#deanxcas ficlet

[wheniwrite28]

More than a little Dead- 13.05 CODA

He is trying to save people, he tells himself before Dean plunges the syringe in his heat. And he does help people. Billie may be the new Death but he still doesn't get the full picture. She may have all the possibilities of how Dean Winchester dies, broken heart was not one of them. He wants to shout that he is slowly but irrevocably dying of a broken heart. 

***

Dean comes back to life and all those ghost find their way out of the veil. He feels awful, another innocent life lost. But more than that he feels for the mother, those who have been left behind. The grief of surviving sometimes is so much worse than grief of losing a loved one. 

Sam wants to make sure he is okay and he had tried really hard. He does but Sam doesn't get that he can be okay one way and that is not possible for anyone, anyone to make it right. 

“Are you okay?” Sam asks, he wants to reaffirm that he is okay, that he won't go plunging death syringes in his heart. 

“I am not okay, I am pretty far from okay.” Dean replies honestly. He thinks to maintain a facade- it requires too much energy, that he doesn't really have. 

***

They are on their back to the bunker, when his phone rings. He wants to throw that thing outta the window, but instead, he picks up.

There is a little bit of static that comes, before he hears the words that he knew he will never hear again. What is burnt, stays dead or so he thought,

“Dean, hello.” He can’t say anything. he is stupefied. 

“I am at a pay phone,” Cas, oh how much he wanted to use that name in normal context, just in a conversation, not out of anger, frustration or regret, pauses and tells him the location.

Sam wakes up and ask who is it. Dean brain has only one thought that goes, GET TO CAS, rendering anything else useless.

He gets there, they get there. The world silences itself.

Cas turns, Dean, heart flutters for the first time. Beating to live, not to just be. 

***

Later they are at the bunker, Cas trying to get to his room. Dean stopping him, holding on to his wrist. Taking him inside, his room. Asking him to stay. 

Cas squinting to understand what does he mean. 

He pulling Cas towards the bed, he snuggling closer to Cas. His heartbeat steadying, matching the rhythm of Cas. Finally. 

#destiel coda 13.05 #coda 13.05 #destiel #destiel ficlet #DEANCAS #cas dean #deanxcas #deanxcas 13.05 coda #deanxcas ficlet #deancas coda 13.05 #deancas fluff #deancas hug

[angel-wings-and-tattoos]

simply thinking about how dean and castiel didn't have a single moment of peaceful happiness for eleven years straight. every time anything actually good happened to either of them it was only a matter of time before they got separated again.

two men who were devoted to each other in the worst way either of them could imagine: castiel, an angel of the lord, not meant to feel human emotion or stray away from heaven's orders, and dean, raised to be a solider, his only job to protect sam and kill beings who aren't human, not risk his own life and the world for one of those exact beings.

these two men who deserved nothing more than to just exist alongside each other, together and alive, and instead lost each other over and over and over and over again without a reprieve from that cold feeling in your chest that never really goes away.

these two men who spent more time worrying about and grieving each other than being happy.

these two men who contradicted the universe's path to keep choosing each other above all else, even the plan that god himself was enforcing on them.

for eleven years they were somehow the most and least connected to each other as they could possibly be- their very beings intertwined yet they still managed to keep staying away again and again.

in the end, castiel finally confessed his feelings and lost everyone he loved in doing so. dean never got the chance to respond and died blaming himself for every single time he ever lost castiel, especially that last goodbye they shared.

and yes, maybe dean and castiel reunited in heaven and finally figured it all out; however, the story that is laid out in front of us ends there. two lovers who were so unconditionally devoted to each other but were never quite in sync enough to understand what the other one felt. an ending that doesn't feel right. disconnected from the rest of their entire storyline, yet somehow also fits right in with the history of bad luck and devastation that has followed the two of them around from day one.

looking at it from the outside makes it appear like they were never meant to be happy at all, no matter how desperately the two of them wanted to be.

#destiel #deanxcas #deancas #dean winchester #jensen ackles #misha collins #supernatural #castiel novak #castiel #not going to lie this one hurt my own feelings #destiel fic #spn #i'm honestly sorry about this one #it's 1 am and i couldn't get this out of my head #archive of our own #dean winchester/castiel #jack kline #sam winchester #ali's ficlets

[hily-shot]

Can I get uhhhhhhhhhh fluffy Valentine's day Destiel? Maybe some hurt comfort? To fill my empty heart? Or maybe some Klance? That would work just as well

#destiel #deanxcas #valentine's day #fluffy #ficlet #writing #hurt/comfort #please #someone #anyone #i'm lonely #lance #Keith #klance #voltron #supernatural #Dean Winchester #castiel Novak #lance McClain #keith kogane

[themoonandotherslikeit]

Drunk Drabbles & Ficlet Masterlist 

This is a place where I write things while drinking and answer Ficlet requests. They’re small, but cute! Enjoy! 

CasxCharlie WINE

DeanxReaderxSam Naughty Thanksgiving

DeanxReader Sex Toys

DeanxReader Rain Kiss

Demon!DeanxCas Karaoke 

DeanxReaderxSam- “Get up Princess, you’ve got work to do.” 

Destiel Record Store AU 

DeanxDrunk!Reader Hook Up

JackXLord Tyrion 

NSFW Dean

Dean’s Favorite Moments based on @smol-and-grumpy​‘s fic Dear Dean read it NOW. 

NatxDean Shopping for PANTIES

#drunk drabbles #supernatural #spn #masterlist #ficlets #fanfiction #fic #supernatural fanfiction #spn fanfiction #spn fic #writing #mine

[verobatto]

I had to write this. Sorry. English is not my native language and I don't write novels or fic in English neither. But I just had to write this and share in this beautiful community. I'm new in this fandom. I write things sometimes since I can remember. It was kind of difficult translate my ideas in this language but I did it... Not so we'll but... I tried hahahaaaaaaaaa.

