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#this is messy and all over the place
kazzattack · 2 months
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make-up sex with Dick has been rotting in my mind lately :P
make up sex w/ ex bf!dick grayson… bc if i’ve noticed anything about him? he’s besties with all of his exes. like. every single one of them. he’d try to be particularly close with you because he’s not over you at all. still thinking about you 24/7, still wants to see you, definitely still wants to fuck you, all that good stuff. what’s pissing him off is that you’re sick of him. and because i’m you’re petty, you decide against blocking him just to let him know you’re choosing to see him and ignore him. you read all his stupid ass messages, he can still see your posts, and he knows you’re doing shit to piss him off. because nothing irks his soul more than being ignored, much less ignored by you. luckily enough, nothing’s stopping him from knocking on your door after texting you that he’s “coming back for his hoodie.” because duh, you kept all of those too.
you open the door against your better judgement and it’s obvious he has a few intentions once you get a good look at the flimsy tank top and sweats. “hi,” he smiles to hide the impatience in his voice.
“hi,” you respond with condescension and move to close the door in his face.
“you’re being a dick,” the smile easily fades as he catches the door with a quick hand, “just let me in.”
and against your better judgement, you do.
now he’s snooping around, and quite effectively, finding a way to dig through drawers and piles of clothes even though he’s spotted a hoodie or two out the corner of his eye. come to think of it, he’s interrogating you. asking you about that party from friday, that one guy he saw on your story, anything he can get. hell, he’ll go as far as to flash you a new pair of panties while he’s looking, asking who’re you getting all pretty for? now you’re irritated too, not giving him any of the invasive answers he’s looking for. you two go back and forth for god knows how long, all the way until he’s got you against a wall and muttering fuck you under your breath, followed by a clever remark of I thought you’d never ask.
finally, his hands are back on you. he can finally grab a hold of your face and get his tongue back down your throat after a long ass month of nothing. nothing like you, at least. “you’re such a little shit,” he groans and you laugh at him, letting him wrestle your legs around his torso and carry you to the bed. as if you could have fought against it anyway. he’s depraved of you, already groping your tits and ass after grinding his thigh into your clothed cunt. it’s almost as if he hasn’t fucked since the last time he had you. still feeling a little cruel, you tease, “those other girls just didn’t do it for you, huh?”
“there weren’t any other girls.”
“yeah right,” you force out a giggle to ignore the guilt.
“I’m serious. been waiting on you to cut the bullshit so I could fuck this cunt again.” his hand’s already eased under the waistband of your shorts to circle your clit and you moan right into his ear. “don’t need any other girl when i’ve got a whore right here, just for me, right?”
he sucks a hickey into the underside of your breast before flipping you over, seemingly back to his regular self. you’re easily repositioned face down and ass up, helping him pull your shorts all the way down. fuck, you missed him. the way he palms your ass and forces you against his cock, debating on whether he should really fuck you or just hump you til you’re begging for his cock and he’s coming in his boxers.
“already fucking me back,” he moans from behind you and it’s brought to your attention that you’re the one grinding on his dick through fabric. you can’t bring yourself to be ashamed of it though, keening when the next time you feel him there’s no barrier between you and the tip of his cock is slipping into your pussy. normally he’d be all sensual, rub at your cunt til it’s all messy and leaking before fucking you, but this time around it’s like he has no time for it. he’d rather force the arch in your back further into the mattress and fuck you full, have you whine into the pillows and beg for more of his cum like he knows you want to.
“still want me to get out?” he’s muttering into your ear after pulling your hair, knowing by now you’re too fucked out to give him some smart-ass remark. all you can give him are those whorish moans he hasn’t heard for so long as you cum on his cock for the third time. he’s skipped the theatrics he loves to fuck you deep and give you a good reminder that this is what you broke up with.
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quirkle2 · 1 month
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a labor of love about milk. there are other things too i guess
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henryvell · 3 months
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the viscera haver herself
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seance · 2 months
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THE MUSKETEERS 10TH ANNIVERSARY REWATCH / fave episodes [1/?] ↳ SEASON 1, EPISODE 3 / commodities (x,x)
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cookiiemancer · 5 months
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@fieldofleurs and I's discords pins are pinned with gold like this
GITM belongs to @venomous-qwille
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pupkashi · 8 months
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satoru is SHIT at flirting and i know it
like he could easily make people swoon when he doesn’t try but the second he decides ‘yeah i have feeling for u’ all his game goes down the drain
he uses stupid pick up lines and stuff on u but always manages to mess them up so they never actually work
“satoru where are you? shoko said the meeting was at 5:30” you asked, phone pressed to you cheek as you continued to look for the sorcerer.
“sorry I’m just lost” he pauses, a smile on his face, his confidence through the roof as he open his mouth again, “lost in those eyes of yours.”
silence.
