#but honestly I’ve just been trying to get a frame to understand Jenny. she’s not like ted and she’s not like Vicky. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

georgefancys · 4 years

Text

police violence and propaganda in ITV’s Endeavour

“That’s not what my dad says... he says you’re all bastards.” - Tommy Cork, Endeavour, ‘Neverland’.

- first of all, I’m white, so if any black people or other poc want to weigh in, please please do. this isn’t going to be a post about race specifically (mostly because there’s barely anything to talk about, Russell Lewis loves him some white characters) but obviously since a hugely disproportionate amount of police violence in real life is towards black people, that has to be a part of the conversation.

- second of all, all cops are bastards. yes, in the uk too.

- it’s not like i’ve seen anyone in the fandom defending fictional police officers or anything (unlike, say, some people in the brooklyn 99 fandom), so this isn’t a response to anything i’ve seen, but if we’re all going to be stanning a cop show i think this needs to be addressed.

- i’m not any kind of expert, i’m just taking information i’ve learnt elsewhere and applying it to Endeavour.

- i’m very willing to debate on stuff, but read the whole post before you do.

Police corruption

so, the overarching plot in Endeavour, from the pilot to the season 6 finale, is police corruption. However, the corrupting influence is not the police force itself. Instead, it’s the Freemasons, a “secret” society. All the corrupt police officers in Endeavour, from ACC Deare to DS Chard to DS Lott are either Masons themselves, have Masonic connections, or are being bribed/blackmailed by Masons. The point of the corruption plotline is that the police are not corrupt themselves, it’s an external influence that is causing the police force problems. Our main characters are the good police officers!! They hate corruption!!

Fred Thursday

Fred Thursday is a narrative foil for Morse. His family life is a reflection of what Morse doesn’t have. This is a large part of season 1, mostly in Fugue and Home. However, he also does morally ambiguous things that Morse doesn’t agree with. For example, in the season 1 episode Rocket, Thursday is xenophobic towards a German engineer, which Morse is vocal about disagreeing with. We the viewers aren’t supposed to agree with Thursday about this, but there’s never a point where Thursday goes ‘oh yeah I probably shouldn’t hate this German dude who obviously isn’t a nazi’. He keeps his views, and this is never addressed again.

In the season 5 episode Quartet, Thursday covers up for a woman who pushed her abusive husband down the stairs, saying that he must have tripped. Morse also vocally disagrees with this. However, I think the writer intended Thursday’s actions here to be more sympathetic. Which yeah, fair enough, right? The wife doesn’t deserve to go to jail for defending herself. But the problem here is Thursday’s interpretation of justice. At no point, even after seeing evidence of domestic abuse towards the wife twice (and it’s implied that there was more that occurred prior to the episode that he knew about) does he arrest or question the husband. He thinks that because the husband died, that’s justice done. He didn’t actually try to carry out justice using the legal system. And I know that legally domestic abuse can be a tricky thing, especially in the 60s, but Thursday essentially ignores his duty as a police officer to intervene in the obvious domestic abuse situation, and then covers up for the wife. And the line that genuinely bothers me so much, and is what makes me think we’re meant to interpret his actions as good:

Thursday: God was out, he left me in charge

Like, no, Thursday, you’re a police officer and it’s your job to carry out the law, not allow an abuse situation to escalate to the point where the wife is forced to kill her husband in self-defence and then lie about it. And i’m positive that this was a quote featured on the official Endeavour Twitter page when the episode aired, so I think we’re meant to be like ‘oh yeah, that’s reasonable’, not ‘uhhhhhh wtf’.

Another, more recent example: season 7. During episode 1, ‘Oracle’, Thursday believes that Carl Sturgis is guilty of the murder of Molly Andrews - his girlfriend - on the towpath. He is questioned. He says he is innocent, and also has an alibi for the murder. Morse believes that Sturgis is innocent; Thursday believes he is guilty.

[SEASON 7 SPOILERS]

Thursday then spends the rest of the season following Sturgis around, trying to find evidence that he’s the towpath killer. Morse finds out about this and tells him to stop. He doesn’t stop. A different man is caught in the act at the towpath, and after being chased by a group of young women, is hit by a car and dies. It’s decided that he was the towpath killer.

Then, Strange searches a house that turns out to be owned by Sturgis. During this search, Strange finds a kidnapped woman, Jenny Tate, in an upstairs room. It turns out that Sturgis did kill Molly Andrews, and all of the other young women at the towpath, and that the man who died at the towpath was a copycat killer. Thursday’s actions here - stalking Carl Sturgis - are justified by the narrative because Sturgis was guilty all along, despite there being evidence to the contrary, and lawfully Thursday should not have been pursuing Sturgis after he was released from police custody.

But the worst thing Thursday does is literal police violence - and on quite a few occasions.

The “Good” Police officers

Now, I’m going to talk about two instances within the show where Thursday uses unlawful violence, and people within the CID cover up for him.

1. Coda.

(disclaimer: i haven’t watched this episode in ages, so if i get a fact wrong i’m sorry but i know the general gist is right)

Thursday is interrogating Bernie Waters, a young man with connections to the Matthews gang. He wants information about... something, I think it might be regarding a possible power struggle within the gang, or a crime somewhere. Morse is waiting outside, unaware of what Thursday is doing. He goes into the warehouse where Thursday and Waters are, to find Thursday... it’s unclear what he’s doing, honestly, the scene is framed so we can’t see properly, but it’s enough to cause Waters pain, and when Thursday lets go, Waters is bending over and breathing heavily.

Now, Morse doesn’t agree with this, and tells Thursday so. Morse: ‘I don’t remember anything about that in the Sergeant’s training manual’. He knows that Thursday isn’t above iffy conduct (he punches Teddy Samuels in the face in the pilot, and pays a newspaper salesman for information in Home). But in the end, out of loyalty to Thursday, Morse doesn’t mention it to Bright. (Similarly, in the pilot, Morse is outright asked by the CS if Thursday punched Samuels, and Morse says no, he didn’t.) Thursday gets away with it.

So, Morse is the so called “good” police officer. Telling Thursday he doesn’t agree with his methods isn’t going to get him to stop. He’s the one who people say, oh, but he doesn’t commit acts of violence towards members of the public. He just turns a blind eye to the officers that do do that.

And I don’t care that Waters is a criminal, or has connections to this gang. Police officers don’t beat up people so they give up information. That isn’t lawful.

2. Prey.

I had a conversation with another member of the fandom about this recently, and we both agreed that it really bothered us. For a large portion of the episode, the CID has in custody Mr Hodges, a park warden who offered a lift to Ingrid Hjort, a missing young woman. He’s also implicated in a similar case from around a year ago, in which a woman was sexually assaulted and left in a coma. He’s in custody for much of the episode, constantly changing his story about Hjort, but maintaining that they can’t prove his guilt. In a search of his property, Strange finds underwear belonging to the woman from a year ago, which would prove his guilt in that case. However, before Strange can return and present this evidence, Morse and Thursday are questioning Hodges again. Hodges says ‘I didn’t do it, and you can’t prove that I did’, while leering at Thursday. Thursday says ‘Can’t prove it, he says’, stands up and starts beating Hodges.

Again, this isn’t presented as a good thing. Morse attempts to pull Thursday off Hodges, and afterwards CS Bright yells at him, saying they’d just received evidence from Strange.

However, a plotline in this season is a bullet in Thursday’s lung, left from when he was shot at the end of the previous season’s finale, Neverland. This causes him pain and frequent coughing fits. And, you know, he’s dealing with a lot at home, like his son saying he wants to join the army. Bright understands this. Thursday is under a lot of pressure.

Then, Bright tells Thursday that he will write in his report that Hodges fell down the stairs on the way back to his cell.

So this time, instead of having a junior officer showing loyalty by not reporting an incident, we have a senior officer lying to protect his subordinate. And again, it’s framed like Bright is proving his loyalty to Thursday, but... police officers should not beat up people they’re questioning. Like Bright said, they had just gathered enough evidence to charge Hodges, so this was unnecessary.

Other incidents of note

There’s a lot to talk about in Inspector Morse and Lewis too, but I’m not going to elaborate on them in this post. If you want me to, drop me a reply or DM and I will. These include:

- Morse lying about his identity in order to gain entry to a suspect’s college rooms (Inspector Morse, ‘The Dead of Jericho’)

- Morse and Lewis entering a possible suspect’s flat without a warrant (Inspector Morse, ‘Last Seen Wearing’)

- Lewis entering a member of the public’s house and threatening her child by shouting in his face and grabbing his arms (Lewis, ‘Expiation’. This is called out in the episode by CS Innocent, however she doesn’t actually punish him in any way, and it’s framed as if Lewis’s actions were perfectly reasonable because the child was withholding information. It’s also worth noting that this child is black.)

- Hathaway threatening a teenager after he possibly is lying during a murder investigation (Lewis, ‘Intelligent Design’. The teenager commits suicide soon after, and it’s strongly implied that while the threats weren’t the sole cause of him killing himself, they were the breaking point for him.)

- Lewis and Hathaway hounding a suspect for the entirety of an episode despite him not being guilty of anything (Lewis, ‘The Mind Has Mountains’)

- Edit: Morse lying about a woman's involvement in several murders in order to get her a lesser sentence (Inspector Morse, 'Service of All the Dead')

General points

Often in police shows, the police officers commit actions which, while illegal, are framed within the show as being necessary evils. For example, two detectives have strong reason to believe a suspect is guilty. Instead of obtaining a search warrant, they enter the suspect’s house without one and search the place for evidence. They end up finding evidence that the suspect is guilty. Despite the fact that the detectives broke the law by illegally searching the house, they are justified by the fact that they found enough evidence to prosecute the guilty person. We, the viewers, are meant to find these illegal actions reasonable because they ultimately lead to justice being served; the ends justify the means. Well, no. In the case of police officers breaking the law, they don’t.

Conclusion

Endeavour is hardly the worst example of ‘copaganda’, i.e. propaganda specifically designed to paint the police force in a positive, rosy light. It’s set in the 1960s, it isn’t relevant in the 21st century. Nevertheless, I believe that any show where the main characters are police officers is a form of copaganda, even if unintentionally. We are meant to side with the protagonist in any media (unless they’re an antihero, which is not the case in Endeavour). In Endeavour, the protagonist is Morse, who is a police officer. The majority of the main characters are also police officers. No matter how morally grey Thursday is painted as, he is still a protagonist.

I’m not saying we should stop watching Endeavour. It’s one of my favourite shows. But, when a show incorporates police officer characters and police violence, we need to think critically about it. We need to challenge the ideas put forwards in the show instead of just accepting them. Yes, there are more important things to be worrying about right now, but I wanted to make this post because the murder of George Floyd and the ongoing riots in Minneapolis made me consider the implications of television shows which paint the police force as the good guys, because we live in a world where the police force are not the good guys. And when our media is telling us that they are, we need to stop, take a step back, and think about why that is.

Resources:

Official George Floyd memorial fund: https://www.gofundme.com/f/georgefloyd

Minnesota Freedom Fund (raising money to pay bail for those arrested in the Minnesota riots): https://minnesotafreedomfund.org/donate

Change.org petitions to hold the police officer who murdered George Floyd accountable: https://www.change.org/p/mayor-jacob-frey-justice-for-george-floyd?utm_content=cl_sharecopy_22414602_en-US%3Av4&recruited_by_id=2b2e5010-a181-11ea-8693-a9223455fd7b&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink&utm_campaign=psf_combo_share_initial&utm_term=psf_combo_share_initial

https://www.change.org/p/minneapolis-police-dept-hold-minneapolis-police-accountable-for-killing-george-floyd-as-he-begs-don-t-kill-me

Black Lives Matter website: https://blacklivesmatter.com/

A report of the independent review of deaths and serious incidents in police custody. This is very long, and even so only a general overview, but I would recommend Trends in deaths in police custody and suicides following police custody and section 13, Police Misconduct: https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/655401/Report_of_Angiolini_Review_ISBN_Accessible.pdf

Some graphs showing deaths in police custody in England and Wales over the past decade: https://www.inquest.org.uk/deaths-in-police-custody

Article about increase in deaths in police custody in the UK: https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/police-custody-deaths-uk-latest-increase-2017-a8462616.html

#endeavour #itv endeavour #lewis #itv lewis #inspector lewis #inspector morse #itv inspector morse #endeavour morse #fred thursday #robbie lewis #robert lewis #james hathaway

44 notes · View notes

dwtsfun · 3 years

Text

Dancing with the Stars Season 29 Week 10: Let’s Talk

So I spent some extra time really thinking about how I want to approach talking about this week. There are many parts and I want to address and I wanna do it as thoroughly as I can. So first let me get the trivial things out of the way. Tyra looked amazing. I loved the judges’ entrance. CAI looked incredible too. Bruno looked great. Derek’s suit would’ve looked better if it were a different color. Maybe a darker and cooler color would’ve been better, like a green, blue or purple.

Okay now let me address the elephant in the room. Nelly. So here’s where I stand. He deserves to be in the final as much as anyone else that is there right now. Period. You can dislike it all you want, but he earned his spot. He is not a Skeleton type where he hasn’t improved, can’t dance for shit, talks shit about EVERYONE and expects to be rewarded high scores for terrible dances. From what we have all seen, Nelly seems to be genuinely shocked that he’s being received well and at the fact that he is doing as well as he is. And he’s hasn’t shown a sense of entitlement that Skeleton always had surrounding him. Plus, he minds his business and doesn’t bad mouth the other celebs. So I’m going to fully reject that comparison. It’s asinine.

“But he was the worst dancer left!” Okay. And? Your point? This is not new. We have had plenty of celebs who were not one of the best dancers make it to the finals. Kelly Osbourne made the finals over Aaron Carter and Joanna Krupa. Cristian de la Fuente made it over Mario. Marie Osmond made it over Sabrina Bryan and Jennie Garth. Jerry Rice made it over Lisa Rinna. Bristol Palin and Bill Engvall made it over everyone. Candace and Alek beat out a ton of people. Noah made it in over Nastia. Ginger dumbass (I actually have real issues with this lady) made it in over Wanya. David Ross got second place. Lauren Alaina got in over James van der Beek. And Nelly making it as far as he has should not be shocking. He’s got the biggest name of everyone on the show. He’s not a bad dancer (he’s actually pretty decent and better than most of the people that I just listed). And his journey is the quintessential DWTS journey. The audience loves a person that comes in with no experience, embraces the experience and improves as the weeks go on. So it’s very strange to me that Nelly is garnering this type of reaction because he’s “the worst left”. It’s almost like a lot of fans have never watched this show before. So I have to wonder what is driving this issue with him (I know why and I’m sure you all know too). It’s the same thing that drove (and still drives the uproar) for Jacoby placing higher than Aly back in season 16.

“But what about his sexual assault allegations! He shouldn’t succeed because of those.” Yes, I know those are surrounding him. Yes, I know he’s been arrested. Yes, I know it likely happened (and for those of you that are going to come in here acting like I’m doubting survivors, I am not. But I have a platform and I’m not trying to be sued if anyone on his team comes across this post). I am not absolving him of that. BUT, many of the fans don’t know that. To them, he’s just the really famous rapper that made those couple of songs that they like and has worked with Tim McGraw. He might even be their favorite rapper. We also cannot suddenly choose to take the moral high ground when it comes to Nelly, while still watching and supporting this show. This show has casted several different types of abusers, racists, downright hateful people and alleged MURDERERS since it’s inception. And it sympathizes with them. This is actually a shoe where many stars go so that they can try to rehab their image. So that moral high ground approach just doesn’t work for this show. Especially not when there is another alleged abuser sitting right next to him. You can make the personal choice not to vote for him for whatever reason. That is fine. But you also have to know that your continued support of the show is going to allow them to keep casting these types of celebrities.

“But Skai and Johnny were just better.” Yes. That is very true. AND people weren’t voting for them in the way that they were voting for everybody else. Each of them had already had at least one bottom 2 appearance. It made sense for them to both end up in the bottom 3 on double elimination night and be sent home. It’s actually what should have happened to Ally last season when she ended up in the bottom 2 with James.

“But his dances sucked!” I will get to his dances from Monday later on in the post. But his dances throughout the season largely did not suck. I will give you his first paso. That was a mess. The rest of his dances were decent to very good.

“Women have it harder than men on this show!” Well see, here is where need some more nuance. White men (pros and celebs alike) get rewarded for the bare minimum on this show. The judges will (and have) rip apart a Black, Indigenous or Asian man very easily. I would actually say that white women are more fairly treated than any other group besides their white male counterparts. The rest of us fall below everyone else in the social hierarchy.

Okay. I’ve gone on a lot so I’m going to make these rankings pretty short.

1. Skai and Alan- I am ranking these based on my personal enjoyment of both dances, So if you’ve followed me for a long time, you know that I love me a good Viennese waltz. And this was beautiful. Skai’s top line is gorgeous. She was very elegant. And the balance of confidence and vulnerability was something I have not seen from Skai this season. Her cha-cha was a definite redemption. I thought she did a great job with her hip action. She was loose. She was sure of herself. She was confident. I’m glad Skai got to have a week where everything was just top notch. If she had to leave, this was the perfect note to leave on.

2. Johnny and Britt- I really loved both of these dances as well. I was shocked at how well their salsa went. Johnny seemed to do a much better job of understanding the movement of it and executing it. As for the jazz, it was amazing. I loved it. And I loved that it didn’t seem like the freestyle lite routines that we’re used to seeing when couples are assigned jazz. These two should be incredibly proud of everything that they accomplished. I spent the season comparing Johnny to Evan Lysacek and while I think Evan beats Johnny in ballroom, I think Johnny was the overall better dancer.

3. Justina and Sasha- I really really liked this tango. I’m not sure if I would’ve given it a 10, because there were definite issues with her frame throughout. But, it was a huge improvement over their last one, so I’m okay with it. She wasn’t hopping throughout the dance and there was a difference in the way she embodied it that I just liked more. Maybe it was the lack of the character thrown on top of a dance that already has a distinct built in character. As for their contemporary, it was very pretty. I don’t care much for that style, but the perfect score was well deserved.

4. Nelly and Daniella- Like everyone else tonight, Nelly definitely brought his A-game. That paso was a huge improvement from the first time that he did it. There was way more artistry this time around. He was shaping properly minus a few moments. He was smooth and intentional. It was actually very good. His feet still need work, but this was a very nice dance. I liked that Daniella left his shirt off because we really got to see all of the shaping. He is also very nice to look at lol. I honestly felt like this could have been a very solid 27. I could even see Bruno throwing in a 10 because of how attentive he was to the smaller details of this dance. As for the jive, this was actually the dance where I felt Nelly was most at ease. To me, this was their best dance of the season. That final gear that I could sense they hadn’t tapped into yet, was finally realized. Now from the way a lot of the fans were talking, you’d think this dance was a disaster. But it was far from it. He messed up the choreography a few times, so I don’t think it should’ve gotten a 30. But it was no less than a 27. Everything else he did was actually really good. Daniella put in a lot of content into this dance and he really nailed it. Also, recently there have been a ton of dances that were given perfect scores that may not have deserved them (including a few this season). So I don

5. Kaitlyn and Artem- Their paso was a definite improvement over the first time they did it. And I think it was technically the best dance of the first round. However, I still wasn’t feeling it. It was still too restrained for my liking. And while Derek tried to explain it away by saying that was the character of the dance, I just can’t let that slide.Their contemporary was beautiful though. By the time we got to their dance, I was all contemporary’d out because it was the last of three. So I didn’t appreciate it as much at first. But upon my second and third viewing of it, I actually really liked it. Everything that I had wanted from her in the paso and the Argentine tango was sitting right in this dance. I wish she had taken some of that and put it into those two dances as well. I might’ve actually been able to truly get behind her.

6. Nev and Jenna- Their foxtrot was an improvement but like my feeling with Kaitlyn, I just didn’t care. It was good. I don’t feel anything when he dances. It feels very hollow. His contemporary was nice but of the three contemporaries, I liked it the least. It didn’t really stand out. It was there. It was good. Perfect even. I wasn’t all that impressed though. I wish he would stop lying about his dance experience.

So that’s it. Let me know your thoughts on the night and I will talk to you all soon.

#dancing with the stars #DWTS #skai jackson #johnny weir #Justina Machado #Nelly #kaitlyn bristowe #Nev Schulman #jenna johnson #artem chigvintsev #daniella karagach #sasha farber #Britt Stewart #alan bersten #season 29

8 notes · View notes

winkingjisoo · 3 years

Text

Say You Won’t Let Go

Hey, are you free tonight?

Am I? I was busy checking on my belongings when I received her text message. It was odd that am receiving this now. I only have several hours left before I leave and now this. Maybe it's now or never?

Jisoo was staring at her phone when another text popped up.

Babe, I am excited to see you. I miss you. Be safe, okay?

She smiled sadly and realized how life took her kindness for granted and she never wanted to hurt anyone else. She's almost done fixing her things when she saw an old photo kept in her small box, it was her and the girl she secretly admired for years. She's as beautiful as she is years ago. I am still lost on your eyes, but those eyes, they never lie. I know you never felt the same and I am finally letting go of my grip. She placed the frame on top of the side table and left it there.

*beep*

Seen. Why are you leaving me on seen? You can say no.

With a deep sigh, Jisoo replied to the message and without a doubt, she grabbed her shoulder bag and keys. I will see you again, and then.. maybe never. She went out of the apartment and made sure it's locked. Everything that's possible came inside her mind, but one impossible thing made her smile a bit. Maybe now she wants me too.

Jisoo took her phone our while she's on the bus and replied on the other text she received.

Hey, I am sorry. I'd be coming home...

I know I am being unfair. You have all the rights to hate me, but if this chance would mess me up, I will never regret anything.

Please still see me so we can talk. I will face you bravely, you know I never wanted to hurt you but I'd like to be selfish tonight. I am really sorry.

It took her minutes before finally deciding to send it. A tear left her eyes as if it's been there trying to escape several times but now it's being free.

I understand, I've always known. I still hoped you come to me instead of her. But I understand, I'll always will. Whatever happens, I will still see you.

Don't apologize, I have forgiven you beforehand. You deserve to be happy, and if it's not with me, I won't take that happiness away from you.

It's all I ever wanted to give you.

I love you, Jisoo. I wish you will be happier now. - Rose

Now I am scared. I am scared more than ever. This will be my last chance, my first chance as well, or maybe the only chance I have. If not for her, I will not be with anybody. Jisoo took her phone away after reading the message. She closed her eyes in some minutes to think and finally she made up her mind. She took her phone out and made a phone call.

*Calling Jennie*

Hello?

