#I'm asking (1) thing

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...

#not a shitpost #serious post #ask to tag #tw trauma #cptsd #c-ptsd #and if so we should TALK about it #because it means there are a whole group of survivors out there whose mental health regularly worsens during holidays #like i know i am most certainly not the only person who feels an undefined Dread hanging over christmas/my birthday/july 4 etc #bc too many shitty things happened during those times and now my brain is hypervigilant bc traditionally these are the Danger Times #and this seems like it would be particularly common for survivors of abusive/dysfunctional households (aka most people with c-ptsd) #because holidays/vacations typically mean 1) the whole family is together/being forced to interact #2) and undergoing external stressors e.g. travel/relatives aka 'outsiders' visiting/routines & coping mechanisms being interrupted etc #3) there is social pressure for this to be a Fun Family Bonding Experience which only highlights the cracks in the foundation #and exposes the common Everything Is Fine/We Are A Happy Family lie #4) the cognitive dissonance of feeling tired/anxious/stressed/afraid during a time when you are 'supposed' to be Making Good Memories #and then everyone is angry/tired/anxious/triggered and things boil over and something or someone goes Very Wrong #weird that i'm posting this in october when halloween is...sort of the ONLY holiday i have only good and happy feelings towards #i got lucky there #also i have positive feelings towards Labor Day but that's for socialist reasons

[why-the-heck-not]

the saturday-sunday night diabolical "life is falling apart"- to do list followed by a mad scramble

#in the middle of said mad scramble bc ohmygod I have 30+ things on that to do list that I'd like to get done by Tuesday at the very VERY #latest so like eeee it's a uhh something something #my sunday's have been starting on saturday evenings lately time's getting more condensed !! yikes #no one ask me when I'm planning on sleeping if I'm here drinking coffee at 1:30am I don't know I'll cross that bridge when I get to it #studyblr #bookblr #booklr #aesthetic #books #study #reading #read #book #studyspo #april 2024 #2024

[andsewingishalfthebattle]

Novice sewing pattern: Cut out shapes. Line up the little triangles on the edges. Stitch edges together. We've also included step-by-step assembly instructions with illustrations.

Novice knitting pattern: yOU MUSt uNDerstANd thE SECret cOdE CO67 (73, 87, 93) BO44 (63, 76, 90) 28 (32, 34) slip first pw repeat 7x K to end *kl (pl) 42 * until 13" (13, 13, 15) join new at 30 pl for 17 rows ssk 27 k2tog mattress lengthwise BO and sacrifice a goat to the knitting gods. WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WANT "INSTRUCTIONS," I JUST GAVE THEM TO YOU

#knitting #no it's not a real pattern but I can't write one that makes sense because I have no freaking clue what any of that means #How do you make things that aren't basic rectangles #Why has every knitter I've asked for help just said 'patterns are easy; you just have to know how to read them' & then refused to teach me #Where do I even find a goat to sacrifice #How do I join the pattern cult #I am so confused #I've been knitting for almost a decade but I can only make scarves and potholders #I learned one (1) stitch by watching a YouTube video and none of my friends or family knit so I have no IRL resources #And nobody I meet seems to want to take the time to explain the rest to me #I taught myself to sew through trial and error but that doesn't really work with knitting because error is pretty much just... Unraveling? #Anyway sorry for the tag rant I'm just frustrated that I see pretty things I want to make but the instructions are in an alien language #And the gap between 'absolute novice' and 'intermediate' seems to be about 20 years of experience and formal instruction

[sandflakedraws]

How about Floyd, who came back as promised, hugging little Branch who just saw Grandma Rosiepuff get taken/eaten by the Bergen Chef?

Or how about Floyd, who came back as promised only to find the Troll Tree devoid of life and Rosiepuff's pod empty, going grey as he mourns baby Branch whom he thinks got eaten?

Hey so! Totally fun (and not hurtful at all) fact-!

For Trolls Band Together, the story the writers wanted to go with (according to the Artbook and novelization), implies that Brozone's disbandment happens before Bergen Town is even a thing, which has such severe implications to me.

so.

tfw you return to your home to find that

actually, the forest that sheltered you is eradicated, replaced with a giant town whose occupants' sole form of joy consists of devouring you.

the tree that served as your home is the only thing left of that forest, and it is decayed, withered, and desiccated... displayed in the middle of the town in a cage.

your pod, your home, is empty. every home around it is empty too. there are no trolls in sight.

as far as you know, everyone that used to be here is gone. or dead. most likely dead.

you will never see them ever again.

you were just a teenager.

