#me: yeah im gonna chill out and do some cute sketches | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

urtrickster · 6 months

Text

markate thoughts i am poorly compiling into this post

gone gone gone markate is real and it's so sweet and sad and bittersweet and just mark and kate being so soso in love with each other and mark continuing to love kate long after she dies at the murder castle. i could write a fic for this if i were brave enough

tunnels au. remember that? i had a thought of mark and erin swapping places w jamie and kate nd being the ones to survive that night and just. kate dying in mark's arms as he begs her to stay awake. they had only just made up with each other, finally back together. it can't end here, it can't. but it does, with kate sacrificing herself to make sure mark made it out alive.

not really a thought just. sometimes i listen to the boy who could fly and it'll. just. 'i guess i never should have loved you, but i do forever 'cause you love me' + 'if you were gonna leave this world, how could it be without me?' + 'now it's all over my tongue and it still has no taste, 'cause without you, there is no me' markate.

imagine kate surviving and mark dying. imagine, in her grief, kate continuously dreams of mark. imagine dream mark trying to help kate move on. imagine it.

dark mermaid aus r where it's at just mark nearly fuckin drowning in the ocean after trying to take some nice photos only to be saved by mermaid kate and kate is like 'well i was going to eat you but you looked all scared and worried over that weird box of yours being in the water and it made me curious so im letting you live for now' and mark is like 'what the fuck' and then they fall in love

werewolf kate vampire mark that's it that's the thought

just a cute domestic scene of markate staying in for the day and existing together. mark occasionally taking a photo of kate here and there because he just can't help himself. kate asking mark for advice on scripts.

u know what fuck it kate can draw really really well and i think she likes drawing mark. mark takes photos of her and kate sketches him out.

sometimes i like to imagine that mark can play the acoustic guitar, y'know? so i'll sometimes just picture him absently playing the guitar while kate sits with him and just listens. doesn't matter what he's playing, she just sits there and admires him while he plays.

mark and kate still broken up but still very aware of each other's habits and preferences so well that whenever someone else needs to get something for one of them, they go to the other for advice.

markate the 30th by billie eilish.

but also markate i don't care if you're contagious by pierce the veil. yeah.

more on werewolf kate vampire mark. everyone literally everyone expects their roles to be swapped and are Very surprised when they see mark sipping on a blood bag with a massive fucking werewolf just chilling next to him.

kate having a nightmare. her and mark aren't together anymore but she still finds herself calling mark for comfort because hearing his voice always calms her down. mark always answers, and the moment he hears her voice he's dropping everything and showing up at her apartment in the middle of the night w some food and some shitty romcoms

markate at jerin's wedding and kate catches the bouquet.

okay now picture an au where tdim doesn't happen and markate didn't know each other. picture kate having a cute adorable little chihuahua that she takes to the dog park every week. imagine mark being at the dog park as well w connie. the chihuahua and connie become best friends which in turn means mark and kate see each other often and get to know each other. the dogs are matchmakers is what im saying.

i think mark and kate have 100% pretended to be a married couple for one reason or another. we don't know what happened in topeka. anything we want could've happened in topeka.

mark 100% teaches himself about crystals and shit and he 100% buys kate crystals bc the way her eyes light up and the smile on her face when he does is all worth it

me and kearney once talked abt mark having a youtube channel where he mostly talked about cameras and photography but occasionally played a game here and there w jamie and i just imagine kate being his number one fan that's all.

i actually think markate would thrive in a zombie apocalypse. don't ask where this came from im listening to speed by atari teenage riot and it made me think of zombies bc of lollipop chainsaw it's a whole thing anyways yeah markate zombie apocalypse au

uhhhh that's all i can think about rn.

#the thoughts.#markate #mark x kate #mark nestor #kate wilder #katherine wilder #tdim #the devil in me

9 notes · View notes

patt-writes-stuff · 3 years

Text

Beach Days with The Genshin Characters!

Wc: 1.7k+

Type: Headcanons

CW: umm nothing except mentions of alcohol and maybe people being creeps? (None of the chars or you tho it’s very brief)

A/N: HI IM BACK FROM THE DEAD! These were supposed to be a lot shorter but I got too excited. If you by any chance wanna see some for your fav character lmk! I know it says request are closed in my bio but since it’s just hcs it’s a lot less (and I really enjoyed writing these so ajdhdhdk)

🔥Diluc:

This man cannot swim. Tell me otherwise, I dare you.

Kaeya tried to jokingly push him off a lil diving cliff area when they were kids.

He almost drowned. Kaeya was in a lot of trouble.

So, good luck getting this man to actually get in the water. The most he’ll do is sit on the shore where it’s very shallow.

He usually prefers to just stay under an umbrella on the sand and keep an eye on you.

Calls you every two hours in advance and helps you reapply sunscreen.

He’s very pale so I feel like he burns pretty easily, meaning he needs to reapply super frequently otherwise he will become a tomato. He brings like three bottles of the good shit. Tch, rich boy.

If you ask him to build a sandcastle, he will pretend to be annoyed but do it anyways. Ends up finding it kind of enjoyable.

He has the maids prepare a nice picnic basket for the two of you!! It’s got all your favorite foods plus grape juice cuz y’know.

If any creepy peeps approach you, don’t worry. He brought his vision and his claymore.

Of course, he won’t have to resort to such violent lengths. Everyone in Mondstadt knows who Diluc is and they probably know you’re his s/o, so they’re usually smart enough to mind their own business.

If they don’t, don’t worry. Diluc’s glare is more than enough to scare them away.

All in all I definitely recommend a beach day with him! I’ll give it a solid 8/10 (-2 for not wearing floaties and getting in the water with you or letting you teach him how to swim.

🖌Albedo:

You guys definitely 100% take Klee out with you on a beach day.

You guys bring snacks, beach toys like buckets and shovels for optimal sandcastle building, a picnic blanket, etc.

Jean definitely packs a lot more stuff for you guys to take with you than you actually need.

It’s only cuz she’s worried for Klee and is nervous about not being able to go with you guys though! It’s very sweet really.

Klee tries to bomb the fish and cause havoc at the beach 😭

I think Albedo is a good swimmer and gets in with you and Klee so that he can help her (which is very cute omfg)

He’s set total workaholic, as we know, so it took a lot of convincing to get him to put down his experiments and accompany you to the beach (however, he’s particularly weak to yours and klee’s puppy dog eyes so he caved eventually)

Though, looking at you and Klee happily building sandcastles and decorating them with pretty seashells of all shapes and colors, he can’t really find it in himself to complain.

He, of course, takes this opportunity to take out his sketchbook and draw the waves, seagulls, you… Of course he won’t let you see the sketch book no sir. He’s a bit embarrassed to be honest, but an artist such as himself recognizes beauty when he sees it so he simply had to draw you. (God I love him so much)

If a creepy person approaches you,- well don’t worry. The sight of a small arsonist child blowing up fish is enough to scare them away 🥰

At the end of the day, all three of you are all ticketed out. Albedo has to carry Klee back to Mondstadt because the poor baby fell asleep the moment you started drying her hair with the beach towel. You’re, of course, carrying back Dodoco and your bags. (You also manage to sneak a peak at Albedo’s sketchbook and find some very pretty drawings of you and Klee with your sandcastle)

At the end of the day, you guys tuck Klee in and read her a bedtime story (she woke up and insisted). Afterwards Albedo takes you back home and thanks you for coming with you and Klee (which you ofc say wasn’t a problem because how could you not???)

All in all? I’ll give it a solid 10/10. You’ve got tasty food, fun times, your boyfriend and his cute kid adoptive sister (yes I am very biased idc)

🦋Xiao:

I think it would take a lot of convincing to get Xiao to go out on a beach date with you.

He’ll probably see it as a distraction getting in the way of his slaying of monsters and demons.

However, he also worships the grounds you walk on (hehe, simp XD), so I don’t think it’ll take that much convincing on your part (especially because it’s is self appointed duty to keep you safe so if you insist on going with or without him, he supposes he’ll have to go)

Is definitely a bit tense at first. He doesn’t know how to let loose and chill so while you’re sun tanning on a beach chair he’s like 🧍‍♂️ahdgshjsjd

Eventually calms down a bit though! You get him to relax and eat some almond tofu you brought along with you. It definitely gets him to perk up.

I don’t think he would mind getting into the water but I do think he’d rather walk along the shore and collect pretty seashells and sea glass.

He later gives the ones he deems pretties to you (he hands them over to you with a blush on his face and pretends it’s not a big deal and he definitely gets all pouty and grouchy when you coo at how adorable he is)

As for creeps, Xiao is both intimidating and well known in Liyue. No one is brave enough (or, let’s be honest, dumb enough) to approach you with any bad intentions.

Sure, Xiao has sworn never to harm a human/citizen of Liyue but that doesn’t mean he can’t scare the absolute shit out of them.

I think Xiao would definitely enjoy a beach day 🥺🥺. He’d find it very relaxing to go out with you and just hear the sound of waves and feel the sand under his feet.

He’d definitely hint at wanting to do it again later. Of course, he won’t tell you. No, that’s a foolish mortal activity and he has much better things to do.

Wait no, don't turn around, yes he will go with you next month.

All in all, I give Xiao a 9/10. It’s a very relaxing day (which he deserves 😤). And you get to see a whole new side of him.

💎Ningguang:

OK SO ORIGINALLY I WASN'T GONNA WRITE ONE FOR HER (at least not in this post) BUT THEN I THOUGHT OF LADY NINGGUANG TAKING YOU TO A WHOLE ASS PRIVATE BEACH

She knows you don’t care about how exclusive the beach you go to is (in fact, the fact that you don’t care about where you are or what you do is one of the things that make her fall more and more madly in love with you) but you deserve the best so she’s gonna go all out.

She’s a busy lady so days like this where the two of you get to go somewhere and be together are few and far between.

She knows it’s hard to be in a relationship with someone who is busy 24/7, so she appreciates how you remain by her side despite all hardships. (Y’all are a whole ass power couple istg)

The two of you spend your day relaxing. Sun bathing, drinking piña coladas, maybe taking a dip in the ocean. It’s all very pleasant!

Ningguang doesn’t quite feel like the type of person who would sit in the sand and make sandcastle, however you’re more than welcome to make some yourself. She finds it endearing <3

If you insist on her helping, she’ll eventually comply. She loves you too much to say no. I feel like she’ll either be terrible at it or like a total architect.

Sand is technically like tiny rocks right? So maybe she can use her vision to help her? If that’s the case, she’s making a replica of the Jade chamber out of sand.

If any creepy person comes up to you don’t worry. Ningguang will buy the whole beach and then use her right of admission as owner to permanently ban them from the beach you’re at.

The only downside to a day at the beach with Ningguang might be that there’s a big chance she’ll be called to tend urgent matters, seeing as she is the Tianquan of the Liyue Qixing and all.

If that does happen, she’ll be sure to make it up to you somehow, whether it be rescheduling or taking care of the matter as soon as possible so that the two of you can get back to your day of relaxation and fun.

All in all?? Lady Ningguang will treat you like total royalty and the two of you will have an amazing time! I give her an 11/10 (she would literally buy a whole beach for you to be comfortable I mean c’mon)

🍃Venti:

BEACH DAYS WITH HIM ARE SO FUN!!

Swimming? Yeah, he’d love to! Sunbathing? Sure! He’ll ever conjure up a light breeze for the two of you. Sandcastle building? WELL OF COURSE WHY DO YOU THING HE BROUGHT ALL THESE BUCKETS AND SHOVELS?

No but seriously, he might be the best person out of everyone here to go to the beach with. He’s fun, free spirited, and he’s a traveling bard who’s been alive long enough to know where all the best beaches in Teyvat are. (He also knows a guy- er, well, dragon I suppose- who is willing to fly them to any place).

He’ll play some soft tunes while you doze under the sun.

HE PICKS PRETTY SHELLS AND GIFTS THEM TO YOU!!!

He will bring booze. I’m pretty sure this is a necessity. If you’re a little upset about it, he’ll probably “eheh~” his way out of it. That slick bastard.

If you really insist on him not drinking, he won’t consume much alcohol.

If some creepy person approaches you and tries to ruin you your day of beach time fun, all of their stuff will suddenly be blown away, causing them to scramble back to their spot and (almost embarrassingly) flail around trying to catch everything. What a shame…

At the end of the day, he’d be a little sad to leave. Definitely makes plans about tbe two of you going back soon.

I gotta give him a 10/10 he’s just so fun omg.

