So, there’s some angst in here, if you want to call it that. I blow goats when it comes to angst so I genuinely apologize, but... here we are.
Also I’m sorry it’s late and short, and completely unedited. I’ve been battling a full array of... stuff for the last few months. So, this is what I managed to eek out this week.
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The lobby smelled of sterile, but stale, air, and also of sadness and despair.
...and death.
The lobby of the ER always seemed to have the faint smell of death that permeated everything.
His stomach twisted and turned as guilt rose into his throat, nearly strangling him of all the air in his lungs. It was as if Damian ran his hands down his thighs and he leaned forward, letting his head drop between his knees. His phone dangled in front of his face, and his thumb hovered over the “Empty Cart” button. He couldn’t look away from it - this cart filled with the best of everything.
For a child they would never have.
Ignoring the sensible part of his mind, Damian locked his phone and leaned back into the hard plastic chair. His head rested on his shoulders and he let go of a long, deep breath, as he stared at the ceiling. In the back of his mind, he imagined a little girl with the same soft smile as his wife, the same quiet giggle, the same deep midnight hair…
Shaking his head, Damian sat back up and opened his phone, hitting the “Empty Cart” button, and then cleared the notes app containing possible names. There was no use holding onto something that would never happen, and he felt guilty that he continued to try - over and over again. Raven had warned him when they had gotten married, and again after her first miscarriage, and again after she had gotten pregnant this time. She had warned him that there were still curses lingering inside her from her father, even though he had been defeated.
This was one of them.
His heart felt heavy, and he felt his hope dissolve into a thin layer of dust. He couldn’t keep doing this to her, and himself. That thick, poisonous feeling of guilt choked him again. He kept making her live this nightmare over and over, and everytime they had a thin ray of hope that maybe this time was different, only to be crushed again. Damian took a deep breath and let it escape. Tomorrow, he’d make an appointment for a vasectomy.
“Damian?”
He looked up to see Raven standing over him, looking as exhausted as ever. She was pale and drawn, and her hand ran along the length of her neck. Her eyes met his, and he watched shame fill her eyes before looking away. It felt as though all the eyes in the lobby were watching them and this private moment.
“We need to stop by the pharmacy on the way home.”
He nodded and stood up. Raven clutched her discharge paperwork, letting her head dip, as if she was trying to hide from the rest of the people in the lobby. With a soft sigh, she slipped her free hand into his. It was clammy and shaking, and Damian just wanted to hold her close until the rest of the world dissolved around them. He wanted her to know that he was here for her - no questions, no judgments. They stepped from the shadows of the ER into the brilliantly warm and sunny day. The kind of day where he would take her to the posh beach house down south, and just lounge around in the sun with her.
Instead, he was here. Grieving with her.
He glanced down into her face, seeing the sorrow draw lines across her forehead as she fidgeted with the ring on her finger. Damian raised her hand to his mouth and kissed her fingertips. “What can I-”
“I think we should-”
They both snapped their mouths shut, waiting for the other to speak. Damian nodded for her to go first, staying quiet. Raven looked into his eyes and then away, as she took a shaking breath, trying to find some kind of courage to speak.
“I think we should get a divorce.”
What.
What?
What the fucking Hell…?
He stood there, reeling. It felt like he was going to fall to the ground, her words scratching against his skin like claws dripping with poison. He blinked several times, trying to clear his head in a way that made no sense at all. His stomach rolled and twisted, and Damian took a deep breath trying to calm himself before his temper took hold. Pressing his lips in a firm line, he stopped walking and stared firmly into her eyes.
“Okay.” He cleared his throat and looked at Raven, firmly in her eyes. “Can you tell me why?”
She sighed and met his stare with one of sorrow and sadness, and resignation. As if this was somehow the only place her soul belonged. “You want a child, Damian. Progeny to carry on the world you’ve created and live in. You want something I am clearly unable to give you, no matter how many miracles we try. This is who I am - cursed and broken - and there’s nothing we can do to fix that. I can’t give you what you want.”
Damian let go of a breath he had forgotten he was holding, and a weak laugh escaped. Relief flooded his chest and he shook his head. “That’s it? That’s the only reason?”
Raven pursed her lips and stared at him. “What do you mean? The only reason? This is important to you.”
Damian stepped up to her and cupped her face tilting it up to his own, pressing his lips to her forehead. “First of all, my love, you are not cursed and broken, nor will you ever be. And if you call yourself that again, I promise to turn you over my knee and spank you.”
He felt a shiver run down her spine, and he smiled.
