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#At the time I didnt want to write it myself but hey I just might
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I have a few bunker ideas that have to do with the archives. There's so many potential things to go wrong in there. Possibly going to just make that a series of its own.
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opens-up-4-nobody · 10 months
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#sometimes u just gotta have a cringe fail weekend. is what i tell myself bc i let the fact that i forgot to check my new#email completely obliterate me. also i haven't been sleeping enough. also just the normal thoughts in my head#by which i mean the part of my brain that demands consequences for inattention by means of suffering. devine punishment.#which is irrational and annoying but knowing that doesnt seem to help. so ive just been laying here in the hopes i come unspooled and start#to disintegrate. which is annoying bc ive got stuff to do#specifically bc i am supposed to b a TA this semester. which is what i figured but also feared#so. thats gonna b a lot. tho not as much as my old school bc they dont make TAs do literally everything here apparently#but. itll b a lot. and also i have to finish signing up for classes. bc i didnt do that back in April by my brain was melting. also i have#to keep doing my job and dealing with my data. ugh. well. being a TA isnt so bad. i do like to help ppl learn even if im not very good at it#like. i struggle with thr talking to ppl part. like the transition of ny thoughts to something thst makes sense#oh well. hope i end up teaching something im not too unqualified for. i could do soils. Ecology. uhhh. maybe intro bio but i never even took#university level biology. i just skipped upper level courses. that's probably it. anything else would b a lotta faking it#ugh. im tired. i should go to sleep at 9pm. thr sun hasbt even set and i should sleep#tomorrow i have to get my shit together. but also i wanna email my new professor like hey bro like what do u want me to do???#like how do i start in this lab? when do we start talking. like just not to b pushy but whats thr procedure?#i like Structure but also its like weeks until the semester starts so we got time. im just a lil nuts#jesus. its gonna b an interesting semester. hopefully fun but uh it is sorta like taking a boat out when u can see big ominous clouds#like im sure ill b fine but also i might get dumped over into a watery grave. i just. i have a lot of papers to write#and its gonna b hard to b a student on top of that. partly bc what im gonna b doing now is almost completely unrelated#which is probably y ppl stick to the same track they stsrt on. that awkward moment when ppl ask u if ur gonna keep working with bi0crust#and ur like uhhhh no fuck that actually the work ive done in the past 4 years makes me hate myself✌️#so we r back at square 1. well not 1 bc its sorta related but its a pretty big reset#itll b fine once things start. its just thr anticipation that kills me#unrelated
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lixern · 6 months
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; xx. wriothesley x gn!reader , modern au
imagine being in a mall youve never gone to before with your friends, so they know the place and you dont. they give you locations but you just cant memorize them all! you tell your friends youre going to the restroom, and they tell you directions to the restaurant theyre going to so you agree to meet up with them there. well.. when you step out- wait, what was the restaurant's name again?
you ponder for awhile, what is it? but then suddenly forget the directions they gave you. god, you just have to wing it.
well, wing it you didnt! you got lost, and didnt see any of your friends in the restaurants you walked pass. you look around for reliable looking people to ask, and there you see a man with black hair with a few gray streaks, with supeeeeerrrr light blue cute eyes! a few piercings and a wolfish appearance to him. you walk up to him and..
tap tap "hey.. uhm- do you know how to get to.." you say, embarassed. you literally just forgot the name!
aha! nevermind that, you just remembered!
"*******. ya, the restaurant? thats the one i think!"
you look like a lost dog!! infront of the most sculpted man youve ever seen aswell... hes so cute, you shouldve asked someone else for directions or your nose probably wouldve bled infront of him if you didnt keep your composture. especially infront of his friends! they looked so attractive too. long, white hair with blue streaks and a dark purplish blue type of hair color? god, youre surprised how such good looking people exist.
he turns to look at you the second you tap him, and now you realize just how tall he is the way he stares down at you!
"Well sure, but the buildings preeeettty big so you want me to escort you?"
wow.. his voice was super hot too. well- wait! nows not the time to dream!!!
you look at him and nod, too stunned at his appearance to speak. you watch him talk to his friends, hearing them but not listening. he then pats your shoulder, signalling your leave. huh.. maybe youll ask his number later.
you walk with him, a bit flustered at how tall he towers over you. should you engage in conversation, should you stay quiet? how do you avoid embarassing yourself infront of a gods creation?!?!
"so, whats your name?"
the man asks in the middle of your pondering, well atleast you dont have to think about that anymore. so.. you give him your name and ask his!
"well, it's [name]. how bout you?"
you sound pretty cool, but inside you arent!! he sounds so pretty, hes indeed a pretty boy..
"wriothesley." he says with a gentle smile, looking down at you with bright eyes. he seems fond of you, but you dont know that!
"rio- rizzley? wosley??" you try to pronounce the name, failing ultimately.
"wrio, for short." he chuckles, patting you on the back. whats up with all the physical affection its driving you mad!!!!!
you laugh slightly, smiling a bit too sweetly for your first interaction and, he notices. but he doesnt wanna scare you away.. youre just so cute!
you talk and talk with him, and hes the same level of talkative as you are! finally, someone who actually responds to your yapping! you just wish he could be your boyfriend right now.. waitwait. you guys just met no way!
its been about 5 or more minutes you guess, then you see him pull out a white card on his bag and write something on it with a pen. he puts the pen back and shoves the card into his pocket. you then speak up, pointing at a restaurant and asking him if its that one. he says yes, nodding as he does so.
"i can go there by myself now, thanks for the help wrio!"
but no, he disagrees.
"nah, i think ill just bring you there. you might get lost even if its just right there."
he smirks, mischievously at that. but.. its kinda cute not gonna lie. so you just nod and walk with him. his hand slides across your side, your hand then the bag you carry, it drives you insane how close you are!
you finally get there, smiling up at him. admiring his pretty face one more time before having to let the sight go.
"thank you really, for the help- I hope it wasnt a distraction to you and your friends hangout or something..."
a light red tint dusts over his cheeks, as he says a polite "your welcome" before walking away. you first fix your composture before entering, but then suddenly.. wait! you forgot to grab his number!!!
"wrio!" you scream, but hes too far to hear you so you just weep internally in vain, before entering the restaurant.
your friends scold you, its been like 20 minutes since they were there! little do they know you got a bit lost.. you sit down beside them, before noticing the pocket in the bag you carried had a little white card peeking out of it...
on the back of the card in the clearest space there is, you read..
i know its just a business card im sorry aha, pretty shit way to tell you my number yeah? but its all i have right now.
maybe you dont have to say goodbye to his pretty face after all.
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chrissturnsgirlll222 · 3 months
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second, never first
part one | part two | part three | part four
chris x fem!reader
summary - you grew up hating one guy all of high school but suddenly become close friends, but as time goes on feelings develop, only its one sided.
warnings - underage drinking, throwing up, use of y/n, BOYS (no smut… for now lol and yes i am 18) currently not proofread or written with pristine punctuation
word count - 2500+?? (i know its long but i had a bunch of ideas for the beginning)
this is also my first story so pls be kind :) also just wanted to mention that i wouldn’t have the courage to write and post if it werent for other writers on this app so i would just like to tag and thank a few accounts who inspired me to write<3
@lovingmattysposts @flowerxbunnie @strniohoeee @lacysturniolo @strawberrysturniolo @flynnriderishot @stuniolobbg 
~
for as long as i could remember, being the second option was all i knew. just always being the backup, never the go to.
this constant course of events led to my passion of reading and writing, pretty much consuming myself with content or sources that provided me with a sense of belonging, or just putting myself into a different reality.
i always had been drawn to romance. its a un-comforting comfort for me, if that makes sense. i love reading about it and watching movies about it but love just seemed so out of reach. im sure many people feel this way but i just believe there are certain people in the world that just go through life without any sort of romantic experiences. now while that may be true i also think thats just something i made up in my head to comfort myself from the fact that i have never had a single romantic experience, ever. i mean im 17 years old and havent even had my first kiss. hell i havent even held hands with a boy.
that of course all changed during my senior year.