Hey, uhm.. I texted you back.

Oh, right. You're coming. I will just uhm, put her to sleep. Then, I'll see you. Will that be fine?

Sure. Of course.

The call ended and Jisoo is nervous as hell. This will be the first time after a long time that she will see Jennie again. Afraid and still confused, she put on her headphones and played some piano covers in her playlist. These are not just covers, Rose played those songs for her.

If only I can teach my heart to love. I will choose Rose. She did nothing else but love me, and now she's hurting.. yet she understood. I--I owe her my happiness if I will be.

The thoughts inside her mind stopped when she felt that the bus stopped as well. She stood up and released a deep sigh before getting off it. It took some minutes and she's just waiting at the bus stop where Jennie will see her. She lifted her hoodie and removed her eyeglasses for a bit. It's starting to get cold and her hands are slightly shaking. She decided to lean over the shed and closed her eyes for a bit. Minutes passed, still there's no sign of Jennie, not even a text.

Of course. I am being taken for granted again.

"Hey! I am sorry, did you wait too long?"

Since high school, yes.

"Jennie.. uhm no. I just got here. Hey, haha. How are you?" That's an awkward question for the situation but Jisoo is still composing herself.

"I'm glad to know. Rachelle took time to fall asleep, I can't just leave her, yeah?" Of course, she's your precious one. Jisoo thought. To her surprise, Jennie held her hand. She never imagined that she would feel those grip again. She badly wants to let go of it, she's having second thoughts on going back to where she initially wanted to be away from -- Jennie's comfort.

They started walking around the area until they reached the old coffee house where they used to write stories. Both of them published some books in their high school days, mostly are written by Jisoo with Jennie beside her, mainly cheering her up and giving some ideas which made Jisoo believe that she's writing a masterpiece. Jennie stopped in front of the coffee house. She stared at the sight of it while Jisoo found herself staring at the fullness of Jennie.

"Do you still write stories?" Jennie noticed Jisoo staring at her and chose to break the silence.

"No. I stopped. But I write songs, lyrics at least. I'm not good at music. She puts the melody and sings it." Although Jennie is understanding where that sentiment came from, she continued.

"You're a natural writer. May it be a song, a poem or a story. Totally something that someone can relate to. You know.."

Jisoo can't look at Jennie's eyes. She just realized what she just said and was taken aback right after. Jennie let go of Jisoo's hand. She can feel the awkwardness and tension in between but it seemed like she don't want to care or even think about it. Jisoo was about to head inside the coffee house when Jennie stopped her.

"Let's go to my place instead, I learned how to brew coffee and I want you to try it first. I hope it won't fail tho." Jisoo was confused and was not able to say a thing when Jennie dragged her and walked as fast as she can.

What is she thinking? If she just wanted to see me, she should've not left the house and just have me go in there. Jendeukie, stop being careless...

*beep*

You're probably away from home as you see this. Please take care. Meet me tomorrow. Namusairo Coffee Shop, 9 am.

Jisoo just replied a smiley to the text message she received as they entered Jennie's humble abode. Jennie excitedly opened the door and let Jisoo in first. She was like a kid being excited on a thing that she wanted a long time ago, like it's finally coming.

"We should've just stayed at the old coffee house you know. Or asked me to just go here, why do you need to pick me up from the bus station if you plan on drinking coffee in here. You're weird, Jennie."

"Jendeuk." Jennie smiled shyly and have gone straight to the fridge to get some beers.

"Wait, beer? I don't drink beer." Jennie creased her eyebrows and for Jisoo it felt like World War is coming. But Jennie was suddenly relaxed and just put the beers back in the fridge. She took the Soju instead.

They decided to drink at the terrace where they have a good sight of the moonlight above them. Them, under the moon, would always be a familiar sight for both of them. Jisoo, she didn't really know what she came for. She can't help but wonder why of all the days that Jennie would remember texting her after a long time, it would be tonight. She should be moving in with the girl who never left her side.

"What's this, Jennie? Why did you text me? Why do you want me to come over? Why now?" Jisoo

"Whoa whoa! That's a lot of questions, I can answer them but can we take it slow, we haven't even started yet." Jennie started drinking her shot. "I missed you."

And just like that, Jisoo felt like her body froze. She can't find the right words to say so she took her shot as fast as she can.

"Are you happy now, Jisoo? I don't really want to get back to your life, I know you hated me. I know y--"

"I never hated you... I loved you."

Jennie was just staring at Jisoo who's staring at the moon at the moment. She can't believe she's about to hear it again tonight. It's been years since the last time she heard of it.

"I did, too." Now it's Jisoo'd turn to look blankly at Jennie's eyes. She thought she'd be lying about it so she looked straight at her eyes. But she saw the unexpected, she saw the truth.

"You've got to be kidding me, Jennie Kim. You're unbelievable." She tried to shake it off, with all the fear that she had, Jennie was telling her that she loved her, too. It sounded surreal but she just can't believe it. Why suffer all those years, why let go of everything they could have had?

"I needed to say it. Not long before everything could go south for us. I just though maybe, I can still make it up to you."

"You knew, right? That I'll be leaving tonight? Who told you?"

"If not now, Jisoo. When? When do you want me to tell you? When I would regret it for the rest of my life? I need you, I need to be with you. I still.. I still feel the same.

"You're asking me when, Jen? Two fucking years ago! I suffered, I thought I would never be enough, I did everything to get rid of myself who's God knows someone who just wants to love you and be with you but I can't."

"Jisoo, stop talking as if it's just you who suffered. I suffered, too. And it still hurts. If I had a choice, I will stay."

Jisoo can't believe everything she's hearing right now. She felt like a fool when she hurriedly came to Jennie to take a chance but it seemed like she don't want it anymore.

"You don't understand, Jen. If I knew you felt the same, I should've waited. I can wait. I waited since long ago."

Jennie let the ambiance calm down before she responded. She took her next shot as she speak.

"I honestly thought you will. You believed that love is patient. Maybe I got that wrong? You wrote it in your book, the one that I read a lot. I love that book, it's like you're talking to me, at least I think that's me."

"Of course, it's you. Who would it be?"

"I don't know. By that time I didn't know Jisoo. I got scared."

I can't believe you felt that way, Jen. I thought you felt safe with me.

Jisoo was just our of words, she can't contain the emotion she's having right now. She felt dizziness when she realized she's been drinking for every waking silence Jennie and her is having right now.

"Jisoo, listen." Jennie held Jisoo's face and felt tears on the woman's cheeks.

"I... I love you. Don't.. don't leave me now. I am more than ready for us."

"What if.. what if I'm not ready, Jen? What will you do?"

The moment Jennie heard that, tears escaped her eyes.

"Then maybe, jegwi should not stick to shumon anymore. Maybe it's time to finally let go. I'm sorry if I had my hopes up.."

Jennie did not let go of Jisoo's face, she leaned closer to her instead.

"So tell me, are you not ready for me?"

Jisoo was still reading Jennie's eyes. She could tell Jennie's telling the truth and her heart can't help it. She badly want to kiss the girl in front of her. She wanted to let go of all the things that holds her back from doing so.

As she was trying to get a grip of the reality, Jennie closed the gap between them. She couldn't believe Jennie is kissing her right now. Jisoo can still taste the alcohol on Jennie's mouth but she willingly kissed her back. Her worries, it's been taken away and she just thought maybe, maybe it's worth a shot.

It was a long night for the both of them. After that, no words was said. They decided to rest as they felt like they had a long night.

Namusairo Coffee Shop, 9 am.

Rosé was waiting at the coffee shop already. She ordered Jisoo's usual and hers. She was also busy listening to music when Jisoo came.

"Hey, you're here early." Jisoo said and hugged the girl from behind.

"No! Hahaha. You're late. I said 9, not 9:15." Rosé's playful tone made it easier for Jisoo to turn her frown into a smile. Probably because she's nervous about this conversation, but she promised to face this girl bravely.

"You ordered my coffee! Yes! Also, I'm sorry for being late in your watch! Huh, still 15 minutes advance!" Jisoo have it light with Rosé, not awkwardness anymore.

"You want to eat something? You look pale."

"Oh no, I'm okay with coffee. I just woke up, that's why."

"Hmm. I see. How's your back?" Rosé sounded sincerely concered about Jisoo. She knows that Jisoo not sleeping in her bed would give a different kind of discomfort. She can't believe she convinced Jisoo to move in with her. At least she did before it never happened.

"It's not hurting lately. I think the medications worked. Thanks, Doctor Park."

"I hate youuuu! You don't have to do me dirty!" Rosé pouted as if she's really offended.

"YAH! It's not my intention to let you feel that way. I was just saying that.. you'll make a great doctor, babe." Jisoo was shocked by the way 'babe' was blurted out automatically when she wanted to address Rosé, she felt like she can't do it. She can't break Rosé's heart.

Rosé just smiled. She would stop in there, she thought.

"How is she?" Rosé have known for years how long Jisoo was head over heels for Jennie. She wonder how she's going and how did last night's incident went.

"She's good. I guess. She needed to be with Rachelle and I think they're adapting to changes already." Jisoo was hesitant to go with the conversation but Rosé is making everything easier for her.

"It went well, right? As it should? I'll kill you if it didn't after you ditched me." Rosé jokingly said.

"It did. She... she wanted me too." Jisoo thought that she was being selfish but that's the lightest way to say it to Rosé.

"Good then. I guess, I can get over it.. although.. I still think letting you be selfish is a bad idea. I could've had you, Jisoo. We were so good together."

"I can say that, too. You took care of me. You love me. And I love you too. You know that, right?"

"Yeah, just not as much as you love her." Rosé was just looking at Jisoo's eyes. She knows she needed to say that or she'll regret saying everything to Jisoo. "Jisoo, this is another bold and foolish move.. but.. if in case Jennie, you know, leave again.. I am here. I'll always be."

"Rosé."

"I know. You won't like the idea. I'm just saying. Just let me.."

Jisoo held Rosé's hand. It's warm. It was the warmth that comforted her.

"It's okay, Jis. I'm okay."

Rosé left on a good note. She even gave Jisoo one last gift. It was a demo CD of Rosé. Face down when Rosé left it on the table, Jisoo was left dumbfounded.

Jisoo checked the CD and saw it's title.

"Just when you felt like giving up on her again, say you won't let go."

youtube

3 notes · View notes

wildly-lost-lantern · 4 years

Text

Seven Point Star

A/N GUESS WHOS BACK!!! IS ME BITCHES! Ah this took so so so long to write and get out. I’m sorry. But, I’m having a grand ole time writing, and I’m already working out the third chapter.

Pairings: OT7 x Female OC

Genre: Lowkey crack, lowkey fluff.

Warnings: None right now!

Word count: 2500+

Chapter Two: Meeting Them

Two days after my audition, I was sitting in a café with my best friend, Jennie. She sat back in her chair, a smug smile playing on her lips. All I could do was groan at her.

"Seriously, Yuna. I'm sure you have nothing to worry about. You'll be fine, I promise!" her voice conveyed an amusement I wasn't happy about. I glared at her slightly, annoyed that she didn't understand my concerns.

"Look, I'm just concerned. What if-" my sentence was cut short by my ringtone. I looked down and saw BigHit flashing across my screen. Immediately, I answered. "This is Park Yuna," I said, professionalism lacing my words. The woman on the other end of the line told me that I have officially been offered the job, and to look at my email for the paperwork and see when my first day was. After a brief conversation, the call ended.

"Told you so," Jennie's smug response made me roll my eyes. She was insufferable when she was right about something. I simply ignored her and looked out the window. A face caught my eye, and for a brief moment, I thought it was my mom.

"Oh my god," my voice was barely above a whisper, and by the time Jennie turned to see what had caught my attention, the woman was gone. I brushed it off and we continued our conversation.

"So? You never did tell me if you met any of the idols," she said to me, leaning forward as if we were talking about some big secret. I shrugged in response.

"Yeah, I met Namjoon and Hoseok, so what? They're people too, you know," I pretended to be disinterested, obviously to mess with her. She always got so excited by meeting new idols. She worked with them on a daily basis, so how she was always so excited was beyond me.

"And your point is, exactly?" she sassed back, her left eyebrow raised in a 'try me' way. I simply giggled.

"They're nice. I mostly spent the time teaching, you know, trying to get a job and all?" I let my snarky attitude come out in full affect. She simple scoffed and pouted my way.

"You're no fun," she said. If one could speak in tiny font, she would be. I just smiled at her, raising my cup in agreement. “Anyway, I’m proud of you. When’s your first day?” She then asked, subtly asking when I would see those men again.

“Monday. I’m teaching them choreo for their new song. They’re getting ready for a comeback,” I said, drinking the last of my coffee. I noticed a younger girl watching me, so I leaned in to Jennie to whisper, “We should probably talk about this in private.” I glanced back at the girl, noticing she was still watching.

“Yeah, so, let’s grab some more coffee and head home, how’s that sound?” She asked, making sure it looked like we were done having a conversation and just leaving.

“Honestly, I’m ready to get out of these, clothes. Let’s do it,” I said, standing with her to go to the counter. When I glanced back at the kid, she was whispering to her friend, point at Jennie and me. As soon as our drinks were up, we left the shop and walked to our shared apartment.

“Anyway, I got asked out, again. Like, can’t these guys realize I’m not the dating type? I like being able to just go out and have fun, and,” Jennie looked over at me, realizing I wasn’t listening, “sleep with whatever dumb guy looks at me for three seconds to long? Getting wasted every night. You’re not listening anymore.” She crossed her arms over her chest, sending a soft glare my way.

“Oh! Sorry, sorry, I zoned out. I should be getting the track shortly after my forms are completed, so I was working through some things in my head. I’m all ears now, though!” I smiled and nudged her gently, guiding her back to her story.

Once we both made it home, we got comfy and put on a Netflix show, mostly for background noise as I worked on my paperwork. Shortly after I emailed it back to the company, I got sent the new albums completed track list. Much to Jennie’s disappointment, I couldn’t share it with her at all. I downloaded the files onto my phone and plugged my headphones in, getting right to work. Writing down counts, moves, positions for each of the seven men, transitions, and everything else took nearly two and a half hours. That was only one song. I spent the rest of the night working on other songs before I caved and went to sleep.

I woke up the next day, getting right back to work, finishing up the choreographies for the last few songs through breakfast and the first half of the day. After I ate lunch, I went to the dance studio I practiced at, and worked out the kinks in as many songs as I could get through. Then my phone rang. “Hey, Jennie. What’s up?” I answered my phone, chugging down some water after a particularly difficult dance sequence.

“Hey, it’s almost six-thirty. Want me to bring dinner to the studio?” She asked, obviously cooking. If it was already six-thirty and I got through two and a half songs, I could probably go home for the day.

“No, I’ll come home. I’m done for the day I think. I got a lot done,” I said, starting to pack my stuff. By the time the call ended, I was already out of the studio, walking to the apartment. Then, my phone rang again, this time and unknown number. Not knowing who it could be, I sent it to voicemail. Thirty seconds later, the same number called again.

“Hello?” I said, answering it this time. I tried to stay as neutral as possible, not knowing if it could be a fellow staff member or not.

“Hi, is this Park Yuna?” the person on the other end asked. I thought I recognized the voice, but I wasn’t sure.

“Yes, may I ask who’s calling?” I responded, keeping my voice respectful. I felt myself walking quicker due to nerves.

“Ah, sorry, it’s Kim Namjoon. I was wondering, have you been working on the choreography? I know it was all kind of quick, but seriously, you are the best we had seen. You even taught me a lyrical piece,” he quickly explained. I laughed softly, shaking my head.

“Yes, I’ve been working on it. I have the title track down, and another one finished. We can get started right away tomorrow morning,” I said, keeping my confidence high. “Why did you call me about that, though? Wouldn’t it be better left to managers or something?” I asked, coming to a stop outside my apartment. A soft laugh came from the other side, as I rested against the door frame.

“Well, yeah. But as the leader of this group, I like to know all the people we work closely with,” he said with a sigh. I felt like he was hiding something, but I decided not to push my luck.

“That makes sense. I’ll see you in the morning, Mr. Kim,” I said, getting ready to hang up the phone call.

“In the morning then, Miss Park,” He said, ending the call. I smiled softly at my phone, slightly amused by the leader.

I entered my apartment, wrapping my tail around my calf. “Jennie? I’m home,” I called out as I took off my shoes and put my bag down.

“Ah! Yuna, I’m in here. I’m almost done,” Jennie yelled from the kitchen. I smiled, walking in that direction. “I made a stir fry, babes. How did it go at the studio?” She was putting food onto plates for us when I stepped into the room.

“It went great, I got two done. The title track and an extra one just in case they want to work on something else tomorrow,” I said as I sat down at the kitchen island. Jennie sat across from me and smiled.

“So, are you excited?” she leaned forward slightly, her eyes shining with interest. The way she sat, staring at me was making it known we were having this conversation even if I didn’t like it.

“I’m really excited actually. Maybe a little nervous,” I started, taking a bite into my food. “This is really good! Thank you,” I immediately started shoveling food into my mouth, having not realized how hungry I was.

“Jeez, lady, breath!” Jennie laughed out loud at me, obviously amused by my antics. “Anyway, did anything interesting happen today?” She asked me, trying to pry some sort of gossip from me. Her face was easy to read, having known her most of my life.

“Uhm, nothing much, I think? I’ve just been, you know, working?” I giggled at her softly, my natural snark coming through.

“Yeah, okay. But seriously, did you get to meet anyone new? Make any friends?” She asked, quickly finishing up her food. All I could do was shake my head.

“No, I locked myself in the sound proof dance studio and just focused,” I said, getting up to help with the dishes that needed to be done. Just leaving them out would stress me out. After the small chore was done, Jennie and I sat on the couch, watching some show on Netflix. A few hours had passed, and I was getting tired, so I stood up. “Alright, it’s late, so I’m going to bed, babes,” I told her. I gave her a hug and went to my room to crawl into bed.

The next morning, I woke up to my alarm blaring my favorite song. I knew Jennie was already gone, so I loaded up my Spotify and started to get ready for my day. I threw on my favorite work out leggings and paired them with my favorite long-sleeved shirt. I pulled my dark brown hair up into a messy bun. I ate a quick breakfast, and then collected my dance book, phone charger, water bottle, and a change of socks. I threw it all into a small back pack, and then grabbed my lanyard with my keys and wallet. Pulling on my sneakers, I headed to the building. I had to get a badge for being able to get deeper into the building without having to get a security escort if I was going to continue to work there full time.

It was nine when I arrived at the BigHit building, which was just enough time to get all settled in before the group was scheduled to arrive. From the moment I stepped foot in the building, it was a whirl wind of chaos getting me in their employee system and my security badge. Before I knew it, I was in the practice room, reading over my notes. Five minutes later, BTS started to stream in through the door. Once they all had arrived, I smiled softly and shook my head. This was it. Time to prove my worth.

“Alright! Let’s get started,” I clapped my hands to get their attention. I suddenly felt a little over whelmed with all seven pairs of eyes on me. Nevertheless, I continued on. “I’m Yuna, your new choreographer. J-Hope, I’ll probably work closely with you. Anything I need to know about you all before we get started?” I asked, looking around the small circle. Immediately, J-Hope stepped toward me and smiled brightly.

“Nice to see you again, Yuna. Welcome to the team. You did really well, and I’m glad the company decided to choose you. Let me know if and how I can help. Again, please call me by my real name, not my stage name,” he said, gently patting my shoulder.

“You’re not Korean? Where are you from?” Taehyung, the ever curious guy he is, asked me. I looked at him shocked, not used to being asked that so directly. However, before I could reply, Yoongi stepped in.

“Taehyung, you can’t just be so blunt with people. It sets them on edge,” He scolded softly. I just shook my head and laughed.

“Well, it’s okay. I’m from America. I moved here to work for companies like BigHit, because they best options in America was ballet companies, and that just wasn’t for me,” I explained to them. They all looked at me with wide eyes.

“Wait, so you just left your home country and moved somewhere different… for a job?” Jeongguk asked me, looking amazed. I simply nodded in response. “Whoa, noona, you’re so cool!” He clapped slightly, his bright smile making me smile.

“Actually, you all are older than me,” I said softly, suddenly unsure if they’d be so happy to have me here if they knew I was young. There was a collective gasp throughout the room.

“Really?? What year were you born? I can’t believe you’re younger than me,” the overly excited youngest asked me, nearly bouncing with joy.

“Uhm, ninety-nine,” I said, suddenly overwhelmed by his energy. “Alright, we should get started. Which song do you guys want to start with?” After a brief discussion on the best place to start, we decided to go with the chorus of the title song. I jumped right in to blocking making sure the boys knew which direction they were going to be coming from as well. “Now, you, Hoseok, you’ll come center for twenty counts. Okay, good. Now you have this move,” I said, demonstrating the arm movement with the foot work I decided on.

“Wow, you’re really a great teacher, Yuna-ssi,” Seokjin said, grabbing my shoulder gently. I flushed under the praise, although it was completely innocent. We continued through with learning the transition into the chorus, out of the chorus formation, and the dance during. After about an hour of hard work, I decided on a break.

“Yah! Don’t touch that, you brat. You’ll break it,” Yoongi said to Namjoon, unsurprisingly. I turned around to see him trying to mess with the speakers and sound system in the room. I giggled and went back to looking over my notes, taking long drinks of my water.

“Yuna! Watch this! I turned to see Jeongguk goofing around with Jimin. I shook my head at their antics. All of a sudden a familiar song started to blast through the speakers. My phone had started to ring. When I looked down at the caller ID, I almost stopped breathing. On my screen, in bold lettering, was my mother’s name. With shaking hands, I disconnected my Bluetooth and answered it.

#wildly written seven point star #wildly written fanfics #bts x oc #bts x female oc #bts fanfic #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungguk #jeon jungkook #bts fic

23 notes · View notes

readyplayerhobi · 5 years

Text

Peppermint | 01

; Hoseok x Reader

; Genre: Fluff, future light angst

; Word Count: 10.6k

; Synopsis: Achieving your dream job is something that very people manage to do, which is why you’re all the more happier when you land a job on the film team at Poppin’ Culture; the biggest pop culture website, blog and YouTube channel around. What you don’t expect however, is to fall for the exceptionally shy and awkward colleague who is not even remotely your type. Or is he?

