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blxetsi · 3 years

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Imagine pampering Reiner. I would love to kiss him silly 🙈 is it obvious he’s my favorite character?

id like to kiss him silly too 🤩🤚 tysm for the request !!!

pampering reiner after a long day (modern au)

warnings: taking care of ur man 😁👍 uhh construction worker!reiner (of age, obv), gn!reader, face care n shit idk, cute names like baby and love, mentions of sexual harrasment/assault in a workplace.

living in the city had it ups and downs. well, so did everything in life, but you never really thought about that until you moved into the city. you and reiner both came from a small town, and then went to the same college in a bigger town, before you two decided to move to the big city together. downs happened more often than ups, but anything was an up if you were with reiner. rent was expensive, especially for the shoebox of an apartment you two live in, but youve both made it into your home, a cozy little sanctuary away from the rest of this chaotic world. another down was that the city never sleeps, someone, somewhere was always working, and you too found yourself taking nightshifts at the diner you worked at. it was minimum wage, and middle aged men and women would come in and flirt (more like harass), but your coworkers were nice, and if you made sure to dress up a bit you'd get a fat tip.

you and reiner originally thought that you'd get well paying jobs as soon as you moved into the city, which was a lie. considering the time, effort, and money you both put into getting your degrees, you thought you were more than qualified for certain jobs, but you werent, and that sucked, and now your boyfriend over works himself physically building houses while you let freaks make weirdly sexual comments about you so you can earn more money. it sucks on both ends, but you know that you'd do anything to be with reiner, so you could take a couple of gropes and sleazy jokes.

today you had gotten off work early, your boss closing the store because of a family emergency. you felt bad for the man, he was nice, and offered to switch you to dish duty when he'd seen older people be weird with you, you'd declined knowing that you wouldn't earn as much in the back. he was a family man, and generous, and cared about others, which was a nice change from other employers in the past. you were surprised reiner wasn't home yet, because today was friday, and he usually got off fridays around six, but now it was almost nine, and you were starting to get a bit worried.

just as you started gnawing on your lip, your phone vibrated beside you. grabbing it you saw it was reiner calling you, and quickly paused your episode of shameless to answer. "rei, where are you ?"

"just got off work baby." he sighed.

he sounded exhausted, and you could hear cars honking so you knew he was outside.

"do you need me to come get you ?"

"no, its okay. jack's giving me a ride home."

you let out a breath, at least he didn't have to wait for the bus, getting a ride meant he'd be home faster. "okay my love. you want me to run you a bath for when you come home ?" you knew how sore reiner got from working, and being out in the sun all day. with the weather becoming warmer it would become harder on him, and he'd always forget to wear sunscreen which meant he'd burn.

he let out a soft moan. "that sounds great baby, thank you so much."

you heard talking from his end, assuming it was jack. you tried to keep listening but reiner's voice cut in again. "only ten more minutes and im back to you."

you smiled, getting excited that he'd be here so soon. "okay lovey, i'll get that bath started. i love you."

you could hear his smile on the other end. "i love you too baby, thank you so much."

you quickly said your goodbyes before hanging up, cutting him off. you felt a bit bad but quickly brushed it off as you walked to your bathroom. you got everything together, moving from the bathroom to your bedroom and back again. you set out a clean towel, a pair of sweats and a white tank top for him, as well as a hoodie if he was cold. you filled up the tub, making sure it was hot, before adding a cup of epsom salt and stirring it around with your hand. you got up again, going to the kitchen area of your little home and filling up a cup with a jug of cold water from the fridge. you brought it back to the small bathroom, sitting it on the tank cover of the toilet. he needed to be hydrated.

you were changing the sheets of your shared bed when you heard the from door open, close, then lock. reiner dropped his backpack and toed off his shoes. he hung up his jacket before slowly walking around the apartment, cracking his neck and stretching his arms above his head. "baby ? where are you ?"

"in here rei, just changing the sheets." you called out. you could hear his heavy footsteps make his way down the hall towards you.

he thought you looked beautiful. dressed in just a tee shirt (his tee shirt) and plaid pyjama pants, the lights from the city reflecting all around the room and on your body, a small lamp which casted a soft warm glow around the room, made your eyes shine.

"you don't have to change the sheets baby." he whispered, making his way over to you. he helped you put the comforter over the bed. a simple grey colour, which matched the baby pink sheets and pillow cases.

"i wanted to. you always feel good sleeping in new sheets." you answered, making your way around the bed to him. you wrapped your arms around his torso while he wrapped his around your shoulders, pulling you close and kissing your head. he sighed, and just held you while you rubbed his back.

"your bath is ready, and i left you clothes for you there too." you whispered. he hummed in response before squeezing you tighter.

"i missed you so much." his words were soft, but held a lot of weight, and your heart hurt because you knew he was working himself to the bone.

"it's okay baby, i'm here now."

he nodded before kissing your head again. he smelt your hair, sighing before pulling back to look at your face. "did you shower ?"

"when i got home, yeah."

"okay. i won't be long then."

you shook your head, moving your arms so you could hold his face in your hands. "no rei, take all the time you need. i'll wait for you." you knew that reiner was too tired to fight you on that, so he simply nodded, giving you a soft kiss before stripping down to his underwear and leaving the room.

you put his clothes in the hamper, putting his wallet on his bedside table and plugging his phone in to charge. then you opened up the window so the cool breeze could come in, you knew reiner liked the room to be a bit cooler at night.

slowly you made your way to the bathroom, peaking in to see him in the bath, the water up to his neck as he was almost fully submerged. his eyes were closed and his breathing was slow, you could see his tan lines from working. his muscles that bulged even when relaxed and the crinkles in his eyes from smiling so much, even when he was so young. his stuble which was just a bit darker than his sandy blond hair, and his calloused hands from his labour, wrapped around his torso in a hug. those hands that held you, that protected you, that tickled you, that loved you. you never got to admire reiner often, usually because he'd notice early on and tell you to stop, he'd get all flustered and his face would turn red, getting all blushy that his lover wanted to look at how beautiful he was. and he was, reiner was gorgeous, and its a blessing to call him yours.

his voice was raspy from not speaking for so long. "baby, stop looking at me like that." you could see the apples of his cheeks turn pink while his lips quirked up into a small.

"i can't help it, you're just so pretty." you replied, walking into the small bathroom and closing the door behind you. it took less than two steps to get towards him, and you crouched down beside the tub to look at him closer.

he slowly opened his eyes, like he was in a daze, before peeling an arm away from his body and holding it out for you to take. you grabbed his hand with both of yours, rubbing his palm and fingers while you softly kissed his knuckles. you two never looked away as you did so, relishing in the soft moment together.

he closed his eyes again, and sighed while moving deeper into the tub, making the water go from his neck to his chin, and his long legs stick out of the water at the knees. "you know that face mask you have baby ? the one that peels off and makes your face smooth ?" he asked, his voice echoing throughout the room.

"yeah," you mumbled against his hand. "you wanna use it ? want me to put it on for you ?"

he nodded. you slowly put his hand back into the water before crawling to the cabinet under the sink, reaching for your peel off face mask, you turned around and went back to your love, shifting as close as you could ger before the toilet got in the way, before opening the tube and squeezing some onto your hand. the clear gel felt cool on your finger tips, and you rubbed it along both pointer and middle finger on your two hands, before leaning over the side of the tub and rubbing some on his face. you made sure to keep it away from his facial hair and his eyebrows. after rubbing it in you rinsed your hands off in the bathwater, before moving them to hold reiner's hand again. "if you cant peel some if it off after its dry just rinse with warm water, okay ?" reiner nodded before squeezing your hand. "thank you baby."

you two sat in silence for a couple of minutes, just listening to each others breathing and the slight swish of the water. "i'm gonna make some tea, would you like any ?" you asked.

reiner shook his head. "i'll just steal a sip of yours."

you chuckled before kissing the back of his hand, a smile on your face. "okay my love, i'll wait for you in the bedroom."

he leaned over quickly, grabbing your face with his free hand and giving you a soft kiss, over and over again. his lips were a bit chapped, which caused your own to tickle, but to him it felt great. this was so domestic, so simple, it made him feel safe, it made reiner forget all about his horrible day. all he could think about was you, all he could feel was you.

because of your kiss some of the product from his face mask had transferred onto yours, causing him to giggle before wiping it away with his pruny hand. "i love you so much baby. i'm so happy to be with you." he whispered, his face millimetres from your own.

"thank you rei, i love you too." you responded. you loved him so much, you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him. and you're sure you will.

you pecked his lips before kissing his hand one more time, then you got up and left the bathroom, reiner's eyes on you as you went.

you went about tidying up the living room, putting away reiner's dinner on the table (if he didn't scarf it down when he came in, you knew he wouldn't touch it until tomorrow) turning off the tv and folding up the blanket you were snuggled up with on the couch almost an hour ago.

you quickly boiled your water for your tea, getting out your favourite mug and putting the tea bag in. then you went into your bedroom, where you moved through the open window to sit on the fire escape. the breeze of the night brought with it a chill, and you wished you'd brought that blanket with you. the lights and the cars moving down brought comfort to you. after living here for over a year, the noise became berable to you, just second nature.

you could hear faint shuffling inside the bedroom, before reiner's head popped out of the window. "i was looking everywhere for you."

you gave him a sheepish smile. "sorry my love, would you like to join me ?" he nodded and crawled out of the window too, which was a bit hard considering his long limbs. he sat down beside you, his skin looking soft and smooth, his hair wet and all dressed in his hoodie and sweats.

the two of you huddled together, watching people walk by and cars drive around, looking into the windows of other apartments and stores, seeing if you could see the people inside doing weird things. you two passed the mug of tea between each other, before all that was left was the wet tea bag at the bottom of the cup. reiner reached up and set it on the window sill, before pulling you into his side by your shoulders.

"do your muscles hurt still ?" you asked.

reiner shook his head before replying. "not anymore, thank you again for the bath."

you giggled, turning your head to look up at him, he looked down at your own head, resting on his shoulder, and matched the smile that painted your lips. "you don't have to thank me so much silly, i love taking care of you."

he rubbed his nose against your own. "i love taking care of you too. which is why i was thinking of looking for a new job."

your eyes opened again and he watched your reaction closely. "that tech company near downtown, they're looking for a new software developer. i've already set up an interview, i just didn't know when to tell you." he whispered.

your eyes lit up as you smiled again, leaning up and smacking kisses all over his face. he let out a loud laugh before cupping your face with his hand, guiding your head away from his own so he could speak, but you started talking before that could happen. "i'm so happy for you. i hate seeing you come home so tired and in pain."

he nodded. "and i hate seeing you come home with a new story of some creep making moves on the love of my life." he replied, giving you a soft kiss.

you two sat in silence again. reiner felt happy that you weren't upset about his idea for a new job, he had a degree, and a great mind, and he somehow knew he'd get this job.

"y'know," you started. "that new art museum that opened near the science centre, they're hiring too. said on their website they're looking for tour guides."

reiner pulled you closer to him, if that was even possible. "baby you'd be great at that. you know so many art things."

"'art things?'" you laughed. "yeah, maybe i'll call and see if i could get an interview."

reiner nodded. "that sounds great baby. but tomorrow, your tea made me so sleepy and now i just wanna sleep." you shook your head with a chuckle before pecking him on the lips again.

you two made your way inside, closed the window, and got ready for bed. while you put the mug back into the kitchen sink, reiner took off his hoodie and unfolded the comforter from the bed, ready to get under. when you came back inside you shut off the lamp and got in beside him, where reiner immediately pulled you into his chest.

your head rested on his bare pec, and you could hear his heart thumping. he was calm, content, and happy with you in his arms. and you two went to bed that night with dreams about your future together.

not me going overboard with that one 😁👍 anyways love u all stay safe requests r open 😍🙏

#attack on titan #attack on titan fanfiction #attack on titan x reader #reiner braun #reiner braun x gn!reader #reiner braun x reader #reiner braun headcanons #modern au #shingeki no kyoujin #shingeki no kyoujin x reader #shingeki no kyoujin imagine #attack on titan reiner #aot reiner #attack on titan requests

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ncssian · 3 years

Text

A Favor: Part Four

Nessian Modern AU

Masterlist

a/n: hey y'all. my new job has been draining the life out of me so i have very little energy left for writing, which is why these updates are taking so long. im still very passionate about this fic though, it just takes me more time to write :(

in other news, this chapter is saturated with descriptions of pain, both physical and emotional. i hated writing it but it was worth it.

***

Nesta, 14

Sometimes it all becomes too much. Feyre asking for help with homework and Elain begging for more money to go to the strip mall, and their dad ignoring them all as if they aren’t even there. Sometimes she wants to leave it all behind and pretend she isn’t anchored to three other people, wants to pretend she is a lone being in a lonely world.

When she needs to go away, she comes here.

Cherrywood House is quiet, as it always is this time of year. One of several expensive vacation homes in the Smokies, Cherrywood is Nesta’s favorite for a multitude of reasons— it’s empty for ten out of twelve months of the year, it’s the only house with a clear view of the nearby lake, and cherry blossoms bloom on trees out in the back every spring.

It’s early June, and she has a few more weeks left with the house until its owners return. The family that owns the place never leaves a trace of themselves behind when they leave each August, so Nesta returns the favor by never leaving hints of her inhabitance either.

She takes her worn Converse and socks off at the back porch and climbs in through the unlocked window barefoot. This is where she belongs. A ghost roaming the empty halls, with no one to care for and no one to care for her.

She makes her way upstairs to her preferred hideout spot: an airy bedroom with a bay window seat that looks out onto the cherry blossom trees outside. Cracking the window open to let the fragrance of flowers in, she settles into the bench seat with her book of the week and starts reading.

Absorbed in dreams of deep love and deeper kisses, Nesta doesn't notice the sun going down until she can barely make out the words on the page before her. Glancing up with sore eyes, she realizes she needs to leave soon if she doesn't want to take the wooded path back home in the dark.

“Damn,” she sighs, but she gets up and shuts the window firmly.

She keeps her nose in her book all the way down the hall and down the stairs, and doesn't sense anything off until a large shadow flashes in the corner of her eye. Her head whips up, and the face that greets her looks just as surprised as she is.

Nesta freezes.

“Um,” the guy says. He’s maybe a few years older than her, seventeen or eighteen, and tall with shaggy dark hair. The front door of the house is still cracked open behind him. “What the fuck?”

Nesta unfreezes. And then she runs.

All the way through the main hall and to the back door, while the boy’s shouts chase her through the house. “Hey, wait up!”

They weren't supposed to be here this early—

Her hand wraps around the back door handle and she flings it open, shoving through the second screen door and shooting right down the porch steps. Heavy steps behind her ignite a panic in her, and she gains a burst of speed.

“HEY!” he calls again. Soft grass becomes dirt and twigs beneath Nesta's feet, and she knows she's reached the tree line. Dark shadows fall over her as she darts into the safety of the woods.

Still standing on the back porch and waving a raggedy pair of Converse, Cassian tries calling for the girl one more time. “You forgot your shoes!”

Cassian wakes up at five in the morning to the sound of the house’s pipes creaking, a telltale sign that someone is using one of the faucets. Blinking his eyes open, he hears the distant sound of the shower running.

Who would get up in the freezing cold at this hour just to take a shower? He checks the time once more to make sure he isn't imagining things, and gets up to peek his head out of his bedroom. Sure enough, light leaks out from under the bathroom door.

Cassian walks up to the bathroom and listens closely for any sound beside running water. He knocks hesitantly. “Nesta?”

Her muffled voice calls back to him, but he can't make out a thing.

“Are you alright?” he asks. “How long have you been in there?”

There’s no response, and now he’s concerned. Raising his voice, he says, “I’m going to come in to hear you better, is that okay?”

A soft affirmative answers him, and he tries the doorknob. It’s already unlocked, which is odd, but he pokes his head into the steam-filled bathroom cautiously. “Nesta?”

