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suuho · 10 months

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Hey Kaz, i really love your thoughts on seventeen. So im wondering if you have any for Vernon's ships? I love that guy so i was surprised to find out that he doesn't really have any popular fic other than verkwan. Which is a pity since he has many interesting dynamic with the other members

first of all, sorry this is so late! life got in the way, yada yada yada, but here we are!! so, huh, vernon ships. why not go by them one by one?

vernon and scoups: i don't have many feelings towards them; they are clearly friends to me, brothers at that, and they get along well enough. i do love that they're the oldest and youngest of their respective units, though. that always makes things fun.

vernon and jeonghan: that is so funny to me, to be honest. they are both such uncanny communicators with opposing energies that i feel like it is partly the reason why we see them so rarely together, just the two of them. interesting dynamic, tho. in, like, theory.

vernon and joshua: rocket line! one of my favorite seventeen units EVER. i honestly think they should do a full duo album, maybe when the members enlist. love that pop punk sound they had going for them on 2 minus 1, but i also love rocket a lot. they fascinate me endlessly, to be honest. i always love to see a new yorker and a californian interact.

vernon and jun: so interesting to me. vernon is super drawn to minghao, so i always find it peculiar when he instead singles out jun or vice versa.

vernon and hoshi: they used to be roommates, which is just insane to me. like, think about that? but in a way, you can tell they were because they get along in a quiet and sensible manner that can only exist because you've shared close quarters with someone, no matter how (un)willingly.

vernon and wonwoo: one of my favorite dynamics in the entire group. they are both extremely introverted, they are the heart and soul of the hip hop dynamic, i love seeing them together because visually they are both just absolutely stunning. i love watching them hang out together. much like wonwoo and jihoon, these two compliment each other really and have a quiet understanding of one another, vernon is just way more laid back than jihoon could ever be. this is two, low energy level individuals interacting with each other, and i love them for it. also, they are bad bitches. to me, anyways.

vernon and jihoon: best friends. my favorite vernon dynamic by FAR. yes, they are both my biases in the group and yes, that does make me indeed biased, but i don't care. vernon is jihoon's closest confidante in terms of song writing and production (besides bumzu ofc), they genuinely get along REALLY well, they have been roommates on tour for ages to this day. jihoon takes care of vernon and vernon understands jihoon. i love them so much, oh my god, like you can just tell that they are very close friends. one of the best friendships in the entire group and i hate that no one pays attention to them. they just love hanging out with each other and i love that for them.

vernon and minghao: oh, whew. verhao... my god, what a can of worms. all i am saying is, that verhao should have and be what verkwan is. in fact, verhao IS what people think verkwan is. vernon is drawn to minghao like a moth to a flame, and minghao loves to play coy with him, while he also takes a lot of care of vernon. idk, i just love them together. maybe the vernon dynamic with the most chemistry.

vernon and mingyu: i love them. i just. i feel like it's hard to explain what i see in them, but whenever they interact, i feel so giddy. there's something special to vernon and mingyu. if you get it, you get it.

vernon and dk: the 218s! i love our 218s. it is so funny, because they have very opposing characters, but it is honestly just a classic mash up of sunshine (dk) and tsundere (vernon), one of the oldest tropes in the books, which we just love. they are both unhinged in different ways. the main rapper and main vocalist of svt, baby!!!

vernon and seungkwan: i mean, do i think that verkwan is overrated? yes. they have none of the romantic chemistry people claim they have and i do absolutely not understand how it survived for this long? what are people seeing here? but, i do love their dynamic as friends. it reminds me of me and my close friends.

vernon and dino: these two just bring me so much joy. i seriously would die for the entire svt maknae line, no joke. and vernon and dino are also unhinged, but in more alike ways. another one of those complex dynamics that doesn't make sense on first glance, but that you feel could be the foundation of something brilliant.

#ask #anon #kaz talks svt #this was fun!!! sorry it took so long

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ascalonianpicnic · 3 years

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so the twisted marionette is back and it seems like a good time for this~ @mystery-salad requested I do an essay on Scarlet and discrimination in STEM so~

Warning: discussions of sexism, racism, and ableism. If I got anything wrong (in terms of real world issues) or was disrespectful in any way about certain subjects please let me know

Hey, let's talk about Scarlet Briar.

More specifically, I wanna talk about Ceara, and how she became Scarlet Briar. Because I'm a gay mathematician and former computer science major, and I think Scarlet is cool.

So let's start here. STEM (science, technology, engineering, and mathematics) is a heavily male dominated set of fields and career paths. A few decades back in the real world, there was this deep set societal belief, at least in western society, that cis women were just "worse" at STEM related things like math and chemistry. It's not as visible of an issue now, but, like I said, STEM fields are still really male dominated, and that's because STEM fields still have a massive issue with sexism. Women have full on left the field due to the sexism they faced in workplaces in just the last decade. Trans women in STEM share really interesting and important personal accounts about how before transitioning, they were treated with respect, offered high level jobs, and entrusted with loads of responsibility, and how post transition, despite having even more experience, are offered significantly lower level jobs, worse pay, and are all around treated like they know less. STEM has a sexism problem.

So, why is this important to Scarlet? Well, her backstory and her life before Omadd's Machine actually tie in to this real world issue in a really fascinating way. It's about Respect. And Scarlet's story is about how she was denied respect over and over, because she was a sylvari, because she was a woman, and because she was neurodivergent. Let's talk about Ceara.

Ceara was a sylvari secondborn, and an engineer from the start. She emerged from the Pale Tree when her race was still brand new to the world and largely unknown. She spent 8 years of her life studying all the Grove had to offer her about mechanics and nature and the universe. She was born curious and as such, was determined to learn everything and anything she could get her hands on. After her time in the Grove, Ceara left, off to find new teachers and extend her knowledge further. After the Grove cane Beigarth, a famed norn smith. He gladly took Ceara under his wing, seeing her genius and potential. For a year, she trained under him, his best student. Then, much to his dismay, she left, feeling she had learned all he could offer about what she wanted to know. She moved south, going to study under iron legion gladium and demolitionist Asagai. Asagai was an old charr, and it took some convincing on Ceara's end, but she eventually took the sylvari in and taught her about gunsmithing and artillery. And after two years, Ceara moved on again, this time heading for Rata Sum and its colleges.

The asura of Rata Sum did Not like Ceara. She had to fight to be allowed to study at the colleges. She won in the end, being admitted into the college of Dynamics. Within a year, she finished the course work, and, feeling like she was finally getting somewhere, she applied again, this time getting admitted to Statics. Two years and two colleges down, at the top of her class both times, Scarlet still wanted more. The Arcane council was curious now if she could keep this streak up, so they let her enter Synergetics. This was what she had been looking for, and she got deep into her studies, taking her time. The Arcane council was unimpressed with her work at best. While not driven from the colleges, she found herself being walked off and looked down on more and more, so she sought other sources. These other sources, both of knowledge and support, came from the inquest, and it wasn't long before she fell in deep. It didn't last, however. When the krewe she was working with ran into trouble, she was abandoned as a scapegoat, and thrown out of the asuran colleges. She wandered on her own for a while, taking the time to study alchemy with the michotl hylek, but mostly keeping to herself. Until Omadd found her, pulled her back into his personal research, and, with her help, built Omadd's machine. Once it was finished, Ceara walked in, and Scarlet walked out.

Sexism in STEM means that people perceived as female are often perceived as knowing or understanding less than they actually do. It's because of this that you'll find young cis male students in STEM classes trying to correct or speak over their female presenting professors. It's why you'll find men at science conferences telling the women presenting for certain topics that they don't seem to understand the topic they're covering or grasp the basics that well, and then recommending or referencing books and research papers written by these women. It means that women will often be overlooked for internships, research positions, and grants. And that is the sort of thing Scarlet faced as a young woman trying to learn everything she could. She had to work for the apprenticeships she could get, and with Beigarth, despite how highly he thought of her, she had to work harder to prove she was ready for more each step of the way. Finding anyone to teach her at all among the charr was a struggle, until an older woman took her in. And no one in Rata Sum took her seriously.

There was more than just the fact that Scarlet was a woman at play with Rata Sum though. As stated, STEM has a bad sexism problem. But that's not all. STEM isn't just mostly men, but also mostly white men, and as such, the fields have a bit of a racism problem as well. Personally, I can only speak so much to this as I myself am white, have never faced racism, and never will face racism. I do know that the intelligence, skill, and effort of people of color goes largely unacknowledged. They will be denied the same opportunities and respect that their white peers receive, and their work and contributions will be ignored, exploited, and stolen.

Racism in Tyria isn't the same as it is in the real world, though it is still present there, and prevalent. And it is something Scarlet has to face and struggle with repeatedly as a sylvari. The sylvari are young and new to Tyria. Because of this, the other prominent groups all tend to think of sylvari as innocent, ignorant, and overly naive. The asura are especially bad about this. They already think of themselves as the smartest of Tyria's inhabitants, above everyone else. And when they first encounter the sylvari, the asura refuse to believe this new group could even be sentient. So, when 11 year old Ceara shows up at the colleges, the Arcane Council and the asura in general doubt she could possibly understand asuran studies. She's a sylvari, after all, and just a girl on top of that. There's surely no way she could keep up.

So when this young sylvari girl finishes at the top of her class in just a year, not once but twice, the Arcane council is intrigued. They don't respect her. They don't hold her work in high esteem. But they do want to know if this is some sort of fluke or if she can do it again. So she's admitted into the third and final college, and when she gets caught up in her studies, genuinely interested and invested in what she's learning and wanting to take her time to take it all in, the Council is disappointed. Never mind that Scarlet has already done what no other non-asura has. She took too long doing what she loved, learning, so the Council dismisses her, and dismisses her hard work. Her theories are looked down upon and ignored, and she is left with only support from Omadd, who can use her and her theories for his own gain, and the inquest. Omadd and the inquest make her feel valued and respected. The inquest let's her try anything she wants, it lets her really explore the fields of study she's most drawn to. The inquest makes sure to profit off her hard work and, when it comes down to it, the inquest leaves her to take the fall for everything. It's easy, after all, to pin the blame on someone already so looked down on by the society she's in. Scarlet is kicked out of the colleges and the city. She loses her access to information, her belongings, and even her own research and findings. All her hard work, taken from her because the inquest was more than glad to use a sylvari.

And then of course, there's Omadd. He was glad to have Scarlet as a lab assistant, and endlessly fascinated by and supportive of her work. So once she's gone from Rata Sum, he leaves too, taking her research and starting on his own personal project. He gets stuck, he seeks Scarlet out, and he convinces her to help him again. Once Scarlet is back on board, the project goes smoothly and the two construct Omadd's Machine. Omadd's. Despite being built off Scarlet's theories and research, despite her being integral to the construction of this machine, it's Omadd's and it carries his name. Funny how that happens, isn't it? And once the machine is up and running, he thinks Scarlet should test it first. Who knows what could happen in there, better to leave it up to the assistant to try it out, and frame it as her getting the honor of the first try. As we all know, it goes poorly. Scarlet learns so much more, all the knowledge she had been seeking for over a decade, but in return, the seeds of Mordremoth are planted in her mind and slowly take over, destroying her.

Now Scarlet, who has been used and devalued and disrespected and infantilized every step of the way, her whole life, is going to start tearing down the things that held her back for so long. She just needs a plan, and with the help of a certain sleeping dragon, one begins to form.

There's something I glossed over earlier that is so important to note, and that's how Scarlet was treated in the Grove. Now, it's been stated explicitly by Scott McGough, a narrative designer for the fame, that Scarlet emerged with lacking empathy. Low empathy doesn't make Scarlet, or anyone, a bad person. It's sometimes a symptom of autism, as well as some personality disorders, and it does affect how Scarlet is treated. As an autistic person myself, Scarlet very much reads as autistic to me, between low empathy, a one track mind, and an intense special interest in the universe and its mechanics. She has a hard time connecting with others, is easily bored by subjects that don't relate back to her special interest, can focus intently on and get caught up in her work, and doesn't really get social graces or expectations. Regardless of any diagnosis she would have if she existed in our world, Scarlet is treated differently due to her low empathy, a trait she cannot help about herself.

From the moment she emerges in the Grove, she is treated differently. She is talked down to. Her desire to take in her first sights and how it overwhelms her is dismissed as overconfidence and rudeness. Her own brother, barely older than her, talks like he knows so much more than her. Scarlet is an outsider among her own people. How does it feel to have low empathy among a race connected to each other deeply through empathy? Probably not great. Her studies in the Grove are limited, she is treated as rude and prideful for wanting to be independent and needing space. Rather than being accommodated, rather than being understood, Scarlet is infantilized, dismissed, and disregarded. She isn't neurotypical. She was born different. She's punished for it.

When she emerges from Omadd's Machine, made from her own hard work and creativity, Scarlet Briar is a young woman who has frequently been overlooked and rarely understood. All these thoughts and ideas, all this passion, and the only people who have ever even seemed to understand her have used and betrayed her so thoroughly. Scarlet Briar has always had to look out for and take care of herself, as a woman, as a sylvari, as someone who is neurodivergent and is in a field that doesn't respect a single aspect of her identity. The world won't accommodate her and the world won't take her seriously. So why shouldn't she show the world what she can do? Why not force everyone to recognize her for who she is? Why not give in just a little to that voice that has been calling to her in her nightmares since she left the machine? After all, it promises power and recognition and a sense of belonging.

#gw2 #guild wars 2 #scarlet briar #my essays #anyway uvu

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spockandawe · 4 years

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I’m so unbelievably weak against characters who make terrible choices because they’re hurting and upset. I love the subtler resentful decisions that quietly build up ill will, and I love the big dramatic choices that end with everyone going down in flames. But more than anything, I love love love hurting myself with the emotional flavor of a character struggling with the tension of simultaneously realizing that people hate/mistrust them (or how much people hate/mistrust them, or which people hate/mistrust them), while also realizing that those people just have... no idea where they’re coming from.

