#due to personal reasons i been done fucked up my entire life

[jinstronaut]

this is also why i stopped using my tracked tag for a while tbh

#and i might do it again bc its just #a reminder that no one rly cares abt what i do / who i am etc #which might sound over dramatic idk how else to describe it tho its just hollow #it feels very much like a Chore and a Task and if i dont reblog things fast enough from my tag #people get very angry and/or upset with me even tho theres just #so much content and i have 0 time so everything gets queued no matter what #like this whole experience feels like a chore lmao #and it never ever used to #but now theres so much animosity if i dont behave / interact with things Properly #or whatever the make believe rules are idk #this dash can just be so negative like have we all truly descended into madness during this hiatus #bc like i get it ive been up and down and all around too but ive never been straight up MEAN to anyone in this community #and i never want to either so this entire situation thats been bubbling for months just feels like shit #bc what the fuck changed and how do we get back to where we were #i never ever ever ever felt this way before like idk the middle of last year #but ever since like last fall its just been idk. Bad #once again im sorry if ive ever done anything to upset anyone but my silence / absence doesnt mean i dont care #ive just been Incredibly busy due to some real life changes that are out of my control #i might not have energy to answer everything but i do Read everything and it does make me smile #and i save messages that are kind in my heart so i can be reminded of the root of what this blog is supposed to be #a space for something im very passionate about and previously had nowhere else to express said passion #so like idk if we all like the same things why does this weird feeling of competition linger over us lmao #why do all ccs have to fight???? each other???? when we all love and do the same things???? #i have nothing against anyone personally but what i Do take issue with is the way that ive been doing this since 2021 and im fully just #ignored and shoved aside by so many people for reasons i fully dont know or understand #so yeah idk this is a novel i just woke up from a spontaneous nap bc im so exhausted i can only stay awake for 3 hours at a time #but yeah anyways idk ! #be nice its so easy ! #tbd

[cherrirui-official]

Friendlocke Violet Gijinkas (Part 1/7)

Since the edited episodes are starting to come out, I figured that bc of that and the fact that I've been keeping this in the back burner for a loooong while now, might as well complete all my friendlocke violet gijinkas!! Some are gonna stay the same while others are gonna have slight/ complete redesigns, so please keep that in mind!

I plan on posting them in order by groups of three, so there's gonna be seven parts in total, all of which I'll be linking here when done vvv

(Part Two) (Part Three) (Part Four) (Part Five) (Part Six) (Part Seven)

!! These will contain personal headcanons I have for the cast, little fun facts, and also spoilers for Friendlocke Violet (for both the edited vids and the streams) !!

@saltydkart-reblogs

And that's pretty much it, designs under the cut!

LARK:

HUGE nerd. spent most of his time during the Uva Academy studying different kinds of pokemon as well as different fighting styles he can utilize once he is able to go out on his own journey with his very own trainer! Too bad that didn't really help in the long run...

His entire wardrobe consists of McDonald's related outfits. It's fucking insane. He even has some from long LONG ago that aren't available anywhere else.

The bubble pattern on his hair is able to move and change. Nobody knows how this is possible, not even Lark himself. All Lark knows is that his hair looks incredibly stylish!

Speaking of bubbles, he has the ability to blow bubbles whenever and wherever he pleases!

Often keeps himself extremely clean and gets upset if even a small speck of dirt gets on him, despite this he somehow smells like McDonald's food and axe body spray. Disgusting. He's so cool!

Even after death he still likes to hang around the other team members as a ghost, often getting to know the newer members as well as reuniting with the old ones. Sometimes they see him, sometimes they don't. It usually depends.

SARA:

Due to being a human in her past life, Sara is able to actually speak with the other humans in the pokemon world. However she usually doesn't due to it being seen as extremely weird and out of place. She did slip up once while talking in the presence of Arven, who thought it was the weed making him hear things.

Oinkologne are usually unable to do much with their hooves but Sara spent nights practicing how to knit with her new hooves and now she's able to do it flawlessly. I don't know how she managed to do that but go queen!

When first joining the team she'd often have the urge to eat her food related companions. It was a strange time for Sara, but she managed to overcome it.

When Peppy gets sick, she usually is the one who nurses him back to health. She was a human once so she often is able to figure out whatever sickness Peppy has and treat it properly. I suppose she's like a second mother to him.

The bag she carries with her is full of thread that she collected from various Tarountula she encountered on the journey, as well as little things she knits together in her spare time.

For the most part, Sara forgives... but NEVER forgets.

Did you guys know that Sara has a new YouTube channel? Check it out!

Pastey:

Before joining the team, Pastey was a nameless wanderer. He's been down every road in Paldea and knows almost the entire region (except for Area Zero) like the back of his hand.

He's gotten hurt pretty badly throughout the run (ie. the Mikey fight, the Atticus fight, and ESPECIALLY the final battle), however, he does not gain any (physical) scars from those fights. This is bc he's basically an axolotl, and axolotls are usually able to heal without scarring.

Pastey's "arms" are, to put it simply, mud prosthetics. More info here vvv

Pastey HAS met Mall Bingo once before the run, however, he doesn't recognize her. The only reason he does not recognize her is bc she wears glasses. (You know how people somehow aren't able to recognize Superman bc he wears glasses in his civilian attire even tho his face remains the same? It's basically like that lmao)

Unlike the lightbulbs he eats, the gasoline he drinks isn't really mandatory to his diet. Gasoline is like alcohol to him and he drinks it like an absolute CHAMP.

He goes fishing when there's nothing else to do or when he can't sleep at night. He doesn't do this bc he thinks it's fun or anything, only bc it's a "good time passer" or so he claims. Other members of the team will often sit with him and vent out anything that's troubling them at the moment, and Pastey is always there to listen to them.

And that's pretty much it. Next is Joe, Hannah Ü, and Mykyie!

#I am a firm believer that Sara can and will beat ass #No i do NOT plan on making gijinka designs for Chatbike and Phil sorry guys #just getting that out of the way i know how much yall love phil /j /lh #Anyways it feels so good to finally start on this like holy moly #also idk when the others will be done... HOWEVER... #The sketches for Joe Hannah and Mikey are already pretty much done I just gotta make em digital #so ideally they'll be out pretty soonish I'd say... I hope #but yeah if anyone has any questions abt them feel free to send them in my askbox and I'll be happy to answer them as best as i can! #<- No anons tho sorry yall #Also I need to be honest here Lark's outfit kinda does look atrocious and I couldve changed it... BUT... #I honestly thought it was WAY funnier if Lark's attire looked weird on purpose so I kept it like that lol #Anyways sorry for the word vomit here are the tags #friendlocke #friendlocke violet #saltydkdan #should my gijinkas have their own tag...? Sure why not #Violet Gijinka Au #cherris canvas

[mcyt-trios]

FINAL ROUND

PROPAGANDA:

3 Heart Trio:

theyre soo silly theyre just silly little guys who do things like mining an entire chunk in the center of the server's spawn for their own entertainment and to annoy everyone else

They are PATHETIC. They are ANNOYING. They are PERFECT. They are playing on three hearts and they die so much. They have a specialized raid platform that is NOT a raid farm. They are a team against exploits! Their base has 3 hearts above it representing them

these guys decided to put love and fun above all on the killing-lying server. while watching other teams betray and fall apart they have stuck with each other till the very last day of the server and never doubted one another. they worked like a clockwork, they knew they could only rely on themselves and at the end of the day, they didnt mind that it was that way

these guys got the short end of the stick time and time again throughout all of lifesteal s4, they were the targets of so many traps and attacks for no reason other than they were weak and always around. and despite it all they never wanted revenge and never held grudges! they cared about fun and friendship more than anything else, and while all the other teams ended up falling apart or betraying each other, these three stuck together from start to end. they didn't care about how many hearts they had, how much gear they had, or how powerful they were, because in the end all they needed was each other <3 i miss them so bad btw

Eclipse Federation:

i dont like them. they ruined my life. Subz and Vitalasy had already partnered in previous seasons but this one, Vitalasy ended up leaving for a few months, leaving Subz alone, and Zam ended up getting close to him after immense trauma at the hands of his former teammates. Zam has done SO many wrongs, including to Subz himself and Subz STILL took him in and made him join Eclipse Federation after Zam died 14 times in a row and got banned then revived by the same player who's been killing him all this time. And it could've been perfect but no, Zam had betrayed his previous team due to them using dupes via exploits, and now Eclipse Federation ALSO has exploits! And he decided that yeah his morals were more important than being loved! And so he murders Vitalasy when he's at his most vulnerable point, lets everyone gaslight him into thinking Vitalasy is an irredeemable evil monster who will never change, even as Vitalasy SAID he was ready to change before the betrayal even happened, Eclipse threw out their whole revenge plans because of Zam's positive influence and he just broke everything. Subz couldn't be with Zam but also couldn't see himself at Vitalasy's side, leaving him alone. Vitalasy hated Zam and yet never killed him or hunted him down, despite Zam acting like he did. And when Vitalasy left, banning himself off from the server, Zam had some time alone to think and realized he fucked up SOOOO bad. And Subz revived Vitalasy and told him to kill him. And ban him. His last wish. His Deliverance. And to make up with Zam. And Vitalasy tried, and they kind of did make up over Subz's death, but then Zam was like "actually im going to kill everyone and destroy the server now. because i want subz back and also because i always do extremely drastic things when i don't need to because i have unchecked mental illnesses i refuse to get help for". And surprisingly when Subz came back he didn't like that! And they ended in tragedy! Eclipse is fucked up. It's a trio that's always about the absence of one person, it's a team that could only happen in one timeline and it was doomed from the very start. But the love was there. It made everything worse, truthfully. But it was there. And that matters. Also as a fun fact Zam himself on twitter has referred to eclipse as a throuple, which is not canon but that's pretty funny. he also stated on stream he didn't want to get therapy because it'd ruin his lifesteal character. and there was a saga where they would "marry" (challenge lost kinda shenanigans) and zam was the only one happy about it. he's not normal. there's something wrong with him. love that for him though sorry for the block of text. I really dislike them. They're my beloveds :3

#mcyt-trios #mcytblr trio bracket #polls #round 6 #final round #bracket

[lobotomytypebeat]

! Making a fan homestuck msfpa called KEYBOUND !

Keybound is a indie project by solely one person (me lmao...) This post is to share what i have already done so far, and what you all shall expect from this project!

CHARACTERS OTTO EVERRET

⇢ Otto everett is a kid passionate about adventures and mythological creatures, with a dream to be a fantasy hero and explore fantasy lands he has always dreamt about deep on his mind. Always looking for adventure he tends to put himself more onto trouble than…actually helping, but he tries.

Otto everett is a stubborn and determined kid, which could also be a HUGE pain in the ass sometimes. He has good intentions but sometimes doesnt have the easiest of times of voicing his good intentions.

Despite being very outgoing and a social butterfly…Otto is lonely, very lonely, as he lives isolated on the mansion and as he has been homeschooled by his father his entire life, the only connection to the outside he knows, its the woods and the rivers. Never really having contact with other kids and mostly running through the mansions halls and secret entrances, pretending to have great adventures slaying a dangerous beast.

Otto lives in a rustic mansion in the middle of the woods, with a huge observatory, huge walls, hell the mansion even having its own dinosaur fossil room. Otto is the son of Edric everett and Margaret Fields Edric everett is a renowed scientist in the science field and Margaret Fields is, one of the most renowed paleontologists that has stepped onto the scene and that has made great advancements. Unfortunately Margaret Fields had died in a nuclear breach right after Otto was born, killing her due to the explosion and overtime nuclear exposure. …though this is not exactly the case. Margaret did indeed die due to the nuclear breach…but while she was pregnant with Otto. The loss had brought immense grief to Edric, losing both his newborn son, and beloved wife. But due to the means of ectobiology, Edric recreated Otto with a exact copy of Margaret's DNA, making Otto essentialy…a clone of his mother. Otto has been raised as a fetus inside a incubator projected by his father.

DANN HARVEY

┇DANN HARVEY

⇢ Dann harvey is a absolute mess who is loud and in general very sociable and friendly…despite his social battery running out way too fast which is kind of ironic since he will shrink up like a dried raisin.

Dann is actually allergic to most things…for example lettuce for a reason, but he will eat it ANYWAY and almost FUCKING DIE.

Dann oftenly gets himself into dangerous situations and falls way too much for his own good…and will still joke through all of it at the end of the day like its funny haha when he is at a ER with two broken legs and a spine snapped in half. Peak commedy.

Dann wears the most atrocious shirts known to man with the most horrible cheesiest catch phrases. For example " show me your bobbers and i will show you my pole " or simply " professional racist " with race cars on it. Or straight up cunty queen with unicorns and rainbows plastered all across it.

In general dann is a mess of a teenager who is way too obsessed with tetris and minecraft and mountain dew and doritos…and most definetly has been a ipad kid.

Dann is also asmathic…its shitty as fuck paired up with a shit ton more of allergies he has.

Dann now currently lives with his loving grandma as he had switched from various and various foster homes. His grandma is the sweetest person alive and he loves her very very much.

Despite being energetic and a very outgoing person, Dann is someone who gets really stuck on his own thoughts and tends to think very negatively about himself when he is left alone. And in general dann is a highly anxious person and someone who CANNOT SIT STILL FOR THE LIFE OF HIM. He feels the primal urge that he has to unleash the beast at any second possible or else he will combust into sparkles and rainbows.

Dann is also prone to producing BIOHAZARDS ON THE KITCHEN HE CANT COOK FOR SHIT.

Dann's hobbies dont extend only to being way too enthusiastic about minecraft or tetris, but yet about collecting LPS and pokemon cards. Despite not being able to SIT THE FUCK DOWN FOR ONE SECOND, he really does care about his friends. He'd jump in the fucking cadiilac and hug a cactus in the name of friendship.

He genuinely does his best to lift up the spirits of his friends and make them happy, including being loud as fuck with them, and screaming at the whole entire world with them.

HARRIET BELLATRIX | her name in actuality is just Bell lmao, her momma wants her to sound fancy schmancy all of the time |

┇ HARRIET BELLATRIX

⇢ Harriet is a more closed off individual who finds enjoyment in small things and in general activities such as gardening and manual work. Her biggest passion being robotics.

Harriet is often underestimated by the way she dresses as well…its definetly not how kids in 2012 dress nowadays and she looks like she is going to a rainfaire. But harriet just dresses like that due to genuinely just enjoying herself and having a place on her heart for fashion, as she thinks she has to please anyone but herself.