From behind the curtain of the shower, a pale, tired face appears. She’s sitting on the floor of the tub, he realizes. “Hey,” she attempts a feeble smile at him.

Cassian fully enters the bathroom, the humidity dampening his skin. “Are you okay? When did you get up?”

“I’ve only been in here for an hour, maybe.” Her voice is weak enough that he has to move closer to hear her. “Don’t worry about your water bill. I’ll pay it, I swear.”

He shakes his head, confounded. “I don’t care about the water bill. You still haven’t told me if you’re okay.” He moves to crouch beside the bathtub, the opaque shower curtain the only barrier between them.

Nesta rolls her eyes, looking embarrassed. “It’s just cramps. I get really sick on my periods, and I would have warned you that they suck ass, but that would imply that my period could affect you. It doesn’t have to affect you— if you just leave me to myself for a few days, I won’t even be a bother.”

Cassian blinks, not really knowing where to start with that, so he just says, “But why the shower?”

Nesta shifts uncomfortably behind the curtain. “Sometimes hot water is the only thing that helps with the pain. I already tried getting out of the shower, but it hurt so bad— I had to go right back in. I’ll get out eventually, don’t worry.”

Cassian frowns. This all sounds incredibly worrying. “This is normal for you?”

She’s about to answer when her face pinches in a look of discomfort. “Cassian,” she says, strained.

He leans closer, wanting to help. “Yeah?”

“Get out.” She doesn't look like she has the energy to add anything else.

Cassian wants to defy Nesta and stay right there, but that would require arguing with her, and she clearly is no longer in the mood to hold up a conversation.

Reluctantly, he nods. “I’ll be right down the hall. Yell if you need anything.”

Nesta is already sinking lower into the tub, trying to get more fully under the burning hot spray. Her eyes drift closed and she hums in answer.

Cassian doesn't return to his room like he said he would, but heads downstairs instead. He spends a good ten minutes reading the drug labels of various painkillers from the medicine cabinet before carefully arranging a nonlethal cocktail of them on a tray. He adds a cold glass of water and various handpicked snacks before returning upstairs to set the tray by Nesta’s bedside, and turns the heat all the way up to combat the chill in her room, just in case.

Then he goes back to his room and waits. He tries to listen closely for the sound of the shower stopping, but he’s not used to being up this early on a Saturday, and his bed is so warm…

He falls asleep waiting.

***

Nesta stumbles out of the shower long after Cassian leaves her and downs a handful of pills without thinking too much about who left them for her. She already has an idea of how the next few days will go, and she just hopes Cassian will allow her the dignity to suffer through it alone.

She crawls into bed exhausted and shuts her eyes tight. The next time she opens them, sunlight is streaming weakly through the windows. Jarring pain lances through her abdomen, and she brings her legs all the way up to her chest and whimpers. From the edge of her consciousness, she notices the snack tray has been replaced with lunch— some leftover lasagna from the night before. Sneaking out her hand from her mountain of blankets, she goes for her phone. A text sent nearly an hour ago waits for her.

Cassian: please eat.

Nesta glares at the lasagna because she knows better. She might have spent this morning eyeing the bathroom tiles to determine if they were clean enough for her to curl up there and die, but she's not at a point to abandon her dignity just yet. The last thing her roiling nausea needs is solid food. Instead, she gathers the focus to text back Cassian: Leave me alone today.

It's only after she sends the message that she realizes it sounds harsh, but she can't bring herself to explain further or to soften her tone. Her pain always has a way of stripping her of any defenses and formalities and leaving only a primal creature behind.

Turning her phone off, she closes her eyes and inhales tightly through her nose. A wave of cramps that feels closer to what a brutal stabbing victim would feel like overtakes her, and— no, she has to get up.

During times like these, the bathroom is Nesta’s favorite place in the whole world. Cool tiles to rest her head on, hot water just a foot away, and a spacious tub if she ever feels like passing out. Heaven. Naturally, she escapes there first.

After maybe another hour of restless writhing and moving about, Nesta decides the suffering isn't worth it and hobbles downstairs in search of some Nyquil to knock her out. She’s got the medicine cabinet halfway open when a broad hand slams it back shut, and she turns to find Cassian standing behind her with a stern look. “You haven’t eaten anything all day. You can’t take meds on an empty stomach.”

Nesta wants to cry at the denial of pain relief, but she grips the counter behind her and manages a glare instead. “You can’t tell me what to do.”

“I will absolutely tell you not to wreck your liver, and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

A desperate whine escapes her, and she can’t believe Cassian has to see her like this. Even worse, she sees sympathy soften his face as his hand slips off the cabinet next to her head. “I made soup,” he offers. “Can you have soup?”

Nesta hesitates. Her insides don’t hate the idea of soup. She nods.

***

Nesta insisted on avoiding Cassian for the rest of the day, and Cassian graciously eased off her back once he knew she’d eaten. He kindly pretended he didn’t hear her running back and forth from the bathroom all day because she couldn’t sit still, and only interrupted her once to make sure she took more Tylenol before bed.

Now, long after night has fallen, Nesta is truly alone. Her medicine either hasn’t kicked in yet or isn’t strong enough to do its job tonight. She can barely think straight, and this is when the most primal part of herself comes out.

Despite her age, despite everything, she still cries. She cries as if anyone would bother listening, physical pain intertwining with the pain and humiliation of being ignored. “Papa,” she calls into her pillow, again and again.

She hasn’t trusted her papa in years, and yet she still expects him to rescue her. She still waits for him to show up and make everything better.

A hot tear leaks from her eye, and the catharsis of it distracts from her cramps. She curls up into a ball and cries harder, as if she can weep out everything that’s wrong with her body.

A soft knock interrupts her helpless whimpers, and Nesta hears the door open a moment later. “Nesta? Were you calling for me?”

Somebody came. No one’s ever come for her before.

A sigh of relief escapes her, and she forgets to put her walls up. “I’m just—” she tries to say, “so tired.”

She hears Cassian come farther into the room and curse. “Fuck, it’s an icebox in here.”

A hand nudges at her mound of comforters, giving Nesta’s shoulder a shake. “You should’ve told me the heater wasn’t working. Are you okay?”

That question sets her on edge. “Do I look okay?” her voice cracks. She wants to cry even harder now that he’s here, for some reason.

“Obviously not,” he mutters. “You’re staying in my room tonight. Get up.”

Nesta groans and burrows further into her freezing cocoon of sheets. “Don’twannamove.”

“It’s either that or I’m carrying you. I’m good either way.”

Nesta finally cracks her eyes open, glad that Cassian is only a tear-blurred figure in the dark. She doesn’t want to read whatever is on his face right now. Gathering her heavy comforter around herself, she gets up and lets Cassian lead her down the hall to his room.

Toasty warmth hits her as soon as she’s inside, and she makes an exhausted sound and drops the comforter. In a blur, she’s tucked into Cassian’s bed, enveloped by his scent and his lingering body heat on the sheets. Under the dim lamplight, Cassian seems to finally take notice of the tear tracks on her face. Clicking his tongue in sympathy and concern, he rubs his thumb over the sensitive skin under Nesta’s eyes. Her whole body shudders under the gentle touch. Who knew just the pad of his finger could combat this inescapable agony?

“This isn’t normal,” he murmurs. “I’m taking you to a doctor as soon as this storm clears.”

If Nesta was in the right state of mind, she’d tell him absolutely not. However, she’s barely comprehending his words as it is, so she watches him click the lamp off in silence. Darkness fills the room, but she can hear him moving.

“I’ll be right back,” his voice rumbles, and then she’s alone again. More tears leak at the feeling of abandonment. She’s so sick of herself.

After what feels like an eternity but is only a few minutes, she hears Cassian return. The mattress dips behind her as he climbs under the blankets with her, and then Nesta feels something hot and dry being pressed to her side. A towel. “Does this help?” he murmurs, his voice surprisingly close to her ear.

Wordlessly, Nesta reaches down and takes his hand holding the hot towel, dragging it beneath the hem of her sweater so the heat burns against her bare skin. She sighs and allows her tensed body to sag, leaning back into the hard cradle of Cassian’s chest and arms.

In her ear, Cassian’s breathing has gone shallow. His hand slips from her side, only to find her back and start rubbing up and down.

Her eyes flutter shut.

“My mother was a Muslim immigrant from Algeria,” Cassian whispers out of nowhere. “And whenever I felt sick as a little kid, I would crawl into her lap and she would rub my back just like this, and say some prayers and blow on my face, and I would feel better.”

Nesta makes a weak sound of acknowledgment. That sounds nice, nicer than anything she ever knew growing up.

“I’m sorry I don’t know any prayers,” Cassian says. Then, Nesta feels a whoosh of breath tickle the side of her face. “Does that help?”

It feels weirdly good, and Nesta's shoulders start shaking. She doesn't know if she's holding in a laugh or a sob. Cassian’s hand stills on her back. “Nesta?”

A sharp wave of pain sets her straight. After she breathes through it, she tells him, “You don't need to pray. Just… keep talking to me.”

His hand resumes drawing circles on her back. “Alright.” And he whispers stories into her ear for the rest of the night, until she's fallen asleep and long afterward.

The next morning, Nesta is feeling much better. Cassian knows this because she’s sitting in the living room when he comes downstairs, straight-backed instead of hunched over in pain, and she’s regained the energy to glare at him.

Cassian’s relief at seeing Nesta okay hesitates at that glare. He slows on the bottom step. “How’re you feeling, sweetheart?”

“Don't call me that.”

He blinks, not sure what he did wrong. Before he can ask, Nesta says, “You didn't listen to me.”

“Excuse me?” He strolls deeper into the living area.

“I told you to leave me alone while I'm on my period, and you didn't listen. You dragged me to your room and made me spend the night with you.”

“You were crying for help,” Cassian says in disbelief. “What was I supposed to do? Ignore you?”

“Yes.” She looks even angrier. “It’s humiliating for me to have you see me like that. It's humiliating to have my own family see me like that.”

“I’m sorry you feel that way, but you’re—” He almost says overreacting, but some deep instinct tells him that word won’t fly well with Nesta. “You’re wrong,” he decides. “Whatever you think I’m thinking of you after last night, you’re wrong.” Cassian has no problem going into caretaker mode for Nesta; it's his natural state of being most of the time anyway. Besides, last night was… a new experience for him. For a multitude of reasons. “You can't tell me you go through that every month and have never had anybody take care of you.”

“I haven't, and for good reason,” Nesta seethes. “You had no right to see me like that.”

Cassian leans on the arm of a chair and crosses his arms, considering her. “Have you ever seen a doctor about your period?”

“That’s none of your business,” she snaps. Here is the Nesta that Feyre is always talking about: quick to anger and always on the defense, to the point that she comes off as unreasonable. Nothing like the helpless woman in tears from just the night before.

It brings out a rougher side of Cassian, one that wants to nip and bite at her boundaries instead of letting her be comfortable all the time. “That’s no way to talk to someone who stayed up all night to wait on you hand and foot, you know.”

“Don’t you dare hold that against me.” Nesta’s voice is dangerously cold.

“I’m not holding it against you. I’m taking you to a doctor.”

“No.”

“I already made an appointment.”

“Cancel it.” Her voice is brittle and she’s now trembling with restrained rage. Cassian doesn’t know if it’s because he’s refusing to give her a choice or if she just really doesn’t like doctors. Either way, it doesn’t change how Nesta ran out of bed at four this morning to puke her soup up. If it wasn’t for all this snow, he would have dragged her ass to the ER by now.

“I don’t have health insurance,” Nesta admits when she sees that Cassian won’t back down. “And I’ve made it this far without any cause for concern; there’s no reason to go.”

“Then I’ll pay for it,” he says simply. Her lack of care for her health astounds and angers Cassian at the same time. How is it that nobody, not even her family, has looked at this woman before and said You’re not okay, do you need help? How many times has she cried in pain with no one to listen?

Nesta has now stood up and is turning red in the face. “Absolutely not. Stop it.”

“Stop what?” Cassian smirks and straightens up.

“I’m not going to the doctor,” she barks. “Cancel the appointment.”

“No.”

“DO IT!”

In that moment, Cassian sees it. He sees how beneath the adult manner and adult words, the carefully crafted facade of cool, there is an explosive, tantrum-prone child. And he’s about to reveal her for good.

“It’s this Wednesday. I hope you don't mind skipping class.”

An enraged shriek shatters the air in the room, and before Cassian can even be shocked Nesta is verbally pouncing on him, yelling, “How fucking dare you, you complete shithead—”

“Nesta.”

“You have no right to— You’re so useless, this is why I didn't want to stay with you, this is why I never talked to you—”

“Nest—”

“You egomaniacal manipulative bastard— just because you let me stay in your house doesn’t mean you can tell me what to do—”

“Damn it Nesta, can you just shut up and LISTEN TO ME FOR ONCE!”

Nesta freezes and blinks, taken aback. Cassian immediately snaps his mouth shut, wondering if he’s finally crossed that line he’s been so cautiously toeing this whole time.

He watches her face closely, looking for signs of upset— or worse, fear. She only says, “Fine.”

He’s confused. “Fine, what?”

“Fine, I’ll go to the doctor’s.” Just like that, her fight is gone and the facade is back in place. She sets her jaw, but a hint of surprise and newfound discovery lingers in her eyes. “But I’m not letting you pay for it. It’ll have to come out of my own pocket.” She doesn't look happy about that part.

Cassian wants to argue her, but he knows how to pick and choose his battles. For now, he’s just baffled that he demanded Nesta to do something, and she listened.

He raised his voice at her. God, he yelled at her in anger and she only blinked in response, and now she’s listening to him. What kind of sick alien shit is this?

***

a/n: i love talking about these characters so if you ever get sick of waiting for part 5 just shoot me an ask and ill gladly discuss nessian with you

tagging: @ladywitchling @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla @sensitiveillyrian @superspiritfestival @aliveahaahahafuck @cupcakey00 @sayosdreams @rainbowcheetah512 @claralady @thebluemartini @nessiantho @missing-merlin @duskandstarlight @lucy617 @sleeping-and-books @everything-that-i-love @awesomelena555 @julemmaes @wickedqueenoffantasy @poisonous-bloom @observationanxioustheorist @gisellefigue08 @courtofjurdan @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @wolfiixxx

#a favor #nesta archeron #cassian #nessian #ncssianwrites #nessian fic #nessian au

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bl--ankhaeji · 4 years

Text

Lucky One (Donghyuck)

Pairing ~ Donghyuck x Reader

Genre ~ Fluffyyyy

Warning ~ I really dont have anything to warn about. Except for that I wrote this one in an hour again so there may be misspelled anything(literally just had to correct misspelled words while writing this part)

A/N ~ Another one of my bursts of inspiration again. I was laying in bed and reading something where the reader rubbed lotion on Jaehyun and this came to mind. Also hyuckie baby has been working really hard lately and I’ve been worried about him so I felt he deserved this.

W.Count ~ i’ve been neglecting word count on my past fics and honestly i’m prolly boutta do it on this one...sorry

The steam from the tub rose, creating a thin layer of fog to cover the room. Feeling the condensation start to clump on your face the heat causing you to let out a sigh. The bag of lavender scented bath salt sat on the side of the tub still slightly open from when you poured some over into the water. You had also emptied a packet of powdered bath milk into the steaming element making it turn a thin almost see through white.

The door to the apartment opens and then closes with a soft slam. “Babe, I’m home.” the tired lifeless words fall from Hyuck’s beautiful heart shaped lips.

“In the bathroom!” You yell, taking a step back admiring your work. Rushing to the bedroom you two sleep in you see the weary boy laying face down on the bed, his bag half haphazardly thrown across the room. You crawl next to him laying down in the process facing each other.

“Hey baby. How was your day at the store?” he questioned you.

You owned a music store, selling vinyls and used guitars and other things, but those two are how you met Hyuck. He accompanied Jaehyun one day to buy vinyls to which you later learned was because he promised to buy a meal for the boy and then another time he came with Jeno and Mark looking for guitars that’s when he asked you out and that’s how you two started.

