#SPECIFICALLY for the angst of A. her wondering if this is just how it goes. her mother died having her. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nereidprinc3ss · 2 months

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okay i know this is kind of a specific request but can you do something with professor Spence and uni reader where they get into a spat and argue bc she did something stupid and he gets mad and she’s like “noooo pls don’t be mad i hate when you’re mad at me I’m sorry🥺” bc she literally cannot function knowing she let him down (me with everybody) but he’s like super stubborn and goes all closed up and quiet so that he doesn’t like blow up on her until she finally says like “pls talk to me” and he’s all pissed and like “hell na bitch u crazy!🗣️‼️” but then later he’s like “it’s ok i love u but neva do that shit again ho” then they make up and it’s good again 🎀 ok i explained that so poorly (and comedically if i may) but i hope u get it and pls make it SO DRAMATIC bc I live for drama! like she steals test answers or something or does something that could like get her kicked out of school OR him lose his job 🤔 sigh … idk I’m leaving now. Also i LOOPOOOCE ORRKGOOVI love your fics. Luv em

hey girl (gender neutral) this made me laugh bc genuinely sometimes i write spencer so ooc that is what he sounds like. and i'm not sorry! anyway this is potentially a vyvanse fueled nightmare but i wrote it and i'm posting it MY BLOG MY RULES BITCHESSSS!!!! but genuinely read the content warning LMAO this one got a lil kick to it

warnings/tags: ANGST, HURT/COMFORT, fem!reader, spencer and r get into a for real argument like they're mean to each other, spencer is a lil toxic but its resolved, emotionally neglects reader just for a teeensy second but then he's really nice and sweet again, discussion of his past addic+ion, gets fluffy because i'm not EVIL, gets suggestive at the end bc i am secretly evil.......

a/n: i don't know whats happening. this confuses me just as much as it confuses you. its 3 am in the morning. im gonna post nice happy things soon. Gootbye

“I cannot believe you right now. I don’t even—I don’t even know what to say.”

“Spencer, you don’t have to say anything. It has nothing to do with you, and I’m not looking for your approval.”

He looks up from where he’d been rubbing his temples, like you’re a headache, eyebrows raised and lips parted in indignant disbelief.

“Oh! You’re not looking for my approval? Well thank god for that, because if you were one of my students I would recommend expulsion to the board.”

“Are you fucking kidding me? I just said I don’t care about your opinion on this, much less your hypothetical opinion from some alternate universe where you have any authority over my education whatsoever.”

“You distributed an answer key to half of your class! Objectively this is the kind of thing that gets people expelled. I don’t understand how someone so smart could do something so fucking stupid.”

The words bite more than you were prepared for—but what hurts even more is how much he seems to mean them. In arguments past you’d both said things you didn’t mean, and then would immediately melt into I’m so sorry’s and the fight would resolve itself. Spencer’s clenched jaw and inability to make eye contact with you do not lend themselves to tender apologies. They cannot be attributed to miscommunication.

You take a step closer to where he’s bracing himself against the countertop, arms crossed defensively in front of your chest.

“Spencer, I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was such a big deal. People cheat in college all the time.”

Still no reply. His head shakes so minutely you wonder if you’re imagining it. Panic wells in your chest.

“Please talk to me. I really hate when you ice me out. I’m sorry, okay? Just... please say something.”

Finally, his eyes slide to you. They lack the fiery anger of moments ago but there’s not much softness there either. His normally warm gaze now feels too abrasive, too cold and sharp on your bare skin. You're exposed, much too soft for that grating look, and it feels like he can see everything that’s wrong with you.

“Believe me when I tell you this. I am doing us both a favor by not speaking to you right now.”

And then he’s leaving the kitchen—nothing but a breeze against your cheek and the sound of a door slamming to prove he was ever there.

The apartment is silent. You stand in the middle of the kitchen, unsure of what to do next. Spencer very, very rarely gets angry at you to the point of neglect, and you know he’s doing his best with what was modelled for him as a child and his tendency to feel things so deeply it’s nearly disabling; but that doesn’t make it hurt much less. It doesn’t make you feel less abandoned or alone.

You’re sad, and you’re still pissed, and maybe you’re in just a bit of shock as you robotically move back to your nest of blankets on the couch and resume your schoolwork. What else is there to do? Unless Spencer is right—unless you really are about to get expelled after getting the answer key for an upcoming test from a friend, who then gave it to another friend, and so on. But is that really your fault?

It’s a struggle to stay focused as your mind keeps drifting back to Spencer in the other room, those cruel words and that cold steely look in his eye that isn’t supposed to ever be aimed at you. It’s not a secret that side of him exists, but it doesn’t belong in this apartment. It’s not something he needs to use against you. He’s supposed to be on your side. But instead, he’d said you should be expelled and essentially called you stupid. And now you’re doing homework for a class at a school you may not even be a student of come Monday.

---------------------------------------------------

The sound of the office door opening forty-five minutes later spikes your blood pressure and simultaneously makes your heart flutter, because no matter how mad at him you might be, Spencer is still Spencer.

He comes to stand behind the couch quietly, but you don’t acknowledge him. Maybe your typing gets a bit more aggressive, but aside from that you flat out reject his presence.

“Can we talk?”

You let him sweat for a minute as you finish your paragraph.

“I don’t know, Spencer. Can we? Or are you not done with your temper tantrum?”

“That is... well deserved,” he sighs, rounding the couch and tapping the bottom of your foot, signaling that he wants you to move your legs. You despise how automatically you comply, pulling your knees to your chest to avoid touching him as he sits next to you. There’s a long moment of silence, in which you resume typing. Spencer scoffs, leaning in slightly to peer at your screen. “Are you doing homework right now? I’m a complete asshole to you and you just... do your homework?"

“What the fuck else was I supposed to do?” you almost-yell, slamming your laptop shut and blinking away potential tears. “The only person I wanted to talk to called me stupid and fucking left!”

The tears realize their potential once you admit the blunt truth.

Spencer carefully moves your laptop and pulls you into his arms—and you just let him. There’s not much fight left in you. There wasn’t a lot to begin with.

“I am so sorry, angel. You’re right, I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have yelled, I shouldn’t have said what I said, I shouldn’t have walked away. I overreacted.”

“Yeah, you really did,” you cry, allowing him to run his hand over your hair. “Why did you do that? Why were you so fucking mean?”

His voice shakes slightly as he responds, betraying his own anxieties, and a new, unwelcome sense of trepidation slithers through your veins.

“I was wondering that, too. Even as I was saying it, I knew—I knew it wasn’t what I wanted to be saying. And then I was in the other room and I wanted to be out here, and I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t. But I think I was just scared. Which—I know, doesn’t really make sense, but... I think about when Ethan dropped out of the academy, and ended up doing heroin in New Orleans for three years, and I think about when I almost left the BAU because I was so convinced I’d never get clean that I didn’t even want to anymore, and—and the idea of you losing your education and your direction like that terrified me, probably unreasonably, and I took it out on you. And I’m sorry.”

“But I’m not like you or Ethan. You don’t have to worry about that. Even if I... even I do get in some sort of disciplinary trouble. That’s a road you don’t have to worry about me going down, ever.”

He fixes some unseen wrinkle on your shirt.

“Yeah, but, remember... I used to not be like me or Ethan either. Do you think twelve-year-old Spencer would have ever even considered that of the infinite realities and universes which exist, he was living in one where someday he’d be shooting up in the bathroom at work?”

“Mm-mm,” you hum, shaking your head and burying your face in Spencer’s shoulder. The sound is more of a plea for him to be less descriptive than an answer to his rhetorical question. It’s still much easier for him to talk about that part of his life than it is for you to have to actually imagine it. You didn’t know him then, but you’ve seen pictures, and you know Spencer now, and it’s... it’s just too much. Too sad.

“Okay,” he agrees soothingly, still playing with your hair. “I digress. My point is that literally anything is possible, and while it’s not necessarily likely, I more than anyone know that anxiety even over the most improbable of things is never completely unfounded.”

You sniffle in response, too emotionally and physically exhausted to contribute much to the conversation by this point. Thankfully, Spencer can talk for two. An idiosyncrasy which you love and comes in handy every once in a while. He can play his own devil’s advocate; in this case, you.

“But that doesn’t mean I get to take it out on you. Ever. I truly, truly, sincerely apologize for that. I never want to hurt you.”

You let the apology sink into your skin like a salve, soothing every abrasion those earlier words had left in their violent wake.

After a few minutes, you find the energy to ask a question that might best remain unanswered.

“Are you still mad at me?”

He’s quiet for a beat, seemingly contemplative as his fingers trace abstract patterns in a language all his own on your arm.

“I’m not thrilled. But you were right earlier. It’s not my place to be mad at you for something like that.”

“Mm... it’s a little bit your place. You’re an actual professor.”

He chuckles.

“At an entirely different university.”

“Thank god,” you laugh. “You and me at the same school would be such an HR clusterfuck.”

While it’s almost a serious matter, the smile in his voice is evident.

“Yeah... I, uh... try not to think about it.”

“Okay, but seriously. In your professional opinion. Am I fucked? Like, do I need to prepare an appeal and character witnesses or whatever?”

Spencer sighs.

“It was incredibly reckless and irresponsible. You should be ready for disciplinary pushback from the schoolboard if you get caught. That being said... because over sixty of you got a hold of the answer key, I doubt anyone is getting expelled, and even if they did, it would likely only be the TA and the student he gave the key to. It’s my tentative, professional opinion that you’ll probably be fine.”

You relax slightly, allowing a tension you didn’t realize was there to shed like an old skin.

“I’m not gonna cheat again,” you promise on an exhale. It’s simply too much risk for too little reward.

Spencer’s response is quiet, and comes much faster than you’d expected.

“Oh, I know you aren’t. Because if you do, you’re going to have to worry about disciplinary action from me. And I’m not nearly as nice as the dean of your school, darling girl.”

But something about the way he says it—a thinly veiled threat/promise contrasted by a sweet kiss to your forehead—doesn’t exactly make academic honesty look all that exciting.

#spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x self insert #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you

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angel-eyes05 · 11 months

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to leave the warmest bed i've ever known (part 4)

PREVIOUS CHAPTER

pairing: spider-woman!reader x miguel o’hara

summary: so much time has passed since you last saw each other. will old feelings come up again once you two find each other again?

warnings: HUGE ATSV SPOILERS DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THIS MOVIE, this is so against canon its insane, NSFW (we did it guys we're finally here), switch!reader and switch!miguel, blood mention, fang and claws play, p in v unprotected, cumplay, angsty (i couldnt help it), it goes, angst, smut, and then angsty fluff at the end youre welcome

word count: 3.2k

notes: for some reason, it didn't let me tag as many people who wanted to be on the taglist, so if i didn't end up tagging you for the final part, sorry idk what went wrong

also forgive me i was listening to boygenius while writing the parts leading up to the smut so it might get a little angsty there (i cant help it) (miguel and y/n are so bite the hand and cool about it core)

but then i balanced it out by listening to frank ocean (pyramids specifically) while writing the smut so you're welcome

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Three years had passed. Three years since you finally found Miles, defeated The Spot, and caused the collapse of the Spider Society. Everyone had gone back to their separate dimensions, but were able to still visit each other with their still working portal watches. Miles and Gwen specifically were very happy. Peter B. went back home to live with MJ and Mayday, sending you frequent pictures of Mayday to keep you updates. You were different. You didn’t return to your home world. You didn’t necessarily have anyone to return to per se. Instead, you decided to hop between dimensions, seeing what crime there was to fight in cities that didn’t have anyone to protect it. It was enough to keep you occupied, and as long as your watch still worked, you had the option to stop if you wanted to. Life was nice. You finally had found peace.

But something felt off. Something thudding in the back of your head. Because even though you had been at peace for three years, it had also been three years since you saw him. You had seen him during the final showdown between all of Spider Society, but your team had managed to keep you two apart, due to fear for your safety. After the fight was over, you two had made eye contact with each other a couple of times, but never approached each other. If you were being honest, you were still scared of him at that point, even seeing him tied up there on the floor waiting for someone to deal with him.

It took a while for your gashes to heal, the ones on your back taking much longer to turn into scars than the ones on your tricep and thigh. The marks on your body were frequent reminders of him and the damage he’s caused to your life. Part of you hated him for it. But most of you just missed him. Unlike Jess, who sent you pictures of her baby every now and then, neither of you had reached out to the other. It was crazy how five years of shared history can be thrown to the ground so quickly.

Right now, you were sitting on the railing of your apartment balcony. For the past month or so, you decided to park it in Earth-3819. There wasn’t much crime going on there, so it was a nice place to stop when you needed a break. Your feet dangled off the edge of the railing, as you looked out to see the sunset on the skyline. The wind blew faintly at your face, causing strands of hair to fall out of your high bun. You had been thinking more about him recently, wondering if he was feeling the same way you were.

Almost as if you manifested it, you heard the sliding glass door from your bedroom slide open. Startled, you quickly turned around, ready just in case it was an attacker.

It was much worse than an attacker.

You mouth laid agape as his massive shadow covered your smaller body. Feelings that laid dormant for the past three years suddenly erupting in your stomach. You looked up to the roof of your building as a signal to meet you up there, as you attached a web to the top and swung up there.

Once you were both at the top, you faced your back to him to take time to catch your breath. Your emotions were all over the place right now. “You’re really hard to find, you know,” he said trying to break the silence. You wanted to throw up. As much as you hoped this moment would come, you never realized how unprepared you would be if it ever did. You couldn’t bare to look at him right now, knowing you would lose control of yourself if you did. “You look…good.” How would he know, he only saw your face for a second before you bolted off. You both stood there, the wind growing louder and louder with each second you both stayed silent.

All of your senses came to a freeze once you felt his hand place itself on your shoulder, causing a flinch from you. “I wanted to find you again, mi vida,” he said in that rich, deep, smooth tone of his that drives you crazy. You could tell he was getting closer when you felt the hairs on your neck stand up from him breathing on them. “I missed you, and I was hoping we could pick up where we left off,” he said into the crook of your neck and began to plant kisses there. You broke free from his grasp by the third kiss he left. “No no no no no, no we can’t. It’s not that simple Miguel,” you said, pinching your bridge and sighing. There's no way he could've thought it would be this easy. He's not this stupid….is he?

“Listen amor, I’m sorry for everything that happened. But the past is the past.” He walked closer to you. “And I want my future with you.” He was up against you again. This time instead of your shoulder, he dragged his finger up and down your back in an almost hypnotic motion. God, you wanted him so bad, you wanted it to be this simple. That he can just apologize and everything could be okay. But you were reminded it couldn't be that way once his finger hit a pressure point in your scar. You swatted your hands in the air and walked away from him again. “No Miguel, that's not how this works. You can just do the things you've done to me and just say sorry and expect it to fix everything. You're not a child.”

Once you turned around to face him, you saw him standing there like a lost puppy. You just wish he could see what you were talking about. “Don't act like you didn't do horrible things then too. I saw what you did to Jess.” “Don't turn this onto me Miguel. This is about you.” You walked up to him and pressed your finger into his chest. “This is about you, and the horrible things you've done to me! I can't even take a shower anymore without looking at myself in the mirror and seeing your damage!” You lifted up your shirt sleeve. “You did this! This was all you!” Miguel looks down at you with sympathetic eyes as your eyes began to well up.

“And you can’t just barge in on this life I’ve made for myself and ask for me back because I won't go with you!” You were fully crying at this point, desperately trying to get your words out between sobs and lightly punching at Miguel's chest while he just stared at you. “Because I hate you Miguel! I hate you, okay!” You couldn't manage to talk anymore, overcome with the emotions he caused you to feel. You rested your head on his chest as you continued to sob. He wrapped his arms around you, causing you to do the same to him immediately. You sat there crying into his arms for about a minute, until he lifted up your chin with his finger.

“I’m so sorry I did this to you mi princesa. I’m so sorry. But I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.” Overtaken by emotion, you grab his face and crash your lips into his. Almost instinctively, his hands find a home onto your hips. You pull away for a second. “Just stop talking already,” you say breathlessly. He rushes to connect the two of your lips again, already going as far as to slip his tongue in between your lips. He’s so passionate about everything he does. His hands hold a tight grip on your body as his tongue explores your mouth. Almost like he’s hungry for you. No, not hungry. Starving. Famished. Three years apart was too much for him to stand without you by his side or in his bed. He needed you desperately. Like his life depended on if he was going to be able to fuck you into your bed tonight or not.

He let out moans as your hands ran through and tugged on his hair. But as soon as his claws came out and dug into your hips, you pulled your mouth off of his, a string of saliva still connecting you two. “No claws Miguel. Bring them out again, and its over okay.” You still weren’t mentally over his attack against you. He nods. “Of course, baby.” With that said, you let go of him to walk over to the edge of the building. Once your at the edge, you signal him over. He follows, almost as if he’s under some spell. You attach one of your webs to your balcony railing below and use it as a guide to fall down to it. You land on your balcony, Miguel following close behind as you open the sliding door to your bedroom.

