#like the thing that's so funny about it is the sincerity

[ninjakk]

Hey!!

I recently saw someone claim that Wei Wuxian was starved of conversation on his journey to Yiling with Lan Wangji and Wen Ning and so board he needed to chat to people before they ascend the mountain. I hadn't really noticed this until it was mentioned. What do you think of that scene?

I love your meta and fics btw. You use your understanding of the novel in your writing and it's just *chef's kiss*

Hi anon 👋🏻

Personally, I've not seen any comments regarding the above - but we can certainly look at the text in question 😊

Let's take a look at the scene in question:

Several days later, they arrived in Yiling.

The Burial Mounds were less than five kilometers ahead of this small town. Although they didn’t know exactly what awaited them there, Wei Wuxian had a feeling it wasn’t anything good. But Lan Wangji was right by his side, his gait steady, his gaze cool. Wei Wuxian had never been one with any sense of crisis to begin with, and with the way Lan Wangji looked, he was even less likely to get nervous at all.

Passing through the small town of Yiling, he was awash in the sounds of the local accent. It was invigorating and incomparably endearing. While he wasn’t planning on buying anything, he couldn’t help but strike up conversations in the local dialect with the street vendors. Only after he’d had his fill of socializing did he get down to business.

“Hanguang-jun, you remember this town, right?”

7S translation

So the scene opens with WWX gushing over how safe and happy he feels around LWJ. He's just so thankful to have someone by his side, someone he can fully depend on and is there for him, should he need it. This very much echoes his thoughts from when they began their descent from the Cloud Recesses, at the start of their journey here. For someone nearing the place he met such a gruesome end at previously, he seems incredibly content and calm - all thanks to LWJ. So straight away, we are reminded of how WWX feels around the other man. It's there for a reason, to set the scene. WWX is relaxed and enjoying himself because he's with LWJ.

They have just arrived in a city he is very familiar with. It's the place he both lived as an orphan and frequented as a man while residing at the burial mounds. He is surrounded by the accent of his "home" for the first time in over 13 years and it's making him feel sentimental. I also think it's a great parallel between when WWX finally visits Lotus Pier in the coming chapters and how desolate and subdued the place has become since JC became sect leader.

I think the above reaction is very normal considering the emotional impact it obviously had on him. WWX has already stated on numerous occasions that LWJ makes him happy and he enjoys his company, but he's also very sociable and likes to look around markets and chat with vendors - there's even a scene in the novel which states as such and many other examples. Although WWX is running around chatting and exploring the stalls, LWJ is still by his side. Doing so does not subtract from his obvious enjoyment of having LWJ's unwavering presence.

We see more than enough evidence that WWX happily chats to LWJ and that he, in turn, even responds and asks questions also. There seems to be this mind-boggling misconception that LWJ literally doesn't speak, and if he does he's like some caveman that can't communicate effectively, when it's the exact opposite. LWJ talks when necessary and is very succinct with his words - he's a true gentleman of their time. Of course, in comparison to WWX, he's much less chatty - but when he does talk it's sincere and relevant. WWX loves this about him! He's also an incredible listener and doesn't miss a single thing WWX says, which WWX also appreciates! Hardly anyone listens to all his ramblings and holds them all so dearly!

It's funny, because although WWX chats to anyone and everyone, it's obvious he enjoys conversing with LWJ the most. He treasures the fact they are on the same wavelength and understand each other implicitly 🥰

Aww! Thank you so much anon! I'm glad you are enjoying my meta and fics ❤️

I hope I managed to answer your question! Have a lovely day 😘

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wei wuxian #lan wangji #wangxian #mdzs novel #anon ask #answered ask

[drunkenskunk]

Welcome to another Drunk Skunk™ rant!

So.

I've had some time to sit and stew on the Fallout show, and I think I've finally figured out exactly what I want to say. Because kids? I got Opinions™ about this fucking series. I sincerely wish I didn't have all these Opinions™, because that would almost certainly cause me significantly less stress.

But here we are.

The Fallout show annoys me, but not for the reasons you think.

Let's get the good out of the way first. And by "good" I mean "damning with faint praise."

