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#and now alas I have all these emails.
notbecauseofvictories · 8 months
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Am about to start 4 back-to-back meetings with a vicious head cold, half a cup of coffee, a sleep schedule all over the place, and the dregs of everything I took last night to get my incredibly stupid, disease-ridden body to calm down for five seconds.
Pray for me.
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ereborne · 3 months
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What is a Monday? A miserable little pile of obligations.
semester turnover restructure
generate/send out error reporting
figure out how to separate out unique counts
create polite reply to Massive Dick Move email
finish the bad book >:(
bò kho (not an obligation. dinner)
laundry
lizard bath
#yapping tag#I spent my weekend trying to sleep and now all my chores are due today and I wanna complain. grump grump grump whine.#the semester turnover restructure actually is a pet project so that part I like! I wish I could take my time with it though#the error reporting is. well it's easy to generate (it's actually running now) and it's tedious but uncomplicated to send out#but then I'm going to spend the rest of the day getting passive-aggressive responses from everybody#in a just world my coworkers would respond to careful itemized lists of all their fuckups with 'thank you Alexis you're so helpful#we really appreciate you flagging our mistakes two weeks before the system final-saves them forever into stone. have a cookie!'#but alas#if I'd been any less stressed and frantic when I first established the error reporting I'd have set up a separate address to send them from#write up some template emails and let the reporting all come out of the mythical 'automatic system thing'#--every 'automatic system thing' in our college is me or IT on my behalf. even the people who hired me for this don't seem to realize#if only I'd known from the beginning that nobody would ever connect me and my systems! I'd be exploiting the shit out of it--#the unique counts is going to be a headache. no idea how I'm going to structure the coding for it. might be fun to invent? we'll see#the Massive Dick Move email response also will be an invention. 'hello Mr Massive Dick I am karma here to smite you' but polite#the bad book >:( I don't want to read any more of but the deal I made with my friend is he sends me free books and I report back#we did not discuss a special 'get out of book free' card for when the main character is a godawful shit sibling. (should've done though)#beef stew is good! mostly it's on the list so I don't forget to set the timers#laundry and lizard bath can wait until tomorrow if they must but they shouldn't wait any longer than that. lizard and I will get stinky
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skater-brain · 2 years
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✨︎ Beat definitely falls for scam emails all the time. Does not have critical thinking skills to wonder why he’s getting unsolicited messages from Hot Singles In Your Area or how he won a contest he never entered from a store he never shopped at.
✨︎ Thankfully he doesn’t really read most of his emails anyway, unless it’s from someone he knows or he’s expecting an important one, but if it made it through the spam filter and had a snappy subject like:
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✨︎ he’d just be like “Holy shit free stuff, of course you can have my credit card number”.
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thekittenkait · 1 year
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i am so confused
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joels-shitty-puns · 6 months
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I'm gonna make a request again (sorry your last one was too good for me not to ask again) but this time for a jealous Joel! Maybe the reader and him have been friends for a while and she's oblivious to his flirting and she finally lands a date? How it goes from there can be up to you! I just love the jealous and possessive trope.
The Jealousy Bug
Pairing: Jealous!Joel Miller x f!Reader
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Hi!! I'm so sorry this took me so long to write, but thank you for the request!! I hope you like it!! I got a lil carried away... hope its not too much smut.
~~~~~
(Reader and Joel live in Jackson, amid the apocalypse)
Word count: 6.8K (oof)
Warnings: 18+ only, MDNI!! Smut smut smut. P in V sex (likely unprotected but not specified. Its an apocalypse, yo.), masturbation (m and f), sort of dubcon? voyeurism?? sorta?, kissing, talk of genitals and arousal, horny behavior. Explicit language and mean names. Alcohol. Violence: infected, guns, punching, mention of a knife. Joel is kind of a jerk sometimes. Possessive. Mentions of loss and grief (all within S.1 of TLOU). I haven't played part II yet so we're just gonna ignore what we know happens there. Joel and Ellie are happy in Jackson. Joel and Reader are friends and sort of neighbors. Clueless idiots in love. A total asshole of a guy in the town. Lil bit of fluff/romance? Mention of bugs (pill bugs), but not in a gross way. If I missed anything, please let me know, and I apologize!
Other Stuff: Avoidance of reader descriptors, other than reader is AFAB. Mentions of having hair on the noggin. She/her pronouns. Reader is clueless and also clumsy as hell. Reader also drinks coffee and alcohol. Italics indicate thoughts.
__________
It was around 4PM when you filed into the community center for another mandatory patrol meeting. It may be an apocalypse, but even now, you wished this meeting could have been an email instead. Alas, that was a thing of the past, and you were unfortunately stuck listening to the usual spiel about necessary vs. unnecessary items to raid… The importance of remembering to ABC, “Always Be Cautious,” plants that can and can't be eaten, etc.
You sat in your usual spot, the back row next to Joel Miller. A year ago when you first moved to this town, first started patrol, you came into this very room not knowing anyone. Friend groups stuck together, each of the two front rows filled, yet a few empty spaces here and there. Instead, you walked towards the back of the room. A handsome man, who you soon learned was named Joel, sat by himself, three rows back, behind the last full aisle. He was alone. The whole aisle of chairs was empty. He sat with his arms crossed, and you could tell based on his posing that he was not the social type. 
You were feeling a bit nervous, having finally found a sort of civilization in this mess, and hoping the people of Jackson accept you and not just shoot you, like most camps do when they see unknown faces. Unsure where to sit, you continued to head towards the back, slightly drawn to the gorgeous gray-haired man in the last row. Not wanting to intrude, you sat at the far end from Joel. You could feel his eyes on you as you sat, but you didn't dare look over and make eye contact. Years of survival instincts have told you that, especially when someone doesn't want to be bothered.
_____
When you first walked into the room, Joel looked up. He sat in the back row, as usual, not wanting to get close to anyone. However, even if he did, nobody gave him the time of day. They have heard stories of what he’s done, they have seen him around town, often grumbling about something. They could tell he wanted to be left alone and they had no interest in testing how badly he wanted to be left alone.
Joel found it easier to not form connections. Tommy kept telling him to make friends, come around more, socialize in the town. But Joel had learned over the years why making connections never ends well. All he has is Tommy and Ellie, and neither of those were his initial decision, but Tommy is his only family, and somehow he let himself care for Ellie.
But when Joel saw you… there was a flash of longing. He saw you smile gently at Tommy with a small wave. He could see you shrink walking to your seat past the cliques. You were beautiful, and if it were pre-pandemic, you'd be the exact type he'd probably take interest to.
But those days are over.
Or… so he thought.
He set his eyes back down on his hands in his lap, avoiding eye contact with you when you sat down at the end of the row from him.
Why did she sit so far away? Am I that horrible to be around? His heart questioned.
You don't want to be near people anyway. Good she sat far away. Leave me alone. His brain tried to argue.
Tommy droned on and on, the meeting nearing an hour by now, and you could feel Joel’s eyes on the side of your face every few minutes. You don't know why he kept staring, but it made you feel nervous. Did you have something on your face or clothes? Did you smell bad?
Tommy knew his brother well, sometimes more than Joel likes to admit out loud, and as he talked, he took note of Joel’s staring. At first his expression looked confused, maybe irritated or disgusted. Then it looked slightly… disappointed. But he kept stealing glances your direction, and so with a smirk, Tommy assigned the two of you to be on patrol together. Joel questioned his reasoning afterward, but he knew there was no point arguing with his brother.
After that day, you patrolled together. You both went to the bar with the group after meetings. You sat closer and closer to Joel. You managed to get some words out of him, and he listened to you chatter on. But it was when you brought him a cup of coffee before patrol one morning that he finally let down his guard. His heart had betrayed his defenses.
“What's this?” He asked, gruffly.
“Coffee, Joel…” you replied with a joking eye roll. “It's black. I know you don't like anything in it.”
He took a sip, shocked to taste that you actually knew how he took his coffee. “How did you know that?”
“I notice things Joel.” You patted his shoulder, walking towards the group.
_____
Now, a year later, the two of you were very close friends. You still surprised him with things you remembered or noticed, but much to his chagrin, the one thing you didn't pick up on were his advances. He'd call you pet names, be sweet to you, treat you like a gentleman, flirt a little, and it was like talking to a robot. You were clueless.
Tonight's meeting finally ended, the large group heading outside to the chill fall air. “You wanna get drinks with the patrol squad?” you asked Joel. 
“Wouldn't miss it,” he winked at you, putting his leather jacket on his shoulders.
Although you went as a group, ultimately you and Joel spent most of the nights in your own little bubble, occasionally making space in your circle for Tommy, or Maria if she joined.
Tonight, the two of you sat at the bar, the patrol group spread throughout the room at different tables. Joel excused himself to use the restroom, and while he was gone, Jimmy, one of the other patrol members approached you. Hurrying before Joel returned, he flirted and asked you out on a date. You told him you'd think about it, that you weren't sure if you were ready for a relationship after years of caution.
Not technically a lie, you thought. Although you really just weren't ready for a relationship because your heart was already taken by your handsome best friend. 
Joel returned just in time to see Jimmy walking away. “What did he want?” Joel grumbled. “Ah nothin, just wanted to say hi while getting a drink,” you lied. Joel accepted this answer and the two of you drank into the night. At the end of the evening, you seemed pretty drunk. Jimmy offered to walk you home, but before you had a chance to reply, Joel replied for you.
“I'll take her home, thanks.” He bit, turning you away from Jimmy. “I don't like the idea of that boy walkin’ you home. Don't trust ‘im. ‘Specially not when you're in this condition,” he wrapped an arm around you, shuffling you toward the door.
“You don't think I can handle myself, Joel?” You asked him, pulling away, a little bit irritated at him treating you like a weakling. “I seem to do just fine on patrol,” you argued.
“I know that, sugar. I didn't mean it like that. I just don't trust that guy. Heard how he goes through women. Don't want him trying’ anything with you,” he brushed his hand over your hair, causing you to soften at his words and actions.
You gasped lightly. “Is THE Joel Miller… jealous?” You knew he wasn't, but why not test the waters?
“What? Jealous? Of what? No ‘m not.” he balked. “Just lookin’ out for you…”
“Mmhm… you just wanna be the only big strong man walking me home, huh?” You teased, tripping over your own feet. 
Joel caught you in his arms. “Big strong man, huh? ‘S that what you think of me?” 
Shit… did I say that? You panicked. Maybe I'm more drunk than I thought…
Deciding to tease it off, you replied, “well you do always seem to catch me when I fall…” with a wink.
Falling in more ways than one… you thought, frustrated.
He rubbed his neck with the hand not holding you upright. You could almost see a pink tinge to his cheeks.
No, that has to be the lights playing tricks on my eyes… you thought. No way Joel Miller was blushing at your words.
“I kinda have to, ya big klutz. Practically a liability. I oughta tell Tommy to add a safety section on patrolling with you,” he bantered.
“Ah, shut up” you laughed with a push, causing yourself to lose balance instead of Joel. He just gave a knowing look, causing you both to laugh as you continued walking, now side by side instead of him holding you up.
After a few moments of silence, you spoke up. “You know, I could've walked myself home, Joel,” you stumbled, giggling.  
“Whoa there, sweetheart.” He wrapped his arms around you again, propping you up. “Don't worry about it. Let's just get you home. You've had way too much to drink.”
“You're so sweet Joel,” you pouted at him, booping his nose. “Joelly Joel.” You giggled. “Jolly Joelly.” Another giggle. “I dunno why people think you're so grumpy. I think you're just a big teddy bear,” you closed your eyes, leaning your head on his shoulder while he stumbled forward, trying to keep you upright.
“Who says I'm grumpy, darlin’?” He tilted his head towards you, smirking. “The whole town, silly. Silly Joelly. Joely-poly.” You gasped abruptly, causing Joel to jerk and turn to face you. “What? What is it?” His hand reached for his knife on his hip. Old habits die hard.
“Joely-poly!!” You squealed. “Awe! Roly-polies. Remember those!? I used to love them when I was little.” You pouted. “Before this whole world went to shit.”
Joel thought back to the little pill bugs, playing in the dirt with them when he was younger. Teaching his own daughter about them. His heart aches for what he lost, but he also thinks of Ellie. He bets she would love the little bugs too.
“That's a cute nickname for you,” you smiled. “They're so cute. Just,” you booped his nose. “Like.” Boop. “You,” you wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him tight. Another gasp from your lips.
He flinched again. “Darlin’, if you don't quit that I swear-”
“Joeeeel!” You pouted. “Do you think the roly-polies all died off with the infection!?” Your eyes welled up.
“Oh, sweetheart, don't cry. There's probably still some out there. Bugs could get cordyceps long before the fungus attacked humans, and they were still alive back then.” You looked up into his deep brown eyes through your fluttering lashes. “You really think so?” You leaned in, placing both your hands on his cheeks. His breath caught in his chest. “Darlin’, you drank a lot tonight-” you cut off his sentence, running your hands down his neck, resting your palms on his chest. His heart was beating a mile a minute. If he didn't know better, he'd worry his heart would leap out and fly away. 
Your eyes lit up and you slid off his chest, lowering clumsily to the ground and gripping his sides for balance. You were now on your knees, eye level with his crotch, hands on his hips. His breath was ragged and his stomach full of twirling butterflies. “Wh-what do you think you're doin’?” He asked nervously. You looked up at him with big eyes, your hands slowly falling down from his hips to his thighs as you tried to balance yourself in your drunken state. He couldn't help but feel his pants begin to tent at the position you were in. He would never take advantage of you in your current state, but trying to ignore the desire brewing in his body after so many months of unrequited feelings was challenging. Did you finally see his advances for what they were? Feelings instead of friendliness?
You grinned up at him, finally regaining balance. “I'm gonna go look for ‘em!” you turned and waddled away on your knees, heading a couple feet away, towards a patch of flowers off the path.
She just needed to use me as a ladder, or what…? Joel thought to himself with a sigh and shaking his head in disappointment, his sexual frustration at its breaking point.
You crawled forward, falling onto your hands and knees in the soft dirt. Joel quickly stepped forward to try and grab you but realized, despite your lack of grace, you meant to do that. “Ugh… darlin', it's dark out here. It's cold. You're drunk. Let's get you home.”
“I'm looking for buggies, Joel!!” You leaned towards a leaf, arching downward so that your face was closer to the ground, ass up. 
“Oh, have mercy…” Joel groaned under his breath, his eyes drifting downward. Your ass was up in the air, facing him, the fabric of your dress having fallen forward towards your front. Your light pink panties were on full display for Joel, leaving little to his imagination in this position. Joel subtly adjusted his pants, looking up to the sky and shaking his head in a silent plea. 
You whined. “Joel, I don't see any.” You leaned farther forward, wiggling your butt somehow higher. Joel looked around, panicked at the thought that someone else might see you in this position. But luckily, you were close to your house and it was just the two of you out here. He turned back to you again. “I think it's time you get up and we go in-” you moved further forward, the streetlight shining above you and illuminating your ass. Joel tried to be a gentleman, but his eyes betrayed him. As he snuck another glance, he couldn't help but notice a little wet spot over the crotch of your panties. “In-inside…” he finished his sentence, words catching in his throat. He gulped, trying to divert his eyes. 
Taking a shaky breath and stepping forward, trying to ignore the throbbing need in his pants, he lightly grabbed your arm. “It's time to go sweetheart. The bugs are sleepin’ I think.” 
You looked at him and smiled mischievously. “I know, Joel,” you winked. Jumping up, you scampered towards your house, leaving Joel to wonder what the hell just happened.
“Woman's gonna be the death of me,” Joel muttered under his breath to himself. He caught up to you, just as you both approached your house. “Joel, I don't wanna go home. Can't I stay with you? And Ellie?” you batted your eyelashes at him. He rubbed his neck. “Ellie's with a friend tonight. But, you do have a point. You probably shouldn't be left by yourself in this state. Don't want you gettin’ hurt, or sick, and bein’ all alone.”
“Such a gentleman, Joel.” You touched his bicep, the two of you walking towards Joel's house across the street.
Hardly, he thought, grimacing at the reason he was aching in his trousers, feeling like an old creep, and a terrible excuse for a friend.
Once inside Joel's house, he gave you a baggy sleep shirt and a glass of water with some crackers to help with the alcohol. You changed, brushed your teeth with a spare toothbrush, and used the restroom. He let you have his bed, while he took the couch down the hall, scrunching his legs up to barely fit.
_____
Joel tried his hardest to ignore what he saw earlier and just go to bed, but the aching only continued, making it impossible to sleep. Sure that you must have fallen asleep by now, tucked away in his bed down the hall, he quietly reached into his pajama bottoms and boxers, pulling out his rock-hard penis. Even the mere touch of removing himself from his pants caused him to hiss, so worked up he could have cum just watching you bent over earlier.
He was a gentleman, but he was still a man, and one that hadn't been with a woman in a very long time. With as many people as he'd lost by one means or another, he'd told himself he wouldn't get close to anyone else. Sarah's mom. Sarah. Tess. Bill and Frank. Sam and Henry. He almost thought he had lost Tommy before Jackson, too. It was against his wishes that Ellie crawled her way into his heart, and then he almost lost her as well. He was beginning to think maybe it was him. He was cursed, doomed to have anyone he loved ripped away from him.
Which is why when you came to Jackson, he tried his best to ignore you. But you always greeted him, cheerful and sweet, like a little ball of sunshine that was somehow untarnished by the storm clouds of an apocalypse.
He was irritated to realize that he had made room in his heart for you. You caused an ache in his heart that yearned to be filled. A missing piece in his soul. A place for him to someday fit, tangled between sheets and loving words. It had been about a year since you moved to Jackson, and he still feared getting too close to you, yet he would try his hardest to woo you the way a gentleman should. Sweet nicknames, flirting, gentle touches. You never picked up on it. Whether or not you felt the same, he stupidly fell in love. Unsure if it was mutual, yet pretty sure it wasn't after all this time, he tried to ignore the dirty thoughts revolving around you when the late-night urges would hit him. Somehow it felt wrong.
But tonight, it was hard to avoid. Having you touch him. His face, his neck, his chest, his hips, his thighs. Kneeling eye level with his crotch. Slinking away, sticking your barely covered ass in the air, letting your wet panties be shown to him and only him. He couldn't get you out of his head as he stroked himself. First slowly, but then harder and faster, trying to reach his climax with the thought of him burying himself in that sweet spot underneath your wet underwear. How he longed to see you with his own eyes, begging for him.
He tried to be quiet, to keep himself hidden from you down the hall, but the noise of skin on skin grew slightly louder with each of his quiet moans and panting breaths that managed to slip from his lips. Imagining himself buried deep inside you, taking you from behind in the same position he saw you in earlier, imagining the tight grip around him and the slick noises he could only fantasize about. He could practically hear you moaning and sighing, the sound seeping from his subconscious to the living room. He pumped harder, swirling his thumb around the head, drooling with precum, as his climax grew closer. He could feel his strokes becoming less controlled and his balls pulling upward as he began to shoot load after load of white hot release up under his shirt onto his stomach. Stroking himself through it, he milked his last few ropes of cum out before laying back to catch his breath, slowly tucking himself back away in his pants.
Coming back to his senses, he realized the sounds of your moans and whimpers that he was imagining were still happening. Taken out of his fantasies when he finished, there was no reason for the sounds to still be in his head. Needing to grab a cloth from the linen closet down the hall anyway, he walked, nearing his bedroom door, and heard the unmistakable sound of you pleasuring yourself. Quietly, he padded down the hallway, closer to the door. He could tell you were trying to be quiet, but could still hear you, soft whimpers and pants, surrounded by wet schlick noises.
Fuck, he thought. He could feel himself already getting excited again, despite having just released a few minutes ago. He desperately wanted to join you in his bed, or at the least, stand by the door and listen to your sounds while pleasuring himself, but he wasn't going to be a creep, nor scare you to death. You were still his friend. Even if he did want to move the couch across the living room to hear you better.
_____
Meanwhile in Joel's room, you had tried to sleep. You really had. But tossing and turning, each roll causing your nose to be surrounded with his scent, you were thrown into a frenzy, like an animal in heat. Each smell of his cologne, shaving cream, deodorant, and natural body scent that you picked up from his bed sent a wave of arousal directly to your core. You wondered how many times he'd pleasured himself in this bed and how frequently. You wondered if he ever thought of you while doing it, imagining himself buried deep to the hilt inside of you, each drag of his cock more perfect than the last, much like you were imagining now.
You would be lying if you didn't say there were a lot of handsome men in Jackson. Granted, you had been without romance for a very long time, but still. Many of them were single, and some of them were very sweet and friendly. Yet for some strange reason, your heart had been drawn to Joel. The first moment you saw him, with his silvery curls and his grumpy face, his shining brown eyes and his patched beard, you were smitten. You were a bit disappointed that he seemed to be a massive grump, but despite what everyone said, he was always nice to you. Granted, you were always nice to him, so why should he be anything less, right?
He was always a total gentleman, calling you names like darlin’ and sweetheart, his southern drawl pulling you in like a lasso. His care for his unofficially-adopted daughter warmed your heart, and you could see he was a real family man from both their relationship, and the one he shared with his brother. It warmed your heart, especially when you befriended Tommy and Ellie, getting to hear them talk about Joel. Seeing the love they feel, even if they give him a hard time sometimes. You didn't see how people felt Joel was cruel or heartless, even with the stories you heard. Times were rough, and people did what they had to for survival. 
You were always too chicken to make a move, and you figured he wouldn't be interested anyway. Surely him calling you those names and being sweet with you was just his Southern gentlemanly nature, right? You were nice to him, he was nice to you. 
So tonight, when Jimmy, the local heartthrob in town, asked you on a date, you told him you'd think about it and let him know. Yeah, you claimed you weren't sure how you felt about relationships after all the world had become. Truth was, you wanted a last chance with Joel before throwing in the towel and settling for Jimmy.
Sure, Jimmy was handsome. Blonde hair, blue eyes, rugged, yet boyish. Several of the women in town had crushes on him, and he had had several of the women in town. You weren't clueless to the rumors about his playboy behavior. But it had been a while and well, you weren't getting any younger. It might be nice to have a partner, even if he did only want a short little fling. 
So throwing back a few drinks, you decided you needed the liquid courage to finally make a move at Joel. One last effort to get his attention. You still didn't want to say anything to him, lest it ruin your current friendship that had grown so strong, but you could certainly use your body to entice a little. Drinking just enough to be brave, yet not so drunk that you were completely out of it, you gave an impression you were much drunker than you were, and needed Joel to help you out. Jimmy had almost been the one to walk you home, to your disappointment, before Joel stepped in, seeming slightly irritated about Jimmy's offer.
Yet after practically waving your ass in his face, showing him your panties (which you were sure looked wet), being inches from his crotch at knee height, and hanging on him all the way home, to now sleeping in his house and his bed, you were quite sure he didn't feel the same. Obviously his gestures were pure gentlemanly charm if he didn't bite after tonight's show.
So you tried to sleep, still a little drunk, but getting drunker off his scent. You tried to ignore the ache between your legs but the thought of him in this bed, groaning as his hand pumped his member to completion, made you throb. Soaked and antsy, you finally gave in and stuck your hand under the waistband of your panties. You let your imagination run wild, picturing him taking you in this bed, bringing you to bliss more than once. You could practically hear him groaning and panting, the sound seeping from your subconscious to the bedroom.
Tomorrow you would likely tell Jimmy yes. But tonight, you would try your best to get Joel out of your system, one stroke of your fingers at a time. But as you finished, coming with a whisper of Joel's name under your breath, you could still hear the groans and pants from Joel. Climbing out of bed, you moved to the door, pressing your ear against it. You could just barely hear the sounds of him panting and groaning, intermittent with the fapping of skin on skin. Delightedly surprised, you listened harder, feeling your pussy drool at the thought. How desperately you wanted to go out into the living room and climb on top of him. But he might not want that… he probably just couldn't sleep. Probably nothing to do with the scene you put on earlier. So instead, you slinked back to his bed, opting for round two.
At some point, the two of you fell asleep, panting and writhing with the self-induced pleasure, and the sound of each other through the door.
_____
The next morning, you awoke, walking down the hall to see Joel in his pajama bottoms and no shirt, making coffee. Your eyes scanned his broad shoulders and back, naked and tan. Bringing you back to last night's events, you felt your breath catching in your chest. 
“M-morning” you stuttered out, nervously.
Joel jumped, having not heard you. He turned, greeting you with a good morning. A faint blush crept across his cheeks and he quickly turned his head to pour a cup of coffee, offering you some as well. Thanking him, the two of you sipped in silence, both stealing glances at the other and thinking of the night before. Both of you felt like you had a dirty little secret the other didn't know. 
“Thanks again for taking care of me last night,” you added. In more ways than one, you thought.
“Of course, darlin’. Couldn't have you walkin’ home all alone or getting sick in the middle of the night. You're always welcome here,” he smiled.
“Well, I guess I better head to my house now,” you sighed. “See you later at patrol?”
“Course. Take care, sugar.” He brushed his hand over your arm. That's new… you thought. But still, probably friendly, unfortunately.
____
Hours later, you show up to patrol, noticing Joel hasn't arrived yet. Still a few minutes early, you look at the map, thinking over the route. You felt a tap on your shoulder, and turned around to see Jimmy. 
“Hey, Jimmy,” you greeted, feeling slightly awkward. You assumed he probably wanted (and deserved) an answer. You rubbed your arm nervously, staring at the ground, wondering what to tell him. He was handsome, you thought, and you weren't getting anywhere with Joel. 
“Did you, uh” Jimmy scratched behind his ear, “give any more thought to that date?”
Geesh. Not a lot of thinking time here…
“I did,” you replied. “I think… My answer is yes. I'll go out with you.” You felt a pang of regret in your stomach, but you wanted a connection, and you just weren't getting that from Joel, despite what you wanted to think from last night.
Jimmy grinned. “Really?” He picked up your hand, holding it in his. “That's great. I know you have patrol today, but maybe Friday? I'll meet you at your house at 6?” 
“Sure,” you gave a small fake smile. “Sounds great.” He still held your hand, warm and soft and nothing like the rugged, large, callused hands of hard-working Joel. Although Joel has never held your hand, the times he's touched your arms, or held you up on your walk from the bar, he left a trail of goosebumps and butterflies in his wake, despite being warm to the touch.
Jimmy went to kiss your hand, just as Joel walked up. “What’s goin’ on here, huh?” He asked, seeming almost… angry, looking from Jimmy, to your connected hands, over to your face. “Joel,” Jimmy dropped your hand, giving Joel a curt nod.
“Jimmy..” Joel replied, teeth clenched. 
“I'll see you Friday,” Jimmy smiled at you, touching your shoulder before walking away.
“What did that little asshole want?” Joel growled.
“Geez Joel, chill out. What's your problem? I'm not allowed to talk to people?” You crossed your arms.
“I toldja last night. I don't trust that kid. Too busy sleepin’ around with the whole town. What's he talkin’ to you for?” Joel furrowed his brow, looking over at Jimmy across the room, now talking to some of the other patrolmen.
“Gosh Joel.. seriously what is wrong with you? First of all, he's hardly a kid. He's at least in his thirties. Second of all, everyone he's been with, I'm sure has been consensual, otherwise Tommy would have kicked him out of the town. And lastly, but probably more important. What do you mean “what is he talking to you for?” You mocked in a deep voice. “Like I'm the only option he has left? Like I'm not deserving of a man talking to me? Not that it’s any of your business, friend, but for your information, Jimmy is taking me on a date on Friday. So fuck off, Joel.” You started to stomp away angrily, grabbing your pack off the desk.