After you close the door and blinds, you turn to find Miguel almost hovering over you. He looked like some kind of lost dog the way he kept following you around, begging for more of you. You gently kiss him and guide him over to your bed. He sits down on the edge of the bed and begins to pull your hoodie off your head as you help him take off his suit. Once your sweatpants are off as well, you gently push him onto his back on your bed. Goosebumps form all over your body, partially from exposure to the cold air in your room, and partially from seeing him like this underneath you again. Finally, you take his already hard cock, and slide it into your hole, causing a rough groan out of him as you begin to rock on his hips.

You take things nice and slow while you’re in control, knowing the moment you get sloppy he’ll start to take over for you. You kissed down his neck and collarbone as you rode him, with him gripping hard at your back and your hips. “Nng, m-missed you s-so much amor,” he groaned out. “Tan hermosa.” You begin to speed your thrusting, tugging at his hair to get strained noises out of him. His hands make their way up to your back, digging into your skin. But your quick to rip his hands out of your back and pin them above his head once his talons come out again, into your back this time. You also take your lips off of his and stop your thrusting.

Miguel searched your face for some kind of explanation to the sudden stop, to find you panting and nearly frozen still. You’re taken back to that fight, a result from his claws finding a way into your scars. You’re pulled back to reality by Miguel’s voice. “Amor, que paso?” he asks with concern. You quickly wipe the sweat off your face and look into his beautiful crimson eyes. You wanted to forget the pain he caused you all those years ago, but unfortunately you couldn’t. But, you were willing to forgive him though. “Nothing Miggy,” you say gently, pressing a soft kiss onto his lips. He tries to move his hands back onto you, but finds his hands still trapped to the headboard. He looks at you confused. “What did I say about the claws, Miguel.”

“Ay, baby you know its hard for me to control them around you,” he says, slightly annoyed, driven by the need to touch you again. “Well you’re going to need to try to okay? For now though, you’re going to stay like this.” His face drops, and he makes a sound almost like a whine. “Ay coño, lo siento péro you don’t need to punish me.” You felt powerful hearing him whine and beg like this. You were denying a starving man of his woman, his source of energy.

Arms squirmed in your hand, as you began to rock on top of him again. You made sure to not kiss him either, moving away whenever he would try to place his mouth onto yours. He whined as you picked up your speed, desperate to feel you again. “P-please, let me go cariño.” You moved your mouth down and whispered in his ear, running your finger up and down his stomach, causing him to melt under you and whimper like a madman. “Not just yet,” you whispered seductively, sending extra chills down his spine and into his stomach when you bit into his ear lobe.

Overcome with your own urge to feel him, you accidentally let go of his hands and moved yours to grab hold of each of his pecs as you planted kisses over his sternum. Suddenly, you’re overswept as Miguel is freed and takes control over the situation. “I love you amor, but you have to let me touch your,” he says in that beautiful, rich tone of his before he goes at his own pace: slamming himself into you.

He goes much faster than you did, and you almost come there on the spot as he nearly breaks your bed with his ferocity. You grip onto his enormous triceps for leverage as you let out a series of incoherent moans. “You like that, huh?” he pants out. You shove your lips onto his to get him to stop talking. “I-if you’re gonna do this, n-ngh, you’re gonna have to s-hh-ut up,” you manage to get out in between your almost inhumane sounds. He nods and shoves his tongue into your mouth, exploring the insides of your cheeks while his tip slams into your walls, causing that white heat to begin to build up in your stomach.

His hands swarm across your body, making up for lost time before, and eventually land on your breasts as he begins to palm at them. Just as you thought he couldn’t arouse you any more than he already has, he moves his mouth along your jawline, down to your neck, and begins to mark it with kisses and slight sucking. “I-I missed you too, Miggy.”

That nickname you had for him drove him crazy. So crazy in fact, his next move was to drive his fangs into your neck, making sure to not let his poison seep into your neck. He presses his lips and sucks on the skin on your neck while sinking his fangs deeper into you. You could feel yourself getting closer to the edge, as you held onto his broad shoulders while he basically slammed you into the bed. “Oh Miguel,” you moaned out. He nodded, not able to speak, due to his fangs still being attached to your neck. You could tell he was getting close too with how sloppy his pace was getting.

You’re washed over with bliss when the heat in your stomach finally takes over the rest of your body, almost clawing at Miguel while you come. His hands put more pressure on your breasts as he comes as well, moaning into the softness of your neck. Once you two have both finished, he slowly pulls his teeth out of your neck, and licks up the metallic liquid with his warm, delicate tongue. He slowly pulls his cock out of the sweetness of your cunt and rolls over to lay next to you on the bed, dragging his fingers across your pussy, taking the cum his fingers picked up and putting it in his mouth.

He plants a kiss onto your forehead before saying, “One second, princesa, I’ll be right back,” as he got up to go to the bathroom. He must have been in there for about 10 minutes before coming back into your room and reaching out his hand for yours. You take his hand as he leads you out of bed, reminded of how naked you are when you reveal yourself from the sheets.

He leads you into the bathroom to see that hes drawn a bath for the two of you. You blush slightly at the gesture, as he gets in first and leads you in. The touch of the water numbs your body slightly with the mixture of the cold room to the hot bath water. You almost melt as you sink in, laying your back against Miguel’s chest as he wraps his arms around your body. You could fall asleep right here, mixed between the comfort of the bath water, and Miguel’s body finally against yours again. The bathtub was kind of small, so his body was taking up most of the space, causing him to basically engulf you.

You were surrounded in him, his lips almost attached to the nape of your nack, his arms consuming your upper half, and his legs intwining with your lower half. He wiggles slightly to reach the soap, puts it in the water to wet it, and lathers it onto your body. First, he washes your arms, rubbing the soap back and forth over your arm hairs, and even under your armpits. Next, he moves to wash your chest. He takes the soap and moves it over your breasts and your underboob, causing you to move in closer to him. His response is to peck kisses into the crook of your neck, getting little giggles out of you. You stop giggling though after he stops kissing you and stays still for a second.

You wait in silence for him to do something. “...Miggy…you okay?” you ask when he doesn’t say anything. You turn your head slightly to see him. Out of your peripherals, you see him staring solemnly at your back. He’s finally seen them. The four almost perfectly placed scars warping across your back. They were huge. And he knows they’re from him. You turned your head back to the front and dug it in between your knees, pushing out your back even more. Miguel delicately traced his fingers over them, as you waited curled up for him to say something. “I’m sorry,” is all he can manage to weakly push out.

You decide to turn your body around to face him, splashing water around in the cramped bathtub while doing so. His eyes are down with sadness creeping over his face. You cup his cheek with your hand and press a loving, gentle kiss onto his lips. You bring his arms over your shoulders and wrap your legs around his hips. You wanted to be engulfed by him. You were so pressed on staying mad at him for so many years that you forgot how much you loved being this close to him. You could hear his heart softly beating as you pressed your head against his chest. He soon wrapped his arms around your body, taking you into him, and dug his head into the crook of your neck, almost as if he was hiding.

You stayed there for a moment before eventually turning back around. You laid your head in a position so you could still see his face if you looked up. You could feel yourself slowly dozing off in his arms. Your last thoughts before you slipped out of consciousness was of how perfect this was.

You had found your home again. Moreso, he found his way to you. And this time, you were never going to let go.

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a/n: i just wanted to say thank you to everyone for sticking around during this series. i know it wasn't meant to be 4 parts and only 2 so i really appreciate everyone who stuck around for the whole thing. make sure to look out for my next thing cause i wanna start writing an enemies to lover oc x miguel thing so please go and support that once thats out. thanks guys!!!!

taglist: @jenniferdixon05207 @sweetanimebakery @azxulaa @daimiyu @vinkar345 @pinkninja200 @luvstich @rin-matsuoka345-blog @lillunna @konniebon @hwanunjin @simp-nerd-16 @chucklefuvk @elwyn7 @haileybxxr @ilovemymomscooking @lansy-4 @maxi-ride @d4rno @callsign-blue @obamnas-soda @sophipet @violentlyneon @d1lf-loverrr @afro-hispwriter @kirke-is-my-name @ilovemiguelohara @lavnderluv @konniebon @msecho19 @kiamewrites

#fanfic #fanfiction #fem!reader #miguel o’hara #miguel o'hara x reader #spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderman 2099 #into the spider verse #across the spiderverse #spiderverse

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leahwllmsn · 5 months

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someday when you leave me, I bet these memories follow you around | leah williamson x reader

Five years after you leave Arsenal, you see Leah in the streets of London. You think that seeing your ex’s smile after all this time shouldn’t hurt this much.

; angst

Nothing lasts forever, but this is gonna take me down

y/n

The first time you kissed Leah was when you were fifteen and Leah was sixteen in your shared hotel room during an away game for Arsenal academy.

It was sloppy and awkward but it was perfect.

At that moment, with your laughter echoing throughout the small room and your eyes reflecting a newfound happiness, you figured you were destined to fall.

At fifteen, you knew you were too young to know what love was. But every time Leah laughed, you also knew that you were one step closer to figuring it all out.

Despite everything, you kept it all to yourself. Even after your first kiss, you never brought it up—and Leah didn’t either. You were glad. You didn’t think you were ready to have that conversation.

Still, you and Leah kept the secret glances, the longing stares, and the kisses shared when it was just the two of you in your bedroom (you had a bunk bed so the two of you mostly spent time at yours, on the top bunk, just in case someone was able to enter despite the locked door).

You were never going to become an actual couple. You knew this. While dating a teammate wasn’t prohibited, it was surely complicated. Let alone dating someone of the same gender—you didn’t know how your parents would react to that. But you figured that the fleeting moment of happiness whenever Leah kissed you wouldn’t hurt if nobody was to ever find out.

When you lost Leah in the end, you didn’t let yourself cry because you knew it was coming; your relationship was doomed from the start.

It was an unspoken ending that you had foreseen the moment Leah kissed you back that first time.

(No matter how hard you tried to change the ending, you couldn’t).

Leah

Leah met you when she was twelve and you were eleven. You were there to protect her from the hurtful words of boys at the park and you were there to comfort her when thunderstorms came and she was desperately trying to hide her shivers.

Since the first day you two met, Leah knew that you would be someone important to her—she didn’t know how, but Leah had a feeling that you were going to be someone to her. And that became true with the way you were always there at every important moment of Leah’s life.

After Leah’s first terrible game, when one of the coaches were too harsh on her and she ran to the changing room crying, you were there to hold her. The first time Leah missed practice because she fell sick, you were there to distract her with cookies and silly jokes and goofy faces.

And the day Leah Williamson did the unthinkable and told everyone that she was leaving Arsenal, you were there to hold her hand the entire ride back to her apartment from the training ground.

The only time you weren't there was when Leah left for Barcelona, and it was because Leah specifically asked you not to come.

You texted her that day, but Leah didn’t reply. And for five years that text was the last thing Leah had from you. Leah figured it was for the best.

y/n: safe flight leah

y/n: i love you

y/n: i always will

y/n

You moved to Los Angeles a month after Leah left. Leah was off to a fresh start, you wanted—no, you needed to do the same.

Everyone wondered what happened between the two of you that made Leah leave her most beloved club, and with the most shocking revelation that you weren't coming with her.

You only shrugged every time, forcing a wave of dismissal, “people drift apart. It happens all the time. Life goes on.” And it was true, you and Leah weren’t meant to last forever. You didn’t know how Beth got the idea that your love was written for the stars and that it was going to last a lifetime.

You knew from the start that you were a ticking time tomb, you were even surprised that it lasted that long.

Leah

“You never really tell us what happened between you and y/n.”

Leah looks at her teammates, an amused expression on her face. “It’s been years and you’re just asking me this now?”

Lucy shrugs indifferently. “You two clearly didn’t want to talk about it, so Kiera and I agreed to not touch the subject. But like you said, it’s been years, and you’ve probably moved on, so it should be fine in asking right…?”

“But,” Kiera interjects, her face full of worry. “If you don’t want to talk about it then it’s fine. As long as you’re fine then it’s great.”

Leah averts her gaze away. She doesn’t think she would ever be fine without you, but she’s able to get by her day without the pain in her chest, so it’s something.

“I was willing to let everyone know that she was the love of my life, yet she was more than fine with keeping me a secret,” Leah answers simply and that’s the last time Lucy and Kiera ever bring the topic up.

y/n

“Are roses really your favorite flower or are you just saying that because it’s the most basic flower ever?”

Leah laughed at her question. “What?”

“I’m just curious.” you wrapped an arm around Leah’s waist and cuddled further into her.

“What is your favorite flower?” Leah asked back.

“Daisies.”

“Then it’s my favorite too.”

You giggled and placed a kiss on Leah’s shoulder. “You’re silly. What if I told you my favorite flowers are actually sunflowers?”

“Then sunflowers are my favorite too.”

“Leaaah.”

Leah giggled along and turned to her side. You were face to face, so close that you could count the barely noticeable sunspots on her face.

“You remind me of sunflowers,” you admitted in a whisper.

“How so?” Leah whispered back.

“You’re so full of happiness and… and sunshine. Sunflowers are the embodiment of summer and that’s exactly what you are to me—the summer warmth from the blaring sun that burned me up yet I do not mind it one bit ‘cause I feel happy and content.”

Leah stared at her, you couldn’t piece what she was thinking. “Didn’t know you were this cheesy,” was what Leah finally said.

You simply grinned at Leah and pecked her lips. “Did you know,” you continued. “That there’s an ancient Greek myth about why sunflowers follow the sun?”

Leah hummed and closed her eyes, her hands were gently stroking your waist, letting you know that she was listening.

“Clytie—she was a nymph—adored Apollo, the God of Sun. And when he fell in love with another nymph, Clytie became jealous and told the other nymph’s father about the relationship, who then punished his daughter by burying her alive. Apollo became angry, obviously. He turned Clytie into a flower, but even then she still loved him and would spend her days watching him as he moved the sun across the sky, just like sunflowers move to face the sun.”

“That’s… something,” Leah whispered out, opening her eyes. “It’s kinda sad.”

“Right?”

“So the reason sunflowers are your favorite is because of its tragic story?”

“It’s not tragic!” you exclaimed, a pout on your lips. “It’s sweet!”

“Sure, love,” Leah kissed your pout away. You couldn’t help the grin that quickly spread across your face. “You hate the color yellow though,” Leah noted. “There’s no way sunflowers are your favorite.”

You shrugged. “Yellow isn’t that bad. You remind me of the color yellow. Especially since your hair is blonde,” you tucked a strand of blonde hair behind Leah’s ear.

Leah laughed and you scooted closer, your forehead against Leah’s neck. “Every time I see sunflowers, they’re gonna remind me of you.”

“Why?”

“Because even if you fall in love with someone else and curse me into a flower, I’d still be very much in love with you.”

y/n

“Are you sure you want to do this?”

Nodding, you give Tobin a rueful smile. “No… Yes. Maybe. I don’t know.”

Tobin gives you a sympathetic look and hands you your phone. “Call her.”

“Do you think she’ll answer?” your tone is full of doubt, you’re scared too, most of all.

“You’ll never know.”

You laugh. It’s funny how you got to this point. Five years later, sitting in your kitchen in your Los Angeles home with your best friend who happens to be your ex’s best friend too. Tobin is sitting in front of you, holding your hand ever so carefully, as if you’re about to break at any moment.

Going back to Tobin’s first question, no. You're not sure you should be doing this at all. But you have to do something. Your epiphany—or your “thank the fucking lord that y/n has finally come to her senses and realize that none of this shit matters anymore” as Tobin would call it, came crashing in one Sunday afternoon.

You weren't expecting it. How were you supposed to know that your life would be turned upside down in the middle of doing the dishes at your teammate’s kid’s birthday party? You would’ve laughed at it all if you didn’t feel a blow to your stomach so hard, knocking all the wind out of you. Through the window you could see your friend, Sydney, face full of smiles and laughter with her husband and her son next to her. They were all happy and the first thing that came to your mind was that you wanted that. And there was only one person you wanted that with.

You felt tears trickle down your face and that was when you started to question the point of it all—all the prestigious football awards and titles, all the fame and fortune. You were well-known, you had houses, apartments, villas all over the world, but what was the fucking point of it all if you didn’t have the love of your life by your side?

You realized that living without Leah wasn’t really living and that was the story of how you broke down in a party full of three year olds.

It wasn’t your greatest day, but it did lead up to this moment.

Taking a deep breath, you take your phone from Tobin’s hand and scroll through your contacts.

my love

With a quiet laugh at how pathetic you are for keeping the contact name, you place the phone to your ear. It keeps on ringing and you’re certain that Leah isn’t going to answer, but the beeping stops and you hear the voice that you haven't heard in years.

