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hannyoontify · 10 months

Text

lessen your burden - choi seungcheol

member | seungcheol x gn!reader

genre | angst, js hurt no comfort, breakup!au (i apologize in advance)

word count | 1.2k

synopsis | seungcheol loved you more than anything, but when he learns that you no longer feel the same way, he's still a little reluctant to let you go.

warnings | cursing, seungcheol is extremely emotionally codependent/unstable, reader is a bit of a dick (i think), arguing, reader loses their shit

notes | to be completely honest, i can't tell who's the "bad guy" here bc this is loosely based on true events from yours truly 💀 tag yourself i'm [name]

''i'm sorry. i'm sorry that i'm such a shitty boyfriend and i'm sorry that i keep having these bad thoughts about us and-'

'seungcheol, what are you saying right now?' you asked, a hint of sleep still laced in your voice. it's only been 3 minutes since you woke up and your boyfriend was sitting in bed next to you with tears in his eyes as he apologized profusely for absolutely nothing. you wondered if this was his fourth or fifth time crying to you this week.

'i'm sorry, i'm so sorry. i don't know what else to say, i feel like i should be apologizing right now, but i don't know. i'm sorry. i'm stressed and today just isn't a good day' he rambled on, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

'seungcheol, what the fuck are you talking about? it's only been 5 minutes since we woke up, what do you mean it's not a good day' you said. you would be lying if you said that you weren't slightly agitated by this whole situation because this wasn't what you wanted to hear first thing in the morning.

you noticed seungcheol flinch at your choice of words and you ran a hand against your tired face. 'sorry, i didn't mean to curse'

to say that you and seungcheol's relationship had been tense recently would be an understatement. with your upcoming performance test and potential promotion at work, you were stressed and under a lot of pressure to do well. seungcheol was also job hunting after he was let go from his previous company that was financially struggling. every day, he sat at his computer as he sent out resume after resume and only left your apartment to drink with his friends or for interviews which never ended well.

the two of you had been getting into more arguments as well. it first started out small; bickering when you found a miscellaneous sock on the floor when you got home that soon transitioned to screaming matches every other night. but now, you were both too tired for that as well. you knew, eventually, that you two would break up. it was inevitable.

it wasn't that seungcheol was a bad person or a bad partner, you were simply incompatible with him. that, and you also fell out of love with him at some point and grew tired of your relationship with him. it seemed like all you ever did was give, but you received almost nothing.

'can you please hold me?' seungcheol asked in a quiet voice. a small, exasperated sigh left your lips before you could register what you were doing. once you did, you tried to cover it up by rustling the duvet loudly and motioned for your upset boyfriend to come closer to you.

but seungcheol noticed. he always did. he noticed the way you slightly rolled your eyes whenever he came up to you on the verge of tears. he noticed that every night, you seemed to inch further and further away from him until you were on the edge of the bed, threatening to fall off the mattress. he always tried to brush it off, making up lame excuses for your distant behavior, but now, it was getting harder for him to think of excuses.

pressing his head against your chest, seungcheol listened to your soft heartbeat as you absentmindedly ran your fingers through his hair.

'cheol, we should break up' you quietly said. seungcheol pulled away from your embrace and looked straight ahead. he couldn't look at you. he wouldn't.

'why?' oh he knew why. seungcheol knew why but he still wanted to hear it coming from your mouth–

'i don't love you anymore'

–he takes it back. he takes it all back. he never wants to hear those words coming out of your mouth ever again, it felt like a punch to his gut. seungcheol suddenly couldn't breathe.

'[name], you don't- you don't mean that. please. i need you to comfort me right now, tell me that everything is going to be okay. you can't leave me, not when i'm at my lowest point like this'

you silently slid out of your bed and put on your bathrobe, facing your back towards him. 'i'm sorry, seungcheol. i don't know if i can do this anymore. i'm tired. doesn't my lack of effort make you feel unloved? like you deserve better?'

your boyfriend–almost ex–shook his head profusely. 'no, you're perfect for me. please don't leave me [name]'

'begging isn't gonna get you anywhere, choi seungcheol'

hearing his full name coming from your lips made seungcheol's blood run cold. you only called him by his full name when you were on the verge of lashing out at him and against his better judgement, he apologized again. 'i'm sorry, [name]. if you tell me what i did wrong, i'll fix it and-'

you whipped around. for the first time that day, seungcheol saw your eyes though now he wishes he never had. your usual shining eyes were void of any love and joy that used to be there. instead, they were dark and stormy. full of anger and scorn.

'when is the last time you've comforted me, seungcheol? you go on and on about how you need me and you need to be comforted by me. think about it. when's the last time, you've held me in your arms and told me those 5 words that you want to hear all the time?' once the floodgates had opened, there was no turning back.

seungcheol sat there, stunned as you continued to berate him. what you were saying wasn't wrong. he had been so focused on trying to make himself feel better, he never bothered asking you what was on your mind. he wondered how often your words 'it's going to be okay' were actually meant for you instead of him.

'when i wasn't chosen for the promotion last month, where were you? you were out, drinking with your friends until 2 in the fucking morning'

'i don't understand why you're so obsessed with the promotion, you're still young and you have plenty of time-'

'I DID IT FOR YOU, SEUNGCHEOL. I DID IT FOR US' in the end, you had exploded. 'EVERYONE'S ON MY ASS 24/7 ASKING ME WHEN I'M GONNA GET MARRIED. HOW CAN I GET MARRIED WHEN MY BOYFRIEND IS UNEMPLOYED AND MY PAYCHECK CAN BARELY SUPPORT US BOTH?!'

you took a deep breath, not realizing until now that you were crying. there were tears streaming down your cheeks, similar to seungcheol. taking a moment to collect yourself, you rubbed at your eyes, trying to stop your flowing tears.

