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dramalets · 5 months

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2024 Watch List pt1

Here we go again!

To sir, with love - This is a lakorn so it's appropriately dramatic. The mothers are absolutely foul and do an awful lot of scheming and yelling. Jam/Film are intensely watchable and make wet fish kisses look terribly romantic. Tongtong Kitsakorn as Yang was a revelation. I'm sad he's pm just a lakorn actor/pop star because he is so watchable. I loved that, though they were evil and insane, the mothers all felt fleshed out and realised. You understood why they were yikes. 3½/5 (2/1/23)

A Boss & a Babe - I quit this at episode 2 and then decided to go back to it. I don’t regret doing so. This isn’t top tier but it’s also not shit tier. Cher, the very dictionary definition of toxic positivity, and Gun, an autism coded cat man, enter into an extremely quick romance (like seriously, it’s taken hard worn lesbians longer to say I love you) the catch being they’re intern and company boss. Honestly in another drama that would have been the the huge hiccup of the series, keeping them apart, but it’s consistently shown to be more of an issue for others that it is for them. This is very low conflict, mostly romcom fluff with two weirdly intense, barely explored side stories for support characters. I didn’t loath Force in this and would actually like him to be given more roles where he’s just a soft simp and not a boring sarcastic one. Book does some good comedy work here. 3/5 (4/1/23)

The day I loved you - I know this won’t work for everyone. It’s a bittersweet ten episode love story between a boy with ASL and the ‘rebel’ exchange student at his school. Pinoy BL, for me, either really hits or really misses and this hit. It does use a questionable model of disability, namely the inspiration model, but I cant nit pick too much when this is only ten 15/20 minute episodes. I enjoyed it a lot, you may also if you’re okay with a bittersweet ending vs an out and out happy one. 3½/5 (12/1/24)

VIP Only - Well this was adorable. Slow as molasses and just as sweet. This probably won’t be for everyone, very slow and not much happens other than character growth and a love story, but it worked for me. The edit is horrendous in places and I do wish Taiwan did longer episodes, but those are my only gripes. 3½/5 (19/1/24)

I cannot reach you - I don’t really watch Jbl. There are just styles and tropes that I don’t enjoy watching that Japan uses a lot of. It’s a taste thing more than it is anything else. So keep that in mind. This is full of a lot of the things I don’t like; over action, randomly running everywhere, sudden non-con. But it’s also endearingly sweet and very well acted, so I did find myself enjoying it. I don’t think this’ll awaken a desire to watch lots of Jbl but it has made me consider some others. 3/5 (20/1/24)

Last Twilight - I had a lot of fun with this. The dialogue and acting were all top notch and, as ever with Aof productions, it was stunning to look at. It weaves the story of two broken people healing one another very well with Jimmy & Sea doing beautiful work as Mhok & Day. I think this came a little unstuck at points in the end. I liked most of the romance movie style ending but I remain a little unsure about Day’s ending. Still, this is a show that I enjoyed every week and will have no issues rewatching. 4/5 (26/1/24)

Old Fashion Cupcake - I’m working on trying out more JBL to get a feel for what I do and don’t like. This? This I like. We don’t have enough stories about older people anyway and this does it well. Togawa’s slow courting of Nozue through shared experiences and casual intimacy is delicious to watch. 4/5 (4/2/24)

Pit Babe - I love when I show wholly knows what it is and doesn’t try and be anything but that. This knew it was a big ol’ fanfic and leaned wholeheartedly into that. Whether it was the breeding program subplot or the consistently dumb toothpaste and sausage ppl it handled them both with equal aplomb. It’s also worth noting that was largely really well acted too! Pavel, Nut & Sailub particularly impressed me but there was nobody bad. 4/5 (9/2/24)

Our Dining Table - My journey into JBL continues and this was the best one yet. Soft pining between two sad boy leads with a gorgeous found family story woven in. The treacle slow courting between these two won’t be for everyone but it was wholly for me. 5/5 (17/2/24)

Cooking Crush - The edit on this was criminally bad at points, sometimes I truly felt I’d skipped a part and I hadn’t at all, but it still served up a good little story. If you’re visiting this for the romance it’s not really that, the story is in the friends and their lives more than it is in Ten & Prem’s romance. I loved the comedy in this, it hit those notes well and was never over the top. (Lots of puns that I expect are super good if you speak Thai.) Nobody is bad in this, everyone delivers, but OffGun are as watchable as they always are and the few kisses they do have are perfect. 3/5 (18/2/24)

The Novelist - When I say I don’t love JBL it’s usually because the tropes are just too tropey for my tastes. Apparently I’m a lying liar who lies because this is extremely Japanese and I loved every moody second of it. Kijima is a sad, lonely, messed up man who doesn’t think he’s deserving of anything good and it’s wildly compelling to watch. 4/5 (18/2/24)

Mood Indigo - Fucked up 4 Fucked up. Two broken, sad, lonely men mess up repeatedly, and erotically, that’s it that’s the show and I ate it up with a spoon. Deeply flawed assholes being toxic together, when it’s well written and well acted, is so disgustingly watchable to me and this certainly was. 5/5 (18/2/24)

The Novelist: Playback - Continues where The Novelist ends. I watched the clean version of this, it was what was available to me, and was still deeply entertained. So if you think people watch this series for the heat then you’re incorrect. This is another instalment of Kijima Rio being a horribly broken fuck up of a man. I loved it. 4/5 (21/2/24)

Tokyo in April is… - I love a good destined to be together trope when it’s done well and this is done beautifully. Kazuma and Ren fall in love as teenagers and are separated before finding one another again as adults. The pacing on this is a little rough, I get what they were doing with the sub-plot but it felt mildly unneeded and time would have been better given to exploring our leads generally or even Ren’s painful family issues. This is still a lovely drama that I wholly recommend. 4/5 (21/2/24)

#jen rambles #to sir with love #a boss and a babe #the day I loved you #VIP only #I cannot reach you #last twilight #old fashion cupcake #pit babe #our dining table #cooking crush #The Novelist #Mood Indigo #playback #tokyo in april is...

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overlydramaticinephile · 2 years

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just one kiss.

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Fem! Reader (no physical descriptions)

Summary: Y/N happens to be falling for Steve but does he feel the same way? (Again, pretty bad summary)

Word count: 4.1k (im surprised tbh)

Warnings: Friends to lovers trope, based in the aftermath of season 4 but without the sad parts, douche behaviour, mostly fluff though. Pretty much another teen movie vibes fic. some cursing. shy!reader but also kind of a mess!reader (English is NOT my first language)

A/N: Hi! So, i'm like the biggest sucker for 00s teen drama sooooo i decided to re-write season 4 of the oc (ryan x taylor) for steve and reader. <3 this might be awful or...a good idea idk yet. THEREFORE, reader is like an OFC but not really, i say that bc there are a few mentions of her family. ALSO bc this is based on taylor townsend reader has some interesting characteristics but i love that character so much and idk i think it would be pretty cool to se a different kind of reader :)) so anyway if you made it this far...HOPE YOU ENJOY ILY

READ PART 2 HERE

Y/N L/N has always felt like she's living on the sidelines of the interesting life in Hawkins. She was the party's original babysitter and that's pretty much the only reason she found out about the Upside Down. Or that's what she likes to believe because it's easier to try to figure out why she feels so lonely all the time even when surrounded by so many people who are compassionate and loyal. I guess it all started with that little voice in her head telling her all kinds of bad things about herself and what others must have thought of her. As a kid, that voice was barely a whisper, mainly appeared when she felt anxious or guilty, but as she grew older, in her teenage years…that's when it all started to change. I wish I could say for the better though. Her anxiety just grew, and people just thought she was odd, which is way too dramatic, but high school, right? Judgment was in everyone's shadow.

Of course, she had always heard of Steve Harrington, hell, they were in the same grade but for Y/N, high school was just an enter, take classes, leave, sort of thing. While Steve lived for high school. He was their king after all.

In the year 1984 though, Y/N started to notice Steve more when he ended up helping a very dorky-looking Dustin Henderson while Y/N was babysitting, which they all forgot she was doing until they saw her casually hanging out in his house like she did every other day. From that day on, Y/N saw Steve Harrington in a different light. And she also noticed the change. She first noticed when Steve told Nancy, aka the girl who just a few days prior had broken his heart to go after Jonathan. Yeah, no one really saw that coming but no one really thought of it too much, except for Y/N of course, who after hearing the story from her lab partner about Tina's party made her catch up on the "drama" and to say she was intrigued would be an understatement.

