#but my parents were like yeah fuck your formal dining room we need a fucking library

[rahleeyah]

Not me daydreaming about the townhouse I wanna buy and how I want to turn the spare bedroom into a library with floor to ceiling shelves and a cute little daybed and cubbies on the bottom shelf for Sammy to lie in 😭

#i grew up in a house where my sister and u shared a bedroom but the dining room had been converted to a library #a library that also served as a baby nursery and a bedroom for my dad later on #like that library wore a lot of hats #but my parents were like yeah fuck your formal dining room we need a fucking library #and i want one now so badly #there's shelves all over my apartment and it makes it feel crowded and my books are scattered everywhere #i mean don't get me wrong i know where every single one of them is but still #siiiiigh i am terrified of this process but I want it so badly

[closhelby]

HER. - Thomas Shelby

Smut

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader

Warning: it’s peaky blinders, with smut

Word Count: 2472

AN: this is my first time writing smut, please give me any tips pls, it’s appreciate. It’s probably shite.

::::::

She always was on his mind. The woman, that always read between the lines, always two steps ahead of him, and had an incredible eye for business. She had left him years prior, leaving for a top business school in London. they never had a title, a label on their relationship, but it wasn’t exactly a secret that they always, somehow, gravitated back to one another. Often people, especially Polly, would say that there was no way two people would be so alike, strong headed but only rarely clashed. 

However y/n’s degree had finished and she was coming back to Small Heath for a period of time before she was going to figure out what exactly what she wanted to do. Y/n was actually great friends with the Shelby family, since growing up with them, living just down the road, they practically lived together. Y/n was actually younger than Tommy, she was ages with Ada and John. They were in the same class throughout school, Ada and y/n regularly wrote to each other, updating each other on Ada’s eventful life as a Shelby still in Small Heath and y/n’s very exciting studying life in London. 

They had actually planned to meet up, for a nice and quiet drink at the Garrison on her return. The thoughts swirled in y/n’s mind as she approached the Garrison, it had just gone 6pm, and she knew as it was a Friday, she did have a possibly of bumping into her first, arguably her only love.  Pushing the thoughts to the back of her head, she pushed open the door to see a fairly crowded Garrison. 

“Ah, y/n, how was London?” Harry shouted, from behind the bar. Y/n smiled at him, walking over to Ada sitting in the back corner. “It was good Harry, nice to be back in this clear Birmingham air”. He chuckled slightly, “Whiskey coming up love”. 

Y/n nodded, taking a seat next to Ada, giving her a cuddle, “Unsure if ive missed this place or not” y/n laughed slightly, eyes scanning the pub, looking for the one man she questioned if she did want to bump into. The pair was throwing back drinks like it was going out of fashion, knowing they would both regret this in the morning. Apparently, Ada wasn't allowing y/n to go back home, and in fact y/n didn't have a home yet and wasn't willing to go back to her parents, so Ada was insisting that she stayed at hers until y/n found a suitable place. Y/n didnt put up a fight, despite them both being hot heads, and taking absolutely no shit from anyone, men or woman, y/n didn't argue. She was actually really thankful for her. 

They eventually stumbled into the house in the early hours of the morning, their laughs echoing throughout the silent house. 

::::

The sun caught y/n directly in the eyes, quickly awoke y/n from her sleep. Her head felt as though someone had been hitting her head against the floor multiple times. Y/n continued to lay there, turning away from the sun, trying to keep the contents of her stomach from getting sprayed all over her and the sleeping Ada. She made an attempt at moving, sat with her head in her hands as she was trying to give herself words of encouragement to get up and make herself something to eat. 

“Fuck sake, why do we do this to ourselves?” Ada moaned from behind her. Y/n scoffed, “ Your bloody idea”.

Quickly standing up, in hope she could get it over with quickly. The room continuing to spin, as she attempted to walk to the door. Ada following closely behind. 

They both sat slumped over the dining room table, as they attempted to sober up and embrace the oncoming hangover. John now present, laughing at the two dying woman in front of him. 

“Good night?”

“Always.” Ada grumbled.

Pol placed a plate in front of them, toast with jam, “Does Tommy know your back? 

Eyes falling onto y/n from every person in their, “No.” answering quietly. 

Attempting to change the subject, “Told myself I would start looking for a new job today, since I shall be staying here for a decent period of time.”

John raised his eyebrow, “Tommy’s looking for a new secretary.” A slight smile on his face, “You've got a good background, business and that”.

“hm, I don't think so Johny boy”.    

“Don’t say no too soon, your a good asset to the business.” Pol added. No one was ever in y/n’s corner more than Pol, they would bang heads sometimes, as neither of them would back down. But she accepted y/n was the only one that had the best interest for Tommy.

The front door closed, and there he stood, the room turning to face Tommy, silence filling the room, then he broke it, “Heard you were back.”

“Yeah,” she replied quietly.

“Well, you know where I am if you need that job, I’m sure you’ve already been told,” he spoke, cigarette hanging from his mouth, as he walked away from them and into his office.

Y/n let out a breath, as though she hadn’t been breathing the whole time he was there. Ada smiled at her, placing her hand onto y/n’s, “I’m just going to get ready for the day love,” and off she went upstairs. The boys getting on with their day, and Pol following suit.

Y/n sat collecting her thoughts while trying to tell herself to face her ex lover, who she was still so deeply in love with. She tapped on the door slightly, opening it before opening it, “hi”, seeing his eyes flutter onto her shot tingles throughout her body, his eyes quickly looking away

“You can start tomorrow if you wish, I need a few papers signed and sent tomorrow. I can get your contract drawn up tonight.” He spoke, his eyes still not lifting from the paper in front of him.

“Yes, that’s fine 8am?”

“8.45, shop doesn’t open until 9. And there are others to set it up, that’s not your job.”

Nodding, “I heard you have a new woman.”

At this point he did look up at her, “I heard you had plenty men in London,”

She laughed slightly, nodding before heading to the door, “none were ever a patch on you,” closing the door, leaving a smirk on Thomas Shelbys face.

The following day came around, as y/n got ready for the day. Putting on a formal black tightly fitted dress, flats and pin curled hair. A slight tint of red lippy, remembering it used to be Tom’s favourite. Assuming Tommy wouldn’t be at the shop at this time, she took a whiskey with her placing it on the desk infront of Tommy’s office. The place was silent, despite there being other employees now starting to arrive, something calming about the place, almost the calm before the storm, she thought.

The hour was now around ten thirty, and there was still no sign of Tommy. She had already finished the papers he had left for her on her desk. It wasn’t the usual small Heath lady, she was educated, and to a very high level. y/n was sat twiddling her thumbs, awaiting Tommy’s arrival to get other things done.

“Y/n. My office please,” his voice low, as he stood behind her. She stood up quickly, following him into the private room.

“There’s your contract, if you wish to have a read over it. I see you’ve finished the work I gave given you for the day.”

Y/n took the contract into her hands, scanning for any mistakes or anything to question. But he actually was paying her nearly double the rate of other staff, and just over that the London rate was, “you’ve done your research eh. More than London rates, impressive. The peaky’s are stepping up in the world” Y/n smiled at him, as she placed the documents on the desk, picking up his pen, and signing it. Y/n Y/l/n. Followed with today’s date. That was now it, she was a Shelby Co Ltd employee.

...

The days turned into weeks, spending time with tommy while no one else was looking was becoming a regular thing. She now had her own place, just doors down from the shop. He would regularly call her into the office, and discuss things that he would usually never utter a word about. It had always been that way with them, since they were little, he would confine in her, telling her all the issue and problems he was facing, both in his mind and with others. But it was also coming to her attention that he was still seeing Grace.

Later on in the day, the clock chimes 11pm, as y/n sat listening to the music that takes her back to a child, while sipping a whiskey. The knock of her front door bringing her out of her daydream, she picked up her handgun that she kept on her at all times. Growing up with The Shelby’s, she had to protect herself in someway. She kept it behind her, out of view for anyone who was in front of her, slowly creeping up to answer the door. She swung it open, gun clocked and pointed directly in the face of Thomas Shelby. Not wasted, but defiantly had a few.

“Ah, can never change a Shelby girl eh” He spoke, laughing slightly as she lowered the gun and he stepped inside. 

“Although, I’ve never been a Shelby girl, have I Tom?”

“Depends who you ask.”

She sighed, stepping in to the fire lit living room, “Drink?”

He nodded in response, and y/n began to pour him a whiskey, topping up hers and handing a full glass over to him. “Why are you here?”

He stepped over to her, the closest they had been together since before she left for London. He placed a hand on her back, pulling her head into touch his, their foreheads touching. The sensation ran through her body like the first time they had ever touched. He placed his hand on around the back of her neck, pulling her into him, his lips crashing onto hers. Their tongues intertwining with each others as the kiss started to deepen.  Y/n reached for his jacket, pulling it off his back, before making her way on to unbuttoning his shirt. Tommy pulled the bottom of her nightdress up, y/n only allowing the kiss to be broken to allow it to come over her head. 

Their lips syncing with each other once again as tommy took his now unbuttoned shirt off, moving onto unbuckling his trousers revealing his already hard length. He began to push her back onto the couch, untangling her lace thongs from around her legs. His fingers trailing over her already wet pussy, “Do it” y/n whispered as she pulled his face back up to kiss hers. 

He didn't even wait as he shoved his length into her. Their bodies rocked in sync together, “Tommy...” Y/n moaned, her fingers trailing down his shirtless torso. The stars were starting to align, the room was warm, full of love. It felt as though it was five minutes but in reality it was around fifteen all in.

Their breath shortened as y/n’s back started to arch as she came close to climax, “cum for me”. He spoke, looking at her directly in the eyes as he rocked her world. The love, chemistry, love and lust, all so very present just as it was back how they were before. Both of them moaning in pleasure, as they both came at the same time. The deep breaths and steamy windows showing the passion that had just unfolded. 

::::::::::::::::::::

It was a Friday evening, a week following the night of sin that taken place between Tommy and Y/n. They had still had the talks in private in the office, and on another occasion she was fucked bent over his desk after closing time. Y/n wasn't one to hide her feelings, it would always be present on her face so when it came to facing Grace in the Garrison, it wasn't hard to tell how y/n’s feelings were over her.  

Pol chuckled softly, clocking the glare Grace was on the opposite end of, “If looks could kill” Ada joining in on the hilarity. 

“She would've been killed 8 times over” Y/n replied, turning back to face the women. Whiskey in hand. 

“Feelings still there for him then?” Ada asked. 

“No, I wouldnt say so” y/n lied. 

“Cant lie to a gypsy woman love” Pol laughed, y/n begining to laugh with her when the doors open to reveal Tommy and his two bothers. Tommy’s icy blue eyes scanning the room, a slight smile shooting over to Y/n before approching the bar where Grace was, where he stood there for a good twenty minutes chatting away to her. 

“I cant take this anymore.” y/n looked over to Ada, who was rising her eyebrow while taking a sip of her drink. She was fairly close to them, and y/n being y/n liked to have a slight stir up now and again. She stood up, smile showing on her face as Pol and Ada laughed, watching her approach them both. 

“So, hows your little fling going?” she spok loud enough that Pol, Ada, Arthur and John could hear her. 

“Y/n” Tommy warned. 

“Who are you?” Grace questioned. 

“Y/N,” she responded, leaning herself against the bar, “The woman he has fucked behind your back multiple times this week.”

Pol snorted, almost chocking on her drink, “ I fucking knew it. Gypsy senses never lie.” 

“To be honest with you Grace, you had absolutely no chance when Y/N came back” Ada added. 

At this point, Tommy had moved y/n away from the bar, into the small room, “what are you doing?”

“You cant take the piss out of me, fucking me but then fucking her thinking youll get away with it.” she was pissed, and he could see it in her face. They had never spoke on their feelings toward each other. Everyone knew that it was always each other but there was nothing that compared to them, they always seemed to go back.

“I have always loved you but you left to go to London, I had people follow you. I knew what you were up to so I assumed you would stay down there, I assumed you had moved on.” He spoke, almost showing vulnerability.

“Oh I know. I can remember faces Tom. I think you forget I can see right through you,” she seethed, through her teeth, “what are you going to do about this?”

Tommy cupped her face, pulling her into kiss her.

“I love you.” He mumbled, feeling her smile into their kiss.

“I love you Tom,”

#thomas shelby imagine #peaky blinders #cillian murphy #tommy shelby #tommy shelby smut #tommy shelby x you #tommy shelby x y/n #tommy shelby fluff #tommy shelby x reader #tommy Shelby #tommy shelby imagine #peaky blinder fanfic

[angelfics]

Cherish you

couple : Jinyoung x reader

genre : romance, smut, angst

disclaimer: self esteem issues

word count: 1963

"I'd like to date you"

His words caught you by surprise, you were walking with your childhood best friend, Jinyoung, after a few weeks of busy schedule he came to your door and asked you to walk with him. You went to a park near your house at midnight to avoid fans screaming at your face.

He was sitting on the bench and you were standing by the fountain, watching the goldfish swimming peacefully, trying to remember how your conversation ended up here.

You stood there for a minute, the silence was overwhelming, you were trying to keep your thoughts steady, biting your lip.

He loved you? How was that possible? Jinyoung wasn't the boy next door anymore.

He was a famous idol now, a handsome boy who could kill you with just his looks and angelic voice.

And who were you? Someone who was struggling through college, no plans for the future or your life. You were known to be the clumsy girl who always gets in trouble, and not particularly pretty

Jinyoung was way better than you

"I don't like you"

————————————————————————

You sighed loudly and buried your face in the towel. Just after you thought you could avoid Jinyoung the day after your last meeting. Your parents had to invite him and his family over.

You did like Jinyoung, but he was out of your league, you had to lie and say you don't love him so he would give it up. He deserved better, better than you.

After last night's confession your feelings for him had gotten stronger and you felt terrible for letting him down.

You looked at your own reflection, put on some makeup to look lively, you didn't want anyone to know how you felt.

You wore a plain black dress, something comfortable and not too formal. You took a last look in the mirror and sighed deeply.

You walked down the stairs and looked at the empty dining room, the table was set and everything was ready. You heard the doorbell and waited for someone to open the door, but no one was downstairs so you had to do it yourself.

As soon as the door opened you were faced by Jinyoung and his parents, and you welcomed them. They all smiled widely except for Jinyoung, he looked pale and anxious, you probably looked worse.

You smiled weakly and moved away to let them in, Jinyoung was the last one to come in.

"hi.." he said quietly, you nodded and closed the door behind him.

During the dinner you were quiet, was it the right choice to let him down? The more you thought about it the more insecure you'd felt.

You looked up and saw Jinyoung looking at you, how long has he been staring? His food was untouched, you blushed and looked at your own plate.

Jinyoung grinned and started eating his food.

After dinner the grown ups decided to drink wine in the backyard, so you were left alone with Jinyoung in the living room.

"Can we go somewhere else?" Jinyoung looked around the room.

"fine.. Let's go upstairs" you sighed and stood up. You walked up the stairs and Jinyoung followed you.

You entered the room and waited for Jinyoung to come in. You closed the door behind you, Jinyoung looked around with wandering eyes, you looked at his back, he was perfect in all the ways possible.

"cut the crap" Jinyoung's voice brought you back to reality. You weren't expecting him to say this, but before you could say anything Jinyoung trapped you between the door and himself

Your eyes widened and your heart beat rose, he placed his hand on your cheeks and looked at you with a burning glare.

"why don't you believe in yourself? You deserve the world" he punched the door which made you jump "if only you could see yourself the way I see you" you shook your head and tried to hold back the tears.

"Trust me baby, just let me show you" he lowered his hand, caressing your face, his warm hands were enough for you to lose control.

"Let me show you, let me show you how much I love you" he looked you in the eye and before you could do anything you felt his lips on yours. His lips devoured you, all you could feel was his soft lips. You needed the sweet taste, the warm feeling, his lips were oxygen and you were desperate for air. Jinyoung moved you to the bed without breaking the kiss, he put you on the bed and pushed you down, you looked at Jinyoung and the smirk on his face, how could you say no to this man?

He leaned closer and kissed your lips, you wrapped your arms around his neck to bring him closer.

His lips, how his hands moved all over your body, he did make you feel loved. However when his hands tugged onto your dress you pulled away

Jinyoung noticed it and stopped

"Do you want me to undress first?" before you could nod he took his shirt off

"see? It's all right" you placed your hand on his bare masculine chest

"let me worship your body tonight" he moved away, you whined but he went lower and kissed your neck, you moaned, Jinyoung smiled and went lower.

Every movement made you feel good.

He unzipped your dress and you didn't argue, his hands stroking your body, you wanted to cover yourself up but Jinyoung's kissed distracted you

He brushed his fingertips on your waist, stomach and chest kissing you passionately.

He leaned back and scanned your half naked body, as if he was trying to memorize everything

"Jinyoung.." you mumbled, you couldn't bear his glance. Your hands moved to cover your chest

"no baby don't do this" he grabbed your hands and placed them on the bed.

"you're perfect" he pressed his lips on you body, kissing your neck

"So pretty and there is so much I haven't seen" he played with your bra straps.

"How is your skin so soft?" you chuckled and covered you face

"Let me take off my pants to be fair" Jinyoung walked away from you, his eyes never leaving you. He pulled down his pants and now he was only in his black boxers. His manhood was already hard.

And you knew you were going to be in pain

"Don't worry, baby, I won’t hurt you." He pressed his hand on your lower body gently to ease your tension.

You moaned, not in pain, but in pleasure.,

"Told you so" he chuckled, which made you smile too.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and brought his body closer.

"That's it baby, bring me closer." he whispered in your ear and licked your earlobe.

His hands went to the bra and opened it easily. He squeezed your breasts and kissed your neck while his body was hovering over you

The only thing you could do was moan through the good feeling

He lowered his head and approached your chest. You rubbed his hands along your hips. You had no control over his movements on your body. "I have been waiting for this for a long time," he said.

You did not know how each kiss he put on your body made you love yourself more. It increased your self-confidence.

"Will you let me?" He said softly as he played with the edge of your panties. You nodded and he took off the only clothes you were wearing. You were now naked.

"I'm so lucky to have you"

He threw your panties on the floor, you blushed out of embarrassment,

"I wish you knew how great you are," put his lips on your naked body and began to kiss you. You ran your hand through his hair and a faint smile appeared on Jinyoung’s face.

Slowly, he kissed you body until he reached below your abdomen

"You are great." He raised his head and said, He stuck out his tongue and wet your entrance slowly. You held your breath and raised your body a little. While he was still staring at you,

"Does it feel good, mm? I'll make you feel better" he said, You grabbed the bed sheets in response.

With half-closed eyes, you said, "Jinyoung" begged him to stop, but Jinyoung increased his speed. He did stop even for a second, instead he pressed his lips against your wet entrance. Your moans got louder.

His pace was constantly changing, he was slow, sweet and cautious, but when your moans filled the whole room, he became faster and harsher. When he finally moved away from your body, you called his name under your lips.

"Please" You said between your breaths

" Please what?" He stared at you with dark, hungry eyes. He licked his wet lips and waited for an answer

You said under your breath, "I want you." You wanted his body more than just his touch and kisses.

"Sure" He grinned and said, he lifted himself up on your body, leaving kisses all over you. It started with your belly and ended with your lips

You kissed his lips eagerly and grabbed his shoulders. He distanced himself from you between kisses and said

"Are you taking pills again? I didn’t bring any condom"

"yeah,, don’t worry"

You wrapped your hand around his neck and he brought his lower body closer to you,

You could feel the tip of the dick on your entrance. You moaned and bit your lip.

"Fuck Baby you’re too Tight"

He inserted his member. You moaned loudly and pressed your nails into his body.

He put his face in your neck and stood still for a few moments so that you could get used to his dick. "Baby, try to relax," he said under his breath. Jinyoung brought his face up and kissed your lips. Gradually the pain disappeared and pleasure took over . You loosened the pressure of your hands and ran your fingertips over his shoulders and back

Jinyoung, realizing that your pain had subsided, began to move his hips. At first, his movements were slow but deep, and with each movement he pressed against your inner walls.

The room was full of your vague moans, because you did not want your parents to hear anything.

Jinyoung praised your body second by second. Your beauty. The softness of your skin, how every little think makes your body perfect.

Gradually, his blows became more intense and violent. Your body was going up and down involuntarily

He took his hand to your cheeks and caressed it gently. You got lost in his dark eyes.

" I love you " He said under his breath.

You could no longer control yourself, your body was shaking. Your moans were louder. Every time you opened your mouth to say something, more moans came out and Jinyoung simply smiled and knew that your body was reaching its peak.

"Baby" he kissed your lips gently

Your body was drenched in sweat.

"Are you coming, mm?" A few more strokes were enough and you reached your orgasm. You pulled your head back and moaned loudly. Jinyoung pushed his whole dick inside you, his body was giving up too.

You kept repeating his name under your breath. You wrapped your legs around his waist to get closer to him. You grabbed his hair. His blows were hard again and his slow moans hit you hit, warming your body. Jinyoung came as he moaned loudly into you ear

"I love you." You swallowed and said in a soft voice, Jinyoung smiled and kissed your neck.

It did not matter what you imagined in your mind, Jinyoung could make you forget everything and be the happiest person on earth.

#jinyoung #got7 #ahgase #igot7 #fan fic #kpop fanfic #smut #romance #imagine

[sunflowerandco]

After the Fact: Act VII - The First of Three

Hey everyone :) here's another chapter, and we're back in present times. i wanted to thank Andy@straighttxhell for being a bilingual queen and helping me with the Spanish dialogue in this chapter you saved me!!

I hope you all enjoy <3

Courtney had her head buried in her textbook when she heard Duncan arrive home from work. She didn't mean to sound defeated in her delivery. "Oh, good. You're home."

He headed toward her study nook. "Missed me that much? What's wrong, Princess?" He questioned her, her look of frustration apparent on her face.

"I just can't get past this scenario in my textbook for my criminal law class."

"Sounds like my thing."

Courtney scoffed. "Hardly..." Duncan looked at her in utmost offense. "Oh, don't get offended. I just consider you...retired."

"That's more like it. I retired for a life in peace with my lady."

