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#*sighs* the quality is just as bad isn't it
finzphoenix · 7 months
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Trying something new for Patreon: 20-minute videos of whatever WIP I'm currently working on! ^_^
Gosh, I hate advertising my own Patreon account, I'm so sorry for spaming about it! ;w;
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doctorweebmd · 1 year
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i have been experiencing The Agonies with some increasing frequency over the past month and at least TRYING to put in The Work to keep myself mostly functional and human which is great and all but now since I’m Managing the overwhelming guilt of Not Managing Enough is quite stifling. Like i feel ok enough to be guilty about not feeling more okay does that make sense 
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starlightxsvt · 7 months
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Sentinel's Serenade | c.sc
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pairing ➳ bodyguard!Scoups x heiress!reader
genre ➳ drama, angst, romance, smut.
word count ➳ 29.5k (i'm sorry)
warnings ➳ car crash, ptsd, flashbacks of war, panic attack, murder, violence, guns, blood, death, fingering, unprotected sex, edging, female oral, arguments, coups is an a-hole but he has reasons, he was also in the military, Jun is a bad guy here(im sorry), jihoon blesses us with his special appearance.
synopsis ➳ As you start digging up an accident that has been brushed under the rug, you make an enemy who is out to get you no matter what. Amidst all the chaos you develop feelings for your bodyguard who has built walls of steel around him.
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"This is your new bodyguard, Seungcheol." 
Your head tilts upward, as you scan the man standing in front of you with careful eyes. He's tall and broad; exactly how you'd imagine a bodyguard to be, along with an emptiness in his eyes, so cold and robotic that would only be achievable after being through some heavy shit, you assume. Your father continues listing off his certifications and qualities but your brain doesn't capture much after hearing that he can speak sign language and is an ex navy SEAL; too busy getting distracted with his handsome features and dissecting him as much as you can just from looking.
The man isn't handsome in the typical sense, definitely not the handsome you're used to seeing in magazine covers and charity galas. No, he's ruggedly handsome, shielding himself with a tough exterior, his thick brows knotted in a frown and his full, red lips set in a grim line, blond hair brushed back neatly. 
With the way he looks in that expensive suit hugging his body, he could pass as a business tycoon but his aura is completely different; alert, strict, impenetrable.
His hand reaches out for yours to meet in a handshake after your father is done introducing him. You watch his extended hand for a while, observing little scratches and cuts that seem to still be healing on his knuckles before meeting his hand. As expected, his palms are calloused but cool. His grip is firm, just like the look in his dark eyes and for some unknown reason tingles shoot down your spine.
"Choi Seungcheol, ma'am." His voice has a deep timbre to it. It'd be perfect for audiobooks, you muse idly.  "He is to be with you whenever you are going outside till the foreseeable future." Your father states. There isn't much room for arguments here and you aren't too bothered having a shadow because this isn't the first time. 
You had a personal bodyguard six months ago and the man sustained a serious hip injury due to...circumstances involving you. Now that you are back and ready to face the world, you know that keeping a personal bodyguard is a wise decision, even if your father may have assigned him with ulterior motives. 
It's okay, the games are just beginning and you are playing for the long haul.
"Met your new guard on the way. Guy's a robot." Chan says as he strolls into the library with his hands in his pockets. You assume he's talking about Seungcheol, who is currently stationed outside the library room even though you told him to take a break.
A copy of Jane Eyre sits open on your lap as you look up to meet Chan's eyes. Offering him a small smile, you motion him to sit next to you. Your younger brother had been out of the country due to business for the past few weeks so it has been a while since you last saw him.
"So you are really going back to work?" He asks, a soft, concerning note to his voice as he sits down next to you on the divan. You sigh and give him an exasperated look. 
"I'm more than ready. Sitting idle hasn't done me much good." You sign. 
His eyes watch the movements of your hands before he murmurs, "It will be tough, you know... without your... voice. I don't want you to get into any trouble, especially after everything."
"I'll manage." You sign. You will. 
It has been six long months since the accident. Six months since you lost your mother. Six months since you have last uttered a word. Six months since you have been at work.
Six months since your life has completely been turned upside down. 
You have been thrown entirely off track, the reigns of your horse being snatched away by a dark force plotting far worse things.  But you will uncover them. No matter how long or what it takes. 
"Dad thinks you're not ready yet," Chan comments, breaking your train of thought. 
You huff out an annoyed breath. 
"I don't really care what he thinks you know," you sign and your brother snorts, looking at you with a fond, amused expression. "It will be hard." He says absent-mindedly. "To adjust back to everything."
You nod because you know it will be. You have already heard the board members express their dissatisfaction over you returning as the CEO. Lee publishing has been in its prime since last year and they're afraid it's gonna lose its position with a mute CEO. Funny how they forget you are the one who brought it to where it is today. Lee Publishings, your family's publishing company was handed over to you by your  grandfather. He started it from scratch and it became the first successful family business before he decided to hand it over to you when you became twenty. 
Your bond with your grandfather was always special, maybe because you both shared the same love for books and sense of humour. You grew up watching him read and collect books and naturally you picked up on that habit. As you grew up you watched him work closely, helping him wherever you could with the company which led him to hand it over to you. 
Not your father, your brother or any of your cousins but you.
He was lucky enough to watch you take on the role and make the company flourish for all three months before he passed away peacefully one night in his sleep. 
The feud began after that as your uncle, Jin Lee and your father started expressing their concerns, saying that you wouldn't be able to rule over the company well now that your grandfather wasn't here to guide you. While your uncle wanted the publishing house for himself and his useless son, Jun, your father wanted to hand the company over to Chan, believing that your brother would be a better president, and offering you the role of the vice president instead. It came to you without any surprise because your brother was always your father's favourite child.
You, however, had stood your ground and promptly refused, challenging them to try and take it from you. Thankfully, your brother was on your side, saying that it rightfully belonged to you and you were more than eligible to rule over it. Chan's disinterest may have backed off your father temporarily, you can tell, but your uncle is still desperate, now more than ever.
"You are going to move back to your place soon as well," Chan complains with a pout, breaking your train of thought. Giving him a sad smile you open your arms, inviting him for a hug which he gladly accepts. After one week of staying at the hospital and your mother's burial, you decided that you would stay at the mansion you grew up in, essentially your father's house, instead of your own apartment in the city, for the foreseeable future. This mansion held a lot of memories for you, especially with your mother. Breakfast in the garden, late night talks in the huge library and sipping on tea while watching the sunset together through the large window in the west wing.
You could never imagine a life without your mother yet here you are, living one. But it is time you slowly start going back to where you belong.
"It will be lonely here without you…and mom," Chan whispers.
You can only blink back your tears and hug him tighter.
Just on your fifth day back, you realise that things are not going to be anywhere near easy for you, not that you expected, but still.
The moment you get to work on Wednesday morning, there is a commotion outside the main entrance of the building which leads your driver to drop you and Seungcheol at the underground entrance. You are greeted by the bleak face of your secretary as you walk to your office, who announces that the vice president is there to see you. Once you enter your office, you indeed find vice president Jun, your dear cousin, sitting on your seat with the face of a cat who ate the canary.
Seungcheol, who is always trailing behind you like a shadow, moves— to drag him out of your seat no doubt, but you raise your hand as a gesture to tell him to stop.
"Good morning, Miss Lee. Though it doesn't look like a good morning for you," He grins, standing up and rounding the desk lazily while tilting his chin at the coffee table where the morning paper is lying. You pick it up and in bold letters on the front page, the headline greets you with: "President of Lee Publishings Accused of Employee Mistreatment."
It goes on and on about some bullshit of how you have been treating employees badly and holding their salary because you have apparently returned with a nasty temper as you can't speak anymore. You can't help but scoff, because the reality is far, far from what the paper says. 
Ever since you've been back at work, all you've ever done is stay inside your office and go through all the pending documents and close deals that were hanging. Your only human contact has been your secretary Hansol and your bodyguard, both of whom have more similarities to a wall than a human. Your previously bubbly secretary has turned awkward now, probably because you have lost your voice and holding a conversation with you proves to be hard. Seungcheol, on the other hand, is like a robot who stands by your door all day and only answers your questions as briefly as possible, most of the time with a yes or no.
Your hands form fists at your sides as you glare at Jun, who stands there, pridefully evil, watching you with a satisfied grin on his face. "Things are looking rather bleak for you," He tuts in mock sympathy as he strolls towards you, hands in his pockets. As he comes to stand right next to you, his hand reaches out for your shoulder to pat you but Seungcheol grabs his wrist and twists it, making him shriek in pain. 
"Fuck! Let go, you asshole!"
"You do not have permission to touch her," Seungcheol calmly states, still not letting go. You sigh and sign Seungcheol to kick him out, which he does immediately while your cousin screams in protest as you walk to your desk and sit down, rubbing your temples in frustration.
"Is there anything I can do for you?" Seungcheol asks after closing the door behind him.
You watch him for a while, your mind running a mile a minute as you think of a thousand ways of payback. But then you remind yourself that you have to approach this calmly.  So you force a smile and sign. 
"Send my secretary in. —
A couple of days later, you are not pleasantly surprised to see your father waiting to greet you at the front of the house when you return from work.
Just as Seungcheol opens the car door for you to get out, your father marches towards you.
"What did you do, girl? I told you to stay put! Your uncle Jin is here to see you!" His tone is not friendly. In fact, you pick up heavy disappointment, which you expected. This was bound to happen after you fired your cousin Jun from his position today. 
You smile calmly at him before turning to Seungcheol and signalling to him that he is relieved of his duties. He looks at you warily and you have a feeling he wants to say no but he ultimately just nods and takes his leave, driving away the car to park.
"He's waiting for you in the backyard." Your father announces. As you start walking away he yells, "You better fix what you have done today! The company won't last if you keep on making hasty decisions like these!"
Deciding to ignore him you walk to the backyard with unfaltering steps and find your uncle standing there with arms crossed, feet tapping furiously. You approach him with a smile, not a friendly one but the subtle smile of challenge as he takes furious steps towards you when he sees you coming.
"You! What have you done, _____? You fired my son from his position!" He hollers, marching to stand in front of you, fury blazing vividly in his eyes. 
Silently, you hold eye contact with him.
"You think you can do as you please after you get into an accident and we'll just let you? Who do you think you are to fire my son?"
You smirk before producing your notepad from your bag and start scribbling.
"I'm the president of the company and based on our investigation your son was found guilty of spreading fake news about me mistreating my employees. The reporter who got paid to write it confessed himself."
You hold out the notepad for him to read.
"How dare you believe a lowly reporter over my son? Over your own cousin?" Your uncle is livid. "If you keep behaving like this then I'll retract all my assets shared with your father. You know I can take over the Lee Enterprises anytime if I want."
You roll your eyes. Yeah, do whatever you want.
You start writing down. "If you have nothing productive to say I suggest you leave now and have a chat with your precious son. I have had a long day."
As soon as he reads the words written on the paper he bats the notebook away from your hand, making you gasp. The look in his eyes is akin to a madman's as he takes a threatening step towards you and leans in to whisper in your ear. 
"If you don't want to end up like your mother I suggest you start behaving, ______." He sneers.
Your whole body freezes up like a block of ice as your breath catches in your lungs. Your uncle's eyes are cruel, threating, filled with a layer of secrets that you're desperate to uncover as he takes a step back. The look of panic on your face brings satisfaction to him as watches you for a few moments, letting his words sink in and challenging you to do something about it before he smirks and walks out of the backyard.
Your legs, which have been shaky until now finally give up and you fall on the perfectly trimmed grass, your breaths coming out in the form of pants. 
The horrible realisation sinks into you. 
Your suspicions were true. 
His words just confirmed that which means you need to up your game. Immediately.
You're surprised at how quickly, how easily you think of one person when you need someone to help you. 
Hands shaky, you type a message to Seungcheol.
— There's something different about Seungcheol the moment he arrives at your front gate in his BMW. As you watch him get out of the car and jog towards you, you realise it's his fit; he's not wearing his typical two piece suit. 
No, he's dressed in a fitted white polo and black slacks, the polo so tight that you can see the bulging outline of his chest and arms. Despite the negative thoughts brewing in your head you get distracted for a second as you ogle him unashamedly and take longer than you should to respond to his question. "Are you alright, ma'am? I wasn't expecting you to call so late."
You roll your eyes. It's only like eight in the evening. Though you can see why it was unexpected for him because he is relieved from duty as you get off work in the evening. Not replying to him, you tilt your head towards his car, indicating to him to open the passenger side door. He looks doubtful for a second before following your instructions.
"Where would you like me to take you?" Seungcheol asks once you're both inside the car and he has started the engine. You sigh and sign, "Somewhere far and quiet."
His thick brows knot into a frown as he thinks for a few seconds before simply nodding. Then, surprising you, he reaches over and pulls your seatbelt across your chest, which you just realised you forgot to put on. His being so close lets you get a really good sniff of his cologne and once again you get heavily distracted as you start wondering what he'd do if you leaned into his neck and wrapped your arms around him.
Where are these thoughts coming from? 
You have no idea. This is not the first time you've had them, though.
It is like this new disease you have caught. Your mind goes haywire whenever you look at Seungcheol for a second too long. The first time it happened was right after the rumour of employee mistreatment broke out and you were leaving from work. Even though you took the back exit through the underground parking, the press mobbed you, throwing a string of questions at you while their cameras kept flashing repeatedly.
Seungcheol, of course, managed everything very efficiently and got you away safely. The way his hand squeezed your shoulder, his face hovering near yours while he asked if you were okay was a feeling that has managed to stay with you very vividly even now. You were a bit spaced out but not for the reasons he was thinking; it was just that he looked too attractive and his touch felt too comforting, even though he was merely doing his job.
You are a tiny bit ashamed to admit that he has made your heart flutter since then, with every little thing he did. 
You don't get to dwell on your day dreams for too long because he's leaning back in his seat and pressing the accelerator, making you jerk softly.
A quiet thirty minutes of drive later you discover that Seungcheol has taken you to the beach right on the outskirts of the city. It isn't something you were expecting but you realise it is something you definitely need. 
As he parks the car on a small cliff overlooking the entire beach, you hear the soothing sounds of the wave crashing into the shore clearly. 
And it brings back vague memories of your childhood, when your mother took you to this beach because she loved the air here so much. As if in a trance, you get out of the car and stand by the cliff, letting the cool sea breeze wash over you as the salty smell in the air invades your nose. Your bodyguard stands by you silently for a while and without looking, you can tell that his eyes are on you, watching you carefully.
Sometime later, he breaks the peaceful silence, "Would like to eat something? There are a few food trucks nearby." He moves his head to motion at the food trucks parked far away, their lights blinking. Shaking your head no, you fill your lungs with the cool night air by taking one more deep breath before moving to the back of the car and leaning against the trunk. Seungcheol follows you as you pat the space next to you for him to come and stand. 
He does so and you let out a heavy breath before signing. "I need you to do something for me. Something that has to remain a secret."
Seungcheol raises his brows slightly before frowning. He doesn't reply immediately and you stand upright, holding eye contact with him. "It is very important to me, Seungcheol. I need to know if I can trust you to keep it a secret from everyone," you sign.
"Okay, ma'am." He finally responds. 
"Even from my father," you sign. "I know you're working for him but for this task, I will pay you separately so you will only answer to me about this, okay?"
"Okay ma'am."
"Good." You huff out a breath. "You are from a prominent security company, right? I need you to look into a man for me. Jin Lee."
"Your uncle?" He looks bewildered. "Yes. I need his whereabouts on 23rd March of this year. And I need to know who he contacted before this accident. Any call or bank transfer that seems remotely out of place, you look into it for me, okay?" He pauses for a breath before replying. "Okay, ma'am."
"Just call me ____, Seungcheol."
— On the weekend, you have lunch with Chan in the garden of the mansion, the place where you two had lunch with your mother, as he eagerly asks you about how you have been doing and assures you that he is here if you need anything. After lunch, you see him off for a meeting before aimlessly strolling through the hallways of your house by yourself.
The cleanup at your place has been completed so you are planning on moving back tomorrow and you realise it will be a while before you come back here. Through your walk, you come across a painting hanging on the large hallway towards your father's office that makes you stop to stare. 
It is a picture of your mother with you and Chan, taken when you were about twelve years old. It is your favourite picture in the entire house, maybe because you have a memory attached to it or maybe because it's simply magnificent, the three of your smiles shining so brightly.
It was a gift from your grandfather to your mother on her thirty seventh birthday and she had it hung here, right in front of a large set of windows that overlooks the garden. The afternoon sun falls right on the picture, casting it in an ethereal glow and it is almost like your mom is here, cheering you on with her beautiful smile.
With a soft sigh and tears withheld, you say goodbye to the picture and walk away. You are aiming to go straight to your room but the loud voices coming from your father's office makes you stop.
You realise the door is just slightly opened and you walk over to shut it but stop in your tracks when you hear your uncle's voice.
"You better get your daughter under control or it will not be good for you!" He is shouting.
"Are you threatening me?"
"I am warning you, brother."
"Jin, please, just let her be for a while. She has lost her voice. I am sure she will not be able to perform like before. Then you and the board can fire her."
You are somewhat hurt by your father's words but once again, they do not come to you as a surprise. "Exactly! Why should I let the company go to waste because of her poor performance? You tell her to fuck off or I will remove her myself!"
"Jin, please. You already got rid of Aileen. You do not have to go any further.
Your world has come to a stop.
You forget to breath, as you simply stand there, stunned, convinced that you heard wrong.
You had to have heard wrong.
"I got rid of her and I'll get rid of you too, if you don't listen to me! Don't forget I own the shares of the family hotel just as much as you do. It will not be a challenge to turn the board of directors against you. Imagine what will happen after that? Your most lucrative business will be completely mine and your dear son will become penniless."
There is no reply from your father. Or maybe there is but you do not hear it.
There is a deafening ring in yours ears as you muffle your sobs by clutching your mouth tightly and making a beeline for your room.
You cannot believe this. You absolutely can not. It is something you could not have imagined even in your wildest nightmare. Your father knows your uncle killed your mom, yet he is staying silent. Why? Why!
Granted, your parents were never happily married and growing up you have heard that your father has mistresses. It never bothered your mother because their marriage was only a business agreement in the very first place and she had all her attention focused on you and Chan. But to think that he is letting her killer walk free is unbelievable.
After all he lived with her, his wife, the mother of his children for so many goddamn years!
By the time you have entered your room, you are full on crying, ugly and loud. Tears are blurring your vision as you flail around the room, helplessly, aimlessly, devastatedly. 
And before you know it, you are throwing the thousand dollar porcelain vase by your bedside to the ground.
The piece shatters into bits and the sound oddly satisfies you, prompting you to throw another one. And for the next few minutes you throw anything you can find in your room, not caring how valuable they are, not caring that a shard of glass has ripped the skin below your left thumb, making you bleed.
"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck you! Fuck all of you!" You yell at the top of your lungs, not caring to keep up the facade anymore.
Once you have run out of energy, you stop to look at the mess you made, glad that the messy room and the pain from the cut on your hand makes your mind go blank for a while.
But you do not miss the small, almost inaudible creak of the door to your room. Your head whips into the direction to see none other than Seungcheol, standing right out front, his eyes wide and his lips parted in a small gasp of surprise. 
You forget to breathe as you realise he might have been standing there for a while and he witnessed everything. 
Everything.
He knows your secret.  He knows that you are not mute. Before you know it, your feet are moving as you push open the door and yank your bodyguard into your room, not before glancing left and right down the hallway to check anyone's presence.
As soon as you lock the door, you press him against it and lean on your tiptoes, inching your face closer to him as you whisper, "Keep. This. A. Secret."
You had meant for the words to come out threatening but your tear stained eyes and cracking voice doesn't help establish that image.
Seungcheol stares at you with a gaze you are quite unable to decipher. His eyes are soft, full of wonder and you think you can almost spot admiration and something more in them and for a moment, you find yourself lost in the sea of his gaze. 
"______". He calls your name softly. His hands come to your upper arms to hold you gently as he puts some distance between the two of you before ushering you towards your bed and making you sit down. "Your secret is safe with me," he confirms as he sits next to you. "But I am glad you can speak again." He murmurs, giving your shoulder a soft squeeze as he looks around the room you just trashed.
You let out half a sigh of relief, knowing that your secret is safe and you find yourself speaking before you can even think. "I got my voice back quite a while ago. Two months after the accident, actually." Seungcheol's head whips towards you, his eyes widening in surprise.
"My uncle seemed very happy when I lost my voice and he was being weirdly nice to me. I already had my suspicions that the accident was an inside job so I pretended to act mute." You whisper, eyes trained on the floor.
How right you were!
It was an inside job but it had its roots spread out much farther than you thought. Your uncle killed your mother while your father sits there in silence despite knowing that!
The thought makes you shake your head as a dry, mirthless laughter wrings out of your throat. Your head falls back as you laugh like a mad woman as Seungcheol watches you, absolutely perplexed.
He gently tries calling your name. "______—"
"My father knew!" You are yelling between laughter. "He fucking knew!"
The poor man only looks more confused.
"He knew— he… he knows my uncle killed my mom but he is staying silent! He said it himself! I heard him! Do you understand, Seungcheol, my father is turning a blind eye! He is choosing to save his fucking business over me, over his children!"
Seungcheol looks absolutely baffled upon hearing your words as he falls silent with a bleak expression. He does not have the adequate words to respond to that and he simply does not know what he can do at this point to make you feel better.  However, he takes notice of the cut below your thumb and reaches for your hand, setting it down on his thigh while he takes out a handkerchief and gently ties it around the injury. "You hurt yourself," he states quietly, almost to himself before meeting your eyes. "I know what you heard was painful but you need to take care of yourself. For your mother, at least."
And the damn breaks.
You break into a full on sob as you wrap your hands around his large shoulders, molding yourself against him as you cry unceremoniously in his chest. Seungcheol's arms wrap around your body in an effortless blanket of security as he rests his chin on top of your head and strokes your head while you try to burrow yourself deeper into his chest. 
It takes a while for the messy array of tears to subside and once you have calmed down a little, you take notice of his white shirt which is now completely wet where you rested your face. "I'm sorry," you croak weakly, trying to pull away but he holds you by the arms and makes you face him by tilting your chin with his finger.
"There is nothing to be sorry for, okay? Now tell me what I can do to make this a little better. Just so you know, my team is almost done digging up about your uncle. We should have a solid update tomorrow."
A small sob of gratitude and relief escapes your throat and Seungcheol immediately shushes you, his eyes helplessly searching for yours. "C-can you please ask them to look into my dad as well," you hiccup, saying the words you never imagined would come out of your mouth. "I need to know his whereabouts before the accident."
Seungcheol assures you with a nod while his hand strokes your back soothingly. Exhaling a loud, defeated sigh, you wipe your tears and mutter. "Please help me pack my bags, Seungcheol. I am moving back to my place. Tonight. I cannot stay here a second longer."
The man looks like he wants to protest but goes against it and simply nods, getting up to retrieve your bags from your closet.
After hastily packing your belongings you waste no time to march out of the house with Seungcheol trailing behind you. You leave a note on the kitchen, simply saying something came up and you had to leave early.
You are extremely grateful that you do not come across your father because one look at him and the ticking time bomb inside you would explode and you definitely cause a scene.
As the night grows deeper slowly, you isolate yourself in your room once you come back to your apartment. Despite Seungcheol's insistence, you tell him to call it a day and lock yourself up in your room, throwing yourself a pity party. It has been a while since you had such a restless night— the last one being after the accident, and it takes a long long time for sleep to come.
When your eyes finally fall shut, hues of orange and blue have already grazed the sky. 
You do not feel like your best self in the morning but the news Seungcheol brings is enough to get you back on track. 
The manila file sitting on your desk is a gold mine, it's contents spread throughout the surface as you sit in silence, hands linked together under your chin, your brain finally connecting the pieces together.
Seungcheol's friends found a shady bank transfer made by your uncle, two weeks before the accident. The tip led them to an old gang who, after applying some tactics, admitted to taking money from Jin Lee in order to commit a hit and run. After digging around some more they found papers that now lie on your table, a clear proof of your uncle's deal with the gang, which they kept as insurance. Among the documents, one particularly catches your eye.
It is the information of the driver of the truck that hit your car. 
The picture is like a jolt of electricity through your system as you are immediately taken back to the scene of the crash, the moments after where you were hovering over the brink of consciousness. You remember seeing a man peeking into your wrecked car, a man with a scar on his left cheek and all this time you could not fully believe that to be real.
But it was.  You did not imagine it. The picture on the document is that of the driver you saw that morning, the man with a scar on his left cheek, his eyes dark and blank, his lips twisted in a line of malice.
"_____?" Seungcheol's gentle voice guides you out of your head. "My friend had his confession recorded. Would you like to hear it?"
"Of course."
"I need to warn you…it is pretty detailed. About the accident, you know." He looks guilty, even though he has no reason to be.
You swallow a lump in your throat as your heart beat picks up. Are you really ready to revisit that morning? Relive all those feelings?
You have to.
Seungcheol pushes a voice recorder towards you on the table, pressing a button to turn it on.
"I was told that there would be only a girl and her bodyguard in the car! I swear I didn't know her mother would be there as well! I did not mean to kill the woman! After I hit the car, I went to check and…and the older woman was dead! The girl looked barely alive and I didn't think she would survive…."
There is a buzzing sound in your ears. It is deafening.
You are transported to a void where these words keep repeating and repeating, pulling you down, sucking you deeper into a pit of despair.  It hurts so much you are sure death would be easier.
Your head hangs low, silent tears trailing down your cheek as you stare at your lap. Seungcheol calls your name multiple times, asking if you are okay but you cannot bring yourself to form a reply.
The pain, the guilt, the shame, the anger— everything is overwhelming. These feelings consume you whole and dry you out until you are left with an unbelievable urge to scream and holler and cry. 
"______, please, can you hear me?" Seungcheol's touch on your shoulder makes you jolt. You look up to find him standing next to you, eyes glazed with concern as he peers down at you.
"I am fine," you reply after taking a shaky breath.
"Are you sure? Maybe you should call it day—"
"Seungcheol?" You interrupt him. You wipe the tears clean and sit up straight. "Can you call my lawyer? I need him here as soon as possible."
Bad news awaits you the next day when you return home from work. 
As usual Seungcheol walks you to the door of your apartment but you realise something is up when he abruptly stops after stepping out of the elevator and turning towards the door to your place. Following his line of sight you realise he has taken notice of the slightly open front door to your house. 
Your heart drops as a small gasp leaves your lips.
Someone broke into your place. And it does not take a genius to guess who Plus it also confirms that your uncle has found out you have been snooping around. A calm man like him does not make a move unless things are really dire and this proves that he is desperate to get that evidence out of your hands.
Seungcheol tenses up beside you and uses a hand to push you behind his body in a protective manner as he steps closer to the door. With the other hand he pulls out his revolver, holding it out and pointing it straight.
"S-Seungcheol—" You start panicking.
He shushes you before you can say much, eyes trained forward as he takes measured steps. Swallowing the bubble of fear, you hold his back as you follow him into your apartment. 
The storeroom which is right on the left after entering is the first place Seungcheol checks, and when he finds it clear he pushes you inside haphazardly.
"Don't come out until I get you." He commands, shutting the door on your face and clicking the lock before you can even process anything. Baffled, you stand still inside the dimly lit room, carefully listening for any sounds, while a thousand different thoughts run through your head.  This building is one of the most secure residential buildings in the city and breaking in here is quite literally impossible. Which means it is clear your uncle bribed someone on the inside and the realisation of how scary things are getting dawns on you, making you chew nervously on your lower lip as you start to grow restless.
Thankfully, a quick while later Seungcheol opens the door, a wary look on his face and you can immediately tell something is wrong. As soon as the door opens, you push past him and head for your bedroom, only to find the place absolutely trashed. Everything is a mess; from your bed to your closet to your dresser and it is evident that someone took their sweet time to comb through every one of your possessions and as you take in the havoc, the last of your doubts go away.
They were undoubtedly looking for the documents and the recorder. 
Your hands fist at your sides as tears of anger and frustration gather at the corners of your eyes. It only amplifies when you see one of your most precious belongings lying face down on the floor— a picture of you and your mother taken on your eighteenth birthday. 
Immediately you kneel and pick the frame up only to find it broken, making you heave out a helpless cry of anger. As you clutch it to your chest, your eyes scan the mess around you and a sense of doom settles in your gut. So this is what your life has come to now.
"Come. You're not staying here." Seungcheol's quiet command disrupts your thoughts.
"W-what? What do you mean? Where am I gonna go?" You scramble to stand up.
"At my place. This place isn't safe, _____." He pins you down with a serious look. "Pack your essentials and I mean absolute essentials. Your passport and any important papers."
"Wait, I—"
"Now." He commands. "I am gonna make some calls to find out who did this. Be ready in ten." He is walking out of the room while dialling a number, leaving you flabbergasted.
A while later you sit on the passenger's seat next to Seungcheol as he pulls the car out of your underground parking and onto the busy street, eyes focused on the road in silence. The only sound surrounding you is the sound of the bustling city and it isn't enough to ease the thick tension in the car. Seungcheol's jaw is clenched and his lips are pressed into a thin line as you observe him while he stares straight ahead. "What do we do after going to your place? I can't just hide forever." You break the silence with your words, your eyes trained out the window. It looks like it's going to rain.
"You'll stay in my place until the threat is removed. I'll soon receive the CCTV footage and from there on we can track down who ordered to invade your home." He declares.
"It was my uncle." You say without much thought.
Seungcheol turns to look at you for a beat before focusing on the road again. "You sound sure." He murmurs.
"Who else would it be then? He is after the evidence." You reply. Seungcheol remains silent for a beat before agreeing with a hum. Another silence follows after that. You take occasional, shy glances at him while he drives and when the car stops at a red light in an intersection, you call for him, making him turn his head to look at you. "Seungcheol?"
"Hmm?"
"Thank you. For today."
He stares at you quietly, not blinking. "I just did my job."
"No, you are doing a lot more. You are helping me out in so many ways and I can only keep myself together thanks to you."
He only stares more at you. His gaze is intense and his eyes are hypnotic; if you stare too long it unnerves you, dissects you open. "You will be fine, _____." He replies after a long pause. "With or without me."
His words trigger you. 
With or without me?
You want to yell that he has to stick around however long you want him to but his cold demeanour makes your thoughts appear silly, even to yourself.  You are clearly looking for something more, much more than he wants to give you.  You know he would probably burn the world for you, not because he loves you but because he is a loyal person and probably because he pities you. 
Just a little bit. And you accept that. — Seungcheol's place is a canvas of grey and black and white. It is minimalistic and clean, a one bedroom apartment on the tenth floor in a quieter part of the city. As he walks you through his humble abode, he gives directions on where everything is and finally opens the door to his bedroom, leading you in before announcing. "You take the bed. I'll sleep on the sofa."
You do not protest because you know he would never listen. Instead, you almost ask him to share the bed with you but prevent going with it because you cannot trust yourself to remain professional while he sleeps so close to you with that tempting body of his.
"I'll leave you to rest. I'm going for a grocery run. Do not open the door for anyone but me. If there is any problem, call me." He uses his no nonsense tone and you fight the urge to roll your eyes. 
"Okay, okay." You watch him leave before shutting the bedroom door and sitting down on the floor, letting out a deep breath, one you've been unconsciously holding for a while.
As you watch the orange sky from the large window of Seungcheol's bedroom, the events of the last forty eight hours wash over you. You can't help but admire yourself at how calm you are. You woke up feeling numb today and you've been functioning on autopilot the whole day. Seeing your place ransacked did evoke some emotion within you but then again, deep down you were expecting something like this to happen once you had the evidence. 
You're running on pure adrenaline and you know you cannot stop until you have put your dear uncle behind bars. 
And maybe, even your father. 
He's an accomplice, no? He knows very well who killed his wife yet he decides to keep quiet, which makes him more vile to you. You find more hatred towards your father brimming within you, than towards your uncle. Yes, you expected him to play unfair but your own father knowing the culprit of your mother's death and simply burying it under the rug?  That, you absolutely cannot tolerate. 
A number of different scenarios run through your head on how you can bring them down. Despite having this irresistible urge to just run to the police with the recorder, you remember your lawyer's words.
It won't be enough. 
A few documents and a tape of confession are not enough to bring a man like Jin down. He has very strong connections with law enforcement and an even stronger set of lawyers. You need a solid witness. You need to catch him red handed. You need to create a scandal he can't recover from. You need to gather more proof. Proof so irrefutable, that his entire empire comes crashing down. 
And good for you, your uncle has already started setting up his doom. Trashing your place was his first mistake, the first piece of the domino. Now, it is a matter of time until everything collapses. You pray he will keep on making more mistakes. 
In fact, you know he will. He will do anything to get his hands on the evidence and you will stack all his actions against him at court. And when the time comes for the nail to hit the head…
You're going to be the bait. —
Somewhere in the middle of the night, you wake up from your sleep. Falling asleep came to you easily after eating the dinner Seungcheol cooked and then curling up in his bed where the sheets smelled subtly like him. It led you to have the best sleep you had in a while but now that you are awake, there is an itch in your throat, making it dry. 
So, quietly, you get up from bed and walk to the kitchen, a small light in the hallway guiding you to find a glass and pour yourself some water. 
As you sit on one of the breakfast stools and gulp it down, you watch Seungcheol sleeping on the sofa. The blanket that was probably on top of him once has fallen on the floor, the small space clearly not sufficient for his large frame as almost half of his body hangs out of the sofa. You almost feel bad for him and wonder how he can sleep in such a tiny space but it is pointless to feel guilty. He would never take the bed, no matter how much you offered.
As you take the last few sips of your water, you catch the moonlight draping over half of his face, casting it in an ethereal glow. It's stunning how beautiful he is. His usual stoic face is now relaxed, his full brows not knotted in a frown, his long eyelashes resting against his cheek, his plump full lips parted just a tiny bit. 
Unashamedly, for the nth time, you find yourself wondering how it'd be like to kiss him. You can't remember the last time a man made you feel like this, if ever. Your relationship with him should be strictly professional yet as you spend more time with him your mind keeps on entering forbidden territories.  Which is sad because you know he feels nowhere near that for you. Maybe he even has a girlfriend, or a wife— though you see no ring in his finger. Maybe a divorced wife with whom he parted ways begrudgingly, someone who still haunts his dreams. 
As you conjure up various scenarios of his relationship status, Seungcheol stirs in his sleep before a quiet groan escapes his lips.
You crane your head to take a better look at him, to see if he's awake but you soon realise he isn't as another pained groan leaves his lips, his large body shuffling in the congested space.
Is he having a nightmare?
You immediately get up and dash towards him, turning a light on the way and kneeling right beside the sofa. There's a light sheen of sweat coating his face and his eyebrows are marred in a frown as his eyes remain squeezed shut, his body writhing desperately "Seungcheol? Seungcheol!" You yell, grabbing his shoulders and trying your best to shake him out of whatever that's haunting him.
"No! No! Please, no!" The pain and helplessness in his voice halts your breath as you continue to shake him awake while his hands come to grab your arms in a tight hold, almost like an anchor. His grip only grows stronger as he yells in protest and you try your very best to wake him up once more. "Seungcheol! Please! Wake up! It's a nightmare!"
A set of blown out pupils look at you the next moment, and in a moment of silence a small shaky breath leaving his lips before they part slightly in shock. Then, before you know it, you are falling on your ass as Seungcheol shoves you away and scrambles to the farthest corner of the sofa. 
Even though your ass hurts, you know it was an unintended reaction. You whisper in a voice so soft as if you're talking to a wounded animal, "Seungcheol, it's okay. You're safe. You were having a nightmare."
The man sits still, hugging his knees as he still tries to catch his breath, a horrified look on his face. Not being able to bear it anymore, you immediately move to him and even though he flinches and tries to move away at first, he gives in when you wrap your arms around his shoulders. 
Soon he's burying his face on your neck as his large body curls around you, his hands gripping your night shirt tightly as if he's trying to mould himself into you. You feel his harsh pants on your shoulder so you try your best to soothe him, rubbing his back in repeated motions while whispering words of solace.
