#the bbc DID not give her good opportunities

[chiefblossom]

EMPRESS OF THE RACNOSS IN DOCTOR WHO (RUN AWAY BRIDE) IS THE FUCKING TROLL FROM MERLIN??

MY GIRL (Sarah Parish) DIDNT CATCH A BREAK.

#doctor who #10th doctor #donna noble #the doctordonna #bbc merlin #merlin #lady catrina #uther pendragon #fuck uther #i guess she did #i feel so bad for her #the bbc DID not give her good opportunities #still thrived though

[absolutebuffoonery]

PT 3 (including finale): I convinced my dad to watch merlin with me and here’s what he has to say

pt 1

pt 2

---

“They’re loving that.”

“I don’t even wanna know what they’re doing in there.”

-When Merlin and Arthur get caught in the net booby trap

-

Arthur, to Merlin: You’re the only friend I’ve got and I couldn’t bear to lose you. 

Dad: *literally gasps and gapes at me in surprise*

Merlin: Really?

Arthur: Don’t be stupid. 

Dad: *laughs hysterically*

-

*uther emerges from the veil*

“Wow, of all the dead people, he got the right guy”

-

“Was that a reference to fisting?” -the horseplay scene when Arthur threatens Merlin with his fist 

-

“Okay that was pretty gay.”

(I don’t even remember what he was talking about here, but he was right)

-

“Arthur’s unconscious again, alert the media.”

-

“I really don’t know what to make of Mordred.” 

(whenever he said something like this I had to hold in an earth-shattering screech)

-

“Okay, this son of a bitch has to die” -About Mordred, s5e12

-

“I am OBSESSED with her.” -about Gwen after she runs someone through with a sword in s5e12

(same)

-

Arthur: “Just... hold me.”

Dad: *just nods his head*

(I think he was simply acknowledging the queerness)

-

Arthur, during That scene in s5e13: I want to say something that I’ve never said to you before.

Dad: Ohh boy. 

-

His thoughts after the finale (he wrote an Official Statement for his “tumblr fandom,” including the hashtags at the end):

Well, watching Merlin was a much more satisfying experience than when my kids made me watch Glee with them. Although it was difficult at first to accept the way they bent time to accommodate Merlin and Arthur being contemporaries, I got over it because they succeeded in creating a relationship between two boys-to-men who wouldn't normally exist in each other's worlds. In actual Arthur lore, Merlin is old and wizened long before Arthur is even born. In fact, you remember in an early episode when Gaius references magic being necessary for Uther and his queen to produce a son? Well, in Arthur lore, that magic was cast by Merlin, and Merlin was present during Arthur's childhood. But ok, let's give the BBC some breathing room because they did a good job showing the generational transition from the failings of toxic masculinity (Uther's reign) to the superhuman potential of unapologetic bromance (Arthur's reign). In fact, how many times did I furrow my brow when Uther did something stupid or said something weenie just because he thought he was being strong, but he was actually being...alone. When it was Arthur's turn to do something stupid or say something weenie, he had a posse of good bros by his side to prop him up.

Even in S5E3 when Arthur gets the opportunity to see the ghost of his father and be like, "Bruh, I miss you," Uther instead treats Arthur like shit and belittles him for not being a dick to his people. Respect through fear, I believe is what the ghost Uther was preaching. But that strategy was pretty much self-defeating, given that respect through fear got Uther prematurely dead. Luckily Arthur didn't give it too much thought and decided, "Yeah, nah, I'd rather hug my droogies and marry a servant woman and be respected for doing the right thing, so biyee douchebag." In fact I'm assuming the writers created this post-mortem meeting not as merely another display of magic, but as a tangible means of showing Arthur's wrestling match with his own conscience. Even the playful and boyish banter between Arthur and Merlin (and the way they gaze at each other adoringly) is an example of Arthur's determination to part with toxic masculinity, especially when he gives Merlin the opportunity to be right sometimes without getting his chainmail hoodie in a bunch.

  This could absolutely be a lesson to voters the world over, who have the power to put real leaders in office but choose crusty old assholes instead of fresh, young minds and hearts. All the Uthers in the world are giving AOC and Sanna Marin shit for dancing. Can you believe we actually live in an era when our leaders get chided for dancing? For fucking dancing! Meanwhile AOC and Sanna Marin are attracting loyal followers in New York and Denmark, who would follow them to the ends of Camelot, while the same old self-serving ancient curmudgeons who keep getting elected are busy pulling Agravaine after Agravaine out of their bungholes. Perhaps I digress.

  Their parting from lore that is a little less acceptable is what they chose to do with Lancelot. Love triangle with Gwen and Arthur, yes, but Lancelot's BBC fate was less than satisfying. There are many tellings of how Lancelot dies, both with and because of Gwen, but the BBC opted against putting Arthur's best knight at the roundtable through most of this series. How fascinating. And weird.

Anyway, the end: Avoiding spoilers, I'd say the series ended appropriately. My 20-year-old daughter is traumatized by the ending, but I know enough about Arthur lore to know that the end is appropriate and loyal to legend. Camelot enters a new era, Merlin finally gets the respect he deserves, and a strong woman rises to power (I hope she dances). Satisfying. My parting thought: Walking away from this series, I've discovered a new career aspiration. I don't need to be king of anything, but I really want a job that allows me to say, "Ready the men, we ride at first light" without getting bullied. I mean, that's just really damn cool.

Thanks for all of your comments and responses. It's been fun. 

#Merlin #ArthurAndMerlinOTP #ToxicMasculinityVsBromance #ArthurWasPan #TristanAndIsoldSpinoff

#merlin #bbc merlin #bbc #colin morgan #bradley james #merlin emrys #arthur pendragon #merthur #merlin x arthur #gwen pendragon #mordred

[kissingagrumpygiant]

heard you're the go-to for being mean about twc 😈

fwiw, I've done two playthroughs and enjoyed one (not a's, which was incredibly mid) cause like... it's twc. it was never good, it was always cringe, it's just fun sometimes! i will prob play through the other routes too for comparison.

i thought m's route was unexpectedly sweet, but even aside from the questionable characters, the issues with the series are more obvious than they've ever been (i assume bc sera is spending less time on the sequels than she did on the debut?)

so my mean takes!

1. the writing style is hilariously bad. every single sentence is like obnoxiously detailed imagery. jarring hyperbole. sensory detail that makes no sense. let me imitate: "rain begins to crash down as if the sky was collapsing over us. the freezing cold of the water combined with its dizzying scent makes me almost fall over and throw up. ava's eyes are the precise colour of fresh grass but also the ocean but also the northern lights and change tone depending on her mood. my knees give out and i crumple like a handful of tinfoil." once you notice it you can't stop noticing it

2. the dialogue is so predictable. i get the vibe she uses any opportunity to stick in a behaviour she thinks each character would exhibit but it comes across sooo stilted like ok f makes a joke m makes an innuendo a says something really cringe or really mean n is polite but judgemental. wow this is so found family.

3. all situations seem to resolve in the most contrived ways possible? like she wants to cater to all the skill sets or whatever but it's like wow im being attacked. the bad guys will approach in slow motion while i deduce (sick of that word) a way to beat them 🤓 let me throw a pebble to hit the off button on their weapon.... invisibly create a tripping hazard... guess a fact about them which will scare them so much i can hit them over the head.... I'm such a good cop! like girl this makes no sense...

4. this is nitpicky but there were SO many pronoun/coding issues in this book. come on.

anyway whatever it's a cringe trying-to-be-apolitical fantasy romance story so it was never going to be good... but still!

oh my god the 'deduce' options were so fucking cringe im sorry u mean THINK? IM GONNA T H I N K ABOUT MY ACTION? or are we having bbc sherlock mind palace sequences is that the vibe

#anyway agree with everything thanks for putting it all into words xoxo #ask #anon

[writingwife-83]

Sherlolly Appreciation Week, Day 7: Space AU

I’ve never had a huge interest in doing a Star Wars AU for the BBC Sherlock characters, but when I saw that Day 7 had “space AU” as an option, I figured this was my opportunity to give it a go! This is such a tiny little snapshot into an AU that could be incredibly complex, but I hope that any who enjoy SW like what little I did with it. ❤️ and happy last day of SAW!!

Balance (👈AO3)

Sherlock let go of the ledge, allowing himself to fall through the hatch in the top of John’s ship. He hit the floor and lay there, shaking and still clutching the throbbing stump at the end of his arm as he felt the ship take off. The adrenaline was still pumping through his veins, so the pain was minimal, compared to what he knew it would be soon. He shut his eyes, trying to ignore the fact that even as he escaped she was still calling out to him through the Force…

“Sherlock? Maker, what happened to you?!” John exclaimed, rushing out of the cockpit to check on his friend.

“It… didn’t go as planned,” Sherlock groaned.

“You can say that again,” HUDD-3RS commented, having come to inspect the situation as well. “I knew this was a terrible idea. But nobody listens to me.”

“Not now, Hudders!” Sherlock bit back at the protocol droid.

“Well!” she huffed, beginning to shuffle away. “I shall just go and rest my circuits if I’m not wanted.”

John crouched down, making a cursory examination of his friend’s injuries. “She’s not wrong, Sherlock. This was a terrible idea and I think you rushed into it. Regardless, we’ve got to get you medical attention.”

Sherlock sat up with some difficulty. “We have bacta on the ship.”

“Bacta won’t grow a new hand!” John yelled. He shook his head, thinking for a moment. “Look, I know where we need to go, and no arguments.”

“Oh? And where is that?”

“The one person who always manages to see through your Bantha crap… I’m taking you to Molly.”

“You are no sister of mine!”

“But I am. I am your sister. Search your feelings, brother. You know it to be true!”

“No… no.”

“Join me, Sherlock. Just think of how powerful we could be together! The entire galaxy would bow before us! You don’t know the power of the Dark Side… but I can teach you.”

“There is nothing I wish to learn from you!”

“But don’t you remember, Sherlock? Remember when we were small, how much fun we used to have, playing together. We could be that happy and free again. Oh, how I used to love making you laugh…”

Sherlock jolted awake to find lights shining down above him, and he could hear the soft whirring of machinery, prompting him to turn his head on the table where he lay.

Molly.

She was working with her back to him; that comfortingly familiar dark hair braided down her back against the backdrop of the gray jumpsuit she always wore at her shop. He was never sorry to see her, but he was sorry it was under these circumstances.

“Oh, you’re awake,” Molly commented as she turned around and crossed the room to him. “How are you feeling? I’ve already given you something for the pain.”

“I’m fine.”

“Good.” She paused. “John will be back soon. He just went to get some supplies for the ship. And I’m just finishing up on your hand. Well, I mean your new hand.”

Sherlock turned his gaze back to the ceiling, feeling like more of a fool than he ever had in his life. How had he not felt it before? How had he missed it?

