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bluejaysandblackbats · 2 months

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Almost There

Fandom: DC Comics, Flashfam

Summary: Everyone always knew Bart was eccentric, but the family becomes concerned when he starts talking to someone that doesn’t exist.

Chapters: 1/?

Characters: Bart Allen, Thad Thawne, Owen Mercer, Don Allen, Meloni Allen, Digger Harkness, Iris West, Barry Allen, Max Mercury, Helen Claiborne

Relationships: DonMeloni, BarryIris, WallyLinda

Additional Tags: Bart Allen-centric, Thad Thawne POV, No Powers AU, Imaginary Friends, Misdiagnosis, Blind Date, Hurt Bart Allen, Angst, Hurt/Comfort

Chapter One: We Were Six

We were six years old when Bart nearly died. Six. He was in the hospital for four days. It was the longest we’d ever been apart. I might’ve lost my mind if Owen hadn’t been there. I still feel like that sometimes when we’re apart… Like he’ll die and leave me missing the other piece of me. Bart’s never been careful, and I guess that’s why I’m sitting here writing all this. Someone has to write Bart’s story, and it should be me. Maybe it’ll help me be less afraid of losing him. Maybe it’ll make him more careful.

Okay. How do I start? Let’s try this:

We’re mirror-image twins. An extremely rare occurrence among twins. He was right-handed, and I was left. He had a birthmark on the left side of his chest at the bottom of his ribcage. I had the same birthmark on the right. Bart had a crooked grin where his lips curled up toward the right side of his face, and my grin curled up toward the left side. We did everything together, but we couldn’t be more different. I was shy, boring, and prone to emotional outbursts, while Bart was outgoing, odd, and unruffled. I wanted to be him sometimes. Absorb the best parts of him and walk around smiling his smile and laughing his laugh. But that’s beside the point. We’re mirror-image twins… And no one knows my twin better than I do. That’s why I know he’s not hallucinating. So don’t assume I’m writing this about my poor sick brother. I’m writing about the tragedy of strange gifts.

Bart was sick with pneumonia when we were six years old, and I was sure he’d die. I could feel it. It felt like the moment before you pass out, and your heart flutters and your head goes all fuzzy. I remember gripping the hospital bed's railing as the doctors tried to separate us. I couldn’t leave his side. The monitor beeped, alerting the nurses to his low oxygen level, and his eyes rolled back. I was twinless for eighty-five seconds. Eighty-five agonozing seconds. My body went cold, and Owen dragged me out of the room, kicking and screaming, but I couldn’t hear myself.

Then Grandpa Barry came out, and he rubbed my back. “It’s okay. Bart’s okay… They’ve got him back. He needs to rest, but he’ll be better once they stabilize him,” Grandpa Barry reassured me. He got us a pizza, and we ate in the parking lot that night because I refused to leave the hospital. Bart slept in a medically-induced coma for two days until the doctors said my brother could breathe without assistance, and I visited him on the third day. He sipped warm apple juice through a straw, and Mom held the cup.

None of us spoke. The room was eerily silent as we waited for Bart to speak. “Don’t go,” Bart rasped as he stared straight ahead. None of us moved. It was like he saw straight through us.

“Who’re you talking to, Bubba?” Dad asked.

“My friend… The lady,” Bart whispered, “She’s right there.”

Mom smiled and exhaled gently. “Oh, is she your age?” Mom questioned.

“No. My friend’s almost a grownup… Like Wally… Do you know her, Wally?” Bart asked. Wally knit his brows together and shook his head.

“Is she cute?” Wally asked. I couldn’t speak. They were all making jokes, and Bart was serious. I think he knew they didn’t believe him.

“She’s not laughing,” Bart muttered. I climbed into bed with him and laid my head on his shoulder.

“Bart? Do you want me to stay?” I asked. I wanted him to ask me, but I knew he wouldn’t. I wanted him to tell me he needed me, but he didn’t speak. He linked pinkies with me. That gesture meant everything to me. It was our I love you. It was our Never leave me.

It was the first time he mentioned his friend, but it wouldn’t be the last. To be honest, I was so preoccupied with being jealous of her that I never once doubted her existence. Bart didn’t get released from the hospital until the end of the week, but no one told me why he couldn’t come home. Not the real reason anyway. I was much older when Grandpa told me Bart had a brain examination. I felt terrible for all the years I joked about him getting his head checked.

