#I think BB made me REALLY fall in love with him. He's my sweet cheese. My good time boy.

[bonefall]

⭕️Hey Bones! Is it ok if you explain and/or elaborate how Crowfeather is abusive to Breezepelt if please?⭕️

I do KNOW that crowfeather is indeed, abusive to Breezepelt, due to the fact that he emotionally and/or physically neglected him - with child neglect being known to BE a form of child abuse - and I also heard that he slashed and/or hit him within one of the books, which I believe is in the book Outcast, in chapter 16.

But I also wish people would talk and be informed about it more within the fandom, because in the parts of the fandom I’ve known portrayed Crowfeather’s neglect on Breezepelt as negative and bad, but not in a way that made me think and/or feel: “Wow, that’s pretty bad. That’s…actually abusive.” I suppose? So I hope more people will talk about it more in that type of way.

Also, please be aware that I have NOT read PoT, OoTS, etc. or barely any warrior cats books, since the majority of the information I got from the series is from the wiki and the fandom, so that probably explains why I didn’t know this part of Crowfeather’s character is as bad as it actually is until now. Also, feel free to talk about Crowfeather’s abuse on Breezepelt I haven’t mentioned and/or don’t know right now as well if you want.

I’m SO sorry that if this ask is unintentionally quite long, and feel free to make sure to take all the time you need to answer it. Thank you!

OH LET'S GOOOO

Breezepelt is both physically and emotionally abused by Crowfeather. I'm not talking about only child neglect; he is screamed at, belittled, and even once hit on-screen.

The fact that Crowfeather both neglected and abused him is very important to the canonical story of Breezepaw. There's actually a lot more to this character than people remember! Even from his first appearances he displays good qualities, a strained relationship with his father and adult clanmates, and is clearly shown to be troubled before we understand why.

As many problems as I have with the direction of Breezepelt's arc (especially Crowfeather's Trial), his setup is legitimately a praiseworthy bit of writing from Po3 which carries over into OotS. To say that Breezepelt was not abused is to completely miss two arcs worth of books SCREAMING it.

BIG POST. Glossary;

INTRO TO BREEZEPELT: The Sight and Dark River

ABUSE: Outcast, Social Alienation, the Tribe Journey.

DARK FOREST: How these factors push him towards radicalization.

For "brevity," I'm not getting into anything post-OotS. I'm just showing that Breezepelt was abused, the narrative wants you to know that he was abused, and that his status as a victim of child abuse is CENTRAL to understanding why he is training in the Dark Forest.

INTRO TO BREEZEPELT: The Sight and Dark River

Our very first introduction to Breeze is when Jaypaw walks off a cliff in the first book of Po3 and is rescued by a WindClan patrol. He's making snarky remarks, and Whitetail and Crowfeather are not happy about it. Whitetail snaps for Crow to teach his son some manners, and Crow growls for Breezepaw to be quiet.

But our proper introduction to him is at his announcement gathering, when Heatherpaw playfully introduces him as a friend,

From the offset something's not entirely right here between Breezepaw and his father. He's cut off by Heatherpaw here, but he's touchy whenever his father is involved, and we're not entirely sure why.

Throughout Book 1, he's just rude, with a notable xenophobic streak. He's a bit of a mean rival character for Lionpaw, as they're both interested in the affections of Heatherpaw and make bids to get her attention, but nothing particularly violent yet.

He participates in the beloved Kitty Olympics and gets buried in liquid dirt with Lionpaw, basically a rite of passage for any arc.

(And Nightcloud has a cute moment where she watches over them until they fall asleep)

As the books progress, the relationship between Crow and Breeze visibly deteriorates. They start from being simply tense with each other in The Sight, to the open shouting and hitting we see in Outcast.

In the very first chapter of Dark River, we learn where his behavioral issues are really coming from;

Crowfeather.

Breezepelt is getting xenophobia from his father. Occasionally he says something bigoted and his dad will agree and chime in, and those are the only positive moments they have together.

(Note: In contrast, Nightcloud explicitly pushes back against xenophobia, chiding Breezepelt for his rudeness to Lionpaw in back in The Sight, Chapter 21. The Sight is the book where a lot of "evidence" that the Evil Overbearing Woman is actually responsible for the rift between father and son but. No. She's not. Though she can be overprotective; Crow and Breeze have a bad relationship when she's not even around in Breeze's first appearance and even his Crowfeather's Trial Epiphany refutes it. Anyway this post isn't about Nightcloud.)

So he starts acting on his bigotry, accusing cats in other Clans of stealing, running really close to the border. What's interesting though, is that this is not entirely his doing. The first time we get physical trouble from Breezepaw, DUSTPELT aggressed it. Breezepaw and Harepaw were just chasing a squirrel and hadn't yet gone over the border at all.

We learn that WindClan is teaching its apprentices how to hunt in woodland, and tensions between the two Clans is starting to escalate as ThunderClan isn't entirely trusting of their intentions.

The second time, fighting breaks out over him and Harepaw actually crossing the border and catching a squirrel. WindClan is adamant that because it came from their land, it's their squirrel. So it's as if Breezepaw is modelling the aggression around him, learning how to behave from the older warriors and his father.

When he joins Heatherpaw and The Three to go find Gorsetail's kits in the tunnels, he's grouchy towards the ThunderClan cats, but very gentle with the kittens. Notably so. When Thistlekit is dangerously cold, he cuddles up next to her, and even assures Swallowkit when she's scared,

Through this entire excursion, he's the one in the comforting roles for the kittens. Breezepaw is the one who is taking time to tell the kits they'll be okay, that he'll protect them, and physically supporting them when they're weak, even when he's terrified.

And it's always contrasted to Heatherpaw who's way more 'disciplined,' as a side note. It's a detail I'm just fond of.

All this to point out,

Breezepelt displays his best qualities when he's away from the older warriors of WindClan, and he's at his worst whenever he's near Crowfeather. Even while he's essentially just a bully character for The Three to deal with. He's gruff but cooperative when it's just him and Heatherpaw interacting with The Three, but mean when there is an adult to please.

We're getting to the on-screen abuse now, but Po3 actually sets up Breezepaw's troubles and dynamics well before it's finally confirmed that he is a victim of child abuse.

ABUSE: Outcast, the Tribe Journey.

In Outcast, Breezepaw's problems have escalated into open aggression towards cats of other Clans, and is now a legitimate concern for his own safety. Yet, he's spoken over by older warriors, and reprimanded at nearly every opportunity, right in front of the warrior of another Clan.

Squilf just asked the poor kid how his training was going, and then Whitetail JUMPS to talk over him so she can complain, RIGHT in front of his face.

They can't even wait until they're alone to grumble something rude about Breezepaw, who is still just a teenager here;

They taught him already that a bit of prey that runs off their own territory still belongs to WindClan, encourage him to blow past borders in pursuit, and started a battle with ThunderClan over this. And then they're pissed off at him for being aggressive, thinking it's deserved to scold him in public.

When Onestar announces that he wants Breezepaw to go on the Tribe Journey, he's devastated by it...

Because he thinks WindClan doesn't like him, and he's right. He's gossiped about, torn into in front of a ThunderClan warrior, and even his own dad doesn't want to be around him. It's clear that Breezepaw's impulsive "codebreaking" behaviors are a desire to prove himself, and once you realize that, the way that he's being alienated is heartbreaking.

But Wait!! Hold on a minute! Where did he get a "patrol of apprentices" from to confront the dogs with, exactly?