By 1985, Y/N finally made what she felt was her first genuine friend that wasn't a 13-year-old or someone she technically worked for. Yeah, Robin Buckley. And when she found out she was working with Steve at the new mall…well, that made them more than acquaintances. Or that's what she thought. But the truth is Steve didn't see Y/N with that admiration and puppy eyes she did for him and most of the time it didn't bother her because it wasn't something new, but occasionally when that voice I was talking about would creep in, she couldn't help but feel…doomed. Again, dramatic, but that's 18-year-olds for you.

One day Y/N had enough. And by one day, I mean, the night she saw Sixteen Candles for what would be the first time of many. She decided she would not wait around or feel sorry for herself like Samantha, even though Molly Ringwald became her new role model. She would start gaining Steve's heart or…at least try.

Later that week Y/N went to visit Robin to get some info on Steve's dating life and what he thought of her…if he ever did that is.

Y/N entered the familiar video store looking for Robin. She knew she hated to talk about Steve's dating life because let's face it, she heard about it a lot. More than she would like to admit. So, Y/N brought Robin her favorite type of bagel in hopes to convince her. Robin already suspected she had a thing for Steve, but she didn't want to push it for so many reasons.

“Oh no…” said Robin when she saw that I'm going to ask you for something, and I brought something to convince you face. And she did not want to hear about it right now, it's been a long day having a solo shift and all.

“Robin! Good, you're here.” Y/N approached her with all of her bubbly excitement that didn't really match that shy energy she portrayed sometimes.

“Actually…I was just-” anyone aside from Y/N could tell that even though Robin loved her and would take a bullet for her, the love life of one Steve Harrington was something she didn't want to discuss. At least not before a well-deserved nap.

“You might want to sit down. I have huge news and a favor to ask you.”

“You like Steve, and you want my help convincing him to date you?” Robin deadpanned. If they were going to do this, at least she wanted to be straightforward about the issue at hand.

“Wow,” said Y/N surprised. Was she being obvious? Did she say something to make it obvious? Or did something? Yeah, hello inside voice.

“--It's kind of a giveaway. You said he's funny.” And there it was. Robin could not be any less thrilled about this, but this was her best friend after all.

Y/N decided to ignore that inside voice of hers by telling Robin all about this awakening she supposedly, suddenly had.

“It's crazy. I mean, I've always thought of him as a cute guy, might be good for a night of rough-and-tumble fun but it's not like we have anything in common.”

“So, ignore it, it's probably just gas.” could Robin convince her to not go there? That it would end up in just heartbreak? Because as much as she loved Y/N, she didn't really know if she was Steve's type. Steve's type being... Nancy Wheeler or, at least that was before Jonathan came back and Steve went through a second heartbreak.

“But then he helped with all the things that were happening at Hawkins and he grew into this…lovable cute guy, and it was like Dorothy landing in Oz, everything just popped into technicolor.” Y/N continued not being able to stop that growing smile of hers.

“Huh,” said Robin. She didn't really know what to say without unintentionally hurting her feelings.

Y/N's smile faded in a heartbeat; now her face held a sad look. “Do you think I don't know what that means?”

“I said, huh.” Robin was coming off as kind of a douche, but honesty was one of the things she loved most about the girl.

“Meaning, “huh, that Y/N, she is so pathetic. Someone's the least bit nice to her and she becomes totally obsessed with them, first that science tutor of hers and then the guy from New York when he lent her a subway ticket, now Steve.”

“Oh, you know, well isn't it’s kind of true?” Robin couldn't help but recall all those events being the first to hear about them. To say Y/N had attachment issues...well, we won't go there.

“So what? Yes. I have a psychological predilection to become romantically attached to men who are nice to me due to the fact that I was raised by a she-wolf of a mother who practiced emotional terrorism. Does that mean that if by some miracle love does come into my life, I should deny it? What kind of person would that make me mhm? What kind of life?”

Y/N was rambling and at this point, how could she explain her feelings when they have all ended up in some sort of humiliation? One would think she would give up but... she always had hope, people had to give her that.

“Okay, okay, Y/N, what do you want me to do?”

Like if Y/N knew her love life would get Robin to agree she went back to that excited tone she had on earlier. “Find out if he's ready to start dating.”

------------------------------------

Robin called Steve's house knowing that he had the day off and was probably sleeping or feeling sorry for himself. That seemed to be a recurring theme around Hawkins nowadays.

“Hello.”

“Hey,” said Steve recognizing Robin’s voice instantly.

“Uh so, glad your home. Finished the movie last night?” she had to make it seem like a natural conversation but starting with the small talk was probably not the most Robin thing to say.

“Which one?”

“Aha. Are you ready to date again?” Again, Robin couldn't help but want to get to the point so she could finish this argument for the day.

“What?” Steve was taken back. First, Robin got used to getting annoyed with Steve's endless dating life stories, now, she clearly was asking if he was ready to start dating again after... Nance the sequel.

“Simple question.” you could tell the urgency in Robin’s voice.

“I have no idea. Why?” said Steve confused.

“Okay. Cool.” that's when Robin hung up the family video phone and told Y/N about the short conversation she just had.

"He's not sure," said Robin, begging for this to be over.

"Interesting." Well, it wasn't a no per se so, Y/N's hope was definitely intact.

-----------------------------------

Later that week Y/N tried to get closer to Steve, by showing up to his shifts and renting random movies he would recommend, hoping Steve would come and pick Dustin up when she was babysitting, she even went out of her comfort zone to try and met him at some of the most popular spots for teenagers. But nothing seemed to work, she was convinced Steve was not interested at all; these were all big coincidences and formalities. Not gonna lie, that crushed her spirit a little bit. Therefore, she was now laying on her bed feeling sorry for herself like one normally does of course.

That's when her sister came in shouting.

“Y/N did you take my lip gloss with the bee pheromones on it?”

“It's on the dresser…” Y/N's voice sounded sad and defeated which caught her sister's attention.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, peachy.” the sarcasm was great in these types of moments.

“Talk.”

Y/N sighed, even though she really didn't want to talk about it she could use some sisterly advice and from someone who won't try to judge her or look down on her.

“Okay, so, what do you do when you like a boy, and he barely knows you're alive and you already pretended to be his money advisor and I'm…out of options.” she cringed at her own words realizing how crazy she was sounding right now.

“Okay…Well, this may sound a little weird but try dressing up fabulous and going to a place where you'll run into him.” said her sister as a matter of factly, like this was some common knowledge that maybe Y/N never heard about.

“That's it?” Y/N sat up looking at her sister better to tell if she was being serious. And she was.

“That's it.”

“That really works?” Y/N couldn't believe it, that sounded way too simple and maybe just maybe she shouldn't have tried too hard.

“Almost every time” her sister decided to continue sharing some of the tips she had learned over the years. “And I mean, touching his arm when you guys are talkin, it's always good, dancing, and body contact and laugh at his jokes- I mean, even if they're not that funny.”

“Oh! I do that already! Okay, what else?” Y/N excitement was coming out again as if it was restoring itself and was ready to try again.

“You could…walk in front of him, I mean if he's a butt guy…”

Y/N looked serious for a moment thinking about what she just said. “I don't know if he's a butt guy…”

“Well, it can't hurt, I mean sis, you have a great butt.” she knew her sister could use all the confidence in the world right now and she was more than happy to provide it, in the end, Y/N has always been there for her, and she wanted nothing but the best for her.

“You're such a sweetie! Tell me more.”

---------------------------------

A few days later some girl from high school was throwing a party for Hawkins High class of '84. Meaning, that Y/N and Steve would be there. Probably Robin too now that he and Robin were pretty much glued to the hip.

So, of course, Y/N saw this as the perfect opportunity. She dressed up like her sister told her to, she decided on this pastel pink dress with some puffy sleeves, lace on top and a cute flower pattern, to be honest, it was a little too girly for her taste, she almost went back to change into her baggy jeans and an oversized colorful sweater but she knew that wouldn't catch Steve's attention so she chose her first option in the hopes to not embarrass herself in the process.

Arriving at the party Y/N found this new confidence in herself at least for the next few hours she thought.

“Hello Steve,” she said giving him her best put-together smile while shoving all her nerves inside.

“Y/N, hi…you look um…” Steve was stunned, no reason to lie here. To say he wasn't expecting her in that outfit would be...correct.

“I look nice?” Y/N said probably too quickly. To this moment we can't tell if it was intentional or not.

