#btw i love receiving asks like this about keeper | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ghastlybin · 1 year

Note

HI I’M BACK I WOULD LOVE TO SEE MORE ON REAPER! SEONGHWA PLEASE I LOVED HIS INTEGRATION IN THE YEOSANG FIC YOU DID AS PER MY REQUEST YOU CAN DO AN X READER OR JUST A LORE TYPE FIC ABOUT HIM AS A REAPER BUT EITHER I NEED IT THANK YOUUUUU ~ overexcited atiny anon 🙈

Hahahahaha yooooooo back again ay? Anywho, thank you for your request and patience, I uhhh combined your suggestions? Lore + an X reader LOL. Trying out a new format also so I hope it doesn't look too weird. Anyways, ILY PLEASE ENJOY and lmk of any feedback.

-> DON'T FORGET TO LOOK AT THE WARNINGS GDI.

Yeosang fic mentioned in the ask

W.C▾5.1K

Seonghwa X GN Reader

▾Reaper! Seonghwa ▾ Reaper! Reader ▾ FT. Souls keeper! Hongjoong, Angels! Yeosang, Wooyoung, and Jongho, Demon! San, Yunho and Mingi are humans, still. ▾ Angst ▾ Fluff ▾ Blasphemous language ▾ Strong language ▾ Pet loss mentions? not descriptive dw ▾ Familial loss mentions? ▾ major character death ig?▾ Hiding your relationship, yk how that goes ▾ Takes place before/ during Yeosang being outcast from the angelic realm ▾ San is innocent btw ▾ Shit goes down lol ▾ I lowkey cried but that’s because I’m a lil bitch▾ Oh, Dreamcatcher’s Siyeon is mentioned as a reaper▾ She has plot armor despite being in one line & she's innocent too▾ the reader / Y/N is better than me fr, I’d translate these hands into fists so fast- ▾

The realm that separated the angels and the demons.

Purgatory.

The in-between, as some called it. Some argued that it was on par with the demonic realm while others- Namely the demons, disagreed.

None of it bothered Seonghwa. He ran the place, after all, being the lead reaper. None of the gossip fazed him. He knew the place better than anyone.

The ins and the outs, the plant life that grew exclusively around the realm, every form of matter, he could even tell you where something was without a doubt in mind.

Seonghwa met everyone that entered the realm and was there to bid farewell to anyone leaving.

It was his home and if someone didn’t like it, well, good thing it was his home and not theirs.

He’s had a fair share of run-ins with new and old souls that pass through his mist-blanketed realm.

He met babies and children up to the age of fourteen, some who didn’t make it to their first year, some who were almost teenagers but were cut short, and some who were placed in the hands of the wrong people. He met teenagers and adults, of varying ages.

Every cause of death, what they were doing before their last moments, he knew as if it were an instant message to his brain.

Then he met animals of all kinds. They would love him instantly, having a sense that he wasn’t bad and in turn would ease their fears. Seonghwa took care of them all. Escorting them to where they needed to go.

The animals went across the rainbow bridge, where Hongjoong waited on the other side, happily greeting each and every one.

Seonghwa wasn’t the ‘bad’ version of Hongjoong, nor was he a demon. He was a reaper. He didn’t kill or order anyone to be killed because of his title.

No one feared him in purgatory. Not with the warm welcome or the kindness he showed to newcomers regardless of their lives spent on earth.

“Is my mom here?“

“Have you seen my pet?”

“Is my dad here?”

“My sibling passed away before me. Will I see them again?”

Seonghwa knew the answers to every question. Most of the time it would be a simple,

“Yes. They have been waiting for you.” But when the answer was, “No.”, he could never seem to find the right answer no matter how simple.

Sometimes the people they were looking for were still alive on the land of the living. Sometimes, they were in a different realm, inaccessible to the person asking. And still, Seonghwa tried his best to help ease these souls’ anguish.

“Welcome, my name is Seonghwa.” Everyone got that greeting except for animals. They received pats and treats Seonghwa kept on him at all times.

“Don’t be afraid. This is just temporary. You are safe.” No one feared him. But some did occasionally fear where they entered, thinking they were in the demonic realm.

▸

If Seonghwa hadn’t been at this for far longer than you, you’d be the leader of the reapers. There was no denying that you were the second best. Even Seonghwa, the actual leader of the reapers, would appoint you as the leader if he could.

The Purgatory Realm was an open space for any reaper residing there or just passing through, no area was off limits, though you— As well as every other reaper had claimed their areas of the realm.

Whenever someone or an animal ended up on your respective area of the realm, you were always kind and offered any form of comfort to them, knowing they were just as confused as you were when you died centuries ago.

And among the reapers, you were voted the best at escorting those who recently passed on. To Seonghwa, that didn’t come as a surprise. Because out of the other reapers, you had the worst death.

Yet you were still unbroken.

“Hey there buddy! Lived a long life, didn’t we?” You cheerfully called towards the fully grown dog, who happily wagged his tail on his way toward you. Upon placing your hand on top of his head, you were able to see his full life, starting from the moment he was born, to the moment he died.

What felt like yet another lifetime, was only a few seconds and you were back in your corner of the realm, still petting the dog, who didn’t live a life as happy as he was in front of you.

“Oh no… You’re safe here. No one can hurt you here.” You kissed the top of his head before checking the name on the collar.

“Luck? Lucky? What does that say?” You murmured, trying to read the name that had faded with time.

“What is his name?” Seonghwa startled you, causing you to drop the nametag. You looked at the lead reaper, who kneeled beside you to pet the dog.

“Lucky, I assume.”

“It’s Luke.”

You raised your eyebrows in realization, seeing the faded letters matching up with Seonghwa’s observation.

“I’m calling an audit. His name is now Lucky.”

Seonghwa smiled, petting Lucky— Or Luke, as he happily wagged his tail.

“Lucky or Luke, we should get him to the rainbow bridge soon.”

“Can I keep him?” You asked, rising to your feet, looking at Seonghwa with persuading eyes.

“You ask that for every animal you meet.”

“And everyone always tells me no.”

Seonghwa stood up, patting the side of his leg for Lucky to follow. You followed as well, feeling gloomy about having to part with Lucky soon.

“I would let you keep every animal if they didn’t risk losing the ability to reincarnate.” Seonghwa rang the bell for Hongjoong, causing the rainbow bridge to appear as the fog parted ways for the three of you.

Lucky barked, picking up speed towards the bridge. You smiled bittersweetly.

“Does he have to reincarnate? Humans suck.”

“I agree with you on that,” Seonghwa sighed, stopping both of you from getting too close to the bridge. “But this time, Luke— Lucky, is guaranteed a nice life.”

“Ah, so a peace offering for the shit he lived through previously.” You stuffed your hands in your pockets as Hongjoong was taken by surprise when Lucky jumped up, wagging his tail and licking Hongjoong all over his face. He laughed, wiping his face when Lucky raced towards the other animals excitedly.

“Next animal that comes through with a horrible life, I’m going to the land of the living and showing them why I used to be a demon.” You mumbled, being completely serious.

With that, Seonghwa laughed, a rare sound to hear from the leader of the reapers. Hongjoong waved towards you two from the other side of the bridge before it faded back into the fog.

“For now, try not to get your title relinquished, alright? I still need you.” He looked around as he said that but then his eyes stopped on you, who smirked.

“For a scary reaper, you sure are sentimental.”

▸

Those inhabiting the purgatory realm didn’t have to follow any angelic or demonic rules. They were free to do and say whatever as long as it didn’t interfere with the angels or demons.

However, reapers only had one unspoken rule.

No two reapers can be in a relationship.

Same for a reaper and an angel or a reaper and a demon.

Unspoken, yet every reaper knew not to pursue a relationship with anyone. Their purpose was to focus on their jobs as reapers and they would have complete control over their soul.

Even the soul's keepers have this rule implemented.

The risk of losing your soul didn’t stop you or Seonghwa from being with each other, sneaking around just to see each other by unprofessional means and hiding your feelings for each other from the other prying reapers.

You were sure some of the other reapers suspected something. Even Seonghwa had heard rumors about you dating someone, whether it was an angel or a demon— And although only half true, he would still deny them on your behalf.

If anyone paid any more attention, your relationship would be obvious.

Seonghwa knew only one other person— Other than you, knew how much he loved you.

Hongjoong.

He is the soul's keeper, after all. Someone with that much access to someone’s soul? Of course he’d know.

And having that kind of knowledge would be kept strictly confidential.

You two have gotten used to hiding from everyone, albeit exhausting. It didn’t feel fair, how demons could freely fall for each other, or how angels had access to full blown celebrations but only when a relationship was deemed serious enough.

There was a loneliness that came with loving Seonghwa, that had nothing to do with him and everything to do with whoever created the rule of reapers living their eternities alone.

It was hardly living. And because you were a reaper, you weren’t living at all.

What a cruel way to live, not being able to love someone out loud.

Seonghwa found you sitting by the dark pond with a small fog that blanketed the body of water, parting more when Seonghwa got closer.

“Any newly deceased around here?” Seonghwa asked, sitting against the grey grass beside you.

“I escorted fifteen people two hours ago. Siyeon said she’d take over for me.” You stared out at the pond where the fog wasn’t covering the water.

“Good. You could use a break,” Seonghwa smiled, leaning back with his elbows propping him up. “Is this your favorite place?”

You looked at him, a smile instantly forming on your face seeing the man that has made you feel more alive in death.

“No.” You tossed a pebble into the water, causing a small ripple. “My favorite place is in front of gate P-043.”

“Which gate is that?” Seonghwa looked at you with furrowed eyebrows. You smiled a little wider.

“The gate I met you at… Some of the reapers and I have named every known gate into the realm.” You explained, easing his expression. He sat up, tossing a pebble into the water, copying your previous action.

“I have an idea.” Seonghwa turned to face you and in turn, you did the same.

“You always wished we could show affection freely, yeah?” he continued.

You nodded slowly. Seonghwa grinned, taking your hand and flattened it against his, proceeding to put both your middle finger and ringer finger down against your palm.

“Devil horns?” You questioned, leaving your hand in the form he put it in.

Seonghwa chuckled, shaking his head, “No, no. Look.”

He put down your index finger and thumb, only leaving your pinky.

“I.”

Then he put your pinky down, creating a fist momentarily before bringing up your index finger and thumb.

“L.”

Seonghwa paused to examine your focused expression. He smiled, leaving your thumb up but putting your index down and bringing your pinky back up.

“Y.”

Getting the meaning, you brought up every finger except your middle and ring fingers, keeping those pressed against your palm.

“Oh.” You felt that feeling again. The fluttering in your chest. The comforting warmth that came with the knowing that someone loved you.

“This is how we can remind each other freely. Just do this with your hand.” Seonghwa mimicked what you just called ‘devil horns’.

“Secret code?”

Seonghwa placed a hand against your face, running his thumb gently across your cheek, “yes. It’s innocent, discreet, friendly— You just referred to it as devil horns, so I doubt anyone else will catch on.”

You laughed, “not to mention that most of the angels already consider us demons for associating with death.”

“Please, it’s not like we kill people ourselves.” Seonghwa softly scoffed, watching you replicate the sign he put your hand in.

I.L.Y.

“I love you.” He whispered, gazing at you in complete and utter admiration.

And you stared at him in a stunned silence, raising your hand up a little higher.

I.L.Y.

▸

“Did you two hear about what Yeosang did?” Jongho asked, standing before you and Seonghwa. The angel had entered the realm to accept those recently deceased who were accepted into the angelic realm. Of course, he waited for the new angels to walk through the gate to the angelic realm before asking that.

“The guardian angel?” Seonghwa replied. Jongho nodded as if it were obvious.

“I don’t know the full story, but he’s been cast out to the demons.” Jongho looked back at the gate, seeing the angelic realm awaiting his return. “I’m sure he’ll visit… I gotta go before the gods and goddesses get suspicious. Everyone is on edge.”

You waited for the gates to close behind Jongho, waving at him as they did. Then you turned toward Seonghwa.

“The gods and goddesses are fucking confusing,” You mumbled, walking away with Seonghwa, yet catching him off-guard. “They love everyone— Or so they say, but can’t pardon their number one guardian angel for one goddamn sin? It’s a bunch of bullshit if you ask me.”

“You have a point, but maybe don’t say that near their gates…” Seonghwa let out a laugh. You made a motion of zipping your lips, followed by a wink.

“As I’ve said, they already think we’re demons that kill people and animals, so really, what’s the worst I can say?”

Seonghwa stopped walking, halting your movements as well by grabbing your arm and spinning you around to face him.

“Before we part ways for the day,” Seonghwa whispered. You had just enough time to process what he was doing just before feeling his lips pressed against yours.

There it was again, the warmth comfort of someone loving you. The type of feeling that can only be replicated by one person and no one else. You couldn’t help but dream of a day where you and Seonghwa could openly love each other the way demons, angels, and humans could as his lips were synced with yours for a prolonged amount of time.

“Am I interrupting?”

You and Seonghwa instantly pulled apart, mortified, having been caught. San raised his eyebrows slightly, a nonchalant expression adorned on his face.

“Before I ask what I intended, I will say now that I don’t give a shit about turning anyone in. The gods and goddesses can-”

“San,” You interrupted, shaking from the fear of losing everything in a single moment. “Please don’t say a word to anyone.”

San raised both hands, “as I said, I am not a snitch. An arsonist, yes. But never a snitch, Have more faith in me, will you?”

Seonghwa closed his eyes with a bowed head, deep in thought. San looked at you, a small smile forming on his face. You noticed it was a sincere smile rather than mischievous.

“For the record, giving the reapers a rule against dating is fucking stupid.” San dropped his arms to his side. “But what the hell do I know?”

You still couldn’t shake the feeling of being close to losing everything you’ve lived for— Despite not being alive. You could lose your title as a reaper, or you could lose your soul.

Or you could lose Seonghwa.

And he could lose you before he could really have you.

“I, San, will not say a word or even mention it,” San sighed, “Now, I need help finding a specific herb located in limbo… Please?”

Seonghwa accepted, motioning you to continue on with your daily obligations.

You began to walk away, your heart thumping in your chest. You turned to look at Seonghwa one last time, seeing he was speaking to San but being too far to hear their conversation.

You looked down at his side, seeing his hand and how his middle and ring fingers were pressed against his palm and his pinky, index finger, and thumb were the only visible fingers.

I.L.Y.

He wasn’t looking at you, but you did the same, mimicking the placement of his fingers.

▸

It quickly became a reflex of yours to hold up your hand in that formation when you would see Seonghwa looking your way.

And he would, on instinct, replicate your ‘devil horns’.

Other reapers noticed, but they too thought you were both in on some inside joke that made fun of demons. As time went by, they got used to it, ignoring you and Seonghwa when you’d hold up the sign that read, I.L.Y.

If anyone bothered to pay closer attention, they’d know.

But they didn’t.

Most of your time spent with Seonghwa was spent at the pond, where I love you wasn’t just an unspoken sign on your hands.

“Someday we will be free.” Seonghwa had a small smile across his lips, both gloomy and hopeful. “I bet your hands cramp up when you do your ‘devil horns’.”

You let out a laugh, gently shoving Seonghwa, “nope. It’s like a workout for my hands.”

Seonghwa chuckled, a look of adoration on his face as he looked at your smiling face, hoping this moment would never end and that you’d always be smiling like this.

The only person he dared to love in a title that forbade it.

Still, he wouldn’t turn back the clock to avoid you. He would turn back the time just to meet you again. And again. And once more.

“I love you.”

The three words, despite being just that, every syllable meant everything to you. It was rare, and not by choice. And it hurt almost as much as it filled you with euphoria.

You leaned forward, placing your lips against his, both of you cherishing every moment of the kiss you shared.

Unbeknownst to the two of you, someone had taken a picture of you two in the middle of the kiss, before the retreated, taking the evidence to the gods and goddesses.

▸

You ran as fast as you could to gate K-117, fear and adrenaline fueling you as you rang for Hongjoong, who appeared almost instantaneously at the gate. You ran through the gate and into his respective realm, pulling the gate closed.

“Hongjoong—!” You panted, tears brimming your eyes from the fear. Hongjoong already knew what happened before you could tell him the run-down of the situation.

“Where is Seonghwa?” Hongjoong asked, concern laced in his voice.

“He’s been detained. He willingly went with the angelic guards!” You panicked, unsure what they would do to him. Someone caught the two of you at the pond.

The only bright side was that Seonghwa still had a chance to be freed. The picture was obscured when being developed that his face or any distinguishing features weren’t visible.

You thanked the gods and goddesses for that.

But it was clear that you were the only other person in the picture.

“Why would he let them take him?! How the hell did they know it was him?”

Hongjoong knew you were upset, scared, and worried for Seonghwa. You knew you two broke the only rule a reaper had, but you couldn’t help but think about how innocent you both were.

“If he fought back, then he would really be suspicious… Y/N, what is your plan? You know what will happen…” Hongjoong frowned, a look of despair following.

“I… I don’t know.” You crossed your arms across your chest to calm yourself down. “Fuck! Why can’t they just ‘Yeosang’ me and send me to hell? Why do I have to fucking die?!”

You broke down into tears, knowing what they will do to you and probably Seonghwa if he confessed to being in a relationship with you. And everything inside of you hoped he wouldn’t.

“Did San—”

“No. He’s innocent. He wouldn’t do something like this to you or Seonghwa.” Hongjoong gently placed his hands on your shoulders to calm your shaking.

But nothing could calm you down after this.

“Hongjoong, you’re the only one that has archival proof of our memories. Please deny Seonghwa’s involvement with me. No one knows it was him in the picture, the gods and goddesses must’ve assumed— Please, this is the last thing I ask.” You pleaded, pressing your hands together as Hongjoong gave you an apprehensive look, deciding whether to accept or not.

“I can die, but please, not Seonghwa.” You added. Hongjoong tilted his head, a look of genuine remorse toward you as you begged.

“I can’t just lie… That’s a sin.”

“Is loving someone a sin too?” You remarked, your heart dropping to your stomach.

Before Hongjoong could respond, they found you, entering Hongjoong’s realm as the guards detained you, your hands chained behind your back as you were transported to the angelic realm beside Seonghwa, who was physically fine, but the second he saw you, you could see the glint of fear in his eyes knowing they caught you.

Hongjoong soon joined, his presence mandatory in finding out who the obscured figure was in the picture.

The God of Judgment stood before the two of you, examining your frightened expression.

“What is your relationship to each other? Bear in mind lying is a sin.”

You and Seonghwa glanced at each other briefly, afraid if you turned your head any further, they would see right through you.

“Friends.” Seonghwa spoke. “We are just friends to each other.”

In a different situation, those words would’ve hurt you.

But now? In the face of death? You were comforted, knowing Seonghwa wasn’t going to confess to the entire relationship that easily. Especially knowing he still had a chance at going free.

You nodded in agreement, “Yes. Only friends!”

There was a screen in the angelic courtroom that had the picture of you kissing someone— Seonghwa. Everyone knew it was you.

No one knew it was Seonghwa except Hongjoong and San, if he were allowed into the angelic realm to corroborate.

You looked at him with pleading eyes, then you noticed Jongho and Wooyoung, who you had only seen a few times before when escorting newly deceased.

They both seemed shocked by the whole thing.

“Is the other person beside you?” The God of Judgment’s voice boomed through the room. You quickly shook your head, hoping Seonghwa wouldn’t try to interfere or confess.

“No! Why does it matter? Falling in love with someone isn’t the end of the world!” You yelled, figuring if you were going to attempt to change anyone’s mind, it would be now and in the face of death.

“Love and death can never mix. Death can’t love anything without destroying itself.”

You struggled at the chains binding your hands behind your back, shaking your head.

“You’re wrong.” You cried, “You’re fucking wrong!”

“Bring them forward.”

Two guards pulled you before the God of Judgment, his intimidating demeanor making your skin crawl.

“Hongjoong, was the other person Seonghwa or not?”

