#private Jonas // chickens

[scribblesofagoonerr]

God loves a trier though, right? | Inner Demons

⟫ Alphabet Challenge, G - God loves a trier though, right?

Pairings: leah williamson x teen reader, arsenal wfc x teen reader

Hi, sorry for the wait on this. This is a bit scrappy, not been proofread at all and I'm currently battling a headache while writing this so apologies if it doesn't make much sense, like at all!

I'm overwhelmed by the amount of support on this. It's definitely become one of my favourite things to write!

As always, my asks are open for anyone to drop me any ideas’ on this fic or anything else that people would like to see be written, however, I am only comfortable writing anything platonic though :)

Reader returns from the hospital, which leads to a heart-to-heart with some usual classic teenage sarcasm.

TW: heavy angst and mentions of SH, MH, suicide and death.

"Home sweet home" Leah pulls the car into the driveway and turns off the ignition, turning to look at you.

You fake a smile in the blonde's direction as you tug at the sleeves of your hoodie to fight the urge. "Glad to be home" You speak quietly.

You knew going home wasn't going to be as easy as you thought it would be, the reminder was right there in front of you.

A reminder of what you did, what could have been your end.

Until Leah had walked in and saved you.

You didn't really want to die, the voices on the internet were just too much to deal with.

The hate from the fans. The pressure from the media.

At times, everything can be overwhelming. But, being home makes it easier to regain control of being able to hurt yourself.

If you're being honest, that really does scare you.

The vague memory from that night still haunts you as you walk through the flat, sending a chill up your spine.

"Bubs?" Leah calls out to you, as she watches you freeze as you pass the bathroom.

"Uh, I'm... I'm a bit tired. Think I'm gonna have a nap" You tell her, slowly moving in the direction of your bedroom.

"Alright, I'll go and cook us some dinner. I doubt you've eaten much in the last few days if hospital food is anything to go by huh?" Leah jokes as she presses a light kiss to the top of your head. "Have a good nap, I'll wake you up when it's ready, yeah?" She adds.

Slumping into your own space, you glance around your bedrom and you're glad to see it's exactly how you left it.

You had missed your private space when you was in the hospital and you're just glad enough that the blonde hadn't gone to the extreme measures of removing your bedroom door at least.

"So the girls wanted to come around tonight but I thought it was best to hold off for now" Leah slides the dinner plate in front of you, you can't help but smile when you see it's smiley faces and nuggets.

One of the only things that Leah can actually cook.

You actually missed the small things like that while you were on an extended stay in the hospital.

"Sure" You agree as you reach for the ketchup bottle and squeeze a decent amount on your plate. "I'll be able to see them tomorrow at training, won't I?" You ask.

"Bubs" You can tell Leah is cautious to speak.

"I can train, can't I?" You look directly at the blonde as you await her answer.

Although you have a feeling that you're going to be sitting on the sidelines for a while.

"I have to train, Le! I can't put it off. I've gotta be ready to be selected for the matchday squad!" You insist as you stab your fork into a chicken nugget.

You watch as Leah frowns and hesitates to speak and that confirms your thoughts about it.

"We have a meeting tomorrow with Jonas, Kim, and some of the other staff at the club to discuss things--" Leah begins to explain, starting to eat her own dinner.

"I'm being sidelined?!" You interject in disbelief.

Leah shakes her head as she swallows her food before she speaks. "I didn't say that, Y/N" She states.

You can't help but scoff. "But you sort of did. I can't be sat on the bench-- I can't do it!" You try to insist. "I... I need some kind of purpose. I need a reason to get up in the morning!" You fight back the tears that threaten to spill.

You have to play. You have to be able to do that. You can't have that taken away from you.

"Bubs, let's just see what is said tomorrow. Okay?" Leah frowns and tries to take hold of your hand as you snatch it back.

"I have to be on the pitch, Leah. I can't be sidelined. I... I just can't do it" You state as you push your chair back and bolt up from the table.

"Where are you going?" Leah asks, confused.

"I need to get out. I'm going for a walk, or is that not allowed now?" You sneer as you move to walk over to the coat rack and grab one of your jackets.

"I'll come with you" Leah stands up from the table.

You huff and roll your eyes. "I don't need to be monitored. I want to be alone" You all but plead with her.

"I... I can't let you do that. You know I can't" Leah shakes her head in disagreement. "So we either go for a walk together, or we don't go at all" She states sternly.

"Guess we're both going then, wonderful" You mumble sarcastically and shove a pair of trainers on.

"It's cold out here this evening" Leah mumbles as she tries to pull her jacket more around to try and get warm, you decide to take a walk alongside the canal not too far away from the flat as you always thought clearer when you were near water.

"You didn't have to come with me" You mutter as you keep your hands shoved in your pockets.

You'd never been too much of a fan of the cold, but you just needed an escape as you felt like the walls were caving in around you being inside the flat.

"You know that I did" Leah replies quietly, exhaling a sigh.

"Oh yeah, of course, that's cos' I'm on suicide watch, right?" You can't help but joke with the blonde.

Leah tenses up at the mention of the subject that's joked about so casually as the two of you walk alongside the canal.

The blonde can't help but try and reach for your bicep to try and pull you away from being too near to the edge of the water.

"You can relax a bit Le, I'm not gonna try and off myself again" You continue to crack jokes about death like you're talking about the weather. "Although jumping into the water seems like a great idea" You add.

The blonde clicks her tongue. "I wish you wouldn't say things like that sometimes" She states in disagreement as she hesitantly looks at the water, trying to pull you back from the edge.

"It's the easier coping method" You quietly admit as you shrug your shoulders as you linger dangerously close to the edge of the water. "How deep do you think it is?" You ask, looking in the direction of the blonde.

"Come away from the water" Leah tries to pull you away from the edge again.

"Why? Afraid I'll actually jump in" You fire back as you can't help but laugh slightly. "You know I can swim, right?" You ask her.

"I know you can swim, but..." Leah looks nervous as she eyes your every move.

"But you think I'd rather try and purposely drown instead?" You wonder, already knowing her answer.

Leah shakes her head and exhales a sigh. "Y/N" She states in a knowing tone of voice that you knew all too well.

"The pressure is too much sometimes, the media... They can be ruthless" You admit quietly, looking back out to the water in front of you.

"I know" Leah replies just as quiet, waiting for you to speak again.

You tug at the sleeves of your hoodie and bite your bottom lip. "It's all too much sometimes. Sometimes I think the world is against me" You tell her, honestly.

"Bubs..." Leah starts to speak.

"Why were you and Katie fighting when I was in the hospital?" You change the subject, refusing to let your vulnerability show.

Leah exhales another sigh. "It's complicated" She says.

"Bullshit" You can't help but scoff and roll your eyes.

"Language" The blonde scolds.

"Well, why aren't you?" You repeat the question, wanting to know the answer.

"Well, adults have disagreements sometimes" Leah states, looking out to the water.

You resist the urge to roll your eyes. "C'mon Le, I'm a not naive kid-- Why're you not getting along?" You feel like you're constantly repeating yourself right now.

Leah exhales a sigh and hesitates to speak. "She just thinks that my decision was wrong, to allow the doctors to detain you in the hospital" She explains.

"I know that. You guys were literally fighting about it right in front of me" You remind her with the usual teenage cocky attitude you have.

"She thinks you should've been at home instead, with all of us watching out for you" The blonde defender continues to explain. "But Y/N... I don't know how I can keep you safe when you're at home. You joke about death so casually, I'm so scared that I am going to have to leave you alone, that when I come home, I'll find you lying dead on the floor in a pool of your own blood. At... At least this way when you were in the hospital, I knew you were safe and you couldn't hurt yourself" She confesses the truth.

The truth that leaves an eerie silence.

"I knew you were safe and you couldn't hurt yourself" Her words were like a continuous loop in your head.

Her confession hits you suddenly, leaving you feeling numb.

#woso x reader #arsenal x reader #woso #woso fanfics #leah williamson x reader #leah williamson #woso imagine #heavy angst #woso one shot #awfc x reader #arsenal x teen!reader #leah williamson x teen!reader #arsenal wfc x reader

[lumpsbumpsandwhumps]

jonas is the victorian child that we'll time travel to so we can give him a warhead and a redbull. a 4loko would also work

also if we want him to die a little faster give hil hot cheetos

Or, consider this, we give Jonas one (1) KFC chicken tender and suddenly he’s having the private driver pull up in a limo to the Sonic drive thru to buy a large nerds slush every day for the rest of his life

#ask #anon

[singledarkshade]

Deadly Puzzle

Part Two (Part One can be found here) CCPD was busy when Rip and Gideon walked towards Captain West’s office, he appeared just before they reached the door and motioned them to follow him to where everyone had congregated.

“We received the following letter about an hour ago.” West said, as the letter was projected onto the screen, “It has been authenticated. It's from the Yin-Yang killer.” There was a stunned silence from the older members of the force who looked horrified, while the younger ones looked confused. “Pay close attention,” West ordered before he read, “Hey, everybody, I'm back, for one night only. I'm going to kill someone tonight. Guess who? Guess where? Guess how? This is going to be so much fun. Signed, Mr. Yang.”

Rip grimaced, sensing what was coming and wrapped his arm around Gideon when West glanced their way before he continued.

“He's looking for a new challenger,” West stated, “That's what he does.”

Harrison spoke up, “Chief, I believe he's speaking to me. Trust me, I'm ready.”

West grimaced and moved to the next page, a photograph of Gideon taken after she’d solved the ‘Dinosaur Murder’.

Rip’s arm tightened around Gideon before he asked, “What do we have on his description?”

“We don't,” West told them, “We've never had any age, ethnicity or physical description. The harsh truth is that this is his game. And we just have to play along with him.”

Gideon frowned, “That's a terrific plan.”

“Especially since it's worked out so well in the past,” Harrison noted.

“Chief,” Ray Palmer called, “The Mayor's on the phone.”

West sighed, “Oh, here we go. Detective Wells, introduce Gideon and Rip to our point person.”

Harrison motioned to them to follow him across the room, “Listen up, you two…”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Gideon cut Harrison off, moving away from Rip, “Getting...I'm getting something already.”

Surprised Harrison demanded, “What? What is it?”

Gideon touched her hand to her temple, “I can see the killer.”

Kendra looked surprised, “Already?”

Gideon nodded, “Yes. And I know exactly where he is.”

Everybody stared at her as Gideon turned and pointed to the man sitting quietly in the corner, “Right there. Come on, that's our guy.”

Kendra winced, “Gideon…”

“Gideon,” Harrison took over, “This is Cisco Ramon, our profiler from the Serial Homicide and Abduction Task Force. He is very familiar with the patterns of our killer.”

She rolled her eyes, “Because he’s following them.”

“Gideon,” Rip murmured warningly, making her turn and cross her eyes at him.

“Nice to meet you both,” Cisco stood and offered his hand.

Rip instantly shook his hand, while Gideon frowned before doing the same.

Gideon studied him, “You’re looking a little pale and green.”

Cisco laughed, “Just getting over food-poisoning. My friend’s girlfriend is not the best in the kitchen.”

“Since we’re all friends now,” Harrison interrupted, “How about you give us the information?”

Cisco nodded, “Mr. Yang is the most notorious killer this city has never seen. He claimed six victims when he first appeared ten years ago, and has resurfaced twice, claiming a single victim in each instance. He only resurfaces when he feels there's a worthy opponent,” he looked at Gideon, “Now, his M.O. is to challenge us with the opportunity to save the victims by solving his riddles.”

Gideon piped up, “Quick question about what you ate?”

Rip frowned slightly but Cisco didn’t seem perturbed by Gideon’s random thought stream.

“Chicken casserole,” Cisco grimaced as he thought back before explaining, “I was trying not to hurt her feelings.”

“Now we’ve covered that,” Harrison interrupted testily, “Can we get on with this?”

“Yin-Yang,” Cisco continued looking slightly chastised, “The origin of this Chinese symbol is the unity of opposites. Two opposing, and at the same time, complementary aspects. Dark versus light. Killer versus cop. Kramer versus Kramer.”

Rolling his eyes that he now had two geniuses who couldn’t just get to the point, Harrison demanded, “Just show them the riddle.”

Cisco nodded and recited, “She serves the General well today whose soldiers wait to die. In a white river they shall pay for them she will not cry. Who is she?”

Gideon frowned as she began to turn the words around in her head.

“The riddle came with this stopwatch already running,” West said as he exited his office looking grim, “One of his classic moves.” West held up the stopwatch, “We've got one hour and ten minutes, people.”

“Generals and soldiers,” Harrison mused, “She'd be in the military,” he yelled, “Palmer!”

Ray Palmer, the CCPD’s equivalent of a golden retriever appeared, “Yes, sir?”

“I want you to contact every military base in an 80-mile radius,” the Detective ordered, “Find out if any female personnel have gone AWOL in the last 48 hours.”

Cisco shook his head, “You have to remember it’s your psychic he wants to play with, each riddle will relate to her personally.”

All eyes turned to Gideon and Kendra asked, “Do you have any thoughts, Gideon?”

With a sweet smile, Gideon nodded, “Yes, Kendra I do. First of all, his rhyming skills are rudimentary at best. ‘Today’ and ‘pay’? ‘Die’ and ‘cry’? Come on. That's bush league.”

“Gideon,” Rip said softly, “Please focus.”

“Jonas could do better at rhyming, Rip,” she told him.

Taking her arm, Rip moved Gideon to one side, “I know this is normally how you process things, but this is much more serious than we usually deal with. So please, Gideon focus.”

She shrugged, “Fine, I will be serious.”

 Joe West winced as he heard his name being called by a very annoyed Eve Baxter, turning he saw her marching through the bullpen.

“Joe,” she snapped reaching him, “You're not going to use my sister as a pawn.”

Joe frowned, ��Eve, I'll advise you to proceed with caution.”

“Need I remind you what happened to the last detective who went head-to-head with this sick bastard?” Eve demanded, “He lost, and an innocent girl died. I will not let you put Gideon in that position.”

Joe sighed, “Eve, I understand you want to protect your sister, but she is the one Yang has sent the riddle to, we need her. I will ensure Wells and Saunders are with her at each step, and Hunter will be there as well so go home and let us do our work.”