“Nice, yeah. That's the word I was looking for.” Steve mumbled that last part. Truth is, she looked gorgeous anyone could see that but he couldn't help but notice she didn't really look like herself but who was he to judge on her fashion choices? So, he let it go.

“Well, so do you. Would you like to dance?” Part two of Y/N's plan was getting close to Steve in hopes to talk more.

Steve's eyes widen, he didn't really do dancing anymore. “Actually, I'm not much of a dancer, probably shocking.”

“Maybe you'll learn” Y/N cringed at herself and how she was supposed to think before she talked. “Not that I'm a teacher or anything, of course. It's just you know…fun.” she had to stop her rambling somewhere...

Steve couldn't help but smile. “Yeah, okay.”

“Okay.” With that Y/N returned that smile in no time, hoping she didn't look too eager.

Steve and Y/N realized this was a fancy house party when they suddenly started to play Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper. Probably not their first choice, they were hoping for a little Toto or maybe even Billy Joel. So, after that awkward moment of shall we really slow dance? passed and Steve gestured for Y/N in a May I have this dance matter she giggled and put her arms around his neck while he was curling up by her waist.

“We did not hate you,” said Steve now talking to Y/N about the old days at Hawkins High when he was King Steve. Knowing about supernatural creatures and graduating in the same year was about everything they had in common so for a topic of discussion they decided to talk about the latter.

“Oh, you totally hated me, come on, you were probably the president of we hate Y/N club.” Everyone could tell Y/N was shy and an introverted soul, but she could take a punch either it meant literally or emotionally. But of course, this conversation was meant to be outgoing and fun, leaving all their cringy selves in the open.

“I was the secretary. I took the notes.”

“Steve! you made a real joke.” Y/N couldn't help but crack a smile so big that her cheeks started hurting.

Steve got a little shy and he mumbled a little bit. “Yeah… a pretty bad one but I made a real joke, thank you but don't tell anyone.”

After that, the song ended and before it became awkward again, Steve decided to do something about it before it was too late. He was actually having fun after all.

“You wanna drink?”

“That'd be nice.”

Steve walked to the kitchen to get himself and Y/N a drink when he noticed Robin walk in with a grin on her face. Of course, she saw that whole scene.

“Hey,” said Steve without really looking at her, too busy serving the right drinks. Something with a fruity flavor for Y/N he thought.

“Hey! saw ya dancing with Y/N.” And there it was.

That made Steve look in her direction for a moment. “Yeah. Is that look supposed to mean something?” he deadpanned, of course, he knew she was implying something.

“Crazier things have happened. Nothing I can't recall this instant.”

Steve didn't find this conversation amusing. For some reason, he started to realize he was getting defensive about the topic. It's not like it's the first time Robin had said something like that but about a different girl of course. “Okay. I don't think so.”

“Ask yourself why. She's smart, she's funny-” You could tell Robin had really thought about what Y/N had said to her and decided to support her friend.

“Buckley just forget about it okay? I'm not gonna date Y/N.”

And of course, with the great luck they usually had, Y/N had just walked to see if Steve needed help with the drinks. Robin noticed her first and gave her this apologetic look, of course, she didn't want her to feel bad and the same applied to Steve, so he cursed himself for saying it out loud.

Y/N had this deer caught in the headlights look like she was just humiliated which would make sense.

“Ahm I was just…excuse me,” she said before walking off and leaving the house. Trying to find her keys as fast as possible so she could just drive away and forget this ever happened.

“Y/N, Y/N whoa whoa whoa hold on, let me explain.” Steve got out himself trying to stop her.

“I think you were pretty clear Steve. And yes, I lied when you asked me that one time if I liked you but…what was I thinking I mean, you and me? It's just…I must be totally crazy-”

“You're not crazy, okay?” he said in a heartbeat. Probably didn't even realize it.

“Steve, I pretended to be your money advisor to seduce you.”

Huh. Yeah, he kinda did forget about that. “Well, that was crazy.”

“Don't worry because I'm sure next week I'll be totally obsessed with some guy who gives me change for parking,” she said sarcasm dripping down every word.

“Look, what I said has absolutely nothing to do with you okay? It's just that…”

“What? That…for the longest time all you could feel was your desire to get back Nancy Wheeler but now that's gone so you feel empty, can't feel anything, least of all anything for me?”

Steve opened and closed his mouth a few times after he found any words. Because believe it or not she did have that effect on him. To leave him speechless. Why? That he didn't know yet.

“How do you keep doing that?”

“Doing what?” said Y/N confused.

“That. You keep telling me what I'm thinking before I feel it.”

Oh. “Because I think about you. I want you to be happy and I think that if you gave it a chance you might feel something too.” she thought what the hell better lay everything down now that he knows, she wasn't expecting on telling him like this but like always she remained hopeful.

“Y/N…” Shit. Steve didn't want to hurt her feelings I mean; he knew what it felt like to be rejected after pouring your heart out to someone and he felt like crap to do it to someone else.

But before he could continue Y/N decided to answer for him.

“Are you gonna tell me that you really like me as a friend?” she narrowed her eyes and it felt like she could see right through his soul.

Damn. She's good. “Maybe…?”

Clearly, that's the worst thing he could have said when she just walked away with this annoyed pace if that even is a thing. Leaving Steve alone with his thoughts.

“How did she do that?”

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Later that night Y/N decided to visit Robin's house. Even though tonight was a total wreck she had one last thing to do. Which made her knock on Robin’s door hoping she would answer. And she did.

“Robin,” said Y/N in this sad tone.

“Y/N! What are you doing here?” she wasn't expecting her at 1 in the morning outside her house.

“Um…when I had really bad grades last year, my sister's boyfriend gave me this finances guide and I thought it might help Steve with his problems, I would have given it to him before, but I was trying to seduce him so…” she couldn't help and look at her shoes. Realizing she hasn't changed from her Cinderella outfit if you will.

“So, why can't you just give it to him?”

“Because. I'm too embarrassed. You were totally right. Here I am, trying to get into college and living like a refugee at my sister's, and Steve's nice to me so I fall for him? it's just totally pathetic. Just, please give that to him.”

Well shit, now Robin felt even more terrible.

“Wow, I never thought I would see you quitting.”

That made Y/N look up in surprise. “What? It's completely hopeless Robin, you heard him.”

“Yeah no, it's just, you rolling over like an old dog…not the Y/N I remember…”

“Are you seriously trying to Jedi mind trick me?” Y/N deadpanned.

“Y/N L/N, quitter. I guess I'll just have to get used to that.”

Sure, Y/N's ego was a little bruised, but Robin was kinda right, that was taking it too far. Hell, she has fought Demogorgons and she was scared to face Steve Harrington? No. No way.

“Fine.”

---------------------------------

Y/N soon realized Steve was staying at Robin's for the night due to not wanting to be in his big house alone for the night, so, why not crash with your best friend after a long day?

“Hi,” Y/N said as she walked into the living room where Steve was putting a duvet on the big couch so he could sleep there.

“Hey…” Steve looked up in surprise.

“Um…I brought you some books. I'm not trying to be your advisor I just thought it might help you.” truth be told, Y/N didn't know why she had to do this in the middle of the night, maybe she had a feeling, maybe she wasn't ready to give up.

“Thanks.” Steve said dryly.

“What am I doing?” Y/N turned around ready to leave the house feeling utterly pathetic for what felt like the tenth time that night.

“Woah hold on. Look, I gotta say something.” Steve had been thinking of what to say to her again since she left the party.

“Um…I think you've got this idea that you're this strange person that has to trick people into liking her and it's not true, you're um, you're amazing.”

Y/N was in awe, she definitely didn't expect that. She couldn't help to laugh either.

“Oh my god, you just did it to me.”

“Did what?”

“Said exactly what I was feeling. Well, except for the me being amazing part.”

Steve smiled at that. “Well, it's true and uh…honestly you know, I wish I did feel something.”

Y/N thought for a moment. This might be a huge mistake but since she was here putting herself on the line again. Why not? Her dignity was already in a questionable situation.

“Kiss me.”

Well, Steve wasn't expecting that. He looked at her trying to understand if he heard that right.

“Uh…what?”

“I think that there's something there and I think that if you kiss me, you'll feel it too.”

“Uh, I don't think that's how it works?”

“Come on, if you don't feel anything, I will never mention it again. That's the best deal you'll ever get, ask Robin. Just one kiss.”