“My day was fine, a little slow though. How was yours beloved?” you smiled at the man across from you, just looking at him brought a smile to your face.

“My day was tiring as usual lately. We have two music shows to prepare for and a weekly idol episode to film for 127. I know this is the life I asked for and I love it. I truly do, it's just sometimes it gets so draining and with both 127 and dream having comebacks back to back I’ve been running around a lot lately.” Seeing the exhaustion in his eyes and hearing the fatigue in his voice you knew that you planned perfectly. You love Donghyuck or as the rest of the world knows him, Haechan, and you love that he is happy doing what he loves, but even you know that this lifestyle can get really tiring that’s why you try to make things as relaxing as possible when he has time.

“Well it looks like you’re just in luck boy. You can thank me now for being the best girlfriend ever. I accept gifts only in the form of 100s thank you.” You say getting up off of the bed, softly slapping his back proceeding to drag him up. “Come on now, get up and look at what I’ve prepared for you baby.”

A giggle leaves his lips as he starts to follow you to the bathroom. Upon entering he is hit with the warm scent of apples. “What is all of this?” He asks with a smile noticeably creeping onto his face.

“This” you start motioning to the still steaming water filled tub and yourself, “Is your personal relaxation spa for tonight. I know you’ve been very busy lately with everything you have going on and I just wanted to make a night where I can cater to you and help you unwind from everything.”

The look he gives you is filled with an insurmountable amount of love. It’s like he can feel himself falling the more he looks at the giddy grin on your face. Walking over to you he cradles your face in his hands and looks you in the eyes before planting a kiss so sweet you can feel your blood sugar rising.

Breaking the kiss he starts to strip, nothing but the sound of his clothes and hitched breath from you is heard. His honey skin glows in the soft lighting of the room, no matter how many times you see him naked it will always surprise you just how beautiful he is.

The sound of the water moving and a low hiss takes you out of your trance. Donghyuck can already feel the tension in his muscles loosening up, washing him in a serene calm. He hears you move behind him, to which he opens his eyes he didn’t even know were closed.

“Tilt your head back for me beloved. I’m about to wash your hair.” And Hyuck’ll be damned if he didn’t immediately let you lather the shampoo on his scalp. He loved whenever you washed his hair, the feeling of you leisurely scratching his scalp whilst also managing to massage it always made his body as limp as a noodle.

Grabbing a bowl you fill it with water and rinse out the shampoo. “Ok I’m-” “Nonono.” Hyuck whines grabbing your wrist preventing you from leaving his head. A laugh leaves your lips and you start back massaging his scalp. “At least wash yourself while I’m doing this, or we’ll be here all night unless you want me to do that too.”

At your off the wet male looks up at you with a cheeky smirk and a face that basically screamed ‘Aye if you want I’m not gonna stop you’ “I would hit you right now, you better be glad this is supposed to be about you.”

Releasing a boisterous laugh he starts to wash his body.

Donghyuck stayed in the bath until the water got cold. You both were just sitting there laughing and talking about random things. Watching him dry off you head to the bedroom where you tell him to follow you after he put on his boxers.

Pulling out the body oils you bought earlier that day you lay them on the bedside table. “What do you have planned now?” He questions looking at you sitting on the bed, waiting for him.

“I told you I’m your personal spa. How can you have a spa day without a massage?”

“My baby just went all out for me didn’t you?” He coos pinching your cheeks moving to lay on the bed. “I feel sorta bad I’m supposed to take care of you like this-”

“Na-ah don’t come up in here with those gender standards mister. There is no what you’re ‘supposed to do’ we take care of each other, we love each other and dammit if I wanna take care of my baby boy and reward him for working so hard then I will.”

Sitting on his booty you feel him clench his butt cheeks causing you to move faintly. A giggle falls from your lips smacking his back telling him to stop. The oil runs from the bottle onto his skin, layering the tissue in a thin layer of the shiny gloss. You work your hands, gently yet firmly pressing into the knots littering underneath.

Pressing into his back you hear a groan leave his lips. “Fuckkkk that hurts but feels so good.” With a pleased smirk set upon your lips you gather more oil in your hands rubbing them together and then massaging it into his upper back. Near his shoulder blade you feel a pretty big knot.

“Damn, this one might hurt. Im sorry.” You start slowly working away the almost physical form of stress. A high pitched whine leaves his lips as you really start to dig into the knot. Feeling it give way finally clearing it up entirely, you sit back on his thighs, a relieved sigh leaving Hyuck’s moistened lips. “Thank you, I’ve actually been hurting a little in that shoulder and it feels a lot better baby.

Putting more oil along his back you start to move lower. The dimples above his butt indenting, you spot the cute mole on his left butt cheek fighting the urge to poke it, you move your fingers smoothly across his back.

“Do you want me to massage your legs beloved?”

Asking you to stand up Hyuck starts to put on his shirt,“No baby that’s ok. You’ve done a lot already and I feel so much better. You really are like a persona spa.” He says wrapping his arms around your torso, dragging you to lay on the bed next to him.

“Let me turn on a movie.” you turn on Netflix and pick a random movie because you already know you and Hyuck will be sleeping anytime soon. You feel the beautiful male lay his head on your breasts snuggling up to you as the movie starts.

A few minutes into the movie he tilts his head up looking at you, leaning up he plants a firm passionate kiss on your lips. “I love you baby. Thank you so much for being mine, I’m so lucky to have you.” he says in a hoarse deep voice filled with pre-sleep. “I love you too baby and it’s funny you think that because I swear everyday I’m the lucky one.”

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goth-surana · 3 years

Text

Different Violence: Chapter 3

Main pairing: Anders/Male Hawke

Main Tags: hurt/comfort, whump, aftermath of torture

Chapter 3/3

Summary: They stayed like that for a long time, and Hawke tried not to cry again. He had almost lost this. If those Templars hadn’t been afraid of retribution from the Champion, he would have lost this. Every day, because of who Anders was, he could lose this.

Read on AO3 or below the cut

Hawke woke up the next morning with his head resting on Anders’ chest. He panicked for a moment, realizing that he was leaning on his injuries. But when Hawke pulled away, he was met with the sight of unmarred skin.

Anders was looking down at him, awake but still looking weary.

“You’ve healed,” Hawke said as he sat up.

“My magic came back in the middle of the night. Couldn’t sleep much, so I just took off the bandages. Justice is back too, and he sure had a lot to say. Lots of yelling.”

“Not at you, I hope,” said Hawke. Hawke was on good terms with Justice now, even considered him a friend on the few occasions they talked, but he knew the spirit could be unfairly demanding sometimes.

“No, not at me,” said Anders. “He was upset by what happened. He didn’t really know what was going on, only that I had been subdued and poisoned.”

Hawke ran a hand over one pectoral, remembering all too clearly what that skin had looked like yesterday. It was kind of amazing how it was just… gone. But it was also still there in the tired look on Anders’ face. Even healing couldn’t completely wash away what had happened.

“I’d like a bath, I think,” Anders said with a forced smile. He got up quickly and headed away, followed by Hawke.

Anders pulled one of Hawke’s house robes around himself as he waited for the tub to fill. Hawke was sometimes still in awe of the advanced plumbing living in hightown afforded him.

After the tub was filled, Anders took a seat on a stool and stuck his hands in the lukewarm water, casting a heating spell.

This was all so normal, Hawke couldn’t help but think. This could have just been another lazy morning.

But it wasn’t. Why was Anders acting like it was? But what else could they do? How could they even begin to address the nightmare of the past two days?

“Join me?” Anders asked after the water was hot. Hawke nodded and undressed, and slipped into the warm water behind Anders.

Anders let out a contented sigh and slid down until only his head and the top of his shoulders weren’t submerged, leaning back against Hawke. Hawke brought his arms around his lover in an embrace, once again feeling the healed skin. Skin he knew had been cut and bleeding mere hours before.

Hawke pulled Anders even closer instinctively, stroked a hand down his arm under the water.

They stayed like that for a long time, and Hawke tried not to cry again. He had almost lost this. If those Templars hadn’t been afraid of retribution from the Champion, he would have lost this. Every day, because of who Anders was, he could lose this.

Hawke could manage to forget that sometimes, when things went right for long enough. Events like the past days shattered that illusion. This was so fragile it hurt.

Before the water got cold Hawke offered to wash Anders’ back and hair, just wanting to touch him more and feel that he was okay. As he ran the washcloth over his skin he kept imagining the blood, the damage. Hawke’s hand glided over a shoulder where a particularly nasty gash had once been.

That was over now.

Anders sat still while Hawke worked shampoo into his hair, massaging his scalp. His shoulders were relaxed at first, until Hawke accidentally caught his hand on a knot and pulled his head a bit too hard.

Hawke felt Anders flinch away and he dropped his hands immediately.

Anders hunched in on himself, took a long breath. Hawke couldn’t see his face, but his body language told enough.

“Love?” Hawke asked, wanting to reach out and touch but knowing that was a bad idea.

“S-sorry,” Anders muttered. “That just… reminded me. They, uh, pulled my hair near the beginning.”

Another new detail. Suddenly the warm bath felt stifling, the heat almost nauseating.

“Continue?” Anders asked, turning to face Hawke with a tired smile. He was trying to brush it off, and Hawke wouldn’t let him.

“Not if that could make you think of that night.”

“Please, Hawke,” Anders asked, pleaded almost. He scooted back and turned in Hawke’s lap, a hand gripping his thigh.

“I need this. I need this to be normal. Just… it felt nice, you washing my hair. I don’t want to have to change what I do because of what happened.”

Hawke considered the man in front of him, could see the stress written across his tired face. Anders was exhausted, clearly in need of the comfort and touch of another.

Hawke would never deny him that, so he nodded in agreement. But even as Hawke continued to lather the shampoo and pause to stroke his lover’s shoulders, he couldn’t help but think Anders would not get his wish. It wouldn’t be normal, and wouldn’t be for a while.

Hawke hoped to the Maker that Anders was right and that he could just let what happened to him slide off like water. Hawke hoped Hawke was wrong.

—————————

Hawke was right. Unfortunately. The next incident happened a few weeks later when Anders had long since returned to his clinic and adventuring with Hawke.

Hawke, Isabela, Anders and Fenris were walking through Hightown on the way to a meeting with a noble contact.

It had been a pleasant walk until the clattering of armor echoed through the streets. Before any of them could react, a whole group of Templars rudely shoved them all to the side as they headed out.

“Bastards!” Isabela called after them, signing something vulgar.

Hawke was about to agree with her, when he saw Anders start walking towards a nearby alley. His footsteps were weak, and before Hawke could get to him he collapsed to his knees.

“Love?” Hawke asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. He was trembling, he was breathing too fast.

“Anders,” Hawke said, sliding into his field of vision. Anders looked up at him with wide eyes, then crumbled within himself and clutched his hands to his chest.

“Fuck,” he muttered weakly. “I’m- im fine. I just… can’t seem to… to breathe right.”

Hawke waited by Anders’ side until his breathing evened out. The other two didn’t say a word, and neither did Anders all the way to the meeting.

Hawke could tell Anders was still upset when they walked home. His face was sullen, embarrassed.

The two men entered the living room and Hawke gestured for Anders to sit on the couch with him. He did, but looked even more nervous.

“You’re going to ask about what happened today,” Anders said plainly, an air of resigned finality to his voice.

“…well, yes. But I know what happened. I just need you to know that I’ll be here if you want to talk about it.”

“That obvious, then?” Anders asked sardonically. He fiddled with his hands in his lap, looking anywhere but at Hawke. “The others didn’t just think Justice was losing it even more?”

“That’s not what you look like when Justice takes over,” Hawke told him gently. “And do you really wish they had thought that?”

“It’s better than them seeing me being… being afraid of Templars!” Anders said this with an air of incredulity, a deep frustration evident.

Hawke honestly didn’t know how Anders hadn’t been afraid of Templars before. And he also knew this wasn’t normal, rational fear anyway.

“I know you’re not afraid of them,” Hawke said, placing a hand on Anders’ hands clasped together in his lap.

“But… but I was,” Anders whispered harshly. He was trying not to cry. Hawke wished he felt free to feel emotions around him, even unpleasant ones.

“I was…in that moment I was afraid. It was the sound of their armor, the feeling of it against me. I don’t even know what came over me. It was like…” Anders took a deep breath. “I was like back in the Deep Roads.”

Hawke remembered that all too well, the pure panic Anders had gone through when Bartrand slammed the doors on them and left them for dead.

Hawke knew the man didn’t handle the dark well, nor enclosed spaces. Hawke hated that he had lived in Darktown for so long, and had relished being able to move him into his spacious manor.

“It was like when you’re anxious about the dark,” Hawke told him. “That’s okay, and this is okay.”

“It is not! I need to be fighting the Templars, I can’t run from them! I can’t just stop functioning when one appears.”

Anders looked bloody miserable, his head hung low and his eyes reddening.

There was a deep coiled anger directed at himself that had the man snared.

Hawke pulled Anders against him, into his lap, and just held on. Anders went willingly, rested his head in the crook of Hawke’s neck. Small breaths ghosted against his skin, and Hawke soothed an arm up and down Anders’ back.

“It’ll be okay,” Hawke told him. “You likely won’t have this reaction forever. You know how I used to freeze on the battlefield when an ogre showed up?”

He felt Anders nod.

“I don’t anymore, but it took me some time to not just go right back to when Carver died. It’s not rational, it’s just our minds. Think of it like a wound. No one is any lesser for having a wound.”

Anders sighed. “Wounds, I can heal.”

“You’ll heal this too,” Hawke assured him. “Not as fast as you’re used to, for sure, but it will heal nonetheless. Give yourself time, love.”

It had only been two weeks. If Hawke had his way, Anders would still be staying in the manor all day and doing less dangerous things. Hawke didn’t give a damn that the physical wounds had healed, he knew no one could just brush off what happened and he had been right.

Hawke could see the toll that night had taken on Anders, even if Anders refused to admit it. Even in the next few weeks he was jumpier than normal, stayed even farther away from Templars.

As Hawke had said before, he no longer took Anders to meetings with Meredith. Hawke’s temper became even shorter with the woman, he could barely see her self-righteous face without wondering if she knew about what happened to Anders and if she approved.

Unfortunately, that last question was answered in one such meeting.

Hawke had taken Fenris, Varric, and Isabela with him. This was usually who he brought because Aveline was always busy and Merrill was too at risk. At risk of what, Hawke didn’t quite know, but that night had shaken the confidence he had in the protection his own status awarded his companions.

Meredith gave Hawke a thinly veiled order to investigate some more runaway mages suspected of blood magic, and Hawke accepted.

“And even if they are not blood mages,” Meredith finished with, “they are still apostates and you will bring them back this time.”

Hawke had a bit of a habit of only bringing to justice mages who were hurting people, often with blood magic. Meredith needed Hawke to appear on her side so the nobles didn’t get any funny ideas about how much Hawke despised her.

“What’s it to you, then?” Hawke asked, feeling his worsening temper getting the best of him. “You don’t send me out to actually catch these people, you do it to show you have me under your thumb.”

“And it may cease to work,” Meredith sneered, “with how you flaunt the company you keep. You ought to really keep them in check. You know well that their protection only extends to their lives.”

Hawke saw red. He stood up from his chair and slammed his hands on Meredith’s desk, startling his companions but not the woman herself.

“You knew!” Hawke accused her.

“After the fact, but yes,” Meredith said with a raised eyebrow.

“Keep your pet on a leash or we will have to muzzle him for you again.”

Hawke raised a fist but was dragged away by Fenris and Isabela. Meredith only smiled.

“Your other friends are wiser. Heed my words Hawke, you bring me those apostates or I won’t stop my men from making a repeat performance. They are very creative, as you saw.”