“The fuck he is,” Joel muttered under his breath, so quiet you didn't hear and grabbing his pack as well.
_____
Five hours. Five hours of riding in complete silence, checking out abandoned buildings in complete silence, and taking breaks in complete silence. Even your first patrol wasn't this quiet, and you couldn't help but feel like he was somehow angry at you.
As irritated as you were with him, not talking to him somehow felt worse. This wasn't like him. Is this the grumpy side everyone talks about? Is this Joel, the asshole you have yet to meet?
Feeling confused, your eyes started to cloud, slightly teary with anger and sadness, yet also a bit of dread at going out with Jimmy. You blinked your eyes, sorting through the abandoned drug store you and Joel were in.
Finding some condoms on a shelf, you threw them in your pack. “What're you doin’?” Joel asked. “Those can't be sold, didn't you pay attention to Tommy? They're rarely effective this old.”
“Yes I paid attention, Joel. I know they can't be sold. They're for me. I figured it's better than nothing,” you replied bitterly. “I have a date in a couple days, I want to be prepared,” you scowled. Joel’s jaw clenched, but he didn't say anything, instead turning to look the other direction of the aisle.
Crouched down to search the bottom shelf for other items, Joel was still turned away from you, keeping lookout on the other end of the aisle. 
You didn't even hear the stalker leap around the corner from the shadows and pounce on you. It opened its mouth, fungal strands spreading from its mouth towards your face. Pure fear pulsed through your veins.
“Joel!!!!!” You cried out, using all your strength to try and push the infected off of your body, but it was too strong. 
You screamed and kicked, struggling to break free, when Joel fired his shotgun, shooting the enemy in the head and immediately running over to you. Throwing the infected off of your body as if it was weightless, Joel scooped you into his arms. His lips moved but you heard nothing. Your ears rang, high pitched squeals from adrenaline, fear, shock, and the bang of the shotgun.
Joel pawed over your body, roughly inspecting you for bites and wounds in a frenzy. When he didn't find any, he held you in his arms again. “It's okay baby, it's okay. You're alright sweetheart. Come back to me, it's okay. You're okay.” Your hearing must have returned. He rocked you, tears welling from your eyes and his. “You're okay. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.” He kissed your ear and the side of your head, still rocking you in a hug, sitting on the floor, inches from the now-dead infected. The two of you needed to get out of here, but neither of you could move yet.
Finally you spoke. “Why are you sorry Joel?” You asked with a sniffle. You wrapped your arm around his back, the other hand finding the back of his head, gripping his curls gently.
“I'm sorry for how I've been actin’ all day. I'm sorry I didn't see that stalker before he attacked. I'm sorry for being so possessive earlier. I'm sorry,” he held you tighter.
You pulled back to look into his eyes. “Joel, you couldn't have heard or seen that stalker. That's what they do best. You saved me and that's all that matters. As for earlier, you were being an asshole, and it did really hurt my feelings. All this time people have said you're such a jerk, and I didn't see it,” you pulled away from his grip, “but today I did.” You looked at your lap. “Don't I deserve to go on a date? Don't I deserve to have someone love me?” You picked at the hem of your pants, avoiding his eye contact.
“Oh, darlin', I'm so sorry. I never meant for you to feel that way. I just - you deserve something real, not a hookup like that guy wants. I know his type. He'll sleep with you and toss you aside. You deserve to be treated like a lady.”
You snorted. “Yeah, Joel. That's how things are nowadays, too. Gentleman just waiting to sweep me off my feet. Shit, you literally just saved me from near-death, something that happens all the time today, and yet you're saying I deserve love? To find romance? Yeah, right.”
Joel didn't say anything. He just looked into your eyes, lips pursed and moving to the side in thought. His eyes drifted to your lips and back up to your sight.
You continued. “I don't even like Jimmy,” you said quietly. “I like someone else, but I just got tired of waiting and wanted some kind of connection. Even if it's just a night in bed.” At the last part of your sentence, Joel grimaced, almost in pain. And then he thought.
“Wait,” he sat back a little, scanning your face. “Who do you like?” 
You gulped. Why not a little more adrenaline? “Well, it was you, until you started acting like an asshole. But I realized you probably didn't feel the same way a while ago. Especially after I practically threw myself at you last night.”
“Threw yourself at me last night? What are you talkin’ about? You were drunk,” Joel answered.
“I wasn't that drunk, Joel. My movements were pretty planned. The placement of my touches on your body. My ass angled up in your direction. I wanted you,” you added, pointedly.
Joel looked like he was solving a complicated math problem. “So you… last night when you… I heard you, in bed, pleasurin’ yourself. Were you… thinking about me?”
You looked up at him in shock and panic. “You heard me?” You asked in a frantic whisper.
“Yeah, I uh… I did. I got up to get a towel and heard your uh… sounds” he cleared his throat.
“I guess I should tell you then that I heard you too,” you said with a smirk.
Joel swallowed, hard. “Y-ya heard me?”
“Yep” you replied, popping your lips on the p sound.
Joel had nothing to lose at this point. “I was thinking about you,” he proclaimed. “Thinkin’ bout that wet spot on your panties when you flashed your ass in the air. Wishin’ I was buried inside you.” He ran his hand across your thigh.
Your breathing picked up. “I was thinking about you too. Wishing you'd bust through that door and take me in your bed, running my nails down your back as we came together…” you mimicked the motion with your fingers down his jacket-clad back.
“Fuck,” he hissed, eyes closing. You glanced down at the noticeable bulge in his jeans. “I like you too, I just never thought you felt the same. Y’never seemed to pick up on any of my sweet talkin’ or my names for ya.”
“I just figured you were being nice,” you replied, glancing back into his eyes.
“You should know by now, I'm only nice to you,” he growled. “I'm sorry I ruined that today,” he glanced at your mouth, licking his lips. “Was just jealous. Want you all for myself,” he stroked your thigh again.
You sighed at the feeling, pulling him by his collar to kiss him deeply. The kiss was frantic and rough, both of you trying to get as much of each other as possible, a year of build-up boiling at the surface. Teeth clashed and tongues danced and you pulled each other closer, grasping at clothes and skin. 
The two of you broke the kiss, needing a gasp of air. You started to take off your shirt when Joel stopped you. “Whoa, darlin'. I want you just as bad, but not here,” he gestured to the old building. “It's dangerous, not to mention gross in here. I wasn't kidding when I said you deserve romance,” he stood, pulling you to your feet. “We're about a 20 minute ride from base, let's head home. Make your fantasy of fuckin’ in my bed come true,” he winked, giving a smack to your ass. 
_____
The 20 minute ride felt never-ending as you both stole glances at each other, your panties still wet with arousal, and him still sporting the tent in his pants, which was hard to miss. 
Finally making it back to the stables, you both quickly undressed the horses and put gear away, about to head out of the barn when Jimmy and his partner rode up. “Hey, babe,” he called to you. It sounded wrong from his mouth. Joel tensed at your side.
Dismounting his horse, Jimmy strolled over to you. “Hey Jimmy, I was thinking. I don't think I want to go on that date after all. I'm sorry, I just don't feel the same way.”
“What?” Jimmy asked in disbelief.
“I know, I'm sorry if I hurt you. I- I like someone else. I just didn't think they felt the same way,” you replied sheepishly.
“Fuck you,” he spat.
“What?” You were in disbelief.
“Fuck you, bitch. One of the few women in this town who won't fuckin’ put out. I was even gonna take you on some shitty date before I got you into bed, and now you make a fool of me? Nah, I don't think so,” he stalked towards you angrily. 
You stepped back, worried what he might do, but Joel stepped in first, nailing a punch at Jimmy's nose. “Don't you dare talk to her like that,” Joel yelled.
Tommy came running in, hearing the commotion. After hearing what happened, it was decided that Jimmy wouldn't be welcome in this town any longer.
Satisfied, you grabbed Joel's hand. “Why don't I show you who I really belong to?” You looked up at him, biting your lip.
“Lead the way, baby.” He pushed you forward, smacking your ass.
The two of you stumbled into his house, kissing with little regard for objects. Luckily, Ellie was still at a friend's house. The door slammed closed and you kissed furiously, undressing as you walked. Finally you reached his bedroom and fell onto the bed, where he made all your fantasies of the night prior come true. The two of you enjoyed the taste of each other's mouths, kissing and licking, while he pounded into you, leaving you breathless and screaming his name as you both came.
“That was even better than I imagined,” you sighed, rolling over onto his chest.
“That's my girl,” he cooed, kissing your head and rubbing your back.
“Mine,” he whispered.
707 notes · View notes
lazyjellyfish300 · 3 months
Text
The Stuffed Rabbit🐇💌💕
Miguel O'Hara x AFAB Reader s/o
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Happy Valentine's Day, Miguel Nation! 🌹💌
Synopsis: One of my Valentine's Day specials. The other one is posted now too. Woot woot! Bringing you and Miguel back from the same universe as In a Vial Around Your Pretty Little Neck. It's your second Valentine's Day together. And all you want is to go to Build A Bear. You plan an emotional surprise for him too that you hope he'll love. The quote: "Grief is love with nowhere to go," by Jamie Anderson helped inspire this. Word count: 2.7k
TW: Minors DNI since this one has suggestive content(but no smut), little angst, grief, other than that just Valentine's fluff.
-----
"Tienes demasiados peluches, mi vida." (You have too many stuffed animals, my life.) Miguel smirks at you as he stands in your kitchen, loading the Keurig with his cup of Joe for the morning.
"Well, I need more." You say firmly, crossing your arms.
Miguel shakes his head. "The fact that they take up nearly the entire new shelf I bought you is crazy on its own. You sure you don't want a fancy dinner, maybe a little vacation, just you and I? Movie? Some earrings?" He tickles your earlobe and you swat him away playfully.
"No way. Build-a-Bear or bust."
Miguel smiles, won over by your persistence. "Well, it seems I don't stand a chance against you this time." He sighs and pours the steaming coffee into a mug, blowing on the hot drink lightly. "I'll take you to Build-A-Bear, if I can choose the restaurant we go to afterwards?"
You press your fingertips together like a villain making a deal.
"Very well, O'Hara. You drive a hard bargain, but alas, I shall concede this time and let you have jurisdiction over our choice of dining."
Miguel shakes his head. "I'll do without the theatrics."
You walk up to him, craning your neck to look up at him and lean forward into his chest with both hands on either side of his waist. "Let me be dramatic in peace. You know I can't stand surprises when it comes to food."
Miguel sets his mug down and holds your face in his hands. "Are my restaurant picks really that terrible?"
You suck your cheeks in like a guppy and Miguel leans in to give you a little peck. "Nah. But preferably not Subway again."
Miguel's face curls into a smirk and he tickles your sides which you start giggling in response, trying to to push him off. "Thought you wanted to go to the place where they 'make the food in front of you'?" he says teasingly.
"Stahhhppp it!! I- *giggles* I-I meant teppanyaki, genius! Not freakin Subway."
Miguel starts kissing your cheeks, alternating between each one, causing your stomach to flutter.
"My apologies, baby...you're right, I'll make sure to pick somewhere extra special this time."
His hands slip under your shirt, making you get a little weak and your eyes droop.
"Mmm-promise...?"
He gives you a soft lingering kiss, and mumbles quietly against your lips, "Te lo prometo, cariño." (I promise you, dear)
-----
Your plan worked. Now you just had to get some help from Lyla. You wanted your own stuffed animal for Valentine's Day of course, but you wanted something extra special made for Miguel that you could give him at dinner, too.
You stood in front of Miguel's desk with Lyla, drumming your fingers anxiously as she was trying to download and email the file you were needing for his present before he returned from his lunch break.
"How much longer, Lyla?...." You asked, trying to keep the impatience in your tone in check.
"Almost there, almost there....." Lyla chided, jumping from one end of the holographic screen to the other. "Annnnnnd.....okay I sent it! He's gonna cry when he sees it dude, I hope you're ready."
You smile and then jump when you hear Miguel's voice. "Ready for what? And what are you doing here in the middle of the day?"
You whirl around and Lyla dissipates, trying play it off like both of you weren't up to anything.
"Nothing! Lyla was just saying uhm...she was just making sure I'm ready for tomorrow because apparently you chose a really fancy place for dinner this time." You grin, your heart racing in your chest.
Miguel gives you a suspicious look, but it turns into a smile as he scoops you up, planting you on his desk with your legs on either side of him. He gives your thighs a little squeeze and looks at the screens behind you as though he didn't buy your excuse entirely. "Hmmm...I did choose a fancy place for dinner tomorrow. I just hope Lyla didn't spoil it already..."
Lyla regenerates next to Miguel's ear. "Secret's still secure, boss!"
You nod, backing her up. "Honestly, she didn't tell me anything. Even though I was begging."
Miguel smiles and presses his forehead against yours. "Someone's impatient."
"I'm just excited! That's all..." You lean in , putting your hands on Miguel's shoulders and he helps hoist you back down.
He nods. "Trust me, you'll love it. But, dare I ask what you and Lyla were actually up to before I walked in?" He gives you a little smirk as he moves past you, setting up his workstation once again.
You quickly avert your gaze, doing your best to shield your true intentions. "Um...well, maybe there is gonna be a little surprise for you tomorrow too." You look up at him and he has a warm smile on his face.
"Really? Surprise f'me, hmm?" He pulls you back in by your hips.
You smile and rest your hands on his shoulders. "Yep. But key word: surprise. So you won't get to find out until tomorrow."
Miguel nods and ruffles your hair. "Very well, as you wish, ma'am." He calls out to you as you head for the exit. "I'm gonna try and guess what it is all day now!"
You turn your head and shoot one last teasing smile his way, "Love you baby!"
"Yo también te amo."(I love you too)
------
Next day, Valentine's Day
You and Miguel walk arm in arm into Build a Bear. You smile giddily and run up to the bins with all the different animals to choose from. Miguel smiles and stays a few paces behind you. He sees a cute couple with their little daughter and it pulls at his heart strings a bit. He looks around the little shop at the other families, and little kids running around and it creates a lump in his throat. He was afraid of this happening today. Valentine's Day and any other holidays would always end up reminding him of his sweet little girl every time going forward. It was bittersweet in its own way.
You were like a shower of rain upon the aching desolate plains of his heart, bringing with you a special happiness he never thought he'd be able to feel again. He fiddled with the ring on his pinky that held your blood in it as he watched you.
One of these days he wouldn't keep you waiting any longer.
He's ripped out of his thoughts when you call for him.
"Baby, I'm having a hard time choosing which one I want."
Miguel walks over to you where you have a yak in one hand and a red teddy bear in the other.
"Get em both." Miguel says, kissing your forehead.
"But..." You start to protest but Miguel shakes his head, already escorting you to the line in front of the stuffing station. "Thank you so much baby. You spoil me."
Miguel chuckles and says with a small wink. "Well, it's Valentine's Day...but don't expect this to be a regular occurrence."
You smile mischievously, "Oh, well in that case I'm going to milk this opportunity for as long as I can."
Miguel wraps his arm around you and sighs. His wallet may be on fire by the end of the night but anything for his valentine.
He watches you with a tender expression as you scrunch your nose slightly and close your eyes when you make a wish and kiss the small red plush hearts that go inside both stuffed animals. The employee takes them with a smile and hums as she stuffs both of them for you.
Miguel watched, fascinated by the machine as the stuffing churns and gently brings each animal to life.
"Alright, honey, give both of those a hug for me and make sure they're stuffed just right."
You hand Miguel the red teddy. "Can you make sure he has enough stuffing, babe?"
Miguel looks a little bewildered at first but gives the teddy an awkward little squeeze. "Umm,...he feels soft enough to me, I guess. Maybe he could use a rounder belly?" He points out the bear's small pouch.
The employee smiles, "Good call!" She stuffs the red teddy a little bit more and hands it back to Miguel. "How's that?"
Miguel gives the red teddy a fresh squeeze, his belly a little bit more full and firm now. "Perfect." He hands him back to you and you take it with a smile.
"Thanks, baby!"
Miguel's watch goes off with an incoming call from Lyla. "Perdóname..."(forgive me) You nod and give him a reassuring smile and watch him walk outside to take it, unaware that you and Lyla orchestrated the distraction.
Perfect. Everything was going to plan. You walked back to the bins and scanned them looking for the perfect one. You chose a tan, fuzzy rabbit with droopy pink ears and handed it to the employee. "Can I get this one too, please?"
-----
Later, you and Miguel are walking to his car with three cardboard stuffed animal carriers. "Can you carry this one baby?"
The corner of Miguel's mouth raises. "Got yourself an extra one?"
You smile. "Nah I got that one for you! But you can't look at it until we get to the restaurant. It's your big surprise."
Miguel smiles and looks at the box curiously. He wasn't used to receiving little presents and surprises like this until you came along. He felt a warm fuzzy feeling in his veins as he looked back at you. "You shouldn't have."
You smile and kiss the back of his hand you're holding. "Course I should have. You're my valentine."
Miguel gives you an affectionate smile in response and you two drive to the restaurant, a gentle flurry of snowflakes begins to dust the rooftops of Nueva York as the daylight wanes.
----
Your hands start to get clammy as Miguel leads you into the mystery restaurant, eyes closed. You hear the familiar restaurant clatter and rush of the indoor environment, then you feel the chilliness of the outside again, then quiet and warmth greets you in an unfamiliar, new setting.
"Abre los ojos, muñeca..." (Open your eyes, doll)
You look and your breath catches in your throat at the sight around you. Miguel reserved a clear, outdoor igloo on the rooftop of one of Nueva York's finest restaurants. The night was turning an imperial blue now, the light now scarce with grey clouds smearing the corners of the sky except where the snowflakes were falling through.
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Source: Pinterest, from this online article.
Twinkle lights adorned the inside and outside of the igloo, creating a whimsical feel with tall outdoor heaters supplying warmth. There was an inviting couch with several decorative pillows and blankets adorning it. A sleek table sat in the front of it complete with soft glowing candles, antipasto on a wooden plank, and two wine glasses.
Your heart melted almost as quickly as the tears rushed to the corners of your eyes as you stood on tiptoe to give Miguel a kiss of gratitude.
You felt him smile against your lips. "You like it?..."
"Baby, I love it. Thank you so, so much..."
Miguel sits you down and you both get cozy underneath one of the blankets, lifting up your wine glasses to toast the evening.
"To you....let tonight become another sweet memory we can look back on together," he says.
You smile in agreement. "And here's to my ring finger not staying vacant for much longer."
Miguel chuckles as you click glasses. "It won't, baby, I promise you that..."
You feel your heart pound in your chest at the words he spoke combined with what you know is coming next. You turn and pick up the cardboard carrier, presenting it to him. "Time for your surprise, babe..."
Miguel grins and takes the cardboard box from you. He jokingly shakes it as though a feral animal were really inside, then cracks it open.
You giggle, then bring your hands to your lips in anticipation.
Miguel's eyes widen as he finds the tan, fuzzy stuffed rabbit with floppy ears, then his lips fall open as he takes it out.
The rabbit is dressed in a little blue soccer uniform and has a little red bow on one of its ears. Miguel's heart freezes in his chest at the familiar realization. He looks at you with surprise. "Baby...is this..?"
The tears have gotten to you already. You nod, trying to speak through the lump in your throat. "Press its paw..."
Miguel presses the rabbit's paw.
His favorite voice in the world...one that he hadn't heard in such a long time...the one that brought him so much happiness but also ached his soul. The sound that signified all his grief. His love with nowhere to go.
The voice of his little girl is heard... clear as day.
"Te amo y te extraño, papá. Eres el mejor padre del mundo. Besos de Gabi." (I love you and miss you, papa. You are the best father in the world. Kisses, from Gabi)
Miguel just sits there in awe, unable to speak. He presses the rabbit's paw again, as though to make sure he heard it correctly. Gabi's sweet voice speaks again, and he brings the rabbit to his chest, clutching it. Miguel is silent with his eyes closed, and then you notice his shoulders start to gently shake as his quiet sobs can't be contained anymore. He's just a loving father missing his baby girl.
"Happy Valentine's Day, my love..." You whisper, taking Miguel into your arms.
He lays his head against your chest, still clutching the rabbit, hot tears still running down his cheeks, unable to speak.
"Thank you..." He says at last in a hoarse whisper. "I miss her..."
You nod, his head still tucked in the crook of your neck. "I know, baby...I'm here...."
For the longest moment in time, it's just you two holding one another, the sweet rabbit sandwiched between your two hearts that surely can't contain the overwhelming adoration that has just blossomed and brought you two even closer together from this tender memory. No words are needed, but when he finally regains his strength, his brings his eyes to look at you, two sweet rubies glossy with a window of tears.
"I love you so much...you have no idea how precious this is to me..."
Your face melts, your own lovely eyes caked in emotional tears.
"I love you, sweetheart. You'll never know how much I do..."
Miguel shakes his head. "I have a pretty good idea...it's my love for you that you will never be able to comprehend, mi vida..."
You bring your lips closer and he greets them with his own. Warm and cozy, you two let the emotions of tonight speak for themselves in this soft gesture. Two souls in love in a little starlit igloo while the Valentine's Day snow carries on outside, the love between you two more than enough to keep you warm.
-----
Later, you two are chest to chest, your neck craned a little bit as you gaze up into those vermillion eyes, a love song accompanying your casual sways back and forth, fingers interlocked in a loving clasp.
The sweet stuffed rabbit, Gigi, sits among her two new friends, Yogurt, the Yak and Maraschino, the red teddy on your pillows which will be greeted by you and Miguel shortly.
Miguel drags his thumb along your bottom lip, pausing in the middle. His warm, sweet breath greets yours and you let him in, the caress of his tongue quickly making the kiss quite passionate as your lips move softly together.
You break apart, his eyes locked deliciously on you. Your chest rises in shaky, excited breaths as you feel his hands gently make their way to your clothed breasts.
Miguel notes your flustered reaction and smirks a bit. "Tired...?"
You flash him a little smile and press your forehead against his. "I can afford to lose another hour..."
A soft groan rumbles in his chest and he moves his hand to the back of your neck, skimming past the chain that holds the little vial with his blood over your delicate heart.
You feel the tiny vibration of your zipper buzz against your back as he drags it down.
Miguel whispers, "Let's make that two..."
-----
💌🥹💕
299 notes · View notes
tainted-liquor · 6 months
Text
✮ 4th Baby Mama‧₊˚ ⋅ 「15.10.23」 ft. Earth42 Miles G. Morales
ingredients; Sugar, kisses, n a lil bit of smiles!
Listen, ik you said make it just one, but a part 2 is going to be made lol
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It was a warm day out in Brooklyn, New York. The air gently caressed and kissed your skin, leaving your blue plaid skirt flowing as you trekked through the messy streets of Brooklyn. You paid no attention to the gunshots, explosions, or any of the...cherry-wine tinted 'spills' coming from a random trash bag in the alley. You mumbled along to the music you had blasting through your blue metallic beats, putting a slight pep in your step as Summer Walker spoke to your soul.
"I wanna start wit' yo mama, she shoulda whooped yo ass..." you grunted, giggling to yourself before swinging open the massive oak doors to Brooklyn Visions Academy. You felt rather giddy about the day ahead, knowing that you would be getting robotic babies as part of your home economics class. The problem was that you didn't know who you would be partnered with. It was all shits and giggles, and you were pretty sure the task would be as easy as ever. No matter who you were partnered with! Right?
No.
You made your way to the locker, checking your lashes and light makeup in the small mirror you had placed in the top right corner before placing all your unnecessary materials inside the navy blue metal. You did a quick fluff of your slick low bun and threw on your clear-framed glasses. You opened up your spearmint mentos gum, popping two small pieces in your mouth before closing your locker and proceeding through the bustling halls to find your friends. You lowered your headphones down to your neck, pausing the music and locating your girls all crowded together in what sounded like frantic whispers and sharp giggles. Catching up to the rest of the group, you merged into their tight circle to see what was going on as they all looked down at each other's phones.
"Yooo, what's happening? What y'all lookin' at?" You inquired whilst pulling out your phone and opening your school email. You turned your head to face your friend, Tierra, watching as the cyber-blue hue illuminated her facial features as she stared down at her screen with a hand over her mouth. Layla spoke up, nudging you gently so you could see what she was talking about, "They picked the partners for the...the fuckin' baby project at random!" She giggled, tears pricking her waterline as she flipped her screen to show you what was on her phone. You scanned through the list, eyes widening when you came across your name right next to Miles'.
"WHAT!" You shouted, breaking out into laughter with the rest of the group. "They paired me with my fuckin' ex, at least you got that quiet kid!" Tierra grunted, whacking you on the shoulder with a rolled-up homework assignment. You nearly fell on the floor, gripping Katie's shoulder while she held up upright. The idea of raising a baby, real or not, with a stranger sounded hilarious. You weren't mad, but he wasn't exactly the partner you wanted. You originally hoped for one of your girlfriends, or maybe even a cute guy from the basketball team that you could yap about later. But alas, the forms were out and the choices were final, so there was nothing more that you could do.
You were familiar with Miles; saying hi to him now and again in the hallways and always getting the same upward nod in the process. He was known to be an adept artist who wasn't big on having a large circle of friends, but that didn't mean he was weird. You held your stomach as you wiped your tears, easing into the steady flow of conversation your friends began to hold before it was time for you to head to your advisory. You waved bye to your friends before heading to Mrs. Thomas’ classroom for said advisory, where she covered the school's upcoming events and big tests we needed to be ready for. You fiddled and played with a loose curl in your bun, pulling it down and watching as it sprang back up at an instantaneous rate. 
The room was dull and filled with nothing but sleep until the bell rang, signaling for everyone to file out to their next class. You hastily grabbed your things, panicking slightly at the fact that in the next 30 minutes, you would be classified as a ‘mother’. The classroom was warm and comfortable, allowing your nerves to relax slightly as you sat in your usual seat. It didn’t take long for more voices to pour in, loud gossip and strained laughter filling the room as everyone took their respective seats. ”Girl this class finna be the death of me…how we havin’ kids at 8:35 in the morning!” Your friend Jayda mumbled, finally sitting down next to you as your teacher prepared to start today’s lesson.
“Nah that’s what I’m saying…Like, tell me how I got-” you began, cutting yourself off as soon as Ms. Kaylee cleared her throat and stood up from her desk with a warm smile. She spoke, her voice cutting clearly through the silence that hung over the room like a mistletoe over a pair with chemistry as thick as butter, “Alright, everyone! I’m sure you saw the email about your partners for your week-long project, but in case you didn’t have time or missed a couple of lessons I’ll go over everything for a couple minutes before we get started with our gender reveal!” You tensed in your seat, looking over at Jayda with wide eyes and an upside-down smile. The classroom door came swinging open, revealing a Miles who had a tiny matte-black bandage right next to his lip. His uniform jacket was missing, his tie askew, and his sleeves were rolled up to his upper bicep, displaying a ton of tiny scratches and a small bruise above the curve of his elbow. 
The teacher glared at him for what felt like a minute, calmly pulling him to the side to discuss his entrance while you glared at him, too. But you weren’t staring because he was a disruption to the classroom. He looked delicious like this…when he was finally out of his usual blue school hoodie and grey slacks. You watched as he nodded at the teacher, towering over her 5’4 stature before you felt a light tap on your arm. 