Truth be told, Steve wasn't sure why he found this so difficult, it's not like he hasn't kissed girls just for the hell of it, but something did feel different. Deep down maybe he was scared that he would actually feel something. He didn't believe this was a thing, but you never know.

“One kiss…one kiss,” he said coming closer.

“Okay,” said Y/N leaning in.

Y/N wasn't an excellent kisser that she knew of, she had only kissed one guy before but there was something that told her that if he was the one, the kiss would be perfect either way.

So, Y/N kissed Steve. It was tender and soft, one kiss turned into two. Steve's body was frozen except for his lips. He wanted to cup her face and pull her even closer but was it because he hadn't been kissed like that in a long time? Or was he actually feeling something? That's when Y/N pulled away interrupting his thoughts. He was surprised which led to him making this shocked face.

“I'm sorry.”

Y/N felt like a ton of bricks just had hit her. What did she do? She couldn't help but look at her feet again and run away.

Steve didn't call after her, he just stood there, still frozen, processing everything that just happened since she walked in. His thoughts were racing mainly "What the fuck just happened" he decided to lie on the couch and whatever had just burst into him...he would figure out tomorrow.

FEEDBACK IS GREATLY APPRECIATED <3

Pretty please leave a comment if you think I should make this a series

It's probably pretty bad but idk I just finished college so I thought I would occupy my time while I find a job :))

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve stranger things #steve harrington imagine #stranger things #stranger things x reader #joe keery #joe keery x reader #joe keery imagine #fanfic

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azulas-lightning-bolt · 29 days

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sooo in regards to @korrasgonefishing’s post that I rb mentioning my fem!mako post and how I was talking about how the bending brothers’ batman ahh backstory would be even more tragic for a little girl because humans can be miserable creatures and they were like ‘oh but what if it was more chill’ and then got talking about bloodstains and I was thinking

oh. mako was orphaned at 8 years old. her mom never would’ve had time to teach her little girl about periods because why would she? they have all the time in the world.

and that’s got me thinking, damn, she wouldn’t have known anything about girlhood. maybe the prostitutes who take pity might tell her the blood doesn’t mean she’s dying, but they probably don’t have much more to teach her that she wants to know, nor would many care to spare the time. and im sure canon mako was the same, not really knowing anything about what to do when he got older, only able to teach bolin how to shave when he’s got a million little nicks on his own face from trial and error.

and that was sad again, my apologies. but it could be happy! and guess howwwwww,, momboss and daughtercop!

so since they’re the sillies ever and also chronically emotionally impaired, their girlhood bonding moment when mako fucks up. (also both of them not really having ‘girlhood’ because of shit ass childhoods… hmm beifong family angst save me…. wait lin beifong learning how to girl on her own because toph never thought to teach her… toph realizing she fucked up way too late because it wasn’t forcing her girl to be a dolly the way toph’s parents had forced her, she just wanted to learn how 2 use eyeshadow,,,, beifong angst save me)

so anyways. mako is so #silly and unaware that chronic lesbianism exists so she’s trying to comphet so hard and going on dates with the biggest fuckin douchebags ever (bcuz they’re ‘manly’ and she has a reason other than being queer for not really liking them) and trying to convince herself she does like them. and essentially she finds this one guy who realllllly fucks her over and he comes into the station to try and embarrass her too, going off about how she could use some makeup and that she acts more like a man than him and. ouch. because she’s always had this problem, she tries to make herself a role model for bolin, but she hates it because being a girl is a piece of her identity that literally cannot be taken away and she’s just letting herself lose it? my fem!mako is cis but she has so many gender feelings because. yeah.

anyway lin to the rescue! who tf are YOU to come into MY station and harass MY officer? I suggest you walk ur smelly ass right back out or you don’t want to find the fuck out what I can charge you with. cuz she’s silly.

and then cue sullen pissy mako cuz she’s like… 18. she’s still a teenager and one of her biggest insecurities just got targeted in front of all her coworkers who she knows already don’t respect her. so she’s miserable the rest of the day,,, until lin to the rescue again!!!

she pulls her daughter aside cuz she’s worried (not that she’ll say so) and is like. don’t let him get to you cuz he’s an asshole and doesn’t really have much worth saying and less worth listening to. you’re allowed to wear light makeup and stuff at the station if you want to, and if you’re really bugged I can pinch someone’s ear to get you some accommodations. because she’s mother.

but then mako is like I FONT KNOW HOWWWW and crying cuz she’s lowkey devastated she never had someone to teach her… anything. she doesn’t really know how to use pads (being broke means you learn how to make bootlegs of, like, everything), she’s never even owned makeup, she hasn’t worn a dress since she was 7, and she doesn’t know any of the girl things every girl seems to know because she has no mom‼️‼️

and lin goes. hm. I am tragically reminded of myself right now. instead of Dealing with that, I’m going to aggressively help and thus permanently insert myself as a mother figure in my favorite kid’s life. so she, over time and gradually less awkward invitations to her house, teaches mako how to use makeup, slightly enjoying being able to experiment with mako’s uniquely distinct features. she teaches her about period cycles and how to cope, and goes shopping for pretty clothes that she insists on paying for at the last second (“you paid for the food already.” “yeah, chief, from the CHEAPEST VENDOR IN RC?? I thought you hated their food!?” she does. she knew mako needed to pay for something, and felt bad picking anything pricey.) and tells mako about her own girlhood and they both are girls.

this is insane wish fulfillment for me btw. what I could’ve had w my mom if I was normal lololol but anyway. I hope that got silly enough at the end cuz I was thinking about my own comphet era writing this and it hurt my soul a little bit !!

#I went kind of insane and wrote this all in one sitting.#I’d normally schedule this to post tmr but I felt like I had to choke it out now #and I’ve got 2 other longpost drafts that I haven’t touched since I last opened tumblr like.#two centuries ago #not counting whenever I made that dumbass post #likr #yesterday #or whatever #dying #fem mako #atla #mako lok #lok #tlok #slug’s stuff #mako tlok

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angeltreasure · 1 year

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I saw something the other day I think another anon but it made me think so this is pathetic probs anyway like I know your answer esp because you’re a woman of God and I’m tryna get closer to him. Is outer beauty all that matters I know everyone is all different and God made us and things happen and inner beauty is what God sees too. One of my old friends said being ‘skinny’ and looking like a model and having perfect face is the goal and everything it just made me feel sad for all reasons

No. Outer beauty is not all that matters. We don’t stay young forever but money talks so that’s why you see all kinds of things people try in order to stretch their youth and make them appear younger. That’s why you see so many beauty product commercials, plastic surgeries, strange fashions worn by people clearly too old to wear them, photoshop photos for magazines and movies to slim down models and sexualize women, AI photo filters, people posting older photos as their profile picture to trick others, etc!

People will spend thousands and thousands of dollars to make themself appear to have eternal youth. Some go to extremes with surgery. Some try other methods not as expensive such as restrictive dieting, getting a new haircut, medication over the counter, using tiktok filters, etc. It ends up becoming trendy and leads younger and younger people to want a certain unattainable image. Then the younger crowd below them sees how they behave and try to copy them. Ballerinas look pretty when they dance but a lot of them suffer eating disorders.

Youth and prime don’t last forever. We age in this life if God wills that we live long enough. Over time, our cells don’t divide as fast so bruises and wounds take longer to heal. We get wrinkles and our skin can even feel rough. Our hair color will most likely change to grey and white depending on our genes. If we don’t use our muscles they can break down. Joints wear out. We can get stretch marks. Our fertility declines once reaching a certain age, or earlier from medical conditions and complications. Bones become sponge if we don’t take care of them. And more. Aging is normal. It’s supposed to be normal.

When we become skinny, there is a certain BMI that is dangerous depending on if we are male or female and how tall we are. Being super skinny or underweight isn’t without consequences. When people forcefully starve their own bodies to drop dramatically in weight, it can cause permanent organ damage. If we binge eat by forcing ourselves to throw up constantly you can damage all of your teeth and gums. Blood pressures drop causing you to pass out. White blood cell counts can start to decline, making it harder for your body to fight offensively against disease, and more. Eventually, once the body is too weak and when you stop eating altogether, you can even die. Please don’t try any of those eating disorders!

No one has a perfect face except God. We humans can’t even look upon in this life or we can literally die.

The goal is not to be a super skinny model for likes and attention and praise from men but rather, our true goal for you and I is to become saints. Don’t waste your life away in this life trying to give yourself the fountain of youth and materialism. Instead, store your treasures up in Heaven and keep the faith.