'everyday, i get yelled at and scolded by my seniors. i'm currently doing the workload of two people, do you remember me telling you that?'

seungcheol felt a pang of guilt in his chest. he did remember and watching you breakdown like this left him in horror–

'and then i come home, to my apartment that i pay for. and the dishes are still in the sink. the laundry isn't folded. did you expect me to do all the housework as well?'

–was he really this much of a burden to you?–

'i'm tired of this, seungcheol. please. i'm tired of giving and not receiving anything in return' although you stopped crying, your eyes were glistening with tears as you looked at him desperately.

–if that's what you really wanted, he would give it to you–

'i'll be out of here by the end of this week'

–because he still loved you.

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demetriandelibinaryboyfriends · 3 years

Note

Any hc for (non)binary brothers

You mean like...headcanons for their relationship/Demetri and Eli in general? Sure, I’ll take a stab at this! I have a bunch of miscellaneous headcanons for them anyways and have been looking for a place to put them, may as well post them here.

Fair warning that this is a bit of a disorganized mishmash of stuff I’ve thought up for them myself, headcanons I’ve seen others in the fandom make for them, and tropes that I’ve seen in fanfic that I really liked, so I kinda stole them to add to my own personal headcanon XD I may not be able to source all of them if asked...some of them I’m like “I genuinely don’t remember where I saw that, but I HELLA liked it” lol

~Demetri is like...RIDICULOUSLY good at coding. Eli is good at it too, but Demetri basically singlehandedly carried that coding competition they won. It was really more of a 70-30 effort, but Demetri consistently gives Eli 50% of the credit to try and help him feel good about himself and his capabilities. Demetri knows he did a bit more work than Eli, but he’s never once brought it up and he doesn’t plan to.

~Demetri looooooves cats. Like...the pretentiousness? The heightened sense of self-importance? The way they’re kinda misunderstood and often disliked because they can be mean, and don’t always show affection in the way people expect? The general air of annoyance and disdain they give off??? Demetri’s just like “yep, this is my animal right here.” XD Demetri doesn’t DISLIKE dogs, but he finds they can be a bit much sometimes, and likes that cats do their own thing a lot of the time.

~After getting the Hawk moniker, Eli lowkey got SUPER into hawks and birds of prey in general. Like he started watching documentaries on them and everything, and gushing to Demetri about how badass he thought they were. It even kinda verges into special interest territory (since Hawk/Eli is canonically probably autistic), although it’s not as all-consuming as some of his other ones. Back when he and Demetri are still on good terms, in the early days of “Hawk,” Eli rambles to Demetri about hawks and other “badass” birds a LOT when they’re hanging out. Eli only does this when he’s alone with Demetri because he’s a little scared to show THAT level of enthusiasm to anyone else, considering he’s trying to be a “tough guy” now. Demetri he still feels he can essentially be all of himself with, though. Demetri finds this new raptor obsession kind of hilarious but also kind of endearing.

~Demetri has a single mom who is lowkey overprotective and ends up coddling and sheltering him a lot. Demetri’s dad left when he was little, and his mom can be a bit overbearing because Dem is all she has left of his dad, in a sense. Because of this, Demetri definitely did NOT tell his mom Eli was the one who broke his arm. He said it was “some goon” from Cobra Kai, and said Eli wasn’t even there among the group that day. He knew if his mom knew Eli broke his arm, she would NEVER let Eli near him again, and would probably get a restraining order and possibly press charges. And Demetri just...REFUSES to give up on Eli, even after everything. He figures Kreese’s brainwashing and Kyler being in Cobra Kai are already putting Eli through a special kind of hell, and he wants to protect him from having even MORE things to deal with--in this case, the wrath of Demetri’s mom. And she never finds out Eli broke his arm--Demetri takes it to the grave.

~A little while after the Christmas party, Demetri and Eli resume their weekly sleepovers and try to make up for lost time. They decide not to pull out Eli’s Waterbed from storage, considering they both have pretty unpleasant associations with the waterbed after the incident at Moon’s party. They end up just sharing Demetri’s bed, like they used to when they were little and it wasn’t “weird” yet for two boys to sleep in the same bed. Maybe it’s weird now, but they figure as long as Demetri’s mom doesn’t blab to their friends or something that they’re sharing a bed, then it’s cool. Neither has any issue at all with sharing a bed, although they caaaaaan’t quite put their finger on why that is XD

~Eli actually gets nightmares about the laser tag arm incident more often than Demetri does. The fight will play out in a thousand different ways, but it always ends the same--with Eli pinning Demetri down and snapping his arm. Worse, sometimes he’ll have dreams that he’s beating up Brucks again, and then Brucks will slowly morph into Demetri, but Eli won’t be able to stop punching. He frequently wakes up panicking and screaming and crying during his and Demetri’s sleepovers, and Demetri just holds him and sooths him and wipes his tears off and reassures him that he knows Eli’s never going to hurt him again.

~I actually imagine it’s on a night like one of these that they first get together--Eli wakes up from another nightmare, and Demetri is just hugging him really close and trying to reassure him, and at some point, Demetri just...impulsively leans in and kisses him. They both get super flustered for a second, and then Eli leans in and kisses Demetri super fiercely and before they know it, they’re making out like there’s no tomorrow. When they have to stop for breath, they admit they’ve always liked each other and just weren’t really sure how to say it. They spoon for the rest of the night, and are pretty much officially dating after that, although they’re kinda anxious about what people will think, so they keep it on the DL at first.

