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callioope · 3 years

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Continuing my reactions to Avatar: The Last Airbender.

This post is about Book 2. See my overall impressions and thoughts on Book 1 here.

Quick/General Thoughts

Uhhh pretty wild there is both a solar eclipse and a super comet happening in the same summer… anyways!!!

Ba Sing Se was so messed up omg

Aang

SMH more adults trying to take advantage of Aang. I was furious with the Earth Kingdom general who tried to force Aang to fight the Fire Lord well before he was ready. Clearly he was not ready! And then the audacity for him to attack Aang and then Katara to provoke the Avatar state was whole levels of messed up.

The Great Appa Kidnapping: Yeah, so, as soon as the sand traders took him, I was like, “Oh no. I’ve heard about this. They are going to be in trouble!” But even then I didn’t know it stretched out over so many episodes. These episodes broke my heart! Aang’s complete distress at having lost Appa. Then the episode from Appa’s POV. Poor Appa! He goes through so much. It’s devastating. And then both Appa and Aang both dream of how they originally met each other? UNFAIR. CRUEL. HOW DARE THE CREATORS DO THIS TO ME. (I’m being facetious I love it I live for this kind of drama this is how i express they were doing good storytelling)

The whole “final chakra” being about letting go of attachments… hmm that felt VERY Star Wars of them… Filoni is this your doing? (Although actually I don’t remember seeing his name on any Book 2 episodes.)

Sokka

My fave continues to be the long-suffering Sokka, just trying to get his family to Omashu, it shouldn’t be this hard!!! This was literally what I wrote at the time of watching “Chapter Two: The Cave of Two Lovers,” and OH LITTLE DID I KNOW!!! [cut to Book 3… lmao… anyways]

Sokka making a map to help keep track of the maze-like cave/tunnel is actually really clever. I can’t believe people think he’s stupid. I mean, sure, it didn’t end up working, but that’s because the cave was magic or whatever, and that is beyond his control!

Side note, but lol at Sokka’s purchases and love for shopping. His ridiculous belt! How excited he was that it matched his bag!

Second side note, I was pretty excited to see that gif where Sokka is making that “I’m watching you” gesture and then goes “Water tribe!”

Katara

Yeah, notice how I don’t have much to say about Katara? It’s not that I don’t like her or that I don’t think she’s interesting, but. I just don’t really have a lot to say about her.

I was amused by how she handled those bullies. My impression before I started watching was that she was going to be this like, pure and GoodTM character, but she definitely has her flaws and that is better.

I really liked the scene where she is able to calm Aang down while he’s in the Avatar state. There was good build up to that, showing her worry every time he entered it and her awareness of the fact that he only ever enters it when feeling upset. The fact that she was able to do that clearly Meant Something. So again, I suppose, I really feel up to this point that the show is very much like “Aang/Katara Endgame!” it felt very obvious to me. And I knew before starting the show that Zuko and Katara are a thing — but Aang and Katara is just so heavy handed that it was impossible for me to ship them with anyone else. They were just foundational to the show. Like it always felt like a foregone conclusion to me, almost as if they were established from the beginning although they obviously weren’t.

Toph

I spent like, the second half of Book 1 thinking “WHEN TOPH WHEN TOPH!” Imagine my ire that she still isn’t around for the first five episodes of Book 2, which is titled “EARTH” my goodness.

But OH was I delighted by “Chapter 6: The Blind Bandit”!!! I loved her intro, I loved how Aang is just immediately in awe of her skills when he sees her. He knows she’s exactly the teacher he’s been waiting for. “She waited and listened!” he says. Yes. I love it. (But also, lol at Sokka booing Aang.) Despite this, Aang really does not handle that first interaction very well!

So frustrating how her parents were treating her. “She’s fragile and helpless!” what a thing to say about your daughter. [Also you literally named her “tough”?!] And he is basically going to imprison her, wtf. & how do you get off saying “the avatar is no longer welcome here”?! smh children whose parents try to “control” their kids always end up being the most rebellious.

I was amused that “my dad changed his mind” apparently was a popular lie daughters use on this show. *facepalm*

I liked the contrast between how Toph wanted to teach Aang and how Katara thought he should be taught! That was interesting. And yeah, Toph certainly lives up to her name.

Zuko & Iroh

Spent a good portion of the early part of this season wondering how Zuko and Iroh could possibly be related to the awful Fire Lord (and Azula for that matter — jeez she is nuts!), and longing to know what happened to Zuko’s mom. (Obviously that would be answered soon!)

Knowing that Zuko eventually joins the Aang crew, but also remembering that I never saw Iroh with them, made me SEVERELY worried that something terrible would happen to Iroh. And I spent the entire rest of the series worrying about that. Uh, especially since, apparently Iroh is hopeless at Survival 101. Honestly that was surprising to me.

Zuko deciding they needed to split up was devastating!!! No!!! I loved the adventures of Zuko & Iroh!! He said, “There's no reason for us to stick together,” and I was like, “Yes there is you idiot! Because you’re family and you love each other!!!” I was so sad. I mean, also Iroh is currently the only person who likes Zuko, so, you know, that might be a good reason to stay with him. Just a thought.

The last thing Zuko needs is to be alone, that will NOT be good for his issues. And lo and behold, look! Immediately, he’s struggling on his own. But I did like that episode (“Chapter 7: Zuko Alone”) because we get to see Zuko’s mom! (Uh, did she have a name?) Turtle ducks are so cute.

“Everything I’ve done I’ve done to protect you.” THIS. SLAYED. ME!!!!!! I mean, y’all know Rogue One is my jam so this parallel with Zuko’s mom and Galen Erso????? I lost it. I just lost it. Plus, though it isn’t confirmed until later, we can tell she’s sacrificing herself to save Zuko and just. (A) what a completely messed up family, but (B) MY HEART. SHE BETTER BE ALIVE is all I’m saying.

Interesting side note: they never show Ozai’s face in the early seasons.

If you assumed that I was delighted to see Iroh has been tailing Zuko this whole time, you’d be correct. I had hoped that was the case and was very glad it was. Although *facepalm* again at Zuko. I suppose he had no way of knowing Katara had healing powers but it was so frustrating knowing if he had just listened to them for one minute they could have helped Iroh after Azula blasted him. At least he made him tea and nursed him back to health.

If the evil advisor of Ba Sing Se had files on everyone and knew everything that went on… I mean… did he know about Iroh and Zuko?

I didn’t jot down any notes about this at the time, BUT. Man. Did I ADORE Zuko and Iroh’s adventures in Ba Sing Se. I mean it was a nice relief from all the other crazy stuff happening. (Not happy to see Jet though. Ugh.)

Finally, though, Zuko’s betrayal at the very end of the season totally shocked me. Because of spoilers, I knew he’d join Aang’s crew, and so it was so confusing! And such a regression, I really didn’t understand it and was very worried about what it would mean for his redemption arc — but more on that in the next post, don’t want to get ahead.

Azula

Oh. Boy. Again, I knew she was going to be crazy, but I don’t think I was prepared for just how messed up she is. “Do the tides command this ship. You said they would not allow us…” Jeez that is pedantic in a very bizarre way and obviously not what was meant… Yikes.

Also, Azula is much better at finding Zuko than Zuko is at finding Aang. Just a stray observation.

“Father regrets your banishment. He wants you home.” [insert IT’s A TRAP gif here]

“If the Earth Kingdom finds us, they'll have us killed. If the Fire Nation finds us, they'll turn us over to Azula. Earth kingdom it is.” Yeah, this line was hilarious but also sad. It really said a lot about Azula, and Zuko and Iroh’s relationship with her.

Had no idea Azula had her own crew. It was incredibly clear that Ty Lee felt coerced to join her and didn’t really want to, but that was less clear to me for Mai. Mainly seemed like Mai was bored with where she was and was just like “shrugs might as well do evil stuff.”

I did know that a character named “Mai” would eventually be Zuko’s love interest (and it is pretty heavily portrayed that she has a crush on him), so at this point, I was very much like, “Hmm. This character is too apathetic and annoying, I don’t want her to end up with Zuko!” Plus, the fact that her name was pronounced “May,” (which was not how I thought “Mai” was pronounced) and I knew Zuko would have a thing with a lady in a tea shop, I wasn’t 100% sure Zuko/Mai were end game.

“She’s crazy and she needs to go down.” I think Iroh said this. I just don’t know what to say. Why is Azula the way she is? That’s never entirely clear to me. In some ways, it’s implied she was just Like That (in the flashback where mom is like “What is wrong with you?”) and perhaps she’s just her father’s daughter. I don’t need a reason, per se. Idk. I just don’t know what to say to her. She clearly needs help.

