#no one can tell me patriarchy isn't real

[sweet-as-an-angel]

Yandere Kencanons

Warnings: Kidnapping, Abduction, Major Spoilers for The Barbie Movie, Unhinged Post, Possessive Ken, Ken Just Wants to be Loved, Petnames, Ken Being Condescending, Post-Patriarchy Ken, No Pronouns Used for Reader Except 'You'.

Simply put, you’d charmed Ken. Made his non-existent heart flutter and a feeling he always associated with Barbie to overtake him. Been in the wrong place at the right time. Hence, less than a few hours after your meeting with Kenneth, you were in Barbieland. Sorry - Kendom Land.

You’d made the mistake of asking him for the time, in a rush to make it to work. And, with a twinkle in his eye and a seeming newfound sense of purpose, he proclaimed that “You respect me!”

Dazed and with little else you could say, you shrugged. “I mean…I guess…?”

And that was enough for him.

“I must go – get back to Barbieland – spread the news about patriarchy!”

You'd humoured him, more for the promise of your own safety than actual agreement, and he tipped his hat to you, billowing away in the direction of Venice Beach in a haze of his own world.

You managed to dodge him initially, untangling yourself from his vacant stare and making it to work unscathed.

On your way to lunch a few hours after, however, you were accosted again.

Of course, by none other than Ken Carson.

Who, having put all he’d learnt from his books on horses, the Wild West, and patriarchy, literally lassoed you and threw you onto his shoulder.

“We’ve gotta get you back to Barbieland – the Kens are not gonna believe this !”

On your journey back to this mysterious place, Ken explained to you how Barbies usually rule everything while the Kens are left with nothing.

“But, with you at my side, I’m sure we can make it right!”

You genuinely chalked this guy up to be insane, if at most, an escaped patient.

However, as you traversed 2D landscapes, you were more inclined to believe him. That this fabled Babrietopia did in fact exist.

And, once you get there, you become Patriarchy Ken’s personal servant.

He tells you to “Brewski Beer” him, all the while talking about how his initial conception of patriarchy had been that it was “Horses who ran the world, but it’s actually men — and horses are men extenders.”

He calls you his “bride-wife” or “groom-husband”, which, compared to the other Kens’ long-term distance low-commitment casual partners, seems oddly…endearing. Dangerously permanent.

With no idea how to get back to the Real world, you’re stuck with Ken and his entourage of fellow Kens, the Barbies either indoctrinated into their way of thinking or in hiding.

Speaking of, you are basically Ken’s property.

And he treats you as such whenever one of the other Kens tries to accost your service.

His tone is low, eyes sharp. “(Y/N) is my long-term distance low-commitment partner, not yours, Ken.”

And, to show as much, you get to sit on the floor next to Ken as he watches the Godfather with his Kentourage, talking through the whole thing, commenting on its ingenuity and nuance.

He also makes you stay nearby whenever he changes outfits - which is just him changing into another faux mink coat, pants and headband.

Despite being this new, independent, untethered Ken, he asks your opinion on things which seem largely inconsequential. Still, you sense something unstable. Insecurity, perhaps.

"What about...this coat?"

"Isn't that the same as the last one you showed me?"

Ken looks at your glass reflection in the wardrobe doors. His smile glitches, falters. He replaces it.

"Yeah, course - I was just testing you, seein' if you were paying attention."

Whenever you get a moment alone, away from the madness of the Kens, it’s short-lived. For Ken is never far behind, seeming to materialise in the doorway of whatever room of the Dreamhouse you’ve adopted as your refuge.

“What’s wrong, tiny baby?” He says, sauntering over to you, snake-like.

“I want to go home, Ken,” You tell him, voice racked with sobs, tears in your eyes.

He just gives you a narrowed, confused look, adopting an almost incredulous posture as if to say ‘Why?’

“First of all, I don’t like your tone, Doll,”

He steps towards you. You step back.

“Second of all, why in Kendom Land would you wanna leave ?" Another step forward. Another step back. "This is the dream of any patriarch’s partner to be where you are now; it should feel just like home !” Another step forward, another step ba-

Your legs hit the edge of the bed.

It doesn’t matter how hurt - or frightened - you look. Ken doesn’t listen.

“And besides, do you know how many Barbies would kill to be where you are now ? I know Weird Barbie would.” And he smiles – smirks – as if he’s triumphed you in some way only he is aware of, hands on his waist. The image of power.

Ken tends to test his boundaries when it comes to physical affection.

Seeing as he received none with Barbie, he seems to want to try his luck with you.

And yes, this does include him puckering his lips and staying stood in front of you until one of you caves.

Usually, it’s him, causing him to retract and act as if nothing happened. Which it didn’t. 

But when he really wants a kiss, he can persist for hours.

You timed him. Two hours and three minutes until you relented and pecked him.

“Wow,” he says, every time, as if it’s the first time, his eyes clouded with dreams and what you could only pen as whimsy.

He’s incredibly touch-starved. Show him an ounce of willing and he’ll be overjoyed in his own, new, macho way. Though, he does have a hard time containing a squeal whenever you touch skin.

Secretly, he's entranced by how...human you are. how different you feel and talk to the other dolls in his Kendom.

He's developed an obsession interest with your hands, holding them in his, telling you how small and soft your hands are compared to his.

He squeezes them whenever he gets the chance, commenting on how "Squishy" your fingers are, despite you having a skeleton beneath your skin - a concept that blows Ken away every time you explain it to him.

He also adores hugs. Though, he only hugs you/lets you hug him when out of view of other Kens. He needs to protect his image as the stoic leader, after all.

Loves a cuddle; goes stupid crazy for them.

He favours holding you to his chest and resting his chin atop your head. He finds your warmth a foreign comfort. While you find his lack of a heart – and a beat – a discomfort.

“S’nice and warm,” he says, eyes closed, the image of laxity. "Being here with you."

He mumbles that last part. You know not to inquire further. The Kens consider any form of genuine affection to be a weakness.

It’s in your best interest to just let him stay there and talk about whatever it is he’s fascinated himself with, lest you wish to incur a temper tantrum or the cold shoulder.

Aside from being a fan of hand-holding, he's also a partaker in wrist-holding.

If you ever do something to aggravate him, he tends to grip your wrist hard enough to make you wince, his jaw clenched, eyes narrowed.

“Something wrong, Babe?” He’ll say, tone deep with simmering wrath.

You know not to push it with Ken.

Despite how platinum and perfect he is, he does harbour a resentment which, whether caused by you or not, he seems to target you with.

Talked to a Ken for too long, or in a way he didn’t like?

He’s going to embarrass you in front of him. Make you seem undesirable to all who are not himself.

He knows he can’t make you disappear, given the fact that you’re mortal. But he knows he can make other Kens disappear; an idea that, the first time it appeared to him, frightened him, made him confront a darker half he’d repressed. But, as time went on, he’s learnt to harness it in ways you’d never have suspected from a Ken.

Not that you’d know it from the way he treats you, but he does actually care for you.

Perhaps…as much as, even more so, than he does — did — for Barbie.

He doesn’t feel like he’s tethered to any one job or image when he’s with you; his identity is not an extension of yours. But, he does try to treat yours as if it is an extension of his.

“Babe, hurry up with those beers — the game’s about to start !”

He knows you’re impervious to the effects of his brainwashing, given that you’re from the Real World, so he feels that you’re the most genuine person in Kendom Land. Hence he tends to treat you with equal harshness and care.

This also often leads to Ken asking you things about your world. Things he doesn’t yet have the answers for.

His favourite pastime is to lay his head on your thighs while you sit against the headboard of his bed, asking you any and all questions that come to mind.

“What’s your favourite colour?”, “Where does the sun go when it’s night time?”, “What did you do at your job?”

Personal ones like that last one often cause you to tense, and Ken can tell. He tends to refrain from asking you such questions now, seeing as any reminder of your life prior to this cause you to, what he has learnt to call it, cry.

Despite how tone-deaf Kenneth can be, he is actually rather intuitive. Or, rather, considerate.

When you’d told him your favourite colour, he’d painted his bedroom walls in it. Albeit a slap-dash job of it, given how interior design is not in his box description like Interior Design Ken, but he tried !

