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sighingstarbeam · 3 years

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Spies and Gods Chapter 13

Word Count: 3,988

A/N: I am SO sorry for the late update! I have a million excuses but the top two are work and writer's block. Needless to say I am back and hopefully I can crank out more chapters of this as well as a few chapters of new works. School is getting back in session soon but this will quench y'alls thirst for a little bit. Also, I edited some parts in a few chapters since I wasn't totally satisfied with them after rereading a few. I don't remember what I changed, but it shouldn't be anything major except for the name Nick changing to Nate. Stay safe and happy readings!

Chapter 12 | Chapter 14

He stood in front of you, arm outstretched as flames engulfed his entire being. His black eyes reflected the flames as they bore into your soul. You wanted to run from the boy on fire, yet your legs refused to work in your favor. The heat was unbearable as he inched closer, and closer, and closer. With a shaky hand his grip was near your throat until a familiar voice whispered your name in your ear, causing the boy in flames to recede back into the darkness.

You woke up from your deep, yet stressful sleep. Usually you wouldn’t get hangovers, but considering what happened the night before your body was heavy from exhaustion. Your head didn’t hurt as much as you thought it would, but there was a consistent, dull throb that surfaced every so often. The dream you had crept back into your mind, especially the voice that called your name. Even though it was so clear, you couldn’t place whose it was. The boy in flames was all too familiar. He was there almost every night. A sharp knock at the door distracted you from your thoughts.

You checked your phone to see the time; eight in the morning on the dot. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes you shuffled out of bed. Your head pounded harder when you got to your feet, then it settled down after a moment getting yourself oriented. There was a second knock, faster this time, signaling you to hurry up. You opened the door allowing the light from the hallway to flow in your room, causing you to squint your eyes to adjust from the sudden brightness. Even though your eyes felt like they were being stabbed by light, you could still see the tall figure standing in the doorway.

“Loki, what are you doing here? It’s too early.” You asked, rubbing your eye hoping it would help adjust to the light faster.

“Good morning to you as well.” He replied, “You’re looking awfully unprepared for today. First impressions are everything on your first day. You’re lucky I even let you sleep in.” Loki visibly eyed you up and down. Your hair was a mess, there was leftover makeup smudged on your face, and your pajamas were days overdue for a wash.

This time when you squinted it was in confusion, “First day for what?” After you spoke you remembered the agreement you made with Loki the night before. “I completely forgot. Can you give me, like, thirty minutes so I can shower and eat?”

Loki tapped his chin, pondering your question, “I’ll allow it. However, if I have to wait for you again, I may have to resort to a suitable punishment.”

You rolled your eyes, “Cool, whatever. Just let me shower so I don’t smell like overpriced liquor.” You shut the door on Loki before he had a chance to say anything else. His foot halted the door before it could close entirely. Loki barged through, closing the door behind him so it was just the two of you in your room.

“Allow me to clarify the terms of our bargain,” Loki stated, “even though I changed our agreement, the fact stays that I am still the one who is in a higher position no matter which deal you chose. I would highly advise you to be a little more respectful if you don’t want your dear Avenger friends to know that you and I were outside of these walls.”

You tilted your head in a mix of confusion and annoyance, “Are you blackmailing me?” You scoffed, “You realize that if you tattle on me you’re tattling on yourself.”

“I’m highly aware. However, I’m already dealing with my punishment.”” Loki paced around the room, eyeing your belongings like it was his own personal museum, granted you didn’t have much on display. Dirty clothes were here and there, thankfully nothing embarrassing other than some shirts and a pair of pants. The only thing worth looking at was a framed photo of you, Maya, and Lilly on your dresser. Loki picked up the frame, inspecting the photo, “They refuse to put me in anyone else’s care other than their own for safety measures, so they can’t send me somewhere else. You on the other hand are disposable.”

You snatched the picture from his hand as if he was contaminating it somehow, “I’m not disposable,” you mocked his accent, “I have value here, they even said I could be part of the team. True I’m still gaining some trust, but...” Loki’s words were starting to make sense to you. They see Loki as a bigger threat than you, and with many of the members having personal experiences with him of course the Avengers refuse to let anyone else have custody. You on the other hand showed up out of the blue with a sob story and no trust to be earned. If they had to choose between the lesser of two evils, ironically you would be first on the list to kick out. Even if they don’t force you to leave, the respect you did manage to earn would be tossed out and you would have to start from square one. Once again, Loki was backing you into a corner of choices with only one viable answer.

Loki noticed you were putting the pieces together in your head, “Are we in agreement?”

You shrugged in exasperation, “Yes, fine we’re in agreement. Just don’t rat us out.” You put the photo back in it’s spot while you were on your way to the bathroom, stopping at the door, “Can you wait a minute so I can shower now?”

“Yes, you may.” Loki said, gesturing his arm out as if verbal permission wasn’t enough.

Upon entering the bathroom with your makeup still scattered around the counter from the night before, you slammed the door to make sure Loki got the hint that you weren’t completely satisfied with your deal.

You turned the handles in the shower, filling the room with the sound of flowing water and hot steam. Still sore from the night prior, you slowly undressed down to your bare skin. Looking in the mirror, you observed the bruises Nate left when he was dragging you into his car. Shame, embarrassment, regret, so many emotions filled you to the point your stomach began to churn. How could you be so stupid? You were a trained spy taught to spot any sign of danger to protect yourself. The moment a guy you thought you had a chance with came into your life, you let your guard down for one second, leading to everything going to shit. The reason you were put into that position in the first place was because you let your pride get to you after your fight with Loki. If you would have sucked it up and gone back to the party you could have at least pretended to enjoy the rest of the night. You wanted to blame Loki so bad. Blame him for putting you into that position. Yet deep down you know no one was truly at fault. Loki even saved you the second he knew something was wrong. The only thing you could do now was forget the whole ordeal happened.

You stepped into the hot shower, the soreness in your body melting away. You promised yourself to quit thinking about the attack or anything to do with it, but your mind kept slipping to the thought of Loki saving you. You know he carried you to the car, and from what you pieced together you know he messed Nate up pretty good. Perhaps there is some kindness in that god’s heart. Yet again, you were his ride home, and if you ended up missing on his accord you had a feeling that the team wouldn’t like that at all, so he was obliged to rescue you.

It was all over and done with, so there is no reason for you to dwell on it any longer.

You stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around yourself. You proceeded to brush your teeth and prepare for the “highly” anticipated day ahead of you. Opening the door, you didn’t expect Loki to still be in your room, sitting on your bed.

“Loki! What are you still doing here?” Making sure your towel was on securely, you hid halfway behind the bathroom door, “When I said to wait while I get ready I didn’t mean for you to wait here.”

“It wasn’t my intention on being here when you were finished,” Loki said, making eye contact with you but not daring to look anywhere else, “but your father is waiting for you outside.”

Your eyes widened, “What does he want?”

“I’m not sure, but I told him you were changing to buy you some time.”

If you could, your eyes widened even more, “You talked to him? Did it even occur to you what Tony would think as to why you’re in my room this early in the morning?”

“Don’t be obscure, I answered as you.” He turned his head to the door, “I suggest you hurry though, it’s been a little over five minutes since I, I mean you, spoke to him.”

You let out an annoyed groan. Opening the bathroom door fully, you stepped forward and grabbed Loki by the arm, forcing him to stand and walk with you. “Hide. If he sees you- me… us, we’re dead.” With that you shoved him in your bathroom and shut the door. Quickly you found a pair of pants and shirt to throw on, even if they were from the dirty pile of clothes.

“Sorry about that, when did you get back-” You opened your door not to be greeted by Tony, but one of his Iron Man suits. “...Why are you suited up?”

“I’m not,” the suit said as the helmet opened, revealing no one inside, “I’m still in Norway.” His suit took a few steps into your room. When he entered you closed the door behind you leaving a small gap in between the door and the frame. “We don’t have the nitty gritty details in stone but we have the green light to relocate the Asgardians. Your idea is getting somewhere, kid.”

“Really?” you beamed, “That’s great news, what’s the next step?”

“Thor is mapping out an old town named Tønsberg. It’s practically abandoned and has plenty of houses and stuff for them to get started. A lot of the buildings are worn down and need updates, but in a few months we should have everything set up for a new society.”

You were lost for words, but in the best of ways. An idea of yours was going to impact an entire civilization, to give them a second chance on an alien world. In some ways, you could compare yourself to the Asgardians. Both you and them had to watch the world around go to ruins, only to arrive somewhere new in hopes of sanctuary, or at least a stepping stone to carry on with life. Funny enough, with your situation Loki directly destroyed New York to rule it, but indirectly destroyed Asgard to save the people. Not that you were going to thank him for nearly enslaving the planet, but it was an odd comparison.

“When can the people of Asgard move to Tønsberg?” You ask, “Or are they going to call it something new since they’re calling dibs. Asgard two-point-oh?”

You could hear a static chuckle from his end, “Something like that. They’re going to send groups at a time to help with the renovations, then we can send families and such.” A moment of silence filled the room, as you thought that’d be the end of your conversation, until Tony spoke up again, “So about lunch plans-”

“We don’t have to plan it now,” you interrupt, “I understand that you and Thor have a lot of planning to do, we can talk about it when you’re really here.”

Tony nodded, “Alright then, I’ll just go break the news to your gothic neighbor and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Ha, your gothic neighbor. Oh fu- “Or! Before you talk to him, if you do have the time, we can talk about ideas on where to go.” You tried to nonchalantly change the subject. Two things could go down if Tony found that Loki wasn’t in his room; number one, Loki stayed hidden in the bathroom and you get blamed for losing him on your watch, which you technically didn’t. Number two, Loki reveals he was in the bathroom the whole time, leading Tony to ask why the hell he was in there when you said you were getting dressed, leading to a bigger branch of possibilities that could all explode in your face. Either option you despised. “I’ve been living in New York for a few months, but I’ve only been to so many places that fit with my budget. I’d like to explore and try new things.”

Tony tilted his head, you thought he was calling your bluff until he shrugged, “There’s a ton of local places that are pretty good, but if you want to be adventurous there’s a seafood place on 51st…” As Tony went on about restaurants, you prayed to whoever Loki got the hint to get back to his room or you’re both in deep shit. And as if on cue, someone listened. You saw the door creep open just a couple of inches, and on the ground a small, green and black snake slithered behind Tony’s feet, out of your barely opened door, and out of sight. You tried to keep your composure and eyes focused on the suit until you heard the hardly noticeable sound of Loki’s door opening then closing. You finally relaxed the tension in your shoulders knowing that you were home free. “Any of those sound good to you?”

You snap back to the conversation between Tony and yourself, “Uh, yeah those sound good. Any of those Italian?”

“I mentioned a couple, but I can set us up with something nice.” Tony said as he headed towards the door, “I’ll catch you around, kid.” With that he closed the door behind him to tell Loki the news, unbeknownst to Tony he already did.

You let out a sigh of relief as you plopped yourself onto your bed. You desperately wanted to crawl back under the covers and sleep, but you knew you’d have to deal with the wrath of Loki again, which was quite annoying the first time. Forcing yourself up, you decided to face the day, even if it meant spending time with a stupid face.

---

Once again you found yourself in the sparring arena where you fought Bucky. This time you were facing an annoying god from another world that happens to have leverage over you, at least for the time being. You kept thinking to yourself it would only be two weeks that you would have to endure this stupid deal you stupidly made that you never thought through since you were being so stupid. If you could endure years of torturous training with Hydra, you could last a couple weeks with the trickster god.

For now you have to try to grin and bear it. Maybe once this was all over you could try to gain the upper hand in your complicated partnership, if you wanted to call it that.

“Are you familiar with Asgardian style combat?” Loki asked, adjusting the gauntlets on his wrists. You shook your head ‘no’, “Of course not.” He said under his breath, “Warriors from Asgard are taught to be resourceful in their surroundings as well as use their talents to their advantage. One would normally prefer a weapon that best suits an ability they excel in. For example, someone who uses brute strength would wield something to channel that energy, like my brother and his hammer. Or someone who has a keen eye would use something with precision such as a bow and arrow, like your friend Barton.”

You stretched your arms as you listened to Loki rambling about Asgardian fighting. The more he spoke the more you realized how he had some passion behind his teaching. The way he described the history and methods of Asgardian fighting was almost like he was retelling tales that he either lived through or were told as a child. You noticed a glint behind those green eyes of his.

“What do you use?” You interrupt Loki mid-rant.

Loki raised an eyebrow, “I’m sorry?”

“If Thor has a hammer and Clint has a bow, what’s your weapon that suits you?”

Loki sighed, disappointed that you broke him off from his history lesson, “Personally I use-” He stopped mid sentence, “On second thought, how about I show you and you can come to your conclusion.” Loki conjured a dagger in each hand, without warning he lunged for the attack.

By startled instinct, you countered Loki’s movements with every stab and slice he threw at you. You were all too familiar with daggers and knives. A knife was an accessible weapon that could be used up close or at a distance with proper aim. Hydra made sure that every child could work up close and personal or throw with the aim of a marksman in order to finish the job. You couldn’t help but be reminded of the first butterfly knife you were given to practice with. The same knife you were given a week after being released from solitary confinement when you were forced to murder your best friend. Specially given to you by Kilcher himself, now forever buried under the rubble of a building. More should have been lost and forgotten in the debris. Your pain, memories, nightmares that you have every night of the torments you had to endure and bestow to others. Engulfed under concrete with Kilcher and the other Hydra men who well deserved their deaths.

Now wasn’t the best of times to brood. You snapped back to reality when you miscalculated an incoming attack, giving Loki advantage to catch you off guard. You knew he was a god, but you didn’t anticipate how strong he was. Fortunately for you, you had already disarmed Loki of both daggers.

“I’m impressed,” he said, pinning you down, “I was told that you already possessed some skill in hand to hand combat. No wonder you chose a fight with the Captain’s lackey.”

That’s right, you remembered he mentioned at the club that somebody told him about your predicament. Who told him and how much they told, you had no idea, but you didn’t really appreciate someone going around gossiping about you, particularly to the guy kicking your ass.

“Who?-” You grunted, struggling under his weight, “Who’s been telling you all of this? There’s no way anyone from the team explicitly told you my life story.”

“You’re right, no one told me directly,” he replied, “however, people like to talk when they think no one else is around to the people they trust most. If one were to look like their trusted person, you can get them to tell you anything. And you might have slipped some information to me here and there.” Confused, you didn’t know what he was implying. Then you remembered he was a shapeshifter. He was disguising himself as the other members to talk to them. Whether it was to gain intel or to ease his loneliness you weren’t positive, either option was sad. For all you knew, instead of talking to Natasha or Thor you were really talking to Loki. You hoped to whoever that you didn’t say anything embarrassing to possibly/possibly not Loki.

Throwing your hips to the side, you managed to slide your leg over his waist, allowing you to get out from under him. You were at the advantage now; blocking his attacks, reacting to his movements, you refused to let Loki beat you. Just like we used to spar, remember? His voice shot through your mind. Marcus, the boy who brought light to a blackened prison. The boy who taught you how to make good moments count.

The boy whose death was brought by your hands.

Memories flashed before your eyes. The two of you practicing in the courtyard the new moves that were taught. You don’t know why but in this moment with Loki you felt a wave of nostalgia. Seeing your guard go down, Loki took the opportunity to not hold back. You could barely keep up with the attacks as you pushed your intrusive thoughts away.

Before making your next move, a voice from the intercom startled you, “What are you two doing?” The voice boomed.

Startled by the sudden noise, you missed an attack that sent you tumbling to the ground. You regained your composure before looking up to see Steve, and he looked pissed. “Anyone care to explain what the hell I just witnessed?” Steve asked, his usual go-lucky demeanor long gone.

Loki stepped back from you, showing off his charismatic smile to woo the Captain, “If I may-”

“I don’t want to hear a word from you.” Steve snapped, “I want to hear from her.”

All eyes on you, time seemed to slow down and speed up as you tried to think of a valid excuse. “It was my idea,” you began, “I was feeling rusty with fighting and everyone was busy with missions and stuff, so Loki is my voluntary human punching bag.”

Loki looked offended, “I’m not a human nor a punching bag, but yes she requested my assistance in sparring and as I clearly have nothing else to do I said yes.”

Steve rubbed his chin in thought. He trusted you way more than Loki, but he couldn’t help but feel like Loki was up to something. “Alright. I don’t have a say in this since it’s not my call, but I don’t want to see this happen again until you get Tony’s permission.”

You rolled your eyes and sighed, “Fine, I’ll ask him.” Steve nodded, then glared at Loki before leaving the gallery.

“You’re distracted.” said Loki, offering his hand to help you up.

“Of course I am,” you pointed up towards the gallery, “I totally would have had you if he didn’t interrupt.” You ignored his gesture and stood up on your own. Your body was already aching, you were sure there would be bruises by tomorrow.

“That’s not what I’m talking about. There is something else intruding your thoughts. Allowing your memories to surface during combat can be beneficial, but also a distraction. You need to only think of your training and what drives you to fight.” Loki’s words were sincere. This was one of the few times his tone felt mocking or sarcastic. “If there are memories or something that you need to get off your chest, you need to find peace with it even if it’s for a few minutes.”

“What are you, my shrink?” You dusted yourself off of dirt from the mats, “Listen, I appreciate the lectures and words or wisdom, but I need to deal with my personal problems on my own. It’s nothing against you, honest. It’s just a thing I need to do. And quit shapeshifting into my friends. If you want to talk to someone you can always ask.”

Loki nodded, “I will respect that.” You were surprised with how mature he was handling this. It was almost sweet. “Now that I’ve seen exactly how much you can handle, I can determine our future sessions from this point forward.” he said as you both exited the arena.

“Right, if we even have future sessions. I need to talk to Tony and get his blessing.”

“I’m sure he will allow you to use me as a ‘human punching bag’.” He smiled, and you couldn’t help but smile back.

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sighingstarbeam · 4 years

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Spies and Gods Chapter 12

Summary: Reader holds up her end of the deal with Loki. The only question is will either of them survive?

Word Count: 3,721

A/N: Here's my final chapter that I cranked out before going back to school a few days from now. Not sure how busy I'll be due to everything going on in the world right now, but I can assure you guys that I don't intentionally plan on abandoning this project. With that being said, depending on how much free time I have I'll either take a short hiatus or write bit by bit. Stay safe and healthy everyone.

Chapter 11 | Chapter 13

You woke up to the cool touch of leather. Everything was quiet and still, yet your head was pounding and your stomach was doing flips. Getting your sight oriented, you realized you were in the driver’s seat of the car you took, still parked in the same spot from before. You rubbed your eyes, wincing from a pain from your wrists. They were bruised in the shape of fingers. Those definitely weren’t there before.

To your right you saw a figure, elbow resting on the edge of the window, hand supporting his head as his eyes were closed. The figure seemed peaceful, vulnerable. Your eyes adjusted to see that the figure was Loki. His tie was loosened while the first two buttons on his shirt were undone, exposing his bare chest slightly. It was weird seeing him so calm. You almost didn’t want to disturb him, but you were beyond confused.

“Loki?” You nudged his arm, his eyes fluttering open.

“How do you feel?” He asked, his posture straightening.

“I feel like shit, but I’m okay.” You rubbed your temples in an attempt to sooth the pulsing, “What happened? How did we get here?”

Loki adjusted his position to face you, “What was the last thing you remember?”

You took a moment to retrace your memory, “I remember we were with my friends, and I got mad at you for something and went to the bar. There was this guy…” You tensed when you began to remember, “He said his name was Nate- no, Nick. It was Nick. We talked and went to go dance… and that’s it.” You buried your face in your palms, your nails digging into your skin. “I’m such an idiot! I let my guard down for one second and this happens…” You quickly looked down at yourself to find that your clothes were still intact. No rips or tears, or even any signs of it being removed. “Oh God, please tell me he didn’t-”

“He didn’t have a chance to do anything.” Loki interrupted your thought, “He is far from here, and if he ever shows his face here he wouldn’t even have a chance to breathe for mercy.”