#avatar the last airbender #avatar: the last airbender #atla #a:tla

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lesbiansforboromir · 5 years

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im sorry but im a shameless aragorn/denethor shipper. do you have any thoughts about how shit would have played out if both denethor and boromir had lived in a universe with past denethor/aragorn? would the old flame rekindle despite the animosity that aragorn claiming the throne would cause? would boromir ever find out that his father had a fling with aragorn, and how would he react if he did find out?

Migraines give me the time to finally sit down and reply to all my inbox but they don’t give me the skill so bare with me but FUCK I’m glad to know there are more Denethor/Aragorn shippers. ANyway, getting to it-

I’m iffy on how much of a relationship Denethor and Thorongil had all those years ago. Denethor’s married to Finduilas early on in that whole timeline, there isn’t much space for anything but a VERY hot and heavy and quick affair. But that definitely does suit them I suppose.

I think I might go for a sort of… they’ve been dancing around each other for a few years and perhaps there’s a very sudden and surprising moment where Aragorn kisses Denethor- man perhaps… just before that last siege on Umbar. They’re both miles and miles from home… this whole intense thing between them is much starker after spending all this close knit and dramatic time together, and Thorongil knows he’s going to be leaving after this, essentially abandoning Denethor.

It all gets too heavy, there’s an illicit kiss in the Captain’s quarters of Denethor’s ship, it lasts too long, they both come out of it knowing for a fact that the other feels the same way. Aragorn’s purpose is achieved, Denethor knows he loves him, and Aragorn knows he’s loved in return. But Denethor is married and this is not something he can do- it’s not even something he can explore! Think about! Despite how important Aragorn has become in his life, how oddly vital his company is, how strangely he’s stepped into this role of a confidante that understands him in a very specific way- Finduilas is also all those things, and she deserves so much better from him. They part ways, it’s more of a goodbye than anything that happens later.

Which makes a meeting between them after the siege at Minas Tirith all the more intense. In this kind of timeline it works best if Boromir was just saved at Parth Galen and followed the three hunters (meaning Denethor never even thinks Boromir’s dead), so you can also add in a juicy little nugget of ‘Aragorn actually did get there in time to save Boromir and took a few arrows for him to boot because it’s Denethor’s son of course he will! He has too!’ So now you have a great deal of emotions to get your teeth into.

Denethor’s suspicious of Aragorn first, but that gets conflicted with tales his son tells of Aragorn saving his life later. And then Aragorn goes and saves Faramir too, it makes it difficult. Aragorn hasn’t changed at all, he even looks like Denethor remembers him. Which adds another knot of discolour to this picture, Denethor does not, Denethor looks ragged, rough edged, powerful but battered and old, despite only being 2 years older than Aragorn. I think there’s a little guilt to it for Aragorn, Denethor’s given up so much of himself just in the defense of Gondor, a kind of sacrifice that Aragorn hasn’t known. Aragorn hadn’t overestimated him precisely, but he’d underestimated how much of a toll it would all take. Perhaps… he should have been here, could he have? Could he have helped? Somehow? He’s not used to doubting himself overmuch, but this…

So they start off with confusion that Denethor decides to deal with by not dealing with it. First they have to make plans for the battle at the Black Gate, which Denethor comes to by the way, ‘At the end of the world, I care little for the will of Kings’ he says. Looking Aragorn in the eye. As he shucks his robes of state and reveals the chain mail he still wears every day. And then there’s a beat where they fight and lead and battle together. Again. It’s like he never left, which is infuriating and uplifting and heartbreaking for the both of them. All this lost time. Yet they still know each other this well. Dreadful!

But it all feeds into that slow break down of barriers for them to finally start talking to each other. They have to discuss the whole kingship thing next, which is just so much time spent together and they’re arguing so much, it’s almost WORRYING, they sound like they’d get to fists at any moment but it never gets there. And Imrahil is never worried, ‘no they were always like that, it’s just how they communicate’ and he’s right, there’s more being said in these fights about policy than either of them want to admit.

So… yes I do think eventually there’s some… ‘emoting’, as much as Denethor hates it. There’s some… hurt. There’s some tenderness. There’s a little hurdling over the inherent heteronormativity. There’s even some… ‘you were missed’ (I missed you) OH it’s so slow. OH it takes so long, way into Aragorn’s kingship and their partnership as King and Steward. Long enough for Arwen to go from curious to confused to shocked to confused again to bored to frustrated and then she falls for Denethor as well to boot. But in the end it settles out, and Denethor eventually decides he’s old enough to allow the wound to his pride of being a ‘secret lover’. Though he’d never admit it.

As for Boromir’s reaction. Hm. I think it would be a shock for Denethor to realise how insightful Boromir is about him. He’ll be trying to hide the relationship, it’s his very personal life, no one needs to know and he doesn’t want them too. Not to mention he has no idea how Boromir would react. Despite the somewhat tolerant period they’re experiencing, it’s not easy, even he struggled with it. Even he’d had prejudices to reject.

But Boromir, who developed his ability to read his father as almost a survival mechanism, can tell something has changed in his life and in his relationship with the king and queen. He wouldn’t pry, but it would be on his mind, it would confuse him, and Denethor would be aware of that. And I do think probably… he would come to realise that the extent of Boromir’s loyalty to him and all the things he carried for him, this very strange relationship they fell into where the war effort was their priority to the exclusion of all else- There’s a realisation that they both know each other too much and yet not at all. Boromir knows exactly what Denethor would advise, how to support him, how to win his wars, but they don’t know how to talk about the things that matter to each other. Denethor has no idea about either of his son’s passions, Boromir least of all since Faramir does tend to be loud about what he feels. It’s wrong. And he wants to resolve it.

So I think in the end he does actually just… tell him. Submit to this mortifying ordeal in order to try and signal that he wants things to change between them. He’s aware it’s a risk, but if he wants Boromir to be open about the risky things, then this is what he has to do.

And oh BOY what a doozey of a conversation for the both of them huh? It’s made an addendum to the end of one of their debriefs, a situation they’re both very comfortable in, even if it means Boromir’s standing before Denethor’s desk in his study when he speaks. Denethor just gets it out in his clear and decisive way that doesn’t brook interruption, but Boromir is in no position to do that anyway. And despite Denethor’s apparent confidence, he begins to worry with how long Boromir has to just stand there, hands clasped behind his back, expression neutral as usual, but obviously struggling with something if his prolonged silence and micro expressions are anything to go by.

In the end Denethor has to just ask if Boromir has some issue with this. Which breaks through his knotted thicket at least, and he answers no, honestly, and yet there’s something… else… Denethor can feel behind it all. Boromir’s ability to simply withstand and rebuff Denethor’s prying has only gotten better with age but there’s still something. Boromir seems somewhat lost, things he wants to say but obviously doesn’t know how to say them to his father specifically. He wants to… comfort him, help him somehow, but there’s something else too. Which again clearly pushes home the realisation that they lost touch somewhere, they stopped knowing each other. Boromir is struggling with something and Denethor couldn’t even begin to tell you what it is. Although later, as he’s considering it, some logical answers come to mind, answers that could change a lot of how he views his son, things that are hard to see him as.

Boromir’s going through the same thing but at a different angle. He’s only surprised at Denethor’s reclamation of a romantic life, and that surprise turns to a strange kind of gladness quickly. He never imagined Denethor would ever be able to live this way again and it does change his view of Aragorn rather dramatically, but he can reconcile to all that especially if his father is actually… happy.

What’s more difficult is reconciling the father’s he’s known all these years, who’s said this and decided that, with this man he’s presented with now, in a relationship with a man, a relationship he told him about too. Quite apart from Gondor’s strict cultural disapproval of digging into people’s private romantic life, the concept of telling his father of his own relationships had never even come to mind. Boromir’d assumed he’d be dead before this would ever be in question.

BUT after a long protracted period of time where everything appears the same but there’s some frisson to Boromir and Denethor’s conversations that literally drives Faramir up the goDDAMN wall. He knows it’s there, he can’t explain it, he has no idea what it could be and he HATES it so much.

After that, Boromir does tell his dad. Surprisingly he chooses a not-professional setting, they’re just talking in Boromir’s quarters after a rare family dinner together. But woof it has to be eeked out of him still. He starts them off with just the clear acknowledgement that he’s been strange since Denethor’s revelation. And then tries to word ‘it was a shock to know we had this in common, that you were like me, though perhaps not entirely’ in as infuriatingly neutral a way as possible. But he still doesn’t look at Denethor as he says it. And the silence then isn’t so long, just a pause for a ‘ah, so I was right’ kind of sigh from Denethor. A little longer for him to let the big perspective shift start in his head. He starts running the numbers- how long had Boromir kept this secret, what was his life like because of it, what else did Denethor not know? Denethor’s mind is an analysis machine, he can’t help it.