“Second of all, I want progeny - as you so tactfully put it - with you. Not anyone else. Only you. I love you, more than I have words to explain. A child is a gift and a blessing, but it’s not the only part of my love. I love your smile-” He kissed her lips softly. “-your laugh-” He kissed her again. “-the way you get so involved in books and magic-” He kissed both of her eyes. “-the way the world around you continues to fascinate you.” He kissed her forehead again. “I love the way you rise early and whisper things in my ear that you think I don’t hear-” She flushed and he kissed her cheeks. “-and the way you dance when you think no one is watching you.” She chewed on her lower lip, and Damian kissed her again. “I love everything about you, your womb is not paramount, I assure you.”
Raven opened her mouth to try and say something, but he cut her off with another kiss, his fingers curling into her hair as he deepened the kiss until she was gasping, clinging onto his shirt.
Damian pulled away and kissed along her jaw. “Besides… if you decide to leave me, I assure you that I will spend every hour of the rest of my life working to get you to come back to me.”
When he pulled away, he saw tears gathering in her eyes, and he knew that everything was going to be okay. They both needed to heal, to collect broken pieces of their hearts and mend them back together, but they would do that with each other. This was, first and foremost, a partnership, and he wanted no one else to be his partner.
He kissed her forehead again and took her hand. “Let’s get you home and order pizza, my love.”
She gave him another weak smile, but this time it reached her eyes. “You know just how to charm me.”
He opened his car door and helped her inside, a warm smile filling his face as he held her hand. “Yes. Because you are my wife, and my whole universe, my love.”
Raven just flushed and buried her face in her hands.
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DamiraeWeek2021
Day One: Family/In-laws
The Second Wayne Reunion
Damian tapped his fingers against the wheel.
“Anxious?” asked Raven.
“You know how last year turned out. I was surprised Father agreed to another reunion this year.”
One year ago, Dick had come up with the idea of having a family reunion. He had invited the whole Wayne family together under one roof once again. The results of the party didn’t end so well. Dick clearly wanted to make the reunions annual, because he once again invited everyone.
Damian took another left. They had to drive across Gotham to reach Wayne Manor. After getting married, he and Raven bought a stretch of land on the other side of Gotham. Together they designed their house and hired people to build it.
Damian let out a sigh. “That bastard, Grayson.”
“Language,” said Raven.
He glanced at the rear view mirror. Their daughter, Rashida, was asleep in the back. Although, she could be pretending. Rashida is an intelligent child, more mature than her actual age. However, she does tend to do dangerous things.
They pulled up at Wayne Manor at long last. Rashida woke up instantly.
“We're here!” she announced. The five year old got out of their car immediately to stretch her legs.
“Rae! Watch this!” shouted Mar’i. She flew up into the sky while Rae watched from the ground. Mar’i shot a green starbolt at a low cloud. The cloud lit up in green light before evaporating into thin air.
“Impressive,” commented Rae. She joined her cousin in the air. The two girls turned the clouds green and purple.
Sitting in deck chairs, Raven and Koriand’r watched the kids flying around.
“Did you teach her that?” questioned Raven.
Kori let out a laugh. “Of course not, Mar’i and Jacob discovered it. Speaking of Jacob, where is he?”
It was Raven’s turn to laugh. “I saw him with Jackson, they were building something out of Legos. How do you not know what your son is doing?”
“I’ve been very busy lately,” Kori defended herself.
“Hey sisters! Mind if I join you?” Stephanie didn’t wait for an answer, she took a seat in a chair across from Kori. “Cass and Babs will be here with the food in a few minutes.”
“Is Valkyrie joining us this year?” asked Kori.
“She sure is! Val better not drop out last minute,” said the blonde. “I can’t believe Dick allowed her to skip last year. I mean, like seriously? This is a family reunion and therefore Val can not be missing out.”
“She was on a mission,” said Raven. “Then again, you can’t blame her, this family can be quite a handful.”
“Makes me wonder how we are able to put up with them,” joked Stephanie.
-
“How’s the cooking going?” asked Raven.
Damian turned around to face his wife. “Fairly well,” he answered.
Raven nodded. She took in the scene. Pots and pans were on the stove. A large bowl of lettuce sat on the counter. Nearby stood a container of tofu, waiting to be opened.
“Where’s Richard? I thought he’d be cooking as well,” said Raven.
Damian let out a “tt”. He stirred the soup inside a large pot. “Grayson left an hour ago, he said something about napkins.”
“You do know that not everyone here is vegetarian, correct?” questioned Raven as she noticed that there wasn’t a single speck of meat in any of the dishes.
“I also know that they will have to pay for making me cook a meal for twenty people.”