“Ayo, stop drooling girl we see you” Jayda laughed, giving her a firm eye-roll as you watched Miles stroll back to his desk and sit down. Ms. Kaylee let go of a deep sigh, shaking her head before continuing with her speech. She gave a brief explanation of what it was that we’d be doing, what the final goal was, and how we would be graded on our project. She clapped her hands together, setting out a bunch of baby holders and car seats before rolling out a massive case labeled ‘RealCare’. “Alright! When I call you and your partner's name, please come up and grab one bath bomb and a pail of water”
The people around you made quick work of finding their partners and grabbing the necessary supplies between chortles and hushed conversation. Your chest felt heavy as you talked Jayda’s ear off, nearing the order of people that you last saw on the Google form she had emailed you earlier. You perked up as soon as you heard your name, turning around to see Ms. Kaylee check off two spaces on her clipboard before beckoning the both of you to come up and grab your things. You sighed, getting up from your desk and grabbing a plain white bath bomb and a small beach pale filled with lukewarm water while Miles grunted and grabbed a car seat, muscles tensing and flexing under the weight of the surprisingly heavy chunk of plastic. He turned over to look at you, nodding his head back to his desk as a signal for you to follow him while you waited for the teacher to finish reading out the pairs. 
“Wassup, Miles” you beamed, pulling up a chair in front of his desk so you could sit face-to-face with him while you placed the sunny yellow pale on the desk, holding the bath bomb as delicately as possible in your cupped hands. He nodded upward, setting the car seat on the floor next to him and cracking his knuckles. His skin was perfectly smooth, his braids laid neatly at the tip of his collarbones and he had a skinny but lean build on him. It wasn’t long after you took note of him avoiding your gaze that the teacher spoke up, instructing you to all drop your bath bombs in the pail of water and then rinse your hands at the sink. You squealed in anticipation, making sure that Miles was watching as you dropped the chalky white bath bomb into the sparkling clear water.
The bucket exploded with color, white foam suddenly turning into shades of bright pink and pastel fuchsia. You beamed from ear to ear, pure joy and excitement illuminating your face as you joined the rest of the class in their shouts of joy, exclaiming their ‘babies’ gender at the top of their lungs. Miles smiled slightly, nodding with a content expression before he leaned back in his chair and looked up at the ceiling. Shortly after everyone's joyful exclamation, the teacher wasted no time in collecting everyone's attention and going over the plan for the next week. “You will need to devise a custody plan with your partner, so this means exchange numbers or whatever you need to do now. You may now all come up and select your baby” Ms. Kaylee explained and gestured to the now-open box.
You went up with Miles, quickly scooping up a pretty baby doll with deep brown skin and curly brown hair. You analyzed her little face, taking in her deep black eyes and light pink headband that came with her matching pink onesie while Miles got your baby bag full of supplies and wristbands. Miles cleared his throat, holding up his phone before mumbling “Just send me what days you want me to get her and I’ll make it work.”
You nodded, putting your number in his contacts and vice versa. “Actually,” he stated, gently taking the baby from your arms and hoisting up the bright pink baby bag. “I got her until lunch today. I’ll come find you and we’ll work sum’ out,” he shrugged as you handed him back his phone.
“Oh aight, bet. What we naming her?” You asked, attempting to reach for the car seat, but being instantly denied by Miles. “Uhh…” he mumbled, visibly blanking at the idea of having to name his baby. “Uhh…Anylah?” He smirked, attempting to cover up the fact he just thought of a name on the spot. You looked him up and down, playing over how the name sounded in your mind before nodding slowly. Miles let go of a deep breath, posture relaxing only a fraction before he reached into the bag to put on both of your orange wristbands.
“Aight, I’ll catch you at lunch,” Miles stated, making his way out of the classroom with a heavy load of baby items and a fake baby. You made your way to your remaining 4 classes, internally groaning at how fast the time was passing by.
“She ain’t even tell us these fuckin babies cry…I didn’t know that shit made noise! It started going off in the library!” Your friend Jayda moaned, attempting to shush her fussy baby she named Mariah. “The fuck you mean you didn’t know they cried…it was literally in the paper she gave us about the babies?” You asked, looking at her like she had a second head. She shrugged, eyeing you with slightly widened eyes and a smirk to silently convey that she didn’t read the forms. “JAYDA!” You giggled, half-shoving her as you opened up the doors to the cafeteria. The line was nothing short of demonic, so you decided to hop a couple of places forward with your friends who had already made it to the cafeteria.
The food was mediocre, but at least it was edible. You sat with your girls for a good 5 minutes, enjoying your food and conversing with each other before you spotted Miles making his way over. He held the baby like a football, making space for himself at your table with a low “excuse me” in between you and Tierra. “Aight so my schedule is weird cuz I have work some days, but I’ll make it work what days should I get this thing?” He asked, his voice low and stoic as he began typing away in the notes app on his phone. You gave him a playful glare, attempting to push down the smirk that was forming on your face. “Don’t call her a thing, this is your daughter,” you joked with an exaggerated roll of your eyes. “But you can take…Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday!” You exclaimed, taking the baby from Miles and checking your calendar. Great, Wednesday!
“My daughter huh? Aight, I gotchu,” he sniggered before tucking his phone in his back pocket. He tapped on the table, shooting you a wink you swear you hallucinated before retreating to his group of homies without another word. Your head dropped down to your fake baby, fighting back a smirk as you submerged yourself back in your conversation.
Whatever you thought this project was going to be, you certainly didn’t anticipate anything from the road ahead.
It was 1 AM, and your arms felt sore from the constant rocking of this baby that weighed nothing less than 7 pounds. You changed what felt like 4 diapers, fed her for almost 20 minutes, and spent your night pacing through your kitchen to calm her down. You whined along with the baby, praying to whoever was listening that she’d be finished soon. You grabbed your phone from your shorts pocket, quickly dialing up Miles as a last attempt. You felt like you were intruding on his private life, but something in this goddamn world has to give.
The phone rang twice, sighing to yourself when you heard the familiar ringtone come to an abrupt stop. There was rustling, what sounded like a low breathy grunt, before Miles picked up the phone. “Yo…what’s good, whatchu need?” he mumbled, his voice sounding sickeningly velvety as he attempted to shake the sleep from his vocal cords. “Uh, hey. Anylah won’t stop crying and I don’t know what to do…Can you come help, please?” You winced, balancing your phone between your cheek and shoulder. He made a low noise that sounded like a cross of a low hum of approval, and a groan of missed sleep before he got up, stretched, threw on a quick hoodie, and knotted his sweats. “I’ll be over in like…a couple minutes” he grumbled, hanging up almost as soon as you could say “thanks.”
He knocked at your front door not even five minutes later, leaving you to drown in his shadow as he stood over you with a tired, blank, and semi-serious expression. The frosty air from the outdoors nipped at any inch of skin it could find purchase, leaving you to beckon him inside the door as quickly as possible. You handed him the crying infant, watching as his eyes widened by a fraction before returning to their initial low post. “Damn, not even a hello?” He chuckled as he took a wailing Anylah in his arms, rocking the baby at an oddly specific angle. “I know you didn’t just pull up to my crib talkin’ like someone's absent baby father…” you joked, rolling your eyes and taking your respective place back on the couch. 
“Hello, Morales.” You commented, leaning your head on his shoulder sleepily as he sat next to you on the couch. He nodded, somehow managing to hush the baby within the first 45 seconds of holding her. You huffed, feeling slightly irritated at how he managed to finish what you were attempting to do for over an hour in only a minute. “You were rocking her…too fast,” he slurred, clearly tired as he attempted to hold his eyes open. You didn’t even realize that you had fallen asleep, attempting to reach for the baby before ultimately clocking out for the night.
You woke up feeling groggy, sluggish, and plagued by a small migraine. Both Anylah and Miles were nowhere to be found, feeling around for your phone only to grab a purple sticky note stuck to the back of your phone case.
‘Went back home.’
You sighed, shooting Miles a text immediately that let him know to not disappear like that with the doll. You got ready for school, taking a scalding hot shower and repeating your daily routine of thoroughly scrubbing and exfoliating your face. You threw on your uniform, prioritizing the aesthetic of your uniform as you tugged on some rather cutesy slouch socks. You skipped breakfast at home, opting to grab something from the cafeteria before slipping out the front door and facing the cold air once again. Damn, this day was bound to be long as hell.
You reached school, giggling at your phone down the street as you ‘bickered’ back and forth with Miles.
‘alr alr mb. I didnt think it thru.’
‘Fym you didn’t think it through? I thought I was finna fail’
‘u actin like sb baby mama rn.’
‘Ntm now’
‘my fault’
You powered off your phone, jamming the smooth plastic case into the deep pockets of your black shorts under your school skirt. Today you had a class on burping babies and how to properly dress them for the winter, eagerly anticipating the cute little coats they’d provide for your shared babydoll. You took your seat, silently doodling in your notebook until you heard the familiar cold tone fade into the classroom. “Qué quieres decir? Esta mi mamá del bebé es ahí mismo,” he chuckled, carrying both the baby bag in one hand and Anylah in the other. “Baby mama is craaazy…” the boy he was talking to muttered, looking utterly tired and vaguely annoyed.
He took his seat next to you, giving you an upward nod as he cradled Anylah in one arm while he mindlessly scrolled through his phone with the other. 
“Not you calling me your baby mother…”
"It's funny"
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@ashsostrangee @chessboxx @janaeby @faeriesoiree333 @fivestardior @an1bara @bachirasegoist @milesnanana77 @niaurluv @sp1derw1re @ban-al3x @we-loveebony @kae2kaee @dxrlingcc
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gretagerwigsmuse · 6 months
Text
rocketman: part i - it's just my job five days a week
Summary: in which lieutenant commander bradshaw is on a three month special detachment in the pacific and the holidays have never felt lonelier for either of you. it's just three months, it'll be fine, right?
OR you and bradley write each other 159 emails
Pairing: Rooster x Fem!Reader 11.8k
Warnings: 18+, explicit language, suggestive dialogue, bradley needs to remember this is a government email server...(okay yes, i am perfectly aware that our esteemed lieutenant commander would probably get kicked out of the navy for some of these emails…that being said, i also don’t particularly care! we’re playing fast and loose with the time stamps too because i may be smart, but math has never been a strong suit of mine!) enjoy the companion playlist! rest of the series can be found here!
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12/17 @ 6:19am
I miss you already and I haven’t even left the parking lot. I’m still in my car typing this after having stayed for probably far too long watching your C-40 take off (like people were staring at me I was there so long)(and, yes, I looked up the name of the plane). Pete asked me if I wanted to get breakfast with him, but I said no. Felt too lost. Plus, I need to get ready for work. We’re going to get dinner on Wednesday before I head up to Berkeley Thursday morning, though!
Hope you have a safe transport and settle onboard quickly. I left you something in your duffle bag (yes, it’s safe to open around other people…head out of the gutter, Bradshaw).
Love you and stay safe, x
12/18 @ 5:46pm 
Just dropped off the gifts at the Junior League for Caroline’s adopt a child thing. She was completely in her element (they gave her a clipboard and a bullhorn!), though she did say we went wayyy too over the top. But little Carter asked for all that stuff! We couldn’t just not get it all for him? She also appreciated your wrapping skills, very impressed with the bows and tight corners. I met a couple of her friends there, which was nice and they invited me to stay for drinks (the prosecco was flowing…), but I wanted to head home. 
I miss you so much already, it feels weird not going over to your place after work and making dinner and prepping lunch together - and it’s only been two days. I know you’re on a comms blackout for the next couple days, so I’m just gonna keep sending these so you’ll have a bunch to read all at once.
All my love, x
12/19 @ 11:48am
My brother and Lauren decided to come out here for Christmas after all! My dad was so excited when he called me, but I think Mary’s a little less enthused. Feels like shit knowing we were the backup option for them. Apparently, Lauren’s mom is sick and the whole house is in disarray (not hard in that family…) so my dad is paying for them to fly in from New York tomorrow. I think it’ll be nice, we’ll almost have a full set (baring you, of course, my darling rocketman), so the house won’t be as lonely. Do you think we’ll get to talk on Christmas or Christmas Eve? You should be getting a package soon (‘twas preemptively sent!) and are under strict orders not to open it until Christmas Eve, buddy!
Going to dinner with Pete tonight, I’ll let you know how it goes. Amelia’s coming with us, but I don’t know about Penny? I hope they like the gifts we got them. I’m going to stop by your place, do a once over, and make sure the tree is ready for Pete to take, etc. before I leave on Thursday.
Love you and talk soon! x
12/20 @ 7:03am
House looked good! In my seat on the plane. If my morals were shakier, I would 1000% have taken Max up on his offer to fly me up to Berkeley. But alas! Climate change is real and private jets account for 20x as many carbon emissions as commercial planes, so I am up at the ass-crack of dawn for this 7:15am flight. I’ll message you when I land, love you!
12/20 @ 9:04am
Just landed - easy flight. Now to find my dad in arrivals…
Love you, talk when you get the chance! x
12/23 @ 4:45am
Hey sweetheart! Back online and all settled in. I’m bunking with Payback and we actually have a pretty decent layout. He graciously offered to give me the bottom bunk, due to my ‘geriatric status.’ Honestly, I’m just glad I don’t have to sleep in the bunk room with the ensigns and rest of the crew. I forgot how noisy it is being on an aircraft carrier, which makes Payback’s snoring surprisingly pleasant. I’m glad he and Bob are with me. The rest of this squadron’s from Lemoore and Bob knows some of them. It’s interesting seeing him and Payback fly together, but they mesh really well.
Glad Mav is there to keep an eye on you. 
Okay, I had way too much fun picking out all those presents, so I really hope Carter loves them too. And please tell me you have a picture of Caroline yelling into the bullhorn? I can truly think of nothing scarier than Caroline Calloway ordering the young women of San Diego county around like Santa’s chief elf. And speaking of gifts, I loved my pictures. The one from the Christmas party is my favorite, did Fanboy take it? I saw him running around with his Pentax. When the hell did you have time to print it? I’ve got it hanging up in my bunk so I can see it every night. 
I still don’t understand why you don’t fly into Oakland instead of SFO? Like I get it, you’re not a Spirit or SW girl, but kid….it’s an hour and forty minute flight? Live a little. And I think it’ll be nice having your brother and Lauren around for Christmas. How many people do you think it’ll be? I always loved seeing Christmas Eves with large families in movies and stuff, all the chaos and whatnot? But it’s just gonna be you five Christmas Day? I’ve heard rumblings that I might be first in line for a Facetime on Christmas Eve, so save some time for me too, kid. I’ll let you know for sure in a couple days. 
Okay, think we’re all caught up now. Talk soon and love you so much,
Your Bradley
12/23 @ 9:08am
Bubs! I read your email four times since I woke up, I can’t stop smiling. I’m glad you’re all settled in - Payback’s snoring and ageism aside haha. How’s the food? Do you want earplugs? A sleep mask? Are earplugs allowed for sleeping? What if you need to get up right away and you can’t hear? I could send you a white noise machine? Or is there a fear of hacking with that? I should’ve done more research on this before you left. Tell me if you need anything, I’ll send it out express! Oh, I’m just so happy to hear from you. Keep me posted!
Lots of love, x
12/23 @ 8:53pm
You and me, hot date tomorrow night at 11:45pst - don’t be late. (And look cute.)
Your Bradley
12/23 @ 8:55pm
I’ll be there 😉 Love you, x
12/25 @ 9:56am
Bradley Bradshaw you absolute sneak! How on Earth did you pull a Christmas miracle off!?! Mary said she had no clue, so I’m extremely impressed you got my dad to keep that secret!? I was totally not expecting another present from you? The cooking lessons and apron were more than enough - to say nothing about moving in together!?! I love the bracelet so much, you have no idea. I started crying when I opened it! Mary took a video, which I’m sure she’ll send you. God, Bradley? You didn’t have to do that! It’s perfect, it’s like we’re locked together. I’m gonna wear it everyday. Please email me later if you get the chance! 
(Also, Lauren looked really jealous 😉 my brother was sweating)
Love you and Merry Christmas Rocketman! x
12/25 @ 11:38am
Ummm, not sure what you’re talking about, kid? That sounds like something Santa would do? Probably heard about how good you’ve been this year? x
12/25 @ 11:40am
Thank you, I love it so much and wish I could give you the biggest hug and kiss right now. I’ll have an extra slice of babka for you tonight, talk soon and Merry Christmas, Bradley! Love you x
12/27 @ 4:49am
I miss sleeping next to you. Whenever I can’t sleep, I think about the way you looked at me in the living room after our Christmas party. You looked so happy and I hate that I have to leave you for all our firsts. First Christmas, first New Year’s, first Valentine’s Day. And god, sweetheart, you’re so fucking gorgeous it makes me want to lose my mind sometimes. Always thinking about you, Bradley 
12/27 @ 8:38am
I miss sleeping next to you, too (especially since your body is like a furnace and you hold me close when I get cold). And I know you being away during the holidays is hard, but look at it this way - we’ll just have our firsts next year. Next year will be our first Christmas, first New Year’s, first Valentine’s Day together, not an ocean apart. We have all the time in the world, rocketman. Love you today and every day x
12/29 @ 6:02pm
There’s already so many things I’m dying to tell you and stories about the squadron we’re teaming up with, but the Navy will have my ass if I give away too many details so I’m just going to leave it at this: are we sure Max doesn’t have a twin on another continent? Take that as you will. What’re your plans for New Year’s? Your Bradley
12/30 @ 9:20am
Sorry for the delayed response! A minor issue with my brother and my dad that I won’t bore you with had the whole house in a tizzy. Thankfully, he and Lauren are gone even though my dad still won’t tell me what the issue was? Anyway! God, I wish I could hear more about Max’s twin? I am honestly kind of scared about knowing there’s a Max doppelgänger in the Navy (jokes!). For New Year’s, I’m going to this party with Mary and dad in the city, it’s at this fancy venue and I have a cute black dress! It’s very different for me and I wish you were here to see it! I’ll have to wear it again. Message me when it’s the New Year your time! Love you! x
01/01 @ 12:09am
Happy New Year, sweetheart! They had a little party for the officers - we even got cake and Bob snuck me and Payback seconds somehow. It’s always the quiet ones you gotta look out for. You absolutely need to send me pictures of you in that dress, I can’t wait to see it on you in person someday. Hope you have a great time with your dad and Mary, give them my best. Love you and again Happy New Year! 
Your Bradley
01/01 @ 12:01am
Happy New Year, Bradley!!! You got cake!! You broke some rules! I approve! Milk them for all the cake they’re worth! I’ll send some pics of the three of us and one just for you big boy 😉 Talk soon and love you so so much! x
01/01 @ 10:59am
Had a late start! Here are the pics from last night! Try and sneak some more cake xx
[mary_and_dad_being_annoying.jpg]
[me.jpg]
01/02 @ 6:12am
You know you labeled the pictures wrong…luckily no one was behind me…
01/02 @ 9:04am
Who? Me? I would NEVER! (Just trying to keep you on your toes.) Hope the flying is going well and you’re staying safe, B! Love you!
01/03 @ 8:00pm
Yeah, it’s going well. It’s so different flying on the open ocean after so long? Last time was in September when I went to Hong Kong. The desert is cool, don’t get me wrong, but seeing the clouds and the water together is unreal. The pink and purple clouds remind me of you (sorry, that was lame). You still gotta let me take you up, kid. I’ve heard Mav is trying to convince you, but you gotta let me be the one. Can’t trust just anyone with my girl. Love B
01/04 @ 10:13am
Bradley…he’s practically your father, I’m pretty sure you can trust him to take me up in a plane, you silly boy. Not that I’m saying you won’t be my first…but come on! And it’s not lame. I like that the pink and purple clouds remind you of me. Every time I see a plane I send a little call out for your safety. Gotta keep you safe, rocketman! Talk soon and love you! x
01/06 @ 4:45pm
My parents just dropped me off at the airport and no matter how many times I leave them, I always cry. I think the only time I didn’t cry when I left their house was when you were with me over Thanksgiving. You always make it better, bubs.
They’re coming down in a couple weeks to help me start packing, anything in the house you wouldn’t want them to see while dropping off boxes? I can still bring my old bed, etc for the guest room, right?
All my love, x
01/06 @ 9:58pm
I think I get that, having you around this time makes it different. I’ve never had anyone to really write to while I’ve been away before. Sure, I talked to my grandparents when they were still around and my aunts and uncles, Nat, Ice, and a couple others, but not like this. And I don’t ever want to not feel like this again. 
I’m an open book, kid. Ain’t got nothing to hide. And yeah, anything like that feel free to bring with you for the guest room or office. It was the bed, nightstands, and dresser and then your couch for the office, yeah? We can get new bedding and pillows for it if you want? I’m on comms blackout for a couple days, so message me whenever you want so I can read them all when we’re back online.
Your Bradley
01/06 @ 10:07pm
Perfect! Love you and stay safe, rocketman.
01/06 @ 10:09pm
Love you too, kid.
01/09 @ 6:11pm
Bradley, I don’t mean to alarm you, but there was a raccoon in your garage! Scratch that, a FAMILY of raccoons!??! I’m sure Mr Harrington was ready to call the cops when he heard my scream. They’re so cute, but also terrifying at the same time? So, I called Pete and he came right over, a true knight in shining armor! Amelia and I did a THOROUGH sweep of the house to make sure they were relegated to the garage. Pete got them out safe and sound with a random tennis racket and your 4 iron, but somebody’s coming tomorrow to check on how they got in there. And I know they aren’t hurting anyone, but I just don’t want there to be any issues later on? (The babies were actually so cute and reminded me of my cat growing up, Porter.) Anyway! Enough drama for tonight, I hope that gets a laugh out of you - talk soon!
Love you! x
01/10 @ 8:05am
Well, the exterminator got here around 7:30 and sprayed all this stuff and blocked the hole in the crawl space of the garage. He showed me pictures and let me tell you, there was quite the nest up there. These raccoons were living large over the holidays. 
01/12 @ 5:21pm
Okay! I’m in the parking lot, waiting for my first cooking class to start. Is it weird I’m a little nervous? I hope everyone else’s skill level is similar, I don’t like feeling behind. I brought my new apron, ironed it and everything. I feel a little like Ina Garten, isn’t she just divine? Okay, okay, I’m going in now! I’ll let you know how it goes! Thanks again for getting me these xx
01/12 @ 7:03pm
I feel so tired? Like my hand cramped a little bit? We started off the class with knife skills, which we’re going to do every week and then made this “simple” egg dish, which was NOT simple and I overcooked the egg. Ina would be so disappointed. Alas! Onto next week. Love you!
01/15 @ 9:12pm
Bradley you’re not going to BELIEVE what just happened on Succession. My heart is POUNDING? Do you think if I called and asked really nicely the Navy would get an HBO subscription for everyone? That is what I would like my tax dollars to go towards. Can you get me a direct line to someone in charge please? Love you!
01/16 @ 7:47am
Not to worry my little Barefoot Contessa, I have returned back to civilization (ie the internet), though am dismayed to have missed this mind blowing Succession episode? Has Perry Mason started back up again or will we be able to watch that together? 
Bob and I were in the gym earlier and he almost dropped a dumbbell on my foot, I swear my life flashed before my eyes. But I had a new PR on the bench press today, up to 285 pounds. Glad the cooking lesson went well though! What’s the class makeup like? x Bradley 
01/16 @ 9:04am
I’m glad you’re back online and safe! Perry Mason has not started yet, though I’m still certain you’re the only person under the age of 55 that watches it (I guess I should say we’re the only people under the age of 55 that watch it, but whatever). You’ve also missed a couple Top Chef episodes, but we can always binge this season later. 
There’s about 12 of us in the class and it’s pretty evenly split? Though there’s tragically this really annoying couple who were at the station next to me. I hope we get to change next week, I don’t think I can watch them feed each other food another week. 
And I’m still waiting for that direct line to the Navy, Bradshaw! Love you! x
01/1 6 @ 6:59pm
Wait, wait, how did I miss there? There was a WHAT in my garage? A raccoon? Multiple raccoons? We need to get a dog or a cat or something. x Bradley 
01/18 @ 7:02am
Bradley!! I know we talked about a trip once you got home (provided you still feel up for it with the transition and all), what if we went here? I was talking about our tentative plans with my dad and Mary before I went back to San Diego and they went to Punta Mita this past fall and LOVED it! What do you think? Love you!
01/18 @ 6:03pm
Holy shit! That looks absolutely amazing, yes I’d love to go! Can we afford that though? It looks expensive? xBradley
01/18 @ 6:05pm
YAY!! Ahh, I’m so excited you have no idea! I want to hug and kiss you so bad right now! We can fly for free since I have a bunch of AA points (thank you pwc) and then I have like a million Amex points, so it’s not full price!! 
01/18 @ 6:12pm
When you say ‘like a million’ do you actually mean a million or?
01/18 @ 6:14pm
Yes! I’ve had this card for like 15 years! My whole family does the pooling on it! It’s a drop in the bucket, promise! Plus, I always use my other card for work and that has a whole bunch of Bonvoy points on it, too. We could stay at one of those? I think there’s a St Regis next door?
01/18 @ 6:22pm
Sweetheart, I want to go, I just don’t want you to waste all those points on this. 
01/18 @ 6:26pm
What if we go for 6 nights instead of 9? Maybe no plunge pool? Or we could pay cash instead? And then I could get 6x the points from paying that way? So, really….the points just keep accumulating, we’ve got to use them sometime! The points can pay for the flights and the hotel and then we can split the room charges and incidentals 50:50?
Will you think about it? You don’t have to give me an answer right away and we can always pick another hotel? But if we want to go someplace in late March/early April, I think we should book soon with spring break and all? Not that I imagine many coeds will be staying at the Four Seasons, but you never know…
01/18 @ 6:33pm
You gotta send me a ppt on all this points stuff, you know math stresses me out. And no, I don’t think many coeds will be staying at the Four Seasons, kid. 
01/18 @ 6:37pm
Can I send you a dossier with everything!?! Even if you say no to that I’m doing it anyway ;) just promise me you’ll think about it, please? I’ll do whatever you want, Bradley <3
01/18 @ 6:40pm
Yes, please send the dossier my way henceforth, Moneypenny. 
And you’ll do whatever I want, huh? Might have to send you a dossier of my own now…
(But yes, I promise I’ll seriously consider everything. I just don’t want you to feel like you have to spend all this money to make me happy. I’d say we’d both be happy camping out on the beach, but I think that might be a security issue down there, plus neither of us like camping - anyway, you know what I mean.)
01/18 @ 6:43pm
Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw!! Is this a dossier for my eyes only? What will M say!? I’ll send you mine if you send me yours?
(But seriously, thank you! I’ll send you more specifics tomorrow - like pricing and whatnot - and you can take a couple days to think it over. And thank you for clarifying the camping thing, I was worried for a second there.)
I love you so much rocketman and we’ll talk (email) tomorrow 
x Moneypenny 
01/18 @ 6:46pm
I’d say ‘sleep tight,’ but that’s a given considering you haven’t been fucked in a couple weeks. 
(Perfect, I genuinely am really excited about it, just want to make sure it works out for us both.)
Love you so much, kid 
Your Bradley
01/18 @ 6:58pm
Bradley Bradshaw!! You did not just say that over a government email server! 
Imissyourcocksobadlyit’sdrivingmeinsane
01/18 @ 7:01pm
Couldn’t help it. Plus, we both know it’s true. 
01/18 @ 7:04pm
Oh, shut up. Shut me up
01/18 @ 11:43pm
I’m sorry if I came off too strong about planning earlier, I might’ve gotten a little carried away and been a little too eager about planning something five days after you’re home from a three month detachment. If at any time before you come home or even right after you come home you don’t feel up to the trip, please please please tell me. I want to do something nice for you and give you a chance to truly relax, but I’d hate for it to come at a price. So, just let me know, okay? Say the word and we’ll push it, alright? I don’t exactly know what you’re going through, but tell me if it’s ever too much. I’ll always be here, promise. Love you x
[dossier_for_your_eyes_only.ppt]
01/19 @ 8:29am
Kid, no. I promise I’ll tell you. You know I love how excited you get planning things. I think I like it so much because you take care of it all. Sure, you ask for my opinion and what I want, but I just have to tell you one thing, one idea and you take care of it. 