And when he takes his shoulder and Boromir looks at him in just a little surprise at the affectionate gesture, he notices the slight tug down of Boromir’s ear lobes, where he’d used to wear the stately earrings common among young unattached noble men of wealth, but that Boromir had forsaken. Long ago, Denethor realises, when he thinks back. And he wears the more austere tunics and sashes and regalia that are usually reserved for older men, no, married men. Denethor and Gondor as a whole had assumed the slow change in style had been another mark of Boromir’s dedication to Gondor’s defense above all else, but it happened long after he’d made that commitment. Suddenly it all has a thoroughly different and more poignant meaning. Suddenly Boromir is standing there, a man with a life and a past and a family that Denethor had never even considered before. Suddenly there’s a stranger before him.

And that… is painful… it’s a painful moment, an angry moment too, Sauron’s long dead but Denethor is still finding the corpses of things that creature took from him. But then Boromir returns the touch, his wide hand gripping Denethor’s shoulder in return, quiet but meaningful and holding his gaze with some quiet kind of understanding. Yes, the war took a great deal from all of them, but they have time now, and most importantly, they are both willing to build this relationship back up again.

#denethor #aragorn #boromir #denagorn #arathor #lotr #tolkien #lord of the rings #this........... became something it was NOT meant to be but I'm ffffucking emoji about it anyway!!!#erran vs tolkien #Anonymous #blame it on the migraine #chats

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joeybelle · 4 years

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Starlight - Chapter 26

Cassian Andor x Original female character

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Strong language, Violence

Size: 7300

The war room was incredibly busy and the air was heavy with tension. She wasn’t used to seeing it filled to the brim with people staring at unfamiliar holo-maps and blinking lights on screens, but she knew the concerned looks on their faces really well. The already intimate feeling of dread had accentuated and it seemed that she wasn’t the only one feeling it.

“It’s been brought to our attention that you know Galen Erso personally,” Mon Mothma said, looking just as poised as ever. “Could you tell us more about that?”

Cora had to make an effort to pry her eyes from one of the blinking screens. Her throat felt incredibly dry. “Well, I assume you know the circumstances in which I met him.” Mon Mothma nodded and Cora had to swallow the panic. If Cassian had seen fit to tell them about that, then something really bad must have happened. “Then you probably know everything already.”

She could see Draven fidgeting uncomfortably in the corner of her eye, but he kept silent. She wondered if Cassian had been able to somehow stop him from intervening; or was it all Mothma? Speaking of Cassian, where was he?

“What do you know about what he was working on? What do you remember?”

Cora frowned, making an effort to remember. “Some sort of new fighter ships, but I don’t know much about them.” It felt odd going back to being interrogated, although she could feel the atmosphere was nowhere as hostile as it used to be. “As you might have guessed, they didn’t really talk openly about this in front of a kid.”

“But you’ve looked at the files,” Draven chimed in, apparently unable to keep his mouth shut. “You must have seen something.”

She returned his glare. “The details of whatever the Empire was doing weren’t really my priority back then. You keep forgetting I’m a doctor, not a spy.” He shut his mouth and crossed his arms over his chest, his face going back to looking moderately annoyed.

“Do you think this was the only project he was working on at that time?” Mothma asked, a lot calmer than Draven had been.

The frown on Cora’s face deepened, but it was of little use. “No… I don’t think it was the only thing he was working on.” She closed her eyes, trying hard to remember the things that had happened such a long time ago. She’d never thought that they would ever become relevant. “I remember pretty well when they first came to Corinthia, because it was so unexpected to have another family living with us. It was a big deal for us too, because Krennic was going to coordinate this thing. He called this project my mother was part of his ‘pet project’ and that he was working with Galen Erso on something else. Something about Erso doing this as a personal favour… or something.” It wasn’t very convincing, but her brain was just patching together broken memory fragments. “He was regarded as a very good engineer as far as I know. I guess they could have had him working on more than one project at a time.”

“Did anyone ever talk about what this other project was in your presence, or might you have overheard something?”

“Not that I can recall.”

“Would you tell us, even if you did?” Draven mumbled and Cora could swear she saw him roll his eyes.

“If you ask nicely,” she spat back, but a raised hand from Mon Mothma silenced them both.

“You mentioned they lived on Corinthia?” She took back the reins of the questioning and steered it into less hostile territory. “For how long?”

“Six months to a year? I don’t really remember.”

“That’s a huge margin,” Draven concluded.

“I was a kid.”

Mothma ignored the interruption and continued as if nothing had happened. “So you knew them well.”

“His wife more than him. She was really motherly. I remember liking her a lot.” However, she couldn’t remember her name.

“And you knew his daughter too. Jyn Erso.” Cora nodded. “Were you two close?”

“As close as the only two kids on a warship can get.” Cora shrugged. “Yes, I guess you can say we were pretty close.”

“Did you ever wonder what happened to her or try to reconnect after your mother’s death?”

“No. I didn’t really have time to care about others that much.” She was pretty sure it sounded a lot more janded than she intended.

“Do you know Saw Gerrera?” Draven asked, looking a little impatient.

“No, who is he?”

“He used to be part of the Alliance,” Mothma explained, and for the first time Cora noticed a shadow pass over her features. “However, his views are a lot more extreme than ours, so he decided a long time ago to follow a different path. He’s caused us a lot of trouble over the years.”

“I’m sorry, I don’t know him.”

Draven snorted. “Didn’t they bother to at least teach you the names of those you were meant to kill?”

The level of annoyance was rising, but the anti-hangover medication seemed to have the secondary effect of mellowing her out, so what came out of her mouth sounded surprisingly detached. “I seem to keep having to repeat myself, General: even when I worked for the Empire, I was still a doctor. We’re not the ones doing the killing.” She turned her head to look at Mothma. “How is any of this relevant and what’s it got to do with me?”

“We know that Galen Erso left the Empire at some point and went into hiding. Sometimes after your mother’s accident, we assume. He did it with the help of Saw Gerrera,” Mothma explained. “After his wife was killed, he was forced…”

“We don’t know that,” Draven interrupted.

“He returned to his former duties within the Empire.” Mothma shot him an icy glare. “His daughter wasn’t captured, but was rescued and raised by Saw Gerrera. He trained her like one of his fighters. She fell off the radar for a while, but we managed to track her down.”

Cora nodded. She had to admit that she hadn’t thought about Jyn in years, and even when she did it was just a passing thought. She hoped she was happy though. From what she remembered, Jyn was a small and soft child, always afraid of Cora’s shortcuts though the darkness of the ventilation system. She would have never guessed that she could ever be trained to become a fighter, but time and circumstances change people. She was a prime example.

“Do you think it’s possible that she’d remember you?”

Cora had to once again pry her eyes from one of the blinking screens at the edge of her field of vision. “Perhaps? She was quite young and I don’t think I’ve made such a big impression, but she might remember me.”

Mothma nodded, but her expression was unreadable, besides her usual motherly vibe. “Would you be willing to talk to her?”

“Are you trying to recruit her?”

“It’s a little more complicated than that.” Cora waited for her to elaborate, but it seemed no further explanation was coming.

“And classified?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. She was really tired of being treated differently from everybody else. Although she was now one of them, she could still feel a cloud of suspicion looming over her head.

“Well, no…”

“Yes!” Draven interjected, taking a step forward. “All you have to do is talk to her, and get her to be a little more… cooperative.”

“I would really love to know what I’m getting myself into, General,” Cora said through gritted teeth. “With all due respect.”

“There’s been talk of a pilot,” Mon Mothma said, ignoring Draven’s protests. “An imperial cargo pilot has defected. He’s supposed to be carrying some news from Galen Erso for Saw Gerrera, regarding one of the projects he’s been working on. We’ve tried intercepting him, but he seems to have reached Gerrera already.”

“I see.” And there it was again, the sinking feeling that something really bad was going to happen really soon. Now Cora was convinced it wasn’t just an empty feeling. Once again, she was afraid. “So that’s where you’ve sent Cassian to,” she said out loud, before she realized that she had no good excuse for knowing that Cassian had already been shipped. Luckily, she was probably too livid to be able to blush in embarrassment.

“Yes,” Mothma replied, appearing to completely ignore Cora’s confession. “And as you might have guessed,” she sighed, “Saw Gerrera isn’t very keen on talking to us anymore, but we would like to know what sort of information the Pilot might be carrying.”

“So you need Jyn to talk to Saw Gerrera for you.”

“Correct.”

“And you need me to talk to her because… she might not be so keen on talking to you either?”

Mon Mothma nodded. “We think seeing a familiar face might make her a bit more willing to cooperate. Being surrounded by strangers might be a little intimidating. We wouldn’t want her to think we’re hostile towards her in any way.”

They hadn't been so thoughtful with her. Cora grimaced and wondered if Mon Mothma didn’t sense the irony in her own words or if she just ignored it. However, by the not so subtle roll of eyes from General Draven, Cora assumed that they were instead intended for the General’s ears. A warning, perhaps.

