#someone being cis doesn't stop them from being queer

[our-lesboy-experience]

hiii!!! so uh, this is sorta about 'contradicting' (?) identities in general, but i only recently found out about, like, lesboys and gaygirls and all of that, but what is it exactly? like how does it work? or is that weird to ask? i'm trying figuring myself out but a lot of stuff i've seen doesn't exactly... explain it (or explain it well), and while i guess i do get why, it's just kinda hard to understand it myself for my own identity

also, probably a question you get a lot in a hating way, but isn't the definition of lesbian nonman loving nonman? so then how does lesboy work? like is it for people with more complicated gender identites, like fluctuating genders and bigender? just genuinly confused, my apologies...

sorry for not getting to this sooner- been busier lately and didn't have the time to collect everything I needed to respond!

About what it exactly means to be a lesboy or a gaygirl ('turigirl' is the more common term, 'turi' meaning turian, another word for gay attraction to men. so I'll be referring to it as that from now on), there isn't exactly....one right way to call yourself such. it really depends on the person, but I can give you a basic definition and a list of common reasons someone may call themselves such

im gonna put a read more because this ended up being super long so sorry

lesboy is a term for any lesbian who may have a connection to manhood and/or masculinity. turigirl is just the opposite of that, a gay person (mlm/nblm) who may have a connection to womanhood and/or femininity. common reasons I've seen are:

being multigender or genderfluid

being cusper/in between trans and cis gnc (in between trans man and cis gnc woman, in between trans woman and cis gnc man)

being a system who uses lesboy/turigirl as a collective identity or when identities blur together

a person who uses man/boy or woman/girl as a means of masculine or feminine gender expression but not actually identifying as such

being a trans man/ftm or a trans woman/mtf who still identifies as lesbian or gay for personal reasons

those are far from all the reasons, everyone has their own unique experiences, but the gist is these people may have some sort of connection to manhood/womanhood while still having a queer attraction. personally, I'm multigender, genderfluid, and transmasc. lesboy I find is a nice label to express being both my bigender self and being a lesbian, as it forces people to acknowledge both without separating the two. it's cute and makes me feel validated!

as for "nonman attracted to nonmen" definition of lesbian......it has its issues. it's received criticism all around from all sorts of lesbians in the community. this definition is very new - it emerged only in the recent years, and someone on twitter had date searched it and found it didn't even really exist before 2019. and having that as the one and only official definition that every lesbian has to abide by, when lesbian is a centuries old word with so much history behind it, is a bit ignorant. people who are multiple genders or ftm or bi being lesbian is not even remotely new, going back decades upon decades, and it never stopped existing too. It's a bit weird to have a whole new definition that doesn't include all sorts of lesbians that have been here for so long and just tell them they're not welcomed anymore, right?

that's not even close to the only issue there is with it. it's been disliked for centering lack of attraction to men, or defining lesbian in relation to men, rather than who we're actually attracted to. putting nonbinary people in a new binary of either being "men or nonmen," which not all feel comfortable putting themselves into. especially when considering a definition of gay being "nonwomen attracted to nonwomen," man-woman bigender people are simultaneously excluded from being both lesbian or gay. It inherently overlaps with mspec identity ("attraction to nonmen, which is more than one gender" and "any orientation that involves attraction to more than one gender" kinda obviously overlap), despite people insisting that a lesbian can never be mspec. people have found multiple loopholes in it, (which I can elaborate on if someone wants me to, for the sake of trying to make this as short as possible), and lastly, and term "nonman" (and nonwoman) were found to have existed before to describe the degendering of black people in society. this isn't the only source I've seen for this, but sadly I can't exactly find it (or find it without going back to that hellsite called twitter and I'm not doing that to myself)

oh and as the link points out, defining lesbian by these words also ends up excluding a lot of two-spirit people from ever identifying as lesbian, myself included. which is also really racist. I don't know how you're gonna end up excluding a whole cultural gender that's common for indigenous americans to describe themselves with and try to prove it somehow isn't racist, to be honest

and lastly, some surveys/polls have shown that the definition isn't the most widely accepted by lesbians as people make it out to be. there's this simple poll that someone posted asking how lesbians felt about the definition that received 1,529 responses, and 61.1% of voters said they disliked it. comments gave lots of reasons I've stated already. there was another survey put out that received 211 responses that for any lesbian who had a genderqueer or unique relationship with gender, and one of the questions asking opinions on the "nonmen loving nonmen" as a definition. the average among the group was slightly negative (average 2.838), and reported that the group who tended to feel the most positively about it didn't consider themselves to be trans, with the other positive leaning group considered themselves to be somewhat cis. the group that felt the most negatively sometimes considered themselves to be trans. and of the multigender participants, the average opinion was 2.255 (more negative than the overall average). When concluding, the original poster stated, "When divided by gender, the only groups to feel positive about this definition were "not trans" and "somewhat cis" participants. Multigender participants felt especially negative about this definition"

all of this shows that this definition isn't nearly the best for everyone who considers themselves a lesbian. I know it's been a way to include nonbinary people who are lesbian in it's definition, but I think it really misunderstands why nonbinary people are included in lesbianism in the first place, and just assumes that all nonbinary people aren't men and fails to recognize that multigender/genderfluid people are nonbinary too. and it's not like lesbian has to only have on definition- it can definitely have multiple and depend on each person's experience with it. if someone personally defines them being lesbian around being a nonman attracted to nonmen, and takes pride in not being attracted to men, that's totally fine. what becomes a problem is forcing all lesbians to define themselves like this and make it the standard, or else they're "not real lesbians." it is ahistorical and ignorant to require this or else you'll strip them of their lesbian status, and is really at the end of the day, lesbophobic. especially as a requirement that primarily exists in online spaces. im sure the lesbian who is not at all connected to these circles doesn't particularly care about strict requirements or whether someone is a "nonman" or not. in conclusion, it is not the best nor most accepted definition of lesbian, and deciding which lesbians are valid or not based solely on that definition is pretty exclusionary and ends up policing a lot of lesbians, myself included

#lesboy #turigirl #lesbian #gay #multigender #genderfluid #mspec lesbian #asks #tw exclusionism #tw queerphobia #lesbophobia #I can definitely elaborate on some points if asked #I do have some thoughts I've never shared before

[redysetdare]

I said it once and i'll say it again the sooner the queer community drops the idea of the straight Boogeyman the better off we will all be. The sooner y'all accept that straight people can also be queer the easier it becomes to accept identities you don't understand.

Straight and queer are not opposite. They aren't contradictory. They aren't mutually exclusive. If you can accept that cis people can still be queer then straight people can to.

Straight trans people exist. Straight aspecs exist. They are all still queer. Grow the fuck up and get over it instead of throwing a fit because things are not about you.

#text #queer #lgbt+ #lgbtq+ #lgbtqia #lgbtqia+ #im being so fucking serious right now and some of you will get so mad at this but I'm 100% serious right now #the sooner you accept 'hetrosexual' and 'straight' as not opposite of queer the better off we all will be #because people's identities are complex and there is nuance to this shit #and ignoring that because it's 'too hard' for your small ass brain to comprehend is dumb af #someone being straight doesn't stop them from being queer #someone being cis doesn't stop them from being queer #someone being allo doesn't stop them from being queer #someone being a man doesn't stop them from being queer (r*d fems looove to say that it does) #one part of your identity does not some how overrule the rest of it buddy #At this rate kids in English class are more mature than you because unlike you they're actually learning something

[genderqueerdykes]

in honor of aromantic spectrum awareness week, i thought i'd take the time to talk about how much my personal life and feelings improved after coming to terms with the fact that i'm aromantic. before i accepted this, i found myself in several romantic relationships where i was deeply unhappy, uncomfortable, and made to feel like i wasn't a good enough partner because i just couldn't do or feel certain things.

i've never enjoyed kissing, and cuddling gets uncomfortable for me within the first few minutes of doing so. even hugs are deeply uncomfortable to me unless i really know and care about someone, and even then, hugs only come when that person asks for them. it never occurs to me to touch people this way, the most you'll get out of me is a pat on the shoulder, back or knee.