Simple. Breezepaw CAN make friends! He actually values them a lot! So much that it's the first thing Crowfeather snaps at him over, out of frustration that his son is also being forced on this journey with him. It's an angry response to his child having emotional and physical needs, resentment that will continue all journey long.

Note that it's plural, friends. Breezepelt has multiple friends, at least one who is not Heatherpaw, and she promises to say goodbye to them.

Up next, they state over and over, Crowfeather and Breezepaw do not like each other. Crowfeather resents being around him and dealing with his rudeness, embarrassed and angry, and Breezepaw is absolutely miserable being sent on a journey to the mountains with a man who hates his guts.

The whole while, Crowfeather is brooding longingly about Feathertail, already thinking about her as soon as he kitty-kisses Nightcloud goodbye, his eyes looking somewhere distant. He makes a jab about loyalty when Breezepaw doesn't understand why they're helping the Tribe.

Breezepaw gets smacked after he's "shoved" at Purdy and acts rude to him, while the other three manage to be polite (while still having internal dialogue about how stinky he is).

Without so much as a, "cut that out," Crowfeather raises his paw and hits him. Breeze is quiet after that.

I don't give a shit how rude your teenager is being. Do not hit kids. Being throttled on the head is not okay.

In spite of the Three not liking Breezepaw, or even Crowfeather, they're constantly noting that their arguments are not normal, and that Crow is a cold, unsupportive father who digs into his kid constantly, and the only time he ever DOES "discipline" his child it's through immediately smacking him.

At one point, the apprentices get hungry, and decide to foolishly hunt in a barn that they know has dogs in it against Purdy's warnings. Once again, JUST like the first two books, Breezepaw is more friendly when Crowfeather is not around.

EVERY time he is alone with cats his own age, he's grumpy but cooperative. Even enthusiastic at times! The minute Crowfeather is in the picture, he's nasty.

Naturally, the dogs show up, but Purdy rescues them. Though Brambleclaw also chews his kids out (and i have strong opinions about bramble's parenting style for another time), Hollypaw is taken aback by the contrast of what a scolding from Brambleclaw looks like vs how Crowfeather reacts.

The narrative is desperately trying to tell you that the way Crowfeather treats his son is not normal.

And then Crowfeather is pissed off that Breezepaw is exhausted from running for his life from hungry dogs,

And he's constantly losing his shit whenever Breezepaw says something as innocuous as "dad im hungry"

Then, Breezepaw is made to watch his dad pine over the grave of a woman who died long before Crowfeather was even considering his mother for a mate. What he feels is jealousy, because he knows his own father doesn't love him anywhere near as much as he loves the memory of Feathertail.

This really goes on and on and on. The ENTIRE trip is like this, with Crowfeather treating Breezepelt poorly, giving him a smack before even verbally warning him, pushing him past his limits and blowing up on him when he asks simple questions about eating or resting.

It all comes to a head in this one exchange, towards the end. Hollypaw ends up snapping at Breezepaw for his rudeness, before having an epiphany.

It's explicit. Crowfeather's emotional abuse, his "scorn" for Breezepelt, is what is driving a wedge between him and all of his older Clanmates. Between EVERYONE in Breezepelt's life who wasn't already his friend. This awful treatment is only making him worse and worse.

Realizing this, she has more sympathy for him, but it's too late. He continues to be rude to her because he feels insulted, and her patience completely runs out. She's just a kid. They're both just kids. She's not responsible for fixing him when he's pushing everyone away at this point.

That's the end of Breezepelt in Outcast. It can't be helped anymore. Any spark of friendship they had together in the barn, or in the tunnels, is gone.

As the series progresses, Crowfeather continues to refuse any personal responsibility for the mistreatment of his son, even pinning all of Breezepelt's behavioral problems on Nightcloud. He is a cold, selfish father who only ever thinks about his own pain and reputation.

DARK FOREST: How these factors push him towards radicalization.

Everyone talks about the Attack on Poppyfrost, which happens in the first book of OotS, in oversimplified terms. YES he is going after a nun and a pregnant woman. I've never said that's not Bad.

But no one talks about "WHY", and that reason is NOT just that he desires power like so many other WC villains. Breezepelt makes his motivation very clear on the page.

Escalating to violence was about making Jayfeather feel the way that he does.

When Breezepelt says that he wants Jay to be surrounded by "lies, hatred, and things that should never have happened," he's talking about the way HE grew up, knowing his father never wanted him, and that his Clan HATES him as a result. Killing Poppyfrost is about trying to frame Jayfeather for her murder, so ThunderClan won't trust him anymore.

When Jayfeather points out the simple truth that what Breezepelt is saying doesn't make any goddamn sense, his hatred "falters." He's blaming his half-clan half-brother for his own treatment because of the reveal, but totally failed to consider that JAYFEATHER'S ALREADY GOING THROUGH IT... so his response is just this pitiful, "s-shut up, man."

Then the ghost of Brokenstar and Breezepelt bounce him back and forth between them like a beach ball for a bit until Honeyfern's spirit shows up.

Breezepelt's childhood abuse and social alienation was a hook that the Dark Forest latched onto, to reel him in. His anger at his half-brother is so obviously misplaced that its absurdity was something Jayfeather pointed out.

We soon learn that it's the Dark Forest who's planting that ridiculous idea in his head;

The narration is SCREAMING, "The Dark Forest is validating the anger he feels towards his father, and redirecting it towards The Three." He's described as 'kitlike,' Tigerstar's eyes are compared to a hypnotizing snake.

This prose could not make it more obvious if it drove to your house, beat you with it, and then spoon fed you the point while you were hospitalized.

At the end of this scene, Tigerstar sends Hawkfrost to recruit Ivypaw. This scene where Breezepelt is being lovebombed, and the command to start grooming Ivypaw, ARE LINKED. That was a choice.

A VERY GOOD choice! Again, as many issues as I have with OotS, its handling of indoctrination is unironically fantastic, and it owes a good amount of that to the outstanding setup of Breezepelt that was done back in Po3. And that setup doesn't work if Crowfeather was merely distant.

Breezepelt was abused by his father, both verbally and physically. It drove him to be more aggressive to prove himself, modeling the battle culture around him. The adults of WindClan judged him based off Crowfeather's responses, shunning and belittling the 'problem' teenager, which eventually drove Breezepelt to the only group that he felt "understood" him.

In a book series that is RIFE with abuse apologia, this is one of the few times that there's any behavioral consequences for abuse and the narrative holds the perpetrator accountable for it.

But people hear Crowfeather's deflective excuse in The Last Hope where he says he never hated him, blames Nightcloud for everything, and just lick it up uncritically.

Gee whiz, I wonder why the guy who never blames himself for any of his problems would suddenly say it was his ex-wife's fault. Real headscratcher!

(Crowfeather's Trial then goes onto, for all my own problems with it, also hold Crow accountable as the reason why Breezepelt turned out like he did. But that's a topic for another day.)