#trolls #floyd #meadow-hearthfire #sandflakedrew #asks #u can pry this from my cold dead fingers #this is canon .. to Me specifically #because i'm a sucker for something that makes a thing Both Better And Also Sadder #in addition #the way i've been reconciling the general timeline is like so: #1. There was the Inciting Bergen-Ate-A-Troll Incident however many years ago - which fractured the pop trolls into smaller communities #2. The Bergens had indeed been eating pop trolls for generations complete with Trollstice #HOWEVER. #That had been amongst a moving Bergen settlement and those various pop troll populations #(<those groups have been eaten to extinction) #3. Therefore - Bergens were things our specific group of trolls were aware of at large - but one they had not yet experienced #4. It culminates with Bergen Town being the recent Settlement and the luck of Peppy's group running out.

[saphushia]

|| part 1 || part 2 || part 3 || part 4 coming soon... ||

man sabo really thought he'd get away from ace that easy, huh? well tough shit buddy you just got the attention of one of the most stubborn men on the seas. i do wonder how this'll play out now that sabo's cornered... hehe >;3

textless versions below the cut for those who want to look at. pictures <3

(skipped page 5 due to. y'know. it not having any dialogue)

#see this is why i don't give estimations on when updates will come #because literally 3 days ago someone asked when part 2 was coming and i said at least a week or so cause i only had 1 page done #and then i just got in the grove and cranked out 3 1/2 pages in 2 days dfkghsdjkf #consistant workflow? what's that lol #warlord!ace au #one piece #sabo one piece #sabo the revolutionary #portgas d ace #hmmm koala's here but i don't think enough to tag her #cause she's entirely offscreen #ah well #art #comic #warlord!ace au update #feels wierd to post textless because like. the bubbles are a very important part of the page balance #but i'm also the kind of nerd who likes to look at that sort of thing so i get it akjbdfkgj #i'm posting this so late but whatever. your welcome uhhhh australians? maybe? sdfkbgk #pleaaase let there be no more errors i've corrected like 4 since starting the post and i'm so worried i'll post it and find another

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

Hello may 31th anon! Look at that, another year behind us and a new one to come. Have a nice day! ₍՞◌′ᵕ‵ू◌₎♡

#may 31th anon #hello friends!! (｡’▽’｡)♡ how are you!! I missed you so much! #I'm sorry that once again i have not been posting but I did that thing again where I got scared of posting #I do not know why but it is the same with physical paper diarys #I have 3 diarys and they all have 1 entry #I think one just says 'I am ten' #what have you been up to!! did you do something fun? is it summer too where you live? c: #my tumblr messages seem to be broken! I'm sorry if you wrote something :C it just says 'no new messages' despite also saying new messages #not a lot has happened here! I got a tomato plant and then I got very invested into the tomato plant and I have eaten three tomatos so far ( #my roses are also doing well!! I just got a new yellow rose and since she got here she only made orange flowers #I do not know the meaning of that #but I am very thankful! ( ˊᵕˋ )♡ I love it when things are orange!! #I've been trying to buy an orange shirt for the past 2 weeks but they always sell out before I get to them #I'm also thinking about buying a jean jacket #I have not worn a jean jacket for at least 15 years because one time in 7th grade tthe girl behind me said #that I was wearing a cool jean jacket and I just assumed that this was bullying for no actual reason #but maybe she just thought that it was an acutal cool jean jacket #we'll soon have out 10 year school reunion #maybe I should ask her #is anyone else going to a secret Sherlock phase again #I just want to see that silly little hat again #would sherlock holmes wear a jean jacket #have a nice day everyone!! #see you soon hopefully!! #♡＾▽＾♡

[probablyhuntersmom]

"It's been a year, I feel so heavy... Mama, will this feeling ever stop?"

“Mijo. It hurts. But you have so many people who love you. We can help you carry that feeling and one day it might not feel as heavy.”