And your mind raced, looking at him in an attempt to telepathically beg him to lie for you. Selfish, yes. But for Seonghwa, you would gladly be selfish if it meant he got to keep his soul.

“No.” Hongjoong spoke. For a moment, your ears rang. The deafening silence in the courtroom as you felt the time freeze.

“It was not Seonghwa… I don’t have access to who the other person was.” Hongjoong looked at you, trying so hard not to break down.

You were considered to be one of his friends. And his next words would tear him up more than you could ever know.

“Y/N destroyed that information… When they came into my realm.”

Seonghwa widened his eyes, the bottom of his eyelids brimming with tears. But he couldn’t say anything. Not without foiling everything and the three of you go down for breaking the one rule, but Hongjoong would be punished for lying.

It was ironic, how afraid of death you were in that moment. You dealt with death every day. Hell, you were death.

Every reaper was.

You didn’t kill anyone, but it was just the nature of your title.

It scared you.

“He’s telling the truth.” You spoke. Hongjoong forced himself to look away, afraid he would break down in despair and give everything away.

You felt the chains being detached, freeing your hands. You didn’t fight back, there was no use against the gods or goddesses.

“I will never tell you who it was.” You forced a smile directed at the God of Judgment. He shook his head, silently ordering two of his followers, who stood at both sides of you.

“That doesn’t matter anymore.”

It happened way less painfully than you expected. It was like you were floating, with tears streaming down your face. Everyone unsaid word, action that will never be done, and the life you’ll never see with Seonghwa.

You weren’t living, but with Seonghwa, you felt very much alive. His face was the first one you saw upon death, and it was the last you saw as memories of him flashed through your mind.

Seonghwa stared, helpless and in shock, watching as you fell limp as the God of Judgment encased your soul into a jar to be sent away where it would forever become inaccessible.

Seonghwa couldn’t breathe, forcing himself to contain his grief. And he looked at your hand.

Your middle and ring fingers pressed against your palm while your pinky, index finger, and thumb remained straightened out.

I.L.Y.

Seonghwa held it together until he was alone, the pain of losing you tore him up, an immense pain he couldn’t even begin to describe.

When he was alone, he ran to the pond where he shared your last kiss, gasping sobs as he collapsed to his knees in front of the pond.

Seonghwa gripped the grey grass as he shoved his face underwater, muffling the scream that came out next.

Seonghwa remerged, allowing himself to break down.

You were everything to him.

Somehow, that wasn’t enough.

Death can’t love anything without destroying itself.

You were right, he was wrong.

It felt like an injustice to you that Seonghwa began to agree with what he said.

Seonghwa was basically death, just as you were.

And he loved you.

And that destroyed him.

▸

San hesitated, a long expression as he waited at gate P-043. He held a canteen of a special tea he concocted, for the sole purpose of giving to Seonghwa as a form of consolation.

Seonghwa was there to greet him, a friendly smile adorned on his face when he saw San.

San felt waves of guilt, despite doing anything wrong. He held out the canteen, his arms shaking, thinking Seonghwa blamed him for your death.

“I’m sorry.” San watched Seonghwa smile drop, a look of sorrow taking over. Seonghwa accepted the canteen, the warm exterior being the only warmth he’s felt since before losing you.

“I know,” Seonghwa’s voice was quiet, the lump in his throat preventing him from speaking up. “You don’t need to be.”

San was torn between offering him a hug or just leaving him be. Guilt still clouded his mind.

“Hongjoong… He found the person who caused this.”

San didn’t feel any better. You were still gone and despite San’s loyalty, he regretted not being able to somehow prevent what happened to you.

▸

Seonghwa watched over your side of the realm for any newly deceased, even five centuries later, he never forgot about you. How could he?

He never got used to you being gone either. He still presses his middle and ring fingers to his palm, recreating what you once mistook for ‘devil horns’, but was actually a sign for I.L.Y., every time he enters your area of the realm.

‘I love you’.

The three words that never left his lips again.

Seonghwa entered your space, seeing something moving in the fog.

Then Seonghwa noticed the small dog, no older than one year old, trotting towards him. It’s tail wagged happily, tongue sticking out.

“Oh! Hey cutie! Are you lost?” Seonghwa kneeled, checking the name on the collar with one hand and feeding the dog a treat with the other. “Lucky?” Seonghwa felt a strange wave mixed with relief and despair when he read the tag.

“Nice to meet you, Lucky.” Seonghwa fondly smiled at the small dog, scratching it behind its ears as he fought back the lingering and unresolved pain he held in his chest.

The dog barked happily, circling Seonghwa. Seonghwa stood up, patting his leg for the dog to follow him in the distance to the rainbow bridge that opened up, sensing Lucky’s arrival.

The mist parted ways for him and the dog, as excited as it was.

“You’re a good dog.” Seonghwa grinned, petting Lucky one last time and offering another treat.

“Go. Hongjoong will take good care of you.” Seonghwa watched the dog happily bound across the bridge towards Hongjoong, who was kneeling and ready for Lucky to pounce into the Souls Keeper’s arms.

With a smile, Seonghwa stepped back, seeing Lucky run off to play with the other animals across the rainbow bridge.

Hongjoong and Seonghwa exchanged a wave towards each other before the bridge faded away and waited for another animal to enter Seonghwa’s realm.

In a moment of panic, Seonghwa rang the bell and summoned Hongjoong back. This time, the bridge didn’t appear and instead it was just Hongjoong.

“Why did you ring?”

“Let me keep Lucky.”

Hongjoong was taken aback but hesitantly shook his head, “what about—”

“Let me keep Lucky, please. It’s… All I ask.” Seonghwa repeated. Hongjoong pinched the bridge of his nose, a deep sigh as he gave in.

“Alright. You know it’s unethical for a reaper to stop a reincarnation, and I know it is.” Hongjoong looked off into the purgatory realm, seeing nothing but mist and fog for miles. “If we both agree that we recognize how unethical it is, then, fine. I will bring Lucky back.”

Seonghwa felt a sense of relief, watching Hongjoong open the gate to his realm.

“Wait!”

Hongjoong stopped and faced Seonghwa with his hand still on the gate.

“Luke?”

Hongjoong shook his head, “He’s been reincarnated.”

Seonghwa tried not to let his disappointment show, still grateful that Hongjoong agreed to let the other Lucky come back. But Hongjoong still saw right through his expression.

“Don’t worry. He lives with an elderly couple on a farm… He grew up with them.”

Seonghwa teared up, a smile formed on his lips, knowing Luke— Original ‘Lucky’, was living a good life.

And he heard your voice, having held onto that sound for centuries.

‘For a scary reaper, you sure are sentimental.’

#ateez x reader #ateez angst #ateez au #ateez imagines #ateez fic #ateez seonghwa x reader #ateez seonghwa #atz imagines #atz angst #atz seonghwa #fck im sorry in advance LMAO :(

25 notes · View notes

fintan-pyren · 3 years

Note

@ your last post

Honestly I’ve always had the headcanon that Biana was pretty close with Alvar prior to Neverseen. After all, they’re both the “forgotten children”, and it works in line with Biana being less angry than Fitz towards Alvar.

She likely witnessed the brunt of Alvar’s anger when she was younger, particularly towards their dad, and for her the betrayal was still a shock, but it made sense. She still sees of him as a person. An incredibly awful, evil person, but still a person. He was her brother, and she’s learned that she needs to forgive him. Not forgive in the sense of understanding his actions, and definitely not okaying them, but she can’t let herself hold that large of a grudge against Alvar in particular, because she doesn’t want it to tear her apart.

I love this take so much. It would definitely make sense if she and Alvar used to be close. Even though Biana and Alvar are both talented like Fitz, the fact that Fitz is the one helping Alden with the search (even though Biana would be capable of helping by now) definitely could make them feel unimportant. They'd definitely bond over that. And since that feeling of being forgotten is one of the things that drives Alvar the most, Biana would certainly understand him a bit more.

Though Fitz and Alvar also seemed to have a close relationship, it always seemed more of a mentorship/Fitz viewing Alvar as his hero situation. Fitz wouldn't have necessarily seen or recognized Alvar's flaws before Neverseen, so it would definitely be more of a shock to him.

So yeah. I definitely agree.

(Though another theory I have is that Biana has the same amount of anger towards Alvar as Fitz, but just retreats in on herself rather than expressing it outwardly.)

#btw i love receiving asks like this about keeper #love hearing about theories #kotlc

27 notes · View notes

fedonciadale · 3 years

Note

"they did a lot of things wrong, they are a walking dumpster fire, do not deny their crimes" and under it you tagged Hermione. What is she guilty of? If my ask sounds like: "How dare you touch my GiRl?1!!", sorry, not my intention. I really can't recall anything particurarly bad 'bout her. Awesome work here, btw 🤗😍 You have patience of a saint.

Hi there!

I wouldn’t say Hermione is bad. She is just absolutely ruthless and I like that about her, even though I would definitely not want to be at the receiving end of her wand.

She analyzes a problem and then she solves it.

Neville wants to prevent them from going to the save the philosopher’s stone? Petrify him although he is a friend.

Snape comes into the way of finally getting a solution to the Sirius Black mystery? Disarm him although he is a teacher

Getting harassed by an annoying journalist? What about mellowing her while she tastes life in a jar for a bit (we don’t really know how long she kept Rita there)

A secret student organisation might be found out, and everyone who is part of it is in danger of losing their wand? Jinx the list of participants to prevent that someone snitches (again we don’t know how long Marietta had those pimples, I’ve seen posts that she was scarred for life, but there is no evidence for that).

Nobody believes Harry? Blackmail the annoying journalist into making an interview.

Umbridge has to get out of the way so that they can try to save Sirius? Trick her into walking into the midst of a herd of centaurs

Ron might not get the position as keeper? Confund his rival

Ron does not notice her? Hex some birds to attack him

Her parents might be in danger because of Voldemort taking over? Obliviate them and send them to Australia

Hermione and her friends might be on the run during the horcrux hunt? Enchant a bag with undetectable extensions charms.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Not all of this is bad, and is certainly not described as bad. But to be quite honest, Hermione sees a problem, thinks about it and solves it and she has not many qualms about it. And this pertains to general problems, her friends’ problems and maybe most problematic of all, her own problems.

It makes her a wonderful trouble shooter, so to say, and I think it makes her relatable, and usually her reasons are relatable, but my personal opinion is that her “I am going to solve that problem no matter what” would make her a terrible, terrible minister of magic. Because she goes about that in an all rational way: She thinks: What would solve the problem? and then she just does whatever her answer to the question is.

I headcanon that she realizes this about herself as an older and mature person and tells her friends to hold her back.

Anyway I love her, and I tagged Hermione under that post just as a silent joke to myself. But you found me out. lol

Thanks!

#anon ask #Hermione Granger #She is ruthless #And yet I like her

17 notes · View notes

kirk-spock-in-the-impala · 4 years

Note

Wanna write about Geralt thinking he’s ugly like in the books? Everybody else thinks he’s scary ugly but I want him to feel the softness of our love that says he’s a handsome lil baby boy. You don’t have to. I just love the way you write and bet you’d come up with an amazing story with his self deprecation as a theme

OMG YES I DO. the books are awesome, btw.

PROMPT FILL: GILDED LILIES (on AO3 here)

Summary:

The world tells Geralt he’s a monster. Jaskier shows him he’s not.

CW: Geralt’s headspace; prejudice and xenophobia; deals heavily with finding oneself unattractive, so please read with care if you have issues with that.

Slightly canon divergent.

——————————

It wasn’t that Geralt wanted to be beautiful. No, he understood that only sorcerers gained beauty along with their inhuman powers, but he wished that he could have remained unremarkable in his looks. The distant memories of Geralt’s childhood told him he had once been perfectly average looking. A dark haired, dark eyed boy of middling height and build. Neither ugly nor handsome, he passed without comment wherever he had gone.

Among the boys at Kaer Morhen, looks were irrelevant to the training process, but even there, standing among boys ranging from Lambert’s strong, handsome features to the scarred visages of those struck by the pox in their youth, Geralt had felt neither confident nor insecure about his appearance. He was so normal, so average, that the thought to consider his looks never cross his mind.

The mutations changed that.

Not only was he one of the few boys to survive the Trial of the Grasses, but he was the only Witcher in history to receive additional mutations. Because of that, not only did he have a Witcher’s characteristic, unnatural, cat-like eyes, but his hair had been bleached white, his teeth elongated, his features sharpened, his very bones thickened to accommodate the enhanced strength afforded by his mutated muscles. The other Witchers had unnatural eyes that flashed in the darkness. He was nearly as much of monster as those they hunted.

Geralt understood the stark difference, the sheer hideousness of his appearance, the first time he left Kaer Morhen after completing his training.

Before, where he had passed without notice, now villagers pointed, stared, and spat. Gasps of shock, expressions of violent disgust, and whispers of “freak”, “mutant”, and “monster” dogged his steps. On his first day, passing through the village at the base of the mountain below Kaer Morhen, he’d heard an elderly peasant woman whisper to her companion, “they’re making them uglier every year, ain’t they? Those thrice damned mutant freaks.”

Compared to the havoc the mutations had wreaked on his body, the impact on his looks should have been insignificant. But it still hurt. Back then, he was young enough to still be idealistic. To still dream of being a hero, a knight protecting the weak and vulnerable in the world.

But the decades that passed showed him that dreams were not for the likes of him. The first time he saved a girl from bandits intent on stealing her virtue, he’d imagined she might be grateful. And she had been. Until she saw Geralt’s face. Then, she’d screamed and thrown her shoes, rocks, dirt, whatever she could lay her hands on at him until he’d retreated.

Once could have been a fluke. A terrified girl reacting to protect her life and her virtue from an unknown stranger. But it happened again, and again, and again. Travelers he saved on the road would chase him off once they got a look at who – at what – saved them. Aldermen who contracted him would curl their lips and sneer when he showed up to accept the contract, giving him the barest of details before hurrying him back out of town to complete his task, the only purpose for which his existence was tolerated. Villagers he’d saved from monsters would throw stones at him, chasing him out of town with vile words if he was lucky, and with pitchforks if he was not.

Geralt knew from the other Witchers that prejudice was common, as was a certain lack of gratitude from those served, but none experienced the depth of vitriol that Geralt suffered. Geralt had long since concluded that the difference was due to his appearance, his hideous, monstrous, inhuman appearance.

And so, he did his best to avoid human settlements. He limited his interactions to the bare minimum required to complete his contracts. He made sure to never raise his voice, to never show his anger. He was unfailingly polite and soft spoken when he was forced to speak. He kept his eyes averted and stayed in the shadows and corners of human settlements. He entered villages only when absolutely required, and spoke to innkeepers and merchants only when his supplies were utterly exhausted. He made sure to keep a supply of gold and precious gems on hand to compensate a healer in the rare event he couldn’t heal himself, knowing they would charge a premium for interacting with him, and even more of one if they were forced to touch him.

After nearly a century living in the shadows because of his monstrous nature, Geralt was resigned to his lifestyle. On occasion, in a quiet village that was more tolerant of him than most, he would take a chance and see if the tavern keeper would be willing to serve him. Every once in a great while, they were, and he would sit in the farthest, darkest corner of the tavern to nurse his ale in silence, hood up and eyes down, trying his best to blend into the background.

It worked well for him. He’d get to enjoy his ale and he’d yet to have a problem with the other patrons, if they noticed him at all.

But all good things must end.

In Posada, on a bright, sunny day before heading out to complete a contract for a “devil” (it was not a devil, but Geralt suspected it might be a sylvan), Geralt sat in his usual dark corner, enjoying a surprisingly good ale. The bard playing for the patrons crowded around the tavern’s large windows was as skilled with his lute playing as he was terrible with his lyrical composition, but Geralt let the words pass through his ears without listening to them, content to enjoy the music alone.

He was shocked to his core when the bard, having completed his set to a rain of bread and jeers, not only came up to him, but sat down. Geralt immediately stood to leave, head down to hide his face in his hood, taking his half-full tankard with him, when the bard stopped him. “I know who you are.”

Geralt froze. The tavern keeper knew, of course, but exposing his identity, his presence, could potentially cause a violent reaction amongst the tavern’s other patrons, who doubtless would want to clear him out of their space as soon as possible.

“You’re Geralt of Rivia.” The bard said, clearly pleased with his identification skills, and, fortunately, quietly.

Geralt leveled a quelling glare at him before he could stop himself. His face fully lit by the sunlight coming through the windows when he raised his head to do so. He took a quick glance around the tavern, seeing they’d not been noticed yet, and stalked out the door, leaving his ale behind, his rare moment of peace shattered. Luckily, he always paid in advance in case he needed to make a quick exit, so the tavern keeper let him go without comment.

Walking swiftly to Roach, he checked her tack before unhitching her from the post, leading her out to the road. As he moved to mount, he heard light, quick steps behind him.

“Wait!” The bard called out, lute banging on his back as he hastily stuffed bread into his shoulder bag, “I’m coming with you!”

Geralt took a deep breath, forcing himself to remain calm, to remain soft, inoffensive. “No, you’re not.” He said, mounting Roach and turning his head away from the bard.

“Yeah, no, I totally am. Meeting you is the most exciting thing that's ever happened to me, and I’m not going to let this chance pass by!” The bard said brightly, moving to stand at Geralt’s left stirrup.

Geralt heaved a sigh, looking down at the young man, and he was a young man, unsure whether he should be annoyed or pleased at his persistence in keeping Geralt’s company.

The bard looked up, meeting his gaze fully for the first time. “Wow, yeah, you’re gorgeous.” He said, staring up at Geralt with an expression Geralt didn’t recognize. Gorgeous? Geralt didn’t know how to respond to that, so he didn’t.

He kicked Roach on, setting her off at a quiet walk toward the village gate. Wouldn’t do to move any faster, no matter how much he wanted to leave this odd bard behind. Faster meant more attention. Faster was dangerous.

The bard kept up, walking more swiftly in his fancy shoes than he had any right to, chattering away about anything and everything, from his latest doublet, to some character named Valdo Marx, to how pleasing Geralt’s hair was when the sun hit it just so.

After a long hour of walking, followed closely by the young bard, Geralt arrived at the hill close to the site of the reported “devil”. He stopped and dismounted Roach, securing her safely to a tree branch with ample room to graze.

The bard trotted right up next to him. “So, where to next? I’m Jaskier, by the way.” He said, thrusting out a hand to shake.

Geralt just looked at it. No one had ever wanted to shake his hand before, but he wouldn’t play into whatever this bard – Jaskier – had planned by going off script.

He just moved on with his hunt, heading out to look for clues on his quarry’s location and identity, tossing a gruff, “stay with the horse” over his shoulder at the bard. If he couldn’t get the bard to leave him, at least he could try and keep him safe.

Jaskier didn’t listen. Not then, not after they eventually escaped from Filavandrel, and not for the next several months he followed Geralt all about the Continent, sharing camp sites, meals, and the occasional room at an inn. With Jaskier’s presence, one in every dozen innkeepers or so was willing to lend Geralt a room, with the understanding he was under the supervision and control of his human keeper. When he was alone, asking for a room was a useless exercise. Geralt wasn’t sure if Jaskier understood that or not, but he wouldn’t risk losing access to more frequent hot baths and comfortable beds by pointing it out.

The oddest thing about Jaskier though was not his persistence in following Geralt, but his persistence in complimenting him. It was always “your hair is so soft” or “gods, your eyes are to die for” or “you’re so attractive, it’s not fair.” More than that, more than those incomprehensible words, was the fact that Jaskier touched him. Freely and often. A pat on the shoulder, gentle hands combing through his hair while he bathed, a warm body leaning against his by the campfire. People didn’t touch him. Didn’t like to look at him. And yet, Jaskier did. Geralt didn’t understand it.

