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devilberries · 3 years

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Confessing to Bakugo (MAJOR ANGST) w/ female reader

“I…”

Her words trailed off. She looked down, voice shaking and hands trembling. Her heart pounded, and pounded, and pounded.

It was finally time to confess to Bakugo.

Y/N had liked him the moment she saw him at the entrance test to UA. His unflinching confidence, the way he flew through the sky, smashing down the giant test bots. Although, he was definitely a bit of an asshole, not caring about anyone who got caught in the blow of his quirk.

But she saw through his cold personality.

She knew he was an asshole, and she knew he always yelled at others for being weak, calling them extras. Even so, she also saw someone who was insecure, someone who always tried really hard. She could tell he only called others extras because he was scared of becoming one himself. She could see how he felt so inferior towards Midoriya, how that always ruins his day. She could hear the the determination in his voice. When he said he’d do something, he never failed to disappoint.

She just simply fell in love with him.

It wasn’t just the fact that he was so amazing; he also made her want to be amazing too. When he spent his free time training, she decided to train too. When he spent his lunch studying, she would study too.

Sometimes, she would gather the courage to ask him for help on homework. Though, it ends up being him yelling at her for not getting something so easily, and she ends up somewhere close to crying. But it always made her feel better when he quietly mumbled things like, “If you don’t get things like this, go ask the teacher. Or maybe ask someone for their notes- you know what? Fuck it, take my notes instead! And make sure you learn the material this time, loser!”

And, now, here she was, standing in front of Bakugo outside of their class in the hall. All Might ran off somewhere with Midoriya accompanying him, so everyone had free-time to do whatever.

The hall was quiet, silent, and still. Bakugo stared at her with the same frown and furrowed eyebrows. She’d sometimes mistaken that look for a glare, but it’s just Bakugo being Bakugo.

He grumbled, “Are you gonna tell me or not? I have other things to do than just lounging around here.”

Her heart throbbed at his cruel words, but she buried those feelings down like she always did.

Thump, thump.

Taking a deep breath, she looked up at him.

“I… I like you, Bakugo. I- I really like you.”

His eyes widened at her words, like a shock, but she watched it twist into horror.

“What?”

Her mouth opened, then closed. She didn’t know what to say to that. She tried to form the right words, panic rising in her chest.

“I just… needed to tell you this.”

“You shouldn’t have told me.”

Her heart stopped.

She tried to smile as the corner of her lips twitched to go back into a frown, “What do you mean?”

“You just shouldn’t have. I don’t have anything to fucking tell you.”

He turned, stepping towards the door to their class.

“Bakugo, wait!” His unmerciful eyes met hers as his hand hovered next to the door. “I… you… I haven’t said what I wanted to say yet!”

He let out a harsh sigh before growling, “Alright, then fucking say it. And make it quick.”

This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. This wasn’t how she wanted it to be. She thought he’d listen at the very least, but it seemed like nothing was getting through to him.

She clenched her fists, eyes watering. Opening her mouth, she tried to speak. She really tried, but all the words were caught in her throat. The only sounds coming out were pathetic sobs as tears streamed down her cheeks.

Y/N covered her face, embarrassed and heartbroken.

The door slid open and closed. That was when every thing she tried to hold together collapsed.

She crouched down and bawled. Her voice echoed down the hall.

“But I love you…” she whispered to herself.

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devilberries · 3 years

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Baizhu edit !!!

Also on my YouTube

https://youtube.com/channel/UCUlXcJfSRUBtVxaj

[song no guidance remix Ayzha Nyree]

#Genshin impact #Genshin #Genshin dendro #Dendro #baizhu #tot vyn #baizhu genshin impact #baizhu dendro

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devilberries · 3 years

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Ei (Raiden Shogun) x Lumine angst

*warning character death and HEAVY ANGST*

“Ei!”

Lumine shrieked as the electricity surged through her. Her body shook as the shock ran throughout her body. She slammed her sword into the concrete, hoisting herself up. Her steps stumbled, but the Raiden Shogun showed no mercy.

“To think that I believed you and your pathetic ways. This…” the Raiden Shogun looked into the deep indigo sky, which flickered with her bright, neon purple lightning. “Inazuma can only reach eternity once you are gone.”