The Fallout show, as a piece of entertainment and experienced in a vacuum with no prior knowledge or context of the rest of the series or any of the other video games, is... fine. It's an entertaining television show. It's not great, but it's not terrible. It's okay.

The best part of the show is, unquestionably, Walton Goggins. Which is probably the coldest take here, everyone agrees that he's fantastic in this. And it's true! Granted, he doesn't look nearly as gnarly as he should, as the makeup is really giving Ryan Reynolds Deadpool Hugo Weaving Red Skull vibes, but I can honestly give that a pass. He steals every single scene he's in. He has all the best lines. Plus, all the pre-war flashbacks with him are excellent. That first scene when the bombs drop is fucking harrowing.

SPEAKING OF THE BOMBS!

The big reveal that Vault Tec were the ones to kickstart the apocalypse. My initial gut reaction to that was... Not Great. I didn't like it. In fact, I kinda hated it. I thought it was an answer to a question that nobody asked, because nobody cared, because it was never supposed to matter who shot first. The original point was that the end of the world was the inevitable outcome after so many years of war, so many years of stockpiling nuclear weapons, and so many bad decisions from everyone in positions of power on all sides of the conflict.

But the more I think about Vault Tec being the ones to destroy the world... I dunno, the more I... kinda like it? In a fashion. Sort of. As you can see by the remaining length of this fucking rant, I have Complicated Feelings about this!

See, Fallout has never exactly been subtle with its themes, but the show drops all pretense, and openly embraces a staunchly (and honestly, extremely surprising) anti-capitalist narrative.

The Fallout show pulls a Garth Marenghi unironically, and it honestly... kinda works?

Vault Tec were the ones to drop the bombs because they wanted to recreate the world in their image of a capitalist "paradise" free of any and all government regulation. The inevitable end result of the "great game" of capitalism is the literal end of the world, and the capitalists will do everything they can to destroy any attempts to rebuild any civilization not explicitly under their direct control. Because that's what capitalists do: they pursue an ultimately self-destructive goal that is not, and never was, sustainable, and will destroy everything else in their pursuit of endless, infinite, exponential growth, forever. Nothing else matters except Make Number Line Go Up.

Side note: it is extremely funny to me that Bethesda - a hollow shell of greed and excess who have been releasing the same game with different wallpapers over and over again since Oblivion - and Amazon - which is fucking Amazon - bankrolled a show where the villains are greedy capitalists who explicitly destroyed the world because of fiduciary duty to the shareholders. Like... guys, you do realize you two are Vault Tec in this scenario, right?

Ah well. That's capitalist realism for ya.

Anyway, the more I think about it, the more sense it makes that Vault Tec were the ones to drop the bombs.

HOWEVER.

Maybe this is just me being a cynical, drunken asshole here, but... it feels like this was a decision that was made, not because it was the best way to take the narrative, but instead as a means of enforcing the Status Quo of Bethesda Fallout.

See, the thing I liked about the west coast Fallout games was that it showed a world ravaged by the apocalypse, but it also showed that world beginning to heal. 200 years after The End, and civilization was returning. It was a natural evolution of things, emphasizing the post part of "post-apocalypse." It showed us a world that really sucked a lot of the time... but also gave us a small sliver of hope that, no matter what nightmares existed after The End, things could - and would - get better, so long as we put in the work to make it better. It was a world that showed us that nothing was ever so broken that it couldn't be repaired. We just had to fucking EARN that happy ending.

Bethesda Fallout, on the other hand, is just Wacky Wasteland Adventure Time. They are not interested in showing a world evolving or changing or growing, they just want a blasted hellscape that looks like it was freshly nuked yesterday. Why? Because that's the surface-level Aesthetic of Fallout. That is what is recognizable. And Aesthetic is all they know how to do. That's the mother fucking Brand.

Doing something different would risk changing the Brand, and if that kind of change happens, then it's no longer easily marketable. So they just keep with what's familiar: freshly irradiated hellscapes, caps as currency, makeshift weapons, psychotic raiders with no purpose or goals beyond Fuck You, and more of the fucking Brotherhood of Steel. It's all the stuff we remember, so we can point at the screen and go "I recognize that!" instead of allowing the setting to evolve and creating something new.

