The idea that children can consent would mean parents have no right over their children when it comes to their health and protections. I'm not saying children shouldn't speak up for themselves but we need to acknowledge that many children can be coached or groomed into saying or thinking things that may not benefit them or their safety.

The people that would love it for the law to 'recognize' that kids can consent doesn't stop at transgender rights advocates. It extends to pedophiles/child molesters that would love to get off the sex registry(something Jacob Breslow thinks it shouldn't exist to begin with) & pedophiles in position of power; informing and creating guidelines regarding childrens health & gender identity issues/transgenderism.

Pedophile sympathizer Jacob Breslow advocates for the rights of pedophiles, he thinks people are too mean to them. He thinks minors can consent too.

In his book Ambivalent Childhoods, Chapter 3 Desiring the Child: Queerness, Motherhood, and the Analyst, he writes:

[a description of a 12-year-old child dancing and mimicking sex acts to a crowd of adults.]

“As his movements transition from those that mimic break-dancers to those that mimic sex acts, repeating the easily citational gesticulations of pelvic thrusts … I find myself caught up in exhilarating waves of memory, identification, and desire … a desire for him himself,”

Why am I talking about Jacob Breslow? You should know him right? He was a Mermaids charity trustee until all of this came out, the pedophile sympathizing and all that.

Breslow also cited as an inspiration for his own writing Judith Levine’s 2002 book Harmful To Minors: The Perils Of Protecting Children From Sex in which she wrote that “sex is not in itself harmful to minors” and argued for the lowering of the age of consent to twelve.

He also was a guest speaker for a Pro-Pedophile B4U-ACT conference, an organization set up by a convicted child molester to destigmatize pedophiles and rebrand then as MAPs or Minor attracted person.

He's just one person tho, right? Not like there are more pedophile sympathizers in position of power when it comes to the transgender movement-

Anyways, all that to say;

Kids cannot consent because they don't have the cognitive or emotional maturity to understand long-term ramifications of such things.

>forcing irreparable changes

Going through puberty is normal. You've been convinced it's not but i promise you, you can still transition as soon as you turn 18 or whatever if that's what you want and you'll be fine.

Radfems don't align themselves with the conservative right but i can understand how you'd come to think that's what's happening when certain radfems talk on conservative platforms. I think there's a lack of understanding that they have no where else to speak on, especially when leftist first action is to label them as terfs and often don't give them the opportunity to have a conversation lest they be cancelled for even giving them the time of day.

Your body isn't disgusting. I'm sorry you feel that way and I'm sorry there are certain people that have convinced you to hate your body. I won't tell you you can learn to love yourself, it's taken me decades to learn to love myself and stop hating myself so much for things that happened to me that were out of my control and made me resent being a woman. Learning about radical feminism has definitely helped. I hope you can find something that will help you you as well that won't cause irreversible damage.

Radfems don't want to kill transpeople, I've already explained this in a different ask. Radfems don't want kids to be sexually available to them either, that's disgusting.

Hey, it sounds like you're dealing with a lot, including internalized homophobia, maybe some trauma. I truly hope you get an actual therapist that can listen and validate your concerns. My end goal isn't to kill transpeople tho I'd definitely would like to know where you're getting that from.

#radfem #radblr #ask

[tea-earl-grey]

okok. i've collected some of my Star Beast thoughts. i'll put in a cut because spoilers

i had so much fun but it's still a bit of a mixed bag for me.

i loved seeing David Tennant and Catherine Tate back. say what you will about nostalgia baiting but like. they're great together and will always lift up an episode. i loved how unabashedly earnest it was. i love having Shirley keep a rocket launcher in her wheelchair. i love how much Rose being transgender is brought up and informs her character (especially in the era where a canon trans character usually means there's like a throwaway line and then is never brought up again). i loooooooved Beep the Meep and the combination of practical and digital effects (the episode in general just looked very nice). i think all of the characters were really thought through, especially Donna and Sylvia (and their relationship). Donna didn't have a supportive mum growing up so she is really trying to be there for Rose even when she doesn't know how. Sylvia took the Doctor's advice to heart at the end of Journey's End and is actively trying to show Donna that she cares and loves her (and loves Rose for that matter). i did think the plot itself was surprisingly well managed? which i was very much expecting a Power of the Doctor style "who fucking knows what the plot is, we're having fun" thing but it is structured and linear and well paced.

in terms of the things i wasn't super pleased about... i love the trans and disabled rep and it was clearly done with good intentions and i didn't think there were any parts that were offensive or muddled but it was very clear that a cis man wrote it. saving the world through the power of transgenderism is fucking great and baller in the current climate but it was just a bit too pristine with the continued assumption that the Fourteenth Doctor is a man because he's played by a cis man and Thirteen was a woman because she was played by a cis woman rather than having a bit more fun with messing around with gender.

i also think Donna getting her memories back was just a bit underplayed... i love the tragedy in Journey's End and i am fine giving Donna back her memories but i wish we saw a bit more anger with how the Doctor violated her own wishes to save her life and i wish there would have been some sort of trade-off to Donna remembering to still maintain the tragedy (and there might be! this is only episode one!)

finally... i went into this episode kind of expecting it would be a lot of RTD era stuff and that it wouldn't be a huge story. they've practically said in interviews that part 1 will be an ordinary story and then parts 2 and 3 will get fun and funky but i am still a bit disappointed that this is part of the anniversary special. which is an excuse to get cringe and nostalgic and fan-servicey and they didn't really do that. and there wasn't even much of a plot twist since if you know the comics, you know Beep the Meep is evil and Rose being part of the metacrisis was a pretty popular fan theory.

anyways. that's about all of my thoughts. i had a lot of fun, i think it's a solid episode, and the things i didn't like can probably be fixed in the next two episodes. all in all 8/10

#dw spoilers #the star beast #doctor who #new who #i'm probably forgetting more things #but god knows this is all my brain holds now #i was very meh about the sonic. STOP OVERPOWERING THE SONIC

[officialgleamstar]

Linc headcanons? 😇🧸💤🫂 (no pressure to answer for all of them 🥰)

headcanon ask game

LINC <333

😇 A headcanon about their religion/lack thereof

GOOD QUESTION FOR ME BECAUSE LINC LITERALLY CANONICALLY HAS MY EXACT RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE GJFDBHJGBDFJ (raised going to unitarian church specifically because one parent had such an intense catholic upbringing, but was still baptized at his grandparents insistence) in general, i think linc has a very hands off relationship with religion. hes not really interested. but he does own a rosary that means a lot to him, because his grandparents gave it to him, and he has it hanging in his room

🧸 A headcanon about their childhood

he had fortnite characters painted on his wall as a kid bgjhbhjbjh not because he particularly wanted them, but because grant associated fortnite with his childhood and therefore just thought that was a normal kid thing to have on the walls

💤 A headcanon about their sleep

has on-and-off insomnia and when he doesnt have insomnia, he gets pretty bad nightmares :') he thinks this is completely normal and just tends to shrug them off, but its one of the reasons why he likes coffee (beans) so much, he doesnt sleep very well

🫂 A friendship headcanon

when they were very little kids and still allowed to have like play dates bhjdbhjbj normal and linc used to really like playing house! neither of them really mention it, but their current state of being ambiguously married does remind both of them a lot of their vague memories of it (also. if im sticking with my trans normal headcanon which i always am. linc had very little understanding of heterosexual marriage as a baby and whenever normal went "okay, so we're married," linc replied with "no, boys can only marry other boys". normal, despite knowing thats not true, would always responded with "okay, ill be your husband then!" so he could 'pretend to be a boy'. the early transgenderisms.)

#ask #isadora greenhall #dndads

[peppermintpekoe]

im glad you seem to enjoy my poem so much <3 like i think you just made my day way better!

id love to hear like your thoughts about it like what is in there that made you rebog that 30 times??

IT'S SO GOOD i had to reblog it 30 times for the soul ok

seriously though, i loved it so much because that's exactly what butch means to me. it's almost synonymous with caretaker, it's about love, it's about saving spiders from the classroom.

growing up (and still, though less so) i was the mediator between my friends and parents and brothers. i kept fights to a minimum, i calmed people down, let them cry on me from the age i knew how to wipe away tears. i half raised my brothers. i raised my mom almost as much as she did me. my dad wasn't home most of the time.

i've been masc since i was 8 years old. i got my first "boy haircut" at that age and it hasn't been past my shoulders since. even without the transgenderism, masculinity is such a huge part of my identity and it's ingrained in every memory i have. a good portion of the bullying and exclusion i experienced was about not being fem enough. my parents are overjoyed in an almost offensive way when i do anything they deem feminine. i get more compliments when i wear a dress, when my hair is longer, when i wear sparkly earrings or paint my nails or use a higher voice. none of these things are exclusively feminine, but they're seen as such by so many people. i don't get compliments for being masc.

butchness is so much more than masculinity. it's part of me, it's who i am, and it's more than significant to my gender. being butch, to me, is being a shoulder to cry on and arms made to hold. it's like that 'interview transcribed from my mind' poem. yknow.

that one. yeah. that interview and your poem hit so hard for me because that's *what butch is* okay i can't. say it any other way. it's bridging the gap, taking care of people on both sides of the vicious fight, it's hugs and hand holding and wiping away tears and cooking for your brothers because your mom doesn't want to that night and sneaking into his room after a fight and holding him and letting him cry on you. and then once he's asleep it's doing the same for her. that's it. yeah.

