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nellasbookplanet · 3 months

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Book recs: the evil fungi did it

We all know of The Last of Us, but that franchise isn't the only example of fungal invasions. We've got zombies and apocalypses, we've got gothic horror, we've got fantasy, we've got romance, we've got space - no genre is safe from having their characters become the home of fungal organisms.

For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. And as always, feel free to share your own recs in the notes!

If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!

The Girl with all the Gifts (The Girl with All the Gifts series) by M.R. Carey

Want another fungal zombie apocalypse? Then I come bearing great news! The Girl with All the Gifts is a post apocalyptic novel following a group of characters fleeing across an infested wasteland, trying to stay alive and hoping to find a cure. One of the characters is Melanie, a young girl who carries the contagion inside of her and hungers for flesh, but like many children of the apocalypse has kept her humanity. Is she and children like her the answer to the cure we are looking for? Or are they the start of something entirely new? This book has also been adapted as a movie!

Cold Storage by David Koepp*

Years ago, a quickly growing fungal organism capable of wiping out humanity came dangerously close to spreading. It was contained and kept in cold storage underneath a military repository. Since then, a larger storage facility has been built on top, the dangers on the lower floor being largely forgotten. That is, until it makes a new attempt at escape. Now, two unsuspecting security guards might be all that stands in the way of complete extermination. This book is both funny and genuine in its characters, and genuinely creepy in its portrayal of body horror.

Salvaged by Madeline Roux

Rosalyn Devar is on the run from her famous family, and has run so far she ended up in space. Now she works as a "space janitor", being sent off to clean up the remains of failed research expeditions. But in trying to cope with her problems, she has fucked up on her job multiple times, and is now close to losing her position. Her last chance is the Brigantine: a research vessel gone silent, all crew presumed dead. But when she arrives to salvage it, Rosalyn discovers the crew isn't as dead as presumed. But are they still human - and will Rosalyn be able to keep her own humanity?

The Annual Migration of Clouds by Premee Mohamed

Novella. Reid is a young woman living in a small community after a climate collapse. Resources are scarce, but Reid's biggest problem is Cad, a mind-altering fungal parasite that lives inside her body. When she is offered a rare chance at attending a far-away university in a secluded dome community, Reid must decide whether to leave or stay to help support her community.

Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia*

Noemí Taboada is a glamorous and well-off young woman, but when she receives a frantic letter from her newly-wed cousin, Noemí must leave her glamorous life and travel to find out what is wrong. As she arrives at High Place, a mansion on the Mexican countryside, Noemí is met with mysteries and her cousin's new English family. As she tries to find out the truth behind High Place and its inhabitants, Noemí's only ally is the youngest son of the family. But will she be able to find out what so scared her cousin before it's too late for all of them?

Sorrowland by Rivers Solomon

A young pregnant woman flees a cult that left her body strange and changing in terrifying ways. Hiding from both a world wanting to oppress her and the cult seeking to force her back, she does her best to raise her children while trying to find out the truth of the cult and being pursued by a hunter in a dangerous game of cat and mouse. Bleak and scary, Sorrowland is a book that will creep under your skin with horrors both fantastical and very, very real.

What Moves the Dead (Sworn Soldier duology) by T. Kingfisher

Novella. Alex Easton, retired soldier, travels to visit their childhood friends, siblings Madeline and Roderick Usher, after finding out that Madeline is dying. In the siblings' rural, ancestral home, Madeline walks in her sleep and looks to be fading away, while around it wildlife seems to be possessed by a strange force. With the help of a mycologist and an American doctor, Alex attempts to save Madeline and reveal the truth of her illness.

Wanderers (Wanderers duology) by Chuck Wendig

A strange illness has struck the United States: with no warning, random people with seemingly no connection simply get up and start walking. They do not eat, do not sleep, do not communicate, and they do not stop - and if you try to force them, they literally explode from the inside. Teenaged Shana isn't one of these sleepwalkers, but her little sister is. Unwilling to leave her sister on her own, Shana accompanies the growing flock of walkers, protecting them as one of many "shepherds". And this protection proves necessary, as the sleepwalkers is only the first step toward what might very well be the extinction of the human race. An 800 page epic, Wanderers is a slowburn apocalypse story with a multitude pov characters and plot threads, from fungal pandemics and all-knowing AI to the all too real portrayal of radicalization and bigotry.

The Dawnhounds (The Endsong series) by Sascha Stronach

The Dawnhounds is a book where you just kind of have to let the story and the world wash over you. It skirts the line of scifi and fantasy, with a futuristic world of environmentally friendly mushroom houses and deadly fungi bio weapons next to literally god-given superpowers and near-immortality. It’s really cool and unlike anything else I’ve ever read, but also a bit confusing. Bonus: it’s also sapphic!

Agents of Dreamland (Tinfoil Dossier trilogy) by Caitlín R. Kiernan

Novella. A government agent known only as the Signalman; a cult preying on the young and vulnerable, promising to usher in a new age; a woman who exists outside of time, searching for a way to save humanity. Agents of Dreamland is short, but includes many spooky elements, among them an alien and possibly world-ending fungi. The narrative is non-linear and a bit strange, but also fascinating.

The Genius Plague by David Walton

Soon after landing his dream job at the NSA, things get weird for Neil Johns. His brother Paul, a mycologist, returns from a trip to the Amazon, carrying a nearly lethal fungal infection and a strangely sharpened mind. At work, Neil starts picking up mysterious messages originating out of South America, where cases similar to that of Paul starts occurring. And strangest of all: all the infected seem to be working towards the same goal. Recommended with the caveat that, while the fungal stuff is really cool, The Genius Plague is also happy to idolize American intelligent agencies and demonize environmentalism and anti-imperialism.

Little Mushroom: Judgement Day (Little Mushroom duology) by Shisi

An Zhe isn’t human. He’s a mushroom who absorbed the DNA of a dying man, allowing him to take on human guise and leave the wilderness. Entering one of the last human bases, a place struggling to keep out the mutated and dangerous creatures of the wilds, An Zhe must keep his identity secret as he searches for something which was taken from him. While not my cup of tea (frankly, I need more female characters), Little Mushroom is an undeniably unique m/m romance novel.

Bonus AKA these don't technically involve any fungi but have similar vibes of parasites and nature corrupting the human

Parasite (Parasitology trilogy) by Mira Grant*

In the near future, a great leap in medical science has improved human health by leaps and bounds: a genetically engineered tape worm. Within a few years, almost every human has their own personal parasite implanted. But now, something is happening to the parasites - they want more, whether their hosts want to share or not.

Annihilation (Southern Reach trilogy) by Jeff Vandermeer

For decades, Area X has been completely cut off from humanity. The only ones to enter are small organized expeditions, many of which never return, or return... wrong. We follow the latest expedition, its participants known only as the anthropologist, the psychologist, the surveyor, and our narrator, the biologist. As they enter into Area X to try to find out its secrets, only one thing is for sure: they will never be the same again.

Wilder Girls by Rory Power

Young adult. Over a year ago, the Raxter School for Girls was hit by the Tox, a strange disease that killed off many and left the survivors' bodies slowly changing in terrifying ways. The island the school is on has been in quarantine since then, and the girls dare not leave the school grounds lest they become victims of wild animals changed by the Tox. But as they wait for the promised cure, one of the girls goes missing, and her friends are willing to do anything to find her. Unsettling, spooky, and sapphic, this is a unique read featuring body horror and messy, dangerous girls.

(Second) Bonus AKA I haven't read these yet but they seem really cool

City of Saints and Madmen (Ambergris trilogy) by Jeff Vandermeer

Ambergris, a city created by a mushroom-like people, is now the home of humans, but the original inhabitants are still there, residing beneath the city.

Creatures of Want and Ruin (Diabolist's Library series) by Molly Tanzer

It’s the prohibition era, and while Ellie does fishing during the day, at night she bootlegs moonshine in Long Island. But unbeknownst to Ellie, some of the booze she smuggles has a strange source: distilled from mushrooms by a cult, it causes those who drink it to see terrible things, such as the the destruction of Long Island.

Bloom by Wil McCarthy

The inner solar system has been overtaken by fast-reproducing, fast-mutating technogenic life. Humanity has fled to the outer solar system, hiding beneath the ice of Jupiter's moon, but even here they aren't safe from possible incursion of mycospores, which lead to deadly blooms. Now a group of astronauts venture back to an infected Earth.

#the girl with all the gifts #cold storage #salvaged #the annual migration of clouds #mexican gothic #sorrowland #what moves the dead #wanderers #the dawnhounds #agents of dreamland #the genius plague #little mushroom #parasitology #annihilation #wilder girls #nella talks books

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procrastiel · 25 days

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My highlights from The Assembly:

Was John Taylor from Duran Duran your first ever crush? “Yes, he absolutely was.” Michael thought he was the most beautiful person he’d ever seen, man or woman. And he tried to imitate his hairdo (didn’t work out though, because Michael’s hair is really curly and John’s is straight).

He’s not brave enough to go on Strictly because he thinks he’s not a good dancer.

How does it feel to be dating someone that is only 5 years older than your daughter? “Both of us were quite surprised when we got together, it wasn’t something we were looking for. I haven’t dated anyone who is much younger than me but you meet who you meet. We were both very aware how people might respond, and that it would be difficult and challenging, but ultimately we felt that it was worth it, because of how we felt about each other. And now we have two beautiful children together. We’re really, really happy. I am aware that I am a much older father, and it does worry me, and makes me concerned, and makes me sad thinking about the time that I won’t have with them. But if you find someone who brings you happiness and you make them happy you gotta go for that. So that’s what we decided to do, and I’m so happy we did because we have this wonderful family now.”

The next question (asked by the same girl) was: Who is the rudest celebrity? “Have you heard of a man called David Tennant? He was Doctor Who. Doctor rude! No he’s very nice. Someone will occur to me and I’ll let you know. (pause) Jennifer Laurence was very cheeky! She is very cheeky.”

How tall are you? “I’d like to be 5”11 but I’m closer to 5”10.”

He likes Dylan Thomas, even though he doesn’t understand all of his poetry.

He cries probably every day. And it’s totally fine to feel things deeply and get emotional about things.

His favourite Disney film is Moana. And that’s Mabli’s favourite movie at the moment, too. She watches it about twice a day.

He’s worried that AI will take his job away, and that it will change everything, not just actors and writers. And that by the time we will want to put a stop to certain things it’ll be too late.

His favourite food is Egg and chips. Only enhanced by ham.

He loves going by train.

If he could replace 2 people of the royal family he’d take away Andrew & Camilla and replace them with Joe Lycett & David Attenborough. Or Tom Jones as the Prince of Wales!

If he could play the Doctor or the Master, he’d like to play the Master and play opposite David Tennant as the Doctor.

His biggest fear is being alone. And it’s also what he worries about the most for other people.

Hot or cold? He does like winter and snow. ❄️

Walk us through the before, during and after of the kiss with David Tennant: reading the script he thought “that’s gonna be a big deal”. They didn’t really talk about it and just went for it. Everyone was quite moved by the scene, all the people around them, so they knew it had gone quite well. And now they never talk about it. (He said that last bit with a smile.)

5 OF THE INTERVIEWERS SANG HERE COMES THE SUN FOR HIM AND EVERYONE JOINED IN AT THE END 😍 Michael had tears in his eyes

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unreliablesnake · 4 months

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Play stupid games... (Simon Riley x reader)

Summary: Simon agrees to pose as your boyfriend for the holidays. Since he has been in love with you for years, it turns out to be quite a bad decision.

Note: It took me a long time. But it's here now. Happy new year!

Simon had known you for almost three years now, spending most of this time thinking about asking you out. But he never did it. Why would you agree to be with him when he usually disappeared for months all of a sudden because of his job? Since he didn’t want to risk losing you for good, he decided to keep his feelings to himself, silently suffering every time you cried on his shoulder after a breakup, or when you couldn't shut up about your new boyfriend.

But then one day, maybe a week before Christmas, you stood there in front of his door with this big, Cheshire cat smile on your face, hands folded behind your back as you watched him. “Can I come in?” you chimed, and how could he say no to that?

Little did he know you would come up with a plan so risky he would for the very first time consider saying no to you. He didn't like the idea, not one bit, mostly because he didn't feel like lying to your family. A family that probably didn't even know he existed.

“Come on, Simon, I never ask for anything,” you tried with a sweet smile.

He knew you were right. You never even asked him to come and fix something around your place, or to give you a ride after a long night out with your friends. This was, after all, nothing more but a small favor, a little lie he would have to keep up until the holidays were over.

“If I agree to do this,” he began slowly, not missing the hopeful shine in your eyes, “you will have to lie to your parents and other relatives, telling them we've been together for months. Are you sure you're ready for it?”

You inched closer on the couch, a delicate hand resting on his knee as you looked him in the eye. “Look, they usually hate the guys I invite, but they keep asking why I'm single if I arrive alone. I just know they wouldn't dare to pick a fight with you. Scary dog privilege and all.”

With a sigh, Simon leaned his head on the back of the couch as he looked up at the ceiling. He always wanted to know what it would be like to be with you. What it would be like to hold your hand, to have you snuggled up to him on the couch, or to kiss you. This plan of yours gave him the perfect chance to experience all of these during the holidays.

And so a few days later the two of you were standing in front of the door of your parents' house, hand in hand, of course, because who would think he was a simple friend when your fingers were laced with his so tightly. He didn't mind; no, he actually liked it a lot. It was good for the both of you, making you calmer and more focused on this night ahead.

“Oh, look at that, you made it on time this year! I’m so happy to have you here. Come on in, you two,” an older woman said with a bright smile as she clapped her hands excitedly.

She was acting as if she was in her twenties, dressing in clothes which gave away that she wasn’t exactly in a good shape. But Simon bit his tongue before he could say anything offensive, staying silent even when you made a barely noticeable comment regarding her choice of clothing. Was she really that dumb? That woman kept talking as if you’d said nothing; she was either too stupid to pick up on your words, or decided to completely ignore them.

“Your parents are in the kitchen, helping David with the dinner. I wouldn’t advise you to go there, you know what David’s like when he cooks. But your cousin Allistair has been looking for you.”

And with that she turned around and walked away, not even bothering to excuse herself. Simon raised an eyebrow as he glanced down at you. “Am I invisible?” he asked half-jokingly, the corners of his lips turning upwards when you put your free hand on his chest. He wondered if you could feel how his heart was racing at that moment from your touch.

You let out a sigh as you looked around, searching the rooms you could see from the bottom of the stairs. “Don’t mind her, she thinks all of my relationships are doomed. You’re just a random guy I brought with myself in her eyes,” you explained once you turned back to him.

“At the end of the day that’s all I am,” he noted quietly. You asked him what he said, but Simon just shook his head without repeating the sentence.

Allistair turned out to be a pretty cool guy. He was Scottish, cocky, and funny, which reminded him of Johnny. Unlike your aunt, he actually greeted him, asking about him before starting a long speech full of embarrassing stories from your youth. Simon was grateful and he didn’t even feel like moving on and meeting other members of your family.

