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springsmile · 7 hours
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UPDATE — OVER MY SHOULDER
ITS IN THE WORKS EVERYONEITS IN THE WORKS. IM WRITING. IS IT GOOD? IDK. IS IT HAPPENINY? YES.
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springsmile · 5 months
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i am trying desperately to get back into the groove of my usual writing style . it’s proving to be useless though1- brain is heavy under stimulated and exhaustion is taking over !!!!!!!!!!!! aghhhh!!!!!!!!! writers block , ig??? anyway,
i’m trying to finish the second chapter of over my shoulder ! i want it to come out perfect more than anything but , i might just have to make do.
work sucks and i hate living!!! bye!!!
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springsmile · 6 months
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infiltration.
descr: you think you’re slick, you think you have albedo playing into your hands. (nsfw)
warnings: obsessive behavior, manipulation, light smut, bondage, dubcon.
wc: 2.4k
[albedo x fem reader]
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springsmile · 6 months
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the way it is.
[k. bakugo x gn reader]
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18+
descr: a suicide attempt sends your captor reeling, and your mind deteriorates in isolation.
warnings: depression, kidnapping, suicide attempt, self-harm, abuse, dehumanization.
wc: 1.5k (tentative lmfao i don’t know)
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There was fluid trapped in your sinuses.
Specifically, between your eyebrows and above your nose. It was sore, and tender to the touch. If you pressed on it hard enough, you could forget the humming in your ears and the iciness of the concrete beneath you, but the tantalizing fact would remain: you're shackled to the floor.
He'd put you there because you're... unmanageable. Unworthy of his time, unworthy to be dealt with. You're not important things, an important thing. You weren't even sure you were a thing at all. You felt like nothing. Besides a warm and wet hole to use and love until it broke, you were sure your existence was nothing more than abysmal.
Your last meal was 7 nail bites ago. You'd hit the tender skin underneath. Your eyes had long adjusted to the absence of light. 
The heavy iron door creaks open, and you're met with his temperamental stare and gritted sharp teeth. You hand slithered to your neck, you'd had lingering marks from those canines.
"Are you ready to apologize?" He asks gruffly, and you wonder what happened to the rage that festered in your heart. Had it dissipated? You would've given it to him a few days ago, maybe even yesterday, but white noise has enveloped all sense and thought, and left you a portrait of inadequacy.
"I'm sorry." It's remorseless, and there's no tone. It wouldn't satisfy him. Bakugo loved nothing more than the sound of his own voice, and that of your begging.
"No, give me a real fuckin' apology." His footfalls reverberate through the concrete your ear is pressed up against, and ordinarily, you'd find that intimidating. Your joints would've gone rigid and you'd desperately reach deep within yourself to discard your dignity and beg, plea not to be beaten, but the switch was off and there was nothing but the white noise. You saw circular scribbles on the backs of your eyelids.
"I'm sorry." You repeat, no alterations added. It couldn't have been made even if you tried. There was no substance, no emotion left to grapple onto and inject into your empty words.
"Fuck, Y/n." He curses, dropping to his knees at your side. You don't want him to touch you, but much like everything else in this decrepit nightmarish reality, you didn't have control over what happened to you anymore.
His hand comes to thread itself in your hair, and he gives your scalp gentle scratches. You feel like a flea-infested dog at the pound, waiting to be euthanized. Your eyes trail over the marks on your arms, the deep lines in the dirt, waiting for the seeds of satisfaction to be planted and harvested. You smile, taking the sharp side of your nail and dragging it across the rows.
"I don't want to keep you down here. At all. It's not up to me right now, though. Just fucking apologize, and we can go back upstairs." He reasons searching in your eyes for a semblance of life, a trace of existence. "It's all up to you, Y/n."
You sigh, eyes leaden and thick with lethargy. "If I give you want you want, I'll be nothing forever."
The twitch of his eye isn't audible, but the disgruntled sound in the back of his throat was. "What the fuck are you talking about?" 
Your eyes roll to your hands--they're filthy. Just like the rest of you. Laying in your filth, your mess, whatever was left of your worth. Your nails are trimmed, it's deliberate. Wedged beneath the surface is grime and snot and muck; you contemplate ingesting it, maybe there's some intestine-destroying bacteria, maybe you'd get sick and maybe he'd care. 
"I'm sorry," you say, mouth full of sand and bitterness, "I'm sorry, I hurt myself before you could."
"I don't fucking..." he stops, and he's on your level now. It's a little unsettling. He takes you into his arms, carefully, handling you like porcelain, and lays your head in his shoulder despite your state of vulgarity. "Look, I just... I don't want to do this. I don't hurt you on purpose, but you don't learn. You have to learn, Y/n. This is the way it is." 
You don’t have the energy to glare, to be upset, to argue to do fucking anything but lay there in his arms though it sickened you and accept that your efforts were unparalleled. Katsuki was never charming, was never compassionate, not until it came down to the pinnacle of your suffering—and what that meant? You didn’t know. Your deathbed, maybe? Maybe if you’d cut deeper, he’d cried.
“Why don’t you care?” You found yourself asking.
His eyes could’ve been on you, on the blood on your arms and your tender inner thighs, or they could’ve been contemplative and remorseful. You don’t want to look at him anymore.
“You think I don’t care?” His voice is clipped and strained, you almost thought he sounded hurt. That’d be hilarious, wouldn’t it?
“I know you don’t care. That’s why you left me down here with inch long cuts in my arms and laying in my own fucking piss.”
Katsuki’s quivering, and you’re not sure whether to chalk it up to anger, upset, or pain. “What was I supposed to do, Y/n? You tried to fucking leave me, I’m pissed. You don’t know your place, you just—you don’t understand. It could’ve been worse.”
“What’s worse than being kidnapped, raped, and beaten half an inch to death?”
“Could you stop? Fuck’s sake…”
He carries you up the stairs with his effortless strength, the same that had been extended to your bones and eye-sockets. The floorboards echo with a familiar hollowness, and resonate with the husk of you, and the flickering mirage of the past.
Despite being well-acquainted with the sole place you’d inhabited for well over five months, after spending a few weeks(?) in that basement, your eyes happened upon minute details and decidedly insignificant idiosyncrasies in the walls and in Bakugo. Katsuki. Depended on the day.
The resistance had wavered, and so did your desire. You’re already nude, and set down in the bathtub gingerly—it’s eggshell white, and there’s a plethora of pubes gathered around the drain. The carpet matches the drapes, huh?
You lift your arms to the dull, bleak light overhead, observing the damage. And you smiled.
“What the hell are you grinning for?” He demands, and you’re unable to discern whether he’s concerned or appalled.
“This is the deepest I’ve ever cut, and it still wasn’t enough to get away from you.” You said emptily, dropping your arms. They ripple the surface with a soft plop. Katsuki shudders as the water smacks his face, and he’s hanging his head in resignation…unrelenting… You could only sense rage, that’s all you ever thought of Katsuki, that he was always pissed and always eager to rough you up if you didn’t listen well enough.
“Am I that horrible? You’d rather die than be with me? Huh?” His voice rises with each syllable. Your eyes roll to the side, watching his countenance crumble, and fuck, it made you happy. “I protect you, I love you, I fucking feed you— you have no damn reason to be miserable, let alone depressed—“
“I’m done, Katsuki. I have nothing left. You took it all. Kill me naked, kill me right now. I don’t care anymore.”
His eyes are shrouded, the snarl on his lips plain as day. “I won’t let you. I… I can fix this. I can fix you. I do care. I love you for God’s sake.”
Your laugh is grey, and it makes his gut wrench. Sickly and pale and spiritless. He’d done this. If he could, Katsuki would’ve done it differently. He would’ve wooed you traditionally, in a way he knew you would’ve liked, accepted, and you’d never turn to a razor blade, you’d never lose your color and your touch. It’d been too long since he’d been blessed by the rays of your smile and your harmonious breath, he couldn’t remember them anymore. He couldn’t remember you.