~Demetri has bad dreams too, but his are usually current--e.g. Eli reveals it was All An Act and he’s been spying for Cobra Kai, and doesn’t actually give a shit about Demetri. When Demetri wakes up from these at their sleepovers, he often can’t help but shake Eli awake, and rattle off a bunch of paranoid questions--”You actually like me, right? You actually wanted to be friends again, right? You don’t think I’m annoying? You don’t secretly hate me, after everything?” And this always kind of alarms Eli at first, because of how...out-of-character it is for Demetri to be that self-conscious about what people think about him, and for him to actally...well...care if people think he’s annoying XD But after a little bit Eli just puts his hand on Demetri’s shoulders and says “Demetri, I promise I want you back in my life.” And this is usually enough to calm Demetri down, because he knows it’s genuine, just like Eli’s apology at the Christmas party was.

~Eli is really, really terrified of hurting Demetri again. Sometimes Eli gets panic attacks when he and Demetri are sparring and he hits Demetri a little too hard. Demetri’s kind of come up with a “signal” for Daniel to indicate he and Eli need to take a break. Once Daniel figures out the situation, he’s more than happy to oblige. Demetri always helps Eli through his panic attacks and reassures him that he trusts him with his life now, no matter what happened before.

~When Johnny finds out about this, he’s actually...way more understanding than anyone expects him to be, because Kreese traumatized him when he was young, too. He just kind of sighs like “Yeah, Kreese made me do some fucked up shit too, back in the day. He’s a bastard like that. You take a 10 whenever the hell you need, Hawk.” And honestly? Demetri lowkey loves Johnny for this. This may be the turning point that finally causes Demetri to view Johnny Lawrence with something other than mild to moderate disdain XD

~Demetri often makes a point of kissing Eli’s scar and telling him he thinks it’s beautiful. Hella corny, I know, but god knows Eli needs it. He kisses it in front of their friends, too, as kind of a way to reassure Eli “hey, I’m proud to be with you in your entirety, and I’m not at all ashamed of that aspect of you, even if you still are.” Eli definitely appreciates this, but he pretends he’s embarrassed by it and will often fall into a blushing, flustered mess when Demetri kisses his scar XD

I think that’s all I’ve got for now!!! I’ll post more later if I think of them!!!

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make-me-imagine · 2 years

Note

Hiya! Congrats on 7k! If I'm not too late, I'd like to request a ship for the celebration. (If I'm too late you can ignore, I totally understand!)

I'm a 31 year old bisexual woman. Slytherin, ESTP, Taurus. My main love language for expressing it is gift giving. For receiving, it's quality time. I'm a movie buff and enjoy going both going to the theater and watching at home. I also enjoy writing when I can, some miscellaneous crafting things, and singing. I'll give almost anything a try, but I also know my own limits. I love trying new foods (even if the combo sounds gross.) If it's edible, I'll try it. I prefer nighttime and if I had the choice, I'd sleep during the day and be up late. I love animals of all kinds; insects, reptiles, basically all of them. I've kinda become a jack of all trades type as I like to do a lot of things, but I don't have the patience to become really good at them. I also have the, "I'm not immediately a master at this, I give up" thing. I'm always ready to throw down on behalf of others (legit almost fist fought a cab driver once bc he wouldn't leave this poor girl alone.) I stick up for myself as well, ofc. I'm outspoken and will just... do things. I care very little about how others view me. It's very difficult for me to get embarassed. I can be pretty loud. I'm the friend that people tag in cursed memes. I'm into that nerd scene; anime, manga, video games, etc. I legitimately listen to all types of music as well. My friends had to to keep me from eating a pizza I found in the box on a windowsill downtown. I've been told I'm both intimidating and that I look very innocent so tbh I have no idea which I give off more. Physically I'm kinda tall (5'7,) thique, and pale. I don't care much about how someone I'm interested in looks. I've got all sorts of types and there's not much consistency. I believe in ghosts and aliens, and used to be big into ghost hunting media. I've I've two separate PeeWee Herman dolls. One of them talks. I'm kinda like a human shitpost at times. I'll do almost anything for a bit. I'm kinda rambling but I feel like I'm telling you a lot about me with these rambles. I can be pretty stubborn - especially about going to the Dr. I accidentally swallowed some Drain-O once and just... went about my day. (I'm aware I'm a dumbass and follow a strict do as I say not as I do guideline for everybody.) I give really good advice despite all of that. I also have surprisingly good manners. I hold the door open for everyone, say thank you about a million times during a transaction, etc. I do the thing where you don't realize something is traumatic until you tell the story and other people are like omg are you okay? And I'm like lol yeah I was making a joke it's chill. I'd love a ship for LotR and Leverage! Thank you!

I hope you like them! Ships under cut!

Lotr:

I ship you with Boromir.

I feel like he would be one of the few that could handle you lmao. He loves your energy, and your personality, even if times he can't always keep up. He finds you immensely interesting, and can talk to you about anything. His father can't stand you, but that doesn't bother Bormir at all, because you are one of the few people that isn't afraid of his father. Boromir adores your confidence, and appreciates your candor.

Best-Friend: Merry and Pippin. Both of them. Once you met them they were like long lost brothers. Together you are absolute chaos in the best way. But you are care a lot about your friends.

-------

Leverage:

I ship you with Eliot.