#butch #poetry #sorryyyy loredump #it's. so #yeah #i know this post is a little disjointed and weird but #yeah ..

[waitformethistime]

The Star Beast review

I remember RTD getting announced to return and the fandom acting like he "saved" the show. Now mind you, I didn't love Chibnall's era (and had my complaints about Moffat too) but to act as if RTD was the sacred cow was just irritating.

That being said, lets get into his second debut.

We start with Ten- sorry I mean Fourteen running into Donna. Now Donna was always a favorite of mine so I'm relieved to see shes in top form here. She immediately roasts Fourteen upon seeing him (with a wink and a nod to Tennant no longer being 35 years old) and that's very On Brand for her.

Then we get [sigh] Rose. No, not Billie Piper. Rose Noble. Donna's 15 year old daughter. For starters, her age makes no sense. How can she be 15 if Donna only lost her memory 15 years ago? Did she get hitched and pregnant the very next day? You could hand wave this by saying shes a stepdaughter, but no. RTD wants to make it clear she is Donna's daughter. Her trans daughter to be exact. So let's get into that.

I love that shes trans and that shes played by an actual trans actress. The representation has been long overdue. I love that Donna is such a good and accepting mum and that even Sylvia (a character I previously didnt care for) redeems herself by being a good grandma to Rose, even if she slips up sometimes. Shes trying, which is more than she ever did for Donna.

That being said, Rose is little more than a plot device. Her only real purpose is to introduce our alien, the Meep, and then save the Doctor and Donna with her magical transgenderism (I'll get to that in a second), which is a shame because Yasmin Finney is lovely.

Now let's get into the metacrisis. I always thought this plotline was stupid and the way its resolved is even stupider. Turns out Donna won't actually die if she remembers The Doctor (duh!) because she transferred some of her "Doctor-ness" to Rose...somehow. Now I couldn't tell if RTD was saying that Rose was trans because of the metacrisis energy or if the reason the metacrisis didnt affect her is because shes trans, but either way, it didnt make much sense. How is she able to "remember" things that happened before she was even born? It was convoluted and reminded me a lot of River Songs origins in a bad way. Convoluted is Moffats thing. I don't need it from RTD too.

But wait it gets better. We still have to figure out what to do with the metacrisis energy right? So how do they get rid of it? They simply just "let it go" with their womanly superiority (no really). We get this corny exchange about how 14 is "Male-presenting" and therefore doesn't know how to let things go because of it. Excuse me what? Did RTD watch any of 13's era at all? She was an emotional trainwreck. Callous, dishonest, passive-aggressive and quite vengeful too. And she was a woman. You wanna know who was the Doctor that had to let things go? Literally his last line is "I let you go"? The one who had to let go of his companion because he was hurting both of them? The one who learned to forgive, not just the Master, but also Davros, of all people? It was 12, the old white guy. Swing and a miss, RTD. That was a corniness I would expect from his first era, with Jesus!Ten. I expected some kind of growth since then. I also just felt like I was being lectured and I got quite enough of that from the last era, thank you very much.

This sounds negative so far, so let's look at the positives!

Tennant + Tate are incredible together as usual. I like that 14 is more emotionally honest than any of his previous predecessors (and 13 was getting there at the end so it's a natural progression imo). Love the alien designs. The Meep is so cute. I saw the twist of it being evil a mile away, but it's cute so I'll let it slide. The Wrarth are also cool. Just dudes in suits as Doctor Who aliens should be lol.

Didn't appreciate the Donna death fakeout because I knew RTD wouldnt actually go through with it and it felt cheap, but the acting in the scene was top-notch.

The new opening is cool and I love the new Tardis. You can tell that's where all the budget went lol. It's like a beautiful mix of 11, 12, and the Classics and it looks huge. You can tell Tennant was having a blast with it.

The Doctor actually took the initiative to not regenerate in the tardis this time and it still gets blown up. Poor tardis...

Some other thoughts:

since when can the Sonic create forcefields? I don't care for that. And 14's non-reaction was weird. Shouldn't he be surprised his tool got an upgrade? Also the fact that his clothes regenerated too with no explanation is dumb. Were they too afraid to put Tennant in Whittaker's clothes? It's not like she was wearing a handmaiden dress.

Also they kept asking "why this face?" Which is valid but my theory for why the regeneration went all wonky in the first place is because the Master fucked it up somehow when he tried to steal them in Power of the Doctor. I'd like for RTD to bring that up but I'm not holding my breath. That would require actually acknowledging other eras besides his own exist.

Overall, this was kind of a mid-tier RTD episode and very underwhelming for an anniversary special. Heres hoping it gets better in the next 2.

#the star beast #doctor who

[iexcistoutofspite]

MCR ALBUM REVIEWS - by silly little mentally ill autistic <3

I Brought You My Bullets You Brought Me Your Love

Overall sound:

10000000000000/10 literally the best one ever I will never listen to a better album in my life I live breather eat drink and sleep this album

Lyrics:

100000000/10 the masterpiece omg I love it so so much the lyrics have such great meaning and it's just so pretty and well written omg I need to grind it into a powder and snort it

Instrumental:

1000000000/10 again, it's a fucking masterpiece, thry all slayed so hard, the guitar solos, the bass lined and drums I love it all

Nostalgia value:

it hits so hard omg

Personal:

I. am. OBSESSED. I love this album so bad I need it injected into my bones

Fav trac(s):

Honey, this mirror isn't big enough for the two of us, Vampires will never hurt you, Drowning lessons, early sunsets over monroeville, demolition lovers

Skips:

no skips ♡

Listening notes:

- romance is an interlude

- I want to eat it

- bullets era my beloved

- I'm a depressed vampire who hides inside his burrow and drinks rats blood

Review:

MCR THANK YOU FOR THAT MASTERPIECE

I love every. singe. part of it. it's literally injected into my brain, I could listen to if for ours without end the best album I ever heard. I would pay MILLIONS to hear it for the 1st time once again. magical feeling. I'm turning into a homoerotic vampire every single time I hear it. I love it so much I could only listen to it for the rest of my life and never complain. I do however miss feeling happiness but who cares why you have ibymbybmyl. ♡

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Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge

Overall sound:

9/10 I love it

Lyrics:

100/10 another masterpiece it's so good it hurts

Instrumental:

100000/10 they all slayed once again

Nostalgia value:

I have so many memories good and bad

Personal:

my 2nd fav album. I love it so much, the STORY the lyrics and sound all of it comes together and creates a masterpiece

Fav trac(s):

To the End, You know what they do to guy like us in prison, the Ghost of you, the jetset lives is gonna kill, I never told you what I do for living

Skips:

I'm Not Okay (I promise) but only sometimes

Listening notes:

- the story omg

- THE LORE I LOVE LORE OMGGG

- good for drawing and painting

- rip grandma

- I'm literally the demo man

- relationship goals

Review:

just so much good stuff in it omg, I love it. I could listen to it for hours, drinking coffe and listening to it omg a dream come true

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The Black Parade

Overall sound:

9/10

Lyrics:

10/10 another masterpiece

Instrumental:

1000/10 they all slayed omg the guitar, the vocals the bass lines 😍

Nostalgia value:

has a special place in my heart

Personal:

the concept of cancer is both triggering and comforting to be because I lost 2 pets due to cancer so I find a comfort with it and also I think about death a lot so it's my vibes yknow

Fav trac(s):

This is how I disappear, Mama, the Sharpest lives, Cancer, Dead

Skips:

Welcome to the Black parade, teenagers- I mean they're not bad but it's just not for me

Listening notes:

- the story is absolutely beautiful

- crying time

- I miss my dead cats

- I DONT LOVE YOUUU LIKE I DID YESTERDAAAAYYYY

- I want to join the Black parade

- transgenderism at its finest

Review:

Very very good album. the story is very interesting. scary but in a good way. reminds me of very snowy winter. very cold. cold toes. starving for days, living only on black coffe and diet coke. I remember I was listening to it in 8th grade while other kids were talking behind my back and I heard the line "I an not afraid to keep on living, I and not afraid to walk this world alone" and I said to myself, fuck everything and everyone I'm gonna be who I want to be but who others want me to be and from that moment I started to express myself in the way I always wanted :)

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Danger Days

Overall sound:

1000/10 my love. my baby girl. my beautiful girlfriend DD ♡

Lyrics:

10000/10 another masterpiece

Instrumental:

1000/10 it's different than the rest but it's beautiful in itself and it's difference

Nostalgia value:

10000/10 late summer nights

Personal:

ever tho it gets so much hate and it's not my favorite I love it so much. mcr put their entire pussy into this album

Fav trac(s):

The only hope for me is you, DESTROYA, Vampire Money

Skips:

any of the interludes

Listening notes:

- feels like running away from your small hometown in the summer with your homoerotic lover

- night summer car rides

- red hair

- tboy swag

Review:

they slayed so hard on this album. u don't get why people hate on it it literally so good. the lore to the comic book omg. so good. yes ut us different but different is good. it makes me want to run away and steal shit bshshd fuck the government- it scratches my brain in the right places. gerard slayed with both the album and the asthetic. red hair- omg he's such  a slut fr. he's my slut, a cunt, my own personal man whore

#mcr album reviews #my chemical romance #mcr #gerard way #frank iero #ray toro #mikey way #michael romance #i love gerard way #im bored okay?