Despite looking more closed off and serious, harriet is actually quite the enthusiastic individual who finds herself hyped up and energetic over interacting with friends and doing the things she enjoys.

Harriet may be a understanding person, but she has a huge sense of justice and a incredibly rebellious attitude, which causes her to have disagreements quite often, especially in situations of people not being treated equally or fairly as she will take issues onto her own hands and usually give people a piece of their mind without thinking twice. And one of her other main issues is her complex that she has to fix anything and everything, even if it seems absolutely impossible, her perfectionism also gets in the way most of the times as she thinks that if one specific thing goes wrong, it'll be an avalanche and everything will go downhill…while at the same time she cannot follow a schedule.

Harriet actually has bonds to royal family and lives in a huge castle on top of a mountain…that barely has any internet acess at all and its incredibly far away from town.

Harriet's mom lets say she is…..a conservative of royal values. Everything has to be on time, stat, ponctual and flawless etiquette…if the requirements arent met, lets say she wont hesitate to throw one of her own kids to the dungeons.

This may come as surprising to some, but harriet is absolutely obsessed with FURBIES, furbies being her absolute favorite thing in the planet. Harriet isnt exactly…a fan of etiquette or overcomplicated words and fancy schmancy terms. And in fact harriet does kind of have a southern accent and prefers to be more simple and open minded about things. She is quite the goof actually.

ELIN CARVALHO

┇ELIN CARVALHO

⇢ Elin carvalho is a brazilian transgirl that lives on a rented apartment in São Paulo.

Elin is a chill person, who pretty much is joking most of the time, finding humor even in bad situations that might occur to her, and she just so happend to look like she is stoned all of the time, well, she isnt in fact stoned, but it looks like she is due to how chill she actually is to a concerning level actually.

Her humor happens to be incredibly broken, laughing even at a single loaf of bread falling to the floor, as well, she finds any situation pretty entertaining and humorous.

She spends inumerous hours spamming her friends with memes and copypastas on the internet, and trolling random kids in the most depraved and degenerate internet forums, with saterical copypastas or just annoying the hell out of them.

Piracy is her roman empire and she literally strives to take down the capitalistic government, every single game and computer program she has? pirated, everything is pirated, and she may had installed a virus or two by accident and still insists her PC is fine despite it visibly not doing so great and it may be on the edge of exploding.

Elin is constantly humorous due to only wanting to bring more of a positive vibe to negative situations…even though she may come off as insensitive or rude, its not her intentions, she only wishes to make her friends and loved ones feel happy and not loathe on their misery.

Elin is someone who is very aware and sensitive about her surroundings, she knows when someone is feeling bad or not, and will help them however she can, and will do everything to make their day at least a little bit better and a little bit more acceptable.

Despite her humorous and constantly joking nature, elin lives with a abusive, strict, transphobic religious fanatic mother, that has a big skepticism towards technology and the internet.

Elin has a passion for making her own pirated programs…and saterical trojans for the funny haha.

THE CLASSPECTS

》▪︎ Gravity The gravity aspect is for the rule breakers, not because of rebellion or the need to change things, but just for the complete fun of it, afterall, rules are meant to be broken. Though they may be rebellious by nature, nothing too extreme as they never go after to change the rules, they just want to have fun. The ones that are gravity bound are random and playful by nature. Not the " rawr means i love you in dinosaur " kind of quirky and random but rather " i brought a raccoon to school because i wanted it as a pet and gave everyone rabies " kind of random. Gravity bound people are completely reckless, impulsive, random and absolutely unhinged, but are incredibly fun people to be around and amazing friends.

Gravity is...self explanatory, gravity manipulation. Altering gravity on any planet at will, even travelling throuought different spaces and even dimensions relying heavily only in gravity. The abilities of gravity bond players is also, floating and flying, teleportation, walk on walls, water, and etc, any type of surface.

》 ▪︎ Rift

The rift aspect in nature is more bold and cold, more observing of peoples surroundings and their own surroundings. Though one of their characteristics is that sometimes they may be too blinded by their own values and opinions. Rift bound people are creative and think outside the box a lot, oftenly finding ways out of situations no one really ever thought before. Other than the creativity one of their other main characteristics is the issue on expressing themselves through facial expressions, mostly relying on body gestures. In general people who are rift bound are very quiet and reserved and in general desire to be alone most of the time. Despite the lack of emotion those who are rift bound tend to be very emotional and sensitive, their facial expressions and tone never seem to match up with what they are feeling. Rift bound people tend to find themselves frustrated quite easily when they fail to do tasks, and mostly have trouble asking for help. They oftenly get easily irritated when things dont go their way, and they can be oftenly hypocritical. The abilities to those that are rift bond is opening portals, and tearing space and time to create wormholes for easy travel. those who are rift bond can use their portals to shoot laser beams out of them, and reflect attacks against opponents. Their other abilities may include, reality warping, flight, teleportation.

》 ▪︎ Plague

Plague is the aspect of the damned and the sufferers. The aspect of plague comes with acceptance and learning that the world isnt a completely positive place, though they are accepting they wont entirely do good to you, but be rather pessimistic due to the things they have already seen in their lives, thinking its all going to go the same way, they arent healers, they arent perfect beings, they cant fix or help you, but will be there for you. Plague bound players have one of many characteristics in common: Being self destructive to themselves and potentially destructive to others. Though they truly have wisdom of their actions, some may be way too blinded by their own actions and the world around them might twist to a different narrative pretty easily as they are easily influenciable surprisingly. Plague bound players can be quite explosive and unpredictable, which makes them even the more destructive to themselves and potentially others. They arent the root of all evil of course, they arent notorious or bad, but can definetly be dangerous, we do not reinforce stereotypes here buddy.

The plague aspect is mainly damage focused. They are associated with destruction and decay. The plague aspect can infest a wide ratio area with destruction, causing the area to slowly become inhabitable by any living creature or foe. In healing classes such as saint or enchantress, they will not heal, but rather drain health from foes and enemies to heal themselves. They are uncapable of healing teammates, if trying to do so, they will further drain their health and also make them sick.

》▪︎ Creation The creation aspect is to those who want to make a difference in the world they are in, even if their help is small or big. Creation bound players make differences in the world not by changing things or help fix whats already broken, but yet, create something new, build something that could improve peoples lives from the ground up. Creation bound players highly enjoy being near those they love, friends, family, and partners. They sure can be overprotective of their loved ones, but its only because around them, they grow very weary. Creation bound aspects have a tendency to not let go of the past despite starting a fresh start, as they may still hold a grudge or the past had scarred them badly, they will be hurt and still be hurt for a long time even after creating a new path for themselves, but in general, creatiom bound individuals are very strong people who had it really rough, and will continue to create a new fresh start to themselves and their loved ones from the ground up. They arent perfect and they accept that, and are willing on improving on their flaws, get better as a human being. In general creation bound people are very responsible of their own actions and will hold themselves accountable if they've done something wrong or damaging to others, and are willing to make it up for them in any way possible. Creation bound people are very closed off due to the hurt they've experienced before in life, and they may be skeptical of many things that may come their way.

The abilities of a creation bond player is obviously well...creation. They can create and perfectly replicate already living beings, and they can interact with the enviroment around them heavily, even creating new life on these enviroments. Though they are not only limited to creating life, but also giving life to inanimate objects and beings.

》▪︎ Wrath The aspect of pure skepticism, negativity and unsureness, but yet the one of leardership and understanding. The aspect of wrath is to the ones who are frustrated and fed up with life, tired of everything, feeding off of their own anger, fear, skepiticism. The feeling they have to lash out at any circumstance for pure self defense and for their own sakez the feeling that not everything is perfect or ok and that something terrible will happen in any god damned moment and its just lurking around the corner, waiting to jump out of the shadows. Feelings of doubt and uncertainty surround these who are wrath bound, constantly. But its not as bad as it seems. Wrath bound people are compassionate of other peoples pains and feelings, and will be a great guide through the dark tunnel. Despite all their doubt and uncertainty, they make deep connections with others, they are kind all around these tough spiky edges. They are highly explosive and have a very short temper, they are impatient and can be pretty over posessive of their things, and overobsessive of things they like and are mostly negative abound their surroundings due to feeling the need to fight constantly and defend themselves at all costs, which makes them find themselves explaining every single action of theirs out of pure fear. But despite all of this, they are great leaders, though they may be rough most of the time.

The ones who are wrath bond can convert their own pure hatred and anger into strength, this also goes to other negative feelings, such as fear. Their attack rate, and strength gets stronger the angrier and frustrated they are. The ones who are wrath bond can cause multiple attacks and wounds in a short amount of time, like everything is in slow motion. Their screaming can deafen and temporarily paralyze enemies, though it also can affect their allies. The aspect of wrath can temporarily stunt the attack, defense, and buff of enemies, making them incredibly vulnerable. They can heal themselves by entering contact with blood, any kind of blood and posess superhuman strengh, with enhanced durability.

》▪︎ Faith Faith is the aspect of the ones who are incredibly positive, to the ones who see the good in everything, though sometimes to a negative degree, to the point of toxic positivity and false hope. People who are faith bound have one characteristic in common, a immense savior complex, though it manifests in many different ways, in any way shape or form, they believe they are responsible for assisting other people, or in general that they are responsible for other peoples lives and their choices, especially if they are in a bad situation. Despite having good intentions, they can come off as controlling or bossy, when they believe something is a wrong or bad choice, and their savior complex oftenly gets on the way, even blinding themselves from the truth or even others.

The aspect of faith has the ability of telekinesis, illusion manipulation, telepathy, healing, and even in some cases, possession, flight, and calming enemies down, making them more vulnerable.

》 ▪︎ Sight Sight and Waves walk side by side as a balance dynamic. Right off the bat...Sight is different from Waves, literally and metaphorically. Sight bond players are incredibly aware of their surroundings, which cause them to be heavily paranoid almost all of the time. They always have gut feelings and can be quite judgemental of others at first. They are way too aware, way too aware of other peoples feelings and their surroundings, its like a sensory overload as they are always aware of everything and they can feel that something will happen at any second and at any waking hour. Hell they are even self aware of their own behavior all of the time and wont sleep for days and countless hours thinking about their life choices and what they did. Their abilities may include, future foresight, retrocognition, psychometry, dermo-optical perception, precognition, enhanced superhuman hearing and sight, hypersensitivity to surroundings enhanced, enhanced agility and speed. They are able to see through illusions and hallucinations...as they are too self aware, they will not be fooled by them, but yet be further paranoid. Their powers give them so much sensory overload that they may simply just break down at random.

》 ▪︎ Waves Chill laidback people who are mostly in their own world. They can blend in perfectly with the energy of others and be calm in severe situations, doing things with a calm mind and examining things carefully. Though due to how calm they are, they can be quite carefree and not be so aware of their surroundings or the feelings of others, afterall calm and chill doesnt exactly mean beinv aware of everything and anything and being thi divine god that always knows what to do. Once they learn the patterns they can flow and blend in, but at first they can be quite lost in a tricky situation, as wave bond people also tend to be quite clumsy and careless.

Their abilities include, hydrokinesis, water breathing, flight, walking on water, generating water, control the weather, boiling water or turning it into ice, enhanced agility while swimming.

》 ▪︎ Determination (if i see undertale jokes im disowning yall)

The determination aspect walks side by side with rebellion. As afterall, to change a unfair situation and bring equality and peace, you need…a lot of determinatoon and strong willed individuals. They are charming individuals who are able to gain peoples trust easily.

Determination bond are strong willed individuals, with their main common traits are, very passionate about their interests, and having a strong bond to friends, family and romantic partners, and creating connections with people rather easily.

Though…determination bond people tend to be very naive and easily manipulated, and usually needs the help of an outside force to open up their eyes, since due to their naive nature, they are blind to peoples manipulation.

Determination bond players are in general, very good willed people…but they are just way too blind as most of the time, they believe everyone is good, but when their eyes are open and their mind is clear, they will do anything to fight off evil and protect their loved ones.

Determination bond players are basically stackers, stacking attack statuses and buff statuses when they are inflicted any damage, though oppositely from wrath, they use positivity and ambition to deal more damage. They are more of a defensive class, their main weapons being shields and creating large bubbles around them to defend themselves and other teammates. They can change the size of their own weapon to make them bigger or smaller. They have enhanced strength and in general senses.

》 ▪︎Rebellion bond The rebellion bond aspect is…self explanatory.

People who dont abide by the rules, with the main goal to change what is unfair and give everyone equal chances, though sometimes being way too passionate about what they do and their motivations, they are good willed people.

Rebellion bond people tend to have trouble with communication, as their pursue for change isnt exactly the most stable. They may end up getting in disagreements or arguments with fellow teammates when they have opposing opinions. They have good intentions, of course, but their pursue for change and approach can be quite tricky…as they are more of the " i need to solve this now, this will be future me problem, im dealing with the consequences later. "

They are more of a strength and attack focused class, those who are rebellion bond have a enhanced awareness of where a enemies weak point is and will target that weak point, their attack is not enhanced, however now their attacks are sharper and have a better piercing proficiency. They posess limited telekinesis, being able to push enemies away or bring them closer at high speeds. They dont fly but yet they can float up in the air and not take fall damage. They can temporarily freeze enemies in place or simply paralyze them.

》 ▪︎ Soul Those who are soul bound feel a inner connection with themselves and their true selves. The soul is irrational, impulsive, the definition of having hearts for brains. They are highly emotive and sensitive, though of course, its not a bad thing. Despite their emotions getting in the way of thinking rationally, they are truly good people. They dont have issues on expressing who they are, they stand out from the crowd, and are proud of it, they arent ashamed to be who they are inside. They have a deep connection with friends, family, and partners.

The powers of those who are soul bound are heavily focused on emotion. They can absorb the feelings of others to themselves, such as bad feelings, and etc. Their shadow acts as its own being if they even so desire, and they are also able of controlling the shadow of others. If overwhelmed, a protection barrier will be formed around them, that blocks all sound and any contact from the external world. Their tears have healing properties and relaxing properties, being able to heal the deepest of wounds and relaxing someone when they are the most overwhelmed. They also posess Pathokinesis, the power of projecting one's own emotions onto other people. They can create objects and other moveable beings out of their own shadow. and one of their other abilities is psychometry.

》 ▪︎ Instinct

The instinct bound feel the need to put on a role or a different perspective of what they actually are. Not because they feel the need to hide, but because they feel that they can express themselves more by putting up a different mask and a different role. Instinct bound players are rational and think mostly with their brain, which drives them to not be the most sensitive of the bunch...not because of malice or bad will, but mostly because they are cold individuals that have trouble with expressions, expressing their feelings through voice tone or body language, and in general lack more empathy than usual and its not something that they can control. Though instinct bound tend to be a bit self absorvant, they arent a creature of seven heads, but they make mistakes, they are human afterall.

