#but at least in 2006 they seemed to have an amazing friendship

[this-is-a-love-story-isnt-it]

I’ve just been watching tons of Sandra Bullock interviews, and some of my favorites are the ones where her and Keanu Reeves did interviews together for The Lake House and just basically waxed poetic about how much they love and respect each other

#also my favorite story that came out of those interviews is that #he went to her wedding and hung out with her all day and stayed until the end hhrjenska #it’s so hard not to ship them lmao #i mean i know nothing about their current friendship status bc this was 16 years ago #i’m sure they’re still friends tho bc they also stayed friends between Speed and The Lake House #but at least in 2006 they seemed to have an amazing friendship #and you can’t help but ship them except you can’t bc she was married at the time #sandra bullock #keanu reeves

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I bought Jon Richardson’s book a couple of years ago. It was from 2010, the cusp between his radio years and his panel show years, and I wasn’t sure what Jon Richardson to expect from it. I hadn’t bought it in the two years before that, even though those two years contained the peak of Jon Richardson phase (Basically what happened is… you know how in 2024, I decided to try to stop drinking at the same time as I got really into John Robins and that led to possibly over-identifying with the material? Well in 2020/2021, I discovered Jon Richardson not long after I’d moved out of living with my best friend because I kept having breakdowns about not being able to control every tiny thing about our shared space and also life in general and it made me terrible to live with, and it nearly broke up a friendship and ruined much of my life, and getting into Jon Richardson at that point created a similar effect. I’m still a bit amazed at the number of hours I put into watching every single episode of 8 Out of 10 Cats/Catsdown and listening to all 125 hours of a radio show from 2006-2008, among other things, but that was at least a bit of the reason why. Incidentally, my friend and I have recently become roommates again as I have become less difficult to live with/he bought a house and needs help paying the mortgage, it’s actually been going very well so far, he cleans more than he used to and I have fewer breakdowns than I used to about things not all being as I want them, and genuinely, I think my Jon Richardson phase helped with the latter part of that as it made me recognize some of some of my own maladaptive patterns and get better at consciously letting things go. Also, the world ended between then and now and the problems we used to have don’t seem to matter as much anymore), because I’d seen the cover and it looked like it was sort of marketed as a zany dating guide for quirky people. I thought that might have been the beginning – or an early pre-empting – of Jon Richardson taking all my favourite things about himself and packaging them into something much neater and blander and more marketable that was still fun for a while but eventually descended into a caricature. So even when I was watching everything else he’d ever done, I never bought his book.

Until a couple of years ago, when I actually looked it up, and found that it seemed different from what I’d expected. I looked up the consumer reviews and jumped to the ones with the fewest stars, because that’s how I usually do that. If I’m looking up something’s reviews, I don’t need to hear about its best features, the marketing will tell me that anyway. I want to know if its worst features are things I won’t mind. The worst reviews for Jon Richardson’s book all complained that it was too depressing, that he was sort of messed up in a fun and relatable way on panel shows and they bought the book because they liked that, but in this book he just comes off as a horrible nightmare and it’s hard to read. And I said, great, that’s exactly the version of Jon Richardson I want. So I bought the book, read it, greatly enjoyed it, cried several times, it’s fine. It was very much that version, the book might be the darkest I've ever seen him get.

I was thinking of that today (partly because in light of recent events that version of Jon Richardson might be… nope I’m sticking to no comment on that), when I read Steve Bennett’s review of Tom Ballard’s new show. Chortle gave him 4.5 stars last year for a show I loved, so I was curious to see if he could live up to it this year. He didn’t at least in Chortle’s eyes – he was down to 3.5.

However, once again, I was able to establish how much I’ll like a show but what criticisms are levelled against it. If Steve had said that Tom Ballard hit strong material last year but has now reverted back to relying more often on cheap shock value-based sex jokes, then I’d probably still have wanted to see the new show (I do like a lot of the cheap shock value-based sex jokes in Tom’s older shows, but I think he’s better when he’s using them fairly sparingly and around more interesting stuff), but I’d have been less excited about it.

However, Steve Bennett didn’t say that. He said the most negative points about this show were that Tom Ballard is too loud, too relentless, too over the top in his efforts to bludgeon the audience with his points. And that is my favourite Tom Ballard. I know it’s not for everyone, I genuinely think that’s fine, I’m not even sure why I like shouty comedy in a few circumstances (Nish Kumar, white gay Australian Nish Kumar Tom Ballard, Jen Brister, Michael Legge) and find it unbearably annoying in most others. If you find it unbearably annoying in the forms where I like it, then that's absolutely fair enough. But personally, I'd be quite upset if anyone told me that Tom Ballard is not going to come to Edinburgh this year and relentlessly bludgeon us over the head with his shouty angry points.

Also, that bit the review references, in which he takes Tweets out of context, sounds pretty bad - ironically, when described out of context - but actually, I found that pretty funny in his video from this year's MCIF gala:

Now that I listen to that again, I might actually find that really annoying if it came from a different comedian. But I felt like I could watch Tom Ballard read that list all day.

A bunch of those new MCIF reviews look interesting. The Laura Davis one has probably pushed them to the top of my list of people for whom I could buy Edinburgh tickets right now, but haven't booked them yet (so everyone except Nish and DO'D for that), but should probably just fucking book them because there's no way they'll get pushed off the final cut of my must-see list. Laura's probably just ahead of Tom Ballard on that list. The MCIF reviews have kicked Greg Larsen and Zoe Coombs Marr up a couple of places on the list, probably. Oh, and I've become somewhat obsessed with the 2023 Dan Rath special that I just watched a couple of days ago. There are too many things. I can't go to the UK and spend the entire time watching Australians.

Anyway, to summarize the post, the Tom Ballard review reminded me of that Jon Richardson review that made me want to buy it more, various events of this week have also reminded me of my Jon Richardson phase, a phase I have now moved past and look back on with anything from mild sheepishness to full-blown mortification (to the occasional bout of "actually, you know what, I think I was right about that"), but to be fair to Jon, that's how I look back on most things.

#Youtube

[danzafila]

What's the timeline for Carol Danvers and Jessica Drew's friendship supposed to be? Because after Avengers Annual #10 Jess go to live in Madripoor with Lindsay McCabe while Carol leave Earth feeling she do not have any real friends on Earth, and I... don't recall them even acknowledging each other's existence ever again (even under Claremont's pen) before Bendis? At least before Alias. But Bendis himself has Jess state that Carol was her closest friend before being abducted by Veranke in his 1/2

lol, as with much of comic books, it’s a lot of handwaving and playing fast and loose with canon. Especially with Jess, as the Veranke swap really muddies what of her history was actually hers.

I’m not as familiar with Carol’s pre-2000s history to pinpoint when exactly she left the Starjammers and returned to earth for good, but she’s definitely back by the 2000s–she’s back on earth and on the Avengers by the launch of Avengers v3 in 1998. As for Jess, it's a bit inconsistent (she pops up in Madripoor again later in Wolverine v2 and Heroes for Hire v1 in 1998), but I think it's safe to assume Jess (and Lindsay) moved back to the US after she stopped appearing as a regular in Wolverine (around issue 30 in 1990). Now, granted she would've moved back to San Francisco with Lindsay (as seen in the Sensational Spider-Man Annual (1996), which I believe is her first post-Wolverine regular appearance), but she does eventually move to New York when she gets wrapped up in mentoring Mattie (starting in Amazing Spider-Man v2, then carrying over into Spider-Woman v3 in 1999-2000). That leaves a decent chunk of time for the two to be in the same city to reconnect and establish a friendship, albeit off screen.

You mention Brian Reed writing Carol hadn’t known Jess well in She-Hulk: Sensational (2010), but he actually did write them as close friends in Ms. Marvel v2 (2006-2010) (specifically, that first issue with Carol saying they’re close friends when introducing them grabbing brunch together), which I think is what established for a lot of subsequent writers (and fans) their modern friendship. The She-Hulk:Sensational (2010) story is a big point of confusion because, while it was published after Ms. Marvel v2, New Avengers v1 (2005-2010), and Secret Invasion (2008-2009) (where Jess and Carol are established friends), it actually takes place at some indeterminate time earlier in continuity, prior to Secret Invasion.

(I’d put it occurring somewhere after Spider-Woman v3 (1999/2000, when Jess was mentoring Mattie), but probably before Alias (2003) and definitely before Giant-Size Spider-Woman/New Avengers (2005) and Ms. Marvel v2 (2006), as this is before she’s been roped back into Hydra/SHIELD. But you could argue it belongs as far back as just after the Sensational Spider-Man Annual (1996, when she meets Julia Carpenter and seemingly has her powers fully restored), as her powers appear to be fully functioning here again (so possibly before Spider-Woman v3 where she gets depowered again by Charlotte). But Marvel was pretty inconsistent after Spider-Woman v1 ended with whether her powers were working or not and how well they were working until they permanently restored them in Secret Invasion.)

My best guess is sometime during/after Ms. Marvel ended, Reed realized that there was no point where Jess and Carol actually were established as close friends, he’d just written them like they always were. So since he had the opportunity to write an earlier (nebulous) in the continuity story, decided to write about the impetuous for their friendship. Seeing Jess in trouble with Hydra, Carol regretfully admits to Jen that she’d never gotten close to Jess after Jess had saved her life. But the story ends with Carol offering Jess her support in the future. Seems like a good set up for why they're close by the time of Ms. Marvel v2/the events surrounding her kidnapping/rescue in Secret Invasion.

#am i uhhh ever capable of writing a normal number of words about jessica drew? lol no #sorry this is both so late and so long anon OTL #ask me about jessica drew and i can't stop talking and also get sidetracked re-reading about a million old comics lmao #anyways. i ended up adjusting my read order/tweaking the chronology of it a bit thanks to this ask! #(/can share if it would help clear up further confusion! i started annotating what happened in guest appearances so hopefully it's clearer) #problems is i don't believe in h*pless so i stopped updating my master read order around ANAD lol #anonimo #domande #sto parlando #jess meta #ramblings about comix #jessica drew #spider woman

[littlewomenpodcast]

Book Jo´s feminine qualities (that many like to ignore)

Niina: Somebody commented on my Instagram that there are a lot of people who say that they are like Jo, but then they are actually not at all like the book Jo, because the book Jo, there are some boyish things that she likes but then she also likes to be a mother and she loves all boys, she wants to start a school for boys and then she also likes to knit and make clothes and she likes to read romance novels and she cries when she reads them. She adores her niece and her nephew and she loves Friedrich´s nephews. She has some very feminine qualities. Christina: When you say that it reminded me.. I made it a while ago but it sticks with me. I said something like If Jo was present in the modern day and this is again because I was..very cringeworthy but I was also this girl too..Like 2006-2008-2012 time when the girls were just like "I am not like other girls" and they made it seem like, if you like the color pink or if you are like this, if you like make-up, you like wearing dresses, was almost like a negative quality and I think Jo would have been that type of girl in the beginning of the novel. She would have been that "I am not like the other girls-girl" and what makes her relatable at least to me is that throughout the book she realizes there is nothing really wrong with liking those things, that is why I say she learned to understand herself better. I can have some of the more stereotypical boyish qualities and still like the girly things but someone ...it sticks with me forever, they replied saying "You are an idiot" and then they per-ceded to block me. They didn´t want me just long enough for me to see it and I was like "let me check that again" they blocked me and I wasn´t like saying that "oh Jo was a terrible person. No I am saying that she is a flawed person and that is how her character grows. She grows from being "I don´t care" "girls are stupid" "boys don´t have any drama" to be like there are nice things about being a girl and there is nothing wrong with that.

It is amazing how some people just say that love Jo or know Jo and then say stuff like that I believe, maybe you have seen it someone had like favorite literally character Jo March - and then said something like "oh then they gave up their independence to marry that old professor" and I´m like first of all, you don´t know the book, if you´d knew the book you would have seen how that went down and I don´t think you really care about the character as much to say or to make a claim that Jo gave up her independence. She is not that great of a character because she did that in marrying a man that loved and supported her and honestly I think as "unromantic" as they are they probably have one of the most romantic proposal scenes I have ever seen in book or a movie.

(laughter)

Niina: That´s true :D

Christina: It is amazing how some people just they think they have an idea of a character and I almost sometimes think "that´s so Laurie of you". You have this perceived image of what Jo is and what you want Jo to be when the truth is Jo is not like that. You just want her to be that way and it happens to be most of the time the Jo and Laurie shippers that have that sort of delusional idea of who Jo is supposed to be.

Niina: I think the whole idea of "not being like the other girls" it comes from very deep misogyny. This idea that you are better than fellow women. It is a form of misogyny and it was a trend some time ago. Hopefully not so much these days. I think one of the problems with Jo especially when she was younger was that she identified so much with the masculine that she became very misogynistic and you can see that when she makes fun of Meg wanting to go to a ball or Amy trying to impress her female friends but then she grows out of that and I think a lot of that has to do with her and Laurie´s friendship. Not fading but she is growing out of it. Laurie has some great qualities but he sort of embodies that 19th century typical young man, the way they behaved. Jo got some really bad influences from him and he from her and I think she kind of tries to block her emotions sometimes because she feels that if people see her showing emotions, then people are going to see her weaker and when people see her more weaker, she is more feminine to them. She also grows out of that as well.

