#but it is really interesting on a character level to analyze the different ways the siblings act when they're trying to win someone over

[bitchthefuck1]

It's kind of funny that Kendall and Shiv are both equally delusional about their ability to charm people for business and somehow think they can do it even though they choke almost every single time, whereas it's like the one thing Roman is consistently good at despite being the "least legitimate" option.

I think part of this comes down to the fact that Shiv and Kendall both have very clear ideas of the versions of themselves they're trying to be and the images they're trying to project, and they're trying so hard to be seen that way that they end up coming off as a little desperate and off-putting. Meanwhile Roman "knows" that there's something wrong with him and he's worthless, so he doesn't get sucked into the trap of trying to force people to see his idea of himself and instead molds himself into whatever he thinks the other person wants from him because that's the only way he can compensate for "being him," which works very well in the short term but also means he's the least capable of maintaining any relationship for very long because he has no sense of self.

#this was going to be a joke about kendall consistently failing to charm anyone that isn't stewy (and still for some reason thinking he's #good at it) but then i thought about it too hard and started connecting dots #but it is really interesting on a character level to analyze the different ways the siblings act when they're trying to win someone over #kendall and shiv will try to find common ground but they always end up pushing too hard and overplaying their hands because they're #focussing too much on wanting to get the person to take them seriously or see them the way they want to be seen #and roman will test the waters a bit but not say anything definitive until he get the person talking and can see what it is they want #and then just says whatever it is he thinks they want to hear #which also makes a lot of sense with the abuse dynamics since he was the one most likely to actually get hit so the goal is to just make #sure dad never gets angry at you and tell him whatever you need to to avoid that because the consequences will be worse #anyways its 2 am here you go #succession #kendall roy #shiv roy #roman roy

[icewindandboringhorror]

I know multiple of these are likely important to people, but I'm asking in terms of like - which of these do you tend to focus on the MOST, enjoy the most, that is most essential for you to actually care about the media, etc.?

(For example: someone finding "Relatability" most important would likely not enjoy a show much if they have trouble empathizing with the characters/relating to it, even if it were good otherwise. Or, someone might be able to overlook bad acting and ugly costumes, as long as the Character Dynamics are fun to them, because they value that more than Aesthetics- while for others, bad costumes would be a dealbreaker.)

Also feel free to reblog and explain your answer or more information in the tags- I've always been curious about people's relationships to media, how they conceptualize it/what they get out of it, how some people value some parts more than others, how that informs their overall taste and genres they may be more inclined towards, etc. :0c

#I was having a conversation with a friend about our favorite type of media and they said the reason they DON'T like historical or fantasy #media or etc. is because they can't imagine themselves being in those situations like it's too detached from anything that they can relate #to personally. they put themselves in the shoes of the characters and apparently like feel emotions while watching stuff and actually #get into the way the characters are feeling so they kind of judge how 'good' or 'bad' a show's writing/setting/etc. are by how it makes #them feel and if they think the characters reacted realistically based on what they were feeling in the moment/what in their head they #would be feeling if they were in the postion of the character. SO apparently the distance of it being in an unrelatable setting or too #detached from our reality makes it harder for them to relate to and less able to really engage with it on that level. WHEREAS I watch #things exclusively in a very like.. detached way?? I'm INTERESTED.. it's like im intellectually analyzing everyhting that's happening and #can be intrigued by events but it's not in an emotional way? More of like a distant 'intellectual curiosity'. Maybe the premise or the #aesthetics or something about it has piqued an interest for me to observe it. to see what it's like or how it plays out. how the idea #is executed or etc. But like.. I cannot remember EVER really relating to any character or situation or projecting onto a character #or having those sorts of feelings or investment in it. That is just not a central part of why/how I watch things or what I care about #BUT after this I was thinking maybe this is my disconnect? I do not seem to conceptualize media the way some other people do and I often #walk away with an entirely different take on things. etc. So I wonder if maybe it's part of how everyone values different things probably? #maybe I literally just watch stuff and percieve it from a different frame of mind that others. More of a like detached curiosity #vaguely bemused analysis mode. Instead of a 'I am deeply emotionally invested in this and am feeling for all the characters' mode #And also I bet people who care more about plot/story are also the people who mind spoilers. Whereas for me I literally seek out spoilers #intentionally because that element of 'suprise ooh what will happen next!' is not central at all to my enjoyment. I could know literally #everything that will happen and still can find it interesting to observe - since for me #that's not the point. I'd rather know the ending so I can determine whether I want to invest the time in it in the first place. etc. #ANYWAY!! If I had to choose - I would say I'm usually heavily focused on world details and aesthetics. With only a slight preference #towards characters individually being interesting. Group dynamics can sometimes be okay but I get tired of everything being about relations #hips and romance - especially when sometimes it seems to be like. people who could not stand on their own as a character/are fundamentally #boring otherwise lol. I would watch a series of just one guy locked in a closet talking to himself as long as he was interesting and saying #things that were amusing or notable for some reason lol. I actually tend to dislike plot because most 'plot heavy' things like action focus #ed shows ALWAYS feel to me like they're moving so fast just to get from one thing to another that I'm not getting enough details. Part of #why I tend to not like movies. the time limit makes them too quick. I need a 95 hour expostion dump of the history of the entire world #and a series of 17 episodes straight where a guy is trapped in a room & the audience is just psychoanalyzing him. hghj.. Maybe I find all #characters annoying/unrelatable bc people w my personality type make bad characters/are not often represented (or are done BADLY). so then #I'm just picking 'who is the LEAST insufferable? who could i study like a lab rat?' whilst my main focus is the worldbuilding&costumes lol

[santacoppelia]

The HUGE analysis - This season starts and ends with a discussion, doesn't it?

Ok, my loves. This was one of the really long metas I've been working with, and probably the one that has taken me the longest (because it depended a lot on rewatching the season time and again).

I couldn't help to notice that the fist interaction Aziraphale and Crowley have in season 2 is a fight, really. Yeah, we have the beautiful “in the beginning” sequence, with both of them being angels and happy and all the such (oh, how lovely, Neil Gaiman planting the seeds of why it will matter to us that Aziraphale will not be fighting the idea of inviting Crowley to Heaven, because he remembers that happy, careless guy). But after the intro, we see them having a big disagreement… And we end the season in the biggest disagreement they have had, probably, in 6,000 years.

I love over-analyzing and dissecting narratives and characters, and more so if I can use only what we’ve been shown in the screen. Therefore, I believe that the first fight of the season tells us a lot of the things we will need to know to understand the final fight of the season between them. Let’s take a look, shall we?

The first fight is motivated by having an amnesiac Gabriel in the bookshop.

They see the same circumstance: Gabriel in the bookshop means trouble with Heaven. He is also an individual risk, because he has menaced Aziraphale directly (well, Crowley under the visage of Aziraphale).

It affects each of them differently: even when they both panic, Aziraphale feels compelled to be kind to Gabriel (gives him a blanket and hot cocoa) while Crowley has a full-on panic induced reaction and gets defensive.

They propose opposite solutions: Azi wants to do the Good thing, taking the “higher road” (help Gabriel), while Crowley wants to do His Own thing: “Protect the precious, peaceful, fragile existence I have carved for myself”

At that moment, Aziraphale corrects him and marks a “we”, which is very interesting. But immediately after that, Aziraphale gets all "my way or the highway".

Crowley asks for clarification, with a well-leveled tone of voice: “Is this how it is going to go?”

Azi clarifies "no, I want you to help me!" But then he does the passive-aggressive thing: "if you won't, you won't". (oh, Aziraphale, how you triggered me here, my dear chap. I was angry at the character the first 6 times I saw this)

Therefore, Crowley is out. He marks a clear limit: “I won't. You are on your own”, and then storms out. No Eccles cakes would help him: he needs a breather and counting to 10. That doesn't help either.

Crowley only comes back after gaining an extra perspective: the "extreme sanctions" talk with Beelzebub.

When he comes back, Aziraphale will stand his ground: he feels he deserves an apology, which is delivered via a “I was wrong, you were right” literal admission (even when he probably wasn't "right", but that's their way... And they've been doing it since 1650, or so they say). Then they are able to work together again.

Now, let’s see how this dynamic plays out in their last discussion of the season:

They come from different sides of the same experience: Crowley went to Heaven to investigate and learned about the plans to continue with the end of the world, while Aziraphale stayed defending the bookshop. Then Crowley saves the humans, while Aziraphale solved the Beelzebub + Gabriel affair.

They haven’t had time to talk, as they get interrupted by The Metatron. While he takes Aziraphale, Crowley receives a visit from Maggie and Nina.

Each one of them gained an extra different perspective: Azi, the Metatron proposal (and veiled menace); Crowley, the pep talk/scolding from the couple they were trying to get together.

This makes them develop different solutions:

Crowley wants to finally admit what Azi has been saying all the season: they are a "we" (Azi said so when Crowley talked about his “precious, peaceful, fragile existence”; he said it again when talking about “our car” and reinforced it with the bookshop)

Azi wants to take the "higher road": go to Heaven, reinstate Crowley as an angel, so they can still work together.

Crowley sees the “usual dynamic” of their disagreements coming: it will be Azi’s way (or the highway). That has happened before, in front of our eyes, and not only in this season: it happened also in season 1, but we have already attested that it is still happening, and it is even “worse” (Aziraphale being a little “petty” with the “if you do, it is fine, but if you won’t, you are on your own” in the Gabriel discussion).

Crowley gets indignant. He asks, tentatively, if he told him where to stick it… And then he reinforces his belief. We are better than that, YOU are better than that, you don’t need them, I don’t need them; then he makes the first mention of the offer of getting back to Hell (which he hadn’t shared with Aziraphale), and makes a new point: I said no, neither should you!

Aziraphale goes back to the “you are the bad guys!” thing. Heaven being the side of Truth, of Light, of Good… It is not the propaganda Crowley needed for this move.

Crowley then clarifies the fallacy in his logic: when Heaven ends life on Earth, it’ll be just as dead as if Hell ended it.

Aziraphale then sees the "undesirable result" coming: Crowley is not going to accept, not with that argument.

Crowley makes his plead grow in urgency: Tell me you said no.

Aziraphale’s pitch of voice goes high (usually used as a sign of distress): “If I’m in charge, I can make a difference.”

Crowley understands. This is his “my way or the highway” moment. That’s why he comes up with the courage to make his half-proposal-half admission.

Crowley never gets to state out loud the “I want us to be together in a formal way” part. His voice breaks before he does so. He mentions all of the reasons they have to stay together, which Aziraphale already knows: we have been together for a long time, we’ve been a group (“our own side” was the way he always said it before) and we’ve spent our existence pretending that we aren’t (Azi also knows that! He has been working hard into making Crowley notice it!)

You can see, when they shoot Aziraphale’s face, he squints a little during that moment: maybe questioning, a little disbelief? As usual with Michael Sheen, it is a blink it and you’ll miss it moment.

After the grunt, Crowley proposes his alternative solution: going off together, using Beelzebub & Gabriel as an example that they could.

Therefore, what Aziraphale has just listened is what he already knew: yes, they are a “we”. Crowley wants to run away (he had proposed it twice during the Armageddidn’t, another pattern they have already established).

The next step is the usual way for Aziraphale: he reinforces his proposal: come with me, to Heaven. Ill’ run it, you can be my second in command. This idea has rubbed me wrong since the first time I watched this scene. Why remark the hierarchy? (not to say that I’m in Crowley’s side in here, but… It was weird and uncomfortable to think of them in a vertical power structure; they have always been equals).

Then, he goes back to making a difference, only it is “we” this time. Crowley is noticing he won’t back down… But Aziraphale usually doesn’t.

“You can’t leave this bookshop” works as a representation, a figure of speech. “This Bookshop” is “This life we have been building”, and they both understand it as such.

“Oh, Crowley… Nothing lasts forever…” For Aziraphale, it means he can leave this for something greater. For Crowley, it means… Actually, the same. But without him. Because he knows the “my way or the highway” side of Aziraphale, and none of them will budge. Aaaaand… that’s Crowley heart breaking. The rest of the scene happens with Crowley in “breakup mode”.

Aziraphale is used to “the discussion dance”. He Insists, “Crowley! Come back, to Heaven, work with me! We can be together, Angels! Doing good!”. He promises all he can: “come back, work with me, we can be together”, which have always been Crowley’s triggers to change his mind. However, the problem lies within the “angels doing good”. That’s the part that Aziraphale would need to let go before getting back to Crowley.

And then, he breaks down: “I need you!!” That has always worked! Aziraphale knows that Crowley loves being needed, he won’t leave his angel when in need, right?

And then, he gets angry. And he questions if Crowley has understood what he is offering, which transforms in an “I don’t think your exactly and my exactly are the same exactly” all over again.

Crowley is already brokenhearted, so he answers truthfully, as far as he knows. He understands how terrible the offer of going back to heaven is for both of them, and is not aware of the veiled threat in Metatron’s offer. He knows that going back to Heaven is a non-negotiable boundary, and Aziraphale is absolutely determined to cross it.

Aziraphale, then, does his passive-aggressive shit again: “I guess there is nothing more to say”. My guy, my love, you need to become better at negotiating with your loved one.

This is where Crowley decides to show, don’t tell, the hurt: no nightingales. And then… The “You idiot. We could have been… us” (no, you couldn’t, it was always too late!!! First the pandemic, which I’ve decided to treat as canon, then Gabriel. They never stood a chance).

In this context, Crowley’s kiss is a desperate way to say good-bye to the person he cared most for the last 6,000 years; also an angry way to regain some semblance of control and affect Aziraphale; and a final way to get some “closure”. Is there desire? Is there love? Maybe. But they are lost in a cocktail of emotions that have been stated during the rest of the discussion.

The angry “I forgive you”, which is also a usual dynamic for Aziraphale when he is angry with Crowley, gets there too late for Crowley to react to. He has already “checked out”. That’s why the “don’t bother” feels almost like an afterthought and comes after a small sigh.

After watching this 16 times, I’m pretty confident that the first thing Aziraphale mouths is a “no…” and then… he sobs a little. Michael Sheen, you’re a beautiful actor. The rest of it is a masterclass in using microexpressions to convey a whirlwind of emotions in under 2 minutes.

Sooooo... Did I hurt my own emotions while writing this? Yes. Did I absolutely need to do so? Also yes. Even when I like doing intertextual readings (and that's why I like bringing some theology to some of my musings), reading what is in "the text" (in the scenes we have watched, in the dialogues we've been shown) gives me an enormous amount of pleasure, and I find a lot of comfort in believing that most of the things that I'll need to understand and enjoy a great piece of media are being given to me inside it. And I believe Good Omens is a great piece of media!!

I have no Shakespeare to offer you this time. Let me know what you think!!

#good omens 2 #good omens meta #good omens spoilers #ineffable divorce #the final fifteen #narrative analysis #character analysis #good omens #anthony j crowley #aziraphale #If I was into Academia this should be counted as a journal referenced publication #Making my Comms Sci degree useful for something

[overleftdown]

i finally got around to watching archie madekwe's interview with in creative company and it was astounding, for one. i geeked the fuck out. there's so much to talk about.

his and emerald's understanding of farleigh's character on such a deep level, not just what was on screen, but in his past and in his thoughts... gagged! i was very interested in his interpretation of farleigh's family; archie considers farleigh's mother as a kind of enigmatic fallen star who behaved more as a friend than a parent. archie describes farleigh's childhood as overly mature and neglectful, with the character having to experience more mature and adult situations than he might've in a different family.

another important thing archie touched on was the power dynamics between oliver and farleigh, and how threatening they appeared to each other. archie believes that farleigh didn't truly understand the genius of oliver and how intricate a game he was playing; that never stopped farleigh from observing oliver at any opportune moment. eventually, farleigh had a deeper understanding of oliver's sinister obsession with felix, as well as the way he manipulated the family. this is why, in the karaoke scene, farleigh doesn't bite the bait that oliver offers him. he's not grateful for oliver's sympathy or companionship; he's appalled that oliver would even have a personal conversation with him in the first place.

the dynamic archie describes between felix and farleigh is also really interesting to me. he discusses the transactional nature of their relationship, but also how deeply farleigh loved felix. there was also the need to learn exactly how to behave amongst the cattons; when to pull away, when to fade into the background, where to assert or insert yourself in a situation. farleigh is, above most other things, an observer. the nature in which oliver behaves in the early summer, how clumsily he navigates conversation, incited a lot of judgement from farleigh. part of it was the knowledge that oliver didn't quite fit, didn't make sense among the cattons.

archie talks about how self-serving the majority of farleigh's socialization is, at oxbridge. his opening line is entirely intended to cater towards the people he is walking with. there has always been a need for farleigh to adapt, observe, overthink. in this environment, love is neither unconditional nor reliable.

the biggest difference i've clocked between farleigh and oliver is the way they play the game. farleigh plays his own cards, he analyzes what he's seen, and acts accordingly. whereas oliver integrates, injects, and manipulates. farleigh is playing poker while oliver is playing chess.

i'm an actual blabbermouth.

#farleigh start #oliver quick #archie madekwe #i could actually listen to archie talk about anything for however long and it would be the most engaging thing of my life #hyperfixation rizz #saltburn #saltburn 2023 #farleigh is my favorite last girl #he's got a damn good poker face #you have to admit #the way he played oliver in that karaoke scene? #diabolical #someone needed to humble that white boy #only farleigh could do it!