“satoru we are on the phone”
he is absolutely mortified and debates on just completely giving up, but it’s when he’s unaware of his actions and just being himself that he finds you staring at him a bit longer, giggling at his words and blushing.
satoru is shit at flirting, but god is he a natural fucking charmer
he’s holding the door open for you, offering to walk you home, listening to you talk, watching your favorite shows with you and remembering your favorite things. he picks flowers for you and gives them to you, pays for your lunch anytime you guys are together, he’s always making you laugh and giggle even when he’s feeling like shit.
he’s the kind of guy to always brush hands with you when you’re walking next to each other, he’s holding your things for you, texting you and sending you things you’d find funny or that remind him of you, complimenting you constantly but not in a weird way
he’s the kind of bad flirting that hears you mention you like something and then he’s like “oh me too!” without missing a beat but he’s actually never consumed a single piece of media of the thing ur talking about and spends all night learning abt it in case you ever bring it up again
he once asked you if you could help him study before an exam and when he realized that you knew much less than him he ended up teaching you. he was sure his luck had ran out and he had fumbled extremely hard.
“toru! i passed!” you grinned, holding the paper in front of his face. the 90 written in red ink in the top right corner made his lips curl into a smile, grinning right back at you.
“i told you that you’d do great! I’m proud of you” he smiles, not expecting your arms to be thrown around his neck, squealing softly as you pull him into a hug.
you’re only giving him half a second to process what’s happening when your lips find his cheek, your heart racing and you’re hoping that shoko really did know gojo as much as she claimed to.
satoru is stunned, his face is red and his ears are burning and he should probably close his mouth or actually say something before all his efforts are washed away.
“haha cool” is all he stutters out, he’s cringing insanely hard and subtly pinching himself when you’re staring up at him with nervous eyes.
“yeah cool,” you mumble, already turning on your heel read to lock yourself in your room when he’s grabbing your wrist and pulling you into his chest.
“can i kiss you?” he whispers, your faces mere inches apart, your small nod is all he needs before he’s crashing his lips onto yours, smiling into the kiss because holy shit i fucking made it.
when he’s pulling away from you he has this silly little grin on his face, clearing his throat before finally speaking up.
“I’m really glad you passed” he says, you can’t help but want to tear your hair out, what happened to the satoru that could make any girl swoon?
it’s not until after the two of you start dating that he’s back to normal, using every pick up line in the book (correctly this time) and making your blush like it was his job. he’d make you stutter and roll your eyes, so naturally flirting with you.
you would always make fun of him and ask where this was when he was crushing on you, he’d only get extremely red and start pouting, saying he was just too embarrassed because he thought you’d reject him.
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a/n: hi hi back w a silly little drabble :P i don’t really like this much but i really wanted to post something so i hope it’s okay !! i think it’s sweet and silly hehe,, requests are open so feel free to drop something :3
taglist (send an ask to be added!) : @chilichopsticks @anime-for-the-sleepless @4sat0ruu @safaia-47 @nanamikentoseyebags @fushironi @nineooooo @the-mom-friend-dot-com @gojoshooter @sat6ru @luna0713hunter @torusmochi
masterlist
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mattodore · 2 months
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theo’s bedroom is slowly coming together
#river dipping#theodore doe#echthroi#ts4#ts4 edit#after the save broke yesterday morning for the fourth! time i finally pulled up mod manager and started looking through the hundreds of#conflicts i apparently had and also deleted well over 500+ duplicates... my mods folder is SO rancid i'm sure i missed some conflicts#bc see those dark blue pillows on theo's bed? those are actually white :) but for some reason when i move the pillows near the wall they#change color depending on the time of day... it's not just those pillows some other objects do it too... just closing my eyes at it <3#the bed and desk are where theo spends most of his time so i spent forever on them. his bed needed to be overwhelmed by stuff#there are... ten pillows i believe two large covers a sheet and a blanket. theo kind of just... burrows into the center and hides.#bunny boy behavior........ and yeah those are matthias's gloves on theo's desk <3#i have to recolor the stuff on theo's walls later. i imagine his walls are mostly empty and it's just the floors in his apt. that're messy#but i wanted sticky notes to help him remember things and that back wall is going to have matthias's art and love letters#<- which theo definitely takes down and hides whenever matthias actually comes over lmaoooo#also i finally moved all of the pins from theo and matthias's boards over to @theodoredoe (mattodore was taken 😞)#i wanted a place just for my oc boards and i also wanted to be able to add sections to each oc's boards so! new acc!#yk how i mentioned theo's board looking so cluttered? yeah so. figured out it's bc over half of his board is just quotes#i made a section and threw all the 200+ quotes in there and will slowly put some of them in his main board#his board just looks so much better now like i'm so happy about it 🥰 it was definitely worth the time#OH ALSO!!!! IF ANYONE HAS SOME DEAD PLANT CC PLEASEEEE SEND IT MY WAY!!!!#theo really loves just. ripping plants and flowers out of the ground and taking them home to put in little pots but. he always kills them#jsknndkhj so i need dead plants!! limp!! DEAD!!!!#but i seriously can't find any#anyway... that's my build update <3 fr not much has happened bc i've had to start over four :) separate :) times :) but it's getting there.#i miss mattodore tho...... gkhjndfkhjn so i might take a break and get some poses and an edit going soon