Despite his small acts of kindness being his attempts to imitate comfort, they do little to calm you. For everything he says, does, discussing a future with you in Kendom Land, changing aspects of his world to cater to your preferences, feel as if you are to take up unwilling, permanent residence here.

And, while you wait and plot for a way to escape, you exist as a perpetual puppet for Ken to mither and berate and order around.

In the real world, a doll has started appearing on shelves – a new range of ‘Misery Barbie/Ken’ dominating the toy aisles of every supermarket and toy store, your visage wrapped tightly in every box.

Tears, an outfit demeaning enough to make a grandmother faint, and the unwavering expression of the need for freedom.

Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)

Masterpost Masterlist

Yandere Masterlist Juicy Original Content <3

#barbie #barbie movie #barbie 2023 #greta gerwig #ryan gosling #the barbie movie #and ken #kenergy #just ken #barbie and ken #ken carson #ken barbie #yandere #male yandere #yandere x reader #ken x reader #ken x you #ken x y/n #ken x male reader #ken x female reader #yandere ken x reader #yandere ken #yandere ken carson

[butch-reidentified]

anyone here seen the show Resident Alien?

bc holy shit am I obsessed with the portrayal of 30-something women, their solidarity, feminism, friendship, and fun and self-expression! GODDD I did not realize how BADLY I needed to see a tv show actually depict (attractive but not "bikini models" by any means) adult (and admit they're adults, real adults not 20 yr olds) women as human beings with deep complex personalities and relationships, who really stand with each other despite being flawed humans who do sometimes hurt each other, who are silly and goofy and get into shenanigans bc oh my god WOMEN CAN STILL HAVE FUN AFTER TURNING 30.

Especially later in season 1 and in season 2 (I'm still on s2), there's just so much female badassery and solidarity that I love. there's also a gym workout scene in s2 with my favorite character D'Arcy and tbhhhh that scene is 😨🥵 Like, my wife said "this scene was definitely filmed by a lesbian, right?" 💀 It really did feel like celebrating an attractive woman build muscle without the typical male gaze-y lens. it actually focused on her flexion, facial expressions, sweat, flushing, yk, the things we are supposed to pretend women don't do even while vigorously exercising.

this same woman leads her friends on a drunken midnight raid of town hall where they review the town budget and discover they're paid less than the men. cut to the entire group of women (one of whom is the mayor's wife) standing in the mayor's bedroom in the middle of the night, standing over him and informing him "no, this isn't a nightmare, what the fuck is wrong with you, pay us fairly" like?? holy shit lmao. D'Arcy then proceeds to RENT A HELICOPTER to drop fliers all over town telling women about this and encouraging female solidarity in fighting back. this barely scratches the surface of her character's feminist heroics. in another seen she cuts the brakes on her best friend's abuser's truck and sends it down a hill in front of him, before telling him she'll happily kill him if he gets near her friend again. it's just so much fun to see. she also rescues herself and 2 others from a crevasse in the glacier by climbing 30 feet in a storm with a broken wrist. oh and shes a FORMER OLYMPIC SKIER bc fuck you

I've actually been very impressed with this show in a number of ways. they have a young girl character whose family is Muslim, and the writers seem to want to critique Islam while being aware that they have to avoid performative liberals picking up on this too much. so at first I was a bit 👀 thinking they were going a certain way with the character, but they ended up sneaking in a lot of critiques of Islamic patriarchy. they keep surprising me.

#mine #resident alien

[wonderpommey]

Well Jesse said it, no one truly changes and indeed nothing really changed in the couples’ dynamics in the end.

The show dangled a possible happy ending for Connor and Willa for a second but of course it tears it away in the finale. We already see Willa squirming under Connor’s grip, grappling with the “sexy second week itch”. Roman is particularly repulsed by that pairing; buying a young escort-type woman and parading her as somehow worthy, as a ‘wife’. There’s something so offensive to him about that. We never see Roman give Gerri anything of monetary value. He’d never want to buy her, he’s desperately attracted to how real she is, to the experience and things she can teach him, in every possible way (sex & advice). He wants what she is willing to give, not what he can buy. The only time money comes into their relationship is the exit package (pass!) and even that is essentially just another lesson she’s teaching him. You wanna rule with emotion, the next person will take you for everything you’re worth!

Shiv's adoption of Tom remains partly strategic. It moves from "not being betrayed" to "holding onto power", it has very little to do with love. Shiv continues to push sadistically to see how much she can get away with, how close patriarchy will let her get to being her own woman. Then, when Tom or Logan tells her she’s gone too far, she folds. And Tom loves her enough or loves being in the fold enough that it works in the succession universe, it becomes a deal of somewhat terrifying equals. And that was what succession was all about. Capitalism, patriarchy and the oppression of women. What men demand things like love and care from women, but they actually lose any genuine connection the second they take a woman's agency away from her… Sure you get her by your side physically for a while but you crucially loose her very desire to be there.

Roman and Gerri’s relationship remains a study in longing and sensuality. They are barely featured in the finale but Roman sets the tone by going down on mummy’s cheese. Oh succession and its cheesy genitals, the ricotta dick! The grilled cheese with a sucked dick! The whole kitchen scene is obviously an allegory about the lack of food and incidentally love Caroline has supplied to her children. It’s only scraps, rot and fire going into that smoothie. But Oedipus-Roman, doesn’t want the smoothie, he wants the tasty morsel of maternal love which isn't for him. He doesn’t bite by the way, he only licks. Unlike his last second on screen, he can’t go as far as actual consumption. Did he want Lobster? No, he wanted the most love. Did he want steak? No! He wanted to be picked above Kendall!!

Speaking of what’s not for him... He then has to watch Gerri talk about the pleasures of a slow screw. It’s a sudden exposure to her sexuality, a validation of his intuition that she likes being superior to her conquests, sexually, spiritually. Something he knows he can give her alongside the painful realisation that she opens up - to others - in that way.

Then the office breakdown. I still look good, I still look the part “Why isn’t it me?” What are the rockstar and the molewoman when the rockstar is just a big sack of bullshit? And Ken reaffirming he’s not good enough, he’s pure emotion, he doesn’t have the drive, he only ever wanted a ride or die.

All culminating in his only true, almost naturalistic documentary-style consumption of the season; Gerri’s martini. Drinking in the quasi love of his life (I could do a whole post about how wild it is that Jesse ‘I don’t want to tell you what to think’ Armstrong said something so totalitarian). This isn't the first connection between an older woman’s sexual appetite and her drink of choice this season! Remember Roman’s reaction to the image of Nan liking her wine like she likes her men!

Sure, the outer layer of that scene shows Roman, having lost the company, his lover/mentor's good will, and any way he knows of interacting with his siblings in a bar drinking alone, overly dressed, old Hollywood style. A potential regression to his sad playboy lifestyle (Jesse), or the start of a hopeless spiral of alcohol abuse (Mark - who has since then said he saw how Roman’s ending could be perceived as hopeful). 

Upon closer inspection, his inferiority/beta complex, his emotions, his desire to be loved, his desire NOT to be in charge/on top - everything that his dad loathed to see in him - are finally showing through the physical scars on his face. He gave it a valiant try, but he couldn’t keep parading as whomever Logan wanted him to be and he realises that it makes him an unworthy heir and in the same breath, access to Gerri is disallowed. It still overwhelms him with emotion, but in the same way Oedipus took his own eyes and couldnt see Jocasta and longer, Roman only gets to see Gerri through screen and glass anymore. He demanded she believed he was as good and as ruthless as his dad and he turned out not to be. Objectively, it’s not a prerequisite to Gerri’s feelings for him as she responds to his pathos way more than she does to Logan's death, but his psyche is convinced he no longer deserves to be in her presence.

So he does the only thing he can do to keep her as close as he needs. Don't be fooled by the luxurious, civilised quality of the drink, this is a biological need,  pure sustenance (Get her inside of him, under his skin, into his bloodstream and pumping to his heart). He bites his lip as the liquid enters his mouth, swallowing dramatically, loving the burn & hating the pain. 

And we’ve come full circle on the theme of consuming each other. From the partnership-worthy mutual cannibalistic proposal of season 2, to the toxic if slightly castrating injunction for her to go down on him and devour him. Season 4 breaks him enough that he gets to the opposite nihilistic ideation that he’s nothing and hence has no claim on the company or being her protégé. The truth - that we don’t know if he can get to - is somewhat in between. All these kids are very smart and worthy in their own ways, even though of course the expectation placed on them to be exceptional prevents them being satisfied in being maybe just that.