Funny though, isn’t it? How it’s totally opposite in the other side of our relationship? You tell me one thing, one idea and I take care of all of it? Bet it’s hard for you not having someone around to do that for you? Maybe next time we Facetime we can talk more about that? x B
01/19 @ 10:11am
Luckily, I have a very creative imagination, Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw. 
See right now, I’m in my office, sitting at my desk, feeling so overwhelmed. It almost hurts how overwhelmed and frustrated I am. And you bust down the door, hair windswept like you’d flown to Del Mar, and you have that slutty flight suit on and I don’t even mind that you’re sweaty and gross. You smell absolutely divine and I rake my hands through your hair as you eat me out underneath my glass desk. I get a conference call, but you don’t stop the entire time. You like how squirmy and fussy I get, I can’t focus on the deliverable I’m working on for the client. You like that I can’t control myself, that I squeeze my thighs around your head. Eventually, you can’t take it anymore, your cock is aching so badly, and you need to fuck me on top of my desk. You’re so strong it almost breaks. You fuck me so good everyone in the office can hear me crying out for you. 
(actually, I’m on the couch, watching college football, but it’s more fun to imagine you fucking me in my office - see, creative imagination! Make sure you get a quiet room for that Facetime...)
Love x
01/19 @ 7:29pm
You think you’re funny, huh? You have any more of those thoughts, feel free to send them my way. ‘m taking out that picture you gave me for Christmas right now. How you taking care of yourself? My imagination isn’t as creative as yours. B
01/19 @ 7:40pm
Guess you’ll have to wait for our next Facetime…
x
01/20 @ 4:24pm
Your dad and Mary write me emails, you know. They aren’t as good correspondents as you are (for how could they possibly be, my dear?), but they check in about once a week or so. Mary sends me some of the articles she gives her students and talks about the show she’s watching with your dad. Your dad mainly talks about you. It makes me wish my parents were still around to do this stuff with me. Just checking in and writing emails and bragging about me to my girlfriend? How was yesterday’s class?
Your Bradley
01/20 @ 5:39m
I didn’t know they wrote you that often and I’m beyond embarrassed that my dad talks about me that much? But come on, Bradley…you have someone who does that, too? He’s about 5’8” (on a good day), looks great in a leather jacket, and just spent about two hours last weekend cleaning your gutters and telling me about how you won your high school’s debate scholarship?? Like how could you not tell me that? It’s literally one of the hottest things I’ve heard about you!
Class was good! They taught us a trick to cut onions without crying and one of the other girls complimented my apron! We’re doing meats next week, cutting, marinating, cooking, etc. and I’m excited!
01/20 @ 5:42pm
Oh gee, I bet it’s just awful for you to have Mav around all the time. Knight in shining armor…
01/20 @ 5:48pm
He’s not a bother! And it’s not all the time! We’re actually going to get lunch together on Saturday! It’s this new place on the water.
01/20 @ 5:50pm
Sounds like a cute little date! You’ll have to tell me how he is. Love you so much B
01/20 @ 5:55pm
I’ll keep ya posted, bubs! Love you!
01/22 @ 10:01am
Breaking news, kid. Your esteemed, naval aviator boyfriend is going to be on 60 Minutes at the end of February. Totally came out of left field, but I couldn’t say anything until they finished filming. It’s about the Navy in the Pacific and “the lost art of shipbuilding.” They even rigged up a camera on my plane and everything, it was so cool. I’ve been dying to tell you, but again couldn’t say anything until it was official. I probably won’t be on it long since they interviewed the Admiral and Pac Fleet Commander for most of it, but yeah, Payback and Bob and I will be on with my girl Norah. I made sure I had enough sunscreen on so I was camera ready at all times. Love you B
01/22 @ 10:09am
YOU’RE FUCKING SHITTING ME????? Oh my god, Bradley! That’s amazing! Margie even ran into my office to see what made me shriek! I am TOTALLY having a viewing party! Oh my god, how do you think it went? Did they get your good side? What about hair and makeup? I know you get helmet hair, bubs. 
Seriously, so so excited and proud of you, Bradley! I’m going to make my dad and Mary come down for it! She doesn’t teach on Mondays, so this is perfect for them to stay over Sunday night! But now don’t go letting all that fame get to your head, Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw 😉 Love you so much x
01/24 @ 12:17pm
Rocketman - 
I was sitting at my desk earlier and listening to some music before my 12:30 meeting and Elton John’s Rocket Man popped up on my shuffle. Obviously, as you are my rocketman, I always think of you whenever I hear it, but today the lyrics really scratched that special part of my brain, so I did a deep dive into the song’s origins. 
Please note, I’m including this time in my billable hours to the client (re. you). My findings are as follows:
Bernie Taupin was inspired by a Ray Bradbury story written in 1951 titled ‘The Rocket Man’ - not drugs as the urban legend states! Drugs! Imagine!
Bradbury’s ‘The Rocket Man’ was first published in Maclean’s, a weekly Canadian magazine, before it was published in the short story collection ‘The Illustrated Man’ that same year
‘The Illustrated Man’ later was made into a film, though ‘The Rocket Man’ story was notably absent
Some of more popular and renowned stories from the collection include ‘The Veldt’ and ‘The Long Rain,’ the latter of which is commonly read in high school honors English
Was client in honors English? Please confirm in follow up correspondence
Client has mentioned extensive library resources at disposal - perhaps he can check this collection out on his next visit? But for now, an executive summary has been provided:
With space travel more commonplace in society, Doug’s father, an astronaut, is sent on frequent, three- month journeys into space
Despite missing his dad, Doug also longs to be a Rocket Man, though his mother frequently prevails on Doug to beg his father to stay on Earth and be with the family
“What’s it like, out in space?” Mother shot me a frightened glance. It was too late. Dad stood there for a full half minute trying to find an answer, then he shrugged.“It’s the best thing in a lifetime of best things.” Then he caught himself. “Oh, it’s really nothing at all. Routine. You wouldn’t like it.” He looked at me, apprehensively. “But you always go back.” “Habit.”
The father finds that his work is ruining his life, but the draw of the stars is too great: "You don’t know what it is. Every time I’m out there I think, if I ever get back to Earth I’ll stay there; I’ll never go out again. But I got out, and I guess I’ll always go out.”
Even while on vacation with the family, having Thanksgiving dinner, or sitting on the back porch, the father’s eyes are always on the sky…
Doug’s father begs him to not be like him, to not be a rocket man, but what happens when his father goes on one last journey to the stars?
Through much reflection, I have decided that ‘The Rocket Man’ was written about you - and your mom and your dad and me and on and on until there is no longer a need for Rocket Men - or the rocket man simply stops and breaks the cycle
You are both the Rocket Man and the little boy, forever waiting for his father to come home from space
The allure of flying, of being a ‘rocket man,’ is both too great and too sad for you to ignore
None of this is to say the rocket man is selfish, no. He simply cannot resist the temptation. He knows nothing other than the thrill and peace of being amongst the stars
And his mother shielding Doug from the sun at the end is like your mom asking Mav to pull your papers, she does it to save him, but it cannot keep him from becoming his father
Needless to say - I had to postpone my 12:30 meeting until tomorrow as my eyes were far too puffy and any word I tried to say felt like cotton in my mouth.
I miss you and I love you - your ‘Lilly’  
01/24 @ 8:22pm
Fuck - I love you so much. My clever girl.
01/24 @ 8:28pm
I pour my heart out to you and that’s all you have to say, rocketman? ‘Fuck - I love you so much’
(of course, I also love you so much, my clever boy.)
01/24 @ 8:30pm
Darling - it’s going to take me a little longer to come up with any commentary you deem appropriate, so for the sake of time, yes. I gotta read this story in full. I’ll be at the library at my earliest convenience. ‘The client’ will send an annotated copy with his notes henceforth.
01/24 @ 8:32pm
Of course, sweet boy. Goodnight, I love you so much. x
01/25 @ 11:44am
As promised, my darling girl. Love you.
[b.bradshaw_the rocket man_final paper.pdf]
01/25 @ 7:14pm
Oh Bradley! I love you so much, rocketman. Yes, I couldn’t have said it better. Yours x
01/26 @ 10:39am
Bradley! They’re sending me to London in February for two weeks! I even get a swanky corporate apartment for the stay. I wish you could come with me - even if it was just for a long weekend? We could go to all my favorite restaurants and afternoon tea and for walks in all the parks. One day it’ll work out! 
But tragedy of all tragedies! I just realized I’m going to miss a couple cooking lessons when I’m in London! I already emailed the instructor before today’s class and she said there’s other classes throughout the week that are behind us, so I can make it up with them! Ahhh I’m so excited! Talk soon, love you!
01/26 @ 11:13pm
I didn’t realize how nervous I was about the trip until I went to bed tonight. It’ll be my first trip abroad since I got my promotion in November. Plus, it’s a completely different client than my last trip abroad and I’ve only met one person on this new London team before. Sometimes I go into these meetings and still feel like a little kid? I’m always the youngest person in the room and normally the only woman and on one hand, that’s cool? But sometimes I feel like someone’s daughter instead of their colleague? Like these guys are my dad’s age? And they’re actually supposed to listen to what I have to say about their company? Do you ever feel like that? Like you don’t really belong, despite knowing you’ve earned your place? I wish you were beside me right now. My bed feels way too big tonight. Love you.
01/27 @ 7:48am
Sweetheart! I am so unbelievably proud of you! That’s amazing! You gotta celebrate, go out to dinner with Caro and Darcy, maybe even Nat! I know you’ve been working so hard these last couple of weeks, you absolutely deserve this. I can’t say I know exactly what you’re going through, but yes. I have absolutely felt like I haven’t belonged or deserved something despite having ‘checked off all the boxes.’ I felt that way when I got promoted to LC and when I got that award in October. Everytime I see it on my uniform, I feel a bit like a faker? Like do I really deserve this? But then I remember the way you smiled at me when I got back to my seat that night and how proud of me you were and I think maybe I do deserve it? Plus, I also think of how goddamn gorgeous you looked all fucked out later that night. 
And please note, I would happily slip into bed alongside you, especially since my bed feels way too small tonight. Love you, Bradley
01/27 @ 10:56am
Thank you for earlier. I don’t know, sometimes I just feel like I’m just too soft for all of this? Like I’m always trying to prove something to everyone and I get a little lost. Tell me something good? x
01/27 @ 7:01pm
How about this? Every time I go up in the sky and see the way the sun hits the clouds, I think of you. I’ve never wanted to be with someone as much as I want to be with you. I love you so much, kid
Your Bradley 
01/27 @ 7:06pm
Sometimes I can’t believe we love each other this much, it feels like a dream  x
01/27 @ 7:11pm
I can. Your Bradley 
01/30 @ 7:08am
i slept in one of your shirts last night. it doesn’t smell like you anymore, but it feels like you: soft and safe and warm x
01/30 @ 7:23am
Well I spray my pillowcase with your perfume whenever I miss you so I guess we’re even
Your Bradley
ps - can you send me another bottle?
01/30 @ 7:34am
You’re already out? What sort of illicit behavior are you engaging in with that perfume bottle? 
01/30 @ 10:33pm
I burrow my face in my pillow so I can smell it while I fist my cock, why? What’d you have in mind?
01/30 @ 10:37pm
How does that work though? Like genuinely? Do you jack off with Rueben in the top bunk? Or wait till he’s in the gym? I’ve been curious about this for a while now. What about the showers? Is it like an open floor plan thing? Or are there stalls? Is there a Zillow listing for this aircraft carrier?
01/30 @ 10:41pm
Now why would I ruin the mystery? 
01/30 @ 10:43pm
Bradley!!!!
01/30 @ 10:44pm
Atta girl, that’s the spirit! Love you 
02/02 @ 6:30pm
I am so sick of going to the gym. It seems like it’s all Payback and I do lately. We got this new workout regime that’s been killing me - don’t say it’s because I’m old. Though, I have been using my Theragun. Payback does my back if I do his in return. It was only awkward the first time he turned it on too hard and yelped (please tell everyone that). 
02/02 @ 6:46pm
Oh, so you and Rueben Theragun each other, huh? Say more Lieutenant Commander!
02/04 @ 2:45pm
Going to Pete and Penny’s in a bit to watch the Super Bowl! Max is at the game, apparently his golf buddy Jimmy G hooked him up, though he neglected to bring me or Caroline. I feel like you would’ve been his first choice, so take that as a compliment I suppose. Do you guys do anything onboard for it? I have $350 on the 49ers winning by 3. Have a lovely day my darling boy x
02/04 @ 9:30pm
Guess who’s as snug as a bug on a rug in her bed AND $1400 dollars richer? That would be me! When you get home we’re going to Juniper and Ivy, my treat, bubs! x
02/06 @ 4:57am
Awww sweetheart are you gonna sugar mama me again? 
02/06 @ 7:03am
You do know the only reason you’re getting away with that is because there’s an ocean between us, right? 
02/06 @ 6:00pm
Sorry, couldn’t resist! Love you! B
02/06 @ 6:10pm
You’re lucky I love you so much. x
02/08 @ 9:58pm
Can you imagine if I was gone for 20 years?
02/08 @ 10:11pm
Bradley that’s not funny 
02/08 @ 10:13pm
It’s not supposed to be. I’m reading the Odyssey and it got me thinking. 
02/08 @ 10:16pm
Bradley I love you something awful, but you are such an old man sometimes. 
Are you going through some sort of midlife crisis reading the Odyssey while you’re at sea?? Is the Old Man and the Sea next?
(ps i love the thought of you reading in your bunk in your spare time and being so struck by something composed thousands of years ago that you have to email me)
02/08 @ 10:20pm
They wait 20 years to get back to each other - practically half their lives. They miss so many things and barely knew each other before he left, but they’re still so - I don’t even know? They’re just so intent on getting back to the other in Odysseus’s case? While Penelope makes sure there’s something for him to come back to? And I must’ve read this stanza ten times before I had to email you: 
"...the gods cast me upon Ogygia, Calypso's island, home of the dangerous sea nymph with glossy braids, and the goddess took me in in all her kindness, welcomed me warmly, cherished me, even vowed to make me immortal, ageless, all my days - but she never won the heart inside me, never" 
And I know it’s not a perfect comparison or parallel, but I read that last bit and I couldn’t help but think of you? And how you’re the one who won my heart and it’s always going to be that way. Whether I see you in twenty seconds or twenty years.
02/08 @ 10:23pm
You’d come home to me whether it took twenty seconds or twenty years. You’d come home to me and I’d know you anywhere. I love you so much. 
02/08 @ 10:58pm
“Now help me, please, to get back home, and quickly! I miss my family. I have been gone so long it hurts.” 
Your Bradley
02/09 @ 7:03pm
At the airport for London! Taking off! And I may or may not have used points to upgrade to a Club World seat…but like? It’s a nonstop flight, so it’s okay, right? Work’s already paying for business class? It’s points from my work card? It’ll be fine, right?
I had to take an ativan in the lounge. I just hate that I still get so nervous whenever I fly long distance? I fly all the time, I shouldn’t be like this? You know, one time, I pretended you were flying my plane. I know it’s kind of dumb and silly and a completely different type of plane, but it made me feel better because you’d never let anything happen to me. 
Anyway, we’re book buddies!! I went to the bookstore a couple days ago and got a copy! I read the Odyssey back in high school, but forgot so much. I was reading in the lounge and this part made me think of you:
“...this lovely house, my marriage home, so full of wealth and life, which I suppose I will remember even in my dreams.”
I’ll text you when I land my darling boy, love you x
02/10 @ 6:02am
You gotta squeeze every last bit of your per diem out of pwc. You’ve been working way too hard lately. Fuck it, on the way home just put the upgrade on your work card or put it on mine. Have a safe (rest of your) flight - maybe one day you’ll let me take you up. Love Bradley 
02/10 @ 10:08am
Just landed and on my way to the office (already…)
I thought of you as I read and stared out the window on the plane. I could pretend I’m flying towards you, rather than further away. I can’t imagine how you feel doing this everyday, but I imagine it’s like feeling limitless, like everything is in front of you, there for the taking. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll let you take me up one day. 
I’ll keep you posted on how everything’s going if you do the same. All my love x
02/12 @ 5:49am
How’s it going, kid? They working you too hard? You’re in London! Try to enjoy it, you deserve it. One of the guys I’m with gave me a restaurant recommendation for you, said the drinks were amazing, his wife loved it. Do something fun while you’re there! And send me some pictures dammit!
Love you, 
Bradley 
02/12 @ 8:22am
Bradley! It’s been so so crazy here! I feel like I haven’t stopped since I landed. My ‘flat’ is so cute and right by the client’s offices, so it’s an easy commute. I feel so professional taking the Tube places too! It’s one thing I’d like us to have in San Diego as opposed to all the traffic. Also, it’s CHILLY here and I’m so glad I dug my big coat out of storage. I’ll try and check the restaurant out this weekend, I’m gonna sneak in a trip to the Tate, too. I’ve always wanted to see the Turners. Talk soon and love you bunches! x 
02/14 @ 9:54am
Bradley Bradshaw! You absolute SAP! HOW!?! Did you conspire with my dad again? Thank you for the flowers! I’m going to have the biggest smile on my face all day. I love you and hope this is the first of a lifetime of Valentine’s Days together. Always x 
02/14 @ 7:33pm
Happy Valentine’s Day to you too, kid. I’m not gonna lie, I gave your dad very specific instructions for the bouquet (I was going to ask Max, but he’d probably swap it for something ugly and cheap and keep the change…kidding (not)), so I’m glad they turned out well. It was a very big day on board today: we got special red heart cookies for the holiday. The mood was infectious, I can still taste the sprinkles. Maybe you could cook for me on our next Facetime? Have you learned anything good in class lately? It doesn’t have to be fancy, just wanna see you (and maybe also live vicariously through whatever you’re making).  
02/14 @ 7:33pm
Bradley! I think I can swing that for you, when do you think our next call will be? 
02/16 @ 3:18pm
Kid, you spoil me. This package is amazing, I don’t know where to start (just kidding it’s with the Cadbury chocolate and the Sudocrem as my burnt shoulders thank you), but everything is wonderful, thank you. I love hearing about London and seeing the pictures you sent last time. But I do have one complaint…you’re not in any of the pictures, kid, and that’s truly egregious. (Think we won’t be able to Facetime for a while, I gave Payback my slot the other day.)
02/16 @ 3:23pm
That’s not true! I’m in the one in front of the Tate!
02/16 @ 3:25pm
Yeah, but I can’t see you under all those layers! Just want to see your face. It’s been way too long since our last Facetime.
02/16 @ 9:52pm
As requested, Lieutenant Commander. I had one of the girls in the London office take this at dinner tonight. She really did wonders with the lighting and even managed to get my sidecar in the pic! x Love you
02/17 @ 6:55am
You look pretty. New dress? B
02/17 @ 7:17am
Maybe…it was on sale, couldn’t resist. But you’re gonna hate me because all of my clothes are very much not going to fit in your closet. Also, I bought you a new jacket and some socks. x
02/17 @ 7:20am
Ehhh I’m not too worried about the closet thing. But if you keep buying me clothes we might have a problem.
02/17 @ 7:24am
It’s so cute though!! You’re going to look so handsome in it! I got the green one for you!
02/17 @ 7:29am
Okay, admittedly a very nice jacket, thank you. But you are aware that we live in San Diego…
02/17 @ 7:31am
I am aware of that fact, LC Bradshaw. You can wear it when we visit my parents. Hell, I had to get my coat out of my storage closet for this trip. 
02/17 @ 6:53pm
Sighhhhh you raise a good point. Alright, alright, thank you for the jacket and socks my darling girl. What’d you have for dinner last night? We had chicken with these absolutely awful biscuits, tasted like saw dust, my stomach was growling for some more of that Cadbury chocolate (yes, Payback and I ate all of it already, though it was mainly Payback) for hours afterward. 
02/17 @ 6:59pm
Oh my sweet boy! Who do I need to call about your meal plan? Give me the number and I’ll call the Navy up right now. And I had scallops with truffle risotto. It was delicious. Wanted to lick the bowl clean. Love you bubs x
02/19 @ 10:22pm
Bubs, I cannot eat another meal out. I feel like I’m going to burst. I’ve gone to so many work dinners and lunches even before coming here, it almost makes me feel like a glutton. 
I miss you and your cooking (though I’ll have you know that my skills were vastly improving before my trip abroad!) and you standing behind me at the counter while I try to perfectly cut peppers. Sometimes I do it wrong on purpose so you’ll put your arms around me and I can feel the rumble of your voice. Would we call that weaponized incompetence? You better be ready for some Michelin Star meals when you get home, buddy. I just can’t wait to be home with you and roll over next to you in the morning and to tell you to stop snoring and that the battery in the smoke detector needs to be changed. I can’t wait to be home with you and make a life with you. I’m going to be really sappy now, but let me have this because I was reading this poem the other day and thought of you. 
“I am supposed to be touched. I can’t wait to find the person who will come into the kitchen just to smell my neck and get behind me and hug me and breathe me in and make me turn around and make me kiss his face and put my hands in his hair even with my soapy dishwater drips. I am a lovely woman. Who will come into my kitchen and be hungry for me?” (x)
Only a month until you’re home with me, I hope you’re hungry. 
All my love x
02/20 @ 4:50am
It’s only weaponized incompetence if the other person minds. I, however, do not mind. I loved that quote you sent me, going to be thinking about that one for a long time. I hate to tell you this, but I’m gonna be offline for a couple days. I hate that it’s at the end of your trip, but please please message me when you’re leaving/taking off and again when you land, you know I worry. Love you and am so unbelievably proud of you, kid! You killed it in London. Your Bradley
02/20 @ 7:03am
That’s okay, I totally understand. I’ll give you all the details on our next Facetime. In the meantime, I message you when I leave. Stay safe and love you, Bradley! x
02/23 @ 3:45pm
Taking off soon! I got an upgrade again, thankfully! And I made sure to put your new coat in my carry on - I don’t trust British Airways not to lose it! Taking an ativan again so hopefully I’ll sleep the entire flight - love you and talk soon!
02/24 @ 10:33pm
Just landed, slept through….90% of the flight! Apparently, there was bad turbulence, so probably for the best. Now, I know you would never have me deal with that my darling rocketman! Talk later - love you! x
02/25 @ 7:09pm
Feels kind of weird being back? I can’t quite get back into my routine. I’m not sure if it’s jet lag or something else? Feeling a little lost? x
02/26 @ 7:55pm
Bradley!!! You were so good, I’m so so proud of you! Max had everyone over at his place for us to watch you! We have quite the party here including my parents, Pete, Penny and Amelia, Natasha, Mickey and Cielo, Caroline, and Darcy. I’ll have to tell you about the parents meeting later. I wish you had been here for it, they took to each other like bees to honey. 
You looked tragically handsome, I practically had to hold back a moan when you were standing on the flight deck talking to Norah O’Donnell (is she as nice in person as she is on TV?). God, I want to ravish you, you sounded so fucking smart. You know like half the country is going to be in love with you now, right? I’ve got to get back to everyone, Max ordered dinner for us afterwards, but I had to email you as soon as you finished!
Just wanted to let you know how proud of you I am and how much I love you x
02/27 @ 5:09am
Thanks, kid. Sorry it took me a bit to respond, things have been getting a bit crazy, you know, now that I’m a celebrity and all? We’re winding down this training, so the next couple weeks are gonna be full of debriefs and paperwork, which means I should have a more stable schedule. Love you B
02/28 @ 11:48pm
Sometimes I wonder if you were here what would you do? Hold me? Love me? I never feel small except when I’m in your arms. x
02/29 @ 11:48pm
Some nights in bed, if I try really hard, I can imagine I’m laying down next to you. And it makes everything just a little easier. Bradley
03/01 @ 12:56am
I haven’t taken anything besides my fingers in months. You’re going to stretch me out so well when you get home. 
03/01 @ 7:19pm
And I’m gonna mark your ass pink for that comment. I can’t believe you sent that in the middle of the day. You getting yourself off at work? Dirty girl. 
03/01 @ 9:41pm
Never feels as good as when you do it. 
03/01 @ 10:01pm
And my hands pale in comparison to your pretty little cunt. You know that first time we slept together you were so fucking tight, I knew you hadn’t had a good fuck in ages. It gonna be like that again when I come home?
03/01 @ 10:05pm
Where are you going to have me first?
03/01 @ 10:06pm
In our bed, in our house, after you make me dinner in our kitchen. 
03/01 @ 10:09pm
Just over two weeks now, I can’t wait to see you. x
03/03 @ 5:55am
How you holding up, kid? You doing a little better this week work wise? Try and log off around 5 if you can. Don’t want you getting all worn down on me. 
They had us doing these war games yesterday that made me think of you. You would’ve walked circles around some of these other guys I swear. Think I can get a Facetime for us in a couple days? Probably will be our last one before I come home. Love you, B
03/03 @ 7:12am
Bradley! That's the best news I’ve had in ages! I can’t wait to see you! Definitely felt a little lost after coming back from London, but I hope my rut will be over soon? Tying things up with a client is always so lengthy and tedious. 
War games! ‘Would you like to play a game?’ I’d ask if you won, but no one ever wins in the art of war 😉Love you!
03/05 @ 8:54pm
So, here’s a new one. My mom called? She’s going to be stateside and wants to get lunch tomorrow. Could’ve done with a bit more warning, but apparently, she has a layover in San Diego on her way to New York to see my brother? I didn’t even know she was going to see him? I don’t even know if I want to see her? It’s funny, I can already tell you exactly how it’ll play out:
We’ll go to lunch at some sort of vegan restaurant, probably Donna Jean
She’ll make me pay
She’ll try to get me to use some sort of herb to promote weight loss since I’m looking a bit “pudgy” around the face
Though she’ll forget to ask about you, she’ll tell me about her latest string of failed relationships with bartenders and surf instructors in Canggu. Or is it Ubud? I genuinely don’t remember, she started in Ubud, but honestly my knowledge of Balinese geography is rudimentary at best 
She’ll ask how ‘that woman’ is doing as if Mary is just the woman my dad is seeing, not the woman who raised me and my brother
And finally, she’ll ask for money though betting is still open as to what for!
So, what do you say? Wanna put a wager on it? Your terms.
Love you! x
03/06 @ 6:30am
$100 she orders the caesar and makes you pay. I’m not even going to entertain the third parlay, pretty girl. Oddly feeling like she’s got a winner on her hands so yes she’ll talk about her new paramour. Does she really call Mary ‘that woman?’ And yes, without a question, she will ask you for money.
Your move my gorgeous girl,
Bradley
03/06 @ 7:49pm
I really wish you were here right now. She doesn’t even know me, but she somehow always manages to make me feel small. 
Caesar - no croutons 
I paid
Pudgy and frumpy, but she was hawking shakes not herbs
Failed relationship? No, she’s actually GETTING MARRIED
She did not ask about you much other than to say I need to watch my figure for you (see bullet point no. 3)
Mary was called ‘that woman’ six times before I stopped counting
She asked for money as a wedding present 
So, you didn’t get them all, but not a bad showing. Love you. Talk tomorrow on Facetime. x
03/07 @ 6:09am
God kid, I’m so sorry. She doesn’t know what she’s missing. Actually, I don’t even think she deserves to know what she’s missing. Did you talk to your dad or Mary about it? I know we’re talking later, but I just wanted you to have a message from me before you start your day. What’re you wearing to the office tomorrow? Have you worn that polka dot dress with the bow lately? You know it’s one of my favorites and that I always love unwrapping it when you get home from the office. 