; A/N: This is just what I’ve been writing to try and get back into the swing of things. It’s just...light and fun. Was supposed to be a one shot but it’s getting long and it feels like a good place to end as a first part! Please send me thoughts, comments and encouragements as it’s a struggle to write lately ;-;

01 ; 02

“And this is our main office. It’s open plan, as you can see so I hope that doesn’t bother you too much. We’ve found it works better to just throw ideas out in the open or to just get reactions so feel free to shout out if you need something. Everyone’s very friendly,” Seokjin smiles at you brightly, his thick lips turning up and making his eyes sparkle behind his glasses as he leads you into the wide open space. “And this is your desk. Feel free to decorate it however you want. Nothing will beat the car wreck that’s happening on Jimin’s desk.”

“Hey! This is artistic mess. Everything has a place and there is a place for everything.” The bubblegum pink haired man in question half stands, a finger pointing threateningly while his pearly white teeth peek out from beneath plush pink lips. You can’t help but smile, as his slim frame and cute cheeks make him look distinctively non-threatening and ruin any hope he has of convincing you otherwise.

It could also be the fact he looks like a hipster from Seattle with the thick, black plastic frames delicately placed on his nose and the retro 80s film shirt with an open black and white plaid shirt over the top. Still...he’s rather pretty and you wonder momentarily if you’ve somehow entered another dimension with astonishingly beautiful people.

Either that, or you’ve walked into the set of some reality TV show but you’re not quite willing to break the Matrix programming just yet.

Seokjin snorts and rolls his eyes, lifting a ring laden hand to brush his black hair out of them. It’s hindered slightly by the tan beanie on his head and you’re momentarily distracted once more by his impressive frame. The white shirt with the Jaws film poster on it stretches rather enticingly over his broad shoulders while his black, ripped jeans are snugly secured with a leather belt that has a Superman belt buckle.

Honestly, how were you meant to work in this place?

He’d already introduced you to Namjoon, the creator of Poppin’ Culture who oversaw all aspects of his slowly booming media empire along with Namjoon’s wife, Chaeyoung. She oversaw the HR aspect of everything and had been your first point of call before Seokjin had come down to retrieve you upon getting the call that you had arrived.

Seokjin is the editor of the Poppin’ Culture website, which is the big daddy of the whole enterprise. It had originally started 10 years ago in Namjoon’s university bedroom apparently, just posting reviews of retro films and any new films that came out.

A decade later and it was the biggest source of pop culture news, blogs and entertainment in the Western hemisphere. The website scores over 250,000 hits a day with the blogs averaging a pretty healthy number too and the YouTube channels generating a steady enough income to keep a small team afloat with ease.

His sheer love of all things cultural meant that Poppin’ Culture had expanded far beyond its original remit of film and now had something for everyone. There was the film blog, the gaming blog, the music blog, the television blog and even the book blog. And you’d heard rumours of them branching into sports with talk of a fighting blog and channel appearing soon which would be interesting.

Sports were a whole other thing in the world of things people obsess over.

Either way, you’d been rather desperate to get a job here when the opening had appeared on the job listings website for a new in house content writer. When you’d found out that you’d got it, you were pretty sure that you’d almost deafened Sunmi with your screams of excitement.

As a film major with an English literature minor, it was perhaps the dream job to combine both of your loves together and work with people who were just as enthusiastic about the world of film as you were. Your friends and family had long since grown bored of how you picked apart the latest films or their trailers, but now you would have an audience of thousands that would not only be receptive to it, but interested too.

In your earlier meeting with Namjoon and Seokjin, they’d laid out your responsibilities for you pretty clearly. Given that you were in your six month probation period, you would be expected to create two blog articles a week with the possibility of writing a video script if it was approved by the video team.

Two articles may not sound a lot, but you’d already been informed that you would also likely have to do some indepth research into the topics to provide factual information, along with making sure it wasn’t something that had been done before. Not only this, but you would be expected to be constantly scouring the internet to find new topics of interest and trying to catch the latest leaks before they even happened.

While you’d been hired for the film team, you’d been told that most people tended to dip into other areas to help out or if they had some particular interest in it. As such, you could be expected to possibly be asked to find out the Top 10 Facts About The NES or 15 Things You Never Knew About Taylor Swift or something.

Wasn’t the most scintillating of things to you, but you were willing to branch out and help if necessary. It was a small team and you understand that sometimes you’d need to pitch in when it was required of you, which in turn meant you knew that you could rely on the same help.

“Jimin is our music guy. He’s the one who usually writes the music blogs and videos but he also does the gaming stuff sometimes. Also has a regular book blog where he reviews obscure international books because that’s his thing.” Seokjin says, rolling his eyes as he leans against the desk.

Jimin’s desk is littered with piles of CD cases - who even uses CDs anymore? - along with three different pairs of headphones. He also has a ton of Funko Pop! Vinyl figures that you recognise to be musicians along with a set of Assassin’s Creed characters. You recognise them because Sunmi’s ex-boyfriend had them too.

“Really? You’re going to come into my space, and ruin my time while insulting me? Am I going to wake up tomorrow morning to find you shitting on my lawn too?” Jimin slumps back in his chair, pulling a pair of pink and white headphones over his head to rest around his neck while eyeing the taller man with narrowed eyes.

“You live on the top floor of an apartment building ‘Min. What am I? A wizard?”

“I wish. Maybe you’d wingardium leviosa your ass off my damn desk.” He grumbles, nodding his head at you. “Have you ever read In The Miso Soup by Ryu Murakami?”

The question is so sudden that you’re left standing with wide eyes, shaking your head slowly. You’d not read a lot of translated work in college, though you were hoping to change that. Jimin sighs and slumps in his seat, clicking on his mouse a few times.

“Fucking weird dude. Still not entirely sure what went on it.”

Before you can even respond, Seokjin is leading you over to the desk behind Jimin. This desk is even messier, only you really can see the artistic mess here. It’s covered in pencil sketches that are stacked haphazardly while a high tech looking electronic drawing pad takes up most of the space with even the keyboard pushed away.

The guy sat comfortably in the green and black gaming chair has a black beanie on his head too, only he has platinum blonde hair that covers his eyes. And what pretty eyes they are when he looks up at you; as if someone has reached up into the sky and plucked two of the brightest, shiniest stars and placed them directly onto him.

“Oh, hey. I’m Jungkook. Jeon Jungkook. I’m the graphic designer here...with a side passion of actual drawing obviously. I mostly use Photoshop but I like to get a bit hands on.” He talks rapidly, his voice quite deep but soft. Pausing, he bites on the black lip ring embedded in the right side of his lower lip before sitting back.

The vibrant and colourful tattoos that run up and down his arms do nothing to hide the obvious fit physique he has and you find yourself dragging your eyes away from that ridiculously broad chest. He’s only wearing a black shirt but my god.

Seokjin lets you both talk for a little, discovering that if you need anything made graphics wise then to let Jungkook know. Apparently he’s the head designer and has two more people under him; Jennie who deals with a lot of designing and Soyeon who handles their website and online shop.

You’re then introduced to Yoongi who is in charge of sound for the videos. He’s pretty quiet but friendly and bright, secluded away in the corner of the office with a soundboard in front of him, while his co-worker Lisa, a video editor, is entirely the opposite. They’re both sat on the same bank of desks, and the difference between Yoongi’s monochromatic desk and Lisa’s bubblegum pop explosion is almost amusing.

The video game team was made of Miyeon, Yugyeom and Baekhyun who all took up the corner on the opposite end of the office to you. You weren’t a huge gamer, but apparently the video game side of Poppin’ Culture was one of the most popular and profitable so you could understand why they had the largest team compared to the others.

Your desk is opposite Jimin’s, allowing you a view of him if you look to your right and it looks sparse compared to everyone else’s. The guy behind you is Taehyung and you’re pleased to discover that he’s friendly and warm with a bright box smile that makes you feel at home instantly.

Taehyung is the other content creator on the film team and someone that you’ll be working closely with, though apparently he also works with Jimin on music. From the short conversation you have with him, it seems that Taehyung mainly specialises in foreign film and you surmise that you’ll be left with most of the more mainstream options with the Oscar bait films being split between you both.

He seems enigmatic enough, with the white ribbon wrapped around his neck and billowing white button up shirt that ends with a pair of baggy, tan trousers. He’s not wearing any shoes, or socks, and you wonder if that’s a violation of something somewhere but no one seems to be saying anything.

His entire desk is full of various plants, artistic photographs in elegant frames and beautiful old film posters in miniature form. A photo of a black and tan Pomeranian is eagerly introduced to you as Yeontan, his dog and you can’t help but laugh at how excited he is to show off his lil pup.

But perhaps not as excited as you when you discover that Friday’s are ‘Bring Your Dog To Work’ day. Apparently Taehyung, Yoongi and Jennie all bring their dogs and it usually ends up just being people playing with them.

Yep, definitely the best workplace already.

“Hey Hoseok, come here before you sit down.” Seokjin calls out to the late entry into the office before looking at you. “I’ll introduce you to our head video editor. He’s the one who usually helps with recording videos, then he’ll edit it all together. He works closely with Jungkook for graphics and if you write a script then he’ll work with you to see if you want anything extra added in like humourous cuts, edits and so forth. He’s got Lisa on his team and a guy who works part time, Taemin.”

The man in question almost shuffles forward, a delicate looking hand gripping the brown fabric strap of his shoulder bag tightly while he looks down at his scruffy, black Converse clad feet as Seokjin introduces you to him. He looks about the same height as Seokjin, though all you can see is a head of messy chestnut brown hair and black circular lens glasses that looks like they’re going to fall off his nose.

“Nice shirt.” You say with an encouraging smile, wondering why Hoseok looks like he’s trying to crawl through the floor mentally. He looks up at that with almost shockingly wide eyes and you almost groan out loud.

This place is blessed or cursed. You’re not sure which yet.

He’s wearing a faded Jurassic Park shirt, the famous logo sliced by ‘dinosaur’ claws, while a pair of ever so slightly baggy and ripped denim jeans are kept up by an oversized tan fabric belt, the end trailing down to his knee. A knit grey cardigan covers his arms and you find it oddly endearing how it’s slipping off one slim shoulder, obviously far too big for him.

The shoulder bag he’s carrying also has the Back to the Future logo on it and you point at it with a grin. “Great Scott! I like your bag too.” You point then at your own chest, your shirt emblazoned with the Back to the Future logo and frown as his eyes dart down before his cheeks flush bright red.

His obvious shyness just seems to make him more endearing to you, and you let out a quiet laugh. There’s an almost awkward silence for a moment as Hoseok just stands there, giving Seokjin tiny glances before he finally sighs and points to the desk behind yours. Hoseok almost bolts there, disappearing behind the iMac and you look back at Seokjin with a raised brow.

He kneels down so he’s closer, the music of the radio that’s blasting out 80s classics drowning out anything he might say to you. “Hoseok’s a good guy, he’s just a little socially awkward. A hard worker, and he’ll do anything you ask but...it’s a little hard to get him to open up. Keep trying though, he will occasionally have a full conversation with you and I keep trying to make sure he’s included so he doesn’t feel left out. Don’t take it personally, it’s just how he is.”

Nodding, you turn on your own iMac and wait for it to boot up before going through the process of getting everything ready for you to work. Given it’s your first day, Seokjin just gives you some simple tasks to go through to help familiarise yourself with their method of working before leaving you to your own devices.

It’s as you’re sat reading through the style guideline for the blog that you watch as Hoseok suddenly appears in the corner of your vision. He’s rolled over to the edge of his desk, hands flipping through the stacked letter tray there as he searches for something while he presses his lips together and blows his cheeks out. You can’t help but watch him with idle interest as he does so.

He’s definitely cute, in fact he’s more than cute. Hoseok is actually stunningly beautiful and from the side, you’re getting to see his arresting profile with ease. A strong jawline swoops in bold lines on his face while his nose is a straight slope with the gentlest turn at the end, his lips thin but full enough to look delightfully kissable as he pouts suddenly without thinking as the tiny frown of concentration causes his strong brows to fold in.

As he finds what he needs, you watch as he disappears back behind his screen before sighing quietly to yourself.

It’s probably not very moral, but you definitely had enough new material to keep your spank bank going for a good few months now. If nothing else, you should thank Namjoon for that.

“Did you watch Roma yet?” Taehyung asks, rolling his chair backwards until he appears in your vision. His wispy blonde hair lays straight on his forehead as he rests his hands behind his neck, letting his long sleeved blue sweater stretch across his torso. It’s unusually tight for someone who basically lives in baggy clothes; you’re pretty sure he’s even worn his pyjamas once.

Over the last three months of you working at Poppin’ Culture, you’d understandably grown close with Taehyung as you’d bonded intensely over your love of film. It turns out he was also a film major with a photography minor, meaning he was exceptionally invested in the artsy films or just films with great cinematography.

You’d already been subjected to two passion filled rants of his about Mad Max: Fury Road and Blade Runner 2049 as being prime examples of great cinematography in big budget cinema. It was okay though, as you’d already chewed off his ear about why you thought Aliens was one of the best sequels ever made in history and he’d listened with interest.

There was nothing better than someone who was willing to indulge in your long winded talks about your favourite films; from cult classics to obscure favourites to Hollywood blockbusters. Your rapport with him was so good in fact, that Seokjin had had you do a test video with him to see how well you worked in front of the camera.

The results must have been positive as you’d been given a weekly film podcast with Taehyung that talked about the week’s releases along with any news in the film world. If there was time then you both would regale viewers with your favourite films and analyse them.

So far, it was doing pretty well and you were pleased with the numbers it was pulling in. Not to mention that people seemed to like your inclusion into the videos, which was why you’d ended up in a few other videos around music or even gaming just to voice over them. Taehyung had obviously been a hit.

He had a face for the camera and you’d already jokingly suggested in many a team meeting that they should make merchandise with just his face on it. His little fan club even named themselves ‘Taes Baes’.

“No, I haven’t had chance yet. I’ve been watching The Sinner, I’ve only got like two episodes left but I’ll check it out at some point! Alfonso Cuarón makes such good films; Gravity is still amazing and I’m still mind boggled at the sheer complexity of how that must have been to film with all the CGI they had to do but I feel like Roma looks a little more stripped down.”

Taehyung is nodding slowly, biting his lip almost absentmindedly as he listens to you. “Gravity is great, but you should definitely check out Children of Men. Much better, but Y Tu Mamá También is also phenomenal if you don’t mind the sexual scenes. But yeah, watch Roma. Definitely going to be a bit hit with the awards season and I can see him getting Best Director at the Oscars.”

“Really? It wouldn’t surprise me.” You muse, leaning back in your own chair and crossing your legs as you watch him now.

“Yep. And if he does win, then that’ll be his second Best Director win and it will also mean that Mexican directors have won five out of the last six. They’re killing the Oscars game lately. I still wish Barry Jenkins had won for Moonlight...way better than La La Land.” He sighs wistfully before nodding at your computer screen inquisitively, the beginnings of your latest blog post on the screen.

“Oh, I’m writing why I think Spider-Man: Into The Spider-Verse deserves the Best Animation at the Oscars. I liked The Incredibles and Ralph but if they win over the magnificence of Spider-Man then I will flip this table.” Pointing to your desk jokingly, Taehyung giggles sweetly.

Your desk has also changed over the last few months as well. A few cute Funko figures of your favourite Star Wars characters have popped up along with one or two more stylised figurines like your Xenomorph alien. Along with that, you’ve invested in some funky letter trays and pots to just bring some brightness to portray your personality a little more.

“I’ve not watched it yet. I know, feel free to pinch my arm. Hoseok has watched it though, he mentioned it the other day. Hey Hoseok, come here bro.” He calls out loudly, turning slightly to watch for the quiet man who spends his days on the computer behind yours.

Slowly, and adorably you might add, Hoseok’s meek face peers around the side of both his and your monitors as he stares owlishly at Taehyung beneath those outdated glasses. You’d say they were ugly, and they were, but he seemed to pull them off.

His hair is hidden today beneath a sand coloured beanie, leaving his entire face exposed and you coo softly at his tiny folded ears. It wasn’t something you’d noticed till Jimin had one day pointed over to the video editor, whispering words of adoration to you as he stared a little moon-eyed and lamented how his own ears didn’t look that cute.

It was beyond endearing, along with the slight pout his lips were pursed in. He probably hadn’t been listening to your conversation and so had no idea what was going on.

You’d noticed that Hoseok either kept an earphone in at all times or covered them with over-ear headphones when he wanted to work hard and not be disturbed. He certainly wasn’t rude but he definitely didn’t seem to be hugely confident in making conversations with people.

That didn’t stop people from trying to include him though, and you got the definite sense that everyone in the office adored Jung Hoseok and simultaneously wanted to hug him and protect him. You certainly did, and you were quite pleased that no one bullied him.

He, unfortunately, had the demeanour that would attract the attention of assholes but Seokjin and Namjoon ran a tight ship here. You did kind of wish that he got included in more outside events though.

“S-sorry. W-wh-what?” His voice is soft, the perfect mix of deep and high as he stutters out a response to Taehyung. The long sleeved shirt he’s wearing is almost salmon pink and has some generic looking cartoon on the front. It looks warm, and you find yourself lamenting the fact that you hadn’t brought a cardigan with you today.

“Spider-Man, the new one. You said to Jungkook that you’d watched it right?” There’s a moment of hesitation as Hoseok’s eyes flick to you before he’s nodding slowly. Almost immediately you grin brightly, not noticing the way that Hoseok pauses with his breath caught before his shoulders shift up to his ears.

“Oh my god, wasn’t it so good? The animation is just beautiful, it makes me want to scream. Like those cityscape shots? Could easily be mistaken for a photo if you just showed someone it. And the perfect blending of the different art styles of the Spider-People and god the music was so good. Miles is amazing and if it doesn’t win then I’m gonna Hulk out,” You pause and look at Taehyung who’s smirking in amusement. “Seriously, I don’t even know how to describe the animation. Think 3D...but not. You get me, right Hoseok?”

Hoseok’s eyes go astonishingly wide once more as you question and his mouth opens and closes a few times as he struggles to find an answer for you. He just settles for nodding quickly, reaching up to pull his beanie off and sort out his hair.

The chestnut locks have gone a bit wild under his hat and you have to bite your lip to stop laughing at how it goes all over the place, though another part of you wants to aww at how cute he looks.

“One day Hoseok, one day I’ll get you to spout poetic bullshit about a film you love.” You tease lightly, tapping at your gel wrist rest that lays alongside your keyboard to ease the pressure on your wrists as you type. He swallows audibly, causing you to laugh out loud while Taehyung chuckles and shakes his head.

“Hoseok has fucking terrible film taste. He thinks Batman v Superman was actually good.” Jungkook calls out and you turn to look at the graphic designer. He’s reclining in his chair, hands over his stomach with an ankle hooked over his knee while he observes the scene on the other side of the office.

Jimin is in the exact same position behind him while he nods his head sagely and you gasp in horror, a hand to your chest as you look back at Hoseok. “Say it isn’t so Hoseok.”

The man in question looks like he wants to sink through the floor as he gives a meagre shrug. Your wail of horror has him cringing while everyone else in the office sniggers and Taehyung pats your back in consolation.

“This can’t be. Why? Is it because your mom is named Martha too?” Jungkook lets out a bark of laughter at that while Jimin creases, folding over in his chair as his forehead rests against his knees from the force of his laugh.

Hoseok attempts to speak a few more times before he frowns deeply, taking a deep breath and shaking his head. “N-no. That was d-d-dumb. I just like Batman. I-i-it’s not my favourite f-f-film but it’s not terrible.”

You lean back and stare at him, raising a brow slowly as you narrow at your eyes at him. “What is your favourite film then?”

This is probably the most you’ve talked to Hoseok in the whole three months about non-job related work. You’re actually surprised he’s engaging this far, and you study him closely to make sure he doesn’t look uncomfortable or unhappy. The last thing you want is him to get upset.

But he doesn’t back down from your question, instead staring at something on his desk intently before looking back at you. You almost lean back in reaction, the intensity of his gaze far stronger than you’d expected and you’re surprised to feel a slight stirring of sexual lust for him. While you’d always acknowledge he was handsome - wasn’t everyone in this place? - you’d never quite seen Hoseok in a ‘oh holy cow’ light until right now.

“I-I-I don’t have one. B-b-but I like Jurassic Park and Blade Runner. And the Godfather. Oh, and Big Hero 6.” He adds as an afterthought, and you feel oddly proud that he didn’t stutter throughout the rest of the conversation. It was obviously just a nerves thing, but you kind of hope that he’ll get a bit bolder if you keep trying with him.

“Good choices. Solid. Not pretentious like the avant garde master here. He probably watches his porn in French black and white too.” A casual thumb thrown in Taehyung’s direction gets you the finger in response.

“It’s black and white softcore German, you heathen. No one does the group sex quite as good. The camera angles when there’s so many bodies.” He kisses the tips of his fingers before blowing them in the air, causing you to stare at him with a slightly grossed out face.

Looking at Jimin, you shake your head. “You know, I’ve only known the two of you for three months now. But I can easily see how you started dating. You with your weird music and books and Taehyung with your pretentious films.”

Taehyung gasps theatrically before smiling, fully aware that you’re joking around with him. Jimin on the other hand, snorts loudly and sticks his tongue out at you. “Hey, there’s nothing weird about my music choices. And what the hell. You’ve been listening to Billie Eilish non-stop lately according to your Spotify. And while she’s incredibly talented, I wish she’d lighten up a little.”

Turning to look at the cotton candy haired guy, though his hair was mostly hidden today by a black ball cap, you raise an eyebrow slowly. “Firstly, don’t insult Billie like that! Her songs are beautiful and soothe my soul. And also, this coming from the guy who listens to Morrissey. Unironically, I might add. Your opinion is invalid in this conversation.”

“...You know what. I can't even argue that. You right.” Jimin shrugs in defeat and sits back while Taehyung makes consoling noises at his boyfriend from his seat.

The delicate snort from behind your monitor makes your eyes widen, causing you to shift over slightly to watch Hoseok as he giggles. His white teeth peek out at you as he bites on his lower lip to try and contain his laugh.

And from how pretty and sweet it sounded, you wish he wouldn’t. The soft noises he lets out are oddly infectious, causing you to laugh in turn with a pretty dopey expression on your face and making you completely oblivious to the sly look Jimin and Taehyung are sharing.

“You love Imagine Dragons too, right? Hoseok listens to them all the time.” Taehyung says helpfully, gesturing with his chin towards the man behind your monitor.

Spinning back, you look at Hoseok with a happy grin and clap your hands together excitedly. “Oh my god, yes! I’m in love with Bad Liar right now, and Zero is so fun. I think Jimin keeps laughing at me for dancing in my seat.”

Hoseok doesn’t respond to you properly though, just nodding his head and smiling slightly as you playfully glare at the slim man across the office.