Hawke’s head was filled with pure rage all the way back to his mansion. He should have known she would approve. Meredith knew if the Templars killed Hawke’s lover that he would refuse to cooperate, but also knew that concern for Anders’ safety would also force that cooperation. Anders was a pawn in her game to control the city, and now she had been handed a way to keep Hawke in check without risking blowing the whole agreement away.

Beaten, tortured, but still alive. Hurt, but still there to threaten to hurt worse. Best of both worlds for their sick minds.

————————

Hawke couldn’t stand the sight of Templars. He had hated them before, but now “hate” was too soft a word.

“Worry” was also too soft a word for how he felt about Anders these days. Meredith’s threats still rang in his ears, and Anders still did missions for the underground.

He still helped even as his breath hitched at the sight of Templars. He was fine now, he insisted. The situation for mages was only growing more dire, he could not abandon his cause.

And lately Anders wasn’t even telling him when he went on these missions. One day Hawke had begged him to stop, told him of Meredith’s words. Anders had only responded that Hawke should stay away then, so Meredith didn’t see his involvement.

“I won’t get caught again,” Anders told Hawke. Hawke found that hard to believe, and every night Anders returned late his heart pounded with worry.

It was even more concerning, then, that one day Anders did ask for his help.

He told Hawke of one Templar’s plan to turn every mage tranquil, and proof was needed to convince anyone in power to stop it before it was already over.

“Why are you asking me for help now?” Hawke couldn’t help but ask.

Anders looked guilty, knowing how much Hawke had wanted to help in the past.

“This is too important for me to mess up, I need backup for this. We’ll need to use the tunnels to access the lowest level of the Gallows, which is where they often keep documents.”

Hawke agreed to help, even roped Isabela and Varric into the plan. If Anders was going on this dangerous mission, Hawke would bring more than just himself for protection. He also knew that if Anders got in trouble, he would move the earth to make sure he wasn’t left alone with the Templars again.

———————————

The mission was… not exactly a success. Justice had completely lost control, almost killing a young girl.

When Anders returned to himself, he ran before Hawke could say anything.

Hawke was slightly too late to respond, and lost track of Anders in the tunnels. The other man knew them better than Hawke.

Isabela and Varric offered to stay behind and look for any proof, which Hawke barely had time to be grateful for because all he could think about was finding Anders.

He went to the clinic first, then the mansion. Not there. Hawke’s heart was racing, he was wracking his mind for locations Anders might find refuge.

Eventually he gave up, his head pounding with worry and his knees about to give out. He had no idea where Anders was. He could be anywhere, anyone could have caught him, the Templars could have caught him and-

The door to the cellar creaked slightly. Hawke bolted to the kitchen, and standing there was Anders.

The man looked listless, lifeless almost but Hawke barely noticed because he was too busy throwing his arms around the man.

Hawke buried his face in the crook of Anders neck and clung tighter, eliciting no reaction. Anders wasn’t even hugging back, just standing there.

“Thank the fucking Maker,” Hawke breathed out. After a few more moments he stepped back, keeping his hands loosely on Anders’ arms. Anders was just staring at him, pale.

“I…” he croaked out, “I only came back to get my pillow. I’m - I’m leaving.”

“What?” Hawke asked, truly dumbfounded.

“I c-can’t stay here Hawke,” Anders told him, a slight tremble in his voice. Otherwise he sounded blank, tranquil almost. Hawke shivered, trying not to think on that too much.

“I almost killed that girl. I’m a monster, and I need to leave where I can’t hurt anybody else.”

The words sounded rehearsed, like he had told himself this a million times.

“You’re not a monster, Anders,” Hawke told him. “You came back in the end, the girl is fine and thanks to you she is free!”

“Only because of you,” said Anders, still shaking but lacking any inflection. His eyes were blotchy like he had been crying, but that was over now and all that was left was emptiness.

“Come here,” Hawke said as he led Anders away gently. The man followed listlessly.

Hawke sat them both down on a couch in the living room, then reached up to brush a strand of hair from Anders’ face. He cupped his cheek, and gave the man a warm smile.

Anders just stared, then looked away.

“I still need to leave,” he said quietly. “You can’t make me stay… you wouldn’t.”

Hawke’s heart sank. “You’re right, I would never make you do anything. But please don’t go.”

It was all Hawke could think to say. Anders was silent for a long while, and the only noise in the room was the crackling of the fireplace. The light danced over Anders’ skin, caught his blonde hair. Even in his misery he looked ethereal.

“You’re spiraling,” Hawke told him gently. “You do this sometimes, remember? It won’t be as bad tomorrow.”

“It will,” replied Anders. “I still will have lost control of Justice. I thought I could keep him at bay, but… he couldn’t stand seeing Alrik again. I could barely- I thought I could handle s-seeing Alrik again…”

Anders was trembling harder, trying to fight back his emotions. Trying to fight back the very reaction Hawke had seen too many times since that night.

Hawke’s stomach dropped, and a chill went throughout his entire body.

“You-“ Hawke started, then had to stop. “You said you just had a “run in” with Alrik.”

This couldn’t be. Hawke hadn’t just walked Anders into a fight with-

Anders would have told him that-

Anders shook his head. “I didn’t want you to worry,” he said numbly. “The mission was too important, I had to try. I thought I could handle it.”

Hawke reached forward and pulled Anders into his arms, resting the man’s head on his shoulder and taking a deep breath.

It had been him. That man in the tunnels had tortured Anders. Hawke had come face to face with the man responsible and he hadn’t even known it.

At least he had the image of Justice ripping the man’s head from his body. At least Alrik died a gruesome death for what he did. For what he did to a lot of mages, it turned out.

“Let’s go to bed,” Hawke said. “You and I both need sleep.”

“I have to leave,” Anders said again, as numb as the first time.

“No you don’t. Not tonight. Tomorrow you can decide, but… please just stay for tonight.”

Anders nodded into Hawke’s shoulder. Hawke breathed a sigh of relief. He didn’t even want to entertain the idea that he could not convince Anders to stay.

Even if Anders left, he would go with him. With Carver dead, his mother dead, Bethany with the Gray Wardens… Kirkwall wasn’t his home so much as Anders was his home.

Hawke helped Anders undress and gently guided him to bed. He was in bad shape, even if physically fine.

Hawke wished Anders would have told him who Alrik was, it hurt that Anders didn’t. But wasn’t he right? Hawke would have worried.

Hawke had trouble sleeping that night, but Anders slept almost instantly. He was draped over Hawke’s chest, breathing deeply. This was more sound than Hawke had seen Anders sleep in a long time, and it must be because of how the day had drained him.

Would Hawke really be leaving tomorrow, or would he be able to convince Anders to stay? Another reason he wasn’t sleeping was the fear that he would wake and Anders would just be gone.

But despite that fear, the events of the day got to Hawke too and he drifted to sleep.

——————————

Anders wasn’t in the bed when Hawke woke up, and so Hawke started the day in a blind panic. He scrambled to put his clothes on, ran down the stairs.

Anders was standing in the hallway, wearing one of Hawke’s robes. Thank the Maker, he wasn’t dressed to leave.

“Anders,” Hawke said. “You scared me.”

“Oh,” Anders replied as his face fell. “I’m sorry… I wasn’t really thinking. I’m, um, I’m not going to leave.”

A huge weight lifted itself off of Hawke’s heart.

“Good,” Hawke said earnestly. “If you did leave you know I’d follow.”

“I do know, now that I’m thinking straight.”

It was good he knew last night he hadn’t been in his right mind. He had been confronted by his tormentor and lost control.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about Alrik. I know now that was a terrible idea.”

“It’s okay,” Hawke said, taking Anders’ hand in his. “I know why you didn’t tell me. I get what you were thinking.”

There was a small silence before Anders spoke.

“I don’t know what I’m going to do now, now that I can’t control Justice. I don’t know if I can even go out to help you. I’m a liability now.”

“Last night wasn’t normal. It’s not every day that you’ll see someone who… someone who would provoke that kind of reaction.”

“I hope you’re right,” Anders sighed. “And I’m sorry. I’m sorry for trying to lock you out. Clearly that wasn’t a good idea.”

Hawke waited for Anders to continue, knowing the man wanted to say more.

“And I’m sorry to… well, myself and you that I keep refusing to admit… to admit…”

Anders took a deep breath. His next words were spoken with a thick voice.

“To admit that I’m not okay. That I haven’t been okay since that night. That I’m still healing.”

Hawke could almost cry tears of joy at those words. Sure Hawke could tell the man this every day, but that didn’t mean as much as him saying it himself.

“Take all the time that you need,” Hawke told him.

“….I wish it didn’t hurt like this. I wish I could just get over it. I wish I could just get over every fucked up thing that’s ever happened to me.” Tears slid down his cheeks as he spoke, but he didn’t seem like he was caving in with the effort of being okay. He looked freer than he had been in months.

“Pushing it down won’t do any good,” he continued. “I think Justice made me realize that. I’m not going to be able to control him until I admit I’m struggling.”

Hawke wrapped his arms around Anders and gave him a gentle squeeze.

“I’ll always be here to help you,” Hawke said. “You don’t have to be okay.”

“Thank you, love.”

Anders lowered his head to Hawke’s shoulder to cry, but they were tears of release. Tears that healed.

Hawke held Anders while he cried, rocked them slowly back and forth while Anders let out the pain of the paths months.

After a while Anders looked up at Hawke and smiled. Tears still glistened in his eyes, but he looked hopeful.

Hawke felt lighter, knowing that the real healing could finally begin.

#handers #m!handers #anders/male hawke #anders/hawke

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haro-whumps · 4 years

Text

Box Boy Plurality: Reliable

CW: villain monologue, referenced dub/noncon, slavery, gag use, dehumanization, degradation, brainwashing, creepy + intimate whumper

Tag List: @thatsthewhump @whump-it @ashintheairlikesnow @fairybean101 @finder-of-rings @comfortforthepain @shameless-whumper @that-one-thespian @burtlederp @castielamigos-whump-side-blog @raigash @im-not-rare-im-rarr @spiffythespook @whumps-the-word @frnkieroismydaddy @whumpity--whump--whump @michelleswhumpyreblogs @jo-castle @newandfiguringitout @lumpofwhump @infested-with-bloodv2

Masterlist

02’s knees hurt very, very badly, but his back hurt worse. The dining room floor was unforgiving against the bruising on his knees, and having to hold still, muscles in his back taut despite how much they ached, served as a reminder to 02 of what his new owner had done. Had just finished doing, even though they were now acting like nothing had even happened. They sat at the table, the other pet, Soren, cozied up to their side, claiming most of their attention, the two of them eating something that smelled so good it made 02’s stomach burn and twist and cramp. He was, reluctantly, grateful, to Soren.

He’d saved him. He was continuing to save him, by draping himself so artfully over their shared owner, by feeding them careful bites and shifting attractively, every so often, just often enough to keep himself interesting.

02’s back was grateful, even if his brain had a hard time getting there. He was--still pissed. The pain didn’t help with the anger, any. The guilt didn’t temper the anger, either, knowing that he’d needed rescued, that he’d forced Soren into a position where he had to service their master like some television whore.

Fuck. Fuck! He hated this. Hated the pain. Hated how the floor kept going in and out of focus, his earlier exhaustion laughable compared to this. Hated knowing that the moment Soren stopped being captivating and pretty and sweet, their owner would turn back on 02 and the pain would start again. What would they do to him? Starvation seemed on the menu (ha), they were in a good position to just lift up their foot and stomp down on 02’s aching back, or maybe they’d just kick him in the side while they got up. They had some sort of fucking god complex, it could be that they wanted him to know just how far below them he was.

Exalted (and what the fuck? The arrogance!) murmured something into Soren’s ear, and Soren got up. 02 twitched, knowing that whatever was about to happen, it would start (resume) now, and he wouldn’t be able to stop it. And Soren cocksucking wouldn’t work twice. He felt his breath picking up.

“There, 02, see?” Exalted purred oh so fucking smugly from where they sat. “You kept your ugly little mouth shut, and you waited until Soren was done just like you’d been told, and now you get rewarded for your troubles. See how much nicer things are when you obey?” Their tone was saccharine, syrup-sweet, and 02’s teeth grit. Yeah right.

Except Soren set a plate down in front of 02, and he immediately began drooling, sealing his lips shut and swallowing hard. A trick? 02 glanced at his new owner (it made him woozy), waiting for the punchline.

Exalted grinned. “You behave so well for someone with such a bad attitude. Good boy, 02, you may eat now.”

02 lifted his shaking hand and Exalted tutted at him, making him flinch. “Did I say you could use your hands?”

Right. Right. Well, okay, not the worst thing he’d ever been forced to do; and this food was much more enticing. He bent down further (ouch) and bit into it like a dog with its foodbowl. He hated it. But it tasted so good, and he was hungry, and he needed the energy, and 02 didn’t know when his next meal would be. Mike hadn’t fed him much, but there was a routine, and he could carry on knowing Mike would simply beat him when he felt like it, nothing else. But Exalted, 02 gathered, was significantly more methodical. Much more like the Processors at the training facility. And with the Processors, the pain had never stopped.

His chin and nose and cheeks were messy, no precision when he ate like this. He could hear Exalted murmuring to Soren, and his returning, hesitant, “Yes Exalted”s and “I understand, Exalted”s. Was 02 just an example for Soren? A “Don’t act up or I’ll treat you like shit, too” before he started getting too out of line?

02 licked the plate clean, then ran his tongue along his mouth, chin, nose, everywhere he could stretch his tongue to reach. He lifted himself back up slowly, knees hurting, wondering what he should say, and if he even gave a fuck about what he should say. Probably something humiliating and grovelling like ‘thank you’ or some shit. Gee willickers Exalted, thanks for feeding me! Thanks for showing off the fact that you control every aspect of my life and not being a total and complete demon about it!

The hand in his hair made him flinch, his back searing with the spasm, moisture in the back of his throat getting sucked down the wrong way and choking him before he coughed. The pain came now, right?

“Easy, boy,” Exalted murmured, toying with 02’s hair as he tried to get his lungs working again. “So jumpy.”

“I wonder fucking why!” 02 shouted, and was immediately struck backside the head for his words. Dizzily, he swayed down close to the floor, back protesting the movement, knees stinging at the shifting pressure.

“Such a filthy mouth. But then again, you’re a filthy person.” Exalted stood up, Soren with them, and 02 bit down angry, frightened tears, his fatigue and the pain leaving him vulnerable to the traitorous habits of his own body. “We’ll need to fix all of that, and fortunately one of those will be remedied quicker than the other. Back down to the basement, come pet.”

02 tried to stand. He genuinely did. He made three attempts before Exalted simply ordered, “Crawl.”

It was humiliating. It was painful. 02 couldn’t tell if it was supposed to be a mercy or not, and he hated that. He scooted down the stairs butt first like a goddamn toddler, embarrassed and exhausted, and bit back relieved tears when he finally got to the basement bathroom and saw thin wafts of steam coming from the shower Exalted had turned on. Not burning, not freezing.

“Soap and shampoo thoroughly,” Exalted ordered, Soren pressed up to their side with their arm around his waist, looking like a doll, an angel, some sort of forest deity all dressed in draping cream and white and gold. Worried. Pitying. “More than once, if you need to.”

02 bit down hard enough his teeth ground together. ‘Yes Exalted’ was the right answer, but he really wanted to tell them to fuck off again.

But he was so tired.

Ultimately, they didn’t wait for a response, simply strode past him with Soren trailing after them, sending 02 a final, nervous glance before shutting the door behind him.

The warm water felt so good. So stupidly, mercifully good. The Processors hadn’t let him have this; a gift for pets that kept their mouths shut. Mike hadn’t cared, but if 02 took too long he’d be punished for wasting hot water.

Exalted was wealthy, with a water heater the size of a tank in their utility room, and had specifically told 02 to wash twice.

He almost fell asleep, lying in the tub, warm water seeping into his skin and aching joints, dirt and blood sifting down, over, past him and into the drain. He let the spray lull him until he finally felt strong enough to stand, albeit on shaking legs, and he set to actually cleaning himself.