Katsuki has to accept that this was the way it is now.
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springsmile · 6 months
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attention <3
[t. oikawa x reader]
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18+
descr: his pretty little housewife hasn’t been paying attention :(
cw: disassociation , noncon, smut, overstim (?)
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the burn on your arm is slight— it stings, it's a furious dark pink, but you're not worried about it like you're worried about when your next menstruation will begin; if it will begin.
you've become exceedingly absentminded. vision goes fuzzy inadvertently, while handling the oven (hence the burn) or during toru's lovemaking. you don't remember who you are, where you are, or who you're with, much to your chagrin, and he's yet to catch on.
your disassociation is masked by compliance and obedience. you appear to be giving in, appear to enjoy your new housewife role, and content in imprisonment. the disassociation is highly advantageous in the bedroom, when toru's hands grip your hips too tightly, leaving black and blue in their midst. when he's rasping into your ear, insisting you're his possession, you're his sweet slut. and with words sharp and crass, his hands do the opposite: intrude the soft and velvety warm of your cunt, the heat sopping, pulsating with each knuckle-deep thrust of his digits, masterfully curling to kiss that spot, the one that makes you throw your head back and scream in ecstasy.
he touches you sweetly, and insults you to filth with his tongue. it's around then the fog clears, and it's around then you know exactly who's cock is lining up with your entrance.
"say my name." he's whispering, hips snapping forward with vigor. you're still embracing the veil over your sight, shrouding your senses and the better of yourself.
“hmm... what?" you murmur in reply, and his thrusting yields, a callous hand gripping your face with little gingerness. the murk of his eyes become less opaque, and your stomach begins to knot.
“what’s the point of fucking you if you’re not even gonna pay attention?” he tuts, where you’d expect frustration, toru was vexed. he sighs, thick and heavy, before his hands come to the intersection of your legs and push forward, pressing your thighs against your chest. “that’s okay, we’ll redirect your focus.”
now he’s impossibly deep, forehead pressed to yours, eyes searching yours. your mouth drops open, and everything becomes narrowed, you’re honed in on everything.
whimpers and whines drool from your mouth, soon occupied, and it’s too much. too fucking much.
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springsmile · 6 months
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removing the cancer
18+ | t. kuroo
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descr: (how yandere kuroo deals with your overbearing mother) years of abuse from your overbearing, cancerous mother has transformed you into a feeble version of yourself & kuroo decides to take action.
warnings: parental death, murder, body shaming, emotional neglect from parent, kidnapping, mentions of suicide and self harm. (none of which is explicit or graphic, besides body shaming/neglect.)
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how many times had he plucked you from your ball on the ground, a heap of tears, racked by waves of hysteria and betrayal, and cradled you back to security? had he kissed you, reaffirmed everything you needed to hear, and begged you not to return home?
its becoming clearer and clearer to kuroo that it’s not a matter of when but how.
how would he uncoil the roots of a possessive mother’s hold, tightening around your neck and yielding all oxygen flow, all room for movement and thought and choices? once he eliminated the cancer, then he could consider how to inject himself into your line of vision, of decision, of every thought and worry under the sun. when would you worry about what to make for dinner, and if kuroo was coming home late that day?
even now you’re panicked, teary eyed because you’re late to the family function, some crude fucking dinner with white claws leaving lightened rings on the polished wood tables, corn hole being set up on the opposing sides of the living area, and the incessant chatter and one-upping that he could tolerate, but he knew you couldn’t stomach.
“this is gonna be a shit show.” he’d huffed, inspecting your features closely from the corner of his eye. you’re the absolute opposite of elated, in its most extreme form. would that be dread? you’re dreading seeing your family, being trapped with them for an extended period of time. kuroo reaches for your hand.
“hey, it’s gonna be fine, babe. you know there’ll be a couple of jerky, offhanded comments but i’ll fend them off. no problem. i don’t have to worry about them not liking me.” he states, hoping to quell that troubled expression. he fails to address the growing concern, as bile bubbles in the pit of your stomach.
“it’s not them, tetsu, you know how my mom is. she likes my cousins more than me, and now that we’re late, she’s going to somehow manage to relate it to my worth as a human being.” your face crumbles, make-up creasing at the corners of your eyes, and your hands tremble. kuroo scowls.
“let’s ditch it then. fuck your mom. i’m sick of her treating you like this. she has no fucking right to tell you how you should be spending your money, how you should be dressing, what you should eat, how you should look— it’s bullshit, Y/n, and you know it.”
of course you knew it was bullshit, and yes, you knew it wasn’t true. but how are you to abandon your parent, the person you depended on for survival for the first integral years of your life? while she hurt you more than she helped you, you still loved your mother. her word is not truth, but it’s hard to accept it as anything else. there’s always a method to her madness, and if she sees you one way, who’s to say she’s wrong? maybe you were too chunky, maybe you did eat too much, and maybe the job you were working was a waste of time. and maybe you didn’t spend your money too responsibly. it was something to consider. your mother loves you, after all.
“i know she loves me. she just… has a tough way of showing it. she’s just concerned, that’s all.” you tell him, a weak smile on your lips as you push the car door open. kuroo grits his teeth, irritated as hell, because he can never, ever fucking win against your mother. the power you give that woman is astonishing.
as soon as you’re through the front door, your older cousin is shoving a can of hard seltzer in your hand. it’s already cracked open and slick. you take a sip, and ask where your mom is. she motions to the kitchen.
kuroo is quick to rejoin you by your side, idle conversation with your materialistic family was not something he preferred to engage in, and he’d much rather nip a breakdown following a conversation with your mother in the bud than exchange pleasantries.
“hi mom.” you greet feebly, watching her back as she pushes a glass pan into the oven. she throws her mitts off, and spins around to face you with an aggravated expression.
“christ, y/n, you knew i needed help in the kitchen. you couldn’t bother coming a little earlier to help me out? i can’t ever fucking rely on you, you’re too damn lazy.”
kuroo watches you visibly deflate, curling into yourself instinctively, taking the blow with heavy resignation. “i’m so sorry, mom, i didn’t want tetsurou to speed through the traffic. i didn’t mean to, but i promise, i’m here to help you now. what can i do?”
she scoffs, effectively ignoring you as she returns to the cutting board on the counter, removing the stem from bell pepper laying atop it.
kuroo is already sick of it, sick of the breakdown he would have to deescalate later, no thanks to your deadbeat, piece of shit mother, and sick of how quickly you accepted defeat.
“well hello to you, too, y/m/n.” kuroo gets in, your mother simply grunts at him in response. kuroo’s eye twitches, but for the sake of your happiness, he keeps his mouth shut.
you try to resurrect whatever mood had illuminated the kitchen before, examining the contents of the bowl next to the stove and observing it needed to be mixed. as soon as it’s in your hands, it’s ripped away from your grip, your smug mother is eager to tell you,
“quit being such a pig. you can have one serving like everyone else when i’m done. just go sit down and try not to eat all of the appetizers.”
you want to cry, so so badly. you wished you were shocked, you wished that you hadn’t been expecting this, that this was out of the ordinary, and that it hurt so much lesser than it did. you wear your emotions so immensely on your face, and kuroo barely manages to keep it together.
“oh shit, babe, i forgot how bad of a cook your mom is. let’s go grab something else to eat. go say goodbye to your family, alright?” he tells you, the smile on his lips is tight with rusted hinges, creamy ripples in the corners.
your family was trailer trash, he knew that. they were self-absorbed, petty, and materialistic—everything that you were not. within that frame of time, he decides that you weren’t going to be around that anymore for your own good, and he knew you probably wouldn’t be happy with it at first, but you’d come to realize that it was better this way soon enough.
kuroo was going to perform surgery.
it’s when you come home from an exhausting day of work, and you want nothing more than to be held in the strong arms of your boyfriend when you get the news: mom was dead. murdered, and brutally at that.
you’re not tearful. in fact, you feel nothing at all. there’s no dread, no sorrow, no relief. there’s nothing to process, and yet kuroo regards you carefully, cupping your face gingerly as he wipes nonexistent tear tracks from under your eyes.