He thought you were intense, but very interesting. He appreciates people who don't take shit from anyone, and are willing to stand up to people who are wrong. He thinks you are hilarious, but sometimes can't tell when you are being serious or not. He likes to cook for you, and always has you try his more experimental ideas because he knows you will always be honest and will have good suggestions. He does try to get you to stay with interests and hobbies to master them, but will never force you.

Best-Friend: Parker. Again, chaos twins, agents of chaos, the ultimate team of confusion. You get along really well and understand each other when no one else does.

#ship #ships #7k milestone ships #milestone ships #lotr ship #leverage ship #zalera8310 #zalera8310 ships

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an-organized-confusion · 3 years

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[TSS] Masterpost Time

I think it has been due time to set this sort of thing up, because I wanted to update my pinned post with this.

Gymrat!AU

Fics on Ao3, here.

Art/Writing tag on main, here.

Masterlist here.

iZ!AU [Body Horror Warning]

Fics on Ao3, here.

Art/Writing tag on main, here.

[Masterpost pending?]

Begotten!AU Masterpost [Pending; Body/Cosmic Horror Warning]

Promethean!AU [Body Horror & Gore Warning]:

What started this?

Muse!Roman Art - (He looks like a mannequin.)

Creativitwin Angst

Wasteland Effects & Shitty Puns

Nepri!Logan Art - (Gore, missing leg.)

Wretched!Remus Art - (Look like Frankenstein’s Monster. Potential eye strain from lightning/fire elements.)

Who Made Them & How Did They Get All The Bodies?

Wretched!Remus HCs

Tammuz!Virgil Art - (Crystal growth, cracks on skin, parts “melting”.)

Hollow!Janus Art - (Bones visible, emaciated in appearance, lots of blood.)

Muse!Patton Art - (Looks like a Ken doll. [Candy/Pastel] gore, he’s been stabbed and guts are visible.)

Attitudes on Humans

Dukeceit Shenanigans

Wretched!Remus, The Propane Salesman

...

Analysis Posts [Usually typology stuff]:

Neurological Rambling (Right vs Left Brain Stuff)

Main Typology Post

Logan-Centric Typology Post

Feedback Loops

Four Tendencies

More Creativitwin MBTI Stuff

Loops & Grip-States

The Inner Jackass

How They [Can] Make Each Other Better

Enneagram Stuff

Anxiety & Reappraisal

Chiaroscuro & the Creativitwins

Roman & Remus’s Extroverted Judging Functions

Roman Being An Upholder (Response to a thread)

Remus Being A Rebel

Idle Minds Think Up Weird Shit

Horror & Humor

Ego-Syntonic vs Ego-Dystonic

Roman & Remus’s Thinking Functions

Roman & Logan’s Relationship with Te

Enlightenment vs Romanticism (Response to a thread)

...

Incorrect Sides Quotes:

#1 | #2 | #3 | #4 | #5 | #6 - “Metalocalypse“

#7 | #8 | #9 - “Mythbusters“

#10 - “Here Comes Dr. Tran”

...

Music Associations:

Another Masterpost

Infected Mushroom Songs

“Dork“ Sides in a Psychobilly Band

Remus Would Like Nekrogoblikon

Sides Singing “Fuck Everything“

Some Dark!Roman Songs

Fun Music Transformations

Dethklok Songs

Every Noise At Once - Genre Talk

My “Bad“ Music Taste

Boil The Frog

...

Fitness Silliness:

Creativitwins At The Gym

Sides & DAREBEE RPGs #1

Sides & DAREBEE RPGs #2

Various Events/Programs/Etc. I Associated With the Creativitwins

Fireheart Program - Very Roman

DARETREE stuff

...

Personal / About the Mod:

BFRBs Definitely Desensitized Me of That Imagery

Ways I Describe My Creativities

Me / My Child / My Spouse

Relating with Intrulogical

My Creativities’ Fusion

Some Childhood Memories/Stories With My Bro

Nightmares & Intrusive Thoughts: From A Horror Artist

My Creativities’ Inception

Which Sides I Would Fight & Would They Kick My Ass

Me And Co-Conspirator Do Some Relating With Remus

I Really Like Undead Stuff, Okay?

How I Would Relate to Ace!Remus & Aro!Roman

Some of My Sides

Ships I Relate To The Most

Some Ways I Relate To Janus

Nausea Fuel Nostalgia

Sap Mode - My Light Creativity

Stan/Simp (+more Patton feelings.)

...

Miscellaneous:

A fun reaction to “Am I Original?“

Reacting to “Turkish Star Wars“

As Final Fantasy Job Classes

Comparing Monkeybone to The Creativitwins

As Metalocalypse Characters

Sheo & Remus Totally Have The Same Energy (very popular post, for this blog)

I Like Physical Comedy, Okay?

Characters That Remind Me Of Remus (fairly popular post)

Sides’ Opinions On Final Fantasy

Undead Sides

Patton, Janus, and Wordplay

Remus & Dangerous Chemicals

Truffles & Remus

Roman influencing Remus

Movie Night in The Imagination

Cheap/Fast/Good

The V-22 Osprey Was A Disaster

“Why We Love Villains“

As Repo! Characters

FWSA: What Could’ve Been

Remus as Chemistry Teacher?

Some Fun Linguistics Stuff For Janus

Some Gross Smell Science

...

Whoo boy - was it worth an allnighter to screen through my entire blog to do this? Probably not... but it is one less thing to worry about! Even if my ANS be wigging out hella bad rn. WOOPS. orz

(Also went through and tagged all my posts #(mod post) that weren’t already. Huzzah for nearly pointless blog housekeeping.)