“On the subject of dating though...Hoseok. Have you ever had a girlfriend before? Or boyfriend, if that’s your thing.” Jimin asks, his tone not even slightly sly and you look at him in surprise. If he was trying to not be obvious, then he was being about as subtle as the Seattle Space Needle. Surely they’d already know this right?

As far as you’ve gathered, Jimin has been at Poppin’ Culture for four years and Taehyung for three. The two had started dating two years ago and despite your teasing, you were already confident that they were two of the cutest couples you’d ever seen.

Hoseok though, had apparently been with the company for years. He’d gone to college with Namjoon, Chaeyoung and Seokjin and had a film production degree. Namjoon had started Poppin’ Culture when he was 19, in his second year, and Hoseok had come on board once they’d branched out to a YouTube channel.

Still, you’re surprised by the way Hoseok’s cheeks go bright red and his eyes dart to you for a moment before he’s looking down at his desk once more. A wet tongue peeks out of his mouth quickly as he licks along his lips to wetten them, coughing to clear his throat before he’s looking back up at Jimin with a frown.

“Would you like the name of my e-e-ex-girlfriend? I’m s-s-socially awkward, not inept.” You suck your lower lip between your teeth as you look at Jimin with a ‘wtf’ look. As nice as he was, he was a bit blunt and you felt that situation could have probably done with a little more tactful handling. Hoseok looked like he could fry an egg on his cheeks and Jimin winces at the glare both Taehyung and you give him.

“Sorry man. I was out of line. I didn’t mean to insult you.” The apology is sincere in tone, with Jimin ducking his head and turning back to his work. You watch carefully as Hoseok eyes the younger man before letting out a quiet sigh and nodding his acceptance.

The atmosphere is slightly awkward now, and you’re desperate to make Hoseok less uncomfortable which is why you find yourself blurting out words you immediately want to swallow back up. “If it makes you feel any better, I’ve not had a boyfriend since I was 20 and I’ve not been laid in four years.”

Almost immediately your hand is slapping over your mouth as your eyes widen in horror, apologies falling from your lips like honey as your cheeks burn with embarrassment.

Not only are Hoseok’s eyes resembling dinner plates, his jaw dropped open in shock, but so is just about everyone else’s in the office. Well, that’s certainly one way to make him feel better about himself you guess.

“I’m sorry for your loss. Everyone, we need to be careful with her. She’s going through some tough times. Only 26 and already looking at a life of non-sexual fulfilment.” Taehyung drones deeply, his voice faux-sincere and you glare at him while pushing his hand off your shoulder.

“I will delete your folder of obscure foreign films.” You hiss at him through narrowed eyes, causing him to burst out into laughter as his hand slaps his thigh in amusement.

“Oh god, you crack me up. I need to thank Seokjin for hiring you, seriously. God, get on with your Spider-Man boner before you accidentally reveal something else way too intimate for the workplace to know.” He snorts before rolling back to his own desk. The office thankfully goes back to normal after that, the low level of chatter competing with the soft sounds of today’s playlist.

Looking at your screen, you’re distracted momentarily by the sight of Hoseok still in view just around your monitor. He’s looking at you in that way people do when they’ve checked out, their brains focused on something else entirely and you watch him back in amusement until he realises.

Almost immediately he cringes, bowing his head slightly and giving an uncomfortable smile before sliding back out of view. Smiling, you shake your head and pop your headphones back into your ears as you get back to work.

You’re oddly pleased to see Hoseok stand up for himself bluntly, and you remind yourself not to baby him. He’s a grown man after all, older than you.

The flashing of your phone lets you see that you’ve got a new notification from Facebook, and you roll your eyes as you click on your screen to see what it is. What you see however has you slowly smiling as a flutter of butterflies take flight in your stomach and you tap accept eagerly.

You have a new friend request: Jung Hoseok

The next few weeks roll by quickly with Taehyung and you becoming inundated with awards season nominations, ceremonies and just general Oscar bait films. It had even resulted in a whole ‘Top 10 Oscar Bait Films’ video on the Poppin’ Culture Film YouTube channel which had proven remarkably popular, even spawning a sequel that was generated purely from user comments.

You’re actually surprised with just how much you continue to love your job, even with the sheer pressure of blog and video deadlines constantly breathing down your neck. And it doesn’t take you long to realise that it’s because of the people you work with who make working that overtime all the more sweeter.

Jimin is genuinely hilarious and when paired up with Jungkook he becomes hysterical. Lisa has easily become your female work best friend, with the two of you Skyping all the time on your work computers and soon venturing out into the world to go to dinners, concerts and the cinema while Taehyung is an incredibly hard working colleague who always keeps a close on eye on how you’re doing.

It’s genuinely one of the best places you’ve ever worked and you thank all your lucky stars that you’d been accepted because you were pretty sure that you were making some of the closest friends you could.

And then there was Hoseok.

Jung Hoseok still remained a mystery to you and you weren’t entirely sure why you so desperately wanted to figure him out. Or maybe not figure him out, because you kind of liked how shy and mysterious he is.

The rest of your colleagues have been pretty open books and you were pretty sure that you were on the verge of receiving daily updates on Jimin and Taehyung’s sex life - you were that close with the two. But you still knew almost nothing about Hoseok and it drove you wild.

What was even more annoying was the fact that only you were apparently bothered by it too. The others just shrugged and said that he’d always been quiet and introverted, so they just made it clear to him that they were there if he wanted to talk or make friends with them. Apparently he never went out on the workplace socials and he rarely talked to others via text or Skype.

Which kind of infuriated you, because it probably was true that Hoseok preferred to be alone and lost in his world of music. But there must be something horribly isolating about never getting invited to things or never being included, which is why you kept trying to include him in your own conversations. The others would sometimes talk around him, but you always tried to make sure that he felt comfortable and included in your conversations.

Taehyung had honestly admitted in a meeting that he wasn’t entirely sure why you kept asking Hoseok things, pointing out that you might be annoying him. But you’d countered with the fact that you always gave Hoseok plenty of options to slip out of the conversation, yet he would continue it on sometimes.

It had been then that Taehyung had flushed a pretty golden pink, nodding his head as he acknowledged the fact that Hoseok had opened up more in the last few months of you being here than in the years he’d been here. That on its own had made your heart hurt. No one could enjoy being so easily disregarded, no matter how quiet and introverted.

Currently though, you were slouched on your couch with your best friend, Sunmi, as you both ate pepperoni pizza while watching Avengers: Infinity War for the bajillionth time. You, because you just loved the film, and her because she really loved Chris Hemsworth.

Honestly? Mood.

“I swear, this is the most badass entry scene of any entry scene in all of film,” You blurt out randomly, lifting your fist as Thor appears on screen in the middle of the battlefield and shouting out alongside him. “Bring. Me. Thanos!”

Sunmi snorts elegantly from your side, taking a bite of greasy pizza and chewing slowly while she eyes up her fictional man with pleasure. A hum of delight leaves her when Thor meets up with Captain America and you laugh, poking at her side.

“Imagine being in a Chris sandwich.” She looks at you and wiggles her carefully put together eyebrows before giggling.

“I wish. God, they can wreck me any day. You know, I can’t believe that you get to watch stuff like this and then write about it or make a video about it. Why can’t I just laze around and do that? Do they have an opening for me?” She pouts at you, placing the crust back in the box before wrapping her hands around your wrist and playfully whining.

You laugh loudly and take a bite of your own slice. “For what? Sorry Elle Woods, but you’re going to have keep your bending and snapping for the judge and jury. I doubt Poppin’ Culture - The Law Version will be very popular.”

“What about if I wear a hot pink bikini?” She says seriously, her face carefully blank as you give her a droll stare.

“Yeah sure, lemme give PornHub a call. I’m sure they’ve got a whole audience just waiting for their law lectures from Bikini Girl 3.” Sunmi shrieks with laughter at that, rolling backwards until her head is hitting the arm of the sofa and relaxing into the pile of cushions there.

Reaching her foot up, she prods at your thigh annoyingly until you push her away with a sigh.

“So, how is your work though? You’ve been spending a lot of time there. Which, by the way, is ridiculous. I only spend extra time doing work if I’m getting paid for it because I do not enjoy my job that much.” Sunmi sighs heavily, letting her arms fall behind her head as she turns her gaze back to your large television screen.

“Okay firstly, it was your decision to take a law degree. Your parents are assholes but they’re not dickish. They would have been fine with you being a doctor instead. Secondly, you make so much money an hour that you shouldn’t complain. You can literally buy a pair of Jimmy Choos with an hour.” Closing the pizza box, you lean forward and place it onto your wooden coffee table before leaning back and patting your stomach affectionately.

“Firstly you bitchass, I don’t make a lot because I’m still not fully qualified yet. It costs a lot to be a lawyer and the work is boring because I’m in property law. Yawn. Secondly, I hate property law but I would’ve passed out being a doctor. Blood and snot? No thanks. Maybe I should just give it all up and go back to college to become an artist.” She says dreamily and you look over at her with a raised brow.

“Do it. If it’s what you want. Your life shouldn’t be made on a decision you did based on what your parents wanted for you, as much as you might want to make them happy. They’re not your life, and you’ll burn out quicker if you do something you hate.” Sunmi just hums before shifting the pillows until she’s looking at you.

“Still. It’s nice that you’re enjoying it. I’m happy for you. I need to meet this Lisa, so you better set up a playdate or something. If she’s banging, I may just bang her. I mean, if you’re alright with that. And she likes girls.” Sunmi wiggles her brow and you laugh, shaking your head slowly.

“I think Lisa swings both ways honestly, so go for it. She’s pretty and cute with a really nice and fun personality. I wish I could introduce you to Jimin and Taehyung as well. They’re funny individually but hilarious together. Urgh, I wish I had someone the way Jimin eyefucks Tae across the room.”

“Does he realise you can see that?” She asks, an incredulous look on her face and you nod with a laugh.

“Oh yeah. He just gives me an innocent smile. They’re fun though and make me laugh, it’s like a family.” You sigh softly, slumping down further into the couch pillow. Sunmi’s quiet for a few seconds before speaking again.

“What about that quiet guy? Hoseok right?” Pausing, you chew on your lip as you stare blankly at the screen and wonder how to describe him to her.

“Hoseok...is sweet. Quiet but sweet. He doesn’t get involved in conversations of his own accord still, but I include him and he’ll get more involved now. We even have whole conversations just him and I, particularly about our love of 80s films though they’re not very long conversations. It’s nice, I’m literally watching him become more integrated and it’s kind of annoying that everyone just let him stagnate in his isolation. Like, seriously. Did no one ever think that maybe he doesn’t get involved because people have let him isolate himself? It’s hard to pull yourself out of that, and he’s obviously trying.” You don’t even realise you’re half ranting until you see Sunmi’s bemused smile, causing your cheeks to heat.

“Anyway, yeah. He’s a lot more caring than people think too. He just doesn’t show it in ways that you or I would, nor does he talk about them. Like...the other week I came in one morning to find a tube of dissolvable vitamin C tablets on my desk. When I asked where they’d come from, Hoseok Skyped me and said that he thought I looked like I was lacking a bit of vitamin C and to take one with water every day. And then when I was feeling a bit tired, he made me a cup of green tea. I swear Sunmi, he was so sweet and adorable because he kept stumbling over his words while telling me that green tea was healthy and rejuvenating but he didn’t like the taste so he always has peppermint and he hoped I liked peppermint too.”

Sunmi says nothing for a moment and you look at her in confusion, wondering why she’s suddenly decided to be quiet. It’s not like her to not get involved in your conversations, only she’s staring at you with wide eyes and a pretty mouth that’s fallen open.

“Oh my god. You like him.” Her words cause you to pause, frowning immediately as you shake your head in denial.

“What? No I don’t. I mean, yeah as a friend. Or I hope as a friend, but not anything more than that.” She lets out a peal of high pitched laughter while sitting up, looking closely at your face with those mahogany eyes of hers.

“Yes, you do. Oh my god, he is not even remotely your type from the sounds of it yet you’re falling hard girl. Show me a picture of him.” You want to keep denying her, mind spinning from what she’s come out with as you wonder where she’s got this impression from.

But once Sunmi has made up her mind, then it’s game over for everyone else. Sure enough, you find yourself scrolling through your phone on Facebook to find a nice picture of him to show her. And as you look through his, admittedly few, profile pictures, you pause for a moment as you realise that maybe she’s right.

Only people who like someone try and find the best looking picture of them, too afraid that their friend or family member will laugh and think their crush ugly. The swooping sensation in your stomach is confusing, and you don’t know whether it’s shy excitement or just plain old nausea.

Finally deciding on a picture of Hoseok that has obviously been taken in a coffee shop, you turn the phone screen so she can see. It’s got dim lighting, and has looks to have been taken on a Polaroid style camera from the style of it but he looks good.

In fact, he looks beautiful and his bright smile kind of takes your breath away.

He’s just wearing a plain white, long sleeved shirt with dark brown hair parted in the centre, the strands laying carelessly on his forehead while those beautiful chocolate eyes stare out from behind the lenses of his glasses. The table blocks anymore view of him and yet you can’t help but feel the fluttering in your stomach slowly spread along your veins.

Hoseok’s smiles are still rare, but they’ve slowly been becoming more frequent as you continue to talk to him. And every time you think he should smile more often, because he has a face that’s made for a smile.

His mouth is stretched wide with perfectly white, straight teeth showing and the force of the expression causes his eyes to narrow, soft tan cheeks looking adorably kissable.

Oh, you’re totally fucked.

“Holy shit…are you kidding me? This is Quiet Guy? Shy Guy? Holy fuck girl. He’s gorgeous! Look at that smile, oh my god. And he has such pretty eyes, that’s just not fair. Oh, please go for him. I know I said that he’s not your type because you normally like either those hipster guys or bad boys but he looks like he’d be so good for you. He looks kind, like you’d call him and say you’re sick and he comes right over to make you food and wraps you up in a blanket before cuddling with you, telling you that you need body heat to stay warm.” You look at her with a raised brow as she takes your phone and scrolls through his photos.

“And he obviously likes you.” Her words throw you then, causing you to frown as you stare before finally asking why she thinks.

“Because you said it yourself. He talks to you, even when he doesn’t talk to the others. You’ve said he keeps conversations going with you. He added you on Facebook first and he’s taking care of you in a weird but cute way of flirting. Like I said, he looks like he’d be a good boyfriend because he’s already trying to make sure you’re healthy and okay.”

She hands your phone back and points at the screen, where a new photo of Hoseok is. It’s not from his profile pictures, so you just presume it’s one that someone took of him and tagged him in. He’s asleep on his side on a couch, his right cheek smooshed into a pillow while his other looks soft and round. Pink lips pout in his sleep, the ends turned up while his lashes remain firmly closed and his hair is all over the place.

You have the strongest urge to reach through the screen to kiss his cheek.

“I think you should think on it, because I know you. And you’re probably having a little internal argument right now about whether or not you like him. But...if you decide that you do. Then I think you should go for it, because he looks nice. Get to know him a bit more, get him to open up his walls to you a bit more and then see if he really is interested. It’s been a while since you smiled like that about someone, and even longer since you searched through their pictures to find me the most flattering.” Dammit, you knew she’d figure you out.

You don’t respond though, simply locking your phone and placing it down on the cushion next to you as you both turn your attention back to the film. But you can’t help the what if’s that float around in the back of your mind, wondering if perhaps she’s right not only about yourself, but also him.

Did Hoseok like you?

Quite understandably, your interactions with Hoseok are suddenly tinged with a film of awkwardness as you contemplate the fact that you quite possibly like your shy colleague. And that’s to say nothing of how closely you watch his interactions with you to see if there’s a chance that he likes you in the way you like him.

Honestly, anyone would think you were 14 and not 26.

But he made you feel like a teenager though. The fluttering of nervous excitement in your stomach whenever he would look at you with that soft, bashful smile he’d give you whenever he caught your eye in the office. The way you would feel sad resentment when he was ill or was working from home and so didn’t come in.

How could you not though? Not only was he soul wrenchingly handsome and pretty, he was also thoughtful with the few conversations he would engage in and he was so sweet and kind.

When you’d complimented him on the peppermint green tea he’d brought you the other week, you found yourself with a mug being made every time he got up to go to the kitchen. You’d be completely absorbed in your work, staring at your screen intently with headphones in to keep distractions at bay, when you’d suddenly smell the pleasant scent of peppermint drifting to your nose.

And then you’d look to your side and see a fresh cup of tea sat there, steaming slowly in your Star Wars mug.

A quick glance behind your screen would let you see Hoseok staring firmly at his screen, refusing to look at you and yet his cheeks tinging a rosy glow that made your heart tug. It was only fair to respond in kind, and so you’d taken to making him a cup of your favourite tea as well, delicious salted caramel, and leaving it on his desk.

He hadn’t complained, so you took that as a sign that he enjoyed it too.

Maybe others would look at your interactions with laughter or bemusement, but you liked them. If he was flirting with you, because let’s face it you were flirting with him, then you were quietly excited and hopeful. You could cope with glacial, as long as it would hopefully result in something at the end.

Currently, you were attempting to film a video talking about the films that were snubbed completely at the Oscars. Taehyung had written up the script for you but was suffering from a winter cold at home. You’d claim man-flu, only you’d video called him and seen the dark circles under his eyes, sallow skin and bright red nose as he’d sniffled and snorted his way through your conversation.

As a result, you’d had to grab your emergency make-up kit from your drawer and rush to the bathroom to apply it. Today had been a lazy day; meaning you were just wearing a pair of ratty black jeans and an ancient Star Wars shirt that had once been black but was now an odd shade of grey.

Once you’d felt that you looked at the very least passable to the potentially thousands upon thousands of people who would be watching your face, you rush back through the office to place your kit back before heading over to the recording room. Tapping on the door lightly, you open it up to find Hoseok and Lisa inside as they set up the camera and lighting.

Already, the big ring lights are glaring and you’re feeling hot as you move over to the two, watching as they mess with the camera before checking over the computer on the desk next to it. Lisa moves around to the front, standing over the duct tape X on the floor and clipping the tiny microphone onto her shirt while waiting for Hoseok.

He’s wearing a plain white shirt today with a yellow and black check shirt open over the top and a plain pair of jeans. For some reason, he’s apparently decided to emulate Jungkook and is wearing some tan Timberland’s as well, though they surprisingly work well with the outfit.

You’ve noticed that Hoseok isn’t exactly the most fashionable person, but he’s yet to wear something that you find genuinely offensive. In fact, you often find that he manages to look hot even when he really shouldn’t. Maybe it’s just a talent attractive people have?

Hoseok gives a small nod to Lisa as his eyes flicker up from the screen, the light being reflected in his glasses. Lisa begins to talk random nonsense, performing a soundcheck to make sure the microphone is working properly while also making sure the camera’s fine.

Once done, she helps you to thread the microphone through your shirt and clip it on while placing the main pack into your back pocket. You stand on the X while going over the script that you can read on the screen reader facing you on the table.

Lisa slips away while you’re busy practicing, going through quick vocal exercises to warm your voice up as you continue to read over what you’re going to say. In your mind, you’re already visualising what the video will look like and you kind of feel sad that Taehyung can’t do this. It’s a good script.

“Okay. Are you ready?” Hoseok’s voice is soft and light, every word sounding like it has been cautiously thought of before he speaks it. You smile slightly as your head nods forward in response to him before clearing your throat and clenching your hands a few times while letting out a deep breath.

“Am I in the right place?” Looking down at the floor, you make sure that your feet are squarely on the spot and Hoseok looks through the camera before giving a cute okay symbol with a wink and pressed smile. It causes you to bite your own lower lip, desperately keeping inside the ‘cute’ that wants to escape.

“Okay, recording in three...two…” He stops speaking after that and mouths out the final one before pressing the button to record, a red light sparking to life on the camera and immediately you’re smiling brightly.

There’s no real pressure on you to do a good take in one shot, because Hoseok will be editing the scenes together and making some shorter to suit the video anyway. But you don’t really like wasting unnecessary hard drive space for him if possible. Plus, it just means he has to stare at your foolish facial expressions for longer and you’d really rather not.

On that note, it’s a little unfair that he gets to watch your face up close with a 4K camera. Actually, you’ve never thought about that before and almost immediately your brows crease at the thought of him seeing every pore and blemish on your skin. Christ, the camera does not do anyone justice and you want to whine at the thought of him seeing all your bad points in such harsh lighting.

When you don’t actually start speaking and instead start making a distressed face, Hoseok’s head peeks out from behind the monitor and he frowns at you in turn. Eyes focusing on his pretty visage, you have to squint slightly to see him properly from behind the astonishingly bright lights set up but you shake your head to reassure him.

Rolling your head on your shoulders and blowing bubbles with your lips, completely unaware of the tiny amused smile on Hoseok’s lips as he watches you through the monitor, you force yourself to get back into the zone.

The rest of the hour spent recording goes more or less like usual, with multiple outtakes when you mess things up and cause yourself to laugh. One of the hardest things of recording videos is just being able to being able to speak properly. You’ve had to learn to over-enunciate sometimes to avoid slurring your words together, because that just encourages hate from viewers.

And you are not in the mood to get hate. It’s already hard enough being a female commentator on the channel, and you’d had to grow some pretty thick skin in both the comments and on your own social media.

But there were plenty of equally great people too in fairness, and you’d even kind of got to know some regular viewers from the constant interactions you got both on your videos and on your own Twitter account. It was nice to have a mini fan club of people who were willing to defend you against the trolls and raise you up when you’re feeling down, though it’s not nearly as many as Taehyung’s extortionately big legion of fans.

There’s only a few major mishaps this time, with a few pronunciations of your words going horrifically bad and you find yourself cringing. Hoseok has a good chuckle on occasion and the bright bubbles of his laughter make you smile in turn, heart sparking with happiness at making him laugh.

Once Hoseok gave the signal to indicate that he was pretty happy with the recording, you let your shoulders drop while your head falls back on your shoulders, a deep groan leaving you as your entire body relaxes. Reaching to pull the microphone and its pack from under your shirt, you move over to Hoseok as he turns the light and camera off before he’s checking over the computer to transfer the new video files to his solid state drive.

“Did everything look good in it?” You ask, leaning your hip against the desk while your arms cross over your chest. Hoseok pauses for a moment at your close proximity before looking up at you slowly, his beautiful brown eyes looking sweetly innocent and big as he takes you in.

It’s still ridiculously endearing how shy he gets around you, but what you like even more is how it’s only when he’s not doing work related things. The last hour has been spent with him practically bossing you around, barking out polite requests when you’ve moved out of frame or have said something wrong.