But when one particular story came up, you were quick to interrupt him and drag Simon away from your cousin. “I’m sorry, but you shouldn’t hear that one. Let me introduce you to my parents.”

The parents. Great. Apparently you had been planning this for months, telling your parents stories about your tough military boyfriend they couldn’t meet because he was often away. You knew perfectly well he would agree, and this made him wonder if he was too naive for his own good. You were playing him like a violin and he shouldn’t be like this, acting like some stupid, lovesick teenager.

All of his worry disappeared when you took his hand, though. “What are you doing to me?” he muttered quietly to himself.

You came to a halt and turned to him. “What?”

“Nothing.”

After a nod, you continued your journey to the kitchen, dragging him along through the empty hallway. When you reached your destination, you immediately flashed a wide smile at the people inside before going closer to greet them properly. Simon found it awkward to just stand there and wait. The last time he had been introduced to parents and relatives was in his teenage years a long time ago. He was out of practice.

You returned to him soon and put your hands on his upper arm. “Mom, Dad, David, he’s Simon, my boyfriend,” you said as you grinned up at him.

Simon’s heart melted at the sight. He wished he could kiss your pretty lips, but he didn’t want to push his luck. Your mother gave him a warm smile before quickly washing her hands and walking over to see him from up close. For a few seconds she was just silently studying his face, and then she put a hand on your shoulder as she gave you a serious look.

“He’s really handsome, honey, good choice. And a military man! I’m sure he can keep you safe.”

She then introduced herself and the others, the men even came over to shake his hand. Simon talked to all three, answering a series of questions about his relationship with you. He didn’t mind since the two of you had previously fabricated nice little stories to tell your family.

Once they returned their attention to the dinner they had left unattended for a short while, you took his hand again before pulling his head down with the other to kiss him. It was just for show, he knew it, but it still felt so real, so good, and he was on cloud nine. Maybe he was just imagining things, but he could have sworn you were smiling up at him like a satisfied cat once he pulled away.

The rest of the evening was a walk in the park after meeting your parents and convincing them you were dating for real. Simon often took your hand, drawing circles into your skin absentmindedly as he had a conversation with a relative of yours. They seemed to like him, although there was a little girl who always ran back to her parents when he came too close to her.

After the guests began to leave, you announced your departure as well, and Simon took you home like a good boyfriend. You gave him a kiss on the cheek next to the car when you got there, then said goodbye and headed to the building. But he couldn’t just let you go like that, he had made up his mind during the evening that he would finally tell you how he felt.

“Wait,” he said as he went after you. You stopped and turned around with a questioning hum, but instead of giving you a verbal answer, he started with a proper kiss. You seemed surprised at first, but then you returned it for his relief. “I’ve been in love with you for a long time, you know,” he said when he pulled back.

“Oh.”

That was all you said. He didn’t expect you to say it back, but he still expected you to say something more than this. Yes, it was probably a lot to take in, but you could have said you needed time to think about it, that it took you by surprise and you weren’t sure you knew what you wanted. But no. That was all he got.

“I should go,” you said with a gulp before going inside, twisting the knife in his heart with this reaction.

Weeks passed without him hearing from you. During that time he had to go back to base, and becoming Ghost once again took his mind off you. There he was a soldier, not Simon. He couldn’t let his emotions make him unfocused. But despite his best efforts, Price noticed that something was different. That something was off about his lieutenant.

So one evening he summoned Simon, officially to talk about a situation on the other side of the planet, unofficially to find out what was wrong with him. “Can I offer you a drink?” Price asked him when he sat down. When the lieutenant shook his head, he let out a sigh and sat down behind the desk. “I consider you a friend, Simon. I hope you know you can always talk to me.”

A groan left his throat upon hearing this. Price knew Simon, but here he was Ghost. He had to be Ghost, otherwise he would go insane. Because every night when he was left alone with his thoughts, he found himself staring at the screen of his phone, thinking about you. Should he call you? Should he send you a message?

“You don't have to, but it might help,” Price pressed on, but he only raised a hand and shook his head. “Listen, I know your head is here with us. I appreciate that. But you need to talk to someone. Is this about your family? The anniversary of what happened to them?”

Shaking his head again, the lieutenant leaned back in the chair. “It's not about my family, I made peace with that. Sort of. As cliche as it sounds, it's about a woman. I don't know what to do.”

Price lit a cigar as he watched him. They weren't that far apart in age, and he had a feeling the captain considered him a friend at the end of the day. It wasn't unusual for the two of them to go out for a drink between missions, discussing quite a lot of things, including each other's private life. While he didn't have much to say, his superior talked a lot about his family and women he was chasing.

“Tell me. What happened?”

“I kissed her and she stopped talking to me,” he said, opting to give the short answer to the captain. He sent a disapproving look in his way, clearly expecting a little more than that. After a gulp, he went on. “All right. So she asked me to pose as her boyfriend for the holidays. I agreed because I’m a fucking idiot who had been in love with her ever since we met. After we spent the evening with her family, I took her home and kissed her. I tried to call her, but she ignored me. I think she's mad.”

“You shouldn't have done that,” Price told him calmly. Simon was a little confused, and no matter how hard he thought, he couldn't figure out what he meant. Probably seeing the look on his face, the captain let out a sigh, blowing out some smoke. “Playing her boyfriend. You shouldn't have done that if you love her. It just makes you more desperate.”

Simon nodded. “You're right.”

“Well… Maybe she just needs time. But I don't know her, so,” he said, finishing the sentence with a shrug. “Gaz tells me a lot about his issues with women, but I swear he handles it better than you do.”

“Thanks. That helps a lot,” the lieutenant said with a hint of sarcasm in his voice. “Why don't I ever hear about your issues? It's always so easy for you based on your stories.”

“What can I say? I'm good at charming the ladies,” Price replied, a laugh filling the room as he got rid of the remains of the cigar.

Over a month later Simon finally went home, and a few days after his arrival he found himself lying on his bed in the middle of the day, staring at the ceiling as he thought about calling you. Would you finally pick up and talk to him? In the end he decided to send you a text instead.

Simon: Hey. Wanna meet me for a drink?

Two excruciatingly long hours later a notification showed up on his screen.

You: Sure. Where?

Simon: My place? I'll order dinner.

You: Not sure that's a good idea.

Simon: Come on.

You: All right, fine.

You arrived not long after the conversation, holding a bottle of wine you two often drank on nights like this. The situation was awkward as Simon didn't really know what to do or say. A part of him wanted to apologize for the kiss, hoping you could forgive him and continue your friendship as if nothing happened. But another part was ready to beg you to be open-minded now.

When the door closed behind you, he leaned against it and watched as you slipped out of your sneakers and walked into the kitchen as if you lived there. A smile crept on his lips at the thought of you living with him. That would be nice. He could get used to the idea.

The next time he laid his eyes on you, you already had two glasses of wine in your hands, getting closer to him with a small smile. “You surprised me with that kiss,” you finally spoke up.

Simon took the glass from you, suddenly feeling nervous. “You didn’t forget about it.” You shook your head before taking a sip of your drink. “I’m sorry, I just… I know that was a lot to dump on you that night.”

“No, it’s okay. I had some time to think. You’re a great guy, Simon, any girl would be lucky to have you by their side,” you began to explain, causing him to let out a long sigh of defeat. “I’m one of those girls.”

“Are you saying what I think you’re saying?” With a short laugh, you immediately nodded and stood on your toes in front of him. “Does this count as our first date?”

He leaned down a little to give you a quick kiss. “No, you have to take me somewhere nice,” you told him.

“I’ll think of something.”

“Think of the place where we went after that party all those years ago. You know, when we first met.”

This surprised Simon. He tilted his head to the side as he watched you with a confused look on his face. “That was a McDonald’s.” You shrugged with a smile. “God, I love you.”

#simon ghost riley #simon riley #ghost #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #modern warfare #call of duty #mw2 #mw3

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europaprisonmoon · 1 year

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I’m releasing a TTRPG supplement

Kind of says it all, really. Brought to life by the illustrations of the talented Kate Lucas (https://skeejeedoodles.carrd.co/), the supplement is on sale now at: https://hyrune.itch.io/the-goblin-market Hey folks. My name is David, I’m a queer games designer and writer from Ireland. In the autumn of last year, I was made redundant from my job of eleven years, and taking a look back over that time I realised I’d lost time. I’d lost so much creative spark that previously drove me, and in a fit of frenzied, caffeine-fuelled panic inspiration, I got to work making something. I’ve been playing tabletop RPGs for many years, both as a GM and as a player. As a GM, I’ve occasionally struggled when players go off the beaten track - you haven’t lived until you’ve stared blankly around the table, trying to think of a name for a random NPC you didn’t anticipate at all, having your eyes land on a coffee cup and proudly declaring their name is “Uhhhh... Muggsley.” If you’ve ever been in a position where your players are shopping, and you’ve had to quickly drum up a string of shopkeepers and vendors on-the-fly, this book might just help you. The Goblin Market is a system agnostic collection of over fifty merchants, monsters and even stranger things which can be dropped into your campaign to add weirdness and magic for your players: retired river gods, escaped nightmares, tea merchants, vengeful dragons seeking to raise an army to defeat tyrannical princesses, off-duty demons, magical roboticists, mystery cults, accidentally immortal witches, and more besides. Each entry details a merchant and the items they both buy and sell, but also contains a number of plot hooks (over 140, last time I checked) so you can give your players sidequests to investigate. Each vendor can be dropped into your game on their own, but also exists in a setting of their own - a setting where each market stallholder invokes and involves other entries and merchants as rivals, romantic interests, family members and possible eldritch accomplices from the days before the Moon was born. It’s a living, breathing place, and I’ve loved writing it so, so much.

#ttrpg #rpg #tabletop #d&d #homebrew #roleplaying

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itgetsdark-x · 1 year

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I have a request for Joel x reader where the reader has never been in a relationship where her orgasm was important to her partners so Joel makes it a mission to make her cum as many times as possible 👀

Oh anon, sweet anon I couldn’t turn down this request if I tried. I just know Joel would wanna satisfy his partner in bed as many times as he wanted to. I just 🧎🏻‍♀️ I hope you like it, I kinda rushed it a little as I was too excited to write it but yeah! Thanks for the request <3 I’m gonna go and hide now <3

Warnings: 18+, please it’s just smut. Oral (f receiving), mild breeding kink if you squint a little, unprotected p in v sex (wrap it, be sensible), use of good / little girl a lot, age gap (reader is mid - late twenties, Joel would be older but not explicitly stated), roughly follows the game / show but not at all lol cause the timeline is way off

Summary: Joel knew you had been left frustrated by your previous partners and well, when he heard you moan his name he couldn’t deny you the pleasure any longer.

Characters: Joel Miller x (f) reader

Word Count: 4.7k

A/N: y’all know how bad I’m down for Joel rn, and I saw this tiktok that had me truly feral and frothing at the mouth so me being the true slut I am for this man, I had to include the dialogue. You’re welcome. Just as a little side note, I have all the other requests in my inbox and I love them all, I will work my way through but I work full time so please be patient, my loves <3

Before the outbreak happened, you had never had a boyfriend, not a proper one anyway and well, since then it had only gone downhill. You were in high school when the outbreak happened and miraculously you had managed to escape and actually survive. You had lost your family along the way and met up with a man called Joel Miller. You first met him in the Boston QZ, and since then you had become a team. It had been years and you were in your late twenties now, still teamed up with Joel but a few years back you took Ellie on with you. It had been a messy journey but one that was so worth it, Ellie was your bestfriend and Joel fathered her like his own. She was just a teenager but she had seen so much in her short life that had matured her much beyond her years.

After the outbreak, and in the world of dating, men seemed to be greedier at chasing their own highs rather than actually satisfying you in anyway, shape or form. The only orgasms you had really experienced in the past few years were from ones you had drawn from yourself; those long nights where you shifted in your bed and let your fingers give you some much needed relief. Still, you would have traded all of those orgasms for one decent one from another man.

“Are you listening to me? Hello?” Ellie snapped her fingers in front of your face. “I was saying,” she huffed. “I was saying, how was that date with David the other night, haven’t seen you since and I wanna know all the juicy details.” She giggled.

You were pulled out of your thoughts but you continued to stare at the food on your plate, you pushed it around before admitting defeat and setting your knife and fork down. “It was awful.” You whined. “Absolutely awful, like guys really only care about getting off themselves. I haven’t had a decent orgasm in years.” You complained and just as you finished your sentence, Joel joined you both at the table.

He cleared his throat awkwardly and you felt embarrassment rise in you. “Sorry, Joel.” You mumbled and Ellie was biting back a humungous laugh; you shot her a look and she tried to stifle the noise further.

“Anyway… I should be heading off to school.” Ellie giggled and looked at your embarrassed face and Joel’s awkward demeanour.

The three of you had settled down in Jackson after your journey temporarily ended when Joel finally located Tommy. It was a decent place; so long as you stayed in line and did your fair share of jobs. You helped out in various places; you helped tend to the animals, you sometimes assisted in classrooms and you were known to frequent shifts in the kitchen. Joel ran defence classes, teaching the older teens how to shot their guns, how to fight with weapons and generally preparing them for if they ever needed to evacuate and look after themself in the wild. He always did frequent patrol shifts around the walls, much like his brother did. In return the three of you had a decent three-bedroom home and for the first time in years, stability and safety. You were just pleased that it offered Ellie a small sense of normality and belonging.

“David is an asshole.” Joel stated with a smirk.

“Yeah, well, I know that now.” You laughed bitterly, no humour behind the noise at all.

“You know… some men out there do actually care about pleasing women. Not all. But some.” Joel said nonchalantly and it only caused your blush to grow deeper in your cheeks.

“Yeah, well, when you find one. Send them my way, yeah?” You said bluntly and rose from the table, taking your plate. “I’ve got a shift in the kitchen now and then I’m out at the farm for the afternoon. Ellie is going round to a friend’s this evening but promised she would be back before 10pm like normal.”

“Alright, sweetheart. See you later.” Joel said as he continued to eat his breakfast.

You long had a crush on Joel, from the moment he first met you in the QZ, you were hooked. He helped teach you how to fight, shoot and even hunt. There had been brutal moments outside the world of the QZ’s and Joel had saved you multiple times. There had also been those unspoken moments between you both where a touch on your hand as he helped you aim maybe lingered a second too long or his gaze fixated on you as you changed, when he thought you weren’t looking. You just assumed he never made a move on you due to your obvious age-gap, you assumed he always kinda looked at you like a kid. The age-gap seemed like such a trivial thing since the whole world ended but you never pushed your luck as you know you needed Joel to get by and actually live.

—

Your shifts went by quick and by the time you finished you were sweaty and in need of a long, hot shower and maybe, just maybe, you could get five minutes alone to scratch the burning itch under your skin.

