As a reminder that good exists out there, a coworker recently confessed to me that he found out his child is questioning their identity (kid's gender redacted for this post). The kid is keeping it from him, so he can't say anything to them or show that he knows, but he's doing his best to get mentally prepared and educated so that he'll be ready whenever his kid does feel comfortable enough come to him.
For context, this guy is a big, bulky middle aged dude who loves sports and typical outdoor "manly" activities. As his coworker and friend, I know he's a kind and sweet teddy bear of a person, but his kid probably views him as a stern, authoritarian figure, the way most teenagers view their parents. His family lives in a conservative area, so I'm sure between that, their dad's looks and interests, and the fact that their dad is a Figure of Authority, the kid is worried that they won't be accepted.
But you know what? When he found out about his kid, the first thing he did was reach out to his closest queer friend and ask for resources for parents of questioning children. His biggest fears are that his kid will be bullied or discriminated against and won't feel comfortable enough to be themself. His second action was to find himself a mentor in another parent who went the same situation (kid coming out in a conservative town). The other person is preparing him for some of the struggles his kid may face and the fights he may need to take on as a parent to make sure his kid is safe and treated well.
Something I want to emphasize for people focused on language as the primary method of allyship is that when we spoke, he used some outdated terms and thoughts about gender and sexuality. That does not make him bad. These were the terms and thinking used about questioning teenagers when he was growing up and he never needed to learn more current ones. But now that he does have that need, he's throwing himself in head first because that's his kid and he's darn well going to make sure that his kid feels welcomed and has a safe place to be themselves even if they never come out to him.
34K notes
·
View notes
Netflix, I don’t know how to tell you this but a woman doesn’t have to be self taught to be a strong female character. It’s ok to let her know her limitation and ask for help. It’s ok to let her get angry, it’s ok to let her be jealous, it’s ok to let your female character have flaws and WORK on them. Your female character doesn’t have to become a master on her own to be memorable, it just makes her accomplishment feel unearned.
11K notes
·
View notes
I met an older nb queer (I estimate early 50s) at the club last night. It was a religious experience. We talked about mushrooms, AIDs, and Terry Gilliams movies.
They told me about identifying as a sissy when they were a kid because that was the only term they had for an effeminate man. We talked about gender and the way the world has changed then they passed me a very strong joint.
As the night wore on they leaned over and told me how good it was to meet a butch for the first time in a long time. They told me that when they were 16 and sneaking out of the house to go to gay bars the butches were the ones who took them in.
I had to hold back tears in the club.
There are futures for all of us. And if your future involves tophats with feathers, silly songs, and trippy jackets, then there's a future for you too.
16K notes
·
View notes
"Go to hell" is basic. "Hope your favourite anime movie sequel gets cancelled after seven years in production AND getting an animated teaser." is smart. It's possible. It's terrifying. It's happened.
7K notes
·
View notes
I love BG3 and have spent almost 200 hours in it since the EA release but good god I have zero will to finish Act 3…wish I could just rush to the ending but my brain does not let me leave side quests…suffering
0 notes
more sharp-toothed pomni shenanigans... this time, with weirdly specific projection [packaging... my sworn enemy]
7K notes
·
View notes