“Not a chance in hell,” Eve snapped.

“Eve, your sister is the only shot that we have,” Joe told her, “Period.”

Marching past him to Gideon and Rip, Eve tossed back at him, “Not my problem.”

 Gideon studied the riddle, aware of Rip hovering at her shoulder the way he did whenever he was worried about her.

“Excuse me,” the familiar voice said making them all turn to find Eve marching towards them. The moment she reached Gideon, Eve took her arm pulling her to private corner, “I need to talk to you.”

Gideon frowned, pulling her arm away from her sister, “Hey, did I miss a memo? I thought ‘Bring Your Sister to Work Day’ was next week.”

Eve frowned at her, “I forbid you to be a part of this, Gideon. You're coming with me.”

“What?” Gideon demanded, “You forbid me? I’m not a child anymore, Eve I can make my own decisions.”

Eve sighed, “Gideon, this guy knows about you, he knows about everybody you care about. Think about that,” Eve touched her sister’s cheek, “If you don't catch this son of a bitch, honey, you're never going to sleep again.”

“Rider,” Harrison yelled, “55 minutes.”

Gideon nodded at him before turning back to her sister, “Go home, Eve. I've got this and Rip will be at my side, so go home.”

Eve stared at her before sighing and heading away, “I’m here when you need me.”

Gideon shook her head and returned to Rip’s side.

“What’s wrong?” Rip asked softly.

Gideon shrugged, “Just Eve being Eve. What did I miss?”

“We’re trying to work out the riddle,” Rip told her, “Cisco said that this will be related to you so think about the last 24 hours. What you did, where you went and see if you can relate the riddle to something.”

Closing her eyes, Gideon leaned against Rip listening to his heartbeat as she let her mind slide through every step she’d made since yesterday.

She jerked back, “I know who the General is. His name is Mills.”

Rip frowned, “General Mills, the cereal manufacturer?”

“Exactly,” she nodded, “The white river is milk, and the soldiers are cereal.”

Wells, Kendra and Cisco all let out an ‘ahh’ as they put the pieces together.

“So,” Rip asked, “Who is she?”

                                 *********************************************

 Rip followed the group back into the police station. Vanessa, the waitress who had served them breakfast was now missing, and the next clue had sent them back to the station. He could see Gideon was already disturbed that someone had to have been watching them that morning, Rip wasn’t too happy about it himself, so was relieved Jonas was on his zoo trip while Miranda and his mother had both been fine when he quickly called to check on them.

“In here,” West motioned them to the conference room where a box sat wrapped like a Christmas present, “This was found outside the file room. It’s been scanned and there are no moving parts other than the stopwatch that was sitting on top of it.”

“So it’s not a bomb,” Harrison noted, “What is it?”

Kendra pulled out a pen from her pocket and gently lifted the oversized tag reading, “Gideon, a present to remember your past.”

Rip grimaced, knowing this was not going to be good, as he watched Gideon lift the lid on the present.

She let out an astonished gasp, filled with pain.

“Gideon?” Rip asked concerned.

“What is it?” Harrison demanded worry in his voice.

Slowly Gideon pulled out a small brown teddy bear, with a blue ribbon around its neck. A teddy bear that Rip knew well. Kendra, Harrison and Cisco all stared in confusion at the small scruffy stuffed creature Gideon was holding like it would shatter if she gripped it too tight.

“Gilbert,” Gideon whispered tearfully, “Why…why would he send me this? How? I keep Gilbert’s teddy in a safe.”

“Who is Gilbert?” Kendra asked confused, as she glanced at Harrison and Cisco who both shrugged.

Gideon gently rubbed the fur against her cheek, “He was my brother,” she whispered, “I lost him…he…about Jonas’ age.”

At this Rip and Gideon turned to one another, Rip grabbed his phone and began to call Miranda when it rang with Miranda calling him.

“What happened?” Rip demanded the moment he answered.

“Rip, I…I…” Miranda cried before taking a breath, “The bus the kids were on crashed.”

“Jonas?”

“He’s in the hospital,” Miranda replied, “That’s all they’d tell me.”

Rip turned to Gideon who squeezed his hand.

“Go,” she told him, “I have Harry and Kendra to help. Jonas and Miranda need you. Jonas comes first. Always.”

“I’m coming to pick you up,” Rip told Miranda, “I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

Hanging up he pressed a kiss to Gideon’s forehead before he grabbed Harrison’s arm moving him to one side.

“If this bastard knows about Gilbert,” Rip told him, “Then this could get ugly. I am trusting you to protect Gideon. Look after her, help her and pull her back if you need to.”

Harrison nodded, “I will. Check on your boy.”

Running out the station, Rip forced himself not to panic until there was something to panic about.

#fic #ripfic #legends of tomorrow #rip hunter #gideon #kendra saunders #eve baxter #the flash #joe west #cisco ramon #harrison wells #psych au verse

[camrensrealbish]

Camila’s spotify playlists 2015 part 1

I found Camila’s playlists recently and they definitely don’t get enough attention from us. There is so much valuable information there!! Ok, here we go..

2015

Let’s see what the songs are about and what was on August 2015 Camila’s mind. 

- You’re still the one by Shania Twain

When I first saw you, I saw love ----- from how Camila and Lauren described how they met, it was attraction from the first sight ---- And the first time you touched me, I felt love ----- but every touch is oh lalala (Señorita)---- And after all this time You're still the one I love, mmm, yeah

Looks like we made it Look how far we've come my baby We mighta took the long way ----- it took you 2 years to make up your mind (Should’ve said it)---- We knew we'd get there someday

They said, "I bet they'll never make it" But just look at us holding on We're still together still going strong

You're still the one I run to ----- I should be running, you keep me coming for you(Señorita) --- The one that I belong to You're still the one I want for life (You're still the one) You're still the one that I love The only one I dream of ---- all I do the whole day through is dream of you (Dream of you)---- You're still the one I kiss good night

Ain't nothin' better We beat the odds together I'm glad we didn't listen ----  My mama doesn't trust you, baby And my daddy doesn't know you, no (My oh my);  And papa says he got malo in him(Havana) ---- Look at what we’d missin’

- Kiss me by Sixpence None the Richer

Kiss me out of the bearded barley Nightly, beside the green, green grass Swing, swing, swing the spinning step You'll wear those shoes and I will wear that dress

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight Lead me out on the moonlit floor ---- Expectations MV---- Lift your open hand Strike up the band, and make the fireflies dance ---- Burning, fire and dancing are everywhere in Lauren and Camila’s songs---- Silvermoon's sparkling So kiss me

- Fly with me by Jonas Brothers

If time was still The sun would never never find us ---- SUN!! We could light up The sky tonight ---- MOON!! I would see the world through your eyes ---- Camila is obsessed with Lauren’s, also “ When I look in your eyes / I see through to my soul” (No way)----- Leave it all behind

If it's you and me forever If it's you and me right now ----- All the strangers are gone (In the dark)----That'd be alright Be alright If we chase the stars to lose our shadows

Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine ---- Camila loves Peter Pan, also Camren talking about Tinkerbell and Wendy in this interview ---- So won't you fly with me ---- Camila’s fairy wings and angel references in Romance ----

Maybe you were just afraid ---- Lauren had hard time admitting she’s attracted to women ---- Knowing you were miles away From the place where you needed to be And that's right here with me 

- Sweet disposition by Tamper Trap

-----Lauren’s tumblr name------

Sweet disposition Never too soon Oh, reckless abandon Like no one's watching you

A moment, a love A dream aloud A kiss, a cry  Our rights, our wrongs ----- the inconsistency of their relationship, expectations, moments - only having the nights for each other, not too many days off---- A moment, a love A dream aloud A moment, a love A dream, aloud

So stay there 'Cause I'll be coming over ----- I love it when you call me / you keep me coming (Señorita);  this love calling my name (This love) ---- And while our blood's still young It's so young, it runs And won't stop 'til it's over Won't stop to surrender

Songs of desperation I played them for you

- Drops of Jupiter by Train

Now that she's back in the atmosphere With drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey She acts like summer and walks like rain --- loving you was sunshine, but then it poured (Consequences);  Will you be the sun or the pouring rain? (Who are you)----- Reminds me that there's a-time to change, hey, hey Since the return of her stay on the moon --- MOON She listens like spring and she talks like June, hey, hey Hey, hey

But tell me Did you sail across the sun? ----SUN Did you make it to the Milky Way ---- All night MV ----- To see the lights all faded? And that Heaven is overrated?Tell me Did you fall from a shooting star --- I thank God and my lucky stars Darling, don't you know what you are? (Beautiful) ----

One without a permanent scar? ---- Everyone comes with scars but you can live them away (No way) ----

But tell me Did the wind sweep you off your feet? Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day --- instead of just at night in secret?? ----

And head back to the Milky Way? And tell me, did Venus blow your mind? Was it everything you wanted to find? And did you miss me while you were Looking for yourself out there?

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken ---- Chickens!! :) ---- Your best friend always sticking up for you Even when I know you're wrong? Can you imagine no first dance, freeze-dried romance Five-hour phone conversation The best soy latte that you ever had, and me?

- I’ll be your man by James Blunt 

Too many voices, too many noises ---- Little voices in my head (consequences)----

Invisible wires keeping us apart --- management?---- So many choices, but they're all disappointments And they only seal me away from you

Climb into our own private bubble ----secret relationship --- Let's get into all kinds of trouble

Slide over here let your hands feel the way --- touch me till I find myself in a feeling (Easy)--- There's no better method to communicate --- Tell me with your hands slow (Living proof) --- Girl stop your talking words just get in the way ---  Baby, could you shut up? / 'Cause I don't need you to come up with excuses / I just need your eyes on me (Back to me)---- I'll be your man So baby come over from the end of the sofa --- this couch is getting smaller (Into it)---- I'll be your man, I'll be your man

So many faces, staring at their shoelaces When all anyone wants is to be seen So tonight let's be honest We only want to be wanted And darling you got me wanting you

What are we all looking for? Someone we just can't ignore it's Real love dripping from my heart You've got me tripping What are we all looking for?

- No air by Jordin Sparks

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air?

If I should die before I wake It's 'cause you took my breath away Losing you is like living in a world with no air, oh ---- Losing you I couldn’t face but to love you is worse (This love) ---

I'm here alone, didn't wanna leave ----  Up in bed, all alone (Expectations)---- My heart won't move, it's incomplete Is there a way I could make you understand?

But how Do you expect me, to live alone with just me? 'Cause my world revolves around you It's so hard for me to breathe

I walked, I ran, I jumped, I flew right off The ground and float to you There's no gravity to hold me down, for real

But somehow I'm still alive inside You took my breath but I survived I don't know how but I don't even care

Camren supposedly broke up in the second half of 2015, but I think this song is not about this break up yet, since they were all added to the playlist on the same day.

 Expectations, consequences, In the dark, Real friends, This love, More than that can be related to this period. Read Karlaswine’s analysis of In the dark, some great insights there.

They probably got back together in the beginning of 2016. (Songs to fall in love to playlist from Feb 2016)

Conclusions

Every single song on this playlists has so many Camren references. They are all love songs except for the last one, so we can assume it was still ok in August 2015. I’m really suprised how much sun and moon Camila can find in other’s songs. Also these songs seem to fit her writing style and her vibe.

I’m gonna analyse the other playlists too and it gets interesting in the following years when she starts going back to songs from 2015 2016 in e.g 2018 ---> Camren is still alive? Stick with me ;)

#camren #gaymila #lauren jauregui #camila and lauren #camila cabeyo #camrenisreal #fifth harmony #camila #lauren #romance #expectations

[tabloidtoc]

Star, March 8

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: George Clooney vs. Brad Pitt -- the fight that ended their friendship

Page 1: Scott Disick's mid-life makeover -- some guys buy a convertible but Scott already has a garage full of fancy rides, so what else to do when you're edging close to 40, split from the mom of your three kids and are already dating a 19-year-old model? Well, bleach your hair platinum, of course!

Page 2: Contents, Leighton Meester and Adam Brody celebrated their sixth wedding anniversary with a couple's surf session

Page 3: Star Shots -- John Legend wore an eye-catching sweater to a photoshoot in West Hollywood, Anya Taylor-Joy stunned in a crimson gown on the set of an untitled David O. Russell-directed period film, Jason Sudeikis grabbed a bite during a break from filming Ted Lasso's second season in London

Page 4: After hosting countless rose ceremonies over nearly two decades of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette, Chris Harrison is now in the hot seat himself and facing backlash for defending current Bachelor frontrunner Rachael Kirkconnell who's been accused of racist behavior -- the next day, Chris apologized and said he was stepping aside as host of the dating reality series but the damage was done as Rachel Lindsay who is the first Black lead in the franchise's history revealed she won't renew her Bachelor contract and current Bachelor Matt James supported her -- as for Chris, the fallout continues as Crest are considering pulling down ads featuring him but with critics calling for his ouster Chris wants his job back and no one at ABC wants to see him replaced but those conversations are happening

Page 5: Miley Cyrus has an idea how to help Britney Spears in her legal battle to replace dad Jamie Spears as her conservator -- Miley is hoping she and Britney can record a classic song together like an anthem like Sisters Are Doin' It for Themselves or Enough Is Enough and she's hoping to get Britney on board but that may be a challenge with the legal restrictions in place

* Mom-of-eight Kate Gosselin didn't get what she was asking for on her house in Pennsylvania -- it's upsetting that she got less than she paid for it but her hand was forced; it costs a lot to keep up a house like that on 20-plus acres and with years of roughhousing, it needs a lot of work -- with twins Mady and Cara already in college and the sextuplets growing up, Kate hopes to jump-start her career and she's dying to leave Pennsylvania and head to Hollywood

* Paris Hilton's boyfriend of just over a year Carter Reum dropped to one knee on a gorgeous private beach and offered Paris his heart and a sparkler from Cartier and she said yes -- close family was on hand to celebrate the couple who have been friends for 15 years and the party went on well into the evening -- now Paris is already making wedding plans for something simple and elegant with a gorgeous dinner and the couple is ready to start a family sooner rather than later and she's hinted she's already started IVF and if she gets pregnant they'll just push up the wedding