(Dialogue by @childlikegoblinqueen, with some smol additions by me)

#the owl house #toh hunter #hunter noceda #camila noceda #for Flapjack #toh edits #loz's edits #my notes: I may be having an unpopular opinion after Dana said Willow would cut his hair short again..but -- #I think he'd only make that step after he hits the 1-year mark. I've felt extremely similar numbness/depression that lasted almost a year #I'm not sure he'd have the focus to be proactive to change his hair so quickly. coz everything will be a reminder: he may not see the point #anyhow yea it's sweet to think of how respectful the others will be to him. asking him if he wants to take part during the first anniversar #the house wouldn't be decorated. he'd feel bad that they can't have as much fun as they apparently otherwise would #but obvs they insist they are very willingly dialing things down a lot and are also sad and grieving #but the key here is..aesthetically he's wearing a red sweater. that counts for something (thematically). for a reason

[snarkspawn]

everyone deserves a break once in a while

#kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series #kinnporsche fanart #kenbig #kinnporsche ken #kinnporsche big #perth nakhun #nodt nutthasid #thai bl #thai drama #bl series #stuff and things #userpharawee #in my head I picture this meme where someone asks ken if he's the big spoon or the little spoon #and he's like I'M A KNIFE!!!1! #sure jan #big kinnporsche #ken kinnporsche #bl tag

[share-the-damn-bed]

JONATHAN & MIKE || then and now

#jonathan byers #mike wheeler #stranger things #if this just doesn't make you cry #like look at them. THEY WERE BABIES #but uhg. that trust has always been there #my last jonathan and mike set for a while #unless anyone has specific requests (send an ask) #i'm finally free of whatever brain rot they had over me #my argument stands: 1 jonathan cares about mike. 2 they respect one another and work well together/have similar habits. #and 3 they have always had respect for one another and i think trust one another #especially mike #cw: flashing lights

[ancientbygone]

and everything that's here is rising in tone and saturation it's an aching, it's a violence, it's a longing to erase the separation

a companion piece to Cicadas, of sorts. closeups under the cut:

#sleep token #sleep token art #sleep token fanart #sleep token vessel #sleep token him #bygone art #bygone beloved #eyestrain #eyestrain tw #ask to tag #this one took more time than i'd like to admit. i'm usually pretty quick with my art because i tend to get consumed by the process #but this time i was consumed by other things as well. i suppose it's good that i decided to take it slow #crywolf's new song (tenebrescence) inspired me to finish this. lyrics from it are also in the caption #also to stress it further this piece is connected to Cicadas in a way #same colors (in places) & composition inspired by page 1 & the theme is similar #Cicadas is about how every vessel is expendable and how there's always someone before and after and there always will be #this is about the change of a specific one. he was someone before and he will be someone after #and he'll be himself again. a different himself than he started as but himself nonetheless #it will be okay but it will be different but it will be okay #the intense feelings (good and bad) coming from your being someone else will go away but you will be okay and you will be you #ah fuck my eyes hurt

[lavenoon]

bh!Eclipse "asked to reach the top shelf" meets "can't reach the lowest cupboards without folding like a paperclip" - @clxckwork-sun-n-moon

Yeah, I mean, there's a reason SI is laughing here after Eclipse "gets on his level" - man's too tall, he'd need to lie down to get close

But shenanigans are so very fun, so:

vs

It's called symbiosis <3

bloodstain fool by naffeclipse and og detective au by sunnys-aesthetic!

#answer let luce #clxckwork sun n moon #dcamv #sleuth jesters #bloodstain fool #my art #wait did i tag that other ask with my art tag. squints #the router idea i had before already so it had to jump in for the top shelf thing #bc YEAH MY ROUTER IS AT THREE METERS HEIGHT IM SCARED OF FALLING THE LADDER IS WOBBLY AND EVEN WITH LADDER I CAN BARELY REACH #IM SHORT YOUR HONOR #but yeah it already happens a lot lmao #i go grocery shopping with someone taller they get grumpy over not finding something but me; eye contact avoider N°1; looks down - #and BAM who wouldve thunk! lower shelves exist! #they *always* say smth like “No wonder I didn't find it/ you found it” #I'm not even mad bc yeah I do be looking down a lot. #eye contact avoidance. bad balance need to watch step. sky too bright. many reasons #okay these tag rambles are getting long lmao #enjoy <3 #menace4menace