i ended up dating several people who were very much romantics, and heavily focused on that aspect of our relationship. it kind of felt like torture to me, i felt like i was being forced to live every day like it was Valentine's Day- every day had to be filled with hours of cuddling, kissing, and telling the other person how much i loved them. while not all romantic partners are like this, it wore on my psyche quickly to be paired with folks like this, because i understood how important it was to them, but i just couldn't keep up the performance.

i thought something was "wrong" with me for years and that i just wasn't in touch with my emotions, or that i was somehow embracing some toxic aspects of my masculinity without realizing. it took me ages to remember that i came out as aromantic when i was much younger, but after criticism from my friends, including a friend who was asexual, i stopped identifying with the label, because i was told that aromanticism wasn't real, and that that just made me an asshole.

nearly a decade and several uncomfortable romantic relationships later, it finally clicked that there wasn't something wrong with me, but there was something wrong with the situations i was getting myself into. sure, i love being partnered- i have a queerplatonic partner that i've known for a decade and have only gotten closer to over time. but we've never been romantic. we don't exchange romantic platitudes, and i realized; i've never been happier with someone else than i am with this person.

why is that?

oh. because they don't expect romance from me. they are also on the aspectrum and don't have a romantic partner, either.

this relationship has brought me more joy than any romantic partnership i've ever attempted to pursue. that doesn't mean there's something wrong with me- i was just looking for happiness in the wrong places. i was miserable not because i'm aromantic, but because i was getting into romantic relationships.

romance can be a source of misery. romance does not inherently make everyone happy. we are not all looking for romance as a species. in fact, chasing it makes many people miserable. too many people spend their lives looking for "the one" that they can kiss, cuddle, hold and say all of those mushy things to when they may not even want that to begin with.

i've never been more at peace with myself since finally, fully accepting that i'm aromantic. i love who i am, and i love how i love. i am not loveless, i experience platonic, queerplatonic and other forms of love. but loveless aromantics aren't miserable, either. we are all embracing ourselves in a way that's true to us. we are refusing to warp ourselves to a society that tells us that we all must have homogeneous feelings.

i am aromantic. i am here. my aromanticism is queer in a society that expects and demands romance of me, and this is true of all aromantics, cis, trans, gay, straight, bisexual, asexual, and otherwise. we are here, we are not going away any time soon, and we will not be silent because our identities make some people uncomfortable. we are happiest being who we are.

happy aro week, this goes out to every last arospectrum person out there, appreciate yourselves this week. you deserve it.

#aromantic #aro #lgbtqia #lgbt #queer #lgbta #aromantic spectrum #arospec #arospectrum #aroace #aromantic asexual #aro awareness week #aspectrum #aspec #our writing #about us

[yukishirostar]

So people are talking about a post in the Zolu tag by a certain tumblr user in regards to their issues with Zolu as a ship. They shall be unnamed because i dont wish to bring attention to them and instead just want to focus on their arguments because they're not the first people to make some of these points and so this is also an opportunity for me to talk about these things (a tweet is going around on Twitter containing these screenshots with the username so you can find it there if you need to anyway).

The way this person dismisses the relationship between Zoro and Luffy as a result of needing to pair gay Zoro with someone is too laughable, they must be very fit in order to be able to do these mental gymnastics. I believe that many people who are going on about the Zolu scenes in the OPLA were already Zolu shippers who were familiar with the original story and are enjoying the moments because they were well, really good Zolu moments? And there is actually, shockingly, many good Zolu moments in the original story too which is why many people ship them. Wild, I know.

Then there's 'straight-washed Sanji'. Equally if not more of a bizarre thing to believe. I might make some people mad especially the Sanji stans out there who constantly insist on the 'repressed queer' narrative with his character, but Sanji is written pretty explicitly to be seen as a cisgender and heterosexual character. The way you say with your whole chest that Luffy is 'canonically' aroace but don't acknowledge that Sanji is 'canonically' cishet is beyond hypocritical. If you believe Sanji looking like a 'misogynistic straight man' is different from the way he is written in canon then maybe you should go back and reread/rewatch series with your eyes open this time. If you wish to headcanon him with the frankly offensive repressed bisexual/transgender cliché then go ahead, but that is clearly not the intention Oda has with his character.

There's also the fact that aroace people can uh. Be in relationships. Get married. Have children. Did it occur to you that many people who ship Zolu ship them as an ace couple or-

First thing I want to say here, as a trans man who is 'mlm', can other dudes stop with this idea that women or fem-aligned individuals enjoying homosexual relationships between two men is inherently fetishising or that as a masc-aligned individual your enjoyment of a ship is morally superior in some way. Stop pulling out your 'mlm/ transmasc / cis gay' card in order to justify why your ship is superior. Its cringe af.

But if we are to insist that 'cishet female gaze fetishising mlm' is going on then ironically Zosan fits that the better than any ship in the fandom. It being by far the most popular mlm ship means there is likely a higher proportion of people who identify as cishet women who ship it. Its also the classic 'two men who dislike/hate eachother and have a toxic relationship but hot sexual tension' slash/yaoi stereotype. Majority of Zosan I've come across is depicting Zoro as the masculine male man in the relationship while Sanji the effeminate twink that Sanji stans project themselves onto and they go crazy for the bickering that is apparently reminiscent to them of a toxic heterosexual marriage. Meanwhile every Zolu/Luzo shipper I've interacted with has been some flavour of queer and Zolu is closest to the 'falling in love with your same sex bestie' narrative that the majority if not every non-heterosexual person has experienced at least once in their lifetime. This is just my personal view of course, but I think noting a difference in perspective on this topic is interesting and reveals that at the end of the day this is totally subjective and based purely on anecdotes.

Also it's just a very weird point here that apparently OP has 'plenty of varied queer rep' (it actually doesn't have that many canonical queer characters in relation to its cast size but anyway) and other media doesn't so shipping aroace characters in gay relationships is valid in those but not in One Piece … HUH???? So you're saying if One Piece had 'less' queer rep, then Zolu would be fine to ship? Idek my brain hurts.

"I have black friends so I'll speak for the black community and get offended for them" (btw this person then proceeded to block aroace people who had issues with their depiction of aroace people).

Also if we're talking canonical depictions, the only thing Zoro has been canonically depicted as is also aroace, equally if not moreso than Luffy. So by your own rules, you can't ship a cishet (sanji) with an aroace (zoro), therefore Zosan is now invalid. Stop erasing Zoro's aroace identity bigot.

'Categorically wrong' makes me laugh. I don't ship Zoro and Nami but like, people can ship what they want to??

'The general public is aware enough of gay people and how to spot them these days' uh... firstly this sounds very homophobic. Secondly the general public (cishet ppl) are famously bad at recognising queerness even when its in flashing lights before them. Thirdly you make it sound like Zoro was going around on roller skates and booty shorts listening to YMCA and Madonna in the show. I do agree he was gay-coded but it was mostly because he had sexual tension with every man he interacted with, not for the strange reasons you pointed out...

Its kinda the elephant in the room too but like. These are just headcanons. You can have multiple headcanons and interpretations of a character's sexuality. I can see Zoro as aroace virgin one day and a gay h*e the next. I'm actually allowed, legally, to do that.

The way they think shipping Zolu is harmful to aroace representation when BOTH characters are closest to being canonically aroace than anything yet ship Zosan, label being anti-Zolu as some kind of pro-ace activism, and then proceeded to block aroace people for criticising their incorrect depiction of what being aroace is...

This was a lot of words to say that you don't like a ship. Just say you don't like it, and it gets in the way of the ship you like, instead of writing a virtue signalling essay to justify your reasoning. Please.

They had some more to say on future posts I'll just pick my favourite bits

They really have this narrative that Zolu is only popular because of OPLA and can't fathom that its just a popular ship in general and always has been huh. And they couldn't make it more obvious that they're totally salty about it ranking in the top 100 most popular tumblr ships, lmao.