“Alright,” Cora agreed. “I’ll talk to her, but don’t expect much. I’m not sure she remembers me, or if my presence here can change anything really.” But she wanted to be there anyway, just in case Draven decided to bark at her like a rabid dog. She still remembered with dread how they treated her when she was first brought before them.

“Thank you,” Mothma said, with a slight tilt of her head. “We appreciate your help.”

“Yeah,” Cora mumbled. “Glad to be of use. Let me know when you need me. Anything else?”

“No, thank you. You may get back.” The smile on her face was probably the friendliest Cora had ever gotten from the poised senator and that gave her a little hope that at least she didn’t consider her a traitor anymore. She smiled and got up to leave.

“So you said found Jyn? How’s she doing?” Cora asked before exiting the room.

“We found her in an imperial labour camp,” Mothma said, following her to the door. “Not doing great I suppose.”

“Neither are we.”

“How so?”

“I don’t really know,” Cora said, embarrassed. She hadn't meant to say that out loud. “I just got this feeling that something bad’s about to happen.”

“You might be right,” she said, her face suddenly turning somber. She followed her outside of the war room, letting the blast doors close behind them. “There’s been this rumour that the project Galen Erso was working on is in fact a weapon,” she said, keeping her voice down so the passersby couldn’t hear. “A planet killer, someone called it.”

Cora froze in place, her eyes widening slightly as she turned her head to look at the Senator. The woman’s expression was just as unreadable as ever, but it had lost its usual warmth.

“Do we stand a chance against it? If the rumour’s real, I mean.”

“Of course,” she replied, and her face broke into a reserved smile. “We have to.”

Cora nodded, but she was sure her face reflected every bit of her inner turmoil. She really hoped that whomever spread that rumour had been wrong, otherwise she wasn’t sure what a handful of rebels could do against it. “I’ll be around, if you need me,” she let the Senator know, excusing herself. She needed a stiff drink.

“We’ll call for you. But until we know anything for sure,” Mon Mothma added before returning to the War Room, “there’s no need to cause any unnecessary panic.”

“Yeah, of course.”

Cora wasn’t sure how she managed to reach the med bay downstairs, for the world was a bit of a blur. It didn’t help that the shock had undone whatever effect the hangover medication had on her, and now her stomach was protesting loudly, threatening to expel its contents right then and there. She had to take a moment to regain her composure before she could move on to look for her friend.

“Are you feeling okay?” Lewella asked, concern pretty visible on her face, once she saw Cora’s livid face.

“More or less,” Cora replied taking a seat next to her friend on a supply crate.

“Eat something,” she said, pushing her plate of food towards Cora, but even the smell made her nauseous.

“No thanks,” she replied, grimacing and pushing it back.

“Rude,” Lew mumbled. “Are you really alright? You look awful.”

“Hangover,” Cora said in a really detached voice that didn’t really sound like her own.

“That bad?”

“Something bad’s about to happen,” Cora said, before she could stop herself. She knew she shouldn’t worry her friend, but there was no one else she could talk to and it was killing her. “Something really big’s coming.”

“That’s just hangover induced paranoia,” she said with a raised eyebrow. “Did you drink something weird? I swear, if Melshi’s brought anything weird from his missions again, I’ll ice him.”

“No, I’ve been feeling it for a while. It’s like… It’s like it’s always there in the back of my mind lately.”

“We’re all feeling things like that sometimes, you just learn to ignore it after a while,” she said, poking at her food, but Cora could see she wasn’t eating anymore.

Cora kept her mouth shut. It wasn’t something she could rationally explain, not without telling her what Mon Mothma had asked her not to. So she just stared into the distance, watching the ships come and go.

“Besides,” Lewella added, dropping her food to the side and inching closer to Cora so she could comfortably place an arm around her shoulders, “if anything is coming, we’ll be here to face it. All of us, together.”

Cora smiled and leaned into her friend’s touch, finding a bit of comfort in her presence. “Do you need help with anything? I’d like to keep busy for a while, keep my mind off things.”

“I could find something for you to do.” Lew yawned and hopped off the crate. “But I’m not letting you overwork yourself. By the way, weren’t you supposed to be working today?”

“Took a couple of days off,” Cora mumbled, remembering once again the reason why she did so.

“And you drank without me?” she said, looking completely bewildered, so much that Cora burst into laughter.

“It wasn’t a happy occasion,” Cora tried excusing herself.

“I don’t care, you know I can drink for every occasion! Have I told you about that time…”

Cora laughed, only half-listening to what her friend was saying, and ushered her towards the door, leaving the busy hangar behind.

It wasn’t until the next day that she heard anything from the War Room. The wait had been excruciating, her mind full with the wildest scenarios, weapons and armies and imperial warships. She tried to imagine what something called a planet killer would look like, but she failed. Her mental state hadn’t been in the best of shapes, so the new information had sent it into overdrive. But deep down, she knew she was afraid. Most of all, she was scared for Cassian.

She was always a bit wary when he was away, wondering where he’d ended up this time, what he was doing, in what sort of danger they were putting him. But right now she desperately wanted him back, safe. Because right now the stakes were insanely high.

She couldn’t understand, if the rumours of a weapon that could destroy planets were real, how they’d even stand a chance. How do you fight a weapon that has the power to wipe you, and your army, and the whole planet along with your base? As far as Cora was aware, and she was sure she wasn’t wildly off the mark, the Rebellion had nothing that could compare to that. It was still a small resistance against the might of the Empire. They had no chance, and yet she knew they would not give up easily.

She wished she could still be a coward, but unfortunately that time had gone. Her love for Cassian hadn’t managed to make her fearless, but had made her willing to confront her fears. She knew she couldn’t throw everything away, she couldn’t just jump on a ship and run anymore. She was here, where she belonged, and would be here until the end, whenever and wherever that might be. She only wished Cassian would be by her side too.

She was working when they called her to the War Room. There was an odd tension surrounding her, like the whole world was buzzing, but it could very well be that it was she who was the tense one.

“You’re currently calling yourself Liana Hallik. Is that correct?” she heard Draven say once she passed the blast doors, arriving in the middle of the interrogation. They hadn't had the courtesy of inviting her from the start, but it was better than never, she assumed.

A wave of conflicting emotions washed over her. Her mother’s name had been Liana. It was still painful to hear it spoken by someone else, but that also meant that maybe Jyn remembered the time spent on ISD Corinthia.

She moved closer, hoping to get a glimpse of the girl she hadn’t seen since they both only reached a stormtrooper’s knee, but instead her heart nearly jumped out of her chest when she saw Cassian leaning next to a screen. He was looking at her with the corner of his eye, and a discreet nod of his head took the place of hello. Cora smiled, despite the nervousness and focused her attention on the woman being interrogated.

She was about Cora’s age, which was consistent with what she knew about her. She bore very little resemblance to the little girl Cora remembered from her youth, but that was also to be expected. People change a lot in...sixteen? Seventeen years? That’s almost an entire lifetime.

Jyn looked exhausted and more than a little apprehensive, but Cora’d been in her position before and she knew how uncomfortable it could be to have all those eyes fixed on you. Especially Draven’s pronounced frown. And if she were to he honest, Cassian wasn’t really helping either. Over time she’d forgotten just how intimidating he could be to someone who didn’t know him. They were all ganging up on the poor girl.

Cora wished she could chime in, try to shield her a little from the assault, but she knew it wasn’t her place to speak yet. She trusted Mothma’s judgement, and if the threat was as big as they thought, they didn’t really have much time for pleasantries.

“We’re up against the clock here, girl,” Draven barked, looking annoyed. “So if there’s nothing to talk about, we’ll just put you back where we found you.”

“I was a child,” she defended herself, and Cora felt really bad for her. “Saw Gerrera saved my life. He raised me. But I’ve no idea where he is. I haven’t seen him in years.”

“We know how to find him, that’s not our problem. What we need is someone who gets us through the door without being killed,” Cassian said, and it was almost a flashback to her own interrogations. He really needed to learn how to be nicer.

They all explained to her what they’d told Cora the day before: there was an imperial defector—currently being held up by Saw Gerrera— that was claiming the Emperor was building a super weapon with the power to destroy planets, that her father was in fact one of the lead engineers and he’d been the one who sent the pilot. They promised her freedom and a clean record in exchange for her help. It seemed they’d become more lenient over time. Cora was only a little bitter about it.

There was more talk about the hows and whens and wheres, but to Cora those meant nothing. The details didn’t interest her because she wasn’t going to be included in the mission anyway. She just wished Cassian wouldn’t be involved either, especially with the looming feeling of doom still very much present. She watched him from the corner of her eye: he looked tired and worried.

Gone was the glow he had the day before. He once again looked older than his age, the lines on his face deeper than before and the dark circles pretty noticeable. He usually looked like that after long, tiring missions, but all this change in just a couple of days. She had to wonder what had happened.