Courtney agreed playfully to appease him. "Yes, definitely." He leaned down, pecking her on her lips.

"But, yeah, what was the problem-thing?"

She turned her head over her shoulder to explain the dilemma, eventually turning the chair toward him. "Basically, they're asking me if this scenario requires prosecution: Person A shoots Person B in an attempt to kill them. However, Person B was already dead before Person A pulls the trigger. My question is: where does the line between motive and convenience become blurred? When does the defendant become a total liability for the damage done?"

Duncan hadn't felt this lost since he attended his Pre-Calculus class on accident. All he knew was that he has been referred to as 'defendant' a couple times in his life. "Well, the defendant could still be a good liar."

"...What?"

"You said he'd become a liability? But, how could that mess up his ability to lie?"

She closed her eyes as she tried to make sense of his statement. "Duncan... that has to be the most incoherent thing I've ever heard you say." She shamefully side-eyed to herself. "Why was that so hot?"

"Oh?" He smirked, egging her on. He still had no idea what he was talking about, but he liked flustering her in any way he could. He couldn't keep a straight face as he continued on. "I'm serious, babe! I've been a defendant enough times to know about lying abilities."

Courtney shook her head slowly, unbuttoning her shirt, but didn't let it fall. "That was so stupid. Fuck me."

Courtney never had to say those words more than once. They became one, an unconstrained, vocal Courtney flush against the wall with her legs wrapped around Duncan's waist clawing at his back.

***

Courtney groaned at the very last task she and Bridgette needed to complete: setting the table for the dinner both her and Duncan's parents were invited to in celebration of their engagement. A good amount of time had passed since the news broke. But, it was still an opportunity for everyone to meet and spend some time together.

"I'm just so freaking tired. I couldn't get out of bed this morning." Courtney handed the other end of the table cloth to Bridgette. "Duncan had to carry me to the shower."

Bridgette and Courtney lifted the cloth into the air, one losing sight of the other. Bridgette spoke as it slowly rested on top of the table. "Is he really that good?" She smirked as she smoothed out the edges with her hands.

"Please. Like his ego could use any more inflation..." Bridgette still waited for an answer, making Courtney give in. "Yes. But, he never tires me out to that point."

"Maybe you've been too stressed lately?"

"I suppose so. Planning this dinner, getting our families to come together all on the same day sure did wear us the hell out." They were done setting the table when Courtney raised the question. "Are you sure you don't wanna stay for dinner?"

"I'd love to, but..."

"But?!"

"I'm starting my fertility treatment today. Geoff and I have been trying for over a year, and we need the extra help."

Courtney pulled her into a hug. "I hope everything goes well. You know I love you. If you need to talk about anything, I'm here."

Bridgette took in her words before changing the subject. "Thank you. I love you, too, Court. So, what about you guys?"

"What about us?"

"You know... have you and Duncan talked about babies?"

She and Bridgette each sat on a dining chair in unison; Courtney sighed louder than she meant to in exhaustion. "I mean of course! But, I have this three year plan: finish law school, become a prosecutor, get married, and move out all in three years."

"That's quite the plan."

"Oh, that's nothing. I haven't even gotten to the two-year within the three-year plan."

"You have a plan for your plan?" Bridgette's head spun trying to wrap her head around Courtney's obsession with organization. "Never mind, the word's lost its meaning."

***

After their parents had done their formal introductions to each other, they settled into their seats for dinner. Besides story exchanging and pleasant conversation, Courtney had to deal with an occasional all-knowing stare from her mother. She tried her best to ignore it for the sake of a successful dinner. She was also coping with the fact that she was still hungry after eating her serving.

"Are you gonna finish that, babe?"

"Uh... no. Here, take it."

She smiled, scraping the last of Duncan's pasta on her plate. "Thank you. I just haven't eaten all day."

Courtney's mother called from across the table. "Can you help me with something in the kitchen, honey?"

Courtney nodded, getting up from her seat. They walked in together while her mother pulled her into a closer corner of the kitchen, speaking in a hushed tone.

"¿Por qué no me dijiste?"

Why didn't you tell me?

Courtney gave her a confused look, encouraging her to explain further.

"Que estás embarazada."

That you're pregnant.

Courtney furrowed her brows at her incredulous statement. "Qué? ¡No estoy embarazada!"

What? I'm not pregnant!

"Conozco a mi hija."

I know my daughter.

"Mamá! No digas tonterías!"

Mom, stop talking nonsense!

"No tienes que creerme. Pero aléjate de la champaña."

You don't have to believe me but stay away from the champagne.

Courtney rolled her eyes as Duncan walked into the kitchen.

"Everything okay in here?"

"Sí, mi amor- yes, everything's fine. Mamá just wanted me to take out this stack of plates."

"They're too heavy, cariño-"

Courtney widened her eyes and spoke through gritted teeth, signaling for her mother to stop this in front of Duncan. "I got it."

They all returned to their seats with Courtney demanding everything to be resumed to normal without her mother's theories.

***

Courtney stood in front of the mirror assembling her outfit for her very first mock trial. While she still struggled with her energy level hitting a new low, Courtney had been looking forward to this assignment for weeks. She brought out her favorite suit jacket and skirt to match, trying to slip it on with ease when she hit a snag at the button on her waist. Courtney tried her hardest to slip the button through until it eventually popped, landing on the floor.

"Goddamn it!"

Duncan called from the hallway as he approached their bedroom. "What happened?"

"My favorite skirt... I popped the damn button. I must've gained some weight." Courtney knew it was nearly impossible to stay the same weight she was five years ago, but was still sad to see her skirt go.

Duncan shamelessly eyed her backside. "Maybe there are consequences for havin' a fatty."

Courtney sighed defeatedly. "Now what am I gonna wear?" He gingerly held her by the waist, his arms wrapping around her torso, and eyed her through the mirror when he reassured her. "You would look amazing in anything, babe."

A smile crept the corner of her lips as she held the hands he wrapped around her. He let her go after pecking her on the cheek and she settled for a newer pantsuit that aligned with her figure. She was seconds away from heading out the door when Duncan called out to her; she only used her head to turn back to him.

"Hey! You forgot something."

"What?"

His hand swiftly slapped her ass and she yelped. She would've kicked him if she wasn't already about to miss her train.

"I'm going to kill you later!"

"I love you, too, Princess!"

***

She figured if she distributed her energy into the testimonies she'd ace the mock trial with flying colors.

Her body had other plans by the end of the trial.

Courtney tried to muster up the energy she had to give her mock closing argument. She used her arms to lift her up from the chair and she sauntered to the fake jury.

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, the evidence lays out right in front of you: the bloodied bat, motive, and an eyewitness that places the defendant right at the crime scene. Do not let Alicia become a statistic. Put her sadistic killer rightfully where he belongs."

She took a deep breath before she turned around to head back to her seat. Her head spun and she tried to focus on the seat she was getting to until it was too blurry to see. Her eyes shut as she fell onto the floor. She fell in and out of consciousness as she heard fragments of voices around her.

...an ambulance!

...she have a pulse?

Stay with me, Ms. Courtney.

***

Duncan received a call from the hospital and rushed out of the tattoo shop without much thought. When he reached Courtney's hospital room, Duncan found her mother standing outside exchanging pleasantries with the doctor. He assumed she had just made it there as well.

"Now, you're Mom and..?"

"Boyfriend," Duncan answered.

"Boyfriend." The doctor reiterated while shaking his hand. "I'm Doctor Holt and I've been taking care of Ms. Courtney. She's going to be fine. We're just monitoring her blood pressure, making sure she's getting some rest. Fainting is a common occurrence in the first trimester."

Duncan nodded, accepting the verdict until he realized the last three words that came out of the doctor's mouth. He furrowed his brow in confusion and disbelief. He took pauses, stammered over his words as he tried to catch his breath the last three words stole from his lungs. "Th-the first trimester? ...Of pregnancy?"

"Yes...?"

"I knew it!" Courtney's mother exclaimed in victory over her intuition. Duncan whipped his head to the left of him in shock.

"You knew?!"

"Well, not knew, per se. A mother can just tell." This time Doctor Holt chimed in realizing his mistake.

"I'm so sorry. I couldn't ask her about the possibility of her being pregnant. She kept falling in and out of consciousness and I just decided to draw her blood for a test. I needed to know to care for her properly. If you don't know, then that means she definitely doesn't know she's pregnant."

"If it's not too much, I'd like to tell my daughter the news."

"I'm not against that," Doctor Holt declared. "I just need to be in the room when it happens. I'll be back in about five minutes to see if she's awake." He turned to enter another patients room down the hall. Lorena looked over to her future son-in-law being uncharacteristically silent, looking at Courtney through the door's window.

"How are you doing, Pobrecito?"

He didn't divert his gaze. The longer he stared, the more he was able to accept the fact. A small smile crept upon his face seeing his girl so sound asleep. For once, Duncan didn't feel resistant to change. When he looked at Courtney he didn't doubt either of their abilities; only relief took over as he ascertained that she was his partner in this journey. The only thing bringing him out of his thoughts were the angry exclaims from Lorena.

"Now you decide to show up after all these years?!" Duncan turned to see a tall man with graying hair in a suit.

Courtney rarely spoke of her father. Duncan had an idea why she didn't; the words exchanged between her parents confirmed his assumptions and her apprehensiveness when he asked. There were some things Courtney just didn't talk about with anyone and Duncan felt he needed to respect that no matter the circumstance. Her father answered, his tone devoid of any emotion. Every sentence suggested his presence was strictly business and contrasted her Lorena's emotional articulation.

"I'm still on her emergency contact card, so I'm entitled to know the status of my daughter's health."

"You can't just decide to be a father whenever you want! She and Kate are past the age of needing their father, if you couldn't tell."

"Because, of course, you're doing a fine job." He retorted, gesturing to Courtney's state.

"What happened to her is no one's fault. Not even her own." Lorena crossed her arms in frustration, defensive over him undermining all of her work. "Courtney and Kate have their mother. I knew I didn't give our daughters your last name for a reason!"

Duncan intervened when he saw Courtney staring through the window. "Please! Stop. She's awake." He turned to her father. He knew nothing about him, not even his first name. Still, he immediately wanted to diffuse the situation to diminish any stress Courtney could be feeling. Duncan tried his best to steer him away without revealing any information. "It's your best interest to leave. The doctor told us Courtney is fine and we've got it under control, but she doesn't need any more stress as it is." Lorena had the last word before her father left Courtney again.

"If she needed you, she'd call you herself."

***

Courtney's eyes fluttered open to offending voices. She knew she was going to the hospital from what the EMT told her while she lied in the ambulance. She just didn't know how much time had passed between then and now. Courtney enjoyed the feeling of being well-rested before she sat up, squinting her eyes to catch a glimpse of the arguing pair in the hallway. Her eyes widened when she witnessed her mom pointing her finger at her dad while he stood there completely composed and unbothered. Courtney froze and could only stare at them in their usual mode of communication.

It took her back to the little girl watching her father make his yearly visit, her mother denying him access for the emotional protection of her daughters. She remembered watching from the top of the stairs, hoping her sister wouldn't wake from the sound of their parents fighting. At the age of ten Courtney promised herself she wouldn't let herself feel that helpless ever again. That she'd never let her father ever make her feel unwanted.

Their yelling ceased when Duncan interrupted the both of them, signaling to them about her being woken up. The next thing she saw was her boyfriend inaudibly addressing her father rather seriously. His hand gestures and facial expressions indicated he was dismissing him. It seemed to work. Her mother spoke again, but she didn't want to ask her what was said. Whatever she said made him walk away. Courtney's stress levels seemed to be more manageable as she waited on her family to enter her room. No less than a few minutes later Duncan and Lorena entered her room with her mother attaching herself to Courtney in a worrisome hug.

"My baby! Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm okay." She felt like she was comforting her mother more than anything. She patted her on the back as she gave Duncan a small smile while he let the two of them have their moment.

A doctor unfamiliar to Courtney followed along and introduced himself to her. "I'm Dr. Holt. Glad to see you're awake." He checked her blood pressure on a monitor before continuing. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine..." Courtney didn't feel comfortable with the diverse expressions strewn across the three of their faces. She turned to her mother who seemed to be eager to speak. "Why are you looking at me like that?" She couldn't tell the nature of her diagnosis that she hadn't received yet. Duncan seemed be to readying himself while her mother looked to the doctor for an 'okay' to give her the news. Doctor Holt nodded to confirm.

"Mija, you are pregnant."

Courtney looked up at her mom again, slightly embarrassed. She doubled-down on their discussion at the dinner party last weekend. "Mom, I told you to stop this in front of Duncan-"

"Baby," Courtney stopped and turned to him. He made eye contact with her and her face softened when his hand ran up and down her calf covered by the blanket. His eyes were reassuring as he tried to prepare her for his statement. "It's true."

Doctor Holt began to speak about how it's an early pregnancy, but any details disclosed by her doctor came and went as an abundance of thoughts pervaded Courtney's mind. She tried to pay attention to the advice he gave her. Manage stress, drink water, set a sleep schedule. She felt this news would be an added amount of stress to a mound caving in.

***

Courtney sat on a stool near Bridgette's kitchen island. She barely spoke out of nervousness, letting Bridgette handle most of the conversation.

"So, my test came out negative." Bridgette poured a hefty amount of wine into her glass. She held up an empty one to signal her offering Courtney some.

"Oh... I'm so sorry, Bridge." Courtney's nervousness raised after hearing the news. She noticed her nonverbal offer and tried to answer simply. "Oh, no thanks. I need to drink more water. Doctor's orders."

"It's okay. Maybe I was destined to have the exact problems my mom had. You know, I dread waiting for the results now. It's like I'm manifesting seeing only one line on that stupid, goddamned stick."

"Come here." Courtney pulled her into a hug, rubbing her back. The tears began to sting resting atop the brims of her eyes. Her initial reason for stopping by took a backseat in her mind. When they broke apart Bridgette immediately took to her defeated demeanor.

"I didn't notice before, but you look really worried. What's wrong, Courtney?"

"Nothing. I had something to tell you, but I don't think it's the right time."

"No... I ranted. Now it's your turn. It's not a friendship if only one person gets to unload their emotions." Bridgette reassured her. "Tell me."

"Okay." Courtney took a deep breath, instinctively clutching her stomach. "I just want to preface by saying I am in no means trying to make your day worse."

"...Okay..." Bridgette crossed her arms in confusion, but pointed to the hands on her stomach. "Are you...?"

Courtney nodded silently. Her expression became unreadable at her conflicting emotions. "Yes..." Tears started welling up into her eyes and she couldn't tell if she was happy or sad to bring those two words into her reality. She was practically whispering, hoping this change wouldn't bring any destruction to her realm. "I'm pregnant."

Bridgette smiled in shock. "Babe?? Congratulations!" Bridgette quickly brought her into a hug. Her reaction surprised Courtney given how upset she had been. "How far along are you? How did you find out?"

Courtney felt she should be smiling. She felt she should be incredibly happy at the fact. Instead a tear fell down her cheek. "A month. We just found out at the hospital." Courtney was adamant no one knowing about her stint at the hospital. "I only wanted to tell you, because I-I'm just trying to make sense of this and you're my best friend..."

Bridgette noticed Courtney was increasingly feeling less than thrilled the more she explained. "Are you keeping the baby?"

"We don't know, yet. Duncan was excited, but I'm just...- This was not my plan, you know? I haven't even finished school, yet. We can't afford a bigger place because I haven't started my career. This was supposed to come after. After the wedding, after school."

"I understand your feelings, and I'm with you no matter what decision you make. But, there's no set plan for life. Take a lesson out of whatever choice you make, and do what you think is best for all involved."

***

Courtney opened the apartment door and noticed a distinct smell coming from the kitchen. It reminded her of her favorite chicken her mother made for her and Kate when she got home from work early. She curiously walked into the kitchen to see Duncan in full chef mode. He greeted her

"Hey, babe. Are you hungry?  I'm making this recipe your mom wrote down for me the other day."

She only stood still as she watched him stir the contents of the pan.

There was nothing Duncan could get out of Courtney after the news broke about their pregnancy. She had completely shut him out for the rest of the week, burying herself in her homework, studying, and whatever else she could distract herself with. She couldn't look at him when they talked and her answers were shortened to simple, one-worded responses, or sometimes none at all.

He opened the refrigerator door behind him to fetch her a bottle of water. "Did you drink enough water today?" He held it out for her to take.

Courtney dropped her bag and rushed into his arms crying. this time she's wailing. Duncan is purely shocked; he's never seen her so emotional. He spent the better half of this week trying to get her to speak. But, he didn't expect this kind of response from her. He placed the bottle on the counter and wrapped his arms around her shoulders as he tried to console her in a hushed tone.

"Hey, hey, no... What's wrong, Princess?"

She was barely coherent, still sobbing over her words. "You're just... too nice. I haven't been nice at all ever since we found out. And you seem so ready and calm and I'm just neither of those things. What if I suck at being a mom? What if I can't make them happy?

"I'm calm because, one, I still wanted to treat you like I normally do. And, two, yes this is shocking news, but... it's you. if I'm gonna embark on this part of life, the only person I trust enough to do the best job is you." She faced him this time, still sniffling but calmed, and he continued.

"You're incredibly smart, ambitious, and beautiful. I'm cool, strong, and hot. Our kid wins the genetic lottery."

Courtney shook her head, half smiling. "Of course you'd point that out." She buried her head in his chest again, letting him run a hand through her hair.

"'Cause it's true," he said chuckling. "Whatever decision you make, I'm with you every step of the way. Okay?"  She nodded and he placed a soft kiss on her forehead. When they parted, he ordered her to relax in the living room while he continued cooking. In his mind, he knew everything would be alright; as long as he didn't burn the chicken.

A/N: hello and thank you for reading :) there will be more; hopefully soon. also

fatty=big butt don't worry duncan's not calling her a mean insult i swear lol

#duncney #td courtney #td duncney

[comradelup]

@taz-channukah-event / dec 17th: author’s choice!

“Yeah… no, I get it… I’ll tell them, we’ll be fine,” Taako says into the phone, peering out the curtain. The snow falls in big fat flakes, and there’s billions of them. He can barely see the end of the driveway.

He walks away from the window and starts pacing back and forth, very much aware of the three pairs of eyes on him.

“We should just be a tiny bit late, it isn’t that bad,” Lup says over the phone.

“They can’t hear you, Lu.”

“…Yeah, we won’t make it.”

Taako sighs heavily, a hand coming to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Okay. Okay. That’s fine.”

“It’s not! We wanna spend Channukah with our babies!” Lup whines, sounding very much like a baby herself.

“Well, first off, your youngest is five, hardly babies,” Taako says, sending a grin the kids’ way as he says it. Gordie, the five year old in question, giggles. “Second, it’s just one night, they’ll be fine.”

“…I guess you’re right.”

“Of course I am!” Taako says jovially, placing a hand on his hip and winking at the kids. “Uncle Taako’s always right!”

“Yeah!” the kids cheer, and he can tell Lup heard it, because she laughs wetly.

“It’s settled then!” Taako announces, adopting a goofy gesture as he addresses his sister. “You and Daddy hide at Grandma Marlena’s house, while Uncle Taako and his anklebiter army fights off the snowstorm monster!”

Gordie and Izzy giggle at that; Jo is the oldest and least entertained by this but they still smile at the silliness, which makes Taako feel a little less bad about how ridiculous he must look right now. He’s learned that uncle-hood means a lot of sacrificing your dignity for kids.

Izzy says, “Can we say bye to Mommy?”

“Duh!” Taako says, and he puts the phone on speaker to let the kids yell at Lup.

He lets them trade goodbyes and “Happy Channukah”s and everything else that parents and kids talk about. Once the call’s over, he pockets his phone and claps his hands together.

“So! We’re home alone with free reign of the place.” He leans down to grin conspiratorially at them. “What do we do first?”

“Let’s make latkes!” Gordie exclaims.

“I wanna play dreidel,” Izzy says.

“And what about you, fireball?” Taako asks Jo.

“I, uh… I gotta go to the bathroom,” Jo says quickly, standing up and darting away.

That’s… probably something to look into later. But for now Taako lets them go, yelling after them, “Make sure to wash your hands, dirty bird!”

The other two giggle, as intended. Taako crouches before them and says to Gordie, “But I guess I should be telling you that, huh pipsqueak?”

Izzy laughs at him. “Yeah, babies need their diaper changed.”

“I’m not a baby! I’m five,” Gordie says, holding up his hand for emphasis.

“Oh yeah? Well I’m seven,” Izzy says, holding up seven whole fingers while blowing a raspberry.

“And I’m four hundred and twenty-three,” Taako says, “Count that on your fingers.”

Izzy stares at her hands, trying to find a way to do that, but Taako scoops up Gordie into his arms before they get too into math, yuck.

“I’m up for latkes! Who said latkes?” he asks, spinning Gordie in a big circle to elicit a laugh from him.

“I did!” Gordie cheers.

“Then let’s go, latke boy!” Taako says, making an airplane noise as he flies Gordie into the kitchen, Izzy trailing after and saying something about getting a turn.

(Of course, she gets one. The duties of an uncle includes nearly tossing a tiefling girl into the air and not impaling yourself on the way down. At least she’s not the one who bursts into flame when too excited.)

They’re almost done with their first batch of pancakes when Jo leaves the bathroom. They sit down at the kitchen island looking rather gloomy. That’s not gonna fly, not in Taako’s (sister’s) kitchen.

“Hey, you’re ten, not sixteen, no emo angst,” Taako tells them, pointing a spatula at their face.

“I’m not emo,” they reply, sounding… empty.

Taako might not be as good an uncle as he thought; his kids shouldn’t be sounding like that.

“Gordie, Izzy,” Taako says, turning to his little sous-chefs. He tasked Izzy with (carefully) grating potatoes for their second batch and Gordie with cracking an egg into a bowl and (gently) beating it. But they both stop what they’re doing and turn to him.

He plasters on a mischievous smile and says, “Go into the guest room and get the dreidels from my bag on the bed. I brought all of my collection, so pick your favorites.”

The two practically get stars in their eyes and run off to go retrieve the tops. Taako turns back to his pan.