Page 6: Ryan Gosling needed some time off after 2018's moon-landing biopic First Man because he really became Neil Armstrong during the six months of shooting and he was absolutely drained after finishing it and he spent the next two years with wife Eva Mendes being a full-time dad to their two young kids -- now he's back and with three movies lined up, he's looking at a $75 million paycheck this year -- in addition to The Gray Man, he's gearing up for a Wolfman update and another space adventure called Project Hail Mary -- he wants to be a popcorn-movie star and he's going full-blown buff-and-shirtless action hero

* Allen v. Farrow is a new investigation into 1992 allegations about Woody Allen by his adopted daughter Dylan Farrow and her mother Mia Farrow that digs up damning new evidence against the director -- one harrowing home video shows the then-7-year-old Dylan saying her dad touched her privates and later a doorman and a building manager and a maid at Allen's NYC residence raise questions about when Woody began his shocking relationship with Mia's teen daughter Soon-Yi -- Mia also expresses fear in the doc, saying she worries that when the documentary comes out he'll be on the attack again and he'll do whatever he has to do to save himself

* Star Spots the Stars -- Julia Roberts, Joe Jonas, Luann de Lesseps, Christina Aguilera, Kaia Gerber, Tarek El Moussa and Heather Rae Young

Page 8: Star Shots -- With balloons and a box of chocolate in hand lifestyle expert Gretta Monahan arrived at The View, Melissa Gorga snacked on a huge box of sweets between Zoom interviews to promote the 11 season of The Real Housewives of New Jersey, Vanessa Lachey prepared to host a Galentine's Day celebration with macarons and wine

Page 10: Jenna Dewan making a plant-based meal, Selling Sunset's Christine Quinn and her husband Christian Richard sipped juice bar drinks while running errands in Beverly Hills, Hugh Grant stopped to tend to his laces while out for a walk in Chelsea in West London, Carrie Underwood prepped for her daily workout session in pieces from her Calia fitness apparel line

Page 12: After a stop at the Kidding Around children's store Bradley Cooper had his hands full walking with his daughter Lea in NYC, Sofia Vergara chic in a blowout and patterned top in Beverly Hills, Justin Bieber looked comfy in a message tee and pajama bottoms in L.A.

Page 13: Thandie Newton looked tense while Chris Pine hit the ground running as the two filmed the spy thriller All the Old Knives in London, Jon Bernthal braved the frigid water while Gretchen Mol bundled up on the set of American Gigolo in L.A.

Page 14: Think Pink -- Jennifer Lopez hoisted an oversized customized bubble-gum hued Coach satchel in a promo shot in NYC, Cardi B slipped on neon sneakers from her Reebok collaboration to shop on Rodeo Drive in L.A., Hilary Duff showing off a peek of her growing baby bump on the set of Younger in NYC

Page 16: In town to film The Hills: New Beginnings with their castmates Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag played in the snow with their son Gunner in Lake Tahoe

Page 17: Mandy Moore and husband Taylor Goldsmith celebrated their last Valentine's Day before parenthood with a romantic stroll in Pasadena, Michelle Obama on her new children's show Waffles + Mochi

Page 18: Chris Meloni and Mariska Hargitay in NYC, hiding her locks in a cute newsboy cap Brooke Burke grabbed dinner at Nobu in Malibu, Krysten Ritter brought her son Bruce to meet some farm animals at the Gentle Barn in Santa Clarita

Page 20: Normal or Not? Farrah Abraham suffered a serious wardrobe malfunction while hitting the sand in Malibu -- not normal, Nikki Reed gushing over her therapy chicken -- normal, Property Brothers' Drew Scott booty bumpin' with wife Linda Phan -- not normal, Lucy Hale lovingly held onto her new dog Ethel while fueling up her ride in L.A. -- normal

Page 22: Fashion -- stars in pastel frocks -- Heidi Klum, Sophia Bush, Chrissy Teigen

Page 23: Rihanna, Kirsten Dunst

Page 26: Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker are having sexy slumber parties at Kourtney's $8.5 million Calabasas pad and they are spending so much time together and she loves having him sleep over and he'll stay the whole weekend -- Travis who has lived nearby in the gated community for years is already making himself at home and not only has he moved a bunch of stuff into Kourtney's property but she leaves him to chill out and enjoy his space if she has to run errands -- even if it seems the couple is moving and moving in fast, their respective broods are on board with the new arrangement and Kourtney's kids Mason, Penelope and Reign love having Travis around and meanwhile the door is always open for Travis' kids Alabama and Landon, and Travis and Kourtney do a lot of fun stuff with their kids together -- there's already speculation that the move-in will be permanent because Kourtney knows a good thing when she sees it and Travis checks all the boxes

Page 27: Meeting the in-laws might be a little complicated for newly engaged Shailene Woodley and Aaron Rodgers because the Green Bay Packers QB is famously estranged from his Chico, California-based family -- in 2016 Aaron's younger brother Jordan Rodgers exposed the rift while competing on The Bachelorette and at the time, fans blamed Aaron's then-girlfriend Olivia Munn for turning him Hollywood but the trouble continued after their 2017 split -- now that he's with Shailene, Aaron doesn't want to bring her into that toxic atmosphere but Shailene who once called her own folks super f**ked up is not deterred and she is encouraging Aaron to let bygones be bygones but he's not ready

* Melissa and Joe Gorga's marriage troubles will play out on the new season of The Real Housewives of New Jersey but their issues are even worse behind the scenes and they've been butting heads as Melissa's career continues to skyrocket so she's distracted with work and doesn't have time for Joe and he feels neglected and he isn't one to hold back -- it doesn't help that the Envy boutique owner was rumored to be getting close to another man -- the couple is trying to work out their issues for the sake of their three kids but Melissa may be done

Page 28: Cover Story -- George Clooney and Brad Pitt: The Breaking Point -- fights, jealousy and other women -- the former besties had a major falling out and now mutual friend Sandra Bullock is desperate to reunite them -- George and Brad have barely spoken in eight years and they've definitely gone their separate ways and Brad's ex-wife Angelina Jolie played a big part in the demise of their friendship because Angie felt George took Brad away from her and their kids -- Amal Clooney found Angie unbearable and that was kind of the point of no return for Brad and George -- George is struggling to regain his luster as a director while Brad is out there winning Oscars

Page 32: Prince Harry and Meghan Markle: Interview Shockers -- as they prep for baby number two, Harry and Meghan announce a no-holds-barred interview, leaving the palace on edge

Page 34: Celebs in Wheel Trouble -- don't drink (or drug) and drive; these stars got caught making some very bad decisions -- Bruce Springsteen, mug shots of Justin Bieber

Page 35: Reese Witherspoon, Vince Vaughn, Lindsay Lohan, Michael Phelps, Khloe Kardashian, Henry Thomas, Heather Locklear, Jesse Luken, Mel Gibson

Page 36: Beauty -- curl care -- strengthen every type of wave and coil with cool new miracle workers

Page 48: Parting Shot -- Bill Murray teamed up with NFL player Larry Fitzgerald for the AT&T Every Shot Counts Charity Challenge in Pebble Beach -- despite landing in third place, Bill and Larry made a great pair, earning an impressive $209,000 for local charities

#tabloid #grain of salt #tabloid toc #tabloidtoc #george clooney #brad pitt #sandra bullock #amal clooney #angelina jolie #scott disick #chris harrison #the bachelor #miley cyrus #britney spears #kate gosselin #paris hilton #carter reum #ryan gosling #woody allen #mia farrow #dylan farrow #allen v. farrow #kourtney kardashian #travis barker #aaron rodgers #shailene woodley #melissa gorga #joe gorga #meghan markle #prince harry

[higanbana-crimson]

name: Jona or Jon

birthday: April 27th

gender: Genderfluid,but mostly female leaning

orientation: Pansexual!!

age: 20

favorite soda: Root beer for sure!!

favorite candy: Suckers or candy canes or milk chocolate

favorite pizza: Pepperoni

favorite salad dressing: I despise all salad dressings with a boiling red hot hatred that runs deep

favorite meal: McDonald’s Chicken nuggets with fries or Wendy’s chicken nuggets with fries or pepperoni pizza. I’m a very simple person with taste and texture lol

best memory: I don’t have one lol

best friend(s): I have one on Discord, but she doesn’t have a Tumblr. And im not sure if anyone here right now considers me a best friend lol.

best relative: My dad or older sister

best pet: All are cool too me,I love pets

best celebrity: J Michael Tatum?

one random fact about you: I’m awful with names and often identify friends as just “Oh That Friend!!” in my head

one random fact about your day: I’m debating what shade of teal is good for oc,leaning to a more green teal than a blue teal

one random fact about your job/school: Rather keep this private lol

one random fact about your favorite tv show: I don’t have any lol

one random fact you wish was a fact but it isn’t: I don’t understand this lol

tagged by: @bleachintothemultiverse

tagging: Anyone!!

#figure masked: mun jona

[tttoluca]

dinah

wow thank you, anon, that definitely wasn't me from a different account, how gracious of you

Full name is Dinah Hope Tellerman.

Gender is female, she's bi (her friends thought she was their token straight friend until she admitted that she was crushing hard on her older brother's wife)

Pronouns are she/her.

Ethnicity is caucasian.

Birthplace is Florida, birthday is February 6th 2000 (aquarius sun, pisces moon, cancer rising).

Guilty pleasures are dark humor and extremely graphic slasher films. Oh, and also cottagecore. She wouldn't live a cottagecore lifestyle but she loves the aesthetic.

Phobias are small spaces and germs.

She'd probably become tiktok famous, but in the sort of "forgotten Jonas brother" way, because she's not quite as 'alt' as Tate and Storm, but definitely doesn't fit on straight tiktok. She might have a very ordinary desk job because she doesn't see much of a future for herself, but she might get some online attention for sharing her stopmotion films.

She'd get arrested for vandalism, on both public and private property (she's keyed a couple of cars, and would love to try out spray painted graffiti)

I don't ship her with anyone, she's not in the right headspace to date anybody, and the only people she's had feeling for are Mel, who's married, and Tate, whom she has some unresolved tension with.

OC most likely to murder her is her brother, and the feeling is mutual. He's always been an ass, but it got worse after her dad died, and they wound up distant and resenting eachother.

Favorite movie/book genre is old 80s fantasy movies (she fucks with The Neverending Story, The Last Unicorn, Labyrinth, etc) and horror movies. She keeps up-to-date with updates on Laika movies too.

She's not a huge of romance in movies and books, and she hates dystopian novels too. Not for any particular reason, she just hates them.

Her talent is in stopmotion - her brother accidentally got her into it when she was like, 8, because he would watch shit like Robot Chicken, and the style always fascinated her. She'd use her dad's camera and her Littlest Pet Shop toys to make little stopmotion movie, and when she was 9, she got her own camera and two small tubs of colored clay. She stopped after a few months, but her interest was sparked again when she was eleven, and her school counselor asked if she had any hobbies. She adored that counselor and wanted her approval more than anything (her counselor was technically her first FP and she detested hearing about the other kids who went to her office, it always stabbed her in the heart), so she made a short stopmotion film depicting a fly getting caught in a spider's web, the fly making friendly conversation, and despite it and the spider hitting it off, getting eaten anyway. The praise from her counselor stuck with her, and flared her passion to keep dabbling in it for a long time.

Someone might love her because she doesn't take anything too seriously and is impulsive and fun to be around.

Someone might hate her for those very reasons, but also because she craves constant attention and validation and can get overbearing.

She changes after moving in with Mel and Asher. Mel, who was raised by two loving foster parents and was exposed to children from all sorts of different backgrounds, cared about Dinah a lot, and helped her manage her mental health, though she still has episodes of self-hatred, and still struggles with intense jealousy when her friends are affectionate with eachother.

I love her because she was my first actual OC, is the center of my "passion project," and because if she was a real person, we'd get along really well

#oc #shut up town

[viktcrr-alt]

MAXENCE DANET FAUVAL / NONBINARY — don’t look now, but is that viktor samuels i see? the 24 year old visual arts student is in their senior year and he/they are a rochester alum. i hear they can be observant, ingenious, reticent and dependent, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet he/they will make a name for themselves living in garcia row. ( james. 20. est. she/they. )

LAST INTRO WOOOO !! u know what to mf DO !!

TW DEATH, HEAVY GRIEF, OVERDOSE / DRUG ADDICTION, HOSPITALIZATION, HYPERSEXUALITY, RELIGION MENTIONS, MENTAL ILLNESS

a e s t h e t i c s

old tvs and their static, worn tapes, horror movie screams, spilled ink, a sculptor’s hands, clay-stained, chicken scratch handwriting, messy notes, messy hair, scoffs and eye-rolls, bruised knuckles, sore throats, funeral homes and a crying preacher, shattered ceramics, knife fights, high ledges, vertically-striped pants, red lights, the moon shrouded in clouds, cigarette butts.

general info !!

full name: viktor phillip samuels

nickname(s): icky vicky :/

b.o.d. - jan 2nd

label(s): the black hole, the crepehanger, the impious, the opaque, the tempest, etc.

height: 6′0″

hometown: rochester, new york

sexuality: uuuhhh god … probably pan tbh

pinterest

stats

biography !!

okay so … born and raised in rochester, new york to the well known samuels family. preacher father, a mother, a twin sister born 15 minutes before him - aka tatiana samuels, who died back in january.

kinda … grew up as a really awkward, quiet kid? like … just didn’t really interact with other kids super well, preferred being alone and like … digging up bugs in the dirt. only friend was like … his own sister.

grew out of this as they got older, instead sort of … becoming a bit of a dick? to compensate for years of awkwardness? will bite the hand that feeds him. was a full on nuisance by middle school. tatiana was not, at least, noticeably.

has always been a fan of darker materials, y’know - grim and creepy, morbid shit. big fan of tim burton ever since he was a kid, which isn’t … a good look for a preacher’s son, but he’s never really felt ~in~ with the rest of his family, anyway.

drew disturbing pictures as a kid probably tbh that prompted one or two or five phone calls home 2 assure everything was fine.

has always been really … good at art, in general - from drawing to painting to playing with clay, that’s always been viktor’s Thing.

aNyWaYs. being tatiana’s twin brother was kinda hard sometimes. tatiana and him were near opposites besides their same mean-spirited trait. she was better in the public than he was, but viktor was arguably more talented than tatiana. they both loved each other deeply and found each other as competition for their parents’ attention - a rivalry, of sorts.

high school is when viktor really started to act out - started extreme, like losing his virginity in their church and vandalism around the neighborhoods. faked being possessed in the middle of sunday service. almost had an exorcism performed on him, probably.

the only redeemable trait was like … his sheer talent with art. was in a 3d art AP course, specialized in sculpting - could pretty much create anything he wanted with enough dedication.

because his parents would be focused on disciplining him for his antics, tatiana could sneak away and get away with stuff easier. so like, y’know, that’s on the bright-side of things.

never been particularly motivated to do much - wasn’t planning on attending lockwood but his parents kinda … did and sent in his application for him b/c they were Not on board with him Wasting Away (wanted him out of the house asap)

actually pretty smart !! just doesn’t like … want to apply himself ever. double majoring in english and visual arts because they’re like … two of his only interests :/ plus he wants to write and illustrate his own series of children books with a style similar to tim burton’s

he’d been experimenting since high school but college is where he really started to like … crack down on himself and figure himself out. was out as pan & nonbinary by his sophomore year of college, just … not to his family, necessarily. thinks tatiana always knew, but didn’t … really use it against him, blessedly enough

always felt like the whole twin - connection thing was … both wack and also not-wack? sometimes it felt believable but sometimes he had no idea what was going on in tatiana’s head. but he felt oddly transparent to her, always - like he was predictable to no one but her.