“Joel, you home yet?” You called as you stepped into the home, no lights were on so you assumed maybe he was already in bed. Joel worked different shifts and so, nothing was really a surprise with him anymore.

There was no answer, just silence, you thanked the god’s above and all but ran upstairs, you turned the shower on to warm up and within minutes there was hot water filling the space. You underdressed yourself quickly and stepped into the water, the second the warm water hit your skin, you sighed with relief.

You soaped up your body and it didn’t take long for your fingers to explore your body and to slip between your slicked folds; a soft moan fell from your lips as your fingers circled your sensitive clit. You worked yourself quicker as your orgasm neared, you were so deep in the moment.

“Joel,” You whimpered as your eyes were closed and you worked your fingers faster. Your naked chest heaved as your ragged breaths ripped through your parted mouth. “So good, please. More.” You whined to yourself.

You had fully allowed yourself to delve into your fantasies; normally someone was always hope and you had to keep quiet whenever you masturbated. So when you had the house to yourself, you allowed yourself to be louder and enjoy it more.

Joel got home, he immediately saw lights on and heard the water running upstairs. He didn’t think anything of it and went to the fridge to grab himself a drink. That’s when he heard his name, he put his drink down and wandered upstairs, he didn’t make a lot of noise but he wasn’t exactly being sneaky either.

He saw your body, well, the back of your body at least; his hungry eyes raked over your naked form and they stopped at your ass. That’s when he heard you whimper again and he realised what you were doing. Which meant… no. You were thinking of him?!

Joel went to knock on the door, to politely announce he was home. Anything, but he couldn’t bring himself to and he certainly could held the way his cock hardened in his jeans at the thought of your cumming around your fingers whilst you thought of him.

His mouth went dry and gingerly he knocked on the door frame which caused your whole body to jump and you almost slipped in the bathtub.

“What the fuck?! Why are you watching me?!” You yelped and you saw Joel stood there, his eyes raked over your body before he looked around the room and avoided making eye contact with you. You brought your arms to try and cover some of your body.

“I uh, sorry darlin’. Heard my name and thought you called for me, I, uh, I get what you were doing now…” he said quietly and your cheeks turned a deep crimson.

“Joel,” you gasped. “I-I’m so sorry I — I thought no one was home and I was just, well, y’know what I was doing. I’m so embarrassed. I’m sorry.” You mumbled and switched off the water. You grabbed your towel off the ground and wrapped it around your body tightly.

Joel finally looked at you and this time he couldn’t help but smile, a boyish grin spread across his features and you wanted to punch him for being so smug.

“What?! What are you smiling about?” You whined, still embarrassed.

“Oh it’s nothing just… you want me to help you out, sweet girl. Show you what a real orgasm feels like?” Joel said lowly, the smug expression still on his face. Never before had he allowed himself to indulge in the lust he felt for you, until now; there you were, your hair was damp and your body glistened as the water droplets slid down every beautiful curve of your body.

“Oh fuck you, this,” you gestured up and down your body and between the two of you. You stepped out of the bathtub on shaky legs. “This isn’t something you get to take the piss about, okay? You can forget about that!” You hissed as you went to push past Joel. This was beyond humiliating and you didn’t need him to remind you of it or hold it above you as some kind of joke.

You tried to leave the room and Joel simply grabbed your wrist, before you could open your mouth he had you pushed up against the wall and was kissing you passionately. It was hot and heavy, your teeth clashed and your tongues met with a moan from you. Your hand found its way into Joel’s salt and pepper hair as his hands rested on your hip.

“Joel,” you mumbled, barely breaking the kiss between you both. “We shouldn’t, I mean. What about Ellie, what if she comes home? It’ll mess everything up.” You whispered, your breaths short as Joel peppered soft kisses to your jaw.

“With all due respect, darlin’… how about you shut up and let me show you how good a real man can make you feel.” Joel breathed, his lips hovering just by your ear.

His words, his lips, his breath; it was entirely all too much and not enough and it had your body quivering under him.

“Already shaking for me and I’ve not touched you, sweet girl.” He growled lowly in your ear and you shook your head in disagreement. “Bedroom. Now.” He commanded and you obediently left the bathroom and entered your own bedroom.

You stood awkwardly near the bed, you didn’t exactly have heaps of experience in the bedroom and the experience you did have was usually late at night and with someone you didn’t care for, where the other person was more interested in chasing their release rather than helping you get yours. Joel walked into the room and smirked at you, god, he was so infuriating with his arrogance.

“Let’s take this off, shall we?” Joel asked softly and held the edge of your towel, he tugged it off and it fell to the floor with a dull thud. You felt exposed and vulnerable as Joel’s hungry eyes drank you in; he was trying to memories every dip of your body, every freckle, every single hair and he wanted this image to replay every night in his head for the rest of his life. “Fuck. So beautiful, look at you.” He cursed, closing the space between you once more to kiss you again.

He walked you both back until your back fell flat on your bed, you whimpered helplessly under him as you felt his weight on top of you. His large hand came up to knead the soft skin of your breast before his fingers took your nipple and twisted it gently, your back arched off the bed at his actions and you whined under the older man.

“That’s it. Good girl, that feel good?” Joel asked and let his head duck down to envelope your sensitive nipple into his mouth, his tongue flicked over the bud and you moaned softly.

“Want you to take your clothes off.” You gasped out as your hands clutched at Joel’s grubby shirt. He released your nipple with a pop of his mouth and sat back to remove his shirt.

Your mouth went dry at the sight, you had seen Joel shirtless before but you had never been able to truly appreciate it. He had a little chest hair and his torso was delicately peppered with various scars, all of them ranging in size and intensity. He locked eyes with you as he stood to undo his belt and jeans, he kicked off the heavy denim and you couldn’t deny the way you clenched around air; you could see the outline of Joel’s cock, it was heavy and thick.

“Like what you see?” He laughed and grabbed his length through the thin fabric of his boxers. You nodded and shamelessly you let your thighs open further for him. “Good girl.” He cooed as he admired the site of your glistening cunt.

Joel wasted no more time and he was back on the bed with you, this time just dressed in his boxers. He positioned himself next to you, one leg draped over your to keep legs spread and teasingly, he trailed two fingers through your wet folds. You whimpered under him, spreading your legs further again. Joel laughed above you, he was watching your features as he let his fingers tease you for the first time. Your back arched slightly and your breaths became more ragged.

“Please,” you whined, your voice high pitched and needy. “Please don’t tease me, Joel.”

He laughed, again, he laughed and your body thrummed with anger as his fingers moved agonisingly slow before they fell to your clit and he circled that sensitive area just perfectly. You moaned, it was a loud noise and it shocked you as it was ripped from your throat. You threw your head back and your fingers gripped the sheets beneath you until they turned white.

“Nice and wet for me, hm? That all for me? I heard you moaning my name like a good little slut in the shower.” Joel groaned as his fingers got coated in your slick arousal.

He started a punishing pace and already, you felt the white heat in your stomach start to bubble aggressively. Joel leant up to admire your features once more, he loved the way your eyes fluttered shut every time he would move his fingers just so. Just as your body tensed, Joel teasingly changed the tempo of his movements and he could see the frustration that settled in your eyes but with that smug smirk on his lips again, he plunged two thick fingers into your tight hole and let his thumb stroke circles around your clit.

The noise you made was sinful, it almost didn’t sound human. Joel laughed, it was low and breathy and he felt so proud he was the one to elicit these filthy noises from you. He pulled his fingers out just to plunge them in deeper, only this time, he curled them upwards and it had you seeing stars. You felt lightheaded as you screwed your eyes shut and bit down onto your bottom lip.

“Think you can cum for me? Cum all on my fingers?” Joel asked and tenderly stroked some stray strands of wet hair from your face. “That’s it,” he cooed as he kept his fingers deep in you to stroke against the sensitive spot deep in your walls.

You were broken, already. Completely and utterly broken as Joel’s fingers ripped an orgasm from deep within you. Your back arched higher off the old mattress and your fingers clawed at Joel’s arm. No man had made you cum like this before.

You came heavily around Joel’s digits, your walls fluttered and clenched around him as he worked you through your first proper orgasm with another male.

“That’s it. Good girl,” he cooed softly into your ear as he sped his fingers back up. “You reckon you can cum again?” He asked and you looked at him with your lust-blown eyes and nodded silently, your lips still parted in pleasure.

Joel’s thumb drew circles around your clit and every so often he would swipe it directly over the little bud of nerves that had you whimpering under him. Your fingernails dug into the skin of Joel’s shoulder and in their wake, you left crescent moon shapes. Joel groaned at the sting of your fingers nails and it only encouraged him to work his own fingers in you deeply.

“Anyone ever eaten this little pussy?” Joel asked in a low tone, he pulled his fingers out of you and placed a light slap to your sensitive area. You yelped loudly and squeezed Joel’s arm.

You shook your head no and shivered under Joel’s watchful gaze, you couldn’t speak, you didn’t trust your voice to make the correct noises as you knew what was about to happen and it made your body ache with anticipation.

Joel kissed your mouth once before he trailed kisses down your stomach, it caused it to heave under his soft touches; his rough facial hair tickled across your skin. Joel took your thighs into his hands and pulled them so they draped over his shoulders, fully exposing your wet pussy to him. His mouth watered at the site and he couldn’t wait to taste every inch of you.

Joel wasted no more time, he parted your folds with his fingers before he delved his tongue into your wet heat. He couldn’t hold back the deep groan that rumbled up his throat, he had longed to taste you and have you gasping under him.

“So sweet,” he whispered as he slurped up your arousal. His tongue flicked over your clit and you gripped into his thick hair roughly. “That’s it, use my face, just like that, atta girl. Keep doing that.” Joel groaned as you greedily chased your high again on his face. He attached his lips onto your clit and suckled on it softly, his tongue rhythmically flicked over it.

“Go-gonna cum again!” You groaned. You looked down at Joel below you and it had you clenching around nothing, you longed to be filled as you came hard. His hair was a mess and his eyes were drooped shut as he ate your pussy like a man starved of food. “I-I want you in me. Need to feel your cock in me.” You whimpered as Joel flicked his tongue over your sensitive body.

“Yeah? You think you can cum again on my cock? How about you ride me, need to make sure you get all the orgasms you need, good girl.” He purred, standing up to stroke his cock after he removed his boxers. His length bobbed against his stomach when he removed his boxers. Your pussy fluttered with arousal as you watched his hand pass over his length a few times; none of the men you had been with were as big as Joel. He wasn’t just long, he was thick as well and you couldn’t wait to feel the stretch of him inside of you.

Joel climbed onto your bed so his back was against your pillows and he was half sitting up, he continued to stroke himself as you watched. You were strung out on the intense orgasms already and you weren’t sure how you were supposed to have it in you to ride his large dick. He held a hand up and made a ‘come hither’ gesture with his fingers, you sucked in a deep breath and moved your body up to his. You swung your legs over Joel’s lap to straddle him and he took his cock and passed it through the wetness of your pussy.

You shivered and gripped at Joel’s chest below you, your fingers combed through the light dusting of hair there. He pressed the tip of his fat cock to your wet hole and held your hips tightly as he brought you down on him. You moaned weakly as he bottomed out so you were sat in his lap, there was a faint sting as you adjusted to him.

“Bet you can feel me in your stomach, can’t you?” He purred, his fingers stroked soft patterns in the skin of your hips. He took one hand and gently stroked at your clit once again which caused you to grind down onto Joel’s length. He moaned at that and his head lulled back; you were so wet, so warm and just so tight. He knew he was the first one to split you open like that. “Such a tight. little. cunt.” Joel growled, his hips bucking up to fuck into you.

“So good.” You breathed as you started to bounce in his lap. “Feels so good. You’re so big.” You whimpered, with each bounce down, Joel thrusted up to meet you and it sent delicious shockwaves through your body. Your skin felt impossibly tight and too small for you and the burn in your stomach flickered furiously.

“That’s it. Atta girl, use my cock. Make yourself cum on me.” He growled, his thumb swiped over your clit once again which ripped a loud moan from your parted lips. As you bounced on his cock, your breasts heaved with the effort and your breaths came out of your mouth ragged and laboured.

“Can’t cum again, t-too much.” You whined and it was true, your body felt entirely too sensitive and everything almost felt too good, it took you by surprise since you weren’t ever aware that you could feel this good.

That’s all Joel needed, something animalistic switched in the pit of his stomach and with that, he had lifted your body to flip you onto your stomach. Your face pressed into the mattress with the force and he grabbed your hips roughly, pulling your ass up into the air for him. Joel brought a hand down and spanked the soft skin roughly.

He shoved his cock back into your wet heat with a groan and his balls slapped forward onto your clit. You whimpered pathetically and tried to grab at the sheets below you for leverage as Joel built up a rough pace.

“I said,” he accentuated the words with a rough thrust. “Cum on my cock, you wanted to been shown what it was like to cum properly. So cum for me.” Joel growled, his voice was dark and commanding.

Tears filled your eyes and soon there was a wet patch under your face on your sheets; you weren’t entirely sure whether it was from your tears or the saliva that pooled from your mouth.

“Touch yourself and cum on my cock.” You commanded bluntly and you obeyed, you snaked a hand under your stomach and rubbed at your clit with fervour. This angle caused Joel’s cock head to bump against that spot deep within yourself. You were soon cumming around Joel’s cock with a scream, you felt a gush and Joel was groaning behind you. “That’s it. Good girl, cum on me. Soak me.” He cooed and slapped your ass, softer this time so he could knead the skin.

You whimpered as you worked through your orgasm, your eyes screwed tightly shut and your walls fluttered around Joel’s cock as you came down from your high. He didn’t give you a second to recover as he pulled out and flipped you over so he could see your face.

“I wanna see your pretty little face when I fuck my seed into your greedy little hole.” Joel groaned, he tapped his cock against your sensitive clit and you quivered under him. You weren’t sure you could take much more, never had you felt so pleasured in your life.

Joel teasingly slow pushed his length into you once again and your eyes fluttered shut at the feeling. He didn’t reach as deep in this position but you could feel every single inch as he slid in. He rolled his hips to meet yours and he groaned with each pass of your tight pussy.

“Want me to fill you up? What if I fuck a baby into you? You want that. Wanna get all round with my seed?” He growled and it made your walls clench around him, he smirked at the reaction and toyed with your abused clit. “I think you can give me one more, little girl. I think you can gush on my cock whilst I fuck my cum into you.”

You couldn’t believe the words Joel was saying, you were sure it just ‘in the moment’ but you still couldn’t believe the filth that fell from his dirty mouth. You shook your head no at Joel and he just barked a laugh at you.

“I’m sure I’ll get another out of you,” he whispered and leant down to kiss at your breasts once again. “Bet this is what you thought of in the shower, isn’t it? Bet you thought of my cock splitting you open as I fuck you. I’ve thought about it, baby girl. Fucked my hand so many times imagining it was your tight little pussy. God this is so much better than I imagined. You’re so good for me, taking me so well.” Joel praised with a gutteral groan, his hips were slower as he worked himself closer to his own relief. He was surprised it he lasted as long as he did, it had been a while since he had been with a woman and that was mainly down to you. Anytime he was with someone else he imagined it was you he was filling up.