His final scene showcases the sad and lonely consumption of the woman he loves’ essence, a poor ersatz for the ‘old gal’s juices’ that he doesn’t deserve. All he has to offer being something he has never been able to name or express without the alibi of the company; an amorphous, unworthy, unnamable but ultimately undeniable feeling.

And possibly in the writers’ minds, this is the suicide part of their contemporary Romeo & Juliet drama. Dying with the blade and the poison after daddy said the love was unacceptable & unobtainable? I mean come ON! 

Roman “knifed” Gerri (This is rhetoric they use ON THE SHOW), she completed the execution by taking herself out and brought him the threat of annihilation (while ordering the poison; a martini). There is a delicious poisonous quality to the drink isn’t there (or its abuse)? And of course, if he dies he’ll die by her, he’ll taste the poison she chose off her lips, because if he has lost the love of his life in this eternal quasi status, it becomes the only worthy pursuit.

That was the roman-esque question of the show. What is love if it’s always been withheld, if it’s always been expressed via the proxy of the company, if it’s never been given freely, or modelled or held as something precious and worthy that had to be protected? And what if it makes you ravenous for it? And how could you get it, this thing you most desperately want, if you’d never been given the tools?

O true apothecary, Thy drugs are quick. Thus with a kiss I die. 

#roman roy #succession hbo #gerri kellman #romangerri #shiv roy #tom wambsgans #connor roy #willa ferreyra #sorry this isn't a hopeful post #obviously Gerri finds him and tells him she loves him the way he is #he finds a way to make himself feel worthy again #I'm just pulling the thread laid by those evil writers

[genderkoolaid]

theres a podcast i really really love but the hosts in a recent episode started talking about "what kind of energy would nonbinary people have?" because obviously everyone has a masculine or feminine energy. the conclusion they came to was that they would have a masc/fem energy but that doesnt invalidate their gender because one of the hosts has masculine energy and her boyfriend has feminine energy

it was so painful to listen to, they didnt take a moment to question whether masculine or feminine energy was real, they just accepted it so immediately. its so weird like how easily squares will just accept the gebder binary if you call it by any other name

as someone whose very into religion & spirituality i see this shit all the time and it never fails to annoy me.

like. there is nothing inherently masculine about taking action, being worldly/physical, being rational, etc. and there is nothing inherently feminine about being dynamic, being emotional, being creative, being spiritual/unworldy. the only reason these traits are combined & associated with those two words is because of (largely Western) gender roles.

if the idea of binary energies is really important to you, you can just. choose not to use those specific words! call it dynamic vs stable energy, call it physical vs spiritual energy, call it lunar vs solar energy, whatever. steal from the pokemon game titles. if it really "isn't about gender roles," then simply choose to not use gendered language!!! Don't parrot the most blatantly patriarchal ideas and then tell trans* & gnc people "no don't worry its actually not about gender!! everyone has some masc & fem energy (and only those exist) so you shouldn't feel excluded because im telling you you shouldn't :)"

I have a personal rule that I do not place trust any spiritual person who uses masculine vs feminine energy. Not that I will be an asshole or refuse to talk to them, but if you are using patriarchal spiritual language- especially if you are claiming to be trans*-friendly- you make me trust you less. Because I really question how much work you've put into your own internalized patriarchy if you think that saying "women are emotional and men are rational" is feminist and pro-trans* if you just pretend like its not gendered.

also if you are a feminine cis girl calling yourself a "masculine woman" because you're decisive, I'm gonna eat through the walls of your house

#m. #ask box

[autolenaphilia]

Sometimes I come across a post that is so obviously wrong that it begs for refutation, but like then I realize that I already refuted it, multiple times.

Like my post about feminism and this one about Farrell's fallacy, itself a re-iteration, handily refutes the screenshoted post above.

There are seldom any new arguments, just old ones heated over. The argument about working class guys male privilege has been a mainstay of anti-feminist arguments on the left for decades, at least since the 1960s.

This is a screenshot of part of an argument too, and how this anti-feminist is arguing tells me it's best to not engage. I'm not that interested in enduring abuse to prove that my daily experiences with transmisogyny are real.

I suppose this one is interesting because it outright states that they literally think "privileged" means having an "absolute position of power." This is a common mistake, but it's a strawman that ignores intersectional feminist analysis.

That's the underlying basis of all Farrell's fallacy type arguments, it ignores intersectional analysis. It assumes that if someone is marginalized on one axis, it means they can't possibly be privileged on another axis. So if a man is oppressed for being non-white or disabled or working class, it means he can't possibly have any male privilege. If they don't have absolute power, it isn't privilege. Thus any feminist claims about the patriarchy and male privilege are wrong.

The other hand of this argument is that any privilege women can have is used to deny the existence of misogyny. Here it is that mothers as parents have power of children, leading to abuse. The same blogger uses the white privilege of white women in the exact same way in another part of their argument.

I'm again repeating myself, but this is only an argument against the most simplistic non-intersectional feminist analysis possible. Men can have male privilege but also be oppressed for other reasons, such as racism, class and disability. Their marginalization curtails their male privilege, but it will show in comparison with women who experience marginalization for the same reasons. And women can be privileged on the basis of things like race and class, but that doesn't mean the misogyny they experience on the basis of being women isn't real. Misogyny isn't the only oppression out there, but that doesn't mean it isn't real. For more, see the posts linked above.

(Sidenote: the abusive mother argument in the screnshotted post is so dumb. Because yes, mothers frequently abuse their power over their children and we need youth liberation, but that ignores the context of how in the patriarchal family women often are reduced to only having power over her children. While men have power over both his wife and the children.)

It's all just using one axis of oppression to deny another. And because of widespread transmisogyny on this site even among supposed queer leftists, it's often misogyny that is denied.

#my writings #feminism #misandry is not real #misogyny #transmisogyny

[ventbloglite]

Some of you really need to step back a little bit and acknowledge how ignorant you are towards how misogyny affects trans mascs and how you yourself may be perpetrating said misogyny when speaking ill of trans mascs.

Which is not something you should be doing at all, fyi. You can talk about individual shitty trans mascs and certain community issues you dislike which involve or are perpetrated by trans mascs without just being transphobic towards trans mascs in general.

So many times I've seen the sentient of 'AFAB's have it really easy, everyone accepts AFAB's as trans, everyone loves AFAB trans people, the world caters to you, there is basically no problems for you if you're AFAB unlike AMAB folk' shown in a variety of ways from a variety of people including just outright saying it. Not to mention the belitting of trans masc experiences with transphobia and misogyny + the way those interact because they identify as men even though transphobes still consider them to be women and don't give a shit about their actual gender.

A main crux of transphobia (though many other factors which result in hating us come into play, too many to go into now) is that trans people are seen as and treated as their AGAB and punished for not identifying as it or portraying it 'correctly' by society. So tell me why so many seem to 'forget' about how misogyny impacts trans masculine people. Could it be because you believe that advocating for trans women and trans femmes and fighting transmisogyny somehow must involve being transphobic towards trans men due to that radfem influence you've absorbed? The world will never reach gender equality of any kind if everything is 'men versus women' so can we just fucking not bring that into trans spaces please.

Examples!

I saw recently a post which perfectly pointed out the potential risks associated with someone considered 'male' growing out her hair but OP clearly knew absolutely nothing about the same risks associated with someone deemed 'female' cutting his hair. Instead of not making that post or doing some research, OP thus assumed there weren't really any risks likely due to already believing that AFAB trans people have it easy.

The ignorance! Misogyny heavily impacts the way hair is treated on those perceived as women (including body hair) and women/those perceived as women have no end of people policing what they can and can't do with their bodies often taking things to the absolute extreme to do so. Short hair on woman may seem 'more accepted' but AFAB people of any gender could quickly tell you multiple situations where it's not and results in the same violence, abuse, homo(lesbo/butch)phobia and yes possibly even death depending on the situation even if you still identify as a woman. Pretending this doesn't happen is straight up misogyny btw.

