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imaginesig · 2 days

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“Could someone give a message to the smallest man who ever lived”

Lewis Hamilton x Reader

The reader is a singer-songwriter who just broke up with long term fiancé Lewis Hamilton. Of course she wrote a gut wrenching album to cope.

This is gonna be a lot of shitting on Lewis— absolutely no hate! I just love a good heartbreak and the Tortured Poets Department

Also dates aren’t accurate bc I don’t have time to worry abt all that and I totally stole all of this from real life- not an ounce of originality

yn_ln

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yn_ln: pinky promise to always by your side 🏎️

Tagged: lewishamilton

lewishamilton pinky promise to always be by YOUR side

yn_ln ♥️

mercadesamgf1 always a pleasure to host our pop princess!

yn_ln always a pleasure to be hosted!!

user1 looks always kill in the paddock

user2 ugh to be in the F1 paddock watching my driver fiancee on weekends I'n not touring

user3 stunning!!

user4 the pinky promise makes me physically ill😭

user5 fr WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN

carmenmmundt gorgeous! Always a good time with you 🫶

yn_ln dinner soon?

carmenmmundt yes please!!

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lewishamilton

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lewishamilton: could’ve been better but back to work for next week

Tagged: yn_ln

user1 being a Hamilton fan used to be fun, I used to be happy

user2 the second photo is so fanfic coded I can't

user3 omg yes!!

user4 maybe Ferrari will be championship #8

user5 hottest couple in the paddock

mercadesamgf1 watch out Australia 👊💥

yn_ln

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yn_ln: Argentina I’m so glad we were able to dance my best dress with you! Until next time 🫶🎇

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user1 BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE

user2 babe wake up a dancing Taylor post just dropped

sabrinacarpender such an electric crowd!!

yn_ln thank you for your hype work

lewishamilton: wonderful show once again!!

user3 best night ever

user4 AHHH STUNNING

user5 manifesting tickets so hard rn

lewishamilton posted a story

Caption: Help me hold on to you ♥️

ynupdates

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ynupdates: Superstar Y/n L/n and boyfriend Lewis Hamilton after her show in Argentina!!

tagged: lewishamilton, yn_ln

user1 LMAO the update account rlly said she's everything and he's just Ken

user2 the wine was iconic!!

user3 omg that's my photo!!

user4 we thank you for your service

user5 you know she was jumping with joy bc of those boots

user6 omg irl! I can't imagine how her feet feel after heels all show

user7 they are so sweet

user8 get yourself a man who takes you out after work

user9 my fav couple fr fr

Twitter—

yn_ln

liked by sabrinacarpender, carmenmmundt, user9, and 928,029 others

ln_yn: Round of applause for Brazil for their incredible rain show!!

tagged no one

user1 the first pic 😳

user2 chills, literal chills

user3 the entire vibes of the whole show was wow

user4 I agree and I was watching through a fuzzy live stream

user5 anybody else need illicit affairs (angry verson) on Spotify now

user6 me me me!!

user7 Y/n make it happen

user8 it kinda felt personal ngl

user9 best night ever!! I went as fearless in a gold dress and to say I danced in a storm in my “best dress” with Y/n was incredible!!

user10 omg that’s so lucky!!

yn_ln

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yn_ln: Thank you South America for welcoming me with open arms for this leg of the tour!! I will miss you all dearly over break but rest and relaxation is important for an awesome European leg!!

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user1 I’m gonna miss the fuzzy live streams 😭

user2 gets some rest Queen!!

user3 I can’t wait for the second leg!! Let’s go Europe🫶🫶

user4 it’s go time to get my Eras outfit

user8 I need ideas!!

user4 me and my boyfriend are going as Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

user9 I’m dressing in a white dress with a small veil that says “fucked in the head” and messed up makeup bc champagne problems is one of my favs

user10 I love it!!

user5 anybody else sad Lewis wasn’t at these last few shows, nor was she at any races or seen near mercades home base

user6 they’ve been together for 6 years, I’m not worried abt them spending some time focused on their jobs without each other

user7 yea and they’re really private so I’m sure they’ll catch up plenty during her break

lewishamilton

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lewishamilton: not the results we needed but that’s what growing is all about

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lewishamilton

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lewishamilton: that’s P2💪

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mercadesamgf1 that's our driver!!🏆

georgerussell congrats man! bloody good driving today

lewishamilton double point weekend

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Twitter—

yn_ln

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yn_ln: All’s fair in love and poetry, April 4th

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Twitter pre-album release—

Twitter post-album release—

yn_ln

liked by: user433, user94, user93, and 282,209 others

yn_ln: surprise!! "The Tortured Poets Department: Eros" out now!! This edition includes two new songs, "So High School" and "The Alchemy"

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#f1 #f1 imagines #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 imagines #formula 1 smau #lewis hamilton smau #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton #smau #the tortured poets department #formula 1 x reader #f1 smau #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 fic

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ladykailitha · 2 days

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Slipping on my evil author gloves and cracking my knuckles before diving in!

It's post-season 4 (with the canon divergence of Eddie living) and Steve and Eddie are falling in love while they figure out how to destroy Vecna for good.

But there are moments when it's quiet at night Steve will hear someone shouting his name.

"--TEVE!"

But it's always garbled like static over the walkie or shouts underwater. And every time Eddie pulls him close and whispers that it's just a nightmare. No one is calling him, everyone is safe.

They defeat Vecna and Eddie and Steve make plans to leave Hawkins together.

But when Steve arrives a little early at the trailer, he finds that Eddie was just going to slip away without telling him.

Eddie laughs. Tells him that no one wants him around. The kids will get driver's licenses and won't need rides anymore. Robin will run off with Nancy to Emerson and he'll be left all alone. Like he deserves to be.

But as Eddie starts laughing, Steve can hear the yelling again.

"Get the tape out his tape deck in his car!"

Steve is frowning. Who's tape deck?

Eddie notices the little confused frown and mockingly tells him that he was just too dim to notice that everyone secretly hated him.

Suddenly the air is filled with music.

Soldier boy, made of clay Now an empty shell Twenty one, only son But he served us well Bred to kill, not to care Do just as we say Finished here, greetings death He's yours to take away

Eddie's face transforms from mocking to enraged. His body starts shaking and convulsing. There is a strange after image and Steve takes a step back.

Vecna appears and Steve turns around. In the doorway of the trailer is the real Eddie and behind him is Steve's bedroom. He doesn't even look back, he starts running.

His back erupts in pain multiple lines burning all the way down.

****

Eddie walks into the Harrington mansion cautiously. He's never just strolled right in without Steve calling out to him.

But his car is here and none of the kids have heard from in 24 hours and even Robin is freaking out. Steve was supposed to work that morning, but never showed.

Two things that Steve would never do.