The Traveler heaved; she was growing weak. Their battle lasted for hours, but she knew she couldn’t last any longer. It was exhausting. Her body ached as blood from her cuts licked against what was left of her untouched skin. Lumine’s heart pounded on and on and so did the throb in her head. How could she beat against an Archon? Against someone she grew a bond with? Against the person she gave her heart and soul to?

“Don’t do this, Ei,” she said firmly as her body trembled, barely standing up against her sword. “You remember, right? It was the Fatui who almost took Inazuma from you, and now, they’re trying to do it again. You have to believe me. I promise I’m on your side, just listen, please!”

The Archon’s eyes sparked with fury. The ground shook as thunder roared. Her lightning flickered and flickered, and the purple light kissed her skin. Lumine felt her heart drop when the Raiden Shogun pulled out Musou no Hitotachi.

“How did I look past you? You’re a mistake, a threat to eternity. You’re an exception, and exceptions will always be in the way of reaching eternity.”

Lumine whimpered, “Please come back, Ei.”

The Raiden Shogun took her time walking towards Lumine, dragging her great blade against the concrete.

“Ei.”

Click.

“Y-you can hear me right?”

Clack.

“Ei…!”

Click.

“Please, come out of Euthymia. Just this once…!”

Click. Clack. Click. Clack. The sound of her heels echo like the hand of clock ticking, or like a bomb counting down to its demise. Lumine’s heart raced. She couldn’t move out of fear but also out of exhaustion. Her body would collapse the moment she let go of her sword.

Zzzap!

Her shrill voice pierced the air. Lumine collapsed, barely holding herself up on all fours. She sucked in whatever oxygen she could get, saliva and blood dripping from her mouth. Her body twitched harshly as her energy gave out.

Lumine could barely make out the red laced heels in front of her. A hand grabbed her neck, harshly pulling her up to face the Raiden Shogun. The blonde girl could only grip against the Archon’s wrists for support as she was hanging, her toes barely reaching the ground. She felt Musou no Hitotachi poking against her hip, and a wave of dread swallowed her whole.

“E-Ei! You’re not gonna actually hurt me, right?” With whatever strength she had left in her, Lumine caressed the Raiden Shogun’s wrist. “I-“ She couldn’t finish her sentence, choking on her own words. Her lips gasped for air as she pleaded for mercy. “Ei! P-Please…!”

All of a sudden, the world felt cold. Colder than it already was, but it was also wet. Wet, but there was no rain. It was blood. Blood was seeping into her dress, spilling from Musou no Hitotachi.

Lumine wanted to scream. She wanted to fight back. She wanted to say something, anything…! She wanted to tell Ei that it hurt, it hurt to be stabbed. She wanted everything to be fine, so that in the future, she could laugh about this and tease Ei.

She wanted to drink more dango milk with Ei. She wanted to do so many things with her, like hold her hands, which always gave a small shock every time Lumine brushed against them. She wanted to be held by her, but also hug her because she knew how hard it can be for Ei. She wanted to kiss the Archon, oh, Heavens, she wanted to kiss her so bad.

But she couldn’t.

Lumine’s body crashed against the concrete when the Raiden Shogun let go of her neck. Her cheeks were wet from streams of tears and the blood that was pooling besides her.

The Archon turned around, walking away. Lumine tried to reach out to her, to do anything to stop her, but in reality, there was nothing she could do at all.

Her eyes blinked away the tears. Her vision grew hazy as she slowly closed her eyelids, giving into the exhaustion. She prayed that this was all a nightmare.

Click. Clack. Click Clack. Click.

Clack.

Clickclackclickclackclickclackclickclackclickclackclickclackclickclackclickclackclickclacklicklacklickclickclackclickclackkiclclickaclkaciiclciclcicclkckkckalicckalcckckckckclicklcackclickaclkcaiclkclacilkaclakclacikcl-

“Lumine!”

Finally, there was warmth against her. It made it a bit easier for her to drift off to sleep.

“No, no, no! Don’t close your eyes. Come on…! Wake up.”

The Traveler felt her body shake. Side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side to side-

Her eyes fluttered open. There she was, the Archon she fell for, right in front of her, bawling her eyes out.

“I didn’t mean to do that! I… I couldn’t control it… I…”

Eli’s words stopped when Lumine’s hand came up besides her cheek, wiping away a tear.

“It’s okay… I… love you. Please don’t… blame… your…self.”