Can’t wait to see you tonight. All my love, Bradley
03/07 @ 9:55am
The dress doesn’t fit. My mom was right, I shouldn’t have gotten the french toast.
I’m planning on talking to dad and Mary later today before you and I have our Facetime. I know they’ll make me feel better, much like you have my darling boy, but it still feels pretty crummy. Especially since I’m sure she’s going to have wonderful time in New York with my brother 🙄 and I’ll have to hear all about it next time I talk to him. 
And I’m not sure if I’ve unpacked that dress yet! I’ll have to do some digging. Talk soon! x
03/10 @ 3:26am
We had a little baby. He was always giggling and laughing and we were making silly faces and he looked so small in your arms, Bradley. So small and little and he was ours. And then I turned around and he was toddling around the house and we were chasing him and his little legs were moving so quickly and we all wound up on the couch in a tangle of limbs, giggling under the blankets as we tickled him and he called you daddy. 
It wasn’t our house - or what will be our house, I guess? Instead of the leather couch you have, it was white and big and wide and the three of us could easily fit on it, snuggled together. 
And I could feel your arms around me, rocking me back and forth. I could feel you humming in my ear and kissing my neck and telling me you loved me. I could feel it. I could feel you. I could feel him and you. And it was nice and I felt warm and safe and cherished and loved. Because I felt so much love for this little boy in my arms - the perfect mix of me and you. Everything felt right and perfect. 
Except when I rolled over in bed to tell you about it, I realized I was alone in my bed, in my apartment, and not in the house that we shared or with the little boy that looked so much like you and I haven’t felt so empty and sad since I can’t remember when. 
And I just miss you so much, Bradley. I know I can come across as glib and unfeeling sometimes and like this doesn’t affect me as much. But it does and sometimes I feel like my heart is going to burst because I’ve never felt like this for anyone else before? It’s never been so easy for me to love someone and let them love me to the point that I always want to be beside them. And I know with your job - and mine - that can’t always happen, but god Bradley I wish you were here right now so you could hold me and tell me you loved me because I just want to feel your arms around me and know you’re real. I want to tell you about the little boy - the perfect mix of me and you. 
I love you rocketman x
03/11 @ 12:49pm
I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. I realize that’s a lot to drop on you, especially since we can’t talk in person. I guess I’ve just never missed a person more in my life and seeing that future showed me what we could have when you come home. God, Bradley I want you to come home so badly. I want you to stay here with me forever and never leave and to have that cute little boy who was the perfect mix of me and you and to have you here in my arms every night. And I know it’s selfish of me to ask or even make you think about it, but I want you right here - in twenty seconds, not twenty years. 
How did your hop go today? x
03/11 @ 7:03pm
I have dreams like that, too. I’ll be little, but still older than I was when my dad died and we’ll be at the beach, running around, and he’ll pick me up and spin me around like I’m flying on an airplane. 
But then it’ll be me and my kid, running around and I’ll pick them up and spin them around like they’re flying on an airplane. Sometimes it’s a girl, sometimes a little boy. But I always just can feel and tell that I love them and I’d do anything for them. 
And I used to hate waking up alone after I had them and I’d feel empty and sad and like I had the feeling that they should still be there? Except now I have you and I know it doesn’t just have to be a dream?
Sorry it took me so long to reply. Today was hectic and I didn’t get to check my email until later. But if I checked it earlier, my day would’ve been a lot easier on my heart. 
All my love,
Your Bradley
03/12 @ 7:11pm
How do you always know exactly what to say? I’m sorry for springing that all on you, know it wasn’t exactly a quick/easy message, but I love that you knew exactly what I meant. My day’s always a lot easier on my heart when I hear from you, too. Love you x
03/13 @ 10:17pm
i miss having you around to take care of me. and telling me what to do and what to wear for you and how you want me and where you want me and when you want me and and and. and how good i feel around you as you come, how you take what’s yours. how i need you to take control and tell me what i need because i’m too much of a dumb slut to figure it out on my own. i need you so much bradley. and it’s so hard because i’m trying to take care of myself like you do and imagine what you’d do if you were with me right now. but i’m so frustrated since no one takes care of me like you do. i feel so empty. nothing stretches me out like you do, nothing makes me feel as small as you do, nothing makes me flush like the sound of your voice against my neck as i come, nothing soothes the ache inside me like you do. need you to call me good girl, pretty girl, sweet girl, anything as long as it’s yours. 
i need you i need you i need you i need you bradley bradley bradley bradley
3/13 @ 10:39pm
Awwww sweetheart, did you get yourself all worked up over me? It’s okay, I know it’s hard for you all by yourself. Must’ve been real bad for you to risk this getting flagged, huh? Poor thing, don’t worry, I’ll take care of you. 
Want you to pretend I’m next to you, leaning over you as you lay down and touch yourself. Say yes Bradley, more Bradley. Bradley, Bradley, Bradley. Good girl. 
Want you naked under the covers, no frilly little pajama set or anything. No, I want your cum to stain the sheets and then for you to have to clean up in the morning, all embarrassed because you did this. You made yourself like this because you can’t control yourself without me around. All that cum being wasted. Nobody around to lick it off your pussy. So what doesn’t get on the sheets, you have to taste. Good girl. 
Want you to use your fingers - only your fingers, I’ll know if you use anything else. Start with your breasts. Think of how perfectly they fit in my hands and how yours aren’t quite the same. They aren’t as big. Aren’t as strong. Play with your nipples, drag your nails across the soft skin on the underside of your breasts.
Want you to sigh my name as you slide your hands down your stomach towards your pretty little pussy. Have you shaved? Gotten a wax? You know how I like it, want it just like that when I get home. Pretend it’s my fingers sliding into your cunt. A few touches and you’re already clenching on air and I’m not even around. 
In and out, in and out. Circle your clit with your thumb. Add another finger, then another. You rocking your hips yet? I know you’re soaked. I know you want more. Three fingers can’t stretch you out nearly as much as you need. But I don’t know if you can handle anything else without me around. And I know you would never disagree with me, right? Because you’re my good girl and good girls do what they’re told. 
Don’t hesitate to get loud. You’re in our house, in our bed, you can be as loud as you want. Bet you’re getting close, huh? Try and last a little longer, can you hear yourself and how wet you are? Are you shaking yet? I know you’re close. Go ahead, speed up your fingers, just the way I do. It’s okay, you can come. Know you’re gonna get sleepy soon, wish I could sleep inside you, nice and tight.
Now say thank you Bradley. Good girl. 
03/14 @ 5:49pm
Thank you, Bradley. Thank you for taking care of me last night 
You like chicken piccata, right?
03/14 @ 7:33pm
Yeah, kid, I like chicken piccata. 
03/14 @ 7:39pm
Okay, that’s good. I’m going to make it when you come home. I ran it by my cooking instructor. Ina’s recipe of course. 
(I’ve read your email seven times since you sent it. I’ve thought about it constantly. I want you to take me softly and slowly that first time. But after that? I can’t wait to let go and float. Love you so much x)
03/15 @ 6:09am
You’re the boss. Good thing I’ll be home soon, you’re gonna run out of material. As is, I had to type that last one with one hand. 
Love you,
B
03/15 @ 7:21am
I’ll be good till you get home, promise. 
Have a good day, do you think we’ll get to talk much from now till Friday? Love you x
03/15 @ 7:24am
I’ll hold you to it. 
I don’t think so, might be able to send one out before leaving the boat. Better make it a good one. 
All my love
Your Bradley 
03/15 @ 7:25am
You got it! Love you bubs 
03/18 @ 11:08pm
Kid - there’s this lyric that keeps running through my head: ‘and I want you right here.’ I want you beside me - today, tomorrow, all my days. I want you right here, beside me forever. In twenty seconds, not twenty years. See you tomorrow.
All my love,
Your Bradley
03/18 @ 11:11pm
See you tomorrow, rocketman. I’ll be the one in blue.
Love you x
a/n: thanks for reading! i'll be back with part ii and part iii (hopefully not in...4 months). i had so much fun writing these and getting to explore a different format and side to their relationship! thanks to alexa @sometimesanalice, kylie @ofstoriesandstardust, cass @notroosterbradshaw, elle @dissonannce, nik @cherrycola27, and loren @heartsofminds for all the support!
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lvis44 · 9 months
Text
Sweet Escape - Epilogue // LH44
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Lewis Hamilton x Y/N
Warnings: Smut 18+ MINORS DNI, Alcohol Consumption, Swearing, Light Angst, Not Edited
Word Count: 9.4k+
Summary: Paradise is supposed to be fun and relaxing... a Sweet Escape, but when unspoken feelings and jealousy rise to the surface, everything can be turned upside down in the blink of an eye.
Notes: Alas, here is the long awaited Epilogue. Thank you everyone for being patient with me, this became a bit of its own story and I had to stop myself from continuing (read my note at the end and let me know your opinions, I won't ask here as to not spoil anything.) I have loved writing this and I can't wait to continue this little journey with all of you wonderful babes. Thank you so much for all the love on this story, I'm glad you all seem to love it as much as I do!
I am not a professional writer and all of this is a work of fiction and is strictly for fun. Enjoy! xxx
Previous Sections: Prologue - Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven - Part Eight
Colorado was one of your favorite places to be with Lewis, especially when it was just the two of you. You spent so much of your relationship flying around the world and stealing moments to be alone together. It could be difficult at times, especially race weekends. Lewis had a tendency to become a different version of himself from the first step into the paddock on Thursday to the second he left on Sunday evening, there was a hard shell around him most of the time, determined and focused. It was never a bad thing, simply something to navigate. He always found ways to make sure you knew how grateful for you he was, even in the simplest ways. When you would both arrive in Colorado, tucked away in the mountains, every guard he had built would come down, it’s when you got the utmost access to the love of your life. That's why you were shocked when he had sent you your travel plans for the week. You had talked with him multiple times about meeting him in Colorado for his time off, spending time just the two of you after too long being apart. Without consulting you he had changed your plans, scheduling another family trip, another trip to the Caribbean. You hadn’t been back to the island since the beginning of your relationship, almost exactly a year ago. Your anniversary would be coming up in the next week and you wanted to spend it with him, however life and work got in the way, forcing you to be apart from him for an already two week stretch. That is why Colorado had been the perfect plan, just the two of you only a few days after your anniversary, now you would be with all your friends in a place you had many mixed emotions about. You understood that he didn’t have the same opportunities to see everyone, rarely being in town for parties and dinners, but selfishly you truly didn’t want to share him. 
The second you received the surprise email with your travel itinerary you were on the phone. It only rang once before he picked up.
“Hey baby, I’ve only got a second. What's up?” He sounded out of breath through the line and you wondered if you had interrupted his training, not that you cared at the moment.
“We’re going to the island?” You got straight to the point.
“Yeah, I mean I bought the house, we might as well use it.” He chuckled, ignoring the fact that your plans had been drastically changed. 
“I know that, but I thought we had plans.” Your voice came out whinier than you had meant it to, unable to hide your disappointment.
“Yeah, shit, I’m sorry babe. I meant to talk to you about it but Charlotte and Miles were on my ass about another family trip and I just scheduled everything for the next second I had off.” He tried to reason, not helping your disappointment. It was strange for him to not consult you about plans he was making, more often than not he would check in with you more than necessary. 
“I know you want to see everybody but I wanted to spend time with you, celebrate our anniversary together.” You knew you were fighting a losing battle, everything was set in stone and he wouldn't disappoint your friends.
“We’ll still be together sweetie, we’ll have more than enough time to celebrate our anniversary, I promise.” His words were soft and you could tell he was trying to end the conversation. There was no point in continuing the argument.
“I know, I know, I just miss you.” You conceded.
“I miss you too, more than you know, but in just over a week I’m all yours. Gonna give you the biggest fucking hug.” He sighed, also feeling the effects of not being together.
‘You’re not going to be all mine, that's the problem’ you thought to yourself, deciding not to say anything, it wouldn’t help the situation in any way.
Before you could respond he was already saying his goodbyes, “I gotta go, m’sorry, but I’ll call you later and I’ll see you soon. I love you sweetheart.”
“I love you Lew.” You said solemnly, wishing for just a few more moments with him, even if over the phone.
The next week and a half dragged on for what felt like a year, communication from him was slim, even on your anniversary. He had messaged you a picture of the two of you from a few months ago, it was a selfie taken in some random hotel overseas, you were pressed up against him with your face in his neck, a massive smile across both of your faces. His message had been simple and cheeky “Thank you for giving me a chance and putting up with me for a whole ass year, I love you more than I could ever let you know xx.” When you messaged him back it had gone unanswered. You couldn’t understand what was going on with him, his lack of communication was incredibly out of character and it was starting to irritate you.
By the time that you arrived at the large vacation house, your mood was sour. Your flight was long and lonely, your friends flying out at different times and from different places. When you arrived everyone was already there. You were irritated with Lewis and his lack of communication and care for the wrench in your plans. Seeing the house again as you pulled into the driveway brought very mixed emotions, on one hand it was the place you finally found the love of your life, on the other it was the place where you spent a week fighting with your best friend and thinking that you had lost him. When you stepped out of the car, Lewis was already there waiting for you, a big smile on his face and open arms ready for you.
“Well hello there pretty lady.” He said, engulfing you in a hug before you even had the chance to close the car door.
It was hard to stay mad at him as he wrapped himself around you, his embrace feeling like coming home. He buried his face into your neck as he squeezed you so hard you thought you were going to burst.
“Hi.” You answered softly, taking in his familiar scent.
When he finally pulled away he didn’t go far, his large palms coming up to cradle your cheeks. His smile was so big it looked like his face would split in two.
“God I fucking missed you.” He sighed before pulling you in for a heavy kiss. It was like he was trying to pour every kiss you would have received in the last few weeks into one.
You're not sure how long you stood there kissing him, enjoying being with your partner after way too long. It wasn’t until you heard a gagging sound from behind you that you pulled away from him.
“Jesus, I’m all for you two being in love and shit but damn, I don’t need to see all that.” Miles complained from behind you while grabbing your bags.
“Oh fuck off, I haven’t seen my girl in two weeks, I’ve got shit to make up for.” Lewis laughed, his hand coming down to firmly grab your ass.
“Two weeks? I ain’t seen you in two months, where the hell is my kiss?” Miles continued in a jokingly distraught voice.
“Come and get it.” Lewis teased him, puckering his lips like a child, still not letting go of you.
“I’d rather kiss a frog,” Miles deadpanned, “now let go of Y/N so I can give her a hug.”
Lewis very reluctantly parted from you, not going far as Miles wrapped his broad frame around you, squeezing you tight with a kiss to your head that made you giggle. The second Miles let you go, Lewis was already grabbing your hand, lacing his fingers with yours and giving it a squeeze. When you turned to look at him he was already staring at you, a soft smile on his face and a look in his eyes you couldn’t quite place. You gave him a questioning look but all he did was shake his head and lean down to peck your lips quickly before ushering you into the house after Miles.
‘Well look who’s finally here!” Charlotte's voice came through the kitchen loudly the moment she saw you.
It only took a few seconds before you were wrapped in yet another tight hug, as if you hadn’t seen her only a week ago. You two had gotten lunch shortly after Lewis had changed your plans, and while you didn’t want to complain to her, you did try to get any information possible as to why Lewis had been acting so strange. She hadn’t said much, simply brushing it off by saying he must be busier than usual, but you could tell she knew something else and it had been eating away at you.
After saying your hellos to everyone you found a moment to quietly excuse yourself from the kitchen, heading down the hall to the room Lewis had stayed in last time, the room you had ended up moving into the night you finally got together. When you got to the doorway you paused, seeing unfamiliar luggage in the room. You had traveled with Lewis enough at this point to pick his luggage out from the most packed carousel in the world, and his was nowhere to be seen, neither was yours. As you stood there confused, a pair of strong arms came around your waist, pulling you back against a firm, warm body. You turned in his arms, his chocolate brown eyes coming into view.
“Sorry, I forgot to mention we’re not staying in here, Miles and his girlfriend are.” Lewis said softly.
You had met Miles’ girlfriend a few times now and you had to say she was one of the sweetest people he could have ever found. You were very happy for him but at this moment you were slightly irked at that concept.
“Not to sound like a bitch, but really?” You said with a huff, making Lewis chuckle.
“Babe, it’ll-” He started but you cut him off.
“No, Lew, I mean, it’s your house and we’re supposed to be celebrating our anniversary. I don’t even want to be here, I wanted to be in Colorado with you and just you but I didn’t want to sound ungrateful or anything. I know you don’t get to see everybody all that often but I feel like you don’t even care that it’s our first anniversary together, it seems like it’s an after thought for you, if it’s even a thought at all.” You rambled your emotions to him quietly, not wanting to offend anyone.
Lewis frowned, his brows furrowed in concern, “Hun, I absolutely care, and I’m sorry for changing our plans like that,” He paused, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, “but if you’d let me show you something I think you might change your mind about being here, just a little bit.”
You let out a sigh, shrugging, still not fully feeling like your anniversary was a priority to him.
“Hey, look at me, we’re going to have an incredible anniversary week together, in the place we first admitted we were in love with each other. There’s a part of the property I didn’t get to show you last time we were here, come with me and then you can decide if you still hate the idea of celebrating here.” He didn’t wait for an answer, grabbing your hands and urging you to follow him.
“Are we gonna see you two again tonight?” Charlotte called out teasingly as Lewis pulled you through the back doors.
“Maybe, maybe not, don’t count on it.” Lewis yelled back over his shoulder with a laugh.
You gave him another questioning look but he just told you to hurry up and pulled you quicker behind him. He took you to the forest, near the path you’d always taken down to the beach but this time veered off on a different small path that you had never really noticed the last time you were here. You were now walking next to him, his hand firmly grasping yours as you started to see a trail of sparkling lights illuminating the small path as the sun was going down.
“Watch your step love, there’s a few steps down right here.” Lewis’ voice pulled you out of the trance you had fallen into while admiring the pretty lights.
He held your hand while you took the few steps down before he wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you under his arm, making your walk slightly clumsy.
“I know you would rather we were in Colorado, just the two of us, and I’m sorry, I really am. I wasn’t thinking when I booked this trip in all honesty, and I know that sounds bad, Charlotte yelled at me as soon as she saw the dates. Just, I wasn’t really thinking about the fact that it was our anniversary, it doesn’t feel like it could possibly be our one year because I feel like we’ve been together forever. So I know I fucked up, but I’ve also had this plan for bringing you back here for quite a while and I’ll be honest when Miles mentioned coming here for vacation I jumped on the opportunity, I needed to. And I know this isn’t exactly what you envisioned or what I promised and I’m sorry for that but I was hoping that maybe this could be our little sanctuary, make us forget that anyone else even exists.” Lewis’ apology is sweet but leaves you with more questions, wanting to know what his need to be back here so badly was.
You round the corner with him, walking out onto a part of the beach you hadn’t seen before, nestled into an alcove you hadn’t previously explored. That's when you see a small bridge, leading to the most beautiful bungalow sitting atop the water. You gasp, seeing it lit up with beautiful lights, making it sparkle.
“It’s technically supposed to be the guest house,” Lewis begins quietly, “but I figured it could be our little vacation from the group vacation. Somewhere it can be just us.”
You turn toward him, your eyes glassy, “It’s beautiful Lew, thank you.” You lean up to press your lips against his softly.
“Another bonus is you can be as loud as you want down here.” He whispers cheekily against your lips, pecking them once more.
“Lewis!” You laugh, swatting at his chest as you blush.
He catches your wrist with a big smile, pressing a kiss to your pulse point before grabbing your hand and pulling you along down to the bungalow.
“God, do we have to hike it all the way back up there to get our luggage?” You groan, realizing you have nothing with you.
“Nope,” Lewis laughs, “Miles decided to be helpful and already lugged it all down here, I unfortunately owe him.”
When he opened the door, you found yourself speechless. There was a small kitchen directly through the front door, nothing fancy but enough that you would never have to leave if you didn’t want to. As you walked past the kitchen and down the short hallway the room opened up. There was a bathroom with a large shower and a large soaker tub to your right and a lush king size bed to your left. Large windows lined the whole left side of the bungalow, a small seating area just below them. Straight ahead of you were large sliding doors that Lewis was already moving to open, once he did, the whole front wall was open.
“There’s a screen we can shut if it gets too buggy but I want you to see it like this first.” Lewis explained, already knowing you would be worried about strange bugs in your bed.
He outstretched his hand to you once again, pulling you out onto the patio. What you were met with amazed you even more than the inside. There was a hot tub off to the side, already bubbling away, more sparkling fairy lights lining the pergola that covered part of the patio. There were two large chaise lounges overlooking the endless view of the sea. He was already guiding you down another small set of stairs where you were met with a small infinity pool, just beside the pool was an outdoor shower. You spotted another set of steps that appeared to go off directly into the sea.
“Babe, it’s-” You were at a loss for words as you turned to him, not quite knowing how to sum up how incredible everything was.
He smiled, stepping in front of you and placing his large hands on your waist, “I know it’s not exactly what you envisioned, but I do want this to be special. I’m so sorry I fucked up our first anniversary, I promise I’ll do better with every single one to come.”
“It’s not what I envisioned, and I am still annoyed you forgot our anniversary,” You tease before becoming more serious, “but Lew, this is perfect, it’s beautiful. Thank you.”
“Hey, I didn’t actually forget, it was a momentary lapse in judgment.” He playfully defends himself, pulling you closer to him.
“Whatever you say mister,” You laugh, “but I love it. I love you.”
He wastes no time in pressing his lips to yours, mumbling “I love you too, so much more than words could ever explain.”
“As much as I want to stay right here and kiss you forever, I really want to take a shower, I feel disgusting from all the flying.” You say when you finally separate from him.
“How about I run us a bath and we cuddle up and start to enjoy our belated anniversary celebrations.” He suggests, having you immediately nodding.
“Okay, you stay here and enjoy the view, I’ll come get you in a minute.” He says, squeezing your hip as he presses a kiss to your temple.
As he makes his way back up to the bungalow you settle into one of the comfy chairs overlooking the beautiful view. There’s still a slight annoyance in the back of your head at his admission of not even thinking of your anniversary when he planned this trip but you can’t help but be grateful that you will at least have him to yourself in some way this week. It may not be exactly what you had envisioned but you’re just happy that you will get to spend time with him. You understand what he was saying earlier, it doesn’t seem like it should be your one year anniversary, you truly feel like you’ve been with him forever. You practically live together, the most you possibly can with his ridiculous schedule. You’ve loved him far longer than you’ve been with him, and you’ve had the support and care of a partner from him since the day you met him. You know you’re going to be with him forever, nothing else would make sense, you could never fathom the idea of not being his now that you have him. You get lost in your thoughts as you wait for him, staring out over the beautiful ocean as you play through memories of your relationship like a highlight reel in your head. The first time he took you on a romantic getaway, the first time he introduced you as his girlfriend to his family, your first christmas together, your birthdays. Everything about him has felt like a fairytale.
“Hey baby, the bath is ready.” His soft voice startles you with its close proximity, you hadn’t even noticed him sit down on the arm of the chair next to you.
He chuckles when you jump, soothing his palm over your back, “Off in your own little world, were ya?”
“Oh shush, I was just enjoying the view.” You laugh along with him, moving to get up and follow him to the bathroom.
When you step into the bathroom you find yourself speechless yet again. The tub is up against a large window you hadn’t noticed earlier, giving you a spectacular view. He’s opened the window to let the warm breeze in, making the flames of the candles he’s placed around the room flicker in the wind. He has soft music playing and the tub is full to the brim with bubbles that smell like heaven. The lights are off except for a small light giving off hues of sunset, dimly illuminating the room. His hands are on your hips from behind, hiking up your shirt as he places soft kisses along your shoulder. He crouches down ever so slightly, kissing your spine as he pulls down your shorts and panties all at once. He places the softest of kisses to the back of your thighs before standing once more. When you turn to undress him, he’s already taken his shirt off, leaving you to push his shorts down his toned thighs, chuckling when you see he’s gone commando. He just shrugs, giving you a cheeky smirk before pulling you in to kiss him tenderly. For a moment you wonder if you will even make it to the bath as his hands roam your body, taking handfuls of the flesh that he loves to knead in his large palms. He eventually parts from you, leaving soft pecks all over your face before stepping around you and sinking down into the tub with a soft sigh. He simply stares at you for a moment, his face showing nothing but love and adoration, finally he outstretches his hand to help you in.
You lean back against his chest, reveling in the feeling of the firm muscles under his soft skin. His chin hooks over your shoulder, placing a kiss to your cheek as his arms snake around your waist to pull you in closer to him.
“Happy anniversary my love.” He whispers against your skin before he’s reaching over the edge of the tub to grab two glasses of champagne you hadn’t noticed before. He hands you one, clinking his glass against yours before rubbing his nose along your jaw up to your ear, “This has been one of the worst seasons of my career, yet one of the best years of my life, only thanks to you. You have made me happier than I ever knew possible and I hope that I have been able to reciprocate that for you. I plan on spending every day trying to make you the happiest, most loved woman on the face of this earth, because that is all that you deserve in life. You are the most remarkable human I have ever had the honor of meeting, Y/N. Thank you for letting me love you, and thank you for loving me the way that you do.”
By the end of his speech there are tears in your eyes. Looking at him you see the same glassiness mirrored in his own, knowing just how much he meant each and every word he whispered into your ear.
“I love you more than life itself Lewis, and I will never stop loving you. I’m sorry I was moody earlier, I was being petty. All I need to be happy is you, as long as you’re around, I am the happiest I can ever be. I’m already the happiest woman on earth simply because I get to say that I am loved by you, it’s truly something I don’t think I could ever explain to anyone. Thank you for all of this, it’s perfect, truly.” You tell him sincerely, your voice thick with emotion.
“Don’t apologize sweetheart, you had every reason to be annoyed with me. I hope you know it wasn’t remotely intentional, and I should have talked to you about it, even if it was after I’d made the plans. I’m sorry I’ve been a bit MIA this past week.” He further apologizes, holding your eyes with his to show just how serious he is.
You can see the remorse written across his face, never one that was good at hiding his emotions once he’s let them be seen for the first time. It’s as if once the floodgates that are Lewis’ emotions are opened to you, there is no closing it, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. He wears his heart on his sleeve.
“Have you been okay?” You ask him, adjusting in his lap so you can look at him better, bringing your hand up to stroke the short stubble at the side of his jaw.
He furrows his brows in question, “Yeah, I’ve been fine. I’ve just been really busy these last few weeks, been planning something that I need to get perfect.”
“Oh? And what exactly have you been planning Sir Hamilton?” You ask him jokingly, yet always wanting to know what he’s working on, always interested in the amazing things he does.
He looks down, averting his eyes from you, looking suddenly shy, “You’ll see when the time’s right, soon, I promise.”
“Mm’kay.” You hum out, taking a sip of your champagne before nuzzling into his chest, resting your head on his shoulder.
He just chuckles, the sound vibrating through your body, tightens his arm around you to rest his cheek on the top of your head.
“I love you, happy one year.” He whispers to you.
“I love you, happy one year.” You repeat as you grin into the skin on his neck, placing a chaste kiss there.
