#what she did was abuse

[lecinea]

Listen, both Yu Ziyuan and Jiang Fengmian were shitty parents that fucked their kids (& wwx) up in various different ways. But I will forever be more sympathetic to a frustrated woman in a patriarchal society stuck in a toxic marriage than to the man who has power and authority to change something but refuses to do it because he doesn't like conflict and pretends like nothing is wrong.

#also i am convinced that yzy was pressured into marrying jfm by her family #because even before wwx was there she had people call her madam yu instead of madam jiang which is the title she is entitled to #and frequently went on nighthunts to get away from her life in lotus pier #yu ziyuan #jiang fengmian #mdzs #let me be very clear though yzy still took her valid frustrations out on a child which is fucked up and wrong #what she did was abuse #but i get why she was angry #i do not get why jfm was so crappy to his children and honestly incredibly unfair to wwx #i might eleborate further with textual evidence if someone's interested

[inkskinned]

am i gonna put you in the book acknowledgements am i gonna be able to say your name without flinching am i ever gonna get a word in edgewise am i ever gonna recover the time i spent with you. computer virus kid; i arrived in your life already begging to be let in. somehow insecure i could even be your friend. like you had a line outside the door and we were all shifting our weight, begging.

you're so fucking good at that - at making people feel like they need to earn you, like you're a commodity none of us can afford. no kindness or careful communication could work on you - you were so good at just going-ghost, about deciding someone just wasn't cool-enough. something about that is super ironic. even the parts of it that weren't romantic felt like a romance book. i wanted you to like me so badly i scrubbed myself clean just so you'd spare me - what. your favor? a look?

okay okay okay. it's just a friendship - if it was even true that we were friends, if you even saw me as someone you trusted. on reddit someone would tell me girl literally just cut her out of your life, it's not that difficult. even i was aware of how fucked up the whole situation was. like, why the fuck do i even care about your approval? you're like, not even that fun to be around. you are often a little bit cruel.

but for almost four years of my life, i thought i had found someone like me. somebody who liked the same things i do. someone who liked to read and who liked making jokes with esoteric references and who spent maybe too much time on the internet and who was absolutely a little bit pretentious. i don't know, something about that was powerful and addictive.

i keep thinking about our last conversation. about how i said - okay, enough is enough. you pushed me too far, you really hurt my feelings.

and how you laughed and said - you think you're the victim?

#spilled ink #warm up #writeblr #she physically assaulted me and then screamed in my face #but not before sh'ing first and blaming it on me #while she was locked in my bathroom. at 1 in the morning #while i begged her to please just calm down and to try taking a deep breath and to go to sleep #and then she was like - ur just like my abuser #bc she had screamed in my face which was triggering to me and i froze like a deer in the headlights #and since i had shut down at that point evidently i was the problem child #i know she is out there telling our mutual friends i abandoned her and it makes me SO pissed off #like dude you spent so much fucking time forgiving & forgetting that your decrepit asshole of a boyfriend #pushed me down in the fucking hallway #but noooo hes <3 troubled <3 at 43 and divorced #bc according to you it's important that u don't '''see anyone as a monster'' #but god forbid i not handle you SCREAMING IN MY FACE #i couldnt even get you to say sorry for crossing my original and only boundary you were like ''what did you want me to do'' #babe i said 'the bf is not allowed around here he scares me and u said ur broken up with him' #that was the thing i wanted you to do: not fucking invite him to WHERE I LIVED #godddd typing this shit out and knowing it's only 2% of what actually happened makes me feel pathetic #i can't believe i let you treat me like that. you were a TERRIBLE friend.

[yuridovewing]

i really hate how the fandom’s excuse for jayfeather’s shitty behavior (and outright medical malpractice in certain cases. looking at the time he refused to help squilf in labour bc he couldnt be bothered and later blamed her for how bad it was) is “well the clan was ableist to him growing up, so fuck them!” ok how does that excuse him screaming at and berating the cats that didnt do any of that. or the babies.

#or ‘’well hes snarky and mean! we dont get snarky and mean characters!’’ what are you talking about everyone in this series is an asshole #im also a bit bitter bc you know if he were a she cat then he’d get tons of animations of ocs killing him #ppl (fanon and authors) really really want jay to be this underdog whos just grumpy at best #but in reality hes like. one of the head honchos in the clan. he holds a ton of power over people #sure sometimes the narrative doesnt WANT that to be the case but hes literally gods messenger boy #and is in charge of medical care #maybe im just very familiar with shitty doctors/nurses who abuse their patients and excuse it with ‘’but im stressed :(‘’ #but this character never was endearing to me even before the team switch #jayfeather is not your beaten down blorbo in a shitty retail job hes the nurse making a tiktok about how cringey pregnant patients are #also i just. really despise ‘’but theyre traumatized :(‘’ as an excuse for abusive behavior #did you ever think maybe some of his patients like twigkit were traumatized by his behavior?