He starts searching the house but comes up empty. He's standing in the main hallway rubbing his chin when he hears it. Whimpering.

Eddie storms up the stairs and throws open the bedroom door. Steve is on the bed, complete asleep but clutching the sheets as he tosses and turns.

Eddie grabs the walkie and screams code red! And tells everyone to get their asses to Steve's ASAP.

Everyone who could get there arrives within minutes.

"I can't wake him!" Eddie screams as everyone stumbles into the bedroom.

Everyone tries what they can to wake him, but nothing.

Then El comes bursting through the door. "It's Vecna!"

"Why would Vecna target Steve?" Dustin asks and everyone glares at him. "What? I'm not saying he's not important or whatever, but..." he waves at El, Nancy, and Will. "Like."

Eddie growls and screams. "Get the tape out his tape deck in his car!" He turns to Robin. "Where does he keep his Walkman?"

Robin ran for his top drawer and handed it to him.

Dustin wasn't back yet.

"Dustin!" Robin screams as everyone else watches in silent vigil.

Dustin comes scrambling up the stairs and hands it to Eddie.

"Why is it a Metallica tape?" he says softly.

Eddie jams it into the Walkman and hits play. He places the headphones over Steve's ears and holds his hand as he waits. He was about to say he didn't care what the tape was when the song starts playing. The volume up as loud as it could be.

"Shit."

"Eddie?" El asks, tilting her head to the side.

Eddie and Dustin share a glance of just shattered emotions.

"It's called Disposable Heroes, El," Mike whispers.

Suddenly the air is still and growing stale with each passing moment as they all take in the meaning of that.

Then Steve comes to, gasping and crying. Suddenly he's covered in bodies as they all desperately try to hug him all at once.

Eddie gets close and whispers, "You are loved, Steve Harrington and tell Vecna he made a mistake targeting you. We will come for him with a fierceness like the of a fire storm."

El grins. "Done."

#my writing #stranger things #steddie #ladykailtiha writes #heavy angst #angst with a happy ending

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a-substantial-trash-pile · 10 hours

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hey guess what. it's finally time for my Stardew Valley Loredump. i’m about to ramble about my farmer and yo-yo/yoba and shane in a probably long-ass, disjointed post because i have a problem ok. not expecting anyone to read it all of course—just want to finally write these brainstorming shenanigans down. the loredump will be below the cut below the image 👇 (WARNING: IT'S LONG):

SAMUEL IZAWA:

*samuel is 28 years old, pan, japanese okinawan (no im not self projecting hahaha), and goes by he/they. main thing is that they’re from “our world” where stardew valley is a video game, but he died and ended up in the stardew universe. because i think isekai tropes are fun and silly. as the player, samuel can do things others in the stardew world can’t do, such as:

summon the in-game HUD that’s only visible to him, so he can see health/energy levels and inventory and all that.

speaking of inventory, it’s essentially a pocket dimension samuel can shove stuff in. the inventory doesn’t really care about size/weight/etc as long as it’s something the system considers an “item.” so like samuel can put a whole ass four poster bed in there but he can’t do that to a person or a whole house. samuel just needs to touch the item to make it disappear into his inventory. he can then summon it back out when he needs it. the game’s inventory limit system remains the same. samuel gets 12 slots on their own, but if they have a bag on them it increases to 36.

can access the player menu you can normally access in game. so like profile, skills, collections, relationships, etc are all there. no options or quit tab though. having the relationship tab is a nightmare for samuel, who has major insecurities about what people think of him. that tab is a quantifiable measure on how much people like him. it a real brain demon for him to know it exists and is right there for him to access anytime.

can see the “stats” of food and healing items. hp/energy recovery amounts, buffs, etc.

*funny thing is that samuel has never played SDV himself and only has knowledge based on what he’s heard and seen online secondhand. ironically he was planning on playing the game for the first time before the whole dying thing ruined it. they can’t even remember how they died, but it doesn’t bother them as much as they think it should. they didn’t leave much behind in that life.

*anyway, i’m talking a lot of game terms here, but don’t get it twisted. while samuel has all these game systems going on, the SDV world is very much a real one that doesn’t normally work by that logic. by that i mean time flows normally like in our world and there isn’t just 4 months in a year. things exist outside the valley. there’s a whole planet of places and people.

*luckily samuel has help in navigating this new world in the form of yo-yo the junimo, who is the first living thing samuel sees when he first wakes up in that joja cubicle. yo-yo helps explain a lot of things and guide samuel around in its own abrasive way. he’s also there to be like, “hey i gave you a second chance at life so you kinda owe me actually. sign this contract.” and samuel, who is a pushover and also confused, is just like, “ok.” (yo-yo sounds like danny devito btw. because i think it’s funny.)

*i call the contract a “magical girl contract” because that’s essentially what it is. samuel gets access to extra powers/abilities on top the stuff he can already do as a player. in return he fights monsters n shit for yo-yo and generally does things for them that they can’t do easily on their own. the extra benefits include:

higher pain tolerance. which isn’t always a good thing. especially when you tend to not be great with self-preservation like samuel is.

can heal most injuries by just eating/drinking stuff to regain hp.

yo-yo can teleport the both of them around as needed, but it’s tiring and it drains a lot of magic. distance matters too.

yo-yo can spawn items but it drains magic as well. the more valuable/rare the item, the more draining it is. spawning items is already a magic-intensive thing in the first place. also yo-yo isn’t creating the item out of nothing. they’re actually randomly taking it from wherever it already exists in the world. for example, say yo-yo “spawns” a jar of pickles. somebody in the world is going to open their fridge and discover their jar of pickles is missing or maybe a grocery store will have a sudden empty spot on its shelf. yo-yo doesn’t have control of where the items are taken from (or so they claim).

samuel and yo-yo’s magic pools became connected so they can both do more than they could do on their own before. this is one of the reasons why yo-yo wanted a contract with samuel, who has a larger magic pool than normal due to being from another world. but it’s possible for one side to use up all the magic for the both of them.

*samuel’s personality can be summed up as Awkward People-Pleasing Tired Sad Garbage Dork. either he’s dressed like a grandparent in sweaters and turtlenecks or he’s wearing a button up shirt with the collar undone and jeans. they usually have their neck covered in public to hide the mark of yoba embedded there. he has a “resting bitch face” as some may call, but that’s just because his brain is busy over-analyzing 193828 different things. he loves being outside in the grass and dirt, looking at bugs n shit. he’s also a nerd who likes to play video games and ramble about the lore in them (he likes RPGs the most, but if the game’s got a good story and cool world, he’s into it). they like to do things with their hands like model building/painting. in their new stardew life, they get into woodcarving after willy teaches them the basics (he carves shane a little chicken).