596 notes · View notes

rotshop · 3 years

Note

your drawing of Wank gushing about the reader reminded me how much I love her, so if you can, could you do some headcanons of Wank with the reader, doesnt matter which reader you want to use, animalperson, employeer, go wild. we just need more Wank simp juice

-Abstract

SO ,,, i m combining these two asks for the sake of ease ,,, i got a third wank req but i might do that later today idk ,,,,,,,, 4 now u get these </3

[ tw ; one very very brief and non-detailed mention of violence ]

-chances are you two just kinda. ran into one another at some point. you were probably in some of your own trouble with the aahw for one reason or another. it's essentially incident 010a

-chances ALSO are u were kinda horrified when u first seen her, u've gotta recognize her and idk man !! having someone who could easily snap your neck looming over you and just staring down at you isn't!! super reassuring!! :[ you don't even know if she's really listening as you're trying to plead ur case (and y'know. for your life.) because she's just ,, not reacting at all. she's just staring down at you in silence, you can't really see anything of her eyes behind the goggles and it's just making it worse. eventually though, you're cut off by her just picking you up and throwing you over your shoulders with an almost embarrassing amount of ease

-SO YEA ,,, i hope you like getting carried around like a sack of flour and unable to really do much at all, i mean, u can TRY and squirm around or hit at her backc but it usually just results in her tightening her grip on you :[ congrats to u tho because unlike her counterpart / sibling in incident 010a she HASN'T thrown you around !! so enjoy that at least

-eventually, you're allowed to see nevada from a normal view again when you get tossed in the back seat of a car. u don't get the chance to really think too in depth abt the idea when she's already stopping you, making a little 'watching you' gesture before she shuts the door on you. yeah its. not a great first meeting :[

-after u get brought back to her little base of sorts and get questioned by some others (who, are luckily a little bit less physical and generally intimidating), u just kinda. hang around. they've decided ur not a threat and its not like you really have anywhere else to go, aahw would probably just hunt ur ass down again anyway, esp considering you've been seen w/ wank now

-she starts to warm up to you a little more after the fact. you notice really early on that she's actually a lot more emotive and animated when she isn't tearing an agent a new one !! (granted, that's. pretty animated in its own right) she's still got that air of intimidation but for the most part she's pretty light-hearted, so!! it's not as surprising when she keeps checking up on u

-at first u just kinda excuse it as 'oh, she's probably just wondering if i got hurt or if im doing anything sketch' but she just kinda. walks in, asks if ur ok and then just stands there. you can tell there's always something a little bit off but she's usually walking off before you can point it out though. there is one time though where instead of walking off she just kinda. walks over to you, if you have any hobbies like reading, writing, or drawing then that's what she asks about first. she asks if she can watch you / read with you for a little while and so you both just kinda. chill like that. it's a little uncomfortable at first since there's not too much room between you and her on your bed but,,it works (or. yknow. you can always just sit between her legs and have her wrap her arms around ur waist and kinda rest her head on top of urs :flushed:)

-it becomes a routine of sorts after that, she'll come check up on you, see how you're doing, then come lie down with you. it's just..nice, in a way. it helps her calm down a little and she just likes being around you for some reason !! a fully platonic reason of course, you're just her friend who she sometimes thinks about kissing and who she can't help but think about your smile or the way your laugh sounds even when you're not around, fully in a just kinda friends way of course !! nothing more to it and the way she can't help but get giddy whenever she's talking about you !!! bestie behavior. yeah she talks to someone abt how she feels and it takes everything in them to not double over in laughter

-she eventually goes 'hm! fuck!' and realizes she's in gay love w/ u lmao. she's. pretty lost on how to go abt that and it reaaally doesn't help that you both are rlly affectionate w/ one another, so it just makes it harder for her to tell if the feelings are returned or not ,,, chances are she just kinda spontaneously confesses in her own kind-of-nerve-wracking way when you're both hanging out alone. she just kinda. cups ur face and makes you look at her and blurts out some 'i love you' or something

-N E WAY ,,, onto more mismatched hcs.

-she doesn't train w/ you very often since she's nervous about hurting you or exhausting you, she knows ur strong and you can take a lot but,,she still gets a little paranoid about it. however , she does enjoy you watching her train w/ others !! this isn't fun for them however because she does unintentionally go a little harder to impress you lmao ,, wank is not immune to favoritism and it shows

-like said before, she's very affectionate with you and she's not afraid to be so around others. if ur in her viscinity she just!! gotta hold u, its the law man. she just likes wrapping an arm or two around you and pulling you back against her, usually leaves a lot of little kisses on your temple or on top of ur head ,, it's worse if you fluster easily, hope u like being kissed a lot and being picked up bc she WILL do so just to see ur reaction ,, on the bright side though you do get to hear her laugh a lot more often since ur just that cute to her

-not at all shy abt her relationship w/ you and she wears it proudly on her sleeve, she cares abt u so so much and she genuinely adores you, it's written clear as day in any interaction you two have with one another so!! like hell she's gonna try and hide it

#wank x reader #white hank x reader #madcom x reader #madcom imagines #madness combat imagines #madness combat x reader #rot writes #abstract anon

130 notes · View notes

meltwonu · 4 years

Text

| caffeine | [chapter 2]

pairing; fratboy!wonwoo x female!reader

this chapter’s notes; oral(male receiving), dirty talk, wonwoo having a size kink 😩🥴 💕 y’all!! thank you so much for all the love on my fratboy!wonwoo au im literally------- so !!!! I love yall so much you don't even know 😩😩😩

chapters; 1 - 2 - x - x - x

When Minghao asks you to accompany him to the library on a Wednesday morning, you contemplate pretending you slept through that message if it meant not having to see Wonwoo again. You hadn’t been back since then, scrambling to collect all your things from your study table as you promptly left and didn’t look back.

There was a part of you that still couldn’t believe everything that had happened and even questioned if it really happened. But there was also a part of you that craved more and wanted to see him again despite being unsure.

Minghao texts you a few more times, knowing that you’re free on Wednesdays and almost never sleep in.

You finally give in after the 7th attempt, muttering under your breath as you toss on some clothes, texting Minghao you’ll meet him at the campus coffee shop in 20 minutes.

“I thought you’d never show up, slowpoke.”

You give Minghao a side hug, adjusting the big shirt and shorts you decided to throw on. “Yeah, well I made it, didn’t I? It’s not like I don’t love seeing your face, but why exactly did you ask me to come anyway?” The male shrugs, already walking towards the direction of the library. “Mingyu managed to snag a retake on that exam he failed last time so he couldn’t make it and I just like company and a second opinion when I work sometimes.” The two of you fall into idle chatter; laughing about Mingyu’s horrendous luck when it came to being on time for his classes.

“I mean, I told him beer pong on a school night wasn’t the brightest idea, but you know him, hates to lose against Jihoon.”

“How do you do it? Like, how do you exist around these dudes and not lose your shit?”

“Dunno, maybe it’s the free booze when I do want it. And let’s be real, the notoriety ain’t so bad either.”

You scoff, jokingly rolling your eyes before you take notice that you’ve already arrived at the dreaded location. Noticing you’ve gone quiet, Minghao turns to you, hand already on the doors.

“You okay? Why do you look so weirded out?” You shake your head at him, giving him a weak smile as he opens the door for you, letting you in first. “Thanks.”

Your eyes immediately scan around, searching for the silver haired bespectacled man, and to your mild disappointment, you don’t find him anywhere.

Minghao finds an empty table and begins setting down his books, taking out a sketch pad and his earbuds as he settles in.

“We’re gonna be here a while, so you better find something to do.”

Something to do, for you, means being Minghao’s errand girl when he asks you to find a couple books on colour theory; claiming he needs them while he continues to sketch and prepare his next painting. And like a good friend, you do, jotting down book titles and their locations before you head off.

You weave through bookshelves, getting closer to the part of the emptier part of the library that Wonwoo had taken you before and your body instinctively begins to heat up at the memory. You shake your head at the thoughts, moving past the shelves until you come upon the aisle with the books you’d need to gather for Minghao. FInding one, you pick it off the shelf, tucking it under your arm while you search for the next.

“Do you need a hand?”

The deep voice causes you to drop the book as you turn to face the silver haired male leaning up against the opposite shelf. “Fuck, do you have to s-scare me!?” The smirk on Wonwoo’s face is enough to send you blushing as you lean down to pick up the fallen object. “Aww, thought it’d be cute to surprise you for a little payback, sweetheart. After all, you did leave so quickly last time.” You bite the inside of your cheek, suddenly shy and refusing to make eye contact. “I… had to finish my--my essay…”

“I’m sure you did. I’m sure you didn’t just go home and think about me… Right? You were just a good little girl, weren’t you? You didn’t go home and get those cute fingers all wet from fingering yourself? Or maybe you got out some of your favorite toys, hmm? Didn’t pretend they were me instead?”

Wonwoo pushes off the shelf he’s leaning on to back you into a familiar position.

“Because I’ll be honest with you, sweetheart, I went home and thought about you all night. How that pussy would be so tight around me. And how fuckin’ small you’d be underneath me takin’ my big cock. And how you’d be such a good ‘lil thing and take all of it and then get it nice and wet for me when I make you fall apart.” He cages you against the shelf, leaning down to nose at your neck. “And how you’d keep begging me for more.”

You can’t help the moan that escapes you, your eyes fluttering shut at Wonwoo’s filthy words as he softly kisses your neck. “Mmh, Wonwoo…”

“But you were so selfish last time, y’kno? Didn’t even ask if I needed to cum. Just took your things and ran off. And I don’t like bad girls, sweetheart. So I’m going to have to punish you a little bit, won’t I?” Wonwoo slots a leg in between yours as he pressed into you, his cock already hard in his slacks. “But you want to be punished, don’t you?” Wonwoo pulls back, using his fingertips to tilt your head up. “Look at me, sweetheart. I want to know that you want this.” Your eyes immediately lock onto his, pupils already blown wide and panties already wet and all he’d done is talk to you.

“Yes… I--I want this. I want you.”

The library carpet is rough and makes your knees hurt while Wonwoo tugs on your hair, pushing you further down onto his cock. Your hands are neatly clasped behind your back as he uses your mouth to get off.

You’re convinced by now that Minghao’s sure you’ve just left with how long you’ve been “looking for those books”.

“Fuck, look at you, your mouth can barely take my cock. How’s your tight little pussy going to?” There’s a chuckle at the end of his words as he holds you down onto his cock, restricting your breathing. Your throat closes around him as he moans; the sounds music to your ears as you clench around nothing. The wetness is already pooling in your panties and you really just want to slide your hands into your shorts and relieve yourself.

Wonwoo lets up, giving you a second to catch your breath as he pulls you off of his cock; your eyes teary as you cough. He tilts your head up, admiring your teary eyes and swollen lips. “You’re really pretty like this, y’kno?” He grins down at you, licking his own lips. “Bet you just want me to fuck you now, huh?”

“Y-yeah…” “Well, that’s too bad. Now, open your mouth. And don’t make a mess.” You pout up at him as he gently tugs on your hair in warning. He guides his cock towards your lips as you stick out your tongue to lick the head. Slowly, you work his cock back into your mouth, hollowing out your cheeks around him until he hits the back of your throat again.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum soon.” You moan around Wonwoo, the vibrations sending chills up his spine as his grip on your hair tightens. He shallowly thrusts into your mouth as you hollow your cheeks around him. You can’t help the way your thighs rub together to try and satisfy yourself; hoping Wonwoo doesn’t notice.

“Fu--Fuck, I’m c-cumming, don’t--don’t swallow it, sweetheart, I want to see it in that mouth of yours.” Humming around him, you listen; the salty substance meeting your tongue as he fills your mouth with it.

Wonwoo slides his cock from your mouth, a trail of saliva connecting the head of it to your lips.

“Open your mouth, let me see it.” You open your mouth, showing him all the cum in your mouth as he hums appreciatively. “Swallow it.” Wonwoo’s eyes are hyper focused on you when you do, opening your mouth again to show him you’ve swallowed all of it.

“Good girl.”

When you trudge back to Minghao’s table with all the books he asked for, you hope to god he doesn’t notice that you’d been crying and choking on Wonwoo’s cock.

You set the books down next to him as he tugs a earbud out, giving you a look before he picks up one of the books and pries it open.

“Hey, you okay? Why are your knees all beat up?”

“Oh, um, the books were on the lower shelves so I… I had to get on my knees for them and, ykno.. Look. I, uh, had a hard time finding them.”

He hums, sticking the earbud back into place as he quietly goes back to work.

“Well, at least you were on your knees helping me find books and not sucking dick, right?”

You freeze, awkwardly laughing as your panties sticking to your folds uncomfortably from when you came untouched with Wonwoo’s cock down your throat.

“Haha, yeah. True.”

#fratboy!wonwoo #wonwoo smut #seventeen smut #svt smut #wonwoo scenarios #wonwoo imagines #seventeen imagines #svt imagines #seventeen scenarios #svt scenarios

483 notes · View notes

cluelesslesbian · 3 years

Text

Check-In Tag✨

AKA a very long post about moi and this account bc I was tagged by the lovely @katelfiredemon <3

IF YOU SEE THIS, PRETEND I'M TAGGING U like this is completely optional (and long omg) so I don't wanna FORCE anyone to do it but asjhkl I think it's cute

1. why did you choose your url?

