#maggie may header

[evafoxz]

— maggiebrooks headers. 🎸

like/reblog if you save or use.

#the silent waters #the silent waters header #the silent waters headers #elements series #maggiebrooks #maggiebrooks header #maggiebrooks headers #maggie may #maggie may header #brooks tyler #brooks tyler header #booktwt #bookstan #booktwitter #book headers #book quotes #romance books #quote header #brittainy c. cherry

[warriorowan]

the silent waters headers. please like or reblog if you save,

#romance books #books #book header #book headers #book layout #the silent waters #the silent waters headers #brittainy c. cherry #maggiebrooks #maggiebrooks headers #maggie may #brooks tyler #book couples #booktwt #book tumblr #booktt #booktok

[itsgrimeytime]

Magnolia in May (Part Seven) || Rick Grimes (TWD) x Greene!f!reader Regency AU

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...

Taglist: @loliakeoghan23 @belaballs

AVAILABLE ON AO3

Inspiration (in honor of Speak Now Taylor's Version): Enchanted by Taylor Swift.

Summary: Your town was small, not the smallest you knew, but anyone of high fortune was the gossip of the week. Predictably, Richard Grimes was a thing of whispers -rumors of a search for marriage among the grassy hills. You weren't one to buy into town gossip, but something about him... just seemed a little too intriguing.

TWS: kinda anti-Lori, misunderstandings, a marriage of convenience, and mentions of loneliness.

[[A/N: girllllll, not another Magnolia in May chapter!!! Whoops. And actually tagging bestie @imaginemyfavoritefics properly this time, bc I did use the idea of Daryl as the courier. Unrelated but this gif of him clenching his jaw... girl. Thanks for reading !! ]]

You'd taken to writing letters -the gentle swish of your quill was calming the storm of your mind. Originally, you had garnered a sort of cold from the walk in the rain and had to heal -now, you'd stayed holed up of your own accord.

'Nonsense, darling,' Headmistress had said, fluffing up your pillows, '-you must heal from a broken heart like any other wound.'

It was fewer letters and more of a sort of journal -only for your eyes to see but sometimes addressed to someone other than yourself. It started simply with one occasionally to Maggie to make her smile, or Beth to tell her things you'd learned so she wouldn't have to, or to remind Father to eat a meal when he'd been so focused on a patient that he'd neglect himself. But then, Mr. Grimes started appearing at the header.

You couldn't remember the first time it had happened, days rather blurred after that day -especially since you were treated shortly after. And rest was all you'd really gotten then, it made the passage of time blurry.

But it became something you were rather dependent on.

'Mr. Grimes,' you wrote in the first of its kind, quill rather fluid at this stage.

'I met your wife, Lori. She's a wonderful woman, kind and perfectly poised. I would, in a different life, maybe be friends with her -seems the type to be good company. Was it always her?

You've got something special, a family with beautiful children. It's every man's dream, is it not? You were my dream. I find it a bit hard to believe she would leave that dream behind. For what is more powerful than one's love for their child? I suppose there were other circumstances that I shall never be aware of. I would've liked to have known why. I understand it's a rather personal thing, but I should be urged to hear something of the full story. I might deserve it.

But I suppose you deserve a full family more. Carl and Judith do. I wouldn't fit in. I would love the best for them, despite not having known Carl, he seems a bright boy. Deserves much of the best in life, I'd garner all children do.

I often wonder if I am to have children. I suppose I could ask you for advice one day, if so. But there's something in me that speaks differently. Like that path with you is gone. Maybe I should run off to the city and write away, become focused on my education. Pay for my father's living, and house my sister's 'til they're wed.

I don't think I could, with good conscience, leave Alexandria. I'm far too fond of the people the town, its where I grew up. And I suppose, to keep my father's clinic running under the family name I may marry. I'm not too sure that I'd marry for love, per say. Can you begin the fall in love more than once? Is it possible? And furthermore, although it is something I wish for, I'm not sure that I would like to bring children into a loveless marriage.

This is getting far too detailed of my own troubles, and for that I apologize.

I truly wish your family well. Even if there's no room for me.

Yours Sincerely,

Y/N Greene'

It was a positive experience, mostly. The smearing on that letter particularly wasn't of cathartic tears. Not quite a release of the emotions dying so tightly within your soul, it was rather grief. Loss of a life that you'd never have. Despite it being the one you desperately wanted.

You sighed, stashing away the paper with the other ones -the second desk drawer to the right, under the math textbook that had been gathering dust even before you were born.

Sure, it messed your hands, but you found it was a small price to be paid for secrecy.

"Y/N, dearest," your Headmistress hummed -voice pounding up the stairs, "-get dressed and meet me at the door in 10, will you?"

"Yes, Headmistress," you echoed, off to your feet and only touching up ever-so-slightly by the mirror. And in your rush, maybe you had forgotten to shut the drawer -you couldn't know now. It stayed open, and the telling corner of dustless papers under a dusty book was certainly one to ponder over.

At least for someone, it was.

You wouldn't know what had occurred until a few weeks later, as you sorted out your joint closet with Maggie. Gathering bows and ribbons, and straightening dresses, was a wonderful way to pass time -since your newest book was seeming to be tucked away in the carriage. You truly could not find it anywhere-

And then, there was a knock at the door.

Now, normally, this was of no notice -either for Maggie (who had gone on frequent outings with Mr. Rhee since the ball) or Father (ranging anywhere from an old friend to an urgent patient). But this was one to put a pause in your mind.

Maggie was, in fact, out -you remembered the shimmer of the carriage as it pulled away, and Father was rushed off for an emergency. And even further, Headmistress and Beth had gone out to a sort of gathering -some sort of tea party, you'd assumed. (They'd invited you, but you'd truly not wished to hear the gossip. Especially not now.)

You stilled, you were alone here then.

Well, you considered -making your way down the steps, -could be a sort of delivery. Ms. Elisa did frequently speak with friends out of town -often through letters. And Father always had an extra copy of cases delivered to his home -so he could think properly on an issue.

Satisfied with that, you approached the door with newfound confidence -fear that had stubbornly stuck there was unfounded. You twisted a bit of fabric in your dress, just to do something with your hands before swinging open the door.

And, it was a familiar face. Not one you had a name to, but one you knew -the courier.

"Ms. Greene," he spoke, his voice gruff and tired, much less peppy than you'd seen him before, "-I assume?"

"Yes," you answered cautiously, "-I'm the eldest Ms. Greene, why? If you're looking for Maggie-"

"No," he answered, simply, long hair moving with the motion of his head, "-Mr. Grimes requested this be given to you, the eldest."

"I can't acce-" you started but fell shut as a letter was extended to you -two letters. One a familiar sort of coffee-tinged brown -paper old and weary, you could hardly believe the quill hadn't punctured right through really. And the other, neatly folded, a pristine sort of ivory, and dark ink that somehow didn't seem to smudge at all. On the side that was exposed to you was written: Ms. Y/N Greene, in handwriting you recognized.

The one that had scribbled across the invitation so long ago-

"Who are you?" you questioned -eagerly bringing the letters close to your chest, "-And how did you get my letter? Have you been in my home-"

"Ms. Greene," he spoke -composed and calm, unmoved by your pressing questions, "-they were presented to me to mail weeks ago."

You froze, something heavy dropping in your stomach, "They? How... How many letters were you given to post?"

"A stack, no more than 10," he responded, "-the youngest Ms. Greene, opened the door for me once to deliver an invitation. The same one I 'ave been for weeks- It ain't relevant, really. She knew where I came from, and requested I bring 'em to Mr. Grimes immediately."

You paused, "An invitation?"

"More like a summonin'," he clarified, rather poised but still somewhat a bit casual, "-it's always the same request for you, the eldest, to attend to the Grimes estate."

"What?"

He paused, "It's supposed to be brought to ya, upon retrieval but... I'd guess it hasn't."

"You've-" you exhaled -a deep uncertain exhale, "-Just how long have you been delivering these?"

"Lost count."

"And-" you stuttered, a bit overwhelmed, "-and the letters, my letters they-"

"I put 'em in his hand, myself," he spoke -an ordered sort of discipline heavy in his tone with a dose of familiar twang.

"Right," you swallowed -pushing down the nerves biting up your throat at such rampant pace, he was never to see those, "-and who are you exactly?"

"Grimes estate courier," he grumbled out, a some of bitterness gathered there.

"No, no," you quirked a brow at him, "-your name? I figured as much otherwise."

He answered, rather improperly -as if he was trained in some ways and ignorant in others just slightly, "-Daryl Dixon."

"Mr. Dixon," you echoed, a sort of curiosity in your tone, "-you said he received the full stack, did he not?"

He merely nodded.

"Well, why do I only have one, then?"

The man pondered it for a second, loosely eyeing the way you held the letters like he knew what they contained (maybe he did), "I suppose he ain't done replyin' to the others."

The rest of the interaction was fairly polite, mere questions about his work -to which he complained quite vividly about the extent of it, but never shred a wrong light on Mr. Grimes. You'd gathered they were well-acquainted, even perhaps friends from youth, but you couldn't exactly pinpoint it. He didn't say anything directly, and was rather quiet around details. Well, details pertaining to Mr. Grimes, you supposed.

You'd initially wanted to search for the invitations he spoke of, but something bigger was biting you.

Your hands were quick to rush to the drawer, pulling it open -to suddenly believe it was not real. To prove that all of this was a farce, that the letters were still safely kept. But, when you opened it, you could tell.

Even still, you pushed forward holding up the book, peering underneath. It was empty, extraordinarily empty.

"No, no, no-" you urged, heart sinking to the bottom of your stomach -heavy, "-it can't be..."

Private pieces of you, of your sadness, your longing- Sent to the married man of the header.

And just back as you pushed back in your chair, the brush of tears only a breath away -your eyes caught on the letter.

It was not yours.

Yours sat just beside it, you recognized it to be the first one -all sort of crumpled and agonizingly smudged. All conflicted feelings and harsh realities buzzing under your skin. You'd written it partially under the delirium of your illness, so it was rather brash but you'd never thought you'd need to worry about it. The only thing different was how it was presented.

You remember hastily shoving it away, between book covers, under table legs, hidden in the dirt of the garden, as you tried to find a good place to stash them. You'd always been so quick to put them away, to get out the feelings and move on-

Looking at it now, though, the worn paper was smoothed out (to the best it could be) and perfectly folded. Each corner matched to another and creases were indented lightly so as to not damage the written word. It was treated as precious. Something... Something he'd rather cared for.

Something told you then to get rid of it, to throw it onto the fire when no one was looking, to stash it away, to never read it no matter the cost because you were doing the right thing and should not be swayed-

But another part of you was dreadfully curious. And dreadfully grieving the loss of a man who still lived.

It was your mail, a letter addressed to you. Wouldn't it be rather rude to not read it? If you hadn't wished the first one to be mailed, you retorted, then no.

And yet, you found yourself picking up the note with the gentlest of graces. Carefully unfolding the thick paper, slowly, timidly, like the words would jump off the page. Like they could hurt you.

You supposed they could.

Once fully opened, you didn't directly focus on the words -instead, detailing the printed bits around the top edges. It looked as though this was an official sort of paper -the same kind an invitation may be extended to. As well as a family seal printed into the bottom right corner, it seemed a little formal for the occasion but you found it didn't bother you. Not really.

Taking a deep breath, you blinked your eyes -wishing to calm your heart, even just for a moment, and started reading.

'Ms. Greene,' it started, letters crisply written in a thin but precise sort of writing. Your finger naturally went to trace over them, dotting the i's and swirling the g's.

'I must first say that it's to my understanding that these letters are rather personal to you. You weren't the one who intended to mail them, I've come to know. I know that this then, by proxy, is a large invasion of your privacy.

And I can only hope you forgive me for such a thing. Because this is my sort of last resort to reach you. I'm sure you're familiar with the invitations that have flooded your door, and although, I understand the no response for what you know, I've become quite desperate.

To be completely clear, I was nearly on my horse to your home the morning these letters arrived. To explain everything as you deserve it to be explained.

I instead am here, writing letters. I cannot tell if that's any sort of better than my original plan was but it is the decision I chose.

In terms of Lori, the situation is rather complicated. Surely, at the young age we married, she was the plan. I'd honestly not given thought to the fact that she'd ever come back. I knew her reasons, and I fully doubted I'd ever see her again. And out of respect for you, I wish for the full story to be in person.

Despite all that, I truly wished she would. I know I did. If not only to see our children, to grace me with some sort of company.

I lived a rather lonely life before you Ms. Greene. Which may seem a bit arbitrary coming from a man with a staff, but it doesn't make it any less the truth. When she left, it was quite the scandal. I never spoke a word on it, too devastated to even imagine what to say. It meant much more reclusion, even from friends I knew from youth. And then, as I'm sure you're familiar, I decided to move back to Alexandria. Atlanta only harbored negative things, and I wished for someplace more pleasant. And it was, but still despite it all, the loneliness persisted.

So this family, this full family, you speak of, it's not what Lori and I would be. It wasn't what we were when we were married. I love my children, beyond belief, but I was still lonely. And I can't imagine a full family has a lonely father.

Frankly, Ms. Greene, I was lonely until that day in the marketplace.

And on the off chance you don't understand what I mean, I ask, from the depths of my heart, don't leave Alexandria.

Yours,

Richard Grimes'

#rick grimes #rick grimes x reader #its griming time #stuff n' thangs #rick grimes x you #rick grimes x y/n #ricky dicky doo dah grimes #twd #twd rick #rick grimes x y/n fanfiction #rick grimes oneshot #magnolia in may #narrative letters ??? drama

[trulybetty]

Sunday | Week In Review VI

A bit of a slow week this week - nothing much really happened. Got some writing done, announced some things I'm working on and worked on my TBR list. Odd week as my notifications just disappeared and felt a little disconnected. Things seem to be back on track *fingers crossed* - so lets get on with this weeks review...

Truly Betty Updates This Week…

Strings Part V Mood Board

Salt Water Soft Launch

Autumnal Offerings

Fics I Enjoyed This Week…

How Good It Is (Benny Miller) by @wildemaven Fully on the Benny train, this scratched the itch this week with this delightfully wonderful piece of fluff with a delightful touch of spice and I can't wait to get more insights to this couple's relationship.

A Safe Haven Drabble (Joel Miller) by @darkroastjoel You don’t have to have read the series to appreciate the angst in this small little drabble that packs a punch. Explores Joel’s feelings on the impending arrival of Tommy’s child with the grief of missing Sarah and it manages to do it all in less than 600 words beautifully. 

Your Hand In Mine (Joel Miller) by @thelightsandtheroses This is a great opening to a new series and it's such a great opening premise that will have you wanting to find out what happens next and in eager anticipation of what is to come next.

Open Mic Night (Marcus Pike) by @secretelephanttattoo No denying it anymore, I’m ankle-deep in this Pike Puddle and this is an excellent example of what keeps me content with damp *ahem* feet… Are you one of those who forgot it's canon that Marcus was a part of a band? This one-shot is here to remind you with a bang!

Clouds (Joel Miller) by @softlyspector This is incredibly soft with a few hard edges - allusions to events from TLOU2, but no spoilers and no golfing. Highly recommend a read of this.

Little Monsters (Dieter Bravo) by @chronically-ghosted Dad Dieter was not the trope I thought I needed, but here we are and I can’t get enough. This is all what I picture Dieter as a father being like. This is equal parts fluff with equal parts spice which makes for a delightful read! 

For the Night (Agent Ortega) by @ladamedusoif I think the pilot hit the web for all of a couple of hours before we were blessed with this delight. As far as I am concerned this is what the pilot should have been, it’s deliciously raunchy and I may have read it several times. 

Delta Landscaping | Chapter 5 (Triple Frontier Boys) by @rhoorl I don’t know if I still have words for my thots feelings on this update to this series. So please accept this gif and go get caught up, and if you've not read it? What are you waiting for?

Spinning in the Rain (Frankie Morales) by @frenchiereading This is like the best kind of fluff, it's atmospheric, it's indulgent, it's sweet and it's Frankie - what more can you ask for? Oh, and it's based off a song that I already adored and this makes for one to go back to for re-read.

All I Need (Frankie Morales) by @frenchiereading Mel has such a way with these perfect snippets of fluff and romance that make your heart swell and this is another example of this. I can't do it justice, you just need to read it to experience it!

Exposed (Ezra) by @maggiemayhemnj This was a delightful debut and a great read that flowed just as well as Ezra's poetic prose, which Maggie manages to capture perfectly. If you are a fan of Prospect and Ezra, you will not be disappointed!

Personal Day (Marcus Pike) by @sin-djarin If I'm staying in the puddle, I'm going to make sure it's in good company with fanfics like this one! If Marcus Pike is going to ask me to come back to bed for five more minutes, who am I to deny the man?

Shared Breaths | Chapter 9 (Frankie Morales) by @frenchiereading It's a triple header here for @frenchiereading! The slow burn of the first eight chapters pays off with a bang here and, it does not disappoint! If you're late to the game like I am on this excellent story, I very much recommend jumping in because it does not disappoint!

Posts I Enjoyed This Week…

The thots were truly alive and well on this Narcos gifset. I don't think the image of this post is burned into the back of my eyelids. Also, might have prompted some non-Narcos writing somewhere in the WIP pile...

Thoughts on the contents of the Delta Landscaping Yelp page? We got you here!

@goodwithcheese's book recommendations! I'm off this week and hoping to get some reading done between parental activities.

Things I’ve Enjoyed This Week…

I got four episodes deep on Wrestlers, a Netflix original docu-series on OVW, a Wrestling farm out of Florida that was once where the WWE sent its superstars to cut their teeth before making their debut. I once upon a time was a big WWE fan, so this has been an interesting watch. I'd recommend it too even if you're not a wrestling fan as there are some interesting stories from both those who run it and those who live it.