I was thinking about this first because of Mu Qing, who is honestly a very low-key version of this scenario (and it’s also quieter since he’s not a lead character and rarely takes the spotlight himself). But the first big tgcf flashback honestly made my heart ache, seeing him trying to walk a line between maintaining his own independence/pride and not belonging to someone he wants to be peers with, but when he tries to be tactful, people decide he’s being shady. He was picking cherries, to bring a treat to his poor mother (and the poor children around his home), but then got accused of stealing, and then didn’t want to say that it was because his only remaining parent was living in poverty. And it continues through the present day! He knocks out Feng Xin so he can save him from a burning city, because Feng Xin refuses to leave, and people are like ‘>:OOO MU QING ATTACKED FENG XIN??’ In some ways, this character hurts me more than the others, because he rarely does anything wrong, he has a bad attitude, but his most significant “missteps” tend to be like ‘you could have been a little more kind, tbh.’

But also too, I’ve been working my way through the svsss extras again, and... Shen Jiu. God, Shen Jiu. This character is agonizing, and I love him so much. He makes terrible choices! He does terrible things! He tries to set up an actual literal child to die horribly, because he resents that this child had a parent who loved him, and that he found his way to Cang Qiong young enough to reach his full potential! It’s absolutely unforgivable! But nobody except Yue Qingyuan has any clue how much Shen Jiu has been through and how to possibly help him grow or heal or how to support him into better decision making. And Shen Jiu is so hurt by the way Yue Qingyuan left him that he refuses to let Yue Qingyuan help him now. Like! This child was a slave, begging for food on the streets, then was sold to a rich boy who abused him in sexually-flavored ways and planned to marry him to his sister so he could keep him forever, and then his “rescuer” was a scumbag adult who taught him to steal and murder.

And while Shen Jiu was suffering, he thinks Yue Qingyuan, who came from the same beginning and who promised to come back for him, was living in careless pampered luxury in a prestigious cultivation sect. Shen Jiu’s own self-evaluations are incredibly harsh, from the moment he’s reunited with Yue Qingyuan. He calls himself terrible, he calls himself a thing, and once it’s clear that he’s going to pay the price for his bad decisions, he tries hard to shove away the one person who cares about him and find some way to protect him. Yue Qingyuan never stopped loving him and defending him, but literally nobody else in the world has any sympathy for him whatsoever. How am I not supposed to be heartbroken? Shang Qinghua sighs over how his readers used to hate on Shen Qingqiu for having no motivations, which, sure, that’s understandable from what’s on the “Proud Immortal Demon Way” pages, but seeing the trauma driving his choices in svsss and seeing his own self-awareness and self-loathing and knowing that one (1) person in-universe has any inkling of his internal world (and that person died trying to help him), I’m! In pain!!!

Plus, in svsss proper, I saw a post in passing once that was something like... ‘readers are hard on luo binghe, because he’s the only mxtx protagonist where we see the worst decisions of his life and aren’t in his head to understand why he’s making those decisions.’ Which I still find fascinating, and think about often. It makes sense to me. And as far as my terrible-decision-making children go, he’s very interesting to me because he doesn’t really deal with the widespread distaste/mistrust that mu qing and shen jiu experience, it’s very much targeted on one person. I live for the parts of svsss where all Luo Binghe has to do is breathe, and Shen Qingqiu flinches and bolts. And Luo Binghe is not acting in kind or well-considered ways, a lot of the time! But he was seventeen, and his beloved teacher had told him that ‘humans can be good or evil, demons can be good or evil,’ but the moment Luo Binghe turned out to be half demon, even though he’d just been fighting desperately trying to protect Shen Qingqiu, that teacher he trusted more than anything immediately turned on him, stabbed him in the chest, and threw him into hell.

That’s agonizing!!!! Even without the aftermath, that’s agonizing to read! And when Luo Binghe comes back, years later, he’s upset, he’s hurt, he’s lonely, he’s still stinging from that betrayal, of course he’s not making good decisions. I follow good blogs, because I haven’t seen any terrible Luo Binghe takes on my dash, but I’m kind of :c that these takes apparently exist. Again, it’s not that I think he makes good decisions, but I can see why he makes bad decisions, and I can see other characters missing that context, and I am rolling in terrible, glorious pain. Luo Binghe shows up secretly in Huan Hua Palace and starts taking it over and generally acts shady as heck? Well, Shizun wouldn’t let him beg for forgiveness when he was a disciple, and he’s afraid to face Shen Qingqiu until he can meet him on a semi-equal footing. Luo Binghe gets angry and spiteful when Shen Qingqiu asks if he’s responsible for the sowers? Yes he does! He’d always, always tried to do right by Shen Qingqiu, and trusted Shen Qingqiu when he said demons could be decent people, but the moment he turned out to be half-demon, Shen Qingqiu immediately started expecting the worst from him at every turn. It hurts! I don’t blame him for acting on that hurt! And I am so endlessly compelled by the way that Shen Qingqiu completely fails to recognize the context for where Binghe is coming from.

And like... I cannot leave out Xue Yang and Jin Guangyao. Xue Yang is fascinating in his own way, because the steps are... a lot more explicit and clear-cut than some of these other characters. Shen Jiu’s downward spiral is very internal and he curls up tight to hide his weak spots even with the person who values him most in the whole world, but Xue Yang very plainly tries to lay out his reasoning for his most important person. His whole world is crumbling by the time things reach that point, and it was probably beyond salvaging, but god! He tries so hard to explain the position the world placed him in, from childhood onward, helpless and vulnerable, and that nobody was going to defend him except himself.

But when Xiao Xingchen doesn’t understand what he’s trying to communicate, when he realizes that the person he values most isn’t willing to hear what he’s trying to say, he starts lashing out again and trying to hurt. It’s the same lesson he learned when he was young, in some ways. ‘If I’m stupid enough to trust you, you’re going to use that to hurt me.’ And then the logical next step, ‘If you’re going to hurt me, all I can do is try to hurt you worse.’ You can see the trauma playing out right there on the page, and it’s agonizing. I can understand some people not enjoying reading things that make them hurt that way, but I have trouble Getting it when people don’t at least find that kind of dynamic compelling as hell. I’ll sometimes avoid media that I know is going to make me sad, but if I’m in the mood to Experience Sadness, I know a dynamic like this is going to grab me by the heart and shake me like a ragdoll.

And... Jin Guangyao. He was on my mind too, partly because I’ve seen a few takes on his motivations lately that honestly kind of baffle me? Like, to each their own, especially since mdzs never takes us inside his head. But I see posts that like... he was bullying Nie Mingjue, or what if Lan Xichen could Tell he was never genuine and mistrusted him on some level, and how to put this. It’s not that I agree with the choices he made, though I really don’t want to play fandom purity police in any way, shape, or form (murder is good, actually), but I understand the choices he made enough that those sort of interpretations that skew towards the cruelty-for-the-sake-of-cruelty territory honestly kind of upset me.

There’s some interesting comparisons to be made with Mu Qing, in some ways. They both grew up poor, without a father, in “shameful” single-parent situations (a sex worker mother vs. a father being executed for being a criminal). They were poor boys with ambition, but no matter how they tried to carry themselves with dignity, those poor beginnings were rubbed in their faces, years after the fact. I think it does make a real difference that Mu Qing’s shame is mostly based in his own history (sweeping floors) while Jin Guangyao’s is more external (son of a whore), and that Jin Guangyao’s also insulted a parent who he loved dearly, and that Mu Qing was seeking the respect outside of famiial structures while Jin Guangyao was desperate to be accepted by his father.

There’s so much of Jin Guangyao’s early life that’s like ‘I’m Just Trying To Live My Life, My Dude,’ and it hurts me to watch. He really didn’t have goals that were all that excessive! If his goals were excessive in some way, it’s only by virtue of how highly ranked his father was, which isn’t his fault. His goal: ‘I want my father to accept me into the family.’ What the world saw: “oh my god, this son of a whore SERIOUSLY wants to be brought into this noble family, lmaooooo.’ There are characters who are more compassionate than that, and a lot of that reaction is down to the nature of the setting, but LORD, man! It’s honestly a pretty restrained goal for a kid to have! Especially when his father totally promised to come back for him someday, and he waited patiently for years before setting out on his own.

And even once he gets kicked down the steps of Koi Tower and dials back his ambitions, he gets so little space to breathe. He’s learning cultivation late, he takes a position as a nobody in a different cultivation sect, he’s just trying to live. But no matter how he rolls with the punches, no matter how he smiles and bears it, he’s being constantly, constantly prodded in that old, painful bruise. I’ve been finally working my way through The Untamed, and it was painful to watch, in Gusu, when he’s trying to present the Nie Sect’s gift to Lan QIren, and people just start focking gossiping about him, right there, perfectly audibly. And when we see him back in Qinghe, he’s perfectly polite and deferential, and that one disciple is still like ‘fuck you, ur mom was a whore.’

He makes bad decisions, but even when he makes good decisions, he can’t win. I don’t get anything from him at all that suggests he had Hugely Lofty Ambitions from a young age, he just wanted some kind of decent life, but almost nobody would cut him a break. Nie Mingjue did cut him a break, and Lan Xichen was gentle and kind to him, and that made such an impact on him. But I also think it made it that much worse, when he made later questionable decisions, and Nie Mingjue refused to let him explain himself. Nie Mingjue’s rigidity breaks my heart in lots of ways, but especially when it comes to Jin Guangyao. I don’t want to make this all about personal attachment, but it’s kind of inescapable in this situation. Nie Mingjue sends him a loud, violent message that if he’s not perfectly morally upright, he’s Done. But by now, Jin Guangyao has years of history of people being cruel to him based on a history he never was able to control. Nie Mingjue protected him, but hes made it clear that protection was... conditional. There could be arguments about how conditional, and what the non-murdery limits would have been, but the murder has been done, and it was already clear that Nie Mingjue never had the power to protect him from everything.

I can’t read Jin Guangyao’s later actions without also reading that fear and insecurity into his decisions. He even tries to say it outright, that he’s afraid of everyone and everything, and Nie Mingjue misses the point. Jin Guangyao hurts me a lottle, because he suffers both in terms of the general public’s judgment of him, but also in the judgment of someone he cared deeply about. I can see the reasoning and trauma, but so many other people in the story can’t. Jin Guangyao gets pushed to the edge by how his father holds him at arm’s length from the family, the atrocities he tells Jin Guangyao to commit on his behalf (and then maybe I’ll treat you like my actual son, maybe), but when he tries to express that, Nie Mingjue is like ‘can’t you just endure more, though??’ He builds a temple with a statue with the face of his dead beloved mother, and the public is like ‘omg, he made that statue with his OWN FACE, can you believe it??’

In some ways, the way Lan Xichen determinedly loves and trusts him makes it all hurt even worse. I absolutely believe Jin Guangyao when he says that he never once wanted to act against Lan Xichen. So many of the terrible decisions Jin Guangyao makes tie so directly to him seeking either safety or security. But he works hard in social gatherings to keep the peace and people think he’s two-faced. He endures years of mistreatment before hitting back and people judge him for hitting back at all and say that well, what else could we have respected from someone with that background. Nie Mingjue threatens to kill him multiple times, and he was a very straightforward, honest man, of course Jin Guangyao was frightened of him and decided it was safer to see him dead. I live for the pain of seeing a character I love make decisions I strongly disagree with, understanding why they’re making those decisions, and seeing other characters not understand, and simply hate them for the decisions.

This isn’t exactly new, this is why I’ll never be able to shake my love for Starscream, even if his quality of motivation... varies by continuity. And Pharma and Prowl are two of my favorite characters in all of idw1 for exactly this reason. I’ve got at least three fics brushing up against Pharma’s resentment over ‘yes, i got ordered to run a hospital on a garbage planet I was sharing the most violent, sadistic decepticons in existence, I SURE WONDER WHY I WAS DRIVEN TO THIS DESPERATE POINT, BUT THE LOVE OF MY LIFE THINKS I’M JUST A TERRIBLE PERSON, SO I GUESS THAT’S THAT.’

And in the murderbot books, I genuinely get reduced to tears when murderbot has to deal with people compassionately interpreting its behavior instead of giving it no credit, the way its used to. I find the raksura books intensely, intensely satisfying in how Moon struggles to fit into a highly social, close-knit society after growing up so traumatized and alone, and how his colony gradually adapts to him and gets used to his quirks, instead of driving him out, the way he’s experienced so many times. No real conclusion here, I was just spacing out during a work training call, and got overtaken by how much I love characters who experience this particular flavor of emotional isolation.

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g-perla · 3 years

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The ACOTAR Series is a Romantic/Gothic Horror Stage and Only Nesta Got the Memo

Not even SJM knows what’s going on.

Ok, this is going to seem off the rails but bear with me.

So I'm a big fan of Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë (top 5 books and all that jazz) and I was thinking about it because it deals with themes of the Other and the supernatural, Nature as Character, the overlap of the animalistic and human, blurring of established binaries...fun, Romantic shit like that. Interestingly, this overlaps with how SJM illustrates her world and characters a lot of the time, hence why I was considering it while working on my Nesta project. I’ve mentioned before that Nesta really gives me Byronic heroine vibes and that’s a character construct of precisely this literary tradition.

I started thinking about Heathcliff and Cathy and how they're ridiculously extra and just feel the most intense emotions towards each other but also towards literally everything (nothing half-assed ever, this is a Romantic novel after all). I then remembered how so many people ship them, but like in earnest, in a totally aspirational way. It's not a #cursed ship to them at all. It's...romantic to them not Romantic. I even read often that people quote it at their weddings, specifically the infamous "two souls" quote.

