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cy-cyborg · 2 months

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The Jaws Effect and what it means for media representation

The Jaws Effect is the name of a phenomenon that described the panic and fear that sprang up around sharks, fuelled by Steven Spielberg's movie, Jaws. While the fear of sharks and other marine predators had always been a thing, Jaws launched the fear of sharks, and Great White Sharks in particular, to new (and mostly unfounded) heights. Most people will never encounter a real-life shark and so their only knowledge about the creatures come from movies and other forms of entertainment. Entertainment that largely portrayed them as mindless, unfeeling killing machines. After Jaws, sharks became a staple in the creature-feature genre of movies, which only perpetuated the idea of sharks as dangerous monsters even further, reigniting and reconfirming the beliefs the public held about them in the process. These ideas about sharks are, of course, not true, but the misconception and fear has had a real, observable impacts on shark populations, shark conservation efforts and even laws and legislations surrounding sharks and shark conservation around the world.

Ok but Cy, this is a blog about disability and disabled representation, what do sharks have to do with anything you talk about? Well, Because The Jaws Effect is just one of many examples that shows how massive of an impact representation in the media can have, for better or for worse, especially when talking about subjects the public generally knows very little about.

This conversation is not unique to disability representation, nearly every person I've seen who's talked about how to write and design characters from any minority brings it up eventually, but the media we consume, the movies we watch, the books we read can all have big impacts on people's perceptions on those topics. When talking about disability specifically, it's an unfortunate reality that not many people know all that much about us, and so, much like sharks, for many, their only real exposure to disabled people is through the media they consume.

If you don't know anyone in a wheelchair, and your only knowledge of life as a wheelchair user comes from books and movies like Me Before You, of course you're going to (spoiler) come away thinking that life in a wheelchair is horrible and death is better than living like that. If you don't know any DID Systems and your only exposure to a condition like that is through movies like Split (and honestly, a number of other horror movies and crime shows) of course you'll think people with DID are unstable monsters who could become violent any moment. If your only exposure to autistic people is Music, then it's not shocking that you might think Autistic people are "trapped in their own minds," completely unaware of the world around them and lacking any kind of agency. As much as I'd like to be able to say these are "just movies" or "just books," and that if we don't like them, we can just not watch them, they all had an impact on the real world and real people's perceptions of the disabilities they depicted, as do the many, many smaller examples of bad representation.

This is why I personally spend so much time focused on the portrayal of disability in the media, why so much of my content is focused on creating resources for creators to represent us better, and why I think writers, artists and other types of creators should care about the representation they include.

Unfortunately, people believing misinformation and stereotypes, while annoying, isn't the worst of the impacts bad rep can have. If a stereotype is prevalent enough, and enough people believe it, it can both put us in harms way and cause us to loose access to things we desperately need and things designed to help us. One really common example of this is when movies and TV shows show a character getting up out of their wheelchair, and use this as proof that the person is faking being disabled. However, in reality, there are many disabilities that might mean someone has to use a wheelchair, even if they can still walk a little bit or stand up. The stereotype of someone standing up from their chair being a fake, especially when it's reinforced over and over again in the media, leads non-disabled people to believe that anyone who stands up from their wheelchair is faking, and results in a lot of real disabled people being harassed and denied things like access to disabled parking, toilets and other accessible spaces. There were even a few cases of people reporting those they see get out of their wheelchairs to Centrelink (The Australian "welfare" department, for those not familiar) as frauds, and while these investigations don't usually go far before someone realises what's happened, it has, on occasion, resulted in people loosing the income they depend on to survive, even temporarily.

But the impact of representation, of course, can go both ways.

I was in high school when the first How To Train Your Dragon movie came out, and at the time, I didn't really like people being able to see that I was a leg amputee because I was sick of kids in particular staring, pointing at me, asking their parents "what's wrong with them?" or asking me directly, "what's wrong with your legs?". I wore long skirts and big, bulky tracksuit pants to keep my legs covered, something that became dangerous in the hot Australian summer, but I didn't care.

But the impact of How to Train Your Dragon came in two ways. The first, was that it was one of the first times I'd seen an amputee (or rather, multiple amputees) who didn't keep their prosthetics covered or hidden, and it gave me the little boost in confidence I needed to do that myself and wear clothing that was more comfortable and functional. And second, the comments from children changed, albeit slightly, but enough that it was noticeable. The questions and comments went from "what's wrong with you?" to "oh cool, your legs are like Hiccup's!" I even had one little girl ask me once if I had a pet night fury. They went from being scared of me and my legs, or at the very least concerned for me, to genuinely curious and impressed. While reactions like that did become less and less common over time, they didn't fully go away either. Even today, I occasionally get young kids asking me why I have legs like hiccup. A friend of mine who was born with one arm shorter than the other and without fingers on that side had a similar experience with the movie Finding Nemo. Her disability was a bit more complex than what I described here, and she always found it hard to explain "what happened" to small children, however, after Finding Nemo came out, she was able to simply tell kids "this is my lucky fin, like what nemo has!" and that was enough to take her from someone "scary" to these kids to someone like their favourite characters.

Of course, it's much easier to see the impact positive representation can have on people's perceptions when we're talking about kids media, but it's not exclusive to it either.

When it comes to a minority like the disabled community who are so thoroughly misunderstood by the wider public, misinformation can and does spread easily. What people see and read in the media they consume plays a big roll in how people perceive the real people attached to the stereotypes. We often hear people say "Fiction imitates life" but the reverse can and often is also true, life can imitate and be influenced by fiction, and those of us creating should be mindful of this, especially when we're talking about a group of vulnerable people.

[Thumbnail ID: An illustration of a Great White Shark swimming near the rocky bottom of the ocean, surrounded by silver fish. In the bottom left corner of the image is "The Jaws Effect and what it means for media representation" in big, white bubble text. /End ID]

#Writing disability with Cy Cyborg #Disability 101 #Long Post #Disability #Disabled #Disability Representation #Writing Disability #Writing #Writeblr #Authors #Creators #Writing Advice #Disabled Characters #Disability History #On Writing #Disability in Media

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percheduphere · 6 months

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Okay. First post trying to use gifs properly. I've switched out improper gifs for these type for my last 3-4 posts. Gonna work on some more corrections tomorrow when I have time. Please let me know if I'm misstepping anywhere. Thanks for your patience! That said...

LET'S TALK ABOUT SYLVIE💕, INTERSECTIONAL FEMINISM (SYLVIE & LOKI)✊🏽, AND QUEER REPRESENTATION (LOKIUS)🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️!

SYLVIE

I'm rooting for Lokius, AND I also love how much Sylvie has forged a life for herself in S2. A lot of her development is implied, so I think it's worth looking at her growth outside the context of Loki himself: She found a job, locals know her by name, she has friends and acquaintances, she has hobbies!

People call her by name in her timeline on 4 occasions:

1. When the McDonald's shift manager (John) checks in on her after work. See the kid with the tie in the image below. I couldn't find any gifs of him visiting Sylvie at her truck. She asked him if his mom was gonna pick him up to make sure he was gonna be okay late at night. 🥹

2. When a customer picks up their McDonald's order and thanks her (cheerfully). Also note how many employee stars she had on her badge! Queen.

3. Lyle at the record store. They seem like really good friends, and I got the "beginnings of an attraction" vibe between the two of them. Unfortunately, the gifs below are the only ones I could find of him and I'm still searching for the source. His interaction with Sylvie before spaghetti-trauma was so sincere. He could tell she was down and offered her Velvet Underground. Come on, that's a solid move.

4. Eric at the bar, who comments 2 shots of bourbon is a good choice. Let me tell you, finding a gif of Eric was like finding a needle in a haystack, but here he is leaning close to Sylvie. Thank you, @zehiiro!

I tried to find more gifs of all the people Sylvie has in her life but couldn't find any, which is a darn shame because there are so many subtle cues she's built a support system on her own and she's thriving.

She's a regular at many places in her timeline, and when people greet her, they do so with a smile. She loves music, a hard drink, and punk fashion.

When she engages with Loki, she may come across as cold, but I honestly think she's being firm with her boundaries and true to her beliefs. The TVA threatened her life for centuries. I don't doubt setting foot in the building is traumatic for her, which may explain why she was more harsh than usually in S2E4. Her psychological defenses were all on overdrive. Yet when Sylvie's in her own timeline, far away from the TVA, she can be her real self. Turns out, her real self is pretty well-liked! (I'll talk about how this is mirrored in Loki soon).

INTERSECTIONAL FEMINISM

Sylvie's an unapologetically "selfish" woman who knows what she wants, wants it on her own, is doing it on her own, and isn't afraid to put her foot down when it comes to her personal boundaries. We should be applauding all of that!

This is exactly the kind of female representation we need, but the show did Sylvie a disservice in S1 by coming at her character as a love interest first (look at all the media promos classifying her as such) instead of more thoughtfully showing how badly she has been affected by the TVA and planting what her desires are throughout. If they had done this with more intention and finesse, her position in S2 wouldn't come off as completely irresponsible.

As a result of this apparent marketing and pre-production development decision, her perception as a character (by both lokius and sylki shippers) is muddled by the question of her relationship status with Loki. This truly isn't fair, most especially to Sophia Di Martino.

Of course, Sylvie isn't perfect. No well-written character should be. I just think she's cooler than she gets credit for precisely because her character arc doesn't require the fulfillment of a romance. She will be fine whether or not she ends up with Loki. It's very feminist!

Loki, in turn, found safety, belonging, and love at the TVA. All the things that are the complete opposite of Sylvie's lived experience. I often see fans complaining about how Loki is ooc in his own series.

The thing is, and Loki admits this himself: it's all part of an illusion.

This illusion started far before the first Thor movie. He comes from a hyper-masculine (dare I say toxic-masculine) warrior society. His true nature doesn't conform with this, so he has to overcompensate with some (genuinely awesome) bad assery.