( TW DEATH, GRIEF, OVERDOSE / HOSPITALIZATION BEYOND THIS POINT )

but when tatiana disappeared - it was like, like viktor knew. the moment she had been kidnapped - felt something deeply wrong in his gut. and when tatiana died - viktor felt something cut so severely in him. he knew, he always knew exactly when. he couldn’t put his finger on how - but he knew. even when everybody else held out hope for her to be found - he knew.

went on a bender around the same time, had always struggled w/ drug addiction but it got worse the longer tatiana went without being found.

( also struggled heavily with his mental health, too ?? has manic and depressive episodes. will fixate on a sculpting project for six months and then purposely knock it off the table and destroy it in the matter of seconds once it’s finished for. no fucking reason. impulse spends A Lot. )

when her body was found, viktor went off the rails. ended up overdosing and being hospitalized where he spent the next like … however long months … until they deemed him better.

has been back since the beginning of fall semester in an attempt to finish his senior year - mostly out of his parents’ insistence that he did, because he very much did not want to. 

is still dealing with a lot of trauma & grief, which was only amplified with dean lockwood’s death - causing him to spiral and be unpredictable with his mental health. some days are good, and some days are very bad.

personality !!

the human embodiment of a gremlin, fed after midnight. a goblin, if u will. one of those cats with a narrow head and big ass ears. that’s him.

b i g horror & halloween enthusiast. loves the old campy horror movies. probably has an abundance of masks from different movies. dresses like a grimy millennial beetlejuice more than he should. love those vertically striped pants!

fashion alternates between e-boy (would b tik tok famous if he were like … 17), millennial beetlejuice, and like … goth in a crop top and sweatpants. big fan of crop tops. big fan of sweatpants.

he can be fucking mean. petty, aggressive, instigator. will literally spit in ur face or no reason. kind of person who’ll stick his gum into other ppl’s hair. other than that he’s like … pretty okay. he’s not always mean, he’s just a dick like … 70% of the time lmao

i mean yeah okay he’ll call someone a stinky bitch for no reason except He Feels Like It And Believes It. it’s fine he’s fine, we’re fine.

despite the fact tht he’s probably getting into fights whenever - considers himself 2 be a lover n not a fighter but that’s just because he Fucks a lot. kind of uses it like a coping mechanism, like he’s this big fancy carnival show that’s like ‘come one, come all! fuck the dead girl’s twin brother!’ may have a problem w/ hypersexuality but it’s nothing he’s fully. aware of.

the preacher’s whore son, basically

like i said he’s pan & nb, switches between he and they pronouns but like … he has such a fragile grip on his identity that u could call him ‘dog-faced bitch’ and he’d turn like hey wassup :)

vastly impulsive, like i’ve mentioned … destroys his own creations 4 the fun of it, spends all his money on useless shit, will cheat on someone bc he feels like it. screams into the night sky frequently, like a cat in heat.

i mean he also creates useless shit for no reason too. spent six months sculpting a hollowed out tree the size of him and then took a sledgehammer to it.

dramatic fuck. used to play the organ at the church like … when no one was looking after him and service was about to start. just these creepy as melodies. would do the same thing at home on his keyboard w/ the organ setting whenever he got grounded until his parents took away his keyboard sadjfkg

won’t talk about his time away b/c it’s not rly anybody’s business but ofc nothing is sacred to the watershed app, y’know, nothing’s private.

still like - he absolutely refuses to talk about tatiana’s death and like, his mental health or his addiction (he’s fallen back into it tbh but it hasn’t gotten bad again … yet) or like … anything involving his own emotions

will literally just change the topic! abruptly, no warning, asks about the jonas brothers instead.

that being said he’s obsessed with tatiana’s death. tatiana was very much a rock for him, kinda dependent on her in a way? just … being there, y’know, kept him grounded.

so he obv became a shepherd bc he wants to know Everything there is abt the app, wants to be deep inside it, wanted to know Who Exactly Killed Tatiana and like … not saying he wants 2 commit murder but :/ yknow. he’s very upset.

emotionally unavailable while also like crying twice a day.

will tell you straight up what he wants from you, no bullshit, no beating around the bush - just blunt. if he wants to just fuck, nothing else, then that’s that. if he feels deviation he’ll ghost in like. less than a second. kinda awful like that! feels no shame.

but like … also is emotional ?? as shit ?? it’s confusing. he’ll cry on a whim and then flip u off if u try to console him or like. ask him anything. will bite you.

he goes to therapy but he generally fucks around and wastes most of the time until the therapist threatens to like … idk what therapists r allowed to threaten. to send him off to another therapist? idk.

likes being intimidating but like … not with his body or nothing ‘cos he’s a TWIG, but like … uses his love for horror n creepy shit to his advantage. has an abundance of fake blood. has channeled the energy of jack nicholson and used it on tatiana’s boyfriends before.

( also a big fan of sfx makeup, has dabbled in it)

probably chases kids with a chainsaw (w/o the like … chain … or w/e … so it’s not actually Dangerous) around halloween

he’s generally never doing good, both mental health wise and morally.

would probably steal candy from a baby for the fun of it.

i don’t know if there’s a good to him, deep down, and i don’t know if he sees any issues with himself either !! nothing really breaks through to him anymore, the only person who ever really made him stop and Think about his actions was tatiana.

kinda introverted, recluse type who doesn’t rly like most people or going out, but he’ll go to parties if it means he’ll be high as shit.

pretty observant. likes to analyze people even though he’s probably not … fully right.

wanted connections !!

he lives alone currently but like … ex - roommates where viktor was just. a nightmare to live with.

feel like a lot of enemies is also a possibility !! viktor’s messy.

people that like … knew tatiana. dated tatiana, even, and viktor would pretty much try to intimidate / scare them at any given chance :/

close friends of tatiana too

people who hated tatiana but liked viktor. people who hated viktor but liked tatiana

people who take pity on him and he Hates it viciously and vocally.

a band of hooligan gremlin kids who do drugs and fuck shit up around town like they’re edgy teenagers even though they’re all early to mid 20s.

the girl he lost his virginity 2 in high school lmao … a distant memory

fellow rochester locals, from church or school or whatever

exes from the past !! good terms and bad terms, but i love bad terms a whole lot mainly b/c viktor’s a jackass.

don’t know if he’s soft towards anybody but we can try. we can Try.

friends, old friends, new friends, bad friends, good friends, close friends, frenemies, etc. etc. all of it

hookups !! so many hookups. fwbs, one night stands, whatever.

uuhhhh god. i don’t know. im so sleepy rn. people in the same major or similar majors.

maybe a ride or die.

people he’s a bad influence on / an enabler towards / all around toxic for them / each other.

people he’s fought !! people who’ve seen him get into random fights and were like ‘uh wtf’

fellow shepherds !!

literally anything im not picky.

#huntingtonintro #death tw #grief tw #overdose tw #drugs tw #addiction tw #hospitalization tw #hypersexuality tw #murder tw #religion mentions #mental health tw

[viktcrr-archive]

MAXENCE DANET FAUVEL / NONBINARY. — viktor samuels is really making a name for themselves as a tier 3 shepherd. i think that he/they are studying english + visual arts in their senior year at lockwood, living in peregrinis. originally from rochester, new york, viktor is known to be observant & ingenious, but can also be reticent & dependent. — james / 20 / est / she/they.

3/5 !!! once again ... little edits

TW DEATH, HEAVY GRIEF, OVERDOSE / DRUG ADDICTION, HOSPITALIZATION, HYPERSEXUALITY, RELIGION MENTIONS, MENTAL ILLNESS

a e s t h e t i c s

old tvs and their static, worn tapes, horror movie screams, spilled ink, a sculptor’s hands, clay-stained, chicken scratch handwriting, messy notes, messy hair, scoffs and eye-rolls, bruised knuckles, sore throats, funeral homes and a crying preacher, shattered ceramics, knife fights, high ledges, vertically-striped pants, red lights, the moon shrouded in clouds, cigarette butts.

general info !!

full name: viktor phillip samuels

nickname(s): icky vicky :/

b.o.d. - jan 2nd

label(s): the black hole, the crepehanger, the impious, the opaque, the tempest, etc.

height: 6′0″

hometown: rochester, new york

sexuality: uuuhhh god … probably pan tbh

pinterest

stats

biography !!

okay so … born and raised in rochester, new york to the well known samuels family. preacher father, a mother, a twin sister born 15 minutes before him - aka tatiana samuels, who died back in january.

kinda … grew up as a really awkward, quiet kid? like … just didn’t really interact with other kids super well, preferred being alone and like … digging up bugs in the dirt. only friend was like … his own sister.

grew out of this as they got older, instead sort of … becoming a bit of a dick? to compensate for years of awkwardness? will bite the hand that feeds him. was a full on nuisance by middle school. tatiana was not, at least, noticeably.

has always been a fan of darker materials, y’know - grim and creepy, morbid shit. big fan of tim burton ever since he was a kid, which isn’t … a good look for a preacher’s son, but he’s never really felt ~in~ with the rest of his family, anyway.

drew disturbing pictures as a kid probably tbh that prompted one or two or five phone calls home 2 assure everything was fine.

has always been really … good at art, in general - from drawing to painting to playing with clay, that’s always been viktor’s Thing.

aNyWaYs. being tatiana’s twin brother was kinda hard sometimes. tatiana and him were near opposites besides their same mean-spirited trait. she was better in the public than he was, but viktor was arguably more talented than tatiana. they both loved each other deeply and found each other as competition for their parents’ attention - a rivalry, of sorts.

high school is when viktor really started to act out - started extreme, like losing his virginity in their church and vandalism around the neighborhoods. faked being possessed in the middle of sunday service. almost had an exorcism performed on him, probably.

the only redeemable trait was like … his sheer talent with art. was in a 3d art AP course, specialized in sculpting - could pretty much create anything he wanted with enough dedication.

because his parents would be focused on disciplining him for his antics, tatiana could sneak away and get away with stuff easier. so like, y’know, that’s on the bright-side of things.

never been particularly motivated to do much - wasn’t planning on attending lockwood but his parents kinda … did and sent in his application for him b/c they were Not on board with him Wasting Away (wanted him out of the house asap)

actually pretty smart !! just doesn’t like … want to apply himself ever. double majoring in english and visual arts because they’re like … two of his only interests :/ plus he wants to write and illustrate his own series of children books with a style similar to tim burton’s

he’d been experimenting since high school but college is where he really started to like … crack down on himself and figure himself out. was out as pan & nonbinary by his sophomore year of college, just … not to his family, necessarily. thinks tatiana always knew, but didn’t … really use it against him, blessedly enough

always felt like the whole twin - connection thing was … both wack and also not-wack? sometimes it felt believable but sometimes he had no idea what was going on in tatiana’s head. but he felt oddly transparent to her, always - like he was predictable to no one but her.

( TW DEATH, GRIEF, OVERDOSE / HOSPITALIZATION BEYOND THIS POINT )

but when tatiana disappeared - it was like, like viktor knew. the moment she had been kidnapped - felt something deeply wrong in his gut. and when tatiana died - viktor felt something cut so severely in him. he knew, he always knew exactly when. he couldn’t put his finger on how - but he knew. even when everybody else held out hope for her to be found - he knew.

went on a bender around the same time, had always struggled w/ drug addiction but it got worse the longer tatiana went without being found.