Your classic case of 'self-identifying ally who speaks over the people they are supposed allies of'. Its a general rule that you feel the need to declare yourself an ally you're probably not an ally, actual allies know they need to just shut up and do the work. Saying 'this character's aroace' and 'I have aroace friends' actually isn't what allyship is, thats just accepting that ace people exist which is like... the baseline.

Calling a wholesome loving ship like Zolu an icky ship is a severe consequence of online brain (this person is 26 years old btw)

#long post #Zolu #Luzo #One Piece #response

[scarefox]

Alright before I have to see someone else misunderstanding this

as bad writing or Playboyy being like 'tall guy must be top always'! No... he is literally complaining about other people who judge him... it's his experience!

He is saying his dating life is difficult because of his height. Might be surprising to some but LGBTq folks can be sexist and toxic masc as well. So some exclusive tops (yes, exclusive tops and bottoms exist) may not like to be with a bottom who's taller. (this mindset exists with hetero cis men too who don't date girls who are taller than them / or many women don't like dating men who are smaller... that is often rooted in sexism but sometimes may just be not that deep preferences)

But yet if he's trying to be the top in the relationship they would complain about his D size. Which also surprise: a big D is not as badass as society makes it seem for some reason. Like at some point it can become uncomfortable or painful for the one who receives.

And the "It's funny" is simply that because his size is ideal for porn and fetish but apparently not asked in RL.

And in conclusion that makes Nuth his perfect partner because he is tall too, is into Phop as he is and likes to switch with him even.

So yea, that's imo an actual realistic conversation here but obviously doesn't get talked about often 🤷‍♂️ And just picking this line out of context just to point finger how badly written Playboyy is... is not it fam... especially if we consider that the director and the writer are both gay men.

(also can we please stop pretending as if the whole concept of topping and bottoming can not be talked about because ????? i don't even know where that comes from?? Especially when queer people talking about their own experiences and preferences? that's not what the top/bottom discourse is supposed to be about, the discourse is about generalizations and assumptions based on stereotypes...)

#the comment I am referring to got deleted by op after I mentioned the whole context of that line #playboyy the series #playboyy #ep8 #nuth x phop

[slasher-male-wife]

Male reader making slashers realize they're queer

Because it's pride month and also because I've come across a lot of undisclosed fem reader stuff I decided to write this. The reader isn't specifically cis but they are seen as a man. I know Adam isn't a slasher but I've got Saw on the brain.

Includes: RZ Michael Myers, Brahms Heelshire, Martin Mathias, Severen, Adam Faulkner and Bo Sinclair

Warnings: Slashers checking out reader, flirting, internalized homophobia on slashers part, reader wears "revealing" clothes (tank tops, shorts, being shirtless), vague descriptions of readers body, stalking kind of, mention of drinking blood in Martins bit

RZ Michael Myers

Michael noticed you moved into the same neighborhood as the Myers house. He finally saw you one hot summer day when you were outside doing yard work. You're wearing cut off jean shorts and a tight tank top. Michael questioned why you would wear something like this as a man.

But he couldn't deny that he enjoyed watching you work. Michael never explicitly knew anything about sexuality. He just knew if you weren't dating someone of the opposite gender, you'd be ostracized. But he couldn't help tilting his head as you wiped away sweat on your forehead while you mowed your lawn.

Michael felt the voice in his head telling him to attack you quiet down as a funny feeling bloomed in his stomach. He felt this way before when he saw something that excited him. But why would a man excite him like this? Michael went through any explanation he could in his mind while he watched you finish up your mowing. But eventually he realized, he might be attracted to you.

He momentarily thought about what other people would say, when he remembers he doesn't care. Watching you work out in your yard made him feel funny, and pushed away the voice in his head telling him to kill. He's felt this way before. But it was brief and usually only happened with women. You went back inside after you were done and Michael made a mental note of where your house is. He's most definitely going to be visiting you later Y/N.

Brahms Heelshire

Brahms was delighted to learn he'd be getting a new grocery boy. Malcolm was annoying and that was before he stole Greta away from him. Now that he's hired a new grocery boy he's been anxious to meet you. The day finally came and he rushed in the walls to the door to meet you.

You entered the house and looked around, groceries in hand. You'd been told no one was home today so you made your way into the kitchen. Brahms follows you and he can't help but admire you. He's gone without seeing anyone for awhile and now seeing you is making him feel funny, like the way he did with Greta.

You set down the groceries in the kitchen and start to unpack them. Brahms watches as that funny feeling only grows. He's only felt this way about women before. He can't feel this way about a man right? His parents would have told him if he could. He puts a hand on his stomach to try and stop the feeling as you keep moving around the kitchen.

Brahms guesses boys can like other boys. He's never though about that before however. Maybe it's just the fact that he's been alone for so long that's making him feel this way. Maybe he just needs a better look at you. Brahms knocks gently on the wall and you turn your head to look over. He knocks again and you walk over to the wall.

Now that you're closer, Brahms funny feeling grows very strong. Could he really like other boys? He looks at your beautiful eyes and wonders what your lips would feel like if he were to kiss you. He watches as you walk away from the wall and you finish putting away the groceries. Maybe he could get you to stay and watch the doll for a few days, or forever.

Martin Mathias

Martin is making another grocery delivery. He knocks on your door and you open it, not wearing a shirt. You give him a smile and he smiles back shyly, looking back down at your shirtless chest.

"Oh you must be here to deliver my groceries. I'm Y/n. Your name is Martin right?" You ask. Martin nods, "Well come in. My wallet's in the kitchen." You walk away and he follows you, shutting the door behind him. He feels weird after seeing you shirtless. His eyes have always lingered on shirtless men and barely clothed men whenever he saw them. He follows you into the kitchen and sets down your groceries, looking back down at your chest again.

"Do you live alone Y/N? Or do you have a girlfriend?" He asks as you pull out your wallet.

"Oh no I live alone. If we're being honest, women don't interest me too much." Martin tries to understand what you mean by that as you hand him some money.

"Why are you shirtless?" He asks, resisting the urge to reach out and touch your stomach.

"Oh well I was just working on building some furniture upstairs. I could actually use some help on building it if you wouldn't mind." Martin pockets the money and shakes his head.

"I don't mind." You smile again and pat his shoulder, that weird feeling returning. It's like the feeling he gets when he sees a pretty woman passing by, but this time he doesn't want to drink your blood. He follows you upstairs and looks into your rooms before entering one with a half built bookcase.

"So I need someone to hold this down while I screw the back in." You explain, showing Martin what to do. He follows your instructions and holds it down while you screw it in. But the entire time he's just watching you. He's heard the term 'homosexual' be used in the past to describe men who love other men. Martin never considered himself to be a homosexual. But now looking at you, he might be one after all.

Severen

Severen leaves his room as it fully turns into night. The moon's high up in the sky and the soft yellow lights outside of the motel rooms shines down on him. He lights up a cigarette and starts to walk. He doesn't need to feed just yet, so picking up a pretty girl is the next best bet. He turns a corner and notices you standing in front of a vending machine.

Something comes over him in those first few moments he sees you. Despite being alive for a hundred and something years he's still denying the weird feeling he gets around certain men. Maybe it's the fact that he's full from his last feed, or some random courage, but he puts his cigarette between his lips and makes his way over to you.

"What's a young man like you doing at a motel like this?" He asks, looking you up and down. You turn your attention to him and smile.

"Well this young man is taking a road trip on a budget and this is the best motel he could find," You turn your attention back to the vending machine, "I didn't know it came with attractive men too." You whisper to yourself, pressing a button. Severen's smile grows wider and he takes a long drag from his cigarette.

"Hell I'm on a road trip too sweet thing. I never knew there would be such pretty boys here too. Now how about we go back to my room and play some cards." His smile grows smug as he taps off the ash from his cigarette. You hear the can of soda fall and you pick it up, turning your attention back to him.

"Well this 'pretty boy' was hoping to go out tonight. I never expected to have company but if you wanna come with me I heard of a great bar near here, the kind of the stone wall variety," You crack open your can and take a sip. Severen's smile only grows when he hears the mention of a bar.

