#there are not really spoilers but kinda? just vague things for you to fill holes in yourself if you play the game

[skellebonez]

14. With a possessed monkie kid? (Doesn't have to be my au, i just crave possession stuff rn fbsbfb)

Oh you gave me so much power. I have too much power. I had to write this ASAP before Friday, I did not want the idea I had to be tempered by what happens in the finale. Since this is supposed to be set a couple weeks after what could possibly happen. Spoilers if you haven’t read the summary for S2E10.

This may not be in your Possession AU, but it takes a little inspiration from it because I love it!

Warning: vaguely described injuries, blood. Reminder that I think Macaque can be severely hurt but is immortal to the point he can heal any injury.

Am I scaring you?

“Hey- don’t scream it’s just me- You guys seen MK around?”

Despite Macaque’s request, Pigsy and Tang continued to scream. It wasn’t surprising, really. It wasn’t every day that an enemy your friend/person you see as a son just revealed to you a couple weeks earlier had attacked him twice in ways that had left him pretty messed up and questioning his choices and abilities just pops their body from the shoulders up out of the shadows on your wall without warning. Doubly so when very shortly after learning all this that person does a heel face turn and joins your side without technically joining it against everyone’s will and is still kind of an asshole.

The immortal monkey needed to work on that last bit. Maybe he could upgrade from “asshole” to “jerk face” in the eyes of Team MK if he brought drinks. He didn’t really care though, he just wanted to make his own life easier. At least Wukong had been... somewhat open to letting him stick around, given MK convinced them to talk when they were too exhausted after the giant mech battle to actually fight each other, and that made their joint training sessions with MK much easier. That still took getting used to.

"Has MK been acting... off to you lately?" Macaque asked after Tang and Pigsy stopped screaming and levied him with unhappy glowers at the intrusion. One more note to add on the ‘things he should probably stop doing if people want to not hate him’ list, announcing himself better. "I know I'm kinda knew to this whole ‘technically not being a bad guy and caring a bit about other people’ thing and all but he seems..."

‘Not being a bad guy’. Nailed it.

"Dead inside?" Tang deadpanned. "Yeah, we kinda noticed."

“A little more blunt than I was gonna put it but yeah,” Macaque stepped out of the shadows fully, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly as Pigsy grabbed a wooden spoon and held it. A warning that he would not hesitate to chuck it at him at the first excuse he needed. “He’s been acting odd around both me and Wukong. Which, you know, given everything that happened I get it, but he hasn’t come to his last three training sessions at all.”

This, unlike everything else he had said, seemed to make the two men pause.

“What do you mean?” Tang asked, pushing his glasses up and looking at him oddly. “He’s been leaving for those on time like normal.”

“Ah, well, you see,” Macaque chose his next few words carefully. Being honest, truly honest without theatrics or planning in advance to help him, was a new undertaking for him so he stumbled through it. “The first time it happened Wukong astral projected to him and they talked and he seemed ok enough, like he just needed a break. The next time it happened I kinda... followed him? Just to make sure he was ok, no evil shadow business! He just kinda wandered downtown the entire time, looking like he was lost without being lost. If that makes sense. But yesterday he did the same thing so I did the same thing and I found him just kinda... sitting in front of the entrance to DBK’s old hideout?”

Instead of making the two men more concerned, this seemed to make them both deflate.

“Yeah...” Pigsy said softly, lowering the spoon just a bit. “He’s been doing that. We, uh... we had Mei follow him a couple times on deliveries because he was acting off. He did the sitting thing a few days ago too, just while he was on break or if he finished his deliveries early. He’s been doing that a lot lately, like he wants to get things done fast so he can do whatever he’s doing.”

“But he isn’t even doing anything!” Tang said, gripping his hair with one hand. “It’s like he’s just... sitting? Like he just wants to be alone maybe? Sandy’s been talking to him, trying to help him with the cats and everything, but he thinks he needs to see his therapist instead... I think he’s right.”

Macaque frowned for a second before forcing a wide smile on his face. “I thought so. I think Sandy may have the right idea too, you should talk to him. OK BYE-E!”

Before the two men could react he fell backward into the shadows and dissipated. He had somewhere to be.

~

Just sitting... no. Macaque was sure of it now as he watched MK sitting in front of the hole that still had not been filled since DBK had left the Flaming Foundry, cloaked in shadow behind littered debris. His conversation with the Monkie Kid’s elders confirmed the immortal’s suspicions.

MK was waiting for something.

And that meant something was deeply wrong.

He hadn’t lied to the duo in the noodle shop, but he hadn’t told them the full truth either. Macaque had been following MK for the last week, already knew about Mei himself, partly out of curiosity at first but also out of Wukong’s own insistence. He was worried for his successor and knew that Macaque could keep a quieter eye on him than he ever could, and Wukong... Wukong and MK, despite their renewed training, were not on the best of terms right then. Not after he learned what the vacation really was, not after he learned that his mentor knew about the White Bone Spirit the entire time. They were still close! Closer than MK was to Macaque when he trained him at least, just. Strained.

Watching his two teachers finally talk for once and work out what actually happened all those centuries ago, showing that Wukong wasn’t just an unflappable hero but a person who made mistakes and had worked to better himself and would continue to do so because he was a person, probably softened that a bit. He was still upset but much less so in the week after the defeat... but this last week it was like all that had been undone too quickly. It started slowly, but after four days it was like they were back to the day he learned the truth but so much worse.

For the last three days MK was so quiet, reserved, completely unlike the loud and excited guy Macaque knew and like he just wanted to be left alone to sit and not interact with anyone. Tang said he was acting like he was “dead inside”.

That... wasn’t an entirely incorrect descriptor. It was like he was hollow and just going about the motions. Or like he had closed off everything inside of himself for some reason.

Wukong was terrified. He’d been talking to MK every day he didn’t come to the island to train via astral projection, and Macaque had just watched another conversation between the two end half an hour earlier. Macaque tried the same thing but didn’t get nearly as far as Wukong had been, and talking to him like this seemed to make him less likely to just up and leave (the few times Wukong had just come to MK instead made it clear how uncomfortable he had been, ending the conversations with a quick jump from the staff before Wukong could convince him to stay, so they decided to go with what made him more comfortable to find out what was happening).

So that was how they operated. Macaque watched MK. Made sure he was at least physically ok. Wukong talked to MK, didn’t force him to come to the island and wouldn’t show up unannounced. But despite them communicating more than they ever had it was like he was telling Wukong less than he ever had before. The one thing they didn’t tell him was what Macaque was doing.

“Am I scaring you?” MK suddenly said, loud enough for only Macaque to hear. His tone was... wrong. “You’re not nearly as sneaky as you think you are, Six-Ear.”

“What?” Macaque shot up and out of the shadows, eyes wide. MK had never called him that before.

The man before him stood, back to him and headband and coat oddly still in the blowing wind.

And then he jumped.

“MK!” Macaque reacted without thinking, diving down the hole after his Wukong’s student. He knew that he would be just fine, he could handle being thrown into a mountain so he could handle jumping down a giant hole, but the sight was too sudden and horrific for him to remember that at the moment.

Except he wasn’t there. When Macaque landed, the crash of his boots hitting the rocky ground echoing through the artificial cavern, he was alone.

Something was even more deeply wrong than he could have ever imagined.

“MK! Kid! Kiddo!?” He called out, all six of his ears out to catch any hint of movement. “Come on, you told me off for calling you Kiddo just last week, get angry at me so I know you’re ok! Tell me you’re a Monkey Man or something!” Macaque tried to keep his tone light, words lighter with an awkward laugh at the end of his sentences, but it only served to make the sinking feeling in his stomach worse. The opposite effect he wanted to accomplish. “Say something damn it!”

Silence. Everything was... silent. The only thing Macaque could hear was his own breathing, his own heartbeat, the rushing of blood in his ears... but nothing else.

Then a laugh. Low and soft and wrong and Macaque’s eyes widened as he realized his mistake.

He knew that laugh.

He also knew the feeling of the staff. He felt it during their first battle, when MK pulled every ounce of lingering power to defeat him. He felt it during that climactic encounter with Wukong, when his eye was damaged beyond repair.

He felt it now, as it jutted through his stomach without warning. Covered in blood.

Huh... that was kind of new, actually. He hadn’t felt a new sensation like that in so long.

The staff was pulled back and out of him quickly, driving him to his feet as he held the new wound and listened and nearly imperceptible footsteps made their way around him. How had he not heard... no. No he knew now. Now it was obvious what had happened.

Why did his wound burn like that? Why couldn’t he stand? He should be able to move, he wasn’t this weak!

“He beat you,” He groaned out, coughing as he tried to stay upright on his knees. “You should be-”

“Dead?” MK asked, voice his own but tone completely different. The black on his shoes were blue. As Macaque looked up he could see most of the color on his outfit had faded to white with blue accents. His eyes, the only think about him physically to be different, a brilliant blue to match. His headband was gone from around his head, instead used to help slick his hair back and out of his face. “How can you kill what already isn’t alive? No, I just waited in this body until I was able to influence him enough to make him... compliant. Much easier that way, actually.”

Either his vision went fuzzy or the world around them did, MK moving closer at a speed that shouldn’t be possible. His hands were grasping Macaque’s scarf tightly... this felt far too familiar.

“If you had been the dragon girl or anyone else I might have just killed you, you know,” MK’s voice said as he tilted his head to the side, an almost playful smile on his face. “But this is much more fun, and preferable. You can relay the message for me, once the poison I coated the staff in wears off and you heal anyway.”

Macaque was dropped unceremoniously onto his back, letting out an agonized yelp as he hit the ground. MK stomped on his wound, earning another scream.

“By then myself and this body will be long gone,” MK chuckled, stepping over Macaque completely to walk further into the foundry. “I must thank you, you played into my hands so much better than I ever planned on. Getting you all to work together to ‘beat me’ was just far too easy.” He stopped, turning to smirk at the immortal shuddering on the ground.

“I haven’t had a body this powerful in centuries,” the White Bone Spirit said with a laugh before vanishing in a fuzz of his vision and a wisp of cold air.

#monkie kid #lego monkie kid #gen fic #hurt no comfort #warning: described injuries #mk #qi xiaotian #six eared macaque #Pigsy #tang #white bone spirit #lady bone demon #FILLER TAG FILLER TAG FILLER TAG #macaque will live but fuck he is going to be feeling that for a while #warning: impalement

[ahwait-no-yes]

“Beautiful”

TW// ED?? Ish?? Just my experience and im not gonna self diagnose

(Read at your own risk!! I’d hate to trigger anyone hh)

i am looking away as i project instead of talk to people about it 

(Also Kaito and Kokichi are brothers but Ouma was adopted and uses his last name because he feels it’s still a part of him and yes they’re fine with it and yes he loves his parents and they love him) also me getting worse? more likely than you think —

= 

There’s a bit of progress.

Shuichi pushed his hand against his stomach, trying to flatten it as much as possible. He remembered reading somewhere that your lower stomach would never be perfectly flat, seeing as you had your intestines that were taller than you in there.

You probably can if you try hard enough.

Shuichi grimaced once he looked at his face, running his hand through his hair. When was the last time he showered? He probably should. He cupped his face, gently squishing his cheeks. His face looked slimmer than before.

This is good. This is progress. We won’t go too far, we just wanna loose a few pounds. There’s nothing wrong with that.

He softly smiled at his reflection, ignoring the slight shaking in his hands. He didn’t want to go too far. He heard that not eating can cause hair loss. He didn’t want that to happen, so he wouldn’t go to far.

You’re doing good. This is good.

Shuichi laid back down, gently rubbing his forehead. Were his hands always this shakey?

Probably. It’s nothing to worry about, you can still write and draw fine if you need to.

He frowned at the familiar feeling of discomfort, yet his stomach didn’t growl. Maybe his body was just adjusting. He remembered reading somewhere that not eating just makes you gain more weight.

Which, probably wasn’t true. You look skinnier when you don’t eat.

He pulled out his phone, typing a question into google.

How many calories should 18 year old boy eat?

2,400

He thought about it. He definitely didn’t eat that many. A hot pocket and instant ramen. How much was that? 

Hot pocket is 600 calories.

He looked it up.

371 calories.

Yeah, he’ll be fine. He feels fine. Shuichi looked at himself in the mirror, feeling panic wash over him. He didn’t look skinnier. Had he gained weight? He hadn’t weighed himself in a while. It was possible. He only ate two things. That wasn’t a lot.

Except that slice of cake was a lot.

Shuichi laid back down, curling up in a ball. He wrapped his fingers around his wrist. They could still touch. He sat back up, ignoring how he felt dizzy and how his vision darkened for a second. He pulled down his shirt collar, running his hand over his collar bone. It was more apparent now. Not all of his work had gone to waste. He wasn’t going to make himself throw up. He didn’t want to throw up and have to deal with the burning pain in his throat that would last for hours, or feel the lack of energy after it. When was the last time he drank water? He glanced at the half filled water bottle, grimacing. Water doesn’t have calories, but it would make his stomach more obvious. 

He wasn’t that thirsty anyway.

— 

Shuichi sat down with his friends, who were currently talking about getting together to study. He wasn’t really paying attention, his mind seemed a bit hazy. Not too much, luckily. When an ad of someone eating came up, he frowned.  It never made sense how people could just eat without worrying about what would happen. 

Maybe he was just a little scared of food. No big deal. The thought of eating just made him feel sick and scared.

“Hey, are you listening Shuichi?” Kaito suddenly asked, one of his eyebrows raised. Saihara sheepishly smiled, rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry, I spaced out. What were you saying?” “We all said that were gonna meet up this Saturday at 2 pm. Is that good?” Kaito asked, his usual confident smile on his face. “Yeah, I don’t have any plans,” Shuichi replied, tugging on a loose string. “Great! We’ll see you there!” —

This whole thing was a bad idea.

The five of them, consisting of Kaito, Kaede, Harukawa, and Ouma (including himself) were cramped into a small booth. Ouma kept throwing small bits of food at Kaito when he wasn’t looking, Kaede kept trying to stop Ouma, (though, he kept crying whenever she said anything about it) and Harukawa kept glaring at him from across the table. Shuichi didn’t have time to look over the food, (calories, really) so he just chose something that sounded good. It ended up being soup, which he was mostly fine with.

Mostly fine with.

Shuichi didn’t want to eat. He wasn’t hungry. He ate enough yesterday. “Hey, Saihara chan! You okay? You look like you swallowed a whole rock!” Kokichi chirped, an excited smile on his face. Shuichi just nodded, pulling at the loose hoodie he was wearing.

He’d be fine. It was just a bowl of soup. It’s not a big deal.

He just stirred the soup, trying to think of ways to quickly finish it.  The loud noise felt so overwhelming. He just wanted to leave. To go back home. “I’m gonna be right back,” Saihara abruptly stood up and left to the restroom. He just needed some time to think, to calm down. He quickly locked himself in a stall, leaning against the door. 

He felt so, so sick.

Saihara took a deep breath, rubbing his eyes. He was overreacting. If he didn’t eat, his friends would suspect something. He didn’t want to answer any questions about eating, so he’d have to eat. He shouldn’t be having to deal with this. He missed being able to eat and not think anything of it. He didn’t know when this started. It felt as if,

this,

had been going on for as long as he could remember. Shuichi rubbed away the tears that had managed to slip out. He shakily took a deep breath, (was it always this hard to do anything?) and opened the door. He didn’t say anything when he saw Ouma waiting at the entrance. “Heya Saihara chan!” Ouma walked up to the other, a soft smile on his face. “Uh, hey,” Saihara muttered, splashing his face with water. “Soo! You okay? You looked a tinyyy bit upset earlier!” “I’m fine, I just had a headache,” He murmured, the lie easily slipping off his tongue. It wasn’t exactly a lie, but not exactly the truth either. A half truth at the best. Kokichi hummed in acknowledgement. “So, are you gonna leave because of that nasty headache?” He asked innocently, tilting his head. Trying to find holes in his story. “Maybe, I don’t want it to get worse,” He replied. More lies, more half truths. Ouma just nodded, still staring at him. Shuichi finished washing his hands and quickly dried them off, shoving them into his pockets.

Was he always so cold?

“Well, uh, I’m gonna go home. Can you tell them why? I don’t wanna interrupt  them,” He looked away, fidgeting. Kokichi just nodded and placed his hands behind his head. “Sure thing Saihara chan!” — Shuichi was laying down, tears running down his face. Things were getting worse and worse, and he felt so helpless. He kept trying his best, sleepless nights studying and memorizing things he’d probably never have to use.

It didn’t matter anyway, it was never enough. He wasn’t enough.