'AFAB's pass easily by doing basically nothing' is another frequent one which makes me laugh. 'Passing' for most trans people is so situational and so dependent on what you do or don't do to strictly conform to gender stereotypes if you're even able to do that at all. To suggest that the world ignores feminine gender markers the moment someone's hair is short and their chest appears mostly flat ignores both the complexity of how humans perceive gender and how misogyny comes into play whenever a woman/perceived woman shows any masculinity let alone maleness. Considering the same misogyny comes into play frequently against trans women you'd think it'd be easy to remember.

This general sentiment of 'Being born with a vagina means your life is easy and everything you do will be loved and supported because society adores you. You don't and will never have any real problems, not like anyone born with a penis.' isn't magically okay and absolutely super different to when misogynists say it about cis women because you're using AGAB language and cite 'because you're men and blah blah patriarchy' as the actual reason you're saying it. It's very clearly same shit different coat of paint. The pool is there, your toes are in, stop preparing to dive for Gods sake.

#transandrophobia #anti transmasculinity #transgender

[eastgaysian]

Sorry this is a dumb question but can you explain why tomshiv is not abusive? Shiv seems to hit a lot of textbook behaviours of emotional abusers

thank you for your follow up clarifying this was in good faith bc i checked my inbox yesterday right after getting high and was like man come on. don't do this to me. but yeah i can talk about it, it's obviously something i have a fair amount of thoughts on

on a fundamental level, i take issue with the assertion that there are 'textbook behaviors of emotional abusers' in the first place. distilling abuse down to a set of behaviors is, imo, effectively meaningless and totally unproductive. it's not the behavior of an individual that defines abuse, it's a specific and intentionally cultivated imbalance of power and control within a relationship. victims of abuse can and do resort to survival mechanisms that could be considered in isolation as 'abusive behavior', the point is that you can't consider them in isolation. there's a gulf of difference between the same actions when they're coming from a person in a position of significant financial or physical or social power over someone else, or when they're coming from the person at a disadvantage.

i think viewing abuse as a set of behaviors also encourages you to treat interpersonal abuse as if it's discontinuous with systemic abuse, which is inaccurate and unproductive. a key part of succession's premise is that, because the family is literally the business, the familial abuse within the roy family is inextricable from the broader systems of capitalism, patriarchy, and the sexual violence and abuse endemic to them. with regards to how the show satirizes and critiques these systems, i think it's very telling that all of the characters are to some degree complicit and/or participants in abuse, but logan is the only one i'd say is unambiguously and intentionally presented as 'an abuser' (whose abuse is not an isolated product of him as a person, but integrated into/inseparable from the capitalist system which persists after his death). still, logan isn't reduced to a one-dimensional angry, abusive dad, he's given depth and complexity. his continued insistence that he loves his children isn't treated as something that's untrue, but that doesn't make it inherently good, and it certainly isn't incompatible with him abusing them.

circling back to tom and shiv. their relationship is unhealthy, it's not good for either of them to be married, shiv does fucking awful things to tom and tom does awful things right back, i'm not questioning any of that. but at my most cynical and bitchy, what it comes down to is quite simply: shiv doesn't have enough power over tom to be abusive, systemically or personally.

the thing is sometimes you see people say 'wow, if the genders were reversed people would say tom and shiv's relationship is unambiguously abusive!' which... hrm, but really the issue is that. the genders are the way they are, that's for a reason, and yes, that does make a significant difference in how we perceive their relationship and power dynamics. tom holds very real and present power over shiv as a man and as her husband, proposing to her when she was vulnerable in a way that placed huge pressure on her to accept and then trying to get her to have his baby so he can become patriarch. shiv's the heiress with the legitimacy of her family name and generational wealth but she is continuously, unavoidably subjected to gendered discrimination and violence. she's never allowed direct access to real power - she has to rely on the men around her, her husband or her brothers, and if they don't feel like humoring her she's shit out of luck.

this doesn't cancel out like a math equation, but it definitely makes things much more complicated than shiv being an Evil Bitch Wife to her Poor Pitiful Husband. when shiv finally does push tom too far, he immediately, successfully, goes over her head to her abusive father to fuck her over. maybe shiv wants to be her father in her relationships and exert the same kind of control he does. but she doesn't and she can't! she does not have that power! she cannot stop tom from kicking back and his hits are significant. as much as she might like to pretend otherwise, tom not only has always had the power to leave in a way shiv doesn't, he had and has the power to fuck her up badly, and he's used that power. that is simply not the power dynamic between abuser and victim to me.

i also have to say that abuse is not always going to be definitive black and white. in real life there are plenty of unambiguous situations but there are also plenty of complicated situations, and applying judgments to fiction is not always straightforward. i can't exactly call someone 'wrong' for personally being uncomfortable with tom and shiv's relationship or believing shiv is abusive, but i'm very skeptical of the viewpoint and the motivations or assumptions that are often contained within. if shiv is abusive, she definitely isn't uniquely so among the cast, so you had better be applying that label and any associated moral judgments equally across the board.

#mingbox #abuse mention #might self destruct this tag later but it's like. #my relationship with my ex was definitely unhealthy and fucked me up but it was not abusive because fundamentally. #he was actively worse to me than i was to him but the moment he went too far i cut him off and took all the friends in the divorce #if he had more influence in our social circle or could actually successfully emotionally manipulate me it would've been much worse #but he didn't so it wasn't. i won the idgaf wars and everyone liked me better because i am not an asshole so i peaced out. #he's a dickhead and i had to leave that relationship for my own good. still it was not abusive #chalkboard

[nyxreads]

I see alot of Elain stans wanting to read about soft female characters and that is why they love Elain as the next lead of the acotar book. I get it. Please don't misinterpret what I'm about to ask but soft girls are way too overrated. This is why men easily step on women, because women are too soft and can become a doormat. Elain is "too kind", "too forgiving", and some stans hate "girlboss" but did one of you pause and think that maybe the reason why some people like girls like Gwyn or Nesta is because they are the representation of women who stood up after centuries of patriarchy? Women aren't lesser. We love to read more girlboss characters in fantasy books because they empower us. Just some food for thoughts but I love Elain too, she can show more flavor in the next books

Hi anon,

First, I want to clarify to you that (imo, I can't speak for all) but Elain stans don't really hate badass characters. There's that. And I don't really think feminine women are overrated considering how characters like Elide, Yrene, Elain (at least in this fandom) are overlooked because well, they don't wield sword or isn't bitchy enough.

The thing here anon is, instead of women empowering women (may it be fictional or real) it became a competition. Of who's better, who can wield sword better, who can kill, who can say the last word, who's fit to have a love interest. It comes to the point where some women especially in this fandom look at characters like Elain and decides they are weak because they aren't the kind of women (as per to your own words) who stood up after centuries of patriarchy. Instead of uplifting every female characters, women started tearing female characters down that they deemed boring or unimportant in the series.

Anon, there is strength in gentleness. There is strength in forgiveness, in fact according to research people who forgives tend to live longer and their hearts healthier. Just because women are feminine doesn't mean we are lesser. We have a vital role in the society, and whoever sees feminine women as lesser, are the real lesser one. Because looking down at somebody because they don't meet your standard of strength shows insecurity.

Most women are feminine anon, I think it's time for us to stop demonizing femininity. Hollywood fooled us hard, let's open our eyes, this is why it's very important to also see characters such as Elain take the lead and have her own book.

There's enough representation of girlboss character in fantasy series, and I have no complaint in that. But there's also nothing wrong in embracing your feminine side and wanting to see a representation of it on fantasy books.

And let me tell you, irl, it's not women who held guns that helped on the war, it's the women most people sees as doormat. In fact, during the WWII, men underestimated these type of women and thought of them as fragile and helpless but they are spies, anon. They became a big weapon in war. Women are capable of anything despite of their trait. It's 2023 anon, let's stop underestimating women because of their gentleness or because of their hobbies and desires in life.

Stop tearing down women (fic or not). Just because you don't relate to them doesn't mean no one does. Every kind of women can be a main character.

And this is long enough but OMG (I am trying to be calm, really) stop looking down at my sweet girl! Lol okay bye.