Then I had an epiphany. I was like "wait, what if SJM is one of those people?? What if she has the energy of a Cathy/Heathcliff earnest shipper and that's why all her ships are messy??" Because if that is the case, my friends, oh boy oh boy would it explain so much. I will post some sections from Wuthering Heights:

Doesn’t the acotar series seem like a 1/50 dilution of that energy?? And that is barely a taste of all the spiciness this book has to offer. To illustrate further: SJM gave us the F/eysand suicide pact and the near-death battlefield Nessian scene. One is certainly more outlandish than the other, but both are the result of intense emotions. To that Emily Brontë raises the following: Heathcliff asking the sexton to dig up Cathy’s grave to see what’s up because her ghost has been haunting him since he personally dug up her grave 18 years prior and she has been haunting him ever since. He later demands to be buried in the same exact grave when he dies so they can decompose together. They both married other people though which only adds to the mess. (I am not lying to you the Romantic tradition really gave us these gems lmao. As an aside, Mary Shelley was also a writer of the Romantic tradition and she confessed her love to husband Percy Bysshe Shelley on her mother’s grave. Her mother was liberal feminist icon Mary Wollstonecraft by the way which only makes this even more amazing. Additionally, biographers believe that the Shelleys also had sex there. Talk about Romantic 😉.)

Then I had ANOTHER thought! (Dangerous)

If we read the series from the point of view of just another YA high fantasy things might get a bit boring because the world-building is honestly lazy and the magic system is pretty soft, which isn’t a pre-requisite in high fantasy (The Lord of the Rings has a soft magic system) but it's not the norm and it doesn't pay off in this series. Not to mention that the plot is pretty lackluster and derivative. To add to that the romantic and sexual relationships are questionable in their healthiness and consequently are the source of much argument in the fandom.

But, dear reader, if we think about the ACOTAR series as being a sort of thematic and ideological 21st century YA homage to the Romantic tradition of the 19th century (within which Gothic Horror also lives), things get REALLY, REALLY SPICY.

No longer do we just have a romance fantasy with messy, hyper-emotional, animalistic characters who constantly partake in morally grey situations rife with dubious dynamics. No longer does plot really matter. No longer do we require quasi-scientific descriptions of the world and the magical system. No! All that matters now are the characters and the mood. Now we have potential! Add a lot of Nature ambiance: expanses of dark woods, great mountains, the unknowable and sublime energy of the ocean, a violent rainstorm/hurricane/tsunami, an impending snowstorm whose intensity reflects the growing emotional intensity of the characters as the story goes along (I’m looking at you impending snowstorm in acofas that curiously matches the growing complexity of Nesta’s emotional state). Blur the lines between any imaginable category: life and death, human and animal, known and unknown, Self and Other, beautiful and monstrous, good and evil, masculine and feminine, the list goes on. Most importantly make your readers uncomfortable by frustrating their desires to sort things into easy binary categories and don’t apologise for making them question their assumptions about the world, morality, gender, and any other kind of previously constructed Order.

Basically write the story with Dionysus-in-a-Greek-tragedy energy and bring to us mere mortals artful Chaos.

Once that is done we can have a literal Romantic/Gothic Horror story. The Acotar series could have been this unapologetically, with the added element of being told through the eyes of the "Cathy" character instead of through the lens of a third person getting second-hand accounts about what went on. This whole series is honestly enough of a chaotic mess of Byronic-like heroes and heroines and cursed familial relationships that it could have been that. That alone is peak entertainment. The problem, however, and the main reason why I can’t really say that this series truly delivered this wackiness is that SJM committed the act of not fully committing to the bit (very un-Romantic of her, I know). Now, I am not saying that SJM actually intended this. I’m just saying it really could have accidentally been this genius with some tweaks. Unfortunately, she made the crucial mistake of trying to justify too much, trying to make things too neat, too tidy, too sensical (in other words: the reason we really can’t have nice things).

I could end this here, lamenting the potential of what SJM had set-up for us were it not for one element, one gift:

Nesta

OHOHOHO DO THINGS GET GOOD HERE SO BUCKLE UP

Most of the characters refuse to fully commit to the bit in their desire to satisfy modern sensibilities, by which I of course mean they want ridiculous things like political power, to conquer lands, to be a Girl Boss, to get married, have kids, celebrate holidays, converse about mundane things, be relatable, etc. You know, pretty pedestrian stuff that only requires a bit of genetic luck, a sprinkle of energy, and the right circumstances within the world of Acotar. I would like to reiterate the beginning of this paragraph: most of the characters.

Let’s say you’re stubborn and you decide to still read the series through the lens of the Romantic/Gothic tradition, what happens then?

The most hilarious thing (for the Nesta stans that is. The antis would probably hate this)

Nesta, based on what we know about her through Feyre and the limited amount of other scenes, is the only character who really takes the performance seriously. She's the only one that SJM hasn't managed to confine through justification. Nesta just shows up and simply refuses to make sense (her POWER what a queen 👑). She is endlessly fascinating because she just exists in her world on her terms, established categories be damned, and in this manner she frustrates not only the sensibilities of the characters in the stories but those of the reader as well. This double duty is, I suggest, the result of the other characters not fully inhabiting the nebulous world of Romantic characters and thus being a little too plausible and understandable even if they are not justifiable.

Ok, you may say, but I relate so much to Nesta. I do understand her. I don’t justify all of her actions, but I understand where she is coming from. (You’re not alone, friend. I like to think these things too. Alas, we are but plebs).

To that I reply; Nesta does things, certainly, and we can spend hours trying to explain through extrapolation, educated guesses, and personal experience why she did those things, but the fact is we really don't know why. We are never explicitly told. Our insight into who she is and her motivations comes predominantly from the understanding of her youngest sister and from our own interpretation of the actions she takes. I must make clear that our own interpretations are rooted in pre-established assumptions about what is sensical and orderly in our own world and in our own lives. We cannot interpret with the tools available to us that which may be, by definition, unfathomable. It is simply paradoxical. Nesta, as we currently know her, is a construct derived from a limited number of scenes and our interpretations and projections of these scenes. Even the scenes where we get third person narration don’t explicitly tell us her motivations and her logic. For all we know there really is no comprehensible reason for her actions and that is endlessly amusing to me in how utterly Romantic it is. Acosf may and likely will change this of course, but as it stands, Nesta is a whole Romantic character. Her divisiveness in fandom and in the narrative could be due in part to her refusal to fit the discrete categories available in her world and ours.

Isn’t that wonderful?

To illustrate this a bit more I will share some details SJM gives us about her/ elements she sets up that fit in with the characteristics of the Romantic tradition (these are not exhaustive by any means):

The absolute pettiness (and extra-ness) of being so angry at her father’s inaction that she is willing to starve to death to see if he does something.

How in Acowae she is described as shifting between emotions as if she were changing clothes and feeling everything too strongly (probably to the point of destruction)

She is constantly being compared to animals, even when she is still human. Granted, SJM compares everyone to animals, but that strengthens the blurring of lines between usually discrete categories. It is still most powerful when used as a comparison when she is human because it dehumanises Nesta.

Often, SJM describes her characters as forces. Forces of nature, for example. Acofas is full of details like this in relation to Nesta. There is a storm brewing leading up to the solstice party and it is in full swing when she arrives at the townhouse. The language used there suggests that Nesta herself may be the storm (against the onslaught of Nesta). It really adds to the Maleficent energy tbh.

She is often associated with death post her transformation

She is Other even to Others. She was Made like Elain, Feyre, and Amren in a sense, but the process of her specific transformation differentiates her greatly from the others. As it is, she doesn’t fit in anywhere

Her intense attachment to her femininity and its expression are at odds with the ideas and assumptions about the performance of womanhood and a woman’s role in her world and even in ours. She is unapologetically feminine in her physical presentation, but her character, her thoughts, and possibly even desires transgress the unwritten rules of acceptable femininity (unfortunately there still are abject expressions of femininity in our ‘”progressive” mileux

She displays in many of her actions a disrespect towards authority and to the status quo. This is particularly notable when her intensely polarised sense of right and wrong is aggravated.

Her self-destructiveness. This is referred to most strongly in Acofas, but I would say she was remarkably blasé about self-preservation in Acowar as well

She is described as intelligent, cunning, ruthless, attractive, and prone to debilitating extremes of emotionality. All of these are characteristics of Byronic heroes, a subtype of the Romantic hero

Here are a bunch of quotes that touch on many of the elements that I have discussed above:

“I looked at my sister, really looked at her, at this woman who couldn’t stomach the sycophants who now surrounded her, who had never spent a day in the forest but had gone into wolf territory...Who had shrouded the loss of our Mother, then our downfall, because the anger had been a lifeline, the cruelty a release. But she had cared--beneath it she had cared, and perhaps loved more fiercely than I could comprehend, more deeply and loyally.”

--Acotar, emphasis mine, note the strong emotions. This is a recurring element for Nesta.

“Cassian’s face went almost feral. A wolf who had been circling a doe...Only to find a mountain cat wearing its hide instead.”

--Acomaf, animal comparison

“Nesta is different from most people,” I explained. “She comes across as rigid and vicious, but I think it’s a wall. A shield--like the ones Rhys has in his mind.” “Against what?” “Feeling. I think Nesta feels everything--sees too much; sees and feels it all. And she burns with it. Keeping that wall up helps from being overwhelmed, from caring too greatly.”

--Acomaf, emphasis mine

“I knew that she was different [...] Nesta was different [...] as if the Cauldron in making her...had been forced to give more than it wanted. As if Nesta had fought after she went under, and had decided that if she was to be dragged into hell, she was taking the Cauldron with her.”

--Acomaf, Nesta had her own plans for the Cauldron what a queen

“Something great and terrible.”

--Acowar, referring to her eyes. Oooh, spooky Nesta 👻

“The day she was changed, she...I felt something different with her [...] like looking at a house cat and suddenly finding a panther standing there instead.”

--Acowar, a two in one here: difference + animal comparison. Boy does SJM really go heavy when establishing Nesta as Other.

“‘Not in flesh, not in the thing that prowls beneath our skin and bones...’ Amren’s remarkable eyes narrowed. ‘But...I see the kernel, girl.’ Amren nodded, more to herself than anyone. ‘You did not fit--the mold that they shoved you into. The path you were born upon and forced to walk. You tried, and yet you did not, could not fit. And then the path changed.’ A little nod. ‘I know--what it is to be that way. I remember it, long ago as it was.’

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’“

--Acowar, show don’t tell gets thrown out the window here, but it is useful for the present purposes

“What if I tell you that the rock and darkness and sea beyond whispered to me, Lord of Bloodshed? How they shuddered in fear, on that island across the sea. How they trembled when she emerged. She took something--something precious. She ripped it out with her teeth. What did you wake that day in Hybern, Prince of Bastards?

What came out was not what went in [...] How lovely she is, new as a fawn and yet ancient as the sea. How she calls to you. A queen as my sister once was. Terrible and proud; beautiful as a winter’s sunrise.”

--Acowar, who knew rocks, darkness, and the sea were such gossips, but look how many connections to nature! To be compared to the sea, a significant example of the sublime, is peak Romanticism. If any of you have read Moby Dick, think about what the ocean and the white whale might have represented there and how that might relate to Nesta.

“I think the power is death--death made flesh.”

--Acowar, Feyre referring to the possible nature of Nesta’s power. Alluding to her powers possibly being related to death is quite significant because that is something most of us cannot comprehend, nor can most of the characters. For Nesta, a “reborn” but very much living character to have death associated with her is a strong blurring of the lines. The case of her being labelled a witch is similarly significant as it solidifies the elements of the supernatural while simultaneously comparing her to pretty much the only exclusively female-coded monster in western pop culture. I will touch more on this when I do my study of Nesta through the framework of Barbara Creed’s Monstrous Feminine.

“I am not like the others.”

--Acowar, we love a self-aware queen.

“Nesta took in his broken body, the pain in Cassian’s eyes, and angled her head.

The movement was not human.

Not fae.

Purely animal.

Purely predator.”