"It's alright, Seungcheol. I'm here. I have got you. It was just a bad dream."
You don't know how long you hold him like that but it seems to be a while, which feels too soon to you because Seungcheol pulls away from your arms before scooting away, putting a little distance between the two of you. He doesn't meet your eyes as he sighs, annoyed and dejected, while rubbing his temples.  "Are you okay? Would you like some water?" You offer. He shakes his head, looking down, his usual stoic mask settling back onto his face. 
"Why are you up?" He asks, his tone somewhat snappy. You frown. "I got out of bed to get a glass of water. You were having a nightmare, Seungcheol. Are you sure—"
"It's fine. It happens."
You are stunned at his lack of care. Is this a daily occurrence? Does he wake up every night, alone and screaming from his nightmares? Why is he allowing this to happen? Does he have someone to talk to? You want to ask all these questions but then decide against it due to the situation. Instead, you shuffle a little closer to him and start fixing his messy hair with a soft touch.
Seungcheol completely freezes at first and you expect him to bat your hand away but he doesn't. So you bite your lip to hide your smile as you finish fixing his hair before wiping the sweat off his brow. 
But you don't get to go far with that because Seungcheol grabs your wrist in a gentle hold, stopping you. His eyes scan over the length of your arms before he meets your eye. "Are you okay? I hurt you, didn't I?"
You simply shake your head and offer him a small smile which doesn't seem to convince him. His brows frown once again as you see him start overthinking so you put a stop to them. "I'm fine, Seungcheol, really. If you should be worried about anything, it is yourself. You're not on duty right now, you know. You can relax. I'm not a priority now." His eyes bore into yours and for a moment you see something foreign in his eyes. Something akin to vulnerability, longing, maybe even desperation.
"Go back to sleep, ____." His voice is gruff. "You've had a long day."
You want to protest but decided not to as huff out a breath and cast one more longing glance at him, hoping that maybe he would change his mind, before retreating to your room.
— It's ten o'clock when you wake up. 
Your first thought is that you are late for work, which makes you sit right up, ready to bolt out of bed but the next moment you realise it's a Saturday.  And you are not at home. You are at Seungcheol's place.
So you take your sweet time leaving the bed and freshening up, shuffling through Seungcheol's products in the bathroom. You also sneak in a sniff of his aftershave and cologne, smiling at yourself at your perverseness.
When you step out of your room, you find Seungcheol sitting on one of the breakfast stools, going through some documents with rapt attention. You stand by your door frame for a while, admiring his built frame from behind, his large back muscles and shoulders stretched beneath a white tee but you don't get to stare at him too long because his head turns around and catches you in the act.
"Good morning, _____." He greets.
You clear your throat, shuffling to the kitchen counter and pour yourself a glass of water, pretending as if he didn't just catch you eye fucking him. "Good morning, Seungcheol." Your voice is soft.
"Would you like to have breakfast now? I can make you some toast and omelette." He kindly offers. "There's also cereal if you want."
"I think I'll go with the cereal," You murmur, taking a seat opposite to him. You haven't had much of an appetite for the past few days which isn't really a surprise considering the situation.  Seungcheol goes back to scanning the documents in front of him while you sit in silence, sipping your water. You wonder wether you should bring up last night, maybe ask him if he's okay now but you have a suspicion it won't be received well by him. As you chew on your lip and debate the idea, Seungcheol looks up to meet your eyes, his face ever so serious.
"You have to take a break from work for a few days." He announces.
"What? Why?"
Probably for the first time, you see him hesitate which stresses you out. "What's wrong, Seungcheol? Tell me."
"You have received a few death threats, _____. I found them in your mail. For the time being, you need to lay low, appearing in public puts you at risk. In fact, we're leaving for a safe house today."
"Wait- what?" Your brain is trying hard to catch up. "Safe house? What are you talking about? I'm not safe here?"
"They know your address, _____. It won't take them long to get mine. I need to get you to an untraceable place."
You don't know what to feel or even how to react. You're at a loss as you try to figure out your next move. "What do those threats say exactly? Can I see them?"
Seungcheol's face hardens. "No. They're not pretty to look at." His voice brings shivers down your spine as a wave of nausea hits you. You had no idea your uncle could stoop so low. But then again, he's a murderer so you shouldn't have underestimated him. 
Seungcheol must have seen your face pale because he calls your name firmly, grounding your attention to him. "You are safe with me, _____. You just have to trust me, okay?" You find comfort in his eyes so you find yourself nodding immediately which satisfies him. "Get ready. We'll leave in two hours."
"Where are we going?"
"Don't worry about that."
"Does my father know?"
"About the death threats? Yes. He didn't seem too concerned about it though. Said it might be a prank."
Somehow, you're not surprised.
"But not about moving you to a safe location," Seungcheol adds. "No one needs to know about that. It's safer that way."
"Even my brother?"
"Yes. I suggest you call him and tell him you'll be out of reach for a while."
You deflate at that. Chan is going to be worried. And how on earth are you going to explain everything to him when all of this eventually unveils?
Seungcheol gets up, gathering all the papers and just as he turns to leave, he stops. "Oh, and ____? Don't come near me when I'm having a nightmare next time."
What?
"But Seungcheol—"
"For your own safety, _____. Don't. This is not a request." He doesn't wait for your reply but marches away as you silently watch his retreating form, lips pursed in annoyance.
The little appetite you had for breakfast is ruined as you go back to your room, cursing his stubbornness. As you pick up your phone to check for any important messages, a text from your dear father greets you. Your bodyguard told me you received death threats. Maybe it is better for you to stay at home and not work. For your own good, you should seriously consider giving your position to someone else. His flagrant attitude makes your blood boil as you fist your hands around your phone in a death grip before tossing it onto the bed in a fit of rage.
This day has not started off well.
— Two hours later you are well on your way to the safe house with a bag packed containing your absolute necessities. Your bodyguard has confiscated your real phone and gave you a burner instead just to be cautious.
Seungcheol, as always, drives the car in silence, the features of his face set to a grim expression. The air is thick with tension and you debate putting the radio on but even doing that feels too awkward.
"How long is the drive?" You finally ask, desperate to lessen this weird tension.
"We're taking a train from the station."
"Wait, what?"
"It is quite far. Driving there is going to take way too long." He calmly replies, eyes focused on the road. Sighing, you lean back and rest your head against the headrest. You let your eyes wander outside the window, watching the people, the view passing by while your mind runs rampant with all kinds of thoughts; anxious, restless.
A while later, you take notice of something in the rearview mirror and finally voice out the concern that has been bugging you for a while. "Seungcheol?" There's a touch of panic in your voice.
"Yes?"
"See that black Mercedes? It has been following us for a while…I think." You stare eagerly at Seungcheol waiting for his reply, waiting to be told that you are wrong but instead, a small, amused smile graces his lips.
"So you noticed, huh?"
It feels like your heart is going to drop out of your ass.
"What do we do?" You whisper, sitting up straight and craning your head back to take a proper look at the car. Sure enough, the SUV is right behind you, not even trying to be discreet anymore.
Fuck this crap, seriously.
"Trust me, I have got a plan. You just need to do as I tell you, okay?" He assures, his voice composed unlike yours.
"O-okay."
He turns to face you for a beat, giving you a reassuring look before continuing to drive in silence for a couple more minutes while the Mercedes stays on your tail. "Hold tight. I'm going to speed up. There's a parking lot about a mile from here. We're going to stop there."
"WHAT!"
You don't get your reply because the next second, the car is zooming forward as Seungcheol steps on the accelerator. You are gripping the dashboard and your seatbelt with your dear life as Seungcheol speeds through the lane like a madman, swerving every now and then. The Mercedes chasing you has a hard time keeping up with Seungcheol's viciously smooth driving because in a moment's time you are in the parking lot where Seungcheol parks the car in the corner farthest from the entry.
"Listen to me very carefully, ____." Seungcheol says as he turns the engine off and removes his seatbelt. "Crawl to the back and lay low, okay? No matter what happens, what you see, you do not make a move until I come get you, do you hear me?"
Your throat feels like sandpaper as you whisper. "Y-yes. Yes I do."
"Good." He squeezes your hand. "Now crawl into the back."
You do as you are told, moving into the backseat and crouching down as Seungcheol exits the car before locking it. You peek through the tinted window, watching with bated breath as the black SUV pulls up and two bald headed men exit the vehicle which parks right by the entry. They walk to Seungcheol, their stances predatory as they talk about something you cannot hear.
Next thing you know, one of the men is throwing an uppercut towards Seungcheol which fails to land because your bodyguard steps back, avoiding it easily.
Then, a full on fight ensues as the two men attack Seungcheol unsparingly. Seungcheol does not fail to keep up as he easily avoids them and counterattacks. Very soon, he is landing a kick on one of the men that throws him down to the ground with a harsh blow before grabbing the other guy and holding him in a chokehold. Soon, his body slumps to the ground.
Is he dead?
The other guy, meanwhile, recovers and charges for Seungcheol and you notice a bit too late that he has a knife because he manages to land a slash on Seungcheol's chest, making him stumble back. "Seungcheol!" Your hand unconsciously reaches for the door handle, tugging it to get out and help him. Alas, you can't do that. Fortunately, though, Seungcheol seems to not require any help as in the very next moment Seungcheol attacks the man, snatches the knife from him and bashes his head against the trunk of a car once, twice, thrice, making him fall into the ground, unconscious.
The breath you were holding finally escapes your lungs. Seungcheol dashes to the car the next moment, opening the back door and dragging you out by the arm before you can even say something.
"Come on. We don't have time."
"Wait, where are we going?" 
"There's a five minute shortcut to the station from here," he says, leading you by holding your hand as his legs pick up speed. "We have to run because they are expecting us to move by car. Come on!"
And so, you let him guide the way, his hand holding yours tightly, as you take the underground exit of the lot. You run for your life, your legs going sore but you manage to keep going just because of the adrenaline.  Soon enough, the station comes into view and Seungcheol picks up speed as the whistle of the train echoes through the air, informing its departure.
"Oh crap, we're not gonna make it!" You yell. "We will. Just keep running," Seungcheol hollers back as you both run parallel to the train that is slowly picking up speed. Suddenly Seungcheol lets go of your hand which throws you into a moment of panic but you keep running as you start to guess his plan.
You watch as he bolts for the entrance of the last carriage and in the blink of an eye, jumps inside.
"Holy shit." You curse. The next moment, he turns around and leans out the door, holding out one of his hands for you to grab onto while the other grips the handle by the door.  "Come on! Grab my hand!"
Your legs are so tired they feel shaky, ready to collapse any moment. Still, you run with all your might, holding out your hand, reaching for his. 
"Just a little bit! You can do it!" He encourages as the rhythm of the wheels intensifies, letting you know you do not have much time.
Oh shit.
Grunting in frustration, you put all the bridling remnants of your energy and dart forward which seems to be just enough, as your hand touches Seungcheol's. The next moment he grabs onto your hand and in the blink of an eye he is tugging your full weight and pulling you inside the carriage.
Upon entering, you collapse on the floor, panting loudly as Seungcheol lets go of your hand and cranes his neck out the door as if looking for something. Even though you are wheezing for air, you follow his line of sight and see two men running after the train as if they were chasing you. By now the train is moving at full speed, crossing the end of the platform, making them slow down and watch helplessly. "Who…are…they?" You choke between breaths.
"Your uncle's men." Seungcheol replies nonchalantly as he shuts the door and kneels next to you.
"How long have they been following us?"
"After we got to the station."
"Why didn't you say anything!"
"I didn't want to scare you." He replies, his hand wrapping around your shoulder. "Don't talk, just breathe. You did well."
You don't know if it is the intensity of the situation or the adrenaline crash or his words that make you slump in his arms, your body resting against his as you catch your breath. The feeling of his warmth against your body is something you are extremely grateful for at the moment.
"Please tell me you have tickets." You pant, resting your head against his shoulder.
"Of course. First class." _____ Five hours later, you are at your destination.
It is a cabin in a small town full of greenery and old architecture.  It is very picturesque, located in between a vast area of mountains, somewhere you'd come to spend the summer with your family maybe. Even though your situation is the farthest thing from a vacation, it doesn't stop you from admiring the beauty before your eyes.
"The place is very beautiful, Seungcheol." You admire the surroundings as well as the cabin.
It's somewhat isolated from the town, shrouded by the forest, as the nearest market from here is about ten minutes drive.
"Thank you, my grandfather made it. He left it for me." He provides as he carries your small bag from the car he borrowed from a friend here and unlocks the door with a key.
"We should do something about your cut." You mention worriedly, crossing the threshold as you see him slightly wince while moving. The bleeding seems to have stopped after he put some pressure in the wound but it still needs to be cleaned.
Hearing your words, he looks down to see the wound before shrugging, "It's fine. The bleeding has stopped."
You expected him to say something like that so you take matters in your own hands. "Is there a first aid kit here?" You ask as you pad to the bathroom, looking around carefully and sure enough, inside the cabinets under the sink, there's a first aid box.  Seungcheol murmurs grumbles of protest as you come back to the living area and ask for him to sit on the spot next to you on the couch.  Thankfully he listens to you. As he unbuttons his shirt, you disinfect your hands while trying your best not to peek at the delicious row of abs that comes into display. As his wound comes into view you cannot help but wince at the sight, which doesn't go unnoticed by your bodyguard. His hand immediately reaches to take the cotton swab from your hand, murmuring. "I can do it myself."
You tsk in disapproval, sending him your best scolding glare before resting one of your hands on his shoulder for support and gently swiping on the wound with the swab dipped in antiseptic with your dominant hand. Seungcheol sits still all through it while you hold your breath, channelling all your focus on the task at hand. 
It is scary; being this close to him and for some reason the act of cleaning up a cut is turned into something way too intimate by your brain. So, you don't dare to look in his eyes, afraid of what you'll see in them but terrified of what they will make you feel; something you can not resist or put a lid on, like the urge to cup his cheeks and kiss those irresistible lips.
You must be swiping at his wound with your face mere inches away from touching his chest for way too long because one of Seungcheol's hands comes to grab your wrist, stopping your movements.  "I think that's enough," His voice holds the aloofness that you are used to which makes you sigh.
"Does it hurt? Do you want a painkiller?" You still find yourself asking.
Seungcheol frowns. "No, ____. I'm fine. It's just a cut, I won't die."
"Still—"
"Maybe you should focus on yourself. You have had a long day—"
"Why do you always do this!" It takes a few moments for you to realise you are yelling. You stand on your feet, hands fisted at your sides as the first aid kit falls on the floor from your lap, spilling its contents all over.
"What do you mean?" He asks and you absolutely loathe how his voice never changes, laced with that touch of monotony and indifference.
"Ugh, Seungcheol! Why do you always push me away! I want to help you! I'm just trying to take care of you!" This, however, seems to evoke an emotion from him because he is immediately on his feet, glaring at you, his large body towering over you.
"It is not your job to take care of me! If anyone here is going to take care of someone, it will be me making sure you are alive, is that clear?"
"I'm just trying to help you yet you keep pushing me away—"
"I do not need your help!" His voice is a roar of thunder, making you gasp as you take a step back. You've never seen him like this nor did you imagine someone so unbothered and composed had a side like this. "Who are you, huh? Why do you keep stepping over the line? Did I ask for your fucking help? I'm the last person you should be worried about, Ms Lee, you understand that?"
By now, angry tears have gathered in your eyes. Not wanting to cry in front of him you bite your lips and push past him as you run towards your room. "Fuck you, Choi Seungcheol!" —
You spend a long time in your room, crying and cursing him out before eventually falling asleep out of exhaustion. 
When you are awake from your slumber, the clock reads 2 in the morning. Disoriented and irritated and hungry, the first thing you do after emptying your bladder is go hunt for something to eat. Even though you intended to avoid Seungcheol, it is impossible not to come across him as he sleeps on the couch in the living room, this one thankfully big enough for him to comfortably lie. 
There's a small lamp in the corner of the room and the light from there is falling on one side of his face, highlighting his cheekbones. 
You stand still for a moment to make sure that he's actually asleep, before tiptoeing to the kitchen. Pouring yourself a glass of water and you think of something easy to make that will not wake up the moody bastard in the next room. 
However, you don't get too far with that thought because a moment later, you hear an all familiar groan float through the quiet air of the night. It is Seungcheol. And he's having a nightmare. Once again. It's like deja vu.
All his commands of not helping him fly out the window as you run to the living room. Before you can reach there, however, you hear a crash and upon entering you see Seungcheol, wide awake and sitting on the floor on his hands and knees, his entire frame shaking violently as he keeps uttering something under his breath, still stuck in his nightmare. 
Your heart drops when you see the glass showpiece on the centre table shattered on the floor, along with the pillows and blanket that were previously on the couch. "Seungcheol!" You yell as you rush to him, carefully avoiding the broken shards of glass and sitting on your knees next to him as you try to get him out of his head and focus on you. His blown out pupils meet yours as his hands shake and his breath comes out in struggling pants. 
He's having a panic attack.
"Seungcheol!" you call for him, trying your best to keep your voice stable which proves to be hard as your heart breaks for the man, hating seeing him in this state. 
"Look at me. Listen to my voice. Breathe. Breathe with me. Look at me. Breathe, just breathe, you're going to be fine."
And so for the next few minutes, you try your best to calm the agitated man down, holding his body next to yours as you run your hands along his back, up and down, up and down.
You realise he's back to normal when the shuddering stops and his body remains immoblie next to you, as if he has fallen asleep.  You know otherwise because when you pull back to take a look at his face, you find his eyes open, that familiar, empty and aloof gaze replacing the panicked ones. His lips are set to a thin line and you feel his whole body stiffen next to yours and just like you know he is back to normal.
This time, you do not ask him if he's okay or if he wants anything. Instead you get up from the floor quietly and go to the kitchen where you quickly make him a warm cup of tea.
When you return, he's still on the floor, sitting with his back against the sofa, hands resting on his knees as his head hangs low. Silently, you walk over and sit next to him before extending the steaming mug towards him.
You hold your breath, waiting for him to reject it and start spewing mean words at you but you are to be amazed. 
Surprising you, he does none of those things but accepts the mug and takes a small sip. A tiny smile of victory graces your lips as you settle your gaze forward to the empty wall and sit in silence next to him. 
As the steam gradually disappears from the mug and his dejected posture becomes tense and uptight, you know he's about to tell you off.  Your guess turns out to be correct because just a moment later, he sets his mug down on the floor and turns to face you. His voice is stoic when he speaks, "I clearly told you not to—"
"Do you want to talk about it?" You interrupt him with a soft voice. He appears stunned as his mouth opens to say something but closes back to a tight line.
"I used to have nightmares as well, after the accident." You whisper, leaning back to the sofa, your unfocused gaze settled on the  walls of the cabin as your mind disappears in the depths of the memories of those gruesome nights.
"I'd wake up screaming and crying. Every damn time I'd see the crash so vividly and the moments before it, my mom's desperate eyes at mine, her fading words, telling me to hold on, telling me that she loves me..." You lose your voice with a choke as tears blind your vision. A hand comes to rest on your shoulder gently and gives you a reassuring squeeze. It takes a few moments for your brain to process that it's Seungcheol and you are pleasantly surprised. 
Your eyes search for him, and his face is solemn, his eyes showing just a reflection of kindness and sympathy. With a sad smile, you wipe the tears threatening to fall from your eyes. "It was horrible at the beginning when I couldn't speak. I'd wake up distressed and not finding my voice would make it even worse. For the first two months, Chan stayed with me every night. He'd try his best to calm me down but every night I'd be just as scared to go to bed."
"Eventually, the nightmares didn't come as often. Especially after I realised I could speak again and I was remembering bits and pieces of the accident and my suspicion was growing. I haven't had any nightmares for a while now but I remember how they made me feel. How awfully...real they felt." You sigh, shuddering at the thought.
A few moments of silence pass by as Seungcheol's hand drops from your shoulder. You don't expect him to spill his heart out but you are grateful that he didn't push you away and listened to you and comforted you. It is more than you ever thought you could get from him. Having this simple, somewhat bitter moment of intimacy is enough to soothe your love starved heart.  However, you realise it's a night full of surprises when Seungcheol starts speaking. "I was in the military, as you know. I joined when I was eighteen. I lost my parents the year before so it was just me and my grandfather." His voice is quiet as he fixes his eyes out the window, looking at the dark night sky.
You follow his gaze and make a quick observation that there are no stars tonight, just an empty, dark sky, before setting your gaze on Seungcheol's face. 
"My grandfather served in the military during the early years of his life and I wanted to follow his footsteps. The first few years were tough but good. I enjoyed them as they kept me busy and focused. During my fifth year in the military, my grandfather passed away peacefully in his sleep. I was on break at that time so I was there with him in his last moments. However, it still broke me. Sending him off was one of the hardest things I had ever done."
He pauses, making you hold your breath and anticipate his next words. His expression is unreadable, his sharp gaze focused outside when he continues.  "I returned to the military a different man. My life as a soldier became everything to me. I worked ten times harder than anyone else as the military turned into my entire life. I jumped through the ranks very quickly and went on various missions as a SEAL. All of them were dangerous but successful as I led my teams out safely each time. Until Sudan."
There is another heavy pause as you feel the air thicken with tension. You know the worst part is about to begin and as you observe his gaze become more and more unfocused, you can't help but dread whatever is coming next. "It was a humanitarian mission. Me and my team were tasked to rescue some families from a group of local terrorists. They were held inside a camp in the middle of the desert. The infiltration was successful. But, just as we were escaping, the terrorists found out and came at us with double manpower. They had a couple of high powered explosives which we were unprepared for because they were not supposed to have such weapons."
"As my team and I were exchanging fire against them, a bomb went off right next to me. It is the last thing I remember before waking up in a hospital bed a week later."
"The explosion fucked up left leg. I needed three surgeries and months of rehabilitation. But that wasn't the worst part. The worst part is that it cost three of my teammates their lives."
Oh Seungcheol. Tears are beading down your eyes as you let his words soak into you.
"It happened almost six years ago but it still haunts me. How I fucked up. How I killed them." "Seungcheol, no!" You scold, your voice not as powerful as you'd like it to be as it breaks mid way. "You did not kill them, you hear me? It was an accident. A horrible one but it was not your fault in any way. They died honourably and think of all the others you saved, all the times you led your team out of harm successfully. Think about all the lives you have saved, all the people you have helped." Your grip is strong on his forearms as you turn him to face you fully. His eyes meet you; bleak and hopeless and the urge to wipe away all his pain soars within you. It's a shame you can't do that so you do the next best thing you can think of.
You pull him in a tight hug. You wrap yourself around him, resting your chin over his shoulder as you close your eyes and hold him tight, the act a bit hard due his huge build. For several long moments he doesn't hug you back until you finally feel his warm hands creep on your back as he rests his face against your neck, cocooning your body with his.
You swallow a sob and blink furiously to drive away the tears, your hands stroking his hair in gentle motions. "It's alright, Cheol. You are going to be just fine. It is all going to be okay."
His response is to hold you tighter and you welcome his vulnerability, his pain and agony with open arms, breathing it in as if it is your own. Long moments are spent as you two remain in each other's embrace until you finally sit back to take a look at him.
"Maybe you should talk to a therapist?"
"I did," he sighs, running a hand through his soft locks. "After the accident, I saw one for almost a year. I was prescribed so many medicines and I almost got addicted to them even though they weren't doing much to help. So I decided to quit altogether and moved here, in his cabin. I stayed here for about six months, trying to pull myself together before an old friend of mine called, asking if I wanted to join his private security company. I agreed because I couldn't live in solitude any longer without killing myself and now, I'm here." You nod, watching him intently as you two sit with mere inches of space between each other's faces. In the back of your mind, you realize that this is the most intimate you have been with Seungcheol and probably you will ever get to be so you can't help but speak the next words. "You are so beautiful, Seungcheol. Inside and out. You are such an amazing person.I only wish you would know that." Your words can barely be heard because you speak so softly but it contains emotions from the deepest, rawest part of your heart. Sitting with him on the floor, in the middle of the night at a cabin in the woods, talking about your deepest traumas and secrets is something you never thought you would experience but now you realise, it is a treasure, a moment of profoundness that you will carry close to your heart for the rest of your life.
Seungcheol's eyes widen for a fraction upon hearing your words before he shifts, trying to pull away from you but your strong grip on his hands stops him. Once again, you find yourself confessing. "Ever since you've come to my life, I feel hopeful, even though we are going through so much trouble. I want to live again and I feel happy and hopeful when I look at you. And I can never thank you enough for that."
Seungcheol's Adams apple bobs as he swallows and the expression on his face is so vivid you realize you have left him speechless. A small, shy smile sets on your lips as you squeeze his hands softly, your thumb stroking over his bruised knuckles.  While your mind swoons over how tender this moment is and how beautiful he looks and how soft his lips appear, he inches his face closer to you before pressing his lips against yours.
At first, you believe it's a dream.
It is bound to be, no?
Blinking multiple times, you make sure that it in fact is not a dream but it seems to take too long because Seungcheol is pulling away from you, the apology right there at the tip of his tongue. However, you do not let him speak the words he doesn't mean. Instead, you do what you have only done in your late night fantasies, you cup his cheeks and pull his face down to yours, meeting his lips in a fierce kiss. You do not even think of holding back, pouring every bit of passion and need and admiration for him into it. 
Thankfully, he reciprocates, cupping your neck and jaw, tilting your face for better access. 
And it's wonderland. It is everything you imagined and more, everything you want and need, everything that can heal you.
In the rosy haze of desire and desperation, your hungry hands travel down to the hem of his white t-shirt, tugging on it in a futile attempt to get it off. The action gets the attention of Seungcheol as he dettaches his lips from yours, taking a look at your face.
"_____—" he makes a weak attempt to stop you but his words die on his tongue as you hastily stand up, dragging him with him. Pressing a soft finger on his lips, you shush him as you bring your face closer to him and whisper in his ear. "Don't push me away Seungcheol, please. I need you. And you need me too."
There is a battle in his gaze as he stares at your longing visage for a moment with a clenched jaw before muttering a curse underneath his breath. The next moment, you are being carried to your bedroom and in the blink of an eye, you are standing in front of your bed with his frame towering over you.
"You wanted this?" He teases but his eyes are lit with a fire that is inextinguishable as he takes off his shirt and even in the dimly lit room, you do not miss the carved perfection of his body, littered with scars here and there. In vain hope, you pray that your face isn't visible as you ogle him but you know it is because his unrelenting stare breaks your skin into goosebumps. 
As you are stuck in a trance of lust, he takes a step closer to you before his breath grazes your ear. "Lift your hands, angel."
The next moment, he pulls your nightshirt off your body, leaving you only in your sleeping shorts. He wastes no time, attacking them right next as they come off with a tug and you fall into your bed. You have no time to overthink or feel shy because Seungcheol cages your body underneath his as he crawls to you, a dark look of hunger on his face. 
"You are a fucking temptress, you know that?" He grunts, a calloused thumb reaching out to stroke your cheek. You lean into his touch, eyes falling closed at the contact as a soft sigh escapes your lips but the next moment Seungcheol is grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you in for a heated kiss. 
It's all teeth and tongue as he devours your mouth, two tongues entangled in a fierce rhythm of tango before finally letting you gasp for air.  "Crawl up," his voice is that of a quiet command which you follow instantly, letting him sit comfortably on his knees as he spreads your legs wide.
The very next moment a squeak leaves your mouth as Seungcheol pushes his index finger inside you, your wetness granting easy access. He makes a noise, something akin to an animalistic groan as his digit easily slips inside. 
"Fuck, you're so wet for me," he murmurs as he inserts another finger and then another before curling them inside you.
"Seungcheol!" You yell, grabbing the sheets as your hips lift off the mattress due to the electrifying jolt of pleasure. Your reaction makes him grunt as he fastens his face and you feel your legs tremble, making you think that you are going to come already. 
Your core tightens around his fingers as more wetness leaks from you, only amplified when he brushes his thumb against your clit. Another gasp and a shudder of your body makes Seungcheol smirk as he whispers, "Gonna come, angel?"
You nod your head aggressively, your hips chasing his fingers in their own rhythm and just as the tingles of your release soars in your body, Seungcheol removes his fingers.
"No!" Your protest is immediate but the man only gives you a cruel smile as he makes a show of licking his fingers clean. The act itself is extremely hot and you cannot help but release another groan of frustration. 
"Seungcheol! Please let me—"
"You are gonna lie back and let me eat your pussy now, hmm? After I'm satisfied, I will let you come." He announces, lips hovering over your thighs, the touch of his warm breath giving your goosebumps. The low gravel of his voice paired with the way he keeps looking at you from between your thighs makes you swallow thickly before lying your head back into the pillow, a shuddering breath leaving your lips.
"Good girl."
Good girl.
Your core clenches deliciously.  However, you do not get to soak in the warmth of his praise because the next moment he flicks your clit with his tongue and your scream pierces the night air. Your body writhes while he holds your thighs open in a strong grip, incoherent gasps and curses of pleasure falling from your lips. Seungcheol is like a man starved, as he eats you out mercilessly, his tongue going deep inside your most intimate parts. You can't remain still, tears of pleasure stinging your eyes as your body shakes and pleas fall from your lips.
"Oh f-fuck! Seungcheol! Please!" 
You yourself do not know what you are begging for. It's the sweetest torture, one you want to end but also continue forever.
Your release has wet your inner thighs and paired with Seungcheol's saliva they drip down to your asshole but Seungcheol doesn't stop. He brings his attention to your hard, swollen clit now which he flicks repeatedly with his tongue.
"Fuck! I can't! Please let me come!" You are convinced your voice can be heard from miles away. "You wanna come?" He grunts between breaths, voice muffled.
"Yes, yes! Please!"
"Then come. Come for me, my angel." The command has your toes curling as he gives a harsh suck to your clit and in an instant, you go off like a firework. The heated coil in your belly snaps as your body twitches, sending you headfirst into an orgasm so good, so deep, tears drip down your eyes. All through it, Seungcheol keeps sucking your pussy, almost making you numb before stopping with a final, sloppy kiss on your clit and sitting back.
Even in the darkness, you see his lips shine with your release.
"You are an aphrodisiac, angel." His words caress your skin as he leans forward and presses soft, tantalising kisses on your jaw and down your throat. 
"Please, fuck me now," your voice is a cry of plea as you chase his lips for a kiss. He entertains you, tangling your mouths in an embrace of passion as you taste yourself on his tongue. One of his hands moves down amidst the kiss and your foggy brain registers that he's taking off his sweatpants. 
With a soft groan he takes off his lips from yours and frees himself from your entangled limbs, standing up to kick his boxers and sweatpants down his legs. 
And oh dear lord is he a view. You admire him in his nakedness in the half lit room, drinking every inch of him. You can't stray your eyes from his cock, hard and leaking as you gulp and send a prayer to the sky, marvelling at his size.
Seungcheol crawls back into the bed, his movements akin to the grace of a panther, his eyes lit with ferocity and huger as he pins both your wrists over your head with one hand.
"I'm going to fuck you so good you will be ruined for any other man." He promises, giving you a delicious shiver on your spine. You want to scream that you don't need any other man, you never will but the thought dies in your mind when you feel his tip prodding at your core.  He slides in easily, almost embarrassingly easy as your sopping cunt welcomes him with wide open arms. A guttural groan escapes from his throat as he buries his head in the crook of your neck, spewing curses. The sound makes you clench around him which makes him curse again.
"You are so fucking tight, fuck!"
You can only respond in an incoherent hum as he starts moving inside you, making you throw your head back and let out a loud moan. He raises his head to look at you and your eyes contact and in a second, everything becomes more intense. The look in his eyes is ever captivating and ruthless while he pistons in and out of you tirelessly, hitting that sensitive spot inside you perfectly each time.
"You're going to be the death of me." He whispers, almost as if he's talking to himself. His mouth works on your jaw, moving down to your throat and sucking harshly on the soft flesh, making you shudder in pleasure. "Seungcheol!" You cry. "Harder! Please!"
"Any harder and I'll come right now."
"Do it! Come inside me!" All other thoughts and worries have left your mind and beg him for more, already cock drunk.
"Fuck, you sure?"
"I'm on pills, Cheol. I'm sure," you pant, clutching onto his back as he increases his pace, leaning back to sit on his knees as his hands move to your waist, holding you in a bruising grip.
"Gonna fill you up then, angel. Make this pussy bleed my come." He promises with a snark, his eyes trained on your face as he delivers one particular thrust that has you arching off the bed and seeing stars.
Then there is a brush of touch on your hard clit and a quiet command of coming which has fireworks exploding all throughout your body. You cry out, from pleasure and pain so addictive that white spots dance in your vision, hands twisting the fabric of the bedsheet so hard it would be no surprise if they tore.  The next moment you feel Seungcheol release inside you and the feeling of his warm cum coating your insides gives your body another round of shivers as you completely blank out. You are transported to a hazy place where you feel like you are floating through the air as you lose all sense of connection from this world.
It takes a while for you to recover and once you do, you realise Seungcheol has slumped over next to you as his breathing gradually returns to normal. You turn your head slightly to look at him and just as your eyes meet, he makes a move to get up.  Your hand immediately latches onto his arm. "Don't go." You croak.
"I need to clean you up." His voice is quiet.
"Later." You whisper, begging with your eyes. "Just lay with me for a while." He remains still for a moment, probably battling with himself before lying back next to you. He stretches one of his arms and you quickly use it as a pillow, shuffling closer to his body and resting your palm on his chest. Seungcheol tenses next to you but you don't let it get to you as your hand gently strokes an old scar right beneath his chest. Just as you are almost falling asleep, you feel his hand wrap around your waist, holding you softly and a smile graces your lips.
I love you, Choi Seungcheol.
— The next morning, Seungcheol starts avoiding you like you are the plague. As soon as you step out of your bedroom, Seungcheol, who was sitting in the living area quite literally bolts outside with his laptop and everything, throwing a curt good morning to you and not even sparing a glance.
You are hurt, to say the least. While a silly part of you expected that maybe you would wake up with him in the same bed and have breakfast together before some more lovemaking, the realistic part of you did not expect him to act like this. 
Like nothing happened.
Or worse, acting like what happened was a mistake.
Does he really think that last night was a mistake? 
It hurts to even think that he might believe that so you push that thought away with all your might. Instead, you focus on making yourself a nice breakfast before soaking in the tub for a while as you try to focus all your attention on plotting your uncles demise.
Once you are nice and clean after the soak, you find Seungcheol in the kitchen, drinking something from his mug as he talks over the phone with someone. You wait for him to finish, using the spare time to admire how good he looks— slightly messy hair, an old grey t-shirt and grey sweatpants. Once again, your mind travels to how good he railed you last night but before it can travel too far, you shake yourself back to the present.
"I need to talk to you." You announce as soon as he sets his phone down. Seungcheol's head snaps up to your voice and a grim expression settles on his face before he murmurs. 
"There's nothing to talk about. Last night was an accident. We were both vulnerable and it just... happened." It's like someone ripped your beating heart off of your chest or dumped you into a bucket of ice or better yet, did that together. Yet it still wouldn't hurt as much as his words pierce through you right now, leaving you utterly speechless as you just blink repeatedly, trying to make sure you heard that right. "It was not an accident, Seungcheol. You know it." Your voice is deathly quiet and you can feel yourself on the precipice of snapping.
"The hell it wasn't, _____." He snaps. "I am your fucking bodyguard and you are my client. I am not getting paid to take advantage of you!"
"Take advantage of me?" You seethe as an overwhelming urge to punch something, like his face, overcomes you. You have to take a deep breath in to form the next words. "I am not some helpless, pathetic girl that you can take advantage of. Whatever happened last night was real and with our consent. The man last night was the real you, the one you keep hiding, not this!" Seungcheol clenches his jaw, running a frustrated hand through his hair. "Either way, it should not have happened. We, you and me—" he points between the two of you. "It does not work. It won't."
"Seungcheol— "
"That's enough _______."