#anon asks #feminine women in books #elain archeron #pro elain archeron #elriel

[redditreceipts]

i hope that whatever you write on here makes your life easier in some way. i don't know how, i just hope it does some good to someone somewhere. a lot of people are struggling right now, a lot of people are angry, and i know you're trying your best to make the world a better, safer place

it's strange how much kinship i feel with GCs on here. you're all screaming for safety, support for the next generation, an end to the oppression, an end to the patriarchy

we might be fighting on opposite sides- we've probably both seen some very different, very hard things. we've both a lot to the ways we have to live. i wish we could get along. i wish it didn't have to be this way

i won't argue that i'm a man despite my biology- not here anyway, there's no point, it won't achieve anything- but i hope you can find more friends like me and understand us better. we're not liars. we don't want to cause danger. i would beg you to listen to us but i understand that you can't.

i understand that you only hate trans women because a lot of men are total pieces of shit and don't care about anyone else. there's no point telling you that most trans women aren't bad. they're not good either. people just do what they do, both good and bad. nobody's perfect, and there are bad people in every area of society. Not all women are good. Goodness and womanhood are two different things.

i hope that your life gets better, and that your world gets bigger, and friendlier, and easier to be in.

-a trans brother

Hey :) thanks for the kind words, but don't you see how you sound kinda like one of these performatively compassionate preachers talking to atheists? something like "hey. I know that you've had it hard. Now it's difficult for you to let Jesus into your heart. You've turned your back to God because people have hurt you. I understand that. But some day, I hope, you will return to Him, because He has nothing but love for you."

And I also don't know where you get the notion that I don't have any trans friends or that I don't know trans people. I interact with trans people about four times a week. Half of the women I've dated have identified as something other than women. I also use preferred pronouns, as long as the person in question is not a total piece of shit.

It would actually kinda funny if we knew each other in real life, and you think that I'm some kind of super progressive person lmao.

And also, why do you think that saying that manhood or womanhood isn't determined by some nebulous non-falsifiable spiritual bullshit means that I hate trans women? Or that I think that all trans women are bad? Or that all biological females are good? I've literally never said that I think that all trans women are bad people. I just say that they are not women.

I also don't know where you get the notion that I think that trans people are lying. I actually think that the majority of trans-identified people actually believe that they are literally the opposite sex, just as the majority of catholics believe that they are literally recieving the body and the blood of Christ in their sermons. The only problem arises when people start to push their beliefs onto others. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs, but nobody is entitled to affirmation from the world around them.

#radical feminism #radblr #radical feminists please touch #radical feminists do interact #gender critical #feminism #terfblr #transbian #gender critical feminism #gender critical feminist #gc feminism #gc feminist #material reality #trans gender #trans man #transmasc #terfs please touch #terfs please interact

[girlyjesusfreak]

I don't consider myself a radical feminist anymore.

Not because I don't believe in misogyny, sexism and patriarchy; I still believe and agree on many points, about surrogacy, pornography, s3x 'work', etc but because first of all radical feminism refuses religions, especially the Abrahamic ones, and I'm a Catholic woman, second of all because the community is SO toxic. The guilt trip is too much, they tell you what to think, what to say, how to say something, you cannot have your own opinion on something just because it doesn't perfectly align with the whole ideology. Feminism isn't about hating men, it's definitely not about men, it's about women, so I don't understand why they make it all about hating men, or picking up fights with men for stupid things. It's too extreme for me, I know a radical feminist in real life who thinks that babies could be made only by women without the "help" from any man, like babies made in labs, with only female cells, she doesn't think that a father isn't so important. Well he is, as someone who couldn't have a father because the Lord decided that his time was over, the father figure is important, I've struggled and still struggle everyday because of this missing figure during all my life, and I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one who can confirm this. If babies come from a man and a woman there's a reason, women and men complete each other, the kids should have the possibility to have both sides of the medal, both sexes with their differences. You cannot private a kid of any important figure from their life. It's just selfish. She also makes me feel judged and insecure because I enjoy doing my make up, my hair and I shave. I don't care if someone shaves or not shaves their legs, but I obviously have a hormonal problem (I should get it checked 😭) and she had definitely much less hair than me, her hairs aren't even visible so it doesn't change for her, I need to get mine removed with the laser because they because a real issue for me, like socially.

Many feminists claim that men and women shouldn't shame women but often they're the first ones to do it. Actual feminism, in my opinion, isn't to denigrate women who don't agree with you or feel pity for them, it's about helping and supporting.

Another one said that whoever decides to have babies is selfish, not because of the uncertain future, but because having sex with a man or being impregnated by a man is misogynistic and because babies are a parassite or something stupid stuff. She said that, for a woman, having sex with a man is degratory and humiliating.

Another one said that veterans deserve all their PTSD, like are you human? Do you feel empathy? What the hell...

I don't wanna be considered part of a community where people say those things, I don't wanna be associated with them.

Many women in 3rd World countries are dying, being r4ped, molested and what western feminists care about is a 12 years old boy who makes a dumb comment on an Instagram reel? C'mon.

I've noticed that many so self called radfems only care about the "trans issue", don't get me wrong, I'm gender critical myself but it's not the only point of radical feminism, it's not the only topic. Being transphobic and being gender critical are two different things and I think that many people choose to use the term 'radfem' to cover their blatant hate. Knowing that biology is an objective reality and hating someone just because they suffer from gender dysphoria are two different things. As a Christian I try not to hate or judge, I try my best at least.

Also women who actually helped and cared about women didn't care about calling themselves "feminists", that's pretty prideful if you think about it. But that's just my opinion. I think that the term "feminist" should be earned.

I hope that this doesn't bother any feminist, it's just my self reflecting opinion.

That's all.

🩷

#feminism #radical feminism #christianity #catholic #roman catholic #christian faith #religion #spirituality

[academicdisasterfic]

The Laws of Fandom Protect Whiteness.

Disclaimer: I do think that fandom only works if people stick to the Three Laws of Fandom, i.e. SALS, DL;DR, and YKINMK. I am anti-anti and I believe that writing problematic things does not make you problematic in real life. Basically: I'm on your side, fellow fic writers.

But there is a caveat. We have to remember why the Three Laws exist. They are there so that fandom is a safe space for everyone. So it can be a place we all come to and feel respected and heard. But this undoubtedly privileges White people.

The Three Laws of Fandom will inherently protect White people's safety because we don't have to worry about unconscious bias or racist conditioning towards our race or ethnicity. The Three Laws of Fandom do not inherently protect People of Colour because White people in fandom will have forms of racist bias that we have to unlearn. Therefore, the Laws only work if White people choose to be actively anti-racist and listen to POC in the fandom.

Let's expand on this.

This is not saying that writing racism, or writing racially-charged themes, should be censored or off-limits to White people. But when we do write them, we need to remember that the Laws also only work because fandom operates on a comprehensive tagging system. We are able to enforce DL;DR because we have tags showing us exactly what is in the fic. Therefore - don't like age difference? Don't like non-con? Don't like violence? You can opt out!

But if you write racially-charged themes and don't give appropriate content warnings, then you aren't giving POC the chance to opt out. In fact, you are endangering their mental and emotional safety by pulling them into subject matter that has real-world implications for them. And yes, entering fiction always carries a risk of reading something that you don't like - but is far more dangerous for POC than for White people.

It is one thing to accidentally read a fic that depicts a kink you don't like, it is another for a POC to read their own experiences being depicted in a way that makes them out to be no big deal, and not even a big enough deal to be appropriately tagged.

It is also important to note that a POC alerting you to racist themes or passages in your work and asking you to appropriately tag or consider the way you wrote them isn't the same as them flaming you. In fact, it shows care. This person thinks that you are worth their time and effort to try and have a conversation with. If you shut that down and prioritise your right to write anything you want above someone's safety, that is a racist act.

This type of racism results in people like Stitch's Media Mix taking a hard line against the Laws altogether, as they are so regularly used as excuses by White people to justify racism. While I disagree with Stitch's ultimate conclusion, can I blame her for how they got there? The Laws have certainly never been leveraged against me to dismiss my lived experience or concerns, and have only contributed to fandom being a safer space for me. But Stitch is Black and speaks about antiblackness and racism in fandom - and gets barrages of death threats and hate mail for doing so, from fans participating in these spaces.

How are we supposed to tell POC that the Laws keep their spaces safe when they so clearly do not?