Their main abilities are strong telekinesis, xenoglossy, bilocation, astral projection at will and even summon an ally from astral projections, controlling their own reflections on mirrors and even the reflection of others, also being able to pull the reflections out of the mirrors.

┆NULL BLOODS ╶ Null bloods are a odd type of trolls. Null bloods are a type of troll that can shift their own blood onto the blood of other trolls and adapt to their specific characteristics so they can blend themselves in society. Its like shapeshifting, but with blood if you will. Null bloods are a bloodcaste that have been exterminated by unknown causes, but most likely exterminated due to the potential of dethroning the rulers of alternia. Null bloods are artificially made trolls, by a olden forgotten technique, the troll alchemy. Made with the sole purpose as a bag of donating their own organs and blood transfusions, a walking sack of organ donations. Null bloods mostly have had no autonomy in the past as they were seen as nothing but helpers and offerings. The blood color of a null blood is completely grey, and it goes through a transumation alchemical process inside their bodies to match the exact blood of the nearest troll nearby. They cannot shift their blood onto a specific color in free will, they have to have another troll right next to them for that to occur. The components of a null blood in the alchemical process are different parts of multiple different animals, and other natural components, as also fresh blood from other trolls. Its almost the same process as creating a chimera.

┆How to spot a NULLBLOOD on its RAW FORM? ↪ Nullbloods on their true characteristics may include the following features. ↱ ADULT NULL BLOODS ᎒ Long limbs. Especifically and especially the arms and legs. Long and rooted unicorn like hurn purtruting on the middle of their forehead. Long ears, slim tail, spikes growing on their backs. Sharper features, long fangs and a strong carapace across their body. A lot of body hair and fur. Tall, incredibly tall, getting to an avarage of 9 feet tall.

____________________________ ↱ YOUNG NULL BLOODS ┋Lanky and tall, shorter horns. Carapace and fangs are as not as developed. They walk awkwardly due to their height. White spots all across their body, these grow out overtime as they grow up.

------------------------------------------------ Rift ferrets

Rift ferrets are a subspecies in the grand variety of rift creatures. Rift ferrets being the most friendly and mischevious between the rift beasts, they mostly cause no harm unless you startle them. Rift ferrets generally are in groups and in colonies of more than 1000 ferrets. The colonies being multiple wormholes in the universe and space, and in general they inhabit milkyway and other galaxies. The rift ferret, is 65 cm in length, with a long tail that posesses a wisp-like effect. Their bodies emit a soft glow. This variant, the original variant, lives in society with other rift ferrets, and build their burrows in moons. Rift ferrets have the ability to float as a way to travel throuought space. This variant is known as " the original variant " as it is what rift ferrets looked like before adapting to the habitats of prospit or derse. This variant is not as common anymore, and is the verge of extinction as rift ferrets move their burrows to prospit or derse. The population of the original variant is scarse, now you may find only groups of about 5 or 10 of these willow-wy wisp fellas. Rift ferrets have mutated and changed as they started to inhabit the planets of prospit and derse. The habitat around them changing their physiology, behavior, and how they live.

PROSPIT VARIANT

The prospit variant is more friendly and outgoing by nature. Highly curious about its surroundings and they tend to play with eachother a lot. Hunt in packs and share their prey. The hunting stragedy of a prospitian rift ferret is to use the stars that float on top of its ears to spread a colorful glitter-like substance that will attract fellow gravity mice and void beetles due to its bright light and mesmorizing movement on the air. Their appearance may decieve many…but they are highly mischevious and will play pranks on foreigners. Prospitian rift ferrets seem to have a undeniable love for tuna. If felt in danger, Prospitian rift ferrets will stack on top of eachother and make a tower to scare off any harm.

Prospitian rift ferrets seem to be larger than Dersite rift ferrets. Being 70 cm in length and the size of a lap dog, while Dersite rift ferrets are smaller, being 50 cm in length.

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DERSE VARIANT

The dersite variant of the rift ferret is a more closed off and reserved specimen, not really socializing even with the ones of its own kind, as they frequently also tend to fight eachother and get into conflicts quite easily. They arent quite fond of foreigners and will mostly hide away in their burrows, though they will certainly wait for a moment to strike down anyone who they view and percieve as a threat.

Dersite rift ferrets have developed extremely good night vision and nocturnal habits due to derse being a dark habitat, so they could better navigate around, but one of their major weaknesses being light, and is one of the reasons as they have never set foot in prospit as the light is too bright, even the light emanating from the bodies of prospitian rift ferrets are too much for them.

Dersite rift ferrets are lone hunters, and will actively fight others of their kind for prey and food. They arent exactly the most friendliest of creatures, but are certainly very loyal, depicting affection with truly trusted ones like purrbeasts do. Dersite rift ferrets have a mechanism on their backs that rises up spikes from the back of their spike out of their own skin, launching the spikes onto targets, the spikes contain poison and can cause fatigue, migraines, throwing up, bleeding from the eyes and ears as the venom is too strong. Their backs is also a very sensitive area to them, so watch out.

What happend to prospit and derse?

The war between the two planets eventually lead to the destruction of both kingdoms and both civilizations. Prospitians and Dersites are now long gone as war had extended til' the modern days on the planet, and eventually led the monarchs and their society to their own demise. The obsession with the war and past happenings led these societies to their end.

the planets are now composed of multiple abandonned buildings and ruins. The golden city of prospit has multiple buildings knocked down or mostly only their structure intact, while its overrun by black plants with sharp spikes and white glittery moss, while the planet of derse is surrounded by white vines latching onto their buildings, and huge black flowers spread all across the city, white fungi with yellow sparkling substances on their stems would grow to large sizes and would make a entire root system across the planets. Both planets have the aesthetic of a post apocalyptic setting in a modern world. Strange plants have shown up on the planet, mostly invasive species, and life has taken its course as new life started to inhabit the planet. Rift ferrets have seen to be taken a liking of the inhabited planets…making it their new homes and slowly constructing a new society.

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》New machines of this new version of SBURB

▪︎ Sacradia box ; The sacradia box is a huge machine which works like a vending machine. Deposit a certain amount of grist and a randomized item or prepunched card will pop right out! But watch out as the items get launched from the machine and not gently deposited onto your tiny grubby hands. Hell it may even take out some of your HP.

Keyquinox ; source to the creation of planets and worlds in this version of SBURB The keyquinox machine has the capability of generating a world key from a totem lathe or merge two keys to form a completely new generated land, the key of the formation of planets of this new universe as possibilities are endless.

Transporter ; The transporter is essentialy a portal where you put your key or a generated key from the " keyquinox " to generate and enter new worlds and planets. Inside the portal once you step in, is an empty void with a hub full of doors that stand on the void which you can unlock with the keys, opening doors to new realms or realms that you already once knew.

The clockwork: The clockwork is a cilindrical machine with a huge arc over it that is used to obtain a TOTEM. But go fast, as the first time you open the cilindrical machine, a timer will go by and the clock that stays right on top of the machine will start ticking loudly.

The workshop: Used to produce totem lathes with punched cards.

Alchemy table: Used for alchemization and creation of objects….but it looks…oddly different from what its supposed to be.

Pryntix 9000 : generic ass name for a machine that punches cards for you…its actually not something you place but yet its something small which you can carry around. It resembles a paper clipper which is sorta funny.

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but what are the keys for anyway? how do they work? where do they come from? This will all be explained in this box of text! follow my lead as i will be your guide to the ultimate KEY WIKIPEDIA. The universal keys are a peculiar object, as there is no point of origin to these phenomenoms. But they came along with this new curious version of sburb. The keys seem to have bars and lines of universal undecipherable code that isnt from this world we currently know. The key seems to be highly aware of its user and holder…as its bars of code start changing and morphing based off of who the holder is as a person. Knowing their passions, aspirations, true desires and purpose. the keys are a granted PATHWAY to the creation of new planets and worlds on this new SBURB, based off of the code that resides inside the keys. A whole new world, new fauna, new locations, new flora, new biology and completely new lifeforms and enemies.

The KEYQUINOX is the machine responsible for the creation of these keys. But in order for the machine to work, a external influence has to activate the MAIN GATEWAY.

Main gateways are huge machines spread throughout the planet of skaia…the planet we are familiarized with and truly know. It is a external force that has existed before the SBURB beta has even launched. All key variants were created after the MAIN GATEWAYS were activated…except for one variant of key, the chaos star key, which is currently now in the posession of a holder. The current active gateway resides deep inside a subterranian temple, that can be acessed through a cave. The reason they are there? who the fuck knows, but they look old as fuck, almost ancient.

[ Trolls over the years have developed and evolved, adapting new characteristics. ] Rustbloods and Bronzebloods Have Evolved in Many Different Ways, These Two Bloodcastes Have Developed Their Pupils To Be Shaped More Like The Pupils That Are Present On: Goats, Deer, Sheep, And Many More. Rustbloods and Bronzebloods Have Started To Develop More Fur On Their Backs, Arms, And Legs, Along With Hooves, Tuft Tails, Or Short Nubby Tails, Spot Markings, Rooted Horns, More Antlerlike Horns, And More Goatlike Ears. There Tends To Have A Variation Of The Furs That Form On The Trolls Body, For Example, Texture And Form. These Bloodcastes Now Experience Hoof, And Horn Overgrowth, And in Some Trolls, Even The Change of Horns Overtime, Just Like Deer do. If Horn Overgrowth Isnt Taken Care of, It Could Harm The Troll as in Some Cases, The Horn May Be Too Close To The Eyes, And Could Permanentely Damage The Trolls Vision as The Horn Would Pierce Through The Eyes. Unfortunetly, Over The Years, Both Rustbloods and Bronzebloods Could Experience A Disease Called " Internal Rotting Disease. " A Disease That Overtime Rots Their Brain, Killing Every Single Neuron And Braincell They Have Alive, Including Parasites Infesting Their Stomachs, Eating Everything The Troll Consumes And Eating Them From The Inside Out. The symptoms of " Internal rotting disease " May include: The death of the braincells, thirst, stomach burning, itching feeling from the inside, progressively losing the ability of speech, tiredness, fatigue, exhaustion, diarhea, vomiting, vomiting blood symptoms start only being present after a sweep has passed, and the host of the disease is mostly unaware of it and may spread it to other trolls in the area, though it only affects rustbloods and bronzebloods especifically. currently no cure is known for this deadly disease, and up to 100+ trolls suffer from it every sweep, causing the mortality rate for lower bloodcastes to go further up.

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Goldbloods have envolved to have a extra set of arms, a moth-like or bee-like fuzz around their necks, bigger eyes and eyelashes, and their body patterns have developed to be more half and half, and a new mutation has emerged...conjoined troll twins. Two cocoons that have fused during formation, the phenomenom has emerging slowly through the years in alternia, the signs being more predominant. Most conjoined twins do not come out alive, as they are immediatly eleminated. Olive bloods have evolved to have more slit pupils, a set of more feline and canine teeth structure, their ears are now further above the head, coming in variations of: Perked ears, Bunny ears, Rat-like ears, Floppy ears, Long perked ears, Long flop ears, Canine flopped ears. They have started to develop longer tails and more fur across their bodies. More digitegrade legs, and body patterns that may include: Spots, Leopard patterns, stripes, sploches, gradients. another odd phenomenom that has been happening is olive bloods suddenly losing all control of their own actions...acting more like a beast than troll, losing all of the aspects that make them troll...the phenomenom is very similar to human lycanthropy.

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Jade bloods have started to develop body patterns that imitate very specific shapes...like swirls and waves and jade green gradients on their forearm, hands, legs and feet. Jade bloods have started to develop more butterfly and fairylike wings, grow more in size, reaching up to 6 feet. Teal bloods have started to develop body patterns that resemble more scales, and they have a tedency to be darker than the rest of the body or have pigment. Their characteristics overall being more similar to lizards, especially visible on their tails, and how they now posess brilles instead of eyelids.

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Cerulean bloods have started to develop body patterns that look like waves and resemble multiple eyes. Their grey skin tends to be in a darker tone and their body patterns always will have pigment no matter the circumstances. Cerulean bloods can now have eyes on their jugular, arms, hands, shoulders, and etc. Just like gold bloods, they can now posess more than one set of arms, and their tails now mostly resemble what a spider has on its back rear end. Cerulean bloods can now stick to walls easily and even walk on them. Indigo bloods, just like rustlboods, have developed more digitegrade legs and hooves for their feet. Their tail now resembles more like a horse, and their body patterns now resemble mostly how horse coat pattern looks like. Their body patterns also has way less pigment than other trolls, and they are more prone to having absolutely no pigment or melanin on their patterns especifically.

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The body patterns of purple bloods seem to be randomized, and have a white and purple gradient on them instead of having a solid color. Now purple bloods also have a tendency of painting over their natural body patterns rainbow. Their ears have enlongated in size, along with their legs getting lankier and taller, and their tail getting bigger. Their tail mostly resembles a tuft tail. Their teeth are now chunkier, wider and longer in size.

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Violet bloods and Fuchsia bloods almost have no differences. They have both developed more fishlike characteristics and are even more prone to have half of their body more fishlike. Their body patterns resemble more the patterns of orcas, sharks, clownfish, and many more fish species. Though now, fuchsia bloods seem to have been getting bigger, and developing more muscle mass than violet bloods.

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Mutants still are weaker than the avarage troll, though they are highly resistant and immune to poison and other toxic materials. Mutants dont have a defined body pattern, but seems to posess more gradiants than usual. Short nubby tails along with the short nubby horns. Mutant bloods have a 100% rate of having leucism on their body patterns, though leucism can occur on trolls, mutants have a 100% percent rate of leucism. Their sclera remains yellow, but their eyes are now more of a slit, and are in more of a white pale purple or red color.