Sorry if anyone already wrote about this. Is just me thinking about what if Mildred met Cas. Or... What if she discovered that Cas is Dean's pinning object?

I don't know if this is a FF... Or a ficlet? one shot? Maybe I could make a second act...? I don't know.

Is after Dean's possession. So... I hope you enjoy it!

PS: @lovemesomecas94 I was about to write this in my lenguage... But I was brave and I encouraged myself to write in English! Is in ao3 too under my alter ego BENKA79! (I don't know how to put the URL hahahaaaaaaaaa I'm a disaster!)

Title: LOVE IS SCARY.

Pairing: DeanxCas

Tv show Supernatural FF

I don't own this characters.

Advertisement: None.

Chapter: 1/?

Act 1

Dean went straight to say hello to Mildred. She was so happy to see him again.

-Well... Look at you! You look so handsome as always.-she said checking him out. Dean chuckled and gave him a hug. She accepted it with playful joy. -Why are you here?-she asked later a little intrigued.

-Well have a case around here so... We came to visit you. How have you been?-said Dean, with a fondly tone. She smiled.

-Oh. Bored. But fine. You brought your brother with you?-

-Yes. He is over there making some questions.-And Dean pointed to the left. Sam was talking with some neighbors.

She looked at Dean again... With sassy eyes.

-So Dean... Did you tell that special girl about your feelings for her?-she asked all of the sudden. It took Dean for surprise. He was frozen. His eyes wide open and his mouth was petrified. Mildred was waiting for the answer. It was then when Cas arrived.

-Dean. Maybe I had collected some good information.- Dean was blinking awkwardly. Cas tilted his head looking at him with curiosity.-Is everything ok?- he asked when Mildred couldn't stop checking the angel out with amazed eyes. Cas noted her and cleared his throat. Then he begun to introduce himself. :-Hello. My name is Castiel. You should be Mrs. Mildred. Is a pleasure to meet you.- he said extending his hand for a friendly shake. But Mildred choosed grab Castiel's biceps.

-Wow. You are so gorgeous. Where were you all this time? The Winchester brothers had you hidden. You look beautiful as an angel. And hot.- She winked at him. Cas tilted his head kind of surprised. He was about to talk but Dean went out from his frozen status.

- He is... He is our best friend... Castiel. And... He is an angel indeed... A real one.-he said fondly. Mildred looked at Dean with curiosity. Then she smiled as if her mind had discovered a secret.

Cas smiled lightly to Mildred. She squeezed Castiel's biceps then released it.

-Oh... I see. Is wonderful to meet you Castiel. Since when have you been protecting the Winchestes?- then Mildred saw how Cas looked at Dean with sparkles in his eyes. But she saw the same sparkles in Dean's eyes. And he was returning his gaze to Cas.

-Ahm...-said Cas:- Ten years.- Mildred smiled.

-That is a long time.- she said.

Dean stared at Cas and could see that beautiful side smile growing in his best friend's lips. He blushed a little. Mildred was watching this interactions all the time.

-Yes... Long time... -said Cas. Still smiling:-Well... We can talk later about the data I collected. I'm gonna help Sam with the neighbors.- and then Cas walked away from there.

Dean was starting at him with a stupid smile in his face. Mildred laughed. Then Dean woke up and cleared his throat.

-What?-he said with discomfort... She looked at him suspicious.

-Is not a she.- she said. Dean blinked again and tried to look normal.

-What... Ehm... What do you mean?-

-The person you are pinning for...-Mildred said with certain.:-It's him.- she ended, pointing with her head in Cas's direction. Dean blinked nervously and he straightened in his posture. Looking sideways awkwardly. Mildred smiled:-Why are you so nervous? To love someone is wonderful. Did you tell him?- Dean looked at her. He was afraid. No one ever have been so direct about it. Was he so obvious? Should he say it to Mildred? Yes... He was pinning for this nerdy, dorky, little guy. But he was so scared about his own feelings for Cas. He had just knowledged when he was possessed by Michael. He could eject that son of a bitch thanks to his strong feelings for Castiel. Of course... Nobody knew it. Just Dean. And he was so terrified about it. Still... He was a coward. This discovery was new for him. He always thought he was a ladies man. So sure about his conquer skills. But he had fell for this beautiful Angel in this handsome vessel. And he was a man. Well... Kind of... How could that be possible?

Dean had been staring at Cas all that time. Damn he was like a wonderful apparition. Mildred observed. Dean wasn't staring at the angel. He was contemplating him. Suddenly, Dean spoke:

-I'm afraid.- Mildred chuckled.

-Sure you are. Love is scary. But... You know what?-she asked smiling:- It worth it.- Dean looked at her with a frowned expression.-You deserve to be happy. To be loved. And that beautiful angel over there... He loves you.- Dean's eyes widened in surprise. Mildred noted that:- Don't you know that? Well...-she sighed:-I can tell you that. He was sparkling by your side.- Dean blinked and looked at Castiel. The angel was watching him and feeling catched, he look away quickly.:-Wow...- Mildred continued amused:- Somebody was caught watching.- Dean swallowed. He was like dreaming. Could it be...? Could it be Cas felt the same way? His heart was racing so strongly... His ears felt on fire.- Dean. Tell him.- Mildred finished. She kissed his cheek affectionately and went to say hi to Sam.

Now Dean was more terrified that before. What if... Was just her impression. And Cas didn't... But what if he did? Yes. This doubt was more terrifying that the idea of a one sided love. He could be the most brave hunter in the entire world. He could stop any apocalypse in any dimension... But he just couldn't say that scary "L" word to Cas. No way. He shaked his head and started to walk towards baby.