#This is headcanon territory here. But one day I realized I can read Breezy-P with BPD and he became a blorbo. #Never been able to unsee it and it massively endears him to me... Breeze Pelt Disorder... #I actually REALLY hate how his arc was resolved and strongly feel that he should have progressed into a bigger problem #But I equally strongly feel that being redeemed is the ideal ending for him #so if it was between him being pure evil/redemption death or the awful halting we got at the end of oots.... #I'd pick the halting over him being pure evil or a redemption death. #I think BB made me REALLY fall in love with him. He's my sweet cheese. My good time boy. #Bones when he sees an angry black cat: ''i can fix you. first i must break you. but then i can fix you'' #Like. what i dislike about where he went is that even if your anger issues came from abuse. you STILL are responsible for your actions #but in the end getting that Shitty Dad Approval fixes him. Not his own growth or self-reflection. #it feels like BREEZE gets his agency stripped away for HIS ABUSIVE DAD'S character arc #It retcons in a reason why Breezepelt is not still a problem and then he faded into the background. #while Crowfeather continues to get supporting roles and every now and then Breeze now looks at him fondly #BLECH. #Crowfeather #Breezepelt #Abuse #Child Abuse #Warrior Cats Analysis #And now you know anon!!

[golbrocklovely]

cake tasting // colby brock

A/N: so this isn't a request, but i saw this tweet that talked about two ppl who were friends going into a bakery and trying wedding cake, and i just knew i had to write something based off of it. i could only imagine how cute it would be to go and do this with colby, omg. anyway sorry i haven't update anything else yet. i haven't been extremely motivated, but i'm gonna try to write thru out the week and hopefully get something else out to yall soon :) lmk what you think of this. hope you enjoy !!

prompt: you and colby go to a bakery and pretend to be engaged to try wedding cakes. you have a crush on him, but he doesn’t have one on you. or does he…? cuteness ensues.

trigger warning: PURE FLUFF BB, sickeningly sweet

word count: 1535

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Are you sure we should do this?" Colby asked, keeping his eyes on the road.

I rolled my eyes at his nervousness. "Of course! I've done this before."

"How often do you do this?" He snorted, turning to look at me for a moment.

I shrugged nonchalantly. "Occasionally. Mostly when I'm really in the mood for cake but don't know which type I want."

"I just feel bad about it. I feel like I'm stealing." Colby bit his lip uncomfortably.

"Well, I usually end up leaving a nice tip and buying some cupcakes, so it at least seems like I was interested." I replied.

"Wait, how are we gonna pass as a couple?" Colby doubted.

"Did you think I came unprepared?" I lifted my hand to show a big 'engagement' ring.

Colby gasped dramatically. "Jesus, you're gonna make them think I'm made of money with that."

I laughed. "Lucky for you it's fake, much like our impending marriage."

"Whatever you say, Mrs. Brock." He snickered.

We pulled into the parking lot next to our destination, Casey's Bakery. I slid out of my seat and followed Colby. When we got to the front door, Colby opened it for me. With a light bell ring, the immediate smell of baked goods hit me as I stepped inside. I crossed my arm through Colby's, walking up to the counter. A white haired, older woman stood behind the counter, her back to us. She spun around, a sweet smile coming to her face.

“Hello! I'm Casey, welcome to my bakery. What can I do for you two today?” She greeted.

I grinned back happily. “Hi! We were wondering if maybe we could try some samples of your cakes? My fiancé and I are planning our wedding, and we thought we might as well try some cake while we're out.”

“Oh! Is this the fiancé?” Casey guessed.

I nodded lightly. “Yes.”

“That's wonderful, congratulations!” She beamed. “What are your names?”

“I'm Colby, and this is Y/N.” Colby chimed in.

“You two look so young. How old are you?” Casey questioned.

“We're both 23.” I admitted.

“Oh, you're babies! Okay, is there any type of cake you're thinking about for the wedding?” She inquired.

I pursed my lips. “Um... no, not really. The wedding is still a long ways away.”

“When is it?” She asked.

“Ahh, next year... sometime in September. No final date just yet.” I stuttered. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Colby nod.

“Oooh, a fall wedding. Might I suggest trying the carrot cake first then? That's usually our most popular for fall weddings.” Casey informed.

“That sounds great. We'll try that first.” I agreed.

“Goodie. You guys can go take a seat, and I'll be right out with your cake.” She mentioned, smiling.

I returned the smile. “Thank you so much.”

As Casey rushed off to the back, I sat down at the closest table. I finally realized, looking around, that no one else was in the bakery but us.

“How did you come up with that?” Colby queried, surprised.

I raised an eyebrow. “What?”

“The date of our 'wedding'?” He responded.

“I'm good on my feet, what can I say?” I explained smugly.

He shook his head, and then glanced around. “I feel bad. There's no one here.”

“Don't worry. I plan on buying those over there.” I pointed at the cupcakes in the display.

“They do look really good.” He noted.

“And it smells like heaven in here.” I borderline moaned.

Colby cleared his throat, moving in closer to the table. “So... where would you want to get to married, if you could choose?”

“I don't know. Probably on the beach,” I answered. “I've always dreamed of getting married on the beach.”

“That sounds nice. Have you thought about your wedding, like all the little details and whatnot?” Colby gushed brightly.

I cocked my head to the side, almost laughing at him.

“What? Isn't that something most girls do?” He argued jokingly.

“First off, not every girl dreams about their wedding.” I scoffed. “But secondly, yes I have.”

“Who'd you get married to?” He questioned abruptly.

I choked. “Um-”

Casey busted in, cutting me off. “Okay! Sorry about that. I figured I might as well bring out some other samples besides the carrot cake.”

She placed four plates down in front of us. Each had two little sections of cake on it. There was carrot, vanilla, chocolate, and red velvet. I could feel my mouth water as she placed two forks down.

“So, for any cakes that we do make, we can obviously do any form of icing. But traditionally, red velvet and carrot always have cream cheese icing. I do my own little spin on both, of course.” She babbled, giggling. “And then for the vanilla, I did vanilla icing. And the chocolate has chocolate icing as well. Go ahead and dig in.”

I grabbed a fork and sliced a piece of the carrot cake. I took my bite slowly, enjoying the sweetness of the icing, with a hint of cinnamon. I glanced up at Colby as he did the same, his eyes landing on me with a hidden smile.

“This is really good. And I don't usually like carrot cake. But this... so good.” Colby spoke, covering his mouth.

“That's great to hear. And what about you, Y/N?” Casey turned to me.

I praised. “Delicious. I love carrot cake, so this hits the spot.”

“I'm happy you enjoy it. I love a good carrot cake myself,” She confessed. “So, where are you guys planning to get married?”

“In Santa Monica. On the beach.” Colby stated.

My eyes widened, staring at Colby quickly. He gazed over at me, a smirk on his lips.

“A fall wedding on the beach?” Casey puzzled.

“Yeah. It's never really fall here anyway.” Colby commented.

“That is very true,” Casey chuckled. “A beach wedding, huh? That's so fun. What colors?”

“Red and white. And with some black thrown in. For him.” I teased.

“Aww, thanks babe.” Colby winked.

I felt my heart skip a beat for a second. I tried to brush off the butterflies in my stomach as hunger pains.

Casey sang. “You two are adorable! Now, try the vanilla cake. It's our top seller.”

After trying the rest of the cakes, Colby excused himself to go to the restroom. Casey sat down in Colby's seat, scooching in.

“Now I have to ask, how long have you two been together?” She inquired.

“Four years,” I lied. “Basically as long as I've known him.”

“You two already act like an old married couple. I can see how much he cares about you.” She disclosed.

I squeaked. “Really?”

“Oh yeah. It's so noticeable,” She swatted her hand lightly. “He's smitten, and I can see why. You are so sweet to him, and he just can't get enough. It's all in his eyes.”

Casey stood up and slowly cleaned up the plates, as I sat there in silence.