“how are you feeling, princess?”
before, you’d noticed kuroo was a little more high strung than usual, more alert. you attributed it to anxiousness, having to deal with the explosive aftermath of the discovery, the realization and your shock, but you could also recognize that kuroo wasn’t all there. he was watching you attentively, genuine concern was evident, but he was fervent.
he continues to speak, despite your silence, “that old bitch had it coming, baby. one of these days, she was going to drop dead from her last cigarette, or someone was going to get her. it was inevitable.”
was it? she seemed lively enough the weekend prior. alive and well enough to tell you how much of a pig you are and how disappointing you were. you always neglect to acknowledge that side of her, the facade, the front of charisma that had others insisting that she must be a great mother; that you were lucky. you can’t imagine who wanted to hurt her…
“and, now that she’s gone, y/n, i think we should consider moving to the town over—“
“tetsu, no. no. i… i need to stay here. with my family, with my…” your saliva is thick, like honey, in the back of your throat, “mom. i want to stay here with my mom. i can’t leave her.”
his chest rumbles beneath you as he groans, the vibrations shook your core, “i was hopin’ you wouldn’t say that.”
how many times had he held you so closely following a nasty argument with your mom? when she shamed you for going up a size? how often was he the only ally in your corner?
he couldn’t understand what evoked this reaction; as your primary caretaker, he expected more trust from you. less fear, less anger, and certainly less crying.
the house is so cute, so you. it’s conveniently remote, tucked into a generously distanced suburban neighborhood. the houses aren’t on top of each other, and the grocery store is a good 20 minute drive. he furnished the house to mirror what he understood you liked, so why were you so unhappy?
you’re situated on the edge of the bed, it’s king sized, plush, and aesthetically pleasing. but you’re pissed. scowling, the cuff grating the skin on your ankle shrinks beneath the heat of your glare.
“this is fucking crazy. you’re fucking crazy.” you’re saying, too sick and too bemused to look him in the eye. he can’t stand it.
“yeah, i’m crazy. i’m the one who defends the person who has driven them to the point of near suicide and self harm and extreme depression, that i literally cannot function without support.” he spits. he was leant against the doorframe, observing for signs of life or perhaps forgiveness and resignation. he was met with neither. just that same pathetic anger, unmatched and unrivaled by his strength.
you falter at his words, and he smirks. he could dismantle any and all arguments you posed with an apathetic definitiveness, and it made the hair on your arms stand, and your heart fall.
“tetsurou, i don’t want to be here. i wanted to stay by my family. it doesn’t matter how badly they’ve treated me, and i fucking know the bad outweighs the good, but i… i just can’t. i can’t leave them behind. i don’t want to cut them out, they’re all i have. they’re my family.” you’re tearful, pleading, but you’ve gotten thus far without any retreat from kuroo. and that spoke volumes—this was the way it was going to be. you just couldn’t accept it.
in the midst of your plea, he had gritted his teeth and stalked toward you. his hand, rough and firm, grips your chin, guiding it upward. your eyes meet his.
he’s pained slightly, but his eyes are more stoney and unwavering than all else. he is eternally unyielding, and it’s painful.
“i’m your family, y/n.” he says.
“you’re right.” you concede. “you are my family, well, you’re like them, anyway. you’re making my decisions for me, you’re hurting me, and you don’t care. you rationalize it with a smile and some bullshit apology, some crap you tell yourself and you think i’ll just accept. but this? this is wrong. this is not love. i’m your prisoner.”
“jesus christ!” he swears, bringing his hand to his head to seize a fistful of hair. “everything i do, everything i’ve done, it’s been for you! i fucking love you, y/n. i would kill for you.”
oh. “kill?”
you fall back onto the bed, sickly. the soft cotton prickles your skin, and the pale ceiling, smoothed to perfection, is spinning in taunting circles before your eyes.
“y/n?”
kill, he’d kill for you. kill. kill. kill.
your ankle is bolstered to the floor, you’re fucking helpless. before you stands the master of your fate, the shaper of your past, the fucking killer of your mother. he’s the warden, and yet he is also the doting boyfriend.
you lick your lips. you could work with that.
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springsmile · 6 months
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thinkin abt needy yan bokuto who takes ur virginity for the first time
bokuto who roughly possesses you— takes your jaw into his hand and (with a bruising vigor) presses his lips to yours. there’s a momentary dink of your teeth meeting, before his tongue is acquainting itself with yours. slick and warm, mapping the expanse of your mouth.
your protests muffled—your head is immobilized but trembling with the effort to shake your head, recoil.
“cmon baby, wanna make you feel good.” he’s pleading, the sound floating into your mouth and you’re choking on its sheer saccharinity.
“you want this, i know you do.” your inner thighs are pulsing at the cupping of his impressive torso. it’s a hamstring stretch in itself. even worse, his fingers maneuver around the dampened lace of your panties and tug them aside. they’re sticking to the side of your labia, and the sensation has you responding viscerally.
his next movement is unceremonious. his thick and coarse fingers plunge inside of you— the pads kissing the sides of your walls, and nicking that spot—your eyes bulge, mouth glistening and agape in a soundless cry.
“see? look how wet you are.”
if you had the capacity, you’d be gritting your teeth, but your only outright means of defiance was a breathy gasp, “b-bokuto, stop.”
he pulls back from the countless open-mouthed love bites he’d carefully worked into your neck (glowing red, incomplete circles, shining beautifully), and tilts his head.
“but i don’t want to.”
it doesn’t sound malicious. it doesn’t even look like it. but it’s petulantly dangerous. more so, he wants something, and what he wants is wrapped up in his hands. he has unparalleled strength to covet it, so it’s his. you’re not going anywhere.
he can’t even understand why you’re begging him to stop.
the tempo is incomprehensible, absolutely nonsensical. you hope his fingers cramp—the strokes keep evolving. shallow, quick, slow, deep and curled. bokuto presses his lips to your ear, so warm and wet, the same stimulus expressed by every inch of your skin. he’s panting, mewling like it’s you who’s torturing him.
“please, please let me eat you out, princess. god, please. i need it.” he’s near whimpering. it’s downright pathetic. “we’ll feel so good. i swear, i swear baby. please.”
you can’t even breathe.
his head is lowering to that precious, sensitive space between your thighs, lips closing around your nervous nub. your hands leap to his hair, fistfuls gathered in each, and you’re pulling. you can’t figure out if you’re pushing him away or keeping him in place. his tongue scales the side of your clit, and with hollowed cheeks, he suckles tightly. air-tight, and pulsating under the muscle.
callouses are petting your sides, his fingers twitching as they reach the valley of your breasts, before climbing to your nipples. he’s pinching tightly, rolling them between his forefingers and thumbs with a passion akin to the same extended to your cunt.
a strangled gasp scratches your throat, you’re vibrating at the stimulation, and as soon as he releases the bud with a reverberating pop!, something so balmy and intense rips open at the pit of your stomach. chest heaving, you ride the high with fabric-clad fists.
he’s still slurping, varying between tantalizing kitten-licking to full on fucking you on his tongue. every part of bokuto was fucking jacked and graced by boggling strength, the bruises left on your tits and your thighs weren’t as jarring as the force behind each thrust of his tongue.
his head retreats unexpectedly, and you’re fervently grappling at this moment of reprieve— but before you can suck in much needed mouthfuls of air, he’s pressing his sticky tip to your hole. precum and your slick smears and trickles onto the sheets, yielding a sickening solution of lust. its warmth intermingles with that of your sweat, frigid with dread, leaving your skin crawling and begging to be satiated more than before.
you jerk, fear tightening your joints as your eyes snap open, “n-no, wait!”
your hips creak under his grip, and when your gaze languidly meets his, you’re resigned, blinking back tears of desperation. he’s not humping your leg all needy and pleading anymore. he’s not entertaining your begs or pleas of yield. he’s not begging or pleading with you anymore, either. he’s gonna take you. but don’t worry!! he’ll make you feel real good <3
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springsmile · 6 months
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GENSHIN HIGH SCHOOL AU — kazuha is high as fuck and keeps lookin atchu 👀 *QUICK IN BETWEEN BLURB*
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your eyes meet.
oh, fuck. shit.
it wasn’t intentional— well, no, it was. did he notice?
you chance another glance— fuck. they’re burnt red, so is the sclera. what do they say? once is a coincidence, twice is you’re a fucking thirsty creepy stalker?
he scoots over in your direction, and your palms begin to create the world’s largest man made puddle in the world.
he’s high out of his mind. he’s close enough to conspicuously study the peculiar paleness of his hair, and the tight tie that holds it in place.
he’s still looking for your eyes that you’d torn away in your utter embarrassment.