BUT he doesn't like it.

As a comparison to a far lesser but more relatable degree: imagine putting on a customer service persona 24/7. UGH. It's just not sustainable without becoming increasingly angry and bitter, which is what Sacred Timeline Loki becomes. Mobius gets ahead of this.

In the series, Loki can finally TURN OFF that persona, and TURN IT ON again when it's needed (and fun!).

He also now has the freedom to be silly, expressive, and magical (unapologetically queer!) without anyone making fun of him for it.

The end result is a much calmer, happier, likable person (like Sylvie in her timeline, his defenses are no longer on overdrive!). Who shows him this is possible?

Here's the receipt:

QUEER REPRESENTATION

Sociopoliticaly, Loki and Mobius come from a different angle. A lot of men (cis, fluid, trans, or otherwise) struggle with the social expectation of burying feelings and never ever showing vulnerability, especially to another men. Now, some might argue that shipping men together perpetuates this construct. There's some truth to this, but only through the lens that it is shameful to be gay. In order to get to a point in society where there's no shame in being mistaken as gay (or queer, generally) when being affectionate with another man, there must be continuous positive representation of homosexual relationships in which the characters are not stereotypes. Loki and Mobius are exactly this, especially Mobius.

Whereas Loki, on Asgard, represents the openly queer oppressed (i.e. magic and cunning, qualities historically tied to witches or "immoral women" instead of brute strength), Mobius can represent the closeted repressed.

In S1, Mobius was much more uptight, rule-abiding, and just shy of holier-than-thou. The power structure in which he existed perpetuated this, until Loki reveals to him it was all a lie (an illusion).

In S2, he becomes more flexible, more fun-loving, and more expressive in his affection. In S1, most of his support of Loki manifested as words of affirmation. In S2, his support extended to physical touch and bonding. Mobius, if seen through the lens of a closeted man allegory, finds the courage (and partner) to slowly come out.

#loki #sylvie #mobius #lokius #sylki #loki meta #loki season 2 #loki spoilers #sylkie #my meta #loki series

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blaithnne · 3 months

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I think my one complaint about Anders is that I wish we’d seen him leave of his own accord at least once. Unfortunately I doubt that would be possible due to time constraints but, I think if we’d gotten to see how Hilda was affected by him actually leaving and not being fairynapped it would have better shown what kind of person he is, and been a really good representation of what a lot of real kids go through. That moment where Hilda finally realised her Father abandoned her is so heartbreaking, raw, and real, and the fact that it’s later revealed he didn’t kind of undermines that.

I’m not against Anders changing for the better - it’s a kids show, and it makes sense they’d want to give him a character arch instead of just introducing him to be a dick lol. It also makes sense for his character to have nearly losing his entire family forever be a wake up call for him. But I wish we’d gotten more time with him, and really seen the effects of him leaving for real. Without that, we can generally assume that it had the same effect as him being kidnapped did in canon, but it’s just not the same.

I’m of the opinion that introducing Hilda’s dad as a concept was a good decision, and I don’t think it undermines the shows found family. It gives Hilda a relatable and realistic aspect to her that I think is important for kids in similar situations to see. I am, however, very biased in that regard.

My biological father was an asshole who fucked off before I was born, but I’ve had no absence of family or fatherly role models - I’m very close with my adoptive dad and my grandad. But that didn’t mean I never had questions, or insecurities.

It’s easy to look at fictional tropes and say that found family is clearly superior and biology doesn’t mean shit, and that’s true! But when you’re living in that reality, when you’re young and coming to terms with it for the first time, it’s hard. Especially when you’re surrounded by people who all have blood relations with their families, and when the person you’re related to is regarded as a dick. it really makes you feel isolated and like there’s something wrong with you, like you’re an outsider — you’re different.

Real life people are messy and have insecurities that defy reason, you might logically know that biology doesn’t matter, but when you’re thirteen and insecure and full of inner turmoil, you can’t help but feel bad.

Personally, as I got older, I met people in similar situations and realised I wasn’t alone, that it was okay to have those feelings but it didn’t make them true. But at that age, having grown up in a rural community, I really was alone.

Hilda’s insecurities in season 3 are a great representation of that, she feels like she’s never had a proper family, this thing with Frida, David, Tontu, Alfur and Johanna and Astrid is all new to her. You can tell her Father’s absence has hurt her, how she’s felt different and alone and like something was missing. Hilda defines her worth through her relationships with others, how she can help them make them happy, it destroyed her when she felt like she failed Frida, imagine how she feels about her father.

What I think season 3 was missing was for Hilda to realise that she doesn’t need Anders, and that her happiness isn’t reliant on him being there, I wish she’d had a tad more agency in the relationship, yk? She wants him to be in her life, and he’s going to make an effort now to do that, but she has a support system in place and will be perfectly fine without him. I wish the show had properly acknowledged that just because this is how things ended up, it wasn’t the only option — with or without Anders, Hilda would still have been happy with her family in the end, the fact that he’s a part of it is a nice bonus, but not an essential one.

In general, I think Anders is the best they could do with the time they were given. Having him be a realistic shitty dad who loves his daughter but is just so bad at it is relatable and realistic, though I wish they’d better emphasised that just because he loves hers that doesn’t make his actions okay (perhaps by slightly altering Johanna’s moment with Hilda at the end of The Job), because it’s clear, I think, as a diehard fan, but might not be for more casual viewers.

Having him be redeemable and stick around to do better is a good conclusion for his arch, it’s a happy ending all around and makes sense for the story - it could’ve been weird if they just had him show up and then immediately leave with zero resolution to his character, unless they made him an all out irredeemable abuser, which I think would’ve been worse than what we got. Portraying abusers as unforgivable and cartoonish villains only makes it harder for real life victims to recognise their situations, so if it couldn’t be portrayed properly (which thanks to time constraints and the overall narrative I don’t believe it could be) I’m glad they went with something else.

What we’ve got is, and I know I’ve said this many times lol, a realistic depiction of a crappy, absentee father, that young viewers can recognise and relate to. On that end, the biggest issues are Hilda’s lack of agency within their storyline, since she has no control in the resolution of their relationship, young people looking to this show for ways to cope with their own situations might be discouraged by the end resolution of “he decided to stick around”, since that resolution rests on his decision, not Hilda’s, if that makes sense.

TLDR; Overall, I think Anders’ was a good character and the best that could’ve been done with what the team was given, but,

A) I wish we’d gotten to see him leave of his own accord at least once, so that Hilda’s final realisation that he left her on purpose has more impact and doesn’t loose its meaning in retrospect, and,

B) That Hilda had more agency in the final resolution of their dynamic, that their happily ever after wasn’t entirely reliant on Anders swearing he won’t leave. An alternative solution, maybe presented earlier on in the season when he first left, that provided her with a coping mechanism/outlet in case he does, so that her happiness and mental health isn’t in his hands, would’ve been pretty neat.

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kyrieeleisonelise · 4 months

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Ai’s true feelings?

(Spoilers!)

Judging by the amount of times I’ve seen with this manga panel on tumblr and YouTube, Ruby’s interpretation of Ai in the recent chapter has definitely made a stir.

Is this really how Ai felt?

Realistically, it would be difficult to accurately re-tell the life story of somebody as secretive as Ai once they are long-dead.

In the world of the Manga though, we are supposed to understand the movie as being at least mostly an accurate representation of Ai’s life, since they have the analytical genius Akane point out it’s ‘90% accurate’.

But when it comes to the topic of Ai’s feelings, it seems significant that both Ruby and Aqua- who sometimes seem to represent the two sides of Ai- interpret her differently.

Throughout the manga, but especially the movie arc, we are seeing two different interpretations of Ai. There is Nino and to an extent Aqua who think Ai was as emotionally invincible as she acted.

Then there is Ruby and the director (and even Kana) who recognise that there was probably a lot of dark feelings and anger that Ai felt she had to hide.

Even the Director, who has the tapes of Ai we’re yet to see admits he feels like he never got to see the true Ai, even when she was trying to be honest with him. This further cements the idea that nobody really knows how Ai feels.

We’ve seen hints about Ai hiding darker emotions throughout the chapter, but Ruby’s interpretation of her seems more extreme. Did Ai have this much hate in her heart? Or is Ruby projecting her own feelings?

In chapter 136 we see the argument between Nino and Ai being acted out by Ruby and Kana.

I think we are meant to take the acted-out argument as being an accurate representation of what actually happened between Nino and Ai. From Kana’s insights while playing the role, I get the impression that Nino was so upset by Ai not only because she was jealous, but because Ai, someone who she thought of as a friend, seemed indifferent to her. Ai just gave glib responses when Nino was trying to express that she was struggling, and when Nino lashed out and tells Ai that she wishes she was dead, Ai just smiles at her.

Nino thinks Ai doesn’t care- Nino means so little to her that her hatred can’t hurt her at all. Even years later, Nino still maintains that Ai probably immediately forgot what Nino said to her.

But I really don’t think Ai was unaffected by Nino’s words. Kana was probably right when she said Nino and Ai used to be friends. Anyone would be hurt if a friend wished them dead.

We met Ai’s mother a few chapters back, and it’s revealed that she gave up custody of Ai out of jealousy over her beauty (when Ai was 8!?) Having someone else in her life hate her over her looks probably really hurt Ai, and maybe even made her angry . If Kana is right about Nino and Ai being friends, it probably hurt even more to have another person she cares about reject her out of jealousy.

Why didn’t Ai just tell Nino how upset she was? If Nino saw Ai’s human side it may of lead to them actually making up and deepening their friendship.

Ai had a really troubled upbringing; She was abused and abandoned by her mother and then raised in a children’s home. It isn’t surprising that she had a lot anger in her heart.