( also struggled heavily with his mental health, too ?? has manic and depressive episodes. will fixate on a sculpting project for six months and then purposely knock it off the table and destroy it in the matter of seconds once it’s finished for. no fucking reason. impulse spends A Lot. )

when her body was found, viktor went off the rails. ended up overdosing and being hospitalized where he spent the next like … however long months … until they deemed him better.

stayed out of school until very recently b/c he just … didn’t want to go back. didn’t want to deal with it. didn’t want to be known as the dead girl’s twin. but then his mom kinda just was like ‘u go back 2 school or god so help me’ n he was like FINE.

so ya !! viktor’s back after being gone since tatiana’s body was found. that’s it, that’s him, a lil glimpse of his life.

trying to finish his senior year b/c he … obviously left before he could.

finding out that it was george who killed tatiana has ultimately ... caused viktor to spiral. his lows are some of his lowest, his highs are ... very high, but very bad. unstable & unpredictable in his actions it’s ... a whole thing :/

personality !!

the human embodiment of a gremlin, fed after midnight. a goblin, if u will. one of those cats with a narrow head and big ass ears. that’s him.

b i g horror & halloween enthusiast. loves the old campy horror movies. probably has an abundance of masks from different movies. dresses like a grimy millennial beetlejuice more than he should. love those vertically striped pants!

fashion alternates between e-boy (would b tik tok famous if he were like … 17), millennial beetlejuice, and like … goth in a crop top and sweatpants. big fan of crop tops. big fan of sweatpants.

he can be fucking mean. petty, aggressive, instigator. will literally spit in ur face or no reason. kind of person who’ll stick his gum into other ppl’s hair. other than that he’s like … pretty okay. he’s not always mean, he’s just a dick like … 70% of the time lmao

i mean yeah okay he’ll call someone a stinky bitch for no reason except He Feels Like It And Believes It. it’s fine he’s fine, we’re fine.

despite the fact tht he’s probably getting into fights whenever - considers himself 2 be a lover n not a fighter but that’s just because he Fucks a lot. kind of uses it like a coping mechanism, like he’s this big fancy carnival show that’s like ‘come one, come all! fuck the dead girl’s twin brother!’ may have a problem w/ hypersexuality but it’s nothing he’s fully. aware of.

the preacher’s whore son, basically

like i said he’s pan & nb, switches between he and they pronouns but like … he has such a fragile grip on his identity that u could call him ‘dog-faced bitch’ and he’d turn like hey wassup :)

vastly impulsive, like i’ve mentioned … destroys his own creations 4 the fun of it, spends all his money on useless shit, will cheat on someone bc he feels like it. screams into the night sky frequently, like a cat in heat.

i mean he also creates useless shit for no reason too. spent six months sculpting a hollowed out tree the size of him and then took a sledgehammer to it.

dramatic fuck. used to play the organ at the church like … when no one was looking after him and service was about to start. just these creepy as melodies. would do the same thing at home on his keyboard w/ the organ setting whenever he got grounded until his parents took away his keyboard sadjfkg

won’t talk about his time away b/c it’s not rly anybody’s business but ofc nothing is sacred to the watershed app, y’know, nothing’s private.

still like - he absolutely refuses to talk about tatiana’s death and like, his mental health or his addiction (he’s fallen back into it tbh but it hasn’t gotten bad again … yet) or like … anything involving his own emotions

will literally just change the topic! abruptly, no warning, asks about the jonas brothers instead.

that being said he’s obsessed with tatiana’s death. tatiana was very much a rock for him, kinda dependent on her in a way? just … being there, y’know, kept him grounded.

so he obv became a shepherd bc he wants to know Everything there is abt the app, wants to be deep inside it, wanted to know Who Exactly Killed Tatiana and like … not saying he wants 2 commit murder but :/ yknow. he’s very upset.

emotionally unavailable while also like crying twice a day.

will tell you straight up what he wants from you, no bullshit, no beating around the bush - just blunt. if he wants to just fuck, nothing else, then that’s that. if he feels deviation he’ll ghost in like. less than a second. kinda awful like that! feels no shame.

but like … also is emotional ?? as shit ?? it’s confusing. he’ll cry on a whim and then flip u off if u try to console him or like. ask him anything. will bite you.

he goes to therapy but he generally fucks around and wastes most of the time until the therapist threatens to like … idk what therapists r allowed to threaten. to send him off to another therapist? idk.

likes being intimidating but like … not with his body or nothing ‘cos he’s a TWIG, but like … uses his love for horror n creepy shit to his advantage. has an abundance of fake blood. has channeled the energy of jack nicholson and used it on tatiana’s boyfriends before.

( also a big fan of sfx makeup, has dabbled in it)

probably chases kids with a chainsaw (w/o the like … chain … or w/e … so it’s not actually Dangerous) around halloween

he’s generally never doing good, both mental health wise and morally.

would probably steal candy from a baby for the fun of it.

i don’t know if there’s a good to him, deep down, and i don’t know if he sees any issues with himself either !! nothing really breaks through to him anymore, the only person who ever really made him stop and Think about his actions was tatiana.

kinda introverted, recluse type who doesn’t rly like most people or going out, but he’ll go to parties if it means he’ll be high as shit.

pretty observant. likes to analyze people even though he’s probably not … fully right.

connections to the victims !!

tatiana samuels / his twin sister, other half - the only one able to control viktor.

george craig iii / close family friends ... they could appreciate each other, when viktor wasn’t being an outright asshole.

hana williams / ‘friends’ with benefits, their relationship was rocky at best but she was a good lay. have often fought due to their clash in personalities and viktor’s history with christoph.

christoph wainwright / an ex-hook up, an infrequent occasion whenever christoph wanted to tick off hana. viktor was often on board, never the one to consider others’ feelings.

wanted connections !!

he lives alone currently but like … ex - roommates where viktor was just. a nightmare to live with.

feel like a lot of enemies is also a possibility !! viktor’s messy.

people that like … knew tatiana. dated tatiana, even, and viktor would pretty much try to intimidate / scare them at any given chance :/

close friends of tatiana too

people who hated tatiana but liked viktor. people who hated viktor but liked tatiana

people who take pity on him and he Hates it viciously and vocally.

a band of hooligan gremlin kids who do drugs and fuck shit up around town like they’re edgy teenagers even though they’re all early to mid 20s.

the girl he lost his virginity 2 in high school lmao … a distant memory

fellow rochester locals, from church or school or whatever

exes from the past !! good terms and bad terms, but i love bad terms a whole lot mainly b/c viktor’s a jackass.

don’t know if he’s soft towards anybody but we can try. we can Try.

friends, old friends, new friends, bad friends, good friends, close friends, frenemies, etc. etc. all of it

hookups !! so many hookups. fwbs, one night stands, whatever.

uuhhhh god. i don’t know. im so sleepy rn. people in the same major or similar majors.

maybe a ride or die.

people he’s a bad influence on / an enabler towards / all around toxic for them / each other.

people he’s fought !! people who’ve seen him get into random fights and were like ‘uh wtf’

fellow shepherds !!

literally anything im not picky.

#wshintro #grief tw #death tw #overdose tw #addiction tw #hospitalization tw #hypersexuality tw #religion mention #mental illness tw

[dorotheajanegilmore]

Closer to you - Chris Evans

CHAPTER TWO

Dinner that night was lovely. Mom made my favourite meal, chicken casserole and it was so flipping good. You know when you don't have a certain food in a while and you grave it so much and then you finally have it and it's so satisfying? That's this. This chicken casserole.

I sat beside Lucy and Joe on the left couch whole mom, dad and Leo day on the right couch. Alex sat on the floor and worked through some receipts for his and my dads garage.

Dad and Alex are mechanics and own their own garage in town. Alex skipped out on college, he's been working on bikes and cars since he could walk and so my dad decided to go into business with him a year or two ago.

My mother is an interior decorator and artist. You'll either find her in paint stores or furniture stores and then you'll see her in her paint splashed dungarees, holding  four books of paint swatches and fabric samples.

My sister Lucy is a nurse and works at the local hospital. Her husband Leo is a high school teacher who teaches french, which comes in handy when I want to talk to him and Lucy in private in front of family members. And Joe, well Joe's 6 so he's whatever he wants to be.

Holly is a therapist in the city, she has her own office and clients and is a full on boss lady. Her boyfriend Penn is an attorney at a big firm a few blocks away from her office.

Teegan also works in the city, as a freelance photographer. Her photos have been featured in big magazines and she's working on her own exhibit at a small museum right now.

Chloe is a fashion designer who's trying to get her boss to take a look at her sketch book, however it's kind of a Devil Wears Prada situation and her boss is ignorant unless she wants coffee or an Advil. Chloe's boyfriend Jonas is a builder and works around the city doing various things.

It's hard to believe we've all got grown up jobs. Even though my next birthday I turn *cough* thirty *cough* I still feel like a fifteen year old high school student with pink streaks in my hair and working Saturday's at the Dairy Queen.

As we all crowded around the tv in the living room, the fireplace crackling in the background, watching Home Alone, the door bell rang.

My mother was busy creating interior designs on her iPad, my dad was captures by the booby traps set by young Kevin McAllister and my sister gave me a sharp elbow, telling me I had to go. With a roll of my eyes I let my fluffy socks hit the hard wood floors.

I stepped out into the hall and closed the living room door behind me not to let all the heat out of the front door. I pressed my hands to the solid wood door and peered up through the peep hole. As soon as I saw who it was I stepped back down in panic. It was the hot guy from next door. I had just washed all of my makeup off in the shower! My hair was a wet scraggly mess and my pyjamas had Rudolph on them.

Not wanting to leave him I the cold I sighed and twisted the key in the lock. I pulled the door back and acted surprise. "Hi."

"Hi, uh Alessia right?" He asked, pointing at me casually, while holding a small shoe box that had been decorated with Christmas paper.

I nodded and pointed back. "Lisa's son right?"

"Chris." He shrugged and chuckled.

"Nice to meet you properly, Chris." I said and he nodded.

"And you. Uh I just found the box my grandma left you and thought I should bring it over." He held it out to me and I took it.

"Thank you. Do you know what's in here?" I wondered out loud.

Chris shrugged. "No, Nana never said. It's intriguing though."

"Well would you like to come in and go through it with me?" I offered.

"Oh I wouldn't want to intrude." He shook his head politely.

"It wouldn't be intruding, it's me inviting."

"Well..." He stepped back and glanced over at his house before nodding. "Sure, it would be nice."

I stepped back and pulled the door open for him to come in. His sneakers left snow on the welcome mat and he hung his jacket up on the hook.

I closed the door and gestured to the door beside the living room door. He went first and stepped into Joe's playroom. We walked through the playroom until we got to the study. A small room at the back of the house that was lined with bookshelves that were full of the classics. Apart from one wall which left room in the middle for a fireplace and a tv. The fireplace was fake, we could t risk all of these books being caught ablaze. It was just cosy.

A large grey couch was placed in the middle of the room, filled with blankets and comfy plump pillows. A small bar cart  was at the back of the room with sachets of hot chocolate, teabags, various mugs and a tea kettle. My dads hot chocolate station. This room was the epitome of cosy.

"Wow, this is the most homely cosy room I have ever been in." Chris chuckled as he sat at the far end of the couch, his eyes frantically searching the room in wonder and awe.

"Yeah, my dad designed it when I was 12. I was the most anxious kid you'd ever meet. It really helped me."

"You struggled with anxiety?" Chris asked, taking interest in me.

I nodded, feeling strangely comfortable with him. "I had knee surgery when I was young so I took quite some time away from school. I spent six months in the house so when I finally went back to mainstream school and going back to stores and being around strangers and crowds, it hit me hard." I sat down on the couch, leaving a comfortable metre.

"I couldn't even imagine. You're really strong for going through that so young." Chris put a comforting hand on my shoulder absentmindedly. When he realised he had touched me he tended up and awkwardly removed his hand. "Sorry about that."

I shrugged. "It's fine, thank you for trying to comfort me. I appreciate it. Now, let's get into this shall we."

He nodded and I began to pick the edge of the brown tape sealing the two sides of the box. With a great pull the tape lifted and the two sides opened. I placed the box between us and pulled the sides back.

"Oh my god." I giggled as I saw the familiar white paper. "Cheryl always has this fancy paper on her kitchen counter-"

Chris nodded like an excited child, his cheeks becoming flushed. "Yes, for her recipes!"

We each took a sheet and read over them. "I must've asked a good thirty times for her blueberry pie recipe."

"Looks like the nagging was worth it." He chuckled as he pulled out a chunk of paper. He flipped through and nodded. "Yep. All of Nana's recipes. You lucky cookie."

"Well now I have to go to the store don't I." My smile was wild as I remembered all of the hours I spent baking with sweet Cheryl.

"Why's that?" Chris wondered out loud.

"I need baking supplies. Tomorrow's gonna be a busy one."

Chris shook his head and placed the recipes on the couch. "Not to be invasive but would you mind if I joined? I could test all the goods, you know make sure they're up to standard." He nodded, pretending to be serious.

"Are you kidding? If you want the food you have to help." I told him and he nodded, throwing his hands up dramatically.

"Hey I wouldn't mind that."

"Alright then." I nodded.

We continued through box, pulling out photos and little things I had left like a bracelet I had taken off before a baking session and my scarf I had forgotten.

"Would you mind if I kept this?" Chris asked from behind me as I slid the recipes into a plastic pocket I had gotten from one of the drawers.

Without turning back to see what he meant I furrowed my brows and buttoned the pocket. "My scarf? Sure, if that's what you're in to."

"Funny." He chuckled. "I meant one of these photos. I know you're in it so if you'd feel uncomfortable or course tell me to piss off but, I've never seen my Grandma so happy."

I turned around to glance at the photo and ended up stopping. The photo Chris wanted was of me holding a baking tray will Cheryl added some last minute sprinkles to the batter. Her eyes were sparkling and her mouth was open as she laughed fiercely at something I had said. It made me miss her and our baking sessions so much.

I wiped a tear and nodded. "Of course, yeh, take it." I said quickly before my voice began to shake.

"Aww Alessia." Chris rushed to his feet as he saw me cry. His thinking was just to comfort me, he didn't care that we had only just met. He pulled me into a hug and his hand rubbed my back.

I hugged back momentarily before remembering that this guy was a stranger. I quickly put my hands on his muscular arms and pulled back. "I'm sorry. She was your grandmother, I have no right to cry over this."

"What? Of course you do." Chris shook his head and defended my emotional outburst. "You grew up next to her. You spent hours with her. Hours that me and my family really appreciate. When she lost Arthur, my grandfather, she was so lonely and me and my siblings couldn't come back and forth as much as we would have liked. From the photos, I can tell she loved every minute with you. You were like a granddaughter to her."

"Thanks Chris." I said with tear filled eyes.

His kind blue eyes looked down at me and he nodded with a small smile. As we looked at each other in silence, another tear fell from my eye, one that had been on the edge for a while. His hand came traveled up and his thumb gently wiped the heat from my cheek.

Before things could get awkward I looked down and then back up at him. I stepped back and put a hand in my hoodie pocket. "So I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yes, of course. What time did you wanna get started?" Great, the subject had been easily changed and we could move on.

"Uh I need to go to the store so maybe like 10-11am?"

"You want to sleep in don't you?" He smirked at me and I nodded with a shrug.

"Yeah well it's been a long drive from New York and I'm tired from...all of the emotion. So yeah, I'm sleeping in."