"No, tell me. Enlighten me, please," Your voice drips with sarcasm as you take a step towards him, crossing your hands in front of your chest. "Why do we not work? What delightful, eye opening information has been revealed upon you which led you to this wise conclusion?" The twitch in his jaw clearly tells you that he does not appreciate your sarcasm but you've had enough of his stubbornness, especially when it is clear that he wants you as well.
"So far, I'll I've heard is that I can't have you not, I don't want you. Quit playing games with yourself Seungcheol!"
"I am a fucking loose grenade!" His scream is abrupt, making you jolt. The veins in his neck pop out as he steps back, his frantic eyes glaring at you. "I cannot keep you safe! Not from myself. I am a man whose past haunts him. I can't fucking sleep at night without getting nightmares and smashing things! I cannot pass a day without the guilt of my past following me! I am headed towards hell and I cannot drag you down with me. I am not the man for you, _____, try to understand!"
"I think that's for me to decide, no?" You take another step towards him, trying to calm him down.
"No!" He yells, stepping back. "Enough! Just— enough. This conversation is over. I'm going out and when I return, we will pretend that none of this ever happened."
"You fucking asshole!"  You normally do not curse.  Out loud at least. Your mother had a strict rule of no bad language and you and your brother followed that rule to a t. No matter what you have encountered so far in your life, nothing gave you the urge to curse half as much as you want to right now.
"That's right. I am an asshole." He states calmly, sparing you a blank look before turning and heading for the main door.
"You fucking son of a bitch! I did not want to talk about this in the first place! When I said I need to talk with you, I meant about my uncle, you idiot!"
He stops in his tracks before slowly turning his head to look at you. "What about him?" His calmness makes you absolutely livid and even though you try your hardest to form words, the only thing your tongue seems to want to utter are curse words.
"It doesn't concern you anymore, asswipe." Seungcheol's lips form a thin line as he watches you quietly for a few moments.
"Do not do anything stupid,_____." He has the nerve to order you before marching out of the house, slamming the door loudly behind him.
"Go to hell, dickhead!" —
The rest of the day is uneventful as you two mind your own business, avidly avoiding each other. After Seungcheol leaves and blesses you with solitude you pace around the house angrily before going for a walk in the forest behind the cabin.
It is not dense or uncomfortable as a walking trek has been premade and you take a long walk which helps you clear your head just a bit. It takes your mind off of your stubborn bodyguard and back onto your uncle as you think of ways to trap him in a position he cannot easily get out of, as early as possible. With the plan you have in mind, it proves to be a bit hard, because you are staying in the middle of nowhere and your uncle has no clue where you are.
You walk home an hour later with a less obscure mind and send Chan a text through the burner phone, letting him know that you are alive and well. 
Your brother video calls you soon after and you almost forget that you are supposed to be mute at the joy of seeing your brother. It kills you that you have to lie to him but you bite your teeth and do it, telling him that work got too overwhelming and you are taking some days off and promise him of your quick return. You know your brother is not stupid and he has started doubting you but he is kind enough not to push you for more, which you are grateful for.
Seungcheol returns home a little after noon with more supplies. You act like he does not exist as you finish your lunch and retire to your room where you spend the rest of the day, lying in your bed and staring at the ceiling, thinking about everything and nothing. As the skies bleed to dark, dinner time rolls around and you two eat separately. Once again, Seungcheol makes no attempt to talk to you or acknowledge you just like you are doing but it still infuriates you, which you try to control by doing copious amounts of yoga in your room, before finally falling asleep quite late.
However, disaster strikes with the arrival of dawn, as the first rays of sun kiss the sky. 
You are snapped out of sleep as you open your eyes and find Seungcheol hovering over you, shaking you awake.
"Wake up, _____! Your uncle is here. He found us!"
Immediately you bolt upright, half thinking that all this is a vivid dream. As your panicked eyes meet his, your shaky hands clutching his biceps and you whisper. "W-what? How? I- I don't understand."
"I don't know either." Seungcheol grunts, craning his neck to look out the window. "There are two jeeps heading towards us. You need to get out."
As if on cue, you hear the loud roar of the engines as they come to a stop right in front of the cabin. Seungcheol helps your shaky form out of bed and ushers you down the stairs. 
"Take the back exit. Hide in the forest until I come for you. If I don't, call Jihoon for help. His number is here. And take this." he explains, handing his burner phone and a gun to you but your brain is stuck in a loop, not processing that there is a fucking gun in your hand.
"What do you mean if I don't? You are coming with me—"
"No. I will hold them off while you escape. Go, now." He orders, pushing you towards the back door of the kitchen. 
"_____! I know you're in there! Come out while I am being nice and maybe we can come to an agreement! You do not want to end up like your mother, do you now?" Your body freezes as you hear your uncle yell from the front door. The anger evoked from his words makes you want to stay and confront him but Seungcheol keeps pushing you, telling you to run.
And so, sparing one last longing look at Seungcheol, you tuck your weapon in your waist and run. You have not gotten even fifty feet away from the cabin when the first round of shots echo through the air. Your blood freezes as you come to a halt, turning your head around to look at the cabin as gunshots echo through the air.
You have to swallow a lump in your throat as tears gather in your eyes, the temptation to go back increasing. But you know going back is not a good idea because it will put Seungcheol's life at risk, more than it already is. So you keep moving deeper into the forest, the treks familiar because you have been here before and you make your way through very easily. When you come across a small cliff shrouded by thick bushes you decide to hide there, waiting to see if your uncle's men come around here. Confirming your guess, they do, after a while as they jog through, looking around for you. However, they fail to estimate your hiding place and continue deeper into the forest down the trek and just then, an idea forms in your head.
You have to go back.
The universe is on your side because you realise after some peeking around and shuffling through trees that there is another road that you can use to go back to the cabin. This one is definitely unused and riskier but you are determined to make this work. So, with a deep breath you jog through the narrow, muddy lane and soon enough, you find your way back.
The cabin is now quiet, eerily so.
The back door remains open, granting you access and you carefully step one foot in, holding your breath. 
It is a mess; bullet holes scattered around, a few bodies slumped on the ground, specks of blood all over the floor. The scene is bone chilling and you have to take several deep breaths to calm down. You can hear noises coming from somewhere in the house, grunts and yells, as if people are fighting, which is what is undoubtedly happening. No matter how severe your urge is to follow the sound and make sure Seungcheol is okay, you decide against it, putting faith in his capabilities instead and sending a prayer out to heaven. Careful not to step on any blood, you make your way through the mess and gingerly climb up the stairs, pausing to make sure no one is around. The coast is clear, thankfully, as no one is upstairs and you head straight for the little storeroom next to the bedroom, where you kept the very little belongings you brought with you.
You took special care to hide your prized possession, the evidence file. It stays secure inside a special compartment Seungcheol showed you that is situated under the wooden floor. Quickly removing the carpet, you open the hatch and look inside to make sure the files are there.
And they are, thankfully. Picking them up, you hold them to your chest and close the hatch, putting everything in its place while holding your breath through all of it. In the next second, the voice you dreaded echoes through the air.
"I believe I am going to need that, _____." 
You whip your head back to see your dear uncle standing at the door frame, lips twisted in a diabolic smirk like he got you just where he wanted to.  "I knew you would lead me to the evidence, niece. I just had to wait. And I knew you would contact your dear little brother no matter what so I put a little tracker on his phone and it led me here. Easy, no?" He shakes his head,  laughing cockily at his plan.
Your blood runs cold as your fingers grip the envelope tightly.
"Over my dead body." You hiss.
"Oh yeah, and my men told me you could speak?" He taunts, shaking his head some more. "Can you imagine my surprise when I heard that? Tell me, were you faking it all along? To what, get some pity points?"
"You will rot in jail, asshole. I will personally see to it." You seethe, clutching the folder tighter against your chest.  Your uncle's face loses its amusement as he stares at you for a while, cold and unblinking before reaching back and pulling out a gun. Your heart skips a beat as he points it right at you.
"The file, ______. I am not here to play games."
"Never." There is an immediate deafening noise of gunfire, making you squeeze your eyes shut and for a horrible moment, you think he has shot you. Opening your eyes, you see there's a hole in the roof where he has aimed his gun before pointing it back at you.
"Don't make me kill you like your mother. I need you alive for all the other plans I have."
"She was your sister in law!" You cry.
"She was a thorn in my way!" He seethes. "A conniving bitch trying to take the company from me and my son! Always challenging me! Always speaking against me!"
"It was never yours to begin with, you ugly old man! She knew you would steal it from us!"
"I dare you to speak one more word and the next bullet will be in your hand and the one after that will be in your leg. I won't do the mercy of killing you, _____. I will put you through hell on earth before I grant you the freedom of death." He sneers, eyes fueled with hatred. You swallow, your breath coming out in heavy pants as you decide on what to do next. 
Finally, with a defeated sigh you raise your arms in surrender and take a small, tiny step towards him, trying to appear as meek and harmless as possible. "You could have not killed her. You could have sent her away if she was a problem." You whisper, voice cracking. "Huh," he scoffs. "As if that bitch would listen. The only way was to get rid of her. For good. I knew she would be in the car with you that day and I planned to kill two birds with one stone but alas, that didn't happen" He shrugs, pouting. "It's alright, though. I know how to use it in my favour. I have so many plans for you. You're gonna come with me and sign off—"
"Drop the gun, Jin."
Seungcheol!
It is Seungcheol, pointing his Glock at the back of Jin's head as he appears behind him all of a sudden. You are flooded with gratitude so big tears come to your eyes and hope flares in your chest seeing him alive, hurt and dishevelled but alive. However, your hope is quick to die down when Jin speaks the next words.
"You sure you wanna do that, son?" Your uncle remains unaffected as he slightly turns his head, his words directed to Seungcheol. "You pull the trigger and by the time it has hit me I can pull the trigger as well and her brains will be splattered all over these walls. You don't want that, do you? Besides, I know as a matter of fact your boss here wants me alive. She has grand plans for me, is that not right, _____?"
His eyes pan back to you, the evilest of smiles on his face as you grit your teeth, trying to keep yourself from doing anything rash.
You underestimated your uncle for sure.
"Drop the gun, son. I won't say it again." He orders, taking a menacing step towards you. "You drop it and nobody gets hurt. I need this bitch alive for everything I have planned." Seungcheol's eyes meet yours and the helplessness and frustration is visible in them. You watch with bated breath as he slowly points the gun away from Jin's head and sets it down on the ground, raising his hands in surrender. A satisfied smile sets on your uncle's face and he lets his guard down for a moment, a fraction of a second, which Seungcheol takes advantage of.  In the blink of an eye, Seungcheol jumps on him, grabbing his legs and dragging him down onto the floor. His grip on the gun falters, letting it fall on the floor and as he makes a move to reach for it, Seungcheol kicks it to the farthest corner of the room.
A scuffle between them ensues and Seungcheol tries to overpower Jin and pin him down onto the floor. However, your uncle, the master of playing dirty, manages to pull a switchblade from his pocket and slashes Seungcheol on the arm, making him fall off of him. "I'm gonna fucking gut you, you son of a bitch!" He yells, charging for Seungcheol as he pins him down, aiming the blade towards his throat but Seungcheol stops him with a practised move. An intense battle of power ensues but you've had enough as you reach  for the gun Seungcheol gave you, tucked at your waistband.
Pointing it straight at Jin's head, you yell. "Drop the knife, Jin! I really don't want to kill you!"
"You don't have the balls to shoot me, bitch!" He yells back, not even glancing at you, busy subduing Seungcheol as he stabs him in the shoulder. That motherfucker!
He underestimated you greatly.
Furious, you pull the trigger and the bullet lands right where you aimed it, Jin's knee. With a howl of pain, he falls off of Seungcheol who quickly gets back up and wraps an arm around his throat in a chokehold.
"You filthy little bitch! You fucking —"
Seungcheol tightens the grip on his neck and after struggling for a few moments, Jin passes out, making you sigh in relief as you step back and lean against the wall. "You shot him." Seungcheol's voice is laced with bewilderment as he watches you with a look of surprise and admiration. "Self defence," you shrug, closing your eyes and inhaling a deep breath. "Tie him up. I'll call the police."
— Fifteen minutes later the cops arrive with blaring sirens followed by an ambulance. 
As soon as the ambulance comes to a stop, you are dragging Seungcheol towards it, yelling at the staff to get a look at his shoulder, around which you have wrapped a cloth to lessen the bleeding. As a responder attends to Seungcheol's injury, two policemen rush into the house when you tell them that the culprit is tied up inside. 
You stand out front with your arms crossed, the morning sun now high in the sky, the warm rays caressing your face as you watch your uncle being dragged out of the house and into one of the police cars. He is yelling and cursing his complaints, his eyes filled with hatred as they come in contact with yours. 
Your body goes rigid, the revelation coming upon you that he is done for and he knows it. You know he is definitely going to deny everything but he has another surprise coming his way.
An officer comes to you, talking about the next procedures and asking basic questions but you cannot quite register his words as your body finally gets off the high of adrenaline and realisation hits you like a bulldozer, it's over.
It is over. You got him. 
I got him, Mom. I will make him pay.
Seungcheol, who sits at the back of the ambulance while a nurse gives his shoulder a temporary fix, listens to the officer carefully, answering his questions in your place before thanking him as he takes his leave. 
"Are you okay?" Seungcheol's uninjured hand comes up to gently touch your arm, making you jump as you are snapped out of your reverie.
"Would you like me to look at you, ma'am? The responder offers as she takes off her gloves. "You look pale." You shake your head, swallowing as you wrap your arms around yourself. Seungcheol gives your hand a tug, making you sit next to him.  "Please take a look at her." He says to the nurse, who nods while he shrugs off the blanket sitting on his shoulder and wraps it around yours with his free hand. 
"Breathe, _____." He speaks softly, his hand holding yours. You nod, focusing on your breath for the next few minutes as the nurse does a quick check up on you. There are a lot of unshed tears within you and a lot of emotions you need to let out but you just cannot bring yourself to do that right now. There is this numb feeling all over you accompanied by an overwhelmingness.
And you know very well the war isn't over just yet. You have to make sure your uncle ends up behind bars. Even though you have some control over your emotions right now, you remember that you have to explain every hideous detail to Chan and you know will break down then. You know you will break down again when you visit your mother's grave but you know this time, you will feel less guilty of being the only one surviving, less in agony because you have avenged her.
"I have called my lawyer. He's preparing all the documents. We should head home now." You speak, eyes staring at the sun shining over the hills and the lush greenery.
This place is magical. You want to come here again, someday.
"Okay," Seungcheol agrees as his hand comes to rest over yours and he gives you a reassuring squeeze. Your eyes pan back to his face, littered with cuts before settling on his shoulder.  You open your mouth to scold him for getting hurt when he sighs. "What were you thinking, _____? I told you not to come back to the cabin. Your uncle had you just where he wanted. You could have been seriously hu—
"I had a plan, Seungcheol."
"What plan?" He looks annoyed. A soft smile graces your lips as your hand travels to the front pocket of your shirt. You pick the pen sitting there and hand it to Seungcheol with a mischievous smile. Frowning, he examines the item carefully until it dawns on him as his eyes widen. "This has a camera!"
"Yep! It can record audio and video very clearly. I had it on me for a while and as I was hiding in the forest I suddenly realised that I couldn't get better proof against my uncle than right then. So I went back to be the bait."
"Still, you don't realise how risky—"
"Trust me, I do. But I had no option. Besides, my gut told me that my uncle really didn't want to kill me unless he had to because after everything that happened, I was more valuable to him alive than dead." Seungcheol stares at you, all a loss for words before shaking his head in disbelief. 
"Wanna know something more fun?"
"What?" He is wary. "The documents I hid? They are not the real ones!" You cannot hold back a laugh as Seungcheol looks as you, more perplexed than before.
"I mean, come on! I'm not that stupid! I wouldn't carry them with me knowing my uncle is looking for them! I hid the original files in Chan's safe after I had him promise me not to touch them."
"Wow…" Seungcheol shakes his head in utter disbelief as he tries to wrap his head around everything. "Still, if I hadn't come for you on time…"
"I knew you would, Seungcheol. I believed that deep in my heart." You whisper, fingers lacing with his as your eyes meet. Seungcheol swallows and looks away, blinking. With a soft sigh, you stand up. "Are you sure you can travel this long in the car? Should I call in a helicopter for you?" Seungcheol rolls his eyes, standing up as well. "It's a fucking graze, _____. I have had way worse and I survived. I will be fine. I already feel fine." Your eyes narrow at him and you want to reprimand him but you cannot find it in your heart to do so. With a sigh, you usher him towards the car. "Let's go then. I'll drive."
— The next 48 hours pass by in the blink of an eye as you go through the most hectic time of your life. 
The first thing you do upon entering the city is sit down with your lawyer for a detailed discussion on the next steps you are going to take and hand the video recording to him. After that you ask Chan to come over to your place where you explain everything to him from a to z. It proves to be one of the worst moments of your life as you watch your brother's face pale with every word you utter and by the time you finish explaining everything he goes as still as a statue before abruptly taking his leave.
The next day you are asked to give a statement to the police along with Seungcheol which takes quite a while as you explain everything in detail. During that time the news breaks about your uncle getting arrested and charged for both murder and attempted murder leading to a flock of reporters chasing you down wherever you go. 
The stocks of the company are also affected as a side effect of the scandal and you have to spend a good amount of time in the office as you try to reassure everyone and get everything under control with your business partners.
On the third day after Jin's arrest, the police officially read out all the charges against him and announce the dates of the trials which sends the press into a second round of frenzy as they try to get your opinion on it, mobbing you whenever you step outside.
Your father is also taken in for questioning where he, thankfully, admits to his crimes and then he is also arrested with the charge of withholding information. He claims that his brother was blackmailing him so he had to keep the murder a secret. Whatever his reason was, you do not care anymore.
You refrain from engaging with the press as much as possible, other than the press conference arranged by your company that you had to attend but you do not make any comments about your uncle or father, just announcing that they will be punished accordingly and you and your brother will do your utmost best to protect the company. 
Amid all of this, Seungcheol refuses to leave your side, even with his injured shoulder. 
The wound was not deep but he was advised not to move the shoulder too much, an instruction he didn't pay any heed to when he was protecting you from the fleet of reporters. Taking it a step further than that, he called his friend over from the agency, the man called Jihoon, to be your second bodyguard because he believed that he was not functioning at his best.
Overall, it turns out to be a crazy, sleep deprived but exciting few days as you see all the pieces of the puzzle fall into its rightful place.
What is not exciting, however, is the straining relationship between you and your brother. After your confession to everything, he grows quieter and avoids talking with you unless it's absolutely necessary, which you understand and respect. He is processing the murder of his mother and his family members' participation in it and you also understand he feels betrayed because you kept so much information from him.
Still, it hurts.
This is why it is a surprise when you see him walk through the double doors to your office on a weekday morning as you were going through the legal statements of the company. "Chan!" You gasp, rising from your chair, eyes wide open in surprise. "What are you doing here?"
He gives a half hearted shrug before sitting down on the couch by the floor to ceiling windows, his gaze focused on the skyline.  "I had some things to tell you." Okay... You chew on your lip as you walk over to him and take a seat in front of him. You watch your brother stare off into the distance out the window before he finally heaves a long sigh and looks at you. The sadness and exhaustion are clear in his eyes and it breaks your heart. This whole media circus has not been easy for him either, especially because he knew nothing of what was going on and the press attacked him like a bunch of piranhas.
"The week has been crazy for you." He states, matter of factly. 
You give him a small, sad smile. "Same goes for you."
"Yes. I am feeling a lot of emotions together however..." he stops for a second before boring his gaze at your eyes. "I cannot help but feel betrayed."
"Oh Chan—"
"No, it's okay." He holds up his hand, stopping you. "I know that was not your intention and it is not your fault. It is none of our fault. I feel betrayed by this... family, this situation. I feel so angry that all of this happened right under my nose and I—" he huffs, dragging a hand through his hair as his voice fades. "I knew nothing about it."
"It is not your fault."
"It kind of is." He grunts. "I...I should have been more careful, more aware—"
"You couldn't have prevented it, Chan. It would only get you hurt in the process."
"Exactly! It would and that's how it should be. We're a team, you and I. So I should be equally responsible but only you got hurt in this process. You have been carrying all this burden with you since the accident. Not to mention the crazy stunt at the cabin. Are you insane, _____? I saw the video and he had a gun for fucks sake!"
"So did I!" You admonish. "Besides, he wasn't going to shoot me."
"You couldn't be sure!"
You drag out a sigh in surrender as you admire your brother for a silent moment as he suddenly reminds you of Seungcheol. "Whatever it was, it's in the past and I am safe now. However, I am sorry. For lying to you, for keeping you in the dark."
"Yes, I am actually quite mad at you for acting mute in front of me." He narrows his gaze at your face. 
"Well at least you learned sign language because of it!"
He snorts and you chuckle, a more comfortable silence falling between the two of you as you stare at each other for a while with melancholic smile on your faces. After a while, he announces, "I am going away for a while."
"What? Where?" You gasp.
"I don't know where, actually. Somewhere with a beach and lots of sunshine maybe. Away from…here." He smiles faintly. "I just...I need to be away for a while and process everything and simply be in my own company. I just need some time, sis." Tears shine in your eyes. "I understand." You whisper.  You really do but it still pains you because you feel responsible for breaking his heart.
"Take all the time you need. I'll handle the business while you are gone."
"Good. I know you will manage it well, maybe even better than me," he gives you a smile, a real one that reflects the shine in his eyes and you mirror it back. He stands up, buttoning his suit jacket. "Oh, by the way, what is going on between you and your hunk of a bodyguard?"
"Hm? What do you mean?" You feign innocence, avoiding his gaze, surprised at his observation. "Oh please." He gives you an it-is-very-obvious look. "The chemistry between you two has been explosive from day one. You always have that dreamy look in your eyes when you look at him."
"I do not!" You gasp. "Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night." He shakes his head in mirth. You huff out a dejected breath of surrender. "It doesn't matter anyway. He doesn't want me."
"Should I beat him up?" He asks casually, making you snort.
"You would lose, you know." You roll your eyes. That makes him laugh before he takes a step towards you. "I would deprive you of a hug but since you are already heartbroken, come here." 
You immediately get up and wrap your arms around your brother in a tight hug. You sniff, holding back tears as he pats you in the back, and you whisper. "I will miss you. Text me every now and then."
"Will do," he promises with a smile, pulling back and squeezing your shoulder. As he starts walking, he yells over his shoulder, "Do not think of getting married to that hunk while I'm not here though!"
"Yes, sir!" Rolling your eyes, you yell back and watch him walk out the double doors before plopping back on the couch, an eerie feeling of emptiness settling in your chest.
It takes a while for you to realise that tears are streaming down your face. Upon realisation, you simply hang your head low, letting them flow and stare at the floor, vision blurry as you play back the events of the last 6 months in your head. 
A soft knock at the door makes you snap your head up, breaking your trance as you quickly swipe your fingers below your eyes, head turning to see who enters. 
It's Seungcheol, composed in poise and grace as he steps inside before coming to a stand beside you. Silently, he asks for permission to sit, something you have told him multiple times not to do and when you give him a nod he takes a seat opposite to you. "You have been crying," he states quietly as he regards you with a knotted brow. You sigh and blink a couple of times before asking. "I'm fine now. What's the update? Any problems?"
He shakes his head. "Things are under good so far. You still need to give a formal statement at the fundraisers event next week, so you have to prepare for that."
"Hmm," you nod. "What brings you here, then? Are you feeling okay? I told you to take a day..." Your voice fades as you watch him produce a white rectangular envelope from his pocket and push it towards you on the table.
You have a sinking feeling in your chest that it is a resignation letter. 
"I am submitting my letter of resignation." He says, as calmly as ever, his eyes straight on yours. Your mouth opens but fails to deliver the words as you tilt your head to the side, processing this action. 
You have no problem with him resigning. In fact, you had planned to fire him after this hellish week ends so that you two could have a discussion about where your relationship stands, without all these professional restrictions limiting you. However, knowing Seungcheol, you have a sinking suspicion that he isn't quitting so that he can address his feelings for you but so that he can escape. 
Still, you decide to feign ignorance.
"Good. I was planning on firing you anyway. Not that you were bad at your job, you were the best but you need to rest, Seungcheol. And I have Jihoon now so I'll be fine." You nod as you pretend to go through his letter but inside, your hearts thuds so loudly you are afraid it will burst. 
"As of today, I am relieving you of your duties, Choi Seungcheol." You offer him a shaky smile. Seungcheol nods, his face as impassive as ever and you just cannot tell if he is heartbroken or relieved. His body language tells you that he is ready to get up and leave but you do not let that happen so easily.
"Now we can finally talk about our relationship." You speak, trying to keep your voice as stable as possible. Seungcheol visibly tenses as his face loses some of its colour and immediately you know this is not going to end well. 
But you are adamant on seeing this through.
"There is nothing to talk about." His voice is quiet, almost inaudible as he sits there looking like a petulant child lying to his parents. You have to take a deep breath to compose yourself. 
"You can do many things, Seungcheol but you cannot lie to me." You keep your voice as gentle as you can.
Your ex bodyguard seems to agree as he lets out a dejected sigh and stares at the floor very attentively. You watch him with intent for a few long moments, giving him time but ultimately when he remains as stubborn and unmoving as a mule, you break the silence. 
"I will lay all my cards on the table, Seungcheol, since you can't seem to do that. I have feelings for you, Seungcheol. Feelings that are very, very deep and real and I'm willing to act on them. Do what is necessary to make this work— make us work." 
He is quick to disagree. "Those feelings that you talk about, they are not love, ____. It is temporary. The last few weeks have been intense and it's just your body's natural reaction —"
"Do you love me, Choi Seungcheol?" You interrupt him, looking him straight in the eye.  The man looks like he swallowed a sock and you would feel bad for him, maybe even laugh at his reaction if the situation was not so dire.
"It does not matter." He looks away. You have the urge to hurl something at his head; the lamp next to you seems very tempting, but you fight it by clenching your fists a few times, trying to put yourself in his shoes.
"Seungcheol, I heard you that day in the cabin. I hear you now and I completely understand your fears. But I am here and we will work through them. It will take time but I'm ready, no matter how long it takes. I just want you, Seungcheol, and it kills me because I know you want me too yet you keep punishing yourself."
By now you have learned to read the man well and what might be easily overlooked by others comes into your notice; like how he clenches his fists and how his Adams apple bobs as he heavily swallows. The look in his eyes is that of a pure battle, one that he is fighting against himself and it's hard to watch. You are about to stand up and hold his hand when he suddenly moves onto his feet, his posture rigid as he glares down at you.
"I do not want you. What happened at the cabin was a mere moment of weakness. And you don't want me either, ______. You will soon realize it."
This gaslighting asshole!
"So you are going to lie to yourself till the very end?" You hiss, standing up and stepping closer to him, meeting his eyes with an equal glare.  "If anyone is lying to themselves here, it is you." He spits. "Our relationship was supposed to be professional from the start. I am a bodyguard and you are merely one of my protectees. Let us end it that way." He takes a step back while you watch him with a flabbergasted expression at his audacity. He uses your moment of weakness to say. "It was nice working with you. Hopefully, you won't need me again. Goodbye, Ms. Lee." The next moment he is pushing past you as his footsteps echo on the cold marble floor, the sound similar to that of your heart as it cracks.
"If you walk away now, I will never forgive you, Seungcheol!" You yell, voice cracking as tears gather in your eyes, your gaze focused outside the window, your back facing him. No reaction comes from behind you except for the footsteps which come to a halt. 
"Do you really want to end it like this?" Your whisper is followed by silence but through the eerie quietness in the room, you know the words reach him well.
His reply comes a few seconds later, in the form of footsteps that echo farther and farther away from you followed by the sound of the door opening and then closing and then utter silence. —
The fundraiser's event is going in full swing, bustling with people when you arrive. Draped in a red silk dress and diamond jewellery you look like a million bucks but in reality you feel nothing like that and you have no desire to be here whatsoever. But you know it is necessary to make an appearance as the host because it is extremely important to show up after the scandal to assure everyone that things are going well. Except they are not. While your professional life has slowly started getting back to its normal place your personal life has plummeted because all that you have done in the past week is mope around and curse your ex bodyguard and bitch about him to your current one, Jihoon.
The best way you can describe Jihoon is a grumpy cat. He talks very little but whenever he does, he's always huffing and complaining. But you see his softer side peek through from the little acts he does for you like making sure you eat your meals properly, checking up on you after your crying session and preparing all your documents and briefing you every morning. His tsundere antics and his silent company have probably been the only driving force that has kept you sane after Seungcheol dumped you.
The event is taking place in a banquet hall in the city centre and once inside, Jihoon guides you to a private resting room where you get ready for the opening speech. "I don't think I will stay till dinner. It is okay I leave after the speech, no?" You ask Jihoon as you finish revising the script. "Maybe mingle with people a little bit. Behave like a human instead of a broken hearted ghost" he offers, his tone dry as usual. You sigh and shake your head at his reply as you smooth your dress and step forward, waiting for the emcee to call you on stage.
Once on stage, you stand behind the podium, the tireless flashes from the cameras giving you a headache and you have to try your very best to plaster a smile on your face as you greet the guests and start your speech. Jihoon stands a few feet away from you on the stage, his eyes scanning the crowd carefully as he receives constant updates in his Bluetooth. However, not even two minutes into your speech, a man causes commotion as he tries to get on the stage, yelling some nonsense about how you are a fraud and a money launderer. You are baffled as you watch the security planted at the perimeter of the stage get a hold of him and drag him out while whispers and murmurs echo among the guests.
"He looks drunk," Jihoon says as he steps close to you to make sure you are alright. "Ignore him. He shouldn't have been allowed inside. I will have a talk with—" He pauses midway in his sentence as his eyes focus on something behind you, on the other side of the stage, his pupils widening. You can barely process the change in his expression before he tugs you away and shields you with his body as you two roll off the stage.
The next moment, an explosion echoes through the air. There is a ringing in your ears as Jihoon covers you, the echoes of the blast intensifying the headache you already had. You feel disoriented as Jihoon helps you to stand up and ushers you towards the resting room backstage while you hear screams echoing from the guests, their heavy footsteps scattering all over. "Wha- what is going on?" You cry, confused as Jihoon shoves you inside the room. "It is your cousin, Jun."  What!
"Lock the door. His men have blocked the exits. I need to clear them before I come get you. Do not open this door, is that clear?" He orders you and before you can form a reply, he is gone. Confused, scared and exhausted, you fall onto the ground, head in your hands as you fail to wrap your head around the situation. Of course, you knew your cousin was sour after his father's arrest but you never thought he would go this far. What is he thinking? What does he want?
You hear commotion spread outside, things crashing and even a few gunshots. As you step closer to the door to get a better listen there is a loud bang, as if someone is trying to break in.
Absolutely terrified, you step back, frantic eyes looking around the small space for a weapon.
If you knew the night would end up like this you would have brought a fucking gun with you.
Speaking of guns, a gunshot echoes through the air, making you duck your head as you scream. Another gunshot rings through the air and you realise whoever is on the other side is trying to come inside.
You can only pray it is not your fucking cousin, who is a maniac, apparently.
A broad, mean looking thug bursts through the door just as it opens and when his eyes land on you, he points his gun at your head. "Do not think of doing anything smart, woman. If you don't want me to blow your face off, you do as I fucking tell you to." Swallowing, you nod, holding your hands up in surrender.
So this is how it goes down, huh.
The man produces a handcuff from his pocket and tosses it towards you. "Put it on your hands! Now!" With shaky hands, you pick it up and just as you are about to fasten it around one of your wrists, there is a gunshot. You are sure you have been shot as you shut your eyes tight but start to think otherwise when seconds pass and you still feel your heartbeat.
Peeking open one eye you see the thug slumped over on the floor, a clean bullet hole on the back of his head. And in the doorframe, stands Seungcheol, a gun in his hand.
Choi Seungcheol.
Wait, what? How?
Your brain is struggling to catch up as you blink again and again to make sure of his presence. Indeed, he stands there, dressed in a black suit and tie, specks of red on his white shirt as he pants heavily.
What on god's green earth—
"Come on, you need to get out!" He yells, stepping inside the room, reaching for your hand and dragging you outside with him.  You cannot get a word out as you let him lead you, absolutely thunderstruck because of his sudden presence.
What the fuck is he doing here? How did he even know what was going on?
You are so baffled that you cannot speak these thoughts out, simply following him as he carefully guides you towards the exit, his gun drawn in alertness. Just as the backyard of the venue comes into view and Seungcheol is about to usher you outside, you hear a voice yelling from the other side of the hall.
It is your cousin's voice. "Let me go you fucking assholes! I am gonna blow that bitch myself! I am gonna tear her up into fucking pieces! How dare she take what is mine! That's slut! I am gonna…" 
Seungcheol almost pushes you to move as you get stuck in a trance of his mean words. "It is okay, Jihoon has him. Come on."
As if you are functioning on autopilot, you let him guide you outside into the open field and underneath a small sitting area where fresh air finally hits you, letting you breathe in a lungful. Seungcheol informs the other security about the update over his comms as you watch him in silence. When he is done, his eyes finally meet yours and in an instant everything that had gone down in the last month flashes through your head, giving you goosebumps. 
There is a moment of silence as you watch him with a blank expression while he looks around uncomfortably. Finally, he decides to break the silence with a chuckle. "I leave you for a few days and this is what happens?" 
His tone is full of amusement. The nerve of this man. You, however, find none of this amusing. It gets your blood boiling as you hear him say the words, your brain finally registering everything and you simply cannot hold yourself back anymore. The next thing you do is strike a clean, sharp slap on his cheek which catches him off guard as he stumbles a few steps back. His eyes widen in shock, his hand moving to cup the cheek which is turning bright red, like your palm.
You poured your heart and soul and all your pent up emotions into that slap so you pray it stings like a bitch.
Your hand does for sure.
"I deserved that-" Seungcheol starts to speak, holding up his hands but the moment he opens his mouth you are on him again as you grab him by the collars, triggered, "How dare you come here, you scum!" You hiss, tugging at the fabric of his collars while a bewildered Seungcheol tries to gently pry you off of him. "How dare you have the audacity to show up after everything you said?"
"_____, you are gonna hurt yourself—"
"You quit! You made it clear that you had no interest in me, Seungcheol! So what gives you the right to come here and save me, huh?" You are seething, emotions so strong you feel like choking and if you were a cartoon character, visible steam would be coming out of your ears.
"_____, please—"
"Who gave you the right to be a hero, huh? What made you come here? Tell me! Talk, you asshole!" You yell, shaking him, tugging on his collars repeatedly as a wild rage takes over you.
You are going to murder him.
"Because I am in love with you!" He yells back, making your grip falter for a second which he uses to quickly free himself, taking a few steps back as you stare wide eyed at him, panting.
When you finally get enough air in your lungs and process his words, really process them, your wry laugh echoes through the cold night air like mockery. "Fuck you, Seungcheol. I have had enough of your bullshit." You spit, pushed to your limits.
God, give me patience.
"I know," he whispers, taking a step closer while you take one back. "I understand what I have done and I do not expect you to forgive me at all. I just need you to know that I fucking love you and I am so fucking sorry. I know I am late but I am here to stay—"
"No you are not," You snap. "Get the hell away from me before I take a gun and fucking shoot you." 
"If that's what will make you happy..." Seungcheol calmly reaches for his gun as you watch him, alarmed. He takes it off of the holster and holds it out towards you. "Shoot me as many times as you want. I deserve it.
This fucking man—
"Guys, can we do this weird foreplay somewhere else," Jihoon yells from behind you as you spin to see him jogging towards you two. "You need to get out of here, _____. He's saying that there are still explosives in this compound."
"What!" You shriek but before you can get another word out, Seungcheol is grabbing your hand and dragging you with him as he starts sprinting. "Keep me updated," he addresses Jihoon who nods, talking into the comm to get a car at the rear entrance for you.
"Let go, you asshole!" You hiss, trying to pry his fingers off your wrist which proves to be a challenge while running full speed in high heels. "God damn it, Seungcheol, I will fall!" And you almost do so, as you misstep and stumble but the man is quick to catch you and before you can even think, he is throwing you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.  "Put me down, you pig!"