Christina: That is why I think it is even more moving to see her character development because she goes from someone who is being so closed off "No this is not tears -I just got something in my eyes" type of person to be open to take advice from people or open to criticism or open to wanting to grow because I think it is very much cycling thing when you are told just hold it in because it is going to be seen as weak and in some way I was a very sensitive person but I was always told that in a very negative light so I was like alright you know what I am just trying to hold it in and that was not healthy at all and it was almost seen in away kind of very feminine thing "oh you know she is just an emotional little thing, poor thing". In some cases I was right, what they said was very rude or mean but boys will be boys and you are just being too emotional over it. Having Jo learn how to be more open and accepting and to have a positive influence like her mom and Friedrich, just to name a few, that just. It´s okay, there is nothing wrong being vulnerable. It doesn´t mean that you are weak, it just means that you are open to having other people help you and sometimes that´s the hardest thing is to admit to say that I need help or this is bothering me or I don´t know what to do because if you are that person who is like "yeah sure I know what you´re doing, yeah I totally know that and you don´t" that can cause a lot more problems. For me I had to sort of unlearn that behavior because it didn´t help me in the slightest. Now I live by the motto "If I don´t know it, I´ll ask for help"I admit that I am being "an idiot" rather than make myself look even more of an idiot than pretending that I know what I am doing.

Niina: Yeah and I think it is a very long process for Jo to unlearn those habits. In Little Men, there is Nat´s character. She calls him "girly" and she sees him weaker than the other boys because he is so sensitive, and he has similarities with Laurie. It is not that Friedrich is not sensitive. He is not as sensitive as Laurie is.. how would I put it..he is a lot more grounded, when Laurie is very idealistic, head in the clouds.

Christina: I guess if I had to think of it, Laurie is who I was when I was in school. Where I just took everything and made it full blown as now I am more like Friedrich, where it´s like "that hurts but let´s try to see what is the best way to respond to that very sensitive moment".

Niina: It is a much more mature response. You try not to take everything too emotionally or too personally. Laurie was like that and I think to some extend Jo was like that when she was younger.

#little women #little women podcast #not like the other girls #jo march #june allyson #winona ryder #saoirse ronan #misogyny #greta gerwig #anti greta gerwig #laurie lawrence #friedrich bhaer

[mahixa]

why you all should read Momentum - an epic story of Remus and Sirius

Written by amazing, wonderful and talented Children of the Shadows, the story is “an epic tale of Remus and Sirius's lives, starting from the very beginning. A love that carries on through trials, tribulations, and war.”

The author portrays all of the characters (including James, Peter, Lily and others) with such incredible depth that the actual writer of HP (what’s her name... don’t remember, don’t care lol) should learn how to write characters from this fanfiction. I know there’s some of you who were not in the fandom in 2006, and maybe some of you prefer to read fics from like, 2010s, and that’s okay! Although the story was not published on ao3 (so on the page that everyone is familiar with right now, all the young and old fans) and it was finished almost 13 years ago, please don’t feel discouraged and give it a try. It’s worth it. I promise.

So here are some of my favourite things about Momentum:

everyone has personality which is complex and complicated and there’s a lot going on here. Any personal struggles, doubts, heartbreaks, hope? - it’s all there, and it’s written like.... *chef’s kiss*

the. connection. between. Remus. and. his. family. It’s so so so important to show his relation with his family members, especially with his parents, because it just adds depth to his character, so he doesn’t seem like a guy who’s only purpose is to be Sirius’s boyfriend. He has other relations, and they are explored in this fic (his friendship with Lily and James is powerful in this one).

James. James Potter. The way he is written here? Magic. Trust me. Like... trust me. You’re not gonna regret it. James is the real MVP.

characters act in a way that is logical and in character for them, and they are not like... cheesy or sappy or two-dimensional whatever reason. They have flaws and act like a human being could act. They make mistakes and have doubts and ask questions and can be problematic. But they learn. The GROWTH in this fic is so wonderful

gay issues and difficulties written accordingly to the period of time (70s). The author pays tribute to how brave the gay people were back then and shows us different aspects of being gay at that time (self-doubt, family issues, that fear of how everyone is going to react, violence, slurs, gay clubs, this impossibility to touch in public. Unfortunately, fucking unfrotunately, in so many cases it still remains to be a huge problem for many of us, but what I’m saying is that it’s important to acknowledge how it used to be as well. I’m not saying these problems are gone now, of course). Sometimes fic writers tend to forget about it and all these aspects and just write these two as being openly and loudly gay - and as much as I would LOVE for all of us, all the amazing LGBTQA+ people to always be able to be ourselves as loudly and openly as we would like to be, it was (and still is in many cases, fuck it, I hate it) not entirely possible.

the humour. This story can be really funny and there were times when I had literal tears in my eyes from laughing so hard when I read it for the first time

James and Lily being the power couple

Sirius and James being brothers BUT them being Remus’s best friends as well

the angst. the angst is really painful. but the fluff. it’s worth it, for the fluff that comes after the pain.

so beautifully written. All the descriptions, all the words, ah, it’s just... it is so easy to read and get lost in it. The dialogues are very realistic (which is, again, another problem that may appear in some fics) and are written in character for these people

the order of the phoenix stuff with the Weasleys and other characters THIS IS GREAT them all being young and brave

Sirius saying bye bitch to his racist family but this not being easy for him, which again - any normal human being would find that hard

Remus and Sirius being in love. But oh boy. This love right here? It’s a totally new definition of loving somebody.

REMUS. AND. SIRIUS. RAISING. HARRY.

here are some of my favourite quotes so you could see what I mean with all of this:

Whoever said Sirius Black and James Potter were the most charismatic and attractive third years in Hogwarts were either insanely blind or were yet to meet Remus Lupin. At least in Sirius's opinion.

***

After all, he [Remus] was anything but normal. There was no way of putting it subtly, the world hated people like him, and he knew for a fact that he was not going to receive any sort of affection from them. So, he craved their love and when his parents got their sudden attacks of overwhelming affection, he clung on to them and returned their embraces and small declarations of love. [...] John Lupin stared into those soft amber eyes, and he let his hand slide, caressing his son's face through the thin glass. 'Love you,' he mouthed before moving away, and Remus nodded.

***

[After Sirius’s prank had gone wrong and Remus ended up in the infirmary]:

'Don't you think the flowers and chocolates are a bit too much, Sirius?' asked James as they walked towards the infirmary.

Sirius finger combed his hair. It was getting a bit too long and he'd sort of grown to like it that way. 'It's called courtesy, James, but I wouldn't expect you to know anything about it.'

'Really? I thought you gave people flowers and chocolates on Valentines Day,' teased James, winking mischievously at Sirius.

***

'Don't be ridiculous, Sirius,' his mother snapped, looking up at him with cold hard eyes. 'Gryffindor is laden with all kinds of lowly people – half bloods, and mudbloods, and what not. I hope you aren't fraternising with any of them.'

Sirius put down his fork and looked his mother directly in the eye. 'I am; three of them in fact.'

***

Sirius caught Remus's hand just as it was about to move away and kissed the heel of his palm softly. 'How were the full moons?' he asked, his lips brushing over Remus's wrist with every word he spoke.

***

[Remus, on the phone with Sirius]

'I'm in muggle jail!' Sirius exclaimed happily and there was an ominous silence that followed.

It was broken by the strangled sounds of Remus asphyxiating. 'WHAT?'

'I know, isn't it fantastic?' Sirius asked, obviously misreading the tone of Remus's voice as excitement. It didn't help that James had fallen to the floor in hysterics and was screaming 'brilliant!' between uncontrollable laughter.

***

[The kiss] It was heat. Heat like they'd never experienced before and an overbearing pressure pushing against them, drawing their bodies closer and closer together. They were drowning in each other, suffocating, completely out of control.

#wolfstar #remus lupin #sirius black #remus lupin x sirius black #sirius black x remus lupin #sirius black/remus lupin #remus lupin/sirius black #gay #fic #james potter and remus lupin #lily evans #lily potter #marauders #the marauders era #the marauders #harry potter

[rgedgwe]

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[mangamushi]

Thoughts on Saikyou Densetsu Kurosawa

FUKUMOTO Nobuyuki, 11 volumes, published from 2003 to 2006 in Big Comic Original (Seinen)

Saikyou Densetsu Kurosawa (Legend of the strongest man Kurosawa) follows the story of 44 years old construction worker Kurosawa as he realizes he spent most of his life without any meaningful connections with anyone nor any special achievements. He decides to change his life so that he can become proud of his own accomplishments and efforts, and earn respect and appreciation from the people around him.

(spoiler warning)

So I’m currently binging Fukumoto manga, after having them on my “plan to read” list for several years…I started with Kaiji, but initially the first manga of his that caught my interest was Kurosawa. The themes of it are right up my alley, and I like main characters that are not teenagers or young adults.

Kurosawa has a sequel, Shin Kurosawa: Saikyou Densetsu, which is a direct continuation. I’ll mostly be focusing on the first part here. 

The art is typical Fukumoto style. Odd at first, definitely not the prettiest nor the most impressive out there, but it does the job and I really grew to like it. He doesn’t hesitate to give exaggerated features to his characters, and I actually find the deliberate ugliness of the character designs refreshing. It certainly fits the story of Kurosawa, makes the characters very expressive and works well with the often comedic tone. 

Although the art looks simple, Fukumoto can deliver very intense pages when he needs to. 

His forte is in his use of narration combined with the picture, rather than in the drawings alone. He is a master at using a narrator’s comments or the character’s thoughts to raise tension and make the manga flow better.

 Kurosawa is definitely written with a lot of heart. Both the manga itself and the titular character, feel very genuine. Kurosawa is very flawed and very human. He is rough but powerful, his desires are simple, and he is straightforward in his reactions, to the point that his impulsive nature and lack of social restraints put him in trouble, especially when it comes to women...

There are a few instances however where he comes close to harassing women, which is played for laugh, which I disliked. Those scenes made me less sympathetic towards him as he actually deserved the repercussions of his actions here.

But besides those chapters, Kurosawa is overall a likeable character, easy to sympathize with and to root for as we see him at a low point of his life.

He is clumsy in his interactions with his coworkers, which, coupled with his hot-temper, often leads to misunderstandings and prevents him from getting closer to them despite his best efforts. I actually found Kurosawa’s failed attempts at achieving popularity reminiscent of Watamote. The beginning of both series, in which a pathetic main character fails repetitively at gaining the appreciation of their peers through outlandish strategies, elicits the same mixture of pity, second-hand embarrassment, and amusement.

Kurosawa also gets into a fair number of fights. While those fight-focused chapters were not bad, I was personally less into them.

Drawing literal fist-fights in not what Fukumoto’s best at. His character’s postures are somewhat stiff, which he compensates for with heavy use of speed-lines. It is okay-ish, but I want read a fight scene, there’s plenty of fighting manga out there that can do a better job. 

 I like Fukumoto more when he writes more psychological battles, like in his gambling mangas. Of course, psychological elements and strategies where not totally absent from the fights, but it was nowhere as much as in his gambling manga. Sometimes I think Kurosawa was a bit too lucky in the fights, as he is not a very athletic person nor someone with a lot of experience in fighting. It did not feel very convincing to me.

Besides, it is through these battles that Kurosawa gathers allies, a reputation and respect. But most of his opponents are teenagers, even middle-schoolers ! Granted they are very scary teenagers, but I still fail to see how a 44 years old man throwing hands with teenagers is such a praise worthy thing...

 I think I prefer to see Kurosawa fight and struggle to improve his life in a less literal way that actual physical fighting.

I haven’t read that many of Fukumoto’s works yet, but I feel like an important theme in them is perseverance/resilience. He puts his characters through a lot, but they tend to have some form of resistance that shines through as admirable. Kurosawa’s will to fight and to push back against adversity is sometimes the only thing he has left, and it is extremely important.

However, that is not an innate ability that comes to him easily -at times Kurosawa hides, flees, cowers. He hesitates, and he needs to think things through before he actually decides to fight.

Fukumoto: You know how protagonists in shonen manga do things like jump in to stop their classmate from being bullied without thinking about how they might get beaten up themselves? I always felt that wasn’t real. So with Kurosawa, I wanted to make a manga that shows hesitation, and how it actually isn’t so easy to defend people like that.

(Excerpt from this interview)

I like this kind of manga where characters reflect about what is the right decision to take and on how they should be living their life. And how the reader has access to their inner turmoil and thoughts. 

 His strength is often born from sheer desperation and desire to survive. It is when he is cornered that he can manage to act and fight even when the odds are against him. He has to make do with the very few tools and options he has, which leads him to elaborate unconventional tactics to win over his opponents. 