“Spit it out, what’s up with you?” He doesn’t phrase it as a question.

“…I don’t wanna talk about it,” Jo says.

“Is it ‘cause your parents aren’t here?” Taako asks, and his voice gets softer. He glances over in time to see Jo nod silently.

He sighs. At this age, Jo won’t be distracted from stuff with games and food, they actually think broadly. Fuck, Angus is their age and look at all the thinking he does! …Point is, Taako should’ve expected this.

“Listen,” he says, unable to have a formal heart to heart due to having to keep an eye on the food. “I know it sucks, I want ‘em here too. You think I’m happy spending a Channukah night without my twin sister? No way.”

“Then why are you acting like this?” Jo asks, looking impatient. “Don’t just pretend they aren’t here!”

“I’m not pretending, I’m distracting. Look, your siblings would whine and cry if I acted like you are right now. Do you want them to cry?”

“…No.”

“No, ‘cause I don’t wanna deal with the headache that’d give me,” Taako jokes, but Jo doesn’t smile. Taako sighs, moves the pan off the heat, and leans on the island across from them.

“I get that you're sad and I’m not telling you to not miss them, I get it. But we’ll see them tomorrow, and we can all spend the last night together.”

“But… I just miss them,” Jo says, and they’re pouting a little.

“I know kid, me too,” Taako says, “But! That’s the point of me being all upbeat and shit— don’t say that word.”

“I won’t.”

“Good. See, your parents would be mad or sad or whatever if they think you didn’t have any fun. All they want is for you to enjoy the holiday. Like, they’re probably having tons of fun at your grandma’s.”

(Lup and Barry are probably cuddled up on a loveseat and telling stories of the kids to Marlena; fun for them, but Taako would’ve fallen asleep five minutes in.)

Jo still doesn’t look totally convinced. Time to break out the big guns.

Taako leans in as close as he can while his feet are still touching the ground. “You wanna know the secrets to cheating at dreidel?”

Jo looks up at him. “You can cheat?”

“Oh yeah,” Taako says with a smirk. “She doesn’t do it with you kids, but your mom is the queen at cheating at that game. She would walk away from the table with her arms full of gelt.”

Jo looks delighted. Lup never lets her chaotic side show in front of the kids, so Taako’s stories about it are guaranteed to be attention grabbers.

“I can show you how she does it, if you want.”

“Yes,” Jo says, leaning in with their hands on the table. They may be adopted, but that wicked grin on their face just screams Lup.

“But you gotta promise that it doesn’t leave this kitchen, got it?” Taako asks. They can’t have the other two learning about it and they especially can’t have their parents learning he taught them.

“Promise.”

Taako smirks and stands back up to go back to his cooking. “Good.”

Soon they were all gathered around the dining room table with bellies full of latkes and trading gelt back and forth. Taako winks over every cheated spin, and Jo is laughing.

That’s the reaction uncles should be getting. Much better.

#taz #taz balance #taz fic #taz channukah #tazchannukah #txt #writing #balance #taako #gordie #izzy #jo #i guess i have tags for my ocs now. fun! #Please Talk To Me About My OCs Because I Love Them #happy hanukkah!!! feat. that Good uncle content #also Please Please Please lemme know if anything is inaccurate and i’ll fix it #taako may be a bit of a jerk to ango but he fully adores these kids

[slafkovskys]

too busy being yours / a. turcotte

☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★

my masterlist!

title from do i wanna know? by the arctic monkeys

before you read! with everything going on in the world, i would just like to put this out there. if you are not able to financially contribute to the black lives matter movement but would still like to help out, this post contains links to petitions that you can sign and some donation links as well. please take a look at it and do what you can. thank you and happy reading!

-

when the brown-haired, brown-eyed boy stumbled up the stairs onto your front porch, you couldn’t help but giggle. you were leaning against the wall outside your dad’s office as he wheeled in his first piece of luggage. your mom walked towards him with her arms outstretched and wrapped him in a hug, “how are you alex? was your flight good?”

he chuckles as he pulls back, stepping aside to let your dad in with his equipment. “i’m good. the flight was good. thank you for having me, mrs. hughes. it means a lot.”

she shushes him, rubbing her hands up his arms in the motherly way she always did even if it wasn’t one of her own children. “nonsense. we’re happy to have you, alex. you don’t have to call me mrs. hughes, it’s too formal. you can call me ellen.”

“okay, mrs- ellen,” he’s quick to correct himself at the sharp look she gives him.

“you can’t help, or are you too pretty?” jack interrupts your mother before she can speak again. he glares at you as he passes through the door.

“i’m too pretty,” you pout jokingly. alex, as though he hadn’t realized you were there, turns his head and looks at you with wide eyes. you hold up your hands and wiggle your fingers, “plus i just got my nails done jacky and, as you know, they weren’t cheap.”

your older brother rolls his eyes as he moves over to the stairs to set down alex’s duffel bag. your mother gives you a look before gesturing you forward, “this is y/n, the baby of the family even though she’s not the youngest.”

“the baby, the light of my parents’ life, just a few words commonly used to describe me,” you grin, holding out your hand for the boy to shake. almost tentatively, he does so.

“you forgot pain in the ass,” jack mumbles and your mother is quick to scold him. he flushes and apologizes, but you know that he didn’t fully mean it.

“are you hungry?” she changes the subject, turning to look at the house’s newest resident who nods. she grins before clapping her hands, “great! y/n can show you around while i make you something to eat. you don’t mind do you, y/n? perfect!”

she didn’t even give you time to answer before she turns around and walks towards the kitchen. jack follows quickly after her, “what about me? can you make me some lunch? mom?”

you chuckle at your brother’s antics before looking back at alex. “you don’t have to look so scared. i promise that i’m not gonna bite your head off or anything.”

he chuckles before scratching the back of his neck, “good to know?”

“c’mon alex. let’s go on a field trip,” you announce as you push off the wall. you point towards your dad’s office, “that’s the office. it really just holds all of the boys’ memorabilia, like they’re awards, pucks, all of that-”

“do you play?” he asks.

“i used to when i was younger, but i just decided it wasn’t for me as i got older. left it for the boys,” you shrug before pointing your finger in the direction of where your mom and brother had gone, “that’s where the family room, kitchen, and dining room are. down there is the basement where we have ping pong, the xbox, and other stuff. that door leads to the garage which is basically just the boys’ practice room. the only time there was a car in there was, like, the first day that we moved and we were unpacking stuff.”

he chuckles and follows you as you move towards the stairs, “mom and dad’s room is down here too, so we get the entire upstairs to ourselves which is pretty cool. i think that they regret it because when we argue, it can get pretty loud and they just hear us stomping around on top of their heads.”

“do you argue a lot?” he questions, following you up to the second floor where all of your rooms were.

you shrug, “i mean, we’re siblings. it’s more playful than anything. i’ll call jack a bitch, but i mean it in a loving way.”

“what about me?” you hear jack shout from downstairs.

“i was just telling him which room was yours!” you shout back, looking at alex threateningly. he holds his hands up in surrender, but the dimpled grin on his face tells you he wasn’t the least bit threatened by you. “speaking of rooms, luke’s is at the end of the hall. jack’s is there, mine is right here, and you get quinn’s old room beside mine.”

“lucky me,” he teases and you have to turn your head so he doesn’t see you flush.

you push open the door to his room and gesture him inside. “we didn’t unpack your stuff, but if you don’t see something, i think dad put some boxes in the closet too.”

“thanks,” he nods, moving past you into his new bedroom. he looks around, shoving his hands in his pockets. “does your mom care if i hang some things up, like pictures or posters?”

you shake your head, “it’s your room dude. do whatever you want with it, just don’t punch holes in the walls. that was quinn’s only rule.”

“i won’t,” he assures, taking a seat on the bed.

you sigh, “well, i’ll leave you to unpack your stuff. let me know if you need anything.”

“thank you,” he says as you turn which causes you to look back at him with a raised eyebrow, “y’know, for the tour.”

“anytime,” you wink, grabbing the knob of his door and pulling it behind you. you leave a crack before moving into your room next door. you shut your door fully behind you and press your back against it as bite your lip, “anytime.”

-

it was kind of strange how quickly alex had become part of your life, part of your routine. having him there was just natural. normal.

the first year flew by and when he came back for his second and final year in the program, the two of you were practically inseparable. you were never able to see him as another one of your brothers, but as more of a best friend.

you basically had an open-door policy for alex (something your brother’s had yet to obtain so they just barged in as they pleased) which never made it weird when he wound up in your room, either splayed across your bed or in the chair in front of your desk. currently, he had taken up residence at the latter as you tightened the string on your top.

you move to stand in front of your mirror, giving yourself a once over, “how do i look, al?”

“fine,” he says, sparing you a glance before looking back down at his phone. you groan and grab a boot before launching it towards him, “what the hell?”

“i don’t want to just look ‘fine’ alex,” you sigh, resting your hands on your hips, “i want to look mature. i want to be drop-dead gorgeous.”

“first of all you’re sixteen,” he holds up a finger, “and secondly, if i called you drop-dead gorgeous, your brother would probably break my leg.”

you flush, turning away from the mirror. you grab your sneakers before nodding towards your door, “let’s go down. avery’s gonna be here for me soon.”

“who’s all gonna be at this party that you’ve been so quiet about?” alex asks.

“her boyfriend probably,” jack teases, not looking up at you as you move into the family room.

“shut up,” you roll your eyes. you look at alex and he stiffens at the mention of the word ‘boyfriend.’ you shook your head as you sit down on a barstool to put on your shoes. “some friends from school. some u17s, nothing new.”

“you need to watch out for the- oh, no ma’am,” jack finally looks up. his eyes rake over your outfit and he pauses on the sliver of your abdomen exposed by the gap between your jeans and shirt. “not today, not ever. go change.”

“no,” you’re quick to respond, looking at him annoyed. “i’m wearing this.”

“no you’re not,” jack says, standing up. he points upstairs, “put on a shirt. an actual one.”

“jack-” you don’t have time to argue before your dad comes through the garage.

“dad, tell y/n that she needs to change!”

“where is she going?” he asks, looking at you. unlike jack, he didn’t make a face at your outfit. you were used to walking around in cutoff shirts or hoodies, so it was nothing new to see a bit of your stomach.

“a party,” jack states, and just for the extra nail in the coffin, he smirks, “with the u17s.”

“no, yeah you definitely need to change. sorry princess,” he walks over to press a kiss to your head before going back towards his room. you hear the door shut and you turn to glare at your brother.

“you-” you feel your phone buzz in your back pocket so you pull it out to check. it was avery and she was outside. it was then that you were thankful for how punctual she was. you smirk, looking back at the two boys. “actually, i don’t have time. my ride’s outside. don’t wait up.”

you take off towards the front door. you hear jack shouting after you as you tear through the front yard and open the backdoor of avery’s car. both avery and lily (who was in the passenger seat) look at you concerned, but you shook your head, “drive.”

she listens, pulling away from your house before jack could catch up. she barely makes it out of your neighborhood before your phone lights up. it was a text from alex.

alex t

for the record, you did look drop dead gorgeous, he’s just being an ass

have fun and don’t do anything i wouldn’t do ;)

you don’t even realize you’re grinning until avery calls you out on it, “who are you texting? you’re grinning so hard it looks like it hurts.”

“nobody,” you try and lie, but your voice crack gives you away. both girls giggle and pester you some more, “fine, fine. it was brett. happy?”

“no it wasn’t,” lily shakes her head, but the conversation is thankfully dropped.

that night as you danced around with your friends, hung around with brett who you were kind of talking to but he always seemed to forget that, and even during that, your mind was on alex. his smile, his stupid dimples, him.

that was when you realized how fucked you were.

-

it was one thing everyone around you noticed, how close you and alex were. while your family had grown used to it, anyone who didn’t live in the house always made sure to tease you two about it.

“so now that he’s gone,” trevor’s voice drops as jack leaves the room to go and grab his wallet that he’d left upstairs, “you can tell us the truth. are you two like-” he puckers his lips and leans towards patrick who shoved him away.

“trev, i love you man, but not that much,” patrick says and you giggle. alex’s hand squeezes your ankle and you look at him to find him already staring at you. “but seriously,” patrick says, “what is up with you two? and don’t say that you’re just friends because this isn’t friend shit.”

he gestures to where your legs were thrown over alex’s lap and the hand alex kept on your ankle almost protectively. you weren’t daft. you had also noticed how alex had changed when it came to you, you just chose not to bring it up. you were scared that if you did, if you asked if the feelings were mutual and they weren’t, it would scare him off and you weren’t ready to lose this side of alex so you just kept your feelings to yourself.

“we’ve been planning this for weeks, pat. it’s not my fault that it fell on boys night,” alex shrugs, turning to look at the massachusetts native. “i’ll be at the next one.”

“what happened to ftf? what happened to bros before,” he pauses, rethinking his choice of words, “other bro’s sisters? no offense y/n. you’re beautiful.”

“thank you. none taken,” you laugh at him. you press your heel into alex’s thigh which causes him to look at you, “you can go if you want. i can just watch it alone, al. it’s no big deal.”

“no, you wanted to watch this together, so we’re watching it together. i made a commitment to you before i did to them,” he shrugs and you sigh.

trevor huffs before running a hand over his face, “pat, we’ve officially lost him.”

“who did we lose?” jack asks, coming back into the room with his wallet and keys in hand. he looks at alex, not even paying attention to where his friend’s hand rested because he was so used to it, “you sure you don’t want to come man? i’m positive it’ll be more fun than watching hocus pocus and eating mac and cheese.”

“i’m good,” he replies to your brother who rolls his eyes.

“can you just go already? you’re killing my halloween vibe,” you whine. the four boys laugh before jack walks forward and places a kiss on top of your head, “love you jacky. be safe.”

“love you too princess,” he says, moving over to alex. he tries to hug him, but alex shoves him away. jack puts on a show, a pout on his lips as he whines, “but i love you turcs.”

“i love you too jack, but i’m not your sister,” alex kicks jack in the leg when he tries to lean on again. you pull your legs back when alex stands up as they start to tussle around.

trevor and pat are in the background watching, waiting for jack to finish because he was the driver. it lasts for only a minute before they separate and fix their clothes. alex sits back down and pulls your feet back into his lap immediately, draping his arm over them to weigh them down.

the three head towards the door, but trevor hangs back to say one final thing, “goodbye lovebirds.”

both of your faces flame as trevor walks out of the door cackling. you sink into the couch, hoping it would swallow you whole as alex turns to you, “i’m sorry about him. i keep telling him-”

“don’t worry about it,” you shake your head. you look at the time on your phone before sitting up, “do you wanna do a face mask? you wanna do a face mask.”

as he always did, he goes willingly when you drag him off the couch. though you didn’t need to pull him all the way up the stairs by his wrist, you did. you craved that physical contact with him. you wanted to hold onto him so he wouldn’t slip away, not like he would.

you lead him into your bathroom which was connected to your bedroom. when you first moved in, you discovered that there was only one bedroom that had an attached bathroom so you were quick to claim it. you’d had to share with the boys before and it was an experience that you didn’t wish to have again.

“can i do the purple sparkly one that you had on last week?” he asks as he hops on the counter in the empty space beside the sink. you look at him with a raised eyebrow. “what?”

“you noticed that?” you bend down and open the cabinet, grabbing the jar.

“i notice a lot of things you do,” he mumbles, probably thinking that you wouldn’t hear him but you did. that was one thing about alex, he was terrible at whispering.

you take a deep breath before standing, grabbing a headband for yourself and a scrunchie for him. you move to stand between his legs, “we need to pull your hair back so it doesn’t get stuff in it.”

you run your hands through the front of his hair, gathering it in a tiny bundle before tying the scrunchie around it. he had closed his eyes and you giggle, pulling out your phone. he peeks open an eye, “what are you doing?”

“i’m taking a picture al. smile,” you demand. he does so, giving you his real smile and not his normal one. you smile at the picture, “you’re cute.”

“let me see,” he says, leaning forward to look at your phone. he looks at the picture and shakes his head, pressing the ‘x’ in the top left corner. “you’re deleting that.”

“well, i already saved it so,” you shrug, turning off your phone and placing it on the counter. you twist open the jar and scoop some onto your fingers, “hold.”

he takes the jar from your hand with a chuckle, “yes ma’am.”

he lets you apply the mask, not talking or moving too much because this wasn’t the first time he’d done this with you. unlike your brothers, he was more than willing to do face masks or let you do his eyebrows. he probably would never admit it, but deep down you knew he liked it.

“let me do you,” he says, tightening his legs around you as you finish and try to move to the side. “please?”

“okay, but you have to do a thin layer or else it will take forever to dry,” you say and he shakes his head. “sorry, i’m sorry.”

his fingers are gentle as he rubs across your face, applying the mask evenly. he tucks your hair into your headband when it keeps falling out. “don’t want that to get stuck,” he would say to himself.

he smiles when he’s finished. you move your head to the side to look in the mirror, giving him a nod of approval. he hops off the counter as you move to stand in front of the sink.

“i have a question,” alex announces as you wash your hands. “a hypothetical question.”

“well i have a hypothetical answer to your hypothetical question,” you send him a smile through the mirror as you shut the water off and grab a towel. “what’s up al?”

“hypothetically, if i were to ask you out on a date, what would you say?” the look in his eyes tells you that he was nervous, fearful even of what you might say.

“hypothetically, i would say yes,” you turn to face him, playing with sleeves of the grey, wisconsin long sleeve that belonged to him, but was currently on your body. “but if you don’t ask me, i can’t say yes.”

“okay, that’s good,” he whispers to himself, moving in front of the sink after you. he didn’t ask after or when you walked back downstairs. he didn’t ask as you started your october first tradition (which he’d only been a part of since last year) of making mac and cheese and watching hocus pocus. he didn’t ask as you washed off your face masks. he didn’t ask as you got closer on the couch and ended up pressed into his side with his hand under your shirt.

it wasn’t until later that night when you were tucked under your comforter ready to slip into unconsciousness that alex walked through your door. he perched himself on the edge of your bed and leaned over you. “hypothetically,” he grins at your giggle, “would you let me steal you away this weekend?”

“i would,” you raise your hand to thumb at his cheek. he leans into your hand and you smile sleepily, “can we stop being hypothetical now?”

#alex turcotte #alex turcotte imagine #nhl imagine #hockey imagine #la kings #my work

[inlovewithfictionals]

Be True Pt.2 (Jason Todd x Reader)

A/n: I half-wrote this a month ago, but then I decided to make it Christmas themed. And so here it is, the part two to I Need You Alive. Another thing, I have 0 experience on “meet the parents” thing so this might not be that realistic :’)

Keys: Y/H/T: Your Hometown, Y/M: Your Mum, Y/D: Your Dad

Genre: Fluff, duh.

Warning(s): Jason is most likely a bit OOC (I’m not so sure where to put the Todd into a family meeting, forgive me.), I didn’t proofread this yet so beware the spelling or grammar mistakes.

That being said, I hope you enjoy this!

Word Count: 1903

   Snowy road, a small morning light shines, Christmas songs on the radio, a calm and comfortable silence between Y/N and Jason in the car. At least for Y/N. Jason on the other hand, he’s nervous.

   The two are on the way to Y/N’s parents’ house. They had planned this a few months back, but due to Jason being Red Hood and needing to help the Batfam, they had to hold it back. And finally, here they are. On the way to Y/H/T for Christmas. And Jason as I said earlier is nervous.

   His body is a little tense, hands gripping the steering wheel, traces of worry on his face. It wasn’t until he let out an audible sigh when Y/N notices that her boyfriend is in distress.

   “Jaybird, what’s wrong?” She asked, putting a hand on his shoulder.

   “Huh? Oh nothing.” Jason hesitantly answered.

   Y/N’s brows creased, tilting her head slightly. And then a small smile shows on her face, “Anxious? Nervous again? I thought I already said that my parents likes you?”

   “But I never met them in person. What if the first official impression is bad? They’d change their minds.” He let out another sigh, slowing the car down when he realized that he’s gone a bit too fast on his anxious state.

   After a moment of focusing on the road ahead, he heard Y/N giggles. Jason glanced at her for a while before he turn back to the road. “What? What is it?” He asked.

   “Nothing, it’s just- you’re THE Red Hood, you fight crimes at night like a badass, gone on dangerous missions and such with Batman and the others, and yet here you are afraid of meeting my parents.”

   “I’m not ‘afraid.’ I’m just worried.” He argued.

   Y/N puts her hand that was previously on Jason’s shoulder on her mouth to stop herself from letting out a laugh, which didn’t really work since Jason could still hear her. Nonetheless, he chuckled along with her. “Okay, fine. I’m a little afraid. Just a little.”

   Y/N’s laugh dies down as she shakes her head, “There’s nothing to be afraid of. My parents are chill. Sometimes strict, but they’re nice people. Besides, it’s just for a day. Trust me when I say you’ll be fine, you big dork.” She chuckles, leaning to his side to kiss his cheek and give him a reassuring smile. Jason’s shoulder falls in a relieved manner. He nods slowly, indicating to Y/N that he’s okay now. Well, at least, better than before.

   “Okay. I’m alright. I’m Jason Peter Todd, the second Robin and now Red Hood, and I’m gonna meet your parents and they’re gonna fucking like me!” His voice gets louder and more energetic on each word he says.

   “That’s the fucking spirit, Todd!” Y/N announced.

   Once again, both of them goes on to another laughing session.

   This might not be as bad as I thought, Jason thinks.

. . . .

   They arrived at Y/N’s parents’ house just a few hours later around 11 AM. Given the fact that there was not a lot of traffic jams and the snow is not pouring like that scene from Frozen.

   Jason parked the car and turn down the engines. He takes a deep breath, turning his head to Y/N, who’s taking off her seatbelt and wrapping her neck and half of her face with a scarf.

   “Are you ready?” She asked.

   “Yeah. Yeah, I’m ready.”

   With that, they stepped out of the car and walks to the front door. Y/N knocked the door a few times, “Mum, Dad! I’m- we’re home!”

   There are rushing-footsteps sounds coming from inside of the house, followed by a small and cheerful, “It’s them! Coming!”