#destiel ff #my writing #english is not my first language #i'm sorry

[thewhiterabbit42]

January Gabriel Monthly Challenge

January Gabriel Monthly Challenge @gabriel-monthly-challenge  @ashiewesker @lacqueluster or @waterkiss37

Prompts: One day you and I are gonna wake up and be alright. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but one day. I promise you.

When you least expect it sometimes you get saved.  (future parts)

Title: Full Circle

Pairings: GabrielxSister!Reader, mentions of DeanxCas

Tags: angst, humor, romance

Rating: M for language, beginnings of (but no actual) smut

Word Count:  30k total - divided into 5 parts

Summary:  When a strange occurrence leads you back to Indiana, you find the past becomes resurrected along with a certain archangel.  Unfortunately, you both become caught up in something bigger than you expected.  Takes place between Seasons 5 and 6.  

Link to Fic: http://archiveofourown.org/works/9547214/chapters/21585491

Author’s Note:  My spirit animal is the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland because I am perpetually late.  Apologies to the mods and I hope I’m close enough to the cut off!

What was supposed to be a little oneshot, turned into a ficlet, which turned into this idea to create a universe which I would use for subsequent monthly challenges in 2017.  So this is the universe.  Part 1 ended up a little reader heavy but in my defense, it takes some time to resurrect an archangel.  He’s in the rest, promise.  It became something even larger than expected so the last 1-2 parts will be posted over the next few weeks as they are finished.    

While I’ve been writing for years, this is the first fic I’ve ever posted.  Thanks in advance for any feedback!

Special thanks to @omgreganlove for being the beautiful, kind, and encouraging lady she is, for letting me bounce ideas off her, and for not setting me on fire after agreeing to beta a oneshot and ending up with this.  Thanks for doing what you could.  This wouldn’t have happened without you!  

#Apologies if this posted 80 times #Why does tumblr hate me this morning

[weddinglock]

Cosmos

Destiel fluff fic for the wonderful Phoebe. So sorry for the delay but I swear this was your birthday present! Enjoy ^.^

                Cas remembered what Dean had told him about snowflakes. Well, Cas remembered most of what Dean said to him but that’s beside the point. Dean had one time informed him that every snowflake is completely different.

“None of them are the same?” he had asked wide eyed. Heaven didn’t tell him things like this. He had been farther in the solar system than anyone on earth ever would, but he still listened entranced as Dean would tell him about stars already being dead by the time the light reached earth, and how no one knew where black holes led.  Snowflakes were sort of like people, comparatively short lives, completely unique, and able to work the hardest when united. This is what Cas is thinking about when the bunker door squeaks open.

                “Cas! There you are! I’ve been looking for you everywh-hey what the hell man! It’s snowing and you don’t even have shoes?”  Dean cries hurrying over. Ca squints down at his bare feet, which now that Dean had mentioned them were actually really really cold.

“I uh, wanted to watch the snow.” He says, still looking down. Dean’s face softened.

“Well come watch it inside, you’ll freeze!” he says. And then as if it’s instinct he puts his hand on Cas’s arm. The angel’s head snaps up in surprise. Dean was never much for affection and for him at least this hand-on-arm thing was downright intimate. But Cas laughs because what he sees is Dean’s forehead all scrunched up as if the hunter didn’t really know why he had done that. Dean clears his throat and nods to the bunker door and, still smiling, Cas shuffles inside.  The air in the bunker was warm and swirled around Cas, making his previously exposed limbs tingle as they warmed back up.

“Help me make breakfast, Sam’s out running.” Dean calls over his shoulder, already on his way to the bunkers kitchen. Cas walked slowly behind him watching as he disappeared around the corner.  Dean can explain the universe to an angel. He thought smiling a little. He was shook from his reverie when he heard the radio click on.

Wheel in the sky keeps on turnin’

When Cas comes into the kitchen he’s taken aback for a minute. Dean in his blue bed robe humming softly to the song. The way he moved about the kitchen was almost lyrical, a dance and a floating maneuver all at once. He was- well, he was captivating. Dean was pulling milk out of the fridge when he froze and slowly turned on his heel.

“Look man, I know it’s a show but I could really use some help.” The hunter says, giving of all things a wink. Heat rushes to Cas’ face as he realize he had literally just been sitting there staring.

“I uh, right yeah, what do you need me to do?” He stammers.

 Making eggs is not a thing of import. It is not special or exciting. But doing it with Dean added a whole new chain to their intertwining story. No killing, no dragging out of hell. Domestic bliss was the term. The two unlikely companions made making scrambled eggs sacred. Anyone watching would have noticed the bumps of hands causing heat to rush to faces, small smiles shared in moments of contempt silence. A small dance of two entities just missing their orbital paths. Cas had been cutting peppers when he’d turned to wash off his knife. At the same moment Dean had been turning to grab some spices and before they could stop their momentum they’d crashed into each other, the knife clattering to the floor. Cas’ hands braced themselves on Dean’s surprisingly strong chest, and Dean an put both on hands on the angel’s shoulders to keep him upright. A little frazzled Cas glances up to apologize but Dean tweaks his mouth up into a smirking smile. Cas blinks as he looks at Dean’s face, noticing the freckles and the sharp curve of his jaw and how, the most surprising of all, Dean wasn’t letting go. Castiel’s eyes held so much wonder Dean just stared. The color was blue but not quite the normal shade. They were the color of a darkening sky, or of the ocean after a storm, strong and dangerous and intricately beautiful. With sudden realization Dean removes his hands and takes a half step back. Clearing his throat he awkwardly looks away from Cas’ gaze.