Don’t look to movie stars and Victoria Secret models. Look instead for our the example of Our Lady, Mary. She was so filled with grace and never sinned. She was full of virtue and was taken straight to Heaven. She was closest to Jesus. Look at her beauty instead and model after her wanting to do the will of God. Her beauty shines not by skinniness but by grace and love, Motherly love. Turn to our lady and our Lord and pray the Rosary. It is a powerful Bibical prayer that will get your mind off body appearances and instead to focus on the lives of Jesus and Mary. Turn away from worldly desires and instead, pray the Rosary each day and go to Mass.

#asks

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legolasghosty · 7 months

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Toy Store AU!

I AM SO SORRY ABOUT HOW LONG THIS TOOK! I blame college.

ANYWAYS...

This is more of a toy factory(but like the fun kind) than a store, but that's the vibes I'm feeling. The Molina family runs a toy business, making super cool stuff from scratch rather than all that cheap plastic stuff that gets mass produced. It's a Molina family tradition that Ray married into(Yes Molina is Rose's last name, you can pry that headcanon out of my cold, dead hands).

Rose was the master of all things woodwork, and passed on many of these skills to her daughter. Their house has always been filled with little carved animals, handmade dishes, and lovely woodburned signs on the bedroom doors. Ray was slightly terrified when Rose started teaching Julie to carve pretty young, but it was mostly without serious injury.

Ray is better at the stuffed side of the toy world. He and Rose met when he was an apprentice in the stuffy workshop and she was learning the ropes from her dad. They fell slow and steady (Rose's parents shipped it from the beginning), even when Ray took some time away to act as the tour photographer for his friend, Trevor. Rose and Trevor ended up being good friends as well when they finally met!

Back to the present, Julie has just come back from a year away at boarding school. It wasn't anyone's first choice, but after Rose died, trying to be around the toy store was just too much for her. Boarding school was Tia's idea, as a way to give her some space to find herself. It helped some, but Julie comes home for the summer sick of being the girl with the dead mom. It's still hard to enter the workshop space though, so she starts working at the shop part of the business instead.

Enter Flynn, who got the cashier job back in January. The two of them become fast friends, bonding over stupid Karens, after hours restocks, and helping kids find just the right new friend. Julie discovers a surprising link between them, that being that Flynn is dating Carrie, Trevor's daughter. Trevor and Carrie hadn't been around much since Rose passed, so Julie hadn't seen Carrie in ages, but they start to get to know each other again through Flynn. It's sweet!

Alex grew up near the factory and he and Julie were super good friends as kids. They still are. Ray and Rose took a liking to him as well. So when he showed up one night when he was 16, explaining that his parents had found out he was gay and made it clear that they wouldn't be paying for anything for him outside of the roof he was 'allowed' to share with them, they quickly got him a job. He floated through positions for a while, doing well in most areas but just trying to find something that he really loved. He's settled at the moment as a delivery driver for the store. He likes the freedom of it, and how concrete it is. He's the best driver they have.

Reggie and Luke are partway into their first year as workshop apprentices. Luke mostly applied to satisfy his mom, who was angry about him not going to college, but he has discovered the fun of music boxes and maybeeee is slightly obsessed. Reggie has ended up in Ray's old position as the stuffy apprentice with his knack for tidy stitches and adding a bit of love to every single one.

Luke ends up poking around a bit in a closet of older models and stuff and finds some of Rose's music boxes(one of which has Julie's voice on it). He loves it and immediately goes to ask his boss/mentor, John, about it. John explains about Rose and how they all thought that Julie would follow in her footsteps as a woodworker, as she was one of the most talented he'd ever seen at such a young age, but how she hadn't been able to keep creating after losing her mom.

Not realizing that Julie is back now, at least for the summer, Luke gets sad but lets it go. And then she walks in on him listening to the music box in the break room a few days later. She kinda flips cause where the heck did he get that, and he goes on his whole thing about talent and art being something you have to let out. Julie ends up bolting into the workshop to get away. Luke is like, "Frick I came on too strong again didn't I..."

But who should Julie run into other than Reggie and Alex, who were packing up an order near the back of the space. And Alex immediately realizes she's having an anxiety attack and sits her down. Reggie grabs a big teddy bear for her to hug, and then ends up pulling Luke away when he comes in after her. After Julie calms down with help from Alex, Luke apologizes and they all just kinda... keep talking after that. And eventually Julie starts doing woodwork stuff again. The first thing she actually finishes is decal for Alex's bass drum with the logo of the boys' band on it. They all cry.

Andddd why must these always get so long when I do them? /nm

Anyways, hope you like it!!!!

#legolas tag #julie and the phantoms #legolas answers asks #jatp #also Willie is definitely around too #he's super good with electronic toys #and grew up in his uncle's toy store a couple of states over #but he bolted once he turned 18 cause uhhh... Caleb isn't the best boss... or parental figure...#but he had the skills still... so he just started working at the Molina's #he's still a little confused by the lack of disciplinary action if you don't meet the exact quota that gets set by someone higher up #but he is very much enjoying actually getting his lunch breaks #especially since he's managed to time them pretty well so he's in the break room at the same time as the cute delivery driver boy...

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lindszeppelin · 10 months

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Did you see Kaia (🤮) talk about being a teen with older men going after and dating her (on her book club today). I’m no fan, but I hate that she had to grow up so quickly. It’s mad f*cked up she went traveling the world at what, 14 or 15, to model and her parents didn’t seem to go with her. She makes references about realizing older men weren’t a good idea when she was 16 or 17.

Like, I’m glad she finally gets this but she doesn’t see how young she is still. She was barely out of her teens when her and Austin met. I’m on the fence about them being PR- I keep changing my mind- but I’ve never liked their relationship either or. It feels random, age gap is too much, and their body language is genuinely so bizarre when they’re together. (Even the kissing photos look so awkward and stiff when you see the video footage of them.) If they were 30 and 40, whatever. But she couldn’t even legally drink. It makes me almost sad for her that one day she’ll look back and realize this wasn’t the course correcting she thinks it is.

I like Austin but PR or not I think dating someone so young is a BAD look. I’m not saying he’s a predator but maybe lacking some maturity or boundaries that men should have at that age (or self awareness?). Not hating on him but his dating life makes me side eye him more than I’d like, What are your thoughts? Even if it is PR, who thought this was a good idea behind the scenes? They couldn’t have found at least a 25 year old? And I’m sorry, but after Lily Rose Depp too…makes him look cheap going after all of the nepo babies. Thoughts?

I don't watch Kaia's bookclubs so i did not hear that she mentioned that, until you said so. And it makes sense to me. Like i even heard she was modelling at age 10. Modeling is a dangerous world and full of predators that like to pray on girls. And knowing that she was forced to be around older men and grow up too fast for her age is concerning.

So it's no surprise to me that she's been paired with guy's older than her. Austin though is the oldest she's been with, and that's correct she wasn't even legal to drink when they started dating. And I think because she feels like she grew up around the adults in her life that now at 21 she feels like she's matured. And she has not.

It's obvious she is still insecure in herself, which is a normal thing to go through in your 20s. But she is not paired well with Austin, who is a grown man and she is out of her depth with how to handle a man like Austin's caliber romantically.

She's unfortunately used to being some kind of pawn. I mean hell, do I even need to bring Presley into this to see how Rande and Cindy fucked that kid up mentally? That boy is like a walking cry for help. But anyway. Yes. Austin and K are not well suited at all. And while it does make me feel bad for her that she was forced to be around all these adults too quickly and adapt, she is not as mature as she thinks she is. She needs more life experience.

and in regards to Lily Rose, the two knew each other from Yoga Hosers and it seemed like Austin reveres her father strongly. I mean clearly i think the two had a hot fling but nothing more.

let's not forget either that all of this (lily rose and meeting K) happened while Austin was still coming out of his identity crisis from Elvis and learning to get back into himself and his own body again. i think he made some interesting choices but now that he seems more like himself, he's realizing the bad choices he's made. it happens and he's human.