To protect herself, Ai would lie about how she felt and pretend she didn’t have feelings and that nothing could hurt her. Eventually it seems like lying became automatic and Ai didn’t know how to stop, how to express herself truthfully or what the truth even was any more.

When Ai first meets Ichigo, she uses her traumatic background as a defence mechanism to try and unsettle him and chase him off. She acts tough, saying that she doesn’t care she was put in a children’s home. She protects herself by acting indifferent and making the people around her uncomfortable.

But her reaction when Ichigo gives her some encouragement and tells her she can be an idol and say she loves people ‘until it’s real’ shows she does still want to connect with others, she just doesn’t know how.

Ai was good at lying. So good that some people started to believe she was as detached as she pretended to be. They saw the ‘invincible persona’ she was projecting instead of the traumatised girl.

I don’t know if Ruby’s interpretation of Ai’s feelings are completely accurate. But I do think that Ai was probably deeply, deeply hurt by Nino. Ai’s dismissive reaction to Nino was probably due to Ai’s lack of social skills rather than true indifference. If Ai hated the world in that moment I wouldn’t be surprised, but I don’t think Ai carried any long-term resentment towards Nino.

The Ai we know seemed a bit more socially adept and stable compared to the Ai Ruby portrayed. Ai was probably only around 14 when she had her argument with Nino. I thin as Ai matured she probably realised why Nino lashed out the way she did, but it was too late to repair things.

It’s been mentioned a few times that Ai stopped her ‘catastrophic’ behaviour and matured after her time in theatre troupe, so it will be interesting to see what specifically it was that made her change

I don’t know if the story will ever give us a definite answer on Ai’s actual feelings, or if, just like in real life, we’re left to interpret and guess how a person really felt about something after they’re no longer there to ask.

#oshi no ko #oshi no ko spoilers #oshi no ko analysis #ai hoshino #ruby hoshino #oshi no Ko nino #aqua hoshino #kana arima

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buryyourdoves · 1 year

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Writing Jewish Characters (what not to do, according to one jewish gal on discord) (a probably incomplete list):

(For reference, because I say it a few times: goyische = not Jewish, or relating to non-Jewish things/culture/etc)

Preface:

Many of these are things that some Jews do irl for various personal reasons, and that is 1000% valid and fine!! This is in no way dragging any Jew’s life choices whatsoever. When it comes to representation, there is a huge skew in one direction: the Jew-ish, bacon cheeseburger-loving, Xmas-celebrating, modern Jew whose nagging, kvetching Jewish family comes up for a special holiday or life event episode and is never heard from again. The implication is that Jewish traditions don’t fit modern people/society and that a non-Jewish audience can’t connect with a Jewish character who remains close to their cultural roots. All that to say, this piece is all about representation, not necessarily irl accuracy.

Primer:

Jewish characters don’t have to be “religious,” and definitely not in the way you might conceive of a religious Xtian character. But being an irreligious Jew doesn't inherently mean they won't follow any Jewish rituals or holidays. It’s a culture as much as it is a religion, and there are a million reasons an atheist Jew (not an oxymoron!) might follow any of these rituals/rules, including but not limited to cultural heritage, community, and religious family/friends <3

Eating treif (aka never-kosher food like pork and shellfish):

They don’t have to keep kosher (altho that would be a very welcome change just one (1) time ksdjg), just don’t make them actively not kosher. I know it feels super innocuous to talk about Erik Lensherr grabbing a bacon egg and cheese from the bodega, but it sticks out to me every time because it is, in itself, a statement. If that's a statement you want to be making, think about why. What are you trying to add to this Jewish character by giving him bacon, or shrimp, or a cheeseburger, etc etc. And is it something you think is a positive addition, or is the implication just that not eating bacon is silly, or outdated, or only something super duper religious Jews could ever want to do? If so, maybe skip the shrimp. It’s a tiny thing that can really make a big difference.

True bonus points: actively have the character keep a semblance of kosher. A simple, 2-second choice for a character to turn down a bite of their coworker’s pork fried rice because they’re Jewish feels SO NICE to read in an ocean of Jewish characters eating treif.

A lot of media codes Jewish characters by drawing attention to the fact that they’re eating bacon, even though they “shouldn’t.” Very little media codes Jews by having them leave the cheese off their burger.

(And if you do write them eating non-kosher, a friendly reminder that Jews who don’t keep kosher don’t think about how disappointed their mother would be everytime they bite into a piece of bacon. They just eat it lol.)

Interfaith parents/“half-Jews”:

I feel it necessary to reassure with this one in particular that there is nothing wrong with this, and both matrilineal and patrilineal Jews deserve representation. This is common enough irl and if they identify with the Jewish side of their heritage to consider themselves Jewish, that’s great! Variety is the spice of life. Once again, I want to emphasize that I am not making any judgments on irl Jews in any of these complaints.

This is only up for representation discussion because this feels like another trend in media and fandom, where it seems like one parent is Certified Not Jewish™️ almost as an excuse to…have Jewish characters not have to be Jewish except in name. Interfaith families are almost always shown mainly celebrating Xtian holidays, with a tiny nod to Judaism: agiant Xmas tree with a menorah to the side, or an Easter episode with a throwaway mention of Passover (if anything). Mainstream media especially will do either this, or have both parents be Jewish and the main character be such a ~disappointment~ to their parents for being less so, and of course falling into lots of icky stereotypes along the way.

Basically just, don’t not write interfaith characters, but be careful with them. Please don’t use interfaith characters as your reason excuse to let them do the Goyische Stuff, like celebrating Xmas. And speaking of…

Christmas (derogatory):

My opinion on Jewish characters celebrating Xmas, my prayer hands and shameless begging, is just…please don’t do it. I get it, plenty of irl Jews participate in Xmas activities or even celebrate it with their friends and extended families, that’s fine, absolutely no judgment. But without getting into the whole shebang of christian hegemony and the myth of secular Christmas, that’s already EVERYWHERE. Almost every tv show, every movie that has Xmas in it, if there’s a Jewish character, there’s a solid 98% chance they celebrate Xmas too. Maybe even LOVE it. Maybe there’s even a confused goyische friend going, “aren’t you Jewish?” and the Xmas-loving Jew happily informs them why that doesn’t matter, or how actually only their dad is Jewish (and he loves Xmas too so woo!) so they get to do the whole Xmas shebang and maybe have a lil menorah off to the side for the token representation.

Jews who participate in or celebrate Xmas exist, but this is a reminder that those who don’t also exist, and they are not remotely uncommon. And we don’t feel deprived for not having had Xmas, I promise. Go against the grain! For lols you can even have your Jewish character be half clueless about Xmas traditions because he never had them! Ben Grimm who has no idea what a garland is and at this point he’s too afraid to ask. There’s so much you can do with it and have fun with in a way that still keeps your Jewish blorbo unassimilated <3

There Was Only One Jew:

Most content has one (1) Jew and that’s that. It’s almost like there’s a rule that there can only be one (1) Jew per friend group. If you have more than one Jewish character, then slay! More Jews are always welcome, and the more you have, the more leeway there is, imo. It feels less egregious for, e.g., a Jewish character to loooooove shrimp if you’ve got another in the story who’s never touched it in his life and never plans to. (Although, when deciding which characters to do this with, consider making the more observant one your main, instead of relegating them to the background and/or parental characters.)

In Summary…

Thanks for reading!! There’s no one way to write Jewish characters, but I hope this helped give you something to think about! I’m always happy to answer questions if you want to learn more. You can also check out the Jewish and Judaism tags on the Writing With Color blog if you want to hear opinions from other Jews. (Not affiliated, just love their blog, haha!) These are just my thoughts on these things after reading a lot of Jewish characters (canon or headcanoned) in fic. 😊

B’hatzlacha! <3

#writing tips #jewish representation #writing jewish characters #jumblr #judaism #writblr #writing #representation #writing resource #jewish characters

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thefaiao · 5 months

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What are your inspirations for drawing? Like other artists or things

I'll start with my biggest inspiration, which got me into art as a whole: Adam Adamowicz. I got introduced to him through Skyrim concept art, but I honestly think his Shivering Isles concepts are some of the best concept art out there. You can see how much he just takes an idea and completely sores with it. A torrential stream of beautiful sketchy goodness.

I love Oblivion's flat ass dough faces and early Xbox 360 charm, but this shit is simply crazy. Look at this, it makes you wish to dedicate your life to bringing this to life, as all good concept art should. It inspires more of itself.

I could post all the images there are out there, because I sincerely think this is the type of work that has stuck with me the most. It's something to strive for. You can see it for yourself instead. That was what got me started. After that, and through my journey on Tumblr and Twitter, I think what stuck to me the most was the art done by small artists, my "compatriots". The things you don't see. There is so much love in little things, and maybe in another universe there are entire cultures dedicated to them. I wish we had time to explore each and every one of the smallest pieces of media, especially narrative media, weird media.

I'll concede that it's a bit of an abstract thing to be inspired by, but once you realise how much work goes into the smallest of things, I believe you'll find inspiration anywhere you go. I think the reason why my Batter drawings are the way they are is my inspiration from just the design of letters and fonts in general. I think making something that blurs the line of symbol and representation over and over is fun.

One artist that has stuck with me is the late great Gunner Leatherwood. He passed away earlier this year. I watched this guy grow from a hundred followers to thousands. I saw his art improve. I think that inspiration transcends just the visual aspect of the art. It's a story, a lived experience, as all art is, but I felt I understood it much more. I think going after and following these small artists pay off because of this. Everyone can make something truly great, and some people have and no one noticed. Many amazing animated movies have been made, but never got to the people who would understand them, who'd have dedicated themselves to easing other people into it. We like to think we understand media in a completely intuitive, isolated fashion, but it's not true at all. Our shared experience contributes to classics being recognised and loved. Sometimes you need the right person at the right time to understand. Gunner was a great artist because of how intuitive and visceral his drawings were. It was like he was drawing from his entire life experience to express himself in a page. At first he had little control of it, but with time it was molded and polished so that the madness was discernable, but not gone from the drawing. His mindset for drawing was fun, and he too was always going after small artists of all kinds.