“Be uh, be more careful.” He says turning back to the cabinet so Cas wouldn’t see the blush slowly working its way up his cheeks. Cas smiles at the ground, a small smile that Dean misses, which was probably for the best  because Cas’ cheeks felt warm too.  

Breakfast was almost as nice to eat as it was to make. Sam ate more than they bargained for having returned from his run, but the two had made extra just in case. Kevin had woken up in time to join them too and it was all laughter and smiles from there.

 The day dragged slowly like any other normal day. Sam was busy reading some novel he’d found, Kevin was studying for a college exam and Dean busied himself work on the Impala in the garage. Sometime that afternoon Cas had slipped in and just sat watching him. But Dean didn’t chase him away or even mind. They just sat in companionable silence both thinking things they were glad the other couldn’t hear.  Toeing the line of friendship is never easy. Dean knew this, Cas could guess besides his lack of experience, and the result was a tension neither of them could tell if they minded or not.

                After dinner of Chinese take-out Sam stretches his long limbs and claims fatigue before retiring to his room. Kevin hadn’t even eaten but had crashed around four from staying up so long cramming. The bunker was quiet and peaceful and after finishing the dishes Dean makes his way into the living room. A little fire is burning in the fireplace and Cas is on the couch, feet tucked up and his chin resting on his knees. The angel had found one of Sam’s ipods he used for running and a song Dean barely recognized as Saturn by Sleeping At Last was playing quietly in the background.

                “This is some real hippie crap Cas.” Dean says laughing softly. Cas looks up startled from his glazed trance focused on the fire.

“Dean ,I didn’t even hear you come in.” he said, blue eyes reflecting the firelight in a way that made the ocean look like it was on fire and was also, Dean found himself thinking, maddeningly beautiful. The song playing was slow and had small crescendos of violin and cello and Dean felt his mind at an impasse. For a second he found himself toeing the line again, the secret is that usually on the other side of the line is usually a cliff, one that pulls you down hard and fast and Dean was debating whether he could handle the fall. Cas looked up at him with a small smile and everything was clear. Who the hell was he kidding? He’d fallen anyway. So in two quick steps Dean walks over to the couch and reaches out a hand.

“May I have this dance?” he says, winking again.

“What? Dean I, I don’t, I can’t dance.” Cas sputters, taken aback at how suddenly things had just changed.

“Come on princess, it’s easy. Just follow my lead.” Dean purrs and damn he was endearing. It takes two to fall in the end. There were no choirs singing when Cas reached up and tentanivily takes the calloused hand Dean was offering. There were no fireworks or frozen moments in time but Cas would never ever forget the way he felt the universe had shifted into alignment, or how he slotted against Dean and they fit like two broken puzzle pieces. He’d never forget the way Dean’s eyes reflected the fire like a green canopy letting out light or how his face had a constellation of freckles. Similarly, Dean would never forget the way Cas’ jaw had clenched when he had pulled him in close, or how it had gone slack when he whispered in Cas’ ear to ’relax’. He’d never forget the ocean look of pure adoration or the fear threatening lamely in his veins, setting them on fire. There were not enough moments to explain their infinite.  Dean pulled Cas’ hand up in the air and guided the angels other one onto his shoulder. Placing his unoccupied hand on Cas’ hip he nodded to let the other man know they were going to start.

Moving in time with Dean was like moving in time to the wind. The melody wrapped itself around them, lending them gentle steps and swaying emotions.  Dean took small steps this way and that, but he did it slow so Cas could keep up. After awhile Cas felt like he didn’t need to watch his feet as much and looked up. A little gasp of air caught in his throat as he met Dean’s gaze. Cas had known Dean a very long time. He had seen many emotions in the hunter’s eyes; desperation, pain, anger, but nothing compared to this. This was raw and pure and just for him. The angel suddenly became aware of his button-up being a little too scratchy and Dean’s cotton tshirt looking a little too tight on his muscular shoulders. Dean Winchester you are beautiful. He thought. To his surprise Dean laughed. Heat immediately rushed p to his face and he stammered quickly.

“I’m sorry I meant to keep that in my head I-” never has an interruption been so sweet. Dean catches the words falling from his mouth with his own, pressing his lips softly to Cas’. If he was surprised it didn’t register long because nothing would ruin this moment. Dean had moved his hand up and was holding Cas’ face as he tilted in to kiss him harder. With a little whine Cas kisses him back like he was a drowning man and Dean was air. Cas pushes his hands to Deans chest as Dean digs his hands into the angels soft brown hair.

“Fuck Cas, you’re beautiful.” Dean says and Cas can feel the hunter’s smile against his own. As if a switch flips Cas pulls Dean in closer and kisses him harder than before. He begins taking slow steps forward, forcing Dean back. The music in the background purrs on and if it was alive it certainly would have been enjoying the show. Dean feels the back of his knees hit the couch and doesn’t resist when Cas pushing him down into it. Cas put a knee on either side of Deans hips and smiles, looking down at the perfect man with only one though. Mine. Dean grabs his tie and pulls him back down kissing him tenderly on the corner of his mouth then trailing kisses down his jaw. Nothing would ever ever come close to as perfect as this. Cas had seen the cosmos, the creation of earth, and nothing woud compae to the beauty of this moment with Dean.  Eagerly, Cas catches Dean’s bottom lip again and laughs as Dean’s hand tightens on his tie. When they break for air Dean smiles, a little breathless, up at the angel. His angel.

“Fuck Cas, remind me to do that again.”

“Don’t worry;” Cas laughs, “you won’t have to.”

                After they’d kissed for what seems like minutes but could have been years, Cas had yawned and then literally curled up in Dean’s lap and fallen asleep. The fire had long since died o a faint blue flame and the room was bathed in long shadows. The music had ended after the song but the silence was heavy but comfortable. With his hands slowly combing out the knots in Cas’ hair, Dean had drifted slowly off into the first dreamless sleep he’d had in months.