Loki sneered his last words. You couldn’t think of anything to say or do but to just sit there, absorbing what happened. You finally broke the silence, “Did you carry me all the way up here?”

“What?”

“We’re on the third floor and the elevator is busted. Unless you can fly, you must’ve carried me.”

Loki chuckled, “We should be returning soon if we don’t wish to get caught.”

Your eyes widen, “How long was I out?”

“A few hours.” You looked at your phone to see it was past two in the morning.

“Dammit, why didn’t you drive us?”

Loki shrugged, “I haven’t a clue how to get back, let alone know the address to enter for directions.”

You combed your fingers through your hair, “Okay, this is fine. Hopefully everybody’s sleeping when we get back.” You started the car and left the parking garage. The next few minutes you wanted to ask Loki so many questions about what happened, but you were thankful that you were out of it and going home. “Loki?”

He turned his gaze from the window to you, “Yes?”

“Thank you.”

You saw him smile weakly before returning to the window. “You’re welcome.”

---

You have been talking to the strange man for over ten minutes. You promised (more so threatened) Loki that after one drink you would be returning back to headquarters. As much as he loved swooning the group of ladies off of their feet, Loki began growing weary of the night, patiently waiting for you to be done with your drink and done with this depraved looking individual.

Looking back, Loki surprised himself by genuinely enjoying his time out up until your argument, which to him was a minor complication, but nonetheless everything else went well. As much as he was restless to get away from the Avengers and his brother, Loki still had to weigh his options when the opportunity to spend the night out presented itself, even if it was with the daughter of Tony Stark and her Midgardian friends. Upon first arriving at the club he thought he would have the same feelings for humans as he did years ago; disgusting, weak, lesser than him, mere animals compared to his intellect. Instead he didn’t find them as disgusting.

Until Loki saw the man lead you to the dance floor.

All right, no big deal. Loki figured it would just be another ten minutes or so. He tried to ignore you, yet he still couldn’t help to take a glimpse in your direction. When his eyes met yours, he quickly averted them and focused back to the girls. Maya and Lilly returned from the restrooms, more drinks in hand.

“Where’d Y/N go?” asked Lilly, scooching herself back into the booth.

“Out there with some boor.” Loki guided towards the wave of people dancing.

Maya squinted at the crowd trying to spot you, “I don’t see her.”

Without hesitation Loki shot up. Standing he scanned the dancers, not seeing you or the man among them. Something was definitely wrong. Loki couldn’t shake the feeling that you were in danger. Face revealing a hint of distress, Loki took long strides out of his seat towards where he last saw you. Clusters of people continuously blocked his path, his heart began to pound faster than usual with each one he bumped into.

Once he made it where you were, Loki was met with Lilly and Maya trailing not too far behind. “What’s going on?” Lilly asked in concern.

Barely looking at the girls as his only interest was finding you, Loki replied, “I’m afraid Y/N was taken. We need to find her immediately.”

Maya grabbed Loki’s shoulder, pointing to a backdoor, “There! I just saw her go through that door.”

Loki, Lilly, and Maya rushed through the mob as quickly as they could. Through pushes, elbowing, and shoving, they finally managed to get to the backdoor.

On the other side you were being escorted to a black truck with four doors and tinted windows. Nick opened the door behind the driver’s side, carefully guiding you in. You tried to hit him before passing out with the exception of mumbled words leaving your lips. With the little strength you had you managed to scratch his face, leaving a cut that wasn’t deep enough to bleed but at least left some pain.

Nick winced from your attack, “You bitch! Hold still and this’ll be easier.” He gripped your wrists as tight as he could, forcing you all the way over the seats. Now you were completely unconscious, motionless, helpless. As he released your wrists, Nick’s hand slid up your leg, reaching your thigh, “That’s better. If you would’ve shut your pretty little mouth sooner I would-”

Nick was too preoccupied to hear the backdoor open. He was forcefully interrupted when his head was bashed into the side of the car, followed by a body shoving him into the brick wall of the club behind them. Nick was met with the end of a sharp dagger held by Loki, his free arm pinned Nick to make sure he had no chance to escape.

“Do you really think an imbecile like you could kidnap a woman without anybody noticing?” Loki hissed, fury radiating in his eyes.

“I- Uh-” Nick stammered, sweat beading down his face, “I was taking her to the hospital. She fainted and I thought she needed help.”

“Really?” Loki shoved the dagger closer to Nick’s neck, nearly drawing blood. “And you wouldn’t think to look for the people she came with to aid her?”

“L-Look man, I didn’t know. She told me she came alone.”

“Don’t lie to me. I’ll have you know I’m particularly skilled in the art of lies.”

While Loki interrogated Nick, Maya and Lilly came crashing through the door. They were alarmed when they saw Loki’s knife to Nick’s throat, but horrified when they saw you unconscious in the backseat of Nick’s truck.

“Holy shit, Y/N!” Maya ran to you, carefully sitting your body up. “Hey, Y/N can you hear me? Come on you gotta wake up.” She was stroking your face in a soothing manner, hoping you would wake up.

Lilly stepped next to Loki glaring at Nick, “Who the hell is this pervert?”

“That is an excellent question.” A thought settled in Loki’s mind. Was this man with Hydra? Could he be trying to kidnap you for them? “Who do you work for?” He demanded.

“I’m not telling you.” Nick sneered, somehow still feeling cocky.

Loki gave Nick a sadistic smile, “Let’s try that again.” Without warning Loki punched Nick in the stomach causing him to keel over onto his knees. Loki grabbed a handful of Nick’s hair on the back of his scalp and with a swift motion jerked his head to meet Loki’s eyes before punching him on the jaw. Nick collapsed from the blow, blood pooling from his nose and mouth. “One. Last. Time.” Loki dug his heel in Nick’s shoulder, pinning him where he was sprawled out on the ground, “Who do you work for? Is it with Hydra?”

Nick spit a mouthful of blood on the ground, “With who? No dude! I work for a firm a few blocks away.”

Loki scowled, knowing that he wasn’t telling the truth. “May I remind you that while I have my foot in a particularly breakable area that I am the god of lies.” He let gravity bring his weight down onto Nick. “Out of everybody inside you chose Y/N specifically. Why?”

Nick let out a harsh grunt, “I can’t say! If I do they’ll kill me.”

“If you don’t tell, I’ll make sure of it personally that you’ll experience things far worse than death.” Loki dug further, an audible crack could be heard from Nick’s shoulder.

“F-Fine! I’ll tell, I’ll tell!” Loki released some of his weight but didn’t allow Nick complete freedom, “We worked together years ago, back in the children’s facility. I mean, not directly together, but the same division. I saw her in the tabloids the other day when she was with Tony Stark in Greenwich.” Maya and Lilly gave him strange looks, “Okay yeah I read tabloids. When I saw her picture I tracked her down.”

“What were you planning to do exactly?” Loki sneered.

“I-I figured I would take her to the higher ups as a surprise gift, get a promotion and a raise maybe?” Nick started to sweat from everybody’s eyes throwing daggers, “Bringing back one of the most notorious agents that’s been presumed dead would definitely give me points! I mean, killing a couple of tots is one thing but her? It was practically an extermination.”

The fire in Loki’s eyes fumed at Nick’s words. He dug his heel further into Nick’s shoulder causing him to release an audible and painful groan. Loki leaned down to Nick’s ear and with a hushed tone said, “If it were up to me, I would skin you alive and leave you to the rats. Not before I rip you limb from limb with my bare hands.”

Nick was visibly trembling, “P-Please let me go! I swear I won’t tell anybody! Hydra doesn’t even know I’m here, if they did I’d be dead by now!”

Loki gave him a callous smile, “Oh don’t you worry, I’ll make sure you are well protected when I bring you with us where you’ll be happy to answer any and all questions we may have.” With one final swift kick to Nick sternum, Loki took a few steps away to admire his bloody work until he noticed you being supported by Maya. He rushed to her side to take you in his arms. You were like a rag doll having no control over your limbs. Your head constantly lolled back before Loki decided to carry you bridal style.

“It’s against my creed to cause harm to others,” Lilly strode to Nick who was trying to stand up, “but since you tried to kidnap my friend I can make the exception.” With that she kicked Nick as hard as she could in the ribs making him fall back on the ground.

“Yeah, you piece of shit!” Maya stood by Lilly and gave Nick a similar blow but to his side, causing him to cough and gasp for air.

The girls turned to you in Loki’s arms almost lifeless. “We need to take her to the hospital.” Lilly said, taking her phone out to call an ambulance.

“No,” said Loki, looking down to your expressionless face, “I am responsible for Y/N. Let me take care of her, we have all the medical supplies she needs at the headquarters.”

At first Maya was doubtful of his decision, but reluctantly agreed while she took out a pen and paper from her purse, “Here’s our numbers,” she said, “if Y/N gets worse call us.”

“Please do.” Lilly said, “I feel sick to my stomach about what happened.”

Loki nodded, taking the paper, “She’s very fortunate to have you as friends. You both seem to care about her very much.” Loki said, looking at your unresponsive face. You seemed peaceful, vulnerable. Loki couldn’t place it, but for some reason at this very moment he felt more protective of you. Or perhaps it was the adrenaline rush he experienced making him think this way.

“Uh, guys? Where did he go?” Lilly pointed to where Nick’s broken body was.

Maya ran to the end of the alley towards the street, throwing her arms in an exasperated shrug. “He’s gone. Sonofabitch booked it.”

“You don’t think he’ll come back, do you?” Lilly asked Loki, still carrying you in his arms.

Loki shook his head, “No, I believe he was telling the truth that they will kill him for failing an unauthorized mission. If he has the brain capacity he won’t tell his superiors of this night, neither shall we. If I may make a request, let’s not discuss this night with anyone, especially with our colleagues.”

“We won’t.”

“What happened tonight stays out here,” Maya began, “but we’re still here for Y/N no matter what. But what’s Hydra?”

“Yeah,” said Lilly, “he mentioned that they worked together, but Y/N never liked to talk about her past.”

Loki hesitated, “I believe that is a question that she needs to answer for you another time. It’s rather… complicated, to say the least.”

Maya and Lilly nodded, “We understand,” said Maya, “I think we all have shit in our past we want to forget.”

Loki sighed, “I know that all too well. I must be going now. I will contact you when she wakes up.” Loki bid Maya and Lilly farewell, then promptly left the alley with you in his arms.

---Summary: You're getting really tired of Loki's ego and arrogance.Word Count: 3,144A/N: WARNING: This chapter will depict sensitive subjects towards the end. Read at your own risk.Chapter 10 | Chapter 12

The drive back was quiet. It wasn’t an awkward sort of quiet, more so the type that you both needed after everything that happened. If you were a normal person you would linger on the memories of what led to your potential kidnapping. From when you met Nick, not paying attention to your drink for a split second, passing out, you would want to call the police and talk about your trauma with somebody, anybody. Yet you were far from being a normal person. Another one of your training lessons was to move on from any traumas you’ve experienced. You weren’t allowed to hold on.

“Loki?” He tilted his head to you, “You don’t think Nick was a Hydra agent, do you?”

Loki clenched his jaw, luckily you were focused too much on the road that you didn’t notice, “No. I assure you I interrogated him and from what he could blubber he was just another lowlife mortal waiting for prey.”

“Oh.” You sighed in relief. You were already worried about getting back without being seen, having a Hydra spy on your as surely wouldn’t have helped.

Thankfully when you returned to the headquarters there was nobody around when you parked the car back in the garage. It was after three in the morning, so you assumed there wasn’t anyone still working, yet you still wanted to take precaution. Upon leaving the garage, you took your heels off to make less noise. There didn’t seem to be anyone around, until with no forewarning Loki grabbed your shoulders to pin you to the nearest wall.

“Ugh!” You grunted, you saw him put his finger to his lips. Peeking around there were two lab assistants walking down the hallway in your direction. Body still and breath hitched, you waited for them to leave before speaking, “Could you be a little more gentle? I’m still kind of queasy.”

“Only if you ask politely.” He countered with a playful smirk.

You rolled your eyes, then you moved him aside to get to the elevators. Once the two of you were in you pressed the button to your floor. There wasn’t much else to look at, so out of the corner of your eye you observed the enigma of the demigod standing right there. You had no idea what to make of Loki. The first day you met you wanted to figure him out like a human puzzle. Loki’s eyes spoke so much yet the way he presents himself left you utterly clueless. One moment you were absolutely nothing to him, then he hated your guts, then he saves your life. Surely he only saved you because he needed to get back as much as you did, given you were his ride home. However, he was so gentle and sincere to you when you were in the car after everything happened. Was this all an elaborate game he concocted just to mess with you? What made you so special that Loki decided you were his perfect target?

The elevator’s ding woke you from your thoughts. You peered through the doors into the halls to find nobody there. It was home bound for both of you until your stomach dropped with sudden realization. The security cameras.

“Shit. Shit shit shit!” You whispered.

“What?” Loki queried.

“The cameras. I completely forgot about the cameras.”

Loki smiled in his mischievous manner, “Fortunately for us, I planned ahead.” As if on cue down the hall your bedroom door opened with… you coming out? You were in your pajamas, mug in hand walking to the water cooler next to the elevators. Seeing not-you was the weirdest thing you have ever witnessed. Loki’s illusion of you was almost to a T from the way you walked to the specific freckles you had on your body. Loki stepped out of the elevator next to your doppelganger filling your mug. “What do you think?”

You stepped out as well, observing yourself closer, “So the cameras can’t see us right now?”

“Only my illusion.” He said as you went back to your room.

“I hate to admit it, but that’s kind of cool and really handy.”

You both made your way to your respected rooms. Your feet were sore, your head was throbbing, and overall you were a mess. The only thing you wanted to do was sleep and sleep and sleep. Although you wish you could do more of that if it wasn’t for your deal with Loki.

“I guess I’ll see you first thing with a to-do list.” You said to Loki before entering your room.

Loki looked at you puzzled, “I’m sorry?”

“Our deal. I have to be your personal assistant for two weeks, remember?”

Loki didn’t say anything, instead he thought for a moment. “Forget about the agreement.”

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, “Huh?”

“After everything, I thought about our bargain and I’m changing it.”

“To what?”

“Instead of you following my orders, I would like to train you to fight.”

Train you to fight? Was he being serious? There was no way he was serious. However, with his fixed expression he was definitely being serious. “I don’t need you to train me. I spent my whole life fighting in dozens of different styles and forms. Hell, I even beat the freakin’ Winter Soldier.”

“Beating one man doesn't mean you can take on the world.” Loki turned his gaze to the ground, then back to you, “You were defenseless, helpless against that neanderthal. If I wasn’t there he would have had his way with you.”

You were getting annoyed by Loki’s sudden tone, “Oh please, I could’ve taken him when I came to.”

“What if you didn’t?!” Loki raised his voice in frustration while he took a step towards you. Your breath hitched with his sudden proximity. His stature was tall and brooding, but as before his eyes told a different story as they were filled with concern and grief.

You nodded your head ever so slightly. “Okay.” You whispered, “We can change the deal.”

Loki relaxed his shoulders, taking a step back towards his room. “Good. First thing in the morning we’ll meet in the sparring pit.”

Nodding, you opened your door to the familiar surroundings of your room. You were nearly all the way in when you stopped yourself, “Loki?” You called him before his door was shut. He quickly threw the door back open to see you, “I… Uh, I’ll see you in the morning.” Was all you could say.

Loki paused, as if he was waiting for you to say something different, “Goodnight, Y/N.” The way he said your name made something inside of you flutter. The feeling was gone when the two of you closed your doors.

You stripped down your dress and fancy underwear and into a pair of pajama pants and t-shirt that was probably a few days old. You didn’t care about the light smell, all you wanted was blissful unconsciousness. You grabbed a makeup wipe and rubbed the gunk off of your face to the best of your ability. Next was the jewelry that you haphazardly tossed on your nightstand along with your purse and phone before throwing yourself onto your bed. You awaited for sleep but every few minutes a certain god of mischief invaded your mind, his voice whispering only your name. The next few weeks of training were going to drag on.

#spies and gods #spies and gods chapter 12 #loki #loki x reader #mcu #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #marvel mcu #loki mcu #Loki Laufeyson #reader #reader insert #my fic #fanfiction #fanfic #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction

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sighingstarbeam · 4 years

Text

Spies and Gods - Chapter 11

Summary: You're getting really tired of Loki's ego and arrogance.

Word Count: 3,144

A/N: WARNING: This chapter will depict sensitive subjects towards the end. Read at your own risk.

Chapter 10 | Chapter 12

You’ve been inside of many nightclubs in your life, but every time you enter one it’s an entirely different experience. Behind the double doors from the lobby was the actual club full of flashing neon lights, electronic music with a heavy bass, and intoxicated people shoulder to shoulder sweating on each other. Not only did you see all of this, but the smell was thick with sweat, alcohol, and smoke from the fog machines. The first time you were in a nightclub it was in Germany for a mission. You were seventeen at the time and never had alcohol, so before the mission you were forced to drink to the brink of intoxication to build a tolerance, which would explain why you can down three shots in under an hour and still feel fine. You were so nervous that your cover would be blown, you almost puked on your target as you flirted with him. Fortunately you managed to take him out successfully with no witnesses and no vomit. After that there was only one other time you went to a club for business rather than pleasure, but living with Maya and Lilly you learned to enjoy the blaring music and fancy light shows. You didn’t have to look over your shoulder expecting a gun to your head. You could finally have fun.

Your attention shifted to Loki, his expression vacant. You couldn’t tell if he was overwhelmed, underwhelmed, the right-amount-of-whelmed. You nudged his shoulder, his focus on you now, “Let’s go find my friends, they rented a private booth somewhere.” You yelled over the music. He nodded, allowing you to take the lead.

You squeezed by people, looking at every table and booth trying to recognize your friends. At one time you thought you found Maya dancing on the table, but it was some other girl who definitely had too much to drink. You finally spotted them on the side of the club opposite of the bar with some other girls. They all had drinks in hand, laughing and dancing along with the music. You didn’t recognize the other girls, but you trudged your way towards them. The crowd got a bit tighter as you moved, without thinking you grabbed Loki’s hand so you didn’t lose him. You didn’t realize what you’ve done until the crowd cleared, allowing you easier access to the booth. You let go of his hand the moment you were in clear sight of the table.

“Oh my God Y/N!” Lilly squealed, bending over the velvet rope divider to give you a tight hug, “I’m so happy you came! I want you to meet Gabby and Kat, they’re my coworkers, and this is Ana, my roommate from college.” They waved to you except for Kat, who was dancing, lost to the music. She noticed the present you bought her, “Is this for me? Thank you!” Lilly grabbed it and placed it in a small pile of other gifts.

Maya stepped out from behind Lilly, going in to give you a hug as well, “It’s good to see you girl. You scared us when we found-” Maya’s eyes shifted to the tall figure by your side, suddenly adjusting her hair, “And uh, is this your plus one?” You found Lilly also goggled to Loki.

“Guys, this is Loki. He lives in the headquarters with me. And he’s only being limited to two drinks tonight so don’t even order anything for him.”

Loki scooted you over to be in front of the girls, “The pleasure is all mine. Y/N never told me I would be in the presence of two goddesses.” If you were in a cartoon, you’d roll your eyes right out of your skull. Maya and Lilly were instantly swooned by his charms. You were already second guessing yourself, now for sure you regret bringing him along.

“Drinks? Anyone? Me, yes. I need a drink.” You interjected between them, eyeing the self service bottles on the group’s table. From what you could tell there was a bottle of champagne, vodka, two skinny pitchers of cranberry and orange juice, and a container filled with ice. You poured yourself a glass filled heavily of vodka with a splash of orange juice, knowing that this was going to be a long night.