If anyone had asked you how you thought you would be spending your one year anniversary with the love of your life, this would have never been your answer. The two of you cuddled in the warm bath, listening to the sound of the waves crashing, hidden away from your friends in your own private Caribbean bungalow. You had expected him to make a move while you were in the tub, but he didn’t, leaving you slightly shocked but not entirely disappointed. You hadn’t seen him in nearly three weeks and you could feel him pressed against your leg, hard and begging to be touched, it was unlike the two of you to not immediately pounce on one and other the second you were alone. Yet something about the moment with him in the tub felt more intimate than sex ever could, the two of you just enjoying being in each other's arms, each other’s presence, knowing you had more than enough time to reunite later on.
“Where do you want to be in five years?” Lewis asked quietly, breaking the comfortable silence as his hand traced slow circles on your hip.
“Five years?” You asked, lifting your head to look at him.
“Yeah.” He shrugged like he was trying to play it off as a casual question, his face giving him away.
“Well,” You start, pausing to think a bit, “I want to be with you-”
“Well obviously.” He cut you off with a playful smirk.
“Hey, you didn’t let me finish.” You laugh.
“Sorry, I’m usually good about that,” He winks, “continue.”
“Idiot,” You mumble through a laugh before continuing, “I want to be happy, surrounded by people I love. I’d like to be in a different job, I think, something where I have more flexibility. I just want to be someone that me now would be proud of.”
He smiles fondly at you, evidently content with your answer.
“What about you?” You prompt him, genuinely curious.
“I think I want to be done with racing, moving on to a new chapter of my life, with you by my side obviously.” He says quietly.
“You really think you’ll be done in five years? I know you’ve mentioned it before but, do you really think so?” You ask.
“Yeah, we’ve been going over my contract a lot these last few weeks and I think my mind is finally set. I obviously want to get the eighth title, but if that doesn’t happen in the next five years, maybe it was never meant to.” He explains.
“It’s always been meant to, if anyone can it’s you Lew.” You argue.
“I don’t mean that in a way of me giving up, I’m gonna fight like hell until the last possible second. I just mean that maybe now there are more important things for me to start focusing on, other purposes out there for me where my attention and time will be more valuable.” The way he says his words sounds like he’s talking about much more than a career change and it makes your stomach flip in anticipation, imagining your future with him.
“Whatever you end up doing, I’m positive it will be incredible, everything you do is tremendous. And I will be right there supporting you the entire way.” You tell him sincerely, leaning in to press your lips to his.
The kiss is slow and savoring, it mutes everything in your head, making the world revolve around him and only him.
“The water’s starting to get a bit cold, why don’t we get out. I’ve got some ways I can warm you up.” He murmurs against your lips.
“There he is.” You laugh, pulling away.
“What do you mean?” He giggles.
“You’ve been rock hard against my leg for the last thirty minutes and haven’t made a single move on me, I was starting to get worried about you.” You tease him.
“Oh, believe me, I’m well aware of how hard I’ve been.” He playfully rolls his eyes, “I was trying to be romantic.”
“Mmmm, I see.” You hum.
“Genuinely though, I was just enjoying cuddling with you, didn’t want to ruin the moment. But I need you. Now.” His voice gets lower as he finishes his statement, picking you up and standing abruptly.
His quick movement makes water slosh over the edge of the tub, causing you to squeal. He grabs a towel, not using it to dry either of you off but throws it down on the bed before dropping you on top of it.
“You know we could have done this exactly where we were?” You laugh at him as he crowds up against you, already placing hungry kisses down your jaw.
“Maybe, yeah, but it would be a bit hard to pin you down in the tub, I don't really want to drown the woman that I love.” He chuckles against you, grabbing your wrists to bring them above your head.
This is one of the things you’ve always loved with Lewis. You can be in the middle of something so erotic and intimate, yet still be laughing and making jokes with him. He truly is your best friend in the form of a lover.
His lips are trailing down your bare skin, causing your laughter to halt and goosebumps to erupt over your whole body. He doesn’t take even a moment to tease you, immediately diving into your core, licking a hot stripe from your opening all the way to your nerves. You gasp as you arch into him, a throaty groan coming from deep inside him. He always wears you out when you’ve been apart for some time, as if he’s making up for lost time.
“Always taste so fucking good. God I missed you.” He mumbles against your heat, the sound vibrating through your body.
He works his tongue in the way only he knows how, circling your clit perfectly before sucking it into his mouth, nibbling just enough to have your toes curling. You feel one of his fingers slip into you, already soaking wet from just being so close to him. His finger curls, expertly finding the spongy spot inside of you that he knows so well.
“Fuck, Lewis, yes, right there.” You breathe out, your head tilting back into the towel underneath you.
He slips a second finger in, scissoring them to get you ready for him, before returning to a steady ‘come hither’ motion inside of you. He knows he needs you to come at least once before he finally takes you, it’s been too long and he never wants you to be uncomfortable, and he’s doing everything in his power to get you there. Fast.
“That feel good babygirl? You missed me making you feel good?” He asks, already knowing the answer from your flushed cheeks and mouth hung open.
All you can do to respond is moan and buck your hips up toward him, your ability to speak already gone from the moment he put his lips on you.
“Yeah pretty girl? You been trying to make yourself feel good while I’ve been gone?” He continues with his questions, evidently enjoying how difficult it is for you to respond as his thumb finds your clit, flicking quickly.
You nod, turning your head to the side as you let out a loud moan when a third finger slips inside of you.
“Poor baby, it doesn’t feel this good does it? Doesn’t feel as good as me inside of you, can’t make yourself cum the way I can?” He’s moved up so he’s hovering above you, his fingers still working overtime to get you to your peak.
You feel your stomach tighten at his words, knowing he’s right, and then your orgasm rips through your body, soaking his hand. He barely lets up with his movements as he works you through it, kissing your throat, your cheek, your forehead, anywhere his lips can land to work you down from your high.
“You know how I know it’s not the same?” He asks, his voice deep and filled with lust.
You hum, barely able to keep your eyes open.
“Because it’s never the same for me either. No matter how many times I wrap my hand around my cock, it will never come close to the feeling of being inside you. Nothing makes me feel the way you do, nothing will ever come close. I always need you, nothing but you.” His words are mumbled against your skin as he draws his lips up your neck before finally attaching them to your own.
You don’t know where you find the strength but you manage to wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him impossibly close as you open your mouth for him. He licks into your mouth, his tongue toying with your own as he rests most of his weight on you, something that you have grown to love. You find yourself bringing one of your hands down in between the two of you, grasping his hard cock. He groans into your mouth at the simple touch, evidently pent up from the time in the tub. You work him in slow strokes, savoring the feeling of his silky, hot skin. Your thumb swiping over his swollen tip to collect the leaking precum. He whimpers at the feeling, his head falling into the crook of your neck before he's grabbing your wrist.
“Y/N, baby, I’m gonna need you to stop or I’m gonna cum before I even get the chance to be inside of you.” His voice sounds pained as he pins your wrist up next to your head.
Within seconds he’s readjusting and you feel the fat head of his cock pressed against your opening. He stares deep into your eyes as he pushes in slowly, both of your mouths falling open in pure ecstasy at the feeling of finally being connected. It’s truly a feeling like no other, it feels like coming home after a long stressful week, it feels like falling into the comfiest bed, like being wrapped in a hug by someone you love. It completes you. His forehead falls to rest against your own as he stills inside of you, finally bottomed out.
“Please.” You whimper, bringing your legs up around his hips.
He lowers himself down onto you, bracing himself on his forearms on either side of your head, “I’ve got you baby, I know.”
Slowly he starts to pull out before thrusting back in with a certain force that quenches every need in your body. You grasp his bicep next to your head, your hand not able to reach all the way around it. He’s crowded over you, making you feel small and fragile, his strong broad frame engulfing you entirely. With every thrust he has your head spinning more and more. His eyes are trained on your face, always obsessed with seeing how you fall apart underneath him. His calculated, practiced moves make sure you will do just that. You can see the veins starting to pop out in his strong neck, using all his restraint to not cum before you, his whimpers becoming more frequent. You aren’t prepared, unaware you were so close to your orgasm, when it shoots through your body, even more violent than the first.
“Fuck, squeezing me so tight Y/N, I’m gonna-” His words are cut off with a guttural moan, his thrusts becoming sloppy before he’s spilling into you. Hot spurts of cum lacing your walls as you feel him twitch inside of you, a feeling you’ve become obsessed with.
He’s still pulsing inside of you as he relaxes down onto your body, momentarily crushing you but you welcome it, finding some semblance of strength to rub your fingers up and down his back. He peppers kisses along your neck, mumbling sweet nothings that you can’t hear through the ringing in your ears. The first thing you hear as you come back into yourself is a mumbled “I love you”. You lay there together, his weight bearing down on you as he stays deep inside of you, a frequent occurrence after time away, never ready to part from each other. Finally after some time he raises up to slip out of you, making you wince.
“I know baby, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He’s whispering, pressing light kisses to your cheek.
“I’ve really missed you these last few weeks.” You confess to him, your post orgasm brain feeling more open than usual.
“I know sweetie, I’ve missed you like crazy too. I’m sorry it was so long this time.” He says, kneeling in front of you, massaging your thighs.
You take a moment to admire him. A few of his braids have fallen from their usual bun, framing his beautiful face. The moon is shining in through the open window behind him, making him glow as though he truly is an angel placed on earth. His tattoos are dark against his tan skin, swirling black that you’ve spent hours tracing as you fall asleep or wait for him to wake up. He is your person and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Look, I know we just took a bath, but what if we hop in the shower really quick and get properly cleaned up and then I can make us a snack.” He offers, pulling at your ankle.
You just nod, letting him maneuver you up and out of the bed and into the shower. While this may not be the anniversary you had expected with him, you are more than content in this moment, just happy to be with the man that you love, and that loves you so much.
. . .
The moment you arrived back up at the main house you had been teased endlessly for not coming back up the night before. You had blushed like a highschooler but Lewis seemed proud, not having a care in the world that all of your friends were well aware how you two had spent the night.
“Ya know what? It’s our anniversary week, let us fuck in peace.” He had said pointedly at Charlotte when she had finally gotten on his nerves.
You felt bad for Miles' girlfriend, Cleo. She hadn’t spent much time with the group before, much less Lewis, and was evidently unprepared for just how little filter there was with everyone. She sat at the island with wide eyes as Lewis and Charlotte bantered about your sex life. You had shot her an apologetic smile as you tried to redirect your boyfriend onto a new topic. After that the day went smoothly. You ended up laying around the pool, everyone occasionally going for a swim or throwing around a football, just enjoying finally being away from their hectic lives.
You ended up sitting with Cleo for a little while, hoping to get to know her a little bit better. You already quite liked her, finding her to be a great fit for Miles. If she was dating your boyfriend's bestfriend you only found it fitting that you learn a little bit about her. You ended up chatting for quite some time, noticing that both Lewis and Miles would glance at you both from time to time, content smiles on their faces that their girls were getting along so well.
“Miles really likes you, ya know?’ Cleo had said, surprising you.
“I hope so, he’s one of my best friends.” You laughed.
“Well yeah,” She laughed with you, “but I mean for Lewis, if that makes sense.”
You gave her a questioning look, urging her to continue.
“He talks a lot about how glad he is that you two are together, that he’s never seen Lewis this happy.” She continued, “I don’t really know Lewis that well, I’ve only met him like twice, but from what I can see he really loves you. Nobody looks at somebody like that unless they’re head over heels.”
Her words made you blush, not expecting her to say something like that, “I really love him too.”
“I can tell.” Cleo responded with a smile.
“Alright, who’s ready to go out and get drunk?” Steph yelled from behind you, ending your conversation with Cleo.
Your mind immediately flashed back to the last time you had all been at the islands club together. You couldn’t help but wonder if Miles and Lewis would even be allowed back in. Your eyes flicked over to Lewis who was rolling his eyes and already making his way over to you.
“I’m gonna steal her if you don’t mind.” He said politely to Cleo as he was already pulling you up out of your seat.
“As much as I would love to go just to see Mariana-” You start.
“We’ll go see Mariana while we’re here, but some other time. They can all go out and get drunk, I have other plans for us tonight, if that’s okay of course.” He easily cuts you off.
You let out a sigh of relief, immediately nodding.
“Good, now I’m gonna go figure out how to let Steph down easily.” He laughs, pressing a kiss to your forehead before stepping around you and making his way over to your friend.
“Come on Lewis, it’s been forever since we all went out.” You hear Steph argue with whatever he says to her.
“First off, do you remember the last time we all went out here? Didn’t go too well. Second-” Before he can continue his rebuttal he’s being cut off by Charlotte who is shockingly on his side.
“It’s their anniversary week, tonight is very important Steph. Remember?” You can tell Charlotte is alluding to something that you are clearly out of the loop on.
You watch as Stephs eyes go wide before nodding quickly while Lewis mutters to Charlotte “Real subtle Char’.”
You look at Cleo who just shrugs her shoulders, obviously not aware of what's going on either.
Everyone eventually calms down and starts getting ready, heading inside to pregame as you and Lewis say goodnight. He is promptly pulling you back down to your private bungalow for whatever he has in store for you tonight. When you get inside, he is pulling the shades closed on the windows that overlook the beach. You give him a look, knowing it’s not for your own privacy.
“Okay, I want you to take a nice long shower or bath or get in the pool or something for a little while. I’m gonna go take care of some things and then I’ll come join you and we can get ready.” He explains vaguely.
“What exactly are you taking care of?” You question him, still rather confused.
“Don’t worry about it, you’ll see soon enough. Just trust me, alright?” He shakes his head.
“Okay weirdo. Why’d you close the blinds?” You continue to question.
He lets out a small huff as he shakes his head with a smile, “You never stop with the questions, do you? Just trust me. Off you go.” He says as he turns you around, patting your butt, making you giggle.
You decide to spend some time in the pool, hearing him leave the small bungalow as you change into a different suit. When you slip into the pool you can feel the water cooling your toasted skin. You let yourself look out at the beautiful view, taking in the sounds and the scents that envelope you as you bask in your real life fairytale. You never thought that you would have this kind of life, being in beautiful places with an even more beautiful man who loves you so unashamedly, so wholeheartedly. You let yourself day dream about your future with him, how many kids you might have one day, where the two of you will inevitably settle down, what your wedding day will be like. You stay in the pool for what feels like a solid hour, still no sign of Lewis. You end up getting out, heading to take a shower when you hear other people's voices outside. Everything inside of you wants to run over to the window and peek at what might be going on outside but you restrain yourself, not wanting to ruin whatever it is that Lewis has planned for you. You end up staying in the shower much longer than usual, just enjoying the feeling of the water cascading through your hair and down your spine. A pair of broad arms wrapping around your waist surprises you, you hadn’t even heard him come in. He giggles at your shock, pressing a sloppy kiss to your cheek. Wordlessly you step out from under the water, letting him shower, letting yourself admire him as you so frequently do before stepping out and wrapping yourself in a towel.
“Hey, I wanted some company.” He complains from under the shower head.
“If I stay in any longer I may turn into an actual prune.” You say, making him laugh
He’s much quicker with his shower than you had been. Coming into the bedroom as you stare at your suitcase.
“You know, it tends to be easier if you actually put the clothes on rather than just try to will them onto your body.” He teases you, pinching your hip.
“Well if I knew what I was getting dressed for it would be a hell of a lot easier.” You say to him, suddenly feeling stressed.
“Hey,” He says, sensing your unease, “wear whatever you're comfortable in, it’s just you and me.”
“But this seems special, I don’t want to mess it up.” You say, rummaging through your suitcase.
“It’s special because it’s us, doesn’t matter what you wear. There’s very little you could do to screw this up, I promise.” He says. 
You feel a small weight lift from your shoulders when you look up to see him slipping a t-shirt over his head. Part of you wonders if he did it just to make you feel better. You give him a soft smile, finally deciding on a sundress that is the perfect combination of cute and casual.
“Ready?” He asks, his hand outstretched, waiting for yours.
“Always.��� You smile, taking his hand.
As he leads you out of the bungalow you feel your breath catch in your throat. If you thought the beach was beautiful before, you’re not sure quite what word you would describe it as now. He has had the beach lined with lights and candles, torches lining their way up to a beautifully set yet simple table. You can see that there’s a meal already waiting for the two of you on the table.
“Still trust me?” He asks quietly.
You just nod, looking around at the beautiful scenery, amazed that he made all of this happen. When you finally reach the table in the sand he is pulling your chair out for you.
“Madame.” He says playfully, gesturing for you to take a seat.
You giggle as he places a kiss to your cheek, moving around to his side of the table. He grabs the corkscrew off the table, taking the bottle of wine that was already waiting for the two of you.
“I wanted tonight to be special, and I wanted to be able to surprise you somehow. Sorry I locked you away for a bit.” He chuckles toward the end.
“Ah, how dare you lock me away in literal paradise.” You tease him, making him smile.
“You like it?” He asks and you can tell he’s nervous, not meeting your eyes as he pours you both a glass of wine.
“I love it Lew, it’s beautiful, thank you.” You tell him, reaching across the table to take his hand in yours, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“I wasn’t sure how to exactly pull off making you dinner without you noticing so I kind of cheated and hired someone, well I actually hired Mariana, she’s quite the cook. She was upset she couldn’t come in and see you, I promised we’d come see her later this week. I did the lights though.” You can tell he’s still nervous, rambling things quickly.
“Well I have to say the lights are incredible, and I’d love to go see them.” You say with a light tone but absolutely meaning it, you feel like you're in some sort of wonderland.
He finally pulls the cover off of your meals, making your mouth immediately water, it looks incredible. Lewis has taken you on endless incredible dates, but this one has to take the cake, the effort alone making you swoon. 
Once he is convinced that you are just as happy as you say you are, you can see him visibly relax. His whole demeanor shifting back to the light hearted, loving man that you know so well. Dinner carries on as usual, your conversations seamlessly going from joking banter to important life topics, the flow that you’ve always found yourself so comfortable in with him, even before you started dating. Once you’ve finished eating he’s bringing his seat closer to yours so he can wrap his arm around the back of your chair, pulling you into his warm side.
“You know last night when I asked where you wanted to be in five years?” He asks you quietly.
You hum, leaning your head against his shoulder.
“Well, I left something out of my answer.” He says, confusing you. “I know I said I wanted you by my side, obviously, but I didn’t really elaborate enough.” He’s only confused you further.
Before you can question him, he’s standing from his seat and moving his chair back. You swear your heart stops when you look at him. He’s down on one knee in front of you, reaching into his pocket.
“Lew.” You croak out, not sure what else to say.
“I know, I know that to every other person on the earth, this probably seems insane. It probably seems so fucking quick, and hell it is, but Y/N, I know what I want, and what I want is you, forever. I have loved you far longer than I’ve ever let you know and I think the same goes for you. Since the day I met you I knew that you were going to be monumental in my life somehow, I just didn’t realize exactly how or quite how much. I love you more than I have ever loved anything before, I love you in a way I didn’t know was possible, in a way I didn’t even know I was capable of.” He pauses for a moment, finally opening the small box in his hand to reveal the most beautiful ring you have ever seen in your life, “I’m not asking you to marry me tomorrow, we can still take our time, we have so much ahead of us. All I’m asking is that tonight you make me a promise, that one day you will be my wife. You’re my forever Y/N Y/L/N, let me be yours.”
There are tears streaming steadily down your face, not sure how to process everything he’s saying. You want to nod your head, you want to say yes, but you’re frozen, until those words finally slip through his lips.
“Y/N, baby, will you marry me?” His own voice catches in his throat as he asks the question, obviously nervous and overwhelmed.
“Yes,” you finally choke out, “oh my god of course, yes, fuck of course.”
Your cries are now turning into almost laughter, overjoyed and overrun with emotion.
“Yeah?” He asks, sounding as if he doesn’t truly believe what he’s hearing.
“Oh my god, yes.” You cry through your smile as he stays frozen on his knee, his face breaking into a smile. “Kiss me you idiot.” You laugh.
Within seconds his lips are on yours, pulling you up out of your chair to hold you as close as humanly possible. You can taste the salt of your combined tears as you both laugh into the kiss, giddy with excitement.
“I know it’s so quick but I feel like we’ve been together so much longer than we really have. We can wait as long as you want, there’s absolutely no rush. I just need to know that one day you’ll be my wife, and I want the world to know that too.” He rambles when he finally pulls away.
“I know, I know, of course,” you laugh, kissing him again, “now give me my ring!”
He laughs at you, fumbling with the box slightly through shaky hands before finally sliding the ring onto your finger. It fits perfectly and you can’t help but wonder if Charlotte helped him. The diamonds twinkle in the fairy lights surrounding your table as you admire the look of your engagement ring sitting on your finger.
“So do I have to wait to become Mrs. Hamilton?” You ask.
“Y/N, I would marry you tomorrow if you let me.” He says, kissing you again, your teeth clashing through your smiles.
“What were you going to do if I said no?” You ask him with a teasing tone.
“Honestly? I have no idea, but I was pretty confident you’d say yes.” He says, smirking.
“Is this why you needed to bring me back here?” You ask him, staring at your new ring.
“Yeah, it only felt right. Full circle.” He whispers, “This is also why I’ve been so awol recently. I was making last minute changes to the ring because it needed to be perfect and I was trying to plan this. I’ve been so excited and I know myself well enough to know that I would have let it slip if I was talking to you too much. I’ve never been able to lie to you.”
You can’t help but laugh at the fact that not only is that true, but the reason you had been so annoyed with him the last few weeks was actually a side effect of him planning the most beautiful, loving thing you could think of.
“Everybody knows, don’t they?” You giggle, knowing he wouldn’t have been able to keep it from at least Charlotte and Miles.
“Yeah, they’ve known for a while, longer than I’ve even had the ring.” He blushes.
“Lewis, I love you so much. Thank you, I can’t wait to marry you, I’m so glad you’re the man that will be by my side for the rest of my life.” You tell him sincerely, feeling yourself get emotional again at the thought.
“I love you too my darling, I wouldn’t dream of going through life with anyone else.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Final Note: I had to stop myself from continuing on with this and adding a time jump and their wedding day, it was so tempting. Let me know, does anyone want a one shot of their wedding day at some point? Some cute pre-wedding jitters, vows, wedding night, etc?
I hope you all enjoyed!
544 notes · View notes
0oolookitsme · 7 months
Text
Been Thinking
Type- One-Shoty Blurb
Verse- Dwd!Harry x Dwd!Y/n
Word Count- 1.6k
Warnings- Smut (soft dominance, a few curse words)
A/n- And, here's the first fic of kinktober!
Kinks- Phone Sex, Guided Masturbation
KINKTOBER MASTERLIST | MASTERLIST
Please rb to share!
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Harry was just saving his last document of the day when a meeting was pulled. A meeting that could very well have been done over a few emails, but alas, they couldn't do something that would save their employees even a little of their time.
Thinking that he would only be a bit late, he went into the room not having any idea about his own self that'd be coming out of the same room with 8 files stacked up in his hand. All the ones that needed to be done tonight.
He sat on his chair with all the files sprawled across his desk, and looked at his empty coffee cup in dread. He did not have it in him to go and fetch himself some. So, as unwilling as he was, he defeatedly called the general assistant. Her job was to do just that – it was just Harry who couldn't benefit from it much often considering her infatuation with him.
"A coffee please," he said just when she peeked through the door, slipping his cup that Y/n had left there for him across the desk to have her stay as away from him as possible.
She didn't seem much chirpy today though, considering she just took the cup and left silently – without making any shot at him. It made Harry feel a little relieved, the thought of her finally backing off.
Without much thought, he powered on his laptop and at the same time, dialled up Y/n. He was just calling to let her know that he wouldn't be coming home for the night. And she was normal about it, cursing his office a bit and making him laugh.
It was when he was about to wish her a good night that she muttered something in a small, frail voice. Harry felt alarmed that something was wrong but he figured the problem when she repeated herself on his demand.
"Was thinking about you all day," she said, and after a long pause wished him a good night, hanging up a little later than normal – as if she was waiting for some kind of response. A response that Harry stupidly enough couldn't give. He was just so shocked at her words – she had never been this loud with her needs before. Yes, it's only been six months in their arranged wedding but… still.
Feeling like a prick, he decided to give it a rest. Putting his phone on the desk and just wishing for the coffee to be down his throat already.
Opening up files on his laptop, his head couldn't help but replay the little voice she had very kindly – and indirectly – voiced her needs to him. She said that she had been thinking about him all day, which must mean that she was also eager for him to come home tonight.
God, he can't believe what he's just done. Turned down the needs of the woman who's been making him weak in his knees ever since she's been with him, just because he was too stunned to speak? Rubbing his palm over his hair and fixing his hair a bit, he decided to call her back.
Not the regular call. But, a video call.
He wasn't ready for her to pick up on the first ring. But when he saw her face, he knew that she hadn't intended to pick up. Her hair was a little tousled, lips bitten and plump, eyes a little hazy and, because he squinted, he saw a fine layer of sweat on her forehead.
She surely wasn't sleeping or crying, but Harry shouldn't be thinking about what she really was doing – even though it was as clear as his eye sight.
He immediately opened his mouth and I speak before she could panik. "Don't hang up!" He said quickly. "Please," he trailed off when she paused. For a moment, all he could see was their bedroom ceiling but then she picked up the phone again – her hair now a little matted and sweat wiped off her face.
"I- uh, I'm sorry. I was just-" she stuttered, trying to come up with an explanation, with a lie. However, a shushing sound came through the phone, catching her off guard.
"It's okay, Y/n," he said and she felt a flutter in her stomach at the sound of her name from his mouth. "It should be me apologizing. And I-I'm very sorry," he said, looking at himself with slight disgust in his own brain at his words.
Looking away from him and probably picking at the bedsheet, "it's okay," she said, just as shyly.
"So, tell me. What were you thinking, Y/n?" He spoke, and she couldn't help but clench her thighs tighter.
"Nothing… just about when you'll be home and what would you like for dinner and stuff," she mumbled and while that was a very innocent answer, Harry couldn't help but see past the bullshit.
Humming, he pretended he was thinking hard about something. "Well, I'm not coming home tonight now, am I, darling?" He teased her, feeling more and more dominant in the situation as the time passed by.
Y/n only nodded in response, her eyes never once staying still.
"You can pretend all you want, love. But I can see the fucking mess you've made of yourself," he said impatiently, his voice now hoarse in an attempt to be a little quiet. And also, because under all the nervousness, Y/n's hand had lowered and he could see her red finger prints on her breasts, from when he imagined she was gripping them.
He could see the tips of her ears turn pink, yet she didn't make any effort to cover herself.
"Make that mouth of yours useful, and tell me – were you really thinking about that? Hm?"
"No," she breathed, rolling her lips in and shifting on the bed. "Just wanted you," she continued.
"Where baby?"
"Anywhere. Just wanted you so bad," she whispered lightly, a slight tingle in her nose.
Harry licked his lips, feeling worse about having to stay the night. "Look at you, poor thing. I'm very sorry baby, can't do much from here." He sighed. Leaning back, he put in his airpods. "Help me out a little, will you?" He more of suggested and only smiled when she agreed.
Getting impatien, he cut right to the subject. "Touch yourself for me. I'm here, and I'm listening," he told her, also surprising her.
She hesitated but lied back down when he cooed at her, muttering sweet names as her hand crawled lower and lower. "I can't see you, sweet girl. Put your phone on my bedside table," Harry instructed her, and she did it quickly, desperate for anything type of touch now.
The wetness had started slipping out of her. Her thighs felt wet whenever they rubbed and she was sure some of it was on the bedsheet as well. She knew, that if she touched herself now, she wouldn't be able to last for long. Her nipples were perky and sensitive – a whimper left her mouth with every accidental graze in them.