[themushroomofdeath]

law x female character | pre-time skip and debut hurt/comfort - angst-ish | anxiety, loss trauma, pre-relationship, panic attack

Trafalgar Law didn’t do love.

It was just who he was, he had already locked the part of himself that craved for those feeble, fragile feelings of affection a long time ago, it had died with his family, was buried together with Cora-san - the last spark of hope, an arm to hold, a father figure, a loved one. Now there was only a shell of a once carefree child, a cold man who kept everyone at an arm-length, one who despised the idea of attachment, of giving himself to something that could very easily be taken away.

No, he liked having control over himself, over his crew, his environment, but mostly, over his heart. Fancied himself a genius of a kind, always one step ahead of everyone else, not making a decision that would affect the decades worth of planning he did for his future self. A life made only for vengeance, for his family, for Cora, for the people he once knew and the child he once was.

So it really came as a surprise to him, that first irregular beat of his heart.

She was someone he never imagined to find in his life, a light of hope when he thought all was lost¹, an intellectual partner to his discuss his interests - and a diversity of others she kept picking along the way to share, an unexpected colleague of profession and abilities, someone not afraid to speak freely about what was on her brilliant mind, but never one to make others feel inferior compared to her. Her kindness seemed unlimited, as she confided one day about her dreams. “I want to be able to help the unfortunate, never have someone lose a loved one out of helplessness again.” As if she could read his concealed past, making him wish to have met someone like her, all those ten years ago, when he needed the most. 

“You can’t help everyone, that’s absurd.” Was what he answered instead. Like her warmth hasn't touched him enough to hope, to wish to be able help her achieve exactly that - be the beacon for those lost in the middle of a storm.

He should’ve stopped there, when the warmth reached him the first time. Should’ve stopped reaching for it. But like a man lost to an addiction, he would see himself looking for her around the Tang, just to talk - he would justify, she was the only one who understood all those medic jargons, she never laughed when she accidentally found his comics collection, she was interested in learning about it. He would even hear her opinion with his plans, her ability to look from a different perspective useful for him - no, not him, for their crew. In a year, she became a trusted crewmate and an indispensable partner.

And that was increasingly frustrating. 

Trusted enough to share his space, his usual alone time after a long time of work and research, he would invite her to stay around - as she was never too pushy of a friend, but always accepting of his company. They would sit alongside - a plate of rice balls, made exactly to his liking, two cups of warm tea brewed by the woman, and countless paper sheets scattered on his table. He was happy to share his studies with her, hear what she had heard and seen about the topic, an usual pleasant smile masking his features, but doing nothing to hide the fondness in his eyes. If he could’ve seen himself, he would’ve stopped right there.

In the moment, she was explaining how her powers worked, the ability of looking under a man’s skin and muscles with only her mind, how with the years of training in animals in her backyard, she’d come with the idea of reaching further and analyzing a being on a cellular level, forcing the seamless magical healing of most illness with her childhood wonder and endless hours of study of the human body. 

In awe as he was, he didn’t catch on how close she was, used from all her hand gestures when she was enthusiastic with a subject, it took him a moment to register how her soft and warm hand had landed on the skin of forearm, right above his tattoo. She was in the middle of explaining how he could use his powers in a similar way if he wanted to, when he realized the touch, the way his heart picked with interest and his entire body burned with longing for more. 

It was like being touched by the sun. One that should be always unreachable - to someone made of darkness like him, those burning hands were able to leave irreparable marks behind. As he would never be able to pretend it wasn’t happening with him, to ignore those pesky feelings ever again.

And as soon as he felt it, he abruptly took his distance from it. Pulling his arm from her reach, expression changing from passive to guarded, looking away from her surprised and hurt eyes, before cleaning his throat and deciding it was best for them to turn in for the night. Away from each other. 

The damage was done.

It has been a month since he started avoiding her, everyone in the ship can tell. Till that fatidical day, they were like two celestial bodies who constantly orbited each other’s space, now it was as if the mere presence of the doctor around a room were enough to repel the man back to his private quarter - in which he was taking refuge from inquiring eyes. Only the oldest crew was ever allowed to enter for reports and emergency matters, and even then they would always leave with a heavy frown and no answers to their captain’s strange behavior.

It was taking a toll on the crew as well, whenever someone walked by him with a smile and a polite face, only to be met with his flaring temper and moodiness, in which no one could ever understand why. Many tried to question the woman, to no avail, as she had no idea of what was happening either, he had just closed himself off from the world, and as an understanding person, she was trying to give him space to work it out with himself. 

But damn, she missed him. And if she only knew how much he was yearning for her, fighting against his deepest fears, trying to escape the confinement of his walls, causing all these explosive and melancholic sentiments to surface. It was maddening. He wanted to be rational about it - perhaps tell her to leave, but not wanting to ever live without her, ever again.

After two months, he felt like ripping the hair from his scalp. It was like her presence was just becoming stronger in the walls of the Polar Tang, he could hear her melodic laugh from anywhere, could smell her perfume everywhere, taste her hand in the food Bepo would bring to his room - she knew how to make it exactly how he liked. 

He couldn’t just give in. Too prideful, too committed to his work and chosen fate, too scared. So scared. What if he gave in? A pirate taking a lover was unheard of, and those who did would just live in a constant state of paranoia, not knowing when their enemies would find out about the weakness of their heart. Because that's what it was. A Weakness. Or at least that's what he kept telling himself. He would lose her, and that would be enough to break the last amended piece keeping his sanity intact. 

Just need to wait it out…. It shall pass, he tried to rationalize. 

After three months, it was her turn to be done with his behavior. She came to his room one day, with the excuse of bringing his favorite snacks, ignoring the warning glare thrown to her form. At this point, that was just typical behavior from the young surgeon. 

He was going to talk about this, or he was going to tell her to leave, because no matter how much she cried from the yearning of his presence and the confusion of not knowing what was really happening between them, she was also a prideful woman, and she was just as much done with suffering for a person she barely knew, even if she opened her own walls to receive him, she could just as much close it if prompted.

“So, are we going to talk about this - or you’ll keep pretending I don’t know you are avoiding me like I have the plague?” 

Oh, how infuriating she was. Snarky, sarcastic, annoying, fucking gorgeous. For a long second, he could only sharp his gaze, his expression taking a note of fury, wanting to tell her to back off. Like a cornered wild animal would. But he was no mindless animal, and her stance above his sitting form did not change one bit, like she knew the power she held over him. He could never truly hurt this woman.

Taking a breath, reclining his posture back in his chair, he schooled his expression back into a blank unamused glare, before answering. “It’s not something I wish to discuss. If it bothers you, that’s your problem, not mine.”

He could see how it immediately affected her, and it affected him as well. Her eyes widened, like she didn’t expect to be blatantly rejected, not after all the time they had been together as colleagues and partners - as friends. Her posture went rigid, like struggling with herself to have strength to fight back, to fight back the tears threatening to escape, and he could feel his heart constricting with the instinct of reaching out and taking her in his arms, protective of her - even if he was the one instigating those emotions in her heart. Her beautiful heart, who did not deserve to be treated that way, who should have left the moment it met with a heartless being like himself. If only he was selfless enough to tell her to run and never look back.

“Fine,” she managed to say, between a difficult breath, “If that’s what you wish, I will pretend we were never friends, then.” And with that resolution, she turned her wheels and left, closing the door with enough strength to be heard by anyone who was hoping for a good outcome from their meeting. And it was like all heart pirates, a few room away, collectively sighed defeated from it. 

That night, she wasn’t the only one who cried in her pillow.

It wasn't long after that night, when the heart pirates came to a new inhabited island, looking to resupply for a longer ride. It was a breath of fresh air, to not be stuck inside a submarine with the stubborn couple of bulls, hitting their head against each other, glaring from their corner, making everyone’s life miserable. 

And it came to no surprise that Eliza was the first one to be out, the moment the Tang submerged and ported, ready to use her energy to work and actively ignore Law’s existence for the few days or weeks that they kept anchored in the island. Hell, it might be a month before anyone is ready to leave and go back to the uncomfortable feeling. It came to a collective agreement that they better take their time away from the ship while they could, as long as the Captain didn’t catch on it.

And he did catch on it, around day five. Every supplement needed was reestablished, but no one seemed to be in a rush to go back to the next adventure, and the Island wasn’t even that impressive to keep them around, just a small village with enough entertainment for a day or two. 

“Penguin. What do you all think you are doing?” He would ask that day, after spotting the man lazily sunbathing in the ship’s deck, earning a long-suffered groan from his crewmate. From all the years that he was loyal to his captain and so-called friend, it was one of the first times where he truly wished the man could take a hint and work on his own problems. 

“What do you mean, Captain? We are taking one day to relax, you should too!” He said, but what he really wanted to express with that was: and please make amends with your lady friend, you are being a problematic asshole, she is so nice to you and everyone else, why are you acting like that? Are you having relationship problems or something? I know you have no experience, but anyone would be able to work it out after three whole months. But again, he did know his long-time leader from the inside out, pointing out anything obvious to him would just aggravate the situation, and chances were, he already knew he was being difficult.

Trafalgar Law from his part, only rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue, accepting it. Because he was not stupid, truly, he could tell how much it was heaving on his crew, his little squabble with the second tribulation’s doctor. And perhaps he did needed a break, not only from his work, but from all the drama he created for himself. 

So, hugging Kikoku close to his body, he left to find a distraction.

As it has been happening the entirety of this particular year, it seemed fate was against his plans of finding a peace of mind. 

Walking into a secluded inn bar, believing to be a refuge from the busy streets, the last thing the pirate expected to find was the object of his affections and anguish, sitting with her back turned to the door, fully engrossed in a discussion with another man. Not that he immediately paid attention to said man, but the way the other had his knee so close to his crewmate’s barely covered (deliciously voluptuous) thigh, while they both animatedly chatted, was enough to catch his scrutiny.

It was a bad idea to stay, he knew that, but he couldn’t help his primal instinct of protection to grab a hold of his brain, as he cared for this woman enough to keep an eye on possible harassment towards his crewmate. Right? At least that was what he kept telling himself, silently making his way towards a shadowy booth, sharp gaze focused on the scene before him.

There was an irritation growing inside him, a hand squeezing the pit of his stomach, making his hands clench under the table, for the mere thought of how adorable she looked gesticulating about a subject he couldn’t hear. It was him, a few months ago, who she would look after to share information and discoveries, it was him she would look with those big doe eyes, shining with excitement while she rambled away about something so new and interesting, she couldn’t help but have to share with someone willing to listen. 

And now he had shut her off, made her look for another person to give half the attention he had always been willing to offer, always enchanted by her intellect, but if he was a little more honest with himself, it was the way she’d seek him first. Holding him important enough to share her thoughts and confide her life with. Someone else having the same treatment was truly infuriating. 

But not only that, he could tell by the way the other man melted his entire posture towards her, he was very much interested in her beyond an intellectual stimulation. Only a few minutes of observation, and the Captain of the Heart Pirates was gritting his teeth, emotional brain rapidly winning over his logical responses to she’s not yours, never was, never will. Get yourself together. She didn’t seem bothered at all, either choosing to ignore or interested in what that man had to offer as well. 

His rational side was telling him to leave at this point, and he couldn't agree more to it. Sliding himself away from his seat, ready to ignore this whole encounter, before something caught his auditive senses, making his entire body go rigid. She laughed. That melodious and gorgeous sound, that he only ever heard during their shared times, alone in his office, talking about foolish memories and happier times.

In one shaky breath, heart hurting enough to suffocate, he turned back around, stalking his way towards the couple, stopping a foot from their forms, eyes blazing with quiet fury, but a placid expression of masked anger. She had only spinned around in her chair, before his gravy tone could be heard. “We need to talk. Come.” And he was leaving the establishment, not waiting for an answer, knowing she would follow anyway, as he was not only willing to speak about their problems, but he was her commanding figure in the hierarchy of their crew.

The quiet walk back to the was tense, even if he did slow his pace for her to keep the pace, aware of his long legs and more fit build to walk quickly compared to hers. He could feel her enragement and furious glare hitting the back of his head, but his mind was only filled with how he would go about this. 

Should he ask her to leave? She never truly wanted to join a pirate crew, their deal being about giving a space for her to work her medical research, be free to explore the islands they ported, to use her abilities to heal the people in need, in exchange, she’d use all her abilities to protect and treat the crew. 

But he didn’t think he could be that cruel nor that self centered with her, knowing she had no one prior to the heart pirates, who quickly became a found family of sorts to the female doctor. 

Walking through the deck, ignoring the questioning gazes, he went straight to his office, already planning to lie through his teeth to save himself from the situation he found himself into, pretend he was just saving her from an unfortunate encounter with someone she didn’t really wish to be around, he was too flirty, not interested in her as a intellectual partner, just a pass time. 

Perhaps come with terms of coming back to their somewhat friendship, with a level of boundaries around being too close and too personal, those feelings of desire would come to an end eventually, more hormones of his young blood, than actual wish for a relationship with someone who could make him happy. He didn’t wish for that kind of happiness, after all.

But before he could open his mouth, sitting in his chair, to gaze up to meet hers, she was already speaking, arms crossed over each other, face contorted in one of resolve and grief. “Law, perhaps I should leave this crew.”

And with just that, something he did thought about asking of her all this time, she broke his pathetic illusion of being fine with her leaving this ship, this crew, her leaving him. 

He could hear her speaking, lips moving around an explanation of why it was reasonable for her to find a different way of traveling, as this tension was hurting the ship’s crew morale. He had the feeling that she was nervously rambling, looking for him to give an answer to her plans, but all he could do was stare back, mind fogging and words turning too confusing for his understanding, slight sensation of disconnecting his mind from the harsh reality of She will leave me. She will actually leave me.

Why did it hurt so much? How could she hold such a tight grip around his heart? When did he allow this to happen? Was him that weak?

“LAW! Are you even listening to me? Please!” Came a distinct voice, in the middle of the chaos of his mind. He might be panicking, the medic on him was saying, his cardiac frequency was too loud, he could feel his entire body tingling, legs too weak to answer, he was going mad. 

But what made it more maddening, was the idea of never seeing her again, never hearing her eyes shining with excitement, never hearing her amused smile to one of his witty remarks, to never again gaze at this person who turned his days brighter by existing and knowing she was safe as long as he lived. It was like she could take all his breath away with one realization, and it was certainly not pleasant.

Licking his increasingly drying lips, he tried to focus back in reality, understanding of the situation coming back to him, she was asking for his opinion, she wasn’t leaving yet. “You can’t.” Was what he could come off as an answer, with the turmoil happening inside his being.

“What do you mean I can’t?”

“You… I- Just. Don’t.” He could hear his breath quicking, and she seemed too, medical trained eyes sharpening on his form, advancing in his direction like one would a hounded animal - and he despised her for it. How easily she could read him, how open and vulnerable she made him. 

But he also came to realize, those feelings would never leave him, ever again. Her love crawled her way through his defenses, climbed his colossal walls made of years of traumatic experiences, and reached his closed icy cold heart. He wanted to hate her for it, make her stop, tell her off, let him be comfortable with his loneliness once again, but when she looked back at him with those warmhearted eyes of hers, reached both hands to gently graze his tattooed ones, soothingly asking if he was feeling well… He could only give all of himself to her.

Both arms shooting up to bring her body closer, head dropping to her shoulder, trying to hide the shameful sob tearing itself from his throat, body entirely shaking in a full panic attack triggered by all the experiences he had lived so far. For a moment he was back into the child he once was, an orphan, lost, utterly lonely, rejected by all.

His pride in shambles, broken mind taking over his more rational being, the only solace in the hands caressing his hair, the weight sitting on his lap - as he made her lose her foot with the surprise. But she didn’t mind, she loved this foolish broken man, even if he never bothered to ask. 

She would hold and love him for the rest of their life, if only he allowed it. 

“Breath, Law. Can you hear my voice, dearest? Breath with me.”

A few minutes of caressing his hair locks, firmly holding him toward her soft body, soothing whispering to his reachable ear, and the breath started to settle into a more even rhythm, the sobs that wrecked his body, turning into soft exhales, but the arms around her only tightened, like she would run away the moment he came back to his senses. 

It was devastating to see such a strong and resilient man breaking apart, never once expressing his feelings so openly before, all those years of suffering on his own breaking like a torrent of guarded anguish, pouring down from every pore, making his body weak and tired. But if anyone should’ve seen it, he was glad it was her. 

There was no judgment, no pitiful gaze, no questions to be answered, only a warm body and hands resting against damp cheeks, forcing his tired eyes to gaze back at an adoring expression, already grasping the situation at hand. “Law, don’t suffer on your own anymore. You don’t need to keep your thoughts to yourself, you are only hurting yourself.” She kept on, smiling with fondness. “I understand it’s hard to trust, to allow yourself to give in to strange feelings, but I will only leave you if you wish for me to. Ok? I promise, I want to stay and hear all that goes inside your head, I want to protect you as much as you've been protecting me. Would you let me do that?”

A hesitant nod. A progress, or an emotional response of someone who was just so tired of fighting back, so afraid of losing what he had been building, so hopeful of what it could mean to give in and embrace the sun. Either way, acceptance in the way his head fell back to her body, resting against her ample bosom, focused on the way the rhythm of her heart lulled him back to a better reality. He knew from that moment, he would try to improve himself, if it meant she would keep kissing the top of his head like this, caressing his back and humming a foreign lullaby to calm his raging heart. He could love her fully, if it always felt like this safe haven. And perhaps there was hope, if she was the one who held his heart.