“I’m glad you’re safe.”

Sherlock shifted his gaze to look at her again. Her eyes were glistening ever so slightly, and she turned quickly away to retrieve what she’d been working on, returning to the table with the mechanical hand.

Molly Hooper was the best engineer he knew. Medical engineer, more specifically. She could find the problem in anything with working parts, including humans, and could usually fix it too. But she was more than that to him. She was a safe place, a hiding place, a place where he felt truly seen. Many times over the years he’d questioned whether she was in fact Force sensitive, but she truly wasn’t. It wasn’t about that and perhaps that’s what made her special. Everything about her that had always been so impressive to him came straight from her own heart, without the need to harness some outside Force.

Molly cleared her throat, holding up the mechanical hand as he sat up on the table. “I had this already, so it didn’t take long to make a few adjustments so it would work for you. It’s nothing special, but it’ll do until I can make one that includes artificial flesh and skin.”

“It’s fine,” Sherlock replied flatly. “Best get this done so I can get back to work.”

“Tell me if it hurts, ok?” She placed the machinery against his wrist and began the process of fusing it with his existing nerves and muscles. “So… John said you’ve abandoned the Jedi.”

“Becoming a Jedi Master was the path my family wanted for me,” Sherlock explained, seeing his home planet explode and splinter into a billion tiny pieces all over again in his mind’s eye. “I was never meant to be a Jedi. Especially not now. You see, a Jedi does not seek revenge.”

Molly was quiet for a moment. “Revenge will not bring them back, Sherlock.”

“Darth Eurus doesn’t deserve to live!” Sherlock snapped. “She has taken too many lives and she must be stopped. If not, the galaxy will never be at peace... I will never be at peace. Besides, I know she will keep searching for me as well. She won’t stop.”

“Searching for you? Why?”

Sherlock looked at her innocently quizzical expression with sorrowful eyes. “She is… my sister.”

Molly’s jaw dropped. “Sister? Are you sure?”

Sherlock nodded. “She wanted me to join her, Molly. The worst part of it is, I considered it,” he admitted sadly. “That evil, that darkness, it’s in me too. I can feel it… and I have to destroy it.”

Molly continued working on his hand as she glanced back at him. “There’s darkness in all of us, Sherlock. Killing your sister won’t take that away.”

Sherlock rolled his eyes. “I suppose you think I should have stayed with the Jedi.”

“No, I don’t,” she replied, more firmly. “If you don’t want to be a Jedi, then you shouldn’t be. But you still have to find balance in the Force. Killing your sister seems to me to be giving into that darkness.”

“Pff, when did you become an expert?”

Molly shrugged, and he saw her cheeks flushing a bit. “I’ve… done a bit of research, that’s all. You were a Jedi, after all, so I just wanted to know more about some things.”

A smirk bloomed on Sherlock’s lips. “And what exactly did you learn?”

She chewed at her lip. “Well… attachment is forbidden.”

Yes it was. And unbeknownst to her, Sherlock had many times been warned about his repeated visits to Molly’s shop. His brother Mycroft, who had chosen to be a senator despite his own Force sensitivity, had cautioned him, advising that romantic attachment could even be a path to the Dark Side.

Advice which John quite vocally disagreed with.

“Yes, that is part of the Jedi code,” Sherlock confirmed softly, watching her as she continued working.

“There,” Molly finally said a couple minutes later. “Try it out.”

Sherlock lifted his arm, turning his new hand this way and that, and bending his fingers up and down. He reached out, using the Force to pull one of the tools on Molly’s workbench toward him until he caught it in his hand.

“I think this will do nicely,” he said, hopping off the table.

“Here,” Molly added, handing him a glove. “You can wear this, so as not to draw attention to it. I’ll send word when the other one is ready.”

Sherlock tugged the glove over his mechanical fingers, then smiled at her. “Thank you, Molly.”

She nodded, smiling up at him. “It’s no problem. And, Sherlock, think about what I said, please.”

He agreed, and he meant it. He was full of anger and the desire for revenge, but was that truly the path he wanted to take? Perhaps not. Perhaps the right path involved more thought, more caution. Perhaps before confronting his sister again he must learn more about her and the strange connection they share. Could something good come from that? Could balance be found for them both? He couldn't yet say for certain.

He began to turn away, but then Sherlock stopped himself, facing her again. “Molly?”

“Hm?”

“One more thing.”

Sherlock leaned down while taking gentle hold of her chin and tilting it upward, allowing his lips to easily find hers and mold perfectly together. If ever a perfect balance was to be found in the galaxy, this was the closest he’d come to experiencing it himself. When he pulled away, gazing into her half lidded eyes, he gave her a small smile.

“I am no longer bound to the Jedi code.”

#sherlolly #sherlollyweek2023 #space au #Star Wars au #this came out ok #I’m not in love with it #but I definitely had fun plotting with Lexie and darthsydious lol

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

That was an excellent episode of WILTY that aired last night (s17e05). What a strong cast. I can’t believe they haven’t had Jessica Hynes on before, she was so much fun. I haven’t seen The Traitors so I missed a few of the references to that reality show guy, but reality show people who’ve wandered onto WILTY and are confused about what’s happening can be funny, and in this case it was definitely funny. I was disappointed that they swapped out the Sam Campbell episode that was supposed to air tonight, so pleased that we got a bit of Sam Campbell material anyway, in that Traitors’ guy’s story about being a wet guy going up from a hotel pool.

And I scored 5 out of 5 on guessing whether each story was true before the answer was revealed! It helped that I was given a free point at the end, with Lee getting an obviously fake story. And I think the This Is My answer was pretty obvious. Before that, I used reasoning that I think the panelists are not encouraged to use when deducing the answer, such as “I think they made this story up so they could have an excuse to get the comedians to make animal noises”, and “Gina Yashare has a whole career worth of wild stories about her mother and she’s never been on WILTY before, I don’t think they’d waste their first opportunity to use one of those stories by giving her a lie”.

I think the funniest part of the entire episode was Romesh Ranganathan just dying laughing at every fucking thing that happened. And that’s definitely not always funny – comedians playing up how hard they’re laughing can get annoying, on panel shows. But it helped that Romesh did not seem to be playing it up one bit. He did seem like he might possibly be a touch drunk. Whatever was going on with him, he just found the stupidity of every story the funniest thing in the world, and that was infectious. I also enjoyed Jessica Hynes struggling to tell her story because Lee Mack kept making her laugh so hard. And the way the show just broke under the stupidity and constant panelist corpsing twice – during David’s McDonald’s story and during the Traitors’ guy’s mess of a hotel story – it was great fun.

I am amazed that this show is still this good by season 17. BBC just struck gold in 2007 with the combination of a simple and open-ended format, Lee Mack's quick wit that was built for panel shows, David Mitchell's indignation that was also built for panel shows, and the excellent chemistry among the three regulars. They struck gold and were right to have run with it ever since (as opposed to other shows that are probably milking something that's been out of steam for a while, if I may mix a metaphor, on that subject I'm going to go watch the new Catsdown now).

[khrystynalaszczukpoet]

A celebrity parasocial dialogue: Russell and Jimmy

"Boys will be boys

And we like little girls"

"And you know not only did we get away with that shit

But they kept giving us more money, more exposure"

"More opportunities!

The younger the better!

Hey that runner of yours would have been tasty"

"Yeah I remember holding her little fragile little hand

Just like her Mum would have

Driving her home sitting obediently in the back seat"

"After fucking her mouth hard with your cock!"

"She choked so bad her mascara ran down

I told everyone at this gig

they all laughed

they thought it was funny as hell!”

"Haha you perverted bastard!"

"Ill take that as a compliment Jimmy!

My jokes a smokescreen?

I was the next best thing"

"You created us BBC Channel 4 politicians all running to our door

Don’t fool yourselves

You know you’re as guilty as sin!

I would openly plant my mouth on unsuspecting lips"

"Or grope them publicly like Lizzy

She loved it!"

"No Russell she was flattered

Us powerful people

Are allowed our little digressions

narcissism, psychopathy Machiavellianism

That dark glaze we get over our eyes

Man to Man

our misery spawns other abusers"

"Project your vulnerability Russell

be outraged by these accusations!

plant seeds of doubt"

"why now?

why didn’t you go to the police?"

"Yeah. Divert to all the good things you do in public

Haha …… the women groups you support

What poetic irony!

That is my advice going forward!

The media will always protect the status quo

Look at history

What’s all the fuss?……… Everyone gets groped in their childhood!"

#poem #poet #poetry #original #literature #words #writer #writing #Brand #Savile

[groundcontrol21]

Sicktember #1

Prompt #1: “Do You Know How to Take Care of a Sick Person?”

Fandom: BBC Musketeers

Title: Care and Keeping

Summary: D’Artagnan knows he’s meant to be caring for Aramis, but he doesn’t exactly know what such caring entails. Constance isn’t pleased when he pleads ignorance.

As a gift for Porthos’s upcoming birthday, it had been agreed upon by his friends to give him a new jacket, considering all that his clothes went through regularly. Constance volunteered her knowledge of fashion (and cloth merchants with the best prices), and agreed to sew the garment with Aramis’s help. Athos had volunteered his purse to fund the project, and D'Artagnan? D'Artagnan was providing moral support. 

As D'Artagnan soon found out, moral support duties extended to effectively babysitting as well. The day had started off as planned, with Athos and Porthos remaining at the garrison, training new recruits while D'Artagnan, Aramis, and Constance went out in search of fabrics. 

However, the trio hadn’t gotten far into their errands when it became apparent that Aramis was not up to the task. He sniffled, sneezed, and coughed seemingly just as often as he took a step, and looked altogether paler than he should have. When confronted by the combined forces of Constance and D'Artagnan after tripping one too many times, he admitted to a discomfort in his ear which caused a slight dizziness in his head. Both his companions knew enough to translate discomfort to pain and slight to severe, and so Constance bid D'Artagnan return with Aramis to the Bonacieux and put the ailing man to bed in the spare room while she finished the errands herself. 

So now, D'Artagnan was seated at the table in the Bonacieux home, drumming his fingers on the wood and waiting for Constance to return. Aramis had lain down with relatively little coaxing, assuring D'Artagnan that with a little sleep he would be good as new. D'Artagnan hadn’t heard much from him since, and hoped that meant the man was getting some rest. He truly didn’t look well.  

At last, Constance returned with bundles of cloth beneath her arms and a loaf of bread in her basket. Immediately, her gaze fell on the door to the spare room. 

“How is he?”

“I think he’s asleep,” D'Artagnan said. 

No sooner had he spoken, however, then did a series of hoarse, congested hacks issue, muffled, from behind the door. 

D'Artagnan winced. “Guess not.”

Constance’s brow furrowed, and she clucked her tongue. “His cough sounds pretty bad.” She drew a knife and began slicing the bread, regarding D'Artagnan henceforth from over her shoulder. 