He guessed the fact that he’d been given hair-growth shampoo and conditioner made sense, given Soren and Exalted’s hair. Still weird though. He wondered, as he worked it to a lather, if he’d be able to read things much, now. Mike had let him. Made him, really, doing that stupid fucking job for him. Would Exalted care?

He’d keep his mouth shut about it until Exalted brought it up. And if Exalted didn’t bring it up, it was their own damn fault if they didn’t want him to. He’d read as much as he fucking wanted.

He didn’t know how much later it was when he finally felt, really and truly, all the way clean. He also didn’t give a rat’s ass. He was warm and clean and it felt nice, and everything out that door was going to be painful. He took his time drying off, and when he limped out the door he stumbled backwards, then down onto his ass. Exalted was right there, walking towards him with terrifying timing.

“Come on then, mutt,” Exalted said, staring down their nose, and there was Soren, right on their heels. “Put these on,” they said, tossing a pair of dark orange sweatpants at him. “Into your box.”

Soren watched Ren lock 02’s box anxiously. He’d never seen this side of Ren before. He honestly hadn’t believed they could be like this. When they turned back to him he stared up at their eyes anxiously, one hand on his collar and the other on his wrist.

“Easy, pet,” Ren shushed, caressing his cheek. He leaned into it, needing their comfort so badly. Everything with 02 was scary and new and unfamiliar but he knew this, knew the gentle touch of their palm and the way they soothed him down from his worries. “Just the bed for you. I won’t put you in a box, you’re not bad for me, easy Soren, you’re fine.”

Soren bit his lip.

“Oh, pet, what is it? What do you want to say?”

“Just, um. At my facility,” Soren started softly, eyes down, “they kennel trained us. It--It wouldn’t be a punishment for me, Exalted. I, like my box. It’s comforting.”

Ren was quiet a moment, and Soren risked a glance up. They seemed surprised. Then they smiled, and kissed Soren, and he kissed back because he needed this touch.

“What a good boy you are,” Ren praised, warming Soren. “Such a good boy for telling me. I had no idea you liked your box.”

“I, I like the bed too, Exalted,” Soren said eagerly. “I just, it wouldn’t be a punishment for me, I guess it would kind of be like a rare treat?” Soren hoped he was making sense.

“I understand.” Soren relaxed. “You’re so good for saying so. Would you like to sleep in it tonight? Maybe keep 02 company?”

Soren bit his lip and nodded. That sounded wonderful. A chance to talk, and the familiar safety of his box while everything else was being chaotic and confusing and scary. He let Ren lead him over and helped them move 02’s box to the ground, wincing a little when he heard 02 squeak, and then climbed into his own box, feeling his body settle the moment he laid down.

“Goodnight, my precious bird,” Ren said, muffled through the wood, and Soren smiled into the pitch blackness.

“Sleep well, Honored One.”

It wasn’t long after Ren left that 02 spoke. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Oh, I wasn’t lying. I really was kennel trained,” Soren assured, subtly shifting and feeling the close walls of his box, taking comfort in how little he could move. It was like being in a blanket burrito, only sorta better and very dark. “But we don’t have to talk; I know you’re tired.”

“I meant--everything. The cocksucking and for during dinner. Thank you, I guess, you didn’t have to, and I, fuck, appreciate it?”

Soren frowned, trying to think of what happened during dinner. Mostly he’d just desperately tried to ignore 02 and act like everything was normal, which had worked until they finished eating, and then he had to go get a plate for 02 and Ren had ignored him in favor of staring at 02, which they’d never done before! He touched his collar, reminding himself that this jealousy was absurd and dumb. Not to mention, Ren was being very harsh on 02, so Soren didn’t even have anything to be jealous of! More than anything, he should be worried about 02 (and he was, oh he was.)

“You’re welcome,” he said softly.

“Must be hard,” 02 said, “having a fucking freakshow like that for an owner.”

Soren felt rage flare up, replacing his confusion and anxiety. “Don’t call them that!” he snapped. “Ren is wonderful and treats me very well; you’re just a loudmouth!” That was--mean. That was rude, and Soren shouldn’t have said that. “You’ll see,” he tacked on, quieter, guilty, “they’re very kind. They’ll be kind to you, too, once you stop trying to fight them.”

“Shit, you actually believe that.”

Soren sighed and rolled onto his side, away from 02. “Of course I do. This is the first time I’ve ever seen them hurt anyone.” Soren hugged his arms and let the smothering blackness comfort him. “You’ll see. They’re reliable; soon enough you’ll believe them too.”

“I doubt it,” 02 said, quieter as well, now. “But thanks.”

Soren fell asleep with surprising ease. Given everything.

Ren listened to their pets talk, and spent a mild moment attempting to determine if Soren fell asleep first or not. Unable to see either of them, it was a coin toss, and no need to imagine up reasons to punish their new plaything when there would be plenty of real, solid reasons to do so, soon.

They pulled Soren from his box in the morning and kissed him, slow and sweet and much longer than they normally would. “Go shower and change, pet. You smell like old newspaper.”

Soren giggled with a “yes Exalted” before he rushed off, only glancing back once with a worried lip and look as Ren flipped the hatch on 02’s box. They helped him onto his feet, admiring the bruises they’d left, and turned his head this way and that, titillated by the glower he gave them.

“Since Soren is busy and I need to get dressed for the day, why don’t you go make breakfast for us, mm mutt?”

They watched his internal struggle, the little gears of his maggot brain churning slowly, but only briefly this time. Turned out he wasn’t interested in getting a repeat of last night this early in the morning. Ren went back up to their room, getting dressed and doing their hair and makeup just so before popping by Soren’s room and helping him with his jewelry. They entered the kitchen together, and 02 looked at Ren apprehensively.

They ate, they phoned their work to let them know that they’d be taking the day off, they let Soren feed 02, and then they took both their pets into the living room and pulled out one of the two nifty little tools they’d stowed in their skirt pocket, but kept it hidden in their palm just yet.

“Now, 02,” Ren started, seated on the couch with Soren leaning preciously against their side, 02 kneeling at their feet, “I’m going to teach you a lesson; it is up to you whether you would like help being good during this lesson.” Ren stretched the gag between their hands, like they were presenting him with a fine necklace and balancing it on their fingers for maximum appeal.

He was familiar with this tool. He very, very evidently hated it. His glare was nothing shy of delectable, and oh, they’d drool if it wasn’t unseemly. They let the moment drag out, staring with a faintly pleasant expression at the storming boy, Soren a warmth at their side. 02 said nothing, did nothing, but if he was playing the waiting game, his knees would ache long before Ren got bored.

Slowly, with clear evidence that it caused an immense blow to his stubborn pride, loathing radiating from him like a fire on a cold night, 02 lifted up on his knees, leaned forward, opened his mouth, and bit down on the center of the gag.

“Good boy,” Ren praised immediately, caressing his face as they fastened the straps and delighting in how he couldn’t stop himself from shivering at the kind touch, even as they gagged him. “See? You’re learning already.”

They pushed his shoulder gently and he sank back down onto his knees, and they wrapped an arm around Soren, tucking him into their side sweetly. “Now, 02. You are stubborn and you are vile, but those are only temporary afflictions, and you will be cured of them. I give you a week, maybe a week and a half before I have cleaned you of these deformities,” 02 made an offended noise, but given that he couldn’t talk, Ren kept going, “Maybe two if you’re really stubborn, and I have every intention of detailing to you, right now, exactly how that will happen.

“You see, 02, there are four factors to making a good slave: fear, obedience, stress, and loyalty.

“Fear is generated by pain, yes, but far more than that, fear is generated by inconsistency. A person can go through immense pain, but if that pain is consistent, reliably given, and tracked onto preconceived patterns, that person will adjust. Their mind will adapt, and the fear will simmer to a low boil, regardless of the intensity of pain. But place someone in a situation where nothing is patterned, nothing is sensible, and there is no consistency? They will be afraid no matter the pain or lack thereof. This is why Soren has been so frightened, since your arrival.” They smiled at Soren, nudging his chin up with their forefinger and softening at his nervous returning smile.

“You being here has thrown a wrench in our routine, and I’m behaving differently than he’s seen before. But worry not,” Ren said, their voice going low and soft as they spoke to Soren specifically, petting his hair out of his face, “You’ll adjust soon, my sweet.”

They turned their attention back to 02, who seemed befuddled, angry, frightened, but still attentive. Good. “Fear is what you currently have the most of. You are terrified of me, and it warps itself into anger, which is why you lash out the way you do.” Another noise of protest, but still, Ren didn’t care. “You are in a new environment, I am nothing like anyone or anything you have experienced before, you don’t know what to expect. Soon, you will. You will always have the memories of the pain that I can and will give you, so your fear will never truly disappear, but fear is best kept at a moderate level, middling of the four.

“Obedience is generated by fear and respect. This is why you behave physically, even though you mouth off. You do not respect me yet, because you are used to an owner who does not command respect. You only fear me, fear the Processors that you know you can be sent back to anytime your owner’s dissatisfaction creeps too high.” Both pets tensed at that, and Ren felt a giddy little shiver at it. “Obedience should be kept the highest of the four traits, but through a combination of moderate fear and high respect. It is obedience that lowers pain, causing a decrease in fear and stress, so there’s a positive cycle there.

“You are very obedient, which is good. It’ll keep you conscious long enough to learn how to keep your mouth shut. But over the next week or so, you will incrementally begin to take after Soren, who obeys me because he adores me, first and foremost, with the pain of the Processors a long-distant memory that barely factors anymore.

“Stress is generated by inconsistency, yes, but primarily it is generated by pain. Your body’s threshold can be expanded, but only by so much. People who are stressed make more mistakes, suffer from a higher number of physical afflictions that are more intense than in others, and their bodies do not process food or rest properly, and can directly increase acting out. Stress should be kept lowest of the four, as its presence has no particular benefits but many drawbacks.

“Stress and fear also directly impact each other, which one might assume since they are caused by the same factors. A rise in fear will be inevitably followed by stress, and an increase of stress will naturally be accompanied by heightened fear. However, stress is significantly easier to keep low, since pain only needs to happen with disobedience, but there will always be some inconsistencies in life, due to the fact that a lack of variety is terribly understimulating.

“Loyalty is generated through trust. Trust is generated by consistency and kindness, so we are once again presented with positive cycles. Loyalty should be kept moderately-high, not as important as obedience, but far more important than fear. You are still too new to understand that I am reliable, that I am trustworthy, but it is when I get this fact through your thick little skull that everything will fall into place for you.”

“In the coming days, I will hurt you, but it will be to fix you. I will hurt you when you disobey, every time you disobey, and only when you disobey. You will adjust, adapt, quicker than you believe yourself capable, than your fear currently allows you to believe. You will settle, and with the kindness that comes due to your newfound obedience you will feel your stress lessen and your opinion of me rise, leading to respect, trust, loyalty, and continued obedience.”

Ren gripped 02 by the chin with their free hand, making sure he was paying extra attention to this part. “And every time a change happens inside you, every step forward you make, every ounce of progress, you will remember this lesson, and you will know that I am right.”

They leaned back with satisfaction. “I only want a plaything, 02.” They smiled at him. “This doesn’t have to hurt.”

But it would.

#bbu #whump #box boy #villain monologue #slavery #slave whump #gag use #referenced noncon #dehumanization #brainwashing #creepy whumper #intimate whumper #codependent whumpee #multiple whumpees #ren #soren #02 #mine #writing

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radiorenjun · 4 years

Text

HeartStrikes - Yunho

They say a heart can only take 50 strikes of pain before it completely shattered. A human heart made of glass and porcelain is the only thing that's keeping them from being emotionless, lifeless creatures.

A strike can be a painful thing. On the brink of excruciating pain they say the human heart made of glass sends vibrations in the air ghat caused the people in the same room to hear their aching thoughts from the shattered object.

A human heart could only bare so much pain and if it is not healed in time, there's no telling that the human could last.

----

"Hey Yunho, do you have to go?" you asked with a whiny voice, looking up from your comfortable state on the couch as you clutched your pillow tightly. Yunho looked up at you as he tugged on the collars of his shirt.

He chuckled before you continued, "we haven't been spending much time together since your debut. It'll be nice if you just stay for a couple of hours" you looked up at your boyfriend, eyes glimmering with hope.

You were proud and happy for his success, and you were glad that he was finally able to do something he loved. But sometimes, you feel sad that he had to leave during intimate and cuddle sessions for practice or meetings with his group.

"I'm sorry, babe, it's urgent." he pouted, tugging up his socks. "The boys wanted to do something really cool for the MAMA performance, and I'd promise I'd be there for them since Mingi-hyung came back from his rest" he smiled, walking over to you.

He leaned to give you a soft kiss on your forehead, his hand caressing your head gently. You nuzzled against his touch, causing him to smile widely at you. "But it's been so long since we had a whole day to ourselves" you pouted, as he gave you another kiss, this time on your lips.

"Why are you being clingy these days?" he chuckled. "You know I'm really busy with my comebacks and practice, I really need to try my hardest to please the fans" he said in a teasing tone.

You felt a strong jolt of pain in your chest, as if something inside of you was breaking apart. You clutched the pillow tighter in your grip, keeping a forced smile on your lips as you gazed up at his innocent figure staring down at you.

You assume this was a strike of a human heart. "I guess I am being kinda clingy, huh?" you chuckled, your heart felt like it was being mutilated. "I'll see you later?" you tried your best to give him a toothy smile despite the jolting pain in your chest. With a nod, Yunho waved and left with a bright smile.

As soon as you heard the door close and you reassured he wasn't in the distance where he could hear you. You couldn't helobit your lip as tears glossed over your eyes, the door to your emotions on your chest opened with a loud creak, the glass organ slipping out easily onto the cushions.

There it was, clear as a crystal, lots of cracks and scratches surrounding it. Minute drops of transparent liquid flowing out numerously like a leaking tap. You grabbed it and shoved it inside your chest and tried to keep the door from opening, keeping your sobs quiet at the pain.

You saw a few drops had soaked the sofa cushions, leaving a dark black mark on the soft fabric. You leaned against the pillows, shutting your eyes tight as the television played loudly in your ears. Your hands over the small door on your chest, trying to keep it close.

That was one of a few strikes this past week.

------------------

You grabbed a spoonful of ice cream as you plopped yourself down on the sofa, humming in content at the flavor as your free hand pressed buttons to decide on a movie. You glanced at the clock on the walls as you engulfed another spoon of the sugary cold cream into your mouth.

11:24

Yunho isn't back yet. He didn't notify you if he was coming home late like he usually did, yet again, you knew that his comeback is coming up soon and he's busy with preparing and practice. Yet again, you missed the small moments you'd have with him from time to time.

You hardly remember when was the last time you went out on a date. You sighed, looking down at your ice cream as the movie finally played on the large TV screen. You missed him.

The loud sound of your door opening attracted your attention as your head jerked towards the door. A sweaty Yunho appeared with exhaustion coating his face. "Im home" he muttered as he slipped off his shoes and put them on the rack.

"Welcome home" you greeted with a spoon in your mouth. Yunho walked passed with a small smile, raising his brow at you, "why aren't you asleep yet?" he asked, his hand gripping the saddle of his dufflebag. "I couldn't sleep, so I decided to wait for you with some movies and ice cream," you shoved a spoonful in your mouth with a smile.

He chuckled, "you're eating that again? You're gonna get fat, you know." your smile faltered slightly as your chest sends aching waves down your entire body. Your eyes watered slightly as you bit your lip but you lay your head on the sofa cushions in an angle where he could not see your face.

You fidgeted with the spoon in the ice cream tub with your hand, your other arm wrapping around your legs which were folded into your chest as you tried to keep yourself from screaming in pain. "I know... But I really wanted to treat myself" you tried not to let your voice crack as your chest tightened even more.