[wizardsix]

just saw people on twt getting mad that gale said a literal god wasn't good enough for him . i need people to understand that he didn't mean it like "I deserved more than a literal goddess" he meant that his actions were foolish and made it LOOK like he thought himself above one. that he should've been content with what he had, but felt he had to prove himself to her.

if you romance him he literally realizes that he didn't need to find validation in a god but within someone who understands humanity more than a god ever could.

please learn reading comprehension before making yourselves look stupid I'm so tired of this

#ALSO people saying that 'oh he had a literal god and wasn't satisfied' yeah lmao because she is incapable of compassion and genuine love #he literally admits that in act three. his own words #the gale slander is founded on stupid people not being able to understand how complicated this is #also yes gale DOES fall back into his power thirst in act three. because healing is not linear. #talking him down from killing himself doesn't mean he's suddenly better and over what mystra did #abuse survivors will often seek a way to gain power back. gale literally begins to resent the concept of gods and wants to destroy it #and honestly he's right. but dont tell him that #anyway gale deserves redemption #bg3 spoilers #baldur's gate 3 spoilers #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #gale dekarios #six speaks

[princeparadiso]

no childhood should be like this

#qsmp baghera #qsmp #baghera jones #qsmp fanart #baghera fanart #guess what? more qbaghera content #im starved #anyways do you ever think about how this little child harmed and abused by the very entity that created her had to live in constant edge #for all of her little life and childhood only dreaming of escapes and nicer guardians #because i do #how little was she when she was already thinking about how and when to leave this hellhole that was the only thing she ever knew #how young was she when she stole that doctor's lighter and started planning boat rides and collecting oranges #how many other experiments did she meet that disappear or died the next day? #food for thoughts

[batcavescolony]

I feel like people aren't getting it. In. The. Books. Perseus. Jackson. Is. An. Unreliable. Narrator. This goes for everything he thinks. Percy loves his mother, so he writes her praises. In the show we get to see what Sally does from an outside POV not filtered through a child that idolizes his mother. It's not ooc for Sally to act like she does in the show. she's a single mother raising a neurodivergent, Demigod, and she's scared that when the Gods get to him they'll corrupt him. She's not suddenly a girl boss we're getting to see her for how she is.

#percy jackson #sally jackson #“sHe sToOd uP tO gABe sHe wOuLdnT dO tHat' she did it because percy needed to get to montock so she could tell him about how hes a demigod #sally as a character will do anything for her son. gabe being abusive doesnt negate what she needs to. do for her son. in in the book the #second gabe was no longer needed she turned him into a statue and sold him to to the highest bidder. she was putting up with the abuse for #percys sake. and this is then woman that grebbed a gun and started fighting in the battle of Manhattan. shes not weak. you can be two things #she can be motherly and strong. and obviously she has her douts. she thinks shes failing. she called posiden when it was too much and he #reassured her she was doing her best and she needs to do what she thinks is best. and we are only seeing some scenes #we're seeing whats relevant to the plot and whats relative is sally preparing Percy. and she obviously cares for her son and her son for her #she has to be a good mother cus percy is literally going to the underworld to save her. just stfu about the book #ive read the books to but some of you are awful. like no adaptation is to the letter. somethings had to be cut or glossed over and some are #changed because money or that a book is a different medium then a show or movie! you cant do everything cus its impossible. #were in a completely different pov. we're not in Percys head seeing his thoughts. #pjo series #pjo #pjo tv show #percy jackson and the olympians #percy series #batcavescoloy watches the PJO tv show #batcavescolony watches

[petrichorium]

pluvi begging you to expand on gojo not wanting what happened to his mother to happen to you 🙏

warnings: it’s all a dream so nothing is real aside from the flashback stuff but pregnancy as horror, (sewing) needles, implied gore/eye trauma, implied child harm, gojo is messed up yo!!! and its bc of his mama!!!

he dreams about her.

it’s an odd thing, really. gojo isn’t much of a dreamer—not much of a sleeper, all things considered, but it’s difficult not to give in when you drag him to bed and curl up in his arms. the soft rise and fall of your chest, the steady thump of your heart, the sound of your breath; it soothes him into slumber.

