codylwrites - Tumblr blog

codylwrites · 1 year

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woke up and someone spilled vanilla extract all over my dash, so as punishment you strange little beasties are getting all the VANILLA FACTS i know:

vanilla is the 2nd most expensive spice in the world (2nd to saffron)

which is why more than 99% of what we call "vanilla extract" is actually vanillin (vanilla's dominant flavor compound) and is not extracted from real vanilla.

luckily, even professionals struggle to tell the difference when it comes to things like baked goods. but there is a distinct difference in non-heat treated products like vanilla ice cream. real vanilla has a more complex, individualized flavor profile.

why is vanilla so expensive? because it is a ridiculously delicate & demanding crop. complete primadonna.

vanilla beans come from vanilla orchids. these crazy flowers bloom for A SINGLE DAY and have to be HAND-POLLINATED in a process that is exhausting, delicate, and requires specialist knowledge passed down over generations.

then, if you're lucky, you get vanilla beans.

which then require months of further specialized treatment.

the entire process takes about a year and can go wrong at any stage

vanilla has been cultivated for over 800 years (possibly much longer). the first known cultivators are the Totonac, an indigenous people of Mexico.

the Aztecs used it as a sweetener to balance out the bitter taste of cocoa. it was popular in a drink called xocolatl--the precursor to modern hot chocolate!

it is only pollinated by a very specific orchid bee!!!

which is why no fruit could be grown outside of Mexico until the 1800s

Edmond Albius, born into slavery, invented the pollination method we still use today--launching a global industry when he was just 12 years old.

today, the majority of the world's vanilla is grown in Madagascar

if you want real vanilla, read the labels carefully--it's harder to find than you think!

in conclusion, those tiny black specks you see in fancy vanilla ice cream? those are vanilla bean seeds! itty bitty orchid seeds!!! they are delicious and also a PRISSY BITCH!

(src)

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codylwrites · 2 years

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GlOw In ThE dArK pArTy SnAkE pLuShIe?!?!?!?!

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codylwrites · 2 years

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New Sparkly Rainbow Galaxy Party Snakes available now! He literally sparkles! LOVE him!

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codylwrites · 2 years

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Ayoooo Party Snake Plushies now available in 5 Colours!

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codylwrites · 2 years

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Why does this KILL me tho…

#funny #meme #dankest #lol #memes #dank #dank memes #dankest memes #funny memes #funny pictures #rami #rami malek #clickhole #celebrity #mr robot

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codylwrites · 2 years

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Sylvester Stallone is unhinged

#funny #meme #dankest #lol #memes #dank #dank memes #dankest memes #funny memes #funny pictures #sylvester stallone #Instagram #dumb #unhinged #celebrity #celebrities

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codylwrites · 2 years

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New Party Snakes available on my Etsy Store!

Introducing the Watermelon Bliss Party Snake Plushie and the Baby Blues Party Snake Plushie!

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codylwrites · 2 years

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This is the list of music that make me feel like the villian or will make you feel like the coolest (and crazy) badass Queen / King that you are.

2YA2YAO! - Super Junior

Ain't My Fault- Zara Larsson

All the Time 2 - Wintertime

Bad Blood - Taylor Swift

Black Widow - Iggy Azalea ft. Rita Ora

Castle - Halsey

Cradles - Sub Urban

Crazy=Genius - Panic at The Disco!

Cooler Than Me - Lucky Luke

Diamonds - Sam Smith

Do Me a Favor - Arctic Monkeys

Don't Threaten Me With a Good Time - Panic at The Disco!

Double Knot - Stray Kids

Emperor's New Clothes - Panic at The Disco!

Everybody Knows - Sigrid

Ex's and Oh's - Elle King

Formation - Beyonce

Heart Shape Box - Nirvana

Heathens - Twenty One Pilots

Heavydirtysoul - Twenty One Pilots

Hell or Hallelujah - KISS

Homemade Dynamite - Lorde ft Khalid

Horns - Bryce Fox

How You Like That - BLACKPINK

Humble - Kendrick Lamar

In My Feelings - Lana Del Rey

John Wayne - Lady Gaga

Kanye's in My Head - Boy Epic

Kill this Love - BLACKPINK

Love Killa - MONSTA X

Me, Myself & I - G-Eazy ft Bebe Rexha

Meltdown - Stromae ft Lorde

Mount Everest - Labrinth

Nate Growing Up - Labrinth

Natural - Imagine Dragons

Nigthmare -Halsey

Obsession - EXO

Old Town Road - Lil Nax X ft Billy Ray Cyrus

Panda - Desiigner

Pirate King - ATEEZ

Power is Power - SZA, The Weeknd & Travis Scott

Pray for Me - The Weekend ft Kendrick Lamar

Pretty Savage - BLACKPINK

Pumped up Kicks - Foster of the People

Quarantine - Boy Epic

Ready for This - Taylor Swift

Sacrifice - Bebe Rexha

Sally Walker - Iggy Azalea

Sleeping Powder- Gorillaz

So What - Pink

Start a Riot - Duckwrth ft Shaboozey

Started - Iggy Azalea

Sucker for Pain - Lil Wayne, Wiz Khalifa & Imagine Dragons w/ Logic & Ty Dolla $ign ft X Ambassadors

Sympathy for the Devil - The Rolling Stones

Teeth - 5 Seconds of Summer

This is America - Childish Gambino

Toxic - Britney Spears

Victorious - Panic at The Disco!