This Week’s Song…

On a N'Sync kick this week with the rumours that they're going to be reuniting for more than just the Trolls 3 soundtrack/movie. I will be feral if the rumour of a reunion tour materializes!

Happy Sunday all! Here's to a great week ahead!

B 💕 x

#betty's sunday in review #Spotify

[fundielicious-simblr]

Bonus!

I finally bit the bullet and did an updated group photo for gen 3 because I wanted to replace the header I have for this account right now. I'm still stuck on what to do for a profile picture, but I'll figure it out eventually I guess. When planning out the posing for this, I was inspired by @duggardata to do some info points for my sims, so I'm going to be doing some basic and random facts about these little bunches of pixels to end the year. This ended up being a mini thesis, so grab a snack if you plan on scrolling down, and I'll put the post under the cut to save your scrolling the TL. When I started this it was meant to be a small cute post with random information, and has now become an actual analysis. If I've missed anything or if i find more that I can talk about, there definitely can be more of these later down the line.

I'm going to queue this for 11:30pm my timezone, so I wish you all a very happy new year, may you get everything you desire and more!

This is all 36 people that make up the 3rd generation. I've arranged them in birth order, so this is technically chronological I guess. I did mess up when I got to the end because I forgot about Ashton (Allan & Casandra's 13th - the irony 😂) and plopped her further down than she should be.

Names L-R:

Back: Adalynn Leonard, Barrett Collins, Macie Collins, Carter Paulson, Abbey Hill, Brittany Dahlmann, Zoe Moreno, Valentina Townsend, Alan Paulson, Tanner Collins, Maggie Wright, Celeste Paulson.

Middle: Kyra Shearer, Reece Collins, Kristyn Crocker, Sabrina Crawford, Beckett Collins, Amira Eichelburg, Priscilla Roberts, Annette Collins, Jarrod Paulson, James Hunt, Charles Collins, Zachary Paulson.

Front: Rory Godwin, Ruby Rae Godwin, Parker Collins, Ava Grace Godwin, Conner Paulson, Jarrett Paulson, Gabriela Hunt, James Lee Collins, Matthew Collins, Ashton Collins, Amelia Godwin, Archie Collins.

Now onto the stats!

Basics

Out of the 36 :-

Men: 17

Women: 19

The split between men and women is 49/51 (don't quote me on my maths, I dropped maths classes as soon as I was able to 😂) Within the siblings groups it's definitely not as even, though the final results even themselves out. Gender roles are heavily enforced in these households, so ones that are female heavy (Allan and Casandra's 8 girls to 5 boys) compared to those that are male heavy (Claire and Ryan's 6 boys to 4 girls) will have different experiences. Having girls being born earlier in the birth order definitely helps lighten the load when there's a new children every other year.

Marriage

Marriage is definitely a stage of life that fundies emphasise for their kids, with purity culture pushing for them to be married as soon as possible to (A) prevent sin and (B) produce children as fast as possible. Of course, there's those for whom marriage doesn't happen at the desired time, but in times like this the advice is to wait "on the Lord's timing".

For those eligible for marriage out of the 36:

21 are married

1 is engaged

1 is in a courtship

The average age for marriage is 22. The youngest age being 18 (Maggie, Reece, Priscilla) and the oldest being 29 (Abbey)

I don't have exact data for the courtships so I can't do an average, but I can say the longest relationship prior to engagement was Abbey and Adam's - they dated for two years before getting engaged.

Speaking of dating, fundies and many other conservative christians push courting rather than dating. They reason that it's more serious and with the purpose of marriage, and if you add in purity culture there's the argument that they're saving 'pieces of their heart' for their future spouse. Out of the 23 couples who are either married or on their way there, only 2 couples kissed before marriage: Abbey & Adam and Brittany & Colton. These two couples weren't held to as strict standards as their cousins due to their parents outlook on things, they already knew that their daughters didn't personally agree with the convictions on purity (plus with brittany marrying into a well known political family, they saw it as a means to an end 😂) The other 19 couples (soon to be 20) saved their first kiss for the altar, as will the one courting couple (Zachary & Kelsey). Only 3 couples had no touch courtships the whole way through (and this number is debatable because I myself couldn't keep a storyline straight hehe - but from the character personalities and different plotlines let's agree with 3): Reece & Stacie, Alan & Tessa, and Tanner & Tabitha. In all 3 cases it was the girls family that set the stricter rules, which is more common as girls are engineered to guard their purity.

As if common with real life fundies, the older the kids get the faster they get in courtships that end in marriage. This is one of that things that you can't really predict since people's stories are different, Adalynn was the first one to get married 13 years ago, and the next family wedding was Barrett's 3 years later. In the first 9 years since the 3rd generation started getting married, 8 couples were married. The beginning of the next decade is when things started to happen in a flurry, 5 couples got married with four of them having their first child in the same year (this wont make sense, but if i try to make it fit real world parameters i'll acc go insane HAHA - this is fictional so it's allowed not to make sense) The most couples to get married in a year is 7 couples, and with the 13 left I doubt that there will be the same back to back that was happening earlier. The girls have gotten married faster than the boys, but that was to be expected when you consider that gender roles play heavily into fundie culture. It's easier to marry off a daughter to be a wife and mother than having to marry of a son, she will be provided for but he needs to be in the place where he can provide for a family that has the potential to grow exponentially. Obviously because this is a game where reality is suspended, the men in the game don't have to do much to be providers.

Education

Education is important as it shapes a person's thoughts and opinions, therefore fundies are more than likely to homeschool their children so that they are in control of what their child is exposed to. For those who think total at home education isn't where the Lord is leading them, there are other options available such as a homeschool co-op and private christian schools, with the last resort being the public education system.

The 2nd generation are quite diverse with their belief systems, influencing their thoughts and opinions around how they educated their children - and let's be honest, finances do play a certain role here whether you like it or not.

Allan & Casandra - Casandra totally homeschooled all 13 of their children through K-12.

Branden & Lea - Lea homeschooled their 3 children from kindergarten through to grade 8, and for high school the kids attended a private christian school.

Claire and Ryan - Claire totally homeschooled/currently homeschools their 10 children.

Danielle and Sebastian - Danielle totally homeschooled/homeschools their two children.

Elaine and Taylor - Elaine homeschooled/homeschools their 5 children through a homeschool co-op that she taught at prior to having children. The kids are educated by various teachers that specialise in different subjects using an approved curriculum.

Fletcher and Cara - They've chosen to send their son to a private christian K-12 school.

Grayson and Keira - Keira homeschools the kids until they're in grade 8, then they send the kids to a private christian school for high school.

When it comes to university, fundies definitely don't push it onto their children as they see it as a place where they'd be brainwashed. As the times have changed, there have been more and more conservative christian universities that have opened up that cater to fundies, so there are more fundies getting a tertiary education.

Right now there are only 8 out of the 36 sims that have gotten degrees or are actively pursuing them:

Beckett - He's the only one of his siblings to attach themselves to a university, even if his degree was in Bible & Missions at a very conservative bible college. His siblings' skill sets are either self taught or they were mentored by someone, though his sister Amira is doing an associates degree at some point (I just haven't figured out in what yet).

Abbey - She has an distinguished degree in biology and currently works as a marine biologist. I sent her and her sister to the in game university and physically sent them to classes and everything (which is something I'm never doing again HAHA). Back then I also didn't have the thought to send them to a christian university, so let's pretend she just skipped everything evolutionary for her degree.

Brittany - She has a distinguished degree in communications and worked as a political commentator before getting married. She and her sister were the first girls to go to university from their cohort (as well as the first to not be homeschooled), especially since they're in the first phase of the 3rd generation when the 'vibe' in their extended family was very conservative.

Tanner - He has his MD and is now working as a doctor (using the in-game university mechanics) he was also the first boy to attend a secular university, but there obviously weren't as many opinions on him doing it than on his sisters doing it.

James - He has his degree in Bible Counselling with a focus on Youth and Ministry from a local bible college in his area. It was a two year degree to help create missionaries that could be sent out to help churches. He met his wife whilst at university and they married as soon as they graduated, they now live in henley on Bagley as missionaries assigned to help grow a church there. His sister Gabriella doesn't know what she wants to do (i also have no clue), so that will be revealed in due time.

Kyra - She got her degree in early education and is now a kindergarten teacher at a private christian school, she even met her husband at the school through his niblings. Her mother (Elaine) being a teacher and her father also being college educated was definitely an inspiration to her. Being educated in a homeschool co-op also helped her realise her love of teaching.

Rory - Rory is currently at a local university getting a law degree (for my game i'm using a mix of education systems, incase you get confused) and is currently enjoying it. He initially wanted to join the police force like his uncle and cousin, but decided on enrolling in university instead. His parent's are encouraging him down the political route, but with a law degree he can do anything.

Ruby Rae - She's currently in nursing school and is enjoying learning the curriculum. In my head she's always been that character that I'd send off to nursing school, especially with her uncle marrying a nurse, it just felt meant to be for her character. I initially envisioned one of allan and casandra's girls maybe going to nursing school too, but in the end it didn't pan out.

The only ones I can say are definitely attending college in some form are James Lee (Fletcher), Matthew and Archie (Grayson). They'll be like their parents and go to fairly conservative universities and go on to live your average fundie-lite conservative life.

Children

CW: There will be mentions of pregnancy, problems with getting and staying pregnant, pregnancy loss, and infertility of various kinds.

Fundies think of children as gifts from God, with many taking that ideology and running with it, usually ending up with children in the double digits if their fertility agrees with it. The notion of being 'quiverfull' implies that a couple don't use any methods of contraception, with the idea that if God wants them to have a child then they will conceive and birth one. 6 couples of the 2nd generation (Allan to Elaine, then Grayson) were all open to whatever kids the Lord would give them, and they ended up with a variety of children - one couple having 13 and another having just 2. Life throws various curveballs, or as they say "the Lord works in mysterious ways", so there can be many plans that don't work out - let's not forget that people's fertility isn't always textbook. Casandra had 2 miscarriages that I didn't plan in game, the mod I have gets triggered by certain conditions and the alert was a surprise to me. I don't roll for pregnancy losses, unless difficulties getting and/or staying pregnant are part of that character's story for whatever reason e.g. Madelynn, Stacie, etc.

Out of the 21 married couples, only 4 don't have children: Abbey & Adam, Beckett & Mandy, James & Emma, and the newlyweds Parker and Lana.

Abbey and Adam - They're not quiverfull so they've got a timeline for when they'll have children, but they definitely want them.

Beckett and Mandy - They've been married for around 4 years and have not yet had children, they're marked as a quiverfull couple so they're not preventing pregnancy, there's just no children as of yet. Honestly speaking, I haven't thought that far about the ways that children appear in their storyline but I have 3-4 options about where things could go.

James and Emma - These two are in the same boat as Beckett and Mandy in terms of their views on children, they want them but haven't 'been blessed' with them yet. In the actual game they're side characters, so I let the 'Neighbourhood Stories' take over their story unless I see it necessary to intervene.

Parker and Lana - They're newlyweds, so there could be a pregnancy announcement from them any day now. Though I have taken real life parameters into consideration with how fast a couple does conceive, since in real life it can take the average 'healthy' couple up to a year to get pregnant. So you'll just have to wait and see when Lana will be posting a sonogram 😂

Of the 17 couples that have children, they have birthed a whopping 50 children that make up the ever growing 4th generation. There are currently only 2 pregnant women that are gestating 3 children, which is I think the lowest to ever happen by holiday season. The speed at which they have children has definitely sped up the more couples get married. When Adalynn got married in 2010, she had cousins still being born, so for the first five years (2010 - 2015) the 10 grandchildren that were born came from her, Barrett, and Valentina (let's not forget that Kyleigh had triplets then twins back to back, so she went from zero to five children in 3 years)

The 10 children born in the 4 years after that are from Adalynn, Barrett, Carter, Valentina, and Brittany. The next 3 years (2020-2023; i use years to count so i don't get lost, but I make it a point not to mention years in the posts cause that adds opportunities for confusion 😂) were a wedding and baby boom, bringing us to the present day. 2020 had 5 couples marry and birth four children, 2021 holds the record for the most weddings and the most children born: 7 couples married and there were 12 children born. 2023 isn't finished in the game, but so far there has been 1 couple married with another set to marry at the end of the year. So far in 2023 there have been 5 children born, and the pregnancies that are in game aren't set to give birth this year so that's the number for that year.

With all these births happening in waves essentially, how fast are these sims multiplying? In true duggardata fashion I've got the intervals ready for you:

Adalynn & Mason - 9 children in 13 years of marriage: 7 singletons and 1 pair of twins, 8 boys and 1 girl.

Skills

Fundies are known to have their kids learn a skills, usually in the form of musical instruments. From my own childhood as well as research I've gathered via many hours of watching and reading, a musical instrument is the best thing to learn as the 'easiest' way to glorify God is through music. Music plays an important role in worship services, and so having children that can play instruments well allows for them to 'be of use' for worship; families also capitalise on said talent and travel around playing music as a ministry.

The skillset of the 2nd generation does play a role into how their children ended up:

Allan worked as a carpenter (and by carpenter i mean he reached level 10 of the woodworking skill and would just make things to sell) whilst being a Pastor, before retiring and working as a Pastor fulltime. He didn't learn how to play an instrument as he was focused on learning a skill that would help provide for a family.

Branden found his skills in writing, he worked as a writer in the writer field and wrote books that now provide him with royalties, like his brother, he wasn't enrolled in music lessons as his parents had other priorities set for him.

Claire was enrolled in music lessons and found she had a real skills for playing the piano as well as writing music, her mother also had her and her sisters learn homemaking skills such as gardening, cooking, balancing a checkbook and how to run a household. Claire put being a wife and mother first, but also continues to use her skills to minister for the Lord. She's become well known for her performance as well as her hymnal music arrangements (think Kim Collingsworth-esque vibe) and also teaches music as various music camps from time to time.

Danielle learnt how to play the violin as well as learning how to be a homemaker, and as she got married later in life she was the person who stepped in to run the house after her mother passed. She uses her skills whenever asked, like playing at church or at various worship events, but she's mainly focused on gardening and baking.

Elaine learnt how to play the piano and used to play at church and various events, but found her joy was in teaching. She took over homeschooling her younger siblings and went on to earn her teaching qualifications.

Fletcher was taught the piano by his older sisters, but lessons weren't pushed on him by his parents. He went on to focus on fitness and joined the police force after finishing highschool.

Grayson was more book focused and didn't learn an instrument, similar to Elaine he focused more on books and studying and ended up going to medical school.

Harley is the youngest girl and learnt how to play the guitar as a girl, as she was the youngest she didn't have to perform as often as the older siblings did. She went on to get a degree in Fine Arts and now works as the editor in chief at San Myshuno's biggest fashion magasine.

It's easiest to display the information based on the sibling order from gen 2, so here's the list of the various skillsets of the 3rd generation:

A -

Casandra being your typical conservative fundie woman, made sure that all the kids got music lessons, whatever she couldn't teach herself she found someone to teach them. Piano: Since Casandra plays the piano she taught the kids until they were in their teens, then if they chose to continue they could get lessons with Claira. Adalynn, Macie, Zoe, Beckett, Charles and Ashton chose to learn the piano and so far Zoe is the only one who has taken that and made it a career of sorts like her aunt Claire. Violin: Macie also chose to learn violin, with Amira, Priscilla, and Annette also learning the violin. Guitar: The boys mostly chose to learn the guitar, Barrett, Reece, and Parker all chose the guitar, with Maggie being the only girl to choose to learn the guitar. Of the 13 kids to learn a musical instrument, only Zoe has taken it and made it something that monetarily supports her.

B -

Lea learned how to play piano growing up, and enrolled all three of her children in piano lessons. Abbey, Brittany, and Tanner all had piano lessons until they were in their teens and focused on different extracurricular activities once they joined the private christian school.

C -

Claire made sure all her children know an instrument, the four girls (Valentina, Celeste, Kristyn, Sabrina) all know both the piano and the violin, with the 6 boys all learning piano and Carter and Alan also learning how to play the guitar. There were many suggestions of them starting a family band, but Claire and Ryan didn't feel that the Lord was leading them in that direction.

D -

Both James and Emma have learnt to play the piano, James' wife Emma can play the piano, violin, and the flute and has her degree (from a biblical college) in music with a focus on worship music.

E -

Elaine put all the kids into either piano or violin lessons, Kyra did lessons in both until she was a teenager, Rory did piano until he was a teenager, Ruby Rae did violin lessons and still plays at church, Ava Grace continues to play Piano, and Amelia still does violin lessons.

F -

Fletcher and Cara put their son into organised sports, so no music lessons this side.

G -

Keira wanted her boys to have some musical knowledge, so Matthew does guitar lessons and Archie does piano lessons.

That's all I've got for now, but as I was doing this I definitely found more things that I could write about in a few months. I hope you enjoy this!

#fundie sims #fundiesims #quiverfull sims #quiver full sims #collins family #collins legacy #sims 4 legacy #modest sims #homeschool sims #gen 3 #deep dive #analysis #character analysis #post #this was definitely something that started small and next thing i know i've written SECTIONS #i truly had to stop myself because this was was already too much #gen 3 misc #i had to ro RESEARCH on some of the things i was saying cause i had forgotten my damn self

[caseadilla111]

speirs x oc

a/n : another little piece I've been working on, still very rusty and I don’t have a title for this yet so apologies for the less than creative header. I don't have a lot of time to write fan fiction or stories anymore so it's been nice flexing my amateur author muscles the past few days. this is going to be a hefty story, lots of words (like multiple pages worth) so I'll post them in chapters. anyway, enjoy <3

softy Speirs, I like to think he's a classic romantic from the 40s.