“What kind of tea did you bring him? If the chamomile isn’t helping him, perhaps a blend of marshmallow root will.”

D'Artagnan blushed, and was suddenly glad she was not looking at him. “Well, I wasn’t sure what kind to brew and I felt bad asking him, so…” He trailed off, picking at the hem of his baldric. “I haven’t quite made him any yet?”

At this, Constance whipped around, and D'Artagnan was fairly certain that if the object in her hand had been a rolling pin instead of a knife she would have hit him with it. 

“Did you make him a compress for his ear? He said it was hurting him.”

“Er—“

The knife clattered to the counter as Constance threw up her hands. “D'Artagnan! Have you done anything to help the poor man?”

“Um—“

“Do you know how to take care of a sick person?”

“Not really, no!” D'Artagnan cried in exasperation, feeling his face grow hot. Aramis hadn’t asked for anything, and D'Artagnan was wondering when that became his fault. “That’s why I was waiting for you to come back.”

Constance rolled her eyes. “You’re unbelievable!”

Affronted, D'Artagnan seized the opportunity to tell Constance a few things he couldn’t believe about her, and so they went, bickering and casting insults about upbringings and lifestyles as was necessary. Their heated words might have escalated to a full-blown fight, had it not been for a hoarse call from the other room. 

“As much as I enjoy feeling like a child listening in on his parents’ row, I’d be much obliged if you’d let me sleep.” The words were followed immediately by a pair of wrenching sneezes that had Constance frowning. “Heh’SHOO! Heh’ISH!”

“Of course, Aramis,” Constance said, voice and posture softening exponentially, “we apologize.”

As D'Artagnan sank back into his chair, the tension bleeding from him as quickly as it had come, she tucked hair behind her ear, chewing on her lip as though she wanted to say something else but was unsure of what to say. The decision was made for her when Aramis underwent a small fit of coughing. 

“Would you like some tea before you sleep?” she called through the door, leaning her head against the wood as she awaited an answer. 

“That would be—Heh’kssshh!—lovely.”

“I’ll make it,” D'Artagnan said quickly, jumping to his feet. 

Constance narrowed her eyes at him. “Damn right you will.” 

#poor ara/mis #do not reblog to non kink blogs #snzfic #sickfic #my writing #sicktember 2022 #sicktember day 1 #the world needs so much more historic snz fic #more muskie snz!!! #sick ara/mis

[legends-of-time]

Amelia’s Story (BBC Merlin Story)

Chapter 3: Becoming Too Real

Masterlist

Just one week after Amelia had met Ygraine and Uther, disaster happens. She's laying on her blanket outside while Helen relaxes in a chair when a messenger on a horse arrives at the house. At first, she does not realise anything is wrong until she hears shocked gasps coming from Helen.

"George! George!" Cries Helen. "You will never believe what happened!"

"What is it, Helen?" George says confusedly as he steps out of their home as he hears his wife's cries.

"It is the Queen! She went into labour too early and has passed!" Helen sobs. This makes Amelia confused as she swears Ygraine had another month at least.

George clearly shares a her confusion, "but she was not due for another month! She said so herself!"

"It was shock that caused her to go into giving birth prematurely," Helen explains. "She had just gotten a letter that her sister had died."

"Vivienne? But she was so well." George comments still sounding very confused.

"They found her in the woods. She had a servant to hand her sister a letter she had written and then ran off." Helen exclaims. What happened in the woods?

"Poor Morgana and Gorlois!" George cries. "Uther as well. Did the baby survive?"

"Yes, a healthy baby boy. An heir."

This whole situation is overwhelming. George and Helen obviously believe that as Amelia is only a month old baby and she won't understand what they are talking about. The show never really explained what happened to Morgana and Morgause's mother. It does sound very dodgy though. Vivienne simply rode into the woods after telling someone to send a letter to her sister before being found dead. What happened in the woods and what was in that letter that caused Ygraine's early labour?

Amelia knows that the Great Purge is going to begin now. Uther likely used magic to impregnate his wife as he did in the show and now he is going to punish thousands of innocent people for something they cannot control to lessen his guilt. It is also going to make a lot of people angry and vengeful and this causes her mind to drift towards Morgause. She is likely with the High Priestesses at the Isle of the Blessed by now. Though Amelia knows she does not need to worry about Morgause for a while.

——

Amelia does not meet Morgana or Arthur, however, until she is 3 years old. It is another trip to the Castle. She has not returned since Ygraine's death and Arthur's birth but George has and sometimes Helen too. This means that Amelia has not had the opportunity to meet Arthur or Morgana. To be honest she is getting tired of waiting.

When they arrive in the Council Chambers, the Court seems more sombre than Amelia remembers and that partly might be due to the fact that Uther is not as joyful himself as he was when she first met him. She straightens herself uncomfortably and tries not to start tugging at her long brown hair that's been half pinned up.

They are announced once again by the herald, which still makes Amelia jump, and then all three of them begin walking towards where Uther sits at the other end of the Hall.

"Helen, George, it is good to see you," Uther utters. "You do not come often enough." He gives them a small smile.

"We apologise, Sire," George answers respectfully. "I hope you remember our daughter Amelia?" At the sound of her name, Amelia steps from Helen's side and curtsies like Helen and her Nanny had taught her. Uther simply looks at her with a sad glance.

"My my you've grown haven't you?" This unnerves Amelia slightly and she does not respond until she feels Helen nudge her side with a leg.

"Thank you, Your Majesty," Amelia says quietly.

Uther then beckons a woman that Amelia had noticed over to them and when she did a small mop of blonde hair pops from behind her and a pair of blue eyes like hers watching Amelia. After analysing him for a minute, Amelia realises that this must be Arthur.

"This is my son Arthur," Uther states proudly. "I am sure the two of you are going to be the best of friends." This causes Arthur to turn his stare toward her and shyly give her a smile while Amelia returns it.

"Nanny why don't you take the two of them to the Nursery," Uther orders. "I am sure that Gorlois's daughter is already there with her own Nanny."

"Yes, Sire," the Nanny murmurs before taking Arthur's hand as well as Amelia's. She looks toward Helen, who gives her an encouraging smile.

The Nanny then begins to lead Arthur and Amelia down the hall away from the Council Chambers. They walk down many halls not speaking a word to each other until they arrive at another door. Arthur's Nanny knocks and the door opens to reveal another woman.

"Your Highness," the woman utters curtsying. "Nanny Grey, My Lady." She opens the door.

The three of them step into a room of considerable size even though this is a room for one child. Royals. The room must be inside one of the Castle's turrets as it is of a round nature. There is the obvious cot in the corner with expensive white silks hanging over it and opposite the cot, on the other side of the room is a large window with the same type of silk as the cot framing it. There is also a door on one side that Amelia doesn't know where it leads.

After analysing this, she then notices a young girl with dark hair that might as well of been cut from the same cloth as the silk on the cot and curtains and skin that makes it obvious that she dinot see the sun often in the middle of the room playing. Morgana.

"My Lady? Arthur is back and he's brought a new friend for all of you to play with." The woman, who opened the door, speaks in a clear calm voice. This causes Morgana to glance up and run up to them with a doll in her hands.

She looked at Amelia and bluntly asks, "Who are you?"

"Lady Morgana!" Her Nanny immediately scolds. Amelia does not really mind and instead, she grabs Arthur's and Morgana's hands and pulls them towards the toys.

"I am Amelia by the way. We can be friends." Amelia says hoping that this will work because she genuinely does want to be friends with Morgana and get to know her.

"Alright then." She sniffs trying to act like she does not care when she does actually look interested. "Let us all play."

As they begin to play Arthur then pipes up, "Can I be friends with you too?"

"Of course," Amelia says warmly thinking how adorable Arthur looks at this age, it makes her want to squash his cheeks.

——

Just as Amelia hopes, they all grow up close from that point on, of course, she and Morgana are not always in Camelot as Gorlois is still alive and Amelia has her own home with George and Helen. However, they visit often especially on special events, birthdays for example. Wanting to be good friends with the two of them on one hand stems from her obsession with the show and wanting to get to know the characters and on the other hand, it comes from her want to full fill Ygraine's wish that they would be close.

Of course, it is not always fun and games. During this time since Arthur's birth, Uther has been executing anyone with some type of magic. Due to the fact that Amelia is to everyone a very small child, she is mostly kept away from the brutality of the Great Purge. Though whenever he can, Uther will bring up his view, what he sees as the correct view, that magic is evil.

When she and Arthur are old enough to have lessons, Helen, George and Amelia move to the Castle, as Morgana had a year earlier, so that she can join Morgana with her Governess while Arthur is having his own separate lessons to prepare him for being King. The only lesson they all share is being taught to sword fight, which Helen is not happy with as she does not see this as very ladylike but George and Gorlois feel that it is important for Amelia and Morgana to learn some type of self-defence.

Science is an interesting one due to the fact that it is not developed as it is in the 21st century, not that Amelia remembers all that she was taught but she remembers the odd thing, which completely contradicts what she is being taught in Camelot.

One obvious topic that all three of them are taught is the evilness of magic, which annoys Amelia cause this is Uther's attempt to brainwash all of them. She often openly disagrees with her Governess over this and of course, this is reported back to Uther. He often lectures her on how she is only young and does not truly understand the world. Amelia still argues back and from seeing her do this, Morgana often backs her up, which Amelia is grateful for as she is still only small and Uther is very imposing.

However, one day when Amelia is six, Uther has enough and decides to show what happens to people who practise magic and those that help them. Her first execution. Amelia has never seen anyone die in her life ever, especially witnessing someone lose their head. People like Gaius, who she has gotten to know well whenever she needs medical help, George and Helen try to persuade Uther from doing this but he argues that she needs to be taught what happens to those who are 'evil' sorcerers. He seems the type of parent to give tough treatment, to show children the harsh reality.

It is not a day that you would forget. Amelia remembers being led to the Balcony by a servant that she does not recognise, she is kept near the back though while Uther stands at the front for all to see. Then the drumbeat begins, Amelia sees two Guards begin to lead the young woman towards the execution block that is in the middle of the Square, surrounded by a large enough crowd. Uther begins his speech about the 'justice' that is going to happen and the 'evilness' of this person as Guards lead the woman up the steps of the stand the block sits on. Amelia admires this woman for her strength as while looking like she is about to cry, she is able to control her emotions and be calm despite the fact that she is going to die.

As the woman begins to kneel down and place her head on the block, Amelia begins to feel her blood gushing in her ears, she feels like her heart is beating so loud that everyone can hear it and she half expects Uther to turn around and scold her but he does not. Amelia watches the executioner lift up the axe and begin to lower it when Uther gives him the signal.