Grandpa stayed home with Owen and me, playing games with us, while Mom, Dad, and Grandma stayed with Bart. We sat on the floor, gluing jigsaw puzzles with wood glue and small wooden boards. The jigsaws taught me a lesson. You start with the edges to see the picture. That was how people had to see Bart. Once you got Bart’s outer pieces, you could see him for what he was. And that’s how I managed to make sense of Bart’s gift my whole life.

Everyone thought he came back wrong, but no one would have known this was his gift all along. Even when the hospital discharged him, Bart didn’t get to come straight home. He got to stay with Uncle Max and Aunt Helen. Mom said he needed the extra attention and the wide-open space. I cried constantly during that time.

It wasn't until I stopped eating that they brought him home. I never had the words to say what I wanted from my parents, and it frustrated me to no end. Owen tried to understand, but no one knew the bond I had with Bart. No one could possibly understand how I felt. Not even Dad.

I had to be there when we picked him up at the airport. His eyes never fixed themselves on me. He always looked elsewhere. I wanted him to see me. Run to me. I wanted him to show signs that he loved me like I loved him. "Helen, she is real! You can't see her, but she's there! And she's not-!" I touched his hand.

"I missed you," I whispered, "Could you-?" I couldn't ask him for a hug. I was so terrified he'd say no.

"Let's go play," Bart replied angrily as he grabbed my hand. He led me away from the adults and toward the treehouse Grandpa built. We climbed up the ladder and shut the door. "They want to make her go away… I like her." He muttered something after that, but I couldn't understand it. To anyone else he would've seemed crazy, but I couldn't see him like that. It seemed strange to me that the adults were so frightened of Bart's friend. He liked her and they wanted her to go away. It didn't make any sense.

"Bart? Are you angry?" I asked. Bart looked away from me and nodded at the window before cradling my cheek and kissing my forehead. It was such a tender and compassionate gesture. Completely out of Bart's character.

That's how I knew she wasn't imaginary. I smiled our crooked grin and threw myself into his arms. "I can't see her, but I know she's there," I thought. I wanted to say it aloud, but I couldn't.

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cryptocism · 2 months

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Since I think about clones like I’m getting paid for it, I've been rotating those alternate universe "what if Bart and Thad were actually raised together" scenarios in my brain, with Thad either post-redemption-arc or pre-villainy. Because adjusting Thad's character to fit an ally role while still keeping true to his core motives and personality is so so fascinating to me.

Like I think there's an immediate first instinct to slot Thad into a "bad" twin category: ie rebellious and prickly, doesn't get along with people, mean lil shit. And obviously it's not wrong bc we're outside the realm of canon, but the reading still feels a little left of center.

Because Thad is mean and prickly in canon. In the Impulse comics he belittles Bart and Bart’s friends/family constantly in his appearances. He loves to goad, and monologue about his own superiority and intelligence. He’s very Not Nice, and he causes many problems, and he even does it on purpose.

But, I think it’s important to consider the context. From the jump Thad knows very little about anything except which team he’s on and who he’s playing for. He gets his orders from an unseen authority and he carries out his tasks because success means his team wins.

For all his self-aggrandizing talk, everything he does is in service of an end goal that doesn't actually center him. He's trying to get revenge for grievances he's never personally suffered, retribution for actions never committed against him. Everything he does is on someone else's behalf.

Thad sees in black and white, us or them. Up until the final few issues of Mercury Falling, Bart and co. are Thad's enemies, of course he's not going to be nice.

So Thad's motivation seems pretty simple: Thawne Supremacy™.

But it’s in Mercury Falling where this starts to fall apart, and the real core of his motivation gets revealed. Thad pretends to be Bart and suddenly Helen is nice to him. Bart’s friends think he’s funny. Bart’s teachers are impressed with his grades. Max ruffles his hair and gives him hugs and tells him he’s done a good job.

If he was actually an inherently mean and standoffish character, if Thad actually had significant personal stake in the Thawne VS Allen conflict, the weight of such tiny acts of kindness wouldn’t completely break him the way that it does in canon.