and he dreams about her. she was always young. he’s older now than she ever got to be. frail, thin; borderline skeletal, robes hanging from her body like webbing. she sits in a chair facing a window, swathed in moonlight, the silver of her embroidery needle glinting with each stab. her face is veiled. her stomach is swollen with child.

she doesn’t turn to him, but she beckons without noise. his feet take him easily to her, and he kneels at her side as she sets aside the embroidery hoop to let him place his head on her knees.

her hand is cold as it threads through his hair. it’s gentle, at first. then harsher a moment later. she grips firm, tugs him up by those electric white threads, stares down at him through all that elaborate lace.

he imagines she’s weeping beneath it. his mother never wept before him, but she was pretty in the aftermath, eyes puffy and pink and shining. they were a cold kind of loving when they regarded him. she must have been beautiful once, elegant and lithe and willowy, cruel like the heartless sea and sharp like a brilliant diamond, but whatever was there is long gone. he thinks all sons must empty their mothers, bleed them dry from within, because his was always a shell.

she trails her hand down the side of his face, and he turns into the palm and closes his eyes, and she is silent as she sets down her embroidery to lift her veil. she is silent and hollow and eidolic as her fingers brush down his jaw and tilt his head up to look at her.

but it’s your face that he sees when he opens his eyes.

it’s your hand against his cheek, your eyes pink and puffy and pretty, your stomach bulging by his own doing. it’s your fingers that pluck up the needle, still attached to a thread of brilliant cerulean, and raise it to his eye.

his mother never was able to pierce him with that needle. she stopped herself, each and every time, dropping it and tugging him close in shame. she never doted, never was kind, but she never did manage to harm him.

you do. he lets you. it’s only fair. whatever thing is in your stomach can’t be human—whether god or demon what does it matter, at the end of the day—and didn’t he put it in you himself? if his mother never got the satisfaction of spilling his blood, shouldn’t you?

but he wakes just as the tip pierces his iris, and you hold him in your lap, eyes wide with concern and not puffy from weeping, and you hold no child within you. your hands thread through his hair and they’re warm, your lips plush when you bend to press a kiss to his brow.

he turns inward to press his face into your (empty, blissfully vacant) abdomen. the wetness he leaves there, falling from his so very coveted eyes, is colorless.

he thinks it ought to be brilliant crimson.

#ask.🌧 #saintshigaraki #cw.pregnancy #cw.child abuse #cw.trauma #cw.gore #cw.needles #char.🌧 gojo #mine.🌧 #no children #tags will have some discussion of harming others & oneself as well as poor mental health in general pls be aware #i hope u like it beloved i am suddenly very self-conscious abt this one #there were originally more examples of her nearly-harming him but i ended up rewriting the snippet to focus on the needle thing #but in my head she...... had fits where she seriously considered maiming him but stopped herself #getting very close to it in many instances #idk. to me she was MEAN and stoic and gojo's obsession with her made his doting aunties and grannies beyond furious. thats what i think #and the only reason his clan kept her around was bc she was the only thing that could stop his tantrums #bc she was ambitious and cruel and she really did fight for him when needed. she could be scary. they rlly wanted her gone #n e way. ty for ur patience i hope it was worth the wait JKHADBFV

[winepresswrath]

I will laugh so hard if it turns out that John is making a sincere effort at being a decent parent and it's such an awful outcome for Gideon that I feel like it's plausible. He's giving off such man who thinks of himself as a good guy confronted with oops baby vibes.

#like he did get babytrapped and in fact attempted baby murdered and he knows he shouldn't make it Gideon's problem so he's trying not to #but she is a walking reminder of his dead besties' murder attempt #just. the way he says no reason to be an asshole to the mother of your child #the way he's like oh no you don't have to swear loyalty to me that's an inappropriate amount of pressure to put on our relationship #very funny under the murderstances #but also these are the words of a dude who felt tremendous contempt for men who whine about child support #and yet!! he's a tremendously vindictive and self centred person. what's a guy to do #he got babytrapped and it wasn't even because they wanted him around! it's because they wanted him gone! #and his kid is the murder weapon! #how is this fair? #very fun intersection of him knowing what the correct answer most in line with his values is #with the bit where he's just wildly unqualified to do that #you've got a #sims playing alcohol abusing vengeful god in the midst of a depressive episode #taking a deep breath and attempting a child centric approach #he's not going to be good at it! #he is also not going to immediately murder her to fuck over his enemies tho so he's still winning #for now!