My og url was something dumb bc I only used tumblr to keep up with artists and writers I admired… this one is revamped to be ~relatable~ bc I wanted something that I felt comfortable adding on my art?? But ok-

clueless = because THERE’S TIMES THAT I’M A LIL SLOW TO GET A JOKE SDFHJKL

lesbian = bc I’m not out to my family but my sexuality is something I like about me,,, so I wanted to acknowledge it somewhere (and the anonymity of tumblr = ideal tbh)

2. any side blogs? if you have them: name them and why you have them

I made one like yesterday lol! It’s @blue-dragon-shin-ah and it’s for Akatsuki no Yona (an anime and manga I TOTALLY rec! It’s like a historical themed fantasy, comedy, romance WITH a found family trope it’s so good)

but ngl I have no clue how to keep track of more than 1 blog so it'll be a lot more inactive than this one asdhkl

3. how long you’ve been on tumblr?

hmm according to my tumblr account it’d be 2016 since that’s the oldest post I’ve kept (I deleted everything and revamped this acc in december 2020)

BUT I did the math and I would’ve made this account in middle school so around 2013-2014 lol I don’t think I used it much until voltron was booming in like 2016-2018.. Then I lowkey stopped… until now!

4. do you have a queue tag?

oof no

……...I probably should? like 90% of my blog is queued or scheduled… but ngl I barely remember to tag posts at ALL some nights so I probably won’t (rip if that’s annoying,, but I don’t make much og content so I figure anyone following me is chill with this lol)

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

In middle school?? To see funny posts and not be pressured into having an ~online presence~ tbh. That’s literally it lol

6. why did you choose your icon?

Matching with @lesbianklance rn! and keith's expressions r hilarious

Before I just,,, chose sokka bc I love that blue boi and the edit of him had a yellow bg that I LOVED (and matched with my pink theme)

7. why did you choose your header?

Matching with @lesbianklance rn! and klance sdjfhk

Before it was just a colour palette bc I wanted my blog to be my fav colour: PINK

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

My zukka art omg- like I did one that I put effort into which I KNOW is my top post (it’s got like 600 notes??? I still can’t believe it I love that!! 🥰)

BUT MY SECOND TOP IS A POST OF REALLY REALLY ROUGH SKETCHES OF THEM AND I LOWKEY CRINGE AT IT (it’s got like 500 notes.. And I’m like… y ?? I can DO BETTER 😭)

9. how many mutuals do you have?

…...listen I’ve literally never had mutuals until this year (minus my one irl.. I love u bitch!! but u know that bc we text on other platforms too)

idek am i supposed to be keeping track??? I just smile a lot when i see the darker-tinted notifs in my activity feed

10. how many followers do you have?

hmmmmmmm ok i lowkey don’t want to answer this bc my whole love for tumblr is that followers don’t matter? You could follow me today and unfollow tmrw bc i ship something you don’t and life moves on??? So yeah no answer here

11. how many people do you follow?

1807 babeyyyy

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

...wait define shitpost- technically any original post under #yeetidk might be a shitpost cause they’re all just?? my shitty rambles tbh???

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

Sometimes i’ve got the app open allll day long but other days?? I’ll go on like once in the morning or at night just to check my notifs and then that’s it

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

lmaoo bold of you to assume i interact with anyone enough to have a fight (AKA no)

If i did tho?? I’m the type to try and come to some middle ground before dropping the issue so idk- i’m more likely to lose bc i’m willing to （づ￣3￣）

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

Wish-granting/curse stuff: no.

Politics/Donation posts: depends! I try to only reblog posts like these that I know a bit about bc I don’t really wanna contribute to misinformation ykno?

I did start tagging these posts as #important but I’m not like?? gonna be mad at anyone for not reblogging political posts (also a heads-up if you wanted to block #important: I also tag some lgbt+ stuff under there so you’ll likely miss those too, not a huuuge loss but just an fyi yknow??)

16. do you like tag games?

asdfghjkl this is honestly the first tag game i’ve ever been part of so i have no opinion 😭 tho formatting this post has been a bitch asdhjkl I gotta get back to my homework when I'm finally done this

17. do you like ask games?

I've done a grand total of 1 and I felt so?? ashgjl awkward and bad for asking people to talk to me about myself- maybe if I do one that isn't about me I'll like it more

I do love sending other people anons to compliment them when they do these games tho 😌

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

....this requires me to pay attention to people I follow more than I have been so I literally have no idea??

19. do i have a crush on a mutual?

yes. the one readings this. love u, sweetheart 😘

/jokes

I don't?? usually get crushes? idek.. thought I was aromantic for a while bc of that lmaoo (but then I got a crush on someone irl and I was like "oooh ok so maybe im just gay then")

#did i proofread any of this?? no. did I copy and paste someone else's q&a and type over it?? yup #so if u see anything kinda wack asdhklj ignore it. i gotta go back to my homework #about me #blame the coffee

11 notes · View notes

kiddiesmores · 4 years

Note

i can’t think of a good iwa req akakksksks but maybe general headcanons please 🤩

Perfect timing eh?

It gets kinda nsfw but it bounces back 😼

it’s kinda long hm? but i think i’m proud of this one!!

dedicated to : @iwaigroomi @kaidasen @b0kuto @bokuto-trash @fern-writes-ig @strawbirb

Happy birthday iwa 🥺

Iwaizumi Headcanons 😌

Ahh you met him at the beach!

The team took a trip to the beach since it’s summer!! and they wanted to play beach volley ball

You were chilling under your umbrella, protecting your friends/families things and playing on your phone/sketching in your sketchpad/reading a book (wtv you do when you’re anti social)

Maybe if you were paying attention, you would’ve seen the fuckin ball coming at you-

WHACK

“Ow, what the fuck-“

“SHITTYKAWA WATCH YOUR FUCKING SERVES!”

“IM SORRY-“

Iwa came up to you, crouching down to the level of your beach chair

”Sorry about my friend. Are you okay?” He asked.

You nodded, “Yeah i’m fine, just control it next time.”

You reached down and held the ball up for him to grab which he appreciated.

“What’s your name?” “Y/N, yours?”

“Haijime, nice to meet you y/n, sorry it had to be because that dumbass can’t control his aim” he seethed.

A small laugh left your mouth which you covered. “No worries. It be like that sometimes.”

“Hmm, you’re pretty yknow? Maybe I can get your number?”

“I dunno haijime, you sure another ball won’t hit me?”

He quirked his eyebrows

“No promises..”

The two of you exchanged numbers that!

and texted frequently aswell

He discovered that you were attending aoba johsai the following school year as a third year, while him on the other hand would be going to university

You’d hang out together frequently as friends, slowly incorporating oikawa, mattsun and makki into your sessions

“so you’re telling me-“ oikawa starts

“yes i’m telling you turtles breathe out of their butt.”

“for the love of GOD, start nemo already.”

“sorry iwa-chaaan” you both said in unison and makki and mattsun snickered

oh how you and oikawa would tag team on poor iwa

over time you found yourself slowly falling in love with him

you were the only one who could control his temper when things got bad

“fucking- shittykawa keeps bugging me all day about fucking college and im already stressed as it is-“

“shhh iwa, its okay. youre with me now” you’d say, stroking his hair. his arms would wrap around you and he’d sigh, his breathing slowed and his face tucked into your neck. “what would i do without you?” he muttered and you chuckled, “probably commit homocide”

“most likely.”

the two of you confessed one day while walking around the park at night

you both sat on the bench and a wave of goosebumps ran over your skin, causing you to shiver

“now or never.” you thought

“I like you.” “What??” “You like me too??” “Niceeee” you both said in unison LMFAO

he wasted no time pulling you into a deep kiss, then peppering kisses around your face and neck, “I’ve waited weeks for this..”

He spoiled you to death

You wanted a new hoodie? He bought you 3.

Your earbuds broke? He got you airpods.

Hungry? He’s ordering you food even if he’s not there to share it with you.

“Baby you can’t waste your money on me like this i’m not your sugar baby.”

“Mmm but you can be baby girl/boy”

Big sigh

The two of you had a plan to tell the boys you were finally together but they walked in on you and Iwa about to get frisky so that was thrown out the window 🤡

“Good angel, your mouth feels amazing, keep going.” He praised, his hand in your hair, moving to stroke your cheeks as you sucked him off with tears in your eyes.

Your mouth popped off for a split second to regain your breath, but iwa didn’t give you enough time to recover.

He pulled you off your knees and threw you onto the bed. “Could someone not handle it? Do I need to show you how a good boy/girl takes daddy’s dick?”

“Yessir, please teach me..” you’d respond, while he took your tiny hands and pinned them above you.

“Iwachaaaan~ it’s movie ni- ouuu, so you finally got the balls to ask them out huh? Don’t worry you two finish. We’ll be out here when you’re done~” oikawa smirked and closed the door.

Iwa huffed and got up to lock it.

“Iwa-“

“Hush pet, you heard him,” his mouth came close to your ear, “We’ll be out when we finish, yeah?” His teeth sucked on your lobe and you whined. “That’s my good little baby”

whew anyways

His birthday!!

He always did the most for you so now you get to do the most for him!

You baked him a cake, made dinner, invited friends, yknow. Cute shit.

“shh shh he’s coming”

you all kneeled behind the counter waiting for iwa to come in. His footsteps grew louder until he reached the kitchen, “The fuck-“

“SURPRISE!”

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY IWACHAAAN!!”

Makki snapped a picture of his face with a polaroid, snickering at the face he made.

Iwa sniffles, before tears ran down his cheeks. You ran up to him, pulling him into your arms. “Do you like it hajime..” you asked. His grip around you grew tighter, “Of course I do baby..thank you.” You smiled and kissed his cheeks.

After some gift unwrapping, it was finally time for cake!

“Why is there two?” he asked and you shrugged.

He leaned in to inspect it, “What is that-“

You shoved his face in.

Oikawa CACKLED and fell to the floor while mad dog and kindaichi snickered in the corner.

Iwa wiped the cake off his face with his hand, “You’re gonna pay for that.” he said, looking at your beaming expression.

Cute.

He smeared the cake on your face too, and laughed at your shocked expression. “Huh, this is funny.”

You pulled him in for a kiss, which really tasted like cake- and then opened the actual one, ready with candles.

You sung him happy birthday and told him to make a wish, and he blew out the candles.

Nearing the end of the night, the boys went home and it was just you and iwa on the couch. His head resting on your thigh while you stroked his hair.

“Hey,” he started, “You didn’t get me a gift.” he said, poking your stomach.

You nodded, “I did, but I don’t know if you deserve it.”

He quirked his brow, “Oh?”

You stood up and started to walk towards the bedroom,

“You coming?”

tags!! @ohimagine for the cake shoving idea!!! thank you bae

#haikyuu #haikyuu!!#iwaizumi x gn #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi hajime #haikyuu iwaizumi #hq headcanons #hq imagines #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smut #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu imagines #kiddieanswers #kiddiewritez

150 notes · View notes

disaster-fruit · 3 years

Note

could you tell us more about the brarg family au with the 3 babies and trans luci?

I definitely can! This au has been living rent free in my head since i started that drawing and I was actually sketching more stuff for the AU right before I got this ask so- I definitely can ramble more about it

This was supposed to be just a collection of a few hcs and now it’s a multi-pages word document the size of a fanfic so – Im really sorry.

I didn’t think a lot about their backstories tbh, though I have it in my mind that Luciano transition in his late teens and that he and martin either met after that or knew each other before luciano came out, lost all contact, and then met again after (and you can blame oxiosas fic for that yeah im not even subtle)

But I imagine them having some sort of meet cute and kinda progressing really fast in their relationship without realizing – yk, its just a fling, no big deal, yeah ive met his parents, yes I basically spend every weekend in his apartment, yeah I have a spare key now, ops I guess we’re adopting dogs and plants together- oh I think we’re married. Yeah. We’re married.

Ok but for real Luci does the proper proposal-with-a-ring-and-knelt-down-on-a-special-day thing and Martin is just bright red saying yes over and over again

It is Afonso (port) the first to be all WHERE ARE MY GRANDCHILDREN like… the night of their wedding.

They live in a house in a not too big city with two dogs, one cat, one parrot and all the birds that Luciano feeds and names that aren’t actually theirs. Still, they choose the house with two spare rooms because they always talked about having two kids.

In this AU they can buy a nice house and don’t have to worry about money and can raise kids like the world isn’t ending.

I think right after they got married they got in line for adoption. However, everything indicated that it would take a long long time so they started talking about the possibility of trying to have a biological kid. I think luci was the one to suggest it when he noticed martin had been thinking about it but not saying anything for a while.

Lots of boring doctor visits and confused doctors looking at luciano and trying to process it like the dumb cishets they are. Boring exams and all that, but everything is on track eventually, luci pauses his hrt and keeps his jockstrap on the drawer and they’re googling the best positions for fertility on those weird cishet sites and doing it like bunnies etc etc

Getting pregnant the natural way after years of testosterone is not the easiest thing in the world, so it takes a while. But eventually it works.

Both of them are kinda freaking out with this whole first pregnancy thing. Martin is the ultimate protective husband, and spends way too much time on the internet finding out what luciano can and can’t eat, what exercises he should do, and going to every single doctor visit. He’s very committed to it.

Luciano has to drink non-alcoholic beer and hates life. There’s a single teardrop shed every time he buys it. And drinks a lot of lemonade like it’s the same as caipirinha. Poor guy. Martin doesn’t help on that, life isn’t fair, he buys his own beer.