#trafalgar law #trafalgar law x oc #trafalgar law angst #first OP fic in here? #dividers by cafekitsune #i guess can be read as law x reader too #rage writes

[rimouskis]

could you explain more about what you view as the before era and what you view as the after? i need to learn my herstory

I think this requires a more detailed and educated/researched answer than I can give after an exhausting workday and an after-hours work event, but I'm going to do my best and also open up the floor in reblogs for people to chip in their thoughts

foremost: a DISCLAIMER that this post does not aim to shit on writers from the "before" era. there are many classic fics that I love and enjoy, even if I consider their characterizations to be "less accurate"* than the ones we have in the after era.

*aside to say: accuracy is based only off of literal media accounts we have of these men; we do not know them, we should not claim to know them, and they have had different comfort levels with the media knowing selective truths about their lives [sid out of choice, geno out of media xenophobia] than they did when these early fics were being written.

"before" fics (which I tend to refer to as "classic" fics, and had their heyday in 2012-2013 but continued up until 2016ish) tended to have more regimented roles for sid and geno. sid was usually the protagonist; geno was the love interest.

this came with a cascading set of characteristics assigned to each guy. sid was poor-little-meow-meow'd. geno was the pursuer in the relationship. sid usually bottomed. sid had the whole spacetoaster moment (he was the inspiration for the term, haha). there wasn't much a/b/o fic but sid was, like, the omega-fied one and geno was alpha-ized.

something I've been thinking about more recently is how 2012-2013 era sidgeno displayed signs of Migratory Slash Fandom. I don't think of MSF as an inherently negative/condemning thing, but I think it's a phenomenon that deserves to be mentioned/analyzed, yeah?

MSF thrives on big character differences.... like, grumpy/sunshine, sarcastic/broody, genius/empath. it's all about emphasizing disparate archetypes to create natural tension in a story. this works really well in most romance novels! I love it!

the issues arise when people try to make characters fit into these preset dynamics. and, frankly, when sidgeno first got big, we straight-up didn't know as much about sid and geno. I mean that. despite sid being EXTENSIVELY covered by media from age, like, 14, he was really tight-lipped compared to what we have now.

and geno was.... there. I don't mean that as a diss—he was INCREDIBLE, but the media totally passed him over again and again. or they helped contribute to stereotypes of him being a dumb oaf who didn't know english.

aside: ironically I think that helped in creating sidgeno and not, like.... sidflower or sidtanger. geno was so "DIFFERENT" from sid (aka: russian, characterized by media as not knowing how to speak [in comparison to sid's highly curated media soundbites]) that it meant he was the best candidate for A Ship with sid.

a lot of the really big writers who got into sidgeno were fandom veterans with lots of experience in other big fandoms. to me, that means MSF had a hand in all this. and we should be grateful, because it led to the BOOM of hockey fic, and of sidgeno fic specifically. modern hrpf wouldn't exist without it.

that being said, those template ship dynamics, plus the media's attitude then towards sid and geno in its coverage, led to those characterizations of whiny soft sensitive boy sid who needed to be rescued even though he was the best hockey player EVER, and geno as the lumbering tall strong alpha not-that-bright Love Interest Man.

this isn't to say every fic was this way, or that this is BAD. I, uh, love poor-little-meow-meow-ing sid and omegafying the hell out of him. what I'm saying is that it was a near-ubiquitous characterization across the board.

that all changed in 2016-2018. I personally wholly credit sevenfists, though I imagine it's more nuanced than that, but: my blog, I make the rules here. I don't know if sevenfists was psychic or just highly observant and absolutely excellent at reading people (and that's basically the same thing, right?), but characterization shifts began taking place in fic....

and the coolest thing happened, in that those characterizations were seemingly reinforced by more media coverage. the back to back cups brought with them TONS of interviews with and media about the team, and sid and geno in particular. the coolest part of it was that sid had loosened up a LOT and geno had gotten more comfortable (and had gotten a reporter firmly on his side).

the interviews about sid post 2016 were just SO different. so much information started coming out, and a LOT of it conflicted with Ye Olde Characterizations. as it turned out, sid was deeply one of the boys. he was funny. everyone liked him. he loved hosting. he was insanely comfortable around almost everyone, including strangers, because he's a little freak who's kind to everyone. he can make smalltalk like no one's business. he's kind of gross. he likes to giggle and be in on jokes and get into the thick of it. he isn't some blushing virgin bride sold off of mario's doorstep, yeah?

and geno, too, was finally getting the coverage he deserved. and his personality was both fortified by age and better shown to us through media. as it turns out, he isn't some happy go lucky oaf. he's mercurial and intensely aware of what others think of him (and he CARES). he's sensitive and thoughtful but also can lash out at random times. he has a wicked sense of humor that he uses as a defense mechanism and as a surefire way to get people to like him, which matters to him. and, as everyone says, he is SMART.

if you had to boil it down, I'd say that post-2016, it became clear that SID is the confident one and GENO is the insecure one. and fic caught onto that with a miraculously fast pace. also: they're more alike than they are different, but I still think romance inherently feeds off of difference and tension, so we still exaggerate things to make the stories ✨WORK✨.

I'm not going to give examples of pre- and post- era fics, because I don't want to point any fingers and say someone was doing characterization "wrong." that's not the takeaway I want anyone to have here.

fandom attitudes have changed. it's been 10 years since that first wave of fics, and while I don't think that's very long, it's a hell of a long time on the internet, and in a niche internet community. what was once the standard for fics (and what was well-read, and what people gravitated towards) was different. not worse—different.

I think it's fair to say the "after" era of fics is more "accurate" to what we know of sid and geno. it's also fair to say that this is only the case because we have a WEALTH of information, character-revealing interviews and videos and anecdotes, that Ye Old Authors could only dream of getting.

I really love the story of how everything has changed, and it's a fabulous microcosm of fandom evolution and how approaches to fanworks have changed and grown with fandom, and I think it's all so so cool.

#additions welcome! #I also feel like I've made this post before lol #gather round children it's time for granny rimouskis to spin the tale of the sidgeno evolution once more

[creation-help]

Advice and tips on how to make your character feel more genuine/real

- Pettiness and shallowness. Obviously it can manifest in different ways, but IRL everyone has at least one or two little things that they're a bit surface level and "Just because!" about. Be it clothes, how they do certain rituals, what color m&ms they prefer ect ect. It can be little details or even major characteristics, and depending on which (and what) they are, it can be really telling about the character! Plus, it just adds a little extra depth and fun. Some examples including but not limited to: Being fussy over getting their clothes wet or dirty, only preferring some items because they look good, insisting on doing some action or tradition exactly a certain way, disliking an aspect of a thing or a person because they just don't like it, and so on. Obviously the big worldview points like morality and beliefs are very important, but when you've figured those out, take a moment to think about the smaller, everyday things your character feels about the world around them. No matter how good or wise a person is, they'll still always have some little thing that they can't give some profound noble answer to. Use this to your advantage to explore your character's shortcomings or flaws!

(In the same vein, Pet peeves is another detail that can flesh out a character!)

- How does your character perceive things? What do they notice about people first? How would they talk about, or describe another person to someone, if asked? How would they describe themself? And why? Just some things to consider. If your character maps out all the little details and deeply analyzes everything they see, it'll show in their interactions very differently than, for example, if they have the perception of a cabbage and are more oblivious than the love interest in a teen drama that the writers are stretching out for five seasons for no reason. Ykno.

- Additionally: what's their opinion of the people around them? Or if you've already mapped that out, what's their opinion of people they've never met before, or people who aren't in their immediate bubble, friends of friends, relatives of relatives, neighbours, or celebrities, mythical/historical figures and so on. Delve into hypotheticals sometimes, it can help you exercise your knowledge of the character. Even if none of these encounters or situations would happen in Canon.

- I'm sure you've already figured out what your character is most passionate about, ykno, whatever drives the story and impacts their relationships with other characters. But how about stuff they really don't care to think about? Just shrug? Not interesting? Doesn't pay attention to this? What is low on their priorities? It doesn't have to be negative (but can be!), it can just be "Meh", or something your character hasn't even noticed before, simply because it's not in their thoughtscape to think about.

- Does your character have any of those "What? I thought everyone did that/thought that/was like that!" - things? What do they take for granted, or weren't aware isn't a universal experience? Did they have a wildly different experience with something that most other characters hadn't even thought of? And yes I understand this is good for exploring trauma and other angsty things, but besides the obvious, think about maybe something that could be related to your character's species/living environment/abilities/opinions ect. This is great for exploring cultural differences, and anything that takes place in a fantasy setting. Very useful for villains and heroes alike! It's insightful. Everyone has small little perceptive differences or big and small thoughts that for some reason just haven't been properly challenged yet. Or brought up even. For whatever reason. Explore maybe what that reason could be, and figure out why it's been unchallenged for so long.

- Imperfections. Little divergences. It's fully possible to write a compelling and genuine feeling character using just archetypes, if you really explore them deeply. And whether you're doing that or not, think about the lines and molds you've set your character into, and let them spill out of them a little bit. Can be one huge aspect or one teensy detail, but make some diversion. Some crack in the picture. Doesn't have to be a flaw but can be! Just have some little aspects that set them apart and make the character themself. Get weird with it. Getting weird is one huge way you can truly make a character stand out and feel more unique and, oddly enough, genuine and real. Actual people have little oddities or things that don't line up with everything else about their person. And again it doesn't necessarily have to be anything big or shocking, in fact I'd argue it's even better if sometimes it's just a small, very ordinary, humanizing detail. Maybe unexpected, or maybe just something that doesn't factor into the surface image your character has. Think about characters similar to yours that you see often. What traits do they all share, or most usually have? Think about the kinds of people your character is inspired by. What are they often like? Make a diversion from that. Make multiple even? It can be the most random thing but think about it, even if you threw a dart at a wall of sticky notes, really chew out what this little thing says about your character. And focus on little cracks, imperfections, diversions and other odd details of your character. Over time they can grow bigger, or maybe not.

- Keep a clear picture of who your character is. Sounds obvious but I'll elaborate. Your character will obviously change and develop over the time you're working on them and whatever story events take place but I think it's very important to keep in mind who they fundamentally are. Basically I'm saying that try to keep them in character, yes even if you did drastic character development, you can still show that it's the same person in other ways even if one of their core traits was flipped. Be aware of what things will never change about your character no matter what they'd go through. Keep some consistency. Consistency matters alot in making a character seem genuine and, ykno, a good character. Even if that consistent trait is that they're inconsistent! The character can be that, yes, but as their creator, you should still keep sights of what's consistent for this character, you feel? If your character is a glunk of slime that slips out of it's container constantly and subsequently molds into whatever situation it gets put in, that's not really a character, that's.. Idk, plot device..? I know this may sound contradicting to my previous point but I fully think that, and this one can and should coexist.

You need to simultaneously be aware of the ways your character will differ from something and be fluid, and the ways your character will not bend, and cannot become. It's simply a matter of knowing their boundaries and restrictions, knowing which way they can lean and which way not. Obviously this'll be up to you as their creator, bc yeah you're allowed to drastically edit your character if you feel like it's for the better, but try to commit to that change then. Don't let the character slip from your hands, or let the story bend them into whatever shape it needs to make the plot go forward. Your character, and more importantly you, should be in control of that.

I emphasize the point of you controlling your character and not the other way around also. I've seen some character owners slip into "Well it's just what the character would do! I can't help it, it'd be out of character if they didn't do x!" even if the thing is completely awful, doesn't fit, or would ruin an aspect of the story. A smart writer will know how to work with your character's traits in a way that prevents them from running off the tracks and becoming their own little gremlin, while also complying with the story. Respect your character's.. Character, while also respecting yourself and the point of the story. This is even more crucial if it's a roleplay character, by the way..

I'm just saying, find ways to write the story in cooperation with your character. That means knowing what situations to avoid and which ones to steer for, in order to keep your character functioning with the plot and other characters. Sometimes you simply have to prevent some event from happening, or some characters from ever meeting, for the sole reason that it wouldn't make the story work the way it should. Or the way you want it to. You hold the pencil, be aware of what that means

#writing advice #Writing tips #character advice #writblr #Writing #character writing #Oc tips #Oc advice #character exploration #characterization help #writing help #writing tips #Help #important #story building

[syzygyzip]

The Soul Still Burns: Analysis of the Lords of Cinder (DS3)

What follows is a short essay on the Lords of Cinder from Dark Souls 3, exploring their symbolism on spiritual and metatextual levels. After that is a related reading of Slave Knight Gael, the final adversary of the Dark Souls trilogy.

The Lords of Cinder are in many ways the primary adversaries of Dark Souls 3. This title they share, “Lord of Cinder,” refers to a personage who has rekindled the first flame, keeping the cycle of light and dark going.

Cinder is a substance which continues to burn without the presence of fire but does not reduce to ash. So euphemistically, it seems that the Lords are somehow stuck in their process of purification, and the game suggests that the world is stuck along with them; this is why it is the Ashen One’s task to “set them upon their thrones”—to hurry them along and thus allow the world to follow its natural decline. As individual characters, each of these Lords represents a different attitude that complicates and prolongs the cycle.

Through these stubborn Lords the game is commenting on at least two things. On the metaphysical level, it reflects the Buddhist idea that certain attitudes keep people reincarnating over and over again, unable to extricate themselves from the material world of suffering (samsara). While on the metatextual level, the game is suggesting that certain attitudes keep players coming back to Dark Souls again and again, starting new games, making new builds and revisiting old files.

The idea there on the metaphysical side finds an easy analogy in Buddhist doctrine: the “three poisons,” the three root causes of suffering. These are hatred, greed, and delusion. What’s interesting is that these essential vices also fit pretty easily onto the different types of players that are being caricatured by the Lords. We’ll break these correspondences down in a second.

But First: Why Do They Correspond? So we have these sets of three. Three lords, three poisons in Buddhism, three types of Souls players. How convenient. When we analyze art, we sometimes ask, “Huh, is this structure really there, or am I projecting it into the material?” And if the structure is really there, baked into the work, that doesn’t mean that it’s due to developer intention. Archetypal forms sometimes show up in work via an unconscious influence, be it due to the cultural milieu, personal psychology, or some a priori biological disposition of the human being.

And the thing about Dark Souls is that it’s an unusually honest piece of art, in that its creative team allows their own free associations and intuitions to show up in the work without too much self-censorship or questioning. They make space for a mystery to show up on its own terms, and in leaving its riddles unanswered, there is more space for discovery by the people who play it.

It should also be said that cultural ideas persist for a reason. Beneath the ethics and ideology of the people who originally named the Buddhist “three poisons,” there may be something timeless, something perennially descriptive of human nature. If that is the case, then it would make sense for this same triplicity to unfurl itself in other cultural products. So for one reason or another, these three poisons, these addictions, show up diegetically in the characters and are also expressed in player psychology.

I say all this just because sometimes I feel very aware of the disconnect between much of Souls lore discourse and the broader field of mythological study. Since we are gamers first, there may be this tendency to want to “solve” the lore, but that’s not what we’re doing here. Myth functions because it elaborates our experience of the world through affective resonance; it attaches images and characters and stories which help us anchor our own prelinguistic impressions of the world, cultivating our sensitivity there.

Anyway, let’s look at these Lords.

Abyss Watchers Poison: Hatred The lore of the Abyss Watchers is pretty clear: they have an obsessive fixation on the abyss, and are ready to raze an entire town if they suspect abyssal encroachment. This obsession has literally possessed them, as they are now “abyss touched.” Gaze too much into the abyss, etc. They carry such strong contempt for the disavowed object that they don’t care what comes between it and their sword. This is clearly demonstrated by the fact that they are a brotherhood yet are unhesitatingly slaughtering themselves again and again. Hatred has made them blind, and has also caused them to resign their individuality (they are identical, mere instruments of a transpersonal grudge). They cannot die, their hatred keeps them locked in combat.

Type of Player: competitive | Interest: combat The Abyss Watchers are a representation of PvP addicts. They have no powers other than tenacity; they perform the same combos repeatedly. When you are really gripped by a PvP binge in Souls, you often end up doing the same thing again and again. The fight takes place in a mausoleum, on top of many chambers filled with human remains. The fact that this boss fight is instructional about combat, specifically about looking for tells (a cloud of dust always signifies the end of their combos) might be another clue. There is no limit to how good you get at Souls PvP; every foe is an opportunity to improve timing and strategy. You can just keep stacking anonymous bodies under yourself.

Aldrich Poison: Greed Aldrich invokes the concept of supremacy many times: he is in the supreme area from Dark Souls 1; in the supreme boss room of that area; he wears as a crown the former supreme lord of that area. This is because he devours lords; he tries to take prestige upon himself through acquisition and incorporation—greed.

Type of Player: completionist | Interest: content Aldrich is a commentary on completionist players. He is someone who “plays the game to death”, acquiring every object, reaching every achievement, devouring the soul of the game through taking everything into himself. He becomes bloated by consuming as much of the game’s content as possible. The old God whose likeness he has adopted is Gwyndolin, who was, in narrative terms, the one pulling the strings in the land of the Gods. And in gameplay terms, he is a secret boss. So on both counts we have someone who is elusive, and exists more or less at the boundary of the gameworld. When a player tries to see every last little morsel of a game, they become somewhat like Gwyndolin, a manipulator of a virtual world. If you know too much about a game, you have the risk of being less immmersed.