Sam was exhausted as he went to get a glass of water. The light from the kitchen still on made him a bit suspicious.

“Dean?” he said poking his head around the corner to the living room.

“Dean di-“ he was stopped short by what he saw. Splayed on the coach was Dean, fast asleep with a hand in Cas’ hair whilst the angel was curled up head on his chest on top of him. If there was ever an award for shit-eating grins Sam won it as he ran up the stairs in his socked-feet and opened Kevin’s door.

“Kevin. Kevin!” he hissed.

“Dude what?” Kevin growls, rubbing his eyes and sighing as he looks at the clock on his bedside table.

“You owe me ten bucks I swear to god.” Sam says laughing.

“No, no way. You’re joking.” Kevin whispers.

“I kid you not.” Sam says quietly throwing his hands up to make his point. Motioning to Kevin they sneak out of his room and down the steps of the bunker.

                When they get to the ground floor Kevin see’s exactly what Sam means.

“Shit I thought it would at least be another month.” He grumbles handing over the money.

“You don’t have to live with him.” Sam laughs as he puts the bill in his pajama pants pocket.

“Yeah whatever. Let them sleep.” Kevin says over his shoulder throwing his hand up dismissively.

And all was quiet again. 

#destiel #deanxcas #deanxcas ficlet #destiel ficlet #deanxcas fic #destiel fic #kayl writes #phoebae #spn #fanfiction

[wheniwrite28]

13.01 Coda- Grief

Dean knows how grief works, and he has been through enough deaths of loved ones to push past it. This, he doesn't know how to.

He is kneeling besides Cas, his feathers, imprinted on the ground. The time is standing still. He is there for how long, he doesn't know. He gets up when the sun has already risen.

His only thought remains- kill what Killed Cas. Since killing Lucifer is impossible right now, kill the next best thing. The nephilim. He goes inside the house ready to shoot and he does that. He does that with a problem, but the nephilim escapes, Sam is trying to tell him, they can't subject the world to Jack's power or nephilim or whatever. He doesn't care anymore.

He carries Cas inside, Sam tries to help, but this burden is his. And he knows he needs to do this. Cas is immobile, of course he is ducking dead. He can't lash out now, he is carrying Cas and so silent tears fall out of his eyes.

Gently, he lays down Cas on the table, and covers him with a sheet, and he covers his face. It is real, it has been god knows how many hours but Cas is not waking up fuck. Fuck.

***

He prays to God when Sam is trying to figure out where Jack is, he prays, he prays to Chuck to bring Cas back, to bring all of them back. He needs him back, he doesn't know how to process this goddamn hurricane of grief. This is new, entirely too new. Because now he has no hope. Punching things, killing things, hunting, not is helping.

***

Jack is a baby and a teenager. He doesnt care anymore. Sam says we need to keep him and Dean is okay, as long as he has only them to hurt, he will take it. He deserves it. After how he is also responsible for Cas dying. He will take this punishment. Is this how people die of a broken heart, he wants to ask is this how people can die of a broken soul.

***

The pyre is ready, and Cas has been laid on it, Sam and Jack are standing besides it. Jack looks utterly confused and sad but Dean doesn't care. He sort of musing that he has been hurt, knuckles, eyes, lips. He doesn't feel it. The only pain remains is in his heart.

Sam tells him that we say thank you to the people and we hope they are in a place where there is no sadness or pain. We say goodbye.

Dean stands besides Sam and he says his final good bye. He opens the lighter, waiting a few seconds, maybe a miracle will finally happen. Nothing, he throws the lighter in frustration.

And he watches his heart, his soul and the angel he loved more than his life but never told him, burn.

***

Dean knows how grief works but if this what really grief is, then death seems like a easier solution. Because now he knows he has nothing to lose.

#13.01 coda #destiel #deancas #deancas fanfic #deancas ficlet #destiel ficlet #deanxcas ficlet #destiel fanfic #destiel season 13

[wheniwrite28]

The search of a heart to find a home

This is still new for them, to wait for 30 odd years to now, when they have their soul mates. Dean often catches wishful glances from Cas and sometimes he wonders how is any of this real.

Their first date has been a disaster and they are still trying to find some footing in each other's life. Although Dean was right, Cas is a librarian, the new librarian of their school.

It is strange to go from never meeting your soulmate to see them very day. "Dean, you are staring again," Cas chuckles.

The staring has gotten better or at least he think it has. But whatever, it maybe, he loves that Cas is here. That weird naked dude is almost chill for him.

They have to find their hearts to find the place which they will call home. It is strange that Dean had never felt home in his life, he knows the feeling for all intends and purpose he did have a home. But it had stopped felling like one at 18. It is when most of people found homes and their soulmates. Maybe home is more than just a  place.

Cas is already in the passenger seat and Dean too shakes himself out of this line of thought and drives them. The hearts will call to them, most people tell them that. They have to hold each other or touch some way and the call will come by itself.

“Dean,” Cas murmures, holding on to Dean’s shoulder, the skin beneath his hand throbs. It feels Cas’s hand is getting tattooed on to his skin. The imprint of their bond.

“Cas,” He acknowledges what is happening. Sam had commented that Dean and Cas could communicate without speaking. Even though they had known each other for a very little while. World is simultaneously really cruel and extraordinarily sweet to have given Cas and Dean finally a chance.

The heart beats increase when the proximity to their true home increases, most people get places where they already live or their soulmates live. He wonders if it would be the case with them. In the distance they can see a oak tree. 

“I think we are here, Dean,” He loves when Cas says his name in his gravely voice. It makes him feel special. A bit more than normal. As if his name has new meaning all of sudden.