[laniidae-passerine]

obsessed with the idea of What Will People Think that permeates actions in Barry. even though it’s a terrible idea, Barry goes on fun runs to support the family of the guy he murdered and posts evidence of it online because he wants to be seen as a good guy. Sally’s mother being more concerned about what the women from her church might say about Joplin than about the real abuse her daughter endured, because they don’t care about that. Cousineau making an awkward public apology to Annie and then later trying to capitalise on Barry’s arrest so he can be a big hero. The big song and dance Cristobal and Hank have to do to hide their relationship and trick people into thinking they’re enemies. Fuches constantly bragging about being The Raven because he wants to be the coolest guy in the prison yard. What people think doesn’t matter. What people think means everything.

#hey bill hader man who exists in the public eye who is subject constantly to the court of public opinion #who is being analysed every day by somebody who is being followed by people with cameras #who works in comedy #let’s talk about this huh??? #help!!!!!!!!!!! #barry hbo #barry #cristobal sifuentes #noho ​hank #sally reed #monroe fuches #barry berkman #gene cousineau #also as an mixed race south asian woman the cold feeling that swept over me #when I realised that Sally’s mother didn’t care that she was abused. did you have to make it public is all. now the neighbours are talking. #What If People See? What Will They Say?

[dirtytransmasc]

saw someone say they're we're happy Alicent's and Otto's deaths forced them "realize what they had done" and like...

Otto's one thing, I get the animosity. but Alicent? your getting hot and bothered over her realizing she failed, she failed to save her children, she failed to protect them, to them alive? that she tried so hard, so fucking hard, making every hard decision, trying to get between her children and the fate they were damned to by Viserys and Rhaenyra? that she damned her kids, who were already damned to die to begin with, and had to suffer the guilt of them dying to her own hand? that she's going to drive herself mad with grief over her children, her grandchildren?

like... it's not satisfying (especially for show Alicent) watching a woman go so mad with grief it literally kills her because she fought with everything she had to save her children only for them to die anyway. ever since her father's exile, when Rhaenyra's lies took Viserys's favor, when Viserys ignored the Rhaenyra's sons bastardhood at the risk of the whole house, or when Luke took Aemond's eye and Viserys demanded good will; she knew her children's lives were forfeit. then Daemon killed Vaemond and her children's coffins were built, catching cobweb's all the while. she knew and she fought it desperately, taking risk after risk, living in fear until her moment came, she could out Aegon on the thrown, she could protect her kids, maybe, just fucking maybe they'd be safe... only for it to lead to a war that would kill her entire family.

her death, slow and tragic as it was, is heartbreaking. she didn't deserve it, she deserved to feel safe, to feel as though she could allow her past friend take the thrown without her children being at risk to feel as though she and her children weren't being circled by wolves and picked at by vulture's. she didn't deserve to live alone and die alone. she didn't deserve to have her hands coated in her children's blood.

#the fact that her (amongst many other greens deaths) get so many TB fans dicks hard is actually nauseating #like do you not realize how fucking awful her death is going to be? #like I cant imagine her pain #imagine risking it all after years of literal torture by her own families hand #her father manipulation. Viserys's abuse snd neglect. Rhaenyra's betrayal. #to save her kids #knowing they were damned #thst they would die if she didnt try #and than they died horrifically anyway #despite her efforts to save them #to be a good mother #to not fail them??? #and this isnt to blame her if that isnt clear #its just such a fucked up situation she was in #they were going to die regardless (in my opinion the war was going to happen no matter what they did and it would have claimed their lives) #but in trying to save them it felt like it was her fault #if you get what i mean #which makes her descent into madness so sickeningly horrific #alicent hightower #alicent my beloved #pro team green #pro alicent hightower #hotd #house of the dragon

[aleksanderscult]

Today I will rant because I want to about that character and how he's treated by some

Lately the rapist comments about him and how he was selfish are getting multiplied which makes me both angry and sad.

When you have the author itself say that she saw the King and Queen as the real villains and that we can make a case about the Darkling's worst crimes then how do some people indirectly call him the worst thing that happened to Ravka and to Alina?

They only treat Aleksander as a villain, emphasizing his sexually creepy moments and selfish motivations and completely disregard the human side of him or his traumatic past.

The Darkling did not spend 500 (and possibly more) years of his life to protect his people and stop the wars for you to call him a selfish evil man. If you want to call someone selfish then look at Baghra that stays warm in her hearth and not giving a single fuck for Ravka. If you want to call someone selfish then take a look at the King and Queen who grow fat and rich while their people and starving and think that being orphaned is "marvelous". If you want to call someone selfish then look at Mal who wanted to leave Ravka and never look back (and in the meantime, it was his country that was in danger) or even Alina.