Everything hurt. He hadn’t eaten for a while. He had two bites of egg, but it made him feel so nauseous and guilty he just threw the rest away when no body was looking. He was tired. He couldn’t sleep. He couldn’t do much other then watch the clock tick away, waiting for the day to be over.

A knock at the door.

Shuichi, of course, ignored it. He didn’t want to talk to anyone, and didn’t want to deal with his heart feeling it was going to beat out of his chest and his vision blacking out for a a few seconds.

Though, he had gotten used to it.

The knocking continued. Shuichi groaned and stood up, grabbing onto his dresser so he wouldn’t fall. His vision took longer to clear up, and he still felt dizzy. 

It’s just an inconvenience. Don’t worry about it.

He stumbled over to the door, taking a second to rub his head in hopes it would clear up the dizziness.

Spoiler alert, it didn’t work

. He opened the door, staring at Ouma grinning up at him. “Hey Saihara chan!  Fancy seeing you here!” He exclaimed, eyes shining in excitement. “I live here,” Shuichi deadpanned, quietly sighing. “I know!” Kokichi chirped, gently pushing past Shuichi and walking in the house. “Uh, Ouma kun, why exactly are you here?” He asked, closing the door and following him. “Oh, you know,” He very helpfully replied, a nonchalant expression on his face. “But hey! Since I’m here, why don’t we do something fun!” He abruptly said, spinning around to face the other boy. “I don’t know, I’m kinda busy,” He replied, avoiding eye contact. “Busy with what?” Kokichi asked, getting closer to his face. Saihara backed away, looking uneasy. “With stuff,” he vaguely replied. Ouma sighed, grabbing his hand, only to let go a second later. “God Shumai, why’re you so cold?” He asked, pouting. Shuichi just muttered something, messing with the loose sleeves of his hoodie. It was quiet for a few seconds. Kokichi kept staring at Shuichi, trying to figure *something* out. Saihara kept shifting in place, feeling more and more panicked as the seconds passed. “We can watch a movie then!” Ouma suddenly exclaimed, a soft smile on his face again. Shuichi just nodded, nervously smiling back. “Do you have popcorn?” He asked. Shuichi just mumbled, “Yeah, probably.” After a few minutes, they put on a random movie and had a bowl of popcorn sitting in between them. Kokichi offered some every now and then, only for Shuichi to say no everytime.

He could just grab some.

“I’m gonna be right back, you don’t have to pause it,” Shuichi muttered, standing up. He still felt a bit dizzy, and standing definitely didn’t help. Kokichi just nodded, eyes glued to the screen. Shuichi locked himself in the bathroom and took a deep breath. It used to be he was hungry but didn’t eat. But now, the smell and thought of food made him feel nauseous.

You could eat and make yourself throw up.

He grimaced. It wouldn’t be difficult, really. He could just stick two fingers into his mouth until he threw up. He could. It’d be easy. It’d be no big deal. He shakily sighed, covering his face. He didn’t like throwing up. It hurt, and it made it even harder to breathe. It was also just gross. 

But it might make things a but easier. You don’t have to force yourself to throw up, but you can try. Like drinking a lot of water.

.

Yeah, he could do that.

After a few laboured deep breaths, he left the bathroom and sat back down on the couch. Kokichi continued the movie (though, he didn’t have to pause it,) and smiled at him. Shuichi smiled back, wrapping the blanket around them.

Why did he feel so scared? So sad? It didn’t make sense, he was fine right now.

“You ok Saihara chan?” Kokichi quietly asked, still staring at the screen.

He’s really not. He’s not. He’s not ok. He needs to talk to someone. Something’s wrong.

“Yeah, it’s nothing,” He murmured, taking a deep breath. Ouma just nodded and gently grabbed his hand, just loose enough so he could pull away if he wanted. Saihara squeezed his hand, trying to ground himself. He was

fine.

Ouma squeezed back, a small smile on his face. 

Is it really a white lie if you don’t think it’s a big deal?

—————

Hm - DA ☄️✨

✧༺♥༻∞

yyeah ouch I wish I could him a hug,, the line “He couldn’t do much other then watch the clock tick away, waiting for the day to be over.“ hit me very hard so that’s what I based this end doodle on (-JJ)

#saiouma #oumasai #ouma kokichi #saihara shuichi #kokichi ouma #shuichi saihara #ouma #kokichi #saihara #shuuichi #au #dream anon #danganronpa #dr #ahwait-no-yes can't draw #ngl i kinda really like the doodle i did #sorry i know its been a couple days ive been trying my hardest ahaha #this chapter was quite unexpected but i love it #tw implied ED #ask to tag #submission

[hecksupremechips]

I’m gonna have a nerdy rant about video games please excuse me (zero escape spoilers)

K so my fave game series I’ve become obsessed with is zero escape, aka a weird bullshit series where the fandom is both small and dead as shit. Yay. And I just finished the last game, zero time dilemma. I wasn’t initially gonna play this game just cuz I heard it was kinda bad, but the ending to vlr had me curious. Plus it had Junpei in it and, well, I think he’s neat :)

But aaaaaaa

Yeah it was bad. Ill go over the good things though. I thought the escape rooms were like challenging without being toooo challenging. They were a good medium between the 999 and vlr puzzles. I liked them. I also really liked the D team a lot. Luna was one of my favorite vlr characters so it’s kinda natural I liked Diana a lot too. I also thought Sigma and Phi were really good in this game. I wasn’t to crazy about either of them in the second game but like. They’re cute in this game. And even though they’re "getting together" situation was kinda iffy, I think Sigma and Diana were cute together. The only valid het couple in this series. I’m kinda indifferent about the whole twist where Phi is their daughter. I don’t hate it, and I think it was cool how it was foreshadowed in vlr, but I think it makes some dynamics weird. Personally, I think Sigma and Phi would have a better siblings relationship but eh

Now let’s get into the bad, even though there’s so much that I physically cannot go over all of it. Idk where to even start. First off, the art style and designs had like no heart. Like everyone has interesting designs (one might even say too interesting) in the first two games. In ztd though, everyone was boring as shit. Junpei went from cool Marty McFly trans king to emo middle schooler. HE WAS LITERALLY IN JUST A BLACK SHIRT AND BLACK JEANS GOD. I’m gonna save him for later though. I’m just disappointed. Also the art style was bleh. I thought it looked nice on the cover, and I was also really excited cuz I read that there were "animated cutscenes". Y’all. Ugh. The cutscenes ended up being like the whole game. I was just watching it all go by and I couldn’t skip any dialogue without accidentally skipping important stuff. Not only that, there was no heart in it at all. I’d argue that the 3D models looked better in this game than in vlr (I’m personally not into how they changed to 3D but that’s a rant for another day), but the models in vlr had GREAT emotions! They had zero emotion in this game. I hated it. Thankfully the voice actors were able to add emotion but damn

Next is the characters. Needle to say, I didn’t enjoy most of them. I liked everyone on D team, the end. First of all, freaking Carlos. Talk about boring. Like god maybe I would’ve liked his design if he wasn’t wearing the button up and also maybe wore like any other pants aaaa. Also like hm. He uh, sure liked his sister. In a concerning way. Like it wasn’t a super obviously bad thing but every time romance was mentioned he’d be like "I don’t need romance, I have my sister!" Do you see what I mean? It’s sketchy to me.

Then we got Eric 👺👺👺. I hated this guy. First off he’s like a ripoff of Kristoph from frozen, without the fun himbo personality. And the whole time he was thirsting after Mira which ughhhh. They were worse than Junpei and Akane in 999. Maybe I’m just too gay for this shit but ughh. Also it was a thing that was pretty well established thing that his father was abusive but like. It didn’t really...mean jack shit? Honestly nothing about Eric’s character mattered, he was pretty irrelevant. Also he was super super shitty to Sean who was literally a fucking child

Then Mira. How disappointing aaaagh. Like they were literally just like "oh here’s this chick that has committed murder, this isn’t relevant at all :)". Like damn they really just had her be completely unnecessary huh. It was super obvious to me that she was the one who killed Eric’s mom and I thought that would’ve come up but. It just didn’t. I was also curious about their relationship in general since it seemed like she only got with Eric so she could kill him. And god they could’ve at least done something like idk. Make her like Dio and break into the game to cuz trouble. Or she could’ve been zero. Maybe that’s lazy but it would have been better. But no they literally did nothing with her. There was a timeline where she brutally murdered Junpei just like, for no reason I guess??? Jesus

Sean and Akane were characters I’m just meh about. I didn’t hate Sean, but I didn’t really like him either. Akane was never really my gal in 999 in the first place so hm. I think she’s funny but she’s done some sketchy stuff and idk I’d probably like her better if the games weren’t always trying to put her with Junpei every five minutes

Then there was Junpei. Ughhhh. They were trying something but ughh. He was very emo and kinda douchey and I just wasn’t into him. Which is a massive shame cuz I liked him a lot in 999, and especially in vlr. Like all I can say is that it’s a real disappointment for me

Now onto plot holes and things that didn’t get covered that should have. As previously mentioned, they didn’t do anything with Mira at all. They also didn’t properly go over Sigma and Diana’s relationship that Sigma had vaguely talked about that happened in another timeline. Carlos’s sister was not important at all and they threw in some "she’s got the mind abilities" bullshit in without really doing anything with it. The timeline shit made my brain turn into goo aaaa. We dont get closure on how the pandemic was stopped, which was the reason I played this fucking game. We didn’t learn jack shit about the third nonary game. And then of course, there’s fucking DELTA

This filled me with so much rage y’all. The game was just like "oh yeah btw there was this random old man who was just there the ENTIRE TIME that never got acknowledged ever and he’s the big bad villain of the game. Not just that, he’s the founder of the crazy cult from vlr. AND he’s Diana and Sigmas kid!" Like wow you know I don’t think words can describe how bad that was. I think things would’ve been better if he just like wasn’t there yeah. Also I guess he’s supposed to be like, the player cuz he mind controls the characters into making certain choices. Ugh. IT WAS SO STUPID MAN. And I guess the only ONLY reason he made the second nonary game was to make sure he was born which is just eghhhmm. That is too messy for me. That’s some bad time bullshit. And weird reason but okay. God

There’s literally so much more I have to say but if I don’t I’m gonna pass out so I’m just gonna take a nap and die. Moral of the story is that I’m pissed a series I loved ended so shitty and don’t play this game unless you hate yourself. The end

#dont look at me at all #i hate this shit so much i need to watch spongebob or something so i can recover from bad game #zero escape

[what-is-your-plan-today]

Stark Spangled Banner: Stab Me In The Front

Part 1: America’s Asshole 

Intro: It’s been a year since Katie was held hostage by Hydra, and whilst she’s still working through her feelings she has an idea about how she can make other people’s lives better as a result of her ordeal. Alongside this, she needs to take a trip to Boston to meet Harlan Thrombey-SIP’s latest author. Slightly nervous about taking a business trip alone after what happened last time, Steve offers to go with her.

What could possibly go wrong?

Warnings: Bad language. SMUT (NSWFW)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

Square Filled : “Mistaken Identity” @avengersbingo​ A/N: So, here we go. An Avengers/Knives Out Cross Over where Katie and Steve come face to face with America’s Asshole! The tongues are sharp and the knives are out! This is set in 2015 so way before the KO storyline so therefore contains no spoilers! You don’t need to have read SSM to understand or enjoy but please do so if you wish. 

Main Masterlist 

**Shout out to @icanfeelastormbrewing​ for being my Insult Partner when I was writing this!!**

PLEASE PLEASE REBLOG and COMMENT, This is probably my fave part of this fic I’ve written to date!! 

 October 2015

 “So, Mr Thrombey, that’s all confirmed.” Katie said, tapping at a key on her computer to lock the meeting in her calendar “11 am, Next Thursday, the 15th ”

“I’ll send you through the zip code and location for your GPS.” Harlan responded “The house is just outside of Lincoln, not far from Pierce Park. It shouldn’t be too far for you if you’re staying at the Harbor.”

“Thank you.” Katie smiled as she spoke into her phone, “I look forward to meeting you on Thursday Sir.”

“Oh, less of the Sir, Harlan please. And the pleasure is all mine Miss Stark…I mean, Mrs Rogers, my apologies!” The man chuckled “And thank you for accommodating my need to pull this meeting forward by a few days.”

“It’s not a problem.” she assured him. They exchanged pleasantries again and then she cut the call and leaned back in her chair, cracking her neck, before she double checked the travel arrangements. The hotel was booked, flight was sorted, hire care was confirmed. All that she needed to do was not forget the annotated manuscript or the cover ideas.

The door to her office opened and she looked up to see Tony leaning in the doorway, waving a Starbucks cup at her one of their familiar brown paper bags, clearly bearing treats.

“I love you bro…” she smiled at him as he wandered in, chuckling, placing the drink and paper bag down in front of her. She looked into the bag and gave a moan when she saw it was a rather large, gooey looking brownie, and gave a bigger moan when she sipped her drink and found it to be a Pumpkin Spiced Latte. “Perfect Elevenses!”

“Well thought you might need one, you’ve been locked in here since 7 this morning…”

“You got FRIDAY spying on me?” she narrowed her eyes at him.

“No.” he said at the same time the AI affirmed her suspicions.

“He has indeed had me watch you, Mrs Rogers.” “Traitor.” Tony rolled his eyes and Katie chuckled

“Well I had all this Harlan Thrombey stuff to sort, Steve’s still in Copenhagen with Sam chasing the alleged latest sighing of Bucky.” she shrugged “Not much point in lying in when you’re wide awake is there?”

“True.” Tony nodded. “Are you going back to the Compound tonight?”

“I dunno.” she shrugged “I might just stay here again if that’s ok?”

“Kiddo, you own part of this Tower, it’s always gonna be your home too.” Tony shrugged, “You can stay as long as you want.”

“Thanks Tone.” she smiled. She didn’t want to admit it, but she felt safer in the Tower whilst Steve was away, even thought it was ridiculous as the Compound was just as secure, being closer to her brother was a comfort.

“I haven’t forgotten what tomorrow is.” Tony said gently, looking at her.

“Funnily enough me neither.” she sighed “I should be celebrating, a year to the day Bucky broke me out of that fucking shit hole in Canada.” she pulled off her glasses, another remnant of her time with HYDRA. Since she’d been kept for 6 weeks in that horrific cell she’d needed glasses for anything that required a long period of concentration on a computer screen or monitor if she wanted to avoid migraines. Bruce seemed to think it was something to do with the fact that her cell had been painfully bright all the time and that continued exposure to artificial light in such a way triggered a subconscious response. 

She swallowed “I’ve been trying not to think about it.” she said gently.

“Which is why I booked you and Pepper into the Dominick for the afternoon.” he smiled at her “Well, Pepper has, I’ve just given her the credit card…full deep tissue massage, facial and then Franco’s booked to do your hair…and don’t bother telling me you’re busy as I had your diary cleared and everything reschedule to next week” he watched as she opened her mouth before shutting it,, shaking her head softly. “You leave in 30 minutes.”

“You spoil me.” she smiled softly. 

“Anything for my girls, plus I thought it might keep you busy whilst Spangles is otherwise engaged.”

“He was hoping to be back but when I spoke to him before he doesn’t know if he’s gonna be.” she shrugged “it is what it is.” Tony smiled at her before he stood up “Yes, it is. And this afternoon is your pamper time so get your shit together and meet Pepper downstairs.”

“Yes sir.” she said, saluting him with a grin.  

As with anything Pepper or Tony booked, the spa was off the scale. Katie had been meaning to go for ages, and now, as she sat in the chair in Franco’s salon she was already searching available dates to go back with Natasha and Wanda. She laughed and joked with the stylist and Pepper, the pair of them enjoying yet another bottle of champagne as they had their hair done. A couple of hours later, at just gone 7pm, Pepper dragged her out over the road and into a ridiculously expensive wine bar.

“Feeling better?” Pepper asked as Katie took a huge gulp of her Sancerre.

Katie smiled “Much, thank you.” “You know, I’m always here if you want to talk to someone other than Steve about stuff.” Pepper looked at her “And it won’t go any further.”

“That’s the thing, I don’t wanna talk about it…” Katie sighed “You know, Pep, I see all these women out there, read their testimonies and things and I just wonder how they’re so strong, like, how can they can just stand up and talk about what happened to them?” she trailed off, shaking her head “And me? I just wanna pretend it never happened. So much for being an Avenger huh?”

“Hey…” Pepper shook her head, looking at her sternly. “Stop that, right now.” “Well it’s true.” Katie shrugged “I mean, I’m a public figure right? But all people know is I was missing for 6 weeks, but it was put down to a mission gone awry. I just..well, I feel like I should be out there, trying to make a difference, helping people.”