Cora wished she could step closer, put her hands around his chest and hold him tight, tell him that whatever weight he was carrying on his shoulders she was willing to share with him.

“This here is Doctor Corinthia Enoch,” said Mon Mothma, pulling Cora back from her thoughts and reminding her that she wasn’t there just to spectate. “You might remember her from your childhood. She’s one of our doctors.”

Jyn’s eyes narrowed as Cora took a step forward, trying to look as harmless as possible although she knew the medical uniform could be just as intimidating as the military ones. But the girl smiled, even if it was half a smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

“You’re the girl in the vents,” she said, and Cora couldn’t help but burst into laughter.

“I’ve been called worse,” she laughed, which somehow eased the tension a little. Cora took a seat so she wasn’t towering over her. Draven had turned around and focused his attention on something else, so the atmosphere was a lot friendlier all of a sudden. As friendly as it could get in something called the War Room. Cassian was still frowning in his corner, but Cora knew that was just his work face.

There was an awkward silence between them, while Jyn carefully studied her. She seemed to consider whether to trust her or not, or maybe she was just trying to remember things about their shared childhood. Cora waited patiently for her to speak. She wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do anyway, as far as she was aware, Jyn had already agreed to work with them, so she was there only as a sort of moral comfort.

“Never thought you’d end up being a doctor,” Jyn said after a while. “I thought you were pretty set on becoming a pilot.”

Cora smiled a sad smile. “Yeah, well, life happened,” she replied. “Not everything turns up as planned.”

“And a Rebel?”

“That’s… a more recent development to be honest,” she smiled, a bit embarrassed. “But one I don’t regret in the least.”

“Really?” She looked at her with questioning eyes, and Cora didn’t know if there was distrust in them or not. “What made you change sides?”

That was an easy question with a very complicated answer. Cora took a deep breath, taking her time to find something to say. She could see Draven watching her from the corner of his eye, his back still turned to Jyn, but his whole stance told her he was listening. She wondered if she was there to help win Jyn’s trust, or prove her own loyalty. After such a long time, his distrust was insulting.

“I realized I was believing a lie. I had my eyes shut for a very long time only choosing to see what didn’t oppose any of my convictions.” She took a deep breath. “But once I started looking around and started seeing more than two meters in front of me, I couldn’t just pretend everything was alright.” It was all very vague, but being more specific would have taken a very long time and she assumed no one had time for that. “It still took a long time for me actually leave. Being kidnapped by a certain Intelligence Officer helped a lot in making that decision,” she concluded, pointing a finger in his direction. Cassian snorted, but he did a very good job keeping a straight face.

Jyn smiled the same half smile, but she seemed a little more relaxed this time. “Sounds like quite the story.”

“Yeah. Remind me to tell it to you one day,” she said with a smile. “When we’ll have more time and some… uuuh… better company. Hopefully alcohol too.”

Without Draven listening in and with Mon Mothma seeming to have disappeared, the atmosphere was a lot friendlier. If only Cassian would have sat down beside them so it would just be a talk among friends, instead of a negotiation. But he was talking to Draven in a corner, not paying attention to them anymore.

“Welcome to the Rebellion,” Cora said, smiling at the girl. Jyn blinked a few times in surprise, before mumbling a ‘thank you’. “Don’t worry too much about Draven and the rest. They put up a tough front, but they’re not bad people.” Cora hoped she was right. Unfortunately, Cassian and her few friends were the only ones she could genuinely say that about. Draven was still a mystery. “Anyway, if you ever need me, your best bet is the med bay.”

Jyn looked at her and nodded. She looked tired, but what else was to be expected from someone who had just been rescued from a labour camp. Cora wondered if she could end this meeting and save Jyn from it, since it seemed like nothing else was currently being discussed. She was still a doctor and she could always invoke the patient’s well-being, but she didn’t know if in this case they would listen to her.

Before she could open her mouth to say something, Cassian took a few steps towards the table. “We have to go,” he said, looking at the girl.

Cora’s heart sunk. “Already?” She was unable to hide the disappointment in her voice.

“Soon,” he replied, and Cora could tell he was looking away. “We still have some preparations to make, but we’ll be leaving soon. Thank you, Doctor, we’ll call you if we need further assistance.”

His eyes were cold when he looked at her and Cora wished there was no one around them so she could hug him until some life seeped back into them. She had hoped she could catch him alone for at least a couple of minutes before being shipped again, but that might not be happening.

She nodded and got up. “It’s been my pleasure. Captain Andor, Jyn,” she saluted, before excusing herself and leaving the room.

The feeling of doom followed her on the busy corridors until she entered the med bay. Doctor Crane was sitting at the desk, diligently taking her place since she was away.

“You don’t look too good,” he said, not lifting his eyes from the data-pad in front of him.

“I don’t feel too good,” she admitted, taking a few steps towards the window. It seemed like there was a different kind of rush that day.

“We’ll get over this too,” he said, after a couple of minutes of silence.

“You think?” Cora asked, not bothering to turn around. “A planet killer?”

“I trust the Rebellion and I trust you all. One way or another, we will win. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but one day, there will be light again.”

“I hope you’re right.”

She didn’t feel hopeful, if she were to be honest, but she trusted Cassian. She trusted him with every cell in her being. And if there was anyone to have a chance, it was him.

She tried piecing together the information she had gotten from Jyn’s interrogation. So there was a super weapon that Galen Erso had built, but he had also built a flaw in its design, so it could be taken down at the right time. And now he had sent someone to bring this information to the Rebel Alliance.

Cora couldn’t wrap her mind around how much this man was risking sending word from the middle of the Empire directly to the Rebellion. He must really have balls of steel not only to secretly work for years to sabotage an Imperial super weapon, but to risk everything by sending a cargo pilot to hand them the information. Cora was starting to get nauseous just thinking about it. Compared to these people, she’d never be more than a coward.

“Doctor Enoch,” she heard Mon Mothma’s voice coming from the other side of the room and turned to look at her. “Can I please have a word with you?”

Cora nodded and followed her out of the med bay. There was a sense of weariness as she walked behind Mothma. She wasn't used to get this much attention from the members of the council, all in the same day. She didn't like that she wasn't in the med bay anymore, the place where she felt most in control. But she followed her anyway.

“I know this comes very late, and I have to say I personally am very ashamed of this,” Mon Mothma said once they were safely away from everyone else, in the privacy of one of the personal offices—one that Cora assumed existed, but had never previously entered. There was another officer there holding the duffle bag she had taken with her when she had left her job on the star destroyer and ran away with Cassian. That was unexpected. “We’ve decided a while ago that we would be giving back the things that we took from you, but because of my personal negligence and the things that have happened lately, it seems to have slipped the minds of those responsible with giving it back.” She smiled, but there was no note of embarrassment on her face. “You will see that everything you had in it is still there, we made sure that everything was kept under strict supervision.”

The officer handed her the bag and Cora looked inside. As far as she could tell, everything was still there, including the healing field generator. Especially the healing field generator. She always assumed that they had taken it and given it to one of the field medics, but it seemed that somehow they respected her ownership over the stolen device.

“Lieutenant Marek has a list of everything that was inside at the time of your… imprisonment. You can both go over it, make sure that everything’s alright.”

“There’s no need, I’ll take your word for it,” Cora said, flinging the bag over her shoulder. “Why now?” she asked before leaving the room. “Why give it back now?”

“As I’ve said, we were planning to do it a while ago, but…”

“Yes, but why remember it today?” Cora interrupted her, knowing full well that she was being rude. “Ma’am,” she added, for good measure. “Why today? Have you all decided that you trust me enough not to try and run away or have you given up hope that the Rebellion will survive?”

“Neither,” she said, and seemed not to notice the snark in Cora’s voice. Or she had been expecting it. “You are free to leave whenever you want.”

Cora’s eyes widened and she burst into an incredulous laughter. “And my tracker bracelet?”

“It will be taken down whenever you wish. You have my word.” Cora still looked at her with wide eyes, not being able to fully comprehend the sudden turn of events. “If you wish to leave, we’ll ensure transport for you to a safe place in the galaxy. Also, we won’t forget the help you provided us with until now, so if you ever need us, we’ll be here for you.” The woman was smiling and sounded really genuine, dispelling any suspicion Cora might have had that this was some sort of test to prove her loyalty once again.

“I’m not leaving,” Cora said with determination in her voice. “I’ll be… in the med bay if you need me,” she said.

The amount of things that had happened in only one day was overwhelming. Cora was used to working and staying alert for 12 hours straight, but even on one of the busiest days at work she didn’t feel like there was this much information to process. First, there was the threat of being wiped by an imperial superweapon; then the knowledge that Cassian was being sent to fuck knows where to find a pilot who might have information on how to destroy said planet killer; and now, all of a sudden, she was no longer a prisoner and all her stuff had been returned to her… She was overwhelmed.