“hey, did you want a hit?” he shamelessly lifts his cart in the air. you splutter—luckily, the class is rowdy enough to conceal your sheer bemusement.
“kazuha—jesus christ.” you breathed, wretching his arm down, whilst you watch him with an unconscious grin sliding across your lips.
“so you don’t?” he tilts his head to the side, adjusting the collar of his dress shirt. “oh, you wanna buy?”
you swallow anxiously, his eyes watch the bob of your throat. you chose to ignore that. it couldn’t mean anything—no, it was inconsequential. maybe it rang as loud as it had in your ears.
you chose this battle. “yeah, uh, do i zelle ya?”
his smile is lazy, and his words carry an soft, unstable lilt to them. “nah. you can test the product first.”
you raise your eyebrows. “so you let anyone just try a free ounce of your shit?”
he snorted, his head craning back in a gentle chuckle. and when his gaze returned to yours, something sultry flitted across his face.
“no, [name]. that was my mistake. i meant that we’ll test the product together.” his eyelids fall halfway, and he leant in closer—you can smell it on his breath. oreos he must’ve infused weed into. somehow.
your eyes flit around your acting class apprehensively—were you getting weird looks? did it look like the most sensual drug deal ever was taking place?
he nips this motion in the bud, taking your jaw in his palm. his eyes are soft. cotton soft, but still shining with recognition.
“that was a flirtation. we’re gonna get high together, and… i’m confident you’re smart enough to figure out what’ll happen next.”
“oh.” you’re blinking rapidly. oh. oh. those were stares of reciprocation. he made the first move— like you’d ever—
“[name]?” he murmurs into your ear, before laying his temple on your shoulder. “did i frighten you away?”
your lips curl. cute.
“no. i was just wondering what i’m going to tell my boss on saturday.”
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springsmile · 8 months
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springsmile · 9 months
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GENSHIN HIGH SCHOOL AU — kazuha is high as fuck and keeps lookin atchu 👀 *QUICK IN BETWEEN BLURB*
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your eyes meet.
oh, fuck. shit.
it wasn’t intentional— well, no, it was. did he notice?
you chance another glance— fuck. they’re burnt red, so is the sclera. what do they say? once is a coincidence, twice is you’re a fucking thirsty creepy stalker?
he scoots over in your direction, and your palms begin to create the world’s largest man made puddle in the world.
he’s high out of his mind. he’s close enough to conspicuously study the peculiar paleness of his hair, and the tight tie that holds it in place.
he’s still looking for your eyes that you’d torn away in your utter embarrassment.
“hey, did you want a hit?” he shamelessly lifts his cart in the air. you splutter—luckily, the class is rowdy enough to conceal your sheer bemusement.
“kazuha—jesus christ.” you breathed, wretching his arm down, whilst you watch him with an unconscious grin sliding across your lips.
“so you don’t?” he tilts his head to the side, adjusting the collar of his dress shirt. “oh, you wanna buy?”
you swallow anxiously, his eyes watch the bob of your throat. you chose to ignore that. it couldn’t mean anything—no, it was inconsequential. maybe it rang as loud as it had in your ears.
you chose this battle. “yeah, uh, do i zelle ya?”
his smile is lazy, and his words carry an soft, unstable lilt to them. “nah. you can test the product first.”
you raise your eyebrows. “so you let anyone just try a free ounce of your shit?”
he snorted, his head craning back in a gentle chuckle. and when his gaze returned to yours, something sultry flitted across his face.
“no, [name]. that was my mistake. i meant that we’ll test the product together.” his eyelids fall halfway, and he leant in closer—you can smell it on his breath. oreos he must’ve infused weed into. somehow.
your eyes flit around your acting class apprehensively—were you getting weird looks? did it look like the most sensual drug deal ever was taking place?
he nips this motion in the bud, taking your jaw in his palm. his eyes are soft. cotton soft, but still shining with recognition.
“that was a flirtation. we’re gonna get high together, and… i’m confident you’re smart enough to figure out what’ll happen next.”
“oh.” you’re blinking rapidly. oh. oh. those were stares of reciprocation. he made the first move— like you’d ever—
“[name]?” he murmurs into your ear, before laying his temple on your shoulder. “did i frighten you away?”
your lips curl. cute.
“no. i was just wondering what i’m going to tell my boss on saturday.”
169 notes · View notes
springsmile · 9 months
Text
over my shoulder || 01
18+ | h. shinso x f. reader
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series masterlist
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warnings: non-con, smut, pre-established trauma (r*pe), extreme anxiety/paranoia, victim blaming/shaming, abuse of prescriptions, self harm, suicidal ideation, disassociation, negativity around hospitalization, violent intrusive thoughts, kidnapping, murder, specific reader characterizations, manipulation, anorexia/bulimia allusions
** reader’s quirk is enhanced senses. upon activation, emotions and sensations are pretty much exacerbated. reader never learns how to channel or control it to its full potential, only to turn it on and off.
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you would not walk out that door without a sense of pride toward your makeup application. you could decisively say the wings of your eyeliner were not up to par. if you paused now, the only thoughts your mind would be able to conjure would be ones of how one wing is pointing downward, the other seemingly kissing your brow, one bulky, and the other thin.
you’re late. so, so late. you know you won’t get in trouble, per se, but your pay would dip under what you’d estimated for the week, which was irritating in itself. you tell yourself it’s worth sparing yourself a smidge of the humiliation that accompanies leaving the walls of your apartment.
like every other day, it takes the realization that you have 10 minutes to get to your job that requires a 25 minute commute to narrow your eyes at the mirror on your desk, reflecting some unsightly black smudges framing your plain eyes. you had to admit that it was better than nothing, but nothing was just that— nothing. without the black you were disgusting, but with it… you guess that made you… palatable? nothing worth coveting, yet also not a sight which averted gazes. perfect for you.
beside you, your phone vibrates, and you feel the reverberations through the desk intensely. you jolt, silently cursing yourself and imagine a broken dam, water pouring from each crack and cranny. then, you imagine it all sealed up, halting the circulation… now, the lack thereof. that’s how you shut your quirk off; you’ve returned to your regular state of a hammering heart and sweaty palms.
your apartment complex is exactly what someone would envision upon estimating to them your pathetic salary. you worked at a bookstore, after all. it wasn’t exactly like you were some front-line worker, providing a necessary labor. you couldn’t complain. it was livable, nothing to sneeze at.
it’s cement—cold granite. the railings were once painted black and peeling, and your door had gaping orifices where its wooden fragments once laid. the apartment itself was dinky. you cleaned it consistently and decorated with a modest charm, but the odor of dampness was lingering in every corner. the complex was borderline ancient, built before the invention of the elevator, but it was at least a place you could pleasantly call home. ‘bad neighborhoods’ were hardly ever indicative of the tenants who lived inside the units.