“Kiddo, what you went through…” Pepper swallowed “I can’t even begin to imagine. And how you’ve dealt with and processed it, well, frankly I don’t know how you’ve been so strong. There is no shame in wanting to simply move on and leave it in the past.”

“I know.” Katie said softly “Thank you. Having everyone around me makes me realise how lucky I actually am. I’ve got a huge support network. Not everyone who goes through...” she swallowed, not quite able to say it “not everyone has that to fall back on.” Pepper pondered something before she looked at Katie, “You know, we haven’t picked our Partner Charity for the Stark Relief Fund next year…we could make it one that deals with Sexual violence. No need to go into details as to why.” Katie considered that for a moment, before she nodded “That’s not a bad idea.” she clicked her nails against her wine glass, thoughtfully “It would make a difference, right?”

Pepper nodded. “Absolutely. Give it some thought, see how you feel.” “I will, thanks.” she smiled. 

****

Steve was exhausted but wasn’t willing to spend another moment away from his wife. So the moment the jet was down he headed straight for the garage, jumped on his bike and roared out of the compound heading down town towards Manhattan.

“Good Evening Captain Rogers…” FRIDAY greeted him as he pressed his palm to the access pad at the rear entrance from the underground car park “Mrs Rogers is in your apartment.”

“Thanks FRIDAY.” he said, as the elevator began to rise. It stopped a few floors up, and when the doors flew open he was greeted by Tony who was undoing his tie.

“Oh, you’re back.” he said, looking at Steve appraisingly.

“You’re up late.” Steve looked at him.

“Just working on a few things.” Tony said vaguely. “How was the search for Tin Man?” “Well, it was him alright.” Steve said, running a hand down his tired face “Few more leads to work on. We could have stayed out there for a bit longer truth be told but, well, I wanted to be here tomorrow, you know.” Steve said, shrugging.

The two men shared a moment of understanding, both of them having experienced unsurmountable raw pain and anguish over the 6 weeks Katie had been missing and it wasn’t something they were likely to forget any time soon. If ever.

“She know you’re home?” Tony looked at him again. Steve shook his head.

“Wanted to surprise her.”

Tony smiled softly, “She’s probably asleep.  Her and Pep have been in the Spa all afternoon and they’ve drunk a lot so…”

Steve gave a huff of a laugh “Yeah she messaged me before saying you’d sent her there out for the afternoon. That was really thoughtful of you Tony.” “Well it happens occasionally.” Tony said as the elevator stopped at his floor. “Listen, Steve…”

Steve turned to face him.

“She’s not been herself the last few weeks.” Tony scratched at his beard and Steve took a deep breath.

“I know.” he said gently “I think she’s just, well, processing, if that’s the right word. We only got back from our honeymoon 3 weeks and it kinda hit her when we got back just what time of year it was. Whilst we were away she didn’t have time to think about it.”

“Just…well, take care of her for me ok?” Tony said, looking at the Soldier.

Steve nodded “Always Tony, you had my word on that when I told you I wanted to marry her, and I meant it.”

Tony nodded and clapped him on the shoulder, giving him a look of thanks before he left the elevator on the Part Floor level. It began to rise again and Steve let out a soft sigh. Tony was right, the last 2 weeks in particular Katie had been a little quiet, less vivacious, almost withdrawn even. At first he had put it down to post honeymoon blues but Natasha had pointed out that this time 12 months ago she had been at the mercy of Hydra, with those bastards brutalising her in ways that he couldn’t even bring himself to think about. For this reason, he’d been reticent to go on the latest mission but Katie had insisted, pointing out that they couldn’t not carry on with their lives and that she would be alright.

The fact she had basically moved back into the Tower for the 3 days he had been gone, however, made him think that she wasn’t quite as alright as she had told him.

The doors opened on their floor and he stepped out. It was mostly dark as he headed through to the bedroom where he found that the TV was playing on the wall, but Katie was fast asleep, one of the pillows clutched to her chest as a makeshift cuddle partner. With a soft smile he closed the door and headed over to the bed. Kicking off his boots he lay on his side, facing her, and brushed her soft hair back off her face before pressing a kiss to the bridge then tip of her nose and finally her lips.

She stirred, her face scrunching up in that adorable way it always did, before she blinked her eyes open. It took her a second to focus but when she did her lips curled upwards into a soft smile which became an ear to ear grin.

“Hey sweetheart.” he said softly, kissing her again, his hand cupping her face.

“You’re home.” she said, reaching up to lay her hand over his. “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming back?”

“Wanted to surprise you.” he smiled.

“Well it worked.”

“I missed you.” he said softly, his thumb caressing her cheekbone.

“Missed you more.” she shot back and he chuckled.

“Doubt it. How was the Spa?”

“Oh it was amazing.” she gushed, her eyes shining “I had this deep tissue massage and the guy hit spots on my back I didn’t even know I had. The facial was great, and my hair…”

“I like the colour.” he said smiling, gently moving his hand so he twirled a piece around his finger. The ends were slightly lighter than usual, almost a dark honey blonde, and it extended a little up the strands before evening out.

“It’s called ballayage.” she smiled at him. “I just fancied a bit of a change.”

“Looks good on you.” he smiled “I’m glad you had a nice time, you deserve it.”

“How was the mission?” she asked “Worth it?”

“Yes and no.” he shrugged “We have a few more leads we can chase up but…” he took a deep breath “I’m beginning to wonder what the point is. He clearly doesn’t wanna be found.”

“The point is he’s your friend, your brother.” Katie smiled, moving her hand to run her fingers over his jawline, the pads scratchings lightly against his 5-oclock shadow. “Maybe he just needs a bit of time to find himself first, that doesn’t mean you have to give up on him. Besides, I need to give him back his jacket.”

“And I need to thank him.” Steve said, “For getting my beautiful girl out and safe.”

“I can’t believe it’s been a year tomorrow since he found me.” she said softly

“Is that what’s been bothering you?” he asked.

“Huh?”

“The last few weeks you’ve not been yourself.”

She licked her lips and nodded “Yeah, I just…well, I didn’t give it much thought when we were on our honeymoon, you know, but since coming back and ramping up the Thrombey Campaign it’s kinda hit home a little.” And suddenly Steve understood. SIP were publishing the man’s latest book, “The Colour of Revenge” which was all about a Detective on the trail of a killer who was hunting down and dispatching of 6 men who had been acquitted of a gang rape and murder.

“Shit…” he let out a groan “Honey I…I’m so stupid not to realise that…” “Hey.”she frowned, “Don’t…” She reached up and smoothed the lines that had appeared on his brow and he let out a sigh, gently reaching up to lace his fingers with hers, bringing her hand towards him and placing a soft kiss on her wrist.

“It’s better now you’re home.” she said gently. He smiled and gave her a gentle kiss again.

“Is that everything?” he pressed and she hesitated again.

“I’m scared.” she said eventually, looking at him.

“Scared of what?”

“Going away, on my own.” she sighed, tears brimming in her eyes “I hate that they made me like this Steve.”

He let out a sigh, he hated that she was scared too. She didn’t deserve it. 

“Why don’t I come with you?” he asked, the idea suddenly forming in his mind.  She stilled for a moment and he continued “Not to the actual meeting, but I can drop you off and pick you up, hang around, whatever you want me to do.”

She looked up at him smiling softly, not even trying to pretend she wasn’t relieved he had offered. “Would you?”

“Of course.” he nodded, wiping the tears off her face. “You only had to ask.” “I didn’t want to.” she admitted “I know how busy you are here and…” “That can wait.” he said, holding her face in his hands as he drove his message home “you’re the most important thing in my life and if me coming with you makes you feel better then…” he shrugged “Besides, I’ve always wanted to go to Boston.”

“We can make a little trip out of it if you like?” she said, somewhat hopefully “Come back on the Saturday?”

“Sure.” he smiled at her. “Let’s do it.”

“Oh Stevie you’re gonna love it.” she beamed, and he smiled at the way her face had gone from being furrowed with worry to alive with excitement. “Massachusetts is amazing in the fall and Boston is just stunning…” “Well I’ll make sure I bring my sketch book.” he smiled “Give me something to do whilst you’re in the meeting.” “Thank you.” she said softly. “I’ll book us somewhere nice to eat one night. Give us an excuse to wear something pretty.”

“Like you need an excuse.” he teased, and she nipped him harshly on the arm. He chuckled and then with a groan he unwillingly pushed himself up off the bed.

“I need a shower.” he said, almost apologetically. “I won’t be long.”

“You better not be.” she muttered and he smiled, dropping a kiss to her forehead before he headed into the bathroom.

True to his word, he wasn’t long. 5 minutes, tops. But by the time he came back, the TV was off and Katie was fast asleep. Thinking back to what Tony had said, he found himself wondering if she had actually slept much at all whilst he was gone.

Steve dried himself off, stepped into a clean pair of boxers and then slid into the bed next to his wife, slipping his arms around her. Once her back was nestled snugly into his chest, he dropped a soft kiss to her neck and closed his eyes, happy to have her in his arms.

****

Steve woke the next morning to find his girl tangled around him. She’d shifted in the night, clearly, and now her face was pressed into his chest, right leg snaked between both of his, her right hand was slid under his arm, lightly gripping his shoulder whilst her left rested against her head, fingers in her hair. Smiling to himself he pulled her closer, relishing the feel of her against him. She murmured something incoherently as she gently moved, her cheek pressing into the hair on his chest, the hand around his shoulder slid down to the base of his back where her fingers simply rested, soft against his spine as she continued to sleep. 

And Steve was quite happy to let her nap for longer, using him as her own personal cuddly toy.

He dozed in and out of consciousness again, drifting off for another 10 minutes or so, before he felt Katie stirring in his arms, and a soft kiss gently being pressed to his jaw line. He smiled at the contact and tightened his hold on her again, his eyes still closed.

“Morning beautiful.” he said softly, his voice still thick with sleep.

“Morning soldier.” she said, her cheek returning to his chest as she basked in the safety and warmth of his hold as his hand crept up the back of the stolen shirt she was wearing, his rough fingers ever so gentle against her skin as he trailed the pads up and down her spine.

“Sleep ok?” he asked, his eyes still not opening.

“Yeah.” she assured him, truthfully. It had been the best night sleep she’d had in days.

“Good. What do you fancy doing today?”

He felt her still and then she pulled back slightly, and at that he opened his eyes and blinked to see those gorgeous emeralds locked onto him.

“Are you not needed at the Compound?”

He shook his head “Kitten, I’ve not seen you for almost 3 days so I figured we deserved one together.”

She groaned “I have meetings this morning.” “That’s ok, I’ll meet you at lunch.” he said, tucking her hair behind her ear.

She didn’t argue. She knew full well why he’d taken the time out, and frankly she adored him for it. Without saying a word she leaned up and captured his lips in a gentle kiss that quickly became heated…but was shattered by the piercing noise of Katie’s alarm.

She gave a groan, and made to move.

“Don’t you dare…” Steve mumbled against her mouth, his grip on her tightening.

“Stevie…” she sighed “I gotta…”

He reached over, his large body flattening her into the mattress making her giggle as he swiped across the screen of her StarkPhone silencing it.

“You ain’t gotta do shit…” he said, hovering over her on his elbows. “Except me.” he added as an afterthought.

“Oh so you’re gonna to explain to the board why I’m late?” she looked at him.

“To be honest...” he said, dipping his head to trail hot kisses up the side of the next “...they probably won’t even notice you’re not there. I mean, are you really that important?”

“Fuck you.” she giggled back.

“Believe me, I’m tryin’” he quipped, his mouth nipping at her ear lobe. That made her giggle even more and she felt his lips curve into a smile against her skin.

“I love it when you do that.” he said gently, using his leg to part hers, leaving a large thigh pressed against her mound.

“What?”

“Laugh.” he said, his mouth moving up her jaw line “Makes me happy.”

“You’re such a sentimental sap.” she mumbled, as his lips claimed hers again, the heat between her legs intensifying as the kiss grew deeper, tongues lashing against one another. Steve pulled back for long enough to pull his shirt over her head before his lips returned to hers and Katie’s hand slid into his hair, one hand gently winding into the longer locks on top, her nails on the other dragging against the hairline on his neck. His hands moved, one gently cupping the side of her face, the other, gently skimming over her breast, her nipples already hardened. He gently teased one with the pad of his thumb and his mouth moved down to the other, his tongue and lips working in tandem. She gave a little involuntary twitch against his thigh and once more his lips quirked up into a smirk.

“You want something baby girl?” he asked, peeking up at her and she nodded.

“Stevie, don’t make me beg, please.”

And when she asked so nicely like that, how could he ever refuse? He hooked his fingers into the sleep shorts she was wearing and worked them down, before flipping down the waist band of his boxers. Katie bent her legs, as he shuffled upwards and worked into her, the pair of them letting out a groan each at the contact. Steve’s hands fell to either side of Katie’s face as he held himself up on his forearms, kissing her deeply as he flexed his hips forward, again and again, picking up a gentle rhythm.

It was soft, it was gentle, it was loving, everything she knew her soldier to be and it wasn’t long before he had her writhing and groaning loudly, his lips assaulting that spot on her neck.

“So good…” he groaned, his thrusts getting deeper. “Feel so good kitten…”

“Keep talking.” she keened, arching into him as her hands raked down his back.

“You were made for me, God I love you Mrs Rogers. So fucking much…” he said, his words punctuated by his heavy breaths as she gave a soft cry, her head falling backwards, eyes fluttering shut as she tightened around him, her legs shuddering slightly as she came.

“Atta girl.” he said, his hips becoming faster as he thrust through her orgasm, chasing his own. It wasn’t long before he felt the ribbons in his belly unravel and he came with a cry of his own, his head buried in her neck, hips slowing, thrusts going deeper before he eventually stilled, a loud contented sigh escaping his mouth.

After a few moments of them simply basking in the afterglow, Katie’s hands trailing through Steve’s ruffled hair as his nose slid against hers, she gave a sigh and pushed on his shoulders gently.

“Baby I really do need to get up.”

He pouted a little causing her to chuckle before he rolled off her and she pushed herself out of bed, heading for the en-suite. Steve watched her go before he swung his legs from under the covers,, found his boxers, pulled them on and headed down to the kitchen to make them both some coffee. *****

The idea had sprung to Katie as she’d headed out for lunch. The local shop was donating a percentage of its earnings that month to a homeless charity, and it set her mind whirring.

“So you want to donate, all the profit we make, from what is going to likely be the biggest book SIP will ever publish, to charity?” Tony looked at her.

“In a nutshell, yeah.” she said, nodding “We can split it across various charities, all those that help victims of sexual assault, abuse or crime…”

“Isn’t that what the Stark Relief Fund is for?” Saul, the SI Finance Director looked at her, and she nodded.

“Yes, but it isn’t just about the money…it’s about raising awareness.” she pressed “A lot of people don’t know those charities existed. Hell, I didn’t know about half of them until a year ago. If we do this, think of the publicity and the press and…”

She trailed off, looking at Tony. He could see the excitement shining in her eyes. She had a point, and it wasn’t like SI needed the money. SIP was her company after all, and if she wanted to use it to do something good, help people, maybe even help herself…then that was fine by him.

He shrugged and looked round the table “SIP’s vision was never about making money.” he said, and Katie beamed at her brother as she realised he was backing her “It was always about helping those who needed a hand to get their work out there…I don’t see why in this case, where they author is already so well-known we can’t use that to help those who need it.”

There was a pause and she looked expectantly round the table. One by one the board members seemed to concede, all of them that is bar their Legal Manager, Dan Robertson who was frowning.

“You’re going to have to bring Mr Thrombey on board Mrs Rogers.” he said, looking at her. “We can’t just use his book as part of a campaign without his permission.” “I know.” she said, nodding. “I’ve already realised that. I’m meeting him on Thursday next week, I’ll have a full proposal and pitch ready.”

There were a few murmurs around the table before Tony spoke “Is that it? Are we settled?”

Everyone looked at one another, nodding, and Katie leaned back in her chair, smiling.

But, she wasn’t smiling now. She had less than 24 hours before they set off for Boston and her pitch was only half way through completion.

“Sweetheart.” Steve’s hands slid over her shoulders where she sat on the chair in her office. She looked effortlessly elegant, even in sweats and an off the shoulder sweater, one toned leg stretched out in front of her, the other bent at the knee so her foot was resting on the seat of the chair, her left hand was curled around her shin, her right was tapping at her keyboard. “It’s late.”

“I know but…” She sighed, “This means a lot to me Steve…I need it to be right.”

Steve knew better than to argue. Instead he leaned over and kissed the side of her neck. “What are you stuck with?”