[raayllum]

it's funny because in our two examples of "what does a high mage do" we see Viren be involved in basically every decision that Harrow makes as an advisor, even ones that wouldn't necessarily warrant it immediately, versus Callum, who *checks canon* isn't substantially involved in any decision Ezran makes as king in any given season

#high mage club #i JUST WANT TO KNOW #1) how over bearing viren was (bc i feel like he would be) #vs 2) how few fucks callum actually gives #like he attends council meetings like the rest of the council. suggests/contributes nothing #except (beloved) bad jokes #corvus asks ezran about his plans and discusess his reasons #sorvus are both involved in ezran's b-day party planning #crownguard do handle security (as soren makes extra plan in 4x01) #he steps up when things go wrong in 4x03. opeli gives counsel #hell we don't even know if the painting was made by callum either #LIKE #i'm willing to be kpp'ar was actually normal - did his job and worked on personal projects in his spare time #viren was overbearing and overly involved but like. harrow being a warmer king than his dad yeah yeah #meanwhile callum is only as peripheral to ezran as he is bc they're brothers #but he actually does even less as a high mage Court Politics Wise than either of the other two #bc hyperfixations

[lee-hakhyun]

i see people thinking that the side story is the bad ending for kim dokja. and don't get me wrong, he doesn't come back after the door opens, but that is because kimcom CHOSE that.

they had the option to open a door where kim dokja woke up, but they chose to go through the door where he doesn't wake up because they know that first door is a trap (like 49/51), and they want all of kim dokja. and when they go through, kim dokja is gone, but he's left a note. he is STILL OUT THERE (and part of him is with lhh right now. it's complicated)

anyway this is just to say KIM DOKJA IS BACK IN THE SIDE STORY. he is just not with kimcom *yet*. i need to make this clear because i keep seeing people saying things that sound like people think he's gone for real in the side story.

#orv #and even then. i don't think it's possible for kimcom to get '100%' of kim dokja #what even is 100% of kim dokja? what is 100% of a person? #you forget things. does that mean you're not 100% of yourself anymore? #do they need to kill the reincarnated fragments to pick up those story fragments left with him? do YOU need to die to bring back kdj? #look at my url for the reason why i am passionate about this subject. i like the side story and where it's going with this #feel free to send an ask about anything i will answer and clear any possible misinfo you got #especially from tiktok i hate that place #i'm not forcing you to read it but just. give it a chance if you are curious even a little #it's cheap. vapolunes on twitter has season 1. i have season 1 + over half of season 2 translated. i can send you a guide for purchasing #please please dont use the wattpad tl its actually worse than mtling it yourself #orv side story #orv spoilers #side story spoilers

[revenantghost]

Regarding your recent post about wolfwood's potential survival in stampede, and the tag about wolfwood possibly being from earth.

Excuse Me, WHAT..

I crave more information.

OH YEAH, it's from the same interview mentioned in the Wolfwood has a chance at living in Stampede post!

I think I've read a different translation of this before, too--but regardless, note that this was fairly early on in Trimax's run, 1999. I remember reading in later interviews that the whole Livio and vials and all that wasn't planned from the beginning (I do NOT have the source for that on hand--if anyone knows what I'm talking about, please link it, but until then take this info with a grain of salt), so I'd imagine this is just an idea that got scrapped along the way. Or maybe it didn't, who knows??? I read an adorable fic about Wolfwood being curious about earth because he came from it the other day--it would be really fun AU fodder, imo

#Trigun #Trimax Spoilers #Trigun Stampede #Trimax #Trigun Maximum #Tristamp #corgiblu #Ask #Linking all the things because 1. Sources 2. I'm a nosy bastard that always wants to see the post mentioned in other posts lmao

[comradekatara]

You've mentioned Zuko's "inability to kill" before, so could I ask you to elaborate on that?

sure. zuko is banished for, essentially, committing treason. he says to ozai that he was banished for "speaking out of turn," but simply speaking out of turn is not actually why ozai banished him. zuko said that people shoudn't have to die for the sake of further empowering the fire nation, and that goes against their nation's entire ethos. zuko lacks, as azula puts it, that "killer instinct that is just so fire nation."