But going back to Batter drawings and abstraction, an artist that has also inspired me over the years in that aspect of bluring symbol and representation into one solid thing, and similarly started somewhat small like Gunner, is Matt Lesniewski. His hatching is out of this world, and his character design is evocative and never boring. The characters are huge balls of symbols made into physical objects. Recently he straight-up draws the belts of characters floating. It's wonderful.

Another artist that does this bluring very well, and is very inspiring, is nailgun waowao. They really, well, nail the appeal of making images that have all the defining elements of a certain scene or character, but open closer look they are fragmented and completely abstracted. It's like a bigger image overlayed with many smaller stories and symbols.

But to go back to talking about active inspirations that came before, and got to me to where I am at the moment, it's a bit harder. I can't really make it sound smart besides going "uuh I don't know like abstract stuff, cubism idk lol." Just try to appreciate the great things your friends make, and try and work together to make something even greater.

Some of the most improvement I had in art was from learning with friends. Art ultimately is a form of communication, understanding other people and yourself will make you better at it. Technical skill is fun and speaks for itself, but your experiences will reach much deeper. In a world where we can't even begin to compreehend the powers that be, loving and understanding what is close is probably gonna make your life and art much better.

#long

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vyeoh · 5 months

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i dont understand watchers lmao

like i kind of get the gist

but i did not watch evo

and do not have time to (sadly)

so...help???

Luckily for you, the watchers at this point are pretty removed from the Evo ones! There are some pretentious purists out there, as with anything, that like to bitch about people not following the original script (god knows I'm guilty of this with other stuff lol) and I've noticed bitching about this specifically becoming more popular, but I'm assuming you're coming to me about the lifer series watchers and not Evo watchers. That being said, here's Vio's Watcher guide of questionable accuracy:

The Life Series watchers are only really "canon" in Martyn's lore, with them being referenced but not explicitly canonized in the Secret Life state (the symbol on the mask is their symbol from Evo but no one else really has lore, period, so I hesitate to count this as more than an easter egg for anyone else but Martyn). From what I can tell, the Watchers retained a few things from their Evo lore:

1) The ability to move players to new worlds- In Evo, the Watchers were the ones who moved people to more updated versions of the game (the series concept was playing survival but gradually updating the game version as they went). This ability lends to the life series Watchers being the "gamemakers" and being able to put players in a new game ever season

2) Grian - at the end of his Evo series (tho notably not the Evo series in general), he was taken after jumping into the end portal by the Watchers. Based on the end credit poem being replaced with a dialouge between two of them, and a third one joining in at the end, the assumption is that Grian became a Watcher. As Grian is also the server owner for the Life Series, him being a Watcher plays well into the Watchers being the game runners. I'm not sure how canon this is in Martyn's lore or if it's still an unknown, but it is a prevailing theory that Grian's involvement isn't part of the other Watcher's plans and is to try and fuck up their shit on the inside and essentially do damage control for his friends. This is based off of the quote "He was never meant to interfere, he was onlt ever meant to watch" from Martyn's videos. However, c!Martyn, who is the perspective we see, is not omniscient and therefore there's a lot we just don't know.

3) Listeners/ why the Watchers seem to hate Martyn and also Jimmy: from what I understand from the little Evo lore I remember (this was years ago lmao), the Listeners appeared later as an antagonistic force to the Watchers, and got Martyn and Jimmy on their side. They were presented as a route to freedom vs the Watchers, but once again unreliable narration needs to be kept in mind. This is likely why the Watxhers keep fucking w Martyn specifically (and might provide an in canon reason for why Jimmy keeping dying first as well lmao) but it hasn't really be touched on beyond 1) Martyn is canonically a Listener and 2) the Watchers know he's a Listener

4) So.... what are the Watchers? - this one is, canonically, unknown and therefore the source of the aforementioned pretentious bitching. You need to keep in mind that mcyt roleplay is not structured and Evo especially didn't start out expecting deep worldbuilng. This, plus the fact that the Watchers are higher powers that different people have different opinions on, means there's going to be a lot of info that just doesn't line up, from both a meta and in canon perspective.

One theory is that they're a representation of viewers. This is at least somewhat true, imo, based on how Grian "becomes a viewer" after ending his series. This is not canon, but personally I do like this theory lol. This also carries into Secret Life, where viewers can submit tasks via the statue. However, I don't think this is canonized ever and might just be more symbolic than literal. There's also a theory that Watchers vs Listeners are a dichotomy between the bad viewers who just "watch" and demand things without "listening" to the players, while Listeners are viewers what actually "listen" to what the players want to do. However, as with everything, this is speculation based off of a 3rd person limited perspective.

5) Are they evil?- once again, depends on who you ask and what version you're talking about. According to c!Martyn in both series, yes. According to c!Grian from Martyn's lore, probably? Or at least he doesn't like this particular plan of theirs. According to Evo fans who remember them as just "plot bunny for why the version of the world keeps changing", probably not. We really don't know a ton about them and so you are free to make them as evil as you want or as neutral as you want.

This is preally much all ik about the Watchers and how they relate to the Life Series. You will notice that most of it is theories or hinted at things. The beauty of mcrp as a genre is that it's very semi-formal, and so canon is a bit wiggley. So TLDR: do whatever the fuck you want lmao. You don't need mine or anyone else's approval. It's your right to do what you want with canon, just as it's your right to bitch about it on the internet. Just don't be a dick about it and everything will be fine 👍

#vio.ask #anon respectfully why did u come ask me #i dont care what people do w the Watchers i play w them as god figures in my paper doll world #life series #grian #inthelittlewood #secret life #also unless you are martyn inthelittlewood i will not see any 'corrections' [#on this post. no discourse allowed unless ypur word is actually canon #this is simply my interpretation and i do not want to deal w people arguing w me rn lol

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multifanrae · 5 months

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Reasons why Tim and Sasha’s friendship is so fucking important to me. (An appreciative essay to the Magnus Archives and also a mostly related rant on how media usually portrays relationships)

#1 and also the most important, their friendship is just so GOOD. Like yeah what we see is mostly just joking around and a bit of poking fun, but it’s so completely free of malice which is actually really hard to achieve. Because that’s what my friends and family do to each other but it always seems like there’s some deeper undertones that end up at least slightly hurting someone, but from the intonation and the small insight we get into their relationship, that harmful part seems to be absent and like it really is just fun to pass the time and make conversation. And in order for that to work, the relationship has to be really deep and vulnerable to negate that kind of preying on insecurity which just shows how close they really are

#2 having a man and woman just be really close friends for some reason just means a lot to me personally. I know they allude to past relations, but the core of it is they both recognize and respect that they’re really just good friends, and even though they explored a sexual/possibly romantic avenue, they both concluded it was really just platonic, and it’s agreed upon and respected enough to the point where it can be joked about without discomfort. I just love that they get to be so close and important to one another without the romantic element because I’m so tired of seeing m/f relationships only being romantic and/or sexual especially from an unrequited standpoint. (Specifically when the man, despite many objections and boundaries, continue to see her as a sexual object or conquest)

#3 just having good platonic representation. Don’t get me wrong I’m a slut for romantic subplots. (Mostly when they’re gay because I’m a lesbian deprived of representation but still) I think platonic relationships are incredibly important to represent because they’re so often shown as less significant than a romantic one and that’s not true and not fair. Platonic relationships are incredibly important and incredibly meaningful. In some cases I’d even say more than romantic ones, because there isn’t the expectation of sex (assuming it’s an allo relationship). And friendships tend to last longer than romantic affiliations anyway, so it’s stupid to assume that just because you aren’t romantically or sexually involved that the relationship is inferior

#4 I just fucking love their dynamic. I really think they actually just bring out the best in each other. They’re both smart in similar but different enough ways and they seem to just fuel the best aspects of each of their personalities, even if the teasing may seem crude at first glance

#5 I’ve just been watching the RQGG20 stretch goals with Mike and Alastair and the “hello, my name’s Timothy Stoker, you killed my brother and my best friend, prepare to die” fucking TOOK ME OUT. I know it’s a Princess Bride reference, but the delivery and the fact that the stranger took the two most important people of Tim’s life was a realization that felt like a fucking knife to the chest. (Yes I did only realize that just now). They were seriously such best friends and the fact that Tim was living and interacting with someone he didn’t know wasn’t Sasha is just hurting me all over again. Because the pain I’d feel if my best friend was switched out with a monster and I didn’t notice (even tho that’s literally the point) like the guilt and pain that cause

#I wish we had more of them so badly #I know it’s a horror podcast but come on relationship and character development just really drives home the tragedy so therefore we need mor #the magnus archives #magnuspod #tma #fandom #tim stoker #sasha james

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crazilust · 1 year

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Astro notes (4)

Hi, I'm back once again with some observations. I wanna promise that I'll be back to being consistent, but huh. It's gonna be what it's gonna be. Please disregard anything that doesn't apply to you, this is just for fun.

For a sign that's so fond of freedom, Sagittarius are actually quite clingy when they actually love you. They probably won't admit it, but they'll pretend to miss their buses to see you, ask you to join their day-to-day activities, etc. Quite surprising, if I'm being 100% honest.

You will most likely never catch a Virgo mercury in a lie. Virgo placements in general keep track of things, and won't ever reveal too much of anything. I believe that's the reason why they get away with lying in general. They don't create these absurd, big lies out of nowhere. It's actually believable.