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galakteon · 2 months
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some wonderful fellow asked me to draw miloradovich awhile ago, but the ask dissapeared in my inbox ahh😭☹️ either way! he’s one of my favorite generals and i’ve drawn him multiple times,,,, just haven’t shared them around online💕
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rough sketchy drawing w/ hat and without)
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pseudopigeons · 9 days
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kobylu but make it yuri
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raplinenthusiasts · 1 year
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🎤 next song is dedicated to @jeongtokkie
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prizmaticjewel · 3 months
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this is my first time actually trying to render so Plz be nice... i drew the internet angel girl herself :33
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kyouka-supremacy · 10 months
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The very opening in BEAST and the implications of The Heartless Cur about Akutagawa constantly stuck in a dissociated state as a child in the slums does incomprehensible levels of damage to my brain. Living in a state where you're always starving, always fighting for scraps, being beaten by adults, waking up next to dead friends, having to maim or potentially kill at such an early age, escaping from traffickers so often, etc. are all so horrific that it's no wonder why he was called a child without emotions. Having to experience the grief, pain, and terror as it comes and goes in his situation would be a kind of hell that would be impossible to survive. Part of his brain probably shut itself off to avoid any more pain and distress. I have so many thoughts about it. There is something extremely heartbreaking about how despite living completely dissociated from his emotions, and possibly pain --to the point that he stared off into empty space while being beaten, or couldn't even express enjoyment at warm meals-- his priority had always been taking care of and protecting Gin and his friends. The one panels where he (gently, i have to mention) holds his friend that had frozen to death in their sleep, and him cutting a man's arm off for harming his friends imply that he either had the responsibility or took it upon himself to deal with the difficult and dangerous stuff. I am in the trenches losing the idgaf war
Akutagawa, upon feeling rage and hatred for the first time, thinks, "I've gained the ability to feel. Therefore, I'm no longer a heartless cur." Implies that he probably didn't see himself as anymore human than anybody other adult, which, considering that is all he had been called, he probably internalized. His friends were capable of smiling and experiencing joy with each other and also capable of experiencing sadness too. Did he ever look at his friends having fun and think something was wrong with him to be unable to feel anything or express it if he did? How did he feel looking at his sister--his other half, the most important person - while trying his best to take care of her and be the best for her while not being all there? How does it affect him now? So many questions and I'm going insane about it. Sorry for dumping this onto you but I needed a victim
Anon, have mercy on me
I think that Gin is such an important part of Ryuunosuke's character exactly for that. It is impossible to transcend from it– if you forget about her, you're just failing to comprehend Ryuunosuke. Gin is literally the only factor that keeps Ryuunosuke human. We see him lash out and we see him howl and we see him being beaten up and we see him act with not an ounce of reason; for most of the story, we see nothing of Ryuunosuke but a rabid animal. But I think the moment he shows to truly care about Gin, that's the moment the reader starts perceiving him as human, as well as the moment we start feeling sympathy for him. Unexpectedly and unpredictably, he shows a side of him that isn't violent and bestial, a side of him that is caring, that is loving towards a family member, something that is easy to relate to; then, even him can be human. Even in the slums, even when everything else of him seems numb and detached and heartless, he still cared for his family first. He still made flowers with his ability and retaliated against anyone who mistreated his siblings. When one of his friends got hurt, he carried them on his back. When a dog killed his friend, he mercilessly slaughtered all the dogs in the vicinity. What's that, if not the only way someone who never knew anything but violence and pain has left to express love?
Of course Ryuunosuke had internalized his being not human, of course he believes that. Of course he's the first who considers himself a dog. But that's what makes Ryuunosuke's character development so meaningful, isn't it? Isn't that true that it wouldn't result as impactful if such a strong ability to hate and such a strong ability to love didn't come from a place of true incapacity to feel? It is, alright, a simplistic perspective, but Ryuunosuke's story really is the succession of quests that have him gain emotions, and with every new one he becomes a little more human, till he's reached the fulfillment of his being. Maybe love really is the ultimate thing that makes us human.