He knew he was monstrous; he knew he wasn’t fit for human companionship, and yet, Jaskier was seemingly unaware of that obvious fact. At first, Geralt had thought the compliments and the touching were all a great, cruel joke to Jaskier, but months of exposure showed him that Jaskier was as genuine as he was foolhardy, and he held nothing back when he felt Geralt did something that deserve censure. If Jaskier complimented him or touched him, it was because he wanted to, and that was beyond Geralt’s comprehension.

Geralt’s confusion, his frustration with Jaskier not following the script, all came to head when they were preparing to attend a fancy banquet, hosted by one of Jaskier’s friends from Oxenfurt, which Jaskier had convinced Geralt to attend as his companion. “I can’t just show up alone, Geralt!” Jaskier had said. “Besides, I can’t resist a chance to show off my lovely muse.”

As Geralt bathed, scraping drowner blood out of his white hair, Jaskier flitted about the room, laying out finery for Geralt to wear, commenting how nice everything would look on him and how jealous his friends would be when they saw him on the arm of such a gorgeous companion

Geralt couldn’t take it anymore. “Stop it!” He growled, turning a frustrated glare on Jaskier. “Stop saying things like that!”

Jaskier froze. He must have seen something in Geralt’s expression, because he immediately dropped the ribbon he was inspecting, one of his many choices to use on Geralt’s hair, and knelt at the side of the tub by Geralt’s left side.

He reached for Geralt’s cheek and Geralt flinched away, hiding his face behind a curtain of wet hair. Tension thrummed through his frame and his posture was abjectly miserable, fists clenched around the edges of the bath, knuckles white.

Jaskier frowned, uncertain where this upset was coming from, but knowing how reserved Geralt was, he knew the cause was substantial to create this strong a reaction in his normally stoic friend.

He reached out again and gently turned Geralt to face him. Geralt flinched, but didn’t pull away.

Geralt’s eyes remained firmly down, brows drawn together, shame flooding him. He’d shouted at Jaskier, growled at him like an animal, all over the little, innocuous lies Jaskier liked to tell himself about Geralt’s appearance. If he was lucky, Jaskier would simply leave. If he was unlucky, he’d be getting a visit from the guards.

“Geralt?” Jaskier prompted, concern clear in his voice. “Please, tell me what’s wrong.”

Geralt’s jaw clenched, daring a glance up at Jaskier before averting his eyes again. “Forgive me. I shouldn’t have shouted at you.” This time he did pull away.

“No, you shouldn’t have, but I’m more concerned with why. Have I upset you? Hurt you? Please, tell me.” Jaskier waited, watching as Geralt’s eyes darted about, jaw clenching and unclenching.

Geralt didn’t know what to say. This wasn’t how things were supposed to be. He had a role, a script, and Jaskier just came in and flipped the papers out of his hands, setting his own, improvised pattern instead. Geralt didn’t know what to do. What to think. He just knew it hurt that Jaskier kept giving him glimpses of his childhood dream, a dream he knew was forever out of reach.

But he had already behaved unforgivably, so he might as well get some information about Jaskier’s incomprehensible actions before he inevitably left. Could serve him well in the future if he ever met anyone else willing to tolerate him for more than a few moments.

Geralt drew in a breath and went for it, heart racing in his chest. “Stop saying things that aren’t true. I don’t understand why you do that.” He spoke to the bathwater, unable to look at Jaskier.

“Whatever do you mean?” Jaskier asked, anxious to ease the pain he saw on his dear friend’s face.

“You call me ‘gorgeous’, you compliment my hair, my looks.” Geralt shook his head, bewilderment evident in his tone. “I know it’s not true, so why do you keep saying it?” Geralt finally looked up, searching Jaskier’s expression, face lined with pained confusion.

Jaskier’s heart clenched in his chest, aching for his friend, for the decades of suffering that simple ask revealed.

He placed a hand gently over Geralt’s where it was clenched around the edge of the wooden tub, meeting Geralt’s eyes calmly. Geralt’s hand jumped beneath his, but did not pull away.

“Because it is true. You’re one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever met. And one of the most noble, to keep fighting to protect people who will never appreciate all that you do and all that you sacrifice.” Jaskier said, firmly and kindly.

Geralt shook his head sharply, looking away. He knew what he was.

Jaskier leaned forward to keep Geralt’s face in sight, thumb rubbing gently over Geralt’s clenched fist. “What do you think you look like?” He asked.

Geralt scoffed. “Like a monster.” He stated it like the indisputable fact he knew it to be.

Jaskier closed his eyes briefly, devastated to hear confirmed what he always suspected. Geralt had no idea of his own worth, his own beauty, having internalized for far too long the fear and hatred dumped on him by villagers unable to accept that something could be different and still be worthy.

Jaskier squeezed Geralt’s fist, reaching out with his other hand to turn Geralt’s face to his again. Holding his chin gently so he could not look away, Jaskier said firmly, “there is nothing monstrous about you.” Geralt huffed in disbelief, trying to avert his eyes, but Jaskier held him in place. “Your mutations made you unique, gave you the ability to do your job, to protect all of us from the real monsters. Your hair, your eyes, hell, even your teeth, they show the sacrifices you’ve made to protect our Continent. From a purely aesthetic perspective, you are stunning. But as a person, you are beyond compare.”

Geralt stared, unable to respond, unsure of what to say in the face of Jaskier’s firm belief that he was worthy, that he was not monstrous to behold. When he was young, he knew he was unremarkable. After his mutations, he knew he was a monster. Yet, Jaskier seemed equally sure that Geralt was neither of those things.

Jaskier saw the conflict in his friend’s face. He knew that one conversation would not change a lifetime of conviction. He gently leaned his forehead against Geralt’s, closing his eyes. “One day, you’ll believe me, and until then, I’ll remind you every day that you are worthy, that you are gorgeous, and that you mean the world to me.”

Jaskier pulled back, keeping his eyes locked with Geralt’s. Geralt saw nothing but calm assurance in Jaskier’s eyes. No matter how remarkable, how unprecedented his words, Jaskier believed them to his core.

Geralt didn’t believe them. He had nearly a century of evidence to the contrary. But if this one remarkable man believed him worthy, believed him beautiful, then at least in Jaskier’s world, Geralt didn’t have to be a monster.

#kirk-spock-in-the-impala writes #prompt fill #geralt of rivia #geralt #jaskier #dandelion #gerlion #geraskier #geralt/jaskier #it's pre-slash #so you could read it as gen #but why would you #soft!geralt #soft!jaskier #insecure!geralt #protective!jaskier #geralt's headspace #not a happy place

288 notes · View notes

alicemitch09writes · 3 years

Note

hey alice! i’m the *new suna stan* from before lol

thanks so much for the hcs!!! i enjoyed them a lot ❤️❤️❤️ i was also wondering, what would be manager’s dynamics with the rest EJP Raijin? Would it be the same as her dynamics with Inarizaki? i’m super into this world that you built in hyogo i cant even hahahah i also imagine what kind of friends manager has in uni and basically her whole journey to healing from her past 😊 i hc that sunarin probs gets jealous of some uni guy friend of manager for some reason or wtvr because jealous suna is *screeches*

do u have 🥨 anon already? if not, may i be ur pretzel anon 💕💕💕

awwww, pretzel anon it is! hello and welcome~

Honestly, those stories were half-made and half based on the real-life experiences of family, friends, or students of mine.

Soooo her relationships:

UNIVERSITY

Since it was a new town, she definitely took time to get to know people. However, a few people remembered her from her days as 'Inarizaki's Fox Keeper' players, ex-managers, and fans. She made a group.

However, her constant remains: Inarizaki seniors, Miya twins, and her family.

Also, her therapist's child just happened to be a senior at her university so they became friends. It was through him that she heard of an on-the-job-training/internship with EJP Raijin.

Some clubs tried to ask her to be their manager, but she kindly declined, wanting to focus on her studies first. She was, however, a consultant.

She befriended a few of her neighbors - each, from differing colleges and interesting backgrounds.

Suna doesn't have to worry much about her friends, because that one friend is Asexual, and the rest are in relationships.

EJP Raijin

The first person she befriended was Murase-san. Actually, her full name is Akira Murase, 7 years older than her, and was really good with PR. However, she's heard of Reader's reputation and was happy that she actually considered doing her internship with them.

When she added that she can speak 3 languages: English, Japanese, and her native language, that's when Murase-san decided then and there that she'd be her favorite person.

EJP Raijin team is....hmmm, I would say a mix between Kamomedai and Itachiyama. I'm saying this because I'm trying to recall my experience teaching students there (an actual school btw, or was it a university)

Also, as of writing I'm looking at the Wiki page of JT Thunder and wow, since I'm basing the team off them, the inspiration team is pretty reputable.

Anyway, they're all generally nice, competitive, passionate, and abnormally tall.

The team are nice enough and warmly welcomed her, taking an immediate liking to her after sharing her analysis on the team's play and points they could improve on.

Some of the players are family men, so they treat her like a daughter. Some are single men, who tried to hit on her, only to receive her poker face and cold stare. And some are foreign nationals trying to fit in and adjust, who usually cling to her almost immediately because of how she can understand them (think back to the scene with Aone).

Suna gets jealous at that, sending them cold stares and blocking them so hard during plays to the point that it was frustrating. But the rest of the team get a laugh out of it.

When she graduated university, it was honestly her own decision to work for EJP Raijin. And how could she not? The pay was good, as was the environment (after two years of interning with them), and she loved the thrill of the game. Also, she was dating one of their players.

The owner of the club has also taken a liking to Reader, which is why they got a discount when she and Suna were buying a car.

#alicemitch09 answers #time skip stuff #EJP Raijin stuff #pretzel anon

5 notes · View notes

theshinobiway · 5 years

Note

can i get a Neji imagine with him being jealous of the reader being so close to Sauske (as friends) btw love your blog💗💗

Good Golly Gee this took longer than I expected. First I had difficulty coming up with a setting and the plot for this scenario, so I ended up throwing darts at a board (metaphorically) and decided to roll with it. Thus, The setting is post-war Konoha around the time of “The Last.” Sasuke is back in Konoha (and had a decent redemption!) and Neji is alive, though he was heavily injured.

This is one of my rare times where I wrote it with a female reader simply because (most of my readers tend to be female or fempronoun-identifying) and the prose flowed much better with a specific pronoun. “They/Them” is sometimes difficult to portray as an intimately personal address. Can English just get a Gender-Neutral pronoun already? I’m open to creating other versions of this story with different pronouns if requested, just send me an ask!

That also being said, I have the mappings for a Part II to this scenario that I would be open to writing at a later date (I need a break from this one, lol.) If there’s interest, let me know!

Thanks as always for contributing to the blog! :)💚💚

Neji Hyuga — Untouchable Stars

“He just doesn’t get it!”

You slammed your drink down, the telltale blush of your night’s exploits covering your face as your best friend barely restrained a groan from his seat.

“He may not, but for the hundredth time the Hyuga’s too much of a coward to make the first move. You need to be more direct. Just ask him out, already.”

Sasuke shot you the side-eye from his seat as he coolly sipped his own drink, watching you down your third.

“And what if you’re wrong and he doesn’t like me?!”

“What’s not to like?” Your longtime friend gave you a small smirk.

Were it not for his current—secret—relationship with a certain pink-haired friend of yours, it might almost have been flirtatious. But, both she and you knew where his eyes were, and both of you could read him well enough to know loud and clear what every gesture of his really meant.

If only you could read the Hyuga just as easily.

“Oh? Go on…” You intentionally drew out your words, less from drunken slur and more from your disbelief that this was headed anywhere that didn’t end in an insult.

“Well, you’re great at a lot of things.” Sasuke shrugged his comment off, but it did much to lighten your mood.

“Really? Like what?!” You threw your glass down, now more than halfway convinced he was being serious.

Sasuke gave you his characteristic smirk for reassurance—the closest you could ever get to a real smile—and you were elated.

Until he opened his tactless Uchiha flapper.

He held up his hand to count. “For instance, confessing your sorrows to everyone in the vicinity, drowning in self-pity, drinking away your feelings…and making sure everyone in this bar and the few surrounding know that you have the biggest crush on N-“

Sasuke liked to think himself one of the most accomplished shinobi in the village.

But Sasuke was not more accomplished than a drunk, flustered you that currently had an arm wrapped around his neck before he could speak.

He tapped out within seconds, wheezing.

“What in the world—ugh—are we still children?!” He sputtered, rubbing his throat and reaching for his drink before deciding better. The burn of the alcohol wouldn’t help right now.

“Oh, sure! In that case, should I go around spouting off about your secret relationship?!” You fired back, punctuating your answer with an aggressive slurp of your drink and a boorish stare.

Sasuke hadn’t been public in the slightest about his relationship with his pink-haired teammate, though being his closest friend, you were privy to much that others weren’t. Sakura herself had respected his wishes to keep most of their relationship private. Naruto on the other hand…well, if there was anyone it would come from…

“You wouldn’t have the gall.” He grumbled, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Because I’m a good friend!” You sneered, downing the rest and raising your glass. “Another!”

“Seriously, are you going for a Mountain Round tonight?”

It was a common drinking game in Konoha. One shot for every Hokage, and every Hokage had an accompanying drinking song. Most tried to get through all of them on their twentieth birthday to celebrate their coming of age. If you didn’t stop soon, you’d be making cheers to your fifth—and passing out in the street like the fifth.

“I’m going for a number of shots that make me forget his name tonight!” You swung down your drink, letting the burn roll over your tongue. No matter how bitter it was, it couldn’t match you yet. “Let me know when I’ve stopped talking about him.”

“Done, and you’re done.” Sasuke took the finished glass out of your hand and set it on the bar, sweeping you away from the counter.

“Hey! I’m still walking!” You tugged at his arm, but you were out the door of the bar before you could make a scene. “I’m not sloppy—"

“That’s not the goal of a nightly outing, now time to get you home.” Sasuke grumbled, cursing the very man that put you in this state.

The situation had been the same since you were kids—you were head over heels, a certain someone was none the wiser, and Sasuke was left hearing all about it—but the only difference was that the complaining could now be, ahem, augmented by alcohol.

But Sasuke, being the great friend he was, managed to get you out of the bar and on the steady path to home and a restful sleep despite your struggling. On a separate note, you vaguely recalled that you were meeting someone else tonight, but for the life of you, you couldn’t remember who it was while you were being dragged from the bar whilst on the receiving end of a lengthy lecture from your Uchiha friend about your ‘limits.’

Sasuke liked to think himself the wisest of the two of you.

In any case, you weren’t exactly a fan of being manhandled—drunk or sober—so you decided to concoct the best plan you could to get out of his deathgrip on your arm.”

“Hey! What’s that?!”

”What?”

Sasuke was not more clever than a drunk, troublesome you.

No sooner had he fallen for the childish trick (which he would say later was the result of his own inebriation and not because you were actually clever,) you shot out of his reach and made a dash…straight down the steps of the bar.

“Ack—!”

And then, right when it seemed you would meet the ground first, a sudden familiar shout of your name brought you back.

“(Y/N!)”

Thump. Thump. Thump.

Just then, seconds before you bit the dust, and the whirlwind of movement brought your latent nausea to a not-so scenic ending, you were whipped back up to your feet and the merry-go-round of lights were kept steady enough for you to send an insult hurling back at—

“N-Neji?!”

“You’re…drunk?”

There was nothing more sobering than the realization that you might have made a fool of yourself in front of him.

‘Of all the times for him to find me—now, really?!’

You were held up by two strong arms and the last remaining shred of your dignity, but the look on the aghast Hyuga’s face told you he was waiting on an answer. In your best hazy stupor, you put your best foot forward and managed a perfectly elegant, coherent:

“I don’t know.”

Neji tilted his head, thoroughly taken aback—first by your sudden appearance in his arms, and now an answer that he had expected just as much. Realizing he might have been staring, he suddenly averted his gaze until Neji’s eyes flickered to Sasuke, who stood close behind. They narrowed immediately.

Neji’s arms held you in a firm grip, letting you a chance fully regain composure. Or what you could, with your arms interlocked with his and a small voice screaming in the back of your head.

Whatever chance you had of dignity was shot all to hell the minute you realized he was close enough that you could catch the characteristic scent of the Hyuga compound—aged wood. Without realizing it, you were unconsciously leaning forward into it. Luckily, Neji hadn’t noticed, too intent on staring down your would-be caretaker.

You couldn’t see Sasuke’s expression—you were far too absorbed in Neji, who hadn’t released his grip of you though had regained your balance—but with your extensive knowledge of the Uchiha, whatever he likely did was taunt the Hyuga with a look. Sasuke had a wonderful talent for ticking people off, and Neji was no exception—in fact, he took absolute pleasure in it sever since their first meeting.

Neji spoke first, clearing his throat and putting his practiced composure forward.

“Need I ask why (y/n) is currently in this state?”

Why was he always so irresistible when he looked so stern? You were practically drooling over him—but for some reason, the normally observant Hyuga kept his gaze ahead.

“Huh. Because she…can’t hold her liquor?” Sasuke scoffed back at the Hyuga. “I didn’t realize I was her keeper.”

Holding an inebriated you upright and staring into the face of a man that didn’t seem to take it seriously, Neji was less than amused at the snarky reply.

“And you let her get like this, or did you intend for this happen?”

“She can make her own decisions, as any other adult, Father.” Sasuke curled his lip back at him.

Neji took the bait. Sasuke’s cheeky grin was perfectly misconstrued—as Sasuke surely expected, and Neji’s grip on you unconsciously tightened as his eyes narrowed to slits.

“And just where are you going this late in the evening?” Neji snapped back.

Sasuke had always suspected another side to your ‘unrequited’ love for a while, but it wasn’t always clear. This, however, was an ample opportunity to test his theory.

The results spoke for themselves.

And while he was tactful enough to save your face in front of the object of your affections, playing coy to rile up a potential suitor was all part of his assessment of the Hyuga. Neji might have been a little too commanding in response for Sasuke’s taste, but Sasuke was also too much of a smart aleck to make things simple—no, if Neji was even remotely responsive to his insinuations, Sasuke was going to be just as curt and press him on.

All with the same smirk plastered on his face.

It was difficult to keep track of the conversation when you were in Neji’s arms. All the flush in your face couldn’t have been caused by alcohol—not at this point. In your daze, you caught a brief wind of Sasuke’s snide reply.

“I thought we settled this when we were kids, Hyuga…” Sasuke leaned forward, truth of the situation be damned if it meant he could have a chance to get under the Hyuga’s skin.

”I don’t answer to you.”

Sasuke knew of your affections and clearly could tell he has projected an image of the situation onto the Byakugan-user that was not so accurate—but at this point, perhaps this is what the Hyuga needed to make a move.

“Your arrogance becomes you, Uchiha.” Neji then shot back a taunting look of his own. “The only reliable quality about you, as it were.”

Relinquishing his grip, Neji managed to put you fully upright, facing Sasuke head-on. “A wonder you’re still friends with this one.”

“Neji, He’s just—" you were cut off almost immediately.

“Really? We’re still very close though, we’ve been friends for…how many years now, (y/n)?”

You stumbled over a reply, turning your head just enough to shoot Sasuke a look that screamed murder if he continued.

“A wonderful display of your friendship, tossing friends from balconies. You care to express your friendship elsewhere, perhaps with your pink-haired admirer? Perhaps if she heard of your recklessness, you might find yourself airborne instead.”

Neji clearly had no idea they were dating. Not that he really spent extended time around either of them to tell.

“Oh, and what would you know of her competence? Were you looking for an introduction?” Sasuke tilted his head, jeering at the man barely holding himself back. “Unfortunately, she’s—”

“Sasuke-kun!”

The heavens bequeathed a blessing to this gradually deteriorating situation in the form of Sakura, who was now hurrying her way up the street.

You forgot she had been invited to join you after her shift at the clinic.

“Sakura.” Sasuke smiled, a rarity from him. You were still startled by it now and then, which is why it caught your attention.

And Neji saw where yours went.

“Sorry I’m late, the patient needed extra bloodwork done—Oh!” Sakura noticed you and Neji, standing close together, and evidence of the Hyuga’s agitation was still clearing. It took all of a few seconds for Sakura to surmise what might have transpired moments before.