Aries wants to believe in something. Mix it with any sign, and it'll follow that other sign's needs. Mix it with Pisces ? It creates the biggest romantic that wants to believe in love at all cost. Mix it with Capricorn ? They believe in working hard, climbing the ladder of their work's hierarchy. Aries is, in general, very optimistic and they need to channel it somewhere.

I've noticed that people that don't believe in astrology, for the most part, can be the most stereotypical representation of their signs. I believe it's because because they choose to be blind of their birth chart's energy, they tend not to work on it and therefore just become the perfect stereotype of their signs. It's always so funny to me.

12th House synastry's relationship are so intense. You feel like you're doing something wrong, but at the same time, feel like you're growing exponentially faster than with anyone else ever before. It's a "beware before you enter" type of relationships. Definitely not for the weak.

It's so true: Aquarius placements, especially in Venus or 7th house tells you a lot about if someone is going to be queer or at least experiments with the same gender.

Talking about Aquarius, if you ever need advice and want your mind to be absolutely blown, I would talk to an Aquarius. They tend to have such a different way of perceiving the world that if you ever feel like you've explored all the options, talking to them can open up the most obscure and bizarre solutions (that work!)

The moon sign affects you way more than you would think. Your moon sign rules your emotions. For some signs, emotions are supposed to be completely private, for others they can let it out. Two persons of the same sign could have two different exterior reactions but feel the same internally. That's why your entire birth chart is important, people!

Jupiter really blesses with their natives with such an abundance of creativity. Look at Pisces and Sagittarius artists. Not every Sagittarius or Pisces you'll meet will be creative, though, but if they allow themselves to reach that side of them, they can really access depth that other signs might struggle a bit more.

The modality is such an interesting thing to take into consideration. Fixed signs are really self-righteous and the moment they think they're right, they will go pretty far simply because in their minds, it's the right thing to do. They might feel bad if other people mention to them that it's not right, but they won't change their minds. Their work ethic might be flawless because of it, but it can very well turn into a flaw.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

That's it for me, guys. I always love doing these. I'm currently drinking a matcha latte and life is ... good.

Dolly.

#astro notes #astrology notes #astro observations #astro community #astrology #astro placements #sagittarius #virgotraits #aquarius #leowomen #gemini sun #fixed signs #pisces mercury #pisces

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carriesthewind · 11 months

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i know very little about law, but im gonna be honest, i feel a bit bad for the loduca guy. is it a good look to sign a coworkers work without looking? absolutely not, they are paid to be anal about this stuff. but it feels like such a human thing to do, if you worked with someone for 25+ years, and never had a significant reason to doubt their work, to just kind of visually skim over the thing, and then sign and stample, bc you trust the guy.

and yeah maybe you saw he was having some issues with this case, the opposite side/judge asking for some documents they cant find and therefore think are fabricated, but again, you trust your coworker, trust that they did the job and this is a mistake not on his part, and you probably have your own workload to worry about, your own cases, so you think little of it. idk, while a bit lazy (bad look) it feels like something that would happen at an office, you know?

that being said ive got a feeling those people are not going to be practicing law quite soon. more so i dont recall if the law firm was one of theirs, but i assume even if it's not, it will have a very hard time recovering from this

A bit of a long and rambling answer here on just my own thoughts on the matter, so I'm putting it below the cut!

I do feel some sympathy for him...for the first opposition brief. My sympathy vanishes once he submitted the fake "opinions" to the court.

Because I absolutely get trusting your colleague, especially if you have worked with him for so long. And as lawyers, it is a really serious thing to sign a submission to the court that you haven't at least read - but it is also very a very human thing to do. People, including lawyers, cut corners and make errors all the time.

But part of his problem isn't just that he was skimming and signing something - when you sign a submission as an attorney, you are making a very real (and legally binding - that's the point of Rule 11) promise to the court. LoDuca is still listed as Mata's counsel of record (and his only counsel of record in this case). He told the court that he was representing this dude, and he never really was.

I saw someone - I think on twitter? - say he was covering up for Schwartz practicing law without a license. Which is technically true! But it's also - come on, there is (usually) a practical, if not ethical, difference between letting some random pretend to be lawyer by signing and submitting their documents without supervision, and signing and submitting documents for a colleague in a jurisdiction they aren't admitted to without going through the steps of having him formally act as local counsel, when you know the end result would be the same if you walked through the formal steps. I want to be clear - the second thing is not okay at all, and is very much against the rules. But, I am also 100% confident he's not the only person doing it, and I can the the way that someone would feel like it was a justifiable bending, not breaking of the rules.

But even then, the problem is that as attorneys, we are (supposed to be) held to a high ethical standard. I said this in an earlier post, but when an attorney makes representations to the court, the court takes those very seriously, because we are assumed to be following those ethical standards. If I make a legal or factual representation in a courtroom, there can be immediate and real consequences for people's lives.

It's a self-licensing and a self-policing profession, and we what we do has very serious consequences both on a societal and individual level. Even in a simple case like this originally was, a personal injury negligence case brought by an individual - the complaint says the plaintiff suffered serious, disabling injuries and has been prevented from working, and he is seeking compensation for his medical care and his inability to work. If that's true, this case is about (should have been about) who paid for that needed medical care, the necessities of life.

And I think this case is an example of why those rules can matter - sure, most of the time, someone doing what LoDuca was won't get caught, and maybe it won't matter practically. But part of the reasons we have those rules is to try to prevent - well maybe not this bullshit precisely - bullshit like this from happening. "Other people break the rules too and don't get caught" isn't an excuse.

But again, it still is a very human kind of error, so I still have sympathy. The real problem, for me, is the submission of the fake opinions.

Because once he got the order from the court ordering him to provide copies of the opinions or the case would be dismissed, he must have known something was wrong. That is not a normal order to receive. That order means the court (which has access to all the legal research tools he doesn't) thinks something is very seriously wrong. If he did not read that order and immediately go "Oh fuck" and a) read the defendant's reply and b) realize the cases seem to have been fake, he is not competent to practice law. And I mean that in a very serious way - he has no business practicing in the field with such serious consequences for people's lives if he didn't immediately recognize the problem.

So once he got that order, he has no excuse. At that point, he either consciously perpetrated a lie upon the court; or he is too incompetent to practice.

#ask #2 Stupid 2 Sanction

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all-thestories-aretrue · 1 year

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There are many jokes floating around the shadowgast nation about the nature of Caleb and Essek's relationship (eggplants and winky faces abound), and most of them are good natured and perhaps true (eventually or at some point). I find most of them entertaining and sweet, but some of what I have stumbled across post-reunion have highlighted that it's only a joke up to a certain point to me.

Please keep in mind that everything in this post is my opinion and my opinion only. I'm not asking that anyone agree with me. This post is mainly for me because I felt like I needed to make it.

I have seen several comments/posts/tags in many different places talking about Essek and Caleb and that scene in the reunion, and describing it as horny or saying they can't keep their hands off each other or following up that conversation with sexual intimacy. I know a lot of these comments or conversations are not malicious or ill-intentioned, and I understand that people are excited for the first new content in nearly 2 years.

But, one thing I have appreciated about Critical Role is the variety of sexuality and genders represented, including various asexual and aromantic identities. Essek is confirmed by Matt on Twitter to be demi (romantic or sexual is unclear to me so it could be taken as either. If anyone has any other sources I would greatly appreciate them). As someone who identifies as aspec, I deeply appreciate the representation that Critical Role has given me.

The shadowgast scene in the reunion was not sexual to me. It's only been six months since the end of c2, which granted, I have not completed yet. As of this writing, I am in the middle of episode 133. Whatever is going on between Caleb and Essek is still very new, especially for two people who thought they would never have love. An aspect of being demi is that it takes time and closenes and a strong emotional bond for romantic and/or sexual feelings to develop. Six months, to me, feels like an incredibly short time for those feelings to take root for Essek even if he is on the path of developing them.

Seeing people make light of Essek's sexual attraction or feelings for Caleb or treat them as common place or casual, even innocuously, has made me feel as though this aspect of Essek really is ignored or forgotten about sometimes. Not by everyone nor, I would even doubt, the majority. Maybe not intentionally or maliciously or maybe it's a lack of understanding about demisexuality or aspec identities.

This is a feeling I have had for a while, and I mean this about nothing in particular but rather a sum of the parts I have encountered over the months.

In addition, I think Essek's sexuality can be overshadowed by how sexual Caleb can be/is. He makes comments throughout the entirety of the campaign that directly or indirectly reveal his sexuality, and that part is clearly important to him, even if he has not acted on it in a very long time.

I am not saying that Essek is NOT sexually attracted to Caleb or that their relationship does not involve sex at some point or at the time of that scene. I do think, at the very least, that Caleb and Essek would have a conversation about it as some point, and I find it likely it would turn sexual. At the very least, Caleb is attracted to Essek. Liam has confirmed that. I would guess those feelings are a combination of romantic, sexual, platonic, etc.

But I cannot imagine, and again this is my opinion, that feeling sexual attraction or acting on it for the perhaps first or second, maybe third time, is not a life-altering moment for him, let alone acting on it. From what see of his character, he's extrmely gaurded, extremely lonely, extremely shameful. Showing his emotions and attraction to Caleb, or to anyone really, is an extreme show of trust and vulnerability, and I don't think it should be taken lightly.

Treating it, at least in those early months, as though it is common or casual, something taken for granted, feels, to me, as though it undermines the importance and gravity of Essek's feelings, whatever they may be. Further, it undermines aspec identities, relegating them to sidelines if it is even acknowledged at all. I feel as though a lot of the jokes ignore Essek's demisexuality and how integral it is to how he builds relationships and interacts with people.

As someone who is aspec, I find it disheartening to see these sort of jokes and offhand comments being circulated about a character who is confirmed, canon aspec whose identity centers on deep bonds that take time to develop. Applying sexual under/overtones to scene where a small chaste kiss and an innocent pet name are shared feels like, in a way, a forced sexualization of a new, developing relationship that may never turn sexual.