(A/N: this next chapter is a bit descriptive so if you don't like that skip this next paragraph)

The axe seems to be moving in slow motion and even though Amelia knows that she should turn her eyes away from the scene so she will not see the woman lose her head, she cannot turn her eyes away from it. It gets nearer and nearer until there is a thump. The woman's head falls to the floor, blood pouring from where the head used to be making Amelia feel sick, but the worst bit is seeing how her body carries on twitching for a few moments before going still.

Her heart is beating so loud that Amelia does not hear the gasps of the crowd nor Uther calling her name, she can only see the woman's body and the Guards putting her head into a basket.

"Amelia, Amelia," Uther cries, but in concern, before grabbing her small shoulders so that Amelia would look at him tearing her gaze from the horrific sight in front of her. "Do you understand Amelia? Do you understand that I do this to protect you from the evil magic causes?"

Amelia only stares at him before fleeing from the Balcony towards Gaius's Chambers where she hopes to find him leaving Uther yelling her name.

——

A/N: Please leave comments on how you're enjoying this story and what you think.

#bbc merlin #merlin

[xviruserrorx]

-> Day 5 - "What character do you wish to see whumped more in canon/fan-made media?"

Oh, always a good question. I feel like the two are very separate in a way so I'm gonna give my opinion on both! @whumpmasinjuly-archive

Canon

As far as cannon goes I think every source of media always falls short on the recovery and comfort of the spectrum when it comes to Whump, or even stressing that something happened and that it's still affecting them. Shows like BBC Merlin, Stranger Things, Supernatural, all have characters with bad trauma and they have opportunities to touch on it but sadly never do.

In Supernatural I always wanted to see them elaborate more on the whole angel family because there's so much there especially with Chuck and Michael and what Naomi did as well as Gadreel and how they handle punishment it's just so much there!

Another on I can think of is Atlantis and granted if they had gotten their S3, I honestly believed they would have pulled through but that ending with Pythagoras and Icarus! The betrayal, their relationship, that line from Pythagoras "he's not mine to love" line is just so ah! The angst, the feels, the emotions, it was all there and I wish everyday we had got that S3!

And lastly, Merlin, because they have so much opportunities that they never took, here's just some for example...

Arthur: Child Neglect and the affects of that, Death, Grief, A lot of non-con things happen to him, he sustains a lot of injuries over the series and it would be interesting to see the lasting symptoms of those, his trust in others/inability to trust others would be cool to see (I say this because of later seasons with Gwen, Lancelot, Mordred, Morgana, even Merlin.)

Elyan: The relationship with his father! More things about their mother (what happened to her? Did she die in childbirth?) What happened to him before we meet him, his relationship with Gwen and Arthur when she gets exiled, and the relationships of the knight in whole after they loose elyan too!

Mordred: First the question of what happened to his parents and why Cerdan is his guardian, his relationship with Kara, what happened to him the whole time that he disappears after we last see him in S2? But also that time period of when he ends up in Alvar's care, and even how did he end up being a slave trader? His words to Morgana "I've had to learn how to survive", what was this small child forced to do to live during that whole time period?

I could go on all day but so many shows have soooo many good opportunities and they never elaborate on them!

Fan-made

I honestly don't have any opinions on fanfiction, fanart etc mainly because if I wish to see them whumped then I will do so myself XD. Rare pairs always need more love as well as background/minor characters and that includes whumpping them. But... I will say the hurt/comfort tag in Succession makes me very sad because there is no comfort 😂, but it makes sense considering the source material.