Yhorm Posion: Delusion In Buddhism, the poison of delusion secretly underlies the other two poisons, as the impulse toward hatred and greed are ultimately born of some false view about reality. This is akin to how the profaned capital sits below the rest of the kingdoms. To beat Yhorm you essentially have to “play pretend” with him, picking up a fake super-weapon, or fighting alongside Siegward, a knight who appears to be somewhat deluded about the state of the world, enthralled in the same fantasy as Yhorm himself.

Type of Player: lore researcher | Interest: meaning The profaned capital is full of statues—fixed images of myth; and empty goblets—treasures with no utility. Not to mention the area with the swamp which is full of symbolic imagery, but serves no narrative or mechanical purpose. The entire profaned capital challenges us to make sense of it; it is the ultimate temptation of lorekeepers in DS3. It throws at us a disproportionate amount of reference to DS2, which is famous among Souls players as the least thematically sensible Souls game. The Greatshield of Glory is found right outside Yhorm’s room, in a conspicuous room full of treasure, and yet it is a very impractical shield and offers very little lore value. If a lore-minded player picks it up, it directs them to a legendary personage from the War of Giants, which raises far more questions than it answers. The same is true of much of this area—the Eleanora, the Monstrosities, the Profaned Flame itself—they are all there to get you to speculate. These are the players who come to Souls games again and again, trying to find the “ultimate meaning.” They seek the grail, claim to find it, and then chuck in a pile with the others.

Yhorm's story also imitates the primordial Artorias myth: forsaking his shield in preservation of something more valuable. Other than that Yhorm is largely a cipher when it comes to biography, with a void for a face, which itself epitomizes what must remain at the center of mythology and storytelling: mystery.

Sit Down and Seek Guidance So we have the three reasons that people become fixated on Souls: the combat, the achievements, and the mystery. But there is a fourth lord of cinder boss, who is conceptually apart from these three: the Lothric Twins. They represent yet another kind of person who must keep playing Dark Souls: the developers. Lothric is striving to produce “a worthy heir,” a proper sequel to Dark Souls 1. The Princes are bound to their chamber as the developers are bound to their project, as that is their curse—“but you may rest here too, if you like.” In this context we can see their duality as the dual nature of having to work on the game and also play it to death. The privilege and the loftiness of the promise of a great piece of art (Lothric), and also having to go back "into the trenches" of the work itself (Lorian). Notably, neither of them can walk, they just teleport around. They are stuck at work, trying to bring the new world into being. Also I can’t go this whole essay without mentioning the obvious: that the Ashen One is bringing Lords to their thrones, and we players and developers have to assume our little chairs and couches when we access this world.

Playing Beyond the Point of Pleasure Of course the most extreme example of someone stubbornly remaining in the world no matter what is Slave Knight Gael. He is looking for pigment, which seems to be a euphemism for the substance of humanity (the Dark Soul). He wants to give it to the painter, the world-creator, so that a new world can be made. He is willing to indulge in a wasteland of abject violence for as long as it takes in order to renew something. Ironic that he is probably only prolonging the current world in his obsessive drive to recycle it faster.

Let’s examine the relationship between the figure of the painter and her relationship to Gael. That she is a spiritual entity is obvious: we never see her touch the ground, she is always in an upper room and lifted on a piece of furniture. Among other things, she is a clear metaphor for life springing eternally. A creative child who continues to paint despite kidnapping and imprisonment. She is the heart of the painted world, itself a place that symbolizes the idea of the representation of reality.

I want to make sure this is clear, because it is a bit of a kaleidoscope to consider. Any subject in Dark Souls stands for many things, but something that the painted world specifically represents is the very concept of representation. So of course the places in our imaginations are painted worlds, but so is this physical world of appearance, the maya of mundane reality. Not to mention that a work of art is a painted world, and the game we’re discussing is a painted world. When a work of art is able to recreate itself in itself, we can see this funny effect of mirrors reflecting mirrors infinitely. This results in seemingly inexhaustible symbolic content—there is so much potential to find meaning and create connections. Because Moby Dick represents a work of literature; the Tempest represents a play; Twin Peaks represents a TV show, these works can offer extensive insights not only into their medium but into the nature of reality. In these and other examples, the representation of the medium within the work may or may not be a single subject, but since Dark Souls is formally a game about levels and level design, the painted world is the heart of its self-reflexivity. The painted world can be pointed to as the summary of this fractal device. And the personification of that device, its ambassador to the player, is the painter.

The miracle or divine child is also an archetype familiar to us from Lothric, in their struggle to produce the “worthy heir.” Reality seeks salvation through the appearance of grace. They want it in a clear, incontestable form—to be able to point at it and say, "thank goodness we went through all that, because look, now here is the meaning, here is that which validates all that came before." In the world of Dark Souls 3 the religion of the masses is the Lothric stuff; meanwhile knowledge of the painted world is much more obscure. Lothric’s religion is obviously regulated and hierarchical, while Gael’s devotion to the painter is highly personal and private: he carries around a scrap of painting; he prostrates to a hidden idol in a small chapel; he considers the painter his family. He is emotionally close to the object of his worship.

But whether it’s Lothric or Ariandel, they are anticipating the divine child to redeem the world. As an archetype, the child ultimately represents surprise. The possibility of being delighted by life in its creative novelty. The child as an archetype appears in our own behavior when we do something without any sort of contrivance or mental interference, doing something in the world which doesn’t seem to have come from who we conceive ourselves to be. This is miraculous. Such an action enchants the world, and there is no explaining it, even if it may weave all kinds of stories around itself, retroactively framing things that have led up to it as portents or promises. (Though not exclusive to him, this trait is well-known in characterizations of Christ, and DS3 is clearly indebted to Christian iconography, so do with that what you will). Regardless of the specific cultural invocation, the divine child is a personification of something that happens within the human spirit. TFW you are renewed by a fresh and spontaneous engagement with life.

The grace of the miraculous often comes to us through play. Play is more of an attitude than an activity; the feeling of play may come to us through making a painting, or chatting with a friend, or moving around in a video game. We can play video games idly, competitively, experimentally, creatively, studiously, whatever, the feeling of “play” can show up regardless. We can sit there playing a certain game from a certain motivation, and feel totally rote and joyless, and question, “Why am I doing this?” Or we might sit there and play the same game with the same motivation, feeling totally lit up by it, its purpose to us obvious and self-validating. We are not even questioning why we are doing it, we are enjoying life.

This is really the ground that the miraculous tends to land on. Grace, meaning, and an immanent love of life are more likely to show up when we are in flow and not exercising our capacity for self-assessment. But like everything in life, we mistake the images and objects around us for the feeling of grace. Any given object might only be the catalyst once; it’s not about the object. This is extremely easy to see in cases of acute nostalgia; adults chase enchantment through collecting Zelda memorabilia or going to Disneyland, in pursuit of what kindled their spirit as a child. It was never really the game or the character that was doing it, it was what they were able to access within themselves.

So anyway Gael has yet to realize this. He thinks the Dark Soul is out there in something else. That it will be yielded as a drop if he just kills the right enemy, or 10,000 enemies, or goes to the right place at the right time. You can see that this is something of a synthesis of all the other Buddhist defilements: there are elements of completionism/greed, violence/hatred, mysticism/delusion. There is even the suggestion of the developer of these games again, in that Gael is a “slave,” forced into participation in the world to assist some creative apotheosis. (Isn’t it funny that his weapon is a worn-down executioner’s sword?—whether the person coding or the person playing, we are all “executing” command after command). The thing that really keeps him on the wheel is something beyond any of the player types and their vices; it is almost some sort of pure, amoral automatism, a churning drive that on one side resembles wanton nihilism, and on another side single-minded piousness. Is one disguised as the other, or has Gael somehow stepped beyond this binary? Yet another dichotomy in Dark Souls that begs to be reconciled, but whose tension creates the opportunity to participate creatively in its expansive mythology. When things are held apart we can move between them.

To really understand Gael, we have to contend with the question of a person’s relationship to their own soul, since that relationship is so plainly suggested by Gael and the painter. (This question, by the way, is much elaborated in Elden Ring, with its repeated foregrounding of the image of the maiden or “consort”). If we were to see Gael and the painter as partitions within one person--whether she is his soul, or his inner life, or his better nature, whatever—then in any case Gael is the side which goes out into the world and experiences it. He is the creative extension into the world as its active participant and realizer. Yet he is clothed as the warrior, the executioner. While the one who is dressed as the artist, the painter, just stays in her room and imagines the world—but this is where the magic of creation is really felt. We involve ourselves in life, or in a game, but we are only really changed and renewed when that exterior experience is “brought home” into the inner life. We do something “in the game,” but the act of “painting,” in renewing the world through our creative interpretation, is a decidedly interior experience.

#dark souls #dark souls 3 #lords of cinder #game entrainment #dark souls analysis #dark souls lore #ariandel #slave knight gael #the painted world

[broken-clover]

(Over)Analyzing the Cards in Johnny’s Joker Trick (Part 2)

Part 2 of 2. Here’s the original post for the sake of a more fleshed out explanation and for the Joker/King cards, but to keep it simple this is just for analyzing the cards used for every character in Johnny’s Joker Trick Overdrive to see if there’s any sort of symbolic or spiritual meaning that might be behind the use of that particular card. A lot of this uses cartomancy, which isn’t always as straightforward and clear-cut as something like tarot, but this is jus all in good fun

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Queens

Queen of Clubs- Shared between Sol Badguy, Ramlethal Valentine, and Bridget. And, first of all, let’s be real, Sol’s was first and foremost made for the reference. Queen is about 80% of his personality, if they didn’t use a queen card I’m sure he would have come to life and burned down the office. Outside of the Jacks, Sol is the only character who has a card that doesn’t match the character’s gender. Character-wise, Sol and Ram do have a bit of an overlap, being aloof, struggling socially, and having their interests fixate on a few things, but Bridget is a bit of an outlier here. The symbolism varies a lot, but generally is appears to lean into themes of self-confidence and self-reliance, as well as change. That is something that fits all three quite well, being powerful, independent and experiencing life changes (Sol attempting to settle down, Ram discovering more about being alive, and Bridget’s transition). In the Paris pattern, the Queen of Clubs is the only one not directly modeled after a historical figure, only being a generic queenly character. This may indicate a bit more open-endedness, as all three do care about identity and who they really are. In a more literal suite motif, Sol and Bridget do both primarily fight with blunt weapons, which could be seen as a metaphorical ‘club,’ and while Ram has swords, they often remain sheathed in battle instead of revealing the sharp ends.

Queen of Diamonds- Curiously, no character appear to be assigned to this one? Perhaps it is being saved for someone in the future.

Queen of Hearts- Shared between May and Jack-O Valentine. This is one of the more commonly-seen cards in this sort of motif, likely due to its inclusion in Alice in Wonderland. Because of this, it can have some dual symbolism, being a heart card that’s associated with a cruel, loveless, domineering figure. In a more general motif, both characters fit as being associated with romance and tying a lot of their character and plotline towards love and relationships with men (Johnny and Sol, respectively). The Paris pattern has the Queen of Hearts designed after the biblical Judith, a widow who saved Jerusalem by charming and killing a general that had previously sieged her city. Both characters have attempted to take the initiative to save a group of others (May running away from home in Xrd to keep her family from getting sick and Jack-O attempting to stop I-no at the cost of herself in Strive) which may also contribute. Both also command underlings in battle, which may contribute to the overall ‘queen’ motif

Queen of Spades- Shared between Millia Rage and I-no. This card has some symbolism directly from card games, as it is often viewed as being unlucky. It’s also given such flattering names as ‘the bitch’ in seven card stud poker and is often used as the old maid card as well. Both are characters who are frequently commented on for their beauty, yet have complicated issues with relationships in different ways. As a card it also tends to lead towards level-headed intellectualism and practicality, but is often less associated with emotions than the other queen cards. Both characters are often seen as cold and distant, intelligent and capable but lonely and closed off. The Paris pattern is designed after Pallas (Athena), goddess of war strategy and wisdom. In Greek mythology, the ‘Pallas’ epithet likely referred to the goddess’ battle proficiency, as it can be translated as ‘to brandish (as a weapon’) and while it is a fighting game, the two of them narratively encounter a lot of conflict with others

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Jacks

Jack of Clubs- Shared between Axl Low, Anji Mito, and Sin Kiske. Jack cards, in general, tend to have less symbolic meaning, but the Jack of Clubs tends to mention witty intellect and memory. All three characters are defined by personal memories that they treasure, though to varying degrees, and have a playful, trickster wit to them at times. It can pertain to luck and charisma that may also prove dangerous, and, at the very least, Anji does tend to his his glib words to cause trouble. On a note of consistency, Sin is of the same suite as Ky and Sol, making them collectively a three-card straight flush

Jack of Diamonds- Shared between Nagoriyuki and Giovanna. Curiously, both are newcomers to the series. This card tends to have an association with messages and messengers, which in a meta sense may refer to the newness that they bring to the game. There also seems to be repeated mention of a lack of loyalty and an unfaithful assistant, which could fit both in Giovanna’s blase attitude towards her work and Nagoriyuki’s role as an unwilling underling to Happy Chaos. 

Jack of Hearts- This card has the most people sharing it, being a four-way appearance between Faust, Goldlewis Dickinson, Testament, and Asuka R. Kreutz. This one also has a lot of heart-based themes similar to the King and Queens, often mentioning traits like kindness, good intentions, and sincerity. Though all four of them vary in many ways, their characters tend to involve sincere intentions towards others, though it might not always pan out the way they would have hoped (especially for Asuka). All four are definitely willing to show their emotions, especially when it comes to trying to bond with others, such as Faust with Ramlethal, Goldlewis with Bridget, Testament with Dizzy and Johnny, and Asuka with Raven. There is also a poetry motif with the card that depicts the Knave of Hearts as a trickster, and while all four are not necessarily trickster figures, Faust is known for his peculiarities, Goldlewis for his alien causing mischief in fights, Testament for being unpredictable in earlier games and mysteriously surviving several near-death instances, and Asuka being a mysterious and indecipherable problem-causer for most of the series. Also, in another consistency of the suites, Testament shares the heart suite with Johnny and May

Jack of Spades- Held solely by Baiken. Spade cards in general seem to veer towards more aggressive interpretations, and that definitely suits her just fine. It often mentions violence, though there is also mention of intense passion and ruthless determination, which also fit pretty nicely. It also tends to mention riskiness, either in the form of violence or unhealthy habits like drinking. Aside from the Joker and the King of Diamonds, Baiken is the only character to have a card all to herself, which may reflect the solitary nature she held onto for many years. Though, similar to the club and heart suites, she has a connection with Bedman and Delilah in the spade suite.

#this one feels a little looser than the last #but it was still fun! #sol badguy #ramlethal valentine #bridget #May #jack-o valentine #millia rage #i-no #axl low #anji mito #sin kiske #nagoriyuki #giovanna #faust #goldlewis dickinson #testament #asuka r kreutz #baiken #guilty gear

[insomniac-101]

Rose Tyler Character Analysis

Ah so Rose Tyler.

Rose " you like my gun?" Tyler who arguably, is one of the most important characters of the RTD era. A character so influential, that the narrative takes the time to mourn her absence and was single handedly responsible for bringing the series back from the dead.

She's so controversial. You either really love her or hate her, and I think that in itself is a testament to how well she is written. Because she left an impact, and that's not an easy thing to do in a series that has been around for so long

With that in mind though, I find that she is also the character that most people tend to misinterpret a lot. Often framing her in a bad light, rather than with the nuance required to understand her.

That being said I'm about to analyze the shit out of her character as well as some of her main relationships so if you love her, great I do too! Let's be friends! And if you don't, that's a shame but hopefully the way I interpret her journey will help you better understand why others do:)

I must stress that this is my interpretation but feel free to let me know if you saw a scene differently than me! Love reading alternate interpretations, me

Rose Marion Tyler is introduced to us in the first season of Nuwho as an ordinary girl. She has a job, a boyfriend, and a mother but from the way we are introduced to these facets of her life, we get the impression that she isn't necessarily someone that seeks to have anything more. She fits right in with said life and from an outside perspective, one can even argue that she seems content with it.

However it's in the moment where we see her come face to face with the impossible, that we really see who she is as a person.

When confronted with a group of living mannequins that slowly creep towards her , alone I must add, her reaction is one that is quite strange. Here she is, looking to fulfill a task in a completely dodgy and empty area below her workplace and when she sees something odd, she doesn't show fear. She doesn't scream, no on the contrary, she begins to try to rationalize what is happening in a manner that makes sense to her. Never one to assume danger, even when it is painfully obvious that there might be something strange happening.

That is when she meets the Doctor. A man unfamiliar and strange that saves her life right before she too succumbs to the threat. Thus, treating us to our first glimpse into the dynamic between our two leads.

She is visibly put off. Perhaps a little afraid but she asserts that the incident was nothing more than a prank. Something harmless and silly, even though it is quite obvious to us that that is not the case. It's this manner of viewing the incident that catches his attention however.

"Very clever, nice trick. Who are they then, students? Is this a student thing or what?"

"Why would they be students?"

"I don't know!"

"Well you said it, why students?"

"Cause to get that many people dressed up and being silly, they got to be students"

I find this interaction so interesting because it says a lot about her perspective. She doesn't assume the mob meant any harm. In fact, she goes out of her way to make up an even more incredulous scenario to justify their innocence, even when it is obvious that that is not the case. 

It shows nativity, but there's an underlying level of optimism there as well.

It is here where she finds out that Wilson is dead, and we see her react with concern. But notice, she doesn't assume he had anything to do with it.