There is such little aspec representation in media, and Critical Role does a fantastic job of showcasing a variety of aspec identities which is so, so rare. To turn around and have the fandom ignore or disregard these identities (intentional or not) that the cast and crew work hard to incorporate feels bad. It makes me feel as though I still have to fight for my identity to be seen and understood by people who, theoretically, support and want to understand and respect various identities, who claim to love Essek and Caleb and their relationship. It hurts.

I have spent a lot of time convincing myself that I and my sexuality belong in the queer community, that I deserve to have a voice, that I deserve to be respected and heard. With my feelings about Essek and his demisexuality, I didn't feel right standing by any longer and remaining silent when these portrayals were bothering me.

I am not asking anyone to change their opinions, to agree with me, to change the fic they write, the art they draw. The Critical Role fandom is beautiful and amazing and absolutely incredible. I have met so many kind, caring, wonderful people since joining. It's an experience unlike any other. But, I needed to make this post for me and anyone else who was feeling like me.

#critical role #shadowgast #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #mighty nein reunited #mighty nein #cr2 #oh boy am i inviting the disk horse by posting this???#probably 😬😬😬#but this is something that has been bothering me for a few months and the reunion just confirmed it #please be kind if you choose to interact #this is not meant to be mean or ill intentioned toward anyone #i just needed to get it off my chest #if one other person who feels similar sees this posting it will be worth it #i understand my own experiences heavily influence my opinions here #but really the cr fandom overall has been so welcome and wonderful and kind #its been amazing!#thank u for reading this long ass post if you make it to the end #oh boy i am nervous about posting this #which is exactly why i feel like i should post it

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gemini-magic17 · 7 months

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Entanglement Chapter Five

*Just a disclaimer the gifs I used for the reader are not a representation of what she is meant to look like it is mainly for her expressions.

As we were shown to our rooms I couldn't get Kit out of my head. I could tell she had reservations about this whole thing and I mean who wouldn't, especially when you have no idea who this person is. She portrayed confidence and strength which is something I can't help but admire about her. Maybe this marriage won't be so bad it may even be blissful.

Arriving at their chambers my family began to settle in and started to prepare for tonight's celebration. My room was the last stop and the Queen decided to place mine and Kit's room across from each other. Entering the room there were silk sheets on the bed and books that were spread around the room.

"I hope the room is to your liking. Your father told me how much you love to read", Queen Sorsha said.

"It is great thank you so much."

"I know that this betrothal must have been a surprise but I really think that you and Kit will be happy together", she smiled sincerely.

"I hope that is true. Kit seems like a wonderful person and I can tell how independent as well as intelligent she is."

"If I didn't know better I would say that you already have feelings for my daughter", she smirked.

"I definitely do feel something for her I just don't know what that is just yet", I said shyly.

"Well if I know my daughter it may take time for her to warm up to this but I know she will grow to love the wise, beautiful, smart young lady in front of me", she said smiling.

"You are too kind Queen Sorsha."

"I mean every word Y/n. I will let you get settled and will see you later on at my birthday celebration."

I watched as she gracefully walked out of my chambers leaving to attend to tonight's celebration details I assumed. Having no clue where to start I decided to look back at the book with the dragon lore. Opening the page marked with the prophecy I kept thinking it over trying to figure out if there was something actually behind this. Not noticing the page before I see a full-page drawing of a girl with wings sprouting from her back. I don't know if I was being crazy but I could see some resemblance between myself and it. The h/c hair and s/c portrayed in the drawing is uncanny to how I look. I think I am starting to imagine this stuff because this cannot possibly be real. However, if dragons were real once like my father had said then this prophecy must have some truth in it, right?

Putting the book away I begin to unpack my clothes and find something to wear for tonight. You would think being a Princess with an unlimited supply of dresses there would be no problem choosing what to wear. Yet, for the life of me, I can't make a decision. I don't know if it is because I am nervous or that I'm just indecisive. After what seemed to be a long time I finally picked what I could only think to be the perfect dress.

*Skip to tonight

The night seemed to be in full swing with a room full of guests there to celebrate the Queen's birthday. Dancing and laughter filled the halls as though they never had before. However, not everyone was enjoying the party and by everyone I meant me.

"I would say this party is to celebrate my mother's birthday but knowing her she just planned this so she could announce the betrothal like she said."

"I would say that doesn't sound like something your mother would do but that would be a lie", Jade said laughing.

"I can't wait for this stupid ass affair to be over. I much rather be alone with you", I smiled insinuating we should go somewhere later.

Jade smiled agreeing with what I was saying. About to continue our conversation the sound of the hall's doors opening got everyone's attention. Oh great here we go. The guard at the door announced the arrival of the royals.

"Presenting King Aiden and Queen Raina Ravaryn of Zemira", they made their way down the hall next to my mother.

"Presenting Prince James Ravaryn of Zemira", the prince seemed to have some arrogance shown across his face which made me want to strike him.

"Presenting Princess Y/n Ravaryn of Zemira", slowly making her way everyone's eyes were on her.

"So, that's the Princess huh", Jade questioned.

"Yep, that's her. Not much to her though. When I met her she seemed rather dull and boring. My mother fawned over her though but that was no surprise seeing as she picked her to be my wife", I rolled my eyes.

"I wouldn't say she is dull it seems when she walks into a room everyone stops and stares. Plus she has captured everyone's attention with her beauty."

"That's all about what she has going for her", I said shaking my head.

Walking into this room made me self-conscious. All the whispers and stares from everyone had me questioning whether or not they already knew about my union with Kit. As I got to where the Queen and my family were the whispers just got worse. As if Queen Sorsha could tell how uncomfortable I was she held the attention of the hall.

"To my esteemed guests, I have invited you here tonight not just for my birthday but to make an announcement", she beckoned Kit to come up. I could see that Kit was reluctant to do what she said. Once Kit was by her side she continued.

"I am happy to announce that my daughter Kit and Princess Y/n will be married in three months' time. Their union will bring prosperity and happiness between our two kingdoms", she smiled and the crowd cheered.

In the corner of my eye, I could see Kit looking at a girl seated in the middle of the hall. I began questioning who she was and how did she know Kit. After the cheering settled down I made my way toward Ser Easton seeing as the rest of my family was busy and Kit was spending her time with that girl. Before I could reach him I was stopped by a few people who kept asking how I felt about my soon-to-be marriage. I tried my best to give an answer that didn't sound like I was uncertain.

"It's great, I am honored to be marrying a wonderful person. She is strong, kind, and incredibly smart", I smiled.

Ending the conversation I made my way back to where Ser Easton was only he was nowhere in sight.

As the night went on my eyes lingered on Kit and the girl she was with. Throughout the night I heard her brother Airk say her name was Jade. I could tell they were close, especially since they were huddled up in a corner together not talking to anyone else. I even tried to talk to her but to no avail she just avoided me as if I had the plague.

"Hello, princess", I heard Ser Easton say from right beside me.

"Hi, I was looking for you earlier but you disappeared."

"I'm sorry I was discussing something with your father", he said.

"May I ask what it was"?

"Your father thinks it would be best for me to stay by your side in Tir Asleen since you will not have the comforts of home", he said smiling.

"Really", I say with hope.

"Your father does not want you to be alone in a place that is not home", I couldn't stop smiling then that smile slowly started to fade from the scene that had unfolded in front of me.

There was a genuine smile on her face when dancing with Jade and whenever I tried to talk to her the only look I get is hate. Even though I don't really know her my heart started to break and my eyes started to water.

"Princess, are you alright", Ser Easton asked.

I pry my eyes away from the scene I looked at him saying, "I'm fine there is just something in my eyes."

Ser Easton looked at what I couldn't take my eyes off a moment ago. He said, "Y/n crying over her is not worth it. What have I always told you"?

"That someone who makes you cry is someone that is not worth your tears or time", I said remembering what he did when he told me this as a child.

"That's right. You are a strong, fierce, and independent woman who does not need anyone who make you feel less than."

"Thank you, Ser Easton", looking back at the scene I couldn't be here anymore.

"If you excuse me I need to go get some fresh air", I said only to hear Ser Easton saying that he would accompany me just to tell him that I wanted to be alone. As I left I could feel his eyes boring into my back knowing that he was concerned and worried about what just happened.

Not knowing where to go I just kept walking with the thoughts of Kit and Jade overtaking my mind. Before I know it I am not in the castle I'm making my way towards the woods. Out of nowhere, the tears start to flow and I can't breathe. I was insane thinking that I could just come here and have a happy life. Instead, I will have one filled with nothing but sadness and loneliness. I tried to get to know her but how can you do that when she avoided me or that she just pretended that I didn't exist.

As the tears continued streaming down my face I heard a loud noise. It almost resembled the sound of a tree falling. Again came the noise but it was followed by the sounds of a roar. Next thing I knew a gust of wind came out of nowhere blowing dirt and leaves all around me. Suddenly I heard the roar again only it was followed by what was behind the sound. I looked up at the sky and couldn't believe what I was seeing. It was a dragon, before my very eyes alive and soaring across the night sky.

As I followed it with my eyes I could tell it was just circling the area not really knowing why it was doing it. Then all of a sudden it made a beeline for where I was standing. I ran the opposite way from where I came from standing in an open field thinking I had lost it landed right behind. Slowly turning around to meet the dragon's eyes I am amazed as to what I see. It was Calyx.

Standing right in front of me I should be afraid of him but I wasn't. I reached out my hand slowly to touch the side of his face so as not to scare him. I could tell he was cautious of me as though I was going to hurt him. I looked into his eyes and felt this instant connection with him almost like I could call him my home and me his. He relaxed into my touch and warmed up to me. As if something had startled him he flew off. Watching him fly off into the distance I questioned if I would ever see him again but in my heart, I knew I would.