Ei. It meant eternity. Everyone knew how crazy she was about eternity, especially Traveler. Still, the girl managed to convince her that eternity didn’t matter, at least to her, and the Archon believed her. She was the exception, so of course, eternity didn’t need to apply to her.

Lumine said love was eternal, even when people disappear. Ei remembered her smile as she remembered her brother. She saw the love surging within her. It was so powerful, more powerful than life or death. It gave Ei hope to ease the guilt within her, that maybe she wasn’t the reason why everyone around her died, that it was okay for her to be happy even if they were gone.

Thud.

There was no such thing as eternity, no matter how hard she tried to achieve it. She knew, despite taking things to the extreme, but nothing was eternal. Not her friends, not her sister, not Inazuma.

Not even the hand that had just caressed her cheek.

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devilberries · 3 years

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He taught me how to sing

By devilberries

pov Mafuyu

He taught me how to sing,

He gave me the voice I have now,

He put the syllables in my mouth,

Made me wrap the words with my tongue,

Taste the sweetness it left behind,

He taught me how to sing,

Made me feel like someone was clenching my heart,

Made me feel like someone was pulling words out of my mouth,

Made me feel the tears streaming out of my eyes as if someone was ripped away from me

Only that someone was him.

He taught me how to sing,

But singing won’t wake him up.

He taught me how to sing,

So I’m singing.

I’m singing like my life depends on it.

He taught me how to sing,

But can he even hear me?

Can he hear how desperate I am?

With every song,

With every I love you,

A monster claws at my throat,

Screaming these lyrics,

These words that you taught me to put in my mouth,

These words in which are the sweet candy,

Leaving a bitter aftertaste in the same mouth you kissed

As my eyes well up with tears,

Remembering that you taught me how to sing.

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devilberries · 3 years

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Identity V Joseph Angst

tw: mentions of character death (Claude), lots of angst you have been warned

Also, there’s a lot of French but just go with it ;)

Synopsis: For weeks, Edgar has been painting Joseph’s brother Claude during matches in order to depress him and underhandedly earn wins for his team. The trauma of losing his brother slowly returns as he gets more matches with Painter, and when he confronts him, he’s at his worst.

——————————

“C’est toi,” the photographer said sharply.

Edgar turned his head and frowned.

“Are you still mad you lost that round? It’s been, what, two days?”

“En effet, it’s been two days,” the photographer commented as he walked towards where Edgar was sitting. “Even so,” the painter flinched when Joseph slammed his sword into the table, “you’ve been pulling the same trick on me every single time for weeks.”

Victor and Luca glanced at each other. Edgar, however, showed no sign of fear if he felt any.

He clicked his tongue, “Listen, photo man. I’m a painter. I paint if you haven’t noticed the paint brush.” He waved the tool into the photographer’s face.

“C'est des conneries!” Joseph cried. “That gives you no right to use my- my brother,” the man took in a shallow breath. He was infuriated, repulsed even. “How could you use him like that?”

His chest heaved up and down. He had been tormented by this painter since the very day the boy set foot into the manor.

“I have nightmares again because of you,” Joseph whispered. “I see him, I see Claude… ma moitié.”

Joseph looked away from the painter and stared at the wooden table, but no matter how hard he stared, he felt tears brimming around his eyes.

Victor walked besides Joseph and handed him a box of tissues. The photographer accepted gratefully as the postman patted him on the back.

“Listen, I’m sorry your brother died or whatever, but-

“TA GUEULE!”

Everyone silenced at Joseph’s outburst.

The man heaved up and down. He looked older than his usual self, more weary.

“That was a bit too far, Edgar…” Luca stated in a hushed tone.

The painter was quick to defend himself, sneering, “Why should I empathize with a hunter? It’s not like he’ll listen to our pleads when we’re in a match.”

“Je t'en supplie…” Joseph mumbled. “Please stop tormenting me. I will let you guys free in matches, just don’t bring up my brother again…”

Edgar frowned at the request, but he watched as Joseph fell onto his knees as Victor tried to support him. He observed the scene before him and felt his chest get heavier.

“This is complete nonsense,” he huffed and got up, leaving Joseph weeping on the floor.

***

Joseph retired for the day and maybe even the rest of the week. He remained in his room for days and wouldn’t let a single soul in. He had photos sprawled all around the floor, photos of Claude.