“Come on, please give me one more. Just one.” Joel purred, his mouth sloppily licking at your hardened nipples.

It was too much; his words, his hand, his mouth on your nipples and his cock filling you so deliciously. You didn’t think you could but it happened again; you clenched around Joel once more, his hips stalled and he thrust deep inside of you as you’re tightened around him. The room was filled with your laboured breathing and Joel’s soft pants as he filled you with his seed. You whined as you felt the hot liquid coat your inner walls.

Joel laid there for a few seconds as he gained his composure once again and he rolled off your body, and slid out of you with a grimace and he winced. Your body shuddered as you laid there, completely fucked out and drunk on the older male’s cock.

You weren’t sure how long had passed but when you finally found the strength in your body to get up and go to the bathroom, it was pitch black outside, your room was illuminated softly with a distant spotlight. You pulled Joel’s shirt on as it was the only clothes readily to hand and you couldn’t help but smile as you saw his sleeping face, and for once, he looked peaceful. You tiptoed out of your room and headed to the bathroom, just as you stepped inside and turned the light on a figure appeared in the doorway of Ellie’s room.

“Gotcha!” She giggled as you held your chest from the shock.

“Ellie!” You hissed. “You almost scared me to death. Go back to bed, it’s late.” You scolded.

“Why are you wearing Joel’s shirt?” She asked with a knowing smirk.

“Oh I, uh…” You mumbled, trying to think of the words on your feet.

“I’m fuckin’ with ya… I came home earlier and well, let’s just say I’m glad the weather was alright for me to walk around the block a few times.” Ellie laughed although you could see the faint disgust on her features.

You held back a choked laugh and brought your hand up to your mouth. “Ellie, I’m so sorry.. we, I mean, we’re so sorry. We didn’t wann—“ you rambled nervously and she held a hand up and waved it dismissively.

“Eh, it’s whatever. I’ve seen the way you two practically eye-fuck each other anyway. I’m surprised it took old man Miller this long to make a move on you. Glad you got a decent orgasm though.” Ellie laughed with a shrug. “Goodnight, Y/N. Let Joel know I’m home safe.” She smirked and disappeared back into her room.

You sat on the edge of the bathtub and held the backs of your cool hands to your burning cheeks. You couldn’t quite believe that today had happened, and of course it ended exactly like that. You laughed quietly to yourself and got yourself up with shaky legs. After finishing up in the bathroom, you went back to your room and crawled into your bed and you drifted to sleep with the soft sounds of Joel’s snores.

You braced yourself on the edge of the bathtub and held your burning cheeks in your cool hands, you couldn’t quite believe that conversation just happened and Ellie had heard the two of you earlier.

You were just grateful she didn’t seem pissed or upset about it. Maybe things were going to work out all okay in the long run. However they panned out, you were just so relieved you finally were able to have a decent orgasm, or multiples, at the hands of another man. For the first time in a long time, you slept soundly as you listened to the low rumble of Joel’s snores.

#joel miller #joel x reader #joel miller x reader #joel tlou #joel miller smut #anon request #thanks anon <3

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asterias-record-shop · 11 months

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mommy kink dave lizewski please and thank you ? 😋 i love your work sm and would be so happy if you decided to write this !!!! 💓😖

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— make me a mommy

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𓆩[main masterlist]𓆪 𓆩[request/ask me something!]𓆪

Nympho! Reader who never wants to stop having sex after her and Dave take each other’s virginity and wants him to get her pregnant so they can start their family early. **also, lactating can start as early in a pregnancy as a few weeks

“Dave, stop it!” You whine, tugging on his shirt as he leaned over the table looking at ads that were put out saying ‘NOW HIRING’ in big letters. “We bought a house and daddy’s covering the bills for a year, you don’t need to work!”

We didn’t buy a house, your family bought a house for you both to live in. You were a daddy’s girl, and whatever you wanted, your father was surely going to get it for you no matter how much of a dent it put into his extremely deep pockets. Your father didn’t necessarily like Dave, but he didn’t necessarily dislike him either - he just wanted you to be happy.

Dave wanted you to be happy too, he really did, or he wouldn’t have proposed right after graduation. He was looking for a job so that he didn’t live up to your family's expectations of being a horrible person for you to marry. Dave truly did want you to be happy with him, and make sure your parents loved him just as much as you did - not in the same way though, of course.

"I'm almost done, baby, let me just put in this application in." Dave mumbled, inhaling as you slowly came behind him, rubbing his shoulders as you pressed soft kisses to his neck.

"Come on baby, we have stuff to get to remember? I'm ovulating and I found positions for us to try because missionary gets boring," you whispered, your hands pushing down his shirt as you looked over his shoulder at the applications. "You as a firefighter would be pretty hot."

"I don't know about that, honey," he whispered back with a sigh. "You got to go to school and training and whatever."

"What about that?" You suggest, tapping the position for an IT technician. "My daddy said they need one at his company. He can get you a good salary."

Dave shook his head, sighing. "No baby, I don't want any more handouts from your dad. I think a weapons dealer would be hot, don't you?"

You laughed, shaking your head as you tapped another square about the military. "What about that?"

"How would I be able to do that-"

"You being Kick-Ass and not having pain sensors in most of your body," you responded, giggling. "Come on, I would make an amazing military wife. Now put those up..." you pushed the magazines to the side, humming. "And come put a baby in me."

Dave swallowed as you grabbed his wrist, tugging him to your shared room as easily opened the door before jumping on the bed. "So, the article said that if I leaned over the bed a little bit, the sperm will find its way past the cervix quicker because of gravity. Do you think that's true?"

Dave blushed, shrugging. "I-I mean... gravity is real?"

You giggled, sitting up only to slip off your clothes before your stomach started to twist. You burped softly, covering your mouth before rushing to the bathroom and leaning over the toilet. You groaned loudly as you vomited into the toilet, Dave immediately following you and pulling back your hair while holding your shoulder.

For fucks sake, was this it?

When you finally stopped, he passed you a water bottle he got from your shared bedroom, watching as you swashed the water in your mouth before gurgling it and spitting it out. "David, give me a test."

"Y-Yes ma'am," he pulled out the drawer, grabbing you one of the tests as you stood and flushed the toilet, quickly doing your business and cleaning yourself up before flushing and pacing. "Y/N, honey, it's going to be okay."

"I want to be pregnant, Dave," you whisper, inhaling as you push back his hair. "I want to be pregnant with your baby, want to have so many babies with you. I want to be a mommy, Dave."

"You'll be an amazing mommy," Dave assured you, holding your hips as he stared down at your tits. They were already fuller; you had said that lactation can start as early as three weeks after talking to your gynecologist. "Such an amazing mommy."

You paused, looking down at your tits with a slight smile. "Do you want to see if it's... happening?"

He blushed, shaking his head. "I-I don't... I don't think that's right, honey."

"Why does it matter? They're not born yet, they don't need it," you whisper, smiling as you looked back. "Shall we see if it's true?"

"Of course."

You turned around and gasped, squealing. "I'm pregnant!"

Holy shit.

You jumped into his open arms, giggling as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, Dave spinning you around in excitement. "We're going to be parents! You're going to be a mommy, holy shit," Dave laughed as you stroked his cheeks. "You're going to be the most amazing mommy ever."

"And you're going to be the best daddy ever," you giggled, smiling as his hands ghost the sides of your tummy, eyes trained on your pretty tits. "Want to see if it's happening? We could celebrate with it."

"What, are you going to be my mommy too?" He teased, watching as your cheeks started to tint, smiling down at him. "Oh."

"Well come on. I'm going to be a mommy soon, I should get used to someone calling me that."

Maybe that's how you got here, Dave sucking on your tits as his hips rutted uncontrollably against yours, desperate to be deeper inside of you. "F-Fuck mommy, fuck, you taste so good, I need more."

You were so out of it, your hips unconsciously bucking into his in desperation to cum, to get that high as his hands paw at your tits, squeezing and letting his thumbs glide over your nipples. "I-It's early, Dave, maybe there's not much!"

He had been sucking and pinching, making you cum at least three times just from his work on your tits, oversensitivity flooding your entire body. Every thrust he made had you seeing white, every slide of his thumbs along your hard, pebbled nipple making your eyes roll back, each drag of his cock along your walls and his tip hitting what felt like your cervix.

"You said constant stimulation will make it produce more, right? Please, please mommy, I need more," he groaned, cursing when none was squeezed out of your tit. "Fuck!"

"D-Dave, there's no more, fuck! Just wait, wait a few minutes." You whimpered, staring down at your swollen nipples, gasping when he pulled it back into his mouth.

"Just a little longer, mommy? Please?"

You inhaled, sighing. "Okay."

What kind of mom would you be if you said no, hm?

Taglist: 𓆩[@lem0ns77]𓆪 𓆩[@cecepop15]𓆪 𓆩[@memeorydotcom]𓆪 𓆩[@your-favorite-god]𓆪 𓆩[@xyzstar]𓆪 𓆩[@just-my-shit]𓆪 𓆩[@your-mom21]𓆪 𓆩[@c78r]𓆪 𓆩[@dizscreams]𓆪 𓆩[@copypastedaphne]𓆪 𓆩[@asrt5]𓆪 𓆩[@xoxomoonlightbabe]𓆪 𓆩[@f-aggotry]𓆪

#asterias-record-shop #with love asteria ♡#kick-ass #kick ass #dave lizewski #dave lizewski x reader #aaron taylor johnson #dave lizewski imagine #dave lizewski x you #dave lizewski smut #dave lizewski x fem! reader #dave lizewski x fem! reader smut

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lxvvie · 4 months

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y'all, I made the mistake of revealing that I write fanfiction as a hobby, and when asked about the fandoms I write for, I broke it down as I know best: into cliques. I realize I might be shaking the table but it is what it is.

This is what I said for CoD (I've since add some more stuff):

You got the forever war between Gaz Nation and Gaz Deniers. May or may not be rooted in his attractiveness as a person of color, opinions vary (read: it most definitely is). Bonus points if the racism comes out in full force. DOUBLE/TRIPLE those points if it's expressed using butchered ass AAVE. 🥴

You got the Masked Men Lovers Brigade of which König, Ghost, and Keegan are the patron saints and arguably the holy trinity.

You got the Peepaw Price Lovers who absolutely adore his chonky cheeks, peepaw mannerisms, lumberjack body complete with the slutty waist, and relative long-suffering thanks to the shenanigans of the rest of the crew.

You got the Soap Suds who, I think, have found that relative balance between Johnny being a destructive-as-all-hell force to be reckoned with and the quintessential golden retriever boyfriend. His VA doesn't make it any better apparently lmao.

You got the Ghost lovers who've pretty much diversified him so he can run the gamut of Daddy Dom Extraordinaire™, Babygurl™, Sassy Simon™, and the list is endless. What IS consistent is that someone parked a dump truck on that ass and he has some big ole titties. There's also the subset of people who REALLY, REALLY love Ghost but also think his VA is ugly (which he isn't) while simultaneously thinking that he (Ghost) is supposed to be David Gandy levels of immaculate despite being in active combat. Make it make sense.

There's the Gravediggers who, for the most part, acknowledge their love-hate relationship with Graves and I think that is both hilarious and endearing.

You have the Kult of Köthulhu, König's devoted followers who have allowed him to transcend his gremlin nature to become the long-lost progeny of Cthulhu. Move the fuck over, Cthylla. I kid but he, like Ghost, has also been diversified in terms of his portrayal. And no, he's not a part of 141. Some followers of His Gremliness are also embroiled in a forever war with Gaz Nation so please be safe out there, y'all.

You got the Valeria girlies who want her to sit on their faces. I don't blame them. Please do.

You have the Los Vaqueros crew who need more love shown to them and Pony by Ginuwine is their official theme song thanks to Alejandro Thee Stallion. The less said about the butchered Spanish I've read in some fics, the better.

There's also the Farah Fanatics who rightfully adore her and deserve their flowers just like the rest of the cliques.

There's the Keller Kollective who, I think, tends to intersect with the Farah Fanatics. This lot also deserves their flowers because Keller is a sub absolutely underrated as a character. You'd also be forgiven for thinking he and Price are elated.

You also got the Horangi Horde who, just like Gaz Nation, will RISE TF UP. I think. Hopefully. lmao

And then there's the self-righteous crew who, for whatever reason, seem to think they're above it all and love to police writers on what they write and how they write the characters (we're talking in terms of rather innocuous subjects in the grand scheme of things; the sus shit absolutely needs to be and should be called out). Interestingly enough, this group also seems to forget that they're in the same damn boat by being in the fandom, consuming, and writing about the same characters. The ones who have all the energy but none of the courage even if they say or think they do. Bonus points if they also move like fans. Double/Triple those points if they, too, also use butchered-ass AAVE to make their points. 🥴

The girlies who can't separate fiction from reality and insist on harassing the VAs and their significant others and families because how DARE they have a regular degular life outside of *checks notes* their job. Baby, it was never gonna be you. It will never. be. you.

did I get them all? lmao

#2queued4u.#cod fandom #call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty modern warfare 3 #call of duty ghosts #call of duty modern warfare 2 #cod modern warfare #cod mw2 #cod mw3 #task force 141 #los vaqueros #kortac #it reads much better as a post because I sounded a hot mess and was flustered as I was explaining it but this was the gist of it lmao.

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iamasaddie · 5 months

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webcam for beginners

paring: Dave York x f!Reader rating: explicit (18+ minors DNI) word count: 3,7k~ warnings: power imbalance (boss/employee); age gap (reader mid to late 20s, Dave 45); mutual pining; f and m masturbation; a hint of voyeurism; dirty talk; not proof/beta read sorry; no use of y/n. let me know if I missed anything a/n: a very special thank you to @noxturnalpascal for helping fellow sulking writers get out of the writing slump with this prompt/excersise! It definitely helped because i was stuck for more than two weeks unable to put out anything but a couple of fruitless ideas, but this I banged out in a day and now i feel so much motivation to continue writing it's insane! thank you hottie ily and you're honestly the purest gem of a human being <3

PROMPT: Pick a Pedge Daddy character - Joel Miller, Frankie Morales, Dave York, etc. (it can be Canon or Non-Canon/AU/No Outbreak). PPCU Daddy is surprised - and excited - to learn that the grad/postgrad student he hires to watch his child sometimes also works as a: stripper/dancer/cam-girl/onlyfans-model/dating-or-escort-service (or straight-up SW)

*1000 word Minimum - 2000 word Maximum (yeh that one went splendid)

MY MAIN MASTERLIST

“Would you mind if I get a side job, Mr. York?”

You had been meaning to start this conversation earlier, like a month ago and definitely not when your employer and the father of two adorable baby girls David York was running late after dealing with burnt toast and spilled coffee courtesy of his eldest daughter. You stopped him right as he was about to leave his house, his hand frozen halfway to the keys laying on the shelf.