Having cornered underdogs characters winning over more powerful, but less desperate, opponents seems like a running theme in Fukumoto’s manga (cf. the made-up E-card Game from Kaiji, in which The Slave is the only card that can win against The Emperor, precisely because it is so low that it has nothing to lose anymore).

In a way, one could argue Kurosawa follows a formula reminiscent of classic shounen manga: a character who is below average at first rises to a heroic status through willpower, effort and after fighting a string of opponents. However, there are major differences that set Kurosawa apart, besides the older characters and more adult setting (Kurosawa’s worries are grounded in reality: growing old alone, financial problems...) Kurosawa does not provide escapism and dreams. The story begins with Kurosawa as a single old man, and ends with him an even older still single man. He does not become an amazing fighter through power boost and magic training like a shounen character might.

He does want to dream big, but all things considered, his achievements are fairly modest. He is not saving the world or becoming hokage.  At most he is just helping some other marginalized people from his neighborhood.  

Even if he puts his life on the line to fight, what he accomplished will fade into oblivion at some point.

But, even so, his efforts and struggle are still admirable.

Besides, Kurosawa is not about friendship, at least not the kind of friendship you find in shounen manga.

In Fukumoto’s manga, people may stick together for survival, they can share intense emotions when put through the same ordeals, but it’ll rarely turn into true companionship. Kurosawa is alone from the start, and while he does connect with other people throughout the story, in the sequel those relationships are left behind as he leaves on his own to start a new life. 

Fukumoto: My protagonists, on the other hand, are always alone – not only do they not have followers, they don’t even have friends. (laugh) [...]  I can’t do manga where the characters readily make friends that they risk their lives for. I started out by drawing short human drama pieces, but even then – partially because I wasn’t doing long-term series, but – they weren’t generally stories about friends.

I was kind of expecting Asai, one of Kurosawa’s coworker, to have a bigger role, but that didn’t happen. (I liked the part where he tried to comfort Kurosawa after he got humiliated so I was hoping for more!)

The story isn’t very cohesive or straighforward, it just follows Kurosawa’s life, who wants to change but lacks a clearly defined goal or road to follow. There isn’t one big coherent plot, instead the story goes in different directions, shifting from one genre to another from chapter to chapter. Kurosawa even admits it himself !

The quality of the chapters and different arcs is in my opinion rather uneven. 

 There are some really powerful scenes, notably the very end of the manga which is very touching. Kurosawa successfully leads a group of homeless men to defend themselves against some delinquents who were threatening them, but as a result of his injuries, he is implied to die. (The sequel manga reveals he actually just goes into coma for 8 years). It is bittersweet ending as he finally achieved something and is surrounded by human warmth.

                  Shin Kurosawa, the sequel, is similar to the first part, though slightly more light-hearted and focused on humor (even though Kurosawa’s situation technically worsens!). It seems to be less liked than the first part for those same reasons, but I personally enjoy Fukumoto’s humor and his more slice of life-y mangas. It has many genuinely funny moments. Once in a while there are still some chapters that feel deeper/more thought provoking, as Fukumoto likes to reflect about society, life, and humanity in his stories.

For anyone looking for other manga with similar themes, I can recommend Furuya Minoru’s excellent Wanitokagegisu . Both feature very lonely adult men who wish to turn their life around, and oscillate between humor and psychological drama.

#fkmt #saikyou densetsu kurosawa #fukumoto noboyuki #kurosawa #manga

[jq37]

The Report Card -- Fantasy High Sophomore Year Ep 1

Sophomores and Spring Break 

Note: Hey guys! I decided to try something a little bit different and slightly more structured than my usual recaps for FH: Sophomore Year. I’m hoping this will be a little easier for me and a more useful tool for keeping up to date since there will be a lot more eps to keep track of and they’ll be easier to miss. Lemme know what you think and if you want raw, unfiltered opinions on anything specific, feel free to send me an ask. I’m always down to go off about literally whatever. 

We’re back, baby! It is Sophomore Year at Aguefort and the gang is on Spring Break. A lot is going down so lemme break it down. The Bad Kids, having defeated Kalvaxus last year, are all entitled to a share of his hoard and all the red tape is finally cleared so they all get 20k gold each (which is an insane amount of money converted to USD if you use the WOTC conversion rate of a gold coin being around $145 (circa 2006 when they answered the question)--which would be close to $330 with inflation). Jawbone and Sandra-Lynn are moving in after less than a year into a profoundly haunted house and it’s kind of a Full House situation because Adaine, Fig, Kristen, and Tracker all officially live there (plus it seems that Zayn has also anchored himself to Adaine’s tower--btw, Adaine took the tower that the haunted house obviously has) and you know all the other Bad Kids are gonna be there on the regular. 

More importantly, Aguefort gives the gang their big project for the year--finding the crown of the Nightmare King which was stolen at the end of last season--which is worth 60% of their grade (Adaine does a full Hermione at this information). Each of the gang has info about the NK but the trail has mostly gone cold. Luckily, Fabian just got a hot tip about where Falinel is keeping Aelwyn and she seems like a pretty good lead to start with since she was super tied up in the bad side of all the messiness of last year. Adaine is displeased to say the least. 

Going off to find the crown is super exciting story-wise for two reasons. First of all, it means the gang gets to hire, well, hirelings to help them and temporarily join the party! They ping basically every cool NPC they can think of (except for Tracker for some reason which is BONKERS because (1) she probably would have done it for free and cutting her in would still be keeping the money in the family, (2) she’s dope as hell, (3) she’s a cleric and the party can always use more healers, (4) she’s a werewolf so presumably she has skills that would help in the woods, and (5) they’re t r a c k i n g down a crown and the girl’s name is literally T R A C K E R, but I will not backseat D&D) and eventually end up with Ragh (who has been without an adventuring party all year, poor guy), Sandra-Lynn (swayed by a nat 20 rolled by Fig), Cathilda (!?) ,and, for some reason, Gilear (which Fabian is happy about, mainly for the opportunity to maybe bump him off on the way). Second of all, if you recall, Elmville is a pretty modern town but the rest of the continent is less fantasy high, more high fantasy. Horses and lanterns and all that pseudo-medieval goodness. They are gonna stick out like a sore thumb. I am very here for it. 

Everyone goes home to rest up but, after some ominous dreams, only four of them wake up. Riz and Fig are left asleep and then Brennan mic drops and ends the episode which is a power move and I am extremely upset about it but also, respect. Right for the jugular immediately. I heard Murph and Emily are on tour in the UK next week which probably has something to do with this but, in the moment, I did not know that and I really felt the hammer drop in my heart. It was wild. Cannot wait to see where we go from here. Plus, who doesn’t love watching characters freak out because their friends are in danger?

Random Thoughts

I have no idea what the title of this episode is or if it’ll even have one and not a number but I gave it a placeholder one for now. I also don’t have access to the stream yet so I didn’t get to include some info I wanted to (like a record of nat 20s, and nat 1s so I can track their stats for the school year) and I probably missed some stuff because my brain can only hold so much info guys. I’m not Brennan. 

I mentioned this yesterday during the stream, but there will never be anything better than the pure D&D joy of everyone, in character, talking over each other to clown on each other. They get the friend-group banter that’s a hair breadth’s away from bullying so true to life and it’s so fun to watch. On the flip side, the opening scene with everyone introducing themselves and affirmatively claiming each other as their best friends was also peak D&D. Found family= best trope. 

Fig and Adaine burn spell-slots at basically the same time to try and beat each other to the best room in the (Scooby-Doo ass) house--which is exactly the kind of thing that would happen in this world. It’s such an intuitive setting. I love it so much. (BTW, Fig ends up staying in the false space under the revolving grand piano because, of course).

Fabian and Gorgug went to recruit Ragh, who assumed they were propositioning him for a three-way. In his defense, they did do it in a super proposition-y way and they were in the middle of the LGBTQ student union.

Also, Gorgug gives Ragh an inspiring speech about thinking you’re your own dad which makes him burst into tears. 

Speaking of, Jawbone offhandedly says he’s poly but, like, based on some of the stuff he’s said, I feel like that’s not really a reveal. He also gets along well with Gorthalax and would be down w/ a three-way if Sandra-Lynn wanted to which, again, totally checks out. 

Arthur Aguefort uses Chronomancy to rewind time and catch a snide comment Adaine made under her breath, which is exactly the kind of frivolous use of God-like power I’d expect from him.  

I really love Adaine’s energy coming into this season. She’s in therapy. She’s in a good home environment. She’s comfortable enough with her friend group to do stuff like prank Fig (love that they’re gonna be living together now). And she’s good friends with Zayn now which I want to see more of based on their one interaction in this ep which was very cute. I am already on record as saying I would be down with her getting a ghost boyfriend--I mean, for the aesthetic alone--but I’d be happy with just more friendship. 

Fabian is also hilarious this season because you can tell he’s gone a bit soft from having friends and leaning into that (the friendship necklace with Riz) but also he’s fully aware that it’s happening so he’s, like, ping-ponging back and forth like, “These are my friends,” and, “What am I saying? I used to be cool,” and it’s very funny. Very happy the Aelwyn storyline is happening right out of the gate, both because I think Aelwyn is a very interesting character with a lot of potential for nuance but also because Fabian reacting to her and Adaine reacting to Fabian reacting to her is always gold. 

Prompted by an offhand conversation from Fig about rock and roll, Brennan--earning another feather for his Cap of God Tier DMing--goes on an impromptu five minute long improved diatribe about a bard who played such a good concert that it instantly impregnated everyone in attendance (dudes too) who gave birth to kids with sick rocker hair and denim jackets and ascended to Rock Heaven on their 18th Birthday. You truly have to watch it to believe it. At a certain point I thought he was gonna drop it but that was the moment he doubled down and kept going. Amazing. 

Watching Murph, in real time, make up a girl/boy/whateverfriend in Fantasy Canada was a gift. 

I don’t have access to the stream yet but best quote of the night that I can remember is Kristen choosing her room: This is triggering and I’ll take it. (Her line about her lesbian starter kit and the one about wanting a horse were also bangers). 

The group talks about what they’re going to do for transportation outside of Elmsville since they don’t really use cars out there and they somehow get from “disguise Fig’s tour bus” to “commission Aguefort to create a brand new animal that can hold six people plus hirelings, one of which is Fabian who is also riding his motorbike”.

I love that Sandra-Lynn’s Mom Powers work on Tracker. 

Basrar doesn’t accept the invitation to come with on the quest, but he does give Kristen a bag of infinite ice cream sandwiches, which is basically just as good, IMO. 

Oh Gilear. The man is sleeping in the Seacaster garage, being bullied by skater kids, and now he’s stuck on this quest with his ex and Fabian who actively wants him dead.  

Speaking of, I’m psyched to see more of Sandra-Lynn. She was kind of a sleeper badass at the end of last season. 

Ragh is keeping secrets which I hope the cast doesn’t forget because it could be nothing serious (like the high school drama happening with Skrank and the 7 maidens--maybe he’s just crushing on Gorgug who did full kiss him during Promocalypse) or it could be Serious Business that will blow up if the don’t stay on top of it. We’ll see. 

Oh, almost forgot. Adaine wants an emotional support frog. Every time I think I can’t love her more.   

Detention

Fig for Not Respecting Personal Boundaries

Fig goes full Emily right out the gate and, after finding out that Skrank (nerdy bird dude who apparently can get it) was not only dating Ostentasia (rich, popular dwarf) but also dumped her in pursuit of Danielle Barkstock (one of Ostentasia’s party members, the scandal), disguises herself as him with Danielle to figure out what’s going on. And, wouldn't you know it, when she gives herself away, Danielle immediately is shocked and appalled, as you would be, obviously. We also learn that she’s still catfishing Dr. Asha which is, how you say, for sure a crime. Fig, please, I’m begging you. Cease. 

Honor Roll

Fig, Riz, and Adaine for Researching the Nightmare King

Fig made both lists, look at that. Wasn’t my plan for this to be a three-way tie (also didn’t expect to use the word “three-way” this many times in this writeup) but I think their contributions were pretty much equally valuable. Rainsolo on the Discord wrote up this summary of the lore dump Brennan gave them.

#fantasy high #fantasy high spoilers #dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #the report card #report card

[garazza]

Action Comics #1022 Review

“The House of Kent: Part 1″

Starting off, we have the 9-panel grid. Because Tom King likes to use it to show off that he read Watchmen (before promptly abusing the layout to death), everyone and their mother has been scrambling to shove it somewhere in their work and try to get a useless amount of perceived street cred to show that they too had read Watchmen (killing the layout even more). Since it’s all the rage, Bendis does it here.

I actually like the third panel. As Stan Lee said, every comic is someone’s first comic (and this is the first chapter in a “highly” anticipated arc). Instead of an editor’s note, Bendis explains Kelex through dialogue that is expositional but not unnatural or clunky. But why explain Kelex of all things? My answer is well, why not? Supposedly, Conner is as unformed about a lot of things as is a potential new reader and Superman informs him in a manner that is not entirely out place, even to current readers.