“Ma moitié…” he whispered to himself, hunched beside his bed. His fingers traced over the piles of photos.

He glanced at the cracked mirror before him. Though it was clearly broken, there were still fragments of himself that he could see, yet those very same fragments were also pieces of Claude.

His eyes flickered to the door when he heard someone knocking.

“Joseph?” Ah, it was Aesop. The photographer had taken a liking to the embalmer because he reminded him of his brother, yet their personalities were nothing alike. “You should really eat.”

He stayed quiet and hugged his knees.

“Let me try,” another voice appeared. Joseph could hear Aesop arguing with them. The bickering continued and continued and-

“Why must you argue in front of my room?”

Aesop and Edgar gawked at the sight of Joseph. He knew how disheveled he was, the fact that his blouse wasn’t buttons up properly, how his hair was all tangled and let down. His shirt wasn’t even tucked in right.

Before the embalmer could get a word out, Edgar held out a piece of paper. Joseph stared at him for a moment, cautious of what the boy had planned. Edgar jutted the paper at him, motioning him to take it.

When Joseph retrieved it, he looked at the paper and realized it was a painting, specifically a painting of Claude and him.

“What is- how- why are you giving me this?” The photographer snapped. The painter said nothing, but his face was conflicted. Maybe he thought the painting would resolve the problem, but that was not the case.

No, the loss of Claude would never be resolved. It was only a matter of keeping it locked away in his heart and moving on.

“I wanted to apologize,” he muttered.

Aesop scoffed, “Well, you’re not doing a great job of it, huh?”

Joseph closed his eyes and sighed, “Come into my room.”

The painter widened his eyes, surprised by the response. Aesop looked at Joseph with a raised eyebrow. Joseph gave a tired smile back and headed inside.

As Edgar walked in, he yelped as he was pulled back by the collar.

“If you make him more upset than he already is, don’t even think about being rescued in your matches,” he jeered.

The painted glared back and shoved him away. When he shut the door, he realized how dark it was in Joseph’s room. It would’ve been pitch black if it weren’t for the dim light peeking through the window blinds.

As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he took a step forward and felt something beneath his foot. Looking down, he spotted the endless piles of photos sprawled around the room.

“Wha…” he glanced at Joseph, who sat on the side of his bed drearily. Edgar softened his eyes and closed his mouth, deciding it was best not to say much. He looked around even more. He saw the broken mirrors. He noticed the slash marks on the walls.

“Perhaps you don’t understand what it’s like to lose your moitié,” Joseph chuckled bitterly. “It is dark and cold, and yet I keep seeing him everywhere I go, as if he isn’t dead. When I see me, I see Claude. That’s why I hate mirrors or anything that will show my reflection. It’s not as if I don’t want to see him though; I love him, but it reminds me that I am the one that is alive.

“And it makes me feel guilty. It- I…. I just feel so sorry to him that I had to be the one to live. Sometimes, I wish I were the one dead. He is my moitié; there is no way I can live without him.”

Edgar furrowed his eyebrows and deepened his frown. His chest tightened. He turned to Joseph and asked gently, “You keep saying ‘moitié.’ What does that mean? Brother? Twin?”

Joseph looked up at the painter with a smile and broke his heart when he said,

“My other half.”

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devilberries · 3 years

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“I love you too.”

——————-

Childe x fem reader HEAVY ANGST

TW character death

“Getting tired, Traveler?”

She scoffed at the ginger while gripping her arm.

“You’re not looking too well either, Tartaglia.”

He chuckled in return, wiping the blood dripping from his mouth and smearing it on his cheek. There was something alluring about that, about the crazed look in his eyes, even if they were so empty. There was something about that smirk, which would grow wider as the Traveler grew flustered by his teasing. There was something, just something about the thrill of being involved with the Eleventh Harbinger.

Lumine couldn’t get enough of it.

Of course, even in the middle of fighting to the death, they both continued to bicker as if time took a twist back to the usual Liyue days. Oh, how the two of them wished they could do so, yet no matter how powerful they were, the ability to change time was far out of their grasp.

They were past the point of making up and overcoming each other’s differences. They were enemies, loyal to completely opposite causes, and they would continue getting in each other’s way. It didn’t matter if they could’ve come up with a deal or a contract to sort out this mess in order to protect whatever they had left of a bond. Clearly, none of them were going to hold back.