The Darkling was quite literally the only person that decided to take action for a persecuted group of people without wavering once.

You don't give a single glimpse at his tragic elements. You ignore them. But his isolated and traumatic childhood, abusive mother figure, near-immortality that made him witness people he loved die, rare powers that have isolated him further and desperation to see the Grisha being respected and accepted says hello 🙋.

You call us fans of the category "The Darkling did nothing wrong". Well, just because we don't talk about his crimes every day does not mean we don't know about them. We just decide to talk about the Darkling in our blogs as a human, tragic figure that was much more complex than his "evil" actions. If we wanted to read about the Darkling and his evilness we would read KoS and RoW everyday. Zoya, Tolya and Genya were orators of that. But maybe we just decided to look deeper than this. To cast light to the parts he kept hidden and were so human and still valid.

Some call us even misogynistic for judging Alina. I didn't know that just because we judge one fictional, female character means that we hate all women. Wow. For your information, most of the times we judge the way she was handled by the author more than the character herself.

But having people making the Darkling a simple villain with no humanity is probably one of the worst butchering of a character I've ever seen.

Some people literally took an intriguing, complex character with selfless motivations and turned him into a power-hungry tyrant. Bye guys 💀

I don't know. If you expect from me at least to post about how the Darkling was evil, a tyrant and a rapist then you are on the wrong page. I only write about the Darkling as human most of all. With tragic elements and human emotions and vulnerabilities that were actually there. But some people cannot read past the word "villain".

#“But...but...what he did to Alina...” #What he *really* did to Alina was to open her eyes to the truth and she only kept them closed until the very end #The fact that you are stuck only in his “sexually abusive” ways is stupid and childish #the darkling #pro darkling #aleksander morozova #pro aleksander morozova #alina starkov #darklina #pro darklina #shadow and bone #grishaverse trilogy #grishaverse

[uselessnbee]

what i wish people would also explore more when it comes to Percy is the other side of his feelings about his mom about family and his childhood but this fandom is too afraid to paint Sally even in the slightest bad light (even if it's not bad just acknowledging her flaws because she's a human being and not perfect) that no one will touch on that subject. like yes Sally is the best mom but she also isn't and that's the thing! She isn't perfect! but she tried her best but her best still got Percy hurt and it isn't her fault at all but that's the tragedy of it. i want Percy's feelings about this explored. how he grew up with a loving mom but an abusive step father. how his step father would humiliate him and call him stupid but then his mom soothed him and told him he's not the things Gabe calls him. how Gabe would hurt him and Sally would be there to make him happy and loved but at the same time she stayed with him. i want Percy's feelings explored about how he knows his mother loves him but her absence still hurt him. she would work so much to have money to raise him she did that for him but at the same time it meant Percy was left alone or with Gabe. Sally gave up so much for him, she sent him away to protect him but at the same time he was sent away from his mom. she's the only parent he has because his father is absent and Gabe is not actually a parental figure at all but she's also often absent in his life too and that must have left him with such mixed feelings because it's not all black and white! Sally's love protected him but also hurt him. Percy loves his mom so so so much but there's also this deep-seated bitterness and hurt and anger he never let himself feel and then the guilt for having those feelings because his mom loves him he knows that and she gave up so much for him and she married a monster that abused her to protect him, he knows that but it doesn't make it hurt any less. the mess his emotions are because he knows his mom suffered for him and did it from her love for him but he still desperately wishes she never married that monster that he wouldn't have to have the childhood he had with him that he wouldn't have to live with the trauma he was left with. this all is exactly what makes their relationship so fascinating and also heartbreaking.

or the idea of Percy having weird mixed feelings after Estelle is born because that's his little sister and he loves her with his whole heart and would do anything for her and wants only the best for her but there's also this little jealous monster deep down that wonders why she gets to have a loving mom and a loving dad and a happy normal life but he never got that. why does she deserve it but not him? why couldn't he have that too? doesn't he deserve that too? he was just a child too so why why why??? and then the guilt of feeling that way too it makes me want to scream. emotions are fucking messy and they can be really ugly and they can make you hate yourself and there's no way Percy's feelings aren't a mess when it comes to this and i want to see it explored so badly!