Then Conner explains his origin and touches upon the fact that we’ve had a few different continuities since his creation in 1993. He is excited and curious in the first four panels and then immediately deflates in the last four. I think Bendis is trying to have the best of both worlds by writing both an excited Conner (something that fans are supposed to respond positively towards) and a depressed Conner (because he has been a victim of the discontinuity perpetuated by DC editorial and made no better by Bendis).

We get a double-page splash of the two Kents conversing that I like, especially the color of the Fortress. The conversation is very Bendis, but not offensively so. It serves its purpose, can’t be too upset about that. He tries to depict Conner as nervous, but I really hate how it’s done, it’s like reading an accent phonetically.

uwu what’s this? A fundamental misunderstanding and misinterpretation of a character? In my Bendis book? It’s more likely than you think.

Conner has literally never been little. He was created as a teenage clone of Superman and he stayed a teenage clone of Superman. He came out the test tube the punk Metropolis Kid, not the toddling Metropolis Tyke. A really big conceit of his character is that he will never look older or younger than a teenager. That’s why a lot of eyebrows were raised when in his first reappearance Bendis chose to depict him with stubble.

Another example of Bendis-speak that is fun and full of charm and character, but the characterization for the characters who are conversing is just…off. It’s a conversation these types of characters would have, just not these characters specifically.

You know, for a character that supposedly Bendis hates and wants to write off and make inaccessible to all other writers and artists, he sure writes about Jon a lot. Bendis forces Jon into the future, cutting him off not just from everything he knows and loves, but from, more importantly, the readers. This reinforces the gravity and seriousness of him being written off, but Bendis constantly undermines this hostage situation of his own creation by having him come back to the present quite often. You put characters on a bus to make them go away forever, but the bus keeps returning to the station. And the most baffling part? You’re the driver, Bendis! Commit to the fucking bit!

Jon and Braniac 5 are chumming it up, because they are toooooootally buddies, you can read alllllll about Jon’s actual, very real, and totally not non-existent friendships with the Legionnaires in Legion of Super-Heroes by Brian Michael Bendis and Ryan Sook, because Jon totally has finished watching the Legion orientation film that totally didn’t take more than 5 issues to even get him to watch and he wasn’t even interrupted once. The book is soooooo well developed and evenly paced and not at alllllll bloated behind belief.

Jon acts like he came home from college to do laundry and eat some home cooking and forgot to call ahead, like he totally isn’t supposed to stay in the future.

Me, too, Conner. I don’t know who this character is either.

We also get to see his new costume here, which I hate. The one positive thing I could say about this new character when he was first introduced in Bendis’ Superman run was that I really liked his costume. It had the cyber-armor look of the New 52 Superman suit, but wasn’t too over-designed. It worked, it looked cool. This new look is just kinda bleh. It has the ugliness of the New 52 with none of the intricacies that made it look cool and unique.

We were never going to any meeting between the two Superboys that can even remotely be called good or worthwhile. I appreciate the naiveté of certain fans who enjoy things at face value because, factually, they got what they wanted. Fans wanted this meeting and they got it, which will make the happy, but it is not at all satisfying, which is what they should care about.

Bendis has a firm understanding of Superman and his voice. The same cannot be for Jon Kent. This character is not Jon Kent. He is not written out of character because this is not his character. What we got here is not what we wanted. This is Bendis and DC editorial banking that fans will rationalize to themselves that the crumbs they deigned to give fans is actually a feast worthy of praise and exaltation (look no further than Superman #16).

Oh and by the way, this is all we get for the meeting. The rest of the issue is “wHaT’S ThE DeAl cOnNeR KeNt?”

I’m skipping over the Daily Planet stuff because I don’t care about it and it doesn’t piss me off.

Instead, I will quickly address this: “The rumor come out, does Jonathan Kent is gay?”

I want to say this came about because Jon called Conner’s leather jacket “fabulous”, but it seems this idea existed before this issue was even released. The most I can find in relation to Jon being gay is this article written 2016 and this funny little exchange in the comments of one of Bendis’ Instagram posts.

I knew I was not straight when I was in grade school and it would be amazing if such a high profile character like Jon came out. It would normalize the idea that being gay isn’t something exclusively sexual or adult, but that there is nothing wrong for kids to have feelings for someone their own age who is the same sex. But I don’t trust DC to even attempt this. If they can’t even make Dick Grayson bi, then it’s not likely for any other character to come out.

And just because he described something as “fabulous”, that doesn’t make him gay. It’s an odd choice of words, sure, but word choice is no real indication of sexuality. In an interview with ComicPOP, Todd McFarlane described a box for a figure as “sexy” and “sassy” that I might have instead referred to as “cool” or “awesome.” I think Todd’s word choice is oddly fitting, but it was not something I would have thought to use before hearing him use it in the interview, and it does not at all call into his sexuality. I have a similar sentiment about “fabulous.”

Back to the story, Superman takes Conner to meet some of the intellectual experts in the DC universe to help figure out his deal. They have some “fun” Bendis dialogue and touch upon the multiverse and continuity that Bendis has been helping shape even though he literally has never worked for DC until very recently, relatively speakingm and yet is being trusted with the word “crisis.”  And what do you mean you’ve been rebooted at least three times, I thought it was seven times according to Young Justice #1, one of the first issues Bendis wrote for DC.

I saw a Reddit post a little while back that compiled clues and subtle hints that were spread out among several titles, including Tom King, Scott Snynder, and Bendis’ various books, that tied them all together with Doomsday Clock. It demonstrated a remarkable amount of coordination that I thought impossible given who it involved, but the evidence was pretty convincing. However, this was before Dan Didio was fired and they were able to avert 5G. Now that they’ve had time to regroup, I think this issue is sowing some more of those seeds that’ll eventually be dealt with by Synder’s Death Metal.

Here’s some more of that fundamental misunderstanding and misinterpretation of a character. Conner was not “raised” by the Kents. They cared for him, sure, but I wouldn’t call what they did raising.

What is being referred to here is Geoff Johns’ run with Conner Kent in Adventure Comics which took place in 2009. What that contributed to the character was only a relatively recent development in Conner’s history. It should be noted he started living with the Kents in 2002. His solo book was cancelled with Connor being dropped off by Clark at his parent’s house on the very last page. Any sort of “raising” would have occurred off panel during that time and is largely not expanded upon because there was literally no book to depict that kind of relationship until after he had died in 2006 and was brought back in 2009. They are not the sole contributors to his life like it is implied here. He lived in Hawaii and worked for Cadmus for far longer than he lived with the Kents.

And here we have Jon casually referring to Ma and Pa Kent as Grandma and Grandpa like he actually knew them instead of just knowing of them. For those of you don’t know, they were dead when Tomasi and Gleason were writing Superman and were only just recently brought back in Doomsday Clock which concluded well after Tomasi and Gleason had left the book, so Jon never met them. At the absolute most he’s heard stories, looked at pictures, and seen home movies of the Kents. You could say I’m nitpicking, but Bendis deserves it. You can feel his disregard for others’ work throughout his other books, and its panels like this that are the proof.

Jon literally has no reason to know that Ma and Pa Kent are alive. No reason. Jon’s smug face is Bendis’ way of say “Aren’t I a stinker?”

Fuck. You. Bendis.

You do not get to pretend that stories you made impossible to tell of Jon spending time with his grandparents actually did happen. Is this interaction cute and fun and a little bit wholesome? Yes. But is it genuine? Absolutely not. He’s just trying to cash in on what he thinks fans want to see with none of the heart and soul.

And now Clark is acting like Jon is visiting from college.

Piss your pants, Bendis. Jon would never refer to his best friend Damian Wayne like that. If someone else referred to Damian like that when Jon was around, he would correct them and say something along the lines of “He’s not so bad once you get to know him.” Stop pushing the narrative that Damian is some sort of demon hellspawn or psycho killer. He’s a flawed kid with a dark past that wants to be better but struggles with it and needs friends like Jon to support him. This continues to show that Bendis literally does not understand this character and why fans get upset when he writes him this way.

Another 9-panel grid, but this is not Tom King-inspired, but actually befitting the moment. Bendis still think Conner was literally raised by the Kents instead of just living with them, but I really have no skin the game of Conner being recognized as a part of the Kent family, so this doesn’t piss me off much.

I know this is supposed to be emotional because they just reunited, but the dialogue seems to suggest something more ominous and insidious is going on, something bigger than any one of them (Crisis, I know, but its kind of obnoxiously on the nose and yet unnecessarily vague).

The issue actually ends with the story I don’t really care about, so that’s the review.

Note: I realized about part way through writing this post how pissy and whiny I might sound, but I spent too much writing it to not post it.

#action comics #superman #conner kent #superboy #jon kent #legion of super-heroes #brian michael bendis #clark kent #brianiac 5

[noramoya]

#ThrillerLiveCloses #ApprovedByMJon2009

“Right now our world has been turned upside down, with a pandemic that is changing our way of life. It is affecting us all, financially, emotionally and socially. For me it has resulted in THRILLER LIVE closing prematurely (and permanently) in the West End, as all theatres around the country have been shut, in the public’s best interest. Myself and the rest of the team totally understand and respect that we must all practice social distancing, working together to beat this virus. But yesterday was a very sad day as I joined the cast, crew and other creatives at the Lyric Theatre for one last time. We wanted to come together to say goodbye to each other at the theatre that had become our home for the past 11-years. Ironically we were just two more performances away from becoming the 11th longest ever running show in the West End. Still to be 12th, and the longest ever running show at the Lyric Theatre is an incredible achievement. Another thing the coronavirus has shown us is that we never know what is around the corner and we shouldn’t take what we have for granted. Through hard times, we get to see what matters most and what we really need to value.

One of our cast members said that leaving the Lyric Theatre was like losing a loving partner. And that is partly true, in that sometimes you don’t appreciate what you have until it is gone. But I am sure that each and every one of the Thriller Live cast and crew will go on to great new ventures, just as previous associates have. It’s been an INCREDIBLE journey which has formed great friendships, partnerships and even relationships with babies to boot! For me it seems that things have gone full circle. For it was 30 years ago today (20th March 1990) when I first met the King of Pop, Michael Jackson, and he inspired me to see a world of endless possibilities. He showed me humility, kindness and a laughter like I’d never heard before.

We were at Record One Studios where he was free and at his creative best, producing the ‘Dangerous’ album. Watching a genius at work, who since the age of 5 had been perfecting his craft to become the world’s greatest ever entertainer was a true privilege. And then came an invitation to lunch at Neverland. That was the most memorable weekend ever. I’d never seen a landscape and home so beautiful. A place where Michael could dream peacefully, and one could lose themselves in magical abandonment. Which I did playing on the arcades, riding on the funfair and watching movies in the theatre. Just before I left, as I walked out the oak door, Michael said come back anytime. And I did, at least once a year - return to Neverland, as did many lucky fans, and various charitable organisations that Michael opened his doors for, because he loved to give, help and see others happy. That was the Michael Jackson I knew - a humble, innocent soul, who also happened to be one of the greatest artists of all time. There are many, many other stories that I have shared over the years, and fans and friends will know. Each one of them still as colourful in my mind now as it was when I first lived them. I thank Michael for those memories, and even though he is gone, it has never felt like a goodbye.

From all of us at “Thriller Live”, we want to Thank everyone who came to see the Show in the West End. We are Grateful that we could keep Michael’s Legacy and Music alive through the production and cá look forward to continuing touring the world in years to come. Now here follows a long, long list of thanks to just a few of the many people who made the show possible in the West End. There has been literally hundreds of people involved on and off the stage, so apologies that I can’t list everyone, but each of you are just as important in making this show a special part of West End history ! Producers Paul Walden & Derek Nicol, Mark Strange – General Manager, Ginette Sinnott – Head of Marketing, and everyone else at Flying Music (past and present) – thank you for believing in the show and all you have done to make it a worldwide success.