You could hear Yunho let out a small laugh, "alright then, you do whatever you want, babe. I'm going to take a shower" he shook his head before jogging up the stairs to the bathroom, leaving your weak form shaking in pain.

You shoved your face against the pillow to muffle your cries as you felt your chest open again. The glass organ popped out of its small space and onto your palm, liquid dripping out of the cracks.

Your eyes widen when you saw that the cracks were larger and more liquid was oozing out of it than last time. You shoved it back in and tried to close the door despite it being a painful thing.

You let out a small sound of pain when you finally got it shut tight, clenching your eyes shut to prevent tears from leaking out as well. "Y/n? You okay?" Yunho's voice reached you from your bedroom, signalling that he was done showering.

"Yeah! This movie is just so painful to watch!" you quickly grabbed the remote and skipped it to the emotional part as you wiped your watery eyes. "You're such a pathetic baby" he laughed as he walked down the stairs with his hands going through his hair with a small towel.

You took a deep breath before continuing to watch the movie, wrapping your arms around yourself to try and keep the door shut and you swore your heart had small dots of black liquid inside the transparent material.

---->

"Oh my God, grow up would you?" Yunho groaned, running his hands through his hair in frustration. "Grow up?" you exclaimed, your eyebrows raised in surprise as the oh-so-familiar jolt of pain rushed through your body.

"Yeah, stop nagging me all the time! I'm old enough to make decisions for myself and not have some woman cling onto my back," another few strikes. You winced silently as Yunho paced back and forth in anger, letting his emotions take control of his words.

"You're just so annoying and clingy sometimes and sometimes I really just can't take it. I mean, what part of 'im busy' do you not understand, huh?" your eyes widened as the door opened and your heart fell to trembling figures of your palm.

It was turning black.

Cracks surrounding the object as if some clear glue was holding it together, it was like staring into a bowl of water with a drop of black food dye added into it. It was slowly coming transparent to black and the excruciating pain was making your chest numb.

"Its exhausting to have someone always clinging to your back at all times and tell you to do this, to do that. I just want some time alone, and you don't get why I always spend time outside of the house."

Your ears rang loudly, muffling your boyfriend's frustrated voice but it was not enough to silence him words. Your chest ached even more with every harsh word he barked as you couldn't tear your gaze away from the object in your palms. It was so mesmerizing to see the black slowly colouring the shattered object, the pain felt so bad but it was so mesmerizing for it to stop.

Your head spun intensely. As your breathing became intense, tears uncontrollably streaming down your face like a leaking tap as your palms shook even more. Your body began to feel numb and you swore you almost lost your balance.

"I don't need someone to baby me 24/7. Y/n, I don't want you to latch on to my back like a sloth and holding me back from what I do best. I don't need you holding me back from my priorities. I don't need you constantly checking up on me." his words got louder and the black completely covered your heart.

"I don't need you."

Your body felt numb as the object in your heart turned from jet black to glowing red. The light illuminated the room with its bright glow as the room was filled with the pathetic sound of your voice.

It hurts. Make it stop.

Yunho paused his little rambling to finally look at you. Before the heart sent echoing waves of your voice across the room, repeating the same sentences. Yunho's heart broke at the sound of your voice.

It sounded broken, it sounded as if you had been crying for hours, begging for salvation. As if you were being tortured or murdered.

It sounded as if you were dying.

Yunho walked towards you hesitantly, making you glance up at him with eyes full of tears, your eyes wasn't filled with life anymore and your face paled. Yunho's face made you frown even more. He looks sad. Did you do that? Did you make him sad?

"Y/N" he couldnt say anything. He didn't know what to say to a girl who was trembling with a broken heart. His name was the only thing you could breathe out before your vision became blurry and you collapsed to the floor.

----

Yunho gasped, quickly catching you in his arms and letting the glass that is your heart fall to the carpet floor. He screamed for your name frantically, his voice shaking as he tried to shake you awake. Your eyes were opened slightly but he couldnt see any life in them.

His voice ached as he continued to scream your name, pleading that you would wake up. Behind him was the glass object fully jet black, shattered but it was still holding shape. Fear rose within him as tears welled up in the poor boy's eyes. He grabbed your wrist and put his fingers on your veins, trying to feel something.

You weren't even breathing.

He got up and grabbed the black object and rushed to his car with your pale, still figure laying lifelessly in his arms. He tried to stable himself as he drove you to the hospital with tears streaming down his face and apologies bursting out of his throat.

You had to be okay. Right?

---->

A human heart could only bare so much pain and if it is not healed in time, there's no telling that the human could last.

It's all up to the victim of the broken heart whether they want to be saved.

---->

You opened your eyes to see that you were in a bright room. Your feet were bare, your fingertips were warm. Your eyes felt as if you had just woken up from a really long nap and for the first time in so long, you felt no pain. You felt okay.

You looked around to find yourself in a hospital room. Right infront of you was... You. You were laying on a bed with monitors surrounding you, you were in a really bad condition. Eye bags surrounding the bottom of your eyes and your skin was pale as snow.

Your eyes darted towards the figure that was sitting beside the bed, clutching your hand tightly with tears endlessly streaming down his face showing regret and pain. He looked familiar.

He was sobbing out apologies as if your sleeping state could hear him. Laying on the table next to him was a heart-like object, it was changing colours. Red to black to transparent to.. Black again.

The voices were muffled and all you could decipher was "I'm sorry, y/n. I'm sorry." Y/n. That name. That was your name! Who was he? You glanced at the sobbing boy, he was clutching your hand tightly with both of his. His eyes red, his nose running and his face was red, possibly from all the crying.

Behind him was a door. A white door with a sign stuck to it, written in bold letters was "LIVING WORLD" in black arial font. You looked behind you to see a long set of ascending stairs leading to a bright glow on the ceiling. With a gate far up in the end. A sign was stuck to the ground near the stairs saying "HEAVEN" in fancy letters.

It seems as you are stuck between life and death. You glanced up at the familiar sobbing boy and you lifeless figure with furrowed brows before glancing at the bright glowing light at the top of the stairs.

What will you pick?

-----------------------------------

I'm sorry this took so damn long, this is so short WTF. Hope you like it, I worked hard on this. Another heart au coming up is San!! Stay tuned!

#ateez yunho #ateez reactions #ateez fluff #ateez angst #ateez x atiny #ateez x you #ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez ff #ateez au

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imakemyownworld · 5 years

Text

Sweet but a psycho (fluff)

Concept: Gray and you went a little overboard with your sub and dom fetish last night. You feel exhausted and your whole body, covered with bruises, aches. Grayson feels very bad and takes care of you in every way possible.

I don’t know where this came from but it could be my favorite thing I wrote. I have a soft spot for guys taking care of their girl - in both ways. :)

Word Count: 1.2k

“I promise babe Im fine, just let me sleep okay?” you’re curled up in his bed under the softest blanket ever. You loved being submissive and Grayson loved being the dominant one, which sometimes led to nights like this. This time, however, both of you took it a little too far. Your body was sore and moving a muscle was an impossible mission. Neck, breasts and ribs covered with bruises, ass cheeks burning and you could still feel him deep in your belly, pulsating. It was hurting and a freaky part of you liked it. Liked that you would be reminded of this night and him for the next few days with every move you make. His strict voice telling you how good of a girl you are and his lips leaving red marks on your body.

Gray was still sweaty when he lay next to you, running his fingers through your hair gently, knowing you would break under his touch if he was any rougher.

“You’re in pain,” he says when you flinch while he adjusts his body next to you, keeping you warm. “Why didn’t you stop me?” he says next to your ear, his breath alone making you shiver.

“Because I liked it?” You say sleepily with a little smirk on your lips but eyes still closed. Grayson doesn’t find it funny at all and you can feel that he’s starting to feel guilty.

“It’s not funny” he grumps.

“I can take it, Im not a baby”

“I see that” his voice is filled with sarcasm “I should’ve..”

“Gray” you stop him before slowly turning around to face him, cup his face and look at him in his soft brown eyes that were glistening with hunger and lust just moments ago, “Please don’t feel guilty, it makes me feel bad too because I wanted it, okay? Let’s sleep now and spend the laziest Sunday tomorrow, what do you say?”

“Okay, that sounds nice,” he smiles and gives you the softest kiss on the lips “I love you”

“I love you too” you say and doze off to a much needed sleep.

You’re woken up by the sweet smell of coffee and butter filling your nose and lungs. The room is still dark when you open your eyes, to which you’re very thankful. Grayson knows how much you hate light shining into your room while you sleep. You check your phone next to his bed and there is already a message from Gray waiting for you:

Text me when you wake up :)

You do that and not a minute passes before he walks into the room with a tray in his hands.

“Morning” he says with the biggest smile on his face while he puts the tray next to you. Coffee, croissant and a bowl full of fruit waits for you to munch on and you realize how hungry you actually are.

“You’re actually the sweetest” you take the coffee and smell it while he sits next to you.

“You have to eat all of it, then, we can proceed to the next thing I have planned for you” his eyes are quirky and he acts mysterious as he turns the tv and puts youtube on.

“Next thing?” You say while sipping the coffee and feeling the caffeine slowly fueling your body. It hurts to move, but you try to hide it, otherwise, Grayson would probably feel terrible and that smile would fade right off of his pretty face.

“Yeah, you need to relax today” he takes the blueberry and brings it to your lips, “All of it” he demands and you take it.

You spent an hour lying in the bed watching videos, Grayson never lost your touch, whether grazing your arm gently or giving you lazy kisses on your whole body as if he wanted to heal every spot he touched the night before. You wish he knew how much you loved him then and how much you love him now, but words cannot express it. You were lucky to find each other so that you can explore your secret desires and you were ready for all that it comes with it, but also grateful that he cares so much to be with you now and care for you when you need him the most. Watching him kiss your ribs and breasts so carefully was the most beautiful sight in the world and you were sad when he lift his head, leaving the spot where his lips were cold and lonely.

“I think you’re ready for your bath now” he took the mug out of your hands and lifted you off of the bed as if you weighed one pound.

“You’re joking!” You screamed while he carried you to the bathroom.

He opened the door and a familiar smell overcame your senses. He remembered to put your favorite Lush bath bomb in.

“Gray” you give him a hard kiss on the lips, still in his arms. “Are you taking a bath too?” You ask teasingly knowing how much he hates baths.

“If you want me to” he puts you down “Hands up” he says and you lift your hands up obediently. He takes off his black hoodie from your body, leaving you completely bare in front of him.

“Thats fine, you can keep me company from here” you say and dip your toes in warm water. Grayson must’ve seen the pain on your face as you tried to lower yourself in the water so he offered you his hand and helped you sit down, making you feel like a little baby. You didn’t mind it though.

The bath was covered with foam and room smelled like cocoa butter, you closed your eyes and Gray put on some music. You tried to relax, but could feel his eyes on you the whole time making you distracted. You peek through your eyelashes to see him sitting on the floor, elbows resting on the side of the tub and his eyes looking straight at you, almost like a puppy waiting for attention.

“We went too far yesterday” he didn’t waste a second. You let out an irritated sigh and didn’t say anything for a moment. You hated that he acts as if he was the only one there last night. You could’ve stopped him any time but chose not to.

“What part exactly” you try to ease the tension and smirk at him “When you tied me up with your belt or when you sucked on my whole body insufferably slow?” You lean on the side of the tub and rest your head on your hand.

“Y/N, Im serious” he pushes his finger in the water and starts making circles with it. His eyes were distant and he seemed really worried. “I don’t like seeing you like this”

Once again you scoot closer to him and touch his nose with yours

“Gray, can we make a deal and stop with the pity party? I wouldn’t do anything I wouldn’t want to. Plus, you shouldn’t have fucked me that hard if you..”

“Stop!” he splashes water all over your face and you can’t help but laugh seeing him blush “You’re being very dirty right now” he tries to be mad but smile escapes his lips and he kisses you.

“But did you like it?” You ask wanting to know if you did good and if Grayson actually liked doing things he wanted to explore yesterday.

“I did” he looks at you under his brows almost timidly “And you were very good too”

Thats all you wanted to hear, your heart was fluttering and smile had to escape from your lips. Pleasing Grayson was your biggest turn on. He notices how your mood changed drastically, almost glowing and how you tried to hide your smile, putting foam in front of your face.

“You’re my little freak you know that?” he smiles at you and rests his head back down, watching you relax back down in the tub.

#grayson #dolan twins #grayson dolan #ethan #ethan dolan #smut #fic #fluff #whatever you like to call it?