Thad thinks his goal is superiority and revenge and Thawne Supremacy™, but he's chasing validation. Thad doesn’t have a personal stake in the Thawne VS Allen conflict. He wouldn't get much satisfaction if he actually destroyed Bart and his family. Thad's personal victory would be the recognition after the fact: the praise and attention from the other Thawnes (a group of people he has literally never met) for his success.

He wants validation. That's basically it. And the fact that he gets it so easily from Bart's family and friends doesn't align with how he's told himself things are supposed to work.

Actually tangentially, Bart and Thad’s respective relationships to authority is so diametrically opposed and tbh kind of subversive in a superhero narrative. Where the hero is the one carving his own path without regard to social or societal rules, no fucks to give what anybody thinks of it. And the villain is a chronic people-pleaser.

Just based on Thad’s reaction to simple praise and affection from Max I really think Thad’s motivation has more to do with the response he gets than whatever the details are of any given task. He has no actual personal convictions beyond getting positive attention, and whatever he did have crumbled as soon as Bart’s friends laughed at his joke one time. Which of course leads into the core of his whole conflict at the end of Mercury Falling. He cares too much about Bart’s friends and family now, he doesn’t want to kill them, but worse than that, he’s faced with the sudden realization that he’s on the wrong side.

The Allens gave Thad everything he actually wanted and needed, but his conception of himself is inexorably tied to the Thawnes: who gave him jack shit. These two facts are in opposition to each other, and he can’t reconcile the reality of it.

Anyway all this to say, in an AU where Bart and Thad are raised together or Thad gets an actual redemption arc etc etc, I think my personal take on Thad’s personality whether it be pre-or-post-villainy would be one that is extremely socially conscious. He is much more of a people-person than Bart. Whether he's actually accurate in assessing people's feelings and how to respond to them can be hit or miss, but he wants to behave in a way that gets people to like him.

Pretending to be Bart isn’t remarked upon as, like, a difficult task for Thad. In his internal monologue he’s literally bragging to himself about how easy it is. But what’s especially notable to me is where his act differs from Bart's typical MO. Everyone notices, and lots of people comment, and presumably if Thad didn’t have the excuse of Max’s illness to “motivate” Bart to do better he would’ve been found out immediately. And those things are, specifically: paying attention in class, doing his chores, staying on task, and being helpful around the house. The one thing about Bart he chooses not to emulate is Bart’s rebelliousness.

Thad wants to prove himself, constantly, to whatever authority he respects (probably Max in this scenario) and will do whatever it takes to make that happen. In contrast to Bart, who only listens to authority when the shit they're saying actually makes sense to him. It’s excessively difficult to convince him to go against his own interests. (And I think a key part of that is Bart’s security in knowing that no matter how much he fucks up or doesn’t listen, the people he loves will always love him back.)

Thad’s got the people-pleaser in him that has to deserve whatever he’s given. It’s why he’s happiest when he’s given a clear goal or objective to complete, because it gives him an opening to prove himself.

All this to say that if we are quantifying Bart and Thad as a "good" or "bad" twin, in the eyes of every authority: Bart is the bad twin. Bart is the bad twin, Bart is the bad twin. Bart is the one who doesn’t care about school and whose grades vary wildly depending on his personal interest. He’s the one who goes off to do dangerous shit for fun and gets in trouble constantly and doesn’t do his chores and is thoroughly unconvinced by any authority figure trying to sell him bullshit.

Thad is the one who needs to know all the rules just so he can experience the joy of following them. Relentlessly obedient. He'll put all his effort into doing all the right things that’ll endear him to whoever he wants to impress - meaning he’s the asshole who reminds the teacher about the assigned homework. Bart might be the most popular boy in school, but Thad is a pleasure to have in class.

Like Thad can (and should) still be high-strung and short-tempered and sarcastic and edgy and mean, because he is. But he can’t be doing all that without rhyme or reason. Colouring every interaction has to be that one-zero binary of ally or enemy. He needs to have somebody he’s proving himself to: a team he’s on and a team he’s against. He’s not an inherently rebellious character. He can go up against The Enemy, whoever he deems as such, but it has to be in service of a hypothetical future in which somebody eventually tells him he did a great job.