Was Colby really that into me?

Maybe she was lying. But something about her words stuck with me.

I’ve always had a small crush on Colby, ever since I met him. And everyone in our friend group knew about it. I always chalked up my feelings to me just being lonely and him always being there for me. But maybe there was something more in how I felt for him. The idea of marrying Colby didn’t seem bad at all. If anything, it was something I could see maybe happening. I mean, we were really close. And our friends always joked about us being a couple. Maybe they weren't jokes after all.

But does he even like me like that?

“Did you order the cupcakes, Y/N?” Colby’s voice broke my thoughts.

I stared up at him, stumbling. “Hmm? What? I-uh, no. I didn't.”

Colby’s dimples appeared as he chuckled at the fumbling of my words. “Okay. I'm gonna go order them then.”

I nodded, slowly standing up and grabbing my purse. I walked over to him, watching him pay for the cupcakes.

“Well, when you're ready to place an order for your cake, you let me know.” Casey addressed, handing Colby a business card and the cupcakes.

Colby assured. “Of course, Casey. Thank you so much for the samples.”

“And thank you for being such a fine gentleman. You take good care of Y/N, you hear?” She patted the counter near me.

He laughed softly, the both of us beginning to leave. “Absolutely. Have a nice day.”

“Same to you. Goodbye, my little love birds!” Casey waved.

We walked out of the bakery and back onto the busy street. Everything felt strange around me, like I just woke up from a dream.

Back to reality, I guess.

“She was... fun.” I remarked happily.

“Yeah, definitely.” He smiled, getting into his car. “I know what bakery I'm coming to if I do get married.”

I sat down, putting the cupcakes on the floor next to my feet. “We'll have to do this again sometime.”

Colby turned to me, his eyes snaking up my body and finally stopping on my face with a click of his tongue.

“Whatever you say, Mrs. Brock.”

#colby brock #colby brock fluff #colby brock x reader #colby brock fanfic #colby brock fic #colby brock fanfiction #colby brock oneshot #colby brock one shot

[shishinoya]

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆ — REQUEST || “Can I request some soft hcs for Oikawa, Suga and Akaashu comforting their gfs when they are having one of those trashy days where every single inconvenience makes them want to cry?” — anon — PAIRING || Akaashi Keiji X Reader, Oikawa Tooru X Reader, Sugawara Koushi X Reader — TYPE || Headcanons — WARNING || just heart cutting fluff — WORD COUNT || NA — AUTHOR’S NOTE || auscbaisjncoa i kinda have one rn bUTTTT writing this made me feel so much better cuz i was just imagining it :eyes: ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

》 Ah, Akaashi.

》 The lover

》 Dude, I don’t even think you can feel down when you’re with Akaashi

》 He makes you feel so loved and worth that honestly, it’s hard to have these types of days

》 As it should be! >:( You should feel loved!!

》 But they do happen and Akaashi is prepared every time they do

》 He notices them quite early on because of your loud sighs, staring off into the distance, and ruffling of your hair

》 He has his eyes on you 24/7 babyyyy

》 He’ll get you to drop whatever you are doing, and just either sit down with him on the couch or lay next to him

》 If it’s on the couch, he’ll sit you on his lap, your legs around his waist and your face towards his, and just looks into your eyes

》 He’ll brush light touches on your cheek with his thumb in a loving and caring manner

》 As he presses his forehead against yours, he whispers sweet affirmations about how much he loves you and how much he values your time together

》 He says things like “I appreciate everything you do for me”, “I love every inch of you and everything you do”, “Thank you for staying by my side”

》 Sometimes you place your head on his shoulder as he rubs soothing circles along your back

》 This calms you down and even manages to make you tired

》 You fall asleep in his arms owo

》 If you lay next to him, he would pull you close into his chest and start petting your hair

》 One arm is wrapped around your body while the other encases your head

》 His natural body scent mixed with the faint smell of his body wash helps ease your emotions and relaxes you

》 He becomes much more affectionate and physical with you during these times and will try to touch you with gentle fingers

》 No words really need to be exchanged because his actions make up for the silence

》 Ah, I’m getting soft uwu

》 Akaashi is really calm and caring during these situations and he will make sure that you are feeling 101% better after it

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

》 A cinnamon roll!!!

》 Suga is like a big momma

》 He will be attentive 25/8

》 He notices that you get frustrated more often and even the smallest strand of hair that won’t stay in place, gets on your nerves

》 Those tears will start sprouting and mama bear mode: activate!

》 He will sit you down and attempt to calm you down

》 He’s a listener, so he will look at you with empathetic and considerate eyes as you pour your heart out to him

》 Anything, even if you think it’s dumb to be sad about, he will listen to everything

》 Holds your hand as comfort and runs his fingers over your knuckles

》 Lots of kissies too

》 On your temple, your hand, cheek, lips

》 His kisses make all the boo boos go away

》 He lets you sleep either on him or having your head on his lap

》 As you’re talking, he just admires the outline of your face and the way your hair falls

》 When you are done, he will offer you words that make your heart swell and will also ask if there is anything he could do

》 If you are stressing over work or school, he will try and assist you with whatever he can, he just doesn’t want to see you down like this

》 Will also cook meal for you too

》 Your favourite meals? He already researched the whole internet, asked your family, and tested over 50 times just to make it perfect for you. So, he always has the ingredients ready

》 Suga is a big mom and is there for you all the time, just like how a real mom would be uwu

☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

》 HE’S A CRACKHEAD SUCAN

》 He would be the one that would wrap you up in a blanket

》 It legit that thing where you wrap up the sad person in a blanket like a burrito, lay the burrito next to you, hug the sad person, and then feed the sad person

》 You are sad person

》 He is such a flirt so I think sometimes he doesn’t really realize if you are sad or feeling down

》 But his comment do make you kinda smile

》 Like what he says is so cringy that it kinda hurts

》 “Volleyball is just hardcore hot potato”, “If two people read each other’s mind, whose mind are they reading?”, “Butter is just food lotion”

》 It’s so stupid that they make you smile

》 He’s just like ???

》 When he does realize you are sad, he will try to be the loving boyfriend, but he kinda fails

》 He makes you laugh though

》 He’s good at that

》 He’s trying ;-;

》 He’ll run a warm bath for you and just assumes what would make you feel better

》 Calls Iwa for backup to be honest

》 Lots of hugs 

》 He likes hugs so; therefore, you should like hugs too

》 Holds you and sways until you calm down or cannot breathe

》 Either way, he’s done his job

》 Oikawa is a shitshow, but he never fails to make you smile

cheese cult bbs ❤ : @akaashichigo @drainedjaz @haikkeiji @annalyn-annalyn @writingsbycrackhead @sosugasweet @cali-writes-sometimes  @simping4ratsumu @ushiwakaa @from-left-to-write @akaashit-baeji  @kxgeyamasmilk @agaassi @hanibuni @cupofkenma  @kawanisshi @milkandc00kiez @thiccbokuto @shinsukestan @sufiawrites​ @wakaitoshi @skyguy-peach @fern-writes-ig @briswriting @miyuswriting @raevaioli​

#haikyuu #haikyuu!! #hq #hq!! #haikyuu x reader #x reader #reader insert #imagine #headcanons #headcanon #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu headcanons #akaashi #akaashi keiji #akaashi x reader #akaashi keiji x reader #oikawa #oikawa tooru #oikawa x reader #oikawa tooru x reader #suga #sugawara #sugawara x reader #sugawara koushi #sugawara koushi x reader #akaashi imagine #oikawa imagine #sugawara imagine #akaashi headcanons #oikawa headcanons

[johnny-and-dora]

kiss in the kitchen like it’s a dancefloor

46. “i caught the bouquet” requested by the loml sara @macperalta!!! used a harry styles lyric just for you bb 💐💕

read on ao3 -

Jake wouldn’t call himself a domestic god, per-say.