That would just simply be insulting.

“You know,” the man knelt down, picking something. “If we can just ignore the fact that one of us is going to come out of this fight alive, being up here with you on this cliff full of glaze lilies as the stars glimmer above us…” He looks up, staring longingly at the dark sky, “It’s almost romantic, no?”

Lumine was used to his antics. He would always pull one of his many pick up lines and try to seduce her while they were in the middle of something important. She snorted when he walked up to her with the glistening blue flower in his hand. Although he laughed as well, his eyes remained firm on her.

She rested her hand on the handle of her sword and smiled, “Perhaps.”

“Now, now,” he laughed. “Can’t you at least entertain the idea?”

She watched as he came, and as the distanced closed between them, she started to take a few steps back, unsheathing her sword. Her lips twitched, and her smile faltered, but not his. No, his grin grew wider. He had the charisma of an untouchable god. His confidence outweighed hers, and it wouldn’t stop growing until he could eat her up whole and envelop her in complete, utter fear. He held his hand out and dropped the innocent flower, making sure to step on it with no hesitation.

“Wait, watch out!”

Lumine widened her eyes as she felt herself fall back.

“Childe!”

Though it was too late, she realized she had been too cautious of the ginger that she didn’t even notice she was right at the edge of the cliff. With nothing to hold on to, she was ready to fall down head first and plummet to her death.

What a shame, she thought. She wouldn’t die by the hands of her beloved Harbinger, but instead, die by her own foolish mistake.

Suddenly, she yelped as she was pulled with a harsh tug. Her legs grew weak as she fell into the arms of Tartaglia.

He held her tightly as he breathed heavily against her, his chest heaving up and down. Hiccups erupted from the girl as she bawled, tears streaming down her cheeks with no sign of stopping.

He whispered sweet nothings as his voice quivered. He caressed her head, almost trying to convince himself that she was still there with him. Her body shook against him, and it broke his heart.

“Girlie, you really scared me there,” he laughed, but it almost came out as a sob. Her hands clenched his shirt tightly, afraid that she would plummet to her death again if she let go. His mouth opened as he tried to find the words to say. Something, anything to comfort her, mostly himself, if he had to be completely honest.

“Hey, look at me.” Despite being so close together, she didn’t seem to hear him. Instead, she sobbed even harder, sputtering complete nonsense as she was struck with fear in his arms. He gently tilted her head up to face him. Her eyes met with his dark blue ones, and she stopped trembling. “You’re alive.” She’s alive. “You’re gonna be okay.” I’m gonna make sure she’s okay.

“And I love you. A lot. More than I wanted to actually.” He began to look at other places, anywhere, at the trees, the bushes, the glaze lilies, anywhere but her. “I know. I know. I…” Words, Tartaglia. Words. “We… agreed that it would’ve been okay to die by each other’s hands. I said I would be okay with it. But I-I… I really don’t think I can bear losing you after this-

“Childe.” He froze when Lumine put her hand up to his cheek, gently wiping a tear away. He didn’t even realize he was crying. “I— Childe!”

It was quick. Way too quick. Nobody could’ve expected this. No, they should’ve been more careful. They should’ve gotten far away from the edge of the cliff the moment Lumine was saved, but who would’ve guessed the ground below them would collapse?

Who would’ve thought that they would end up like this?

And yet, even as their shrieks and screams filled the silent night, the stars glistened, remaining unchanged.

It was truly unfair, really. How time never seemed to stop. No, time always kept going for Lumine, even when she lost her brother, even when she was having such a hard time trying to find him, even when Childe and her grew apart, and especially now, as she was lying on the ground, her head bleeding after colliding into a large stone.

She laid on her side with no energy to move. She could barely move a finger, and her vision was hazy. But she didn’t miss the ginger head laying beside her. She didn’t miss the blood pooling around him.

She didn’t miss the large branch impaling him through his chest.

“Ch-Ch…” her mouth quivered as she tried to say the name of the man she adored.

It was unfair how her body was giving up on her, but she wouldn’t allow it. Not yet.

“Childe…”

The man turned his head slowly, but he didn’t fail to meet with her eyes. Tears welled up in her eyes when she realized how dead his were. Even more dead than before. There was no life, no love, none of the mischievous liveliness he had in him just a moment ago.