He wasn’t mean about it or anything, he just took his job very seriously and it’s what made him such a damn good videographer and video editor. He knew what he needed and wasn’t afraid to tell people what to do in regards to that, so the sudden reversal back into the meek Hoseok tugged at your heart.

“Y-yeah. You did good. Less bad shots today.” You pout at him theatrically before pushing lightly at his shoulder, just enough to make him rock where he stands.

“Hey! There’s no need to be mean. You make it sound like I’m as bad Yugyeom! I don’t mess up that bad.” Lower lip sticking out, you look down at the floor until Hoseok lets out a soft and breathy laugh, shaking his head while adjusting his glasses slightly.

“I-I didn’t mean-. I’m not saying anything else,” He looks at you and gives you a wry smile. “I-I’m not stupid. I think I’ve dug enough of my own grave here.”

You can’t help but laugh out at that as you lean forward, body moving of its own accord before you move around him and rest your hand on his shoulder. It’s warm and solid beneath your palm, even through the layers he’s wearing and you swallow in sudden awareness of the firmness of him.

He freezes in place subtly as well, the muscles under your fingers tensing a little as neither of you move for a moment. It’s the first time you’ve ever touched him, and neither of you really seem to know what to do.

Swallowing, you let out a chuckle that’s a little higher pitched than you perhaps intended but you try to make it sound as natural as you can. Even if you’re feeling a little overwhelmed now when your hand feels warm and bizarrely sweaty.

“Funny, you’re way funnier than I thought Hobi!” The nickname you’d overheard Seokjin calling him once slips out without meaning to and you cringe with gritted teeth behind his back, taking your hand off his shoulder to pinch your leg at your stupidity. “Well, I hope it goes well. Let me know if there’s anything you need from me or just when it’s done so I can look it over? Thanks and bye!”

You can’t stop how fast the words fall from your lips, a faucet stuck on full when what you really want is a vault so tight not even the crown jewels of England can get out of it. Giving him an awkward smile, you book it out of the recording room as quickly as you can and leave him alone.

In fact, you go so fast that you don’t get to see the way Hoseok watches after you with widened eyes of shock which soon melt into half-moons of unguarded happiness in the quiet room. His hand shakes as it moves up to press at the place your own hand had been, the skin feeling prickly underneath and his breath shakes as a hesitant smile slowly paints its way on his face.

You don’t see that, nor do you see the way he pauses on a close up of your face with a fond smile before closing the programme down and leaving.

1K notes · View notes

dextervexter · 4 years

Text

god it really wasn’t as bad as it could have been but it certainly wasn’t the best. I will say it was definitely no where near as horny as everyone is making it out to be.

so first of all, I’m opening with I’m not gonna talk about the ENTIRE movie but just some parts of it but there will definitely be spoilers

I was right about a LOT of stuff going in, like Macavity whisking away a lot of the contenders for rebirth so he could be chosen. I was also right about Taylor Swift not being in the movie for more than five minutes, I was right about Tugger not having a massive role, I was right about Grizabella being given a past with Macavity, and I was right about the dancing being fuckin bad

I was also unfortunately right about Jenny eating her cockroaches and I literally could not look at the screen during her whole number I was so upset I felt so trapped The Gumbie Cat Number Is A Fucking Hostage Situation

H o w e v e r -wheeze-

Over all, it was Cats. It was a really REALLY weird take on Cats, but it was consistent with the stage play save for some changes with characters and pacing. Hooper clearly watched multiple versions of the play to try and get the vision he liked the best. He understood that this would be difficult, and he did what he could to try and get this weird ass musical on screen. There are parts of it I liked, there are parts of it I didn’t care for, and there were parts I astral projected to get away from. But if you go see this movie, you will be seeing Cats as it was when it first arrive on Westend in 1981. Original arrangements of the songs are used as well, for example, Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer is sung as the jazzy and insidious number from the OLC rather than the bouncy and fun 98 version. I don’t think it’s awful but it’s definitely not what younger fans are familiar with.

I think the only issue with the musical arrangements I have was the singing because Hooper once again insisted on having everyone sing live and it really hinders a lot of talented people. Often times I found myself wondering if these people were capable of singing in the slightest. But I think that’s just bad choices on Hooper’s part.

Let’s talk about the Good:

The best part of the film is definitely Skimbleshanks, and not just because he fucks and later kills a man with his supreme tap skills. The visuals are great, this is the only part with actual good dancing, and Steven Macrea has fantastic energy. Skimbleshanks is already one of my favorite numbers in the stage musical, and they get pretty creative with this. It was one of the moments in the movie where I could say for sure I was REALLY having a good time.

Also Les Twins were absolutely a treat to watch. They were funny, talented, clearly having a ton of fun, and played off each other as though they weren’t in a movie, they were just goofing around like real siblings do. I found myself actually missing them when they weren’t on screen

Robbie Fairchild does a decent Munkustrap and has some fun exchanges with the other characters. I also thought Jason Derulo did a wonderful job as Tugger despite not being in the film a lot. He’s self centered, clearly caught up in his own world, and is so obsessed with himself he doesn’t really flirt with anyone or focus a lot on Victoria for too long because he’s just so in love with himself and what he wants. And honestly that is basically just tugger.

The visuals are also really nice. The sets and practical effects help the movie feel more real and bring a great sense of life to this world that is happening right under the human one. The whole movie has this lovely, dream like quality to it, and it helped remind everyone we weren’t supposed to take it so seriously.

There were also a moment with Munkustrap that I thought was really cute, where Jenny complains she’s just as good as Tugger because she can break dance too. You hear Munkustrap chuckle and say “oh yeah? show me.” in a really playful way and it was adorable, even if it resulted in me seeing Rebel Wilson pop and lock,

Lastly, and this is a big one I know a lot of fans were angry about: Misto is implied to like victoria, but it’s never stated that they end up together. Actually a lot of their interactions can be interpreted as Just Friends Being Pals. It’s definitely not as big of a problem as a lot of people were making it out to be, but it’s just not interesting and doesn’t really matter to the plot.

I liked more of it than I was expecting, especially the little shout outs to Eliot’s original drafts of the poems. I’m seeing it again tomorrow with friends so I’ll probably post more about the things I missed (i seriously missed a lot of the gumbie cat number because i was too horrified to look so maybe i will be braver this time)

NOW THE BAD!!!

This is literally the worst fucking Macavity ever and Idris Elba had every right to be as piss drunk as he was at the premier. In fact I’m pretty sure he was drunk for a majority of the film. It’s very clear he is not having a good time, he is not enjoying the story, and he doesn’t want to be there. Granted, I’m willing to place a lot of the blame on Hooper’s take on the story, which required Macavity to be a greater presence, but a lot of what we see is a clowning, pathetic, loser who is throwing a tantrum because he isn’t getting his way and he’s very very naked for most of it. His last moments in the film were so laughable, so embarrassing, and so unbelievably desperate that I could barely watch. There is no dignity in Elba’s performance, and nothing mysterious or threatening about him. It’s not just 2019 Macavity that hurts this movie though, it’s how Macavity changes a massive part of the story with his nonsense, but I’m saving that for last because it’s a big one and I hate it!

Victoria is basically really bland. There was absolutely no reason to try and make this from her perspective. Like Webber and Hooper say they wanted her to serve as the character we see the world through but she’s bland, uninteresting, and just very boring. I understand their reasoning for making her the lead, as Victoria is a very recognizable character and easy to follow in dark lighting and crowded dancing, but she just simply exists to stare in wonder and ask questions that are answered in songs that she will stare in wonder over. If they wanted to have the audience experience the world through a character they probably should have gone with Munkustrap or something considering he’s narrating a majority of the film and knows what’s going on and can explain things a little better. He’s also a stronger character. Victoria is boasted to be this strong but shy little thing who approaches this new world with curiosity and hope and she’s really not. She doesn’t really get the chance to do or say anything that would help with the plot. she barely speaks to anyone but munk or misto, and it is very much a downgrade from her stage counterpart. Frankie Hayward is a very pretty dancer, but she’s not given much to work with and I found myself not caring in the slightest what she was up to.

This also leads into Beautiful Ghosts, which I posted about before so I’ll just leave this here and move on because I’ve said all I can say and I have more important things to talk about regarding Grizabella. to summarize, I was right and the song sucked.

The dancing is lamentable mess as well. God I sometimes forgot they were dancing. They are moving, but it’s not dancing. I would say only Les Twins and Jaih Bote were the clear dancers because they were pretty much the only ones allowed to put their own personal spins on the choreography. I’ve said it so many times and I will say it again Andy Blankenbluer is a fucking awful choreographer. His work is claustrophobic and ugly to look at. You lose the person in the movement but in the sense that you really don’t care if you see them again. Blankenbluer has stated so many times he feels as though audiences don’t have the attention spans for long dances sequences anymore and want more than one thing to see, but for the love of god could you give us something to look at? The dances are quick, ugly, and the moves are put down before they can make a good impression. He has no understanding of how to define a character through movement, which makes telling everyone apart very difficult, especially since the designs are already so unrecognizale. His work was atrocious in the 2016 Cats Revival, but at least he had Gillian Lynne’s original choreography to lean on. Without the backing of better choreographers, his work is downright forgettable.

Now the Big One, the inexcusable and awful part that I hate hate hate: Grizabella.

God I was rooting for her we were all rooting for her. Remember how in the 98 film she’s this broken down, cast aside, character barely hanging by a thread? Yeah in this she not only is given a throw away past where she chooses to side with Macavity for some unknown reason, but she’s chosen as a last resort. Yeah. Remember how I said Macavity’s plot paves the way for the mishandling of a beloved and tragic character. This is it. After Macavity steals literally everyone who is competing for rebirth, after Old D is returned, the Jellicles realize they have no one to choose from for rebirth. Victoria goes outside, brings Grizabella in, they sing memory, and she gets chosen. It is framed in a way that the cats all realize how badly she has it, but oh my god does it come off as heartless, careless and pis aller. Old D has no interaction with Grizabella until this point. The Jellicles don’t really interact with her unless to shoo her away. She is basically a background character for the whole movie. Giving her a past with Macavity was pointless. It never comes up. Macavity never sees her in the film. It’s never stated why she chose him or what she did with him. There is not a shred of dignity in Hudson’s performance, and I fully attribute that to Hooper making all his actors sing on set. Grizabella comes off as pitiable, but not enough to want to see her be reborn. It was downright heartless.

OVERALL!!

I give this movie a 6/10 stars. When they are doing Cats, it’s pretty enjoyable. Not everything I wanted, and some things I genuinely didn’t fucking ask for, but overall it is not as big of a problem as I thought it was going to be. I think if you’re apprehensive or angry about the film, I think you should give it a watch and you’ll either like it or you won’t.

you should definitely not expect the 98 version, because no version will ever be that perfect, but go in with an open mind and give it a chance.

#cats #cats 2019 #cats movie #probably the only horn dog scene #was when munk was high out of his mind #and writhing on the table like he was getting rawed to kingdom come #that was certainly a scene i watched with my eyes #and enjoyed

22 notes · View notes

sheewolf85 · 5 years

Text

A New Kind of Love

Summary: Sequel/Prequel to "The Best Daddy", set during the pregnancy. Based on a Discord conversation between myself and Keelywolfe. Stretch notices Edge is displaying some signs of possibly changing his mind about having this baby.

Notes: In my first oneshot with Cyperus, I left it up to the audience to decide how the little babybones came into the world. I've changed things up a bit for this one because I wanted to go a bit deeper.

Also, this isn't supposed to be set in the BAON universe. Maybe a BAON AU or something if Keely's okay with that, but I certainly don't want anyone thinking that I'm stealing Keelywolfe's universe. Nope.

Read it on AO3 here.

Or keep reading under the cut:

When the topic of children first came up, Stretch was hesitant to say he’d ever want to be a parent. Scratch that, he was downright positive that he never wanted kids.

Edge hadn’t questioned him for a reason, hadn’t seemed upset or disappointed in the least; he’d only accepted that Stretch that didn’t want that.

The truth was that he was certain he’d mess a kid up. Mentally, emotionally, psychologically, and all the other -ally’s. He was sick so often that he’d just make the kid worry about him, and it was bad enough that Edge had to worry about him all the damn time. He had trouble with commitment, and yeah he planned on committing to Edge for a while but that was different. Edge didn’t depend on him the way a kid would.

Their relationship hadn’t been new at the time, but they both still bore the title of boyfriend.

A few years later, after they’d been through so much together, gotten engaged and then married, after loving and laughing and arguing and getting back together, Stretch realized his opinion on children had changed.

Edge had brought it up a few times, never to harass or to beg, only to check in. He still never pushed or questioned, only accepted whatever answer Stretch felt he could give at the time.

The day came when Stretch could honestly say he’d been thinking about it, and the look of pure joy on Edge’s face had pushed him from merely thinking about it to actively trying to get himself ready to be a parent.

Once the decision to bring a child into the world had been made, they had to figure out how they were going to do it. Stretch’s first thought was that he would be the one to carry the child since Edge worked full time and was the main breadwinner of the household. Sure Stretch had his own contributions, some of them pretty important in a long-term sense, but literally nobody outside of a few select skeletons and the king knew about those.

Edge brought logic to the table, gently reminding Stretch with sorrow in his sockets that his health may not support the full-term growth of a child. That started visits to doctors to learn as much as they could about skeleton reproduction.

In the end, it was Edge who would carry their child. Stretch couldn’t say that he wasn’t relieved, but there was also a part of him that was a little jealous. It didn’t help that he had to explain to what felt like a million different people that Edge wasn’t carrying because Stretch didn’t want to or was too lazy or selfish to do it himself, but rather because Edge’s magic was stable and his health impeccable, essentially the exact opposite of Stretch.

Jealousy faded, however, and by the fourth month when Edge started showing and had to get his suits tailored to accommodate a baby belly, Stretch was filled with nothing but awe and adoration for his husband.

One morning, just after the six month mark, Stretch woke up to Edge grumbling about his routine being ripped out from under him.

Stretch opened his sockets to see Edge standing in an adjusted running outfit in front of the closet, pointing at his belly as he mumbled some stern admonishment or another.

“you okay, babe?” Stretch asked, his voice thick with sleep.

Edge turned around and smiled, his outward level of irritation dropping from a grumble to a tight smile. “Yes, love. I’ve just discovered this morning that running is a bit more difficult than it used to be.” He huffed and walked over to the bed to sit on the side of it. “And by that I mean I ended up gagging by the side of the road halfway through my route. This child is likely to take after you; running makes them nauseous.”

Stretch grinned up at his handsome hubby, reaching to take his hand. “i’m sorry they’re not cooperating with your routine, babe.”

Edge nodded, then lifted their clasped hands to kiss Stretch’s knuckles. “First my coffee, and now this. The things I do for my family.”

Family.

Such a simple word to some, but it meant more to Stretch now than he could have ever dreamed.

“maybe you just need to slow down or not run so many miles? or maybe we should go talk to alphys if you think--”

“It was just a little nausea, love; everything is fine. I’ll give it a few days and try again, but I’ll go slower like you suggested.” He leaned down that time, catching Stretch’s mouth in a lovely kiss. “Do you want to go back to sleep, or do you want to get up and have some breakfast with me?”

The temptation to go back to sleep was there, but he passed it over for the opportunity to spend a little extra time with his baby. Well...his husband and his baby. Yeah, that wasn’t going to get confusing or anything. They were both his babies, just different kinds. A baby within a baby.

He kept his snicker to himself as he got up and followed Edge to the shower.

-------------------------------

As the next two months passed, Stretch began to notice things.

At first, he was pretty sure he was imagining it all. He was projecting his own previous fears of being a parent onto Edge. That was all.

Surely Edge was just tired when Alphys showed them the screen with the image of their child’s growing frame and their little pulsing soul. He wasn’t bored, and he wasn’t disinterested. He was tired. Alphys had even scolded him a little, saying he needed to get some more rest; their baby was half Stretch, after all.

During the first few months of the pregnancy, Edge was definitely the more excited of the two of them. Not that Stretch wasn’t, it was just that Edge had wanted this for so long and now that it was here, he was celebrating with all the cheer he knew how to show.

But now, Stretch was seeing something else in Edge’s demeanor when he talked to people about their baby. He really wanted to believe it was a combination of many things, not the least of which being that Edge had grown accustomed to being pregnant and no longer felt the need to show off his excitement. People knew he was happy to soon be a father. He didn’t need to show it all the time.

Something else started to eat at Stretch, however, as he watched Edge talking to someone he worked with at the embassy. They were at the market, and Stretch had wandered off as he usually did. Making his way back, he stopped to watch. He couldn’t say why. Maybe it was because he suddenly realized just how exhausted Edge looked. Or maybe it was because of the way he gestured toward his belly, as if he resented the thing. Then again, it could have been the expression of discontent on his face; he honestly looked like he’d rather be anywhere but here.

“Is everything okay?” a voice asked beside him.

Stretch looked over to see Jennie, a young Bun monster with a newborn of her own cradled in her arms, standing beside him.

“uh, yeah, i think so. why?” He looked back at Edge. Damn, he had never seen Edge so done with everything.

Jennie smiled tightly, like she knew something but didn’t want to say it. “Just...he doesn’t look very happy, does he?” She sighed and looked down at her little one. “Having a baby changes you, y’know? You have to make so many sacrifices. I know I shouldn’t say this, but if I could go back I would have waited. Or maybe I’d never have kids at all.”

For one delirious moment, Stretch didn’t understand. And then it hit him.

Regret.

He looked at Edge again, and so many little expressions and actions all fell into place.

Was Edge having second thoughts? Had he changed his mind about being a dad? Or maybe about having kids with Stretch?

They had both done everything they could to make sure that Stretch’s shitty health couldn’t hurt their baby, but there had already been so many things that Edge had to change because the baby was half Stretch. He’d had to give up so much more than he’d anticipated, and certainly if he’d had another partner he could have let them carry the child instead.

He said goodbye to Jennie and went up to Edge. He didn’t know what he was going to say or how he was going to bring any of this up, but he knew he’d have to.

And yet, the moment Edge saw him, his entire demeanor changed. His posture straightened, his mouth turned up in the secret smile that Stretch loved so much, and even his eye lights brightened a bit. He still looked tired, but everything else melted away.

No, that was wrong. It wasn’t gone, it was hidden. Edge was hiding it from him.

Edge didn’t hide things. Not from Stretch. Not from anyone, really, especially not his annoyance. His pleasure and his happiness were reserved for those closest to him, but he wore his irritation like a badge of honor.

To see him hiding now was just another kick in the chest. Edge didn’t want to hurt him, and so was pretending that everything was fine while inside he was probably searching frantically for a way out of this.

By the time they made it home that evening, Stretch had convinced himself that Edge regretted every part of their relationship. If he’d only chosen another partner, he could be happy. If he hadn’t talked Stretch into having a child, maybe they’d still be okay.

In Stretch’s mind, there were only two possible outcomes to this scenario:

The first, Edge lived the rest of his life resenting both Stretch and their child for everything he had to give up. He would choose to stay, because he wouldn’t break a promise he’d made to Stretch, but every day would be miserable for him. In turn, both Stretch and their child would be miserable as well. Stretch would end up fulfilling the prophecy he’d made ages ago when he said he’d screw a kid up, because no kid could be happy in a home where one of their parents regretted their existence.

The second possible outcome, Edge would pack up and leave after the baby was born. He might take the kid with him or he might leave Stretch to raise them on his own. That part wasn’t clear, but either way, Stretch couldn’t bear the thought of losing his husband.

He scoffed to himself. Either way, really, he’d end up losing Edge.

“Love?”

Edge’s voice brought him out of his thoughts, and Stretch looked over to see him standing next to the couch. Stretch was sitting there, had been staring numbly at the coffee table.

“hey babe,” he managed. His voice was tight. Had he been crying?

Edge sat next to him and draped a blanket over his shoulders. “Can I do anything?” he asked, gingerly rubbing Stretch’s back as he did. “Do you need anything?”

I need you, he thought.

He didn’t bother hiding it. “i need you,” he said out loud, his voice catching.

Nodding, Edge pulled Stretch a bit closer. Gone were the days of sitting on his husband’s lap; his baby belly was too large and they didn’t want to risk hurting the kid. His arms wrapped around Stretch nonetheless and pulled him back to lay against his shoulder.

“I’m here,” he said softly.

Stretch turned as best he could, curled his legs up to sling them over Edge’s lap, and nuzzled his face into Edge’s neck. He knew he needed to ask Edge what was wrong. He needed to stop pretending that he knew what was going on in anyone else’s mind but his own, but all the clues were right there and he was so terrified to hear Edge confirm them.

“I love you,” Edge said quietly, his hands still massaging gently. “So much.”

He could almost hear the ‘but’ coming, and for a moment he was worried he might throw up. He wasn’t ready for this. Not yet. He wanted a little more time to pretend they could have the perfect future before it all fell apart.

He turned into Edge’s shoulder and pressed his face into the soft shirt there, forcing himself to breathe in and out slowly so he didn’t start hyperventilating. He clung to his husband in a desperate attempt to make everything okay. Wasn’t there supposed to be some kind of power of love bullshit to fix everything?

“i love you, too.” His voice was strangled, barely a breath, and it unleashed a new torrent of tears to his sockets. His soul was breaking, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. “i love you so much, edge, please...please don’t leave me.”

Edge’s arms constricted, holding him too tightly. “Of course not; I could never leave you.” He pressed a kiss to Stretch’s skull. “Never.”

Stretch held onto that, nodding into Edge’s shoulder and let himself be comforted by the one who probably needed the comfort instead.

Could he be more selfish?

He couldn’t say how much time had passed. Minutes, hours, it didn’t really matter. It wasn’t long enough to feel like he was going to be okay when Edge pulled back, his arms loosening.

“Are you hungry at all?” he asked.

Stretch shook his head. He felt like he might vomit if he tried to eat anything.

“you probably are, though, huh?” he asked, forcing himself to lean back and look at Edge.

He didn’t try to hide it. Nodding, he said, “Being pregnant has certainly affected my appetite. I can’t skip meals anymore.”

Skipping meals in the first place wasn’t the best thing they could do, but they were both guilty of it. Edge was probably better at eating when he should than Stretch simply because of his upbringing, but that didn’t mean he had to be happy about the change.

He sucked in a breath and let Edge slip away from him, tucked his legs up under himself and wrapped the blanket more securely around his shoulders as he listened to Edge moving around in the kitchen.

When Edge came back, he had a plate with two sandwiches cut into squares and what would probably qualify as a fruit salad piled beside them.

“i’m sorry,” Stretch said mournfully.

“For what?” Edge asked, his tone betraying his honest surprise at the apology. “It’s hardly your fault that I’m hungry.”