-
“oh my god look at what cody sent me” anna says.
anna is my best friend, though at times she felt like my biggest competition. she is everything im not. constantly talking to boys, what people consider ‘boy pretty’, very out going and popular. the fun one.
i look over at her phone to see a text from one of the many boys shes talked to in the past year “i thought you guys were done?” i say
“yeah were not talking like that anymore but i still talk to him here and there” she says
“i dont know if thats the best idea, i mean if you guys keep talking hes probably going to get the wrong impression”
“your such a buzz kill sometimes” she says slightly annoyed. i stay silent. I might sound like a complete bitch here but when your friend is constantly talking or complaining about guy, a, b and c you eventually get bored and exhausted of hearing about it, I try my hardest to be understanding when she brings up guys, but I’m apparently never supportive enough to her standards. I suppose she wants me to be there and give her advice but what do I have to offer to that conversation?
we were driving through the school parking lot to park in our usual spot next to chris.
chris is, well complicated. ive known him since 7th grade and hated him up until about 3 months ago when senior year started. the friendship started off with him just parking next to my car everyday and him just pestering me all the time but the longer we kept parking together, the more we grew to enjoy our casual conversations.
we both roll down our windows.
“morning” i say waving at him, anna does the same “hey, i wanna skip first block if you guys are down” he says “you know i would never say to to that” anna says “ehh i dont know about today i have a bio project i need to work on and didnt getting the planning sheet so i should probably head in” i say
“alright, anna come on i wanna get mcdonalds” chris says tapping on his passenger seat.
“looks like its just us this morning! y/n me and chris can just go get food and ill bring you back something for lunch” anna says turning to me.
“ill see you guys at lunch” i say grabbing my bag and locking my car doors as anna gets in to chris’ car and they drive off.
if you havent caught the weird passive tone from anna, thats how she was. no matter how much i tried she always had to be the centre of attention . i honestly dont even think she does it on purpose. i love her and she is my best friend but i just find her insufferable at times, its just who she is. chris is a great friend to me but i always caught the vibe that chris liked anna or at least thought she was hot. which is also why i think he treats her with more respect than me.
now when i said we grew to like eachother i left out a slight detail.
even though i hated chris for most of high school for the way he treated me and constantly teased me, i couldnt help myself from starring at him from time to time as he talked or even looking at his hands. not only was he visually pleasing he could be really sweet and the conversations we shared were really meaningful at times. was he attractive, yes. was he a complete asshole to me for years and still hasnt apologized, yes. did i completely fall head over heels for him when he began to show me his nice side, sadly yes.
its so cliche but i fell for my “bully” so to speak. i hated myself for it but what i hated even more was how much i let my feelings for him effect how i saw myself even more as the second option. if it came down to it and me anna and him were the only people in the world he would still fuck anna before he even though about kissing me.
i know that i might only feel this way towards him simply because hes the only male thats shown me any attention at all. though it hasnt always been positive or romantic it was still something that i had never experienced from a male before.
like i said, second option.
-
i finish up my final class and head out to my car and wait for anna who is doing god knows what considering i drive her home everyday after school. while waiting for anna, chris gets into his car and starts it to heat up as it is the beginning of winter. i watch what hes doing through his car window as he scrolls on his phone for a sec and then storms into the backseat of my car, always the backseat.
my head whips around to look at him and he looks annoyed. “why do you look mad” i say. “look at what this bitch said to me” he says leaning up to the middle console shoving his phone in my face and i read texts from a girl hes talking to.
friday 3:14pm
alice: chris i cant keep talking to you
chris: what do you mean
alice: i mean that i cant keep talking to you what were doing is messing with my head and i dont want to be a victim of one of your fuck and dumps
chris: im sure i have many other girls who would kill to be in your position
alice: then go have them i dont want to be apart of your sick and twisted hookups
“ok wow” i say my eyes wide “i didnt even know you were talking to alice”
“well now you do, and im not anymore apparently” he says throwing his arms up as he sinks in to the middle seat. “we have been fucking since the halloween party, remember when i kissed her infront of you?” he says in a duh tone.
ah yes halloween. the night i went home crying after said kiss was shared infront of my face.
“yes i remember” i say blankly.
“we were supposed to hangout tonight but she decided to blow me off, i was ready to get my dick wet but i guess ill just have to be fucking boring alone” he says as i make a disgusted face.
“well i dont know what to te-“ i was cut off by anna coming into the car.
“ok sorry i took so long but i was just getting the details for a party tonight!” she says out of breath. chris sits up at the news, “maybe i will get my dick wet then.” he says smirking and jokingly raising his eyebrows.
“what? alice blew you off already.” anna says turning to chris. i dont bother questioning why anna knew and i didnt because im sure i know answer.
“yep and im scoring tonight.” he says fake punching the air as me and anna giggle.
-
anna and i finished getting ready at her place, her wearing jeans and a hot pink tank top and me in black jeans and a white long sleeve crop top. i stare at myself in the mirror when i hear annas phone go off with a text from chris.
friday 10:27pm
chris: here
“anna! chris is here!” i yell grabbing my phone and my drinks for the night from my bag and start making my way downstairs as i hear her close behind me. i tie up my shoes as i hear her grab her drinks from her fridge and say bye her parents. i wave goodbye to her parents as well and we make our way out to chris’ car.
upon entering were greeted by matt, chris’ brother in the passenger seat.
“hey matt i didnt know you were coming out tonight!” i say smiling at him as loud music blasts from chris’ speakers.
“yeah nicks also going so i just tagged along, plus i need to drive you guys home since chris is drinking tonight.” he says lightly punching chris in the arm. “oh yeah, speaking of nick where is he?” i say. “nicks already there he came with his friends.” i nod in response and sit back starting to chug down one of my drinks. i may be a buzz kill in annas eyes but i knew how to party and loved drinking with my friends.
matt is chris’ triplet brother along with nick. i never really got to know his brothers all that well, i just know that matt has become a lot more comfortable around me and anna as we have started to spend more time with chris.
once we arrive to the party me and anna walk around to see whos there and we meet up with some of our other friends. i can see chris from across the room laughing and talking to nick and matt.
the night goes on and i finish my fourth cooler of the night and head out to the car to grab another. when i step outside the cool air hits me and i instantly regret the 2 shots of tequila i had on top of the fruity coolers i had throughout the night. shivering and rubbing my arms i continue walking to chris’ car to sit down for a sec and when i reach the backseat i see chris’ naked back and steamy windows. i take a step back once i realize whats happening.
i knew he was going to end up fucking someone tonight since thats what he said his plan was but i did not need to fucking see it. hes not mine for the taking obviously, but seeing him constantly with girls just hurt.
i turn around to walk back into the house but suddenly feel sick to my stomach. i hunch over and throw up in the middle of the road. i cough and collapse to my knees continuing to gag as strings of spit come out of my mouth. i hear a car door shut behind me as i try to stand up wiping my mouth. i feel arms grab my waist and pick me up bridal style and thats the last thing i remember before everything went black.
-
i wake up in a car with the same clothes on from the party, still drunk, my hair crispy and the smell of cologne. i look around me and realize its chris’ backseat im laying in but its still pitch black out.
i hear faint voices outside and the door my head is resting on swings open and my head flys back.
“holy shit chris are you trying to kill her” i hear matts voice. “shut up, i didn’t know you put her head there.” chris says as he starts pulling me out of the car.
“chris” i say quietly. “holy shit your awake” he says leaving me to sit up. “yeah i am, what happened. i think i- blacked out.” i say slurring my words.
“well i was in the middle of getting with summer-“ he says getting on his knees to talk to me better “and i just heard gagging outside the car and it was bothering me and i looked outside the car and you were bent over on the middle of the road throwing up. i just grabbed you and told summer to fuck off and put you in the car while i grabbed matt and anna.”
“oh my god” i say as i nod off.
“woah woah stay with us here, chris lets get her inside now” matt says placing my head back up.
“where is anna?” i question.
“we had to drop her home and bring you to our house since she said her parents couldn’t see you like this.”
“of course” i say
classic anna.
“what time is it?” i ask rubbing my eyes.
“2:44am” chris grunts taking me out of the car.
“ok lets get you inside” chris says pulling me up to stand. “you think you can walk inside?” he says still holding me up. “ill try.”
he lets go of me and i slowly make it up to the front of their house but start wobbling once i reach the steps and feel both matt and chris grab either side of me and help me up to the front door. matt holds on to my arm as he uses the house key to get inside and i walk in.
they walk me over to the living room couch and i slump over resting my head on the arm rest of the couch.
“where is she going to sleep?” matt says. “my room obviously.” chris says as i smile to myself.