And that's what annoys me the most. Because even though Vault Tec destroying the world in 2077 makes a certain amount of sense, it also feels like it only exists as a means of artificially enforcing the status quo of the setting. Which means that nothing will ever matter in Fallout ever again. It doesn't matter what happens, or what changes in the future, or who wins the next ideological conflict between the same factions that keep reappearing over and over again like radroaches. Because whenever something strays too far from the established setting, Vault Tec (or, more accurately, Bethesda) is just going to nuke it again, like what happened to Shady Sands.

And, y'know, Shady Sands getting nuked like that really does rankle. Not because I ever had any attachment to the NCR, but because destroying it in the way that they did just felt so fucking lazy. If they wanted to get rid of the NCR, there were easily half a dozen other things they could've done that would've made far more sense. The NCR was a fantastically corrupt government, making the same mistakes as the same governments that (up until the show) were responsible for destroying the world. California was running out of food and clean drinking water because of gross negligence and mismanagement, public unrest was high because of excessive taxation and the "stop tolls" of corrupt border guards shaking down people, and both the military and bureaucracy of the NCR was spread fucking paper-thin, due to their policies of violent imperialist expansionism trying to take far more territory than they could reasonably hold, far more quickly than they could ever manage.

And did any of that matter? No. Not at all. Pursuing any of those plot threads would've required the writers to actually come up with some new ideas. So, instead, it was destroyed because of a cryogenically frozen Vault Tec middle manager with family problems. It was such a fucking lazy solution to a problem that should never have existed in the first place. It felt like the Fallout equivalent of "Somehow, Palpatine has returned."

That's why this show annoys me so much. Because this show that exists without subtlety or subtext, is telling us, to our face:

Don't hope for a better future, because it will never come. The world of Fallout is a destroyed, irradiated hellscape, entirely devoid of hope, and it will never, ever change, ever again.

Because that's the Fallout Brand, and that's what fucking sells.

#drunk skunk rant #Fallout #fallout show #fallout tv show #fallout show spoilers #it took me three hours to write this #what the hell am I doing with my life

[britneyshakespeare]

i don’t see what the point is in remaking the room

#like the thing that's so funny about it is the sincerity #the commitment and surreality of how bad the writing is #it's also just completely silly #you can't make something like the room on purpose #but props to tommy wiseau for managing to profit so hard off of irony cringe movie bros #i hope he's sittin cozy #text post #i like the room i think it's fun but i once knew some guys who were. just a little too into it. if you know what i mean #no you probably don't. they had worse personalities than just innocently enjoying a meme movie a lot #but in retrospect the way they embraced irony with such an... ironic... sincerity #it was reflected in other ways that they just could not be genuine in their interactions w people unless they thought they could play it off #as a joke. and i mean. in situations that were far far far worse than enjoying a movie. #okay yeah ive said enough #there's nothing toxic inherently about the room i like the room #i hate fateful findings though. neil breen isn't funny to me at all. #i have this whole thesis on how the room is a good bad movie and fateful findings is a bad bad movie #i'll save it for another day

[resident-gay-bitch]

little rich boy sirius who gets disowned and can barely survive without his expensive brands and the basic human need to eat at least once a day meeting the entirely too generous james potter who just falls for the vanity and sincerity of the reformed rich boy and decides that once sirius stops caring about brands and status and rich boy things and just cares about what matters in life he decides to spoil his boyfriend to pieces because he’s secretly sitting on a fucking fortune