Perhaps in the future, Sakura’s social finesse could rub off on Sasuke.

“I’ll be taking him out of your way before he causes more trouble.” She nodded towards Neji, who looked ever so slightly more agitated than normal. You put your hands up defensively, trying to remember how words were formed as you battled the fog clouding your mind.

“Oh don’t worry about it, he’s been—”

“Oh, your face is so flushed!” She placed a small hand on your cheek and gave you a wink, grabbing Sasuke’s hand with her other, then glancing back at the Hyuga. “Neji, get her home safe, would you?”

Before the Uchiha could protest about her grip, he resolved already to let himself be carried off, letting you helplessly watch as they left. Sasuke gave one lest telltale shrug as they got further away, communicating all you needed to know.

‘Hey, I tried to help. Good luck.’

You flickered your gaze at Neji’s figure before looking away once again.

‘What the hell am I supposed to do right now?!’

Drunk you didn’t sign up for this. Sober you wasn’t too far behind.

And yet, the only answer you got was the accelerated beat that drummed through your ribcage as Neji stood close.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

‘Not only did he have the audacity to let her stumble around in this state, but it’s almost as if he was toying with the idea of bringing her home. Was the full attention of one of the more renowned kunoichi in the leaf not enough?’

He knew why the Uchiha might find interest in her. What he didn’t understand in all of his genius was the hold that Sasuke seemed to have over other women, even given his reputation.

‘The way that she gazed at him when he smiled at Sakura…’

He felt a familiar, painful curl in his chest when he saw it. That wasn’t where he wanted to see that kind of look directed. When he clearly saw the situation unfold with the Uchiha and the medic-nin in front of her, he felt the deepest empathy.

‘Unrequited.’

He clenched his fist. ‘She doesn’t deserve someone like that. She deserves far better than you.’

Sakura caressed her face, apologetically. ‘At least she can be courteous about it,’ he grumbled in his thoughts, knowing that all the kindness in the world couldn’t help.

When Sasuke gave an uncaring shrug in her direction, he was ready to snap the other arm off.

‘You have everything in front of you, and this is how you act?’ Neji watched your helpless expression as they walked off, and another pang of ache went through his chest until he gave one last glance to the offender’s retreating form.

‘How dare you.’

The sheer frustration of it all was enough for him to feel his blood pressure rise.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

The last of your efforts went into staying as sober as possible, hoping his wouldn’t be a night to remember for all the wrong reasons.

“Are you well enough, like this?” Neji’s voice cut you out of your trance.

“O-Oh, yes, I’m fine.” You shook your head frivolously to be more convincing.

Bad idea, because it only made you dizzier.

“I’m sure you aren’t unfamiliar with this condition.” Neji hadn’t meant for it to sound so harsh, but the line between straightforward and blunt was not so easily tread.

“H-Hey I’m not that kind of person! I just lost track of how many I had is all, but I don’t make a habit of it!”

Neji gave you a disinterested blink before he sighed, hands placed firmly on his hips.

“Relax, (Y/N). I’m well aware that you aren’t the kind to overindulge. I’m sure it was an accident. Regardless of how it happened, though, you ought to be escorted home.”

Neji paused, as though he thought better of the situation than before.

“Should I find you another…friend for that?” He gestured to the surrounding streets. It wasn’t necessarily dismissive, but it still had a bite to it.

That bite wasn’t meant for you, but himself.

You furiously shook your head. Drunk confidence egged you on, hoping you could somehow finesse the situation. You were determined to salvage as much of your reputation as the alcohol would allow.

“I can get home, y’know, if it’s alright with you…”

“Not a wise choice.”

You sounded confident in the moment, but Neji wasn’t convinced. And surely after walking a few blocks in one direction, future you would be agreeing with him. Which is why his immediate dismissal of the idea wasn’t surprising.

It couldn’t hurt to ask.

“Well wisdom could say you’re the…best choice, then?” You ended tentatively, but Neji’s brows lifted and the corner of his mouth twitched.

What had sounded vaguely like drunken rambling to you had actually…charmed him?

“Flattering.” He replied, flatly, though some amusement drifted across his face.

It wasn’t a clear acceptance, so you were ready to retreat until he turned his body and waved for you to follow.

“I haven’t forgotten the way, luckily for you. Let’s get going.”

You didn’t hesitate then.

A few moments of walking in silence passed before he looked over his shoulder to catch you timidly following, bunched up and holding your arms, last bastion of humanity devoted to keeping your body mobile.

“Are you.. cold…?” One of Neji’s hands drew to the string of his Haori without a second thought.

“Oh, I’m just still a little…” Embarrassment filtered from every hand gesture to the way you avoided his gaze. You started the night intending to forget about him. And now, here he was, walking you home.

Couldn’t he have found you three drinks sooner?

A sudden warmth around your shoulders snatched your attention from your pouting. Neji’s haori hung over you, still warm from his wear. Your face would have flushed further if the alcohol weren’t already occupying your face. The self-conscious posture tipped him off to your internal self-lecture.

“I already gave you my thoughts.” He reassured you for the third time that night, then, satisfied that you were warm, he took a moment to glance at how the fabric, meant to hang loose even on him, swallowed your frame.

The corners of his eyes crinkled for a moment before he turned to continue on.

“Still, the last thing I want is for you to think badly of me…” Were you whining? A bit, but more than anyone, Neji understood the importance of a good image. Therefore, he had no issue with a bit of sympathy slipping into his tone.

“One accident is hardly a threat to your reputation.”

“It wasn’t really an accident, though.” You twirled the hair at the base of your neck, wobbling to the side and out of the busy street.

Neji arched a defined brow in response and paused in long silence.

“Then what called for the occasion?”

You weren’t sure if the question was meant to fill the emptiness of the silent street, or to perhaps silence the overflowing thoughts of a quiet mind.

“Oh well, you know…” You blinked bashfully, looking away as a light dusting of pink—that didn’t originate from your inebriated state—decided to make its way to your face. “…just…thinking about the chances I don’t have with someone I really admire.”

There was something to be said for drunk honesty.

Unfortunately for Neji, not everything was said. Which meant there was always room for interpretation.

Or in his case, a severe misinterpretation.

“I see.” He clicked his tongue, averting his eyes forward as he let go of your shoulder. “Unfortunate.”

“You have no idea.” Crossing your arms over your chest, you wondered if he could read the subtext.

Gods, he can read everything from a faint twirl of the hair to the way you blink, can’t he just read your mind?

‘On second thought,’ —the realization struck when his gaze suddenly grew cold—‘perhaps it was best he couldn’t.’ One thought of that glare revealing itself unto you when you confessed was enough to make you retreat from your advances—even drunk you wasn’t that foolish.

Rather, drunk you was just sensitive enough to think better of a drunken confession that may have ended in a sobering heartbreak.

“I’m not so sure…” Neji didn’t mean to respond outloud, but all the better that you hadn’t heard him, too focused on the now beating heart that was going wild in your chest at the thought of him walking you home.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

Walking on the street was enough to set his heart alight. And, when the adrenaline was coursing through his veins and he was consciously aware that you might be more honest than normal, he couldn’t help but ask a more pressing question.

“Perhaps you would have preferred the Uchiha to walk you home?” He didn’t mean to be so curt, but the events from earlier put him his own self-depreciating mood. And he also feared a certain response.

“What? Absolutely not!” He half-heartedly glanced at your sudden outburst. Of course, you wouldn’t be brazenly open about your crush, but—

‘Hold on—where are the signs of denial?’

You weren’t kidding when you seemed to imply you were glad to be rid of him.

“I get enough time with him as it is—” Neji’s eye twitched.

‘I’d rather not be reminded of that.’

“—And I’d rather him spend his time with Sakura than worry about me.” There was a tinge of melancholy to your voice. To you, you were envious of how close they had become, wishing that for yourself.

To Neji, he heard that you wanted that closeness with him for yourself and let a pitiful smile, his split-second question subsided.

“How selfless of you.” He sighed. ‘I couldn’t even entertain a thought such as that, unfortunately.’

“Not really, I was lucky enough to spend time with you instead. It’s been so long…” You wobbled without meaning to, catching yourself on his arm as one step was simply too much for your body to keep up.

While you took a second to register, Neji’s attention was all on you at once and his arm stiffened of its own volition. Then, his face bled concern. Without meaning to, his hand covered yours, making sure you kept your grip.

“Sorry, I—Oh! They’re open early this year!” There were few things that could get you as excited as one certain treat. The colorful sign of the food stall flickered in the distance over the crowd, just barely legible in your blurry vision. He followed your attention in a second.

Neji let a small groan of frustration, knowing all too well your addiction to a certain stand’s seasonal delights.

“Home, (Y/N)—”

“Come on!” Neji’s insistence was futile the minute you snagged his hand. How could he protest an opportunity like this? He didn’t expect tipsy-you’s strength, either, judging by how easy it was to pull—ahem, drag him with you.

Could a heartbeat be felt in fingertips? With the way it resounded in his chest when you grabbed his hand, Neji might have thought so.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

“There, are you quite ready to go home now?”

“How are you so-ooo grumpy when you have the best thing in the world in your hand?!” You munched happily, letting the taste cover your parched mouth, washing away the lingering staleness of the alcohol from earlier.

“I had that earlier.” He grumbled, just out of earshot. He hadn’t intended to, but it was clear when he was agitated. You vaguely registered his speech, but you had other occupations—like the snack in front of you.

“Oh, what?”

“I said at least the food might sober you up.” Neji shook his head to snap out of his own thoughts and bit into his serving, rather unimpressed with the fare. But given that he was able to share it with you, he found ways to enjoy it.

The alcoholic haze that blurred your vision before gave the world a surreal, almost painted expression. Scenes that would not have fascinated you before were prime entertainment for the intoxicated. Lights danced around the street, peeking out from the silhouettes of the passers-by as they went about their ways, unconcerned for the magical visions that surrounded them. And Kami, and the smell of the food stands was enough to make you hungry for seconds.

When you found your way along the scene to the image of Neji beside you, serenely enjoying the evening bustle through the streets, you couldn’t help but reflexively swallow.

Was the taste always this sweet?

“Did I get some on my face?” In the moment it had taken you to consider why your snack was more delightful than usual, Neji had caught your rather obvious stare.

And you had been staring for an uncomfortable amount of time.

Cue a drunken panic.

‘Quick, something clever, something bold that you can maybe play off as a casual—’

“Ah, yeah, the uh…the cute! It’s all over your face!” You intended to wave your hand over your cheek for emphasis, but drunken limbs don’t like to listen—

They like to make you forcefully smack yourself in the face instead. Hard.

Nailed it.

Neji gave you a dead silent stare. Bewildered.

“I…what?”

Neji had just seen you stutter out an odd mix between a pickup line and a sincere answer, then whack yourself in the face. He was honestly doing his best to process the scene. His head tilted.

A stroke? Were you having a stroke?

“Oh, boy! Time for me to get home!” You shot up, tossing the remaining part of your container in the bin and were perfectly fine to hurry off to cover up your reddened face.

Your home wasn’t far from where you were, but Neji made sure to keep close eye on you—especially after that display. Somewhere in your racing thoughts you lambasted yourself for walking so fast, giving up precious moments that you never got with the object of your affections.

“It’s a bit darker down this way than I remember.” Neji called from close behind as your rounded into your secluded neighborhood. It was one of the few that managed to not be fully developed, and houses still stood a decent bit apart.

“There aren’t many lamps around here, so most of the light used to come from the sky…” You mused. It was an older part of the city, for sure, and you brushed your hand knowingly over where the railing to your steps would be.

But the tragedy was that the light pollution took away another relic of a bygone time.

“I always remember the stars being, well, brighter!” You sighed, turning back from the porch to ponder in thought as Neji made his way next to you, sure to catch you if you stumbled over the steps. “It’s hard to see some of them now, though, with how big the town’s grown. Even on the Hokage mountain now, the lights of the city tend to block out the sky…” Leaning back over the porch railing, you shot him a half-hearted glance. “Do you remember the time we watched the stars as kids?”

“Mmm…There were a few times, as I recall.” He sounded vaguely bemused but gestured at you to come away from the railing. Not a bad idea in your state.

You perked up immediately. So, it wasn’t just you that remembered.

“And how it all kinda began just…by chance?” Your legs moved automatically for you, responding to his beckon while the last remaining braincell attempted a coherent conversation.

The nights spent with Neji, legs thrown over the side of the mountain as you spoke about life, dreams, and all that stood between were the perfect picture of your teenage years. You had taken a walk that summer evening after your teammates had gone home and found yourself in the northern grounds above the Hokage mountain.

There wasn’t much development on Hokage mountain back then, save for the arena that the final rounds of the Chunin exams were always held in, along with some miscellaneous work buildings. Past the arena, the mountaintop still remained wild as ever. It wasn’t a prime spot for foot traffic, despite the view.

Of all the places for Neji to find you, the cliffside overlooking the village was a peculiar spot in the nighttime. Not the place one would expect a familiar face, but then it happened, and so it was. You thought the only reason it ever happened was by sheer possibility.

“Until it wasn’t.”

You glanced curiously at him, wondering what he meant. As kids, there were a few occasions he had asked if you would be making your way there that night, and if his presence would be welcome to join.

It fell off in routine soon after he was promoted in rank and his duties more than doubled. Then you assumed it was just meant to be the past, that he had other things to occupy his time. You may have grown apart some in those years, but you always wondered what he remembered about those nights.

“I mean…our conversations were…productive.” Neji cleared his throat into his fist. “It was a nice change of routine.”

‘Productive? Routine? Who else would describe childhood memories like that but him?’ You nudged his side with a small grin dancing on your face, startling him. Of course, he drew himself back into his stoic shell when he realized you were teasing him.

“You could just say you liked spending time with me then.” Leaning over, you shifted once more to place you both back within the same distance.

Neji’s straight face refused to betray him, though by what might have been a trick of the light, you thought you saw his face flash a bit of color.

“I wouldn’t be that blunt.”

“Then say it pretty.” You knew you were obviously giving him eyes right now, but a flustered Neji was too much to pass up on. He saw it, but doesn’t mean that he believed it was too serious.

“You need to get rest if you’re speaking like this.” Neji ushered you back inside with a grunt, waving you inside before you could embarrass him further.

“Say it…!” You pressed on, perhaps being a little too cute for your own good.

Neji knew he wasn’t about to get out of this one. He swallowed, looking for every conceivable method of escape before resigning himself.

“I wouldn’t be opposed to another visit sometime…for old time’s sake.” If you weren’t drunk, you might have picked up on the tinge of hesitation in his otherwise self-assured and carefully worded response. Hesitation—not reluctance.

Your eyes lit up immediately at the invitation.

“Yes! Yes, yes, yes!”

You intended to give him an impulsive hug, but your inebriated body’s translation of the thought was closer to a full body slam.

Thus, Neji forgot how to breathe—and your grip wasn’t very tight.

“Oh, ow—is it really that…exciting?” He managed to free the arm that had been wedged between you and the porch and placed both of his hands prudently upon on your shoulders.

He wasn’t sure if he was meant to ask a question in that moment, because it brought your face up close to his.

Much closer than it had ever been.

For the second time that night, you found your way into his arms, pressed against his chest in your inebriated haze. He was so warm against the cool night air, and you got lost, looking on his expression for every hint of his thoughts right then. There was too much to be said, but you didn’t want to come back, lost so far in the moment as you were.

Dreams weren’t ever as good as this.

Long, dark strands of hair fell around his face, tickling yours as he held onto you, making you forget he had even asked a question. Because right now all you could think about was that…

“You’ve always had the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen..” You couldn’t help the smile that you meant for him.

Those beautiful eyes in question widened in shock at your words, and his world silenced when you did.

Save for the heartbeat—was it his or yours?—that reached his ears.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

The deafening pulse of blood in his ears was all Neji could hear. With his eyes locked on your lips, the uncomfortable realization that his body was not within his control for some strange reason took over his rational thought.

Then again, he also wouldn’t admit to himself that it was due at least in part to his proximity of the source of those honeyed words, either.

The playful glint dwelled still in your gaze, then in the corners of your smile until it dropped, as quick as a light could be put out with a flip of a switch. One he struck down with his pesky self-denying habits before he remembered how foolish it was to wander in the dark.

“You’re intoxicated.” He swallowed and finally spoke bluntly, setting you upright.

When your hands didn’t displace themselves from their grip on his shirt, he grimly reached for them. He couldn’t allow himself to hope for what he knew was truly not meant for him.

But in that moment, the first murmur of doubt crossed his mind.

It whispered in his ear when his hands reached yours—they were so small compared to his—and passed over in the soft light in your eyes. One that didn’t come from the street lamps, the mirroring of the shop windows, or even from the moonlight.

It was his reflection, and he never thought he could be so bright—until he saw himself through your eyes.

Dreams really weren’t as good as this.

Neji’s voice lowered to a whisper, somewhere between talking to himself and to you.

“What are you thinking right now?”

It was pretty simple, actually. It was the same thought, every time you saw him cast against the night sky the times you met then, and even now. You let the years finally come and speak their due.

“I always thought you alone were brighter than any of the stars.”

It wasn’t often Neji was without retort—and even if he happened to not respond, it was on his terms. Those offending lips rendered him speechless, and he lowered his head as if closer inspection would reveal just how.

And when they rose to the occasion, he fidgeted once, twice, wondering if this really wasn’t a dream, if those few centimeters were really all that were left between you, and if he really was leaning down to close that distance.

In a dream could he feel the warmth, the weight of you in his arms, or the way in which you drew to him? Could he see everything he wanted so clearly in this one glance, as though the stars had dropped from the very heavens to light the eyes that gazed at him with this adoration? If in a moment, the night air wouldn’t disappear at once with the smell of the dried grass, the fallen leaves, and the smell of sake—

Sake.

“You’re drunk.” Neji whispered hoarsely, drawing back at once and shifting so that your head was closer to his shoulder. He hadn’t wanted you to see the expression on his face right then.

You panicked, heart racing at the tide of events that shifted within seconds.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

You buried your face in his shoulder, too embarrassed that what was nearly a romantic moment had ended this way. It wasn’t clear how he had meant what he said, after you had clearly—in your mind, clearly—been trying to kiss him.

‘You’re drunk, and you’re acting foolish’? That seemed far more like him than any alternative.

“Sorry…” You murmured, barely audible with your face in his chest.

Still, he held you for few precious moments, perhaps letting this embrace be his only selfish action for the night.

“You need rest.” Still, he didn’t move quite yet. You didn’t, either.

“I know…” Reluctantly, you drew away from him, avoiding his gaze. Neji shifted his weight, politely opening the door to your home for you and ushering you inside.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“What?” You blinked, your head still spinning from earlier.

“The…stars…?” Oh. Obviously! Still, Neji looked genuinely concerned. You immediately moved to compensate for your memory.

“O-oh, I thought you meant earlier as in…” You waved off furiously, trying to remember how to speak. Neji thought he had missed some unspoken courtesy and just as hurriedly racked his brain to figure out where he had faltered in his propriety.

“I could check on you in the morning, if it be necessary?”

He wouldn’t tell you that any hour could be yours, if you only just asked.

But you would have been too modest, anyway.

“If you aren’t too busy, I think…well, you’ll probably be busy, you have so many important things and—” You rambled on, not sure where the aim of it was, fidgeting with your hands. “—I don’t want to ask you to—“

You stilled only when Neji caught your hand, bringing it to his face.

He pressed his lips to your knuckles, turning his eyes to meet yours. You flushed, feeling his breath still ghosting on your hand. He might have said every word you ever wanted to hear just then in the way he looked at you.

“Tomorrow. Goodnight, (y/n).”

And when he left, you sank down to your bed, hand on your chest, your heart playing those words, unspoken, but felt in your chest.

Thump. Thump. Thump.