“Anything I can help you with?” Dr Crane asked, looking at her with a worried expression on his face as she dropped the duffle bag on one of the tables.

“Ummm…” she looked around her, completely lost. She had no idea what to do next, so she focused on the only thing that was clear in her mind: seeing Cassian before he left.

Once she’d decided this, it was like her mind was in working order once again. All the other things she needed to process were put on a mental shelf and left to be dealt with another time, right now Cassian was the only thing that mattered. She started unloading things from her duffle bag and checking them. Most of the medication and survival gear she had stolen from the Empire seemed to be in working order.

“Doc, can I borrow some supplies?” she asked, already opening one of the medicine cabinets and pulling some stuff out.

“Be my guest,” he said, smiling at the frenzy with which she was shoving things in her bag.

She knew Cassian would do some stupid shit, she was convinced of that. And even if he wouldn’t, someone else would, and he’d still end up injured. She knew, she’d treated him so many times before. And she couldn’t be there with him to save him, if anything happened. So preparing a bag full of survival gear was the best she could do. The portable healing field generator could end up being a lifesaver and she was more than happy to give it to him.

She was putting the supplies in order, deciding what to leave in the bag and what was just her own personal stuff when her hand touched the blaster. She’d forgotten about it, and she was still surprised they’d given it back to her. She pulled it out and checked it. It was still working and it seemed like someone even changed the energy cell before giving it back, making sure that it was fully loaded. Cora lifted her eyes to look at Doctor Crane, but he wasn’t paying attention to her anymore. She hid the weapon under her medical tunic.

“Doc, is it okay if I take half an hour off?” she asked, flinging the bag over her shoulder.

“Of course,” he said, still busy with reading something. “Grab something to eat on the way back too.” Cora nodded and made a mental note to stop by the mess hall, even though she wasn’t hungry in the least. “And wish him good luck.”

She smiled before bolting out the door and running towards the elevators. Hopefully she’d still be able to catch him.

The distress could be sensed everywhere, in the rushed way people walked down the corridor, in the weary way they looked at each other. Cora wondered just how much they knew. She doubted the rumour could be kept a secret for long and from the way they talked to Jyn Erso in a room full of people, they didn’t even try that hard.

She found Jyn next to the ER, heading towards Cassian’s ship. She seemed ready to go wherever the Rebellion was sending them, her face a mask of determination.

“Leaving already?” Cora asked, trying to match her pace. “They didn’t give you much time to rest, did they?”

Jyn nodded. “We are up against the clock, it seems,” she said, mirroring Draven’s snark and Cora couldn't help but smile.

“Do you know where you’re going?” Cora asked, showing just how much she didn’t listen to what had been said in the war room.

“Jedha. After that, I have no idea.” She shrugged. “To find my father, hopefully.”

Cora had heard about Jedha, but mostly since she’d joined the Rebellion. She knew it had become a dangerous place since the Empire’s occupation, with frequent fights between the locals and the occupying forces. Jyn had to be careful—well, all of them, but she trusted Cassian and K2. Jyn didn’t seem as seasoned, but maybe she was projecting her own insecurities on her. Her image of Jyn was still that of a frail, easily scared child.

“I hope you find him,” Cora said, and she was happy that Jyn returned her smile even if it was short lived. “And when you do, I hope you’ll both visit so we can all have a drink and laugh about our childhood.”

“I still can’t picture you as a rebel,” she said, and her voice sounded a bit sarcastic, but Cora brushed it off. “You were quite the Empire supporter back in the day.”

“Also young and naive,” she laughed, a little embarrassed.

Cora stopped and looked around, at the place that had become her home over time. She wasn’t sure when that had happened, when she’d started calling it home and when she felt like she truly belonged, despite Draven’s insistence to make her feel unwelcome. She didn’t even hate him anymore. She’d gotten used to him and his attitude and he didn’t intimidate her anymore, he was just an annoyance. But she was glad she had gotten the chance to stay and become part of the Rebellion.

“Anyway,” she continued, forcing herself to not get too lost in her own thoughts, “do you have any idea what you’ll be facing when you get there?”

“I guess we’ll have to see.”

Cora wondered if Jyn was really as tough as she tried to look. Probably not, and certainly not without a weapon. Cora had noticed that she hadn’t been given one, and since she had been picked up from a labour camp, she doubted that she had her own. Maybe Cassian would give her one once they’d take off. Somehow she doubted it, she knew he wasn’t the most trusting. But they couldn’t send her in the middle of the battle completely unarmed. Cora could feel her own blaster hard against her body.

“Here, take this,” she said taking it out and handing it to her. Jyn looked from the weapon to Cora and frowned. “I’ll want it back, but you can have it for now.”

“Thanks,” she said, still a little cautious, but taking the weapon nonetheless. It looked a lot more natural in her hand, Cora thought.

K2’s tall, dark outline caught her eye, reminding her why she was there in the first place. “Shall we?” Cora said, pointing towards the U-wing.

It didn’t take long to spot Cassian in the crowd, a little further away, talking to Draven. From the sour look on his face she was sure he didn’t like whatever the general had to say. No wonder Cassian looked so tired all the time. She sighed and waited for him.

“Captain,” she greeted once he had gotten closer.

“Doctor,” he replied, and the frown on his forehead relaxed considerably. “How are you?” he said in a low voice, as if anyone would be listening in.

“Oh, you know, the usual. This whole thing with the pilot seems to have stirred things up a little.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, looking down. “I wish I didn’t have to tell them anything about…”

“No, it’s alright,” she said, her heart filled with joy knowing that he really meant to keep his promise to her. “Glad to have been of some help. Though I’m not sure I’ve helped much. Anyway,” she said, trying to keep things short as she could see Jyn and K2 already seeming to be butting heads. “Got my stuff back today.” She took the duffle bag off her shoulder and showed it to him.

“They should have done that a long time ago.” The frown was back and although Cora appreciated his indignation, this wasn’t the time.

“Better late than never.” She opened it a little to show him what was inside. “There’s a healing field generator and some stuff that might save your life, so I'm giving it to you. Wait, where are you running off to?” Cassian had started walking briskly towards the U-Wing and Cora strode after him, fully determined to slap him over that stubborn head of his head once he caught up to him.

“Keep them. We’ll be fine.”

“Cassian! I know you and I know the state you come back to me in and I won’t have it! Take the bag.”

“Stop worrying for a second, will you?” he mumbled, still a few steps in front of her.

“Cassian!” she whisper-shouted after him, but the stubborn ass was still walking. “They said they’ll take the tracker bracelet off if I want to.”

Cassian stopped and turned around to look at her. His eyes darted from her face to her hand and Cora couldn’t understand why, for the briefest moment, he seemed scared.

“They said that I’m free to go anytime I want. They’ll take it off and I’ll be free to go.”

“Why didn’t you take it off?”

“I don’t know. Figured it might help me come back home if I ever get lost.”

“So you’re...”

“I’m not leaving. I’ll be here when you come back.”

Cassian nodded, but didn’t say anything, instead he turned around and walked into the ship.

“Cassian, the bag!” she yelled after him, still holding it in her hand. She heard him yell after the others to hurry and Jyn walked into the ship, leaving only Cora and K2 at the bottom of the ramp.

“Why does she get a blaster and I don’t?” K asked, in a tone that probably meant he was pretty offended.

“I don’t know, but I think you and I both should complain to Draven.”

“Maybe.”

“K!” Cassian shouted from the inside of the ship, sounding more and more impatient.

“Take this,” she said, handing the bag to the droid. “Please take good care of it and make sure it doesn’t get lost. I packed some things that might save your lives in case of an emergency. Please look after it.”

The droid looked at it. “Even mine?”

Cora’s words died in her throat, and for a couple of seconds she could do nothing but stare at the black, expressionless face. “I’m sorry,” she mumbled, and she could feel her heart aching.

“Don’t worry about it. Cassian will take care of me.” He walked up the ramp, towards and increasingly impatient Cassian, holding the bag in his hand. “I’ll look after it, Doctor Enoch.”

“Good luck!” she yelled after them, as the door closed behind him.

Cora stood in the same spot until Lewella came by her side, staring at the patch of sky where she saw Cassian’s ship disappear. She felt lost, like the whole world had shifted under her feet and she couldn’t regain her balance.

“Are you alright?” her friend asked, rubbing soothing circles over her back, as if she was trying to pull her out of her numb state. Cora nodded, afraid that if she’d open her mouth, she’d start bawling. “Let’s go get something to eat,” she said, guiding her back into the building.

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#cassian andor #cassian andor x reader #cassian andor x oc #star wars #rogue one

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deliciousstreetkidcroissant · 6 years

Text

The Cure (Chapter 6)

Author Notes: I got the inspiration for this story from a song by Lady Gaga called “The Cure” and from my personal experience from dealing with anxiety. Also, this is my first time writing smut so it may suck so... yeah... I hope you enjoy

Word Count: 2,800 +

Warnings: Angst, Smut (NSFW) and Curse words

Chapters: (1)(2)(3)(4)(5)

“I'll undress you, 'cause you're tired

Cover you as you desire

When you fall asleep inside my arms

May not have the fancy things

But I'll give you everything

You could ever want, it's in my arms”

“California? What are you doing in Cali?