“Hello?”

“Hi,” your voice is faint, barely a whisper. “Uh- it’s y/n.”

“I know,” there is a barely audible sigh on the other end. Whether it’s out of annoyance or apprehension, you don't know. A part of you hope it’s a sigh of relief—something that you feel as soon as you hear Leah’s voice. It feels a lot like coming home after years astray. “I still have your number.”

“Right.” you find yourself tongue-tied. You had it all planned out, what you’re going to say and what you’re going to ask, but something stirs up within you at the sound of Leah’s voice.

“Is there a reason you called?”

“Yes. Uhm,” you close her eyes and try to calm yourself down. “I wanted to ask you… if- if it’s okay to…” you look at Tobin helplessly and you find the brunette staring back at you, an encouraging look on her face. Taking a deep breath, “If it’s okay to tell everyone about us.”

There’s a clang on the other end, making you wince. “Are you okay? Leah?”

Leah is still silent, you don't mind waiting. After a minute, Leah finally speaks, “Me? Are you okay? Where did all this come from?”

“Oh,” you feel your cheeks flush. “I did some thinking. I want to tell everyone about you. I’m not expecting anything, don’t worry. I know it’s over between us… But I just- I’m gonna tell everyone about me and you were a big part of me so- I don’t know. I want- Nevermind. This is stupid. Just forget it—”

“Wait, y/n.”

“…Yeah?”

“You’re gonna come out?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.”

You feel your chest constrict at the sound of Leah’s voice—how dejected she sounds. “Leah… I’m sorry.”

“Why are you sorry? That’s great, y/n,” Leah says. You can now clearly hear the hurt in her voice. “I’m proud of you.” But there’s a hint of pride too and you feel a lump forming in your throat.

How can Leah be proud of you for doing something you should’ve done years ago? Five years ago, to stop Leah from leaving. To stop Leah from thinking that you wouldn’t do anything for her.

“I really am, y/n.” Leah continues. “Don’t beat yourself up that it took you this long. Everyone has their own pace.”

“I know,” you sniffle. “I just wish that I could’ve figured it out sooner- and- and maybe that way I wouldn’t have- have lost you-”

“Hey, hey, y/n,” Leah’s voice is soothing and you find yourself calming down. You’re amazed that Leah’s voice still has the same effect on you. “Don’t think about the ‘what-if’s. You’ll go crazy. Believe me, I know.”

You don't say anything, trying to keep your tears at bay.

“I spent the year after we broke up thinking where we would’ve been if I didn’t walk out that door. If I stayed with you. Maybe you would be sleeping next to me in our home in London. Or Barcelona. Or even Los Angeles, because as much as I didn’t see myself living there, I knew I would’ve sucked it all up ‘cause you love that city so much.”

“Leah…”

“Maybe we would’ve been engaged. Or married. Two kids, just like how we dreamed of, do you remember? We would’ve retired from all of this and you’d have your own football academy and I’d be there to support you through it all. I’d probably be a coach there, teaching all the kids who have the passion to be just like us.”

You laugh, wiping her tears away. “An academy?”

Leah laughs along with you. “You don’t think I know? You stay back after dinner with Dad and Jacob, having discussions with them about what it would take to build your own academy.”

“I was just curious. I’m a high school drop-out, Leah. I’m not smart enough to build my own academy, but I appreciate your belief in me.”

“You’re the smartest person I know.”

It’s silent for a moment and you can hear Leah’s soft breathing. You miss this more than you realize.

“Thank you,” you whisper.

“What for?”

“For not hating me, I guess.”

Leah’s laugh is loud and you smile. “I could never hate you. Even when I was deep in my daydreams of the ‘what-if’s and the disbelief of you being gone, I didn’t hate you.”

You sigh. You don't know why this feels a lot like closure. You don't want that. A closure means closing any window of opportunity for the two of you.

“Sometimes… Sometimes two people love each other too much that fate becomes jealous and tears them apart.”

But the more Leah talks, the more you feel the inevitable closure coming.

“You’re my greatest love, y/n l/n. Don’t ever forget it, okay?”

You don’t know if what you feel is relief or misery.

Leah

“I want you, you! I want all of you!”

“You have me!” you replied exasperatedly. “You’ve always had me! What are you talking about?!”

“But you’re a secret! I want you all the time. Not just when no one is around!”

You rubbed a hand over your face. “We’ve talked about this, Leah.”

“But—“

“This,” you gestured widely, your voice cracking with pain. “This is all temporary. We’ve always known from the start. I’ve deluded myself into thinking that we somehow could make it work when all it did was prolong the eventual pain we would endure when we have to break things off.”

Huffing with laughter, Leah’s face was laced with pain. “Glad to know you’re so fucking optimistic about us, y/n.”

“Leah,” your voice was pleading. “I don’t see the point in this if we’re just going to—”

“The point? I love you! Isn’t that fucking enough?! y/n—”

“Leah,” you cut her off. “Leah, I love you too. You know that. But sometimes love isn’t enough.”

“Of course it’s enough!” Tears were streaming down Leah’s face and you had to look away. You couldn’t handle seeing her so helpless and in pain.

“It’s not,” you whispered.

Balling her hands into fists, Leah kept her eyes on you despite you not meeting her eyes. “If you’re so afraid about what people think, we can get out of here for a little while, y/n,” Leah pleaded. She was desperate. “Take a vacation, as long as we like. We could go to Italy, or Spain, heck even somewhere in America. We can be anywhere but here and it’ll be alright.” Leah stood in front of you, her hands coming up to cradle your face. “Please, y/n. We can make it. I know we can. I have faith in us.”

You finally looked at Leah, complete devastation on her face. “Then what, Leah? We tell everyone about us, we leave for a little while, eventually we have to come back to the real world. We can’t escape forever. Once we’re back, we see that our relationship is all that they’ve been talking about. They won’t focus on your football skills, they’ll focus on your love life even when it’s none of their business. I can’t take that away from you.”

Spluttering, Leah looked taken aback. “I- what? I don’t care about all that. We’ll live. It won’t be the end of the world.”

“You’re gonna resent me someday.”

“Why would I resent you? I won’t—”

“You love football!” you interrupted. “It’s your whole world and I’m not going to be the one you let it all go for.”

Leah couldn’t keep the edge out of her voice when she replied. “You’re my world, y/n. And why are you talking as if I have to have one or the other? I can have both! You exist in this world too, y/n.”

“The media will eat us alive.”

“They probably will, but we’ll get through it,” Leah looked determined. Your heart broke all over again. “Together.”

“I’m sorry, Leah.”

“Why does it feel like you’re giving up?!” Leah shouted in despair. “We’ve barely even started. This is our future you’re throwing away! Why are you so afraid?”

“Because I know how it’ll end!”

“No, you don’t! You’re not a psychic, for goodness sake!”

“I do! I swear to god, Leah, I do.”

You had tears in your eyes, Leah could see the fear in them too. But despite the sadness written all over your face, your stance was final. Leah could see it with the way your jaw was clenched, your arms crossed over your chest, a look on your face that appeared whenever you were in an argument. The worst part of it all was that Leah knew that this was your demeanor when you knew you weren't going to lose the argument.

Whatever you were thinking of, it was final. There was no changing your mind.

So Leah took a deep breath and willed herself to walk away. There was no use in fighting for you when she knew you didn’t want her to.

Leah

Leah wakes up with dread filling her chest. She has always been a morning person, but today is different. She knows you'll upload your video today, sometime around 2pm, you had said in your text last night.

So despite it being only 7 a.m., Leah can’t help the anxiousness that’s cursing through her body with the thought that everyone is going to know.

Leah came out a year ago. She didn’t exactly do a grand gesture like what you're about to do; she simply had a picture of her kissing a girl leaked and that was it. She uploaded a selfie on her Instagram page with the caption: yes I do like girls and that was it. Sure, people bothered her, her mentions were a mess, the media vilified her saying that the captain of the Lionesses can’t be gay, but she stopped caring.

The moment she lost the one person who she thought was her soulmate, Leah had a hard time caring about anything anymore.

She still played football, because that was what she loved. But she never cared about how many awards she received or the ranking of her team in the league.

Awards and achievements—they all paled in comparison to having you. You dancing around her kitchen in an oversized t-shirt, you singing in the shower with the door always open because you hated having the door closed for some reason, you cooking her waffles and pancakes for breakfast because you knew Leah preferred both at once, you who were still the most beautiful girl in the world to Leah even after hours and hours of football practice.

Leah sometimes wished she could trade her million-dollar deal with simply having you around.

Pushing these thoughts away, Leah goes about her day. She calls Kiera, then Alex, then Beth—she talks to everyone in hopes of distracting herself of what’s to come.

But it doesn’t work and Leah finds herself staring at her laptop an hour before the clock turns 2. She doesn’t know what to expect. What are you going to say?

When the clock turns 2, Leah refreshes her YouTube page and there it was:

The Truth

y/n l/n • 0 views • 25 seconds ago

Leah takes a deep breath and presses play.

y/n

“Hi everyone. If you’re watching this video that means I am finally brave enough to hit that upload button, and it’s funny because all my life I didn’t think I would let this part of myself be known to the rest of the world.

But here I am. So freaking nervous, but here I am…”

You laugh nervously at the camera. How does one do this? You think of Leah and how she seemed so unbothered in telling everyone that she likes girls. Why was it so hard for you to do the same? Then again, Leah has always been the most confident one out of the two of you. The one who has the mentality that everything will somehow be alright—the optimist. you on the other hand walk with cautious steps, afraid that one wrong move could cause your ground to crumble.

“The question that everyone used to ask me all the time is: are you happy? Are you close to happiness? I didn’t get why. Did it show? How unhappy I was? Maybe…

I wasn’t entirely unhappy. Of course being in Arsenal and living my dream as a footballer makes me happy. The people I’ve met, my friends and family, they all make me happy. But it somehow wasn’t enough, you know? Which is funny because with all the success I have, how can I be unhappy? People would say I was ungrateful and maybe it’s true. Human beings are never satisfied.

Honestly, it’s hard to feel truly happy when all you can feel every waking moment is paranoia and dread. The thought at the back of my head that kept on screaming: someone is going to catch me and that everything I’ve worked my whole life for will fall apart, just like that.

Back then I didn’t realize that playing football wasn’t everything, I didn’t realize that the key for me to be truly happy was in something–or someone–I took for granted. It was funny how I was scrambling to get it all back once I'd lost it.

I thought I was doing what I thought was best when I broke the heart of the person I loved the most in this world. I thought I was setting them free because the burden of an ‘us’ was a lot. I didn’t realize until it was too late that we were never a burden; the world expected too much from us when we owe them nothing.

So with this video, I want to tell everyone that I’m done listening to other people and for once… for once I want to do what makes me happy.

This person isn’t coming back, but telling everyone what I should’ve done back then… I think that it’s a start for me to understand how to be truly happy–and that is to start living for me and no one else.

I don’t want to lie anymore, I don’t want to keep this part of me a secret because it’s who I am. The… the person I’ve been in love with all my life is a woman and her name is Leah Williamson.”

Leah

Leah goes through her day in a daze. She ends up watching half of your video, she doesn’t know why she doesn’t have it in her to finish it. She feels like another second of your teary eyes with face full of anxiousness will cause her to do something stupid like call you up and ask if you’re alright.

Leah forgets how much she craves your voice.

Leah ends up calling Alexia. When her teammate picks up on the first ring, Leah sobs into her phone.

She doesn’t know why she’s crying. It’s been years, she should’ve been over you—and she is. She’s over you. She’s able to go through her day without wondering what you’re doing, able to sleep without having flashes of your memories together when she closes her eyes. So Leah doesn’t know why she’s crying but she figures it’s because there will always be a part of her that’ll stay in love with you.

Her cries stop, and she quickly wipes her tears away. “Sorry, Ale.”

“Hey, it’s okay.”

“I miss her a lot.”

“I know you do.”

“All of this makes me feel like we have a second chance,” Leah quietly confesses. “I don’t like it.”

“Why? You said it yourself, you miss her.”

“I do, but I don’t think a second chance would be good,” Leah sniffles. “I don’t want to go through the process of losing her again. I don’t think I can handle it.”

y/n

“When I first met her I was just immediately in love. Anyone who met her can agree, she was just so charming and charismatic. She's funny, she’s smart and she always says the right things. Who wouldn’t fall in love with her? When I first met her, I didn't think it would be serious. Just a silly crush on a girl I play football with, and I wasn’t stupid, I had no intentions of developing this crush into something more.

But as time went by, I realized that she was the most beautiful person I have ever met and the more she smiled at me and laughed along at my jokes despite how unfunny it was, the more I fell in love with her.

I was so lucky that she loved me too.

And we were together for a long time. We weren’t serious until later on, and we were on and off too. It was pretty damn amazing that we kept it a secret for so long. I can count with my fingers just how many knew about us. None of our family members knew and it was suffocating most times, but it was how it was. I didn’t think I was ready.

I’ve always known at the back of my mind that we will end. We’re public figures, everyone feels entitled to have an opinion about us… I knew that somehow that would cause our relationship to end someday. We were never going to last. Maybe I was pessimistic, but it was the brutal reality we were in.

It killed you, you know. Knowing that something wasn't meant to last. I loved her so much, sometimes I think even more than life itself. It killed me every time that voice ressurfaced in the back of my head, how it kept on repeating that I'll lose her one day.

That has always been the scary part, I think. Knowing that it will happen but not knowing when. But I never lived in the fear of it all falling apart. I savored every moment I had with her, every laugh and every dumb joke she told.

It still broke me, when I did eventually lose her. I didn't leave my apartment for weeks, I was a mess, but I didn’t cry. I didn’t think I was physically able to- I don’t know. I just felt numb. I think a part of me wasn’t allowing myself to cry because I didn’t want it to be real, even though I knew how real it was—I had been preparing for it ever since I knew I was in love with her.

How do you get over someone who you know was the love of your life? Someone you’ll never truly get over. I was so used to having her next to me when I wake up, having her close to me at night when I have nightmares, and suddenly it’s all gone. She’s gone and she’s not coming back, but I have to go on—the world doesn't stop for me.

So I forced myself to put on a smile after a game, forced myself to laugh with the people around me when it felt like my heart was being torn into pieces and it hurt every time I breathe.

That’s my biggest regret, I think. Letting her just walk away like that. Making her think that I love all this… fame more than I love her.

It’s silly ‘cause I’ll never love anything more than I love her.”

Leah

“How do I forget about her, Ale?” Leah digs the heels of her palms into her eye sockets. She doesn’t understand why the tears won’t stop flowing out.

“Bebita… some people you’re just not meant to forget.”

“She hurt me. It would be easier to hate her, but I don’t. I hate that I don’t.” Leah takes a deep breath. “And now she did the thing that I’ve always wanted her to do. Be honest about us. Not caring about what others would think… But she’s years too late. I hate that she’s years too late.”

“She wasn’t ready back then,” Alexia says from the other end. “It would’ve been a disaster if she was forced to do something she didn’t want to do.”

“I know!” Leah exclaims. “I would never force her into anything. I just wish that she could’ve figured it out sooner. Then maybe we’d still be together,” Leah gives a helpless laugh. “I would’ve fucking proposed, Ale. We could’ve been married, I don’t know!”

“Leah… Hermosa, listen to me,” Alexia tries to calm her down. Leah still feels like breaking down. “What did I say about spiraling into scenarios of what could’ve happened? It’s no use. This is how it all turned out. As much as it differs from what you wanted, accept it. I’m sorry that you and her didn’t work out, but you have to accept it.”

“I hate that I still love her. The ‘what could’ve been’ wouldn't hurt this much if I still didn’t love her.”

y/n

“I guess I’ll close this video by saying what I’ve always wanted to say to her. I don’t know if she’ll be watching, and a part of me hopes she’s not because I’m scared. She always scares me, you know? Not so much because of her attitude, but more due to the fact that I have all this love for her inside me that I sometimes get confused on where to put them. I don’t think I’ve ever loved someone this much.

Anyway… Leah.

My Leah. I hope you’re doing okay. The last time I heard your voice was a month ago to tell you about this video, and even through the phone I could hear how happy you are. So that’s good. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.

I know it’s been five long years and we’re both different people now, maybe you even have someone new… but sometimes, once in a blue moon, I still have dreams of us and a ‘someday’. Back then I didn't think we’d make it- we couldn't, at least that’s what I kept on telling myself. It all seems so silly now… I know times have changed and that two girls falling in love with each other isn’t the end of the world.

I know this is what you were trying to tell me that night I ruined things for good. You were telling me that we were going to be okay… but I wasn’t listening. I’m sorry. You should know that not fighting for you is the biggest mistake of my life.

But it is what it is, right? This is where we are and maybe we’re just not meant to make it.