*samuel does NOT know how to say “no.” absolute pushover. their self-worth is based on how much they’re liked by others, which isn’t healthy obviously. he has a fear that the only way he can be liked is by being useful. he’s scared that he is inherently a bad and selfish person, because he can’t say for sure if he’s helping others purely out of kindness or because it just makes him feel better about existing. deep down there’s anger/frustration that’s accumulated over the years, anger towards himself and also others because he’s always doing things for other people—going above and beyond—but it never feels like enough. at the same time though, they hate it when these thoughts come up because they believe that you shouldn’t go into helping somebody expecting that you’ll get something out of it. he hates how much of a hypocrite he is. he hates how he bases so much of his self-worth on the opinions of others, but feels helpless to it. they usually just push these emotions down because samuel feels guilty about them. how can they be a good person if they’re thinking like this? how can they deserve to exist with this mindset? however they get a chance to let out the anger/bitterness/frustration through fighting monsters. kind of disassociating in a way. this also isn’t a good thing because his demeanor is much colder and scarier during combat. having someone who’s felt powerless for so long suddenly gain power is a dangerous thing.

*this mindset when monster fighting shatters when samuel meets krobus and realizes that monsters aren’t just the simple enemy NPCs their brain had been automatically categorizing them as. guilt galore. he gets real depressed about that for a while but yo-yo, krobus, and shane are there to help him.

*SPEAKING OF SHANE… it’s crush at first sight for samuel because hot damn is shane their type. i mean just look at him. mamma mia. haha anyyyway, they first meet at the stardrop saloon. samuel’s waiting at the bar for his to-go order near where shane is drinking. shane’s looking sad, so samuel gives in and decides they’ll start a convo to maybe distract him from whatever’s bothering him. samuel employs the “crack a dumb joke to hide the fact that i’m nervous because i’m talking to a hot person and then use that opening to introduce myself” strat. shane, being an asshole, is like, “oh so you’re the new farmer. here’s a tip: don’t bother me.” samuel takes 999 damage and their brain immediately goes “THIS IS MY FAULT I FUCKED UP like who wants to be talked to by a stranger when they’re sad goddammit why am i so bad at this?!!” it’s overall not a great first impression. after that, samuel tries to avoid shane out of embarrassment, but circumstances keep making them run into each other. for instance, samuel works a lot with marnie with her being a mentor figure to him in animal husbandry, so he and shane have a lot of opportunity to interact through that (plus marnie is secretly trying to get them closer to each other). through these meetings and shenanigans, samuel and shane get to know each other better until one day they’re friends. then good friends. then best friends. then kiss friends. then marry friends. :)

YOBA (A.K.A. YO-YO):

*yo-yo is ????? years old and goes by any pronouns but most of the time it's it/they.

*yo-yo is actually THE yoba, but they’re not the completely benevolent creator-of-all-things humans have made them out to be. maybe they were in the past, but now they’re selfish and rude and swear a lot. but they do still care, even if they don’t admit it (tsundere-ass). yoba is currently stuck in the form of a little junimo and is substantially weakened because it gave too much of itself away to the world in the past and got burned for it. because the world kept taking and taking. and now there’s war and pollution and shit and yoba/yo-yo is maybe just a teensy tiny bit angry and bitter now. but it’s ok because now they got this human from another reality to help them reclaim the pieces of itself. and maybe along the way relearn how to love the world again.

*oh also yoba didn’t create the whole planet like the creation story claims. they’re technically an alien that came across a young planet full of life and decided to stay and help it develop.

*main reason yo-yo made a contract with samuel is because it needs help finding/reclaiming the pieces of itself. pieces can usually be found in strong monsters empowered by the piece. this isn’t always the case though. sometimes it’s in an ancient artifact. sometimes it’s in a specific place like a temple. sometimes it’s in a person.

*samuel doesn’t have to deal with having an existential crisis about yo-yo, since he’s from our world where yoba doesn’t even exist as a god. yo-yo claims to be the one responsible for bringing samuel over into the stardew universe, but there are holes in their story. where did yoba even find the power to do such a thing when they’re in such a weakened state? mysterious.

*the first time yoba reveals itself to shane is kind of chaotic. it’s in the middle of the night when yo-yo suddenly appears in shane’s room, grabs his face with its little stick arms and yells, “WAKE UP!!! YOUR BOYFRIEND IS IN MORTAL PERIL!!!” shane is like, “WHAT THE F–” it was an act of desperation on yo-yo’s part, because samuel was in trouble and shane was the only one it could think of going to for help. essentially samuel meets something Bad in the deep mines, something that takes him out of commission and puts him in a trance state while draining his lifeforce. y’know, the classic kind of trance state where you need to figure out how to get the person back–how to snap them out of it. yo-yo tried and failed, so that’s where shane comes in. it’s the classic “love-interest-breaks-main-character-out-of-mind-control-with-sheer-power-of-love” trope. except shane does punch samuel during it. lovingly. in the face. hey it works ok. after the chaos is over and everyone’s safe and gathered together, samuel and yo-yo explain everything to shane (well more like samuel explains everything while yo-yo wishes outloud that they had their memory erasing powers back). shane, who is canonically an atheist, learns that this talking pottymouthed jerkass apple is actually THE yoba and is just like, “yeah. this might as well happen.” and then he remains atheist because what else are you going to do when you learn that god is a talking pottymouthed jerkass apple who calls you a bitch and is also responsible for your partner having to go do dangerous shit. he and yo-yo have a rocky relationship at first to say the least. but once they both realize how much the other cares about samuel, things get a little better.

*yeah, yoba may be a bitch and they may be angry and they may be bitter, but they really do care, even if they try to convince themselves otherwise. even though so much got taken from it, it still cares about humans and dwarves and shadow people and everything else on the planet. and when it eventually comes down to it, yoba will step up to protect what it loves, even if it means losing everything again.

SHANE FINCH:

*this post was technically supposed to just be about my farmer and yo-yo’s lore and stuff, but i gotta give some personal headcanons i have about shane… like for instance his last name is “finch.” because i thought the bird theme was cute. he’s 29 years old, bi, and half asian, half white (in our world that asian half is korean). i’m not being specific because i don’t know if korea even exists in the stardew world, since all we know in the game is that there’s a “ferngill republic” and a “gotoro empire.” i was thinking of just headcanoning that stardew’s planet is essentially the same as earth. so like most of the same countries/nations exist except the history diverged a bit along the way, leading to the ferngill republic and gotoro empire. OK SORRY for the tangent—back on topic.

*so shane is a trans man who started transitioning back in high school. he had two best friends who were very supportive and really helped him on his journey to figure himself out. those two friends were like family to him. it was good that he had this support because his parents were always pretty shitty and shane transitioning just made them act even shittier. the only good family member of shane’s is marnie, who was supportive, but she lived far away, was busy, AND wasn’t on good terms with her sister (shane’s mom), so shane didn’t get to see her much.