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blood-woman · 7 years

Text

Genesis - An Original

"You can't let her out, some crazy shit happened the last time. I barely made it out alive." The man who kidnaped me warns someone as the huge door finally creaks open. "That's absurd and no reason for her not to be treated humanely." Another male says pushing the door further. It's the first time that door has opened in the past four days. I haven't showered since I left my house six days ago and I haven't eaten since I got off the plane in Hawaii five days ago. I thought I was taking a well deserved vacation and visiting a few friends. I was walking on the beach from my rental to my friends place when they grabbed me. Obviously they didn't know who they were messing with, unfortunately soon after they stuck me with a strong sedative. They put me in this vault with only a toilet and a thin mattress thrown on the floor, I was currently huddled in a ball on, freezing and starving. So now that the door was finally open I didn't have the strength or the energy to fight my way to freedom. Gently I feel strong arms wrap around me, lifting me up and into his arms. He starts walking but the room is so dark that when we get into a brighter lite room I can't seem to open my eyes to see who is carrying me so gently against his chest. God he's so fucking warm. "You should have left her in her cell. This is bad." My kidnapper warns again and I stiffen in his arms. His body tenses against me as he turns to I assume look at the asshole. "You will go see Liam and inform him of your blunderous activities." He growls as if he's done him the atrocity that this man has done to me. I hear his footsteps echo away from us as he grumbles something under his breath and we seem to continue in the opposite direction. We walk for a while and I'm so exhausted that I don't even bother to do or say anything, I just rest against him because at least for this moment I feel safe...for now. When we finally reach where were going he sets me down on something soft, it feels like a couch as I snuggle into its warmth. Missing the warm body I was so recently pressed against. I hear him make some orders, something about food and then to what I assume is someone else about clothes and a bath. Thank the heavens, finally someone who knows what a girl needs. Unfortunately I'm shaking again, I guess it wasn't all from the cold. Must be from the shock my body is going through from lack of nutrients, or specifically food. I tuck further into myself and the couch, trying to find some semblance of escape from it. "Here." He says as something lays on top of me. I feel him sit down beside me and struggle with my overwhelming need to scoot closer to his warmth, some how I manage. "I'm have a bath drawn for you but until then I had some food brought in, nothing special just sandwiches." He says and I can peek my eyes open to see a plate sitting on the couch between us. I don't bother to look at him as I start devouring them and he chuckles softly, then gets up sending out another order I don't bother to hear because of the food I'm consuming at probably a slow rate because of how im feeling but it feels like I'm shoveling it into my mouth. I barely even recognize that it taste like ham and cheese. "Whoa, slow down. Here's some water." He offers pressing the glass into my hand. I practically chug it as he chuckles a little more, then I devour the rest of my food. He takes them from me and then comes back, throwing off the blanket making me whimper a bit at the sudden chill but he steps closer picking me up, his heat searing my skin wonderfully. "You have some injuries that need taken care of but I wont be able to tell the extent of them until your clean. So I've had the girls draw you a bath and their going to help bathe you." He tells as we walk into a smaller room if only by my own gut feeling and I hear water running. He sets me down on my feet carefully but when trying to put weight on my right ankle I end up crying out and leaning back into him. "Bring me a chair." He orders gruffly and soon after he's setting me down on one and then I feel his hands on my ankle, I whimper as he rolls it in his fingers. I peek down at him while he's not looking and see hes got a nice head of brown hair and tan skin, he seems to be a pretty big guy. He rotates my ankle again and I grimace, my eyes squeezing shut as I grip the edges of the chair underneath me. Pain not only smothers my ankle but shoots up my calf as well, causing me to gasp audibly. "Help her." He growls and then I feel his heat pass me and the door shut behind me. "Alright hun, I'm Sara and this is Audrey. We're going to help you get cleaned up but first we need to get you out of these dirty clothes so if your ready just nod and we'll get started?" She asks and I nod, if they wanted me dead or naked they could have been able to achieve either with out the niceties. So I let them strip me of my clothes, groaning as I move sore limbs and they help me hop over to the tub and climb in. It must be one of those huge tubs cause the waters up over my breasts and I'm still sitting up for the most part. The water is hot and inviting, caressing each and everyone of my sore muscles as I lean my head back against its curved edge. "Thats it, relax honey. Let us do this for you." The other one, Audrey, coos and I sigh. It would be nice to be pampered for once, I just wish it was under better circumstances. They clean me, slowly, gently and I wince when they hit a sore spot and they take note of it, making sure its not too bad before moving on. When one of them starts washing my hair I can barely contain my soft moans, even as she giggles girlishly behind me. They wash me thoroughly and then help me dry and dress in a tank and yoga pants, finally I decide to open my eyes but I barely get a look at the luxurious bathroom before my world tilts and my head spins. Quickly they sit me back down in the chair and I lean over gripping my head in my hands as they finish drying my hair. "You've been through a lot hun, you need to take it easy." Audrey says and I feel her hands on the back of my neck, massaging. "Thank you ladies." The man from before calls as I hear his foot falls get closer, his arms wrap around me and he picks me up again. "Feeling better?" He asks and I hear him take a deep breath, his body flexing against mine. "Wow you smell good." He chuckles and I smile just a little against his shoulder. Again he sets me down on something soft but this time it feels like a bed, the sheets are amazingly soft. He sits down next to me his hand touching mine, I guess so he knows he has my attention. "My doctor is here, he's going to look you over and do something about how your feeling, alright?" He asks and I nod. "I'm Evander, by the way. Eli will be your doctor." He says and moves, another body taking his place. "I'm going to set up an I.V. because your dehydrated, a vitamin push and antibiotics. Then I can tend to your wounds. If you fall asleep don't worry I'll wake you if needed. Ok, just relax." He says positioning my arm straight and pressing a needle into my skin. I take a deep breath and start to drift off, god I hope they actually have good intentions. --------------------------------- "She has been summoned, it was your duty and now I'm stuck with it because you like her." Someone growled and then heavy foot steps get closer as I tried to un-fog my brain. "She's still healing, you cant just jerk humans around like wolves they'll break." My savior from earlier defends as a foggy figure comes to stand next to me. I'm trying to clear my eyes, blinking again and again. I rub them with one hand and the mean one scoffs. "See she's awake, lets go." He grabs my wrist and yanks it, effectively hurting it. I cry out and he lets it go instantly, I pull it back to my body. Rolling back into the bed. I still have needles in my arm where does he think he's taking me. "Shit she's fragile." "Here let me see." The kind one, I think he said his name was Evander, said and reluctantly I let him pull it away from my body. His fingers inspect it as I hide my face in a pillow trying not to groan in pain. "It's not broken, I think he might have sprained it though, I'll get Eli to wrap it." He says and a moment later I feel something being wrapped around my wrist and hand. "Enough, Liam is waiting. I don't understand why you care so much for a mortal anyway, they are gone in a blink of an eye. Lets go." He growls. "I'll take her." Evander interjects quickly, the brute probably went to grab me again. "Eli can you remove her I.V." A moment later he pulls it from my arm and carefully someone helps me sit up. I use my good arm to brush my brown hair back and finally get a look around though I keep my head down, no need to start something without knowing what I'm up against and they just referred to me as human and mortal which means they are neither. The room is lush, much nicer than my house back home but then again I never did like things over the top. "Fine." The mammoth of a man growls and stomps toward the door. "I'm going to pick you up again, ok?" He asks and I nod, he leans down to wrap his arms around me but stills when his eyes catch mine. We stay like that for a long moment before he smiles handsomely. "Your eyes are a stunning shade of purple." He says in an awed whisper and I nod purposefully as he continues wrapping his arms around me and lifts me against his chest. My arms wrap around his shoulders and as much as I would like to look around I keep my face close to his shoulder as we walk through hallways made of stone and rooms filled with expensive decor. After a good while I start to hear talking and it escalates quickly, of course thats the moment he would choose to walk us in that room and then immediately stop. "I'm going to put you on your feet sweetie, but you can still lean on me if you need to." He whispers in my ear and I simply nod again and he gently sets me down next to him, my one ankle is already starting to throb again as if expecting the pressure of holding my weight. I realized on the walk that I was covered in a good bit of bandages though the pain I was feeling was considerably less now that I had been treated and rested properly. I take in the room, theres got to be at least thirty people present. At least half look like guards and another five look like personal security, there's Evander and Eli apparently tagged along, hopefully for my health not others, the brute, there's two women in formal dresses. A handful of other men in black tie dress. One of the overly dressed men seemed to be the one in charge, as he was standing in front of three kneeling men. The same three men that took me in the first place. The sight of it makes me think of a bad mob movie, leaving a bad feeling in my gut. I try to take a step back but Evander holds me firmly in place. I can hear my heartbeat start to race in my ears and as a result I start shaking again. Almost instantly a sweater is wrapped around my shoulders and I look back to find Liam backing away. His eyes catch mine and he seems surprised as I turn back to carefully watch the scene unfold. But I'm playing catch up because the head guy has one dangling off the floor by his throat and the one who wanted not to let me out of my cell is staring at me in disbelief. As if this is all my fault. He attacked me, if anything they deserve what ever fate their about to receive. I look back at the leader just as he rips out the guys throat and he drops to the ground like a rag doll, blood pooling around his body. Oh shit, he just killed that guy. I knew something bad was going to happen, wait why is he killing them? Why wasn't I paying attention? Something about wasting his time? Wait! "Please sire, there she is the sister of Lisandra. I wouldn't lie, there she is." The man pleads but the other doesn't even glance in my direction which is good because now I'm shaking like a leaf and Evander is rubbing his hand up and down my arm but it's doing nothing to comfort me. "Thats Liam, by the way." He whispers in my ear and it occurs to me that Evander knew Liam was going to be upset with the kidnaper. But I doubt Liam cares about how I was treated and more about how his life was disturbed. Why on earth he would know my sister is beyond me, shes supposed to be in some third world country being a doctor. Not in Hawaii, doing what ever these people are doing. "I have no use for her and you have wasted my time, give me one good reason to let you live." Liam's voice is all command and authority, anger and instinct. I doubt he could give any excuse worthy enough to save his life. "Once I have dealt with you, I will deal with her in much the same manner. All thanks to you." He growls and then punches through the mans chest, ripping out his heart. My good hand flies to Evander's and he tries to comfort me further but how can you comfort some one about to be murdered for practically no reason at all. He casually sliced the other ones head off and I'm breathing so hard I'm starting to see spots. My head starts to hurt which usually means I'm about to do something stupid, like pass out hopefully. At least then I wont know what hit me, I'll just be dead and thats it. No pain, no fear just peacefully slipping off in my sleep. No such luck. Instead Evander steadies me and then moves away taking my new sweater with him. Liam steps around the bloody carcasses, while cleaning his hands with a towel as if he's wiping sauce from his fingers after a messy meal. He's only taken two steps past them when his body goes ridged and his eyes fly around the room, finally settling on me. He breathes deep and then roars loudly, the word wolves rattles through my brain like a ricochet. They've got to be werewolves, nothing else would really make sense. Right? "Told you, you smelt good." Evander whispers and I carefully look to see him smiling. I turn back to see Liam pulling at his clothes and then he starts to shift. "Oh and don't run." He teases from beside me and I steel myself for the worst. Grounding my body, letting my hurt foot push out a little from my body as I draw my fear in and only show my warrior. If this wolf wanted a piece of me he was going to have to work for it. By the time he's done his clothes are shredded and he stands as a massive fully covered in hair wolf. He growls loudly as he sniffs the air in my direction and then his eyes finally meet mine and he stops, studying me for a moment before charging towards me. "Liam don't, shes only human." Evan calls, worried. "You might kill her considering all her other injuries." Eli advises. Another woman yells something I don't quite hear as his growling becomes a deafening sound. I'm watching the space between us. He needs to be close for this to work, three feet, two feet. Go, I swing with my hurt ankle out wards flipping over his body, narrowly missing the ceiling and landing gracefully on one foot behind him. I hear a couple people gasp but I'm still watching my attacker. My body throbs at the sudden flexible movement but I don't stop to let it overcome me. He skids to a halt on the smooth stone floors, I'm sure he's not too happy about that embarrassing moment. Turning back to me, snarling, showing everyone of his pretty white fangs. I limp backwards a little, playing the hurt lamb. Which I am a bit but not as much as he would like. He closes in on me, charging once more and I spin at the last moment, rolling against his side. I come out near Evander who is looking like he can barely hold in his laughter. I don't wait for him to turn again and start flipping down the hall, it's my only real option to getting away with any speed with my hurt ankle. I tuck it in to keep from landing on it. But unfortunately my get away is not fast enough, he's on me again. Nipping at my hand just when I need it most, I yank it back. Throwing myself off balance and I try to use my legs to catch me but land on my hurt ankle, I hear a distinct cracking sound as my foot rolls unnaturally out from under me. I land hard on my ass as my ankle throbs and I whimper and gasp through the pain, pressing my forehead into the cold floor. Until I hear growling above me and snap my head in his direction as he walks over me, covering my body with his. I lean back on my arms and push my fear away, if I die today it will not be because I was weak. I find his eyes and hold them even as he snarls down at me. His scent fills my nose and I have to fight the urge to breath him deeper, his eyes are icey blue, his fur deep black. My god he's huge and he's so fucking warm, I'm actually starting to sweat. None of this do I show him and his doesn't change much more than to growl at me further. "Finish it." I order in barely whisper and his eyes shift for just a moment, something unsure, something almost scared. Jaws snap forward clamping firmly around my neck, forcing me to look at the ceiling. I steel myself for it, taking shallow breaths. His fangs dig in and I gasp as one actually breaks skin. For a moment everything falls away, its just him and me, no fear, no pain. His teeth pull back and his tongue winds around my neck as blood trickles from the wound. He licks up my blood like it's a delicious treat as I let out a throaty moan through no decision of my own and the world comes rushing back. Everyone is standing to one side of the hall and they all seem shocked as if this is the most surprising thing they've seen today. Unexpectedly Liam pulls back releasing me all together, my pain rushing back as the idea that I might actually get to live takes hold. Everything hurts as I close my eyes and pull myself together quite literally, when I open them again the wolf is back sniffing seeming to be checking for something. Abruptly he back off and shifts again, standing before me as a man, all be it a very naked man. he puts out his hand and someone puts a pair of pants in it and he slips them on. His face is set in stone but his eyes as he watches me look increasingly curious. "Eli, see to her." He orders and Eli drops to his knees beside me. "What hurts dear?" He asks, slipping the sweater back around my shoulders because I'm shaking again. I give him a pained look and he smiles wearily as if he knows my answer. He goes for my ankle first and frowns deeply when he sees the angle at which its positioned. Evander kneels down beside him. "It's broken now, before it was simply fractured." He takes a brace out of his bag and sets my ankle in it as I groan. He them checks my wrist, I had forgotten it was hurt all together. I guess with the adrenaline pumping through my system it simply didn't rate high enough for me to notice at the time. "It's fractured." He grumbles. Then moves on to my ribs, running his fingers across them as carefully as he can while still doing his job. "Well you still have three cracked ribs, are you having any trouble breathing?" He asks and I shake my head. "Alright, I'm going to check your eyes. Before you had a concussion, I'm just checking to make sure it isn't any worse. You should know your eyes were grey when I checked last night." He offered and went about his business. Thats funny, my eyes haven't been grey since they changed permanently to this purple color years ago. "She did all that with three cracked ribs and on one foot, I am thorough impressed." I look up to see the brute hovering over us. "Alright you seem ok other than what I've said. We need to get you back on the I.V. though, your still dehydrated and deficient in vitamins." Eli explains and Evander gets up and walks over to Liam, who hasn't taken his eyes off me for a second. They talk quietly, to quiet for me to even glisten a little off their conversation, though I assume Evander is explaining my need for moe medical attention and trying to figure out what Liam wants to do with me. I have no idea why he didn't just kill me, he certainly had the chance. I guess I'm too pretty to kill. It wouldn't be the first time I've been left alive because of my eyes. "I'm Killick, by the way." The brute offers and I nod. "Are you really Lisandra's sister?" He asks and I look up at him but don't offer an answer. "Your Cassandra right?" He asks and i glare up at him. How dare he think I'm her?! "What did you say to her?" Evander growls coming back towards us. "I just asked if her name was Cassandra." Killick explains and I run my good hand through my hair and try to calm myself. "Come on lets get you up." Eli offers and I nod, I would rather not be on the floor where everyone is staring at me. The moment I'm up it becomes harder to breath but Eli's not looking at me even though he's holding me up. I grab his chin and turn him back towards me, he then starts to look panicked as it gets even harder to breath and he lowers me back down onto the floor. Liam is suddenly hovering over me looking worried. "Try to stay calm Allison, just follow my eyes." He says in a calm voice beckoning me to listen, black spot start to cloud my vision but I keep my eyes on him. "Stay with me." He breathes just as I start to slip, gasping for air. I try to stay awake I really do but the lack of oxygen doesn't give me many options, so I slip. -------------- "She's in your rooms, in your bed, you wont let anyone but Eli touch her without losing your shit. Yet you still claim shes not yours, if that were true you would have killed her when you had your jaws around her throat." Evander growls through my fog induced haze, I can't even open my eyes. I must be sedated, so much so that I barely feel that I'm yet again shaking. Someone puts another blanket over my side but it barely helps, actually the shaking gets more violent. So much so thats its causing my other wounds to throb. I whimper as my hands clutch the sheets and I try to will my drug induced body into cooperating. Every muscle tensing, trying to keep the pain at bay which only makes it worse but I cant stop. "Ahhh." I cry out painfully. "You need to relax, its the only way to stop the pain." Eli advises. If I could I would Eli. I want to scream at him but don't. Such a stupid thing to exacerbate my condition, me taken out by a cold breeze. Wouldn't my father be proud. "Leave us." Someone orders and I feel the bed dip behind me and then a heated body presses against my back, draping an arm over my stomach. His heat envelopes me and slowly the shaking subsides, my body aching from the effort. His head sinks into the crook of my neck, breathing deep but I don't care as long as he doesn't move. "Sleep Allison, I'll be right here." He whispers in my ear and presses a kiss to my neck. I vaguely wonder how he knows my name before falling asleep once again. ----------------------------------------------------- "She's shivering and shaking again, I quite literally cant be any closer without her permission." I say softly as Eli leans over the other side of the bed checking Allison once again. She whimpers and grips the sheets as if just holding them would keep her safe. "Not again." She whispers and is dawns on me, she must be having a bad dream. God this woman is driving me crazy, every little sound she makes has me wanting to be near her, protecting her. Not to mention that before I was close enough to kill her and she practically asked me to do it. What in gods name? Other than that she barely talks, so I know almost nothing about her besides what she's shown me. She probably hates me after what she saw me do to those men and I threatened her life. Its no wonder she tried to get away. I gently shake her shoulder, trying to wake her from her nightmare. "She's not supposed to be able to dream on this sedative." Eli informs me and I frown. There's definitely something special about this girl, I just cant think straight when she's around. So it'll have to wait until later, for now I'll just try and comfort her best I can. "Allison its not real, you need to wake up." I say trying to rouse her gently. I roll her onto her back and her eyes gently open to look up at me. She looks tired but underneath that a tear rolls down the side of her face as she rolls into me. "Thank you." She whispers and closes her eyes again as she snuggles into my chest. I slip my arm under her head and setting back down. Wow, if I wasn't confused before this would definitely put me over the top. Fuck it, I'll save the thinking for later. ------------------------- 'Knock, knock.' My head vibrates a bit as the person im snuggled against growls loudly, a warning to who ever stands on the other side of the door. I stay as I am, no reason to leave my comfort for the awkward situation after until I have to. His arms wrap around me tighter as if who ever it is means me harm. "My apologies my lord but Jensen is asking for you." The person at the door offers quietly. "Not now." He growls. "My apologies again my lord but he was very insistent, he is desperate to know what happened to Lisandra." The man says and I stiffen in his arms, his head swiveling to look down at me. "Leave." He growls, I assume at the man since his grip on me has lessen none. The door shuts and slowly I look up into his tense blue eyes. I make no move out of his embrace and he makes no move to let me go. His eyes wash over my face as if he's look for something, lingering on my lips more than once. Liam seems to be a bit at a loss for what he wants to say first. "How are you feeling?" He asks and I take personal stock, for the moment and probably because I haven't moved, I'm in no pain. I simply nod and he seems to understand. "Do you need anything?" I shake my head no, mostly because I don't want to move yet. "You've been out of it for nearly four days. You must be hungry." As if on que my stomach growls making him smile. "I have to go speak with Jenson for a moment, but I will have Eli come check on you and a spread brought in." He says in a soft voice and I simply close my eyes again and tuck back in even as he tries to de-tangle himself from me. The moment the door clicks closed I realize that I have never had to pee more in my life and reluctantly I sit up, trying to take it slow. I slip my legs off the sit of the bed and notice the luckily they have my I.V. on a normal set up that rolls. So not only can I take it to the bathroom but it will help me get there. I go to stand but quickly remember my broken ankle, I'm looking down at it when Eli walks in looking very surprise, probably at my up right state. "Hey, whoa. What are you trying to do?" He says quickly moving to my side, looking very worried. I simply wave a hand towards the bathroom and he seems to understand. "Oh um let me get one of the ladies to help you with that." He says turning towards the door. "Eli." I call and he swiftly turns back looking stunned. "Please if you could just help me to the bathroom, I could take it from there. No need for someone else to get hurt just because I have a full bladder." I say softly and he's torn for a moment before moving back to my side to help me stand. Carefully he helps me move to the bathroom, at the door he releases me looking very concerned. I turn closing the door and i use the counter to hop over to the toilet to sit down. The bathroom is huge, I thinks its actually bigger than my whole master sweet back home. I'm leaning against the counter when a knock comes from the door and it squeaks open a little. "Excuse me Miss, its Audrey. We met the other day, I was wondering if you needed any help?" She asks with out opening the door anymore, so I know I will have to prompt her. "Please." I say and she opens the door enough to look at me and I give her a small smile. She turns closing the door and then back to me. "What can I help with?" She asks seeming like shes trying to control her actions. "Relax, I'd like it if you acted as yourself." I offer and she smiles widely. "I wanted to take a shower but I don't know if I have to be careful with my wounds, can you ask Eli for me and after you help me with the shower, warm clothes would be appreciated." I say and she nods. "Thank you." She bounces out of the room and after a few moments shes back. Helping me strip my clothes and then the bandages, braces and other items holding me together. She helps me hop over to the shower and strips down to her skivvies before we step inside and she turns on the hot water. I want to swoon as it hits me, caressing my cold skin all over but I manage to keep it together as she washes me completely. She helps me sit under the streams and then goes to get my clothes. My legs are crossed at the ankles and pulled up to my chest as my arms are wrapped around them, my face lifted up so water could fall on me. I sit there for a long time like that, even after I notice Audrey is waiting for me. I stay and relax, trying to make myself believe for just a moment, that I have no problems and life isn't really this hard. Unfortunately my peace is cut short with a loud growl followed by a, "What are you doing?" It's Liam, I guess he didn't like how long i was taking. "Sire, I...I was just waiting on the lady...the lady." She says sounding panicked. I reach out my hand using the controls to shut off the water so I can listen better. "She is not to be touched." He growled as he closed in on her and she whimpered, cowering in fear. A potent thing I had no problem discerning from the other smells in the room. "Leave her alone." I command in a loud voice that bombs around the large bathroom. He stills growling but now hes looking at me. Moving towards me. Audrey drops my shirt on the counter and practically runs from the room, scared out of her pretty little mind. "You have no power to command me woman." He growls and my eyebrows raise as he turns to find her but shes long gone, I'll be surprised if I ever see her again. "Are you upset with me for showering?" I ask, his head swinging back to me looking confused on top of still trying to be angry. "No, of course not." He admits. "Then since Eli is the only other allowed to touch me, did you expect him to assist me?" I ask and he actually steps inside the shower. "No." He growls loudly. "Did you expect me to ask you?" I ask a little softer looking up at him and he looks conflicted. "Audrey was only doing as i asked since i could not do it myself, she should not be punished for that. Do you taste her fear?" I ask looking away, it would do no good to see his thoughts change because he thinks i'm judging him. I wait a moment but he says nothing, "Do you enjoy it?" Hes very still for a long moment, then huffs and storms out of the room. My head rests on my arms as I wait for the answer. I moment later i hear a soft squeal and the bathroom door opens and closes once again. Audrey breathes heavily as she moves back to the shower opening. "Wow...thank you, so much...for sticking up for me." She says exasperatedly, trying to compose herself. Which makes me smile softly. "Here, please let me help you up." She says moving to my side, wrapping a towel around me as she helps me onto my one foot and out of the shower stall. She helps me dry and dress in a Henley shirt and another pair of yoga pants and then stops, brushing my hair as I brush my teeth. Seems Liam made sure everything was prepared for me. You know for a man that claims I'm not his, I can only guess that meant his mate, hes gone through an awful lot of trouble. Look at that my eyes and apparently scent saving my ass this time. I just need to be out of here before he figures out I'm actually not. Would love to hear some feedback, drum up interest and the like. If you would like to be tagged let me know and I'll figure it out. This is the first story I will have posted outside of a challenge. THANK YOU FOR ANY SUPPORT! -Shannon Stice (Bloodwoman)