“come on y/n” he says picking me up again and bringing me to his room to lay on his bed. “im gonna give you clothes to change into since yours are covered in vomit.” he says opening drawers. i nod my head as my eyes close.
he tosses me a big white shirt with some graphic designing on it “can you dress yourself or-“ i cut him off “yea- yeah i got it” i say sitting up right and hiccup.
he turns around so i can change into the shirt. i begin taking my long sleeve off and i get one arm off before i get stuck. “chris, help” i say quietly and he turns around to see me with my arms slouched and my eyes closed. he rushes over “lift up your arms” he says pulling my hands up. i hold them up as he grabs the hem of my shirt and slowly pulls up. i admire chris as he pulls off the shirt completely throwing my shirt across the room all while being careful not to look at me.
he grabs his shirt and places it gently over my head and then threading my arms through the shirt. “wait” he says walking over to his closet, grabbing a pair of his sweatpants and walking over to me with them. i sit there with my eyes closed smiling as i had thought about the scenario of him taking my clothes off many times, just not the me being so drunk i cant dress myself part.
he takes my jeans off and helps me in to his sweatpants still being respectful and not starring at my body. “ill be right back just sit here im going to get you water and an advil.” he say as he walks out of the room. i just sit there, my eyes still closed, still smiling and nod at his sentence.
i lay back down on his bed and wait as i hear him rushing upstairs talking to matt and nick before walking back in to the room sitting down at the end of his bed. “sit snd open up.” i obliged to his words before he places two advils on my tongue.
“im going to fill up your mouth with water so don’t breathe.” he says opening up a water bottle and slowly pouring some in to my mouth while my head tilts upwards slightly. he watches me with concern as i swallow the water.
“please never get drunk like this ever again, you really freaked everyone out kid.” he says. i don’t respond and nod at his words.
kid, the all too familiar nickname chris gave me. it always made me feel weird when he called me this as if he was an authority figure or something.
i lay back down on his bed and close my eyes and quickly drift off to sleep. the last thing i remember from that night is him crawling in to his bed next to me and turning off his light.
“goodnight kid”
-
thank you for reading!!!
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dexiiexox · 6 months
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On tour with Matt!
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a/n: I’ve been gone for a whiiilleeeee… heh :,)) buuttt I tried my best at writing this, even though I feel like Matt and Chris would be pretty similar while on tour, but I tried making it kinda different :)
Matt Sturniolo x reader
warnings: kissing, not much more really?
summary: what I think Matt would be like on tour :>
SORRY FOR ANY SPELLING MISTAKES❕
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First off I he would also have to beg you to come. Since you onbviously didnt want to ruin anything and you wanted Matt to have fun on tour.
"Babyy.. pleaasee, I promise you its no bother at all" Matt was sprawled over my bed, begging me to join him and his brothers on The versus Tour.
"But Matt I’m not so sur-"
"No but’s y/n, I genuenly want you to come, Chris and Nick dont mind at all!" he sat up, at the edge of my bed now.
I sighed.
"Please.. I need you to be there.." he was really begging. The way his doe eyes was pleading with you, made you finally give in to him.
"Alright.. Ill come with you Matt"
I stepped closer to him, in between his legs and he took a hold of my waist. I raked my hands through his hair for a little before my hands found their place on his cheeks before I bendt down and places a kiss on his lips.
Like we all know, Matt has anxiety and I feel like people might make it like such a big thing in their hc or fanfics. Dont get me wrong, anxiety can be different for different people.
But on tour I feel like Matt would need some ressurance or calling down before going on stage sometimes.
There would be a few times before one of the shows where he would get angsty, maybe overthink a few things or he’d straight up stressed (wether that is becuase he’s about to go on stage or some other stuff idk)
I also feel like Matt would be glued to your side, he’d be by your side every possible second (bro barely lets you get up go to the toilet)
Hand on your thigh when youre driving places or eating out, holding your hand, locking pinkies or having his arm over your shoulder when youre walking together, hugging you from behind and just random hugs in general (oh to be hugged by Matthew🥲💕) holding around you in bed, cuddling, spooning, you name it, he’s all for it🫶😘
I stod by the kitchen isle in the hotellroom we were staying in. I was making myself some tea (or any other profferes drink🌝). I was just standing there for a little, deep in thought, when suddenly two hands smaker around my waist, a familiar scent entered my nose and a head found its place on my shoulder.
"Hey Matt" I giggled.
"Hey sweetheart"
I felt his hot breath on my neck before he placed a kiss on my shoulder. We stod like that for a little while, enjoying the hug before sitting down by the table. Matt sat down with me and placed a hand on my thigh. I giggled slightly looking over at him.
"Are you okay Matt?" I asked, I always want to make sure nothing is bothering him.
"Yeah, just wanna spend time with my loving girlfriend" he smiled and kisses my cheek. I blused at his comment.
"Oh shush.." I mumbled taking a sip of my drink.
Like Chris, Matt would definetly pay for you everywhere you guys go, wether its some random plush at the thrift shop or youre going out for food. He is paying, no questions asked (treating you like the queen you are girl😘👑)
And of course he would make sure youre always comfertable with everything. And I mean everything. He wants everything to be perfect and that youre comfertable 110% of the time, that youre updated on plans so you know when everything is happening. (He’ll go to great lenghts for you babes, love Matt fr💕)
It would be the smallest things, and you’d hve to constantly reassure him its alright.
"Are you sure you want to sleep in these small bunks? I can figure out something else, more spacious and comfertab-" Matt had started rambling on about rearranging my sleeping space after I made the smallest comment about the tiny bunks in the tour bus.
"Matt its alright" I cut him off.
"The bunks are fine, they were just smaller than I expected" I laughed a little.
"Are you sure though? I can arrange something else if not you know" he rubbed the back of his neck and gave me a questioning look.
"Im sure Matt, dont worry, the bunks are fine" I smiled, walked over to him and gave his lips a little peck.
"If you say so" he chuckle lightly and just smiled at me.
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Heyhey, just wrote this from the top of my head💀 so sorry if its terrible. Ive been busy lately sooo yeah. This was lowkey pretty short, but I hope you still enjoyed it :))👍
Anyways, I hope you had a good night or day and youre worth so much💕💕
-dexy💕
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fatesmono · 3 months
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valentines day with yoongi
✮⋆˙ warning : some language + i haven’t written in half a year so.
✮⋆˙ this is an “x reader” so yk insert gender <3
✮⋆˙a.n : so todays valentine’s day (its the 13th at 11:59 posting this, great job me :3). so happy valentines i guess. i’m spending it celebrating jaehyun's birthday and writing abt my husband who’s in the war. i haven’t written in like, six years (six months) so pls go easy on me 
✮⋆˙enjoy loves <3333 happy valentines day !!
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i never liked valentine’s day. it was always a stupid ass holiday if i do say so myself. am i saying that bc i never had a good valentine ? …maybe so, why are you so nosy ?? anyways, that was before i met him, min yoongi. i never met a man who says he hates a holiday so much but also goes all out for it. our first valentines last year i expected him to not really get me anything or like a bouquet of flowers since it wasn’t that much…i got a bouquet alright, like seven of them (he had said he didn’t know which one i would like so he just got me all of the ones he thought i would want), plus a shit ton of chocolate and just little things like one of his hoodies and this ring i had been eyeing for like months beforehand. so much for “valentines day isn’t really my thing” right ? all men do is lie, even min yoongi.
okay but anyways, here we are now, a year later. i wanna prove myself this year, i refuse to be out-valentines’d by him, no matter what that takes. now just one problem, he’s rich, i work at a coffee shop. shit, i know right ? but we will make it work i don’t care. 
so have i had this planned out for the last two months like a gta heist ? yes. but i NEED this day to go perfect. did it ? NO. NO IT DIDNT. first the necklace i got him with his name won’t be ready until the 17th, and then the kiss hoodie i was working on for him GETS BLEACHED SPILLED ON HIM, curtesy of our cat, johnny, and then; if it wasn’t going awful anyway, the cupcakes i made for him burned. and i’m going to his studio as we speak…this is my thirteenth reason. so right now all we have is his favorite flowers, a bleached hoodie with my kisses and a book of poems i wrote for him, sigh. SIGH. and if it didn’t help, he already gave me half of my gift before he left and it’s ten times better. A ROSE GOLD NECKLACE, he got me a rose gold encrusted with the sun because “i’m the sun to his moon”, he makes me wanna bash my head sometimes from how sweet he is. 
so getting to his studio, the definition of “shaking in my little boots”. i can hear him practicing his music from outside his studio, it’s like walking into beethoven working on smth if beethoven was your 30 year old idol boyfriend for a kpop group, if that makes sense, which is doesn’t so. anyways, i put in the code for his studio (it’s our anniversary, excuse me while i cry.) and quietly walk in to not disturb him, which isn’t that hard since he has tunnel vision as he invented it, and quietly tap his shoulder gently to get his attention. he turns around, taking off his headphones and noticing me with a small smile on his face, which might as well have been a kiss from him then and then. 