you walk to work, having been fortunate enough to lease somewhere close enough to a place you liked working at. the other jobs were nothing short of disarray— inadequate managers hiring you on the spot during interviews out of desperation, and a disorienting lack of organization. needless to say, you were content at the bookstore.
currently, you’re conjuring scenarios that do nothing to soothe the thrumming of your heart, slamming against the cream cable sweater you’d thrown on in a haste to cover the largest of your insecurities—the vision of a car skidding off the street and plowing into your form, leaving fragments of your brain matter splattered into the pavement. next, you think of the thinnest, fresher piece of paper slicing your eye in two. now, you’re cringing. it’s replying in your mind over and over again. you swallow a wad of glue in your throat, eyes raking in your surroundings for a distraction.
a stray cat. it trills softly at you. you somehow manage a smile, and glance at your phone before deciding you could briefly pet the kitty.
its fur is a pure black, the kind that enveloped your eyes with a stark intensity when you shut the curtains, turned off the tv, and closed your bedroom door with the lights off. you’d always forget to turn on your fairy lights. it would making your eyes hum, an invisible pressure pushing downward, but it was pleasantly dissimilar this time.
its eyes are a gem-like amber, and they glisten in the waxing morning sun. you liked the shape of its pupils. almost a rhombus, softened at the edges, wide and dilated. you assumed it was happy, and that made you a little happy too.
you eventually pass a group of teenage girls, and you inadvertently shrink into yourself, chest seized with panic as they pass. you could’ve sworn they threw you a glance, eyes maliciously narrowed. your mouth goes dry when they crane their necks back and let out a shallow laugh.
you glance down at yourself once they’re out of your peripherals. your opaque tights were suddenly friction against your legs. itchy. you can’t even be upset at your fleeting elation.
with shaky fingers pinching the fabric, hoping for some surface-level relief, you realize you’ve reached the store. you pull on the dangling pieces of your backpack straps—the ones that tighten—and exhale as the padding presses to your armpits. tight and secure.
“morning, (y/n)!” you co-worker flashes you a radiant grin from behind the register, before you can will your lips to curve and feel that uncomfortable stretch in your cheeks, she’s back to bagging a customer’s purchases.
you sigh, locating one of the empty computers to punch your numbers in on.
“excuse me.” someone coughed at you. you raise your eyes ever so slightly, but zero in on the space beneath their eyes and though above the apples of your cheeks. they’re very tanned, and their skin is dry and rough.
“i need help finding a book, it’s called—“
“i’m sorry,” you interject timidly, interlocking your fingers with tight, white knuckles. it’s the only way you knew how to steady your composure. “i’m not clocked in yet, and i need to put my things away. i can grab someone to help you right now, though?”
he stares at you indignantly, with a pompous upward tilt of his chin. he’s looking down at you from his nose. your stomach does a 360 flip, and you’re bloating. absolutely sick.
“you work here, don’t you? you’re supposed to help a paying patron when they ask you for help.” he continues in disdain. you think of several quips, witty remarks that could maybe patch up your dignity that this man was so indelicately chipping away at. “i guess i can’t expect much from people like you. always so lazy. i see you all hanging around, talking. tch, whatever. thanks for nothing.”
he whips around and saunters away. you blink. the exchange hadn’t been fully registered and processed in your brain.
you know with utmost certainty that you’d soon be rendered to a hunched over, teary heap in the break room. and although the cancellation of your quirk hindered all emotions for an unspecified length of time, you could feel the onslaught of twinges racking your heart. and then, you find yourself trudging to break room in lethargy. you had nightmares again last night, having been jolted awake by your own tremors and cold beaded sweat dotting every conceivable part of your body. you’d had to shower. showering wasn’t fun for you.
you tried to relish in the knowledge that your lunch break was within the next two hours! whoopie! you wouldn’t let yourself eat, though. hoisting your achy feet onto those rigid metal chairs would be revitalizing enough.
when you find yourself on the sales floor again, you start for the customer service desk. as you had observed that there’s someone patiently waiting there, their fingers idly drumming on the worn wood. you half smile. maybe they wouldn’t give you an earful of all of their inconveniences that didn’t pertain to you. that’d be nice.
“hi! sorry to keep you waiting.” you flash your well practiced ‘how can i help you today, valued customer?’ smile.
it’s another man, and you instinctively lower your gaze to that spot on his face that quells the exacerbating effects of your quirk. if you’d been taking in the whole of his countenance, perhaps you would have noted the abrupt shift in his eyes, insisted that a manager was calling you on your earpiece. you’d seen that look a lot. and when you did catch sight of it, it reminded you of high school, and that alone was enough to make you bail out— potentially, clock out early.
“hi, i was just looking for books on renting trucks? i’m looking to make a business out if it.” he smiles crookedly.
you pause, lips pressed in a tight, thin line. renting trucks? how the fuck were you supposed to search for a book like that?
“i’ll try, but no promises.” you swallowed, fingers licking the key caps hastily. you wanted to close this exchange as quickly as you could. then you could busy yourself with a task that didn’t require your deteriorating social skills.
“it’s weird, i know.” he chuckled. it felt pernicious in nature to you, and you certainly didn’t appreciate his attempt to revive the conversation. your palms were growing balmier by the second.
“nah, not weird. i’m just not sure how to search for it on here.” you half-lied, furrowing your brows at the search results. there were a myriad of titles relating to trucks, but you couldn’t conceive why someone would write a how-to on renting them to people, let alone why this man would want to reference one, instead of an article online. needless to say, you were having trouble schooling your expression. if that face you spent hours on contorting to perfection in the mirror were to falter, everything would be shot straight to hell. you couldn’t handle a nasty disagreement breaking out at the unbridled twitch of your eye.
“ah, i get’cha. let me see.” and without leaving any room for dissent, or breathing, he’s leant over the counter. very much invading your personal space, and very much violating company policy.
your mouth quivers at the corners, attempting to form phantoms of phrases you should’ve had the spine to utter. the poignance of his cologne has long invaded your nose, a more mature scent, one reserved for a man of his age. perhaps three times that of yours. get away get away get away.
he straightens, offering you a complacent yellowed grin. “i don’t really get that program you use, but i’m guessing you don’t got what i’m looking for?”
“correct, sorry about that.” you tell him stiffly. you swear his breath was sticky, humid, and clinging to the skin of your neck. you suppress a shiver.
“no problem, darlin’. i was just lookin’ for a side hustle, ‘cause i work in law enforcement and i wanted to hop onto that business owner bandwagon.” he’s not rambling, he’s not making small talk—he wants your attention. he wants you to engage, and he wants you to be interested. this is all sickeningly apparent to you as you fumble to select your next words. you know you’d have to humor him only slightly; blatant indifference could be interpreted as aggression and get you a strike. you didn’t need any more of those.
“oh, that’s pretty cool. my dad works in law enforcement.” you reply softly, praying that your inauthentic interest would be apparent to him. though, men are either willingly or inherently stupid, you learned. the gentleman before you was no exception.
“aw, yeah? what city?”
fuck fuck fuck fuck!
you’re left scrambling, mouth gaping, dry and full of sand. you feel every artery in your body painfully pulsate and flush against your skin, pleading to be torn free and relieved, and remind you that you’re alive and you feel like you’re gonna die. you don’t even know if you have the capacity to deactivate your quirk right now—you felt like you deserved this; you practically instigated the conversation—stupid!
it doesn’t occur to you to lie—yet another vulgar display of your absentmindedness. you tell him the truth, and to add further insult to injury, you’re unable to distract yourself from his slippery gaze. they held little regard, and revealed each deplorable thought with the blink of his eye. it was dehumanizing. the way his cheeks were carved into this smile that failed to accentuate his duchenne markers. your next move is a grave error, one that, if your head was in its right place, you wouldn’t have contemplated. looking into his eyes—the skin is flat, his eyes are visible, unobstructed and—you know that much. he’s not really smiling.