"I'll take you up on that sugar. I'd like to buy you a nice drink tonight." This time your smile grows.

"I'm in room 22. How about you meet me there in half an hour. What's your name handsome?" You ask, taking another sip from your can.

"I'm Severen. I'm also very pleased to meet you."

"Well I'm Y/n. I'll see you in half an hour Severen." You turn around and head back to your room. He can't deny it any longer, he's definitely bisexual.

Adam Faulkner

Adam knocks on your apartment door. He's spoken to you over the phone about hiring him to take pictures of your work for a portfolio. He looks around the hallway, soaking in how much nicer this place is than his apartment. You open the door and greet him with a smile.

He immediately notices how attractive you look, then he notices your choice of shorts and shirt, both covered in fake blood, something peeling up and other unidentifiable stains.

"Oh you must be Adam. Please come in, come in. I'm working on something right now but I've got some other stuff ready for you to shoot." He nods his head and enters your apartment, which is much nicer than his, as he expected. He looks over at your living room and sees a white sheet hug up for a back drop and lots of Styrofoam heads, each with a different special effects makeup look.

"Your place is really nice," He says, looking over at you as you walk into the kitchen. He follows you and finds you in the middle of working on another Styrofoam head. This one has a rotting, zombies face on it, "You're really good at this stuff." He says, trying to distract himself from how hot you look. Adam know's he's not gay, he can't be gay. You smile and pick up a brush.

"Oh thank you. I've been doing this since I was a teenager. I need to update my portfolio and you're affordable and a great photographer. I just need to finish up this one look and we can get started." You say, putting some color on the brush and applying it on the mask.

"Yeah that sounds great. Do you have any roommates or anything I should be aware of?" He asks, more interested in if you're dating someone than anything else. He's telling himself it's just curiosity, it's not like he's gay or anything. You shake your head.

"I live alone, but I am looking for a roommate, ever since my partner and I broke up," You tell him, setting down your brush. Adam feels better when he hears you're single, but not because he wants to date you or anything, "Alright let's get started." You say, picking up the head and walking into your living room. Adam follows behind you and tries not to stare too low.

You set up the first head and look back over at him. Adam is setting up his camera on it's stand, trying to ignore his sweaty hands. But when he looks back at you adjusting the head, he can't deny it anymore. He finds a man hot as hell.

Bo Sinclair

Lester told him about someone coming into town. His exact words were "Not to be a prude or anything, but he's showing a little too much skin." Bo laughed it off and waited for you at the gas station. But when you walk in it takes Bo some effort to not laugh too loud. Your tank top and cut off denim shorts reminds him of when he was a teenager. But it also gives him another thought, one he quickly pushes away.

"Howdy, what do ya need?" He asks. You walk up to the counter and give him a warm smile.

"You'll have to forgive me I'm not any good with cars but the man who drove me here said my car is low on oil and I needed to buy some." Bo nods his head and looks you up and down.

"When was the last time you changed your oil?" Your eyes widen and you press your lips tightly together.

"You're supposed to change your car's oil? Well shit I've been driving it for about a year now. Is that bad?" Bo smiles smugly as those thoughts return, and he tries to think about why these thoughts keep happening. Just because he thinks you're a little hot and stupid doesn't mean he's gay.

"Well I'll tell you what. We can go pick up your car in my tow truck and bring it back here to fix it up. Are you here with anyone else? I don't wanna keep your girlfriend waiting or anything." Your smile returns and you shake your head.

"Oh no I'm alone. I don't have a partner to come with me on these road trips." Your language tips Bo off and he quickly decides what he should do with you. He feels around his pocket, pretending to look for something.

"Shoot you know what? I forgot my keys up at my house. Why don't you come with me real quick to go get them sugar." You chuckle and nod your head.

"I've got plenty of time sir you don't need to worry." As he's walking around the counter at the gas station it finally hits him that maybe he really is gay.

"I promise you've got nothing to worry about darlin' and please, call me Bo."

#michael myers x you #michael myers x y/n #rz myers x reader #brahms x reader #brahms heelsire x reader #martin mathias x reader #severen x reader #adam faulkner x reader #adam faulkner stanheight x reader #bo sinclair x you #bo sinclair x y/n #bo sinclair x reader #slasher x y/n #slasher x reader #slasher fanfiction

[cl0ckworkqueerness]

[trigger warning: mention of sexual assault]

the specific breed of queer queerphobia is just as if not more frightening than non-queer queerphobia, specifically in this case as it relates to acespec/arospec people (terms which will hence be combined into "aspec" for the sake of clarity, see the tags for a quick note about this)

if it's not already clear from my posts, i am very supportive of the silenced, erased, and shunned parts of the queer community. i involve myself a great deal in breaking down the walls that queer people have decided to erect in order to determine who does and doesn't get to call themselves "queer". nothing breaks my heart more than seeing other people who experience the world in a way starkly different from perisex, allosexual, alloromantic, cisgender, heterosexual people, get shunned from a family who also experiences the world in such a difference way, simply because it's not different "enough", or not different in the way they want to be different

aspec people will always unquestionably be queer, regardless of anything else that would or wouldn't make them queer. period.

aspec people should not and should never need to "justify" themselves to attend pride, not just "as an ally", but as someone whose relationship with romance and sex (the act) differs from what is expected of a "normal" person. they are inherently different, they are inherently queer. full stop.

aphobia exists, regardless of whether or not you follow your blatant bigotry with "no it doesn't". you cannot erase your shittiness by following up your shittiness with "by the way, I'm not being shitty". and if you know you are being aphobic, and you are proud of such a thing, rethink the way you see queerness as a whole. you are a vile human being, and should unlearn the oppression olympics. you not only are an athlete in it, but you are the obstacles. you are the fucking problem.

aspec people regularly face discrimination and harassment for being aspec. the comments of "why do you refuse to give me grandkids" and "maybe you just haven't found the right person yet" and "you're broken" and "you're going through a phase" have all been said about gay people, about lesbians, and about aspec people. aspec people face violence for being aspec. aspec people face corrective rape for being aspec. aspec people face crocodile tears claws that intend to "help", aspec people face blood and claws that intend to hurt, aspec people face real, visible hatred. and even if they weren't "oppressed enough", WHICH THEY UNDENIABLY ARE, 1) there isn't an oppression goal someone needs to hit to become valid, and 2) queer people should not be defined by the oppression we face, anyway.

"b-b-but what about cishet asexual people!!!" i have never seen a sentence less scary in my life. cishet people can be queer, you know? cishet people can be intersex (if they choose to identify as queer), cis people can be asexual and aromantic, pericishet people can in fact be demisexual and heteroromantic, and guess what? they're still queer. they still differ from what's "normal". they're still allowed to pride, because pride is not meant to gatekeep.

pride is meant to celebrate our differences, to fight against those who try to suppress us, and to unite those who feel crushed by the heel of normality.

so don't fucking do their job for them.

#not gender related #asexual #aromantic #acespec #arospec #aspec #acephobia #arophobia #aphobia #note: #i don't know when i saw this or if this person was being serious but i saw someone say that ''aspec'' is actually used to refer to the #autism spectrum and should not be used for ace/aro people and instead should be replaced with acespec and arospec? #as an autistic person who is autistic in such a way that makes it literally impossible for me to mask this is absolutely stupid. #i have NEVER seen this used for autistic people however i HAVE seen it been used as a ''correction'' for ace and aro people seeking #community and support from one another. #i don't know if that's still a thing people say but just in case anyone does: No

[daughter-of-sapph0]

I think the main problem I have with finsters fans is that they constantly talk down to trans people. like as if they think that being cis and gender non conforming is somehow more progressive and enlightened than being trans.

like, so many trans people themselves are gender non conforming. I'm gender non conforming. I'm 100% a woman even though my outward appearance is fairly neutral. every single one of my trans friends plays around with gender like it's a chew toy.

even if you're only talking about binary trans people who appear and present as their gender, society still sees them as less appealing than gender non conforming cis people.

to conservatives, the far right, and most of larger society, trans women are seen as men in dresses who deny reality and pretend we're women, and to them at least femboys will admit that they're still men. it's the same deal with trans men and masculine women. have you seen the way people talk about trans men like theyre lost and confused little girls who don't know any better? and the way they talk about non binary and intersex people is absolutely disgusting.

when I was transitioning, multiple people, including cis lgb people, told me that I shouldn't transition because I could just be a feminine boy instead. this is an issue that exists within the queer community itself.