“I dunno it just…it all seems so impersonal.” she removed her glasses and wrinkled her nose as he sat down in the arm chair in the corner of the room “Facts and figures on sexual assaults and stuff…we all know it happens, it’s about making people want to do something about it.”

“Are you ready to make it personal?” he asked gently, taking a deep breath. He hated thinking about what she had gone through, he truly did, and if he had half a chance he’d rip the bastards limb from limb. But if she was ready to confront what had happened to her, he had to be there to support and back her all of the way, regardless of his own feelings.

“I don’t know.” she said softly “I was talking to Pepper about this the other day. I should be able to, I should be someone other women can look up to, being an Avenger and all but…maybe I’m just not strong enough.” “You’re the strongest person I know.” he leaned forward and locked eyes with her.

“I don’t feel like it when it comes to this.” she sighed.

“Honey…” he scratched at his head “Without wanting to sound flippant, since January this year, you’ve been, ok…well maybe ok isn’t the word but you’ve gotten on with things. You’ve moved forward, we both did.”

“Because we were busy, and we had no choice…”

“Well maybe…” he shrugged “But chasing down a sceptre, fighting Ultron, mobilising a new base, planning a wedding, running a business…it’s all time consuming, stressful stuff that if you really weren’t strong enough to deal with what happened, then it would have all gone to shit and probably tipped you over the edge into a nervous breakdown.”

She brushed a piece of hair behind her ear as she considered what he was saying.

“Honestly…” he continued, his eyes boring into hers. “If you want my opinion I think the fact that it’s the year’s anniversary of what happened that’s playing on your mind a little. You need to stop, look back and how well you’ve done and stop beating yourself up about all the things you haven’t”

She smiled softly and looked down at her hands before she glanced back up at him “When did you get so wise?” He chuckled “Well I am 97 years old.”

She laughed “You don’t look a day over 28.”

He smiled and stood up “I’m gonna make you a hot chocolate, and you’re gonna stop overthinking that and come relax, we’re up early tomorrow. You can do the rest at the hotel tomorrow evening.” “No can do, we’re going out.” she grinned at him “I booked the Chef’s table at Menton…”

“The what?” Steve frowned.

“You never heard of a Chef’s table?” she looked at him, and he shook his head “oh my God I’ve let you down…so badly. Check this out.” she tapped on her computer, bringing up the website and showed him the photos “It’s a private table with a glass wall that gives you a direct view into the kitchen. Totally impossible to get a reservation unless you book like a year in advance…or name drop.”

Steve groaned “You seriously dropped the Captain America wants a table line?”

“Yup” she popped the p as she smirked, closing down the browser page.

“Pain in my ass.” he grumbled, standing up. But as he left the office there was a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

One that his wife had seen.

*****

“So, was it worth a name drop?” Katie asked as they walked back into the Fireside Lounge located in their hotel.

“I’m happy to overlook the fact you acted like a total brat to make that reservation, yes.” he grinned as he went to remove her coat from her shoulders. He looked her up and down, the jump suit she was in was driving him crazy.

She grinned, and shivered slightly.

“Cold?” he asked, frowning.

“A little, don’t wanna sit in my coat though.”

“Do you want me to nip up to the room, grab your cardigan?”

“Would you?” she asked, even though she knew perfectly well he would.

“Course.” he said, dropping a kiss to her cheek “You get the drinks in, be right back.”

She headed over to the bar. The bartender, Will, was the same one who had been on before so he greeted her with a smile.

“Mrs Rogers. How was your meal?”

“Fantastic thank you.” she grinned “Can I get 2 Bourbon’s please? I’ll leave it to your choice, I’ll be back in a second, just need to nip to the bathroom.”

She excused herself and once she’d finally had the pee she’d been dying for since they left the restaurant, she set about touching up her make-up, smiling to herself. She’d deliberately picked this jumpsuit as she knew it got Steve’s blood pumping. It was a simple, plain black one with a V-neck line, but it was tight. Teamed with a thin red leather belt, red leather Jimmy-Choos and a matching bag all set off by the bright red lipstick she was sporting, she knew she looked good. Not that Steve had much room to talk, she could happily perve on him in the dark grey suit he was wearing, teamed with a black dress shirt, his collar left open…he looked good enough to eat, which she was planning on doing later.

She headed back into the bar and spotted Steve perched on one of the stools.

“Hey handsome” she said, slipping her arms round him from the back. But the moment she did that she realised something was off. He felt different, he was softer than Steve was. He smelt different, there was a really heavy woody scent to his aftershave whereas Steve’s preferred Hugo Boss or Gucci, depending on his mood, were both a lot lighter. And when the man spun to face her, although the likeness was indeed uncanny at first glance, his eyes were cold and calculating, his jaw line wasn’t quite as sharp as Steve’s and the smirk he wore on his face was nothing like the cheeky one Steve would sport. It was almost a sneer which spread across his face, every feature laced with disdain.

“What the fuck?” the man glared at her as Katie stepped back, holding her hands up in apology.

“I’m sorry, genuine case of mistaken identity…” she said, taking him in. His shirt was the wrong colour too, only she hadn’t been able to see that from the back.

“Yeah well if you’re touting for business I already got some today so get lost…” the man drawled in his light, Boston accent. “Like I just said I thought you were…hang on…” She frowned as his words registered “You already got some?”

“Yeah, that’s right.” he said, looking her up and down.

“You think I’m a hooker?” Katie snorted.

“Pretty high end one though, I’ll give you that.” the man said, nodding at her.

“I’m not a hooker.” she shook her head, laughing in disbelief.

“Oh, sorry. Do you prefer the term escort?” he raised an eyebrow.

She rolled her eyes, flashing her left hand at him. “I’m married, this was a genuine mistake….” she said, her temper rising slightly. She moved away from him to the side, nodding at Will who slid the check over for her to sign to charge the drinks to their room.

Ransom observed her for a moment, fighting the smirk that was threatening to break across his face. After another row with his stupid Libtard cousin and his mother who had been at his Grandfather’s house before, he’d come out with the sole intention of getting laid and then so drunk he could hardly remember his name. After a visit to one of his usual fuck buddies he’d achieved the first part, now he was concentrating on the second. He’d been initially irritated by this woman’s interruption, but now she was getting sassy back, and he wasn’t about to let it drop. He could tell she had money, that much was clear to see. The way she talked, held herself, was dressed. Whilst she wasn’t a hooker as he had originally thought (although to be fair to her, she was pretty hot, he’d consider fucking her if the opportunity arose) she was probably living off some 70 odd year old rich banker husband. A trophy wife. Huh, maybe she wanted a fuck after all…hell, he might not have to pay for it. Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth and all that.

“And does your husband know you’re here trying to tap me up?” he looked at her.

“You know, if I was trying to errr…tap you up, you wouldn’t be able to afford me” she shot back, signing her name on the cheque with a flourish.

“Try me.” Ransom shot back, making a show of looking her up and down. “How much for that ass?” “I’ll kick yours for free you self entitled dick.” she said, sliding the signed paper and pen back to the bartender.

Ransom gave a bark of a laugh “I’ll pass thanks.”

Katie snorted and glanced sideways at look at him, scarlet red lips pursed as she eyed him over her glass of bourbon. “Good decision, because I’ve dropped bigger men than you for fun.” “Sure you have Dollface” Ransom quirked an eyebrow, elbow leaning on the bar, angling his body towards her. She kept hers facing forwards, arms resting on the bar top, her head shaking slightly.

“You have no fucking idea who I am do you?” Katie shook her head, not looking at the prick stood next to her.  She hated using that line, but, well, when the occasion arose to get one over on a weasely little shit like this, she wasn’t going to pass it up.

“Why should I?” he snorted “I don’t know all the little bitches in Boston.”

She felt her mouth drop open and she was about to retaliate when Steve gently appeared by her side, dropping her cardigan over her shoulders.

Ransom recognised him straight away. He’d had it quite often, been told he looked similar to Captain America. So this meant the woman he’d been baiting for the last 5 minutes was his wife, Katie Rogers, sister of Billionaire Tony Stark, the Avenger, Supernova.

He’d called Supernova a hooker.

Ransom looked into his glass of scotch, turning away back to the bar, snorting with laughter.

“Sorry baby, Sam called and…” Steve stopped, frowning at the look on Katie’s face. “You ok?”

“Fine.” she said, looking up at him, smiling and nodding towards a cosy sofa over at the other side of the bar. “You wanna go sit down over there?”

“Sure.” he said, picking up his glass of bourbon he held out his free hand for her and she jumped down off the stool.

“I’d like to say it’s been a pleasure.” She snarked to the man next to her “But I don’t lie so…”

Steve frowned, wondering what had gone down whilst he’d been away. He glanced at his wife and then turned to look at the guy that was sat on the stool next to where Katie had been to see if he recognised him and did a double take. He recognised him alright, but only because he looked incredibly like him. Granted, there were a few subtle differences, but the resemblance was uncanny, to the point that at a first glance in the street, you could be fooled.

“Pal, you should keep that bitch on a leash.” Ransom spoke, his eyebrows raising and in front of him Steve stiffened.

“What did you just say?” he frowned, pulling himself up to full height.

“Seriously, man. You save the world from Nazi’s, get frozen for 70 years and then end up marrying that.” Ransom smirked, enjoying baiting the Captain “I’d ask ‘em to put you back under…”

Steve’s nostrils flared and he felt his neck getting warmer. “Don’t you dare talk about my wife like that...”

“Steve, leave it, come on.” Katie said gently, patting Steve on the chest “The guy’s a complete ass hole. If brains were dynamite I doubt he’d have enough to blow his head off.”

“Well if we’re talking about blowing...” Ransom looked Katie up and down before locking onto her eyes. “You up for the job?

Katie let out a bark of a laugh, her hand still on Steve’s chest which was positively humming with anger as she turned to face Ransom, contempt etched across every single inch of her face.

“Go jerk yourself off and wipe it on a curtain like your father should have done with you.” she said.

“I’d rather wipe it in your hair.” came the quip back.

And that was it. That was the point that Steve Rogers snapped.

There was a loud smash, the glass he was holding shattered in his grip as his fist contracted in pure anger. Katie barely had time to realise what had happened before he had stepped forward and grabbed Ransom by the front of his shirt, lifting him and slamming him on the bar.

“Steve!” she said, pulling on his arm. “Baby he really isn’t worth it, let go!”

“Captain Rogers!” Will behind the bar was desperately trying to talk him down as well “Please, don’t make me call security.”

Security! Steve wanted to snort. Like that would do any good.

“Baby, come on…” Katie tried again, pleading to his reasonable side. “Look, we’ve had such a nice night. Don’t let him ruin it.”

Steve let out a deep breath, he wanted nothing more than to knock the asshole’s teeth down his throat, but he felt Katie’s touch on his arm and her pleading tone and he let go, shoving the man hard.

“I would tell you to apologise.” Steve snarled stepping back. His voice was steely, eyes carrying none of their usual warmth “But I suspect it’s pointless”

“Yup.” Ransom nodded “Totally pointless.”

“Like your existence.” Katie mumbled, Ransom snorting in response. “Look, Drysdale, my manager’s told you before.” Will said, his voice laced with vexation as he shuffled from behind the bar to sweep up the glass that Steve had shattered. “Any more trouble and you’re gonna be banned.”

Ransom’s nostrils flashed angrily as he looked at the man “’I’m gonna be banned? Eat shit, he’s the one that just attacked me! He ripped my shirt!” he gestured down to where Steve had grabbed him, two tears either side of the buttons of his shirt “This is a Fendi!”

“Ransom, just shut up and apologise.” Will pressed again, “Or you’re gonna have to leave.”

“Fuck this, I was going anyway.” Ransom snarled, knocking back his drink. He stood up and pulled on a long, tan coloured camel coat before he glared at Steve then Katie “Really bad smell in here.”

Katie rolled her eyes, deciding to let him have that childish one without any fuss. But Steve didn’t.

“Close the door on your way out.”  He watched as the man stopped, took a deep breath before angrily flinging the door open, his coat flapping behind him. There was a moment’s pause before it slammed shut. 

“Sorry.” Steve turned, apologising to Will. 

“He’s a dirt bag and a cretin.” Will shrugged, as he waved the apology off. “No redeeming features whatsoever. Well, none that I’ve seen and trust me, I’ve seen him a hell of a lot.”

“Is your hand ok?” Katie asked Steve gently. She turned his right hand over to see that there were no cuts at all from the glass, which was good.

“Yeah, fine, don’t worry.” Steve looked at her, frowning. “Honey, what on Earth just happened?” he asked her softly, as she took a deep breath, blowing it out of her mouth.

“I went to the bathroom and when I came back, well, I thought he was was you from behind so gave him a hug.” she shook her head “Soon as I touched him I realised I was very, very wrong. I tried to apologise and he called me a hooker.”

“A hooker?” Steve repeated, arching an eyebrow.

“Yeah, so I told him even if I was he wouldn’t be able to afford me.”

At that Will, who had been busy pouring them both another drink, laughed as he slid 2 short tumblers of bourbon back over to them.  “He won’t have liked that at all.”

Steve nodded his thanks to the man as Katie looked at him. “How come?” she asked.

“Well, Ransom’s mother likes to claim she’s a self-made millionaire. Fails to mention the million dollar loan her dad gave her to start up her business like, but that’s by the by. Simply put, his family one way or another are loaded, and Ransom likes to be the flash bastard if you get what I mean.”

“What do his family do?” Katie asked, “I’ve never even heard of the Drysdales, and I’m pretty well connected…”

“His mother and father run some real Estate Company.”  Will shrugged, “A local one round Massachusetts, but you’ll have heard of his grandfather, or if you haven’t you’ve been living under a rock for the last 20 years.” “Who?” she asked.

“Harlan Thrombey, the crime fiction author.” Will said, and Katie felt the colour drain from her face. She turned to look at Steve whose eyes had also widened, and she gave a groan.

“Shit.”

@the-omni-princess​  @momobaby227​ @geekofmanythings16​ @angelofhell-666​ @thewackywriter​ @marvelfansworld​​  @cobalt-gear​  @asgardlover75�� @jennmurawski13​​​  @jtargaryen18​​ @saiyanprincessswanie​​  @navispalace​​ @patzammit​​  @joannaliceevans-fanficblog​​  @icanfeelastormbrewing​​ @djeniiscorner​​  @ayamenimthiriel​​  @coldmuffinbanditshoe​​  @disneylovingal​​ @madzmilllz​  @sgtjaamesbaarnes​ @sweater-daddiesdumbdork​

#stark spangled banner #knives out #steve rogers x original female character #steve rogers x oc #steve rogers #captain america #tony stark #iron man #ransom drysdale #mcu #mcu fanfiction #marvel #marvel fanfiction #avengers #avengers fanfiction #cross over #americas asshole #americas ass

[avidfanficwriter]

Spoken in Silence (Chapter 1)

Characters: Clint Barton x Tony Stark

Rating: Rated M.

Warnings: Cursing, Possible suicide attempt, depression, PTSD, self-doubt, angst, Cheating, Secret life, mentions of torture, romantic interest, one sided attraction (Kinda), bonding over pain, mentions/references towards child abuse not explicitly explained, Spoilers for Endgame in later chapters, (MORE TO COME AS UPDATED)

Summary:  Let it be known that nothing happened between Clint Barton and Tony Stark, nothing. Technically, speaking. It was just longing glances and unspoken words but they both know it’s there. They both know there’s a clear line of how far they’re caring towards one another can go without going to far.

READ ON A03

Nick Fury invited Tony Stark to the lab-to be more correct Fury demanded that Tony be present at the lab because he was tired of Tony breathing down his neck asking what was going on, it was easier to give him a taste rather than wait for Stark to discovered everything on his own. It’s a ruse, Tony knows that long before they arrived at SHIELD headquarters, he was sticking his nose somewhere it didn’t belong and Fury was getting antsy. “We show him the basic stuff. Things that won’t get his Stark brain running.” Was the original plan but things quickly went to shit. The damn tesseract, the cube they had spent forever searching for was creating problems conveniently when Tony was around. As Dr. Selvig put it: “She’s misbehaving.” with hidden concern masked in his voice.

“Did you buy her a drink?” Was Tony’s unhelpful response.

Everyone in the room was clueless, it’s a mystery as to what created the power surge even more so was trying to find a way to stop it. The tesseract flickers, blue lights emitting around the room mimicking the way fire acts as the building shifts again. The ceiling is crumbling, falling beneath their feet as Tony finds his way to a computer monitor hoping he can help but also taking the opportunity to insert his own flash drive into their systems. A large deep blue light fills the room, creating a portal behind the cube and Fury knows this day is only going to get worse.