Rather it's his tone that rubs her the wrong way, and she confronts the Doctor. Chastising him about joking about something so awful and even when he interrupts, she doesn't stop her pursuit for an explanation.

She is on the move right behind him, asking more questions that only seem to have more confusing answers. Following in spite of how absolutely bat shit his explanations are.

In this brief interaction, we see some of the most crucial aspects of her character. Her bravery, curiosity, and stubborn nature that allow her to remain by his side, long enough that he has to physically stop her and tell her to go home.

It is this blatant show of her character that prompts him to ask for her name.

Because here she is, confronted with the impossible yet she doesn't just stand to the side in shock. No, instead she chooses to engage with the Doctor. Trying to find a reason for what is happening, or in other words, a solution even if it's at the expense of her own well-being.

It's when we see her recovering at home, that the initial veil of an ordinary and perfect life is uncovered. Jackie is too busy on the phone to really offer any emotional support to her daughter. Gossiping on the phone about the incident, and in the minute a break presents itself, she uses that time to criticize her for not taking advantage of the situation.

I must stress that this interaction isn't included to say that Jackie is a horrible mother, quite the opposite, but she is human. RTD goes to show you that no one is perfect. That even the most well intended individual is flawed, and that everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. This is important to keep in mind when analyzing the relationships between the characters.

Even though Jackie doesn't show her support through words, she still takes the time to give her tea as she is sitting. She is doing the best she can under the circumstances in which she's in. She's conscious that their financial situation isn't ideal, and so by telling her that she should have asked for compensation, this is not to show that she is greedy, but rather it's her way of showing that she cares. That at the very least, her daughter can secure herself some money for experiencing the traumatic incident.

It shows that she's a realist, someone who views the world through a cynical lens and prioritizes survival above all else.

Similarly we meet Mickey, and he is a bit more emotional to an exaggerated degree. Showing physically that he cares with a hug and going out of his way to fuss and dote over her, but this overblown affection seems to make her uncomfortable. As if to show that she doesn't like being the center of attention, and that they are making her feel helpless at the expense of their concern.

Understanding her need for a distraction, he offers to take her to the pub but it's not long before she catches on to his true intentions. Granted he does appear to be genuine in his goal, but it's not an activity she would enjoy and so she tells him to just go alone.

Now similar to the previous point I made about the characters being flawed, that applies here too. The relationship she has with Mickey is not perfect. Mickey is trying to play the role of a perfect boyfriend. He is showering her in love and support, but we quickly see that his motivations are not completely selfless. That really that overblown affection he is showing at the moment, is an act. We see this happen again later when he tries to put on this front that he's her protector in front of Clive, but she shuts that down too. Not because she doesn't love him or appreciate the concern, but because it's not him, and this front he puts on sometimes results in him ignoring what she actually needs.

He assumes he knows what's best for her without taking into account that she might not agree. It's only when he shows that playful nature we saw earlier in the intro that Rose seems responsive to him. As if to show that it's when he's acting like himself, that she appreciates his company. Because what she needs at the moment is not for them to dictate what she should do, she just needs them to respect her decision to move on.

When he leaves, we finally see that the comfort she derives from him is really from the friendly banter they have. At the core of their relationship, is a friendship.

I find that way too many people tend to assume that everything Mickey does comes from a place of ill intent, and that is just not true. He's a person, and he too has his own motivations and emotions that may not always align with those around him. That doesn't make him a bad partner, just a flawed one.

When she wakes up, we see that yet again, she is subjected to more fussing from her mother but it is in this interaction that something interesting about Jackie is revealed.

Jackie claims that her prior job at the mall was giving her "airs and graces" and this is something she tends to bring up later too, when she feels herself becoming more distant from her daughter.

This is a reflection of Jackie's own insecurities, not Rose's actual attitude.

Whenever she sees Rose find a piece of the world to call her own, she tends to put it down. Not because she hates seeing her succeed, but because she fears that once she finds something better she'll leave her behind. That she will have to experience loss once more, at the expense of her daughter rather than her husband all that long ago.

Now this is an assumption that on her part, I'd argue, is a bit unfair given that Rose doesn't ever really show to resent where she comes from. (in Tooth and Claw, she is even named  "Dame Rose of the Powell Estate". Which shows that she is not really one to shy away from her background) Nor does she believe herself to be better than anyone, but Jackie uses it often because she knows it elicits a reaction out of her. She's grown so used to having her around, that now she can't fathom living without her and resorts to hurting her as a means of keeping her close. 

It's an attachment to her daughter that at times, can prove to be stunting to Rose's development but ties back to the long lasting grief she feels at losing Pete. Again this is not an intentional thing she does, but it is a flaw that exists and shows up when they butt heads.

(I stress this point because I've noticed that this Era of Doctor who in particular has many instances where characters declare something, only for it to be a false conclusion. It's vital that one considers not only the words, but the actions of said characters. To read into their words, rather than to take it a face value. I will be doing a lot of that here, case in point)

Rose often has to put up boundaries with Jackie. Not because she doesn't love her, but because the extent of her love and attachment can be overbearing to the point that it interferes with her life. They have survived so long by functioning as a unit, but now it's time for Rose to prioritize her own feelings and that in turn scares Jackie.

I must stress that Rose is still so young, only 19. For her to have the maturity to know how to handle her mother as well as handle the household (we see her fussing over the cat flap, demonstrating that she is constantly aware of the circumstances they live in) shows that she had to grow up fast. Being constantly aware of adult concepts such as finances and the death of a parent from a young age, tends to do that to a kid.

Now skip ahead to when nine stumbles upon her home, and she manhandles him inside lol. She takes control of the situation, offers him a cup of tea and asks him to accompany her to the police station so that they can both handle the situation.

I must stress, once again, that she has no reason to assume he's a good person. For all she knows, he could have purposefully caused the explosion to kill them all. But no, she assumes that he was just a victim like herself and aims to bring closure to the incident.

Rose is someone that assumes the best in people. We see this time and time again with how she interacts with those around her. When she is talking about the body that was found, she assumes it's Wilson and talks about how sorry she is that it happened to him and that he was a nice bloke (even though her face tells the opposite lol).

She is kind. It's in her nature to care for and care about others. It's because of this that she is able to get through to the Doctor when he tries to leave again.

So she insists that he tell her what's going on, and continues to pursue him while making conversation. At one point he asks if she believes him and she admits that she doesn't, but nonetheless she continues listening. 

A kind act she then does for Clive, which suggests that the reason why she stays is because she recognizes that everyone wants to be heard. That to be acknowledged, means to finally feel validated. Something that seems to be absent from her life, given how often both Mickey and Jackie tend to dominate conversations regarding her decisions.

She gives him the space to joke around, to add levity to the discussion but the moment he confesses that he is alone she stops it.

Because she is concerned now. He, a complete stranger yet she offers him the patience to go at his own pace. All while, she is firm in her pursuit for an answer but not at the expense of upsetting him.

This is why they work.

She has the emotional intelligence that he lacks. She challenges him by offering a perspective that completely goes against his own. And when he's being insensitive or too focused on the big picture of things, she is able to put him in his place. Reel him back in and set him straight again.

(I did a more in depth analysis on the 9th doctor here if you're interested!)

It isn't until after she leaves Clive that we see her actually start to reconsider the direction that her life is going in. Because now more than ever, she realizes just how narrow her perception of the world really is. How insignificant her life is, in the grand scope of the universe.

She reminisces, talking about how she could go back to school now that she has the extra time to spend. Another decision, mind, that was done on behalf of someone else and she is starting to regret.

She asks for Mickey's opinion but him not actually being him, isn't able to give his input and changes the subject.

"I'm sorry, was I talking about me for a second?"

Her offense is something that stands out to me, however.

Based on prior interactions, one can come to the conclusion that Rose is not as open as she appears to be at first glance. When Mickey attempted to appease her by offering her the space to talk about the explosion, she shut him down and later on refused to include him in her meeting with Clive. She even went as far as to lie about her prior involvement with the Doctor to her mother. Which in turn suggests that it's not often that she has aspects of her life that are solely hers and so, when she finds something, she keeps it to herself.

This could be due to a number of reasons, but I suspect it is because of the company she keeps around.

Her mother criticizes her job and asks her to change it, and Mickey dissuades her decision to go looking for Clive. She keeps things close to her chest because she's aware that the people in her life won't often support them.

Then the Doctor interrupts, and Mickey is revealed to be a clone. Panic arises but her being the selfless person she is, presses the fire alarm as a means of ensuring that more people won't get hurt. This also shows one of her biggest strengths as a character, she is incredibly clever. Even though she dropped out of school at a young age, she has a knack for finding solutions with very little resources. She's sharp and has a level headed approach that makes her perfect for a crisis. 

It also shows that she has a habit of putting others before herself, because before Mickey even attacked, she was already standing next to the button.

Her compassion, bravery, and quick thinking are what ultimately drive her to save the Doctor's life. Because I'm spite of being in trouble himself, he pleads that she save herself at the price of his own life. Proving to her, that he is not responsible for the death follows him. And in turn she realizes that the life she is living is truly stunting her, because it's her putting faith into her own capabilities that allows her to save him.

That she, just like the Doctor, is capable of doing something beyond what she thought was out of her reach.

That she is free to live a life not constrained by the ordinary.

Now I'll skip ahead to the big decision; the one that seals her fate as his companion and a decision I often see people misunderstand. The decision to stay with the Doctor is not one that comes easily. Her initial rejection of his request is one that displays her hesitance.

Note that it is not because she doesn't want to, that much is evident from the way she's gazing longingly at the Tardis. But because Mickey's pleading is getting to her. He is latching onto her, metaphorically and literally; not taking the time to consider how she might feel about the opportunity.

He does not trust that she knows what's best, which is made evident in the way he often doubts her.

Up until now Rose has been someone that puts everyone above herself when it comes to making decisions. She has to consider their feelings, to the point that she feels the need to hide things from them.

Her mother.

Mickey.

And now she's going to let them snub out that little spark she just discovered she has.

It's because of this that she thanks Mickey before she leaves. Because it's his helplessness that helps her realize how fit for a life of thrills she is. While he was cowering, she in turn was thriving in the danger.

Him doing nothing but clinging to her, made her realize that she is capable of doing so much more than what she could do at his side. That she has the potential to save many lives and make a difference in the world.

So she leaves.

She is not angry at him when she does, quite the opposite, it's him being true to himself in a crisis that puts things into perspective.

The next episode makes her confront the reality of the path she has chosen.

He takes her to the end of the world and she realizes that her role is not to stop the inevitable. The Doctor is not someone that is responsible for preventing bad things from occurring, no, he is a witness to them just like she is.

This confession comes with the loaded realization that not every adventure will end happily. That death is not something that can be avoided and that the Doctor is not a hero. This shows her naivety, and through this adventure, she begins to lose some of it.

She freaks out at seeing the "relics" of the human race. All things she is familiar with, yet, it comes with the startling realization that everyone is dead. 

That she is the last of her kind alive.

So she runs.

In spite of it all being such a shock to her, however, she still has the ability to reach out to someone. Finding comfort in talking to an alien by the name of Rufalo, and asking for her name and background. Extending kindness to someone that she doesn't have to, because it in turn brings her happiness. It shows she is someone that cares for others, regardless of what they look like. That at her core, she is kind and considerate.

One of my favorite scenes that perfectly demonstrates this point is an underrated scene where she talks to a plant. She previously observed that one of the aliens that initially greeted her is a tree descendant that gifts her a piece of her grandfather, and she addresses it shyly.

"Hello, my name's Rose, that's a sort of plant. We might be related..I'm talking to a twig."

It's played for laughs but it demonstrates that her ability to want to understand others comes from a place of wanting to relate to them. She talks to the tree with respect and views it as an equal before realizing that it's just that, a twig.

When the Doctor finds her and begins to appease her by making jokes at the expense of the aliens, she once again surprises him with her reaction.

She gets offended.

All on behalf of the deep south aliens that cannot defend themselves in the current moment from his scrutiny, because she is able to humanize them. To see them as people, in spite of the obvious differences they may have.

This suggests that Rose's first instinct when out of her element, is to try to understand and sympathize.

That way of being, is what causes her to turn her questions on him.

Why he is so quick to judge others.

Why he is able to maintain that sense of levity as he sees the world burn.

And why he seems so touchy about his background.

Something that I wish to add, because we have an instance of this happening in this episode, is that her need to understand others might be rooted in the perception others seem to have of her. People tend to diminish her value because of how she looks. In this episode, Jabe, the tree lady presumes that Rose is the doctor's concubine or even a prostitute. This is why she gets offended and tells them both off.

(This happens a lot more than I realized on my first watch, and a lot of people write it off as her being jealous when that's not the case. That isn’t to say that she doesn’t display some jealousy at times, but it genuinely does not occur as often as people claim it does)

This is also why Cassandra gets under her skin so much. Because she presumes that Rose is inferior and looks down on others but that alone is not enough to justify her being killed. She makes that clear when she pleads for the Doctor to save her.

We also get some insight on why her dad's death left such an impact on her. It's brief but while watching the earth melt away, she says this:

"it's gone, we're too busy saving ourselves no one saw it go. All those years, all that history and nobody was even looking."

Even though she didn't know him personally, the fact that he died alone is something that deeply troubles her. To anyone else he was just a man, yet to her and her mother he was a father, someone that was meant to be a part of her life. He should have had someone there, just like how the earth deserved to be remembered in its final moments by those who personally lived in it. To die without anyone you care for acknowledging your importance must be haunting.

The reason why she stays with the Doctor is for the same reason why the tragedy of her father's death deeply affected her, she doesn't want him to be alone. Loneliness can be so terrible. Had it not been for the Doctor being with her, she would have felt overwhelmed by the weight of the world's end. It's having him there that made the pain bearable. She understands this, and so, she takes it upon herself to be the person he has to look his way. To be the hand he has to hold when everything becomes too much.

But the question remains, to what extents is she willing to go to ensure that he will be okay?

Gradually we see Rose become more confident in her ability to command and reason. She no longer hesitates to step in and offer her perspective, all while she continues to extend her kindness to others. This at times, clashes with the Doctor's own priorities but nonetheless his exposure to her has an effect.

It is in the episode Dalek however, where that kindness takes on a new form, a merciful killing. Up until now Rose has been the one to tell the Doctor to give the perpetrators a second chance. To see the good in others even when it's difficult.

But now this creature that has killed many, is changing. It's growing aware, disturbed, and it's all because of her. She stops the doctor from killing it, but now the creature wants to die. It does not want to become like her. It does not want to become so human that it becomes aware of all it's done and how lonely it is.

For the first time, she is made to confront that her kindness might have just condemned someone to a more miserable end. That humanity is not something that every creature strives for, and that at times the kind decision comes with a price.

So she does what it asks, and orders it to die. Saving the Doctor from sullying his hands with more blood but at the price of her own becoming unclean. Are these the depths to which she would go to ensure the Doctor's wellbeing?

The next two episodes explore what happens when Rose underestimates her ability to make mistakes.

She's become more confident, taking along Adam to their next adventure because she believes she has a good judge of character. Plus he’s kind of pretty, so that’s a plus for her lol

She wants to be the impressive one now and share that wonder for the universe with someone else. To see what it looks like from the perspective of a new pair of eyes, because to her it has all become kind of normal.

The price of understanding the Doctor more, is that it comes at the price of her humanity. She will no longer be able to sustain her naivety towards how cruel the world can be. It will become harder to judge when she is viewing things in a rational human way, or through the eyes of someone that has grown desensitized to the chaos.

In retrospect, I don't think it's a coincidence she is wearing red here. She has now witnessed a death at her hands, and she is trying to regain control. To remember what it's like to view the world through the eyes of someone normal like Adam.

With time, she will grow to be a stranger amongst other humans. She will have a harder time relating to others because her understanding of the world far surpasses there’s. 

Oh but Adam is not like her. Because she assumes everyone is well intentioned, she fails to realize that he might hold ulterior motives. When he fails her, she realizes that she is also capable of making a bad call. That the Doctor is holding her to a standard and if she makes a mistake like Adam, she too can be left behind.

Father's day is where we finally see her make a misstep and it's one hell of a problem. Her initial goal was to be there for her father and comfort him in his final moments, but she realizes quickly that seeing it is far more disturbing than she had initially anticipated.

He's her father. Seeing him die once is bad enough, but twice? All while fully aware that she can easily prevent it? It's a temptation that is far too great to pass up. But quickly she realizes her mistake and she can't think rationally, she is far too emotional to reason with.

"but he's alive,"

"my entire planet died, my whole family. Do you think it never occurred to me to go back and save them?"

"but it's not like I've changed history, not much. I mean he's never gonna be a world leader. He's not gonna start world war 3 or anything"

"Rose there's a man alive in the world who wasn't alive before. An ordinary man. That's the most important thing in creation."

She overestimated what she understood about travelling in time. She realizes this, but her pride will not let her stand down. She wrongly uses his loneliness as a means of keeping him there, knowing that he would never actually leave her but alas he does. In doing so, granting her a once in a lifetime chance to get to know her father personally.

With this opportunity comes the realization that her father was not the man her mother told her about. 

Not successful nor heroic, but flawed like any other man.

She finds out that he and Jackie had a strained relationship, nothing like the perfect relationship her mother described. That he had had an affair and that they were not on the best terms when he died. Really, her mother was protecting her from the reality of the situation. All for the sake of giving her a father figure that would not disappoint her, even in death.