•Gary Lloyd our amazing Director & Choreographer. I could write a book about his character and talent, so please go read his own ! John Maher our meticulous Musical Director extraordinaire. • Every single band member past and present including Damien Cooper, Oliver Latka, Ryan Alex Farmery, Adam Kovacs and Mike Bradley - the greatest compliment you can pay these guys, is that some audience members still ask if the show is ‘live’. Yes! Applause when screen goes back and our musicians are revealed ! • Yasmin Yazdi, Jo Dyce, Rose Wild and Aisling Duffy – our fierce Resident Directors and Assistant Choreographers whom over the years have put hundreds of cast members through their paces. • Sharon Speirs and Caroline Stroud, our two long running and outstanding Company Managers over the past 11-years. And thank you to others who stepped in. • Nigel Catmur – Lighting Designer, Chris Whybrow – Sound Designer, Jonathan Park – Set Designer, Rob Jones and Catherine Teatum – Costume Designers – thank you for making this show look and sound so great ! • Our hard-working crew – Dawn Harvey, Paul Bond, Glenn Jenkins, Sophie Kemp, Kelvin White, Bill Dimeo, Matthew Giles, Alice Johson, Sara Markwick, Gemma Tucker, Melissa Cooke, Karli Can Heerden, Inca Jaackson, Rosie Woods and Jo Conlon – thank you for being there every day and making the show possible. • Not forgetting dozens of former crew members from Becky Potts and Jessica Plews to Craig and Kate Garratt and many, many more. • A big shout out to Haydon Eshun and John Moabi, our longest running West End cast members. These two guys are stage legends, whose performances did Michael proud every single night. • Respect to Kevin Wilson PR for keeping our name up in lights and doing it always with the utmost enthusiasm. • Thank you to Debbie O'Brien Casting – the talent we have seen over the years has been incredible including Zoe Birkett, Hayley Evetts, Maria Lawson, Samantha Johnson Carter, Cleopatra Madonna, Britt Quentin, Alex Buchanan, Jerome Singer, Trenyce Cobbins, David Jordan, MiG Ayesa and so many more outstanding vocalists ! • We have also been blessed with hundreds of amazing dancers since 2006 and through to the end of this West End run. They, with the singers and musicians are the life blood of the show, which relies, not on massive production, but pure heart and soul to deliver the energy, authenticity and chemistry that was part of Michael Jackson. • Thank you Nica Burns at Nimax for giving us a home for 11-years, and all the staff at the Lyric Theatre for looking after us, and over 2 million audience members throughout the years. • Massive appreciation to Kerys Nathan, our original Director & Choreographer from 2006-2008. You’ll always be a part of the show. • Thank you to every single cast member from the original West End cast featuring Ben Forster, Roger Wright, Denise Pearson, Ricko Baird, Kieran Alleyne, Layton Williams (OFFICIAL), Sterling Williams, Lewis Davies, Kamilah Beckles, Christabelle Field, Elliot James, Earl Perkins, Emily Rumbles, Dannielle Rothman, Sean Williams, Ashton Russell, Ross Sands and Jordan Darrell, to our last with – Wayne Anthony-Cole, Vivienne Ekwulugo, David Julien, Miles Anthony, Florivaldo Mossi, Lauren Gore, Filippo Coffano, Leslie Garcia Brown, Deavion Brown, David Devyne, Mitchell Eley, Ike Fallon, Eliza Hart, Gabriela Hernandez, Amelia-Annie Layng, Arnold Mabhena, Rishard-Kyro Nelson, Oskarina O'Sullivan , Shola B Riley, Triple Calz, Cannon Hay, Isaiah Mason, Ishaan Raithatha and Messiah Unusudimi. • To everyone on our suspended touring production, and all those before which has seen us visit over 34 different countries, thank you, thank you and thank you again. We will see each other hopefully soon as we continue this journey. Until then stay safe, and don't eat too many pies, there is only one costume budget. •Apologies too many not named above, some whom I greatly admire and some whom I am proud to now call friends, you are all in my thoughts.

Lastly, and most importantly – thank you to MICHAEL JACKSON ! “THRILLER LIVE” is your Music, your Artistry and your Magic ! Thank you for your Inspiration , Love and Humanity . 🙏🏼

Dreams do come true — Adrian Grant .

[slurrmp]

           all you need to know about spyro’s original characters:                                            oc: tanaka matheson                                        fandom: star trek/doctor who                                                  status: semi active.

THE BASICS

Name: tanaka devonne matheson Nicknames: ana, bear, annie Gender: female Pronouns: she/her Sexual Orientation: bisexual Age (actual age): 42 31 Place of Birth: lithgow, new south wales, australia Citizenship: australian/american

                                                  APPEARANCE

Age they appear: early twenties to mid twenties Hair colour: brown Hair style: mostly always either straight down, or in a ponytail. Eye colour: green Birthmarks/scars/marks: two inch scar above her eyebrow, multiple on her shoulders, one across the underside of her belly due to a c-section. burn marks on her lower back and some on the back of her left hand. scar in the centre of her right hand palm. Piercings: ears ( double lobe, helix, auricle ) Tattoos: tiny devil horns on her shoulder blade.

Build (curvy, toned, etc): unusually tall for her family, can seem a little bit lanky, but ana is muscled, was trained to wield a sword and even a gun when she was a teenager. Weight: around 65kilos Height: 5′7″ Clothing style: mainly jeans and a top, never really seen in anything too fancy unless the occasion calls for it. tracky pants and a sweat shirt when lazy around the tardis. mainly comfy clothing, when not in uniform. Overall appearance: always seems like she’s got some place to be. is never seen without sneakers on her feet.

Trinkets/jewelry: a locket that her mother gave her before she died. her father’s dog tags. Equipment/accessories (things they are never without; ex: a backpack or a notepad) baby bag. seems ridiculous but those bags can hold anything and everything in them. talk about the doctor having never ending pockets. when ana brings her baby bag with her, you know there’s important shit in there.

                                          INNER WORKINGS

General mood: ana was raised in a military family, she has her moments were she can be fun and silly, but she is mostly a rather serious person, who wants to make sure that everything is going well. especially when she has her kids. Mental state (any mental illnesses?): ptsd is strong with this one. with her world being plunged into darkness and being separated from her father when she was only 6 years old. then being dragged into another universe and across time. it gets to a person. ana has also suffered from post natal depression. Alignment (neutral good, chaotic evil, etc): chaotic neutral Morals: big family morals. she end up being torn from her family, so she wants to make sure that she always keeps hers safe. Temperament: very much known as the runaway throughout the galaxy. time and space have even heard of her.

Quirks: chews her lower lip. picks at her nails. twirling of her hair (that’s the one that annoys HER the most) Pet peeves: when people separate their families.

Strengths: extremely loyal. patient. kind. strong. Weaknesses: her family. her friends. it’s rather strange how easy it is to manipulate her.

Fears: death. Intelligence: ana never got the chance to even GO to high school. everything that ana knows was learnt through her aunt and uncle. when ana was pulled into another universe, and she managed to get herself settled with jack at torchwood, she applied at the local university (thanks to a couple of faked documents by the doctor) and was able to studied midwifery.

Priorities: her children. Desires: to see the entire universe. all the way to the beginning of time, to the end of it. Likes: engineering. which is strange - she wanted to help people, but just fixing things became a thing for her to do to get her mind off of stressful times. Dislikes: not being with her father anymore, not even being with her family.

Vices: can be too serious at times. always thinking about her family instead of the needs of many others.

                                           RELATIONSHIPS

Friends: significant friendships, the doctor, jack harkness,

Family: Miles Matheson ( FATHER, MIA. ), Tamara Wayne ( MOTHER, DECEASED. ), Taylor Matheson ( TWIN, BROTHER, ALIVE. ),

Significant other: there uh ... there’s been many. but at the moment, there’s none.

Kids: Ethan Matheson ( SON, ALIVE. ), Grace Matheson ( DAUGHTER, ALIVE. ), Lucas Matheson ( SON, ALIVE. ), Leah Matheson ( DAUGHTER, ALIVE. )

Enemies: many of the same enemies as the doctor, they really have a knack for getting her into trouble.

                         EMPLOYMENT AND EDUCATION

Jobs: works for torchwood. star fleet officer. Profession: midwife

Income (if any): it all depends on where she is at the time. at home on earth in the 21st century it’s about 28 000 pounds.

Furthest education: university. Degree (if any): bachelor of medicine (midwifery) cardiff university

                                   EXTRA INFORMATION

Criminal record: there’s just too many to actually add.  

Social media accounts (if any): instagram, snapchat bc snapping the torchwood group while away with the doctor is a lot of fun.

Reputation: ana’s known around the universe as the runaway. it was said that even though she had the skills and the talent to slay her enemies where they stood with her sword, ana would runaway - just like the doctor had taught her. it doesn’t help that in the future Q flaunts her around the galaxy and too star fleet.

Skills: extremely talented with a sword.

Talents: ana can actually play the piano rather well.

Hobbies: no time for hobbies. though - seeing the universe might be considered a hobby.

Special abilities (if any): spending enough time on the tardis weird things might happen.

Transportation: the tardis mostly, but when she’s home in the 21st century ana would use one of the torchwood cars

Living conditions: an apartment in the heart of new orleans. it’s such an obscure place to live, but all of her kids loved the french quarter, it’s basically the base of operations for the matheson clan.

Pets: a black cat called salem and a dalmatian called snoopy.

                                               AESTHETIC

Colors associated with: pastel blue, teal, aqua, a lot of different blues. Their personal aesthetic: the pitch blackness and the smattering of stars when looking out the window. watching the stars zoom past while in warp speed. Song that suits them: KLLER QUEEN - QUEEN

╳ BIO:

there has always been something about tanaka matheson. she had always been a special child. when she was nine years old, three years after the blackout, she left with her aunt rachel, away from her uncle ben and cousins, charlie & danny to find her way back to her father, a general of the monroe militia. she learnt the basic skills to survive, becoming one of the best swordsmen in the entire militia just like her father. she was still too young when she returned to miles to be apart of the army, but that did not stop ana from wanting to learn everything there was to know about swords and how to become an amazing fighter like her daddy.

she learnt more about how to run and fight than simple maths. however, miles made sure that she was well educated when it became obvious she liked to travel with him when he WENT on long tours than to actually learn basic rules - eventually when ana was thirteen (13), miles made sure that ana stayed in school, which sometimes included him taking the men in the middle of the night so that he didn’t wake her and cause her to stowaway in the carriage.

season one of revolution plays out normally - just with the addition of a twenty year old ana being incredibly protective over miles and charlie.

life seemed to be going smoothly until one day she found a crack in the wall of an abandoned hospital they were squatting in. this crack in the wall caused her to fall into another universe. it was a crack in time and space - it should have SWALLOWED her whole and erased her from reality, but instead the crack spat her out on the other side, in a different universe, on a different planet, IN a different time.

she never really thought about the consequences of her absences back on the other side, miles was in hysterics that not even nora could calm him down from - he searched high and low for his daughter, only to come up empty six months down the road. she was considered K.I.A and miles was more ruthless than ever before.

ana had no idea where she ended up or HOW the hell she got there, but it was on that planet that she met a man called the doctor, a girl named amy pond and a woman called river song. they all seemed to know her rather well - it was explained that time travel was a funny thing. from there - she fell into one adventure that felt like it would never end, until abruptly it does. one of the - ALIENS, a weeping angel, snagged her around the wrist - but it didn’t kill her. they had been KILLING PEOPLE all day, snapping necks instead of feeding on their life energy, at least that’s what the doctor told her they did but this ONE - this ONE angel didn’t kill her, instead it shoved her FURTHER into the past. but why this one angel ? no one could really answer this question, not even when ana finally reached the moment in time the long way around. this time instead of landing in a cave on an alien planet, she landed on the lap of one captain jack harkness in world war two, london.

it was from there that she met the doctor again, but this time he looked different - looked older and a girl called rose tyler from there - she was pulled into ANOTHER crazy adventure, but to earth, though the date, they told her was 2005. it hurt ana’s brain to try and wrap around the fact that she wasn’t born yet but she was still her fully grown self. twenty years old and in a different time and universe.

it was from there that ana grew to love the doctor, jack and rose - up until the time the doctor left jack in the year five billion and ended up regenerating, a move that ana figured he was trying to avoid her questioning, all on christmas day (and her birthday) (21). it was something that time lords could do apparently, and it was from there at the beginning of 2006 that ana found herself twenty one years old and alone. not wanting to travel with a newly regenerated doctor, not after leaving jack stranded in the future and the fact they had been butting heads almost the whole time he had been awake. it was only the beginning of february that ana stumbled across torchwood and captain jack again.

this is where ana’s timeline gets a little complicated - ana and jack find themselves getting a little bit closer - a lot close as they become intimate (on multiple occasions) and it’s only a few months later (half way through season one) that ana finds out she’s pregnant. but it’s an event that attracts the wrong kind of attention (madam kavorian had her nose out early on) however, ana runs back into the doctor again, who is suddenly with a new companion after her and jack have an argument one afternoon - he was getting close to ianto, she wasn’t mad that he was, just mad that jack never told her about it. she was four months pregnant and had already been on a ship that was crashing into a sun, in the early 1900′s with a doctor who was human and stuck in 1969 with no TARDIS. it was during the year that never was that ana gave birth to a healthy baby boy, ethan. born july 15th 2007 (22) aboard the valiant.

ana didn’t continue on with the doctor and martha when everything returned to normal and the master had been stopped. she had a baby to look after and a captain that wouldn’t slow down - during the year, they had gotten closer once more - ana forgave jack about keeping lanto a secret and who knew maybe the three of them could work something out (they never did). but it was during the winter of 2010 (23) that ana lost her son. (leaving out the events that occurred during children of earth and miracle day) ana was left alone on earth and that’s when they struck.

the headless monks - the silence and madam kavorian, she wanted to take a child born from an immortal and a human to see if she could transform him into a weapon, see if he had gained some of his father’s powers of immortality - it was the worst night of ana’s life, and the first thing that she did was call the doctor (who had regenerated yet again), crying on her bathroom floor almost throwing up due to the fact that her son had been taken right from under her nose. the floppy haired doctor made a promise that he would find ethan for her - find her son. during events of season six, there’s other shit that involves my time lord oc, oliver plus finding out that there’s a version of herself in this universe, though she was born a boy, called taylor plus another baby, this time a girl (25), season seven is split into two, ana being around during the power of three but not for the ponds last goodbye, she was dealing with family issues at the time.