On a related note, I think the prioritisation of ✨positivity✨ over any sort of critique or conversation is another mechanism to protect Whiteness. It's important to remember that particularly in slash fandoms, the majority of fans tend to be white queer AFABs or genderqueer people, so the normal structures of patriarchy and heteronormativity that we navigate in our regular lives don't enter into fandom as pervasively. Whiteness, however, is the oppressive structure that tends to persist in slash fandoms, and therefore we need to be cognisant of how this can marginalise and isolate POC fans.

If you avoid difficult, race-based conversations because you only spread "positivity", then you do not actually care about everyone in fandom having a positive experience.

Paraphrasing from 'Conflict is Not Abuse' by Sarah Schulman, conflict isn't inherently bad. It's productive. It shows care. It's growth.

The Laws of Fandom can and should work for everyone. But we are the actual enforcers. We have to recognise the potential ways people can abuse the Laws to marginalise, threaten and isolate POC fans.

People of Colour deserve a seat at the table of fandom. They deserve a safe space. They deserve to feel wanted and seen and respected.

I don't have all the solutions for this - I'm White and recognise that everything I'm saying here I only learned from POC and have probably not said it as well or as eloquently as they have been doing (but no one's listening). I welcome any additions, critiques or insights from POC to this post.

The type of fandom I want to cultivate is safe and inclusive for everyone, and we need to start thinking about what that actually means.

#fandom #hp fandom #drarry #laws of fandom #sals #dl;dr #ykinmk #anti anti #antiracism

[jilyandbambi]

the people who are pissed at Natalie's death and writing off the show bc it turns out the point of Yellowjackets wasn't some 3rd wave feminist #yas queen parable about rejecting societal norms and finding true freedom in the woods remind me of the annoying Intro to Womens Studies nerds who interpret the ending of The VVitch--y'know the movie where a malevolent entity uses starvation and grief to destroy the minds of an entire family so that he can isolate and sexually enslave the isolated & devastated eldest daughter for eternity--as a cathartic feminist metaphor.

people, the principal says it in the first minutes of the show: "all i know is that what happened was a tragedy. A terrible tragedy."

A. TRAGEDY.

because the Yellowjackets worked their asses off to get to Nationals. It was the biggest moment of their lives. They LOVED soccer. They were FREAKING PUMPED to get to Seattle and win the title. This was their DREAM.

because Jackie was a happy, perky kid from suburbia who was looking forward to going to college with her best friend. who found something to love about literally everyone but was doomed because you can't rally a starving team with a rousing speech and an ice breaker

because Shauna was going to go to Brown and grow up and find the confidence to be HERSELF instead of Jackie's best friend. And then she and Jackie have a fight and Jackie dies because of Shauna's betrayal, Shauna's jealousy, Shauna Shauna Shauna. Jackie will be a child forever because of Shauna, so how could Shauna dare grow up? She can't put her grief to rest because Jackie was never laid to rest because of Shauna. So Shauna comes out of the wilderness and marries Jackie's boyfriend and has Jackie's child and gets older year after year but never grows up because one night when she was 17 and scared she and Jackie had a fight and Shauna waited until the morning to say "I'm sorry."

because Taissa had a plan, had goals, had a future already mapped out. Nationals. Howard. Law school. Becoming a hot-shot NY lawyer. Because she got out of the wilderness and kept chugging along with The Plan because she HAD TO. But none of it is real to Taissa because you can't live and be numb, and Taissa has to be numb because if she lets herself celebrate the wins that she managed to swim while her fellow survivors sank, she’d have to remember that she too killed and ate her friends to get there. And Taissa--so distressed by what they did to Jackie she dissociated into amnesia--can't accept that, can't have that be who she is because it would ruin everything she wanted for herself. And then it's all ruined anyway.

because Lotte was a girl with psychic powers AND schizophrenia. She needed her meds!! Stopping treatment cold turkey is painful, disorienting, and SCARY, she needed support, she needed someone to tell her what was real and what wasn't because without her meds it was impossible for her to discern for herself. She needed support but got made into a god instead. And now a false prophet is all she knows how to be.

You get the idea.

The Yellowjackets didn't find freedom from society and the chains of the patriarchy when their plane crashed. They found starvation and guilt and loss and pain. The wilderness isn't a god of decadence and pleasure and ecstasy. It takes more than it gives. The team got to survive in exchange for slavish devotion and grief, and their childhoods, their dreams, their achievements, the people they loved more than themselves, the lives they’d been perfectly happy to keep on living.

They get rescued, go home, and grow into fractured adults who all, to varying degrees, actively make their lives worse because functionally, they're still scared, guilt-ridden kids lost in the woods who know no matter what that nothing will ever be okay again.

NONE OF THEM are glad that this happened. NOT ONCE does anyone say, "You know I'm grateful for this awful traumatizing experience because without it, I never would've [X,Y,Z]" NOT EVEN MISTY, who broke the transmitter so she could have friends for 5 more minutes. THIS SHOULD TELL YOU SOMETHING.

Yellowjackets is a TRAH-JAH--DEE.

#yellowjackets #yellowjackets spoilers #yellowjackets meta #yall are on my nerves #you saw some teens playing dress up and making out in the woods #and thought you were getting sisterhood of the traveling antler mask? #little women but in the 90s and with cannibalism? #bitches will say 'nothing u learn in school will ever matter' #and lack the ability to correctly interpret the basic surface-level themes of a 1hr program #WE GET IT u read The Song of Achilles during English instead of participating in the class discussion on 1984 #but now look where u are

[y2ksnowglobe]

Deep appreciation for episode 30 (Van on the Run)

This is a long post where I just ramble on all the moments that make me love this episode.

The dethroning of fleshlight tag as the worst thing that anyone ever said.

The "Hey Andrew" story

Big old butt crack down the middle of the orb

Terry Jr. asking why Ron isn't wearing pants

"I'd better write that down as a note. Terry Jr., easy to lie to."

Lark literally taking a note about how unpaid interns die sometimes. (This turns into my firm belief that Mae Hailes is a paid intern)

Ron insisting Paeden is his half-brother. "My dad is my dad too!"

just gonna weep and tear my hair out real quick over that one.

Ron's insights on the patriarchy

"My stepson is here, and I am looking at him in the eye right now and it's not weird at all. It's not weird. We're just making eye contact right here." "It's a little weird. You have not blinked in several minutes." "Now it hurts to blink, so I'm not going to ever…" "That's not how it works. You have to blink." "No. It's like my eyes are getting…" "Dad, blink." Like what a way to start normalizing Terry Jr. calling Ron "Dad"

Sparrow's stealth hug

Just...starting to really see the dead inside Grant is both heartbreaking and really funny.

Nick's shaky fist bump makes me wanna cry.

I am always there for a good low perception roll joke.

Reveal that Ron just carries to lure that killed Willy around with him.

"Yeah! Your dad is George Washington!"

THEORY TIME: Like this episode is where we get most of our information about the kids' time in Ravenloft, and like...I don't buy it. Looking at how the kids phrase things, I've been solidly convinced that the O-Dads have Geas'ed the hell out of these kids so they can't give any specific details about what was done to them, but I feel like there's a loophole where they can talk about things that weren't done. So, for example: Nick specifies that Bill ignored him. I'll keep coming back to this as we keep going.

Weird detail: Darryl is with Glenn on the murder Henry's dad train at the start.

God I love to hate Barry Oak so much, he makes me skin crawl and he is in top form in this episode.

"I AM DRIVING WITH MY FRIENDS, FATHER! I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER!" It's such a teenager-y thing to say and I feel like it really gives a snapshot into what their relationship was like back in the day.

I really wanna get a snapshot into Nick's mind as he hears his dad completely lose his cool about Barry. Like, my boy did such a good job trying to act unbothered and brave, and then Glenn just is deeply and visibly upset about Barry almost killing him (which is valid, I just feel like it's a new experience for Nick)

Lark and Sparrow jumping in to drive when Henry lets go of the wheel. Like, not sure what happened with Sparrow, but Lark has been an epic driver from the get-go.