He chuckled and I reached for the door. I pulled it back to see my mother standing with her fist in the air, obviously about to knock.

"Mom?"

"Oh, hi honey. Uh, Chris?" My mother's eyes shot to his direction and she sent him passive aggressive daggers.

"Yes Mrs Perri?"

"You're girlfriend-" my mom emphasised the word "girlfriend" and I quietly giggled and nodded. Of course he had a girlfriend? Why wouldn't Mr Handsome McPerfect have a girlfriend? "-called and said that dinner's ready."

Chris nodded. "Great, thanks Mrs Perri."

My Mom nodded and turned to walk away, sending me a sorry look. When she closed the had gone down the hall and I heard the living room door close I looked over at Chris.

He was twiddling his thumbs, looking at me to judge my reaction. I gave him a friendly smile and pulled the door back. "So I'll see you tomorrow right?" Pretending I wasn't disappointed. But what did I expect? That he liked me? No way, we're friends. I just met the guy, he's my baking partner. Nothing more.

"Right, yes." He looked and sounded so relieved.

Previously (chapter one)

Next (chapter three)

#chris evans #chris evans x reader #chris evans romance #chris evans fanfic #chris #Evans #fic #fanfic #marvel #chris evans imagine #chris evans x ofc #steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x oc #captain america #closer to you #closer to you chris evans

[thesimplyluxuriouslife]

255: 34 Inspiring Daily Rituals to Ignite Your Creativity

We talk quite often about the importance of routine, and how by having a routine, we actually set ourselves free, especially our minds. And it is in that vein that Mason Curry shares his two books Daily Rituals. His second is focused entirely on Women at Work, sharing the routines and preferences of creative women who lived and created over the past four centuries.

I thoroughly enjoyed his second book, even more than the first which I also found great inspiration. It was refreshing to see so many women living their lives in a variety of different ways, but all in which they discovered worked well for them and the craft they most loved.

Not all of the ideas resonated with me, but it was wonderful to get into the minds for a moment of these women and how they approached their days. I highlighted vigorously from beginning to end, and would like to share 34 daily routines to consider to enable your creative ideas to flow freely and without withdrawal.

Some will speak to you, some will not, but each one is inspired by a woman's routine which is shared in the book: Daily Rituals: Woman at Work - 143 artists on how they paint, write, perform, direct, choreograph, design, sclpt, compose, dance, etc.

~Be sure to tune into the audio version of the podcast where much more discussion takes place on each point. 

1.Begin with a hot glass of lemon water

Designer Elsa Schiaparelli woke up at 8 am, sipped lemon-juice-and-water and a cup of tea for breakfast as she read the papers, handled private correspondence, made telephone calls and gave the menus of the day to the cook.

2. Wake up early if that is when your creativity is most fruitful

—Lillian Hellman would wake up at 6am.

—Marie Bashkirtseff would wake up at 6am

—Maggie Hambling wakes up at 5am each morning

"I get up between three or four o'clock in the morning, because that's my best writing time." —Octavia Butler

3. If spending less time with people fuels your creativity, embrace it fully

"I enjoy people best if I can be alone much of the time. I used to worry about it because my family worried about it. And I finally realized: This is the way I am. That's that." —Octavia Butler in 1998

4. If traditional "holidays" don't work for you, create your own, or dive into what you love.

Coco Chanel worked six days a week, and dreaded Sundays and holidays. As she told one confidant, "That word, 'vacation,' makes me sweat."

5. Greet the day in a habitual way that sets the tone for a great day

6. Live your ideas, don't talk about them

"People would sit around and talk about things constantly. I never really went in for that. If you talk something out, you will never do it. You can spend every evening talking with your friends and colleagues about your dreams, but they will remain just that —dreams." —choreographer Martha Graham

7. Keep a small journal next to your bed to capture ideas

"I always have notebook and pencil on the table at my bedside. I may wake up in the middle of the night with something I want to put down." —American poet Edna St. Vincent Millay

8. If you work at home, carve out a part of the day to get out of the house and just absorb inspiration or let go of the day completely 

"In the nocturnal evening, I get the hell out to some movie or damn play and I come back and sleep like a rock." —Frida Kahlo

9. Figure out the ingredients that are needed to let the ideas find you

To develop a new work of choreography, Agnes de Mille needed 'a pot of tea, walking space, privacy and an idea'.

10. Don't feel obligated to keep the same schedule when you are in the middle of creating your art or craft

Margaret Bourke-White required long periods of solitude to write, with as few interruptions as possible." In an interview with a Life photographer Nina Leen, Leen remembers after asking her if she would have lunch with her, "She told me she was writing a book and there was no hope of a lunch for several years.

11. Don't feel bad for loving your work and working on what you love beyond the traditional work hours.

"Everything seems petty and uninteresting, everything except my work . . . ". Russian-born painter and sculptor Marie Bashkirtseff

12. Do something during the day that is relaxing and keeps you present

'I relax before lunch by arranging flowers . . . When these are all beautifully arranged in bowls and vases, it's usually lunch time." —English actress Gertrude Lawrence

13. Have a studio or space of your own to create

"The most important thing is to have a studio and establish and preserve its atmosphere." —Agnes Martin

14. If you love solitude, embrace it 

"But it is, as Yeats said, a 'solitary sedentary trade.' And I did a lot of gardening and cooked my own food, and listened to music, and of course I would read. I was really very happy. I can live a solitary life for month at a time, and it does me good." —poet Katherine Anne Porter

15. Trust your intuition as to what works best for you

"It's not right if it doesn't feel right." —English painter Bridget Riley

16. Find regular time to just read what you love

Rachel Whiteread [English sculptor] would "at some point stop for lunch, and she'd often spend an hour of the day reading sitting in a comfortable chair away from her desk.

17. Establish a flexible routine to work with what you need

Morning routine: "Zittel feeds her chickens, waters plants, and performs other outdoor chores before meditating, taking a shower, making breakfast and getting dressed. In the winter, Zittel's morning schedule reverses: She meditates, showers and eats breakfast first; then, once the sun has raised the outdoor temperature, she heads out on her hike and does chores. 'It's really all about establishing a flexible routine."Andrea Zittel, an American artist, in 2017

18. Don't quit trying to live the life you wish to live

"It never occurred to me that I couldn't live the life I wanted to lead. It never occurred to me that I could be stopped . . . I had this very simple view: that the reason people who start out with ideals or aspirations don't do what they dream of doing when they're young is because they quit. I thought, well, I won't quit." —Susan Sontag

19. Try a crossword puzzle like Joan Mitchell

20. Determine what view in your studio/sanctuary/work space is most productive for inspiration

"Where do I write? In a Morris chair beside the window, where I can see a few trees and a patch of sky, more or less blue." —Kate Chopin, American writer

21. End the day with a signal to your mind to relax

"During the performance I drink water with breadcrumbs, which is most refeshing. After the ballet I have a bath as soon as possible. Then I go out to dinner, as by that time I have an unmerciful hunger. When I get home I drink tea." —Russian prima ballerina Anna Pavlova

22. Let baths be your creative muse

"Baths also played a part in her creative process - a post-breakfast bath enjoyed regularly by Virginia Woolf.

23. Let lunch be a true mid-day break

At 1:00 p.m., Hambling has lunch, takes her Tibetan terrier, Lux, for a walk, and switches on the television to satisfy her tennis addiction.

24. Write when inspiration hits - even if it is in bed in the morning so as not lose the ideas. 

25. Go outside and breathe in the fresh air

"Fresh air and cold water are my stimulants." —Harriet Martineau - the first female sociologist

26. Enjoy someone's company for tea, lunch or a walk regularly 

Emily Post would regularly welcome a guest or two for tea in the afternoon.

27. It's okay for your personal time to be less than what others feel is acceptable 

"It seems to me you have to have your personal life organized so that it takes as little of your time as possible. Otherwise you can't make your art." –Eleanor Antin

28. Don't expect the routine to come naturally, create one and stick with it as it enables you to flourish

29. Cook and walk

"The only other essential component of her day is a twice-daily walk with her dog, during which she avoids thinking about her writing project. In the evening, she makes herself a simple dinner and goes to bed at 10:00 or 11:00 p.m.." —Isabel Allende

30. Create space for your ideas to be seen 

"Open a gap for them, create a space. Be patient." — Hilary Mantel

"I think the way to become inspired is to empty your mind and let things come into your mind."  —Joan Jonas

31. Do you and don't apologize

"I live here as in Paris. I rise every day at 5 o'clock; I drink my two large glasses of hot water; I take my coffee; I write when I am alone, which is rare; I do my hair in company; I dine every day with the king, chez lui, or with him and les seigneurs. I make calls after dinner; I go to the theater; I return to my place at ten o'clock; I drink my hot water , and I go to bed." —Marie-Thérèse Rodet Geoffrin, a major salonniéres of the French Englightenment

32. Turn on music paired with your favorite drink to start the day

"I wake about nine, turn on the symphony and have juice, fruit and a pot of black coffee . . . " —Grace Hartigan, American painter

33. Leave evenings open for your social engagements

"In the evening, she would see a friend for dinner or attend another social engagement. But the real key to this perfect writing day, she said, was to know that the following day would be exactly the same." —Eudora Welty

34. Be patient until you find what works, then cherish it

"Trial and error, and then when you've found your needs, what feeds you, what is your instinctive rhythm and routine, then cherish it." —novelist Doris Lessing

~SIMILAR POSTS/EPISODES YOU MIGHT ENJOY:

~Why Not . . . Be Creative?

~The Benefit of Daily Rituals

~The Importance of a Daily Routine & How to Create One You Love, episode #164

Petit Plaisir:

~Chilled Cucumber and Yogurt Soup with Dill and Fresh Mint, a Patricia Wells recipe, click here for the recipe

~Why Not . . . Grow a(n) Herb Garden?

~Check out TSLL's IG account, see the Highlights and Part 3 of my FR Trip '18 - mid-roll to see the presentation of the dish in Provence.

~Chilled Cucumber and Yogurt Soup with Dill and Fresh Mint, enjoyed in Provence with Patricia Wells and the other cooking class students during the summer of 2018~

~the same dish served this past weekend as the second course during a dinner party at my home. Cool and crisp cucumber and yogurt soup.~

Tune in to the latest episode of The Simple Sophisticate podcast

#tsllpodcast thesimplesophisticate

[lovemesomesurveys]

Can you iron? I’ve never had to, but I’m sure I probably could. Can you work the microwave? Yes, me and the microwave go way back. I don’t cook, but I can zap up something in the microwave like a pro. ha. Can you work the washing machine? I’ve never had to. Is anybody in your house sleeping? My parents. Are you older or younger than fifteen? I’m soon to be twice that. D:

Do you have any friends that got married within the past year? No. When was the last time you used a pair of ear/headphones? Right now. Have you ever tried to count to infinity? No, of course not. Do you like making mixed CD’s? I used to do that all the time before the days of Spotify. Would you want to live forever if it meant being a tree? Nah. What would you do tomorrow if you had $500? Save it for my birthday and go somewhere fun. Did you have an easy-bake oven when you were little? Yes. Have you ever seen a donkey? Yeah. Have you ever made out in a hot tub? No. Are you happy with your weight? No. I’m way too thin. If you could move out right now, would you? No. Do you go to church? If so, do you actually pay attention? I don’t. :/ Do you always flush the toilet after you use it? Of course. Ever wish you had a different family? No! Have you ever smoked pot? Yes, a few times. Ever been drunk? Yes, many times. Are there any wrappers/empty beverage containers on your desk/some surface in your room? Yeah, an empty Starbucks Frappuccino bottle. Do you find facial hair attractive or unattractive? I find some facial hair attractive.  If you could move somewhere else would you? Absolutely. We want to, we just haven’t been able to as of yet. Do you have any siblings? Yes, two brothers. Wearing any jewelry? Nope. How tall are you? Like 5′4. Where were you born? California. Do you still live there? Yep. How do you think tomorrow will be? Just another day. Have you dated both sexes? No. Is there anyone who you think you deserve an apology from? And do you think you’ll ever get it? No. What were the last words you said to your Dad? “Goodnight.” Does it bother you when people bring up your past? Depends what they’re bringing up. Name something you disliked about the day you had today? It’s only 2:33AM, not a whole lot has happened so far. Have you cuddled with someone you weren’t dating? Yes. Can you take pills without thrusting your head backwards? I can’t take pills--period. I have to crush them. The last plane you were on, where was it going? From Georgia to California. Who has the ability to hurt you the most emotionally? My loved ones. Are you a really understanding person? I think so. Do you think relationships are difficult? They can be. Do you have a pair of Beat headphones? No. The earbuds I had broke a couple years ago and I haven’t been able to get a new pair. :( How was your week? Same old, same old. <<< What brand of chapstick do you use? EOS. Are you the type of person that enjoys getting hugs? Depends on from who. Do your socks say anything on them? Nope, they’re just black. Will you be buying concert tickets any time soon? Doubtful, but I do want to see the Jonas Brothers in October. We’ll have to see. When you smile, are you confident? No. Have you ever not done something because you were afraid of getting in trouble? Yes. Would you rather have an orange, red or gray bedroom? Gray, I guess. Have you ever gone to a private school? My UC is. Does your house have security cameras? Yes. Does a popsicle sound good right now? No. I’m not a popsicle person. What did you do for your 17th birthday? I don’t remember. What do you use to get rid of bad breath? Brush my teeth or chew gum. Is there something bothering you right now? Yes. Who last sent you a text msg? My dad. What about the last movie you saw at the cinema? Was it good? Aladdin. Yes, I enjoyed it. Do you attend school, college, or university? I’m done with school. What do you study, wherever you study? I majored in psychology. What industry do you want to be a part of when you’re older? "When I’m older...” I am older and I have no idea. :/ Who was the last person to IM you? I don’t recall. When was the last time you received a black eye? How’d you get it? Never have. When’s the last time you wore a wig? Years ago for a costume. <<< Why were you last hospitalized? I had surgery. Do you think glasses make someone instantaneously nerdy? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without food? Not counting the times I was sedated after surgery or wasn’t able to eat after one for a couple days, I’ve only gone a day without anything because I was sick or had appetite/stomach issues. I’ve gone days with just very little for the same reasons. Have you ever donated to a charity? Yeah. What was the last name of your third grade teacher? Mrs. Wattell. Have you ever been to Disneyland or Disney World? Disneyland. Would you ever go backpacking across any country? No. Have you ever gone backpacking across any country? No. Do you hate tourists? I’m such a tourist, soo.