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This is all i have for now folks! i will release extra content soon. reblogs appreciated! <3

#keybound #hs #hom3stuck #homestuck #homestuck trolls #homestuck kids #homestuck au #homestuck ripoff #homestuck fandom #my art #digital art #lore rambles #world building #lore dump #magic system #lore post #oc lore #lore #webcomic #indie webcomic #original art #digital illustration

[psychopathicfreak]

I know that no personality disorder or mental illness makes anyone innately abusive or a bad person, and it’s never an excuse to treat someone like shit because you feel like shit yourself, but there’s so much toxic as fuck shit I’ve said and done that I WOULD NOT HAVE DONE if I wasn’t this fucked in the head, ESPECIALLY when I was younger and uninformed about these things . It’s so much harder to be pleasant to those close to you when the smallest act of defiance screams that they’re going to leave you, you have no control, you’re powerless, they’ve lost all respect for you, they’re leaving, they’re abandoning you, they fucking lied to you, they don’t care for you even in the slightest, they want you fucking dead, everything you’ve done for them means nothing . EVERY SINGLE THOUGHT SCREAMS THAT IT NEEDS TO BE IMPOSSIBLE FOR THEM TO LEAVE, TO DISOBEY, TO HAVE ANY SORT OF SELF — CONTROL OR THEY WILL LEAVE OR DENY YOU AND YOU KNOW THAT WOULD SHATTER YOUR ENTIRE WORLD .

It may be possible to treat someone well when you are experiencing this, but it fucking takes a lot . Not everyone has access to therapy or a diagnosis, at least not immediately, and emotional intelligence and self — awareness can vary a lot .

I’ve been in therapy for years, and I still can’t handle small acts of defiance . It doesn’t matter how many times you tell the calm version of me that it isn’t them hating me . . . I feel like, if they’re standing up to me, they feel I don’t have control over them . That means they can just leave . I don’t understand how else to see this ? I completely snap and can’t think straight . It’s like being cut open and having boiling water poured inside the cuts . It feels like it’s only self — preservation to only feel comfortable around people who have no access to the tools to do that to you . It’s instinctual, and it’s VERY, VERY fucking difficult for someone who struggles with impulse control to not act on instinct when their life feels threatened .

I truly believe that the average “ empath ” would be a “ worse person ” than me if they woke up with my problems in place of their own, and yet the second I screw up even slightly, and they bare witness to an intense, even if functionally harmless, episode of rage, they love to fucking run with that and paint everyone with a personality disorder as some abusive piece of shit . It is as if they WANT to push people who are struggling into snapping so they can be right about us being bad . Even if you don’t care about mentally ill people, surely you understand how it is worse for society as a whole to act as if those of us who may have less control over our actions or may find it easier to hurt others due to caring less about the consequences or the feelings of others shouldn’t even try to be better, to dismiss our efforts entirely, and act as if we are just doomed to hurt everyone around us, as if every single slight fuck up is evidence that we are just terrible . . . This narrative helps NOBODY . It isn’t just people with personality disorders or other “ scary ” mental illnesses that could reasonably suffer due to this outlook .

#bpd #cluster b #antisocial personality disorder #aspd #narcissistic personality disorder #npd #borderline personality disorder #vent #rant #schizophrenia

[7habitsofhighlyeviceratedpeople]

SERIOUS EDIT: idk what i was on when i posted this and i seriously regret it i don’t even have an explanation (or at least one that doesn’t sound like en excuse) but just disregard it i’d delete it but it’s been reblogged and i rlly wish i never said this bc it’s nothing like what i think i wanted to say.

I don’t condone certain aspects of the Outlast lore edit: please read my reblog regarding what i say about Outlast 2 it’s not relevant to my point, plus this is just a rant about something stupid and specific plus i have no idea what i’m talking about regarding Outlast 2 for the most part plus i’m being hypocritical (namely the jessica thing i think it could have been done better and CSA didn’t rlly have to be a part of it to show religious trauma but i get it when you look at the big picture of Outlast and Outlast 2, it just could have been infinitely less graphic and still held the same weight) but literally it’s going too far saying shit like FOR EXAMPLE “making Richard Trager a rapist was unnecessary” Id argue it’s one of the only characters that like actually makes sense from a lore perspective and if you rlly get the character you’d understand why it makes sense. Idk how to say this without sounding like it’s a feature i enjoy about the character, I obviously don’t but like i cannot stand seeing my favorite characters misinterpreted and along with Eddie, Trager is one of the most misinterpreted characters in Outlast. He literally has 0 reedemable qualities, he’s an outright rich prick who never had to face any consequences his entire life, he’s been privileged since the day he was born, and anyone who tries to act like he has a good bone in his body is so wrong. I hate to say it (no i don’t lol) but he’s just plain evil and i love him for it. He’s not real, his actions have never hurt a real person please keep that in mind. The main story wouldn’t have happened the way it did if he never did what he did, they’d have to come up with a whole other backstory for him AND a reason women were removed. It’s a horror game with dark, explicit subjects due to the fact that they’re exploring such a unique subject, with characters who are mentally ill, affected by the engine, both or just plain terrible people and it obviously would have things that may trigger or make people uncomfortable, and that has to be up to you to decide to not think about it or indulge into content that might do those things. Do not bring cancel culture into fucking Outlast, do not try to babyproof it. Go watch other forms of media with lighter subjects and characters instead of acting like it’s the developers fault for creating characters and plotlines with the whole point to scare people, shock them, make them uncomfortable, etc or remaking the characters into something they’re not bc it doesn’t fit your idea of them. Rant over if I see one more person misinterpret Richard Trager i will start taking peoples eyes. (also more rants abt Rick’s character coming be prepped)

edit 2; this is being wildly misinterpreted as a discussion post or place to argue or share opinions and im not saying you can’t bc it’s a public post but the point was simply to share smthn i wanted to rant abt (for a reason btw) and i worded it pretty bad bc the point i was trying to make can be summed up way better by other people who agree with me in the reblogs and wish i didn’t post it. would appreciate no more reblogs and for those who reblogged before i turned them off pls also turn off reblogs if you see this por favor <3

#team rick #the murkoff account

[kurisus]

Chapter 104 thoughts

I'm back from posting purgatory and have rewritten, more or less, what Tumblr deleted, so now it's time for my favorite game: Ina Tries To Figure Out What The Fuck Happened In The Latest Noragami Chapter. Spoilers under the cut.

So at the beginning we see trash dad cut himself free from Fujisaki and revert to his original form, while Fujisaki wakes up in Yukine's old house, far from home. I'm really interested to see how much he knows, which I said last time--whether he was aware he was being used or if he's basically been unconscious for the past year. I think he has to be aware on some level, because he knows Father's true name and has to invoke it to summon him from Yomi, but it would also be funny if he flies into a panic, follows the newly created lake, and ends up with the main cast. How far are they from the house, anyway?

Come to think of it, I've been reading Alive since last month (Adachitoka's first manga, which was written by their mentor while they drew the art) and while I'm not done yet, the north of Japan features prominently as a setting for that story and as the final showdown for this one. I'm not sure why, maybe they're from there, but it's interesting.

I'm so glad Yato slammed into trash dad after he insulted Mizuchi. It shows he does recognize her as a victim, and is willing to let things mend between them, since she's had her own character arc since Yato released her name. Don't get me wrong, that was still the right choice for him at the time--but they've both changed since then. And I always love the character development in this manga so this had me bouncing in my seat.

YATO ALSO SAYING HE'S NOTHING BUT A DEAD PERSON LIKE YESSSSSS GET HIM GET HIM KILL HIS MISERABLE ASS

Ahem. I wish Yato had been able to land at least one punch on this horrible man, but it's time for a shounen powerup.

Using the koto no ha on himself grants trash dad access to Izanami/Izanagi level powers, which I think is a temporary powerup that will end with Izanami taking him back to Yomi, because of how he can "feel her breath" on his neck. He plans to then escape again, and possess another body.

This new power is an ass pull as fast-moon put it, but it's also not the first of its kind in Noragami. Think back to Yukine getting cut in half and becoming a hafuri, Amaterasu appearing out of nowhere to give Hiyori the hint that saved Yato's life in Yomi, and how the main characters were saved from the covenant which provided the entire basis for the current arc (due to unresolved tensions between them and the rest of heaven). Basically, in Noragami these things happen with good reason and/or hugely impact the rest of the story, so I think it's best to wait and see how this trash dad development plays out before making judgments on how it affects the writing quality.

There's an old Noragami theory that Father is Izanagi, or stole his power, and it's been mostly dismissed in recent years (but there's an echodrops post about it here if you're interested in the points it made) and even more so since we got snippets of his backstory, but I think it's worth bringing back up now. Izanagi has been suspiciously absent from the manga, and I'm not sure he's even been mentioned, so I wonder if the koto no ha ties into that somehow. Honestly if Izanami killed him in this version of the story and used his power to make the koto no ha, good for her.

Anyway, trash dad reveals he's not just some human who came back from the dead. He can use these powers of creation; it's unclear whether he's used them before, but Yato has never seen him do so--Mizuchi seems to know what he's doing, but it's also unclear whether she's seen it either. I said years ago I don't think it was easy as him just returning from the dead and being granted godlike powers, but I haven't been insistent on it so much because I did a reread of the official translation two years ago and that version heavily implies the only thing trash dad did to get his powers was come back from the dead. I wonder how they'll reconcile that when this volume gets translated (please hold for another 2 years, lmfao).

Is this Izanagi's power, or Izanami's? Did he steal Izanagi's powers next after he paid Izanami a visit? Did he know what using the koto no ha on himself would do? Was it an educated guess based on Izanami's power? Is it still possible he could be a reincarnated Izanagi that believed himself to be human? I don't know if I'd like that last one, but these are the questions I hope to have answered.

Taking a brief detour to discuss that Kiun and Mayu have joined forces to look for their gods, and Ookuninushi is alive but has with him three freshly reincarnated gods--Yatagarasu, Kagutsuchi, and Shinatsuhiko. I'm shocked he lived and they died, but it may lead to an interesting change in heaven where he has to reconcile how they threw away their shinki lives even after they were explicitly told not to use them. The way heaven (and most gods) treat their shinki as not people but disposable tools has been a long-running theme of this manga, and it's been clear larger-scale changes need to be made.

So back to the main event, trash dad creates a biblical sort of flood, but one that brings images of the past. Alongside the tree where a young Yato named Sakura, we also see a cottage and a multi-level house. The cottage may be where Yato and Hiiro were raised, or it might be the one from the Father flashbacks: Check them out side by side:

(103-2; page 1 [Father and Kaya village]; 104, page 21; 45, page 33 [Yato, Hiiro, Father cottage] if you want to check for yourself)

Next, there's that multi-story building, which could be the place where Yato made his first kills, or Hiyori's grandmother's house. There isn't much visible, so it's hard to tell, but here's another side by side:

(46, page 9 [where Yato made his first kills]; 104, page 21; 85, page 42 [Hiyori's grandmother's house])

If this enchanted world functions similarly to Hiyori viewing Yato's past while he's asleep, Hiyori will get to experience trash dad's past as it really happened. I've mentioned before it bothers me how the gravekeeper has been narrating the events even though he wasn't present for any of them, so it's entirely likely Father manipulated the facts of his history, or they naturally changed over the course of a thousand years.

I also think Hiyori could find out trash dad's weak point, his true name, if/when she witnesses his past. She could then become his lifeline and decide to let the secret die with her. Or he could possess her, but I'm being optimistic.

The tree she sees is the tree where Yato named Sakura, but it could also have some significance to Father and Kaya; if the cottage where he raised Yato and Hiiro was in the same general location as that village, he could have some memories there.

So if we get Hiyori and Sakura interaction I will cry. If we get Hiyori and Kaya interaction I will also cry.

Next few chapters I'm really excited to see where this enchanted lake dimension thing goes. Yukine could also be caught up in it, depending on how far it has spread, and it'll be interesting to see how Amaterasu reacts to it too.

I don't normally say this, but reblogs are appreciated. This post required a lot of skimming older chapters to tie my thoughts together, and my original draft got half erased when I was just finishing it up so I had to rewrite a lot of it. Plus it seems like everyone was pretty confused by the events of this chapter, so a reblog would help to spread it around and hopefully shed some light on the events. Thanks!

#Noragami #Noragami manga #Noragami spoilers #ngl I am sad it's not a full chapter but did yall see the new springtime lottery art. I cried #I might be back with more thoughts later cause I feel like I couldn't recall everything I had written previously #it is time to create a master doc of my thoughts I suppose. fun project #live update

[decadesfinds]

A realism tip and slight tangent for your 1890s-1950s sim homes!

When placing a sewing machine, pair it with a rocking chair.

Rocking chairs (usually without arms!) were used to help keep rhythm with the manual treadle pedal of the sewing machine, which required you to move it back and forth with your feet in order to keep the machine running smoothly. A rocker was the ultimate tool for this, because it also helped a tailor or wife to not hunch over, as you can't rock that way. It saved your back, and your shoulders, from aches and pains. Some people even used them when longform typing became more common and the angle of the fountain pen was no longer a going concern. (I own three Chinese fountain pens. They're actually quite nice to use, but you're fucked if you're on an angle.)

The reason this went away was electric sewing machines and the slow death of home economics and home skills like sewing your own clothing. Prosperity and mass production was nothing new - many eras throughout history often didn't bother making their own clothing, including Colonial America - as they were able to just go to the shop and buy something new after being fitted for it and commissioning a tailor. There were also off-the-shelf options. These came back after WW2 and all but wiped out the culture of home-sewing that had been cultivated between the turn of the century and the two wars. It was often that you could even get together with others you knew and collaborate on a piece, especially if skills overlapped, to make it quickly. Such occasions slowly became "sewing circles" and would spin off into other hobbies.

Sewing machine owners were almost always women or girls (as the past would define it. AFABs, basically.) The machines were even sized for smaller hands, which was a stereotype about women's bodies for a long time. Though men could sew, it was often seen as something only men who were "infirm" or "invalid" (injured or disabled) could do, as a way to pass the time when unable to leave the home or place of care. Hand-sewing was seen as manlier, as it was much easier to do in the middle of a logging camp or out herding sheep across the plains. (I personally picked it up due to being raised into a very, very conservative church that taught all the prepper essentials. I'm obviously no longer a part of that place and would burn it to the ground if I could, but hey, free life skills.)

With the can-do, make-do spirit that pervaded the first half of the 20th century, many women found themselves in charge of making their entire family's clothing, curtains, and household items such as linens, as a cost-saving measure or out of a specific need.

For an IRL example, my previous home that I lived in for 11 years had hand-sewn, hand-tailored curtains from the early 60s almost certainly done on an old treadle machine (if you sew, you can tell). They were beautiful, so we kept them... and also, well, free curtains for weird-shaped windows. Have you SEEN the price of a set of nice curtains? Holy crap.

#resources #resource #1890s #1900s #1910s #1920s #1930s #1940s #1950s

[tirsynni]

Years ago (crazy to think about how many years, honestly), I started Sands of Time as writing practice to see if I could get into the practice of writing on a regular schedule (it failed). I had a bunny inspired by thinking too much about Ganondorf and his role in OoT and WW, decided it was as good as an excuse as any to work on writing regularly (failed so hard), and it ended up becoming a love letter to a game series which I've loved almost my entire life.