[kiefbowl]

here's something I believe that I think some people who follow me are not going to like to hear: TERFs are a moral panic, and it's going to end like a moral panic.

like 99.99% of moral panics just sort of fizzle out and then a select fringe of people still hold onto those beliefs. like there are still people living in the satanic panic heyday in their minds even today, but the normies moved on and what’s more don’t even remember participating. not to be a big bummer but that’s what’s going to happen with a lot of the terf/trans rhetoric. like those who have gone all in with trans rhetoric about sex is mutable and girl brain and w/e will probably hold on to those beliefs but get savvy about talking about it when tides shift. people who care now about feminism and homophobia are going to still care in 10 years. but people who are uncritical about the things they read about "terfs" and accept wholesale any trans activism b/c it feels liberal enough are just going to move on eventually and when news comes out about the wrongs of child transition and the regret people have about their transitions etc etc, they're not going to come out and say sorry to you. they won't remember sending you an anon when they were 14, or they won't remember the dumb comment fights they got into on stupid facebook posts about jkr or bathrooms or whatever. they're going to go "huh, wonder why no one was talking about that then, oh well. I always knew something was fishy" and then move on.

no one talks seriously about the occult anymore except extremist christians and yet some people still believe in suppressed memory and DID despite the lack of scientific evidence, and the connection between the two are not well understood by the general public because the abuse of power psychiatry took on it's patients during and because of the satanic panic has been swept under the rug.

as a feminist targeted by this moral panic, you really just have to be convicted in your own beliefs and try your best to live them out and stop expecting validation one way or the other from people. no one is going to apologize to "terfs" in 10 years. feminism has been the target of moral panics each and every new "wave." people are invested in hating feminism because they hate women. the people who still believe in women rushing the street burning their bras despite that never happening don't believe it because they have evidence, they believe it because they want to confirm the bias they already have. people have a bias about women anyway, so they are ready to believe that there are a group of women who are somehow simultaneously both the hairy man hating lesbians and 1950s housewives who just hate hate hate trans people and made up discourse to exclude them from feminist resources of which no one can define because people don't want to look further than that and don't care it doesn't make sense, they just go "see? I knew feminism has been secretly ran by bad, crazy women all these years. yes, rights for women, but do we have to be so angry and mean about it? chill out women!!" and in 10 year when Time magazine releases an award winning article about the "lost children" of transgenderism that barely mentions anything feminists did or said, people are just going to go "wow, who could have thought" and make literally 0 connection to terfs. you could probably say to them "remember terfs?" and they would be like "wow that was wild, yeah!! they were crazy feminists glad they died out" despite that not being even remotely close to what has happened since terfs aren't real and the things feminists believe won't fundamentally change in the future. they aren't keeping tabs on feminists, they're only keeping tabs on their twitter feed.

#posted unedited lmao #idc and don't really want this to blow up #it's more for the gender crit baby fems following me

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom season 2, episode 17-20 thoughts! finishing up season two! the finale is the THIRD 2-PARTER OF SEASON 2. that's so many! I wonder how many season 3 will have?

see prev episode thoughts in this tag <3

-UERGH WHY DOES VLAD HAVE AN AI WITH MADDIE'S FACE ON IT. SOOO CREEPY. AND MORE 'CREATIONS' waiiiit. vlad is Dr. Frankenstein! (despite his ghost design obviously referencing vampires) HE HAS 'CREATIONS' HE MAKES THEN WONT TAKE REAL RESPONSIBILITY FOR!!! this bitch.

-danny was late and his friends immediately start going off about how hes inconsiderate, and has been treating them like sidekicks??? he just overslept, my god. chill. even if he has, be nicer about talking about it with him?? he really can't help that he sometimes has to chase the ghosts, or has a secret identity to protect...

-'what kind of ghost haunts a miniature golf course' umm. me as a ghost. next question

-imagine going home and theres a tiny child on your bed claiming to be your cousin. with as many cousins I have, I would probably believe her. but the 'ran away from home' BIT....SHES 12?? SHES SO TINY. I hate that they have her belly out in her ghost form, but I like how her colors are asymmetrical. something about her design...maybe the proportions?? are weird to me...anyway danny was good to feed her, but he shouldve taken her to his parents FIRST. or, tbh, probably jazz. (JAZZ DIDNT EVEN GET TO MEET HER!!! NOOO. I mean she said she'll be BACK BUT STILL)

-ANYWAY. shes voiced by AnnaSophia Robb, the girl who was in because of winn dixie, played as violet from charlie and the chocolate factory, and was the girl from bridge to terrabithia. (the movie that made me cry hysterically when I was 12 and I never watched it again because it Broke Me!) thats super cool.

-vlad sucks: the episode, basically. what's new!! I love how he's like, I'm Not A Villain. *immediately cuts to him torturing danny to make him transform, to get mid-transformation DNA, to perfect a Clone.* *immediately shows that he doesnt give a shit about his new daughter Dani and just wants a ''more perfect clone'' and will put her in danger to get that. will let her DIE to get that*

-Dani is danny's clone and is a girl? transgenderism....one of them has to be trans. or they both are.

-dani just. leaving at the end. WHAT? SHES 12. DONT JUST. NO!!! SHE WAS PROBABLY JUST BORN, A MONTH AGO AT MOST, RIGHT?? SHE NEEDS...SOMEWHERE TO LIVE. MONEY? FOOD?? A FAMILY?? AN EDUCATION???! WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE'S LEAVING!!! OKAY BYE I GUESS!!! D: concern!!!

-the next ep opens with skulker chasing a ghost down. ...does skulker count as a ghost hunter in the way valerie and danny do? I mean, sure, he hunts the good guys too, but he. he hunts ghosts...also, we haven't seen his Real Form since his debut episode! tiny...

-the guys in white are back! ngl, I assumed they were a gag for that one episode. you're telling me they might actually be a threat? ok.

-valerie in her lil nasty burger uniform looks so cute!! glad shes not in that mascot uniform this time. I guess she stopped hiding that she's working there now?

-gregor having white hair, dressed in black and white...and green eyes...sam has a Type, I guess.

-danny being unnecessarily hostile about gregor. danny!!! hes been nice so far. he looks a little...tall to be 14, but. danny doesnt know anything about him! (he does Suspect, but...you cant just spy on people and be rude to them from a hunch.) also, gregor kissed her, and when she freaked out, he was like 'oh no!! sorry, we can take it slow! I understand!' which was NICE. I hate jealousy plots still tho.

-altho. umm. tucker, being concerned about danny spying on them??? SAM AND YOU WERE SPYING ON DANNY AND VALERIE A FEW EPISODES AGO!!!!! im not saying its RIGHT, but dont be a hypocrite!!! AND THEN SAM BEING MAD ABOUT IT, TOO.

-DANNY IS A 7 ON THE SCALE OF ECTOPLASMIC POWER!!! out of 10? so I want to know where the other ghosts rank...I mean it's a list from the guys in white, so, it may not even be accurate, like, they havent seen ALL of his powers, have they?

-Lancer being like 'im not cooperating with the FEDS' until they said they could access his tax records. they already did that joke with jack, but like, its still funny. kings of tax evasion.

-tucker's aggressive third-wheeling. but gregor being super into it. gregor/tucker is the real ship here. then gregor kissing danny on both cheeks after hugging him. bi poly king gregor. (he does turn out to be a liar with a phoney accent. unsurprising, BUT THE CONCEPT OF HIM BEING GENUINE AND THEM ALL DATING IS FUN)

-THE...GUYS IN WHITE THINKING GREGOR IS DANNY PHANTOM. LMAOOO. GET HIS ASS. or,, Elliot. lmfao

-sam saying tucker is part of the package because theyre friends was super sweet <3 but also 'part of the package'...polyships are obviously the solution to these dumb jealousy/love triangle plots.

-danny crashed a whole plane. the collateral damage...

-is he....

-you know....

.... (ITS NOT GAY IF YOU'RE DOING IT TO PRETEND TO BE SOMEONE YOU'RE NOT, AND LIE TO A GIRL. RIGHT? he was getting a little too into pretending to enjoy tucker's company, and the above...c'mon, guy.)

-lmao, freakshow is in actual prison. I didn't expect a follow up, or for him to show back up! in the finale of this season, too!

