#bit of oversharing lmao rip

[worstlovesong]

“There’s just bad vibes in this body dude” - me to my therapist

#she took that in stride 😭 #apparently I am very clearly on my way to a shutdown lmao #to the point where she was like ‘let’s pause trauma therapy until you’re a bit more stable’ 💀💀💀 #rip me I guess #cj.txt #i love oversharing on the internet

[monstaxdirtywonk]

SKZ’s Ideal Types based in astrology

Hey everyone! Today I will talk about some indicators on their birth charts about what they like in a partner. I will use their Juno sign, which suggests the ideal long term/spouse qualities (no matter the gender) and Mars/Venus signs which depend on someone’s sexuality. For instance if someone is attracted to women, they should take a look at their Venus sign and if to men, their Mars one. But I wanna give an overall picture and not rely so much on genders because I know some people are nb. There are other placements that can be used for that (I’ve heard of the 7th house i think), but since we know only Chan’s birth time, we can’t find the other’s. I’m always on the hunt for their rising signs lmao, so if you know a member mentioned theirs, feel free to tell me in the comments. Enjoy!

Bang Chan- Juno in Virgo, Venus in Scorpio, Mars in Sagittarius

Let’s start with the Juno

Someone organized, put together and reliable 

Mature and helpful

Caring and loyal

but the venus in scorpio suggests someone more intense than the typical virgo profile would be 

to match his emotional intensity 

someone that looks mysterious, and doesn’t overshare

i guess since he is a extroverted guy that overshares lmao, he’d be attracted to someone that’s an enigma to him

i can see why he finds black such a sexy color lmao

yes stereotypical but probably more sexy than cute

his mars now, someone very funny and extroverted

someone that encourages him to stop overthinking and just be in the moment for once

more casual and relaxed styles for men

i guess this also fits his personal fashion sense too

Minho- Juno in Scorpio, Venus in Scorpio, Mars in Virgo

Omg Minho loves pain rip lmao

I think that Minho appreciates maturity a lot in a partner and although as i’ve stated before, i think he likes someone more ‘lightweight’ and playful than himself

behind this facade, he craves someone emotionally mature to match up his energy 

i think regarding his venus (if we had the house we’d have more details rip), he would like someone more classy sexy than in Chan’s case

someone that is in the middle, not exactly an enigma because it might frustrate him, but not an open book either

someone witty that understands his sarcasm and shoots back

he likes being entertained by big brains lmao

and i want people to understand that we scorpio’s have big brains too

not only big dicks

i might be feeding minsung shippers here but it’s gonna happen anyways

i think he likes a more classy style for men

and someone that is a bit more practical than him 

to balance him out

Changbin- Juno in Scorpio, Venus in Virgo, Mars in Scorpio

I think regarding women his type and Chan’s are kinda similar

although i can see changbin liking a cute look that makes him soft no matter the gender 

now i feed changlix shippers too

it’s extremely important for him to know his s/o is loyal

probably 2 out of his 3 big placements are in Leo and they do love your constant attention lmao

so he’d like someone to be very atttentive and scorpio lovers are all over you lmao

it might be too much for some but his chart along with the fact that he is very extroverted and likes to be around people pretty much all the time (seriously his social battery is broken lmao) makes him perfect for that

but behind his dark persona (once you get to know him you laugh at that because he can easily be the maknae lmao) he really likes some cuteness

someone doll-ish and delicate

for men, i can see more stereotypically masculine looks

and darker colors and stuff

it’s an interesting observation, their mars sign matches their style lmao 

Hyunjin- Aquarius Juno, Venus in Pisces, Mars in Aries

okay so juno changed only twice for 2000 and all of the 2000 line has the same in aquarius. 

but i think it is particularly accurate in hyunjin’s case and i will tell you why

although pisces and aquarius are rather different, they do have a common trait which is their artistic nature and I can see him being into someone that has an ‘eye’ for art, even if they themselves aren’t necessarily artists.

i can also see him finding some indepencence attractive, especially since he is an introvert that wants some alone time

but he also wants the romance when you are together

the intimacy and being close

he really likes a sweet youthful look (for women mostly)

and someone more softspoken

while for his mars, someone confident

fun loving and adventurous

with an edgy style, maybe even tattoos

The Virgo triplets- Aquarius Juno, Venus in Libra, Mars in Leo (and for Seungmin Mars in Virgo)

I really wish i had their birth times to tell more differences between their charts, Venus and Mars move slowly that’s why they have the same placements (almost)

because their houses are different but we can’t know them without their birth time 

anyways, venus in libra

someone conventionally good looking

more pretty looking than sexy

elegant too, FOR SURE

someone that wants to carry themselves and kind, with manners

for men, mars in leo, someone assertive, dominant and confident 

i mean felix said it himself that changbin is his ideal type for men and who can blame him lmao

for seungmin, his mars is in virgo and honestly i can see that

i think seungmin is the most likely out of all of them to like someone that is similar to him

Jeongin- Pisces Juno, Venus in Aries, Mars in Scorpio

So interesting

It’s possible that Jeongin has a secret soft side that he shows to his s/o only but he wants a s/o to be very romantic and dreamy to inspire this feeling in him

for his venus, someone sexier and more edgy rather than cute

to make him more out there than he is, to encourage him to be more adventurous

now his mars is where i’m gonna disagree lmao

i don’t think jeongin particularly likes heavy scorpio energy (rip to us)

i can’t see him enjoying all this intensity, his approach to love is a bit more fire sign culture if that makes sense (maybe not leo)

more friendly, playful, fun etc.

(for astrology ships DM me 5 usd)

#skz #stray kids #stray kids astrology #skz astrology #chan #changbin #minho #hyunjin #felix #seungmin #jisung #jeongin

[hexfane]

oh shit i forgot tumblr is the PLACE to BE for oversharing. if you see this but dont care no you dont

absolutely insane rabid chomping at the bit madness in part because *hypo*manic episode and in part because genuine life changes nd trying to unlearn bad habits :~[

i am so fucking sick of holding myself back but i am such a dumb kicked puppy for no reason

i eternally am waiting for the shoe to drop. it always feels like im one second away from getting my heart ripped out of my chest and every day i feel so much shame when i Literally Didnt Do Anything. believe me if i had anything to actually gaf about i wouldn't be willingly expressing shit. but im always like Theyre Going To Get Me. who queen!! or Theyre Going To Find Out. find out what queen!!

why am i ashamed of being happy. why am i ashamed of being myself and doing things i enjoy.

why do i have fucking catholic guilt when i wasnt even raised religious lmao

and especially with big ol neon letters why am i ashamed of the fact i want to be known and cared about? ive internalized the fact im undeserving of care and that im doomed to never have it i dont even start and any attempts to even find piece in the segments of reality i set aside for myself makes me feel like im fucking evil. i get so mad at myself for expressing genuine emotion like actually fucking angry like im doing something wrong and people are going to hate me.

i also have a nebulous counter in my head that decides when i have been Too Free and that Now Everyone Will Hate You. Why Did You Do That? You Have Fucked Up. and i only know when i reach that point after ive done it, and it can be triggered by something as simple as liking a post or literally done absolutely nothing

just kidding i know why! it is the neurodivergence. i feel like the way my brain works makes me exist in a manner inherently incongruent from other people and that i am like a fucking creep for even trying to relate to other people, like i am a subhuman for the way i think and feel and live

i left my job recently bc of dumb petty teenage drama that made me have a massive meltdown at my Grown Ass Age and i think that also really fucked my shit up even further because im like borderline agoraphobic about talking to other people now? or being in situations socially that arent fully normalized to me? like im pushing through it and doing New Things TM but it is pretty taxing mentally and i think im on the butt end of that where now im just kinda empty feeling

also if you read this and are psychoanalyzing me yes i already know i suffer from paranoia/delusion issues and thats a big part of my shit ik. i dont do anything to exacerbate any kind of psychosis because for as much as i meme about it i am a pretty fucking conservative smoker and drinker. i eat my wheaties and shit, body has no reason to make me so crazy, and yet.

just know if i ever talk to you or interact with you in any way i have already accepted the fact that me doing that will make you think less of me just by default and fussed over it internally already before making the decision.

did you enjoy the spectacle, if u got down here? dw i dont mean that in a mean accusatory way i like reading these too, i'm nosey. thanks for listening

[normal-thoughts-official]