--Acowar

There are a lot more details and quotes that support this interpretation, but I didn’t write them all down in my archived notes. This post is obscenely long, however, so even though there is more to be said, I’ll leave it for another day. If you made it this far you really are an MVP and probably love Nesta to a concerning degree like me. Please rest your eyes if you’re actually reading this 😂

I’d love to read about any other takes and thoughts that might have come to your minds after reading this monstrosity,

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thevalleyisjolly · 4 years

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cumulous for the character asks? 💛

I want you to know how much I love you right here and right now <3

favorite thing about them

*cracks knuckles* Get ready for the Cumulous Appreciation Manifesto! I have so much love for this funky little pastel death monk, and here it is:

He’s such a subtle and complex character! There are so many elements to Cumulous that seem contradictory at first: he’s very practical and actionable (meta perspective: Zac’s respect for the game) but also deliberately makes time for those character moments of connection (see: spending hours crying on the ship with Theo over Lazuli, having that talk with Ruby after Jet’s funeral). On many levels, he’s a typical tough war guy (the whole bit with Joren and the crossbow bolt and “That is absolutely badass”), but it’s not central to who he is, it’s not an identity that he struggles with like Amethar or Liam. When the war is over, he can put it down and be gentle and value softness, and it’s like Liam recognizing that a war guy is something you do, not something you are. Then there’s the whole Order of the Spinning Star, which I wish we’d gotten to learn more about, because they are all about protecting Candia’s magic and where does that drive come from? What motivated him to join the Order, why is he so dedicated to this cause and to Lazuli? And then how he's so intense and focused on his goals, but also so supportive of the other characters at the same time. Deliberately making the time to talk with Ruby about Jet, not talking about guilt or vengeance or hollow comfort, but about Ruby’s life and reaffirming her agency at a time when she felt despair and only saw one way forward; pledging loyalty to Saccharina with full enthusiasm when everyone else was still hesitant and following through on that by being willing to die (and very nearly dying) for her; going to support Amethar when he went to take on Calroy- this funky little pastel monk just wants to support his party and he will go at it with 110%.

least favorite thing about them

A meta complaint, and understandable considering that he came into the game later, but how much of his character and character arc had to be pushed to the background (curse you LA fire inspector and your perfectly reasonable if character-frustrating requirements for fire safety!)

favorite line

His entire conversation with Ruby on the ship, but especially:

“I know that I’ve seen the insides of all these bodies with the wet sacks and the weird bones that they have inside of them, but I know that there is something in there that is not there.”

and

“You say that you’re dead, but I think you should also consider staying here with the living. ‘Cause we will all die, but you don’t have to do it just yet.”

brOTP

I am here for the Cumulous and Liam dynamic, and the complexities of being seed guys and war guys

OTP

Ardent Cumulous/Theo shipper, ever since Episode 8 in the middle of the battle when Theo gets into the rowboat, Cumulous says “I like your sword,” Theo responds “I like your whole vibe,” and then Cumulous pauses and gives the softest, most amazed “Wow” with a disbelieving smile on his face, and that’s all I needed, thank you very much

nOTP

I don’t think I’ve seen a single Cumulous ship in the whole time I’ve been here, so rarely enough, no nOTPs yet!

random headcanon

Lighthearted headcanon, since I just wrote the Cumulous Manifesto above: He’s great with animals, and especially dragons. He would love to have a full time dragon living at the monastery in the new Candia, and only the fact that even the nicest dragons are not tame dragons is stopping him from extending an invitation. In lieu of dragons, he keeps a coop of chickens, who might not be as big or as dangerous as dragons, but who have much the same chaotic temperament.

unpopular opinion

Being a secondary character does not make him any less of a character. Just because he’s not Lapin 2.0 doesn’t mean he’s not as developed as a character. Just because he comes in after Lapin dies does not mean he should die so that Lapin can come back (a frequent take that particularly irks me: people don’t have to like Cumulous or want him around, but they can respect that some fans do and not maintag posts where they wish he dies so that Lapin can return).

song i associate with them

The Call, by Regina Spektor, although I remain endlessly fascinated by how quickly and confidently Zac answered “Shallow” when asked about a song he associated with Cumulous

favorite picture of them

I love this fanart by @criticalrolo so much, it is my phone wallpaper and sometimes I turn on my phone just to look at it for a while because it is so beautiful.

#thats-the-moon-grey #thank you so much sola!#i love this monk so much he lives rent free in my head 24/7 #cumulous rocks

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a-silent-symphony · 4 years

Text

Nightwish's Floor Jansen: the music that changed my life

Nightwish singer Floor Jansen celebrates the music that lit her path into symphonic metal

The Gathering - Mandylion

"This album was the reason I started to form the idea in my brain that I could sing in a metal band. There‘s a song on it called Strange Machines and it got played on the radio when was I starting to get interested in metal.

"It was combination of that style of female vocals and heavy guitars. Anna Van Giersbergen’s voice was just … wow to me and hearing her sing on that kind of music, I was like, ‘Yeah that’s what I want.’ For me, an interest in female singers started with Anna Van Giersbergen and with Mandylion."

Joseph And the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat

"This was life changing because it made me aware that I could sing. It was a musical that we held at our high school, and I was in it. I must have been 12. There were actual auditions and I participated, wanting the role of the narrator which was one of the main roles and one of the characters who sings by far the most. And I got it, even though I shared the position with two other girls.

"All of a sudden, I realised I can sing. I was the teased child, but in that group, I found I could be myself. Only recently, I was reunited with the two teachers that were behind the whole thing. It was fantastic to meet them again and I wondered, if they hadn’t spent so much time investing time in us to make music, who knows if I would have found out that I wanted to sing, that I can sing and that I’m a born performer?

"I was the great mouse as a child. I was the odd one. Why would I want to be onstage? But as soon as I was on it, I belonged there."

Pantera - Vulgar Display Of Power and Machine Head - Burn My Eyes

"Pantera and Machine Head were the two bands that got me into metal. I must have heard things before that when I was listening to grunge, but it was way too heavy for me - I missed melody. It was just un-dynamic, hard music.

"I miss something vocally in both, but I liked the energy of this kind of metal. They are both melodic and very groovy. I was listening as a teenager so and while I wouldn’t play Machine Head so much now, Pantera has become a timeless thing for me."

Nightwish

"I can’t remember when I heard Nightwish for the first time, or which Nightwish album it was exactly when I got into them. And I can’t name one Nightwish album that meant so much it was life changing, but touring with them in 2002 with After Forever as a support act - that was life changing for me.

"I wanted to do what they were doing. That kept me going, it gave me a purpose. I remember that was 2002 we were going to go on our first European tour and share our bus with part of the crew with Nightwish. Tony and Ewo [Nightwish’s management] were these massive big Finnish guys. Both of them are extremely tall, broad shouldered, low voiced giants and they came in and explained the basic rules of touring together.

"We were like a bunch of school kids listening to them. We were almost afraid, but then they started talking with their low voices and I realised these are super nice guys. It all came down to just, ‘Don’t be a total asshole, let’s drink a little too much and have a good time.’ Which we did!"

Russell Allen [Symphony X singer]

"He’s simply my favourite singer in metal. His voice is so diverse, he’s someone who can voice emotion so well. His interpretation of a lyric means you feel the lyric, regardless of its meaning - even if it’s about saving the world and, ‘Here comes the demon…’ and shit I don’t personally get excited about.

"He can make a very proggy band with endless solos sound graspable, understandable by his vocals lines. I mean I like Prog, I just don’t fancy listening to endless solos especially on the keyboards when it just sounds like, ‘I can play a lot of notes really fast!’ Then comes Russell just glues everything together with vocal lines that make complete sense over really complicated parts, with that voice that can colour endlessly.

"We’ve been friends since I met him in 2002. He’s nine or ten years older than me, he was 31, I was 21, he’s super American and I was super Dutch and he really made a big impression on me."

Skunk Anansie - Paranoid And Sunburnt

"I already gave away that I like power voices and… what a woman. I found the total package of her fascinating. There she is [Skunk Anansie singer Skin], with her bald head and her blackness, screaming with anger and god forbid she’s bi-sexual. She rubbed it in like, ‘I don’t give a shit what you think.’ I liked the openness of her, the directness of it and her amazing voice.

"She makes things sound so easy when she sings it and then you go ahead and give it a shot and it’s not. To keep it that powerful and controlled, it’s not easy. Fantastic voice, fantastic songwriter, fantastic performer. Weak As I Am - try and finish that from beginning to end with an untrained voice. It was a challenge."

Alanis Morrisette - Jagged Little Pill

"I recently saw her in a documentary about high sensitive people. Someone recommended it to me because I am also a high sensitive person. We’re simply wired differently. There’s something else in our brains, so we perceive the world differently. Hence the fact I was teased so much, why I was a different child and why certain environments don’t work for me.

"You’re more sensitive to the emotions of other people, to smell, sounds. In this documentary she’s talking about it as though she is talking to me. Her experiences are very much like mine. The fact that she is a songwriter herself, she’s doing what she wants and has been doing that her entire career made her a role model."

Roxette - Look Sharp

"This album got me singing. Sitting in the car going on family holiday is the most vivid holiday memory I have so that must be pretty early on. My sister and I would be in the back of the car, singing along with it. We knew all the words. If it was life changing I don’t know, but it sowed the seeds for [singing].

"There was a lot of metal that wasn’t fun to sing. I like Pantera but I’m not going to sing along to it. I like Machine Head and Sepultura. Same thing. [Roxette vocalist Marie Fredriksson] died recently but she made a huge impact on me. She was so forward and so sexy, but she wasn’t seen as a sex object. She was seen as a singer, as a strong woman, as a role model."

#Floor Jansen #nightwish #2020 interviews

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daresplaining · 5 years

Note

SO LIKE. did the spider-gwen comics explain how murderdock and nelson are close enough to call each other "matt" and "foggy"?

They did… sort of. I was actually just gearing up to write a post on Earth-65 Matt and Foggy, because I find them fascinating, so this is perfect timing!

There’s a lot of variation between Earth-65 Matt’s origin story and that of his 616 counterpart, to explain how he developed into such a morally bankrupt character in this universe. Much of this difference comes down to his brutal long-term training with the Hand, during which time he became such a formidable figure within their ranks that they quickly tossed him a leadership position and shipped him overseas. He moved to New York and took a job as head assassin for Wilson Fisk, Kingpin of Crime (later, of course, Matt would steal his crown and take over NYC’s criminal underworld himself). The extra layers of loss added to his origin story in this universe, and the ruthlessness taught to him by his Hand mentors, mean that Earth-65 Matt is a fighter more than anything else– a cunning fighter, certainly, but violence (either his own or that of his pawns) is his primary way of getting things done. But he’s still a Matt Murdock, and though legal work seems to be a much smaller part of his life in this universe, on entering Fisk’s inner circle he was promptly sent to ESU to study law, on what I’d like to think was the mob boss equivalent of a scholarship. And just like in the main continuity, his roommate was Foggy Nelson.

Foggy: “You have to understand… Matt Murdock’s always been… intense. I roomed with the guy for three years of law school. Believe me. I know… But I swear… I never thought he was capable… I never really believed he could… No. I knew. I knew and I still did what I always do… I let him push me over the edge.”

Spider-Gwen vol. 2 #27 by Jason Latour, Veronica Fish, and Rico Renzi

It’s worth pointing out that everyone seems to call Foggy “Foggy” in this universe (and that’s pretty true of 616 Foggy too), so that in itself isn’t indicative of his relationship with Matt. But they have known each other for a long time. Sadly, Foggy’s comment here is the only glimpse we have of that early period in their relationship, but we can extrapolate how fascinating and upsetting it must have been from their dynamic as adults. I would kill for this version of Matt to get his own solo series. There is so much to explore, up to and including this period of his backstory. But I am grateful for his mini-arcs, one of which follows his corruption of Foggy over the course of the series.

While Matt has hit a career high as the new Kingpin and leader of the western branch of the Hand, Foggy has also made it big as the NYC District Attorney. But it’s clear early-on that even though Foggy outwardly opposes Matt’s criminal behavior, these two still have a connection. In fact, given Matt’s comfort in his dealings with Foggy, I’d theorize that he may have (either on Fisk’s instruction or following his own whims) helped engineer Foggy’s career success. After all, it’s very useful for him to have the D.A. in his pocket. And Foggy, though he hates it, is willing to ask for Matt’s help whenever he gets in over his head.

Foggy: “[…] New York’s top cop wants to get up under oath and clear his conscience… air the entire department’s dirty laundry. But we both know Castle connected the Stacys to Spider-Woman. And the public? They’ll roast me on a spit if I don’t do my job… but there’s no way I’m letting George Stacy tell the world we made him hunt his own daughter. So, cards on the table, okay? This is me crossing the aisle… How the hell do we get out of this, Matt?”

Matt: “Why, Foggy… I thought you’d never ask.”

Spider-Gwen vol. 2 #20 by Jason Latour, Robbi Rodriguez, and Rico Renzi

And this isn’t just a one-time thing. Context suggests that Foggy has reached out to Matt (and/or vice versa) for favors before.

Foggy: “You’re not hearing me, Murdock. Big surprise, I know– but just like always… I’m try to give you what you want, Matt.”

Spider-Gwen vol. 2 #20 by Jason Latour, Robbi Rodriguez, and Rico Renzi

616-verse Matt and Foggy often act as each other’s moral anchors. Matt’s unyielding passion for justice is a source of inspiration for Foggy, and Foggy in turn is there to pull Matt back from the brink of making bad decisions. On Earth-65 we see the exact opposite: a mutually detrimental dynamic in which Foggy can’t resist using Matt as a quick, extra-legal solution to his problems– a service Matt, who is always up for some good law-breaking and stabbing– is happy to render. And so we see a Foggy who, though clearly uncomfortable with the whole thing, still plays his part in Matt’s nefarious plots. I’m not sure I would call this a friendship; it’s something far more perverse, a convenient sharing of corruption, and a bond created simply by the fact that they can’t let anyone else know that this alliance exists. Again– I would have loved to see them in law school. Were they ever actually friends? Is there genuine affection at the heart of this dynamic? Or has it always been Foggy just trying to stay afloat in Matt’s overpowering presence?

Judge: “…In light of the mishandling of key evidence by District Attorney Nelson’s office […] I have no choice but to choke back my need to vomit all over these robes… and deem this case a mistrial. Aleksei Sytsevich… you are free to go.”

Foggy: “This #$% better work, Matt.”

Spider-Gwen vol. 2 #21 by Jason Latour, Robbi Rodriguez, and Rico Renzi

Matt’s burden in this universe is power. He is haunted by his own corruption and the ease with which he is able to bend the world to his will. This internal conflict nearly prompts him to commit suicide, and his persistence in toying with Gwen is fueled by a desire to see her corrupted in this same way; to not feel alone in his moral bankruptcy. Leading Foggy into the dark likely isn’t quite as satisfying, because it’s so much easier, but it probably gives Matt some degree of comfort and smug satisfaction.

Richie: “There ain’t no runnin’, man… not from this thing Spider-Woman’s become… S-she coulda– I barely got off that roof without breakin’ my neck! An’ DeWolff? She’s Captain Stacy’s old partner. Ain’t no way I can confess to her… so I thought– Foggy Nelson. He helped me before. An’, well– if it comes out that you was in on what happened– well, you stand as much to lose as me here. So I jus’ thought maybe… maybe you could reach out ta Mr. Murdock for me? Mr. Nelson? Foggy, you still there?”