#sanders sides #remus sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #logan sanders #janus sanders #patton sanders #(mod post)

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awesome-timtams · 5 years

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Avengers: Endgame Spoiler Review/Thoughts and shit

(if you want me to add more tags to this, just comment or something and I’ll get on it ASAP)

Alright, so I saw Avengers: Endgame this morning. I guess this is going to be a review of sorts? Mostly just me typing out all my thoughts. So yeah, review, theories (ish?) and other things amongst all that.

I did this last year for Infinity War and it was a huge mess. I decided to actually properly capitalise my words this time so it’s a bit more readable lmao. I’ve sort of had all day (12 hours) to really think about this so hopefully it’s a bit more coherent than my last year’s mindless rambling? I’m already rambling. Welp ;-;

MAJOR SPOILERS UNDERNEATH CUT!! DO NOT PRESS READ MORE IF YOU DON’T WANT TO READ MORE.

Everybody who doesn’t want spoilers gone? This is your last chance.

Ok, first things first, the movie is fucking amazing. There were so many instances where I cried, or laughed, or just really wanted to fucking scream because holy hell this movie was really intense. Honestly, I thought the humour managed to flow into the dramatic scenes really well. There was never a moment where I felt like a joke fell flat or came in at an inappropriate time.

The feels. THE FEELS. The emotions. I can't. I was already sobbing by the time the first 20 minutes were over. A character appears on screen? Tears. Every single time there was a team shot? Tears. Somebody even opens their mouth to say something? Tears. But yeah, this movie made me an emotional wreck and I can't even.

The movie starting off with Clint, and his family turning into dust? Expected, but still incredibly cruel, and still hurt a lot. Like, damn, I knew Endgame was going to be intense, but being reduced to tears in the first five minutes was incredibly unfair and just goddamned hurtful. Clint's dedication to his family was really sweet and I just garghhhhhhhhhh I loved it.

So yeah. Character deaths. Natasha dying just about ruined my century, so thanks Marvel. I first started panicking when they said they were gonna get the stones, and Clint and Natasha were heading to Vormir. And then it kinda hit me that one of them was gonna have to sacrifice the other for the stone. And then the whole scene with Clint and Natasha trying to beat each other into throwing themselves off the cliff. Dumbasses. Why couldn't they both just live and nobody has to sacrifice anybody? And now I feel depressed again ;-; . On the other hand, I'm sort of happy that Natasha at least died feeling like she'd made amends for her past (she didn't have to she was already amazing :'(( ). Her character arc finished with her sacrifice and wow that's so depressing ;-;;; At least we get to see her in the Black Widow movie one last time? ;-;

And Tony. I honestly didn't really think Marvel was going to go through with Tony's death tbh. I think it was probably one of the most depressing scenes I've had to witness with my own two eyes ever, and I definitely wasn't ready for it to happen. I fucking broke when Peter started crying and calling him 'Tony' because like, have we ever seen him refer to Tony as anything other than Mr Stark? I fucking lost it man. And Tony had Pepper, and he was married to her, and they had a little house by the lake, and a daughter (his daughter is so precious omg). And now he's dead and she'll grow up without her father I just fucking arGHHHHHHH. Honestly I just feel really attacked and hurt and this movie has ruined me. At least he got closure with his father. That was kinda a really sweet scene, and I cried at that too. I cried at fucking everything in this movie ;-;

But yes, depressing scenes aside, can we just. Take a moment to talk about the final battle? Because that scene was absolutely splendid. I loved how every character got a couple seconds to themselves to just have a little hero moment, and how they did the whole girl power thing with the whole squad and they were so badass and I sort of teared up at that part too because they were all so amazing and I just love them so much and the only thing that would've made that scene better would be if Natasha had been with them but she can't because she's fucking dead oh my god.

But when the portals opened up and all the characters stepped out of them. It looked fucking magical. I swear to God I had So Many Chills. It was just so fucking amazing to watch them all step out as one and yanno…”Avengers, Assemble!”. God bless them all. The audience lost their shit at this bit. Screaming and clapping and it was just absolutely breathtaking to see this scene. Like, there's just this energy, yanno? And the group shots. T’Challa leading his kingdom into the fight. Tony and Pepper’s really cute scene in their armour together. And, can we just take a break to talk about our fucking lord and saviour Steve Rogers? I love that boy so much holy shit. When Thor was about to die, and Mjolnir had flown in and hit Thanos, before flying off to the person who had thrown it. And it’s Steve Fucking Rogers, standing there holding Mjolnir? And he starts walking down the battlefield with his half broken shield in one hand and Mjolnir in the other? That was such a powerful image have I mentioned I fucking love Steve Rogers? But yeah, I love how they carried that on from AoU. But then that sort of begs the question: was Steve really able to lift Mjolnir in AoU but didn’t because he didn’t want to draw more attention to himself, or was he just not able to because he hadn’t reached peak worthiness yet?