I smiled to myself hearing Jade turn into our mom with her asking a million and one questions. Her phone call woke me up and made me comprehend how late it was. Chadwick took off early to go to a meeting but promised lunch when he came back dropping a kiss on my forehead before he left.

“Visiting”, I snickered answering her purposely with a short response as I sat up in the bed. I hissed a little not grasping how sore my body was from the slight movement I made.

“What’s wrong?” Jade asked sounding concerned.

“I’m okay, so how are you doing today, sis?” I asked deciding to change the topic.

“Nope, you don’t get to do that... you can’t drop on me you are in Cali and try to switch it up. Now you can either tell me or I can fly out there and discover the reason myself.”

I groan and answer “I’m out here with Chadwick,"

“Chadwick?”

“He flew me out here to visit him,”

Confused, Jade pried, “But I thought you all were not together? You told me...”,

“I know but we are working it out and examining how things will progress,”

“Oh... well did Y’all talk? You need to catch me up with everything. I’m presuming everything went okay since you don’t sound stressed and all. What did you guys do yesterday? Did he take you around the city? Did you go to Disneyland? Does he have any sexy, single friends? I can still travel out there on that answer alone.”

I busted out laughing instructing her not to bring her ratchet behavior to LA.

“Girl, they need this Texas Bama there, okay... anyway, for real, what have you two been getting into in LA?”

I hesitated at first by telling her but thought of an idea to explain to her so she would get the notion without me saying it.

“You remember the lesson you offered me when you advised me what to do if the opportunity presented itself?”

**********

(1 day earlier)

“How I fucked up?” Stunned by his tone and change of attitude.

“Yes, how you fucked this up... if I can refresh your memory, I was the one begging for this relationship to last, I was the one telling you to fight for this, I was the one telling you I loved you... "

“I told you I loved you,” I cut in raising my voice.

“Damn it, Galen, really... I haven’t heard from you for almost a month... no contact and you think you can just call and say “I Love You” and it will fix everything. You cut me out of your life... how do you think made me feel?"

He paused for a second to catch his breath and I could see he was becoming more pissed the further he confessed. He searched everywhere but in my direction to settle himself down.

“Okay Chadwick, I get it... I treated you like shit when you took off and I fucked up but everything I confided to you on the phone was the truth. It’s hard for me to be open but I am working on it. You expect me to just dump all of my feelings onto you but that is not how I am.”

He glares back at me with annoyance and I instantly regret saying my last remark. He chuckles and responds, “But you love me, huh? Riddle me this, how can you love someone you can’t be open with? That makes none fucking sense, Galen.”

“I know... it’s insane, right?” I ask sarcastically. “And hold up, you were the one that dropped that news on me at the last minute. You thought you could tell me the day before you left, that you were leaving and I was expected to be like, “Okay, love, I will be here waiting for you”... Fuck that shit, nigga, that was a bitch move," I yelled now becoming heated.

He remained there staring at me as it disturbed him that came out of my mouth. It shocked me it came out as well but if he demands me to be open, then I am about to get very open.

His nose flares and counters, “Oh, is that the process to get you to talk and express how you feel? Piss you off and then magically, you open up? Mmmh, to think I was doing it wrong all this time...,”

Chadwick gets up from his stool and walks over to my side on the counter but stops a few steps in front of me. “I’m not claiming what I did was right, but you were acting like it was over as soon as I told you. And like I mentioned before, you knew I would not be there forever so that’s why it confused me with how you were acting.”

I rolled my eyes and turned my back to him, “Did I waste my time coming here?”

He snatched my waist to shift me back in his direction and was standing right in my presence. He is so close I could feel his chest rise and fall with each breath he drew while his hands were still on my waist. Even with being pissed, I enjoyed him being this close. He closed his eyes and took a few breaths before speaking further.

“I tried... that’s all I’m saying... I tried” and then let go of me before taking a few strides back.

Struggling to retain my composure, I questioned him, “Chadwick, why did you bring me here? It sounds like you don’t want me here...,"

“I don’t know... I assumed... maybe this was a mistake” he acknowledges seeming more sad than upset.

Not speaking another word, he wandered over by the vast window by the patio and ignored me... absorbed in his thoughts.

“I love you... even after everything, I still do…,” I announced... it was all I could say.

I walked over and rested on the couch trying not to hyperventilate. Reflecting on everything over these last couple of months, I realized I could have dealt with the situation better than I did but I wish I could convey to him in words how I felt. Playing Dr. Ramirez message over and over in my mind, “It’s okay because you can move on from this because you are stronger than what you believe you are”, but I knew I didn’t want this to be over. I’m trying to stay strong but I am falling apart.

As the tears were running down my face, Chadwick appeared and sat behind me. He called out my name, but I didn’t have the courage to look at him. We remained there in silence trying to discover the words to communicate our emotions. What seemed like forever, he reached over to grab my waist again and pull me back towards the end of the couch, in between his legs with his face leaning on the back of my neck. He draped his arms around my abdomen and held me in his embrace as I placed my arms on top of his.

“I love you and I needed you here with me... that’s why I brought you here” he whispers as he kissed the back on my neck. I gripped his arms tighter when he felt his kisses fall to the side of my neck and progressing towards my ear.

“Chadwick” I whimpered struggling to suppress my moan as he bit down on my earlobe and working his tongue as I sense the shift in the atmosphere pass from resentment to sexual hunger.

Chadwick unbuttoned my flannel blouse as I was sinking my nails into his thighs and pressing my hips back on his hardness. He removed my blouse and slipped the bra straps from my shoulders with my bra coming down exposing my breast. As his lips were traveling down my shoulder blade, my body quivered as he reached to explore my breast. “Oh, Shi... Shit”, I stuttered as he played with my nipples while I dropped my hands behind my back to rake my palms against his dick underneath his pants. “Damn”, was all he could muster in between his movements and moans. I moved my hands back up to cover his grip over my breast as I twisted my face to him to run my tongue over his lips.

With getting all of this satisfaction and pressure developing in my core, I almost lost it when he ceases and nudged me so he could stand up off the couch with his erection on full glory.

“What the fu....”,

He cut me off by kissing and biting my lips. I felt his massive hands spread against my waistline, down to underneath my thighs, and raise me up in the air where he wrapped his palms on my ass. He rubbed me against him so I can enjoy him on my clit which drove me to beg for more. He paused again, and I became frustrated.

“Chadwick...” I squirmed until I focused on his eyes. The look of lust was nothing unique coming from him but this was a pleading look... almost as he was seeking permission.

I nodded my head awarding him the okay and he let out a huge sigh with a grin. He drew me closer to his face to kiss me again as he carried me to his bedroom.

************

“Chadwick... baby... I’m coming, baby, I’m com...” I shouted as I was coming for the second time.

Between his fingers and his mouth, he drove me to feel like my soul was being set free. No pain, no anger, no stress... the release I needed as I trembled as I was dissolving in pleasure.

When I came back down from my high, I opened my eyes to look at him and I jumped up when I saw his face drenched. He was glancing back at me with my essence dripping off his beard with a smirk on his face. I frantically wiped his face with my hands which baffled him but had me apologizing. I freaked out when I noticed the big ass wet spot I left on his bed.

“I’m sorry... I have never done that... I don’t know... I’m sorry,”

Dropping back down on the bed, I crossed my arms over my face feeling embarrassed. He laughed when he ascended back up over my body and laid to the side of me as he grabs my arms to withdraw them from my face. He gently turned my head, so we are eye to eye with him caressing my cheek. While I was in his trance, he reached down my body and penetrated his fingers into me, stroking in and out a few times, before pulling them out completely. Still maintaining eye contact, he put his fingers in his mouth and sucked them with a moan of satisfaction.

“You taste so fucking good... I never want you to be sorry of that. Besides, you look beautiful when you come,” he confides as he licks his fingertips.

I grinned when he moved and mounted on top of me, leaning his body in between my legs. He left kisses along my jawline as he reached up to capture one of my breasts and using his thumb to twirl my nipple. This fired a flutter throughout my body causing me to arch my back slightly. He pressed his upper body up to reach down in between us to grab his dick and rub it against my clit. I chose this moment to worship his sculpted body from his shoulders, to his chest, to his abs... he was impeccable. Once I looked down at his dick, that is when my nerves set in. He was so damn huge that I didn’t know if I could handle all of him. Chadwick must have picked up on my reception due to him asking, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah” I acknowledge now peeping up at the ceiling

“Look at me” he requested now coming to a complete pause of movements.