ANOTHER THEORY: Sparrow is really interesting in this episode. He willingly covers his ears when asked by Henry, and he's the one who hits the brakes when Henry tells them to stop the car. He's also just weirdly chill and forgiving, and like...I do not buy this as love wolf shit, he is clearly under some kind of magical influence to make him more compliant. You do not get the Sparrow that looks scared in the drone footage in episode 28 to this remarkably chill and forgiving kid without magical interference.

Freddie putting his foot down that Glenn would not mess with firearms while drunk

Barry's "Oh kakaw kakaw" when he's shot is probably in my top ten vocal stims from this show.

Lark enthusiastically supporting Glenn shooting Barry makes me so happy

Henry going from trying to be firm and calm as Glenn loses his shit, and immediately shifting to "ooooh, I hate you so much" as soon as Barry starts talking to him is so funny. Just all the ideals fly out the window.

Find it super interesting how Henry cites "respecting his choices" as a thing here considering what happens later on with the bracelets.

I both do and don't want to know if Anthony already had the idea for the Lark and Sparrow homunculi when Barry offers letting Henry take his kids and run and giving up all the other kids. Like regardless of whether or not it was planned, I do love the idea that Barry is giving this offer because he knows he's got the real ones tucked back in Oakvale.

I love the word abscond, okay?

Love Barry framing his failure as a father as disappointment in Henry's choices. I want to kick him in the face.

Mr. Mustache calling Ron "Honey"

"No. You just exasperatedly asked why a bunch of times. A.k.a. the Henry Oak special."

Geas theory follow up: Lark telling them they forgot to feed them fits into the loophole of being something the granddads didn't do, so they're allowed to mention it. Also this part of starting to hint at what exactly went down is so just *chefs kiss.*

Freddie's "WHY?" When Matt asks if Darryl can perceive that Ron peed his pants.

Freddie being told the charm needs to be in an enclosed space and immediately going "What if we had an umbrella?"

Freddie picking the first audio result for Fantasy Tavern for the sound.

"Bring us your hottest moms!"

This next bit always slays me and I don't even know why:

The jokes about the level one adventurer group is beautiful. I hope things turned out okay for that fighter and four rogues.

Henry making up Mr. X only for Mr. X to be real.

Ron thoroughly describing the fake voice he's going to do, only to reveal it's just his normal voice.

Ron's whole exchange with the other rogues.

Henry describing Glenn's fantasy voice as Italian

Anthony trying to keep up with what the crew are trying to do as they're attempting to get a room.

Also, everything is in shillings now for no adequately explained reason?

The random bar patrons who are gonna be so disappointed when they make it to the other side of town to find out that Hi I'm Ron is not playing.

The start of the NPCs realizing they could have asked for more money gag.

Glenn almost going to see what's up with Mr. X but then getting bored.

Anthony doing a C3P0 impression

Geas Theory update: Grant phrases it as "they weren't nice" and the most detail we get from Grant is that "Willy's really mean" only for him to then say, "It was fine, I guess." Terry tops out at saying that Willy "shouted at them a fair number of times" and that's as intense as any of their descriptions get. Like this is sus as heck. Especially since at minimum, we know that Lark and Sparrow got homunclui'd and that somehow, Barry got the twins to sit quietly. The boys are underselling this and the only one that would be in character for would be like...Nick (who we already saw was super shaky). Darryl even prompts Grant saying it's okay if it was rough and they were scared and we still get no further information.

Ron's scary story is so good for so many reasons. Like the way he tries to make it spookier by making Willy a man with a fishingpole for an arm, by calling fish "food that breathes underwater" like that mixed with the realization that he's telling the story of how Willy died is just...an excellent combo of scary and not scary and it's just a baffling bunch of weird that is pure Ron.

Terry being baffled by Ron asking if they want to sing Rock-a-bye Baby, only for it to turn out Ron doesn't know the words.

"You find more knives than not knife in his pants."

The fact that Lark was smuggling knives for a breakout attempt is just so lovely, go off my murderous little weirdo.

Also seeing Henry taking weapons from his kids knowing where this ends up is just (collapses into a ball of sad)

Henry deflecting from the werewolf questions by just switching to the topic of puberty, only for Sparrow to be too receptive to wanting to learn.

Darryl overhearing Paeden saying that Grant's dad is cool only for Grant to not say anything in response.

"Did Ron kill his dad?"

Seeing Darryl be actually upset about the fact that he's the only one who'd want to see his dad, but his dad's not there. And seeing Darryl actually grapple with the idea that he doesn't understand Glenn, Henry, and Ron's relationships with their dads, and like the weird feeling of not being able to relate being isolating, but still realizing it's an isolation you should be thankful for.

Ghost football ft. George Washington and one of his slaves

"Dude, that was the entire snarling id of the American masculine psyche in one image…It was like football, George Washington, your dad, and the Sword of Damocles that is slavery."

Glenn in the dream space

Bill Close calling Glenn tiger is just like such a small detail but it's like one of those moments that we really can actually see him being a dad, I think?

The gut punch of "Do you love me?" and "You wake up." like God DAMN!!!!!

Like this episode is such a buffet of character dynamics, and jokes, and lore, and room for theories, and I LOVE IT SO MUCH!!!! WHY DID IT TAKE ME SO LONG TO REALIZE IT'S MY FAVORITE????????

#dndads #dungeons and daddies #ron stampler #willy stampler #bill close #glenn close dndads #darryl wilson #paeden bennetts #grant wilson #henry oak #sparrow oak #lark oak #terry jr. stampler #nick close #barry oak

[attonitos-gloria]

jb for the ship asks?

jaime and brienne are truly a breaking of fourth wall. it is george turning to his audience and going "you DO get what is going on in this world, don't you? tell me you get it." he does that with tyrion in ADWD, too, and i just love it when george goes meta.

i think they are the most romantic thing to ever happen in asoiaf because of the way they are the embodiment of the true problem of love and courtly romance in westeros which is patriarchy and misogyny and the absolutely insane cages of gender these characters are in. it's very hard for me to get jaime and brienne without jaime and cersei as contrast. this is a jaime/brienne/cersei situation.

what if you grew up as a man, believing you were born to reclaim the fate of a true man - knighthood and glory - and it turns out in real life this just means violence and bloodshed. what if you cope with the horrors of feudalism and patriarchy by blending into one single golden unit with your twin sister who is you who are your sister and that goes on forever. what if you fed each other's cruelty, and bred monsters into the world, and death, and it's all perfect and golden because you're each other's reflection.

what if you often thought if you were a woman you'd be your sister because who else could you possibly be - but of course you'd never be a woman hahahaha this is crazy. of course you are not a woman. (but your sister is, and your sister is you. so what does that even mean? you never think about it, you just disappear inside.) what if your sister is trapped in a house of violence you can only bear witness to, but do nothing about, even with the sword in hand and a white cloak around your shoulders, because this is the fate of all women - marriage and motherhood at whatever cost. what if this isn't even the first time you bear witness to a king being violent to a queen in this same castle in this same bedroom. and your sister thinks if she were a man she'd be you but hahahahah this is crazy, obviously, of course your sister is not a man. (but you are a man and you are your sister. and she is being sacrificed in the altar of gender conformity that is monarchy and you are standing by the door because you are a man and you are a knight - you are thinking, what does that even mean? you disappear inside again.)

what if you believe this is really all there is to being a knight, to being a man, to being a person?

and then what if you meet a woman who is, as far as you can understand it, a better man than you: by being a better knight, by simply being a better human being?

pairing of all time. they don't even need to fuck for it to be real. i think there's a undertone of tragedy in them - i can't imagine jaime ending this series as a happily married man to brienne, i don't even know if both of them will survive, but like. i'm not expecting the next books for them to be canon because in my head jaime and brienne are already a canon relationship of true courtly romance.