And in the interest of continuing to beat a dead horse, it connects to their respective upbringings. Thad and Bart were both raised in VR, but Bart’s experience had the side effect of basically hard-wiring him against insecurity. His world was a playground tailor-made for him, and he was never made to feel bad or insufficient about any aspect of himself. His first interaction with a real human person was Iris moving heaven and earth to save him, without him knowing her, without her knowing him, with no reasoning for the act needed beyond Being Her Grandson. Which is probably a significant factor in why Bart moves through the world with frankly atomic levels of autistic swag.

Thad’s VR upbringing installed self-consciousness in his psyche before any other personality trait. As in: he is immediately made conscious of himself and his relationship with everyone he will ever encounter. He’s told two things: he’s a clone of someone else (inherently derivative, lesser) and that he was made to be superior (a status to achieve). Which is such an instant clarifier for Thad’s everything. Where superiority is a condition that everyone either has, or does not. It’s the one-zero binary again: are they better than me or am I better than them. Being above others is mandatory, and if his superiority is ever challenged by hard evidence or god forbid nuance Thad’s brain physically cannot take it. He needs to be better, to be worse is unthinkable, and there is no other way to be.

And this status of better or worse is, crucially, not up to Thad to decide. He needs The Authority to validate him. Bart never tries to prove himself because he has nothing to prove. Thad’s entire identity hinges on the self-worth he gets from doing a Good Job.

It is such an inherent part of his motives in the Impulse comics canon, which is why it always feels a little off when he’s interpreted as a jackass indiscriminately.

Like I don't think he needs everyone to like him. But I do think he has either one person or a set of very particular people that he needs to like him. Everyone else is either in that circle or outside of it.

(Which is why Bart is such a great foil for Thad tbh. There is no set of words or behaviors that’ll change Bart’s opinion of Thad, because Bart is unaffected by obedience or charm. So ironically Bart is probably one of few people that Thad doesn’t bother to put on even a little bit of an act for.)

While Bart goes with his instincts, his personal beliefs and convictions at all times, Thad is hyper-conscious of big-picture goals. They balance each other out that way. Thad's keeping track of whatever expectations he has placed on him, and how his actions reflect on him and the team beyond short-sighted solutions. He's a team player. AND he's an asshole.

#soapbox #dc #thad thawne #thaddeus thawne #inertia #bart allen #impulse #like he cannot be mean indiscriminately... u must interrogate WHY hes mean and to whom #if hes being raised with Max and Helen he would not intentionally do anything to make their lives more difficult #if hes being raised by Meloni same situation #he needs to be trying to get validation from SOMEWHERE u know #and of course he'll mess up and hurt the people he loves or wants to impress he is a human being #but while that can sometimes be the result #that is never the Goal u kno #not his Core Motivation #i feel like the more i talk about this the less sense im making

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arttuff · 4 months

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art trade with @melonlthawne !!!! I hope you enjoy :)

#dc comics #meloni thawne #bart allen #impulse #impulse 1995 #dc #melonis genes are STRONG i love that bart looks so much like his mama #flashfam #flash family #yj98 #young justice #Young Just Us #art trade

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nopes-and-dreams · 11 months

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“You got so big…” And they both hear it in her voice: The sorrow of lost time, missing years. Everything she missed. He offers a bittersweet smile of his own.

“Yeah, Mom…I got big.” He grew up missing her…but he grew up.

Meloni Thawne and her baby boy (no matter how big he gets.)

#crossposting since y'know #people decided to get my other art blog shadowbanned #flash family #impulse #impulse dc #bart allen #meloni thawne #flashfam #why y'all gotta make this take so many extra steps man

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spookyprime · 4 months

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Little panel redraw

#doodles #bart allen #meloni thawne

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sarahreadstoomanycomics · 1 year

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Happy Mother's Day

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sydcarmyfan · 3 months

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I want it to be a slowburn, but I don’t think I can wait 20+ years

#just kiss please #Betweeen Mariska/Chris and Ayo/Jeremy I don’t know who is trolling us more #when the slowburn is burning slow #sydcarmy #ayo edebiri #jeremy allen white #the bear #law and order svu #christopher storer #dick wolf #bensler #mariska hargitay #chris meloni