Oh, but it was. Well, it was at least half his fault. Probably.

He couldn’t say that. Edge would abandon his food to comfort him again, and Stretch couldn’t bear that guilt. Instead, he kept himself quiet as he watched Edge eat.

Edge didn’t turn on the TV. Instead, he sat beside Stretch in silence and occasionally reached out stroke a gloved hand gently along his blanket-covered arms or to pat lovingly at his knees. He made a point to offer a bite of something every so often, a strawberry or a piece of sandwich, even a juicy chunk of fresh plum. Stretch declined every time.

Once he was finished eating, Edge went back to the kitchen to wash up. It wasn’t long before he appeared back at the side of the couch.

“Are you tired, love?” he asked, stroking his fingers gently over Stretch’s skull.

He was, he realized. He was extremely tired from everything, and all he wanted to do was go to sleep so he could wake up to a second chance and do it right that time. He wanted to ensure Edge’s happiness.

Instead of saying any of that, he just nodded and stood up. Edge took the blanket and folded it in half before draping it across the back of the couch. He then took Stretch’s hand and led the way up the stairs to their bedroom.

In the first few weeks after Edge started to show, they’d started a tradition of spending a few moments each night talking to their baby. They’d lay down together, often after making love, and Stretch would watch with growing fascination as Edge’s fingers grazed over his bright crimson magic. He would reach out and touch, sometimes twining their fingers together as they talked about possibilities and made plans.

Stretch felt so dumb tonight as he slipped into bed and realized they hadn’t done that in almost two weeks. The last few times that they had done it, Edge had seemed too tired to say or do much, but Stretch had chalked it up to Edge actually being tired.

He watched as Edge changed into his pajamas, then walked over and slid into bed beside him. He half expected his husband to roll over and go to sleep without so much as a goodnight kiss, but Edge surprised him by wrapping his arms around him and pulling him close.

“Stretch...You know you can talk to me, don’t you? About anything, any time?” Edge pressed a kiss to his forehead. “That hasn’t changed. That will never change.”

It was his not-so-subtle way of asking what was wrong. Stretch didn’t know what to say. Whatever reasons Edge had for hiding his feelings would disappear the moment Stretch brought it up, and they’d both be forced to face choices they probably weren’t ready to make yet. At least, Stretch wasn’t ready. He didn’t want to think about how much Edge secretly wanted to leave.

“Love?”

As Edge’s arms tightened around him, he realized he was shaking again.

“You know I won’t force you to talk to me. You know that normally I would wait until you’re ready to speak, if you choose to speak at all.” He was silent for a moment, and Stretch could tell he was only choosing his next words carefully.

“But something is telling me that this isn’t your typical episode. I can’t explain it, love, but...please tell me what I can do to help you.”

“i don’t know,” Stretch finally confessed. “i love you so much, edge. you know that, right?”

Edge’s hands began gently stroking him, petting and massaging at his spine and shoulders. “Of course I know that, Stretch,” he said gently. “And I love you, too. Can you tell me what’s wrong?”

Stretch sucked in a deep breath. He truly wasn’t ready for this, but he supposed his time was up. Instead of pulling away, however, he cuddled as close as he could and made sure to press a loving kiss to his husband’s mouth before he said anything. Edge returned the kiss, deepening it briefly.

“i saw you today. the you that you’re hiding from me.”

Edge’s brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”

Feeling like he was going to lose his tender grip on stability, Stretch once again pulled in a deep breath. “i mean i saw how you looked like you regret every life choice you’ve made since we decided to have a kid.”

He half expected Edge to deny it or to pretend he didn’t know what Stretch was talking about. Instead, he was silent, his eyelights downcast as if staring at Stretch’s chest.

“babe, i understand if--”

“No,” Edge interrupted. “You don’t understand. You can’t possibly understand, and I’ve been terrible at communicating with you.” He looked up then, and Stretch’s soul only felt worse at the look of fear in Edges’ eye lights.

“please don’t leave me,” he begged. “whatever it is, we can work through it, right?”

He knew he was only delaying the inevitable, but he couldn’t help it. He loved Edge so, so much, and now he loved that baby, too, and he couldn’t give either one of them up.

Edge pulled him up close, his arms tightening almost painfully. “I’m not going to leave you,” he whispered against his skull. “I love you, Stretch, and I’m not going anywhere.”

For a long, silent moment, they just held each other in the darkness of their room. Edge pressed soft kisses to the side of Stretch’s skull, and in turn Stretch nuzzled his face against Edge’s shoulder.

“I’m...scared,” Edge finally confessed, his voice a whisper. “I’m scared of something I never once considered until it was too late.”

Stretch nodded and looked up enough to meet Edge’s eyes. “what are you scared of?”

Edge drew in a slow breath before speaking, his words hesitant. “I love you, you know that. I love you more than I ever dared dream possible.”

“yeah? that’s good, though, right?”

“Yes, that’s good. Growing up in Underfell...love like this didn’t exist there. Not between lovers, and I’ve seen parents sell their children to make ends meet. When you and I first got together, when I first realized that I loved you, I never dared hope that I could love you this deeply. But Stretch…”

He went silent again, his eyes closed tightly and his arms tightening once again.

“what is it, edge?” Stretch couldn’t keep the worry out of his voice if he tried.

“I’ve seen how parents love their children here, in this universe.” Edge voice was tight. Stretch knew that if he could, he’d be crying. “When I thought about having children, my thoughts were more on the things I could teach them, how I could help them to learn and grow into happy, healthy adults. I didn’t think about...Stretch, how am I going to love them? Children need more than guidance and steady care. I understand that now.”

For a moment, Stretch’s mind simply couldn’t wrap around this new information. Couldn’t adapt to this new perspective.

“They’re going to have love, I know that. You and Blue, probably even Sans and Papyrus. But what kind of life are they going to live when they realize that only one of their parents can genuinely love them?”

“edge…” Stretch wasn’t sure what to say for a minute. “baby, i…”

“I know,” Edge said lamely. “I know, and this is my fault. I’m so sorry, love.”

Stretch reached up to cup the side of his husband’s face, his thumb tracing carefully over his sharp teeth.

“baby, no. don’t be sorry; there’s nothing you need to apologize for. it’s gonna be okay.”

Edge blinked, his brow furrowing. “You’re not angry?”

“why would i be?”

“Because I talked you into having a child you didn’t even want only to tell you that I can’t love them.”

And right then, Stretch’s soul shattered. He understood so much more now, and the tears building in his sockets were as much for his husband as they were for himself.

“oh, edge, no…” He leaned in and kissed Edge, putting all of his love into it. Pulling back, he tried to smile. “it’s true that once upon a time i didn’t want kids. but i do now, and you didn’t talk me into wanting one either. being with you, loving you so much, changed my mind. i want this baby; i really do. but i want this baby with you. and...this is gonna take some time, i think, for you to see what i mean, but i think you’re wrong. i think you’re gonna be surprised by how much you love this kid.”

“But what if I can’t love them?”

Stretch’s smile became more genuine. “you can. even you have to admit that you’ll be able to love them a little bit.” He held up a hand, his thumb and forefinger held an inch apart. “and even if you do only love them a little bit, you also have to admit that you already care about them a lot. you’re right that kids need a bit more than just care and guidance, but let me tell you a thing about parents in this universe: they’re not perfect. no one is. but i have so much faith in you, edge. i know that you’re going to be a damn good parent.”

Edge nodded silently and hugged Stretch tightly again. Stretch wound his arms around Edge and held on, a little amazed at how the night had turned out so far.

“Thank you,” Edge whispered.

“always,” Stretch responded.

They snuggled closely for a while until Stretch’s sockets started drifting closed. He was out before Edge, falling asleep with the hope that Edge would feel better in the morning.

It appeared that Edge did feel better the next morning after their talk. After a few rounds of vigorous morning sex and a steamy shower, Edge was humming softly to himself as he made breakfast, lightly swinging his hips to whatever music was playing in his head.

Stretch had to admit he felt better, too. Both of their concerns had been unburied the night before, and Stretch knew all too well what it was like to live with a secret you felt like you couldn’t tell anyone. Even if Edge only ever told him about his concerns, at least he could vent them somehow.

-------------------------------

The last month of the pregnancy was spent preparing for the arrival of their baby.

They got the nursery all set up, Edge begrudgingly allowing both is brother and brother-in-law to pitch in when his stamina proved once again to be less than it used to be. Red mostly helped by misinterpreting the instructions of the furniture they were putting together while Blue did most of the actual work.

The closer the due date came, the more often Red would come by to check up. Stretch had to wonder what his thoughts were on loving his niece or nephew, but he never asked. It was honestly pretty evident in the way he insisted on triple checking that everything in the nursery was safe for a babybones. And then checking again for good measure.

Blue showed his love the way he usually did: by feeding Edge as often as he allowed it. Which, thanks to the baby taking up more and more of his energy, was turning out to be more often than Stretch would have guessed possible.

Sans and Papyrus also came by often to show their support and love for their family. Papyrus did a lot of the cleaning for Edge, a compromise he and Blue had come up with together, and Sans kept producing the most ridiculous baby outfits he could find.

Stretch was honestly pretty sure he was going to find the charred remnants of some of those outfits at the bottom of their fire pit in the backyard, but he figured Sans already knew that so he didn’t say anything.

When the day finally arrived, Stretch helped a hobbling Edge to the car and settled him in the backseat just as Red and Blue came out of a shortcut in the driveway. Blue shook his head to clear it, then walked up to Stretch and held out his hand. Stretch dropped the keys into his brother’s palm, then got into the car next to his husband.

Red and Blue had already been to war over who was going to drive Edge to the hospital. Stretch did feel bad that he couldn't do it, but Edge helped him get over it. Edge had also settled the driver debate, saying he’d much rather arrive safely and in one piece, therefore Blue was driving. Red had huffed and puffed, but ultimately agreed.

At the hospital, the process went quickly. Alphys was there to help out as well since skeleton pregnancies were not common and most doctors didn’t know what to expect with the actual birthing process.

Stretch held Edge’s hand, encouraged him and tried to help keep him calm with words of love and support.

And then his baby was there, all of his perfect little bones covered in Edge’s crimson magic. A quick scan of his soul showed a male predilection, so they wrapped him up in a little blue blanket before settling him in Edge’s arms.

“a baby boy,” Stretch cooed. They’d been waiting until he was born for the scan; they didn’t want to risk getting a mixed result through Edge’s magic. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to Edge’s sweaty forehead. “you did so good, babe.” He reached out and gently touched his baby’s tiny little skull. “he’s so precious.”

Edge nodded but didn’t say anything.

“Have you picked out a name?” one of the nurses asked.

Stretch smiled at Edge, who nodded. “Yes, his name is Cyperus.”

The nurse cooed. “That’s precious. He’s so cute. Are you about ready to let him get cleaned up?”

Edge paused for a moment before he nodded and reluctantly handed the baby back.

The doctors took the baby to clean him up and move Edge to a different room. As they moved, he took a second to text his brother that the birth went well and they could come see Cyperus now.

Red and Blue had both been certain that they would be the first uncle to hold the baby, but neither wanted to concede that there could only be one. Stretch was only a little nervous as they came into the room, expecting more arguing over baby-holding rights.

Instead, it seemed that they had worked themselves out. They both strode right up to the bed, but there was no snarling or growling.

“how’s the little ankle-biter?” Red asked, leaning over Edge with his hands in his pockets to get a better look. “aw, ain’t he cute?”

Blue held out his hands. “We decided that I get to hold him first.”

Edge raised a brow. “Is that so?”

Red nodded, and whatever Edge saw on his brother’s face seemed to take away all concern. His expression softened, and he carefully handed the baby bundle to Blue.

Both Red and Blue gushed over the tiny babybones for a while, then Red took his turn. Red held him awkwardly, and Stretch was impressed with the way he took direction from Blue. Despite Red having been the only one between the two with any actual baby-raising experience, it seemed Blue was the more experienced in recent baby-holding.

Eventually, Stretch was able to claim his baby back from his brothers. He held Cyperus gently, gave him a soft kiss on his little forehead, and marveled once again at how adorably perfect he was.

-------------------------------

Later that evening, laying in bed at home with Cyperus sleeping quietly between them, Edge let out a large sigh.

Stretch looked at him with a smile. “what is it?” he asked.

Edge smiled, so beautiful and content. “You were right.”

“about what?”

His mouth opened, but no answer came out. Instead, Edge clicked his mouth shut and sniffled. Despite that gorgeous smile, Stretch was worried.

“edge?”

“I didn’t think it was going to be possible, Stretch. I really didn’t. But I love him. I love him so much more than I can even say.”

Stretch immediately relaxed, his soul filling with gentle peace and overwhelming love at the same time. “i know what you mean. i loved him before he was born, but now? damn.”

Edge nodded. Neither of them said anything else. Instead, they laid together watching their baby sleep, hands clasped together.

In a while, they’d move Cyperus to his nursery and go to bed themselves, but for now, neither Daddy nor Papa could take their eyes off of their little miracle.

#my writing #spicyhoney #cyperus #a bit o' angst #hurt/comfort

34 notes · View notes

destiny-smasher · 5 years

Text

I used to be close friends with one of the composers for Steven Universe. I watched them rise from a YouTube remixer living in a cramped bedroom in a shared apartment with nothing but a mattress on the floor and a keyboard beside it to owning a house, happily married with a whole backyard garden and a cat because they found success working on one of the biggest cartoon shows I’ve known. But they broke off that friendship earlier this year and it’s made my biased love for Steven Universe become very difficult to grasp with. Understanding how and why we weren’t friends anymore was likewise difficult to grasp, even after hours of us trying to hash things out and resolve it. And while we DID resolve things amicably (I hope) and peacefully, it wasn’t until Steven Universe: The Movie that I was really able to feel like I could see the forest from the trees and ‘get’ what happened. This will be a kind of review of the movie, but mostly it became more of a personal ramble relating my real life experiences with Aivi to those of characters within SU, especially the antagonist of the Movie. This is lifted from this Twitter thread, so it was originally written stream of consciousness and I’m sharing it here to keep it more readable and archived. This is a bit of a read so tucking it behind a ‘read more.’

"You keep on turning pages for people who don't care about you And still it takes you ages to see that no one's there Everyone's gone on without you"

Time to finally talk about the #StevenUniverse Movie. Strap in 'cause this gon' get personal.

It should go without saying BUT I am gonna be talking about the movie! Dunno how in detail per se but I can't properly say what I wanna say without diving into some of the important plotty stuff. So yea.

Don't read this thread if ya don't want #spoilers #sumovie

First off, I wanna talk about what this movie does well. Going in, I had heard it was framed like a musical. And I wasn't sure how I felt about that idea, though it wasn't surprising. After all, the 'musical' style episodes tend to resonate quite a lot.

I think they work great when it's one song in a 10 minute episode, but an hour and a half of songs? I wasn't sure how well that would go. Turns out, pretty well. This is due to many factors but primarily the variety of song styles and art styles used throughout. Basically every scene has a primary song that drives it home, and basically all of them have a different genre/tone as well as visual presentation style. A lot of work went into getting it all to work together and feel cohesive. TBH for me personally the main highlight of the movie was honestly the animation. Average TV goers might just see "yup sure looks like a cartoon" but on the whole, on average, the movie is CLEARLY animated and framed with much more dynamism and detail than the majority of SU. Getting to see these characters we've gotten to know over the past few years a couple years in the future, generally at peace with things, but animated with more detail than ever, THAT is the true highlight of the film for me. Naturally, there was a lot of bits of comedy, often relying on knowledge of what the characters have been through, and I felt a lot of bittersweet smiles throughout as this felt like a good send off for Steven and his Space Moms. It managed to work in cameos from basically everyone you'd expect, some of which...didn't work out as well as others (specifically, the Diamonds bookending the movie was a bit forced and weird IMO but they ARE important to the lore even if I find them boring tbh) It was nice getting to 'catch up' with everyone, and the plot itself uses a generic 'gotta save the world again' thing (bleh) in a creative way, at least -- it all becomes an excuse to "re-live" the four primary heroes' stories through song. Cool enough. Something the movie inadvertently highlights, however, is the fact that SU as a series really started spinning its wheels a lot for its second half, in particular. Much has been said about how and why and why or not this doesn't matter, etc. etc. I was just along for the ride. I've repeatedly expressed my personal bias in the series' favor for a long time, and now? I kinda don't really have that personal bias anymore. I still love the show, I still think it's one of the best cartoons I've ever seen. But those rose-tinted glasses are off now. Taking said glasses off and actually listening to and looking up what critics of the show had to say kind of unearthed a bunch of things I had kept sweeping under the rug for the sake of personal bias/support of someone I loved and cared for a lot. We'll get back to that. I say all of this because the movie ironically failed to do much of anything NEW, something the series itself kind of struggled with for a while until it finally got around to the conclusion of Steven's story arc. The film ultimately kind of ends with "yeah Steven can change!" Which, um yea? Obviously. He's a completely different person than he was in S1. But he's kiiiiinda been the same person for....some while now. The weird irony of SU as a series is that about halfway through the narrative, the protag has essentially grown up, done. The last half or third or so of SU's narrative was basically Steven having to cheer everyone around him up and help them deal with their shit, and...kinda just going about that essentially the same way every time. The power of love, the friends we made along the way, etc. To be clear, there's nothing BAD about this, and in fact it's what sets Steven apart from most every other narrative of this type. The protag is almost always forced to change in ways they don't want, do things they don't want to do, etc. But when you put it side by side with something like Avatar or Gravity Falls, those series saw everyone growing alongside each other. There are clear arcs for everyone, almost all of which get resolved in ways fitting each character. It's imperfect but it's varied. SU has a tendency to just...hammer everyone's character flaws and arcs with ONE option: just love yourself and be nice, and everyyyyyyythinggggg 'll work out in the end! Which is fine, but when a story does it for so long, over and over, always the same, it gets a bit weird. I specifically LIKED in the film, at the end, that Steven actually does have to fight, because THAT is what Spinel needed to do. She needed to let out all of that anger, and that violence was her own way of doing it. 'you can't just sing a song to make everything go away' etc. It's typical, perhaps, for protagonists to have to tackle problems in different ways because that's LIFE. The fact is, Steven's approach will NOT save everyone. Lapis stilllll kinda stands as an example of this but an as of yet unresolved one. I liked that at the end of things, Spinel still doesn't come into the same fold as everyone else. Basically "sorry, I already fucked this up too much, I can't really deal with this," and that is IMPORTANT and I really liked it. Before really digging into the personal angle, I want to bring up how fascinating it is that the movie essentially had a real BUDGET and so they deliberately seemed to design an antagonist that would take full advantage of that animation budget. EASILY, by far, Spinel is the most interesting-to-watch antag in the whole series imo, in terms of how she moves and fights, etc. They really just wanted to flex and they did it, but like any SU antag there's (somewhat predictable) motives. This gets back at what I was saying before -- how the series spins its wheels a lot -- but Spinel's motivation/back story isssss kiiiinnndaaaa a lot like many many characters' issues and, like, I get it. We get it. Steven's Mom was Not The Best does that have to be the basis behind kinda EVERYONE who goes against Steven? Or the Gems? Lapis, Bismuth, and Peridot all offered more varied motivations, and even THEN, Bismuth was still essentially in the same boat? Anyway, I digress. I DO appreciate the way the series set up Rose as this wondrous lovely lady and has severely dissected and broken that down to the point where I really do not like Rose, in any of her ID's, as a character or a fictional person, and it did so gradually. A lot of what the movie did was kind of expected. Right? Songs, singing, check. Steven going about things the same way, check. Re-living/celebrating how far he and his moms have come, check. What I didn't expect was -- OK, well, there WAS that one fusion...which, um