*disclaimer: this story is about Speirs as a FICTIONAL character, not the real man himself. any personal back story is fictional besides his place of birth, age, and war history (only WWII). This is NOT a fan fiction of Ronald Speirs, the real veteran war hero. This is based on Matthew Settle's portrayal in Band of Brothers.*

oOoOoOoOo

He sat alone at the bar like he always did nearly every night, but unlike the other regulars at the establishment, he only ever enjoyed a whiskey or two, nursing them for the hours he was there. Ronald Speirs wasn’t the type to drown his sorrows and get piss drunk to block out the memories. He’d rather sit with them, think a bit, and soothe the aches that came with each sip. He was quiet, never people watched, never reacted to the music that played. He just stared at the glass in front of him clenching his jaw every so often. Beautiful women frequented old McCullough’s Pub, dancing and twirling their skirts on swing night when the band was really getting into it, but they never were a distraction for the grizzled and war-torn veteran sitting on his stool.

That is, until she walked through those doors.

Maggie wasn’t one for going out all of the time like her friends Lena and Cecilia, but tonight was a special night. Maggie just graduated college and was home for good now. Lena practically begged her to come out tonight to celebrate, but it was really a ploy to get out and meet some impressionable young men who could be their husbands if they played their cards right. Maggie had been to McCullough’s a few times before, popping in here and there when she’d be home for the holidays, and every time she came, she saw that familiar face, sitting alone on the bar, cradling the whiskey glass in his tense hands.

Lena made it a point to grab the first man she fancied and dragged him to the dance floor, shooting Maggie a look encouraging her to do the same. Cecilia, however, was much more mellow than Lena was. The two shared a glance and laughed at their very enthusiastic friend being swung around the small dance floor as they enjoyed their drinks. Eventually, Cecilia’s beau joined them at the pub and Maggie was now alone at their table. She sipped at her beer, watching, and laughing over the music at her two best friends dancing the night away, only to have her gaze stray over to her right and land on the lone man sitting at the bar. He never once looked up or moved from his seat. Not even when he heard the cackling of laughter coming from the dance floor or the cacophony of noise from the live band. Maggie did notice, however, he would flinch here and there any time a glass dropped from behind the bar or a door slammed shut somewhere in the back.

Perhaps driven by liquid courage, her curiosity, or just plain boredom of watching her friends dancing with their men, Maggie took her beer and made her way toward the man at the bar. She placed her half full glass one seat away from him before she spoke. “May I?” Her sweet voice seemed to shake the man from his trance a bit, he blinked a few times before turning to her, stunned for a moment before muttering a “yeah, sure.” Maggie sat, a single barstool separating them, and she brought her glass to her lips, hoping this next sip will bring her enough moxie to do what she normally wouldn’t have done and hour or so ago. “So, what are you celebrating?” She smiled, waiting for him to smile back and joyfully answer, only to be let down with reality. Ron scoffed and looked at her for a moment before answering. “Life.” He watched as her smile began to fade ever so slightly and he felt a pang of regret with his harshness.

“What are…what are you celebrating?” He awkwardly asked, clearing his through in the middle of it hoping to shake the foul mood he seemed to radiate to the other patrons of the pub that he was not previously aware of prior to this encounter. Maggie’s smile returned slightly, maybe this wasn’t a bad idea after all. “I graduated.” She answered cheerfully, and she saw a curious expression come across his face. “College, I graduated college!” Relief now replaced the curiosity in Ron, Maggie giggled at the obvious worry that was hanging in the air for a moment. “Well, here’s to you graduating.” Ron raised his glass and gestured it toward the young woman beside him, and she raised her glass in return to him. “And to celebrating your life!” Ron raised his eyebrows and shook his head slightly, knowing they should not be celebrating his life, or at least the events that made up his life.

A few moments of silence filled the space between them before Maggie decided to speak up again. Typically, she didn't have to try this hard to pull a conversation from a man. She was a fairly attractive young woman and was easy to talk to, why was this so difficult? “So, do you co—” Ron rolled his eyes and cut her off before she could finish.

“Listen, kid—" “Maggie.” “Maggie." He said with a bit of an attitude. "I’m not really one for small talk, okay? That’s great you graduated and all, congrats, you know, hip hip hooray, I can buy you a drink if that’s what you want but please, spare me.” Ron finally spat out, only to feel immense guilt at the words he just let vomit out of his mouth as he saw the expression on the young woman's face in front of him change. She looked like a maimed dog, helpless, big sad eyes, the light escaping them as soon as he shot her down. She shrunk in on herself, finishing her beer in a gulp, glancing at the dance floor almost willing the song to be over so she can go talk to her friends about the jerk at the bar.

Ron was kicking himself. You asshole. Are you allergic to compassion? He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before signaling for the bar tender. “Hey, ki—Maggie, I…I’m sorry. That was—” “Rude.” “Rude is a bit kinder than what I would have said but yes, rude. I’m sorry. I just, I’m not used to the small talk. I come here to just sort of, you know, relax.” The bar tender was now in front of Ron and was drying his hands on the front of his stained apron. “Can I get a uh, a beer, you still want beer?” He looked at Maggie now, and to her surprise he was buying her a drink. “Oh please, you don’t have to.” “Yeah, I do. One beer please and uh, I’ll take another.” He tapped his nearly empty glass with his knuckle and the bar keep was off to fulfill the order.

The drinks were slid in front of them now and Maggie graciously took her glass, the golden ale brimming the crystal in her hands. “Thank you, uh…” she struggled to place a name to the face in front of her, probably because no name was ever given to her before during their awkward and hostile exchange. “Ron. And it’s my pleasure. Really kid, congrats on graduating, that’s a big feat not many can achieve. Here’s to you.” He raised his new glass and Maggie met it in the middle of the space between them with hers, clinking them together ever so slightly.

“I’m sorry for that…outburst…I typically just keep to myself here so, not used to the chit chat.” Ron looked down into the amber liquid in front of him, hoping to find better words to carry a conversation somewhere deep in his glass. Maggie gave a toothless grin, not entirely sure what to say to make this awkward exchange less so. Ron could feel the tension he created with his outburst and attempted to ease it, though he was out of practice with this sort of conversation with people, let alone with a beautiful young broad like herself.

“What did you get your degree in?” He brought his glass to his lips and sipped as he watched her now, taking in the woman seated with him, he didn’t take a moment before to really look at her but the way the warm light from the bar illuminated her features was mesmerizing, her hair was almost a burning golden hue with the reflection of the light on her curly brown tresses, almost like the halos shrouding the Saints he saw in the churches over there in Europe.

“History, bachelors in history.” Maggie licked the foam of her beer from her lips as she answered, nodding her head after while trying to think of a return question for Ron only for him to beat her to it. “So what now?” “Uh, I think I’ll teach.” “Really? Wow, smart girl then, huh?” Ron was actually impressed, but he sure had a way of showing it. It was as if his brain and vocal cords were working against him here. But Maggie laughed a bit, easing Ron of any worry of insult he may have inflicted on her unintentionally by calling her a smart girl as if she were a child.

As the night went on and the drinks were flowing for Maggie, the two began to get along just fine. So fine to the point Maggie had forgotten she had come to the pub with her two girl friends, who now were watching their friend like a hawk from their table, their beaus hovering over them like two protective lions.

Ron started loosening up after talking with her for a few minutes, smiling his signature Ronald Speirs smile, laughing every so often and the jokes she said and asking questions when he could. The mood had made a complete turn from what it was when this young, funny, intelligent woman sat a barstool away from the hardened war hero.

Their conversation was cut short however when Lena and Cecilia came over, Lena clearing her throat to draw Maggie’s attention from Ron to her friends now. “It’s late, we should get going Maggie.” Maggie looked at the watch on her wrist, gasping for a moment when she realized just how long she and the solitary man were chatting for. “It is late…” she frowned toward Ron and he shot her a solemn toothless smirk, nodding his head in agreement and closing his eyes briefly. “It was great meeting you Ron, I had a wonderful time.” Maggie extended a hand to Ron, to which he grasped with his and gave her a firm shake. “Likewise.” He smiled this time, a real Captain Ronald “Sparky” Speirs smile, and he could have sworn he saw her blush. “Okay you two, let’s go.” Cecelia laughed and grabbed Maggie’s free hand, almost dragging her away from the bar and away from Ron. He watched as Maggie faded away with the night when a thought crossed his mind. Maybe it’s too late, did I miss it? No. Go, you idiot!

Ron turned hoping to see them still in the pub but the ladies and their two chaperones were already out the door. Ron hesitated, calculating his next move like he always does, and threw down some cash onto the bar before hastily leaving the pub. “Maggie!” He called out again once he was outside. Luckily, they hadn’t gotten too far, they weren’t even in the cars yet. Maggie turned to Ron’s voice and smiled before turning back to her friends, who smiled back and shooed her away. “Maggie…” Ron started, a little breathy as his adrenaline was pumping and he practically leapt off of his barstool to catch her. “…I had a good time tonight. Thank you for keeping me company, talking to me.” “Of course, Ron.” Maggie smirked and bowed her head a bit, a loose curl falling onto her forehead before being swept back by the cool summer breeze. “May I see you again?” Ron was a confident man, but something about this young woman humbled him, so much so that he felt like a schoolboy again asking his honey to the dance. There was a pause after he asked, he could almost see the question hanging there between them, in bright red letters, dripping in anticipation. Maggie blushed and self-consciously tucked her auburn locks behind her ear. “I would like that very much so, Ron. Yes.” She smiled and Ron smiled back, he admired the way she looked bathed in the moonlight now. There is no lighting she wouldn’t look good in I bet.

“Oh!” Maggie reached into her handbag and pulled out her pocket pad and pencil, scribbled down a number, tore the page out and handed it to Ron, which he graciously took while simultaneously holding onto her hand. “Call me between 7:30 and 5:15. We eat dinner around 5:30-6 so no phone calls. And I’m free every day except for Sundays.” Ron chuckled at her instructions but nodded, agreeing to the conditions. “Well, it was great meeting you Ron.” “It was great meeting you too, Maggie.” They both paused for a moment, not sure who should make the first move until Maggie decided it would be her who stood on her tip toes and gave Ron a sweet peck on the cheek before turning back to join her friends and head home for the night.Ron stood in the lot, cheek tingling from the kiss, and watched as this remarkable young woman walked away from him. He came to McCullough’s as he did any other night that he couldn’t escape his mind and the memories of who he once was, but he never expected to be revived to his former self tonight by a bright beautiful girl who decided to take a chance on the solitary man sitting on his own at the bar.

#ron speirs #ronald speirs #band of brothers #ronald speirs x oc #speirs x oc #softy speirs #soft speirs

[anistar-amarena]

Bonjour, tout le monde~! You can call me... Amarena. (I hear it's not good to tell people online your real name.) One of my employees just can't stop talking about this Rotomblr app, so I decided to give it a try.

Let's see, what else should I write here...? Oh, yes! My pronouns are he/him! And I'm 34. I run Brasserie Merisier, a restaurant in Anistar City.

I'm the trainer of four lovely Pokémon: Maggie the shiny Murkrow, Mindy the Indeedee, April the shiny Tsareena, and Sugar the Alcremie! (The picture on my card isn't really accurate... Sugar is of the Ruby Swirl variety, and was evolved with a Ribbon Sweet.)

I think that's all for now. À bientôt~!

OOC Info 👇🏻

Hi. This is a blog. It mostly exists to tie in with my other pkmn irl blog's lore, and might go inactive once this character has served his purpose. In the meantime, here's this guy! The profile picture and header are from the Pokémon TCG.

I also run @wanderer-sylvan, this blog belongs to Sylvan's brother. But he hasn't actually said that. It's the pepperoni secret 🤫

All forms of Pelipper and Musharna Mail are active. No magic anons. Any type of character can interact. (Sapient Pokémon, fallers, villains, idc.)

In Amarena's universe, the events of Pokémon X and Y happened less than a year ago.

No high stakes, mild in-character hate okay, possibly occasional suggestive remarks but no NSFW. Mun is an adult but a lot younger than 34, so... depictions of 34-year-old existence may be inaccurate.

#pkmn irl #pokemon irl #rotomblr

[maddiesflame]

The Silent Waters headers

like/reblog if saved © maddiesflame

#headers #the silent waters #brooks griffin #maggie riley #elements series #maggiebrooks #brittainy c cherry #book headers #header #the silent waters headers #maggie may riley #brooks tyler griffin #book header #brittainy c cherry header #brittainy c. cherry #the silent waters header #elements series headers #maggiebrooks header

[steamberrystudio]

23/01/2021

Hey everyone! Time for the last tumblr update of January. It's been a busy two weeks, so here we go!

Summary:

Edited 6-7 CGs

Completed all Jack CGs, all Lance CGs and some Magnus CGs (So about 6 or so CGs completed)

Finished Quill Ch 2

Started revamping the glossary

Sent steam page for review

The Ramble:

First of all - CG edits.

I have been going back to tweak older CGs off and on for a while now and in the past couple of weeks I went back and edited quite a few CGs. In some cases the edits were because I didn't like the CGs, in other cases, I changed the scene up a little and had to make continuity fixes to things like character outfits. My style has shifted a bit since I first started the game as well and there were a few CGs where it was particularly noticeable, so I fixed those as well.

And in one case I noticed I just flat out forgot to shade one character's eyes. So I needed to fix that.

Eventually, even if I'm not totally happy with a CG, I do have to set it down and walk away and wash my hands of it because I cannot reasonably edit CGs forever. At some point a CG has to be "done." Sometimes I get to the point that I can't even tell if I'm fixing anything anymore or if it's flaws in new and exciting ways. LoL

Ultimately though I do want the CGs to be as good as they can be so I do revisit old CGs occasionally and have been doing that a lot in the last couple of weeks.

In addition to that I have completed all of Jack's remaining CGs, all of Lance's CGs and one (and a half) of Maggie's remaining CGs - he has two left to complete. One is about half finished - still need to finish rendering the characters in it.

The other is in a rough sketch state at the moment so the staging and composition are blocked in but I still need to do the final line art and colour it.

Then, of course, both of those have to be recoloured and coded.

Once these two CGs are done that is all of the CGs for the first release.

52 CGs. 8 per love interest + 1 of Morgan and 1 intro CG each for Yuu, Reuben, and Quill.

I have so many regrets (in terms of. . .deciding that this much work was something I could handle. Because it was something I could handle. But just. And with a lot of pain killers. And heat packs. And other treatments to get me through the very real pain I've inflicted upon myself.) But. . .ITS DONE (almost).

Moving on from CGs. . .

I also spent a day working on a new cover art for the game. I was setting up the steam page, which requires approximately 1.1 million images, each one with unique dimensions. (Thanks, I hate it.)

I just realised that using the sprite art really wasn't going to work for these images. I couldn't cram 9 love interests into the various "capsules" and "covers" and banners and headers. . .and Morgan's sprite alone just doesn't really give enough of an idea what this game is like.

So I really needed an image that was more versatile, more interesting than just Morgan's sprite.

So I made that. And then made my 1.1 million images with their annoyingly unique dimensions and uploaded them. And sent the page for review. Steam is always an adventure so we'll see how long it takes to get the page reviewed and set up. (I really just put in the basic information and may try to spruce it up later on. . .)

In regards to actual game development. . .

I have also been working on revamping the glossary screens and writing up some new glossary entries. Finishing the glossary is really going to be the next major thing I try to finish, I think. I still have a lot of other small polishing things (adding in some SFX and stuff) but the glossary is kind of the biggest remaining feature to finish. And I want to spruce it up a bit since what is there right now is. . .functional. But not necessarily what I want to have in the final game.

So that is on the horizon once I finish up the CGs. BUT will probably happen after I implement all the corrections the beta testers have offered up and sent out a new beta version with all the CGs in it so that we can verify they are working correctly.

Lastly, I have done some writing. Not a lot since I'm focused elsewhere, but I did finish Quill's second chapter and have started editing the outline for his third chapter so I can get started on that as well.

So yeah. Busy two weeks. But we are getting there.

Sneak Peeks and Previews:

Upcoming Weeks:

I did want to be done with CGs by the time I posted this but I'm still 1.5 CGs away from completion. I didn't account for - editing a ton of CGs and doing new art for Steam, etc. I will definitely finish up CGs this week.

And then with those out of the way will have to really start focusing on detailed to-do lists so I don't forget any of the small things needing to be done.

Very close. My spreadsheet says we are ~98% of the way there.

#upcoming game #otome #amaregame #english visual novel #oelvn #gilded shadows #updates

[dionnes]

i was tagged by @adrianne-lenker :') thank you! <3

rules: we're snooping in your playlist. put your entire music library on shuffle and list the first 10 songs, then choose 10 victims

shampoo bottles by peach pit

to perth, before border closes by julia acklin

fallingwater by maggie roggers

everything to help you sleep by julien baker

june 14th by lauren lauder

clementine by elliot smith

seven by men i trust

gemini by tash sulatana

i was all over her by salvia palth

you missed my heart by phoebe bridgers

why did you choose your url?

i was obsessed with the song dionne by the japanese house when i got it :)

any side-blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them

i think i had a personal random blog but not anymore-

how long have you been on tumblr?

i first created an account on 2010 so like 11 years?! o.o

do you have a queue tag?

nahh

why did you start your blog in the first place?

just wanted to see content of some celebrities i liked

why did you choose your icon/pfp and header?

i just love phoebe and the vid of julien laughing >>>

whats your post with the most notes?

i think i made like a selena gomez gif of who says... i may have deleted it lol

how many people do you follow?

238

have you ever made a shitpost?

i'm not sure lol so probably not

how often do you use tumblr?

ahhh changes lol if i have shit to do probably

did you ever have a fight/argument with a blog once? who won?

no

how do you feel about 'you need to reblog this post'?

i usually don't reblog them ...

do you like tag games?

yup :')

which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

i have no idea lol

do you have a crush on a mutual?

hahahahaha no but i wish i did

Phone Photo Meme Game

choose one picture from your camera roll without downloading to sum up your personality

anyone who is interested in doing it is tagged!!!!! <33

#thank you for tagging me :')

[bittykimmy13]

Let It Snow (GT Fluff)

Ramona is plagued with troubled thoughts on a snowy winter's day. Will may not be the best with words of comfort, but he is determined to cheer her up.