He supposes that his best efforts to haphazardly fold laundry qualify him for at least a bronze in the boyfriend category, although he anxiously suspects he’s somehow done it wrong. The silverware that he’s laid out all fancy and the pizza he’s shoved in the oven in anticipation of Amy’s arrival should score him some hefty bonus points, though. And the fact that he even attempted to vacuum earlier means he must be eligible for some sort of domesticity award at least.

(The celebratory domestic bagel he ate afterwards may have resulted in him getting crumbs all over the carpet again, but it’s the thought that really counts.)

So maybe he’s not quite god-level yet – really, he’s only doing the bare minimum of what’s expected of a functioning adult/good boyfriend/super sexy roommate. But he’s kept their apartment relatively clean in Amy’s two-day absence. He even remembered to use coasters and where she keeps the fabric softener. In short, he is the champion of total domestic bliss.

Jake grins as he pours two glasses of red wine and fist pumps at not spilling a drop on Amy’s favourite fancy tablecloth, knowing that she’ll be home in a matter of minutes and find a nice, non-takeout candlelit dinner waiting for her. He steps back to admire his handiwork – there’s even a full salad bowl, which he has no intention of eating from – and smiles, content. He’s totally marriage material.

As if on cue, he hears Amy’s key in the lock. She barely has time to kick off her shoes before he’s practically tackling her, revelling in the sweet sound and feel of her laugh buzzing against her lips as she melts into his embrace.

“Hey, babe.” She says sweetly, a knowing and loving glint in her eye. “Did you miss me?”

“Maybe a little.” Amy rolls her eyes, but then her gaze leaves his and lands on their dining room table, just visible over his shoulder. When they unfurl from each other her expression has gone all soft and he can’t help but feel some scattered embers of pride start to flicker and spark, putting his nerves at ease.

(After all this time, he still worries about being too much sometimes – but any fear or doubt usually crumbles when he looks to her and realises he must be doing something right.)

“What’s all this?”

“Dinner.” He says, a little shy, rocking back and forwards on his heels slightly. “I thought you deserved something nice after the drive from Jersey.”

“Oh, this is perfect.” She leans up on the balls of her feet to kiss him – for all his love of her sensible work boots and her strappy heels, he’d hide them all to spend more time savouring their height difference. “Thank you, Jake.”

“It’s no big deal. How was the wedding?” He asks as they move to the kitchen and he hands her a glass of wine. She hums in content, leaning back against the counter.

“It was beautiful. Almost beautiful enough to distract me from my entire extended family asking probing questions about my love life.” She teases, reaching out to playfully poke his shoulder.

“Sorry,” Jake says gingerly, feeling a sting of disappointment at the thought of leaving her at the latest Santiago wedding without a date. He had actually really been looking forward to meeting the rest of Amy’s brothers and a whole swarm of other relatives, but an ill-timed new lead and a crucial stakeout had put a wrench in that plan at the last minute.

“It’s not your fault, babe. You know I would have cancelled if it had been me. Besides, I showed them some cute pictures of us and that shut them up. My aunt thinks you’re adorable.”

“Oh, well I’ll have to give her a call.”

“I also…might have…caught the bouquet.” She says sheepishly, her gaze hooded and apprehensive. It takes a second for his brain to hurry up and realise what that means, and his heart does a funny thing where it trips up on itself. Sort of like mentally slipping on a banana peel.

The whole weird who’s getting married next thing. Which isn’t a problem, actually – if anything it works in his favour, because the plan absolutely is for them to get married. He would propose here and now if he’d found the right ring yet (Gina has been unsurprisingly unhelpful in all four of the jewellery places they’ve visited so far) and if he didn’t have the beginnings of a really dope proposal plan that he really wants to pull off.

“Oh, really?” He has this irrational fear that his voice might have jumped up two octaves, but thankfully it remains even enough, yet still making it very clear that he’s trying to remain as casual as possible.

“Yep. In front of my entire extended family. Who then proceeded to give me embarrassing knowing looks for the rest of the evening.”

“Sounds fun.”

“Oh, it was the best.”

They share a grin, but it’s still hanging in the air. Amy’s still looking at him in that shy, uncertain way, as if she doesn’t already know that she’s the love of his life, and that absolutely won’t do at all.

“Well, you know what that means.”

“…I do?”

“Yep. You better get the binder started now.” His heart is in his mouth as he’s saying it, because it’s not a proposal but it’s a hey I’d love to get married someday soon and that’s only slightly less terrifying. He feels like he should be holding some flowers at least, or else anything else but a dishcloth.

But he’s smiling, smiling, and then her eyes get this glowing shiny quality as she smiles back that just really makes Jake want to kiss her, so he does. And it doesn’t feel scary at all, giving some voice to the visions he’s had of Amy with a ring on her finger he’s been having since late April.

It just makes him feel even more like the champion of domestic bliss when he’s crowding her up against the kitchen island he thoroughly dusted earlier and he knows he wants this forever.

“I may or may not have possibly made some vague wedding-related outlines on the flight home.”

“That’s so hot.”

The oven timer goes off before they can get into any specifics, which is good because the whole of Brooklyn can probably hear Amy’s stomach growling, and because he’s about two seconds away from keeling over with joy if they talk about their hypothetical wedding any longer.

It’s not like he ever really doubted that the feeling wasn’t mutual. But knowing that Amy’s thought about it, that she has a vague outline somewhere just as he has a few plans and ideas hastily typed at 3am on his phone, knowing that she wants to be married to him someday – it’s a warmth, a security, a rare kind of love that he can’t quite put into words.

It doesn’t come up again for the rest of the evening. Instead, they clink their wine glasses together and dance while they do the dishes and make-out on the couch until it’s time for bed. Amy laughs while Jake regales tales of Charles bringing an actual portable cheeseboard to their stakeout, and Jake listens as she fills him in on the latest scandalous Santiago family gossip, gasping in the all the right places.

It’s not until he’s staring up at the ceiling, waiting for sleep to crash over him that he even remembers the subject coming up – quietly, tentatively, he listens out in the quiet, still darkness of their bedroom to see if Amy’s still awake.

“Hey, Ames?”

“Mmm?”

“You…you know that I’m all in, right? Like this is it, for me. You and me. I mean you probably already knew that, I just wanted to double-check because of what we talked about before, and I thought-“

“I do know.” She says softly, a soothing balm to his thundering heart. “And you should know that it’s the same for me.”

“Cool.” He says, a little breathless, easily overwhelmed. “I love you. And hey, I promise not to miss our wedding for a stupid stakeout with Charles and his obscure cheeses.”

“That’s all I ask.” She says mock-seriously, shifting closer to him as he laughs and knows that he is truly home whenever she is beside him.

That night, Jake falls asleep with a smile on his face, content with knowing that he may not be a domestic god, but Amy still wants to marry him, so that’s got to count for something.

He’s always valued her opinion more than anyone else’s anyway.