But on the flip side, she is also able to know the best parts of him. Now she has a reference of who he was at his best as well. She is able to have him recognize her as his daughter and when he realizes the extent of her mistake, he takes on the responsibility to right her wrong. So that his blood is not on her hands, and so that she will remember him as the proper father he would have been after he’s gone. 

Note that he does this for her, not because she wouldn't have eventually asked it of him, but because he doesn't want the guilt of his second death to be on her.

She apologizes of course, to the Doctor but not before he does the same. It is in this moment, that she realizes how much she means to him and in turn, how much he means to her. 

When viewing this scene, once should keep in mind that the episode draws many parallels between the Doctor and her father. At one point, it states that she considers the Doctor to be the most important man in her life. so when her father comes along, in misplaced anger she asserts that the Doctor did not want her father to live because it would threaten his importance to her.

The reason why I draw attention to this detail is because I believe this is the episode where she realizes she loves the Doctor romantically. 

When her father touches her face as he recognises her as his daughter, she nestles into it like a little kid seeking comfort from a parent. Now that she knows what it feels like to have a proper father, she has a better understanding of what that kind of love feels like. 

So when the Doctor does the same thing, she stares deeply into his eyes as if just realizing what he means to her. Her reaction to him is almost shy and stiff, very unlike her usual temperament.

I think this is the moment she realizes her feelings for the Doctor are not that of her trying to fill a void her father left, but of a different origin entirely. The reason I say this is because these two scenes, mirror each other down to the camera angle. With both shots, focusing on her reaction to the touch.

I don’t think it is a coincidence that earlier in the episode, she gets mad when her father assumes the Doctor is her boyfriend. She even expresses confusion on why people think they’re together, which wouldn’t really make much sense if she had felt romantic attraction to him prior to this moment.

This isn't to say that she purposefully projected such an image onto the Doctor, not at all. But I think it's this experience that finally gives a name to what she was feeling for him all along. Something that started off as platonic but eventually morphed into romantic love.

(I can’t believe that I just claimed Rose might have daddy issues but here it is. On the bright side though, this goes to prove that the Doctor fell for her first so do as you wish with that assertion lol)

Then Jack appears and finally, their attraction for one another becomes obvious to everyone but one another lol. This is where the whole dancing scene happens and I think you all know what they meant lol I don't have to make an in depth analysis about it. 

(But how curious that she suddenly starts being more blatant with her flirting, after Father’s Day? Just sayinnng)

I must stress now, because this will become critical later on, that Rose is naturally very flirty and touchy. She's like that with most people it seems, but she never really means anything by it. When Jack appears, she finds him attractive but when he starts getting too close she begins to feel uncomfortable. 

She even stops his advances at one point. She likes being liked, even plays into it, but she never acts on her attraction. It's a flaw of hers in the same way the 10th doctor likes being chased by beautiful women, but she's never unfaithful.

Okay so I'm going to say something really radical here, but Boomtown is when Rose and Mickey breakup. For good. Personally, I am not of the belief that they were together in season 2.

The reason why I say this is because the moment Mickey and Rose are left alone, all she can do is recount stories about the Doctor and how great their adventures are. It is here where we see what was pointed out to us previously: that she would eventually outgrow the outlook of those around her. She is no longer the Rose he knew, or fell for. She has grown more confident, happier, and can no longer relate to him. 

In other words, she has outgrown him.

It’s here where Mickey tells her that he is seeing someone else. 

Rose does become a little jealous here, making a comment about the girl's weight, but she quickly realizes it's not appropriate and takes it back. Instead, commenting that she's a nice girl. 

Now remember how I mentioned that at the core of their romantic relationship was a friendship, we see that here more than ever.

When he suggests they find a hotel, she reminds him that he has someone and then questions why he is even with Trisha if she’s not the girl he usually goes for. (They grew up together, so it makes sense why she would know what his type is). This doesn't seem as if she's asking because she's jealous but because she's confused on why he's settling for someone. 

She is concerned for his wellbeing.

To which he admits he is and that he can't move on because he is still in love with her. When he asks if he wants him to wait for her, she can't answer. Not because she is unsure of her answer, but because she knows what it is. Her heart is no longer his.

Her running at the sound of trouble and refusing to answer is the answer. It will never be him. She cannot promise him something that just isn't what she feels anymore. Him yelling that “of course it will always be the Doctor”, is him confirming it. That what they had, has ended. 

This is the moment they break up. Her seeking him out afterwards is not her trying to mend the romantic relationship they had, but the friendship.

But it is too late.

When she returns after the Slitheen crisis ends, he is no longer there. He will not wait for her anymore and when asked about his whereabouts, she concedes that he will not join them when they leave because he deserves better.

This is her acknowledging that she did wrong in having him wait. She cries because it ended in such a heartbreaking way, but not because it is no more.

She realizes she hurt him, and this guilt follow her into season 2.

The reason why I am so confident on this is because they’re never really all that affectionate after this. Yes they hold hands and hug, but that’s something she did with the Doctor long before they were together. They never share a kiss, and the only one that ever refers to their relationship as something more, is the Doctor.

(Who I must add, has his own motivations for doing so. Mainly out of jealousy, and because it creates a barrier between the Doctor and Rose's relationship. I swear, you can't trust these people lol)

That's why her attachment to him never really presents itself as an issue later. Weeell not until the Doctor inserts him as a means of putting a wedge between the two of them. But I am getting ahead of myself here.

Skipping to the final episode, Rose is tricked into leaving the Doctor and she is left to confront what life without him is like.

This is the girl who, at the thought of her father dying alone, almost broke the universe to grant him some companionship in his final moments. 

He is dying out there, somewhere she can't reach.

And in the meantime, she waits helplessly as the man she loves is trapped in the future, unable to do anything but mourn him.

For the first time, we are confronted with a version of Rose that is devoid of any hope. A sight so unfamiliar to both Mickey and Jackie, that they don’t know what to do or say to make it better. 

That does not stop them from trying, however.

It's here that Jackie is able to admit that she admires him for doing what he did. This confession is a big deal because it highlights the beginning of a major change in perspective for her. 

The reason why Jackie and the Doctor’s relationship is so strained to begin with, is because she feared that he would be the catalyst to Rose’s eventual departure. She projected her insecurities onto him, often portraying him as the type to endanger her daughter on purpose and the reason why her life was such chaos. Yet, in this moment she concedes that she was wrong, that the Doctor is more noble than she had initially given him credit for. 

He's not selfish like she initially presumed, but selfless; choosing to prioritize her safety, over his own loneliness.

When Rose questions what she is expected to do now, Mickey is offended. He cannot understand the extent of her feelings, so he resorts to the defensive. Claiming that she must a sense of superiority if she thinks she is not capable of assuming a normal life like anyone else. But just as was shown before, both him and Jackie are very flawed people. They have their agendas and so they impose what they think is best onto her, without considering their own biases.  

Because they care, they assume rather than listen ... but she's no longer the same Rose.

She is different. 

No longer naive and no longer fit to live a life that doesn't have him in it. Not solely out of love, but because she felt she was at her best there.

"it was a better life, I don't mean all the traveling and... Seeing aliens and spaceships and things, that don't matter. The Doctor showed me a better way of living your life."

She criticizes Mickey for assuming the worst of her in that moment, as he has seen first hand the change she went through. That's why they broke up after all, because that change made her harder to hold onto.

With that change however, is the realization that living a normal life would mean to throw away all the growth she went through. 

To abandon her new sense of purpose, and lose that part of herself that refused to give up. The side of her that held onto hope, in spite of all odds being against her.

And finally, to give up would mean to lose the Doctor: the man that believed in her and never stopped.

When she says there's nothing left for her there, on earth, she means it. She would rather die than live a life without him in it. 

She's an emotional wreck at the thought of losing him but other than it just being a statement said in the heat of the moment, I find that she might also have a point.

Sure it's harsh, I won't deny it but really other than her mother, what is there to keep her there? 

Everyone, even ordinary people, leave home eventually. That is just reality. Her mother is there, yes, but one day she will die. Rose will be all that’s left, because not even Mickey will measure up to the Doctor and it is unfair to expect him to fill his place. 

She will be expected to live a life where not even one person understands her and in the process, forget the part of herself that she grew to love.

What they're asking of her is to give up on the part of the world that she has made her own. To hide the spark that made her into who she is, because that's how much the experience has become a part of her identity as a person.

It's selfish, but doesn't that apply to everyone? Who's happiness has not come at the expense of other people? By asking her to give up her life with the Doctor, are they not doing the same to her?

The reason why knowing that she met her father seemingly changes Jackie's mind is because the revelation is a confirmation that Rose has grown up. Her distress is not out of a naive love that Rose holds towards the Doctor, no, she is aware of the implications of what she is saying.

The reason why Jackie never told her the truth about her father is because at the time, she was a little girl who could not understand that her dad was not a perfect man. She meant to protect her innocence, even if it came at the expense of the truth.

But she realizes then, that she is not that little girl anymore. That before her stands a young woman, who no longer needs her protection. One who has accomplished impossible feats on her own merit, and grew not because of her, but in spite of her.

So when Rose tells her that she has found her place in the world, she means it.

Not to mention, the Doctor was able to give her a sense of comfort that not even she could give her. Granting her a sense of closure and thus cementing just how incredible of a life she is leaving behind. 

Jackie’s own fear of abandonment, is not enough to blind her to how important of a task this is to Rose.

This is why they help her in spite of it potentially meaning her death. Because to ask her to leave it all behind without trying, would be the equivalent of killing her. The version of herself that was forged from the experiences aboard the Tardis.

Season 2 is effectively what occurs when the reality of falling for a man indebted to the universe, starts to settle in.

His regeneration makes her confront the fact that he is unlike any human man. That the rules that define human relationships, will not apply to their own. With that in mind, she seemingly loses her footing amidst the chaotic revelation. 

She struggles to take control of the alien invasion, not because she doesn't know how, but because everything she knew to be true has changed. The foundation of all she stood for, has been broken and she has no idea what her place in all of it is.

When she realizes that he is still him, her acceptance comes with the acknowledgment that their circumstances have changed. That she will have to accept those alien aspects of himself, and redefine her prior assertions of what a life with him would mean in the long run. Because now more than ever, the love between the two of them is stronger than ever. But neither is willing to sacrifice the greater good for it.

Something I need people to understand is that the reason why their relationship doesn't become anything more than a friendship, until Tentoo, is because both are aware that his duty is something he can't abandon. It's a conscious decision on both their parts, not just on Tens.

We see this time and time again when Ten is made to confront the possibility of her death. She is not immune to the misfortune of the world and she knows this. But just because she's aware of this, doesn't mean that she lets it stunt the enjoyment of her life.

This is where their perspectives drastically differ. On one hand you have ten who recognizes that he is not human. The world is cruel and to give in to his love for her would mean losing her eventually. This is why after he is confronted with Sarah Jane, he can't bring himself to describe why she is different. 

Why she is his exception.

So he brings along Mickey to act as a buffer. This is why Rose seemingly disagrees with his idea to bring him along. Her and Mickey are just friends. He still has feelings for Rose, she knows, and to involve him is to give him the impression that he still has a chance. Again, it's not out of jealousy. If it were, she wouldn’t have been so keen on bringing along Sarah Jane Smith after this adventure or Mickey in season 1.

At the price of his comfort, he cruelly doesn’t consider Mickey’s perspective. 

She makes this clear later on when he asks why he was tempted to explore Pete’s world.

“Mickey’s mum just couldn’t cope. His dad hung around for a while, but then just sort of wandered off.He was brought up by his gran. She was such a great woman. God, she used to slap him! But then she died. She tripped and fell down the stairs. It’s about five years ago now. I was still in school.”

“I never knew”

“Well, you never asked.”

“You never said.”

It is his inability, ironically, to not think beyond his best interests that has a tendency to hurt those around him.

The funny thing is, the episode where she is supposed to act jealous and petty is actually the episode where we explore why Rose is such a great match for the Doctor. Because even though Madame de Pompadour belittles her importance to the Doctor and seems to be the main focus of his affectons, Rose still does what she can to save her.

This is who she is. 

Yes, she can be emotional at times but when it really matters, she can put those feelings aside to do what is right. This is something that we see develop in her since season 1. It shows that she is aware of the duty the Doctor has to protect time itself, and it's here that we see her take an active part in it herself.

When Mickey taunts her out of jealousy of their relationship, asserting that the Doctor's intentions are not as pure as she thinks they are, she is quick to defend him. Because she understands that he is not someone that intentionally hurts others. No, he is flawed and his duties are too important to be held to a human standard.

That isn't to say that she is immune to falling victim to the same dark assumptions.

(We see this plainly in the prior episode too, where Mickey's taunts begin to get to her and she assumes the Doctor doesn't value his companions)

It hurts her. You can see that, in the way that she stares longingly into the distance. Coming to terms with the implication of having been left behind, and her role in his life. She will never be his priority. Not when he is the only one left, to ensure that the world won’t plummet in the absence of his own people. 

It is this reasoning that allows her to look beyond herself and reach out to him when he is grieving the loss of Reinette. To ask him if he’s alright, even if its at the cost of her own feelings.

“I’m always alright.”

It is here that she realizes how much he is holding back. How much the constant death is weighing over him. And so, she gives him the space he needs in the meantime. Displaying that strength she has, at the cost of seeing the Doctor at his weakest.

I think this is why in the next episode, when they are trapped in an alternate universe, Ten is seemingly afraid that he might lose her. I mean, to an extent that seems almost overblown but, it makes sense if one infers it's because of how he acted in the prior episode.

 Not only because he seemingly put a wedge between the two of them, but also because more than ever she is aware that his duty is to the universe and not to her. He realizes the extent to which he has taken her love and loyalty for granted. 

How more than ever she is aware that whatever is between the two of them, will never be.

(Personally I see this as his punishment for being so careless in his actions in the prior episodes. Till this day, I still can't watch that episode without feeling so bad for Rose)

His fear is a reflection of his own insecurity: that alien side of him that is incapable of understanding why Rose would choose him above all else.

Rose is not one that would ever hold it against him, however. For the sake of blaming himself, he underestimates the depths of her awareness to the situation they're both in.

She loves him unconditionally. She doesn't expect him to drop his duty. No, more than ever she is aware of the toll it takes on him, from a second hand perspective. 

This is why in Doomsday when Jackie criticizes her for becoming too alien, and for not settling down, she stresses that she will never have a normal life because the Doctor never will. It was never the traveling that made her stay, it was him. The thought of him facing the world alone, to revert back into a miserable version of himself because he has no one to ground him, is a reality she can't live with.

(not to mention, her becoming too desensitized to the life she lives is a problem that can be traced back to season 1 as well. Showing that this is very much a real thing that can happen if she doesn't maintain something that grounds her to the human world)

So she takes it upon herself to be there for him when he hasn't asked. This is incredibly selfless and consistent to her character since season 1.

So when she seeks out Pete, she's not really doing it with the intention of staying. She's curious to see who her father is in a universe where he seemingly lives. Because to her, he is her father regardless of whether or not the body he is in is the original. This universe's versions of the people in her life does not make them any less valid simply because they're slightly different, at the core of them is the people she loves. 

In every universe is a version of the person she loves that when prompted, will save her. This is seen in how it's seemingly these two versions of her parents that do something to help her even at their own expense. With this Pete, being the one to save her before she gets sucked into the void and this Jackie, being the one to save them both from an immediate conversion

(Hint hint, this is the attitude that prompts her to accept Tentoo and it's also a big part of her journey in the Rose Tyler dimension cannon audios.)

This is also the episode where her friendship with Mickey essentially ends for the time being. Seeing how much the Doctor and Rose have grown to love one another gives him the courage to leave. To find that part of the world that is his, even if it means putting a pause on his friendship with Rose. It hurts her to see him go, goes to show you how close they are, but Rose understands that this is something he has to do. That he, just like she did with the Doctor, has to put himself first.

This is why in their final moments together they don't kiss. It parallels her first departure, but without the affirmation that they're going to continue their romantic relationship.

In the kiss they do share earlier, it is one sided.  Initiated by Mickey and one that Rose doesn't seem responsive to, doesn't even close her eyes. It comes unnaturally to the two of them, as if to show how their relationship has changed.

Rose does not share the same outlook that the Doctor does. It's because of this, that their perspectives have a tendency to clash when they're in danger. 

She doesn’t let the moments they have together be weighed down by the knowledge that their time together is limited. No, it is that knowledge that helps her be more outright with her affections towards him. Carrying the strength and hope they both need to continue finding the joy in living in the present. 

We see this presented explicitly, when they realize they're stuck on Krop Tor.

"Can you build another Tardis?

"They were grown, not built. And with my whole planet gone, we're kind of stuck."

"Well it could be worse. This lot said they'd give us a lift."

"Then what?"

"I don't know. Find a planet. Get a job. You live a life same as the rest of the universe.

The Doctor can't handle the thought of Rose dying. You see this, in the manner that he is so quick to give up hope once he has accepted their potential doom. 

It goes to show that the strength and peppy attitude he has, is nothing more than a mask. That deep inside, he is afraid and struggling to hold it back.

This is where we seemingly see how he really is, how he really feels. 

How hesitant he is at accepting that there's a way out. 

How quickly he reverts back to cynicism when he isn't reminded that there's still something to fight for.

Rose understands this. 

It's because of this, that she resorts to humor. Telling him about the potential outcomes of their current situation, that won't end in death. That even as they wait for their inevitable end, they can still enjoy their final moments together.