“hey love, happy valentine’s day, what are you doing here ?”, god why does he have to have such a perfect voice; it’s like he doesn’t even have to try. i go on to give him to give him his gift and try to explain that i had much more to give him and i knew it wasn’t enough to give and- and he cuts me off. good job if i do say so myself because the yapping i do, i could win a medal. 
“honey honey, this is perfect…you didn’t even have to get me anything, and you wrote me poems…that’s like writing me a song, this means the world to me. you remembered my favorite flowers, and this hoodie..i don’t think i’ve ever gotten a gift like this from anyone before, not even the guys. thank you so much…”, and my heart just turns into a puddle then and there. all my worries gone in a second, how does he do it ? he really should’ve become a therapist in another life, but i guess he does that with his music. but anyways, did i expect him to like the gift ? absolutely not. i did try to pay for dinner that night and he still didn’t let me do it, saying it was “an extra gift” as if i needed anymore gifts. remind me next to try and not outgift a rich idol who’s secret love language is definitely gift giving. 
i’m still getting next years gifts ready anyways. i’m so winning next year, i don't care.
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femmedesyeuxnoirs · 2 months
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Im 6 months clean from binging and purging literally every day and regardless of how corny it feels to say im so proud of myself. I used to think i couldnt live any other way and honestly some of those nights i was like this might be it. I felt that the end was coming and i was ready. I planned leaving a huge tray of water and the food bag out for the cat because i didnt know how long it would take for someone to find my body. I had fully resigned myself to death but somehow one day i just decided i wanted to live. No idea how but i chose survival. insane to think how severe it got but i still came out the other side. On the other hand. It makes me want to cry bc nobody in my life actually knows any of this. I did it all myself without any help but ironically, and maybe selfishly, i need someone to tell me theyre proud of me and happy i didnt die. But right now if i told my best friend hey btw this entire time ive known you ive been bulimic and got close to death up until i stopped 6 months ago are u proud of me. It would just feel wrong. because it feels almost selfish to keep such a horrible life altering condition to myself just to preserve my pride when i have no reason to. Bc I know she would try to understand and love me either way so to hide it and act as if she wouldnt feels like a betrayal to her. But i did and thats why im writing this on my blog instead
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cloudcountry · 1 year
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Hello again, and congrats for your 1k!! WOOO!! 🎉🎉🎉 I've just recently follow you and I instantly fall in love with your writing ((I stumble upon like real people do series))
If i may ask how much have you progress in NB? Have you read the new lesson?? 😭😭😭
If you have, I would request for sol's version— since idk why the dev didnt put sol's part in there ((probably him being busy))
If not! I would love to read some serious talking between MC and Solomon about their relationship.. like, well you know right Solomon have been through like A LOT.
Once again, congrats!! 🎉🎉 You deserve it (⁠≧⁠▽⁠≦⁠)
thank you!!!!! that series is my pride and joy i worked so hard on it and the feedback for it has been so !#@!@#!@!@!@!!!@!@!@!@!!!!!!!!!! /pos
i'm like halfway through lesson 12,,, i didnt get to it until like two days after its release and my cards are pretty weak (OBEY ME STOP HAVING CRAZY STRENGTH JUMPS BETWEEN LESSONS CHALLENGE ITS LITERALLY THE 12TH ONE!!!!! makes me worried for lesson 20 smh)
this isn't exactly a one word prompt but meh its cute so!! plus ive gotten SO MANY solomon rqs for the event i love you guys C: thank you again!! ^^ <333
SPOILERS FOR OBEY ME NIGHTBRINGER LESSON 12
The door opens once again.
Nobody should be in your room this late. Not any of the brothers, at any rate.
“Hey, MC.” Solomon sighs, kneeling at your bedside.
Your heart thunders in your chest at the tender look on his face, eyebrows furrowed and lips twisted into a wry smile. If you didn’t know him any better, you’d say he found this amusing. That’s probably what he likes to think.
“It’s been a while. Three days too long.” he says, reaching out to you, “You’ll come back soon though, right? You wouldn’t want to leave me all lonely.”
He cups your face, brushing his thumb over the skin. He mumbles something about how you’re still warm and that’s good, but it breaks your heart because that means his mind is telling him you might be dead. You wish you could move, you wish you could pull him into bed next to you and thank him for everything he’s done for you. He’s put himself in the most dangerous of situations, even braving time itself to come back and save you. He made sure you weren’t alone and stayed with you when you needed someone the most, and yet he still feels as though he’ll never be enough for you.
At this rate, he’ll destroy himself for you.
But Solomon just laughs. He sucks in air through his teeth as if he’s in pain, and for a second you can see a grimace on his face.
“I’ll have some of your favorite snacks for you when you come back to me.” he whispers, leaning over your body like a safety blanket, “I’ll make them myself. I’ll make them just for you.”
He kisses your forehead, and you feel a cold drop of something hit your skin.
Tears.
Your heart shatters in your chest as Solomon leaves.
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bugboysgf · 3 months
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Jealousy,Jealousy Pt.2
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AN: Okay so like, i'm sorry for disappearing but i promised myself this year i would write more, so i swear i won't take another three months to write again. I saw someone ask for part two so enjoy :)     ( I wrote this in like 40 mins so sorry for all the errors.)
summary: Peter likes Liz, but you can't shake this feeling that he might feel something for you. (repost)
Peter knew what he did was wrong and he wanted to fix it but he didnt know how. You were a  stubborn person .He couldn't have gone to Ned for help because everytime Ned gave him advice. It always backfires so he was going to say the only girl that wasn’t mad at him for advice.
Peter walked into the living room feeling super tired, all night he was wondering how he could make it up to you.
“Hey peter, your up early.” May said as Peter sat down at the table. “You want some coffee?”
“Yes please,” Peter said in a tired voice. May smiled at him and grabbed a cup from out of the cabinet. 
“You're never up this early, what's going on?” she said putting the mug down.
Peter takes a long sip and shakes his head “nothing”
She gave him a ‘Yea sure” look “Come on peter i know you..what's up.”
Peter didn't know how to explain what happened but he knew that may was the only girl that could help him. “ I messed up at the party.”
“Did you get into a fight?” May asked. 
“No, like with a girl,” Peter explains. 
“With Liz? Listen Peter i don't really like her she gives me bad v-”
“No not with Liz!”  He cuts her off  “with y/n.” 
“Y/n? What did you do Peter” May says in a worried tone, she liked you so the idea of him messing up with you caused her to worry. 
“I kissed Liz infront of her.” Peter grits his teeth out of a cringe . He hates thinking about how dirty he did you. He wishes he could go back and change everything.
“Why on earth did you do that? You told me you liked her.” “I do” peter defend himself “but it was a dare, i was asked to kiss the prettiest girl in the room and i choose liz because what if y/n didn't like me, then i would have lost a friend that night.” he explains 
“Come on Peter, I told you she likes you it's so obvious , go to school and fix the mess you caused.”
“But how?”
“Figure it out!” May wanted to help him but he had to learn how to deal with this on his own.
You knew that you had to face Peter but you didn't want to. The whole weekend ,every time you thought about Friday night, it brought you to tears. You didn't know why though, it could've been the fact that your crush kissed the girl that you despise in front of you or because you were so vulnerable with Peter, you cried to him and it was something that you've never done before. And for him to just sit there and look at you without saying a word made it worse.
“Hey” Mj said to you as you guys walked into school.
“Oh hi, what's up?” you said without a care in the world, you didn't want her to know that you were hurting from what happened but to her it was all written over your face.
“Oh well i don't know… you tell me” she said in a sarcastic tone “texted you all weekend with no response. You left the party without saying bye.” “It's not like you don't have my location, you knew where I was.” you rolled your eyes.
“Come on y/n i know what Peter did is bothering you.” she said, turning her  unlock to her locker.
“Well of course it is like-” you opened your locker and a rose and card fell out. You look at Mj “what the hell?” you say confused you pick up the rose and card from off the floor. “Im sorry please forgive me- peter” you read the note out loud.
You look in the way that Peter's locker is in just to catch him staring at you with a smile on his face. You gave him a forced smile and started to walk up to him.
“Yes the plan worked.” he says to himself still smiling, his smile dropped when he watched you walk right past him and throw the rose and card in the trash. Maybe his plan didn't work after all
You managed to make it to lunch and avoid talking to Peter, you had mostly every class with him so that was impressive on your part. Now it was time for lunch. Mj had electives so she couldn't join you so you sat alone, most of your friends had their own little group but now that you weren't talking to Peter the group was disconnected you knew Ned was going to take his best friend's side even if he was wrong.