I'm not trying to play oppression olympics, or even say that gender non conforming cis people aren't oppressed at all. I'm not even trying to say "you femboys have it easier. stop complaining".

I'm pointing out to finsters fans (not even finster himself) that the way to idolize cis gnc people while talking down and belittling trans people like we know nothing is ridiculous.

like, I don't watch finster at all. I've seen like maybe two clips from him. all I know is that people pay him to dress up as a girl. and I also know that he donated like $50k to organizations to help trans people. so like, I seriously doubt he's transphobic at all, and I feel like he's trying to redeem himself from the trap content he made in the past. and there's also maybe rumors going around that he's questioning his gender...

like, yeah, right now he's your funny femboy streamer who gets paid to dress up as a girl. but what happens if he transitions and presents how he wants without being paid to? will you still idolize him, or will you cast him aside and find another cis femboy to worship?

you're not being "progressive" by hyping up wealth rich white cis gnc people while dismissing and ridiculing trans people who don't love him. the actual progressive thing to do would be to mind your own business when someone doesn't like something you like, instead of trying to say that they're evil and morally corrupt or stupid for not agreeing with you.

#dostxt #sorry #long post #ignore this rant #most of his fans are fine honestly #it's the ones who constantly talk down to me that I hate #'oh you don't worship our favorite femboy? lol must mean you're bigoted! you stupid tranny! lmao'

[transmascpetewentz]

Intro + Basic Stuff

It has been 5 days since a transandrophobe has been horrifyingly disrespectful of a gay trans man who died of AIDS on one of my posts or in my inbox.

It has been 3 days since a cis gay man has whined about his genital preference in my notes and/or inbox when I didn't ask.

If you're here because someone accused me of being a TERF, please know that I am not. Read this for more details.

I can't think of a name to use on this blog so just refer to me either by my URL or a silly nickname. My BYF as well as a few blinkies are under the cut.

my pronouns are he/him, but any are fine if you're clearly using them to show that you respect me. they/them is generally okay as long as you aren't using them to dehumanize me.

i prefer gendered terms (boy, girl, enby) over neutral terms, but i will block you if you use "girl" in a misgendering sense. malewife and similar terms are fine. also, this is highly unlikely to come up, but please don't call me "queen."

i'm USAmerican, and when i'm talking about issues, i'm likely talking about USAmerica unless i indicate otherwise.

i'm currently having brainrot about: fall out boy, american idiot, red white and royal blue, fallout new vegas, and velvet goldmine (the 1998 film).

i also post untagged discourse on this blog, specifically talking about transmasc issues, trans liberation, queer liberation, and how to be normal about transmascs if you aren't one.

i'm also looking into converting to judaism, and as such i might post about conversion and judaism in general. filter #judaism if you don't want to see it.

i'm part of a system, so it might not always be the same person answering asks. i probably won't post about it mostly because i want to stay out of syscourse.

all original posts are #wentz.txt, asks are #asks. if i ever have photos of myself on here, they'll be #wentz.jpg.

this blog runs on a queue, so just because i post doesn't mean i've been online recently.

this is my alternate account. i have a main blog that i'm ignoring due to harassment. if you have me blocked on my main and try to follow me here, i'm blocking you for your own sake.

cis women are welcome to follow but don't touch any of my posts making fun of cis gay men or i will bite you.

blog rules:

no, i'm never sharing my age on here.

tag filtering: flashing, eyestrain, loud, violence cw, sexual assault cw, pedophilia cw, self harm cw, suicide cw, not worksafe, long post, anon hate, arguing with bigots, fascism cw.

please do not ask me about whether i am pro or anti ship, whether i support endogenic systems, or my views on intracommunity issues i'm not part of.

i'm autistic and as such might not understand if i'm making you uncomfortable. please either block me or DM me and tell me to stop doing something.

i won't reblog your callout post, reblog bait, guilt tripping, or donation post. an exception might be made for your donation post if we're mutuals.

if i don't block you, then i don't mind you following me. i don't softblock. please don't softblock me either, just block or else i'll refollow.

if i have reblogs enabled on a post, i'm fine with anyone reblogging it. if i have replies enabled, i'm fine with anyone replying.

if you're going to send anon hate, it has to be interesting, original, funny, and/or creative.

also, if you're going to send anon hate, please refrain from calling me slurs, sending me death threats, sexually harassing me, or misgendering me. also, please censor the name sh***a, or don't use the name at all in your ask.

i don't really have a dni, but i will block you if: you fetishize gay men or trans men, you support capitalism and/or cops, you glorify the actions of the ussr, you deny that transandrophobia exists, you think that feminine cis men are more oppressed than feminine trans men.

actually, i have to add a dni now: please dni if you falsely accuse gay men who died of aids of sexual assault. yes, someone like this tried to interact with me.

That should be it for now!

#pinned post #intro post #flashing #eyestrain

[polyamzeal]

I don't know where I'm going with this, I think I just need to get it off my chest.

I'm a woman in a great, loving relationship with a man. However, I am also queer and would love to have more no-strings-attached sex with other women. Like, I'm not looking for a girlfriend or committed partner, but FWB would be nice, you know? Or, like, someone's booty call? That's not an unreasonable thing to want and *be open* with wanting, right?

But it's like, no matter how open I am about the fact that my husband would *not* be part of this (aside from like a quick convo so he can veto it if he's too uncomfortable for any reason), I get yelled at for being a unicorn hunter. I get banned from apps for being a unicorn hunter. I get underhanded insults about unicorn hunters in irl spaces. I get friends not wanting to be friends because I'm a unicorn hunter, even though I never hit on them at all. On top of that (and yes, I'm not a fan of this either, but it is what it is), my husband has a one-penis policy, so I get shamed and ridiculed for wanting to respect my husband's wishes, too. I don't want to be restricted to cis women only and I see how it sucks, but it feels kind of unfair that I get shit for respecting someone else's boundaries.

I guess I just wish people wouldn't act as if I'm trying to set them up with my husband when I'm not. When I'm specifically looking for things I don't get in my relationship and I openly state that aside from just saying hi to him once, they literally do not ever have to even be in the same room again. But nope, all I get is "unicorn hunter kys". The funny thing is that he finds women to sleep with just fine without ever getting these reactions, even when he mentions me. Hell, even when those women meet me, he's never accused of the same thing.

It sucks. I kind of wish my husband could just get over his fear of other people's genitals so I could just exclude cis women since that seems to be the major issue, but it's not fair to demand that he shifts his boundaries for my benefit so here we are. I guess I'm just asking this - am I really doing something reprehensible and unforgivable here? Am I just the perfect example of the cringe space-invading loser in a one-penis policy het relationship giving every polyam person a bad name by wanting to fuck a woman every now and then? Am I the stereotype of everything you shouldn't be? I've given up on all of this already and accepted that my husband gets the adventures and I don't, but I guess I just want a post-mortem on how much I fucked up here.

I swear I already answered this but it is in my inbox and I can't find a record of answer it so I am just going to blame Tumblr.

You are not doing anything wrong. I think the most important thing is just being upfront and honest about what you are looking for. Be clear and direct with people. If they insist on making up their own assumptions and accusations then their loss.

That being said, I do think your husband's OPP is quite troublesome. I don't know if I would phrase it as "respecting his boundary." I feel like a boundary would be more like "He doesn't want you to sleep with other penis-havers so if you do then he withdraws his consent to have sex with you until a week after you stop having sex with other penis-havers" or something like that where you can decide what you want to do and if it is worth it for you but how he reacts is on him. This just sounds more outright like 'rule' rather than a 'boundary'. Perhaps it is all semantics though.

Putting all that aside, I would say just be patient as you try to find woman that understand your situration. And are willing to trust you to work with your needs.