A man appears within the light, long jet black hair with swollen red eyes dressed in a gold and green outfit with a terrifying smile on his face. His hand is tightly holding a spear that only worsens the fear sinking into everyone’s body, the look on his face, the threatening stance, he’s no friend.

Tony is suddenly picking himself up off the floor, his vision blurred and a high pitched ringing sound filling his ears. His memory is vague, the last thing he remembers was Fury shouting, curses spilling from his mouth, the sound of gunshots, blue glow and then darkness. A trail of wet cold blood falls down his forehead that he swipes his fingers at, he doesn’t remember blacking out, hurting himself or being so close to the wall. His body aches, head is pounding and he’s searching for Fury whose focused on another man, Clint. They’d met moments before chaos broke out.

Tony barely knows the man, didn’t remember his last name or his position, just a colorful moniker: “This is the hawk.” The man is trying to fight against the unknown assailant only to fail, he feels his chest constrict and lungs struggle to pull in enough oxygen.

Tony watches the man become a hostage and the pain he feels is unbearable. It’s as if his own heart is being viciously ripped from his chest, rips torn aimlessly and fingers clawing at his flesh to retrieve it. He was helpless, no suit at his dispense, his legs unable to move, he’s forced to watch. The man becomes a victim and soon after a monster.

It’s magic, Tony’s least favorite thing. Magic wasn’t fair, the magician can simple wave their fingers and the fight goes in their favor.

There’s a tinge of deep blue that melts into Clint’s eyes, a startling change in his behavior is evident. He stands straight, arms at his side and gun holstered. Tony should be trying to aid those who tried and failed to take on this villain but he can’t move. His brown eyes are glued to Clint as the man speaks, “I am Loki… of Asgard.” Is all he can make out clearly. He’s to focused on what’s going on with– or the lack of what’s going on with Clint. He’s frozen, oblivious to the anything around him. His eyes glowing and chest raising peacefully as he breathes. He’s been compromised.

Clint stands just a few feet away from everyone who could save him, bodies of the agents before him who tried to take on the villian lay motionless around him. The gun is still in his hand but he can’t move it, he can’t find the strength to make his finger pull the trigger, this spear that’s touching his chest is changing him. His vision blurs, his body changes and his brains fills with thoughts that are no longer his own. A voice echoes through his mind, “You’ll listen to me. Do what I say. What i ask for.” The words are on repeat, filling every orifice of his mind and threatening his very existence. He’s losing his grasp on reality, loosing who he is. He manages one last look around, the faces of his colleagues burn into his brain, it’s bad. The look of fear etched onto each of their faces says what’s happening to him is just as bad to witness as it is to experience it. His eyesight falls to Tony, the billionaire who moonlights as a superhero with over moussed hair and facial hair trimmed to perfection, even his face is morphed into pain.

It’s paralysis, Clint begins to realize, he’s unable to move or speak but his mind is still active. He can hear what Loki demands him to do but he’s not the one responding. He’s not the one controlling his body. Every decision and move is controlled by Loki, even the sounds of his voice is wrong. This voice, the new voice is deeper and dry.

He’s in a prison, he soon realizes, trapped inside of his mind while his body is forced to carry out horrible acts of violence. He can see it all, every order her carries out, every person he victimizes all play like a broken record. The lives he took and the people he hurt, he sees it all and worse, he remembers it all.

It’s Tony alongside his new/old friend, (He’s not entirely sure where they stand as of right now) Natasha that have the hardest time dealing with the events surrounding Clint. Tony can’t sleep or continue his day knowing that man was sacrificed and Fury isn’t doing a damn thing about it. His mind torments him with pleas to rescue Clint. It’s escalated since Tony’s met Loki’s brother, Thor. He’s interacting with this man who grow up with a monster, a being who believes he is the true ruler of man and nothing will stand in his way. “What the hell are we going to do about Clint?” Tony shouts at Fury as he enters his office. Fury seems to be the only person unfazed by Clint’s behavior.

“What does that mean, Stark?”

“Barton, he’s Loki’s bitch.”

Fury sighed with a shrug of his shoulders. “Barton was aware of the risks.”

Fury had pissed Tony off in the past, putting him on house arrest for starters was one time but now, refusing to help one of his own agents was more than irritating. “That’s what we are to you? Expendable assets?”

“Each of you is aware of the risks.” Was all Fury said turning his attention back to his work. “If any of you have a problem, you know where the door is.” It takes all the strength inside of Tony to not lash out on the man. He tries to let it go, tries desperately to forget what he said but he can’t.

Clint’s falling further down the rabbit hole as the days pass, the last remaining pieces of him are starting to betray him. He’s forgetting names and memories, it’s getting harder and harder to recall who people are. There were moments of the day, where suddenly he can’t remember where he is, how he got there or who the person who has his bullet inside of them is. It’s as if he’s sleepwalking. This his worst nightmare comes true, he’s fighting not alongside but against, his friend, his family Natasha Romanoff. Punching, kicking, weapons are involved, anything they can get their hands on is used against the other. He tries to fight it, tries to do everything in his power to prevent this from continuing. That this power Loki has over him can be beat. He can win. He has too. If he doesn’t, he’ll kill her.

It’s luck or an act of God when a metal clang reverberates through his ears and after what seems like years of fighting, he’s free. “Natasha.” He thinks he says but he’s not sure. The severe throbbing in his head is moving around his head like gel, slowly covering all areas of his brain and clouding his hearing. The last thing he sees is Natasha standing before him out of breathe, her fiery red hair glowing in the light and her fist coming straight at him.

The virus inside of his brain is gone, Loki is gone but he’s left with a wrath. A headache so bad, his vision is going in and out, his body feels as though he’s swaying and he can’t seem to focus on one thing for too long. Natasha saved him, “Cognitive recalibration… I hit you really hard in the head.” She explains with a smirk.

Clint’s thankful, more than thankful, he’s indebted to her.

The redhead leaves him with well wishes and small kiss to his forehead, reminding him he’s not responsible for his actions while under Loki’s control. The moment the door closes behind her, the memories haunt him. Screams and pleas to live, Loki’s damned voice demanding orders. He closes his eyes, clenches his jaw and tries to fight the urge to scream. He killed innocent people without a second thought, he become a criminal.

A voice pulls him out of the darkness, Tony Stark’s voice. The genius who graduated M.I.T. at some insanely young age and is in the news every day for some crazy antic as Iron Man is standing before him. He met him earlier, before his brain was shaken and stirred. Stark referred to him as Fury’s underling when they met and shared a few sarcastic jokes. This time, Tony has no wise cracks or comedic tone, it’s conversation he doesn’t know to react to.

“Brought you these.” Tony says handing him a small plastic cup filled with water and two white pills. “Romanoff said she cracked you in the head.” He lets out a small sigh and sits on the chair near the bed. “How are you feeling, Barton?”

No nickname again. It’s just Barton. it feels respectful, the notorious playboy is actually treating him equal. “Like a broken toy.” Clint responds in a groggy voice.

“You good to keep going?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you want to keep going?”

“Of course.”

“Good. We need all hands on deck for this one.” Tony reaches out and rests his palm on Clint’s shoulder, there’s no weight to his touch as if Tony doesn’t want to invade his personal space. Clint meets his eyes, his head still pounding and vision starting to come back. “I’m glad you’re good, Clint.” Clint swears and maybe it’s the pain in his body that is convincing him of this but the next thing Tony does and says has to be imagined. “I’m sorry it took us so long to save you.” He whispers and lets a quick smile across his face.

He nods, brows furrowed and lips pressed tightly together. It’s the drugs, he tells himself or the splitting headache. The painkillers kicking in or the sedative they gave him wearing off. Tony didn’t mean it. Tony probably wasn’t even there. He imagined it… he has to of. It doesn’t make any sense.

It’s the first moment, Tony realized he cared more about Clint than he should have. His heart speed up when he found out Clint was saved and his heart broke at the sight of him strapped to a chair while Natasha takes him off a ledge. His emotions were on high and he wanted to soothe pain that was radiating off of the archer. If Clint was a machine this would be easier, a complete reboot, a new circuit board along with a fresh coat of was, he’d be as good as new but with a person, Tony was clueless. How do you fix a person? How do you fix a person you barely know? How would he even start? They don’t know one another and Tony’s record with people isn’t a highlight reel.

Clint discovers an odd feeling burrowing in his chest for Tony Stark during their battle of New York, their all hands on deck moment. The first time the Avengers are together in battle. It’s a terrifying moment but it told Clint that he cared more about him than he intended on.

A nuke originally sent to save the world from alien destruction was now humanity’s biggest threat. It was a selfless act, one Clint probably would have done if he had the resources too, a one way trip. Certain death with no way out. In a split second, Tony grabs the Nuke and guides it into the wormhole. He was gone. Tony Stark, Iron Man was both the victim and the savior.

“Clost it.” Clint head over the ear piece.

“What about Stark?’ He shouts.

Clint can’t get his emotions under control as he watches the scene play out.  A ear piercing, "No!” finds it’s way past his lips. Panic fills his body as the wormhole starts to close and Tony is nowhere to be found. Tony wasn’t flying back to earth, he wasn’t cheering or demanding a beer for his accomplishments, it’s silent. Blue eyes search for Tony’s shining gold and red armour, silently praying he’s safe.

By an act of God, Tony was back.

Clint can recount every detail, down to the last second while he stood helplessly on the roof of a building and watched as Tony plummeted to earth. His breath caught in his throat, his skin crawled and his blood ran cold. The grip he has on his bow tightens threatening to break it as he holds back the tears. He’s going to watch Tony die.

Tony’s lifeless body, the lack of movement, it sends shockwaves through his heart.

He wants to jump off the building. He wants to do something. His brain has came up with hundreds of scenarios of how he can help but they’d both fall to their death. The archer remains on the building shutting his eyes, unable to bare witness to the scene any longer, he waits. Waits for it to be over. Waiting for someone over the line to say Tony had died.

The crack of Tony’s suit hitting the ground never comes, there was no call from other team members, the coms were silent. Until he heard the roar of the Hulk followed by a loud crash, he opened his eyes and saw the Hulk placing Tony onto the ground. “Is Stark okay?’ He asks once Captain America and Thor surround Tony.

The sight is horrendous.

Seconds felt like minutes and minutes felt like hours.

"He’s fine!” Cap says in a rushed tone. Clint lets out a breathy chuckle, ripping out his ear piece and tossing it to the ground with a heavy sigh. Tears fall from his eyes as he struggles to catch his breath, Tony is safe. It’s a strange feeling nestled inside of Clint’s chest when he finally watches Tony rise to his feet and take a few unsteady steps, the Iron Man suit reflects the glimmer of the sun as he grips Captain America’s shoulder. He’s safe. He tells himself, he’s fine. Breathing and okay.

“Worried about me birdman?” Clint hears Tony’s ask over his discarded ear piece.

Clint lets out a quick breathe as he picks his ear piece up off the floor and puts it back on. “Just worried about who’s going to pick up the bill for dinner. I’m feeling like steak.” Clint tries to hide the agony in his voice, the knot formed in his throat is slowly starting to dissipate but the racing of his heart has yet to cease.

“Have you ever tried shawarma? There’s a shawarma joint about two blocks from here. I don’t know what it is, but I wanna try it.” Tony says in an all to happy voice for someone who just nearly died.

Clint laughs, using his free hand to wipe the tears the streak his face. “Ye-yeah. That sounds good, Tin man.”

#Clint Barton #clint francis barton #Hawkeye #Iron Man #Tony Stark #Stark #Clint Barton Fanfiction #Tony Stark fanfiction #Marvel #marvel the avengers #The Avengers #Avengers #Avengers: Age of Ultron #avengers: infinity war #avengers: endgame #avengers assemble #Jeremy Renner #Jeremy Renner fanfic #Jeremy renner fic #Jeremy Renner fanfiction #Jeremy lee renner #Robert Downey Jr fanfiction #robert Downey jr Fanfic #Robert Downey jr fic #Robert Downey jr #Robert Downey jr imagine #jeremy renner imagine #Clint Barton fic #Clint barton fanfic #clint 'hawkeye' barton

[rabbiteclair]

So, a whole lot of notes on Flatscreen. This is, like, halfway my attempt to analyze what I was doing for myself, so I can't guarantee they'll be informative or interesting to anyone else, but hey. It should go without saying that there are tons of spoilers in here.

Mysteries And Stuff

I guess the big thing on my end was that I deliberately went out of my way to avoid establishing a definite answer about What's Actually Going On with big facets of the story. Like, I didn't come up with them at all. Some of them don't strictly need answers. Some of them I felt were best left mysteries. Overall, though, subjectivity was kinda a theme for the story as a whole, so it felt appropriate to leave as much as possible open to interpretation. Most of these have apparent explanations within the story that work, because I still wanted a coherent narrative, but here's a short list of things I deliberately kept a bit vague: Does Gensokyo exist in this timeline? Compare the list of occult goodies Renko inherited from Sumireko in Flatscreen:

There are a handful of keepsakes, passed down from your grandma, that have managed to keep your faith in the supernatural alive. A photo of a gate in the Netherworld, with cherry blossoms on one side and a mundane graveyard on the other. A series of videos from her long-archived blog where she's bending spoons and levitating balls with her mind. A rock she brought back from 'some pyramid or another' that does, in fact, sharpen any razors you leave near it.

to Eyes in the Dark:

It had been a large box full of stuff, and practically the only mundane thing in it was a pack of Zener cards.

There was also a photo of a gate in the Netherworld, with cherry blossoms on one side and a mundane graveyard on the other. I know it's the Netherworld, because Maribel and I investigated it once. (Case File #6) There was a series of selfies that my grandma had taken with people she swore were youkai. (A few of them did have remarkably realistic costumes if not.) A recording of an unearthly song that did strange things to the listener's mood, that was supposedly from a youkai night sparrow. A heavily-warded jar with what could only be a ghost of some sort bound inside.

Flatscreen Renko... really didn't get anything impressive, apart from maybe the Netherworld photo from Ghostly Field Club. Maybe Sumireko just didn't leave her much--Renko doesn't really seem to know anything substantial about Gensokyo in the canon stories, after all. Maybe the Sealing Club stories are an alternative timeline from the main Touhou canon, and Maribel is traveling between worlds when she visits Gensokyo (we already know she's ended up in current-Gensokyo's past before, so it wouldn't really be much weirder.) Plus, Fantasy wasn't in very good state when Renko visited it. I think that's probably the case either way--Gensokyo would be a pretty crowded place if every single forgotten god, myth, or youkai ended up there. But, you can definitely point to it as evidence that Gensokyo isn't out there making things better, if you want. Is Renko the real Renko? What even counts as 'real' in this particular case? Whether or not this all happens in the same world or timeline as Gensokyo, Renko might not be The Renko that Maribel remembers. She raises the possibility herself in chapter 3--she has a past that she remembers, with no Maribel in it. It's entirely possible that by erasing Maribel, the monster changed the past and made a new timeline with a whole new Renko. Or maybe she's from a pre-existing timeline and was out there all along. Or, hell, if we're considering alternative timelines anyway, maybe this isn't the same Renko or Maribel from the Sealing Club stories. Or maybe Maribel is right, it's all one tidy timeline, and the monster didn't do much except alter some of Renko's memories. I did kinda wimp out on this one a little, by letting Renko regain memories of Maribel. It undermines some of these possibilities, but I couldn't stand the thought of having Renko go through all of that and only remember a single week with her. What is the monster? I really wanted Renko to make some kind of Black Hole Information Paradox comparison here, but never found a way to shoehorn it in. Regardless, it kinda fits. Whether the monster was a god, or a youkai, or whatever, almost by definition, there's no way of knowing what it used to be. All that information was lost when it got completely forgotten. Or maybe Maribel's theory is completely wrong, and these things aren't gods. She was guessing on pretty thin evidence. Renko thought she saw claws on some of them, and the main monster had some kind of weird features at times too. Stealing existence might be a bit much for an undead myth. If you want to interpret it as some kind of minor elder horror or an especially unstylish Excrucian or something, it doesn't change much about the story except maybe some of the implications. This is part of the reason I avoided giving it a name. The other half was for horror purposes--having Renko give it a snappy nickname like she did in Eyes in the Dark would make it feel a little less scary, I think. For what it's worth, in my notes, I referred to it as the Static.