I always wondered why is Alec always the one to make the first move? And why magnus is suprised by that? Is he waiting for Alec to reach out first?

imo? yes. or rather he's not waiting because he kinda doesn't expect displays of affection. but yes i do think magnus is holding himself back

there are many reasons i believe that. first one, magnus canonically thinks that he's too much to handle, he's said so himself, both as a joke and in seriousness when he told alec that he knows he's a lot to deal with. second one, alec was in the closet five seconds ago and he is a shadowhunter, which makes magnus second-guess himself regarding touch and PDA because it feels like it's not going to be welcomed. this reason has two subsections as well: one, we know that magnus pretty much never touches people without permission and hates being touched without permission (think the way he wouldn't even touch alec's lips when he was flirting with him and how he never ever touched alec or even flirted with him with others around once he witnessed the demon fiasco, as well as the way he glared at jace when jace touched his shoulder). two, magnus has good reason to be wary of getting close to shadowhunters. those are the people who kill his people. and even though he knows alec is not going to like, try to murder him for no reason, it's still hard to ignore all that trauma and not fear initiating contact in that way, you know, especially when you know in shadowhunter culture they aren't very big on touch.

third reason, which i think is the most important one: magnus has been abused

both by his father and camille, so at least twice, and that's a very powerful thing. i have no doubt in my mind that camille's abuse rethoric in particular was very focused on him being needy (think her telling him that he doesn't do well losing those he loves, think her telling him that he would choose her because she could be with him forever. a lot of her rethoric relies on the idea that magnus needs her because he's too demanding and she's the only one that can give him what he needs, for one reason or another. and while she at the time was using it mostly to convince him to stay with her/take her side, abusers usually use their rethoric both to prove to make you stay and put you down. in my experience, abusers often paint their partners as needy, both to say "no one else would put up with you" and "i don't even know why i put up with you". only they will love you, but also, you are never fully deserving of their love, it's never enough, and you need to do better) and so planting this idea that he needed too much, asked for too much, was a lot to deal with. and - albeit in a different way, especially due to the different nature of that relationship - asmodeus wasn't much different. who else would love magnus, with his demonic eyes? anyone else would call him a monster and want nothing to do with him. he needs asmodeus, so he better be grateful for whatever asmodeus throws at him

that's another important point: abusers teach you that wanting anything at all out of a relationship is bad. either because it will be met with violence or because it proves that you are selfish, demanding, insecure, dependent, self absorbed, disrespectful, childish... take your pick. the reasons/rethoric vary, but the point they drive towards is always the same. that's what characterizes abuse: making you put aside your own needs/wants in the name of the other person's

so i think in general magnus was just kind of untaught to ask for what he wants or initiate that for himself. it's a trope we've seen many times in the show. when magnus is sad, he hides away. when he has a problem, he tries to deal with it on his own. he never asks for help, not once. he never initiates contact. he never admits he needs help. he never even asks for company. and he consistently puts other people's needs before his own, sacrificing himself way more than would ever be healthy, etc etc etc

and we gotta remember this is magnus' first serious relationship after he broke up with camille. he had been very deliberately avoiding opening his heart to anyone else, he said so himself. and seeing him with alec, it's pretty clear why. like, don't get me wrong, i think he's ready for a relationship, and you can't really start to learn to build better relationships post-abuse without having some problems and false starts and that's okay. but like you can see the way that he is always putting alec's needs before his own, assuming that that's how it would be, not expecting it in return - remember his genuine shock when alec came to rescue him in hell? after magnus had gone to hell for him and his family without thinking twice so many times? like bro... - being afraid of telling him about his history and even who his father was, canonically because he was scared alec would think less of him

it's pretty clear to me that magnus has that feeling in the back of his mind that he's going to get to be too much and at the same time he's not really enough. i also think he's a little scared of giving him weapons to use against him - like letting him know of asmodeus or his past. like, of course he is scared of being judged for the obvious reasons, but if you tell me that camille never used that against him... i have to laugh. and of course magnus knows that alec is not camille, but this isn't really about alec, it's about what camille has taught him, because one thing about abuse that i think people who haven't been abused downplay the importance of is that abusers make you think that abuse is normal. and it takes years of building better relationships to unlearn certain things. after i broke up with my first abuser, i was genuinely shocked every time my partners realized i was in pain without me having to say anything or ask them to stop. and i know they weren't anything like my first abuser who either didn't care or was too self absorbed to notice. but my experience with my abuser made me think that my partners not realizing or not caring that they hurt me was normal, when it obviously wasn't. and it's not that different with magnus and alec. magnus knows alec isn't camille. magnus knows alec wouldn't use his past abuse history against him. magnus knows alec isn't just playing with his feelings. but that doesn't matter, because his mind is just set to believe that he needs to hide his feelings, be afraid of vulnerability, and never, ever ask for anything if he can avoid it

so yeah that's why i think magnus doesn't go for kisses and love declarations or anything of the sort. it's not that he doesn't want it or feel it, cuz we know he does, but i think he feels like he's imposing on alec, that he's gonna scare him off, that he's too much, that he's just setting himself up for disappointment when alec inevitably doesn't feel for magnus as strongly as magnus does, etc etc. there are like, so many elements, honestly

i think he's learning and growing tho! i mean he has been for a long while, of course, it's why he was ready to start a new relationship in the first place. but like by the end of the seasons we got to be magnus being genuinely surprised that alec would dump him just like that, initiating more kisses, proposing (granted he already knew alec was gonna do it, but still), and even breaking down in front of him, although it wasn't really by choice djahdsah

but like either way i think he's slowly realizing that everything he's come to think of as just facts (like him being unlovable or too much or whatever) were really not. and i'd like to see him growing more confident in that sense, although i just love and am so glad that he gets to be with someone who feels just as intensely as him and isn't afraid to express it at all and who just... is right with him at every step, you know? i just really love that about them, even if obviously magnus needs to learn to express himself and be as emotionally open with alec as alec is with him

#sh #malec #magnus bane #meta #magnus bane meta #abuse tw #bit of oversharing lmao rip #shadowhunters #ask #anonymous #long post #anti fanon alec #not directly but u know #camille belcourt is an abuser #camille's trash party

[horanghoe]

venting. but with ✨memes✨

this is me using Tumblr as a diary. I am ranting. feel free to oogey boogey wiggely woogely your way past another human moaning into the void about arbitrary things, like a ghost inside a forgotten train.

- love your friendly spooky queen, liv

so I kinda fucking hate people

lmaoooo

I figure that's a great way to start a rant piece right?

it's a non-descript annoyance I've been feeling towards the world in general for a while now, and it has no start or predictable endpoint.

I know a lot of people can relate to that statement on a base level

and I also know there are tons of quotes out there about not letting life jade you

but honestly, I'm so tired. and I am so jaded that it's often hard to look over the rim of the aforementioned metaphorical glasses without becoming exhausted via the stretch to not see ✨the shit✨

notes etc:

/ I am not depressed or at harm in any way / I do not intend to harm myself or others / I am happy, healthy, wealthy and well-fed / I am aware of my priviledges (maybe too aware?) / and am simply using my right as a human on the mortal coil to whine for a little bit

okay onto my second point

being neurodivergent is really tiring

like I'm really exhausted

mentally and often physically

like I know I keep saying it & crying wolf

but truly it is exhausting to live this way

I literally cannot express this enough

my diagnosis is coming up on the first of April and while getting a diagnosis in the first place is a privilege;

I am really really really tired of my friends eliminating my anxieties by surrounding the whole thing with often a simple ~

'oh well, it's good that you have an appointment!'

I never said I wasn't happy about it

I never said it wasn't a good thing

I never at one point refused to acknowledge my privilege of actually receiving help

~ I NEVER SAID RECEIVING A DIAGNOSIS WAS A NEGATIVE THING ~

I am simply 20 years of tired self-managing screwed up in a tightly layered rubber band ball and if someone misinterprets my symptoms or behaviour, my whole journey to diagnosis would have been for nought

also, the number of people dismissing my genuine pain with a half-hearted comment of:

omg! I've felt that way too - maybe I have it!

isn't everyone [insert symptom here] at some point?

hasn't everyone [insert symptom here] at some point?