#polyamzeal answers #anon ask #polyamory #polyam #nonmonogamy

[maledistributionsystem]

Heyy i have a question for you bro. First of all i love your posts, it's so encouraging and makes me feel genuely better abt myself. My question is how do i make up for a boyhood i never had? I'm 18 and transitioning isn't available to me, my country is extremely homophobic and id simply need someone to tell me my chest doesn't make me a girl etc but i don't know any queer folks irl and it feels like im missing out

Thank you for contacting the Male Distribution System Bark Line. Remember: Mens bodies come in many shapes, sizes, colors, and heights. Being unconventional does not detract from your validity. Your message is in the queue...

hey man whats good!

This is something I've been doing/thinking about for years, and honestly I'm not sure how applicable my advice is, but i'll still try :^)

I grew up real sheltered and closed away from the world, there's a lot that I never got the chance to experience or be taught that I've had to make up for. I'll ask ya, What weren't you allowed to do due to your socialization/upbringing? for me the answers are: Tackle football, watching star wars, playing with "boy toys" from fast food meals, walking around shirtless, wearing "simple" clothes, stuff like that.

Dont be afraid to derive gender euphoria from shit thats uselessly gendered. I still use Old Spice deoderant because it was Boy Deoderant and i really liked the way it smelled when i was 17 lol. Buy "mens" body wash, use "mens" razors, stuff like that! (In america all these things are less than 10$ so im very sorry if thats bad advice for you)

My answer for experiencing boyhood is: Let yourself be free in all the ways you wish you could have at that age. Collect monster trucks, build lego sets, watch wrestling or mma or boxing or [insert overwhelmingly male-dominated physical sport here], engage with hobbies that are male-dominated and feel good about talking to other men online who participate too.

honestly on that note, make a social media account divorced from any of your other ones with no indicators whatsoever that you're trans, just say you're a man (if you specify at all) and interact with dudes anonymously, kinda like you did me here. It's such a quiet and hidden thing to do, but when i was in highschool (14-17 years old for me) it was one of the most validating things i did for myself. I was just one of the guys, because i literally am.

But also, that boy needs to cry. I'm serious, let him scream and be angry and punch things, let him be sad and ask "why couldnt i have this before?". That little boy inside you could use the aknowledgement.

Also hey, i know you dont got no IRL queer folks to say it to you, so i will: having a chest dont make you any less of a man. Wearing a binder hurts my back, badly. So i stopped wearing them and havent worn a binder in a few years now. I still correct people to tell them im a dude. I just let them hang about freely. I'm just a dude with a chest, and i make people deal with seeing that. Even if you can't go around correcting people and shit, i want you to know it in your heart. Dudes have chests sometimes. Not even just trans dudes! Cis dudes get gynecomastia at varying (but usually a bit older) ages and have to get surgery too. Hell, even those gymrats addicted to roids get tit fat that need to be removed. They're all still men, and so are you. I dont care what it looks like, you're still a man.

I'm sorry if this wasn't quite what you was looking for, but i hope you know you're a brother to us all, and like any brother would, i hope you get what you're looking for out of your life. You deserve it.

Be easy, now ☆

#Bark Line #had to redo my tags on this one bc i forgot using quotations fucks them up. gods i hate tumblr sometimes #anyways #it might look stupid or childish to other people to see me sitting here like #'play into gender roles to make yourself feel better' #but im actually serious it feels so good and the unnecessary gendering of random shit isnt going away #might as well use it to make yourself feel better lol

[meraki-yao]

I know we shouldn't compare them because it's not fair but when I think about how much criticism rwrb received as a film and how it was never enough for the audience but the first reviews of the idea of ​​you call it "film of the decade" (I really doubt it, please people watch more movies) or say that people were screaming in the theater during the sex scenes... As a queer person it makes me suffer that the projects made for us are never good enough for the public but for straight films literally is enough the bare minimum to make them scream masterpiece. Again, this isn't a comparison or hate for tioy but it makes me sad.

Honestly, I'm in the exact same place as you are. I was thinking about it a lot this morning.

I don't know how fair my judgement is because I am inherently biased towards RWRB but I also feel upset about how much TIOY is getting compared to RWRB. Granted TIOY has the advantage of star power, with Nick being more well-known after RWRB and M&G and Anne freaking Hatheway, and to a certain degree One Direction/ Harry Styles, but just from the premise... It's doesn't sound as groundbreaking or new as what RWRB or even M&G did. I can expect it to be a fun romantic movie, but I can't see it being something as... fresh and impactful/ meaningful to an audience as RWRB and M&G are.

I don't know how much right I have to say this as someone who currently identifies as cis-straight, but the double standards between queer media like RWRB and heterosexual media like TIOY is very frustrating, It's like there's so many more steps for queer media to climb to "catch up" with a straight media of a similar genre/premise. Even with the ratings, RWRB did not deserve R at all. But I do think we're gradually making steps towards improving this phenomenon. Slow steps, but steps nonetheless. So please don't loose hope.

As for "film of the decade"... I'm sorry but that's gotta be an exaggeration. Stuff like Barbie, Oppenheimer, Avenger Endgame, Spider-Verse being called "film of the decade", I can understand, but this is not it. Hell, as much as it's straight up part of my soul now, I don't think RWRB fits "film of the decade". If we're taking that title seriously, then that's gotta be something really creative and new, something that hits hard. So yeah, you're right. People need to watch more movies, or have better media literacy.

I don't think there's been a single day since the movie was released that I didn't agonize and grieve over what we could have had. RWRB had so many disadvantages: As upsetting as it is, queer media, especially rom-com is still inherently seen as something lesser, which is fucked up, but unfortunately it's where we're at right now. On top of that, the timing of the strike directly coincides with the promo period of RWRB. The strike was for a good cause and achieved great things for actors, it was necessary, but that doesn't stop the lost of what we could have from hurting. So compared to other movies and projects (and not even necessarily just the boys' projects, recent streaming media in general) RWRB had so many disadvantages. If this was a race, then our starting line was pulled back a couple of miles.

But on the bright side, you gotta think: even with nearly zero promo, even with so many disadvantages and setbacks, RWRB still managed to achieve a lot: Most streamed movie on the platform globally for (I think?) three weeks, top most-streamed three romcoms on the platform all time, PGA and Glaad award nomination (and hopefully more to come down the line) and look at us! We're still going strong, and a sequel is in talks. There's never a fair comparison when it comes to things like this, but I said we're pretty amazing, and that's something that can't be taken away.

#anon ask #answered #rwrb #red white and royal blue #rwrb movie #rwrb thoughts #meraki essay

[mordcore]

oh also it just hit me why queer men *and* incels like anime

anime doesn't have the same toxic gender ideals as mainstream usa media has. probably has different ones but men are allowed to not be performing toxic masculinity and not be immediately troped as creepy perverted weirdo who's weird and freakish about sex and in general (i hate hollywood so much).

there's even a kind of anime trope about a guy whos a big loser and over the course of the story he gets to be cool and badass and maybe even the things that made him a loser inspire his power later on (i'm thinking about SAO right now but only got the abridged version in my head so im not 100% certain kirito is cast as an irl loser in the og sao too but for sure the "likes videogames" is what gives him the advantage).

and the thing about men is that there's two classes of men. the incels call them chads vs virgins or alpha males vs beta males. queer men might call them cishets vs queer people. or privileged men vs opressed men.

the two classes thing is true about women as well btw, mainstream feminists these days will pretend there isn't two classes of women but who got bullied in highschool vs who got bullied is by no means random and it works the same way for men. it's about how gender conforming you are perceived to be. are you "a real woman"/"a real man"? or are you a defective one?

queer man and incels are groups that are very different obviously, but they share the trait of being in the class of "defective men". they can't measure up to toxic masculinity standards because they're gay or they don't even like all that stuff or maybe they do but they just suck at imitating it. the difference is that queer men, once they (we) identify as queer, often learn to embrace this second class as liberating and stop trying to match up to societal standards. same goes for queer "defective women" people and when the freaks from both sides join forces gender roles get thrown in the garbage and only taken out to play with and that's why -- in my personal experience -- among queer folks the gender you are or were or whatever doesn't really set you apart from your peers as much as it does in cishet/ "first class gender" circles. or at all even.