it was only on ana’s birthday at the end of season seven, just before the doctor regenerates, that the crack in space and time appears again on christmas (the planet), pulling her in - yet again she doesn’t get erased or forgotten. clara seemed to think it was the time lords trying to keep her alive.

landing on the grassy ovel of star fleet academy in 2255 (just turned 26). this kind of anomaly - that seemed to like throwing her throughout time and space - attracted a lot of attention. the continuum caught wind of ana when her appearance in the universe caused a stir in the timeline. this was the moment when she met Q. no stranger to time travel, thanks to the doctor, ana was only worried about the fact that she had no way of getting home - it was then that Q managed to distract her with trying to create a fake background for her which would allow her to join star fleet and end up becoming a member of the USS enterprise, to fight the battle against nero (28) & khan (28) in the next five years.

it was during the short break between khan’s attack and the battle of yorktown that ana was whisked away from that certain timeline - all because Q was bored with how things where going, calm and boring and no fun at all. keeping her backstory and her star fleet academy degree ana was placed on board the USS enterprise yet again, however the year was 2365 (still 28) and this timeline was completely different. run by jean-luc picard, Q introduced ana in a rather horrible way.

it was almost two full years of Q and ana getting each other into trouble, whether it was with the rest of the universe or mostly amongst the enterprise crew, however, during the events of Wolf 359 (30), ana is assimilated along with captain picard. after the event and ana was back to ‘normal’, the continuum decided to throw ana away from Q, who was banned from seeing her and even knowing where she disappeared too.

ana landed on board the NX-01, the very first space bound enterprise.

spending almost exactly three years (33) of her life on board, Q managed to find her after she was almost fatally wounded on one of the away missions, which included a run in with the xindi. Q, who was having his run ins with voyager and her crew at the time, dumped her in the delta quadrant where ana spent the next three years (35) once more on board a ship, where she grew incredibly close to the crew and the captain. the australian certainly had a habit of doing so, even with her rank of lieutenant and being only a nurse.

it was then that she stepped in and demanded to be taken back home, to her time - to the crew she first became close with, the aos crew, to which natasha a lady Q who had felt sympathy for ana’s situation, being the most notorious Q’s plaything and threw her back on board the 1701 during her second year of the five year mission. which leads into star trek beyond and also helps the fact that ana knows the main antagonist of the movie (37).

now this is where it gets complicated once more - ana does manage to find herself back on 21st century earth. but because she had been affected by the time vortex, the continuum and just being a time traveler as well - ana’s body still registers as a healthy 31 year old - while with some help of borg nanites that had to remain in her body, other wise her respiratory system would have shut down and she would have suffocated to death, which helps her to regenerate a lot faster than most humans. season 9 & 10 of doctor who occur.

REST OF BIO TO COME. WILL INCLUDE DS9, SEASON 11 OF DOCTOR WHO & DISCOVERY SEASON 2.

#doctor who #star trek #nbc revolution #doctor who oc #star trek oc #tanaka matheson #* & MEET MY OC'S. #ahhhh finally got around to writing out ana's bio ! #my oldest baby.

[dailytomlinson]

Louis Tomlinson may be one-fifth of one of the biggest boybands in the world, but there's so much more to know about the singer than the fact he was in One Direction. Now that he's getting on with his solo music career - AND just dropped his amazing new single 'Two Of Us', Louis is a major household name across the world.

Here's everything you need to know about Louis Tomlinson:

1) Louis’s middle name is William.

2) Louis Tomlinson was born on Christmas Eve in 1991.

3) Louis is the oldest member of One Direction. He’s 13 months older than second eldest Zayn Malik.

Check out One Direction through the years: View Gallery 11 photos 1 / 11 One Direction © Shutterstock One Direction auditioning on The X Factor One Direction formed on The X Factor in 2010. All five members auditioned as individual contestants and were put together as a group by Simon Cowell.

4) Louis Tomlinson's star sign is Capricorn. Apparently, typical Capricorns live by the motto, ‘Slow, steady and win the race.’

5) Louis was brought up in Doncaster, South Yorkshire. Other famous people who hail from the town include Jeremy Clarkson, Kevin Keegan and Brian Blessed!

Jeremy Clarkson JEREMY CLARKSON AND BRIAN BLESSED © SHUTTERSTOCK 6) Louis once said that he is a big fan of girls who eat carrots!

7) If Louis had a superpower, he would be able to fly.

8) Louis’s favourite band is The Fray.

9) Louis’s favourite song of all time is ‘Look After You’ by The Fray.

10) Louis’s celebrity crush is Natalie Portman and his man crush is Robbie Williams - who he recently sat next to on The X Factor judging panel.

11) He also once said that Robbie is his biggest role model, telling Metro Radio "I’ve got a massive musical icon and that’s Robbie Williams. We actually got to sing with him on The X Factor and it was absolutely amazing."

X Factor ROBBIE WILLIAMS, AYDA FIELD, LOUIS TOMLINSON AND SIMON COWELL © SHUTTERSTOCK 12) Louis has approximately 1 minute and 30 seconds of solos on ‘Up All Night’ – the second least behind Niall Horan.

13) Louis auditioned on The X Factor by singing a version of Plain White T’s ‘Hey There Delilah’. He got a clean sweep of yeses from the judges.

14) Louis's parents are Johannah Deakin and Troy Austin. They split up when Louis was young, and he eventually took on his stepfather Mark Tomlinson’s surname. Johannah sadly passed away in 2016, Louis paid tribute to his mum on the anniversary of her passing.

15) Louis has five younger half-sisters - one on his father's side (Georgia), and four on his mother's side (Charlotte, Félicité, and twins Daisy and Phoebe).

16) When he was just 11-years-old, Louis had a role as an extra on ITV drama_**_ Fat Friends. His newborn sisters Daisy and Phoebe starred as babies on the show.

17) Spurred on by his appearance on Fat Friends, Louis attended acting school in his spare time and eventually had small parts in 2006 ITV drama If I Had You! and Waterloo Road.

18) When he first auditioned for The X Factor, Louis was a sixth form student at Hall Cross School in Doncaster.

19) Louis also attended The Hayfield School in Doncaster, but dropped out when he failed his first year of A-levels.

20) Louis had a number of part-time jobs before The X Factor, including working at a local cinema and as a hospitality waiter at Doncaster Rovers Football Club.

21) As a student, Louis played the lead role of Danny Zuko in a high school production of Grease. He says playing the part gave him the confidence to audition for The X Factor.

22) When he was younger, Louis wanted to work on a farm.

23) Louis would love to copy Michael Jackson and have a pet monkey. He said, "I'd like to adopt a chimpanzee and build an eternal friendship, that would be amazing."

24) Louis’s favourite colour is dark red.

25) Louis is a big fan of Las Vegas rockers The Killers. After seeing them perform at V Festival, he tweeted, "Watching Mr Brightside live last night was unbelievable. LOVED The Killers!!"

Louis Tomlinson ✔ @Louis_Tomlinson Watching Mr Brightside live last night was unbelievable. LOVED The Killers !!

22.8K 6:09 PM - Aug 20, 2012 Twitter Ads info and privacy 30.4K people are talking about this 26) Louis suffers from a ringing noise in his right ear. Although yet to be officially diagnosed it’s thought it could be tinnitus which can lead to deafness if untreated. He once said, "I am going slightly deaf in my right ear. It’s tinnitus, something like that," before joking that it was because of screaming fans.

27) According to his bandmates, Louis has the smelliest feet in One Direction! Niall once said, "Louis wears plimsolls with no socks so his feet get very sweaty and the sweat is captured. If we are on a bus or something and he takes them off we all pretty much start gagging."

28) Louis was given a telling off by police when filming the ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ video Los Angeles in July 2011 for his erratic driving. Afterwards, he explained, "I got pulled over by the US police. They thought I was all over the place. The officer goes, 'Listen, man, I can shut this thing down if you carry on driving like this. You're driving like a maniac.' And I was like, 'Man, put the gun down. I don't want no trouble.'"

WATCH: One Direction - What Makes You Beautiful (Official Video)

29) Louis says that he and his 1D bandmates are like brothers. Admitting that they occasionally bicker, Louis told Digital Spy, "Because we're around each other so often it's like arguing with your siblings. You fall out with them, go away and have a bit of a paddy, then come back and get over it."

30) Just like Zayn and Harry Styles, Louis supports Manchester United Football Club.

31) Louis’s favourite track on ‘Up All Night’ is the Ed Sheeran-penned track ‘Moments’. The track appears on the deluxe version of the record.

32) If Louis could give anyone a tip when auditioning for The X Factor it would be "just be yourself and really try and get your personality through in your song choice and interview."

33) Louis once owned a Porsche Boxster and sold it on eBay in 2012 for £30,000.

34) When Zayn’s ex-girlfriend Rebecca Ferguson took to Twitter to complain about being overworked by her management, Louis had very little sympathy! He wrote in a now-deleted tweet, '@RebeccaFMusic Success is impossible without proper hard work.'

Rebecca Ferguson REBECCA FERGUSON © SHUTTERSTOCK 35) Louis loves to party! He once told TOTP magazine, "To be honest, I’m sure the majority of 20-year-olds go out and party. I’m not going to feel oppressed."

36) Louis is a giver and not a taker. In fact, there’s nothing he enjoys more than giving his friends and family presents. His late mum Johannah once told Sugarscape, "He’s not a materialistic person himself, but he likes to give people things. He spoils me and the girls and he's happiest doing that."

37) Louis once said that he likes snuggling up in bed with one of the One Directioners... HARRY! He said, "A few weeks ago I made a cup of tea, then went and got in bed with Harry and we watched a show called something like The Top 50 Boybands Of All Time." Nice!

38) Apparently, Louis has revealed that his least favourite food is baked beans.

39) Louis once said his favourite country is France.

40) Louis is an avid fan of surfing. In fact, he loves the beach so much he says he’d like to get married on one.

41) It takes over 30 minutes for Louis to get his hair ready in the morning.

42) Louis admits he’s a really bad cook. Despite this, he appeared alongside Harry in a cooking segment on This Morning in September 2011.

Louis Tomlinson HARRY AND LOUIS WITH THIS MORNING PRESENTER RUTH LANGSFORD IN 2011 © 

43) One of Louis's favourite mottos is, "Live life for the moment because everything else is uncertain."

44) The two traits Louis looks for in a girl are confidence and a good sense of humour.

45) In 2011, his mum Johannah and stepdad Mark split up. Speaking about his mum, Louis said, "It must be so much harder for her because I’m living this fantastic life and being so busy every day whereas she’s still in the old life I was in but without me... It must be really difficult for her not to get upset."

46) Louis’s pet hate is when people chew their food too loudly.

47) Louis has size 10 feet.

48) A man who works in the music industry once tried to have a snog with Louis! "It was a press guy.... he just started going in for a kiss!" said Louis.

49) Louis loves Marmite and has big dollops of it on his toast.

50) Louis admits that he’s a messy person. In fact, he hasn’t met anyone who’s messier than him!

51) Louis is pretty decent on the piano and he loves to play ‘Mr Brightside’ by The Killers.

52) Louis says he’ll "never get used to" the adoration he receives from fans. He once said, "At the end of the day we’re doing something that we really love and to be appreciated for that is really nice."

53) Louis’s favourite TV shows are Misfits and One Tree Hill.

54) If Louis wasn’t a multi-million selling pop megastar, he reckons he’d be training to be a drama teacher.

55) If Louis could visit any planet it would be... Narnia. Erm, it’s a fictional place Louis!!

56) Louis hates rumours, especially when they involve Harry and himself. In a Tumblr interview he explained, "Me and Harry are best friends, people look into our every move. It is actually affecting the way me and Harry are in public, We want to joke around but there seems to be a different rumour every time we do anything."

Louis Tomlinson LOUIS AND HARRY SINGING TOGETHER IN 2015 

57) Louis is prone to sleepwalking and once tried to get into Niall’s bed!

58) Louis once said that if a movie was made about his life, he’d like Leonardo DiCaprio to play him.

59) The first time Louis ever spoke to Harry was in the toilet at The X Factor auditions in Manchester.

60) Louis is a big fan of silly string! He’s sprayed it on stage at gigs, press conferences and even at a security guard who refused to let him speak to fans.

61) When he was 14, Louis played lead guitar in a band called The Rogue with his schoolmates.

62) When One Direction formed, Louis’s big ambition was to go "straight to the top." Proof that dreams come true!

63) In August 2012, Tulisa prank called Louis during a live webchat. When Louis answered she spoke to him in a Donald Duck voice in front of thousands of viewers. The N-Dubz star tweeted afterwards, 'soz babe we had 2 get ya! Thanks 4 being a laugh n entertaining us!'