I also procrastinate! omg, I can't sleep too!

that one really gets to me

like, it gets me down a lot

my friend, you have never felt the pain of unstoppable thoughts ripping through you at night like an unidentifiable tsunami washing over a town like a smite from God

I don't know lmao

I just wish people gave more time to others

gonna specifically call out bee and sammy on tumblr at least for being great long standing internet models - who are kind and considerate, aren't immature and appreciate a discussion, not a dismissal

the obvious complimentary disclaimer off the back of that is that nobody else is on a lower level in my eyes via that statement

simply those are the two internet friends I consider mmm

in relation to today's Tumblr diary entry

continuing on from that

I wish I wasn't the way that I am, periodt

I don't mean that in an existential sense like I'm pretty fine in modern standards, I have health and decent morals etc, I just mean it in a very simple sense

I fucking wish I didn't have a brain wired this way? like pls

I rly hate when I overshare. often I'm more uncomfortable than you and have already cringed at what I'm saying before you know what I'm talking about

having ADHD is exhausting

I really am: friendly, outgoing, I think pretty damn funny at times, generally light-hearted, open and easy-going

but the aspects from my ADHD are what upset me, as I start to consider how to deal with them in adulthood

people around me in real life - often old friends or colleagues - have started complimenting 'how less aggressive, assertive and loud' I am

I'm so, so happy that you exist more comfortably around me *sarcasm alert*

but me being quiet shouldn't allow for people to be rude

and from what I see pretty much everywhere, online and in IRL discussions, most neurodivergent people experience the same thing when being diagnosed late or in adulthood, and experience the same kind of grief from it

so the silver lining is that - ✨fuck the silver lining✨

I am allowing myself the space to be annoyed and to be upset

and I refute myself the apology of being loud

I enjoy existing and will continue to do so with love

a whole lot of peace and patience for the ignorant

but also a condition of varied energy patterns

intrusive thoughts, moods and behaviours

and being loud

(I am proud to say I exist)

(even if it means your discomfort of the unconventional is exposed for the world to see via my presence)