War Machine - KISS

What I Know Now - THEY ft Wiz Khalifa

When I R.I.P. - Labrinth

Wicked Games - The Weekend

Wolf - Boy Epic

Wonderland - ATEEZ

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codylwrites · 2 years

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A Beautiful Day in the Neighbourhood is just a softcore Silence of the Lambs

#funny #meme #dankest #lol #memes #dank #dank memes #dankest memes #funny memes #silence of the lambs #Hannibal #hannibal lector #a beautiful day in the neighbourhood #mr rogers #Netflix #movies #movie

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codylwrites · 2 years

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Ayyy finally have some new listings on my Etsy store! Pastel Spider Plushie and Baby Rainbow Party Snake!

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codylwrites · 2 years

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ICONIC BEHAVIOR!

#will smith #chris rock #jada pinkett smith #king richard #oscars #WHO CAN SAY THE SAME?

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codylwrites · 2 years

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Words to replace said, except this actually helps

I got pretty fed up with looking for words to replace said because they weren’t sorted in a way I could easily use/find them for the right time. So I did some myself.

IN RESPONSE TO Acknowledged Answered Protested

INPUT/JOIN CONVERSATION/ASK Added Implored Inquired Insisted Proposed Queried Questioned Recommended Testified

GUILTY/RELUCTANCE/SORRY Admitted Apologized Conceded Confessed Professed

FOR SOMEONE ELSE Advised Criticized Suggested

JUST CHECKING Affirmed Agreed Alleged Confirmed

LOUD Announced Chanted Crowed

LEWD/CUTE/SECRET SPY FEEL Appealed Disclosed Moaned

ANGRY FUCK OFF MATE WANNA FIGHT Argued Barked Challenged Cursed Fumed Growled Hissed Roared Swore

SMARTASS Articulated Asserted Assured Avowed Claimed Commanded Cross-examined Demanded Digressed Directed Foretold Instructed Interrupted Predicted Proclaimed Quoted Theorized

ASSHOLE Bellowed Boasted Bragged

NERVOUS TRAINWRECK Babbled Bawled Mumbled Sputtered Stammered Stuttered

SUAVE MOTHERFUCKER Bargained Divulged Disclosed Exhorted

FIRST OFF Began

LASTLY Concluded Concurred

WEAK PUSY Begged Blurted Complained Cried Faltered Fretted

HAPPY/LOL Cajoled Exclaimed Gushed Jested Joked Laughed

WEIRDLY HAPPY/EXCITED Extolled Jabbered Raved

BRUH, CHILL Cautioned Warned

ACTUALLY, YOU’RE WRONG Chided Contended Corrected Countered Debated Elaborated Objected Ranted Retorted

CHILL SAVAGE Commented Continued Observed Surmised

LISTEN BUDDY Enunciated Explained Elaborated Hinted Implied Lectured Reiterated Recited Reminded Stressed

BRUH I NEED U AND U NEED ME Confided Offered Urged

FINE Consented Decided

TOO EMO FULL OF EMOTIONS Croaked Lamented Pledged Sobbed Sympathized Wailed Whimpered

JUST SAYING Declared Decreed Mentioned Noted Pointed out Postulated Speculated Stated Told Vouched

WASN’T ME Denied Lied

EVIL SMARTASS Dictated Equivocated Ordered Reprimanded Threatened

BORED Droned Sighed

SHHHH IT’S QUIET TIME Echoed Mumbled Murmured Muttered Uttered Whispered

DRAMA QUEEN Exaggerated Panted Pleaded Prayed Preached

OH SHIT Gasped Marveled Screamed Screeched Shouted Shrieked Yelped Yelled

ANNOYED Grumbled Grunted Jeered Quipped Scolded Snapped Snarled Sneered

ANNOYING Nagged

I DON’T REALLY CARE BUT WHATEVER Guessed Ventured

I’M DRUNK OR JUST BEING WEIRDLY EXPRESSIVE FOR A POINT/SARCASM Hooted Howled Yowled

I WONDER Pondered Voiced Wondered

OH, YEAH, WHOOPS Recalled Recited Remembered

SURPRISE BITCH Revealed

IT SEEMS FAKE BUT OKAY/HA ACTUALLY FUNNY BUT I DON’T WANT TO LAUGH OUT LOUD Scoffed Snickered Snorted

BITCHY Tattled Taunted Teased

Edit: People, I’m an English and creative writing double major in college; I understand that there’s nothing wrong with simply using “said.” This was just for fun, and it comes in handy when I need to add pizzazz.

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codylwrites · 3 years

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Ayyyy Pastel Spider Plushie now available on my Etsy Store.

I love him.