-THE SICK TATTOO GHOST IS NAMED LYDIA!!! more Lore On her. freakshow seemed genuinely concerned about her. also, is she mute? I don't think she talked the first time we saw her, either. and we didn't know freakshow 'envied' ghosts, either, the first time, we just knew he was controlling them. interesting!

-...they literally stole the infinity gauntlet from marvel and called it the reality gauntlet. is that legal. what the fuck. even with the gems in the lil slots, having different powers...they had freakshow in jail, but didnt check his pockets??! hes just still in his lil outfit??? what kind of ...oh, its in amity park. yeah, all of the adults are idiots, okay, sure.

-'freakshow!' 'in the anemic flesh!' dude take some iron pills then. also, sure, the red eyes could be contacts for his aesthetic, but the whites of his eyes are yellow! does he have jaundice?! he severely needs more...like, every kind of vitamin. (this is what im worried about as freakshow attacks danny with giant robots)

-again, goth circus is a sick theme, and I love his goth train.

-oh FUCK every single person saw danny transform. on a stage. including his parents via TV. oh god. the guys in white and immediately like 'youre coming in for experiments!' SCARY. at least the crowd is willing to help him to escape...perks of now being a local celeb! even the kids at school are accepting :) this is what, the third time his family has found out? its always been an alt timeline tho. and danny fully intending to just rewrite things again instead of...I dunno, trying to roll with it this time? hes really worried his family won't accept him, huh...

-'maybe our son IS THE GHOST BOY, but its not as if our family's ghostly activities have EVER PUT YOUR FAMILIES IN DANGER' maddie. mmmmmmmmmmmm. okay.

-danny 100% prepared to run away from home because of this :( oh :( and saying his parents are 'looking for him, or a scalpel to dissect him with' ouch...

-THE GUYS IN WHITE TRYING TO ARREST A 14 YEAR OLD. fuck da feds.

-side note (another one about voice actors...) freakshow's voice actor, Jon Cryer, was lex luthor in pretty much every DC tv show, which is why I recognized his voice, because my dad loves those shows so I've seen a good bit of them without seeking them out...)

-the old man saying 'hey, i still had minutes left!' and danny saying 'you gotta watch those roaming charges!' about danny destroying the people in the diner's phones so no one could report seeing him...would kids today understand these things. can you even BUY minutes anymore...I remember my first phone being a flip phone, and the fact I always had minutes when my sister ran out super fast, because I didnt have friends calling or texting me like she did...:/

-the fentons being genuinely like 'why didnt danny trust us and tell us this, we love him :(' and JAZZ LAYING INTO THEM WITH THE 'DISSECTION/MOLECULE BY MOLECULE' LINES. LITERALLLLY. they need to apologize

-technically, lydias stronger than you! -jazz lesbianism moments! when did you even learn her name!!! but also get freakshows ass. lydia is also cooler looking. looove her design sm still.

-jazz psychoanalyzing freakshow... (also, her also having ghost envy? au where jazz is a ghost!! id like to see it)

-im glad the kids still got to go to their respective vacation things, even if they cant really stick around and enjoy them much...

-furry: confirmed. (also tucker calling her hot. tucker is a furry confirmed)

-danny being mad someone at the comic con is selling comics of him without permission, lmfao. give him his royalties!

-freakshow > thanos because hes a drama clown and does use his gauntlet to be FLASHY AND DRAMATIC.

-jazz's 'USE PYSCOLOGY' to danny about freakshow LMAOO. AND THEN IT WORKING. but, oh, freakshow's ghost form sucks. I like him as a clown better tbh. good thing danny took away his ghost powers!

-his parents hugging him and saying theyre proud :"( and saying 'of course you lied to us, we never gave you a reason not to!' and saying they were in the wrong basically for always talking about hurting ghosts aaaa :""(

-then he WIPED THEIR MEMORIES AGAIN!!! FUCK. I can understand him wiping the goverments/student bodies' memories, but why his parents?? they were being accepting!! ARGHHH. season 3 couldve been them all trying to adjust to them knowing!

-I know, on a meta level the showrunners probably wanted to just reset things to the status quo of him having a secret identity. But. We've been doing that for (2) seasons, I'd love if season 3 could be like, his parents adjusting to this and trying way harder to learn more and accept it (and the shenanigans that could come from that) and for fun, if he didn't wipe the students memories, it could be him being popular for a while, then everyone slowly realizing, oh, he's still Danny. Like. he might have ghost powers but hes Just The Same Guy instead of putting him on a pedestal (and seeing them all try and help him hide it from the giw/people who don't know!!)

-fuck they didn't even explain WHY he wiped everyone except sam, tucker and jazz's memories. he just Did It right when his parents were saying they loved/accepted him!! and sam and tucker didnt question it at all!!! HELLO??? very annoyed about this turn of events.

-anyway. onto season 3! I know its shorter than the first two seasons, and is the last season... I might just do it in 2 bursts if I can... :3c depends on the episodes' content and how much I want to say about each!

#sanchoyorambles #danny phantom #dp thoughts

[drdemonprince]

Has treating transgenderism in the same manner as treating dissociative identity disorder been tried? They seem very similar.

ohohhohohohoho

In what way is shifting into one of literally dozens of alternate personalities (who often have completely different memories from one another, such that shifting personalities means having a dissociative fugue and losing consciousness) the same thing as being like “i’m a man i wish people would stop calling me miss” ? 

Also i hate to break it to you but there aren’t any treatments for DID that make it go away, buddy. therapy is mostly about giving the person tools to cope with trauma symptoms and help them navigate a very un-accommodating social world. 

so like, in a way the treatment for DID is already the same as treatment for trans people. but not in the way you’re thinking. ideally therapists are supposed to accept and accommodate the person as they are rather than trying to change or cure them 

[thatringboy]

Kinda of a Coming Out Rant

For context, my grandparents on my Dad’s side of the family live in a rual valley in Colorado. The town has only ~5,000 people and 2/5 of the population is religious. My Grandparents’ church, the First Baptist Church (FBC), is the largest in the valley with close to 200 members - most of them being elderly and handicapped people. The FBC does many out reach programs to people in poverty and regularly sends groups to third world countries to help deliver supplies and teach children. The FBC also holds a huge Vacation Bible School (VBS) during the summer that I grew up going to. It always has 200 or so kids from the community and this was going to be the first year I could volunteer to help. The FBC was like my second family.

Was.

Two Winters ago, before they renovated the entire campus, I think it was the Sunday after Christmas, we were listening to the Pastor’s sermon when he brought up the Coexist sign

At the time, I still had very limited access to the internet and didn’t know what the symbols meant. The Pastor was always like another Grandfather to me and I cared for him deeply, but thinking back to this memory makes me loose my respect for him.

He started reading out the symbols and he stopped on the “e” - the one with the gender markings. He then proceeded to joke and laugh about “how his nephew things he’s a girl!” and other transphobic comments.

I had no idea was transgenderism was at the time, but I knew him making fun of his niece (the trans nephew) was wrong. Of course, I couldn’t say anything, but I wish I had. I haven’t heard anything new about the niece and I hope she is doing well.

It only occurred to me during last summer - the last time I was at the town - just how homophobic and transphobic they were. I was only there for a week last year and another kid my age had cyan colored hair. He was completely straight, but simply because he had colored hair - the pastor’s daughters (who ran the Youth Group meetings) conveniently forgot about him during activities. It was total bullshit!

Flash foward to the 2019 Christmas and my grandparents drove down from Colorado to Texas to spend the Holidays with us. They’re actually on their way down for the Summer as I’m typing this, but that’s off topic.

The Holidays are going great - I was pretending to be cis, I had started rereading the Percy Jackson books and everything was really merry until my parents called me downstairs the night my grandparents had to return to Colorado. They sat me down in the kitchenette - all four adults - and proceeded to ask me questions about my faith in Jesus and why I felt the “need to want to be a boy”.

I was appalled! My own parents had outed me to my grandparents! I didn’t want to come out to them until after I had started my transition!

And to this day, whenever my dad gets onto me for not being trust worthy and hiding things from him, I think of this.

My grandparents legitimately think that I am dammed and will go to hell for “wanting to be a boy”.

I didn’t think it could get any worse until earlier today when I was doing the dishes. I started thinking about how I’d be stuck with my grandparents for a while this up coming week, which isn’t a bad thing! I love them and their 50th anniversary is coming up! I’m just pissed at my parents for telling them that I’m trans.

And then I remembered the FBC of their town.

My grandfather is a Deacon at the FBC and does the morning prayers on Sundays. Many people share prayer requests about family members to the congregation and they all pray about it together.

I realized that there is a good chance that my grandparents also outed me to their church, my use-to-be home away from home. Am I anxious about that thought? Extremely so. A little nauseous actually.

Even though my grandparents mean well and love me with the bottom of their hearts, my beloved secret is no longer mine to share.

I’ve never had the chance of coming out to my immediate family because my parents check all of my electronics on a regular basis and give me privacy “only when I’ve earned it”, so my fricking youtube algorithm outed me. I was really looking forward to one day going to my grandparents in my early 20′s - already on testosterone - and proudly say:

“Nane, Papa, I am your grandson, Percy.”