“i’m sorry, i can’t stop looking at you. you’re so beautiful.”
twitching uselessly at your sides, your hands come to fist your sweater, now damp from the slickness encasing your hands. the wool catches your sweat and sucks it in. much like the breaths slipping in and out of your aching lungs. the balmy air clings to the walls, perhaps as terrified as you were, before being ripped from their sanctuary and nakedly thrust into the open.
“thank you.” you gushed? you attempted to. the keyboard before you was littered with varying puddles of sweat. you didn’t appreciate the dampened wool prickling your torso. it felt like tv static, the feeling when you’d hover your fingertips in front of, and this inconceivable force would kiss and lick your skin. you’re privy to each and every sensation that your being can house, the overload was almost too much, you’d had to search deeply within yourself and pull out what you could.
“here, take down my number.” he’s offering, that smile never leaves his lips nor meets his eyes, but you could center yourself again. it’s okay. he’s sweating exorbitantly, unabashedly clinging to his armpits. you would laugh in a normal circumstance.
stiffly, you reach for a sticky note and a pen. you’re pushing both toward him with your index finger, deliberately dodging the potential of contact—he’s grasping your hand tightly. you gasp and there’s bile searing your esophagus.
“it’s nice to meet you…” he references your name tag with a brisk glance as though his eyes hadn’t been raking in your entire figure for the duration of your exchange. “(y/n). your name is also beautiful.”
you’re only able to smile and nod.
“it’ll break my heart if you don’t text me, you know?” he chuckles lightly, but his tone is anything but. he anticipates your compliance, he thinks he’s subdued you into contacting him, or perhaps he’s genuinely convinced that he somehow charmed you into pursuing a relationship with him. he’s wrong.
as soon as his dubious eyes leave your vicinity, you take the sticky note into your hand, and with what remains of your strength, squeeze it. the edges are sharpened at the pressure, like thorny rose stems. they press into the joints of your fingers, but you don’t mind. by the time it��s released from your grasp, it’s like paper-mache.
lunch had trudged into your hour slot like an unyielding horse, unwittingly dragged along. your elation is muted, but palpable. it’s not like you were going to use it for its established purpose, anyway. you’d nap in the break room, preparing to flip-flop from position to position in those awful metal chairs, terrified that you’d reclined too deeply and slump onto the floor.
you can never sleep though. not really. it’s this hellish limbo. a plane where it could be argued that you were conscious, or that you were asleep. the sibling of sleep paralysis.
without a single breath between the back of your eyelids and the sudden shrill blaring, your nerves are electrified. and your body, with some newfound cognizance, snaps you upright. eyes blearily darting to and fro for danger, or the subject of your overstimulation, you find nothing but the alarm on your phone. the force of its vibrations have it circling with intense shutters. you hit stop.
your phone jerks to life again, screen flashing your generic wallpaper at you. there’s a notification lingering below the time display, a segment from some big shot newspaper. beneath the headline is some excruciatingly pretentious action shot of a hero; one with indigo tresses that were suspended in the hair, and bandages like tentacles unfurling from around his neck. the headline reads:
Villainous Quirk Saves the Day! 20 Lives Saved With a Single Word.
you can’t say your interest was piqued.
another day, another victim.
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you hate leaving from the back exit. while it was designated for employees, some exclusive perk you should be immeasurably grateful for, it wasn’t afforded the same glare from the floodlights the adjacent parking lot was. comparatively, it was doused with light.
you’re one of the last to leave, the manager on duty singled you out and made you count the money in the registers. you’re horrible at keeping track at the tens and twenties, and not to mention your unwavering uneasiness. you hadn’t recovered from that unseemly encounter.
you’ve snugly positioned the various keys slid onto the ring between your fingers. they’re like claws—extracted kitty claws—and you’re prepared to drive it into some sicko’s chest at a moment’s notice.
ensuring the receiving room door had softly clicked shut behind you, you started off into the direction your quaint apartment complex resided. it takes less than a second for the hair on your arms and neck to flare up, and it’s even sooner your skin is forcibly aware of the sinister warmth of a hand—irrefutably larger than your own—locked onto your shoulder.
your instinct is to look over your shoulder. you suppress it, and instead tighten the grip on your the makeshift weapon, jutting out with an unparalleled menace.
you whirl around and swing, right for his sternum. you make contact, but its not hard enough. you’re not sure if it was the velocity that fell short, or if it was the puny strength that accompanied the strike that sealed your blunder. either way, he’s far from incapacitated. in fact, he’s enraged. you can feel the corona of his fury, it’s radiant and extending.
“i know that you had a long day, babe, but you couldn’t sneak a text in at all?”
his own clip is hard enough. it’s aimed straight at your gut, and it makes contact with more than the surface of your stomach. you think your intestines may have just been introduced to your kidneys. you splutter around that familiar acid.
you’re unable to cradle your belly as you’re plunged into another agonizing sensation. the uneven bricks—some ugly, stupid stylistic design—are cutting into the skin on your back.
“we can make this easy, or hard. i’m good either way, so the choice is yours, sweetheart.” this smile, wicked and conscienceless, begins in his eyes instead. they were more terrifying than the split of his lips. his hands, callous and aged, descend down your sides, pushing your panties and waistband of your jeans aside so he can clutch your bare hips. this terror, this terror you know all to well, the one that seized you when you awake from the most heinous dream, the same one almost every night when you’re transported back to high school, back to the shaming and the touching and the crying and—
this.
“please don’t do this.” you mutter, now your tongue is immobile. limp and numb in your mouth. some thick, wet deadweight that pulls you down to the soles of your feet. you wish your punch had been that heavy.
“man, i thought you’d be wrigglin’ by now. looks like you want it just as bad. i didn’t take you for a needy slut, (y/n).”
you flinch, flitting images and snippets of sound rush before you and climb into your muscles; ensuring your helplessness. you were very well-acquainted with that term.
you think it might hurt less, this time, if you pretend you’re not there. shallow-gazed, the darkness of the night blanketing the sky and presenting a comfortingly warm veil over your eyes. chin craning up, pointing to the north star.
he makes quick work of your jeans, they’re crunching around your ankles, as denim and fluid motion do not coincide. you fucking hate it. it’s almost as scratchy as the voices screaming at you from within the steel walls of your head, flailing and slamming on all sides, begging you to cry for help, begging you to turn your quirk back on, so maybe you’ll feel something, some terror, and leap into action. it’s growing weaker by the second, and you’re clamping your thighs shut as he growls a curse at you.
“what do we have here?” a voice from the dark muses. you might even say it held a semblance of amusement. ah, yet another sick fuck to partake in your humiliation.
“fuck off man, we’re just having some fun. we ain’t hurting anybody, isn’t that right, baby?”
the silence spoke for itself, you guess.
the anonymous gentleman, evading your line of sight, effortlessly conquers your assailant. you expect some cringey catchphrase, a declaration of victory or defeat, maybe some name calling, but you can’t hear anything but the boiling hot blood circling your ears.
you don’t need to see him to know from the shuddering groans and shallow gasps of air and pleading and promises of atonement (never directed at you) that tear from his mouth, that your savior was well-versed in combat. you don’t even try to conceal your chuckle, one that ascends your throat wryly and produces some stinging pain. a hero.
“walk down to the police station, and confess.” these words were unlike the ones he posed in his prior inquiry. the contrast, though, couldn’t be placed. the man who nearly became the brand new subject of your nightmares, heeds. face blank, eyes stoney and vacant. there’s no resistance, no more pleading or crying. it reminded you of the instantaneous numbness that sweetly enveloped you when you patched up that dam in your mind. then he’s languidly walking in opposite direction. it’s unsurprising that he knows the route.
now, you’re the object of the hero’s attention. and to your dismay, you quickly discern that he’s the hero with the villainous quirk. the very same that backhandedly glorified him in the article.