A gift for my wonderful friend, @marydublin5 / @little-miss-maggie​ ! <3 (who also made the lovely header image!)

Will made it perfectly clear to Ramona that she was going to love what he was working on in the kitchen. The fact that she was so impatient made it more fun for him, if he was being honest. 

He left her in the living room with the TV on to keep her company while he worked—making sure she had her warmest blankets too, considering snow had started falling that morning.

When he paused to check on her, he expected to find her hugging the baseboards on the way to the kitchen to spoil the surprise. But she was exactly where he left her. She wasn’t even looking at the TV, and she didn’t seem to notice he was there, either. Her eyes were fixed at the front window, where snow was falling even more steadily and adding to the white landscape.

By the third time he spotted her like that, he was concerned.

“Ramona?”

She turned to him with a flinch, sitting up straighter on the sofa’s armrest. Blinking, she seemed to come out of a trance. “Oh, hey. What’s up? Is it ready yet?”

“Not even close,” he said.

Normally, she would have groaned and demanded to know exactly how much time until she could eat—and whether he had any snacks for her while she waited. Instead, she offered a distracted smile and a weak attempt to complain.

“Then what are you bothering me for?” She pointed at the kitchen half-heartedly. “Get back to it, chef.”

Will lingered at the doorway, then took careful strides into the living room until he could kneel by the sofa. He folded his arms on the cushion and cocked his head at her. “What’s on your mind?” he asked.

She looked down at her fidgeting hands. “Nothing.”

Sinking into thought, he glanced at the window, where she had been so fixated each time he came to check on her. “Did it snow where you’re from? Do you want to go outside once it settles?”

“No!”

Although he didn’t react outwardly with anything other than a deepened frown, his insides lurched. He tried to catch her eye, leaning closer to the armrest, though she shied away.

“What’s the matter?” he asked.

Ramona pursed her lips, looking from him to the window. “I would’ve died,” she said in a small voice.

Her admission didn’t help his puzzlement, but he remained patient. “What do you mean?”

“I mean… out there. In this weather. I would have died, no matter what. If that thunderstorm hadn’t happened and you hadn’t brought me in, I would have been out there during this.” Her minuscule fingers dug into the fabric of her pants. “I’m so stupid. I thought I was getting the hang of things out there, such a survivalist, and I never stopped to think about snow. If I were still out there, I’d be dead by morning.”

Will let the words sink in. Truth be told, he hadn’t given any thought to what life would be like for either of them if he hadn’t brought her in. “You’re right,” he murmured. “You wouldn’t have made it.”

She snorted a laugh, looking ready to cry. “Geez, Will, you should’ve been a therapist,” she said derisively. “You always know just what to say.”

“What? It’s true.”

But she seemed to have had enough of the truth. She rubbed her eyes and cast another haunted glance out the window. A distant sort of fear etched itself onto her face, as though part of her was actually still out there, tortured by the cold. She even shivered.

Will offered his hand—she looked smaller than ever next to it. “Why don’t you come and help me in the kitchen?”

 “Because you’re super mean and won’t let me see what you’re doing.”

He curled his finger invitingly. “I’ll make an exception today.”

Her shoulders fell with a sigh, and she shook her head. “I think I’ll just take a nap.” Her eyes drifted back over to the frosted window.

His hand inched closer so he could gingerly guide her chin back his way with a fingertip. “I don’t think it’ll be a very good nap if you keep looking out there.” His other hand swept in to scoop her out of her blankets without warning.

“Hey!” She gave a kick at his fingers and scowled up at him as he stood. “Let me mope in peace!”

“Fine. But could you at least do it where you’re not torturing yourself with the window?” He ferried her to the edge of his pocket and held it open. He knew better than to tilt her in, at least offering the option to climb down or decline.

She huffed. For a moment, he thought she would turn him down, but then he felt a tiny tug as she grabbed the lip of his pocket and hoisted herself over. “You’re lucky you’re warm,” she grumbled.

A tiny weight dropped to the bottom of his pocket. After she settled, he peered down while still holding the pocket open. In the shadows, he could see her curled up tight, partially covering her face with her hand—perhaps to catch whatever tears had made it out. 

He hesitated, debating on whether to speak any further on the subject. After a moment, he released the edge of the pocket and headed back to the kitchen with his added passenger. He fully expected her to cheer up and peek out at some point while he worked, but she didn’t. Each time he checked on her, she was curled up in the same position at the bottom of his pocket, fast asleep.

Ramona groaned low in her throat when she felt something prod her from outside the pocket. Burying her face in her hands, she hid her eyes from the light that poured in overhead. “M’still sleeping,” she protested.

“I think you’ll want to wake up for this,” Will’s voice rumbled.

That was when she noticed a delightful scent in the air—cinnamon, ginger, cloves, and sugar. She could take a guess at what he had done, and if she was right, then it was very true that she would want to be awake for it. 

“Fine.” She yawned and stretched her arms overhead, allowing Will to reach in and scoop her out. He had gotten quite good at it in their two months together; she was still working on maintaining an unpanicked heart-rate every time his hands surrounded her.

Sure enough, when he brought her out in the open, there was a fully-assembled gingerbread house waiting on the counter. He had cut holes for the door and windows. The house itself was undecorated, but chocolates, peppermints, frosting, and other sweets were scattered over the counter, ready to adorn the walls and roof.

“You know, you do a terrible job of being as scary as you look,” she told him as he lowered her to the counter. “This is adorable.”

“I never wanted to be scary.”

He reached past her to pluck something up between his finger and thumb. Steam curled from the top of the doll mug as he handed it to her—rich brown hot cocoa. She accepted the mug, unable to hide an endeared smile.

“I know,” she said. “Just teasing.”

She sipped from the mug as she strolled up to the gingerbread house, impressed yet unsurprised to see that it was entirely homemade and scaled right to her size. As far as the careful assembly, she wasn’t shocked in the slightest, either. It didn’t look very different than the birdhouses he built regularly. She peeked through the door’s opening.

“Is it safe to go inside?” she asked.

He shrugged. “As safe as frosting cement can be.”

“If it collapses on me, you’ll be hearing from my lawyer.”

Ramona stepped inside, overwhelmed by the scent of gingerbread. It reminded her of bakeries and sweet shops and cold nights indoors with her friends. Her heart ached and warmed at the same time as she stood in the center of the floor, clutching her drink and looking around.

One of the windows darkened as a single blue eye peeked in at her. “Do you like it?” he asked.

“It looks a little sad,” she said airily. “Let’s make it look as good as it smells.”

He helped her a lot, of course, spreading frosting on the outer walls where she directed him to. She stuck candies and chocolates in careful patterns while Will focused his attention on the roof of the little structure. He got the same intense look in his eyes as when he was crafting something for a client.

“More here,” she said, pointing to a spot by the door. As Will carefully frosted, she ducked under his hand and continued to stick green candies along the base like grass.

When she was satisfied with the outside, she went back into the gingerbread house and gave the interior some much-needed love as well. She moved in and out, calling for Will to leave chocolates and tiny candy canes at the door for her to haul inside. Prematurely, his eye filled the window again to see what she was doing.

She rushed to the window, holding her arms out to block his view. “I’ll tell you when I’m done! Out!”

It was dark outside by the time she had finished framing the windows with colorful candy beads. She paced around to admire her work, then strolled to the door. She could see Will’s shadow moving there, working on something for the front part of the roof.

“Hey, I’m—” Her words cut off in a squeal as a glob of white icing fell on her arm. She looked up to find that Will was making icicles on the edge of the roof. Hurriedly skittering out of the way, she gave him an exasperated look and wiped at the frosting. “If you laugh…”

“I’m not, I’m not.” But a smirk wavered on his lips when he looked right at her, and he needed to avert his eyes.

Gathering the thick glob in one hand, she threw it up at him. It arced in the air and didn’t come close to reaching his face, plopping on the counter a pitiful distance away. She crossed her arms and gave him an expected glare. Taking notice, he diligently swiped the icing on his fingertip and smeared it on his cheek. 

“Happy?” he said, stepping away to tear up a piece of napkin for her.

“Getting there.” 

As she cleaned away the icing, her gaze was drawn to the kitchen window. Though it was dark, the outdoor lights illuminated the snow that was falling even heavier than before. Willow followed her gaze, and then she felt his eyes rest back on her. He folded his arms on the edge of the counter, pulling her attention to him.

“You wouldn’t have died,” he said gently.

She gave a rueful chuckle. “You don’t have to lie. That’s even worse.”

“I’m not lying. You would have lived, I promise.”

“That’s a steep promise. How can you be so sure?”

“Because… I was beginning to suspect there was a trinket out there. Once the snow started falling, I would have gone out to find you. No matter what, you would have ended up safe.”

“What if I had refused?” she asked in a softer voice. “You know how I was at first… I didn’t know what you were like.”

He untucked one arm to reach over and smooth her hair down with a light fingertip. “I would have won you over with the gingerbread house, of course. You wouldn’t have stood a chance the moment you saw it.”

A laugh bubbled up before she could stop it, and against all odds, the shadows that had haunted the corners of her mind that day didn’t feel quite so dark. “Right, nothing to do with you. The only reason I stick around is the food, just so you know.”

“Trust me, I know.”

His hand pulled away from her so that he could break off a piece of gingerbread and pop it into his mouth.

“Hey!” She strode over to put herself between him and house. “I plan to live in this thing until it rots! Stop eating the roof!”

Snickering, he easily reached past her little slapping hands and broke off another piece. Instead of eating it, he offered it to her. “Have a bite, and I don’t think you’ll blame me.”

Begrudgingly, she snatched the piece and took a bite. The flavors that filled her mouth were unlike anything she ever expected to experience as a trinket. Humming happily, she strolled closer to Will to sit with her back against his forearm.

“Fine,” she said. “Keep it coming. Wouldn’t say no to another cup of hot cocoa, either.”

“Of course you wouldn’t.”

#mywriting #gt #gt writing #print universe #trinket universe #giant tiny #giant #tiny #trinket #will #ramona #snow #let it snow #size difference #gingerbread house

[taerseok]

↬ pairing:. badboy!Jungkook × childhoodfriend!Reader

↬ synopsis:. ❝ Nevermind, I’ll find someone like you. I wish nothing but the best for you too. Don’t forget me, I beg. I remember you said; ‘sometimes it lasts in love. But sometimes it hurts instead.’ ❞

Or, alternatively:

↬ synopsis:. ❝ you and a handsome prince from a neighbouring kingdom team up to spin the worst fairytale the lands have ever laid their eyes upon. ❞

↬ word count:. 15.5k

↬ genre(s):. modern royalty!au, fake dating/fake marriage!au, childhood friends!au, angst, fluff, attempted humour

↬ rating:. pg-15

↬ warning(s):. cheating, suicide, language, alcohol, comatose, mental illness, disturbing scenes, rebounds, e.t.c.

↬ playlist:. play here!

▪ note:. this is a part of the royalty!au collab with my good friend, Addison @aesthetical-witch and I was very inspired by Tae’s cover of someone like you to make this!

CREDITS:

• Thank you soo much to Maggie @kimtaehyunq (requested from the BHQ Request Board) for the wonderful header!

• Thank you to my good friends Ruby @rubinora and Addi @aesthetical-witch for helping me edit and providing me with feedback!

Putting your phone next to you, you sigh and turn to lay on your stomach, your cheek against the soft mattress below you. You had just seen an exhausting text message from someone you did not want to meet right now. You’d be lying if you said Jungkook didn’t still get on your nerves for something stupid he did the last time you had a ‘get-together’. The boy, who you were friends with since you both came from a royal background and your kingdoms were basically next to each other, had drunk your last carton of banana milk. 

Naturally, you both had taken a liking to the same drink, and as of currently, most of your ‘wars’ were a result of taking each other’s things and of course, drinking each other’s banana milk. Yes, it is quite idiotic to lose your shit over someone else drinking your milk, but you had every right to be mad at him and more. 

 In the text that he had sent you just a few minutes ago, he asked if you could meet him in your castle’s garden in a few minutes. You were feeling lazy as always, sitting in your bed, doing nothing, but you could not help but snicker that the guy had the audacity to ask you that when he took your banana milk. In fact, you believe he should be treating you, not asking you for any more favours than he already has. What would poor Jungkook do without you, you shake your head.  

Getting up, you take off towards the gardens of your castle. Oh, and it wasn’t much of a castle in your opinion. It did lack some of the things a normal castle would have, like large towers. But you did consider it a mansion. Most called it a castle though, mostly because royal matters were handled here. Or so you thought, anyway, you shrug. You didn’t waste your time and as soon as you got out of your room, you rush down the halls, down the stairs, and through the large doors. 

“Now where is he?” you frown. The garden was larger than one could imagine. In front of the gate to the inside of the ‘castle,’ your mother had decided to have a fountain built, and to the right and left, green, lush grass spread over quite a large chunk of land. You opted to go for the more secretive places. The boy must have driven off without his parents’ knowledge and decided to come here, and as far as you knew, if anyone would have seen him, you would have been informed. 

You looked around, running in the gardens and squinting your eyes at every shadow you saw, then sighing because none of them belonged to Jungkook — they were mostly trees, occasionally some maid working here or there. But you did find the male soon enough. He was hiding at a corner of the garden where bushes surrounded almost every point. If you didn’t know Jungkook good enough, you would have guessed he was smart. 

You run up to him, making sure no one saw you since that would likely be bad news. Whatever it had to be, Jungkook didn’t call you here for something good because it wouldn’t have to be this secretive. “Right,” you catch your breath, panting. “You better tell me something worth it because I feel like I just ran a marathon.” Running around your garden wasn’t easy, in your opinion. It took great will, certainly. “So I was right when I said that you’re just a pillow princess.“ 

You glare at Jungkook, brows furrowed. You had a bad history with him, you won’t lie. Yeah, he appeared to be quite handsome and even charming. Many girls would swoon over his gorgeous hair, his pretty face and his adorable dimples, and you wouldn’t even be surprised if he was ripped as hell. Being royalty and crown prince was just an added bonus, to be honest. But he was a brat with one big ego, and you knew that fact like the back of your hand. 

The way he teased you made blood simmer in your veins. It made you go crazy. You felt beyond helpless when that happened. And you reminded yourself over and over again not to compliment him or his ego would only inflate more. And you considered that wasn’t healthy for him, even though he really did look good. 

“Shut up and tell me what you want.” Maybe it was the fact that he spoke something really true and maybe you were a pillow princess so you wouldn’t even deny it, but it still offended you nonetheless. The nickname had been given to you when he had came over once and your mother had mentioned how you never leave your bed. Your mother really knew how to throw you under the bus, didn’t she? He chuckles, then begins to speak. “I have a request for you,” he says. You stop him right there, raising your hand in the air, gesturing him to kindly shut up. You were so done. “For fuck’s sake, Jeon Jungkook. I am not about to go through hell again just for you. Don’t you think you should act a little more independent, maybe? Maybe treat me to dinner first? I am not a 24/7 helper,” you frown, crossing your arms. 

“Who taught you to curse?” oh. You might have gotten a little too angry. But who could’ve blamed you? Jungkook wasn’t your responsibility. You didn’t have to help him and you wouldn’t this time. You just had to make it clear and may have gone a little too far. You had tried to stop yourself from cursing in front of him so you’d keep your status, but of course, that didn’t mean that you didn’t actually curse. 

“I am an independent adult. I can curse. Meanwhile…” you sigh, “you aren’t. You constantly need help from me. You’re crown prince, Jungkook! You’re supposed to be a little more mature than this.” He didn’t take any time to retort back. “Look who’s speaking. You’re not mature at all,” he says, and though his voice reflected anger, his expression remained calm. 

“We’re not talking of me here! You’re the one who came here with a request!” you exclaim, turning your back to Jungkook. You had enough of helping Jungkook over and over, you were so tired of picking the pieces of his life back up and putting it together. He had to understand that you had a life too. You had your own problems to take care of. Any time he messed up, he’d have to come to you for help. 

Like that one time, when he and some of his friends got drunk and you had to help them clean up even though none of it was your fault. And that one time when he had driven a little too fast when you were over at his ‘castle’ and then he crashed into that one shop in town. And to top off the humiliation, since he was too much of a pretty boy to own up to his mistake, you had to hold a conference to explain the situation to the media and paparazzi. Of all the people, you. 

It was getting ridiculous at this point and your head wouldn’t wrap around it. You knew he was irresponsible and maybe even careless, but still! He was going to become the next king and the kingdom depended on him. The future of his subjects depended on him. How could he risk being so careless? 

“I’m leaving if you have nothing better to say,” you sigh and take a step to leave, but he catches your wrist, pulling you back. You groan. “Jungkook, I’m a person with my own problems. I can’t always be helping you,” you turn around to look in his eyes. You could see stars in them if you gazed deeper. 

“I get it. But I trust you enough to let you know that mother is planning an arranged marriage for me,” your brows furrow at his statement. “What… do you—?”

“But I’m dating someone already.”

Your eyes widen in surprise. You take a moment to let yourself digest the new information. He was dating someone? 

Okay, you two were close but never tried to get into each other’s love lives, and in addition, the man in front of you didn’t look innocent whatsoever, so he must’ve at least dated someone. But for him to tell you like this, it hurt a little.

It reminds you of how you were growing up and leaving your childhoods behind. You two had known each other for quite a long time and gotten so comfortable with one another. But to think that someday, you’ll be standing beside a man and him beside some woman of his liking, and the fact that, that one day was coming very soon — it hurt. It hurt to lose your friend over some stupid thing like marriage. 

“But she’s a commoner. You know mother is strict about that stuff and…” he bit his pink lip, “I need you to buy me some time.” You raise a brow, and his hand finds yours. He looks at you, his eyes searching for confirmation. “You need me to buy you time? How?” you frown, your feelings conflicted. You wanted to help, this was some dire situation and if he got married to someone he didn’t love, then… it wasn’t worth it. 