Anyway, I don’t want to talk too much. I could go on and on ‘cause I have so much that I want to say to you, but… let me not. I don’t think it’s best to open up old wounds. All you should know is that I love and miss you with every breath I take, and despite everything, you’re still the love of my life. I’ve come to terms that maybe I’m not yours.

You’re always going to be my person, Leah. I’m sorry that all I did was cause you pain. I hope you have someone who brings you nothing but happiness.”

Leah

Despite the voice at the back of her mind telling her that it’s okay—that it’s fine if she wants to send a simple text message to her ex who just came out to the whole world—Leah still thinks it’s a bad idea.

Most of all, she thinks it’s a bad idea because she can’t go back to where she was—that lovesick girl who would do anything for you. Leah can feel her resolve crumbling the more she watches your video. She can feel herself itching to get across the screen of her phone and wrap you up in a hug. She hasn’t felt this way in a long time, or at least when she did, she immediately tucked them away.

The sun comes up and Leah doesn't realize that night-time has come and gone. Staring out the window, Leah sees the sun rise and a memory so bright flashes in her mind. Leah wonders if you like to stare out the sun and think of her.

Leah: I’m proud of you

Leah: just so you know, you made me the happiest I’ve ever been

y/n

London has almost 9 million people and out of all the time in a day, out of all the days in a week, you don't know why you have to be in Trafalgar Square at this exact moment.

Beth is talking next to you, explaining to you why you two should just head over to brunch and ditch the rest of your American friends who are wandering around. You aren't listening to any of it.

You aren't listening because your gaze is fixated on the blonde figure across the street, laughing along with the person next to her. You feel your stomach twist. It’s been a few months since you uploaded your video, which means it’s been a few months since Leah texted you.

Most of all, it’s been five years since you saw Leah in person.

Even from afar, you can see how Leah’s smile is still the same. You can see how Leah’s eyes crinkle in happiness and how Leah’s hand searches for that girl’s hand—just like how Leah used to reach for yours.

It hurts. More than you can admit.

You look away for a brief moment and when you look back, Leah is gone, but the sight of her smile will forever remain in your head.

Despite how you can feel your heart breaking into pieces, you also felt a newfound determination burning in your chest. Leah is the love of your life. You made the mistake of not fighting for her the first time, but you swore you’ll fight tooth and nail when the second time comes around.

Sometime in the future, you two will find your way back to each other. You’re sure of this, because a love like yours just doesn’t disappear into thin air.

In the future, you will proudly call Leah yours, one of you will propose and you’ll get married in New Zealand—just like what you talked about at sixteen with all the innocence in the world.

But for now, you have to learn how to be happy without Leah by your side. It’ll hurt but it’ll be worth it. You’re the sunflower in a dark night, certain that one day your sun will return.

3 years later

“Hi, this is y/n. Sorry I can’t answer the phone right now, but please leave a message and I’ll call you back.”

“Hey, y/n. It’s me. Leah. I got your number from Tobin. Uhm… Listen, I’m in Los Angeles for the weekend, and I still can’t figure out why you love this city so much. I reckon a local tour guide would be a good opportunity to help me try to understand this city and all its hidden beauty better. Uhm, yeah. Let me know if you’re free. My hotel is only a block away from your apartment. Sorry. That sounds creepy. Tobin told me where you live. Uhm. That’s it from me. Yeah. Call me. Or text me, whichever you prefer. …Bye.”

#leah williamson x reader #leah williamson #leah williamson imagine #awfc x reader #lionesses x reader #woso #woso x reader #woso community

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thexianzhoujade · 27 days

Text

YOU'RE NOT HER | genshin impact fanfiction. zhongli x gn!reader — heavy angst, hanahaki disease, hurt/no comfort, mentions of blood & gagging (almost vomit), death, ‘unrequited’ love

idle chatter. this is a reupload from my old blog so if you want to argue that i'm stealing, i'm literally robbing myself <3 library waiting list. @lovingluxury @dumbificat @starryshinyskies @ryuryuryuyurboat @ainescribe @bfjax @soleillunne @sangoqueenkoko

aventurine's addition. "alexi, darling, don't forget to link 'you should have been her' for the readers. it is the infamous second part, after all."

oh that man, that gorgeous, benevolent man you’d fell in love with all those moons ago; with dark hair that fades into a glowing orange, resemblant of the sunset and his own geo vision. you had fell in love, yes - you thought he had too. the thought crosses your mind whenever he’s not by your side, not within your grasp like he usually is. typically, the man was serving his job at the wangsheng funeral parlour as a consultant.

you grimace when the tight feeling in your ribcage suffocates you. it’s getting stronger as time goes on, knocking the breath right out of your lungs and leaving you hacking up blood into a white handkerchief. zhongli had expressed no ends of concern about the situation when he’d find the bloodied handkerchiefs scattered around your shared home, ushering you to doctor baizhu as soon as possible.

you had begged baizhu not to utter a word of your condition to zhongli. he returned your pleads with a sorrowful look.

how could your love be so unrequited? had you been the only one true to your word this whole time? the mere thought stings at your eyes, tears threatening to spill as you shakily wash the dishes. zhongli isn’t home, not for a few more hours. he said he had business to attend to - that meant it wasn’t work related. was he cheating? you shake the sour thought away from your head, scowling.

you wonder if the oh-so-wise man could ever read the wrinkles appearing on your skin, aging you with every passing concern that you don’t voice aloud, with every day that goes by where you’re suffocating from the inside out. he never mentions it, perhaps he simply does not care. you feel the knot in your throat, sickening as you gag and splutter into the soapy water of the sink. you keep gagging, the knot doesn’t budge and you’re filled with an overwhelming sense of nausea.

your body grows tired. you slip down to your knees, banging elbows and other limp limbs against kitchen cabinets as you go down. finally, with one last cough, the knot exits your mouth. it falls to the wood floorboards beneath you, slimy and covered in blood but undoubtedly recognised as a glaze lily. its petals are shut, you understand that there is no music, no lullaby to be heard to lull the glaze lily to bloom. it’s an ancient flower, one you always used to admire before this curse laid upon you.

the front door to your house opens, keys jingling in a specific man’s gloved hands as he enters. you hurry to throw the glaze lily out of the kitchen window, submerging your hands in the sink once more as the metallic taste of blood and lingering aftermath of a floral tang swarms your mouth. you hold your breath, hoping you didn’t have the appearance of someone who had just coughed up a flower so violently.

a pair of strong arms wrap around your waist, suddenly you’re hit with the faint smell of aged wine and familiar scent of freshly dug earth. you smile at the thought, leaning back into his chest despite the pain tearing at your lungs and the burning sensation left behind in your throat.

“you’ve been coughing again—” zhongli’s voice reverberates close to your ear, hot breath fanning over your skin and your eyes raise from the dirty water to your reflection in the kitchen window, where zhongli’s warm amber eyes are staring at you so deeply.

“it’s okay, my love, i promise,” you lie through your teeth, hoping the man sincerely couldn’t read through you the way he used to, “this time it was a smaller amount than the last…”

you try to sound cheerful in your approach to the topic, careful to maintain that personality he’d apparently fell in love with one day in liyue harbour. zhongli makes a noise - is he doubting you? you watch as a gloved hand raises, nearing your face before his thumb wipes gently at a trickle of blood leading from the corner of your lips.

“i’ll speak to doctor baizhu in the morning,” zhongli states firmly, you almost bite back the words that taste bitter about him ‘caring’ for you, “perhaps you need a higher dose of your medication.”

the medication in question surely had been a ruse to fool the man, though you did not expect it to have worked. changsheng had uttered that you could not leave the bubu pharmacy without some form of medication, it’d look absurd in the eyes of the wangsheng funeral parlour consultant. in agreement, baizhu had qiqi mix violetgrass powder with sugar - the instructions were simple, mix it into the hot tea you’d drink with zhongli every evening.

it was sweet, not at all bitter and the scent of violetgrass made it bearable. apparently the inclusion of herbal properties was enough to fool your dearest partner or so you thought.

—

it’s hard to understand the fine line between a lie and a truth when the past few months, you’d been dating a man for someone whomst he was not. it was a struggle to understand the situation but it kept you up for endless nights, counting stars and tending to the numerous flora you’d planted in the garden underneath the moonlight - courtesy of your friend the traveler for appearing with so many countless seeds of blooms from across teyvat.

yet as you sit on the grass, staring at the pile of dead - and dying - glaze lilies you had acquired, the stars twinkling endlessly above you, you understood why he’d done it. he was judicious, hoping to protect you from his past yet keep you as his future. the thought made that pain in your chest tighten. you let out a futile whimper into the quiet night.

as you ponder zhongli’s status as liyue’s archon - the geo archon of all people, you begin to question your previous doubts. your breaths become struggled, your chest heaving as you lay on your back for some relief. trembling fingertips brush amongst blades of grass, hoping for a distraction as tears spill down your cheeks.

liyue is a beautiful country with vast mountains and yellowed plains that seem to stretch endlessly. its civilisation had become fruitful at the expense of liyue harbor, bustling with trade and the thing your partner had appeared to love the most; contracts. he has every right to be proud of the nation liyue had built to this day, despite claiming that he’d ultimately retired - “the people can do without me, they’ve proved that much.”

blood trickles from your mouth but it’s not gentle, it’s a rush, like a waterfall as it spills down the sides of your face and pools on the grass below you. it’s littered in an array of blue and white petals, matching that of glaze lilies - a flower you’d grown to hate. you struggle to get oxygen into your lungs with the rising level of blood that doesn’t dissipate from your parted lips, suffocating you as you try to no ends to breathe through your nose.

that is, if there was room in your lungs for such oxygen. twists and turns of branches and roots that climb to the walls of your organs, painting them with glaze lilies and filling them with fallen petals every time a flower wilts from the unreasonable conditions inside your body.

you’re proud of liyue; the magnificent, beautiful nation of geo that you got to experience in all of its glory. zhongli often times referred to liyue with feminine pronouns and as the light dies from your eyes and your chest ceases to rise, you can only think one thing with your last dying breath.

you’re not her.

⊹˚₊‧───────────────‧₊˚⊹

#alexi writes 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔 #zhongli x reader #genshin zhongli #zhongli angst #genshin impact #genshin angst #genshin x reader

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https-furina · 7 months

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✎ you’re not her. ft. zhongli x fem!reader content. heavy angst, hanahaki disease, hurt/no comfort, mentions of blood & gagging (almost vomit), death, ‘unrequited’ love. w.c. tba.

you should have been her — part two.

you had begged baizhu not to utter a word of your condition to zhongli. he returned your pleads with a sorrowful look.

“it’s okay, my love, i promise,” you lie through your teeth, hoping the man sincerely couldn’t read through you the way he used to, “this time it was a smaller amount than the last…”

it was sweet, not at all bitter and the scent of violetgrass made it bearable. apparently the inclusion of herbal properties was enough to fool your dearest partner or so you thought.

—

you’re not her.

#꒰꒰・♡ cold cases #https-furina #zhongli #genshin zhongli #genshin impact zhongli #zhongli x you #zhongli x reader #zhongli angst #genshin #genshin impact #genshin angst #genshin impact angst

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h4rring1on · 2 years

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hello!! if you can and want, could you write some angst with steve x fem!reader in which reader feels insecure - in a way that she thinks she's annoying because she talks too much and sometimes too loud, and one day, steve has the party over for a movie night and one of the kids mention that she talks too much and she's too loud while steve goes into the kitchen for something (or to the bathroom, whatever). so from that moment on she tries to speak as little as possible until steve brings it up to her one day and comforts her about it.

i'm sorry if it's too specific, if you can't do it, it's alright! your writings are some of my favourites on tumblr!!! 🌼💗

you and steve never really had any major problems, little fights every now and then but it wasn’t big. you still loved each other, you completed each other

but sometimes, just sometimes, you’d wonder if you really did complete steve. moments like this would always come up, like you’d be play fighting with steve and you’d say “i’m gonna catch you!” a bit too loud

when that would happen, you’d quiet down, you’d be the same, just calmer and more quiet. steve never really notice it until one day, where it became way too clear for him not to.

you were with the party, everyone was wrapped around blankets, popcorn and snacks in hand as they watched the movie, steve was next to you, holding you close as you watched

“wait i don’t get it—how did all that happen when her boyfriend was just sleeping, he must’ve noticed, right?” you asked

“hm, don’t think so, it was outside so he couldn’t have heard it” steve explained

“ohh, yeah right” you said, steve then told you he was gonna go get more snacks from the kitchen

“that one’s my favorite” you pointed to the girl on the screen, you liked talking about the characters and movie overall

“oh my god” mike whined

“we get it, jesus” lucas said

“what the hell, guys?” dustin said

“im sorry dustin i cant take it anymore” mike said, “cant you go one minute without talking? it’s so annoying! we can barely hear the movie because of how loud you are!” mike rolled his eyes and dustin smacked him

“oh…i’m sorry” was all you said, you turned back to the movie and snuggled closer into your blanket, wishing you could hide under it forever. you wanted to disappear, to go away.

you zoned out as the scene kept replaying in your head, you knew it. you finally knew what they truly think of you, what they hate about you. and it was exactly what you hated about yourself

you felt steve sit next to you, making you snap back to reality

“got you your favorite” he smiled and gave you the bag, you slightly smiled and ate in silence

ever since that night, you barely spoke. when you’d visit steve, you’d just listen and nod when he’s speaking. only time you’d actually talk is when you had to give a verbal response.

even then, it was low and wasn’t the way you used to talk, it was worse when you were around the party, you wouldn’t utter a single sound. you thought nobody would notice, but steve did. very much.

steve was working robin’s shift, so it was just you and him, he called you earlier, asking if you could come over since he’s closing the store now, you muttered a small ‘mhm’ and went to the store, helping him close up

he was talking to you about one of the customers that came today, and how they’d taken so long to decide what movie they wanted

“can you believe it? 45 minutes just to pick ghostbusters, it’s not even that hard of a decision to make” he said as he put away the tapes, he looked to you and saw you nodding

“let’s go sit for a bit, take a little break” he said and you nodded again, he sat in front of you, holding your hand

he called your name, and you shook your head in question, “you know i love you, right?” he said and you nodded, “you know you can tell me anything, right?” and you nodded yet again

“did i do something?” he asked and you furrowed your eyebrows and shook your head, “talk to me” he said, his tone frustrated

“no” you shook your head

“then tell me what’s wrong” he asked and you stayed silent, “i know somethings wrong, please—tell me why are you acting this way?”

“what way—“

“are you serious?” he cut in, “you’ve barely said a word to me for the past few days, i know theres a reason—talk to me, please.”

you looked at him for a bit and looked down, “there’s nothing wrong, okay? just—some people finally decided be brave enough to tell me the truth”

“what truth? what people—“

“the truth is that im annoying!” you snapped, “that im annoying—and loud, and talkative. and im happy to hear it because they’re not wrong. they’re not! i should actually thank them for finally telling me what’s wrong with me.” you sighed

steve looked at you with such hurt in his eyes, “who said that?” he asked in a low voice

“why do you even care—”

“why do i even ca—are you—because it’s a lie! everything—they’re all lies! baby, who cares if you like to talk about things more than others do, who cares if you’re loud? you’re you and thats what matters, whoever said that is saying complete bullshit, and i don’t care about it. i just—“ he sighed and held your hand tighter, “i miss your voice, i miss the way you get excited about things, i miss the way you talk on and on and on, i miss you. i miss you, peach.”

a smile found its way on your face and you hugged him tight, “i love you, stevie” you said

“i love you too” he smiled, a feeling of comfort finally coming back to him, to hear you and have you in his arms again.

you two held onto each other for a bit before letting go, “now, you wanna tell me who in their right mind said that?”

#stranger things 4 #stranger things x reader #steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington angst #stranger things fluff #steve harrington x plus sized reader #steve harrington x mayfield!reader #steve harrington x original character #steve harrington x henderson!reader #steve harrington x reader angst #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x y:n #steve harrington x female!reader

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indieyuugure · 2 months

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Hi Indiee!!

I luv ur art sososososo much and I was wondering if you have any messy sketches laying around, whether it’s future events for Tms or Indie Tmnt :D (The indie leo angst from the invasion/farmhouse arc is slowly taking control of my body… uh oh)

Pls take your time and drink lots of water!

Aw righty, let’s see what I’ve got.

Uh, let’s see,

Some newer test designs for The Shredder’s and Karai’s battle armor. I went for more traditional samurai armor.

Me re-working how the Kraang tech works, getting an idea, and then spending like 3+ hours on a drawing 😅

The afterwards of this comic

The pre-cursor to Raph meeting Mrs. Morrison (I have more sketches of it but most of them are just outlines of text)

I decided to add a Battle Nexus arc in which Renet teleports them to a dimension, but then the Dimension Scepter dies so they’re stuck there for who knows how long. The turtles get arrested, but then a very professional woman interested in making dealy-doos (that she will most likely change the terms of at the last second) pays them out on the condition that they fight in her Battle Nexus Arena. The boys meet a whole bunch of people from other dimensions(Usagi) and even some from their own(Traximus). The specific picture I gave is designs for Usagi. Leo has not had enough time to recover from his fight with Shredder mentally and, during is fight with Usagi, breaks down in an episode and goes psycho.