Foggy: “Yeah. Yeah, I’m here, Richie.”

Spider-Gwen vol. 2 #27 by Jason Latour, Olivia Margraf, and Rico Renzi

But everything starts unraveling for Matt toward the end of the series, including his alliance with Foggy, who gets serious cold feet once real blood starts being shed.

Foggy: “Oh my god… George?”

DeWolff: “You… you and Murdock… Why, Foggy?! Do you even know why?”

Spider-Gwen vol. 2 #22 by Jason Latour, Robbi Rodriguez, Jorge Coelho, Rico Renzi, et al.

Matt: “Frankly, I’m confused, Foggy. Does George Stacy seem particularly chatty to you?”

Foggy: “I wanted him silent, Matt! Not dead!”

Spider-Gwen vol. 2 #24 by Jason Latour, Robbi Rodriguez, and Rico Renzi

The near-fatal attack on his friend George Stacy, prompted by his own request for extra-legal help, causes Foggy to hesitate. He still doesn’t completely reject his alliance with Matt, but he starts seriously questioning his own decisions and the degree to which he has lost his moral center. He is likely too scared to oppose Matt directly, and knows that he is now in so deep that coming clean would land him in jail. But the instant Matt is out of the picture, Foggy tries to clear his conscience by dropping the most serious charges leveled against Gwen. He knows it doesn’t completely make up for what he did, but he wants to atone and this is his attempt at doing so.

Jen: “Foggy’s the district attorney. He decides what you’re charged with. So be it guilt, or sympathy… or some other bewildering reasons that are likely the death of his career– he’s decided to drop the big stuff. Including murder and manslaughter for your role in Peter’s death.”

Spider-Gwen vol. 2 #33 by Jason Latour, Robbi Rodriguez, Chris Visions, and Rico Renzi

Again, I wish we’d seen more of this relationship. I would have loved to witness Foggy’s reaction to Matt’s disappearance/maaaybe death(?) in issue #32. The mini-arc following this dynamic mostly presents it as a professional alliance, a long-term relationship that Foggy stumbled into once upon a time and that he now can’t quite convince himself to get out of. Earth-65 Matt doesn’t have many personal relationships, and so it’s possible that as perverse as the dynamic is, Foggy fits whatever definition he has of friendship. With the recent relaunch of the series under a new creative team, I’m holding a small amount of hope that Matt and Foggy might pop up again. But if not, I’ll always be a fan of what Latour created. Earth-65 Matt has become my favorite alternate universe Matt (just edging out 1602 Matt), and his relationship with this version of Foggy is endlessly compelling to me.

#chesloc #Spider-Gwen #Matt Murdock #Matt Murderdock #Foggy Nelson #Commentary #Asks

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so-shiny-so-chrome · 5 years

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Witness: Supergirrl

Creator name (AO3): supergirrl

Creator name (Tumblr): le-temps-viendra36

Link to creator works: https://archiveofourown.org/series/343042

Q: Why the Mad Max Fandom?

A: I’ve never seen the original three movies, so I went into Fury Road having no idea what I was about to watch, and it changed my life. I’d never seen a movie that looked or felt like Fury Road, and it blew my mind. What inspired me to write fanfiction for the movie were the women, especially the sisters. I had never seen survivors of sexual assault/domestic violence portrayed in that way, and it made me want to write about them.

Q: What do you think are some defining aspects of your work? Do you have a style? Recurrent themes?

A: I think the defining aspects and recurrent themes of my work are feminism and magical realism/mythical steampunk, and the intersection of those different ideas. Those ideas are all present in Fury Road, I try to delve into them more and expand them beyond the scope of the film.

Q: Which of your works was the most fun to create? The most difficult? Which is your most popular? Most successful? Your favourite overall?

A: I don’t know if I can pick a favorite work or one that was most fun, because they’ve all been really rewarding in different ways, but the most difficult one was definitely the Furiosa chapter of Our Words. It took almost two years to write because I really struggled with getting inside Furiosa’s head. Even though I enjoy her a lot as a character, I don’t relate to her the way I do to the sisters. Although they’re all victims of Joe, they occupy very different roles in his regime, with Furiosa occupying a more conventionally ‘masculine’ role as an imperator and the sisters occupying the ‘feminine’ role of breeders/wives, thought they ultimately use their different positions within Joe’s patriarchal hierarchy to overthrow and kill him. As a more conventionally ‘feminine’ person, I relate to them more strongly than I do to Furiosa.

Q: How do you like your wasteland? Gritty? Hopeful? Campy? Soft? Why?How do you like your wasteland? Gritty? Hopeful? Campy? Soft? Why?

A: I think my wasteland is a blend of gritty, soft, and hopeful, but I focus on the hopefulness the most. For me, the wasteland represents our current world and my own mental health/life, and I have to believe that we can make things better (as they ultimately do in the movie).

Q: Walk us through your creative process from idea to finished product. What's your prefered environment for creating? How do you get through rough patches?

A: I either write things in one intense late night writing fest, or in bits and pieces over time. I only write when I’m alone, and I like to either have instrumental music playing or silence.

Q: What (if any) music do you listen to for help getting those creative juices flowing?

A: I have a huuuuge long playlist of music that goes with/inspired each part of Words, composed mainly of film and TV scores, that I listen to whenever I write.

Q: What is your biggest challenge as a creator?

A: Finding the time/energy to actually write my fics down. I think about them all the time throughout the day, I am just really bad at actually physically typing them.

Q: How have you grown as a creator through your participation in the Mad Max Fandom? How has your work changed? Have you learned anything about yourself?

A: I think my work has gotten weirder and more magical/mythical, because I’ve been inspired by the inherently weird, quasi-magical world of Fury Road, and writing Fury Road fic has helped me work through my own experiences as an SA survivor.

Q: Which character do you relate to the most, and how does that affect your approach to that character? Is someone else your favourite to portray? How has your understanding of these characters grown through portraying them?

A: I relate to all five of the sisters in different ways, but especially to Toast. Overall it makes writing her (and Angharad and Cheedo, who I also relate to very strongly) easy and fun. I think I’ve come to see that their different archetypes aren’t mutually exclusive-in their own ways, they’re all knowing and fragile and capable, and so on.

Q: Do you ever self-insert, even accidentally?

A: Yes, I definitely project some of my own thoughts and experiences onto the Sisters, especially with regards to their being survivors of sexual assault. But I think that it’s impossible to completely remove yourself from your writing/characters.

Q: Do you have any favourite relationships to portray? What interests you about them?

A: So many! I really love the relationships of the five sisters, with each other in particular but also other characters, like Furiosa, Max, and Nux. I think their unique personalities, their strong bonds with each other, and their dynamic is endlessly fascinating.

Q: How does your work for the fandom change how you look at the source material?

A: I definitely pay closer attention to minor details, like how the characters’ clothing changes throughout the movie, and what characters are doing in the background, because it’s such a detailed world and there’s a lot you can pick up on in those little things.

Q: Do you prefer to create in one defined chronology or do your works stand alone? Why or why not?

A: My series Words consists of several multi-chapter fics and oneshots that all exist in the same chronology, but I also have some oneshots that stand alone. Overall I prefer to write in the Words universe because it feels more real and detailed to me.

Q: To break or not to break canon? Why?

A: I break canon all the time and I think it’s generally a good thing. For me, I’m usually doing it because I want to tell a story that fits into the broader themes of Fury Road without necessarily aligning with all the specific facts of the film.

Q: Share some headcanons.

A: I have so many! Most are in my fics, but one that I’ve never had the chance to incorporate into my writing is that Miss Giddy used stolen War Boy paint to write the words left in the Vault for Joe to find.

Q: What are some works by other creators inside and outside of the fandom that have influenced your work?

A: Within the fandom, @jaesauce’s modern AUs have definitely influenced how I write Toast and Capable, both as individuals and in the context of their relationship with each other and with Slit and Nux respectively. Outside the fandom, I’ve been really strongly influenced by Jo Graham’s Numinous World series, with its themes of magic, the divine, and social justice.

Q: What advice can you give someone who is struggling to make their own works more interesting, compelling, cohesive, etc.?

A: It sounds a little trite, but in my mind, ultimately fanfiction is for yourself. If other people like it, then great, but that isn’t my purpose in writing it. So I write what I find interesting and compelling, and sometimes other people are interested and sometimes they aren’t, but it’s okay either way. As for maintaining internal cohesion, I find it helpful to re-read what I’ve previously written to make sure I haven’t forgotten anything.

Q: Have you visited or do you plan to visit Australia, Wasteland Weekend, or other Mad Max place?

A: I have not yet, I would like to visit Australia someday, and I think the Wasteland Weekend would be really fun to attend one year.

Q: Tell us about a current WIP or planned project.

A: Right now I’m just working on Knowing, the last fic planned in the Words universe, set from Toast’s POV. I’ve got it all worked out in my head, I just need to get it on the page!

Thank you @le-temps-viendra36

#Mad Max Fandom Spotlight #Mad Max Fandom Creator Spotlight #mad max fanfic #mad max fandom #fury road fandom #fury road fanfic #mad max fanfic author spotlight

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a-shakespearean-in-paris · 5 years

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Writer’s Questionnaire

tagged by @galadrieljones! Thanks! :)

Short stories, novels, or poems? I write a lot of short scenes, but I prefer reading novels as well as writing them. It’s so fun to see how your character grows and changes, how they develop, and how things you thought would happen don’t, or happen in a way different from what you imagined. It’s wonderful, though difficult. (Constantly I have to ask myself have I used this turn of phrase in the story before?)

What genre do you prefer reading? Looking at the books that caught my interest of late, (and in general) the stuff I read has some sort of family dynamic present. More often than not, there’s also a love story. Typically my favorite books are sagas that take place over different generations. (thorn birds one of them, and when I was younger and read a lot of Sidney Sheldon, one of my favorites of his was Master of the game, which took place over fifty years of family. my older self though now really likes Rage of Angels...I would love to like modernize that story...) My dream is to write a long family saga one day.

What genre do you prefer writing? there’s no contest: Romance. I was once very adamant about not using that word due to the stigma behind the romance genre, very keen on...a story about two people who happen to be in love! But you know..it’s romance. I’m just endlessly fascinated by the different ways people can fall in love, and how their love manifests and effects others.

Are you a planner or a write-as-I-go kind of person? Hmmmm.....a little of both. With Our Immortal longings I made an outline of events, but things changed, shifted around, or flat out didn’t happen. Back in the day I was very strict on following the outline I wrote, but now I’ve finally found the happy medium of following it but understanding the story is going in a different direction. I think one of the reasons my modern AU is stagnant right now is because I didn’t make an outline.

What music do you listen to while writing? Usually I don’t. However, there are a few scenes I have written throughout my resume where there was a song I replayed over and over again, because it just fit the mood. So now when I listen to one of those songs, all I can think about is the scene. :)

Fave books/movies? Hmmm I have books that have meant a lot to me over the years. East by Edith Pattou (which now has a sequel. Like..wha?) The Thorn Birds by Colleen McCoullogh, Phantom by Susan Kay. I also love so many plays. Of course Shakespeare, but also Anton Chekhov.

Movies: Howl’s Moving Castle is arguably my biggest inspiration. And when I watched gone with the wind when I was 12 I swear it changed me. I wasn’t used to seeing female characters being so unapologetic, and while I certainly don’t idolize Scarlett O’hara, I find her endlessly interesting as a character. Some other favorites are The Sound of Music, That Hamilton Woman, Wuthering Heights(1939), Bridesmaids. And I saw the new A Star is Born and it’s on my eternal favorites list.

Any current WIPs? My DBH fic has become my main focus, Our Immortal Longings. (Which I would really love to shorten to Immortal Longings but hey what can you do.) I also have a post blight fic with cullen, that details the relationship he develops with one of the chantry sisters. I also have a modern AU with Cullen and Lydia. I like the fic in theory, and I was experimenting away from the romantic feel of my previous work to something blunter and more realistic (for lack of a better word.) But I just feel for Connor’s character when I played DBH, and I really wanted to tackle how he would deal with falling in love. In the process I seriously became enamored with my own OC and the dynamic she has with him. Odd because I was never interested in robots or stories about robots before...but now...well....look at all the possibilities!

also I had a MGIT story about a Shakespearean actress. I’m sorry to those who liked the story, but I’m not going to continue with it.

If someone were to make a cartoon out of you, what would your standard outfit be? A pink colored sundress decorated with flowers, and ballet flats. My hair is big and curly.

Create a character description for yourself: She was alive. That was always good, though perhaps not in the best of her appearances with her glasses on, face unmade and hair in a messy bun. She was also wearing one of her dumpy nightshirts. But again, she was alive, and she was writing. Every single word she wrote was a victory.

Do you like incorporating people you actually know into your writing? Bits of them sure, not blatant insertions to where people I know would know. Maybe just a wink.

Are you kill-happy with characters? Well, people do die IRL and in my writing. But I wouldn’t say I’m kill happy. IWD had two causalities. Will OIL have any? Well....I can’t answer that. Some of my favorite movies/books have poignant deaths, and I will admit the one major death scene that happened on screen in IWD was very cathartic and powerful for me.

Am I George RR Martin kill happy though? no.

Coffee or tea while writing? Morning: coffee. Night: Tea.

Slow or fast writer? I’m reasonably fast, though it certainly depends. sometimes it takes me a while to start.

Where/who/what do you find inspiration from? Everything and anything. I always have my eyes peeled. When I was in Disney I came up with so many scenarios for Connor and Sophie, and yesterday doing sparklers and fireworks with my family I imagined a Cophie new year, lol.

mainly though? Music. Definitely music.