“Why? Don’t I pay you enough?”

“No, no of course not.” You shook your head. The last thing you wanted was to appear greedy when he already was paying you more than any family on the upper-middle class filled street would. "It’s not about that. It’s just…” You tried to gather your thoughts together, every line that you rehearsed in front of the mirror abandoning your head. “You know, I wasn’t going to make babysitting my whole profession, and since this is the last summer before I graduate, I’d love to have something remote so I could save up and take care of myself further on… I understand if that’s not something you… I just, it’s not even a job right now, I’d just take courses to get into the job and I can take those when the kids are asleep so it won’t affect them at all! You know I wouldn’t let anything affect them.”

“Jesus, dear, relax.” Dave listened to you patiently, finally placing both of his big hands on your shoulders, grounding you. He laughed merrily, and you felt a wave of embarrassment, hiding your eyes from his prying browns. “I can’t even get a word in. And I’d really like to because the word is yes, of course. You’ve been nothing but helpful these past months, and I am very appreciative of the fact that you warn me beforehand. Not that I thought you’d stay our babysitter forever, however pleasant the prospect is.”

Your eyes widened, surprise and happiness fighting for a place in the depth of them. "Really? You don’t mind?” You never thought Mr. York would full on refuse or fire you, but the fact that he let you do this freely without cutting your salary or suggesting you find a different time for this made your heart swell with joy. This man was a treasure, and he reminded you about that once again.

“No, I don’t. As long as girls get the same amount of your attention, you have the green light from me.”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you Mr. York!” You didn’t even try to stop the urge to throw your arms around that man, jumping a little and almost squealing how grateful you were, chills erupting under your skin when you felt him return the innocent gesture and engulf your body with his arms and fresh smell.

He came back early that day, knowing that the girls were probably having their daytime nap, but excited at the prospect of spending his first evening in weeks with them together, as a family. Maybe he could even persuade you to stay for dinner. He scratched his chin, thinking if you’d be more inclined to stay if he ordered Chinese or Mexican, when he stumbled over one of the toys girls must have dropped. In an attempt to not fall, Dave spread his arms, grabbing the coat rack and steadying himself, but letting the rucksack that was hanging from it fall. He cursed under his breath, hoping that the noise didn’t wake his daughters, and crouched down to gather all the things that spilled from obviously your bag. He recognized the familiar items from your bag and held up a lipstick, smiling at the memory of Alice begging you to put it on her. You agreed, and he went to work with a tiny lipstick stain his baby girl left on his cheek when she said goodbye. He shoved most of the things inside, still reminiscing, when a bright book cover caught his attention. The title on the book cover read “Webcam for Beginners: A Step-by-Step Guide” . Confused about why you might have bought a book about webcams, Dave felt a pang of unease. Before he could go any further with his assumptions, he decided to open a seemingly boring guide book. Your rucksack fell back to the floor when he saw the contents of the thing. Right in front of his eyes there were dozens of tips, graphs with specific angles, various body parts all to make this the best guide book for future cam girls.

Fuck.

His back was covered with sticky sweat as he put the book on the key shelf, the one that was too high for his girls to try and play with his keys. His steps were slow, as Dave was still thinking what he was supposed to do with it, if he was supposed to do anything at all. After all, you were a free woman with her body autonomy, and he was just a single dad with a shady job and an ex-wife who spent all her waking hours trying to ruin his life.

On autopilot, he walked up the stairs, opening his daughters’ bedroom without making any noise. They were sleeping peacefully, trading two separate beds to sleep hugging each other in one, Alice’s. Dave smiled, softly, his heart soaring with love for his girls, when he heard loud breathing. He wasn’t dumb, so he didn’t even wonder what those noises were or where they were coming from. He strode to the end of the hall to where the guest room was located. The door was just slightly ajar and he shook his head, disapproving both you and himself but for very different reasons.

Damn, you were beautiful. He shouldn’t be doing this. It was wrong, but once he got a first look at the beautiful expanse of your back, at the curve of your ass that he saw you tried to twist awkwardly this way and that so it looked better on the old laptop screen, he couldn’t be bothered with guilt.

Your attention was fully on the picture of yourself on the screen, and he couldn’t blame you, he wasn’t able to take his eyes off of you either. Dave felt his pants become tighter, his blue shirt most likely sported a big damp stain on his back both from the august heat and the unbearable strain of his arousal. He saw you lean back from the camera, opening your naked thighs and trying to lift them up to see if it looked better that way, but that meant that the mic would barely pick your beautiful breathy moans that you tried to keep on the quieter side for the sake of the girls, Dave figured. Your left hand supported your weight as your right were busy between your thighs.

“You should move your camera closer if you want them to hear and see what you sell.”

The speed with which you covered your bare body was so fast that Dave thought he glitched for a moment.

“Mr. York!” Your eyes were as wide as they could physically be, horror written all over your face. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

Dave let out a chuckle, striding into the room confidently and closing the door behind. “Aren’t you supposed to study for your new work?”

“I… Well, I,” you had nothing to tell him, no quick reply that could at least soften the blow. Nothing. And you were still very aware of your nakedness, even though you covered your front as much as you could, your back that faced the wall was still visible. Your old laptop created steady brown noise as the hard drive fought for its life with the editing and video recording app still going.

“You already were, weren’t you?” Dave slowly approached and sat down on a comfortable chair right in front of the bed. His dick was painfully hard for the last ten minutes since he had found that stupid book and imagined what you did with it.

“I’m sorry, I know how it looks, but I’m…”

He interrupted you with a hand gesture, “I don’t care what you choose to do with your body, dear. It’s yours for a reason, and I have no say. I’m no one to you.”

You felt both a relief and a sense of disappointment washing over you. Mr. York was right, he was no one to you, just a man with two adorable little daughters who paid you to look after them. He didn’t have to take the responsibility for your little crush on him. You smiled still, a warm happiness spreading all over your insides because you were right, and he wasn’t one of those conservative bastards. He respected your choice and he… Wait, why was he still in the room, his eyes not leaving your body, lips wet with a fresh coat of saliva from his tongue.

“Mr. York…”

“I’d like it very much if you called me Dave.”

You nodded, and started over.

“Dave, why are you still…” you finished your sentence by pointing your finger around the room.

“I thought I could help you,” he stated nonchalantly, manspreading his legs wide and letting you see the stiff outline of his cock even through the material. “I saw your little book,—”

"You what?”

“- on accident. Thought I might help you, since you did nothing but help me all these past weeks. I do know how a good cam girl can sell herself, from a buyer’s point of view.”

You felt another wave of heat washing over your body, but this time it was of a different origin. This man - this gorgeous, smart man - suggested you to help with… what exactly? You didn’t let yourself ponder about it too much, just agreeing to whatever he wanted to give you. Anything, even just a hungry gaze from him spiked your arousal harder than any porn you’d ever watched. Dave’s face twisted in a cocky smile, the one he gave you instead of saying ‘I told you so’, whenever he was right and you were wrong. The one that made you wanna kiss it off his face.

“How are you going to… help?” Embarrassment wasn’t a feeling you’ve experienced a lot, otherwise the choice of what you were about to do would’ve been the wrongest one ever, but somehow with him you felt like a virgin schoolgirl, despite being ten years older than one, and a dozen dicks more experienced.

“Well, for starters, I guess you’ll need to drop that blanket.”

Your throat bobbed, a thick glob of saliva barely passing down with how tense you were. There was nothing to be ashamed of, or shy about, but Dave… Goddamnit, it would be so much easier if you didn’t have a crush on him.

As if reading your hesitation right from your face, he put his wide palm on his crotch, pressing down a little.

“Would it be easier for you to show me yours if I showed you mine?”

You choked on air from his proposition, you wanted to see that man naked for as long as you can remember, sizing him up in his tight slacks and crisp shirts every time he went away for work. Going as far as coming thirty minutes earlier in hopes to see that man leaving the shower in a towel. God, you were such a creep, you cringed at yourself. Dave interpreted your face differently, his own coming from a hungry excitement to confusion and embarrassment?

“We don’t have to…” He placed both his hands on the arms of the chair preparing to stand up and leave, but you didn’t let him, dropping the material that covered your body and exposing yourself to him.

“No, no, no! I want to.” You hurried to give him the most pleading face you could manage, “I really want to. I wanted for a while, actually.”

The smirk returned in his face as quickly as it went away, and he was back in the role of the leader, someone with control. “Really?”

Instead of replying, you spread your legs, showing off your bare glistening pussy, that was now more wet than after you played with it.

“Oh, fuck. Well, that’s a good start, baby.”

You almost moaned as you heard him calling you baby. You’d had dreams in which he would pound into your pussy with abandon and call you baby, his baby. Your hand traveled from the column of your neck to the valley between your breasts, sliding left and pinching the hard bud of your nipple.

Dave didn’t go down on his promise, making a quick work of his pants and reaching out to pull his cock through the slit on his boxers.

Oh, how fucking gorgeous his cock was. You felt your mouth competing with your pussy over who would produce more wetness at the sight of his beautiful thick shaft topped with a fat tip that was just a little grittier than the rest of him. The red color of the head as well as the precum pooling in his slit told you that he’d been hard for a while now, and you felt proud for making him this aroused. Dave took his cock between the tips of his thumb and two fingers, bobbing it up and down and watching your eyes follow the movement, hypnotized by it. Emboldened by his openness, you felt every bit of hesitation drain from you. In that moment you were nobody but two beautiful bodies that desired pleasure, there was no room for shame.

“So what would sell me for you, Dave?”

His gaze darkened, brown of his eyes matching the wet stain of arousal that you left on the simple sheets. Dave licked his lips, his tongue slowing down on the plush lower one, and tightened the gip on his cock, not yet moving.

“Make sure that the camera catches how wet your pretty cunt is, and don’t be shy. At least, not too shy.”

“Doesn’t innocence sell?”

“Innocence in your voice and looks, not your actions, baby.” While the words settled in your brain, you tried to keep your hands away from your cunt, your entrance pulsing around emptiness, trying to suck anything in to fill you up. “Move the laptop, after all we’re learning the tricks of the trade here.”

You moved your old Lenovo from the edge of the bed to sit between your spread legs. You saw the reflection of your glistening folds on the screen, but made sure that you weren’t obscuring the view for Dave.

“Now touch her,” Dave’s command was barely audible, his voice hoarse and a bit strained. “Tell me how good she feels. I need to practically feel her on my fingers.”

“You can,” you whispered, transfixed on the image of your fingers trying to spread the slick lips of your pussy.

You didn’t see him nod, telling you that he understood your implication, “I can, but they can’t.”

Fuck, your head snapped up to look at Dave’s face, but stopped at his dick, his head almost purple with how violently he was choking it. You returned your gaze to the screen, thinking that you could come just from the image of Dave getting himself off.

“My pussy,” you started hesitantly, closing your eyes for a moment and letting yourself just feel through your fingertips. “She feels really, really good. So soft and,” your index and middle fingers started tracing the outer lips, sometimes slipping inside, teasing you, “and so wet.” Your fingers slipped on your wetness proving your words, and slid lower, where you felt desperately empty. “So wet my fingers just want to slip inside.”

You heard a distinct spitting sound, and lifted your eyes once again just in time to see Dave’s palm, wet with his saliva, close around the throbbing shaft of his cock. You bit your lip hard, like you were the one feeling Dave’s relief. The sting of the bite piercing your lip helped you return to reality, which was in no way worse than a dream. Your fingers slowly caressed your pussy, thumb circling your clit in long-learned movements that sent jolts of pleasure up your spine. The lewd sounds of you spreading your slick all around your lips and Dave’s hand stroking up and down his cock combined together, as your rapid breaths tried to tie up with them in a unique symphony.

Dave’s eyes never left your pussy. The angle wasn’t perfect, but he could see your dripping core illuminated by the light of the computer screen like it was the star of the show. No, it was the star of the show. Your beautiful, shining lips puffy and swollen with your teasing, your fingers slippery and your clit throbbing, begging. Dave’s eyes went dry and he forced himself to blink.

“Come on, baby, fuck yourself on those little fingers. I need to know how good she feels inside.”

You simply nodded, surprised to realize that this was exactly what you were waiting for, for him to tell you. Your fingers eagerly slipped inside, two at the same time, and your whimpers made you sound pathetic but pleased.

“Good girl,” Dave all but growled, his hand tightening around his head to stave off the embedding orgasm. He wasn’t romantic enough to calculate for you to come together, but he wanted you to come first at least. “Is she tight, baby? Is that pretty cunt hungry? I see her just sucking your fingers in like it’s nothing.”

You felt your body cover with a sheen of sweat like it was your second skin. You should’ve chosen a different position, or at least lean on the bedpost, but now there was no way you’d move so you had to keep your body up with one hand while letting the other one fuck into your pussy, with your legs spread as wide as the fucking horizon. Dave was right, your pussy welcomed your fingers with ease, it wasn’t the first time you filled her today, but you felt the disappointing lack of girth mentally comparing your slender digits with Dave’s meatier ones. Your brows knitted in frustration as you continued fucking your fingers into your squelching entrance.

“She’s so hot, and wet,” your words were interrupted by your own carefully quiet moans but you didn’t stop speaking. “So tight, but she would be tighter around yours.”

“Good job, baby,” David nodded, resuming the stroking of his cock, gentler this time. “Tell them, make them want to be there with you.”

“Fuck them, oh” you tried to push your fingers deeper and deeper, touch that exquisite spot, something you just knew Dave would do easily, but your fingers were not fit for that, “I’m talking about your fingers, Dave. They would feel so good inside me.” You almost cried, sweat from extortion and a single tear mixing together on your cheeks.

You saw York’s jaw clench as if he was physically in pain, “do you think you can handle these fat fingers, little thing?”

As soon as he said it, your eyes were glued to two of his fingers - index and middle - that he put up, holding them next to his lips and then giving them a slow wet suck.

Your body shuddered in a pre-orgasmic convulsion and you squeezed your eyes shut the image of him imprinted on your eyelids. “Yes, yes, I can, she can. She’d be so tight and wet for you, you’d spread her so wide with your fat fingers.”

“Show me,” he ordered, and you didn’t even think before falling on your back and squeezing two fingers of your other hand inside your pussy, spreading it apart and showing him the most hidden, and intimate part of yourself shamelessly. The air hit your heated core with cruel coldness, but you just accepted the wild contrast, making it excite your burning skin even more.

“Oh God, you perfect little thing, fuck yourself,” he prompted, his voice hurried and feverish, just like his movements, “fuck your wet little pussy with your fingers, come on.”