The Banned for Life posters on the bulletin boards at April’s school. The boys will live on through that school’s history as those random Japanese boys straight out of a J-pop band that wreaked havoc on the school for all of 20 minutes then disappeared, never to be seen again.

Lol, hope you like these ^v^ just some random doodles I had.

#tmnt #q&a #indie’s turtles #indie tmnt #ninja turtles #the mutation situation #Indie tmnt karai #Indie tmnt shredder #indie tmnt leo #indie tmnt raph #indie tmnt donnie #indie tmnt mikey #Indie tmnt usagi #Remind me to never add this many tags to a post again #little doodles

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unboundprompts · 5 months

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Can I get some prompts of a single parent struggling to take care of a baby? Like to the point where they are starting to lose sleep or is just that stressed? The baby could be theirs or one they adopted/found abandoned. I really don't mind if it's either Angst or Fluff. Anyways I know this is a bit specific and I hope it's not too much. I really love all of your prompts! I hope you have a wonderful day/night! Keep up the fantastic prompts! ❤️❤️❤️

Thank you for the kind words!

Single Parenting Prompts

-> feel free to edit and adjust pronouns as you see fit.

"I'm just so afraid of messing it up," she admitted, her voice small. "Everything I do matters, and one wrong move could alter their entire future." She spared a glance at the baby asleep in their crib, blissfully unaware of the uncertainty and fear she was feeling.

"When they get older, they're going to realize everything you've done for them. There will be bumps in the road, there always is. But at the end of the day, they're going to see how hard you tried to give them the perfect life. And that's what they're going to remember."

He felt like pulling his hair out. "I haven't slept in weeks," he admitted, voice strained and dark spots under his eyes prominent. "I didn't realize how hard it was to take care of a baby."

They blinked open their eyes at the sound of the baby crying. There goes any hope of getting a full night's rest. They drag themselves out of bed and lift the baby from the crib. She practically melts into their touch, tears easing up at just the notion of being held. "It's going to be a long night, huh?" They ask the baby, already rubbing soothing circles on her back.

Parenting was hard. A lot harder than he thought it was going to be. But it was moments like these-- when the baby looked up at him like he was their entire world with a smile on their face-- that made it worth it.

"Your grandmother used to sing this to me," she said softly to the baby in her arms, "every night before bed."

They needed a break. They needed to step back. They needed to... they didn't know what they needed to do. Never in a million years did they think they would be responsible for caring for a baby. They definitely hadn't planned on it, that was for sure. But, now they had one. And they hadn't the slightest clue of what to do with it.

"This baby needs me, right now," she said with force in her lungs. "I don't have a single idea of what I'm doing, but that doesn't change the fact that it is my responsibility. And I'm going to take care of it."

#my toxic trait is that I call babies “it”#writing prompts #dialogue prompt #creative writing #writeblr #story prompt #prompt list #soft prompts #ask box prompts #parenting prompts #baby prompts #caretaker prompts

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kjhbsies · 3 months

Text

PT II: Flowers of Despair

Ellie Williams x fem!reader (wc: 3, 248)

Synopsis: Will a love bloom even if your marriage is not real? Will Ellie Williams find a way to open her heart again?

Warnings: part II of the Waiting Room fan fiction. ellie is an asshole. major angst??? mixed signals??? not proofread and may have grammar errors. there will be a last part of this fic. happy reading!

pt. i pt. iii

In the first week you two moved into your dream house, you were beyond nervous. You did not expect for this to happen so quickly. Your father insisted that Ellie and you should get together for the meantime, while preparing for the wedding. Ellie agreed, saying that there was no problem, so who you are to decline such a wonderful offer.

This was your dream home; it was perfect. It was a fairly huge house with big doors and a great garden. You specifically bought this months before, and was staying here every now and then. It was near the farm, so it was serene and beautiful. You loved the landscapes here since you liked to paint everywhere.

But now, you aren’t sure how to feel.

“This is my room.” You said, pointing out the bedroom on your right as the both of you ascended through the second floor. “I’m sorry if it’s somehow messy, I just did not have the time to fix it up.” You smiled. “Your bags are already in there, but the maids will arrange it in the closet for you when they’re finished cleaning up the living room.”

“We’re not sleeping in different bedrooms?” Ellie scanned the whole area. “Or you insisted that we’ll get to share the same bed?” She looked at you with her stoic face.

Ellie watched as the color of your face drained out. You became pale when you heard her say that. Ellie has no problem sharing a room with you. Hell, she can’t even remember how many girls she has on her bed every night. But, the problem is, Ellie just wanted to taunt you because, well, she can be an asshole sometimes.

“Oh! I-I did not- I thought that’s what married couples do, you know, share the same bed.” You rambled, heart beating fast.

This is so humiliating, you thought.

Ellie chuckled. Heart warming up as she looked at you. You were so fucking…

Cute?

“But, we’re not supposed to be like those normal married couples, aren’t we? I thought we had an agreement, babe. Don’t fall in love with me.”

“Then don’t call me babe.” Your face scrunched up at her. “You don’t have to remind me every single day about our arrangement, you know? I’m not an idiot. I can hear you loud and clear.” You gulped. Ellie’s jaw tightened.

Am I an asshole? You looked sad, and something inside me hated it. She thought.

You looked up at her with soft eyes. “Well, it’s been a stressful evening. Let’s just rest. I’ll call one of the maids so they can bring your clothes to your room. You can just pick any bedroom you’d like.” You said before quickly going inside.

You hated it.

You hated how she’s just in front of you, but you can’t even touch her.

You hated how she’s just within your reach but you can’t get her. You will not get her.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

One month.

One month is all it would take until you and Ellie will be married. And then, you can get your inheritance. Ellie would still endure a few weeks with you. After she gets the money, you and her can get a divorce, and if it’s possible, Ellie will get Dina again, and the three of them can live as a happy family.

But what about you?

Nah, it’s fine. Ellie doesn’t really care.

“You can cook?” Ellie asked surprisingly when she saw you in the kitchen. She is walking straight beside you. She ignored how you looked great in your sundress and floral apron. There it goes again, the bows in your hair look adorable. She shut down her eyes, mentally scolding herself when she caught herself looking like a fucking creep.

You glanced back at her. Your heart skipped a beat when she settled beside you, leaning her back at the counter while her tattooed arms were folded in her chest. She’s just wearing a plain slim fit shirt and a pair of black trousers. Her auburn hair was tied in a bun and her freckles looked really good in the sunlight. “Yeah. I make really good pastas. Guess you can say that it was my specialty.”

“I thought rich girls can’t cook.”

“And I thought we shouldn’t bother each other. So, why are you here?” You quipped back.

Ellie looked at you in amusement. Good catch. Damn. “I was… bored.” Even she was not convinced with her statement. To be honest, Ellie doesn’t even know why she went up to talk to you. She’s just intrigued when she smelt the aroma of the food and was surprised when you were the one making it.

When she first tasted the pasta, you were looking straight at her, waiting for Ellie’s comments. And it made her uneasy. To say, your gaze made her nervous. So, she’s slowly devouring the food in front of her, chewing it gently. And damn, you really are a great chef.

“Was it good?” You asked, curiously.

“Yeah. Fuck, I was surprised that you can cook because, you know, you’re a ric-”

You shook your head, looking at her unamused. “Please don’t say rich girl.”

Ellie laughed.

Ellie fucking laughed for the first time.

Oh, this arrangement will fuck you up so bad.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

On a Sunday afternoon, Ellie found herself in the garden, sitting in the grass, while holding her guitar. You, however, would usually be at the same spot while painting. When you found Ellie there, you decided to quickly walk away from her.

“You can sit with me, you know.” Ellie said when she sensed you around.

“Uh…” You hesitated, the grip on your easel and canvas became strong. “Sure.” You gave in immediately.

You settled beside her as you began setting your art materials up. You looked at Ellie while trying to strum her guitar. Well, you’ve known that she has the skills because you’ve always seen her playing that. And it shocked you to the core, but Ellie has a beautiful voice.

“This is the first time that I picked this thing up.” Ellie blurted. “I swore that I wouldn’t play guitar again since…” She stopped talking. And you have an idea of what she might've been talking about.

“Do you still like her?” You asked, gripping on the paint brush as tight as you can, fingernails digging through your palms.

Ellie’s mood turned sour. “That’s none of your fucking business, princess.”

“I was just asking.”

“Well, you shouldn't. Don’t ever bring her up again. As a matter of fact, we shouldn’t even talk with each other.” Ellie said before standing up while grabbing her guitar.

Your eyes drop as you can feel lumps in your throat when you’re holding your tears back.

Ellie did not know why she became so defensive. When anyone brings up Dina, her mind automatically flashes back to everything they’ve done. And as much as she tries to conceal or hide it at the back of her mind, Ellie can’t seem to get away from it.

She looked back and found you staring down at your lap when guilt started flooding her brain. Ellie wanted to apologize then and there but her pride made her walk away.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

The argument happened three days ago. You never talked to Ellie since the incident, and she didn’t even try to spare a glance at you either. The house has been eerily quiet and cold since that happened. Martha, your maid seemed to sense the tension between you two.

Every day, you’re always the one who wakes up earlier to make and eat breakfast for the two of you. You did not want to eat three times a day with her, and Ellie also felt the same way.

Did she?

I mean, to Ellie’s surprise, she’d wake up with food on the table everyday. And even though she tried to deny it, she’s always fascinated with how you cook and how delicious those meals are. It is obvious that you try to avoid her every day. And Ellie did not know whether she would be grateful or annoyed. Well, why would she even get annoyed, right? She asked for it. And now that you’re giving it to her, why is she always catching herself trying to find you every day?

To make it short, she’s an idiot.

Now, both of you were at Jackson to try wedding dresses. Your mother insisted that she knows the best tailor in town and that’s where the both of you were.

“Ok, twirl.” Your mom said when you stepped out of the changing room.

“I don’t like how it fits me. I can’t breathe.” You said while looking at your figure in the mirror.

“Try another one, mija. We have so many dresses here.” The old lady smiled at you and you nodded. Going back to the same changing room to try the dress that captured your eye.

Ellie passed by and your mom called her. “Ellie! How’d the fitting go?”

“It went well and faster than I expected.” Ellie chuckled.

“Well. Sit here and watch your future wife. I think she’ll like the last dress.” Your mom patted the seat beside her and Ellie hesitated for a second before she nodded and sat down.

You walked out of the changing room while wearing the first wedding dress that caught your eye. It fits you like a glove, and it is really flattering. Your steps halted when you saw Ellie staring right at you.

“Do you like it?” The owner asked happily. “It really brings out your beauty.”

Ellie silently agreed. She can’t keep her eyes away from you and how stunning you looked. Her mouth gapes, trying to find a word that best describes you at the moment but how her heart fluttered made her weak. Both of you are staring at each other’s eyes and you can’t seem to look away.

“Doesn’t she look great, Ellie?” Your mom asked Ellie.

She wasn’t even supposed to talk to you. Both of you shouldn’t even interact, let alone stare at each other like this. But there’s no choice.

“Yes.” Ellie gulped. “You look… great.” She cursed at herself. Great? Idiot, she’s more than that.

You try to fight off a huge smile so you look down, afraid that you just look like a stupid highschool girl at the moment. You turned your back at her immediately before nodding to the tailor.

“Yes I’ll get it since my wife likes it too.”

God, both of you were supposed to be mad at each other, right?

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Throughout the preparation for the wedding, both you and Ellie were always at Jackson. Your morning routine consisted of you waking up at 7:00 in the morning to cook and eat breakfast, and read a book for an hour before Ellie woke up. And when the clock strikes at 9:00 AM, it is your time to stand up to go into your room, take a long bath and get ready.

Ellie will meet you outside, in the car, to go to Jackson. And it is awkwardly silent and painful. Jackson is a 30 minute drive and the two of you weren’t even letting out even a small quip, nor glance at each other as the two of you agreed.

Well, you wanted to apologize to Ellie for bringing Dina up in that conversation, three weeks ago. But you can’t seem to find the courage to talk to her. You did not know how much Dina really meant to Ellie up until now that even though it’s you that she shares the same house with, she can’t seem to forget her. This thought haunted you every night, but you can’t really blame Ellie. Dina is her soulmate, and you’re just a huge hindrance.

Besides, both of you almost never agree on anything. You loved the shades of pink and blue for your wedding, and Ellie will say that it is such the corniest color. While trying to make the perfect wedding invitation, Ellie would go up beside you to propose something really annoying. Ellie loved carrot cake but you hated the hell out of it that almost caused a huge fight in the shop. When things get heated between you two, you will just shut up because you can’t create a huge scene, especially that both of your parents are around.

Today is your break from her since after the wedding tomorrow, you would be tied to her. Not forever, but maybe months, or years, even. Ellie and you decided to have a girl’s and guy’s day before the wedding. You two would stay here at Jackson for the night – in her old house.

“We’re here.” Ellie said. You nodded and opened the door and she waited for you to get out before stepping outside. Ellie smiled widely as she saw her friends. Everyone of them started hugging and clapping each other’s back.

“Yo, man! I never thought you would be married.” Jesse said happily.

“Was that an insult?” She asked before playfully smacking him.

“Oh, hey, Y/N, if Ellie did something really shitty, you can just go at me. I’m really good at comforting pretty girls.” The masculine girl went up at you, grinning, while holding out her hand. “I’m Julie, by the way.”

“Uh…” You hesitated before looking at Ellie who didn't really look pleased. And seconds later, she is hitting Julie’s head hard.

“That’s my wife, you shit.”

Jesse and Julie shared the most obnoxious laugh.

“Okay, guys, I’ll just leave you all.” You smiled. “Ellie, I’ll just meet up with the girls. I’ll see you at your house later.” You said, waving at them.

“Wait, wait, where’s Ellie’s kiss?” Jesse asked.

“Dude shut up.” Ellie immediately answered.

“Come on, guys. You don’t kiss?” He asked again. “Ellie, what happened to your game, dude?” He taunted.

“It’s fine.” You looked at Ellie reassuringly before tip-toeing to kiss her in the lips. It was sudden, and it was just a quick peck but your heart hammered and you felt like it would come right out of your throat. “Bye.” You whispered softly before turning away.

Ellie felt frozen at the moment. Shit, she can still feel your lips at her. The scent of your lip gloss lingered at her and it’s all that she could smell right now. What the fuck? What the fuck are you doing to her?

Ellie watched your figure as you were walking through your friends. She was so glad that you quickly went away without looking at her, or else Ellie would be caught dead right there and then.

You’re so fucking confusing.

Ellie hated it.

Ellie hated you.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

You were staring at Ellie’s bedroom, scanning every little thing in here. Joel said that this has been her bed since she was nine years old. An old guitar was sitting near her windows, as well as a pile of books about spaces, science, dinosaurs, as well as a couple of ‘No Pun Intended’ books in different volumes.

You were shocked that she knows how to sketch when you found some sketchbooks on her desk. Some were filled up until the last page, but there are some who weren’t even touched. When you opened one, you saw that her sketches mainly consisted of horses, Joel, and Dina. She draws her beautifully, making her a goddess, just like what she sees in her eyes. Dina is her muse, and both of them can create a masterpiece. Somewhere in your heart was pierced as you were thinking about it. Ellie probably stopped sketching when she left, and has never touched a pencil ever since.

The door opened. And it showed a drunk Ellie. You sat up, quickly walking away at her desk and releasing the grip on one of her sketches.

“The fuck are you doing?” Ellie immediately walked up to hide her arts.

“I’m sorry. I just got carried away looking at-”

“Why are you here, anyway?” She looked at you angrily.

You sighed heavily. You did not want another fight with her. “Where am I supposed to be?”

“At your friends or something?”

You laughed sarcastically. “You really do hate me that much, huh?” Slowly, you were walking towards her.

She grinned. “Yeah. I guess you can say that you’re not my favorite person.”

“But you’re marrying me. Tomorrow.”

She stepped forward, looking down at you with a taunting gaze. “Guess I would just deal with it.” Ellie started grabbing something on her dresser. “I’m sleeping on the floor. You can have my bed.”

You stood there, feeling ridiculous. “This is what you called ‘dealing with it?’ We’re about to get married tomorrow, and you are still a coward.”

Ellie laughed loudly. She can feel her drunkenness start to wash away from her veins as you keep on talking. Yes, both of you shouldn’t even be arguing and she could just be the bigger person and ignore you but she just physically, and mentally can’t.

“What did you just call me?” She said, looking at you with squinted eyes.