Would you prefer to travel around the world by yourself or with a friend? I definitely couldn’t go alone. I’d take my mom and brother. When was the last time you had a house party? I had one for my birthday about 4 years ago. Do you like bread sticks? Yeah. Do you usually wear shorts around your house all year long? No. I wear leggings all year long. Do you know what Je means in French? “I.” Do you prefer analogue or digital clocks? Digital. What state were you born in? California. How far away do you live from your birthplace? Like 10 minutes from the hospital. Do you have a weak stomach? Yes. Do you know anybody who has been diagnosed with cancer? Yes. Would you ever meet someone in person that you met online? Maybe. Have you ever been to an art gallery? Yep, a few. Do you visit your town’s library often? No. What flavor was the last ice cream you ate? It’s been awhile, I don’t recall. Who was the last person you spoke to on the phone? My mom. ^What did you talk about? She was just telling me something real quick. How was the last chicken you ate cooked? It was chicken tenders. What colors are on your country’s national flag? Red, white, and blue. What is so appealing about ‘Twilight’? I was into it back when it first came out. I don’t know, I just got sucked (ha) into the whole Vampire thing and I’m already a sucker for the romance. Have you ever considered becoming a lawyer? No. What state is Harvard in? Massachusetts.  What is your favorite kind of chip? Doritos. What grade did you have your first boyfriend? 10th. Have you ever been told that you’ve lost weight? Yes. I hear that a lot. Do you have the same political views as your parents? With a lot of things, but not everything. If you could, would you hook up with the last person you texted? Uh, no. That is my dad. Do you do your own laundry? No. How many months until your birthday? It’s next month. What are you listening to? An ASMR video. Could you go out in public looking like you do now? No thanks. It’s also almost 3AM, so I’m not going anywhere. Do you like winter time? Yesss. What kind of bottoms are you wearing? Leggings. Was the last thing you drank an alcoholic beverage? No, it was water. Who was the last person to go to the movies with you? My mom. Do you mainly use your house phone or your cell phone? Cell. I never use the house phone anymore. What were you doing at 10 AM? It hasn’t been 10AM, yet. Would you have sex with someone you had known less than twenty-four hours? No. Are you excited about anything? No. Does anyone call you babe/baby? No. Are you wearing a ring, if so, who gave it to you? Nope. Have you ever made a significant other cry? Yes. :/ What were you doing before this survey? Another one. How old will you be on your next birthday? 30. D: Do you think it makes him weak when a guy cries? No, of course not. Are they not humans with emotions, too? If you could make your lips bigger, would you? I kinda wish my top lip was a little bigger, but no I wouldn’t get fillers. What color is your underwear? Black and hot pink. How often do you drink soda? I only use soda now to take my medicine because I have to crush it and it’s the best thing for me to take it with because the taste isn’t as bad. At least not for my pain medication. Other medications I’ve had to take were absolutely disgusting. Anyway, apart from that I haven’t had a soda in over a year. :O I used to drink one a day. Now, I just get a pack of bottled sodas and 1 bottle will last me about a week. I use a pill crusher that comes with a little cup, so I’m basically just having a shot of soda a few times a day. Be honest, do you miss your ex? I miss Joseph sometimes. What’s something you really want right now, be honest? At this very moment, nothing. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? No. Mac or PC? Mac. Are you one to sneak food into movie theaters? Yeah. Well, more so drinks.  Are you prone to illness? Yes, 

#personal #text #survey #surveys

[ravenkings]

Would’st Thou Like to Live Deliciously?: Part 1

Michael Langdon x Fem!Reader, AHS: Apocalypse x The Witch (2015) AU

Summary: Based on the 2015 film “The Witch”. Alone in the vast wilderness of 17th Century New England after your family has been killed off by witchcraft, you, a Puritan girl, are faced with an impossible choice: death or signing your soul away to Satan and becoming a witch. Black Phillip, the family goat, has been looking at you strangely, and you wonder if he is exactly what he seems to be...

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: AU, Dark!fic, MAJOR spoilers for the ending of “The Witch” (2015), Historical Setting (1600s New England), Fem!Reader, Lapsed Puritan!Reader, Dom!Michael, Matricide, Violence, Murder, Poor attempts at writing linguistically accurate 17th Century English dialogue, Shape-shifting Michael Langdon, Michael Langdon is Black Phillip, Nudity, Slight Glove Kink, Sensuality, Selling your soul to Satan

Note: So this is my first fanfic that I’ve actually published on the internet. I’ve tried writing them for years, but I’ve never actually posted them online, so this is a first for me! I obviously own nothing, and I did pull major sections of the dialogue directly from “The Witch”. I’m open to any and all feedback, and stay tuned for Part 2!

You lay on the dirt in shock, breathing in gasps as you felt your mother’s corpse weigh heavily on you. Her blood was sticky on your hands and face, staining the front of your dress. You still held the knife that you had thrust in your mother’s face as she had pinned you to the ground, screaming and raving, choking you with her bare hands, her grief over your dead siblings and your dead father sending her spiraling into madness. The madness that had consumed your entire family since you had all been banished from the Colony due to your own father’s indomitable, sinful pride. 

She would have killed you, you knew, if you had not defended yourself. And yet, in saving your own life, you knew that you were irrevocably damned. With this most blackest of sins, not only of murder, but the murder of your own mother staining your hands, you were now beyond any hope of ever seeing God’s mercy. You were most truly a sinner now, and more alone than you ever were, even in your most despairing, isolated moments. God had abandoned you entirely. It was this, more than even the horror of the act that you had committed that caused you to start sobbing. You lay there on the ground for several minutes, sobbing harder than you ever had before. After a time, you knew not how long, you extricated yourself from under your mother’s body and stood up on unsteady legs. You found yourself wandering back into the house, where you stripped off the top layer of your dress, leaving you only in your bloodstained white shift. You then sat down at the kitchen table, head in your hands.

You began to cry again. As you sat there sobbing, you chanced to glance out through the open front door and saw that goat, Black Phillip, staring at you with his yellow, horizontal-pupiled eyes. The creature who had gored your father through the stomach with one of his horns and left him bleeding on the ground. He was a gorgeous if monstrous beast, larger than any goat you’d ever seen and pitch black with enormous ribbed, curved horns. You remembered your father leading him home the day before you’d left the Colony, boasting of the bargain he’d acquired from one of your neighbors.

“I had to implore the good woman to accept my coin. She claimed she would take not a penny for the beast and that she only wanted him gone. For the life of me, I cannot begin to fathom why. I wager thou hast never seen such a magnificent beast. God indeed smiles upon us.”

As you locked eyes with the goat, you felt a strange chill run up your spine. There was something alien yet sentient in his gaze. Otherworldly, but with a human intelligence. Demonic, in other words. You thought back to all the events that had led you to this moment. The banishment from the Colony. The disappearance of your baby brother Samuel from before your very eyes. The bewitchment of your brother Caleb. The poor harvest. The lack of animals to hunt in the woods. And finally, the disgusting old hag who had killed all the livestock and spirited away your little twin siblings Jonas and Mercy. 

You’d had your suspicions for weeks. You’d seen how Jonas and Mercy whispered and giggled with the goat, sang songs and danced in its honor, accused you of witchcraft before your mother and father while grinning maliciously behind their backs and scampering off. And you’d felt the eyes of the goat on you in private moments when you thought you were alone and unobserved: washing the linens in the stream by the cabin, daydreaming by the well when you were supposed to be retrieving water, feeding the chickens and the pigs. 

In that moment, you knew what he was, and your heart almost stopped. An audible gasp escaped your lips, and the chill morning air suddenly felt even colder. Still, you could not take your eyes from Black Phillip. After what could have been seconds or minutes, he nodded his head up and down in what could only be called a distinctly human gesture, as if to confirm what you knew to be true. He then turned and trotted away back towards the barn. You sat there, the shock rendering your mind a blank slate.

You stared down at your hands, at the blood drying and cracking on your fingers and under your fingernails. You were entirely alone, you knew. And you were no longer yourself. There was no hope for survival in this tiny cabin in the middle of the forest, the source of a seemingly endless stream of dangers. And you could not go back to the Colony. You would be tried and found guilty, either of witchcraft or murder, and hanged within a fortnight if not sooner. Every path that revealed itself to you ended in death. All except one. 

You shivered again, trying to erase this idea from your mind and made your way upstairs to the little straw mattress that you slept on. The moment you closed your eyes, you were lost to velvety, dreamless sleep.

When you awoke, it was nighttime. The silvery light from the full moon shone through the little window in the loft. You lay there, staring at the ceiling, slowly coming to accept the decision that you knew you had already made. The decision that had been made for you the moment you and your family had been banished to this wilderness. You stood up, lit a candle, and took it with you as you made your way downstairs, stepping outside and shutting the front door for what you knew would be the last time. You took a deep breath of the cool night air to steady yourself. Looking to the stable, you saw the goat standing in front of it, staring at you, just as you knew he would be. You walked towards the barn, and once you were within a few feet, the goat turned and went inside through the slightly open door. You followed him. Black Phillip stood before you, his yellow eyes glistening in the candlelight. 

“Black Phillip, I conjure thee to speak to me.” Your voice trembled, but the words came out clearly. “Speak as thou dost speak to Jonas and Mercy.” Silent, the goat continued to stare at you. 

“Dost thou understand my English tongue?” Silence.

“Answer me.” The goat’s eyes were glassy like marbles. You began to wonder if this was folly, if you’d gone as mad as your mother, if you’d doubly damned yourself now without any hope of being rewarded for it. Heart sinking, you turned away. In that moment, you felt an almost imperceptible shift in the air. 

“What dost thou want?” asked a silky masculine voice. You turned around and almost gasped. The goat was gone and in his place was a tall man dressed in black with long luxuriant honey blond hair. He was handsome, handsomer than any man you’d ever known, with a narrow face, a sharp jaw and cheekbones, a straight nose, slanted clear blue eyes that were narrowed, and plump lips that were curled back in a very slight sneer. His beauty was unearthly and dangerous, a weapon in and of itself. You gaped at him for a moment before regaining your wits.

“What can’st thou give?” you asked. The man’s pouty lips twisted into a smirk, and he stepped closer to you, his riding boots clicking on the floor.

“Would’st thou like the taste of butter? A pretty dress? Would’st thou like to live...deliciously?”

He leaned in, inches from your face. You could smell him, his scent a heady mix of clove and pine and something musky that you couldn’t name, a scent meant to draw you in. The Devil is the great tempter, the great seducer, you had been told since you were a child, and looking from his sky blue eyes to his soft lips, so close to your own, you knew you were lost. 

“Yes,” you answered breathlessly. His smirk grew wider, and you thought you saw his blue eyes turn black for half a moment. He leaned in closer to you, a graceful, sinuous movement, until his lips were at your ear, his body practically touching yours. 

“Would’st thou like to see the world?” he whispered, hot breath brushing your ear. Your eyes fluttered closed, and you felt melting heat rushing throughout your body. 

“What will you from me?” you whispered.

“Dost thou see a book before thee?” You opened your eyes, and in front of you, on the floor, lay an open leather-bound book with weathered, yellowing pages. The letters that you couldn’t read swirled across the page, entwined with illustrations of flowers and animals in gold leaf, scarlet, indigo, all sorts of bright rich colors that you almost felt that you had never seen before, so accustomed were you to drab grays and browns and blacks. 

The man, Black Phillip, Lucifer, whatever he went by, stepped behind you and placed his gloved hands on your shoulders. You could feel the unnatural heat radiating from his body, and it warmed your icy cold skin. You instinctively pulled closer, and you heard him chuckle slightly at your display of neediness. He gently brushed a lock of your long hair over your shoulder and brought his lips to your ear again.

“Remove thy shift.”

You felt your heart pound and heat pool between your legs. His grip tightened on your shoulders. With trembling fingers, you undid the buttons down the front of the bloodstained shift and let it fall to the floor. You were completely exposed, shivering from the cold, but even more from a sick sort of anticipation, not that you could admit it to yourself, not even now. He let go of your shoulders, and you felt his eyes run up and down your body, blatantly appraising you like he was a rich man you had once seen back home in England, forever ago, who was purchasing an Arabian steed. He walked in a circle around you, his eyes lingering on your breasts, your legs, the apex of your tightly clenched thighs, humming approvingly. The heat between your legs grew, and you felt yourself starting to grow wet.

Having seen enough to satisfy him, the man stepped behind you again and took a firm hold of your shoulder with one hand and the back of your head with the other. He, gently but firmly, pushed your head down so that you were staring at the floor in front of you. You saw the book and understood what he was asking you to do.

You were to sign it, the Devil’s book. It was the book that all witches signed. Once you had done this, your soul would be locked away into his possession, and he would be your master for all eternity and even beyond that. Your mouth ran dry as you saw the one empty line on the page, the one undoubtedly reserved for you. 

“I..I cannot write my name,” you said truthfully. You had learned to read simple prayers and Bible verses but never to write. You had always been told a girl had more useful things to learn, like needlework and spinning wool and how to keep a good, clean, God-fearing household. The man chuckled again. 

“I will guide thy hand.”

You looked back at the man’s face, which was so close to your own, at his full, soft, smirking lips and longed to kiss them, longed for that more than you had for anything else in your life. He seemed to know what you were thinking and shook his head, amused at your desperation. He ghosted his thumb along your bottom lip, just barely touching it.

“All in good time, little dove. Now sign,” he murmured. You averted your eyes and nodded. You knelt down on the floor and picked up the quill pen, which had just appeared lying on the page. You felt the familiar burning heat against your back as the man say behind you and then, to your surprise, pulled you into his lap. The book then levitated, as if a pair of invisible hands had picked it up, and floated towards you until it was hovering right over your lap. 