Peter saw you sitting alone, he could tell something was bothering you and he knew it was his fault. Every second that he went without talking to you seemed like torture and he had to fix it. He didn't care if you shooed him away because he would just try again. He excused himself at the table he was sitting at and made his way over to your table.
You were so out of it that you didn't even see him approaching you. He sat down and you looked at him with a dull expression on your face. It made him question if he should be even doing this. 
“Please forgive me” you looked at him and didn't say a word. “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you.”
“You didn't” you say.
“I didn't?.” peter says relieved
“No, like I said before you just made everything clear. I was just blind i see.”  you said. Peter didn't say a word. “See you didnt change! You're doing the same silent thing you did at the party.”
Every second Peter goes with saying a word, he can feel you slipping away but it couldn't form the words to even explain how sorry he felt.
“I'm going to go,” you say, rolling your eyes. 
“I like you” he blurts out.
“What?” you said.
“I like you.” he says again without hesitation.
“No,” you shake your head. “You like Liz.”
“I- i don't…i like you.”
“You don't have to say that to make me feel better….What about the other girl?” it was hard for you to believe what peter was saying, yes you wanted him to like you but why couldn't he just have told you at the party.
“The other girl was you. I chose to like Liz because I thought there was no way you could have liked me, then at the party you confessed to liking me so ....”
“Oh” was all you could say, you smiled to yourself taking in the information that Peter just told you. “Are you sure?” you wanted to make sure you aren't dreaming.
“Yes, I'm sure,” he says, smiling. “Do you forgive me?” 
“Only if you forgive me for acting weird.”
“Of course…do you think it's too soon to ask you on a date?”
“No, never too soon” you laughed 
“Okay… so olive garden after school?” he asked.
“How could  I say no to the olive garden?”
Request are open!
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cherryberg · 1 month
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Also. This is your sign to introduce an OC. Here and now
hi ardate :] this is a bit late but, since i did it, i might as well introduce her now in this post
for my april fool's day joke, i did a little trick on the find everything discord server where i made a handful of screenshots showing a new (fake) character:
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this is Myla Warper, a Whatsit Woods NPC
i don't have much on her at the moment, and i suspect a lot about her lore will become obsolete when 0.3 comes around, but essentially, she's an engineer and the inventor of the Warp, the in-game fast travel system. she spends a lot of time at home, but is getting out a little more, using the Warp and a range of mobility aids
she managed to trick a few folks (which, looking at how the first find everything hoax, wouldn't've been a hard thing to pull off) but, shortly after - though, in retrospect, it could've been left revealed until the end of the day, i revealed the prank with:
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anyway, i'll put the fake screenshots under the cut and maybe post Myla concepts in a reblog :] + notes. there'll be notes. i've got notes
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i don't remember when exactly i conceptualised Myla, but it might've been between when 0.2 was released and when the developers streamed their 0.2 launch stream a few days later. this is because i had this thought of Myla living in that old abandoned house, working away at her tech (in the early stages, Myla's outfit in my mind would be a the classic tanktop and half-worn jumpsuit where the top half was tied around her waist, you know the look), but obviously had to be just a fun scrapped idea when it was discussed on the stream that Old Man Majig lives there
still, Myla being hidden away in this corner of Whatsit Woods is reminiscent of that idea i guess. it is also just a very good spot for something you could've missed, especially since the community had been combing through save files looking for the second fun value, but it does sort of make her following dialogue a little strange as she's not near any Warp pads
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this bit is meant to, like, mirror dialogue from "tutorial NPCs" who casually introduce new concepts to the player. having worked hard on drawing Illie last year for Halloween, i had her a lot in mind, with Illie also being a tutorial NPC. looked over her 5 lines of dialogue a lot to try and get the vibe down right (of course, she wasn't the only one, but she was the main one) .. i can wrap my head around the Find Everything art style, but writing stuff that matches the FE vibe got me stumped so i hope it didnt stand out all that much
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originally, those first two lines where different and. stiffer for a long while ("I actually make a few Warp Drives myself!"/"Er… Let's not be humble, maybe more than a few. Maybe all of 'em."), but i think it worked out in the end. the very first bit of dialogue was also changed ("Hey there, blockling! Just on a walk.") to just be combined with the next line but i just really wanted to preserve that "blockling" here. i know it's just the species name of like. the Roblox character, but it also reads as a little endearing term to me
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ahh, the reason why i sort of thought up Myla in the first place. see, a big contention in the find everything community is Whatsit Woods being the only major area in the game without a Warp Drive, despite there already being Warp pads by its entrances in two neighbouring areas. the lack of a Whatsit Woods Warp is very likely to be changed with the 0.3 map rework, but i always thought this (and the Construction Zone Warp.. ) discourse was stupid. Myla going "No. Why? I live here." is like. cathartic to me.(??)
but regardless, she and Watcher Macallit are kind of ocs born from asking "why is this the way it is?" why is there no Whatsit Warp Drive? what makes a Thing a Thing? just ocs to play with and sort of expand worldbuilding, and i love doing this
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fallingfor-fics · 5 months
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Teachers Pet- Chapter 72: Your Power
All Chapters
Previous Chapter
Warnings: none
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I woke up to the feeling of Severus getting up for work. He apparated me to the school after he got ready, tucking me into the bed in his private quarters, insisting I rest one more day before returning to school. It was also early and he wasn't going to leave me alone at his house and figured I better come back at some time. I slept a few more hours waking up to the sound of Severus teaching in his room, yelling at some first years I'm sure. Looking at the clock I guessed it was second period. I laughed to myself before sitting up slowly, yawning and pushing back my hair. I slowly stood hearing my joints pop as I moved towards my suitcases, shrinking them I put on my robes, tucking the small cases in my pockets and putting on my slippers. I sighed and tried apparating back to my dorm, I opened my eyes but was still in Snapes bedroom.  I frowned, exhausted and not having much energy at the moment. I realized something though, Severus probably knows all that. 
"I swear if he trapped me in here-" I muttered before grabbing my wand. I closed my eyes and focused, mustering up as much energy as I could although I felt incredibly drained. I muttered a spell to let me get past any spells Severus might have used, he probably shouldnt have taught me that one but, he was worried. Feeling the familiar waves of nausea, I popped back into my bedroom. There was no one there because of classes, so I used the time to put away my things, just waving my wand around to put things away. I got into the shower, watching as red water washed down the drain from the dried blood on my back and waist. Zoning out as I scrubbed over the scars on my body. They were still healing, red and sore. I didnt dwell on it too much. Hurrying with the rest of my routine. I finished up, getting dressed and doing some light makeup. I felt tired, but I'd already missed a day of school, and I had enough energy to go to at least half of my classes. I sighed as I checked the time, lunch was just about to end so I decided to just wait and catch Draco on his way to potions. Realizing I wasn't sure how Harry was, or if Draco even knew of what happened over vacation.
Making my way down the halls, I saw the tall blonde boy walking down through the dungeons. I quickly walked over to him tapping on his shoulder with a smile, "Hey!" I said excitedly, he turned to face me and had a tired look on his face, dark circles beneath his eyes, a bruise surely spread across his cheek, with pale skin and messy hair, "What's wrong? What happened to your face?" I asked quickly shifting to a concerned look. "Did your dad do that? Is it about Harry? I know that was scary but he's ok-" he just shook his head, "It's not Harry okay? I don't want to talk about it." he wouldn't even look me in the eyes and just kept walking to class. I just nodded as I followed him there, walking in with him. I figured Severus had not realized I wasn't in his room since he was busy catching up on work and assumed I would be sleeping all day. I followed Draco in, him walking fast ahead. I noticed Severus was facing away from us, writing something on the chalkboard. I noticed a strange thing when I walked in, as soon as I stepped in the room, he stopped and turned. He made eye contact with me, giving me a glance over and then looking away and back to what he was writing. It was subtle, but it was like he sensed I'd come in and tried his best to ignore my presence. I went and sat with Draco. Watching him look down like a zombie, still and tired. Not even present.
I heard the sound of the bell and looked up at the front, Severus was setting down the chalk and watching the last few scrambling students take their seats. He looked over at me and I could tell by the look he gave me. He wasn't happy I was up walking around already. I noticed he glanced over at Draco, and the boy was looking back at him, slowly looking away again and Severus just had a look of concern and sympathy. I furrowed my brows at the exchange and watched as Severus cleared his throat and waved his hand, shutting the door.