ignorance is not bliss and it never will be, imo

~~~~~~~

some Reddit memes for reference and giggles cause life is short, have fun:

(special shout out to my friends who have genuinely taken note of my memory issues - you guys make me not want to Kermit on a daily basis - and also my god-given mother who has to tell me every time I get gas NOT to get the shiny diesel labelled one. I am not a child who doesn't pay attention. I cannot remember instructions. and it is isolating and terrifying sometimes)

okay, last one kids, I know this post has been long ~

saved the best for last hehe <3 aren't I such a tease

peace and love & eat the rich

- love liv 🐸💌

#just me spit-balling on the pain of being beside-average #neither above or below #but kinda on the side #just happy to be here #and that social media allows people on the side to co-exist #livs soft hours ♡ #feel free to skip #mutuals if you have any thoughts and would like to re-affirm that im not a totally annoying person that would be #well it would be very nice and appreciated #but dont be bias now hehe #okay bye <3

[alkalinefrog]

I always imagined Matsuda and Light with a good friendship, they are not best friends with each other, but they trust each other a little. Could you do a headcannom on that ?? I don’t know, they’re going out and talking about people they like romantically speaking, but in a way that didn’t reveal their sexuality, like for example Light talks about L, but talks about L as if he were a girl, he’s still a sensitive subject for both (bisexual or pansexual Matsuda is something that I think is very true)

Pan Matsuda!! High five!! YES I absolutely agree they’d have a great friendship! One of the things that made the ending so heartbreaking was the absolute betrayal Matsuda felt when Light was revealed to be Kira. I love that he was super fond of Light, almost like he viewed him like a younger brother! Him crying while he had to shoot him wrecked me bruh. Light I think also enjoyed his company in a bemused sort of way, and they have a really fun dynamic! I can see Light having some genuine affection for him too.

They’d be great bar buddies LOL I don’t think Light would mention any feelings towards L out loud when stone cold sober 😂😂😂

Idk what the events leading up to it would be, but I could see them a couple drinks in at the bar, and Matsuda’s waaaaayyyyy oversharing. He’s talking about his (non-existent) love-life all good natured at first, but then slips up and uses he/they instead of she/her and goes “OH SHIT, I MEAN” and digs himself into a massive hole. Light’s watching all of it go down thinking “that’s embarrassing lol relatable--- wait what.” He zones out for a bit, reflecting on his repressed feelings and L comes up in his mind more times than he was expecting so he’s like “AW HELL NO.” He forces himself out of his thoughts back into the present, and at this point Matsuda’s actually crying and sloppily comes out to him.

People are starting to stare. Light’s like “oh god I didn’t sign up for this” and like pats Matsuda awkwardly on the back LMAO. He tries to calm him down, talking about his past girlfriends to relate, but L pops into his mind again and he ALSO SLIPS UP. He’s like “ah shit,” and freezes for a sec. He checks to see what Matsuda’s reaction is, but it’s chill, he’s still sobbing a puddle onto the table top 😂😂😂

They get kicked out and Light drags Matsuda home while desperately trying not to think about how he definitely does not have feelings for L, no siree, not this boy! (rip)

#Anonymous #head canons #light yagami #matsuda touta #i love matsuda a lot #also lowkey slowly settling on L being bi in my mind side note #ask

[calciferstims]

ironic i was just about to also ask about what your phobias are and yea BRUUUHHH!! tell me about it!!! i seen videos with like the title something that goes worms in your brains and im like STOP! ✋ aint no fucking way i am clicking that!

LITERALLY like. The show monsters inside me???? HELLO??? WHO WATCHES THAT AS A FUN TIME I WOULD CRY

Sometimes I watch Divergent and I get to the fear tests part and I think about how my fear wouldn’t be some psychological shit it would be PARASITES. I would DIE I would have a heart attack and die before I even got a chance to be kicked out of dauntless ✋

Big part of it for me was the movie The Mummy 😔😔 I was showed it too young and the scarabs absolutely ruined me 😔😔 also pretty sure I caught that one bit of Star Trek with the fuckin. Bugs that go in peoples ears. Hate that. ALSO THE LIL BASTARD IN THE MATRIX-

Just rambling bc u asked my phobias but 👀 I think I have a really specific thing too that’s not necessarily like. Actual parasites and stuff but APPARENTLY I have an issue with ANYTHING living going into ears or mouths or any shit like that FUCK no. Pretty sure it originated from a scene with that squid-face dude from Pirates of the Caribbean??? I was young and he put his tentacles all up in some dudes ears and it grossed me out so much ✋ and that is why I literally had to exit the theater while watching Rouge One😔 way better ab it now tho!!! Still hate it 😐

Even more oversharing upcoming sorry but one day I actually woke up with a lil bug having crawled in my ear and I freaked the fuck out 😶 got it out no problem and was like ‘yeah yeah I’m good this will not affect me at all’ except it actually affected my sleep haha now I have an even MORE personal phobia of bugs in my ears RIP to me ig 😐

Sorry you did not ask for this information just. I have never explained it to anyone lmao

#the bug thing was probably the first fear I’ve ever had that actually interrupted my life lmao #that was a good while ago and now it still freaks me out thinking about it #i have trouble sleeping sometimes if I feel any tickle in my ear bc I will literally shoot up and claw at my ear in a panic 😐 #even now it still makes my heart pound sometimes #fun times 🥰 #ask box #oversharing time besties #tw bugs mention #tw trypophobia mention #tw parasites mention

[ggukseoulcafe]

Can I ask about the Still With You au and the drabble you have planned to go with it?? 👀 All your wips look like they're going to either rip me apart or make me faint tbh haha I love it!!

hiii 💌 and omg rip you apart?? i'd be honoured if they had that kinda effect on someone lmaooo

also, still with you is my personal favourite from my list of wips sooooo i might overshare here (i can't control myself) 👀 anyway here we go

still with you au: its about the oc getting caught in an unexpected(?) situation when she returns back home with jungkook (who obv plays some role major role in her life) and there's best boy namjoon and the three of them get caught in a crossfire (or more like a tense fire) due to their families

here's a little sneak peek of a scene i had so much fun writing-

As you stand in front of the mirror, trying to get rid of your earrings which are a bit too heavy for your liking, Jungkook comes to stand right behind you. When you look up, your eyes meet his in the mirror and you're surprised to see him stand so close.

And then, he's staring at you like that. Like he has so much to say, so much to ask but settles for just looking at you with that look in his eyes. You can see he's slightly frustrated.

as for the drabble....i can't find anything in there which is not straight filth lmao so im putting a little excerpt below the cut 👀 (minors do not continue)

Adding just a little pressure, he raises a dark eyebrow, "Open."

Immediately, you obey.

Opening your mouth as you stare at him in need, completely at his mercy.

Seeing you be so good for him gets him going. He feels its only fair that he rewards you for being so perfect for him.

He rolls his tongue around, only to spit a generous amount straight into your open mouth.

"Swallow, baby."

#parkdatjimin #rei answers #jungkook x reader #jungkook smut

[soundofseventeen]

Take This To Heart (Choi Seungcheol)

In honor of our leader coming back soon, I thought I’d give you this. It is my favorite song by my favorite band (lmao, someone please ask why it means so much to me, i wanna overshare) and I wrote about my favorite boy no one tell Joshua. I’ll probably come back in the morning to finish everything I neglected last week.

Word count: 3184

Even in his daze, Seungcheol managed to get everything packed up and ready to go home early the next morning despite it being so late at night. The journey from Manila back to Korea had been nothing less than tiring and he had the strength to get home but his priorities laid with his bandmates. Ode To You was finally over and even though he missed most of it, he still felt tired, the physical ache still deep in his bones, and mental fatigue still looming in the backburner of his brain. The time off did him well, but he couldn’t help but help feel somewhat guilty for not being there where he was needed. 

Luckily, he had managed to convince you to let him finish this tour with them. As Seventeen’s general leader and oldest brother, Seungcheol felt the sense of duty of being there with them even if he wasn’t onstage and he was forever indebted to you for understanding. He wondered what would’ve happened to him if you told him to stay behind. And then he figured that his restlessness and remorse for missing out would’ve eventually led him back to them although that would’ve also meant more arguments and snide remarks and that wouldn’t have gone well with either of you. 

Everyone else was either fast asleep or getting there and he smiled, especially when his eyes found Jeonghan. No doubt, he was tired of being the leader even though he had been a spectacular one. Joshua too when Jeonghan stepped down for a month to take care of his own health. The title wasn’t an easy one to carry but he didn’t want anyone else to have that burden (even though it was also his pride), but now it was time to go back to being Seventeen and Carats’ leader. He rather would’ve missed a tour than a whole comeback and then some.

Seungcheol peeked through the hotel’s curtains, the streetlights and passing cars illuminating his face. Leaving you wasn’t easy either. Truth be told, he had almost fallen apart after they had left for OTY. You’d barely moved into your first house together and he suddenly felt like he was being ripped away from you. Well, the Asian leg of the tour was easy...until Mingyu spilled the beans that he had to go on hiatus. But it was in the past. 

“One more night,” he murmured to himself, not caring if one of them heard him. This time tomorrow, he’d be spinning you around the room while all the songs he’s ever dedicated to you sounded all over the place because every song would be yours. He just hoped you’d wait a little longer. He swore you’d make it. 

*

Actually, when Seungcheol announced that they were hitting the road to tour, you had been in your room folding the week long-neglected laundry in the basket. Tired as he was, he burst through the door, excited.

“Jagi, we’re doing it again!” He only felt a little bad when he saw you jump. “Ode to you is officially starting….soon. Jagi?”

“I can’t exactly jump for joy when I’m carrying all these clothes,” you joked.

“Oh right!” He took about half of the shirts already on their hangers to ease your load and helped you place them in the closet, all color coordinated and all facing the same direction.

“Okay, now that’s done, what’s this I hear about a tour?” You eyed him skeptically as he collapsed on your bed, his arm shielding him from the light and you swore he would’ve passed out from the exhaustion if you didn’t talk to him.