*the moment shane became a legal adult, he got away from his parents, finding a place with his two best friends and moving in together. oh and his friends’ names were rosa and heath. should’ve probably mentioned that earlier oops. shane, rosa, and heath go to the same college together, suffer student loans, graduate, etc. haven’t thought of what shane would get a degree in yet—most likely something “generic” because he’s unsure of what he wants to do himself (i feel u bby).

*ok so rosa and heath were dating since high school, but they were so comfortable with shane and vice versa that things never got that awkward living together. however when rosa and heath got married (“yoba, FINALLY,” shane would say), shane felt like it was time to find his own place, much to the devastation of his bffs. the apartment ended up close to where rosa and heath lived of course—the couple made sure of it (“stop backseating my apartment hunting!” “MAKE US”).

*rosa and heath get pregnant and have a healthy baby girl that they name jasmine. i headcanon jas as black (from heath’s side) and portuguese (rosa’s side). everyone is thrilled about the baby. shane was immediately offered godfather role and he happily accepted. jas was the cutest baby ever and he adored her. he babysat jas all the time.

*jas was 4 years old when rosa and heath tragically passed away in a car accident. they were coming home from a business dinner when they lost control of their car on some black ice and slid into oncoming traffic. shane was babysitting jas when he got the call. in the span of one cold winter night, shane and jas’s world shattered.

*rosa and heath didn’t have any reliable relatives either. those relatives only came to take the money and belongings. shane was the only one jas had, so he adopted her. he tried his best to pick up the pieces. he really did. he lasted for a year trying to raise a kid on his own with the salary of a dead-end job, but he knew the situation wasn’t good with the money and how much his mental health was spiraling. he knew he and jas were in dire need of more support (“jas deserves better than this”). so he turned to the one person he had left to rely on: his aunty marnie. and that’s how shane and jas ended up in pelican town.