#idk i just think it’s funny #like james would find sirius when he’s struggling with money because he’s so bad at saving and prioritising his spendings because he’s never #had too before and so james would teach him how to do all that stuff and emotionally support sirius through it all and sirius just falls in #love with this beautiful guy who’s just so generous and who teaches him so many things and finds value in kindness and sincerity and #compassion and all that jazz and james falls in love with sirius helplessly because he might be stuck up and vein and kind of selfish and #is stuck up and cares all too much about status but he’s trying so hard to be better and he finds empathy because sirius got kicked out for #the worst reasons because he’s always been the black sheep of his highly cultist christian family or whatver and he’s also outwardly queer #and james decides that he wants to give sirius everything and loves the way he looks in expensive makeup and designer faux fur coats and #heels and divine jewellery and all that jazz but makes sirius sell it all and learn what it means to be human and not rely on money and #status and brands and stuff and sirius learns what it’s like to be decent and in touch with humanity and only then does james take sirius on #a surprise luxury holiday for his birthday or something and then just buys him thousands of dollars worth of all these glamorous looking #things and sirius is like omg what the fuck jamie and then he just becomes sirius’ sugar daddy because he can’t help himself but they’re #also in love and much better people because of it and when sirius buys things now it’s not because of brands or because they have big price #tags like he used too. he now buys things with james’ credit card he keeps in his own wallet because he thinks he’ll feel pretty in them or #because he thinks james will loose it if he sees sirius walking around in it or if he sees a really cute toaster that sends him into a #frenzy that has him spending all way too much on an impromptu kitchen renovation but james doesn’t care because as long as his boyfriend is #happy and actually paying attention to the price of things and calculating the best value and taking james’ opinion as well and just being #happy and safe and accepted in his new home and family here with his jamie #please i think they’d be so cute ugh!!! #prongsfoot #bambibelle #drabble #fic idea #marauders #james potter #sirius black #jay talks

[welcometogrouchland]

The fact that no one across all of DC fandom (as far as I can tell) has mined the beautiful comedic potential that is the night and day difference between Tim and Damians current canonical love interests

#ramblings of a lunatic #things i know about bernard: he's bi. he's into cooking. he's an endless source of love and positivity in tims life #and however you feel about that as a writing decision #you gotta admit it'd be funny to imagine him pulling up to the wayne family get together (I'm not looking at gotham war rn- #-for comedic reasons) and he sees damian's scary russian goth gf who keeps making oblique jokes about death #and they both just look at each other like. ah. hello #bc despite it all they have one thing in common and that's their deranged autistic vigilante boyfriends #idk I'm so interested in the potential for daminika to be hilarious (and on a more sincere note- meaningful and cute) together #and just Nika in general? she's fun to read rn but my brain keeps supplying me for potential routes for development you could take her #but keeping it strictly in funny territory? i want this. i think it'd be hilarious #Tim and Damian have to agree to not bite/punch/kick/torment each other for ONE day bc their beloveds are hitting it off so well #dc comics #timber #daminika #gravebird #I've also seen gravebird used and i think that's cute! i don't acknowledge flamian tho. who is that

[irrigos]

bad news: im at it again

#just remembered this image lol #if you're wondering why i keep bringing up my communist theory studies #and joking about how everyone probably hates it and finds it exhausting #even though no one has ever expressed. any opinion about it whatsoever #its because i am genuinely and sincerely embarrassed #and framing it like its a quirky affectation instead of just. my irrepressible autism way #feels a little better i guess #if its a funny bit or if its a thing im doing to spite the haters then at least it's something im doing on purpose yknow? #so if someone could please get Big Mad about the communism that would really help support my premise thanks

[danmeichael]

both ad lib lovers and the summer hikaru died to something really interesting wherein they take typical genre conventions and set-ups of BL and place them into a genre other than romance, while still portraying the romantic undertones. where the summer hikaru died does this with horror, ad lib lovers does this with comedy.

as opposed to hikaru's focus on horror, in ad lib lovers, jealousy, desire, and a fear of inadequacy and loving someone more than they love you is portrayed through the lens of improv. this accurately depicts that having a crush on someone as an adult is humiliating.