   The door opens to reveal a friendly looking woman wearing a cream coloured sweater and some comfortable black pants. Her face lights up even brighter when she looked at Y/N and Jason. The woman then rushed to hug Y/N with an enthusiastic laugh.

   “Y/N! You’re here! Oh and merry Christmas, sweetheart!”

   “Merry Christmas to you too, mum. Missed you. Sorry we took so long to visit.” Y/N said hugging her back.

   “Oh it’s fine. I know how busy you are.” Her mum smiled at her. She takes a look at Jason for a second, before she went up to him and hugging him as well. “You must be the guy Y/N is whipped for. She talks a lot about you. That explains why I was eager for you to visit. Also, merry Christmas, Jason!”

   A subtle blush shows on Jason’s face. Maybe it’s the cold, maybe it’s the fact that Y/N’s mum said that her daughter talks about him to her parents. His tense body slowly ease into her embrace, a smile shows up on his face. “Merry Christmas, Mrs. Y/L/N. Sorry for making you wait.”

   “Again, its fine, Jason. All is well here, no worries! And please, call me Y/M. Don’t be so formal.” She smiles at Jason. Even on this cold day, like Y/N’s, Y/M’s smile is capable of warming him. Ah, so that’s where she inherited the personality from.

   “Now come on, brunch is ready!”

   Y/M opens the door wider and made a motion with her hands for Y/N and Jason to come in. They took off their beanies, scarfs, outer jackets, and puts them on the hanger inside, beside the door.

   “Y/D? They’re here!” Y/M announced as she walks to the kitchen with Jason and Y/N trailing behind.

   “Wait! I haven’t put on my sweater!” A male voice replied from the living room.

    Y/N stops her track and peep her head into the living room to see her dad standing up from the couch just after he puts the sweater on. He was wearing a classic green-red-white Christmas themed sweater with little snowmen on it and a pair of dark grey pants.

   “Dad! Merry Christmas!” She made her way to her father’s embrace.

   “Merry Christmas, little one.” Much like her mum, he has a friendly face decorated with a grin. “Is he here?”

   The girl nodded and turns her head towards Jason who was waiting by the entrance. He realized that they were waiting for him, so he took soft but quick steps to them. Y/N grabs his arm and pull it close. Sort of like she’s hugging Jason’s arm.

   “Dad, this is Jason. The one you ‘want to intimidate.’”

   “Nice to meet you, Mr. Y/L/N.” Jason says, putting his right arm for Y/D to shake.

   Y/D completely ignores the hand and sling his arm on Jason’s shoulder as Y/N lets him go. His eyebrows scrunched, looking at Jason like he’s inspecting him to see if he’s a good news or bad news. Once again, Jason feels afraid under his stare. But that feeling was quickly wiped away when Y/D smiles at him and shaking his hand.

   “Just Y/D is okay. Nice to meet you, Jason! Are you treating her right?” He asked, patting him and nods his head to Y/N.

   “I sure hope I am. Y/N, what do you think?”

   “Eh, you’re okay.” She teased.

   Jason fake gasped while Y/D snickered. “How could you say that? After everything we’ve been through!”

   “I’m joking! He’s amazing, dad.” She laughed.

   “Good, as expected then. Now come eat your foods! It’s not staying warm forever you know?” Y/M’s voice called from the living room entrance where Jason was standing before. She was leaning on the frame, with her hands crossed like a mother who’s playfully scolding her 5 year old. Or- olds.

   All of them then went to the kitchen and sit in the dining area. They shared random lighthearted conversations. At times, Y/N’s parents asked Jason about himself which Jason had to answer without telling them about his nighttime persona. In the middle of the whole funny, embarrassing, or adventurous stories they share, Y/N puts her hand on Jason’s thigh and squeeze it lightly to get his attention.

   “See? They like you.” She whispered to him. Jason just gave her a cocky smile, “of course they do.”

   “Bold thing to say for someone who’s afraid to go here a few hours ago.”

   “That was natural reaction, Y/L/N.” He whispered back,

   “Sure. Whatever you say, Red Hood.” She leans closer to his ear and whispered more quietly on the last part so that her parents won’t hear.

   ��I swear, if you’re gonna compare the Red Hood me and THIS me again…” Y/N just giggled at him making her parents look at them with fond smiles.

. . . .

   What was supposed to be an hour brunch turned into 3 hours. They got caught into the conversations. Plus, Y/M feels the need to show Jason Y/N’s old pictures to which Jason took pics of and he definitely sends it to Grayson.

   Now Jason and Y/D are sharing hot chocolate in the living room while the girls are in the kitchen tidying things up while chit-chatting happily. Girl things probably…

   Jason stares at Y/N from his seat. As cliché as it sounds, the light coming from the window made her look pretty almost like a scene from a movie. Not that she’s not pretty before, but right now she’s exceptionally pretty. She’s not perfect, physically nor mentally. He knows that. And he wouldn’t have it any other way.  As he smiled at her, she smiled back before continuing her talk with her mum.

   “You really love her, don’t you?” Y/D suddenly asked.

   “I do. I do, sir.” He softly answered making Y/D hum in an accepting manner.

   He hesitated, but Jason Wonder Woman-ed up and leans closer to Y/D just in case the girls could hear him. They might not be able to considering the flow of their girl-talk, but he’s being careful. “Sir, I know this is too soon but I was wondering… Do I have your blessing to take her hand? I’m not going to do it yet in a short time and I know we’re still early in the relationship, but am I good enough for her to you?”

   Y/D’s lips thinned. Right now, he looked seriously intimidating to Jason. He takes a deep breath before looking at the robin again. “To be honest, I don’t think anyone is good enough for Y/N. Not in my eyes at least. She’s precious, gentle, and yet- she’s brave and strong. Complete with flaws but that doesn’t make her any less of a woman. My little princess. The last thing I want is for someone to break her in any way.”

   Jason looked down to his mug, tracing the rim of the mug. His heart fell little by little when he heard those words. Y/D sipped his hot chocolate, looking at the almost empty mug.

   “That being said, be true with her, Jason.”

   Jason’s eyes shot up from the mug up to look at him. “Sir?”

   “You’re enough for her. Hurt her and I’ll hunt you down.” Despite the threat, he still give Jason a fatherly pat on the back and his smile is back. Jason chuckled shakily, nodding his head. “Thank you and don’t worry,” he glances back at Y/N, “I don’t plan on hurting her.”

. . . .

   “You really are her father, aren’t you?” Jason questioned.

   “I am. What’s with the sudden question?” Y/D asked back with a confused smile and one eyebrow raised.

   “It’s just that you can threat someone with a very innocent face. Y/N does that a lot.”

A/n: Have a happy Christmas, everyone! I hope you got what you wanted for Christmas this year.

Masterlist

#jason todd x reader #jason todd x you #jason todd imagine #jason todd fluff #Jason Todd #merry chrysler #red hood imagine

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Won’t You Stay (Part 5)

Summary: The reader has dinner with her family and Jensen and the pair finally make a decision on their friendship...

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x Director!reader

Word Count: 2,900ish

Warnings: language

A/N: Please enjoy!

______

Saturday Night

“Should I ask Marcus to winter formal?” asked Ella, pacing around her room nonstop. You raised an eyebrow at her from where you lay on her bed, Anthony shaking his head from the other side. “I was asking Y/N, not the guy that won’t even go with his boyfriend.”

“Ella,” you said, hanging your head off the edge of her bed. “If Anthony doesn’t want to go broadcast something he doesn’t want to, he doesn’t have to. Also, you don’t need a date. Go with your friends. It’s more fun anyways.”

“Yeah but Marcus is cute and all my friends have boyfriends,” she said, sighing as she stood in front of her closet and held up her dress.

“Don’t have a boyfriend because your friends do, Ella. It is so not worth the aggravation,” you said. “Boys are never worth the aggravation.”

“Agreed,” they both said, a tiny smile on your face.

“Why’d you break up with Logan again?” asked Anthony. You sighed and let out a long groan. “He was good looking.”

“Being attractive has nothing to do with having a good relationship,” you said.

“Yeah, but like even mom and dad don’t know what happened between you-” said Ella, cutting herself off when you sat up with a glare.

“I thought I asked you two to never bring him up again,” you said. “It’s over and that’s it.”

“Did he cheat on you?” asked Ella. You scoffed and closed your eyes. “If he cheated-”

“Mind your own fucking business,” you snapped. She stared at you, a little misty eyed and you squeezed yours shut. You’d never swore at her before and knew she’d beat herself up about it if you didn’t nip it in the bud. “El, I’m sorry. Logan...he broke my heart. It hurt. A lot. I thought he was the person I was going to end up with. He wasn’t the person I thought he was though. Obviously it’s still a sensitive subject for me. I don’t want to talk about him anymore.”

“Sorry,” she mumbled. She went over to her window seat and plopped down, turning her head to look out the dark window. 

“Ella bear,” you said, standing up and walking over, sitting next to her and pulling her into a hug. “I love you.”

“When I broke up with Brady, you told me it wasn’t the end of the world and it felt like it,” she said, looking up at you. “Why’s Logan different?”

“Things are different when you’re older, when you’re in a long term relationship and it ends,” you said. “Forgive me?”

“Yeah. Sorry,” she said, giving you back a hug before she set her sights on Anthony. “So what’s the deal with you and Nolan?”

“He kinda wants to tell his parents about us and I don’t want to do that until mom and dad know and I’m not ready to tell them,” he said, tossing his baseball up and down. “Y/N, what do you think?”

“Well it’s a personal thing. You should tell them when you’re ready. If Nolan’s ready that’s his choice but he should respect yours too,” you said.  “Honestly if you two are going to keep having sex though, maybe-”

“Y/N,” he groaned. “I thought I told you not to talk about that stuff with Ella here.”

“I took health class too, idiot,” she said.

“I’m not talking about sex with my little sister,” he said. 

“She’s sixteen. She knows what it is,” you said. “If you can’t talk about it, you shouldn’t be doing it.”

“I don’t get the big deal in telling mom and dad you have a boyfriend,” said Ella. “They wouldn’t have a problem with it.”

“I’m just not ready, El. Forget I said anything,” said Anthony, tossing his ball one more time before you caught it.

“Don’t let Nolan pressure you into saying something either, okay?” you asked. Anthony smiled and nodded. 

“He wouldn’t. We’ll just wait until we’re both ready to tell them,” he said. You tossed his ball back, the doorbell ringing in the distance.

“Kids! Our guest is here!” shouted your dad from downstairs. 

“Guest? God, is it another stupid studio executive?” groaned Ella as she stood up. “I hate those guys.”

“It’s dad’s costar. Jensen Ackles,” you said, waving them both to follow you. “He’s nice. You’ll like him.”

“What’s he been in?” asked Anthony. “He sounds vaguely familiar.”

“Some of those teenage shows you like. He was on some horror show for a few years and stuff before that,” you said. “Come on you two.”

Anthony typed away on his phone as they dragged their feet down the hall, freezing and getting a sigh from you.

“Oh wow,” said Anthony, holding up his phone for Ella to see. “He’s hot.”

“Oh, move over Gil Nicholas,” said Ella. “He is so much better looking. He’s taller too.”

“Guys. Behave,” you said as you walked towards the top of the stairs. You headed downstairs with them on your tail, Jensen handing over his coat to your mom in the foyer. “Hey, Jay.”

“Hey,” he said, smoothing out his light blue button up. He had a pair of nice jeans on, some red and blue socks on his feet, a pair of boots tucked away on the mat by the closet door. “You must be Ella and Anthony.”

“Well hello,” said Ella, pausing at the bottom of the stairs, looking him up and down. You rolled your eyes and smacked her arm.

“Ella. Stop staring at him like he’s meat,” you said. “Excuse her. She’s normally not such an idiot.”

“What? He’s hot,” she said as your mom stepped back over and tilted her head.

“Ella, that’s rude. I’m sorry for my daughter,” said your mom to Jensen. “Ella apologize.”

“Sorry,” she said sheepishly.

“It’s okay,” said Jensen with a chuckle. “I heard someone had a rough volleyball game yesterday and someone else had an even rougher AP History test.”

“Uh yeah,” said Anthony. “How’d you know that?”

“Your dad likes to brag about you guys,” said Jensen with a smile. “A lot.”

“Guys, please go set the table,” said your mom, shooing them out of the foyer. They both headed for the dining room, Jensen standing there with you looking around. 

“Your house is beautiful, Mrs. Y/L/N,” said Jensen, tilting his head up to look at the beams going up across the two story foyer area. “And massive.”

“Thank you and it’s Dani, Jensen,” said your mom, offering him a friendly smile. “Y/N. Entertain Jensen for a moment. We’re running a few minutes late with dinner.”

She went back towards the kitchen, Jensen walking slowly with you down the main hall, looking at a few pictures hung on the wall.

“Aw, that’s adorable,” he said, pointing at a picture of you and your dad from your first day of kindergarten. He didn’t look too much different nowadays, maybe a little less boyish but you’d seen him wear the same shirt on Tuesday to work. You had on a tonka truck shirt and purple shorts, hair pulled back in a high pony. You rolled your eyes and he let out a laugh. “You look cute.”

“Dad tried his best. Fashion has never been his expertise,” you said.

“When did your mom come into the picture?”

“I was ten. It all happened very quickly. They got married and started having kids soon after that,” you said. “Anthony and then Ella.”

“Even the perfect people’s lives aren’t as perfect as they seem,” he said, looking at one of you behind a film camera when you were little. “You’re lucky to have a dad like him.”

“I know I am,” you said. He smiled and walked down the hall some more, stopping at a few pictures, smirking at one in particular. “Oh shut up, Ackles.”

“That is a perfect picture if I do say so,” said Jensen with a laugh.

“I fully agree,” said your dad as he popped out from the kitchen. “She’s got a hell of a mess of bed head. Still does.”

“I can see,” he said, giving you a shit eating grin.

“I so love it when we have guests over,” you said, your dad pushing you both into the kitchen.

“What’s your poison, Jensen?” asked your dad, holding up a bottle of red wine. Jensen spun around in circles, taking in the space and the open family room. “Kid.”

“I’ll have a glass of whatever’s open,” said Jensen, returning his attention to your parents.

“I can get behind that. Y/N,” said your dad, sliding the bottle over to you. You hummed and poured four glasses, handing one to Jensen. “The house isn’t that nice.”

“You should see my apartment,” mumbled Jensen.

“You’re over in Sunrise Ridge, right?” he asked. Your ears perked up and your dad laughed. “I’m surprised you remember.”

“I remember the pool,” you said.

“You guys lived over there?” asked Jensen. Your dad nodded and took a drink. “Seriously?”

“We all start from somewhere,” said your dad. “Someday soon maybe you can get in a nicer place.”

“Yeah. I wouldn’t mind it,” he said. 

“How are you feeling, Jensen? Ethan said you were hurt on set this week,” said your mom as she worked on the other side of the island.

“Oh, I’m okay. A few bandages and I’m good as new,” said Jensen. “Y/N’s actually the one that made sure I didn’t get hurt worse. I think she got in a bit of trouble over it.”

“Yeah well, that’s my job,” you said as you sipped on your glass. 

“Y/N was almost a nurse actually before she worked in an office for a few years. She likes helping people,” said your mom. “We were a little surprised she followed her dad’s footsteps.”

“Well stories help people,” said Jensen. “They can be hopeful or inspiring. I mean, the story Y/N wrote was very inspiring. That helps people.”

Your parents glanced at one another and shared a look.

“I like him,” said your mom, Jensen chuckling. “Do you have a girlfriend, Jensen?”

“Uh, no. I’m on my own at the moment,” he said. 

“Enjoy being single,” said your dad. “Both of you.”

“Well the girls will be fawning over you once the movie comes out,” said your mom. “May need to look into a bodyguard.”

Jensen laughed but no one else did, his face quickly frowning.

“Wait, you’re serious?” he asked.

“Uncle Brody hangs out sometimes with dad or us,” you said, Jensen raising an eyebrow. “Uncle Brody is dad’s bodyguard if you didn’t catch that.”

“Being famous has its occasional flaws,” said your dad. “If this thing blows up though, which odds are it might, let me know and we’ll get you hooked up with someone. It’s not an all the time thing, I promise.”

“Here I thought I was just playing a character,” said Jensen.

“Are you playing Lyle?” asked Anthony as he walked in with Ella. Jensen spun around with a smile and hummed. “Wow, he’s even got green eyes like him too.”

“Don’t you hate when those pesky authors throw out specific character traits,” chuckled your dad. You gave him a look, your mom handing a few dishes to the other guys to carry into the dining room.

“I was willing to compromise on the eye color when it came to the actor I recall,” you said.

“Mhm. I recall that going a tad different,” he hummed, flipping something over in the pan. “Go on and take Jensen to the dining room. Dinner will be out in a few minutes.”

“It’s a little funny,” said Jensen as you headed out with him around the corner, finding a seat for him in there. “Seeing you not at work I mean. You’re always so in charge there. With your family you’re a lot more laid back.”

“If I’m being honest, it makes me horribly uncomfortable to be in charge like that,” you said.

“Why do it then?” he asked.

“Sometimes you have to do scary things for stuff you care about. They wanted to shred my book apart and make it a summer blockbuster,” you said. “They wanted to make Hale the bad guy at the end if you can believe it.”

“It would have ruined it,” said Jensen with a scoff. “What idiot came up with that? It’s so stupid. It would have made everything pointless.”

“I know. I fought to be director to save it and I won. Now I hope I don’t ruin it,” you said.

“You’ll be great,” said Jensen as he pulled out your chair for you. You sat down with a smile, Jensen taking the one across from you. “I promise.”

“Dinner was delicious,” said Jensen as he headed out a few hours later. “Thank you for having me over.”

“We’ll do it again sometime,” said your dad as your mom handed him his coat. “A home cooked meal is good now and then. I know your family isn’t around here. Stop over every once in a while. Dani knows how to cook a mean prime rib.”

“I may take you up on that,” said Jensen as he pulled on his jacket.

“Well and the kids adored you which they rarely do with their father’s guests. We’d much rather have you over than Gil Nicholas. He’s such a little douchebag,” said your mom. You smirked, Jensen chuckling.

“I’ve heard the rumors,” said Jensen. “Next time I’ll be sure to bring a dish over. My mom always said don’t come empty handed to a dinner party.”

“Your mother taught you very good manners,” said your mom. 

“Sure you don’t want to stick around for another drink?” asked your dad.

“I would but I have to drive,” said Jensen. “I appreciate the offer though. Another time for sure.”

“I understand. Well have a good rest of your weekend, Jensen. Try to take a little time to relax. We got another long week ahead of us,” said your dad.

“I think I’m going to head home too, try to catch up on sleep,” you said.

“Alright. You young guns go home. Y/N, text us when you get there,” he said. 

“Mhm. Night,” you said, heading outside, walking with Jensen down the front steps. “Hey, hold up a second.”

“Yes?” he asked, following you to your car. You opened the passenger seat and pulled out a small bag, handing it over to him. He tilted his head as he opened it up, smiling wide as he reached inside and pulled out his gift. “A first edition copy of The Dark Woods. I love it. You didn’t have to do that Y/N.”

“I even signed it for you,” you said, Jensen flipping open the front cover and glancing at you. 

“Did you just ask me out through a book?” he asked.

“Did it work?” you asked, Jensen smirking. “You had a point yesterday. I don’t think anyone is ever ready for a relationship or the timing is right. But I like you and you’re sweet and I haven’t liked anyone in years.”

“Do you want to go grab some dessert?” he asked with a big smile. 

“Is this a date?”

“Maybe,” he teased.

“Oh, well if you’re gonna tease, I can do that too,” you said, turning back into the car and pulling out another bag. He stared at it before he tore into it, wide eyed and looking over at you. 

“The Dark Night. A Lyle Sullivan story,” he said, staring at the plain black covered book. “What-”

“It’s the second book. That’s an unpublished copy of the first edition. Only about ten people have read it so far but I figured you might really enjoy it,” you said.

“This is literally the coolest gift I have ever gotten,” he said, looking the book over, already flipping through it.

“Okay, fanboy. Let’s grab some dessert and then you can spend all day tomorrow nose deep in that thing,” you said.

“Tomorrow? I’m staying up and reading this tonight!” he said with a laugh. “This is awesome. I can’t wait to check it out. After dessert of course.”

“After you, Ackles.”

______

A/N: Read Part 6 here!

#supernatural #spn #jensen x reader #jensen ackles #supernatural series #supernatural reader insert #jensen ackles x reader #spn reader insert #jensen reader insert #jensen x #jensen ackles x you

[hwauas]

🎭: "belladonna"

jung wooyoung | 정오영 - 2,086 words

you couldn't believe this day came. the adrenaline was rushing through your veins. Wooyoung, the Jeong Wooyoung, coming over tonight. you spend the day preparing your house, cooking the dinner, and of course getting ready. you needed everything to be ready, and to be perfect.

     the table was ready. some flowers in a vase. two plates, two cutlery sets, and two glasses for water. you dispatched few pearls on the white tablecloth. you created a soft atmosphere thanks to candles on the table, and little lamps in the rooms. you made sure all your apartment was cleaned. everything needed to be at its place.

it looked like you were having your boyfriend over. but Wooyoung wasn't your boyfriend. and would never be your boyfriend. who would like to date someone like him? it was just a formal dinner between you both.

     of course, over the year, you learnt to stop having pity for wrong people. your work forced you to build your heart into a heart of stone. people were bad. and you couldn't do anything for them. it was the path they choose, and so they chose the consequences. they were aware few people — or nobody — would appreciate them. and these person would slowly turn themselves into agressive and antisocial, becoming lonely, so lonely. this is how it works.

Wooyoung was one of them. he was searched by a lot of mafia gangs. sometimes for little crimes: swearing, assaulting, or for some debts. but also for big crimes: stealing important informations from these gangs, spying on them.

among these mafias looking after him, the popular S-SK band of mafias. according to rumors, S-SK was for Seoul-South Korea. yet, any informations ever leaked before about that or something else.

     anyways, Wooyoung was clearly involved into the dark side of the city, and even S-SK was chasing him. you were doubting about something or someone saving him. he was in too big troubles.

     tic. toc. tic. toc.

     the clock announced 8pm, and quickly after, the doorbell announced someone was here. Wooyoung, of course.

you didn't really like the fact you were having someone's like him over. but you had to do it for your boss. it was just an evening. just a moment, before getting rid of him.