“Yeah, our boss just announced it today.” He now sounded casual as he mentioned it but you noticed the hint of frustration. “We leave in two weeks. We start in Asia, then we go to North America and, back to Asia and then we end it in Europe.”

“Can you handle that?” You asked as you sat at the foot of the bed. You removed his shoes slowly, opting to massage his feet. You decided to stay quiet when you could feel the throbbing through his socks, and just shook your head.

“Me? I’ll be fine. It’s the other boys I’m worried about. Beomju hyung and I just got Jihoon to go home finally if Soonyoung keeps at it with the choreos, he might have to sit out the first few shows to regain his energy. I think I should tell the big man who signs our checks to wait some more. We just got this place and-”

“Cheol, I’d rather you argue about going on tour so soon. You haven’t even dropped An Ode yet.”

“Jagi, come here.” He waited to open his eyes until he could feel you close to him. He rolled over to face you and reached for  your hand. “I know you don’t like a lot of this, and I don’t either but think of the Carats. That’s why we do this.”

“But you know they’d rather you stay here and take a break. And I don’t want you to leave either. I feel like we just got the hang of this.” Your eyes fluttered shut when he traced the details of your face. “This house already feels empty with you gone most of the time.”

“We’ll make it,” he assured you. “Just let me know you’ll be here while I am gone.”

*

“I’m coming home tonight, my love,” Seungcheol told you over the phone at the crack of dawn. Despite being back in Korea, it felt like you two were still worlds apart. He still couldn’t believe that his boss had decided for Seventeen to come back to Seoul by train then by boat and then by train again back to the home country in an attempt to reimburse the money lost in the European tour. They had stopped near the South Korean border at around three am because they just wanted to rest and the sea breeze just him wanna run to you. 

“Good,” he heard you sniffle. “I missed you so much. It’s been so hard without you.”

“I know, just wait a little longer. We’re now in the same country. I’m almost there.”

“Cheol, did you even sleep?”

“No,” he admitted after a while. “I’ve been up since yesterday. I just wanna get home already. I want to be with you and see you.”

“I need you to sleep. You’re in for a long day and by the time you get to the train station, you won’t be able to stand. Baby, I’ve missed you a lot and I’ve been worried that you haven’t been taking care of yourself.”

“I will. Just let me come home first.” He once again cursed his boss for giving them the latest times to leave from everywhere. “Take this to heart. Nothing will keep me from seeing you tonight.”

*

“Do you guys have everything?” you asked the 13 sleepy boys. Half of them were glaring blearily at the Incheon Airport’s floors and the other half were falling asleep on their feet, but you nodded in satisfaction when they held up their passports. “Okay, let me know when you guys land or get to the airport or whatever. And please drink responsibly. If you wake me up because you want me to see who’ll fly first again, you will find me in front of your hotel room and it won’t be pretty.”

“You’re no fun,” Soonyoung whined. “SCoups hyung already looks after us. We don’t need another parent.”

“You’ve been warned.” You waited until each of them gave you a hug so you could leave. “Have fun guys. I miss you already.”

“Jagi wait. You didn’t kiss me yet.” Seungcheol puckered his lips, which left you no choice but to kiss him...so you did.

“I love you,” you told him quietly.

“Wait! I need 12 more.”

“Why?”

“One for luck at every show we play.”

“Did you really count that?”

“I did and I’m not boarding until you kiss me.”

“Stay safe,” you whispered once you complied with his request. He leaned his forehead to yours to try to keep the moment private.

“Stay strong. Will you be here for me while I’m gone?”

*

“Hyung,” Chan said, bringing Seungcheol out of his thoughts. “The whole world knows you’d rather be home right now, but rushing us out of the hotel won’t get us to Seoul faster. We have plenty of time to check out-”

“Don’t remind me,” he groaned.

“I’m just saying that we will leave eventually, but for right now, come have lunch with us. Or at least sleep. You’ll kill time a little faster….”

In the background, he could hear Soonyoung and Minghao arguing over a phone charger and then Wonwoo piped in about having an extra one to use and that ended the little skirmish. Then the door closed and he wondered if Seungkwan went for more ice. He could taste the morning breath in his mouth and he made a face. He could see Junhui coming in the room and throwing his suitcase on the bed to pull something out. He could smell someone spraying their cologne. He could feel the towel he was currently wringing in his hands. His senses had been elevated and he knew Chan was still talking, still trying to relax a little, but he couldn’t hear him...or focus on him for that matter. Seungcheol knew he needed to keep his head a little longer. He could already feel you in his arms and promising to stay with you as long as he possibly could.

“Hyung?”

“Sounds great dude.” He ruffled the young boy’s hair.

“You’re okay with stopping at Pledis to let them know we got here safely?”

No, no he wasn’t. Once again, the duties of a leader kept him from being close to you. Scratch that, it wasn’t the leader role; it was him being the oldest sibling and ensuring everyone got home safely. He nodded. “Yeah.’

Chan thumped his forehead affectionately. “Liar. Let’s go get food.”

*

“Wait, what do you mean you guys are home right now?”

“Yeah, Hannie hyung needed to get rest too,” Mingyu informed you on the other side of the computer screen. “That’s two down and I’m pretty sure they sent us all home because if any more of us can’t perform in America and we’ll have to cancel it...wait, where are you right now?”

One thing you loved about Seungcheol was how he didn’t blab to them about your personal life. He knew you had to leave but it also sucked knowing now where he was. “I had to come visit my family for a little bit. With Cheol taking time off for anxiety, I couldn’t handle not being able to help him or you guys, so I had to run away.” You hated how easily your voice cracked for feeling weak. “I have to go see you guys. I need to go tell Seungcheol that he needs to stay there so he can rest up.” You already began looking at your surroundings, ready to throw all the stray clothes into your suitcase. You didn’t know where to start and you could feel the prickliness at your fingertips. “I need to go spend the holidays with you.” You shook your head a couple times to keep a clear head.

“Take a breather, dude before you have a panic attack.” He turned around quickly in case the boy in question decided to come into the room. “Hey, hey. He’s fine. They both are. Shua hyung is making sure they’re resting.”

It eased you a little. Joshua may not have been the frontman, but he still had the same responsibilities as the other two. You just hoped he didn’t fall apart at the seams too, not because Junhui would be in charge but because if anyone else went down, they’d have to cancel the whole thing...not that it’d be a bad idea but you preferred it to under different circumstances.

“You can’t change his mind, I hope you know that.”

“For what?”

“He’s already said he’s coming with us. He’ll just be behind the scenes.”

“And you’re okay with that?” You saw him take a deep breath but he didn’t answer. “Mingyu?”

“We need him. Going without him just wouldn’t feel right. Hannie hyung will be back by that time and he’ll be making the decisions.”

“Mingyu, this is Seungcheol’s health, not some fucking good luck charm you can’t be without.”’

“I know that. You think we didn’t try telling him that? If he wasn’t so stubborn, everyone would be telling him to get his ass on the next flight to you. I’m sorry.”

“Is he with you now? Okay what's he doing?” 

“I don’t know.”

“Let me talk to him. Please Mingyu. I need to see for myself he’s doing better.”

He debated for a moment and let out the longest, “Hyung!” you’ve ever heard, followed by various voices chiming in “What?” and a few other words. “I need SCoups hyung. He has a visitor.”

You don’t know why you lost all self control and started bawling when you saw Seungcheol but you couldn’t help it. You had so much you wanted to say but you couldn’t put it in words and you wanted to fling yourself into the screen and go straight into his arms so you could give him a hug and assure him he’d be okay and everything would work out but you couldn’t and that just made you cry more.

“Jagi, if you keep crying, I’m gonna start crying and then we’re gonna have a problem,” he said, trying to make a joke but you could see that he was on the edge of tears too.

“I can’t help it. You’re there and I’m here and we’re so faraway and you’re not onstage where you belong and I can’t stop you from going to North America with the boys so you can rest and everything just feels like it’s falling apart.” Oh what you wouldn’t give to feel him stroke your hair and tell you it’d be alright.

“At least you’re being honest,” he chuckled. “And now I need to kill Mingyu for worrying you over nothing. I’m being careful, my love. I already know you want me here when you come back, but I can’t.”

“I know,” you sobbed. “Your responsibility of being their leader and making sure they’re okay is too important to you.” You found a sweater which you used to wipe your eyes.

“If I wasn’t the leader, you know I’d be there with you, right?”

Even in your emotional state you managed to giggle a bit, and even momentarily forget the heartache at seeing each other like this. At seeing him staring back at you with confusion, your giggles turned into laughs and you were finally able to dry your eyes with no more tears following behind.

“Jagi, what’s so funny?” He frowned, his lips inadvertently forming into a pout and in that moment, you never loved another man more. 

“ Cheol, did you know you’ve never lied to me about something so important before now?” The way he looked so lost just made your heart beat a little faster and grow a little more, so you elaborated. “Nothing can come between you and those boys. Not your rest, not your tour, and especially not me.” Not that you’d ever want to, of course.

“Hey, that’s not true. I moved in with you, remember?” His frown deepened and his lips pursed more, still not understanding why you found this situation so hilarious. Granted, he loved seeing you happy, but he’d rather be in the loop.

“You only moved in with me because I didn’t wanna move into the dorms with you after an apartment in my building caught fire,” you pointed out.

“Stop exposing me,” he whined.

“Stop making me fall in love with you.”

“Never. Just wait a little bit longer. We’ll be together soon.”

*

Seungcheol bounced his leg impatiently, no doubt irritating Jihoon, but he couldn’t help it. Of all the bad luck in this world. He was so close and so tired and they’ve been waiting in the same spot for over an hour. He should’ve been there with you already, kissing your face over and over again and tracing every part of it to jog his memory. His phone bored him to the point where he didn’t bother to pick it up anymore. He stared out the window in hopes of finding a clue that the train would move again soon.

Jihoon placed his hand over Seungcheol’s knee, stopping him. “Hyung, please stop doing that. You’re making me nervous.”