"As soon as we get to the car, angel."
Which is quick, thankfully, because the next moment he is putting you down and holding the passenger side door open for you and despite wanting to resist him, you know the wise idea is to leave right now.  As soon as you are inside the car, he shuts the door before running to the other side and before you can even put your seatbelt on, the car is moving.
"Jihoon will be fine, right?" You ask half mindedly as you turn your head back to look at the venue which gets smaller every passing second. "He will be fine," Seungcheol grunts. "The police have been informed as well as the bomb disposal team." "What about my cousin?" Seungcheol remains quiet for a moment, only staring ahead on the road. "Him? He's  alive, unfortunately."
"What do you mean?" You ask warily.
"I shot him. The bullet hit his abdomen. He won't die, don't worry. That depraved asshole doesn't deserve that mercy." You sigh, rubbing your temples as you lean back into your seat. "What the hell was he thinking?"
"He wanted to hurt you, humiliate you, _____. He had plans to hurt you horribly." Seungcheol huffs out a breath, shaking his head and clenching his jaw. "He has gone insane." That is all he provides, making you fall silent for a moment. "When will this stop." You whisper to yourself. "I never considered him to be a threat."
"I should have. You locked up his father and made sure he could never take over the company. He was a huge threat that I failed to notice." He murmurs.
"Don't start, Seungcheol," you snap at him, irritated. "I'm still tempted to shoot you. Your duty was over the moment you handed in the resignation letter and walked out of my life."
"My biggest mistake." He whispers to himself but you hear it. 
Tired, frustrated, scared and angry, you decide not to engage in this conversation further as you look out the window and wonder what is coming next.  Another media storm for sure.  More interrogations, more meetings with your lawyer.  At the same time, however, the edge that you have been feeling for the last week is gone. The fact that your cousin never came up to you or tried to retaliate his father's arrest in any way made you wonder but it never occurred to you that he could turn violent, insane. 
Jun was after all a puppet, who only did things after his father made the way for him his whole life.
Today was a different case, it looks like. Anyhow, it is somewhat of a win for you because you miraculously got out unscathed and the threat has been neutralised. However, you are sure many have been injured and your reputation has taken a severe hit today. The upcoming months will be very hard, harder than before…
The next coherent thought that comes upon you is that you fell asleep. You open your eyes realising that the car has stopped and the time on the dashboard says about thirty minutes have passed. Blinking, you shift in your seat and find Seungcheol, sitting next to you, watching you with a look that is foreign on his face, something close to adoration. Clearing your throat, you remove your seatbelt and sit up straight.
"How long was I asleep?"
"Not long enough. We just got here." He announces as he moves to open his door. "Come on, let's go inside."
Once you are out of the car, you realise Seungcheol has taken you to a five star hotel and seeing the confusion on your face, he explains. "It's safer here. Can't take any more risks tonight."
He casually slips his hand into yours, making you frown and drags you towards the hotel. Your tired body cannot put up much of a fight so you follow him begrudgingly and you are quickly escorted to the penthouse suite thanks to his prior booking.
Upon entering the suite you walk straight to the master bedroom where the king sized bed calls for your tired self as you sit down and take off your heels, throwing them away on the carpet over the floor with a soft thud, exhaling a loud sigh. Seungcheol follows you and remains quiet as you sit in silence at the edge of the bed, too wired, too disoriented to do anything. Normally, after everything that happened with your uncle your decision making skills have significantly sharpened but having Seungcheol near you, his stupid confession ringing in your head is fucking with your brain. And as if that goddamn man can read your mind, he kneels in front of you on the floor, one of his hands softly touching your knees as he utters. "You need to rest, ______. I will handle everything else. It is all under control now, trust me."
"Why do you do this?" You croak, pushed to the limits of exhaustion, your eyes trained somewhere in an unfocused gaze as you fidget with your hands. "Why do you push me away and then come back running at a time like this?"
He is silent for a long time while you fight to keep your tears at bay.
You will not cry in front of him.
"I am sorry." He only whispers, his fingers softly stroking your knee as his head lowers and his gaze falls down on the floor. "I was foolish and...scared. That night after we slept together you…you said out loud you loved me and I panicked. I was— I am a danger to you. But being away from you for a week was a pain unlike anything else. I went back to that cabin and I slept in your bed and the sheets had the faintest of your smell. Weirdly, your scent and everything you left behind soothed me and I didn't have any nightmares in the past week. But every morning I woke up and there was a sinking feeling in my stomach that only grew each day until I couldn't bear it. I realised that you really were an angel who saved me, brought lightness back into my life, and gave me a new purpose, a new dream. I realised what an idiot I was and I came to the city on Wednesday night. Believe me when I tell you that my intention was to just stay away and make sure you are okay. I knew what I had done and I was in no way worthy of showing up in front of you but I had to intervene tonight, _____. Your life was in danger."
The air conditioner in your room suddenly feels chillier as goosebumps prickle your skin, making you shiver. Seungcheol takes notice of it and stands up quickly to take off his jacket before draping it over your shoulders. He stands in front of you in silence, fingers hovering over your now covered shoulders while you stare at his shoes, your head going blank but also running a mile a minute. The frustration and overwhelmingness bleed together until you can't tell one emotion separate from another.
All of a sudden, Seungcheol's thumbs caress your cheeks while the rest of his fingers softly cup your jaw and it is only then that you realise you have been silently crying. He oh so gently wipes your cheek dry while uttering, "Please don't cry. I know I hurt you. I promise I will leave as soon as I make sure you are going to be okay." Instantly, a part inside your brain is flooded with panic as it screams no. You don't want him to leave when you remember how hard the past week was on you and how many times a day you would revisit that night in the cabin, the moment you two shared and how it proved to be the anchor for you throughout everything that happened after.
You were— are mad at him but you still want him near, crazy is it not?
You keep thinking of how safe you felt the moment Seungcheol found you in tonight's chaos, how just his presence made you fall asleep so easily when for the last week you could not fall asleep without the fear of nightmares.
Yes, they have returned. But you don't see the accident anymore, you see your uncle chasing you around the cabin while you call for Seungcheol but he doesn't come, no matter how much you beg.
And after tonight, you wonder what more nightmares await you. So when you utter the one, very powerful word, you tell yourself that you are doing this for yourself, to be selfish and not for him, which is not a lie entirely. 
"No."
Your left hand reaches to grab the fabric of his shirt and you fist it tightly in your hand. "Don't leave."  You don't dare to look at him, scared you will break once you do and instead focus your gaze on the patterns of the carpet while holding onto his shirt. The next moment Seungcheol is sitting next to you and in the moment after he gently wraps his arms around you, your head falling perfectly against his shoulder while your arms snake around his waist after a moment's hesitation. 
His warm touch soothes your back as his other hand cups the back of your head, softly stroking it with his thumb. A small whimper comes from your mouth as quiet sobs escape from you and you hide your face and weep, trying to stifle the sounds.
"I am so sorry, _____. I am sorry for everything." Seungcheol whispers, voice thick with emotion. "I will make everything better, I promise. I will stay as long as you need me and then… " There is a moment of heavy pause. "When you don't, I will follow you around like a lost puppy for the rest of my life." Thinking about the rest of your life and not having Seungcheol in it makes you sob harder and if you had energy you would scream at him and tell him to just shut up. Instead, you cry, cry your heart out, promising yourself that from tomorrow you won't. 
Tomorrow another battle begins. 
As the night grows deeper, Seungcheol holds you tighter and your sobs gradually fade and before you know it you fall asleep on his shoulder. Seungcheol stays still for a while longer to make sure you don't wake up before gently picking up your sleeping form and setting you down on the bed, fixing the pillow underneath your head and covering you with a blanket. Despite his desire to crawl into bed and sleep next to you, he resists it and instead takes the loveseat in front of the window, where he sits and watches your peacefully sleeping form, before falling asleep himself with a heart full of gratitude.
— You watch the steam from the mug evaporate into the air before taking a small sip. The tea is slightly bitter and hot, just as you need it.
After waking up and taking a quick shower, here you sit, by the window of your penthouse suite, sipping tea, treating yourself to a quiet peaceful moment before your hectic day, which you are frankly not prepared for, begins. 
You woke up to an empty suite, with no sign of Seungcheol and it almost made you wonder if last night was an entire elaborate dream. But then you found his tie lying on the loveseat which acted as a reassurance of his presence, weirdly bringing solace to you. 
After waking up, you realised your phone's battery is dead, which became another source of peace for you, because you know otherwise, it would have been blowing up with calls and you wouldn't have gotten the good night's sleep that you got. 
There's a sudden sound of the door opening that alerts you, making you crane your neck to see the visitor. Seungcheol walks in, dressed completely differently from last night, looking delicious in a light blue polo and white pants. On his hands are two shopping bags and behind him is a hotel staff member who pushes in a huge breakfast trolley. "Good morning, _____." Seungcheol meets your eye as he sets down the shopping bags on the edge of the bed and thanks the staff as he takes his leave.  You watch Seungcheol take off the lids covering the food while speaking, "Breakfast is here. I have asked for a bit of everything you like. And I have got new clothes and some necessities for you. They are in the bag," He points to the general direction as he starts stacking pancakes on a plate for you. You are quite surprised and flattered and you cannot come up with anything else to say but, "Thank you."
For some weird reason, you feel shy and awkward around him as if you are a newborn fawn. Maybe it is because none of you are addressing the elephant in the room; last night's conversation and instead acting like you have known each other for years. "It's my pleasure," he smiles at you, a genuine smile that shows his dimples and makes your heart gallop like a horse. Handing you the plate, he takes a comfortable seat in the chair in front of you and watches you dig in, a look you can only describe as fondness sitting on his face. Feeling shy, you cover your mouth as you chew. "Stop looking at me." 
"You look a bit tired. Did you not sleep well?" He asks suddenly.  "I had a good sleep, thank you." You inform, surprised how he noticed.  You have been feeling a little sick after you woke up despite having a very good night's rest. A headache has been creeping up on your temples but you are trying hard to ignore it because this is not the time to get sick.
You have a long day ahead of you.
Making you jerk, Seungcheol places his palm on your forehead out of the blue as he checks your temperature and an unpleasant look settles on his face. "You are getting a fever." "No, I'm not." You direct your focus on cutting your pancakes, using too much pressure. Ignoring you, the man dials a number on his phone and asks for some cold medicine to be brought to the hotel room to whoever is on the other side. "I just told you, I am fine." You frown, annoyed. He hangs up and stares at you as if you are speaking a different language. "You are not. You need to take the medicine and get some rest."
"Now is not the time for me to sleep! Do not play doctor!" You snap, setting the plate down with a loud bang as you clutch the fork and knife tightly in your hand. Seungcheol does not react to your outburst but simply changes position as he comes to sit next to you.
"Your cousin is in custody. I talked with your lawyer this morning, he is preparing everything well. There is no way he is getting off. Jihoon and his men already testified to the police so you do not have to meet with them unless you want to add something. If you do, I will arrange a phone call with the station. The legal department is working on a statement and it will be released today in a press conference. The CFO will read it out." He informs, casually. 
"You are sick, _____. And it's okay .You went through a lot. It is okay if you take a break today. No one is asking you to go out there and face the demons. You need to rest. Your body is asking for it." 
His voice softens as one of his hands comes to rest on your thigh gently. The assurance in his voice paired with the tenderness in his eyes makes you swallow a lump in your throat and blink back tears. "Still..."
"Finish your breakfast." He says as he reaches for the plate while taking the fork and knife out of your hand and cutting it into bite sized pieces. "And you should probably call your brother today, by the way. The news of last night's events will reach him sooner or later and I think it would be best if he heard it from you."
You nod, feeling sad. Chan just left for a vacation one week ago. When he hears about this, he will definitely catch the next flight home.
"If you do not want to call him, I can do it for you." Seungcheol offers as he finishes his task and hands the plate and cutlery back to you.
"No, I will do it." You murmur and silently go back to eating. Seungcheol watches you in silence for the rest of the meal and after you are done, the staff returns to clean up and drops your medicines. You take them and then sit in your bed idly, watching the city skyline through your window, trying not to overthink anything. You can hear Seungcheol talk over the phone in the other room before he steps back into the master bedroom to check up on you.
"If you feel too sick, let me know. I will take you to the hospital." 
You softly nod and turn your head to look at him. He appears worried, his eyes glazed with concern, his brows forming a knot as if he's trying to read you. After a moment, you silently motion him to come sit by you on the bed which he diligently follows. 
His hands reach out to hold yours, his thumb gently stroking your skin as he gazes into your eyes, leaning closer to you, his eyes searching for something in yours. His bangs fall forward, cupping his temples and you itch to brush them away.  "Tell me what you are thinking." He whispers.
"You have pretty hair." You reply honestly and he chuckles, shaking his head before his face becomes serious.  "I missed you." His voice is low, almost inaudible as his gaze falls down to your linked hands, as if he is ashamed to meet your eyes when saying that. "I missed you too." You reply honestly, once again. Seungcheol seems surprised to hear that and you cannot help but roll your eyes.
"Oh please, Choi Seungcheol. Don't act like you had no idea." Your head rests against the headboard as you make yourself comfortable and scowl at him. "You knew very well how much effect you had on me and you knew damn well how much I loved you."
"Loved me?"
"Okay, love you—"
"Wait, no— you...love me? Really? You didn't say it that night in the heat of the moment?" You only realise then how you just casually spat it out, again, and immediately, heat blooms on your face. You avoid his gaze, snatching your hands from his grip while he looks absolutely stunned.
"Whatever." You mutter, scooting down on the bed, reaching to grab the sheets and hide yourself in them but Seungcheol stops you as he cages you between his arms, his face hovering dangerously close to yours, his perfume and aftershave blending into an addictive scent that makes your brain hazy with need.
Control yourself, woman! "Answer me. You love me?" "Ugh, you heard me the first time," you groan, trying to twist away from him but he stops you by cupping your chin and making you face him. 
"Wanna know something?" He whispers, inching his face closer.
"What?" You are breathless.
"I love you too, ____." He replies, his lips ghosting over yours. You anticipate a kiss but he doesn't, instead tucks your hair behind your ear as he whispers in your ear. "I am so deeply, madly in love with you it is embarrassing."
The words are music to your ears and your insides swoon as you close your eyes and relish them, pressing your lips tight to prevent yourself from breaking into a maniacal grin. Seungcheol shifts his weight back and rests himself on his one palm as his other hand softly cups your face. "And I am sorry, once again, for what I did to you."
"Good but I am still mad." You try your best to appear stern.
"I know." His expression is solemn. "I plan on making it up to you until my dying breath."
When did he become so romantic?
"You may start by cuddling me," you whisper, almost shy, carefully watching his reaction. He immediately proceeds to get under the sheets with you and carefully engulfs you into his large arms, your face resting against his solid chest as his hand strokes your hair soothingly. Your arms move to snake around his waist as you feel yourself relax, his arms feeling like the safest, most comfortable place in the entire universe and you never, ever want to leave.
"I love you, Seungcheol." Your voice is muffled against his chest.
"I love you more, angel. So much more."
1 month later 
The view around the cabin is just as pretty as you remember it. The setting sun of dusk casts it in a beautiful glow which you stop and stand to admire. 
Beside you, Seungcheol finishes parking the jeep and unloads the overnight bags from the trunk. 
"What are you looking at?" He asks when he comes to stand next to you, fishing for keys from his pocket in one hand.
"It's very beautiful." You murmur, eyes glancing over the view before settling down on the man next to you. He is dressed in a grey t-shirt, his blond hair looking as gorgeous as ever, if not more in the golden hour and you know, he is undoubtedly the epitome of beauty. 
Seungcheol meets your stare with equal sincerity as he reaches to hold your hand, whispering. "Yes, it is." You know he is talking about you.
A light, gleeful laugh escapes your lips as you playfully push him with your shoulder. He grins and drags you with him inside the cabin.
It is hard to believe that this place was a crime scene about a month ago. Seungcheol did some thorough renovations and now the place looks more beautiful, cozier than ever.
As much as your heart wishes to stay in this little piece of green heaven forever, this is a small weekend getaway that Seungcheol organised and initiated by picking you up early from work today. You did not complain because the past few weeks were tough.
Getting your company back together after the fundraiser's incident and making sure you are still in the market is taking a lot of well thought plans and manpower and instructions. You have help, of course, from Chan who immediately rushed home from his vacation when he heard about Jun's attack on you. Seungcheol also has been helping you a lot, though you officially denied him the position of your bodyguard. 
He then started working as a security consultant at his friend's company and has been assisting you however he could throughout the past month. He also started therapy again and so far his progress is remarkable. He is a lot less self sabotaging and he has not had a nightmare ever since you got back together, much like you. Not to mention he has been working extra hard to make it up to you, always catering to your every little need and never asking for anything in return or initiating anything, even though you have noticed multiple times how his eyes trail you around hungrily. 
So far, you have only rewarded him with kisses because it was too much fun to watch him silently suffer.  However, you plan to change that this weekend.
"Let's watch the sunset together," you propose as Seungcheol drops your bags in the bedroom. He agrees and you two walk back outside to the patio, hands linked where you stand and gaze at the setting sun. Seungcheol's arms wrap around you protectively from behind and his chin comes to rest on your shoulder.
"We need to get groceries." He murmurs absentmindedly as he presses a soft kiss on your neck that makes you sigh in pleasure. You hum, offering that you could just order takeout. As the sun dips beneath the horizon, Seungcheol takes occasional peeks at your face, admiring the mesmerised look in your eyes. His heart beats loudly, wild in love as he imagines the rest of his life with you and how it would be to watch you watch the sunset.
Delightful. Like the delightful secret he is hiding. A huge secret that has been burning holes in his pocket for a month.  After the night of the attack, the next morning when he went to shop for your clothes at the mall, a ring caught his eye in a jewellery store and he purchased it right there, intent on putting it on your finger someday.
He has been carrying it ever since, waiting for the perfect moment to get down on one knee.  Maybe this weekend will carry that moment, maybe not.
Either way, it is fine. He is not in a rush. He knows he will get down on one knee when he deems himself worthy enough of you. Though, logically it might never happen because no one is worthy of a person as beautiful, as amazing as you. But he will work very hard to be worthy of you, now and every day that he has on this planet. Seungcheol smiles to himself, agreeing that he's a very lucky bastard. "Cheol?" You call him by his nickname, breaking his train of thought. "Hm?" "I love you." You whisper. His next words are the sweetest serenade. "I love you more, angel."
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A/N: If you have made it this far, congratulations and a huge thank you for taking the time to read this mammoth of a fic! I genuinely put my blood, sweat and tears into this and believe me when I tell you that my wrists hurt like hell. Still, I am glad I could share this with the world and I'm very proud of myself for successfully putting the conjectural idea from my head to the paper. It took a lot of time to come up with the idea, finalize it and stitch the pieces together so please leave a review and reblog! Your thoughts and comments really make my day. Wishing you a happy October! As a side note, I am swearing off of writing fics over 20k words. When I tell you that this app whopped my ass while posting this! My god! I was seriously considering breaking it into two parts. If you are reading this now that means I have hopefully posted it without trouble. Anyway, toodles!
© startlightxsvt 2023 | All rights reserved. Do not copy, repost, translate, adapt, or repurpose any of my works.
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alwaysshallow · 6 months
Text
― blood on my shirt, rose in my hand
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SUMMARY: Simon Riley knows you have bad experiences with dating, but he also knows you don't really need no one but him. He's gonna provide you anything. So you can imagine how he could change, when for the first time, you think you've found the one man who's right for you. To your surprise, weird events happen during the time you date Nick. Thankfully, Simon's there to help you. (11,4k)
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A/N: this is SUCH a long piece, so some of it is here, but the full version is on AO3. i hope you're gonna forgive me for this one </3
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"It's not like I'm ugly, right? I thought about it. If I'm ugly, so that's why it doesn't work out." you sip your favorite wine, looking right at your best friend, who has been listening for the past hour your ramblings about dating.
"You're fuckin' stupid, but not ugly, pet."
He's the best friend in the world – you can say this, meaning it with your whole heart. In fact, he's the best friend everyone probably wished to have, at least in your mind. Not only here for you, but loyal, you can tell him basically anything. He wouldn't say a thing, even if someone was nagging, and he was mostly a good adviser; all the qualities you looked for in a best friend, right?
And he was brutally honest, like right now, but you don't mind it. Simon Riley had this thing, and even if sometimes you were almost offended at his bluntness (like this one time, when he told you you're a crying mess and you act… worse than a toddler), you mostly appreciated it. Your other friends couldn't compare to his honesty, this man was not the one to lick your ass.
Or, so you thought.
"Excuse me?" you raise your eyebrow, laughing, while shaking your head. "You should, I don't know, tell me I'm amazing and they don't deserve me. Or so." you joke; it causes him to roll his eyes.
"That's what I told you. Different words, but the same thingy."
"Right."
It sometimes sucks for you that Simon isn't a girl. He has this unbelieveably annoying guy thing, where he just can't be delusional with you, and he can't just mourn over some hot guy. His way of thinking is… on the other level, he totally skips the mourn part, the part that is pathetic; he's just saying things like "move on" and "there's a lot of them anyway". Again, you love it, but you really wish you could cry about guy being so pretty that it hurts, without him rolling his eyes.
Yet, when you're more in mad mood than mourning one, his attiude is just perfect. He's the one to encourage you to scream, he even brought you a few times to rage room when you needed to smash a few things, not to mention the attiude he was setting you in. Powerful, not giving a shit about a "piece of a man that doesn't deserve you".
Simon sighs. "You're worryin' too much. Really that desperate?"
You huff, as you sink more into the plushy couch in your apartment. "I'm not desperate. It's just…" you take a few seconds to think "being love starved."
"Sex starved, you mean."
"Love starved." you send him a look.
"Mhm. You fancy plushies, hugs, and all shite like this?"
"You're so fucking British, it hurts" you laugh. "Yeah. Yeah, I want something like this. Someone to hold me, someone that cares about me and I know it. Sex comes in package, of course, but it's just… ugh, I want a man" you groaned.
You feel as pathetic as ever, when Simon doesn't respond – because how exactly should he? He wasn't vocal about things like this, he usually just nod his head, and there it was, another topic. A miracle it was that he was already listening to your date rambling, not cutting it off because he was uncomfortable or something.
Dreams about your love life… more girly conversation.
Mostly – you know guys who loved talking about it, obviously, and you adore it pretty much, especially when you can know their perspective on some things, but… Riley wasn't really one of them. He had "simple hookups" as he said one day, when you asked him about doing double-dates. It wasn't even an option, he just liked to ocassionally fuck and that's all.
So you stopped trying a few months ago for a double-date. Instead, you focused more on finding a man that would meet your expectations at least in the middle, and that was exhausting, to be honest. Tinder dates were just a disaster after disaster – if it wasn't some catfish, a guy that wanted to marry you and have kids after two weeks of writing, it was most definitely a guy with a desire to bang you quickly.
Romance was dead these days, you noticed. That wouldn't keep you away from trying to find someone, though. Patience was a key in things like these.
"Maybe you will set me up with one your friends? It wouldn't suck. You know them." you think out loud.
"Definitely too much wine f'you." Simon takes your glass, and pours all of the liquid to his mouth, swallowing it like it was some kind of juice, not alcohol. "You don't want a guy from military in your life. Trust me."
There's some sternness to his tone, at which you raise your eyebrow. It was just a funny comment from your side, nothing else – you know by the heart that this man doesn't like the idea of connecting his two worlds. "I know, Simon. Just joking, right?"
You place a hand on his. It's a comedic, yet, heartwarming view, when you see the size difference.
"And, you're pretty cool for a military guy."
He huffs. It seems like pretty cool offends him, but he doesn't say it out loud, so it can be only your imagination working. "You met me before I enlisted. 's different."
"How different?"
"You knew me before military."
He doesn't give you another answer that night, nor the continuation of this one – he brushes you off, like you are some kind of bug that is disturbing him, and brings up another topic, about his deployment. He asks if you can watch his apartment when he's gone, take care of it; it's stupid, Simon knows that you will always agree, but it's the need of asking you anyway.
And, he likes coming home, where he can smell your perfume, where he can see that you made some changes. You tend to do that a lot, mostly buying stuff to his apartment. "It looks worse than room in the hospital" you always say, when he cocks his eyebrow with amusement. He doesn't say that, but he finds it really adorable that you care so much, to make his space… cozier, even if he's not really attached to it. Mostly, it's for your comfort when you come to visit him, and that happens a lot; not like he minds it. Anyone else would be banned from his apartment, but you? Oh God, you wouldn't be, not in the milion years.
You could probably be the worst ever to him; call him names, punch, anything, and he would still be your Simon. It's what he was used to, to being by your side, no matter what time, no matter if you were in the good mood or not; your presence was everything to him.
Not like he'd ever confess that, but it is what you know, silently.
Yet, you are so good to him. Always sending him letters or texting him when he is on deployment. A couple of times, you sent him little things too, if he forgot something, photos included too, but new ones; mostly you captured views, but you were here once or twice. His happiness may not be that visible to outsiders, but his heart is full every time.
"My girl", he'd tell boys when they saw a polaroid of you, swiftly tucking it into his vest because no one was allowed to see it more than three seconds.
Often, Gaz joked if you are actually his girl even if you're not dating, but it sounded so bizzare to Ghost. How would you not be his? Thirteen years of friendship counted as something beyond being only his best friend, no? At least in his mind it was like this. He was used to you dating briefly other guys, but it lasted maybe a few months top. Nothing serious, probably his hookups were more meaningful than your relationships.
So you can easily imagine his confusion, when your mutual friends tell him big news about your new object of interest; someone that he doesn't even know yet, but he's not really his fan on the beggining.
It was just a month of being away.
His eyes are on you now; you are embarrassed, looking anywhere but at him. You don't even speak, you just wave your hand in dismissive manner, trying to change the topic because you don't really want to talk about it. Not in the presence of your best friend, at least.
It works for everyone but Simon, and you know it by the way he looks at you, processing what he just heard. Changing a topic, sudden talkativeness from your side is like buying time in that, time precious to think what to say to your best friend later on.
Because you know for the fact that he'll ask. He always does, and now he has a reason.
You have your reasons why you haven't told him. "It's nothing serious. That's why I didn't tell you." your voice is a little more silent than usual, but he can hear it anyway. You two are taking a walk to your apartment with no one around; and it's awkward one.
Simon seems like he doesn't want to say anything about your poor choice of men. It worries you; he always wanted somehow to make fun of you or make comment. Now, it's just a nod, like he gets it, but you know it's not it. He doesn't get it.
But you don't know what it is.
"C'mon!" you nudge him, and when it doesn't seem to affect him, you stand right in front of him. A little wobbly because of alcohol, your vision isn't so great too, but it makes him stop in his tracks. "Say something."
"Somethin'" he grumbles, and you can't help but roll your eyes. "What? Told me-"
"-I know what I told you!" you cup his face in your hands. Your head is a bit hazy, but the intensions are clear; making him talk and soft. It always works, so you have a lot of hope. "He's a good guy, but I want to meet him a bit closer to be… certain about him, you know? You've heard me whining about boys a bit too much."
"You can tell me everything." he muses, and you can't help but smile at that. Of course – of course you can tell him everything. You never doubted it for a second, and you think of yourself as stupid, doubting that he wouldn't want to hear about it. "Ill be the judge of that, though. Good guy thing."
"I can't be trusted?" you tease, and when he lets out a low chuckle, you grin even more. It's like a reward after him being his grumpy self.
"No." he shakes his head. "You don't know what is good for you. But that's why I'm here."
Under the influence of alcohol, you didn't pay too much of attention to his words; probably you wouldn't pay attention to it even if he'd say this when you are sober. Simon as your protector – it's so natural, you don't even need to think about it as something weird. It's just the way things are for thirteen years, everyone knows this.
Your friends, who were a bit reluctant on the beggining, but two parties later, when he joined the competition of drinking on time and wasn't drunk at all, he won over their hearts.
It was tougher with your parents, when you were in highschool. A little distanced at first, they constantly asked where were his parents (which, you told them, was rude asking, especially to his face), telling you how much of a bad news he could be for you. Suggestion of him ruining your future was the worst, you never thought of him this way; that discussion caused you to give them the silent treatment for a few days.
Apparently after that, suggesting that Simon is around you too much, clinging to your side and giving you "weird glances", they stopped the narrative, admitting that the boy might be damaged, but not broken. You still felt like they're judging their every move, but seeing that he had pretty good life plan, seeing that he thought about military and went here actually? Hell, they completely stopped being suspicious in any means.
Riley just had this thing of charming people, even if they didn't like him in the beggining. He had everything under his finger, trying to keep things under control – it was like that… pretty much since the beggining of his life. You met him when he was an adult, but he always liked to keep things under control; people, things that he cared about. What belonged to him was sacred, untouchable for anyone else.
The possessiveness started in his early childhood with toys, when he absolutely despised everyone who just wanted to touch his things, to lay their dirty, filthy fingers here. In early classes, it was considered just rude.
When he was older though, he started fighting for various things. Knowing he has the advantage, he used his legs, fists, when he had to, and no one was looking, besides the actual victim. He wasn't stupid; he knew how troublesome the public can be, he also knew the power of manipulation a bit too well to get caught so easily. Wasn't the plan, getting caught; it once happened, but because he wanted to; he even broke his own nose, making it like the other guy did it, just to get what he needed. The reputation of kid who was broken in the childhood, so he's just not opening on others was… suitable, for him. No one could suspect anything, especially when the kid just happened to be "attacked" by one of the popular ones, right?
The idea of power was something that Simon truly desired from the beggining; maybe it has something to do with the lack of his parents in his life, being transferred from one foster family to another. Maybe it's just him being a little fucked up – who knows.
What mattered, was the fact he had you. You, so sweet, so considerate to be by his side, to be protected by him, to be the person who "opened" because of her. Little did you know, he opened just because he wanted to be closer to you, not those fuckers you hang out with.
If you knew his past, you would have another reasons in mind, why he showed up to meet your potential new boyfriend. Jealousy, posessiveness, power complex, him being a control freak who can't give you to anyone he personally doesn't trust – if ever, considering you were his precious best friend. He isn't willing to share.
You aren't really aware of him being this crazy. You think of his flaws, and you see someone that has been damaged, someone that you can and will help, if he just asks for it – or if you'll see he needs it. So, naturally, you help, and grin the widest you can, when you see him in the door. He shows completely unexpected. It doesn't take you long to wrap your hands around his neck, tight, as you hug him.
Happy as always because you can see your friend, happy as ever because moments like these means a lot to you. When he's deployed, you can't even see him, so you're taking all in when he's right in front of you.
"Hope 'm not interruptin'." he murmurs into your hair, as his head is practically buried in them; he has to bend down a little to be at your level, but it's something he enjoys. The power.
"Never." you say immediately, not even hesitating in your statement. "Actually, you found a pretty good moment."
"That I did, eh?" his eyebrow arches, as he straightens up.
"As always. Nick's here, you have to meet him."
|READ THE REST ON AO3|
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blue-jasmine2yas · 2 years
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Maybe I’m reliving a past trauma?
#is that what it is?#I'm quite frankly not handling the weight of my own consciousness very well. I forget all my jokes. what if I forget something great. I have#gaps in my memory. supposed arrogance aside; there is continuity to my day. it's just bits. bits. bit after bit; after#bit. and cut up. so my day isn't in a straight line. there's the thing that'll happen; and then there is after it. well-- first; there is ev#ery thing before it. and that is all well and good. but after? not good. very not good. it feels bad. and I can't stop time. I can't remembe#r anything. time keeps moving forward. and i can't remember what happened at the time of the thing. I can't remember what happened before it#and I can't move on. I'm stuck. is this mania. it can't be. I hardly feel happy. (but it definitely has some qualities of it) so we needn't#ake things too literally.#mania. flight; unease; unrest#; too much all at once. basically. I'm afraid my brain is picking things to be anxious about. it's no longer just one thing in particular. i#t's everything; everything is a danger. everything is traumatizing. everything surrounding us is a threat to our safety. and is the reason r#eal; or made up. I don't know. I just know it fucking sucks. to say the least. I was doing fine. and then a thing happened. why did it have#to happen. I don't know. a person sighing at you; just ruining your peace. noise. disrupting your mental processes. that's all it is; mental#processes disturbed. that's all it is really. ~#it's too much to handle. one thing after another. no way to cope. accept or agress. what do I do. and when you're coping with one thing; and#then another thing happens. what do you do then? do you worry? there isn't anything to do. it wasn't supposed to fucking happen. ~
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phillydilly · 7 months
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Priorities
⊹♡— In which Charles and his long distance girlfriend get into an argument over her priorities
Part 1 , Part 2
Charles Leclerc x fem!reader
Warnings: arguing, angst
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Charles had been counting down the days until his planned trip to London to visit his girlfriend, Y/n. They had been in a long-distance relationship for a while, and every moment together was cherished. Charles had meticulously planned the weekend, envisioning romantic strolls through Hyde Park and candlelit dinners at their favorite restaurants.
As Charles sat in the bustling Nice airport, his excitement was palpable. The engine-like roar of the airplanes outside seemed to echo his racing heartbeats. He checked his watch, anticipating the moment when he would finally board the flight to London.
Meanwhile, Y/n, a dedicated business manager at a prestigious firm in London, had been juggling her hectic work schedule with the anticipation of Charles's visit. She had managed to free up her weekend, or so she thought, ensuring that they would have quality time together.
Just as Charles was about to board the plane, Y/n's name flashed on his phone's screen. He smiled and answered, expecting her warm and excited voice on the other end. But the voice that greeted him was strained and filled with regret.
"Charles," Y/n began, her tone hesitant, "I have some bad news."
His heart sank as he clutched the phone tighter, "What's wrong, amour? Are you okay?"
Y/n sighed, "I've just been told that I have back-to-back meetings scheduled for the entire weekend. I can't believe it, but I won't be able to do any of the fun things you had planned."
Charles's excitement turned to frustration, and he couldn't hide his disappointment. "You knew I was coming, Y/n. We've been looking forward to this for weeks. How can you let work take precedence over us?"
Y/n's voice quivered, "It's not that simple, Charles. I have commitments, and my job is important. You know that."
Frustration simmered in Charles's voice, "I understand your job is important, but so is our relationship, Y/n. I've been looking forward to this weekend for so long, and now you're telling me it's all off?"
Y/n tried to explain, "I tried to rearrange my schedule, but these meetings are critical. I can't just bail on them."
Charles clenched his jaw, struggling to keep his emotions in check. "So, what? I just drive back to Monaco and pretend like everything's fine?"
Y/n's voice trembled with guilt, "No, Charles, please. We can still spend time together in the evenings after my meetings. It won't be the weekend we planned, but we can make the most of it."
Charles felt a wave of frustration wash over him. He had been looking forward to this weekend with Y/n, a break from the high-speed world of Formula 1. "I can't believe you're doing this, Y/n. I thought we meant more to each other than this."
Tears welled up in Y/n's eyes as she pleaded, "Charles, please try to understand. I never wanted this to happen, but sometimes work just takes over. I love you, and I want to make this work."
Charles, his patience wearing thin, snapped, "Love isn't just words, Y/n. It's actions. And right now, your actions are telling me that work comes before us. I'll talk to you later." With that, he hung up the phone, his anger boiling over.
He walked away from the gate, his luggage in hand, and returned to his car. Charles sat in the driver's seat, tears threatening to stream down his face. The frustration and disappointment he felt were overwhelming. He had been so excited about spending time with Y/n, and now it felt like a dream shattered.
As he drove away from the airport, Charles's mind was a whirlwind of emotions. The engine's roar provided a stark contrast to the turmoil in his heart. He had never expected such a turn of events. Y/n had always been understanding of his career's demands, but now it seemed like she was prioritizing her work over their relationship.
Hours passed, and Charles's tears had given way to a deep sadness. He replayed the argument in his head, wondering if he had been too harsh on Y/n. He loved her deeply, and he didn't want to lose her, but she had really hurt him. He knew he himself wasn��t always available, but they had planned this for weeks, he felt that his frustration was justified.