There is an oak tree and a forest accompanying that. “I think our hearts have steered us wrong,” Dean grumbles, he knew he will have some bad luck in the situation.

“I don’t think so, let’s get out of the car,” Cas says and leaves. Not waiting to see if Dean follows. Maybe he will follow. He knows that most likely he will.

Cas is look at the trunk fascinated, and Dean sees it too. A marking made with knife, he remembers. 

There are only two words- Home- Dean. He remembers the time when he was 12 and had wandered here from the community park and felt at ease, looking at this tree. 

“Maybe we are thinking this wrong, Dean. Maybe our home is where we are,” Cas hugs him from behind.

“Maybe,” Dean turns his head and kisses Cas’s cheek. A bit of love, a bit of heart and finding home.  

@lunarxylop (Thanks for looking forward to this story, it has made me write some more of it)

#destiel #destiel soulmate au #The search of a heart to find a home #deancas #deanxcas #deanxcas ficlet #dances ficlet #destiel ficlet #destiel fluff #destiel au

[wheniwrite28]

Pressure 13.03 Coda

It builds up. Adds up to the already shit ton of grief he is going through. When Sam told him that Jack is messed up, he couldn’t agree more. Jack did mess up Dean’s whole life. He didn't even know how much he wanted that life, till it was taken away from him.

Sam mentioned Mary’s choice anyhow she decided to kick Lucifer’s ass. He forgot that what, who really mattered more. Significantly more. But maybe for Sam, it is the same loss. The same feeling of grief.

Dean, on the other hand, is too full, the pressure on his heart, making his heartbeat slow and heavy at the same time. He shouts about the injustice that the universe did to him, how Jack manipulated Cas with thoughts of paradise. Of the world that was too good to be true.

What is this world without Cas, how can anything be paradise, how could anything be of any meaning if Cas is not there for Dean. How can Sam forget that. Why can’t Sam understand that this is different?

“I can’t,” Dean shouts, and all the pressure makes his wall crumble, the heart leaks of unavoidable grief. He thinks, how can you not understand, I relive every moment of Lucifer stabbing Cas, how the light blinded him and he couldn’t save one person deserving of to be save.

No, Sam, you don’t get it. It hurts. It is too much. I am drowning and every time I see Jack, I see Cas and I see how much I failed him. Jack is the constant reminder that he is here and Cas is not. So, yes, I hate him and I can’t look at him. I am a husk of muscle and blood. My soul is lost, just like Cas is lost to me.

There is no coming back from that. 

***

Jack listens to how much Dean hates him, hates how he was born. But underneath all the hate, he feels the sadness, the ache of losing his adoptive father. He murmurs, “Castiel” as his powers flare, pencil mayn't have moved, the soul of Castiel does.

***

Castiel opens his eyes, a longing in his heart and a calling of his name. A nightmare lost, an empty slate seen. 

#castiel #dean winchester #destiel #destiel coda #13.03 #13.03 coda #spn 13.03 coda #destiel 13.03 coda #deancas #deanxcas #destiel ficlet #dances ficlet #deanxcas ficlet

[wheniwrite28]

The Curious Case of Being Famous

So, before this ficlet starts, I just wanted to say, I love the idea that Cas is not well versed with human beings that he can spill something without intending to and Dean may facepalm himself but still love Cas, his blubbering idiot and all. Also- It is an interview kind of fic.

They are going on stage for the first time since they got married, becoming famous as the first openly queer Human-Angel couple. They had not wanted the fame or the notoriety, just wanted to live their simple life, hunting things, saving lives, the family business. 

The host is called Al and his show was the only one they agreed to as Al was also openly bisexual and had been kind and curious, rather than rude and persistent. His softness had won them over.

“Ladies and Gentleman and all those creatures that go bump in the night and some stray angels, I welcome all of you to this wonderful segment call, unholy matrimony. We have with us, Dean Winchester, hunter extraordinaire, the righteous man  and the man behind the creation of Hunter’s Help Hotline along with his Angelic partner, Castiel Winchester, once was a god, and the one who gripped Dean tight and raised him from perdition,and lastly a bee farm owner” Al announces.

Dean and Cas make way to the sofa which is in shape of a giant heart, the only red in the otherwise neutral room. Al is sitting behind as a desk that is seems like mahogany in color, and a simple chair. It is contrasted by Al wearing a white suits having hearts on them. Dean and Cas are dressed rather demurely, Dean wearing a charcoal grey suit and Cas opting for a dark navy with a green tie. Dean is not wearing a tie but has a blue colored pcoket handkerchief.

They adjust themselves on the sofa, instead of taking opposite ends of it, they sit side by side, Dean holding on to Cas’s hand. 

“Welcome both of you and I can’t thank you enough for joining my show today, I can’t believe I have you here. Before I gush anymore, tell me how does it feel to being here?”

Dean smiles and waits, Cas to answer.

“Dean and I are happy to be here. I knew it was important for him and how could I refuse him if this made me content,” Castiel concludes Dean can see the Cas’s honestly will be the death of him. He sighs and takes Cas’s hand and kisses the back of his hand.

“What about you Dean, how do you feel to be here?” Al askes

“I dunno man, I never thought I would be here, alive and kicking. Answering questions for a tv show. I always thought happiness was not in the charts for me. But when our hunter population decided to out in the open, I thought maybe it is I can too be in the open, you know what I mean,” Dean wangles his eyebrows.

“We will get back to the origin of Hunter’s Help Hotline and the other projects you spearhead with your brother, I want to know about you too, how did this become a thing?”

“Well, you see Cas, how can anyone refuse this guy, huh?” Dean goes for bashful. He doesn’t want to be all sappy.