“You’re a coward. I thought you brought a lot of girls here before, so why can’t you stand sharing a bed with me?” You asked, challenging her.

Ellie’s jaw tightened while she’s looking at you. Fuck, she can’t even say something back at you because you are making a lot of sense.

You rolled your eyes at her when she just stood there, frozen. Slowly, you went to her bed and covered yourself under the blanket.

There’s a nightstand beside you. In this, there’s a small lamp, a lot of toy figurines, coins, and a portrait of Ellie. She’s smiling at the camera, her auburn hair is tied in a bun and she’s wearing a tank top – revealing her muscles. You figured out that it was when she’s 19 – where she’s still a handsome girl you first admired. If you told your 16 years old self that you are marrying Ellie Williams, she would be beyond happy. She might faint, really. But right now, Ellie isn’t the girl you thought she’d be.

Everyone was right. She’s an asshole.

You sighed heavily as you felt the mattress beside you moved. Ellie lifted the blanket and settled herself under it. You and Ellie were sleeping both at your backs to avoid facing each other.

Why are you still wasting your time with her? Ellie wouldn’t love you no matter how hard you try. Maybe it is the time to accept the fact that she wouldn’t be yours here, or maybe in another lifetime.

She wants Dina.

And you’re not her.

“Is this a good idea?” You asked her suddenly. “We always fight and I hate it because I’m not made for it.” You shut your eyes tightly as tears started streaming down, wetting the bed underneath. “I just want to love you.” You whispered, confessing your feelings for her.

Ellie gulped, trying to remove the lump on her throat. “I told you not to fall in love with me.” She said, softly. She can feel a familiar ache in her heart. Like the same thing when her mom left her, when Shimmer died, and when Dina left. She tried so hard to avoid those, protecting her feelings so hard that she even forgot that she still had a heart.

Until you came.

You smiled sadly. “Too late, Ellie. I have loved you since we were sixteen.”

#ellie williams fanfic #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x reader angst #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams #ellie williams fanfiction

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neil-gaiman · 1 year

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Hi,

My name is Hayden and this is less an ask, more a rhetorical “how did you do this?!” and "this is really weird and cool please listen!" I'm not sure if you'll be interested but it's a very strange, very real story of coincidences melting my brain. I hope you find it as wonderful as it felt.

So last winter/spring I was in the last year of my undergrad degree in Twickenham. On the weekends I worked at a cocktail bar in the area -the Richmond, London area to be specific. During this time I started listening to The Sandman Audiobook on Audible. I’ve always wanted to read the graphic novel, I knew I’d like it, it’s exactly my type of fiction but something always stopped me a few pages in, I was enjoying it but it just wasn't going in (maybe it was my dyslexia or ADHD or the stress of 3rd year Uni). So I started listening to the Audiobook. It was amazing. It pulled me into the world immediately and I could listen when I while doing other things and still be engrossed. As a Creative Writing/Film student it inspired me, motivating me to write my dissertation, fueling my creativity. I would listen every spear chance I could, when I cleaned my room, as I did laundry, on my walks to lectures, on the bus to work...

I would even get to Richmond 30 minutes early so I could sit on the Green and listen for a little longer. On my breaks I would sit in the little office at the top of the building, eating my dinner at 11pm and listening to the tales of Dream of the endless. The bar was (and still is) on Brewers Lane, a narrow little cobbled-Alley that goes between Richmond Green and the high street. It's a beautiful, old bar, definitely haunted and full of memories, full of stories.

A few months later, I had finished the Audiobooks (the 2 that were out at the time), I no longer worked at the bar, I had graduated with a First Class Joint Honours. This is when The Sandman Series came out. I watch it and to my delight when it's good, more than good. The acting, production and characterisation were everything I could have wanted. I then get to Episode 6, The Sound of Her Wings. Adapted beautifully from the graphic novel. While I watch I start to recognise the environment Dream and Death were in, the park bench seemed familiar. I think "that's just London parks, they're all pretty much the same". Then the siblings start walking, and I start to recognise some landmarks of Twickenham, pubs by the river that were too expensive for me and my friends, old wisteria-covered streets I walked down with people I no longer talk to. I'm already thinking this is so cool, seeing Dream and Death walk around these places I spent the last 3 years of my life around.

Then they're back in the park. And I see it. no doubt. It's Richmond Green! The same place I would sit and listen to the audiobooks! the exact place I sat! daydreaming, people-watching and listening. Where I pictured these exact characters in my mind's eye. The embodiment of story and imagination was standing on the Green that I had imagined him on.

Dream and death say their goodbyes and I am full of wonder, disbelief and some other hard-to-define emotion. Dream walks away from his older sister. He enters an alley. No, a lane. He's walking down Brewers Lane. The Lane I worked on for a year. The Lane I sat above listening to Lord Morpheus in existential angst and now he was walking below it. Waking among the people. Walking past the shops I passed. At that moment I felt like I had willed him into existence. At this point, my mind was well and truly blown. Then he came to just outside the Bar, my Bar, and the scene ends. The scene ends at the very same place I would stand, at 2am, smoking with my friends after a hard shift, before we'd go back inside, and make each other the most extravagant drinks we could come up with and talk til 5am. Then stumble back to that spot, say our goodbyes and make our way home. And I had just seen Dream stand there.

I know this is all a coincidence, that Tom and Kirby aren't actually Dream and Death. I didn't actually will the TV series into the world. Lots of stuff is filmed in Richmond, it was probably filmed before I even worked there and I could have been listening to any audiobook at the time. It's not a magical occurrence, it's scratches on shiny metal, random and without meaning. But for that moment, watching that episode, You (and 50+ other people) held up a flame to the scratches, letting me see all the meaning and purposeful patterns I could ever want. And that's just a bit magical I think.

But yeah, I think it's pretty clear you've somehow gotten directly into my brain, Netflix knows something and the show was made specifically for me!

That's magic.

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rezeulaz · 6 months

Text

“AS THE WORLD CAVES IN”

pairing: neuvilette x fem!reader

synopsis: in a world where you, a mere mortal, embark on a noble quest to uncover the secrets of the primordial sea, a heartwarming twist awaits. as the citizens of fontaine come together, armed with evidence of what they perceive as your 'illegal' actions, your beloved neuvilette is entrusted with the task of offering his tender and considerate judgment."

genre: angst. reader is a scientist. warnings: mentions of death

wc: 848 words

💌: i have nothing against furina </3 it’s only for the plot !! anw, ily neu, my new favourite hydro man :3

"i shall not allow this matter to remain unaddressed. countless innocent lives have been unjustly taken, vanishing without a trace. it is my duty to prevent the past from repeating itself, to stop what they have inflicted upon my sister." she rambles, skimming through her pile of new research papers collected by the fontaine research institute.

"mon ange, i understand that you are dealing with stress in regards to your sister’s disappearance being connected to the serial disappearances, but you must remember we should stand by the law." neuvilette gazes intently into her eyes, revealing a genuine and heartfelt concern.

"i believe you do not understand as much as you say you do, monsieur. i am a mortal; you have lived for centuries, and i'd assume it hasn’t occurred to you the feeling of losing a loved one." she gets up, leaving a perplexed neuvilette, she called him. monsieur? other than the fact that she talked to him that way, she called him neu, or whatever endearment she could think of, but now, monsieur?

it had been 2 days since the talk she had with neuvilette. she tried to pay no mind to it. 'i've got more important things to achieve and more important things to learn.’ she tries to convince herself. but no matter what she did, she could never forget the look on neuvilette’s face when she left. she never wanted to; she didn’t have a choice. what more could she do when even her beloved neuvillete is not on her side?

she then hears a knock on her door—a very aggressive knock, to be more specific. she goes on to open the door, wondering who it could be at this ungodly hour.

"how may i hel-"she was cut off by two gardes putting handcuffs on her.

"y/n l/n, you stand accused of delving into the depths of the 'primordial sea,' accessing forbidden information, and trespassing into restricted areas without the necessary permits. you retain the right to maintain your silence and will be provided the opportunity to secure legal counsel to represent you in a court of law." the gardes say. you tried to protest, but you could only do so much.

"your beloved, Neuvilette, has been caught doing unlawful activities? It is indeed regrettable. i’ve been eager to make her acquaintance." the hydro archon stated to neuvilette, who was absorbed in the letter detailing your arrest.

"i must address this," neuvilette attempted to object, but furina swiftly interjected, her tone stern. "you do realize that you have no influence to manipulate the course of the law, neuvilette? the oratrice mecanique d’analyse cardinale is the one who decides in this matter, not you."

neuvilette walks out of the door, impatiently waiting for the trial to commence.

during the trial, neuvilette couldn’t stop looking at you. the chief justice was known for his stern and neutral look, but this time, he looked at you with genuine sadness and concern.

it was the people of fontaine against you, the prophecy—it had been blamed that you were trying to sabotage the people of fontaine. there was enough evidence that you, in fact, tried to take part in illegal activities just to uncover the truth about the primordial sea.

after the trial, it was unclear what your punishment would be. neuvilette finally spoke.

"we now turn to the oratrice mecanique d'analyse cardinale to render the final verdict on the charges." "according to the judgment of the oratrice mecanique d'analyse cardinale," he continues.

"y/n l/n, to be punished via..." he then turns pale; one could not imagine how he could get any more paler than he is.

"the death sentence." he finally states, his voice shaking.

the people of fontaine cheered, even the hydro archon herself. you, on the other hand, were so shocked that you couldn’t even manage to utter a word.

the day finally came, and you were being executed. it made you laugh that you were being executed before the man responsible for the serial disappearance case. neuvilette has been forbidden to talk to you ever since you received that punishment. it pains you to know that your last interaction was you leaving him. they cheered—everyone watching, they did. thinking that now that you are gone, the sin of the people has been washed away. fontaine will no longer be submerged underwater.

fools, they are fools. you think to yourself.

"i believe it would be rightful for me, your beloved hydro archon, to do this!" with that, everything became black to you. furina had pressed the machine, whose goal was to decapitate you.

for a while, everyone was filled with joy—then boredom. leading for them to exit the venue, preparing for their celebration of “breaking” the prophecy.

neuviellete ran to you without any thoughts; he had been able to serve justice to everyone else in fontaine. but this time, why couldn’t he? why couldn’t he when it was his beloved? why?

"i’m sorry, mon ange." he says, looking at the two parts of your body that have been cut.

and then—it rained.

the hydro dragon weeps.

#neuvillette #fontaine #neuvilette genshin #neuvilette x reader #neuvilette x you #genshin impact neuvilette #neuvilette angst #neuvilette x y/n #neuvilette imagine #angst #genshin angst #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin impact x y/n #genshin x reader #genshin x you #genshin x y/n

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artemish · 6 months

Text

Sous chef | opla!Sanji x fem!Reader

word count: 2.1k

genre/tags: Sanji x reader; first-person pov; fluff; pining (but is it mutual??); angst; hurt/comfort; friends to lovers

warnings: mild ptsd; mild trauma

summary: A restless night at sea turns into one of revelations, as the reader finds that the depths of the ocean are much like a certain chef’s heart…

a/n: Hello opla girlies! First time fanfic writer here!!

I am ever the lurker on this website, but something inside me changed when I started watching One Piece, and now I’m down bad for this crew (specifically for the hot cook)

So I thought I’d give it a shot, write a bit of fanfic and see where it goes! I’ve finished the live action and currently watching the anime, so my interpretation of Sanji is quite mixed, however I tried to stay closer to opla!Sanji. I’ve also left this open ended cos I might write more (who knows hehehe)

Shoutout to @honnelander for inspiring me to write again ☺️ (please read her go fish! series if you haven’t!! It’s great!!)

𝘏𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘰𝘺, 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘨 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰!

(。･ω･｡)ﾉ♡

Sanji often stayed up late during those long nights at sea, prepping for the next day's meals, making notes of what had been used and taking stock of the ingredients that were left.

It was almost obsessive at times, desperate even.

He ignored everyone’s concern for him to just take it easy and go to sleep, even Nami’s, and refused to give us an explanation.

He would count every last bean, every last grain of rice or drop of water that he could, and he had tried many times but failed to make an accurate record (mostly because Luffy would lessen the supplies significantly).

I hadn’t really understood his habit, until one night, when the waves were particularly rough and I was disturbed from my sleep.

Usually, rough waters didn’t bother me too much, but I was already quite restless that night and had only truly been half asleep.

My mind was a blazing mess from all the thoughts that had been looping endlessly through it.

Thoughts of him.

I sat up on the futon. My hair draped in a tangled mess around my face and over my shoulders.

I looked across at Nami, her back facing towards me, breathing deeply as she slept.

I envied her ease.

I hauled myself out of the bed and straightened the silk nightgown I was wearing. I slipped on the woven shawl I had laid out over my blanket and made my way down the corridor, towards the kitchen.

The waves had picked up their brutality and began to batter the ship quite hard, so that it swayed violently from side to side.

Gripping the sides of the walls and trying to match the sway, I wondered how everyone could sleep so peacefully.

The ship moaned and croaked as it continued to sway.

I stumbled into the kitchen just as it crashed against the starboard side hard, pushing the ship port.

The force took me by surprise, causing me to lose my grip of the wall and my footing.

I tumbled through the doorway, and slammed hard against the stack of barrels in the corner.

The momentum of the ship turned once more. Lurching towards the right again, I slid off the barrel and slammed face first onto the ground.

“Ah shit!” I yelped. All traces of sleep had officially left me.

“Luffy, that better not be you,” came a brash voice from the darkness, “and if it is, you best be walking out that door right now.”

“Ack, Sanji?”

In the dull light, I saw the concerned face of the cook instantly pop around the counter.

“Y/n! Gods, are you alright?”

He moved swiftly to where I was laying and gently lifted me up.

“You're alright now, love. C’mon up. That’s it, easy”

He swung my arm around his neck and held my waist tightly as he led me to the bench seating on the other side of the kitchen counter.

Despite the daze I was in, I still felt my heart quicken, at his firm grip on my waist and at the ease with which he picked me up.

“Sanji, what are you doing up?” I whispered, not because I was trying to be quiet, but because the knock had left me completely winded.

He sat me down and wrapped my shawl around me tightly, rubbing my shoulders as he did, and kneeled down in front of me.

“Are you okay? Look at my fingers, how many do you see? Are you cut anywhere, y/n? Do you have a concussion? Do you want some water, tea? What do you need, I’ll get it for you, anything you nee-”

“Sanji,” I said, holding my hand firmly on his mouth to keep him quiet, “I’m alright.”

I squeezed his shoulder, as I saw a sigh of relief wash over his face. “You really got to stop treating me like some princess you know.”

“Madam, you are the loveliest person to ever grace this ship. I would hate it if I couldn’t bask in your beauty everyday.”

“You’re laying it on a bit thick, aren’t you?” But I could feel my stomach fluttering at his words.

He grinned, “madam, someone as lovely as you deserves to hear it said often.”

I shoved his shoulder. “Shut up!”

He laughed. He looked so soft in the light of the lantern.

“You didn’t answer my question by the way.”

“What question?” he asked, as he got up to sit next to me.

“Why are you awake?”

He turned his face away from me and shifted uneasily on the bench. “Why does it matter?”

“Sanji, why are you awake, really? What is it that you’re not telling us? You know I’ve lost track of how many times Luffy’s found you asleep in here because you’ve been up doing… well, whatever you do. What’s going on?”

He let out a deep sigh as he turned back around to face me, looking at me through the flop of blonde hair that covered half his face. He bit his lip hard and dropped his head, defeated it would seem.

The ship continued to sway and croak and groan, as the silence between us grew.

He looked small, afraid. I reached out to hold his hands and he took them eagerly, squeezing them tightly as he did.

“You all know about what happened to me and Zeff,” he said finally, “and I appreciate the kind words and empathy you’ve all given me, but you could never really understand what that was like, being out there. Waiting to die. The scorching, unrelenting sun in the day that made my skin flake off. The icy air of night that felt like daggers, prodding at my burnt flesh. Being hollowed out from the inside, from the hunger, until the numbness set in and I thought I’d melt into that shitty rock. Even being as careful as I was, as precise, I still didn’t have nearly enough food to survive, and it really was only by fate or luck, a real miracle actually, that we were rescued.

I guess I haven’t shook that feeling yet, that fear. It was easier to distract myself in the restaurant, you know, being surrounded by food and all, but here it’s different here. I-I just want be sure, I want to know that we’re good, at all times, because I don’t want any of you to go through what I did. It’s shit, yeah I know, but I’d rather not sleep then let any of you go through that.”

Again, the silence between us was palpable.

I felt like I’d been punched.

He breathed heavily, as if trying to catch his breath and I knew then that this was something he had kept buried deep within himself because the true nature of his fear was so horrific, so raw, who could ever understand it?

None of us had been out there with him, even though we would all do the same for each other.

But our sentiments were just words.

He had lived it.

The silence grew stifling.