(Post edit: might be the reason why I usually don't read fluffy fanfiction of them because it often goes the way of... they will get married and have babies and rule casterly rock together! and while I think it's okay to forge happy endings for beloved characters - i'm a sansa/tyrion shipper, i do this all the time lol - i think there is something apocalyptic about this ship. Like they have the power to ruin this system. Spiritually. I mean, i still read braime fic because the writers are just too good but. I like endings when one of them die. Or jaime goes to the Wall! I like this one too. Or at least they escape Westeros together lol anyway. It is also why i'm also EXTREMELY wary of some jaime ships who just play harder into the gender conformity that i think jaime and brienne are, canonically, breaking and ruining.)

so. basically there is no one else for jaime and brienne but jaime and brienne themselves. perfect pairing. i'd say maybe the only canon pairing ever

#otp: curse me or kiss me #jaime x brienne #braime

[hadeantaiga]

"Stop telling people to encourage the cop inside their head...you do not need to be careful" "I can write tentacle noncon of my favorite character all day long" Ahh. It's always about finding ways to justify rape, isn't it? Fantasizing about rape absolutely makes you a bad person, and definitely tells a lot about your character. If you can masturbate to it, you're definitely okay with it to some degree. Studies show men exposed to rape porn are more likely to believe women enjoy rape and that it's not that big of a crime, especially if the victim shows a positive reaction to it. Fictional acting doesn't change the fact that your orgasm is real. These things DO affect real life. So pathetic.

"Fantasizing about rape absolutely makes you a bad person."

No it doesn't. Thoughtcrime is not real. I just imagined a random person getting stabbed right now, just to do it. Didn't make me a bad person.

I see you quote studies about cis men watching rape fantasy porn. But did you know that the women in those videos aren't actually being raped? They are actresses. They are playing a role. I notice you also don't cite any studies about cis women who enjoy rape fantasies. Do the studies show that these women also think real-life rape victims secretly enjoy being raped? And how do those numbers change when you involve trans people, including binary and nonbinary trans people?

I'm sorry but statistics about a single demographic of humans just isn't very convincing to me, especially when that demographic is cis men. Y'all always act like they are the only demographic that matters when it comes to sexual fantasy, and that's super weird to me.

And I'd argue that the idea that real-life women secretly like being raped is not caused by porn, but that the trope itself is a symptom of the patriarchy. That said, I don't think rape fantasies would disappear if the patriarchy disappeared. Because again, "this woman secretly enjoyed being raped and ravaged" is not exclusive to porn catered towards cis men. It's literally an entire romance novel genre written by and catered towards women. In this case, the reader is placing herself not in the position of the offender, but that of the victim. One could argue that these novels, because they reveal the inner thoughts of the character and how much she's actually enjoying the rape, are even more harmful than porn movies, since at least in the movie, we aren't 100% sure if the character the porn actress is playing is actually enjoying it, since we're not privy to the character's thoughts.

Hey - do you like horror movies? Do you think the writers, directors, crew, and actors are trying to justify violence? Do you think the people who made Friday the 13th all want to murder teenagers at campgrounds? Do you think the fans who watch these movies and delight in the violence and laugh at it are all secretly serial killers? Because I don't know if you're aware of this, but horror movies are very fun, and audience members do typically enjoy the murders.

What about the hit TV show Hannibal? Do you think the people who made it think cannibalism is ok? The show really glorifies cannibalism, rolls it up in a mixture of horror, eroticism and elegance. The main character Will is an incredibly unreliable narrator with regards to Hannibal, because he's partly in love with Hannibal, partly terrified of him, and literally suffering from a brain fever half of one of the seasons. But you're supposed to root for them anyway, you're supposed to be so swept up in their fucked up romance that when Will "betrays" Hannibal, you're supposed to feel heartbreak, and when they finally murder someone together and then plunge off a cliff in blood-soaked ecstasy, that's supposed to be a moment of elated victory.

What about Oldboy? You must HATE this movie - it depicts alcoholism, kidnapping, mind control, and torture. Oh yeah and incest. Is Oldboy trying to justify incest? The ending is kinda vague on what happens to the two main characters, after all.

What about action movies where the hero kills dozens or maybe hundreds of nameless characters on his way to kill the main villain? Are those movies trying to justify violence? They're definitely glorifying the violence.

And me? My noncon fanfic? I'm afab. I still identify as female. I've been into noncon since long before I came out as transmasc. I was finding things like men being tied up fascinating even in my teens, before I ever learned what bondage was.

There was a statue of some colonial guy with his hands tied behind his back in a museum. I stared at that statue for a really long time. Another time during this same age, we watched a Zorro movie, and Zorro was standing there very heroically, all tied up, and I found the scene very moving. Then, again in high school, a buddy was playing Metal Gear Solid. At one point in that game, a robot with long tentacle-like robot arms grabs one of the main characters, Raiden, and squeezes him and thrashes him around a bit. This time, the feelings I felt were definitely erotic.

I had never seen porn at that age. I did not know what bondage was. I didn't know BDSM was a thing. But I still, naturally, all on my own, found bondage erotic - and bondage can have elements of noncon to it. It certainly did in the fantasies I was experiencing. That's because these fantasies and kinks are natural human things. It is NORMAL to find this shit erotic.

Now. If you're watching porn that features rape fantasies and you start to believe that real-life people might secretly enjoy actually being raped, then you need to stop watching that kind of porn. But that applies to anything. If you watch a bunch of horror movies and start to think that maybe, murder is actually good, then you should probably stop watching horror movies. I'm not saying media can't affect people. But I AM saying that's not something that happens to everyone, and I am saying that most people are fully capable of consuming media in responsible ways.

Fictional rape is not about real people. I absolutely do want to justify the continuation of fictional depictions of the taboo and the forbidden, because these are perfectly normal fantasies that humans have had probably for our entire existence.

#tw noncon mention #tw rape mention

[booksandpaperss]

some ramble-y thoughts on men's social isolation and women's safety bc this has been on my mind for a bit

I do think it's really sad how men end up feeling so isolated bc of various social expectations as well as people being cruel, but as a fem presenting person I have to say that you can't just expect women and anyone who is fem presenting to just "start being nicer". ive seen a few posts on Tumblr essentially stating that but I have to reiterate it is about safety. I literally cannot afford to stop looking at men with caution and assumed violence until I get to know them really well bc if I stop that could genuinely cost me me life. its true that most men I see probably are not predators and im sure it hurts to be perceived that way, but I have no way of being able to tell who is and isn't going to harm me. I have to assume the worst because it is the only way I can stay safe.

it sucks, it really does, for all parties involved. I have so much sympathy for the men who are genuinely kind and would never hurt me that feel isolated, it isn't fair, and I myself certainly don't enjoy the *necessary* fear that the random guy im passing on the street could see me and decide to hurt me, but this is the reality of the world. there is no easy solution, but what certainly isn't a solution is expecting women to start being kinder to men they dont know because once again: that could genuinely cost someone their life.

The best solution right now I think is to continue to try to deconstruct misogyny and gender roles, and that takes time, patience, and understanding.

I have also seen the notion on here that men feeling isolated socially is misandry, but the reality is that misandry is simply not real on a systemic scale. men feeling isolated is a direct result of the patriarchy and a side affect of misogyny. a lot of things on this website that are perceived as misandry are either not real problems or they are but they're just the impacts of misogyny and the gender roles that come with it.

But it is very surreal to be walking alone at night, clutching my pepper spray and glaring whenever a man I don't know is near me, making sure to stay next to the street and make it obvious I know exactly where I'm going and still feeling the fear that it might not be enough and something horrible could happen to me anyway, only come back to Tumblr and see people saying misandry is just as prevalent as misogyny and women need to start considering how it feels for men to be looked at like they're predators. Touch grass seems like an applicable statement here.

oh and obligatory piss on the poor tumblr disclaimer: I know I am using binary terms so before any of you get on your high horse about it, I myself am non binary. I am not actually a woman, but I certainly look like one and therefore deal with misogyny. I fully understand that trans men and genderqueers of all kinds as well as even feminine cis men also fear for their life on the street so dont even think abt getting on my ass about that. oh and if any of you try to call this a terf post consider yourself blocked with a recommendation to get a refresh on what terf actually means instead of just throwing around the term when you see any post trying to talk about misogyny :D

final disclaimer bc I wanna cover all my bases due to Tumblr reading comprehension: im aware topics like this are very nuanced with lots of layers, please dont act like im obligated to cover all that in a random Tumblr post of all things, I cannot possibly cover everything nor am I obligated to. I simply wanted to remind ppl that actual lives are at risk and fem presenting people constantly and regularly fear for their life bc I feel like that gets left out a lot in conversations like this on here. <3

#elli's random thoughts #women's safety #mens mental health #feminism #no idea what else to tag this so im just gonna throw it into the void #plus I do not want this to end up getting around to actual terf blogs ugh