#b99 #b99 fic #peraltiago #jake x amy #brooklyn 99 #happy anniversary to these nerds #god i love them #shut up sian #my writing

[dontshootmespence]

Autumn Breeze

A/N: An anon request for a Jemily piece that takes place in the fall, shortly after she breaks up with Will. @coveofmemories @sexualemobitch @jamiemelyn @unstoppableangel8 @lukeassmanalvez @rmmalta @marvelfanlife @amarislestrange @obsessed5sosfreak @sonhadoraativa @1enchantedfantasy1 @ace-and-rosey @blakendores @twelveyearoldchildprodigy @offbrandcursewords @entelechysymphony @milkandcookies528 @pugs-cats-bb-8 @davidr0ssi @sarahkay-19 @obsessedwithbadasswomen

                                                               ----

“So, you and daddy don’t love each other anymore?” Henry asked. The four-year-olds eyes went wide with sadness. 

JJ shook her head and crouched down to meet her son eye-to-eye. “Daddy and I will always love each other,” she assured him. “We just aren’t in love anymore.”

“What’s the difference?” She laughed under her breath at the over-exaggerated look of confusion plaguing his features.

As a mother, she wanted to tell her son that she and her Daddy would get back together, but over their five years together they’d been away from each other so often that they both found themselves falling out of love with each other. “In love is a romantic feeling. While love can be something that’s felt between mommies and daddies, or friends, and lots of other relationships, like mothers and sons.” She poked his nose and made him laugh, feeling a little bit better about the whole situation. She knew Henry would ask eventually, but she’d been dreading the moment. “I will always love Daddy, because he gave me you, but we don’t love each other romantically anymore.”

“Oh,” he said. He nodded his head, so it must’ve suddenly clicked. “Okay.”

“We will always love you though.”

“Are you in love with someone else, Mommy?” Will had just recently introduced Henry to his new girlfriend; she was a really sweet woman that worked in a local doctor’s office. 

After coming to terms with the realization that she was no longer in love with Will, and how much that actually hurt, she never imagined she’d be moving on, but then she realized it was because of what she was feeling that she’d fallen out of love with Will in the first place.

Emily.

“I don’t know,” JJ told her son honestly. “I think so. But I don’t know how they feel about me, so I don’t know if anything is going to happen.”

They were on their way to Henry’s nanny’s apartment. JJ had planned to drop him off so she could go out with Emily for a little while and discuss how she was feeling; she wondered if Emily knew. “Is it a boy or a girl? They should love you...or be IN love with you. You’re awesome.”

“It’s a girl and thank you, baby,” she laughed as she knocked on the door of the nanny’s apartment. “I hope she thinks so too.”

After giving Henry a million and one kisses, she walked back toward her car, the chill, crisp breeze nipping at her skin, causing her to hug her oversized, cream-colored sweatshirt closer to her frame. It was a beautiful day. The sun was out in full force and there was barely a cloud in the sky. It was a bit on the cold side, but that was how she loved it. Emily had mentioned it being her favorite season years back, and how she loved to go apple picking once the air began to cool. That’s where she planned to take her; she was already trying to woo her. God, she hadn’t felt this way in a while. 

A short drive later, she found herself clutching the sweatshirt tighter as she waited for Emily to come downstairs. When she appeared at the passenger side window, it nearly took JJ’s breath away. On top, Emily was wearing a plaid short sleeve shirt with a white cable knit sweater over it and a brown infinity scarf. Her jeans hugged her curves perfectly and her brown boots complemented the scarf. “Hey, JJ,” she said, shivering a bit from the cold. The weather had changed rather drastically; JJ had to admit that. “Why you looking at me like that?”

“You look cute.” She stuttered nervously and pulled away from the curb, falling into conversation about where they were going and what they’d be doing. 

“Apple picking!” Emily squealed. “Yay! I haven’t been in so long.”

“That’s why I figured it would be nice.” JJ pointed toward the back seat, where she left a picnic basket filled with wine and cheese for them to eat along the way. With that and apples, it would be the best meal either of them had had in a while. Running around with Henry and on cases didn’t allow for the best of eating habits. Cheetos did not make a good meal no matter how often she ate them.

Thankfully, JJ had avoided the subject of having feelings for Emily the entire way there, and about 30 minutes later, they’d arrived on the outskirts of town at the state’s best orchard. “Oh my god, I’m so happy!” Emily said as she got out of the car and linked her arm in JJ’s.

Ahead of them stood a vast orchard brimming with autumn enthusiasts thankful to be able to wear oversized sweatshirts and boots rather than shorts and flip-flops. The trees were slowly turning from green to various shades of yellow, orange and red - the colors cascaded together like the most beautiful of sunsets. “Ready?”

“More than ready,” Emily replied, clapping as the two started to walk into the orchard away from the other patrons. 

For nearly an hour, they picked apples off the trees, careful to pick only the best ones; JJ really wanted to make some apple pies later. They walked around arm-in-arm in near silence just taking in the beauty that occurred during the change of the seasons. Many times, when Emily would reach up to grab an apple, JJ found herself taking in Emily’s beauty. She always thought Emily was beautiful; Jj could recognize a beautiful woman when she saw one, but more recently, in the last year or so, her smile gave JJ butterflies, the way her hips swayed made her weak, and her general enthusiasm for life in the face of all they saw gave JJ hope. 

All of a sudden, Emily’s stomach growled. “You said you had wine and cheese in that picnic basket?” She asked happily. “Can we go back to the car and get it because I didn’t eat breakfast this morning. I only had coffee and now my stomach is angry with me.”

“Sure,” JJ laughed.

They returned to the car, grabbed the picnic basket and then found an area near the far end of the orchard to sit for a while. JJ laid out the blanket, feeling the teenage nerves of a girl in love as the warm blue blanket floated to the ground. Emily went to pay for a small batch of apples so they could eat them now and came back to a full wine cup and delicious brie and crackers. “This is fucking delicious,” Emily mumbled. 

JJ swallowed hard. She really needed to get this over with. She had to know and considering they’d already had their fun, if things didn’t go well, they could just leave. “I know, and these apples are great. I need to make pie later.” For a few more moments, she hesitated, but then the words started to fall out of her mouth before she could filter them. “Em, there’s something I need to tell you.”

“Yea?” Emily didn’t miss a beat, continuing to eat her apple and cheese with joy. “What is it?”

“When Will and I broke up, I couldn’t really understand why. I couldn’t figure out why I’d fallen out of love with him. A few months later, I figured out what it was.”

Emily slowed down her eating, a redness forming on her face. JJ couldn’t figure out whether it was the crisp breeze or a blush, but she pushed forward. “I’d fallen out of love with Will because I was falling...for you.”

She couldn’t bare to look up for fear of what she’d see, but then she saw Emily’s hand cover her own. “I was wondering that,” she said softly. She moved closer to JJ, their thighs now touching; the warmth of her body was welcomed against the breeze. “I’ve loved you forever.” She smiled nervously and JJ’s shoulders relaxed; the tension she’d been holding was insane. “It was just that by the time I realized it, you were already with Will, and you were so happy, I didn’t want to ruin that. And then you got pregnant and I wouldn’t wish that away for anything because I fucking love that kid.”

JJ snorted, a tear stinging at the corner of her eye as she buried her face into Emily’s shoulder.”But when you broke up with him, I figured I’d try and find a time to tell you how I felt and I could never do it. Every time I did, I felt like I wanted to vomit and backed out of it, and-”

“Breathe,” JJ laughed, pressing her finger against Emily’s lips. “You’re rambling. You’re starting to sound like Reid.”