Back in London, Y/n sat in her office, tears streaming down her face. She had never seen Charles so angry and hurt. She knew she had let him down, but the demands of her job were relentless. She had hoped he would understand, but now she feared she might have pushed him away.
Unable to focus on her work, Y/n picked up her phone and dialed Charles's number. It went straight to voicemail. She left a heartfelt message, "Charles, I'm so sorry for everything. Please, let's talk this through. I love you more than anything."
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anonymous-dentist · 1 month
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Or: Cellbit runs an alchemy shop with his family, and he's also the lost prince of the Gato Kingdom, but he isn't, but he really really isn't, you've gotta believe him, he isn't, really, he isn't, you've gotta-
For day seven of @smallchaoscryptid's Spiderbit Week - Royalty/Family
-
The day starts off normally:
Cellbit wakes up to find himself alone in bed, Roier having already gone to work downstairs in the store.
He lazes beneath the covers before hearing his son shouting in the other room. Grudgingly, he gets up, slides on his slippers and his bathrobe, and he goes to get Richarlyson settled with a new coloring book because, according to Richarlyson, Pepito ate the last one.
(Pepito did not eat the last one.)
Cellbit goes back into his bedroom to change, and then he goes to the wash basin in the hallway to brush his teeth and wash his face. He goes to the kitchen, shoves a singe slice of bread in his mouth for breakfast, tells the kids to behave, decides to live in ignorance and believe that they actually listened to him, and then, finally, he goes downstairs to help Roier with the shop.
That's when things get weird because, instead of the normal dozen or so customers they usually get in the mornings before things get busy, there are a handful of people in shiny armor with pointy swords, and there's a woman with cat ears leaning against the counter talking at an indifferent Roier.
Cellbit freezes on the stairs. Absently, his hands raise to his own ears, thankfully pinned down today with his alchemical goggles. He tends to have them out more days than not now, but. Well. Old habits die hard.
"I really don't know what you're talking about," Roier casually say. He isn't even looking at the woman, he's, instead, inspecting his nails- recently painted by Jaiden and absolutely adorable, just like he is. "But we do have a sale on luck potions if you wanna try one of those."
The woman's eyebrow twitches, and, for whatever reason, Cellbit doesn't think that she's here to buy something. Between the fine quality of her clothes and the literal knights with her and her entire aura, she just screams royalty, and that's a bad thing.
That's a really bad thing.
But Roier seems to have it under control, so, silently, Cellbit starts sneaking back up the stairs. If Roier needs him, he'll scream, and then Cellbit will rush down and kill everybody in the room and blame it on a sudden alchemical reaction gone wrong. Easy.
Except:
The door to the living quarters slams open and Pepito comes rushing out of it with tears streaming down his face.
"Apa!" he cries, leaping into Cellbit's arms and nearly sending him stumbling back down the stairs. "Richarlyson ate my crayons and now he's dying!"
(Richarlyson is not dying.)
Cellbit can practically smell the irritation coming off of Roier, even if he can't see him with his back turned to both him and the store and the really annoying royalty inside.
And, sure, Cellbit is annoyed, too, but he's also a father. So he just sighs and holds his son and lets him cry into his shoulder.
"Who's there?" one of the knights asks.
There's the sound of a sword being drawn, and then there's the sound of another sword being drawn and, really, is a peaceful retirement too much to ask for? Pac and Mike got one. Bad got one. Even Etoiles has some sort of retirement plan he's supposedly following between father-daughter dungeon-busting field trips.
The way Pepito is being held has him looking down the stairs and at the very rude people about to kill his parents, so Cellbit turns around so that Pepito is facing the door instead. He's always preferred looking danger in the face, anyway; it's much easier to be stabbed in the back than the front, after all.
Cellbit passively looks from one knight to another. He skips his eyes over the woman entirely. He catches Roier's eye, subtly rolls his own eyes, adjusts his hold on Pepito.
"Sorry," Cellbit says, "but my son is dying. I'll be right back."
"He's dead!" Pepito wails, ever-helpful. He's such a good kid.
The woman frowns. Cellbit doesn't think he likes her face. It's too... uncanny, like a doll come to life. Or, rather, like an image escaped from the mirror above the wash basin, and Cellbit does not like the implications of that, thanks.
As the knights start to advance, the woman holds up a hand to stop them.
"Hurry up," she says.
"Yeah," Roier agrees. "Tell Richas to die quicker, we have company."
Pepito screeches right into Cellbit's ear, making him wince very angrily in Roier's direction; all Roier does is wink and motion with his fingers for Cellbit to hurry up.
Cellbit quickly takes Pepito back into their living quarters and puts him down on the sofa.
Richarlyson is on the floor, very calm, very much not dying, and very much using Pepito's crayons in his own coloring book.
Pepito gasps, tears gone and replaced with wide, shocked eyes.
"But you ate them!" he exclaims.
Cellbit sighs, "Your brother is a magician, now can you two please behave for ten minutes while Roier and I deal with those people downstairs?"
Richarlyson's head perks up. "There are people downstairs?"
Cellbit nods. "Bad people, probably. If you hear glass breaking, you know what to do."
It's Richarlyson's turn to nod.
They have a plan. If things go down in the shop, Richarlyson and Pepito stay upstairs and hide until either Cellbit or Roier goes to get them. If the kids hear glass breaking, they are to escape out their bedroom window and climb down the tree outside and run to their Uncle Bad's house until Cellbit and Roier can get rid of the bad guys and save the day.
(Roier's words, not Cellbit's. Apparently, calling unruly customers or the police "the enemy" is bad. Go figure.)
Cellbit makes the kids both pinky promise him to follow the plan before letting out a long, stressed-out breath and starting back downstairs.
First, though, he dips into the kitchen and grabs his favorite butcher knife from off of the counter and tucks it into the custom-made sheath hidden beneath his jacket. Just in case.
Once downstairs, he's immediately manhandled by the knights until he's pushed up against the counter. Unfortunately, he isn't pushed behind the counter. But at least he can act as a shield... just in case.
On instinct, Cellbit reaches behind himself and takes Roier's hand. Roier takes it and squeezes gently, his thumb rubbing little circles into the skin by his thumb.
"Well," Cellbit says, looking from the knights to the woman, "you want something. What is it."
It isn't a question. It's more of a demand, really, and maybe he's stupid for demanding answers of royalty, but, like. Fuck the monarchy. What have they ever done for him?
The woman speaks: "We're looking for whichever one of you is Cellbit."
If they weren't already pinned down, Cellbit's ears would be flattening themselves to the top of his head. He bites back a hiss and instead just squeezes Roier's hand.
The woman continues with, "I'd like to bring him back with us to-"
"Yeah, okay," Roier casually says. "I'm Cellbit, hello."
Out of the corner of his eye, Cellbit can see Roier waving; he stifles a smile. He's so stupid...
Cellbit turns around and gasps dramatically. "Gatinho, no! You can't leave us!"
Roier bites his lip and looks away, turning his head to the side.
"But guapito," he says, dropping his voice an octave just for effect, "if I don't go, then... what about you and the children? They might-" (He moans and bows his head.) "-kill you. And then what would I do with myself?"
"Oh, don't worry!" the woman quickly says. "We won't hurt your family! That's why we're here, actually, to bring you and your family with us."
Cellbit ignores her. He reaches across the counter and cups Roier's cheek with his free hand, gently nudges his face until he raises his head and looks Cellbit in the eye; Roier's eyes are already wet with unshed tears, wow, he's good.
"But what will I do without you?" Cellbit demands, pitching his voice up just slightly. "Don't be stupid! I love you, pendejo!"
(They do this a lot, believe it or not. It drives Richarlyson crazy every time they do it because it somehow always ends up with them kissing until they're out of breath and shaky in the knees.)
"Não!" Roier cries. He squeezes his eyes shut and rips himself away from Cellbit entirely, staggering back and leaning against a display shelf full of anti-gravity potions. "Don't say that!"
"Say what?" Cellbit asks. "I love you!"
Roier screams and flinches against the case. "Não!"
Cellbit leans over the counter. "I love you."
Roier moans his time, his hands flying out wildly and grasping onto seemingly-random bottles on the shelf. "Não!!"
Cellbit extends a hand. "I. Love. You. Te amo, guapito."
One of the knights asks, "What the fuck is going on?"
And then the knights all start shouting as Roier opens his eyes and lunges to shove a potion into Cellbit's hands.
Cellbit grins and yanks the cork out of the bottle and chugs the potion and slams the empty bottle against the floor. It shatters, and he jumps.
"What the fuck?" the woman demands.
Cellbit twists mid-air and lands on the ceiling. He waves down at Roier, blows him a kiss, and takes off running for the back potion room. The door is closed, but the ventilation window above the door is open because he was supposed to be making potions right now. Silver linings.
He dives through the window, just barely managing to squirm through. He grunts, frowns, regrets getting this old, makes it through.
His goggles are nudged off of his head, though, leaving his ears on full display as he escapes into the potion room.
The woman gasps, "Get back here! Cellbit!"
But Roier just cheers, "Corre, gatinho!"
The potion room's door thuds and shakes in its hinges as the knights all slam against it. But, like, fuck those guys.
Cellbit runs down the length of the ceiling until he's reached the wall facing the alley behind the shop. He steps onto the wall, and then he runs down that until he's by the window. Again, ventilation, he should be working right now, but no, he can never know a moment of peace.
The potion starts running out just as Cellbit crawls through the window and lands on the shop's outside wall. He wrinkles his nose at the smell, but it's fine. Just trash, it's fine.
There's shouting from the front of the shop and the sounds of more bottles shattering. Roier sounds fine, though. He's even laughing, of course he is. He's badass, and Cellbit loves him, and Cellbit just wishes he was there to watch Roier swing his sword around like the sexy piece of shit he is.
The potion's effects wear off as Cellbit's feet touch the ground; two minutes, just as he'd made it to be.
He can see Richarlyson and Pepito running for it at the far end of the alley. Good, they actually followed directions for once.
Cellbit turns to run after them and get Bad's help, but he's stopped by a firm hand grabbing his shoulder from behind.
He snarls and pulls his knife out of his coat, spinning and slashing and just narrowly missing the woman's throat.
"Cellbit!" she shouts. "Calm down, it's just me!"
Cellbit responds by lunging at her with his teeth bared. He's been filing his teeth down for years, but he knows that he still cuts an intimidating figure when he's pissed enough.
The woman doesn't seem afraid, though. If anything, she just seems angry. And sad. Mostly angry.
She easily sidesteps his attack and yells, "It's me! What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
Oh, that's cute. Royalty asking why someone would want to hurt them, that's funny. They have the self-awareness of a walnut, all of them.
"Stop shouting 'it's me'!" Cellbit snaps. "Why should I care who you are?"
The woman's face starts turning red from frustration. "Because I'm your sister!"
Oh, that's rich.
"I don't have a sister," Cellbit sneers.
He swipes at her. Of course he does, he doesn't have a sister. He didn't have a family before he and the others found Richarlyson, and he only has one now that he has his kids and his husband.
"Then why do we have the same ears?" the woman demands.
She ducks under his knife and sweeps his legs out from under him. He falls and hisses and growls and does all sorts of things that princes might do because he isn't royalty. He knows that for certain. His first memory was him eating the corpse of a soldier on an empty battlefield, and it's with that image in mind that he snaps his teeth at the woman's throat.
"Only the royal family of the Gato Kingdom is born with feline features," the woman snaps. "Idiot!"
"Fuck the Gato Kingdom," Cellbit spits. "Your war destroyed everything I had!"
The woman's eyes turn sad. "It destroyed everything I had, too. It took my family from me. My friends. My home. We're just now starting to rebuild, and-"
She shrieks as Cellbit manages to flip their positions so that she's the one being pinned to the ground.
"So you show up and try kidnapping someone to fill in for your lost prince?" he snarls. "You people haven't changed."
The woman's mouth thins into an angry line. "I'm not trying to kidnap you! I just want to bring you home!"
"I don't have a home! This is my home!"
"You really don't remember, do you?" she asks, voice low. She isn't even struggling any more, not really. "It's me, your sister. Bagi."
The name stings Cellbit's brain in a way he doesn't like.
"I don't know you," he firmly says. "You don't know me. Leave my family alone."
He stands, hands shaking, head spinning. He doesn't like this.
Roier calls his name from the front of the building.
Cellbit, sure that this Bagi won't do anything while she's busy crying, turns and starts running towards the store.
He doesn't make it three steps before getting thwacked in the back of the head with something large and heavy and metal.
"Sorry," Bagi flatly says.
As he falls to the ground, his knife falls from his hand and ends up just out of reach.
He lands on his stomach and immediately tries standing again.
But he's stopped by a foot on his back pressing him down.
"I'll be sure to bring your family with us," Bagi tells him. "I'm not here to hurt you."
"Could have fooled me," Cellbit mutters.
Darkness takes him at last as Bagi smacks him again with her weapon, and all Cellbit can think is that he hopes that the kids ended up making it to Bad's after all.
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solarisfortuneia · 11 months
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— grace and coordination? who?
them with a clumsy reader. (ft. kaeya, thoma, tighnari, diluc, alhaitham, ayato, zhongli, childe.)
notes: pinkie swear this'll be the last repost for a while, bc i'm working on some new stuff mwah <3
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kaeya's reaction to your mishaps depends on the situation. sometimes he's literal prince charming, the very picture of concern and worry. and other times, when you're not in a lot of danger— like when you've tripped down a set of four stairs, for example— he'll try really really hard to keep a straight face to protect your feelings.
over time, he'll develop a sense of when and where accidents are most likely to happen and take measures to either remove the obstruction, or guide you away from it entirely. however, if the situation is inevitable, he'll try his best to catch you. one downside though— or upside, depending how you see it— is that he'll always hit you with an overused, cliché line.
"looks like you're falling for me all over again, sweetheart."
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this sweet, sweet boy is the most worried of all. initially, thoma thinks every scratch and every bruise is a consequence of something serious, but soon learns that they're most probably a result of your klutziness. even if you stumble lightly and regain your balance, he's instantly at your side, asking you if you're alright. he won't just take you at your word though, he'll check you himself from head to toe, and only then will he be satisfied.
he'll also carry bandages, antiseptic liquid, lotion, anything he thinks you might need. his pockets are endless. he'll even have small treats to console you after a bad fall.
"oh, dear! here, let me help you up. no injuries? good. here's a candy to cheer you up."
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frankly, he's exasperated. and also very concerned. whenever you bump your head on a branch or fall backwards on your butt, he just sighs and shakes his head before helping you. he knows you're no careless fool, just very prone to unlucky incidents, so he'll spare you the lecture.
tighnari is a firm believer in the fact that prevention is better than cure. so, he'll make sure your footwear is comfortable and supportive and make you change if any parts of your outfit have the potential to be a tripping hazard. if you wear glasses, he'll remind you to keep your prescription up to date. all in all, he'll minimize the possibility of you tripping due to things in your control.
"you'll trip on that robe of yours if you walk outside wearing it. go put on something else, i'd rather not see you fall into a hole in the ground again."
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diluc never expresses anything because he'd rather not come off as overbearing, but he's very careful with you. you can see it in the way he brings a hand to the edge of the table to stop you from hitting your head when you bend to pick up a spoon you knocked off the table, the way he keeps any sharp objects out of your reach, the way he's always scanning his surroundings.
he'll find himself doing all that even when you're not with him, and he'll be glad you weren't there to witness that. he'll baby proof his entire house just for you, and if he can, he'll baby proof yours too. he's the type to use the high quality silk handkerchief he carries around to bandage a scuffed knee.
"don't worry about it, cloth can be washed. the injury should be our first priority."
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there is no question alhaitham can't answer and no puzzle he can't solve, except, of course, the conundrum of how you manage to stumble over air, or slip on a completely dry surface. he'll observe you carefully, try his best to figure it out but eventually he'll chalk it up to circumstances being arranged against you.
he takes matters into his own hands and just fixes said circumstances for you. beyond that, he knows he cannot do much. he has the uncanny ability to know exactly when you're about to do something where you'll end up with a bump on your head, even if you're miles apart. he's also not too worried, he knows that a tumble isn't the end of the world. the problem only arises when you don't get back up again.
he'll firmly refuse to go dancing with you though, both for his sake and yours. he'll turn you down gently and suggest alternatives.
"dance with you? i'm not sure that's such a great idea. how about we spend the evening at the café?"
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kamisato ayato is grace, elegance and perfection. so it comes as a surprise to most of inazuma when they see that his partner is a walking disaster. he's fond of this trait of yours though; he thinks it's endearing. he's also very forgiving if you happen to step on his toes or bump into him. he has no issues replacing anything you break on accident too.
he knows he cannot personally keep an eye on you, so he'll have someone watch over you from afar to make sure nothing serious happens.  that's not to say he won't tease you, no. even though he knows the answer, he'll always ask playfully about any recent 'misfortune' you've been a part of every time he sees you.
"ah, there you are. have you fulfilled your daily quota of disaster for the day? now now, don't give me that look, you know i'm just teasing~"
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he's unfazed, really. he's seen many types of people and creatures over the years, from the most poised rulers to the most unsteady fawns. one thing he does do for you is carefully consider any gifts he's thinking of giving to you, and dismisses the item if it has pointy corners or is fragile.
zhongli's the type to fall with you so you're not alone. he was once a powerful archon, a little accident in a busy hall is nothing for him. and seeing him mimic you with a stoic face to help you feel better is always a treat to witness. then, he'll dust himself off as if nothing happened, and offer you a hand.
"think nothing of it, dearest. i simply wish to accompany you on any journey i can, even if it is a short one to the floor."
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childe's first and foremost reaction is to laugh when you hit your head on a pillar right in front of you, then he'll chuckle at the face you make at him when you're offended. he can't help it! it reminds him way too much of his siblings.
he sincerely promises, with a hand over his heart, to kiss any boo-boos better. and he'll insist on lifting you in his arms, and won't take no for an answer.
"no buts! i'm carrying you home like this. after all, the best way to stop you from tripping is to make sure your feet don't touch the ground, wouldn't you agree?"
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do you have advice on how to write genuine dialogue? i have a very severe case of when getting into the mindset of writing, and specifically writing dialogue, i only regurgitate whatever i have heard/seen from other media. it just seems unoriginal, ingenuine, and for aesthetic value only (i end up writing something out of a poem and not real people conversations). please help 😞
Writing Dialogue That Sounds Natural/Genuine
1 - Know Your Characters Well - One of the most important elements of writing natural/genuine-sounding dialogue is making sure you know your characters well. If you don't know who they are... their personalities, their experiences, what they care about, what they know and don't know... then you can't accurately envision what they'd have to say in a conversation. See: Making Personalities Unique and Keeping Them Straight
2 - Flesh Out Character Voice - "Character voice" is how your character's background, experiences, and personality affect what they say and how they speak. This isn't about quality of voice... it's about vocal personality. See: Giving Your Characters a Unique Voice
3 - Know What They're Going To Talk About - There's nothing that sounds more unnatural and inauthentic than characters having a conversation that has no relevance to anything. That said, it's super important to understand why you're writing this dialogue scene... what are you trying to accomplish with it? How does that move the story forward, move character development forward, or deliver important information to the reader? What needs to be said and why? Being clear on this can help you craft dialogue that sounds natural and genuine because it's relevant and serves a purpose.
4 - Balance Exposition, Action, and Dialogue - Overall, we want our stories to have a relative balance of exposition (explaining things), action (things happening), and dialogue. We want a relative balance of exposition, action, and dialogue in our scenes, too. What I mean by "relative" is you generally wouldn't want a scene that's all dialogue, very little action, and no exposition. (And I say "generally" because there can be exceptions... short scenes, scenes that serve a unique purpose, scenes with unique requirements, etc.) So, it's important to really think about the needs of your scene, what you're trying to accomplish, and make sure you've got a relative balance of dialogue, exposition, and action (as long as it works for the scene.) See: Exposition, Action, and Dialogue, and How to Pace Your Story
5 - Write Dialogue with Sensory and Emotional Depth - We never want our dialogue to be just words batted back and forth between two or more people. Dialogue needs to have depth, and we give it that depth in two ways.
-- Sensory Details in Dialogue -- Sight: what are the characters doing as they talk? What is their body language? Facial expressions? Hand gestures? How do they physically interact with their environment and others in the conversation? Sound: quality of voice (when characters voices get loud or soft, when a voice is gritty or raspy, when the speaker has an accent or speaks with a particular tone or cadence) as we as sounds like coughing, clearing the throat, or sighing... and sounds resulting from the character's interactions with the environment or others. Smell: bad breath or alcohol on the breath... or good breath... the smell of the speaker's perfume or body odor, the smell of a cigarette they're smoking, or a food they're eating.
Taste: there aren't many opportunities to include taste in dialogue, but possibilities would be tasting bile due to something awful someone said in the conversation, tasting food or drink sampled during conversation, or even "tasting" a smell associated with the environment during the conversation.
Feel: again, this will be more environmental... feeling a "chill" in the room when something cruel or scary is said. Noticing things felt due to the environment or interaction with the environment/others. Internal physical sensations felt during conversation.
*** And, it's important to note that I'm not suggesting that you include every sense or lots of sensory details. It's just adding a few that make sense can add depth and authenticity to the dialogue.
-- Emotional Details in Dialogue --
You also want to be sure to explore the emotional impact of the conversation as well as what characters are thinking as they participate in the conversation, and what they feel about what others are saying. As mentioned above in the "feel" portion of sensory details, you can explore the internal sensations caused by emotions felt as a result of the conversation. Stomach turning due to something unpleasant being said. Butterflies in stomach due to something exciting being said. Chill up the spine due to something scary being said. You can also explore emotions through visual emotional cues, which brings us back to things like body language, gestures, and facial expressions. Letting us know what characters are thinking and feeling (emotionally) during the conversation--or what they appear to be thinking and feeling if they don't say or we can't be inside their heads--adds depth and authenticity to the dialogue scene.
Happy writing!
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tonkatsubowl · 7 months
Text
flowers for you, my love.
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wriothesley x fem!reader
✦ modern au.
⚠️mentions of violence & strong language. dark themes. kidnapping. stalking.
you've always admired wriothesley in the distance, and now... he's protecting you from the dangers of the world.
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you own a small business.
well, it wasn't yours to begin with. it was your grandmother's.
your grandmother owned a local flower shop right next to a café, and you were well known within this small town for providing the best, high quality plants. you often sold out during holidays, especially valentine's day... but with the fall season coming up, you were quite busy preparing for halloween.
you were getting ready to sell pumpkins and just preparing the festive season for your customers... especially your regulars, too.
you fancied a regular named wriothesley, whom you call "rio" for short. how you both met was quite a wonder, really.
from down the street of your flower shop, there is a local gym. in order to get home, you take a short cut past the gym to reach to your apartments. during your closing period, you'd leave, and you'd always spot the same man who can be seen using the punching bag as a practice for his boxing skills. you would stop, stare from the large windows, before leaving quickly to remain unnoticed. shortly enough, you had a small crush on him despite not really speaking to him at all... until one day, he came to your flower shop looking for some flowers to decorate his home for the season. he was never really the type to decorate his home with flowers, but with the amount of stray cats that he was attracting... he really wanted to have them visit more and use the flowers outside his home as an attraction and toy for them.
ever since you both had met, wriothesley frequents your shop. he either comes to say hello, to buy flowers, but sometimes he doesn't show up at all. but you see him at the gym all the time, boxing and lifting weights. you admired how much he would sweat, how strong he was, how beautiful he looked...
...that was when you sighed dreamily to yourself, then you'd snap back to reality. right, what were you thinking right now? you were in the middle of closing up the shop. you were in your head again, thinking too much about wriothesley. you wish you had his number so you can speak to him more, but granted, you were a little shy.
flipping your sign to "closed", you adjust your bag before walking down the street again, taking your typical route home. you past the restaurant, the café, and finally... the gym.
your eyes wander towards the window, spotting the familiar man you admired in the distance, deadlifting what appeared to be about six-hundred pounds. he was absolutely strong, and god, you admired him for it...
...but he does sweat a lot, doesn't he?
around this time at the gym, there wasn't really anyone around but him. you look around, digging your hands into your bag before approaching the window, knocking onto it as an attempt to catch his attention... which was a success.
wriothesley looks over, blinking before smiling, waving at you. picking up his phone from the floor, he wanders towards you, motioning you to come inside through the window. you nod, making your way inside.
"hey, y/n." wriothesley said, smiling faintly at you. "closed up your shop for tonight?"
you nodded, returning the faint smile. "yeah. i come by through here every night since it's the route i take home."
wriothesley blinked. "...huh. by yourself? isn't that a little dangerous?" he tilted his head, furrowing his brows a bit at you.
"not really!" you shake your head. he wasn't wrong... it was entirely dangerous to walk around as a woman alone, especially last sunset. but you were accustomed to the town's safety, "i've been living here for almost my entire life, so i'll be okay."
wriothesley pursed his lips, his shoulders slumping. "i don't believe that."
that was when you can read the soft worried expression painting across his features. you felt a little bad, but you didn't want him to worry about you... especially when the both of you didn't exactly know each other too well. so, to soothe him, you lift the handkerchief that you had hidden in your bag, before gently wiping the sweat away from his forehead... and his jawline.
he blinked, his worried expression seizing entirely, though he was still worried about you. "you don't gotta..." he began, but he fell silent immediately. "...thanks." he enjoyed it.
being this close... you could see every feature of his body. his protruding veins at his biceps, the well sculpt figure he bestowed. the faint scars found across his body and arms... and you were probably caught staring at wriothesley a bit too long... so you look away, shoving the fabric back into your bag.
"s-sorry."
wriothesley chuckled, shaking his head. "don't be. i appreciate the effort." he said, before placing a hand into his pocket.
"..say. if you're on your way back, i want you to text me to make sure i know you got home safe."
you blinked, looking back towards wriothesley, watching as he pulled out his phone from his pocket. "ah? w-wait, you don't need—" oh, this was a good opportunity to get his number though...but maybe it was just he cared about your safety.
you internally sigh with your anxious thoughts, taking his phone before inputting your contact information and sending yourself a text. wriothesley smiled, "appreciate it. now, it's getting dark. and i got a few sets to finish up, then i have something to do later. text me when you're home, alright?"
you nodded slowly, watching as he turned his back towards you, returning to his workout. that was when you left, exiting the building of the gym...— "wait."
you stop, retracting your hand from pulling the doors of the exit, wriothesley's voice catching your attention.
"i'll walk you home instead, if that's alright with you."
you turn your head towards the man, seeing that he was putting o his shirt and he was picking up his gym bag and his shaker bottle. "i gotta get going soon, anyway. i didn't realize the time."
"a-ah, rio... you don't need to walk me home. really, i don't need you to be late to... wherever you need to be." you protest.
"nah," he shook his head, "it's fine. i'd rather you be safe first than me going somewhere without guaranteeing your safety."
you feel warmth creeping at your cheeks as you nod slowly, letting wriothesley move past you as he opened the door for you, "is that alright with you?"
you nodded, "ye-.. yes. i'm okay with that."
the two of you eventually left the gym together. the night was peaceful, the crickets were chirping, and the night sky was a splendid view to behold for all to see. each star greeted you both with its twinkle, almost distracting you from the current conversation you had with wriothesley.
"so," he began, "the flower shop. you own that?"
you nodded, "now i do. it was initially my grandmother's, actually. but when she passed, she gave it to me as a parting gift. now i run it."
"i see. sorry to hear about your grandmother." wriothesley said, glancing towards you. "i mean, do you enjoy having it? the shop, i mean."
"it's nice, i mean. i enjoy it, but i don't know if it's actually for me." you gave a sheepish smile. "the customers can be a little frustrating to deal with, but i'm there for the flowers."
wriothesley nod, he smiles at your direction. "i see. i always try to tell people that they should do what they enjoy. but follow your heart, you know?"
you nodded, stopping at the steps of your apartment. "well, here it is. home sweet home," you turn your head to wriothesley, "thank you for walking me home, rio. i appreciate it. i told you it wasn't a long walk."
wriothesley shook his head, shrugging his shoulders a bit. "hey, short walk or not, i just wanted to make sure you were safe. but uh, i'll see you later, alright? thank you for earlier, y/n. i gotta go now." with a small smile, the man lifts a hand to wave you goodbye before leaving.
watching as he left, you sigh, entering your apartment. you were safe and sound, finally home and welcoming the arms of your dog that was always so happy to see you.
... but you were completely oblivious to someone who was happy to see you too, stalking you from the shadows of the neighborhood.
and it wasn't your beloved wriothesley.
after taking a shower, you were getting ready to go to bed for the night. however, you couldn't stop thinking about wriothesley... so you decided to shoot him a text.
you wouldn't be surprised if he didn't respond back—he was probably asleep, or busy with whatever.
➽ y/n: hello! i just wanted to thank you for walking me home. i appreciate it.
➽ rio: no problem. go get some rest. glad you're safe and sound.
oh, he texted back rather fast. you wanted to text him more, but exhaustion was finally hitting you...
➽ y/n: you too! goodnight!
the next day, you woke up early to take your dog out, to prepare breakfast, and to practically get ready for the day. a part of you was expecting some sort of good morning text from wriothesley, but... you didn't get anything. maybe he gave you his contact information solely to make sure you were safe.
you were overthinking it, now. maybe he didn't find any interest in you. maybe you made him feel uncomfortable? no, no—stop overthinking it. you'll be fine. just... think about work, now. work. it's time to work.
...you had a big sale that was happening at your flower shop today, so you knew your shift would be extremely busy. so you had to slap the anxiety out of you. literally.
entering your shop, you began the day by watering your flowers and plants before proceeding to creating small bouquets. you always had fun making these bouquets, decorating each one with color schemes and other themes, and it was your favorite part of the day. it was even better whenever wriothesley came by to visit.
as though the devil himself was listening to your wishes, your phone buzzes, catching your attention while you were in the middle of work.
➽ rio: morning. just woke up. you alright?
ah, your heart was racing. you tried to contain your excitement as he texted you! so he wakes up later in the day? you weren't surprised...
➽ y/n: good morning. i'm okay. did you sleep well?
➽ rio: i'm glad you're okay. i slept well. are you at work?
➽ y/n: yeah it's a little busy atm
➽ rio: i see. i'll come by whenever i get the chance.
➽ y/n: okay! ( ; ω ; )
containing your excitement, you began to work as fast as possible and efficiently as possible to get ready for the rush. you wanted to see wriothesley, so you were basically playing the waiting game all day—despite working through the rush. luckily for you, the little special you had going on ended in the afternoon, so today you'd close your shop early.
eventually, because of the rush, you even forgot about wriothesley for a moment. you were helping many, many customers and getting ready to send out orders, and from the distance... your secret admirer was watching you, adoring the visual of flowers being taken care of by your hands, the smiles on customers' faces when they leave your shop with an abundance of flowers in their hands...
dang, you really did forget about wriothesley for a moment, but when he had shown up to your shop, it was definitely a huge reminder to yourself that he said he'd come by! when he had entered, he caught the eyes of the elderly women in your shop as he approached you. although you didn't notice him yet, you were occupied setting a flower into a small child's ear before sending them off to their parent, smiling as they jumped and skipped away with joy.
the scene itself sent flutters to his heart, chuckling as he watched the child skip away joyously. you nearly jump yourself when you hear wriothesley's voice behind you, "ah—" you turned, facing the men you caught feelings for.
"hey, sorry, y/n," wriothesley said with a sheepish smile, "i didn't mean to scare you. you seem busy though, i can come back later, and—"
"n-no!" you shake your head, "no, you can... stay." you felt a little awkward and shy, especially when you had risen your voice just a teeny tiny bit to disagree. "i-i mean. if you have somewhere to be, i won't stop you."
"i don't, which is why i came here... and to ask and see if you'd like to... uh," he sheepishly rubbed the back of his head, "...want me to treat you for lunch?"
you froze, staring at wriothesley for a brief moment... before you felt red creep towards your cheeks, smiling faintly. timidly, you tuck your hair behind your ear as you looked to the side, trying to hide your embarrassment to fixate on the flowers. "i... i would love to, rio. um, today? tomorrow...? when? what time?"
wriothesley's eyes soften, you could see his broad shoulders easing up, as though tense from the question he had asked you. "...today, after work. if that's okay with you. i saw your sign out there that you'd be closing the shop early or something, so i figured, maybe..."
"i don't mind at all," you shake your head, "i'd love to."
"alright, perfect. um, it's a date then." wriothesley nodded, flashing a faint smile at you.
ah... a date? you felt your heart flutter, you wanted to just faint right here and now. "alright! i'll see you later then."
wriothesley nodded, "good luck at work. i'll swing by to pick you up."
after wriothesley's visit, work went by surprisingly fast. you were expecting the day to be a little slower after the rush, especially when you kept looking at the clock. eventually when the last customer had left, you finally took the time to close up your shop, and eventually, you were waiting for wriothesley... who arrived rather quickly.
he was standing outside your shop, swiping through his phone. he hadn't notice you yet, but this gave you time to practically admire the man in all his glory. you could see his chiseled muscles, his jawline, how slick his hair was moved back... you can tell wriothesley took some time to get ready to look nice for you, although it wasn't much, you could see every detail of it. however, you were still wearing your cute little apron. and you smelled like flowers.
...you were sure he wouldn't mind you showing up to your date in this outfit, just being... yourself. he found out cute, truthfully. he didn't care about seeing you in a fancy dress or something wealthy to look nice. as long as you were there, being yourself, that's all that mattered to him.
"rio!" you called out to him as you approached him, holding something behind your back. yes, you had a gift for him. it was the norm for the man to give the woman a flower, but you really broke the norm and had a carnation for him. a white one, and it had reminded you of him.
wriothesley looked towards you, putting away his phone as he greeted you with a smile. "y/n." he says, his left hand also hiding behind his back. but you didn't seem to notice it, until the both of you extended your hidden hands towards each other, gifting each other a flower.
he gave you a rose, which was typical, and you... well, the carnation.
"i have this for you—"
"this is for you, rio—"
the both of you said in unison, before awkwardness silenced the both of you. then, the two of you would laugh together, exchanging the gifts you have for each other to their respective owners.
"great minds think alike, huh?" rio said with a slight grin. "i don't really know much about flowers, but... that's a nice looking flower you have there for me. what is it, a carnation?"
you blink, your eyes brightening as you gave wriothesley a smile. "yeah! a carnation, actually. it.. um," you glanced away, timid, "reminded me of you. so i..."
"huh," he chuckled, "i see! i'm glad. this rose reminded me of you, too. not thorny, but... beautiful to the eye."
that was when you felt like your whole world had been reincarnated to a land of fantasy. your heart had fluttered, your cheeks turned red, and this was practically confirmation—besides the fact you both were going on a date now.
"a-ah... stop it," you murmur, embarrassed, "i could say the same thing to you, you know. i mean... i... i took these carnations because i thought of you, too."
wriothesley smiled, giving you a soft chuckle. he seemed shy from that statement. taking offering to take your hand, he puts the carnation in the pocket of his shirt and the rose behind your ear (after trimming it). he then leads you to the café just down the street, where you were greeted with the sight of fresh delicacies and the delightful scent of coffee beans and bread.
it wasn't that long of a walk, and during the whole walk there, the two of you were holding hands, admiring the view of the town in silence. it wasn't awkward silence, either. it was comforting silence. stray kittens asleep near porches, children laughing as they chased each other down the road, elderly couples walking together... it was peaceful. and you enjoyed every bit of the town.
"welcome in!" you can hear the baristas greet you with joy, accompanied by the sound of glass clinking together. you and wriothesley take a seat at an empty table, looking down at a menu that listed many delicacies and various types of drinks.
you eyed at a white mocha latte, and given the weather, an iced one. "think i'll take a black coffee." you hear wriothesley say as he looks up at you, his hands digging into his pocket for his wallet, "you?"
"a white mocha latte... iced." you say, doing the same thing.