*shane’s joja jacket was actually originally rosa’s. rosa worked as an accountant for joja and would get free promotional items all the time from the company. the jacket was one of the only things she actually ended up using because “it’s pretty comfy for being joja bs.” she would wear it all the time, much to her more fashion-conscious husband’s chagrin (yet he would patch up any holes she’d get in it anyway). after rosa died, shane kept her jacket. there were a lot of memories in it.

~~~

ok that’s it for now. if anyone actually read all that, thank you for even wasting your time to process my ramblings. i’m sorry it’s so fucking long like jfc.

*who is mr. qi?

#stardew valley #stardew valley shane #stardew valley farmer #sdv shane #sdv farmer #sdv yoba #ocs #long post #loredump

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utilitycaster · 2 days

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i've seen some people say kipperlilly is neurodivergent but it's more them being like BUT THE RATGRINDERS ARE KIDS!!! and it's like yeah??? so are most of the characters in this show? it's set in high school? penelope everpetal is in hell right now? so idk why THESE kids are being treated differently

RIGHT.

I'm trying to answer a question about both the D20 discourse and the CR discourse but like. There is a post going around in the CR fandom about how it doesn't make sense to apply real-world morality to ttrpgs, which firstly is not entirely wrong but it's much more complicated than that and secondly and more importantly I'd take it way more seriously if it weren't coming from the people who threw a fit when I said that treating Imogen's powers as a metaphor for real-world queerness is reductive and stupid and who keep treating Orym's status as a guard as a member of like, the US Military. The real answer is "D&D settings have their own moral framework, and you need to make arguments based on those, rather than the real world, but there is often some overlap."

I think, as your post points out, this is one of those cases where you do need to work within the moral framework of the show. Penelope is in hell. It is a show about teenage adventurers. Two of the Bad Kids died in the second episode, famously. While I suspect they'd never cross the line of like, a serious romantic or sexual relationship between and adult and one of the high schoolers, in basically any other context the students of the Aguefort Academy are treated as children or adults based on, essentially, which is funnier. The way to get your magic GED is to battle monsters to the death. The way to graduate is to go on a full D&D adventure. It's normal for a high school senior to have access to like, Power Word Kill. The premise of this world is "D&D but in a John Hughes movie setting" and the premise of a lot of D&D is "killing your enemies is part of the story." Like, I've said this before (as has Brennan) but a big appeal of D&D is that you don't need to be patient and send a polite email and let the person who dangerously cut you off on the highway merge in because otherwise you'll get in an accident and smile through the microagressions (let alone put up with larger injustices); you can just straight up kill your way through problems and wake up the next morning fresh and refreshed with full HP and 8 hours of sleep behind you. You don't have to swallow your anger; you can cast fireball on a bitch. As I've also said before, if your entire table likes finding peaceful solutions in D&D, fine, play that way, but I came here to cast fireball and I find you preachy, boring, and stupid.

The rules of this world are "teens are full-blown adventurers and are treated as such." The Rat Grinders are on the same footing as the Bad Kids; there is no imbalance of power here (indeed, they even have the favor of some teachers themselves)! Yeah, if the Bad Kids were actually a bunch of 30-somethings this would play much differently but if they're their classmates? go off.

#answered #Anonymous #fhjy spoilers

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judesmoonbeauty · 3 days

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Alfons Sylvatica Chapter 2 - Semi-Summary

This is a fan translation only. Not 100% accurate. Please expect grammatical errors and translation inaccuracies. This is a SEMI-SUMMARY of each chapter. I am roughly translating this with out much research other than specific lines from certain scenes. Why? Because it's a huge task to translate a main route chapter line by line. So, this is what we're working with, and I appreciate your understanding ♥︎ Cybird owns everything. Re-blogs are appreciated, but please do not post my summaries elsewhere. Minors: Please DNI or consume this content. CW: Dub-Con. Dividers: @/natimiles

Kate wakes up the next morning and finds a shirtless Alfons sleeping next to her in bed. She freaks out and wakes Alfons up in the process who says, “Oh, is it morning already? Good morning, Kate.” She recalls how he came to her room the night before, kissed her and then they went to bed, but no lines were crossed at this point because he knew her body was too tired, but even so did they do other activities that only “lovers” do….she wasn’t sure.

Alfons: Did you have a good dream last night?

Kate: W-wha……from where….

The blurry line between dreams and reality were a shock to her, the fear from last night and the pleasurable kiss they shared was so real, but it still felt like a dream and she couldn’t help, but feel upset. Alfons laughs at her in amusement, and his smile makes her back away from him covering her naked body with the sheet.

Kate: Wow, did you do something to me?!

Alfons: Yes, I did. I did a lot of nice things.

Kate: I didn’t mean that…..!!

She frantically tries to remember why she thought that Alfons was her lover, knowing there must be some kind of trigger. She has a flashbacks to him in her room and the mission prior to that:

Kate: Worried?

Alfons: Yes, isn’t it obvious?

Alfons: Because - you are my lover.

Alfons: You’re dreaming. You’re having a very pleasant dream.

Back to the present, she recalls him touching the nape of her neck and him whispering to her in both instances, and then recalls the pile of dead bodies before he touched her. She mentions that he used his ability on her, and surmises it’s the ability to use illusions. He admits to it and then commends her deductive skills while breaking out in applause. However, he clarifies that his ability is to rewrite perceptions by simply touching the nape of ones neck and whisper, and she asks why he did it to her?

Alfons: Why, because…..it’s fun of course?

Alfons: Poor little robin, thrown into a cesspool of evil.

Alfons: You’re the funniest toy I’ve ever seen.

Kate: …..!! (Kate slaps his cheek.)

Kate: Disgusting……

Alfons: I like your reaction, much better than last nights.

Alfons laughs without straightening his clothes and flutters off her bed, and tells her that if she ever wants to cry again then he’s there for her. She screams “No, thank you!” and throws a pillow at him. Afterwards, she heads to the dining room for breakfast and Alfons is sitting their nonchalantly. She wants to turn on her heel, but she resists and takes a seat. Victor starts talking to her about the mission from the night before, and she asks what happens after she was hypnotized. Did they call the police? William explains to her that in East End there have been many murders, arsons, abductions etc. and yet the police chalk it up to something that “always happens in the slums”.

Kate watches the expressions of those around her: Liam & Harrison listen quietly to the information, Elbert looks down melancholically at it, Alfons doesn’t seem interested in the subject at all, and then there’s those whose eyes sparkle with joy…….“That’s where Crown comes in,” says Victor. He explains that rumor has it that the administrators of the orphanage and poorhouse are responsible for the series of incidents. Last night’s mission was a little prelude to gather information. William says that they are trying to uncover the reason all the administrators are banding together; is it money, ideology, or pleasure? “What do you think”, he asks her.

Kate says she doesn’t know and she can’t of a single reason as to why someone would want to do that, as she recalls the scene feelings well up in her chest making her feel like she’s trapped in a dark place. Alfons chimes in, “Well, you don’t need to know. It’s a hassle.”

Alfons: Some children die in this world without anyone knowing. That means there are some who think they’re nothing more than rubbish to be cleaned off the street.

Kate is stunned by such a statement from him, is this a brazen dereliction of duty despite Crown being tasked with such cases? They stare at each other and he smiles.

Alfons: - It doesn’t matter.

(It doesn’t matter?!)

Alfons: Miss Kate, are you sure? You don't want to hide this.

He taps his own neck and Kate is like, “neck”? Hide what? Liam starts to ask, “Hey Kate, isn’t that….”, and Ellis follows up, “It’s a hickey.”

Kate: What?!

Ellis peeks at her from behind and she covers her neck with the palm of her hand.

Kate: Wh-wh-why....…

Alfons: Well, because……that’s what I did to you, isn’t it?

Kate: …!

Her cheeks flush and Harrison asks Alfons if he’s already touched her? Alfons laughs and asks Kate how he should answer that question, but she is so embarrassed that she can’t say anything. He taunts, “Aw, you can’t say anything?” But, it’s not possible of knowing what really happened last night, and while she is struggling as to what to say, Jude enters says, “What, ya already been devoured? I’m sorry to hear that,” and lets out a loud laugh.

Kate: I’ve not been devoured!

Alfons: That’s terrible…..that you kissed me so passionately, but you were just playing around with me……?