But I don’t get to do that anymore.

Coming out is scary and hard and can change a person’s life. I don’t get the chance to come out and it hurts. It hurts more than the dysphoria I get when on my period. I’ve been betrayed and my trust in my parents is gone. It has been gone for a while and they don’t even know it.

So to all of you who know someone who is LGBTQIA+ who trusted you with the knowledge of their gender/sexuality, listen up:

Please don’t out them.

Please.

Even if it means having to misgender them in public and you later calling to apologize, don’t out them before they’re ready.

Put in the effort to keep your loved ones safe.

Think before you speak. Think before you post. Think before you out someone.

We all just wanna Coexist.

#lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtqia #coming out #please don't out someone #transgender #FtM trans #coexist #spread love not hate #if you out someone i will steal your kneecaps

[those-goddamn-bats]

why JKR’s stance on transgenderism is wrong

This post is in response to the tweets that J. K. Rowling posted on her Twitter. Warning: Transphobia.

Basically, what she’s trying to say is that transgender people are erasing the concept of Sex, and she doesn’t support that, and therefore, she cannot support transgenderism. Which is not right, for the following reasons.

“If sex isn’t real...”

Okay, first of all, NOBODY is saying that sex isn’t real. We aren’t denying the existence of the concept of sex. What you need to udnerstand is that Gender is very different from Sex. For transgender people, their gender differs from their sex. For most cisgender people, their gender is often the same as their sex. Sex is real, but can differ from a person’s gender identity. Transgender people sometimes choose to medically transition because their sex is different from their gender, and this sometimes causes them dysphoria, and in these cases medical transitioning can improve their health and reduce dysphoria.

“If sex isn’t real, the lived reality of women globally is erased.”

Now that we’ve established that sex is real, I’d like to acknowledge that yes, people of the female sex have been oppressed for a long, long time. Perhaps for as long as human history. And as an AFAB person myself, I understand. I sympathise. Transgender people aren’t trying to invalidate the experiences that the female sex has faced. Please understand, Rowling, that you are holding onto misconceptions.

“The idea that women like me, [...] ‘hate trans people because they think sex is real and has lived consequences - is a nonsense.”

With all due respect, to Rowling and all cis females, just because you are a cisgender female, that doesn’t mean that you’re immune to being a TERF. JKR, you not only have misconceptions about transgender people and the concepts of gender vs sex, you are using those misconceptions to invalidate the experiences of transgender people, implying that we are wrong for doing omething that we aren’t doing (re: erasing the concept of sex). That is hate. You are spreading hate. Please stop. You are upholding and encouraging the oppression that transgender people have faced in human memory.

“It isn’t hate to speak the truth.”

Of course it isn’t. But it IS hate to spread false claims pretending that that is the truth, when that false claim contributes to the oppression of a certain innocent group of people. It is transphobia. You aren’t entitled to your opinion- nobody is. People are only entitled to their EDUCATED opinions. Educate youself on transgenderism before preaching to us and insisting that your harmful opinion is right.

“I’d march with you if you were discriminated against on the basis of being trans.”

Okay, look, firstly, nobody’s asking you to march with us. You don’t have to. Nobody’s asking you to be vocal about your support for transgender people, nobody wants you to march at Pride and be an advocate for transgender rights (although all of those things would be incredibly helpful). We just need (need!) you to accept that we exist, and not invalidate our experiences. Secondly, how can you say that transgender people aren’t being discriminated against on the basis of being trans? People have been tortured, raped, murdered, bullied, fired and injured for being transgender, and no other reason. Need proof? 2019 2018 2017 2016 (source: human rights campaign) (anyone who sees this, feel free to list more!)

Essentially, I’m writing this post to reach out to all the TERFs out there who share JKR’s belief. Because she’s wrong. She’s spreading hate. I know she most likely won’t see this, but I hope everyone who does see this understands more about transgenderism and if you have any questions, feel free to drop me a message and ask! If you’re pissed off by me, feel free to unfollow and block me!

Also, as a postscript, I know that there are other big issues in the world to worry about right now. I couldn’t brush past JKR’s tweets without saying something. Ignorance should not be tolerated.

#transphobia #TW TRANSPHOBIA #tw rape #tw murder #tw bullying #transgender #trans #pride #trans pride #pride month #jk rowling #rowling

[thehonestbanana]

Onion is saying Sarah is getting 'revenge' by exposing him for his actions, that him and Kai are perfectly innocent, and that his 'dat booty tho' comment to her when she was 16 was just an innocent joke. So her being hurt and saying sarcastically 'sorry for raping you guys' is not a joke, but him making inappropriate sexual comments to a minor is? He literally made videos on how she was previously r*ped, a story she told Kai in private, along with videos shaming BDP and weed. Revenge much?

No okay anon. Look. Okay. Look. Okay? Here’s. The mother fucking. Tea. Yeah? Okay? Okay! Let’s go.

Fuck Greg lmao. He said before in quite a few occasions if you make a “joke” and you say it in a serious tone you mean it. I think he said that in reference to talking about shane, sooooo yknow. So when Sarah made a joke about “r*ping” then he’s gonna think she meant it and that’s proof. Then again even if it was in a sarcastic tone, like overly sarcastic gregs still gonna be like “OH OH SHE SAID IT!! SHE R*PED ME!!!!” Thats just how pathetic he is. Also it really shows how much he can do things but everyone else can’t. His was a joke but Sarah’s wasnt. It’s fucking pathetic considering he ended up having SEX WITH SARAH EVEN WHEN KAI WAS GONE WHY WOULD HE INVITE KAI’S R*PIST BACK AND DATE HER SEPARATELY!?

Also yeah, Greg uses ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING against someone. Like... she was r*ped Greg....why do you feel the need to bring that up? What does that have to do with anything? Also BPD, you admitted you had it yourself Greg. You said you were diaganosed lmao so whatever you said about Sarah who DOESNT HAVE IT BTW(she said it herself)... you fucked your self. Weed he already goes off on weed like a goddamn little nark because billie smoked weed. It’s fucking weed, omg call the cops, it’s legal in Washington greg. He’ll use anything against him, bet when he and Kai divorce he’s gonna use kais transgenderism against him, and his family because “Kai didn’t meet my needs and his family always caused drama.” He fucking used Sam’s(?) memory thing to fuck with her and he asked someone else to tell him her issues. He uses Shane’s weight against him, jaclyn he uses Richie against her and her boob job, EC he uses her ED to talk about her and possibly hurt her(he made her starve in the sims... possibly my ass) anyone and anything if he knows it hurts you he’ll use it. He even used Kai’s assault story for whatever fucking reason before. Anything and everthing it doesn’t matter.

But god forbid you use any of his past against him OH NOOOOOOO! Fucking god I hate him.

[thepropertylovers]

Feature Friday with Rowyn Mottershead

Happy Friday! Any plans this weekend? Middle kiddo R started school today (yay!), something we’ve been hoping would be able to happen for a while now. His brother and sister are already enrolled in school and he was feeling a little left out, so we’re all thrilled he’ll be able to finally go now, too.

Today’s Feature Friday is a special one. Rowyn has a beautiful, important story to share, and his words on life, love, and self-acceptance ring true no matter what stage of life you’re in. We loved getting to know Rowyn and we think you will, too. See what we mean below…

On the beauty of a road trip: My favourite place I have travelled to is Colorado, it was on a road trip with my fiancé last year. He is American and I am British so it blew my mind to see the vast land and untouched beauty of the states. We drove through Arkansas, Oklahoma, New Mexico and Colorado, each state with it own unique character and landmarks. I’ll never forget it and it motivates me to move out to the USA once I am married to my partner.

On a fortunate upbringing: I grew up in a small market town in the south of England. The area is conservative in attitudes but with accepting values, I didn’t know any LGBT people growing up but still I knew my family would love me regardless of my identity. I had a privileged middle-class upbringing and I’m thankful for the education and opportunities it brought me. I picked up learning piano and bass guitar when I was 10 years old and went on to pour all my energy into creative outlets. Most of my family were never concerned at this unconventional artistic focus and encouraged me to improve my music, art, food, films, whatever took my fancy. This lead me to where I am today in my multi-disciplined career as a musician, filmmaker and professional chef. 

On the influence of family to succeed: I come from an accomplished family so that made me very ambitious, my grandfather is a world-renowned theatre engineer and choir singer and he made it clear to me that I should always follow my passion and drive to find success rather than following money. Growing up with the expectation to succeed used to scare me a lot but now it fuels the confidence I have in my abilities. I had access to instruments and equipment that meant I had the building blocks for my skills from a young age, again I have privilege to thank for this. 

“Correcting people can be exhausting and unrewarding work, so really I also learnt that the people who really care about you the most, will do that emotional labour on your behalf…”

On an unexpected, impressive skill: I learnt to solve Rubik’s cubes when I was 12 years old, I can now solve a 5x5x5 cube in 10 minutes and a 3x3x3 cube in less than 2 minutes. In the past I have won bets on the basis of this skill because people tend not to believe me when I tell them I can do this! Never underestimate the power of someone with good memory and good dexterity!