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redwiccanrobin · 5 months

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(Impulse #73)

#dc comics #the flash family #bart allen #meloni thawne

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melonlthawne · 2 months

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the pic that inspired it all……. original image not mine just the doodles of Bart Mel n Thad are. I meant to make this like six months ago rip but it’s still super cute and funny. Bart wants to explore and Thad has resigned himself to the floor after Mel didn’t let him kick someone in the shins

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radioactive-earthshine · 3 months

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Once every few months I have to remind new followers who may be new to the Flash fandom that (likely through accident on the writers part) Owen Mercer "Captain Boomerang Jr" is in fact, Bart Allen's half brother through his mother. They never meet, this is never acknowledged directly in the comics, they never find out that they are half brothers and it is likely no one in continuity knows they are half brother except Meloni herself. The amount of people who know the name of Bart's mother as it is can be counted on one hand in continuity. Iris likely doesn't even know either because Iris thought Meloni had died shortly after Bart was said to have been dead by the Science Police (thus why she never reached out to Meloni when she found out he was in fact alive).

The whole situation is bonkers and DC just be sittin on it like a hen on a lightbulb.

#bart allen #owen mercer #meloni thawne #flashfam #fr i don't think the writers KNEW they were brothers and just picked a rando future woman not knowing who she was to have owen

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bluejaysandblackbats · 2 months

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Almost There

Fandom: DC Comics, Flashfam

Summary: Everyone always knew Bart was eccentric, but the family becomes concerned when he starts talking to someone that doesn’t exist.

Chapters: 2/?

Characters: Bart Allen, Thad Thawne, Owen Mercer, Don Allen, Meloni Allen, Digger Harkness, Iris West, Barry Allen, Max Mercury, Helen Claiborne

Relationships: DonMeloni, BarryIris, WallyLinda

Additional Tags: Bart Allen-centric, Thad Thawne POV, No Powers AU, Imaginary Friends, Misdiagnosis, Blind Date, Hurt Bart Allen, Angst, Hurt/Comfort

Chapter Two: Float

When Bart and I were eight, we went to the swamp to sail paper boats on the water. It was one of the rare times that Bart asked to play with me. We put on our rain boots and trudged through the marsh. I crouched beside the pond blowing on our boats to push them across the water. “Do you think they’ll stop beating me up if I stop bringing CRAYDL to school?” I asked as I reached up to touch the corner of my healing black eye. It didn’t hurt to the touch anymore, but that didn’t make a difference to Bart.

“They’re gonna stop beating you up because I told ‘em to stop. Mom said I could beat them up if they keep bothering you,” Bart replied as he dislodged a stone from the mud with his foot. He’d been working at it for a while.

“Dad says it won’t always be like this at school for me,” I replied.

“Yeah, if I beat them up-.”

“Why does everyone wanna fight all the time? Dad says we should fight with our minds-.”

“I’ll headbutt one of ‘em for you,” Bart replied, “Sometimes you gotta beat people up. They’re not being fair to you. They’re beating you up.”

“I guess you’re right,” I mumbled, “Still, I wish it wouldn’t have to be that way.”

He grew quiet, so I followed the boats around, twirling them in tiny circles. “Bart, why don’t you come close and play?” I asked. He didn’t answer, so I turned around, and he was gone. “Bart?”

My blood ran cold as my brain flooded with images of a certain child-eating clown. I shook as I grabbed our boats and tiptoed through the marsh alone. “Bart, please stop hiding… I don’t like hide-and-go-seek,” I murmured. I could feel someone watching me, but I was too afraid to look back. I walked a little faster. I couldn’t shake the feeling that someone was behind me. My stomach turned, and my feet stopped working.

I went cold as I felt a breath on my neck. I thought my heart would burst in my chest. “You’ll float too,” a clown-ish voice whispered in my ear, and I let out such a bloodcurdling scream that I threw up and wet myself. “Aw, man! Thad, I’m-.” I burst into tears, and Owen picked me up. “It’s alright. I shouldn’t have scared you so bad.”

His friend squealed with laughter. “It’s not funny, dingus! He’s crying! My mom’s gonna kill me!” Owen snapped. He kissed my temple. “Please stop crying, Bubba. I’ll give you-. Wait, where’s Bart?”