“that’s rude.” you mumble.
his staring persists, a muted violet with hollow pupils. you’d always heard that the eyes were the gateway to the soul, but upon your unwitting contact, you were compelled to judge that he was soulless.
the observation was brief enough to settle that the movement couldn’t have been misconstrued for eye contact.
“w-what?” you blurt, eyes cast at the asphalt in shame. you often took solace in the fleetingness of passerby gazes—even that of people your age. regrettably, you could feel the judgement, the assessment, and the heat of his prodding eyes.
“nothing. i was just thinking about how you never screamed once. i never heard you ask for help.” he reveals with an unabashed curiosity seeping into his tone. yet, the sentiment was lost on his eyes.
yeah, well, years of guilt and torment will do that to ya.
“i… didn’t think anyone would come to help.” you admitted quietly, your hand is wrapped around your forearm so tightly, you were beginning to lose feeling. at some point, your quirk had activated inadvertently. the static-y tingles envelope the skin.
“really. how come?”
the shift in his tone was… nothing of note. so slight, so easy to miss, but perceivable, nonetheless, if you willed yourself to observe it. the effort was not something that came naturally to you. most people were none the wiser, and you were no exception. as far as your ears had gathered, he was speaking plainly.
“i don’t expect anyone to act selflessly. not even heroes. no one’s ever helped me when things like… this happen.” things you’d never bothered sharing with anyone were unfiltered as they left your tongue, and you’re flummoxed. where went your restraint and trepidation?
your eyes are still cemented to the floor. and the hero, though intrigued, was growing tired of your hesitance.
“you could look me in the eyes when you thank me, at least.”
your breath escapes you at his unexpected audacious tone. but you know you’re in no position to chastise someone, as unsolicited as it was, who did in fact come to your rescue.
the air staggers in your trachea, slinking upside and downside the membrane as your eyes reorient themselves. they’d been fixed on the asphalt. your mary janes. and the intentional design of the boots strapped to his feet. the light above your ankles was disconcerting—having attrited the cordiality you found in what wasn’t another person.
unwittingly, bound to fulfill what was the edict of gratitude and respect in society, you lift your head, your sight following closely behind.
upon contact, your own vision sways, and you don’t know if the fault lay in the fatigue militating your uprightness, or the interference of cohesion in your head.
all at once, his voice becomes softer, and his face contorts from that laidback, complacent grin and relaxes entirely. almost tranquil. you’re not sure about his eyes though. for all your lack of skill in all areas concerning social reciprocity, you were excellent at avoidance. you could spent a very comfortably and fulfilled lifetime without staring anyone in the eye.
you weren’t sure if you could hold it together if you saw pity swirling around those murky irises.
“that was a joke. a bad one.” he says, it’s an apology without the proper structure. you’d take it. you didn’t know him, and you were set on having it remain that way. you’re hoping you become another faceless civilian in the cloud of enthusiastic praises, extensions of gratitude, love admissions, and just unremarkable people. you hope you’re another random headstone in a cemetery that people pass and never consider the bones beneath the soil, what they were composed of. you want to stop this charade of the assessment of your well-being, one supposedly conducted out of compassion, and go home and scrub your skin raw.
“you can skip the pleasantries. i don’t need any services. i’m going home. thanks for your help.” you say quickly, and when you leant over to scoop the contents of your purse into your hands, you found that the hero had beaten you to the punch.
“i’m shinso hitoshi.” he says as amicably as he can muster. the artificiality isn’t difficult to see through. he offers you your purse, palm outstretched where the strap laid loosely. you watch the mole under his eye as you regard him.
the data is before your eyes, yet you couldn’t construe it one way or another.
the metal toes of his boots point at you, and his eyes flit across the features of your face, mapping the expanse— it’s absolutely unnerving.
you couldn’t read his body language, gauge his facial expression, or even bear to allow the intermingling of your gazes.
“it’s nice to meet you, i’m (y/n).” you weren’t going to disclose any obvious identifiers, leaving you susceptible to a breach of privacy. your last name wasn’t necessary in this introduction— one you prayed would soon reach its conclusion.
he breathes a chuckle; your disinterest is painstakingly apparent, comically so.
“well… (y/n), i really insist; let me take you home. walk you. what just happened was… a lot. i’d bet you’d feel safer if—“
“you’d lose.” you snipped quickly. “i’ll go now. thank you again, sir.”
you now your head, intentionally at a higher decline, avoiding that pain in your lower neck that’s reserved for only the utmost respect. you spin on your heel, and you’re blinking back the fiery pain in your eyes.
you swore to whatever god that refused to heed any of your pleas that your back was scorched from a pair of eyes. but when you looked over your shoulder, the only sight that greeted you was that of flickering floodlights.
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110 notes · View notes
springsmile · 9 months
Text
over my shoulder
yan. shinso x reader | series masterlist | 18+
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descr: with extreme and debilitating anxiety that has led to your desensitization, you think you're privy to feeling out danger before it strikes you. you're wrong.
<alt text: ( stalker!shinso )>
warnings: non-con, smut, pre-established trauma (r*pe), extreme anxiety/paranoia, victim blaming/shaming, abuse of prescriptions, self harm, suicidal ideation, disassociation, negativity around hospitalization, violent intrusive thoughts, kidnapping, murder, specific reader characterizations, manipulation, anorexia/bulimia allusions
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note 01: sooo this is largely based upon my own trauma and mental framework. it's a really really dark depiction. it might dampen your mood, but i promise it's a good read :) ! please make sure to examine the warning tags closely.
02**: reader's quirk is enhanced senses. upon activation, emotions and sensations are pretty much exacerbated. reader never learns how to channel or control it to its full potential, only to turn it on and off.
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˗ˋˏ CHAPTER LIST ˎˊ˗
01. VICTIMHOOD
190 notes · View notes
springsmile · 10 months
Text
thinkin abt needy yan bokuto who takes ur virginity for the first time
bokuto who roughly possesses you— takes your jaw into his hand and (with a bruising vigor) presses his lips to yours. there’s a momentary dink of your teeth meeting, before his tongue is acquainting itself with yours. slick and warm, mapping the expanse of your mouth.
your protests muffled—your head is immobilized but trembling with the effort to shake your head, recoil.
“cmon baby, wanna make you feel good.” he’s pleading, the sound floating into your mouth and you’re choking on its sheer saccharinity.
“you want this, i know you do.” your inner thighs are pulsing at the cupping of his impressive torso. it’s a hamstring stretch in itself. even worse, his fingers maneuver around the dampened lace of your panties and tug them aside. they’re sticking to the side of your labia, and the sensation has you responding viscerally.
his next movement is unceremonious. his thick and coarse fingers plunge inside of you— the pads kissing the sides of your walls, and nicking that spot—your eyes bulge, mouth glistening and agape in a soundless cry.
“see? look how wet you are.”
if you had the capacity, you’d be gritting your teeth, but your only outright means of defiance was a breathy gasp, “b-bokuto, stop.”
he pulls back from the countless open-mouthed love bites he’d carefully worked into your neck (glowing red, incomplete circles, shining beautifully), and tilts his head.
“but i don’t want to.”
it doesn’t sound malicious. it doesn’t even look like it. but it’s petulantly dangerous. more so, he wants something, and what he wants is wrapped up in his hands. he has unparalleled strength to covet it, so it’s his. you’re not going anywhere.
he can’t even understand why you’re begging him to stop.
the tempo is incomprehensible, absolutely nonsensical. you hope his fingers cramp—the strokes keep evolving. shallow, quick, slow, deep and curled. bokuto presses his lips to your ear, so warm and wet, the same stimulus expressed by every inch of your skin. he’s panting, mewling like it’s you who’s torturing him.