“I’m sorry...I just need to get home already. And if we could get moving already, that’d be great. We should’ve been there if we didn’t stop here.”

“Listen, I get that, and I respect that, but please don’t let those puppies that got rescued hear that,” Jeonghan chimed in, still half asleep. “We could’ve hurt them.”

“I’m sorry puppies,” Seungcheol mumbled. He didn’t know how much longer they waited, but by the time they got moving again, the stars were out and he saw many people in their cars waiting on either side of the tracks to get home as the day drew to a close. And when the city started looking familiar, Seungcheol sat up ramrod straight and almost knocked Jihoon out of his seat once he knew exactly where they were. He pulled out his duffel bag, accidentally hitting Seokmin in the arm and that caused Seokmin to smack Joshua awake. He was by the doors even before the conductor announced this was the final stop and rushed the other boys to hurry up because he didn’t wanna wait on them. They just had to clear everything with Pledis and then he could go home and finally be with you. He couldn’t wait. 

Once the doors opened, Hansol made sure to grab Seungcheol by the shirt collar in an attempt to keep everyone together. Getting recognized would’ve only slowed them down more and Seungcheol knew that, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. You were so close. 

And it finally seemed that the universe aligned something for him because once he stepped foot outside of the train station, he looked at his surroundings, the smell of food vaguely reminding him that he needed to eat. The chatter was loud from every direction as the crowds passed him and them, paying them no mind. He could taste the M&Ms that Jihoon had been kind enough to share and that made him focus a little more, but then he saw you, and he gripped the carry-on.

You didn’t know he was there; you didn’t see him, he realized. He focused on the bag in your hands, recognizing the logo of his favorite fast food restaurant and his heart did the thing. His brain finally disconnected from everything as he dropped the carry-on.

And he ran towards you.

#Seventeen #kpop seventeen #seventeen fic #seventeen fanfic #seventeen fluff #seventeen imagine #seventeen imagines #seventeen oneshot #seventeen angst #seventeen scenarios #seventeen scoups #seventeen x reader #seungcheol #seungcheol imagine #seungcheol imagines #seungcheol oneshot #seungcheol angst #seungcheol scenarios #seungcheol fanfic #seungcheol fluff #seungcheol fic #seungcheol x reader #scoups #scoups imagine #scoups fanfic #Scoups imagines #scoups oneshot #scoups angst #scoups scenarios #scoups fluff

[frenchy-and-the-sea]

13, 35 and 45? 👀 For anyone you'd like but you know im a big slut for Alex just in case no one else comes to mind 👀👀👀

For you? Anything bby <3 And also I love Alex so like this is also DEFO for me LMAO.

13. Which OCs complement each other the best?

- Oh god, this is going to be a surprise to absolutely no one but...Alex and Tahir. They were sorta designed to be complements in a lot of ways. Alex is the ambition to Tahir’s steadfastness; Tahir is the hearth-fire warmth to Alex’s chilly demeanor. They have a lot of the same goals and a lot of the same ideals, but they approach problems at different angles which means they work very well together. Which is probably why....

35. What is the most important relationship in OC’s life?

- ...the answer to this question is also Tahir, in Alex’s case. Probably vice versa too. While Adelina and Alex work out best as long term partners and support systems for one another, Tahir proving to Alex that she could trust him was a really formative experience for her. Their complementing personalities and back-and-forth devotion to taking care of one another were one of the first relationships that Alex felt solid in, so much so that she actually began to just ASSUME that he had her back. That is...not the case for many other relationships in Alex’s early life, so she treasures it all the more.

Still takes every opportunity she can find to rip on him though.

45. How much do OC’s friends know about their private life?

- A little? And it depends on which friend we’re talking about. Alex isn’t much for idle conversation about herself, and most of her working relationships are working-based, so she tends not to find herself in a position of oversharing much lmao. She isn’t shy about talking about her experiences - with the Navy, on the street, etc - but there’s some backstory bits that she glosses HEAVILY over, and she plays her interest in theater and reading closer to the chest than she rightfully needs to. Even among what she would consider her inner circle, only Tahir and Adelina have a close approximation of what Alex is like in private. Most everyone else gets The Captain.

#frenchy replies #oc crap #seven cities #alex sheffield #thank you for the questions!! #but yeah alex is uhhh pretty private #she didn't even tell Adelina much about her life on the street until several years after SC concludes #and only because someone from her past shows up to make it relevant

[unproduciblesmackdown]

prompts

April 26th: Talk about special interests. Do you have special interests? If not do you wish you did? What do your special interests mean to you? What are your current special interests? What are your past special interests? idk like i know i sure have & have had Interests, some more of interest than others, and it's also like, oh yeah i guess the ways i held that interest / explored it pretty intently / extensively / at length didn't always seem to be the way other people always felt about things even if we shared the interest, but yknow, at the same time it doesn't necessarily seem as extensive or major as some of the aspects of defining a Special Interest(tm) can be, i haven't been too pressed about it, but of course it's like, i have my Things lol, i.e. yeah this thing is kind of My Thing....and then i can look back on Things like. well idk when i was really little and you're just gonna like Cool Stuff, i did have the thing of like, i like dinosaurs and did sorta casually collect dinosaur stuff, easy enough b/c they make that stuff for kids, memorized a bunch of dinosaur Names so that just being asked to recite a bunch was something i was known to be able to do, a big fan of a couple semi educational computer games we had, shoutout to 3d dinosaur adventure and this magic school bus dinosaur (and ocean) game, had pajamas ft dinosaurs, rip to when i had a sick metal lunchbox with dinosaurs on it and it just broke on like week 1 of first grade or whatever and i just had to go back to default lunchboxes. well and then but anyways but from then on it was like, well, i guess it's media time......read a shit ton all the time, was into some tv series / movies, played some pc / video games, there was stuff i'd be glad to revisit over and over, and yknow, as this went on it'd be like, well now when there's A Relatable Enough Character in something i also like just in general, that's a powerful combo, though sometimes it's like, yeah i like this thing enough even in the absence of any particular [and i extra go hard about this character] element, that's not Not at play as it's like "well and i guess i will think about this quant every day for years now lmfao," and i can sure always talk about stuff At Length too, which sure is not something other people are generally interested in, but if/when they are, it's like okay great, this is a great connection point then, b/c otherwise it's like, i generally don't know what to say about myself, didn't get much practice, did pick up a sense of like, well stuff is Wrong about myself and my life so i shouldn't share it and also i'm not picking up friends so it was generally accurate that no one was exactly interested lmao. small talk is really more of a barrier / test you can just potentially fail, yet anything more personal is Oversharing, but hey i would earnestly love to talk at length about This Thing, so great when other people are into that at all lol and then if we vibe it's like, obviously that's the sort of functional "small talk" route here lol to being able to be more familiar w/each other and talk more generally, even if yknow, wuh oh, i'm kind of cagey outside those Interests i will talk about in ways that's probably "too much" by most ppl's standards, worst of both worlds when it comes to forming relationships but oh well, it is what it is and i sure don't consider it a bad thing i have plenty to say about things i Want to talk about, and it sure doesn't impede on anyone else if i'm Not Talking about other shit.

also then it's like, "idk what it is when you just determinedly Pursue something that's maybe still not the hugest deal, but i don't really feel very pressed re: figuring it out" like, does it count like how i mentioned today i'd read bird guides for fun as a kid, and watch this bird documentary and be like "hey. check out this scene in this bird documentary with this bird mimicry" to friends i now realize were probably mostly bemused by this, and really liked birds just generally (still true), and thus have like, maybe more Bird Knowledge than the average random person but also am hardly some self taught ornithological expert. or how i'm big into linguistics and etymology and, in theory, language learning, always really latching on to the little i was taught in school, also perusing some Language Guides available, and like, not really self teaching a bit re: learning some of a couple languages, just learning via teaching resources outside of [directly through any academic institution], never took any language classes, sure have no fluency in fuckall.........how about that i just decided as a kid like "hm i want to be able to draw" b/c i felt that way (and yknow, still do in a way lol) about pretty much anything, but i just also liked doodling and took some art classes and it was always this casual thing and now i use this to make fanart for the Media Interests lol, and although this is all digital drawing and drawing was always my primary thing it's like, well okay also yeah there was like, some painting / pastels / sculpting other Visual Arts stuff, and then, like, i sure enjoyed dance classes and the Performing Arts aspect of that, theatre gay adjacent b/w that and choir lol, have regular dreams about being part of impromptu dance performances, including just last night, rip to the special thwarting of "oh no i'm going around trying to get food before the show, getting stuck in traffic or lost in stores, and i've missed my whole first appearance" lol. anxiety dreams never end........and idk, i've had a love for math stuff, physics stuff, space stuff, even felt that [!] for the little i was able to get into circuitry and coding, but yknow. learning that shit is kind of involved and i only had so much experience re: taking classes, also, unfortunately, i always hated school lmao, so it's just kind of there where i'm like oh i get Into this shit in the ways that other people who are definitely Into it feel about it lmao. but yeah, idk, i do have like. well here's this sort of stuff i think about Every Day, this sort of mental home base sometimes, that i don't get tired of and reexplore / reexperience pretty intensively, but at the same time like, sometimes i can just sort of have something be that Interest for a lot more of a temporary duration, and things that were that main shit is like, well Probably when i like it that much once i like it down the line even if i haven't been that focused on it in the meantime, more just latent, but then it's like, well, but probably could and would still talk So Much about it still even if it's not like, oh yeah i'm Into This(tm) right Now lol..........idk! but i sure get really into shit and like, if anyone else is interested in me talking at length / drawing about it, that's sure probably the most successful grounds for Connection lmao cuz yknow. even people who maybe share that interest aren't guaranteed to see that and go "yeah this is someone i'm interested in actually talking to though" like yeah here's your preview of my personality i guess lol