#hazel callahan x reader #kit tanthalos x reader

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bikenesmith · 8 months

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Despite [Xavier's] previous insistence that he is only whole when able-bodied, he comes to terms very quickly with his return to disability: “My back is shattered, a parting gift from the Shadow King… It appears… if I am ever to achieve my dream… I will need all of you… to walk me there” (Nicieza 23). In the span of a single panel, Xavier acknowledges that he is once again disabled, accepts it, and asks his teammates for help. Due to his previous elation at becoming able-bodied, one would think he would require more time to adjust, to shift his identity once more from “able-bodied” to “differently-abled.” The ease in which Professor X resumes his disabled identity lends itself to the notion that being able-bodied, not disabled, is a plot device. He takes more time to adjust to using his legs than he does to losing them, a pattern generally reversed when other characters become disabled. This smooth transition back to disability implies that his truest identity is as a disabled man.

(emphasis mine) was reading crippled crusaders: disability representation in the superhero genre by cassandra m. nicol a few days ago and was struck by this bit....the idea that charles' "true" self is a disabled self is really interesting. (edited) crosspost from twitter:

the dominant, most objective read is that charles becomes abled, is disabled, + becomes abled again ad nauseam. yet those narrative tendencies have inadvertently created a reading where charles' disability is, functionally, a chronic illness that flares due to outward stimuli.

whether charles' paraplegia is due to physical injury or a brain/psychosomatic/astral issue isn't clear, having been complicated over the years by all the different ways the text has chosen to able + re-disable him.

what makes the most sense to me is leaning into that ambiguity. its both — either mental or physical injury/ailment can cause him disablement. and the back + forth of charles' paraplegia signifies he's uniquely in danger of that specific disablement — paraplegia/spine issues. and those issues happen ALL the time in real-life non-psychic people who experience (non-psychic….i presume) brain damage. the brain + the spine, the central nervous system, they're basically extensions of each other, and are some of the most important parts of your body.

so you can extrapolate that charles has a particularly "weak" spine, and it's likely to give out if he experiences intense physical or psionic injury. and as an x-man, he risks that often.

i also think the "ease" with which he moves from ability one state to another that nicol mentions is important to this. to be clear: we have seen charles agonize over his disability, and especially losing his ability. it's undeniable that it impacts him emotionally. but charles doesn't go through the intense "grieving" process a lot of newly disabled ppl do — the kind he went through himself when he was recovering from his first spinal injury. as nicol points out:

In Xavier’s next appearance two issues later, he is seated in a golden wheelchair and seems insistent that his disability not hinder his participation in X-Men adventures. Instead he emphasizes his usefulness with his telepathic powers, declaring, “I too shall be coming. Though I am crippled once again, my particular talents may be needed there” (Portacio and Byrne 6). His disabled status is stressed through a visual weight of the word “crippled,” both bolded and italicized in the comic panel, similar to how “whole” was stressed when he became able-bodied in 1983. But here, “crippled” is not laden with judgment. It is merely an acknowledgement of Xavier’s condition. This smooth transition back to disability in some ways rectifies his description of “able-bodied” as “whole,” as Charles insists that even paraplegic once more, he is still more than capable of being an X-Man, and he is still the most powerful mutant in the world. Regardless of the state of his physical body, Charles knows that his disability need not impose limitations on his actions; he harnesses his role as leader of the X-Men and his disability is, effectively, relegated to background information.

of course this is in part bc he'd already been paraplegic for years, but you can also see it as him just being ready for it. seeing it as an eventuality, a familiar state that he will return to throughout his life. a chronic disability that exists whether or not he can walk.

There is one more major instance in which Professor X becomes able-bodied. In 2002, a mutant named Xorn restores Xavier’s ability to walk (Morrison, “All Hell” 32). This is the most short-lived instance of Xavier being able-bodied. Only a year later, Xorn is revealed to be Magneto in disguise, one of Professor X’s oldest enemies; Xorn removes the nano-sentinels that had been holding Xavier’s spine together, crippling him again (Morrison, “Planet X” 19). Later, once freed from captivity, Xavier reappears in a chair with alien-like legs, giving him autonomous movement (Morrison, “Phoenix Invictus” 27). This time, he makes no mention of his return to paraplegia. He is in full command of the X-Men, and has again made a smooth identity transition from “able-bodied” to “differently-abled.” The fact that this occurs once more stresses that to be disabled is part of Charles Xavier’s truest identity, and that being able-bodied is a temporary plot point rather than a character trait.

and that raises the question…what does this mean in the krakoa age? does a newly grown body come without that disability? or is it a "symptom" of his mutation? is it imprinted in his mind-soul-whatever you want to call what part of a person cerebro catalogues?

throughout all of krakoa era, there's never been any mention of what charles feels about making his bodies ambulatory. the closest thing we have is the knowledge that he brought his own wheelchairs with him to krakoa which is a solid point in that theory's direction at least.

(interjection from a subsequent thread:

keep thinking abt the fact that charles brought his chairs with him to krakoa…in this place allegedly free of death or sickness he still prepares for his needs to change, as if its an immutable part of him that can resist miracle drugs + literal resurrection.

its so quintessentially x-men that we only get that interesting insight in the backdrop of an ableist story beat where a character is punished and humiliated by…. being dis-abled.

i'm still floored by how incompetent and tactless that whole thing was but that was the same book that gave us hits like kitty's "viking funeral", emma flashing men to distract them instead of using her, you know, telepathy, emma worrying about eating carbs, + other such bullshit. but i'm still surprised it went so under-discussed in x-comics fandom)

via xuân's resurrection, we know that its possible to request your physical disability be preserved when you're resurrected. so this must have been an active choice of his.

i don't think it's odd at all that charles would choose to walk considering his past feelings about it i just wish the text contended with that like at all 😭 but getting into charles' feelings abt his disability is a long ass post for another day.

(i accessed this paper on proquest here via my alma mater. if you would like to read it yourself but are not connected to an institution or library that has access, dm me and i'll send you the pdf!)

addendum: examples of charles’ disability as neurological illness and/or chronic illness

#charles xavier #professor x #xmen #x men #cherik #Me If Tagging Posts That Are Just About Charles or Erik Separately As Cherik Was A Job: 💵💵💵💵💵#x.txt

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1moreff-creator · 8 months

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Thank you DRDT crew!

Even though I’ve only been a fan for a short time compared to others, the amount of love I have for this series is hard to put into words. It has slowly grown to be my favorite DR-related media of all time, for a multitude of reasons. Everything about it is remarkably impressive, and I just wanted to say thank you for bringing us such an amazing experience.

I got into DRDT through Weeby Newz’ streams. I had just finished binge watching her SDRA2 streams, but this “Danganronpa Despair Time” one looked interesting. Especially because I kept seeing a video by Ocean Unknown popping up in my recommended, which said something about “David’s reveal”. So I decided to watch those vods too.

Fast-forward a binge watch, and… I was in love. It didn’t even register how attached I’d gotten to every single character, and how intrigued I was to see how everything would play out.

I absolutely wouldn’t have started a Tumblr blog without DRDT. But now I have, and it’s been one of the most fun experiences I’ve had in fandom. So, from the bottom of my heart:

Thank You!

Thank you for the dedication to do such a long and arduous project!

Thank you for the beautiful art! I’ve always been a fan of DRDT’s unique style, and those animations always take my breath away, no matter how many times I see them.

Thank you for all the amazing characters you’ve brought to life! I love them all so much, I could thank you for each one individually.

… So I will.

•Thank you for Teruko! Because she’s one of my favorite protagonists from anything ever, as her intriguing and complex personality is always a joy to analyze.

Also, uh, thank you for the prosopagnosia rep. I probably have that too, but I would have never found out without DRDT. It really explained a lot about my life, so it can be said this series has changed me forever :D

•Thank you for Xander! It’s refreshing to see a character like him being so important to the story, with so many mysteries still surrounding him!

•Thank you for Charles! Because this nerd is one of the most likable and enjoyable characters I’ve seen in any fangan.

•Thank you for Ace! Because he manages to be both very funny and very interesting and complex whenever needed.

•Thank you for Arei! It’s always nice to see a ‘mean’ character with such well thought out motivations and such drive to change.

•Thank you for Rose! Her attitude always makes me feel calm when I think about her, and I’m really interested in seeing where her character and themes are going to go.

•Thank you for Hu! Another one I’m really intrigued by, I can’t wait to know more about her!

•Thank you for Eden! For showing that even “the nice one” characters can have depth and complexity. Also representation win, the nicest girl ever is a lesbian!

•Thank you for Nico! They are so, so interesting. I feel like I’m overusing the word “intriguing”, but they really are so fun to think about. Also representation win for the enbies! Love to see it.

•Thank you for Whit! Because he’s funny, and interesting, and there’s definitely something wrong with him it’s nice to have a character that doesn’t have any big issues :D

Just kidding! The reason I love DRDT so much is that everyone gets to be a little fucked up, as a treat!

And representation win! The coolest guy ever is bisexual!

•Thank you for J! She’s funny and cool and- you guessed it, intriguing. I am running that word to the ground, but it’s true for everyone!

•Thank you thank you thank you for Veronika!!! She’s so great. She’s fantastic. She always brings a smile to my face, she’s so perfect in every way shape and form. God I love her so much, I want her to go as insane as her crazy little heart desires. And more representation! Sorta jealous of the pansexuals who got this freak (affectionate).

•Thank you for David! How can a character be so complex, that you look at Literature Girl Insane and decide it needs more literary references to properly convey them? Well, David’s the answer, and geez. He’s just so fantastically written, it’s incredible. Another big win for the bisexual community imo.