For me personally I love doing a good "what if" scenario. A, what if this happens instead of this, sorta thing which usually changes the story line and then you can sneak all types of fun stuff in their.

~~~VirusError🌸

Wij 2022 Masterlist | Wij 2023 Masterlist [Prev <- • -> Next]

#whumpmasinjuly2023 #wij23day5 #yes im behind im playing catchup once again! #also before anyones says this isn't whump #i see whump as a large umbrella with angst and hurt/comfort being branches under that umbrella 👍 #i usually group all 'sad/horror' sorta stuff into one group to keep my brain space organized

[english8muffin]

Vogue morning routine

Y/N Y/N/L’s guide to effortless natural makeup

Summary: you are asked to do the Vogue Beauty Secrets video and your two boys decide to join the party

Word count: around 2000

Warning: none, just pure floof!

I apologize in advance if there are any spelling and/or grammar mistakes, English is not my first language (+ this is my very first fic)

HEADLINE Henry Cavill’s new girlfriend, designer Y/N Y/L/N reveals her everyday morning routine in recent Vogue video: Y/N Y/L/N shows off her secrets to the perfect fusion of European and Asian beauty.

You stood in the spacious bathroom of the hotel room, only wearing a big, fluffy, white robe, that was actually Henry’s. But since the man was in the gym, you took the opportunity to lend it and bathe yourself in his musky smell, that calmed your nerves. Last night you started panicking, thinking you would probably look stupid for the entire world to see, luckily Henry and Kal tried to calm you down with cuddles and kisses.

This was the first ‘interview’ you would do, being such a young, successful entrepreneur really caught the attention of the media. When you first started your small online shop, you never would have thought you would end up here. Five years later, with a steady income, the job you always wished for and the man you had a crush on since the first time you laid eyes on him. Being a creative, it really made your heart soar with happiness, seeing all your products, your babies, in new homes where they would make others happy.

You were really proud of yourself. Henry was as well, and he made sure you and everybody around you knew. You were apprehensive at first, being with such a well known actor, who was also much older than you, it made you nervous of what people would say, what the media would say. You didn’t want to tarnish Henry’s image. You knew there were people with a much bigger age gap, but still, people were ruthless. So you both decided to take it slow, being careful with going out in public and social media posts.

You stand in front of the large mirror, which had a camera attached to it and open up your makeup bag. Right before you went into the bathroom, you made yourself a nice cup of tea, trying to stay calm. “Hi! I’m Y/N and today I am going to show you my everyday makeup routine,” you say with a smile, “I am not a dermatologist so please don’t take what I say too seriously.”

You grab a small white washcloth and hold it up, so it was in the frame, “First, I am going to wash my face and put on a few drops of serum,” You dampen the cloth and wipe it over your face and neck. You put a few drops in the palm of your hand and pat them into your skin. “Now I going to use my jade roller to massage the serum into my skin. It’s quite funny seeing so many people use these nowadays. In ancient China they were mostly used by the elite to keep there skin ageless. They would call jade the Stone of Heaven. It’s really helpful for the people who wake up with a puffy face like me,” you chuckle.

Somethimes you’d wake up with puffy cheeks, which led to Henry calling you his chubby bunny in the morning.

“Just a quick tip, and this is for everybody, make sure you always use SPF. I personally use SPF 30 and this one is shine control, since I tend to get an oily skin, but you can also use a regular one or a foundation with SPF in it. Believe me when I say your skin will be thankful.”

You grab the small tube of sun cream and show the amount you’ll use. You even convinced Henry to wear SPF everyday. At first he said he didn’t think it would make such a big difference, but when he realised you were going to be the one to put it on him, he was convinced about its benefits and adamant to wear it everyday. After working the thick cream into your skin, you put on some lipbalm and rummage through the pouch in front of you. When you find the product you’re looking for, you hold it up. “Now, I am going to put on a bit of concealer, this one is from Maybelline. After this, I will use a lighter shade under my eyes and on my acne scars that I have here,” you point and circle around the small cluster of scars on the sides of your cheeks.

Before blending out the concealer, you smile at the lens and put in two bright yellow hairclips, to keep your dark locks from falling into your face. “I probably should have done this at the start,” you laugh. The nerves creeping up a little. It wasn’t that you where a shy person, but knowing thousands of people will watch this, did something to you. You were always a very easygoing person, who could talk with pretty much everybody. But knowing people were going to watch you do something so intimate in a way, and would probably comment on it, scared you a little. While you would be 100% yourself, doing something as mundane as getting ready. If they didn’t like you now, then they probably won’t like you later. And that was what made you so afraid.

The bathrobe falls a bit down your shoulder, but you ignore it, since your hair fell down your shoulders in big waves. “Okay, brows. I used to block them in really dark when I was younger, but now I try to keep a light hand. I’ll use this Got 2B Glued as a brow gel afterwards. The tails of my eyebrows tend to move if I don’t use a strong enough gel. If you’re Asian you will understand the struggle.”

You quickly finish your brows, put some bronzer on your face and eyelids and take out your liquid eyeliner. “Am I the only one that acts like I’m a beauty guru whenever I do my makeup? Like, I’m just acting as if I’m used to this, right now, but to be honest, I was really nervous to do this video for Vogue,” you admit, “they will probably regret asking me,” you chuckle. You finish your eyemakeup with curling your long lashes, thanks to your mother’s genes, and add a coat of mascara.

You take in a deep breath, excited to show everyone the product you had been waiting for. “The next thing I am really proud to show you guys, because I designed the packaging. This is the new limited edition blush and highlighter palette from Dior, which they created for Lunar New Year!” You beam with pride, holding up the elegant looking palette. It had a darker toned glossy finish and the borders were the traditional Chinese looking frames, which were 3D and were surrounded by a wild variety of peonies. In the middle of the lid was your Chinese calligraphy in big golden brush stokes that said ‘year of the Ox’, the clasp was designed so it resembled an antique Chinese coin and on the side hung a jade charm.

“You can pre-order this palette now, I think they will put a link-thingy in de description. I wish you all a happy and blessed Lunar New Year, 祝农历年新年快乐牛年大吉!”

Just as you’re about to add some blush to your cheeks, the bathroom door creaks open and a curly-headed, sweaty Henry pops his head in. Fresh from the gym, and were you thankful for his new intense workout, because he was truely a sight to behold. A cheeky smile graces his handsome face when he spots you in front of the mirror, only wearing his robe, which made his grin widen.

“what are you doing in here? Are you hiding from me? Playing hide and seek is it?” he teases and rakes his large hand through the tousled curls, but just as he’s done speaking, he sees the camera behind you, and blushes. “Oh, I didn’t know you were filming, I’m sorry darling,” he smiles and gives a small wave in the direction of the camera. You led out a giggle, cheeks turning red already, if he’d keep this up, you wouldn’t need to add blush. You couldn’t focus anymore, he looked so attractive, only wearing his black gym shorts and a tight dark blue tank top. Damn that camera, otherwise you would have jumped him. Henry, thought the exact same thing. Seeing you, only wearing his robe and your hair still a bit wild from this morning’s cardio, made him hold back a moan. Those two cute, yellow clips in your hair could have fooled him, because you were anything but innocent.

Before he’s about to close the door again, he blows you a kiss. But his actions are stopped when a big bear makes his appearance. Bolting past his dad’s legs, Kal comes into the bathroom. Henry tries to catch him but misses. The black and white akita excitedly sniffs his head around the sink, trying to see what you were up to with all the stuff lying on the marble counter.

“Kal!” Henry whisper-yelled, trying to stay hidden behind the door. But you could still see his massive body crouched down behind the wood. It was rather funny, seeing the large man so panicked about getting his dog to listen. It kind of reminded you of that one video from BBC were a professor was being interviewed and his baby and nanny showed up in the background. While Henry tried to get Kal’s attention, the dog just sat next to your legs, and smiled when you pet him behind his ear. He was your good boy.

You both knew there was no other option but to keep Kal here, once he saw you do your makeup, he wanted to watch and get his ‘makeup’ done as well.

Henry also saw the look in Kal’s eyes and let out a sigh. Might as well stay with his two loves. He stood up from his position and walked to you, wrapping his sweaty but oh so save body around your figure, and placed a prolonged kiss on the exposed skin just by your shoulder. So far for taking it slow… He pressed himself thighter against your back, hiding his face in the crook of your neck and intertwined your hands, slowly rocking you two back en forth. “You look beautiful, my love,” he whispered, so only you could hear it, at least you hoped the camera wouldn’t pick that up. You let out a little giggle, like the inner schoolgirl you were whenever he was around you.

“Kal loves when Y/N does his makeup as well, don’t you boy,” Henry explains with a smile and looks down at the bear by your bare feet. Kal gives a small ruff and sweeps his tail eagerly. “Did you show them what you made,” he asked you with a wide smile, and looked straight in to the camera, “she worked really hard on that design, so I hope you all like it,” he declared proudly.

You ended up doing your makeup routine with your two boys in the background. Henry left for a few minutes to shower in the second bathroom your hotelroom had, and came back clad in a pair of light jogging trousers and a sweater. Even though you were inside, it was still a bit too chilly to walk around in short sleeves, being mid-winter and all. He just sat on the small wooden bench by the door, still in frame for everybody to enjoy and behold. His hair now damp. He was reading in a book and patiently waiting for you to get ready, occasionally looking up and laughing when you would wet your hands or Kal’s special makeup brush in the sink and pretend to do his makeup. The dog would bark excitedly and give you kisses. “Wow Kal, you look so pretty,” Henry told the big floof with the chuckle.

“Okay, this was my -somewhat- everyday makeup routine! Thank you guys for watching this chaotic mess, hope you laughed a bit, bye-bye, 再见!” How do those vlogger end their videos? Smash like and subscribe?

Behind you Henry looked up from the pages of his fantasy book and arched his brow, “Hey! No shout-out for your special guests? See you all next time!”

WOOHOO!! This is my very first fanfic, I really hope you enjoyed it. Liking, reposting and commenting would mean a lot to me! If you do repost this, please do not edit or copy my work. I worked really hard on this.

Much love, Nahmi xxx

Masterlist can be found HERE!

Want to be notified whenever I post something?

HERE IS MY TAG LIST!

#henry cavill fic #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill x you #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill one shot #kal cavill #kalentine day #famous!reader #famous! y/n #asian reader #mixed reader #wasian reader #agegap #henry cavill drabble #one shot #fluff #henry cavill fluff #boyfriend henry #my writing #my work #non native english speaker #non-english reader #english8muffin fics #henry cavil x asian!reader #older! henry cavill #younger!y/n #henry cavill writing

[syms-things-5]

Case Histories - Chapter Eight

An AU Andy Barber fic (based on BBC’s ‘The Split’)

Previous Chapter Here / Masterlist Here

Series Synopsis: A talented small-town family lawyer, Grace Atherton, gets the opportunity of a lifetime when she is offered a job at prestigious Boston law firm, Rothman and Hale. She decides to give up the relative comfort and ease of her current working situation in favour of following a dream she’s had since she was a young law grad, to the detriment of her family life and marriage. She soon comes into contact with old mentor and one-time flame, Andy Barber. As gifted as he is handsome, it becomes clear he’s been keeping an eye on her burgeoning career from afar. Just how much will this decision cost her?

Chapter Warnings: 18+ language, angst, emotional stress

CHAPTER EIGHT

Andy looked to be in his element. 

The three men, all smartly-dressed and wearing confidence as easy as if it was a watch, were currently stood in a circle, laughing at something hilarious he had just said. Judging by some of the hand signals, it was football related. No surprise, really. She had been made aware curtesy of Sam this morning that the Patriots were officially heading to the Super Bowl for the third year in a row. Both he and Dan had even started making plans for the food fest they were going to enjoy whilst watching it. 

Another loud laugh bellowed from one of the men, an older gentleman who evidently liked his suits to come equipped with pocket watches clashing patterns, and Andy looked to make his excuses to let the group move on. They briefly disappear into an office behind where they were stood before Andy reappears and starts striding with purpose towards her office. 

She quickly ducks behind a bookshelf just in time to see him materialise in the doorway. He looks around for a second to locate her before seeing her awkwardly crouched down beside her desk. 

“You OK down there?” He looks at her with faint amusement. 

“Yeh, course. Just looking for…this.” She grabs any white file and stands up, flashing it to him as though that would act as proof she was being genuine. 

“Tax law?” He asks, quickly spying the title before she puts the file face-down on her desk. 

“Yeh. For the Matherson thing.” She straightens up and tucks the loose hair behind her ear. “So, what’s up?” 

He narrows his eyes before thinking better of mocking her. 