#naruto scenarios #naruto headcanons #neji hyuga #neji #scenarios #theshinobiway #the shinobi way #jealousy #jealous #character x reader #IT'S FINALLY DONE #THANK GOD

228 notes · View notes

justlightthefirstspark · 4 years

Text

As promised, my analysis/opinion/thought piece on today’s MUWFC game vs Spurs. Everything is chronological which I feel like should go without saying but in the interest of clarity 🤷🏽‍♀️ but not everything is tagged to the minute cause I am an idiot that didn’t realise that that would be helpful til like the 2nd half. Also, if I missed anything, or got players mixed up or anything pls lemme know and I’ll edit accordingly! I’ve never really done any from of sports based writing before (I don’t think tweets count lol) so pls be nice, merci 😘

Line up as follows, I guess this is pretty common knowledge but you know, coherency and such.

Tbh it was kinda hard to see *a lot* of this game, especially on the far side of the pitch and by both goals because of the weather, felt like I was watching Silent Hill for a little while there, but I did my best. My wifi is also horrendous atm, and we all know that the FA Player can be problematic so there’s a very good chance I might have missed something due to a lag or buffering btw. Just drop me an ask if you notice anything that mightn’t be quite right, and I’ll fix it asap! Some ~analysis~ (if you could call it that lol) is more detailed than other bits cause there was a lot happening and today I learned that it’s kinda hard to write one thing and watch another at the same time lol

First half:

Quick, fast and almost successful start. A much-needed improvement on the stagnancy vs Bristol a few weeks ago, and obviously we couldn’t see the midweek game vs Brighton so I can’t compare them.

I have to say I’m not a massive fan of all the back passes, all the time. I think a more attacking FB might be needed in the summer, or maybe Ökvist should be given some time to acclimatise to the WSL soon? I was never the biggest fan of Harris last season, I personally don’t think she’s fast enough – she gets outpaced down the flank by attackers 90% of the time, which isn’t good. I think A. Turner is the strongest FB option currently, at least defensively, and she’s shown she has a decent attacking ability, and has a wicked long ball, as well as crossing. My only issue is sometimes those tackles of hers can be a liability, giving away unnecessary fouls. It’s almost like she doesn’t think before she flies in sometimes, which is a shame, cause I love them. A lot.

There were a couple of really good chances in the first half, including a great ball in and run up from Galton, which should have resulted in probably the opening goal but whether it was as a result of the weather or just misjudged timing and placement from both Ross and Sigsworth, the chance went to waste. Groenen had an excellent chance to net her first for United but unfortunately sent it just wide. Another glorious link up between A. Turner and Galton led to another decent chance, a gorgeous cross in from the right to the opposite side of the box, and the perfect header which unfortunately was aimed straight at the keeper. Very unlucky to head in at the break with nothing.

There was an incredible double save from Earps around halfway through the first half. I have to say, I have some anxieties with her sometimes. She is quite good, but has a tendency to make some silly mistakes, and doesn’t always make the right call for a save. But my god she was on her game today, even if a potential error might have led to the first save. Didn’t disappoint me anytime she was called on this afternoon.

A few frustrations started to show around the 30 min mark, a few sloppy passes and challenges making the rounds. It was also around this time that I realized I’d picked a pretty poor game to start this thing on because I could barely see anything.

Zelem seems to be back in form, which can only be a good thing. But I would very much like it if somehow she could drag some of the other girls back up with her.

There were a fair few soft calls going Spurs way, which I wasn’t entirely convinced by. But then again I’m probably just naturally biased towards my girls.

Another great ball in to Sigsworth from A. Turner which was just *chefs kiss* but unfortunately came to nothing. There was also a spin move either to commit or avoid a challenge, I couldn’t really tell tbh, which was very impressive, as was her chase down on Mitchell at around 43 mins. (Amy’s my favourite player, can you tell?)

Booking for Kirsty Smith just before half time, but I gotta be honest I couldn’t see it due to the fog, so I have no idea what happened. Couldn’t find anything about it in the United post-match report either so apparently we’re just deleting that from the history of the earth which is completely fine by me to be honest.

Second half:

My main takeaway from this game is that both Sigsworth and Ross always seem to be looking for the same ball in the penalty area, and there very rarely seems to be anybody else around looking for a potential rebound. I think that James (who missed today’s game due to suspension) seems to be our main (only?) front line creator and finisher; Sigsworth is fine, that girl works like a dog and always gets the job done, I think she may have just needed another goal to boost her confidence, but I have no real concerns with her. Ross, however, I’m not entirely convinced by, I think a lot of her finishes have been a bit lucky and flukey so far. I’d start Toone over her for the rest of the season to be honest, Ross hasn’t done anything that tells me she deserves the starting place. Feel free to disagree with this of course, this is just my own personal opinion.

56 mins – confusion has entered the chat. McManus ends up pretty much through on goal, and then the ref whistles for what I assumed to be an offside. So naturally I nearly kicked my laptop out the window. The ref then awards a United penalty, and I’m even more confused now than I was in the beginning. I genuinely didn’t see anything but did hear a few shouts from what I’m assuming was the United bench for handball, so I have no idea what happened here.

‘58 – GOAL. Who else? God bless Katie Zelem is all I’m saying.

‘61 – Hanson 🔁 Ross. I think this was a good swap. I don’t think Ross was particularly good today, and Hanson immediately sparked that RW. I would have subbed Ross off sooner but that’s my only issue.

’64 – GOAL – Sigsworth with a pretty perfect if slightly scruffy strike from a corner.

A much better corner than previous attempts, and Spurs hadn’t defended any of them particularly well. I think that we have a major issue with set pieces, I dunno what exactly the problem is, whether they need to allocate a new taker or whatever but before today had we scored from a corner all season? Lemme knowwww.

’65 – A few decent chances for Spurs around this time. One pretty clear run in from the right, and one or two shots bounced right of the crossbar and the post. Basically my heart stopped for about 8 mins.

’66 – I DO NOT WANT TO SEE BACK PASSES IN THE BOX AS OPPOSITION PLAYERS SWARM IN. CLEAR IT. I DON’T CARE WHERE IT GOES JUST GET IT OUT. (sorry for the caps but my anxiety was out in force this afternoon)

United started playing much better after both goals, think they just needed a kick up the arse. *Ahem* A confidence boost. 👀 Much better intensity for the final 30 mins than the previous 60 imo.

’68 – Another decent chance for Spurs, with Earps coming way too far off her line than sat right with me. Very lucky nothing came of that.

’69-72 – Around this time I started to get *very* confused between Amy and Abbie cause they both had yellow boots on and literally the only thing I could see on the far side of the pitch was feet. That was fun.

’73 – The wasteful corners made a return. Slightly less panicked about that one considering we were already 2-0 up but still, I would like to see the glaring set piece issue sorted asap thanks girls x

’75ish – Toone 🔁 Groenen. Man I love Jackie Groenen. She really has been immense for us so far, and there’s a definite difference in how we play without her.

’78 – Harris 🔁 M. Turner. I’ve said my piece about Harris above but man, can we take a second to appreciate Millie Turner. She never, ever stops. Literally the heart of our defence.

’86 – GOAL – Oh captain, my captain. Beautiful strike from a free kick just outside the box, with the perfect bend around the wall and subsequently the keeper to make it 3-0.

United were very obviously stronger in the second half, almost looked like a completely different team at times. Whether they just got the hairdryer treatment at the half (I would imagine Casey is terrifying when she’s mad.) or the goals gave them that spark they desperately needed to kick on, they definitely made up for all the missed chances in the first half.

’90 – 4 additional minutes.

’92 – Another United free kick. McManus found herself almost clear in (again!), but due to an unlucky fumble with the ball at her feet unfortunately nothing came from this one. Surely a 4th goal otherwise.

’93 – FIIIIIIIIGHT. Kinda. You love to see it. Spend a little while conducting some, scientific research 🌚 and have concluded that Toone was tackled from behind just as the ball left her feet, which led to the ~scuffle~. Have to say that Amy walking away with Ella was extremely 🥰🥰🥰 (This is my research - https://twitter.com/48hours8/status/1218896406020349953?s=21)

’94 – Red card for Tooney. I would assume for her reaction more than anything but the camera didn’t catch it so I guess we’ll never know. I would have thought a yellow would suffice, considering that’s all the Spurs player in question received, but apparently not. 🤔 I’m still kinda confused tbh.

’95 – Full time.

Thus concludes what was certainly an interesting match. Please enjoy this comparison of United vs Spurs chaotic energy from @danieljamesmufc

Also thanks for reading if you got this far, it’s a bit stop-starty and clunky cause I just wrote down thoughts and whatever as they came into my head and then pieced it all together later on. I also just wanna say that I was massively impressed with Smith today. She hasn’t had many chances to prove herself this season, but that combo of herself and Galton down the left was lethal today imo. 🔥

Some extra thoughts:

I’m not a huge fan (like, at all) of fans singing men’s orientated chants. Let the women’s rivalries develop on their own, in their own way, and don’t drag the vulgarities across! That said, I do think that particular group of United fans has the potential to be a very, very good thing.

Also, just wanna say that these are my girls, and I would die for every single one of them. None of my criticism is meant to be intentionally negative, I just tried to be as objective and realistic as possible, without being a fangirl lol. Even my faves aren’t immune to criticism unfortunately.

And this picture is now my favourite thing ever to exist

#that was actually pretty fun to write #living for katie and jess scoring in the same game #this took longer than i care to admit #pls be nice i’m fragile lol #muwfc #manchester united women #my writing

10 notes · View notes

chantelle-x0x · 6 years

Text

Shades of Grey - Chris x MC

Masterlist

A/N: This took a long while. But it’s done! Part 2 is done! Okay, but like, it’s really sad and I suggest you get tissues. Maybe not as sad as part 1, but still really sad. I truly hope you enjoy this, and read part 1 if you haven’t already. Also, I hope this is a better version of what happens after the accident. The aesthetic is mine btw

Black World (1)

Tag list: @the-everlasting-dream, @choicessa, @mariawalkerwrites, @lilywoood, @ihearyoucallmyname, @mfackenthal, @gracepedia, @syltti78, @starstruckpixelberryhistoryvoid, @drakelover78, @obviouslyoleff

I’m taking requests for fics. Those of you that have requested a fic, it is in the makings! If you would like to request here are prompt lists - 21 Writing Prompts 50 Dialog Prompts Angsty Dialog Prompts Kiss Prompts For Writers and Artists

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in the fiction. All rights go to Pixelberry Studios.

Word count: 2,073

Pairing: Chris x Ariana Mayfield (MC)

Song Paring: Can You Hold Me - NF ft. Britt Nicole

Rating: M (mature)

Warnings: Angst, sadness, despair (get your tissues if you haven’t already)

Summery: Chris has temporary amnesia, and Ariana is the very last thing on his mind, so far back that he can’t remember her, so what happens when they both part for the first time since the accident.

Her heart dropped to the floor and shattered into millions of pieces. He didn’t recognise her. The past two years were nothing to him.

“Y-you don’t?” Tears formed in her eyes, and she choked on her own words.

“Alright Chris,” the doctor started as he made his way back into the room, “what’s the last thing you remember?”

“I remember Nicole. She and I broke up, more like she broke up with me after things didn’t go the way she wanted. I wasn’t enough for her.” Chris looked down, then back up after taking a breath. “And I got accepted into Hartfeld University on a sports scholarship.” His eyes flicked between both the doctor and his mother. “Why are you asking me?”

Ms Powell took hold of her sons hand and looked him in the eyes. “Sweetie, you were in a car wreck and you got out with a concussion. You have temporary amnesia. Something may trigger your mind to bring all that information back. It may take longer than we want, but it will most likely happen. You’re in your Junior year of college.” His eyes widened. “I know this is a lot to take in baby, but you’ll get through it.”

“Miss Mayfield, may I speak with you outside?” Ariana nodded, wiping away the few tears that fell onto her cheeks.

She left the room, taking one last quick check on Chris.

“Given the information we have received from Chris, he doesn’t remember college. Therefore, he doesn’t remember the relationship he shared with you. I know that it hurts, but what we have to ask you, may just help him, even if it’s for the moment.”

“Of course! I’ll do anything that will help. Or at least give him a chance to remember us.”

“You may not want to do this, but, we ask for you not to tell him that you’re his girlfriend. It might cause an unnecessary relapse and we don’t want that. Instead you could try, best friend in college that lives with him?”

It took her a moment to process it all. College best friend who he lives with. “Uhm, I’m sure I can say that. If it will help him.”

“It will.” The doctor confirmed.

“Then I’m in. I’ll say it.”

“Thank you so much for your cooperation Miss Mayfield.” The doctor thanked, before going into another room.

Ariana headed into the room which held Chris.

“Hey there.” She smiled.

Their friends had gone home, for sleep and rest.

“Hi.” Chris smiled back.

“I’ll leave you two alone for a few minutes. I’ll get you some more water sweetie.”

Ms Powell left and the room felt silent, besides the heart monitor’s continuous beep.

“So, I’m guessing you’re not a doctor?” Chris said, a questioning tone in his sort of statement.

“Um, no.” Ariana laughed a little under her breath. “I’m actually one of your really good friends from college. We live together, or will soon.”

Chris was silent for a moment, like he had been holding his breath before she answered his question.

“Okay, good. I just wanted to make sure you weren’t my girlfriend or anything. I wouldn’t have wanted to let you down if you were. I know that as my friend, it must hurt that I can’t remember you at all, so I guess I was worried that if I was dating someone, it would hurt even more.” Chris stated.

It felt like her heart was breaking over and over. Completely. Over and over again.

“Nope! Not your girlfriend.” She sang, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Chris was silent for a while until Ariana broke the silence.

“What’re you thinking about there Cap?” She didn’t know whether or not he knew he was the captain of the football team, secretly hoping he knew so she didn’t have to break the news to him herself.

“Cap?” - “I, uh, I mean. Okay, how do I approach this?” - “That I am captain of the football team? I know. Mom told me earlier.” - “Okay, good, because I’m not sure how I would've told you.” Chris laughed his warm laugh.

“Ah, I’m sure you would’ve found a way. From what my mom said, you’ve been here for a while, so I guess we are close, so if anyone other than my mom told me, I’m sure you’d be the one to.” He smiled warmly at her and her eyes filled with liquid.

“Uhm, so, do you know when you’ll be able to go home?” Ariana asked cautiously, blinking back her tears.

Chris’ eye flickered from hers to the ground, then back to her eyes. “They said I’ll be released tomorrow. They just have to run some final tests to make sure I’m okay, and then I can go home to AJ and Kyle, and also be able to help mom around the house.” Ariana smiled softly, enjoying the way his face lit up, just by talking about his family.

“So, I take it you’re looking forward to it?” Ariana asked.

“Definitely! I can’t wait to be with my family! I have the break and that’s enough time to reconnect. I just can’t wait to talk to AJ. She and I are so close. Don’t get me wrong, I love Kyle, but he and I just don’t get along as well as AJ and me. She and I, we just get each other really well.” Ariana smiled at Chris. He looked so happy and excited.

How she wished he could remember everything. How they spent the night under the stars after they realised how much they meant to each other, then being together on a boat, and her fondest memory of them being the ‘Spring Dance’. She and him were like two half being put together to make a whole. Even through all their problems, they worked it out. Now, she was alone. She didn’t have anyone to talk it through with. No one would understand. No one could understand, because they were made for each other. And she wasn’t supposed to feel abandoned and alone. She was supposed to be wrapped in his arms, being held by him. They weren’t supposed to forget everything. And maybe he would never remember her. But that only made her more anxious, and have even more weighing her down. She’d carry around all those fond memories, and he’d be with someone else making new ones. New ones he’d remember. New ones that wouldn’t be forgotten. New ones that he’d have, with someone he loved. Someone that wasn’t her.

“Hey, are you okay?” Chris asked, a little concerned.

Ariana breathed out quickly, and felt tears sting her eyes. She couldn’t cry now. She breathed out again, and opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. Just the distant yet near sound of her breaking. She took a deep breath once again, and blinked back the tears that were on the brink of falling.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Her voice wobbled as she faked a smile.

The doctor came back in with Chris’ mother and Ariana left. She couldn’t just stand there and pretend to feel okay anymore.

After a few hours, Ariana had gone home, and wrapped herself up in a blanket. It was really hard for her already, but being alone in the house only made it worse. Her thoughts were consuming her and she felt herself start to drown in all the worry and fear. And the little voice in her head that blamed her for everything, didn’t stop telling her what should have happened. That it should've been her.

Her mother Angela came into the house calling her daughter, and when no answer was there, she went up to her room and found Ariana curled up on her window seat, in a blanket looking outside. It wasn’t cold, but Ariana had the shivers.

Her mother sat down beside her and wiped away a tear that fell down her daughters cheek.

“You can’t change what happened my dear. And you can’t blame yourself for it either.”

Ariana sniffled and nodded. “I know mom. But it’s really hard! I love him! And him not remembering who I am, it’s killing me inside.”

The older woman wrapped her arms around the younger girl tightly. “All things will get better one day. He’ll love you again. Anyone with half a working brain will find their way back to an amazing woman like you.” Angela said smiling softly.

“And if they don’t?” Ariana asked, another tear slipping down her face.

“And if they don’t,” her mother brushed a strand of wet hair behind her ear, “you weren’t meant to be. And you will find someone even better. But I know for sure that Chris is a keeper. He loves you, and he’ll find his way back to you.” Ariana smiled before leaning against her mothers shoulder.

“Please just hold me.” Ariana whispered.

And arms wrapped around her again, not intending to let go for a while.

Meanwhile, in Maine, Chris had been released and back home with his family. Nicole dropped by, but his mother shooed her away. AJ was worried, but Ms Powell, didn’t say anything much to her two younger kids.

Chris played football with Kyle and AJ, but AJ missed the stories about him and Ariana. He use to tell them all about the secret trips they’d take during school, and how they’d sneak away from parties just to be together. AJ hated the loved up stories, but she missed that spark in her brothers eyes.

“Hey Chris?” AJ asked after dinner.

“Yep?” Chris answered looking at his younger sister, trying to comprehend what had happened and how much time really had passed.

“How’s Ariana?”

Chris shrugged. “I’m sure she wasn’t my only friend. But I think she’s good. I haven’t really spoken to her.”

AJ nodded. “How come?”

“I don’t know AJ. I guess it’s been a day since we’ve seen each other and there isn’t anything to talk about.”

It was weird to AJ, because they use to talk everyday about random things. They’d spend hours on the phone with each other, and now, it was radio silence.

“Did something happen?” AJ pushed.

“No AJ. We just don’t have anything to talk about!” Chris snapped, but instantly felt bad. “Sorry, I just. We haven’t spoken because there isn’t much to say.” He got up and moved to his room, leaving AJ alone with her thoughts.

Morning came and it felt different then in the hospital for Chris. Like a presence was missing, but he just took it for a doctor. He felt a little empty inside, like a part of him was missing, but he shrugged it off.

After getting ready for the day, he walked downstairs into the kitchen, and met his family.

“Mornin’ Chris.” Kyle said, after scoffing down some pancakes.

“Some things never change.” Chris’ mother laughed. “So, did you sleep well?” Chris nodded.

“Very! I’m actually meeting up with a couple of friends, I’ll be back later alright?” He ruffled his younger sibling’s hair, and kissed his mothers cheek. “See you guys soon!”

He left the house, and met in a cafe with his friends.

“Been a while Powell.” A tall red head said grinning.

“It has been a while hasn’t it Charlie?” Chris shook his hand firmly.

“Powell!” A blonde haired man clapped his shoulder.

“Hey Jack!” Chris felt himself grow more comfortable again.

“So, how is the girl?” Chris raised an eyebrow.

Confusion was all he felt. He couldn’t comprehend much about the past, but no one told him about a girl.

“Who?” He asked.

“That girl.. She was really pretty. Short, but amazing and stunning.” Chris shrugged.

“She’s gone.” He said. How he wished he knew who they were talking about.