“Oh my god, I am.”

That sent two into a fit of laughter that took them nearly 10 minutes to recover from. “My point is, I’ve loved you for a long time,” Emily said eventually. “And if you want to give this a try, a romantic relationship, I’d...I’d really love that.”

As cheesy as it felt, JJ felt her heart soar. “Me too.” Emily picked up her wine glass and brought up to JJ’s, toasting to whatever was to come. With that out in the open, silence fell between them once again, except this time it was comfortable. 

JJ slunk her hand into Emily’s and leaned up against her shoulder, saying nothing, and instead taking in the afternoon sun as it played against the trees, the children running around happily picking up apples and bringing them back to their parents, and others like them, allowing new love to blow in with the autumn breeze.

#jennifer jareau #emily prentiss #jemily #otp: blackbird #jennifer jareau x emily prentiss #dontshootmespence #autumn breeze

[wendylewis-blog]

05.01.2020 /The Weekend

I feel more animal. I sleep when it’s dark and get up with daylight. I forage my house for food when I’m hungry and often, let myself feel that hunger without satiating it. I’m more acutely aware of what’s around me—wandering the woods, walking the river, sitting in the dry prairie grasses. The wind, pollen scattering from the trees, birdsong, chattering squirrels, elegant deer and awkward turkeys. Hoards of gnats swarm in tiny tornados near the water—I wonder if they hold a consciousness about their purpose here. I wonder if I do. 

I talk to people much less than I did in the beginning. Everything has been said too many times over. Exhausting and erosive. It’s becoming more personal now; taking each other’s spiritual temperature, reconnecting with some ppl I’ve lost over time, like a woman in NYC and another in San Franciso, both with new babies. Sometimes, we’re cynical, sometimes laughing, sometimes weeping. I’m quieter than ever and if you know me, I’m not prone to silence. It feels like getting to know a part of myself less explored. Not a bad thing. Listening more, talking less. 

This morning’s soundtrack. 

There is rain moving in. I’m sitting in my dining room facing the south side of the yard watching the sturdiness of trees against a grey backdrop. They wave their branches a little. I’ve looked at these trees out this window for twenty-two years. They give me a false sense of permanence but unless virulent summer weather takes them down some time, I will lean into that ruse. 

It’s the first day of May. My oldest daughter Hannah will turn 34 in a week. She and her husband Geoffrey and g-bb Ezra came down to our house last Saturday. I hugged them both with a bedsheet between us. I had so many conflicting feelings seeing them after almost two months and keeping prescribed distance for the afternoon—the full range existing between joy and grief. I suffered an emotional hangover the next day. It’s so hard to explain. It’s surreal to watch them from across the yard while the dogs romp together and not get gob-smacked about this new reality we are saddled up into—how this contagion (and the ones that will surely follow) will distort/contort, forever changing our intimacies. I’ll have to think more about this. 

We have always been such a tactile family and this is taking time to get used to and it’s only just begun. I’m gonna give myself all the time necessary to acclimate. It was so incredible to see them after so long, if bittersweet. 

I had similar feelings when daughter Kitty and her roommate Anna came down the following Monday to gather kindling, take a walk and stay for dinner. I spent a couple hours prior to their arrival instigating a yearly ritual—opening the porch! We put all the leaves in the table to properly distance ourselves. I thought about how to share the food. I ladled the soup into the sitting bowls, split the French bread loaf in half and wrapped separately, gave them their own dish of salt and plate of butter. We made mistakes—shared the pepper grinder and all touched the tubs of yogurt and sour cream. Ohhh well—we washed our hands afterwards. We also talked and laughed our asses off until dark. When they were leaving, Kitty and I looked at each other and suddenly hugged without the sheet, turning our faces away, not breathing. The next morning I woke up and had a moment of subdued panic until I remembered that every time I leave my house and go to the grocery store, it’s a risk. 

These are the inescapable truths we are all being forced to reckon with in one way or another. In that moment, the gain was well worth the risk. I am gonna get more used to this eventually and do my best taming the wild range of emotional geography to something less painful and more often flushed with gratefulness that we are all alive and love each other. Pull it together, Lewis! 

I’ve been trying to order seeds on line for weeks. Most of the organic sites were filling commercial orders in lieu of home gardeners’ requests, stalling us until May. Now, most everything is unavailable, especially herbs, which are expensive to buy in the produce section. I guess I have to take a deep breath and roll with it. There’s a lot we all have to roll with. I’m not an avid gardener anyway but I did love how the bush beans grew last year and fed us all summer long, planted in succession. 

I’ve emerged, at least for now, from the hopeless/helpless place I’d been in last week. I decided to curb my drinking habits, which had become something of a crutch a couple weeks ago that collapsed under my own weight and fed my sad monster. I’m going to need all my available faculties to get to the next day and the next one, not fall victim to laziness or inflamed feeling, already tender. So, cutting back. It’s been pretty easy so far. 

Meanwhile, there are important issues to focus my anger and intention towards when it rears up—an endless stream, most recently; Pence not wearing a mask when he visited the Mayo Clinic in Rochester MN, Trump suggesting ultra violate rays and disinfectant injections as a cure and then later saying he was being sarcastic (!**/?!#@%!!?), joining up with Stacy Abrams out of GA and the Fair Fight organization to protect our voting rights and democracy in the upcoming election. I also watched (Michael Moore presents) Planet of the Humans written/directed by Jeff Gibbs. Warning: brutal, informative, a li’l craycray (fact checking review here as ballast). 

Also, watched a Frontline piece on Amazon’s Jeff Bezos. What a supreme, soulless dick! Yikes! I knew, kinda, but have never gone in for the longer story. I know—it would be difficult for some, because—so convenient—but what if we just stopped ordering from that megalomaniac, ceased to fill the pockets of the richest man in the world whose mistreatment of his workers is legendary? He would be the best first place to start reorienting our rote thinking about capitalism. Done with him. 

What if we supported our local stores, local restaurant take-out, local clothing and sundries stores (most sell online now) or shopped directly to companies online instead of going through the infamous Amazon? What if we used this time to begin to unhook from the corporate rank and file consumerism we have all been brainwashed with, and started supporting each other and small businesses? Hearing that Tyson is suffering an enormous rise in workers infected with Covid due to cramped and unsafe working conditions (!!!) what if we supported local co-ops even part of the time? I know they are a little more expensive, but if you go local and not Whole Foods, you’ll do better. I did hear that Farmers Markets may open soon and those offer the most affordable options to Cub or Rainbow. I’ve lived and shopped this way for a long time and never made much money so I’m just sayin’, you actually can afford it. 

Every time we spend our money, we are casting a vote, so this is a good time to explore and support the neighborhood both near us and small companies online instead of supporting the giant corporate machine. They are not helping us as much as they make it appear. Other than Costco (my only big box store), who pay their workers a living wage with good benefits and safe work environments (in addition to offering remarkable dry goods, produce, meats and cheeses, the rest are forever off my list. They offer so many organic options and I save so much $$ there. I admit, it’s not much fun to go there—especially right now in terms of exposure—but when I’m out of paper towels and coffee or need a bag of lemons for $6 and organic ground beef, they are my go-to. 