But he also has to drive absurd lengths to find the weirdest fruit or make the most hideous, blasphemous pizza toppings because Luciano is constantly craving absurd shit. But poor baby actually really NEEDS that chicken M&M pizza at 8am.

They’re super proud daddies though, and both their instagrams at this point are just baby belly pictures. Luci had top surgery on this au on my hc so also. Lots of shirtless pics. He looks like an old uncle with a beer belly and he’s PROUD. Just. Baby bellies all over.

Martin picks the entire baby layette. Because of course he does.

Their baby shower is a huge deal though. Their dads are there, Antonio brings an entire trunk filled with diapers and tells everyone how many tincho used to need when he was a baby, Afonso is cooking for everyone and talking about how he’s gonna be a grandfather (!!!). Iracema (pindorama) is scolding Luci about his bad habits while also quietly being a super proud grandma. Zola (angola) bought toys because she knows that’s what kids actually like, Samero (Mozão) keeps asking if they installed all the necessary security stuff in their house – we will, chill, we still have some months to go – Vera (Tomé) is teasing Simão (Timor) about him no longer being the family baby, Fatima (g.bissau) is another one who bought a huge amount of diapers, Rosinha (cabo verde) is taking pictures of everyone and everything, Sebas and Dani are discussing if the kid should speak Portuguese or Spanish, Maria brought a huge pink plushy as a gift, it’s quite a party.

Once they’re late in the pregnancy, Luciano mostly spends his time on Martin’s oversized t-shirts asking for foot rubs and not getting much sleep because the baby keeps moving. Martin on the other hand is a little nervous about being a dad, but absolutely loves feeling the little kicks and talking to the baby all the time, except when its 3am and he wants to sleep but Luci cant because of it so he just does his best to keep him company. He mostly ends up falling asleep on his chest though and doesn’t help much

I wrote all of this but I still don’t have a name for the girl lol Anyway, she’s finally born, and if martin was overprotective when Luciano was pregnant, he’s ten times more with his baby girl. Tbh theyre both kinda going crazy with this whole parenting thing, both are overprotective, tired, and have no idea what theyre doing.

Zola and Sebastian are the girl’s godparents. Sebastian isn’t very good with kids so when he takes care of his niece he either puts on a tv show and lets her eat whatever crap she wants, or relies on Daniel to do the actual taking care, since he is good with kids.

Luciano and Martin are very much neurotic first-timers and have all this schedule of what their girl can eat and when and when she has to sleep etc etc.

When Zola takes care of her, she just ignores it and does it her way. She helped raised Luci since he was a baby anyway, he survived just fine and even married and reproduced, she knows what to do better than both the dumbasses, and they never even find out.

Afonso on the other had follows everything when he’s with his granddaughter, determined to be a better grandfather than he was a father, and the baby loves him so he’s doing a good job.

They’re a very cute family yes yes

She grows up well and happy, a bit shy maybe but very smart and sweet, loves the dogs and her aunts and uncles and granddads (afonso more than antonio though)

By the way, Iracema is soft like butter with her granddaughter.

When she’s about four or five years old they start talking about having a second one, considering the age difference and all. So back to doctors, Luci stops the hrt again and they go back to trying, but again it’s not the easiest thing in the world to do it naturally after years of hrt.

But god listens to the prayers of such good catholic family, and right after they start thinking about a second child, they receive the news they will finally get to adopt a baby.

Luciano is the one to receive the news, he’s working at home when the social worker comes to tell him they can finally adopt. He’s extremely happy, he hugs the poor lady and is barely able to concentrate as she explains the paperwork that is left and the details of it because he can’t stop smiling.

He immediately texts martin saying something like “CALL ME RIGHT NOW WE NEED TO TALK” and it’s in happy caps but martin understands it wrong and thinks someone is dying or dead but then his phone is what dies so he gets home as fast as he can thinking all the worst scenarios just to find luciano jumping on him with a smile for ear to ear. It’s such a shock he takes a while to react but when he does you have two idiots so happy they can’t function.

It’s another girl, she has big brown eyes like her sister and it’s a few months old.

They quickly reassemble the crib and paint the second room to get everything ready in time to take her home, and the next week or so it’s nothing but all the family visiting to meet their new baby.

Since they managed to adopt, they decided to stop trying to have another kid. Luciano goes back to the doctor do some routine exams so that he can go back to testosterone and the doctor just awkwardly explains that, well, that won’t be exactly possible. Not for the next eight months, at least.

He’s quite shocked at that, and takes him a while to tell martin. They just got a new baby and do they even have space to raise three kids? Eventually it just escapes from him and martin is shocked as well, but ultimately both of them are just worried about their place being too small, and once they relax about that they can’t shut up about having another baby on the way to anyone.

Still, it’s not easy to manage, martin is just as worried as he was with their eldest, except that this time he’s simultaneously worried about their new baby and about Luci’s pregnancy. Poor dude needs a break asap. So he’s trying to do most of the work of caring for a little baby to spare luciano from the stress, while also taking care of him as well as he did the other time.

Luci is more chill about being pregnant, he’s done this before, he’s fine. He’s even a little too chill about it, as shown in the art, he still wants to carry their kid on his shoulder and having a few sips of martin’s beer is no big deal and honestly he’s fine, he can help with the baby, and Tincho just needs to relax and it will all be fine.

Again, poor tincho needs a break.

Some things don’t change though. Them being super proud daddies who do nothing but take pictures of their kids and Luci’s belly every chance they get. And they’re really happy and excited to have their house full and this big family.

Just a good cute family AU where nothing bad ever happens thank you very much. Yet it took me almost 2k words to say it. I have no self control and I’m very sorry. However, if anyone has their own hcs to add about this whole au, I will be more than happy to hear and talk about this AU even more than I’ve already done.

20 notes · View notes

chat-noir-always-here · 4 years

Text

I rewatch Miraculous—Mr. Pigeon

Behold!!! The episode that almost made me stop watching Miraculous.

No for real i think i got up and left the room first time around, this episode was so ridiculous.

• “You only have one day to work on your fashion piece.” Only a day? That seems kinda unrealistic when you take into account designing, gathering materials, whether or not you need to go out and buy any materials, the amount of time it takes to actually put all that together...

•WHOA Gabriel’s actually smiling in that pic Mrs. Bustier shows. Er, smiling-ish

•Pure cinnamon roll child seems proud this peppermint frappucino dickhead is his father (Gabriel ur hair looks like whipped topping and that tie doesnt help). BE GRATEFUL FOR SUCH A CARIBG CHILD YOU PRICK!!!

•Maaaaaariii chill the fuck out your overactive imagination and severe anxiety are getting the better of you.

•AHEM Gabriel has a purple bowtie in Mari’s imagination instead of that ridiculous peppermint scarf he uses to hide Nooroo’s broach???

•Adrien: appears out of nowhere

Marintette: jerks and flops away like a fish on dry land

Me: lol bye Marinette

• Adriens beuatiful face when Mari is talking to him (before she blunders and stumbles with her words) is beautiful

•Mari’s beautiful face when Adrien is telling her “you’re so talented Marinette!” and the subtle tremor in her eyes as they widen with her smile...☺️😊😘i love my beautiful, anxious mess of a daughter

•Mari: Follows Adrien with her eyes like an owl. LMAO.

•Chloe does not deserve Sabrina 😒

•Whereas Gabriel resembles a peppermint frap, Hawk Moth/Papillion appears to be the result of what might happen if Batman and the riddler had a baby

•Ramier, bruh, there is like. Zero. Fucking. Reason to be that upset over not being allowed to feed pigeons. For real. Go feed them on some rooftop somewhere if you must. No reason to let Hawk Daddy akumatize you over it...

...

...You know what? We’re not calling Gabriel “daddy.”

EVER. Again.

•Also Hawk-shitface, pigeon dude is your worst idea and you keep coming back to him. Seriously at least put some effort into your champions’ outfits. Youre a fashion designer for petes sake!

• wow this show really loves its skin-tight body suits, huh? Even when they look ridiculous.

•Sabrina how the hell much did you have to pay for a cellphone that lets you zoom in on a fucking sketch from dozens of feet away and score yourself a crystal-clear image???

•Sabrina: “We’re soooo awesome!”

Chloe: “We?”

Chloe does NOT deserve Sabrina.

•Arent real bird feathers full of germs and bacteria that cause diseases? And Marinette “im immune to bird flu” Dupain-Cheng just plucked that shit up off the ground and put it on her hat of all things. I dont know whether to be fisgusted or impressed.

•Chat “paint me like one of your French girls” Noir for the win everybody

• “Im allergic to feathers.” I came across a theory on tumblr once (cant find the OP) that this coulda been caused by Emilie wearing the damaged Peacock broach when she was pregnant with him. If thats true i would be pleased😏

•Allow me to channel Chloe for this comment: LB, CN, that disguise is about as convincing as Mr. Pigeon and Bubbler’s get ups are appealing. In other words, NO.

•Chat Noir moonwalking with a hat on—booiii got some moves. 👌👌👌👌

• “You’re the cat dont you eat [pigeons] for breakfast?!” No LB, Kitty Boi is a domestic kitty otherwise he’d present to you little dead things like my cat used to do before we stopped letting him go out. This is an awful joke but SPARE THE BIRDS, theyre just like Ramier—being controlled by a monster.

• “On the count of three my beloved pigeons will commence fire.” As disgusting as pigeon poop is i think they’ll live. Cant you come up with a better evil plan? Threatening to break the glass floor at their feet by having the pigeons stomp on the cage would be more effective. I’m not trying to help the villain, kaay? I just prefer my villains to use their head. Honestly Team Rocket is more intimidating than Pigeon Dude.

•is it just me or is kitty boi especially adorable in this episode??? 😻😻😻

• flock of pigeons put a dent ten times the size of kitty boi’s head in the door

Okay thats actually kinda terrifying. What woulda happened if that attack hit a normal person wearing no magical armor??? They’d be pecked to bits...

• CN: “I gotta get outta here before my secret identity is revealed!”

LB: “Yeah you wouldnt wanna let the cat out of the bag!”

CN: “...Haha very funny.” 😾

Dont dish out what you cant take, handsome boy.

•LB’s look of amusement as CN starts running in place for fear of detransforming in front of others is hillarious

•kitty boi if this hotel takes tips you should really give Jean-whatshisname one. That was the speediest, life-saving room service ever.

•isnt this just Chloe’s room??? Theres a ladybug pillow on the bed and everything. Why did the mayor send CN to Chloe’s room???

• “i cant wait my dear pigeon.” Hmm reminds of later on when Hawk Moth calls Nats “My dear Mayura.” Bruh if you INTO Ramier just ask for his phone number like a normal person, quit akumatizing him and eat a damn snickers

•LB: Time for a sneak attack! Oh no, my sneak attack failed cuz my partner couldnt help but sneeze with all these FEATHERS around.

HELLO, he just told you he was allergic to feathers???

•ugh them censoring out the punches with flashy screenshots is so LAAAME show me the VIOLENCE.

• “Cat Noir! Grab [the bird call!]” AGAIN he’s ALLERGIC TO FEATHERS. Just tie that yoyo to something to keep Pigeon dude in the air and smash it yourself.

• Gabriel is that teacher from Ned’s Declassified School Survival Guide who was never physically present in class and was only ever seen through a tablet or some nonsense

•Chloe getting busted my Marinette in front of the principal, Gabriel and Adrien is a great example of how PLAGIARISM DOESNT PAY are you listening art thieves lurking on tumblr, instagram and elsewhere???

•ahem Gabriel that sympathetic look you give a weeping Chloe is very out of character

• “youre the winner Marinette.” Not gonna check out Kim and Max’s hat? You could at least look at it, doesnt seem very impartial to pick Mari without looking at ALL the hats

•siiiiiiiiiighhhhhhhh

Girl they are BOTH allergic to feathers. How many blonde teenage boys walk around with a feather allergy? Quantum Masking or no Quantum Masking, c’mon you should be at least considering the idea theyre the same person from that knowledge alone.

Annnd thats all for now. This episode is more of a vent-inducing hate sink than enjoyable, save for the gushing waterfall of cute kitty boi moments it provides. I may do Stormy Weather later today to make up for it.