You would never be tired of obeying him, you thought, keeping just two of your fingers inside and letting the other hand caress your abandoned clit. Your movements became synchronized, no way to know who adjusted to who, but creating an illusion of something both of you silently wanted for some time now. You forced your eyes to open, moving your head so you could see Dave in the armchair looking back at you. All the words have been forgotten in the desperate chase for pleasure. Your eyes roamed each other dripping like raindrops from the disheveled hair, to furrowed in concentration brows, from wet lips to the dip in beneath the column of the neck, filling up with sweat; low low low to the moving hands, jealous of each other’s limbs and digits, internally begging to be their replacements. You wanted your whole body to become a vessel of Dave’s pleasure; he wanted to dive inside your cunt and suffocate in its wetness and warmth.

“Come on, baby,” he gritted through his teeth, “come for me, give it to me, come on.”

Both your hands sped up in an attempt to finally reach that peak, and no matter how unromantic David thought himself to be, your orgasms spilled out of you with less than a second of difference.

Your body convulsed with after-shocks while Dave hissed, letting go of his cock and closing his eyes for the first time this evening.

“The book was more helpful, but it was more fun with you.” You quipped joyfully, and Dave lifted his head that felt like it weighed at least a thousand pounds from the back of the chair, looking at you.

The smile that you directed at the ceiling was radiant, and he couldn’t contain one of his. Dave looked at your wasted body, and suddenly it was his turn to feel hesitant and shy. Still, he gathered the leftover composure and stood up, moving towards the bed where you still laid with your eyes closed and lips stretched with joy.

“Maybe we could put some of the tips to use, to see if they work?”

You opened your eyes, immediately finding his.

“I wouldn’t say no to that.”

please leave a comment if you liked what you read

#Dave York x reader #dave york x female reader #dave york x you #Dave York x y/n #pedro pascal fanfiction #dave york fanfiction #iamasaddie fic

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heartbreakprincehbk · 3 months

Text

Fool For You (David Von Erich x Reader x Kerry Von Erich)

Words: 4,046

Summary: A tale old as time; an angsty love triangle. Requested by @richiejerimovichh ! Thanks for being patient hun!

“Oh, finally. Y/N’s here!” You could hear in the distance as you walked up the long Von Erich dirt driveway. You already wore a grin on your face as you heard a scuffle of shoes approaching like a pack of wild animals.

It was hard to really explain how you found yourself as an unofficial member of the Von Erich clan. Really, it had more to do with vicinity; your parents knew Fritz and Doris and you went to the same school as all the brothers. You were at the Sportatorium for every show, like most of your old classmates, and even got a job there taking tickets after your senior year. That turned into becoming a member of the office, which turned into befriending the Von Erichs, which turned into late night burger joints and shakes and family dinners. Pretty soon, you were letting yourself into their home and getting greeted just like any other family member.

Mike had been the voice you heard, and the relief was evident all over his face; he and his brothers had been playing football and you were–hopefully–his way out.

“I’m so happy to see you.” He told you breathlessly, nearly falling into your arms. You laughed as you hugged him back, steadying him on his feet.

“This ain’t over yet, Mike.” Kevin warned, giving his brother a playful push so he could hug you in greeting next. “Dave and I ain’t done with you and Kerry yet. Hey, Y/N. Did you pick up a movie for movie night?”

“Kevin, movie night isn’t until a few more days. I’ve got time! Can’t you take it one day at a time like the rest of us?” You teased, making Mike laugh. “So, I see I’m just in time. Who’s winning?”

“Who do you think?” David was approaching quickly, a bright light in his eyes, eyes that were locked solely on you. Just the sight of him set a swarm of butterflies loose in your chest. “I sure am glad to see your pretty face. It’s a sight for sore eyes around here.” He said just before he swept you up into a hug that brought you off your feet.

Where to start with David…and where did it end?

Kevin was like the older brother you always wanted, always keeping you dutifully on your toes and there for you with advice when you needed it. Mike was like the baby brother you always wanted, and he looked to you for the advice and comfort. It was the best of both worlds. But David…

David was just so funny and charismatic. He had a quiet assuredness to him that you always admired. So, the fact that he always seemed to have his eyes on you made your heart skip a beat. The passenger’s seat in his truck was your designated seat; he wouldn’t let anyone else have it. If ever you and his brothers went anywhere, it was unspoken that you were riding with him. He saved you a seat at the dinner table next to him, his coat was the one offered if you got chilly.

And yet, despite all of that, despite him constantly driving you home and spending any spare chance he got in your office while you worked, that seemed to be all it was. Sure, there were lingering looks. His hand touching yours a second too long. He had drunkenly kissed your cheek an inch from your mouth one night, but any solid admittance of romantic feelings? There was none.

So were you wrong in thinking maybe there was more to it? Maybe. Did it stop you from hoping? Not a chance. And if that made you foolish, then you were the biggest fool.

“You won’t be winning for long.” Another voice brought you out of your thoughts. You glanced over David’s shoulder and finally saw Kerry, who, curiously, also only eyed you.

“Shoot. Wanna bet, brother?” David said, almost reluctantly placing you back on the ground. Kerry approached you and gave you a tight hug, one that lingered longer than you were expecting.

“Hey, Y/N. Missed you.” He murmured softly, close to your ear. It sent a shiver up your spine.

“Hey, Kerry.” You replied, left mystified as he finally let go. The touch of his skin left yours tingling. You weren’t quite sure if you were imagining the glare on David’s features.

“Are you joining us, Y/N?” Mike asked hopefully. You managed to smile again, shaking off the last interaction.

“No, sorry, buddy. I’m gonna help your mom set up dinner. Kev, is Pam comin’?” Kevin nodded in the affirmative. You turned to Kerry. “What about Becky?”

Becky was Kerry’s most recent girlfriend. You had only met her once, the first time he had brought her around the family. She was beautiful, such a vibrant bubbly person that made you just want to be a better person. Kerry looked away at your question.

“Nah. We’re not together anymore.” His response was quiet. It felt like tripping into a hidden hole in the grass and you wished you hadn’t asked.

“Oh…I’m sorry to hear that.” You replied. Kerry now looked right at you, his eyes clear.

“Don’t be.” You blinked. Now, you were certain the glare on David’s face was real.

“C’mon! Less chit chat, let’s finish this game.” David interrupted gruffly. You left them to their game, chuckling a little at the exasperation on Mike’s face.

After dinner, once you finally convinced Doris to let you do the dishes and shooed off Pam to enjoy some of Kevin’s company, you were scrubbing plates in a comfortable silence.

“You know, it goes by faster if two people do it.” You gasped and dropped the plate you were holding into the suds and water.

“Kerry? Don’t scare me like that!” You scolded. He approached your side with a chuckle, leaning against the counter. “I’m all good, really. Don’t you and your brothers have a show to be preparing for?”

“Exactly. We’re leaving in an hour. You’re coming to watch, right?” You gave a nod. “Okay, so let’s get it done faster.” He pleaded with you with his eyes and you sighed.

“Fine. You dry. And you better be better than Mike at polishing these forks.” You warned. Kerry chuckled again.

“Yes, ma’am.”

Soon, the comfortable silence was back, this time with the addition of Kerry, his large arm touching yours as you both worked diligently. But soon, with each plate, you felt the urge to speak nearly consuming you.

“So,” you said finally after clearing your throat. “I know you said not to be, but I really am sorry about bringing up Becky. I had no idea.” You apologized. Kerry was shaking his head.

“I meant it, Y/N. No need to be sorry.”

“So, what happened? She was a really great girl.” Kerry shrugged.

“Yeah…I don’t know. As great as she was, she just wasn’t really the one.” You gave a small chuckle.

“Well, Kerry, you hardly gave her a chance. How would you know?” He paused, looking over at you.

“You just do sometimes. I didn’t feel that with her. She didn’t really like the wrestling part of everything, so it wouldn’t have worked in the long run…and…I guess I realized I was never going to be fair anyways.” You frowned.

“What do you mean?” He looked away, giving another shrug.

“I was always comparing her to someone else. And wishing I was with her instead.”

He looked at you again, putting the plate he was drying down and turning entirely to face you. You felt your words get caught in your throat and your heart speed up nervously.

“Oh, um…well.” You sputtered out. “A lot of guys make the mistake of not taking a leap and speaking up about how they feel.”

“I know.” Kerry replied. “I’ve seen it. I don’t wanna make the same mistake.” He continued to stare at you and you could’ve sworn he was moving closer.

“Hey, darling, should I wear the red and blue jacket tonight or the black and gold–” David had entered the kitchen and stopped short at the sight of Kerry next to you. You watched his eyes narrow. “What’s going on?”

“Oh, nothing. Just helping Y/N with the dishes. She shouldn’t do all the heavy lifting.” Kerry replied. You nearly elbowed him.

“No, and she doesn’t. That’s what I’m around for. I think Y/N’s capable enough of washing dishes without you slowing her down.” David replied.

“I really don’t mind!” You cut in, but the brothers continued to stare at each other. The tension in the air was growing thick. “It’s the least I can do for always free-loading around here.”

“It’s a little dumb of you to think a woman should wash the dishes, Dave.” Kerry challenged.

“I never said she should! I know she’s her own person and better than anyone, I know she doesn’t need anyone’s help for anything. She’s not some helpless doll, and the last thing she needs is your help.”

“Just because she doesn’t need it doesn’t mean she should always have to do it on her own.”

“I’d gladly wash the dishes for her if she asked me too, you’re putting words in my mouth! Who’s the one always making sure she gets a plate full of food first or opening the door for her? Who picks up lunch for her every day of the week while she’s working so she doesn’t have to?” David was beginning to yell, and if you weren't the subject, you would have found the entire thing ridiculously amusing. Half of you wanted to laugh at the sudden absurdity and the other half of you was mortified.

“What’s going on?” Kevin demanded as he came into the kitchen. Pam was looking knowingly between Kerry and David before shooting you a sympathetic look that made your face grow warm. “C’mon, Kerry, why don’t you have your bag? We’re gonna be late.”

“You know the red is my favorite.” You said to David after Kerry left up the stairs. He looked a little abashed now that it was just the two of you, fiddling with his fingers and avoiding your eyes.

“Look, Y/N, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean I think it’s your place to do the dishes or something. That was really stupid of me to say, I didn't mean–”

“I know.” You reassured him. He glanced up at you and his mouth opened to say more. You held your breath, waiting to see, but he closed it again.

“I should get my stuff.” He muttered, heading up the stairs. You sighed a little, looking around the little kitchen, aghast.

***

At the Sportatorium, you took your seat in the front in between Mike and Pam.

“Everything okay?” Pam asked you. You were jumpy and flinched when she touched your arm.

“Huh? Oh. Uh…I think so.” You sighed. “I hope so.” You tacked on under your breath. Soon, the main event was on and the brothers were making their way to the ring for a six-man tag match.

Kevin passed first, giving you a nod and a quick kiss to Pam. Then David, who gave you his yellow rose and a kiss to the top of the head, his red jacket matching your cheeks. But when Kerry came, you weren’t expecting him to stop and wrap his arms around you in a hug, nor were you expecting the kiss to your cheek. You didn't even feel the glares from all the women surrounding you; the only thing you could focus on what the way David had frozen and was now staring in outrage at Kerry.

“Uh oh,” you heard Mike mutter beside you, voicing your thoughts out loud. Suddenly, David took a step towards Kerry and shoved his chest.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing? You think I don’t know what you’re doing?” You heard him yell, and noticed a few fans giving the brothers confused looks. Kerry swatted David’s hand away before giving him a shove back.

“Stop it!” You hissed at them, to no avail. It was as if you suddenly weren’t even there. Thankfully, Kevin had turned back and given both of them stern slaps to the shoulder before stepping between them.

“Cut it out right now, we have a match to do.” You heard him scolding parentally, not before sending an exasperated look in your direction. You felt yourself shrinking lower.

“Oh god…this is my fault.” You mumbled to yourself, burying your face in your hands and sinking down in your seat.

“Oh, honey, this is not your fault.” Pam told you quickly, rubbing your shoulders comfortingly. “This is just two grown men acting like silly little boys.”

“Yeah, it’s not your fault they’re acting like kids.” Mike added helpfully, looking desperate to cheer you up. “You can’t blame yourself just because Kerry likes you too.”

“Too?!” you exclaimed. “What are you talking about?” Mike looked genuinely bewildered and Pam once again looked sympathetic. “When did this even happen, how?”

“Oh, honey.” She merely repeated, shaking her head. Your head was spinning.

“Pretty sure Dave knows about Kerry too, but he’s been pretending he doesn’t notice because it’s not really a secret that he likes you." Mike started to try to explain, but you were barely keeping up. "So he’s expecting Kerry to back off because you know, brothers and everything but—"

“If he didn’t know before, which he did, he does now.” Pam said, her eyes watching as David and Kerry appeared to continue arguing from where they stood on the ring apron with Kevin in the ring.

“First of all, David’s never even asked me out.” You replied finally.

“That’s what I said!” Mike seemed to defend himself. “But he just says he’s waiting for the right time. We think he’s kinda nervous you do actually like Kerry. Do you?” You blinked several times again.

“Oh my god…these boys.” You sighed, burying your head again.

You continued to watch the match unfold through squinted eyes that were further blocked with your hands, nervous that at any point David and Kerry were going to start swinging on each other instead of their opponents. Pam had her arm looped through yours, a helpful anchor keeping you from floating away. Thankfully, they seemed to be fine, and only you, Pam, and Mike were aware of the coldness between Kerry and David. As soon as Kevin got the pin, Kerry left the ring, ignoring fans all the way to the dressing room. David wasn’t far behind him, leaving Kevin to slap fans hands and sign autographs.

“I’ve got to fix this.” You said, to yourself more than anyone else. Mike and Pam were on your heels, but you all stopped short at the sound of two voices thundering inside the dressing room. You winced.

“Mike, please go in there and grab Kerry for me.” You begged. Mike’s eyes widened.

“So it is Kerry?”

“Michael, please! Before they do something!” He snapped out of it and dutifully ducked into the room. You cringed as the yelling only picked up, ten times worse. There was a clattering sound of something metal hitting something.

“I can’t tell if you’re the best thing that happened to this family…or the worst.” You jumped at the sound of Kevin’s voice behind you and groaned at his words. Thankfully, he seemed to have a half humorous grin on his face. Pam hit his shoulder lightly, shaking her head in disapproval.

“This is not her fault!” She insisted. Kevin shook his head.

“No, I know. Took everything in me to keep them from going at each other in the ring.” He muttered, looking towards the dressing room with a grimace. You groaned.

“Kev…I’m not trying to do this! The last thing I want is to get between them. I don’t want to be the reason they hate each other; if that’s the case, I’ll remove myself from this situation.”

“Hey! No one wants you to leave.” Kevin said. “We love each other to death. That just means sometimes we fight too. But we always work it out. Dave and Kerry are just gonna have to accept whatever decision you make. And they’ll have to respect it.” You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Kerry came out of the dressing room at the moment. The second he left, the door slammed shut behind him, presumably David’s doing.

“After I talk with Kerry, can you make sure you stick around waiting in the parking lot?” You lowered your voice to Pam and Kevin. You knew instantly Pam understood. Kevin opened his mouth in question, but she pressed a finger to his lips.