#lindsay's anon asks

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onceuponaloonatic · 9 months

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I'm obsessed with the misatzu au and their kids.. Also I'm obsessed with saki and eunji but I'd looove to get some more insight into ai and yuna's relationship. Great job author!

sorry this took so long! i had a whole post basically typed out and tumblr decided to delete it before i could finish the draft 😭😭 anyway i feel like i don't talk about these two very much so i went a little ham with headcanons lol sorry

i might be contradicting myself a little here, but i actually don't think these two are very close when they are kids

lemme explain

ai is very high energy, and she's the type of kid to run around and rough house and all that stuff, she's especially not shy (to the embarrassment of her parents at times)

even when she plays with barbies, it always involves a lot of moving and running around, and jihyo and momo actually struggle to contain her for a while

yuna is the exact opposite

she is a lot more quiet and prefers things like coloring or reading (with her mommies help!) and video games

as you can imagine, this doesn't mesh super well for young kids

their parents want them to be close, as their ages keep them from being in the traditional "kid squads" i've talk about before

ai desperately wants to be in the "older kid squad" (seojun, hyunjun, sai, kihyun) but she's just slightly too young to really keep up with their playing

yuna aligns more with the "younger kids squad" (daehyung, eunji, the triplets) but again she doesn't quite fit in since she's older than them

so their parents were hoping the two of them could be close

but it never really works out that well due to their different playing styles

their parents don't try to force it or anything, but they stop scheduling them play dates when they notice the girls aren't having the best time together

honestly, despite being in the same grade, they aren't super close for most of elementary school

ai is the super super out going kid on the playground, who always is running around and leading various games, where as yuna prefers playing on her ds or reading

ai kind of struggles making lasting friendships, since she bounces around between people so much, but yuna gets more and more shy throughout elementary school

theres not really a turning point in their relationship until hina is born

when eunji was born, ai wasn't really old enough to really know what being a "good big sister" meant

and while she was a good big sister to eunji, eunji was always close enough in age to her that she never needed to be super mature and take care of her sis (especially because eunji is a very responsible and practical person)

but when hina is born, ai starts to feel this pressure to "be a good example"

people start telling her she needs to be more mature and calm, since her parents are super busy with the baby, and that she needs to be a role model for her baby sister (not mohyo, but just random people in her life)

this is exacerbated by the fact that eunji is naturally more responsible, and people start to whisper that ai should be acting more her age and it's sad her little sister acted older than her

anyway this leads to ai basically breaking down at school one day when one of the other kids teased her about her being immature

and who finds her hiding in the tree at the back of the playground crying? yuna of course

yuna immediately panics because ai isn't the type to cry very much

ai spills everything in her mind and yuna just sits there and listens, not judging her and trying to be an active listener

ai eventually stops crying, and yuna pulls her into a little hug and tells her that she's a good big sister, and she acted completely normal for their age and her parents didn't expect her to be perfect

and ai just kind of falls into yuna's hug

anyway, after that ai gained a bit of an appreciation for yuna's quietness

she finds herself running over to sit with yuna during recess when she feels overwhelmed or upset, finding a way to entertain herself drawing in the sand or swinging or something

and yuna finds that it's nice to have someone to talk to between chapters of her book

they learn to love and appreciate the differences between the two of them, and by middle school they are besties!

ai still is very sociable, but she always sets aside time to talk to yuna

around seven or eighth grade, ai spends the whole summer in japan with momo's family, and when she gets back, she noticed that yuna is different

not that yuna is actually different, but she just never realized that yuna was so pretty or that she looked really cute in her little reading glasses or when she got a new book

and she starts to feel really weird around yuna, and that actually makes her really upset for a while cause she doesn't know what's wrong

yuna on the other hand also notices that ai is different after returning from japan, and she also starts to feel confusing feelings towards her

ai handles them by just being frustrated with herself, and it only gets worse when yuna starts to shut her out

their parents of course know what's happening, but they don't meddle

jihyo and jeongyeon find them amusing, nayeon finds them frustrating, and momo tries to think of ways to get the two alone together

it takes them a while to figure out what happened, and even longer to get together

but eventually by high school, they realize that they actually both just had huge massive crushes on each other and then they got together

i mentioned once that they were the first couple of the kids, and i still think that's true

they were really really nervous to tell their families they were dating

but their parents are super supportive and encouraging of their relationship

ai helps yuna meet new people and see the world, and yuna helps ai slow down from time to time and remember to take a breather 🥺

they aren't a super pda heavy couple, but yuna loves being scented

and ai loves scenting her so it's a win-win

they would totally have some cute couple thing though like matching bracelets or phone straps

nayeon always squeals when she sees them cuddling, so they prefer mohyo's house for their dates

nayeon ships it okay? she loves that her daughter found someone to bring her out of her shell

and mohyo love that yuna helps ai take a deep breath and manage her life a little

their parents are super careful not to get involved in their relationship though, as they don't want the two to feel like they are forced to be together

tbh i actually feel like mohyo in particular would want to give them freedom to explore each other and their relationship

makes sure they are educated on safe sex/healthy relationships though!!! (much to their chagrin)

they aren't always necessary talking to each other on dates, some dates are yuna curling up with a book in ai's bed while ai plays video games or practices dances for her dance classes or something

they are happy with this arrangement though :)

ai is still outgoing even as they get older, but yuna is comforted by the fact that at the end of the day, ai will always make time for her 🥺

#twice #park jihyo #hirai miyo #mohyo #ai #yuna #aina #im nayeon #yoo jeongyeon #2yeon

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cowboyjen68 · 2 years

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Hello Cowboy!

You have a really great blog, seeing your little updates and pictures always brighten my day. Like many, you are the only older lesbian I know, and it is always lovely to see you thriving and just living your life. I never felt like I could have a happy future being a lesbian, which is why it took me so long to accept this part of myself. Growing up, I never had any kind of lesbian role models in my life (I was way too old when I found out lesbians even existed lol), my mom’s childhood friend is a lesbian and she only came out a couple years ago (most people suspected she was one because she’s been unmarried and living with another woman for years, who is quite butch btw). And that woman is indeed her life partner. Anyway my mom’s friend is an older lesbian and she really really despises the younger generation of lgbt people. She makes fun and calls it the lgbtlmnopxyz community, stuff like that. And I was so disappointed when my mom told me, I kinda looked up to her since she’s the only older lesbian I know of. And now I’m scared that when she finds out I’m a lesbian, she’ll think bad things of me too.

Anyway I’ve just been feeling so lonely for a while now. I don’t know any real life lesbians (aside from my mom’s friend) and I don’t know where to find them. I’m closeted to a lot of people (which probably doesn’t help my case lol) because I’m just so terrified of what is out there at the other side of the closet door. I have no guide or role model to show me that it’s okay to be me where I live or to show me where there are people like me. I know you talk about women’s festivals and stuff, but as far as I know, they don’t do that where I’m from (I’m from a little island in the Caribbean). And I’m just so jealous of all the lesbians out there who have friends and community. Sorry for the the little rant, I just don’t have many people to talk about this. But I’m gonna keep pushing through, I’m always searching. I know my people are out here somewhere. In the mean time, your blog and all the other lesbians on here have eased some of that loneliness, so thank you💙

Hello . It saddens me, but also gives me hope, when I hear younger people say that the only older lesbian they see or know who is visibly out and uses the word lesbian.

It makes my heart hurt because I know exactly that feeling of isolation, of not see a future being me because there was no one modelling it for me when I was growing up. At the same time, I have hope because over and over younger lesbians are letting it be known they are seeking lesbian community. Older lesbians are not insignificant, you want to hear our stories. Many older lesbians don't believe they are relevent so they just live a quiet life and figure they youngers are fine without them.

The fact is we can share stories and values of our experience and the younger lesbians can bring enthusiasm and excitment with their ideas and stories.

My suggestion is to talk with your mom's best friend. You don't both have to 100 percent agree on everything to gain some knowledge and information from each other. Many older lesbians get flustered because they fear being a lesbian is not enough anymore, that they will be expected to take on a new identity or use words that they are not connected to to talk about themselves. You can assure her this simply is not true. You can let her know you are just fine, even happy to meet a lesbian who is and uses lesbian. No other disclainers necessary. Fear of being irelevant or sadness at thinking "lesbian" is a thing of the past can cause women to become defensive.

Talk with her openly. Listen to what she has to say. Ask that she just avoid talking about the community and focus on her stories and in turn share with her your feelings. Keeping talking to intimate, individual tales of life and love and experience can benefit the both of you. No need for "others" whether that be the greater community or whats happening in today's world to be involved.

Definitley subscribe to Lesbian Connection. www.LConline.org. They have a PDF version and if you can't pay it is free. There are lots of great shared stories in there and ads for everything from lesbians books and movies to on line and in person gatherings.

Ask your mom's friend is she ever has her lesbian friends over for dinner, could you join. The thing to remember is if you wish her to listen to you, you must listen to her. Her life (off the internet most likey) is dractically different but by the simple fact that you are both lesbians living in this world, you share many things.