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dollypopup · 21 days
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y'all can all cancel me (again) for this, but if there's even a SHRED of 'who should I pick?' from Penelope in season 3, I am tuning out SO fast because like. . .sorry not sorry, there IS no choice. Debling is some crusty OC suitor she barely even knows and Colin is a man who she has been so supposedly in love with to the point where she'd ruin her entire family's reputation to have a potential love story with him. Penelope and Colin have background, years of knowing each other, intimacy that few people in the Ton can boast of having (letters, conversations about purpose, fights and arguments and makeups) and her and Debling have. . .a dance or two at a ball because he's a rebound for Penelope's broken heart. he means nothing. he has no nuance, he has no weight to the story, he is such an afterthought to me. either I wanna see Penelope going 'you know what? I don't even LIKE this dude. he's. . .fine, but I don't care about him even a shred as much as I care about Colin' or the INSTANT Colin's like 'you know what? we should get married' if it's not an immediate 'say less, you're already my husband, try returning me without the receipt, Debling whomst?' then I don't want it!
like. . .it's just so frustrating to see all the 'I hope Debling sweeps her off her feet and she rejects Colin's proposal and she makes him work for it and and and-' nonsense from the fandom and it's always tagged and no matter how many times I block it, it just keeps popping up. I go into the Polin tag for POLIN. I don't give a SHIT about a male love interest other than Colin. Not one. Not a shred. Not an iota.
and also. . .Debling has the 'benefit' of not having depth, or character traits, or HISTORY, so peeps can project onto him however they want, but I'm calling it now, there is NOTHING he could do or be that would make me like him more than Colin. Colin will always hit different, and I will always love him more. and if Pen's not on that same page? lol bye
you want me to believe Penelope and Colin are soulmates and it's romance for her to hem and haw about how difficult a decision it is for her to marry a stranger who knows barely anything about her. . .
when Marina was out here dropping banger lines like 'You were the only man with which I could see myself being happy' and 'I do not care about any of these men, where is Colin?'? like hello??? and she wasn't even fully in love with him!!!! but we'll demonize her until the cows come home in our fandom and make her the villain in Polin's love story for DARING to get in between Polin, yet Debling, a white man, is a darling dear perfect prince for getting in between Polin? existing in our fandom solely so Penelope can be like 'lol, Colin ain't shit, let me entertain any and everyone else'?
if that's the direction it goes then, ten toes down and on my mama, she doesn't deserve Colin and she can move because I'm on my way to court him my damn self
and that's that on that
#you know what? lol it's been a bit since i've posted a controversial opinion#tagging it#polin#sorry not sorry i ship polin. . .so i wanna see. . .polin. . .and i'm getting damn sick and tired#of all the bullshit pen/oc pen/other dude theories and stories in the polin tag#and i don't want polin to lose screentime over a frankly bleh male oc#you can't change my mind#if i don't see at least marina's 'you've seen him with the little bridgertons!' level of squee and 'i only want to talk to colin'#levels of devotion then i don't fucking WANT IT!!!!!#yeah definitely try out the marriage market#realize that NO ONE has a good time on the marriage market#try to get over him w/ whomstever#but then be like 'i don't even LIKE this dude where's colin i miss him' about it!!!!!#because otherwise i am not here#i am asleep#and i am courting colin in your place pen#i'm coming for your man#anti debling#if debling has 100 haters i am one of them if he has 10 haters i'm one of them if he has 1 hater i am the hater if he has 0 haters i'm dead#it's incredibly obvious that 'pebling' is half rooted in a revenge storyline fueled by anger at Colin and his complexity#and half a projection of wanting Penelope to have 'choices' because she is a representation and manifestation of the fans themselves#and so people think an OC that can be 'perfect' for them- whoops I mean Pen (because he doesn't have any real depth or interest)#he's a cardboard cutout we can throw whatever you want onto#so we can make him 'perfect' instead of the much more meaningful storyline of pen and colin both being messy and loving each other more#and part of it is bitterness over Polin not being insta-love#which. . .if it was i wouldn't like them as much as i do#anyways y'all ain't slick#and it's fucking WEIRD to be in a fandom that's like 'i ship this couple but i hope she gets with ANYONE else'#maybe you. . .don't ship the couple??#like. . .to the point of wanting her necklace to be from debling. . .and her wearing it everywhere??? WHAT??
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misstrashchan · 1 year
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"This must be really hard on her too"
That line... has been forever stuck on a loop in my head ever since I first heard it. That it's the last thing they say, that they take away about Ruby as a person in that scene. Especially while watching V9, and just how much everything has been weighing down on Ruby, and her tendency to repress her negative emotions and refuse to take time to let herself feel them and reflect is now being unpacked and examined much closer as the Ever After functions in such a way that she will literally get nowhere unless she looks inside herself, this scene has again been swimming to the surface of my mind, and it's just something I feel like revisiting.
(also it's rg white day today so, I'm legally allowed to be insufferable about Them, though this is in part relevant to V9 in regards to Ruby)
Most other people who have met and know Ruby just kind of accept that she is who she is, or very quickly come to. She's The Hero. The Leader. The Spark Of Hope Everyone is Inspired By. We rarely see her talk about her personal feelings and motivations, and it's never really called into question besides being touched upon briefly in her first meeting with Ozpin and Blake in the first volume about why she wants to be a huntress:
Ozpin: And what is an adorable girl such as yourself doing at a school designed to train warriors?