April 27th: What is your favourite form of media? For example, do you enjoy books? What format do you prefer for books (physical, e-book, audiobook)? Did you love reading as a kid but find it challenging as you got older? How about movies, tv, or video games? Do you have a favourite series? yeah i read all the time as a kid, on the bus, if i finished shit early at school, on the bus again, also at home plenty, not so much when i was in college when it's like oh i can just do kinda whatever now (also as people point out it's like. well gotta do all this reading for classes now so) and then it was like, i'll get into other Media i can freely experience at any time, and also hang out with people Some, which i can also just do whenever now, as opposed to at any point before this......still like reading but it can sure kind of be a Whole Thing, like i either can't focus and it's like well time to read like, a paragraph or page a day, or else i'm focusing Too Much really like, if i'm at all trying to see how something ends i might burn through it in a few days (still a fairly slow reader) which is like, do i want to spend multiple days on this One Thing, even if it takes me like, multiple times the runtime to watch a movie or something, that's still probably getting done in 1 day. plus that yeah, mostly reading new shit via laptop, which is kind of a pain as opposed to physical books or like, e readers in theory, i've never actually used one. the only time i used an audiobook was a few times as a kid to read along with longer books to sort of help with that momentum, such a hot minute ago that this was via Tape Cassette.....i do listen to podcasts though, great for like, doing Something Else at the same time, which i don't know that i could split up that focus and guaranteed successfully absorb a book, Maybe So but select podcasts are my Extensive Audio of choice. never really watched that much tv, there were some stuff me and my siblings might watch as it aired, but not really Narrative Series lol, never seen shit, haven't even really watched That many movies either, still don't Really even though it's like yeah w/e in Theory i enjoy these mediums it's like oh my godddd it's a whole thing to focus on one and then plus what if i don't like it but i've had to put in all that time to know i didn't like it lmao.......i can enjoy keeping up with a tv series like, oh boy once a week a half hour to hour installment, that's a great format truly, but i'm rarely getting that experience lmao like. with billions you could stand 2 weeks between episodes b/c whew but it's v Rare like oh thank god, a series with that weekly release........but otherwise it's like ugh do i wanna have alllll this material to watch, do i wanna go through the whole process of figuring out what movie i feel like giving a try........and that i like Revisiting shit i already like pretty endlessly so it's like, i might just do that. so it's like, audio wise i'll put on podcasts, if i feel like watching something i Might be bothered to try out a movie or smthing b/c yknow, ultimately more doable to consume something that's just a few hours, all that when i'm Thinking About a tv series every day for years lmfao, shoutout to billions which sure gets to be my fave b/c tf else am i keeping up with, literally nothing else, even if i haven't gotten around to actually watching all of it yet / haven't simply sat straight through even the episodes i have watched, i Could do it but it's like god formidable when it's sure more than a movie's worth of content and plenty of "i don't care about this and/or hate this" to make me put my head through the wall lmfao thank you billions........also sometimes i remember like "oh yeah, i guess in theory i enjoy video games as well" but i didn't have That much experience w/them and sure don't now, so that's like well irrelevant ig. media

#30daysofautismacceptance #2021

[pesh-tigo]

sorry if this is too personal -- are you on hiatus from DV because you're bored of it or because of something else (don't need to specify if it's personal)? you were the one who got me hyped up for DV so if it's because you're bored as well... then RIP

Hey friend! No worries at all. (Is the internet not for oversharing and being too personal?) Kind of a mix of both to be honest. The “something else” part is that I had a really shitty job IRL that sucked all the life out of me, and then got a new job that I am really enjoying and have been doing other things with my life / playing other games that are more interesting to me (any of yall gonna play fallout 76? hmu).....

The “bored of it” part isn’t just strict boredom, again it’s kind of a mix of reasons. I still love a lot about Dappervolk but I think there are a lot of fair criticisms about it. I’m definitely... not the only one who’s grown a little distant from it. I guess I wish there was more interaction besides “click 1000 and read through this story”--for example, I just finished Visindy’s first part of the Silvie’s Mine storyline (yeah, yeah, that’s how far behind I am). There was a part in the story where it said something like “you look around and the cave is shining with crystals all around” (or something like that) and I thought, damn, how cool would it have been if there was an image that popped up, even if it were in the painterly style/not super detailed, that gave us an idea of what we could be picturing and what this cave looks like? Idk, I guess maybe some others would disagree and would rather picture it on their own? But for me I would love more visuals and things like that.

But I just don’t feel as engaged with the story and characters as I would have liked to and a lot of it does seem a bit grindy, and I’m not sure if I feel like it’s worth it to spend all the time grinding, because I don’t really know what I’m grinding for. Maybe once the premium shop comes into effect and there are big ticket items, but otherwise idk. And not to say that I dislike grinding, I’m fine with grinding, as long as it’s enjoyable.... but after you’ve created 500 “1 nip for 1 nip” trades it gets a lil bit tiring. Also in games, I like exploring, finding new things and locations, etc. It would be cool if there were new secret locations on the map that we could unlock by doing or completing certain things that weren’t part of the main storyline. I think I would be much more into the game if housing/guilds were around, so that’s one thing I can think of for official launch that I could get really into. Especially if I could interact with other players in real time. Don’t get me started about the issues with Adventuring. I hope to see a big improvement by the time official launch comes around, and I’m certain the staff will do so.

Also with the whole “datamining” accusations I just got so tired lmao. I felt like some folks were not-so-subtly hinting that I was an asshole for gathering info/spoilers or finding a cool thing and posting excitedly about it to keep the hype going (”we wanted this to be a surprise but SOME PEOPLE had to go ruin the fun for everyone” or acting like grabbing a image URL from a page was equivalent to hacking into the site) and tbh I got a lil bitter because of it. Not saying that I wasn’t in the wrong, I followed the rules afterwards and apologized, it was my bad, and I understand that the staff was upset and not everyone wanted to see easter eggs/spoilers. I’ve just never been on a site that had a rule against it before, or be so strict about it what is and isn’t “datamining”. So I kinda stopped working on spreadsheets and such because the energy and passion wasn’t there anymore (a super lame thing to say about spreadsheets, yeah, that’s my life).

Anyway, I’m sorry that you’re also feeling bored/detached from the site (that’s what I think you’re saying). And sorry that I can’t give you any reason or motivation to get back into it. :C Maybe after full launch things will be better? God I hope I’m more invested seeing as I invested hundreds of dollars into the site..... /sweatdrop I don’t have any plans for any more spreadsheets or polls, or to edit/finish any of the current ones I have out there, but maybe in the future I will. Also sorry this got so long, you sent me an ask right at the time I was looking into getting back into the site to finish out the story for beta (although I’m stuck at a part I literally can’t beat in time for the end of beta, so fuck me I guess) and reminiscing about things that have happened the past few months. If you want to discuss anything, feel free to hit me up again on here or on Discord. I guess this is kinda drama-y, sorry if this starts anything. I’m really not trying to start anything; I can honestly say I don’t care enough to do so. 

#asks #personal #drama #delete later probably #long post #sorry if this causes drama i'm just rambling #anonymous #dv

[tr-u-ce]

All of the get in my businesses!!!

YASSSSS

The meaning behind my url: Uh I was a 21p blog ages ago and truce is a v meaningful song so I haven’t really thought to change it to anything else to be honest

A picture of me: :^)

How many tattoos i have and what they are: I have none bc I’m both poor and a little bitch

Last time i cried and why: I think it was probably yesterday because I’m stressed about EVERYTHING

Piercings i have: I sorta have my ears pierced but I haven’t put earrings in them for over 10 years so they’ve p much closed up lmao rip

Favorite band: UHHH idk I haven’t listened to music properly in so long because I’ve had exams but I’m always going to be stanning The 1975 and Bastille until I die and I’m so in love w/ the Lumineers so?

Biggest turn offs: people that r just a bit too silly n stupid, being hurt and stuff, um idk 

Top 5 (Polish words): (in no particular order lmao omg I don’t have an awful lot to choose from) Chleb, Nie, miłość, jajko, żaba

Tattoos i want: I wan’t a little yin yang or mb like just a yin idk, um also I want all the lyrics to Eat Pierogi written on my forehead

Biggest turn ons: IDK I’m a baby lmao but um being nice to me lol idk um being dominant I need to be told what to do 24/7 lmao

Age: 18 but mentally about 5

Ideas of a perfect date: Walking a lot somewhere pretty like a forest or something and then going home and ordering chinese food

Life goal: To live in Poland and be able to speak the language well enough to be able to work as a nurse there

Piercings i want: Definitely my ears again, other than that I don’t think I can be bothered to get any more

Relationship status: Very much in a relationship

Favorite movie: I DON’T KNOW every time I watch a new film it becomes my favourite

A fact about my life: Uhh idk it’s not very interesting at the minute but hopefully I should be moving out soon and by hopefully I mean very very hopefully

Phobia: Flying, also like creepy crawlies walking all over me

Middle name: Leigh I guess

Height: Like 5′5 pretty much