“21, actually,” corrected Raven. “Valkyrie’s running late.”
“And there I thought she would skip like last year.”
Raven grabbed a spare apron. “I suppose it’s up to me to save everyone from eating tofu turkey tonight.”
“How heroic.”
-
“Mother? Father?” called Rashida.
“We’re in the kitchen, ibna,” answered Damian.
“What are you making?” Rashida stood on the tip of her toes and watched as Raven mixed together the stuffing for the turkey.
“Dinner. Would you like to help, love?” asked Raven.
“Actually I can not,” said Rashida.
“And why is that?”
“Mar’i and I are in need of some pots. We’re going to make popcorn the old fashioned way! But instead of making a fire, we’ll be heating it with our powers,” explained Rashida..
“Is anyone supervising you?” asked Damian.
“Of course, Uncle Jason’s helping us.” Rashida pulled a large pot out of the cabinet. “This will do perfectly,” she said. “Good luck on your cooking!”
“Should I be concerned that Jason is overseeing their popcorn-making?” asked Damian.
“You should have some faith in him,” said Raven.
-
“I think we’re done here,” said Raven.
Damian nodded. “This should be enough food for the whole family, including leftovers for everyone to take home.”
They have made a total of twelve different dishes, two-thirds of which are plant-based. Raven have also made five different types of pastries for dessert.
They left the kitchen to join the rest of the family in the living room. Selina was reading a book to her grandchildren. Rashida, however, was not with her cousins, she was throwing knives with her uncle. They took turns throwing from different positions, each time getting bullseye on the target board.
“Why couldn’t our daughter have some non-violent interests,” sighed Raven.
Damian smiled. “She’s the granddaughter of the first Batman and Trigon, and great granddaughter of Ra’s Al Ghul. And I should add that her adoptive grandfather also happens to be Superman. So I would say that throwing a few knives is perfectly fine.”
“I just want her to have a childhood full of peace and innocence, unlike ours,” Raven murmured.
“She is habibti, she is.” Damian held his wife close. They seated themselves on the couch and silently watched the scene before them.
The peace in the room could not be contained for long. Dick burst through the door holding a large bag.
“Guess what I got?” he sang.
Rashida didn’t even spare her uncle a glance. “A bag full of games,” she answered.
“Uh, yeah. Great guess, Rae,” stuttered Dick. It still intrigued him how she knew what was inside. Well she is her parents’ daughter.
Dick laid out the contents on the table. There was a wide variety of games from classic card games to Twister.
The doorbell rang as soon as he took out the last game.
“That must be Val!” Kori rose to answer the door.
A minute later, the said woman arrived in the room. She could’ve been a younger version of Cassandra, except her features are more sharp. The youngest of the Wayne siblings, Valkyrie was adopted at the age of thirteen. That was ten years ago.
She came just like her oldest adoptive brother, holding a large bag. All the kids, including Rashida, ran over to see what was inside.
“Alright, settle down first,” Valkyrie said. She pulled out four colorfully wrapped boxes and handed one to each of the kids.
Mar’i opened her box and gasped in surprise. “Thank you so much Aunt Val! They’re beautiful.” The twelve year old has received silver bracelets, similar to her mother’s, but with detailed markings on them.
When Jackson opened his box, his jaw dropped. Inside was a Build-Your-Own 3-Dimensional Holographic Projector. “Thank you Aunt Val!” said the eight year old.
Jacob’s gift was eight limited edition action figurines. “How did you-? How is this-?” The boy was so shocked to see eight expensive figurines, that were probably worth a hundred dollars each, in front of him.
“I have my ways, little one,” answered Valkyrie.
“Thank you so much,” he said, giving Valkyrie a big hug.
“Your welcome, and please I’d like some personal space.”
Rashida slowly opened her box. Inside was a white cloak. The fabric was quite unusual. It was soft, stretchy, thin, and light. Yet the fabric also felt strong, and sturdy. The bright ruby glowed in the golden clasp. Unlike Raven’s cloak, this one had sleeves. The hems and cuffs of the cloak were embroidered with intricate designs. Rashida slipped on the cloak, it fitted perfectly. “Thank you, Aunt Valkyrie,” said the five year old.
“There are no gifts for your siblings? Wow, how kind of you,” spoke up Jason.
Valkyrie smiled. “Of course not, only ones for the kids,” she pulled out two more boxes, “and the parents.”
Selina and Bruce gave her their thanks then proceeded to open their gift. Silent received a full set of cat themed jewelry, while Bruce received a grey tie.
“I actually needed a new tie,” he said.
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