At the same time, this proved to be very hard. His mother, though a fun one similar to yours, was stern when it came to relationships. Her trust was especially hard to earn. But she did grow affectionate towards you since you had been with Jungkook since you were little. 

“I want you to pretend to be my girlfriend and slow things down a bit.“ 

You look at the man in disbelief, motionless. Did you hear correct? Yes, maybe your mother teased you about being married to Jungkook for some while now, and maybe it did sound reasonable, but why of all people, did he want you? Multiple girls were dying to be his girlfriend already, should he not give them a chance? 

“But why me?” you finally ask, looking at him with mixed feelings. “You’re the only princess my family knows and trusts. It wouldn’t be weird if I was dating you at all.” You roll your eyes at the last statement. “Jungkook, it would be weird if I was dating you,” you correct him. “Well, to you, yeah, but I don’t consider it impossible,” he grins. You pull your hand away from his, punching his arm. 

“You’re dating someone already, you idiot!” you exclaim, frowning. He chuckles. “I’m not cheating on her. I already told her, and she’s not on the best terms with it, but she agrees,” he says. “So you can date me.” You huff at his arrogance, crossing your arms. “You know this is trouble, right?” you furrow your brows. “Yeah, and I’m up for it. So are you up for it?” you roll your eyes at his reply. 

 "I think you just want a chance at fucking me if I’m to be completely honest with you.“ 

“I like your honest side.“ 

“You’re in a relationship!“ 

“With you, yeah.“ 

“Oh my God…” you sigh. You wondered who would date such an idiot. Then again, he is really handsome. Maybe you should be grateful for the opportunity. 

——— 

You didn’t know when you agreed for it, but you just did and now you are dating Jeon Jungkook. You decided to tell your family about it that night at dinner, after discussing the details with Jungkook. Hyun-ae, who is his girlfriend as of currently, was a commoner he had met at an expensive club he had gone to.

She had garnered his interest and the two began dating in secret. They have been now dating for two years, though in private. Neither of them have shown any sign of getting the relationship to a different level, and they both need some time to relax and think of ways to finally bring the truth into the light without any prejudice taking place. 

That is where you come in. You will pretend to be Jungkook’s girlfriend so his mother can stop finding suitors and give him some air to breathe, simultaneously giving him time to think of a plan. You will need to slow down the process as much as you can, making excuses to make sure that the wedding day does not approach. Because in the end, it’s not you who is going to get married to Jungkook. It’s Hyun-ae.

Or that’s what he told you about the plan. 

It was wrong on many levels, and if you weren’t as dear to your families as you were, you both would receive great punishment for it — maybe even death. But it wasn’t going to go that far. It would be done in a few months at most. Or that’s what you told yourself, anyway. 

Taking a seat at the dinner table, you smiled at your mother and father, and then looked towards your cheeky older brother, Seokjin. You liked to call him Jin for short. He is likely going to go ecstatic over the fact that you were dating someone and you didn’t tell him, and going to go absolutely feral when he hears that it is actually Jungkook who you are “dating”. He was quite the overprotective brother. You turn to your father, taking a deep breath, you begin to speak. 

“I wanted to… talk about something important to me,” you try sounding like you are authentic, and you seem to be failing badly, but you keep on going, mustering up all the strength. You forget even eating your food for a while, instead, turning to look at your three family members one by one. 

 "I am dating someone… with whom I want to take my relationship to the next level.“ You were inexperienced and stupid for doing all of this. Multiple times you thought of backing out, but this was for Jungkook. You felt bad seeing how far you were going for him but he never even returned it. Or sometimes he did. But this was a big favor you were being asked. Your mother and father look at you with wide eyes, though Jin continues to eat, making sure to look up at you once in a while — making sure you know he’s listening too. 

“I’m very sorry I didn’t mention him before,” you look at all of them one by one, “but I am in a serious relationship,” it hurt to lie to everyone like this. What fool would fall for your dramatic acting? Who knew… but you certainly had all of their attention now. 

“Who is it…?” your mother asks very quietly, at least they weren’t objecting to it. You sigh heavily. 

“Jungkook.“ 

Their expressions were something you couldn’t analyse. They were thoroughly surprised, yes, and at the same time, another emotion you couldn’t quite grasp — approval? You couldn’t put your finger on it, but maybe that was it. Jin stops eating to look at you instead. 

”Jeon Jungkook? That one Jungkook you’re friends with?” you feel bad for playing like this, but what was done was done and you were doing this for Jungkook. “Which other Jungkook would I know?” you don’t know how exactly to react so you smile lightly at Jin, then look back towards your parents, who are still staring at you. “So… Jungkook recently told me that his mother is picking a girl for him…” you bite your bottom lip, “but she doesn’t know about us and—” you begin to speak, but your mother cuts you off. 

“I’ll talk with her.” And what you don’t expect is the smile that’s on her face. Did you really just fool them like that? They believed you so easily. Was it this easy to lie? It left you with chills. 

“In fact, you and your mother can leave for their kingdom in the morning. Make sure to tell Jungkook about it,” your father spoke up. Everything seemed to be going to plan. Jungkook did say he wanted you to visit the castle and that he’d tell his parents all of this too. So you supposed your job was done. But to think that you were fake-marrying your childhood friend, it all felt so wrong. 

“I will…” you respond quietly and continue to eat dinner as nothing had transpired. You felt so bad for doing all of this. Seeing the smiles on your parents’ faces, the laughter of Jin — they didn’t think it was weird at all for you to marry Jungkook. So he was right. Maybe people could see you and Jungkook together. Childhood sweethearts, mayhaps? You still didn’t know how. 

As soon as you finish dinner, you turn to leave to your room and tell Jungkook about everything. 

[Y/N]: I told everyone. We’re coming tomorrow. 

Your kingdoms were right next to each other. It was very easy to reach to his by car. Yes, it would take some hours but you considered travel fun. And you’d probably fall asleep in the car anyway. You thought about packing your things and decided to do that while you waited for Jungkook’s message. 

 You were done pretty quickly, you didn’t need to pack much. Some clothes here and there, and some other things you thought you’d need. You didn’t know how long you were staying there for, but if anything was needed, you know they could provide it for you at his place. You sank down on the bed and picked up your phone, which lit up while you were closing your bag. He was calling you. 

“What is it now?” you ask, a little annoyed as you put the phone to your ears. “Are you mad because you have to actually work now, pillow princess?” you could practically hear him grinning. It wasn’t very nice. “Be grateful. I’m helping you. No one could do this,” you roll your eyes. He chuckles lightly, changing the topic. “How did your parents believe it though? You’re such a bad actor,” he queried. “Well, I’m not as bad as you think. Somehow. I did make them believe it.“ 

“Jungkook, you know this is trouble. What if they find out…? What if we get into trouble?” you frown, but he doesn’t seem to think of it in that way. You aren’t surprised. “It’s fine! Lighten up, pillow princess.” You huff, feeling anxious about the situation. Your mother and father — even Jin. They would all be so disappointed in you. You helped Jungkook marry a commoner. 

“That’s because you get something good from this if it works out! You get to be with the love of your life while I get scarred forever,” you say hotly before your voice turns meek. You won’t be able to sleep tonight, thinking of all of this and freaking out over it. And Jungkook knows that fact too, knowing you well enough to pick up on it. “I’m sorry. I didn’t think of that.” Of course, he didn’t. 

“Because you’re a self-obsessed bloke,” you reply dryly. He snickers a little, making you smile ever so lightly. “I guess I am. We’re in this together, Y/N. I never want you to be alone.” It was moments like these when you questioned why Jungkook made your heart skip a beat. Or why he even said things like these. Maybe he knew his words mattered a little more to you than you let on. Or perhaps he simply wanted to pull at your heart. 

“Yeah, right,” you say quietly, “tell that to me when you get married to Hyun-ae and I still don’t get a boyfriend,” you smile despite your words, wanting to relive these moments when you grew older. 

Time just passed so quickly. You never noticed when you became a teen, and then an adult, and now you’re supposed to get married soon — well, not really. You’re just faking it. But still, the actual day isn’t that far either. You’ll find someone soon enough. Or so you hoped. 

“Anyway… I better get my beauty sleep now,” you hear him laugh into the phone. “What’s so funny with that?” you frown. “It’s nothing. I’ll see you tomorrow then. Good night.” You smile. 

“Okay… Goodnight.“ 

“Yeah, goodnight.“ 

“Mhm, goodnight.“ 

“Goodnight.“ 

"God, just hang up already!” you exclaim, making him shout even louder. “You hang up!” that one hurt your ears badly. You groan. “Fine!” giving up, you end the call. Jungkook was the most annoying human being you had come across, but that didn’t mean you didn’t care for your friendship. 

He was just a tease and a knuckle-head sometimes. Though you appreciated him for exactly that — being stupid. After getting ready for bed, you try to calm down your nerves and prepare yourself mentally for pretending to be Jungkook’s girlfriend. The words tasted bitter on your tongue. 

It didn’t feel right to pretend like this, but you couldn’t do much than just following Jungkook and praying that everything will go well to a God you didn’t believe in. 

Closing your eyes, you began wishing for a better tomorrow.

———

You didn’t even notice how you got into the car next day to drive away to Jungkook’s, but you simply guessed you did, and the next thing you knew was that you were approaching the borders of the ruled land. It was beautiful, just as thriving and prosperous as the last time you had seen it. 

From the window of the limousine, you could see the merchants and traders, the millions of shops that lined the roads. Even the townspeople were friendly, you had known since they were always very sincere and understanding of Jungkook’s mistakes. 

The residential area was your favourite. You loved seeing their green gardens even though they were very small in comparison to the one you knew. The colourful roofs of the houses always brought a smile on your face. The rule was well-established under Jungkook’s parents, and you just hoped he could continue it. You had high hopes for him. 

The car steadily made its way to the castle, prior to stopping a little way before it. You got out of the car alongside your mother, slightly nervous. You had almost forgotten what you were here for. Some guards made sure of your identities before they escorted you to the door and took your luggage inside, while Jungkook, his younger brother, Junghyun and his parents were standing in the foyer. 

Your father hadn’t come, for he had some important businesses to take care of. You didn’t think ruling was easy, so he was justified. Jin stayed behind too, accompanying your father like the crown prince he is and learning the art of kingship. 

Meanwhile, you were agreeing to be fake-married to your childhood friend. You sigh, then help yourself to a plastered smile as you approach the family. You and your mother curtsy and you let your mother do the talking. You weren’t here to embarrass yourself, that’s for sure. You look towards Junghyun and Jungkook, who are both looking towards you. You give them a light smile, but your eyes just seem to be moving back to Jungkook. You do hope what you’re doing is right. 

“Ah, Y/N, why don’t you and the boys talk for a bit while we do too?” Jungkook’s mother addresses, making you nod furiously. You are guided inside by the two brothers while your mother and their parents walk towards the living room. It dawns over you that you’re supposed to act like a couple since Junghyun is here and even he doesn’t know of the truth, so your hand just finds Jungkook’s. 

Holding your hand, Jungkook leads you towards his bedroom gently. Junghyun follows alongside you, apparently just as fooled as his parents, talking of all the memories you three had made. He wasn’t wrong; certainly, you had spent your childhood with Jungkook and Junghyun. Junghyun wasn’t much younger than Jungkook, but a difference of some years still remained, though most went unnoticed, seeing as Jungkook was just so unexplainably youthful. 

“Or that one time when Jungkook stole your chocolate and you started crying?” Junghyun chuckles, but you need not be reminded of the moments you had cried. All for some chocolate and all because of a bratty Jeon Jungkook. You roll your eyes. 

“Please~! I don’t want to remember that. I cried for this jerk—” you catch yourself just in time before you say something else. Junghyun looks at you, a bit startled. But before you say something to justify yourself, he simply laughs again. 

“It’s good to see that you haven’t lost your fun relationship with him. You’ve just made it stronger.” You nod wearily at his words, smiling while your heart wrenches at seeing the world be fooled. “Tell me, how did you fall in love with my dimwit of a brother? He really is lucky to have you—" 

"That’s enough, isn’t it, Junghyun?” for the first time in a while, Jungkook spoke up in the conversation. “But I do want to know!” Junghyun frowns. 

You laugh at his adorable expression. When you were near a cute Junghyun, you doubted anyone could ever reject his request. You begin to speak, even though you held no particular feelings towards Jungkook himself in that way. “I’ll tell you,” you smile, “your brother,” you hold onto his hand a little tighter while you think. 

“Your brother is a softie. Even though he looks like the type of person to fight you if you wake him up when he doesn’t want to be.” Junghyun chuckles lightly at your words. “Is he? He’s never that way towards me,” you felt how Jungkook’s fingers intertwined with yours. Was it a signal to stop, or maybe keep going? Or did you really say something true? You didn’t pick up on that one. 

“He is,” you reply with a quick smile, before Jungkook stops in his tracks, making you stop too. “We’re here,” the male speaks and then turns around to Junghyun. “Your job is done. Thank you for accompanying Y/N. I’ll be taking her now,” the grin on Jungkook’s face did tug at your heart, you weren’t going to lie. Junghyun did protest like a little child, but he left soon enough. 

 By that time, you were sitting on Jungkook’s bed, waiting for Jungkook to close the door so you could talk to him about the whole situation. 

“You okay?” he asks, coming to sit down next to you after closing the door. “I’m fine. Just…” maybe it was for the fact that you were pretending to be Jungkook’s girlfriend. Maybe that’s why you flinched whenever he came close to you, maybe that’s why you felt so different being in his room, despite being here countless times before. 

“I’m just tired. There’s no good ending to this, Jungkook… I’m tired,” you look towards him, suddenly tears flood your eyes. You don’t know why you are suddenly on the verge of crying. Maybe it’s because you were pretending? 

“I see those happy expressions on my parents’ faces… they don’t fake it, Jungkook,” his expression softens at your words. A little part of you knew that your tears were Jungkook’s weakness. Whenever you didn’t feel good, he’d get incredibly worried. You didn’t cry as much in front of him anymore, but you hoped that he didn’t change. That he still cared for you, even if a little bit. That’s what you hated about growing up, you would have other people in your heart, and Jungkook would have others. You wouldn’t care as much for each other anymore. And that fact scared you. 

Seeing you act so small, Jungkook couldn’t believe his eyes. He puts your head against his chest, hugging you side-ways. He didn’t know you were so pressured by his request. It wasn’t something small and he wouldn’t trust anyone but you with it. He did care a lot for you. And he wanted you to know that, even if he acted like an imprudent, idiotic friend sometimes. He had asked a little too much of you and he was coming to understand that. But the damage had been done. 

How could he reverse the action? There was no way. You were stuck with him till he revealed the truth, and the mere thought of you crying hurt him. It was painful to see you cry, even for an over-confident, cold person like Jungkook. He had made you cry, just because he was too scared to tell his family the truth, and he was scared he might not be accepted for dating someone that wasn’t of a noble or royal family. 

 He would try to tell the truth very soon, he promised to you mentally. He would do anything, to tell the truth when the right time comes. He just hoped you were willing to wait for that long. 

“Shh,” he hushes, running his hand through your hair in gentle strokes. You smiled a little. At least you had someone. It was better than being alone. “I know that. I know and I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry for asking you something like this. Hyun-ae and I just weren’t ready. And what I did makes me look like a complete idiot, so I’m very sorry for being so inconsiderate towards you. I really… appreciate that you’re going this far for me." 

Your efforts, at least, were recognised. That is what made it all the better. The door was being knocked on. 

While you made sure your make-up was intact, Jungkook opens the door. It’s Junghyun’s voice from what you can hear. "Fine,” Jungkook says, closing the door and turning to you. You raise a brow, wondering what’s the problem now. “Mother wants us to talk to the media and announce our marriage. They agree with it." 

The way he spoke the words made your cheeks taint with pink. You weren’t expecting it to be so soon, but your families knew each other very well, so it was no surprise. You were really going to fool the world now. It was happening, and the nerves instantly came back from last night. 

Taking a deep breath as you fixed the last of your make-up and took a final look in the mirror after your breakdown, you turn towards Jungkook. 

"Okay. Let’s go.” 

By the time you were standing in front of the crowd of reporters and paparazzi, your nerves had taken complete control of you. 

Jungkook’s and your mother explained the situation to the media while you stood a little to the side, your hand in Jungkook’s. He said it would emphasise the relationship, but you weren’t very sure of that. You just wished he knew the risks. 

“When are you planning to hold the wedding?” one reporter asks, his voice ringed out the loudest. Sometimes, when they thought you weren’t looking, the paparazzi would take a picture of your intertwined hand with Jungkook. Everyone’s eyes turn expectantly at his mother at the question. 

“I’m scared,” you whisper to Jungkook, hoping he hears.

It wasn’t like voicing out your emotions rid you of the situation, but it did make you feel better when Jungkook squeezed your hand. “It’s okay… calm down.” Jungkook’s mother thought quietly for a moment. 

“The wedding date hasn’t been decided as of yet, but it will take place as soon as possible — it depends on the preparations. But I’d say very soon.” You didn’t know what very soon meant, but you doubt it was good for the plan. 

“Could we have a picture of the couple?”

Your cheeks turn pink at the word, flustering you. Maybe you’d never get used to this till it ends. 

You did find the idea of having a partner nice, but Jungkook as that partner? You had never thought about him that way. But then again, you guess it wasn’t that impossible to think of your relationship accelerating. The way he genuinely laughs, the smile on his dimpled face, the fact that he does care for you — it all ignited this small fire inside you. Maybe being his partner wasn’t that far off. 

Jungkook’s mother nodded to the question, and all the cameras had turned towards you and Jungkook before you knew it. “Are we going to pose or—?” you ask hastily, making him look to you with a light smile. For the first time, you hope that the smile meant something more than just a mask. 