But the actual thing that really latched onto me was how much I conncted with Spinel. As is the case with any story that has well presented characters, you can attach to SOME part of just about all of them. I associate most closely with Pearl overall but can relate with just about anyone prominent. I see parts of me and Jenny in Steven/Connie, in Ruby/Sapphire, in Peridot/Lapis. I see what kind of woman I might've become in Amethyst (and sometimes am). Spinel, though, is a really weird case because I see my adolescent self in her SO MUCH and yet fairly recent events in my life -- directly tied TO the show itself, mind you -- make that connection weirdly poignant and present. For some context, I used to be good friends with Aivi, one of the musicians who works on the series with their husband. Spring 2018, Aivi and I vocalized to each other that we considered one another one of the closest friends in each other's lives. We're no longer friends. To make sure this is clear, I think Aivi is a wonderful person, and our breaking apart wasn't violent or dramatic or anything, Aivi just...decided they weren't interested in the relationship anymore. And neglected to tell me this until like a year later. The context is of course not at ALL as severe or dramatic as Spinel/Pink, so please don't assume there's some one-to-one there. But OOF are there some harsh similarities and it really made Spinel's backstory sting in a very confusing way. I say 'confusing' because, as I mentioned, I see my adolescent self in Spinel. The way I was going about making friends matches her 'happy' self. The way I acted in my senior year of college matches her 'angry' self. There was no single person that created any of that, though. In high school, I was like Starfire, in college, I tried to nurture that, play to my strengths. I failed miserably. And what I feel is a big part of why is inherently tied to my transitioning (which is, still, something I feel I am failing miserably at). By the end of college I was more like Raven, and there I remained through the duration of my first long-term romance, into a very weird and atypical marriage and breakup, and then I moved to CA and started changing. Fittingly, my current self can't quite ID with any single Teen Titan. I'm not a teen anymore, after all. Throughout a lot of my friendship with Aivi, they really seemed to fixate on comparing me to Pearl. It sometimes made me uncomfortable the particular ways they did, though. I strongly identified with Pearl's flaws and strengths in personality (though we're obviously different people), and so seeing Pearl go through redemption via self-love and self-acceptance meant a lot to me. "It's Over, Isn't It?" I was IN THE ROOM listening to Aivi and their husband work on the chorus to that song. Obviously they couldn't talk about it but I knew damn well what it was about, and anticipated that piece for a long time. Now it's even more weirdly painful. I met Aivi because they made Mario arrangements they put on YouTube and they happened to live a few blocks away when I was subletting my first summer in CA. They seemed very kind and caring and eager to Be Nice and at the time I really needed that at a very vulnerable and fragile time in my life so I latched onto that. -In The Garden- The week when the LiS terfs freaked out on me and that Bad Spinel side of me lashed back, and I found myself suffering from being gaslit and facing the fact that the worst part of myself that Trigon in Raven's mind that Angry Spinel was still THERE was still ME It was too much For the first (and thankfully, only) time in my life, I experienced suicidal thoughts. And Aivi REACTED to that shit. Strongly. In a way no one ever had for me before, ever. They drove across the Bay to my house, picked me up, had me over, and helped me process it. And in the months to come, as I was healing and coming to terms with how That Worst Part of Me That I Wanted to BE RID OF was still THERE and apparently could just fucking show up, through all of that, Aivi helped me work through things, and we really bonded. In retrospect, though, it's SO damned hard for me to tell if Aivi and I became so close because of mutual respect or pity or just conditioned behavior to Be Nice and Keep Up Appearances. I dunno. What I know NOW is that apparently Cost More than I would've thought. I'm not Aivi so I don't want to really dig into 'dirt' (again, Aivi is a great person who works very hard and that's WHY their work is so good) but looking back, it's wild to see their progression into SUCCESS and fame while I just stood by, floundering The thing is, Aivi was a super busy person. We barely got to spend time together -- when we DID, it was a multi-hour affair and apart from like, Jenny, Aivi is prolly the person I've had the deepest, most vulnerable conversations with. They were next to me when I realized 'oh huh I'm maybe trans??' because they were there when I was at one of the lowest points in my life. I never ASKED them to be there, to Be So Nice and as it turns out, Being So Nice is harder than it looks. So to kind of loop this back to the movie, I wasn't some Skullgirls Peacock Cuphead grinny goof or anything like that but I AM WILLING to bet that from Aivi's POV the way Happy Spinel acts toward Steven is prolly how I felt in Aivi's life at points, at the least. The irony is that we would go weeks, months, barely interacting. But looking back, the way Aivi talked about things, the same phrase keeps dominating my mind: Aivi got bored of me. I wasn't 'useful' to them anymore. Aivi said that day in spring 2018 was like 'the climax' of our friendship, or something like that. Way they talked about it was like...the finale of a season of TV. Our character arc together was over. Even though we TALKED about it, came to mutual understandimng of The Logic behind Aivi's decision to cut ties, I don't think it ever REALLY made sense to me, how Aivi must've felt about our friendship, until Spinel. By spring of 2019, my role in Aivi's life -- from what they have told me, from what I can perceive -- was more like I existed in a separate space from the rest of their life. I was that one interesting person always waiting in The Garden for them to visit when they felt like it Because while Aivi had gotten BIG, gotten MARRIED, gotten a HOUSE, found legitimate SUCCESS in their creative field I was still poor still stuck in retail still unable to find an audience still unable to understand the pressures of Success And OOOOFFF in those last couple years, interacting became more and more strained for both of us, from opposite ends of things. Aivi had responsibilities, PEOPLE vying for their attention, people wanting to hire them, projects to complete, a house, a spouse, etc etc My life was (and kiiiinda still is?) nothing like that, and as our Mutual Creatives Struggling to MAKE THINGS and Get By transforming into Yep I Am Still Here but you are SUCCESSFUL I think that really put a lot of strain on things I never accepted until Spinel. After Aivi hit it big with SU, in particular, they gradually started...acting differently. Acting in ways that made less and less sense to me. They were a Diamond now. And I was still just what I was. When drawing comparisons to characters on the show, Aivi persistently compared me to Pearl. A fact I once took pride in. They repeatedly compared themself to Garnet. Which...always kind of didn't make sense to me. Aivi wasn't really like Garnet. They are more NOW, though? In the sense of how they act, I suppose. Specifically, one of the last things Aivi said to me was that trying to be friends with me had started feeling like Pearl trying to force Garnet to fuse with her. This was problematic because from my POV nothing of the sort was happening. All I was looking for was occasionally hanging out a few times a year. Like. Ya know. Actually a lot less than what I was looking for with basically all of my other friends. And that was still Too Much? But when I start looking at things like Pink Diamond and Spinel instead of Pearl and Garnet, somehow things make a lot more sense. I was probably too clingy, too exciteable, and what amusement or relief I could provide eventually stopped being useful. Aivi eventually didn't even want to spend time with friends to just...spend time with them. Everything had to have some kind of practical Purpose to it, it had to be contributing to a Goal. I still don't get that, tbh. But I'm also not A Diamond. I'm not Successful. The most responsibility I have right now is fucking hanging up the laundry to dry. I have college loans that have and continue to feel pointless to try and repay. I have severe dental problems I haven't been able to fix. My body fell out of shape because of retail hell, and what energy I’ve had to spare from that always ends up going into the people I love, and trying to keep Making Things. Let's not forget The Complications of coming out and wanting to transition but not possessing the resources to do so. (Aivi was actually super supportive of this btw and was the first person to make me feel comfortable wearing feminine things so yea) Anyway, the point I'm trying to make is that MY LIFE is not together. My personality is? I feel like I am finally Myself in terms of mental/emotional stability. And that is largely because Jenny helped me get there. But Aivi helped a lot with that, too. But I think Aivi got to a point where Success was more of a measure of how Grown Up and Healthy one was because despite my behavior, my personality, my mood, what I was asking for, and what I was giving, all changing DRASTICALLY after being with Jenny, I think Aivi still...looked at me the way Pink Diamond looked at Spinel during that song. Like, "yeeeaaaa ok kiddo it's time for me to go now, kinda done here" This is what's so confusing about all of this metaphor/etc. I'm not...like Spinel anymore? My current, post-coming-out self doesn't really relate with Happy OR Angry Spinel. It's almost like Aivi couldn't see me for who I became, and could only see me for who I had been. And maybe that's like why Spinel can't be friends with Steven at the end. It's too painful. I used to take pride in being associated with Pearl because "I'm enough" and "being strong in the REAL way" but now it's more like "oh you just think I'm still hung up and needy and clingy?" which uh don't feel so great a comparison. I can't help but wonder if while working on the movie, Aivi saw some of themself in Pink. Because I'm not the only person who apparently wasn't 'useful' to them anymore. And I'm not saying we should've kept forcing something that wasn't working. Not at all. What we had was good for both us, but it also entailed a lot of patience on my part and effort on theirs. And unlike any of my other long term friends, I often ended up waiting weeks, months, "Happily wondering night after night, Is this how it works? Am I doing it right?"

Years and years of broken friendships, one after the other, most lasting merely 6 months, MAYBE a year at most, with a handful that have lasted since middle school (but which are so much harder to maintain) took a toll on my Adult Self until Jenny, anyway. For quite a long time - the majority of my life, currently - I assumed I just was Too Different and that was why my friendships didn't seem to last, didn't seem to extend to the depths I was looking for. That's perhaps one critical difference between Spinel and I: she's looking for FUN, for smiling faces, for attention, for creating smiles, I just want some fucking consistency. At this point, I'm not even sure WHY I still reach out to people. I don't NEED friendships in that desperate way I used to, back in the Happy/Angry Spinel times. And I've come to terms with that Other Max part of myself and integrated it, accepted it. My worst parts are still me and instead of suppressing them (often by relying on bids of deep friendship with others) I just have to let them EXIST and let them do their thing once in a while. This is ALL why Celeste hit me as hard as it did. Because even if I'm not actually much like Spinel anymore, and Aivi's not really like Pink Diamond, even if I don't actually share much in common with Madeline (other than the subtle 'I drink sometimes to deal with my problems' thing, which I don't anymore) I still comprehend and resonate so much with that concept of just needing to accept the worst parts of yourself and work with them rather than trying to keep them caged up and then they escape and rampage every 5-10 years or so and ruin your life As I felt myself coming to all of these Good Feelings I FINALLY felt like I could help Aivi in the ways they had helped me. That I finally had something to offer I didn't before. Turns out, I didn't, apparently. Aivi had More Important Things to do than visit me in The Garden. And I couldn't blame them. Not a bit. Especially if they had gotten bored of visiting me. I didn't like feeling like a burden on them, either. Can't really argue with that. During the last time we talked, Aivi didn't use the WORDS, didn't literally say them, but I finally could see it: I wasn't Useful anymore. I couldn't Understand, either, because I wasn't Successful. Our friendship was rewarding, but because it required effort. And that effort was still worth it to me, but no longer to them. I was no longer worth it. And despite that, despite starting to feel those hunches, I spent those final months -- as had been the case before, they were afraid to hurt me so avoided actually confronting the problem -- I remained "Happy to listen, Happy to stay Happily watching her drift away" I have no idea if any aspect of our friendship impacted anything Aivi had worked on creatively. TBH Aivi seemed to approach even relationships themselves with more of a logical, pragmatic style -- it was entirely unique compared to anyone I had ever connected with. But if you've read @lis-allwounds then it might not surprise you to know that a lot of what I expressed through Stella and Max, as well as Other Max and Another Stella, channels a lot of these things. I even quoted Aivi directly in the story's end (perhaps foolishly optimistic) And yes, that epilogue moment of sorts is gonna be entirely different if I ever do finish the visual novel. The fact is that we were ALWAYS very different people and our friendship was weird and complicated and hard for one or both of us throughout its, what, 8 year duration? Ironically, I think I took away the opposite 'Character Arc Lesson' they did from all this. But that's just the thing, nothing is permanent for a Human Being. We aren't Gems, we don't actually fuse, we can't just change our appearances when we feel like it, or project ourselves to look how we want to look, or exist for thousands of years. But we DO all have different needs, different ways of understanding those needs, and different ways of needing to adjust or change ourselves or our environments in order to pursue what we want to pursue with the limited time we have here. We tried, hard, and it lasted long enough. If I'm not useful, I'm not useful, I guess? I don't have any ill will toward Aivi, I loved them as a friend and I know they loved me, too, and were better at showing it than most any friends I ever have had. If I'd been better at reciprocating in ways that were actually useful, that would've been good -- but then maybe we wouldn't have become friends in the first place if I hadn't needed 'saving' in the first place, I don't fuckin' know. And I hope my saying all of these things doesn't make anyone think any less of Aivi because your relationship with them is, very likely, not at all personal like mine is. And you know as well as I do how good they are at what they do. Aivi took the time to ease me out of things. Aivi did NOT suddenly up and vanish for thousands of years. While the dynamics of the situation might bare sharp points of similarity, Aivi is not like Pink Diamond and I'm not like Spinel -- not in the present, anyway. Stories help us because they share THREADS with reality but it's always important to recognize those threads for what they are and not confuse them for ropes. And me ranting and tossing all of this out there is something part of me has wanted to do for months but needed to take the time to grieve and process and accept. And maybe it's selfish to be posting all of this, I don't know. But it helps me accept myself and them a lot more. "Finally something finally news about how the story ends" Aivi likely has brand new friends, better ones than me, and I'm willing to bet some of them worked on this movie. And it turned out pretty good, all things considered, probably in part because Aivi was able to focus on it That person I became friends with, she doesn't exist anymore. Just like how who I used to be when Aivi first me, he doesn't exist anymore, either. We both changed, and grew in opposite directions, I guess. We've found happiness and growth and relief in different ways. In the end the Movie helped me come to terms with all of this in a way Angry Spinel younger me couldn't have still hurts yo

"Isn't that lovely?

Isn't that cool?

Isn't that cruel?

And aren't I a fool

to have happily listened,

happy to stay,

happily watching her drift away"

#Steven Universe The Movie #Spinel #Personal #SU #SU Spinel

13 notes · View notes

mazqueen · 5 years

Note

The writers confuse me so much because as someone who is neutral Jane/raf are not written as a good couple at all. There seems to be a lot of immaturity with raf sending mateo to the door himself and turning in the opposite direction when he saw jane. Then jane is just ignoring all his wishes and not respecting that he wants space. I know Jennie is not meaning for it to come across like it because she is hardcore jafael but this ep showed how a healthy relationship should be 1/2

2/2 with petramos. I got scared when it looked like petra was breaking up with jr before trying to get the twins to understand and was really happy with how the scene went. Especially compared to how jane/raf were unaware of how mateo was struggling which again showed how great a mother petra is and yet she doesn’t get the credit she deserves.

I mean, just talking about this context, and not anything else, I don’t really get the issue particularly with Raf sending Mateo to the door by himself (I’m gonna assume he didn’t make Mateo cross the street by himself or anything like that, obviously) or turning the opposite direction when he saw Jane BECAUSE of the fact that Jane has been stalking him, pretty much. And if he doesn’t blatantly go out of his way to avoid her… let’s be real. Jane would’ve taken the first chance she got to be all over him bc when she sets her mind on something… we know how she can be, which I think Raf has made clear he doesn’t want. So taking that into consideration, it actually makes sense. So it’s really more of, if Jane was actually properly giving him space (ex. him dropping Mateo off can just be as simple as that) then I don’t think he would’ve felt the need to avoid her to that extent.

That said, I agree with the overall sentiment in that the writers still could be doing SO much better when it comes to Jafael. And I mean I still have my issues with them (ie. not acknowledging the shit Raf did the last few episodes), but I’ve also accepted the writers will never address them so I’m just trying to chill out and focus on the good stuff because being upset is exhaustinggg, I’m spent lmfao

With Petra, I kind of assumed offscreen Petra would’ve explained to the twins that JR wasn’t a bad guy, but even with that I don’t think it’s really that simple. Sometimes you can understand something but your emotions are completely different, you know? Kind of like, if you have trauma, you can be in a completely safe space and still get triggered, and you’re just scared even though you know you’re in a safe space? I kind of feel like it’s maybe something like that with the twins.

As for not knowing, I mean I’d say Petra didn’t know the twins were struggling either til the camera caught them so I don’t wanna be completely unfair… but also yeah. Mateo’s struggle was probably more easily noticeable since it’s something that could’ve been observed while doing homework, etc? IDk. Sometimes people just miss things because they’re human and idt that automatically makes you a bad parent. And I mean the twins frown every time JR is in the room, idk if Petra just thought they don’t like her? If she ever asked them about it? It’s kinda weird, lmao and if I’m gonna look for loopholes, there are so many of them :)) Honestly I feel like the writers just didn’t have much time for kids’ storylines until last episode because everything was about the triangle so they just decided, oh we’ll do it later and we’ll just throw in some excuse. And Jane wasn’t perfect this episode, as a mother, but I kind of like that she isn’t because the show always frames Jane as the superior mother over Petra and idk. It’s nice that she’s also flawed, and I like that she had to take Alba’s advice in the end (about trying to change her kid). No one gets everything right all the time. And yeah, it’s nice that they put Petra in a great light as a mother too because the show does tend to frame her as the lesser mother sometimes too, so. Idk, it’s not perfect but I don’t have a large issue with it as a whole.

You’re right in saying Petra doesn’t nearly get enough credit for being such a wonderful mother though. That’s 500% true, lol.

#ask: jane the virgin #ask #jtv spoilers #Anonymous #long post for ts

4 notes · View notes

sarimaposthumous · 5 years

Text

The High Priestess Chapter 2

TITLE: The High Priestess CHAPTER NUMBER: 2/? AUTHOR: SarimaPosthumous GENRE: Supernatural FIC SUMMARY: Jenny is an OC set in the Supernatural universe. She has owned a bar called the High Priestess for nine years and has managed to carve out her own niche in the hunting world. Everything changes when the two notorious hunters show up in her life after she’s managed to avoid them. RATING: M (Violence) WARNINGS: Slight Season 14 Spoilers AUTHORS NOTES: Flashbacks take place around Season 5, however, it mostly takes place in the present. There is collaboration between @spnjediavenger in our fics as our Original Characters cross paths from time to time. Please provide feedback!

Chapter 1

“Elliana!” I exclaimed as she ran passed Sam and Dean Winchester to give me a hug. “You’ve certainly changed,” I gently grabbed her arm and pulled her towards the back. She looked behind her and shook her head so Sam and Dean wouldn’t follow us. I pulled her into my office as they settled at the bar. “Look Elliana, I am glad you’re here, but I had asked you not to bring the Winchesters.”

Ellie closed her eyes and let out a sigh before responding. "I know, I’m sorry. But with everything that’s been happening the past couple years, they weren’t exactly taking 'no' for an answer!” she said with exasperation tracing her features. "I really do love them, but their protectiveness really gets annoying sometimes," she continued.

I too let out a sigh and motioned for her to sit down as I sat down next to her. “It’s okay, I’m not upset with you. They were bound to find out about this place one way or another.” I paused, “So what brings you guys here? Is it the whole Michael situation?”

A small smile tugged at her lips. "Yeah the Winchesters are a bit hard to avoid these days," she laughed lightly. "But yes. It seems like everything we do and everything we try, we come up with nothing. And we know you have a big hunter network."

I ran my fingers through my long hair. “Well, I haven’t heard anything about him through grapevine...at least not since he left Dean. All I know is that there are monsters gathering and waiting for him to return.” I paused to look at Elianna. I could tell that the mere mention of Michael and Dean had made her uneasy. It was evident that it was a rough time for her.

It had been around 9 years since I had last seen her, and she’s certainly matured since then. She was only 13 and had already been on a few hunts when we first officially met. A year prior to this she came across the High Priestess scrawny as ever before Shane had passed, but Shane could not convince her to stay. She only returned when she thought the Winchesters abandoned her. So, she set out and continued hunting until she came across the High Priestess where I informed her that Sam and Dean were looking for her. Elliana stayed for a few days to decide whether or not she would try to find them. I tried convincing her otherwise considering they had just gotten Ellen and Jo killed while hunting Lucifer, but she was stubborn and went to find them anyway.

Looking at her now, her tall figure became a bit more muscular from nearly a decade of hunting. She was anxiously fidgeting with the keychain she keeps hooked to her belt loop. I vaguely recalled her seeing her with it when we first met. Bags had formed under her eyes from the current struggles she and the Winchesters were dealing with, but her dark brown eyes still had that small spark in them. This made me hopeful that she was keeping the bright side in mind and hope that things will turn around. She still kept her dark brown hair cut short to frame her face.

“Frankly, I’m surprised you’re still alive and made it this far with them,” I joked knowing full well she more than capable of taking care of herself.

Ellie smiled at this comment. “The Winchesters may get caught in some pretty crazy shit – I’ll give you that. But it’s only because they try to do what’s right,” she replied, glancing fondly towards the door. “But I don’t think I’d be alive if I didn’t go with them. I’m sure Shane must have told you I had some marks on my head too…” her last sentence hung in the air for a bit as she remembered the circumstances that had brought her into hunting all those years ago. She lowered her eyes for a moment before snapping her attention back to me. “They sure attract trouble sometimes, but damn do I love them. They, Cas, and Jack are my family,” she continued with a loving smile.

I nodded. “That’s a fair point, I’m just glad you’re still alive. Let’s go see what they’re up to.” I followed Elliana out of the office and we found the Winchesters playing pool. “Sam and Dean Winchester. I see you’ve finally found this place.” I signaled to Elise to bring two more beers for myself and Elliana.

Sam looked at me, his eyebrows furrowed quizzically. “I just don’t understand how we haven’t heard of this place yet.”

Raising a brow, I retorted “perhaps you’re not as smart as you think you are.” I had to keep myself from laughing at Dean’s incredulous expression. Waving my hand, I smiled. “I’m kidding! Honestly, I’ve gone out of my way to ensure this place stays off your radar.”

“What did we do to you?” Dean asked, slightly offended.

“Well, it’s because the Winchesters have a tendency to get any hunter who works with them killed. Hell, my predecessor Shane lived solely because he didn’t go on that hunting trip with your father and Bill Harvelle. So, I’ve asked any hunters or patrons in general to avoid talking about this place if they run into you.” Elise arrived with the beers and I handed one to Ellianna. “How much have you told them about this place, Ellianna?” I asked before taking a sip.

She politely refused the beer, so Dean took it from Elise. Ellie looked at me and said, “Thanks, but I don’t drink.”

“I still don’t know how we get along,” Dean joked, smirking at her and nudging her elbow causing her to roll my eyes and turned back to me. “Honestly, I haven’t told them too much. I knew you and Shane wanted to keep it under wraps so I was just vague up till now. When I mentioned how I came into the life, I didsay I got some help from the owner of a bar, but I didn’t specify anything else,” she shrugged.

“Wait,” Sam interjected. “That was thisplace?”

Ellie nodded, “Shane and Jenny helped me a lot in the beginning. Even though I didn’t stick around for long.”

“I know you don’t exactly have a high opinion of us,” Sam said as he turned to me. “But thank you for being there for Ellie. I’m grateful she had someone to trust in the beginning,” he finished, throwing a loving, brotherly smile towards Elliana.

I nodded at Sam and raised my beer before taking another sip.

“So, Jenny, how did you and Shane get into the hunting business?” Dean asked. “Same as anyone else,” I shrugged my shoulders. The trio looked at me expectantly. “...Tragedy.” They continued to stare. Sighing, I signaled for them to follow me to a table in the back corner. As we settled in, Elise brought Ellie some water.

Clearing my throat I explained how some demons targeted my family and Shane saved me, but one of them escaped. Then that same demon came and killed Shane. He left the business to me and I revamped it by turning the entire bar into a safe room. “Don’t let the rustic, wooden panels fool you, underneath it all is solid iron and salt. It’s also completely warded so that any supernatural creature that comes in here is powerless save for their physical strength.”

Dean whistled, and Sam looked impressed. “How did you afford all of this?” Dean asked. “I also trade and procure priceless artifacts...as long as no one gets hurt other than the buyer who knows and accepts all of the risks,” I said. “And of course, Bobby helped me plan this,” I mentioned.

This surprised Sam and Dean. “I’m still surprised we haven’t run into you or heard of you,” Sam said. I looked over at Ellie and she remained quiet. She and I both knew it wasn’t our place to discuss Shane’s misfortunes, so I changed the subject. “As for why you’re here, “I continued, “I haven’t heard anything new about Michael. Just that his monsters are waiting for him to return.” This unsettled the Winchesters. “Is that the only reason you’re in town or is there something else?”

"That was most of it," Ellie spoke up. "We were picking up a couple cases with Jack since we haven’t been able to do anything about Michael. But now we're gonna hang around Cleveland for a few days because I finally convinced everyone to take a break for once – especially Jack. He works too hard trying to prove himself. It’s about time he had some fun.”

Sam and Dean smirked at Ellie’s mention of Jack eliciting an annoyed huff from her before she continued. “Seriously, I swear you guys are 5 years old!” She replied exasperated as she rolled her eyes before taking a drink of the water that was set in front of her.

I laughed at Ellie’s increasingly red cheeks as she stared at her water. It was getting later in the night, and the patrons were dwindling. “Well if you’re going to stay in town you are welcome to stay here if not, you’re welcome anytime.”

“No, we should be getting back to the motel, I’m sure Jack misses Ellie. God forbid they stay apart too long,” Dean smirked. I couldn’t help but let out a laugh.

“Thank you for your hospitality,” Sam said as I exchanged numbers with the three of them.