I knew he would do anything to protect us from that fate.

“Sanji”

“You-you can’t tell the others. They don’t need to know, yeah? I’m happy as long as they’re fed with no complaints.”

“But Sanji-”

“Y/n, please don’t tell them.”

“Then why are you telling me?”

The mess of thoughts in my mind was growing.

He held my hands tighter and used them to pull himself towards me. His thumbs made circular motions on my palms.

I heard my heart pounding in my ears and I stupidly hoped he couldn’t hear it.

“Darling, I am a ball of dough in your hands. You can knead me and form me any way you’d like, and I’ll give you no resistance.”

“Pfft” I giggled and so did he.

At this, I felt like we were both at ease again.

I always admired his way of keeping things light.

“No, but, if you’d allow me, madam, to be serious,” he straightened up a bit then, “I suppose I was hoping that you’d find me in here. I was hoping that I could tell just you. You’ve got a way about you that everyone just finds trustworthy. I don’t know but there’s, there’s something about you...” He trailed off and laughed before he could finish, and I could see a faint blush of pink on his cheeks. “Sorry I-I ugh, I’m a bit sleep deprived. I’m just glad you’re here.”

I had never seen this side of him (or any side of him for that matter) though I knew it existed. Somewhere under the flirtatious, playboy persona he put out, I knew there was a genuine sweetness. I just wished I was more awake to really enjoy it.

Once the pain I was in wore off, my whole body felt heavy, like it was being pulled down with the full force of gravity, and the sway of the ship was less violent and more like the gentle rock of a cradle.

“You know, you don’t have to pretend with me.” I swept his bangs out of his eyes and kept my hand cupped around the side of his face. I hadn’t realised how blue his eyes were until now.

Even in the dull light, I could see every shade of blue there was swirling in them, like the ocean’s raging swell on a moonlit night. I saw the sleep in his eyes weighing him down too.

“You know this is the most words I’ve heard out of your mouth since I got here.”

He grinned sleepily, “well I’ve just been trying to find the right time to talk to you, my swan.”

I could feel my cheeks burn and I hoped he didn’t see the blush come over them.

“I didn’t think the right time would be 3am, me face planted and bruised in the kitchen, but here we are.”

“You are alright now, yeah?”

“Of course,” I scoffed, “I’m just sleepy. You look sleepy too.”

As if on cue, he yawned and leaned back on the bench.

“Yeah,” he said, “it’s super late. And Luffy wanted everyone to have a big breakfast tomorrow, you know with eggs, bacon, croissants, etc. Breakfast service is always the most important. But I just…” his voice trailed off again, but there was a hint of frustration this time.

“You just can’t sleep, like you cannot.”

“Yeah.”

“I get it,” I said, and I did, “the memories, they come back; more vividly, more real at night. It’s like it’s better to be awake than asleep. Like sleep causes you to relive the pain. Every moment, everything.”

“Y/n,” he said with concern in his voice, “what caused you pain, my love?”

My love.

Those words rang in my ears for some time, even now. Did he mean it?, I thought, maybe he feels the same?

Was all that flirting genuine or was he just being nice?

Was he just being Sanji?

It had been such a long, revealing night, but that stuck out to me and I couldn’t shake it.

He had been so open about his fears, not even the captain knew what he was telling me, I was sure of it.

So then, I kept thinking, why me?

If I didn’t mean something more, then why me?

While I was mulling all this over, I hadn’t noticed that I was leaning on his shoulder until he pulled me into a hug, wrapping his arms around me and holding me tightly, so that my face rested on his chest.

The slit in his poet shirt revealed his tanned skin underneath.

I boldly moved my hand up his chest and traced his freckles with my fingers.

He played with my hair.

Friends definitely didn’t do this.

“Let’s not talk about that now,” I whispered, “just close your eyes, okay? And Sanji?”

“Yes?”

“If you need a sous chef tomorrow morning, I’ll be there.”

I felt his soft laugh hum in his chest.

“Thank you, y/n. I’ll take you up on that.”

He buried his face in my hair as he continued to hug me and I felt his whole body relax.

In one night, the chef had shown me that there were more layers to this cake of a personality he had than I had fully anticipated, and all of them were deliciously sweet.

Delectable even.

And confusing.

As we slipped further into sleep, we had also unknowingly laid ourselves out on the bench, still tangled in each other's embrace, and sharing my shawl for warmth.

An embrace that was a little too close for friends.

— — — — —

“We’re just friends, Nami,” I hissed, trying to restrain myself from yelling in her ear, “there’s nothing there! He-we- we’re just friends! There are no feelings, we are JUST friends.”

She found us in the morning and woke me up, leaving Sanji still asleep.

I flapped around our room, growling out my protests as I did, but it was no use.

She just sat there.

Just sat there.

Arms folded and tapping her toes.

With a huge smirk plastered across her face.

“Yeah, I bet you are.”

#opla sanji #opla sanji x fem!reader #opla sanji x reader #opla sanji x y/n #sanji x reader #sanji x y/n #opla x reader #first person pov #vinsmoke sanji #sanji vinsmoke #sanji fanfic #sanji fanfiction #opla #one piece sanji #one piece #one piece fanfiction #one piece fanfic #actually down on my knees for this man 🙈🙇🏽‍♀️

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joshlmbrt · 6 months

Note

Also I was wondering if you could do King steve harrington falls in love with good girl innocent reader and he changes for the best once he starts dating her and just fluffy fluff

I don’t wanna lose you, hope it never ends. part one.

[ part two | part three ]

summary: robin’s ramblings of tammy thompson, king steve being . . . himself, you having a crush, movie nights with cherry coke & exaggerated conclusions from robin, and a toothrotting kiss candy, and dustin, and a call that never comes.

warnings: not gender specific, king!steve era, hopefully toothrotting fluff, one small mentions of death - really quick though, and maybe a smidge of angst at the end.

an: loved this request, and loved writing this! thank you again for requesting 😭🫶🏻 (might write a part two because i kind of see this going somewhere …. what do we think? 😛)

MONDAY.

“And she looked at me!” Robin squeals into your ear, your face scrunching up from the noise.

“Yeah, yes. That’s-That’s great, Robs.” You don’t mean to sound rude, but the ringing in your ear from your friend didn’t help the headache at all.

She pouts, crossing her arms. “What’s the matter? You don’t love me anymore?”

You send a teasing glance her way. “Trust me. You’d know if I didn’t,” She grins. “I do love you, but I’m just tired.” You shut your locker door, glancing over Robins shoulder.

“Great!” She places her hands on your shoulders, shaking you a bit. “But stop looking a Steve. You’re making me wanna gag.”

Your jaw drops. “How dare you accuse me of such a thing!”

Her face drops and her eyes droop a bit, giving you a ‘really?’ look. “Yeah, okay. I can practically see the heart eyes! Anyone can!”

“Oh, come on! I’m not looking at him!” Or his dreamy brown eyes, the blue sweater and levi’s that always seem to fit him perfectly, or the-

“You can deny all you want, but I know you,” She points at you, closing one eye. “And I know what you’re thinking.”

“I’m not thinking anything.” Quite literally because every time you seem to look at Steve, your mind goes totally blank.

“They broke up.”

“Who?” You feign confusion. You knew who.

She gives you the same look. “Steve and Nancy.”

You pout a bit, walking past Robin and she follows after you. “That’s too bad. They were cute.”

Robin rolls her eyes so far, you’re worried they’ll get stuck in the back of her head.

You walk past the smell of cashmere and Marlboro Reds smoke. A weirdly, sweet combination that you’d love for it to linger.

Your eyes glance towards Steve, quickly looking away once you realize he’s already looking.

Your cheeks flush and you tighten your grip on your books and you keep your head down, as always.

FRIDAY.

You slip into your chair, happy that the day has flew by and tonight is yours and Robins annual movie night.

On tonight: THE OUTSIDERS

Snacks: popcorn, cherry coke, and gummies.

The seat beside you scrapes against the floor and you wince at the sound, leaning over to grab your folder and pencil.

Before placing the items down, you pause.

There’s a folded up piece of paper on the desk in front of you.

Your eyes cut over to the left.

The seat is empty.

They glance towards the right.

And widened.

Steve Harrington - King of Hawkins - sitting next to you.

It was completely fine. You’re completely fine. There’s no way you were sweating right now.

Absolutely not.

Especially when he looks over at you, a smirk tugged at his lips as his eyes glance at the paper before quickly looking back at you, nodding slightly.

You force yourself to look away, placing your folder and pencil down finally, slowly, before picking up the paper.

You hoped you didn’t look too eager while opening it.

Call me.

And below was his number. You quickly look back over at him and he nods once again. You nod softly, folding the paper back and placing it into your bag.

You squeal internally.

FRIDAY NIGHT.

“So, tomorrow?” You twirl the cord around your finger.

You were the embodiment of a lovesick teenager, legs folded together at the ankles, swinging back and forth, giggling as you blush and look down at your sheets.

Robin lifts her brows as she stops by your door, watching you.

Lovesick teenager. I knew it.

You quickly look up, smiling at her widely.

“Yeah, I’ll pick you up. 6:30?”

“That sounds good. I’ll see then,” You pause before looking away from Robin. “Goodnight, Steve.”

You then hang up, placing your phone over to the side.

You slowly sit up, avoiding Robin’s ‘I told you so’ look.

“I-”

You finish for her. “Told you so,” You lie back onto your bed, feeling it dip under Robin’s weight as she joins your side after dropping her bag off in the corner of your room. “But hey, what was I supposed to do? Pass up the offer to go on a date with Steve?”

She gives you a look. “Personally, I would. But we are different.”

You roll your eyes, nudging her shoulder with yours. “If it doesn’t go well, no more Steve.”

“Promise? Every time you look at him I wanna throw myself off of a building.”

You sit up, huffing at her - always one to be dramatic. “Yes. I promise. Now come on, Patrick Sawyze is in my VCR waiting for us.”

She cackles at that, standing up after kicking off her converse. “You’re so dramatic.

SATURDAY.

“What if you guys get married and run off and you leave me here?” Robin asks suddenly.

You almost burn yourself with your hot iron. You place it down. “You can’t just say stuff like that out of the blue while i’m holding a hot iron close to my face,” You turn to look at the girl who was laying on your bed, flipping pages of magazines slowly.

She looked sad.

You frown a bit, standing from your vanity chair and walk over to her, laying beside her on your stomach and you nudge her shoulder softly.

“Hey, Robs,” You say softly. “I know you’re worried about not finding anyone. . . But I promise you, you will,” She looks up at you now. “We’re teenagers for crying out loud! I’m doing this so I can go on a date.”

“And because you like Steve.” She points out.

You rub your lips together. “And because I like Steve,” You repeat her words. “But you will find someone, okay? You’re a great person with a wonderful personality. Anyone would be lucky to have you.” You pat her hand.

She smiles and leans her head on your shoulder, her vanilla shampoo invades your nose.

“And even if we did run off, I definitely wouldn’t forget you. You’d be coming with us.” You laugh softly.

She giggles a bit at that, shaking her head. You lift from your bed, patting her head softly before continuing getting ready.

“You’re my best friend, you know that right?” She asks.

You smile. “You’re my best friend too.”

SATURDAY NIGHT, 6:30.

A knock makes you almost jump out of your skin. Robin was long gone, wanting to go home before any mushy stuff happened - you wanted to roll your eyes at her.

Your parents definitely wouldn’t be knocking.

So that means. . . it could only be one person.

You stand from the couch, smoothing out your clothes before walking towards the door and opening it.

Steve Harrington in all his Levi glory.

And pretty flowers.

“You look great.” He smiles softly. He then holds the flowers out for you. You grab them from his hand.

“Thank you,” You smile. “You do too. I’ll put these in some water before we go. You can come in if you’d like.”

He nods, stepping into the home, but not allowing himself to go any further.

You step into the kitchen, moving as quick as you could, before placing them in the middle of the counter.

“Alright,” You step out into the living room. “I’m ready.”

He nods, opening the door for you, allowing you to go first.

And the rest of the night, he was a real gentleman.

Opening doors for you, holding your hand, and paying for the snacks at the Drive-in, keeping a respectful distance unless you had moved closer.

The walk to your front door made you feel sad that it was over, but happy that it happened.

“I had fun.” Steve nods, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he looks at you.

You smile, eyes crinkling at the sides. “Yeah, me too,” You tuck some hair behind your ear. “We should. . . We should do this again.”

“Yeah,” He nods. There was a piece of hair that had landed against his forehead. You wanted to push it away. “We should.”

He steps closer.

Your breath hitches in your throat, heart speeding up.

“I’ll call you.”

Your eyes brighten up at the words. “Really?”

“Mhm.” His breath smelt like cherries and toothrotting sugar.

Your eyes track his movements. The leaning in, the fluttering of his eyes, and his tongue peeking out to wet his lips.

Your eyes close, waiting. Waiting. Waiting.

And a peck on the cheek is what you’re met with.

Your eyes quickly open and you watch as he pulls back, a small smile on his face.

“Goodnight.” He hums softly, walking off.

You stand there, baffled. “G-goodnight.” You call after him.

He turns to glance back at you, before shaking his head a bit, getting into his car.

SUNDAY AFTERNOON.

“Maybe he died.” Robin says nonchalantly.

You gasp. “Robs!”

“What?!”

“Don’t. . . Don’t say that!”

“Oh, come on. I didn’t mean that in a bad way! Accidents happen all the time! You know, about-”

“Okay, okay. I gotta go, Dustin’s wants me to play this game. Bye, Robs. I’ll call you later.” You quickly hang up, not wanting to hear the possibility of Steve’s death being accidental.

Dustin glances up at you. “Finally!”

You shake your head, laughing softly. “Sorry, Dusty. It’s just you and I now! Okay. What’s the rules?”

Dustin grins, his eyes lighting up.

The poor boy didn’t even realize you weren’t listening, just nodding along to whatever he was saying, eyes glancing back at the phone.

Waiting for the call that would never come.

thank you for reading! likes, comments, reblogs, and feedback is always welcomed!

#steve harrington x reader #stranger things one shots #steve harrington x fem #steve harrington x you

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sallowsunshine · 1 year

Note

Sebastian x F! hufflepuff where he starts getting more jealous of her and ominis being closer, as he goes down the path of the dark arts gets a bit obsessive about it!! I just love angst and fluff so if it could also have a happy ending MSNSKDB

Got a little carried away with this one. I forgot to include Hufflepuff specifically, so can be read as any house. Also, not a happy ending, but definitely a hopeful ending. Contains spoilers for Sebastian's quests.

“Perhaps I should have a chat with Ominis,” you say to Sebastian. The two of you were outside the Slytherin common room, where Sebastian had been hoping Ominis would help him open up the Scriptorium.

“You?” Sebastian laughs. “Well I suppose it’s worth a try, but don’t get your hopes up. Ominis is annoyingly stubborn.”

You gesture Sebastian over after talking with Ominis, appealing to a more sympathetic view point that exploring the Scriptorium and finding out what happened to his aunt would honor her memory.

“Now you’ll share? You wouldn’t tell me when I practically begged.” Sebastian exclaimed.

“It wasn’t you who told me what I needed to hear.” Ominis replied.

Their first obstacle is a locked door, and Ominis knows how to get through. He’s ready to turn back, but Sebastian isn’t. You’re stuck in the middle, nervous at what lies ahead.

“Believe me, I am having thoughts- but I’m still convinced we should go ahead.” you say after Ominis expresses his wish that you’re having second thoughts.

The door opens to whatever he says in Parseltongue. “It worked! Ominis, you possess a rare ability indeed!” your excitement washes over into your voice.

Sebastian crosses his arms. “Between the two of you, I’m starting to feel left out.”

“Between the two of us?” Ominis raises his eyebrows.

“I- never mind.” Sebastian shakes his head.

You assume he’s referring to your ability to see ancient magic, but you wonder if there’s more behind his comment.

The three of you are trapped. Ominis is at the other end, pacing back and forth, his head in his hands. “I knew I shouldn’t have listened to either of you!”

Sebastian pulls you to the side, “I know what to do. We need to cast crucio. Ominis knows how. You seem to be in Ominis’ favor- will you ask him about this?”

“I cannot ask this of him. I don’t understand how you can even think about asking him to do this. Are you sure you don’t know how to cast it?” You’re scared. This is more than you bargained for. This is more than what you wanted. No answers were worth ruining a friendship like this. No answers were worth losing their lives for.

“You would rather die, than cast a curse, Ominis?” Sebastian calls out to him. “I think I know how. I can either teach you, or I can cast it on you.” he says to you.

“If you cast Crucio, you will regret it forever,” Ominis calls back.

“I don’t want to learn the Cruciatus Curse, so you must cast it on me.” You’re shaking your head.

“Very well. I shan’t forget this.” Sebastian takes his wand out. “Ready?”

You can’t even reply, your body is frozen in fear.