On what he loves about himself: My patience and dedication to any cause I care about. I’ve always gotten satisfaction out of a good job done well, as well as excelling people’s expectations. I can multitask and keep track of my work so that I don’t get overwhelmed, which is a very useful skill in the kitchen at my job as a full time sushi chef! I love that I have a job that I’m very good at and that I enjoy very much. On a physical level, I love my naturally honey coloured hair :)

On what brings him joy in life: Wow there are so many possible answers for this. My passions that I have worked on the longest is my songwriting. I have explored myself and my life through lyrics and melody for nearly 20 years and it’s an incredibly important part of my life. I also find a lot of happiness in activities dancing, skating, swimming and hiking, as well of course as spending time with my fiancé, Liam. My three pet rats would also be high on that list!

On being open to who he is: I came out as transgender in 2013 when I was 16 years old, I had left school and met new friends at college so I transitioned smoothly into a masculine role at that time. However I found myself coming out again at 22 as a gay man, as I had found myself for the last 6 years being viewed as a bisexual androgynous mystery. I wanted to clarify how I felt but I felt some level of shame being both a ‘failed woman’ as a trans man and a ‘failed man’ as a gay man. I’m still working on this internalised homophobia and cisnormativity and I’m glad to be finally open about who I am.

On the importance of support: My family are very close and never stopped loving me or viewed me any differently. The adjustment to my new name and pronouns however took years for some people, especially my Dad, but they never stopped me from doing what I wanted. 7 years into my life as Rowyn, I think they recognise that this was the best decision for me, and we have never looked back. Most of the other people in my life these days have no idea who I was before I transitioned, and I would like to keep it that way. I faced some criticism in 2013 because transgenderism was not mainstream knowledge as it is today, I spent a lot of time educating people and explaining that no, this is not just because I wear my hair short and don’t like skirts, it’s a lot deeper than that.

On a learned lesson: I learnt that gender and sexuality is not straightforward, that it can be felt and perceived in many different ways. I had people close to me say that they will always view me as female and I had people I barely knew saying they had always felt a male energy from me. I had people assume I would fall in love with a woman and people assume that I had no sexual desires at all. I learnt that coming out is something you have to do over and over again, especially as a trans person who gets misgendered. Correcting people can be exhausting and unrewarding work, so really I also learnt that the people who really care about you the most, will do that emotional labour on your behalf, correcting friends and family in private to make your life easier. 

On his advice to today’s LGBTQ youth: I would say it is impossible to live your life on other people’s terms. Even if your family struggle to understand or accept your identity, you will only find happiness by being true to yourself. There are so many people out there who will love you exactly the way you are so if those people aren’t surrounding you, do your best to move into spaces where you will be supported. The people that mind don’t matter and the people that matter don’t mind. Obviously some people don’t have the opportunity to escape certain situations, but you can always reach out online to find like-minded people and realise you are not alone and you are not ‘freakish’, you are just your own variety of normal, and that is beautiful :)

“Life gets good when you stop waiting for the right time and seize the moment”

On the decision to finally start living life the way he wanted: Medical transition felt like a deep dark well of impossibility for many years. When I was 16 my parents decided I was too young for it and told me to wait until I was ‘ready’... well I felt I was ready at 16... so I then spent years waiting for anything to cement itself further so I could take the next step. But nothing changed, I went to university, continued living with physical discomfort and daily misgendering. I lost track of my mental health, slipped into an unhealthy relationship, somehow graduated on time at 21 and realised that I was still no closer to hormones and surgery and being ‘male’ then I was 5 years ago. At this point I decided to pay for private treatment so I could finally start living my life and overcome this burden of dysphoria. I’m so glad I did this and finally took control of my life. I had top surgery 6 months ago (at great expense) and the pay-off of anticipation was so worth it. Just being able to feel the fabric of a shirt on my back and the flatness of my chest feels like overcoming  the biggest obstacle I have ever faced.

On his biggest inspirations: In my daily life- my fiancé Liam [is my biggest inspiration]. He has incredible physical and mental stamina, he can run many miles at a time and write thousands of words in one sitting, and always has energy spare to shower me in love. In my professional life- my friend and collaborator Fox Fisher who has worked tirelessly over the past 8 years to make their content by and for the trans community. And in my musical life- singer/songwriter Orla Gartland who I have been following on YouTube for about 10 years. She is roughly the same age as me and has written countless incredible songs about very raw emotional experiences. Seeing us both grow as musicians over the years has brought me a lot pride and strength. 

On looking forward to the future: Married to Liam and probably living in the state of Arkansas where Liam is from. I hope to be running my own kitchen with a sustainable and vegetarian menu. I hope to be living on a homestead where we grow our own food and keep our own livestock. I hope to have employees that care as much about the food and the planet as I do. I hope to have time in the evenings to play music with my husband and laugh with friends. I hope to have some cute pets, as a stepping stone to starting my own family with Liam. Above all of course, I hope to be happy. 

On the power of believing in yourself: Life gets good when you stop waiting for the right time and seize the moment; whether it be proposing to the man of your dreams, furthering your skill set, taking small steps to fulfil your personal goals, or just taking a walk outside in the sunshine. Whatever you do to make a moment your own will be meaningful, will be something to look back on and be proud of. From being a confused depressed teenager to being an accomplished chef with a future husband and a transitioned body, only took a few years of hard work and positive thinking, and all it /really/ took was the belief in myself to succeed.

Thank you so much, Rowyn! You can follow him on Instagram here. Have a wonderful weekend, y’all!

[flatstarcarcosa]

extremely detailed character meme (Van, ships: right on target and far from any road)

found this on my dash and i thought i’d fill it in! under a cut b/c it is REALLY detailed! some of the questions don’t apply for me, and i tried to make it easy to tell which ship i’m referring too b/c some things are different here and there 

Character Chart Character’s full name: Van (pronounced vaughn, rhymes with fawn) Miller Reason or meaning of name: None  Character’s nickname: None, aside from petnames Reason for nickname: None Birth date: for ship: right on target: 10/03/1990 for ship: far from any road: 10/03/1970  Physical appearance Age: ship: right on target: 29\ ship: far from any road: 24 in 95, 30 in 02, 40 in 2012 How old do they appear: Perpetually babyfaced. So about 15 or so until they hit their mid 30′s Weight: honestly i don’t know Height: 5′2 (look what’s the point of a self insert if i can’t achieve my dream of being at least five foot tall all right) Body build: stronk.  Shape of face: square ish?  Eye color: grey Glasses or contacts: glasses, doesn’t like them unless they’re sunglasses though, prefers to squint and look like a hamster  Skin tone: pale/sickly at times, tan if they’ve been in the sun, but still very white  Distinguishing marks: pointy canines  Predominant features: nothing really sticks out, van’s physical features are pretty normal Hair color: naturally a muted blonde. prone to dying it a bright yellow in 95 and 02 for ship: far from any road. dyed black for ship: right on target Type of hair: straight Hairstyle: fluffy, over hair sprayed mullet ponytail thing for ‘95, ‘02 has a less hair band style looking thing but still pretty punky, ‘12 Van has what i call the ‘business undercut’ (far from any road). also just a normal, kind of spiky undercut for (right on target) Voice: i dont know how to answer this?  Overall attractiveness: this is just a bad question  Physical disabilities: I’m gonna break this one down because one thing i love about my self inserts is modifying my own, actual disabilities a bit so: far from any road: van has kidney and bladder problems that get progressively worse as time goes on, and undiagnosed celiac disease. because of a severe motorcycle accident in ‘89 they also have a weak/bum leg that is prone at times to flaring up with pain and instability with no warning. after a second motorcycle accident in ‘95, these things get a lot worse. by the time ‘12 rolls around van resigns themself to having traded in their bike years earlier for an actual car and using a cane. they’re not happy about it.  right on target: same kidney/bladder/digestive issues. bum leg is a side effect of general chronic pain caused by it. their leg has a habit of still going out at random, and despite needing a cane sometimes they refuse to use it. lester always keep an eye out in case their leg is about to collapse under them. he’s grabbed them many times to keep them from hitting the ground.  Usual fashion of dress: dark, leather, jeans, punky looking things.  Favorite outfit: leather jacket, motorcycle boots even if they’re not riding, jeans.  Jewelry or accessories: big clunky silver rings. right on target!van has a solid black metal band on their left thumb that matches one lester has.