but the incels somehow didn't find that liberation and instead hunkered down in their toxic blackpill communities making each other worse. they know they are defective men and their analysis of gender conformance among men has some good points, but. i don't know maybe they are too authoritarian to even consider that breaking social norms can be a good thing or maybe they're too white and cis-straight to even want to join the same group as the queer freaks or i dont fucking know why someone becomes an incel instead of joining forces with other freaks and lift each other up.

to return to anime. i think it's because anime gives what men from hollywood-poisoned societies can perceive as freedom to be a second class man and still being a person.

anime conventions are strange places, i don't know any other places where so many queer and queerphobic people occupy the same spaces. (anecdotal evidence: all but one queerphobic remarks i've had said to me in public (men's) bathrooms were at anime conventions)

(wip but posting cuz i dont trust drafts)

[averygayplant]

Jay headcanons! Why? Because I fucking hate him (sobs in kin) Here we goooo~ (Shout out to @giddlygoat, he loves Jay hcs)

Jay doesn't really have a normal sleeping schedule. My projection of ADHD onto him makes it so that he wakes up and just goes and goes and goes until he crashes, and when he crashes there is nothing that will wake him up again until he does so naturally- at least, not without functional repercussions.

Jay has very hypersensitive hearing that is specifically attune to electronics due to a funky combination of his ADHD and his powers, and it's something he's experienced since he was a child. Unfortunately, other sounds are louder for him as well- So as useful as this ability could be, it's incredibly difficult for him to differentiate sounds if there's too much noise, and he ends up tuning most of it out.

Jay gets mildly staticy when he starts to panic, stressed, or otherwise fueled by anxious energy. The rest of the Ninja aren't super affected by his shocks anymore, and for Lloyd they tickle, but for a normal person it'd be a pretty painful and shocking zap, like touching a door handle in the middle of winter.

Jay is hypermobile- he's double-jointed in a lot of places and just generally flexible in ways he shouldn't be. It's useful for his preferred fighting style (calculated combos of light, fast strikes, speed and evasion prioritized over strength and endurance) but he often overextends things without realizing and wears a lot of braces under his gi and casual clothing to stop himself from doing any permanent damage just by moving around.

Small dogs people are memably stereotyped as aggressive because they have less overall body mass to contain all their anger, and Jay is no exception to this rule. He's literally a human tazer. Oh, and he totally kept the promise he made to Cole in Skybound and bit him when he became corporeal again in DotD, even if he wouldn't remember it. It was totally worth getting flung on reflex into the wall behind them and you'd have a hard time convincing Jay otherwise.

Jay is SUPER gender queer and doesn't have the mental capacity to process it between saving the world all the god damn time. All he knows is that he/him pronouns are great and all, but being called Nya's girlfriend and having she/they occasionally used feels way better than it should for a supposed cis person. It doesn't really matter either way though, because he's definitely into drag and glamrock and glittery sparkly things. (He totally would have done the makeup section of their show if Dareth let him)

Jay is just generally clingy, not just toward Nya but the other Ninja too, and it's largely because touch and physical proximity is his go-to reassurance anchor. It doesn't matter if he's scared or upset or hurt, his first instinct is to grab someone's hand or lean into their shoulder or reaffirm their presence to himself in some other way. Touch is his preferred method to comfort others too, often reaching out on impulse whenever someone is upset.

Jay eventually does end up losing his eye, and there's no conveniently placed time travel to undo it. It was a pretty gruesome and traumatizing experience... for everyone except Jay. He doesn't remember a lick of it. Blood loss and pain makes the memories too fuzzy to recall. Anyway, he ends up going a pretty long time before realizing exactly why his jokes about it aren't really landing and managing to stress Kai out by mentioning he wasn't surprised, since he'd been wondering if he'd properly lose it ever since looking in the magical FSM tomb mirrors- If you'll recall, Cole had no reflection (you thought I couldn't squeeze Lava in here? FOOL! MWAHAHAHHAHA- HACK-)

Jay was genuinely scared of thunderstorms as a kid because of how loud they were, and technically still are for him. It's not as bad now that he understands what the noise is from, but it was a noise that haunted his nightmares growing up. Jay called Lloyd 'bug' when he was little, and Nya calls him 'lightning bug' affectionately now. You can't tell me otherwise. I mean, you can, but you're just objectively wrong

#ninjago #ninjago headcanons #ninjago hc #jay walker #jay ninjago #jay walker hc #he's a silly little guy #a sparky little fellow #a zappy little weirdo #we love him though #we torture him as much as we do BECAUSE we love him #favorite bean syndrome is rough #but if he didn't want to be the bean he shouldn't have been bean shaped #lance's ninjago hcs

[cryptidfuckery]

Your old social media was literally my first ever introduction to anyone identifying beyond the gender binary. In 2014, I was watching youtube videos in the small UK city I grew up in, and your videos were recommended. And I felt instant recognition when you talked about gender things, because I'm non-binary and I'd never heard of anyone identifying or expressing themselves that way when I was younger. You were the LGBT+ elder that I really appreciated advice from. (Even if you are only a few years older than me, you seemed much wiser). So I just wanted to say thank you for being your out and authentic self for so many years. Wishing you a good week. P.S. if you like cute animals, I highly recommend looking up photos of bog turtles, they definitely made my week better.

I'm really, really glad that I was able to help you!!

This definitely isn't the first time I've heard this. Notably, when I was at an anime convention years ago during that time, I had someone approach me and say essentially the same thing and also cry. Wonderful experience, also a fucking wild experience!!

It's one of the things I'm proudest of my younger self for. I was lucky enough to learn through my close friends at the time, but I definitely saw that there just. Wasn't enough information readily available for the people who might be interested. So I dug my heels in and allowed myself to be a resource, because it was important. Most of what I was doing was regurgitating what I was learning from my own elders and community, but it was important for people to have a face to the idea. Someone they could talk to and be validated by.

That was either around or over 10 years ago now. I've identified as genderqueer for over 10 years. I sometimes think about an the people who might have a similar time line just for the sake that I talked about it openly.

That time also helped me realize that I didn't want to go into activism full time. I love it, its important, but it made me realize that it would take too much out of me. Maybe I was able to handle it better because I was still being supported by family, and my only obligation (that I shirked a hell of a lot of) was highschool.

That doesn't mean I Completely stopped though. I'm one of those people you can make the joke "they'll trans your gender." I have a joke that the only people who don't end up more trans by the end of dating me are Very cis men. (I have a theory that the people who do end up "more trans" are attracted to the androgy for a reason, whether they realize or not).

I like to think it's because I know what questions to ask, not to push too hard, but more than anything, let them describe how they're feeling about their gender/sexuality with no judgements. Letting them explore it in a safe space. So my activism kind of happens there.

But more than that, I'm a hairdresser that caters toward queer/trans/gay people. That's where I feel I actually do my activism.

And I'll be real with you, I'm not out to all my clients. I work in a mixed bag neighborhood (old conservatives, young liberals, EVERYTHING inbetween) so half of that is keeping myself safe. The other half is not wanting to put extra work on myself trying to fight to explain my identify to someone who 1) doesn't actually care and 2) most likely won't actually hear a thing i say. I talk to the clients that bring it up, and come out to them if they ask. I'm not necessarily tight lipped about my queerness, but like all of us, at know how to illude without specifics. I let my clients decide their comfort level.

But my TRANS CLIENTS. They are SO important to me. I'm able to surround myself with the people I love, who I can crack a gender joke at and know I'll get a laugh. People I can really talk to about dysphoria, about hormones, about surgeries, about relationships, about sex, about family, about friends, about life in a way I don't get to with my other clients.