“There’s a couple of guys I thought you would like to meet. They’re from Yale. Max Ellison is running a mentor scheme next semester and has asked me to recommend a couple of the best, annnnd…” 

He holds his hands out in front of him to indicate that he was most obviously talking about her. Which he didn’t think he would have to do but she looked much like a rabbit caught in the headlights almost as soon as he had entered her office. 

“Me?” She points to herself. 

“No, Cindy Crawford. Of course, you!” 

“But why? Max is a bit of legend, isn’t he? You should be choosing the very best to make yourself look good.” 

He opens his mouth to speak. He’s not sure if she’s being serious right now or if this is one of those moments where she has a crisis of conscience and he should offer some soothing words of wisdom. Like he even had any. He never did understand women. 

“Exactly. I’m obviously suggesting you because even though you’re still new here, you’ve been making a name for yourself and I think that type of story will resonate more with the students.” He says, his voice now lower and as he moves towards her. “And I kind of figured I made it clear the other night that you are the best.” 

The heat radiating from him as he stands just inches from her momentarily clouds her brain, so much so that she swallows thickly and tries to regain her composure. It was really not OK that they were both tempting fate like this. 

The morning after. 

He watches her silently as she moves around the room. She is being extra careful to gather her things together without trying to wake him, he figures. She doesn’t know he’s awake yet or that he has been awake for the past twenty or so minutes after he heard her start the shower. He doesn’t make any move to let her know he’s awake either; he honestly doesn’t know when or even if he’ll get to do this again. Just watching her with ease, making him feel peaceful. 

She tucks her laptop back into its case and zips the side shut. She ponders something for a second, placing a hand on her hip while she glances back towards the television cabinet, and he sees her reach for her phone charger.

She unlocks the phone screen and he can tell there’s messages waiting for her. Likely Dan, he suspects, and he can’t help but feel his heart sink a little at the intrusive thought. Back to reality. 

“Hey,” he speaks with a slightly groggier tone than is entirely accurate of how he is feeling. 

She turns to look at him, lying on his front, both arms hugging the pillow beneath his head. He looks as adorable as he did back then, the years in-between making no difference to his boyish handsomeness. 

“Hi.” She says quietly. “I didn’t want to wake you.” 

“S’Ok. I was just dozing.” He manoeuvres his body slightly so he can lie on his side. “You getting ready to go?” 

“Um, yeh.” She looks a little bashful. “But I wasn’t gonna go without saying goodbye or anything.” 

“I wouldn’t blame you. Not like I haven’t done it before.” 

There was a lot of unanswered questions hanging between them and a lot they would likely have to talk about. When exactly, she couldn’t say, and she was hoping he wouldn’t ask just yet. 

At some point in the middle of the night, they had laid in bed facing one another, both wrapped up in the sheets. He was running his hand gently up and down her arm, her skin so smooth under his fingertips. No tension, no goosebumps, just comfort and warmth and a sense of calm that they were both locked away from the outside world, if only for a few hours, before daylight arrived and brought them both crashing back down to Earth. But not before he coaxed another orgasm from her tired body. 

He moved to lie on top of her, threading his arm underneath her head and kissing her passionately as though it might be the last time he would get to do so. It was soft and warm and all the ways she liked being kissed. There was the all-too-familiar strength that had never failed to keep her safe and secure when she held on to him as he moved inside her. He pushed her to the edge time and time again, not quite letting her go until he decided he wanted to. He kept a firm grasp on her as he held her down and took her breath away, pulling at her hair wrapped loosely between his fingers before finally cumming with a slow, satisfied gasp. 

She remembered a lot about how he used to make her feel back then. It was like they were the only two people for miles around. They could stay like that, in their self-made cocoon, for as long as she wanted. He was never impatient with her, even when she was certain he had other, better, things to do with his time. He had never made her feel like she wasn’t wanted or that she was getting in his way, which she occasionally thought she might have been such was her lack of self-esteem back then. 

She figured other girls were made to feel the same way. No one ever had a bad word to say about him, even back then when he had more of a cockiness about him, a certain swagger that you could enjoy but from a safe distance. She wasn’t naïve. 

His body looked and felt much the same way, too. Hard and soft in all the right places, still keenly working out and taking good care of himself but not obsessively so. She once told him that the luck of the Irish had given him an impressive physique without much effort but he would coolly shrug it off. One thing that was new was the tattoo on his chest, a quote she couldn’t quite make out in the dark but she saw the outline of it closely enough when she ran her fingers across it as she looked down at him and felt him shiver under her touch.

It was all so familiar, more familiar than she had ever thought it would be. She didn’t know she had held on to so many of the memories until now, as she looked across at him and ran her fingers soothingly down his cheek. He smiled softly at her, tiredness gradually appearing in his eyes. 

He didn’t want to fall asleep, not yet. He wanted to stay awake so she might come to him and let him take her all over again. 

Present Day… 

He feels a little bad. He’s obviously taken it a step too far. He tilts his head and smiles at her before taking a step back and beckons towards the door. 

“…You wanna?” 

She thinks for a second. She does wanna, but she’s not prepared. Not even close for someone like Max Ellison. 

“Don’t worry.” He reassures her when he spies the panic creeping onto her face. “I’ve buttered them up with the prospect of Superbowl tickets so you could tell them you think Morrison’s report is a vital addition to Wilson Huhn’s framework and they would love you regardless.” 

“They’d have to be drunk to believe that, surely?” 

He chuckles as he follows her out of her office. She was right; Morrison was an idiot and no lawyer worth their salt would use his ideas in an argument. 

As it turned out, she didn’t need to be there at all. Andy had them both eating out of the palm of his hand with tales of Jack’s past shenanigans (it turned out Ellison had gone to college with him back in Ohio) and some inside joke about a man named Doug and his pet chihuahua who regularly accompanied him to Court. Apparently, he would bark at the guilty parties but stay silent if he thought they were innocent. Grace had vaguely heard of such a person but she had always assumed it was a myth or a joke that had gotten out of hand in certain circles. 

She headed back to her office afterwards. Andy appeared moments later after he had shown the gentlemen out. 

“So?” He posed, taking a seat in the chair opposite her. He looked far too confident. 

No matter how cool or slick Andy pretended he was these days, he couldn’t completely hide the childlike glee of being able to do something so utterly ridiculous for a living. And being a Lawyer, deciding the fates of complete strangers, was that ridiculous. 

“I don’t know….” 

He frowned at her before leaning forward in his chair so he could place his elbows on her desk. That was a move usually reserved for convincing people they were being unrealistic in their expectations of a settlement, or that they were not going to get the very thing they so desperately wanted. She didn’t much care for it in this scenario, though; she likely knew she wasn’t going to win. 

“At least let us put forward a session plan. This could be a good move for you, for the company, and Jack is behind it 100%. Plus…” He trailed off as he contemplated his next words. “It might give us the opportunity to spend a bit of time together, work together again like the old days.” 

He tries to hide the potential disappointment lingering beneath his carefully poised façade, ready to surface if her response wasn’t what he wanted to hear.

They hadn’t ended things in a bad way when they left the hotel. In fact, if anything, it left him with a sense of hope. Not hope that this was going to become something per se, but it was enough for him that Grace had at least acknowledged his sentiment that it had been an amazing night. She shouldn’t be so surprised that he wanted to maintain some form of personal company with her in light of everything they had shared. 

“Look, I’m not going to make any demands of you if that’s what you’re worried about. If this was a mistake then I’d rather you just said so.” He said. “You don’t need to protect my feelings. I’m a big boy, I can handle it.” 

Was that what she was doing? Protecting his feelings? Or was she protecting her own? 

She hadn’t particularly had much time to consider the implications of what had gone on between them. In the morning after, Andy had walked her to her car parked in the underground garage and kissed her softly on her cheek before they parted ways. As soon as she left the hotel, almost within the very same hour, she was back home and in the arms of her familial comforts. Andy had only asked if she could message him that weekend, just to let him know she was OK, and she had done that very thing. But…that had been all. By the time Monday had arrived and he had smiled warmly at her across the table in the boardroom during one of Jack’s impromptu catch-ups, she felt like she had let him down in some way. He didn’t deserve it when it was her own issues that had put them in this position. 

He had been honest; he wasn’t going to make any demands of her. He had never done such a thing before and he certainly wasn’t going to start now. He trusted her enough to allow her to figure it out in her own mind and when she did, he trusted she would tell him what was going on. For now, he just wanted to be around her in any way he could. Even if that was restricted to just these four walls of the office. 

“I am sorry, Andy. I don’t really know what I’m thinking to be honest.” She says, quietly. 

“And that’s OK. I don’t want to put pressure on you, I just didn’t want to leave you with any doubt over what I was thinking.” He attempts to comfort her. “And I think about you a lot.” 

He would have reached out to touch her if they had a bit more privacy but he’s acutely aware she wouldn’t be able rest if he did so, not with people milling around outside and the annoyance of having so many damn glass walls placed around the building. He shouldn’t complain about them, he had a fair few himself at home, but they had never gotten in his way before. 

“Could I maybe think about it for a day or two?” she finally asks. 

“Of course!” 

She wasn’t expecting him to agree to that, much less with such enthusiasm. Then again, she was also not expecting to decide within the hour that she was definitely going to do this with him. It would be a great opportunity and another string to her bow, plus a good way of getting familiar with some of Yale’s professors in case her children had those kinds of ambitions later in life. There was a lot of reasons to say ‘yes’. 

Later that evening, Grace is multi-tasking, chopping vegetables and keeping one eye on the Television while Sam lies on the sofa. He’s comfortable and likely won’t move for some time now, not unless food is being offered, and she thinks that’s adorable. He’s definitely her son. 

She never understood the need for a separate living space since the family spent most of their time in the kitchen and dining area. Dan had joked about bomb-proofing it since it pretty much held everything they could ever need if the worst was to happen. 

“Do you want the spiral pasta or the bow-tie one?” Grace asks. 

“Bow-tie.” Sam answered, not moving an inch as far as she could tell. 

Always straight and to the point. She smiles to herself and continues to chop the vegetables for a salad she knows the kids likely won’t eat but nevertheless, she keeps the hope alive. 

The front door goes moments later. Dan walks over to the sofa and kisses Sam on the head before thinking about doing the same to Grace. She can tell he thinks better of it. Instead, he moves to the fridge behind her and grabs a beer.

“Smells nice.” 

“Just the asparagus and chicken that was left over. Nothing fancy.” Grace says. “Was Liv OK?” 

“Yeh, yeh. She’s just getting changed. She scored a couple this time so she’s in a good mood.” Dan says as he leans his forearms on the side of the kitchen island. “Do you need a hand?” 

“No, it’s OK, you can go and relax.” 

She smiles at him and he nods to her, gratefully. She was tired as well but she definitely had some making-up to do, even if he didn’t know it. 

Andy 06.45pm: What’s your stance on dick pics?? 

Her phone buzzes just as she places the pasta in the pan to cook. Wiping her hands on the tea towel nearby, she reaches for it and doesn’t recognise the reaction she’s now feeling. 

Grace 06.48pm: Ummm…I can’t say I’ve ever received one myself. Why? 

Andy 06.49pm: CEO of Veterol has been sending them to his Secretary. Not yet public knowledge so keep that to yourself. 

Grace 06.51pm: Shit 

Grace 06.52pm: I can’t believe that asshole….. 

She googles for a photo of said asshole to make sure it was definitely the same man she was picturing. It was. He looked the type as well. Not that there was a ‘type’ specifically, but he looked smarmy and arrogant enough to think he could get away with it. 

Andy 07.01pm: So youve never had one? 

Was he being serious? 

Grace 07.03pm: That would be a big no thankfully 

Andy 07.04pm: You’re missing out 

Another few seconds and an emoji comes through, the one with a winking face and a tongue sticking out. Oh God, he was a nuisance sometimes. She really didn’t want to spend any longer thinking about the implications of what he was trying to joke about or get into his own personal experiences as the water continued to boil. 

Grace 07.10pm: Goodnight Andrew Barber. 

Emphasis on the full stop at the end. 

Andy 07.14pm: I do love it when you use my full name 

She doesn’t reply again. 

Sometimes, she felt like an old lady (or so Liv would tell her) as she hated the concept of texting and hated even more that things could be so easily misconstrued. And she really didn’t want to get this misconstrued, not when she didn’t know what she was thinking or doing from one moment to the next.

“Can you grab me another one?” 