Also, the whole New York scene was just amazing, fucking hilarious and just amazing. Who knew that all we needed to make a sequence great was to have a 100% necessary focus on Steve's ass? Jokes aside, it was really nostalgic seeing the whole 2012 New York battle again. I especially loved how they let us see parts that actually weren't in the movie, like the whole 'Avengers running into Pierce' thing. And how HYDRA got their hands on the sceptre. Seeing Steve do the whole 'Hail Hydra' thing to blend in kinda gave me chills lol. And Steve's fight with 2012!Steve was also really amazingly done and I fucking loved that sequence. The whole "I can do this all da-" "yeah yeAH I kNow I knOOW" was fucking hilarious tbh. (And also: "That is America's ass…")

Also, can I say that Steve was just really done with everything in this movie lmao. He was a solid fucking mood honestly. (”Are you shitting me??” “...he’s a baby.” “-.-”) And then his scene with Bucky at the end oh my goddd. “Don’t do anything stupid.” “How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.” And honestly I sort of died right there...It’s also this moment I’m realising Bucky probably knew about Steve’s plans, because otherwise they wouldn’t have said goodbye like that if Steve was only going to be gone for a bit. And Bucky wasn’t panicked at all when Steve missed the jump back. So what, does that mean they planned for Steve to have his dramatic ass entrance back into the present by appearing besides the lake? Kind of a funny image lol. Anyway, I’ll stop talking about Steve lmao.

Thor was fucking amazing in this movie tbh. His first scene in the future is hilarious, with the whole drunkard attitude and the beer gut and Korg playing fucking Fortnite Jesus Christ. His scene with Frigga in the movie also made me cry so much. It kinda made me realise he never really managed to get a proper goodbye with his mother before she died, yanno? And now he's finally getting it, and he can go on to the future with the knowledge that his mother is proud of him and believes he's a hero and afilajiopklgskl. Also, the pure joy when he finds out he's still worthy of Mjolnir? Such a sweet happy wholesome character despite all the losses he's gone through ;-; . Although, since he has decided to join the Guardians, does that mean he's going to be in Guardians of the Galaxy 3? And we know how there's been talk of a Thor 4 recently, right? It's probably just code for GOTG3 lol.

And finally, Bruce Banner. It was really funny to see him emerge as a mix of himself and Hulk together, I'm not gonna lie. A lot of people in the audience started laughing when we saw the Hulk emerge in a sweater and jeans or whatever the hell he was wearing. But yeah, Bruce was great. When he volunteered himself to wield the Infinity Gauntlet v2.0? Legendary. But yeah, I honestly don't have much to say about Bruce honestly. Other than the fact that he dabbed at the beginning of the movie. Legendary. And when Scott spilled his tacos so Bruce offered him more with the purest smile on his face? I melted. Legendary.

Anyway, miscellaneous thoughts time. I'm lowkey sort of kinda disappointed Nebula didn't get to kill Thanos? Like, I feel like, if anybody really deserved to kill that asshole, it was Nebula. She's suffered an entire life of torture and abuse from this dickhead, and has been manipulated by him so many times to do his dirty work. And how she still couldn't stop seeing him as a father figure in the end, despite all the terrible shit he's done to her? Actually, that's probably why she didn't get to kill him lol. And also, Sam Wilson is the new fucking Captain America bitches. I really fucking hoped that, if under any circumstances Steve had to give up his shield, it would go to Sam Wilson, because he fucking deserves it. Of course, I wouldn't have minded it going to Bucky, but my poor baby's already been through enough ;-; . Let him rest ;-; (but then, there's the whole Falcon and Winter Soldier show coming up fuck I'm so excited for it lmao).

And also, Valkyrie. Is now. The new Queen of Asgard. I can't even. My baby girl deserves fucking everything :') She deserves the title of Queen so much and I'm so glad that's a new development. Hopefully we get to see more of her in the future and how she fares with the title of leader in Asgard :'D

But yeah, I think that's about it for what I have on characters. So, moving on to theories and sort of plot holes I suppose?

So, have we had any news on what the Loki show is going to focus on? I haven't really been paying enough attention to news on the shows tbh. But if nothing's been confirmed yet, I sort of have a theory. So we know how, when they're trying to get the Space Stone in New York, they fail and Loki gets away with the stone? I'm wondering if the TV show might potentially focus on what he does after he escapes New York with the stone. It's a possibility, I suppose.

And now, finally, one of my biggest…annoyances (? I'm not sure this is the word I want to use but the only other word that's coming to mind is iffs which isn't even a real word so moving on) (edit: issues! I found the right word :D . The word I want to use is issues lol) with the movie is the last scene.

Steggy is a fucking blessed ship, and I love them, don't get me wrong. The plane scene in TFA and the hospital scene in TWS never fail to reduce me to a big sobbing fucking baby. And I'm so fucking happy that they finally got the dance that's been promised to them for so many decades. But the whole thing just doesn't really make sense to me.

So basically, in the earlier parts of the movie, Bruce has already stated that time travel does not work like how we've all been trained to understand from other parts of pop culture. It's not quite travelling to the past, as nothing they do there will affect their future. What I interpreted from that (and I could be wrong, but this is my understanding) is that when they travel to the past, they end up creating a separate branch of events and shit that diverges from the timeline of events that will lead to their present. It doesn't erase their present, but just sort of forms a permanent branch, you feel? So, Steve travelling back to the past in order to live his life with Peggy only to end up in their present again brought in a huge amount of plot holes.

For Steve to have lived a life with Peggy and marry her, that would mean events would change drastically. I doubt they got married in secret, so people must've known 'Steve' was alive and OK. Would that mean the search for the past Steve that's still frozen in the Arctic stop, since they're all assuming he's alive? If that happens, that means the Tesseract would've never been found, and that would've led to a whole bunch of other events that would definitely not allow for grandpa Steve to join up again with the MCU's present timeline, as it would've brought him into a different branch instead.