while zuko does set fire to suki's village in his quest to capture aang, and you could argue that he may have committed other such acts offscreen, we never actually see him outright kill anyone. unlike zhao, who kills the moon, and azula, who kills aang in a manner that would have ended the entire avatar line had katara not revived him, zuko threatens and intimidates and harms, but when it comes down to it, he does not actually kill, because he simply cannot.

he threatens to kill zhao, and if he had killed zhao, no one in the audience would fault him for it. zuko does not even burn him upon winning their agni kai, going against custom; zhao calls him a coward for it. zhao tries to kill zuko on multiple occasions, including when he blows up zuko's entire ship. but, when the ocean spirit is dragging zhao under, zuko still extends his hand in a futile attempt to save zhao. contrast this scene with sokka arguing to leave zuko for dead in the same episode. he legitimately does not have a problem with letting zuko die, because, as he says, zuko would do the same thing to them (at least, sokka seems to think so).

sokka kills combustion man, toph kills yu and xin fu, and neither of them have any regrets. conversely, katara cannot kill yon rha, and aang cannot kill ozai. like sokka and toph, they are justified in killing these men, perhaps even more so (since yin and xin fu did not actually attempt to kill toph, "only" kidnap her), but they ultimately choose mercy. like zuko on kyoshi island, aang and katara's actions, such as blowing up the factory in jang hui, may have had indirect casualties (i don't count aang being merged with the ocean spirit because he was not truly in control), but they are never able to kill directly, because when faced with another human being, regardless of how much they may hate them, their pathos prevents them from delivering that killing blow.

zuko, as a foil to aang and katara and the deuteragonist of the narrative, is also someone whose instincts prevent him from being the cold-blooded killer his nation expects of him. it is why, unlike the rest of his family (including iroh), he is unable to produce lightning; he is too sensitive to become the perfect weapon his father wants him to be, which is why azula's reveal is so thrilling and terrifying to the audience, because she is what ozai wants in a protege, unlike zuko, who try as he might, fails at embodying the fire nation values of ruthlessness and power at any cost.

#some caveats before anyone misinterprets me: #1) zuko has still done awful things. i am not saying that he is 'inherently good' or that because he has 'good inside him' that makes it ok #just as i am not saying that azula is 'inherently evil' for having that killer instinct. morality is far more complicated than that #this isn't a 'zuko smol bean uwu' post. i'm just stating facts from the show #just because he never directly killed anyone and just because he was abused into believing he was doing the right thing #does not mean that he did not do bad things (burning suki's village being the most tangible harm we see him cause iirc) #he just cannot kill people directly which is crucial to understanding his character esp as he relates to aang and katara #2) i am not faulting sokka and toph for killing people! and anyone who thinks that i am saying that is a dumbass. ok bye #asks #zuzuthelord #analysis #zuko #not tagging everyone else

[homosociallyyours]

My birthday is coming up on Monday--

normally I'm pretty excited but this year I'm very down. I miss my family, who I haven't been able to visit since spring of 2019 due to covid and my health, and things are just hard.

I've shared my Amazon wish list the past couple of years, and getting little prezzies (even very practical things like food staples) is a definite mood booster.

That said:

If you wanna look at my wish list it's here! Feel free to send me something not through Amazon-- if we're friends just message me and I'll probably be happy to send my address. I'll take cards/mail that way too :)

I'm also hoping to be able to afford a takeaway meal on my birthday, so if you can send me a little money to do that I'll always be grateful.

My venmo is Megan-Beene and my PayPal is homosocial.

Also with the state of the world as it is, if you'd rather send $ to fund e-sims to gaza or help a Palestinian family, that would also make me happy. Here's a link to verified gofundmes.

Many of you have helped me out in the past and I always appreciate it so much. Sharing/reblogging this is appreciated, as are birthday messages on Monday (or before or after)

#my birthday #wishlist #there's a bunch of silly and practical things on there #and for the gaza stuff-- even a couple dollars adds up!! #it's especially strange/hard asking for this right now given the state of the world #but I'm not kidding when i say it's been hard lately #so many crashes and bad fatigue days #plus i was gonna have a smaller bday gathering with only 5 ppl max #and so far i have 1 yes with caveats and 1 no #and 3 people who didn't even like the message :/ #it's hitting my 'people have finally gotten tired of you' fears pretty hard