and with Sally too! her feelings about Percy because she did so much and tried her best but sometimes unfortunately your best isn't good enough and it still got her beloved son hurt and she hates it and feels so guilty but she just has to live with that but she can't help to wish it was different. that their lives would be different. better. normal. she can't help but to wish she didn't have to do the things she's done, didn't have to suffer so much just to protect her child. can't help to wish she didn't have to worry so much, didn't have to be so scared about Percy, didn't have to be terrified that one day he won't come back home to her, that she won't be able to hold her son anymore because he will be gone, she just wishes he didn't have to suffer so much, she just wishes and wishes and wishes

and i just wish people weren't so afraid to explore this because it's so heartwrenching and yes if you want something do it yourself but unfortunately i cannot write nor am i able to handle this topic in a way it deserves so i am left only with rambling about it on here thank you

#i am not trying to victim blame or anything i love Sally and she did her best and didn't deserve any of the crap life gave her #but there's just something so tragic about the fact that she married a vile man and suffered abuse to protect her son #just for her decision to hurt him anyways just in a different way but the only other option would probably be Percy ending up dead #so she can't really truly regret it but she just wishes those weren't their only options #that she didn't have to do this just so that her child could stay alive #thinking about it makes me go feral #they had no choice but to suffer there was no way for their lives to be without this much hurt and trauma and it's terrible #and they didn't deserve it but there was so much love too #but the horrible thing is that that love just wasn't enough to save them from all that pain and i need to be sedated bye #percy jackson #sally jackson #pjo #hoo #percy and sally #percy jackon and the olympians #whatever you do don't think about a six years old lonely Percy sitting in a corner waiting for his mom to come back home from work #and he knows she loves him but he misses her so much when she spends so much time in work and that hurts #don't think about a ten years old Percy being sent away to a boarding school and he knows his mom loves him #but what if she's sending him away because he's just too much? or not enough? and what if she doesn't want him anymore? #and he knows that's not true but what if? #i'm thinking it #okay i think that's enough

[tysonfurybattlepass]

lancer hot take GO

1. CRIMINALLY underrated as a key player in the narrative. so often in fan content, he’s relegated to comic relief when in reality his character arc is the fucking CO-FOCAL POINT of ch1 (alongside susie’s)

but where susie learns that opposition isn’t always the answer, and it can lead to her hurting people she loves, lancer learns that the authority figure in his life isn’t omnipotent and perfect and he can stand up for what he knows is just. he can question the adult in his life he can BE HIS OWN PERSON and he doesn’t have to feel like he’s not good enough. fuck. not personal or anything prommy (lying)

2. i think he should be allowed to KILL. queen will livestream it. shit would be funny as fuck

#fr though i rly hope toby does something w lancer either narritavely #or as a side thing about his recovery arc #because like. thats not the end right? #hes in a better situation now but what about the psychological effect of All That #even if you dont accept my/meatloaf’s hc #that spade always believed lancer to be the Prince Of Legend and thus tried to supress him #abusing him solely to circumvent the prophecy by removing a key player #the entire debacle on the rooftop at the emd of ch1 was traumatizing enough for lancer #i think he deserves to express the less cute/silly side of his trauma #maybe even do something DAMAGING #i understand and love susie despite what she did in ch1 #i would understand and love lancer too if he made bad decisions or caused problems #as an expression of what he’s been through #because christ almighty he’s been so mature for so long #god damn #anyway #deltarune #jordan talks

[himehomu]

Homura did nothing wrong. And I stand by that. Because, she didn't do anything wrong towards anyone nor did she do anything with malicious intent. The only thing she did wrong is entirely in regards to herself. Rather than basing Homura's entire character around an act she made out of love or reduce her character to an evildoer with no morals nor love in her heart like some people still do to this day under the poor facade of “valid criticism,” I'm going to explain what Homura actually did wrong in Rebellion and her what her act of selfishness actually was.

What Homura did wrong was condemn herself to suffering as an immortal deity, the Devil whom acts as a rebellion against God, The Law of Cycles, strict laws of the original universe, which included Madoka Kaname not existing. That is what she did wrong, but not in the black and white, Good-vs-Evil way most people interpret this as. Yes, they are meant to be enemies one day, but because God favors rules and always doing the right thing, whereas the Devil favors her desire to stay in a world where Madoka is happy, where her friends are happy, where they are safe and have a chance at a life. A desire for happiness vs maintaining order of a broken world for the greater good, even if maintaining order means making sacrifices and making hard choices that directly rebel against that desire and yearning for happiness.

But, here is why Homura is wrong in dooming herself to her fate as the Devil. It's very subtle, but seconds before the Flower Field scene, as they are walking, Madoka turns and tells Homura that it really hurts her seeing her in so much pain and not being able to do anything about it. This may seem like a simple thing a friend would say, but remember that Madoka lost her memories as a goddess. And, as a goddess, she was stuck alone in Heaven having to watch life go by, Homura's life go by, and wasn't able to interfere. Think about that for a second. Think about being Madokami.