---

After an hour of drinking, present opening, and listening to Loki schmooze his way with the group, you were beginning to feel mentally drained. You didn’t want to leave yet however, you wanted to at least stay to make sure everyone went home safely. Somehow you felt protective over Lilly and Maya. Not in a controlling matter, but you would do anything to make sure no harm came to them. Maybe it was because they were the first people you met that showed you an ounce of compassion. Your years on your own weren’t kind to you. Getting a job was near impossible, which left you living in abandoned cars and homeless shelters. It wasn’t paradise, but it was better than your previous situation. On the other hand, when Maya and Lilly offered you a home, you thought there was some twist. You even thought they were Hydra agents trying to take you back. After a week of staying with them, you realized they were normal people who could offer you a normal life.

You began to zone out when Loki started talking about himself. Again. As interesting as it is to learn about Asgard and space, it’s not as interesting when they’re only footnotes and him the main focus. The girls were all ogling from his captivating words, maybe a few of them weren’t listening at all while they were too mesmerized by his looks. Not that you were thinking about his attractiveness, you only noticed some of the girls weren’t blinking for a solid minute, their gaze only at Loki.

“And then, I let go.” Loki finished. You snapped back into reality when everybody erupted into a fit of laughter.

“Y/N, your friend here is something else. Have you been keeping him to yourself?” Ana, or maybe it was Kat, teased.

You gulped down some of your drink before speaking, “Uh, no. Technically he’s not even supposed to be out of the building, let alone in the city.”

“The stuff you told me and Lilly was just the tip of the iceberg, wasn’t it?” Maya slurred, the drinks already getting to her.

Loki turned to you, “Oh, you’ve told them about me?” He placed his hand under his chin in curiosity, his grin toying you, “Do tell, what did you share?”

“Nothing much,” you shrugged, you had a feeling he was trying to play a game that you weren’t going to fall for, “I only told them how you live across from me, how annoying you are, oh- and how you’re the little brother of Thor.”

Loki didn’t like you bringing up his brother at all. However, that didn’t stop him from showing off his cheerful facade. If you blinked you would have missed the flicker in his eye giving away his true emotion.

“Thor’s your brother!” Lilly exclaimed, “What’s he like? Oh he seems so nice-”

“Not to mention he’s really cute,” Kat, or maybe it was Ana, chimed in, “all of those muscles that could tear through a shirt…”

Gabby scooted in on the conversation, “Is Captain America really tall in person? I bet he’s tall!”

Loki’s mask was slowly falling as the girls discussed which Avenger was cuter instead of paying attention to him. You couldn’t help but smile when his eye twitched in irritation from the mention of his brother. From the stories you were told you could tell he was outshined by his brother’s fame and power, even if they were raised in a lavish royal lifestyle together. You would think that they would be treated as equals. Then again, Thor was the oldest, making him first in line to be king. Whatever, now wasn’t the time to throw a pity party for Loki. You wanted a nice night out with your friends instead of being stuck playing nanny while Loki gets all of the attention. You might as well have fun with it.

The girls squabbled back and forth between each other for a while over who was the best and sexiest Avenger before Loki piped in, “As much as I love to hear you discuss about my, associates, you should really be asking Y/N here.”

Where was he going with this? You thought, staring Loki down questionably.

“Y/N?” Gabby asked.

“Oh yes,” he continued, “she has more of a relationship with them. Especially with the dear old Captain.”

You choked on your drink. There’s no way he would think that you and Steve were more than friends. True you thought of him as handsome, and nice, and funny, and you get along with him very well, but that didn’t mean you had feelings for him in a romantic way. You respected him too much as a leader of the team. However, you’d be lying if you said you never thought about Steve in that matter for a brief second, except you would never act on it. It would be too weird to date a coworker, especially one in the same building where you live and work no doubt.

The girls scooted in closer, suddenly interested in you for the first time the entire night. “You didn’t say you were getting close with Captain America.” Lilly said.

You set your now empty glass down, “No- I mean yes, but not like that.” You sputtered out, “Steve and I are friends. He was very kind when I first moved in and in general is a very pleasant guy.”

“So you’re saying he’s single?” Ana, you were sure this time, asked. “You don’t happen to have his number on you, do you?”

“I don’t know. We don’t talk about relationships much-”

“Is there anyone there you are dating?” asked Gabby.

“Maybe it’s Thor, I can definitely see you two dating.”

“No, no I can see her with that bow guy, Birdeye or something?”

“Hawkeye, and I see her with Falcon, he seems like the bold type.”

You were at a loss for words. Lilly and Maya excused themselves to go to the bathroom, leaving you with Lilly’s friends talking over each other. It was a constant string of questions and assumptions about your relationship with the group. Not even the blaring music could drown their endless jabbering.

You went to pour another glass when you realized the bottle was empty. “I’m gonna go grab something strong from the bar.” Without waiting for an answer, you hastily crossed the velvet barrier to the bar on the opposite end of the room. You waited for the bartender, forcing yourself not to look back at your party who was just on the other side of the room, the view obstructed by a mob of dancers.

Anger was boiling inside you. How dare Loki ruin your rare night of fun. You didn’t want to bring him in the first place, you had no other choice but to. Well, technically you could have stayed in your room to binge watch TV, but you already owed Maya and Lilly so much, the least you could do was show up and celebrate Lilly’s birthday. Instead you had to listen to Loki ramble on and on about how great he is, the worst part that everyone was sucking it up. It wasn’t like you expected to be the center of attention, however it would be appreciated if you could have a conversation that wasn’t Avengers related for five minutes. That’s what pissed you off the most. That was Loki’s play. He knew that you needed a break from the team after weeks of being around them every second of the day. Bringing them up would get the girls going, therefore Loki winning this selfish game.

Your drink was brought yet you didn’t move from your spot. You weren’t ready to go back, not yet, until a presence appeared next to you.

It was none other than the prick of the night, “What do you want?” You spat.

“The ladies wondered where you slithered off to.” Loki replied, flagging down the bartender for a drink, “They have so many more questions for you about your companions.”

Your grip was tight on the glass. You refrained from breaking it into a million shards, “Tell them that after this drink we’re leaving.”

“So soon? The night is still young.”

“Yeah, well I didn’t want to leave either, but you proved that you can’t be trusted one night outside of HQ.”

“Trusted?” Loki was taken aback, “Possibly what have I done to make myself untrustworthy?”

You turned to him, your eyes piercing like daggers, “Oh, I don’t know, making this night all about you instead of my friend who deserves it, implying that I’m hooking up with one of the guys, which led to a tidal wave of questions that were a bit too personal about my colleagues.”

“May I remind you that you were the one who started it?” Loki retorted.

“Excuse me?”

“You were the one who brought up Thor,” the bartender brought Loki his drink. He ignored it, his focus on you, “if you didn’t say his name then the night would have run smoothly. It’s just like him to mess everything up, even when he’s not here.”

Jaw tight, you sneered your next words, “Is that what happened during your failed conquest?”

Loki stiffened. If he had his drink there would be no doubt that it would be shattered in his palm. “Finish your damn drink so we may go.” With that Loki grabbed his glass, storming off back to the girls.

If only you could punch something right about now. All you could think about was how much of an ass he was before, but now he crossed so many lines. You were dreading the drive back home.

As you drank you calmed yourself down. You don’t remember what number you were at with your drinks, but you could finally feel a slight buzz. This was your final drink before drinking some water and heading out.

You waved down the bartender for a glass of water when you felt another presence next to you. “Can you just leave me alo-” You assumed it was Loki, but you were greeted by an unfamiliar, yet attractive, face.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I just thought you were looking lonely by yourself here.” He grinned, taking a sip of his own drink.

“Shit, no I should be the one apologizing.” You rubbed the back of your neck in embarrassment, “I thought you were somebody else.”

“This somebody else sounds like a not so pleasant person.” He extended a hand, “I’m Nick.”

You shook his hand, “Y/N.”

“So Y/N, what’s a girl like you doing in a place like this?”

You snorted, “You’re really gonna use that cheesy phrase?”

Nick laughed, “Only if it works.”

You sighed, “I’m here for a friend’s birthday. I would stay longer but I have to take another… friend, home soon.”

“Is this friend the one you don’t want to deal with right now?”

“Yes. Not the one with the birthday, the other one.”

“I’m sure they wouldn’t mind if you stayed for another drink, I’ll buy.” Without a response he ordered two drinks, one for him and one for you.

You shook your head, “I really shouldn’t. I’m the driver so I gotta stay as sober as I can.”

“You don’t have to finish it,” when the drinks came he pushed one towards you, “I just want to make up an excuse to talk to you. Only if you humor me.”

It only took one look to your table to see Loki, once again, charming the women with his egotistical stories. “Hell, we're here to have fun, right? One more drink couldn’t hurt, he can wait fifteen more minutes.” Nick and you clinked glasses before taking a swig.

Talking to Nick helped you get your mind off of not only Loki, but the Avengers as well. You talked about your favorite things, which you both had a lot similar interests. He didn’t talk about himself much, he was more interested in you. For the first time tonight you were having an enjoyable time.

About twenty minutes passed while you were talking to Nick. “Do you want to go dance?” He motioned to the dance floor, filled with sweaty people and flashing lights. “Just for a bit, I promise.”

You looked again at your group, still enthralled with Loki. “Absolutely.” Before the two of you stood, you took one last gulp of liquid courage, eyeing the table. Maybe it was the trick of the lights, but as you and Nick left for the dance floor you saw Loki look at you with either wariness, worry, or maybe jealousy? Either way, you left with Nick to the flashing floor and blaring bass music.

The phrase “dance like nobody's watching” did justice for the crowd. So many people were so engulfed in the moment they didn’t notice two more squeeze in. You wanted to follow along. Let everything go, get lost in the music, feel your limbs go limp.

That last part was happening a bit more quickly than you expected.

You thought at first that you danced too hard too fast, or maybe the drinks were finally hitting you all at once. Your arms felt slumped to your sides while your head was spinning in circles, black dots were darting everywhere. A body was keeping you from falling to the ground, but there were so many people you couldn’t tell if it was Nick or someone else.

“Hey, you okay?” Nick asked, holding you steady.

“Y-Yeah, I just d-don’t feel so hot.” You slurred.

“Let’s get you out of here.” Nick wrapped his arm around your waist, his other arm on your shoulders to keep your balance.

“I-I can’t, I need to get my friend home.” For some reason you could only think about Loki. He needed to get home. You needed to get home.

Nick hushed you, “I’ll make sure he gets home. I’ll take care of you.”

You vaguely remember Nick taking you outside, but it wasn’t from the front entrance. There was another door that led to an alley where you started losing consciousness. A black truck was parked on the side. Fear immediately took control.

If only you could scream until your throat gave out. Yell for somebody to help you, to get you out of here. You wanted to fight with every ounce of strength you had, but all of it was depleted elsewhere. You wished you stayed in your room, ordered a pizza, take Lilly and Maya out another day, your treat. But that never happened.

Everything went black.

#spies and gods #spies and gods chapter 11 #loki #reader x loki #chapter 11 #marvel #marvel mcu #mcu #loki mcu #Loki Laufeyson #reader #reader insert #my fic #fanfiction #fanfic #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction

6 notes · View notes

sighingstarbeam · 4 years

Text

Spies and Gods - Chapter 10

Summary: You and Loki head out on a night on the town. But you need to make a pit stop along the way.

Word Count: 3,245

A/N: It's finally here! I'm finished with my classes and I have some time to write. With everything going on in the world right now, I'll try my best to upload more chapters, hopefully I can pry one out every week and get a schedule up and going. Thanks for the patience and stay safe!

Chapter 9 | Chapter 11

The next hour you debated if your decision was right. Your mind kept weighing the polar opposite options yet you put on your makeup as if you already made your choice. Every time you thought about going back to Loki’s room and calling the deal off you lingered to how you deserved a night out with your friends, even if Loki was in the background. On the other hand, when you thought about how much you wanted to leave the facility, what would happen if you got caught? New York was big, yes, and you never told anyone which nightclub you were going to specifically as there were hundreds just in the city alone, but if someone saw you leave and grew suspicious who’s to say what would happen? So many scenarios scattered in your brain. That person would rat you out to the team, they’d shun you for the rest of your life, Tony would kick you out immediately, he would second guess why he let you stay in the first place, which was something you never quite fully understood. If worse came to worse, you could always move back in with Lilly and Maya. But what if they thought you abandoned them? You didn’t mean to. In fact, you were forced to leave your current living situation. They wouldn’t lea- Before your headache could grow any larger, you heard a knock on your bathroom door. Your breath hitched when a familiar voice spoke up, “It’s me,” Tony said, “I’m sorry about before, but we really need you to do this. We’ll celebrate with a restaurant, your choice, just us two to get to know each other. Maybe Pepper. No, not Pepper.” You could practically hear his head rushing with what he was trying to spit out as he hesitated, “What I’m trying to say is we’re heading out. Don’t let Loki… Honestly don’t let him do anything but breathe and blink. Steve and his squad should be back tomorrow from their mission. Hang tight until then.” You didn’t say anything, you were processing the fact that Tony actually said the words “I’m sorry” to you. On top of that he wanted to take you out to dinner and have a real conversation. Not just the chats you have in the lab about his works, but about both of your lives, something you have secretly been yearning since day one. “O-Okay.” You stammered, careful not to burn yourself on the curling rod, “See you later.” Great, now you’ll feel some guilt for sneaking out. To be fair, it was Tony’s own fault for not letting you live your life. About an hour later you were dolled up in makeup and a form fitting maroon dress with off shoulder sleeves that Maya helped you pick out a few months back. It was already 8:00 and you promised you’d arrive at that time. You quickly texted Maya and Lilly that you were heading out and you had to “pick up a friend”. Speaking of which, you needed to tell Loki you were ready. Peeking your head out of your door, purse in hand, you checked the hall if anyone was around. Your heels clacked on the linoleum tile as you crossed the few feet to Loki’s door. You knocked sharply, waiting for him to emerge. A part of you wanted him to not answer, for him to end his own deal so you could have a reason to stay home. Or you could leave him alone and go by yourself and deal with the repercussions later. Well, somebody was listening and decided to pull a joke on you as Loki opened the door. You would’ve noticed him looking at you surprised by how you were dressed if it weren’t for the fact that you were too distracted by his attire. He went with his usual Asgardian wear of green, gold, and black leather outfitted with actual gold bands. “What are you wearing?” You asked. “What do you mean?” Loki questioned. “We’re going to a party in a club, not a renaissance fair.” Loki was taken aback from your comment, “I am dressed for a party. In Asgard this was standard attire for events our family held.” You rubbed the bridge of your nose out of frustration, “You’re on Earth now. You got to own something like a suit.” In almost an instant a shimmer of gold surrounded his head as a helmet with long horns manifested on Loki’s head, “How is this?” He mused. You crossed your arms, “If you can do that, you can illusion yourself human clothes.” Loki stared you down, then sighed rolling his eyes, knowing he wouldn’t win this situation. The golden shimmer surrounded him as he changed into the black suit he wore on the first day you saw him. “This should suffice, but know this; ” He leaned in, a little too close for comfort, before hissing his next words, “this night will not grant you permission to treat me like a cornered dog. Just because this is your planet does not give you access to order me whenever you please. I am a god in this realm- and for a moment your divine ruler.” You resisted the urge to step back from his proximity, for doing so would only pin you against the wall. Instead you stood your ground, trying to match the intensity of Loki’s glare. “If you say so. But if you do anything that raises any red flags while we’re out, I won’t hesitate to drag your ass back here early.” You pulled your phone out, it was a few minutes after you were supposed to meet up, plus you needed to pick up a gift. “We gotta go. Does the divine ruler want to stop for some fast food on the way?” You asked sarcastically. Loki’s manner transitioned from his intimidating look to amused as he let out a soft chuckle.

___

Getting to the garage was a lot easier than you expected. With practically everyone gone nobody saw you and Loki made it to the rows of cars that were perfectly lined up. When you were first moving in Tony explained to you that most of the vehicles had keys hung up accordingly on a grid wall. Most of that conversation he mostly bragged that at least three-quarters of the cars belonged to him personally, which at least gave you a wide variety to choose from. “Got a preference?” You asked Loki, perusing the key selections. Loki looked back at the cars with a sour look, “Please tell me we are not driving any of those.” You were bemused at his remark, “What’s wrong with them? I mean, sure they’re a bit pretentious like that Ferrari- and those other two Ferrari's… but there are a few cool ones we could borrow.” You scanned the row, a black car caught your eye. “How about this Tesla? I heard they’re pretty cool.” Part of you knew that taking a car that glamorous would catch a few eyes, but if you were going to break the rules might as well go all the way in style. “Whatever you think is best.” Loki responded, “Personally I would never be caught dead in any of these, but if this is the only mode of transportation, then it will be adequate for the night.” No matter what you said to the man you could never seem to satisfy him, even if it was for a moment. You plucked the key from the slot and the two of you made your way to the sleek Tesla. Simultaneously you both entered the car. When you turned the key in the ignition you expected the screen in the dashboard to show different selections, except you were greeted by the display illuminating a video of a lit fireplace. A wave of warmth flooded the car as if the fire actually gave out heat from the heating system. The speakers blasted a funky tune of smooth jazz music, and without warning both yours and Loki’s seat reclined backwards. “Well well well, I didn’t realize this was your true intention for the night.” said Loki, showing off a wicked grin. “If you wanted to go a different route, we could have stayed upstairs.” “What? No! I didn’t-” Your face went beet red. You shot up away from the reclined seat when you tried to fiddle with the controls. After a few buttons pressed and smacks on the screens the fireplace video and heat turned off as well as the music. You readjusted your seat before selecting the maps to enter in the location of the club. God I hope they cleaned in here before we got here. You thought to yourself. “We’re never going to talk about this again.” You only heard a chuckle from the god next to you, your heart was beating out of your chest. Why was it doing that? Maybe it was because you were still in shock by the unexpected romance mode the car was set to. Yes, that was it.