Keep looking, even on your small island there are bound to be lesbian meetups and gathering. Try the meet up app or even old fashioned FB. Check with your library about starting a Lesbian book club (unless they are so conservative it might be dangerous). Public libraries in America are almost always open to facilitate small gatherings

#intergenerational lesbians #older lesbians #younger lesbians #sharing stories

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septembersghost · 11 months

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you mentioned in a tag how fewer and fewer people who knew him are with us and I think about that too, plus some of the ones who've still been here suck, to say the least, and it's such a sad thing bc idk if the people on the business side care that much. then people hate Priscilla for being involved in the legacy work and they're going to hate Lisa's girls for not being involved in the legacy work. nobody wins.

i do contemplate this a lot, and of course anita's passing has brought this to the forefront of our minds again, and there's still that profound shock and grief from when lisa died. i was talking to a friend earlier about this too, and how lisa should've had so much more time, how she still had things to do and a life she wanted to live again (which is eerily similar to things her dad expressed before he passed as well, it feels cosmically unfair somehow). certain people have been here to run their mouths for decades and he didn't have the opportunity to share in his own words, but as we're losing the direct connections with loved ones, it's just…it has a particular sorrow to it, especially as the estate and graceland become more of that business model, that convention center remove, and less of the home it's always been. it would've been so, so different for the girls if their mom were still here, and i wish she was for every imaginable reason, but as far as graceland goes, they wouldn't have been looking at whether or not they wanted a role in that and what it might be until they were much older (and well into adulthood, in the twins' case).

it's heartbreaking, and of course there's no "winning" in this situation regardless (winning would be not losing him at 42, you know? it would be lisa and benjamin still here. it would be the girls getting to know him, he'd love them so very much), but yeah, there was a living link in lisa that's gone now, and whether or not any of the girls want to be involved closely in the estate/EPE is completely their choice, especially the twins because they have a lot of time before they're adults who even have to consider that. there has been such tragedy in their family and it's potentially a heavy burden that they're not obligated to carry - they should only be involved by their choice and if it makes them happy. priscilla has stated herself that part of why she feels compelled to still go out and give talks is to share her memories while she still can, and there's a poignancy in that. but thinking of graceland being more of a business...i know ultimately it has been that in many respects, along with being a place of pilgrimage to fans, but to lisa it was still home too. i have NOT read good things about joel (and the general tenor of everything at his hand), and i just hope at the end of the day, it remains cherished and its soul is kept intact, no matter who is or isn't running things.

all that said, again that's where his legacy falls to us too, which is why there's a particular beauty to the love we have and the insight we find with him, and what we keep and share with one another. the sense of community with fans matters, and is quite reflective of the bond elvis established with people then that has so brightly carried into the present. fans do a lot to carry that flame, even though many of us never got to even share the same time with him, and that's valuable and an essential reflection of him.

anyway, this:

#anonymous #letterbox #i was a dreamer

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kodachromantic · 1 year

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yo! lot's happened since i was last actively here. i turned 22 and graduated college!!!!!

i'm not doing much these days, as i'm waiting to find work once i move back up to where i used to live in august. new area but same general vicinity. so right now we're just going through the storage unit so that's ofc been taking up some time.

okay onto actually being here. i've been real down in the dumps about my art lately, feeling like i have no chance in the industry, leaving school with a portfolio i don't think will get me places. i kinda flip-flop on that when i actually look at my website, but i know there's so much more i can/have to do.

SO. i've decided instead of sitting on my ass and living in the sadness as i try to draw and have what i make leave me upset, i'm taking the step to do something about it! i'm gathering some resources and am just gonna start from the beginning with foundations.

i'm hoping to post my (almost) daily progress somewhere (as in here) just to have it out in the world and hold myself accountable somewhat. it's gonna suck, i know it will, but i have to remind myself that a bunch of terrible drawings will lead to something good.

i was watching a samdoesart video where he was talking about older creatives who're upset when they see these teen prodigies and he brought up a good point: those kids are likely spending every single day drawing for hours--they have more active art time under their belts. and looking at my k12 years and how focused i was on getting good grades, being president of clubs, and dealing with my own array of issues, i did leave art to the wayside at times. it got bad as i got older because more intensive work (honors/aps, yucky)--even during college i wouldnt draw much as I was modeling and 3D animating and all that!!

there's a lot of topics i wanna cover as an artist, which i know is frowned upon by some in the industry as you should have a designated, specified portfolio (for multiple reasons all of which make perfect sense), but i'll see what happens as i keep going through my learning.

anyway. i think im using this as an opportunity to not get started teehee SO LET'S GO

here's the spreadsheet i'm using to get a bunch of my resources from: marie lum (puccanoodles)'s resource sheet

right now i'm going to be using line-of-action and drawabox. i've literally taken anatomy and figure drawing classes before and i loved them but uugghh. they're saying drawabox is tough and i'm like sure, but it's free and you go at your own pace. idk, i guess i'll see what happens. LET'S ACTUALLY GO THIS TIME

#sami relearns art #yeah that works for now

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nimbus2224 · 2 years

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Bad Batch Season 2 Reaction *Spoilers*

Warning: This is the spoiler version of my reaction to the Bad Batch Season 2 trailer so if you have not watched it yet, I highly recommend you do so. I’ll be breaking down a really big (or at least big to me) reveal that occurred which I think you’ll probably want to see for yourself to get the full shock. :)

The non-super-spoiler/TLDR version is that I’m cautiously optimistic, somewhat terrified, and can’t spend time thinking about my favorite Star Wars character basically every day since I’ve watched this trailer. X_X I’m hopeful but also worried about what this story might be because of a particular, unexpected reveal.

Just to get this out of the way, I like the cinematography, the lighting, the animations, the character models...Just like in Clone Wars, the animation style really has come into its own over the years and this alone got me excited for this upcoming season. :) I actually like the new armor designs and coloration. It seems a bit haphazard but I suspect it may parallel a shift in perspectives for Bad Batch. I also like that Omega is getting older and seems a bit more capable in the trailer. I hope this means that she’ll be less likely to be constantly taken hostage like she was in the previous season. I would like to see her have more realistic responsibilities and behaviors not only as a member of the Bad Batch, but as a literal child who now has been exposed to her fair share of troubles.

I’m not saying she should be immediately traumatized or that the show should center around her grappling with mental issues that sprung up. Instead, I hope this season will explore her role not only in Bad Batch and as a clone, but function a little better at giving us an idea what being at war and hunted is like through her. How does she feel knowing that her family is quickly aging and will one day not be able to care for her? Will she ever become unwilling to participate in a mission when she finally realizes the danger? How will she help in her own way where it doesn’t feel like her life is being placed in direct danger? What are her feelings about what happened during the war before Order 66? How does she feel about regular clones and will she also accept them as her family?

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*Spoiler version*

Ok, so now that we’ve got the spoiler warning out of the way! Onto the reaction!

Like I said earlier, I’m both excited and terrified about what this next season might hold all because Commander Cody is featured in the trailer. I recognized him in the part of the video where he and Crosshair were walking around the hallway and then, yikes!, point their gun at what appears to be Omega and another young person. XC But it wasn’t until I saw him without the helmet that I was forced to say, “Yep, that was definitely Cody.” and that made me both really happy/excited and really sad.

Excited because this is literally my favorite Star Wars character (and one of my favorite characters EVER, if not top favorite) --- a character that I spent so many years enjoying drawing and writing about what I thought he was up to off screen in Revenge of the Sith, the EU books, and then Clone Wars. This is a character that I feel, in some way, positively guided me through my teen years and helped me heal from negative experiences.

Gut punch:

Seeing him again, and immediately thinking, “He’s going to be the bad guy, isn’t he. He’s going to get killed.” was a gut punch. :( This might sound stupid but even though I was bitter about Cody not getting many stories or screen time in Clone Wars, I held onto the fact that this meant that his character wasn’t in danger of being used as a complete opposing foil to Rex --- which is where I think a lot of viewers just organically gravitated anyways. Which is fine, there’s nothing wrong if you see Cody as Rex’s opposite/foil.