Personality Good personality traits: tries to be kind, tries to make things better for others at the expense of themself, funny, loves animals,  Bad personality traits: addiction problems, quick temper, far from any road!van likes to hustle people at bars and get into bar fights but usually only if they’ve been provoked  Mood character is most often in: it cycles a lot, so  Sense of humor: good? this is a vague question  Character’s greatest joy in life: photography, making people laugh, alone time Character’s greatest fear: death, being in poverty again/being stuck in poverty,  Why? being poor is Not Fun What single event would most throw this character’s life into complete turmoil? far from any road: something happening to rust. they don’t realize at it first but he’s become their grounding agent, and without him there to balance them out they would not fare well.  right on target: lester’s brief stint of being fucking dead and murdered on TV wasn’t a good time.  Character is most at ease when: it’s cold and rainy out and they have an excuse to stay in bed and snooze.  Most ill at ease when: surrounded by too many people and too many noises. Enraged when: hhhhhhhhhhhhh often? the worst they get is in ‘95 when marty makes a few jabs at their trauma and they beat him bloody before rust pulls them off him.  Depressed or sad when: also often, sometimes for no reason. thats kind of what clinical depression is. Priorities: money. taking care of themself with it in order to be able to help others. Life philosophy: sometimes you don’t have to be great, you can just be okay.  If granted one wish, it would be: ability to change gender/sex characteristics at will. Why? it’s the transgenderism (i use that word satirically and as a joke, for those that don’t know that’s a te]]]rf dogwhistle in other situations, a lot of trans people have taken it back)  Character’s soft spot: their pets and the fact that being a raging asshole is a front they have to actively work at. Is this soft spot obvious to others? depends on the person. to rust? yes. to lester? not as much.  Greatest strength: refusal to give up. Greatest vulnerability or weakness: raging asshole disease and the addiction issues. Biggest regret: developing addiction issues.   Minor regret: it also cycles like their moods. Biggest accomplishment: far from any road: got a bachelor’s degree in sociology before deciding to get into journalism.  right on target: ??? van doesn’t feel accomplished. lester is trying to encourage them at going to college but he’s not very good at it.  Minor accomplishment: “not fucking dead yet, assholes”  Past failures he/she would be embarrassed to have people know about: far from any road: van was never able to find out who it was in the south texas area that was targeting members of the LGBT community, that’s the whole reason they ended up with the crusaders and met rust, they had reason to believe it was someone connected to the gang. despite help from rust, the investigation went nowhere and all they have is a half finished expose.  right on target: they didn’t try to leave an abusive situation sooner. Why? see above Character’s darkest secret: i? don’t know??   Does anyone else know? N/A Goals Drives and motivations: just live the best they can Immediate goals: not die Long term goals: not die, perhaps be less of an alcoholic  How the character plans to accomplish these goals: slowly?  How other characters will be affected: they help.  Past Hometown: --- Type of childhood: traumatic Pets: dogs, frogs, turtles, hamsters First memory: ---- Most important childhood memory: ----  Why:  ------ Childhood hero:------ Dream job: ------ Education: bachelor’s degree for far from any road, GED for right on target Religion: atheistic but understanding and accepting of others Finances: far from any road: not fucking superb, hence the side hustles. right on target: poor  Present Current location: far from any road: Louisiana, i don’t remember TD ever stating where at aside from in the sticks right on target: NYC  Currently living with: rust or lester  Pets: far from any road is various pets at various times, right on target is initially just the doggo. Religion: still the same  Occupation: hustler slash freelance journalist for far from any road, unemployed for right on target Finances: better by 2012 (far from any road) thanks to a boring but stable office job, and for right on target they have lester’s money now and even lester doesn’t know how much he has aside from “a lot”. Family Mother: ------- Relationship with her: nonexistent    Father: Bastard Sr. Relationship with him: nonexistent.  Siblings: sister, older Relationship with them: non existent Spouse: rust/lester Relationship with him/her: i mean in both settings it’s a long term (rust right at around 20 years if you count their time in the crusaders initially, lester about 7 years) so, good if complicated at times Children:  no Relationship with them: none Other important family members: none  Favorites Color: purple, green, black Least favorite color: red Music: prog rock Food: pizza, waffles, hash browns, cereal  Literature: lots! really, its across all genres Form of entertainment: viddy gaems Expressions: what?  Mode of transportation: motorcycle or car  Most prized possession: also motorcycle or car Habits Hobbies: viddy gaemz, photography, sketch comedy  Plays a musical instrument? nah Plays a sport? is pool a sport?  How he/she would spend a rainy day: cozy in bed, s***ing some d***  Spending habits: they are fucking cheap as fuck whether they have money or not Smokes: yes, they say they’re planning to quit but [thor voice] is he though  Drinks: yes, it’s the alcoholism  Other drugs: pills mostly. to be fair they do HAVE to have a lot of meds because of chronic illness but they do love them some benzos  What does he/she do too much of? drinks, sleeps, smokes What does he/she do too little of? healthy food, exercise  Extremely skilled at: hustling. that works in both setting because with rust they learned it themself, with lester he taught them. also, writing.  Extremely unskilled at: art, socialising with people  Nervous tics: knuckle cracking,  Usual body posture: crosses arms a lot  Mannerisms: ???? Peculiarities: ????? Traits Optimist or pessimist? pessimist  Introvert or extrovert? introvert  Daredevil or cautious? cautious  Logical or emotional? both actually, it’s not fun Disorderly and messy or methodical and neat? disorderly and messy, clashes with rust’s methodical and neat Prefers working or relaxing? relaxing  Confident or unsure of himself/herself? switches rapidly between both  Animal lover? yes Self-perception How he/she feels about himself/herself: bad.  One word the character would use to describe self: asshole  One paragraph description of how the character would describe self: no good alcoholic junkie with a shitty temper, a shittier outlook and few skills or worth to bring to the table except a raging selfish streak What does the character consider his/her best personality trait? sense of humor  What does the character consider his/her worst personality trait? temper  What does the character consider his/her best physical characteristic? thicc What does the character consider his/her worst physical characteristic? crippled How does the character think others perceive him/her: badly,  What would the character most like to change about himself/herself: alcoholism  Relationships with others Opinion of other people in general: they try to be cordial, unless they’re in traffic, in which case it’s fuck you and your fucking mother you stupid fucking motherfucker  Does the character hide his/her true opinions and emotions from others? yes Person character most hates: [redacted]  Best friend(s): @dadbodsandbots is p much hanging out somewhere in every setting  Love interest(s): rust and lester  Person character goes to for advice: they don’t, that requires enough vulnerability to admit there’s a problem Person character feels responsible for or takes care of: also rust and lester Person character feels shy or awkward around: van is very uncomfortable around marty most of the time, he reminds them of their father. it smooths out as time goes on, but still. also when lester was stuck with the DA, they didn’t like daken at first  Person character openly admires: ehh? Person character secretly admires: ehh?  Most important person in character’s life before story starts: ehh?  After story starts: ehh? 

found here

#van.me #ship: far from any road #ship: right on target #lms if read?????

[ciathyzareposts]

Missed Classic 67: Ballyhoo (1986) – Introduction

Written by Joe Pranevich

Infocom careened into 1986 on the backs of two contradictory pieces of information. Sales had been up in 1985 for an all-time high of $11.5 million, and yet the company was falling apart. The Cornerstone flop was a distant memory, but the winter layoffs that followed were not. Marc Blank, founder and co-developer of the Zork series, Deadline, and Enchanter was out. So was Al Vezza, the CEO. Mike Berlyn had left even before Fooblitzky had been released with the graphics team as one of the layoff casualties. Infocom was in active negotiations with Activision for a buyout, although how much of this was known during the development of Ballyhoo is unclear. What is clear is that the announcement of Activision’s intent to merge came out within days of Ballyhoo’s release. This would be the last game ever released by an independent Infocom.

Into this maelstrom entered Jeff O’Neill, a first time Implementor. Originally from California, he came to Infocom with a background in journalism and a smidge of computer science. He put those skills to use doing QA on Wishbringer, Hitchhiker’s Guide, and likely other games. He also subbed in as a writer for the The New Zork Times, the company newsletter. Unlike many of the other Imps, Jeff has kept his privacy post-Infocom and so we know less about him than other team members. We’ll see his touch here and in Nord and Bert (1987), plus he was one of the contributors to Bureaucracy (also 1987). I look forward to getting to know him through his games.

($11.18 in today’s dollars.) 

Prior to this marathon, I knew very little about Ballyhoo. Like many of the games in the first Lost Treasures set, I dipped a toe in twenty-five or more years ago, but I recall not “getting it” and ending a few turns in. My confusion may have been because Ballyhoo is listed as a “mystery” game, the successor to the Sergeant Duffy series of games (Deadline, The Witness, and Suspect) but without (as far as I know) continuing that series directly. I don’t recall even what the mystery was. The 1995 re-release recategorized the game as a “comedy”. Is it a comedy mystery? Or a mystery comedy? To make things even more confusing, it was initially developed as the third “junior” game (after Seastalker and Wishbringer), but that was abandoned before release. So how does this game play and feel? I’ll find out soon enough.

The manual opens with a souvenir program for “The Traveling Circus that Time Forgot”, an old-fashioned circus that my character has recently attended. We also have a balloon, a copy of our ticket, and an ad for an old cure-all in the box. I attended a Barnum and Bailey circus once as a kid in the 1980s. Even then they were old-fashioned; I remember pushing past protestors handing out anti-animal act fliers before we were in the door. That may have soured my opinion of the circus and I never went to another one. Thirty-odd years later, touring “three ring” circuses like that are gone, replaced in part by the upscale Cirque du Soleil and similar acts.