___

Driving in downtown New York at night always brought a sense of surrealistic peace to you. The way the lights lit the structures in the distance, the ambiance, the shadows bent in contrast, everything melded together perfectly. You have only lived in New York for less than a year, but you would consider it to be one of the only few places you enjoyed residing in. After the incident in 2012, you fled as far as you could until you reached Maine. For a year it was your shelter, then Pennsylvania for six months, then Vermont for two years, and so on. You jumped from state to state in the northeast area for five years. For even longer you knew that Tony could be your biological father. At any time you could have gone to Stark Tower, to follow the only lead you had read once in a file years ago. Yet you didn’t. Instead you hid from the past of who you were and what you were forced to do. If it wasn’t for the voice in the back at your head screaming you would have left the country the second you had the chance. When you finally had enough of the voice there was only one remedy you knew that could soothe the coarse yells that have been echoing in your ears. The moment you stepped foot in front of the tower, the voice ceased. Now you wished there was another voice to tell you what to do now. Originally your plan was to leave the country, perhaps Paris, find a cozy cottage on the outskirts of town away from the population. Maybe get a cat or two, maybe a bird. The point was to finally be free and forget the past, to finally be alone. But there was a tug in a different direction. The direction that kept you with your friends, Maya and Lilly. A chance to be part of a family with the Avengers, who’s trust you have gained from most of the team the near two months you’ve been there. Even Bucky was slowly starting to initiate conversations with you. Even with the new, unexpected life that was thrown your way, making the decision to leave it behind or stick with it was a sea of voice in your mind. For tonight however, you were going to drown out the voices with liquor, loud EDM, and dancing. All of course while keeping an eye on the Asgardian prince. Speaking of which, you thought that he has most likely never been to an earthling party. “So…” you droned out, Loki’s gaze still out the window, “I’m sure you probably haven’t been to a club on Earth before, so I’m giving you a heads up that this is going to be different than whatever parties you’re used to.” Loki cocked an eyebrow, finally turning his head to you, “And what parties would that be?” “I don’t know. I thought it was more like royal stuff with balls and fancy dresses.” Considering he was a prince and the stories Thor told you about Asgard (not to mention Thor and Loki’s choice of fashion and speech), you only assumed Loki had only been to medieval like parties. Loki smirked, almost as if he was reminiscing about the memories, “We did have parties similar to those on Asgard. However I have observed and even participated in Midgardian-like events.” “Oh yeah? When was the last time you partied or to put it in simpler terms, ‘go out’?” Loki thought for a moment, “The most recent I recall was on Sakaar. True the ruler was a clueless sociopath who wanted everything his way, but he did throw marvelous events.” “He sounds like somebody I know.” You teased, not getting a very positive response from Loki. You changed the subject before an awkward silence could interfere, “We need to make a pit stop before we get to the club.” “What for?” “I didn’t have time to get my friend a gift.” It was only five minutes later when you got to the store Lilly loved. It was a small spiritual shop that sold crystals, candles, all sorts of things that Lilly had interest in. She’s a self-proclaimed witch, which didn’t bother you, except for certain incense she burned that filled the entire apartment, nearly setting the smoke alarm off. Hopefully they sold something that Lilly would like and didn’t have. You turned off the car and unbuckled when you noticed Loki wasn’t moving, “Come on, I’m not leaving you alone.” Loki gave an annoyed look, but quietly obeyed and exited the car. The store was small but had a lot of aisles to peruse. You and Loki definitely were out of place, with it’s dark wood floor and even darker concrete walls. Actually, with Loki’s black suit and demeanor he could fit right in. But you were only there for five minutes tops, not wanting to waste any more time. Going through each aisle you took note of what Lilly would enjoy. Most of the items you knew she already had, except for a few mugs that were cheesy like “Witch Please” or “Witches Be Crazy”. The first thing you needed to do was pick out a birthday card, which thankfully the store had a small display on the side. While reading through the cheesy ones, you settled on a card that had a cat on the cover, but had a thoughtful message on the inside. Looking over to Loki, you found him perplexed at not only the greeting cards, but the general atmosphere of the store. “So this friend, she actually is a witch?” “Yeah, but she doesn’t practice a lot of spells. She mostly does tarot cards and sage burnings.” You didn’t fully understand her lifestyle, but you respected it nonetheless. Loki furrowed his brows before continuing down the aisles. After finding Lilly’s card, you skimmed down the aisle until a book caught your eye. The title read: 101 Love Spells to Spice up Your Relationship. You picked up the book, examining the cover and flipped through a few of the pages, taking notice of the more sensual spells. You actually considered buying it as a joke, until a familiar voice rang in your ear. “I didn’t realize Midgard had spell books, especially of the sultry design.” You jumped from the sudden lack of personal space. Loki was leaning towards your ear, observing the book from your hand. “I’m not buying it.” You blurted, taking a step away that ended more like a shuffle, “I mean, this is just a gag book. I wasn’t actually considering it.” If only you had a mirror to prove to yourself your face was red. You tossed the book back onto the shelf with a thud. Next to it was another book, Spells For Self Care. Flipping through the pages this was the perfect book for Lilly. D.I.Y. organic face masks, spells to calm your mind, even some advice on how to deal with stressful energies. You tucked the book under your arm along with the card, “Let’s get out of here,” you said to Loki, determined for you and him to forget about the conversation prior. The two of you checked out the items along with a gift bag and some colorful tissue paper. You were in there a little over five minutes, but you would still make it to the club in time. The drive was short, but the silence made it feel longer. You didn’t know what to talk about to a literal demigod, and small talk wasn’t your forte in the first place. If it weren’t for the traffic you would speed just a bit faster to get to the club even sooner. What else could you talk about with Loki? So what’s your favorite color? Your hopes and dreams? If you had to marry, kill, or f- “Y/N?” Loki asked. “Hm?” You were so lost in thought you didn’t realize you arrived. “Oh, yeah I’m just looking for a spot.” You pulled into a parking garage a few blocks away. The only space you could squeeze into was on the third story, and just your luck the elevator was out of service, forcing the two of you to walk down the concrete stairs in your heels. When you finally made it to the front of the club, the line wasn’t extremely long, but you remembered Maya saying something about telling the bouncer your name and you were in Lilly’s party. So just as Maya said, the bouncer pulled away the velvet rope, but not before asking about Loki. “He’s with me.” You stated. The bouncer gave a questioning glare, but let him through as well. Before you opened the doors to the club itself, you pulled Loki aside in the lounge. “Before we go in, there are a few ground rules.” Loki rolled his eyes, “I thought we already settled those earlier.” “Yes and no. First off, you’re not allowed out of my sight. If I need to go to the bathroom, my friends are in charge of you. Second, don’t try anything funny. Thor told me you like to play tricks, but not tonight. Are we clear?” He grinned ear to ear, placing his hand on his chest, “I give you my word I will not play a trick on your friends.” “Great.” You nodded, averting your gaze, “And one question, do you think anybody will recognize you?” Loki’s grin slowly faded as he tilted his head, “What do you mean?” “Your reputation isn’t exactly… favorable. I don’t know how much you made the news.” “You didn’t know who I was when we first met.” He had a point, you were a bit busy escaping with your life from actual creatures. “Not many people cared to memorize this face. I’ve been here long enough and nobody bats an eye. Now I must ask you the same question.” You tilted your head this time, “I was told of your predicament. Are you sure no one will recognize you?” To be honest, you didn’t know. You’ve been really good about keeping out of trouble, and you haven’t seen any agents in years. “I’m sure we’ll both be fine.” Loki’s grin curved its way back in, “Great.” You sure as hell hoped you sounded convincing. Not just for him, but for yourself.

#spies and gods #spies and gods chapter 10 #chapter 10 #loki x reader #loki #Loki Laufeyson #mcu #marvel #loki mcu #reader insert #fanfic #my fic #fanfiction #loki fanfiction #loki fanfic

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sighingstarbeam · 4 years

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Hey guys! I know it’s been a hot minute since I’ve updated anything but with it being winter break for me I have some time to finally work on some chapters and new material! You’ll be seeing a new chapter of Spies and Gods as well as the first chapter to a few more fics I’ve been planning.They most likely won’t be released until January 2020 but what a great way to start off the new year.

Anyways happy holidays and I hope everyone has a good new year!

#announcement

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

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Spies and Gods - Chapter 9

Summary: The reader receives some unpleasant news before a night out of town.

Word Count: 2,760

Chapter 8 | Chapter 10

The ride was far from silent. Thor sat in the passenger’s seat chastising his brother about what he’s done. Loki paid no mind to his brother’s words of discouragement as he gazed out the window arms crossed. It was another argument he couldn’t win, what’s the point in fighting back? He knew what he did and had his reasons. If Loki tried to explain it was for the safety of their people Thor would literally throw him out of the moving car. Perhaps if he didn’t perform a mass cloaking spell on the ship the governments of Earth would be helpful. However, last time an enormous ship landed on Earth almost half of New York was destroyed, it was highly doubtful that they wouldn’t shoot first and ask questions later.

You stared at your phone, listening to the one sided argument take place. Your phone vibrated with a text from Lilly inviting you to her birthday party at a local nightclub Saturday night. You responded you’ll try- no, definitely be there. It was time you got out of the headquarters that wasn’t via magic portal.

Looking up Thor was still at it, Loki was still looking out the window, and Tony was annoyed at the both of them. You had ideas floating in the back of your head of how you could help the stranded Asgardians. You knew they’ve been here for a while, but going to a whole new planet with several different cultures, adapting would be difficult and having to watch your home be destroyed didn’t help. They needed to continue to be their own society but still adjust to their new surroundings.

“What if you guys build your own Asgard here on Earth?” You interrupted Thor’s lecture, earning a stare from both him, Loki, and Tony from the rear view mirror. “I mean, there has to be somewhere that has plenty of land or even abandoned buildings to start with.” You shrugged.

“It is kind of you to suggest such a thing, Lady Y/N,” Thor said, turning to get a better view of you, “however, where could we possibly rebuild Asgard that could fit our people? I do not mean to offend, but your people and our people’s lifestyle and traditions are vastly different.”

“Vastly, different.” Loki hissed.

You ignored his remark, turning to Tony, “Don’t you know any governors, Hell even mayors that could help out?”

Tony focused on the road, you couldn’t tell if he heard you or not.

“Tony-”

“Does it have to be in America?” Tony asked.

“What do you saying, Stark?” Thor raised a brow.

“Like you said, your cultures are really different than ours. But not entirely different than Scandinavia. I mean, they worshiped and wrote about you guys, didn’t they? I’m also great buddies with the Prime Minister of Norway, I’m sure they can find a place for some alien refugees.”

Thor and Loki exchanged looks as if they were communicating telepathically. Thor patted Tony on the shoulder, “You would really do this?”

“It’s just a few phone calls. But yeah. You can be in charge of the entire situation since you’re their king and all. On one condition,” Tony pointed behind him towards Loki, “this one stays with us.”

“What?!” Loki nearly lunged forward in his seat if it wasn’t for the seat belt.

“After your stunt we’re keeping an extra close on you. Plus Doctor Weird wouldn’t want you in a different country, not that it would be a problem for him to get to you, but if we allowed that he might request for you to be under his care. Hell I wouldn’t give a damn playing divorced parent for you to be under his custody. But like it or not you’re either our responsibility, the wizard’s, or the government. You can pick.”

Loki tightened his jaw, slumping back in his seat in defeat. Great, you’re stuck with your neighbor longer than you anticipated. You should’ve kept your mouth shut.

Not too long later you all arrived back to Avengers HQ. Loki nearly slammed the car door before he marched to his room, almost running Thor over. Thor didn’t think much of it as he considered Loki’s point of view. Still, he agreed with Tony on keeping him in the care of the Avengers while Asgard was being rebuilt.

“I will alert my people immediately of your plan, Y/N.” Thor patted your shoulder, “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” You patted his shoulder back, although your hand probably felt like a pebble gently tapping on him. “I wanted to help somehow. The thought of an entire people lost on a new world bothered me.”

“It bothers me as well. But hopefully we can make a difference. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go on one of those computers and research your modern day Scandinavia. I’m sure it has changed in the last few thousand years since our people were last there.” With that Thor excused himself, the thought that Thor and Loki were over a thousand years old yet still looked good baffled you.

Tony hasn’t said a word since his promise to talk to the Prime Minister. “I need to get back to my meeting.” Tony blatantly stated. Before you could think to say anything, he went back into his car and sped away, leaving you alone.

_______

The next few days were eerily silent. Everyone was constantly in and out with various missions and assignments. The life of an Avenger wasn’t as lavish or laid back as the media portrayed them it to be. Tony ignored you the day after you and Loki were forced a visit to Doctor Strange. The day after was a bit better when you helped him with his projects, but the cold tension in the air was so thick not even a knife could cut through it. After a while the tension faded, but Tony never explained his reason for being upset, or whatever emotion you could call it. Not only were you helping Tony in the lab, you started to work out again to fill in the time. You didn’t train with the others, but Natasha did spot for you when you needed it. It’s been a while since you worked out, not since you escaped from Hydra. As for Loki, you haven’t talked to him since that day as he was cooped up in his room. Now that you thought about it, you didn’t see him leave once, not even to get food.

Saturday rolled in so fast you almost forgot about Lilly’s birthday. You did forget to get a gift for her, but you figured you could pick something up quickly before the party. You knew you needed the day to get ready. The night club you were meeting at was as Maya described it “the boujee-ist place in all of New York”, so you wanted to look your best. You already had your stylish yet sexy outfit planned out that you’ve been dying to wear out on the town ever since the girls helped you pick it out one day on a shopping spree. You never imagined you would have two friends taking you shopping, giving you a home, and being so understanding on your situation.

You finished taking a long, steamy bath, admiring your not too shabby work shaving your legs. You put a lavender smelling lotion all over your body right before letting the towel from your hair fall to the ground. You admired how much your hair has grown the last few years after being shaved so many times since you were a young teen into your adulthood. From your hair you looked at your body, how much weight you were able to gain back from only getting the bare nutrients and calories, you looked more youthful than you ever did when you were younger.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of people talking down the hallway. You recognized one of the voices as Tony. He would be leaving tonight with Thor for Norway, so now was your chance to try and clear the air before he left.

Drying your hair the best you can to stop it from dripping, you slipped on a bathrobe and opened your door. Tony was walking with a few other men wearing lab coats. You figured they helped him with other projects as you recognized a few they listed as Tony told them what to focus on this weekend while he was gone.

“Tony,” you grabbed his attention after he was a few feet away from your room, “can we talk for a minute?”

Tony nodded to the other men, patting one on the shoulder before they entered the elevator down the hall, “What do you need?”

This was the most words he’s given you the last few days. You weren’t going to let him give you the silent treatment any longer, “Are you mad at me for something?”

Tony looked confused, “I’m not mad. Why would you think that?”

“I dunno,” you leaned against your door frame, “we haven’t had a real conversation with more than three sentences since before the other day with you know who.” You tilted your head in the direction of Loki’s room.

Tony looked at Loki’s door, expecting him to make a grand appearance at any moment, “Listen kid, I admit I was more than… irritated, when I got the call that Loki was out of the building, but it wasn’t meant to be directed towards you.” It wasn’t much of an apology, but you figured that’s the closest you would get to one.

“I get it. I’m glad we’re actually talking, but I need to finish getting ready.” You remembered you were standing in the hallway in nothing but your bathrobe.

“Um, getting ready for what exactly?”

“I’m going out with my friends for Lilly’s birthday. It’s just going to be dinner and a few drinks.”

“When did you plan on telling me this?” Tony said, crossing his arms, his tone straying into strict dad territory.

“I was going to mention it when I got the text, but we were in the car and I never got the chance. Besides, you didn’t really need to know the second I got the invite.”

“Yes I did need to know, because you’re not going.”

Your jaw dropped, “I’m not going?” You asked, starting to get pissed off at Tony yet again for something ridiculous.

“You heard right,” he said, “If I knew that day we could’ve made arrangements, but Thor and I are heading to Norway tonight and everyone else is busy.”

“There’s no way that there’s absolutely nobody else that can babysit. What about Steve?”

“Infiltrating a terrorist base with Sam and Bucky.”

“Bruce?”

“Not the best idea to have him watch over Hulk’s favorite rag doll.”

“Natasha?”

“Classified.”

“Wanda or Vision?”

“Double date with Clint and his wife that they’ve been planning for months.”

“What about all those other agents, scientists, or whatever they are? You can’t tell me they’re all busy.” You started to raise your voice in frustration.

“For the most part, yeah, they are. I can’t ask every single one of them. Especially with this short notice.” Tony raised his voice in return, “I also know for a fact that none of them would even volunteer, they don’t have the balls like you do. You’re on nanny duty. End of discussion.” You couldn’t begin another sentence as Tony left. You were completely dumbfounded that your night was completely ruined, all because of stupid Loki.

“Well, that was quite a conversation.” Speak of the devil. Loki’s head popped out between the door and door frame, blocking your view into his room. You always wondered what his room looked like, whether it was decorated in his style, or if he kept it clean and organized or in disarray. He did like chaos, but maybe living situations was an exception.

“How much of that did you hear?” You adjusted your bathrobe, covering yourself as modest as possible.

“Just a fair amount.” He opened his door enough to show his full body, he was wearing a casual green button up shirt and black pants. It was a little weird seeing him in human clothes as you were accustomed to his Asgardian suits. “I heard you want to go to a party but your poor father wants you to watch over me, correct?”

You didn’t respond. You didn’t want to give him any satisfaction in whatever game he wanted to play. Instead your mind wandered to what you were going to do tonight. First you had to text the girls that you couldn’t make it, you’re sure they would understand given the fact they know you’re living with a literal alien psycho. Maybe you could get into your most comfortable pajamas and binge watch some shows you’ve been meaning to catch up on. “Good night.” You said to Loki, closing your door behind you.

“I could help you.” Loki stepped out of his room, walking the few steps to use his hand to stop you from closing the door.

“Help me with what?” You glared, not wanting to put up with anything else tonight.

“You want to go to this party, I can make it seem like you were here the entire time while you’re out doing, whatever it is Midgards do for fun.” Loki was close enough you could smell his aroma, a mix of cologne and lingering leather. From what you could tell from the way he looked at you he wasn’t going to leave you alone on this.

“What’s the catch?” You asked, “I mean, what’s in it for you? I’m sure you’re not doing this from the bottom of your heart.”

Loki gave you a playful grin, “Allow me to have one night of freedom outside of this building.” The moment he said that you tried to close the door, he pushed against your force, keeping the door open, “Wait, let me explain! All I ask is a single night. I’ve been confined here for weeks, I’ve already read every book or magazine there is to offer, and your ‘television’ is mindless.”

“That’s the point of TV.” You put in extra muscle in to get the door shut, but Loki’s extra human strength overpowered you, “I’ll get you some books another time.”

Loki scoffed, “So you’re going to follow Stark’s orders like a good child?” You stopped pushing on the door. Loki stumbled from your sudden lack of effort, but straightened himself back to his arrogant self. “You may be his daughter, but you don’t have to listen to his every will and command. If you do, we’re both prisoners here.”

You hesitated, processing everything he just said, “If this is going to happen, we need to make a few arrangements.”

Again, Loki showed his wicked smile, “Go on.”

“First, we need to leave long after Tony and Thor are gone. We can’t let anyone see us leave, especially them.”

“Leave that to me. As you know I am the expert in trickery.”

“Second, we would need to be back before tomorrow morning when everyone else gets back. So no random hookups or sleepovers.”

Loki was disgusted, “Please, as if I would ever. Especially with a Midgardian.”

You pinched the bridge of your nose, closing your eyes as you exhaled annoyed. “And lastly, you’re not going off on your own.”

Loki’s mouth opened in shock, “What?!”

“If anyone found out I snuck out on babysitting duty, I’d be in for it. But if they knew I let you go roaming around the city, I’d not only be in for it, they’d have not only my head on a stake, but yours too. Are we clear.”

Loki thought about your bargain for a moment. Yes it would suck having a tagalong on a night you were suppose to have fun, but facing the wrath of the Avengers for ditching is way worse. “Fine. On one condition.” Loki finally said.

You raised an eyebrow.

“You must be my personal assistant for an entire month. Preparing my meals, cleaning my quarters, everything.”

Great, you were sneaking out with the guy now he wants to negotiate? “Make it one week.”

“Three weeks.”

“Two.”

Once again, he bared his coy smile. Loki held out his hand, “Two weeks it is.” You stared at his outstretched hand, then before you could go back on your word you took his hand in yours, giving a firm shake.

Why do you feel like you just made a deal with the devil?

#spies and gods #spies and gods chapter 9 #chapter 9 #loki x reader #loki #Loki Laufeyson #mcu #marvel #loki mcu #reader insert #fanfic #my fic #fanfiction #loki fanfiction #loki fanfic

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

Text

Spies and Gods - Chapter 8

Summary: After falling through a peculiar portal, Reader meets an old "acquaintance" of Loki's.

Word Count: 2,476

A/N: Hi guys! Sorry for the long wait. Here's a quick recap of what's been going on in my life; I just got done with classes and I'm only working a few days a week, allowing me time to work on fics. Now that Endgame is out I've been thinking about how I want to end the fic and how the story will go at this point, which is what I've been planning on doing since the beginning of the story, which is why I've also been putting off writing until the movie came out (mostly my busy life and motivation got in the way, but still). I have a few ideas in mind for the ending, which I might post two or three different endings if I can't decide which one I want to use. Thanks again for kind words! <3

Chapter 7 | Chapter 9

Your body felt as if it was floating, nothing above or below you, only the feeling of weightlessness. A profusion of emotions swept through you. You’ve only been falling for a short moment but confusion, fear, and even a glimmer of peace filled you. Reality returned when you felt hands grabbing your shoulders followed by you slamming into something, hard.

You heard two thuds, the first being something you couldn’t identify, the second was your own body crashing not too long after. You groaned as the air in your chest struggled to return after it was knocked out. Everything was disoriented at first, until your vision adjusted to the room. You were in a foyer with dark walls, a large staircase in front of you, and seats against the walls that look rarely used. You didn’t recognize this place, meaning you could only fear for the worst.

Before you could do anything else, you heard a coarse groan from beneath you. Looking down you realized you landed on top of Loki, still a bit dazed from the free-fall. Loki was on his back while you landed chest first on top of him, your faces merely inches away from each other. His head was leaned back exposing his tense neck and defined jawline, his hands holding on to your shoulders in a protective grip. He didn’t shield you from the fall, did he? “Shit, you okay?” You asked, letting your weight off of him.