“Alright. But hey, don’t you think she’s a cutie?” The boys pointed to a woman behind the counter. Her hair was back in a bun and her skin was glowing under the lights in the cafe.

“She’s cute. I’ll say that.” Chris said, a small smirk appearing on his lips.

The girl lifted her head and their eyes met.

“Christopher Powell? Is that you?” She exclaimed.

Chris’ jaw dropped. She looked marvellous. And he just needed her in his life again. It had been far too long without contact from her. Far too long without the feel of her hand in his. Far too long since they last…

If you want to be part of the tag list, let me know x

#chris x mc #chris x ariana #part 2 #the freshmen #the sophomore #the junior #chris powell #playchoices #playchoices fanfiction #chantelle-x0x fanfiction #angst #my version of the car crash #enjoy x

53 notes · View notes

kayetaz · 6 years

Text

I Can’t Do the One-Two Step | Newt x Reader

Request: Heyy! Would you write an imagine with Newt where everyone knows they're in love with each other but reader and Newt are damn oblivious about it so the glade tries to get them together and then they just hang mistletoes everywhere until they kiss and each other? I hope my english is okay, it's not my first language!😅 btw i love your writings!😍 - Anonymous

Warnings: None Word count: 2,668

A/N: Thank you for the request! Your English is fine, honey. Don’t ever feel embarrassed by that because knowing more than one language is so badass. As TBS would say, YOU GO GIRL! And, by the way, I loved writing this so much, it was so freaking cute and feel free to request imagines anytime because you have awesome ideas. I hope you enjoy it!

While none of us can remember a specific Christmas memory, we all remember the happy and family-centered holiday in general, and we decided that this year we would celebrate it in the Glade. The month before we were going to have our Christmas we spent decorating with what little materials we could work with, and gathering or making presents for other members of our little family. We were waiting until the thirty-sixth Greenie was sent up, marking three years that the first round of Gladers have been here.

I hear footsteps outside of my room in the Homestead and immediately throw the gifts and paper I’m using for wrapping under my bed as my door swings open.

“Saw that,” Teresa accuses with a giggle before bounding over and jumping to sit on my bed next to me.

“It doesn’t matter because I obviously wouldn’t get you a present,” I joke and stick my tongue out at her.

“Now, we both know that’s a lie. You love me the most of anyone here. Well, the second most,” she wiggles her eyebrows at me.

I push her playfully. “Quiet, you, or you definitely won’t be getting anything next week.”

“So what did you get Newt?” she asks, her voice a whisper.

I bite my lip and play with my fingers for a bit, feeling embarrassed. “Well, I kind of have been working with Gally on something...”

I meet her eyes and she’s staring at me expectantly.

I move to the floor and search under my bed before I grab the only present wrapped neatly in gold paper.

“Newt’s looks like that, while you throw mine, your best friend’s, in a brown sack?”

Now I push her for real. “Teresa! You’re the worst. You couldn’t have waited another week?”

“I don’t like surprises,” she answers simply.

“Well, surprise! It’s going in the trash now,” I sigh while she laughs and then carefully unwrap the gold paper and give Teresa the contents.

“Wow, (Y/N), this turned out amazing!”

Gally let me borrow some wood and then supervised while I carved it into a dog that Newt had described to me on a few occasions that he thought he may have owned before the Glade. I also tied a small red ribbon around its neck.

“You didn’t have to go through all this trouble though, you know. I think there’s something Newt wants a little more.”

I arch a brow at her so she happily continues.

“You know, a –“ and then she pretends to make out with her hand.

“You’re delusional, and gross,” I deadpan, grabbing the figurine back and wrapping it up again just as carefully as the first time before returning it to its spot under my bed. “Also, we have to get to work now.”

I hear her sigh behind me while she sprints to keep up with my retreating self. “You and Newt are the delusional ones.”

“Can we just drop the whole ‘Newt is in love with you too’ act? I’m really not in the mood today,” I say sadly once she catches up and walks next to me.

Teresa groans. “One day, both of you will stop being so shucking ignorant and finally see the truth.”

I ignore her as I see the second-in-command walking towards us but before he catches up, Teresa says goodbye and walks away in a different direction. He smiles at me and I smile back, letting my hair fall in front of my face to hide a blush that I know will probably come.

“Hey, (Y/N),” he says, turning around so we’re both walking towards the kitchen together, which is basically in the direction he came from. He enjoys walking me to work most days, because he’s a nice guy and not because he likes me. I have to keep reminding myself that.

“Hi, Newt.”

We get close enough to the kitchen that I begin to see the paper machete balls decorating it that look like tree ornaments. I squeal in joy and run the last few feet to see them up close. Newt giggles behind me.

“Do you like them? It took a few weeks but I think they came out decent.”

“You did this?” I ask him, with what I can imagine is a huge grin on my face from how it somewhat hurts my cheeks.

He beams and looks down at the floor, rubbing his neck. “Well, you were saying it sucked because you couldn’t see all the festivities from inside the kitchen so I just...”

“I love it, Newt,” I exclaim, bounding forward and pulling him into a hug. “Thank you.”

As we pull away, I lose control of my own movements and find myself kissing him on the cheek. I then mentally slap myself and pull back all the way, my face now a bright crimson and my mouth hanging open at my own stupid actions. Newt’s cheeks redden as well but he continues to smile brightly at me.

“Get a room!” Frypan yells amusedly behind me and I awkwardly wave goodbye to Newt before I turn and follow Fry to start getting lunch ready.

Newt’s POV

(Y/N) waves goodbye and then retreats into the kitchen. I rub my cheek where she had kissed me and continue to feel the warmth on my face from my own blush. I know it doesn’t mean anything to her to make those friendly little gestures, but they always mean the world to me.

“Hey, lover boy,” I hear behind me and turn to see Minho standing there with a knowing smirk.

“How about a little louder, Min, I don’t think she heard you that time,” I respond, rolling my eyes and start walking towards the gardens.

He sighs loudly and follows next to me. “What does it matter? She obviously feels the same for you as you do for her.”

“No, she doesn’t.”

He grabs my sleeve and we come to a stop, staring at each other. “Dude, I literally just watched her kiss you.”

“On the cheek! And it was because I did something nice, and she was just being thankful and friendly,” I answer, annoyed because I really don’t feel like having this conversation with him again.

He laughs in my face. “There’s no such thing as a friendly kiss! I don’t care if someone saves me from getting eaten by a Griever, you’ll never find my lips on any shank unless I have feelings for them.”

“Minho, you’re my best friend, and I love you, but if you don’t shut up I swear I will punch you in the bloody throat so hard that you’ll have no choice but to be quiet,” I tell him and then start walking away again to actually do my job, unlike him.

“Love has made you violent,” he laughs behind me and I quicken my pace to get away from him.

(Y/N)’s POV

Even though our Christmas is today, we all still have to work until sunset. It gives us about two hours less of work than a normal day, but we’re all so antsy to start giving gifts and, for most of the Gladers, getting drunk.

Frypan and I have one of the busiest days of everyone because we have to do all the cooking for the big Christmas dinner, and we have pretty much everything on the menu. When Fry finally says I can have a ten minute break, I basically fall to the ground outside the kitchen from exhaustion. I sit and watch the gardens across from me, but Newt isn’t there because he’s probably showing the new Greenie around. It’s another boy, like we needed another one of those...

Teresa looks up from her weeding and sees me, and then proceeds to say something quickly to Zart before bounding over with a big smile on her face.

“Merry Christmas, (Y/N)!” she announces happily.

I nod back at her with a smile on my face, but I’m still too hot and tired to speak. I continue fanning myself as I am almost completely covered in sweat. As soon as I’m done here, I’m going to need to hit the showers before the party.

Teresa reaches into her pocket and grabs something wrapped in a handkerchief, which she hands to me.

I look confusedly at her and then open it. It’s a rectangular piece of metal which has our names carved into one side and ‘BFF’S 4EVER’ carved into the other.

“I love it, Teresa,” I say as I feel happy tears prick my eyes. “But why are you giving me this now? It’s only a few more hours until the party.”

“Well, this is your first present. Your second one comes later,” she says with a knowing smirk.

I don’t notice her mischievous glint because I’m subconsciously angry at myself for getting her only one present when she got me two, but I don’t have much time to think about it as Frypan starts calling my name.

I stand up and hug her. “Thanks again. I love it and I love you. I’ll see you later!”

“Merry Christmas, Gladers!” Alby yells as the leaders and Keepers throw their lit torches into the larger-than-usual stack of wood.

Woops and cheers fill the air and we all raise our cups up. The sun hasn’t set completely, so it’s not dark yet but the fire signifies a celebratory mood. Gally’s drink flows freely, as he’s made the biggest batch he ever has before. I try not to drink too much just yet because I want to give out my gifts before I get completely wasted.

I receive presents left and right, and give out sloppy hugs mixed with tears because I can’t seem to say thank you without crying – especially with a few drinks in me. I give out my presents to everyone, saving Teresa and Newt for last since they’re my best friends and I spent the most time on them.

I give Teresa a brown bag holding her small cow-skin purse and we giggle because we both know this is not her first time seeing it, but she wipes her eyes and thanks me with a big hug anyway.

My eyes scan the crowd for Newt but find him talking to Minho so Teresa and I fill our cups again and talk about all the presents we gave and received. I find Teresa looking over at the pair on a couple occasions even though she tries to laugh it off every time I catch her.

Finally, she looks up again with a big smile and then looks back at me. “Okay, time for present number two. It’s in the map room.”

It was almost completely dark at this point and I had quite a bit of alcohol in me, so I gape at her. “You’re kidding.”

“Nope,” she grins and then turns me around and pushes me forward.

“I’m going to trip and break something,” I turn to yell at her but she just keeps that playful smirk on her face and motions for me to continue.

I sigh and head into the forest a few feet before I hear footsteps behind me. At first, I’m happy that she’s come to keep me company so I don’t fall but then I turn and see that it’s Newt. We both stop and stare at each other for a second.

“Sorry, I wasn’t following you. Uh, Minho said he had a present for me in the map room.”

I squint at him. “Oh, really? That’s funny. Teresa said she had a present for me in the map room too.”

He holds out his hand and I take it. “Shall we, then?”

Newt stops me from falling on my face on several occasions but the alcohol helps to make me less embarrassed, and Newt and I are both amused at my clumsiness. We are almost bent over and in pain from laughing when we finally make it to the map room.

“Better not be spiders,” Newt snickers and then we enter.

The previous hilarity fades quickly as we see what our present from Minho and Teresa is. The map room’s ceiling is completely covered in mistletoe.

I feel my heart stop and Newt immediately pulls his hand out of mine. The lack of contact feels like a kick in the face. He definitely doesn’t feel the same, and now, Teresa has gone and ruined our friendship.

“I’m going to kill Minho,” Newt growls.

“No need. This is obviously Teresa’s doing,” I tell him, my voice barely a whisper.

“Trust me, this was Minho. I keep telling him you don’t feel the same but he just won’t hear it.”

I gasp and stare at him. “What?”

Newt looks at me confused for a second and then recognition graces his features as he realizes what he just said. I can see his body go into panic mode: his eyes dart to the floor, his lip gets caught between his teeth and it looks like he might actually bite it off, his hands start fiddling together and his skin has gone completely pale.

Maybe it’s the alcohol that helps, but I move in front of him and grab his face and his eyes finally meet mine again. I smile at him and he slowly begins to smile back, a blush appearing on both of our faces.

“So...” I begin, “there’s all this mistletoe above us...”

His smile grows wider before he leans in and captures my lips in a loving kiss. My hands move from his face to play with his blonde locks as his arms wrap around my waist and he pulls me completely up against his body. I feel his mouth open slightly and I reciprocate, letting his tongue enter my mouth and dance around with my own. After a few minutes, we pull away and he places two more chaste kisses on my lips before we just stand there smiling goofily at each other.

“Oh! I have something for you,” Newt says, stepping back and pulling a neatly wrapped box from his pocket. “Merry Christmas, (Y/N).”

I grin and take it from him, opening it up carefully and revealing a beautiful bracelet woven from dried plants and flowers. Happy tears prick my eyes again but this time I can’t stop them from falling down my face.

“I love it, Newt, thank you!” I say, reaching into my own pocket. “And, Merry Christmas to you too!”

His fingers come up to wipe my tears before he delicately takes his own gift, unwrapping it and gasping once the wooden figure is exposed. He picks it up and studies all the different angles.

“That’s him! That’s exactly what he looks like in my head! That’s amazing! How long did it take? How did you do this so well? When did you even-“ I shut him up by placing my lips on his and we giggle once I pull back.

“Thank you,” he says with love in his eyes and I kiss him again before taking his hand.

“We should get back to the party,” I say and he nods, still looking down to glance at his gift with a big smile.

We’re only a few feet out of the map room when we see all of the Gladers standing around with torches, staring at us expectantly. They look at our intertwined hands, and then at each other. Then I roll my eyes and give them all the answer they’re obviously waiting for: I grab Newt’s face and kiss him quickly on the lips.

The whole crowd goes wild and Newt and I just chuckle at them together, our faces red.

“You’re all actually the worst!” I yell at them playfully and then I see Teresa push her way to the front with a gleam in her eye.

“Aw, come on, (Y/N), where’s your Christmas spirit?” I respond by giving her my middle finger as Newt pulls me into another kiss. “There it is!”

The end.

Requests open.

293 notes · View notes

2ndaryreactsandscenarios · 6 years

Text

UP10TION Reaction to: Falling In Love At First Sight

Hello hello, my fellow people! Today is a good day. I have received my first ever request. *Sniffles holding back tears* I’m sorry, I’m just feeling very emotional right now. Now this request was made to be falling in love at first sight, and shall be carried out as it is. No twists. I give you my word~ (Fingers crossed behind back) I’m kidding. With CC&I, this is a mess pot waiting to happen. Now why do this? Because I want to that’s why! Besides, why not really? Let’s get straight into this mess can you dig it? Alright? Okay.

Hello~I don't know if the requests are open...but could you do Up10tion reaction to falling in love at first sight?Thank you!^^ Love your page btw❤

WARNING: A LARGE AMOUNT OF COINCIDENCE, CONVENIENCE AND IRONY SHALL ENSUE! I REPEAT A LARGE AMOUNT OF COINCIDENCE, CONVENIENCE AND IRONY SHALL ENSUE!!! You have been warned.

Jinhoo (The Genius and Caring Leader)

Peace Out Route~

Jinhoo would literally have his breath taken away when he saw you. You would be out and about, just trying to carry on best you could with your day, when the moment just seemed so at peace. The wind would blow when Jinhoo happened to be walking the same path as you. He saw you, and he stopped in his tracks. Everything around him seemed to fade, all except for you. In that moment, it was as if it was meant just for the two of you. While time was going slow for him, you carried on and walked past him. He would bite his lip when he came to his senses. He would turn to see you walking away. He reached out and grabbed your hand. You would turn to see him, biting his lip, completely nervous and not certain of what to say. Every time he tried to speak, he felt his own heart hammering in his chest. He was at a loss of what to say to you. You asked if he was okay, and it was then he remembered that he should probably breath. And after doing so, he would finally manage to ask you; “Can you tell me your name?” And you would tell him. Later that evening, he would still be beside himself and happy that he got your name. He kept replaying it over and over again in his head. It was only on the 3,560th time did he realize that he hadn’t gotten your number, and had no way to contact you. He would be grumpy into the next day, until he so happened to see you again.

Mutual Out Route~

You were walking, tending to whatever business (or lack of) you had to. The wind blew as you walked down a rather empty path, when you met the eyes of Jinhoo, who was going the other direction. And it took your breath away. The whole world melted away, all except for you two. You wanted to stare at him forever, and you wanted to know why it felt like at any moment that your stomach would explode with butterflies. You managed to break away, feeling the blush creep up your face. You couldn’t believe that you had been so enamored by one mere glance from someone you’d never met. Falling in love at first sight seemed too much, but it was the only thing that fit. As the world seemed to rush back to your side, you continued on, knowing that it was too much to hope that he noticed you too. You passed him by, and you felt your own heart hold you back. I’m sorry did I say heart? I meant a literal hand. You turned to see Jinhoo holding your hand, looking right at you. He said nothing, and only stared at you. You didn’t know what to do when he was staring at you, and felt like you would turn brighter with every second. You finally mustered the courage to ask him if he was okay, to which he nodded, breathed out and instead asked for your name. And you told him. Later that night, you couldn’t believe how silly you had been that afternoon. Stopping and staring at someone you had never met. Only, deep in your heart, it didn’t feel so silly. You wished you could see him again, even now. But you knew it was too much to hope for. That is... Until you happened to cross paths again the next day.

Kuhn (The Confident, Charismatic Mood Maker)

Peace Out Route~

Now, Kuhn would literal have his jaw drop when he saw you. Through his eyes, you made the rest of the world seem dull. You carried yourself in such a way that captured his attention, and you did it in such a way that Kuhn lost interest in all else. And in that moment of butterflies and slack jaw, he would find it in himself to walk straight up to you. (Closing his mouth of course). You would look at him, and ask what he wanted. He would stick out his hand and say, “I’m Kuhn. Any chance I can get your name though?” And this caused you to laugh (whether it be out of how odd the situation itself is, or because of what he said, or you remembered something on TV, WHATEVER IT IS you laugh). When he heard you laugh, he felt his heart leap out of his chest. (His heart would look at him and tell him that this one was a keeper). After you gave him his name, and he walked away, he would practically be skipping though the streets with how happy you made him. It would be about 100 feet from the fateful encounter when he realized he hadn’t got your number, and thus had no way of contacting you. He would turn back and run off to find you! And when he did, all out of breath, he would try and say, “H-Hey. It’s me again. Quick *breathes for air* question. Can I... Have your number?” And after laughing for a good minute, you would give it to him for his award winning tenacity.

Mutual Out Route~

You had happened to be walking in a place, when someone was going out as you were going in. (There is a glass door, and next to it is a long glass window, you follow?) You would catch a glimpse of Kuhn as you entered the building. You would be struck down almost immediately as he captured your attention (I’m punny, yay!!!!). You would forget whatever you were doing, and go out of the building. You would look around trying to remember which way he was going and run after him. You didn’t know what you ere doing, it was foreign to you. But so was this feeling that he gave you. You felt too many things just from the sight of someone you had never met, and whatever it was, you needed to confirm whether or not it was real or not. Once you reached the corner of the building, you would turn sharply and bump into someone. Before you could hit the ground, you would be caught by one arm. One arm of the one and only Kuhn. You would look into each others eyes, and he would smile at you. His smile was the one thing you never knew you needed. That smile alone validated your feelings from earlier, and only made them grow in size. He would tilt his head and ask you, “Where are we running off to in such a hurry beautiful?” He would lift you back to your feet, holding on to one hand. “Before you run off, is there any chance I can get your name? And maybe... Your number?”

Kogyeol (The Humble, But Clumsy Charmer)

Peace Out Route~

Kogyeol would be very shy to approach you. He wouldn’t know what to say or how to get the conversation going. But when he saw you, he knew right away that he was caught hook line and sinker. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you. With each step you grew closer to him, he felt he would burst into bloody red blush. He did his best to keep walking and focus on whatever it was he was doing at the time, but he couldn’t keep his eyes off you. So much to the fact that he wasn’t looking where he was going, and ran straight into a pole. He held in the pain as he tried to hold his tears back, when he felt someone tap his shoulder. It was none other than you. You asked him if he was okay. He shook his head frantically, and then nodded, which confused you. He was just so excited. You, the one who had stolen his heart, had actually talked to him. Coincidence? I think, NOT! (References~Incredibles~) “No, I’m okay. Just caught off guard.” (By you!) You would tell him to be more careful as you gave him something cold for his nose (because you just so happened to have something cold. Yeah). You would turn and begin to walk away, when Kogyeol gathered enough will to call out to you and yell, “Can I ask for your number?!” You would turn around in surprise, and Kogyeol would be blushing from ear to ear. He didn’t know he had it in him to be so forward. And lucky for him, that forwardness rewarded him with a number that day he fell in love.