That fic kept going and going and taught me so much about writing, both in general and fanfic-specific. It ended up being far longer than planned, more detailed than planned, and even when I was distracted and tired and side-eyeing this massive WIP, it reminded me of how much I loved the Zelda games and the many details, overt and subtle, in them. Writing was more than just putting words on paper: it was translating the things I was passionate about. Even if there are some definite issues in the fic due to the many distractions occurring during its creation and how sometimes I wrote less because I was passionate to write and more because I was just stubborn about seeing the fic through, it's still a fic I'm very proud of. It is also, without a shadow of a doubt, my most popular fic. It is a fic that someone refused to rec because they wanted to hit lesser known Zelda fics, and holy shit, I preened when I read that.

I have been struggling with fic and fandom in the last year for many reasons, including some serious RL stressors. The other big reasons have to do with the evolution of fandom itself. I'm not talking about the rise and fall of the popularity of certain things. For example, while I'm not a fan of "reader" fic, I feel like it's a fantastic example of the things that can be done with the fanfiction medium and also a way to explore how tropes/genres/random things in fanfiction reflect different cultural changes in the same way horror movies do. What I hate, though, is the rise of negative feelings and negative takes in fandom, transforming it from a fun, collaborative atmosphere into an arena full of witch hunts, deliberately bad takes, and people terrified to write because they are afraid of being attacked for their content, pairing, writing styles, grammar, etc. I love fandom as a love letter to canon, an exploration of canon, an exploration of self and writing styles, among other things. Now it feels like it's no longer that.

Back in the Old Days, people put disclaimers on fics because they didn't want to be sued. Now people put disclaimers on things assuring readers that of course they don't advocate these things, these things are bad, they know it, they aren't a criminal, they aren't a pedophile, they aren't a Bad Person. Now I see people skip summaries just to tell people to stop attacking them for their pairing and to just let them write what they like.

I see people indulging in deliberate bad takes of the original content, of the original creators, of other writers in fandom, of different tropes, of game mechanics... fucking everything. Sometimes it's just a nasty circle. Sometimes it's done to elevate something else, because we all know the only way to elevate something is to put something else down. I understand vent sessions. I understand going to a friend and going "Holy shit, did you see that summary??? Wow!" It should stop life as a quick vent. It shouldn't make up the person's entire personality. It shouldn't require a full online presence. Hate should never be detailed in the comments. Call-out posts should be left to actual nazis, terfs, etc., not to someone who wrote a "gross" or "unhealthy" or whatever pairing. Seriously. If you waste so much time on that, you need to look into some self-exploration and therapy. In all sincerity.

Fanfiction is not a published work. It should be fun. It is put online to be shared with fellow fans. It is something where someone gets excited about something or has an idea about something or wants to explore something or just wants to write some kinky porn and then share it with fellow fans. That's why writers post work and then sit eagerly .02 seconds later waiting for people to comment on it because they want to share their thoughts and love and happiness and excitement and sadness and grief and their general emotions with others and they want those others to respond and share their thoughts and reactions, too!

I just saw a post tearing into Moffat's Sherlock series because it lacked sincerity for the audience and source material and instead indulged in its arrogance, contempt, and self-righteousness. My immediate thoughts turned to the Lord of the Rings movies. If Sherlock is remembered, it will be purely in the critical sense, an example as to how a popular series was forgotten and dismissed. LotR remains loved. It is a classic. It is something people repeatedly marathon despite the lengthy watch time. LotR was a love letter to its source material. It wasn't just the writers and directors: everyone involved was sincerely, fiercely passionate about it, and it shows. It drags the watchers in, prompted people who had never read the original to pick up the books, inspired so much fanfiction. It was sincere and passionate and loving and, in turn, its fans are sincere and passionate and loving.

The LotR movies explored and loved the genre, the characters, the message. Even when characters faltered, it didn't make them terrible people. It made watchers hold their breath, it made watchers cheer them on, it made watchers hope. Check out people who do bad takes of Frodo and his struggle with the Ring and watch how many people come out of the woodwork to defend Frodo. There was no tongue-in-cheek humor mocking the source material. There was no critical analysis of "Well, you see, this is how the hero was actually stupid." No. It was sincere. It was loving. It still makes people cry and cheer and happy even when they're wiping away a sad tear or two.

I've read fanfics where the writers insist on the worst takes for the characters. It isn't done out of humor or a teasing love or an exploration into the characters/writing styles/etc. The writers want to drag the characters down, put themselves on a pedestal, and do it not through sincere analysis but by doing the worst possible takes on the situation. This usually relies on going into the source material with a negative mindset and desiring negativity in return, feeding primarily on the negative takes of others rather than looking into the source material or looking for positive takes, or just having a "bad faith" mindset. They go into it with an axe to grind and want to drag everyone else down with them. It isn't one or two fics: it's a growing, poisonous movement which is one of the things driving people out of fandom. It isn't a love letter to the source material. It is hate and disgust and contempt and Moffat writing Sherlock, patting himself on the back all the while and surrounding himself with people doing the same exact thing.

I'm a strong believer in people writing whatever they want to write. You want to write this character being evil? Sure! You hate this character and want to make them OOC to bash them even more? Go for it! I've written so many things testing how far I could go or feeling angsty and wanting others to feel angsty or even feeling happy and grinning like a feral gremlin as people wrote comments talking about how the angst in the story made them bawl. Want to write vore? Want to write character death? Whatever! It is fucking fiction, and it should be something you can enjoy doing. Hell, an asexual person can write two people fucking without wanting to get fucked. A lesbian can write two men fucking. A pacifist can write a murder mystery. It is fiction. Write whatever you want, and I hope that you feel better after doing so, even if it is only in the catharsis way of having a bad day and getting it out by making characters bleed.

Already, I can fucking hear people insisting that all of this makes you a bad person. No. No. If you truly believe that, it means you don't understand writing. You don't understand art. OR it's not a misunderstanding but a deliberate Bad Take, an extension of the poison I described above, because you want to attack someone and you want any opening. See: Republicans going after Drag Queens now, probably not actually believing that Drag Queens are harmful but recognizing vulnerability and knowing they can manipulate others through hatred. If you truly believed that, you would be wondering about Stephen King and other writers, but instead, you use conservative attacks and uncritically promote purity culture and are oblivious to the day when the leopard turns around to eat your face.

It's exhausting. It's a growing trend that is poisoning the water that is fandom and is not only playing a part in driving people out, but is keeping people from ever trying their hand in the first place. It is keeping people from enjoying what should be a fun thing. It is fucking poisoning minds, because this is a damned slippery slope. Hammer/nail and all that. It is seeing one thing as "problematic" and knocking over one tile and then seeing a full domino effect because they never bothered to analyze what "problematic" meant or why they found that "problematic." It is people grabbing a torch with the hope they won't find themselves on the stake.

Let people enjoy fandom. Try having positive takes. Let fanfiction and fanart and fanworks in general be something enjoyable again. Maybe some people use it as a way to vent current political issues. Maybe some people want to explore certain sexual kinks and writing these two (or three or five or seven) characters going at it is a great way to do it. Maybe they had a funny thought and want to share it via fanfiction. Whatever. We can't go online and bash people like Moffat and then casually do the same exact thing. We can't bitch about conservative politicians attacking people and then use the same exact thought processes and methods to attack others.

Let people be sincere in their enjoyment. If you don't like it, find something you do like. Maybe take some time with some tools and explore things which make you happy instead of indulging in deliberate bad takes to tear others down and use those takes to bind yourself to others and their bad takes like barbwire. Remember why things like LotR lives on and makes people so happy and why Moffat's works are going to be used in classes in the future as to what not to do.

#rant #purity culture #fandom #this wasn't what the rant was supposed to be about #i got off topic #but i've seen some things lately #and they've enraged me #critical thinking #try it #instead of mindless #self-righteous #emotional responses #in all sincerity #that is how fucking TRUMP got elected #focusing on people's emotions #on their fear and hatred #on their need to fit in #or push other people down #on riling people up #so they didn't think #they literally had torches #c'mon people #went longer than i thought #oops

[dextixer]

Oh Dex, you don't get to pull the "I can't be bigoted, stalking, violent trash because I'm more leftist than you are" card.

I'm trans and an ancom and it's no secret that a lot of "ex" gg-ers tried to re-invent themselves.

Funny how it never works for long.

No one outside your diminishing echo chamber believes a word you say.

Actually, that is just wrong. Me being leftist has nothing to do with me not being bigoted. Im simply... Not bigoted. The reason why i point out my leftist "credentials" is to prove through my ACTIONS why you people are fake progressives.

You gave me labels. You are trans and an ancom. Okay. Why should i care? I dont care about your labels (I stopped caring about them during the invasion of Ukraine when people started using the "pacifist" and "anti-imperialist" labels to argue for Russian occupation of Ukraine). I care about actions.

So, let us all recall what YOU anti-RWDE people have done with your actions.

1 - During the RT controversies many of your people came in DEFENCE of RT, people like Lilith Fairen cursed out and attacked people on twitter for criticizing RT and afterwards your anti-RWDE crowd spread Kdins past shitty behaviour. Pointing out her past behaviour is not a problem. But you did so to protect a bigoted company.

2 - Your anti-RWDE crowd has called for people to support RT financially through merch and other such avenues. Showing that you care more for your show and a corporation than its workers.

3 - Multiple anti-RWDE people have been caught using slurs, people like Lilith using ethnic slurs while some of your other people have been caight using the word "ret*rd". One of your people, Darious uses an alt account to spread islamophobic and racist shit to Adel Aka and Vexed Viewer. I dont like their content. But the racist attacks on them come from YOUR crowd

4 - Multiple of your people have been caught faking accusations about others. Canonseeker, a person your anti-RWDE crowd is friendly with for example took issue with me slagging of NAZIS on twitter. Pretending that they were "RWBY fans". I dont know why he stated that Nazis were RWBY fans but you should ask him that.

5- Your anti-RWDE crowd constantly use language or tactics associated with the alt-right. Lilith Fairen often weaponizes an alt right tactic when people call out racism/sexism, to them accuse the accusers of these things. Some of your people freely use the word "degener*te" which is HEAVILY associated with far right ideologies.

6 - Most of your biggest attacks have been against people of colour and sexual minorities. You dont go after chuds. Your MAIN targets are specifically women, people of colour, and those of non-straight sexualities. And that is no coincidence. Hell, quite recently one of your leaders, Lilith straight up made an entire paragraph which just reeked of white saviour syndrome.

7 - It is only from YOUR anti-RWDE crowd that i have gotten shit for supporting Ukraine in their defence against a Russian invasion. No single critic of RWBY has EVER given me shit for that. Only RWBY fans. Why is that?

Need i go on? The reason why i call you fake progressives is not due to the labels you hold. But due to your behaviour. The BEST you can levy in accusations against RWDE people is making shit up.

Xel Writer/Zam/Xelianthought for example is hanging around twitter claiming that the Canonseeker expose document was made with the help of Kiwifarms knowing that its a lie. He wanted to get my Reddit account deleted through false accusations that Lilith wanted to get onto too. Your friend canonseeker is coming up with real life fanfiction about me "controling" RWBY youtubers and r/RWBY mods.

The best you can do are either lies or shouting "YOU ARE SEXIST/RACIST/HOMOPHOBE" with absolutely no proof.

While your, anti-RWDE behaviour has been recorded to be fucking horrible. And none of you ever apologized or even acknowledged the things you have done. None of you have acknowledged or apologized for using slurs. None of you have apologized for defending RT.

You doubled down on that shit.

Also, if you dont care what we say. Why in the fuck do you keep hounding us? Why do i receive nearly daily asks of harassment? Why do you keep talking about us? If nobody believes us or listens to us. Why do you care?

See? Your attacks are so transparent its funny to me. Because in your whole "Nobody cares about you spiel" you reveal just how much of a pain we are to you people. Good.

#rwby #rwde #rwby community #rwby critical #toxic fndm #rwby fndm #fake progressive #canonseeker #rwby ask

[eldritchwhispersofficial]

TRIBETWELVE HEADCANONS/ ALTERNATE UNIVERSE INCOMING (TW: Nazis, mental illness, A literal eldritch demon, and lots of murder and blood+gore)(It's TribeTwelve, what did you expect)

BOOM GUESS WHO JUST READ SEBASTIAN'S JOURNAL http://slendermanarkive.wikidot.com/journal-of-sebastian-kraus I DID THATS WHO HERE COME THE FUCKING HEADCANONS FOR MY AU (Lilacverse) THAT I PROMISE I WILL WRITE MORE ON AS SOON AS MY MENTAL HEALTH DOES A REPAIR Sebastian Kraus

Depression! Also, ANXIETY! Also, PTSD!!!

Needs therapy + a hug

Not ACTUALLY a bad person, despite being a N*zi.

Was more or less forced into joining the N*zi Party due to a number of factors: societal pressure, peer pressure... oh, and the need to hide the fact that his beloved Anna is Jewish.

Anna is Jewish in this AU. Sebastian joined the N*zi Party solely to protect her- after all, who would suspect the wife of a N*zi officer to be a Jew? The perfect cover up. Sebastian did not agree with the massacre of the Jews, of course, especially since his wife is one, but it was either join the N*zis or flee the country. And they couldn't flee the country because...

Anna was pregnant. Yep. And the stress of having to flee her homeland would have been VERY, VERY bad for her. Not to mention that she had several relatives who she simply COULDN'T leave behind. Between the pressure to join from all of Sebastian's friends and the pressure of the Third Reich being in total control of Germany, it was only a matter of time before either Anna had a nervous breakdown or the N*zis discovered she was a Jew.

Just in case someone happened to read his journal, Sebastian wrote down all that stuff about enjoying being a N*zi. That way, no one would suspect him of secretly despising the party and what they stood for.

The fact that Anna died anyway (her neck was ripped open by the Administrator) shook Sebastian entirely to his core. He was already regretting not fleeing the country with her when he had the chance, and this just made everything he had done seem useless.

Sebastian succumbed to the Administrator, becoming the proxy known as Swain.

Swain is known as the Lover, because he loved Anna more than anything. Lars Mueller (Henka Visae)

He is the Nationalist, because he loves Germany. Not the N*zi Party, Germany.

Lars grew up hearing about how Germany was in the old days, before all of the atrocious leaders they had. He wanted to change the country. To fix it.