If you were put into a fantasy world, what would you be? In my best life I’m a bard that follows along an adventurer and becomes their companion as they travel the the world.

Most fave book cliche? Least fave book cliche? I’m a sucker for a lot of romantic tropes. The dance of romance, forehead touches, died in your arms, (Is that morbid? lol I’m sorry I just find it so dramatically satisfying.) I love broody guy, gentle girl and variations of that trope. Friends to lovers. in fact I view my two OtPS a variation of the above. I probably have more too. Bedsharing too. I did bedsharing back before I knew everyone else loved it too :)

I’m of the opinion that most things can work if done properly but least favorite is by far the whole liar revealed story arc. at best I tolerate it, but...no. Just no. I’m getting a little tired of “we can’t be together” story lines and love triangles too. I also have tropes that I think are okay but everyone else loves: fake dating. (I know, I know. I even have my own fake dating story too. mostly I wrote it because I wanted to see if I could grow to like it.) and dramatic height differences. but this is mostly because I’m tall, and when I read young adult fiction as a youth, the LI was always so much taller than the herione...and I’m salty ok? lol.

OH on young adult books: I’m tired of the heroine that “isn’t like other girls because I’m tough and reclusive and I don’t like makeup or whatever” (BELLA SWAN) I would like 2019 to be the year that I say you can be a powerful female and still like things that are traditionally feminine, and there should be no shame in it. I love writing characters that draw their strength through their femininity, because guess what...it’s not inherently weak!

Fave scenes to write? I love scenes where the characters just talk. I love grand romantic gestures. I love moments of reflection. And of course, I love a love scene. :p

Most productive time of day for writing? When the muse strikes.

It’s also strange to me that I most want to write when I’m in a crowd of people. maybe sometimes I feel like people are talking without listening and I feel a bit lonely so I imagine my characters, because they make me feel less lonely.

Reason for writing? I always have in some way. The simple reason? I like to. It’s my therapy and my art. I just do :)

this took a long time for some reason! tagging @bitchesofostwick @negotiator-on-site @inquisitorsmabari @fourletterepithet @whatsherfacewrites @laraslandlockedblues @out-of-the-embers @ladymdc

#writing meme

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drinkupthesunrise · 6 years

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Star Wars Rare Pairs Exchange Letter 2018

Hey! While I’m pretty sure I will love WHATEVER you make me, if you are in need / want of some advice, the following may be of interest to you:

In general, I like: pining, unrequited love that turns out not to be unrequited, people being friends & in love with each other generally, found family, ridiculous references, fic that explores what characters mean to each other in a greater context, alt!timeline shit (ie, what would happen if a character had made x choice instead of y), complicated relationships, baby/kid!fic, hurt/comfort.

Things I do not want: character bashing, unnecessary character death (ymmv here it’s Star Wars, characters die, I accept that, but please don’t kill anyone off in the pairings, canonical deaths are fine), gratuitous / explicit violence, mundane!AUs (coffee!shop, high school/college, etc), dubcon/noncon in any form, cheating, first person POV.

General links that might be useful to you: my ao3 works, my fic writing tag, my ficlet tag, and my general star wars tag.

General note: I like characters, and relationships, best when they’re situated in a world that feels real, and that means having other characters around them, and the relationships between them. While the pairings below should definitely be the focus of any fic, please feel free to slip in other things that you think I might like. I think what’s below should give you an idea of that, hopefully :D. For instance, I adore Wedge’s relationship / friendship with the rest of the Fab Four / his pilots in general, and I find the Han / Luke / Leia dynamic endlessly fascinating (both platonically and romantically on all sides), I’m always up for guest appearances from anyone from any point in canon.

Wedge Antilles/Luke Skywalker

Would happily take anything, but specific loves include stuff with them founding Rogue Squadron and that early part of their relationship, where they’re a little unsure and unfamiliar but still utterly trusting of each other? Or in the aftermath of Endor where Luke’s off founding the Jedi Order and Wedge is off fighting the Imperial Remnant and they’re trying to work out if they could have a relationship in all of that? I really love these two, the relationship between them really is one of my all-time faves.

I am also desperate for pre-and-post-TLJ era fic for them. What does Wedge make of Luke’s choices and decisions? Did Wedge go with him to Ahch-To? If Wedge is present, how does that affect the choices Luke makes?

I would also sell my soul for Jedi Academy-era fic in which Wedge is a teacher at Luke’s Jedi Academy, either with them in an established relationship and founding the school, or where Wedge gets involved somehow and slowly realises, oh, actually, Luke is very attractive and there is a lot of pining, and Luke is off having the same realisations about Wedge.

Wedge Antilles/Mara Jade/Luke Skywalker

In which Wedge Antilles and Mara Jade have precisely one thing in common: they both think that Luke Skywalker is endearing and also kinda useless, and would do anything for him. Which includes teaming up to save Luke when he gets into yet more trouble (insert situation of choice here) despite the fact that Mara is really not very convinced by this short fly-boy with floppy hair who cannot act, and Wedge is not really over the fact that Mara wanted to kill Luke. Bonus points for them discovering that they have far more in common than they think, and for Talon Karrde & Booster Terrik background shenanigans.

(I’d be okay with platonic!wedge&mara, if you can’t get that bit to work, but I would like Wedge and Mara to both be in love with Luke - or on their way there - and for Luke to love them both back.)

Wedge Antilles/Leia Organa

I think Wedge and Leia are very alike, in some ways - both soldiers with a sense of duty that goes far beyond themselves, who’d sacrifice their personal lives for their ideals every time. So anything that builds on that, really; either early Alliance / Rebellion (pre / post Yavin), with Leia still trying to sort out her feelings for Han / Luke and working them out with the person who is the mid-ground between the two (fight me on this Wedge is Han’s smuggling no-good self crossed with Luke’s idealism and good!man nature), or possibly after the Jedi Temple Massacre, or post TLJ, where they are the last two left standing and seek solace in each other?

Also! If you have read the 2013 Marvel Star Wars comic (the Wood/D’Anda one), you should know I was so very very very weak for Leia as Squadron Commander and Wedge as her second, and I cannot believe that was an actual thing that happened in Legends okay??

Wedge Antilles/Han Solo

Okay I can hear you probably going ‘huh what’ and I submit to you these quotes from the X-Wing books, and actually the entirety of Solo Command as a book. Essentially, Corellians giving each other shit. But no seriously in Solo Command there’s a real easiness and willingness to tease and I’d be really interested as to how they got there, and if it ever was anything more.

Also, in new canon – I’ve always figured that Wedge and Han might have a bit of antagonistic start to their relationship, Wedge is much more of a believer and very willing to die for the cause – how does he react when he finds out what Han did in Solo? Aiding Enfys Nest? Does that change his feelings?

Wedge Antilles/Leia Organa/Han Solo

Okay so Wedge spends an astonishing amount of time in the X-Wing books putting Han and Leia’s relationship back together (only for The Courtship of Princess Leia to happen, poor guy.) Like. He’s really invested in it. And also half in love with both of them it seems.

But, what I really want … is new canon, in which during the Aftermath trilogy Wedge ends up staying with Leia, and sort of never leaves, and even when Han comes back he’s still there, and then he helps out when Ben is born, because Wedge is very good with babies and this is a very important fact, and slowly Han and Leia realise, oh, wait, we never want him to leave.

I would also be very happy with drunken hook-ups, or Han and Leia accidentally propositioning Wedge.

Wedge Antilles/Biggs Darklighter

They must have known each other on Yavin, so it’s not inconceivable that they might have met and, y’know, got it on. So quick and dirty introductions, or possibly even something set later, after the Death Star battle, where Biggs!lives and the two pilots who didn’t get that shot off try and find solace in each other.

Wedge Antilles/Bodhi Rook

So – well, Wedge was at the Imperial Academy for a time, as was Bodhi, and although it’s unlikely they were in classes together, I think that their paths could have crossed; what’s it like when they see each other on Yavin all those years later? If Bodhi is the only survivor of the Rogue One team, and Wedge is the only survivor of the original pilots (Luke is too new, really) do they find solace in each other? Do they only really catch up after the war with each other, and suddenly realise that no one else is quite going to understand their grief? (I am heavily into Wedge Antilles has a case of survivor’s guilt the size of a Star Destroyer this ship only compounds my feelings).

Wedge Antilles/Lando Calrissian

They took down a Death Star together, that’s a start. I think the other thing about these two is they’re both very set on keeping their people safe – Wedge with his pilots, Lando with the people of Cloud City, and they have principles and lines they won’t cross but they’ll go through hell and back to try and save as many as they can. So maybe something about that?

Wedge Antilles/Col "Fake Wedge" Takbright

I can’t believe Jason Fry made ‘fake wedge’ an actual thing, but IT HAPPENED, and so we should all take advantage of this glorious fact by making them kiss or something, I dunno, fill in the blanks.

On a semi-serious note, I actually really like the care between them at the end of that story, how Col takes one look at about-to-succumb-to-the-worst-survivor’s-guilt-wedge and just, doesn’t stand for it. And so I would LOVE fic about all the times that Col keeps digging Wedge out of despair. Maybe about how Col turns into Wedge’s most erstwhile defender, and Wedge keeps asking why Col keeps putting himself on the line for him, and realisations about how maybe what’s between them has developed into something more.

Wedge Antilles/Mon Mothma

This was mostly crack, until I incepted myself with last year’s rare pairs letter, and now I have very serious feelings about it and I want them to be in love. And have really good sex.

I think they are both serious impassioned people who want to do what is right, only Wedge is brash and daring and Mon is tempered by experience / diplomacy. So maybe something where Wedge does something reckless and Mon has to take him to task for it? Or Wedge trying to lure Mon out of her seriousness, but also he is a very serious person himself but seriously, Chancellor, you have been at your desk for twenty hours please come to the mess. Love letters – they write letters after the war and slowly fall in love?

Fucked-up power dynamics are also very much a feature: Mon is ultimately Wedge’s commander in chief, his life is in her hands, etc. I like the power play, I like it a lot.

Wedge Antilles/Amilyn Holdo

There’s something about the way Amilyn reacts to flyboys doing stupid things, like she has seen it all before. Maybe she has? I feel these two would have really good banter and a very sparky relationship, lots of challenging each other. But also mutual respect, possibly found later – they are both very good at their jobs.

I’d love fic set post-Rebellion era, where they’re both trying to find their footing in the new Galaxy, or maybe fic set around TLJ – what if Wedge is with the Resistance? Does he conflict with Amilyn over her command decisions? (I think Amilyn should still have charge of the Resistance, don’t make Wedge outrank her.) Can he mediate the conflict between her and Poe? What if Wedge is with the Republic and brings a fleet to save the day?

Wes Janson/Derek “Hobbie” Klivian

So Wes and Hobbie are like the ultimate wingpair / brothers-in-arms, they are two peas in a pod, and I love them. I like slow realisation of feelings, the dragging out of the relationship over the years, perhaps one of them pining away whilst the other one wakes up one day and is like ‘oh, it’s you, you’ve been here all along and I never noticed.’ But also! Comic shenanigans, prank wars between them, practical jokes, truth or dare - I’m easy to please, honestly.

Jagged Fel/Jaina Solo/Zekk

Okay, for those who didn’t go and read all of Legends… Jagged Fel is Wedge Antilles’ nephew, Jaina Solo was Han and Leia’s daughter, and Zekk was one of Luke’s students. There was a bit of a love triangle going on. However, in many points, it was less of a love triangle, and more… well. They should have all banged.

Key moments include that time Jaina and Zekk were in a hive mind, and got slightly confused over whose memories were whose, leading to this conversation:

Our boyfriend means business, Zekk observed.

Don’t know that it’s him. And it’s old boyfriend.

Right. We’re so over him.

We?

And also the bit in Legacy of the Force: Invincible, where after Jag and Zekk help pull Jaina out of a sticky situation, she, in a state of confusion due to her banged up head, asks them to both to bunk with her.

So, basically, I want poly shenanigans – fic after the proposed quarters sharing would be great (what if Jag and Zekk took her seriously and had already moved everything about by the time she came round???), messy relationship rebuilding after the Dark Nest fiasco, something where Zekk steps in as Jaina and Jag’s relationship starts to fall apart post NJO? I dunno. But I want them all to kiss.

Plourr Ilo/Evaan Verlaine

They are both kickass lady pilots, and they are both very gay, sooooooooo… it is a crime that they do not exist in the same canon. I want shenanigans. I want an encounter where one or both is undercover and they don’t realise the other is a rebellion / new republic pilot until after everything. I want them on different squadrons trying to one up each other.

#rare pairs #sw rare pairs #fic exchange #exchange letter

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kalinara · 6 years

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Top 10 Ships that include Rip

Sorry it took me so long to answer this one! I’m not really a ‘shipper by nature, so it was surprisingly difficult to think of ten. But here we go:

Rip/Gideon - “Time Ship” - I like Time Ship a lot. Especially now that the show has gone out of its way to address at least some of the ethical concerns I had with regard to Gideon’s capacity to consent. (Gideon helping Sara remove Rip’s command codes in Return of the Mack is a pretty clear indication that she could have done so at any time previously.) It’s not a pairing that I ever really expect the show to follow up, to be honest. They barely remember Gideon’s a character at all. As evidenced by the way that Gideon and Rip never got a goodbye in Aruba, and Gideon’s never got to clearly express ANY kind of opinion regarding the Time Bureau or Rip’s actions. (It’s not as cute as calling Ava a bitch, I guess.)

My favorite version of the pairing involves Gideon remaining an AI rather than miraculously obtaining a human body. As an aroace person, I am very drawn to relationships that are strictly cerebral in nature.