"I apologize for my absence yesterday," he paused, glancing at me for a moment before continuing "read these chapters and answer these questions." was all Snape said, pointing to the board, "Turn it in at the end of class." he added in his deep velvety voice, walking over to his desk and sitting down scribbling away. Draco didn't speak all class, I finished before him unlike normal, he was so distracted. I looked at Severus and he was still hunched over writing. I pushed my paper over to Draco so he could see my answers. He looked over and relaxed his shoulders, copying what I had written. Class was quiet and bare. No one chatted in here out of fear of our Professor. The bell rang soon and all the kids flooded out. Draco took off, not even stopping to wait for me. I got up and walked out without a glance in Severus' direction, figuring I'd talk to him tonight.
My plans were tarnished when I realized Severus wasn't at dinner, nor was he in his room after. I didn't want to look weird consistently checking on him, so after noticing his absences twice I stuck around in my room. Doing some homework I had and then reading a book, which I still had yet to get around to finishing. I checked my clock and it was around midnight almost two. Everyone in my room was sleeping and so was the rest of the school I assumed. Stepping onto the cold floors I got up and put my robes on over my silk nightgown, putting on my slippers and grabbing my wand. I couldn't help but let myself get carried away worrying about Severus. I knew he was probably fine, but I wanted to talk to him about this morning and class, and I hadn't seen him since. I thought for a moment about which teacher would be on duty, knowing it wasnt Severus. I couldn't think of whose night it was so I just shrugged it off, figuring I would be hiding from them anyways.
Tiptoeing out of the room, through the common room, I made my way into the hall. Not seeing any lights and grateful his classroom wasn't too far. I made my way slowly and quietly down the hall. Shivering at the cold air that passed me, leaving goosebumps on my skin. I hoped that he was awake if he was still here at all. I heard shuffling and quickly stopped to look around. I heard a few steps and voices and moved to the shadows, waving my wand and camouflaging with the wall. I saw a soft glow coming from around the corner and heard two muttering voices. "Yes Minerva I assure you there isn't anything to worry about for the time being." I heard the familiar deep voice whisper and I tensed up, backing up to the wall. "I just dont think Albus is fit to be juggling so much right now." I heard the older Professor quarrel. I furrowed my brows at her comment and watched as they came into view. "Albus knows his limits." Severus commented in his usual annoyed tone, they stopped only five feet from me, "But should he need assistance, or something were to change-" I saw Severus look in my general direction glancing over the area and I internally panicked, even though I was surely not visible, it really felt like he was looking me in the eyes. "I will let you know first if your assistance is needed Minerva, now if you'll excuse me I must get to grading." I watched as he reassured the woman and she nodded, glancing over his stance and walking off. He watched as she walked away, until she was out of sight and her footsteps could no longer be heard.
He stood there for a moment making sure no one else was around, "Come on." he said in a stern tone still, walking to his door and opening it. I took off the spell and hung my head down like a shameful pet as I walked into his room. "Merlin Y/n what the hell were you doing?" he said, setting his things down on his desk rather harshly. "How did you see me?" I whined unfairly. "Because i'm not an amateur." he groaned and I sighed at his tone. Minerva had gone I didn't understand why he was still talking that way. "What do you want?" he asked, walking over to the door to his private quarters.
 "You weren't at dinner." I said remembering the night he'd bugged me with the same statement. "Yes.." he drawled out in annoyance and I rested my hand on my hips and chewed the inside of my cheek. "Is something the matter?" I asked softly and he laughed as I followed him into his room. "I don't know, i've had a long day and I come back to find a student hiding, not very well I might add, outside my door in the middle of the night." I frowned at his disappointment and followed him to his bedroom as he put things away. "I'm sorry but McGonagall didn't see me, ok? That's the whole point of the spell." He hung up his robes and looked down at me, "She's very smart Y/n and I doubt you are so confident, to not make a mistake and expose us!" he quipped and I furrowed my brows at him, I grew annoyed with the way he was speaking to me, and often grew tired of his hot and cold behavior when it came to our relationship being a secret. He noticed the shift in my face and the damper on my eyes, "I just wanted to see you." I stated simply and his own face shifted. Frowning lightly I saw his dark eyes warm up as he took a step back and realized his sharp demeanor. "I apologize." he said softly, sitting down on the edge of the bed and looking forward.
I sat next to him doing the same, "it's okay, you just need to learn to check yourself sometimes. Especially when talking to me. I'm not just any other student when we are alone." He nodded and I took his hand, intertwining our fingers. "How did you get out without me realizing this morning?" he asked and I shook my head, "You mean how did I get through your little trap?" He stayed quiet and I let out a sigh, "I know you just wanted me to stay close by, but you can't literally lock me in your room." I laughed and he nodded, "It was a momentary lapse in judgement." he excused and I just laughed resting my head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry about leaving class without talking to you." I added and he just shook his head, "It's alright, it's not like I asked you to stay anyhow." I thought for a moment about the interaction between Draco and him figuring it wouldn't hurt to ask. "What's going on with Draco?" I asked leaning my head back up and looking at him, "Im not sure, but with the spring vacation events, im sure he was left unwell." I shook my head, not believing that to be a good reason. "I think Lucius hit him." I said sadly and Severus didn't hesitate in nodding along, "I wouldn't put it past him." I frowned at the comment. Rubbing my hands over my face. "I can't believe I ever fooled around with him." I mumbled ashamed and Severus just stayed quiet. I looked over at him and could tell he was pouting over my comment.
"Are you jealous Sev?" I asked lightheartedly, staring at his expression. He sat still and turned to look at me, an annoyed look having taken over his face, "No." he drawled out in his deep velvety voice. "Oh come now, its alright if you are." I reassured him and he scoffed, "Im not jealous, and I sure as hell wouldn't be jealous of that man, ever." I read his face, seeing how his brow raised and his jaw tightened. I snaked my hands up over his shoulders, rubbing them slightly, "Awe are you worried about Lucius still having power over me?" I teased, removing my robes and moving up on my knees, standing behind him on the bed, continuing to massage his shoulders. I could feel he was still tense at the question, "No.." he retorted, sinking into my hands and not protesting my actions. "Its sounding a bit like you are.." I continued poking at him and he let out a breath, probably rolling his eyes as well. "Why must you harass me?" he exaggerated and I smiled, stopping my hands, and leaving them on his shoulders as I leaned down by his ear. I whispered gently, "Because I know, that you know, even if he did have power over me, it wouldn't be shit compared to the power that you have." surely breathing hot air on his neck, he tensed up again, raising a brow at the statement and turning to look at me. "Is that so?" he smirked and I bit my lip as I smiled and nodded. "Well in that case.." he spoke as he turned his body to face mine, leaning against the headboard. I straddled his lap and we gazed into each others eyes. He reached up and softly tucked my hair from my face, "I will be using this power often now you know?" he teased and I shrugged, "Oh no its the end of the world!" I mocked, leaning in to kiss him as I giggled. He looked over at the clock and then back at me, "Its almost two Y/n, its already bad enough you are in my private quarters during the day." he stated and I just ignored his comment, running my hands up his chest and around his jaw, kissing him once again. 
Taglist; @lovelyhoneylemon @juliijah @lmao-liz
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lotsadeer · 1 month
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Fic Author's Self Rec
Rules: When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let's spread the self-love
I am being forced to be nice to myself by @redtailedhawk90 (jk they arent forcing me to do anything, I just don't consider myself much of a writer despite people telling me I write good so I'm trying to be nicies to myself)
part-time soulmate, full time-problem, (nsfw) a MCYT fic I co-wrote with @strangeharpy about Mumbo Jumbo pining after Grian and Scar. It's the first co-written fic I've ever done and August and I were extremely self indulgent with it. Soulmate au my beloved, it covers some of season 8 and then spans most of season 9 with Mumbo being an absolute spoon.
Oh captain, make up your mind, is a Dumb Kids Playing Hero fic about a scene that didn't happen but OH BOY DID I WANT IT TO! Featuring my character Solin from the Seerow's Folly mini arc, as well as the other Andalites in that arc, and the Taxxons from the Hunger Pains mini arc, and focusing on the trauma and feelings Solin has about Taxxons and what he thinks about them being allies with the main cast. Schrag, one of the players from the Hunger Pains arc, has ALSO written a fic along similar lines, but from the Taxxons side and I highly recommend it. Diplomatic Relations
Extracurricular Activities, another DKPH fic I wrote because there's a very not subtle through line with one of the characters about being a dog. It's safe for work pet play about Adrian learning to let himself relax and drop into a safe space with Alma without having to morph into a dog. It's honest to god one of my favourite things I've written I think.
so you can leave like the sane, abandon me is a Friends at the Table COUNTER/Weight fic about Mako Trig having imposter syndrome. I wrote this in 2019 and I reread it for this meme and literally went hey past me why have you made it your mission to hurt present me??? It's a short fic, less than 700 words, and was definitely me projecting onto Mako.