Think about when she could finally understand just how much Homura did for her, just how much Homura fought for her in all those time loops; the moment she's able to reciprocate her feelings, she fades from existence as the consequence. Wanting so badly to comfort Homura as she bears the psychological burden of being the only person to remember her, to know her, to miss her, to grieve and mourn her. Thinking the only time she’ll ever be able to see let alone talk to Homura again is when she’s essentially dying from all the grief, the pain, the guilt, the sadness of not being able to save her from her fate of being a goddess trapped in isolation. Think about that, then look at what she says here again. Of course it hurts Madoka seeing Homura hurting so badly and feeling powerless to do anything about it. Because that's what she's been doing as The Law of Cycles. Much like how she said she'd never make the decision to become a Goddess in the first place a few seconds later, she says this because this is the real Madoka who loves and cherishes Homura, who hates to see her hurt.

Take that into consideration when looking at what Homura turns herself into at the end of Rebellion, how she's suffering and you can see the exhaustion on her face and in her eyes, how you can see the immortality essentially sucking the humanity out of her to the point where she herself believes she is evil. This was never about Good vs. Evil. This is about Homura hating herself so much not only for being unable to save Madoka, but possibly even for loving her in the first place considering her love is what made her powerful enough to condemn herself to her fate as a Goddess trapped in Heaven with her wish. This is about Madoka hating herself so much to where she only deems herself worthy so long as she's helping others, her self-loathing making her reduce herself to a sacrificial lamb and throwing away her life for the better of everyone else, caring so little for herself and being unable to even fathom that she'd be mourned or grieved if she were to die, thus sacrificing herself over and over, seeing herself as a means to an end if it means freedom for everyone she loves. Madoka has always been there to comfort Homura and protect her since the first timeline. How can she do that if her memories and powers to do so are locked away? She can't. Because Homura doesn't believe she deserves Madoka's love.

Homura doesn't believe she's worth Madoka's sacrifice in becoming a God and Madoka doesn't believe she's worth Homura's sacrifice in becoming the Devil. Madoka cannot understand that she is so so much more than what she can give to other people whilst Homura is the only one that does. Homura can't understand that dooming herself to immortality pains and hurts Madoka because she can't do anything about it thus she can't save her from her suffering like how Homura ceased her suffering. It's a cycle. A snake eating it's own tail. A pumpkin that spins round and round and round. They're both selfish and they're both selfless. Homura is selfish in the sense that she's not taking into consideration how Madoka would feel if she knew how much she were suffering as the Devil for her sake yet she is being selfless because she's only suffering as the Devil for Madoka and her family and their friends to have a happy life. Madoka is selfish in the same sense that she's not taking into consideration just how psychologically damaging it is for Homura to not only have to watch her die over and over again throughout 100 timelines but to then erase herself from existence with Homura being the only one to remember her and she is selfless by of course only sacrificing herself so much because she cares for everyone and all Magical Girls, Homura especially included. They both love each other enough to sacrifice themselves for the other but they both hate themselves so much to where they believe they are undeserving of the other's love hence they keep dooming themselves to suffering in isolation and in turn dooming each other.

#pmmm #puella magi madoka magica #puella magi madoka magica rebellion #mahou shoujo madoka magica #madoka magica #madomagi #pmmm rebellion #madoka magica rebellion #madoka kaname #homura akemi #madohomu #i dont wanna say they invented doomed yuri but at the same time.... #did homura do anything morally wrong? no. she did something wrong in terms of dooming herself to internal psychological suffering #which is something madoka outright says hurts her to see homura go through whilst not being able to do anything about it #homura took away madoka's agency to help her because she feels she deserves this for madoka's sake #homura didn't trap madoka she trapped herself and locked madoka out so that she can't interfere bc she wants her to have a normal life #homura is really not the abusive monster y'all make her out to be the only person she's abusing is herself #she's my self destructive pookie bear and what about it #cw long post

[arkiwii]

Kristen Arknights is giving me brainworms this cannot continue

Before Lone Trail, I was really convinced that "ah yeah so she's really evil", like what, she approved and conducted the Diabolic Experiment? She approved the experiment at Site #359 and was probably looking at the giant Hub from her window, presumably while eating popcorns, and when Saria arrived to scream at her "WHAT THE FUCK" Kristen just replied "Oh hey I knew you would solve it"? She also funded Loken's Watertank and collected his data on children experiments after he got arrested??

Any sane person would be calling her an egoist, a betrayer, a seeker, a loner

And yet, she was a pioneer.