It's in that moment, where they're both vulnerable that she admits she sees herself sharing a life with him. Something that seemingly stuns him back to the present, and causes him to put his walls up.

This must be terrifying to him. 

To have someone understand him so well, that he is caught off guard by how quickly she is able to bypass any prior barriers.

"I promised Jackie I would always take you back home"

"Everyone leaves home in the end"

"Not to end up stuck here."

"Yeah but stuck with you, that's not so bad."

"Yeah?"

"Yes"

It's her ability to not take his reluctance to voice his feelings personally, that causes him to smile. Because it's the moment he realizes that she sees him for who he is, and understands.

It's her capability to see what he means to say that prompts her to kiss his helmet right before he goes. It is what gives them the strength to watch one another as he drops below the surface with Ida.

In other words, it is what gives her the confidence to reaffirm what he means to her even if he can't express it back.

"Oh she knows"

That is why he doesn't see the need to voice how much he loves her right before he drops to the unknown. In a leap of faith, he realizes that really the only belief he really holds is in Rose Tyler. That he will have another opportunity to voice his feelings, away from imminent death.

Rose also devotes all her belief in him, and willingly shoots at the glass in an attempt to survive for his sake.

Beyond all reason, it's this complete devotion to one another that causes them to overcome the challenges that stand in their way. It is what motivates them to assume that the other is alive, even when the odds are against them.

It's this faith, that gives them the strength to continue living once they're separated…only to then reunite in season 4.

(Where another parallel can be found, in how they both seemingly always end up running towards one another. They both hold on to the one person they know will never fail them.)

"Love and Monsters" demonstrates the extent of Jackie's loneliness. She is a single mother who fills the void her husband left with casual relationships. Her daughter is the only real constant part of her life and the fact that she was "left behind" by her Pete is what causes her to harden and see the world very critically. 

It explains why she had such a hard time understanding Rose and her manner of thinking, because it goes against what she craves: security.

This is why she struggled to let her go, but now the Doctor is essentially her family too, and so her loyalty extends to him too. The Tylers are exceptionally loyal, they love unashamedly and they lend a hand to anyone who needs it: Mickey and the Doctor. They may clash often, but that loyalty is what allows them to hold on to one another in spite of their flaws as people. 

They're the ultimate ride or dies.

Jackie and Rose are very alike in this way, this is why they often fight. Their love for the people in their lives is so intense, that they have trouble separating that love from their decisions. It is what gives them the strength to stay by the side of their loved ones, even if it means sacrificing their own needs.

But something that I think people overblow is the reason why Jackie tells her that she's becoming someone unlike herself.

The reason why Rose's life was able to be relatively stable, unlike some companions who came after her, is because she makes an effort to maintain both her human life and her life in the stars. They're intricately intertwined, much like how Donna is also able to maintain her foundation in spite of the memory loss.

The Doctor really isn't her whole life if you think about it. She is not being forced to stay by his side and she does take the time to spend time with family outside of their adventure. 

She chooses to concentrate on their relationship but she has the choice to divide time for others as well.

There is another aspect of her, that I feel like too many people might misunderstand.

She doesn't think of herself as the Doctor's replacement. Her role by his side does not conflate her self importance, she is more than aware that ultimately she is not him. That she, is not granted the same liberties that he has to put her life on the line. 

She knows she is not the Doctor. And she, is comfortable with embracing her role as his companion. She wishes to share his responsibility, not take it over.

This is why she is able to maintain this human aspect of herself for so long. She's still compassionate and understanding, because the tough call is not on her hands most of the time. If it was, she would have gradually lost that part of herself in season 1. But nonetheless it becomes a possible outcome if she's not careful, just like her mother warned.

When she is clinging for her life in Doomsday, something I don't see enough people point out is how truly selfless Rose was at this moment to let go of her hold, for the good of humanity. She reaches for the lever, knowing that there is a good chance she will die, this is why she takes the time to look at him while she desperately holds on.

She wants the last person she sees to be the man she loves; to find the courage to do what is right at the cost of her own life. It was not done out of recklessness.

This is why they are perfect for one another. Because they both understand that they are not the center of the universe, that ultimately, the duty they now share comes first.

This is explored further in the Dimension Cannon audios, that gives context to the development she goes through that leads to her reappearance in season 4.

Her reasons for using the dimension cannon are more complex than they appear at first glance. Her sole reason for finding him is not only because of the love she feels for him, but because she also has to put a stop to the mass destruction of every universe. 

I see way too many people use her reasoning for coming back as evidence that she has this weird obsession with the Doctor, and that's just not true. 

She seeks him out because she has to. 

If she gets to stay with him afterwards, that's just a plus.

(from here on out, I will give out some direct spoilers on said audios to provide more context to the development we see in show. Skip to after the 2nd row of asterisks if you don’t wish to be spoiled)

*******************************************************************************************

It is in the realm of the audios, that Rose is entrusted to travel to parallel worlds without the prior knowledge of knowing where she will end up. Every universe is doomed, and she has to find allies in the parallel versions of the people she loves to pick up on details required to find her original world.

There is no such thing as a parallel Doctor. So she must figure out a way to get back to him and warn him, without his help.

Now I must stress, these audios get dark really fast. 

They do not hold back on showing just how awful this duty is, and how it comes at the expense of her humanity and moral code.

At times, she has to manipulate these parallel versions of her friends and family into helping her. To use them, up until she is forced to leave and in doing so, condemning them to a long and painful death.

 Over and over again. 

Imagine what that does to a person? 

To see the people you love, realize that you can't save them. To leave them behind, while hearing them plead for their lives to be saved.

She takes this duty on, under the pretense that her familiarity with the Doctor makes her the most ideal candidate for the job. She embarks on her first trip, thinking that this might be the closest thing she has to being on another adventure and that in the process, she could save some worlds in his absence.

But it's in fulfilling the role as the universe's protector that she realizes just what she signed up for. She becomes the Doctor's replacement, in the same way Jack Harkness takes on Torchwood and partakes in the duty to protect the earth. 

Yet what makes her different from those two, is that she is mortal. She doesn't have the tools they have at her disposal nor the wisdom that they have gained over the span of their extended lives.

No, she can die.

She cannot save anyone.

And there truly is nothing to guarantee that she will succeed. 

We see her struggle to maintain her distance, to not promise a way out to the people she encounters because there is none. She is no hero, she is their angel of death.

In an act of defiance to the death that will follow her, on her first trip, she saves an alternate version of Clive and takes him under her wing. Only to come to the realization that one life is not enough to make up for all the millions that died under her watch.

It is because of this that she opts to not embark on said missions alone anymore. Instead, she takes her own Pete, Jackie, and Clive only to find that they too struggle to maintain their distance. If not for them, then who will ground her?

It's in one of these solo missions, that she crumbles under the weight of the responsibility that she adopted. 

In a twist of fate, she is imprisoned inside a red phone box. Trapped inside with no means of escaping, and no real guarantee that she will find a means of leaving before the world goes to shit.

It is in this moment, where she is left to wallow in her situation, that we see her break down. She admits this to her mother, who can hear her through the intercom.

"I can't"

"Rose you're scaring me, just get out. Find a way"

"I'm locked inside a police box."

"What? A Tardis?"

"No Mum, a real one. A red one, all musty on the inside."

"Well you gotta get out."

“I know.”

I'll skip ahead, but I felt this was necessary to include to show how dire the situation is.

"I'm sorry.”

“Rose?”

 “It’s the same mom. Same doors, same noise, same light through the windows-I think they’re a bit smaller. If I half close my eyes, i’m there..but it’s not, i’m not. I’m not him. I’m not a time lord. No psychic paper. No sonic, No centuries of knowledge. Only one heart..”

“Sweetheart, I know it hurts but you gotta get it together.”

“How?”

“I don’t know, pick a lock or something?”

“How did he do it?”

“Sheer cheek, most of the time”

“He lit up every room he was in, they always listen to him! He walked through hell like it was a walk in the park.”

Because now she realizes how important it was for him to remain strong, to smile in the face of danger. Before it was easy to assume that she understood everything there was about how he looked at the world. The size of the burden, and what it meant to share it.

But now she’s in his shoes and the truth is starting to settle in. Jackie says this in response, as a means of putting things into perspective for Rose.

“If the universe needs the Doctor, then the universe needs Rose Tyler to find the Doctor. I’m so proud of you but you need to stay alive. One heart. One life, you got that?”

Rose never sought to replace him, we see that here in the manner that she can't handle being in his shoes. She is starting to develop that very same cynicism that he once had and is beginning to feel a sense of inferiority.

This is why she needs someone with her, much like how the Doctor needs a companion. This is a duty that he has to share with someone, not alone.

Jackie believes in her strength, because she knows that she has it in her to prevail. Rose and the Doctor are not the same, but nonetheless she is now the closest thing he has to an equal. And she has to learn to handle this new responsibility through her own means, not by what the Doctor believes is right.

(This is as far as I will share because there's still one audio left in the series and it has yet to come out, so I will hold on to my final conclusions until then. In the meantime though, I urge you all to check them out. They are absolutely worth it!)

*******************************************************************************************

But with this in mind, the hardened version of Rose we see in season 4 makes more sense. It's why the thought of having an alternate Donna die doesn't really dissuade her into using her, and why she is so unlike the Rose Tyler we knew. 

She has matured.

This is reflected in her clothing: the overly practical nature of her outfit and her leather jacket. It purposefully parallels the outfit her first Doctor wore at his lowest point. The version of himself that was overwhelmed by the responsibility he held to uphold what his people once did.

I believe it's this new understanding of his perspective that stops her from putting a name to the nature of their relationship to Donna. She assumes they're together, but Rose neither agrees nor denies her assumption. 

Because she can't make that decision on his behalf, not when he has so much at stake.

It is this new attitude that also seemingly makes her more distant. Less forgiving towards the Dalek threat and less inclined for a peaceful confrontation because she understands that sacrifices must be made for the greater good. It's why she serves as his support system throughout all the chaos, she knows now how overwhelming it is.

Yet that part of her that seeks to comfort those she loves is still there. We see this in the way that when the Doctor is struck, she does not waste time wallowing in all that she has done to get to him. No, she puts aside her feelings and tells him how much she missed him. Tells him she's been busy, as a means of not burdening him with all that she has done to get to him.

(Just as an additional tidbit, I don't know why people use these small bouts of jealousy she briefly displays in the first half of this two parter to justify why they believe Rose wouldn't get along with other companions. She canonically does lol She even compliments Martha and is seen to be on good terms with both Donna and Sarah Jane? Her initial jealousy stemmed from disappointment in being left out. It's not enough to warrant the impression that she is a jealous person all the time.)

With all this in mind, it also offers an additional reason as to why she ultimately ends up choosing Tentoo.

Her final decision is not done on a whim, no, it's her being exposed to the constant dread of a life in his shoes, that puts things into perspective.

She cannot continue chasing after him.

When she is returned to that beach, she comes to the realization that the Doctor is going to decide what is best for her, again. 

In the time they have spent apart, he hasn't changed his outlook on his prior decision. He is still firm in his belief that she is better off living without him (the timelord version), so much so that he does not ask for her input.

It's because of this that she decides to not back down. To not let him think that he can get away with deciding on her behalf because she's not the same woman she was all those years ago. 

Given that it's her life, it is she who needs to make the final call.

Notice that what she asks, when deciding what path to choose, is for clarification on what he meant to say on their initial separation.

The reason why this is important is because the man she knew, would never say it out loud. Only the one capable of changing and giving into that love, would ever do such a thing.

And that version of him is Tentoo.

He is human, but most importantly, his duty to the universe is the same as her own. Indirect. The original Time lord self can continue handling things in his absence so he's got nothing stopping him from enjoying a life by her side. One that can either be mundane or filled with adventure, but it will be spent with one another.

The choice was obvious.

(Notice that this is not the first time she is asked to make this choice. The first time being with Mickey, where she seemingly chooses the life of thrills over her relationship with him, over love. Now that she knows what both paths entail, this time she prioritizes love and chooses Tentoo. 

With the growth she underwent throughout her seasons, she realizes that it's not the adventure she wants, it's the Doctor. This is her, finally making the decision that fits this version of herself that understands that love is what she needs)

But it's with this in mind that she questions what the fate of the time lord Doctor would be if she stays. That is why she says "it's still not right, the Doctor is still you."

Because she personally knows what his role entails. She was barely able to handle it on her own with the help of her family, who is to say that he won't crash and burn when he is alone?

The Doctor is not only his name, but his promise to strive for the greater good. In other words, the role he plays for the universe. She doesn't mean that they're not the same man. No, she means to point out that the price of her happiness will come at his expense. 

That the time lord version, no matter what she chooses, will forever be tied to the responsibility of handling the universe.

"And I am him"

With this, Ten assures her that he too, in a way, will get his happy ending. Because by choosing Tentoo, he guarantees that this version of himself, his tenth incarnation, will not suffer the same fate that he will. A new man will not walk away in his shoes, no, this version of himself will spend the rest of his life loving the woman that he was made to love. To have the one adventure he can never have.

It does not come without pain of course. That is why he can’t bare to see the two together, and turns his back on them. Realizing then and there, that there is no longer a place in the life she will live from here on out.

When she kisses Tentoo, it is both a way of imparting that final sense of gratitude to the time lord version of himself (who allowed for this to happen), and it is also to signify the beginning of a new life she will spend with Tentoo. 

Tentoo is the Doctor, he harbors those same desires that the time lord version of himself has. He is human, which grants him the freedom to choose what path he wants and that path is none other than hers.

It would make absolutely no sense to have her resent him or even believe he isn't the Doctor. 

This is the girl who was able to love multiple versions of her father and mother. That through her solo adventures was reminded that at the core of individuals, are traits that remain regardless of their circumstances.

Why would she not love him too?

A detail I love is that when she hears the Tardis dematerialize, her first instinct is to stop and see it go. 

She is not running to stop him, that much is obvious, because she stops long before she even reaches it.

No, she just stands there and looks at it. 

Just like she would have done had she had the chance to see the earth go on her first trip. This is her goodbye, her affirming that he will be remembered and his importance in her life.

That is why Tentoo joins her, silently taking her hand as if to assure her that he is still there.That he understands that this, is her way of saying goodbye to his other self. But don’t fret, it won’t be long before they too will have their own adventures amongst the stars.

That being said, God forbid he finds out that Jackie joined her on her dimension cannon adventures, he would freak lmao

#10th doctor #doctor x rose #rtd era #tenrose #character analysis #ninth doctor #doctor who #rambles #tentoo x rose #doctorrose #ninerose #rose tyler #rose tyler and the dimension cannon #rose tyler analysis #timepetals #retrospective #long reads

[artist-issues]

I know you have kind of commented on this topic in one of your posts, but what do you think of the fact that Tolkien hated Disney and thought of Walt as a "con-artist" (if I remember correctly) because of how much would be changed? Even though I very much love Disney movies, considering how Tolkien studied mythology, folklore and history from other cultures in-depth, particularly those of European background, I do understand why he was not fond Walt's work at all if we view it from his perspective. Other people seem to share a similar sentiment. I ask you because you often analyze Disney movies and their themes quite in-depth. This whole thing is interesting.

Well, I'll preface by saying I'm not much of a Tolkien apologist. I don't connect with him or his mentality as well as I might flatter myself by saying I do C.S. Lewis' mentality. C. S. Lewis had this beautiful way of blending genuine good-faith enjoyment of something and careful, intentional critical thinking. He could be a reasonable analyzer of media, and a childlike consumer of media, at the same time. Don't know if I've mastered that myself, or if I ever will, but I really admire it.

Which is besides the point, sorry! 😂

But Tolkien was different. First off, Tolkien said some things about interpreting the meaning of his own stories that I don't agree with. He keeps insisting he wasn't trying to "say" anything with Lord of the Rings, or infuse it with any particular "meaning." Truth of the matter is, though, that is not true of any good storyteller. What they believe about the world bleeds into what they create, if they're creating genuinely. So Lord of the Rings is about how small decisions matter, doing what you can with what you're given instead of trying to control everything matters—whether Tolkien likes it or not, whether he was always conscious of it or not, that's what his story says.

He also criticized weird things to criticize about Lewis' works. For someone who was Lewis' friend, I don't know how he could've looked at what Lewis was writing and been surprised, or disgruntled, at the hodgepodge of mythology in works like Narnia. I don't know what made him think a "children's story" would feel like anything other than...made for children.

But anyway. All that to say, I don't always agree with Tolkien, or feel like I understand him. His response to Disney movies is just one of those things I don't get. I can speculate, but I don't know.

Like I said, I think he was so used to thinking of fairy tales and literature in a way that is much...higher, and more layered, than how the everyday layman thought of them, that when a Kansas cartoonist started retelling fairytales without any apparent grasp of that layering, it really rubbed him the wrong way.

I guess it would be like if someone came along twenty years from now, pointed at Disney's The Little Mermaid, and said, "look! A cartoon about fish! I'm going to make an TikTok dance about fish and call it 'The Little Mermaid,' and retell it that way!"

First of all we'd be like "IT'S ABOUT SO MUCH MORE THAN FISH, it's not just an CARTOON, are you BLIND?!" And then secondly we'd probably go, "and what? A TikTok dance?! Are you kidding me? You want to take this beautiful pillar of traditional animation and living color and musical mastery and drag it down to the level of middle school girls flapping their hands around cringily??"