Even more important than that, I can make a huge step in their transition that much easier. I had a good amount of freshly cracked eggs find me after quarantine/the pandemic (it's not over). As we all know, it was a huge self reflection time. But I got to be there to be the first to validate their gender through their hair. That in itself can be an extremely nerve wracking process. My trans clients coming to me have allowed me to figure out the best way to naviagte the situation in a way where they feel comfortable and validated. It means the world to me. Seriously.

This is where I feel I actually do my activism. It's not explaining what gender is, it's not explaining pronouns. It's getting to assure someone they're on the right path. That what they're doing is good, and it's happy, and there's someone who's proud of them for going through the hard, hard process. I have people I've now been seeing for years who I've gotten to support through hormone changes, through identity changes, through relationship changes.

But one of the things I really try to stress is that being trans, while it absolutely has it's difficulty, it's supposed to be joyous. It's supposed to be the joy of being who you feel you really are. The joy of being loved for who you are. The joy of loving as you are. The joy of being loved by your community. The joy of loving life. Being trans is the joy of love, and the constant readmission that you love yourself more than anyone else can take away.

I cried a little bit writing that ngl.

Last thing I wanna say is that if I did happen to touch your life in a way that helped you become more fully realized, pass on the favor. The next time you have a friend or loved one you're getting the signals from, ask the questions. Be patient with them. Let them change their answers. Nudge but don't shove. Crack a joke. Meet them where they are.

Do it with love.

#making my OWN DAMN SELF cry before work #this stuff is still. really important to me #this got really long but if you've been here for a while you know me. this shit gets long

[causesciencethatswhy]

The way jimin presents is much more obviously queer than any other member (purely based on mannerisms, cause if you hear joon or yoongi talking about love for a few minutes you can put two and two together). And his overt queerness makes a lot of cis hetero shippers (or kpop fans ) uncomfortable because they're forced to confront their internalized homophobia and misogyny head on. So they find a way to diminish his importance to the other members or villanise to cartoonish levels to deal with that discomfort.

(I'm the anon you responded to with this^^)

Add onto that how a lot of ARMYs seem to assume that just being a BTS fan makes you an ally/intelligent/a good person, and it's the perfect scenario for some cognitive dissonance. Only that JM haters and Tkkers don't seem to have enough cognitive for it to be anything. Even (maybe especially, even) shipping two men doesn't automatically make you supportive of the queer community and understanding of the struggles just existing as a queer person brings about.

They always clamour "but two gay men wouldn't do xyz in a homophobic country", failing to recognise that queer people have existed through so much worse and still have done things wildly more gay than anything Jikook have done.

There's also a lot of them who only see JM's gender expression and "queer subtext" (meaning fashion choices, and the whole concept of his photofolio + album) while disregarding JK's. Like, that man pulled out the most feminine look and attitude in his "bobs+bangs" Calvin Klein shoot. And he fucking owned it. But instead, at least in my perception, the fandom is split on him: one half genuinely sees and appreciates JKs expression of himself, while the other mostly memes it to death and ridding it of meaning. Any perception of JK as a potentially non-hetero man is forgotten the moment he presents as classically masculine again, aka stereotyping the whole queer community to death.

The latter doesn't happen with JM, because - like you said - he fits the common perception of a gay man. Which is all fun and games for the many "The JM effect" compilations, but for cis shippers it starts sliding into homophobia the moment they need to stop perceiving the members as Ken Dolls and instead treat them as actual human beings with all their complexities, faults and incongruent behaviour.

Which brings me onto Hobi. Now, I don't think he gets it quite as bad as JM.

One reason being that there's simply not as many Yoonminers who aren't mainly tkkers. The latter often uses the former to not be seen as a JM anti, but aside from compilations getting spread to push the "married couple" agenda, they don't focus their attention on it. (Also can the "arguing a lot = being in love/married" thing plz die? As someone whose grandparents argue every 20 minutes (real numbers) it's the actual worst and not really a reflection of romance...)

Another one is that Yoonminers do not care about original content at all. From what I've seen during my baby army days, they pick and choose everything down to the tiniest detail. So they mostly ignore that Hobi even exists as a possible variable.

Which brings me to my next point, which kinda breaks my heart: I don't think a lot of shippers in general, and the tkk/ym crowd in particular, see Hoseok as someone to focus their attention on. He gets forgotten a LOT, relegated to the fun sidekick comic relief while the ships are the mc's. (Which is why, imho, it's always his releases a lot of the fandom doesn't care about/actively ignores). The actual deep founded love every single member of BTS has for him - to the point they should actually propose - is insane. How can you think Ym is more real than Sope or Jihope? How can people be that willfully obtuse?

As someone who thinks Jikook could be real (2019, I am looking at you), I had my doubts seeing Jihope interact a few times. But what gets me is how fucking whipped Hobi gets every time he watches Jikook be all adorable. He looks at them like the proud BFF who got them together. A lot of that is his general love for the maknae line and his personality, but that level? The instances of it happening?

...

.......

This was a lot. Okay.

Tl;dr: BTS are human beings, also Hoseok is the best person on the planet probably. Be gay, do crime🏳️‍🌈

Even (maybe especially, even) shipping two men doesn't automatically make you supportive of the queer community and understanding of the struggles just existing as a queer person brings about.

This!! Is so key to everything wrong with a large group of shippers and even solo fans. This idea that because you ship on m/m ship over the other, you are no way capable of making homophobic assumptions and statements. To a lot of shippers shipping a potentially queer couple is just another way to fulfill some forbidden romance fantasy of theirs and not actual concern for the lived reality of queer couples in conservative countries.

Which is why the painful torture of two boyfriends being torn apart from each other like star crossed lovers sounds more palatable and realistic to tkkrs than a queer couple deciding to stick by each other's side through thick and thin, despite the risks. It's less spicy I guess, but who cares of queer joy when the dramatics of the other possibility is so much more enticing.

Everytime I see tkkrs make the whole, "being gay in the military is forbidden so a gay couple would never risk going together" argument, a part of my soul dies. I don’t know what's more offensive, the idea that a closeted couple will just forget how to behave around each other after potentially years of being together because Gays and their crazy sex drives, am I right?

Or the alternative explanation that queer people in conservative countries just never make risky descions for the sake of their partners because the law forbids them from even existing.

Both explanations are tone deaf and ignorant of the lived reality of queer people. Its a direct result of straight people dominating shipper spaces. I do sometimes wonder what queer tkkr shippers make of these theories (cause I'm sure they exist as well). Are they perhaps more sane or do they subscribe to this bs as well ?

And oh my gosh yes about jungkook. That boy has very vocally played about with his gender expression and has been the one ignored the most by seriously cis heterosexual fans. This daddy Dom fantasy they project onto him is a bit much though I do think he does enjoy a more masculine cool image for himself as well. Which to the straight mind is confirmation for all their wattpad inspired fantasies of him. It's unfortunate but alas, stereotypes stick , especially those made by people with a very set view of the world.

As for hobi and the ynmner /sope dilemma, I totally get it. Ynmn shippers do tend to get on my nerves from time to time as well and it no doubt does have something to do with the correlation of them to the tkkr subgroup. I have grown fond of the ynmn dynamic since my baby army days I must admit though, because you can clearly see how much yoongi genuinely appreciates jimins presence and how jimin relies on yoongi for emotional comfort. It is sweet, but yeah I don't necessarily see anything else going on there.

Same goes for sope honestly. Nothing has ever made me seriously question them, except the sunshine bf with grumpy bf dynamic they do fit into very perfectly. They also clearly rely on each other for emotional support (Bring Hobi, hes my vitamin 🥺) but yeah Nothing as eye raising ig ? But yes, i can completely see why it's so frustrating to see how Hobi is dismissed within other shipping dynamics similar to the treatment j/m has gotten. Hobi does tend to get overlooked a lot in these bts dynamic discussions when he very much does embody the heart of the group and the members love for him is so heartfelt and grand, we really seriously underestimate his significance to keeping the bts spirit in line all these years.

I love my ball of sunshine who holds and even bottles up a lot emotionally for the sake of his fans and the team. And he always deserves more appreciation by everyone in the fandom (myself included)

Ps. Jihope in that one 2020 music bank live was definitely a 👀 moment lol.

#jikook