#not fandom #the summer hikaru died #sokuseki ad lib lovers #is it weird i could talk a lot about how well executed ad lib lovers is #like OF COURSE i can talk about the summer hikaru died and horror as an allegory for queer coming of age #but ad lib lovers seems significantly less narratively dense on the surface but is (in my opinion) so perfectly executed #the mix of diagetic and non-diagetic comedy is so fantastic and both are executed really well #it's also INCREDIBLY grounded in a way a lot of manga focused on comedy really aren't #oh my god stop talking this was supposed to be a joke post oH MY GOD #it truly feels like two guys trying to be funny. i believe that their act is funny in-universe #as well as finding the non-diagetic jokes that are for you the viewer really funny. #reframing common BL tropes for couples getting together as them getting their COMEDY DUO together #while also doing a really good job of developing a very sincere (if goofy) romance just outside the boundaries of the cliche works so well #i think there is a tendency to undervalue the effort that goes into making comedy work #comedy is seen as the lowest common denominator #but this is a manga that is just mechanically incredibly well executed on top of being really enjoyable #in my opinion idk #AND ANOTHER THING another thing these works share is societal. #horror and comedy are two places that queerness was historically allowed to exist in media mostly unquestioned #you are allowed to be queer if you're the butt of the joke #you're allowed to be queer if you're the monster. #in this way that makes them such a poetic canvas to explore a genuine and sincere love story between same-sex characters

[july-19th-club]

harrykim and tomparis hopelessly awkward in the cafeteria what social blunders will the commit!!

#tom just discovered he has a crush on his buddy who is basically married and he's like . oh my god i can never let her know #oh my god she's right there harry what do i do. ignore her right #and harry is like. shit eating grin. you wouldnt want to be RUDE #i actually think the tom kes neelix thing is so funny because neelix has zero to worry about #his girlfriend who was one years old when they met is hopelessly in love with his jealous ugly ass #but tom paris is a perfectly nice handsome humanoid man . and it's LOGICAL that since he and kes are already buddies #something might spring up between them . but the thing that springs up is neelix's obnoxious emasculation #tom himself is being a completely dogged gentleman about the whole problem and is like. well sensible really #oh i would never interfere in a friend's relationship. plus our lifespans aren't compatible and i like being friends #like it's very funny how little neelix has to worry and how sincerely he's determined to make his unfounded fear everyone's problem #star trek #star trek: voyager #q

[yugiohz]

it’s really funny seeing how you were like ambivalent about posting about bakugou and dekus relationship at first and now you are drawing them as kids in so many scenarios it’s honestly really cute

I didn’t expect myself to get invested in the main duo this far into the story but here we are!!!

#They are so silly and cute and real to me #I find ut a bit funny that some ppl genuinely expect more and like sth gay to happen before it ends #not because I would mind it but like why is the current canon not enough for you it is so sincere </3 #one thing about horikoshi he knows how two 16yo boys would communicate their love for each other #anyway yeah hihi #asks

[sciderman]

ok I know it was like a day or two ago but whoever sent in that ask about Bojack has me rewatching it, I'm on season 4 which is my personal favourite, which seasons your favourite? Any specific episode you like?

man! i really, really need to rewatch it to tell you which seasons i liked best, but i remember i kind of really consistently liked it. i even love the first few episodes of the first season, even though i know public consensus says they're not the best - i kind of just, immediately liked the show. i like that maybe the first episodes were a little lighter and goofier so it eased you into the heavier stuff. and that - characters that seemed light and goofy get extra dimensionality and flaws and baggage and damage as the show progresses. i think just - start to finish, it was really strong, and some select episodes were complete masterpieces. complete masterpieces.

i think i especially love the more experimental episodes - i did a reanimate project for the underwater episode, which is just - a delight of visual storytelling. i love when animation forgoes dialogue and completely leans into visuals. just - i love it. i love it. not that the dialogue isn't brilliant in bojack, because it really is. but even when they don't have dialogue, it's still brilliant.

i think the episode that leapt to mind immediately though is – the stupid piece of shit episode. i just - i think about it all the time. i just - i love being in bojack's head, i love the different animation style, i love the frantic, brutal nature of it. there's just this honesty in bojack that i just - i haven't seen anywhere else. when you see mental health being tackled in other media it's so often so - so sensationalised or demonised or simplified into some evil that needs to be overcome, but bojack just - i don't know. it's so honest about the brain. and that it's not - it's not just one guy who's suffering. it's everyone. it's you, it's me. i just. man. i really loved this show and what it did. i think it's something special.

i think i love media where mental health isn't just a problem exclusive to one bad egg, but like, it's normal. we all have that voice.