I started crying even harder. “I was looking for Bart! He disappeared!” I wailed. Owen rubbed my back.

“It’s okay. I bet you Bart went home or something. He couldn’t have gotten far. Let’s look together. Okay?” Owen reassured me. He hiked up the hill to the street, where Bart walked along the sidewalk. “Bart!”

He didn’t respond, but I heard him. I heard him speaking to someone. “Linda, wait!” Bart hollered as he ran across the street.

“Bart, no!” Owen screamed. He saw it before anyone else. The car hit Bart so hard it knocked his shoes off, and I threw myself out of Owen’s arms. I scraped my knees, and I crawled to him. Someone tried to grab me, but I screamed and fought. “Axel! Go get somebody! Go get my Mom! Get someone, please!”

Owen screamed and cried until the older boy got out of the car. He pushed him and wept. “You hit my brother! That’s my brother!” Owen shouted. The bakery was only three blocks from the swamp, but Axel was smart enough to use a pay phone at the corner to call Mom.

She ran there on foot with Dad and Auntie Dawn. Auntie Dawn pulled Owen away from the older boy and held on tight. Dad grabbed me from whoever held onto me.

“Thad, what happened? Why-? Why are you wet?” Dad asked. I couldn’t stop shaking or crying.

“Bubba, he-. Daddy-. I can’t breathe,” I panicked. Dad blew on my face like he did when I was little, but it didn’t help. The ambulance came, and they carried Bart away with Mom. Dad took Owen and me home. Dad ran me a bath, but I was in shock. I couldn’t move. He took a cup of water and sat it on the tub before supporting my neck in his palm and rinsing my hair. “It’s gonna be alright, Spud… I wish you-. I’m worried about you,” Dad whispered, “Please say something.”

“What happened to our boats?” I asked. “I had them in my hand.”

Dad wrapped me in towels and pulled the drain before placing two large dinosaur bandages on my skinned knees. “I can work with that. I’ll make you both ten boats each. I’m gonna make my world-famous Philly Joes. I won’t make yours sloppy… Okay?” Dad asked.

“Can you tell me what I am?” I asked.

“You’re my littlest human. You draw the best dinosaur pictures I’ve ever seen. You and I don’t use the t-word because you’re your own person. Aren’t you?” Dad asked. He gave me that little pep talk whenever I felt responsible for something that happened to Bart. I dressed and followed Dad to the living room, where Owen lay in his pajamas, flipping through channels. I lay beside Owen on the couch, and he draped his arm over me.

“Why would he do that?” Owen mumbled.

I didn’t answer. Owen tightened his hold around me. “What do you feel, kiddo? Is he alright?” Owen asked. He knew I felt things Bart did sometimes.

“Nothing but our heads hurt,” I replied. Owen kissed the top of my head.

“I’m sorry for scaring you,” Owen apologized, “That wasn’t funny. You didn’t deserve that.”

Owen wasn’t a bully by any means. He loved Bart and me. So, I knew he didn’t mean any harm when he scared me earlier. “It’s okay,” I whispered.

“My dad’s gonna come watch us tonight after dinner. Your dad’s going to the hospital to check on Bart,” Owen whispered. Owen must’ve been torn up about the car accident because he was always excited to see Digger. Digger wasn’t the most responsible grown-up I ever met, but he loved Owen more than anything.

Owen tightened his grip on me so much it almost hurt, and he sat up, still holding me. “Don! Don!” Owen yelled. Dad ran into the room in his apron with latex gloves on.

“What’s wrong, kiddo?” Dad asked, half out of breath.

I felt water hit the top of my head. “Where are Bart’s rain boots? He had rain boots on, and they came off when-. They came off. Did somebody get his boots?” Owen asked as he started to cry.

Dad frowned and crouched in front of Owen and me. “Hey, the EMTs got his boots and put them in a plastic bag. I know it looked scary, but Bart’s gonna be okay-.”

“I should’ve paid more-.”

“You’re a wonderful brother, and I love you so much,” Don whispered, “You care so much… And I’m so grateful that you’re the oldest.” He messed up Owen’s hair.

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