Putting his arm around your waist, his lips catch yours unexpectedly. For the sake of the plan, you close your eyes and try not to act surprised, but you didn’t deny the fact that your heart was racing. His soft lips, and the way he smiles ever so sweetly while kissing you, it all starts to become so precious to you. You were wrong when you thought about who’d want to be his girlfriend — who wouldn’t want to be his girlfriend? 

The kiss, gentle and at the same time, passionate, lasted longer than you had expected it to. Probably because there were a lot of cameras and he wanted to make sure they all got a picture. You didn’t mind it at all though. Dare you say it, you loved it. It was like a little taste of something you had never tasted before. It left you wanting more, even if it was only a little bit you’d receive. But you were going to hold a grudge against him and yourself for this one. He had a girlfriend, already, for God’s sake. 

“Do tell us what it is you love about princess Y/N?" 

The question must have caught both of you out of the blue, because you turn to each other at the same time. Everyone turns to you two, and in the heat of the moment, Jungkook decides to speak up. "I love Y/N. We’ve had so many memories together. Spent our whole lives next to each other, basically,” you had been freaking out on the inside till he had started speaking. Thankfully, no one seemed to get that from the plastered smile on your face. 

“I love us. I love how she is so caring and helpful. She might be a bit annoying at times,” you elbow him, “but I love that side of her too. She’s the most precious to me.” You couldn’t help but take the words to heart. Now you desperately wanted to hear “I love Y/N” from his lips over and over again — but that would never happen. You were just getting your hopes up, and Jungkook was practically begging you to do that. 

“What do you think about the crown prince?" 

You start to fluster, trying to think of words. Why did they have to know all of this? You were going to make sure that on your real wedding announcement, these questions would be banned — why did it hurt when you labelled this relationship as fake? You were only taking this logically. The heart was naive. 

 "I think that Jungkook is great.” You try to come up with more, turning quiet. Jungkook’s hand finds yours again, intertwining once more. But why did it matter so much now? “He’s funny and energetic. He helps me loosen up. I…” you bite your lower lip, not able to say what you thought of. If you said “I love him,” would it stand out to him like it stood out to you? 

“He’s the… most amazing person and I couldn’t ask for anyone better." 

———

You slump down on the bed on your stomach as you reach Jungkook’s room after the horrible announcement, him following behind you. "You’re that tired, pillow princess?” you hear him say, and even if you can’t look at his face, you’re so sure he has that grin on his face like always. 

You groan, turning to lay on your back. “I’m not tired. Do you know how horrible it went?" 

"It went perfectly. Everyone thinks we’re dating. Now what you need to do,” he says as he leans down on the bed alongside you, “is to keep it going. Mother is really keen on having me take over the throne this year. Which, I suppose you know the rules, but you have to have a queen for that. Hence the rushed wedding. She says the engagement isn’t very important." 

"But it is—” you cut in, though Jungkook doesn’t acknowledge the sudden interruption. “I agree with her. Do you want us to be legally bound before the wedding? Did you forget the actual plan?” you sigh. He was right. In the end, it wasn’t you who was going to get married to him. It was Hyun-ae. 

“Right. You’re right. Why did you need this time anyway?” you ask, turning to Jungkook. You had totally forgotten about the kiss, but now remembering it, you couldn’t just pretend that it didn’t happen. 

You were going to ask him about that too. “Hyun-ae needs to talk with her family about everything. I have to, too. I don’t know how to approach them right now… you know?” he answers calmly. “I almost feel like I’m being used." 

Jungkook looks at you, then sighs. He pulls himself up to look over you. You feel a little exposed, but if this plan were to go smoothly, you had to be a good sport about it and help Jungkook. Even though he didn’t do anything back for you. If not for Jungkook himself, then for the bond you shared. It had to go this way. 

"I’m sorry again.” The simple apology made you feel a little sad. “Not that I mind being used,” you laugh, sitting up. You realise how weird it sounds and shrug a little. “I mean… it’s good to be of use, right…? Help your friends?” you smile lightly at him, making him shake his head. “You’re too nice for your own good,” he says quietly, making you giggle. “That’s the first time I’ve heard it from you. Glad to know my efforts actually matter!" 

"Your efforts do matter. Yes, maybe sometimes, I’m ignorant of the fact that you’ve saved my ass countless times, but I appreciate you. Please know that,” he smiles a little your way, making you smile back. Your thoughts wander back to the kiss, which still makes your heart race. Maybe it’s because you have never kissed Jungkook. Whatever the reason, your mind couldn’t wrap itself around the way his lips felt on yours.

A little part of you wanted to experience that feeling again, but that was wrong and you weren’t asking a taken man to kiss you. That was stupid, not to mention, awkward. 

“So the kiss… Jungkook,” you can see how he tenses up at you bringing up the topic. It worries you. “You have a girlfriend." 

"I know.” 

“But you still kissed me." 

"I know.” 

“Why?” you ask bleakly, looking at him and hoping to receive the same back, but he doesn’t turn towards you. The air just gets a little chilly. It makes you nervous. “I had to make them believe us. Hyun-ae will understand. I know you hated it. I’m very sorry for that too,” you shake your head at his words. Choosing to ignore that he said you hated the kiss, you sigh. 

“It’s fine. But you should check up with Hyun-ae. She’d feel very bad if you didn’t approach her about this." 

You’d feel bad if you saw in the news that your boyfriend had kissed someone else and they were going to get married soon — even though it was fake and you knew. You’d still want your boyfriend to tell you about it, reassure the fact he still loved you. Hyun-ae was the victim in this situation, not you — having seen her boyfriend kissing someone she didn’t know all over the place, hearing it from everyone in town, yet still being able to do nothing about it, because she was not in the position to. You felt bad for her. 

"You’re right… I’ll call her,” Jungkook gets up, taking his phone and leaving the room. 

It felt a little empty without him, especially as it was his room. You had been here multiple times, but maybe it was his presence you wanted most. You shake your head. If you pretend to fall for Jungkook, maybe it will happen. And you didn’t want to fall for someone you couldn’t have. 

Someone, who is so dear to you. It would just put both of you in trouble. And you wanted him to be married to someone he loved — that someone wasn’t you and you had to accept it. 

——— 

Before you knew it, it was dinner time. 

Jungkook had talked with Hyun-ae, and initially, she had been a little angry, but thankful that Jungkook had talked it out with her, so things were settled soon enough. Or that’s what you were told, anyway. 

 You sat down at the royal table to eat. It was a little larger than yours back at home, but nonetheless, the food looked delicious and you couldn’t wait to dig in. Midway through the dinner, Jungkook’s father spoke up. 

“I believe that it would be good if you two spent more time looking around the kingdom together. Jungkook could show you the famous sites,” his father turns to you, and you give him a slight nod with a smile. Wonderful — more time to spend with the annoying Jeon Jungkook. You turn towards the said boy, who seems to be eating his dinner quietly. Very unlike himself. 

“That works… and about the rooms,” you say, starting to play with your food out of nervousness. “Where will I sleep?” you ask quietly, though everyone seems to hear it loud and clear. Jungkook turns to you instantly, and you could see the worry in his eyes. Worry for what, you did not know. “Room? Won’t you sleep in Jungkook’s room?” his mother speaks, making you bite your tongue. You shouldn’t have said that. But you didn’t want to share the room with Jungkook. That would be awkward. 

“I was thinking of that, I just—” you bite your bottom lip, then shake your head. There was no explaining it. If you didn’t shut up now then everyone would catch on. “It’s fine, I’ll share the room with Jungkook,” and you supposed the bed, but you hoped it wouldn’t be the case. “Anywho, when are we going to visit the sites?” you change the topic abruptly, mustering a smile. 

You did not dare to look at Jungkook. 

After dinner, you opted to spend time in Jungkook’s room. Clearing your head, you stood at the balcony near the railing. Jungkook’s father had decided that you’d be going to visit the famous sites tomorrow. It was certainly going to be interesting, seeing as Jungkook showed no liking to things like that. He’d probably take you to a fun ride instead. Or so you hoped, because you had no interest in seeing famous sites and learning their names either. 

 Sometimes you and Jungkook were two peas in a pod, and sometimes he felt like your polar opposite. 

Everything was so hard to digest. Why were you agreeing to his plans, you didn’t even know the full tale. In the end, you knew it would give nothing but pain. So why did you agree? 

You thought it was because you were trying to be a good friend. You had known Jungkook for so long. You appreciated whatever you had with him, and you supposed that was why. You wanted him to marry his love. And at the same time, losing him to Hyun-ae felt like hell. 

Ultimately, that was his happiness. So you wanted him to marry the love of his life. The thought brought a smile to your face. But still, your heart wrenched. It was melancholic — you loved the thought of it, but you couldn’t see him getting married. Because that meant you were growing up. You wouldn’t be around each other anymore. Responsibilities would be burdening you. And in the end, the ties would be cut. 

Well, not cut. They’d fade away. Time took everything from you. From everyone. But especially from you. You didn’t want to lose your friend to something as idiotic as marriage. You were surprised initially that he was even settling down — Jeon Jungkook was settling down for someone. Out of all the things you expected, that wasn’t one of them. He must really love her. 

You wished you could experience that kind of feeling. Unconditional, pure love for someone. Wanting to be with them so bad. But whenever you thought about that, you’d just feel lost. There was no one you felt something like that for. 

 "What are you thinking of?“ Jungkook’s voice rings in your ear, making your thoughts disappear. "Just the… whole thing. About you marrying Hyun-ae,” you wonder if it came out wrong. If Jungkook would be mad at you for putting it that way. If he was offended. But he wasn’t. Instead, he approached you quietly, now standing alongside you. 

“What do you mean?” you sigh at his question. “I meant… This is stupid,” you groan, unable to put your thoughts into words. “What I mean is… I don’t want to lose my friend. I am scared that… when you’ll get married… you’ll leave me. And seeing how things are going, I don’t think our kingdoms will be friends for much longer. We’re fooling everyone, Jungkook. They believe our lies,” you turn to him. It wasn’t a frown that you had on your face, it was fear for the future. 

It was like a river was rushing through your head and heart. A bunch of emotions colliding with each other, washing away your comfort and peace. You were beyond scared. You had always imagined spending the rest of your life with Jungkook — but that was always as friends. Now, you weren’t sure what you were anymore. 

“Imagine the chaos and betrayal. Everyone will lose their trust in us. They will make fun of you. Fun of me. Fun of our families. And you’re doing this just because… what? You want a common girl?” the sentence came out harsher than you wanted it to be. Jungkook turns his head to you. You could feel poison seeping out of his eyes for a moment. It hurt you more than it should’ve. 

“Don’t speak of Hyun-ae like that.” You sigh, nodding sarcastically. “Right. And you tell me who should I speak of like that? You or Hyun-ae? You’re both behind this! You’re ruining everything. You’re ruining your life, you’re ruining your future rule, and you’re ruining my life too!” you exclaim. “Keep it down or they’ll hear us,” Jungkook mutters. 

“I’m a victim in this situation!” you speak even louder. “I’m scared for my life! I deserve to speak as much as I want. However loud I want. Do you know what you’ve put me through?! What I have to do?! All this pretending, these lies,” you stop to catch your breath, hands trembling. “It’s not going to end good, Jungkook. It’s not going to end well. Your plans are bound to fail, like always.” You were initially surprised that you spoke this far without getting interrupted. Jungkook didn’t speak up. 

“You’ve ruined me. For once, at least once… be my saviour like I’ve been yours.” 

You didn’t speak to each other that night after that. 

He was your ride or die. He had never put anyone above you. But now it was clear. It was clear that he didn’t care for your life anymore — he had Hyun-ae now. He had her love and he didn’t mind whatever happened to your friendship. With those thoughts, you cried yourself to sleep that night on the bed. 

———

It was day one of sight-seeing. Or more like, site-seeing. Jungkook had made himself comfortable on the floor last night. You woke up to find him laying on the ground, sound asleep. At first, you were shocked, but remembering the events of last night, the sorrow and tension just returned to you. 

You shook him awake, and he retorted at first like he always did, but in the end, he did get up. 

He was now going through his closet, trying to pick an outfit. It reminded you of how you still hadn’t unpacked. Your luggage had been put in Jungkook’s room and looking over your shoulder, you could see the two bags you had packed. They were small and cute, pink in colour. They stood out in the room, which was mostly of golden and brown hues. 

The truth was that you were afraid of talking to Jungkook. Seeing as he didn’t care enough to initiate the conversation, it made you nervous. Had he really taken all of those things to heart? More importantly, you were asking yourself if you really did mean everything you had said. 

Were you mad at him or was it the frustration of pretending to be something, someone you’re not? 

Mentally telling yourself ‘screw it,’ you turn to Jungkook and clear your throat to gain his attention. He doesn’t stop looking for clothes through his wardrobe, but you saw him flinch ever so slightly when you did make a sound. You were going to say sorry. But was it really your fault? 

You wondered why you were even saying sorry when it wasn’t even your fault. If anything, it was Jungkook’s. And Hyun-ae’s, someone that you hadn’t even met yet, but still she was ruining your life. You dismissed yourself again. You had to be a good friend. 

“…I’m sorry about last night…” you begin speaking, making him stop in his actions. His face was hidden behind his arm, so you couldn’t see his expression. You were feeling really sick now. “I’m sorry about whatever I said,” even though it was all correct, “it was very inconsiderate of me,” it was very inconsiderate of him to ask you to do all this, “and I’m really at fault. I mean it.” You didn’t mean it. 

He turns to you with a sigh, then sits down next to you on the bed. “It's… it’s fine. I know you wouldn’t mean those types of things, I just…” he bites his lower lip, clearly confused about his own emotions. “You just got defensive?” you ask bitterly, making him frantically shake his head. He stayed quiet for a moment. “Maybe you’re right — yeah — I guess…” he gives in, nodding lightly. 

You click your tongue, “you know fights aren’t worth it. Let’s just… forget it, ‘kay? That never happened, okay?” you smile at him, he looks at you with uncertainty before he gives you a bright smile back. Bright just like himself. That’s one thing you loved about your friendship: you made up quickly. You loved that smile. You loved his laugh, the genuine one. 

He was sarcastic and stupid, he did things that were, otherwise, outright reckless, but you loved that too. It was what made him… well, him. 

That day was spent around the popular sites of the kingdom — he showed you a clocktower that was made by his great-grandfather. It reminded you of Big Ben, which was in England. 

Next, you were shown the royal museum that held the edicts and some artefacts, which were used by the royal family. Some were swords used in ancient wars, some were cups of gold used by the previous kings, and the proclamations of some rulers were inscribed on scrolls.

You were shown around a lot of historical monuments too. It was quite boring, to be honest, and Jungkook’s father had one of the noblemen show you and tell you everything, so you couldn’t even do something fun. At least Jungkook’s snarky comments saved the day. 

——— 

Day two had been switched up by Jungkook. He had told his father that ‘enough was enough’ and he ‘wanted to do something more fun’. So you guessed that’s how you got to the amusement park you were at now. 

It was the largest one in his kingdom, no doubt quite expensive, with the rides you had seen. It was nicely decorated, with banners and streamers. Almost like a birthday party. But maybe the sight would’ve been more colourful if the paparazzi hadn’t swarmed you, shoving the cameras in your faces. 

You held Jungkook’s hand tightly as you ventured through the crowd. You never knew Jungkook was good at archery. But apparently, he was. It was a little minigame and if you could hit all the points on the several boards, you could choose what prize you wanted — they were all plushies. 

When he did hit all the points, he offered you to choose the prize for yourself. You knew exactly what you wanted. The cute pink bunny, which in the end, was named Cooky by Jungkook. Ironic. 

You went on a rollercoaster next. It would be an understatement to say you were screaming all the way. Jungkook was surprised that your voice could even reach that high. “Only if you put me on a rollercoaster or put a cockroach on me,” you had replied, making him laugh as he dragged you to the next ride. 

 But you wished you had known that one ride could make you scream like no other. 

It was a ship. A ship dangling in the air. Now you were told that it would swing forward and backward in the air, but that didn’t explain the horror enough. 

“Jungkook, for the love of God, I swear I’ll give you all the banana milk you want, please don’t let me go, please don’t let me go, I’m gonna die—!” maybe you had forgotten to mention that those kinds of rides made you sick. Any time the ship swung forward was the mania. You felt like it would throw you out of it. You were clinging to Jungkook for your dear life, with him holding Cooky alongside you. 

You felt like you’d die. Any time it swung backwards, you’d get the time to breathe and calm down, then prepare yourself for the next forward swing, but of course, you could never be prepared enough. In the end, you’d always scream your lungs out. Thankfully, Jungkook held onto you securely the whole time. 

 "It’s okay, it’s okay!” you heard his laugh follow. Your arms were around his thin waist, making sure you wouldn’t fall off. You felt like you were flying but it was worse. You were just praying you wouldn’t fall out and die. 

At least Jungkook managed to whisper affirmative words, and you were able to catch a few in the loud wind. “It’ll be fine, I’m with you, it’s okay… I’m with you,” he kept on repeating. You were glad when the ride was over, and you had to be supported by a laughing Jungkook as you were quite dizzy after all that. 

Your brain was buzzing and you couldn’t even see properly. In fact, you were shaking in your boots. That was the worst time of your life. And you never wanted to experience it again. 

 To calm things down a bit, Jungkook decided to go on the Ferris wheel next. Cooky was given to you and you hugged it the whole way to the ride. Getting into your cabin, you were finally able to take a breath of relief and organise your thoughts. Your hair was a bit of a mess, so you fixed that as best as you could. You still hugged Cooky tightly though. You were scared. 

 "The sunset’s pretty,“ you couldn’t believe the day had gone so fast as you spoke. Sunsets were always pretty romantic, so mentioning that just made you nervous. Jungkook smiled softly, nodding to your words. Seeing that smile on his face, it just made you feel all giddy. 