     “y/n. thank you for receiving me.”

Wooyoung entered your apartment and removed his shoes.

“i was surprised when i was told to come here instead. weren't we supposed to meat at your boss's place?”

     “yeah, that's right. but there is a hold-up. he asked me if i was okay with seeing you without him and i just couldn't cancel this dinner less than twenty-four hours before. i hope you don't mind?”

     “not at all. i appreciate you didn't cancel. i'd have get mad. thank you.”

     you faked a smile, and asked him to follow you to your living room. you made him sit on your sofa. and after giving your dear Wooyoung something to drink, you sat besides him, on the sofa.

     “so. about this deal. what is it?”

Wooyoung asked as he sipped on the whiskey you gave him.

     “oh come on. we have so much time to talk about this. don't be this formal.”

Wooyoung only sighed and sank into your sofa.

“when did it all started?”

     “start what?”

by his behaviour and the tone of his voice, you recognise a nonchalance. he was annoyed — you cut him to the quick.

     “being... bad. stealing, spying on, having debts on purpose. all that.”

you had a serious gaze on him. you knew you needed to have a control on yourself not to help him — anyways he was a lost cause. you just needed to stall for time.

     “i don't remember when exactly. i was just... young. it started with little things. and i was failure to my parents. they never encourage me to do something. the only one that believed in me left. since i've never been a fan of school, i never did anything by myself to study, to work or anything. you know.. just people here and there got me into this. and i'm not complaining. i have somewhere to sleep. something to eat everyday. somewhere to take showers. clothes. it's enough i guess.”

he was avoiding your gaze, looking straight in front of him. there was the turned off TV.

     “who left? who was he, or she?”

you were curious about what he just told you. it was very intriguing: you needed to know more about this for your own pleasure.

     “San. a friend. my best friend.”

Wooyoung sipped on his whiskey again, and so you did on yours. you didn't really know what to say.

“but you don't need to know much about him, right? so leave him alone.”

     with that, Wooyoung finished his glass of alcohol in one gulp. you understood what does this mean: you couldn't ask anything about this San anymore. you then stood up and went to the kitchen. Wooyoung wandered around to find the dining room, and sat on a chair in front of a plate. the atmosphere got him less tensed, and you immediately knew you did good.

    you came back with the dish, and served you both. it was steaming, yet once you came back from the kitchen to put back the dish there, you both started to eat.

     “so i was saying, about-”

     “about the deal. i know. this is what you're waiting impatiently since you arrived here, Wooyoung. okay. then let's discuss about this.”

you didn't say anything, wanting him to go first. after all, he was the one obsessed with that. right?

     “so, since this agency is holding files we are both interested in, but since their security is very strong, i thought about infiltrating someone in there. we can pretext it's for an internship, for few days. but then, the person there has to be very cautious.”

Wooyoung didn't say more after, and continued to eat. it seemed he was liking what you've done.

     you waited longer, hoping him to continue — which he didn't. you then frowned, and stopped eating for a moment.

“what for?”

     “the security. all the parts in the building are well secured.”

he rolled his eyes, as if you asked the dumbest question ever. but you were too focused on his lips to notice this. Wooyoung was eating everything. and this fulfilled your heart with joy and happiness.

“do you think somebody will make it through the whole security system to steal the files?”

     ”of course.~”

     you kept in mind all the informations he gave you until now, eating your plate till it was empty. you were thinking again and again about what he told you. you had to remember everything. every single details. but you wanted to stare at your victory too.

     “i'm getting thirsty. can i have some.. water.. please?”

Wooyoung's voice was very low. every words seemed hard to say.

     “of course, Wooyoung.”

you sat up and went to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water from your fridge — one you prepared on purpose for him before, meticulously. you came back, and opened the bottle to pour it in his glass.

“by any chance, you don't have any information about the security? where are cameras? where are stocked the videos? where is their room to look through these cameras? any motion detector, or metal detector?”

     Wooyoung tried to drink, but he couldn't swallow more than three times. he gave up for the moment, and just focused back on you.

“i do. it's in my phone. but as long as i'm not sure we're both into this, i won't show anything.”

his voice got raspy, and he ended up almost whispering. you faked a reaction, worrying about him.

     “are you okay? you wanna lay down maybe..?”

you asked with fake worried eyes. but deep down, you were happy. everything was working. everything was going well.

     Wooyoung nodded. he took a deep breath as he was trying hard to keep his head up. his pale skin under his dark clothes started to shine: he was sweating. drops here and there were forming, rolling, and disappeared somewhere on his clothes.

     you stood up and went by his side. you tried to get him back on his feet, and almost pulled him through the rooms to lay him down on your sofa — but you knew this position wouldn't help at all. you made sure he was comfortable in your sofa, and left to clean the table. once you were in the kitchen, far from him, you couldn't help but squeal in happiness.

     “y/n: 1. Wooyoung: 0.”

you whispered to yourself, all happy about what you achieved. you were cruel, but you were loving this part of you — even though it already scared you in the past.

     “oh please don't scream like that! my head! it hurts even more!”

Wooyoung tried to shout out, but it hurt him even more than the squeal you did. since you knew what happening to him, you knew this noise you made have been altered: the sound seemed closer, stronger, and higher.

     “i'm sorry.”

once again, you used your talents to fake your emotions. worry, and guilty about your squeal. you put down the bottle of water and the glass on the coffee table.

“i'll get you some medicines. and a wet towel. wait for me.”

     you rushed through your apartment to get these. once you were in your bathroom, the door closed, you took out your phone to call your boss. of course, you tried to stay as discreet as possible. you even put a random towel in the washbasin and turned on the tap to pretend you were indeed moistening the fabric for him.

     “about time! i thought you would never call me!”

     “i'm sorry boss. it got a little bit longer. but everything's fine. he ate everything. and i managed to gave him water too. and of course, i watered the poison down in this water too.”

you said with shining eyes. you were proud of yourself. it was an another mission you accomplished.

     “okay but the way you're getting rid of him, i don't give a fuck, Belladonna. i wanna know about the informations you've got from him.”

     you tried to sum up all the informations your boss needed. anyways, you would meet him to tell him everything in details.

and you smiled as your boss again complimented your work.

     “i knew you wouldn't disappoint me. you're not the best S-SK member for no reason.”

     you finally hang up with him quickly after. looking at your reflection in the mirror, you offered yourself a smirk. you made sure to arrange your top, making sure to reveal a tattoo on your collarbone. the words 'S-SK : Belladonna' were written here, under your skin.

you were a member of this mafia band. Belladonna was your code name, and somewhat your new identity since you chose this path.

even though you did horrible things, you would never ever give up on  S-SK.

     you took the towel, and barely wrung it. you came back by Wooyoung, slowly dying in your sofa. and the first thing he noticed what your tattoo. the fear slowly appeared in his eyes, and all over his face.

     “S-SK..? Belladonna..? i trusted you..! how could you..!”

Wooyoung tried to do something, but he was too weak. even screaming was hurting him even more.

     “shhh, honey... the poison is taking the leads. give up. you have no chance.”

    “the.. poison..?”

     “the belladonna, honey. why do you think my code name is Belladonna? because i kill with the belladonna, of course.”

you put the towel on his forehead. it would change nothing. of course.

“belladonna, a flower. isn't it paradoxical that a flower.. so precious, so delicate, so beautiful.. can kill a human? i look harmless. but i kill. just as you, i'm a bad person, Wooyoung. you're not the only mafiosi here, honey.”

    as Wooyoung finally gave up, you took his phone from his pocket. you left your apartment, locking him up in there. anyways, as he was dying, he couldn't do anything.

you texted two S-SK members to ask them to get rid of the corpse for you. and of course, your boss and you would use Wooyoung's information without any misgivings.

     in this life, the strongest makes the rules.

it's killing.. or being killed. and guilty or sorrow weren't feelings anymore for you. a S-SK mafia.

#ateez #atiny #hongjoong #kim hongjoong #seonghwa #park seonghwa #yunho #jeong yunho #yeosang #kang yeosang #san #choi san #mingi #song mingi #wooyoung #jeong wooyoung #wooyoung angst #wooyoung x reader #jongho #choi jongho #ateez imagines #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #ateez angst #mafia au

[jamielea81]

When We Were Young

Chapter 2

Description: Leaving the only home your daughter had ever known wasn’t part of the grand plan. But then again, sometimes taking chances can change your whole life. And you should know that, you’ve been doing that since the start.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: Angst. A curse word or two.

Word Count: 2,700

A/N: Thank you for the wonderful response to the first chapter! Hope you enjoy this added twist. As always, this is strictly for fun and I mean no harm. Please let me know your thoughts as I love to read them. Likes and reblogs give me life.

Catch up with Chapter One

**

“I’m your..” Chris shook his head and looked at the assistant in the room and then at the photographer. “Jodes, I need a minute.”

Chris didn’t wait for a response, instead he slid his arm from around Ellie’s waist to grab her hand, pulling her to the far end of the room.

“What’s your name?” he asked.

“Ellington. Ellie for short,” she said, playing with her hair. “Look, I don’t want anything. Just wanted to see you in person,” she said softly, her nerves coming back to her.

“Why do you think I’m your father? You have to understand, this isn’t the first time someone has said those same words to me.”

Ellie bit her lip and nodded. “NYC Cryobank and Family Planning.”

“Fuck,” Chris swore softly, ducking his head. “How old are you are you anyway?”

“Fifteen.”

“It’s not possible,” Chris said shaking his head. “I was eighteen when I donated.” He licked his lips and patted his pocket for his phone.

“I’m pretty sure it doesn’t expire like milk,” she replied, Chris giving her a weak smile.

Ellie played with her fingers, not knowing what else to say. The whole speech she played over and over in her head was suddenly forgotten. Reaching into her jeans pocket, she pulled out a folded piece of notebook paper and stretched out her hand for him to take it.

“It’s my mom’s number. Figured it would be weird for you to call a minor.” Chris took it and shoved it into his back pocket. “Not that you have to call!” she added quickly. “I just wanted you to know that I exist. And we’re great. My mom and me, I mean. I’ve had a great life and wanted to see the person that made it possible for me to exist. Just don’t call tonight. She doesn’t know I’m here. If you decide to call, I mean.”

They looked at each other. Ellie trying to memorize his face. Chris trying to find himself in her eyes and smile.

“It was nice to meet you Ellie,” Chris said, a closed lip smile on his face, finality in his voice.

“Ye-yeah. You too,” she said, dropping her head and walking out the room. She wanted her mom and she wanted her now. This was a mistake and it was taking everything in her not to cry.

Ellie made it to the nearest restroom, walking past a line of girls that were washing their hands or fixing their makeup. She pushed into the stall at the end of the row, locked the door and sat down on the seat. She grabbed a large wad of toilet paper from the dispenser, flushed the toilet, and placed the paper over her mouth. The tears and her sobs started to flow. She hoped that both the sound of the toilet and the paper would muffle her cries.

**

It had been three hours since you received the call from the academy about your daughter missing class. Three long hours of not knowing where she was. Not knowing if she were safe. Gwen had done her best to calm you down as she usually did, but your mind was still reeling. The troubling thing is there is nothing you could do but wait.

The house was mostly unpacked except for your books that were going to be placed in the small bookcase in the living room and your office which you had not utilized in the nearly three weeks that you lived in Belmont. You couldn’t really call it an office per se, it was nook off the formal dining room that wouldn’t be used. Ellie and you were plate on your lap on the couch or out on the deck kind of people. You had a dining room table, but it was mostly a place for Ellie to spread out her school assignments and for the occasional crafting you did.

With your books all unpacked, the dining room table dusted, and the office looking it bit more like an office, you collapsed on your couch. Feet up, blouse off save for your cami, you were done with this day. Once she got home and knew she was safe, you were going to bed. You’d have to dream up a punishment. Ellie hardly got in to trouble. She occasionally mouthed off like teenagers did, but this was uncharted territory for you.

You heard the door open and you were immediately on your feet, rushing down the stairs to the entry way. Her face was puffy and red and you knew immediately something was wrong.

“Mama…” she started, having a hard time catching her breath. “I’m…so…sorry.”

You wrapped your arms around her as she started to sob on your chest. “Shhh. I got you,” you said softly.

When she started to settle down you urged her to follow you up the stairs. “Why don’t you take a hot bath and I’ll get your jammies ready and then we’ll talk?” Ellie nodded her head slowly. “You can use my tub. I’ve got the good bath stuff anyway,” you said, sending her a wink.

“Thank you,” she said with teary eyes. “I love you.”

“Love you too baby.”

Whatever happened was big and you hoped she would be honest with you.

**

A frozen pizza was currently baking in the oven. Tonight, was not the night for a home cooked meal as you were still too worked up as was Ellie. You had changed into pajamas as well despite it only being six in the evening.

Ellie was sitting on one end of the couch with her body turned to face you, her knees pressed against her chest. You sat on the other end facing her, one leg tucked under the other.

“I haven’t been truthful with you,” she started. “About a year ago, I found some information out.”

“What kind of information, Ellie?” This was sounding way too ominous for your liking.

“Christian. You remember Christian?” she asked, eyebrows raised.

“From third and fourth grade soccer when you played on that co-ed team?”

She nodded her head. “Christian’s really good with a computer. I’m pretty sure he’ll be working for the FBI one day. He uh, he was able to do some digging for me.”

“What in the world would he need to dig up for you?”

“He was looking into the donation center you used. I asked him to try to find out information about the donor you picked.”

“Ellington Rae,” you breathed out.

“I’m sorry mom. I just really wanted to know.” Her eyes started to well up with tears again.

You nodded your head and gestured with your hand for her to continue.

“Well, he found your case number and was able to find the donor number. He eventually found the name assigned to the donor number.”

You let out a slow breath, pinching the bridge of your nose.

“I went to see him today. He lives here in Boston. At least he does most of the time.”

“Ellie!” you shouted. “That’s not only dangerous but an evasion of privacy. We don’t know this person. He could be a bad guy. He could have a family of his own now.”

She was full on crying again and your heart was stuck between being angry and wanting to soothe your child. Of course, you pulled her to you, wrapping her in a hug again.

She pulled back, letting her hands fall into your lap. You grabbed on to both of her with yours.

“Are you okay?” You shook your head. “Of course, you’re not.”

“There’s something else,” she said.

“Do I wanna know?”

She licked her lips. “He’s Chris Evans. The actor.”

Well, shit.

“I don’t even know what to say to that.”

“I just wanted to see him mom. Not on the movie screen or in pictures online. I just had to see his face in person. Just once. I wanted to see if he smiled like me. Or see if his eyebrows shoot up like mine do when I laugh.”

You nodded your head numbly. Even though you barely talked to your own father, you understood the need to know.

“That’s where I went today. There’s a comic convention downtown and he was appearing today. I bought a ticket to get my picture taken with him. He’s only there today, so that’s why I skipped school.”

You released her hands, standing to your feet, and started to pace. “Was this whole move a lie Ellie? Are we here so you could meet this man?”

She covered her face with her hands but didn’t answer.

“Did we only move to Boston so you could meet your biological father?” you asked sternly.

“S’not the only reason. I’m so sorry mom. I wanted us to move here for Harvard, but I could have found another engineering high school closer to home.”

You shook your head. It was your turn to cry. The two of you had a very honest relationship and made decisions together. The trust was broken and you weren’t sure if it could be repaired anytime soon.

The closeness you and Ellie shared is why she knew from the time she was eight years old that she didn’t have a dad like other kids did. You were open and honest with her about the decision you made at twenty one. The two of you have talked about it several times through the years.

When she was twelve, she questioned whether you had gotten pregnant to escape your parents. You explained to her that wasn’t the reason. You had wanted to be mom. Had known that’s what you wanted more than anything.

You weren’t in a serious relationship and didn’t want a random hook up to father your child. You had friends you could have asked, but thought that would complicate things as those friends settled down with spouses of their own. You had just graduated from college and were spending four additional months in New York before your lease ran out. Your parents had expected you to come home to Kentucky and you had planned on doing so. You had money, more than enough. Not only did your parents send you a more than generous allowance every month for four years, you also had a large sum of money your grandma Ellie had left you that became yours when you turned twenty one. Her only request was to do something for you with it.

Researching and planning was what you were good at. Apparently, those skills came in handy when finding a donation and family planning center. Two consultations and an appointment later, you had a positive pregnancy test sitting on your bathroom vanity. After two months, you called your mother to tell her. To say that conversation went poorly was an understatement. You were throwing your life away according to her. She didn’t know Ellie was the result of a sperm donor. To this day, only Ellie and couple of close friends knew. Your mother and father figured you had been with a deadbeat guy who chose not to stick around. You were essentially told not to come home.

New York City wasn’t a place you wanted to raise a child. You had loved the city all through college, but rent was expensive and buying would be out of the question. You wanted some place that had that small-town feel. Somewhere a little quieter. When your classmate Peter offered you a place to stay in his home-town of Wilmington, you took him up on the offer. Living with Peter and his brother Caleb was a bit of a change for you. You often found yourself cleaning up after the two of them. It didn’t last long as you found employment with an employer that wasn’t discouraged by your six-month pregnant belly. You found a two-bedroom apartment shortly after, decorating the nursery in neutral colors because you wanted to be surprised.

Ellington Rae Y/L/N was born in the early hours of April sixth. Named affectionately after your grandmother. Your favorite person in the world, second now that you had your little Ellie. She came out screaming and never stopped. She was a fussy baby and you found yourself in tears almost as much as she were. But she was your everything and still is. Your parents came to visit when she was three months old. They visited yearly, often bringing gifts that a child did not need nor want. When she turned five, they sent money once a year for her birthday. The money went into an account for Ellie’s schooling and when she expressed dreams of Harvard, you were glad you did.

When she was three years old, you moved out of that small two-bedroom apartment into your bungalow near the beach and that’s where the two of you stayed. Friends became family and you were both happy. But now everything seemed to be a mess.

“It’s going to take time, Ellie. My trust has been broken but I’m mostly hurt that you couldn’t come to me about this. We should have talked about this. We could have come up with a plan together.”

You sit back down on the couch and pull her back to you. She’s still your baby even though she’s as tall as you.

“You’re right and I’m sorry. It was a mistake,” she said, shaking her head. “I gave him your number. You know. In case he wanted to call. Wanted to know me.”

She sounds so damn broken and you’re feeling broken over it.

“Okay, baby. If he calls, we’ll take it one step at a time. But if he doesn’t, it’s his damn loss because you are the best thing I have ever known in this world and that will never change.”

**

Two weeks had passed and Chris hadn’t called. Ellie didn’t talk about it, but you knew it affected her. Being rejected by anyone hurt. You couldn’t blame Chris entirely though. Him choosing to donate all those years ago was his choice. It was supposed to be an anonymous one. Now he knew he brought a life into this world. Accepting that had to be hard for anyone. Accepting that and being a public person was probably harder.

Punishing Ellie was harder on your than it was on her. She’s the new kid in town and at that age where life long friendships are formed, you didn’t want to exclude her from hanging out with her friends. So, you limited it to only weekends. She had to check in with you on where she was or if she went to a different location than what was planned. She was also in charge of dishes and taking out the trash. Her biggest punishment of all was knowing you lost a lot of trust in her.

**

Your phone rang only to stop ringing after two rings. You were in the kitchen, putting away this week’s groceries so you hadn’t been able to reach it. Taking a quick glance, you didn’t recognize the number. Figuring they realized their mis-dial, you went back to deciding which meat to leave thawed in the refrigerator and which to freeze. Exciting times.

It started to ring again. You turned away from the freezer to stare at the device sitting on the kitchen island. That same number appeared on the display. As the second ring rang out, you dared it to continue a third time. It did. You grabbed it with one hand, clicking the accept button with your other.

“Hello,” you answered.

“H-hi. This is Chris. I uh. This is Chris Evans.”

**

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#Chris Evans #Chris Evans x reader #chris evans reader insert #When We Were Young #chris evans imagine #chris evans x you #chris evans x y/n #chris evans x single!mother reader #cevans #rpf

[leigh-kelly]

The Nanny-Chapter 2

Defeated by her inability to sell any makeup, and her total failure at faking her way into a job as a nanny, Brittany returns to her parents’ apartment in Flushing. Her mother is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and she feels exactly twelve years old as she sinks down onto the couch. This definitely isn’t where she saw herself at nearly thirty, and when she looks at her phone to see text messages from Sugar complaining about working with Quinn, she just throws it to the side. Her life is in total shambles, and all she needs is some dose of good luck to turn it around.

“Ma, what am I supposed to do? I dropped out of college to work in Dani’s stupid bridal shop, I have no real skills, no girlfriend, and I’m living with my mother.”

“It’s no picnic living with you either, kid.” Whitney Piece opens the doorway between the kitchen and the living room and holds a raw chicken in her hands. “You’re really butting in on mine and your father’s private time.”

“Ew, Mom, gross. I don’t need to hear about that. I’m having enough of a terrible day.”

“I say you march back down to that Ms. Lopez’s mansion and give her a piece of your mind.”

“What’s that even going to do? She didn’t do anything to me. If I’m going to give anyone a piece of my mind, it’s going to be Dani Fucking Harper for cheating on me and firing me. She’s the one that got me into this situation.”

“You’re the one that got yourself into this situation. I warned you about Dani when you started dating her. You wouldn’t let me look you up with Jeannie’s nice son Artie who would have married you and made you a millionaire. A millionaire, you hear me? He just sold his first tech company for five-hundred million dollars. But instead, you chose Dani with the bridal shop.”

“Why do you have to make everything worse? I went on a date with Artie, and he so wasn’t into reenacting my Lady and the Tramp fantasy and kept talking to me like he was some kind of rapper. It’s not like I expected Dani to cheat on me.”

“She was shifty, I would have expected it.”

“Gee, thanks Mom.” Brittany rolls her eyes, and then, from where it landed under the couch when she tossed it, Brittany’s phone begins to ring. She stoops down to pick it up, and she furrows her brow when she sees a strange 212 area code light up the screen. “I guess I should take this, it’s probably someone calling to tell me that I have to sell my kidneys in order to survive the next month.”

