eating König x high school sweetheart up like a buffet tbh [Gordon Ramsey voice] finally some good fucking food 🤌🔥
What if König and Sweetheart had an oops baby? Sweetheart is estatic because it’s the best of both of them and König would be the best dad! You’ve overcome your pasts to build a sweet little future together!!
He agrees that he would be the best dad (to anyone else’s baby, not hers 😤) but is panicking because his plans to leave her in the dust have been effectively put on hold for 18 years. She didn’t baby trap him, he obvs baby-trapped her!! He’s goes into Turbo Cope Mode and convinces himself that no one will want her as a single mom, and that no one is more qualified to raise HIS baby than HIM. He’ll play happy family for now (⬅️ will play happy family forever).
I just imagine him breeding her like crazy ("out of revenge") until there's 5 carbon copies of him and her running around and calling him 'daddy' and her, 'mommy' :) It stopped being an "oops" at the third one but he simply can't stop himself!
He wasn't sure what his plan was but it def wasn't this: her being like a ray of sun when he comes back home, kids running around everywhere and practically climbing him like koalas, asking if he has anything for them, the oldest even snatches his knife out of it's sheath when he's preoccupied with grabbing this crawling little thing on the floor before it bonks its head.
"The babysitter cancelled at the last minute," she breaths a smile and a kiss on his lips while the 3 months old baby König is staring at them wide-mouthed. "Perhaps it's a good thing, otherwise you'd have too much time in your hands to knock me up again..."
(re: sssniperwolf and jacksfilms)
It's laughable that she escalated it that hard. Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty sure stalking him like that is illegal and it's terrifying regardless, but Jack said in a stream (can't remember which one) that he wasn't about bringing up past controversies of hers or cancelling. And now she shows up outside his house (wtf!!!). Like he was willing to only call her out for stealing and freebooting but she's gone and stalked him and Jack doesn't seem like the type of guy to take that shit. Actual WTF moment from her part. wild
omg long post below bc apparently I have opinions:
YES!! THAT'S WHAT'S SO INCREDIBLE ABOUT THIS... Jack has been genuinely diligent about keeping things on-topic in his streams, and hasn't brought up any of her other Stuff, or anything Personal. Despite the fact that she kickstarted the whole thing by making it INCREDIBLY personal and attacking his physical appearance...
His goal has been to call out and bring attention to content theft, and he's stuck with it. Dude's also cared about this for years, and she's not the first content thief he's criticized. He just hates the way that freebooting has become so accepted-- to the point where youtube praised her for "coming up with such creative video ideas"? Hey! Ew!
Dude wasn't trying to get her cancelled though, there was no smear campaign of her character. He's been rallying to get her to CREDIT the creators that she relies on for all of her content. It would set a precedent for all other "react" channels on the platform for one of the biggest channels on youtube to actually give credit where credit is due. Or, god forbid, get permission first? It's not hard.
It's already done the job of making some other people who do "react content" self-analyze whether or not their content is transformative, and to maybe care about crediting the creators they rely on for their genre to work. There is a way to make this kind of video that isn't so slimy. And making fun of her lackluster-at-best reactions is so far from even being a big deal. Bc she literally does just sit there and say nothing.
Plus, his goal has a clear End built into it: if she started shouting out the creators she takes content from, and put links directly to their pages in her video descriptions, the job would be done! That's what he's asking her to do. Real bare minimum stuff.
It legit would have been easy to steer away from the content theft and to also talk about her history of lying to her audience! her ghosting a dying kid with cancer who was a big fan of hers! the fact that she's been arrested for armed robbery! her history of transphobia! He would also get more clicks that way, which is what she claims is his sole goal- to get more clicks.
I'll bring it up though!
She's been a terrible person the whole time, and has kept a steady course of manipulating her audience of young children and/or, let's be completely honest, simps- into thinking that she's a Wholesome creator. (And now, into thinking she's an innocent victim.) All of the actual effort put in by her has gone toward optics, not the content she puts out. A carefully constructed online persona, for one, but also literal appearances. Jack totally can't say this, bc she already went off the handle and said the only reason he doesn't like her is bc he Hates To See A Woman Be Successful. But I can! That was a cheap shot for her to use that argument when, for once, it's not applicable! Much the opposite, even! Dudes online wouldn't go to bat for her if she didn't look the way she does. And it weakens any case she'd have against him by making baseless claims like that.
She banks hugely on being an attractive woman to get her clicks/following. A massive amount of effort is put into her appearance. The makeup, the lip fillers, putting her hair in little pigtails, the chokers and tube tops, the big non-prescription Nerd Glasses, the thumbnails where she has her mouth open in That Expression?
I don't even have to say anything. But making a weird facial expression and putting your hair in pigtails aren't moral failings.
Showing up at someone's real life home (whose address you shouldn't even have access to), filming the front of their house at night, doxxing them to your audience of millions of people? Because you were mad at them online? That is fully scary! Yeah girl I'm pretty sure that Jack can press charges! There is absolutely no way to take the moral highground now that she's literally stalked him, and doxxed his home.