“We got it.” She assured you, and gave your arm a squeeze. As they walked away, Kerry approached. It was just the two of you in the dingy backstage hallway.

“Hey,” Kerry said lightly, a small smile on his face. “Mike said you wanted to see me.”

“I did…” you said, before you sighed. “Listen, Kerry…I…” you looked from the smile on his face to your shoes and the scuffs on the ground next to them. You traced circles around the marks with the toe of your shoe.

“Let me stop you for one second, Y/N.” Kerry said. You frowned a little.

“But, Kerry—“

“Just listen, please. Y/N…I can’t stop thinking about you. I can’t. All those girls out there on the way to the ring, it’s like they’re not there. All I see is your face. I dreamt about you the other night. We were together in a house of our own, just making breakfast. I mean, I know we’ve been friends for a while and everything but…I really care about you. It’s just what I meant, about Becky. I couldn’t see it working out no matter how much I tried, but with you…” You bit your lip, still unable to look up, knowing the scuffs on the floor were going to be committed to your memory forever. “Y/N?” You felt his fingers tilt your chin up gently and looked into his side eyes, like a beautiful sunny day. You allowed yourself for a second to jump into them, imagining what that path could bring. The breakfast he had mentioned, the house. Knowing every time you stepped out with him, he was the envy of every woman around you. The passion that he carried for everything and every goal would now also be geared towards you and loving you so completely and fully.

And it still didn’t feel right. Because you could see it all; the picturesque home, a loving embrace, maybe even a family of your own…but Kerry wasn’t the person in your dream.

“Kerry, I’m sorry. I don’t feel that way for you.” You whispered. “I’m sorry. I’ll always care for you as a person, but I can’t be your person.” He stared back unwaveringly, and to his credit, he nodded his head and stepped back.

“I understand that. I’m…sorry if I ruined any of the kindness you have in your heart towards me, or made you uncomfortable, I just thought that…” he sighed and straightened up again. “I should be honest. I’ll work real hard to make everything right again, alright?”

“It’s okay, Kerry. Consider this conversation forgotten.” He grinned a little.

“I do feel a little stupid now, though.” He admitted, making you laugh. “I should have known it was always David.” Just at his name alone, those familiar butterflies rushed back. You smiled.

“I really need to see him. Kevin and Pam should be waiting out back for you and Mike. I need to talk to David.” Kerry nodded, and you knocked on the dressing room door. Mike’s face appeared, looking eager for some kind of update.

“I need to talk to David.” You told him. He looked over your head to where Kerry was waiting. “Alone.”

“Oh…uh. Right.” Mike replied, still looking confused, but quickly leaving the room to join Kerry. You walked in and shut the door behind you before taking in the surroundings. There was a chair laying on the floor next to the wall, seemingly laying there after being thrown if the dent in the wall was any clue. David was sitting in another chair, one hand pressed to his mouth and the other wrapped around his midsection. He was staring at the floor, one leg shaking.

“Hey…” you murmured, not taking a step. There was a long pause.

“Y/N, you really don’t have to do this.” He said finally. “I don’t need a little pep talk, or for you to tell me how great I am but just not the right one or something. I’m a big boy, I’ll be just fine with your decision.” You frowned.

“David…”

“Really.” He said, looking up at you. “I mean, it’s Kerry for crying out loud. I get it, alright? I mean, I’ve seen every day how girls look at him. He’s great. I’m not mad, I promise. I’ll be happy for you both.”

“David, wait, seriously—“

“No, I don’t want you trying to make me feel better, Y/N.” He stood suddenly as if he couldn’t contain himself in the chair any longer. “It’s really my own fault anyways. You’re one helluva lady, you know that? Every day, I just look at you and I can’t believe you’re real. And in front of me, just sorta breathing the same air as me. I just can’t get enough of you, and I should have done something about it sooner, but I’ll admit I was scared, alright? Because you’re way out of my league, but I should have made it known. I should have told you time and time again every second how I felt, I should have treated you like it. But I just want you to be happy. I swear it. And at the end of the day, if it’s with my own brother, then that’s fine. I know he’ll take care of you.” Despite his words, you could see the unhappiness burning in his eyes. You couldn’t help but admire every word coming from his mouth, you couldn’t help but stare at his mouth, desperate to shut him up with a kiss.

“Are you finished?” You asked. His face frowned and you couldn’t help but chuckle. “Now, what on earth did Mike tell you?” David’s frown deepened.

“That you needed to talk to Kerry.”

“Okay. Is that all?” He frowned even further.

“He just started consoling me and telling me it ain’t your fault, which I never said it was—I would never blame you. Then some, you know, run of the mill peppy speech about fish in the sea…” At this point, you gave an outright laugh. “Oh, now you’re laughing at me?”

“You and Mike really should learn not to jump to conclusions so quickly. Didn’t your father ever tell you about making assumptions?” David’s face melted slowly from confusion to a hopeful wide eyed wonder.

“…What are you saying?”

“I love Kerry, but not like that. Not like…how I’ve always felt about you.”

David crossed the room within the blink of an eye and suddenly hoisted you into the air, his face buried against your neck, his arms encasing you against him.

“Oh, Y/N…oh man. You had me losing my mind.” He admitted, voice muffled against your skin. “You mean it?” He asked, leaning back to check your expression.

“Do you?” You demanded cheekily. “On second thought, maybe you should listen to Mike more. I’m still waiting for you to ask me out, David Von Erich.” David's head tilted back in laughter.

“You got it, darling, I’m not wastin’ a second more. How about this Friday?”

“That’s movie night; Kev’s not gonna be too happy with that.” You replied, giggling. David laughed again, and the both of you seemed dizzied in relief and euphoria, gripping each other tightly with the hands and yet, weak at the knees.

“Well, Kev’s just gonna have to deal with it. We’ll do movie night another night.” David said, placing you back on the ground and kissing the top of your head. Finally, finally, everything felt right.

#iron claw imagine #david von erich imagine

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goggles-mcgee · 2 years

Text

Baker Steve and Rockstar Eddie AU is now going to be called What Baking Can Do (will i write it out? Someday. Hopefully soon)

Anyways I have more headcanons for the au

•Steve doesn't wear polos anymore because of the scar around his neck. His closet is literally filled with the softest sweaters and t-shirts he could get his hands on. The softness brings him comfort and feels nice on the scars.

•He always smells like baked goods and the kids love it. It's why they always give him hugs right when they see him, they love the smell and his hugs are so warm and just the best.

•All the kids help out at the bakery when they can, they think it's fun and plus! Job experience! El, Will and surprisingly Lucas all like to help out in the back, Steve teaches them his recipes and how to bake because these are his kids and they will be his legacy so he will teach them everything he can. Max, while not the best with customer service as well as Mike, are both really good at remembering peoples orders if they are sitting at the tables. Dustin is great as a greeter and handing people their to-go orders. Erica is the best taste-tester.

•Look, Steve is still hella popular with the ladies but now he's just so oblivious to their advances, like girls he went on dates with in high-school are trying to BAG this boy but he's always like, "Hang out? Sorry I can't Lucas has a game that day and I promised I'd make him basketball cupcakes."

"Lunch to catch up? I'd love to Brenda but the kids have their little Hotfire club thingy and I promised I would sit in for the session. Raincheck?"

"Dinner? Oh my god thank you for reminding me! We have a family dinner this weekend and I said I'd bring cornbread and a cake."

The kids think it's absolutely hilarious, like how dare you try to date our mom???? And yes they have purposefully "reminded" Steve of something he "promised."

•Eddie has witnessed this on one of his visits and he too finds it hilarious yet endearing. Like Steve may be a little dumb when it comes to people flirting with him but Eddie likes that in a man.

•Eddie is a romantic and absolutely brings Steve a bouquet every time he visits. He finds out quickly that sunflowers and roses are Steve's favorites.

•Eddie always enters the cafe loudly announcing, "HONEY I'M HOME!" Steve grumbles that he's disturbing the customers but he loves it. He always gets the biggest smile when Eddie comes in.

He especially loves hearing that phrase when Eddie's been gone for awhile due to a tour or something of the like.

•Once Steve finds out who Eddie is he tracks down some of his records to listen to and finds he actually likes some of the songs so when Eddie came in next time Steve absolutely just rambled on and on about how much he loved the songs and told Eddie what he liked about them and Eddie is just slowly melting into a puddle hiding behind his hair.

•Steve let's the kids and Robin play whatever music they want when they are working but when he's by himself he absolutely plays ABBA, The Cure, Wham, David Bowie or Prince.

Eddie loves this ridiculous man despite the Wham

•Steve will absolutely close the cafe if one of the kids call him and they're sad, just plain having a bad day or if they are having an emergency. He doesn't care if it's a rush, or if you need your banana bread right now Bethany, his kids need him.

•When Eddie first started visiting and the kids didn't run into him due to conflicting schedules and what not, he finds out quickly that Steve doesn't know who he is so he has no problem giving Steve his name. (He holds himself back from asking if Steve likes his last name enough to take it)

They slowly start to get to know each other and Eddie tells Steve he writes songs and Steve just declares that he's sure Eddie is great at it despite not reading any of Eddie's songs or listening to the man sing and when Eddie point that out Steve just huffy.

"You're an amazing guy Eddie who has seen and done so much. It's not hard to believe that you are talented at writing songs. You really have a way with words!"

And Eddie just wants to lay on the floor, this boy is too precious. He can't.

•When Robin is down on her days off from school and working at the cafe, her and Steve wear matching "uniforms" which is really her just snatching one of his sweaters (of course matching colors), putting on her apron and she always insists they switch name tags.

Steve always rolls his eyes but he also always does it. That's how regulars know Robin is back because Steve will be wearing the nametag 'Robin'

•They absolutely decorate the cage for every holiday. They go all out and it's always the most fun Steve has had on holidays.

Christmas: Him, Robin and the kids get ugly sweaters to wear for the cafe

Halloween: costumes but Robin and Steve are always Batman and Robin because they think it's funny.

Valentine's Day: Argyle made them shirts with neon colored Sweethearts Candies on them and they wear them every time.

Thanksgiving: Robin thinks it's hilarious for her and Steve to dress like vegetables. Dustin likes to be the Turkey. (Steve is almost always the corn)

•They do decorate the cafe for any member in the family's birthday for the day even if they're not having the party there.

•Eddie absolutely starts writing songs about Steve and that's how his band mates find out about him because they catch him singing the songs and other love songs.

•Eddie loves his band but he doesn't tell them where he goes when he goes to visit Steve, they share a lot, practically everything and he will introduce Steve to them and them to Steve but he doesn't do it right away because 1. He's wooing the man of his dreams 2. He just wants it to be for himself for a while

He does offer them treats though as an apology/bribe

•Eddie loves the kids but he is also terrified of them. Yes they are fans of his, but they clock in on the fact he wants to date Steve so fast and they each give him separate shovel talks. They make sure Steve doesn't see them do it though.

•Eddie fully thinks Steve is this super tender, sweet, sarcastic guy who wouldn't hurt a fly until he witnesses Steve defend him from an overzealous fan (which felt more like a stalker) that had followed them after they had had lunch at this local diner.

The fan had tried to get grabby. Had tried to take a "souvenir."

Steve has a mean right hook.

Steve so looked so proud of himself that he knocked the fucker out. He even put his hands on his hips and smiled all cutesy, "I won a fight!"

Which that sentence isn't terrifying right?

That was their first kiss. Also might have been the night Eddie confessed.

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morallyinept · 2 months

Text

A full character analysis on JOEL MILLER from the TV show THE LAST OF US.

I've created this as a point of reference when writing for Pedro's characters, and I hope you find it useful. Even if you just want to learn more about the character. 🖤

FULL MASTERLIST OF PEDRO'S CHARACTERS ANALYSED

FULL CHARACTER STUDY:

MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS FOR SEASON 2/THE GAME!

Basic Details:

☝️This character study focuses primarily on TV series Joel, but draws on some comparisons from the game version of Joel.

*I made a previous error with regards to Outbreak Day in the game & Joel's age - so this version is now correct.

Full Name: Joel Miller

Nickname(s): None mentioned

Appears in: The Last Of Us, 2023 (first appearance on screen in episode 1, season 1, seen at approx. 04:56)

Age (if known): Joel is seen in the TV series at both the ages of 36 (Outbreak Day happens on his 36th birthday) and we catch up with him 20 years after Outbreak Day at the age of 56, where he's based in the Boston QZ

Sexuality: Straight - Joel has a 14 year-old daughter, Sarah, from a previous relationship with her mother, however it's not confirmed if he was married to her mother or not in the TV show. It's implied that Joel is in some kind of relationship with Tess Servopoulos, although never actually confirmed.

Nationality: American. Joel is from Texas originally

Family: 1 daughter, Sarah. 1 younger brother, Tommy. No other family mentioned.

Spouse/Partner: Joel appears to be currently single at the age of 36, and in a potential relationship of some kind with Tess Servopoulos (before she dies) at age 56

Relationship Status: Currently single

Current Living Status: Deceased - In the video game's sequel, The Last of Us Part II, Joel is shockingly murdered in the first act of the game by Abby, the daughter of the Firefly surgeon Joel killed in order to let Ellie live. Joel is killed by Abby after she beats him to death with a golf club. As of creating this character analysis, it is yet to be determined if Joel will be killed off in Season 2 of the TV series.

Languages Spoken: English

Education: It would be prudent to assume that Joel would have attended high school as a minimum based on his intelligence and skills etc... In the game, it mentions he was unable to attend college due to having Sarah at such a young age, however in the TV series he is older when he had her, so therefore could have attended college/further education, although it is never confirmed.

Occupation:

Job Role/Title: Before the Outbreak, Joel was a contractor in the construction/carpentry industry

Special Skill(s): Building and fixing things, hunting, use of guns and ammo, smuggler, survivalist skills

Notable Colleague(s): Ellie, Tommy, Tess

Distinguishing Features:

Tattoo(s): None

Piercings: None

Scar(s): Scar on his right side temple due to a failed suicide attempt when Joel tried to shoot himself after Sarah's death. Joel also suffers a bullet graze on the left side of his abdomen/hip, in episode one where the soldier shoots at him and Sarah. This scar is later seen briefly in the scene where Ellie stitches him up after he is stabbed by David's men, from which he is also left with a scar.

Other Markings: Joel has a scratch/gash on the right side of his face in episode two, and throughout the series he sustains several other minor injuries resulting in temporary abrasions, cuts, bruises etc... Also has a gash on the left side of his neck in episode 8/9.

Prominent Feature(s): Greying curled hair, facial scruff also greying

Injuries: Several. Joel hairline fractures his right hand after punching out the FEDRA guard - he punches him 15 times in the face/skull. Joel is pistol-whipped with a rifle in the back of his head in episode 9, knocking him out and suffering a concussion. Joel is scarred from a failed suicide attempt on his temple, has scars on his stomach/abdomen from being shot at and stabbed. Joel suffers several cuts/abrasions and bruises from general surviving and fighting. Joel also appears to have bad knees when he's older, and walks with a limped gait.