Are you a virgin? Nop

What’s your shoe size? 5 I’m a baby

What’s your sexual orientation? I guess I’m graysexual but I just say I’m ace it’s easier

Do you smoke, drink, or take any drugs? I drink sometimes that’s about it

Someone you miss: Josh lol what’s new also my BAB

What’s one thing you regret? Taking Biology and Chemistry at A Level and wasting two years of my life

First celebrity you think of when someone says attractive: Alex Lawther, 

Favorite ice cream? EEE cookie dough

One insecurity: My stomach I hate it I want to cut it off

What my last text message says: ahhh okay xxxx

Have you ever taken a picture naked? lol yeah

Have you ever painted your room? No :(

Have you ever kissed a member of the same sex? Like at parties

Have you ever slept naked? Yeah like twice

Have you ever danced in front of your mirror? Way too many times

Have you ever had a crush? Way too many times

Have you ever been dumped? twice

Have you ever stole money from a friend? No erm

Have you ever gotten in a car with people you just met? I mean I have taken several taxis in my life but other than that I don’t think so no

Have you ever been in a fist fight? Not that I remember

Have you ever snuck out of your house? Yeah to play pokemon go 

Have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back? yes lol

Have you ever been arrested? uhhh no I am a very law abiding citizen

Have you ever made out with a stranger? no :/

Have you ever met up with a member of the opposite sex somewhere? Does this literally mean have you ever met up with a male somewhere because yes?

Have you ever left your house without telling your parents? Yes to play pokemon go

Have you ever had a crush on your neighbor? …no

Have you ever ditched school to do something more fun? Once me and Imogen were really late to school so we thought go big or go home and just got breakfast from the coop and ate it in the common room before signing in lmao

Have you ever slept in a bed with a member of the same sex? yeah plenty?

Have you ever seen someone die? I don’t think so as far as I can remember

Have you ever been on a plane? Twice and they were traumatic experiences 

Have you ever kissed a picture? uhhh I don’t recall doing so but I’m sure I probably have like as a little kid

Have you ever slept in until 3? uhhh I don’t think so (?) I might have done after a really late night w/ Luke

Have you ever love someone or miss someone right now? What the fuck does this mean like either way yes but ??

Have you ever laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by? Yeah once I did it at primary school and I thought that that was how fast the world was spinning and I got really really like disoriented and threw up or smth

Have you ever made a snow angel? no :(

Have you ever played dress up? yes lmao wtf I was a little girl ofc i did

Have you ever cheated while playing a game? I play a lot of monopoly so it’s far to say….. yes

Have you ever been lonely? NOOOOOO

Have you ever fallen asleep at work/school? I think like I’ve only fallen asleep once and that was in a German lesson watching a film after I’d done my first ever all-nighter

Have you ever been to a club? no:(

Have you ever felt an earthquake? yess twice they were p anticlimactic because both times I didn’t realise it was an earthquake until after

Have you ever touched a snake? I don’t think (?) so, not unless I was really young

Have you ever ran a red light? Not personally but I’ve been in plenty of vehicles that have bc we just don’t give a fuck around here

Have you ever been suspended from school? nope, almost though

Have you ever had detention? Never actually had a proper detention in my entire school career how sad is that

Have you ever been in a car accident? Not really I’ve been in one where we broke down and somebody hit the back of us really slowly

Have you ever hated the way you look? NOOOOOOOOOOOOO 

Have you ever witnessed a crime? I mean probably, I think I’ve seen a lot of people stealing shit

Have you ever pole danced? No but a girl can dream

Have you ever been lost? Probably yeah

Have you ever been to the opposite side of the country? Many times

Have you ever felt like dying? Many times

Have you ever cried yourself to sleep? Lmao many times

Have you ever sang karaoke? nope!

Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t? Definitely I can’t think of a specific example though bc my entire life is just ‘hannah no’ ‘hannah yes’

Have you ever laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? Not that I can recall but probably

Have you ever slept with someone at least 5 years older or younger? nope

Have you ever kissed in the rain? yess

Have you ever sang in the shower? nope:/

Have you ever made out in a park? I think I probably have

Have you ever dream that you married someone? I don’t think I have as far as like I can remember

Have you ever glued your hand to something? uh no

Have you ever got your tongue stuck to a flag pole? ….no?

Have you ever ever gone to school partially naked? I mean once I went in a very short dress my legs were v naked

Have you ever been a cheerleader? noooo

Have you ever sat on a roof top? Kinda I’ve sat on like a shed lmao

Have you ever brush your teeth? no, not once in 18 years

Have you ever ever too scared to watch scary movies alone? I’m v often too scared to watch scary movies alone

Have you ever played chicken? no because I’m not stupid

Have you ever been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? No I’ve literally never met anybody that owns a pool

Have you ever been told you’re hot by a complete stranger? Yeah bc men r weird

Have you ever broken a bone? No my bones may be bad but they ain’t snakes

Have you ever been easily amused? I’m always way too easily amused tbh

Have you ever laughed so hard you cried? Definitely 

Have you ever mooned/flashed someone? I mean my boyfriend yes

Have you ever cheated on a test? Yes and that’s why I won’t pass Biology

Have you ever forgotten someone’s name? Yeah I forgot my patient’s name and called them smth else and felt rly shit

Have you ever met someone who didn’t seem real? I’ve met many people who are too stupid to actually be real

Give us one thing about you that no one knows. I’m so oversharing I acc can’t think of something nobody in the world knows um mb that I’m ace? I mean I didn’t piece that one together myself for like 18 years lol

#answered #luke

[saintkimora]

ok! so just for the sake of recordkeeping i wanted to write about how my first date with dani went on monday night! it was super super fun and there was even a little twist

so! on monday after my botany final i was gonna go to the gym since i was trying to get in as much working out as possible since the gym will be closed from like friday to after new years. but i was snapchatting dani by this point and i asked how he was doing and he said he was bored and lonely so i was like lets hang out

so we decided to meet at this mall thats between our houses that way neither of us had to drive the whole way bc its kinda far. so i got there after like a 30 min drive and it took a while to find his car but i finally did! so i got out of my car and went into his and saw him and........whew

he was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO cute OMG like he was just adorable not just his looks but also his mannerisms and how he was talking and stuff like.......omg 

i dont even remember what we talked about first, but he was so cute and we eventually kissed and he was such a good kisser too! and he was wearing a gray hoodie and he had the cutest belly and he had nice titties too!! and thick thighs!! and his hair is very touchable and his voice is soooooooo cute omg he has Gay Voice 

we talked about stuff and i gave him lots of leaning-over cheek kisses just while we were talking and he was loving it and it was so cute. and like when i complemented him he would get sooooooooooooo flustered and he would giggle or cover his face with his hands it was the cutest thing 

then we decided to get food so we were driving around for a while bc we are both indecisive and didnt know what to get. so while we were driving he was showing me all these songs he liked and telling me about his favorite music and it was so cute. and he likes cupcakke!! then we decided to get taco bell and the drive through line was soooo long but i didnt mind bc we were just gonna be sitting in the car regardless

so we got food (he paid even though i wanted to pay for my part) and went back to the mall parking lot and we were eating. then things got personal real fast and he opened up to me about a LOT but it wasnt quite oversharing bc it was kinda relevant. im not gonna say what these things are bc thats his business but it was just like so much.....like this year has been REALLY bad for him rip but at least now i can try to make the last few weeks of it as nice as possible for him! i also appreciated how easy it was for him to show vulnerability bc that is def a quality i am looking for in a man

so yeah we spent a few hours together talking and stuff, hes really pleasant to talk to and hes so cute like i just wanted to squeeze him!! at one point i felt like i was talking too much so i was like sorry am i talking too much but he was like no i like hearing your voice....like hes so cute!! i want to just hug him all day and protect him and make him happy

at one point i was talking about work and out of nowhere he just leaned over and grabbed my face and kissed me for a bit and then afterwards he was like “sorry, i couldnt help it” like OMGGGGGGGG this is a MAN

he was very into me he was giving me lots of complements which i liked very much, he even liked my fanny pack!! and we are looking for pretty much the same thing relationship-wise so i think this is gonna be good! he cant be out past 11 though bc his parents give him a curfew (even though hes my age) bc they arent supportive and dont want him out doing gay things so they force him to come home by 11 like that is so sad and very annoying on their part

now for the twist. it turns out that hes friends with caleb LMAO he went on one date with him but didnt like him too much and now calebs been pestering him about going out the past few days, he tried to call him and dani was like ew no. so i exposed caleb to him and we bonded over how much we dislike him lmao

so then it was time for me to leave. so i got out of the car and you know how when you open car doors the lights turn on? so the lights turned on and i saw him in full lighting again (since it was night time so it was dark) and he looked sooooooooooooooooooooooo good omfg like i really got lucky with this one!!! i cant believe a few weeks ago i was all like “oh ill never find a guy as hot as joel” bc i literally just found one even hotter not even a month later LMAO

so yeah! and then we’ve been texting pretty much constantly ever since. hes really sweet and really into me and im so excited to pursue a relationship with him!! we get along very well and i cant wait to spend more time with him!! we’re going on a date to the city tomorrow so im gonna get to spend a whole day with him!!

#personal #dani #im gonna start a tag for dani posts just for future reference

[littlelovelymemes]

✰ * º ❛ more popular text posts ask meme. ❜

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#rp meme #ask meme #indie rp #sentence starters #rp sentence meme #inbox meme #inbox memes #rp inbox meme #sentence starter meme #rp sentence starters #starters #rp ask meme #rp ask box meme