"ah, ah," he motioned towards you with a tune playing through his lips, denying your actions as he observed you, "date etiquette, miss y/n," a smile tugs at his lips, "the gentleman pays for the food."
"ah— no, let me! etiquette or not." you frown, furrowing your brows a bit.
but he was quick to get up with his wallet, approaching the baristas before ordering for you. with a defeated sigh, you watched him as he left your side momentarily, giving you a bit of time to admire the windowed view next to you.
the sky was beautiful, it was nice out. life was peaceful here in this small town, but... from the corner of your eye, you spot a hooded figure sitting on a bench, waiting for a bus to come. you can't help but seem to feel that the figure was looking at you for a bit, but you played it off, shaking your head. some people like to look just to look.
...but it was unnerving, now.
now the hooded figure was staring at you, and you could see the distraught eyes the man had. he seemed... so unkept. just when you were thinking you weren't being looked at, you were beginning to feel uncomfortable. eventually, your discomfort turned into safety when wriothesley returned to your side with the drinks.
"i'm back. sorry for the wait." wriothesley said, before immediately spotting the hint of discomfort on your face and your gaze that was directed out towards the window. he glanced back, not really seeing anything—considering the man in the hoodie was gone now.
"what is it? did you see something?" he asked, looking back at you.
you shake your head. "no, nothing. i just saw some weird man is all."
wriothesley canted his head, "people will always be weird in some aspects here. especially in the corner of the streets here... but, erm, here's your latte."
handing you your drink, he takes a sip of his black coffee as he sat back down, looking towards you with a very faint smile. you do the same, a smile tugging at your lips as you enjoyed the taste of the freshly brewed espresso and milk combined.
"this is really good," you murmur, taking another sip.
"i'm glad to hear that. the black coffee they got here is good, too. this is actually my first time being here, and i've been meaning to come here for a while."
"ah, really?" you blinked, tilting your head to the side. "me too, actually. even though it's down the street from where the flower shop, i'm surprised that i haven't gotten the chance to actually visit it."
wriothesley chuckled. "well, here we are."
"yeah! i'm glad you enjoy it so far." you beam.
"the date? i am." wriothesley takes another sip. "are you?"
"yeah! i really am enjoying myself so for. but, um..." your fingers tap against the glass. "your... um... right. we should get to know each other..."
setting down his mug, he folds his arms over his chest, leaning back against the seat. "how about twenty one questions?"
"ah, twenty one questions?" you blink. "just ask each other questions?"
he nodded, "yep. i can start off, if you'd like."
"yeah, i wouldn't mind that." you nod slowly, taking one last sip of the white mocha.
"so," wriothesley began, "do you always see me working out?"
oh, he really did catch you there. red handed, even. you furiously turn red, covering your face with both hands. "i—" you stammered. "i-i mean... you always... i... i take the same route home! so i happen to watch you sometimes..."
there was a sly grin on wriothesley's face as he chuckled. "ah, you know, i guess i can admit to the same thing. before you and i actually met and exchanged names, i'd always admire you working and watering the flowers while i'm on my way to the gym. it was love at first sight, so... i was a little shy, yeah, i know, to approach you."
ah, you felt your body relax a bit. yeah, you definitely felt the same, but you had no idea that wriothesley was actually admiring you from the distance! you had a smile on your face as you basically had confirmation the two of you were on the same boat. "ah... well, me too, though. i'm just glad i, um, thought my reasonings of seeing you would be discomforting to you or... well, weird."
wriothesley shook his head, "naw. i think you're totally fine." oh, he certainly meant that you were absolutely fine, too.
"so," he spoke, his eyes brightening, his eyes glancing to the time on his phone for a moment, "there's a perfect view of the lake right down at the park down the street. especially around this time. you can see the line of the milky-way, despite the light pollution and all... would you like to come and check it out with me? after i get done with the gym, i always visit the lake."
you immediately stand, taking your bag with a bright look, "yes! i'd love to see that with you. i have never really seen that side of the lake before, given i only really... well, go to work and go straight home, but... i'd love to."
wriothesley grinned, taking your hand gently. "alright. let's go, then."
as the two of you left, your eyes linger towards the left side of the street... wondering if that hooded man was there at all. but he wasn't, to your relief. now, you would be able to focus on the date and wriothesley until the date ends!
...what you didn't realize he was on the other end of the street, still watching you.
"ah, home sweet home," wriothesley said as he brought you to the foot of your door, smiling. "i really had fun today, y/n. i hope you did, too." wriothesley was already occupied on one knee, greeting your dog that joyously came running over to say welcome home to you. now, it was excited to see your date, wagging its tail and all slobbery.
you stood inside after opening the door, giggling as you watched your dog greet the both of you with excitement. "ah, i really did! did you... um... want to schedule another date? i-its okay if you don't want to, i-i mean i understa—"
"hey."
you stop, your eyes peeled towards the taller man as he placed a hand on your shoulder, giving you a reassuring squeeze. "of course. don't get all self-deprecating, now. i'd love to go on another date with you. how about..." he paused. "...tomorrow? or just... whenever you're free."
you felt warmth creep towards your cheeks as you felt his hand on your shoulder. you nod slowly, admiring the closer details of his forearm, seeing the faint scars and protruding veins of his chiseled muscles... god, you could just melt right here and now.
"i would love to! tomorrow is actually my day off, so...! you had that time perfectly, actually." you smile.
wriothesley chuckled, "alright, cool. i'll see you tomorrow then."
"a-ah, wait... text me when you get home, please, rio!"
wriothesley chuckles, "i will, y/n."
although he was more than capable of handling himself, you worried about his safety too.
if anything, you should be worried about yours right now, since wriothesley isn't at your apartment anymore.
when night fell, you had already showered and began to cook dinner for yourself. you had already received a text from your date that he was home, immediately easing you of your anxieties and thoughts. your dog was cozied up on your couch as you were quietly listening to music. you eventually finished making dinner, then you would eat... then you would get ready for bed after spending some time on your phone and whatnot.
you eventually lay back down on the softness of your mattress and cushions, closing your eyes... but the moment you had tried to fall asleep, you felt... tense. anxious. something was wrong. and you had felt like you were being watched.
your dog was asleep, seemingly unalert by your surroundings... but for your comfort, you call out to your dog, who came trotting by your side. it would rest on the ground, its ears suddenly perked as it stared out your window. you freeze, watching the body language of your dog. reading it, observing it...
your instincts weren't wrong. especially when you heard footsteps going around your building a bit, especially at this time of night.
you then text wriothesley, your fingers shaking a bit.
➽ y/n: was that you?
you didn't get a response immediately, but you remained on the bed... still frozen. that was when you mustered up the courage to get up slowly, peeking through the blindfolds of your window. you were silent, and all rooms were dark. you knew your apartment was locked and tightly secured, and your dog would alert you of any intruder. but you were still terrified.
something was wrong.
and it didn't help that you saw a figure, a man wearing a hoodie, hood up and everything, surveying your building. the same one that you saw on the date with wriothesley today... did he follow you home?
you text wriothesley again. he might be asleep. maybe it's better to call him.
➽ y/n: rio??
➽ y/n: is that you outside?
➽ y/n: if it's you, you're scaring me
then you tried to call him, but to no avail. everything was going straight to voicemail. he was most likely asleep at this time, or is incredibly busy... but you breathed, trying to calm yourself.
calm, girl. calm.
maybe this guy was just... y'know. a weird neighbor. don't overthink it, but you also didn't want to actually be wrong.
taking you and your dog to your kitchen, you retrieve your kitchen knife before returning back to bed, locking your bedroom door and hiding the knife within the cabinet of your nightstand. you were unable to sleep that night, considering you stayed up all night, trying to get your thoughts together, trying to ease yourself of your anxiety.
but when you had gotten a text, you scramble to your phone, assuming it was wriothesley but...
this message is from an unsaved contact number. please block to avoid unwanted messages.
➽ unknown: you're cute. ever since you sold flowers to me that day, i fell in love with you.
➽ unknown: do you have a boyfriend? was that man with you your boyfriend earlier? i could do better than him.
➽ unknown: disregard that last message. you're mine.
you were frozen, time and space around you didn't budge, either. did you obtain... a stalker of some sort? you stared at your phone screen, unsure what was actually going on.
but you immediately alerted the police by dialing the emergency button, and it wasn't long until the cops had arrived. you escape the comfort of your home, speaking to the officers who arrived at the scene. they investigate and they looked around, to no avail. they approached you after, telling you that if you noticed any more suspicious activity, they'd be here immediately. but of course, the policemen didn't do anything until your stalker was actually there, leaving you to go back home.
the next morning, you barely had any hours of sleep, keeping your eyes wide awake and dozing off a few times due to your immense anxiety. even before the bird was awake enough to catch its worm, you decided to take you and your dog to the café to avoid your home for a while. you ordered your white mocha, sitting in silence. you cautiously looked around to see if you noticed anyone out of place, but... you didn't. at least not yet.
wriothesley hadn't answered his phone either, so you were hoping nothing had truly happened to him and he was just dead asleep or something. you sigh, not even wanting to send another text to wriothesley. if he wasn't answering, then... he wasn't answering. that was it.
after drinking your white mocha, you decided to go back home with your dog. you just decided to cancel the date for the sake of your mentality and your health.
you walked down the street with your dog, and you finally reached home. letting your dog enter first, you let go of the leash, reaching into your phone as your dog wandered off to the other room...
...but before you could send a text to wriothesley that you wanted to cancel it, you felt a hand over your mouth. your dog immediately realized what had happened, and ran towards you while barking aggressively. but your kidnapper was faster, slamming the door shut and dragging you away after drugging you through the infamous scent of chloroform on a piece of fabric. your body was limp, and your phone fell out of your hands. through the blur of your vision as you faded away, you see a text from wriothesley...
➽ rio: ??? y/n?
➽ rio: hey why aren't you answering?
➽ rio: i just woke up, my ringer was off. fuck
➽ rio: hey, where are you???? answer me now
➽ rio: i'm coming to your place right now
but, you were unable to respond, as you felt your consciousness slip away from you, succeeding in a kidnapping.
it wasn't long when wriothesley had arrived at your apartment. the first thing he saw was your phone that was dropped right in front of the door, and the aggressive barking that was taking place behind the door. he picks up your phone, and to his surprise, he finds another set of numbers that was texting you... he reads the stalker's messages, feeling rage and worry rush through his veins. were you kidnapped? were you hurt? he could see you had contacted the police too from your contact history...
god, now he was even more worried.
wriothesley opened the door of your apartment, even feeling worse when he realized your home was unlocked. greeted by your dog, he wanders in, trying to find anything... any trace of you. "y/n?" he calls out to your name before cursing underneath his breath. looking to your dog, he places your phone at its muzzle, encouraging it to try to find you through your scent.
your dog, to his surprise, begins to paw at the door. it seemed like it wanted to leave, and it had wanted him to follow. picking up the leash that slipped out of your hand earlier, he latches it to the collar of your dog before following your dog out—not until he had to lock your apartment, just in case.
your dog basically dragged and lead wriothesley to the quiet areas of the town, and it wasn't long until he had stopped in front of an old, worn out apartment complex. it was a few minutes away from where you had lived, and... given that your dog lead wriothesley to this place, he could assume you had been most likely kidnapped.
your dog even lead him to a door on the second floor building, sniffing at the door, wagging its tail. wriothesley felt himself getting more angry by the second. he faulted himself—and if he had his ringer on, he would have been awake and you'd be in much more safer hands than you are now.
"hey, open up!" wriothesley banged on the door with his fists, expecting some sort of response... but to no avail. "i said open up! i know you're in there, asshole!"
he banged his fists on the door again, but again, no response. but he wouldn't doubt the senses of your dog.
gritting his teeth, he hurled his leg back before ramming his foot onto the side of the knob. one fell swoop, and he had already knocked the door down. there, he saw you, unconscious on the floor with a fabric over your mouth. and the kidnapper was nowhere to be seen, but you were at least there.
from where wriothesley was standing, he could see you were still breathing... which was the biggest relief to him. but the bigger question for him was where was the man who laid his hands on you?
immediately rushing to your side, he was ready to scoop you into his arms... but that was when he was initiated onto a fight by your kidnapper. "you fucking—*
wriothesley avoided a hook to the head from behind, given he has experienced and history of being a fighter, this wasn't the first time he was in hand to hand combat.
the kidnapper, however, was not well experienced enough in fighting... thus became nothing but a pure punching bag for wriothesley. he was given blows to the face, over and over, blood and punishment filled the room as he practically learned his lesson of "fuck around and find out", but with the wrong woman and her significant other.
soon eventually, wriothesley had won the fight, where he immediately called law enforcement and pulled you into his arms. you were safely escorted to the hospital, and the police had taken your phone as evidence due to the text messages, and had arrested your kidnapper.
luckily enough, you were resting peacefully, making a full recovery. you weren't hurt, and luckily nothing bad had truly happened to you... otherwise wriothesley would have murder on his record.
you were in the hospital bed, deep asleep, and next to you was wriothesley who never left your side. he had answered questions to law enforcement, provided information to the nurses like your birthday and what had happened... but luckily, you had woken up later on that day. from there, you had provided information to wriothesley, letting him know what happened and such... but terribly so, he felt incredibly bad.
you shake your head, placing a hand on his arm, "no, no. don't blame yourself. really. please don't, rio."
wriothesley gritted his teeth, but he had calmed down when you had touched his arm. he sighed, taking your hand into his own. "...fuck. this is just... ugh."
you fell silent.
"...i'm just glad you aren't too hurt. i would've actually done something horrible if you were." wriothesley said, looking towards you with seriousness in his eyes.
"...but i'm okay, alive and awake. you saved me regardless. and i want to thank you for it."
wriothesley sighed again. "...yeah. as long as you're fine and well. that's all that truly matters to me."
it wasn't long until you were finally admitted from hospital, and of course... wriothesley took you home. he made sure you were tightly secured in your home, too. but the moment he was ready to leave... he paused.
"... actually." he turns to you. "if you let me. i want to stay the night over here... i need to make sure you're fully safe."
you pause.
you knew if you tried to protest, he would try to fight it. but you smiled. you felt incredibly safe with wriothesley anyway, so... why not? you trust him, after all.
"of course. i have extra tooth brushes and everything but um... my couch isn't big enough... so you'd have to sleep on the same bed as me."
wriothesley shook his head. "that's fine with me."
as you got comfortable in your bed, wriothesley immediately joined you, but the both of you had respectful spaces. of course, wriothesley had no ill or disgusting intentions to bed you here and then, considering he was moreso concerned about your safety than anything else. but... the both of you couldn't sleep, and even with your backs turned to each other, the both of you assumed that you both were... well, asleep.
but, he was thinking about you.
as you were with him.
"...rio?" you finally spoke up. "are you awake?"
"...yeah."
he hears you shuffle as you turned over, tapping him on the shoulder. he turns to you, letting you admire him this close. he was... beautiful.
"...thank you." you say again, boldly leaning in towards his body, burying your face into his chest.
he was taken by surprise for a moment, but... he returned the affection, wrapping his arms around you as he placed his chin on top of your head. "just want you to be safe." he murmured.
you look up slowly, your eyes meeting. silence fell, and you had intuitively leaned in... brushing your lips against wriothesley's. he immediately returned your affection, grazing your lips with his own, brushing your hair back gently behind your ear.
"...safe and sound in my arms, y/n."
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weird-an · 1 month
Text
Billy sips his coffee and wishes it was beer. But Steve gave him one stern look when he reached for the bottle, so he took milk instead.
"You," Henderson says, squinting his eyes like they're in a stupid Western and about to draw their guns.
It's not a duel, Steve had explained. He just wanted them to meet, to get to know each other, apparently forgetting that Billy Hargrove doesn't hang out with nerds.
"'Sup," Billy grumbles. He can hear Steve rummaging upstairs, probably taking longer to join them than necessary. Harrington's a bad liar with a heart of gold.
That's why Billy…. Well, he should probably try to not get into a fight. Steve is the only good thing in his life. The definition of good - another reason why Billy doesn’t fucking deserve him.
"He likes you," Henderson tells him, a puzzled look on his face. "Why?"
The coffee turns cold on Billy's tongue. Fuck him, why should he know?
"Got my qualities." He puts on a leering grin and winks at Henderson.
Dustin's nose turns a little green and he makes a belching sound.
Billy cackles.
"Billy." Steve clicks his tongue. Shit. Billy didn't notice him coming back.
Billy raises his hands. "I didn't do shit," he promises.
"Babe," Steve says, rolling his eyes and Billy's face grows hot.
"Babe," Dustin repeats, a twinkle in his eyes. Distraught and joy melt together, making him grin widely.
"It's a joke," Billy lies. Shit shit shit. He's going to tell Max and Billy will never hear the end of it. "Steve's joking."
"Uh, sure," Steve agrees, cheeks as red as cherries.
"Steve, you really need to get better at lying," Dustin laughs. "Maybe Babe here-"
"Henderson," Billy growls. Dustin will regret that.
"Jesus," Steve sighs, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
"This isn't what I expected," Dustin snorts, still giggling.
"Same," Billy says flatly.
"If you don't kiss in front of me, I won't tell Max," the kid offers.
Billy won't get blackmailed by a baby nerd.
He gives Steve a big wet kiss on the mouth.
Dustin makes a strangled noise.
Maybe it's a duel after all.
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lukesandromeda · 15 days
Text
dreamscape - l. castellan
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
content: angst, i think swearing, pjo show references
pairing: luke castellan x daughter of hypnos!reader
the familiar feeling of sleep finally comes over you, and you're brought into that peaceful bliss you and your siblings know all too well
for children of hypnos, sleeping isn't sleeping. it's your transfer to a more peaceful part of your day. when a child of hypnos goes to sleep, they are brought into a dreamscape that reflects their mood. they live there for those many hours until they wake up.
you open your eyes to the realm you know as your own. it's a beach. before everything had happened, it was a peaceful shore with placid waves, but now, it is a storm crackling in the sky and high tides attacking the water.
you take a shaky breath, stepping onto the sand, the way you do every night. picking your eyes up from where your feet touch the sand, you stop in your tracks when you spot a figure in the distance, standing a few yards away from where the waves pound onto the rocks. a figure you know better than the back of your hand.
a man. a man clothed in business attire—his hair neatly combed. these were the two qualities that made him slightly different from how you remember him.
you remembered him as the angry yet still gentle boy in that same orange camp shirt. eventually, you remembered him as the boy who betrayed you. your friends. the entire camp. the man who joined kronos-the man who sabotaged the gods and left you with nothing but the remnants of his love-memories. good and bad.
he left last year quickly after an attack on percy jackson, a young boy you'd helped luke show around camp when he'd first arrived.
you remember the way you'd laughed when percy first told you what had happened; you didn't believe it. thought it was some sick joke. but here you were, over three hundred and sixty-five days after he left you, seeing him in your dreamscape.
this shouldn't be possible. he's obviously dreaming. you can comprehend that from the way his body is slightly transparent. but how is he dreaming of this place? the only way he could dream of it—
is if he's thinking of you.
you curse yourself. you curse hypnos for letting luke castellan in this dreamscape. you know your father has to approve of entrance of an entity that is not of descent of hypnos. you know he allowed him to enter. you don't know why, but it's the only way possible.
you take a shaky deep breath before picking your feet up, carrying yourself along the sand and closer to luke. he's standing there with his hands in his pockets, looking out at the waters. the crashing, angry, messy waters that reflect your state of mind-angry, messy... at least, ever since he left.
you finally stop next to him, putting enough distance in between the two of you. you stare out at those waters. crazy. like you-for walking up to luke castellan and standing next to him with such serenity.
with force, you open your mouth and push out the simple name, "luke."
turning your head to him, you realize luke is squeezing his eyes. he doesn't seem surprised that you're here. he shakes his head. "y/n."
you click your tongue, shaking the monotonous reaction off of your mind. "what are you doing here?"
he shrugs, staring out at the pounding waves. the wind stirs his dark curls, the chill of it carrying the salty water landing against his face, turning it pink. he moistens his lips. "waiting."
"for?"
your eyes bore into his that are still turned toward the ocean. his lip twists into a small, sad smile, and he just shrugs again. "you."
"oh." you nervously take your camp necklace up into your hands, twirling the string and sliding the beads in between your fingers.
he inhales sharply, finally turning to you. his breath hitches as he takes in the sight of you, and then he reaches out toward you.
instinctively, you back away, afraid to let him in, afraid to trust. he purses his lips after freezing, and then he lowers his hand. "right."
you sigh, dropping your necklace back to hang loosely where it belongs. "m sorry, i just... i... i can't.
"i know."
luke turns his head slowly back to the shore, eyes trailing along the skyline as a bird flies by. rain trickles down his proud cheekbones. he parts his lips, licking them and letting the rain in. he closes his mouth, tasting the salt on his tongue and then opens it again. "tastes familiar."
in a dreamscape, the rain is your tears-the same tears luke used to kiss away and playfully lick at when you cried in his arms. you clench your jaw and turn back to the water, frowning when he steps closer to you again.
"you shouldn't be here," you say finally, closing the gap of exchanged words that rested along with the sound of the beating rain.
"yeah, i know," he bites his cheek, the same way he used to when he was trying to stay serious— trying not to smile and give into your antics when you teased him. "didn't think you'd be here."
"this place is my mind. i'm always here."
"usually your mind is on camp. the dreamscape would represent camp. your friends. it would represent your friends. but it's on yourself. how you feel about yourself. how... i made you feel. so you're here. and i didn't expect that."
"i didn't expect you to be here either."
he laughs. it's a hollow laugh, one that you can tell he forces out, but you know he's doing it to lighten the mood. to make you comfortable.
"I'm always here. just...thinking about you."
"you said you were waiting for me," you state.
"what did you mean?"
"exactly what i said," he replies quickly. "i knew you'd have to come eventually. i knew id see you again."
you stay quiet. you know he's right. you also knew eventually he'd get to you, maim your confidence and self love. the same self love he declared you should have, because he didn't
"understand how someone could hate you."
"i should go," you whisper finally: the words you've been trying to get out of your mouth, the ones that sat at the tip of your tongue like feet stuck to the ground of asphodel. "i should-"
"you should stay," he declares firmly. moments pass until you turn to him and stare at the dark brown orbs in his eyes, now seen through tears. he's looking at you like you're his lost dog that he's been looking everywhere for, because to him, you were. in a small voice, he says, "i miss you."
you scoff, forcing a sarcastic smile to grace your lips, even though there's nothing in you that wants to smile, even if it is sarcastic. "you left."
you hear the sand next to you get kicked, and he's grumbling. "i know. but you know why. i had to."
"you had to betray your friends and family? you had to betray me? your girlfriend? that's not how it works, luke. you know damn well."
luke huffs, looking up at the sky, the rain kissing his forehead as he does so. "maybe not for you. but for me, it's eat or be eaten. power and glory and nothing else matters. i can't ignore that."
"power and glory? really? that's all that matters?" you try to say it with solid anger and firmness in your voice, but it comes out shaky and hurt. "was it always that way? did i ever matter to you?"
"of course you mattered!" he turns to you as if he can't believe what you're saying. "you matter. more than... more than anything. you are glory. that's why it matters to me. you are glory. and i don't care if i'm the first foolish halfblood to say it, but i don't care for glory if it means that you're not the definition."
you bite your lip, trying to remind yourself that this is the enemy. this is luke. but this is your luke.
"why'd you leave, then?"
he rolls his eyes; you already brought this up. "i want to protect you. give you the life you deserve. you don't deserve one where you're controlled by the gods. where you have to constantly obey them on hand and foot. you're not their dog. i want to be sure of that."
"you left me. why couldn't you have at least taken me with you?"
"why would i purposefully put you in danger like that? with me, everyone on the other side has no instructions whether to kill you or not. but if you're there at camp, you're off limits. i already told my army they are not to lay a finger on you. you're safer without me."
"no i'm not! i can't take this. if someone doesn't kill me first, i'm going to kill myself"
"y/n, please stop yelling."
you inhale sharply, and exhale sharply. in and out. like the way luke taught you to when you had those panic attacks during the night and somehow even your powers couldn't get you past nightmares. "i really need to go."
"i need you," he whispers. he holds out his arms, as if for a hug, and he begs, "i need to hold you."
"no!" you say quickly. "that's not... that's not fair. because you can wake up and know this was only a dream, and possibly forget it. but i have to live with this. this is real for me. i'm not asleep right now. i feel everything."
"i do, too," he groans. "you taught me how to become lucid, remember?"
twisting your spit between your teeth, your tongue, you weave a sigh through them and groan. "you don't get to hug me. not when i hoped every night that you'd come back and do it in person. in real life. prayed to every god alive, even your father, that you'd tell me it was all some sick joke and you'd be good again."
"i'm so lonely," he cries, and for the first time you realize that the water pouring down your cheeks aren't only the drops of rain. also his tears. "i need to hold you. let me hold you, y/n."
"you don't deserve that. you don't get to."
"one last time. you won't see me here ever again. just let me hold you. i need to... i need to remember what it feels like."
your lips twist and curl into all shapes of a different frown, and you wipe the now forming tears on your face that mirror the ones on luke's.
"i'm so sorry," he whispers. he's staring into your eyes, and the eye contact feels lethal. this is the man your camp trains you to fight, trains you to kill when you have the chance. but here you are, staring deep into his eyes as you inch closer and closer to him—
how did you get here?
you realize you're wrapped in his arms. his arms are tied taut around your waist and he's gripping on your pajama shirt like it's the only thing holding him from falling into tartarus. he's whispering, i'm sorry's, and i love you's, and you find yourself sobbing into his neck, too. he sighs, pulling away and trailing kisses down your jaw.
trembling fingers are raking through his hair, and you get the same feeling you used to when you'd twirl his curls and lather conditioner into his it in the shower. the rain is pouring down onto the two of you like that same shower water, and you're holding each other and in love, and suddenly you're one year younger and you're luke's girl, and luke is your boy.
"i love you, i'm so, so sorry. wanna go back and fix it. 's too late. i can't take this. 'm so lonely. i miss you so much." luke is rambling and rambling into your hair. he's pulling it a little bit as his hands squeeze and trail up and down your back and he captures a bit of it with his hands.
"i know," you whisper. you can't forgive him right now. but you can hold him.
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depravitycentral · 10 months
Text
Partnership
Yandere! Uvogin x fem! reader
Tw: kidnapping, stalking, theft, threats of violence, implied non-con, if your name is Stacy pretend it isn't, Stockholm Syndrome, brief mention of vomiting, Nobunaga is featured a bit in this but don't worry he doesn't want you, fem reader, MDNI
This is dedicated to @ramwrites, who is amazing and wonderful and offered to write me a welcome back gift, and I couldn't not give something back in return! Thanks for letting me write this for you; your writing is so good and makes me all giggly and inspired. For those interested, please check out her Shalnark piece - I haven't read it yet, but I'm sure it's just as good as everything else Ram produces.
WC: 10K
I do not condone any of the actions described in this post - this is fiction and should be treated as such. If you or a loved one is in a similar situation to anything contained in this post or my blog in general, please seek help. You're in charge of your internet consumption; please make responsible choices. With that, enjoy! 
“So you went and got yourself kidnapped, huh?” Uvogin asks, cocking a brow at you.
               You, who’s tied to a metal chair, gagged and blindfolded, very clearly having no fucking clue what is going on.
               You squirm, sitting up straight at the sound of a new, unfamiliar voice. Your cute little sleeping shorts had ridden up a bit, exposing more of your thigh than you were probably comfortable with, and Uvo notices with a distant sense of enjoyment that the thin nightshirt you’re sporting is doing very little to hide the way the cold air is affecting your chest.
               You’re weak, really; a pathetic little thing that has him scoffing and crossing his arms.
               “Listen up, I’m only gonna tell you this once. A friend of yours – Stacy, was it? Anyway, this friend of yours got herself noticed by the wrong type of guy.” He starts, plopping down and sitting in his own identical metal chair, just without the restraints.
               You stop struggling when he mentions her name, and he takes this as a sign to continue.
               “See, Nobuanga’s not a bad guy. He’s a little rough around the edges, sure, but any guy who isn’t is hardly worth knowing.” He chuckles at his own assessment of his closest friend, though you don’t seem to share the sentiment. “Stacy works at that shitty little restaurant he loves – the one with the sticky, greasy booths and the fries that come drenched with salt and are so limp they literally drip oil.”
               He shivers at the mere memory, the hamburger he’d ordered barely worth eating.
               “Don’t know what she did, exactly, but somehow he’s smitten – she’s got him all fucked up, ranting and raving about how beautiful she is and how she smiles at him all the time and flirts with him on the clock. Real annoying, if you ask me.” He sighs heavily, letting his thumb sit at his chin as he loses himself in the story of his best friend falling in love – with your best friend, no less.
               “And then she quit her job, I’m sure you know. Started working up at that movie theater – more shitty, oily food, just popcorn instead of fries this time.” He laughs again. “Nobunaga went crazy over that, you know, thinking that maybe she wanted to work in a more intimate setting like that so that he could sneak her off into some abandoned theater and get some one-on-one quality time, if you know what I mean.”
               You grimace, at both the implications of his last statement and the mention of Stacy quitting. You know exactly why she’d quit – it was the whole reason you’d been staying at her place, really. She was convinced she had a stalker, that there was this crazy man who used to bother her at the diner and follow her home. It’d scared her, obviously, and she’d requested – with a guilty look and fiddling thumbs – if you’d be willing to spend the next few nights are her place with her, because maybe if there was more than one person home he wouldn’t get gutsy and break in. Of course you’d agreed, believing her fully and not wanting to leave her alone to deal with this crazed freak.
               Although now, you’re starting to regret that decision just a bit.
               “As I’m sure you know, it didn’t change much. Pretty stupid, to be honest – if a stalker’s that dedicated, how the hell is a change of occupation going to change anything? Chick’s pretty dumb, if you ask me.” He shrugs, and although you can’t see it through your blindfold, you’re sure his face is awfully apathetic about the whole situation. “She was ignoring him, refusing to serve him at the theater, reporting him to her manager, even calling the police and getting a description of him circulating. She was going to get a restraining order against him, even – again, like that’d do shit.”
               He snorts, and you bite into the gag harder.
               Sighing, he looks up at the ceiling. “See, that’s the thing about Nobunaga. He might seem a little lazy sometimes, but he’s got a heart of gold when it comes to the ones he cares about. He’d do anything for that woman – steal for her, kill for her, anything at all. He’s a sap, totally obsessed with the chick, but it’s kind of sweet in a way, I guess. Means he really cares about her. Isn’t that funny? Her stalker really is in love with her.”
               You don’t find it particularly funny, but you can’t say much.
               “Anyways, the police finally got a sighting of him last night. Went through the system pretty fast – I’m a little impressed, to be honest. Normally takes those bastards much longer to process things. Regardless, a few too many sirens were going last night, even a few cars parked outside the apartment he’s been squatting in, yelling his name in those big, gaudy megaphones of theirs. Caused a real stir, and sent the guy into a panic.”
               He takes a moment to breath, tapping his foot lightly on the ground. “So what does he do? He calls me, in the middle of the night, talking so fast that I can’t even understand the guy. All I’m hearing is Stacy this, Stacy that, police and blah blah blah recognized. I had to force the words out of him before it made any sense, the idiot.” That same laugh rattles in your ears.
               “Eventually I got him to be coherent, and he told me that he had to ‘make his move’, whatever the hell that meant. Said he couldn’t wait anymore, that he had to take Stacy and run – the police were coming, and even though it’s not hard to take out a couple of poorly trained guys, it’s still a pain in the ass and Shizuku’s not here to clean up his mess.
               “Anyways, he starts begging me – literally, actually pleading with me, imagine that – to come and help him out. He told me there’s this other chick at her place – some girl she’s been keeping around for some unknown reason, and he needs someone to take care of the body.” Your blood goes cold, fear suddenly creeping back up your throat.
               Was he going to kill you? Why was he bothering to tell you all this if he was just planning on slicing open your neck? Did he find some sick pleasure in prolonging your death?
               He notices your discomfort, it seems, because soon he’s rolling his eyes, scoffing at you. “Calm down. You’re such a bad actor – can’t even see your face, really, and I know you’re scared shitless now. I’m not going to kill you, don’t get your panties in a twist.”
               You calm slightly, but not much.
               “As I was saying, there’s this girl he needs me to take care of – a quick death, nothing too flashy, which makes me immediately ask why the hell he’d request me of all people, when every time I kill it’s messy. It’s kind of my trademark, you know?”
               You didn’t, and you hoped it’d stay that way.
               He sighs again. “Anyways, I head on over to Stacy’s apartment, meeting Nobunaga outside and listening to him run down the plan. He’s going to run inside and knock her out, pulling her out of bed and running off to God knows where he’s got all set up for the two of them. And while he’s busy doing that, I’m supposed to head in and eliminate the friend. Seemed easy enough, if not a bit tedious, so I agree and we head inside, keeping mind of the sirens still in the distance.
               “Everything’s going smoothly, except once we get the front door open, it becomes very clear that Nobunaga was stupid and panicked and didn’t bother to doublecheck if Stacy was actually asleep.” He pauses to sigh dramatically, like it’s some big annoyance. “She’s fully awake, standing about ten feet away from the door, and then she starts fucking screaming.”
               You remember that bit – the screaming, that is, because it had woken you up from your slumber on Stacy’s couch. Everything is still blurry after that, disorientation fogging your brain from being so abruptly woken up.
               “She’s yelling and screeching, and if Nobunaga hadn’t been there I probably would’ve killed her myself just to get her to shut the fuck up. She’s got one of those high, shrill, shrieky voices, you know? The kind that really drive me up the wall - it’s damn annoying.” He pauses, looking at you skeptically. “Hope you haven’t got one of those, things’ll get messy real quick if you do.”
               You hope you don’t, either.
               “He rushes forward and tries to grab her, but she swats at him and, get this, manages to punch him in the dick.” He laughs aloud at that, slapping his knee and throwing his head back. “This weak-ass girl manages to get him on the ground flat, stupid ass’s hands clutching at his dick, and what does she do in the meantime? She runs over to the couch, grabbing this girl and staring back at me like I’m some monster.”
               You make a noise through the gag, but Uvogin ignores it.
               “I’ve gotta hand it to Stacy, though, she’s got guts. She starts yellin’ at us about how she won’t let us kill the girl, how she’ll kill herself before she lets us get our hands on her, and immediately Nobunaga crumbles. I don’t know why the idiot didn’t think of the possibility earlier, but he totally freezes up when she threatens that, just gaping like a fish. It was pretty awkward for me, to be honest, because watching him get so thoroughly rejected was giving me serious second hand embarrassment. I mean, the chick literally said she’d rather kill herself than let Nobuanga take her – pretty harsh if you ask me.”
               He looks back at your covered face, letting his gaze linger on the edges of the blindfold. “So he panics and gives into her demand, telling her he won’t kill her friend – says that he’ll just take her too, so that way everyone’s happy.”
               He frowns a bit at you, scratching the back of his neck. “Well, everyone except you, probably. And except Stacy, too, probably. And except me. So really, Nobunaga’s the only happy one.”
               Your face would sour if it was able to.
               “Anyways, it wasn’t hard to knock them both out and bring ‘em to their respective holding places. I’ve got no clue where the hell Nobunaga’s keeping his chick, but I’m sure you’ve figured out that you’re Stacy’s little friend.”
               You nod, slowly, the movement limited by your restraints. Your wrists have gone numb and your ankles feel bruised and sore, the ropes keeping them pinned the legs of the chair making blood flow difficult.
               “So, what to do with you now.” His voice is wistful, like he’s actually contemplating, and that same familiar fear washes over you again.
               He groans, the chair skidding out behind him as he stands to his full height. “Would you quit it with the fear? I already told you I’m not killing you, are you even listening to me?”
               You nod again, faster this time.
               Uvogin sighs, shuffling forward towards you. You can hear him approaching, and although your shoulders stiffen up, you try not to look as terrified as you feel. It doesn’t seem to work all that well, but he spares you another comment about it.