Ruby: Well... I want to be a Huntress.
Ozpin: You want to slay monsters?
Ruby: Yeah! I only have two more years of training left at Signal! And then I'm going to apply to Beacon! You see, my sister's starting there this year, and she's trying to become a Huntress, and I'm trying to become a Huntress 'cause I wanna help people. My parents always taught us to help others, so I thought, Hey, I might as well make a career out of it!
(1x01)
Ruby: I love books. Yang used to read to me every night before bed. Stories of heroes and monsters... They're one of the reasons I want to be a Huntress!
Blake: And why is that? Hoping you'll live happily ever after?
Ruby: Well, I'm hoping we all will. As a girl, I wanted to be just like those heroes in the books... Someone who fought for what was right, and protected people who couldn't protect themselves!
Blake: That's... very ambitious for a child. Unfortunately, the real world isn't the same as a fairy tale.
Ruby: Well, that's why we're here! To make it better.
(1x03)
...With further insight from Yang at times:
Yang: I'm not like Ruby, she's always wanted to be a Huntress. It's like she said, ever since she was a kid, she'd dreamt about being the heroes in the books. Helping people and saving the day, and never asking for anything else in return.
(2x10)
But rarely do we see Ruby open up about herself as an individual and her struggles, and even rarer still is the occasion someone prompts her too.
And so it's always stuck out to me that in 5x05 she gets asked the questions that... no one else has really asked her before.
"How do you handle all of this?"
"How can you be so confident?"
"How are you okay with any of this?"
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In the Dojo scene (5x05) when we see Oscar pick up on Ruby trying to hide how sad she is (after being reminded of Penny's death) while trying to encourage Oscar, we see her recompose herself, interrupt Oscar when he starts to ask a question after noticing her sullen expression, and then she tries to leave, excusing herself awkwardly.
"Well, see you upstairs"
(very subtle Ruby) but before she can do so, Oscar finds he has to ask:
"How do you handle all of this?"
A question she initially doesn't... actually answer. She very deliberately avoids talking about herself, her own feelings, and how she's been handling all this. Instead she focuses on reassuring Oscar at first, saying what she thinks will make him feel better after hearing him elaborate, confiding in her about how afraid and overwhelmed he is by his current situation.
"I'm... scared. I'm more scared than I've ever been in my life, than I ever thought was possible. I always knew that I wanted to be more than a farmhand, but this?"
"...Who would ask for this?"
Oscar didn't really have a choice in being pulled into the war with Salem and becoming a huntsman, he was reluctantly pulled into it by Ozpin. WBY and JNR decide to join the fight because they're inspired by Ruby and following her as a leader.
...So why does Ruby willingly ask and choose to be a huntress? Why did she freely leave home? Why would she choose to risk her life in this fight against Salem and to take on the responsibility of saving the world? (It certainly doesn't feel like a coincidence that these questions are being revisited in one way or another in V9)
Ruby gives him a very generalised answer in response to his question at first that talks about everyone as a group, and leaves out talking about herself as an individual specifically:
"We all went to Beacon because we wanted to help people"
"None of us chose this either"
"We just have to press on"
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And you can see Oscar's expression growing more frustrated as he's facing away from Ruby, because that's not an answer to the question he actually asked. Because he asked about how Ruby as an individual is handling all of this. Ruby genuinely wants to reassure Oscar, but to him it comes across as insincere, like she's putting up a facade, especially since he saw only a moment ago that she was on the verge of tears and clearly upset about something, so he knows she's not being honest about how she's feeling when Oscar asks her how she's handling all of this.
And so he snaps and pushes back:
"How can you be so confident? People have tried to kill you, the world's about to go to war all over again, how are you okay with any of this?!"
(*glances at the v8 finale and v9* boi howdy those words sure do have a different weight to them now huh)
And while realising he may have been too harsh or blunt and later apologizes, it actually does succeed in getting Ruby to reflect a little and confide in him what she'd been through at the FoB and her losing Pyrrha and Penny, her own doubts and fears about the fight with Salem, and how it had shaped her resolve moving forward.
"When Beacon fell, I lost two of my friends: Penny Polendina and Pyrrha Nikos. I didn't know them for very long, but that doesn't change the fact that they were two of the most kind-hearted people I have ever met. But that didn't save them. Pyrrha thought that if there was even the smallest chance of helping someone, then it was a chance worth taking. And because of that, she died fighting a battle she knew she couldn't win. And Penny... was killed... just to make a statement."