“Only sell one, or else you’ll die, and your father and I will be responsible for paying back that ten thousand dollars in student loans you took out.”

“You’re just full of hope today, aren’t you?” Brittany sighs and presses the accept call button on her phone. “Hello?”

“Hello, is this Miss Pierce?”

“Um, yeah, who’s this?”

“Santana Lopez, we met earlier.”

“Right, how could I forget the gorgeous millionaire with the big mansion?”

“Gorgeous millionaire, I’m listening.” Whitney sits down next to Brittany, and she shoos her away.

“I’ve reconsidered what I said earlier. You seemed to have a way with Tyler, and I’d like to hire you on a trial basis, assuming you can move in today and start immediately.”

“Move in? It’s a live-in position?”

“Well yes, is that going to be a problem?”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can pack my bags. Oh, thank you, Ms. Lopez, thank you! You won’t regret this.”

“I have some reason to believe that I will…but I’ll see you this afternoon.”

In less than an hour, Brittany packs up everything she owns and is in the back of a cab headed toward Manhattan. She thinks she probably should be nervous, but she’s not, she’s totally got this and she’s going to show Ms. Lopez that she’s totally wrong about thinking she’s going to regret hiring her. Kids absolutely love her, she’s sure that she’ll win over Tyler with his fake blood, Abigail with her whining and Valerie with her sad eyes. It’s going to be a total piece of cake, she just knows it.

“Miss Pierce.” The butler opens the door when she gets there and hurries out to the cab to go help her with her things. Most of the stuff in the apartment she shared with Dani wasn’t hers, so she really just has four suitcases chock full of clothes and a big Rubbermaid bin full of shoes.

Brittany looks around the house and it’s surprisingly quiet. Something about it reminds her of The Sound of Music, her absolute favorite comfort movie when she was a kid, and she eyes the drapes, hoping she doesn’t have to teach herself how to sew in order to make the kids play clothes. Shaking her head, she moves over to the side table and reaches out to touch what is probably a very expensive crystal vase when she hears footsteps and then retracts her hand.

“I’d appreciate if you didn’t touch the antiques.” Santana puts her hand on her hip and cocks her head to the side. “And I expect I won’t have to watch over you while you’re watching the children.”

“Why do you have antiques in a house full of kids anyway?”

“We taught them from a young age what was theirs to touch and what wasn’t. I’ve never had a problem before.”

“Even with Tyler?”

“Well—” Santana begins and then is stopped by the sound of screeching coming into the room.

“Mommy! Look at my dolly! Tyler ripped her head right off and put it in the toilet bowl!” Abigail cried.

“I did not!” Tyler tumbles into the room. “She’s a big fat liar. She did it herself just to get me in trouble.”

“A new doll for Abigail will be coming right out of your allowance, young man.” Santana furrows her brow and looks between the children. “Both of you, say hello to Miss Pierce.”

“Miss Pierce? No way, I’m just Brittany.”

“I’d prefer if the children called you Miss Pierce.”

“And I’d prefer if they called me Brittany.” Brittany challenges. “Listen, Abigail, I’m an expert doll fixer. Why don’t you come upstairs with me and we’ll get her all taken care of?”

An hour later, Abigail’s doll is fixed, Tyler is distracted with a new bucket of Legos that Kurt—the butler, now that Brittany has learned his name—brought out and Brittany is almost finished unpacking. She’s not sure where Valerie is, though she thinks she should probably be aware of that, and she wonders exactly how one nannies a fifteen-year-old. It’s not like she needs dolls fixed or lessons in not using ketchup as fake blood, but Brittany is sure she’ll learn on the job.

“Miss Pierce.” Kurt knocks on the door to her bedroom and Brittany cringes a little at everyone in this house and their formalities. “Dinner is served.”

Brittany makes her way down the stairs and into the dining room, but when she gets there, she realizes that there are only four places set. She wrinkles her nose a little and looks to Kurt, who is puzzled by her expression. He holds out his hand toward the kitchen, apparently assuming that’s where she’ll eat and Brittany’s eyebrows raise.

“The nanny normally eats in there on her own while Ms. Lopez has meals with the children.”

“Well that’s ridiculous.” Brittany goes into the kitchen and picks up the plate set for her, carrying into the dining room. “Isn’t a nanny supposed to be part of the family? I’ll be eating with them.”

Valerie comes into the dining room first and gives Brittany the same strange look that Kurt did. Brittany is in utter shock that any other nanny put up with this and she simply unfolds her napkin and puts it on her lap like she’s seen people do in movies. At home, she mostly used paper towels as napkins and can’t really understand why anyone would think cloth napkins were a better idea, but she guesses she may as well learn how to fit in with these rich people.

“You know you’re supposed to eat in the kitchen.” Valerie tells her, standing behind her own chair.

“Maybe that’s how it used to be, but if I’m going to spend all my time with you, I think I should at least be able to eat with you.”

“Miss Pierce.” Santana comes in, followed by Abigail and Tyler. “You’re—”

“Supposed to eat in the kitchen, I know. I—” Brittany tries to think of the most appropriate response to her new boss. “I think it’s better for the kids to see me eating with the family, then they know they should respect me.”

“Well. Alright then.” Santana sits down.

Dinner is the weirdest thing Brittany has ever experienced. Not a single one of them talk. She keeps trying to start a conversation, get everyone to at least pretend they’re at the table with other people, but no one takes the bait. She watches Tyler hide his broccoli in his napkin, watches Abigail obsessively sort her food, watches Valerie eat more slowly than she’s ever seen a human being eat and watches Santana look down at her phone every thirty seconds. Then, just when she feels like she’s about to explode, Rachel Berry barges into the dining room with a flourish.

“I just got off the phone with Brody Weston, he wants to have dinner with us tonight.” She shrieks. “This could be our chance to land Broadway’s biggest star. Lin Manuel Miranda doesn’t stand a chance against us if we get him!”

“Let’s go.” Santana stands up, pushing her plate away. “Miss Pierce, I expect you’ll be alright getting the children to bed?”

“You’ve got it. What, like ten o’clock?”

“No. More like eight o’clock. Valerie can stay up until nine-thirty.”

“Right…” Brittany shakes her head, thinking maybe Valerie is way too old to have a nine-thirty bedtime, but she’s not going to argue with her boss. “Uh, have fun.”

“Miss Pierce.” Rachel’s voice gets high and shrill. “We are not doing this for fun.”

They leave the dining room and Brittany looks around at the three kids. Abigail looks crestfallen, Tyler looks like he’s planning something and Valerie just looks completely aloof to the entire situation. Maybe it’s weird, but Brittany wants to know more about Ms. Lopez. She’s living in her house after all and if feels weird that they’ve exchanged maybe one-hundred words. But she’s not exactly about to ask, the woman was weird enough about her sitting at the dinner table with them and even weirder about the kids calling her Brittany, so she thinks if she actually asks something personal her head will explode.

“So…what’s up guys?” Brittany asks. “You know there’s no law that you have to be quiet at the dinner table, right?”

“Mom would rather we are.” Abigail pipes up. “She’s usually really busy doing work on her phone.”

“Well guess what, she’s not here, so talk away.”

Brittany isn’t surprised that she’s still met with utter silence, but she rolls her eyes a little. It’s clear that these kids have no idea how to just be kids and she thinks of The Sound of Music again. Maybe she does need to learn how to saw so she can make them play clothes out of the curtains, bring them to Central Park and let them run around and scream. It seems like it would do each of them good, probably Tyler, especially, since he seems to need to get into mischief to actually express himself.

After dinner is done, all three kids go to their rooms. Brittany is pretty sure that she hears Valerie’s door slam, but she can’t be sure. Figuring this is just what they do, Brittany goes into the kitchen to try and get some dirt out of Kurt. She could see a gleam in his eye when she met him earlier in the day and she just knows he’ll be willing to spill some gossip.

“So, what’s the deal Kurt? Tell me all about these people.”

“Miss Pierce—”

“Okay, let’s just put an end to that right now. Brittany, okay?”

“Brittany. Fine. But seriously, you’ve been here like three hours and you already want me to gossip?”

“I know you live for it.” Brittany laughs a little. “So, tell me everything there is to know about Ms. Lopez.”

“You got me.” Kurt rolls his eyes at himself. “Thank God I finally have someone to talk to, I wait all month for my butler’s association meetings to just gab about everything.”

“I knew it! So, what’s her deal?”

“She’s trying to be this big-time producer, she’s like, insanely jealous of Lin Manuel Miranda, you can’t even bring him up around her, she’ll go absolutely apeshit.”

“But Ms. Berry—”

“Yeah, she does it all the time, I think she thinks it motivates her, which, honestly, it probably does. But basically, they’re always having these investors fall through every time they think they’re going to have this big hit. They passed on Dear Evan Hansen, so, there’s that.”

“And Ms. Berry? Are they like…together?”

“Oh my God, disgusting.” Kurt feigns a gag. “But actually, Ms. Berry wishes. She follows Ms. Lopez around like a little puppy dog and is basically ready to throw herself in her arms at any given second. It’s so gross to watch, but it’s like a car wreck, I can’t look away.”

“And what about the kids’ dad?”

“Mama, actually. Do you have like no gaydar? I could sense you were one of us from a mile away.”

“Hey…I’m bi.” Brittany crosses her arms over her chest.

“Still one of us. And she died two years ago, she was hit by a car and it destroyed Ms. Lopez. Miss Abigail was only three, she doesn’t remember her at all and Mr. Tyler was four so he has a few memories. Miss Valerie is still angry.”

“I can see that. She has barely said two words to me.”

“She doesn’t want to get attached, you don’t even know how many nannies we’ve gone through around here.”

“So why did Ms. Lopez decide to hire me anyway?”

“Desperation?” Kurt chuckles. “And also, I may have planted the seed in her head.”

“Why?”

“Because you looked like a kicked puppy when you showed up here. So now that I’ve told you about her, what’s your deal.”

“I mean, I got dumped and fired on the same day…by the same person, so that’s pretty much how I ended up here. The only thing I know about kids is from hanging out with my little cousins, my mom is desperate for me to get married, that’s about it.”

“Hmm.” Kurt looks off into the distance and Brittany furrows her brow.

“What?”

“Huh? No, nothing, I was just thinking about something.”

“C’mon, you have to tell me!”

“You’ll find out in due time, I just know it.”

#the nanny #brittana

[gyllenhaalstories]

imagine taking rapper jake home to meet your parents.

i’m so sorry for the delay, anon! <3 buckle up, it got long and i’m emo!!!!! lil jakey jakes meeting your parents was not something i thought i’d cry about right now but here i am. i listened to nothing’s gonna hurt you baby by cigarettes after sex if you want to vibe with me!

<3

jake swore he was about to shit his pants when you reminded him of the dinner with your parents.

he ran all over his house, searching for nothing and everything at oncel. one second it was his tie, the next his phone and after that his keys. he was just so terrified. he wanted to leave a good impression.

he dressed up like he was going to the oscars. he put on a suit, a new one he got tailored to his body just for the occasion. he covered all of his tattoos, with those long sleeves. he hid his chain under the color of the shirt you buttoned lovingly. he went to the barbershop too, he got a fresh cut and his beard neat. he looked like a movie star and even if this was not the man with whom you fell in love, you still loved this new persona.

“you’re so stressed that i’m stressed” you’d scream at him while he paced around the bedroom as you put on a simple outfit, some jeans and a button up shirt too. dresses felt too formal. it was your parents, not the pope. “we’re not going. i’m calling them and i’ll say i’m sick”.

jake stopped moving and protested. “if i wanna ask your father for your hand, i better know how he looks like first. if he likes golf, i’m out”.

the joke was unexpected, but it made both of you laugh. he kept bringing up marriage. it was like a running gag, but it felt more and more real. one day you would be called mrs gyllenhaal. and this day would not happen if you died from a heart attack because you couldn’t face the judgement of your parents.

so jake waited for you in the car. he picked a black jaguar, he didn’t want to be too obnoxious. he had the head lights shining bright and blinked them so you pretended to walk like a model and twirl in front of the car before you sat on the passenger seat. “so fuckin’ gorgeous.” jake said and noticed you, too, wore the chain he got you for your birthday. he stretched his arm out to play with it lightly and then proceeded to drive to your parents’ house.

he stopped in the drive way. it was a tiny home, very old with a bunch of flower pots that were wrapped up for the winter. it was lovely already. jake stopped the car and took deep breaths.

“you sound like you’re about to get into labor”

“it’s a neat trick you’ll have to try it”

and you both breathed fast like two freaks in the car while the music was playing in the background. some U2 song. it calmed the two of you down. when you got out of the car, jake immediately grabbed your hand. he needed the comfort.

you were about to ring the door bell when your mother slammed the door open and wrapped you in a tight hug.

jake smiled and looked behind her. he waved at your father.

“mom, dad, this is my boyfriend, jake. jake, this is my mom and dad.”

“hi mom, hi dad” jake replied and it made the two of them laugh.

jake wanted to bring champagne and flowers, but you convinced him to not do too much. your parents were simple people. they would be happy as long as jake didn’t tease you from under the table (the jeans were definitely a good option) or mentioned politics. 

“our daughter has told us a lot about you” your mother said “yeah, we heard you are a singer? isn’t that the dream” your father added

“yeah.” jake smiled awkwardly and took a sip from the glass of water you both shared. you were sitting on his lap, on the love seat of the small living room. your parents asked him tons of questions. he answered them genuinely. he asked them questions too. he was relieved to find out your father preferred hockey to golf.

you sat around the table. it was weird that the fourth chair of the dining table was finally used.

none of your previous relationships lasted long enough to reach this level of intimacy. sex was one thing, but meeting your parents? that was a HUGE deal.

jake behaved like the best man in the world. he complimented the food. it was just simple spaghetti and storebought garlic bread. but it tasted like love and home. he asked for two other plates. your mom even reached to wipe his chin from the tomato sauce.

it filled him with joy. he had a tough relationship with his own family and he felt like he fit right in with yours.

you watched jake with heart eyes. he was so happy to explain his art and craft to your father who kept asking him if he had met blake shelton or the backstreet boys. you know, hip people. jake laughed and shook his head. he didn’t bother explaining that he sang about filthy things the two of you did. he was happy they considered his job as valid. he was not a carpenter or a doctor. but he was happy to spoil you nonetheless.

“you’re doing great” you’d whisper to jake.

everything was fine. until your mom pulled out the baby photos albums. THE SHAME.

“look at that tiny baby booty!” jake pointed and melted. “toohtless! that gums only look, can’t wait to see it again when we’re old and grumpy.” he pulled out a photo. you were wearing matching ugly yellow zipped hoodie and plaid pants. you were holding a teddy bear of the same colour as the one he got you for your birthday. behind the photography it was written happy y/n at the park with her best friend. he asked if he could keep it. your parents agreed. (it was his phone home screen from now on, your lock screen being a post sex glow photo when he could see a tiny drop of cum at the corner of your eye, it was still cute to him). “so she’s always been bad at cooking?” he said and laughed when you found a picture of you and your grandparents where you held a plate of burnt cookies. “hey, not cool! i was only seven!” you pushed him gently. “look at you now, you burn bread in the toaster”. your parents were the ones who melted now.

“so, jacob...”

jake insisted that it was fine your father called him by his full name.

the two of you were so stressed out. the tone of your father’s voice was suddenly heavy and scary.

“yeah?”

“does it hurt to get tattoos?”

jake squinted and you coughed loud enough to cover the whispered what the fuck that came out of his open mouth. his sleeves were rolled up and exposing the ink. “i mean, yeah, it hurts a lot. it’s worth it though. i feel like an art collector.”

“in my young days, i’ve always wanted a tattoo. i got the concept. this lovely lady as a pin up girl, quite impressive, huh?.” he winked at your mom who blushed while you tried everything you could not to throw up.

jake rolled his sleeve a little higher and pointed at a spot near the veins of the inside of his arm, close to the elbow. he got the outline of a heart tattooed. you noticed how wobbly the lines were, that’s because it was the heart you always drew at the end of your notes that you left him when you were gone or when he was out working. “that’s my favourite.”

THE WAY YOU JUST BURST INTO TEARS and your mom shouted “time for dessert!”

great timing.

“our daughter told us you loved m&m’s”.

jake turned to look at you. you shrugged.

your mother came back with chocolate cake on which she had sprinked crushed m&m pieces on the frosting.

jake asked to get the biggest slice. “that’s the best fuckin’ cake i’ve had in my whole life.” (which was a lie because the best cake was your ass but details) he said, his mouth full. your mother laughed and your father agreed. they began talking about hockey when your mother asked for your help in the kitchen.

“if we learned anything from you,” she started and handed you a plate to dry. you hated to do the dishes, especially if you were to be lectured like a child. “it’s to never judge people by their covers. we love jake. he’s good to you. you’re good to him.”

you hugged your mom and the two of you cried so loudly that jake dropped his spoon. he thought something bad happened. that you cut yourself with the butter knife or something.

“welcome to the family, jake.” your father squeezed jake’s shoulder as you walked back to him to press a kiss on his cheek.

it was now time to leave, after hours and hours of anecdotes from your childhood or from the time you were convinced you’d marry brad pitt or when you put eyeshadow in your hair to act like you dyed them to be punk but it was raining that day and you came back looking like a sad frosty rainbow.

“you’re my favourite person.” jake told you when he gave you his vest as a coat. it was chilly outside.

you all hugged and shook hands, promising to come back soon for brunch. jake told them he’d make his famous pancakes.

“hold on!” jake exclaimed and pulled you by the arm. you followed him back in the kitchen and he fed you a spoon of the cake. you fed him one in return again. “tastes almost as good as your pussy” he whispered in your ear and kissed your chocolate covered lips.

you finally left the house, waving from the car at your parents who stood on the porch. they seemed satisfied. and you? you had never been more in love.

“can’t wait to rip those tight jeans off your body and fuck you like a bitch.” jake winked and started to drive away. “i’m looking forward to the toothless viagra boosted blowjobs too, that’s gonna feel divine.” 

you slapped his thigh and he moaned in pain. you rested your hand there and he brought it to his lips, planting a soft kiss.

“welcome to the family.” you repeated.

#Anonymous #topic: rapper!jake #series: southpaw

[dreamlover31]

Love Will Find a Way: Chapter 5

It was supposed to be a routine operation; Olivia would bring the young woman looking to leave her abusive boyfriend to the shelter, her and Alexa would go over the rules and regulations and she would get herself settled in. However, this day was going to be anything but routine, it all began in the early morning hours; after spending the night at Rafael’s place, Alexa was less than willing to crawl out of bed and start the day. All she wanted was to spend a few more minutes wrapped around in his big, strong arms and snuggle up against his gorgeous chest hair, but as they say duty calls, so after slowly getting out of bed and taking a quick shower, Alexa received a page from Olivia saying that she had just brought a woman to the shelter. As she gave the description of her, Alexa assessed that this was the same woman she read of in the file that was received a couple of weeks ago; the one who had the corrections officer boyfriend who terrorized her for years.

After sending her a confirmation that she was on her way, Alexa changed into the clothes that she brought over in an overnight bag and walked into the kitchen, where Rafael was brewing some coffee. As he brought over two mugs, Alexa quickly took a sip of hers and explained to him that Liv needed her down at the shelter asap.

“Sorry to have to run out on you like this”

“It’s ok I understand, are we still on for tonight?”

“Oh you mean the ballet, yeah of course”

“Alright, I’ll see you tonight,” Rafael leaned in and planted a small kiss on Alexa’s lips before she headed out the door.

Upon arriving at the shelter, Alexa was met by Olivia and the young blonde haired woman who was practically shaking like a leaf and could barely look her in the eye, at that moment, Alexa’s mind flashed back to the days when she saw that same timid expression on her mother’s face whenever they were out in public; especially when it was after one of the violent beatings initiated by her father. Alexa carefully approached the woman in a composed and calming manner, Alexa held out her hand as she made the introductions, the woman returned the handshake as she introduced herself as Nicole.

“Yeah, I know who you are, I read your file”

“Oh…right sorry”

“Hey you have nothing to be sorry about, you’re doing a brave thing here”

As the three of them went inside, Nicole was introduced to the security guard named Edwin who Alexa assured was more than capable of protecting everyone in the building, as they made their way down the hall, Alexa pointed out to one of the spacious rooms that she’d be staying in as well as the dining area further down. Olivia then explained to her some of the guidelines that she’d have to go buy until it was safe for her to be on her own, then she reached into her pocket and pulled out what looked like a garage door opener when in fact, it was a silent alarm. Olivia told Nicole that if she was ever in trouble, to press the red button and the alert would be sent to her phone and that she and another one of her detectives would rush to her aid, Nicole nodded as Olivia handed it to her.

“Well now that we’ve gotten the formalities out of the way, why don’t I show you to your room that way you can get settled in. Afterwards, we can join the others in the mess hall for a quick bite to eat and go from there”

“That sounds great, what do you think Nicole?”

“Yeah sure that sounds fine”

Once Nicole unpacked her things, the trio made their way towards the dining room; the chef prepared an excellent meal of Salisbury steak with mashed potatoes and gravy along with a side of peas. As they sat down, Alexa saw Nicole’s demeanor change a little, it was like for the first time in her life, she felt safe. During the course of their meal, all three of them made small talk, Alexa asked Nicole about her family and what her plans were for the future; she spoke of how her parents divorced when she was young and how her mother had a revolving door of boyfriends, one of which would sneak into her room at night while her mother was passed out on the couch. 

As she listened to her story, Alexa felt like she could relate to certain aspects of it, while she was never sexually abused, she knew what it was like to live in fear; to wake up every day wishing that the pain would stop or how she thought to herself of how she would rather die than go on living. After dinner, Alexa and Olivia were cleaning up the plates when suddenly, a strange noise stopped the two of them dead in their tracks. Slowly, they crept out into the hallway and looked around to ascertain where it was coming from.

Bang

There it was again, Alexa looked over at Olivia and asked:

“What is that?”