She quietly sobbed, but he smiled.

It was unfair that they were dying when she hadn’t even shown him her affection yet.

“Childe,” she spoke once more, mustering up whatever energy she had left. He nodded shortly, wincing from the pain.

“I… love you.”

He smiled again and mouthed the three words back to her before closing his eyes.

It was unfair that after all the “I love you”’s Childe had said to her, whether they were to tease her or not, it was unfair that she would only get to say one “I love you” back to him.

#genshin x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin lumine #genshin angst #angst #genshin impact #childe #childe x you #childe x reader #childe angst #childe x fem!reader #tartagalia x reader #genshin tartagalia #tartagalia genshin impact

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devilberries · 3 years

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~Tears of Themis~

Marius royalty au

Part ii coming out soon with Marius x femMC

Pressure.

Marius Von Hagen knew pressure very well. In fact, he was acquainted with pressure since he was born. Pressure had been holding his hand since he learned how to walk, and it’s always stuck by his side.

Pressure weighed on his back when he became prince. Pressure weighed on his back when he sat with the neighboring royal children. Pressure weighed on his back when his brother ran away. Pressure weighed on his back when he became the crown prince. Pressure weighed on his back when his parents both grew old and ill.

Pressure weighed on his back when he became king.

And here he sat on the throne. It felt uncomfortable, like he didn’t belong there. The elbow rests of the golden chair were cold, unwelcoming. The seat itself was big. He felt like a small child, sitting there.

It reminded him that he was only king in name. At least, that was what people kept saying. He almost believed them. He really should. After all, how could he rule a kingdom he was never meant to rule?

Was this why his brother left? Were the responsibilities too much? Was this why he ran away, leaving all the heavy burdens behind for his pitiful younger brother?

Marius slumped in his seat defeatedly. It wasn’t like he could ask his parents for help when they were both ill in their beds.

But now that there was a change in power, advisors, military commanders, and neighboring kingdoms were watching for a chance to swoop in and eat up Marius. They were waiting for him to slip and fall, using it to their advantage. They would try and try to manipulate Marius, the ignorant younger prince who only knew how to draw.

He heard the whispers in the long halls. He knew of the names they conjured up for him. He could feel the contempt through their fake smiles.

“Your Royal Majesty,” one of the advisors coughed. Marius snapped out of his daze and looked at him. The advisor furrowed his eyebrow and stated, “As the king of this nation, it would be wise not to mindlessly daydream in the middle of a meeting.”

Marius could hear another counselor scoff under his breath, “King? He’s no king. Just a foolish child wearing a crown.”

He raised eyes at the two men calmly.

“Tell me, old man, who is my father?”

The counselor stared back at him with caution as he answered, “His Royal Majesty King Austin von Hagen.”

Marius smirked when he heard his voice quiver. “Alright, and what is my brother’s title?”

Whispers rush between the men along the long table. It was an unspoken rule not to speak of the original crown prince. They could feel the tension suffocate them.

“H-His Royal Highness… Prince G-Giann von Hagen.”

“Good!” Marius smiled, praising the old man, who sat there, sweating buckets of water. “Now,” he stared straight into his eyes, “what is my title?”

“Y-Your Royal Majesty… King Marius von Hagen II.”

“Ah, ah, ah,” Marius waved his finger at the counselor. “That’s not what you said a few seconds ago. Tell me, oh, wise counselor.” He walked behind the old man, towering above him. He placed his hands on his shoulders and asked, “What did you call me?”

The silence was loud. Everyone could only look down, ignoring the counselor. Marius could feel the man shake beneath his touch.

He knew this wasn’t the life he was meant for. He knew that he was better off painting somewhere far away from the throne. Marius knew he was an incompetent king.

But a king nonetheless.

When the man said nothing, Marius whispered, just loud enough for everyone to hear, “That’s treason, you know? What should we do with you, hmm? We could,” he traced his finger on the shaking counselor’s neck, “slit your throat. Hang you. Maybe both. Or wait,” he snaked his arm around the man’s shoulder and harshly grabbed the man’s cheeks with one hand.

“We could cut that tongue of yours out.”

As if that triggered something in him, the man began to sputter out words, begging for mercy. He’d be on his knees if he could, but he didn’t dare shove Marius away. The young king cringed when he felt the man’s snot and tears drip down on his hand. Hastily, he pulled away and called for the guards.