He joined the Nazi Party, not because he agreed with their ideals, but because he disagreed with their ideals. He became a spy for the Allied forces, using the code name Henka Visae and reporting information back to the Allies.

He accidentally developed a friendship with Sebastian.

He was inHABITed for part of the war, while HABIT was trying to stop the N*zis from summoning Gorr'Rylaehotep and basically ending life as we know it. Lars was simply the most convenient host.

This led to Lars having a breakdown and believing he was Henka Visae. Which led to him getting shot by Sebastian and proxified by the Administrator.

Ended up joining Novus Ordo Europa to spy on their doings. Karl Maxwell

Jewish.

Frequently punches N*zis.

Sat in a tree with a sniper rifle and witnessed Sebastian's camp being destroyed by the Administrator with an expression of "What the actual fuck" on his face.

Initially hated Sebastian and Lars but then felt really bad for them after finding out neither of them actually wanted to be in the Third Reich and hated the N*zi party.

The reason Sonya and Tommy drowned was because Karl went for Sebastian's journal in order to keep it out of the hands of the Collective. Lars tried to rescue Sonya and Tommy, but failed. Karl was upset with him for a long time, but eventually forgave him after realizing he couldn't possibly hold Lars more accountable than he held himself.

Karl was the very first person to know that Milo was a trans woman. Even before she told Kevin or Noah. He supported her immediately.

He isolated Mary for two reasons: to keep the journal out of her hands, and because he believed keeping his identity as Persolus a secret from her would make the Administrator less likely to hurt her. He resents her for the horrible person she became, but also resents himself for never being there for her. He did better with Sharon, at least.

Has killed multiple members of Novus Ordo Europa (The Order). Resents Mary for joining them, and is disgusted with her for dragging Milo into this whole mess.

For a long period of time, no one knew where Sebastian's journal had gone. Karl hid it in a location that was nearly impossible to find, and used Severance to literally sever his memories of it. This is what eventually led to his senility. By sheer accident, Patrick Andersen found it. HABIT warned him not to read it and convinced him to send it to him. HABIT read the journal himself, realized "hmm, Noah's probably going to need this someday." and mailed it back to Karl so it would eventually end up in the right hands.

Karl gave the journal to Milo because he knew she was destined to be Scars, and would kill Cursor. He wanted her to set things right.

#slenderverse #tribetwelve #karl maxwell #sebastian kraus #lars mueller #sebastian my beloved #sebastian deserved better #lars deserved better #karl deserved better #swain tribetwelve #deadhead tribetwelve #persolus tribetwelve

[pebblysand]

i haven't done this in a while. i used to be very intent on getting these extended a/n-s over the line at the same time as the chapter, which then ended up taking too much time. however, having recently seen the lovely @whinlatter do them for her own fic (also whose template i'm entirely plagiarising, sorry), it's inspired me to do this again. forgive my lateness.

acknowledgements: i would like to extend my most sincere thanks to @turanga4, @welsh-green, @whinlatter, @btelling, @ala-baguette, @greenhousethree, @uncontainedhybrid and everyone else on discord. you have allowed me to vent about All The Things, to pretty much use all of you as sounding boards for this chapter, and have answered my strange questions about air conditioning and automatic vehicles. truly, this chapter would not have been possible without you.

wordcount: let's not talk about it.

soundtrack: i feel like there was a just lots of music for this chapter. there are obviously all of the songs that are mentioned in universe: my name is, californication, here with me, wannabe (oh, the music of the 90s) and the oh-so-amazing bongo bong song which, i have discovered, never actually charted in the US (a crime, as far as i'm concerned). but also a lot songs that i listened to on loop at different times while writing this. caravane and young as the morning, old as the sea (two absolutely gorgeous travel songs), iris (the first-dance song of every wedding ever before ed sheeran took over), the seer's tower - jamie cullum's cover (idk how to describe this song. the cover is so beautiful and creepy at the same time. it's one of my favourite jamie cullum covers), what they'll say about us (an incredibly sad but beautiful love song - idk it's just #vibes), it's called: freefall (a tiktok cover i actually fucking love - love the singer as well, she's the same person who sings labour - and which i totally plagiarised in-text), and what is love? (which i also plagiarised lol). they are all on the castles playlist.

what is this chapter about? sex. love. the intersection of.

this is long and spoilery, so putting it behind the cut.

genesis:

i've honestly rarely been scared by the white blank page as much as i was before starting to write this chapter. i think this was due to a number of things: taking three months off writing (and wondering if i'd be able to pull it off again - i always worry, for some reason), but also this idea that this chapter was such a big ... aeroplane that i needed to land. i remember talking about it on discord a few weeks back, this idea that i'd built up so much, with this story, that i'd set up so much, and now having to deliver something that would be realistic, true to the spirit of castles (#sexandfunerals), but also fun and loving and healing. whilst, as i've said before, this story isn't about a relationship (i know a lot of you would like it to be, but i'm sorry, this is not about harry and ginny), it is a relationship that is obviously important. to the plot, to the characters, to the picture of the post-war world i'm trying to build. to me, doing justice to that relationship is essential in order to also do justice to the other elements of the story (the politics, the friendships, the feminism, the rebuilding of life, really). i've always seen love and romance as a part of life, and therefore as a part of fiction. and, i think i just wanted to treat it with the reverence it deserves.

as a result, i quickly made the decision that this chapter was going to be "just" about harry and ginny. the reason for that is three-fold:

first, narratively speaking, i wanted chapter sixteen (and, no, the fact that 8x2=16 is not a coincidence) to be a direct response to chapter eight. they both intervene as the beginnings of a new act (act two for chap 8, act three for chap 16), and exist in a place that's kind of outside of the "normal" time and space continuum of the fic. chapter eight is technically set in january '99, but it's really set in... ginny's letters. reality almost fades in favour of ginny's words and tale, making the chapter feel like it's almost happening right there and then. the actual reality of what is going on as harry is reading the letters is almost non-existent. it's a bit the same with sixteen. sixteen is an interlude, away from "reality" (london, the politics, everything). and, that's what i wanted it to be. i wanted it to be both the exact same, but also the exact opposite of chapter eight. and, i obviously wanted it to deal with the events of chapter eight, but in a tender, healing way. i had a whole conversation about this with @celestemagnoliathewriter on the podcast where we discussed how, in my opinion, once you deal with these very sensitive issues (non-con, SA, rape, etc.) in a work, you sort of owe it to your reader, too, to show that journey and to show what consensual sex can look like, too. and that, to me, was also the way this chapter was framed as a response to chapter eight. i wanted it to be about sex - but in a positive way.

secondly (and, obviously, this is very self-serving) - harry and ginny aren't the main focus of this story. their relationship is part of it, but not all of it. as i've said above, this is #shippygen territory. therefore, i unfortunately can't spend All My Time on this. so, in a purely technical sense, it felt more "efficient" to me to spend an entire chapter dedicated to them, get most of the rebuilding and relationship admin "done" in one chapter so that i could move on to other things. this obviously does not mean that there will be no romance/relationship stuff in the other chapters moving forward (there's tonnes) but it means that i've laid the ground work, you know? and although this chapter is 22k (sorry) i think it would have taken me a lot more time and energy to lay that same groundwork efficiently, had i not dedicated an entire chapter to it.

lastly, i think there was also a bit of me that was like: i want to write romance. which i know is strange. most of you don't know me as a writer of romance, but i also am. before HP, my entire "trade" was basically shippy fics. i enjoy it, i find it fun, and so i wanted to write it.

(below, a few individual points i thought i could talk about, in no particular order)

the american roadtrip:

as explained above, when i started to think about what the rebuilding of H&G's relationship would look like (which obviously happens throughout act 2 but really materialises in this chapter) i came to this conclusion that i wanted to have this chapter be a little bit of an interlude "outside" of normal life. and, as i've also said this before, my favourite niche sub-genre of post-war fics are fics that include travel. i mean, what can i say? i'm a traveler, i love going places to explore. i'm on a plane at least once a month. and, i've always had a soft spot for stories where harry "fucks off" and goes travelling somewhere, with or without ginny, to heal. for the record, here is a selection of my favourites:

the grown up driver by pocketfullof ; venn diagrams of one circle by aceofdiamonds ; warm front by flagpoles ; maps to the stars' homes by lizbee ; beauty lays behind the hills by meliebee

and so, obviously, when it was time to create this chapter in my head, the idea of a road trip came very naturally to me. i was like: i need them to focus on "them", i need them away... let's take them away, you know? i'd always sort of dreamed of writing one of those travel fics, and so it was so, so nice to realise that castles itself was going to give me the opportunity to do that. super self-indulgent, but oh, so enjoyable. it came at the cost of a little "suspension of disbelief" (sure, they're going to drive a car even though they can apparate ; sure, harry can just fuck off from his job for two months ; and sure, the fact that Quidditch season starts just at the end of september when i need it to is a total coincidence lol) but you know, who cares? i hope you did suspend your disbelief, lol.

now, on the choice of the US: i feel like the US is obviously the quintessential "road trip" destination, but i did consider others. i also toyed with australia for a while, south africa, canada and argentina. i ended up ruling out the first three pretty quickly because a) i've never been to australia or south africa and b) i have been to canada but never driven there. as you now know from our research episode on the podcast, anything that requires me to do extensive amounts of research is an automatic no (lol), so. the only one that really held some ground against the US was argentina because i love the country so much, we did drive around quite a lot when i was there, and i felt like there was a lot of potential for magical worldbuilding. but my issue was a) i went to argentina in early 2020 so i felt like the country was probably very different from what it would have looked like in 98 (coming back to our #idontwannadoresearch issue) and b) i would have kind of needed to change the timing of the trip if i wanted them to go in summer. i really considered this, i felt like there wouldn't be that much difference in having them go away over christmas rather than july/august/sep, and i feel like flying over Mount Fitz Roy or Perito Moreno rather than the Grand Canyon would have been equally spectacular, so the research part was really what did it for me in the end. i've just been to the US so much. i lived there for a year. i also have a lot of friends there who i can ask stuff to about the late 90s if i need to. it was just... easier. H&G will go to argentina for their twentieth anniversary or something lol.

now this being said, dearest americans, i hope you forgive me for... roasting your country a bit? in good spirit, i promise. i love the US. the US is just... funny, you know? what's with the aircon everywhere? and omg the state of your roads. buffalo is a shithole, i will not apologise for that, i have been there too many times. it was just so much fun to write this from harry and ginny's perspective, build in some little quirks they would have noticed. the trelawney bean joke. that and the line "This is the late 90s - there’s still something sort of “aspirational” about it." will never not make me laugh. what the fuck is happening to this country right now? do you need a hug? it was also fun to wonder what magical life would look like there. i think what i built is very inspired by what i could find on pottermore, although i did sort of pick and choose what i liked. and also fuck, the grand canyon is literally the most beautiful place on earth.

lastly, sorry to all of the areas i didn't mention. i initially wanted to get them to loop around but of their own accord, they decided to go at a really slow pace so i decided to scratch the north west and the south east. i really wanted them to drive down the coast from seattle to LA, but alas. they'll come back later, i promise lol.

harry and ginny:

i think, honestly, all i have to say about them is in the chapter (and, if it's not, it'll surely be in my asks, lol). my babies. i think what i really wanted this chapter to be was like: them, talking. face to face, not through letters. just existing together. joking around. confessing things. arguing, sometimes (as we all probably must). in light of the many comments i've received over the last 48 hours (for which i cannot thank you enough), it seems that that was achieved. obviously, castles is also very much about sex and so i wanted this chapter to be about them rebuilding that, too. harry has this strange mental block, of course, which is him being terrified of basically being "like" Amycus and forcing her into something she doesn't want and also fearing that she actually doesn't want them to be together. it's hard to believe someone who's lied to you in the past, regardless of their reasons. it's hard to be told "yes, you did make me think of him" and build past that. i also really want this to be a callback to last summer where, as harry says himself:

Last summer, everything was difficult but the sex was always the one thing that worked, between them, and now everything is better but every time his hands are on her skin, he freezes. He wants to slam the car into a tree like that will shock him into living.

i wanted this chapter to not only show the struggles, but them actually working through the struggles. communicating. and, i don't know if you've noticed, every time they do "argue," they sort of get better at it. at first, they have this fight about bodycount (see below for more on that) where neither of them is actually a) talking about what they're really talking about, b) saying what they want to say and c) talking about what they should be talking about. then, slowly, carefully, they communicate better and better to the point that when they "fight" inside the car before grand canyon, it's not really a "fight" and more of a reflection on how to solve a very practical problem.