Tulisa ✔ @officialtulisa @Louis_Tomlinson soz babe we had 2 get ya! Thanks 4 being a laugh n entertaining us!

266 8:23 PM - Aug 5, 2012 Twitter Ads info and privacy 579 people are talking about this 64) Louis was fined £80 for speeding on the way to V Festival in 2012. It’s reported that he was going 48mph in a 40mph zone. He’ll also get three points on his licence. Ouch!

65) Despite having smelly feet, Louis is a big fan of shoes! His favourite types are chinos and Toms.

66) Another of his favourite mottos is "live fast, have fun & be a bit mischievous."

67) If Louis was Simon Cowell for the day, he says he’d go on a date with Susan Boyle.

After his successful stint on last year's The X Factor, Louis delighted his fans in March when he dropped his amazing new single 'Two Of Us'.

The song, which is adored by fans, is a tribute to Louis' late mum Johannah Deakin. Johannah left behind seven children, including Louis, at the end of 2016, when she lost her battle with an aggressive form of leukaemia at the age of just 42.

Louis' track 'Two Of Us' features the lyrics, "I know you'll be looking down, swear I'm gonna make you proud. I'll be living one life for the two of us."

The article was followed by a tweet:

#tow of us #two of us promo #louis tomlinson #harry styles #070319 #metro #press

[littlewomenpodcast]

Book Jo´s feminine qualities (that many like to ignore)

Niina: Somebody commented on my Instagram that there are a lot of people who say that they are like Jo, but then they are actually not at all like the book Jo, because the book Jo, there are some boyish things that she likes but then she also likes to be a mother and she loves all boys, she wants to start a school for boys and then she also likes to knit and make clothes and she likes to read romance novels and she cries when she reads them. She adores her niece and her nephew and she loves Friedrich´s nephews. She has some very feminine qualities.

Christina: When you say that it reminded me.. I made it a while ago but it sticks with me. I said something like If Jo was present in the modern day and this is again because I was..very cringeworthy but I was also this girl too..Like 2006-2008-2012 time when the girls were just like "I am not like other girls" and they made it seem like, if you like the color pink or if you are like this, if you like make-up, you like wearing dresses, was almost like a negative quality and I think Jo would have been that type of girl in the beginning of the novel. She would have been that "I am not like the other girls-girl" and what makes her relatable at least to me is that throughout the book she realizes there is nothing really wrong with liking those things, that is why I say she learned to understand herself better. I can have some of the more stereotypical boyish qualities and still like the girly things but someone ...it sticks with me forever, they replied saying "You are an idiot" and then they per-ceded to block me. They didn´t want me just long enough for me to see it and I was like "let me check that again" they blocked me and I wasn´t like saying that "oh Jo was a terrible person. No I am saying that she is a flawed person and that is how her character grows. She grows from being "I don´t care" "girls are stupid" "boys don´t have any drama" to be like there are nice things about being a girl and there is nothing wrong with that. It is amazing how some people just say that love Jo or know Jo and then say stuff like that I believe, maybe you have seen it someone had like favorite literally character Jo March - and then said something like "oh then they gave up their independence to marry that old professor" and I´m like first of all, you don´t know the book, if you´d knew the book you would have seen how that went down and I don´t think you really care about the character as much to say or to make a claim that Jo gave up her independence. She is not that great of a character because she did that in marrying a man that loved and supported her and honestly I think as "unromantic" as they are they probably have one of the most romantic proposal scenes I have ever seen in book or a movie. (laughter) Niina: That´s true :D Christina: It is amazing how some people just they think they have an idea of a character and I almost sometimes think "that´s so Laurie of you". You have this perceived image of what Jo is and what you want Jo to be when the truth is Jo is not like that. You just want her to be that way and it happens to be most of the time the Jo and Laurie shippers that have that sort of delusional idea of who Jo is supposed to be. Niina: I think the whole idea of "not being like the other girls" it comes from very deep misogyny. This idea that you are better than fellow women. It is a form of misogyny and it was a trend some time ago. Hopefully not so much these days. I think one of the problems with Jo especially when she was younger was that she identified so much with the masculine that she became very misogynistic and you can see that when she makes fun of Meg wanting to go to a ball or Amy trying to impress her female friends but then she grows out of that and I think a lot of that has to do with her and Laurie´s friendship. Not fading but she is growing out of it. Laurie has some great qualities but he sort of embodies that 19th century typical young man, the way they behaved. Jo got some really bad influences from him and he from her and I think she kind of tries to block her emotions sometimes because she feels that if people see her showing emotions, then people are going to see her weaker and when people see her more weaker, she is more feminine to them. She also grows out of that as well. Christina: That is why I think it is even more moving to see her character development because she goes from someone who is being so closed off "No this is not tears -I just got something in my eyes" type of person to be open to take advice from people or open to criticism or open to wanting to grow because I think it is very much cycling thing when you are told just hold it in because it is going to be seen as weak and in some way I was a very sensitive person but I was always told that in a very negative light so I was like alright you know what I am just trying to hold it in and that was not healthy at all and it was almost seen in away kind of very feminine thing "oh you know she is just an emotional little thing, poor thing". In some cases I was right, what they said was very rude or mean but boys will be boys and you are just being too emotional over it. Having Jo learn how to be more open and accepting and to have a positive influence like her mom and Friedrich, just to name a few, that just. It´s okay, there is nothing wrong being vulnerable. It doesn´t mean that you are weak, it just means that you are open to having other people help you and sometimes that´s the hardest thing is to admit to say that I need help or this is bothering me or I don´t know what to do because if you are that person who is like "yeah sure I know what you´re doing, yeah I totally know that and you don´t" that can cause a lot more problems. For me I had to sort of unlearn that behavior because it didn´t help me in the slightest. Now I live by the motto "If I don´t know it, I´ll ask for help"I admit that I am being "an idiot" rather than make myself look even more of an idiot than pretending that I know what I am doing. Niina: Yeah and I think it is a very long process for Jo to unlearn those habits. In Little Men, there is Nat´s character. She calls him "girly" and she sees him weaker than the other boys because he is so sensitive, and he has similarities with Laurie. It is not that Friedrich is not sensitive. He is not as sensitive as Laurie is.. how would I put it..he is a lot more grounded, when Laurie is very idealistic, head in the clouds. Christina: I guess if I had to think of it, Laurie is who I was when I was in school. Where I just took everything and made it full blown as now I am more like Friedrich, where it´s like "that hurts but let´s try to see what is the best way to respond to that very sensitive moment". Niina: It is a much more mature response. You try not to take everything too emotionally or too personally. Laurie was like that and I think to some extend Jo was like that when she was younger.

#little women #jo march #femininity

[oveliagirlhaditright]

A comment I just left on ProdigyXD’s awesome video about Kairi needing her own game:

Thank you so much for this video, Prodigy. To be honest, I didn't watch your other KHIII Kairi video... After KHIII, and all of the hate that Kairi got from fans there... as someone who loves Kairi, I've been very selective of the videos I watch. I just- I've been with this series from the beginning. I went through the horrible Kairi hate years of 2005-2006, and while I dealt with it all there... I just don't want to go through it again at this point in my life. I'm not saying that some of the criticisms people have aren't valid, of course. God, no! I'll be the first knocking down Nomura's door, telling him he honestly hasn't treated Kairi the best and begging him to get better with her. But I just don't want to see art of Sora and Riku murdering Kairi anymore. I don't. I'm not saying it's gotten that bad again (I actually don't know if it has or not. God, I hope not). And I'm not saying that that's what I thought your first video was... but do you maybe get with all of this why I was reluctant to watch your first one, not for sure knowing what kind of video it would be? But, ANYWAY. Seeing the title/screenshot of this video "Why Kairi Needs Her Own Game", I went "Cool. I've wanted that for years. I'll check this out". And I'm so glad I did! What a wonderful thing this is, that really hammers out all the fine points and is fair to both sides. And you going and counting all her hours of screentime in the main games is you going above and beyond the call of duty. Major kudos. Kairi is probably my favorite character of all time, because KH is my favorite series of all time... And that's weird, I know. Since Kairi isn't utilized as well as she could be, you'd think I'd prefer someone else. But I think I was always destined to side with Sora, Riku, or Kairi, since those are the main three we start out with. And I'm someone who always has their heart with the firsts. And Sora (who-from a writing standpoint in I and III-is probably my favorite, but shh) just always seemed... too perfect to me. I don't mean that in a way to slight him or his writing. But that I wanted a character I could somewhat relate to, you know? And I just never thought I could reach the standard of Sora. And Riku... Well, I hated him in the first game so he was out. LOL (I was a nine-year-old who saw the first game in black and white, and despised him for trying to hurt my Disney characters.). And while I've grown to love him now, of course-and think his arc in the series is probably the best-the rule of firsts for me made me prefer Kairi over him (that, and because I just genuinely like more upbeat protagonists). But it isn't just through process of elimination that made Kairi my favorite. Not at all. I've always really loved and respected Kairi for who she is... the things she's done, and her potential. Kairi was actually a role model for me, growing up. Because many forget (or just don't know, if they came into the series later), that Kairi was created when the Disney princesses at the time... weren't the greatest. And in a lot of ways, I saw Kairi as better than them: Just her take charge attitude with the boys as they built the raft... the fact that she wanted to go on this adventure to see other worlds WITH them (in a lot of media back then, the girl would have been left out of that dream)... and how Kairi-even while unable to defend herself, sure-was still selfless and wasn't content to just be saved, but would then want to try and help rescue Sora and Riku... was some powerful stuff back then. And her sass. That might be my FAVORITE Kairi trait (which is why I'm sad it's a bit watered down in KHIII. It's still there, it is, but not nearly as much as it was in KHI and KHII): In a time, where a lot of the Disney princesses could be best described as "nice". Having a character who did things like slapping Sora upside the head and calling him a "lazy bum", saying Sora was "completely hopeless" without her and Riku, insisting that Axel wasn't "being very friendly" when he tries to kidnap her (after he just said he thought he and Kairi were friends already) meant a lot to me (this is also how friends behave with each other, and why I bought the Destiny Trio's friendship more than the Wayfinder Trio's). I also think it shows Kairi isn't perfect, and why I see the arguments that she has no personality or is a Mary-Sue as unfounded. Plus... just the fact that the girl with a heart of pure light is one of the most snarky characters in the series is an amazing dichotomy to me, that a lot could be done with. And don't even get me STARTED on this girl's potential, and all the plot threads that have for some reason been left untied with her (I'm also irritated that it seems like, for example, KHIV is going to deal with experiments done on Skuld in the basement of Radiant Garden's castle. Instead of first doing it with the main girl, Kairi-and filling that story in-when the novels say Apprentice Xehanort experimented on her before throwing her into space. Why can't we see this crap? Why?). I might make another comment with all of her potential and whatnot (because I've had YEARS to think about all of this. Especially when the cast was small, so I then thought more would be done with Kairi). And just the fact that Nomura has yet to really do anything with it... just saddens me to no end. I have my own suspicions about that: I think he has trouble with writing female characters in general, and is even somewhat afraid to. But most of all... I don't think he knows how to write someone who's supposed to have a heart of pure light (not even Ven counts, since he has half a heart). Especially a girl one. So I think he leaves her out for that reason, instead of risk botching her... And I wish he'd just realize that I think he already answered his own question long ago, and to just go on ahead wit it: That just because she has a heart of pure light, doesn't mean she can't feel emotions that can be associated with darkness in this series... but rather, that it just-for whatever reason-won't turn to darkness for her like it would with anyone else. Because we've for sure already seen her and the other Princesses experience despair, anger, ambition, or what have you. But, yeah: It's really sad what's happened with Kairi (just think about the fact that the only worlds Kairi has been to are Destiny Islands, Hollow Bastion, Traverse Town, the End of the World, Twilight Town, The World That Never Was, The Mysterious Tower, Merlin's Time Chamber, an The Keyblade Graveyard, when she started this series wanting to go on a grand world tour, too. Why does only SHE get just the traumatizing worlds, and none really with Disney and Disney fun?). And I hope and pray that Nomura fixes it with IV (or whatever game), by having Kairi feel guilty about everything that's happened with Sora, get stronger, and save Sora (or at least be a key part to it), because as much as I hate to say it... If he doesn't, there may never be any going back for this character:( I don't know why he did what he did to her in III: if it was to subvert expectations (we all thought Kairi's warrior story would finally have its pay-off, so he decided to go against that idea to surprise us? Nomura has said he tries to surprise himself. And I don think one of his faults as a writer, is that he bends over backwards to try and make these crazy twists happen when he should just write the story and have them come naturally), to do a tragic romance (which surely it is. But still... there were other ways. And I don't know if the way this has now damaged Kairi was worth it. Maybe this is why Nomura's been quoted saying he doesn't think he writes romance well...), or what. ...I also will say that Nomura has a problem with fridging female characters that is pretty worrying, and should maybe be addressed: Aerith in FFVII was HIS idea, Luna in Final Fantasy XV was probably him (since she's essentially rewritten Stella. And Stella was his. And oh, how I worry for Verum Rex girl now, for these reasons), Strelitzia, and now Kairi. So, I REALLY hope Nomura didn't just think undermining everything Kairi was worth it to just give Sora man-pain... but I'm worried it was. -sigh- Like I said above... I do hope Nomura has some master plan with this and that it's all going somewhere. And that at the end of the day, this will be the start of a good payoff for Kairi: And in a few years, her KHIII performance won't even be a blip on the radar. We've fallen down so low, we can only go up at this point (and since Kairi has now been killed to be used against Sora, it can never happen again. So that's a plus). But at the same time... I do think it's best that us as a community-kindly, of course-let our voices be heard about this, so hopefully it will get back to Square Enix... and they'll realize we want a Kairi game (or whatever), and will give the fans what they want and make it, and fix some of these issues. And I thank you for, perhaps, starting some of that here:)