#miraculous ladybug #adrien agreste #adriennette #marinette dupain cheng #mr pigeon

11 notes · View notes

punkscowardschampions · 4 years

Text

Hathor & Sekhmet

Hathor: About to slap myself so you'll feel it Hathor: wherever you are ain't where you should be Sekhmet: what im sleep Sekhmet: 😴😴😴 Hathor: wake up 👊🏽 Hathor: you asked me to meet you, remember? Sekhmet: I think that's tomorrow Sekhmet: I said Wednesday, right Hathor: That's today Hathor: you blackout past Tuesday? Sekhmet: You're joking Sekhmet: well then, that means I've got a deadline I gotta meet and not a whole lot of time for brunch dates Hathor: you're joking Hathor: I cancelled on a fine boy for you Sekhmet: it's so early you got time to hit it back Sekhmet: I know I didn't tell you I'd meet you at the crack of dawn Hathor: you didn't and you're late af still Sekhmet: chill sis, I'll make it up to you Hathor: yeah Hathor: anyone else'd be offended you don't ever want to have a sober conversation Hathor: but I'll see you in the club Sekhmet: girl, chill 😂 Sekhmet: how fine was he that you're all kinds of vexed with me Sekhmet: don't even care how I'm gonna make it up to you, oh my days 🥴🍆🧠 for real Hathor: he's got prospects, I'm not saying any more than that if you're not coming out 👅 Hathor: I'll care how you're gonna make it up when you next show up for real Sekhmet: ugh! living up to your name 🐮 Sekhmet: bitch I'm busy 😏 the juggle is real Hathor: you know I don't say that shit lightly except once in a blue moon, however fine a lad be looking Hathor: but if you don't wanna hear it Sekhmet: is he 🧑🏾🧑🏿 Hathor: 🥛 Hathor: nobody is more surprised than me Sekhmet: 👏🙌 yay Sekhmet: I told you, white boys are the best Sekhmet: they treat us like 👸 Hathor: It's his Irish accent tricking me Hathor: I gotta take a trip back and cure myself Sekhmet: awh, you're homesick, precious Sekhmet: now it makes sense why you wanna tie me down Hathor: can barely understand him he's from so far north, more likely that Sekhmet: throwback 📟 📠 📺 📻 Hathor: get the psych dept to pull their shrink shit on me about it Sekhmet: You wanna be just like Vee, sorted Sekhmet: take my PhD now 💁 Hathor: be more disrespectful! first you stand me up and then put that out there Sekhmet: 🤭 you've got a ways to go, even if you're rolling mad extra today Hathor: I didn't ask 👼🏽💘 to 🎯 me up in the 🍑 Hathor: got my own things I'm busy with Sekhmet: love is magic 💖 Sekhmet: don't be complaining in my inbox when I'm tragically single Hathor: I've been serving and swerving him for long enough I thought I'd succeeded, there's the complaint Sekhmet: 🙄 you can't ❌ feelings bitch Hathor: white boys are a different animal, I ❌ the fear of Sekhmet: 😍😍😍 Hathor: I'm not here to be treated like a 👸🏽 if that's one step away from being called 'exotic' Hathor: there's nothing sexy about a power imbalance Sekhmet: most girls would disagree, babe Sekhmet: why do you wanna be run of the mill every day when we been #blessed with this 🔥 Sekhmet: all black guys wanna chat about is my light-skin privilege and their black man struggles, I can't 🥱 Hathor: fetishization like that ain't foreplay I'm interested in Hathor: 👑 me for other reasons than my melanin Sekhmet: insecurities SNAPPED, I'm sure he likes you for more than your skin, you crazy Hathor: he likes me for how I pour measures rn Sekhmet: racial Sekhmet: that's why everyone likes you 💃💃💃 Hathor: on account of being a poor student not Northern Irish, don't be biting the hand that feeds your blackouts Sekhmet: my white boys always pay Hathor: #blessed innit Sekhmet: 👸😇 tings Hathor: which white boy you with ignoring your deadline then? Sekhmet: whoever it is they've gone to work Sekhmet: but they left a 💳 with their cute note so I know I'm in a good postcode still 🙏 Hathor: so come meet me and spare mine, that's the right thing to do Sekhmet: just 'cos it's good doesn't mean I'm not lost still, damn Sekhmet: hold on and let me get dressed and get my bearings Hathor: if your phone ain't drained I can use it to get your bearings while you serve a look Sekhmet: who doesn't have a charger in their hoe 👜 PLEASE Hathor: you didn't know what day it was, can't blame me for 👶🏽ing Sekhmet: where would I be without you 😘 Sekhmet: mum hasn't phoned me in ages actually, it's so rude Sekhmet: I missed the last few but still Hathor: I hit her with your highlights, creatively Hathor: like how I won't mention a white boy making me feel like a baby 🐮 that can't walk Sekhmet: 😶😶 Sekhmet: dad would 😥 Hathor: and she'll 🙌🏽 harder than you've done Sekhmet: facts are facts Sekhmet: look at her dad, Vee's... Hathor: cliches are tired and stereotypes are damaging Sekhmet: @ your white boy with the 👋 then booboo Sekhmet: I think dad's in town working today, you wanna come for dinner with us? 🥂 Hathor: he's not mine to command in or out 👅 Hathor: yeah 🍾 will help Sekhmet: I'll teach you Hathor: those twin stereotypes are damaging too, like Sekhmet: oh hush, I only tried to 💋 you ONE time and we were like babies and that boy was the first great love of my life Sekhmet: anyway, you're like hot but not my types type these days, you know Hathor: that boy was trash Hathor: you levelled up fast though Sekhmet: awh, don't be rude, I have fond memories Hathor: I have loads of him trying to ask me out at the same time Sekhmet: oh yeah Sekhmet: I forgot that happened Sekhmet: his hair was gorgeous though Hathor: it was Sekhmet: good times Sekhmet: my new guy, not this one, the actual one, looks like old school Leo, I SWEAR Hathor: Yeah? Sekhmet: like Leo and a bit of River and Ryan Philippe in Cruel Intentions Sekhmet: 🥰🥰🥰 Hathor: love of your life material Sekhmet: definitely Sekhmet: he's a trader in the city and his apartment is 😱😱😱 Hathor: what's the age range this time? Sekhmet: he's only 26, it's mad how successful he is already Hathor: he sounds like the full 🎟 Hathor: any catch? Sekhmet: only technically Hathor: technically he's a 🤖? Sekhmet: ha, he totally has the stamina of one Sekhmet: he can keep up with me, almost 😉 Hathor: 👌🏽 he's perfect Hathor: fucking hell Sekhmet: no need to be jealous when you're 🥰 yourself Sekhmet: what does he look like? Hathor: Tall enough Hathor: more like a 🥊 than a 👼🏻 Sekhmet: you really do wanna do great grandpa Sekhmet: jk, he sounds so you Hathor: he does work for the main brewery that supplies us, maybe I do Hathor: Jesus Christ Sekhmet: 😂😬 processing that Sekhmet: not really though, every boy I've ever dated has been like dad, it's unavoidable tbh 💁 Hathor: in our postcode nobody's trying very hard to be anything else Hathor: 💰💳💎🍾 Sekhmet: why would they? Hathor: they wouldn't and they aren't, it'd be terrifying for any of those boys to step out Sekhmet: 🙄 you aren't going to throw yourself down a ladder when you're at the top, babe Hathor: wouldn't kill them to give other people a hand up though, they just act like it Sekhmet: 🥱 when's your deadline? Hathor: my work's done Sekhmet: then button it, loser Sekhmet: you wanna eat out on this nice rich boy's 💳 Hathor: ETA of 15 on getting to you Hathor: you best 🚿 Sekhmet: way ahead of you 🛀 Sekhmet: door's unlocked, our breakfast will hopefully be on the table when you get here Sekhmet: love ubereats Hathor: 🙌🏽 Sekhmet: you can bring it through, the view in this bathroom is immense Sekhmet: thought getting the driver to bring it to the tub was unlikely Hathor: he probably would but it's unlikely I'd recover from walking in on it Sekhmet: 😘 Sekhmet: do fuck with an asian boy Hathor: you don't know he will be Hathor: might not even be a lad Hathor: but if it is, guarantee they'll send the most unexpected one Sekhmet: it usually is, your stereotypes be damned Hathor: what are you gonna bet? Sekhmet: the Belgian 🧇s Hathor: you're on Sekhmet: sometimes you shock me with how green you are, Hath Hathor: back to putting disrespect on me, what a nice truce while it lasted, like Sekhmet: I mean, you know I can see the driver on my app, babe Sekhmet: no points for guessing where Hassan is from Sekhmet: you can have the 🧇s anyway Hathor: you know I can read your thoughts, the playing field is level Hathor: and anyway I like green, that's my boy's eye colour Sekhmet: been gazing into them longingly across the bar have we🤭 Hathor: maybe Sekhmet: so cute Sekhmet: hope this one doesn't have a fiancee Sekhmet: or a maid who thinks we've broken in Hathor: if he does he better break that eye contact with me Sekhmet: I meant Mr Black Card, don't worry Sekhmet: he's a student, yeah? he won't be Hathor: he's only got a year on us, I don't predict an engagement Sekhmet: yeah, doubt it Hathor: outside of our family people aren't usually that extra Sekhmet: some of the asian internationals are but they usually cheat if their intended ain't here yet so Hathor: Yeah Sekhmet: what even does an engagement mean anyway Sekhmet: not much, right Hathor: a flash 💍 Hathor: what's my course teaching me if I don't know the statistics on how often a wedding follows? Hathor: shows how outdated it is Sekhmet: he gives me that anyway Hathor: I'd take a phone number and be happy with it for now Hathor: but it's probably the party and that whole flex too, right? Sekhmet: the dress Sekhmet: but it's irrelevant if it doesn't happen, like you said Hathor: 🎁🎁 even if it doesn't if people bring them for the engagement as well, but you're not going short of any Sekhmet: right Sekhmet: 😥 if you need a wedding for attention Hathor: Jay's birth mum QUAKING Sekhmet: omg I bet that's EXACTLY what his fiancee is like Hathor: does he ever speak about her? Sekhmet: obviously not Sekhmet: but she must never come up from wherever they're from because I'm like ALWAYS over so Hathor: maybe she doesn't know about this place Hathor: old school Sekhmet: Who knows Sekhmet: can't be my problem Hathor: Yours is the day you've missed, like Hathor: what's the assignment? Sekhmet: design some sportswear line Sekhmet: got to get the sketches in by 5, but all I ordered for me was a shit ton of coffee, it'll be fine Hathor: more productive if I stay or go? Sekhmet: you've already missed your date, you may as well stay Hathor: okay Hathor: am the sportier one Sekhmet: how are you 😂 Hathor: ⚽⛹🏽🚴🏽🥊 Hathor: why dad loves me more than you Sekhmet: now I know you're talking nonsense 😏 Hathor: True, he loves Vee and she never gets off her chaise Sekhmet: and she doesn't even love him back Hathor: poor dad Sekhmet: yeah Hathor: what time's dinner with him? Sekhmet: I'll ask him when he wants to go Hathor: about to come up, so whatever you were planning for Hassan, this is me Sekhmet: regrettably noted

1 note · View note

descendantofthesparrow · 5 years

Text

Part of your world - Harry Hook x reader - Part 15 - talk

a rewrite of the harry hook x reader that @bluediamondsevie wrote for me

summary: a who doesn’t love the Disney World, well, (y/n) especially loves descendants, and one day, as she dances in her kitchen getting ready to head out. 17-year-old (y/n) becomes part of that world, now a certain blue-eyed pirate meets the girl from a world where he is a fictional character and he has an actor named Thomas Doherty.

Key:

h/c- hair color

e/c- eye color

h/l- hair length

s/c- skin color

y/n- your name

your stuff

---

You were glad to get that off your shoulders, the relief of knowing you no longer had to ignore Harry was exhilarating. Now you sat at one of the tables, waiting for Harry to return, Uma stalked around the shop, taking and dropping off orders.

You sighed and dug through your bag, withdrawing your sketchpad and pencil, opening to a blank page. You sat for a moment, not knowing what to draw before inspiration hit you, and you began to draw.

10 minutes later, a pretty goddamn good looking sketch of Harry was on your page, from his diamond cut jawline to his soft fluffy hair, it was Harry.

Specifically, it was Harry from a week ago, when you, Uma, Gil, and Harry were chilling on the deck of the revenge, and Harry had laughed at one of Gils jokes, and you had locked the memory of his face in your brain (as you have done many times) and now you had sketched it out. It was one of the few times you saw the true harry, not harry hook, son of captain. Without the eyeliner and hook, he was just a 17-year-old boy who was kind and loving to the people he cared about. But to others, he was a psychopathic, bloodthirsty, and uncaring.

But he wasn’t like that, not really.

He was the boy you loved, you would never leave his side, not if you could do anything about it.

--- Mal pov---

“okay! Okay, so what are we gonna do?” Jay asked, silencing Evie and Carlos, all three looked at me, and I rolled my eyes.

“we!” I spoke, stalking over to them and grabbing my bag “are not doing anything, this is between Uma and me, and shes a punk and guess what?! Now I have to go and get him!!”

Carlos quickly tried to stop me, holding his hands in front of him “woah woah woah, you’re still going to have to go through harry hook and his wharf rats”

“Yeah,” jay jumped in “besides, in the short time we've been here, I've heard Umas got a new crew member that took down Hook, you’re gonna need us”

I rolled my eyes, Hook wasn’t that hard to take down,…I hoped, he was one of the few Villains that scared me.

“Uma said to come alone”

“Mal come on.” Evie pleaded, I just made a face and shrugged, Carlos sighed and made his final statement

“Uma said to come alone. I know one thing, I’m not going anywhere” Carlos flopped onto the couch, looking up at the three of us. Jay sighed and said; “we’ll be here when you get back.”

I just nodded and started to walk out.

I arrived at the chip shop and slammed open the doors, seeing shrimpy tossing orders to her patrons, not caring if they were correct or not.