Kate: ….. Weren’t you the one who played with me?!

Liam: Ah.

Harrison: Ahhh.

Ellis: You just admitted it.

Kate: Huh—!?

Alfons: Pfft, ahaha! This is the best, Kate!

Alfons: Victor, will you make her my exclusive?

Kate: What do you mean my ”exclusive”?

Kate wants the situation from escalating any further and Alfons explains that they’d be partners, buddies, a tag-team or whatever she wants to call it. Victor thinks it’s a great proposal after their hot night together, and Alfons says that he must take responsibility for their one night stand, but Kate doesn’t sense any sign of sincerity in his voice. Victor says that he doesn’t care as long as Kate agrees to it, to which, she declines saying she hates the idea. Alfons threatens her with, “Don’t say! If you do, I don’t know if I’ll do that again or not.” She is upset, but it was also her fault for not kicking him out of her room last night as soon as he entered, and Victor warned her that many members of Crown were morally bankrupt.

William makes the suggestion that Kate only accompanies Alfons on his missions and outside of that, she doesn’t need to be around him. Kate still doesn’t like the idea, but it’s better than being with him 24/7, so she agrees and Alfons says it’s fine.

Alfons: Well…..I look forward to working with you, Kate.

[Next] [Master List]

#alfons sylvatica #ikevil alfons #ikevil translations #ikemen villains #Ikémen villains translations #IkeVil JP spoilers

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nqmonarch · 1 day

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HUGE QUESTION/IDEA about Self Aware HSR

Characters: Misha, Gallagher, Tingyun, a small bit on Blade at the end

Huge spoilers for 2.2 and before

So how does Self Aware HSR with the characters that are no longer with us work? Are they still self aware?

Guys, I need you to think about how horrifying this is.

As I realized in a previous post HSR has Aeons but they also believe in Gods in some cultures, which would presumably be more powerful than Aeon and having more control over individual's lives than an Aeon. The biggest difference I think would be possible is a God being tied to the idea of an afterlife.

So imagine Tingyun was already blacking out whenever Phantylia possessed her body and she was left in a dark void. That was until you turned on HSR, after that she began to spectate the game much like a player. And then when Phantylia left her body and she returned to it she went back with unsettling knowledge and confusion.

It's not until she completely dies that she understands it. Honkai Star Rail is a video game and she is just a character in it. When the game is off she's subjected to days and weeks of complete darkness and silence (because time passes faster in the HSR universe, they have like day and night faster) when in reality it's only hours.

When the game is on she's finally greeted by the warmth again, she can watch fellow companions fight and although she's confused by your motives she knows you're trying to help. You helped Trailblazer prepare a memorial for her, and she watches as the Astral Express ventures into Penacony and faces foe after foe.

More than that, she can see you as you tear up over a character's story. She can hear your voice making jokes at the funny little references in the Trailblazer's words, references which she doesn't understand. And when Misha and Gallagher seem to die, Tingyun isn't the only one who's crying.

But Misha and Gallagher join her. They wake up while you're still playing the game and watch as you fulfill their goals. They see tears fall down your cheeks, and hear you as you cheer on the Astral Express and empathize with Sunday although never fully support him.

Then rather than turning the game off and subjecting them to darkness you go and do your weekly simulated universe, an affair Tingyun is quite used to at this point. She takes the time to explain the situation to Gallagher and Misha.

It's a bit harder for Misha to take than Gallagher, after all "Gallagher" had never been real he was always a character. But now in a sense he was. Gallagher would always exist, after all he was part of the game. When you turn the game off and the world goes dark, Tingyun is pleasantly surprised by the fact she isn't alone.

Those times of loneliness had passed. It's still scary, she's unable to see Gallagher or Misha or even herself, at times the void is all consuming even in sound and she can't hear them. But they're there, and that makes the whole ordeal less frightening.

They aren't sure what to make of you, the player. Yes you play the game, but to keep them here are you something like a God? They learn that in your world you are just an ordinary person but in their world you would be a God. The power you held over them, you spent making them stronger and providing them a sanctuary for once they died. You will a merciful God, indeed.

They found as they explored the void it wasn't much of a void at all. The character's, light cones, consumables, and relics you weren't using were hidden away in corners of the voids. Gallagher took some of the drinks you'd been keeping and the three of them took a celebratory toast.

When they'd initially come across the characters you weren't using it'd been terrifying. They stood eerily still, standing there, akin to robots. Tingyun noticed there was one that looked like her, she was sure you'd used it in combat. There was one for all of them, even the Trailblazer.

Tingyun, before Phantylia had taken her over completely, did notice suddenly getting faster but to think it was because of relics and a light cone you'd given a robot of her? It seemed to an extent properties were shared between them.

They were able to make a home based off of the items in your inventory, home was a strong word considering it was just a place to stay when you were offline. It was much better when you were playing the game, but they understood it wasn't like it was the only thing you could do. It was just a game.

Misha was the first one who suggested it. The idea of going to your world. It was just a game, they couldn't confine you to it, and even if you managed to travel inside of the game they were all dead anyway. Misha was excited at the idea, despite having all of the memories of Mikhail back he had never really gone on a trailblazing adventure himself.

Gallagher was the most skeptical of the three, wondering if they'd ever be able to exist in your world. But the fact they had consciousness despite being in a game, meant that maybe there was more to this than they thought.

At times they would wish to be by your side not just for their own selfish desires but to comfort you. When they first saw you cry, not for their sake, but for your own life it became a bit hectic. Misha was trying to yell against the sky for you to hear his voice. Gallagher accepted trying to get to your world and was trying to communicate to you through the inventory. And Tingyun was synthesizing consumables with the ingredients you had as if she was someone making food for a crying loved one.

There was very little they could do.

In a brief moment of exasperation, for their inability to talk to you, Gallagher mentioned that he wished a genius would die next so that way they could figure out how to travel to you. But for now, they had to work with what they have.

Another thing, this AU, compared to a Self Aware AU where they can still live their lives I feel as a higher potential of generating Yanderes. I'm not going to write them as that but it's just something I'm realizing because, they're basically completely alone aside from you, you bring light, you bring happiness, it would likely cause an unhealthy relationship.

Counter idea, what if characters that died are the only self aware ones? Hmmmm

Also imagine if characters that died but didn't really die like Blade and Firefly weren't able to make it to this afterlife but they could still feel your presence. Even death in the dreamscape allows them to feel your presence although only for a moment.

I feel like Blade especially would cling onto your presence, since for a brief moment he feels no pain, he doesn't feel mara struck, and-- to an extent he hates it but he feels like Yingxing. He can hear your voice from time to time, a reminder of the relief of pain, and when he met Trailblazer something about them reminded him of you. He wasn't sure what.

Note: I haven't even finished 2.2 but I got to the part where Misha and Gallgher seem to go bye-bye maybe they actually don't and pull a surprise bitch but I'm guessing they do. So I wrote this because I was thinking (bad idea I know)

Also Tingyun's death isn't 100% confirmed it's implied but I'm just assuming she's dead in this.

I swear this is one of my most cracked ideas yet

#hsr #reader insert #gn reader #gallagher #misha #blade #tingyun #self aware hsr #sahsrau

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riddles-n-games · 1 day

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Can you please make absolutely soul crushing Jameson Avery angsty hcs? Thanks

Okay, you asked for this. If you aren't ready, I was even less.

Jameson held Avery's hand often when he visited her after the plane accident. There were times where the dark intrusive doubtful thoughts got really bad, taunting him that she wouldn't wake up, her condition would get worse, that she would die in the end. Holding her hand was one of the only things that grounded him in those moments.

One time, in the middle of the night, after the fight with Gray, he start literally getting a panic attack and actually cries, thinking something happened to her after he woke up.