At some point during the ride, the question turned from ‘why could everyone see you as a real couple’ to ‘who wouldn’t call you two a couple?‘ 

 You were falling deeper and deeper into the abyss that was Jungkook. Yes, he was foolish and he made decisions even if he knew that they would result in bad things happening. He wasn’t the smartest, but his smile was adorable. His laugh was adorable. The way he held you was something you had started to like a lot more. You really did love everything he did — so were you in love? 

No, of course not… or you thought. He had a girlfriend and it was stupid to be in love with a taken man. But he did ask you to act like his soon-to-be wife, so you were just going to use that to your advantage. Maybe you couldn’t be with him, but the moments you two had were precious to you. 

And if you could have more of those, then you were satisfied. Love hurt and it didn’t always work out. And that was fine, so you wouldn’t try to make him fall for you. 

You were sure that if he was meant to do that, then it could’ve been done a lot more sooner — before Hyun-ae had come into the picture. 

"I really like it too.” His reply made you lose your train of thought. You smiled at him as he stared in the distance, looking a lot calmer than usual. Maybe the possibility of falling in love with your childhood friend wasn’t that low. 

The kiss came back to you, memories of his soft lips flooding your mind. Heat rose to your cheeks, so you opted to conceal your blushing face by hiding it behind the giant pink bunny that was Cooky. 

Maybe you wouldn’t mind falling for Jeon Jungkook. 

———

Each and every day, you felt like you were falling more and more for his beautiful smile. His oblivious laugh. His sparkling eyes. He may have been intimidating, but he was the softest person you knew. He was caring and gentle.

He was protective of those he cared for. Just like you. Just like Hyun-ae.

At one point, you had told yourself to stop falling for him. Like it was even possible. But still, you distanced yourself from him. Or you had tried to. You had told yourself that he was taken, it was stupid to fall for him, you couldn’t do it. You couldn’t bear being hurt. But the heart never listened to anyone. You just felt yourself wanting more and more from him.

You had always thought that your ‘soulmate’ must be out there somewhere, just waiting for you to come along. But now that you were falling deeper into the spiral, it eventually changed to ‘my soulmate lives in the kingdom next to mine and we’re ‘best friends’.’

But that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. It hurt. It hurt so much. It killed you inside when you realised you couldn’t be with him. It absolutely devastated you. You hated it. But at the same time, you were happy. Wasn’t that love? Being happy because your loved one is. Smiling because he smiled. Laughing because he laughed. Living because he did. That was certainly how you felt.

"Tonight, we’re going out,” Jungkook says one unexpected night. You look at him with furrowed brows, confused. You had been continuing the site-seeing but you hadn’t been out at night. “Why? Where?” you blurt out, caught off-guard by the sudden exclamation.

Jungkook shifts closer to you hastily. “We’re alone, Guk. Seriously. No one is going to overhear you. We’re in your room,” you roll your eyes, but you don’t forget that your heart is racing because of how close he is to you. “We’re going to the club tonight.”

The seductive whisper wasn’t even the thing that sent chills down your spine. It was the fact that you were going to the club. And if you didn’t know better, you would’ve asked which club, but you knew it was the one Hyun-ae worked at. You felt a little unready for the whole occasion, to be honest.

“I— but what about your parents? What will we tell them?” you ask nervously, making Jungkook chuckle. Who were you kidding, he had probably taken care of that. He was just the best when it came to the worst things.

“Junghyun will take care of it. I told him to make up an excuse. He doesn’t know which club we’re going at anyway. Neither does he know about Hyun-ae,” you couldn’t ignore how sweetly he pronounced her name. Like she was something so precious, just an absolute treasure to him. You wished he called you like that.

“Okay.”

So that’s how you got to the club. It was jammed with people. You guessed that common clubs would be even more jammed. You saw people of high status dancing to the beat of the music on the dance floor, some had their lips on others’, some were downing glasses by the second. The overall situation was just sensual.

“This way,” with your hand in Jungkook’s, you were led to the bar where Hyun-ae worked at.

“Jungkook!” she was beautiful. In the dim lighting, you couldn’t see her especially well, but she was drop-dead gorgeous from what you did see. If you weren’t aware of her social status, you may have thought she was a princess working at a bar or something. Her voice was soft but clear, it was like music to your ears.

You were taken to a more secluded corner of the club, where Jungkook’s hand left yours. You felt yourself missing the touch instantly. He stood next to Hyun-ae now. Of course, she was his main priority. You were guessing the night was going to be a long one.

“So you’re Y/N?” you nod to her words, before realising that she probably couldn’t see that well either and decide to speak up. “Yeah,” you say. A little piece of your heart was on fire right now. It was hurting so much. This was the girl he was going to marry. After everything, she was the end goal. You bite your lip in an effort not to break down. You kept telling yourself you were happy for him.

But you weren’t. You were hurt. You wanted him to always be there like he had. You were being selfish and you hoped he’d forgive you for it. “It’s great to meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you from Jungkook,” Hyun-ae giggled afterwards. “Thank you for being a good friend to Jungkook,” you could see her outline move closer to Jungkook’s. She wrapped her arm around Jungkook’s affectionately. You nodded slowly, then sighed.

You wanted to cry. Why did you agree? Jungkook’s adorable laugh as Hyun-ae put her arm around his — it was contagious. That was how you knew it was real. “I-It’s nothing, really. I appreciate Jungkook as a friend too…” you say quietly. Even your words were like a dagger to your heart. Your poor heart suffered too much.

You excused yourself as they started to say their ‘I love you’s. You didn’t want to hear it. You didn’t want to suffer more than you already had. Trying to hold back your tears, you blamed yourself for falling too hard, too deep. Your heart was pounding against your chest. You just wanted to hold him. You just wanted him but even that seemed too much to ask for.

You can barely stand up yourself, so you take support from the counter of the bar. “Some long island iced tea, please,” you mutter to the person at the counter, who prepares you the glass and you gulp it down within a matter of seconds, hoping it would ease the tightness of your chest. You knew you were going to get badly drunk, but it didn’t matter anymore. As long as you didn’t have to be sad today. It certainly did help.

You felt better. The liquor was washing away your sorrows. Your mind felt a little fuzzier. You order one more glass. Just one more couldn’t hurt. You drink that one down too, but this time leisurely, feeling a lot more free and careless.

The surroundings were becoming more blurry by the second. You felt light-weighed. Your tipsy self walked over to the familiar corner of the club, where you saw Jungkook and Hyun-ae on their own. Tugging on your friend’s jacket, you try to balance yourself with his support. “Y/N? Are you already drunk?” he asks, but his voice seems so distant that you just want to be lulled to dreamland at this point.

“No, of course… I'm… not drunk… not… yet?” you say, more as a question than a definite answer. Jungkook sighs. Well, this was bound to happen. He knew you didn’t handle alcohol very well, but how bad exactly, he wasn’t sure.“What did you have? Are you okay? Should I take you home?” you nod slowly to his words, but your brain didn’t register anything. “Two… iced teas… the long island ones…” you take the moment to appreciate the way Jungkook’s hands kept you up. You’d slide down to the ground if it wasn’t for him. 

"Seriously?“ he muttered something to Hyun-ae afterwards, but you didn’t catch it. "Let’s go… and sleep, I’m really tired…” you hadn’t even been there for half an hour. Yet still, you couldn’t keep yourself up anymore. "And let’s sleep on the same bed… okay? Don't… sleep on the floor this time… I’m worried you might catch a cold…” 

“I get it, let’s go,” Jungkook’s frustration was clear. But your drunk self didn’t seem to mind it all. He said some more things to Hyun-ae, whose distorted expression was something between concern and jealousy. Or so you hoped it was jealously, because you hated her. You absolutely loathed her. Everything about her. 

You were finally taken back to the castle unnoticed. 

“Why do we lie, Y/N?” Jungkook asks, you’re almost asleep but his question wakes you up. As he had said, he was going to sleep with you tonight. Every other night, you kept on switching between who’d take the floor and who’d take the bed. He was the one who mostly took the floor, but this night, things were different. 

“I don’t know… why are you asking me… I don’t lie…” you mumble through your sleep, eyes shut gently. “Everyone lies,” hearing Jungkook’s statement, you snicker. “I don’t, suck it up…” you reply. “Right. So you don’t. But why do others lie?” he repeats. 

“Because… hmm… depends…” you shift a little in the warm bed, blanket over your body. Jungkook was sitting on the bed, his back supported by the pillow as he didn’t feel the need to sleep just yet. His phone was in front of him. You wanted him to play you some melodies but that was probably too much. Enough destruction had been done today. 

“Sometimes we lie… because… we want to make others happy…” you pause, drifting more into sleep. “And other times?” Jungkook beckons you to continue. “Well… other times… we lie because… we don’t want to get into… trouble.“ 

"Oh,” Jungkook blurts out, making you reach out absent-mindedly, and punch his arm. Or it felt like his arm anyway. “Like you do. But there’s one other time we lie…” Jungkook’s eyes were on you. You could feel them. “When we… want something from someone else. When we are using them." 

"Now play me some music, please… some soft… sweet music." 

"I’ll sing for you." 

"Yes please…" 

"And you bless me with the best gift, that I’ve ever known, you give me purpose.” 

——— 

Lately, things had been very hard. Jungkook’s mother wasn’t joking when she had said that the wedding would be held as soon as possible. You were hogged with what to wear, make-up, hairstyles, and everything. 

You told her to take it slow as Jungkook had advised you to do, but she was very keen, just like you had thought. Side by side, your mother was in favour of everything too. 

To calm things down a bit, you told your mother and his mother that you and Jungkook would be going sightseeing again. It was the only way you could get out and breathe some fresh air. Most girls would be excited for their wedding day, but you wanted to postpone it as much as possible — well, it wasn’t yours, to begin with. 

The crowd was really bad this time. You were visiting the statue that Jungkook’s grandfather had apparently built. It was a man, young from what you could see, made of some sort of metal, maybe bronze or gold, but you weren’t sure. He held up a sword in the air, which reminded you almost of winning a war and doing your victory pose. Or maybe you had been playing a lot of Overwatch with Jungkook. 

News of your wedding was all around the kingdom now, you guessed it was like that in yours too. 

Jungkook’s hand was holding yours. But perhaps not as strongly. Everyone kept asking questions and screaming names, you may have heard some death threats too. Possibly fangirls of the prince, you guessed. The crowd’s force was so strong, even the few guards you had brought weren’t strong enough to hold them back. Should’ve brought more guards, the same thought recurred. 

Your hand left Jungkook’s in the midst of all the shouts and screams, and pushing and pulling. You were drawn back in the crowd, with no one noticing that you were outside the swarm now. 

Frantically, you ran around the circle of people, trying to get in but everyone was so used to forcing their way through, you couldn’t even get back to your friend. The word tasted bitter on your lips. You sigh, hastily running to another side before your eyes settle at the cafè that’s beside the other shops in the area. 

Hyun-ae. You could recognise her in the bright daylight. She was there with someone. A man, a man whose face was half-covered by the mask that he was wearing over his mouth. One you didn’t know. 

You step closer to the window, where their seats were at. Maybe you could hear them? Who was he? You didn’t want to jump to wrong conclusions, they could be siblings or cousins… or maybe even friends, who knows? But the sick feeling that you get at the pit of your stomach tells you something else entirely. 

Your breath is basically non-existent as you step closer, and the two don’t notice you. You stand next to the glass window, your back supported by the wall. You hope no one is recording you. You hope you don’t turn up in the newspapers, accused of eavesdropping. But you have to do this for yourself. For yourself and Jungkook. Besides, the reporters were a little too biased towards Jungkook and what he did rather than your doings. 

“I asked him for some more time,” her voice was just the same you had remembered it. It was still beautiful, and while you had only met her once, it was short, and days have passed since then, you could still recognise it. The only difference was that now it was infusing with your blood like poison. You hated her voice, her being. 

Your stomach started to churn and do back-flips. Your insides were burning. You felt almost bad for Jungkook. Was she the only one who needed time? Was that why you were dragged into this? 

“I don’t want to marry him. But I need to become queen,” you hear her whine. “Ah, Jagiya~ it’s okay,” the male’s voice was indistinguishable. You didn’t know who he was. “But I want to marry you! But you’re just not… enough. You’re not as rich. You’re not a prince,” she frowned. 

What was more stupid was that she was right near where Jungkook was. Did she expect him to show up and break up with her? How’d she ever become queen then? You wondered what her motive was. 

“Plus, I hate that friend of his. He’s always talking of her and she seems to be the type of person who talks all about him too.” That wasn’t a surprise. While it did make your heart flutter when you heard that he was talking of you to his girlfriend, that wasn’t what mattered right now. What mattered was that Jungkook was dating a cheater and it was stupid of him to waste his energy on someone like her. 

Tired and obviously angry, you give Jungkook a message to meet you at the car. Your anger was beyond measure. Feeling like you heard something you should not have, you didn’t know how to feel. You were scared, most of all. You finally find the car and get inside, tapping your foot with irritation. 

The car door opens and Jungkook sits inside. The driver starts up the car and you’re taken back to the castle. 

“Are you okay?” Jungkook asks you when you get to his room. You avoided all of his questions in the car. You didn’t want to speak of the matter in front of the driver. 

"Hyun-ae is cheating on you,“ you say, and while you aren’t even the one in the relationship, your eyes flood with tears. You’re worried about Jungkook. You love him. You love him and you don’t want him to be heartbroken. 

"What?” he blurts out, turning to you with surprise. You lock your tear-filled eyes with his blank ones. “Hyun-ae is cheating on you. I saw her. I saw her, she was with another man… she’s…” you bite your lip, looking away. You felt pity above all. Pity for Jungkook. 

And here you thought you were the victim. That you were being used. But it was all along Jungkook, controlled like a puppet, the strings in Hyun-ae’s hands. 

“…she's… u-using you.” Jungkook stays still at the words. He didn’t want to speak. His heart fell. “You must have seen someone else,” he replies, plastering a smile. “There’s a lot of people who look like Hyun-ae." 

"But she sounded like her too." 

"She couldn’t be. She loves me,” you walk closer to Jungkook, shaking your head. How badly you wanted to scream that she didn’t love him like he thought. “How do I tell you…? I should’ve recorded it… I should’ve taken pictures… I know… but… I was too shocked… I’m so sorry,” you look deep in his eyes. For once, you don’t see twinkling stars. You see darkness — emptiness — and that spoke a ton about how he felt. 

“T-Tell me you’re lying. Hyun-ae… she couldn’t do that.” You sigh heavily, and it still isn’t enough to let out the frustration you feel. “I’m not lying. She’s cheating on you. I swear I’m not lying,” you say meekly. “I wouldn’t ever lie to you." 

"But you did.” 

You stare at him, eyes wide. “What do you mean?” you ask, brows furrowing.  "You meant everything you said that night. You said it was stupid of me to marry a commoner. I thought you were my friend…?“ your eyes widen more. 

You shake your head in denial, but your voice doesn’t come out. "Friends support friends." 

"I am supporting you! I’ve always supported you. You’re just blind in love,” you bite your lip, afraid you’d start crying. Jungkook turns quiet. “You can believe whatever you want to. Just know that I told you the truth. It’s Hyun-ae who—" 

"Don’t speak in that way about Hyun-ae!” the loud shout shook you. You take a deep, uneven breath, sniffing. “You picked Hyun-ae over me again. Even if I’m not lying,” you wipe the tears in your eyes. “This was what I was afraid of.” Your heart hurt. It hurt like it never had. You felt like your breath was being taken away, like you were suffocating. 

"I don’t want to do this anymore. It’s a lost cause.”

———

It had been days since then. Jungkook and you had separate rooms now. You had requested that of Jungkook’s mother and she agreed. Everyone could sense that something was wrong, because you both kept shut in your individual rooms. Though no one would mention it. There was no sightseeing, no communication between you and Jungkook.

You’d go to give him food but he’d never open the door. In the end, it was left at his doorstep.

"Y/N, darling, we should go shopping for your dress, no? The wedding is real close,” and did you forget to mention that the wedding was coming really fast now? Unlike yourself, Jungkook was in his room all day. He didn’t get out of it for a single moment. You sometimes got up to go out because your mother told you so.

“Sure…” the wedding was supposed to held in a wedding hall, and you had decided upon going for a more western style. A white dress, made to perfectly suit you. It all felt a little useless now. You weren’t even going to be married to Jungkook anymore. There was no point, but the others didn’t know.

Jungkook didn’t know.

As your mother would show you pretty dresses and awe over them as they fit your wedding theme, you’d think of what Jungkook would be doing. Was he crying? Was he sad? Or was he happy? Was he playing Overwatch, or maybe he was talking to Hyun-ae. Maybe that last thought wasn’t as soothing as the rest. At least every time you gave him food, he’d take it inside. Hopefully, he was eating well. He’d never open the door to anyone though, not while they were standing there.

You sigh, pick any dress that comes to mind and show it to your mother. Your mind just kept zooming back to Jungkook. He hadn’t taken his attire yet, had he? A little part of you felt disgusted because while he was heartbroken, or so you thought anyway, you were picking out a dress for the wedding. And while you did love him, you just wished you could fix everything.

Maybe in another universe, in another world, some other time, you could be with him.

Getting back to the castle, you took the food tray you were offered from the kitchen and took it to Jungkook’s room. This was every day’s routine.

You knock on the door, taking a deep breath. You know he won’t open it, but a little part of you still thinks he considers it. He probably hates you though, no matter how much you deny the thought. “Jungkook… I brought food,” you say quietly, hoping he’d be able to hear it from the other side. Your heart was begging to just see his face again. He felt like a distant memory.

“Jungkook,” you knock the door again, but then stop, giving up. Putting down the tray, you hope he’ll take the food you left and leave.