“please, please let me eat you out, princess. god, please. i need it.” he’s near whimpering. it’s downright pathetic. “we’ll feel so good. i swear, i swear baby. please.”
you can’t even breathe.
his head is lowering to that precious, sensitive space between your thighs, lips closing around your nervous nub. your hands leap to his hair, fistfuls gathered in each, and you’re pulling. you can’t figure out if you’re pushing him away or keeping him in place. his tongue scales the side of your clit, and with hollowed cheeks, he suckles tightly. air-tight, and pulsating under the muscle.
callouses are petting your sides, his fingers twitching as they reach the valley of your breasts, before climbing to your nipples. he’s pinching tightly, rolling them between his forefingers and thumbs with a passion akin to the same extended to your cunt.
a strangled gasp scratches your throat, you’re vibrating at the stimulation, and as soon as he releases the bud with a reverberating pop!, something so balmy and intense rips open at the pit of your stomach. chest heaving, you ride the high with fabric-clad fists.
he’s still slurping, varying between tantalizing kitten-licking to full on fucking you on his tongue. every part of bokuto was fucking jacked and graced by boggling strength, the bruises left on your tits and your thighs weren’t as jarring as the force behind each thrust of his tongue.
his head retreats unexpectedly, and you’re fervently grappling at this moment of reprieve— but before you can suck in much needed mouthfuls of air, he’s pressing his sticky tip to your hole. precum and your slick smears and trickles onto the sheets, yielding a sickening solution of lust. its warmth intermingles with that of your sweat, frigid with dread, leaving your skin crawling and begging to be satiated more than before.
you jerk, fear tightening your joints as your eyes snap open, “n-no, wait!”
your hips creak under his grip, and when your gaze languidly meets his, you’re resigned, blinking back tears of desperation. he’s not humping your leg all needy and pleading anymore. he’s not entertaining your begs or pleas of yield. he’s not begging or pleading with you anymore, either. he’s gonna take you. but don’t worry!! he’ll make you feel real good <3
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springsmile · 10 months
Text
hi hi hi !!!!!
i know it’s not a lot but i truly am thankful for my new 100 followers :-)) support, little or big, makes such a huge difference. motivation is hard to come by, so thank you!! <333
i wanted to use this post and opportunity to advertise my now open commissions !!!
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ reach out via private message or my ko-fi ☆.。.:*
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
° 100 words = $1
° i will write —
noncon / dubcon ; mindbreak ; light self harm / light mentions of blood / suicidal ideation ; stockholm syndrome ; chubby / plus sized reader ; specific insecurities ; specific mental illnesses
° will not write
scat ; ddlg ; omegaverse ; OCs ; vore ; animal variations ; femdom ; actual suicide ; discrimination ; male reader
° ask if unsure!!!! ^_^
° waiting time depends on word count & material requested :-)
refunds will only be issued if i express that i feel i cannot meet the expectations of the request qualitatively or physically.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
regular requests are open too!!
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springsmile · 10 months
Text
me 😻
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springsmile · 11 months
Text
over my shoulder
yan. shinso x reader | series masterlist | 18+
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descr: with extreme and debilitating anxiety that has led to your desensitization, you think you're privy to feeling out danger before it strikes you. you're wrong.
<alt text: ( stalker!shinso )>
warnings: non-con, smut, pre-established trauma (r*pe), extreme anxiety/paranoia, victim blaming/shaming, abuse of prescriptions, self harm, suicidal ideation, disassociation, negativity around hospitalization, violent intrusive thoughts, kidnapping, murder, specific reader characterizations, manipulation, anorexia/bulimia allusions
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note 01: sooo this is largely based upon my own trauma and mental framework. it's a really really dark depiction. it might dampen your mood, but i promise it's a good read :) ! please make sure to examine the warning tags closely.
02**: reader's quirk is enhanced senses. upon activation, emotions and sensations are pretty much exacerbated. reader never learns how to channel or control it to its full potential, only to turn it on and off.
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˗ˋˏ CHAPTER LIST ˎˊ˗
01. VICTIMHOOD
02. HABITUAL
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springsmile · 1 year
Text
thinkin abt needy yan bokuto who takes ur virginity for the first time
bokuto who roughly possesses you— takes your jaw into his hand and (with a bruising vigor) presses his lips to yours. there’s a momentary dink of your teeth meeting, before his tongue is acquainting itself with yours. slick and warm, mapping the expanse of your mouth.
your protests muffled—your head is immobilized but trembling with the effort to shake your head, recoil.
“cmon baby, wanna make you feel good.” he’s pleading, the sound floating into your mouth and you’re choking on its sheer saccharinity.
“you want this, i know you do.” your inner thighs are pulsing at the cupping of his impressive torso. it’s a hamstring stretch in itself. even worse, his fingers maneuver around the dampened lace of your panties and tug them aside. they’re sticking to the side of your labia, and the sensation has you responding viscerally.
his next movement is unceremonious. his thick and coarse fingers plunge inside of you— the pads kissing the sides of your walls, and nicking that spot—your eyes bulge, mouth glistening and agape in a soundless cry.
“see? look how wet you are.”
if you had the capacity, you’d be gritting your teeth, but your only outright means of defiance was a breathy gasp, “b-bokuto, stop.”
he pulls back from the countless open-mouthed love bites he’d carefully worked into your neck (glowing red, incomplete circles, shining beautifully), and tilts his head.
“but i don’t want to.”
it doesn’t sound malicious. it doesn’t even look like it. but it’s petulantly dangerous. more so, he wants something, and what he wants is wrapped up in his hands. he has unparalleled strength to covet it, so it’s his. you’re not going anywhere.
he can’t even understand why you’re begging him to stop.
the tempo is incomprehensible, absolutely nonsensical. you hope his fingers cramp—the strokes keep evolving. shallow, quick, slow, deep and curled. bokuto presses his lips to your ear, so warm and wet, the same stimulus expressed by every inch of your skin. he’s panting, mewling like it’s you who’s torturing him.
“please, please let me eat you out, princess. god, please. i need it.” he’s near whimpering. it’s downright pathetic. “we’ll feel so good. i swear, i swear baby. please.”
you can’t even breathe.
his head is lowering to that precious, sensitive space between your thighs, lips closing around your nervous nub. your hands leap to his hair, fistfuls gathered in each, and you’re pulling. you can’t figure out if you’re pushing him away or keeping him in place. his tongue scales the side of your clit, and with hollowed cheeks, he suckles tightly. air-tight, and pulsating under the muscle.
callouses are petting your sides, his fingers twitching as they reach the valley of your breasts, before climbing to your nipples. he’s pinching tightly, rolling them between his forefingers and thumbs with a passion akin to the same extended to your cunt.
a strangled gasp scratches your throat, you’re vibrating at the stimulation, and as soon as he releases the bud with a reverberating pop!, something so balmy and intense rips open at the pit of your stomach. chest heaving, you ride the high with fabric-clad fists.
he’s still slurping, varying between tantalizing kitten-licking to full on fucking you on his tongue. every part of bokuto was fucking jacked and graced by boggling strength, the bruises left on your tits and your thighs weren’t as jarring as the force behind each thrust of his tongue.
his head retreats unexpectedly, and you’re fervently grappling at this moment of reprieve— but before you can suck in much needed mouthfuls of air, he’s pressing his sticky tip to your hole. precum and your slick smears and trickles onto the sheets, yielding a sickening solution of lust. its warmth intermingles with that of your sweat, frigid with dread, leaving your skin crawling and begging to be satiated more than before.
you jerk, fear tightening your joints as your eyes snap open, “n-no, wait!”
your hips creak under his grip, and when your gaze languidly meets his, you’re resigned, blinking back tears of desperation. he’s not humping your leg all needy and pleading anymore. he’s not entertaining your begs or pleas of yield. he’s not begging or pleading with you anymore, either. he’s gonna take you. but don’t worry!! he’ll make you feel real good <3
844 notes · View notes