@gardenroses1 said something in her comment this morning which really intrigued me and is something i genuinely didn't plan for or notice: every time H&G fight, they do it following some sort of "external" intervention. either the press (prior to the bodycount fight) or the millers family (prior to the "i want to believe you" fight). it's true, was totally unintentional, but also feels super interesting and goes to what i felt in my gut prior to this chapter: that they needed to go away to truly focus on rebuilding this. again, i feel like their foundations are strong enough, now, that when the outside world attacks them again, they will know how to respond better. but, i thought this was a very good point to note!

the line:

He wonders if girls just get better at reading people because their lives depend on it. 

this was quoted back to me a few times in my comments and so i thought i should maybe talk about it a bit. or at least, acknowledge it. i actually don't particularly like that line, i tried many times to phrase it better, gave up and almost deleted it, verifying once again this strange phenomenon that @btelling and i have recently identified where, whenever we seem to think like a line is too on the nose and almost delete it, it becomes the line that everyone loves, lol.

i mean, this reflects what it says on the tin, right? if castles is one thing, it's the place for me to push my feminist agenda (lol) so there you go. smashing the patriarchy one line at a time.

on "bodycount":

if you were following this tumblr last summer, you will remember this: i used to get a lot of asks about ginny's sex life. stuff like: wouldn't harry be mocked because ginny slept around? and: wouldn't harry feel insecure about ginny sleeping around? and even once: what's ginny's bodycount? (if you don't believe me, look through here). often (though not always) these were formulated quite rudely (which actually led me to implement the politeness policy) and i must admit, i wasn't always super nice, myself, answering these. i think they just sort of puzzled me. given the themes of this fic, i tend to think of my audience as liberal, feminist women in their 20s & 30s, which made it all the more shocking to get questions from people who were clearly not part of that demographic. the way the concept of "loose women" and "bodycount" is inherently tied with the control of women's sexuality by the patriarchy should be news to no one, reading this. and, i mean, on the one hand, sure, these were legit questions given the society we live in, but not ones i would necessarily expect to be asked, you know? i think especially the bodycount one really surprised me.

the first iteration of this chapter included the whole issue of sex (i.e. harry not wanting to "force" her, etc.) but the bodycount talk was actually a later addition. i don't know where it came from. i remember i was actually writing a whole bunch of conversations that were to occur before the road trip (and ended up being moved around into the road trip for the most part) and harry and ginny just started ... talking about it. it was very sweet and cute and him basically telling her he didn't care. i kind of liked it and sent it to @btelling as a sort of "look what my anons make me write" thing but then i was like: wait a minute, i think there's potential for more here. i remembered there was this idea that stemmed from the anons i was getting that was like: harry will be insecure about her sleeping around and i was like: i mean, maybe, but what about her though? because for a girl who's barely 18 and still probably very much affected by patriarchal ideas, having been through what she's been through, it's like: well, what is he going to think about me, right? and, she kind of asks him what he thinks in chapter 14 and he's like a) telling her he doesn't care/mind and b) that he is a bit insecure, too, which i think alleviates her concerns a bit until, well, he doesn't seem to want to sleep with her, right? and she's like: wait, were you lying? and, i think for ginny as well, she sort of wants it to be about that because if it's not that, it's the fact that she "slept" with amycus that's putting him off, which is much more serious and traumatic for her.

as i said above, i loved writing that fight in the hotel room. i realised that the cute and sweet conversation i has originally written could be turned into an argument very easily by just changing the tone, which definitely was a good sign. and having harry snap: i didn't ask the next day was so enjoyable. he thinks he's saying the right thing by saying he doesn't care, but that's not what she wants to hear. she wants him to care, because for her it's a part of her that isn't "perfect" and she wants him to know about it and accept it, rather than ignore it. and getting to resolve that misunderstanding was just so satisfying.

lastly, i've had comments telling me 28 wasn't a lot. she's barely 18. this happened over the span of 3 months-ish. i don't care if it's a lot or not a lot and the fact that people have an opinion about that is just fucking gross.

ah, the patriarchy 🙄.

miscellaneous:

you have @btelling and @turanga4 to thank for the fact that i kept R&H's wedding. this chapter was so long, i genuinely considered deleting the first 5k. i also considered doing two chapters (one for the wedding and one for the road trip) but those would have been annoyingly uneven. i hope you enjoyed lol.

the flight over grand canyon was almost a flight over the Great Lakes. initially, it was grand canyon. then, that felt like too much time as i was going north then south so i changed it and decided to have them sleep together right after the upper peninsula (which, by the way, not making the trip upstate when i lived in michigan is my biggest regret - this was just me getting to go there by proxy). but then, when i got to that point, idk, it didn't ... work? and, when i'd made the change, although the great lakes region is gorgeous, i was super upset to not get the grand canyon sights, so i changed it back. i think it was just better in terms of scenery and timing in the end.

speaking of the grand canyon.... i used chatGPT to describe it LOL. or, at least get inspo on how to describe it. as we know, i'm not very visual so while i have been there, it's always difficult for me to describe the grandiosity of something. so i prompted chatGPT to describe the grand canyon at night to me in a "romantic" way and TA-DA. honestly, i only took a couple of sentences from the few paragraphs it gave me, but it was just good to get the juices going. i thought i'd mention it cause i don't think all AI is evil.

if you've listened to the podcast episode on romance, you'll notice a few references to the ep (When he opens his eyes again, their palms let go of each other and they stumble, landing inside their motel room. A rough transition between the grandiose and the mundane, and a bed that protests loudly whenever they move, and carpet that reeks like centuries-old cigarettes.) i was editing the ep whilst editing castles so i thought it was fun to play with the discussion @copper-dust and i had had a little bit.

i think H&G will go on one annual trip per year now. just somewhere. they deserve it lol.

aaand, that's it for me. this was way longer than i thought it would be lol.

if you have any questions, let me know ❤️

#castles #chapter 16

[compassionatereminders]

hi, i hope its okay if i vent here cause i know shits been rough for you lately (wishing you the best btw, which ik simply saying that doesnt magically make things better but hope yk what i mean)

i sent an asks a few months ago about having empathy for someone for the first time and really struggling to come to terms with it, how to deal with new overwhelming emotions and the like (i believe i also mentioned them being in an abusive situation at the time, which was a whole other complicated feeling to empathize with someones pain and to take it internally on levels i had never experienced or was capable of fathoming before in my entire life)

currently struggling with that person again, they left their original abusive situation but have entered a new complex one, as this person isnt intentionally shitty but they're rich, white passing and extremely privileged and out of touch, like truly they don't grasp my friends trauma and why it makes things hard for them (friend has gone through severe abuse and childhood trauma, neglect and homelessness just to say the light ones, its truly awful what they've been through) despite having some trauma of their own and i truly fucking despise them with my entire being

my friend is abusing alcohol and debating killing themselves due to this person dangling ending their relationship over my friends head --- (which is another thing thats complex and hurting, my friend never told me they were dating which like they totally dont have to obviously!! but they continuously insisted to me they were only friends, before suddenly revealing through a screenshot of their partners text that they were together, which they did with their previous abuser so like having it happen twice was icky feeling for some reason despite the fact ik they don't owe me that information at all, i dont care they hid it i just feel hurt and confused if i had done something to warrant not being trusted with that information but thats a whole other can of worms) --- due to them struggling to do something the person wants, because my friend has trauma what the person is requesting is hard and my friends explained why its hard and hurts them, they've thrown up daily from the stress and this person knows that but somehow doesnt grasp why its causing my friend such distress

i feel utterly suffocated by the entire situation and its put my life on full stop because i cant just leave my friend to deal with this themselves, but theres nothing i can say or do that can help them because they're deeply in love and won't break up with their partner even though the stress is physically ruining them. i feel hopeless and unable to do anything, i encourage them to talk to me because really i wanna be there for them but i feel so scared all the time that somethings gonna happen to them which makes me need to listen even more because their other friend is horribly abusive and contributed to their trauma, so i don't wanna leave my friend alone. i don't know how to deal with empathizing with their pain and not being able to stop it feels like its killing me cause now im also throwing up multiple times a day, genuinely debating drug relapse to cope with it all and i can't sleep properly anymore and only sleep on specific 4 hour intervals throughout the day next to my phone so i can be on constant standby for the friend and i know its not healthy and if they knew it was like this they'd never tell me whats wrong again (which i really dont want i truly honest to god wanna be there for them), i feel like no matter how i go about it theres no winning in this situation and honestly i wanna die from it all which sounds so silly cause my friend is going through SO much worse and here i am going waaah this hurts me!! i just eugh, i don't know what to do. which i guess i know what to do, but i don't wanna do any of it i've never cared about someone like i care about them and the thought of leaving them to sort it out themselves feels like the end of the world, even though i know they're also a sociopath and don't feel empathy towards me which is also a new shitty feeling cause now i know how people feel around me. this is exhausting i don't know how people with empathy deal with it especially you kat!! if i remember correctly you mentioned being very empathetic, it's amazing you're able to handle having empathy and running a blog where people often dump stuff in your inbox (which uh is the very same thing im doing now, sorry!) ok i got it all out of my system i'm gonna go take a nap and hope the problem is solved tomorrow (it wont be but a bitch can hope!!) thank you for being a space where i could word vomit my brain out, i really hope things get better for you and that your eye gets sorted out <3

No matter how unwell your friend is, you're allowed to have boundaries and limits. And while I get the desire to be there and do everything you can because you care about your friend, you will not be able to continue pouring from an empty vessel. This is not a sustainable situation. You neglecting yourself and not sleeping and getting physically ill and wanting to die is not an acceptable consequence of your friend being in a toxic relationship without being able to change their situation. I know you didn't ask for advice, but I strongly encourage you to establish some boundaries here and stand by them. You do not lose your right to have boundaries when a loved one is mentally unwell and if you do not prioritize your own mental well-being, you will not be able to continue being there for you friend

#chat with kat #abuse tw #alcohol tw #trauma tw #addiction tw #suicidal ideation tw #suicide tw #vomit tw #drugs tw #homelessness tw

[andmyvape]

You know...

People talk about drugs like if you give someone who wants them whatever drug they're asking for in whatever amount they're asking for, they'll become hopelessly addicted and ruin their lives

Now I'm not arguing that addiction isn't fucking awful but I fervently believe those in the newer circles of rehabilitative care theory that are putting forward the idea that addiction, at its core, is self medication. Unregulated, self destructive self medication in too many cases, but it's not the drugs themselves in so many cases, huffing paint thinner and other examples not withstanding, but honestly I don't think people would do that if they had alternatives that ARE less damaging.

It's the pain and lack of support that drives so many people to alleviate their pain or stress which really is just pain too by numbing it with drugs. It helps, but they don't regulate, they don't find alternatives to cope with whatever they're medicating that lighten the need for the medication alone, their tolerance builds up, they don't know what they're medicating enough to know how to do that consciously and more safely...

It's a nightmare that is truly systemic, not some moral failing or some contagion inherent to the human spirit. I can't currently think of any example of an organism that wouldn't practice homeostasis when outside of whatever range of normal function they're supposed to be in. Not for some philosophical or spiritual reason, in this sense specifically it is purely biological, and I find it to be DEEPLY disturbing that so many people I encounter in my life INSIST that being in constant discomfort is somehow a state to aspire to and be proud of. Being able to safely handle exiting a space that would provide you homeostasis means being able to MAINTAIN that homeostasis when you go elsewhere or do other things. It's NOT about giving in to the idea that if you prefer to be comfortable that you are somehow weak or inferior. That is not a mark of strength, it's a mark of how damaged a person is.

Grandpa, stop ranting about my generation not wanting to be "triggered" you literally JUST threw a hissy fit because they didn't have your slim jims at the corner store and the cashier wouldn't give it to you for free. Your comfort is predicated on unfairly demanding behaviors from others that is not being reciprocated in a worthwhile way. I don't think that's more valid than my being upset that a man who claims to love me is more interested in mocking a caricature of a trans person that isn't actually me. But I digress

The point my adhd ass is making here is that I think I understand a bit more about what I've been arguing this entire time. Not that I didn't understand it at all before so much as that I've been given new depth. I have a pain condition, possibly multiple, have my entire life, and I have always been rather fixated on whatever would alleviate that pain. When Tylenol stopped working, I stopped using it. Eventually I found marijuana which has done me WONDERS but I've been dealing with worsening health issues due to various reasons and it's not quite doing enough. I had to be taken off all my meds because of a bad interaction and in the month before we start reintegrating meds that might help, my doctor gave me benadryl

Now, I've been taking benadryl on and off for years for anxiety and insomnia. I can't do it long, some toxicity issue I think? Or organ failure. Can't remember right now. The guideline is a two week limit, and I've found by the end of that two weeks it is very hard for me to get the effect I need without running into the 300mg daily cap. And the times I've taken it before it hasn't done much but make me sleep eventually and relax for a few hours

That has changed. Now when I take my benadryl, I can feel it kick in like God Herself just grabbed me by the scruff of the neck, total limpness, the anxiety isn't GONE but it's so much more manageable. The cessation of pain is so fucking nice, which I understand is a HUGE component of addiction outside of the direct chemical alterations over time becoming unpleasant or downright agonizing to reverse. Being so uncomfortable and having it relieved that quickly is amazing. It doesn't make the problem that is causing me the stress or pain go away, but it does give me clarity of mind that lets me take action to make my life better, for myself and my loved ones

Now here's the kicker for me. I HAVE taken benadryl before, but when I did, my conditions were so unmanaged that it just really did not do THIS much. And at that time, I very much required things that were stronger, for both pain and mental distress. I was given them after some hospitalizations, begrudgingly, and surprise of surprises it helped me. I started to improve. Pretty significantly. Years later, they started making me sick, thus the meds having to be changed now, and honestly I was TERRIFIED because I thought the benadryl wouldn't be enough, like it was before, and I'd spend a month in agony. I was so wrong yall

So here's what I think, in my amateurishly educated opinion: if they had just given me the medicine I was asking for instead of taking my agency away in denying my medication that could have helped but could also have consequences that they felt weren't worth the risk. Maybe they were, maybe there weren't, but... Shouldn't that have been my choice? And I did eventually get put on something stronger, which led to me having the strength and spoons and clarity I needed to make changes over time that have led to me being able to be helped by the benadryl now. They couldn't have just handed me a bottle of percocet at 14 and said "Good luck!" because YES that would have been it's own kind of damaging, but I have trouble with authority, and at least the damage would have been mine to cause. After all, it was my body

But... What they could have done, what research is proving again and again ACTUALLY works more than patriarchal denial of bodily autonomy on the basis of my supposed "inherently and deeply lacking ability to make choices for my own health," is just... Giving me the meds I asked for. Tell me the risks, help me manage the potential consequences, trust me to tell you when I feel sick instead of functional. To not just keep taking more and more of whatever drug that is helping me but you've decided I'm having FUN with, to the point that being denied the care I needed was damaging. If you had trusted me, I would have trusted you, and we could have made a plan that would have probably resulted in what's happened now, me finding that benadryl actually is enough now and crying in sheer joy that I've finally worked hard enough to get this far

But that would have implied that I have an ability and right to make decisions about how to take care of my own body, right?

This isn't a story that hasn't been experienced and shared so many times that it all paints a detailed and disturbing tapestry of how little bodily autonomy matters in this system. Too many demographics are judged as being "at risk for addiction" without the judgement being made by people who care that those demographics are at risk because of so fucking many social and systemic inequalities that leave so fucking many deprived of preventative, proactive care that would ultimately ease the burden of emergency care that has to be given once things get to a point considered "bad enough" and that's just... Not okay.

#Mental health #Chronic pain #Addiction #This is a broken system #Lack of emphasis on bodily autonomy is one of the cores of this festering boil #I'm gonna grab a giant needle and start stabbing #Who's with me?

[goblins-riddles-or-frocks]

@doomsayings I had to make a separate post bc I have too much to say for a reply lmao. But I’M OBSESSED!! I literally only started Housewives to humor a friend but then it got me like immediately lol. I’m not current on either tbh tho. Housewives I’m on season… four? The one where Carlton and Joyce joined. And VPR I’m on season two. I’m trying to watch to keep up with both so that they’re like around the same time ish for any crossover content.

General thoughts, I’m in loooove with Lisa Vanderpump. She’s so sexy 😭😭😭 and she seems like the most genuine and normal of them? Hate that they’re all turning on her rn where I’m at in the season. Like leave her alone!!! She hasn’t done anything wrong ever.