Sometimes he would lean over her to press his ear against her chest to hear her heartbeat because he wasn't convinced that the sounds he was hearing coming from the machine were real.

Some months after they get together, Avery tells Jameson what truly happened during the encounter with Sheffield as even though she did tell him a lot after the coin toss, sealing their relationship, she wasn't quite ready to process the trauma aloud yet.

Jameson gets very angry at the news and gets fiercely protective of her which shocks Avery. It affects him so deeply that several nights, he can't sleep at all; nightmares are catching him, setting in a new bout of insomnia for a while but he can't bring himself to leave bed so he just holds her tight.

He helps her start self-defense classes and practices with her every day, teaching her different martial arts and kickboxing techniques. It helps keep him calm and to redirect his thoughts to something productive, knowing he's proactively helping his girl.

During the final months of Jameson's senior year, he and Avery spend more time together at school, however rumors arise. A lot of them turn the tables against him; that he's dating her to get his family's money back, because he wants to tap that, a last hoorah before he leaves for his gap year, that he's going to use her to get into a prestigious college even though he's basically done nothing to become acclaimed for himself, and so the list goes on. But the worst one is that he's going to get her killed because his last girlfriend did. That one actually penetrates.

Avery notices that he's been more quiet than usual despite his attempts to remain unaffected. At first, he's reluctant to talk about it but after a while he asks her if she truly believes that he's going to get her killed.

She is shocked by this as she truly thought he was handling the rumors and accusations pretty well and they weren't bothering him. Then, she vehemently says that she doesn't believe it for a single second and reminds him that if she truly had those kinds of doubts, she would have never been with him in the first place. And her honesty helps him cope.

This gives Avery a rare glimpse into his vulnerability regarding such topics and appreciates his rawness to just admit it especially after holding it in for a while.

Post graduation and into the start of the summer, the anniversary of Hannah's death is coming up. Avery is as a result getting a bit restless and anxious about it. She closes up and Jameson knows something is up. He tries giving her space but realizes she seems even more down and goes to Libby for comfort instead. So, Jameson decides to ask her sister what's happening and Libby explains.

He decides to tell Avery he knows what's coming up, why she's like this and that if and only if she wants to, that she can talk to him if she pleases. Avery nods and for a few days, she continues being withdrawn but then she talks about the struggles, the late nights, her ear pressed up against the door when the doctor was talking to her mother, the failed chemo, the fact it was a late stage tumor. Everything. And halfway through, Avery breaks down sobbing. She is inconsolable.

Jameson can hear her soul weeping. He knows that she hasn't likely truly processed the grief in so long and this is her truly letting herself be open with him and herself. After this encounter, Jameson comes up with their code Tahiti and it was first it was more so used during really bad quiet periods for each one but then they became better at using it when they know the other is likely too emotionally constipated.

Hope this suffices in soul crushing? 😵‍💫

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justsomeguycore · 10 months

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ya boy is so brave i woke myself up via lucid dreaming out of a three level nightmare

#level three: the worst party i’ve ever been to #my lucid dream test is when i’m having a crisis in a dream and my brain can only think this makes no sense i must be dreaming #i see if i can turn the lights on/off with just looking at the light switch #so i did and got so excited and like basically threw myself around the room trying to wake up #level two: i wake up so happy that that nightmare was not real #except then everyone tells me it did happen and i basically have woken myself up after sleeping after that party #some more stuff happens i’m like no this makes no sense am i still fucking dreaming??#so i wake myself up into….#level one: i wake up and try to stumble out for confirmation that this is indeed real life #someone starts whispering ‘platypus pancakes’#i’m like WHAt ????#they’re like ‘platypus pancakes’#i’m about to just start crying i want things to make sense again so bad #then i wake up for real. and make this post #phew!

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sergle · 8 months

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When ppl will create a "curvy" girl character and get pretty much the whole body's proportions right, obviously they're putting emphasis on bust/hips but it seems like it's being executed well--- except that they completely, fully, and deliberately, skip the stomach entirely. Just nothin there. Not even a whisper. I'm like. Just sack up, make it make sense and be honest with yourself by making it official and say it's canon that they got a tummy tuck. You cowardly ass, yellow bellied, wet brained, upside-down dog mouthed dirty bitch.

#it'll look so uncanny bc it'll be like oh this more or less looks like it could be a body type I've seen on a real pers--- oh wait #you TOTALLY flattened the stomach for like no goddamn reason and you still want points for making her curvy. pass.#if ppl clown on this post I will not hesitate to turn off rbs and call a bomb threat to your house #sergle.txt #do you know what I mean though. like actually #you want EVERY aspect of a body type that does in fact. exist. very commonly actually. in the proportions you want #you want it all but you are so allergic to ANY substance on the stomach. so what now.#anything but the stomach. literally impossible to draw apparently #I'll be like ah maybe it's obscured with the clothing or pose but I see other art and I'm like oh no nvm it's on purpy.#''why does it have to be a plausible body type'' why put in any effort at all. why draw. why depict women ever. why wake up in the morning #nut up or shut up.

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wrinkleintime · 7 months

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enterprise text posts: featuring t'pol my beloved <3

+ BONUS

was a toss up on which screencap to use for girls night! so you get BOTH. ft. archer hanging with the girlies in the labyrinthine catacombs beneath the city <3

#i too wake up everyday saying SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME and then i go to work :)#and how am i expected to act normal when theres literally sounds!!!!!!!!!!!!! she is asking the real questions!!!!!!!!!!!!!#star trek #star trek enterprise #t'pol #enterprise text posts #mine #the way archer is looking into the camera in the he's not my boyfriend one cracks me up. he's really just some guy t'pol drags around.#anyway this whole set was so fun ive been making these like one at a time for months and have finally accumulated enough for a full post <3

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onehundredfallenpetals · 9 months

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A change of trains, an unexpected companion on the way home

#persona 5 #persona 5 royal #shuake #akeshu #amamiya ren #p5 joker #goro akechi #akechi goro #persona 5 protagonist #p5r #kurusu akira #akira kurusu #I am late on my posting schedule again!! Sorry!! My brain is wanting me to do studies but if I do studies I don't finish the piece on time #but if I don't do studies I also don't finish the piece in time because my stupid brain and ability to analyse is telling me I can improve #Also real glad I added the silhouette person in there #makes the train feel like there are more people than just shuake on board #Story for this one is Akechi catching up with Akira when he has to change trains + wait a bit for the next train to come #He gets on the same train as Akira and looks for him in the train cars #Akira has already fallen asleep cause he's been on a train for hours so Akechi wormed his way in #and is shushing Mona to not wake him so he can surprise Akira when he wakes up at his stop at home!#Also took Akira's glasses off for him so he's not sleeping in them

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heartorbit · 11 months

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a wahoo girl in a wahoo world

#emu otori #project sekai #pjsk #prsk #ignore the tone of the ena i posted the other day. this s emu territory. Kyaa with me. Shalalalaaa #court mandated emu #the court in question? ME...!#birthday mandated emu actually #i havent open splat3 in literally a month sorry LAWLLLLL #My cringeflop cat is cuddled up to my side with her belly up and its taking all of my willpower #not to shove my hand into her belly because itll make her mad as fuuuck and she'll wake up #BUT SHES SOOOO CUTE. ok goodnight ^_^#OOH MY GOD MY TABLET PEN THAT I BROKE OPEN AND MELTED BACK THE WIRES TOGETHER ON ISNDOING ITS THING AGAIN #it wont recognize the pen skmetimes. UHGGGG SOLDERING IT WAS A PAIN IN THE ASSSSS I HAD TO DO IT WITH A SCREWDRIVER AND A CANDLE. FAWK OFF #huion FAAACK you and your tablet pens that break at a stiff gust of wind. I know i got this like 6 years ago but still. IT SHOULD WORK #this is so lazy injust wanted to try 800 brushes and draw emu ok. I CAN DO WHATI WANT!!#ok thats all my grievances goodnight for real #emu my scp creature very very true

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theshadowrealmitself · 2 months