"Go on, Y/n. Won't give it to your husband?" He said, and Y/n swears she could've came right then and there. Instead, a moan slipped past her lips, and she heard him curse under his breath.
He saw as her hand cover her core, could see her inner thigh that was away from him glistening, and god, does he hate his boss. When her knuckles started moving, Harry could tell that she was in ecstasy. Small sounds started escaping her mouth and the moment she looked at him and sucked her fingers – Harry knew that he hadn't married a woman as innocent as he had thought.
Breathing out with each stroke on her clit, her back arched off the bed. "What are you thinking, Y/n?" She heard him ask, and without much thought she told him.
"About you, Harry. Your fingers, your cock, your mouth," she ranted, her pace increasing with each word.
Harry saw how she was slipping out of her shell, voicing her fantasies to him. And just when he was about to tease her, he heard something. Then again, and again.
She said she was going to come. No, she was yelling his name. No, she's chasing her high, and she's yelling his name. "Fucking hell, Y/n." He gritted through his teeth, feeling like he was going to burst just by the sight of her and the yell of his name in her voice.
"Fuck, I already love you moaning my name," he grunted.
Y/n was long lost now, her hips chasing her own hand as she continued moaning his name.
Harry saw her thighs start to quiver and he prayed that they'd be around his head the next time – while he sucked on her again and again. "I can't hear you – louder, baby." He urged her own, feeling pleasure in her pleasure.
"Fuck, Harry!" She screamed right when her thighs cleanched around her hand. Her other hand kneading her boob a little lightly now.
Her cheeks were flushed, sweat coated her hairline and her forehead, her eyes were squeezed shut and her body shook as her hand was still rubbing her core, getting her through her high.
Slowly and slowly, her hand came out of the cage of her thighs, and went right up to her mouth as she once again looked at him while sucking on them. A smile creeped up on her mouth and once she got a hold of her phone again, she couldn't help but let out a laugh at the sight of his sweaty face.
"You really don't know the things you do to me, Y/n," he said hoarsely, letting his head fall back and shutting his eyes tightly..
"Neither did you until now," she shrugged with a grin spreading on her face, and she knew she was in too deep when he chuckled.
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sapphos-ode · 8 months
Text
Little Cat
Part 16
Larissa Weems part 15 | part 17 | ao3
(4.2k)
~
“Take a seat Miss. Sinclair,”
Enid does as she’s told. Gingerly perching herself on the edge of the leather chair, she could feel the coolness of the material through her tights. Maybe if she doesn’t settle down entirely then meeting will be brief and she can leave. Alas it’s just her wishful thinking.
“I’m sure you’re wondering why I’ve called you in,” Larissa’s eyes jump from her laptop to Enid’s before going back to the screen. She has the blog up on her browser.
The lycan goes to answer but her breath catches in her throat. She has to swallow before trying to speak again, “Am I- am I in trouble?” Her brows are furled and her bottom lip wobbles.
Larissa regards her for a moment, “No.”
Enid relaxes just the slightest, but she’s still on high alert. Her gaze flies around the room as she takes in the decor — hoping to ground herself. The high ceilings and the patterned wallpaper only make her head start spin.
“But something has come to my attention which I must address,” the principal pauses. “As I’m sure you’re aware, everyone knows about your blog, and whilst I do love the community it creates within the school. Taking photos and videos of staff without their consent is highly inappropriate, not to mention publishing them to a public account.
“I’m sure it was all in good faith, however I’m going to ask that you remove them once you return to your dorm.” Larissa left no room for argument. Her word was final.
“I’m sorry Principal Weems,” Enid murmurs with glossy eyes. Her heart pounding.
“Apology accepted,” Larissa bows her head. “And going forth, please take into consideration others’ privacy, some people prefer to keep their personal lives off of social media,”
“I will, and I will delete them! But…” Enid searches the principal’s intense gaze, “just to make sure, you are talking about the video of Miss. Karnstein feeding you on your date at the Harvest festival?”
Larissa’s face falls slack as it takes on a red hue that matches the lipstick she wears.
“And then the one with a picture of you and Miss. Karnstein holding hands, and of Miss. Hansen and Ms. Thornhill dancing in the greenhouse, with the poll?”
With a tired sigh Larissa nods slowly, her eyebrows pinched together. She was hoping the elephant in the room wouldn’t be addressed so directly.
“Yes, those are the posts in question, and any others that you may have posted in the past that include any other staff member,” Larissa clarified, ensuring to prevent any miscommunication, “or fellow pupils,”
“I’ll do that right away, I’m so sorry! It’s just you guys are supes cute! I didn’t think it through!”
“It’s quite alright, just remember to give it some thought in the future, thank you, Enid. You can go now,” Larissa says in defeat.
Enid’s all too eager in jumping out of her seat and rushing to the door. She’s halfway out of it when she stops and turns back to face the older woman.
“Oh! By the way Principal Weems, you and Miss. Karnstein are still winning the poll!” She flashes a smile before slipping away.
She didn’t have detention, and that was the best outcome really. It was a shame she had to delete the posts though, they were beginning to get a lot of traction, and would have increased her blog’s reach significantly if she was allowed to keep them up.
Larissa runs her hand over her face and slumps in her chair. The silence in her office felt heavy and oppressive.
~
She’s busy wrapping up the last few emails for the day when her phone buzzes. The screen lighting up. Larissa’s eyes flick over to it — giving it nothing more than a cursory glance. She does a double take when she sees your name at the top of the notification. The email is forgotten in its entirety as she picks up the phone to read your message.
Atikah: Hey, just come over whenever you’re ready. If you haven’t already eaten I’ll throw us a quick dinner together if that’s okay with you x
Atikah: Also hope you don’t mind, I’ve already picked a movie for us :)
She can’t help but smile at her phone, her thumbs already tapping away.
Larissa: I’ll be over shortly. And dinner would be lovely if that’s not of too much inconvenience for you. Larissa x
She was hesitant adding in the little kiss, but added it nonetheless. Your response is instant.
Atikah: Can’t wait! I’ll see you soon Rissa! x
The principal sends back a thumbs up.
~
Larissa had expected you to choose some sort of trashy chick flick, or a sappy romcom. Not this. A psychological horror. She’s reading the synopsis as you busy yourself throwing together a simple pasta dish.
The blonde can hear you humming to yourself as you finish plating up the food. Her heart swells as she looks over her shoulder at you. You’re so lost in your own world and she feels honoured to be allowed to observe you being you. Still humming a tune unfamiliar to her, you pad over to the sofa, leaning down to kiss Larissa’s forehead (the blonde finds herself closing her eyes and leaning into your touch) before setting the bowls and some cutlery down on the coffee table then dragging it closer to the couch.
As you nestle onto the settee, Larissa can’t help her wandering eyes as they move from your face down to your neck. Pleasantly surprised to see her little token from earlier freed from the confines of your foundation.
“Have you seen ‘Ma’ before?” You say as you settle a throw over the both of you.
Larissa takes the bowl you offer her with a thanks, it smells heavenly, “I’ve not, no, have you?”
“Nope, it seems good from the reviews though,” You chirp, “Last chance to object,”
“I’m all good with ‘Ma’,”
Larissa didn’t mind the occasional thriller, but it wasn’t a genre she’d typically go out of her way to watch. You on the other hand absolutely loved them. They gave you a peace of mind, however contradictory that was. You still felt the actors’ feelings through the screen but they felt different as opposed to when you soaked them in from real life. You still had a disposition to less pleasant emotions and they were abundant in the world – you weren’t a mother yet you knew what it felt like to lose a child, you've felt the type of grief that tears you apart and drains any and all colour from the world. You’ve never had an unfaithful partner but from passing strangers you know the nausea and insecurity it creates within someone, the doubt in one's self worth.
The tragedies of the people you meet – or pass on the street – may as well be your own, the downside to being an empath. And sometimes it becomes hard to tell what feelings are your own, and what ones belong to someone else. In your teen years it caused you great stress, and certainly one or two identity crises. But through the screen, you can tell the difference between the characters’ fear and your own – as clear as night and day. In a way it helped teach you the nuances between them. Gave you the tools to put the burdens of others’ to the back burner and prioritise your own. It helped you recover the pieces of you from the mess of others.
You pressed play and sat back on the seat, scooching closer to Larissa – the both of you eating in an amiable silence. The movie drove on and before long two empty bowls were placed on the coffee table and Larissa’s head had found its way lying on your chest. The steady drum of your heart calming her. The movie was making her feel uneasy, perhaps it was the main cast that reminded her of the students at Nevermore, or perhaps it was the skewed mind of Sue Ann. Whatever it was, it made Larissa restless. And she was thankful you couldn’t see her face from her position.
Of course she should have known you’d catch on. You were confused at first when you felt a horrible gnawing in your stomach. But you glanced down at Larissa who had started to fiddle with your hand and then it clicked. You paused the film and let silence befall you. The blonde turned her head and peered up at you with a questioning look.
“You okay Rissa?” You coo, leaning down to kiss her forehead.
“Yes,” she says with confidence but you know it’s a complete lie.
“You’re not,” you brush a few baby hairs that have worked themselves free from her updo, “we can watch something else,”
Larissa wasn’t used to someone seeing straight through her. She took a moment to respond.
“Please,”
You smile and hand her the remote, silently telling her she could choose. Whilst she flicks through the different films you take to running your thumb over her cheek. Her skin is warm and soft. She lets out a yawn which she tries to stifle.
“Someone’s tired,” you sing, studying the curve of her brow and the path of her hairline. Drinking in every detail of her.
“I’m not- ” she cuts herself off with another yawn.
It’s quite late for a school night, and Larissa can feel sleep tempting her. But she doesn’t want her time with you to end — she’s pulled plenty of late nights, burning the midnight oil to crank out email after email. She could manage another one.
She settles on a romcom, ‘When Harry Met Sally’, it starts to play and she shuffles closer to you. Wrapping her arms around your waist tighter. The pair of you get halfway through the movie when Larissa can’t stop yawning, her eyes keep falling shut only for her to jerk her head up. You’ve stopped watching the film, instead watching her in amusement. It’s when she no longer looks at the tv, and is staring off at something in desperate attempts to just keep her damn eyes open that you pause the movie.
“I should retire for the night,” she murmurs.
You hum softly in agreement as you coax the both of you into a sitting position, Larissa still holding your midriff. Wordlessly you help her stand and when she goes to head for your front door you tut and guide her to your bedroom. She obliges with no protest. A blush on her cheeks and a small happy smile on her lips.
It’s an easy task, getting her ready for bed, you hand her a spare toothbrush and change into your pyjamas whilst she’s busy in your ensuite. You lay out clothes for her to change into and when she leaves the bathroom you slip in to get yourself ready.
When you emerge you find Larissa sat on your bed wearing your clothes (the sight warms your heart) with her eyes half closed. You take pity on her, and with a makeup wipe in hand you slowly strip her face. One hand holds her cheek and she nuzzles in as you wipe away the last remnants of her cosmetics.
“Thank you darling,”
A fuzzy feeling vibrates in your chest. You discard the wipe somewhere, an issue for tomorrow, then you clamber onto the bed and settle behind her.
“Just need to let down your hair and then we can sleep,” you coo into her ear, your breath tickling her. It draws out a pleased hum from her.
With deft hands you pull all the pins from her hair, each one you extricate rewards you with more silver curls that dance around your fingers — finally free of their confines — silken as always, and with the most gorgeous shine. Once all the clips were removed you run your hands through her tresses, massaging her scalp and expelling any tension. Your hands fall from her hair to her shoulders. Without thinking it through you begin to knead the muscles, working out the knots.
The moan Larissa lets out has you blushing but you don’t stop. Determined to massage every last ounce of stress she holds. Her back leans into your front, pushing you onto the bed. You laugh at her before moving the both of you under the covers.
The blonde’s arms are around you in an instant. Holding you flush to her body, she buries her face into your hair, taking a deep inhale. You smell like roses and peony blooms, the faded scent of your perfume gives Larissa a headrush, there’s a smokey undertone to it that adds a complexity to the smell. Larissa makes a mental note to ask what perfume you use.
She feels you pull back and lets you. Gazing down at you with a sleep ridden smile.
“You’re very cute when you’re tired,” you wriggle your arms around her neck.
You pull her down and closer to you. Capturing her lips with your own, savouring the feeling. It’s one you can never have enough of. You let your eyes close as her tongue slips into your mouth. Causing you to moan. The blonde pushes you onto your back, never breaking away from your mouth. She leans over you, whining at the feeling of your lips. Her eyes rake over your body and she so badly wants to take you right there. The desire behind your lidded eyes only egging her on… but she’s so tired.
Larissa lowers herself and lays on top of you. Her face buried in the crook of your neck, her warm breath brushes against your heated skin. The blonde allows herself a short moment to just lie there but when she goes to move off of you, your arms tighten around her waist, keeping her in place.
“Don’t move,” sleep begins to ebb into your voice.
“I can’t, I’m far too heavy, I’ll crush you- ”
“Shhh, you won’t…” you force down a yawn, “and besides, maybe I want to be crushed by you,”
Larissa rolls her eyes but relaxes against you. The instant she closes them she’s gone, out like a light, but not before she faintly registers you whispering sweet dreams to her.
You reach over to your nightstand for your phone and set an alarm for the morning. As you place it back down the light from it casts over Larissa’s, its screen facing down. You notice a Polaroid tucked into the case, craning your neck up to get a better look, you see it’s the one you had taken when you had played Mario Kart — you had been wondering where it had gone. Your entire body softens at realisation Larissa had kept it somewhere she could always see it. When you settled under the covers you pepper kisses to Larissa’s head.
~
Larissa watched with apprehension as Marilyn stalked over to her desk. There was an unnerving spring in her step and her smile was poorly masked. Usually it was Larissa who made people alert — she wasn’t accustomed to being on the other end. Instead of taking a seat across from Larissa’s desk, the botanist walked round to the same side and perched on the edge.
“So?”
“So… what?” Larissa keeps her tone light as she tries to brush off the expectant look.
“So…” Marilyn draws out the vowel, “are you calling everyone ‘darling’ these days or..?” She leaves the question open, suspended in the air between them.
It takes Larissa a second to catch on. She didn’t call everyone ‘darling’, occasionally she’d use the endearment for students who came to her seeking advice and needing comfort.
Marilyn thrived off of the expression Larissa made when the penny dropped. Delighted with how the principal’s eyes widened a fraction and her lips fell into a soft ‘o’.
“I suppose your darling hasn’t told you anything?”
Marilyn blushes at this, her mind running to images of Alice, “She hasn’t, no,” the redhead leans back on her palms, looking up at her reflection from the mirrors mounted to the ceiling. What an odd choice she thinks.
“Atikah and I… we- I took your advice,” Larissa fiddled with a pen on her desk, “I’m not sure what we are but, we’re something- ”
Marilyn interjects with a squeal of delight. Before Larissa can react the redhead has her arms thrown around her. Pulling her into a tight hug.
“Oh! I’m so happy for you!”
Larissa laughs gently as she returns the embrace. Marilyn smells like earth and tea, there’s a freshness to the scent, the kind that comes only after heavy rain. Petrichor, if Larissa remembers correctly.
“You should’ve seen how she looked at you yesterday at lunch! She’s a real sweet one,” Marilyn pulls back and reclaims her previous spot.
“She is,” Larissa dotes softly. “You and Miss. Hansen make quite the pair too, you’re two little lovebirds,”
“Lys is just a big softie, a little hard headed but that’s half the reason I like her as much as I do.” Marilyn can’t contain her grin, “I’m glad you cleared things up with her, Larissa, you deserve someone like her,”
The two converse for a short while, yourself and Miss. Hansen being the topics of discussion before Marilyn excuses herself, mentioning she had some plants she wanted to gift to her lycan.
~
Evening came quickly and Larissa had finished everything for the day. After closing her laptop she surveys her office — just soaking in the space and enjoying it. Her eyes land on one of the many bookcases, she skims the titles on the spines until one catches her eye, she had been gifted it one year in the staff’s secret Santa. It was a collection of classic piano compositions. Admittedly she hardly used it if at all but the gesture behind the gift was appreciated. Come to think of it, she hasn’t felt ivory keys beneath her fingers in a while.
Larissa didn’t own a piano to keep in her private quarters, as much as she would have liked to — there just wasn’t space and it didn’t go with her decor. A keyboard would be the solution but she just hated the plastic keys, they felt cheap. She knew the school owned pianos, there was one in each music classroom, and in the soundproof practice rooms — for students and teachers alike to play without fear of disturbing those around them.
Before she knew it Larissa found herself in a spare music classroom, sitting at an upright piano ghosting her fingers along the keys, the material felt sturdy and cool against her skin. With a deep contented sigh Larissa pressed on the ivories and the sound of delicate notes rang out through the room as she began to play ‘Nuvole Bianche’ by Ludovico Einaudi. The introduction was slow, the notes bleeding into the next before a momentary pause until it found its tempo. As she played Larissa let her body sway with the music, her eyes closed as she fed her soul into the keys. Lost to the world.
~
“Thank you,” you take your violin back from Mr. Hewett, a ginger man. Tall and sinewy, with his cropped hair slicked back. He looked like his limbs were too long for his body.
“Not a problem, I’m always happy to help,” He gave you a smile.
“It seems so silly now I know how to sort it myself,” you chuckled sheepishly as you placed the instrument into its case. “I was about to grab a nail file and whittle the peg down,”
“Oh goodness no! That’s blasphemy!” Mr. Hewett holds a hand to his chest, letting out a disbelieved gasp. “Thank the heavens you came to me first,”
A tuning peg had become tight, causing you grief when you had played the strings. You hadn’t the faintest clue how to fix it or the cause — and the idea of having to fork out for a potentially expensive peg replacement wasn’t appealing. Nipping down to the music wing was a smart decision.
“Thank them indeed,” you agree.
You shut the clasps on the case and turn to the man. Clad in a slightly oversized brown suit as always. You thank him again and take your leave.
The corridor was silent until you reached the end when you heard something faintly. As you crept closer to a classroom door that was left just a touch ajar you could make out the sounds of a piano more clearly. The music seemed to breathe, slowing marginally before bursting into more life only to repeat again. Whoever was playing was exceptionally skilled and curiosity got the better of you. Quietly you push the door open and peek your head in — only just silencing your gasp.
There she sat, in the dimly lit room, slender fingers dancing over the keys. The evening sun leeched in through the window, catching on the specks of dust, and shone on her like a spotlight. Diverting all attention on her. As if anyone could look elsewhere — Larissa’s entire existence was all consuming and wholly captivating. How anyone could want to look away was beyond you.
You slip into the room and close the door behind you silently. Setting your violin down on a nearby desk without a sound. You wouldn’t forgive yourself if you disturbed this moment. If you tore Larissa from this state of absolute peace and serenity she had found. The blonde played the last notes — holding the keys down and putting her foot on the sustain pedal. The sound fades softly into nothingness. The air in the room is fragile like glass.
You allow a few seconds before speaking in the gentlest of tones, “you play beautifully, almost as beautiful as yourself,”
Larissa’s eyes shoot open and her head snaps round to the source of the voice. Instantly relaxing when she sees it’s you. A pink hue creeps onto her cheeks as she bows her head and smiles.
“Thank you, but it’s just a pastime of mine,”
“You’re far too humble Rissa,” you muse. Walking the last few steps to close the distance between you.
With a quick glance at the door to make sure no one was watching, you press a sweet kiss to her lips, your hands caressing her face. You can feel her smile against you.
“How long have you played for?”
When seated at the piano bench, Larissa reaches just below your lower lip. You move to stand behind her and capitalise on that fact, resting your chin on her head, wrapping your arms around her neck, letting your hands dangle in front of her chest.
“Just before I moved here to attend Nevermore,” her voice was quiet, just like the final notes she had played.
Her reply creates more questions in your mind. You want to know her life story. And so much more. But you don’t voice any of those.
You remove your chin from its perch, and lean down next to her ear, “Can we play a duet?” Your hushed voice graces her hearing.
“If I know the composition then yes,” Larissa can’t help her Cheshire Cat grin.
You hum in thought as you think of songs, “do you know ‘Time Forgotten’ by Brian Crain?”
“I do, yes,” Larissa tilts her head to the side to steal a kiss from you.
You all too happily lean into it before abruptly pulling away. Practically skipping across the room to where your violin sat in its case. Larissa watches intently as you settle the instrument on your shoulder, resting your chin on the chin rest as you walk back to her. You run the bow over the strings, your brows furrowing in concentration as you listen to the notes, an expression Larissa finds painfully adorable.
Once you’re back at her side you fiddle with the tuning pegs, play the strings again, and then make a few more adjustments until you’re satisfied with the sound.
“Ready?” The blonde asks, her fingers already poised over the keys.
“At your beck and call,” you hum, nestling the violin back between your shoulder and chin. Bow hovering across the strings.
The piano starts off the music and the violin makes its entrance shortly after. Your notes play longer, a beautiful contrast to the shorter ones from the piano. As the song progresses Larissa shuts her eyes and lets her body move in time with the song. You on the other hand watch her, you rock gently on your feet, the pair of you letting the ebb and flow of the music take over — seep into your bones and claim your beings. The song is gentle but not lacking in evoking a melancholy feeling. It’s soothing and effective in banishing any thoughts from your mind other than Larissa Weems and the violin.
The song peters out on a shy diminuendo, feathering off into the ether. You relax and remove your violin, holding it lower as you observe Larissa. Her face is relaxed, void of the usual tenseness. She sighs softly as she opens her eyes to find yours already trained on her. They’re lidded and are rife with mellowness. She can’t put into words how ecstatic she is. The music subdued her but it hasn’t dampened how alive she feels — she had dreamed of playing a duet with you. Weeks ago it was all just a fanciful dream she dared not to entertain fully. And here she sat, that daydream very much a reality.
It seems dreams really do come true.
~
Taglist - @weemssapphic @h-doodles @blessmysouljessisonaroll @eveymay @lvinhs @enchantressb @a-queen-and-her-throne @vmpnano @opheliauniverse @emsgwenstan @renravens @lex13cm @im-a-carniverous-plant
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universitypenguin · 7 months
Note
Hello Alice! Lloyd and princess have been living in my head rent free lately 😍 and it’s got me thinking (please no pressure ever to answer any of my silly little asks!) what do you think princess would do/how would she feel after all this time apart and after everything that’s been going on if she thought Lloyd had sleep with someone else during this time apart?
Thank you for sharing your stories with us! I’m so excited for what’s next to come with these two❤️
Author’s Note: @drabblewithfrannybarnes 🥰
Thank you so much for this lovely ask! I wish I was a faster writer, but alas… that will never be my lot in life. 😭 Instead of doing Kinktober, I’ve been working on improving my short story skills this month, which led to me revising this several times. And by revising I actually mean starting from scratch three times in a row.
I’d challenged myself to keep trying until I had gotten it just right, so it was very satisfying to look at this draft and realize I was finally happy with it. Thank you so much for motivating me to write this, please enjoy! 💙🩵🤍
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If He Wanted To, He Would…
“Hey Princess? Can you fix my phone?”
You were stirring honey into your tea, watching the clump slowly dissolve, when Lloyd made his request. He stood by the door wearing athletic shorts and a blue quarter zip, frowning at his phone.
“I thought you were going on a run.”
Lloyd grunted, tapping the screen. The line between his eyebrows appeared.
If this phone issue prevented him from going on his run you were going to lose your mind. Thanks to the stalker situation, your alone time was extremely limited. Only when Lloyd jogged the trail encircling the cabin were you allowed the luxury of complete solitude. He jogged three times a week and each excursion guaranteed you at least an hour of alone time. Without these breaks you’d go insane.
“Why don’t you take my phone instead?”
“My email isn’t synching. I’m trying to make sure the email I sent to Bishop went through.”
“I’ll fix it. Here, you can use my phone.”
Lloyd scowled at the offending device. “I didn’t even mess with it this time. Why is it doing this?”
You held out your phone. “Just take mine.”
“Do you think it’s the wifi?” Lloyd asked.
“You can borrow my AirPods, too,” you said.
“I never run with headphones in and neither should you.”
“That’s something you will never, ever, have to worry about.”
Lloyd smirked as he exchanged phones with you. “Right, I forgot who I was talking to. Good luck with that thing, I’ll see you in an hour or so.”
When he was gone you collapsed on the couch. Finally, the sanctity of solitude. You basked in the silence for a minute before turning your attention to repairing his phone. There were no issues in the app settings or the phone settings, so you tried restarting it. After clearing the cached data, you removed his account and added it again, without success. Then you updated the app and, much to your relief, the email finally synched.
You’d just finished the installation and locked his phone when it buzzed. A text appeared on his lock screen, visible in the preview window.
Don’t worry about Michael. He isn’t the jealous type.
You stared at the message, baffled, like a puppy encountering its reflection for the first time, perplexed by the inexplicable sight. Who was Michael? Perhaps some context would help. You opened the message app and scrolled back through his previous messages with the sender, April Ward.
Their first message was dated about two weeks ago, right after Lloyd had returned from Idaho.
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Seeing you on Friday… I love you… don’t worry about Michael… he isn’t the jealous type…
April Ward was his ex-girlfriend. What had happened between them in Idaho?
You hadn’t questioned the limited contact you’d had with him at the time, but now it felt like a huge red flag. Your stomach twisted into knots.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Twenty-five minutes had passed. Lloyd would be home soon and you still didn’t know what you were going to say. Your thoughts were chaotic. You felt naive, foolish, and gullible.
You had believed he was grieving and settling his father’s affairs. You had assumed he was too busy to call you or that his phone was out of service range. You were such a sucker. Hurt and anger vied for dominance inside of you, but neither gained enough ground to claim victory. The emotions were deadlocked and trapped in the middle of them, all you felt was numb.
Distantly, you recognized that you were in shock. Of course you were in shock. It was a shocking development. This wasn’t the Lloyd you knew. He’d never let you down before. In spite of his rough edges, he was always honest with you, even when it came to difficult topics; especially when it came to difficult topics.
How had he become this person, someone capable of such an ugly betrayal? When had your best friend turned into your enemy?
You didn’t hear the creak of the door’s hinges, but at Lloyd’s voice, your head snapped up. Your lip curled into a snarl.
Lloyd stopped short. “Princess? What’s wrong?”
“Who’s April Ward?”
His nostrils flared as he inhaled through his nose.
“She’s a veterinarian who treated a sick calf for me a few weeks ago. Why?”
“Liar. April is your ex, I read your texts.”
“Princess, it’s not what you think-”
You hissed. “Stop! Stop lying to me! You cheated, didn’t you?! Just admit it!”
“I’m not lying!”
Without thinking, you flung the phone at him. Lloyd ducked and it hit the wall, then clattered to the floor.
“Calm down!” Lloyd barked.
“No! Tell me what happened!”
“It wasn’t on purpose-”
“You slept with her by accident?! Come on!”
“I didn’t cheat, Princess! Listen to me! I didn’t intend to see April. There was a sick calf, so I called the vet, who turned out to be my highschool girlfriend.”
“And then you slept with her.”
Lloyd snarled. “I didn’t sleep with her.”
“I don’t believe you!”
“I’m telling you the truth!”
Your chin lifted. “She cares about you.”
“We dated in highschool, okay? That’s all. For the record, the last time I slept with her, you weren’t even alive!”
“Are you insulting my age, or yours?”
Lloyd threw his hands up. “Neither. Forget I said that. Here’s what happened on Friday: I called for a vet and April showed up. She treated the calf, we had a drink in the kitchen and talked for a few hours. When we finished talking she went home.”