The program is mostly concerned with the story of Thomas Munrab (“Barnum” spelled backwards) and his players. He was a graduate of Harvard Business School, but invested in the circus even when everyone else thought it was stupid. The program says “backwards vision and superlative genius” but it is not difficult to read between the lines:

Sounds so simple yet it is hard to imagine the tremendous quantum of resistance and awesome challenge that would confront this would-be modern day P. T. Barnum. Immediately you would hear the voice of the naysayers. their prickly criticism intended to burst your balloon deriding such “pipe dreams” as low tech and low brow, logistically impossible, financially unfeasible. And imagine the embarrassment of getting laughed out of the Harvard Club!

As Infocom was a MIT shop, I expect there is more than a hint of cross-town Harvard/MIT rivalry in this description. Beyond their “stable genius”-level founder, the circus consists of:

Glorious Gloria, a trapeze artist

The Amazing Genatossio Brothers (Carlo, Giuseppe, Antonio, and Stefano), a hire-wire act

Gottfried Wilhelm van Katzenjammer, an animal tamer

Comrade Thumb, a 28-inch tall clown

Chuckles, Mystic Malcom, and other clowns

Rimshaw the Incomparable, a fortune-teller

Tina, the fat lady

Andrew Jenny, a “strange union of a man and a woman in one body”

I have no idea how much of this will matter, but I take notes anyway. As I look at this, I am particularly struck– and worried– by how Tina and “Andrew Jenny” will be portrayed in the game. Both are included as examples of “circus freaks”, but obesity isn’t quite as funny as it used to be. I am also worried about transgender stereotypes and the possibility that Andrew / Jenny will be depicted in poor taste. Then again, the program says that he/she is split right down the middle with an Andrew-half and a Jenny-half which is not the way any real kind of transgenderism works. I’m going to accept this as a period piece rather than worry too much immediately on the game as a commentary on non-binary genders or gender dysphoria.

Music to soothe the savage beast, eh?

The rest of the program includes a brief history of traveling circuses, connecting them to events going all the way back to Roman arenas. It also introduces circus slang which may come up in the game. Filling out the rest of the manual is a standard Infocom text including sample commands and recommendations for new players. The only new material there is that we will be solving a kidnapping plot. Sounds like fun!

Before I begin, I was already clued in to a major problem in my version of the game: the Lost Treasures set is missing a page (above) from the program which is required for copy protection. I found the page online, but it means I already have a good clue to one of the puzzles if the answer is there.

There doesn’t seem to be too much more to say about the game. Let’s play!

The circus came to town!

As the game begins, we are a disgruntled circus-goer that just finished watching a lackluster performance. And yet… we also have an “irrational desire to steal the spotlight, defy death, and bask in the thunder of applause”. Do we take over the circus when we win? Or is this just to suggest why we might help a circus to solve a mystery?

There’s not much to do except look around. I double-back into the Big Top as other spectators are just about all gone. It wasn’t a “three ring” circus, but rather a two-ringed one. A ring to the west that I cannot access is for animal acts, while this one is for the acrobats. The hire-wire is still set up with a safety net below. I can even climb up to try to cross it! This appears to be a puzzle as I have to cross slowly and “lean” to the north and south to keep my balance, but I quickly fall into the net below. I may have a reason to do this later. For now, I’m just impressed that none of the guards or ushers or clowns or anyone else didn’t stop some idiot (me!) from climbing up there and nearly getting himself killed.

I file out with the crowd and make it outside. In the main “connection” between the circus events and the Midway to the east, I find a small person wearing a general’s outfit. That must be Comrade Thumb, the world’s smallest man. Quick searching suggests that he is based on Francis Joseph Flynn, aka “General Mite”, a diminutive 19th century circus performer. He’s struggling to drink from a water fountain, but it’s too high for him. I help him up and he thanks with a salute before walking away. I cannot head east as I need to have a special ticket to access the Midway through a set of turnstiles, so I follow Thumb to the south instead.

Just to the south, Thumb is joined by Chuckles, another clown. They arrive at a second set of turnstiles. They say something to a guard and they are allowed to pass through. The guard does not let me through so I cannot follow them. I wander west instead and find myself in the prop tent where I hear voices approaching from outside. I do what any sensible person would do: hide. Munrab and a Detective arrive and speak to each other in whispers. The detective actually asks why they are whispering and Munrab breaks the fourth wall by reminding him that they are in a mystery. Munrab explains that his daughter Chelsea has been kidnapped, but he neither suspects anyone in the circus nor trusts the local police. He hands over a photo to the detective. After a brief exchange, they both leave the tent and I can come out of hiding. The game has begun for real! I don’t think the detective is supposed to be Duffy, both because he doesn’t seem to be competent and because he is a PI rather than police. I’ll see if we can get a better look later.

Our 27th President. He was the last President to appoint a non-lawyer to the Supreme Court. 

My first step is to map out the circus grounds as best as I can to look for clues. Rather than a blow-by-blow, this is what I found:

The prop tent contains a stand-up figure of President Taft and a gorilla suit. I grab them. 

West of the Big Top entrance is a discarded clown mask and a caged-in passage for animals. My gut says that we’ll have to traverse that at some point.

Off to the east is a white wagon, the circus’s main office. The door is locked, but there is a discarded fiberglass pole out front. I grab that too. 

There are signs throughout leading to the “egress”, a famous Barnum gag. An egress is, of course, an exit and not a female egret.

Returning to the main tent, I find that the grandstands have been moved and there is now a gap I can walk through to get under the seats. I discover a ticket in the refuse below. I’m not sure why I don’t have one already since I did just watch the performance. 

While in the Big Top, I try the tightrope walk again. Why? I have no idea. But this time, I drop everything except the fiberglass pole and start to climb. That’s when I notice: the safety net has been removed by the workers. I neglected to pay attention before, but quickly restoring shows that it was just removed by a “roustabout”, a laborer. Crossing it with the pole is easier than I expect and I do not have to use the “lean” command at all. At the top of the far-side platform, I find a child’s helium balloon. I grab that for another ten points.

Leaving the tent, I use my ticket to enter the Midway but it doesn’t work. I check out the ticket from the packaging and discover that I had to poke out one of the holes to specify whether I am male or female. Will that come up later? Does this game have a gendered sequence? I punch out the blue dot and put the ticket in the turnstile and this time it lets me through. Once on the Midway, I spot the detective getting drunk on the job. He’s been binging on that “cure-all” that the feelies advertise, an 18% alcohol concoction. I don’t think Duffy would do that!

My map at the end of this post. Not a ton of rooms.

That gives me access to a few more places:

A menagerie where an elephant blocks my way east, plus a locked cage to the west. I can also scoot around the elephant’s tent to find another locked cage. I can hear that the elephant is chained up and unhappy. 

“Jennifer’s Boudoir” which is Andrew Jenny’s trailer. Andrew and Jenny are there, two halves of one person. They must have an interesting tailor! There is a spiral staircase leading upstairs but they will not let me through. 

Rimshaw’s tent is north. He looms and looks mysterious at us. 

The Fat Lady is at the eastern end. I grab a stool from her room. I should say “rooms” since she spans two of them. It’s funny, right? She’s also listening to the radio.

With that, I have explored everywhere I can explore. I need to start solving puzzles to proceed. My ticket says that it comes with three free sessions with Rimshaw. I will try there next.

All in all, this is a fun little game but I’m not sure that I “get” it yet. It’s not a time-boxed mystery like the three previous games, but I am not sure exactly what it is. There is the passage of time, but I expect that it is tied to my score. I hope that is the only similarity this game has with Cruise to a Corpse! (My god, I hated that game.) I can’t help but think that a game about the end of magic (Spellbreaker) followed by a game about the sad decline of an art form (Ballyhoo), all while Infocom was preparing for their own end… isn’t a coincidence. Let’s see how this plays out.

Time played: 1 hr 10 min Inventory: stool, clown mask, pole, ticket, gorilla suit, balloon, President Taft, $12.81 Score: 20 of 200 (10%)

Since this is an Introduction post, it’s time to guess the score! The current average score for an Infocom game is 39 points. Since we have never seen O’Neill work before, there’s not much guidance that I can give. Good luck!

Note Regarding Spoilers and Companion Assist Points: There’s a set of rules regarding spoilers and companion assist points. Please read it here before making any comments that could be considered a spoiler in any way. The short of it is that no CAPs will be given for hints or spoilers given in advance of me requiring one. As this is an introduction post, it’s an opportunity for readers to bet 10 CAPs (only if they already have them) that I won’t be able to solve a puzzle without putting in an official Request for Assistance: remember to use ROT13 for betting. If you get it right, you will be rewarded with 50 CAPs in return. It’s also your chance to predict what the final rating will be for the game. Voters can predict whatever score they want, regardless of whether someone else has already chosen it. All correct (or nearest) votes will go into a draw.

source http://reposts.ciathyza.com/missed-classic-67-ballyhoo-1986-introduction/

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