“I rebuild Dean’s soul in hell and rebelled but I think once I became human, I knew that what I felt for Dean was not merely friendship, you know we do share a profound bond. Also, he proposed to me, how could I say no?” 

“Really?” Dean looks at Cas, eyes shining with unadulterated love. 

“Of course Dean,”

Al clears his throat.

“Oh, right, sorry. We are still new to this thing. We danced around each other for a long time, he didn’t understand what he felt and I was too deep in the closet to even think about it. Cas was always a constant, apart from Sam and I don’t know when, when he came from the leviathan fiasco, or even before that, I knew he was the guy and have you heard him talk,” Dean winks.

“Dean,” Cas groans, knowing how insufferable his beloved can be. 

Al turns towards the camera, and says, I hope you are enjoying as much I am, and we will be right back after this commercial break. The camera pans out as the audiences witness, Dean cradling Cas’s head and kissing him.

Until next time.

#destiel fic #destiel #destiel ficlet #destiel fluff #deancas ficlet #deancas #casdean #deanxcas #deancas fic #deancas interview fic #deanxcas fic #deanxcas ficlet #deanxcas fluff #fluf #this may have more parts than I anticipated

[wheniwrite28]

Two Cas = Empty, 13.04 CODA

Dean is tired, when has been not tired since Cas... He is yet to utter those words, he has done that in midst of anger and pain but to sanely acknowledge that Cas is dead and what is burnt remains dead is something he just can’t. Not right now, when he is holding on to his tendrils of himself.

“I have no faith left,” Dean says to Sam, knowing that he may have burnt his faith away, all his hope, and last of his dreams of having a happy life. 

There is a moment, where he feels that life is going to be okay, it would be fine, he doesn't know why the spark flares up but it does somewhere within him.

***

Cas gets up in an empty field, and he can feel the sun shine on him and he remembers that Lucifer has stabbed him and he had died and rest is just empty. 

He looks at himself, Jimmy Novak’s body still his bodily embodiment and he sees himself in the same old trench coat and a blue tie. A twinge of familiar longing makes way to his heart. He wonders how does he make back to Dean. 

He is moving to find a phone or just reach the bunker. He has one goal and that is to make his way to Sam and Dean and lastly Jack. Jack needs him, he knows that.

***

8 bottles later, Dean feels better, buzzed and light. He feels empty of all the grief he felt. He wonders if he should have given that catharsis bullshit a chance. He knows that it doesn't work on gaping holes and endless pain. It doesn't work when you know the real thing is what you want returned. 

He wants his CAS back, not some doppelgänger who could never be him, no wonder he hates Jack so much.

The spark, heats up inside his body again. He wonders why, why his gut is going off, is his gut instinct also a mother fucking bastard, who is a masochist. He knows that it is not because Castiel can come back. That bridge has been burned. The empty is all he has.

***

Castiel finally finds a telephone booth and dials the number he has known since the first time he said, I will just wait here then.

The phone rings, a slow static present. 

Dean picks up, his voice slurred and tired, “Hello,”

***

The phone rings and he wonders who has died now. The joke is on him though.

He says, “Hello,” the next 4 beers making their effect known.

“Hello Dean,” If Dean Winchester, could die, in this godforsaken world, he would have died then. Happy enough, just enough to survive this empty.

#destiel #destiel 13.04 coda #destiel ficlet #deancas #deanxcas #deanxcas ficlet #dean cas 13.04 coda #13.04 coda #deanxcas 13.04 coda #hello dean #cas #castiel #cass #two can = empty

[wheniwrite28]

Hey it's me again! I like what you did with the prompt, it was really good :) I don't have a precise plot this time but could you write something sweet or some angst about Nurse!Dean falling in love with Cas over coffee but obviously Cas doesn't work in the medical field. That would be great :)

Worlds apart

The smell of coffee beans getting grounded, hit all Castiel senses. He had decided to work in a coffee shop instead of getting that library job was because he loved the atmosphere and how much he enjoyed making grumpy people come to life. It was a sight to behold.

Since he worked during the evening shift, he closed the 24x7 Coffee shop called “Not Heaven Yet Coffee” which was totally absurd for Cas, he had to work till 12 in the night.

And after around, 8pm, most of the crowd dissipated, and the lull in the otherwise hectic day, made me want to leave early. Yet, Gabriel, their boss was adamant, that no one should abandon their post, for we never knew who may need coffee at what time.

***

In one of those otherwise show nights, a fresh looking man came into the cafe, the bell diverting Castiel’s gaze towards him, and he was a sight to behold. And if Castiel took some time to pull himself together, no one should blame him.

“Hey, welcome to Not heaven but Coffee, what can I get you?” Castiel added cheerful.

“Yeah, one Americano, venti?” Person with really green eyes said.

“That would be 2.30 and coming right up!” He didn’t ask for name, as he might’ve the only person who was in the cafe. Even the displayed food shelves were also empty.

Just Castiel, and one stray cat that sometimes came for chocolate muffins and catnip that Castiel had bought after seeing her every other day for 4 months.

Castiel went to make the drink for the customer, and for the first time decided to make idle chit chat.

“So, you might be the only person since I started working here who doesn’t look like death at this hour,” where did so many words came from, Castiel was not entirely sure.

“Well, I start work in 15 minutes, I need to be awake for that and you know, seeing you had brightened my day or the night!”

“Ha,” Cas saw that he was wearing scrubs and decided that he must be a doctor or a nurse.

***

After another five months, Castiel knew that Dean, yes, those pretty eyes belonged to one Dean Winchester, who had became a regular at the cafe and in Castiel’s life same as the cat. Other than that, Castiel had been on 5 days with the said Dean, and it had been wonderful.

And with the bell sound, Dean was here for their 15 minutes date, that they had everyday. The biggest problem that they only 15 minutes and all their dates had been the same. They just couldn’t find time for each other, no matter how hard they tired.