•Thank you for Levi! He’s really cool, and everything about him is interesting.

•Thank you for Arturo! Because as much of a weirdo as he can be, his entire character is just really, really interesting.

•Thank you for MonoTV! Because it’s funny and its personality has to be one of the most unique I’ve ever seen for mascot characters.

•Thank you for Mai! I mean, who?

•Thank you for Unnamed Classmate! Because they’re really nice and I can’t wait to see where they go.

And of course…

•Thank you, so much, for Min! She may very well be my favorite character from anything ever. Everything about how she’s written is phenomenal, her personality and struggles are so well developed, I could gush about her for hours! She means so much to me, I can’t properly describe how in love I am with her.

Thank you for the laughs! From the arm wrestling scene, Charles getting obliterated by MonoCredits, “milk tastes good”, Teruko tripping over Nico… Not to mention the greatest joke ever conceived: the bathroom investigation. I laughed for a solid minute or two when I first watched it, just replaying the funniest thing ever on loop.

The Q&As were also really funny, and I never really had an issue with the way the were written. I fully understand and support if you decide not to do them ever again, but they were fun while they lasted. From Nico’s favorite ice cream flavor being “the flavor”, to us forgetting people can have friends aside from Mai I mean who, all the way to that time you directed us to inform ourselves on what a pant pocket is.

Thank you for the tears! Because I still can’t watch Min’s final hug without my chest hurting, a lot. Even some of the frames from the Sleepy MV, that beautiful piece of art, get me to tear up just looking at them.

Thank you for the mysteries! From the murders which are really fun to theorize about, to everything related to Mai Akasaki and the multiple source code secrets. And don’t even get me started on the LGI MV, that insanity (affectionate) has been eating at my brain ever since it released. Everything about it is fantastic, even the things we still haven’t solved.

Where’s footnote 8, dev?! Did you put it in your pant pockets?! (/j)

Also, tangentially, thanks for introducing me to the LGI album. It’s a really good album ^^

Thank you for the research you’ve put into everything! Things like Ace’s talent causing his eating disorder are really appreciated, they show a genuine care and love for the project.

Thank you for all the little details you might think no one notices, but that we love to see! Things like the first Nonstop Debate ending in perjury, Teruko listing Xander as one of the people whose secret was unrevealed, David’s eyes being different in his genuine breakdowns to his little thing in Ep 11, strychnine not being listed with the other custom weapons because Charles made the list, the note Xander received having a proper full message which has been obscured (I can only make out “it is” at the bottom, but it’s clear the message is there), the charm on Teruko’s thing-that’s-probably-a-MonoPad-but-may-be-something-else being the same as Unnamed Classmate’s phone charm, all the interesting details in the character profiles, among so many other things.

This also includes details revealed on Q&As. Arei being ambidextrous, Teruko liking “girly” clothing, Xander having a weak sense of taste, Ace having 9 siblings, Veronika’s earring being related to a friend, all the favorite and least favorite colors and ice cream flavors. As well as the few things we know about people like Felicity and Elliot that made the community fall in love with them for no apparent reason. It just makes them all seem so human!

Thank you to the voice actors, as well! They’ve all done such an amazing job, no exceptions! In particular, Veronika’s unhinged laughter, the dialogue after Ace’s almost murder, Min’s last words, David’s speech post the “guilty as charged” incident… but it’s all fantastic, all the characters are voiced really well.

And thank you for so much more! If I kept going, this post would never end. DRDT just means more to me than any finite number of words could ever convey. Without your work, the days pass by tastelessly /ref. So, one last time for the road:

Thank you for everything!

(God I love the Sleepy MV so much. It’s so pretty!!!)

#drdt #danganronpa despair time #fanganronpa #drdtdevappreciation #drdt spoilers

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dollypopup · 14 days

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So, I wasn't gonna post anything about this, honestly, but because I was directly asked, here's my 2 cents!

First, I want to thank you for saying you trust me with this! I'm also on the ace-spectrum, and I'm a queer, bisexual woman, so I do have a lot of empathy with you and everyone else who was down for queer rep.

(Also, I do not have Anon turned on for my asks. I absolutely respect your privacy, but I've been harassed before, and if people want to come at me, they can do it with their whole chest. Similarly, if people want to come TO me, I'd love to be friends!) I want to start off with the fact that whilst I understand that you believe the article, I don't. Call it the skeptic in me, or my media literacy classes during my grad program or denial or what have you, but we live in a huge era of misinformation. A tabloid is not likely to be any kind of reliable source, and a random reddit user even less so. It's like making a balloon full of pudding and having a clown say it's helium. We're not going to know until the needle pops it. Surely, no one would ever lie on the internet.

That being said, as much as I yearned and wanted for Demi Colin to be confirmed, it's not set in stone, and so it couldn't have been taken away from us. Honestly, even being ace-spec, a lot of the HC of Demi!Colin started putting a bad taste in my mouth when I realized that a lot of this predominately cishet fandomw as doing it as a means of keeping Colin 'pure' for Penelope, and that struck me as incredibly acephobic. Sure, they were HCing him as one of us. . .but not because it fit with his character or provided a rich and interesting arc for him to explore, but more so that his identity was an extension of their hopes and wants for Penelope. It wasn't for him as a character, but for him as a prize. And that made me so very sad, so my dream of Demi!Colin died when I saw that happening so frequently. Us Demi and Ace folks deserved better than that, and we continue to.

Either way, I think you are absolutely allowed to feel your disappointment! This is a frustration safe zone! There was a lot of potential this season, especially for Colin, that I feel has been dropped. But even IF that article contains some truth (big, heavy IF). . .idk, I see it through the lens that lot of us Demi folks have had sex. Even no strings attached sex. I know I have. Was I disassociated from it for a lot of the time? Yeah. Was it satisfying? No. But did it happen? It did. I chose to take part in it, and they were experiences that helped me grow. And I am no less Demi for it! IF this article is true, instead of us freaking. . .I feel like it could tell us a lot about Colin's character.

He is a man who has had, largely, no good role models in his life. Not in this regard. Who does he have to guide him? Anthony? Literally said he should have taken Colin to brothels. Benedict? Hell, he had a threesome himself. Why wouldn't Colin be out here thinking 'This is what Men do, this is what my brothers do, why not?' Colin is young. He's 23 still trying to find himself. And the entire idea of 'oh, he's a nerd! no way he's had threesomes' lol, like nerds aren't kinky? Come on, I'm a nerd and I've done way more than people would assume I have. He was traveling for months, and I think this really isn't as huge a deal as we're making it out to be. I ship Polin exclusively, and I love the idea of them having their firsts together, but I'm also not angry otherwise. In my mind, he's still demi. Just like he'll always be ND, even if it isn't confirmed.

Sidenote, o want to touch on something that is somewhat unrelated to your post, but something I'm seeing a lot is the whole 'it's dehumanizing for him to watch two women!' or 'it's lesbian fetishization!'

from the very bottom of my heart, as a gay woman, people saying that can eat me. These are the same people who didn't care about any of our representation, before. They didn't care about having lesbian characters, didn't bring them up. Now that it affects their (largely) het pairing, and specifically Colin as a perfect prize in a pairing he has largely been denied a narrative within, we're talking pieces and pawns for their discontent? No, I refuse. There are legitimate criticisms that can and should take place about Bridgerton's lack of care toward wlw, and especially that our only representation may actually just be a lesbian performance for the sake of a threesome, but this is not a criticism on COLIN. It is a criticism on the PRODUCTION. Because if we had queer women in the series before, it wouldn't be an issue. However, I refuse to have my sexuality used as a 'ewwww gross! look what they're doing! isn't that soooo wrong?' gotcha moment by people who just don't like his character. If we're gonna have a conversation about it, we should have a conversation about it based purely on our actual desire to protect and care for queer women. Not using us as stepping stone soap boxes to prop up an argument.

Queer people are really done dirty in the Polin fandom, and this is proof of it. Demi!Colin is important to me, and he continues living on in my heart and my fics, and even if it turns out that he's fucked up and down the Amalfi coastline and watched live porn, that won't make him less demi to me, personally. Ace spec people's experience with sex is all unique, and honestly, watching seems very in line with Colin's character. I don't agree with peeps who call it weird or gross that he watches porn.

This is an incredibly puritanical fandom, and I find it more and more evident as I spend time in it. The entire 'suffering' 'penance' 'deserve her' 'grovel' train was already very clear in that regard, and then people only wanting Colin to be a virgin so he remained 'pure' and 'untarnished' (legit takes I had to read with my own eyeballs) for Penelope was so Catholic on main that it made me feel insane.

Us ace-spec peeps deserve to be and should have the space to be upset at any developments taking place! We also deserve to be free from people doing pseudo pearl clutching and hiding behind feminist and queer-friendly language to disguise that they're just upset that Colin is getting anything at all in his storyline that centers around him and his own discovery outside of Penelope. Even if he isn't a virgin, he can absolutely still be Demi, Anon! And I hope that brings you some comfort.

Am I a fan of the threesomes foursomes moresomes and live porn speculation? No, not particularly. Am I livid furious throwing up about it? Also no. This series has betrayed me and disappointed me in so many ways, but so has the fandom. I guess I'm accustomed to it, now. But I want to reiterate that we should not believe everything that is posted. Some rando on a reddit forum confirming a tabloid article does not investigative journalism and peer review and confirmed sources make.

But in the event that the season does disappoint and gives us some baffling storylines: this is where fanfic can be such a comfort. It's how a story lives on in perpetuity. I've written trans!Colin and queer!Colin and demi!Colin and virgin!Colin and bdsm!Colin and all sorts! We can give we everything we want. It's our playground and it's meant to be fun.

But over my dead body will I believe a Sun UK article lol

#tagging because i was asked to make it public #polin #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #hot takes are hot i guess?

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