“Stay here, I’ll check it out”

Alexa watched as Olivia walked down the hallway with her gun drawn, but deep down she knew something wasn’t right, she could feel a knot building up at the pit of her stomach. Once Olivia disappeared from her sight, it was then that Alexa realized that there were people still inside, she knew that part of her obligation was to ensure their safety so against Olivia’s wishes, she decided to go on her own and find the others. As she made it to her office, Alexa was startled when she saw at the corner of her eye, her office assistant Gladys. The woman who was usually so bubbly and cheery was now standing in front of Alexa, looking at her as if she had seen the devil himself, she reached out to her with both hands to try and calm her down.

“Gladys, what the hell’s going on”

“Edwin’s dead,” she exclaimed.

“What…what are you talking about?”

“I was on my way out when I saw this man in a baseball cap, Edwin asked him what he was doing here and before he could walk him out…this guy pulls out a gun and shoots him. I got out of there as fast as I could.”

“What about the others, where are they?”

“Don’t worry, I got them all out through the back door”

“Oh thank god…come on we have to find Olivia”

As they searched every corridor, Alexa and Gladys were careful to check the corners and to stay low and quiet so as not to alert the gunman there were more people in the building. As they slowly made their trek down the hall where it lead to the living room area, there were voices coming from one of the rooms next to it, as Alexa peeked through the crack in the door, she saw Olivia standing in front of a tall white man with the baseball cap that Gladys earlier described as he pointed a gun at her face.

“Alright Kevin, let’s just take a deep breath and talk about this”

“Shut up bitch…you don’t think I know what you’re trying to do, that psych cop crap’s not going to work on me” 

So many emotions were going through Alexa’s head, there was a part of her that wanted to help her oldest and dearest friend while the rational part knew that it was too big of a risk, as her mind scrambled to come up with a solution, the man spoke again with a harsh tone.

“Where’s that little cunt Nicole, I want to see her right now”

“She’s not here Kevin”

“Don’t you fucking lie to me, you think I didn’t know she was leaving me…I got friends man and they told me the score, matter fact…where’s that other whore?”

“Kevin, she doesn’t need to be involved in this”

“Oh I think she does, seeing is how the two of you tagged teamed Nicole into leaving me…I warned that stupid bitch”

As Alexa and Gladys continued to stand behind the doorway, she felt helpless, the same kind of helplessness she felt when her mother was being beaten; Alexa swore to herself that she would never be put in that position again. She knew that the situation would escalate if she didn’t do something, so she turned to Gladys and told her in a hushed tone to get out of the building, the bewildered young woman looked at Alexa and said:

“What…no I’m not leaving you here with that maniac”

“I’ll be fine, trust me, when you get out call SVU and tell them what’s going on…everything’s going to be alright I promise”

With that, Gladys quietly made her way down the hall that had the quickest access to the front door, Alexa quickly turned back to see what was happening, right away she could tell that the man pointing the gun was losing his patience with Olivia’s stalling tactics. A sense of relief washed over Alexa as she heard the sounds of police sirens in the distance, she looked on as the man walked towards the window and yelled:

“What the fuck, who called the cops? Someone else is in this building…” he stalked back towards Olivia and pointed his gun at her temple.

“Tell me who else is in this building or I will blow your brains out…I’m going to count to three…one…two…” his voice trailed off as he cocked the hammer of the gun back.

Before he could get to three, Alexa bolted inside the room and said:

“It was me, I called them”

“Well you must be the other do gooder that stuck your nose where it didn’t belong”

“So your Nicole’s boyfriend…listen it’s not too late, we can all walk out of here and…her voice trailed off as she slowly walked towards him with her hands up in the air, but before she could finish her sentence, Kevin pistol whipped Alexa across the face so hard that she fell to the floor.

“I already told your friend here, that psychobabble stuff’s not going to work on me”

After getting over the initial shock, Alexa slowly stood up and walked over to Olivia, as he pointed the gun at both of them; the sounds of a vibrating object could be heard, but there was no way of knowing where it was coming from. It wasn’t until Alexa saw Kevin reach into his pocket and pulled out what she assumed to be Olivia’s phone, he looked at the screen and swiped right to ignore the call, a few seconds go by before it vibrates again as he seethed with rage.

“Kevin…that’s probably the hostage negotiator trying to get a hold of you, if you don’t answer it then they’re going to come in here guns blazing”

“If I go down, I’m bringing you bitches with me”

In that moment, Alexa decided to go at the situation in a different angle.

“Kevin…you were right, Olivia and I had no business butting into yours and Nicole’s relationship. In fact, we would like to apologize for all the trouble we caused you and if you let us go now, it’ll show Nicole that you’re not such a bad guy after all”

As much as it sickened her to say that, it seemed like the words were starting to get through to him, after the phone vibrated for like the sixth time he decided to answer it. Meanwhile, in front of the building, there were a line of squad cars up and down the block with an ambulance waiting on standby in case of any casualties and a full SWAT team ready to make entry. Members of the SVU team were there as well securing the perimeter, Fin and Rollins were inside the mobile unit with Tucker, while Carisi and Dodds were outside trying to get a confirmation that Alexa and Olivia were still alive. Tucker still had the phone to his ear as he conversed with Fin and Rollins.

“Alright what do we know about this guy?”

“Well his name is Kevin Armitage, he’s a corrections officer who works out of Rikers, his girlfriend filed a domestic violence complaint and was referred by Liv to stay at the shelter”

“Somehow he got the info that she was leaving him and decided it was payback time”

“And now he’s got two hostages and feels like he’s got nothing to lose”

After a few more rings, Tucker heard a voice on the other end.

“Hello”

“Hello is this Kevin? My name is Lieutenant Tucker, first of all I need to know if Lieutenant Benson and Alexa Duvall are alright”

“Hold on let me put you on speaker”

As he pressed the speaker button on the phone, he held it out palm flat as Olivia relayed to Tucker that they were alright and that Kevin was taking good care of them. Once confirmation was received, Tucker then tried to put Kevin’s mind at ease by saying that he wouldn’t be prosecuted if he let them go, but then he spoke up:

“What do you think I am stupid? There’s no way in hell I’m walking out of here a free man”

“No it’s true…my boyfriend’s a DA, he’ll make it happen,” Alexa interjected.

After a brief moment of silence, Kevin went on to say that he wanted something in writing that there would be no charges filed against him, and that he wanted Alexa’s boyfriend to sign off on it.

“Alright Kevin, one of my colleagues is going to contact the DA right now and get that sorted out for you…is there anything else you want?”

“I want to talk to Nicole”

“Ok Kevin we can do that”

“You better not be jerking me around, cause if you are I’ll blow these bitches away”

“I give you my word Kevin, nobody is jerking you around”

After he hung up, the only thing going through Alexa’s mind, other than survival, was seeing the look on Rafael’s face when he got the call that her and Olivia had been taken hostage. She dreaded the thought of him worrying about whether or not he was going to see her again, the pain and the anguish he would feel and the feeling of powerlessness of not being able to come to her rescue. Outside, Carisi walked the perimeter, then at the corner of his eye, he saw a black SUV pull up with Dodds and Barba getting out of it, Barba ran up to him and said:

“What’s going on, are they alright?”

“They’re fine counselor, the guy asked for a DA to come down and put it in writing that he wouldn’t be charged”

“There is no way in hell that’s going to happen”

“I know…but he doesn’t know that”

The three of them turned to see Fin, Rollins and Tucker exiting the mobile unit, as the group stood in front of the building; Barba was briefed on the situation.

“Counselor”

“Tucker, so have you made contact yet?”

“Just about to”

As Olivia and Alexa stood for what felt like an eternity, her phone vibrated again, upon answering it, Tucker informed Kevin that the DA was here with a binding contract that stated that he wouldn’t be brought up on federal charges of murder and kidnapping.

“Alright, what about Nicole?”

“We’re tracking her down Kevin”

“No don’t give me that, I want to see her right now”

“I understand that Kevin but it’s going to take a little time”

“You’ve got 5 minutes and if she’s not here by then that DA’s going to be buying roses for his sweetheart…to put on her grave”

A cold chill ran down Rafael’s spine as he heard those words, the thought of him not being able to hold Alexa or to touch her sweet face again filled his heart with ache. He tried telling himself that Tucker was going to get them out of this situation, he had done it before when Liv was taken by that cokehead and his girlfriend at that townhouse a few months back. As the clock was slowly ticking down to Kevin’s 5-minute deadline, things were starting to get tense in the small room, Kevin was pacing back and forth and looking out the window for Nicole but to no avail. The more agitated he got, the more likely he was going to do something drastic and then once again, Tucker phoned in.

“What”

“Kevin, we are still trying to find Nicole but in the meantime how about you show us some good faith and release one of the hostages so that once we do find her, she’ll be more at ease speaking with you”

“Good faith…I’ll show you some good faith”

As soon as he hung up the phone, Kevin throws it to the ground and stomped on it until it was in pieces, Alexa and Olivia looked at each other and knew that this was it. Then he took a step forward and pointed the gun at both of you with the safety still off.

“So…which one of you cunts gets to die first?”

Not willing to answer him, he decided to use the gun as a prop for a sick game of eeney- meeney-meiney-mo, as he switched the gun back and forth; the same bravery that took over Alexa when she decided to stay behind was starting to build up again. As Kevin reached the end of the rhyme, the gun was going towards Olivia until she decided to grab it by the barrel and with all of her strength pushed him back up against the wall, as the two of them struggled for control of the gun; Olivia broke the window and called out to the SWAT team below to enter the building.

Bang

At first Alexa didn’t hear the gun go off, but then she felt warm liquid pool over her shirt, as she slowly backed away, she pressed her hand on her stomach and saw that it was covered in what she realized was blood; her blood. Suddenly, as if everything was in slow motion, Alexa collapsed on the floor, vision was going in and out and voices started to fade.

“Oh God, Alexa”

Was that Liv?

Then there were the deafening sounds of two more gunshots.

“Suspect is down; I repeat suspect is down”

Who was that…what’s happening?

“We need a gurney in here now!”

Fin…is that you?

As she laid there, slowly bleeding out, she could faintly hear the sounds of footsteps coming towards her; naturally she assumed that it was the paramedics, but as she struggled to look up, she saw the face of the last person she’d ever wanted to see sprawled out on the floor in a pool of her own blood. As Rafael leaned down and used his large hands to cup both sides of her cheeks, Alexa smiled weakly as he looked at her; his eyes starting to well up as he kept telling her to stay with him. Those would be the last words she’d ever hear as darkness took over.

Tagging: @madpanda75 @madamsnape921 @karens-imagined-world @itsjustmyfantasyroom @youreverycolor @misssirenlove @beccabarba @laceybellerain @southern-magnolia @thatesqcrush @glimmerglittergirl​ @tropes-and-tales​

#rafael barba x reader #love will find a way #raul esparza

[no6secretsanta]

Gala Grind

WOO SECRET SANTA! 

@allxkka this is for you! YOU ASKED FOR AN AU, high school, college, or theater and well, THIS HAPPENED. All three of those things get mentioned in this fic? So… : ) Hope you enjoy.

(should be up on my archive by now, if it isn’t, it will be shortly)

---

Hours earlier, Nezumi had watched as the average hotel lobby transformed into an expensive-looking Gala hall, courtesy of staff members with dead eyes. At the time, he’d found it impressive, the way the white cloth tables, goody-bags, and endless floral arrangements were able to grant the blank room a weighted sort of potential energy.  

Now, though, he was confident that he had only watched the room go from one form of emptiness to another. Goody-bags were swept under chairs in an unending flood of expensive champagne and cheap conversation. Nezumi could feel the flowers wilting.  

“What’s the name of this company anyway?” he asked the man sitting across from him. The placard at his seat read: “Yoming”.

“Civitas Rosis. You don’t know of us?” Yoming replied. As he spoke a shiny gold watch on his wrist caught the light.

Nezumi’s finger traced the rim of his champagne glass - of course it was empty, now when he needed it most. “I’m a plus-one,” he said. “Guest of a guest. That is quite a name." 

"It’s Latin. The title is from one of our parent companies we outgrew,” Yoming said, with the air of a proud conqueror. “The taking of their title was a sort of symbolic representation of our independence. We’re the kind of place that never forgets the little steps that helped us get where we are.”

“Oh, I see. A real rags-to-riches Cinderella story.”

“We consider it more David and Goliath,” Yoming said, dark eyes glinting. Nezumi envisioned a future where he strangled him with his necktie, unbuckled the watch from his wrist, and pawned it off for a lifetime supply of macaroons. It was a bright future.

“Of course,” Nezumi drawled. “Although…in this David and Goliath story David would have to put on Goliath’s skin after he took him down. A little too graphic to market, don’t you think?”

The businessman fluffed up like an offended bird. “What did you say your name was?”

“My name? Rikiga,” Nezumi simpered, and then flashed his teeth. “Most sincere apologies. Are you always so defensive or did you steal that from your dead parent company too?”

The silence between them stretched for a full minute - not that anyone could tell over the boot-licking and networking chatter that filled the rest of the dining area. 

“Who are you guest of?” Yoming asked, slowly.

The caterer, Nezumi thought, but he wasn’t about to get Shion into trouble with his millionaire undercover boss. He pointed blindly at the name plaque next to him. Yoming’s face scrunched.

“Tori, I should have known.”

Nezumi had no idea who this Tori was, but he felt a fleeting sort of guilt for the resigned way Yoming said his name, and the speed at which he stood.

“Good day, Mr. Rikiga,” Yoming said in a tone of voice that made it abundantly clear nothing good was about to happen.

“A pleasure meeting you!" 

Yoming was dialing a number on his cellphone with frightening speed as he ducked out of the room. Poor Tori.

Oh well. It was time to leave that table anyway. First though…

The goody-bags were mostly filled with useless nonsense: Business cards and Civitas Rosis plastic shot glasses and salt-shakers, but there was a gem at the bottom. Nezumi dumped the junk into Tori’s abandoned bag, but rescued the carefully-wrapped bag of cookies and a card to Karan’s bakery - painfully sincere amongst all the company-labelled knick-knacks and trappings. 

Like a certain someone.

Nezumi exhaled. He probably shouldn’t have picked a fight. He hoped this minor tiff wouldn’t reflect negatively on Karan and Shion’s impeccable skills and service. He popped one of the cookies in his mouth, chewed.

"Nezumi!”

Shion. He was clumsily weaving through the tables - balm to Nezumi’s exhausted soul, relentlessly appealing in his all-black formal catering uniform.

“You look nice,” Nezumi swallowed appreciatively, before popping another cookie in his mouth, looking him up and down.

Flattery and exhaustion warred on Shion’s face. He pulled out the seat next to Nezumi, but then pushed it back in, evidently, deciding standing would be better.

“Something to say, Shion?”

“I have a favor to ask,” Shion said.

He held Nezumi’s hand in both of his. Nezumi stopped chewing.

 —

“Please Nezumi, their singer is sick!” Shion grumbled, following Nezumi into the bathroom so they could keep the conversation private. “They need someone to sing a few songs and say just a few nice things about the company and I know you’ve done galas before—hey. Don’t look like that. You have the training for this!” 

“I dropped out, Shion,” Nezumi replied, colder than he meant to be.

Training was a bit of a trigger word if he was being completely honest. As a proud college dropout, he had recently come to terms with the fact that the best thing his stint in academia had given him was ecologist-turned-caterer Shion.

Shion was not deterred. He shook his head, quickly slipping an OUT OF ORDER sign onto the door to the men’s bathroom.

“Listen to me—"

“—Why are you carrying that?” Nezumi asked, temporarily distracted.

“Sometimes caterers need some time alone,” Shion clarified without hesitation. “I’m not giving up on this. You’re the only one who can do this Nezumi, and your voice is beautiful. You have soul. That’s all an audience needs. A diploma doesn’t matter— You taught me that.”

Ugh, Nezumi had. Theoretically. Shion had been miserable in grad school, signing up for all the most difficult labs to challenge his own brilliant mind. It had been a mistake. A brilliant mind wasn’t what his professors wanted— cutting corners was, and Shion wasn’t going to do that.

Shion had dropped first. A month later, Nezumi made the same call, but for very different reasons.

Pursuing a degree in theater, in all honesty, had been a mistake.

His heart had wanted it, though. Nezumi’s stupid heart, still beating, ever-longing, ready to make important life decisions with the loudest possible voice no matter how deeply he buried it in his chest. His heart had won him over during the lonely years after high school— singing in bars for tips. It had convinced him that with education maybe that could be a job—his full-time job. A job where he wouldn’t have to scrape by and beg.

So, he had saved. He had saved and he paid for some classes. An education. Rags-to-riches, right?

As it turned out, Nezumi paid a lot for academia to teach his heart what his head knew already: love was disappointing. Love didn’t fill your stomach, or your pockets. Love left you with debt—left you with dreams. Singing wasn’t a career—it was a survival mechanism.

So yeah, he didn’t much like to be reminded of his training. He didn’t particularly like to be reminded of his soul, either.

“Shion—” he started, but Shion kissed him before he could finish, pressing him gently into the wall of the nice hotel bathroom. His heart took over— no more thoughts— as he wrapped his arms around Shion’s shoulders and felt the fabric of his stupid hot catering uniform. Warm. Shion was so fucking warm, all the time.

He had just about forgotten what they were talking about when Shion broke away, eyes impossibly bright.

“I know you,” he whispered, voice low and urgent enough to send a tiny, tiny tremor down Nezumi’s spine. “I know you, Nezumi, and you love to perform. Why are you resisting? What’s holding you back? Let me help.”

His hand was on Nezumi’s cheek, and Nezumi felt his resolve crumble.

Dammit. Damn him. Damn this. Damn the excitement in Nezumi’s veins, the stupid thrilling call of the stage. Damn this man, this infuriating, wonderful man that knew Nezumi’s stupid, stupid, stupid, theatrical heart.

“I’ll sing, Shion,” he said, finally, meeting the torrent that was Shion’s eyes. “I just can’t promise any miracles. Don’t get your hopes up.”

“I’m not asking for miracles, Nezumi,” Shion replied, grinning victoriously. His lips were red; his cheeks appealingly flushed. “Just you. Just your voice. That’s always been enough, you know.”

Nezumi’s heart may have lost when it came to his college education, but with Shion…Well. Maybe the debt was worth it.

—-

Nezumi stood in front of the crowd, microphone in hand. His set list and suggested script sat on a music stand in a black binder. No one would have to know there was actually no paper in the binder, but rather that everything had been hastily scrawled on a napkin by the company treasurer.

Nezumi tapped the microphone once. Feedback echoed through the gala hall, but hey, it caught everyone’s attention so mission accomplished.

“Having fun tonight?” he offered to the stuffy suits and ties. He was rewarded with polite applause.

God, Nezumi thought. Sounds like a fucking golf game. He almost missed the constant cat-calls of his bar. Almost.

His heart was beating though, thudding in a way that clearly never got the message this was stupid and pointless. His eyes scanned the crowd and found Karan and Shion at their modest table in the back. He smiled, for them, slipping into the role of gala MC.

Shion really did look great in that uniform.

“Let’s give another round of applause for our lovely host Civitas Rosis — long may they reign!”

The sarcasm didn’t slip through to his voice but judging by the rewarding scowl on Yoming’s face and the expanding smile on Shion’s— it was understood by the parties that needed to hear it.

Shion, to Nezumi’s surprise and delight, couldn’t stand Yoming either. He had apparently been flirting at Karan for almost the entire party, and Shion, for all his gullibility, had a bullshit detector that could rival Nezumi’s. When he had heard about Nezumi’s earlier argument, seconds before Nezumi was shoved to the stage, his face had changed. There was a rare, vengeful glint in his eyes as he whispered: Honestly, I’m glad you did— now maybe I’ll be able to resist arguing with him, myself. Maybe.

Fuck, Nezumi loved him.

It was a stray thought, but a true one, and one Nezumi didn’t have time to over-consider as he picked up the mic and began to sing, voice echoing through the lobby.

Yoming, pleasingly, had a deep scowl on his face, but Karan was mouthing the words next to him. Yeah that wouldn’t last.

Nezumi’s life hadn’t really gone according to plan.

He was a college drop-out singing in a hotel lobby that meant nothing to him, and for a company he couldn’t stand.

But still, he smiled as he sang. It wasn’t to survive— wasn’t for an ill-advised money-making dream, but for the caterer watching with enamored eyes in the back of the room.

It was fun. His heart pulsed in his chest, poor, but satisfied.

It was his best performance yet.

#secretagentfan #allxkka #no6 #no 6 #no.6 #no. 6 #no6secretsanta #gala grind #nezumi #submission

[reeesea]

Something Sweet: Part One

~the sweetest drink on the menu~

one ~ two ~ three ~ four ~ five ~ six ~ seven ~ eight ~ nine

pairing: just minsung, han jisung/lee minho

warnings: mild language (like barely)

words: 3.5k (2k too many ngl)

summary: Minho is working his usual shift at Seoul's most expensive high end restaurant, when a trio of new-comers arrive and by the end of Minho’s tedious night he’s plus one additional phone number.

a/n: To be honest this is the first thing I’ve ever written and actually posted. SO please accept this minsung one-shot that just came out of wanting more waiter Minho in my life. anyway if you read it and like it let me know, and maybe ill write more of it. In my head it has at least a few more chapters of non-plot where the other boys show up <3

---------------------

It had only been an hour since the dinner rush started and Minho was already counting the minutes until he could collect his tips and go home. Sure, he could think of countless more exhausting jobs compared to being a waiter at Menu 98 (an upscale restaurant in a part of town he most definitely did not live in), but today just hit different. He never had to do much more than just put on his Customer Server Smile ™, not mess up the orders, pour the wine without spilling, and recommend the highest priced appetizer if asked. Pretty simple stuff. Nothing too draining, but still the exhaustion set in, probably due to spending 2 more hours in the dance studio than he should’ve the previous day. 

His feet were paying for those additional long hours trying to perfect choreo by making each minute of his shift more painful than the last. Even so, working at the ever popular restaurant paid for the daily discomfort that Minho may have felt from his blistered feet. The restaurant was a well known hot spot for anyone with enough money to casually spend the equivalent of three of Minho's paychecks on a meal. CEOs and their business partners along with idols and some lesser known celebrities made up most of their usual clientele on a casual Friday night like this one. The customers always came in waves on Friday evenings, parties of usually 4 or more coming in to celebrate some successful business venture that took place during the week. Great for Minho really, because that meant usually more wine, more appetizers, larger meals, and larger checks, which means bigger tips. His bank account really needed these Fridays especially if he was gong to keep saving up to finally pursue his dream. 