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Once again thinking about Human who was adopted by a Vulcan/Romulan couple, my current thoughts about it:

The Vulcan parent: Seems controlling and strict to outsiders, has everything of the Human’s life planned out, wanted them to have an arranged marriage even tho Humans don’t go through pon farr

Meanwhile, in reality, that’s their solution to handling the Human’s anxiety (cause y’all just know this is another traumatized oc), the idea is that if they plan everything out for them in advance then there’s nothing for them to be anxious about, and if they arrange a marriage then they know that their kid isn’t gonna end up with a creep (found dramas and stuff while researching Human culture for their child)

The Romulan parent: Seems more laidback to outsiders, was against an arranged marriage and any other life planning for their Human kid, comes across like they just really support choosing your own destiny, but that’s actually their theory on handling the Human’s anxiety, they think if the Human keeps getting pushed to do more and more stuff, then they’ll “see there’s nothing to be anxious about” and it’ll help them long term, wants their kid to be able to handle themself in case anything happens to their parents

The Human: A young adult by now who gives off no indication on having been raised by a Vulcan and a Romulan if you aren’t paying close attention, more anxious than the average person, benefits from both parents’ interference (some stuff is good to avoid and some stuff does get better if you go out and do it)

#star trek #humans #Romulans #Vulcans #real quick post before I pass out because I will wake up and forget to make this if I don’t #there’s just something funny to me about two alien parents and they’re almost normal by human standards Human kid #balanced each other out pretty well good job

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nientedal · 6 months

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Usually I just save stuff like this to my drafts until I calm down but you know what, fuck it, I'm done.

Any so-called leftist who refuses to recognize that our options right now are "genocide abroad, progress at home" and "genocide abroad AND genocide at home" and that there is a significant difference between those two options is cordially invited to eat shit and die. We do not have time to entertain your anti-voting hopeless nonsense. A future in which we are able to move towards less death will always be preferable to the one in which we can't, and if you smug, sneering little clowns sacrifice that future on the altar of your own self-righteousness because you're too high on your own farts to realize how far up your own ass you are, I genuinely hope you fucking drown. Specifically, I hope you drown in the blood of the people who will die all over the world as a result of your bizarre refusal to work towards a future that doesn't include ethnic cleansing.

This is the United States. We sell war, here. I don't know how so many of you are only just now figuring that out, but you better get over your shock like yesterday because we are out of fucking time. We ran out of time when Reagan took office if not long before. You think not voting will improve any of this?

Keep calling, keep writing, keep screaming. Governments everywhere are (slowly) beginning to listen. Democrats are (slowly) beginning to listen. But Republicans never will, and if they seize power again next year (which they will absolutely do their damned to attempt), everything will be so, so much worse for everyone, everywhere. The work is slow and painful and imperfect but it will only get done if we show up and do the work, so keep calling, keep writing, keep screaming-- and when the time comes, you show up and vote for the future that lets us build a better tomorrow instead of just choking to death in the steaming shitpile of today.

#''i can't have No Genocide tomorrow!!! so i don't want No Genocide at all!!! WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH'' that's you. that's how you sound #''if i can't have perfect then don't even fucking bother with better!! just give me worse instead!!'' are you for fucking real #you don't care about Palestine you don't care about anything other than being able to go ''Well. at least I didn't choose this.''#not choosing is still a choice! you stupid motherfucker!#choosing to stand at the lever and do nothing and watch the trolley crush five people is still a choice!!#how DARE you act like that blood is not on your hands!#again: THIS IS THE UNITED STATES. WE SELL WAR HERE.#not voting for Biden is not going to help Palestine!#in fact it will absolutely measurably make the situation WORSE!#for them AND everyone else!#this is the reality we are working with and if you want it to change then you HAVE to play the long game!#leftists heard ''don't let perfect be the enemy of good'' and went ''WHAT THE *FUCK* DO YOU MEAN I CAN'T HAVE PERFECT??! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA''#and i have fucking had it!#all i can do is try to keep working towards a day when the current left is the farthest right we have #but we are never gonna get there if y'all don't wake the fuck up and get moving #us politics #vent post #so help me god if this turns into a game of Spot the Tankie in the notes i'm gonna start knifing people

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camels-pen · 6 months

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consider sanuso bodyswap where Sanji is of course "admiring" Usopp's body and Usopp is trying desperately to keep himself from getting worked up so that he doesn't light himself on fire.

Luffy and Chopper are not helping. They are in fact doing the opposite of helping. They've ramped up their pranks and are doing anything possible to get Usopp angry so that he combusts, freaks out, and then dives into the ocean to put himself out. They think it's hilarious.

Nami and Brook are Also not helping, since they're conspiring with Sanji to put on a fashion show with Usopp's body. Sanji called it "not wasting a precious opportunity to get him in something other than overalls". Usopp called it mutiny and he was gonna- dive into the ocean, holy fuck Sanji why is it so easy to catch fire?!

Best part about this is that Sanji assured him, several times, that his body doesn't get hurt by catching fire. Usopp still jumps into the ocean every time.

Robin pipes up at one point, asking if Sanji was immune to just his own flames or all flames. Sanji just kind of shrugs and said it depends. Franky, having just been leisurely watching all of this gets an idea. Would his Franky Fireball hurt Sanji's body or just give him more fire to work with?

He tries to coax Usopp into agreeing to test it out and, somehow, he manages it. Albeit, Usopp is all knocking knees and chattering teeth, a very odd sight from 'Sanji'. As part of the deal though, he can only shoot a fireball the size of his hand.

Usopp meant his small hand. The one Franky used for tinkering and fine detail work. He did not, however, clarify this.

So, when a fireball the size of Franky's big hand comes out, well. Usopp runs for his goddamn life.

It takes him a few moments- and the voices of his friends sounding distant and below him- to realize he hadn't, in fact, run to the men's quarters, but rather into the fucking sky.

And oooooh, boy he is gonna kill Sanji one of these days. Why was his body's first fucking instinct when running to go up, what the actual HELL-

Usopp lit himself on fire again.

He curses out Sanji as his Sky Walk fails in the same moment and he plummets towards the deck.

#one piece #sanuso #nemotime #usopp the first time he lights himself on fire: WHAT THE FUCK WHAY THE FUCK WHAT THE HELL OH GOD OH F-#oh ndvdggdvdv okay listen. listen. omagine Zoro's been asleep this whole time. and he misses the memo that there was a bodyswap.#and he wakes up to 'Sanji' kicking him abd immediately goes into fight mode... and then is really fucking spooked #bc 'Sanji' is blubbering about Zoro going to kill him and that he couldnt die this young and Zoro's just. Still as a statue.#Literally cannot compute.#and then 'Usopp' comes up to him. threatening him and calling him names the way he was expecting from 'Sanji'#Brook: oh dear he mustve slept through all the commotion. Zoro-san! Usopp and-!#Nami covering Brook's mouth: No wait i smell a money making opportunity #shes gonna con him. idk how or with what yet but shes definitely gonna con him #hes gonna be sooo pissed when he finds out she conned him but his usual outlet for physical violence is currently indisposed so. lol. lmao.#i like making zoro suffer idk why its just funny #wait wai what if Usopp didnt trip on him what if when he plummets to the deck he lands on Zoro lmfao #also Franky's standing there like 'Why did you dodge it?!' and Usopp is right back to trying not to light himself on fire again lol #oh n Jinbei gets roped into the fashion show stuff #where he incurs 'newbie's first debt to Nami'#damn now im thinking about him slightly concerned about all this spontaneous combustion and then Robin saying something to make it worse lol #ANYWAY MORE IMPORTANTLY the real tragedy of this post is that because Usopp's constantly worried about Combusting #it never really sinks in how blatantly Sanji is checking out his body + enjoying doing that fashion show #and because of Sanji 'enjoying the view' he never notices the brief moments where Usopp quietly does the same #before being interrupted by Luffy and Chopper coming out of nowhere wanting to roast marshmallows on Usopp's leg #okay im done were done im good its bed time gnight gmorning gday to all

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