[kapitan5o]

no offense, but why do you like naruto? i heard it is disgustingly sexist; the only main female character is super over-sexualized and is only a plot point for the male characters. also it's homophobic; there was an intimate scene between two male characters in the comics that was removed from the series. so, what did you see in it? i respect you and look up to you but i admit i'm a little confused about this 😕

Okay, dude, I think you missed some key points: “used to like” and “when I was 12”. But I find your accusations pretty unfair and here is why (it’s gonna be a very long one because there is a lot to untangle in your question and I honestly don’t recommend this read to anyone except this anon):

let’s make some things clear first: naruto has at least 20 main female characters because it is a manga with more than 700 chapters, the first of which started being published in 1997 which explains a lot of issues people might have with it like not enough representation (people are still struggling with this today 20 years later even with much newer shows). So I’m just here to tell you that there is not one main female character, there are a bunch, they’re all different, they’re all ninjas just like male characters and some are much stronger too and some of them also have high leadership roles (which we don’t even have enough in real life to this day, amazing I know). Is there sexism in naruto? Yes, much like in every other anime i’ve ever watched. In fact, much like in almost everything I’ve ever watched? With anime and manga specifically though there are some types of characters and tropes that are almost traditional to japanese culture and they can be seen as absolutely unacceptable for a westerner reader/viewer especially now (things were different in early 2000s) but you really can’t blame naruto for having one over-sexualized female character from what “you’ve heard” since this sexualization you’re talking about comes from the fandom not the original manga so for instance if you look up “female naruto characters” you’ll get “ToP 1o hOtTEst NAruTo CHARacTeRs” with “hot” or inappropriate fanart instead of a list of strong female characters that would highlight their strengths and actual ninja powers - so can��t really blame the original manga for that either. Bare in mind that the genre of naruto is shonen which is focused on action, adventure, friendship and fighting so there is no place for sexualization. Are some female characters still written poorly? Yes, but I could blame the entire Hollywood for that as well as this one manga artist.

- here is that main female character you’re referring to in the original manga: dressed like a normal human, fighting, shouting, doing her ninja stuff (oh and her special ninja power? super strength, i know, very over-sexualized)

Now onto the “intimate scene between two male characters that was in the manga but was removed from the cartoon” - the only scene you could be referring to was actually an illusion created by one of the other characters (he has the power to create illusions or clones from thin air and he did so for two other male characters) - was this actual gay representation to begin with? No. Was it an actual intimate scene between two male characters? No. Is it a double standard that the cartoon still included female characters in the same illusion/clone technique but didn’t include a scene that would be considered gay? Yes. Is it homophobic? In the manga it was purely a “fan service” situation, maybe even a slight mockery of yaoi fans, but why the producers of the actual anime decided not to include it is beyond me - it is probably for the same reasons voltron producers only hinted to a gay relationship and never actually shown anything animated between two male characters, like a kiss. Seeing how in naruto unlike voltron it wasn’t even meant to be actual representation I don’t personally consider this homophobic.

And now onto your question - how could I possibly like something that had sexist elements in it in 2006 when I was 12? I’ll tell you how and bare in mind kids at 12 now are nothing like when I was 12 - we had little to no access to the internet but we had one huge computer that took an hour to turn on and 2 hours to load a 12 minute video on youtube and you guessed it, there was not a lot to watch, but we did find clips of naruto here and there and we put them on to load before school and then we came back and watched them and it was like our second anime ever and it was exciting. Here are the things I liked about naruto as a 12 year old (and I’m talking about the earlier seasons where they’re all kids because that’s all I watched) - the main character is an orphan boy who is different from everyone and desperately wants to have friends and prove his ninja skills to the entire village, everyone thinks he’s annoying and too loud and stupid but episode after episode he proves to be the kindest kid who wants to protect the people in his life because he doesn’t have any family (so his teachers who take care of him and his group that he studies ninja stuff with) there are loads of characters who grow and become friends along the way while competing against each other in ninja exams all with different special powers and there is adventure and missions and really bad comdey - so all your accusations seem a bit like you’ve never watched or read any of the manga or anime yourself but you still have an opinion that you want to embark on my childhood memories of this cartoon? And don’t get me wrong, I’m sure it has issues (especially further along the way) and it is problematic in more than one way but I used to like it when I was 12, so more than ten years ago, my whole entire view on life changed since then and I can now see sexism and homophobia and plain “wrong” when I didn’t used to before because (spoiler alert) I was an actual child? And as a society we’ve become much more aware of it?

Could I watch naruto now and still like it? No. In fact I find most anime really problematic this way or the other which is why I honestly can’t watch it anymore (much like I see sexism in korean dramas which always makes me cringe). So I understand where your concern is coming from but I don’t appreciate when people come with an opinion they heard somewhere (and haven’t really formed themselves) and don’t really know the details of any of it?

If you still have any other concerns or questions I wouldn’t mind talking about them in dms instead of spamming everyone’s feed with naruto related novels when you’re on anon.

#i need a hiatus from social media i think #please guys form your own opinions on things #never knew i'd spend half of my day trying to defend naruto #especially to someone who hasn't even seen/read any of it #especially when i'm 24 #i did some freaking research for you #why do i even bother

[princettegil]

How A Stolen Book Changed My Life

(Also known as "Dragon Knights Saved My Life") It started on a day somewhere between late 2006 and very early 2007. I was 16 and in high school and convinced my parents to stop by the library in town instead of the one nearest my house. I was looking for some manga and I knew they had some. It was a paltry little offering, just a handful of volumes in a short shelf. A few random Yugioh volumes, some Dragon Ball Z, a few stray volumes of Naruto. Nothing caught my eye in particular so I decided to just pick at random. I grabbed a volume of Yugioh, another of some shoujo dream something or other and 2 volumes of a manga called Dragon Knights, volumes 22 and 23 respectively, the only ones they had. I recall flipping through the pages trying to determine which held more interest as I sat in the car while my family went into Walmart to do a little shopping. I don't recall much about the shoujo dream manga except that it had 'dream’ somewhere in the title and the Yugioh volume was just something to flip through to compare to the anime I had already seen. I had high hopes for that shoujo manga but it sadly disappointed (didn't help that it was volume 2 and I'd never even read volume 1.) So I read through character profiles and 'the story thus far’ in the Dragon Knights manga, having a hard time fitting faces from the older volumes artwork in the profiles with the newer style artwork in the books I had. It was going to be a 26 volume series and I had borrowed volumes 22 and 23 having never heard of nor read the earlier books. I was at a loss to the storyline even with the summary in the front of the book, none of the “main” characters seemed to be around much in these 2 books. But one caught my eye, a character named Gil. As it turns out I just happened upon 2 of the 4 books of the entire 26 volume series that focuses on this character! And I had no idea how that happenstance would change my life. Needless to say I fell in love with this character. I began to draw him, make up stories in my head with him, want to know more about him (ahh the trouble of loving a side character in a little known series!), read fanfiction about him. I wound up finding every Dragon Knights related website and forum I could searching for more information. I was obsessed. I tried my best to get my hands on the other volumes he featured in first before eventually trying to collect the entire series. I fell fast and I fell hard. This was my new favorite character, my new obsession to draw and trace and print and read and write and search about. I wanted any and everything Gil! But these were library books, they had to be returned in 2 weeks. But… I couldn't give them up now! Not when I had fell in love! There were no bookstores where I lived. My parents didn't have a credit card to order books online. The library was my only connection! I had never stolen anything in my life. I loved libraries! I knew how frustrating it was to want a book that someone borrowed from the library but never returned! But… this felt like fate! This was my soulmate made from ink! And so… I didn't return them. I kept them. Marked out the barcodes with Sharpies to match the book covers. Since I was the one who always checked the mail on my way home, I destroyed every letter from the library about fines so my parents would never know. I stayed nervous that they would still find out somehow though. That they'd be mad that I'd stole and that they'd have to pay hefty fines. Within two years though, another letter from the library arrived. My gut sunk with fear. They were going to get me now and lock me up in library thief jail! But instead the letter mentioned National Library Week and came with an amazing note: in celebration they had decided to forgive my fines. I was free! $50 in fines was something I no longer had to worry about! The books were mine and my parents would owe nothing for them or my sin! But the fire Gil sparked in me rose still, being an artist type this eventually led me to DeviantArt and posting a bit of my art and finding others fanart of my beloved Gil. I went onto a Dragon Knights forum and a Dragon Knights guild on Gaia Online. I was too shy and new to the series to speak up much but I remembered some of the recurring usernames from site to site. Time passed, I graduated, I moved to DC, started art school, wound up broke, lonely, depressed and severely in debt, I moved back to KY, I started community college, I used my tuition grant money to finally get internet at my home. I eventually caved and followed a few of my friends in joining Tumblr. I went there cause my friends had (for the time) abandoned to their Facebook's to congregrate on this new site and because my newest obsession, Magi, had lots of dedicated blogs and information located there. So I joined and then realized one of the recent Dragon Knights 'sites’ I had been following was actually a Tumblr blog! So I quickly followed it as my steadfast Gil obsession had never really lulled. Some more time passed and I graduated college and moved a few hours away to start my first real job. It was then that things went horrifically, wonderfully, horribly, wrong and so, so right! I started having anxiety attacks and a fellow member of the Dragon Knights (and Gil) fandom whose name I remembered over all those years had started messaging me right about the same time. This person's elder sibling had gone through similar things and so they were the first to reach out a helping hand and understanding heart full of advice and comraderie. And they continued to reach out. We became friends. I became friends with a few other Dragon Knights peeps as well. And then I fell in love with this helpful fellow fan. And then things went to hell. I started to become increasingly depressed, having more and more anxiety attacks. I began to self harm for the first time. I constantly planned out my own suicide. Through all of this, my new internet friend was there. Sometimes my episodes were because of him. I was new to the feelings of love and jealousy and obsession (with real people at least) and the hurt that comes with living alone, with not knowing where you fit in the world, with not knowing how you fit in this other person's life and what to do with all these new overwhelming feelings while also trying to find a new job and pay the bills and prove I could do this thing on my own. My emotions were a swirling rollercoaster ride from Hell but somehow, some way, he rode through them with me. He rode through them with cute little drawings of Gil, and fun games to distract me from my pain, comforting words, and plans to meet at a large anime con. We met. I was still in love but he was not. It hurt to be turned down but his presence was something I still loved having in my life. It was something that, through all the emotions and hurt and blood and suicide attempts, was still somehow there. He rode the rollercoaster hell ride with me and was still with me at the ending gates. I wound up moving back home, getting counseling, getting meds, and slowly working on getting back on my feet. I went through a few more jobs shakily. But I learned how to reach out when I needed too. Learned that boundaries were not a thing to be feared. That I was not alone. That there were people who cared about me. That I was not a monster. I went through a lot those few years. My sexuality changed again and again and even my gender changed in the end. (I still credit the friend I made via love of the Dragon Knights series on helping me through all that as well.) And now, here I am. 28 years old. Now identifying as transmale, pan-romantic and somewhere between asexual and demi-sexual ( as far as I know of at this moment.) I still have the occasional anxiety attack. There's still a scampering from the brain raccoons and all that the mischief they bring every now and again (from paranoia to depression and overthinking and dissociation.) But for the most part I've come to realize that I've grown a lot. I've changed a lot. I actually like most of how I am now. I'm happier. I'm more accepting of myself. I'm still hopelessly in love. And… I'm alive. You see, during that year I was on my own I tried to kill myself no less than 3 times and scarred my arms many, many times more than that. But I'm alive still. And through it all the person I thank most of all for that, the person who taught me how to breath, the person who unknowingly stole my heart, the person who showered me with art of our beloved Gil, the person who literally SAVED ME from myself - I met because I stole a couple books from a library over 10 years ago. A lifetime obsession, inspiration for art and stories and character building, a breath of life into discovering myself and who I am, a love that's still as deep now as it began, a friendship I thank the gods for every day, a true lifesaver in ever sense of the word, and even the namesake for my gender transition journey - ALL OF THIS AND MORE because I stole a couple of books from a library when I was a wee nerd.

#Dragon Knights #dorakishi #dragon kishidan #mineko ohkami #tw: self harm #tw: suicide #srsly this series this fandom changed my life and I am forever thankful #gil