Next Life, a traffic series fic, was written before Secret Life came out about Martyn and how he might be feeling after Limited Life, and how he might interact with Ren, after Ren was away from the series. Obviously none of this happened but it was fun for me to write.
Gonna tag @apollothetransboy, @ilexdiapason, @pfdiva, and @sameenbyhat ! no obligation to do the meme, and if anyone wants to do it that I didnt tag please feel free :D
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wrishwrosh · 3 months
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Talk shop Tuesday!!! How do you decide what research to do for a specific fic and which details to include?
talk shop tuesday!! thank you!! this is a fun question bc im very prepared to articulate HOW i do research and WHY i do research but its a lot tougher to explain WHICH research. a lot of times i’ll decide on a vague premise or setting for a fic and then let the research suggest the story, like whatever interesting resources or anecdotes i come across then shape the plot. so in most cases i am researching before/during the drafting process rather than trying to fill in gaps while editing, i think “write first research later” is terrible advice that i dont follow. the rabbit hole is where the magic happens!!
example: i started ‘not a strange thing amongst the people’ with a vague idea of boyd and raylan in wwi meeting in the trenches or something, and then started researching to figure out the exact circumstances: what their wars would have been like, how a guy from kentucky might have ended up in europe, under what circumstances they would reconnect, where and when exactly this would be happening (on the one hand, probably few of these details would make it on the page and this level of rationalization doesn’t matter when The Trench is a perfectly legible symbol to most readers. ((its the scary wet place where homoeroticism happens!)) however i think its more fun and a better characterization exercise when its realer and also the cliche is right truth is very often stranger and cooler than fiction. history is full of extremely weird coincidences and patterns that make excellent stories.)
the original vague plot i had in my head for ‘not a strange thing’ based on zero research just vibes was boyd as a jaded middle aged kentucky national guard nco who got dragged to belgium and raylan as an mp or something and they reconnect while boyd is awaiting court marshal for some kind of uuhhhh trench scam. or something. however then i started digging into the minutiae of how enlistment worked in wwi and under what circumstances particular types of guys got sent overseas and then thought ‘hey were the marshals in the trenches could that be why raylan was there?’ and looked at one timeline on marshals dot gov to learn that the marshals stayed stateside spying on german civilians and chasing down draft dodgers and a little lightbulb went off in my head and then the story became a totally different story. and this was approximately minute 19 of the research process which was still the idle googling phase.
the other way i decide to do research is by questioning all my own assumptions as im writing. like if i am writing about a place or time that is not my own and i find myself going ‘yeah thats probably how things work’ then that is always going to be a productive place for more research and for the inclusion of detail based on that research bc the gaps between my experience and the character’s experience are why im writing the story. as another example a lot of the first bits i wrote for not a strange thing involved raylan having a car and driving around. this was just an instinctual decision i made (aka assumption) (also i had recently come across the phrase “touring car” and liked it and wanted to use it in something) and then questioning that instinct led to qs like well how did you get from lexington to harlan in 1918. what kind of cars would a marshal have had access to. if other marshals in other places in the country didnt NOT have cars could raylan have had a car. and then that led to an unproductive rabbit hole where i was looking at archival marshal financial records to see if they were buying cars and then i had to just cut myself off and say raylan was allowed to drive. BUT i learned a lot about roads and transit and car culture in the place and time that i think made the story a little juicier.
as always this is long as hell and probably too detailed but i just like to talk about research! i just think its neat! talk shop!
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larabiatasstuff · 1 year
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Hey bestie, I have a request please 🤗 please could you write one about CK Terry? He is bestfriends with you while you work together, and one day you tell him you have been invited to a friends wedding. But you weren't sure weather you wanted to go, because you didnt know how to dance. So Terry offers to show you, and it's a slow and romantic kind of dance. But there is a moment where it changes between you too. No talking, just silence as this physical tention builds, before Terry gives you the best kiss of your life 🥺 take your time bestie, love you 💚
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Omg I absolutely love your request Bestie 🖤 I'm more than happy to write that for you 🤗I hope you like it 🙏
Terry and I worked together for almost two years now and over the time we became friends, best friends. We could talk about anything and had always a good laugh together. Tonight we were sitting on the terrace at Terry's house finishing some documents and having a drink together. "Oh Y/N by the way, do you already know what you wear at you friends wedding?" Terry asked "Yes I thought this might be perfect but... Actually I'm not sure if I keep it." I showed him the picture of a beautiful blue dress. "Wow I bet you look stunning in it. But why not keeping it? Tell me what bothers you?" I sighed "It's just I don't know if I'm going." "And why is that?" I looked down, playing with my fingers "I... I don't know how to dance and I don't want to embarrass myself." Terry looked at me with a serious expression. He would never make fun of me. "That's it? Y/N that's not a problem. I can teach you if you want." I was surprised "So you're not just teaching karate, you're also giving dance lessons?" he smiled at me "Well, just for very close friends, who already bought an absolutely beautiful dress and it would be a shame if she doesn't wear it. So, what do you say?" I nodded "Okay, teach me sensei." we both got up and Terry walked to a nearby table putting on a slow song on his record player. Then we stood right in front of each other. "May I?" he asked "Oh of course yes." right then he put one hand on my lower back, holding me close to his body. He guided my hand on his shoulder and took the other one in his hand. I felt weird but in a good way, being so close to him and being held like this gave me butterflies. He looked deep into my eyes and said "Let's start slow alright? Just let me guide you." his voice was low and almost a whisper. I just nodded in response and we slowly started swaying to the music. All my muscles were tense and I was constantly looking down to make sure I'm not stepping on his feet. Terry brought a finger under my chin to make me look at him, that was when our eyes locked and the time seemed to be standing still. He put a hand on my cheek stroking it gently. It was like I was frozen in place. Then he leaned down till our noses touched . He nudged me softly as if he'd ask for confirmation and before I knew it his lips were on mine. They moved perfectly against each other and the feeling was amazing. His lips were so soft and warm I thought I might lose my mind here and now. Sadly we had to break the kiss to get some air. "Y/N I... I thought about this so many times." Terry said still holding me close to his body. "I've never been kissed like this before Terry, it was wonderful actually more than wonderful it was everything I didn't know I needed." "I'm so happy you say that. I'm the luckiest man in the world tonight." he leaned down and gave me another wonderful kiss. "Terry I thought... Well since things changed between us, would you like to be my plus one and come with me to the wedding?"
He smiled softly " It would be a pleasure to go with you sweetheart." we spent the rest of the night practicing, laughing and of course enjoying our time together.
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selamat-linting · 4 months
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living after experiencing sa is so weird like, the same piece of writing about assault could do nothing or it could send me into a week long spiral and its just a matter of dumb luck or pure chance that determines my brains' reaction to it. i've had moments where im legitimately triggered in the middle of re-reading something i actually enjoy as porn. over the years i figured it was because i had small triggers that are abstract or wasnt easily noticeable or doesnt feel like anything until its in the spesific context of sa. like being trapped in an enclosed space with strangers, begging to be sent home, being deceived, having your preferences and interests weaponized against you, the really lonely and painful walk home afterwards where no one comes to save you but maybe its better off this way since you dont want to be seen, those are things im particularly sensitive with. for example, a few years ago i got really messed up about this anecdote of a kid who got kidnapped by a neighbor for a few hours. he offered to see his cat and then lock them up in a room while theyre playing with said kittens. nothing actually happens but that made me legit depressed for a few days. while im fine talking with my friend about an incident where she got followed by a creepy guy who groped her while she's walking home. both situations are horrifying and bad ofc, but i cant exactly communicate or find an easy way to filter out the bad. like, i can handle hearing the graphic details, the bare bones account of what happens, but if it touches on how the victim was tricked or deceived or gets taken advantage of, even when its basically the least upsetting part, i just couldnt do it.