Loki’s gaze met yours, “You did crash into me,” he let out a single chuckle, “however, nothing is broken as far as I am aware of.”

“Good, because I need you in one piece for you to explain yourself.” A mysterious voice emerged from the stairway. A tall man in an unusual blue outfit accompanied with a red cape was leaning against the railing, eyes staring directly at Loki. “Loki Laufeyson, brother of Thor.” He let go of the railing and floated down the stairs. Great, he’s one of those people. You and Loki stood up, watching as the man levitated down. When he reached the bottom of the stairs he didn’t bother acknowledging your presence and instead went directly to Loki, “What the hell are you doing back on Earth?”

Loki placed his hands behind his back, “With all of your mystical powers, it took you this long to realize I have returned?” He asked coyly.

“I assume your magic had something to do with it,” the man said, “perhaps some sort of cloaking spell so I couldn’t see you.”

“What a shame, it was working so well up until now.” Loki slyly grinned, almost tauntingly.

“And why is that?” The man asked, “Your spell was up for this long, what caused it to drop all of a sudden?”

Loki’s glare at the man was fierce, he was ready to attack at any moment. You should probably step in before things got out of hand. “Excuse me,” you chimed in, gaining the attention of the man and Loki, “what is it that you want with Loki? He’s under official Avengers supervision. I have to get him back before they send an army to search for him.”

The man’s look was on you, eyes squinted as he finally recognized your presence. “As a protector of this realm, it is my job to keep out anything that is a threat to this Earth. Loki is one of those threats. I have warned him and his brother before that if he were ever to return I would handle it personally.” The man looked at Loki, adjusting his yellow gloves, “It’s time to take you back to Asgard.”

Loki’s posture shifted, his eyes expressed mourning. You remembered what the team told you about what happened to Asgard, Loki and Thor’s home. Loki stood frozen, his fists clenched and slightly shaking.

You raised a pleading hand to the man, “Listen, Mister…?”

“Strange, Doctor Strange.”

You knitted your eyebrows at the sound of his name, “Okay. Doctor Strange, something happened to Asgard. That’s the reason why he’s here.” You stepped closer to Loki, almost guarding him from Strange, “He’s been here for a while and you have to trust me when I say that he has had no intentions of hurting anyone.” Loki raised a brow at your statement. Here you were, standing up for the man who terrorized New York. “The Avengers have been keeping a really close eye on him. I don’t think they’ll be really happy if you take Loki away. Especially his brother.”

Strange furrowed his eyes as he held the bridge of his nose. He thought for what seemed like forever, “Who did you say you were?”

“Y/N L/N.”

“Y/N, you need to understand that Loki isn’t a man who can simply be put under house arrest. You do know what he’s capable of, correct?”

“The question is, do you know what I am truly capable of?” Loki stepped forward, knives appearing in both hands. You sighed in annoyance. Great, everything you just said was just thrown right out of the window. He took a few steps in front of you while Strange took a defensive position.

Before he could do any more damage, you stepped directly in front of Loki, blocking his path. “Loki, don’t.” You pleaded, if he was going to get in trouble, might as well prevent Loki from killing anyone.

“Unless you wish to get yourself hurt, move aside.” Loki sneered.

“Really? You’re gonna threaten me?” At this point you were starting to get pissed. Your muscles ached from the fall, all you wanted to do was go back to HQ and take a long bath. “If you want to resort to violence, be my guest. But if this guy kicks your ass, I’m not going to be the one to drag you back. Just know that I’m the only one here that tried to sincerely defend for you.”

Loki’s eyes softened, but his lips were still pursed. His jaw visibly clenched, and in defeat, he put away his knives.

You turned to Strange, “Can we leave now? We have this taken care of.”

Strange looked at you, then to Loki, then back to you before speaking, “Fine. I’ll let you take him back, on one condition. I will have to visit in person once a week to make sure he isn’t using anymore spells to fool me.”

This didn’t please Loki at all. His mood dropped lower than before, anger rising within him. You felt a small amount of sympathy for him, having to be watched all the time now a magic man has to babysit him. Either way, there was no other answer that Strange would like, “Deal. But I have to run it by the team first.”

“Sounds fair.” Strange swept his cape behind him before he lifted his hands in front of him, “I’ll return you both to where you were-”

“No!” You and Loki yelled simultaneously, neither of you wanted to go through Strange’s weird portal again.

Strange looked at you two questionably, “Oh, it won’t be a problem-”

“Thank you, Doctor Strange,” you interjected, “but I think I’ll just call a ride. I might puke if you do that… whatever, again.”

“Fair enough. Would you like some coffee or tea, Y/N?”

“I would love some. Let me call Stark first.” Tony was the closest you could think of that wasn’t busy on a mission like the others. You could’ve called Thor, but you doubted that he knew how to drive or even had a cell phone.

“Stark? As in Tony Stark?”

You took your phone out of your pocket and dialed Tony’s number in, “Yeah. I’m his kid.”

“Oh, I didn’t realize that he had children.”

You exhaled, “Neither did he.”

Some time later, Loki settled down (to some degree) while you and Strange had coffee. He showed you around and even introduced his cape to you, which was sentient and somehow not the weirdest thing you’ve encountered after your little portal trip. He explained who the Masters of the Mystic Arts are and what they do, how they protect the Earth for possibly thousands of years. It amazed you that a group of magic users hid in plain sight for this long. You knew groups like Hydra tried to hide in plain sight, but they were never known to be subtle.

You all made your way back to the foyer when you heard knocking at the door. Strange used his magic to open the doors by themselves.

Stark entered followed by Thor, but not in a cheery mood. Stark was wearing one of his finer suits that he usually wore at meetings or press conferences. Shit, you completely forgot that he was in a meeting.

“Loki.” Thor said harshly, eyebrows knit. When Loki saw his brother he immediately looked fearful. He knew the difference when Thor was annoyed or genuinely angered. This was one of those angry times. “What is the meaning of this? You told me you already spoke to Doctor Strange and had everything settled between the two of you.”

“Oh, did I?” Loki taunted, “Might have been a lie, dear brother. Do you really think I would come back to this second rate sorcerer and ask to be among Midgardians? It was much more simple to cast a spell that hid us from his forces.”

“Us? You cloaked me as well?”

“Well, not only you.” Thor raised an eyebrow in confusion, “Think about it, an entire cargo ship with hundreds of Asgardians would not go unnoticed.”

Strange turned to Loki, his temper rising, “I’m sorry, an entire cargo ship filled with what ?!”

Thor went stoic, even with one eye his stare bore deep through Loki, “Brother, what did you do?”

All eyes were on Loki now as he tried to play it cool with a coy smile. Unfortunately for him his trickster charms weren’t working. “Remember on Asgard when Heimdall couldn’t see me arrive or leave when I used the secret passages?” Thor continued his stern gaze, waiting for Loki to continue, “I figured I would do something similar with a simple spell not too long before we arrived… on nearly one hundred Asgardians.”

A sharp inhale went out of Thor’s nostrils. He rubbed his forehead in disbelief, “That’s why you have been different lately. This explains the lack of pranks and your use of magic in front of anyone.”

“You focused all of your magical energy to keep your people hidden.” Strange cut in, “Exactly how long did you expect to hold this spell? Surely not the rest of your life as it would drain you from the inside out.”

Loki rolled his eyes, “Of course I wouldn’t go on for that long. For the last month I’ve slowly been letting about a dozen people at a time go from the spell. To anyone like you who can tell the shift in your world, it would merely look like Midgard’s birthrate was slightly higher, but not abnormal.” He looked at Thor, “Did you ever wonder why nobody else has noticed a large ship coming through the atmosphere other than Stark and his little team? And they only knew because we contacted them before entrance.”

The room filled with silence as everyone was trying to process what Loki had done. It didn’t do any harm to the people of Asgard, but to be hidden away and not noticed by the entire world was too far. The Asgardians probably didn’t know Earth didn’t know about them. Here they were, trying to get by with help from only the Avengers when the world could’ve chipped in if they had any idea what was going on. The thought of innocent people under the watch of Earth’s mightiest heroes were struggling to get a hold of their new life when it could easily be fixed bothered you. There are millions of others in the world who need help as well, but this would be a quick start.

“Break the spell now.” You didn’t ask, you demanded. Loki looked at you as if you were some foreign object in the room, “Strange knows. There’s no need for this trick to go on any longer.”

Loki saw the other men silently agree. He knew he didn’t have any say in this. He wanted to say something more, but decided against it. Loki closed his eyes and with a slight clench of his fist, a tiny ripple of gold flowed around his hand. “There. It is done.” He said with a stiff tone.

“Now that that’s taken care of,” Strange pitched in, turning to Tony, “I do trust that the Avengers will keep an extremely close eye on Loki, but I will be making visits to your headquarters every once in a while to make sure he doesn’t have any more tricks up his sleeve.”

Tony was rather annoyed that Strange would show up on his own terms, but reluctantly agreed. Who else would know more about magical fiascos than an actual wizard? “Cool, now we have wizards guarding the castle with the dragon. See you around, Strange. Y/N, Wiseau, car. Now.” Tony spoke to the two of you as if you were children caught breaking a window.

He didn’t look at you as he led everyone outside, revealing a crowd of about a dozen people forming around the highly expensive car. When a few people noticed Tony and Thor, everyone turned and begged for autographs and photos. Tony smiled politely as you all trudged through the crowd, only saying hello and waving to a few people. Thor, on the other hand, took multiple selfies and hugged every other fan like a proper celebrity.

You noticed Loki visibly rolling his eyes at his brother, “Tough being the younger brother?” You asked him.

“Thor’s fame seems to follow him wherever we are.” Loki responded, “The devotees were mild compared to here, but nonetheless the spotlight is brighter in his direction.”

It took longer than intended to reach the car with all these people around. Before entering the car, you heard murmurs coming from the crowd. You made out a few words, which turned to sentences as more and more people talked.

“Who’s that girl?”

“Isn’t that Loki?”

“You don’t think Tony left his fiance for this chick, do you?”

“Maybe she’s Thor’s new girlfriend.”

“No way, Jane was far cooler.”

“Maybe she’s dating Loki.”

“That’s more believable than her and Thor.”

That was enough gossip for one day. You slipped into the back seat of the car, the door muffling the voices of the groupies. Loki sat in the seat next to you, refusing to look anywhere but out the window. Tony and Thor followed soon after, Thor taking the passenger side. Tony slammed the door harshly, then revved the car, speeding away from Bleecker street.

#spies and gods #spies and gods chapter 8 #chapter 8 #loki x reader #Loki Laufeyson #mcu #marvel #reader insert #fanfic #my fic #fanfiction #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

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Spies and Gods - Chapter 7

Summary: Reader wants to try and befriend Loki, but turns out he's a bit more difficult than expected.

Word Count: 3,051

A/N: Hi starlights (that's what I'm calling you lovely people for now on lol)! Sorry for the super later update, classes have gotten busy and quite a lot of personal mishaps occurred, but don't worry! I have a lot of plans for fics including this one, I'm even going to have a schedule to try and upload at least once or twice a month until I can get stabled with my irl schedule, then I could try and go for every other week. Thanks for reading!

Chapter 6 | Chapter 8

The next day you woke up with a to-do list fresh in your head.

First, you were going to fulfill your promise to Tony by helping him with his prototypes. He’s been working on new gear the last month for the team, he wanted you to jot notes down and maybe try one of the devices that won’t blow you up.

Secondly, you wanted to try and decipher your new neighbor, find out what it was that made him so mysterious. You could go with the direct approach, but you didn’t want to seem like an idiot and bug him. Perhaps inching your way little by little into his circle you could eventually discover more about the tall, dark haired demigod.

Before you could check anything off of your list, your stomach begged for something to eat. You changed into a new set of clothes for the day while sending continuous text messages to Lilly and Maya about the deity next door. Their response was what you would’ve expected, with them wanting to meet him and if he was cute. You rolled your eyes and made your way to the kitchen for some breakfast.

There you found the god of thunder drinking coffee from a mug that looked puny with his hand wrapped around it. Thor grinned ear to ear the moment he saw you walk through the doors, “Good morning, daughter of Stark!” He boomed, taking a sip from the tiny mug. “I hope you rested well.”

“Morning.” you forcefully smiled, you didn’t want to tell him of you and his brother’s awkward encounter the night before. You mentally cringed at yourself for going to Loki’s room in the first place. Speaking of which, looking around the room you didn’t see Loki, or frankly anyone else. It was just you and Thor, the god of thunder. This moment sparked an idea, since Thor grew up with Loki he could tell you everything you wanted to know about this god of mischief living next door.

“So, how are you and your brother adjusting here?” You asked, nonchalantly. You didn’t want to appear desperate.

“It’s been splendid!” Thor beamed, “I learn something new about your people’s way of life everyday. Yesterday, Stark showed me this thing called an ‘app’ on my cellular phone where I can match these small, colorful candies and they explode if I match certain ones.” The look on his face when he explained something as simple as Candy Crush made you smile, it was like watching a toddler discovering their reflection for the first time. “As for Loki, he’s taking it steadily. It has not been easy since his first visit here was… unpleasant.”

“Right, with the whole alien invasion thing. Why’s he staying here then? These people kind of did fight and defeat him.”

“Wasn’t entirely his choice,” Thor’s smile slowly descended, yet he still kept his positive vibe and attitude, “since my people have been here, Loki and I have tried our best to get them settled in and accustomed to your culture. We are no longer a kingdom, but I will still visit at the end of the month to make sure everyone is sustaining. I entrusted my good friend Heimdall to keep watch over my people while I help here. After we were done, I wasn’t sure of what to do with Loki. Obviously I couldn’t let him roam on his own, for he is technically a war criminal on this planet, yet I don’t wish to see him locked in prison for eternity. I spoke with Stark and Rogers and they both agreed to keep him here where he will be watched closely but have some freedom.”

“Yet they will still treat me as a prisoner.” A voice broke between you and Thor. There stood the god of mischief in his black and green Asgardian attire, “Pardon me if I’m interrupting your gossip about me, brother.” This was the first time you heard his voice. It was smooth with a touch of roughness when he spoke certain syllables, his accent similar to his brother’s.

“We were not gossiping, Loki, lady Y/N was simply asking about our adjustment to her society.”

Loki looked at you as if he didn’t realize you were there in the first place. His green eyes shifted up and down examining you, “The daughter of Stark. I expected something, different, when I first heard Stark had a child.” The way he spoke was almost demeaning, as if he was deliberately trying to demoralize you.

“What kind of different?” You questioned.

Loki let out a single, breathy laugh, “All mortals are pathetic, but there are few who have exceeded my expectations since my first arrival, including Stark. I would imagine that if he were to have any offspring they would live up to his degree of glory, but I was mistaken. Underwhelmed, as a matter of fact.”

Your blood started boiling in your veins. Who did he think he was to say those things to your face? Loki’s a prince, big whoop. He’s not on his planet now, you’d think that he would have a little more respect to the inhabitants, especially the one across the hall. It took every ounce of your mental and physical state to not sock this guy on the nose. Instead, you clenched your jaw and grabbed your favorite cereal from the cupboard with more force than you intended to. You didn’t care, you continued to get the bowl and spoon while you tried to calm yourself down and ignore Loki’s comments.

“Loki, remember, we are guests. There is no need for such words.” Thor tried to alleviate your anger by taking your side, except it would take a lot more than a stern talk with Loki to calm you down, “These people offered you a home when you know well they could have taken you to their authorities where you would be locked away for the rest of your life. The least you can do is be polite to lady Y/N.”

Loki slowly shook his head, giving Thor a disapproving look, “Is there a difference whether I’m in this prison or another here on Midgard? Either option I am trapped on this wretched planet.”

You paused as you opened the refrigerator, your face hidden behind the door. He really did think of Earth as a prison. But why? From what the rest of the team told you Loki was taken back to Asgard after the attack on New York to pay for his crimes. He acted as if he wanted to be back home to serve his time, or anywhere in fact. Did he feel remorse for the devastation he conflicted all those years ago? No, that couldn’t be it. Still, you thought the same thing when you were with Hydra, desperately wanting to get rid of the cause of your greatest guilt. You didn’t care if you were sent to jail, as long as you were far away from Hydra, the facility you lived in, Kilcher, or anything that was remotely tied to your past. Loki was now stuck on the planet he tried to conquer, constantly reminding him of his own past.

Quit it, stop feeling empathetic for him. Not even a moment ago Loki mocked you, your species, your planet- now’s not the time to feel sorry for him.

Thor glared at his brother, “Brother, you may sulk all you want, but I demand that you apologize to lady Y/N.”

Loki turned his gaze on you, lips pursed in a thin line, “My apologies…” Loki’s eyes looked down before he revealed a coy smirk, “My apologies that my brother has fallen for your filth of a planet.”

The sound of Thor smashing his mug on the counter startled you, fragments of ceramic scattering everywhere. “Loki! I swear by the-”

If Loki was going to be difficult, might as well have fun with it. “It’s okay, Thor,” you reassured him, Loki gave you a puzzled yet intrigued look, “Earth might not be the greatest, and I might not be like Tony, but at least I get to leave the building whenever I want, to wherever I please.” You could see Loki’s jaw tighten, his eyes widen in anger and disbelief while he clenched his hand into a fist. You were able to leave the god of mischief with a silver tongue speechless. What you would do to get a picture of this moment.

You grabbed your bowl of cereal and headed towards the doors, not before giving a peace sign to the Norse gods while you used your foot to open the door. You couldn’t see it from the other side of the closed doors, but you knew that Loki would be throwing a fit. Then you realized you probably shouldn’t have pissed off the powerful being next door. So much for trying to be friendly with Loki.

You tried not to think about Loki or your “discussion” with him and his brother, instead you helped Tony all morning with new prototypes he’s been working on. Most of the devices were add ons for his suits, but you did get to witness a few toys for Steve’s shield like adding an extra force field like thing around it. It had a scientific name, but it was too long for you to remember even the first half of it.

Sitting on one of the worktables, you were doodling on the notepad Tony gave you to write down what happened during the tests to the prototypes. You would take notes, but everything Tony told you to write down were scientific words not even a spelling bee champion could guess to spell it right. So instead you put down words like “thingy” and “sciencey stuff” for every word you couldn’t spell and drew poorly drawn sketches of the devices as well as random patterns along the border.

You were so absorbed in one of your designs, you barely heard Tony call your name. “Hey, Y/N!” Tony snapped his fingers in front of your face, jolting your attention back to reality, “You alive? I’ve been rambling the last five minutes. Did you catch any bit of it?”

“Huh?” You let out, “Oh! Yeah, sorry. I guess I zoned out for. What time is it anyway?”

“Wanting to ditch class, can’t blame you.” Tony looked at his shining watch on his wrist, “It’s been a few hours, I guess we can break for lunch.”

Your stomach growled at the thought of food. Tony waved his hand at a few hologram monitors to turn them off, an idea sparked in your head, “Hey, if you want we could go out to eat. I know this great sandwich shop a few blocks from-”

“Sorry, can’t. I promised Pepper I’d meet with her and the wedding planner when I got the chance.” Something inside of you sank. You’d hope that you’d get to know your dad a bit better in an environment where he wasn’t fiddling with some device larger than a phone. “Okay… What about tonight then?”

Tony hissed in a breath of air, “That’s a no go either, got a meeting. Boring stuff for a mission, but it’s gotta be done.” He saw your obvious shift in mood, “But uh- We can rain check, if you want.”

You shrugged in disappointment, “Sure, rain check.”

Tony was clearly oblivious to your emotions, he winked and left as if nothing happened. You understood that he was a busy person, but he was the one who wanted to connect with you. For the past month you’ve only seen him about once every other day, every day if luck was on your side. When you did see him he was still working in his head, barely paying attention to what anyone was saying, but only chimed in with a snarky Stark remark. You wouldn’t be completely discouraged that he wasn’t paying attention to you as much as you’d hoped if the rest of the Avengers weren’t busy as well. The team either went on missions, meetings, training S.H.I.E.L.D recruits, or some sort of research. At the beginning of your stay you felt as though everyone was together, like a family. With your luck you should’ve figured there was a catch to living with the world’s mightiest heroes.