               Soon the blindfold is ripped off your head, leaving your hair messy and out of place, your eyes squinting and blinking rapidly to adjust to the rather bright white light hanging over you and what you can now see is an absolute behemoth of a man.
               He’s fucking huge – towering over you in every sense of the word, muscles practically bulging out of his body with how defined and massive they are. Black hairs cover every inch of his body you can see, even his arms and especially the bits of chest peeking out of his white top. Ragged, unruly hair sweeps down to his shoulders, making the muscles of his neck look even firmer, and you gulp. Any chance of escaping has basically left you now – there’s no way in hell you could ever beat that, especially if he’d already managed to kidnap you once.
               He clears his throat and your gaze is brought up to his face, a small, strange wave of embarrassment flooding through you as you realize you’ve been caught staring. He’s smirking, though, and you take in the sharp line of his jaw, the thick, dark eyebrows that frame equally dark eyes. He’s attractive, in a strange, rugged sort of way, and you immediately feel sick at the thought.
               “You like what you’re seein’?” He teases, and you immediately look away, still unable to reply with the gag covering your mouth.
               He laughs, and sets his hands on his lips. “Well, looks like you’re stuck with me. Before you freak out, I can’t kill you because that damn Stacy really seems to care about you, and she’s told Nobunaga she’ll kill herself if she doesn’t get regular proof that you’re still alive.”
               A flame of hope ignites in your chest, and internally you thank Stacy, even if this whole situation is less than ideal.
               He seems to sense your sudden upturn in mood, chuckling with a condescending lilt. “Oh no, princess, that doesn’t mean I’m letting you go. No, you’ve gotta stay put, because now that you know what I look like, you’ll go to the cops and report me as fast as those little legs of yours can manage.”
               You shake your head at that, eyes glistening with tears as he shuts down your last hope of escaping. Please, you internally beg him, hoping he’ll somehow be able to sense this too. I won’t, I promise!
               His gaze narrows at you, before that same smirk is back. “I’m sure if you could talk you’d be telling me how you’ll never tell a soul, but you and I both know that’s bullshit. So I’ll save us both some time and keep you here, so that I don’t have to track you down again and lock you back up once you’ve just gotten free.”
               You visibly deflate, and if Uvogin had been a kinder man, he would’ve almost felt bad for you. But instead, he just hums, crouching down in front of you. Even squatting he’s still taller than you, and it does nothing to make you feel less scared.
               “Now listen up, here are the rules. I’m a pretty nice guy, all things considered, so don’t break my rules and I won’t break your bones.”
               Your eyes get wide, but you nod along. He smiles, patting your knee.
               “That’s good, see? You’re already doing better than that Stacy girl, at least you’re not fighting me every step of the way.” Something about his statement makes guilt eat away at your chest – are you supposed to be fighting more? There doesn’t really seem to be a point – this man is massive, and you’re all bound and unable to move. You’re doing the best you can, right?
               “First,” He holds up a finger, “don’t even bother trying to escape. I’m bigger than you, faster than you, stronger than you, and smarter than you. There’s nothing you can try that I won’t see through, and you’ll end up regretting it more than you can imagine.
               “Second, no trying to hurt yourself. Nobunaga will kill me if I let you die, and it’d be a pain to deal with him.” He fixes you a stern look, and you nod.
               “Third, don’t go digging through my shit. I’m doing my buddy a favor by keeping you here, and if I find you snooping around… He didn’t say anything about roughing you up a bit, and it might be good for Stacy to see you with some bruises or a cast or two.” His threat doesn’t go unheard, and you nod again, throat bobbing as you swallow.
               He stares at you for a moment more, gaze calculating and judging whether you’ve really accepted his conditions, before strong fingers come up to untie the knot keeping your gag in place.
               “Don’t you scream, I’ll have to shut you up if you do.” He warns, before pulling the fabric away. Immediately you’re flexing your jaw, the muscle aching as you move it, and he watches with a neutral expression. You’re still tied up, unable to move really, and Uvogin gets a fleeting thought of how pitiful you look.
               “Um,” You start, your voice a bit hoarse from being so dry and unused for the last few hours. “What’s your name?”
               He blinks, before laughing a bit. “Of all the questions you could’ve asked, all the things you could’ve said and done as soon as you woke up from learning you’ve been kidnapped, and that’s what you chose? Shit, you wouldn’t survive in the wild, would you?”
               Shame creeps up your neck at his belittlement, but before you can defend yourself he’s answering. “It’s Uvogin.”
               You nod, not willing to look at him. It’s silent for a few moments, before he sighs again and reaches forward to untie the rope shackling your ankles and wrists. As soon as you’re free, you try to stretch out your limbs, keeping a weary eye on the man – Uvogin.
               What a stupid name.
               “Well, the fact that you’re not screaming your head off is a promising sign. Get up, I’ll show you where you’ll be sleeping.” He orders, already taking off towards the door in the corner of the small room. You try to follow him, but your legs aren’t moving right, and it takes you a while to make your way over there. He looks irritated at your lack of speed, but says nothing, only holding open the door until you make your way through.
               You’re led down into a rather sparse apartment, only furnished with a single gray couch against one wall (with a few stains on it that make you wince a bit), a TV and some cabinets, a wooden table and two chairs, and a beat-up fridge in the adjoining kitchen. Everything’s clean, but the space lacks any sort of personality, and it makes you uncomfortable.
               “That’s your bed, extra blankets are in the closet. If you need anything tell me, and I might snag it for you next time I’m out on a job.” Something about the way he says ‘snag’ makes you nervous, so you just mutter a small affirmation.
               He gives you one last glance over, his eyes once again lingering on your chest, before stepping through the doorway.
               “Wait, Uvogin!” Your voice, a bit wobbly and unsure, makes him turn back, his brow cocked and curiosity dancing on his features. (And a bit of surprise, too, because he hadn’t expected you to say anything to him, or even use his name. Maybe you weren’t as skittish and weak as you seemed – though, he doubted that.)
               “Um, is it possible for me to see Stacy soon?” You asked, voice growing smaller with every word. He blinks, before standing up a bit straighter.
               “Actually, you’re in luck. Nobunaga called me about an hour ago and let me know we’re meeting up in a few days – he said it would be good for Stacy to have a ‘playdate’ with you. Whatever the fuck that means.” Uvogin shrugs, looking entirely uninterested, and you bristle at Nobunaga’s choice of words. Poor Stacy.
               Excitement brews in your chest; at least you’ll have a familiar face, and hopefully the stranger hasn’t done anything too terrible to your friend. Nodding, you glance back to the floor, wishing the hulking man staring at you would just leave. He does, a few moments later, and only then do you allow yourself to slump onto the bed he’s assigned you. The bedroom is bare like the rest of the home, with a twin bed set in the corner and a small set of drawers sitting nearby. It makes you laugh humorlessly – were you supposed to fill that chest? With what? You hadn’t brought anything with you, and you seriously doubted Uvogin would let you return home to grab some of your clothes.
               Sighing, you sat onto the bed, the mattress firm under you. Distantly, some part of you was pleased – at least the bed would be comfortable enough.
               Time passes slowly as you sit on the bed – not your bed, not yet. You stare at the wall ahead of you, the fear slowly seeping out of your system until only exhaustion remains. Sleep eventually takes over, and although you try to fight it, you’re slipping into a dreamless slumber before long.
               Uvogin’s tolerable, you’ve found. He’s certainly not nice, nor is he an especially great person to be around, but he could be much worse, you suppose. He’s fed you twice daily for however long you’ve been stuck here (it feels like a week, so you’re assuming it is, if only to stave off any self-doubt that’s creeping into the corners of your mind), and the food’s not terrible. It’s clearly takeout, the packaging sometimes even having Chinese characters on it or restaurant logos, and you’ve been mostly satisfied with his choices so far. He’ll sometimes ask you what you want, and while you were too scared to answer the first few times (which only makes him scowl and roll his eyes, muttering a small damn, Nobunaga owes me one), eventually you’d felt safe enough to be honest.
               He hasn’t hurt you, either. At least, not yet. You’re aware he could, if he wanted to – those muscles make it hard to forget, and you’d seen him crush his phone in his hand like a bug when a phone call with someone named Franklinwent poorly.
               He’s scary, still, but you’ve reached the point now where you aren’t practically hyperventilating every time he enters the room. You still keep him in your field of vision, weary for any sudden changes in his behavior, but every day that passes has you growing more complacent with your position. The constant threat of Stacy potentially facing consequences for your actions doesn’t deter you from being on your best behavior, either.
               Besides, sometimes he’s even a little bit funny – not that you’d ever laugh at his jokes, but he has this weird sense of humor that you think you’d like, if the situation had been different. If you’d met him on the street you definitely would’ve tried to cross to the other side, but you would’ve found him oddly charming, his snide remarks and cocky air a bit entertaining.
               You try not to think about that, though, because the mere presence of these thoughts means the Stockholm Syndrome is starting to kick in. And while you aren’t the most resilient person on the planet, even you have to admit it’s a bit early for that.
               Sighing, you take another bite of the curry he’d brought you, pleasantly surprised that the spice level was perfect. Uvogin didn’t have many rules, it was true, but he did have a few unspoken ones – one of which being that meals, particularly take-out meals, were to be eaten at the small, rickety table. Together, which wasn’t ideal.
               “I’ve gotta make sure you don’t try to starve yourself or choke.” He’d told you the first time, grabbing your shoulders and forcing you into the seat across from his, the noodles sitting in front of you still packaged neatly in their container. At first you’d been nervous he would try to poison you, but eventually hunger got the best of you and you were slurping the noodles down, still keeping a nervous eye on the hulking man in front of you.
               “So, big news.” He starts, taking a bite out of his chicken. He always took big bites, you’d noticed, but he ordered enough food that even if his pace was twice as fast as yours, he never finished before you.
               You glance up at him, trying not to let toomuch curiosity show on your face, but he seems to realize anyway.
               “I know you haven’t been up to much, but don’t make your excitement so obvious. Hurts my feelings to know you think I’m so boring.” He’s joking, you think, and to sate him you attempt to smile.
               “Nobunaga called me again this morning; today’s the day.”
               You practically choke on your food, eyes blowing wide and your hands beginning to shake. Finally, finally you’d be able to see Stacy – you’d been worried sick about her the last week or so, terrified that her transition to the life of being a captive hadn’t gone as smoothly as your own. (You snorted bitterly at that – smooth probably wasn’t the best word for how you’d been feeling, but at least you hadn’t been hit yet, or assaulted or any number of things. Hopefully Nobunaga wasn’t any worse of a person than your own captor.)
               Uvogin is watching you, you realize, with a strange look in his eye. As soon as you glance up at him you look away again, clearing your throat and trying to keep your voice even as you ask, “That’s good, it’ll be nice to see her again.”
               It’s silent for a moment, before his booming laugh makes you wince a bit. “Yeah, I’m sure you are. Finish up, I don’t like wasting food. Once you’re done we’ll head out - try to not to choke.”
               He says that right as you start shoveling the food into your mouth, hoping that eating quicker will mean you can see Stacy quicker. He chuckles at you, but you follow his orders and slow down a bit. He throws you one more glance, that cocky smile on his lips, before digging into his own food again.
               He’s eating a bit faster than normal, too, you notice.
               He apologizes with an insincere tone as he ties the blindfold back on you (he’d told you that you can’t know where you are just in case you decide to get rebellious and run away), and soon you’re stuffed into a car. Everything’s hard to keep track of when you can’t see, but Uvogin’s talking (like normal), so you try to tune into the sound of his voice to help the time pass.
               “Now listen, you might not wanna touch her too much, Nobunaga’s a bit…” He trails off, and you can hear his hand tightening on the steering wheel. “Possessive. You’re her friend and all, and I’m sure he won’t hurt you, especially not in front of her, but be careful.”
               You nod, absentmindedly.
               “Also, don’t be too surprised if she doesn’t look the way she used to. He was always going on about how she was dressed too inappropriately in her day-to-day life, so she might be a little underdressed.”
               He’d hesitated to say underdressed, and you tried not to think about what that could mean.
               It’s quiet for a few moments, and you shift in the car seat. He’d let you sit in the front, an unexpected luxury, but you didn’t like that he could see you while you couldn’t see him. He wouldn’t hurt you, you were mostly confident of that now, but who knew what he had planned.
               “We’re almost there. If things go badly, I’ll get you out of there. You’re pretty damn weak, a broken bone would probably take a few weeks for you to heal. I don’t want to deal with you being injured, and I’m sure you don’t, either.”
               Your lips must’ve given away your fear, because a moment later he’s sighing. “Did you know that you practically reek your emotions? I feel like I can smell ‘em, even when I can’t even see half your damn face.”
               You don’t have anything to say to that, but you force yourself to speak anyway, not wanting to dignify his last comment. “Do you think – well, do you think Nobunaga will want to hurt me?”
               Uvogin ponders your question for a moment, surprised that you’d spoken up. You hadn’t done much talking in the time he’d had you – he was sure it was because you were scared, but it was nice to hear you talking to him like you weren’t scared shitless of him. Even if you had every reason to be so terrified.
               “Honestly, probably. Especially if you touch her.”
               You suck in a breath, and Uvogin hums. “But it’s not going to happen.”
               “What do you mean?”
               You could practically hear his toothy grin.
               “It’s my job to protect you, right? So I will. Even if the one you need protecting from is the same guy who wants you to be protected.”
               Something in his tone gives you the impression he means those words more than he’s letting on, and you shiver as you imagine just who this Nobunaga guy could possibly be.
               “Oh my god, oh my god – you’re alive! Thank god!” Stacy sobs, arms wrapping around you like a vice before you can even respond. You clutch her back just as tightly, burying your face into her brown curls, a few tears pricking at your eyes. You’d been nervous that Nobunaga would’ve hurt her, with the way Uvogin was describing him, but after a thorough look-over, you find no bruises or marks marring her olive skin.
               Eventually she pulls back, but keeps her hands firmly grasping your shoulders. Her eyes are red with tears, and her lower lip is wobbling. She’s not hurt, but she looks bad – there’s heavy bags under eyes and her hair is frazzled, her lips look swollen and she’s clutching onto you hard. Really hard.
               “Stacy, are you hurt?” You ask, letting your hands cup her cheeks. You see Nobunaga – who Uvogin had pointed out with a small that’s the guy when you’d walked in – stiffen up at that, and Uvogin’s warning flashes through your mind. You might not want to touch her. Right.
               Stacy glances over at her captor, and you follow her gaze, only to see Uvogin give you a small nod and drag his friend out the door by the collar of his purple kimono, calling over his shoulder that they’ll be back in exactly five minutes, and that they’ll know if you try to escape.
               As soon as the door closes, Stacy pulls you in for another hug, the words flying out of her mouth so quickly you can barely understand her. “He’s – Nobunaga, he’s horrible. He never leaves me alone, and he treats me like I’m some incompetent little baby, and he’s always touching me and I just – I can’t –“
               You cut her off by pressing her face into your neck again, rubbing the back of her head and letting her cry. You’re crying too, now, but your tears fall silently compared to her sobbing.
               You don’t say much, because what can you say? It would be a lie to tell her that everything’s going to be okay, and every other reassurance that dances on the tip of your tongue just feels wrong, like you’d be pointedly lying to her. Instead, you let her get it out, her grip on you never loosening. You’d known Nobunaga had been the root of all her anxieties the last few months, long before he’d gotten the gall to kidnap her. And while you were happy that she wasn’t hurt, it still pained you to see her like this.
               Eventually she’d calmed down, and you feel her pull back and wipe at her sniffling nose. “I’m so sorry.” She whispers to you, looking like she’s on the verge of crying again. “I didn’t mean to drag you into this mess, I should’ve just gone quietly and left you alone. I shouldn’t have asked you to stay with me for a few weeks, now you’re really stuck with that monster.”
               You don’t tell her that it’s okay, because it’s not. Some part of you is still bitter and resentful towards her for involving you, because she’s right. You could be still living your life if she hadn’t requested you to help deter her stalker from making a move. But despite your anger, you can’t find it in yourself to hate her. Not when she’s like this – not when she’s probably experiencing something even worse than you.
               “It doesn’t matter now, all that matters is that we’re both alive, and we’re both okay. Or, at least, okay as we can be, given the situation.” You tell her, smiling softly. She blinks at you, eyes wide and vulnerable, before nodding and swallowing.
               “Yeah, I was worried that you wouldn’t be, with the way Nobunaga was talking about Uvogin.” Her voice was hoarse still, and you laughed humorlessly at that.
               “Yeah, well, he hasn’t hurt me yet, so I think I’ll be okay. He mostly just ignores me, honestly, so I guess I’m lucky.” Your attempt at optimism doesn’t make Stacy smile like you’d hoped. Rather, her lips pull into a frown and her eyebrows furrow.
               “He ignores you? That doesn’t make sense.”
               You expression mirrors hers. “What? I mean, the only reason I got kidnapped too was insurance so that you wouldn’t kill yourself –“
               Stacy’s face morphs into one of horror, and her grip on your shoulders goes slack.
               Quickly you’re backpedaling, worried the mention of her self-imposed death might’ve triggered something you wanted to avoid. “I’m not saying it’s your fault, I totally understand why you –“
               “Alright, time’s up.” Nobunaga’s voice interrupts, and knuckly hands are suddenly on your shoulders, pushing you aside so that Nobunaga can stand in front of Stacy. You stumble back, falling backwards against Uvogin’s hard chest, immediately standing up straight.
               Nobunaga’s cupping Stacy’s chin, and you can see from this angle the way he smiles, a slight pink color flooding his cheeks. It makes you sick, and the pained look on Stacy’s face only makes your gut sink more. She’s looking at you still, and something about the way her brows are cocked inward that makes you feel like she’s almost pitying you.  
               “Did you miss me, baby?” Nobunaga’s cooing down at her, and it makes your skin crawl. Uvogin sighs from behind you and grabs your wrist, dragging you out of the room. His grip is surprisingly gentle, and as you watch Stacy slowly fade from your view, you can’t help but be slightly grateful that at least your captor isn’t leaning down for a kiss like hers.
               The car ride home is mostly quiet, and it’s not until you’re nearing the end of your time in the vehicle that Uvogin breaks the silence.
               “So, what did you talk about while we were gone? Girly shit?” You think he’s attempting a joke, but you can’t even pretend to laugh at it.
               “She’s not happy.” You comment, voice slightly flat, and Uvogin snorts at your words.
               “Of course she’s not happy, she’s just been kidnapped. And by her stalker, no less – would anyone be happy? Hell, are you happy?” He asks you, and you blanch at his question. Somehow, though, it feels like some sort of trap, so you stay quiet.
               He doesn’t say anything more until he’s pulling you out of the car, your footsteps hesitant and clumsy because he’d put that damn blindfold on you again. He guides you up to the apartment, and soon you’re standing in the living room area, the fabric falling from your eyes.
               “I’ve got some errands to run today, so I’ll be gone for a while. Do you want anything while I’m out?” He asks, standing in front of the door with his arms crossed. You’re a bit touched that he’s offering to get you something, but you try not to focus on it. Of course you’re feeling grateful for him – he may be holding you captive, yes, but at least he hasn’t tried to kiss you or touch you. Poor Stacy didn’t share your luck.
               “Um, maybe some chips? I don’t care what flavor, just something crunchy…” You trail off, looking at him nervously. You’d never requested anything before, and some part of you is convinced he’d only asked you the question to laugh in your face and deny you.
               He cracks a smile and nods, hand already on the doorknob. “Okay. Okay, but you’d better be prepared to share, because I happen to be a big chip fan myself. So don’t get greedy, yeah?”
               You half-smile, rubbing at your arm. “Yeah, I won’t be.”
               He steps out the door, and once again the apartment is silent, his presence gone and all movement within the room gone, too.
               The TV won’t work for you, you know that, but you’re still trying to get it to behave. Uvogin had to type in some password every time he turned it on, and it was too long and encoded for you to ever be able to decipher it. Still, you were clicking the power button of the remote over and over, hoping against hope that it would somehow short circuit and bypass that password screen. When it didn’t, you only sighed, rising to your feet and wandering towards the monitor.
               Uvogin, you’d learned, was surprisingly meticulous – surprisingly organized, really. Meaning there was a chance he’d written down the password to the TV and had it stored somewhere. He’d only been gone for about a half hour, if the clock was any indication, and you had a lot of time to kill before he returned home. Not that he was your only source of entertainment – though, you’d read the single book he owned three times already.
               Your knees crack as you kneel down in front of the cupboard the TV was sitting on, the wooden doors creaking as they open. The shelves are mostly empty – a few older remotes, and a cable channel guide.
               Frustrated, you huff and let your shoulders slump, trying to decide what to do next. The TV obviously wasn’t planning on cooperating, though there was a cupboard right next to the one you’re searching through that could potentially hold the answer.
               Uvogin’s rules distantly float through your mind, his gruff voice replaying in perfect clarity. Third, don’t go digging through my shit. Glancing back up the clock, you bite your lip. You had time, because while he was massive and huge and scary, there was no way he could get all his errands done in just thirty minutes.
               With a deep breath, you move over to the other cabinet, letting your fingers curl around the knob. The doors don’t creak when they open, and immediately you’re scanning the shelves. These ones are full – with boxes, each labeled with a date on them. Cocking a brow, you examine the dates. January 4th – January 25th, April 29th – May 7th, and so on.
               Intrigued, you slowly slide out one of the boxes, noticing not a single bit of dust is sitting on the cover. He must use this cabinet much more often than the one you’d been searching through previously, as a thick layer of dust had sprung up in your face the moment you opened the cabinet door.
               The box itself is light, but you still set it down in front of you, your fingers delicate and careful, too worried that you’ll break something if you press too hard. And then Uvogin would know, surely, especially if he truly used this cabinet that often.
               Slowly, you take off the box’s cover, and immediately your brows are scrunching together. What the hell?
               When you’d imagined the kind of ‘shit’ Uvogin didn’t want you to snoop through, you hadn’t pegged it to be this. Whatever this was, that is.
               It looked like a box full of receipts – tons of pieces of paper, all in weird sizes or shapes that looked like they were ripped out of some sort of notebook. The handwriting is messy, the letters all crammed together and difficult to decipher. You pick the paper on top up, turning it this way and that, trying to read the text.
               Her: Sorry, I know it’s late, but I need to ask you a quick question.
               Them: Yeah? What’s up?
               Her: Do you think he’s alright? Chris, I mean – he hasn’t called me back for a few days, and I’m worried about him.
               Them: You know Chris, it always takes him a while to respond. I wouldn’t worry, he’s just unpredictable.
               Her: Yeah, I guess…
               [6 second pause]
               Them: Go to sleep, it’s late. You’ve got work in the morning, right?
               Her: Yeah, I do. Okay, okay, I’m getting into bed now. Goodnight.
               Them: Goodnight, call me when you hear back from him.
               Her: Okay.
               What was this? The ambiguity of it all confused you – who was her? Them? Chris?
               You furrowed your brows, confusion sitting in your gut alongside a strange feeling. The hairs at the back of your neck prickled up, and a small pang of unease bolted through you.
               Setting the piece of paper back into the bin, you picked up another one. This one was shorter, more to the point.
               Her: Are we still on for Friday night?
               Them: Yeah! Freddy’s, nine o’clock sharp. I’m buying, remember.
               Her: You always say that, and you always get too shit faced to pay. Liar!
               Them: Hey, I just know how to have fun! You could learn how to do that, you know.
               Her: Yeah yeah, okay, I’ll see you later.
               Your fingers are shaking as you finish reading the small, triangular slip of paper. Your lips are slightly parted, brows still crunched together. Something about the interaction between Her and Them felt oddly familiar – like something you’d heard before.
               And the mention of Freddy’s. That’d been the name of a bar you frequented often with your friends, back before everything had gone to shit with Stacy.
               Unnerved, you set the piece of paper back in the box and slide the box into its place on the shelf, running your eyes back over the listed date. August 28th – September 16th. One of your best friend’s birthdays was in that range.
               Wiping your palms on your thighs, you try to calm the pounding of your heart. Something feels off, wrong in a way you can’t quite place. Surely, Freddy’s is a common enough name; it doesn’t necessarily mean your favorite bar. Plus, even if it does mean that particular bar, who knew who these people were. You surely don’t - who the hell is Chris?
               Wanting to put some distance between you and the cabinet, you get to your feet again and close it, wandering away into the little hallway connecting the living space, bathroom and two bedrooms. Cupping some water in your hands from the bathroom sink, you splash your face, letting the cold wash over your skin. Closing your eyes, you try to calm down. It doesn’t mean anything – how could it? You’re probably just all shaken up after seeing Stacy and her freaky captor. Nobunaga disturbed you, you can’t deny it.
               Sighing, you open your eyes, wiping your face with your towel. (Uvogin had been kind enough to give you one designated as your own, saving you from the horrible fate of having you dry your body with a towel that he’d already used.) Though you notice with a small start that the towel is wet, despite you not having showered recently. Odd.
               As you turn to leave the room, you notice a shirt sitting piled up in the corner. It was black, and surely not your own – holding it up, it looked big enough to dwarf you. Must be Uvogin’s, then.
               His bedroom is across from your own, and while you haven’t been inside it yet, it feels wrong to just leave his shirt on the floor, where it could get dirty and maybe even moldy. Besides, doing a little cleaning would keep you occupied – both from boredom, and from contemplating those weird slips of paper further.
               You slowly open the door, immediately getting hit with a wave of musk. Uvogin normally smelled decent, but the scent in here is strong enough to make you wince a bit, the overwhelming stench of sweat, mint, and male making you a bit nauseous. To your surprise, the room is spotless – a very, very large bed sits floated in the middle, a navy and black flannel comforter covering the top while a few large, puffy pillows sit at attention at the head. A few pairs of boots are lined up in the corner, and a single picture looks to be taped up on the wall above them. Curiously, you step forward, moving towards the photo.
               Uvogin had told you very little about himself – only that he worked as a contractor, of sorts, and that he didn’t have too many friends, so you wouldn’t have to worry about visitors. But now that you’re looking at the photo, you’re wondering if maybe that last statement hadn’t been so true – the photo is of a dozen or so people, all posing for the camera with various degrees of a smile on their face. Uvogin’s in the back, on the left side, his arm wrapped around the shoulders of a shorter blond man, his blue eyes in a wink and holding up his thumb. Uvogin’s smiling, and as you scan the photo, you stop when you hit Nobunaga, who’s seated in the front row next to a woman with big glasses and a modified cross necklace. Everyone looks happy, and briefly you wonder whether Uvogin considers these people friends. He must, if Nobunaga’s present – an odd sort of satisfaction worms its way into your chest at the thought. You don’t like Uvogin, surely not – but still, everyone needs friends, right? Even kidnappers.
               God, you really are starting to develop Stockholm Syndrome.
               Shaking your head to try and clear the thoughts, you approach his closet and snag a hanger, trying to hang up the shirt you’re holding in your arms. The thing is tall, and as you try to get the hanger’s hook to wrap over the metal bar, your eyes fall to the side, noticing something out of the corner of your vision.
               It’s a soft pink, and you cock a brow. Uvogin? Owning something pink?
               Eventually, and with a soft grunt, you get the hanger to successfully sit onto the bar, and immediately you’re investigating the pink thing. This goes directly against his rules, you know – you’re quite literally snooping, but hopefully he’d still be out for longer. Besides, even if he comes back, you could just tell him you’re putting away his shirt, and maybe he wouldn’t call you on your half-lie.
               Whatever the thing is, it’s wedged pretty far back in the closet – you’d only managed to catch a brief glimpse of it, and for good reason. There’s a storage container in the back of the closet, an organizer of sorts with some compartments that all seem to be stuffed full. It’s hard to see, the overhead light dim to begin with and not penetrating too deeply into the dark closet, but you’re able to fish out the pink fabric soon enough.
               It's lace, you realize, your curiosity only doubling. That same pin-prickly feeling is back, and as you slowly flatten out the cloth, your breath catches.
               It’s a thong. Pink and lacy, with a bow decorating the back, right over the tailbone.
               But more than that, the thong looks familiar. There’s a thread pulled on the front right side, and a stain on the fabric at the very bottom, looking awfully similar to the color your own discharge makes once it’s been washed.
               Your fingers are shaking again, and you stumble back a bit, the back of your knees catching onto the bed so that you fall back and land on your ass, too busy staring at the cloth in your hands to bother trying to situate yourself.
               These panties are yours.
               You’re sure of it – you know because Stacy bought them for you a few months ago. She’d cheekily handed them to you with a big, gaudy bow on top, a wink sent your way and a demure because I know you’ve got a date tonight, and I also know you haven’t gotten laid in way too long. That was the night you’d been set up on a blind date with a friend’s coworker. He’d been nice, though you hadn’t slept with him, and you hadn’t gone out again after that. He didn’t seem all that interested in you as a romantic pursuit, but he was funny, and you’d hoped you could become friends, at least.
               And his name was Chris. And he’d gone missing a few days after.
               You drop the panties, a hand coming up to cover your mouth.
               You don’t want to, and you know you shouldn’t, but before you can stop yourself you’re rushing forward to the closet, digging back to that storage compartment and rooting around for anything else you can find. It must be a coincidence; it has to be a coincidence. These can’t be your panties, you must be mistaken – why would Uvogin have these? How could he have these? You’d lost them in the laundry a while back.
               At least, that’s what you’d assumed.
               Pulling your hand back, you see you’ve grabbed a few items. They’re smaller, not clothing, but nonetheless incriminating. There’s a chapstick container, with a strange flavor on it that you’ve only seen once, back when you won it in some weird fundraising fair you’d been at for your job. Kiwi banana grape, it said in curling black lettering, and when you pop open the top, you notice it’s almost completely empty.
               There’s also a button; it’s black with a strange shape, one you recognize as being from your favorite jacket. It’d fallen off one day, but you’d been too busy walking around the city to have realized. It was a real bummer, because it’d rendered the jacket unwearable because too big a draft would sneak through it.
               And lastly, there’s a bandaid – it’s old, you can tell, with a kiddy pattern of some fairies and a dinosaur on it that the nurse had apologized for having to use, telling you it was all they had available at the time. You remembered it – it’d made you laugh that you’d gotten your flu shot and she’d patched it up with a bandaid designed for six year olds, even going so far as to snap a photo and send it in the group chat you kept with your friends.
               You feel sick.
               Throwing the small items back into the compartment, you rush to the bathroom, barely making it before you’re heaving, all the curry you’d forced down your throat earlier coming right back up.
               What the fuck?
               Who was Uvogin? Why did he have all of this? How did he have all of this? What did it mean? Your head’s rushing, too many thoughts and implications swimming through your oversaturated mind, and you have just barely enough strength to flush the toilet and stand up, staring at yourself in the mirror.
               Stacy’s words rush back to you as you examine your face, seeing your wide eyes and the way your chest is rising and falling with each harsh breath slipping through your lips. He ignores you? That doesn’t make sense. None of it makes sense – none of it at all. Why would your by-association captor have any of your personal items? Especially personal items you’d lost or thrown away literal months ago, long before you’d ever started staying over at Stacy’s?
               You know why, you just don’t want to admit it, and as you stare at yourself in the mirror, you try to come up with any other possible explanation. No. It can’t be. Stacy’s the one with the creepy stalker, not me.
               Suddenly, the sound of the front door’s lock clicking open makes you snap up, adrenaline suddenly coursing through your veins. Uvogin’s home.
               Immediately you’re running to your bed, jumping under the covers and shutting your eyes tightly, praying that Uvogin will think you’re asleep and won’t bother you. You need more time to figure this out – it’s all too much, and while it probably won’t be any easier the longer you wait, you need something.
               You can’t look at him yet. You won’t.
               “I got your chips! Didn’t know which flavor to choose, so I got three I think you might like. I’m serious, though, you have to share. I’m an animal, and I will steal your food.” He laughs at that, and you hear him set down the grocery bags on the kitchen counter. Your eyes are still closed so tightly that it hurts, and you ball your fists up in the blankets as hard as you can. You’d curled up into a fetal position, and you force yourself to stay still as you hear his loud footsteps coming down the hall.
               He calls your name, peeking his head into every room he passes. Soon he sees you in your bed, and although you look a little stiff, his shoulders immediately lose their tension. A smile flits across his lips, and he slowly, quietly shuts the door, retreating back to his own room.
               You sigh, peeling open your eyes and trying to get your breathing under control. You’d been holding your breath, and now that he’s actually home in the apartment, it’s difficult to not let yourself panic.
               It becomes much, much more difficult when you hear a noise come from his bedroom, though. What the hell’s this?
               There’s a muffled curse, and your blood runs cold as quick, heavy footsteps lead right up to your door. He swings it open and your eyes fly shut, trying desperately in vain to appear like you’re still sleeping.
               “Wake the fuck up.” He says, and immediately you open your eyes, your fear too strong to ignore. He’s holding the pink panties in his hands, and you realize with a small burst of terror that in your haste to get to the bathroom, you’d left them on the floor. In his room. Right where he can see that they’ve been moved.
               Fuck fuck fuck.
               "I only have three rules. What are they?” He barks, and you’re trying to curl up even smaller, hoping his promise of not hurting you will still ring true. Though, he’s lied about pretty much everything else – how do you know if that part wasn’t all a lie, too?
               “No hurting myself, no escaping, and no – no snooping.” You whisper, and Uvogin bares his teeth.
               “I’ve been good to you – patient, something that takes a hell of a lot of effort for me. And what do you do in return? You go and do one of the very few things I’ve forbidden.” He looks impossibly tall right now, towering over you with those muscles, the panties looking downright tiny between his monstrous fingers. “Tell me why. Explain to me why the hell you were snooping through my closet.”
               You shut your eyes again, too scared to look at him. “I was putting away a shirt you left in the bathroom. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I don’t know why I did it, please don’t hurt me, please –“
               He interrupts you with a huff, and you tense up, waiting for some blow to land. It doesn’t, though, and after a good thirty seconds, you finally peel an eye open, almost too scared to see what he’s doing.
               You don’t expect the small smile that’s sitting on his lips, nor the hand on his hip. He locks his eyes with yours, then sighs. “Well, this is most definitely not the way I wanted you to find out. See, I had this whole plan – Nobunaga came up with it, one of the very few things he’s ever thought of that actually impressed me.”
               You’re confused again, but that sick feeling still hasn’t gone away. All you can seem to look at are your panties, wedged in his fist.
               “He told me that since you and Stacy were so close, we could cut a deal – kidnap you both at once, get more bang for our buck. There was no way to hide Nobunaga’s feelings for Stacy, sure, but you? Well, you haven’t noticed anyone following you, have you?” Uvogin asks, cocking his head at you and letting his smile get a bit wider.
               You quickly shake your head no.
               “I’m better at this stuff than he is. He always gets too excited to talk to her, wants to interact and have her lookin’ at him. I get it, I really do. Even now, even with you scared shitless and looking at me like I’m about to kill you, just you acknowledging me is getting me hard as a fucking rock.”
               Involuntarily, your eyes dart down to his navel, and with a small, strangled sound of fear, you notice the way there’s a prominent bulge forming in those shorts of his.
               He laughs at your change in focus, and steps forward. Hooking a finger under your chin, he smirks down at you. “I’m better at hiding myself, and I was willing to play the long game, content with watching you until the right time came to snatch you up. But when Nobunaga offered, telling me there was a way to get you all to myself and make sure you grew to want me organically? Well, I couldn’t resist, could I?”
               You want to tell him he absolutely could’ve, or that you wouldn’t have ‘wanted him organically’, whatever the hell that meant, but your tongue doesn’t seem to be working.
               He leans down, face coming closer and closer to yours. “You had no idea, did you? How do you think I knew what kind of mattress to get you? How do you think I knew exactly what to order for you for takeout, even when you were too scared to tell me? How do you think I know what shampoo and conditioner to buy you, or even what kind of fucking cologne you like? Believe me, I’m only wearing this shit for you.”
               You’re frozen, unable to move, unable to do anything but stare at him.
               “Do you get it now, princess? See, Nobunaga doesn’t give two shits about whether you live or die – he’ll get Stacy to do what he wants no matter what. But me? I give a shit.” He’s so close to you that you can smell his breath. It’s minty, like he’s just recently brushed his teeth. The cold smell only makes you shiver, fear still tingling up your spine.