“Crucio”

Instantly, you’re down on the ground, screaming. White-hot pain laces its way down your body through to your bones. As quick as it starts, it’s over. But you body still feels the toll. You can’t even think of getting up, so you curl in on yourself.

“You alright?” Sebastian moves to help you.

You flinch back and whimper, “Please. Don’t”

“Are you alright?” Ominis calls out. He’s found his way near you, and has his hand extended out to you.

You take it, and a flash of hurt crosses Sebastian’s face. “That pain. It was excrutiating, but I’ll survive. Let’s keep moving.” your entire body feels weak and you have to lean on Ominis.

“I’m sorry Ominis, I don’t think I can stand on my own right now.” you groan.

“Let me help-” Sebastian tries.

“You’ve done enough, Sebastian.”

“-Not all goblins”

“Not all goblins what? Have you forgotten Feldcroft? Have you forgotten the mines we just went through?” Sebastian sneers.

“No, I haven’t forgotten, but you’re not listening to me!” you try to reason with him.

“Why would I listen to someone so ignorant?”

“Please, stop it, Sebastian. You’re don’t know what you’re saying.” you shake your head. “You’re being cruel. Ominis-”

“Unbelievable.” without another word, Sebastian storms away.

You didn’t think things would go this far. Sebastian was going to explore the catacombs with or without you and you had promised Ominis you’d keep him out of trouble. The relic had been found, and the desire to help Anne had begun to turn Sebastian power-hungry. He was becoming increasingly irritable and snappy. You were a bit relieved when Ominis showed up in the catacombs.

“You cannot let him leave with the relic.” Ominis pleaded.

“There’s no stopping him, I’m afraid. I’ve already tried to reason with him.”

You continue to explain to him how this will be the last time. No more after this. If Sebastian continues, you won’t- can’t associate yourself with him anymore.

“Fine. Fine, I’ll let you pass. You have to help him, though. Don’t let it go any further.” Ominis pleads.

You return to Sebastian. “What is it? I haven’t changed my mind.”

“Ominis has, let’s go.”

“What? Ominis? What happened back there?” Sebastian questions suspiciously.

“Ominis and I found a compromise,” you answer.

Sebastian pulls you around to face him. “Ominis simply needs a moment with you and he’ll change his mind. Is that it?”

“You’ve started to go too far, Sebastian. Everytime you say this will be the last time. But it never is. You are lying to Ominis and me, and you are lying to yourself. I understand you’re doing this for Anne, but this wouldn’t be what she wants. The answer does not lie within the dark arts. Please stop now, while you still can.”

“Oh, I see. You and Ominis have both turned against me. I knew there was something between you two. And don’t you dare use Anne against me. I refuse to give up on her.” Sebastian’s voice rises.

“Between Ominis and me?” you scoff. “The only thing between us is our desire to keep you from doing something you’ll regret. We’re begging you, I am begging you to please stop this.”

“You’re lying. I see the way you two are together, the way you talk about me behind my back. I saw the fear in your eyes when I tried to help you in the Scriptorium. You’re scared of me. You’re scared of the power the Unforgivables can grant you.” You stop in your tracks and turn to him.

“Sebastian, you’re seeing things that aren’t there. But you are right, I’m scared. Not of you, but of what you are becoming. You are not the boy I first met in Defense Against the Dark Arts. You rarely smile anymore, and you rarely laugh. You’re letting this sick obsession with finding a cure consume you. It’s going to tear you apart. Tear us apart.”

“Ominis, we’ve lost him. I’ve tried to defend his actions but I just can’t anymore.”

The two of you are in the Undercroft. You hadn’t spoken to Sebastian since he left the catacombs with the relic.

“We cannot give up on him. He needs us.” Ominis’ hand finds your shoulder and you turn and embrace him, wrapping your hands around his waist.

“I don’t want to do this anymore. I want to help him, but he’s making it impossible.” The tears begin to slip down your cheeks.

Neither of you hears the gate to the Undercroft opening. “I knew it!” Sebastian’s voice echoes.

You and Ominis startle apart.

“I knew there was something going on between you two.”

“Sebastian! You are looking for something that is not there” Ominis tries to reason with him.

“Please, Sebastian. There is nothing between Ominis and me. It’s you I want to be with!”

Silence. You can’t breathe.

“I - I didn’t mean to say that.” You don’t know what else to say.

Silence.

“But I cannot keep watching you do this to yourself. You say we should not be afraid of the dark arts, but it has begun to consume you. I will not be a part of this any longer.”

Sebastian’s face falls. “But- I need you. I need both of you. I can’t do this without you.” He pleads.

“This time, we will give you one more chance. You will not use that artifact. You will not use the dark arts. Or we will no longer be around to help you.” Ominis ordered.

“I- I will do my best to make it up to you. To the both of you.” Sebastian looks to you. “I- I think we need to talk.”

#sebastian sallow x mc #sebastian sallow x you #sebastian sallow #sebastian sallow x reader #hogwarts legacy #prompt request #fic #my writing

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stomach-bugg09 · 1 year

Note

hi this is my first time requesting🫶🏼🫶🏼

how about reader getting taken by the sky people and just angst and fluff with neteyam trying to get her back from them

summary: [y/n] is with lo’ak, kiri, spider, and tuk when the avatars first attack. after saving the life of tuk, [y/n] is taken by quaritch along with the human boy, allowing an adventure that she never could have imagined. what happens when she is finally reunited with her love?

a/n: oh my goodness , this has been sitting in my inbox for what seems like a billion years—i am so so sorry for taking this long to get to it. i hope you enjoy !! it’s a little bit of angst in the beginning , but the original atwow plot has been changed because i cannot afford anymore tears over neteyam’s death. also , i literally do not remember how this scene goes , so if it’s inaccurate , whoopsies !! feedback + reblogs are always apprecaited !!

tags: @pinkhotdogsfr @wxnderingthoughts @liyahsocorro @bonnibuckets @itssiaaax @grierpilots @fleurbeass @hjkshshjkhklhkl

warnings: fighting , blood , guns , spider being a good person , being friends with spider , mentions of death

words: 2.4k

he is my home

[y/n] often wonders to herself, how long has it been? she’s seen the vast world of pandora, more of it than she could ever have imagined, and yet she cannot find any happiness within herself for the journey. the only thing she can focus on is whether or not the sully family is okay, specifically recalling the longing face of her love before she was grabbed by one of the avatars.

it’d been so long, she questioned whether or not the face that she remembered, the face that she dreamed about, was truly him. what details was she missing? was that truly his smile?

at first, she had hope. maybe she would be able to fact check sooner rather than later. but, she eventually got to a point where all faith dissipated. all she had was the desire of just being released from the hold of the avatars.

[y/n] could still feel the way her body trembled when she was first brought to the base. where was she? where was neteyam?

[y/n] could still feel the way her head spun and her stomach twisted as they tortured her for information. “ke omum oel teyngta,” she screamed. over and over again.

she owed her life to spider, as much as it pained her to say. just months ago, she would’ve hated the way she now adored the human boy. she used to hate him—the way that he acted like he was one of them. and now, he became the reason that she still breathed.

[y/n] was not an idiot. she knew that quaritch wanted to kill her once she was determined useless. but, spider socorro had leverage as his son, claiming that he would only help his father if and only if they kept [y/n] alive and allow her to accompany them.

despite their agreement, spider did not make it easy when attempting to help the humans. [y/n] followed along blindly, silent at all times. the only time she showed any sign of emotion was when they returned to the forest for the avatars’ ikrans.

spider often acted as a translator between the parties, [y/n] having not grown up knowing the sky-people language. when they demanded directions, spider was the one to relay that [y/n] had no idea, although they got to a point that each avatar was very familiar with the na’vi words, “ke omum oel teyngta” because of how often she said it.

now, [y/n] could not believe where she stood.

the ship beneath her feet rocked back and forth, the motion making her stomach sick. she clutched the rail desperately, stomach lurching as she held her head over the edge just in case.

spider grimaced. “are you okay?” he asked, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

“never been better.” [y/n]’s tone was dark, dry.

it only caused him to swallow in defeat, her new changed personality directly opposing the type of person that she used to be. he recalled the way her eyes lit up at the nature of eywa, the way her laugh echoed across a room, the way she smiled when she was with neteyam. the memories were harsh, and they stung more than anything. but, they also kept spider motivated to save [y/n], to get her back to neteyam wherever he may be.

[y/n] felt particularly wounded thanks to the events of the past week. the gruesome choices that the rda kept making… it was sickening. her stomach churned even more as she recalled the way the sea na’vi screamed as fire lit their homes. the way they looked at her, eyes desperate to help protect their families.

[y/n] cried, the avatars holding both her and spider back. she had never wanted to kill the socorro boy’s father more, but she could not. she no longer had any sense of advantage, especially not in a territory that she was unfamiliar with.

not only did they torture innocent na’vi, but they terrorized the entire sea. tears pricked her eyes once she remembered the image of the dead tulkun and her calf floating in the water, blood swirling with each wave.

and now she stood there, helpless in the middle of the sea. the only thing roaming her head were the questions, are the sullys here? are they alive? are they safe?

“do you think they’re on one of the islands?” she found herself asking spider after a few beats of silence, her voice hushed.

the human boy swallowed, shaking his head. “i guess we technically have no way of knowing, but based on the way that quaritch is so adamant…” he trailed, inhaling slowly. the silence spoke for itself.

“i wish we could warn them.” her voice was rough, clearly not used to speaking based on her depressed silence for the past few months.

spider backed away from the rail, hands going to his face in order to adjust his mask. “if there was a way…” he only shook his head.

“i know.”

it was the yelling of the sky-people that brought the two adolescents back to reality. [y/n]’s eyes wandered the ship, watching as humans run across the deck. their voices carried in the wind, another language ripped from their throats.

“what are they saying?” [y/n] demanded, falling back from the rail. “what is happening?” spider’s heart panged at the concern held in the na’vi’s eyes.

“i—” he stuttered, regaining his balance as the ship lurched—”i don’t know.”

both of them cried out in rage as avatar hands gripped them by the shoulders, immobilizing them from running. “you’re coming with us.”

although [y/n] didn’t understand, she was smart enough to recognize that tone, and that tone meant obey. that was the tone she’d been dealing with for months. obey or die.

[y/n] cried out as the avatar gripped her braid, tears filling her eyes at the sharp pain. her hands immediately attempted to go to his wrist, but another avatar was quick to grab her arms and shackle them behind her back.

“spider!” she yelled, unable to see the boy.

“i am here!” relief flooded her body. “i am right behind you, just—” he grunted—”just keep moving.”

unfortunately, she had to do just that. there was nothing that she could do after months of lacking food, lacking water, and lacking training to fight them off. not when they held guns in their hands.

a grunt left [y/n]’s throat as she was shoved into the room with humans. there was a mass amount of colorful buttons, glass windows allowing her to see out onto the water. she gasped at the impact that shocks her back when she was shoved into some sort of desk.

she immediately crumpled, unable to stay upright any longer. weakly, she lifted her head just in time to watch spider receive the same treatment.

the boy was quick to help her up, allowing her lean against him as she adjusted her body to the new bruise that was forming in the middle of her back. she groaned at the pain, but it was nothing she hadn’t dealt with before.

as she looks around at their surroundings, eyes gauging new exits, entrances, weaknesses, and flaws, her visual scan is cut short by the view outside the window. “spider.”

"what?” he panicked at her low tone.

“look.” his eyes followed her hand, only to be greeted with the sight of a fleet of na’vi. they arrived in all different forms, each riding their own creature through the waters except for a familiar female that reigned the skies.

“no way,” he muttered, jaw dropping just the slightest.

he took a step forward, but at the motion, every human went rigid, guns raised. he raised his eyebrows at that, arms going up in mock defense. “just taking a look, folks.” his voice was quiet and sarcastic, going on his toes to take a peek.

“is that..?” [y/n] trailed, now recognizing three familiar figures that are cuffed to the rail that they’d been standing by just minutes before.

“aw, shit.”

it didn’t take long for the scene to escalate. panic rose and fell in [y/n]’s chest as she watched jake sully nearly sacrifice himself, but the beautiful sight of a tulkun leads hope to flood her chest.

it was the attack of the creature that sent everything skyrocketing. while the na’vi of the sea attacked the ship, [y/n] and spider took it as a chance to attack from the inside out.

despite being in bonds, [y/n] could still recall enough training to beat the worst of the soldiers. afterall, they had all the important fighters trying to hold down the fort outside.

it was thanks to spider and his creative use of a fire extinguisher as a weapon that they were free of their captivity inside the room. as the tulkun and na’vi attack from outside, pride panged in [y/n]’s soul that she and spider were successful in attacking from the inside.

once they defeated the last human manning the controls, [y/n] stood there in silence, trying to catch her breath. her arms hung heavy, still tied together. blood leaked from a small wound on her forehead, but she had more of their opponents’ blood that crusted on her fists.

spider and her immediately repositioned themselves defensively at the sound of someone bursting through the door.

it is then that [y/n]’s heart stopped.

“neteyam?”

she could not breath, she could not think. suddenly, she had not a single clue of what was laying outside of their bubble. all she saw was him. for the first time in months, she felt at home again.

she barely recognized as he ran to her, his arms warm as they embraced her figure. the only thing she could remember was the way that she cried into his shoulder. “oh, neteyam.”

neteyam surveyed her body. she was thinner, paler. blood dripped from her forehead, and her wrists were quite rough from rubbing against her shackles. his eyes widened at the sight of the blood that covered her hands.

"it is not mine,” she relayed, voice soft. [y/n] felt his hands holding hers, softly turning them over, but she was not watching that. her eyes would not leave his beautiful face. not after the time it took to see him again.

he laughed. “oh, trust me. i can tell.”

it was lo’ak’s groan that brought them back to reality. “look, i totally understand how this is a really big moment and all, but if we don’t move now, we’ll all die, and you’ll have to finish your reunion in the afterlife.”

“hello to you too, lo’ak.”

they definitely could have made a better plan. you know, a plan that wouldn’t have risked their lives multiple times. but, that was way out of their style! if there was one constant when it came to the sully boys, it was that they were really good at winging it and hoping for the best.

[y/n] felt much better, much freer, now that her hands weren’t contained by a pair of handcuffs. she also felt much better as her fingers did not once leave neteyam’s. they were intertwined for as long as they ran across the deck, not even letting him go when he took the gun from lo’ak. he assured her that he could use his other hand perfectly fine.

she trailed behind him as they sprinted, the exit in sight. [y/n]’s eyes lit up at the image of the water they were about to dive into, longing for freedom from the rda. she could feel spider had the same emotions, especially considering he still had yet to reunite with kiri.

but, of course, despite their very dramatic exit, there would always be flaws. and this one, of course, was life threatening.

the group of kids were on the final sprint, the only goal in mind being to escape. there was nothing to hide behind, nothing to save themselves. oh, no. they were praying to eywa that they would make it out alive.

it was when she saw him, the familiar avatar of wainfleet, and the way he aimed his gun at them, that her heart jumped to her throat. she let every instinct kick in, her feet leaving the ground as she launched herself into neteyam. the couple stumbled behind some sort of metal container.

a gasp left her throat when a bullet pierced the wall right where neteyam would have been if he kept running. the sully boy’s eyes were wide, a prayer to eywa leaving his lips as he watched spider and lo’ak dive into the water where they’d originally been planning.

while neteyam was wrapped up in the problem, [y/n] did not have time to think. instead, she stopped thinking and let her hands work for themselves.

that was the moment she blacked out. neteyam told her that she’d grabbed a stray gun laying on the ground, told her that she’d merely peeked her eyes out before aiming and shooting, told her that she shot him right in the hole of his armor. she was still unsure whether or not she believed him.

[y/n] could only clearly remember the way she stared at the dead avatar, gun warm in her hands. she was wordless, her breathing heavy as she inhaled and exhaled. the loud sound of the gunshot still rung in her ears, neteyam’s words sounding like muffles of noise.

it was only his hand around her wrist that brought her attention back. she swallowed as he pointed to the water, and she only nodded.

the two dove through together, the shocking chill of the salty sea causing her to nearly choke on the water. she sputtered as she resurfaced.

“[y/n]!” neteyam yelled, her ears finally regulating themselves again. “[y/n]!”

she turned, looking at her love. her love. “neteyam!” she swam quickly, finally feeling his embrace once again, although they quickly pulled themselves onto a hard surface at the newfound difficulty of reuniting in water.

before another word could be exchanged, the two kissed. they kissed with more passion than any other kiss before, so much longing and sadness built up. so much worry. tears pricked [y/n]’s eyes.

when they broke apart, she held the back of his head. “neteyam, how i have missed you.”

“i am so happy that you’re alive.” she laughed at his words, leaning her forehead against his chest. “and i am never leaving you again.”

“oh, i wouldn’t dream of it.”

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