History and connection with Eyes in the Dark

I really gave most of the relevant bits in the notes at the beginning of the story on AO3. The short version is, the story didn't originally have a monster, and when I decided to add one, a few rounds of expansion later, I had the outline for Eyes in the Dark. There are a few tracts of text that I originally copied over verbatim, and any differences in the section between the two stories evolved over time. The stuff about fake fish is one of them. Renko's big list of stuff Sumireko left for her is another. The monster from Flatscreen is fairly similar to the first iteration of what became the Watcher. When I went to add monster(s) to the first partial draft of Flatscreen, I thought it would be best if it was something that could threaten Maribel, even with her TV-dwelling nature, so a TV-filling monster was one of my first ideas. Obviously the monsters in both stories evolved quite a bit from that point, so it'd be incorrect to say that it's an earlier evolution of the Watcher. This is probably why both stories pretty heavily revolve around televisions, though. The lack of a monster to add some opposition was one of the two things that made me shelve the first draft of Flatscreen.

The other one was the lack of an ending. 'And then Maribel became Yukari' is practically a stock ending for Sealing Club stories, but somehow it didn't occur to me for about two and a half years.

Chapters 1-3 are pretty similar to what the original draft had, minus the monster. In the original draft, Maribel’s plan was to take Renko on a tour of various places they’d visited together, to try jogging her memory, which might hopefully help Maribel become real again. The plan was for Renko to get more and more absorbed in the fantasy world with Maribel in it, while Maribel just kept getting weaker and weaker. Eventually, Maribel would get too weak to even show up outside of Renko’s dreams, and Renko would decide it was better to float off into nonexistence with her than stick around on Earth alone.

... this was the plan for about thirty seconds before I realized it kinda sucks, at least. The lack of a satisfying ending was the main thing that made me drop the story and move on to other ideas.

Yukari!!!

Anybody who’s talked to me on the topic much (this is a list that has like two people on it, so in retrospect this was a bad way to introduce this paragraph) knows that I’m actually not all that fond of ‘Yukari is older Maribel’ as an interpretation of their relationship, in general. For one thing, whenever canon has a big open question and everyone just kind of decides it has to be answered the same way, I wanna go the opposite direction just to spite them. (See also: the idea of the previous shrine maiden being Reimu’s mom.) For another, I feel like it produces a lot of kinda crappy stories. I’ve read a ton of doujin and stuff where Maribel isn’t a character, she’s a macguffin for Renko to chase after, or a placeholder to stand around until Yukari pops up.

... but it isn’t an inherently bad idea, so I was able to convince myself to end the story like this after a while.

If I had to guess (and I do, since it’s another thing where I didn’t come up with a strict Objectively True Answer), it was just kinda the first step. That talk she gave about ending up somewhere else eventually was pretty open-ended. It definitely made her a bit weirder and more... eldritch. Probably, she drifted around in there for a while, ended up way in the past, and came back to find Renko again once she was able to. Could’ve been decades or centuries on her end.

I did definitely mean to drop some hints about how this all led to her becoming Yukari, though. Between the abandoned tanuki house and the really horrible state of Fantasy in the last chapter, it isn’t hard to see where she might get interested in something like Gensokyo. She’s literally playing around with the boundary between fantasy and reality before the story starts. And her walled-off fantasy bubble in the last chapter is basically a mini-Gensokyo, if you wanna think about it that way.

... I think that’s all the stuff I intended to cover? If I missed anything, feel free to shoot me a question, I guess.

#rabbit does fanfiction

[honeyandfiregame]

UHH. Be still my heart. Angry Day has inspired an angst request. So some incident, or a combination of just god-awful trainwrecks has put RO!Day (and maybe RO!Zenos. Would either do this? Idk. Angst needs no logic.) in the WORST mood, and the MC goes to calm them. But in their anger, something that the MC says upsets them, and they respond with something mean that just breaks the MC, who runs away in tears, completely inconsolable. How does Day (and Zenos?) react?

Day doesn’t get legit angry much at all, so it was hard to think of a scenario where this could happen. The only one I could come up with, well… Not only is this under a readmore because it’s long, but it also dances around and kind of over the edge of spoiler territory. It’s vague and alludes to something I’ve already kind of said about Day, so I still feel like I can post it. But if you want to keep some of the mystery about Day until the game is complete, I’d suggest not reading this. This is a wildly different side of Day than what you’ve seen. (Also this isn’t written in relation to the canon timeline and character development, so if his behavior when he’s romanced in canon ends up seeming different from how he is in this, that’s why :p)

I didn’t do one for Zenos this time, but I might do that later.

There’s a tremor in his hands and a ringing in his head. Day looks up from his trembling fingers, the world tilts on its axis but his eyes focus on that glint of gold, that crest of bastards. His stomach turns. He’s disgusted, alarms going off in his brain that makes him want to react, but he knows anything he does in this moment will draw to much attention and his boots are planted firmly on the ground. His vision shifts, but his body stays still.

Disgusted.

He doesn’t recognize the faces, he doesn’t know them, but if they wear that crest they’re sons of witches all the same. That much is true. No, he’s not the creature of Hell, neither Ira nor Gula, it’s them.

He doesn’t realize he’s clenched his jaw tight and his hands have furled into fists, an internal battle fighting against and for grabbing the sword off his back, while his eyes burn holes in the backs of aristocratic sinners. He doesn’t realize until you touch his shoulder and release him from the spell, making him jolt and suck in a breath.

He turns to you a bit too quickly, causing you to take a step back. “Ah…” It’s hard to meet your eyes, what he sees in them he knows is not really there. He shakes his head. “Let’s go back to my place.”

You’re clearly concerned. “What? But we just…”

A pang in his chest leads him to walk past you, not even waiting to hear the rest of your protest. “Wanna go home…” he mumbles. Something in his voice convinces you, as you obediently follow behind him, but he can feel your concerned eyes on his back. His skin shivers under his layers. No… It’s nothing, don’t be concerned.

The walk back to his house allows him to clear his head a bit, but he’s still dissociated, his mind picturing that crest every time he tries to think about something else, his footsteps uncertain as his eyes see a road twisted too much to be the same way he takes home, even if it really is. All this, of course, you remain oblivious to. Because there’s no way he’d let you see him being affected like this.

It’s uncomfortable, the silence that follows when he locks the door behind you two and tosses his keyring onto a hook by the door. It’s uncomfortable, the way you’re looking at him. When you open your mouth, it’s almost a relief compared to the silence, even if your words are not what he wants to deal with right now.

“What happened?” you ask, brow furrowed. “Are you okay?”

He sighs. Taking his time to remove his coat and hat, tossing them both onto the back of a chair, he tries to drag it out so he doesn’t have to answer that just yet. Honesty. He should be honest, because you’re his lover and you’re worried. Because now you can actually pry a little deeper into his issues and he can’t really bring himself to be annoyed by it anymore.

Another sigh. He falls into a chair and you follow suit, taking a seat in front of him. “It’s nothing, I was…” His teeth grind into each other, his mind flashing back to that crest again. “Earlier at the market, I saw… I saw these people. People I hate, I just… I wanted to get out of there. It’s fine now.”

He refuses to meet your eyes while he explains. Idly his rough, gloved hand touches his bare forearm. This is all a level of exposure he really doesn’t want to feel right now, he’s coming to realize. Especially when you reach over, placing a warm, comforting hand on his other arm and he lets you.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Shit. You can see the unease in his body now, too. You can see through him.

Day shakes off your touch, standing up so he’s not sitting stuck with restless energy, so he can turn his back to you and properly reign in his feelings, stop them from shining through in his eyes. He shouldn’t have taken his hat off. Swallowing, his voice returns to the neutral, stoic tone it usually is. “You don’t need to worry about it.”

“Really? Cause you seem kinda shaken up.” The skepticism is clear in your voice. He hears you stand up and his head imperceptibly twitches to the side. His jaw clenches again, pointed canines threatening to grind to a blunt edge. “I don’t understand what’s happening. This isn’t like you. Aren’t they just some people? What’s got you so worked up?”

You didn’t mean it like that, he should know that. You’re just confused and worried, he should know that. Your words aren’t mean to cut, but he…

He turns around so quickly you find yourself stepping back in moment of deja vu. His glare is fierce, his usual stoic features twisting to anger, brow furrowed, lips starting to curl back in a wolfish snarl, flashing dangerous white teeth. “Just some people? Have you no memory of anything? That bitch? The one who ruined me?” His voice is raising above the level it can usually handle. Not made for yelling, the hoarseness of his voice becomes more and more apparent with each question.

Sorry.

Sorry, it’s not your fault. He knows this.

It’s not your fault.

His eyes have never been colder, because rather than filled with nothingness, they’re alight with hatred as his voice drops to a hiss. “Are you always trying to be an asshole or are you just fucking stupid?”

His heart stops cold. His eyes widen, immediately the fire inside extinguished as he hears his own words.

It’s not you. He’s not angry at you. He’s not even angry at those men at the market. He’s angry at the past. But if he fights with the past, he’ll lose. Again.

Oh god, and now you’re staring at him, shocked. Unshed tears glisten in your eyes and his heart twists. He shouldn’t have taken it out on you. Why the fuck did he do that?

He takes a step towards you and you take a step back. He tries to reach towards you and you take another step back. His jaw trembles and his hand falls back to his side as you turn away from him.

No words are exchanged, but the sound that comes from you slamming the door behind you is deafening and says plenty, and he doesn’t follow. He just lets you leave, falling into his chair with his head in his hands.

So many things he shouldn’t have done. More importantly, he shouldn’t have let himself feel anything just by seeing that crest. He’s not as strong as he thought, no, he’s weak. He’s weak, powerless, just like always.

Bodiless voices whisper poison in his ears, reminding him of times past and feelings, both physical and emotional, he’d wished to forget. Skoll and Hati, having watched the spectacle, finally come over to him, claws clicking on the floor in near unison as they move to comfort their master.

Without removing his head from his hands, Day slides from the chair to the floor. A trembling sets in and Skoll and Hati each take a side, pressing up against his body to try and calm him from triggering memories.

But he’s hurt you and everything that’s bubbled up from it, he deserves. He’ll need to apologize later, but he’s in no state for that. He deserves this pain. He deserves every last damned drop filling up his self-destructive body.

Why the fuck is he like this?

#Spoilers #shorts #there's no good ending #you asked for angst and that's what this is #Day #HoF #Honey and Fire #I wrote this in an hour and didn't proofread

[yumeka36]

Detective Pikachu Review

**Note: most of my review is spoiler-free but there are marked spoiler-filled paragraphs towards the end**

So how did this veteran Pokemon fan feel after seeing the very first live-action movie of my most beloved franchise? I was a bit skeptical about it when promotion first started last year – it looked like a standard “buddy cop” detective story that just happened to take place in the Pokemon world, rather than the Pokemon world itself being the main focus (which is something I wanted). The realistic designs of the pokemon themselves were a bit jarring too, but I soon got used to them. I decided to keep my expectations low for the movie, so I wouldn’t be disappointed if it wasn’t good, or I’d be pleasantly surprised if it was.

So now that I’ve seen it, I’m happy to say that I did enjoy it overall. I wouldn’t say it’s great, but definitely good, especially for a Pokemon fan. It was actually a very well constructed mystery, with twists and surprises at the end that I wasn’t able to predict. Probably what I was most grateful for is that the setting of a world where people and pokemon live together was integral to the plot, and the design of Ryme City with its constant imagery of various pokemon mingling around the buildings and streets in their CG debut was a real treat. I felt like a kid again, getting bits of joy as I noticed this and that pokemon making a cameo in the background. This is a common occurrence in the animated Pokemon movies (of which I’ve seen all 21) but seeing them in the “real world” was, of course, special. Now that I’ve gotten over the “shock” of seeing these beloved characters in CG, I think most of their designs look good and I couldn’t have imagined them differently myself. Unfortunately not nearly as many pokemon species appeared in the movie as I’d hoped – out of the current 800+ total pokemon, only about 60 could be seen in this movie, so after a while you start seeing the same background pokemon over and over. I’m not sure if this was intentional or due to limitations, but I wouldn’t say it’s a hindrance. It’s common in the Pokemon games for certain species to be more prevalent in certain regions, so we can say that the same applies to whatever region Ryme City is in.

Other things to note is that the movie did have some nice heartfelt moments too, despite it having a typical “estranged father and son” plot. I didn’t find Ryan Renolds’ performance particularly funny, but at least I didn’t find it bad either. Some scenes that were supposed to be funny or exciting, like the Aipom chase scene and the Mr. Mime interrogation were just kinda “meh” to me. The movie had a nice mix of action, drama, and comedy that meshed well, which is a good thing, even if they didn’t always hit their mark for me.

**SPOILERS BELOW!**

As I said, the mystery part of the plot was interesting, but a few key things didn’t make sense to me (if anyone has thoughts, I’d love to hear). I didn’t understand what Mewtwo was trying to accomplish by “linking” Harry and Pikachu and then wiping Pikachu’s memories. Wouldn’t he be able to find Tim better with his memories intact? And what did Mewtwo need Tim for anyway? I guess to finish what Harry had started, but again, wouldn’t keeping Pikachu’s memories intact be more beneficial? And since Mewtwo is able to telepathically communicate with people, couldn’t he have revealed Howard’s scheme to the authorities on his own instead of waiting and hoping that Pikachu will eventually bring Tim to him?

The nature of Mewtwo’s ability to “link” the minds of people and pokemon was strange too. Using a device like the one Howard used to put his mind into Mewtwo made sense, but then Mewtwo could just straight up put a whole person, mind AND body, into a pokemon if it first inhales the R gas? So what this accomplishes is giving the pokemon the ability to talk to humans, as seen with Harry’s Pikachu? So is this the “people evolving with their pokemon” that Howard envisioned? But the human’s body is gone and only the pokemon’s body remains, so whose mind is controlling it, the human’s or the pokemon’s? In Pikachu’s case, it seems like Pikachu’s mind was in control, but then at the end, it seemed like his voice and personality were like Harry’s. It’s hard to say since we only see Harry for the last few minutes of the movie, but I found it too vague and it just seemed like an anticlimactic result for such a grandiose evil plan. Plus, if Mewtwo was able to merge Harry and Pikachu without any R gas present, what was the point of the gas anyway? It seems to just make pokemon turn vicious, so what if they killed their trainer before Mewtwo could merge them? These are the kinds of discreet plot holes a lot of movies have for the sake of story – if Pikachu didn’t have amnesia, the plot would be resolved too fast, if there was no R gas, they wouldn’t have clues to go by, etc. So even though they affect my overall rating of the movie, I can’t fault them too much as the general public who doesn’t think too hard about what they watch won’t notice (I think too much), and they’re not bad enough to ruin the movie for me, and that’s really what matters.

**END OF SPOILERS**

Like most of the animated Pokemon movies, I originally thought Detective Pikachu would be another one that appeals to fans but couldn’t win over anyone who doesn’t already like Pokemon. Now that I’ve seen it, I think it could definitely pique the interest of someone who’s at least neutral to Pokemon. The movie explains the basics of the Pokemon world but doesn’t delve deeply into things like Pokemon attacks and abilities, so it’s very accessible to open minded non-fans too. To summarize, while it’s no masterpiece, it’s a fun, enjoyable flick for Pokemon fans and anyone else who likes mystery, action, and comedy stories set in a fantasy world. I really hope it ushers in an age for a variety of live-action Pokemon movies in the years to come!

(for further reading, here’s a great article from The Guardian that gives an excellent overview of Pokemon’s history and how Pokemon GO and Detective Pikachu are reviving the franchise)

*Crossposted from my main blog, Yume Dimension*

#detective pikachu #pikachu #pokemon

[kingcygnus]

OK. I know I said that I wouldn't share my negative thoughts but the more I think about s8 the more frustrated and sad I get, that I just need to let it all out. so bear with me.