#a book i'm writing #witchywriters #werewolves #alpha #magic #alexandria's genesis #my first story post #my original works #Genesis

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og-doubletrouble-kinnie · 5 years

Text

Marx Mem

Aighty this is long and it gets a bit dark I guess? Idk its a panic attack mem so.. Warned ig

After a really bad day at the news station (Katie and other various bosses being total fucking dicks. Writing 3 whole news reports in a single day AND Having to take care of food stuffs for the day cause our intern fucking d ied or something) I stumbled home fucking exhausted.

Pretty much the moment I get inside my apartment bastard speaks up "I can't believe you're tired. You barely did anything today."

I tilt my head back and forth and in a mocking tone I talk back "oh sure writing three full length news stories in a single day while making sure the staff is fed and keeping Katie off my damn back is nothing. Su r e"

I pull my gloves off, untie my bowtie and pull off my jacket as I head to the bathroom. Just wanna shower and pass the fuck out, I don't care that it's like 5pm, I deserve a damn nap. I realize I'm far to exausted to stay awake for an entire shower so I just opt for cleaning my face and hoping I dont just conk out on my bathroom floor.

I stand infront of the sink and just space out staring at the faucet for at least a minute. When I snap back to reality I look to my mirror- Surprised to see my actual reflection for a moment before bastard pops up. "Katie was right you know. You're such a slacker~ And you don't write nearly enough stories for her! The head anchor. Sure Tom is nicer to you but he shouldn't be doing the most talking! Keep the camera on Katie, Marx!! You're a man of taste, you know that everyone just tunes in for Katies chest- Hell thats why you tune in. 'Course you already know everything she's gonna say. Unless she throws your script away, like she really should every time cause you write utter filth. I'm surprised she even tries to read the mess you give her each day."

I honestly just stare tiredly into the mirror as he goes on and on, nodding occasionally cause I'm tired enough to believe him. His words blur out at this point and I manage to splash my face with water before tiredly making the stupidest comment I could possibly make while bastard is really active, "God I wish Angel and Bee were here-"

And bastard laughs at me. "Now why could you possibly want that???"

"Oh I dunno maybe it's cause I'm exhausted and curling up with my hoard seems really fucking nice, you pathetic piece of shit."

"Ah yeah I'm the 'piece of shit' have ya seen yourself lately?"

"Oh I'd love to but you seem to always take my reflections place."

"Oh wow Marxy has a bite now, huh?"

I glare into the mirror "Don't call me that."

"Why? Cause your precious little Angel gave it to ya? C'mon Marxy lighten up, it's not like I'm real."

I roll my eyes. Again with the "not real" thing, huh? Okay yeah sure. "Yeah, them being here would be great... I'd love to ignore you for the night." I turn from the mirror, ready to go sleep but-

He seems to not like when I want to ignore him... Cause- well thats when he brings out the big guns "What makes you think they want to be here?"

I freeze... He usually doesn't get to me like this... But ya know- I'm exhausted.. And hearing that one sentence makes my mind swarm with all the things Angel and Bee could be saying about me- about how much they could hate me... I can't shake it away with logic cause it practically doesnt exist in this moment. I turn back to the mirror. "I- I don't-"

"Exactly. There's no reason for either of them to want to be around you."

"Y- yeah-" I nod slowly and lean against the wall, glancing at the mirror for a moment before looking to the floor.

"I mean, just look at you! You're pathetic!"

I listen and look back to the mirror, my reflection is back. My eye bags are huge, my hairs a mess (more so than usual), he's right. I look pathetic... Of course I do. I always do... I slide down the wall, mostly due to my legs being to tired to hold me up, but also cause it's where I belong. The floor is the proper home for someone who looks like such trash.

"Do you really think they care about you? Oh sure Angel's stopped taking blood but who's to say thats his choice? He probably stopped cause Charlies buckling down on his drug problems~ If thats the case, then why would he bother to still have sex with you? Maybe you've somehow convinced him you're the only one he should be with? How cruel... Why should you hold him back? Why even bother talking to him when you're so controlling and possessive??"

I bring my knees closer to my chest, instinctively curling up to try and block him out. I try to mumble a stop but only manage a small squeak. I feel my claws digging into my arms but dont do anything to stop it.

"Oh and Dont even get me started on Bee! You're clearly manipulating him too! Why else would he call you "boss"? Why else would he do nearly anything you ask of him? Oh sure he could easily take you down if he found a problem with you, but what if you're all he has? He puts up with your constant abuse because he thinks he can't get anyone else? Do you really think he wants to put up with you? That either of them do?"

I shake my head. I dont know if I'm answering him if trying to refuse it.

"Just look at what happened with Baxter. How long until you somehow corrupt them aswell?"

"B-"

"Pfft- Surely you didnt think Baxters actions were his own?? My my, Marx I knew you were stupid but I didnt realize it was that bad. You obviously made Baxter feel inferior, even you knew that. But you never dealt with it. You let it fester and grow. I bet you just loved watching Baxter hate himself all because of you? Don't try to deny me, Marxy. I know it all, its so incredibly obvious I'm surprised nobodies figured it out yet... Then again, if you cant even figure this out about yourself, then maybe your friends have the intelligence of rocks!"

Now I feel a few tears run down my cheeks and go to wipe them- But.. Well I suppose I've broken skin on my arms cause I just smear blood on my face.

"Oh nice job you fucking idiot. What are people gonna say when they see those scars? They'll think you're some kind of edgy teenager. Then again- you might aswell be. Constantly wanting the attention of others."

I shake my head harder, hands moving from my arms to my head "n-no... It- it was an accident-"

"Awe... But that doesn't matter Marx! The point is that you did it in the first place!"

I whimper and shake- pulling my hair hard enough that I feel I should be pulling out hairs.

I hear the faintest door in the distance- due to how muffled it sounds I assume it's a neighbors door...

Bastard.. Thankfully quiets down for a moment- I manage to move my hands back to my arms- I can't loosen their grip... But scraped up arms are easier to deal with than a scraped up head.

Then Angel comes in- "Ma- Oh my god- Bee! Bee I found him-!" Angel crouches down beside me and very carefully grabs my hands, and pulls them from my arms. "Marx wh- What happened?"

I hear bastard laugh from the mirror "You can't tell him. He won't believe you."

"I-"

Bee comes in- Fast. "Boss?!" I assume Angels tone must've scared him- and well. He scares me- I jump, grabbing my arms again and my wings pop up.

Angel grumbles "Damnit- Bee ya scared 'im-"

I scoot away before Angel can try to pry my hands free again-

"Mar-?"

"N-no no- you're- You're not supposed to be here-"

Bee crouches down by Angel, "Boss what're ya talkin 'bout?"

"Oh you're finally pushing them away now?" I glance at the mirror- bastard is just eating this up.

My hands get tighter as my eyes dart back to Angel and Bee. I stare like a deer in headlights- expecting them to.. I dont know- do.. Something...

Angel turns to Bee "Bee see if you can find some bandages- I'll... Try and calm him back down..."

Bee nods, gives me a sad/worried look then gets up and leaves the room. Angel shuffles over to me, and I instinctively push myself farther into the corner.

"Marx I'm not gonna hurt you- it's alright..."

"He's talking to you like youre an animal. He sees you as dangerous. He has every right to. You could attack at any moment."

"Sh- s hut up-"

Angel tilts his head "Wh-?"

"Awe look how cute, he thinks you're talking to him."

"Shut up"

"Mar-" He looks concerned... Possibly scared..

"You're scaring him~ Of course you are... You probably scare him often.."

I shoot up, yelling toward the mirror "I said shUT UP!!!" I hear a loud thud and suddenly my hand hurts- I punched my wall...

Theres a small crash in the kitchen and Bee comes running in, holding a roll of bandages- I look down to Angel- And yeah.. He looks scared- So does Bee- I drop my hand from the wall and back away the few inches I can without stumbling into my bath-

"C-can't... Can't you hear it" I try not to physically cringe at how... Pathetic I sound

I hear bastard laugh, and Bee and Angel exchange a confused look.

"Hear... What, Boss?"

"I- it. The voice. I- I can't- I can't be the only one-" One hand goes back to my hair.

"Oh you sad, sad man..."

Angel gets up and comes over to me- Grabbing the hand in my hair and pulling it down before I can start pulling. "Marxy.... Hun- Are you alright...?" He lowers me onto the side of the tub.

I stare at the floor, squinting slightly "I-... I don't???"

Angel gestures at Bee, he steps over, handing Angel the bandage roll then sitting next to me. He puts a hand on my back, rubbing small circles.

"Let me see your arms, Marxy-"

With the extra exhaustion from the panic attack I just tiredly listen to him, flopping my arms on my lap- my wings vanishing. Angel starts wrapping them up. I feel myself yawn, and I lean on Bee, he moves from rubbing my back to putting his two arms on that side around me. I feel myself starting to doze off- but I'm still jumping awake each time.

When Angel finishes wrapping my arms, he picks me up and heads for the bed. I glare at the bandages, My tired dragon brain doesn't like them... So I bite at them- Or at least I try but Angel baps my nose. "Don't you even try, Mister."

I tiredly whine and grumble, flopping into Angels chest. "B u t.... I dont-"

"I dont care if ya don't like 'em, you need to heal and bitin your bandages aint gonna help."

Angel sets me down on the bed and I pbbthh at him. Him and Bee climb in on either side of me and I yawn again.

"Sounds like ya need to sleep, Boss-"

"Mmrmm..." I roll over and face Bee, "No shit... Katie n the others worked me like a dog t'day..." I shove my face into the Matress

"Don't they overwork you every day?"

"Ye s it was just worse this time"

I feel Bee pat my back a few times, and Angel cuddles up to my side and starts talkin, "Well we wanted to go to the bar- But a nap sounds pretty nice instead..."

Bee hums in agreement- he doesn't lay down though... Just stays sitting next to me and keeps a hand on my back.

There's a few moments of silence, but I eventually pass out.

#nervouswreck #tw blood #tw panic attack

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