I smirked when she looked up and locked eyes with her, I sang out; “im back~” shrimpy scoffed, and gestures to an empty table

“loser party of one, right this way, please” as I walk forward Shrimpy shoves a chair at me, I fumbled to catch it and she laughed cruelly.

I sit and look around, it still stunk like old fish and shit.

“place still stinks”

Shrimpy made a face of innocence “oh im sorry, we were down a butler today…princess” I glared, hating the name.

“where is he?” shrimpy only laughed and tossed her apron onto the floor, grinning at me.

“you know I've dreamed of this? You wanting something from me, and me watching you squirm like a worm on a hook~”

“im so flattered that you dream of me, I haven’t given you thought since I left”

Shrimpy growled and slammed her hands on the table, but I wasn’t paying attention anymore, my sights had locked onto a girl.

A girl with (h/c) (short/long) hair, and (s/c) skin, she turned slightly to look at shrimpy, and I recognized her as the girl I saw on the rooftops earlier today.

‘Oh, so shes apart of shrimpy’s crew’ Mal thought, turning back to shrimpy, hiking her hand on the table, prepared to not lose ben to the sea bitch ‘that makes it easier’

---

Fuck! Shrimpy wanted the wand in exchange for Ben, shit.

“there's no way we can give Uma the wand, we can't just let her destroy Auradon!!” Evie forced out, panicking over the situation.

“if we don’t give her the wand bens toast” Carlos ground out, Evie just waved her hands around still panicking “great! So we're just gonna give Uma of all people the wand!” a thought came to my head, Carlos’ printer!!

“wait, you guys!! Your 3D printer!”

Carlos’ eyes brightened and he smiled “ a phony wand” “yeah!” “im my sleep!” Evie stopped us with logic “but the second Uma tests it, she’ll know it’s a fake”

“then we’ll just get Ben out really fast we’ll need some kind of diversion” the four of us Sat for a second before Jay jumped in “smoke bombs” I grinned and pointed at him, Evie jumps at the idea “that’s perfect! I’ll get the chemicals we need at lady Tremaine’s place, that could work!”

Evie walked over to me and complimented my hair, I gushed that Dizzy did it and Evie squealed, but the boys brought us back down to earth.

“Oh, one more thing!!” Evie, Carlos, and Jay stopped, looking at me in confusion.

“remember the girl the FG wanted us to find?” they all nodded, clearly remembering the picture of the (h/c), (e/c) girl.

“shes apart of Uma’s crew, when the smoke bombs go off, who ever’s closest to her, grabs her.”

They nodded.

“we’re sending her back home, no matter the cost”

--- back to you---

You were finishing another sketch of Harry, though this time Uma and Gil were apart of the sketch. It was a sketch from a week ago, just like your last sketch, but this was when you were sitting across from the trio and the sight of them being normal teenagers instead of vk striving to escape their hell hole had burned into your memory.

As you finished the details of Harry's hair, you felt a presence behind you. Glancing behind, it was one of Gils brothers…the one you first encountered on your arrival to the isle.

He smirked cruelly and tore the sketchbook away from you, you growled and tried to grab it but he held it above you, laughing.

“come on girly~ don’t you want your book back?!” you snarled, jumping trying to snatch it, when the oaf grabbed your waist and pressed you against his chest, making him smirk at the squish of your chest.

“let me go you fuckin cunt”

“oh such a dirty mouth, don’t worry, I know how to clean it~” you paled at his remark, as he glanced down at his crotch, and then at your mouth. Disgusting.

“tell ya what, if you do a little something for me, I’ll give you back your book, if you know what I mean”

You quickly tried to wriggle away, but his grip held tight, and he cackled but stopped when a hook was pressed against his neck.

You sighed in relief, Harry was here.

“I suggest ye put the lass down ye Gypit Hoor” Gaston jr gulped and released you, but he still had your sketchbook and Harry noticed, he gripped the wrist holding the book and twisted it, Gaston gasped and released the book, it fell to the floor. You rushed to grab it and shuffled behind Harry.

Harry growled in Gaston jr’s ear and whispered something. He paled and nodded, Harry huffed and released him, Gaston took the opportunity and bolted.

You sighed and flipped open the book, checking for damage. Luckily only a corner of the cover was scuffed.

Looking up you saw Harry gently gazing at you, you could see the question in his soft ocean blue eyes.

‘are you okay?’

You smiled and nodded. He smiled back and tilted his head, raising his eyebrow.

“Now lass, ye said ye wanted to talk?” you nodded, but reached out and tugged at his jacket nodding towards the door.

“yes, but in private, its important that this is only for your ears”

Harry's eyes widened and he nodded, following you out the door and to the ship, as you walked side by side, you didn’t notice Harry glance at your free hand, he bit his lip, wondering how you would react.

Fuck it.

Shyly reaching out, he brushed his fingers with yours, you jumped slightly, and with that he retracted, his face pink.

You glanced at his face, seeing his embarrassment, he-he wanted to hold your hand?

…fuck why is he so cute!...

Knowing he lost his nerve to do it again, you reached out and curled your pinkie around his.

Harry turned red, only thinking ‘holy shit holy shit holy shit, im holding (y/n)s hand holy shit’

Soon you arrived at the ship, but even when you entered your room, Harry didn’t release your hand. Continuing to lock his fingers with yours.

“sooo” Harry mumbled, curious on what you wanted to tell him “what did ye want to tell meh?”

You froze, oh right…tell him who you really were.

You sighed, releasing his hand and taking a deep breath.

You looked up at Harry, who was staring at you in confusion and concern.

“what I am about to tell you is not to leave this room, understood, this is a secret between you and me.” Harry nodded, and his eyes turned serious.

You internally smiled, glad to have his support back. Now, to tell him. Just let it out in one go.

“I’m not from the Isle” Harry made a face, what?

“im, not an Auradon runaway either” Harry swallowed harshly. What was going on? Did-did you lie to him the entire time he knew you?!

“im from a different dimension where you are a character from a movie called Descendants 2”

Harry only stared at you, you lied to him? Pain started to seep from his chest “wha’- wha’ about yer ma? The one ye told meh ye escaped from?”

“im sorry but I lied to you about that, I didn’t know how you react to suddenly meeting a girl from a different dimension?! Tell me to harry what would you have done if I immediately told you who I really was?”

Harry's pain decreased, dear god what would he have done? Meeting a girl who knew the ins and outs of this world?

“i-I would have takin’ ye hostage and forced the information out’ve ye”

You nodded hurt by knowing that Harry would have hurt you just to get information about his world, to rule over it.

“s-s, but how do I know ye are telling the truth, for I know ye are just pulling me leg?” you were prepared for this, fishing your phone from your pocket, you unlocked it and opened the page from earlier. “Thomas Doherty”

You handed the phone to harry and his eyes widened at the identical boy on the screen, he saw beneath the picture was a description.

“Harry Hook played by Thomas Doherty”

He quickly pressed the images tab, seeing multiple pictures of the actor who looked exactly like him, before stopping at a picture, one of Him Uma and Gil, all standing on the stage, Uma and Gil grinning at each other, he himself was glaring at Gil.

“wh-where are ye?” you sighed, shoulders slumping, “im not there because im not supposed to be, im technically supposed to standing in front of you right now actually”

Harry nodded slowly, glancing back down at your phone. He sighed walking forward and bumping his forehead on yours, making you slump in relief and you fell into his side.

“I understand lass, but” you drew back slightly looking up at his face, confusion, and pain set on it.

“why did ye ignore me?”

Releasing a shaky breath you slowly revealed what happened, though some reasoning was changed.

“I told Uma bout me being from another world, and” “wait Uma knows?” “yes, I told her yesterday.” “alright continue”

“anyway, and I realized something, you and I had become really close, and I thought that if I left this world, you would be hurt by it, and so to spare you the pain of that, I started to ignore you. But Uma kinda cornered me and told me something that changed my mind, and now…here we are.”

Harry nodded, before seeming to think something over.

“(y/n)?” you hummed, looking into his eyes “what do ye mean ‘if ye leave this world’ ?” you sighed and hugged yourself, “there's a chance that Im forced back into my world”

Harry growled, like hell that would happen, he just got you back!!

“but” Harry stopped, what? “I won't leave your side, not if there's anything I can do about it.”

Harry nodded and seemed to ponder over something for a minute. Before holding out a fist, his pinkie finger extended. And he spoke in a slightly broken voice

“ye promise?” you didn’t hesitate, threading your pikie with his, smiling at him, determination in your eyes

“I promise”

As you both stood there, you saw Harry's eyes flash towards your lips, your eyes widened slightly, what?

Harry began to lean in slightly, you ignored the condescending voice in your head, leaning in as well, but before anything really happened, the door slammed open, and there stood Uma, a proud grin on her face.

“come on you two, we gotta go over the specifics of the plan for tomorrow with the crew”

She turned and made her way back to the deck. You and Harry stood there for a moment, faces red, before Harry broke away from you, walking to the door, you stared sadly at his back, thinking you had gone back after the awkward moment just then, before he stopped and looked back at you, extending his hand, and smiling softly.

“Shall I escort ye me lady~” you giggled and grasped his hand letting him lead.

“you shall~”

Dear god, you hope you never had to leave this handsome pirates side~

---end of part 15---

Comment or message me for part 16

taglist:

@namelesslosers

@crazybutconfidentaf

@lukes-princess

@starrykitn

@marvel-ousnesss

#part of your world #harry hook x reader #harry hook #harry hook descendants #harry hook imagine #harry hook fanart #my art #disney descendants #Descendents #descendants

187 notes · View notes

ninliane · 4 years

Text

Haikyuu Secret Santa 2019 Gift Exchange!

tadaaa here’s my part for the gift exchange! this is for you alicia ( @bokunotan ) ! you said that you liked dadchi so i give him to u uwu. you know tbh daichi is the one character im not confident in writing in so i had to read a few fanfics to help me sort out his character! (it was mostly @imaginethathaikyuu haha thank you.) please tell me if you want it rewritten alicia! this is my first time writing for daichi but i think i did okay for a first shot haha. also thank you to @supern-a-vengers for hosting this event! anyway i used your name in the fanfic (honestly i love your name so much) so i really hope you enjoy your present :))

also if the title sounds weird its really supposed to sound like that, it’s a title of an old christmas song haha.

merry christmas!

-audrey

-----

the day before the night before christmas (daichi x alicia)

It was the cold winter morning on the 23rd of December; you hadn’t done much except for making breakfast. You thought to get into the Christmas mood you could play some music while you cooked breakfast. It was..nice.

Calm music was playing as you enjoyed cooking, eating your piping hot food to warm you up, and curling on the couch nearby the window as you sketched random thoughts that would pass by your mind: the passing snowflakes, the white and leafless trees, the running water that had yet to be frozen.

....?

‘What on earth..?’ you thought to yourself.

You looked at your notebook in confusion as you cautiously lifted your pencil. It was a face, but its features weren’t quite there yet. Who were you drawing?

That question ran through your mind for the rest of the morning until a vibration from your pocket shook you out of your thoughts.

‘The rest of the third years are going to go to the shrine since it’s almost Christmas, do you want to go?’

Oh? This was strange. Daichi rarely texted you. You read the text over and over again until you came to the conclusion: why not? You quickly put on your winter outfit but as soon as you finished you looked at yourself in the mirror and immediately started over. This went on for a good twenty minutes. Why can’t you decide what to wear? Usually, this would be easy for you..wait why are you even self-conscious? There’s no special reason to look nice is there??

You decided on going with a long unbuttoned beige overcoat. a long-sleeved striped shirt, and cute checkered shirt, long boots, a white scarf and a cute beret to top it off. Twirling around in the mirror you smiled to yourself, “Yeah this looks good.”

—

It seems all that time you spent in front of the mirror cost you. You ran through the crowded shrine, trying to look for your company. “Oh no..I’m not too late are I?” you looked frantically looked around.

“Oh! Daichi Daichi there she is!”

“Where? Oh, I see her!”

“Go go go!”

“Agh- guys stop pushing me! And keep your voice do-“

“Alicia-san!”

You whipped your head as you heard your name called. It belonged to your fellow classmate Sugawara Koshi, linked in his arm was a certain volleyball captain, struggling to stand up. Behind him were two faces you knew well: Kiyoko and Asahi. You smiled at the familiar faces and walked up to them, your coat and scarf gliding in the wind as you walked.

“Hi! Merry Christmas!” you greeting smiling. “Merry Christmas, Alicia-chan.” Kiyoko greeted, as did Sugawara and Asahi. The captain, who had just been standing there frozen, didn’t say anything. His eyes widened at your appearance, simply just, well, staring. You noticed this and your cheeks heated up a bit. “Merry Christmas, Daichi-san.” you said offering a smile. Daichi on the other hand, who was still frozen in awe, had to be hit by Sugawara. ‘Oi, respond you dumbass.’ the vice-captain whispered. “Oh! U-uh Merry Christmas, Alicia-san!” he stuttered which made you laugh. A laugh he oh-so adored.

“This guy is hopeless..” his friend thought. Throughout the day the five of you walked throughout the shrine, getting fortunes and making whishes. As the four of you clapped your hands and closed your eyes, Daichi peeked one eye open, glancing at your as your eyes were tight shut, concentrating on your wish. He smiled and closed his eyes again, deciding to wish for one more thing.