#sci speaks #i've kind of had a resounding response from a lot of people about my writing in that #oh i must hate these characters because why would i make them do bad things and say bad things if it wasn't because #oh i want to make them the bad guy #people hate that i make spider-man and deadpool be assholes and do asshole things that hurt people. but #i don't know. bojack is like #one of my favourite pieces of media of all time. i love this sincere #honest kind of writing #that doesn't shy from ugly truths. #and it's funny how it's one of my favourite pieces of media #but i'm afraid to recommend it to people because it's not easy to enjoy. #i guess it's with my writing too. i can't fault people for not liking it #because sometimes it's not easy to enjoy. #but i don't know - this is the kind of writing i love and the kind of thing that stays with me #and i love it so much more than anything sugary-sweet and simplified and easily palatable #i know that's personal tastes. i've apologised for it before #but - it's what i'm interested in writing and it's what i'm interested in reading. #that's just what i'm into. and i should always be honest about that #i think bojack has more merit than most media i've seen #even if i know it's difficult to recommend #and i know the majority of people won't enjoy it. #i want to see more ugly brains that aren't wicked or evil #but just - we all have self-destructive tendencies and... #and we can talk about it. because talking about it might be the only way to recognise those faults in yourself #and understand them #and forgive yourself for them #and make a step towards something better.

[itspileofgoodthings]

okay but Taylor’s prologue made me cry.

#it’s actually the first time (or one of at least!) where I feel like she’s put some of her own power into words really accurately #I love all of Taylor’s writing because it’s sincere and because it’s her #but her non-songwriting writing has always been fairly standard to me #sweet. sometimes funny. sometimes clever. but generally presenting some truth that’s fairly obvious #ljke even her midnights intro. go out searching for ourselves. twisting in our self-made cages #yeah yeah yeah #(the cages. we’ve all seen ‘em) #just rarely tapping into the truth of things the way her music does #so I was SHOOK when she started talking about the pressure she faced after fearless #and how she responded to it #like !!!!!!!! Omg there it is. the steel and the power that made her such a compelling force so early #and there it is!!!!! how deeply the criticisms about everything but especially her voice and her songwriting cut her open #also this re-recording project is so interesting because she CAN be more honest #first go around her MO was always to present things as positively and as graciously as she could while still making her points #but this lays all those parts of herself she worked to master and present in the best light bare #and I love to see it! #taylor swift #speak now (taylor’s version)

[dogwhizzer]

straight men really fascinate me. why do they love being gay with each other

#like it starts in middle school with bits but it evolves as they near their mid 20s. it grows more. not sincere exactly #but something like that. does it have to do with the limitations on platonic affection that they're allowed to express? #at least in comparison to women? they can't hug or hold hands so they have to kiss and talk about sucking each others dicks 'for the bit' #or does it simply stem from some sort of weird evolved form of homophobia? Gay Men Funny? #it really is interesting to me i want to study them like bugs #idk. im queer and autistic and trans and don't Get Things and sometimes i'll watch the guys in men's choir interact #and other times i'll watch supermega. as i am right now #id really like other's opinion on this because i think i genuinely want to write something about it. #garfs barfs

[mister13eyond]

tbh a large chunk of my affection for vin & my characterization for him comes from the overdone idea that a character who is morally grey/does not have a moral compass/has little empathy for humans and thinks of them as pretty much toys MUST be dark, troubled, threatening, or otherwise made scary- like. i see lots of "this immortal has lost touch with their humanity & it's made them distant, ethereal, stricken with ennui and dissatisfied" but like

dude there is SO much shit to do in the world. losing touch with your humanity blah blah, having no morals seeing humans as playthings whatever- can't someone be doing that and having a Fucking Blast? i just love an immortal, dream-eating demon who acts like he is at fucking disneyland every day, he's thrilled in equal part to experience the gruesome reality of a nightmare and also to pick up a new hobby- all stimuli is good stimuli, all experiences are good experiences, he loves feeling things! he loves feeling terror or sorrow or grief or loneliness by getting to join in on a nightmare or a dream of someone lost or a dream of isolation. It's so COOL and FUN, humans have such rich little lives, aww!