Lone Trail dropped and now, I don't even know what to think anymore of this character. Like I don't approve what she has done, but also, I don't hate her. She put me into a state of mind I can't think straight anymore. This dog is TRULY fucked up.

She was obsessed, truly obsessed by her dream. She wanted to achieve what her parents had failed to do. She wanted to honor her family, to prove something to the world. To find the truth. To break the sky.

And she fucking did it. She absolutely did. She achieved it, she had done what nobody has ever done before. Regardless of the methods, regardless of morals and ethics, what she did was HUGE. That night, everyone on Terra looked up at the sky. She made a huge step forward, she revolutioned and changed things. The moment she pierced the starpod, a page in the history of the world had been turned, a new era has started. This event was major. And countless scientists will look up upon her, and for ages, her name will be praised.

And she did at what cost? Everything. Her own life, her friends.

I can't stop thinking about how much she tried to keep Saria away from her. I thought that Kristen was using Saria, that she didn't care about her, but actually it's... Something else. She does care about Saria, but it's Saria who was completely obsessed with Kristen. It's Saria who refused to let go. Of course, Saria devoted her life to protect Kristen, she wanted to stay with her until the very end. Kristen did not wanted it, she wanted Saria to continue to live on. It's her dream, and she's ready to die to achieve it. Not Saria's. Nor Muelsyse's.

I can't stop thinking about how she tried EVERYTHING to stop Saria. She studied her Arts, found ways to supress them, created Power Armors to neutralize them, she showed coldness to Saria to keep her away. But god, Saria was clingy as hell. If Kristen had to get to install a trap door in her spaceship SPECIFICALLY for Saria, that's to say how much Saria did not want to let go.

Saria was ready to die for Kristen, she was ready to stay with her until the very end. But Kristen always had in mind to go alone.

And in the end, she had to show Saria that she deserves to live, to continue, that there's still people who need her. Rhine Lab needs her. Ifrit needs her. Silence needs her. Rhodes Island needs her. She can't join Kristen like that. She can't die yet.

Even if Kristen was obsessed by her dream, she was still able to care enough for Saria and the people around her.

And god fucking damn I'm crying

Kristen is absolutely the best antagonist of all Arknights there's absolutely no way we can't do better, I'm standing on my ground

#I'm just throwing away my thoughts because I need to let them go #if you remember my post before about what I think of Saria and Kristen's relationship #I was very wrong #I really thought it was abusive/toxic #but actually it's SO complex #Jesus I wanna analyze this woman with a microscope #there's no cure for her #I'M BARKING AND SCREAMING #she said “oh yeah sciences requiees sacrifices ?” #“aight imma be this sacrifice then” #GOD SHE FUCKING DID IT #Lone Trail has been out for a week and I am still crying about it send tweet #arknights #help me

[thatpurpledudetrey]

nesta literally telling feyre that shes going to fucking died from the babe in an unpleasant way is literally just an argumental point for rhys stans to use to cover up the fact he LITERALLY hide a medical information from feyre?!?!?!? bro HE was the on who started this shit not fucking nesta????

it was rhysand's fault, he started this shit by being a stupid bitch who decided to not tell feyre

#anti feysand #neutral feyre #anti rhysand #anti acotar #pro nesta archeron #pro nesta #pro archeron sisters #“but what if shes stressed?” SHE LITERALLY FACED THE FUCKING WEAVER AND DIED SAVING PRYTHIAN SHE'LL FUCKING LIVE IF SHE WAS TOLD ABOUT THIS #none of this wouldnt been a fucking problem if RHYSAND ISNT A FUCKING ABUSER #actually NO ALL OF THIS WOULDNT HAPPEN IF FEYRE JUST FUCKING KILL HIM #KILL THAT BITCH FEYRE U DESERVED TO #RUNAWAY AND LIVE FREELY GIRL #FREE MY GIRL FEYRE!!!!!!!! #the fact stans ignored that nesta literally apologized to feyre in acosf and rhysand has not ONCE spat out the word “sorry” IN ANY OF THE #FUCKING SERIES #LITERALLY IN CHAPTER 54 ACOMAF ALL HE DO IS YAP YAP AND BLAB BLAB LIEK SHUT THE FUCK UP U STUPID BITCH #“i have a sad backstory :((( pls excused my horrid actions :(((” WOMP WOMP BITCH #you guys need to remember that rhysand has never ONCE apologized for all the horrible actions he did to feyre #yall claim to be feyre stans and proceed to defend this shit is fucking gross #sorry for this very angry rant in the tags yall