That's probably how Tolkien felt Disney was treating Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Because back then, the medium (TikTok dances, animation) was just associated with sort of lowbrow humor and silliness. Walt was still inventing the whole "animated film to be taken seriously" thing. And back then, Tolkien would've seen the comedy characters of the Dwarfs and their character development as very shallow in comparison to the mythos of Dwarfs in literary and oral-tradition history. He had the most background knowledge. So what he was comparing Walt's movies to was, for him, like comparing grape Gatorade to aged Italian Wine.

As far as Disney being a "con artist..." yeah, I think that's a little bit of a stretch. He was definitely selling something, but if you can look at Walt Disney's life and see dollar bill signs, instead of a guy who genuinely made what he liked because he liked it, you don't know much about Walt Disney. He didn't adapt fairy tales because he thought they could make him money. He adapted fairy tales because he adored them, just like he had a train in his backyard because he adored them. Ask his brother Roy how much Walter "Let's Invent Smell-O-Vision and Drop Flowers on the Audience of Fantasia" Disney was thinking about exploiting the public for financial gain.

Like I said, Tolkien was responding to Walt Disney because he was Tolkien, and it would've been like asking a Bird to relate to a Krill. They were way too different to ever understand each other on the level that either of them preferred being understood at.

#Tolkien #Disney #Walt Disney #j. r. r. tolkien #c. S. Lewis #Barbie #Narnia #lord of the rings #lotr #Snow White and the seven dwarfs

[ask-the-rag-dolly]

First of all sooo excited for your blog! The one thing I don't like about digital circus is the complete and utter lack of Ragtha love! Lol

I know you said you prefer platonic relationships, and for my girl Ragatha, I think if her and Jax were secretly besties, it would add so much more to each other. Cause it means Jax does have a vulnerable side, and Ragtha has an unlikely ally perhasp willing to push things a little far for her.

Also just a personal headcannon since Ragthas been there the longest maybe she's actively helped some of the main cast figure out to cope and hold on to their sanity, because she did say their was still time to "fix" Kafmo. So that's implies someone can be brought back if their not completely constructed yet. I think there's so much potential in her doing that for Jax because their different morals and personality seems like the most interesting dynamic to me. Plus, gotta love that angst.

// yeah same ! ragatha quickly became my favorite - for several reasons that will be too long for this post - and it really saddens me that she's already getting pushed aside ...

like don't get me wrong , she gets more attention than gangle and zooble ( who are also characters i'm fond of that i wish gets the same level of analysis as jax and kinger ) , but there's so much to pick apart and analyze with ragatha that someone has to take the mantle ^^

besides uurgh i may love jesterdoll but ragatha has so much potential for interesting dynamics , not just pomni ! like her being very compliant towards caine , how she might've helped zooble considering they were the newest before pomni , the history she might've had with kinger , how she's the most suitable to comfort gangle , and just !! her entire thing with jax !!

like i can see why they can be an interesting dynamic - they're like two sides of the same coin in a way ( both are secretly terrified out of their minds and hides it by either servicing people or pushing them away . do you see my vision ) . i personally see them as begrudging siblings - really dislike each other but most likely won't be able to live without the other

( also a part of that may not be fueled by how ragatha's heavily inspired by raggedy ann and that jax's voice is a raggedy andy impersonation ... )

i will admit it's a bit too early to draw a conclusion on what's going on between them though since gooseworx keeps reiterating that no one likes jax and that he's an irredeemable asshole - but i know their dynamic won't just be pure , mutual hate . i personally love the thought of them being the only one who truly understands the other despite the vitriol lol

also ! i've always thought of ragatha as the group meditator in a way ! in my head , she's the glue that helps hold the group together - i don't think the current cast will survive even a single hour without the only person who isn't panicky and/or irresponsible . i won't be surprised if she actually saved someone from near-abstraction !

though i don't think it's a role that's doing her any big favors . do you think anyone ever asks how she's doing ? (: //

#[ ooc ] #[ ESSAY WARNING ]

[itsabouttimex2]

Amazing job at writing the new part as always! It flows nicely and you can easily tell how familiar Macaque & MC without making him OOC. Honestly i admire your grasp at these characters and ability of doing something as complex as interactive series. I'm kinda curious how do you plan things and how far ahead but only if you want to share it ofc.

Going back to the actually piece- it actually made me look up the meanings of flowers despite the original thought of it only being because of the color association. Two first flowers have pretty easy and basic meaning. I can see why the edgy (/affectionate) mentor wouldn't want them near his home.

Freesia - friendship trust innocence

yellow roses - friendship, joy and similar stuff

The one choosen by Macaque are a little more interesting.

Tansies - immortality, resistance, "I declare against you", sometimes used in medicine

black dahlias - (warning of) betrayal, sadness, (not specified black ones: dignity, good luck, elegance)

I'm guessing the tansies are about him being bitter about the Wukong and their more practical use. Black dahlias could be about Monkey King but also some kind of foreshadowing depending on our choice. Or I'm reading into it too much.

Hopefully I'm not overthinking it or completely missing the point (and if i am, I'm really,really sorry). Just wanted to share it in case other readers didn't look it up + i know some people like to see their work analysed but if i'm going to far please let me know! Have a good day/night! :]

(Sorry for any mistakes and feel free to delete the ask)

Oh my god, thank you so much! That’s such a sweet thing to say! (Please never stop analyzing my work I put a lot of effort into it💜💜)

🌻🌻I’ll start with flowers: you are right on the money here. Freesia especially are bright and colorful blooms, coming in many different gorgeous colors. Yellow roses are just the same, bright and cheery and so similar to the sun.

And, given that freesia come in orange and yellow… it’s possible the potted plants were a living reminder of Sun Wukong that Macaque finally got sick of and ripped apart. Or he just took advantage of someone else shredding the innocent flowers and took something that Y/N worked hard on and changed it to his liking instead. (Written to be ambiguous as to which scenario occurred.)

Notably, the new flowers not only match his own personal feelings, but even his color scheme! Yellow, then red and black. Twice over do these flowers symbolize him, something he took and changed to make more suitable to his tastes and feelings.

But he’s not the one who takes care of them- no, it’s Y/N who is dedicated to seeing them grow.

His student tending and nurturing the flowers that represent Macaque, while Macaque destroys/allows the destruction of the flowers that represent his student. Huh. Funny.

Okay flower rant done.🌻🌻

Macaque is such an interesting character to write, given that there’s a spike of cruelty barbing out from almost every action he takes. I think a lot of people have forgotten that the man hasn’t had a redemption arc in canon- he displays zero regret for, say… manipulating and trying to kill MK. Or leveling the Dragon Palace of the East Sea. Or assaulting Tang, a strict non-combatant. Or holding Mei’s life hostage.

He doesn’t feel bad for doing any of these. If he does, he’s keeping tight-lipped about it. No apologies. No direct atonement.

And even on the extremely rare circumstance that he’s being “kind”, like deciding to stop torturing MK in Shadowplay, it comes across as almost “I’m bored with you, you aren’t fun anymore.”

He’s not a good guy. So even with Y/N, who he genuinely does care for, there’s this level of manipulation.

Like, he calls Y/N adorable, which sounds nice… but there’s almost a level of victim-blaming to it. No matter how roundabout his words, Macaque basically says to his own student: “If you looked different, people wouldn’t bother you, so let me change the way you look.”

And they trust him enough to agree.

Or letting them cook in fear outside his door when he’s clearly near enough to open it, but dropping the act when they start to break down.

He’s such an interesting character to write ugh I love it.

I had a lot of the routes planned pretty far out, actually, and I’ll give a few examples of what was planned:

Spider Demon Y/N was sort of naive and excitable, but was going to mature/sour after realizing that their beloved queen was, in fact, the bad guy. They were going to have to come to terms with her necessary defeat and their own part in betraying her, as well as living on after you’ve cut ties to your family. Then, readers were going to be able to pick one other henchman to convince to join the heroes.

Dragon Y/N was going to have to both gain Ao Guang’s (their father) approval to live on the surface, and decide how they felt about MK possessing the Ruyi Jingu Bang. They fought using two strings of beaded pearls, utilizing them as whips and grappling hooks to maneuver around the battle field. Also, they hated Macaque. Genuinely throwing hands on sight if they saw that edgy rat.

Heir/Proxy Y/N was going to be a pretty miserable and clingy person, having spent most of their life alone on account of both the LBD and Mayor’s influence. Overcoming their fears and anxieties of being unlovable was going to be a massive part of the journey, learning to love themself and be loved in turn. They were going to have to learn to master the powers forcibly implanted into their body, trying to prevent themself from being sacrificed for power to aid LBD’s onwards path to ‘destiny’.

Ne Zha’s Y/N was going to be cute and polite, very excited to explore the mortal realm outside the grasp of their overprotective mentor/brother. They were also going to have to deal with the first two lotus princes (also overprotective) and Ao Bing, who served as a dear friend.

Sun Wukong’s Y/N was going to be his estranged child who was bitter over ML inheriting the staff instead of them. They were going to despise him for never training them, having to find masters and teachers elsewhere all across the world. In turn, he was desperately trying to make amends and reestablish a strong bond with his cherished progeny, hoping to reconnect eventually.

Also Mei was going to call Y/N “Broth-Face”.

#Time Talks #Choose Your Own Adventure #A Brand New Journey

[dazaispinkietoe]

Levi Analysis !!

OKAY LEVIS BIRTHDAY ANALYZING HIM WITH DR PEPPER IN MY DR PEPPER SHIRT LETS GO YIPEE

Brief description of his character, Leviathan is the 3rd eldest/most powerful brother of the seven. He’s the sin of envy, for some reason a Navy general, but mostly known for his introverted personality and social anxiety. 

In Celestia, Leviathan carried out a similar role. But unlike the other brothers, he wasn’t much happier than he was in Devildom. In Nightbringer, Leviathan says that he felt like he didn’t belong anywhere. He felt like he had no purpose, which is likely why he took on these big roles, feeling like without them he’s just a waste of space. Touching on this, that’s one of the reasons for his sin. I’ve talked about this before, but because of the displacement Leviathan felt, his reaction was one of envy, looking down on himself for what others had that he didn’t, and once he did have it, moved on to something else. He can’t be satisfied because of this, which is why he constantly plays games that he can consistently level up in or at least use to distract himself. That could also be one of the reasons he has so many outbursts. If you’re constantly distracting yourself, when you’re not able to, you don’t handle it as well. Instead of being like Belphegor, though, all of the external and internal self hatred causes Leviathan to lash out in a different way. Instead of having an annoyed reaction, he has more of a “How dare you?” reaction. I can assume this is because he feels like everyone has so much more than him, which leads to him thinking that because everyone must have so much more than him, they must be trying to brag. 

This is also why he is so protective and obsessive about his interests. When he finds something, he wants to make sure he stays at the top of it, so he can at least be good at something. When that’s challenged, he starts feeling worse than normal, and that form of escapism isn’t really escapism but more like a chore or something he has to do to just stay at the top of. I could imagine that he also feels like a failure and blames himself for Lilith’s death. His job in Celestia had to do with keeping people safe after all, and he couldn’t even do that for the person closest to him. Not only that, but after everything he was still thrown out. Now he had to start over again, with people actually judging him. After he fell from Celesita, Leviathan felt isolated. He didn’t have a title here, or anything to do but sit back and play his games. Until he met Henry, he felt totally alone, his brothers didn’t really want to interact very much, and if they did there were pretty much always arguments or fights. Once he met Henry, he felt like he could understand someone for once, even if that someone was just a snake. Snakes are known for being feared, or seen as vermin that need to be removed. He could probably empathize with the snake, especially after Henry had pretty much wandered into their house, where he wasn’t really welcome. Leviathan had similar features as Henry, too, with his tail being similar to serpents or sea snakes.  

But eventually, he had to let that snake go. Not because it was unhappy, it was really the opposite. Him and the snake got along too well, but Leviathan was too insecure to see that. He thought he was holding the snake back, so he opened the tank to let him go, and Henry left because he thought Leviathan needed more friends. This reminds me of Leviathan’s relationship with MC in a way. In a lot of the chats Leviathan is in, he’s insulting himself, talking about how MC is the only person to understand him, or apologizing in the form of self deprecation. He probably feels like MC deserves better than him and is trying to give MC excuses for why they should leave him. 

Leviathan is also extremely empathetic. I feel like a lot of people ignore this side of him, but he has a tendency to give inanimate objects personalities or feelings, like how he was afraid to go into a store alone because he felt like the clothes were judging him. One of the articles I read on this said this could be because of over inclusivity, which would make sense because if you feel left out you’re more likely to try harder to not let anything else feel the same. 

I HAVE MORE TO SAY BUT IM RLLY ON A TIME CRUNCH RN AND HAVENT HAD MUCH MOTIVATION IM SORRY </3

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LEVIATHAN I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH

#obey me swd #obey me shall we date #obey me #obey me leviathan #obey me levi

[darkestprompts]

I really like the Duelist,, I don't have the game but I've seen a lot of people having fun playing her and I like her.

But for me, her character backstory is so booooriiing

She just did stuff because yes.

I like trying to analyze the characters reason to do something. The believes and values they have and how it weights on them.

-Why did this character did that? How? What made them choose this? How does it affect them and the people around them? -

And stuff like that I guess,,

But she has none of it. Nothing at all.

I was wondering your opinion on her backstory and if you had any headcanons or something that could give her some reason¿?

(Idk if I made myself understandable, I'm pretty confident on my english but I still have moments of doubt¿)

Saludos desde Chile/Greetings from Chile

🇨🇱

Saludos a todos mis hermanos de Latinoamérica!

Sahar, Sahar, Sahar... I'm still mulling over what I'd rather they had done with this character, so forgive me if this is rambly.

I'm disappointed that the Warlord is Reynauld's nemesis and not hers. It could have gone the way of her as a failed hero who tried to stop the invaders, emphasizing her lack of experience outside sports in spite of her technical excellence with the Warlord's raw brutality. That would be a very different character, more foolish and naive than morally questionable.

Now, I'm the first one to say that I'm all for women's wrongs. I love villainous women, morally gray women, unpleasant women. But to be blunt, Sahar feels like the MCU's idea of a badass female character circa 2012. She's PRETTY and PERFECT and KILLS MEN and DOESN'T CARE. Ok, but why is she like that? Does it make sense? Is her journey interesting? Is she allowed to have feelings like a normal person? Is she allowed to be complex and contradictory?

I like that Paracelsus missed the fundamentals of ethics in her pursuit of the refinement of medical science. I like that Audrey will soil her hands for her own survival and comfort. I like that Josephine will betray anyone who stands between her and her goals. I can understand their reasons even when they are morally wrong.

I can't understand why a top-level athlete suddenly lost her shit and decided to kill the person she loved, then run off to try to stab Cthulhu&Friends. It's not even that she is a robot, because a robot would presume some kind of logic.

The other character that suffers from a similar lack of structure in the way he is written is Damian. He used to be a man with extreme beliefs that made him dangerous and intolerant. But now you can't even figure out what he believes or stands for, they turned him into some CrAzEe guy, because masochism funee. It's lazy writing and it's not interesting.

If I were to stick close to what they gave us, I would try to ground the narrative. Alright, she got lost in a rush of bloodlust while fighting her man. Why is HE happy that she killed him? That's stupid. Make it so she loved that thrill, the moment of unbridled violence, but has to contend with the horror and fear in her lover's eyes as she killed him. Make her anxious to find that feeling again, but afraid that she has lost her mind. Let guilt and temptation tear her in the middle.

Or if you want her to simply be an unrepentant jackass, have her challenge a rival to a duel with the full intent of killing them, then be forced to run away when her scheme is revealed. She only regrets that she was discovered and that's fine.

#darkest dungeon #asks #anon #dd duelist #dd sahar #thoughts

[spinbitchzu]

this blog is for realsies dead but I do open this website everyday regardless and I feel the need to chime in about the way this fandom thinks about wu as a character and as a person. 

It has been my personal observation that wu tends to be extremely polarizing — people (in my experience, the majority), seem to really fucking hate him or really love him. but this is a kids show and I think theres a bit of a flawed reading of him due to his role as an older/mentor character.

because wu is oldddd, he’s old as hell and he lived through a war and he had his brother turn on him and lost almost all his friends and his son and had to bear the weight of his father’s legacy all by himself for many many many years and I guess I'm not trying to say theres a *right* way to regard him, but isn’t it soooo much more interesting not to paint him as wholly good or wholly bad? isn’t it so much more fun to see his life in a bigger picture and see where he did his best and where he was misguided or selfish or cripplingly, helplessly human, even as the son of god? 

there is such an ability in this fandom to extend that kind of empathy to garmadon but wu (and to a different extent, misako) are just terribly vilified for their mistakes by the fandom at large and it has just never made sense to me. they aren’t evil or good, they’re just people. they’re more than mentors and parents, they’re also their own people who’ve gone through their own struggles and that informs the way they behave. they can have done wrong or hurtful things and that doesn't have to mean that they dont try their best to be good. the good things they've done dont make them wholly good either and there is no level of moral “cancelling out” 

(im also not a big fan of the woobification/twinkification of wu based on his younger design but shksjdfkjs thats kind of a different issue and I dont wanna derail.)

I guess I just think as a fandom there should be more nuance applied to analyzing and portraying the characters who aren’t young and relatable and shippable like the ninja or angsty antiheroes like harumi/morro/garmadon

#ninjago #lego ninjago #sensei wu #misako #garmadon #who missed tavia giving overly serious kids show analysis hot takes #but I stay silly :3