"I am scared! But not just for me. What happened at Beacon shows that Salem doesn't care if you're standing against her or not. She'll kill anybody. And that, scares me most of all. Pyrrha... Penny... I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt. That I didn't think about them everyday since I lost them. That I didn't wish I had spent more time with them. If it had been me instead, I know they would have kept fighting too. No matter how dangerous it was. So that's what I choose to do. To keep moving forward."
And again, what stands out to me is that the last thing Oscar takes away from his conversation with Ruby in the Dojo isn't... how inspiring she is or his admiration and respect for her (though he very clearly has that too, "she must've been one of the best huntresses at beacon!"). The last thing he says in this scene, the last thing he takes away is instead this:
"This must be really hard on her too."
The more time that passes through the series and seeing Ruby slowly put under more and more pressure, and stretching herself thinner over time, (like her semblance evolves so she can break herself down to carry others in V8, and in V9 her friends have been shrunk down and she is the one responsible for carrying her team on her shoulders) to help others and save everyone and yet still fail and lose those close to her, and having to just keep trying, keep moving forward no matter what, never stopping or slowing down even if there is no clear end she can see is heartbreaking and exhausting.
And it just makes rewatching the Dojo scene hit even harder. Because yes Oscar! It really is hard on her too! And it was so damn satisfying to have someone see and acknowledge that as well as admiring her and being inspired by her. Being moved by both her strength of character AND her vulnerability. And so it's noteworthy that Oscar is the one who does this, and who pushed her to open up, even just a little, about her grief over the FoB and fears about the fight with Salem.
Especially considering the visual framing of Ruby opening up to Oscar about what she's been through while standing in an open door frame exposed to the outside cementing that as the purpose of the scene: (she is literally opening up to him)
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And the fact that Oscar has a kind of a different response from when we've usually seen Ruby comfort, reassure and inspire someone before. Usually it causes them to reflect on themselves and their own struggles, (like with Blake, Jaune, Penny and Qrow) not also on hers as well.
Even with those she has a mutual sense of understanding and solidarity with, like Blake (because of their ideals) and Jaune (because of both of them sharing the responsibility of being leaders) the way they comfort and uplift her in turn when they see her doubting herself is often a double edged sword.
Jaune: You didn't drag us out here. You gave us the courage to follow you.
(4x10)
Blake: I know you don't always know what to do, but that's never stopped you from doing something. I've always looked up to you Ruby.
(8x08)
Yang and Qrow also do this, and it comes with the additional punch of comparing Ruby to Summer as an ideal she strives to be:
Yang: Mom took a risk the day she left, and I don’t think. I don’t think it went the way she wanted it to. But she’s still my hero.
(8x11)
(Summer was Yang's hero, and now Ruby is too, so she has to try to live up to that)
Ruby: This says I'm a Huntress now. But I don't feel like I know much more than I did at Beacon.
Qrow: That feeling never goes away. Your mom, Summer, would be proud of you.
Ruby: What do you think she would've done if she learned the truth about Salem? That she can't be destroyed.
Qrow: Pressed on, I think. Like you. She was always the best of us.
(7x04)
(if Summer would've pressed on, then Ruby has to keep doing that too. If she was the best, then Ruby has to be the best.)
Because, and I want to make this clear, I think Ruby appreciates and is greatful for how much they believe in her and look up to her, and it absolutely does inspire her to keep moving forward, to stand up and fight even when she's doubting herself. But it also... unintentionally places more pressure on her to try and live up to those expectations, and it deprives her of an equal, of someone to relate to and help share her burden instead of upholding her on a pedestal and having unwavering faith in her as the smaller soul everyone looks to. To bottle up her negative feelings because well, everyone believes in her as this optimistic leader who is this endless source of hope and inspiration to everyone around her, and everyone needs her to Keep Being That, and that's more important, right? She can't let them down, right?
"It's up to you to make things better, isn't it? Everything all depends on you! Your sister needs you, your friends need you. The whole world needs you to keep fighting forever and ever against an invincible monster that took your mother!"
(9x04)
Ironically, this (in part) comes back to the person who reinforced this flawed mentality in Ruby in the first place. Ozpin.
"But if you aren't always performing at your best, what reason do you give others to follow you?"
(1x10)
This was genuinely good advice for Ruby's situation at the time in V1 after her conflict with Weiss, to take her role as leader more seriously, and well intentioned I'm sure. But in the long run? Ruby has been basing her self worth on how much she can give or do for others. On being that perfect leader.
Ruby feels like she constantly needs to be a pillar of strength and support for everyone around her as a the ever-cheerful and inspiring leader, that she has to prioritize them over herself, and if she lets herself admit how much she's hurting or how scared she is, she'd be afraid of those around her losing faith. What reason would they have to follow her if she failed them like that? Thus as a result, she struggles allowing herself to open up about her own feelings and to rely on others for emotional support. And as we've starting seeing recently, bottles it up until she reaches breaking point.