You left the lab not too long after Tony to find something to eat in the kitchen, suddenly not feeling the urge to go out for food like you intended. Walking down the long corridor with only the sound of your footsteps echoing off the walls filled you with a sense of loneliness. Even though you knew there were people scattered around the building somewhere, there was still that empty pit somewhere deep inside that felt familiar. The last time you’ve felt this hollowness was when you were with Hydra when the rest of the children avoided you after you were thrusted with the role of executioner. Your peers stopped talking to you, sitting near you during meals, even went out of their way to not look at you as if you were a monster who would attack at any moment. They were right. The fact that you are a monster created by monsters was what isolated you, not only from the children, but from becoming someone else.

The sudden twinge in your chest slowed your footing, the memories of Hydra, of Marcus, flooding back. All of those children... You took a deep breath. You needed to find someone to get yourself out of your head.

You barely remembered arriving to the kitchen, but the moment you closed the doors you felt a

moment of relief. Until you saw who was sitting in one of the lounge sofas with a magazine in hand.

“Oh, sorry.” you told Loki, his eyes only shifting at you for a brief second before going back to his magazine, “I didn’t think anyone was here, I thought everyone was out-” his green eyes glared at you as you stopped yourself from speaking anymore. You realized what you said now and your earlier conversation, you thought it would be best to shut it entirely before making things worse. “I’ll just… get something to eat.” You shuffled away as Loki rolled his eyes, going back to the magazine.

The kitchen was usually well stocked, but your stomach couldn’t decipher what it was in the mood for. You looked through the cabinets, drawers, fridge, nothing you saw sounded good, even your favorite leftover takeout. As you searched for your lunch, you glanced to Loki who was still silently reading. You were surprised he was out here instead of cooped up in his room like you were your first week. Maybe Thor forced him out as a start to bond with the others. Speaking of which, you thought you should try to make amends. Not that you were going to apologize since he totally started it, but an act of kindness might suffice.

“Did you want anything while I’m over here?” You asked, taking out the bread, “I think I’ll make a sandwich if you want one.” He didn’t say a word or even acknowledged you, Loki continued to read. You looked closer at what magazine he had, “I didn’t take you for a Cosmopolitan guy.” Still nothing. “I’d think you’d be more of a TIME magazine type.”

“I wouldn’t be reading this garbage if this prison had a decent library,” Loki snapped, “or even an actual book or two.”

“Oh.” Don’t pay attention to his attitude, play nice. “What do you like to read?” Good, small talk, that’s a start.

Loki scoffed, “As if you actually care. Did my brother put you up to this?”

You inhaled to try and keep your cool, as Loki was making this difficult yet again, “You don’t have to be skeptical whenever someone is trying to be nice to you.”

“You call mockery kindness?” He tossed the magazine on the coffee table before standing up, finally facing you, “You have a hilarious sense of humor for whatever game you’re trying to play.”

“What are talking about?” You question with folded arms.

“Don’t act so daft. One moment you act like an innocent creature, then the next you-” Loki paused, meeting your eyes with his. You could see rage building behind them, and something else? Could it be sorrow? No, it couldn’t be. Yet again, you don’t know his full story. But you do know that he was about to call you something nasty.

“Next I what? Act like a total bitch because you’re acting like a bratty kid complaining about their life?” You took a few steps towards him. Loki stood his ground as you approached, only a couple feet away from him. “You could be in a worse situation than this you know. You could be in prison with walls barely taller than you with no magazines or your own time to get food, or even the luxury of having a conversation, even if it’s just me getting pissed off!” You stepped closer until you were face to face with the god. You could see the details of his green eyes that are now filled with distress, his face remaining stoic. The two of you ended up in a staring contest for a few moments, both of you silent which was getting on your nerves even more, “Well? Please, say something!”

Loki opened his mouth as if to speak, when you feel something in the air shift. Not tension, but something you couldn’t explain. Physical? Emotional? Whatever it was, something lifted around the two of you like a heavy weight on your shoulders. Was it all in your head, or did Loki have something to do with it?

Suddenly, a faint sound that you couldn’t tell what it was began to form underneath you. By the look on Loki’s face he heard it too. As the sound grew louder, you both realized the source was coming right beneath not just you, but Loki as well. A ring of what looked like yellow-orange sparks formed at Loki and your’s feet, “Not again.” Was the last thing you heard Loki breathe out before everything went dark and you felt yourself falling through the air.

#spies and gods #spies and gods chapter 7 #chapter 7 #loki x reader #Loki Laufeyson #reader inser #marvel #the avengers #fanfic #fanfiction #my fic #avengers #mcu

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

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Hello lovely people and happy new year! I have a lot of plans for the new year, including being more involved with writing and art on this blog.

What am I planning to do exactly?

For starters I'm planning on writing more fics and making more art that will be uploaded on a schedule at least 1-3 times a week depending on how many stories I'm working on.

As for Spies and Gods and Angelic Intuition I will be writing multiple chapters ahead of time so I can have a chapter prepared for schedule, especially since I'll be starting classes again soon.

Despite me having a schedule for planned fics, requests are opened to send in prompts for one shots and drabbles, which could lead me to turn the prompt into a multi-chapter fic if I get invested in the story.

That's about it for now, I promise I'll have more in store for everyone and remember requests are opened for one shots and drabbles that can fulfill quick fanfic needs. Happy 2k19!

#personal post #long post

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

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Angelic Intuition - Chapter 1

Pairing: Reader x Gabriel (Supernatural)

Chapter: 1/?

Summary: Hunting monsters came easy for you, but encountering an archangel disguising himself as a trickster? You wished you would’ve taken a different case.

Word Count: 489

A/N: This is a fic I started but never got around to work on it more, but I would like to start working on it again soon! But since I’m done with the semester I might have time to finish another chapter. Enjoy!

“And you’re sure it’s a regular stake in the blood of their victim?” You held the phone with your shoulder as you finished packing the trunk of your car. Clothes, laptop, set of knives, a few guns including your shotgun, everything seemed to be stored for the next motel. The hunting life didn’t require a lot of personal items, but it was one of the heaviest jobs to do. Nonetheless, it was a job that needed to be done.

“Yeah, plus they have a huge sweet tooth,” the younger Winchester brother said through the phone, “if you see someone with an excessive amount of candy, it’s probably your trickster.”

When you chucked the last bag and double checked that you had everything ready to go, you slammed the trunk door shut. “Thanks again Sam, tell Dean I said hi.”

“Are you sure you don’t need our help? We’re only a couple hours away-”

“I’m fine, you guys do your thing. I’ll call if you I need backup.” You hung up the phone and entered your car. You appreciated the offer, but this case was something you thought could handle on your own.

The Winchester brothers were great hunters who have been there for you since you began hunting on your own. Your parents knew their dad when you were all kids, occasionally your mom and dad would drop you off at the same motel if your parents worked a case together with John. You didn’t mind Sam, he was mostly quiet and didn’t bother you much. Dean on the other hand, he would tease you by showing off some of his hunting skills. Of course you would always one up him, making him extremely jealous. As you all grew older you had a mutual respect to the older Winchester brother. The visits also stopped once you grew up like many things, only running into them once in a blue moon on a case.

This time you were on your way to a small town that had reports of deaths caused by mythical creatures, and not the normal ones you’ve hunted. One witness said their neighbor was mauled by a ten foot cyclops, another saying a centaur dragged her boyfriend into the woods to never be seen again. To top it off, a homeless man said he saw a dragon burn a man to a crisp. Even though you knew dragons existed, the one he described was like something out of the Hobbit. Every crime scene had one piece of evidence left behind: a candy wrapper. Hours of research only lead to a trickster being the only culprit, being sure that a gang of mythical creatures of that variety was improbable.

You drove off to the small town and checked in to the cheapest motel. On the bed you spread your variety of weapons out to prepare for the hunt. How hard could it be to hunt this trickster down?

#angelic intuition #angelic intuition chapter 1 #chapter 1 #fanfic #fanfiction #reader insert #gabriel #gabriel (supernatural)#reader #gabriel x reader #supernatural #spn

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

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Spies and Gods - Chapter 6

Summary: Living with the Avengers was never part of your plan, but life changes every minute. Having a demigod live in the room across from you was never part of your plan either.

Word Count: 2,746

A/N: This is the last chapter that has been updated on every platform I have posted this story on. I’ll be busy with school for a couple more weeks but hopefully mid/late December the next chapter will be up on my AO3, and then here a few days later. Enjoy and thank you for the support!

Chapter 5 | Chapter 7

Living with the Avengers was never part of your plan. You wanted to meet Tony Stark, find out if he was your biological father, and then head out of town to finally move on with your life. New York didn’t have anything left for you, and you didn’t have anything to offer New York. You had the pleasure of having Maya and Lilly accept you along with Tony letting you stay with the team. But none of it felt right. You didn’t deserve such a luxury, at least that’s what’s been implanted in your head.

When you first told Tony that you were leaving he wouldn’t have it. It was right after Banner revealed the test results.

“So now you’re just gonna leave like that?” Tony asked crossed arm as he watched you pack your bags.

“Just like that. I have to move on.” You barely folded your clothes, basically shoving them into your bag. You didn’t care much for wrinkled clothes, just having them made you feel fortunate. “I don’t have anymore business here. And I’m sure that me leaving will give you less grey hairs than you need.”

Tony rubbed his fingers through his hair, feeling partially insecure by your comment, “Are you going back to live with your friends in Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood?”

“No, but I’m stopping by to say my goodbyes to them. I don’t know where I’m going. Paris always seemed interesting to me, maybe I’ll start there.”

He couldn’t believe what you were saying. You two didn’t know the other existed until you went searching for the truth. And now that you had it you were going to skip town and pretend this never happened. The more you thought about your plan the more you were doubting yourself. But you couldn’t let doubt cloud your mind. Lingering on to the past would slow you down from moving on with whatever life you could live.

“Please, Y/N, just hear me out,” Tony said, “I’m sorry about your mother, and I’m sorry about all the shit you had to go through. And I’m sorry that I wasn’t there to be a-... a father. I want to make it right. I genuinely want to make up for lost time. If you feel like you need to move on, be my guest. But at least stay for a little while to make up for an ounce of the time.”

You hesitated from grabbing any more of your clothes. Did Tony actually want to waste his energy to be your dad? You could finally have a family that you’ve dreamed of being apart of. However, everyone you got close to ended up getting hurt. On the other hand, these were the freaking Avengers. If what Tony said was true, he would know the risk of getting close to you.

“Okay.” You spoke softly, “I’ll stay, but just for a week while I think my plan through. Plus I kinda want to ride in one of the jets.”

Tony smiled, “If you don’t push your luck, maybe you’ll get to fly one.”

A week turned into two weeks, which turned into a month. Your room had more decorations in it than it originally had, making it officially yours. The plan you developed was kept in the back of your head, but was rarely brought up. The rest of the Avengers were fine with Tony’s idea of you moving in, even though you still kept a fair distance away from them. However, your fear of getting too close was overpowered from your inner fangirl wanting to get to know each and every member.

You found yourself talking to Wanda and Natasha the most as well as Vision. The reason being this was probably because they were the only other women other than Pepper in the entire building. With Vision he was always around Wanda since they had a thing together. You weren’t sure how that worked, but who were you to judge.

One day you were having a conversation with Vision and Wanda while they were making dinner. Some sort of Sokovian dish that Wanda had as a child. “Pass me a knife, Vis?” Wanda was putting together a concoction of vegetables that would make a rabbit die and go to heaven. The vegetables along with the aroma of spices in the air made you hungrier by the minute.

“When will dinner be ready? It smells amazing.” You said, sneaking a piece of carrot to snack on.

“Shouldn’t be long. You and Vision can set the table.” The plates and silverware came out of the drawers with a swirling red mist surrounding it from Wanda’s magic. Her powers still baffled yet intrigued you. It was something that looked graceful but could do so much damage.

You and Vision grabbed the plates and began setting the table. While placing the silverware you looked at the gem on his forehead. You were told that the gem was something called an infinity stone and he was created from Thor, Tony, and an evil robot named Ultron. It was a weird combination, but Vision didn’t seem bothered by it.

“So Tony said that he helped create you.” You said, placing the last fork down.

“That is correct. He placed his AI in the cradle that created my body, while Thor’s power brought me to life.” Vision gave a small smile. It wasn’t like he was uncomfortable talking about it, but it was as though he didn’t know how to talk about how he was created.

“And the gem thingy?” You pointed to your forehead.

He grazed over the stone with the lightest touch, “I really don’t know. All I’m aware of is that it is apart of me, and I am apart of it.” His tone turned melancholy, almost embarrassed that he had no clue what was sticking out of his head.

“Since Tony helped create you, I guess that means we’re half siblings.” You smiled, trying to change the topic.

Vision smiled back, even letting out a laugh. “Yes, I suppose we are.”

“Technically I’m the older sister since you’re just a few years old. Literally.” You playfully pushed him on the arm. “So I get to be in charge of you.”

Vision couldn’t help but widen his smile, “Fine, but I can still easily beat you in a fight.”

“I know.”

The doors opened to Bruce jogging in, his expression a mixture of eagerness and worry, “They’re back.”

You followed the others to the main entrance where the rest of the team was greeting the two men you saw the first day you arrived. You recognized Thor immediately as he was wearing his Asgardian suit of metal and dark leather. Completing the look was his signature red cape. All that was missing was his even more signature hammer and long golden locks.

Without realizing it your eyes gazed to the one in green and black sauntering next to his polar opposite. Loki wore a similar garb of Thor, except his was nearly all black and green with accents of gold. You thought he looked better in what he was wearing over his black suit. Where did that thought come from?

You didn’t expect the alien-gods to look so, well, regal. But of course they were princes where they were from. Should you bow out of respect or call them highnesses? They didn’t seem to mind that you didn’t the first day, plus you noticed everyone else was greeting them nonchalantly. But they all already knew each other, since you were new you should probably-

“Hey kid, get a chance to talk to hotshot and not-shot yet?” Your thoughts were interrupted by Tony patting you on the back. His hand remained on your shoulder as he guided you towards Thor and Loki, who were speaking with Steve and Natasha. Thor was doing more of the socializing while Loki stood cross armed as if he were a teenager on a trip he didn’t want to go on. You couldn’t blame him, the first few weeks you avoided everyone as much as you could and thought about abandoning your plan and going back to the apartment. Even now you still felt awkward around the team, especially when you accidentally embarrass yourself in front of your heroes.

Before you knew it you were standing in front of the gods, their attention all on you. You froze with doe eyes as you couldn’t think of what to say. All you could do was stare at the tall men from another world. Thankfully Tony’s quick wits came through.

“I believe you’ve met briefly before, but this is Y/N. My daughter.” This was the first time you heard Tony introduced you publicly as his daughter. You would show your appreciation if you weren’t frozen from the presence of demigods.

Thor’s eyes brighten from the newfound information, “Ah, a pleasure to properly meet you,” he took your hand and lightly pressed his lips to your knuckles, making you blush fiercely you were afraid everyone would notice, “I never knew you had children, Stark.”

“I didn’t know either.” Tony let out a single laugh, obviously confusing Thor, but he smiled along. Loki, on the other hand, remained stoic and unnerved from the conversation. The only thing that changed were his eyes, which were placed on you just like the first day. Again, he was studying you, trying to figure you out with his piercing green eyes. You studied him in return out of the corner of your eye. He stood tall and confident, yet placed himself slightly behind his brother instead of next to. Why?

Your vision moved from his body towards his face. His eyes were relaxed, yet his jaw was clenched. Loki must feel tense in a room full of people who fought (and defeated) him years ago. Moving from the jaw you noticed his cheekbones, sharp and defined. From his cheekbones you followed them to his lips. You couldn’t help but linger your gaze on them. Wait, stop, what the heck are you doing? Your eyes slowly moved to his eyes, not only were they intense, but they held something soft in the vast green irises. You snapped back to reality when you realized you accidentally made eye contact with him, forcing you to jolt your head away as he snapped his gaze elsewhere.

“So, what do you think?” Tony said, his attention changing from Thor to you. You didn’t realize they were talking this entire time.

“What? Sorry I zoned out for a second.” You replied.

“Takes after her father, I swear.” Tony said in a joking tone, “I said after we all eat, you can help me test out some prototypes on a couple of suits.”

Your eyes lit up, but Loki’s stare made you hide your excitement, “Actually, as awesome as that sounds, I might head to bed. It’s been a long day.” You weren’t lying, there were multiple times a day where if you were in a position of a large group setting or you conversed too long you would feel drained. “I promise I can help you tomorrow.”

“Fine, leave the old man to do all the work.” Tony smirked, “Get some rest, kiddo.”

“Again, it was a pleasure to meet you, daughter of Stark.” Thor grinned ear to ear.

You turned around and waved goodnight to everyone, when suddenly you found your eyes locked with Loki’s once again. This time, you swore you saw a small smile form from his lips.

You dried your hair as you put on your pajamas after slipping out of the large bathtub. The tub was your favorite thing in the facility, since the apartment didn’t have one and you grew up without the luxury. You slipped on some slippers and brushed your hair free of tangles. Reaching for the toothbrush and turning on the faucet, you heard the sound of two men outside of your room bickering. No doubt one of the men was Tony.

Setting your toothbrush down you made way to the door, opening it to find of course Tony and Steve just outside, but to your surprise Loki was with them as well, “Oh, sorry if we woke you up, Y/N.” Steve said, facing away from a pouting Tony.

“It’s fine, I was just about to go to bed.” Your eyes glanced towards Loki, you really needed to stop doing that, “What are you guys talking about?”

“Nothing, just a little argument from mommy and daddy.” Tony said in annoyance, clearly he was losing the fight.

“Tony doesn’t want to put Loki in the room across from yours.” Steve stated, “He’s afraid he might do something to you.”

“I’m not afraid, I know she can kick his ass,” Tony glared at the black haired demigod, who just stood there squinting his eyes to Tony, “I don’t like the fact that this psycho will be sleeping twenty feet away from my kid.”

“If you know she can defend herself, then why are you worried?” Steve asked, leaving Tony without a witty comeback for once, “There’s no other rooms, and it’d be a hassle to ask someone else to give up their room and move all of their things.”

Tony’s jaw clenched in aggravation, knowing that Steve was right made him uneasy, so you knew you had to soothe the situation, “Tony, I’ll be okay. It’s no big deal, really. If he tried anything funny, I’ll break his legs.” Loki tilted his head at your comment, almost in a challenging way. Of course you meant it, if he tried anything with you he’d be with two broken legs. Very long, slender legs- Stop. Get that out of your head.

Tony sighed in defeat, “Okay, okay. But I’m putting up extra security throughout the building.” He took a step towards Loki, trying to intimidate him, “For precaution.” Tony then turned around, walking down the hall, probably back to the lab.

As soon as Tony was gone you smiled to Steve and entered your room. As soon as you shut the door you leaned against the wooden material. Tony was right, there was a psycho just twenty feet away. However, that statement could go both ways. What you’ve done didn’t deserve redemption.

You bit your lip, squeezing your eyes tightly to block out the memories. You stood up to finish your nightly routine before plopping down onto the soft bed, wrapping yourself in the warm sheets, and closing your eyes to await for sleep to come.

But sleep didn’t come. All you could think about was your interaction with Loki. Why were you thinking about this? What makes him so special besides the fact that he led an alien war on to New York? And, also that he was technically an alien himself. You couldn’t shake the thoughts until you realized you never even said a “hello” or a “hi”. You shot up from the bed, knowing that sleep won’t be coming for a while until you made your introduction. It had only been an hour since you last saw him and it was still early, hopefully he was still awake.