Mutual Out Route~

You were sitting in a library doing worked, books stacked on the edge of the table (because for some odd reason you decided to do this). You were focused, or at least trying to on whatever it is you needed information on when your elbow hit the books, causing them to fall onto the floor. Others looked at you in surprise, annoyance, and curiosity; but not one of them got up to help you. You quickly tried to pick up the things that fell to the ground, embarrassed that it had happened, when you saw someone kneel down beside you and help you. You looked up and you were *ding ding ding* knocked out! K.O! Kogyeol had you completely enamored, as you took in every detail about him. He turned to you and handed you the books. “Here you go.” You were still staring at him, and were in what seemed to be an unbreakable trance. He would tilt his head and look at you. “Are you okay? Do you feel... alright?” You would snap out of it, and tell him you were okay. He would laugh. “That’s a relief. I was worried for a second there.” He would get up to walk away, and you would be so startled. You had only barely just met him. He couldn’t be leaving just yet. You would get up quickly to say something, and he would turn to see what was up. As you tried to take a step forward and say something, you felt all of the papers you had just gathered fall out of your grasp. You stood a blushing mess, as you picked the mess. Once again, Kogyeol picked the papers up for you, only he was snickering now. You apologized to him, and he said it was fine. “It’s not every day I have such an interesting encounter. You had something you wanted to say? Go ahead. You have officially caught my full attention.”

Wei (The Tall and High Angelic Rapper)

Peace Out Route~

Wei would be on a walk to who knows where, when he would end up on a rather isolated or empty path. Walking down it he felt completely isolated and the path seemed dark. But then you came down it. When he laid eyes on you as you walked down the path, he was amazed by how you could light up a path like that, how one other person could do something like that. You had your headphones in and your head to the sky. Wei kept his eyes on you, fascinated by your ability to light up his view without trying. But since neither of you are capable of watching the path you walk, it was only natural that you collided. You would meet Wei’s gaze as he loomed over you. He hurriedly held out a hand to you. “I’m so sorry, are you alright?” You took it, and said it was alright. You looked at him again and said you didn’t know how you could have missed him. “Oh, because of my height? I guess I’m pretty tall aren’t I?” You looked at him in surprise and looked away. Wei saw the red on your ears, as you said quietly that supposed he was tall after all. You wouldn’t admit that you weren’t talking about his height, and that it was him overall that you had missed.

Mutual Out Route~

You were trying to reach for a book on a high shelf at a local library, and just couldn’t reach it. You tried to reach, and obviously couldn’t, so you were just about ready to see if the coast was clear enough to climb the shelf when someone put a hand on your shoulder. You looked up to see Wei reaching up and grabbing the book for you. “Is it this one?” You nodded, and he looked at you holding the book in his hand. When his eyes looked into your own, it was as if you could see a whole other world in them. You believed his world to be so much more interesting than your own, or any of the worlds in these books. You wanted to look at it forever, but he placed the book on your head, and began to walk away. You wanted to call out to him and thank him for getting it for you, but he seemed to be gone, and left as quickly as he came. You sighed as you returned to your little corner of the library, and read your book. But it wasn’t nearly as interesting as Wei was. You didn’t even know his name then, but you wished you had had the courage to ask for it. You sighed, as you put your head in the book. You felt a chair move beside you, and gave a melancholy glance to whoever pulled the chair open. “Is it okay that I sit here?” You sat up immediately and nodded. It was Wei, the guy from earlier. You tried to focus on being natural and reading the book, but none of the words were getting through to you. When you glanced at him, he was reading something of his own. You couldn’t tear your gaze away from him. “Is it interesting?” He would look at you and smile, and without hesitation you said it was the most interesting thing in the world. Realizing the words that had just left your mouth you covered it, as Wei’s surprised expression matched your own. You tried to assure him that you meant the book, as he covered his face up to his nose with his book. With a blush touched upon each ear, he mutter, “You’re really forward aren’t you?” Your blush rose in shade as you thanked him for getting it. Regaining his composure, he said, “Well, if you want to repay me... It’d be nice to have a name for you beautiful... And a number to call you?” You would give it to him despite your nervousness, and you two went off into a whole little world of your very own.

Bitto (The Deep and Low, Dance King Rapper)

Would meet you at a bus stop, and you have headphones in.

Peace Out Route~

Bitto would arrive at an empty bus stop. He would look at his phone, and wonder how it was possible the bus still hadn’t arrived yet. That’s when he heard some shuffling on the other side of the wall. (You know bus stops how they have this three sided wall facing out to the streets? And how on the inside of those walls there is a bench usually? Bitto was standing on the others side of a wall and you are where the benches are. Oops... Surprise it’s you, but wasn’t that obvious? ANYWAY) Bitto would glance to the inside, and see you jamming out there. You had headphones loud enough for any passerby to hear the music. You were jamming to... an oldie, a classic... Mr.Blue Sky! (WHY? Because it was a clear day and you can see a blue sky! That is WHY) You would be jamming along with the music, and your mumbles would become louder as you got more into the music. And Bitto would just watch you in a fascination. You were just funking it out, and your headphones were loud enough to blast the entire world out. You moved around more wildly, and eventually turned to meet his gaze. And he wouldn’t even hide the fact that he was watching you. He would clap his hands, applauding the performance. He would then shoo his hand forward and say, “Go on. Not everyday you get to see a performance like that.” So, Bitto’s love at first sight would be much more subtle. But, you would be on his mind for days, and it would hit him harder because he didn’t know what he was feeling. But he would be more so that enamored with you that he himself didn’t realize how he felt for you.

Mutual Out Route~

WARNING: Coincidence, Convenience, and Irony MURDERED THIS ONE. So, you would be at the bus stop with your headphones in, silently jamming to some jams. You were fine singing aloud till someone sat beside. This would be Bitto, who also had his headphones in. He didn’t look at you, and you didn’t look at him. You both were just sitting there bobbing your heads to your own music. And because you two were so stuck inside your own heads, you didn’t realize that you two were dancing to the music you heard. Then, a new jam entered the scene, and you know that build up to the beat drop yeah? Well you would both yell out the drop lyric at the same time (so if it was like Bang Bang Bang, you would yell out “Bang Bang Bang together, and be doing the choreography). Now yes, headphones are playing, but you can both hear each other shout that out and you look at each other. Just the sight of Bitto blew you away, and you looked away. You weren’t sure if people like him or moments like this were real. He would wave his hand in front of your face. He would yell loud (his headphones were in), “HEY! ARE YOU LISTENING TO THIS TOO?” When you gave him a weird look, he realized his headphones were still in. He took them out, and took them out of his phone, blasting the music out of it. “Were you listening to this too?” You disconnected your headphones too, and (CC&I) your musics would be playing in sync, same part, same line, down to the same second! (Now you say impossibility, I say convenience, coincidence, and irony! It is a scenario, and you never know. Ha, that rhymed) When he heard the music playing in sync, he would be very hyped up. He would literally jump with joy, unable to believe something like this had happened. “This is amazing! Come one!” Bitto wouldn’t be satisfied until you did the song dance with him. After the song ended, he would be hyped as could be that that just happened. You wanted to ask him his name, but the bus arrived, and he went on, not giving you the chance. You sat down on the bus sadly. Moments like that were rare (Rare? RARE? IMPOSSIBLE!!!) , and you had let a chance encounter like that pass you by. In the end, before the bus could take off, you decided to take a chance! To be courageous and go sit next to him. You got up suddenly out of your seat, and Bitto would ask you, “What’s wrong?” You jumped! He was sitting in the seat next to you. You sat down and asked him when he got there and why he was there. “Why? Because I want to sit next to you.” You sighed, tired from getting yourself worked up. “Changhyun... It’s my name. But some people call me Bitto.” He held his hand out to you, and you took it giving him your own name. You two spent the bus ride talking music. You knew you were smitten with him, and hated how relaxed him seemed looking back. However, if you had taken the time to look carefully then, you would have noticed the red in Bitto’s ears, from when he sat down next to you at the bus stop, throughout the entire bus ride, and from then on.

Wooshin (The King of Entertainment, Shy Fox Troublemaker)

Peace Out Route~

Wooshin would be at a local bookstore, browsing through the comic section, not really sure what was a good number of manga to buy. Or which manga to buy for that matter. He suddenly heard a small voice tell him that the one he was reading was really good. He turned and looked at you reading a manga standing next to him. He suddenly got flustered and shy, and would try to respond. But he found he couldn’t really look at you. “Oh? Is that so?” You would nod and come closer to him saying that this series was actually a sequel, but still a stand alone. However you would trigger something in him, when you said that one series is better than the other. “No way. This series is so much better. The story line is complimented so well by the artwork!” You two would end up in a debate about which series was better for whatever reason you two saw fit. It wouldn’t matter how enamored he was, he would defend his favorite series. After an eternity of said banter and argument, you would both come to the mutual agreement to respect the opinion on this particular matter and series for now. Wooshin by this point would be excited and would say, “But we can’t just leave this up in the air. You can’t honestly still think that it’s better. I’ll prove it to you that it is a good series. Let me have your number, so I can show you fair and square!” And you being as hyped as he was from the argument would agree. “Fine! I’ll show you!” Wooshin would then storm off after the exchange, and process that he had gotten your number. And more than being heated over the argument, he would feel the heat rise in his cheeks in embarrassment for letting himself get so excited. He would silently pat himself on the back for a job well done.

Mutual Out Route~

You had been visiting a bookstore for quite sometime now. Why? Because your heart had utterly been stolen by Wooshin. You had walked in to get a book you had been curious about and seen him in the comic section reading. Since then, it was natural that you wanted to find something in common with this mysterious man. So, you delved in the comic section, and wanted to learn more about any and everything about the comics that had gained his interest. You started with the ones he picked up and the ones you saw him buy. Then from there on you were stuck hook line and sinker in the world of comics. So one day by pure coincidence, you had been browsing the sections and by the power of the CC&I in that bookstore, you had stood beside Wooshin while browsing. You peered up at him and saw his debatable expression while he looked at the book, and you realized in surprise that you had read that series before. So you gathered the little bit of courage you could muster and told him that it was a good series. “Oh? Is that so?” You mustered your courage again, and would try to give him other recommendations, and when he was really quiet, you thought you had scared him away. Your voice grew quieter and you quietly said that one series was better than another, when Wooshin leaned in close to you and said, “No way. This one is way better.” Now, all you fear and anxiety flew away. You had gotten more heavily into comics because of him, and he was going to diss your current favorite series? Oh no no no. This lead to a debate that even tired out the sun, as it set on that day. “ Let me have your number, so I can show you fair and square!” You couldn’t believe it as you walked away from the argument. You had finally spoken to him, and you even got his number. You thanked the comic guardians of dignity, and instantly remembered your own! You were determined to prove to Wooshin that the series you liked was better... And maybe win his heart along the way.

Sunyoul (The Beautiful Gentle Voice That Goes HIGH)

Peace Out Route~

Sunyoul would be at a convenience store called CC&I, and would be shopping for little things he needed. It was when he heard the door ring that he would glance to see who came in out of pure curiosity. It was the most fatal moment of his life, as you entered the convenience store and took his breath away right away. He would keep his eyes on you, and pretend to be interested in the items that he happened to pass by. However, because he wasn’t looking where he was going, he wouldn’t notice the WET FLOOR SIGN smack in the middle of the floor. Needless to say that the fall would be epic. He would fall and hold his head in pain, when you would run up to him and ask if he was okay. You would end up falling to and he would get up quickly and ask, “Are you okay?” You two would look at each other and end up laughing at the sight. You would insist through your laughter that you asked if he was alright first. “Me? What about you?” After you two laughed for some time, you finally composed yourselves. You introduced yourself, and you asked for his name, which would send his heart on somersault and back flip sprees. “You can call me Sunyoul.” After you two left the scene of the accident, you two would hit it off right away, and would be talking about purely anything that came up. Sunyoul was happy to be with you, and secretly, you were just as happy as he was.

Mutual Out Route~

You would be out and about in the rain, and would be running to take cover until the rain let up. You reached an almost empty bus stop, and was trying to catch your breath, when someone caught your eye. The only other person inhabiting the bus stop, Sunyoul. He would be looking at you, and you would be looking at him. You would look at the bus stop schedule, and try to keep your composure. But how can you really? Your soaking wet, and cold, and of course now struck down with an illness called love at first sight itis. You tried to avoid eye conduct, and were embarrassed out of your mind. Suddenly you heard footsteps coming closer to you. Against your better judgement, you decided to look and see what was now standing beside you. You looked to see Sunyoul shyly standing next to you. “Um? Aren’t you cold? If you are, here. You can wear this.” Sunyoul held out a jacket for you. “You can also use this is you want to.” He held out an umbrella too. Reluctantly you took it, then you thought a moment. You asked him if you took those, what would he do. “I’ll find a way back to where I need to go. I care more about you now anyway-- AH!!” As soon as the words left his mouth he was hunched on the ground. You peered down on him, and saw his ears a bright red. You laughed, as you hunched down with him. You told him as you opened the umbrella and held it over him that you weren’t gonna leave him behind, and that if you were going anywhere, you would take him with you. He peeked up at you and then at the umbrella and sighed. “See? This is the stuff you can’t do. It’s embarrassing for me you know! My heart can’t take this sort of thing.” And despite all embarrassment, you both made it out of the rain alive and together.

Gyujin (The Absolute Shyest and Purest)

Peace Out Route~

Gyujin would be at a loss of words. He would know from the minute he laid eyes on you that he wanted to keep looking forever. He would be far too shy to say anything or initiate a conversation with you. So, he decided that if he couldn’t talk to you, it would be you who would talk to him. He would end up following you around, heart practically beating in his throat. He would do this in the hopes of finding the perfect opportunity to bump into you, and to have you clear the air by speaking to him in what he imagined to be a gentle voice. And he was so delighted by his genius and by this plan that it didn’t at all occur to him that it was uncalled for or possibly creepy. This continued for some time, until you finally called him out for following you, and demanded an answer. You waited, arms crossed, for an answer to leave his mouth, and were growing more frustrated by the minute. Eventually Gyujin, growing frustrated from you being frustrated shouted, “I wanted to find a way to talk to you and didn’t want to leave seeing someone so cute! I wanted to talk to you because I wanted to get to know you! Okay?” Gyujin and yourself would be taken back by this answer, and he would cover his mouth embarrassed. “No... W-wait, you shouldn’t have heard that... This was supposed to sound cooler...” You would be humored by it though.You told him if he wanted to talk to you, then he should have called out to you. “How can I call out to someone so pretty?” You would feel your face turn red to this reply, and needless to say, you both took the plunge that day on the ship called loved.

Mutual Out Route~

You would be out and about, when you encountered Gyujin in a shop you frequented. You would stop cold, and hide in one of the nearby aisles. You would peek at him again, almost as if you were checking to see if he was real. He would still be standing there. You wouldn’t know what they were saying and took time to find a place to hide or sit until he left. You didn’t know what to do with this new feeling, and were scared of it at the moment. You only knew he was the source of it, and that it wasn’t safe until he was gone. You finally saw him move, and continued to move around the store to avoid him. This continued for some time. Eventually you lost sight of him, and thought he had finally left the store. You turned around to see him staring down at you, and immediately looked at the ground. You didn’t know what to do, and heard a small voice say, “Are you okay?” You looked up and saw him looking at you with concern, and felt tears bubble out of your eyes. He just had so many butterflies flying in your stomach that you really didn’t know if it was okay to feel this way. He would instantly panic at the sight of tears, and would actually scream a little. “Ah, no! Please don’t cry, I didn’t mean to make you cry, I just wanted to talk to you, that’s all!” He would make it his priority to cheer you up, and wouldn’t be satisfied until said condition was met. “Actually... I had seen you here a while back. I just didn’t have the courage to come and talk to you. But, I stopped by hoping I’d see you again. And then you started to cry, and well... It wasn’t at all what I planned...” You would apologize for crying and the rest was history...

Hwanhee (The Heart Melter, Fake Maknae#2 and Whiner)

Peace Out Route~

Hwanhee is the only one with the second hand confidence of Kuhn to be bold enough to know what he liked right away and to go after you. There would hardly be any hesitation. He would see you sitting on a bench, doing something like playing on your phone or reading a book, and would make a B line for you. He would sit beside you on the bench, and just look at you. You would ask him if he needed something to which he would reply: “Hi. My name is Hwanhee, but the one thing that would make me happiest right now is knowing your name. Could you do that for me?” You would smile, and ask him why he wanted to know it. “Because, don’t you want to make me happy, so I can have the best day ever?” You would say that you didn’t even know him. “Yet! And if you don’t know me, let’s take this chance to get to know me. All I ask in return is that you let me get to know you.” You would ask again why. “Isn’t this how people get to know each other? If you see someone and want to know them, isn’t this how you start introductions?” After minutes of this sort of banter, you would give in and give him your name. He would stand up satisfied and make like he intended to leave, but clap his hands and return. You would look at him expectantly and ask him what he needed now that you made him happy. “I’m sorry, I have a confession to make. I need one more thing to make me happy forever.” You would ask him what that was. “Your heart. You already have mine, so can I have it please?”

Mutual Out Route~

You would be walking in a park when you say Hwanhee sitting on a bench. He was sitting right before your eyes, but you could tell from one glance that his head was in the clouds. You wanted to talk to him that day, get to know what he saw up in that sky filled with clouds. So, everyday for the next several days, you would sit somewhere nearby, and try to see what he saw. And everyday, you got closer and closer to him. You always stayed until he left, and when he did you would sit in the spot next to where he was, just to feel closer to him. You always told yourself that tomorrow would be different, and you would get the courage to waltz up and sit next to him, starting a conversation with the man who stole your heart. He took your heart away and didn’t even know it. That just wasn’t fair, and you wanted his heart in return. But as the days turned to weeks, you felt like it was all in your head. That you were in love with the idea of him and that you hadn’t the foggiest clue or idea of how he really was. So, you were a few benches down from him, and rather than looking at him, this time you looked at the sky. Maybe if you could find what had snatched his eyes away from the world, you could understand him more, and maybe that could be a reason for why you liked him so much. You didn’t notice until someone blocked your view of the sky. You were shocked to see Hwanhee in front of you. “You’ve been a while haven’t you?” He asked. You nodded. He smiled as he sat down beside you. “What do you see in that world of yours? You always have your head in the clouds when you come here. I don’t mean to be rude... I just noticed that you come here often.” You wanted to respond, but you felt yourself laugh. Only laugh. So it wasn’t just you who had noticed him. Somewhere along the way, he had noticed you, and that made you feel in your heart the answer: Ah, you really love him, don’t you? You told him you could ask him the same thing. You wouldn’t find this out until much later, but Hwanhee had seen you on the streets a while back. He went to that park wondering if he would ever meet you again, and as fate (or CC&I) would have it, you were there too.

Xiao (The True Maknae and the Emotional Guy)

Peace Out Route~

In this scenario, Xiao would actually have the same freeze moment that some of the members did (Where everything goes slow in that moment). But, within that moment, he would probably have a lot of thoughts going on inside his head. What is this feeling? Who are you? Why is my heart racing? He would feel so many things at once. The butterflies, the raising heat in his head, and his eyes concentrating on only you. He knew that it would be simply to just talk to you, but what if he said the wrong things? What if he blurted out his feelings and you rejected them? All of the what ifs overwhelmed him. So within that moment, he cried. Cried from the feelings that were born and your overwhelming beauty. He didn’t know how to approach either. He felt panic as he felt time return to his side. Because as it ticked on and on, you were continuing forward selfishly; leaving him stuck forever. And he didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t control time, but he absolutely knew that he didn’t want this to be the last moment you two shared. But as the tears fell down his cheeks, and he felt ever so hopeless, he could only hang his head low, as he stood in the middle of a busy path trying to collect himself. Passerby’s all gave him curious looks or annoyed ones, but they carried on with their days. Everyone passed him by... except for you. He felt someone stop in front of him and glanced to be surprised when he saw you. You asked him if he was okay. He wanted to tell you that he was fine, but he just ended up spilling a river of tears. You panicked and hugged him, rubbing his back and saying it was okay. Except that was a fatal mistake. Because now that he had a hold on you, he was never going to let you go.