(I'm on mobile so I can't put on the 'read more')

ALSO MAJOR SPOILERS and as a PSA this is not shipping discourse or even focused on that, even tho I will discuss some of the pairs. it's more on the writing and everything related to it, plot, character story and stuff related to those.

the season started ok. the first episode was ok and I did enjoy those golion/80's voltron references since I used to watch them. but then as it started progressing it just got... bad.

way too rushed, poor character writing, deus ex machinas and bad story telling. also leaving some plot-holes that the only way we can fill is by theories that don't really have much information to ground them in.

let's start with our princess Allura. she was done dirty. not only she felt ooc, the ending they gave her (DEATH) felt rushed and... forced. at first I was glad that allura and lance got together, since it let her have some happiness and also showed lance's character growth. but then, they just killed her. she was all willing to die and no one stopped her (except for coran and lance, and even then eh). and like by the end I was expecting her to appear, bc by all the bs deus ex machina they had showed earlier, I wouldn't have been surprised by this. also, the fact that she kept saying she had lost her family and people and had no one else, while completely ignoring coran, who has always been by her side as a parental figure. it saddens me that they couldn't even say good bye to each other. AND WHILE WE'RE ON THAT: HER DEATH WASN'T EVEN NECESSARY. honerva could have just been "hey, let me repay for my mistakes this way and you can go to continue to bring peace to the universe". but no, gotta add that shock value and sad moment. tl:dr : ALLURA DESERVED BETTER.

now, since we're already on not necessary things. the wedding. the whole epilogue honestly, but let's focus on the wedding. listen dw, I know you were trying to receive your "woke points" by having shiro marrying a dude (whom we didn't know existed or even cared much about him) and saying he found his true happiness and gave up on the battle. like, that's not shiro. at all. not to sound like that fan but, shiro would've married the man of his dreams (or just not married at all) and continued to fight for what he believed in, explore space and just continued to be a pilot. just last season we saw him feeling happy, content, on joining the battle and fighting alongside voltron with atlas. yet you dare tell me that he just left the battle to become a househusband. and since we're on the shiro topic, let's just go all out. what did you do to my man?? if allura felt kinda ooc, then shiro was just,, not shiro,,, he was just,, there. he's a main character, but we just saw him relegated to the background. only moment he kinda came back was during that atlastron battle in which it was the team back together. also, he felt so disconnected towards the other paladins??? like he kept referring them to "paladins" as if they were strangers, compared to before when he would more often call them by their names or "guys" than by "paladins". and even when he was on screen, all we saw him doing was giving orders (except for that clear day episode). there wasn't much to his character this season. and before we change topics, shiro just standing there with a :0 expression while keith was just about to get murdered was so fucking ooc; like back on s2e8 shiro was more than ready to fight the entire bom to save keith, but during this scene he just stood there. awkwardly. doing nothing.

and while we're on shiro and keith. damn it felt truly horrible. let's take off the shipper glasses and look at it from a writing and story telling perspective. a critical perspective. those two had a close bond, they were best friends. keith fucking risked his ass many times to save shiro, even brought him back from the death. he was willing to save him "as many times as it takes" bc that's how much he loves him. he freaking killed sendak for shiro. supported shiro back when he was the paladin of the black lion. got away from the team so shiro, once he came back, could get the chance to fly black again. and in this season, we didn't even saw them interacting but 2 times, and always staying 5 feet apart. where was that friendship and closeness we got a whole garrison flashback for. after this season, all those moments, like haggar saying shiro's bond with keith is the closest and deepest, feel just empty. and like, if dw wanted to add that wedding scene, they could've saved it by having it be keith instead of curtis, you know, a character we had previously seen with a deep connection to shiro, who had a close relationship with. something that actually made sense. like either do it right or just don't do it (they shouldn't have done it). that's just bad (and rushed) writing.

next topic. TOO MANY CHARACTERS OH GOD. there were just too many characters and so little time. yes, it's good to develop new characters so the viewers can sympathize with them more. yes, it's good to have more characters. but not with so little time left. since s7 we were introduced to this new bunch of characters, besides the ones we had already met on the past 6 season. so mix them all up on one whole season, and you just get a mess. bc you either move your plot and underdevelop your characters, or you try too hard to develop them and then slow pace the plot to by the end you realize you're reaching the end, you just rush it all up. it's impossible (or at least very difficult) to balance both these factors in 13 episodes with 23 minutes each. it tires the viewers. having that many characters also causes to forget about other characters that we thought were supposed to be important (matt)

now let's get to the plot holes. listen, sometimes vague writing is good. but it's only good when you're giving the audience something to base their ideas on, and info that they can use and so give them a more solid form. but instead, voltron just drops all this stuff that could've been explored on future seasons, even on this last season, and then just not talks about it anymore like it never happened. and instead just leaves the viewer with more questions than answers. also, making stuff happen just because without any warning or minimal explanation. at the end the lions go. where? idk. why? idk either. are they coming back to the paladins? I. don't. know. it feels just too rushed and like they just wanted to end it for the sake of ending it.

did I mention the deus ex machina?? voltron about to be defeated? spirits of former paladins suddenly can also fight with no explanation whatsoever. voltron loses their quintessence? nope, they just need to believe. voltron about to get killed? atlas comes out of nowhere. the rift about to destabilize? nope, balmeras just appear out of nowhere with no explanation as to how they even got there and how did they know where to arrive and how did they get there so fast. everyone having a breakdown about realities getting destroyed? allura and honerva got that covered by sacrificing their lives (they're literally the goddess-like figures of the show)

this *points to s7-s8* is what happens when you suddenly change your writing team: A Mess.

as a side note: the animation was amazing. the soundtrack was amazing. the battle sequences were amazing. and yea, there were those moments that I did enjoyed from this season, but overall it felt too poor on the writing compared to the previous season which had been amazing. as a I said, this one was made too rushed and with a new writing team, it would've needed a miracle to actually turn out good.

and listen, I wouldn't have been as disappointed as I am if it hadn't been for all those interviews.

yea, we can't blame everything on the vld staff, dw execs are also at fault (deadlines, censorship, etc) since they're the ones at power, but fans are also to blame. two main factors: consumerism and harassment. I don't need to expand on these tbh.

anyways this is my rant on s8. if you read it all, thanks?? maybe I skipped over some other stuff, but these are the things that bothered me the most. specially writing wise.

I just,,, needed to let it out.

#vld s8 #voltron #voltron spoilers #wassi rambles

[tonystarkbingo]

Week Six Roundup

Mod Note: Because of holiday and other real life stuff, Mod Tisfan is a little behind on reading everyone’s fics for this week. So if there’s no note beside your fic, don’t worry, I’ll catch up soon! Promise! I’m so excited at how much work everyone’s done!

Name of Piece Wedding Dress for Sale, Worn Once By Accident by @voodoofee Square Filled continued A3 freesquare Rating M Warnings smut, light dom/sub Summary Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes Bucky finds a strange note in the elevator reading, Wedding dress for sale, worn once by mistake, with the number of someone named Tony. Bucky only knows one Tony but he doesn't think that's the guy’s name. Why else should the packages he sometimes receives be addressed to one A. Edward Stark? Whoever it is, Rebecca's wedding is coming soon and he wanted to buy her a dress. Maybe this one fits? He's pretty sure she won't mind that it has already been worn once... Chapter 8

Name of Piece: What Happens at the Beach House by @tisfan Square Filled A1: Fake Relationship Also on A03 Rating Mature Warnings: fake relationship, blowjob, accidental nudity, there was only one bed, bed sharing, pining, idiots Summary: Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes

“Come on, I need this,” Tony begged. “I know, I know, it’s degrading, and you’re straight, but it’s my mom. She’s not going to stick us in the same room or anything.” Narrator: She did, in fact, stick them in the same room.  

Name of Piece Quantum Realm Travel gone Wrong by @toneestark Square Filled K1 - Crossover Marvel x Marvel Rating teen and up Warnings graphic violence, zombies, hurt/comfort Summary gen

Tony Stark and Hank Pym have a way to reverse all of Thanos' wrong doings, but they need a quick trial to ensure that the technology can work. Winding their way into a worm hole through the quantum realm, they finally make it to an alternate universe and an alternate timeline, only it wasn't quite what they were expecting... 

Name of Piece Giving Him Excitations by @polizwrites Rating Mature Warnings No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Sex Toys, Vibrators, Exhibitionism Square S2 - Vibes in Public. Summary: Tony Stark/Steve Rogers Tony Stark is a sneaky, kinky SOB and Steve kinda loves it; it certainly makes their next team meeting more interesting.

Mod Tisfan’s Commentary slightly different twist on this trope. Hilarious.

Name of Piece Occupational Hazard by @novarain01 Square Filled S5 - occupational hazard Rating Mature Warnings NSFW art fill Summary 

Tony Stark, laying on red bedsheets, wearing skimpy underwear and covered with lipstick, bite marks, rope burn, and a sarcastic grin, looks up at the viewer. 

Mod Tisfan’s Commentary: you can just feeel the smug, here...

Name of Piece The Vague & the Unmistakable by @wakandan-wardog Rating general Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Fluff and Humor, Birthday Fluff, Flirting, Suggestive Themes, Not Beta Read, Not Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Compliant Summary:

Looking back on it, there are several things that should have tipped Steve off that today was his Birthday. (Starting with the fact that it’s suddenly clear Tony engineered every one of them.)  Square Filled: T4: writing format: five things

Name of Piece Soulmates Aren’t Just Lovers by @celtic7irish Rating: Teen  Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: James “Bucky” Barnes/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Forced soulbonding, Imprisonment, Abandonment Issues, winter soldier programming, Bucky Barnes is still in there, Tony Stark is the most stubborn, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Bucky needs a hug, Soulmates, TWS on never happened Summary:

Hydra wants Tony to build them Stark/Chitauri Hybrid weapons. When Tony refuses, they decide that they’ll make him more pliable. By forcing him into a soulbond with the Winter Soldier. After all, his programming should supersede Tony’s stubbornness. Right?

Square T1: Forced Soulbonding 

Mod Tisfan Commentary: Beautiful and riveting. I hit the subscribe button SO FAST. 

Name of Piece Where We Wanna Be by  @rinnwrites Square Filled A1 - Meeting Alternate Universe Counterparts Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: James “Bucky” Barnes/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Multiple Universes Colliding, Meeting Alternate Universe Counterparts, Domesticity, Portals, Inhumans (Marvel), Getting Together, What Could Have Been Summary:

Tony and Bucky stumble through a portal to an alternate universe and they run into themselves, in a world without Avengers….or their enemies.

Name of Piece Always by @ouzoathena11 Rating: General Audiences Additional Tags: How Do I Tag, there’s a book club, and some inside jokes, It’s really not much, just some fun, Tony Stark Bingo 2018 Summary:

Tony bringing Darcy Lewis to Stark Industries brought more than he thought- including a book club!

Square A4- Always

Name of Piece A Place to Call Home by Stark-n-Barnes Square Filled S1 - Holding Hands Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Tony Stark/Stephen Strange Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Established Relationship, Fluff, Neurosurgeon Stephen, Ex-Military Tony, Recovery, House Searching, Moving In Together, Marriage Proposal, Friend Reunions, Realtor Bucky, Holding Hands Summary: Stephen thinks moving in together would be a great idea, Tony disagrees. But can one, beautiful townhome change all that?

Name of Piece Schmoop - @bill-longbow Square Filled K3 - schmoop  Rating: General Audiences Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, James “Bucky” Barnes/Tony Stark,  Additional Tags: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Hopefully not Avengers 4 compliant, Schmoop, Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, ALL THE FLUFF, waking up together, Angst, Not A Happy Ending, Coma Summary:

Tony’s content. There’s no other way to put it. The fighting’s over, the endgame has been played, nothing to fear anymore.

Mod Tisfan Commentary I read this by accident because it’s not very long. Now I am depressed.

Name of Piece Rewards for Good Behavior by @dracusfyre Square Filled R2 Gossip Press Rating explicit Warnings sexual content, jealousy Summary Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes

This is a continuation of my Dark!Tony story Positive Reinforcement (part 1 of Operant Conditioning) though it can be read as a smutty standalone. 

James gets jealous when Tony turns on the charm for his adoring public.

Name of Piece From the Heart that Bleeds by @duckmoles Square Filled A3 - free square Rating gen/preslash Warnings Post Infinity War, possible spoilers Summary

Steve spends his hundredth birthday in Wakanda, still dealing with the fallout of Thanos. He doesn't feel like he's one hundred. He feels like he's one thousand.

(In which Steve and Tony tentatively start to forgive.)

Name of Piece Slack Water, part six: Shoals by Tisfan Square Filled K2: Reunion Also on A03 Rating Mature  Warnings: Consentacles, tentacle sex, marine mating habits, oral sex (sort of? I dunno, Tony’s a fish!) Summary: Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes

Bucky’s never actually been free. While Bucky is discovering what freedom is like, Tony is learning everything his mate likes. Fleeing south, Tony eventually brings Bucky home…

Name of Piece Out of Touch by Mitochondrials Rating: Explicit Square Filled: T3 - Fuck or die Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Brief mention of Jarvis (William), Post-The Ultimates 2, Fuck Or Die, happy birthday steve, Dildos Summary: “I appreciate the sentiment. It’s very touching,” Tony said, and then paused, taking Steve in. “My, my, you’ve really forgotten haven’t you?” He reached to brush a hand along Steve’s cheek, causing Steve to shiver and lean down closer towards him. “You darling, brute of a man. It’s been your birthday going on six hours now. You’ve missed the fireworks? They’ve been going all week.”“I—” Steve blinked. Oh. Tony is suffering the aftereffects of some AIM engineered breeding chemical. Steve, despite his embarrassment, firmly advocates helping.

Mod Tisfan’s Commentary One of my personal favorite tropes, also, I love Ultimates, they’re so... I don’t even know the word, but their relationship is so delicious.

Name of Piece Aberrant Outcomes by @dracusfyre Square Filled K3 - Noncon Rating: Explicit Warnings: Rape/Non-Con Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Steve and Bucky are Not Friends, No actual rape but definitely non-consensual activity, Bucky Barnes's Trigger Words, Groping

Summary: James inadvertently follows Captain Rogers into the jaws of a trap. 

Title: Try, Try Again Collaborator: @27dragons & @tisfan Link: AO3 Square Filled: S3 - Fuck or Die (Tisfan’s Tony Stark Bingo) and T5 - Fuck or Die (27Dragon’s Tony Stark Bingo) Ship: Bucky/Tony Rating: Explicit Major Tags: non-con, sex pollen, hand job, masturbating, coming untouched, fantasy, oral sex, anal sex, violence, kidnapping, hydra trash party adjacent Summary: Madam Hydra’s most successful project was Snowmelt; breeding children from the Winter Soldier. When she returns unexpectedly from the dead, she decides that Tony Stark will be a good donor for a new wave of experiment children. But first, she needs genetic material. And for that, she has a special drug for Tony.

Title: Resolving Dissonance - by @dracusfyre Square Filled: T3: Slave Fic  Ship: Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes Rating general Warning Dark!Tony Summary  President Stark decides its time to reconcile with Captain America. 

edited to fix misattributed fic: From the Heart that Bleeds was erroneously linked to @rinnwrites instead of its proper author, @duckmoles/Kirael. I’d say I don’t know how that happened, but we all know the truth... I made a mistake! Mod Tisfan

#tonystarkbingo2018 #tonystarkbingo #week 6 round up #round up

[pizza-is-my-buziness]

Three Flowers in a Vase

Okay here is yet another Framework AU because I love it and also because SHIELD is back tonight! This fic is based purely on SHIELD speculation and not any actual spoilers because I don’t like to read spoilers so...speculation.

This fic is also based on a deep fear I’ve had since season 2 that Jemma has been brainwashed by Hydra.

Jemma figures it's probably a little bit like looking in the mirror for both of them. Her body isn't her own, not the one that she's grown used to seeing over the past several years. There are scars and bruises, bullet holes on the stomach. Her fingers trace over them the way she's used to doing with Daisy's. Across from her, Daisy flattens down the fabric of her shirt, hiding her own smooth, unblemished skin from view.

At least she doesn't have the memory of the pain that created the scars, though Jemma isn't sure that's necessarily a good thing. Nothing about this body seems to belong to her and she figures she'd be totally lost, untethered, if not for the person standing across from her.

Daisy's hair is long and she's still wearing the Hydra emblem that almost got her shot on sight. The familiar faces that Jemma has around her are familiar only in appearance; nothing else about them connects back to what she's known before. But at least she's around Bobbi again and Trip, however temporarily.

"That matches up with the information we've had," Bobbi agrees with a nod, ignoring the way Jemma can't help but study the scars she didn't earn. "After you were shot," she indicates the scars on Jemma's chest, "we weren't sure that you were going to pull through. We didn't bother to correct the misinformation that was spread."

Jemma finally lowers her tank top, hiding the scars and bruises. She lifts her head, looking past Daisy and catching sight of her reflection in the mirror across from her. She's all angles and hardness, her eyes sharp and steely. It's different from how she didn't recognize herself after coming back from Maveth. Now she truly understands what it's like to be looking at a stranger.

Bobbi is eyeing Daisy carefully and Jemma can see her hand inching with controlled slowness toward the firearm at her waist. "Are you sure you trust her?"

"Yes," Jemma says sharply and she's pleased that her worry for Daisy translates to authority. "Stand down."

Bobbi does. Jemma could get used to this, though she wishes the reality was different.

"Daisy is a double agent," Jemma tells Bobbi and Trip and Piper, waiting in the doorway of the office that had been Coulson's in another universe. Now it appears to be hers, though it's sparsely decorated and lacks any sort of personal touch. It looks like it belongs to a military tactician not a biochemist. "She's been infiltrating Hydra and gathering pertinent information."