Stepping into your slippers you stood from your bed. You crossed your room to open your door into the hallway. The next thing you knew you were found face to face with his door, just a few feet from your own. Steadying your breath you knocked on his door. No answer. You knocked once more. Still, no answer. The third time mid-knock the door cracked open to reveal Loki, still in his Asgardian attire. Again, his face stoic and emotionless, barely unfazed from your unexpected visit.

To try and lighten the mood, you put on a smile, “Sorry to bother you, but I didn’t really get a chance to say hi or actually introduce myself. You already know my name- And uh… I already know your name. But I wanted to welcome you to the facility.”

You tried your best to keep your smile while all that changed in Loki’s expression was a raise in an eyebrow. Suddenly he smirked, and it wasn’t your imagination this time. Before you could say anything more the door shut in your face. Now it was just you and the door, once again. You could feel your cheeks burn from embarrassment. Did you say something wrong or upsetting? Maybe he wasn’t the person that appreciated a welcome wagon. This was going to be a lot of work.

#spies and gods #spies and gods chapter 6 #chapter 6 #loki x reader #loki #loki laufeyson #reader insert #mcu #marvel #the avengers #avengers #fanfic #fanfiction #my fic

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

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hey guys, quick update on everything, first i want to say thank you for so much support on Spies and Gods i seriously didn’t expect any of that. but today i had to put my cat down due to his kidneys failing, which you cant do anything about in a cat since their kidneys are so sensitive. he was a good boy who lived to be 15 and was at peace, so we didn’t want him to suffer any longer. i’ll be taking a break from writing and this blog for a little bit, but i have the next chapter of SaG queued for wednesday. hopefully this mourning process won’t be harsh, but there’s no say in when i’ll return as i had to put my other cat down a year ago (due to other health problems we couldn’t reverse as well), but i promise i’ll be back with more SaG and more stories to share with you guys. thank you for understanding.

#personal

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

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Spies and Gods - Chapter 5

Summary: The reader tries to get comfortable in her temporary home, but not without some fights and a question that started it all to be answered.

Word Count: 4,233

Warnings: Fight scene this chapter, nothing too graphic though.

A/N: Thank you everyone for all of the support in this fic! I’m hoping that I’ll post other stories in the future as well as accept requests!

Chapter 4 | Chapter 6

The first week dragged on for what seemed like forever. Most of the time you stayed put in the room you stayed the first night you arrived.

On day one you managed to get your things from the apartment by one of Tony’s men who called himself Happy, or at least that’s what Tony calls him. You thought it was a strange name, but again, you were in a building with superheros. Maya and Lilly were shocked when Happy came into their home unannounced, making Lilly’s instinct to pepper spray him a little reasonable, granted you should have called them first to let them know he was coming over.

Happy came into your room with your two duffel bags full of things and red, puffy eyes. “Woah, what happened to you?”

“Your little friends thought I was a burglar,” he tried to glare at you, dropping the bags on the floor, “they’re lucky I didn’t make them pay for any medical bills.”

“Thanks, for my stuff, anyways.” He nodded, still irritated he walked out.

You went over to your bags and rummaged through them, making sure everything there. Most of the items were clothes since you could never afford to buy useless trinkets. However, you did keep a little snow globe from the zoo that Maya bought for you as a birthday gift along with a stuffed tiger toy from Lilly with a chain necklace around it that engraved “Stay Fierce”. You were grateful for them, but now that the Avengers knew that you use to be Hydra they could be in more danger than they already were. You made a plan that once this was over you would take your things and one of the cars and leave New York, maybe even the country. Starting a new life in a foreign place was all too familiar to you, so you would be fine with it. On the plus side, you knew five other languages so picking a country wouldn’t be too difficult. Getting out of the country was the problem.

As soon as you started thinking about where you could get your passport, you heard a knock on your door. Looking up you saw Natasha Romanoff peek her head in, “Getting settled?” She asked, leaning against the door frame.

You tried to find your words, “Y-Yeah settled are getting bags. I mean, I’m getting my bags settles, wait, no. I mean… Yeah, I am.” Smooth.

Natasha smiled, “I’m Nat, and I know you’re Y/N. I know it’s been tough, especially with what happened with Bucky, but I know what it’s like to be part of something who thinks they’re doing what’s necessary to succeed, but you realize you need to escape.”

“You can relate with that?” You questioned. Natasha’s life was a secret to not only yourself, but for the rest of the team. She was a mystery who fought for good, which is why you admired her so much.

She nodded, “I was just like you. A child who was trained to fight and kill. They did horrible things to me, taught me that I didn’t have a place in the world, but I didn’t believe them.”

You nodded, “I never realized that’s how you became, well, you.” She gave you a look, making you quickly regret what you said, “Not-not like in a bad way or anything, but how tough and bad ass you are. But, you’re also doing the right thing? I don’t know how to put it in words but it just makes sense-”

“It’s okay,” she chimed in, “I understand. I think.” Natasha turned to walk out of the room, but not before looking back at you, “But if you do betray us I won’t hesitate to kill you.” Her tone was serious, but by her wink she was messing with you. Of course she meant every word of it, but only as a way to be protective of her team. You were grateful that she was trying to make you feel better about being here, how you weren’t going to be alone in this journey.

You figured for however long you were going to be here you would try and make friends with the other Avengers, including Bucky. The thought of talking to him again made your stomach tighten anxiously, so you figured you’d try him last and hopefully be nice to him whenever you could.

The first week you secluded yourself to your room, only to emerge to get food. Admitting your past to a group of people drained you, so you figured taking time to yourself and settling the air would be best for everyone. On the start of the second week however, you decided to explore the rest of the facility, but you couldn’t without a chaperone.

“Do you still don’t trust me enough?” You asked Tony, tying your shoelaces.

“It’s nothing personal, just don’t want you getting lost,” he replied, looking at his phone, “be grateful it’s not Happy, he’s not much of a tour guide type. Plus he’s still a bit pissed from your roommate incident.”

You raised an eyebrow, surely you thought it was going to be him. “Who is it then?”

“That would be me.” As if on cue a woman with red hair up in a bun and wore a white business suit stepped next to Tony. You had no idea who she was, but you knew she wasn’t an Avenger.

“Y/N, this is Ms Pepper Potts.” Tony said, placing a hand on Pepper’s shoulder, “She will give you the grand tour of the building.”

“Why? So I don’t snoop around later?” Your gut was telling you that Tony had little faith to let you roam the building alone. Even though your main goal was to gain the trust of the team, Tony was top on your list. Him thinking that you can’t be by yourself outside of your room hurt, but you had to please him somehow.

“Snoop all you like,” he said, “we don’t keep a lot of secrets. At least not easily.”

You nodded, then looked at Pepper, “Okay, I’ll go with her.” If you wanted to gain his trust, maybe going with Pepper willingly without a fight could do that. “And I wasn’t gonna snoop around in the first place.”

“You two are going to get along great.” Tony kissed Pepper on the cheek, “I’ll see you tonight, if you need anything I’ll be in the lab with Banner.”

Tony left you with Pepper, who was typing away at her phone. The two of you were silent while she typed. Not sure what to do, you played with the hem of your shirt until she was done.

“Alright Y/N,” Pepper said, finally breaking the silence, “so we have about two hours before I need to be back in New York for a meeting. So we need to get going so you can see everything.” She smiled and stepped into the hallway, then stepped to the side to allow you through.

You walked next to her down the hallway, her heels clicking against the hard floor. She was walking briskly, forcing you to take quicker steps to keep up with her. The walk was silent, so you thought if you got on her good side it would let Tony trust you more.

“So, you and Tony?” You asked, not sure what else to say.

“Oh, yeah. A few years now.” Pepper said, snapping out of her focused demeanor. She held out her left hand that showed off a shiny ring with a large diamond on it, “He actually just proposed last month.”

Your eyes widened at the sight of the ring. You leaned in closer to get a better look, “Well, congratulations for the two of you.” Thinking that Tony found love with someone other than your mother made your heart ache. Your life could have been so much different if your mother stayed that night. She would have woken up in his arms, slowly fall in love, then nine months later you would be born. The three of you could have been a happy family. No Hydra, no secrets, no mysteries. Your life would make sense. Instead, you’re here trying to figure your life out, while your possible father is planning a future with another woman. You didn’t hate Pepper of course. It wasn’t her or Tony’s fault your mother left that night. One way you were going to get your answers so you could finally move on with your life.

The two of you eventually made your way to a large room filled with gym equipment. You figured it was where everyone trained as the room was rather large enough to be a public gym. At the end of the room was a balcony overlooking an arena like area about thirty feet below.

“This is the training room,” Pepper said, walking you down to the balcony, “down there is where everyone spars against each other for practice.”

You peered over the railing and saw two people fighting each other already. The bodies were moving so fast you couldn’t tell who it was at first, but the closer you looked you recognized one of the people was Natasha, who looked like she was fighting Steve. The two were in sync, when one threw a punch the other blocked, the moment the other block they would swiftly attack instantly, forcing the other to block. The cycle repeated again and again, to you it almost looked like a dance performance the way Natasha and Steve moved with each other. Well, more of a violent dance performance. Nonetheless, the two moved in rhythm and responded to each other’s offensive and defensive movements.

At one point Natasha had Steve pinned, but he quickly countered her attacked until they were at a standstill where neither of them could do anything. They shook each other’s hand and left through a door taking the stairs to where you and Pepper were.

“Oh, afternoon Y/N, Pepper.” Steve said as they entered the room. Natasha threw him a towel while wiping herself off with another one. “Showing her around today?”

“Yes, and we were just about to leave. Kind of on a tight schedule, hope you can understand.” Pepper’s tone was friendly yet tense, you could tell she was a busy woman who rarely took breaks.

Steve smiled to you, “I don’t want to keep you delayed, so hopefully we’ll see you at dinner tonight?”

“Only if the rest of the team allows it.” You shrugged, “I don’t think they’re too comfortable on me being here.”

“It’s weird, can’t lie, but they’ll come through.” Natasha noted, leaning against one of the machines, “It’ll take some time. Everyone here has a part of their past they’re not proud of, doesn’t make you any different.” That thought lingered in your head. Everyone had a story of how they became who they are, and most of the team had a bad rep in the past. Tony’s company use to sell weapons, Natasha was a Russian spy, hell even Bucky and Wanda were with Hydra. Bucky didn’t have a say in it, but it’s not like you had a choice either.

Just then, Bucky entered the room with a gym bag over his shoulder. The last person you wanted to see, and you could tell he was thinking the same thing. His mood shifted when he saw you and silently placed his bag down from his shoulder to his hand, eyeing you. “You’re still here.” He stated in a bleak tone.

“Bucky…” Steve warned as you held your tongue. How could he still be bitter, you’ve been avoiding him for days and he still wants to attack you.

“We were just leaving.” Pepper said, trying to settle the atmosphere.

Bucky shifted his bag and tossed it on to a bench, taking out wraps for his hands. Or at least his human hand. He wrapped his palms and knuckles in silence, yet his movements were harsh with each wrap until he spoke, “The sooner, the better.” His eyes glared at you as he finished, grabbing his bag in an attempt to move to another area in the training room.

Without thinking you grabbed a nearby towel and threw it at the back of Bucky’s head. “We’re not done here.” You snapped, almost regretting what you’ve done as he stood there in a stiff posture. The others stood there unsure of what to do. You’ve angered the beast.

Bucky slowly turned and glared at you with dark eyes while he bit his bottom lip in irritation. “And what’s that supposed to prove?” He said in a sarcastic yet hostile tone.

You huffed and glanced at the arena, giving you an idea. If it’s a fight he wants, it’s a fight he gets.

“I’ll make you a deal,” you pointed at the pit, “you and me fight down there. If you win, I’ll pack my bags and leave right now. If I win, I stay and a handwritten apology from you.”

“Y/N, what are you doing?” Natasha questioned with worry in her voice.

Bucky raised an eyebrow, “Fine.” With that he turned away down a flight of stairs, which you assumed was where he was about to get ready for the fight. Now you wondered what you’ve gotten yourself into.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Steve asked as he grabbed your shoulder, “I’m not doubting your skills, but he’s not gonna hold back any punches.”

“I know, that’s why I won’t either.”

“Y/N we don’t have time for this.” Pepper placed her hands on her hips, clearly showing her frustration.

“It won’t take long, I promise.”

“Yeah, because you’ll get yourself some broken bones in two seconds.” Natasha interjected. You couldn’t tell but her concern for you was authentic.

“I know what I’m doing, trust me.” At least that’s what you kept telling yourself.

The next thing you knew you at one end of the arena while Bucky was at the other. You were still in your t-shirt, jeans, and sneakers while Bucky was in his training gear of a long sleeved black shirt, workout pants, and shoes. Usually you would be ready for anything, but in the moment you only thought that you were a bit under dressed. Nonetheless, you were going into a fight, not a party.

Bucky stretched his neck, his muscles tensing as he did so. You’ve fought bigger guys than him, but he was of course the Winter Soldier. He was a trained soldier with a metal arm that could crush bones. You couldn’t let that thought get into your head now. You needed to focus.

Above you heard the crackle of an intercom, “Make it a clean fight, and please don’t kill each other.” You heard Steve say from the observation room that was high above with a large glass window.

Your breath slowly went in, then went out sharply as you took your stance as you were ready to fight. Didn’t matter much when Bucky took several steps towards you, making the first attack with a swing from his metal arm. You ducked out of the way, his fist barely contacting you. When you avoided his punch he threw another with his other hand quickly which caught you off guard, forcing you to stumble backward toward the wall. He followed you to throw another punch, this time you managed to block him with your forearm that opened up the opportunity for you to kick him in the side. The blow pushed him back a couple of feet, but he quickly shrugged it off. You threw another kick, to you unknowingly allowing him to grab your leg bringing the two of you close. By instinct you threw your free leg over his shoulder, then you twisted your hips to make him fall to the ground.

On the ground he managed to grab you with his metal arm to throw you on the ground. He was now pinning you, yet you somehow were able to knee him off. Before you could get away, he grabbed you with his metal arm again, this time holding you tight with his arms. You squirmed under the pressure of the metallic arm, and you tried to free yourself but it was no use. How could you get out of a hold that was artificial? He didn’t have any pressure points on that arm. That’s when you thought to hit not directly on his metal arm, but right next to hit.

You kicked him on the side of his ankle, his grip weakening allowing you to free your arm so you could elbow right after where his metal arm met his shoulder. Bucky grunted as he fully released you. His nerves must be more sensitive there, giving you the advantage. You grabbed the same spot and swept his feet from under him, once again the two of you on the ground. This time you placed as much pressure on that spot as you could while your legs and other hand gripped his other pressure points to keep him down.

“Why do you think I’m the enemy?” You questioned as he tried to break free, “I know I worked with the bad guys, but remember you did too! So you’re at fault as much as I am.”

Bucky refused to meet your eyes, but your words clearly hit him.

“Is this some way of punishing me for it?” You continued, holding down harder, “By exposing me in front of the people who I look up to? Or trying to make me look like scum who enjoyed murdering those children? Believe me, I already feel like shit for that. But it doesn’t mean I’ll let someone at the same level as me make it worse.”

Bucky stopped trying to escape and finally looked at you. You released your grasp and backed away, the two of you sitting on the cool matted ground.

“I’m sorry.” Bucky muttered.

“What?”

“I said I’m sorry. I know exactly how you feel.” Bucky rubbed his hands together while he looked down, “ I still think about everything they’ve made me do. I thought by joining this team I could forget all of that, I even got my best friend back. Every goddamn day I try to redeem myself from the past, like it would somehow fix everything. But then you showed up, and I thought you were going to ruin everything I was trying to build back up.”

You stared at him in disbelief. The Winter Soldier was apologizing to you , a commoner compared to his legendary status. In the time that you knew him during Hydra he wasn’t a man of many words. For him to open up to you must have taken a lot for him to do, and with that you could only give him your respect.

You struggled to stand up from your soon to be bruises but managed to get on your feet. You offered your hand to Bucky, who cautiously grabbed it thinking you were going to go for round two. You helped him up and patted him on the shoulder in a silent thank you.

You and Bucky went back upstairs to the training room where Natasha, Steve, and Pepper were waiting. Steve looked the most relieved out of the three while Natasha couldn’t help but let out a sly smile, however by the way Pepper was pacing she wasn’t too pleased with your stunt. You were expecting a stern talk from her, but to your surprise she kept what she really wanted to say to herself.

Instead, all she said was, “We are way behind schedule now. Let’s get a move on.” Pepper turned on her high heels and was off before you could comprehend what she said.

You stumbled on your feet to follow Pepper as she briskly walked down the hall. You looked back at Bucky who nodded to you. You were dreading to confront the Winter Soldier for days. After what just happened you were relieved, as if the pit that’s been in your stomach finally lifted.

You and Pepper briefly skimmed other rooms before arriving to the labs. Not a singular lab, multiple labs. “Here are the laboratories where we do mostly research and tests for new tech.” Pepper explained as the two of you observed through the windows, “There are a few rooms for a variety of researches, productions, medical, clinical, mechanical, pretty much anything you can think of to help create new devices for missions. The tech is suppose to be for the team, but Tony likes to keep some of his toys to himself.”

You were baffled how many rooms there were just to make gadgets. Even the Hydra base you lived in didn’t have as many rooms for research as the Avengers did. Although you were only aware of two rooms at your base; one was for tests on new weapons, while the other was for tests on the children. Who knew what the other bases held for “research purposes”.

Pepper opened one of the glass doors and the two of you entered the lab. Inside were numerous machines that you had no idea what did what. The only thing you could identify was a microscope, which you were quite proud of for that.

Observing one of the machines was an older man in plaid wearing a lab coat. He looked up and smiled with a toothy grin to Pepper, “Miss Potts! Glad to see you decided to visit,” the man looked to you, “I see you brought a friend.”

“This is Y/N, she’s our guest. Y/N this is doctor Erik Selvig, he’s an astrophysicist.”

“Nice to meet you.” You shook his hand, “Not to sound rude, but why do you guys need and astrophysicist?”

Erik and Pepper looked at each other, “There are some things not from our planet,” Erik chimed in, “like Vision, the gem in his head isn’t from here. Or the attack on New York a few years ago.”

You nodded, “Then I guess we’ll need all the physicists we need.”

“We’ll leave you to your work, Erik.” Pepper walked away before you noticed, making you turn on your heel to catch up with her. You waved goodbye to Erik while you two walked out of the lab.

“So, are we almost done?” You asked when you finally caught up to her.

“There’s one more stop we need to go to.” Pepper and you arrived at the end of the hall. This door was different than the others, instead of glass the doors were a white metal. Pepper pulled out a card and scanned it against a box on the door frame, blinking green as it accepted the card.

She opened the door and the two of you stepped in, the room was vast with a platform in the center and had a second floor with a railing overlooking the rest of the room. On the second floor were computers and, again, more machines you were oblivious to. There were two men in the room that you found were Tony and Banner, Tony was on the platform in front of a hologram chart while Banner was on the second floor.

The moment you and Pepper entered the room the men moved their attention to the two of you, “Glad you could join us. We’re just doing a science project.” Tony waved his hand and the hologram disappeared.

“And by ‘we’ he means himself,” Banner interrupted, “I’m currently working on your DNA test.”

“Anything yet?” You asked as he walked down the stairs.

“Getting somewhere, but it’s not as easy when it’s just one person.” Banner looked at Tony approvingly.

“I have my own homework to work on, I’ll buy you a coffee for all your hard work.” Tony winked, stepping over to Pepper, “Dinner still on after your meetings tonight?”

“Hopefully, as long as Y/N’s performance didn’t set my schedule back.” Pepper snided.

Tony looked at you bemused, “What did you do?”

You rubbed your heel against the floor, avoiding eye contact with them, “I kind of, sort of, got into a fist fight with Bucky.” You mumbled.

Tony’s eyes grew wide while Banner poked his head up from behind the computer, “You did what?” Banner asked.

“We figured everything out, it’s no big deal.”

Tony didn’t say anything, his hand was covering his mouth while his eyes stared at you. You didn’t know what was going on in his head. Maybe this was how you’ll end up being kicked out.

“Did you win?” He eventually asked.