Rip/Jonah - “Time Hex”- Time Hex is my other OTP in this fandom. I like it because I feel like Rip is one of those characters that’s so heavy with baggage that he would benefit from a romance that is separate from all those issues. (Jonah too, based on what I remember from his comic book.)

As a pairing, they remind me of Duncan and Amanda from Highlander, a reference that dates me considerably. Duncan is the main character, a stand up dude who has a pretty stable life when he’s not getting attacked by rival immortals or getting involved with helping his friends. Amanda is a friend of his who is a thief, constantly involved in low level, or sometimes high level, mischief. She pops into his life occasionally bringing chaos in her wake. They love each other dearly, though they’re definitely not suited to romantic monogamy with one another. They would never be happy trying to live one another’s life. But that doesn’t mean they won’t have some fun sex and romance assuming that they’re both unattached when they meet up.

That’s generally how I see Rip and Jonah. Rip is the Amanda of the pairing.

Rip/Sara - “Time Canary” - I was big into Time Canary for a while, and I admit, I would probably still enjoy it if the show took that route. Though I do think that there are a lot of issues, from both of them, that would need to be addressed.

Their dynamic, platonic or otherwise, is one of the main draws of the show for me. Rip’s respect for Sara is very satisfying. And I still get wrapped up in his unconditional support of her in Blood Ties, when she’s dealing with her bloodlust, or Left Behind, whenever I rewatch. Likewise, I love to see her call him out in episodes like Star City 2046 and River of Time. He needs that.

Rip/Ray - “AtomicTime”?? - It’s always made me sad that Rip and Ray don’t get paired that often, because I’ve always thought that their dynamic was sweet. Ray was one of the first people that Rip confided in and seemed to respect. And Ray was always good at being emotionally supportive. That scene in Leviathan when he gets Rip to talk about his family is lovely. And for all that Rip tends to get exasperated at the whole team, he seems to have more patience toward Ray’s enthusiasm than a lot of other quirks.

Also, both characters have lived with a lot of loss, and I tend to think Rip admires Ray for being unfailingly upright and positive despite that.

Also the size difference is hot.

Rip/Kendra - Does this have a ship name? - This is a dynamic that I always wished was explored more, considering how their storyline and losses were constantly paralleled in season 1. They didn’t have a lot of direct interaction, but what they did have was unfailingly positive. (His focus on getting Carter’s body back for her, his pairing her and Sara to help them deal with respective issues, the way that she will actually tease him a little, particularly in Last Refuge…) Sadly I feel like Kendra’s role in the main quest got sidelined by romantic drama a bit too much, but I still really like their dynamic.

Rip/Jax - TimeStorm! - I might be the only one who ships this. But I think their dynamic is fascinating, especially in season 2. We saw a lot of interesting development with their relationship, despite the fact that Rip was only in a few episodes as himself. But somehow those interactions really speak to me. Rip is the one who named Jax chief engineer to begin with, giving him a way to contribute that’s completely separate from being Firestorm, and I think Jax really valued that. The Jax and Rip interaction in Turncoat was amazing and painful, and I think it’s significant that of all the characters, Jax is the one who had the most face to face contact with the man that Eobard created. And the jellybean scene is still very sweet. Pun somewhat intended.

I still wish the show had done more with the fact that Rip and Jax were the two youngest of the men, and considerably more mature/focused than Ray or Nate. I would have liked to see that explored more, especially once Rip was no longer isolated by his Captaincy.

Rip/Mick - Did this one ever get a name? Hunterwave? or Rip/Snart -??? - I admit, I’m not much of a Rogues fan now, but a few betrayals ago, I was really interested in the way that the show set these three characters up as parallels.

Rip, like Snart, had a criminal past. Interestingly, at around the same age too. At five years old, Snart was helping his father crimes. At five years old, Rip was stealing on the streets to survive. Like Snart and Mick, Rip comes from a background that is clearly abusive, both before and with the Time Masters. (The Orphanage was nice, sure, but look at what happened in Marooned, or well, the series as a whole.)

Last Refuge added a whole fascinating level to the conflicts between the characters, by showing us that Rip sees his past, and his similarity to the Rogues as something to be ashamed of and overcome.

And of course, there are newer parallels between Chronos and Evil!Rip, as both characters have been violated and transformed by their enemies. There are the things that Mick learned as Chronos that allow him a greater understanding of certain aspects of Time Travel, which we saw explored a little toward the end of season 1. I would have loved to see the show deal with this more. (with regard to fanfic, @darkestsight has a few lovely Mick and Rip vignettes, and Mick has a fairly prominent role in both of my fanfics as well. You can be the judge as to how well I write him.)

On a ship level, I think either pairing has some interesting perspective. Mick seems to be at his best when he’s protecting someone more vulnerable, and there’s that edge of conflict that makes it a bit interesting. Snart is clearly attracted to enigmas and puzzles, and Rip’s squirrelly nature would make him interesting in that respect (see Last Refuge.) I’m not sure either pairing would end well.

Rip/Savage or Rip/Eobard - my darkships. Feel free to mock me for my rampant hypocrisy. I’ve blogged about both of these before. It’s the obsession I find fascinating, the way both villains are so incredibly focused on defeating Rip. Savage is more brutal, but also more dramatic: even before he knew Rip was a time traveler, he’d kept his pen and set him up as the Satan figure of his cult. Eobard is colder, more personally corruptive: taking a specific glee in transforming Rip into a tool, and then displaying him as a trophy.

In both cases, the villains are concerned with other goals and heroes more than they are with Rip of course. I won’t pretend that he’s as important to them as Kendra or Barry respectively. But it’s still a darkly interesting dynamic.

Bonus:

Rip/The Crew as one giant OT9/10/whatever - At my heart, I still pretty much believe that Rip is lowkey in love with his entire former team. Possibly his Bureau as well. I don’t think he expects anything to ever come of it, but I am positive that he’s composed drunken sonnets to them all on really bad nights. Gideon has the footage.

If it ever did get to a physical stage, like in a giant ship orgy, I fully expect them all to mock him endlessly with “Oh, look, the British are coming.”

#rip hunter #legends of tomorrow #Anonymous

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gloriousgwendolinechristie · 7 years

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Press: Gwendoline Christie on ‘Game of Thrones’ and Brienne’s Love Triangles

NY TIMES – In Sunday’s Season 7 finale of “Game of Thrones,” after arriving at King’s Landing from Winterfell, Brienne of Tarth (Gwendoline Christie) bears witness to the presentation of the undead wight, the hard-won proof of the common evil all of the show’s characters will soon face.

Can opposing sides put aside their squabbles and band together to prevent the end of the world? For her part, Brienne tries to facilitate that, even if she’s rebuffed in the moment by Jaime Lannister (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau), her former road trip partner. We talked with Ms. Christie about Brienne’s tête-à-tête with her gold-handed man, her reunion with a past combatant and her unusual love triangles. Following are edited excerpts from that conversation.

Sansa sent Brienne to King’s Landing as her representative, but also because she didn’t want or need her around to dispose of the Littlefinger problem. How do you feel about how that was resolved?

Back in Season 3, when she was escorting Jaime Lannister to King’s Landing, there was a farmer who witnessed them on the road. Jaime said, “That farmer knows who I am. What if he tells someone?” implying that she needed to go and kill him. And Brienne refused, because she didn’t believe it was the right thing to do. She doesn’t believe in dispatching a life unless it’s absolutely necessary. Unless it’s official. Look at the way she beheaded Stannis. She essentially read him his rights. Although it was loaded with emotion for her, she presented it in a very official, formal way, with great nobility. So I don’t know how Brienne will react to people taking matters into their own hands at Winterfell. Brienne is about a code of honor, a code of conduct, and she never kills anyone just for the sake of it.

It’s complex, though, because Brienne’s made her oath to Catelyn Stark to protect the Stark girls. It’s a little bit of a tricky situation because both Sansa and Arya have had their own journeys, and at times, some horrific experiences. I think she wishes she had been able to save them from what they had been forced to experience. We can use the word “maternal” because it has so many connotations, but what I like about it is that, in Brienne’s own way, she is expressing something of their mother to them. She’s protecting them as best she can. I think things are getting more interesting for Brienne now. I know it’s not what she wanted, to leave Sansa’s side, but being at King’s Landing as Sansa’s representative sort of upped her game. It’s going beyond the remit of what she thought her job description was.

Brienne and the Hound get a nice little reunion, considering the last time she saw him, she left him for dead.

She’s shocked when she spies him, because of course she thinks that when she defeated and dispatched him, that she killed him. And she decides to do the decent thing and go up to him, and he quite understandably gives her a bit of the cold shoulder at first. She says that she’s sorry for harming him, that she was only trying to protect Arya, and he says that’s all he was doing as well. And so they come to a sort of begrudging respectful silence. An acknowledgment of each other. Of each other’s status as warriors.

And it’s rather good to see them come together. You don’t expect the Hound to overcome the injury, not just to his physical body, but to his male pride, being nearly killed by a woman. And Brienne sees in the Hound a quality that she has, which is utter resilience, against all of the odds. What seems to be becoming clearer is this idea that they all need to overcome their differences and see the similarities in each other, to fight something that is essentially the destruction of mankind. No matter how large or how small, they need to engage with this idea of unity against a common evil.

That’s the crux of her argument with Jaime Lannister.

Why will he not give everything to overcome that? Brienne is … not heartbroken, but incredibly shocked and hurt, and that hurt makes her question the relationship and what it really means to her. Jaime sort of treats her like she’s a stranger, and fobs her off. It’s incredibly tense. Their past trust and mutual respect just seems to be meaningless. They have had this complex relationship which really can’t be defined, so it’s a really fascinating setup to move forward, for where we will go in the final season. I think although he treats her fairly coldly, what we’ve seen with Jaime Lannister is that he might respond badly to something, particularly with Brienne, but then he takes the time to reflect and think about it, and he’s sort of brought back.

Unlike Cersei, Brienne usually makes him want to be a better man. It’s kind of an inversion of the Beauty and the Beast scenario, where he is both the beauty and the one who needs to be transformed.

Yes! It’s so interesting the way the parallels are played with, in that you have a female character who isn’t cute, isn’t beautiful, isn’t sexy, isn’t conventionally attractive, but she has an incredibly attractive interior world, a world that is firmly harnessed to a moral compass. She’s very focused on dedicating her life to the good of others. She’s driven and selfless, and that’s a rare combination.

When Brienne and Jaime are together, something incredibly magnetic seems to occur. Last season, there was that scene where she tries to persuade him to allow her to speak to the Blackfish, and she’s able to communicate and negotiate with him, and be heard by him in a way that doesn’t really exist between many of the other male and female characters. In a way that’s not about manipulation, but is positive. So I’m endlessly fascinated by their dynamic. I really am.

And then there’s the dynamic with Tormund, which delights a lot of fans. He recently announced his desire to procreate with Brienne, despite the fact that she does not seem to reciprocate his affections, at all.

[Laughs] Yeah! Do you think she actually likes him? I don’t think it’s something Brienne wants! Tormund is quite a rough and ready man. He’s a man who’s bragged about having sexual intercourse with a bear, and so I question whether that is necessarily the right person for Brienne. Does that man display enough sensitivity? What do you think Tormund would have to come up with to win her heart?

Well, that’s a bit of a problem with wildling culture. The free folk believe the man should steal the woman. That’s their idea of courtship. With Brienne, he might have more success if he tried to have an actual conversation with her first.

I think he’d have to have a conversation with her for at least four years. [Laughs] She seems fairly repelled by Tormund’s strong overtures toward her. She’s more enthused by a more cerebral approach. Brienne puts her hand on Jaime’s shoulder in this episode, to stop him as he goes to walk off, and that really throws him off balance. So it’s taken them, what? Nearly five years to just put a hand on his shoulder?!

And that’s after they’ve seen each other naked!

[Laughs] They’re working from Point 10 to Point 2. Exactly. And then I think, the poor woman. Look at her choices: the man who brags about having sex with a bear, or the man who has sex with his sister! Maybe there’s another option? I really want her to have someone more stable. I don’t know. I’m a bit surprised by how much attention that the most unconventional female character on the show has garnered for her love life!

Press: Gwendoline Christie on ‘Game of Thrones’ and Brienne’s Love Triangles was originally published on Glorious Gwendoline

#gwendoline christie #game of thrones #got cast #Brienne of Tarth #star wars #Captain Phasma #The Force Awakens #Mockingjay 2 #Commander Lyme #THG #The Hunger Game

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zjarondinelli · 5 years

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“We Don’t Just Passively Perceive the World, We Actively Generate It”: What Perception as Conscious Hallucination Means for “The Scientist in the Crib”

TED (April 2017 – Vancouver, BC)

Anil Seth: Your Brain Hallucinates Your Conscious Reality

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I have always strongly believed in the idea that each of us perceives objects, experiences, texts, communications, and even the world around us, in extraordinarily different ways. It is likely that this interest is why I am so drawn to the postmodern philosophy of theorists such as Jean Baudrillard and Slavoj Zizek (among others), whose work, through an admittedly far more pessimistic lens than my own, strives to find ways to explain or identify what is “real” and what is not. As I have been quite open about, technology, artificial intelligence (AI), virtual reality (VR), simulacra and simulation, hyperreality, and many other theories that probe the deepest questions about reality are quite constantly on my mind.

I was lucky to stumble across Anil Seth’s (2017) talk from TED Vancouver, “Your Brain Hallucinates Your Conscious Reality”, while preparing a revised draft of my upcoming journal article, “‘C’mon. Sell Me Another One’: Simulation, Sacrifice, and Symbolic Revolution in Mister Miracle (2017)”, based on the recommendations of one of my reviewers. When I watched the video, I immediately beca me fascinated with his suggestion that all of human perception could be boiled down to the concept of “controlled hallucinations”. In response to the question of reality, Seth suggests that what we consider “reality” is simply a hallucination that we all jointly agree on, and he goes on to illustrate this idea with many wonderful neurological experiments, illusions, and techno-demonstrations (Seth, 2017).