Sunset arrived and the five of you walked down the steps. Kiyoko and Asahi are pulled to the side by Sugawara and you cocked an eyebrow, but soon distracted by it as Daichi approached you. “So, you got any winter plans?” he smiled. You laughed and shrugged, looking at the city glow that began to emit through the dark sky, “Not much, might just stay home and chill.” “Oh, is that so.” you stayed in silence for awhile before he continued. “Hey..if you’re not doing anythi-“

“Daichi, Alicia!” the two of you whipped your heads to Sugawara, who was walking away as he dragged Kiyoko and Asahi with him. “Asahi and Shimizu are gonna head to the restaurant nearby so I’ll join them, see you guys!”

‘Ah..so it’s just the two of us now..’ Daichi looked back to Alicia, “Alicia-san, would you like me to walk you home?” she giggled in response, “That would be nice thank you.”

The sun had now set, and the walk was comfortably quiet until Alicia spoke up, “You know I’m really glad you texted me today, I originally was just gonna stay at home but I really had fun with everyone, especially you!” she teased. Through the cold, Daichi felt his cheeks warm up, “Oh, haha really? I’m glad you accepted!” he’s gonna keep hidden from the fact that it was Suga who stole his phone and texted the message to you as he was too nervous to do it. He chose his words carefully as he mumbled,

“S-so um..”

“Would you like to do this again?” they both spoke at the same time.

The snow fell on their hair as they looked into each other's eyes. “Oh, uhm I mean just the two of us,” Alicia quickly spoke, “..if that’s okay with you?” she made eye contact again. Daichi thought these kinds of stuff only happened in dreams or on TV, he really couldn’t believe what was happening. “Yes, of course! I’d love to!” he earnestly told her. Alicia gave back a warm smile. Daichi leaned into her face,

“Then I’ll pick you up for New Years'.” she felt his hot breath whisper into her ear. Alicia didn’t know what came over her to have asked such a request, but she knew she didn’t regret it. She finally finished the faceless drawing that was in her notebook. She stared at it for a bit before laughing.

“I should probably have him in front of me next time.”

#hqss2019 #haikyuu #haikyuu!!#daichi sawamura #daichi x alicia #gift exchange

14 notes · View notes

chonisbestmistake · 5 years

Text

Little family

Jennie x Lisa

Warnings: fluff

Word count: 931

Summary: Lisa lets her child out of sight at Rosie`s birthday party. Jennie`s POV.

NOTE: Its a sketch i made on my way home. Short but sweet)

"Sophie?"

I find myself in the room with god knows how many people, trying to find my daughter. Rose's birthday party looks like hell. There's too many people and its starting hard to breathe, but it seems like everyone`s still enjoying themselves. I open the door to the other room full of people, and there she is, sitting on Jisoo's lap, my gummy smile Lisa always tells me about shines on her cute baby face. They're in a deep conversation and it's adorable how they found themselves in their own little bubble with so many people present in a room.

"Mommy, i found Jisoo unnie, can you believe it?" She looks up at me when I come closer and then turns to my friend who's grinning like she's just won a billion dollars.

"Yes, babe, but i'm glad i finally found you. How many times do i have to tell you not to run away from me or mama?" I give her a stern look and she immediately pouts.

"Im sorry, but mama was so busy talking to someone and I got booored. But i was so excited and i just saw unnie here and i came to talk to her. She's so cool, im gonna marry her!" She squeaks and claps her hands, giving Jisoo a toothy smile.

"Im gonna kill Lisa...Wait, what?" I let out a huff, smirking at grinning Jisoo.

"Yea, right Unnie? Will you be my wife?" Sophia smiles and leans onto Jisoo's shoulder lovingly.

"I would love to." Jisoo says to my 3 year old girl and looks at me with a smirk. "Chill, Jendeukie, we're just planning our wedding, its no biggie." She chuckles.

"Yeah, chill mommy, its no biggie." She repeats after Chu and grins happily, making Jisoo laugh hysterically.

"Sophia! That is not the way to talk to your mother." I see Lisa now standing by my side glaring at our child playfully. She gives me a side hug and looks at our daughter expectantly.

"Im sorry, mama…" Sophia says with small voice, looking down in shame, her cheeks painted bright pink. "I won`t say it again."

"Thanks Lili, but you were supposed to be watching her." I glare at my wife trying to look as mad as possible.

"Sorry babe, i got lost in the conversation. Won`t happen again, promise!" She leans down and kisses me sweetly.

"Anyways." I pause, chuckling. "Sophie, you wanted to see someone tonight, didn't you?" I smirk as my child's eyes immediately lit up, sad look completely disappearing from her face.

"Rosie! Where is she?" Sophia jumps from Jisoo's lap and starts to look around in a hurry.

"Say goodbye to Jisoo unnie first, young lady. Then we can go and find your precious Rosé." Lisa laughs as i send Jisoo an apologetic smile. She just shrugs it off, chuckling at our child`s enthusiasm.

"Bye-bye, Jisoo unnie! See ya around?"

"Sure, little princess. Go ahead, say happy birthday to Rosie." Jisoo gives her one last hug and smiles when my baby kisses her cheek affectionately.

We exchange our goodbyes and go out of the room, Sophia jumping in Lisa's arms excitedly.

"Where is she? Where is she?"

"Stop bouncing or im gonna drop you right now, bug." Lisa says and Sophia immediately stills in her arms, fear become visible on her face, and i can’t help but giggle. "Yeah, just like that."

"Limario, stop scaring my little flower! We all know you won't do that." I hear Rosé's voice behind me.

"Rosie, happy birthday!" Sophia screams, literally jumping from Lisa's arms and hugs Rosé.

"I wouldn't be so sure. I remember this one time ..." I began, laughing, as Lisa turns around and silence me with her mouth. I can’t help but melt in her arms immediately.

"Hey, sweetie, i think we should give your mamas some time alone while we catch up together, what do you think? I have someone waiting to meet you too." Rosie whispers to our daughter loud enough for us to hear while Lisa hugs me from behind, laying her head on my shoulder.

"Sure!" Sophia whispers back and puts her tiny hands around my friend's neck.

"Thanks." We both say in the same time as Rosé goes back to another room, carrying our baby and smiling at us teasingly.

"Looks like we have an hour or so to ourselves, wanna go skinny deep?" Lisa whispers in my ear seductively, making me laugh happily.

"There is no pool around, babe, and you know we can't just leave without being noticed." I smile and kiss her tenderly on the lips. "But I think I’ve got an idea."

"I'm all ears, honey, im all ears."

***

"Mama, did I tell you about my new friend? Her name's Ariana, can you believe it? She's cute and funny. Did I tell you?" Sophia giggled, bouncing in her car seat in the back. It is almost ten o'clock and our little family's heading to our apartment.

"Yeah, nugget, at least three times already." Lisa smiles at our daughter and turns back to me. "I think Jisoo now has a competitor."

"Yeah, she would have to fight for our princess' heart, right babe?" I say as I park the car in front of our mansion. "Babe?"

I turn around and see our girl already asleep in her car seat, snoring peacefully.

"Aww, she's such a cutie! I love you so much, Nini, and i'm so grateful you gave birth to this beautiful human being." Lisa says with bright smile and leans in to give me a tender kiss.

#jenlisa #blackpink #blackpink scenarios #jennie x lisa

53 notes · View notes

btsneeds · 7 years

Text

embedded pt1

alright im making a story and I really hope you guys like it! I know we all dont have the same biases so i made the guys name “Rome” instead of jimin or bambam or whatever. You can substitute the name for you bias if you want.This is my first story so please tell me how im doing! thank you and enjoy!!! and please dont steal my story!

victoria's pov

"Alright bye, dad! I'll see you later!" I yelled out by the door getting ready to meet my friend Elizabeth at a tattoo parlor. I turned eighteen a week ago and I really wanted to get one then but I was too busy packing my stuff to get one.

Hey girly are you close yet? my uber just dropped me off, theres a rlly hot guy here. help.

I read Liz's text as I was getting ready to buckle my seat in my white G-Wagon I got as a present last year for Christmas.

"Hey, Siri text Liz, I'm on my way and how hot?" I say to my phone or Siri in specific. The parlor is just down the road from where I live, very convenient if I want more tattoos in the future. The shop is a part of a building probably a block wide and is shared with a small cafe. The word cafe makes it sounds so fancy, like something in France but it looks more of like a hang out spot.As soon as I got out of my car I was engulfed in a hug by Liz.

"Girl, I went in there and a boy with tattoos all along his arm is he hella fine. Not only is he tasty looking but he is 18." Liz said gushing over this guy.

"Okay, chill. I'll be the judge of how hot I think he is. But anyway I was thinking of getting a flower on the side of my boob. What are you getting?" I asked her while locking my car and into the parlor with Liz at my side.

"I'm thinking of getting 'You Can' in a very minimalist font on my wrist." She replied.

" Hey, do you guys have an appointment or...?" This really cute guy at the counter asked us. He has a very hot/cute fuckboy hair cut but he has one some round glasses. I also noticed that he doesn't have tattoos along his arm but just an inked out band with flowers growing along it.

"Uhh yeah, we have an appointment for two under Victoria and Liz?" Liz stated while asking the boy.

"Alright sweet, just have a seat and they'll come out soon." The boy said referring to the artists. Liz and I looked around the pretty packed shop and sat down on a bench waiting.

"That's not the hot guy I saw earlier, but I hope he's still here and I really want him to ink one of us." Liz said clapping quietly like a little girl. We waited for not that long until a girl and a guy came out from the back to greet us. The girl looked very badass and had some high-rise jeans that were uneven at the bottom that ended just above her ankles, she was wearing a flared long sleeved striped turtle neck under a black silk tank top that could pass as a lingerie top. She paired her outfit with a cute mustered yellow floppy styled hat but it was a suede material.

The guy, on the other hand, looked exactly like how Liz described him. The vibe you get from just looking at him from afar makes you want to know more. He looks like the type of guy your parents don't want you hanging around, yet he does look hella fine.

"Liz?" The guy came up to me asked with a smile.

"Victoria." I smiled back.

"Haha sorry, I'm Rome. Do you want to tell me what you want for a tattoo?" He asked mentioning to follow him. We landed in his office which I'm guessing. Everything is coated with white and back, from the carpet to the floors. There was a cork board hanging above his desk with sketches of different tattoos or artworks that I guess he did.

"I really want like two or three flowers in a bunch just on the side right here," I said rubbing the left side of my side boob. It was more like on the side ribs though. I don't have a huge chest so I thought it wouldn't be as awkward to talk about the placement but he is being very chill about it and it's making my very comfortable and I feel like I'm in safe hands.

"Sweet that sounds cool do you have any preferences on what flowers you want.?" Rome asked. I thought about it while he was drawing what I wanted into a sketch book. It seemed like forever on me just thinking about the flowers so I bravely said. " You choose." Showing a smile.

"Sick alright. " He smiled widely and started to sketch more. "How does this look?" He showed me his drawing of what I wanted and it's perfect. Smiling I said, "It's perfect." He then took me into another room full of tattoo chairs and ink stations. There looked like four other people were getting tattoos I guessed growing off of hearing the buzzing noises of multiple ink stations.

"Alrighty babe, just sit tight right here while I get everything set up." The way Rome said babe can just melt my heart into a puddle. The more I sat there the more nervous I was to get the tattoo. What if I regret it? What if my boobs start sagging and the tattoo starts sagging too? The more I thought, the more I start shaking. Rome soon comes over with a black tray full of stuff and notices that I'm shaking. He kneels down to my eye level and grabs both my hands around his inked out one.

"Don't worry about it okay? It may hurt just a little bit, but it would be totally worth it in the end. Do you think I would get this many on my body if it would hurt a lot?" He told me making me feel a lot better.

As soon as he sees that I'm calmed down he asks me to lay down on my side so my left side could be tattoo-able, and lift up my shirt just above where I wanted it to be hiding my tits. Is it weird that I like having him stare at my boobs even if it's just the side?

"Alright, since this is on the ribs, it is gonna hurt a little bit and if it does you can just tell me and you can have a break if you want. " He said putting his hand on mine. Me nodding in reply, mentally preparing myself for this. As I'm just laying there watching him put on some black rubber gloves, I notice his rolled up gray sweat-shirt casually over his arm tattoos. There was a rose just laying right on his arm, a dagger that was pierced in his skin, and my favorite so far is The Great Wave of Kanawaga just above his rose. These are only a few out of all the many very detailed tattoos on his arm. He then went on to put the stencil on and rubbed it there with a small damp towel. After a couple of minutes waiting for it to dry, Rome turned on the machine letting it roar with a loud buzzing noise.

"Alright, I'm gonna start tattooing okay?" Rome asked and I replied with a nod. As the needle comes in contact with my skin, I try to keep calm while trying to memorize Rome, as if I'm not gonna be able to see him again. Black hair, only about a couple inches and end just right under his eyes, plump pink lips like a chubby little Asian baby and a jawline that the gods would worship. It's not disturbingly sharp but very definable.