But, hypothetically, let's say Steve lives with Peggy in secret. They get married in secret, nobody knows he's still alive, they continue with the search, yadda yadda. Now, since Steve is from the future, he would know that SHIELD is being infiltrated by HYDRA, and that Bucky would still be alive and is currently being the Winter Soldier and doing assassin-y shit. And I really, really, highly doubt that Steve would just live a life with Peggy and not interrupt with any of this shit. It's just so against his nature to ignore all of this? So, let's say he does root out HYDRA. That would affect the future. TWS, and everything afterwards would've never happened. So it definitely wouldn't be possible for Steve to return to the MCU's current, present timeline if he lived out his life, as he would've been, once again, on a different, permanently separated branch.

Let's say, hypothetically, he lived with Peggy in secret. Nobody knew he was alive. He knew HYDRA was growing inside SHIELD and didn't do anything. He knew his best friend was being tortured and brainwashed for decades and didn't do anything. Even then, him just living with Peggy and marrying her would've changed all the events and wouldn't have allowed him to just let his branch converge with the present MCU timeline without messing around with some serious science and shit (which is all highly unlikely tbh).

So basically, what I'm trying to say is, the whole last scene is fucked and can't have happened without saying 'fuck-it-all' to the rules established in the movie. But yeah, that was just the one and only glaring issue to me I couldn't stop thinking about. But either way, I loved the way the movie ended with the Steggy scene. It was really beautiful and sweet and just everything we could've wanted for their dance :')) . It was also a really bittersweet sort of tone to end the film on? Absolutely gorgeous.

(edit: wow OK so I made a whole separate post just for this scene because a couple days after I posted this, I realised my thoughts and feelings towards this scene had changed and I had a lot more to say about it. So. Yeah. Here it is.)

But anyway. Shit. That's it. I've spent this whole past year thinking about this movie and waiting for it, and now that I've watched it and it's over, I don't know what I'm going to do with myself. This whole day, I've been feeling incredibly empty honestly. I'm still not quite over Natasha and Tony, and I don't think I'll ever be (which, by the way. Marvel, I'll be sending you the bill for all the emotional trauma you've caused.) But this movie was a bloody masterpiece, and I fucking loved it. The trip down memory lane with the time travel was honestly so incredibly implemented. I was really worried when I realised time travel was going to be involved with this movie, because it introduces a device that can retcon everything and just basically takes away the emotional impact of every event that happens because you can just time travel. But the fact that they introduced the mechanic where you can't affect the past by travelling there does close that issue up. Well done. Very clever.

But, yeah. Fuck. It's over. 11 years, and it went out with a bang. I honestly have no idea how Marvel is gonna top this for the next era. It seems almost impossible, honestly. I just really hope they do, because I would hate to have a franchise as amazing as the MCU end up fizzling out because their most impressive movie came years before the end and they end up never being able to top it. But these are probably just irrational worries.

Anyway, final score. 14000605/1. Would definitely watch again. Just not immediately. I still haven't fully digested the movie, and I still feel really empty and full of emotions at the same time even though it's been more than 12 hours since I've seen the movie. So yeah. Imma wait a bit, and then I'll probs rewatch it.

Anyway, rant over. Hope you enjoyed, I guess? I nearly burst into tears so many times trying to write this fucking thing. If you've seen the movie, feel free to DM me. I'm always up to chat with people lol. And if you haven't seen the movie, what the fuck are you doing reading this? Go watch the damned movie. Christ.

I might end up making edits to this if I think up of more things to talk about. Or maybe I'll make a separate post. I'll probs make a separate post. But anyway. Farewell, y'all. Time to go hide under my blankets and cry until Far From Home comes out.

(Also, this thing is 3069 words. Wow. Jesus Christ. If I put this amount of effort into my assignments, I’d be bringing in straight As. Oops.)

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maskedl0ve · 5 years

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✨ LOVELY OOC MEME ✨

✨ TAGGED BY: @panickypeachboy (THANK YOU PLUSHIE) ✨ TAGGING: IM.....SO BAD AT TAG....PLEASE STEAL THIS FROM ME

NAME: Yume NICKNAME: Yume AGE: 21 FACE CLAIM: Suga from Forest of Drizzling Rain is the character I use the most as my faceclaim. I love him to piECES and no matter how many times i try to use other characters as my face claim i always tend to fall back to him. You can also see me switch between other miscellaneous characters, mostly Kaitou Kid tho PRONOUNS: She/her HEIGHT: 5′7′‘ BIRTHDAY: Feburary 25

AESTHETIC: Rain, Tea, Books, cute Desserts, stopping now before i ramble

LAST SONG YOU LISTENED TO: Ga1ahad and Scientific Witchery By Mili. Mili’s songs are....so good....

FAVORITE MUSE ( S ) YOU’VE WRITTEN: why must you do this to me u h...i have a shit ton of muses so it’s hard to say which are my FAVORITES. but...I guess Zen from Persona Q, Emil from Nier, Sora from Kingdom Hearts, Andersen from Fate / Extra CCC, uhhhh.....i du n n o i have lots of muses

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO TAKE ON YOUR CURRENT MUSE ( THAT YOU ARE POSTING THIS ON ): I have two of my friends to blame for this hecker l’D A friend of mine wrote lucas in a private rp and i loved how he wrote him sO MUCH. so he introduced me to Mother 3 and two of my friends said I’d love claus. I watched chugga’s sUPER OLD lp, played the game myself on an emulator and yeah i ended up super inspired to write him after i did so. I couldn’t stop thinking of headcanons for him and uh... ye a h... long story short i have two enablers to blame .-.

WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE ASPECTS OF YOUR CURRENT MUSE: Hmm... This is gonna sound horrible but his mentality and the things that happened to him. Caus it’s been so much fun figuring out how his mind works and just how much of him is robotic and how his psi works and is different and ect ect. but if we’re talking just rping in general, i love how much of a sweetheart claus can be when he isn’t scared. I love how that despite everything he’s still a sweetheart and cares a lot about others and genuinely wants to get better. He was in a horrible place and kinda still is mentally. but he’s trying and i really like that...

WHAT’S YOUR BIGGEST INSPIRATION WHEN IT COMES TO WRITING: Hmmm...it’s a multitude of things. Sometimes if I’m writing Masked Man i listen to the song ‘Sl0t’ by mili cause it gives me them masked man vibes. but usually a lot of my inspiration comes from discussing things with other people or just...seeing things of claus or seeing mother 3 things in general. i dunno. i get inspirited by other people lots.

FAVORITE TYPES OF THREADS: Usually i like really emotional rps but i have to say with claus i really like soft threads with him. I adore the threads where he finally lets down his walls even if just for a little or takes small steps to becoming a better. or just...threads where he actually talks about stuff that happened, letting people in. Or heckin helping others. i dunno. with claus i really like bitter sweet, sweet, emotional stuff that isn’t supreme angst, and mellow stuff. im bad explaining stuff i gomen.

BIGGEST STRUGGLE IN REGARDS TO YOUR CURRENT MUSE: Too much angst,,,, I love my son but by god for a while he was so miserable that i felt it and i lost his muse for a long while. so that’s the problem i have with him. Him breaking down or getting hurt and bottling things up to the point where it destroys him. so u h...... y e a h , , , , ,

#[ The Claus You Have Dialed is Not in Service || OOC ]#I TRIED

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runningheadless · 7 years

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5 things meme

I was tagged by my bud @seaweedredandbrown so I figured I’d do this before I go to sleep.

Five things you’ll find in my bag:

My wallet

My phone

My keys, both for home and car. Should I include my pepper spray in this thing, since it’s attached to one of the key rings?

Travel toothbrush and toothpaste. One way I’ve learned to get around never remembering to brush my teeth at regular times of the day is just always have the necessary supplies on me when I eventually remember.

Uuuuuuh a sketchbook, notebook, and/or craft supplies, including but not limited to, origami paper, embroidery thread, knitting needles and yarn, and a sewing kit.

Five things in my bedroom:

Well I suppose this isn’t calling for the usual stuff so I guess… my LEGO city buildings for one, gathering dust. I should really do something about that.

My many plushies, I don’t even know how many. Probably nearing 20 at this point.

A dress form with a half-assed piece of leather ‘armor’ on it. My biggest point of disappointment in myself right now. The design is lackluster and I never did the edges and I’m not even using the dress form for anything else right now?? I was supposed to make a star trek dress uniform for myself 6 months ago? I have so much fabric. Maybe I should have just made this post “unfinished crafts and miscellaneous unused craft supplies”. That’s not even counting the partially crushed Unseen University paper model.

That last one covered a lot so I guess… everything on the floor. Books, clothes, bags, food containers, you name it, it’s on the floor.

I forgot about my skateboard we found on the beach. Nobody rides it, the thing is too high anyway and the edges are all banged up. I should leave it out with a free box somewhere.

Five things I’ve always wanted to do in life:

Be a librarian

Be a programmer

Be a waterbender

Visit Korea again because the last time I was there I was 4 years old and I don’t mean I had had 4 birthdays I mean I had been alive for 4 years and I don’t remember jack shit.

Learn Korean properly. I will forever blame my parents for just letting me stop speaking Korean at home once we moved back to the US. I also wish they had sent me to Saturday school earlier and more regularly.

Five things that make my happy:

My 4 lovely closest friends

Eating and sharing good food

Watching the movie Amelie. It never fails.

Reading the book Good Omens. Again, never fails.

I’m really struggling here but I didn’t want to individually name my friends so I guess I’ll end with knowing that I have 4 two-dollar bills.

Five things people may not know about me:

Fuck, I don’t know? I’ve worn the same pair of glasses for three years now and the paint is chipping, the screws fell out at the corners so I fixed it with Instamorph, and one of my nosepieces kinda fell off.

I cut my hair into a buzzcut in order to cosplay Negasonic Teenage Warhead and have tried to grow it out about 3 times now. It keeps frustrating me with the slow speed.

I have supported way more Kickstarters than I should have. One of the things I’m learning to budget right now is unnecessary spending.

I am the second oldest of at least 12 cousins, only two of which are on my mom’s side. Please note that my dad has three direct siblings, two half siblings, and an adopted sibling.

I was raised Mormon, technically. I mean the church is called The Church of Jesus Christ and the Latter Day Saints but mostly we call it the LDS Church, or call ourselves Mormon. As I recall though, most of the members in our ward didn’t like it when the younger peeps called it Mormon, because of the connotations surrounding the idea of Mormonism. Which is unfortunate because they do follow the teachings in The Book of Mormon. And actually the LDS Church is totally the one targeted in the musical The Book of Mormon. My dad was a missionary so he liked to invite the ward missionaries over for dinner whenever we could. Anyway I’m rambling and the important part is that I don’t go to church anymore. Honestly there are a lot of things unnerving about it.

Anyway time to stop rambling now. Let’s see, let’s tag uh @n3bulas-and-satelites, @jadasaurrawr, @thecomiccreator, @soupinawineglass, and @weekend-writer. You don’t have to if you don’t want but there ya have it.

#yumi talks

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