“What are you leaving out of this story?”
“Nothing!”
“Did you have sex in the kitchen?”
“There was no sexual contact, there was barely even physical contact!”
You zeroed in on his last point. “Ha! So you did something with her, didn’t you?!”
“There was a kitchen table between us for 90% of the evening. She reached across it and touched my hand while we were talking. Later, I hugged her goodbye. That was the extent of our physical contact.”
His delivery was fluid. The words were crisp and his tone of voice was even. That should have comforted you. Instead, it made you even more suspicious.
“Princess, I can only tell you this in so many ways: nothing happened. Believing it is up to you.”
“If nothing happened, then why didn’t you tell me that you’d seen her?”
“I don’t like talking about that period of my life… and… maybe because I didn’t know how to approach the subject.”
You stared at Lloyd, torn between doubt and trust.
He sighed. “I know it looks bad. If our roles were reversed, I’d react the same way, but I swear it was nothing more than old friends catching up.”
“Fine. I believe you.”
He looked relieved for a split second before you continued.
“But keeping this from me was a betrayal in itself.”
“I’m sorry,” Lloyd said.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You were still curled up in the rocking chair on the porch when dusk faded into night. As a concession to the dropping temperature, you’d draped a blanket around your shoulders. The nights were getting colder as autumn approached.
If he wanted to, he would. If he wanted to, he could.
You’d always considered Lloyd to be honest, at least with you, before today. Now you wondered about the veracity of that assumption. As you examined your reasoning, the uncomfortable truth crystallized. Lloyd was capable of cheating on you. He was certainly sneaky enough. Keeping secrets and guarding his emotions were Lloyd’s greatest strengths. He was a master in the art of lying. Half-truths, omissions, fabrications, he could do it all and conventional ethics didn’t mean much to him. He lied as easily as other people breathed - those were the cold, hard facts.
Reality slapped you in the face, unraveling the sense of trust you’d previously had in Lloyd. In an abstract way, you’d always known he was ruthless, but now you appreciated how easily he could rip your heart out if he wanted to. Him wanting to wasn’t even a requirement, all it would take was a moment of carelessness.
You didn’t know what you were feeling more: hurt, anger, or fear. Each emotion claimed a part of your heart, splitting it into three equal pieces. The feelings swirled, a vortex of negative thoughts that sucked you into a whirlpool of despair. Your mood dropped as quickly as the temperatures. Soon, chilly air nipped at your nose and ears. You drew the blanket tighter in an effort to conserve warmth.
The door creaked and you heard Lloyd’s footsteps approaching, but you didn’t acknowledge him.
“It’s getting cold, Princess. You need to come inside.”
You ignored him.
“Princess…”
You burrowed into the blanket, silently declaring your intent to remain where you were.
Lloyd sighed. “I don’t know what to say, other than I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“Too late,” you muttered.
“I can’t change the past, but I can give you access to my phone if you want. Is that a reasonable compromise?”
You turned to him, frowning.
“The problem isn’t access, Lloyd. I have that already. The problem is that I don’t want to keep you on a leash, I just want to trust you. Think about it from my point of view - if I’m going to have a meltdown every time one of your exes shows up, I’m in for a bad time.”
“April is my only ex-girlfriend,” Lloyd said.
“So, we’re back to lying, are we? I’m trying to meet you halfway, but if you keep-”
“She is, damn it! I never wanted a relationship before. You know I’m telling the truth, Princess. You were my closest friend for the past three years. When was my last relationship?”
Abruptly, the weight of evidence tilted in his favor. Your thrumming pulse slowed to a steady beat. Lloyd moved closer.
“Come on, Princess, you’re freezing. Let’s go inside.”
You shook your head. “I want to believe you, but I know how easily you can bend the truth.”
“Actions speak louder than words,” Lloyd countered. “I’ve already synced my messaging app to your personal laptop and shared my location with you. If you let me, I’ll prove that you can trust me.”
He extended his hand and you hesitated, but took it and let him pull you to your feet. You let him lead you inside to the sofa, where he laid a throw blanket over your legs.
“You haven’t said whether you’ll give me a second chance,” he said.
You twisted your hands in your lap.
“I know that I misinterpreted your messages to April. That said, I’m not letting you off the hook for withholding information that would’ve put them in context. The root of the issue is that if you decided to cheat on me, I probably wouldn’t notice. You’re sly enough to get away with almost anything, if you set your mind to it.”
“Alright, but let’s take another factor into consideration,” Lloyd said. “The pool of women who actually want to sleep with me after they realize I’m an asshole is smaller than you think.”
“Oh, please. Give me a break, women drool over your ass every day.”
“Before they talk to me. Now, if we consider the pool of men who want to sleep with you… it’s large to begin with and once they get to know you, they’re even more interested.”
You snorted. “Should I sync my messaging app to your laptop?”
“No need, I already know your passwords. Are we good?”
“We’re not bad. I wouldn’t go as far as calling us ‘good,’ though.”
Lloyd nuzzled your temple. “I was telling the truth about April being my only ex-girlfriend.”
“It’s hard to believe, but… it tracks. I know you’re not used to explaining yourself, but if this arrangement between us is going to work, you need to.”
He relaxed. “I can do that.”
You snuggled into his chest, basking in the warmth you found there. His broad palm stroked up and down your spine and within a few minutes you were nodding off.
“How many ex-boyfriends do you have?” Lloyd asked.
Your eyes flew open. “Um… why?
“I just want to know how worried I should be.”
“You don’t need to be worried.”
“That’s not an answer, Princess.”
You licked your lips. “How far back do you want to go? Kindergarten? Middle-school?”
Lloyd scowled. “Kindergarten? How many boys are we talking about here?”
“I…” you broke off. “Hold up, how did we get on this topic?”
“That’s not important,” Lloyd said. “How many boys have you dated?”
You sat up. “That isn’t what you asked me. You wanted to know how many ex-boyfriends I had, not how many boys I’ve dated. Those are two different topics.”
His lips compressed. “Fine, then. How many boys have you dated?”
“I guess about…ugh…” You covered your face, groaning. “Do we have to do this? Trust me, you’re better off not knowing. My dating history is cringe-worthy.”
“I want a number, Princess.”
You sucked in a breath through your teeth. “I might need some scratch paper…”
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The End.
I hope you enjoyed it! Reblogs, likes, and comments are all appreciated and welcomed!
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hulktf · 9 months
Note
Could you help me hulk out into a huge dumb hulk beast?
You were always a straight-A nerd. That's why it came as a shock when Professor Cain posted grades for the biochemistry midterm and your grade came at a barely passing C-. Surely, university couldn't simply be this hard, could it?
When you emailed him, he asked you to come to his lab after hours - at your earliest convenience - to rectify such issues with extra credit. So right after your debate club meeting that evening, you rushed over to CDA 018, the famed underground lab room.
As soon as you entered, you had no time to process or react as some kind of gas filled your vision, eventually knocking you out. When you woke, you were still in the lab, but with your hands bound behind your back and around a chair, and duct tape over your mouth.
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Did someone break into the professor's lab? Were you a hostage?
"MMM - MMM!" You tried to make some kind of noise to get someone's attention. Thankfully, you heard some rustling from down one of the endless, tall aisles of beakers and equipment. However you were perplexed to see the 32 year old Professor Cain emerge, unbothered and nonchalant towards your current state.
"I knew you'd come," Professor Cain said to you. Looking at the fear and confusion you were able to project through your eyes, he laughed. "You're telling me that a prodigy like you can't figure out what's happening? Didn't you come for extra credit?"
You slowly nodded.
"I've been watching you in class. The shy, yet confident overachiever that wants to be sure he's on top. The thing is..." the professor started, turning his attention to some concoction on the table. "...You're also such a loser. Don't get me wrong, I love academia. But you... Well, let's just say I would like a more balanced class. We already have some great, high-achieving students - without your know-it-all attitude."
You could barely think, but tried to wiggle out of the chair and your restraints. Alas, you were too weak to break out of anything, and completely unequipped to escape.
"If you'd like to gain some extra credit - enough to lift your final grade up two letter grades - you'll be assisting me right now. Here," the professor continued. He turned back to you. "You'll be assisting me - as my first subject of a personal project 10 years in the making. A formula, finalized by one of your fellow students."
Your eyes widened and you shook your head violently. How is this even possible? How could he do this to you?
Professor Cain hoisted you up by the arm, freeing you from the chair, before leading you to the lab's only human-sized experimental chamber. You tried to make noise, any noise, to protest it, but you couldn't free yourself from the scientist's surprisingly strong grip. Due to your slow reaction time, you couldn't get up in time before the scientist slammed the door behind you.
You scrambled upwards nonetheless, looking around and studying the chamber's cramped inside. In a desperate attempt, you tried to tackle the chamber's door open, but the impact only sent you stumbling back, not the door. You tried to scream again, but with the duct tape sealing your mouth, the only person to hear was the uncaring Cain, who smiled as he watched you struggle to escape.
"Don't resist this, I think you might enjoy it," he said as he punched in commands into the chamber's computer.
Overhead, a mechanical voice sounded through the small, tinny speakers of the chamber. "Initiating masculine enhancement process. Infusing gamma formula now."
No way, you thought. No way you could enjoy this, right? Who needs masculine enhancement? You were fine being who you were. The image of the dumb, muscle-obsessed jocks you despised around campus came to mind, and you couldn't understand why he would want to turn you into that. You didn't want to change.
However you were helpless as a greenish smoky gas filled the chamber. You tried to resist breathing, but you couldn't help it. It irritated the back of your throat and you suppressed the urge to cough. The gas made you lightheaded... But also... euphoric?
A buzz started playing - you couldn't tell if it was from the equipment or the speakers. A strange warmth washed over you. The anxiety creeping up your throat slowly dissipated with each breath as words emerged from the buzzing. It was faint at first, but with each repetition his senses became more intense as it got harder to think.
** MUSCLE UP. DUMB DOWN. HULK OUT. BE A MAN. **
Something was unraveling deep in your psyche and soul. As the image of the campus jocks lingered in your mind, the hypnotic words reached into your brain to root itself in the deepest recesses of your self. That's when you felt a sudden headrush, as if someone suddenly overloaded your brain with adrenaline and dopamine. Your eyes widened as you gasped (as much as you could) through your nose.
You didn't know it yet, but your irises had taken on a bright green hue, inhuman yet peak human. The toxic formula had seeped into your bloodstream, leaking a toxic attitude into your brain. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you groaned (or moaned?) through your covered lips. Your body relaxed then tensed as changes began to permeate your whole being.
"It's starting!" The professor exclaimed through the glass. "No longer will you be your scrawny, puny, know-it-all self. Think about how strong, how powerful you'll be..."
Strength and power was all you were feeling. It was electrifying, enlightening. You could feel a surge throughout all your nerves and muscles. Almost out of reflex, on a whim, you tried once more to break out of your thick wrist restraints and - boom! - your fists broke free from them as if they were only tissue paper, finally freeing your arms. You ripped off the tape off your mouth, but instead of screaming for help you stayed put, a grin coming on your face.
With your arms able to rest at your side, you stood up taller and straighter than you ever did before, as if years hunched over your computer were replaced with years of perfect form in the gym. You probably now had the strength to punch your way out of the chamber if you really wanted to. You were feeling good, and you couldn't remember why you wanted to leave.
That was only the beginning. A soreness and burning spread throughout all your muscles, as if you just had days of intense workouts. Your closed your eyes as you felt another headrush. You gripped your head as you felt every muscle in your body grow, your skin tightening around them. In your position the sleeves of your white shirt felt tighter than ever, and with a twitch of your muscles, a subconscious flex, a loud rip sounded inside the chamber as your arms burst through your sleeves.
You slowly pulled your hands away from your face to see the destruction to your best debate shirt. But debate is for pussies, you thought to yourself. You didn't think you'd ever admit it to yourself, but the thought made you grin, almost chuckle. Feeling your chest strain against your shirt and your thickening neck constricted by your tie, you grabbed the edges of the dress shirt and tore it apart from the middle, revealing that your scrawny body now had hard muscles taking on a toxic green hue. A huge and wide chest, six-pack abs, and lats and traps for days. This felt right.
It wasn't long before you realized you were growing in height too. Looking down at your tight pants, you realized they were now several inches off the floor on top of barely holding onto your calves and thighs. Then you looked up, and realized that throughout this transformation you slowly been hunching over, the 7-foot-tall chamber eventually becoming too short for your stature. As you adjusted your stance to flex your upper body muscles, another loud rip was heard as your belt and chinos could no longer contain you. You looked down to see your feet destroy your shoes, no longer the right fit.
Whatever was left of them was poorly hiding your growing bulge. You grabbed your dick through them like a dumb horny frat bro, something so obscene you never would've dared doing, but the action ended up shedding the last of your remaining clothes. Your hardening cock had grown to a 10 inch emerald snake, growing too large to be contained by these small flimsy pieces of fabric.
Already overloaded by pleasure and power, the testosterone making machine in your balls was permanently changing your body and mind. Hair started coming in around them, your pits, and on your legs. Your typical clean-shaven baby face was feeling prickling pain as a beard started coming in. It came in dark green, just like the hair atop your head had become. You felt so fucking strong, but you also needed relief.
After once again flexing and admiring your own musculature, the idea of sex entered your mind. You were the sexiest beast in miles, a real Hulk blessed with a gift of gods.
You briefly ran your hands over your abs, feeling your pleasure trail and leading yourself to pumping your cock. Each stroke only emitted even more mind-numbing pleasure as the image of hot guys and girls servicing and worshipping your cock and body filled your mind. You slowly slid to the floor, laying nude with your head peering over your pecs to watch yourself jack off. Fuck yeah.
It wasn't long until you shot out a shitton of cum, hitting the top of the chamber and the wall. You nearly roared as you came, never feeling such an intense orgasm in your life. The last pieces of your old, sad, puny self were ejected, supplanted by this new Hulk self, knowledge of years on the football field and the gym with bros replacing old memories of nerdy pursuits and late nights studying.
You could feel your heart beat through your chest. Fuck, that really just happened. The haze that settled on your head still lingered, but at this point you didn't even mind. Fuck school, you thought. You chuckled dumbly at the thought, mindlessly thinking of everything you'd rather be doing than school while cum was still dripping down your cock and abs.
You only remembered where you were when the professor outside knocked on the door.
"Thanks for participating in my experiment," he said with glee. "Clean yourself up. There are napkins on the side cabinets. There's also some shorts, XXL to fit you."
You did as you were told, simply. Your body felt strange, but powerful, and you loved it. The chamber unsealed and out you emerged.
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A smirk crept across your face. As you looked down at your rippling muscles bulging under green skin, you realized that your deepest desires were satisfied. No need for the monotony and stress of academia when you could be a Hulk - a god.
Now you spend your time trying to get even bigger in the gym, endlessly bodybuilding and being a real bro when you're not too busy laying pipe on whoever comes your way.
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ghoulnextdoor · 3 months
Photo
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Full Circle Lady Vampire – Unquiet Things
In September of 2017, I posted a fancy lady vampire painting to my various social medias. opining that surely my friends had it in their hearts to pool their resources and purchase it for me to hang in my boudoir for all eternity, to the tune of a cool 14K. As it happened, no one loved me enough for that! Regardless, I never forgot her lovely, spoiled little face, and I continued the tradition of posting the painting every now and again over the ensuing years. I loved her so much that I wanted to include her in The Art of Darkness, but alas, Richard Bober, the artist, never answered even one of my approximate 90 billion emails. it was not to be.
Sometime in the year 2021, Handsome Devils Puppets and I started plotting and scheming on the idea of coaxing her off the canvas and transferring her soul into the floopy-limbed, fabulously attired vessel of a custom marionette, as a sister puppet for Sei Shōnagon and Maria Germaova.
The project began in earnest in June of 2023, a month after I had written a blog post that blew up everywhere and got a lot of attention, inquiring about the mysteriously unknown artist of an iconic book cover for a certain edition of a much-beloved book. I was privy to a lot of speculation and chatted quite frequently with the podcaster who was eventually to report on it; I’d pass along more guesses and suggestions that I was receiving from blog commenters and emails, and she’d share industry tidbits and whispers that she was amassing in her detective work. A name eventually emerged that one or two people seemed quite certain about, and though it was a bit of a wild ride getting there–it was eventually revealed that those eagle-eyed individuals were correct. Y’ALL. Richard freaking Bober –the artist responsible for my favorite gorgeous goldilocked vampire mean girl– was the artist who created THAT cover art for Madeleine L’Engle’s A Wrinkle In Time!!
That cover was something I wanted to include in The Art of Fantasy, but I thought, “Why bother? no one knows who the artist is; who would I even ask for permission?” But isn’t it funny that both these pieces of art caught my eye for various reasons, and without even realizing they were the same artist, I was hoping to have them in the pages of separate books?
I later learned through interviews with Richard Bober’s family and nephews that he was a bit of a recluse, and I don’t think he emailed much, so chances are, I was never going to receive a response to my inquiries anyway! And sadly, he died in late 2022, so he never lived to get proper credit for that book cover. From everything I’ve heard, though, I’m not sure he would have even cared!
So in a very roundabout way, this feels like it has come round full circle. Or looped around several times and tangled confusingly because I do tell a rambling story.
Anyway, isn’t she beautiful? She’s totally gonna steal my soul tonight. Worth it.
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cowboylor · 1 year
Text
meet cute
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you need an emergency boyfriend and ross happens to fit the role.
warnings: language, creepy men? in uncomfortable situations?, implied alcohol consumption, fake dating blurb yay
wc: 1.5k
note: this was just for giggles but i'm gonna post it. cheers! :)
Your life mantra is not to wish ill will on anyone but—
“Bet you we could set up your crypto account tonight. Hell, even chicks like you need to get in on this.”
Fuck this guy. Absolutely fuck him.
You're trying to be positive; trying to look for any part of him that you think you can stomach. But you hate his hairstyle and the way the gel clings to it like a different entity. And you don't like his voice when he talks over you. Or the trickles of spit that spew out of his mouth when cutting you off.
Worst of all, the more time you spend listening and narrowing your eyes the more trapped you feel.
It wasn't exactly your friend's fault for finding someone exciting and she had to make a swift exit with them through the back door. In any other setting, you'd commend, even applaud her for getting laid but now—
Todd is here. Or Tim.
You're barely tipsy but can't recall his name for the life of you. But he doesn't seem to mind; talking your ear off about his bitcoin investments and how his independent company is finally taking off after years in practice.
You bring your glass to your lips, muttering sardonically, “Even chicks like me?”
He grins. “Certainly.”
Fighting off a snort, you set your drink on the bar top. You busy yourself with anything to avoid more small talk; checking the time on your phone, scrolling through old emails, and even jotting down a few miscellaneous items for your grocery list.
When have Friday nights become this cruel to you?
“Then, how ‘bout it?”
You perk up. “Sorry?”
He stands by your side with a toothy grin and an eyebrow raised that makes your stomach churn.
You avoid his eye again out of habit, laughing uncomfortably as he steps closer to you to press his shoulder to yours.
“Us taking this somewhere else.”
You blink.
The word 'no' threatens to spill out of your lips, along with 'eat shit' and 'not in this economy' but alas—you're silent and shifting your eyes uncomfortably again because you are not too sure any of those options would deter him anyway.
He barks a laugh and your face warms.
“I need to make a call.” You end up saying before quickly retreating to the other side of the bar.
He lets you go with a raised glass and smirk.
You wander over to the corner. You try calling your friend once before the voicemail comes and you're cursing lowly. Glancing up at the exit sign, you weigh your options quickly before looking back across the room.
You watch as Todd, or Tim, picks up his draped coat from the bar top and tops off his drink with one last swig.
Shit.
Your eyes skirt over rows of people. Past the obvious bachelorette party that you could realistically get lost in and get a shot of tequila out of it. Past the pretty bartender with a sleeve of tattoos, and past the middle-aged man who sports a green cardigan over his button-up.
The door of the bar opens and you're walking over before you can think twice.
“Babe!” You jeer loudly and then immediately close your mouth.
'Babe' is tall and looks kind, which is already enough to rival Tim (you're ninety percent sure it's Tim). He checks behind himself, craning his neck to see if anyone is behind him because you definitely couldn't be talking to him. He lets out a sound of surprise when you clash into him, wrapping your arms around his middle as you awkwardly embrace.
“Can I ask a favor?” You say in a hushed voice, peering up at him through your hug.
“Uh,” He opens and reopens his mouth before landing on a simple, “Sure?”
“Need you to be my fake boyfriend,” You say, resisting the urge to roll your shoulders in disgust at the way it sounds. You glance over to Tim. “Please?”
He follows your line of sight, before immediately wrapping an arm around you.
“Been looking for you!” You gush loudly.
“I'm here now,” He assures, letting you grip his shoulders like you're taken with him.
And partly, you are. With your face buried into the front of his coat, you can't help but notice how good he smells. Woodsy is the word you land on before he's tapping his index finger against your lower back until you whip around to face Tim's furrowed brow.
“Oh,” You breathe out.
You shift, detangling limbs from your fake boyfriend's body to lean into his side instead. Awkwardly, he rests his arm around your waist.
“This is my friend,” You say to him before your eyes flit back to Tim.
He nods before extending his hand. “Ross.”
Good to know. Really good to know.
You watch as Tim undecidedly takes his hand before roughly shaking it. Fighting the urge to roll your eyes, you open your mouth to explain an early exit.
Tim interrupts, “Are you two–”
“Yes!” You both say.
Tim’s gaze hardens. “Oh.”
He looks indecisive; as if debating whether or not he wants to say something more that could possibly get him into trouble. He would if Ross wasn't here—or if Ross happened to be a foot shorter. Yet, Tim just purses his lips and nods.
“We would love to stay...” You trail off before glancing up at Ross.
He catches your look. “But we have plans.”
You nod enthusiastically.
Romantic ones, you want to quip to really drive it home. You settle for a hand on his chest to get your point across.
“Right,” Tim says, eyeing you directly. It looks like he finally gained enough courage because he takes another step closer to you. “So no–”
“Have a good one, mate.” Ross interrupts, stepping in front of you.
You're only able to exhale when he retreats to the other end of the bar. Then, you're reactively stepping away from Ross and his gaze is falling to the hand that held you by the waist.
“Thank you,” You say like you're out of breath. He looks up at you with a smile that would put any other person at ease, but for you, it has you screwing your eyes shut in embarrassment. “And I'm so sorry."
He laughs. “For what?”
“I'm sure you didn't expect to be terrorized when you were just coming here for a drink,” You explain in rush, your words running together in an effort to get them out all at once. “I got ditched and trapped and none of that was going great—”
You know you sound like a case, but Ross listens to you go on until you’re sighing and looking at him apologetically again.
“I am sorry.”
“Don’t apologize,” He frowns when you say it again. He hesitates before adding, “I’m just glad I didn't get throttled by anyone.”
You blankly stare, eyes running up his stature. “You would’ve been fine.”
His eyes light up.
“Saying I could’ve taken him?” He teases.
You laugh quietly. “You’d have a fighting chance.”
There's a brief pause of silence between the two of you that has you thinking this is where it ends. Before Ross ends up bidding you a quick goodbye and making his way to his group of friends or painfully informing you that his non-fake girlfriend is waiting for him at the other end of the bar top. You're prepared to apologize again, the "s" word is on the tip of your tongue—
“What’s my girlfriend's name?”
Your mind stutters momentarily, and you look at him in surprise. He's peering down at you and you realize your assumption that he looked kind was completely accurate. His eyes fucking radiate it.
You give him your name and hand sheepishly.
“Can I walk you to your car?” He asks after, still holding your hand. Then he nods to the bar, “Or buy you a drink?”
You chuckle shyly. “Shouldn’t I buy you a drink for what I put you through?”
“If you’d like,” He shrugs. “If that gets you to stay.”
You spare a look away from Ross to survey the bar. You can't see him anywhere but your eyes still skirt over every bar seat just to make sure.
“I'll hold your hand the whole time,” He adds lightheartedly, following your eyes as you glance around the room. Then he quips a quiet, "Don't think he'd try anything anyway."
“Boyfriend of the year,” You muse at him with a smile.
You swear tints red at this but you don't linger on it too long, letting his hand brush yours as guides you back to the bar. He ducks his head down, murmuring something along the lines: “Would be a pretty shitty one if I didn't.”
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actualbird · 1 year
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hc time: nxx team members ranked on how good they are at answering their phone
1st place: miss mc rosa qiangwei
purely based on canon, she seems to be immensely punctual when it comes to answering both calls and texts! i know this is mostly because of Story Reasons (because, mc, narratively, Needs to be good at answering her phone punctually for the story to progress in the ways the pacing Needs it to be progressing), so maybe shes less of a Very Punctual Phone Answerer and more of a Deus Ex Machina Phone Answerer.
mc, realizing that shes been answering her phone VERY punctually: ....oh god, something big is gonna happen soon, isnt it? D:
it's like the phone-answering equivalent of when Boss Music suddenly starts playing
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2nd place: artem
while artem is also a workaholic nerd like mc, hes in second and Worse because i like to think that he sometimes he gets so focused on work he doesnt realize his phone's vibrated off his desk onto the floor. or sometimes he gets so buzzed up on too many coffees in a row that he just assumes that any vibrations happening in his reality is Normal. basically, too much coffee gives him the jitters, so artem essentially goes on Vibrate Mode too.
celestine: i just watched your phone vibrate itself off of your desk, how did you not notice???
artem, trembling because of overwork and caffeine and speaking very fast: uhwellyouseeit'sbecause---
celestine: ah.
artem on vibrate mode + phone on vibrate mode = they cancel out.
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3rd place: vyn
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good at answering the phone provided you follow his schedule. also, vyn will not hesitate to block the numbers of repeat offenders.
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4th place: luke
luke seems like the type who would WANT to be very punctual in answering his phone, but sometimes he gets super duper focused on a case or a new gadget and the Extreme Focus blocks him out from hearing his phone's ringtone for 3 hours straight. or he breaks his phone accidentally while hes doing something fighty or parkouring so he can get to mc's place in record time. OR peanut has made it a fun little game to swipe "decline call!" whenever he sees that luke's phone is lighting up.
or all of the above, all together.
luke: hey im SO sorry i missed your calls for three days straight. on the first day i was just distracted, on the second day i had to use my phone as a projectile weapon, and on the third day peanut kept ending all my incoming calls and then took my phone and flew off with it and i have NO idea where it is anymore
aaron: normally, i'd call bullshit, but youre exactly the type of person to get hit by all that consecutively.
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5th place: marius
i know in my heart that this man probably has 4 separate phones, each for different purposes. one is for Pax work matters, the second is for NXX work matters, the third is for schoolwork communicating with his professors and the such, and the last one is for personal contacts.
the nxx team are in both the NXX Specific Phone and the Personal Phone, sans vyn who used to be on all the non-pax phones until vyn blocked the phone number of marius' school phone because marius kept texting him questions about the reading at 1am, so now marius has to text vyn his schoolwork questions from the other two phones.
contacts aside, all phones are near CONSTANTLY going off because he is busy as HELL. if he only had one phone and wasnt juggling all these different matters, he'd be super punctual. alas, marius just has So Much To Attend to, and when marius needs to Have A Moment To Himself To Be Sane, he foists off the first 3 non-personal-usage phones to vincent like hes a phone babysitter.
vincent, cradling 3 phones in his arms like they are babies all vibrating with notifications and texts and email alerts: master von hagen, your children need you :(
marius, rhythmically thunking his head on his desk: UUUGGHHHHHHHHHHHH
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