“Also, let me know if you need help with a hunt. Either I can pitch in or I can send someone else,” I conceded.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Dean winked at me as I rolled my eyes at his impish grin.

The trio headed out the door, but Sam paused before exiting. “Actually, as I’m sure you’ve heard, we’re missing Nick. You haven’t heard from him at all have you?” I paused before shaking my head. “Well if you hear from him can you give us a holler?” I nodded in response and watched them leave the bar.

Letting out a sigh, I walked back to my office as Padma yelled out the last call. The truth was I had seen Nick and knew what he was doing as I had been helping him. But he was adamant that I not disclose his whereabouts to the Winchesters, so I respected his wishes. Little did I know, he was on his way.

#supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fandom #dean winchester #sam winchester #lucifer #nick #luciifer/nick #the high priestess #original character #spn #spnfanfic #spnfanfiction #sam winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fanfiction #winchester #the family business #winchesters

4 notes · View notes

sulietsexual · 7 years

Note

LOVED your take on The Freshman, amazing meta as usual and I agree it's such an underrated episode. I can't believe you didn't mention the umbrella though! Also... since you were going to do Becoming... is it too much to ask for it now? I know I'm greedy... :)

ShortOpinion: Noother ship will ever tear me apart the way Bangel does

LongOpinion: BeforeThe Gift came along and stole my heart, Becoming was my favourite seasonfinale, and my favourite episode of BtVS. There is so much to love about thisdouble episode, as it so beautifully showcases Buffy becoming the Slayer, Angelbecoming a vampire and Buffy becoming strong enough to defeat Angel. Bringingthe Angelus arc to a close, while exploring themes of identity, destiny andself-preservation, Becoming is everything a season finale should be and playsthe emotional angle for all its worth.

While I understand how and whysome fans find Angel first seeing Buffy when she is so young creepy andunsettling, I also understand what the writers were trying to portray, showingAngel at his lowest and most desolate and demonstrating how, even before sheknew him, Buffy gave him hope enough to turn his life around, to become a partof something bigger. Whistler sending Angel to Buffy was never supposed to comeacross as stalkery (which it unfortunately does, to a certain extent – althoughnot the extent some fans try to make it out to be) but rather, was supposedshow that Angel sees more to Buffy than she sees in herself, and that heempathises with her loneliness and isolation (a running theme in Buffy andAngel’s relationship).

In the present day, we see Buffyand Willow finally discover the floppy disk (omg, BtVS really showsits age sometimes) containing the spell to re-ensoul Angel and Buffy makes thedecision to have Willow perform the spell. I want to take a moment to talkabout this decision, as I have long wanted to talk about the good oldSpike-fandom argument about Angelus having his soul forced upon him vs Spikeseeking his soul. No, I’m not going to talk about Angel vs. Spike, but rather,Buffy’s agency and autonomy regarding the two vampires receiving their souls.

As just pointed out, Buffy herselfis the one who chooses to re-ensoul Angel. She makes the decision togive Angel back his soul, thereby decided for herself that she is ready to haveAngel back, ready to accept him back into her life, to forgive him and to tryto move on. She makes this decision, using her own autonomy and agency.However, when Spike gets his soul back, he does so without Buffy’s knowledge oracceptance and he therefore forces her into a position she was not readyfor nor had decided she wanted. Spike getting his soul back actually takes awayBuffy’s agency, as it forces her to forgive him, forces her to accept him backinto her life, probably before she was ready to, whereas because Buffy choseto have Angel re-ensouled, she wasn’t forced into a position of forgivenessagainst her will. But I digress.

Becoming contains some wonderfulcharacterisation for not only Buffy and Angel, but most of the other maincharacters too. Willow’s Start of Darkness actually has its beginnings as earlyas this episode, as she insists on casting the re-ensouling spell, mentioningthat she has been researching the Dark Arts for “educational fun”. That rightthere, is a huge red warning sign, showing that Willow is already at this earlystage delving into magics she’s not ready to handle. When she eventuallysucceeds in casting the spell, the power she channels is a clear indicator of justhow much latent power Willow has residing inside her. Jenny previouslymentioned that the magics used to re-ensoul Angel were lost, even to herpeople, yet Willow, a seventeen-year-old girl who has never attempted magicbefore, somehow manages to channel enough power to cast a spell which is over acentury old. If this isn’t an indicator of Willow’s darker path and subsequentpower thirst, I don’t know what it. It’s actually quite alarming, when onethinks about it.

Xander too gets some goodcharacterisation, despite him not coming off so well in this episode. I’vespoken about it before and Lord knows I will speak about it until the day Idie, but despite his asshole-ish tendencies, I really believe that there issomething deeper at play with Xander regarding Angel being re-ensouled andreceiving a second chance, and that something is Jesse’s death. When Jesse –someone whom Xander knew for years and cared for deeply – was turned, no oneever mentioned the possibility of redemption or change for Jesse. Instead,Xander was told, in no uncertain terms, that Jesse was gone and that the demonwho wore his face must be killed. Xander was then the one to actuallykill Jesse. I cannot stress enough how much of an impact this would have had onXander, the trauma he probably felt, and his only rationalization was thatvampires were evil and therefore Jesse was evil and he, Xander, had no choicebut to kill him.

Then, along comes Angel, thevampire with a soul, the man Buffy loves, allowed to live, allowed to be amember of the Scoobie gang. And Xander thinks, why wasn’t his friend allowedthe same chance, why wasn’t Jesse saved the same way Angel was. But Xander,despite what the fandom believes, actually does tolerate Angel while he has asoul (“Angel’s our friend! Except I don’t like him.”) Then Angel loses hissoul, and he becomes the demon that Xander was told Jesse was, yet Buffydoesn’t kill him, doesn’t hunt him. No one is pushing Buffy to kill him. And soXander sees the unfairness in this, the injustice of him having to kill hisbest friend but Buffy not only allowing Angelus to live, but offering him asecond chance. So he acts like a dick, throws Jenny’s death in Buffy’s face andutters the “Kick his ass” line. Because he never got over Jesse’s death, andbeing so young and immature, can’t see the bigger picture, only the injustice.And that’s why, after many years, I have been able to forgive Xander’s actionsin this episode.

Becoming showcases not only thecharacters’ emerging development, but also the development and stages of all ofthe romantic relationships. Willow’s and Oz’s relationship is shown to begetting deeper and more involved, as she calls out for Oz upon waking in thehospital, despite Xander’s declaration of love just moments before. Xander andCordelia embrace and kiss with genuine tenderness and affection, for probablythe first time this season, showing that their relationship is slowly evolvingbeyond that of a purely physical one. Giles’ relationship with Jenny is alsotouched upon, through Drusilla’s manipulations, showing how much Giles stillloves and grieves her (Giles’ torture is one of the few things I will neverforgive Angelus for, and I will always stand behind Giles and his attitudetowards Angel, even after Angel is re-ensouled). But the true emotional crux ofthis episode belongs to Buffy and Angel, and the tragic climax of the episodewhich sees Buffy having to kill Angel to save the world.

Ever since Angel turned intoAngelus, Buffy has spent her time building towards a mind frame wherein shewill be able to kill him (and failing miserably at that). Despite the fact thatAngelus is almost completely different to Angel, Buffy still can’t see past theface of her former lover, and time and again she lets Angelus go when sheeasily could have killed him. However, the dire circumstances in this episodefinally push her to the point where she is able to kill Angelus, and she goesinto the final fight ready to do what needs to be done.

Which is why it is all the moretragic when Angel is re-ensouled mere moments before Buffy is about tokill him. The horror and devastation on Buffy’s face as she realises what’shappened says it all. She went to the mansion to kill the demon wearing herformer lover’s face, not to end the man she loves with all her heart. Herresolve and dedication to saving the world is heartbreaking, as she tearfullytells Angel to close his eyes, before driving the sword through him. Sarah’sacting in this scene is phenomenal, as she portrays Buffy’s grief and horror atwhat she’s been forced to do. It’s interesting that at this point in theseries, Buffy is willing to sacrifice Angel to save the world, but by Season 5,she has become so broken by everything she’s faced that she is unable tosacrifice Dawn, choosing instead to let the world burn. It definitely says a lotabout Buffy’s mental state and how broken down and fractured her psyche becomesover the following seasons, and if we’re honest, this was probably the start ofit all, this first time her Slaying affected her on such a deep and personallevel.

I could honestly write so muchmore about this episode, given that I haven’t even really touched on Kendra’sdeath, or the flashbacks involving Drusilla and Angelus, not to mention Darla’sreappearance, but I believe I’ve rambled for long enough. All up, Becoming is agreat episode, definitely on of BtVS’s best. Well-written, beautifully acted,nicely paced and containing one of the most tragic climaxes of the series,Becoming deserves to be remembered as one of the greatest episodes of theWhedonverse.

#answered #buffy-angel-and-co #buffy the vampire slayer #btvs meta #bangel #meta

25 notes · View notes

sarimaposthumous · 5 years

Text

The High Priestess Chapter 3

TITLE: The High Priestess CHAPTER NUMBER: 3/? AUTHOR: SarimaPosthumous GENRE: Supernatural FIC SUMMARY: Jenny is an OC set in the Supernatural universe. She has owned a bar called the High Priestess for nine years and has managed to carve out her own niche in the hunting world. Everything changes when the two notorious hunters show up in her life after she’s managed to avoid them. RATING: M (Violence) WARNINGS: Season 14 Spoilers. It takes place during 14.02 “Gods and Monsters” AUTHORS NOTES: Flashbacks take place around Season 5, however, it mostly takes place in the present. This is a Flashback that takes place before Chapter 2. Please provide feedback!

Chapter 1 Chapter 2

It was a slow night at the High Priestess with hunters running around trying to fend off Michael’s monsters. I heard the door open, signaled by the little bell above the door. Turning around I saw the last person I expected to see. Honestly, I shouldn’t be surprised by now.

He stood in the doorway and glanced around before approaching the bar.

“Slow night?” he asked, his piercing blue eyes giving me a once over as he sat down. I closed my mouth, after realizing my initial shock left it agape, and nodded. Maintaining my composure and clearing my throat, I managed to ask, “What can I get for you?”

“Just a pitcher of beer,” he responded before looking back at his phone. As I filled the pitcher, I glanced at his slightly athletic 6’ 1” frame hunched over the bar. Setting the pitcher down in front of him, I couldn’t help but look at his face again. He was in his 40s, his salt and peppered scruff accentuated his features, and his thick dark blonde hair was spiked. He certainly lacked the confidence he held the last time I saw him. It was almost as if his confidence, his very being, was shattered and the sinister look in his eyes was replaced with sorrow and weariness. I could recognize him anywhere, but it couldn’t be him, it had to be his vessel. But how was that possible?

He looked up after I did not walk away. Jenny you need to get a grip. I smiled before he could say anything. “Is there anything else I could get for you?” He closed his mouth and shook his head before returning to his phone.

I turned around and before I could walk away, he piped up. “Actually, do you have WIFI? I need to do some research.” I told him the password as he pulled his laptop out of the bag sitting next to him.

I filled two more pitchers and walked over to a couple of hunters sitting in the back who were glancing suspiciously at the man sitting at the bar. Setting it down in front of them, they looked up at me quizzically. “Let’s not jump the gun and start anything right now because I am not looking to clean up a mess,” I whispered to them. They nodded but continued to give wary glances towards the man at the bar.

Sighing in resignation, I made my way towards the bar checking on various patrons as I considered approaching him. I stepped behind the bar and began tidying up as I walked towards him. “So, what brings you here…?” I let the question hang so he could fill in his name.

“Nick,” he responded before glancing up at me. “I’m just passing through on my way to Delaware.”

“Delaware, huh, I think that is one of the few states I have yet to visit. Is it nice, or, is it your first time visiting?” I inquired.

He glanced at me thoughtfully, perhaps trying to discern how much information he wanted to divulge. “It’s where I am from, actually…I think it is a nice place, but it has been a while since I’ve been home.” He took a sip of his drink.

It has to be just his vessel. “What makes you want to return now?” He didn’t respond as he considered his words before changing the subject.

“This is a nice bar Jenny, how long have you owned it?” he asked as he looked around before his eyes settled on me.

I chuckled. “About 10 years now,” I paused, “is it that obvious?”

“Well, with the way you walk around this place and give free drinks to a couple of hunters back there to keep the peace, it is pretty obvious,” he looked at me expectantly as if waiting for me to lie or lose my cool. But in return I just smiled at him. “Impressive,” I replied.

“You obviously know a lot more than you let on,” he continued, “so, what do you know about me?” He was testing me.

I set the rag down and stretched my back as I quickly pondered my response. As I stretched, I noticed the not-so-subtle glance at my chest before he quickly met my gaze once more. “I know your name is Nick, you’re from Delaware, and that you haven’t been home since, oh what was it, September 2009? All I know is you were possessed by Lucifer after your family was killed.”

“How do you know I am not Lucifer now?” he asked.

“Well, I heard that Dean killed Lucifer. Plus, I’ve met good ol’ Luci on a hunt and a couple of times after, you’re…different,” I responded. My response seemed to trigger something in him because he cringed and rubbed his eyes. “Are you okay?”

He shook his head and took a deep breath as pain crossed his features. “I remember you, Jenny. Lucifer let you go.” This surprised me. He glanced around, lowered his voice, and leaned towards me. “Ever since I woke up after Lucifer was killed. I keep getting flashes of what he’s done when possessing me.” He must have remembered how many hunters Lucifer killed that night because he choked back a sob before taking another drink. I instinctively reached my hand out to comfort him, but he jerked his arm away. I put my hands up to show I meant no harm. “I need to make things right,” he continued. “I need to find out who killed my wife and son,” he said softly as he twisted his wedding band around his finger.

“Would you like my help? It’s probably a cold case now, but I could see if I can find the police files in their database, if you would like?” I offered. He stopped twiddling with his ring before glancing up at me. “Why would you help me?” he asked softly.

“Well, I am in the service industry,” I joked. “But in all seriousness, you weren’t in control. What Lucifer did, it’s not your fault.”

Nick snapped at my comment. “HOW IS IT NOT MY FAULT!?” he shouted as he stood up. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a handful of hunters stand up, ready to step in. I calmly held up my hand and they slowly sat back down as Nick continued his tirade.

“I let him in, I said yes to him. Do you understand? Me, I let him in,” he grabbed his pitcher and flung it across the room and fell into his knees and began sobbing. Somehow, I managed to quickly get my 5’4” body over the bar to get to him. He looked up and his demeanor completely changed in a split second as he flicked his wrist in my direction, reminiscent of what Lucifer would do to get people away from him. This concerned me, but I would worry about that later as it did nothing now. I gingerly placed my hand on his shoulder as I knelt down.

“Let’s go somewhere private,” I whispered and squeezed his shoulder. He conceded as I gently pulled him to his feet and pulled him towards my office. I noticed Carl standing with a mop in hand from rushing out of the supply closet due to the commotion. Gesturing to him to keep an eye on the bar, I followed Nick into the office. We sat down, and I pulled out my laptop to access the police department’s database as Nick sat there with his head in his hands.

“Their names were Sarah and Teddy,” his muffled voice came through his hands. As I pulled up the case files, I noticed that it was a cold case and printed everything out for him. “It looks like it became a cold case over the years. The night that Sarah…she called the police that night to “report a prowler” in the neighborhood. Once the police arrived, they discovered Sarah and Teddy.” I kept reading as Nick patiently waited. “There was a witness, one of your neighbors, but he later recanted his statement.” Nick’s expression darkened. “Who?” he asked through gritted teeth. “Arty?” I said as I watched Nick’s hands begin to tremble. “Arty,” he repeated as his eyes narrowed. I stood up to grab the papers from the printer and placed them in a manila folder before handing them to Nick.

He contemplated the folder before looking up at me. “Thanks Jenny,” his expression turned sheepish. “I’m sorry for throwing the drink across bar.”

I smiled, “they’re plastic for a reason. Look, it’s late and if you need a place to stay, I have a spare room. If not, you’re welcome back anytime. Hunters won’t mess with you here…it’s neutral ground so to speak.”

He looked at the corner where Duke was laying down and watching him. “Cute dog,” he mentioned. Now this shocked me, and I put my hand on the door before he could open it. “How can you see her?” I asked.

“What do you mean?” he questioned.

“Duke is a hellhound,” I whispered. It seemed that being possessed and then manufactured for Lucifer really affected his psyche. He looked between Duke and myself and I noticed she started wagging her tail. Lucifer did save hellhounds, so it was only reasonable for her to be impartial to him…and his vessel.

“How can we see her? Why do you own a hellhound?” his brows furrowed as he asked.

“Crowley owed me, so he gave me a pet hellhound and the ability to see them. As for how you can see them, that I don’t know,” I looked back over at Duke and she stood up and walked over to Nick before sniffing his hand. His expression softened as he knelt down to pet her as she wagged her tail.

He stood up and shook my hand, “thank you for all of your help Jenny, and your offer, but I am staying at motel nearby. I’ll definitely stop by here next time I am in the area though. I’m gonna head back and compare notes.”

I followed him out of the office and noticed that many of the hunters were conspicuously watching us to make sure Nick didn’t transform into Lucifer. Nick took some money out and placed it on the bar for his drink and gathered his things. He waved to everyone in the bar and left.

“So, Lucifer is really dead, huh?” Seth, one of the hunters, asked. I nodded as I walked towards my office to ponder what just happened. “Carl, can you close tonight?” he nodded in response and I went to grab my laptop and Duke before heading back to my apartment in the back.

Stripping myself of my clothes, I stepped into the shower and let the hot water wash over me as I thought about the hunt that involved Lucifer.

At this point, I had only been hunting and running the High Priestess for a few months. A lot of the hunters that came through would take me along on hunts to teach me. On this particular night, two hunters came running into the bar frantic about what they had heard. There was a sighting of about ten demons about 30 minutes south of where we were, and they needed help. At the time, there were only three other hunters in the bar, so they reluctantly brought me along as back up. Not that I was incompetent by any means, but I had not dealt with any demons since, well, since a few slaughtered my family.

The six of us set out to pursue the demons. When we arrived at the small town, it was eerily quiet – as if it were abandoned. We drew our weapons and set out to find the demons, but there was no one in sight. We walked around the public square and a demon stepped out of an alleyway and we raised our guns, but more demons snuck up behind us and grabbed a hold of us. A struggle ensued as we attempted to fight them off.

“There is no use in fighting, Lucifer is expecting you,” he chuckled. One of the demons went down along with one of the hunters. I was currently in a fistfight with a demon myself when I was grabbed from behind by another demon. More demons showed up and they got the upper hand. They dragged us into the building and up a flight of stairs and into a large room. There were bodies everywhere and Lucifer sat in the middle of the room with what appeared to be a goblet of blood in his hand and fresh body next to him.

“Sorry about the mess, I didn’t have time to clean up,” said Lucifer as he took a sip before standing and approached us. I struggled and attempted to free myself from the demon’s grasp to no avail. This caught Lucifer’s attention and he turned his sinister eyes towards me before approaching me. He grabbed my face with his hand, his fingers practically digging into my cheek, and stooped down so that his face was mere inches from mine. His voice was soft as he spoke to me. “Well, well, well if it isn’t Jenny. It’s about time you started hunting.” With him so close to me, I noticed the skin around his hairline was practically eroding. It took me a second before I realized he knew my name.

“How do you know who I am?” I barely managed to say this without my voice faltering. He chuckled at this response and pulled me towards him. “Let’s just say I’m in the habit of picking people who have potential,” he responded. Lucifer shoved me towards the chair in the middle of the room and forced me to sit down. I tried standing up, but his invisible restraints kept me in place. “What are you…” he cut me off by quickly leaning down and putting his finger to my lips.

“Shhhh. I’ll get to you in a minute, just wait your turn,” he whispered. Lucifer turned around to face the rest of the hunters and straightened his back. “Look Jenny and I need to have a little chat and, frankly, I don’t need all of you here.” He pulled a knife from his pocket and killed all of the hunters. I begged and pleaded, but he didn’t acknowledge me. Not being able to watch, I looked away and continued to sob. With the hunters dead at his feet he turned to the demons, “Yeah it applies to you too,” he shrugged and they all looked at each other before he snapped his fingers, killing them all. Now it was just the two of us as he turned back to me, his face and hands smattered with blood. He must have noticed my horrified expression and just shrugged his shoulders, “What? They’re just demons,” he replied nonchalantly.

No longer restrained to the chair, I charged at him, but he easily grabbed and threw me to the ground. Not giving up without a fight I clamored to my feet and attempted to charge at him again, but he grabbed me in the process and slammed me into the wall. Pinning me, he spoke again. “Jenny, after all this trouble I went through to get you to come here, this is how you repay the favor? Tsk tsk.”

“What the hell do you want from me?” I struggled against him.

“When I was in the cage, I kept an ear out and paid attention all you filthy, hairless apes because, believe it or not, some of you can prove to be useful. I saw the potential you had for this life, Jenny, so I called in a favor to nudge you in right direction. You can thank me later,” he replied smugly.

It clicked. “You had my family killed?” I asked, horrified at the thought.

“See, I knew you were a smart cookie,” he winked at me. “I’ve seen your future…”

I cut him off, “did you see in my future that I am going to kill you?”

Anger flashed in his eyes, his grip on me tightening. “As I said. I’ve seen your future. I know you can, and you will, build up a network within the supernatural. So, I want you to come work for me,” he stepped back and released me. “You will prove useful to my cause.”

My hands were balled up into fists and my body trembled with anger. “What makes you think I will help you?”

Lucifer held up a hand and ignored my question, “You don’t have to answer now, I’ll give you some time to think.”

I took a step towards him, “nothing you say is gonna…” he snapped his finger and I was at the High Priestess. Carl came running towards me as I collapsed to the ground.

That had to have been the worst hunt I had ever been on. I wiped away the tears that were streaming down my face and turned off the shower. I never told anyone about what Lucifer revealed to me that night. It would not have changed anything at this point. Stepping out, I thought back to my earlier conversation with Nick. This is a nice bar Jenny, how long have you owned it?

How did he know my name after so many years? Does he remember everything Lucifer did? If so, he had to have known more about Lucifer’s plans for me. Wiping the bathroom mirror with my hand, I looked at my reflection and thought back to my other interactions with Lucifer. What if he returns?

#supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural fandom #SupernaturalFANDOM #luciifer/nick #lucifer #lucifer fanfic #lucifer fanfiction #mark pellegrino #the high priestess #gods and monsters #supernatural season 14 #fanfiction #fanfic #SPN #spnfanfiction #spnfanfic

0 notes