Castiel could not take this. For how long he wondered.

***

Dean was excited to spend the best 15 minutes of his day. Working in ER in the night shift had made him jaded but Castiel bought some sunshine, when he very rarely saw actual sunshine.

“Hey Cas,” Dean smirked.

“Hello Dean,” Dean thought that his voice couldn’t get any rougher but it did.

Before Dean could say anything, Castiel was walking out, carrying Dean’s coffee and one slice of pie.

“Dean, we need to talk,” Castiel sighed.

“what’s up Cas?” He was still floating in his High of finally find someone he could spend time with.

“I don’t how to do this!” He didn’t, how do you reconcile two worlds that don’t want to come together.

“What? I thought this is going good?” Dean extensions faltered.

“It is, but I want to spend time more time with you and either you are busy, or you are sleeping! I don’t know how to have a boyfriend and not have him at the same time!” Castiel whispered shouted.

“I know, but it is for a few more months. Then you will graduate and I can take some day shifts and Sammy will graduate too,” Dean pleased.

“No, I don’t think I can.” Castiel, left. The pie still there, a full of coffee. For the first time in Dean life, he had left the pie untouched and he didn’t had any appetite for it anyway.

#Castiel #destiel #anonymous #also I might add another part this was getting bigger than I anticipated #thank you for the asks though #watch out for the next part- maybe tomorrow though #deancas #deanxcas #destiel ficlet #deanxcas ficlet #deancas ficlet #prompts

[wheniwrite28]

Cartoons and Knifes- 13.02 coda

He is sleeping in Cas's place, the same way. Dean doesn't know how not to stop and take rest. He needs to finish this journey as soon as possible. He needs to be alone, to not be around people, before the pain is too much to handle, too much to remain numb.

***

Sam asked him to take a break or he can drive. He needs control right now, he can't let baby also go. So he stops and they rent a room. Jack is watching cartoons with the same endearing expression that Cas had. He can't look at him, he just can't. He doesn't need this right now. He doesn't need reminders of Cas in front of him. It hurts too much.

Instead he chooses to combact hurt with hurt and makes Jack leave the room. They are eating later and Jack is mimicking Dean and he thinks that Dean would tether him to humanity but he can't, he has lost his soul along side Cas. He can't tether himself, how can he tether something else.

***

It is later, he is drinking, or at least a drink. He can't drink. It tastes like nothing, everything tastes the same, of sustenance and nothing. A big ol' nothing. Sam talks about rock bottom and how they come back. Dean doesn't say anything, internally he is shouting, "Sam this isn't the same. I don't feel the same. I can't come back, I don't even if I want to. Bounce back or anything."

But silence is the best answer, yes Sam has also people he loved but he has not lost the one he loved, one he longed for nine freaking years. He hasn't. So, Sam should shut up about loss, unless he wants to talk about Jess.

***

They save one more crises or something. They are back at the bunker. Dean is going towards his room and some more miserable night and nightmares when he hears Jack in the washroom. He is stabbing himself. Stabbing and healing. His tshirt looks like a mess and he sees the inocent hurt, he saw Cas what he was before Leviathans took over.

He tells he will kill Jack if he turned towards the dark side. He ha son forgiveness left, he doesn't believe that good things happen. He doesn't believe in one thing. Nothing, zilch, nada.

It should hurt less now, but he feels the same hurt, just a different day.

#13.02 coda #spn 13.02 coda #spn 13.02 #spn 13x02 #spn 13x02 coda #destiel #destiel ficlet #deancas ficlet #deanxcas ficlet #deanxcas #deancas

[wheniwrite28]

Worlds Apart 3

Part 1 Part 2

There is a weird sensation near his diaphragm, some what akin to a heaviness after a huge dinner but it seems purely mental. There could not be a physical reaction as Castiel has not eaten since he had his chat or when he stomped on his heart and left both of them bereft. 

It seemed logical at that time, they had no time for each other or Dean had not time for him and he wanted what everyone around him, college students had and his peers had. Everyone was happy in their relationship, going out on dates, watching movies together, just netflix and cuddling. He didn’t have any of that. He gets that it was only five months but he had known or gotten to know Dean for longer at least his soul though so.

They just clicked and now a piece of puzzle of his being was  missing and no amount of coffee smell could alleviate that.

When the clock strikes 12, he waits, knowing that Dean would never return, at least not today, even the cat is conspicuously absent. He wonders if he just let go of the most wonderful person in his life because he failed to see the beauty of what was there with him. Castiel doesn’t even realise when tears start to flow till one drops on the counter. He looks at it numb in a way, well, he deserves it. I will add links to the first and second one when I get on my laptop, phone is doing some wonky stuff

#worlds apart part 3 #can't believe I have three of there #I am putting the other two parts as links #destiel #deancas #deanxcas #destiel ficlet #deancas ficlet #deanxcas ficlet

[wheniwrite28]

They snuggle, Dean would whoelheartly say it is manly holding, he doesn't know why he gets such absurd ideas.

What happens behind closed doors stay that way. No one sees that Dean is held by Cas, not only by hand but also by his wings.

It becomes a routine. Life has a way of breaking perfect things. When angels fall, Cas too loses his wings and he can't hold Dean the way he used to. The wings now, a painful reminder of his past.

One day, when Cas is holding him and his wings are a carcass of broken desire, Dean flips him and holds him, till Cas melts and gets closer.

Dean, all 6'2", human with no wings, Molds himself around the one person who gave him everything and gave up everything for him. Cas had never felt more together in his existence.

#destiel #deancas #deanxcas #destiel drabble #dean winchester #destiel ficlet #castiel's wings #i dunno #alwritesstuff