Over forty-five minutes have passed and the tattoo is already done.

"Damn this fucking looks nice. " Rome says wiping away the ink. "Do you wanna take a look?"

"I'm so nervous right now. I don't know."

Rome laughed and said, "Let me wrap this up for you and let's see from then. Rome looked in one of the drawers and took out a clear like tape, saran wrap thing and stuck right on top of my new tattoo. He then held my arm lightly pulling me off the bed and placed his hand on my lower back and lead me to a giant wall mirror and positioned me to where I could see the flowers. I turned my head and looked at it.

"Oh wow. This is beautiful." I said is gasp. "This is more than I wanted. Thank you." I said hugging him.

"No problem, I'm just glad you like it. " Rome said. "Alright, I think your friend is done. Do you wanna go out?" Me nodding in response.

"Tori! Look at mine. I'm so excited,,," Liz said and continued to talk about a party this weekend or something. And me drifting off listening to Rome talk with the boy at the counter earlier. "That was my last one for today, soI'm gonna head out." He said putting on his coat and walking out. "Right let's go get something to eat. " Liz said dragging me out of the parlor and to my car. getting out my car keys I see Rome get on his bike and putting on his helmet. While putting on his helmet he catches me looking and smirks and get on his bike starting it and riding away.

#kpop #kpopsmut #btssmut #smut #got7 #bigbang #seventeen #monsta x #jimin #jiminsmut #jungkooksmut #got7smut #fluff #senerio #series

7 notes · View notes

trulymadlysydney · 7 years

Note

okay i'm the Boy Experience anon so here it goes (warning: it's long) okay so i'm a waitress at a bar and grill in the midwest and so these two guys came in one night and sat at the bar and i noticed one of them was hot af and the other had a wedding ring on, and they started casually talking to me bc i had to be at the bar alot to get drinks for my tables and also bc the bartender and i are good friends and so we just started talking casually and that was it (part ii coming next)

(part ii boy experience) and so then the next few nights they kept coming in (they were staying at the hotel across the street so this bar was convenient for them) and they would talk to me more and more and then they found out that it was gonna be my bday on friday (this was on wed) and they said that we all HAVE to do something for my bday and i was soooo into the one guy so i was like shit yeah lets do something and then of course Hottie McHot was all smooth like 'okay lemme get your number'(part iii) so THEN i gave him my number and texted me later after he left and i was still at work and then he was like saying i should come over afterwards to hangout for a bit (i was a bit sketched cuz like this could be dangerous ya feel) but whatevs i did it anyways and he said his room was a disaster so he and i and his friend hung out in the parking lot just talking while the two guys smoked and he was so flirty and SO HOT lemme tell you ill give you a better description in the next one(part iv) okay so this guy's family is from Morocco and so he is dark skinned (about the same tone as zayn) and he has lots of tats like one arm is a sleeve and he is SO muscular holy shit and his eyebrows are fleek af and he has jet black hair with a quiff and PERFECTLY STRAIGHT WHITE AS HELL teeth (tbh it sounds like i just described zayn) im not even kidding you this guy was like my dream man (the real good part's coming up i promise)(part v) so then friday comes around and its my bday and we've been texting a little bit the last few days and he and his friend eat at the bar again and they wait for me to get off work and then i change into an extra af outfit bc its my bday and so i KNOW im looking good and i see hottie stare at me a lil longer than normal. so then we all leave together and get into their rental car (they are here for work from California) and then we go get alcohol (i turned 19 so i couldnt get into bars)(part vii) and so then we hang in the friends room a while but then eventually me and hottie head up to his room and we are cuddling watching a movie and shit and then he starts making out with me (im in heaven already you have no idea) and feeling me up a bit and we were fooling around ya know and he takes off my romper leaving me in a cute crop and some undies and hes in his boxers and then he starts leading it to more and i just aint ready for that so i stopped him(part viii) and then i asked him if he was mad that i stopped us and he was like "you are way too fucking cute for me to be mad at" (the butterflies in my stomach were having a hay day) and so then we just kept making out and feeling each other up and it was hot af truly and the rest of then night we laid around in our underwear drinking wine and smoking out the window of the hotel and we stayed up till 4 am because we both were having SUCH a blast, laughing our heads off and flirting(part viiii) and tbh the whole night felt like a dream or a halsey music video it was very attractive and not gonna lie i felt very sexy chilling in my crop top and undies sitting on the windowsill with a bottle of wine in my hand and he had his hands on me while smoking a cigarette looking like a mf model and we stayed up all night together cuz we didnt want to lose any time together and so then in the morning he told me he felt like he's known me wayyy longer than barely a week(last part) and that he had the time of his life with me the night before and that he'll always remember it and that he can't wait to see me again so in two weeks he's coming back here for business and he said hes so excited to see me again then!!! so we get to have another night together and im soooo happy! he's so sweet and funny and attractive and i had an AMAZING time that night and he's been texting me the CUTEST shit the last few days basically im happy af and i knew you'd appreciate it!!------This!!! Truly sounds like you are living in fanfic and I COULDNT BE MORE JEALOUS OF YOU OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS BABE

9 notes · View notes

viralhottopics · 7 years

Text

‘Are You The One?’ Recap: So Bad For Them But I’m Doing Fine

Well, its Wednesday night and Im a bottle of wine in. Its time to love myself like that Hailee girl told me to and turn on some . Because nothing is better for your self-confidence then to watch other people fail. Miserably.

Last year Sams mom got in touch with me and this year its Giannas brother. Who will be next to defend their loved ones on the recaps? Carolinas great aunt? Stay tuned!

BACK AT THE HOUSE

Shocker, they all start binge drinking. Cant wait to see how much weight they all gain by the end of the season.

Little Mike is talking to Casandra about all the things he likes to do. These hobbies include taking long walks on the beach, gelling his hair and taking a daily measurement of his penis. His growth spurt is coming, okay?!

Casandra literally looks like a bobblehead and is like OKAY, OKAY, OKAY.

Little Mike: I LOVE LAMP

Mike wants to get to know Cas but also low-key hates her for having a family and being #blessed. He legit calls her a daddys girl to her face and shes not even phased. He starts talking about how his mom is broke and his dad is crazy and Im like, woah, did I change the channel accidentally to ? This shit is way too heavy for me rn.

If I could describe the house in three words that they all could understand it would be: Drunk. Horny. Stupid. In that order. Because they arent planning on getting a real job any time after this, they decide to throw an underwear party.

Ozzy is like Kathryn is very sexy, idk what it is about her that I like. He says as she grinds on him in her underwear. Hmmm, I wonder what it could be that makes you like her?

They start making out and he tells her that tomorrow is his birthday. So obviously she has to have sex with him because of THE IMPLICATION. (Name that reference and I will marry you.)

Tyler and Taylor are both like hey this underwear party is fucking gross and Im like FUCK YA TEAM NORMAL PEOPLE.

Tyler is like everyone is acting trashy and Im trying to better myself. Woah, ok. Profound. Tyler def got lost on the way to auditions and ended up on . Either that or hes a fucking narc.

Apparently nothing makes Tylers dick harder than belittling the people you live with and he starts making out with Taylor. Overall, v hot couple.

Then the camera pans out to literally everyone just hooking up. , brought to you by Trojan Condoms.

THE GAME

The game starts with everyone being blindfolded and the boys tied up, which is coincidentally also the first scene of .

The girls have to smell the guys and untie the one they want to take on a date. Because thats normal. The first three couples to finish go on a date.

The girls start sniffing and falling more than cokeheads at an EDM concert.

Kari has some big-ass eyes so every time she talks she looks fucking crazy. Actually, she kind of looks like me when Im high but Im pretending that Im not high so Im overly opening my eyes. Idk, just trying to create a visual.

Karis like “I STUDIED NEUROSCIENCE ONCE IN COLLEGE, PHEROMONES ARE REAL Yeah, no one said they werent#Science.

KARI: This one time, in my neuroscience class

Kari picks Joey the trashman, who I thought smells like shit but I guess not.

Hannah picks Tyler and is like wow, this blindfold makes it so hard to see. I totally respect blind people. Wow, Im sure blind people everywhere feel so fucking complimented. Like look mom, that girl on TV understands my daily struggle for 3 minutes!

They can still hear you being a dumbass, you know.

Alicia smells Andre because he, and I quote, smells like Fritios. This is like the cheapest advertisement Fritos has ever had. Also, Andre its time to get some new cologne.

Andre/Alicia, Joey/Kari and Hannah/Tyler all win and they are going to go windsurfing. Thrilling.

BACK AT THE HOUSE

Gianna apologizes to Hayden for being a low-key bitch last week and hes already well settled into his home on friendzone island.

Michael walks by and Gianna is like hanging on Hayden. Michael is very over it and Gianna is like . Fuck, okay.

Kam and Eddie are flirting and being cute and idk I like them so they better not fuck this up for me.

MY MOM: I like the girl with the grey-ish, purple-ish hair ME: Literally their names are at the bottom of the screen.

Carolina is very upset that Joey the trashman is going on a date with KARI (her name will be in all caps now because her eyes just make me feel some type of way). Carolina starts crying and shes like if youre not my match what is my purpose?! In the distance you can hear me screaming ITS WEEK TWO YOU DUMB BITCH.

THE DATE

Andre is the only one who can windsurf and Hannahs like”oh Daddy.” In the words of our President-Elect, everyone else is a bunch of losers. Huge losers! Failing at wind surfing! All talk, no action!

KARI is being really nice to Joey and saying hes fun and shes excited to be there and hes like ACTUALLY Im into Carolina. Woah. Okay, I know KARI may kind of look like Crazy Eyes but she seems nice and shes actually being genuine. So in my drunken state rn I am very mad for her.

Joey has officially moved to my shit list. And I dont even mean that because hes a trashman. Where he quite literally has to pick up shit. Get it? Ill see myself out.

Andre and Alisha seem to be getting along but IDK, they kinda act like little children. They talk a big game about how they are really into each other but I just cant see it. And Im pretty much a fucking expert at this show.

And none for Tyler and Hannah, bye!

THE TRUTH BOOTH

Andre and Alicia to the booth because the house isnt fully brain-dead. Everyone Is like “THEY ARE SO STRONG! THEYRE IN LOVE AFTER A WEEK.”

See, you say strong, I say fucking crazy.

And guess what, Im right motherfuckersNO MATCH.

Alicia starts crying and saying she doesnt want to be here. Damn, okay then fly tf outta here, what?

Hannah is like “HEY I KNOW YOUR HEART JUST BROKE, BUT IM GONNA GO AFTER ANDRE.” Its all about the subtle game. Hannah, could you like, chill your hoe ass down for a sec?

Hannah and Andre are talking and hes like I knew we werent a match and Im everyone at home is like wait you just told Alicia man, thats fucked up.

Andre and Hannah start making out because #drama.

Alicia starts flipping the fuck out and is like YOURE A LIAR AND A FLIRTER AND A MINGLER!!!

Whats a mingler? Just someone who mingles? I feel like thats real nondescript. Im going to need a full definition plz. DM me.

Andres like “THESE GIRLS ARE CATCHING FEELINGS!” Uh, its not just girls. Joeys over here acting like a baby back bitch.

Hoes, am I right?

THE MATCHUP

The boys get to pick tonight and this ought to be a shit show because none of them strike me as scholars.

Oswaldo picks KARI. Random, dont care.

Ozzy picks Kathryn because he wants that birthday sex. Ozzys like she makes me feel like home. Uh, Ozzy thats because you are home. Youre a local, your house is like, down the street.

Jaylen picks Kam, fucking up the thing she had with Eddie.

Eddie picks Shannon, womp womp.

Derrick pity picks Alicia.

Hayden, who is sporting a pair of capris, picks Taylor. Obviously Taylor wants to be with Tyler so this is def a surprise. She actually says those exact words and Hayden has now purchased a summer home on friendzone island.

Tyler says something fucking stupid about how Hayden is doing him a favor? Idk his foot is so far up his mouth and Taylors like 3 seconds away from putting her foot in his ass. So much for team normal.

Andre picks Hannah. Alicia is like “IT IS WHAT IT IS” but also wants to murder Hannah.

Michael caves and picks Gianna. WTF.

Joey picks Carolina and they kiss because THEY ARE DUMB THATS WHY.

Mike picks Casandra because shes his uptown girl.

Tyler picks Tee and they both are like, “Welp. Fuck me right?”

Okay, so this is sketch. Not looking so hot for them rn.

Were waiting for beams and Im drinking, thinking no fucking way are they going to blackout. Its only week 2. But in the words of President-Elect: The polls were wrong! The experts were wrong! Sad!

And yes, THEY BLACKOUT.

They all lost half a million dollars. Im laughing but its a nervous laugh because now they all are going to be on suicide watch or something.

Everyone has to deal with the fact that the person they are with is not their match. No Mike/Cas, Ozzy/Kathryn, Gianna/Michael, Joey/Carolina or Hannah/Andre. WOW. Major blow. Im loving this.

A sad song starts playing and people start crying. Damn, this just got as depressing as Mikes family life.

div.body_middle_part_right .bodypart:nth-child(n+2),a.prevBody{display:none;}