This week’s movie recommendations. Kitty brought The Midnight Gospel, an animated, spirited, crazy, philosophical ride on the human condition from the makers of Adventure Time. You don’t have to be a Dylan fan to enjoy No Direction Home, a documentary that centers on Dylan’s trajectory (copious interview time with him and others around him) from late 50′s-70′s and beyond. If that’s not your cup of tea, check out Ricky Gervais’ AfterLife in which he deals with the fallout of grieving his beloved wife in that sweet/irreverent way he is known for—the second season now available. Also, Devs (recommended by Al Church) is really good, but if you can’t do violence, steer clear. All of these are streaming on Netflix. 

Last post, I was thinking hard about employing more acceptance and open-mindedness. I’m still there and working on it as I wrestle my uncaged  sometimes savage emotions. I check in on many of you via our only source of communication and it seems we are all on the same rollercoaster. It’s a rough ride—hang on and, when you’re fed up or feel brave or are awash in a weird kind of joy, raise your hands off the bar and into the air. 

While we may be isolated, we are not alone. 

Lovelove. 

[obsessedbybucky]

do all the questions :x (now i'm the small dick with a lot of balls)

Here I did them all bb

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?There's this guy I've been talking to for more or less three weeks and I've gone to see him at his job and chill with him and all and he looked interested. He even asked me to come hang out by his place this morning. It was the single most boring morning I've ever had. We didn't do anyhing, kiss/sex/etc, and all he did was talk and drink and smoke and play with his tattoo things, idk man. Then he tells me he's going to sleep and I'm ???? Ok??? So I left, and before I left he told me he would text me when he woke up. He didnt. Idk man.

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?The only person that's ever done that to me was one of my best friend's ex I fucked on his birthday. He was sweet. My best friend was happy for us but it didn't work so

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?Nah fam

4: Do you find it easy to trust others?Very

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?Sleeping and I received a text from my friend saying her significant other was just being diagnosed with cancer.

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?Me, myself and I probably

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?Probably nothing lmao

8: Are you close with your dad?Haven't seen him in a decade

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?Damn I wish

10: What are you listening to?Some NSYNC

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?Mcdonald's Caramel Iced Coffee

12: Do you like hickeys?Never had one

13: What time do you go to bed?Around 9 am

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?544444444444444rThis is kinda sad but my best friend. Also Lucas but fuck Lucas.

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?Not really lmao

16: Do you always answer your texts?Depends on who's texting

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?Yeah man. What he did what unnecessary and uncalled for.

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?Some hours ago

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?Probably my best friend. And up until yesterday morning, it was the guy from question 1

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?"I hope he really will text me later"

21: Is anyone else in the room with you?Nope

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?Yeah man

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?Yeah, I was at the peak of my happiness

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?So many people man

25: In the past week, have you cried?I don't remember tbh

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?Grey, black and blue

27: Do people ever call you by your last name?When I was younger

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?The guy from question 1

29: Do you have a best friend?I have two

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?Yeah, even though it was a whole month ago and I know he wants nothing to do with me

31: Who was your last call/text message from?One of my two best friend

32: Are you mad at anyone?So many people tbh

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?I only ever kissed one person that was younger than me

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?23 or 24, I'm not sure

35: How many more days until your birthday?92 days

36: Do you have any summer plans yet?Not really

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?Not really

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?Yep

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?Yep

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?Ah man, so many times

41: Do you think age matters in relationships?Depends, really

42: Are you available?As fuck

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?at least 5, not sure if there's more though

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?I want my lip piercing back

45: Do you believe exes can be friends?Hell to the nope

46: Do you regret anything?So many things man

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?The fact that my best friend's significant other's got cancer and the dude from question 1. In between these questions I went to a McDonald's to get some iced coffee and I wanted to get some cigarettes and he works at the gas station next to it and I knew he finished at 7 and it was past 7 so I went to go there but I saw him so I noped the fuck out and I told my sister to get my cigs for me and he told her he saw me nope the f out on my way there. it's been 45 minutes, I thought he would text me to ask me why but nah. He just doesnt give a fuck man, depresses me.

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?Yeah

49: Was your last kiss a mistake?Not really, he was the most gorgeous person I've ever kissed. Even though he was a real asshole afterwards, 18/10 would do it again

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?I don't think he likes me, he actually made it pretty clear.

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?Yep. Some awkward story, let me tell you

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?He works at my job so if we work together he talks to me, idk

53: What was the last thing you ate?Cookies

54: Did you get any compliments today?No, which is a shame bc look at me, i'm gorgeous

55: Where are you going on your next vacation?Back to Montreal bitchessssss

56: Do you own anything from other countries?Yeah, some things I bought when I was in New York. The other things are from ebay and shit.

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?Girls

58: Where have you lived most of your life?Charlevoix, Quebec, Canada, which is disgusting

59: When was the last time you took a long drive?Last weekend

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?No???? And I dont know why???

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?Nope

62: Who do you text the most?My best friend

63: What was the last movie you saw?Begin Again I think, of Me Before You

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?Have no bf/gf

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?Lmao under 0

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?Nope

67: Do you curse around your parents?I do

68: Are you happy with where you live?Kinda

69: Picture of yourself?Nah

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?I don't even really believe in relationships tbh. I'm 18 and never had any

71: Have you ever been dumped?We weren't in a relationship but it did felt like I was dumped real hard

72: What do you most like about making out?The touching and the kissing, idk, I just love everything about it.

73: Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?Lmao always

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?Them

75: What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?The stomach. If they have abs, there's 96% chance I'd bang them

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?My best friend

77: Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?Lmao yeah

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?Happened once

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?When someone kisses me

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?Yeah why not

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?Yeah, awkward

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?YEAH LMAO

83: Do you miss your last sweetie?No, fuck that fucktard

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?Never

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?Nope, except when I was like 11

86: How can I win your heart?Be attractive and give me compliments.

87: What is your astrological sign?Taurus

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?Sleeping man

89: Do you cook?Does mac and cheese count?

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?Yeah omg weirdly

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?Sometimes yes, but then I remember I'm a hoe that wants to fuck a lot of people so

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?Let's put it like that, I've only ever had sex with the same person more than once once, and I did him twice.

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?I'm very superficial tbh, I like twinks. I love it when they're small.

94: Name four things that you wish you had!A beautiful person to fuck withAt least 2k$A penis and no boobs sometimesFriends tbh

95: Are you a player?I am

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?I think the most I did was like 4 different people in one evening. Wasn't even playing spin the bottle or anything

97: Are you a tease?yeah

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?No :(

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?Nope

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?Yeah

101: Hugs or Kisses?Kisses

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?yeah

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?The ass or the stomach

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?yep

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?Yeah I'm a hoe

106: Do you flirt a lot?yep

107: Your last kiss?Okay so I was out at a bar with some friends and when the bar closed, I got my cellphone and I saw this dude from work texted me and I answered and he replied instantly back. Some friends wanted to go up to this dude's hotel room and I didn't wanna and I couldn't find a taxi. So I drunk called the dude and asked him to come and get me. Which he did. Lots of shit were said during the hella long car drive and once we were at my place, I don't really remember if I kissed him before the bj happened but I definitely kissed him before he got out of my apartment. So yeah.

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?lmao way more

109: Have you kissed anyone in the past month?The dude from 107

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?Justin Timberlake or Dylan O'brien tbh

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next?I thought it was the guy I saw yesterday morning but now idk

112: Does someone like you currently?I don't think so

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone?Nah

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?Flings bc hoe

115: Ever made out with just a friend?Yep

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship?Single I guess, never had any relationships.