               “Why?” You whisper, overwhelmed at his sudden confession.
               He pauses at that, smirk falling away as he genuinely considers your words. He’s quiet for a moment, before he smiles again, but this time it’s not as predatory – there’s something oddly soft about it, and it makes you feel worse.
               “Because you’re perfect. That’s all.” He answers like it’s the easiest thing in the world, and before you can say anything he’s clambering on the bed next to you. You want to fight him off, to jump up off the bed and run, but you can’t seem to find the energy to. Besides, you’re not delusional enough to think you could beat Uvogin in any sort of physical altercation or chase. And while he still seemed to be adhering to his promise of not hurting you, you didn’t feel like testing the waters.
               “So I guess the jig’s up. I was hoping you wouldn’t find out, but I can work with this, too. At least now I don’t have to act like I don’t know you. And now, I don’t have to do all that respectful distance shit – you’re mine now, babe, and now I don’t have to hide it.” He’s grinning again, his teeth looking too sharp, and before you can blink he’s above you, your wrists pinned above your head and his lips inches away from yours.
               “So why don’t I show you just how much your attention the last week’s been affecting me?” His voice is low, sultry, and makes you gulp. He presses his face into your neck, deeply inhaling and groaning. “I promise I can make you feel good… I’ll tell you my last rule, okay?”
               You’re frozen, but when he pulls back to glare at you, you shakily mutter out an ‘okay’.
               His grin is wolfish, predatory, scary. “Rule number four is no running away from me, even if that cute little body of yours can’t take anymore. Got it?”
               You nod.
933 notes · View notes
privitivium · 3 months
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Hiiiiii so I'm obsessed with how you write! I was wondering if you could write a sanemi x m bottom reader with overstimulation kink and orgasm denial
sure pal. :3
domtop sanemi shinazugawa x subbot m reader
cw;; overstimulation?? Kinda. orgasm denial.,, anal fingering, toys, slapping, bad dom sanemi,… ahrmhem.. sadist sanemi, ahemrhrm
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in the market, trying to find a stall that sells fruit, fresh fruit. he knows he can get someone to do this for him - buy his food and pet food, but it feels more meaningful to get it himself for his little rhinoceros beetle pal. he has to make sure its top quality, making sure there aren't any brown spots or wilting… humming with scrutiny as he studies an apple.. red.. sweet, perhaps? sweet.. his mind flashes to you. he'd call you, a sweet man, an idiot, a brat.. unknowing of how to deal with his feelings since you make him sick with butterflies.. why is he thinking about him??? hurry, sanemi, pick out some damn fruit…
you're a boisterous guy, you'd say,,, on par with rengoku kyojuro? no, you wouldn't go that far.. but, having unique quirks and a friendly, polite nature;; getting past someone's outer shell of anxiety and nervousness with ease, you'd call yourself a rowdy, energetic guy, not having the charm as others and wondering why exactly sanemi hates you so much if you were so similar to rengoku kyojuro whom he generally likes? you just wanna get along with everyone,, but you can't please everyone. or maybe you can? sanemi hasn't outright told you to fuck off every time you attempt conversation every so often… maybe this counts as being friends on sanemi's terms!
a mere outing as best companions and ubuyashiki's soldiers, wanting to try a new special at a restaurant you frequented with a friend because of course it tastes better with company.. it was a little hard convincing giyuu at first - but he relented, in the end.. obviously taken by your charm. obviously.
animatedly chatting with giyuu and sitting next to each other comfortably in your uniforms, the villagers didn't seem to care about your swords.. received little to no response as he was simply admiring the exterior of the restaurant, relaxing and hanging out.. you'd say this was great progress!! maybe you should invite him out more often? you sigh, relaxed and smiling, turning away and surveying the stalls and villagers before catching sight of white hair.. spiky white hair. of course, first thought is woah, wind pillar sighting?? but it could easily be a villager with spiky white hair… except it isn't -!!
waving merrily to the wind pillar after spotting him amongst the crowds, hand curled around giyuu's forearm to know that he's still there sitting next to you,,
he glares, eyes widened in a very creepy fashion, spotting your obnoxious arm-waving. a-and why is he walking toward you ?? towards you and that smug asshole… it was like his body was on autopilot - until he was standing over you, and you take a quick moment to assess him, noting that he wasn't wearing his usual KILL haori, but rather a plum colored haori… his uniform all the same, chest on display whilst holding a bag of fruit…
you don't comment on his appearance, and quickly greet the wind pillar politely;; “hey, man! what a surprise.. it's nice seeing you here!!” and, doing most of the talking.. explaining what giyuu and yourself were up to - merely hanging around the village as a little break, no missions.. then questioning him, “what are you up to? having a bit of fun around here yourself?" quite awkwardly,,
he promptly ignores and answers with a question of his own. “are you free?” quite.. mildly you'd say,, his tone, that is - “.. no, not at the moment.. but i will be, around sunset?” you narrow your eyes at the wind pillar, scrutinizing him. you just explained what you were doing, and he asks you if you are free…? b-but at the same time, hanging out with the wind pillar you were trying a bit too hard to be friends with??!?!! you decide not to question it.
and so he schedules a spar with you, gruffly.. ignoring giyuu's presence.. how rude, you thought, but it isn't like giyuu is making any move to greet the wind pillar… and when the time comes, after a wonderful time hanging out with giyuu - and managing a smile out of the stoic tomioka giyuu, you're trekking upwards to the wind estate, breathing in deeply and relaxing in the winds that brush against you as you hike up the steps, the sun just an hour away of setting..
receiving no nice greeting and getting straight to work. he was mostly silent, besides the rude quip of being lazy and not hurrying it up as you followed him throughout his estate to the training grounds of his - it was comfortably breezy.. maybe he wouldn't have a problem with you getting half naked to feel the breeze full-force… would that be unprofessional?? questioning sanemi if you could take your clothes off - catching him off guard it seems, but he relents mutely, allowing you to do such a thing, not once looking at you as you stretch, half-naked. hrmn.. this probably gives the other an advantage.. but this isn't serious sparring, is it..? uh.. you'll find out, soon enough.
he makes quick work of subduing you, having grown weak to his harsh hits - your wooden katana on the brink of snapping.. you let yourself fall underneath him, hand over your abdomen as you lay sprawled out; inhaling deeply and trying to control your breathing, unconcerned with the wind pillar standing over you, before taking a seat on you just below your belly. you stare at him, questioningly - never one to be so close to you, but sitting so close to your dick - it arouses a feeling that makes your dick twitch to life. ahem. you hope he doesn't feel it; but judging by the smug expression on his face, he does. you'd peg him to be disgusted by you.. not.. whatever he was now…
sanemi hums, tongue flicking out and running along his bottom lip - you have to look away, feigning tiredness as you lay your cheek against the rocks beneath you - surprisingly cool to the touch, comforting to your heated body… he shifts around, shuffling around before he was leaning over you and guiding your jaw upright to face him - shivering ever so slightly. aha.. god this is not going the way you'd expect. you wanted to have a good time sparring and trying to get to know him, but he wasn't giving you anything to work with.. oh, besides that thing. in his hand. that he pulled out of his pants. uh..
“wanna guess what this is?” he grinned, maliciously it feels like. but that's how he always smiles, no? “uh.. no.. what? what is that?” you squint, trying to get a closer look.. it was a simple ring of sorts… an odd, black trinket, certainly. too big to fit on a finger that is for certain. “ehh, it's pretty easy actually.. why don't you guess? come on, really try..” sanemi hummed, trailing his fingers down your abdomen briefly, fingertips lingering along your happy trail along your navel.. laughing shakily and shuddering under his touch.
he grits his teeth, before parting his lips and holding the ring in his mouth - moving upwards in a partial squat/standing position - undoing his beltㅡyour bulge quite visible. embarrassing. his actions arousing quite the surprising emotionsㅡand he snaps it once, a threat? before he was leaning down and flipping you on your stomach roughly - you yelp, bracing yourself as if to help yourself up before he was kneeling on your back, pressing you into the rocks and tugging your arms back - spluttering in surprise and trying to get free as your boner was promptly being pressed into by the pesky fucking rocks - tying your wrists behind your back before flipping you back over and resuming in his position along your groin. fuck, the small rocks digging into your wrists. they were smooth, but still.. It hurts !
sanemi huffs, lifting his hand to his lips and taking the ring from his teeth - before slowly placing it atop your navel. “you're just... so damn ignorant... stupid little bastard... " he snapped at you, "you really know how to rile me up.. fucking fuck..” he hisses just under his breath as he begins making rough work of undoing your belt, you;; mewling softly in surprise and unable to keep still, writhing underneath him. too surprised, too shocked to speak as you merely stare wide-eyed at the wind pillar sitting over your groin,,- “you're not going to deny me this. i know all your dirty little fucking secrets… you have a little crush on me but you go out with giyuu like that? are you kidding?!” he growled akin to a dog, squatting over you and ripping your uniform pants downward, completely discarded;; your dick springing forward and accompanied by a pearl of pre, tip darkened in comparison due to the flush of arousal.. going to cover yourself, thighs trying to press together - and feeling your wrists press against the rocks underneath you, a reminder that your arms were restricted.. you can't imagine getting a cramp,,, and you feel as though you wouldn't be heard, asking sanemi to take you elsewhere…
“i- i'm sorry, man, jeez..” you try to pacify, try to get him to be a little more gentle.. by no means denying him - yeah, you did like where this was going, but it could be a little softer!!! sanemi ignores you, in his own world and trails his fingers over your abdomen - grasping your cock abruptly and you hiss in surprise, knees jerking,, slowly, the ring he had been flaunting, placed just around the neck of your cock. mewling softly at the stimulation,,
“damn, man.. don't you look pretty..”, a chuckle escaped sanemi's lips as he promptly admires your frame - leering. dripping with sweat and marked with grime here and there, raking his eyes down to your cock and thin happy trail… dick weeping with pre-cum as you babble incoherently, squirming underneath his slightly bigger build, an indescribable feeling - unlike anything you've ever felt before. a vibration along your genitals..,ㅡwhere could you get one of these, for your use?? it was only a matter of time before you were cumming on yourself and partially sanemi.. “you're such a fucking brat. you know that? i-i just can't stress that enough. i thought it was clear that you're mine..” his lips hike up into a mean snarl,, hands gripping the inner of your thighs and sure to leave hand marks, before he was shifting positions in between your bare legs, head tipping downward and breath ghosting over your leaky tip,,
your legs jerk, not exactly trying to shake him off, as a nervous tic.. threatening to close around sanemi's head.. “d-ude no.. no you weren't clear at all..” you manage to choke out, “if i woulda’ known.. i swear..!!” you cry out, hoping that he understands what you're trying to say, pathetically. hoping that he relents and takes fucking pity on you for one secondㅡthe feeling of your lower intestines tightening, knotting as the dull sensation of the little ring continues - and you buck up into the air, tip smearing your slick along sanemi's cheek on accident but holy fuck his lips felt so goodㅡ
“don't do it.” he warns gruffly, and holy fuck he's so scary - staring at your vulnerable with his wide, blank eyes, looking like a shark peeking behind your cock,,; your writhing form beneath him with a vibrating mechanism around the neck of your cock - your hips jerk upwards, head thrown back and hole clenching around nothing repetitively.. vibrating mechanism slick with your cum dribbling from the slitㅡsanemi slaps your thigh harshly after your accident, giving no warningㅡyou shriek in pain, searing pain that makes you tear up,, hitting you along your inner thigh, so close to your upright cock.. so rudeㅡyou didn't mean to, holy fuck.. it just feels so good-!!! “m’ sorry.. m' sorry, i-i'm sorry..” you squirm helplessly, sobbing quietly, thighs tensing to squeeze together after feeling the a draft hit your hole:; your dick threatening to shrink if not for the uncomfortable buzz keeping it stiff and upright,, leaking, dripping down onto your pubes you try to keep trimmed - unable to keep still as you try to jerk your hips upwards,, trying to get the mechanism off. you never touched yourself after cumming - never cumming two times during a session of masturbation, griping to yourself about how it felt too much.. it was too much. it felt almost painful, but still, a considerable amount of pleasurableㅡmaking your legs twitch and hole tense around air continuouslyㅡ
sanemi grunts in displeasure and the vibrating little ring seems to slow down.. god it felt so fucking good just then as if you were about to cum again even with the overstimulation along your cock - and he just t-took it away,,, tears stream down to your ears;; shaking your head and parting your partially dry lips to apologize - “you fucking moron.. don't know when to fucking listen.” he snapped lowly before he was standing up and - his pants disappear. his dick… just a smidge bigger than yours… standing outright, and it seems that the carpet does match the drapes.. neatly trimmed. Ahemhrm.. he inches down, squatting - and using his pants as a cushion for his knees and bunching up your pants underneath your ass as a cushion for you… you revel in this moment of sweetness… biting your lip, swallowing the spit in your mouth, and blinking the tears away… unwilling to gaze at him,,. you fear though that will make you cum again,,, realistically, it wouldn't, but you’re still nervous,,,
sanemi swipes his thumb on his tip, thumb slick with his mess.. unable to contain himself after seeing you so pretty - circling it with his thumb slick with his pre, before switching fingers and pressing inward.. it was relatively easy… a little too easy… as if you were a little familiar with fingering yourself,,,, “huh.” he mutters, his dick aching to be properly touched as he fingers you lazily - you jerk, squeezing around him with a soft cry.. “hmm,..” he continues, as if skeptical, as he slowly scissors around, trying to find that magic mystical button to make you squirm again - and with ease, you begin to writhe, push into his hand.. “ah, there we go…” he nods, prideful as he begins rubbing, furiously against your prostate with the pad of his middle finger - hand snapping to grip your cock and thumb placed over the slit of your tip.. “a-uah,, sa-sanemi.. sa.. nemi-!” you weakly cry out his name. Over and over.. while clenching on his fingers and grinding downward into his touch.. he could get used to this.. maybe have you around his house as his little fuckdoll to stuff and toy with whenever he wanted.. ah, he reprimands himselfㅡyou're more than that to him.. his.. husband?.. his lover..? … his.
sanemi stretches, and scissors your hole dutifully - humming in contentment as he uses your cum to lather his cock,, the mere feeling of his fingertips grazing your dick almost.. almost.. makes you start back up again - crying out softly at his touch along your shaft.. before he inches forward, guiding his tip to your head before pushing inward, kindly being slow… the tip of his cock making it passed your previously stretched ring of muscle,,, you inhale shakily, bracing yourself yet trying to relax - sanemi, snapping his hips forward into you. piercing you, fucking filling you to the brim and making you choke on your spit - drool dribbling down your cheek and rendering you speechless - lips parted with glazed eyes..
“i'm gonna make you wish that you didn't cum..” gently, he trails the back of his hand over your cheek, wiping away your tears… uahgh… his hand gently wrapping around the base of your cock and slowly stroking it, as he slowly pushes inward until his pubes were buried in your perineum, filling your hole out nicely.. “... if you cum again… i'm gonna rip your dick off, alright?” sanemi hums affectionately, thumbing the slit of your cock as if plugging it up once more - you writhe, ultimately trying to relax; breathing heavily.. chest heaving up and down as you stare into the sky, the sunset overcoming the perfect blue with oranges and yellows - augh.. fuck..,, sanemi, gently fucking into you compared to when you first began, yet you can't cum? - tears welled up in your eyes, and you feel so honored despite the rule... this must mean you're friends now… o-or more, as sanemi alluded to.. what exactly did being sanemi's entail?... being lovers..? y-yeah, you'll go with that.. just.. don't.. think about … cumming all over his hand… all- all over his face.. D-DONT THINK-!
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sorry for any mistakes ,,, :3
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dewdropdinosaur · 2 months
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Falling for You
VOX x READER
Summary: You are Vox's assistant and maybe tripping isn't so bad in the work place.
Warnings: None. Just Vox being egotistical(I tried to keep it canon but I am sorry if it's not exactly) and lots of pining.
Keep in mind that REQUESTS are OPEN!!
Vox stepped out of a black limo and stood up, revealing his seven foot figure as a crowd of demons rushed over to either take pictures, ask questions, or get an autograph…which he had completely ignored all their attempts to try with a disgusted look on his face. Stepping out of the limo along with him, clutching your pen-pad you strode beside him as he walked into the large VoxTech building. 
You knew he had secretly enjoyed the attention he was getting very much from the crowd. It made him feel powerful. You swore you could have seen him flash a light blue toothy grin at times.
“Sir, Zestial, your 3 o’clock is waiting in the 10th floor lounge to discuss recent sales and advertisements on 666. And your 4 o’clock canceled so your 6 pm is now moved to that slot. Valentino wants you to visit his studio apparently he is pissed and oh Velvette is having none of it—”
“Relax darling, I’ve got it handled.” Vox smirked down at you, cupping your chin in his hand in dominance. You breathe out a heavy sigh once he removes his hand, hiding a small blush that graces your cheeks hoping he didn’t notice. He does though, always has. The way your eyes light up when you look at him, the small tint of color that reaches your nose when he compliments you, he sees it all. And he loves it. 
Entering the elevator, you press the button for the 10th floor; relaxing as the metal doors close shut and you are away from the loud crowd. It continued like this for the rest of the day. Meetings, interviews, coffee break(that was more like a coffee second than the actual 30 minute lunch session), writing reports, adding to Vox’s calendar, writing more reports, making sure Valentino doesn’t blow up another employee…and so on and so forth. 15 hour days were now your specialty after working with Vox for so many years and yet some days still drug on longer than one would have appreciated. 
Sitting at your desk outside Vox’s office, the small light of the lamp illuminated the darkened area. You rub your eyes in exhaustion, peeking at the monitor to see it read ‘1:26 AM’. Deciding that five hours of sleep was better than none, you switch off your monitor and stack your paper reports neatly on your desk for later that day. Flicking off the lamp, you knock softly on Vox’s office door and allow yourself in. 
“Sir, I just finished up. I’ll see you at 7 AM.”
“Mhmm, another late night?”
“Could say the same for yourself boss.”
“Y/N, it’s past work hours. You know how I hate paying your overtime.” 
“And yet, without fail, I see that nifty little add on each week.”
“Well, you are one of the few competent assholes in this place”
“Was that a compliment sir?” 
“Don’t push your luck darling.”
Vox turns his chair around to face you, a large cup of coffee steaming in his hand as he sips it with a smirk. Crossing your arms with the chuckle, you liked this banter. You and Vox had always had a good working relationship, sassing each other back and forth while still toeing the line between professionalism and flirting. Taking a step forward, you stop right in front of his desk.
“You know me Vox, I am always pushing the envelope. So, was it a compliment?”
“Ah yes, always so pushy. Really shouldn’t be a quality you brag about.”
“But it’s why you like me~. The pushing, always getting what I want to know.”
“I will neither confirm nor deny the fact that you may have more tact than most in this shithole.” 
Biting back a laugh at his playful attempt at professional language ruined by the vulgarity, you place a hip on the desk; sitting casually. The large aquarium was a nice backdrop and you could see why Vox spent a lot of time here. Other than working himself to the bone to maintain his image/the company or hunting down the Radio Demon on any available CV camera, looking into the aquarium was a nice activity you assumed he might partake in. 
“Something on your mind Y/N?” 
Snapping your head back to his and reality, you offer a sheepish smile and a shake of your head. 
“No, no. Just admiring the aquarium.”
“It is pretty nice, I built it myself. Should have seen it, it didn't take more than a week.”
“Truly humble boss, truly humble.” 
“Now is that any way to speak to your employer?”
“My apologies. I didn't realize stroking your ego was in my job responsibilities.” 
Standing up from the desk, you accidentally catch your foot on the wires underneath. Bracing for the impact, it doesn’t come. Instead, you are caught as a small yelp leaves your mouth. Looking up, Vox has caught you with one hand; holding you in a dip. The world freezes for a few seconds as you take a moment to look at his face, the feeling of his hands on your hips, it all felt…right for some reason. 
Clearing his throat, Vox pulls you up and removes his hand. You could have sworn you saw a small flush on his screened face before he spoke. 
“Tch, women. Always falling for me.”
“Again…really humble boss.”
Heat still crept onto your cheeks as you long for the feeling of his hands on your waist, how warm they felt, how safe it made you feel. Adjusting your blouse, you excuse yourself and walk home; mind running with all the possibilities and recounting every second of the encounter. 
Little did you know, Vox was doing the very same. Replaying the event on his monitors, reviewing every second and every flush of your skin. The way your eyes widened and looked up at him with such hope, it made his circuits buzz a little. He wouldn’t deny it, he had always found you attractive. Definitely helped in meetings with other Overlords to have a pretty face moderating. But he would be wrong to say that was the only reason. You were hardworking, almost as driven as him and that is saying something. You flowed effortlessly around the office, directing everything to its natural and needed space. And the way you smiled for the camera, gosh he wished you would smile at him like that. That pretty pearly white smile. 
Looks like this might not be the professional relationship it had started out to be. Neither of you wanted to keep it professional anyway. 
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ridestomars · 9 months
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GIRL U WANT – S. HARRINGTON
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𖥻 summary: steve harrington is in love with his coworker, y/n, and max mayfield can't stand how annoying a lovesick steve is.  𖥻 pairing: steve harrington x fem!reader 𖥻 warnings: y/n is used!! it's kinda told from max's point of view. idiots in love (obv), max and steve have a little sister-older brother relationship. bad grammar ig. not proofread (yk the deal). 3k-ish words.
💭 liv's thoughts: look at me rewriting my wip list works. this is another one that has been sitting on my docs page for ages, and i finally got the courage to fulfill it. i hope you guys like it! 
DO NOT INTERACT WITH THIS WORK IF YOU'RE UNDER SIXTEEN.
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“Look at you with your mouth watering, look at you with your mind spinnin'. Why don't we just admit it's all over? She's just the girl you want”. 
People say patience is a virtue, but Maxine Mayfield begs to differ. 
She doesn't believe in that "good things come for those who wait" crap, because nothing nice ever came her way for just standing there until something happened. The only thing she got from waiting around was a terrible yearning sensation of what could have been if she wasn't such a wimp. That is why Max doesn't exercise the righteous quality of patience, preferring her natural impulsiveness instead. Her restlessness is just too precious not to be used – Seventeen magazine insists on telling her that it's just a thing Aries girls do. 
Her effort usually pays off, but when it doesn't, there is nothing better than a "fuck you" to tend the wounds. Rejection is always a possibility, but being disappointed because of it isn't, and with time, you learn how to deal with the negative responses… despite that, Max likes to consider herself too persuasive to ever be declined.
But she has to admit that her intrinsic sense of fearlessness can make her a little insensitive when it comes to people's fear of rejection because, to her, it's just all so simple. Though she tries to be understanding, others' stupidity can become a bit too much for her to handle, and she almost always finds herself on the verge of scolding them for their inability to be bold. It was like when she first started dating Lucas: she had a very serious talk with him about his embarrassment to complain about his wrong orders to the servers because he fears being met with a rude attitude – she still walks up to the workers to point out that his order came with pickles when he didn't want any, but just because it's him. 
For some time now, Max found herself in an annoying situation. Over her boring vacation evenings, she began visiting Family Video a lot, and began picking up on something that grew to be infuriating: Steve's and Y/N's constant bullshit. Their (initial) quiet pining was cute, at first, because it made her feel like she was watching a real-life rom-com, with an exciting "will they or won't they?" plot line… reminiscent of the late-nights where she would pretend to be asleep on the living room couch to catch the new Cheers episode, to see if Diane and Sam would finally get together. Yet, as the days passed and their never-ending coyness appeared to only grow stronger, her hopes started to falter. In fact, the situation began to get so obvious that it started to get on her nerves. Big time.
She was an observer, and easily noticed the lingering looks as they talked, one getting distracted by the other's lips, or the way their brows furrowed when attempting to flirt. Or the jealous blush that dusted over Steve's cheeks whenever he saw you talking to a good-looking customer. And then, whenever you weren't at work, she hears his grumpy huffs that turn into infatuated sighs as soon as you walk through the door, apologizing for being late. It wasn't hard to miss your affectionate words about him when he wasn't around, as if talking about your co-worker would make his absence more tolerable. 
What was sweet, quickly turned into tiresome when the instances of you two almost kissing turn into a daily thing. She can't count the times when she caught Steve leaning his face closer to yours, taking the courage to make his move, but right at the last second… the plan totally backfires. You either bump heads (Max physically cringes whenever she remembers the scene) or too distracted, ended up turning away from the other. Either option brought a burning ache to the chest. 
The blatant crush you have on each other followed Max everywhere she goes as if she was doomed to hear about it until the end of times. Steve was never necessarily reserved about his infatuation – although it seemed like everyone knew about it, except the one person that should –, and since he gives her rides everywhere, she found herself listening to him babble about the gorgeous gleam in your eyes and your shiny hair. The guy sees you as something sacred, and yet… he never admits that he actually likes you, despite the fact that you are all he ever talks about. 
To him, you are a piece of heaven on Earth, the person who understands him the most and makes him feel good about himself, among other incredibly elaborate platonic compliments.
Max knows Steve is pretty much the most idiotic guy to ever exist, but he isn't stupid. It's obvious that he just doesn't want to admit his feelings because, if he does, he will have to do something about it, and being blind to the fact that you feel the same, he doesn't want to risk it. If things went wrong, his heart wouldn't be able to take it. 
The only question roaming Max's head is: he is secure, but at what price? 
It all makes days like today even more unbearable. 
They have been sitting inside Steve's burgundy BMW for almost five minutes now, with the clear window closed, the A/C turned up to maximum speed, and Madonna's 'True Blue' playing on the radio. After their arrival at Family Video's parking lot, Max had asked for a minute, just one fucking minute, to fix her shoelaces and Steve used it as an opportunity to daydream as he stared out the windshield. His eyes were set ahead, and she didn't need to look to know who he was staring at. 
This was starting to get depressing. 
"Steve," Max calls, as harsh as ever. "Stop". 
As if he had just been electrocuted, Steve turns his head to stare at the fifteen-year-old. Eyebrows furrowed and nostrils flared, he defends himself, "But I'm not doing anything". 
"Exactly, you moron," she grumbles. "You gotta tell her". 
'No more sadness, I kiss it goodbye. The sun is burs-', Max interrupts Madonna by turning off the radio, stopping any possible distractions.
It's clear that Steve doesn't like where this is going, because his face contorts into that sour annoyed look that makes her take a deep breath. This is going to be difficult.
"Tell what to who?" pretending to be clueless, he purses his lips, but his eyes don't lie, quickly drifting back to Y/N's figure. There was no escape now, not with Max's sharp gaze bearing down on him.
"You're so full of shit".
"Hey! Language, Maxine," he reprimands, "I honestly don't know what you're talking about". 
"You're in love with her," she motions to his co-worker who was still blissfully unaware of the car parked outside. 
And her words rang as an absurdity to him.  
"Max, for the love of-," his protest is interrupted by the girl and the know-it-all tone he hates so much.
"Steve, you're so into her it's ridiculous," her blue eyes narrow at him, hardening her expression. He scoffs, crossing his arms as he looks in the other direction, trying not to give too much away.
They stay like that for a few seconds, with him staring out the window, refusing to take part in the discussion, and Max glaring at his blushing, conflicted face. 
But then, he breaks. 
"Fine," Steve breathes out, "I mean, I'd make out with her… like, platonically, you know?"
The word comes out as if he had just remembered it existed, and Max doesn't buy it for a second, "You can't make out with someone platonically, Steve".
He takes her harsh delivery with a contemplating face, letting it all sink in. It wasn't groundbreaking, but it did break his argument, and he finds himself agreeing with what she had said… and he gets a grip. 
"Why am I listening to a thirteen-year-old?" he mutters, in disbelief. Huffing, Steve turns back at her, already gripping the door handle, "You know what, smarty-pants? I gotta work".
"I'm fifteen, Harrington! And we're not done!"
Max trails behind him as he gets out of the car in a hurry, stepping heavily into the pavement. As Steve bursts through the glass door with the girl in tow, they catch the attention of everyone inside Family Video. He gives you and Robin an embarrassed smile, stepping onto a random aisle, trying to hide from the curious stares. 
From the corner of his eye, Steve realizes that he still hasn't gotten rid of the stubborn girl, so he gathers the cluttered tapes and organizes them, in a failed attempt to avoid Max's inquisitive look. Moving the Pretty in Pink tapes around, the redhead crosses her arms, still staring. 
"You should learn a thing or two about that movie, you know?" she says with a quiet voice.
"What are you talking about, Mayfield?" he asks with a defeated sigh, clearly getting annoyed by her.
"Duckie didn't do anything about his crush on Andie, and had to settle for being her best friend in the end," she spells it out for him, "While she got to make out with Andrew McCarthy. Arguably more good-looking and charming than Jon Cryer". 
Steve rolls his eyes, but the situation does ring out an alarm at the back of his mind. What if… no, let's not go there. "What are you trying to say, wise-ass?"
"I'm saying," she continues, not willing to let him take a breath, "Are you truly willing to miss your shot? Stop being such a coward and go for it!".
"You talk as if I actually have a chance".
There it is. 
This was what she wanted to hear. 
"Steve, the girl is almost putting up a bright sign saying 'Go for it! Ask me out, you idiot!'". 
Drifting his eyes away from the tapes he was organizing, Steve watches as you laugh at something Robin had said. His gaze softens as he contemplates the scene, his hesitancy quavering every time the sound of your laughter reached his ears. This time, seeing the longing look in his eyes made a gentle, sympathetic feeling grow inside Max's chest, so different than the impatient annoyance she was so used to. 
"Look, Steve," her green eyes droop with friendly warmth. Though she might say that this is such a rare sight, that is what he sees every day when he talks to her. "I'm just saying what I noticed, and even if I'm wrong, which I'm not, by the way, you gotta take this off your chest. This is your chance!".
Staring down at her, he can only blink. Her encouraging words are settling in his mind, screeching as they do so, and he wonders… the gears inside his head spinning out of control, smoking everything so bad he almost can't see anything. Steve feels a bit out of breath.
But, impatient as always, Max keeps going as if she hasn't just collapsed all of his plans to stay in your friendship's comfort zone. With the wisdom that few possess, she continues, "I know you're still hung up on your Nancy-heartbreak and everything, but you're standing in your own way on this one, Steve. I can't tell you what the future holds, but I'm sure that you'll feel a lot better after you tell her about it". 
His intentions to continue ignoring it all are crumbling to dust inside him right now and her words make him feel defenseless, too vulnerable to continue disregarding his own fear of possible rejection. 
"That doesn't make sense," he scoffs, though his voice is soft and quiet, "Why would I want to do something like that if I don't know what the outcome is? She might just turn me down, and I don't think I could…"
Eyes drifting back to your breathtaking figure behind the counter, he stops himself before finishing the sentence. His face lit up with an astonishing expression of realization. Steve lets out another defeated sigh… maybe Max was right. 
With a knowing smile, she tells him, "Because you know she's worth it". 
xxx
Steve has had his head in the clouds ever since his little chat with Max earlier and could barely concentrate on having any work done throughout the rest of his shift. It didn't help that he also couldn't escape the sight of you from any corner of Family Video, and had to take several breaks until closing hours to avoid his head from exploding. 
Pacing back and forth inside the employee's break room instead of helping you put everything away (not exactly the top priority on his list right now), Steve tries to muster up even the slightest string of courage to talk to you about his feelings.
Now, on top of being an absolute wimp, he can also add useless when thinking to his list. 
He takes a big breath as he replays what Max had said, and almost unconsciously, snippets of Billy Joel's 'Tell Her About It' start echoing with it. The combination was able to help him make an outline of everything he'd like to say to you. 
"I like you. I don't want the chance to slip away. It's okay if you don't feel the same. I just wanted to say something before it's too late", he mutters to himself, still walking in circles. "If yes, then, ba-ba-bam, charm her up. If heartbreak, retreat. I'll be fine. Fine. Just fine. A-okay". 
Steve feels the same rush as he felt before going to his High School basketball matches, and he can only hope that the results will be far more positive. He takes another deep breath, shaking his arms before he walks over to the door. His fingers touch the door handle, cool under his fingertips. This is his chance. The store was closing, there were no customers around, and Robin had left early for band practice. 
Let's do it, he thinks to himself.
Determined and possessed by a sense of overconfidence, Steve snaps the door open, letting it hit the wall with a loud noise. The sudden movement turns your attention on him, and he can feel his cheeks burning bright under your gaze, his faux bravado trembling below the warmth of your eyes. The quizzical look you gave made him question his own ability for the dramatics. 
"It, uh, got stuck", he offers an embarrassed smile.
Good. Already starting with a lie.
"Yeah," your expression turns into amusement, "it gets jammed all the time". 
The kindness in your voice makes him feel a little better about himself, maybe he wasn't being such a fool in front of you. His heart started to thump inside his chest, blood pumping in his ears like thunder as he walked closer to where you stood, just behind the big counter. With an intense gaze set on your face, he watched as your eyebrows furrow in his direction again. 
"Is there something on my face?" you lift your hand up to your cheek, wiping it off in a hurry.
"No! It's just-," he interrupts himself, suddenly realizing that this script wasn't supposed to go this way. What is he meant to say now? Under your expectant gaze, it's not like he can think of anything intelligible. "It's not that". 
"Oh, okay," breathing out, seeming relieved by the information, you bring your hand down. With a voice that dripped with curiosity, you ask, "Why we-were you staring, then?"
Steve feels so stupid now that he can only blink down at you, his head getting fuzzy by that cute look in your eyes and the way your lips quirked up, stifling a smile. Yeah, he's a goner.
Before he could actually think about what he was saying, he hears the sound of his voice echoing through the empty video rental store, "I don't wanna be a Duckie". 
"What are you talking about?" you laugh out loud, though it's clear that you're not laughing at him. His words took you both by surprise, and he couldn't expect any other reaction. 
"Sorry," Steve apologizes, chuckling along, "I didn't mean to say that. What I wanted to say was… well, by the look on your face I think you already know". 
Again, he just blurted it out without reflecting on it first. But it was justified. 
For the first time, he saw something different in the way you looked up at him. Maybe it was just him being impacted by Max's words, but Steve swears that he has never seen that mellow tenderness gleaming in the color of your eyes before… or at least, he had never noticed it like this. He feels like an even bigger idiot now for not realizing it sooner. 
"Know what?" your question comes as a sign of your unawareness of his new understanding, and it makes a sweet smile grow on his face.
"I like you". 
The three words come out in a far more relaxed way than he had originally imagined his confession to be. Clearly, his realization made a wave of true confidence wash over his body, putting him back in his element of ease. And to say it out loud was a relief like no other.
But when he was met with no answer, just that shocked look on your face, his smile faltered.
"It's alright if you don't feel the same," he reassures, "I just… I didn't want to keep waiting around, wasting more opportunities by never telling you how I feel, because if you feel the same, I really don't want you to get away just like that. And uh- I don't want to be just your friend, but it's fine if you-"
"I like you too", you talk a bit louder than him, interrupting his train of thought, without any remorse. "I, uh- never said anything because I thought you didn't like me back". 
He is still, like a statue in front of you, processing the information. 
And it seems like an eternity before he cups your face, the palms of his hands resting warmly over your cheeks. His long fingers graze against your temples, and just the feeling is enough to ease your hammering heart, but as he leans closer to your face, you can feel your own breath ricocheting against his lips.
Steve stares at you through half-lidded eyes, as if he is waiting for your go-ahead. And it's only when you softly nod up at him that he presses his mouth against yours, letting his lips wrap around your bottom lip in a soft, loving peck. His mind was misty with increasing thoughts of you, your candy-flavored lips, and the smooth texture of your cheeks, along with the feel of the roots of your hair on his fingertips. You were breathing in each other in your kiss, and your breath came faltering against the other cheek. It was truly world-shattering, something you had never felt before in your life. 
As you slowly, and almost reluctantly so, pull apart, Steve feels a small chuckle bubbling up in his throat. Seeing your amused expression, he smiles. 
"We have so much time to make up for". 
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