Mutual Out Route~

You would be out and about, carrying on down a busy path, when you bumped into someone. You would turn to apologize when (Cupid aiming his arrow straight at your hear, BA-DA-BING BA-DA-SHOOT! Oopsie daisy, he hit you straight in the hear) you met the gaze of Xiao. INITIATE the freeze moment. Perhaps you have had crushes before, or liked someone before, but you have never liked someone this much before. You had never met the person before, and he hadn’t even said a word to you. And yet, you could drown in his eyes forever in that one moment. Suddenly a tear streamed down your face. You didn’t know why, it just suddenly fell out. You tried to wipe it away when you heard a small laugh. Xiao grabbed your arm and smiled. You looked at him to see a tear stain on his own face. “We’re the same aren’t we? We both cried. I wonder why though...” You asked him why he was crying. He smirked at you, leaning in close enough to whisper to you. “Why are you?” After a moment, you would say that you asked him first. He would lean back, and you almost swore you caught hint of a blush. He put his hands in his pocket, and smiled at you. “I wonder...” You couldn’t help but wonder if he could hear the butterflies flapping their wings in your stomach when he spoke again. Only this time he seemed pretty bashful. “You’re so curious about me, but all I’m curious about is that name of yours~” You laughed at that, and he stomped his foot in frustration. “Oh, come on! You know how cringe-y it sounded! Imagine how much I cringed in having to say it!” You were still laughing at the line, and he was obviously embarrassed now, losing all composure he had. “Are you ever going to stop laughing and tell me your name? I’ll tell you mine. It’s Xiao. Come on, please?” After an seemingly eternity of your laughing, you finally consoled a pouty Xiao by telling him your name. But he wouldn’t be satisfied with just that. “Not enough anymore. You shambled my pride. Now I need a number to call and repair it.” You broke out laughing again. “STOP IT!!”

Wowzers! That’s a lot of words! I hope that the person who requested this is happy with what I wrote. I had a fun time writing it, and I sincerely hope that all you people are having a fantastic day/afternoon/evening/night, and shall see you all again soon!

#up10tion #up10tion reactions #up10tion reaction #up10tion scenario #up10tion scenarios #up10tion jinhoo #up10tion kuhn #up10tion kogyeol #up10tion wei #up10tion bitto #up10tion wooshin #up10tion sunyoul #up10tion gyujin #up10tion hwanhee #up10tion xiao #kpop reactions #kpop reaction #kpop scenario #kpop scenarios

60 notes · View notes

powlokisdiary · 6 years

Photo

The 'ugly bunch' - Does an animals appearance affect it's popularity? *DISCLAIMER * I'm having to remain very open minded and understanding of varying opinions in regards to this post as I genuinely can't think of an animal as being ugly! For starters many if my favourite animals are considered awful lookjng or are unheard of by most. For instance I love Xeno, but my brother thinks she's awful 🤣 And one of my favourite fish is the sarcastic fringehead.... yes it's a real thing btw! 😂 A lighthearted survey undertaken by ZSL of about 1,000, 78% of them had heard of the gruffalo but only 3% had heard of a creature known as the solenodon. Ultimately the survey showed that we had a rather capricious attitude towards certain species. This view has affected numerous things around the world - Vulture conservation for example, a species that is incredibly important for a healthy ecosystem and without them WE would suffer drastically, is often cast aside in favour of something we consider more appealing looking like a panda or tiger (all if which need preserving btw). Another recent study taken by US scientists at the John Hopkins university suggested that people may not be as put iff by ugly animals as you may think. The blobfish was voted as the worlds ugliest animal in a humerous campaign by the ugly animal preservation society, and it later spawned t shirts, artwork and a stand up comedy show. The research shows that people are more willing to help the ugly animals if they were simy marketed in a different way. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder after all and the US scientists research showed that by altering how we receive something does affect our views on it. So! I decided to do a little survey if my own for this post.... First of all I asked people the basic question: "Does an animals overall appearence affect it's popularity?" (and why they think this). The majority of people answered with yes it does, but the rwasons why were a tad more diverse than I expected. Quite a few said that the cuter fluffy animals would attract more popularity because they look more approachable, friendlier and predictable. One persons response was rather good as I think it explains why we are more erratic with certain species in particular - media. Using their example of a spider; "we generally can't understand, communicate/talk to them. They have multiple eyes and legs so on that note we can't relate further, making us uneasy with it's movements and by it's differences in general (we as humans naturally fear/dislike/feel uneasy by things that are different to us)... so we took note of this and used it in media production, films etc. Our media has further hyped the fear due to no fault of the spiders!" Now tge points they presented I personally agree with! My nan is terrified of snakes and snake like creatures such as moray eels etc and she blames that on a film she saw when she was younger about a cobra. Before this she had never had any negative experiences but the depiction in the film made her scared of them to a point where she struggled to look at photos even. But on a trip to the zoo last year she came face to face (on her own accord) with a gaboon viper. The first time she had been within that close a proximity to a big, venomous snake. After a while of looking at it whilst I spammed this thing with my camera she began to marvel at it's patterns and eventually she said she "wasn't sure why she's been so afraid, it isn't fast and erratic and it's not homing in on me. Instead it's very calm and beautiful to look at. It's nothing like the one in the film was so I don't feel like it's going to get me, sure I still wouldn't go and hold one but I feel a bit silly thinking they were like that". Now I'm sure everyone has their own individual reasons for preferring an animal over another, it's human nature to formulate our own opinions in things for our own reasons. But when the audience was offered a different style of question the answers were very different. One person I purposely posed my original question too (purposely because their ability to think outside the box and offer different perspectives on things) helped me formulate my next question for people. I will elaborate their answer: "I find it strange how people can make an assumption about an animal based on mere appearance alone. Most animals that we as a society shun or fear/have a mass of the population with a phobia of are usually quite soft natured and harmless. Yet most animals that are awed at are rather savage and confrontational in nature." They then asked me to describe 2 animals natures they suggested.... "For example you described the species that is generally feared as one that's naturally not confrontational, very placid when handled, shy, reluctant to attack and makes every effort to avoid people in the wild. But the creature i have witnessed many people in awe at, calling it cute and stating they want one are naturally quite aggressive, will readily bite you, is known as a problem because it raids nests etc. Describing the actual nature of an animal without telling people what it is and you tend to find the feared ones are pucked over the cute fluffly ones. It's very confusing how judgemental humans can be when we judge using appearance. Appearance shouldn't matter if it makes you overlook the genuine qualities of something". By presenting the animals in a different way to people the votes genuinely did flip with the shunned ones being picked more because they sounded nicer. At HQ we have something called the "undesirable 5" - 5 of our animals are considered as being too ugly or too scary compared to the others. Some may surprise you and some are plain obvious! #1) Xeno - She has generally caused the most 'urgh' ir fear stricken reactions out of all our critters. Yet she is the most harmless creature we have and the least likely to attack. They are very shy animals that would much prefer to run and hide than be near you. The mothers are also incredible parents that carry their young on their backs until they can fend for themselves. And Xeno's species are amongst the few arachnids to exhibit social behaviour. Mothers actively communicate with their young and the iffspring reciprocate with her and the siblings. Awwww! #2) Toni - Toni is relatively new here but has still gained a few uneasy responses. Bug hairy spiders generally freak people out it seems. But he's actually really placid, nice to work with and he's not unpredictable with mivements and never shown any aggression. My partner doesn't like spiders and he says he's quite nice! #3) Aida - Shocking! Lol. Aida falls into the 'snakes make people feel uneasy' part. I find the more 'python looking snakes' (sounds daft I know, but people generally think that boa's are pythons because their heads are a similar shape... from that perspective I can see where they are coming from). Aida is a dream to be around, she's so chill and I haven't got a bad thing to say about her, or pythons in general as I find that all I have encountered have been 'friendly to be around'. #4) Steve - you guessed it! But Sir.Steve response is split down the middle. He's a cute kind of scary. Hognoses are stated among snake keepers as being the friendliest snakes, but people are put off still because at the end of the day it is a snake. But they are still adorable because of their faces... the cute nose n all that 😂 #5) Chester - Rooks in general strike up much unappeal with the general public. They are seen as a nuisance by many and people will happily just shoot them without a second thought (Chester will tell you personally about that!). But a surprising response as to why people feel uneased by them is because of their faces! Some say it's the vulture-esque skin around the beaks, but a prominent remark us that they have a rather spooky, skeletal look about them. That twinned with corvid folklore/mythology and the asdociation corvids have to death in general seems to strike up superstitions making them unwelcome. I could go on about how amazing Chester is but I will save that for another time. So there's our unappealing 5! It has continued to intrigue me as to how people can judge based on appearance. It continues to drive us towards forming certain opinions and making decisions about animals and nature in general. Either way we are all entitled to our opinions! But keep in mind that looks can be deceiving, or things look a certain way due to their lifestyles/the ecological niches they fill and it shouldn't make them ugly. Everything is beautiful in it's own way (or at least it is to us at HQ!) www.facebook.com/TheLokiDiary

0 notes

zeebartels · 6 years

Text

First & most importantly –

All my love and thanks to my family, who know how much/little to check in on me and not ask too many/too few questions – DeeDee, Tins, Curtis, Manon, Chants, Casey

Zain – for being my hospital Saviour and just my favourite Pakistani ever! Chad – for trying your best to lie to the parents when KB ask the 2 questions you weren’t allowed to answer truthfully – that is what cousins are for. KB – you are my heroin and without knowing it guided me through this – WWKBD!

Elisha + Nico – for being the best big Sister + Brother a girl could need. There are no words to express how much I love you and appreciate you. Sis! looks like I will live to meet yuh man and you are the best secret keeper.

And, The NHS for existing [you can take all the National Insurance you want from me], King’s College Hospital & my multi-disciplinary team of docs for being absolute stars and sorting me out real quick.

So… it’s been a fucking mad end of this year.

I hate this time of year, it’s never felt happy or joyous and honestly I just see the loneliness in the world in this ‘festive’ season, and now compounded by the loss of my father on Boxing Day 2013 – this time of year I’m always thinking – where is the highest mountain or deepest hidey hole I can find until this is all over. But I think this year has taken the cake!

So I had this cough since end of July, no biggie – it’s a cough.

In October, I was inexplicably breathless speed walking to the boarding gate in Amsterdam with Court.

November 19th, I had the craziest fever – trying to sleep, laying naked in my living room with my windows and sliding doors open in the middle of winter and I still felt I was in Trinidad in midday hot sun.

Chaddy boy came over the next day and seeing I couldn’t say one word without having to catch my breath – emergency doctor’s appointment became mandatory. Now I am the worst patien if I can walk and not screaming in pain – I good, dancer habits die hard. So you know shit was real at this point.

Doc Wedgwood tells me to go directly to A&E 1st thing in the morning, She means – DO NOT pass go, DO NOT collect £200 [which would have been damn handy seeing I just quit my 2nd job for the year on Halloween – that’s another story though].

Of course, I was like “listen, give me some drugs so I stop this violent coughing business and could breathe cause I have a job interview tomorrow that not only do I really want to go to but shit! I need to be able to pay rent in 2018 and there is nothing that will make me move from the best flat in the world.”

We had a bit of a back and forth and this woman was not playing but no chest infection is going to affect my plan. Cue – an interview reschedule and I head to King’s College Hospital bright and early the next morning.

Give some blood and x-ray my chest. Then @ 8:50am the lovely good looking Isiah made everything a little more concerning. He asked me to stick around and started asking me a bunch of questions and after trying to be slick, I got him to eventually admit to me that, “My Chest X-ray is concerning, and I need to go to my GP 1st thing tomorrow to discuss the results”

Fuck me! So not a straightforward chest x-ray, not a simple case of a really bad chest infection. But you know I’m on a mission, cause I can’t tell my mother I quit another job this year without having sorted another, so I have interviews to get my ass too.

Fast Forward to that afternoon, and my Doc Wedgwood left 2 voicemails and emailed me about my early morning results appointment – slight panic set in, so I called in the reinforcements for this appointment – enter Nicholai from Stage Right.

So much changed in a couple sentences that Wednesday morning.

“Your chest x-ray isn’t good. We have to do more tests to fully diagnose, but it’s 1 of 3 things –

Lung cancer [WTF?!?!], Lymphoma [this woman crazy!?!?] or Sarcoidosis [I know she crazy cause only people on House or Greys’ Anatomy have that, and those are TV shows].

Your heart rate is 160 – it’s working too hard and your lymph nodes are inflamed around 400%”

If Nico didn’t say respond – I woulda tell you – that was the most vivid dream I ever had. My Big Brother [as he introduced himself to Doc Wedgwood] asked the sensible questions. I said – how the hell do I tell my mother & sister?!!?

The Bartels Soldier surfaced [I am the child of KB – the Original Gangster] and I needed to make a plan. I started my “I’m dying” folder in my Notes.

What needs doing…

What are the next steps to diagnosis?

Who needs to or should know?

Do I change my pension beneficiaries from my Godchildren to my mother and sister [the original plan of them being gone by the time I die may not be the same]?

If it’s a cancer – do I do the fucked up chemo thing or just make sure I enjoy the rest of my time?

Sweet! I lost 10lbs in 2 weeks and I didn’t even make an effort – this could definitely be a good thing!!

Who needs access to my business if shit goes downhill from here.

Answers…

Kings’ College Chest Clinic will call me with my next appointments and instructions

Nico [he was there], Elisha [she’s my person], Chaddy [he knows something is up]. KB + the rest will know when I know what is what

Diagnosis 1st then change beneficiaries if need be

Stage 1 – we will try ah ting & KB will have to come and mind her chile in London. Late Stage 2 and beyond – I’mma just ride this out and see what happens

I have 50lbs I need to lose and hate exercising so this is a real good thing & I’m going to ride this train as much as I can [so far -20lbs + counting in the last month]

Elisha – all of it. Nico – my hospital details.

So here is what followed:

My symptoms got worse –

I can’t walk 1 flight of stairs without being winded, I have to plan all my journeys around tube stations that have escalators and leave enough time to catch my breath before I have to speak to someone. And keep those to a bare minimum

Talking too much is difficult – not a problem for me, I’m not the biggest fan of people

Eating is tiring and takes my breath away – so most things become blended, good thing I had a bunch of already made frozen soup

I have violent coughing episodes that make anyone in my vicinity think I’m dying from the plague – They just gonna have to deal with that

My ribs are sore from all the coughing, so inhaling is painful

No matter how much water I drink (we are talking 3-4 litres a day) I still wake up at least 4 times every night coughing because my throat is so dry

I started sleeping on top of towels so my bed doesn’t get soaked from my night sweats

I decided on a hospital uniform – my fav GAP grey sweatpants & large quilted super cosy GAP jumper & NikexLiberty Air Max 90’s

Another 3 blood tests – 1 of which I had to tell a very fass phlebotomist about herself and that I do not need a husband nor define myself by the presence of a man & I still don’t know my blood type

A CT Scan – Yes you really do feel like you’ve pee’d yourself in your swimsuit and that cosy warmth stays with you for a couple seconds

A result appointments that only said more tests to come – Doc Turner didn’t seem too impressed to hear about my “I’m Dying” folder and whatever other snarky comments I made

A bronchoscopy – My body was not happy about the invasion and started bucking like I was possessed and thus a punctured lung (more Grey’s Anatomyy drama), I woke up, or more specifically, regained memory whilst in mid sentence to the nurse.

A week later – I found a bunch of druggie selfies and pics of bloody liquids [I assume came from me], and videos of my canula removal – no memory performing these actions and I doubt the nurse used my phone.

A PET Scan – preceded by a semi breakdown in the waiting room, it kicked off because they go my appointment times wrong, I was real tired and it was my 2nd day of fasting for a procedure. So a very unhappy Zara came to visit shouting for my doctor and threatening to start breaking things led to a coughing episode and was completed by my pee-ing myself while I’m trying to cuss them about their time fuck up. Eventually – they made me radioactive and I went home to my bed.

Ended that day with my cancelling an interview, receiving confirmation of 2 different job offers coming to my inbox within the next couple day and a late evening voicemail from Doc Turner “It’s good news – all things considered. I’ll see you on Monday and we’ll discuss treatment and long-term”

Well thank fuck for that! At least I don’t have to inject my self with poison. I can deal with that – and I can tell KB.

Monday 18th December – Final results appointment + diagnosis =

CONGRATULATIONS!! You’re a winner!!!

You only have a rare autoimmune disease that we don’t know much about but we can give you mood altering weight gaining steroids for symptoms but not much else. We don’t know what causes it, your symptoms can disappear as quickly as they appeared and never reappear, or you could get lung damage. You’ll have to come to the hospital once a month for a full workup.

BTW – how are your eyes feeling? Tired? Warm? Cause this could affect your eyes and your brain too.

Sarcoidosis is now your long time companion.

Gee! Thanks Doc Turner – you’re my hero.

Everything was made right literally in one afternoon, an afternoon where I felt so shitty, couldn’t catch my breath, breathing was painful and my constant coughing made me want to die.

I get to call my mother and tell her – it kinda went like this

[Me -ZB] Hey KB, so I have something to tell you. I quit my job on Halloween… [KB] Oh Shit man Zara! That was 2 months ago [ZB] yeah but I just had 2 offer conversations with 2 companies & I’ll decide on one of them later today, so the job situ is in hand. [KB] mmm hmmm [ZB] Annnnddd, I was being tested for Lung Cancer, Lymphoma & Sarcoidosis, but I only have Sarcoidosis. The best of the 3. [KB] What you saying? [ZB] {Long version as above} [KB] OK, well good thing you there and not here. You are my special child. First it’s your special mouth disease [that is another story – missing some jaw bone]

Ma asked some really good questions and we lime for a lil while on the Skype.

Hardest part done – So now, we sort shit out.

The job is decided on, I’m now the Head of People for a Games Company.

New Meds –

Getting my steroids via inhaler – straight to the lungs, minimise the side effects of steroids in the blood. I know the steroids would have given me a real reason to be fat but the mood swing business, I wasn’t really in the mood for nah!

More Codeine = more constipation – so increase on the prunes and keep on with the greens.

True Story – I’ve been on some form of codeine for the last month – A couple weeks ago, I’m sitting on my toilet for 20 minutes, my legs are numb and I’m crying with frustration cause really I’m a 36 yr old constipated woman, and all I want is for this shit to no longer be a turtle and become a drowned log. I have a coughing episode and all that shit comes barrelling out! The biggest most literal F-ough (fart+cough) that ever existed!!

So now it’s the road to getting right, I have to be a bridesmaid in Court’s wedding and I’ve got 3 months to be able to breathe while I walk down her aisle.

I’m thrilled that I don’t have to tell my mother + sister that I have cancer at the same time of year we found out and lost my father to cancer.

I get to be on a special list for people with Special Diseases. I call it “exotic”.

I’ll lose the next 30lbs probably without much annoying exercise simply because I have to cut out all inflammatory foods and my body seems to be on that trajectory, once the vaporise steroids don’t get in the way.

And I get to learn more about this odd disease and I won’t be receiving a ridiculous hospital bill.

Everyone is now caught up and I wish you all a brilliant year and all the good things.

2018 is setting up to be a smash hit! I’m pretty excited.

Walk good

xoxo.

I am a patient on House + Greys’ Anatomy First & most importantly - All my love and thanks to my family, who know how much/little to check in on me and not ask too many/too few questions - DeeDee, Tins, Curtis, Manon, Chants, Casey…

#2018 #dealwithit #health #life #sarcoidosis #shithappens

0 notes