Eye Colour: Brown

Hair Colour: Brown/greying

The scar on the side of Joel's right temple above his eye, from where he tried to shoot himself:

Personality:

Traits: Brave, protective, strong

Joel speaks with a prominent Texan accent. In the show it appears he's living in or just outside of Travis County, Austin, Texas.

In the game, Joel was born on 26th September, 1981 in Arlington, Texas. In the TV series however, Joel would have been born on 26th September, 1967.

The majority of the game play is set 20 years after the opening scene. Which means Joel is 32 when Sarah is alive. Sarah is 12 in the game before she dies, so that means Joel was a father at age 20 in the game. In the TV series however, Sarah is 14 at the time of her death and Joel is 36, meaning he would have had her at the age of 21/22. In the game, Joel was born in 1981 and Outbreak Day happens in 2013, meaning Joel is 32 in the game, and not 36 like in the show, on Outbreak Day. As Joel is 36 in 2003 in the TV show on Outbreak Day, it means he would have been born in 1967, counting backwards from 2003 by 36 years.

The time on Joel's watch in the TV series when it stops, after the bullet ricochets off his watch and hits Sarah, reads on or around 02:40AM. (Sarah woke up at 11:03pm, and between that and the time of her death a few hours would have passed with them trying to escape etc...)

It is implied that Joel and Tess are in a relationship to some extent in the TV series, although it's never actually confirmed romantically between them. Joel explains to Ellie they met when they were in a group together, and are smugglers when we meet them in the show. They are seen living together in an apartment in the Boston QZ and sharing the same bed. Tess also states that she never asked Joel to feel the same way she did, before she dies, implying some possible unrequited love there.

Joel is a self-employed contractor in the construction trade before Outbreak Day. He and his brother Tommy appear to work together and drive to the site together in Tommy's truck.

In the game, Joel is murdered by Abby in revenge for killing her father, who turned out to be the surgeon who was going to operate on Ellie to find a cure. She brutally beats him to death with a golf club. It is yet to be determined whether the TV series will follow this same story arc for Joel and kill his character off, or if they will re-work another story arc for him. For now, it is widely assumed/speculated Joel will die at some point in the TV series too.

In the TV series, Joel is hard of hearing in his right ear, however in the game, Joel's hearing is completely fine. Joel attributes his hearing loss to gunshots, but later explains to Ellie he tried to take his life after Sarah died, so it's also presumed that doing that possibly affected his hearing.

It's not confirmed if Sarah's mother and Joel were married in the TV series, or why she left, and nor do we learn the name of Sarah's mother. In the game however, Joel mentions he was briefly married to Sarah's mother.

In the TV series, Joel is much more of a softer character than in the game. Craig Mazin stated that they wanted Joel to appear more "frail" which would coincide with a real life 56 year-old who "can't crouch for more than three minutes otherwise their back would give out." In the TV series Joel is seen to suffer with panic attacks indicating he feels much more emotion than the game version of Joel, who is more hardened.

Joel reveals to Ellie he would have liked to have been a singer and can play the guitar. Although in season 1 we don't hear or see Joel singing or playing guitar. Joel has an acoustic guitar poster on his wall in his bedroom on the TV series.

The time shown stopped on Joel's watch in the TV Series:

Fashion/Outfits:

Outfit 1 - (Opening scene) Black round neck t-shirt, denim jeans

Outfits - (Remainder of series) - Joel's overall look consists mostly of plaid shirts and denim looking shirts, worn-in denim jeans and boots, that are all in various stages of wear and tear. He is seen duct taping his boots together. He sports various jackets and coats throughout the seasons, weather dependent.

Joel's green plaid shirt is actually Frank's/worn by Frank before Joel even meets Bill and Frank when he's younger with Tess. Later after their deaths, Joel showers and dresses in a clean shirt, which is the green plaid shirt that Joel is synonymous for wearing. He is dressed very similarly to Frank, even wearing similar jeans, boots, just like Frank did.

Joel has a red backpack when he is younger with Tess. Then later, he has a brown one which he then leaves behind during the attack in Kansas City. When Henry dies, Joel takes Henry's backpack as his own which is a lighter sandy brown colour.

Accessories: Watch on left wrist, brown/sand coloured backpack, rifle sling with holster

Weapons Used:

Weapon(s): (Exact weapons pictured below)

Joel's primary weapon is a pistol. A Taurus Model 66 with blue finished 4-inch barrel and rubber grip. This is the same pistol that Joel uses in the game too. He keeps it hidden under the floorboards of his apartment in the Boston QZ until needed.

Joel uses a variety of guns in the TV series, mostly those that he finds or takes from others, including a Beretta M92FS, Colt M4A1 Carbine rifle, Remington 700 BDL rifle and a Rugler mini-14.

Joel also uses switchblades and knives too.

Joel uses a piece of metal piping to bash in the head one of David's men when looking for Ellie.

Modes of Transport:

Vehicle(s):

In the TV series, we don't actually see Joel drive, or potentially own, a vehicle of his own. He rides in Tommy's pickup truck, which is a 2001 Chevrolet Silverado 1500HD Crew Cab. He is seen as a passenger in it when leaving for work in the morning, and later when he, Sarah and Tommy try to flee the city.

Joel drives various vehicles in the series, including a 2004 Dodge Durango, the car he uses to take Ellie from the hospital in episode 9. And most notably, Bill's blue and white 2001 Chevrolet S-10 for which Bill leaves the keys for Joel in episode 3.

Dialogue:

🗨 See Joel's full dialogue from the show, including deleted scenes.

Further Character Links (if any):

Joel Miller Game Version Wiki Page, Joel Miller TV Series Version Wiki Page, Making of The Last Of Us - BTS

Samples of Joel's wardrobe via styleofpascal IG

FULL MASTERLIST OF PEDRO'S CHARACTERS ANALYSED

#joel miller #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #joel miller tlou #joel miller character analysis #pedro pascal character database #joel miller the last of us #joel miller character study

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catherinetheprincessofwales · 1 month

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Kate is not your drama queen Her self-possession drives people wild - Jenny McCartney UnHerd.

Just over a decade ago, the late novelist Hilary Mantel delivered a lecture to an event at the London Review of Books and triggered national outrage. In the course of a talk on “Royal Bodies”, which ranged widely across royal women from Anne Boleyn to Marie Antoinette and Princess Diana, she had made what many perceived as disparaging remarks about Kate Middleton, then the Duchess of Cambridge. The Duchess, she said, appeared to have been “designed by a committee and built by craftsmen, with a perfect plastic smile and the spindles of her limbs hand-turned and gloss-varnished”. Indeed, Mantel said, Kate “seems to have been selected for her role of princess because she was irreproachable: as painfully thin as anyone could wish, without quirks, without oddities, without the risk of the emergence of character”.

At this, the newspapers were soon in uproar. The prime minister David Cameron called the comments “completely misguided and completely wrong” and the Labour leader Ed Miliband agreed they were “pretty offensive”. Mantel doggedly refused to back down, saying that her remarks had been twisted out of context, and that she was in fact writing with sympathy about the perceptions that are forcefully projected on to royal women, the cage in which they are held to be goggled at. That was true, but also perhaps not the entire truth, for there was still a perceptible trace of authorial vinegar in the portrait: which of us would be happy to learn, even in sympathy, that we were held at low risk for “the emergence of character”?

Royals are public as well as private figures, of course, and authors are free to hang intellectual ideas on them to try out, as designers do with clothes. Yet while much of the lecture was sharply perceptive, I didn’t agree with the portrait of Kate. That word “selected” had rendered her passive, when in fact her behaviour thus far had suggested both an active intelligence and an unusual degree of self-discipline. The context of her entry into “The Firm” was different from that of other royal brides. Unlike Diana, who had barely emerged from the fractured chrysalis of her troubled aristocratic family when she first met the much older, more worldly Prince Charles, Kate was a contemporary of Prince William’s at the University of St Andrews. Her family background, which appeared warm and supportive, was comfortably middle-class. She seemed generally cheerful and unruffled, even when the press was at the barbed peak of its “Waity Katie” hysteria, trying to goad Prince William into a proposal or abandonment.

After the wedding, in her approach to royal duties, she clearly took the role she had inherited with marriage seriously. The royal whose attitude her own most resembled was the late Queen Elizabeth II, who had long understood the essential nature of the job: to turn up to public events looking the part, intuit precisely what was needed — gravitas, fun, consolation or reassurance — and deliver it while keeping one’s personal emotions on the back burner. This is what a monarchy demands, and the ability to act as an impeccable interpreter of the public mood, year after year, is a particular and testing art. A few have a natural aptitude for it, but most of us do not, and would quickly find its scrutiny and restrictions intolerable.

Grace under consistent pressure is an admirable quality. Were a ballet dancer to execute a string of flawless performances, or a pilot to conduct numerous flights without incident, it would not be deemed evidence of an absence of character: quite the opposite. Yet in Kate — especially for those who increasingly conduct their lives online — serene self-possession seems to drive a proportion of onlookers insane: what lurks behind it, what dark secret is waiting to destroy it, how best might it be disrupted? The uncomfortable truth is that what many people deeply crave in a young and beautiful royal wife and mother is not competence, but crack-up

The increasingly bizarre treatment of Kate, or the idea of Kate, is connected to the most dominant phenomenon of our age: a cultural prioritising of drama over duty. The supply of drama has spilled beyond the confines of the novel, theatre, cinema or television to become a commodity on which our public figures are judged. When Mantel spoke of Kate’s apparent absence of emerging “character” she was assessing her primarily through the hungry eyes of a novelist. In books, central female characters often generate dramatic tension by chafing against their circumstances, by the intensifying dazzle of their discontents, something that Kate refused to transmit. In contrast, Mantel described Diana as a “carrier of myth”: Diana, publicly trapped in the disappointments of her marriage, certainly carried more plot twists than any author had a right to expect. Unfortunately for her, the final one was her shockingly premature death.

Set against this artistic conception of “character” — distinctive qualities or flaws that, one way or another, deliver drama — is the societal judgement “of good character”, meaning someone who is broadly reliable and respected in relation to their behaviour to others. In recent years the electorate, in line with Neil Postman’s warning in his 1985 book, Amusing Ourselves To Death, has proved increasingly ready to select the former over the latter, even to the marked detriment of our civic health. The former prime minister Boris Johnson instinctively understood it as his job not to deliver the detail of workable policy, but to satisfy the public’s appetite for story: “People live by narrative,” he once told UnHerd’sTom McTague. In the US, Donald Trump — that relentless generator of low mockery and high fury — is now running for a second term as president, after his first one ended in his supporters storming the Capitol building.

Men are often permitted to survive the frantic generation of drama: it is everyone around them who suffers. Yet women — in art and life — have a greater tendency to be destroyed by it. There is no strutting female equivalent of the male “hellraiser”, but rather a woman who, soaked in the crocodile tears of the tabloids, is tragically “causing concern” among friends. Art and its audiences have always relished the restless struggle and disintegration of female characters who are, or become, unmoored from the harbour of marriage and children. Flaubert’s Emma Bovary — her imagination inflamed by reading novels — is bored with her marriage and disenchanted with motherhood; she seeks solace in affairs and excessive spending, the consequences of which hasten her suicide. Zola’s Nana, a courtesan who ruthlessly captivates Parisian society, has her beguiling face eaten away by smallpox. Janis Joplin and Amy Winehouse, immolated on their blazing talent, are hung posthumously high in the musical hall of fame, next to Sylvia Plath in the poetry section and Marilyn Monroe in cinema.

In Jean Rhys’s Good Morning, Midnight,a middle-aged English woman called Sasha Jansen, mourning an unhappy marriage and a dead child, finds herself in Paris, a vulnerable drifter seeking solace from stray men. Rhys herself, who died at 88 after a precarious but surprisingly long life, had much in common with her literary creations. As the writer and editor Diana Athill crisply put it: “Jean was absolutely incapable of living, life was just hopelessly beyond her. When she was young, she floated from man to man in a hopeless way… by the time she was old, she floated from kind woman to kind woman.”

In Rhys’s latter years — hard-drinking, irascible and impoverished — Athill and a small group of female friends formed what they called “The Jean Rhys Committee” which met regularly to ask “what should we do next?”. Rhys’s claim to such loyalty, I suppose, was the weight of her literary talent, her ability to exert an odd kind of fascination, and the fortunate soft-heartedness of her friends. The dramatic collided with the dutiful, and was kept alive by it.

From what I can see, the Princess of Wales exists at the opposite end of the feminine spectrum from Jean Rhys. Pinned firmly in place by her royal obligations, her wealth, her marriage and three children, she belongs to the realm of the respectable and dutiful rather than the erratic and dramatic. She is not a “character” in the artistic sense, nor does she desire to be, but both a survivor and upholder of an institution: hers is the territory of the prompt thank-you note, the kept promise, the commitment to public service, the uncomplicated pleasure in children, the stoic endurance of difficult times in the hope that better ones will come along soon. The public senses an emotional solidity in her, and it is partly why she is held in broad esteem. In this age of insistent self-definition, duty to others might be an unfashionable concept, but it is nonetheless one that keeps families and institutions from chaos and collapse.

With the advent of the internet, however, anyone with a keyboard can become a form of author, with the freedom to insert a toxic form of drama into real-life situations. What was extraordinary, during the Princess of Wales’s recent health problems, is how speedily and carelessly such speculations overrode the bounds of decency. It was already known that she had undergone major abdominal surgery, and was taking time to recover. And yet — egged on by the participation of silly celebrities and malicious US comedians — conspiracy theories about cosmetic surgery and affairs and nervous breakdowns spread like knotweed. According to social-media researchers, these were also vigorously introduced and amplified by fake accounts set up on Twitter and TikTok, some associated with Russia-linked disinformation eager to spread the termites of mistrust and doubt in Western institutions. Only the Princess of Wales’s revelation of cancer, which carries a testing drama all its own, served to shut up the majority of them.

Unlike these callous gossips, Mantel recognised her own complicity in dehumanising royalty. Upon encountering the late Queen, the novelist said: “I passed my eyes over her as a cannibal views his dinner, my gaze sharp enough to pick the meat off her bones.” The Queen looked back at her, she said, briefly hurt. Mantel warned of the way in which “cheerful curiosity can easily become cruelty” precisely as it has done in recent weeks. Her talk concluded with a prescient instruction for those who comprehend monarchy mainly as a source of entertainment: “I’m asking us to back off and not be brutes.”

In the midst of treatment and recovery, the most hitherto stable of royal women could be forgiven a keen sense of injustice: her job description, it seems, must now include the ability to weather the online public’s fits of brutish mania for drama. With its contempt for duty, and its savage appetite for story, it is hungry to chew up far more than just the Princess of Wales.

#ktd #kate middleton #british royal family #brf #princess of wales

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