#i think he occupies the same moral space as the lamb from COTL to me #like #he's not good. he's DEFINITELY not good. but he's also just literally not operating on human moral standards. he is literally just here to- #have fun #people who choose immoral or cruel options in video games aren't doing it to be broody or dark or melancholy most of the time #it's usually because it's Funny and you know you Can do bad things in this controlled environment without feeling bad about it #that's vin #it just so happens that humans are about as meaningful to him as video game characters #(sometimes possible to get very attached to and feel sincerely affectionate of but ultimately not like... a REAL person since they'll - #disappear when you turn the game off (or in the case of humans #when their tiny little lifespans run out)) #ok enough oc hot takes #my ocs #my oc #vin #vinegyaru #headcanons #character thoughts #i just love making a character whose primary motivation is 'have fun' but is Not constrained by morals #he just wants to have fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[floral-hex]

My therapist asked if I dressed ironically and I had to assure him that no, I just really like florals

#he said I wear a lot of flowery clothes and ‘funny shirts’ #which I mean I don’t even wear a ton of florals. just like a flowery shirt or pair of pants #but I mean… plants look nice. flowers look nice. flowers… pretty #and ‘funny shirts’??? that just hurts #I’ve only worn band shirt and dress shirts. today was a kind of cute Godzilla shirt but I’m not doing it to be ironic #I’m too old to like things ironically #just let me be cringe with sincerity #tbf I’d just told him I’d been goth in high school and I guess he thought that carried over and was me trying to get people’s attention #and I mean I guess a lot of people pick their outfits with some idea of public perception in mind #so I don’t think it’s unreasonable to imagine how others would perceive me #but I dress like a boring dad a lot of the time. not anything exciting #I swear I’m still goth inside. I promise I’m still a spooky boy. but the kind of spooky boy that wears shorts w/ the occasional polo shirt🤷🏻 #oh god… I’m a sellout 😣 #we were talking about how self conscious I am and how I hate possibly being viewed as this big grumpy looking dude #but whatever we’ve all got problems pppssssshawwww #and I dunno… this is too much talking for a dumb text post #whoops #you can ignore this #text

[deiscension]

I'm so entirely serious when I say SQX is perhaps one of the biggest failguys I've ever come across. Just, objectively a failgirl. Cannot be saved cannot save and never was safe girl. Girl who cries for help and then realizes she should've tried harder to help herself, should've never gotten help, and if you try to step forward and help now she won't let you. Not in any way that gives her a foot forward. You are a child and you try to take your brother some food and you trip and spill everything and the monster is back because you are the food, silly thing. And it shouldn't have been anyone but you, except it's already been everyone but you, and now you're alone and as it turns out you were the hungry monster that ate up everyone when all you wanted to do was care. And it really shouldn't be about you anymore, let it be about someone else deserving of the pity for once, yet somehow it's always about you. And of course you're scared and hurt but that's already more than you deserve to have. You love and you give and you defend and you are so deeply wrong for believing you have the right to do so freely. You pass tests with flying colors after the timer has long since gone off. It was never your place at the table so why did you eat from it, why did you feed others from it? You can hope and try and try with all you are (which is, admittedly, laughably little even if that laughably little is the richest you have ever been). But no matter what reality you inhabit you're not built to last because it never should've been you. Somehow you manage to miss the point of being fragile, of being undeserving, because still you persist and can't make yourself give up, either. #Failgirl.

#▌ ◈ shi qingxuan ; ⌜ study ⌟ #trying to speedrun lantern rite and it's stirring up a lot of drive to write but i cannot for the life of me think in prose rn #AHASF I SUPER PROMISE THIS ISNT AN SQX PITY POST. I SINCERELY MEAN IT SQX IS SO FAILGUY IT'S NOT FUNNY. #i need to balance the scales and post about all the things sqx is good at WITHOUT the outside ((theft)) help #anyway. anyway. diving into things tomorrow. #like i said not a pity post it's a sheer observation #what i do find pitiable is how capable sqx actually is but how it's consistently squished down and belittled #something something. spoiled princess who's really bad at being a spoiled princess bc spoiled princesses Don't Do All That #also me calling sqx one of the biggest fails i've ever seen is a lot considering ianthe tridentarius exists #(if u know who ianthe is hold your arms open bc i'm about to fling myself into them)