Black Phillip took your small shaking hand in his own large one, guided it and the quill down to the page, and, in one quick motion, signed it for you. You watched with strange detachment as the ink flowed from the quill, signing away your life and your soul. You shed no tears, and you suddenly felt a strange peace, gazing at the cursive flourish that you knew was your name. All of the anxiety, the self-doubt, the self-hatred, the suffering that you had experienced in your futile quest to be a good, pious Christian were no longer of any consequence. You could now be your truest self and taste fully of the pleasures of life that you had always secretly craved. 

You were shaken out of your thoughts when the heavy book slammed shut of its own accord and vanished into thin air. You blinked, surprised, and turned around to look at the man. His beautiful face had an expression of feline satisfaction.

“Is it done?” you asked. The man stared at you for a long moment, looking for all the world like tomcat who had cornered a particularly juicy mouse. He shook his head.

“Not quite.”

And before you could react, his tongue licked a hot column up your neck while his gloved hands reached around either side of your body and pinched both your nipples. 

#so i guess this is my late contribution to this fandom #i think i got a bit carried away with the part before michael officially shows up but i think it's worth it #part 2 will be smuttier i promise #michael langdon #cody fern #michael langdon x reader #american horror story #ahs apocalypse #the witch #fanfic #mine

[its-glum-and-dumb]

Introducing Me

Song: Introducing Me by Nick Jonas (from Camp Rock 2)

Pairing: Jack Kelly and Sarah Jacobs from Newsies (1992)

Tag List: @anteachriist @almostoyster @emphatically-enthusiastic @interwebseriesfan24

I'm good at wasting time

I think lyrics need to rhyme

And you're not asking

But I'm trying to grow a mustache

I eat cheese, but only on pizza, please

And sometimes on a homemade quesadilla

Otherwise it smells like feet to me

And I, I really like it when the moon looks like a toenail

And I love you when you say my name

Jack and Sarah had been dating for a couple months and he could tell that she’d been getting distant from him. He didn’t know what he did so he decided to surprise her on the rooftop of their apartment. With the help of Crutchie and Race, he got a nice picnic packed and some flowers picked out before texting her. “Hey Sar. Meet me on the roof?”

Sarah was reading on her bed when her phone went off, picking it up and frowning a bit when she sees it’s from Jack. Shooting off a reply first, she grabs her jacket and slips it on, wrapping it around her before starting to climb out the window and up the fire escape. Once she gets close to the roof, she calls out. “Jack? What did you want me-” Cutting herself off once she sees the display, she covers her mouth in surprise. “Jack.. What’s all this?” The roof looked amazing.. There was a blanket in the middle with a picnic displayed and flowers lying next to the basket. 

“Well, I know you’ve been busy so I thought I would surprise you. C’mon, I packed your favorite. Or, I hope it’s your favorite. Crutch said you liked chicken parmesan.”

“Jack.. This is all very sweet but..” Taking a deep breath to calm herself before continuing, she looks at Jack. “We need to talk. I can’t do this anymore. It’s like you don’t want to be with me. You won’t tell me anything. Anything real anyway.. I understand that you like your privacy but I need more. I’m sorry..”

He felt like she had stabbed him in the heart. She was breaking up with him? “Sarah, please. I really care about you. How can I show you that?”

“Jack..”

“No, please. Tell me what you want and I’ll do it. I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want to lose what we have.”

“I want you to talk to me. Tell me about you. I feel like I don’t even really know you.”

If you wanna know

Here it goes

Gonna tell you this

The part of me that shows if you're close

Gonna let you see everything

But remember that you asked for it

I'll try to do my best to impress

But it's easier to let you take a guess at the rest

But you wanna hear what lives in my brain

My heart, will you ask for it, for your perusing?

At times confusing, slightly amusing

Introducing me

Sarah had given him a challenge. No. Not a challenge. A request. He was going to make sure she knew everything about him. Even the awkward stuff. He started writing everything down that he could think of. I’ve dreamed of Santa Fe forever. I get really protective over my boys because people are always leaving me and I’ll be damned if it happens to them. I’ve never had a dog because I don’t trust them. He went on for hours, writing down everything he could think of before rushing over to Sarah’s apartment. The papers tucked safely in his pocket, he climbs up the ladder and the fire escape to get to Sarah’s apartment. Once outside, he knocks on the window before waiting for her to let him in.

“Jack? What are you doing here?” Sarah unlocked the window so she could push it up, moving aside as Jack steps into her apartment.

“I have something for you.”

“At 1:30 in the morning? Jack, are you insane?”

“What? Is it really? Nevermind. That‘s not important. What’s important is that you were right. I haven’t been real with you. But I’m here because I’m ready.” Jack holds the papers out to her.

Raising her eyebrows as she takes the papers. “What’s this?”

“It’s a list of information about me. The weird stuff that not many people know. It’s the real stuff.”

With a sigh, she hands the papers back to him. “Jack. I don’t want you to feel forced to do this. I understand that you’re a private person and I love that about you. I just need more.”

“And I get that. But what you don’t get is that I need you. So if keeping you in my life means sharing the weird things about me, then I’ll do it. Sarah, I’ll do whatever it takes. Please. Just read them.”

Sarah hesitates, holding the papers in her hands before smiling softly and handing them to him. “Read them to me. I want to hear them from you.”

I never trust a dog to watch my food

And I like to use to the word "dude"

As a noun, or an adverb, or an adjective

And I've never really been into cars

I like really cool guitars and superheroes

And checks with lots of zeros on 'em

I love the sound of violins

And making someone smile

Well, you probably know more than you ever wanted to

So be careful when you ask next time

After Jack had given the list to Sarah, things had definitely changed. They were noticeably better ever since that night in her apartment. Jack was more open and it was rare to see one of them without the other.

“Hey Jack? Have you seen that jacket I bought the other day? The purple one?”

“Yeah, it’s in your closet. On the right.”

“Okay. Thanks babe. Are you almost ready? We have to leave soon if we’re gonna make it on time. Kath is going to kill you if you make us late again.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Jack walks into the room and wraps his arms around his girlfriend’s waist, placing a gentle kiss on her neck. “We’ve got a couple minutes before we have to leave right?” He smirks at her while placing slow, soft kisses on her skin.

“Jack.. No. They’re not going to invite us anymore if we’re late again.” Despite her protests, she giggles softly at the feeling of her boyfriends lips on her neck. After a moment, she gives in. “Oh alright. Five minutes and then we have to go!” Five minutes came and went as the two spent hours together cuddling, among other things. Their friend’s party was long forgotten, along with their clothes, just enjoying each other’s company as the night drags on.

#Jack Kelly #sarah jacobs #newsies #92sies #cath writes #my fics

[thelostpagesofportlyndon]

“...?” Intella paused as she looked at the black hardcover book on the floor that she didn’t recognize as one of her own and Joshel and Jona knew better than to leave a book on the floor… She absentmindedly flipped open the front page after examining the outside to find it was a notebook but the handwriting was chicken scratch at best…  She ran her fingers along the page as she recognized it after a minute as Jill’s handwriting and after a few words she realized it was Jill’s journal. 

On the one hand she considered that it would be very inappropriate to read Jill’s private thoughts…

On the other… Her curiosity clouded her judgement at times as she only managed to close the book for a few seconds before returning and sitting down and opening it.

---

“...Deon bought me this journal for christmas… I guess it’s nice. He said he thought it might help me vent since I refuse to tell him what’s bothering me. I don’t really think writing will help me much but I figured I could at least document what I know now.”

Intella examined the rough sketch on the page… Admittedly, Jill was better at drawing then writing. The symbol was that of a snake that Intella recognized right away as the same tattoo that Jill had on her shoulder since a fairly young age. Jill had simply remarked that her grandmother said it was a birthmark - and although her and Deon knew that wasn’t true they hadn’t pushed it.

“I guess I’ve always been part of Ophidian… It’s not really a choice. I’ve tried to trace back how far and it seems to go really far back… At least to Post Christabella/Paimon.  I kinda want to ask Axel but I know that this will get back to Intella and I just...I’m scared. I don’t want Deon and her involved… I don’t want to lose them. They’re all I got - Nobody else cares if I die tomorrow… Sometimes I.” 

Intella squinted at the pages as Jill had roughly crossed out whatever she’d written but despite her best effort she couldn’t figure out what it said. She already had millions of questions - What was Ophidian? She knew what the word meant but judging by the context it was either a cult or organization…

The next few pages were a few general notes - Names and dates that didn’t mean much to Intella as she skimmed through them before finding more written.

“Everything hurts...Deon’s mad at me for disappearing again without telling him anything. I guess that’s understandable but I figured he’d be fucking his new girlfriend… Agg? ...alphba? or whatever.  The training keeps getting more intense… I guess I know how to use a sword now.”

A sarcastic doodle of a derpy looking face saying ‘yay’ followed before she started writing a sentence and seemed to either fall asleep or something as the pen dragged and faded away.

“I fucking knew it.”  Intella noted the disaster this particular page was with dents and scratches and a few small ripped edges. The stains of tears and mascara on the page made her heart sink a little bit. In the time knowing Jill she’d never cried. She’d been in pain. She’d been scared but she’d never even flinched. Intella wasn’t much different as a kid but knew that if Jill was crying enough to create the marks on the page that whatever was written was hurting her…

“...Grandma killed them. She was ordered to and did it without a second thought! She was going to kill me that day when I  shoved her down the stairs because they weren’t satisfied with my training.  How does somebody kill their own child?  How was my father’s parents okay with this? They were on the council who made the fucking decision! She took them away from me… She took away any life I might had because they wanted to quit! They wanted out of this bullshit!

I don’t want to hurt people…

I don’t want to be a bad person…

I don’t want to be like them.

Deon noticed the bruises and cuts. I told him I got into a fight with some creep who was groping a girl… I don’t want to lie to him but it worried him enough to see me like this. It’s why this needs to stay as just FWB and nothing more… I can’t tell him what I feel because he’ll be in trouble. He’ll try to protect me or get everyone else involved… I know Intella and him could fight them. They’d probably do fine for awhile but these people are insane…

Briggs sold them some sort’ve nanites? I think that’s the right term… I don’t really understand how it all works but what I do know is that they claim the shot holds the fighting styles and capabilities of Rikku, December and Paimon?…  Something about using the footage from Heron’s security and other surveillance? I don’t understand. What I do understand is that at the start of the week I didn’t even know how to hold a Katana… Now I’m fighting at the same level as Rikku does with years of training within a week. I don’t feel good… I don’t know what’s going on inside of me but it hurts.

I’m just going to go to sleep…” 

#jill Bradshaw #intella migatori #intella's library #port lyndon

[acupofsims]

At the Miriano Residence

“Wait, so you’re telling me that when Stef was younger she was afraid of dad’s beard?” Olive asked with a chuckle. 

Denise nodded. “She sure was. When she was three years old she used to cry and cry whenever he’d let his beard grow. I’m sure she thought there was some sort of monster on his face at some points.” 

“Was it super scraggly or something?” Olive followed up causing Denise to shake her head in response. 

“Not that I know of. I think she was just so young and even then she was so easily scared that his beard looked much scarier when he grew it out than it actually was.”

“Kind of like how when you’re a kid you think there’s a monster in the corner of your room when the lights go out, but when you turn it on it’s just a coat on a hanger?” Stefanie asked, seeking clarification.

“Exactly.” Denise nodded in agreement before she continued. “But, I think in your case, you were just easily scared.”

The three of them erupted in laughter as Olive opened her mouth to respond. “That’s hilarious and sounds like something Stef would do. Not much has changed.”

Stefanie stuck her tongue out in protest and followed it with a smile.

“Well, I’ll be right back. I’m going to go check on the grill to make sure the chicken doesn’t overcook.” Denise announced as she stood up and gently pushed the chair in behind her so she could go check on the chicken that was cooking on the grill. She was making her infamous Grilled Pineapple Cayenne Chicken, which hence the name, includes chicken breasts grilled in a pineapple, cayenne glaze. The perfect medley of sweet, salty, and spicy.

As the two sisters were exchanging embarrassing stories of their childhood, Valerie pulled Blair aside because she noticed that Blair wasn’t behaving like her extroverted self. Usually, she’s bouncing around from table to table, greeting everyone or seeing how she could help out. Yet today she was mostly seated by herself, occasionally chatting as people approached her.

“Hey Blair. How are you feeling about all of this? I haven’t really had the chance to check in with you privately.” Valerie asked, concerned. 

“What do you mean?” Blair asked, feeling a little perplexed as to why Valerie was asking her this. “What’s there for me to feel? I’m not the one carrying it.”

“I know, I know.” Valerie held her hands to communicate that she wasn’t trying to cause any issues. “I’m just wondering because you don’t seem like yourself today. Becoming an aunt can be an exciting thing, but I can’t help but wonder how you’re feeling knowing your sister is going to be a mom soon.”

Blair sighed and ran her fingers through her blonde waves as she shifted her weight to her left leg. “It’s hard to explain, honestly. I am excited for her, but part of me is really worried. I mean she’s only known Ryan for two years and she’s already pregnant?”

Valerie nodded in agreement. “That’s true.”

“I mean, Jonas and I have been seeing each other for much longer than they have and we haven’t even had the discussion of marriage yet. It just feels like everything is going so fast that I don’t think she’s realizing the severity of the choices she’s making. Where are they even gonna live? In his house that was originally his grandparents with his older brother?” Blair sniped. “It’s like she wasn’t thinking about any of this at all.”

“Have you talked to her about this yet?” 

“About what? If she has a plan for what she’s doing after the baby’s born?” Blair asked, her tone becoming more agitated as the conversation goes on. Realizing that she. was getting pretty close to exposing what they were talking to everyone within a few feet away from them, she took a deep breath and lowered her voice before she continued. “Usually I’m the impulsive one in the family, but I would never do something like this.”

“I know, I know. But maybe you can talk to her and help her figure this out a bit more.”

Blair glanced over at the table where Stefanie was sitting, cackling loudly at something Olive whispered to her. Stefanie was holding her belly as she laughed, gently rubbing circles into it as Olive continued making some inaudible jokes. Blair broke her glance and shook her head as she turned around to face Valerie.

“Nope, she needs to learn on her own.”

#the miriano sisters legacy #ts4 legacy #ts4 simblr