Season one was really funny with the insane Kyle and Camille drama. Probably the only time Kyle has ever been justified imo sjdhdd. It was really cool how Camille turned around and became the least dramaful person over the subsequent seasons tho. Like she ended up leaving the show but Good For Her. It sounds like she had some like capital T Therapy and became way more mature and mellow.

Kyle was fun in like season one? But she’s been kind of pearl clutchy and annoying since idk. It’s good drama ig. But I’m neutral on her. I liked her relationship with Lisa a lot though rip it made a lot of sense why Lisa wanted to step back. And it’s been really funny how Kyle’s legit just acting like a jealous ex over it and being like “but why don’t you love me anymore :C” I was very 👀👀 when they kissed in Paris as a “joke” tho.

Adrienne seemed really chill and level headed at first at least next to the others and then got bizarrely touchy by the end. I love drama but hers seemed really petty all the time, so I was glad she left the show. Also she like transparently absolutely LOATHED her husband from the first episode, so I’m surprised it took her that long to get divorced.

Also past season but the Taylor thing was scary!!! It was insane seeing the “woman yelling at cat” meme in context and it’s like in the middle of her mental breakdown due to her abusive af husband.

I used to like Brandi a lot but she’s spiraled pretty bad? Like on intro she seemed genuinely really nice and just vaguely without a filter (same) and everyone was ganging up on her for objectively really minor things or interpreting her in bad faith all the time. But idk she got genuinely super racist with Joyce. And now she’s being mean to Lisa 💔

Carlton’s fun but insane. Love her weird goth house and how she and her husband are both clearly sleeping with the nanny. Also just all the very gay moments with Brandi and it’s hilarious how much she seems to hate Kyle for no reason?? Kyle could just be like “hi” and she’s like WHY WOULD YOU EVER SAY SOMETHING SO PASSIVE AGRESSIVE?? I’m sad to see her go but also shdhdfd she is just kind of crazy.

Joyce is meh. She’s just kind of boring. But very pretty. I am happy to stare at her. I know she doesn’t last past the one season either.

Yolanda seems deranged in her personal life but the most solid and reasonable in like the friend dynamic and when drama goes down. It’s really insane though how she’ll just say something completely crazy in passing and then gloss over it shdgd I think she also leaves soon? But she’s fun.

Kim’s also eh. She has soooo many issues but she handles them kind of annoyingly. Her life story is so fucked up and interesting though.

Re: VPR Stassi is probably my fave, she’s so messy 😭😭😭 That entire friend group is just awful! The way they have zero boundaries lmao. It’s like sitcom levels where they’re just together all the damn time. It also makes me feel better about adulthood lmao like these people act like insane teenagers!

Stassi is probs my fave. Love her mean girl energy. Scheana is vapid but probably like… the most solid friend? All the others are such assholes lmao. They never show up for each other!

I’m also not like there yet obvs but I have heard of Scandoval. So rn being at the point where Sandoval and Kristen break up (probably for good?) and the initial #vibes with Ariana, loosely knowing how it goes, is insaaaaane.

I also love every time there’s Housewives crossover, and they’re catering a party or something and are like “what the fuck is wrong with these rich people” shdhff like yeah.

So I’m having a great time! I love Mess!

#i ramble sometimes #doomsayings #reality tv thoughts #real housewives of beverly hills #rhobh

[itsybitsylemonsqueezy]

How do you rank the Yakuza games by story quality?

Welp, this will be opening up a can of worms, but to thank you for asking... (still leaving out both Judgment games because I'm a loser who hasn't played them) And obviously, this will get long, so much more under the cut:

First: Yakuza 0 -

You can all dunk on me for putting the popular choice first, but it's popular for a reason. The story stands on its own feet; if you never played another Yakuza game, you still got a satisfying story out of this. No dangling plot threads or criminally underutilized characters*. I think as a whole the series could have built more on these themes, I think Kiwami 1 does a little, which we'll get to in due course, but in general my biggest problem with Yakuza series writing is they adamantly refuse to view their writing as a story and only see it as a vehicle for a video game which... makes for some really questionable decisions. (* I know there are those who think more should have been done with Makoto or Nishitani living and there's room to argue here. It's half the reason to write fanfiction, but I think from a bird's eye view, we have a cohesive narrative where the stakes were fulfilled.)

Second: Yakuza 7 -

On the whole, this was a really solid entry writing wise. There's only a couple of missteps I see here and mostly they're to do with the very end. So, spoilers for the end of Yakuza 7, skip to the next point if you don't want to know. I think it would have been really cool if they'd just made Ichiban Black-Asian, but that's a personal quibble for me. I think crowbarring Kiryu in was... questionable and not really good??? For Ichiban??? But my biggest problem was killing Ryo, that was absolutely unneeded and kinda makes a mockery of Kiryu's entire arc. Like, Ichiban and Kiryu, as have oft been noted, are very different protagonists. Kiryu is haunted by the sins of his father and the death of his brother. These slowly eat Kiryu from the inside out (much like cancer) turning him bitter and away from the yakuza as a whole. We deal with these themes in every single game, more or less. That's not what Ichiban's set up to deal with. Ichiban from day 1 is Just Some Guy, started at the bottom now we're here. He's all about success and joy and loving life, especially in the face of adversity, and in particular, in the face of social convention. Killing his brother saddles Ichiban with deep guilt and grief over what could have been, should have been, or at least it should, right? Ichiban spends their last minutes together trying to save his soul and I think would have been successful if the writing hadn't fucked him at the last second. And just... why? What purpose does it serve? Tying up loose ends? I don't know how to explain this, but you actually can let a character's story be over without killing them. That's actually just a very normal thing you can do. And this is what I mean about viewing the story as a video game rather than as a story: the boss must be defeated, Ryo must die, whether or not that makes any fucking sense. And especially in the context of what Kiryu went through, this looks super fucking bad because I can almost guarantee we will never revisit any guilt or sorrow over that death in any future game. Like, we do the exact same thing, Ichiban traumatically loses a brother he had a fraught relationship with, just like Kiryu, but instead of changing him and his trajectory irrevocably it just... bounces off. Really, really bad choice, I do not care for it.

Third: Yakuza Kiwami 1 -

Haters gonna hate, but I love Kiwami 1. I think it's an excellent retelling and refinement of the first Yakuza while incorporating a lot of relevant details and character progress from Yakuza 0. If I was going to level a criticism at it, it would be that we still shy from letting Kiryu confirm his emotional tethers. For all that I think there's some very strong writing regarding what Kiryu cares about and what motivates him, at strange moments the writing will suddenly back down in a fit of cowardly homophobia and cling to just enough plausible deniability that they won't upset censors or alienate less subtextual readers. This goes hand in hand with the narrative cannot fucking figure out what to do with Majima. He's important! But not that important. He's Kiryu's closest friend and also they hate each other. Sometimes the narrative tries very hard to convince you It's Not Gay We Swear, The Rivalry Is So Straight And Malicious You Guys when two scenes before they lovingly stared into each others eyes while speaking deep personal truths for like a full three minutes, unblinking, unlaughing. And in the context of later games, it's weird to give Majima so much space in this game and in 0, to give him oodles of screen time, to make it very clear how close he and Kiryu are, and then frantically backtrack and nearly try to erase him from the narrative later, assure you he's Just Some Guy to Kiryu, after they've already painstakingly proved otherwise. It's frustrating, but certainly not a unique criticism. And I get that Majima has a big pull promotional wise, we all love the mad man, but... pick a lane. Either let him be Kiryu's one true love or stop messing with this shit, since it makes you so uncomfortable to imply otherwise.

Fourth: Yakuza 3 -

Okay, this game has really, really good writing actually! Yes, it drags in spots, but I think this game pulls off the greatest villain reveal of the whole series. It's really hard to reveal a villain's motives at the very end and have it resonate with the audience. And when you hear Mine say "Daigo is the only man I ever loved" it fucking makes sense. All his weird behavior, his barely contained rage, his psychotic choices... it all becomes crystal clear why as you see this picture of a man with the worst kind of self-esteem problems, who pinned the whole of his essence on someone else and cannot come to terms with the reality of human frailty. I make no apologies for being a huge fan of Mine and he's definitely the best written character in the game. This game still struggles with letting Kiryu put proper emotional weight on his core relationships, both with Majima and with Daigo specifically. And even with his orphanage, we introduce all those children but when do they ever matter? Yes, this is a yakuza game, Kiryu has to go out and fight people because this is a game and he's the protagonist, but then why have him retire to the beach at all if you're just going to have him come back, painlessly, every time?

Fifth: Yakuza 5 -

Oh, Yakuza 5, my ugly beloved. My swan song. My cherished disaster. Equal parts sublime and terrible. This is peak writing for Kiryu, of all the games, this one understands him the best. He's tired and sad and bitter, he's riddled with guilt and doing his best and his best is shit, and in the end he still tries to come home. God, this... this was the closest we ever came to letting Kiryu grow, letting him learn his lesson, letting him understand that dying like his father did and abandoning his family is not the fucking answer. Kiryu's arc in this game is so good, so earned, we even let him go bug fucking crazy at the idea Majima is dead, I could swoon. God, this was So Good, I will not hear any criticisms about Kiryu in this game, 10/10 Kiryu.

On the other hand, it has been well documented that I am a Mirei Park hater, RIP to her lovers, but I just hated every part of that. I think Majima was character assassinated this game. I understand that at the time, 0 and both Kiwamis didn't exist yet and so the writing is responding to this impulse that for Majima to work, for him to make sense, there has to be deep pain and tragedy in his background. But this was a catastrophic vehicle for it, it does not fit for him, and they did a 10/10 job in 0 so... that's the canon I believe. Semi-related, I don't love making Haruka an idol? Not only does she state in previous games that she's not interested in being an idol, but I just think it's a waste of her potential. I love her being a protag, I wish we could get MORE protag Haruka, god she deserves it, we deserve it. And I think there were many other ways we could have done that, I think this fell prey to a lack of imagination on the part of the writers. But, she does call her father home in the end and decide this isn't what she wanted after all so... I do love that. They snatched it back in the end.

And hey, we even got a fulfilling arc out of Saejima! Who knew! On balance, the writing of this game is really good, it just has a couple of critical failures for me. But mostly, expert characterization and finally allowing emotional weight to have its due. It's cruel of me to say, but I so wish the series had ended here. Or even hard reboot with 7, that's fine. Just... man. I wish we hadn't destroyed everything we did correctly here.

Sixth: Yakuza 4 -

Everyone loves to dunk on Yakuza 4 for being too complicated and difficult to understand. That actually doesn't bother me. I think the plot isn't that bad to follow and I think the introduction of non-yakuza members to the crime world, Akiyama and Tanimura, are really good world building. It helps to understand that there are forces that can impact what the yakuza do and what they are capable of doing. I think Daigo is 10/10 in this game, I think his mistakes are entirely justified, and I love how we have to deal with it.

What I don't love is Kiryu's amnesia from Yakuza 3, that those lessons seem to be entirely lost and have to be learned again. I don't love that there's no continuity of consequences, either from other games into this one or from this game into later ones. That's really my biggest problem with 4. That despite introducing fan favorites like Saejima and Akiyama, both of whom are executed really well and are excellent additions, the political tension and themes that I think are very coherent here don't have much impact on the later series. And maybe that was down to poor reception and people complaining that they didn't like the story. That could just be an artifact of serial publication and bending to the whims of public opinion. Again, for me that's an issue of viewing the story as a video game and product rather than maintaining loyalty to the story above all else. But that's my bias as a writer and as a professional academic when it comes to story.

Seventh: Yakuza 6 -

Full disclosure: I have almost no love for Yakuza 6. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth and a fog in my brain. I find it particularly egregious of erasing past lessons, of ignoring understandings we already had. I think it deliberately ignores emotional weight we already established and used. I loathe what we do with Haruka, that her entire autonomy is stripped from her and she is little more than a bauble used to torture Kiryu. I find the choices made for her at best perplexing and at worst deeply misogynistic and narrow. I hate that rather than use characters already long-established to deal with Kiryu's trauma regarding organized crime, family, brotherhood, and fatherhood, we introduce new people who do not matter and will never be seen again instead of resolving anything with the people we already know and care about. It feels like an incredible slap in the face to anyone who cared about those previous characters and the relationships they had with Kiryu.

Think about that letter to Daigo at the end. How earned, how deserved it is. And yet, it's so hollow because it's literally the bare minimum Kiryu needed to do for him. Think about how much more fulfilling this story could have been if we actually spent it with Daigo, resolving all the pain there. Also, Kiryu faking his death??? Abandoning his family, after we just literally in the last game proved why you shouldn't do that??? I get that this was supposed to be the end of the series and nothing is more final than death. But at the first opportunity they drag Kiryu back, like they always do. So his faked death does nothing to the plot except hurt the people around him, the people who cared about him. I in fact wrote an entire fic about how bad a job I think this game was and how much it hurt me personally. So it's very hard for me to be objective about this.

Viewing it apart from continuity, it's a relatively engaging story about a middle-aged dad trying to navigate a shady past. And if you look at this like that, if Kiryu was just some guy, some stranger, I know I wouldn't be as devastated by it as I am. For all the people who love this game, maybe that's what's working for you. It's also lush and beautiful and Kiryu's ass is in every shot. But putting it in context... I can't really think of anything I like here.

Eighth: Yakuza Kiwami 2 -

Now, now, before you get angry, I love Kiwami 2! In terms of enjoyment, I rate it very high! But... it's a pretty hot mess in terms of story. It's a real odd duck in continuity and I know that's down to it was originally a sequel to a standalone game that was never meant to have a sequel. And when they remade Yakuza 1, they couldn't very well not make Yakuza 2. But considering what we later did in the series... it just doesn't quite come together. Like, Ryuji should matter. The shit we bring up about that backstory should matter. This was a great opportunity for Kiryu to unpack some of his feelings about the yakuza and it makes sense that he's depressed as shit here, but... there's just a lot of missed opportunities. In our pursuit of putting Daigo on the throne, there was so much more work we could have done regarding the sins of the father, the narrative is kinda set up for that since we're a father-son team, but... we don't really. We again let Kiryu refuse to unpack and shy out of the emotional weight of our choices. I don't love that. And since we do some of the work, we at least start it, in Yakuza 3 with Kiryu having to acknowledge that he abandoned Daigo in a shit position (god if only, if only...), it's weird that we didn't build more of the blocks here. Again, I know this is largely down to Yakuza 2 was never supposed to exist and they didn't know how many games they would get, but since it's a remake, they had time to go back and clean things up. *sigh* Oh well, at least there's Ryuji titty and tigers to fight.

#This is very biased #Not objective #Yakuza writing