I’ve always viewed Cody as the precursor and forerunner to basically all clones (save for Alpha, who I believe may be the first named clone to ever exist in Star Wars --- which is extremely fitting considering at the end of Alpha’s introduction he specifically states going back to Kamino to teach other officers with the Jedi’s blessing to allow names instead of numbers). For me, Cody lays the groundwork for the type of struggles clones endure (finding identity, being their own type of leaders outside of the kind of ‘divine mandate’-ish way Force users look at it, not being super powered but existing in a super powered universe and surviving...) I much prefer the idea that Rex’s character arc in Clone Wars had him starting at much of the same place as Ahsoka (which is why he really rubbed me the wrong way) and then grow through his experience with being in bad/morally grey situations, learning humility and the value of being a servant leader, into someone who actually ended up more like Cody in the end (ironically). (I should make a blog post about those thoughts as well.)

Seeing him alongside Crosshair was alarming, unless they’ve somehow magically joined the rest of Bad Batch, which I doubt since they point their guns at what I think was Omega and someone else. :( So it feels like they’re setting him up to be a villain of some kind --- either crazy and brainwashed due to the inhibitor chip or, equally as bad, somehow completely drained of all humanity, intelligence, and empathy and now just a pawn of the Empire like Crosshair. And then he’s brandishing a knife defensively (RIP whoever he’s fighting, lol) and that’s never a good sign.

Yes, the creators own his story and can do whatever they like with it but I was really hoping that he could just “ride off into the sunset” and be forgotten by Disney. :L I didn’t want to see him and Rex fight because there’s only one way that would turn out: Rex, protected by eternal plot armor, would be the victor. I didn’t want him to reprise his role as the sacrificial clone whose only purpose was to die to preserve the same hero(es) (like Climber, Hardcase, Echo kinda, Waxer, Fives, etc.). I didn’t want to see him fight any heroes for that matter because that would mean that the Cody we see in the books and Clone Wars has crossed over a moral line that I believe defines who he is: Cody intrinsically values life (his orange-painted armor would signify as such according to Mandalorian color-meanings) and aware of right vs. wrong. For me, it would signify a failure for Cody to apply the same logic and empathy he displays throughout Clone Wars and the EU, and thus his character would essentially be dead.

Nimbus goes full-clown for a hot minute >_< :

This might be going ‘full clown’ here but I always (even before the inhibitor chips --- a concept I still dislike) saw Cody’s strange execution of Order 66 as him choosing the thousands of lives under his command over Kenobi’s. When I watch RoTS, I never saw him intending to kill Kenobi but rather to do a ‘fake out’ where really only he and the gunner would be responsible for the Jedi actually escaping --- Obi-Wan sadly believing that Cody had intentionally attacked. This would make sense to me as a carry through of the kind of person Cody is --- think the “I’ll do it myself’ scene from Cherynobl --- so that instead of an entire legion paying for a failure to kill Kenobi or protect against Kenobi’s attack, only he would be responsible. This is why I think, realistically, at the end of RoTS Cody would be almost immediately executed because his failure to make sure Kenobi was dead resulted in catastrophic damage to Vader, which Sidious was not pleased with at all.

Remember, Cody is a brilliant strategist who knows the rules, knows when to make the exception to those rules (i.e. not killing Slick on sight or shooting Kenobi himself), and is able to come up with a new plan on the spot. If he could tread the knife edge of this problem, then why wouldn’t he be able to think his way out of the Empire --- because he would immediately see that it’s values do not align with the people-centered values he upheld throughout the Clone Wars. A complete 180 from saying “Cities are just buildings, it’s the people who make them homes.”, reprimanding Boil for using derogative terms for Twi’leks, and clearly having a history with 99 and Bad Batch in season 2 would be so jarring/unfortunate. Ok, enough of this headcanon before this post turns into a full-on book. x_x

The dilemma and danger of being a side character:

I guess, where I’m going with this, is that I’m tired of Cody being tied to Rex and to Order 66 as those two things are the only things that define his character forever. It bothers me that, while doing so much good for the clones, Clone Wars ended up showing that it’s only the ‘special’, hand-picked clones like Wolffe, Bad Batch, and Rex who can be redeemed/saved or do anything meaningful --- who exist as individuals outside of which Jedi they were assigned and have backstories longer than a single paragraph (Gree, Cody, Bly, and so many other clones had such rich histories in the EU that are basically erased now).

Every time someone says Cody is “by the book” like it’s a condemnation (gonna write my own post about this because it deserves its own separate rant, lol) or that he wasn’t individualistic...it’s basically like saying all other clones not directly featured in Clone Wars or from the 501st were just meat-droids that mindlessly followed orders. As we see in Bad Batch, there’s so many reasons why each clone made the choices they did. I thought the Umbara arc did a great job reiterating the plethora of reasons clones have to follow orders, change their minds, and basically be believable characters in complex, morally grey situations.

It’s because of this characteristic that I’m not hopeful for how Cody will be portrayed in this new season of Bad Batch. Just reading some of the comments where people hoped that he would lose to Rex (and literally die) or stay with the Empire made me feel fearful for how this is going to play out. I don’t think the showrunners will forgo the popular “death battle” in exchange for a more thoughtful portrayal of a good person coming to terms with or explaining what happened during Order 66 and trying to escape. Again, this show and Clone Wars really does a number on the more grey or nuanced stories in favor of a pure black and white plotline. And that’s too bad.

Predictions/Hopes:

I would love to see Cody subtly trying to get his brothers out of the Empire or make a difference there, before escaping. Maybe my theory of the Empire killing off clones to quell possible rebellion, especially clones like Cody who are known to have failed to kill their Generals during the Jedi Purge, causes Cody to gather clones to escape. Maybe he learns about the Dark Trooper project. *shudder*

I would love to see him and Rex work together, now no longer under any ranks or being commanded by Jedi but instead by themselves. They can talk for as long as they like now, talk about their pasts (would love to hear stories about Cody and Alpha training Rex), mourn those that passed with Cody. Cody divulging that it’s possible Obi-Wan survived. I would love to know that he was one of the clones that was able to go on to live a civilian life, passing on what he had learned throughout his life to others.

I would love to have Omega and Cody interact positively in some way, maybe he tells her a story or teaches her something useful (like hand to hand combat or a trick to strategizing/anticipating enemy movements). It would be a terrible waste, I think, to have the literal first named clone in Star Wars (second if you’re counting Alpha from the EU) --- someone who literally helped lead the way for other clones, like Rex and Gree, to be allowed to show their individuality --- not to have some moment with Omega related to that aspect of his character. I would love for Cody to, for once, be able get a chance to tell his story and do more than just be support for Rex or whatever Jedi of the week was there (sorry, getting bitter about this all over again X’C).

And I’m not asking for the show to be about him, because that won’t happen. I just want him to be treated well instead of being morphed into a flat plotpoint for another character to bounce off of instead of dance with. Even if that other character is Crosshair or Gregor (maybe he can help sway Crosshair). Especially in a show about clone troopers, it could show how each clone important and a dying culture in the Star Wars universe with valuable knowledge, past experiences, and individuality that’s not categorical by which side of the Force they’re on. Regarding the desire of many fans for Cody to oppose Rex and the others, I’d argue that it’s actually less cliche for an intelligent, thoughtful character to seek to make amends and repair the damage he unknowingly caused due to the inhibitor chip.

It’s not cliche for a character who has a track record of valuing life, selflessness, wanting to raise his brothers out of ‘facelessness’ to live as people instead of meat droids, and knowing evil when he sees it, to buck the Empire and what it made him become. It’s not cliche to show the value of different types of people rebelling in different types of ways. One doesn’t have to be sassy, aggressively confident, or so powerful the plot orbits them to be a good person or rebel against oppression in a unique and thoughtful way. I just want a good story, even if it’s bittersweet (which is basically a given), which a plot and motivations that make sense.

Whatever happens, all I can say is that I will have to bring a box of tissues with me because there is no way I’m making it through any episode of this show without crying. TuT

Thanks for making it to the end! :) Hopefully I didn’t annoy anyone with my rant. Sometimes, I feel like I don’t speak up for my favorite characters enough and just gush out with all my thoughts. I don’t expect it to change anyone’s opinion, least of all a showrunners, but just wanted to share my ideas about this lovely character. What are your thoughts? Are you excited for the next season? Do you think Cody deserves a good ending or should he continue at the same level he’s at? What do you think a conversation between Cody, Hunter, Omega, or Rex would go like?

Lastly, whatever you’re going through right now, directly or indirectly, I hope you’re doing well and that there’s a brighter tomorrow for you. <3

#bad batch season 2 #commander cody #clone trooper #captain rex #omega #nimbus2224 reacts #fan theory #headcanon #star wars #clone wars #star wars empire

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