I believe that there is a powerful dynamic relationship that exists between the ideas of perception, cognition, and learning; we have to look no further than the “Ancient Question” of the External World problem (EWP) to identify this (Gopnik, Meltzoff, and Kuhl, 1999). The EWP discusses the dichotomous situation whereby we (people/human selves) can consciously recognize a world of external objects and independent properties, yet can only really experience them as “an endlessly changing chaotic flow of sensations” (Gopnik et al., 1999). Through his work with babies, Piaget interrogated the EWP, positioning his theory to acknowledge babies’ worldview as “complex, and as highly structured, as the adult view” (p. 16), yet simultaneously “profoundly, qualitatively different from the adult view” (Gopnik, et al., 1999, p. 16). Ultimately, this led Piaget to the determination that babies learning mechanisms were present and capable of providing them the necessary tools to construct rapidly changing pictures of the world based on their external experiences (Gopnik et al., 1999).

I see a connection, even a dramatic extension, between Piaget, the EWP, and Seth (2017). In a manner reminiscent of Gopnik et al.’s (1999) description of our everyday experiences as “tiny events on the edges of our bodes, photons bombarding our retinas, molecules of air vibrating at our eardrums, flickers of pressure on our fingertips” (p. 60), Seth says that perception is nothing more than streams of electrical impulses fed into the brain based in response to the objects or things that we interact with in the world (2017). In this way, perception could be redefined as a process of “informed guesswork” where the brain, as functional “prediction engine”, combines external signals with pre-existing expectations and knowledge about the way that the world works in order to form it’s best guess surrounding what caused the signal in the first place (Seth, 2017). If we accept Seth’s premise of “perception as informed guesswork”, then the metaphor established by Gopnik et al., and hinted at by Piaget, of the “Scientist in the Crib” becomes even more powerful because what is scientific inquiry if not the elaborate evaluation of informed hypotheses and guesswork?

While the video implies a monumental implication for perception and the EWP, there is also an implication about how consciousness impacts our recognition of the self. In one of the most interesting experiments Seth (2017) discusses, how a person hooked up to VR featuring a simulated hand can begin to assimilate the virtual, simulated hand into their conscious body (Seth, 2017). By simulating the arm to flash red in response to the person’s internal heartbeat, he demonstrates the ways that interoception (the way we experience our body from the inside) can impact our conscious perception of reality (Seth, 2017). What is revealed is that when the simulated arm flashing is in line with our internal heartbeat, the viewer begins to have feelings of assimilation (the virtual, simulated arm is actually theirs), while when they do not align it is much easier to perceive the arm as simulated (Seth, 2017).

The implications here, I believe, could be enormous for providing some sense of whether or not babies do indeed have a “deeper conception of what it is to be human” (Gopnik et al, 1999, p. 29). Immediately following both of my sons’ births, my wife and I were encouraged to provide skin-to-skin contact to the baby as a way to comfort them and make them feel safe. While I loved providing this safety for my boys, I did wonder how the act of skin-to-skin functioned to create this phenomenon for a newborn. By considering the implications of Seth’s experiment with newborn babies, I wonder if it might be possible to extend this to learning about others, as well as self. If the newborn, who has just spent nine months deeply connected to another human, finds themselves traumatically extricated from that lived experience and supplanted into a new (separated) one, could we say that the skin-to-skin contact grounds their new experiences within a similar assimilation of reality? In other words, does the skin-to-skin, and by extension the sensation of a heartbeat that is different from their own, begin to provide the necessary neurological impulses required to identify the existence of other people who are not us? I find this idea incredibly fascinating.

Of course, this only scratches the surface of possible correlations between Seth’s (2017) theories and cognition or learning. I found the video incredibly revelatory and can say it has certainly changed the way that I will think about my conscious reality. The three implications that his new conceptualization of reality, perception, and interoception reveals (the mental health implications for understanding neurological disorders/psychosis as a misperception of self, an argument against the posthuman call for a singularity of consciousness, and the fact that our individual experiences are only one potential way of being conscious) are each independently fascinating and provide fertile ground for continued interrogation within the context of cognition and learning. I look forward to considering these possibilities together.

References

Gopnik, A., Meltzoff, A., & Kuhl, P. (1999). The scientist in the crib: What early learning tells us about the mind. New York, NY: HarperPetternial.

TED. (2017, April). Anil Seth: Your brain hallucinates your conscious reality.[Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyu7v7nWzfo

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juliatakesnotes · 7 years

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Experience as Art: A Trip to Oaxaca with Pocoapoco's Jessica Chrastil | Apiece Apart

Can you share more about your upbringing? What led you to explore this space of living a creative life outside the role of an "artist"?

I grew up in a family that loved learning for learning’s sake. My mother (not an artist by any known definition) has always viewed reading and researching — on nearly any topic — as the most thrilling way a person could possibly spend a day. As a child, boredom was never an option, the fact that knowledge was out there waiting to be had was like open access to an goldmine. As a kid I loved skimming through the encyclopedia — science, people, art, countries, beliefs — so much information available in one place and context and because of its basic proximity it all appeared connected no matter how disparate it was. So comforting and exciting.

My father is the same way about people as my mother is about information — he never misses the chance to talk with anyone, hear their story, find an avenue for connection no matter how brief the interaction. In this vein, I have so many friends and people in my life who are not practicing artists, but who have the most most creative, diverse, innovative, and engaged approach to day to day work and life, as well as in the way they choose to document or share this work/ knowledge. It’s endlessly inspiring.

The process of learning, of experiencing, of connecting has always seemed like this fantastic project of sorts that never has to become a piece of art or even a means to an end but is more like the continuous building of a personal library.

Are there any texts / quotes that have been particularly significant in thinking or researching more about this?

Essays in general are a favorite, writers that write non-fiction in a way that is as dynamic, experimental, and rich as fiction. Of course Joan Didion, her language of experience and research. I like Alain de Botton’s approach to philosophy, or anyone who manages to convey knowledge and a thought process through an unlikely shape or voice (can be anyone: My five-year-old nephew makes the most amazing drawings of the periodic table and the history of the British monarchy...)

What are some realizations about life, art, and the connection thereof that the residents have taught you?

I get to see Oaxaca through new eyes each time a new person or resident comes through. The way people react to and connect with a new place or community is fascinating — especially when they come at it exploring whatever they are passionate about. It's like seeing each person wear the same shirt with an amazing, yet completely different outfit to a party.

So much innovation and creative output stems from a person's deep knowledge of and subsequent ease with their particular craft or topic. Photographers become so obsessed and vocal about light that for weeks all I can see are the shapes of shadows on walls. Florists use little purple bananas to create beautiful floral designs and centerpieces. Chefs seem to use the same bags of beans I see everyday to create meals so distinctly different from each other. One favorite project was a designer who photographed "mistake sculptures" all over the city, random stacks of objects that people here use to hold parking spaces. Yet when he presented photos of the mistake sculptures they looked so intentional.

That said, I think I originally had an idea that people were going to be most excited about what specifically they were researching but I believe people have been most excited and inspired by the connections they’ve made with people here, people from/in Oaxaca, as well as the others taking part in the residency.

Why Oaxaca?

Pocoapoco, or poco a poco, means “little by little” or “slowly,” “gradually.” It says a lot about the approach to this residency project, and definitely about life in Oaxaca. Maybe subconsciously it came from what I was looking for upon leaving New York — more time to let things unfold, more time to learn, less about finishing, and more about experiencing and creating a space for anyone to do the same. It’s a commonly discussed fact that Oaxaca is a great place for ideas but can be an impossible place to actually get things done.

In general, the residency provides a space for those looking to explore or expand their creative work. We host artists and non-artists in a variety of fields to support research, conversation, and community surrounding this work, process, and purpose. This happens through month-long residencies as well as week-long residency / workshops, and a variety of individual projects and collaborations. A large part of this is about working closely with individuals and organizations in the Oaxaca area to provide education, inspiration, and cross–cultural exchange within these creative dialogues.

Prior to moving to Oaxaca I was in New York and before that California for a so long, working in food and restaurants. In New York I was creative director at an NGO, we worked with artisan businesses around the world. I traveled a lot and spent a huge amount of time talking with people all over about how and why they create — also exploring how travel and culture and experience is so deeply embedded into and influential on the work we do, artistic or otherwise. One of these projects was in Oaxaca, and I suppose I fell in love with the place. There was very little logic involved in moving. I had lived north, west, east. Now south. This is a stopping point.

Talk more about the difficulties that come with being an outsider in a new place. And on the flip side, what is gained?

There is a deep level of awkwardness and self-consciousness (at least personally) on entering a new place, especially a place with such deep history and customs and roots. On trying to simultaneously respect that place, understand those terms, navigate your way into it and meld with it, and still maintain the sense of self that is so crucial to any good relationship. It’s hard and makes me feel like such a floppy ridiculous adolescent all over again.

That said, I think self-consciousness is important and it keeps us on our toes. But there is also a fine line between self-consciousness and being crippled by over-analyzation which puts a wrench into making any connection with anything. I’ve gone through so many iterations of this balance in the past year and a half. like to think that lately there are fewer wrenches, a bit less awkwardness. A little more trust and commitment.

People come down often and glamorize life here, but this has definitely been one of the hardest transitions of my life. I suppose this is also because building the residency has meant navigating Oaxaca and how to most gracefully enter this place, while also quickly becoming a bridge for so many others coming through. This is wonderful and so fun but also brings a sense of responsibility and nervous protection on both ends. It feels important that the residents are understanding and considerate of this balance — when to bring a strong sense of self, ideas, and needs to the table, and when to step back and just listen, learn, observe. I suppose that is why to do it here, because Oaxaca has made the residency project not just about a "residency" but about exploring the connections between places and people and ideas, about thoughtful interaction, about how to be a responsible traveler and artist, a compassionate and curious human.

Below is a list of questions that one of our partners here wrote for a group of photographers coming down in hopes of getting them thinking about what it meant to be behind the camera here. I think it’s pretty relevant to everyone coming through to explore a topic or project.

How does the photographer affect the context/environment? Is it possible to capture those effects?

How does the environment affect the photographer? Is it possible to capture these effects?

What is the difference between a touristic photo and documentary photo?

When taking photos, are you giving and creating, or are you extracting something?

Are you on safari or are you creating meaningful interactions?

How does the camera make you closer to or separate you from the experience and the context?

How are you present in your pictures? Does objectivity exist in photos? If you are portraying reality, what does everything else portray?

Is your personal story present in the photos you take? Can you show this in them while photographing others?

Is it possible to portray the similarities between you and the people you are taking pictures from? The differences?

Which long lasting elements, as opposed to instantaneous, do you find in your photos? Why would they be important for the future?

Could you describe an image from your life which is not a photo? Why would an image be different if you have it physically? Do you think it’ll portray what you’ve been thinking all this time?

Do “mental photos” exist? How would you share with others what you see if you could not take photos? Could you start a photography project with the idea to take as few photos as possible?

Do you ever feel lonely or in a strange place of being a conduit to others’ creative process?

I’m doing it by myself but am rarely alone. I’m always working with someone doing something though those things and people change. I’ve gotten a chance to work with so many of my closest friends and so many people I respect, both from Oaxaca and from the US. I feel less like a conduit and more like a beneficiary. I get to take part in all these processes that I never would have been able to otherwise. When I was a kid one project my mother gave us was to make small books profiling different categories of artists — names and biographies of baroque composers, impressionist painters, etc. It was this idea that if you couldn't be a musician and a painter, learning about the lives and work of musicians or painters is the second best thing. That’s kind of my life right now. Loneliness can be hard…but I assume that’s part of being human.

(via Experience as Art: A Trip to Oaxaca with Pocoapoco's Jessica Chrastil | Apiece Apart)

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drinkupthesunrise · 6 years

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May the Fourth Exchange 2018 Letter

Dear Yoda,

General links that might be useful to you: my ao3 works, my fic writing tag, my ficlet tag, and my general star wars tag.

Wedge Antilles/Luke Skywalker

Wedge Antilles/Biggs Darklighter

Wedge Antilles/Leia Organa

Wedge Antilles/Leia Organa/Han Solo Okay so Wedge spends an astonishing amount of time in the X-Wing books putting Han and Leia’s relationship back together (only for The Courtship of Princess Leia to happen, poor guy.) Like. He’s really invested in it. And also half in love with both of them it seems.

I would also be very happy with drunken hook-ups, or Han and Leia accidentally propositioning Wedge.

Wedge Antilles/Bodhi Rook

Wedge Antilles/Lando Calrissian

Wedge Antilles/Mara Jade/Luke Skywalker

Wes Janson/Derek “Hobbie” Klivian

Jagged Fel/Jaina Solo/Zekk

Okay, for those who didn’t go and read all of Legends… Jagged Fel is Wedge Antilles nephew, Jaina Solo was Han and Leia’s daughter, and Zekk was one of Luke’s students. There was a bit of a love triangle going on. However, in many points, it was less of a love triangle, and more… well. They should have all banged.

Key moments include that time Jaina and Zekk were in a hive mind, and got slightly confused over whose memories were whose, leading to this conversation:

Our boyfriend means business, Zekk observed.

Don’t know that it’s him. And it’s old boyfriend.

Right. We’re so over him.

We?

Plourr Ilo/Evaan Verlaine

Wedge Antilles/Col "Fake Wedge" Takbright

#may the fourth #fic writing #fic exchange #okay i think i've covered my bases on everything I want

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