idk, maybe its because my experience was more in the mental stuff. yeah sure, it was only some groping, an almost kiss, and some sex talk. but the context was that i asked for help, someone friendly comes along, they say theyre just helping me but turns out they actually have ulterior motives. i was stuck in a car for hours to god knows where, fully knowing i was gonna get raped when the car eventually stops, trying to plead or at least delay it with someone i thought was a friend without being too harsh because i know they could do even worse things if i drop this thin veneer of friendliness we got going on. and all the while this asshole kept touching me in spots i didnt even realize was a sensitive place for me and i had to keep a straight face the whole time because if they see a hint that i liked it, its over. did i like though? yeah. do i want it? fuck no. never in a million years. and i felt betrayed because im supposed to have that moment of discovery with a boyfriend or a girlfriend and it was supposed to be nice and comforting but its not. and i might associate gentle touches with this forever. and there's also a part of me that said, hey somebody wants me. dont you want to be wanted? i might as well enjoy it because no one's gonna offer me hot car sex like this. i should try to get myself wet! this is a new experience that i should just see the bright side of. im supposed to be a kinky slut right? i just turned 20. and after all, i promised myself, after the first time i had my sa as a kid, the next time it happens im gonna fight. and what am i doing right now? i'm just running my mouth. im laughing at my soon to be rapists' joke and i tell him we should meet up later instead of doing everything right now since i had work later in the day. this isnt fighting, its bargaining. and all the while im wondering if i look pretty while im doing this. i hope i look pretty. im just wearing sweatshirt and pajama pants. this is sick, why do i want to look good while im sexually assaulted?
i never told this to anyone except a friend. but even she didnt get the whole account. she just know it happens. its the part that actually upsets me that i didnt tell her. the whole violated trust thing. and how dumb i am for instantly accepting help from an acquaintance i dont even know that well. and what happens after the car stops. all she knows is that when it stops, i pushed him off of me and i left the car and run.
to her it just seems like im valiantly fighting off an asshole. she didnt know that after i ran, a bunch of men saw me running. they asked me if i need help. they were kind. but i thought of the hassle of reporting to the police, being grilled with questions, have my entire behavior scrutinized, and my parents vacillating between unhelpful anger or chastising me for being so trusting and eventually isolating me because i cant be trusted to exist in a public space without being harassed and god i dont want to miss work today and theyre gonna ask why if i had to miss a day and theyre gonna know too. so obviously i shut up. i couldnt say anything. the fuck who assaulted me came, and get this, i went back to his car. i didnt sit next to him, i was sitting at the backseat, and he was angry and yelled at me the entire time while driving me back to the closest bus station. i didnt say anything, and i actually paid him money before leaving. i was a coward.
in hindsight, what happens after the next few month after that was just me trying to compensate for the shame and utter incompetence i felt. i thought i was good at being confrontational and assertive, but when it actually matters, i cant speak. it was awful. i mean, it was a moment of self improvement, i did evolve from being an awkward self-important debate kid to an adult who relies on being good with persuading people for a living. im proud of that. but the feeling of helplessness still remains. im still afraid that when it happens again, i'd just clam up like usual. even though i already successfully fend off several people trying to fuck with me before anything that bad ever happens because im a hot saleswoman now. it felt weird calling myself a victim or a survivor because, it just happens. i didnt survive shit nor do i want to be a victim. i dont want to be pitied. and i dont want to be called brave or anything because im anything but.
except that everytime something reminds me of my sa incident, i kept having this urge to tell somebody, and i'd wrote a long paragraph detailing everything that happened including all of the uncomfortable details that didnt make me look good as a victim. and then i'd delete it before sending because its not good to tell your personal triggers online right? but i have no one i want to talk about this irl. and i cant imagine any well-meaning response that doesnt make me angry. i kept thinking about it. if anyone acknowledged this happens to me, i have no socially acceptable response. im not sure if anyone could understand or be sympathetic. i mean, imagine someone told you a grave secret about them and then they get angry and throw a tantrum when you say youre keeping their secret to the grave. youre in the right to be angry and confused at them. and its one thing to write a retrospective like this, and its another thing talk about it directly. i wouldnt be self aware to control myself. i'd just ruin another friendship because i got pissed off for no discernable reason.
i dont really know where im going with this. i think i just wanted to get this out of my system. its been what? three years? im sick of keeping that shit in. i think i just need to talk about it, sort of like a confessional before moving on for good. anyway, your usual shitposting will resume shortly. bye bitch!
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percyjacksonscookies · 5 months
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dude imma say it
the percy jackson tv show sucks so bad
and I have a lot of time to think at work when im not busy with my little tasks so imma rant about it
because my little brain likes to look for connections i guess
anyway
IT SUCKS SOOOOOO BAAAAAAD HOLY
S H I T
its a giant mix of things because of where we are in time
every major piece of media is a huge reflection of the times we live in so uh
it makes sense that this would suck too like every single other piece of media disney has released in the past decadeish (it comes down to taste so if u like a Disney thing, whatever)
but like?!?!
because of the times we live in where writers had to strike for better wages and a semblance of recognition (i dont know the terms exactly) it makes sense that they gave ol' Ricky boy a shot at screen writing cause they didn't really have to take a chance with a new writer. cause u know disney! wherever there are corners to be cut they will! gotta think of the poor ol' bottom line!!
BUT ALSO RICK RIORDAN'S QUALITY IN WRITING WENT DOWN S O HARD AFTER HIS FIRST SERIES WITH PERCY
heroes of Olympus and trials of Apollo do not have the same flavor as the original series and I know plenty of people will agree with me
and thats cause ol' ricky boy (might call him uncle rick ironically cause I have a big family so its in character of me to have beef with an uncle plus like.... cmon its for the bit, an homage to my cringey younger self, and to help me avoid stupid autocorrect on my phone, it works on so many levels, if u must, cringe away) lost the fucking heart of the original series
lost the whole point and charm of the 1st series
it started out as a fucking bed time story for his son for fucks sake!!!!!! so obviously it was going to be a story built on so much love you could feel it in every word he carefully knit together for his son to feel less alone in the world
and thats why I looked up to him for so many years!!!!
he inspired me to start writing!!! so that maybe some day I could also write stories that helped people feel less alone
because the best fucking stories are the ones with the most heart and genuine emotions you feel like you could be there
but uncle rick fucking lost it because i think after the massive success of his first series he saw it as a way to make money for his family instead of a way to lovingly craft something for the sake of it just existing
yet another thing capitalism has taken from us
I have yet to read his other work, as an adult, because percy jackson is such a comfort book for me and I've obsessively done so much research on it I remember him doing an interview once where he said his students found his other works and they were teasing him about the cuss words in the book because of course they were he taught middle schoolers and that is where he is stronger than I
but thats also another thing
since I haven't read his other works, I dont know if they're going to speak to me like percy jackson has, but probably not from the looks of his other series (ive read all of heroes of Olympus and some of trials of Apollo but thats just cause I adore nico)
but I can definitely say for sure without a shadow of a doubt
dude
uncle rick is NOT a screen writer
he SUCKS at it so bad
he definitely doesn't know how to build suspense in film or write around the obstacles that come with live acting
which is embarrassing man
ive been there
did a senior directed play in high school, wrote the script myself
and it sucked pretty bad
because I was a story teller not a script writer!!!! I didnt know what the fuck i was doing!!!!! whenever I wanted a new character I would just invent one out of thin air, what do you mean I had to have an actor for every new character I have?!?!?!?!
soooo grateful i tried that for the first time in high school cause its not that embarrassing when u suck at something as a teenager cause hey!!! ur learning new shit everyday!!
but this ties back into my point of this show reflecting the times
I will say, I prefer the movie of percy jackson over this weird show
and thats cause it had charm! zest! a screenwriter and people that knew how to make movies!
were at such a weird place in cinema
at least in the mainstream american/western media
I saw everything everywhere all at once last year and it blew my tits clean off
but thats because it was made by people who wanted to make art for arts sake!!!! for the love of creation!!!!!
thats why those movies are so successful now
cause there's really no formula to follow anymore so anything that seems original and made with love is so fucking insanely successful and big corporations can't fucking replicate that without taking chances and letting people tell honest earnest stories
which is why every Disney villain sucks now cause they have to also secretly maybe sometimes be a good person
oh no the circumstances they were given made them a villain
hmmm I wonder who helped with the capitalism of it all?? hmmmm such a mystery
I know we all miss when villains were just evil for fun and that was it
like Ursula, they didn't explain shit about her backstory she was just a woman in a cave that had a reputation and had a sick as hell design and that was all people needed to like her (shout out to divine) (also I don't remember much about the little mermaid I am basing this off of vibes)
where was i going with this.....
anyways the pjo TV show sucks
let Rick Riordan cook longer as a screen writer or let him be a co author of the script my god he sucks at this
get an expert screen writer in there asap phew!!!
today's adhd rant has been brought to you by:
this thing
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