Another element to consider, and there might be an earlier or more obvious indication of this, but I started to notice it in V2 when she's visibly the most depressed and worried about Blake's behaviour as she's spiralling and overworking herself, saying the party is pointless if they can't get Blake to go.
"Date or no date, none of this will matter if we can't get Blake to go."
(2x05)
Yang and Weiss are also both concerned for Blake's wellbeing, but they're also excited about the dance for themselves, (Yang talking about what dress she's going to wear, Weiss about her date, what decorations they should have, etc.) which we see when they're planning the party. For Ruby, the only point of the dance is to cheer Blake up, to get her to relax.
"What's the point? Who cares about the dance if Blake isn't going?"
(2x06)
But then Yang convinces Blake she needs to take time for herself and relax, and when Blake shows up at the party, afterwards Ruby is... then completely stumped when she no longer has someone to worry over, and ironically struggles to relax or enjoy herself at the party like everyone else.
Blake neglected her physical needs to push herself, while Ruby appears to neglect her own emotional needs. She focuses on other people's problems and struggles, concerns herself with their wellbeing and happiness, and we don't really see her think about her own. It's admirable how much she's dedicated to being a huntress, but unlike the rest of her team, she doesn't really have anything outside of that that she wants for herself. Her entire sense of self completely revolves around being a huntress.
Ozpin: Well, you can't spend your whole life on the battlefield, even if you may want to.
Ruby: (crossing her arms, looking annoyed) Yeah, that lesson's been floating around a lot lately.
Ozpin: (staring out at the dancing couples) If you think about it, fighting and dancing aren't so different. Two partners interlocked, although one wrong move on the ballroom merely leads to a swollen foot.
(2x07)
This is said while looking out on the dancing couples and comparing dancing to fighting, aka, romantic foreshadowing, which I've talked about in more detail here
(also hey thanks Oz for giving Ruby some good advice to follow the piece you gave her about being a leader in the previous volume)
It's also interesting how this is in the same volume Oobleck questions Weiss, Blake and Yang's motives for being huntresses, and later on during the campfire scene we see them each open up about their own doubts and affirming their resolve to one another, but Ruby is completely excluded from this. Instead we are given insight about Ruby from Yang's perspective, but not from Ruby herself. Because everyone assumes, even her sister, that she is the simple soul, the pure hearted hero, and therefore has no doubts or deeper reason for what she does. When in actual fact, both are true, as we start to see in the Dojo scene.
And when she allows herself to confide in Oscar about her own experiences and losses, to admit that she is scared, it actually helps in this situation. Opening up is what allows her to relate to Oscar's own fears and let her words reach him. To reflect on what she'd been through and reaffirm her own resolve. And a mutual sense of understanding in each other and their fears is established. And this makes sense, after all, allowing yourself to be vulnerable and being more honest about your more negative emotions (being sad/afraid/frustrated) leads to empathising with others and understanding them better. And Oscar goes on to do this in future volumes in trying to empathize and be vulnerable and honest with others, which for better (in Emerald, Hazel and Ozpin's case) or worse (in Ironwood's case) is always worth trying to do, because if you don't then no one can understand and reach out to each other, and nothing will truly change. Which I firmly believe is something Ruby needs to learn more in regards to her Silver Eyes and how she uses them.
Ruby has pushed Oscar to be braver and more confident in himself, (like Ruby) while Oscar has pushed Ruby to be more introspective and honest about her own feelings (like Oscar). Which is the part of both character's struggles, Oscar in overcoming his fears and Ruby in dealing with her own feelings.
There's even a callback to this scene in the V7 finale when the song "Until the End" which is a Ruby song, is playing. As Yang is asking JNR where Oscar is, the exact lyrics that play when Oscar is mentioned are:
"The tears that you've shed,
May find a tree to water,
But only when you're stronger"
Literally the words "tree" and "Oscar" overlap here.
During the Dojo scene when Ruby opens up about the hardships and losses she's endured, and the fears she still has, but also her resolve to keep moving forward, we see her wiping away her tears and reassuring Oscar, whose surname is Pine, a type of tree, like the one being referred to in Ruby's song, a tree that she's watered and helped "grow" metaphorically speaking, as a person, who is moved by her both her strength and her vulnerability. (yes yes I know it's Extremely Corny but the symbolism is Still There)
This could also mean in context of V9 and the Ever After tree that once Ruby is able to properly break down and cry, to grieve and embrace her pain, to be a rose that blooms in the rain that opens up to her team and herself, that she will be able to move forward to the tree and find her way back home.
It's also playing into her allusion as the Rose from the Little Prince as well, as she tries to face away from Oscar and quickly wipes away her tears:
“She did not want him to see her crying. She was such a proud flower…”
And it doesn't just stop there either.
In V6, after telling JNR about Jinn, Oz and Salem, we see how angry and disheartened they all are:
Jaune: "Everything we did was for nothing!"