She looks up from Andy’s message to where the question had come from. Without looking back to where she was stood, Dan holds the empty beer bottle up in his hand. He’s focused on the cartoon that he and Sam had been watching, and he doesn’t say another thing. 

“Dinner’s ready so you can grab it on the way to the table.” She turns around to grab the salad tongs. She can hear Dan’s eye roll from here. “Sam? Can you get your sister?” 

He doesn’t move at first, just waiting for the credits to finish in case there’s something on afterwards, so she asks him once more, sterner this time, and he finally moves. 

“You OK?” Dan asks, putting a couple of the pasta bowls on the table for the kids before turning back to collect the others. 

“Yeh, course. Why wouldn’t I be?” 

He shrugs but doesn’t give her a verbal answer. She doesn’t say anything either but smiles brightly when she sees her daughter for the first time that day. Liv has changed into her unicorn onesie and has her headphones wrapped around her neck. Grace doesn’t mind so much, even if it has become code for planning to leave the table as soon as she’s finished. 

“Looks yummy, Mom.” Liv says enthusiastically. Clearly, scoring a couple of goals at hockey had changed her personality. 

“Thanks darling.” She smiles back at her and decides to chance it and add some salad to their plates. 

These days, it may only be for twenty minutes that Grace can bask in the quiet, pleasantness of family time but it’s worth it and it can make even the most stressful of days inestimably brighter. Sam was happily chewing away on his food and Liv hummed a tune to herself between bites. Grace couldn’t imagine how her life would be without them both. She didn’t much want to imagine, either. 

It had been Dan who had given her this. Right when she needed saving from herself, he had been there. It had only been him. He had provided her with safety and love even if that love was expressed in his own way. It might not be a love that was romantic in the same way anymore, but people change. People grow up and the love changes with them but it doesn’t make it any less valuable or protective or vital for the survival of a marriage and a family. 

No matter what was going on in her head and no matter how often she found herself thinking about Andy, nothing could compare to this. Nothing would even come close. 

 *

#chris evans #andy barber #au fic #fanfiction #fan fic #case histories #andy barber x oc #chris evans fic #evans fic #andy barber fic

[educatedinyellow]

2021 Fanworks Masterlist

I’m rachelindeed on AO3, and educatedinyellow here on tumblr. Here’s a round-up of my fan creations this year :)

(vid) Peter Wimsey/Harriet Vane: You Matter to Me. A tribute to Peter and Harriet's evolving romance, from the 1987 BBC series starring Edward Petherbridge and Harriet Walter. 

(vid) Destiel: Fighting the Narrative. The forces of heaven, hell, and the narrative constantly put Dean and Cas into unwinnable, tragic situations, but they always fought to defy fate. Ultimately when the story ends, they break free and can write their own future together.

(fic) best things dwell out of Sight (Holmes/Watson, 9.5K, Ritchie Holmes) In a society where telepathic ability is too often equated with worth, Miss Mary Sutherland is short-Sighted. But that didn't stop her from smelling a rat in Mr. Hosmer Angel's courtship, and her case gives Holmes and Watson the chance to prove that the marriage of true minds requires no magic at all.

(vid) Holmes/Watson multiverse: Just Dance! It's a Holmesian dance party and everyone's invited!

(vid) Emma: Judge of your own happiness Emma learns the workings of her heart. A tribute to the lovely 2009 adaptation of Austen's "Emma."

(vid) Dean Winchester: My Kind of Man Dean's father taught him to be a certain kind of man, but throughout his life his loved ones try to help him figure out what kind of man he truly wants to be.

(vid) Destiel: Scarborough Fair Remember me to one who lives there; he once was a true love of mine.

Total number of completed things: 6 vids, 1 fic, plus 2 pencil sketches

Total word count: 9,600 words

Fandoms created for: Dorothy L. Sayers mysteries, Supernatural, Ritchie Holmes, Emma 2009 miniseries, plus a whole lot of Holmesian adaptations for my multiverse vid

Looking back, did you create more than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected? A little less, I think. This wordcount is pretty average for me, I usually bow out at around 10K words a year. But in recent years I've tended to make a few more fanvids than I did this year. In the last quarter of the year real life concerns took precedence, and that's fine.

What’s your own favorite creation of the year? I can honestly say I like them all, but my favorite vid is Scarborough Fair -- I've always thought the song was beautiful, and I think the match of lyrics and images turned out quite lovely. And I'm always pleased whenever I get a story written, because that's a good deal harder for me than any of my other creative endeavors. I loved taking the opportunity to add a little magical realism to a Victorian Holmes verse, I adore that kind of thing.

Did you take any creative risks this year? Not…really? Mostly I just did My Usual Sorts of Things :) I did see some progress this year though. I'm proud of the Diana Rigg portrait, it's a definite improvement for me in my sketching.

Do you have any goals for the new year? I have one fanvid already made that I'll be posting in the new year, but otherwise I have no idea what I'll be working on next. I tend to play things very much by ear.

Most popular creation of the year? Ahaha, this one is hilarious! So, the Ever Given got stuck in the Suez Canal, yes? Well, apparently YouTube's algorithms took that as a sign to start promoting the hell out of anything whatsoever with a nautical theme…As a result, a Master and Commander fanvid that I made in 2019 for a small Festivids exchange suddenly and completely unexpectedly took off. This thing had less than 10 likes on tumblr, but purely thanks to mysterious algorithm magic it's currently clocking in at 33,000+ views on YouTube. Truly the funniest and most random thing I could ever have achieved popularity with, LOL!

Creation of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: I'm glad whenever anyone looks at anything of mine! I do regret a little bit, though, that there is no online place within the large Destiel fandom devoted to sharing fanvids. I think Destiel fans might enjoy some of mine, but there's really nowhere in particular I can put them where they will be seen. I mean, I put them on AO3, obviously, but in my experience most people on AO3 are there looking for fic, not vids. And YouTube is not well organized for fandoms, there's too much else going on over there so these things tend to vanish quickly into the ether. *shrug* C'est la vie.

Most fun thing to make: Just Dance!! So many Holmeses, so many Watsons, even so many Moriartys! It finally introduced me to Sherlock Hound, which was a delight. Also, Lady Gaga's song is a bop and it was very cheering listening to it endlessly as I worked.

Most unintentionally telling thing: This was intentional, actually, but best things dwell out of Sight was the first fic in which I have been conscious of incorporating some of my feelings as an asexual person into my writing (not in a literal sense, the characters in the fic are not ace, but I'm personally aware of that element influencing some parts of the story).

Biggest disappointment: I've left Vimes/Vetinari languishing too long! Let's get those wheels moving again!!

Biggest surprise: I was so happy to hear that one of my tumblr friends enjoyed my Peter/Harriet vid and was prompted to check out the 1980s miniseries as a result, which they enjoyed very much! What a pleasure, to have gotten to introduce them to something they wound up falling in love with the same way I did!

Wishing you all the best for 2022, creatively and in all other ways, too!

#end of year round-up #masterlist #writing meme #my fanworks

[mickeytheticklee]

13 wishes

Warning: Tickling

Was supposed to be a long fic but I got writers block 😭

For weeks ever since Queendom began Loona has been blowing off dates with you. The date you wanted to get ice cream with Jinsoul? Couldn't do that. Movie night with Haseul? Nope. Saving the planet with Jiwoo? Forget about it. Even wanting a 2 year anniversary dinner to celebrate living with them couldn't happen. No amounts of tickle teases can put you in a happy mood, and the girls had to learn that the hard way. You showed their attitude after their Satellite remix performance on Queendom. Afterwards Sooyoung noticed it and tickled your feet, surprised by you not laughing. She was worried as feet tickles always cheer you up. None of them knew why until you wanted to get your hopes up again and ask them to hang out. They said yes to a picnic date, but soon called off when you got finished making everything. It frustrated you, and later you gave the delicious food to the BBC staff members and slammed the door shut.

Jungeun: She's coming! Quick! In positions!

COVID rates were rising so there weren't many opportunities to go out. But still, Loona's creativity never falls short. The girls knew and immediately felt bad. They hated how you were avoiding them, eating alone, barely wanting your tickles before bed. They wanted that back but needed to work hard to get it. You came back home from your job as a BBC employee and realized you had forgotten your key. From the time you knew someone had to be there so you gave a soft knock at the door. Opening it was Heejin, in the outfit she wore during the Shake it performance. You wanted to go in, not being in the mood of Heejin's bubbly personality. Her improv acting came in, with a restaurant employee persona guiding you to your table (which is the couch).

Heejin: Welcome to the Orbit restaurant! Let me show you to your table. Right this way please.

You ended up going to their plan which might give you a change of heart. You see everyone trying to be busy besides Vivi and Jiwoo, who were cooking. Heejin places you on the couch and hands you the menu, with only one possible food item. Yea you could tell their creativity lacked in the food department. Heejin left, and soon became another bubbly waitress, Yerim. She did that one introduction she had when she was younger and welcomed you to the dorm in restaurant. She gives off a small warning in a whisper, saying of the possible tickle monster fever running around. You weren't exactly in the mood for tickles until Jungeun comes from behind the couch to tickle your armpits for a quick second. You did laugh, only because the tickling came by unexpectedly.

Y/n: HEHEHHEHHEHHEHE

Yerim: See, our motto is to make sure all our guests are happy.

But you're the only guest here. Yerim gives you a fancy glass of what you think is wine. Drinking it you realized it was strawberry soda. You looked at the menu and saw one item called tickle surprise, which was their way of adding tickles to your meal. Again you must stay away from tickles. You were mad at them, no tickles. Coming towards the couch with an appetizer of bread was Yeojin, setting it down politely followed by a forehead kiss. She knew forehead and tummy kisses would make you open up to them. She pretends to drop a butter knife on the ground to get a quick pinch in at your thigh. You were whining that you smiled twice tonight when you were doing so good all day. But Yeojin was smiling with her tongue out, a habit of hers whenever she sees you finally happy after so long.

Yeojin: Sorry, your smile was adorable...

Y/n: Still mad at you guys...

She leaves and while that happens Chaewon pretends to fix Hyeju's makeup. You could tell she was in charge of entertainment (even though she always forgets the lyrics when singing). Some smooth jazz plays on Jinsoul's speaker as Hyeju comes toward you, putting her hand out. She asks if she can dance with you, going along with the skit you say yes. She brings you off the couch and grabs your waist, slow dancing with you. It did make your heart a tad bit warm because Hyeju is rarely intimate with you. But still, there needed to be involvement of tickling so she had her cold hands under your shirt, touching your back. Hyeju was smirking at how you were holding back a smile until she uses her finger to go up and down your spine.

Y/n: AH! AH!

Hyeju: What's wrong? Your starting to squeak. Are you feeling shy around me?

Punching the wall and hating Hyeju right now because of this. The music stopped as the girls prepared a song where everyone had to sing. The plan was more than a simple low budget dinner. Of the week where the girls felt bad they wrote a song using Jinsoul's producing skills and Haseul's lyricist skills. They didn't have a piano for this sorrowful ballet so they had Hyunjin play the piano as a recording. Sad songs weren't heartbreaking to you as you spent days listening to them a month ago. But this made you break down sobbing. Probably because Vivi sang the chorus or that Jungeun was doing a high note with Jiwoo. You burst into tears, as that wasn't the plan. But seeing how you were crying and apologizing they comforted you and listened to you.

Y/n: I'm sorry...

Haseul: Were sorry for not hanging out with you. We'll promise to do better baby.

You all group hug it out as Jiwoo wipes your tears off. Dinner was still in preparation so Hyeju and Heejin we're singing to heat (followed by terrible voice cracks everywhere). Then they did Shake It, still more voice cracks but this time it was from Chaewon. Soon after the terrible singing of Sistar songs dinner for one was finally ready. You got ready to eat by washing your hands, and before you turned on the sink Sooyoung took you to her bed for her before dinner raspberries. You haven't had it in a long time so your guard went down when she took your waist. She sets you on the bed and gives you a big raspberry on your neck. Making your big belly laughter, which you've been holding onto, came back alive. Sooyoung missed your belly laughter the most. It reminded her that you were too cute when you first met her that she wanted to tickle you so bad. And she did.

Y/n: SOOYOUNG HAHAHHAHQH! PLEASE ITSBBEENSOLONGAHHAHHA!!

Sooyoung: No, I must makeup for the times I miss so I'll do more. If you complain one more time I'll bring Vivi in.

Heard by Vivi when she enters the room. Happy to feel included she plops on the bed and tickles your neck while Sooyoung does her raspberries on your tummy. Sooyoung stopped as she thought the dinner could get cold if she continued tickling you. But Vivi was still hungry so Sooyoung gave her the opportunity to raspberry your tummy a few times before eating. Vivi carried you to the kitchen for some delicious shrimp scampi, your favorite food. No wonder why Jiwoo and Vivi were slaying on the hot stove. The food was delicious! You were enjoying it happily with Hyunjin on your lap and Yerim poking your cheeks whenever you were stuffing your food like a chipmunk. Hyunjin was adorable with her big cat eyes, tickling your neck before kissing your neck.