As they forced the counselor away, he screamed and cried, but they all fell on deaf ears. Marius turned to the others who sat there with pale faces.

“I think it’d be best to end the meeting here today. Good day, everyone.” He turned to leave, and everyone let out a sigh of relief, until he turned around. They all flinched and attempted to compose themselves. “Ah, by the way,” he eyed each one of them carefully. “I wasn’t joking when I said that was treason. If I hear a single one of you utter a word about my father, brother, or me, I will cut your tongues out, and let it be known that your families won’t be spared.”

He swiftly exited the room and headed to his parents room.

Pressure trailed behind him, so he walked faster. It was a hopeless attempt, as it caught up to him in no time. He paused his movement and clutched his chest, taking in heavy breaths. The shame and embarrassment clouds his vision, while fear blocked his hearing. He was simply alone, facing his fellow friend pressure once more.

He could tell it was mocking him. He could hear its laughs as it pointed at him, calling his crown unbefitting of him, a faux king. He could feel the judgement of its eyes as it stared at him, his glimmering jewels and badges and oversized cape.

Even with all the riches and gold covering him, he felt so naked.

When he felt its hand on its shoulder, he turned and yelled at it, hoping the nightmare would end.

“Get away from me!”

There he was, Vyn, his Royal Tutor, hand in the air as it was shoved away by Marius, and wearing a surprised expression on his face.

He quickly erased whatever trace of shock he had on his face and inquired the boy, “Should we skip todays lessons, Your Royal Majesty?”

Marius blinked back at him, not comprehending what he had just said.

What just happened? Did he shove Vyn?

Vyn saw his visible panic and gently placed his hand on his shoulder. The poor boy looked at him with fear.

“Your Royal Majesty-“

“Don’t call me that,” he whispered with closed eyes. “That’s not me. I’m not…”

“Oh, but you are,” Vyn said. “Let’s talk somewhere more private, shall we?”

No words came out of Marius, so the Tutor pulled the depressed king along with him into a private guest bedroom. He softly pushed Marius to sit on the bed, while he himself sat on the chair, watching the boy.

“How do you feel?”

Marius stared at the ground emptily. “Can I answer you honestly, Vyn?”

“Of course. You can tell me anything… Marius,” he added that at the end carefully. The boy let out a relieved sigh once he heard Vyn drop the honorifics.

“You really don’t have to call me all those things in public either, Vyn.”

He smiled, “That would be rude and almost treasonous. Didn’t I teach you that?”

“Argh,” Marius bent over, covering his face. “Don’t even mention the word treason near me again.”

“Why? What’s wrong with that?”

Marius looked up, and Vyn chuckled at his distressed expression. “I may have gotten mad at someone for talking shit about me, so I sent him to the chambers and threatened to cut his tongue off…”

Vyn raised an eyebrow, “Was it someone from the Council?”

“Yeah, it was,” Marius sighed.

“Well, it was very irrational to say, at the least, but at least you took the initiative to use your power. That’s the first step of being a ruler.”

“But I don’t want to be a ruler, Vyn. You know that. This,” he got up and spread his arms out, pointing to himself, “none of this stuff feels right. Being King doesn’t feel right. I don’t feel right. Everything is just so…” He trailed off, rubbing his eyes hard to stop the tears.

Vyn sat there patiently. He watched as the boy just a bit younger than him fall apart. He knew it would happen one day. No, in fact, he hoped it would happen. Perhaps this was Marius’s way to free himself from this mess of a kingdom he was born it.

The Tutor was smart. He was intelligent enough to be a military strategist, maybe even be King, but he was unlucky. He was born with commoner blood, yet maybe he was grateful to have been a mere peasant, a mere servant to serve a spoiled prince because he realized being born with royal blood didn’t mean you were lucky; you were just crushed even more by the endless expectations of thousands of people who entrust their lives to you.

He knew what Marius was going to

Everything was just so suffocating.

———————————

It took a while for Marius to stop crying. Vyn chuckled to himself thinking about it. How old was he? Twenty-one, right? Twenty-one and still weeping like he was five.

“Marius.” The boy who was sitting down on the bed, hugging a soft white pillow, looked up with puffy eyes. They decided it was best to stay until his eyes were a bit better in case word spreads that the King is a big baby. “If the pressure makes you too anxious, how about visiting the Themis Temple?”