A new party of six was just assigned to Minho’s section. Trademarked smile: on, Feet: still aching, Hours until close: at least another three. It looked like tonight it was going to be a long ass night. 

An hour or so passed before Minho was able to get some form of rest from being out on the floor. Minho leaned his body weight against the wall near the back of the dining room, appreciating the brief calm before the night crowd started to roll in. Thoughts of the dance he was trying to choreograph flashed through his head. He hoped that the movements he’d chosen would be able to convey the emotions of the song he had in mind. The thought of asking Hyunjin to watch his performance briefly popped in his head, but before he could consider it further the hostess was calling his name. 

“Minho! There's a new table for you in section three.” Minho moved from his comfortable position against the wall and went through his checklist; Apron? Flattened. Backup pens? Check. Hair gently moved out of his face to perfectly frame it? Check. Lastly, Polite customer service smile? Obviously. 

The three boys at the table were definitely new customers to the restaurant. Minho observed that the three of them appeared to be blissfully unaware of the de facto business casual to fully formal dress code that the other patrons in the restaurant followed. The Trio seemed to sport the street style that you would see in the popular clubs not only a block away. Two of them clothed in almost all black outfits while the third wore a bright pink colored hoodie under his jean jacket. 

“Hyung, I still can’t believe we did it! The crowd was huge, I mean after going on stage I don't even remember anything. I might have blacked out. Holy shit did I actually black out….” Pink hoodie seemed pretty animated about whatever the reason was for their meal out. Maybe a little too animated, as other tables glazed bitterly toward the source of their evening’s disruption.   

Before approaching he considered the possibility that these boys being idols was likely, but Minho still found it odd for multiple reasons. He didn't recognize them at all as idols, which he was usually pretty good at keeping up with, and when idols did casually come in it was more likely to be on a weekday for an early dinner and not a late Friday night after the dinner rush. Nonetheless, with his perfect waiter image on, he walks over to the table never showing his curiosity.

“Good evening gentlemen, My name is Minho, and I’ll be serving you tonight. Is there anything I can get you to drink before your starters?” His script rolled politely off his tongue like it had the whole night. All complete with a slight smile and arms perfectly placed behind him, as carefully and as naturally as a doll whose been posed in the same position for the past six hours.

The wide set, somewhat brooding boy has already decided after glancing at the drink menu, “yeah I'll order a bottle of the house red for the table,” glancing up at Minho from beneath his black cap. Minho swiftly wrote down the order, and moved his glance over to the next boy at the table.

“Hyung, you're the only one of us who chooses to drink wine voluntarily,” Pink hoodie spoke up, seemingly upset about the prospect of drinking bitter fruit water. 

“Jisung, you're just saying that because you can't handle anything that you can actually taste the alcohol in. I'll drink whatever Bin gets,” the handsome curly haired blonde mentions, glancing at the soft hoodied boy next to him with a look that reminds Minho of a disappointed father. Minho actively fights off the smirk that is wanting to form on his lips.

“WHAT that's not true, THAT ONE TIME I drank an entire bottle of-”

“Fine, fine just stop yelling. You’re gonna get us kicked out before we even get to eat” Mr. Black cap glances up at Minho again, but with a more apologetic look. “Add on an order of the fruitiest and sweetest drink you serve still with alcohol in it, for the small squirrel boy.” That last part came with a smirk from the dark haired speaker and a glare from from the ‘squirrel boy’ to his left. 

Minho had trouble keeping the smirk from forming this time. And maybe his perfect image faltered for a second, but he was quick to recover, and confirmed their orders with a straight face and a promise to return with water as he left to give them time to select from the menu. 

---

“Great now our waiter thinks I'm a whiny baby who looks like a squirrel. Wow, thanks Changbin-hyung.” Jisung grumbles and pinches his cheeks that cursed him with the rodent nickname. 

“Good, at least he won’t be fooled into thinking you're anything but the truth” 

“Yah! WHa-”

“Hey settle down you guys, lets try not to get kicked out please. Binnie recommended the food here, and I would very much like to eat it before we are politely asked to leave” 

Jisung grumbles something inaudible at Chan’s request, and Changbin can't help but respond with a smirk at getting to see the younger be told off.

“Also we're supposed to be celebrating selling out our show so lets do that, yeah? First show 3racha single handedly sold out! WE did that!” 

All three of them get proud smiles after that, and the bickering is left forgotten as the three recount the night, even though they had lived it together

“Not gonna lie, I think our Binnie stole the show tonight. You were on fire tonight man.” Chan said proudly, receiving a thankful smile from the younger boy, who had become shy and bashful at the praise.

“Though, Chan-hyung your rap was so charismatic tonight, you almost made that girl in front faint when you winked at her, the whole audience fucking lost it” Jisung had switched from literally yelling to just a whisper shout for emphasis.

“Hahaha, yeah I can't even believe that happened. Man, today’s energy was just different.” The smile on Chan’s face was blinding, as usual. “Hopefully we can get to play even bigger venues soon. I could get used to this...” Chan mused, seemingly already focused on the future plans of 3racha. 

“Yeah, those paydays would be real nice right about now.”

“Bin-hyung, what are you talking about, you’re literally loaded. Plus since you got that producing job, we can actually pay the rent on the apartment you parents let us stay in '' Jisungs pretty thankful for all the support Changbins parents had given them, while the three of them worked toward their collective dream to make and perform music. But he thinks they all can agree that finally being able to use their own money to live instead of just relying on handouts and the kindness of friends or family to help keep them from becoming starved or homeless, is a new kind of satisfying that Jisung hadn’t considered before. Just look at them now, at one of the nicest (and most expensive) restaurants in Seoul, fighting over drinks and having a meal that would hopefully be the first of many celebrations for their groups accomplishments. The trio could all agree that the financial stress has been one of their greatest worries, and that beginning to escape it has been all kinds of relieving. 

Before any of the boys could respond to Jisung’s comment, Minho had returned with three glasses of water, three glasses for wine, and a bottle of wine all balanced perfectly on a tray perched on the palm of his hand. Jisung had to admit it was impressive how he had managed to balance all of the glassware and liquids without losing balance, and while moving with more grace and agility than he would expect from your average waiter. 

Before Jisung had even returned from his thoughts, three glasses of water and the expertly poured wine glasses, all set delicately without a single drop spilled, were identically placed in front of each of them. Graceful may have been an understatement. 

“Have you decided what you would like to have tonight, gentlemen?” Their waiter Minho said, all with a gentle expression on his face. 

No, the answer was no, but before Jisung could respond, Changbin had already ordered the pricey steak to go with his wine. Soon after, Chan ordered the surf and turf dish that had a stupidly complicated name that Jisung couldn’t pronounce. Jisung hadn’t even remembered them even looking at the menu, or maybe it was just him who had yet to even glanced at it. Details. 

“Uhhhhh…” Jisung searched hopelessly over the menu and then at his friends, who stared blankly back at him, then back to the menu again. This was a regular occurrence when the three decided to go out and eat, when they weren’t holding themselves in their apartment for weeks at a time. Still, Jisung always ended up hopelessly unprepared to successfully order without awkward pauses and at least three consecutive strings of ‘hmm’s and ‘uhhh’s. And so,

“Hmmmmm…. I think.. Uhh…. maybe…” nothing was popping out at him, and Jisung was pretty sure at this point that he had forgotten how to read. “Ya know what, surprise me,” he decided this was the best response he could come up with.  

“Surprise you?” Minho looked just as confused as Jisung felt.

“Yeah, is that an option? If not, I'm this close to just closing my eyes and pointing.” He says while dramatically closing his eyes and waving his finger over the menu. Once again Jisung was hopeless.

He hears a soft chuckle and opens his eyes just in time to catch their waiter’s lips curl in a sweet smile that makes his eyes turn into crescents. It lasts barely a second, before his face returns to his neutral customer service expression. But Jisung decides he really likes that smile, and a part of him is sad to see it retreat so soon. 

“Well in that case, I can do the blind pointing for you, but I personally recommend the seasonally prepared local beef served on house baked brioche, that comes with garlic and parsley potato wedges. Does that sound alright?” Jisung felt he had said it faster and with more details just to confuse him. 

Jisung stares at him blankly in response, and he's pretty sure four whole seconds pass in silence before the Pretty Waiter ™ follows up, an ever so slight smirk on his lips, “it's pretty much a really good local burger with homemade fries, I think it would be something you would enjoy.” 

Jisung grins at that, “Oh! Yeah that does sound good...Thank you! I will have that.” For some reason he really likes the idea that their waiter chose something off the menu that was specially meant for him. Not that he wouldn't like all the nicer and fancier dishes they serve here with small plates with dry ice fog, but a part of him was more content in getting a dinner that didn't require him to question whether or not something on his plate was even edible. And the happy curiosity definitely had nothing to do with the way their waiter’s eyes sparkled when he talked or the barely-there smirk that Jisung just caught sight of. 

“Alright then, I’ll put in these orders. Oh! And then I'll be right back with your speciality fruit drink,” He says that last part with a slightly more upbeat tone, resulting in another smirk to appear on Changbin’s face and a groan from a slightly embarrassed Jisung.

---

Minho surprised himself. 

On any given day of work at Menu 98, he deathly avoids having to do anything more than the regular polite small talk. But for some reason, tonight he couldn’t stop himself from playing along with the antics of the cute boy at his table. The three boys were entertaining, and maybe he could blame the exhaustion and the numb pain in his heels, but the comical distraction was welcomed by Minho. He didn't even realize just how much he had been looking for a distraction from the long shift until it was staring right at him with big shiny eyes and a cute round face. Minho hurried back to enter in their orders, including his suggestion for the squirrel looking boy.

Minho wasn’t going to deny that the flustered boy at the table was cute, he was pretty aware how attractive all three the boys were when he took their orders. He had thought they were idols originally, so in Minho’s mind it made sense. Still, the waiter still felt something about the three was too unique to be categorized as just idols or trainees. As much as it may have piqued his curiosity though, Minho still got paid for his service not for his interests in customers, so he brushed it off almost as soon as it appeared. 

The rest of the evening, Minho tended to all four of his assigned tables with his usual perfect server act and minimal small talk. When it came to the three somewhat boisterous customers in the corner table, Minho may or may not have allowed himself to subtly laugh at their arguments and antics. The dynamic of the three boys was slowly becoming the highlight of his late night shift. Each of their personalities greatly contrasted and amplified the other, making way for animated and comical exchanges and arguments between them. 

When Minho had returned with a Strawberry daiquiri for the boy in pink, a chorus of giggles could be heard from the other two boys, while the other happily accepted the drink in substitute for the untouched glass of wine in front of him. Upon drinking it, the cute boy's eyes somehow widened further and shined more than Minho thought was possible. He flashed his heart-shaped smile as he thanked Minho for the drink. 

Minho nodded in return, and internally decided that Heart-shaped smiles were his new favorite. 

---

Jisung had been hyper since the show, and the energy was now focused on a new mission to see the pretty smile of their waiter again. Granted, he didn't have to try that much harder to gain the attention of the pretty waiter, being the loud and excitable person naturally he was. Every small grin that Jisung was able to pull out from under the other boy’s infuriatingly polite facade, was a major win in his book. 

Chan, Changbin, and Jisung celebrated further by enjoying the food, which was all phenomenal, and discussing their next gig the coming week. The best way to celebrate one performance is to look towards the next, or someother random bullshit Changbin had said after a couple more glasses of wine.

Overall the night was a celebration of all of the dedication and hours they had put into their music, as well as their grind to perform and grow a somewhat sizable following. They were all high on the potential of finally getting to realize their dreams and reach their goals as a group, something none of them actually thought they would get to do together. The overwhelming happiness of the night easily made it one of Jisung's new favorite memories. 

As the boys were finishing off their third--or forth--drink (Jisung definitely had another one of the strawberry drinks Minho had brought him), after dinner and figuring out their checks, Jisung felt a surge of boldness. Mostly due to having a few drinks in his system, and the slight infatuation he had with the pretty waiter's smile, Jisung decided ‘whats the worst thing that could happen? Rejection? lmao’ and wrote down his name and number on his receipt in hopes that Minho would actually read it, or maybe even contact him. Maybe. 

It was a shot in the dark, but Jisung had been feeling a little high on life, and felt like he couldn’t leave without at least shooting his shot. Jisung and the other members of 3racha got up to leave, and Jisung searched out the waiter. He  wasn’t able to see him in the mostly empty dining room now, but a hopeful part of him felt that he would see him again, leaving the restaurant with his arms around his members already bickering about who would get to shower first after their long night. 

“I'm just saying, Chan-hyung I know for a fact that you’re not even going to make it to the front door before passing out, so I call dibs. And Jisung, I’m older than you so I get veto power over your rights and decisions as your hyung.” 

Jisung was about to grumble in response but something about how Changbin’s smile was so carefree left him feeling like he deserved this victory. Changbin was definitely a little tipsy, but seeing his hyung so happy after such a rough week made Jisung glad to do anything to keep that smile there.

“Fine, fine hyung but you have to help me carry Chan-hyung up stairs when he inevitable falls asleep on me in the cab” 

“I don't know what youre talking about,” Chan replies, already yawning, while climbing into the cab.

---

Minho was picking up the receipts from his tables when one of them caught his eye.

Hey, I’m Han Jisung ^~^ (the cute one in the pink hoodie!)

Thanks for your suggestions, best waiter ever!!!

I think your smile is beautiful, Maybe I’ll get to see it again sometime?

555-XXX-XXXX

Minho couldn't help but smile to himself. He’d been hit on occasionally by customers and has been given countless numbers, which usually don't make it much farther than the trash, but something about the innocence of the note and cuteness of the boy made him actually consider keeping it.

He scoffed to himself after a second of considering it. As cute as the boy was, and as sweet as the note was, Minho didn’t have time or energy to have another added person in his life. No matter romantically or platonically, new relationships were on his ‘things to stay away from if you ever wanna make it into the dance academy’ list. He already barely ever saw his roommates, and if they weren't all in the same dance troupe, they probably wouldn't talk much. All of their time was spent working and practicing, and he and his roommates only had enough energy and free time to spend a meal or two together on the weekends. There just wasn’t any more time for anything extra, no matter how nice the idea may sound. 

He was about to give the little message the same treatment as the others as he cleaned up for the night, but a part of him couldn't bring himself to throw it away, and discreetly pocketed it instead out of instinct. Out of sight and out of mind as far as Minho was concerned.

-----

thank you if you read this far <3

one ~ two ~ three ~ four ~ five ~ six ~ seven ~ eight ~ nine

#stray kids #skz #minsung #stray kids fic #skz fic #han jisung #lee minho #lee know #I love my sons #gods menu #restaurant au

[acewong]

The Interviews || Self-Para

Where: Santa Monica, California / San Francisco, California (in flashbacks)

When: February 2021 / flashbacks throughout Ace’s childhood

Featuring: Robin Horowitz, Tao Wong, Chelsea Cohen

Triggers: Mention of hospitals, mention of surgery 

In recent months, Ace had gotten into YouTube, specifically making vlogs. As apart of a series he was doing about his experience as a deaf person, he decided to interview his family to get a better sense of what it was like to watch him grow up and lose his hearing. It wasn’t something they as a family ever really talked about, so part of the project was getting to know the truth for himself. 

He went in with a vague idea of what he wanted to ask his family about, but he didn’t have any formal questions written out. Ace figured he didn’t need them because the conversations would flow organically.

Mom

The first interview was with his mom. Ace’s mom worked five days per week, and Ace worked Saturdays, so the only time he could find to interview her was on Sunday morning. After eating breakfast together, Ace set up the camera. He would’ve started sooner, but Robin insisted that she needed to put on something nice and do her hair and makeup. An hour went by, and Robin finally returned to the dining room. 

Once Ace gave her the signal that he was recording, Robin said into the camera, “Hi, internet. My name is Robin and I’m Asa’s mom.”

Ace then asked, “So, Mom, did you have any idea that I would lose my hearing when I grew up?”

“I knew it was a possibility, but not that it would happen when you were so young. When I got pregnant with you, I asked your father about his family medical history.”

“And what did he say?” 

“He said that a few people in his family had hearing loss. He said that people in his family started to go deaf in their late twenties and early thirties.”

“And what did you say?”

“I said, ‘We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it.’ What else was I going to say? I was already pregnant and I knew I wanted to have you.”

“So how did you feel when I started losing my hearing as a toddler?”

“I was concerned. I was really worried that you would have difficulty learning and making friends in school. What mother wouldn’t worry about that? Plus you were so young and you were still learning how to speak...”

“Did you ever wish that I wasn’t deaf?”

Robin hesitated to answer. She sniffled before replying, “Yes. There were times when I watched you struggle and I wished... I wished I could do more to help you. Everyone wants what’s best for their kid. And you were my baby. You still are my baby. There were times where I wished I had a magic wand I could wave that would give you your hearing back, but there wasn’t. So I had to learn how to help you in other ways.”

“And how did you do that?”

“First I had to learn to communicate with you better. We started learning sign language when you were about eight years old. Looking back, we really should’ve started sooner, but...” She paused to sigh. “We thought hearing aids would make everything better, but they didn’t. So once we realized that, we had to figure out something else that would work better. A friend of mine at work recommended ABC Languages to me. I signed the whole family up for lessons, and they really helped. Your dad and I also had tutors for you for school and after a lot of arguing with your school district, we got an interpreter to go with you to your classes. Do you remember her?”

“Yeah, I remember Miss Marie. So, is there anything you want to say to the people out of the internet?”

“If you want to be a parent, make sure you’re prepared for anything. You never know what your child will grow up to be. You just need to love them no matter what. And if your child has a disability, make sure you give them a little extra special care and be patient with them.”

Ace stopped the camera, then said, “That was very nicely said, Mom.”

“Thanks, Ace. I’m going to take this make-up off now.” 

Dad

The second interview was with his dad. His dad also worked a 9-5 job, so Ace decided to conduct his interview on the same day as his mom’s. After Robin was done, Tao swapped in. In hindsight, he probably should have interviewed his dad while his mom was getting ready to be on camera, but it was too late for that.

“Hello everyone, I am Tao. Thank you for having me on your show,” Tao said, smiling at the camera.

“Thanks for coming on. So, Dad, Mom told me that you knew that you had a family history of deafness when she was pregnant with me. Were you worried that I would go deaf?”

“My father started to lose his hearing when he was in his thirties, and my brother was in his late twenties. I knew it could happen, but... I don’t think I was fully prepared. Your mother was more prepared than I was. She already had your sisters when we got together, so she knew what raising children was like. I didn’t, at that point.”

“Can you talk about when you found out that I was losing my hearing and what your reaction was?”

“Sure. Your mom and I found out in 2002. You were in preschool and your teacher told us that you weren’t listening to her in class. We noticed that you would ask people to repeat themselves a lot. We took you to get a hearing exam and the doctor told us that you were starting to go deaf. I was in shock, honestly. Again, I wasn’t fully prepared. I thought that if it ever did happen, you would be an adult...”

“Did you ever wish I wasn’t deaf?”

“At first I did, but then I realized that it’s a part of you. I remember there was one day you came home from your sign language lessons and you were so excited to show us the new phrase you learned. You learned how to sign the word ‘proud.’ You signed, ‘I’m deaf, and I’m proud.’” Tao signed the phrase as he said it aloud. “You’re my kid, and I love you. All of you. Even when you don’t do the dishes when I ask you to.”

Ace chuckled at his dad’s quip. “So is there anything else you want to say to the people of the internet?”

“Always be proud of who you are, unless you’re a murderer. Then maybe not... And when your dad asks you to do the dishes, please just do them. It’s not that hard.” 

“Alright, I get it! I’ll do the dishes when I put my camera away!” he whined, pausing the recording. 

Chelsea

The last interview was with his sister, Chelsea. Chelsea was the most reluctant to participate in Ace’s project. He saved her interview for last because he wanted to make sure she was comfortable first. Ace conducted her interview about a week after his parents. 

“Can you introduce yourself to everyone?” Ace asked, turning the camera on. 

“I’m Chelsea.”

“And can you tell everyone what your relationship to me is?”

“I’m your older half-sister.”

“So, Chelsea, can you talk about what our relationship was like growing up?”

“It... wasn’t easy. It was mostly my fault, though. Abby and I were real jealous of you.”

Ace interrupted to clarify, “Abby is our eldest sister. She doesn’t live with us. Sorry, continue.” 

“Abby was ten when you were born, and I was eight. Neither of us really wanted anything to do with you. No offense. You kinda took all the attention away from us.”

“None taken. Do you think our relationship changed after I started losing my hearing?” 

“Between you and me? Not really. I was still jealous. I was kind of a little shit back then.”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I just kinda ignored you. You’d try to hang out with me and shit, but I never wanted to. You’d try to sign with me, but I never really paid attention in those ASL classes, so I didn’t even know what you were saying to me half the time. It was shitty.”

“When do you think we started getting close?”

“When you got your surgery for your implant.”

“Can you talk more about that?”

“Uh. Yeah. Sure. Well, you were thirteen, and I just turned twenty-one. I had my own shit going on back then and I was really only thinking about myself. But I just came back to town that week, and Mom wanted all of us to be there with you when you woke up. Looking at you in the hospital bed, seeing how small and vulnerable you were, something just clicked for me. I thought to myself, ‘I need to be a better sister. We’re family, we should be sticking together.’”

Ace felt himself tearing up when she said that. Chelsea struggled a lot with her mental health back then, so Ace was glad that she was finally able to talk about it to a degree. His relationship with his sister still wasn’t the strongest, but he was so glad to be getting closer to her as an adult. “So is there anything else you want to say to the people of the internet?”

“ACAB.”

Ace laughed as he stopped the camera. “Thanks, Chels. Fuck, I’m definitely gonna keep that part in there.” 

“You fuckin’ better.” 

#self para #Robin Horowitz #Tao Wong #Chelsea Cohen