Hyunjin: Miss you so much baby.

Y/n: Me too but hehhehehehe stop tickling me.

After the group introduced you to a dessert, which wasn't on the menu. The cake Jiwoo bought at the cafes from Chuu can do it. You got jealous that Vivi and Heejin got cakes from that place so Chuu made sure to give it to you. You were in a much happier mood, making the members joyful that their baby was back. Now that she was back...time for more tickles! Jinsoul hugged you, feeling good that you were back and lightly tickled your full tummy. You were squirming to get away but Heejin caught your legs, unable to get pass those tummy tickles. In your defense you were trying to hide it, only because it felt like it wasn't the best time after feeling like you've ignored their feelings. But time flies so fast before the tickle intake pressures you to laugh.

Y/n: HAHAHHAHAH PLEASE STOP IT HAHHAHHAHA

Jinsoul: You seem extra shy about your tummy. Want me to kiss the shyness away?

Y/n: NO NO NOOOO!!

Jinsoul was doing little noms on your belly getting you to laugh. You couldn't squirm from Heejin's strength holding your legs together. So your stuck with Jinsoul's noms and belly kisses. Soon they had to head to sleep because they needed to wake up bright and early for practice. It was a bit saddening since the tickling just started but again, they were still idols with a full time job. So you tell them goodnight and thank them for the fun day you had today. It made them sad so as a last minute nod by Haseul they all tickled you before going to bed. All of them. Yes that's right all of them tickled you, which only happened once and it was during their first win.

Y/n: WAIT WAIT NOT ALL OF YOU HAHHAAHHAHA

It was torture, but the good kind. No but you were tortured by all of yyxy plus Yeojin and Hyunjin were attacking your worst spot. You were screaming as you couldn't imagine this many lers on one lee. Back in their arms again, happy as can be.

#kinda sad but pls enjoy #i made the theme about dinner theater after watching bobs burgers lol #at least it has some tickling #but why do my loona fics come out terrible sobbing rn #support loona on queendom #kpop tickle #loona

[houseofbrat]

Do you think the ANL will win their appeal tomorrow? I certainly hope so, I need some good news and desperately want to see justice. I hope that Meghan is nervous and is having an awful day. She knows what she did to her father, evil twisted b****.

I think they'll win the appeal on the privacy portion. I don’t think they can let that stand given what has come out during ANL’s appeal. Not so sure about copyright. 

My understanding of UK civil court procedure is that Meghan’s law firm already knows the verdict/judgement, as it is available to them 24 hours prior, but they can’t tell her or else they’ll be disbarred. Go figure. 

Anyhow, I figure that Meghan will likely have some pr ploy in the wings tomorrow regarding the results. I say this because Thursday is the last prime pr day of the week. Whatever the results are, she’ll want to completely capitalize on it. Can’t do it on Friday because people dump news they don’t want people to know about on Fridays. 

The judgement comes out in court (71) at 10 am UK time, which makes it 5 am Eastern in the US. How long does the court take to read and give the judgement/verdict? I have no idea, but I’d allot them thirty minutes. This means by 5:30 am Eastern/2:30 am Pacific the result will be known to the US media. I believe all the morning US talk shows start at 6 am Eastern. (Delays for Western & Pacific time zones.) 

Are we going to see Megs on a US talk show tomorrow morning? If she “loses” even one portion, such as the privacy portion of the case, will she be whining on American media about it? I suspect so. That girl is going to try and head off any potentially bad headlines about her lying/forgetting to the court and prompting a new trial. 

Even if she were to “win” completely, aka ANL loses their appeal, I think she’d still take the opportunity to talk up her victim complex with the US media when you consider the timing of the BBC “documentary” from this past Monday. 

In less than twelve hours, we’ll know how this is going to shake out. I don’t think it’s going to shake out that well for her, which means we should be bracing for some kind of crazy stunt by her to deflect from the real story, just as she did during the hearings a few weeks ago.

#ask #Meg's Legal Hissy #Meghan goes FULL MARKLE! #NEVER go full Markle #stunt queens #duchess of I NEED PRESS #duchess of I WILL NOT BE IGNORED BRF!!! #duchess of mean #crazy sociopathic bitch Megs Markle

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

It's been a while since I've done a Chortle headlines roundup. I used to do them more regularly, then I did a couple in a row where it was heavy on the post-documentary Russell Brand headlines, and that was so depressing that I cut them out for a while. Let's do a new one. I'll make this one shorter.

Oh for the love of God, Chortle. Please do not make me look at weeks of Ricky Gervais headlines in the leadup to/aftermath of the video release of Armageddon. He could not possibly need the publicity less, for so many reasons. Obviously you shouldn't be a cunt. Everyone who's going to think that already thinks it, everyone else isn't going to change, don't make us fucking read about it.

This looks like a headline that would appear on some sort of parody show. You know, if the BBC hadn't cancelled all its news/topical parody shows in the name of the exact balance mandate that I assume is the subject of that article, though I don't actually know, I'm not clicking on that.

You are doing New Year's Treat wrong, guys. It's supposed to be on New Year's and it's also supposed to have people who are famous (sorry, I'm sure it'll be fun and the people they've cast will be fine, I'm just still mildly annoyed that this year was their one chance to cast John Oliver while he was striking, the stars aligned with him having recently worked with Alex on the Horne Section show, it's gone forever now).

If anyone has the opportunity to see Pierre Novellie's Why Are You Laughing when he tours it next year, I cannot recommend it highly enough. I'm now wishing I had recommended other things less highly in the past, so I could lend more weight to this one. It's amazingly funny, and amazingly well written. It should... I mean, I was thinking it should be a strong contender for the best show (of Edinburgh 2023) award until I heard Ahir Shah's show, and I do now think they made the right choice in giving it to Ahir Shah. But it was the second best Edinburgh 2023 show, of the 40-ish I've heard. It should at least have been nominated.

Can I say something mildly sacrilegious? I'm not sure about this. I am obviously a devotee of Sam Campbell, and my view of Lucy Beaumont has wavered slightly as I've come to realize just how much she's maybe not kidding most of the time, but I do find her very funny. I just think... the proverbial straight man in a comedy group exists for a reason, you know? I don't know how well it'll work to put those two together without someone else to balance it out, they won't have anything to play off. It feels a bit too heavy on Avalan throwing together two fan favoruites from a popular TV show, more than thinking about what pairings would actually work well together. Especially since there doesn't seem to be a planned format or anything. I also don't really think they're as similar as people have suggested.

Having said that, obviously I'm going to listen to this, and I can absolutely picture a scenario in which I finish the first episode and write a glowing post about how I've been proven wildly wrong and concede that I should never have doubted their brilliance. I hope it happens that way.

I know I'm mildly annoyed at him right now, but this show is very good and people should see it if they can. One of my favourite things out of all he's ever done. He did a little preview of bits he's added to it on the latest Bugle episode, and I enjoyed that a lot.

Oh fuck off. No, come on, fuck off. You are not going to force me to engage with whatever the fuck VR is by having Mae Martin do it. It won't work.

...Having said that, is there a way to take a VR set and turn it into nice normal 2D video so I can watch the Mae Martin set? I have no idea if that's possible and I refuse to Google it, no one needs to encourage Mark Zuckerburg. But obviously I want to see what Mae Martin's doing.

I quite enjoyed this little clip. I've never been to Scotland, but this is exactly how I imagine the Edinburgh Festival, I'm currently planning a probably-actually-for-real-this-time trip for Edinburgh 2024, and I will be wildly disappointed if the festival isn't exactly like this.

Weirdly, there was nothing on the Chortle front page about Benjamin Zephaniah dying. He wasn't a comedian or anything, but he had connections to British comedy. I can't lie and say I was incredibly familiar with his work, but I really liked the poems of his that I'd heard and read (I did seek a few out and read them after seeing him on TV, as I quite liked him), and thought he came across very well every time I saw or heard him. And, obviously, 65 is too young and that would be a tragedy even if he weren't a very talented poet.

[riverdale-retread]

Riverdale S5 E14 (The Rabies Episode) - 5 Things I loved/ 3 Things to Consider.

Things I loved

1) What good are you? What do you even do? - I’m a writer! I tell stories!

I love the interesting and frankly, very funny thoughts that Riverdale the show keeps putting out about writing, the ethics of fiction, and how it feels to be a fiction creator through the character of Jughead.   The writers of Riverdale are describing us the viewers to be these overwhelming, demanding RATS (and as ‘customers’ of their product we are ‘King’)  that have trapped them in a tunnel (of the writer’s room? RAS, maybe you need to update their furniture?)  hollering at them to entertain us while they desperately try to tell us a story so we don’t kill them.  I hope this doesn’t court controversy but I was much more appeased by this depiction of me than the BBC Sherlock thing that portrayed its own fans as crazy pathetic loons.  Riverdale writers think we’re insane too, but they find us scary and they want to please us. Very gratifying. (I’m a happy customer.)

2)  Related:  I LOVED that Jughead is not a snob about genre.  Getting published and read by a lot of people is the point! I love that about him. So he did maybe learn something in his one year at college.

3) I loved the variation on ‘darkness’ and ‘dark hole’ that they worked out for each of Betty, Jughead and Archie.  It’s literal and metaphor (they can’t see where they’re going, they can’t easily escape, the air is close and poisoned, there’s danger in the dark hole and so on).  The literary dorkiness of the episode structure was fabulous. 

For Jughead it’s a mirror image replica of what happened to him before - Jughead falls into an abandoned subway tunnel via a sudden sinkhole that opens up underneath him during a period of life that’s supposed to be triumphant, exactly like how as he’d finally finished with high school and was about to embark on college like his dad always wanted, Betty took the security of his relationship with her away from him and he descended to a state of absolute homelessness in the bunker.  

For Archie, the boy who tried to be all the things everyone around him wanted him to be, becoming a miner comes about because someone else (Cheryl) wanted to defeat Hiram Lodge (which Archie is always up for) and all the other boys in his ‘gang’  are looking for economic opportunities and a group project (which Archie is also always up for).   

For Betty, the hubristic violent girl who denies how much she enjoys violence and always just goes wading into danger, the scale of the consequences she faces for her reckless brand of courage has gotten much more serious, because she’s an adult.  From having a serial killer (Hal, her father) very interested in her and then being in a game set up by a different serial killer (Penelope, her aunt by marriage), Betty’s ‘hole’ moment is to be the sole prey of a serial killer who will not grant her freedom of movement, and isn’t trying to make some sort of moral point or work out a piece of their own psychology.  TBK purely wants Betty to suffer and die  - there’s nothing for her to figure out with her intellect.

4)  I loved that the show firmly concludes that there is no talking and feeling your way through to somewhere better with a misogynist.  It’s not that misogynist women killers don’t know that women are people, that women have pasts and a right to live and all of that. They know. They like trampling on the thing that is precious and beautiful, and it’s fun for them to hurt women. This is very dark, but on really bad days I can fall into this thinking, and I felt seen.   Same goes for Alice giving into despair and advising Betty to just kill the bastard. I know how that feels too.

5)  This is another weird thing to love, but I love that Archie’s fundamental decency and kindness is not enough to overcome the weight of his war trauma.  And yet he’s capable when it comes to an emergency.  The tendency that Archie has to run towards the screaming is similar to what Kevin used to be like, and I admire this about him.  I very much appreciated that Eric and Uncle Fucking Frank and all the guys who down in the mine want Archie to get professional help for his problems.  

3 Things to Think About

a. Jughead never graduated from college.  So he set himself up for the social isolation and failure in New York City.  To have no job to go to, to have no cluster of acquaintances you can carry over from being students in the same institution for two to four years, or being a part of a religion, in a major city, is kind of dooming yourself to failure in this regard.  I’ve thought Jughead no longer wanted to go to college but had gone purely for FP (with whom he no longer speaks much) which is why he finds it so unrewarding.

b. Cheryl is an ‘author’ in the same way Jughead is, but she seems to see the darkest possible side of the people she ‘portrays’ and ‘frames’ which is in direct opposition to Jughead, who ‘writes’ people the way he wishes they could be, as their best selves.  Then he falls in love with his creation and believes in it so hard that he hallucinates his own subconscious and intuition in their image (Betty).

c. I’m very interested in the Jess-Jughead relationship.  When he goes to visit her after their breakup (when she still has his manuscript I think??) her apartment is well appointed and tidy.  So it’s Jughead that’s the slob, and Jessica was just vengefully matching him debris for debris.

#riverdale s5 opinion #riverdale positivity #jughead jones #archie andrews