She tried to goad him and Erin (Jack's wife) out of the house, also, which creeps me out even more-- because what was she planning to do? The fact that she's been arrested for violent crime before does pop into my mind! lmao!
Jack was streaming a game at the time that she was outside his home, and these clips of him, his friends, and Erin reacting in real time to what is genuinely a scary situation have been taken down in case he needs to use them in legal action. Shit is legitimately serious!
dont normally post about drama but this seems relevant:
im seeing a lot of people jump to "james somerton was never good anyways" in retaliation for the hbomb expose, but there's a really fine line to tread there before you get into stepping on the toes of the people he stole from, you know?
some of his videos and analysis did seem genuinely intelligent, thoughtful, insightful, and well-written. yeah, it turns out those are the result of him stealing from other people. but that doesnt mean the original writers WEREN'T intelligent, thoughtful, insightful and good writers. he had plenty of garbage opinions interspersed throughout, but the reason many people (myself included) were suckered in by him is that the queer creators he stole from DID have really important and interesting analysis. the parts of his videos that were good were stolen, but by discounting his essays entirely we're throwing the baby out with the bathwater and insisting those he stole from didn't have anything important to say.
the parts he himself supplied were trash, but he stole the work of some genuinely brilliant and insightful writers and passed it off as his own- and that writing still exists and is still brilliant and insightful; we just know now who was actually responsible for it and who to thank for that work
lets just be careful when we smugly proclaim that we always hated everything he had to say- because a lot of the words we're discounting were never his to begin with, and the last thing those authors need is to have their work trash talked because it ended up in the mouth of someone dishonest
anyways thought it'd be fun, given my previous post about his dissociation with conversations, to try and guess what his takeaways were from his phone call with Charlie based on his reactions
Maybe I'm wrong about what he's catching and what he's missing but either way I had fun
strike through= what he missed
bold=what he caught
neither bold nor strikethrough= he might've heard it/made it out through the white noise, but not enough to connect the dots
RED= only heaven is in red cuz you cannot convince me otherwise that that's not a trigger word for him
Idk thought it’d be fun to try and guess what Lucifer is ACTUALLY hearing with his dissociation filter on let's GO
Lucifer: [insert absolute fail of hello]
Charlie: Hi Dad!
Lucifer: Hey! How are ya? Oh! Wh-wh-where are you these days?
Charlie: You know where I am, Dad… I’ve told you before…
Lucifer: You hAve? Oh. yeah Uh, erm well I um uh
Charlie: I told you when you called me five months ago! Or did you not listen?
Lucifer: No no no just forgot! I just forgot. I’ve been really busy with you know… um. iMpOrTanT tHiNgS
Charlie: Well I’m actually running a hotel to rehabilitate sinners, maybe you saw our commercial?
Lucifer: No? Sadly I… missed it!
Lucifer: You know I haven’t been watching much TV lately! Scrambles the brain!
Lucifer: but hey! A hotel! Fun!
Charlie: Listen, Dad, I’ve got kinda… a big ask?
Lucifer: -spit take- Yeah?! Of course! Anything in my power is yours for the asking you just name it
Charlie: I need to speak to heaven! Well, whoever’s in charge up there above Adam above anybody, I need to go to the top!
Lucifer: NO
Lucifer: no no no no
Lucifer: That’s uhahah no…
Charlie: Look! Dad! I don’t ask you for much. I never have, but this-this is really important to me. It’s the most important thing I’ve ever done and I… need… you… I need your help
Lucifer: I-... I don’t know Charlie
Charlie: Please just- Come see what I’m trying to do. You’ll see why it’s a really good idea and heaven is bound to agree if I get the chance to talk to them
Charlie: Please dad
Lucifer: wait… you’re… INVITING ME OVER???
Lucifer: ABSOLUTELY
Lucifer: I’LL BE THERE IN AN HOUR
___
so yeah, he can semi follow along but like crucial bits and pieces ARE being left out
Part 1 of this thing that doesn’t actually have a steady flow
But wouldn’t it be so funny that the guy you get along with just fine is the brother of the guy that you feel like wanting to shower after making eye contact? Because I think it is
Apologies for the weird colors I did my best with the lighting I have 🧎♀️
h-how do you ever finish any of your work? genuine question because you seem to be productive despite your agreste syndrome and I need to learn your ways. but also how do you ever finish any of your work
unclear. last night i stayed up and finished a report worth 25% of my grade at about 5am, arrived on time for my 9am lecture, and spent about half of it zoned out while thinking about seventeen year old emilie agreste. and i was one of the most active participants in the class discussion
devastating to go into the tag for an obscure vampire movie I've been quietly obsessed with for years to find mostly gifsets of minor characters (played by big-name actors) and review blogs saying they didn't like it :(
@ everyone who made a post saying "I liked it :)" I am blowing you a kiss. everyone who made a lovely gifset or photoset of the cinematography I am tipping my hat. that one poster that said "bro did y'all just miss the Entire Message about class and race or???" I am shaking your hand with enthusiasm there was SUCH a message about class and race
anyway everybody should watch Night Teeth and revel in glitzy flashy modern vampires in LA with me