Blake: "That's not true..."
Nora: "Really? Cos' it sure does sound like it!"
Blake: "I... um..."
Ren: "If Salem can't be killed, then how are we supposed to win this?"
Jaune: "Wow... Great plan, everyone."
After Jaune's outburst, we see Oscar look up over to Ruby, as if he's expecting her to say something uplifting or encouraging, because that's usually what Ruby does at times like this, right? But then he sees her downcast expression, and all of a sudden you see Oscar look back down as he realises that Ruby isn't going to speak up, because she's taking Jaune's critiscism the hardest out of all of them. And it settles in for him how much this is weighing down on her, because she's the leader, because she's always the one expected to have a plan or to know what to say, because she feels like she has a responsibility to live up to that image for all of them.
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That this must be really hard on her too.
And we know this to be true when we later hear her confide in Maria:
"What am I supposed to tell Jaune and his team when we don't even have a plan?"
"I feel like I'm letting everyone down"
Before, Oz was considered the "Leader" of their whole group. But Oscar's trust in Ruby outweighed Oz's fear, which was why he fought for control against Oz and told Ruby how to use Jinn, because he believed and trusted in her more as a leader. And by entrusting her with that knowledge, gave her the means to make her own choice of what was right, and ultimately challenge and remove Oz from a position of leadership. And in v6 as Ruby has that role instead, she feels more responsible for their group, for their mission, than ever before, and in turn, in this scene here, Oscar feels responsible for Ruby and the burden they share.
(it's almost like Ruby and Oscar both share Oz as a foil and they're supposed to be better than him and learn from his mistakes which in turn inspires him to be better.)
"There is a rose... and I believe she has tamed me..."
“But you must not forget it. You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed. You are responsible for your rose...”
(the Little Prince)
And that's the reason why Oscar chooses to try to speak up in this moment to try and direct the attention on to himself instead, trying to defuse the tension of the situation after seeing how Ruby is struggling. Interesting is how he isn't moved to action by seeking inspiration and strength from Ruby alone as others are, but also finds the courage in himself to overcome his own fear and hesitation in a need to support her, in an attempt to alleviate the burden he sees weighing down on her.
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Because she shouldn't have to always be seen and believed as the one who bears it. Not alone. Because no one should.
Gosh, it's not like one of Oscar's allusions is the Little Prince who learnt that the Rose was his responsibility to go back and take care of right?
*gestures at how Oscar ran away after his confrontation with Jaune and just so happened to come back wearing combat gear that is a very obvious nod to the Little Prince, as well as taking inspiration from Ruby's Mistral outfit and incorporating her red as his secondary colour, focused on Ruby's reaction, and how Ruby is literally referred to as "the Rose" by Tyrian in v4 and has a semblance that has her burst into rose petals*
Or the boy from the Warrior in the Woods who felt that someone should take care of the Warrior for a change, the way she had for everyone else for so long?
“You’ve spent all these years looking after us. I thought maybe it would be nice if someone looked after you for a change. Because that’s what I can do. Because no one else will"
(The Warrior in the Wood, Fairytales of Remnant)
No no, of course not, that's totally crazy.
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aeroblossom · 6 months
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rene de petrichor is such a guy that i need to dissect. this small town boy from poisson that suffered the violence of a siege, being adopted by a man he couldn't trust, and having to live the life of a child genius. it's imperative that we think of the effects growing up in the narzissenkreuz institute would've had, especially at a time like the cataclysm. from his notes in sumeru you only get the image of a quiet, unassuming boy who's burdened with a task that potentially spells the fate of his people, and possibly the entire world. he couldn't return if he failed. he also had the life of jakob in his hands, and carter too.
the potioneer mentioned in the world quest 'villains' is likely rene, too. this young boy from a small town is behind nearly everything in fontaine, and it's crazy to think about.
in my interpretation, as a child, he was likely quiet and analytic, burdened by shouldering the responsibility of saving lives. he grew up to be rather eccentric, likely a bit full of himself due to his achievements in sumeru ( -- wq 'villains'), and as he reached adulthood and discovered what the truth was meant to be... must have felt a mix of hopelessness and hopefulness at the same time. burdened with knowledge only he could know and no one could understand but him. but he couldn't sit around, he had to do something. he's very furina/erinnyes (who are probably the same entity) in that way. living knowing something that they can't confide in others because they wouldn't understand.
his actions, despite the good intentions, are not seen as good. and as a friend of mine pointed out, though he and the others grew up listening to stories of heroes and dragons, he didn't realize the moment he went from being the hero that would save fontaine to the dragon that would have to be slain. that is, narzissenkreuz.
one of genshin's best npcs ever, if i'm honest. i really hope we get a face reveal soon. i would love if he was playable...
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jimmyclueless · 27 days
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how i like to think tango works hehe
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