You needed this to stop. You wanted him to hear from you again. You wanted to see his pretty face again. You wanted to hear his sweet voice again. Taking out your phone, you quietly muttered ‘screw it’ and texted Junghyun to tell him to meet up with you. You decided upon going to a cafè — not the same one as Hyun-ae’s, though. Just a random one that Junghyun recommended. You knew it wasn’t the same one as you entered. You didn’t want to confess in the castle. You were afraid someone would overhear. Plus it felt a little too confined. You wanted to get out and try to be a little happy for once. The castle felt like a jail of lies at this point.

“I want to tell you something…” you couldn’t believe you were doing it. “What?” you knew you could trust Junghyun. But to what extent? You were scared he might tell his parents, and then the news would quickly spread, but you had to do it. You knew you didn’t have Jungkook’s permission. But you weren’t going to back down now. For one, you didn’t need his assistance. You knew the truth. And secondly, it was far too late to turn back now.

“Promise me you won’t freak out,” you look at him with furrowed brows, and he nods slowly. “Okay… but… what are you—?”

“Is that princess Y/N?” you freeze. The news reporters. You could hear them approaching you. And for once, you felt frustrated. Why this place, of all of them? You get up, taking Junghyun’s hand, you get out of the cafè, where the swarm of reporters is already gathering. “Why are you holding prince Junghyun’s hand?” one asks. You take a deep breath. “I—”

“Are you cheating> on prince Jungkook?” your eyes flood with tears. You wanted to scream, you wanted to tell them the truth. But you were the antagonist. You always had been. You were set to be the jealous person that fell in love. You were never the princess you truly were in real life. You could never even think of cheating on Jungkook. But with the way you held Junghyun’s hand, it was clear to the crowd.

“Can you explain your relationship with prince Junghyun?” another asks. “Are you cheating on prince Jungkook with prince Junghyun?” one more question came. You were deaf to all of them. You wished you were. You wished you were deaf to the accusations. You bite your lip in an effort to not break down, tearing at the seams. You were tearing at the seams.

Grasping Junghyun’s hand even tighter, you walk away from the crowd, pushing and making your way back to the sanctuary you once had.

———

“They blame me, Jungkook…” your lip was quivering as you spoke to the door. It was late at night. No one was roaming the corridors at this time, and it was dark. But you hoped, you hoped that Jungkook was hearing you. “I never cheated on you… I swear…” you break down. “I wish you could open the door. I hope you can hear me… but I never cheated on you…” you felt like you were going crazy.

You were desperate to shout out the truth. You were done living a lie. Living as a lie. “Please… Jungkook… we were in this together… you told me that I was never alone…” but you were alone. Alone and so much more. The cheating accusations had spread like a wildfire. But you weren’t cheating. You were telling the truth. You were trying to tell Junghyun the truth so he could help you. He was like a younger brother to you.

“Please open the door…” you sniff, breaking down more. Tears wouldn’t stop falling down your cheeks. “Everyone’s really worried for you too… I wish we could escape this. I wish we really could. I hope you’re okay…” you sob. You had a headache from crying. “I really hope you’re okay…” you bite your quivering bottom lip, “I care for you a lot. A lot. I really do.

"I love us too, Jungkook. But you’re making it hard for me to hang on.”

———

The castle was sombre. It had been like this for a while now. The royal families were trying to handle the situation, but the media had everyone fooled. Jungkook still hadn’t come out of his room, he’d never even take the food anymore. Junghyun had taken refuge in his room, he sometimes would come out. But whenever his eyes met yours, you could see the uncertainty they held.

You had given up on trying to tell anyone about the truth. You couldn’t do it without Jungkook. You wanted to die. You weren’t even living anymore. Just hanging between life and death. The food tasted stale because Jungkook wasn’t there. The room looked darker because Jungkook wasn’t there. Your heart always fell when you saw that the food tray hadn’t been taken inside by Jungkook.

His hands had held you. His arms had protected you. His eyes had made you smile. And his smile had made you laugh and feel all giddy. You couldn’t even blame yourself for falling for him — who wouldn’t fall for him? He was perfect, even with his imperfections, he was perfect.

Maybe the problem was Hyun-ae. Maybe it was her selfishness that led you all to this hell-hole. Or maybe it was you, caring a little too much for your own good.

It was the night before the wedding. You stopped in your tracks in front of Jungkook’s room. The door was as closed as it had ever been. The tray wasn’t touched even a little. You put the food aside.

“Jungkook. Tomorrow’s the wedding,” it wasn’t that late. He should’ve been awake. “Our plans have failed. I’m so sorry.” You turn quiet for a second. “I know you really wanted to marry Hyun-ae. You wanted to marry Hyun-ae and you loved her. You still love her,” it hurt to even say that, “but I failed you. I’m so sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry.” Your head perks up. Did you hear his sweet voice? It was him. Meek, but you could still identify it. “Why are you sorry?” you ask, trembling. You just wished he’d open the door and let you see him. It had been weeks. You couldn’t do it anymore. You couldn’t go by without seeing his beautiful face, his shining eyes.

“You were right. Hyun-ae was cheating on me.” You stare expectantly at the door, waiting for it to open but it didn’t. “How did you find out…?” you ask again. At least you were true. “One of the noblemen told me. His name’s Taehyung. We’re quite good friends. I told him to follow her. He saw it with his own eyes,” he answered. While you did feel sad that he didn’t believe you but he did believe Taehyung, you couldn’t blame him. He really did love Hyun-ae.

“What about… the wedding now?” you ask weakly, afraid to approach the topic. “I don’t know anymore. I gave you so much pain. I put you through so much. You agreed. You deserve a much better friend, Y/N,” you shake your head at his words. “You’re my best friend. And…” you bite your lip. Something in you told you that you weren’t as scared to say it now.

“And I love you.” There was silence on both sides. It was understandable. You wished you were less selfish. He was still going through a break-up, you should’ve been nicer and save it for later. But you had come to realise that later wasn’t a thing anymore. Whatever was going to happen, it had to happen now.

“I loved you too.” Your eyes widen. “I did. I thought you saw me just like a brother… so… I… I went to the bar. I saw Hyun-ae. She helped… she was like a rebound. I hate to put it that way, because I did like her too… but I don’t even deserve you after what I did. I realise now that I’m selfish. I’m self-obsessed. I shouldn’t have asked you such a big favour. I mean… I loved you. You don’t do that to the people you love.

"When I spent time with you, I felt like I was with my soulmate.” You didn’t speak. You were too scared to. “I felt like I was on cloud nine. You made me so happy, Y/N. I laughed the hardest when you were around. You always seemed to put a smile on my face. You really did. I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve you.”

———

The wedding day, you sigh. “Where is Jungkook?!” the queen exclaims, furious. Since he had locked himself in his room, she had bought his attire for him. But he was nowhere to be seen.

You had talked to him last night, but after he confessed, he had turned quiet and eventually you were just talking to yourself.

Your mind did not focus on her though. It was somewhere else. “Love like the one between you and Jungkook can’t be faked, dear. You’ll be very happy with him,” your mother had said as you were being ready for the big day. You couldn’t explain the heartburn you felt when you heard her words.

Now everything was in chaos. No one knew where Jungkook was. You suggested checking his room, but it was locked. A locksmith was called immediately and after he had worked his magic, the door opened.

You were scared. But even more so, worried. Jungkook wasn’t in his room. Opening the bathroom door, Jungkook’s motionless body was found to be in the bathtub.

The rest was a blur. You vaguely remember freaking out, Jungkook’s mother’s screams, and the people who came to pick up the body. You couldn’t stop crying as you reached the hospital and Jungkook was taken straight to the ICU.

Your mother came to sit down beside you. “I’m so sorry, Y/N,” she hugs you, while you sob into her shoulder. You were still in your wedding clothes. “He wasn’t even supposed to be my husband, mother.”

“What?”

“It was a lie…” you admit. “He wanted to marry a commoner. She asked him for time, so he asked me to play along so he could get some more time for his real soon-to-be wife. But she cheated on him. Only wanted the money and status. I wasn’t his wife, mother.” You look at her, her unwavering eyes making you break down even more. “I wasn’t dating Jungkook, mother.”

———

Since then, you’d visit Jungkook every day. He was diagnosed to be in a coma because of the lack of oxygen his brain had received after he tried to suicide by drowning himself.

Your mother had told his parents the truth, and thankfully, even if they were angry for some time, they let you see him again. You’d always bring Cooky with you. It was the one thing he had left you — along with countless beautiful memories.

The first year was heartbreaking. You’d come to visit him and cry every time. You’d tell him how much you love him and that you miss him and his jokes. That everyone misses him. Hyun-ae had come to visit too, and the visit had been short and silent. She told you that she was deeply sorry for what she had done. You fucking hoped she did.

The second year was when most people had forgotten he even existed. The hype had died down, but you still visited him. You told him about how you had spent your day, and that you had met someone promising. You always made sure to kiss him goodbye. You didn’t cry as much now. Sometimes you did, but most of the time, you made jokes. You told him about how people were making fun of you for fake-dating someone as amazing as Jungkook. It hurt, but you felt like Jungkook’s mere presence was enough to make you feel calm.

The third year came and went just as quickly. You told Jungkook about how you had started dating someone for real now. The promising person was by the name of Namjoon. He was another prince you had come across, from a nearby kingdom. Smart, humble, and sweet too. You told Jungkook of your adventures with Namjoon.

The first year that you didn’t have even one day to spare was the fifth one. You and Namjoon had decided to get married. And the preparations had you very busy. You felt bad for that, but you had no other choice.

———

Six years had passed. Going down the aisle, being wed to Namjoon reminded you of your precious friend. He was still in deep sleep, unaware that his loved one was going to get married. Even if he didn’t know Namjoon, he would’ve been the best man at the wedding.

Or wouldn’t it be better if he was the groom himself? You were not going to make the mistake of treating Namjoon as a rebound. It was wrong and he deserved more than that. You had seen how wrong that could go. But there was just something Jungkook had always made you feel that Namjoon just… couldn’t.

He was intelligent, his dimpled smile was adorable. But Jungkook made you feel elevated. He made you feel so incredibly special. And you knew fully well that you couldn’t ever really move on.

You knew that there may have been someone like him out there, but no one was Jungkook. Namjoon was everything Jungkook lacked — he was a planner, he cared for the consequences, and he didn’t take risks. But you just did not feel the way you felt with Jungkook. You wished you could’ve walked down the aisle to Jungkook, but that was wrong to think. So you shook your head and smiled even if your heart was unwilling.

There was no one like Jungkook. He was one of a kind and no one could compete with him. That was a simple truth. You just hoped your dear friend would wake up. There was so much to catch up on. There were so many things you wanted to say to him.

In the place that he would’ve sat today, sat another faithful, dear friend of yours — Cooky. A symbol of your lost love.

#bangtanhq #jungkook #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #fic:sly #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #bts x reader #jimin #taehyung #yoongi #hoseok #jin #namjoon #jungkook scenario #jeon jungkook #fake dating au

[maddiesflame]

the elements series headers

like/reblog if saved © maddiesflame

#the air he breathes #the fire between high & lo #the silent waters #the gravity of us #brittainy c. cherry #headers #tristan cole #maggie may #lucille palmer #graham russell #brooks griffin #elizabeth cole #logan silverstone #alyssa walters #the elements series #the air he breathes headers #the fire between high & lo headers #the gravity of us headers #the silent waters headers #brittainy c. cherry headers #brittainy c cherry #brittainyccherry #book headers #book header #header #header book #books headers #headers books #header books #books header

[butheknewellenough]

tumblr is just a silly, stupid place, it’s literally not real. HOWEVER!!! i have also met a lot of really cool people through this website that have really helped and supported me this year. starting college was pretty hard, but you guys helped me feel less lonely, and i’m really grateful for that. happy new year and new decade. i hope it brings peace, happiness, and prosperity to every single one of you.

i am extremely terrified to forget anyone as i make this post. if i forgot you, know that i will be ashamed of myself for the rest of time.

the lovey gc (@lovedpants, @girlalmightys, @wallsalbum, @sapphicau, @sweaterpawslou, @rendezlou, @missyoulive, @parislarry, @l0veontour, @baby-blue-28, @donckasters, @rosepetallarrie, @lightsuplarry, @sunlightbi, @louisharry, @snflwrgirly, @thesparklemoji, @wtrmlnsugr, @adoreyousummerskies, @snowyswift): i talk to you guys all the time and i really do feel like i can say anything without being judged. i am so appreciative of how supportive and open and LOVING everyone is!! i truly love and appreciate every single one of you and can’t wait to continue getting to know you guys. (special shoutout to leah for my url and maggie for being my secret santa and liz for teaching my sibling how to make a carrd and lauren for making the header for this) <3

atl louies (@peacheslou, @was2011louisevenreal, @styleandsin, @hrrystylesbian, @peculiarsunflower, @wtrmlnsugr, @louis-tomlinson-af, @onehome, @summerstars28, @sships, @lovetourhl, @dnpdab): baby’s first gc (and by this i mean first one that i made)!! i got so lucky with you all because you’re all so amazing and kind and lovely!!! i know i’m not always super talkative in there, but like you guys always make me laugh. i love how we can roast each other, and also how everyone is engaged to each other. a gc of love and laughs!! i sound so cheesy lmao, but i just don’t care. can’t wait to hang out with y’all when we see LOUIS this summer!!

em (@was2011louisevenreal) you get your own section for driving me to fucking nashville. we’ve also known each other for a long ass time, even if we didn’t start talking until recently. you are so selfless and kind and i am blessed to have you in my life!! you are also so funny and i just love spending time with you, whether it be eating mexican food or shopping at walmart on black friday (on accident). love you!!

madie (@peacheslou) you get your own section because of the jristmas memories. my fellow mika lover, my fellow Baby. you are gorgeous inside and out. you are hilarious and talented and smart. i’m lucky to be your friend!! i love you!!

nashville larries: i hope i don't lose anyone, but there were like. a lot of us so! @rbbsbb, @thepeacering, @theparisinterview, @darlingprincesspark thank you for letting me stay up late talking to you guys in your room. thank you for letting me squeeze into your table at the pizza place (even if it put us in the danger zone when that girl vomited...). i loved talking to and getting to know you guys!! and thank you to everyone else who made squeezing into an airbnb like sardines and waiting on the rainy street for hours fun! worth it to see louis and give him the rainbow barri-gayde he deserves! (and special shoutout to gina for giving so many people louis tats on the way there. you are such a badass and also one of the nicest people i’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting) (@hogwartzlou, @velvetsau, @queenbeeharry, @subversivelwt, @cheerleaderharry, @tomlinshires, @alwayseroda, @styleandsin, @pterodicktyl, @definegirlfriends) 

the goldfinch gc (@sweaterxo, @charioteer, @weltonreject, @tragedygirls, @sloppy-bitch-richie, @thenewgothicromance): we are small but mighty. i look forward to future discussions about songs that apply to boreo (and will make me cry) and boris’ slutty, slutty boots. (popchyk forever) <3

skam larries, summer wlw, girls be sexy sometimes, larrie reading club, and bby larries: these gcs may not be as active anymore (or i am not as active in them), but i still appreciate every one of you that i’ve ever talked to you! you are all so lovely and have all made an impact on me!! thank you for that. you are all still very near and dear to my heart!! (@wallsau, @tothe-rain, @atonedirection, @rockingshowlarry, @angelharry, @leedsau, @ot5era, @coalarry, @fondnosescrunch, @heartoutlouis, @goldenkissy, @oioilarrie, @gr8-pot8, @adoreyouhalsey, @holizays, @goldensunflowerera, @harryspdf, @earthyemo, @defencelesslouie, @stormtrooperharry, @shrutishalo, @thehltour, @loudalbum, @alwaysyoump3, @perfectdahling, @embracinglarry)

the burn tables/the lovers club (@softer-boi, @pattyuris, @teasingtozier, @ladybirds2017, @kuninkaanmies, @reddieways, @richiesmp3, @marsisaplanetyall, @jortsbian, @appojoos, @pathetiic-fallacy, @shojobro, @blood-stricken, @itsumoghoul, @taco-belle-of-the-ball, @punkwyrm, @realstephenking, @peachbotttom, @cvirus, @marblejellyfish, @waggledaggle, @pramcine, @vipertooth): baby’s first discord server. i didn't know that i was going to get sucked into the homophobic clown movie, yet here i am! and i’m so lucky to have you guys to talk about it with! you are all so nice and funny and beautiful and creative and supportive!! i’m so happy to be hanging out with and getting to know you guys!!

@cherrysunflwr, @womanstan, @flowers-and-louis, @moonscanyon, @svpportive, @lovedangel, @caroussell, @loverpiano, @apoiios @lightwoodsmagic  we’re not in any gcs together, but i love talking to all of you!!! you are all so beautiful and lovely, and even if we’ve only had like one conversation, i hold it close to my heart!! you are all special, wonderful people and i look forward to getting to know you more in the new year.

and now for the rest of my mutuals!! tagging all of you would take a million years, and i,,,, have stuff to do today. i don't know how people do it. is there a secret that i don't know? or do y’all just have the patience to go through your list of followers, type them all out, and organize them alphabetically? but anyway, just know that if we’re mutuals on here, you have positively impacted my life and i consider us friends. feel free to message me any time!! if there’s one good thing that can come out of this hell website, it’s friendship (and what a perfect cheesy sentence to end this long ass post!). happy new year, everyone!! <3

[normal-horoscopes]

Hey I never realized this, but is your blog header the Lady? She looks very pretty, and if I may ask who drew her? I offer some matches, broken earbuds and a throw blanket.

@maggi-mee DREW HER!

[zodiac-trollsonas]

Few things going on with me and Mod Sal. We're both making at least three trolls based on our sun, moon and rising zodiacs.

The blogs url is going to be changed as soon as we can think, and agree on something. We're going to be making introduction posts for all the trolls as well as have introductions on our carrd.

Header and pfp have yet to be decided, tho we both have ideas.

- Mod Maggy

More trolls may be added in the future if we decide we need more or if we simply just want to 🤷

And this could happen at any point along the line of this blog being active so always be on the lookout for new additions

-Mod Sal

#update