“Tony!” Pepper exclaimed in disapproval.

“It was sort of a tie, but I did.”

Tony raised an eyebrow in surprisement, nodding his head in acceptance, “Good. If you turn out to be a Stark, you have to know that we don’t take kindness to losing.” He chuckled, giving you his signature Tony Stark side smirk. Then he looked at Pepper glaring at him, “But that was very stupid, and you shouldn’t be picking fights to prove a point.” His voice was serious but he winked at you, knowing that everything was going to be okay and you wouldn’t get in trouble.

“Speaking of being a Stark…” Banner held up a tablet emitting a hologram, “Congrats kid, you have quite a few years of child support coming your way.”

#spies and gods #chapter 5 #spies and gods chapter 5 #loki x reader #loki #reader insert #mcu #marvel #the avengers #fanfic #fanfiction #my fic

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

Note

I love your story “Spies and Gods”!!! It’s amazing and i’m so excited for the next chapter!

Thank you so much!

#answered ask #jcatalinacordova

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sighingstarbeam · 5 years

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Spies and Gods - Chapter 4

Summary: The reader tells her side of the story to the Avengers of her time in Hydra.

Word Count: 4,219

Warnings: Depictions of harming children and other graphic content. Please read at your own risk.

A/N: This is one of the chapters where it gets dark. There’s no promise that I won’t post another chapter equally or more dark as this one, but it won’t happen for quite a while.

Chapter 3 | Chapter 5

Bucky snarled his last words, suddenly everyone’s attention was on you. You looked around and saw glaring eyes, everyone except for Tony. His eyes showed confusion and betrayal. So much for that bonding moment. And it was all thanks to the Winter Soldier, the man you thought was left for dead, here and well alive.

You looked back to Bucky, his posture in the attack mode you knew too well. You didn’t want to make the situation worse, “I can explain-” Before you could say another word Bucky was on you, forcing you into a nearby wall. His metal hand reached your throat, keeping you in place. His fingers squeezed around your neck, not enough where you couldn’t breathe but enough where there will definitely be a bruise tomorrow. If you lived to see tomorrow.

Fear began to consume you as his hand slowly closed around your throat, your airway little by little closing. Out of the corner of your eyes you could see everyone jump from their spots in defense and surrounded you and Bucky.

Before anyone could act any further Tony grabbed Bucky’s shoulder harshly. “That’s enough!” Tony yelled. His hand suddenly squeezed tighter from Tony’s touch, making you grunt from the pain. “Let her explain herself. We don’t know the full story.”

“You don’t, but I do,” Bucky interrupted with his face still snarled, “she’s an agent of Hydra. One of the top children spies. You can’t trust her.”

Tony turned to you, his eyes began to fill with sorrow, “Tell me he’s lying.” He said softly to you.

Your heart sank as he spoke those words. You hesitated, trying to hold back tears. You couldn’t cry, you can’t cry, “It’s true.”

You could see where Tony’s heart broke the moment your words slipped your mouth. He rubbed his beard and walked away, then placed his hands on his hips as he thought. It broke your own heart seeing him feel betrayed. The two of you didn’t see eye to eye at first, however throughout yesterday you thought that even if the results were negative that you could remain friendly towards each other. But now you had doubts about everything.

Without turning, Tony said, “Was everything a lie?”

“N-No,” you choked out through Bucky’s grip, “I didn’t tell you everything, but what I said yesterday was mostly true.”

“Mostly?” Tony snapped turning towards you.

“I wasn’t lying that Aubrey Y/L/N is my mother, but I wasn’t put in foster care.” You grabbed Bucky’s cold, metal hand with yours as you tried to weaken the grip, which was practically pointless, “If you would just let go I’ll explain everything. Please. I never wanted to be in Hydra.”

Your eyes were pleading, which might’ve gotten to Tony as he said, “Bucky, put her down.”

Bucky’s head turned abruptly towards Tony, “There’s no way you can trust her-”

“I don’t.” His words hit you like a knife. And to think you two were starting to warm up to each other. “But I want to hear her side.”

Bucky released his grip on your throat. You gasped for air and coughed trying to catch your breath. Shakily, you stood up and held yourself again the wall for support until you could stand on your own. At this point everyone was interested to hear your story, but they were still prepared to attack if necessary. “I was with Hydra most of my life,” you began, “up until a few years ago when the aliens attacked. The building I was held in at one point was completely demolished. There were no survivors, except me. I managed to dig my way out, get new clothes, pick a name for myself, and go from there. The things they did to me… make me do… I wanted to kill them all. Make them pay for what they did to me and the other kids.”

“There were other kids?” Bruce inquired, you nodded.

“Hold up, how long were you with them?” Sam asked.

You shook your head, “Ever since I was born.” Tony’s eyes looked at you, realizing why your mother left him all those years ago.

“What exactly happened while you were there?” Steve asked.

“That’s… a longer story.”

Your first memories were you holding a gun. They weren’t loaded of course, but it was just to make you get use to the weight and feel of carrying one.

As you grew older, the guns grew larger and you were given different weapons. Your favorite was a butterfly knife, watching the adults train with it with grace and ease was mesmerizing. Unfortunately you weren’t allowed to use one until your hands grew large enough to hold it in one. When that time came you practised everyday, but at a price. You’d cut your fingers every so often, and everytime you did you were punished. They wouldn’t let you quit either. He wouldn’t let you quit.

One morning during training, you met a boy, a little bit older than you, but he was about your size. You learned his name was Marcus and he was transferred from another facility. The two of you quickly became friends and did almost everything together. You both trained together, had meals together, and eventually shared a room after your roommate was relocated. You couldn’t explain it at the time, but the way he made you feel was unlike anyone else. He made you smile, laugh, comforted you when you cried in secret, and made sure you ate on days when you were sick. He was also respected by the other children with his generosities. You could say he was your first crush, but you weren’t allowed to have crushes. Not because they told you, but because you knew people you cared about didn’t last long.

When you were about thirteen years old, you stumbled upon Marcus talking to some other boys. They were younger than you two were, and didn’t have the look as everyone else did who have lived here for years. Their eyes were full of life and hope, haven’t yet been tainted by the wrath of Hydra. However you couldn’t complain, you weren’t allowed to complain, but Hydra was home.

“Hey Marcus,” he jumped and quickly turned to you, “what’re you guys talking about?”

“Nothing.” He blurted. You could tell when he was lying, but he wasn’t a great liar to begin with. “I was just telling them a story.”

You raised an eyebrow, “A story? Didn’t know you could tell stories. You know what the Officer would say about make believe.”

“Not those type of stories,” he said, shooing the other kids away, “my mission stories. I just had my first mission a few days ago.”

Your eyes widened, “Why didn’t you tell me? Are they already letting us go on missions?”

“No, not everyone. They needed me for a special mission. I’ll tell you about it later, but I need to tell you something else. Meet me in the bathrooms after dinner.” With that he turned and walked the other way. You’ve never seen him act so strangely before, and special missions? They don’t allow the children to go on any missions until they were at least sixteen. Something was going on, but you guessed you were going to find out after dinner.

You sat on the metal bench, food that you’ve grown accustomed to on the tray in front of you. A plate full of chicken, broccoli, beans, and a glass of water and milk was a regular meal for everyone to keep the protein high for training. You couldn’t take a bite of a single thing, your mind was only on Marcus and what he wanted to talk about. You scanned around the cafeteria in hope that Marcus would join you, but all you could see was a room full of children in the same grey uniform. You waited for the entire dinner period, but he never showed. The speaker came on to tell everyone dinner was over and to go to your next station. You quickly scarfed down the rest of your meal, knowing if you were caught with food on your plate you would be punished. As everyone cleared the room, you made your way to the bathrooms. Usually you would be on your way to your self defense station training, but you didn’t want to wait any longer with what Marcus wanted to say.

You entered the sleek bathroom, rows of toilet stalls and sinks lined the walls until the end of the room were the showers. You walked slowly down the aisle until you looked at yourself in the mirror. You never looked at yourself, you would only glance once in a while. You studied your features, your eyes sunken from the training and how tired you were, the small scars from the weapons you practised with, but you could tell you were growing up. So much has changed within you the last few years, but you’re always too busy to notice.

“Over here.” You jumped as you heard a whisper, only to see it was Marcus hiding in the showers.

“Marcus, what’s going on? You’ve been acting weirder than usual.”

“You’re my best friend, right? So I can tell you anything?” He said in a hurry, almost like he needed to be somewhere else.

“Of course, and you’re my best friend. Which means you need to tell me what’s up.”

“I’m leaving, tonight.” Your heart stopped. This had to be a joke, right? Nobody just leaves Hydra without punishment to be paid.

“W-What are you talking about? You can’t leave! The Officer will have your neck if you did.” Your eyes began to tear up, and since it was just the two of you they flowed with ease.

“I don’t have much time. I’ve been smuggling children out for a few weeks now. The boys I was talking to today are leaving tonight and they’re waiting for me.”

You were confused, angry, devastated, your stomach began to twist on itself, making you want to throw up. Marcus saw your frustration and held your shoulders, pulling you into a hug. You allowed him to hug you, but you didn’t hug him back for a while. When you finally did you began to bawl, “How could you betray us like that? Betray me?”

“That’s why I wanted to ask you if you wanted to leave with me.” You looked up at him and pushed him away. “We could leave all of this behind. No more training, no more rules, no more orders. We can finally be free.”

“How have you been smuggling the others out?” You asked through tears.

“There’s a blind spot from the security cameras outside. I’ve managed to get the fence loose without anyone noticing. A couple miles out there’s an abandoned shed. There are others waiting for me there right now, and tonight when I leave we’re all leaving together, to tell the world the cruelties of Hydra.”

You were speechless. Those missions he’s been going on was him smuggling children out. Now he was going to smuggle one last group before he left for good. Your head was spinning, you couldn’t think of anything.

“I need an answer now.” He held your hands, looking you in the eyes.

“I…” you whispered, “I can’t, I can’t leave Hydra. I don’t want to get punished.”

“They won’t punish you anymore if we leave, together.”

Your eyes dropped to the floor, you stepped away from him, “I’m sorry. I am bounded to Hydra.”

Marcus sighed, his posture dropped as he ran his hand through his hair, “I guess this is goodbye then.” Before you knew it he leaned in and kissed you. His lips lingered for a moment before he pulled away, then he left you alone in the bathroom. You sat on your knees as you began to sob. You didn’t know whether the decision you made would be your biggest mistake ever.

You exited the bathroom nearly an hour later, running into a familiar face. His stance was tall and intimidating, you couldn't miss him anywhere, “Officer Kilcher ,” You clicked your heels together, “hail Hydra.” Officer Kilcher ran the entire facility, overseeing each and every child who lived here.

“At ease.” He responded, another man accompanied him. His intense stare made you shiver, as well as his metal left arm. “Why are you not at training?”

“I had cramps, Officer.” You couldn’t think of anything else, you haven’t even had your period yet but the other girls who did said they had intense pain in the abdomen which got them out of training for the day. “I wasn’t feeling well.”

Officer Kilcher was silent for a moment, “Go to the infirmary. Then I want you back in training extra early tomorrow.” The other man’s eyes were on you, still intense.

“Yes, sir.” You walked in the opposite direction of them, until Kilcher called you.

“The infirmary is the other way, dear.” You turned and looked at him, you swore red was filling your entire face. You nodded and briskly walked in that direction. The moment you turned the corner out of sight you began to run to your room. As you suspected, Marcus wasn’t there, and neither were the little of belongings he had. You curled up on your bed, tears streaming down once again as you cried yourself to sleep.

You awoke to the speakers blaring, ordering all children to the courtyard immediately. You sat up on your bed, from the window you could tell it was very early, the sun not out but the light of morning was visible. You rose from the bed and followed the rest of the children outside to a large field of concrete. You all stood in your designated sections in neat rows, you being third from the front somewhere in the middle. There were rare occasions where everyone was outside, making you wonder what was going on.

Officer Kilcher stepped in front of everyone, the same metal armed man from last night next to him, making everyone fall dead silent. Everyone clicked their heels in position, “Hail Hydra!”

“It has come to my attention that we have been missing a few of our comrades the last few days,” Kilcher began, “and I’m sure some of you have noticed it as well.” You could feel his eyes on you, but you stared straight ahead as you listened. “You all know that breaking rules result in punishment, but there is one unspoken rule everyone should already know that is an exception.” He lifted his hand and curled his fingers, commanding other men to bring out people with bags over their heads and their hands tied behind their back. The men brought them to their knees, removing their bags. Your breathing stopped when you saw it was Marcus and the boys he was suppose to help escape last night. The boys were crying, their faces bruised, but Marcus looked the worst. His eyes were completely swollen, dried blood stained his nose, and bruises were all over his neck and face. Your stomach twisted in knots at the sight of him. “These children,” Kilcher continued, pointing at them, “thought they could leave us. Their only home. And now they must set an example for the rest of you.”

Kilcher nodded his head to the metal armed man, and he immediately left his side, coming right at you. He grabbed your arm with his regular hand and dragged you to the front, right in front of Officer Kilcher.

Kilcher reached in his back pocket and held out a silver pistol, grabbing your hand to meet with the gun. You could feel your hand shaking as the metal touched your skin. Kilcher grabbed the back of your neck and dragged you to face Marcus, his eyes looking down. “The exception to trying to leave doesn’t result in punishment,” he announced, “it will result in an execution.” Your breath hitched, everything began to look dizzy, but you forced yourself to stand. Kilcher turned to you and placed his arms on your shoulder, one of his hands gliding your arm to hold the gun to Marcus’ head. “You know the rules, dear. You must be the one. He was your room companion, you should have known what he was doing.”

“I-I didn’t know anything about it.” You whispered, holding back tears.

“Either way, you must be the one to do it. If you don’t, I will kill both of you personally.” Kilcher tightened his grip on you as you pointed the gun at Marcus. His eyes finally looked up to meet with yours, you could read from his glossy eyes that he was trying to say everything was okay. You squeezed your eyes shut, but Kilcher shook you, “No. You must watch this.”

You let out a shaky breath, looking into Marcus’ eyes one last time before you pulled the trigger. A moment after the gun fired you heard more shots, one for each of the boys. You couldn’t hold back your tears any longer, you collapsed to the ground next to Marcus’ body as you wept.

Kilcher left your side and faced the other children, their faces still. “Let it be known if anymore of you try to escape, this will be your fate. Hail Hydra.”

“Hail Hydra!” The other children yelled, then they all left in formation inside.

Kilcher stepped towards you, holding your chin to force you to look at him “What have I told you about crying?” He asked sternly.

“Anyone who would cry…” you choked out, “would be severely punished.”

Kilcher snapped his fingers and two guards came to your side and forced you on your feet, “Take her to solitary confinement. That shall be her new room. Take her to the barber as well, let them know to give her the ‘treatment’.” He looked at you once more and smiled, “This shall be your new job now. We know about the others he has smuggled and we intend to find each and everyone of them. It will be your job to execute each one.”

Your knees began to wobble, but the guards kept you up. They escorted you away, first to the barber, where he shaved your head all the way to the skin. Next was solitary confinement, where it was a small six by six room with a single bed and poor excuse of a toilet.

Ten. That was the number of children you had to execute, including Marcus, that Hydra could find. At thirteen you were already a killer. Every time you shot someone you cried, and every time you cried you were tortured and forced to train for several hours extra. Your meals were cut in half, and then cut in half again. You awaited for the day that they were done with you and put a bullet through your head.

There was a night where you were so malnourished you fainted and sent to the infirmary. One of the nurses had your entire medical history in a folder. There was an emergency and she quickly left to help, leaving the folder on the counter. Curious, you weakly stood as you grabbed the file. You flipped through a few pages until you found something that caught your eye. You read one of the pages that read: MOTHER - Aubrey Taylor Y/L/N, FATHER - UNKNOWN. You scanned the rest of the paper, trying to find answers to who your parents were. All you could find about your mother was she was a Hydra agent, and a good one as her ranking and status were high. There was nothing about your father, until you flipped the page and found something on the back. POSSIBLE FATHER: Anthony Edward Stark. Knowing that you had parents that were possibly out there, it was your only mission in life to find them. You needed to know that they existed, that they weren’t just some words on a page.

Several years went by, the same routine would happen anytime someone tried to escape. You grew numb to this, your tears eventually dried where you could no longer cry. You felt nothing, because you knew you were nothing but an executioner for Hydra.

You were able to gain the trust of Officer Kilcher to become his right hand woman, the metal armed man left weeks after your first kill. There were occasions where you would travel with Kilcher to other Hydra bases. One year, the two of you went to New York for a conference. The meeting was held in a building deep in the city on the first floor. You waited in the lobby by the entrance, this was the first time you had seen so many people who weren’t involved in Hydra. You secretly envied them, wishing you could be among them.

Apparently something heard your wish, as you felt the ground start rumble, everyone screamed and ran in the streets. You peered out the window and couldn’t believe your eyes. Creatures were falling from the sky, shooting buildings with the hovercrafts they were flying in. The building quaked as one of the creatures shot the structure, the ceiling began to fall in crumbles.

You were only out for a moment, you tried to reorient yourself as to what was happening. The aliens coming down, the building falling, you now noticed you were trapped. Your eyes shifted around, you could see light and you could feel your hand feel the air. You must’ve been close to the outside. With your free hand you began to dig, carefully moving each chunk of rubble as to not let any more collapse on you. It felt like hours until you were finally able to shift yourself out.

You looked back to see the damage. The entire building was completely collapsed. The room Officer Kilcher was in was in the center, there would be no way he survived. There would be no way he survived.

You were free. For the first time in years, you felt happiness.

“I ran as fast and far away as I could get away from the building.” You said, “After everything was done the news said there were no survivors in the building. That’s when I learned about you guys and how you saved the world that day.”

Everyone was silent by the end of the story. They were all thinking how they could make a little girl do horrible things, but they knew Hydra didn’t feel remorse, only power. You looked at everyone, all with the same, solemn expression. Everyone except Bucky, who kept the same stoic face you remember from all those years ago.

“How do you know Hydra isn’t still looking for you?” Bucky asked.

“About a year or two after I escaped, I was in the mall. There were two Hydra agents that I worked with almost every single damn day.” You looked down remembering them, “I recognized them immediately, they even looked me directly in the eye. They were just feet away, and you know what they did? Nothing. Walked right by me without a word. Do you think Hydra agents would do just let me go after everything I’ve done?”

Bucky was silent, his face confused but fell stoic once again. You crossed your arms, holding them tight against your chest. The silence was killing you, but you didn’t dare say anything until one of them spoke first.

“So what’s the plan now?” Rhodey asked.

“Plan? There is no plan.” Tony retorted, still a bit betrayed.

“Miss Y/N, could you give us a moment while we discussed this?” Steve said kindly, you could tell he felt sympathy for you. That’s not what you wanted, but you appreciated that he was calm about this.

You nodded and stepped outside, you sat down on the ground back against the wall as you tried to listen in. You only heard murmurs, no yelling, no arguments, then there was silence, followed by more murmurs.

Nearly half an hour passed until Tony stepped out and joined you on the ground. You didn’t look up at him but he was looking right at you. “Can you fight?”

You furrowed your eyebrows and looked at him, “What?”

“I said, can you fight?” He repeated.

“Yes. Hydra trained me to fight in all sorts of ways.”

Tony nodded, “If you can prove you’re worthy to the team, we’ll let you stay.”

Your eyes lit up but you grew confused, “You’re letting me stay? After all of that?”

“We don’t want you roaming out there before the test results come in,” he said, “so you’re staying here, with us, until then. After that we’ll go from there.”

Suddenly, you hugged Tony as tight as you could. He was surprised from the gesture he nearly fell over, but patted your shoulder as he regained his balance. “Thank you. I thought you were gonna kick me out or kill me.”

“I won’t. But Bucky is still a bit skeptical, you better convince him before he changes his mind.”

The two of you stood up and reentered the room. Everyone seemed to be at ease with you this time, except for Bucky, who was leaning against the kitchen counter. This was going to be a fun few weeks.

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