“Temple? But I’m not religious,” Marius sniffed.

“I know that, but it might calm you a bit. Visiting the temple may bring peace and tranquil for your mind. Plus, I heard the priests and priestesses there are very kind and welcoming to all, despite social and economical differences.”

The boy raised his eyebrow when he heard the words “welcoming to all, despite social and economical differences.”

Was there really such a place that would overlook such things?

“Plus, I hear that they have this intriguing… we’ll call it ‘tradition.’”

“What do you mean by that?” Marius questioned.

“Well, you see, they believe that all the Head Priestesses that are born inherit Themis’s blood. I hear the Head Priestess as of now has a daughter who is coming of age to become the next Head Priestess, so they’re having this event, almost like a ritual to perform on the girl.”

Marius furrowed his eyebrows. “Ritual?”

Vyn nodded, “Yes, a ritual. I’ve only heard rumors, since the last one was forty years ago, but, apparently, the girl gets hot water poured all over her. It’s suppose to symbolize inheriting the burdens of the last Head Priestess and to make her feel the injustice of this world weigh down on her.”

Marius frowned. That sounded more like torture. He felt pity for the girl. She seemed similar to Marius, born with responsibility and pressure, with a role she never asked for.

“How about you go with me right now? We can use our study time to see whether or not you’ll like it. Plus, I believe it’s an opportunity of a lifetime.”

“But won’t people recognize me?” He inquired.

“The question you should be asking is not that, but if you ‘want’ people to recognize you.”

“Of course, I wouldn’t want people to know,” he grumbled.

“Then we shall dress as normal aristocrats. Come now, I have plenty of clothes that will suit you. You’ll have to make due with a commoner’s clothes, Your-“

“Don’t even think about addressing me like that,” he sneers. “And I don’t mind about wearing commoner stuff. I don’t care for this social hierarchy at all.”

Vyn whistles, “How cute, coming from a person of privilege.”

“You know that’s not what I mean!”

“Right, right, of course. I’ll just have to trust your word then. Now, shall we get dressed?”

The two exit the guest bedroom and head to Vyn’s, which was a couple doors down the hall. They walked side by side. Though the servants and maids whispered among themselves, Marius was occupied with his thoughts.

He couldn’t get his mind off of the girl. Perhaps it was infatuation, or genuine curiosity. He created an illusion in his mind.

In his fantasies, he would speak with the girl. He would ask if she felt proud to be part of this bloodline of Goddess’s, or if she felt as if such a position did not suit someone like her. In his mind, she would hesitantly tell him her true thoughts, that she didn’t want to burn under the wrath of the burning water. He would say he felt the same, that he had always been crushed by the constant expectations of the people. He would hold her hand and promise that he would save her, that the two of them could run away together, and she would agree. And together they would-

“The advisors weren’t wrong about you and your constant daydreaming,” Vyn chuckled as he flicked his forehead. Marius flinched, groaning out loud as he slapped his hand above his eyes. The Tutor turned the knob and held the door open. “Hurry now; we wouldn’t want to miss the performance, would we?”

Marius huffed and stepped in, shoving the Tutor along his way. Inside, Artem sat at Vyn’s desk, reading a few documents. His shirt was slightly unbuttoned, and his face wore a tired expression with the visible frown and disheveled hair.

It would be best not to piss off the Royal Justice.

“Artem,” Vyn called out. The grumpy man turned away from his papers and nodded at Vyn. When he noticed Marius, he heaved himself up to properly greet his king, but Marius quickly stopped him.

“Hey, sit down. I don’t need to hear any more honorifics than I should, and I would really hate hearing them from you.”

Artem sighed as he sat back down, pinching his nose bridge. “Sorry, I’m just completely exhausted right now. Work has been so swamped lately.”

Marius softened his eyes. “Is there anyway I can help you?”

The Royal Justice shook his head, “No. If you assisted me, word would spread that I am incompetent. There’s already enough rumors spreading around the castle.”

He had already known how brutally honest Artem was. Still, he could never get used to it. It ticked him off how Artem brushed him off like that; it felt insulting.

Before Marius could say any retort, Vyn placed a hand on his shoulder. “Artem, how about we all take a break?”

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