Piper and Trip exchange dubious glances and Trip does little to hide his skepticism. Instead, he looks at Daisy, lifting an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

Daisy lifts her chin and Jemma doesn't have to wonder about why she curls her hands into fists. "Yes," she says evenly. "My loyalties are to…" She hesitates, uncertain about how to finish. Does SHIELD exist in this world? "Jemma."

"So it's like that, huh?" Trip actually grins, shaking his head. "Well, girl, don't make us guess: what have you found out?"

The information Daisy supplies lets Jemma know that the long hours that have stretched between them have been full for Daisy; she's been behind enemy lines, with the people they've long since considered their enemy. And, worse, those they never have before.

"One thing I don't understand," Bobbi says when Daisy assures them that she can get them into the Hydra facility she's been to, "is why we're just now hearing about this. I didn't know we had someone on our side working on the inside. Why are we just now getting this information."

Jemma narrows her eyes, feeling a flare of frustration spread through her. It's the opposite of how she wants to be feeling right now but it's the first emotion that's managed to crack through the barrage she's been feeling. None of this is fair. She opened her eyes and woke up in this Hell and found herself face to face with the friends that she still misses every day like they've been physically carved out of her. To save the team, to get out of this Framework, will mean to lose them again. But what other choice does she have? It makes her feel brittle, ready to snap. "Because it wasn't for you to know." Jemma can't stop the words from cracking past her lips and her shoulders seem to straighten on their own, this new and strange body filling the leadership role even if Jemma still hasn't gotten used to it. "Her cover had to be maintained."

Bobbi says nothing but her body language signals that she's yielding the topic. "We have the information," Jemma continues, looking from Bobbi to Daisy and the others. "Now we need to act on it."

Her gaze lingers on Daisy's and Daisy nods almost imperceptibly. They might have been dropped into this reality where Hydra has taken over and Jemma is somehow the leader of the small rebel faction trying to wrest that power away from the many heads of the mythical beast. But this reality doesn't matter. Only their team does and that has to be their priority.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It seems, in some small way at least, that SHIELD does exist in this world. It's evident in the fact that they're still in the base, that some of the gear and files still boast the familiar eagle and that one of the Koenigs -Jemma still isn't sure which one- is there among the other familiar-unfamiliar faces. And the weapons Jemma definitely recognizes. The gun fits comfortably in her hands, a solid connection to the reality they'd left behind and Jemma has no idea when holding a firearm would become a security blanket.

Daisy is standing beside her, checking the rounds in the chamber. Satisfied, she tucks it into the waistband of her jeans, hidden by the tail of her shirt. There's another weapon at her hip and the sight brings a wry smile to Jemma's lips. "I can see you're going prepared."

"Just in case," Daisy mutters, tapping the hilt of the gun. "One of these might have a particular target."

Jemma reaches for her, resting her hand on her hip. "This will all be over soon," she says softly and it sounds like a promise even though neither of them believe it. "He'll be gone again. Dead."

Daisy purses her lips. "Good."

They move away at the sound of footsteps, though Piper looks like she doesn't notice. "Ready, ma'am?"

Jemma nods, stepping away from Daisy and toward the door. They follow Piper through the warren of hallways, the path second-nature. "You know," Daisy says quietly, leaning closer to Jemma as they walk, "this whole thing is kinda hot. Jemma Simmons: boss-ass bitch."

Jemma rolls her eyes. Though she can't resist the urge to look at Daisy, lifting her eyebrows. "I guess you just haven't been paying attention. I'm always like this."

Daisy grins and the sight is enough to make her forget where they are and what they're about to do, however briefly.

The moment passes when they rejoin Bobbi and Trip and the others. "Remember," Jemma says, shaking off the Daisy-induced thoughts in her mind. "Melinda May is not to be harmed. We need her."

Bobbi scoffs. "Right. Of course we need Miss Hydra herself." She rolls her eyes. "And why, exactly, do we need her?"

Jemma and Daisy exchange a look. "She's high up in the hierarchy of Hydra," Daisy says. "She'll have valuable information."

Trip shakes his head. "You'll never break her."

Daisy flexes her hands, more out of habit than anything else. She's already told Jemma that her powers don't work here but she can't seem to shake the impulse to control them. "Leave that to me."

The vague threat -made without backing- seems to do the trick. There's no more conversation about May as they prepare to leave the base.

There's no more conversation about much of anything as they leave the hideout and move toward the Hydra facility. Jemma tries to focus on slowing her breathing, listening to the sound of it as it moves through her lungs and out her nose. The car bumps and jostles her along a road she can't see and her knee is pressing into Daisy's, the touch absent and necessary. Daisy puts her hand on Jemma's thigh and she lets herself enjoy the pressure, just for a moment.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Inside the Hydra facility it smells like metal and blood and sulfur. They'd managed to catch the soldiers inside by surprise, which Jemma figures is to blame for why she feels like they have the upper hand. Not that she knows how the rest of her ragtag team is doing; she has Daisy by her side but the others are gone, having disappeared into the bowels of the building to cut off as many heads as possible. Jemma figures it's probably better like this; if they can just get May then they can leave, leaving the SHIELD base and the rebels behind. Leaving Bobbi and Trip behind. It'll be easier that way.

Daisy is a step in front of her, moving through the hallways with her gun leading the way, her muscles taunt. They come to a doorway at the end of the hall and Daisy tries the knob before motioning for Jemma to step back. "Powers would really come in handy right about now," Daisy gripes with an eyeroll before kicking in the door, making short work of it powers or no.

The room appears to be a laboratory of some kind and the bitter, iron smell only grows stronger here. Jemma grits her teeth against the chemical tang and how it mingles with the smell of old blood. She steps closer to Daisy, taking in their surroundings: the operating tables, the instruments waiting, shiny, on the counters. Daisy clinches her jaw. "This must be where they're operating on the Inhumans."

"Bravo, Agent Skye."

The voice is one Jemma recognizes. It's one that she hears sometimes in her nightmares, one that haunts her for so many different reasons. She has to swallow around the bitter and hot taste of bile in her throat. She turns toward the voice, heart thudding in her chest. Sunil Bakshi. She wonders if he can see the way that her hands are suddenly shaking.

Daisy narrows her eyes and she, too, lifts her weapon. Bakshi's eyes widen, almost comically. "I'm hurt, Agent Skye." He puts a hand to his chest. "I thought we were on the same side."

"Not in this reality," Daisy assures him. "Or any other one. Trust me."

Bakshi scoffs. "Trust you? Hardly. I can't say I was ever taken with your…charms. Not like Agent Ward," he says. "It'll be a pleasure to inform him that his little pet is working with the enemy." His eyes flick toward Jemma.

There's no look of recognition there, not from Bakshi at least. All Jemma can do is stare into the face of the man that she killed.

"I'm sure May will feel quite vindicated, when I tell her," Bakshi continues. "She never trusted you."

Daisy's finger hesitates near the trigger of her gun. "Sorry," she says flatly. "You won't be telling anyone anything."

Again the comic widening of the eyes. Jemma can see it clearly on Bakshi's face: he's enjoying this. There's not an ounce of fear staring back at them. "You're going to shoot me?" He shakes his head. "I think not."

Daisy gives him the once over. He's unarmed and unconcerned. "And you're going to stop me…how?"

Bakshi only shakes his head, moving closer, casually so, letting his fingers drag along the edges of one of the operating tables. Jemma can only watch him, heart hammering, mouth dry. She wants to do something, wants to will her body into action. But the only thing she can remember is the ravenous and predatory way Bakshi had looked at her when she was undercover with Hydra, how he'd made it clear that he wanted to hurt her and slowly. That he wanted to sink his claws in her and that he would enjoy every second of taking her apart piece by piece. All she can remember is realizing that she'd missed, that she'd lost the splinter bomb, that she'd just killed a man.

"May was right to talk about safe-guards; she was right to take precautions," Bakshi says as he looks at Daisy. "How will your rebel friends feel to learn that, no matter what, you'll always belong to Hydra."

Daisy's scowl looks more like a snarl. "Never." The word sounds like a growl.

Bakshi lifts his head. "Take a deep breath."

Daisy furrows her brow. "Huh?"

Jemma blinks and she feels something shifting around in her mind, coming loose, waking up.

"Calm your mind."

Her mind is buzzing and she can feel the vibrations spreading through her bones and muscles, down to her toes.

"You know what is best."

Daisy jabs her gun at Bakshi. "Okay, what the hell are you talking about?"

Jemma can feel an odd warmth flowing through her, calming her. Her muscles feel loose, almost like her mind.

"What is best is you comply."

Right, exactly. Jemma knows this somewhere deep inside and it feels good to know, to be certain of something, to feel a weight lifted off her and given to someone else. To Bakshi. To let him tell her what's best.

"Compliance will be rewarded."

The pieces in her mind suddenly click into place and that tired, always so tired, feeling is gone. Jemma just feels empty, strangely free.

"I am happy to comply." The words slip past her lips easily and Jemma means them. She's ready.

Daisy and Bakshi are both looking at her with the same flabbergasted expression. Bakshi is looking at her with a growing sense of confusion, Daisy with a growing sense of horror.

"Interesting…" Bakshi's confusion is steadily turning to understanding, a sly smile spreading across his face. "This is interesting."

Jemma feels a tightness in her chest, a desperation for what he might say next, what she can do for him.

But it's Daisy who reacts first. She pulls the gun from the waistband of her jeans and pulls the trigger.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

When Jemma opens her eyes, she feels like her brain is trying to pound its way out of her skull. It's a very unpleasant feeling.

Equally unpleasant is the realization that she's laying on the thin, lumpy mattress in one of the holding cells in the bottom of the base. She can see the mold on the bricks, feel the chill in the air. But none of it makes sense; she knows where she is but not where…in what reality…and why…

Jemma turns her head and there's Daisy, sitting in a chair by the door and Jemma gets the impression that she's trying to keep others out, not Jemma in. There's a bruise on her cheek and her lip is split and still she smiles. "Hey."

"Daisy…" Jemma sits up slowly, pressing a hand to the side of her head to keep her brains where they belong. "What happened to your face?"

"Oh this?" Daisy waves a dismissive hand. "Bobbi and Trip weren't exactly thrilled to find you on the floor and me with a gun in my hand…took some explaining."

Jemma's forehead creases. She remembers the gun, she remembers Daisy pointing it at her. And she remembers… "Bakshi."

Daisy gets up from her chair, walking over toward the bed. Jemma ignores her, wrapping her arms around her knees. "We took him into custody. We couldn't find May but…"

Jemma only shakes her head. "Leave," she says softly.

Of course Daisy doesn't move. "We'll try again. We still have time to find-"

"Daisy, please leave," Jemma says shortly, louder this time. She looks up, meeting her gaze. "I'm not safe to be around."

Daisy actually looks confused. "What are you talking about?"

Jemma scoffs. "You were there." She turns away. "I've always wondered…somehow I've always known…I've felt it inside…"

"Brainwashing," Daisy says flatly, like it has nothing to do with them.

"Programming." Jemma grits her teeth against the word, clenching her jaw. "All this time…"

Daisy puts a hand on her shoulder. "Jemma, don't," she says quietly. "Don't do this to yourself. It's not your fault. You went undercover to help SHIELD, to help all of us. What they did to you…it doesn't matter. It's not you."

Jemma shakes her head. It is her, it's a part of her whether she'd been aware of it or not. She looks back at Daisy. "Bakshi," she says and his name sits heavy in her mouth, like the memory of the chemical and blood smell in the lab. "I killed him."

There's nothing in Daisy's eyes: no flicker of surprise or disgust. Nothing but the steady understanding that suddenly makes Jemma want to scream and hit the wall. "I know."

Jemma opens her mouth but can't seem to find the words that she wants to say. Not that she knows what she wants to say. Not that she thinks there's anything to say.

Daisy takes her hand, holding onto her tightly. "I put the pieces together. It doesn't matter, Jemma…I mean, it does. It does matter. But now…" She shakes her head, brow knitting. "You can't feel bad about it. He hurt a lot of people…he hurt you…those nightmares…"

Jemma shakes her head and Daisy stops, falling silently. "I don't know what to do, Daisy," she says quietly and she doesn't resist when Daisy pulls her closer, putting an arm around her. "I don't know how to help you."

"What do you mean?" Daisy looks at her. "We have a plan. We're in this together."

"I'm a time bomb…a Hydra weapon." Jemma closes her eyes. "If they get the chance, they'll just activate my programming again and who knows what I'll do…"

The idea of being in Bakshi's control or, worse, Ward's is enough to make her stomach turn and the sensation of swallowing down bile return. If Ward ever got his hooks into her mind she can only hope that Daisy would have the sense to use a different gun.

"Hey, that's not going to happen, okay?" Daisy takes Jemma's face in her hands, meeting her gaze. "I won't let it and neither will you. We're going to get out of this place, with our team. And we're going to do it together. Because they aren't in charge here, we are."

Jemma shakes her head but she doesn't move away. "You make it sound so easy."

"Because I can be a near-sighted idiot," Daisy says breezily. "And because I trust you. I know you. You're still you. You've always been you. They can't change that."

Jemma is embarrassed by the prick of tears. She wants so badly for Daisy's words to be true but she can't shake the doubt, the hurt, the distrust in herself. She can't push aside the violation she feels knowing what's been done to her.

But even more, she can't lose Daisy, can't leave her. "Together or not at all." She can barely hear herself but she knows that Daisy can.

Daisy nods slowly, kissing her softly. "Together."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Outside the Framework, Jemma can still feel the words in the back of her mind. It's impossible to shake, this knowledge that her mind is not completely her own. They'd known that Hydra's brainwashing techniques could be implemented without the subject's knowledge, she'd just never realized the irony of that understanding before.

Jemma lets out a slow breath, trying to center herself.

Take a deep breath.

Jemma closes her eyes, focusing on Bakshi's face in her memories. The one that she sees in her nightmares, the predatory animal wanting only to hurt her.

Calm your mind.

Jemma exhales between her teeth, tightening her hands into fists.

You know what is best.

She hits out at the bag swinging in front of her, hard enough and without the proper form to send a jolt of pain through her arms.

What is best is you comply.

The bag swings back and she hits it again. She's lacking form and technique but that's not what she's here for.

Compliance will be rewarded.

"You're going to hurt yourself."

Jemma jumps, startled. May is standing in the doorway and still the sight of her, the real her, is nearly enough to make Jemma feel better about everything.

Well, not everything. But it's a start.

"May-"

"It's late," May says, stepping into the gym. She takes in Jemma's posture, the swinging bag. "You're going to break your hand if you keep punching like that. I know Daisy has been working on posture with you."

Jemma nods, feeling chastised. "I know. I…"

May only nods. "You wanted it to hurt." It's not a question so Jemma doesn't answer. May steps up, holding a hand on the bag to stop the pendulum motion. "What are you doing in here, Simmons? You should be resting."

Jemma can't help the slightly defiant look that flashes across her face. "So should you."

May only looks amused. "Is this about Hydra? Bakshi?" She questions. "The brainwashing?"

She'd told the team of course. It had felt like a confession almost, the way she'd hoped that they would absolve her of this. But when they had, it hadn't made her feel any better. Daisy hadn't made her feel any better. Hitting the bag hadn't made her feel any better either.

"I feel…" Jemma shakes her head, trying to knock loose the word she's looking for. "Used. Dirty. What have I done that I don't remember-"

"Don't," May says shortly and when Daisy had said the word it had been an entreaty. When May says it, it's a command. "Don't do that yourself. You're still you: a good agent and a good person. Someone I trust with my life. And I don't say that to everyone."

Jemma feels like the only thing she's been doing lately is shaking her head. "You shouldn't trust me."

"Actions speak louder than words, Jemma," May says and the Framework stretches between them, the things that May had done there, that Jemma and Daisy had saved her from. That Jemma had saved her from. "It might always be a part of you but it isn't you."

Jemma doesn't say anything but she likes the certainty in May's voice.

"Go to sleep," May says gently, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Rest. In the morning, have Daisy help you with your technique."

She's teasing her and it makes Jemma smile, however slightly. "Good night, May," she says softly, heading for the door.

May doesn't say anything but Jemma can feel May's eyes on her as she leaves the gym.

Daisy is still asleep, resting on her back, one arm flung over her eyes. Jemma watches her, the slight smile still in place. The only sound in the room is the steady whisper of Daisy's breathing.

Jemma slips into bed beside her and Daisy doesn't wake up even as she moves her arm from its position across her face to rest against Jemma's waist. Jemma can still hear the voice in the back of her mind, she can still feel it there, implanted. But it's quieter now, easier to mute. And she sleeps.

#skimmons #bioquake #Framework AU #Dollhouse references #well in the title only