“I will take it slow and will follow your lead. If you need me to slow down or stop, just tell me... okay?”

I nodded, but he shouted, “Galen”, waiting for me to say it.

“Okay... I promise,”

He leaned down pressing his lips onto mine as he arranged his tip at my entrance.

“Are you sure?” he asked between kisses as I reached up to hold his face while looking into his eyes, “Yes, I’m yours.”

He slowly entered me with both of us using a concoction of cuss words ranging from “Shit” to “Fuck”. He would sink in little by little with him waiting for me to get accustomed to length and setting the pace. Once he had all of him inside me, I gripped his arms and was overwhelmed.

“Baby, baby, wait... wait a minute,” I suggested breathing uncontrollably.

“Do you need me to pull out?” he responded

“No, please don’t... I’m just not used to this fullness. Go slow, baby.”

“Okay,” he replied as he moved his hips again. I hauled him closer so I could enjoy his passion while he ravaged my neck with kisses, biting, licking, and sucking. Each time he would thrust into my pussy, his body would brush against my clit and nipples making another orgasm inevitable. I craved for more as I was becoming intoxicated from his yearning.

“Chad... Chadwick, fuck me... faster baby.”

I must have woke something up from inside him because he turned his gaze at me to examine if I was for sure but not wishing for me to change my mind.

“Fuck me... please, baby,”

He pulled out of me to sit up and pull me closer to him. He placed both of my legs on top of his shoulders and pressed down with his upper body to push my knees to my chest. “Oh shit”, I thought to myself praying I won’t regret this decision later. He slams back into me and pounds my pussy as his life revolved around on it.

“Ohhhhh... ahhhhh... ah, ahh...shiiiiiitttt,” I screamed as his dick kept hitting my g-spot over and over again with my eyes rolling to the back of my head. He moved faster and it had me grabbing for everything... him, the bedsheets, the pillow, air... hell everything at this position.

“Fuck” he howled as his moans were becoming louder. He drops my legs from his shoulders but kept them stretched wide as he gripped underneath thighs to draw me into his thrust. “Damn, baby... your pus... shit,” he couldn’t finish once I clenched around him because I wasn’t capable of holding on any longer.

“I can’t... I ca... I can’t... you will make me come again.”

“Stop holding it, let it go, baby “he grumbles as he continues to slam into me but catching him losing his rhythm a little. He lets go of one of my thighs and rubs my clit that fires me over the edge.

My body jerks as another orgasm burst through my body and I see my vision fading to black as I chant his name. He slams into me a few more times before he pulls out and comes over my abdomen. He collapses to the side of me as we both are breathing heavy struggling to recuperate from the experience we had. After he is back to himself, he gets out of the bed and goes into the bathroom. I didn’t open my eyes but I can hear the water running from the sink. As he returned to the bed, he sits between my legs as I felt the heat from the warm towel. He cleaned me up and began him snickering.

“Are you okay? Are you still with me or did I lose you?

“I trying to answer that myself, “I answer laughing and opening my eyes.

“You not ready for round 2?”

“Boy bye,” I declare shifting to my side as sleep was calling my name.

He lays behind me and holds me as he plants kisses near my ear.

“I love you, Galen,”

“I love you too, Chadwick,”

“And I’m getting my round 2 in a few hours so rest up,” he states as we both giggle as we drift off to sleep and fulfilling his wish hours later.

"I'll Fix You With My Love"

To be continued..........

Taglist: @skysynclair19 @ljstraightnochaser

Model: DJ Niara Sterling

Thank you for reading and please like and reblog if you enjoyed it… if you would like to be tagged in the next chapter, just let me know :)

#Chadwick Boseman #chadwick x reader #chadwick boseman fanfiction #chadwick boseman fan fiction #chadwick boseman smut #chadwick boseman fanfic #black reader #t'challa #black panther #chadwick boseman imagine

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moonprincess92 · 6 years

Note

you know i want all of the AUs!!! but especially that coffeeshop AU — with sprinkles of them becoming roommates and having to fake date for some mysterious reason. :D (but i‘d be happy with just the coffeeshop AU tbh.) but you know i love all of your AUs (stories in general) and love you! ❤️

it’s no coffee shop au, but i managed to do the other two - anything for you, girl! (also on ao3)

Jyn was literally already halfway to her parent’s house when she got themessages.

JynnjYYYNNNNNfuck my life apparently danielle is getting marriedFUCKFKJGIN MARRIEDPLS ANSWER THIS IS AN OFFICIAL CODE BLUE

She’d only glanced at them as she drove, but upon seeing the forebodingDanielle’s name she immediately pulled over to read them through properly.

Oh.

Oh, shit.

She hastily texted back,

AREU FUCKING KIDDING ME TELL ME UR KIDDING

Only two cars whizzed on by before he replied,

I am NOT kidding, she’s fuckingannounced it on fb????

In the next second, Jyn was furiously pulling up said Facebook, searchingfor Danielle’s profile. She was technically still friends with the woman, butonly so that she could retain the prime stalking privileges that being Facebookfriends provided. If she could, she would have blocked and deleted herMONTHS ago, but Cassian had begged her to keep her around ‘just in case, Idon’t know, so I can avoid her I guess’. It didn’t take much scrolling. Themost recent post of hers was an engagement announcement to some guy she hadliterally never even heard of, complete with professional photo spread andcurrently over a thousand likes.

Out of spite, Jyn angry-faced it.

JUSTCHECKED, MATE U WEREN”T KIDDING

OF COURSE IM NOT KIDDING

Areu drunk yet????

I’m certainly on my way

Jyn sighed, staring at her phone. She’d been planning on meeting up withher parents for dinner for months now. With her living several cities away andtheir ever-increasing schedules, it was always hard to find the time… but thisparticular crisis called for significant action. She quickly texted Cassian oncemore,

Areu at home??

I am currently on the couch of pain,yes

Don’tmove, I’ve just left work, I’ll be there soon

Before she could receive the expected ‘no, no, you go see your familylike you planned don’t worry about me’ messages, she quickly called herparents.

“Hello?”

“Mama? It’s me,” Jyn said. “Look, I know we’ve had to reschedule thisdinner like three times now, and I’m so sorry, but I won’t be able to make ittonight either.”

“What’s going on this time?” Lyra Erso sighed.

“Cassian’s ex-fiancée has just announced that she’s engaged again.”

“Oh, shit,” Lyra said at once, any trace of disappointment instantly gone. “Seriously, Danielle?”

“You understand the gravity of the situation.”

“I thought they’d only just broken up?”

“It was four months ago,” Jyn admitted. “But four months to get over athree year relationship, find someone else, fall in love, AND get engagedagain? Fuck her!”

“Jyn, go home, seriously,” Lyra insisted. “Make sure that boydoesn’t drown himself in the bathtub or something.”

“I think drowning in alcohol is more likely – thanks Mama,” Jyn said inrelief. “Can you explain to Papa?”

“Of course – OI, GALEN!” Lyra’s booming voice suddenly screeched down the other end of theline. “CASSIAN’S EX GOT ENGAGED AGAIN!”

“The girl who dumped him two weeksbefore the wedding? How dare she!”

“I KNOW RIGHT?”

Jyn figured to hang up then. It didn’t take long for her to hang a quicku-turn and swing back in the direction she had come from, but it was longenough to notice the ten or so new messages that had apparently been sentto her as she’d spoken to her parents.

“Don’t even start,” she said upon storming straight into theirapartment. “I was coming back no matter what you said, this is a Code Blue forsure.”

“Did I even use the right one? Which one was Code Blue again?” Cassiansaid in resignation. He didn’t even bother getting up from the sofa, where hewas currently laid splayed out with a half-empty bottle of wine sitting on thecoffee table next to him.

“Code Blue is ‘emotionally my life has gone balls up and I need you’,”Jyn reminded him. “Code Red is ‘I fucked up and need immediate assistance’. Wesave Code Black for ‘I’M DYING’.”

“I don’t know, I think this could be a Code Black as well, Jyn.”

“You’re not dying yet,” she snorted, snagging the wine as she sat downon the other end of the sofa, lifting Cassian’s legs out of the way anddropping them back into her lap. She peered at the bottle in her hand andasked, “Could you have bought a cheaper bottle of wine?”

“I wasn’t spending any more on her.”

“Fair point,” Jyn threw some back. Cassian gestured for her to pass itbetween them, but she shook her head before hastily drinking more. “No, no, Iclearly have to catch up here.”

“I’m not THAT drunk.”

“Try and get off this sofa.”

He glared at her for several moments.

“Case in point.”

Cassian groaned, flinging an arm over his eyes. “Honestly, how did I endup here?” he said and Jyn felt for him, she really did. When you knew someonefor nearly 10 years, you saw a lot of heartbreaks and aches. From when they’dfirst met as awkward 18-year-old’s, to now in their late twenties and honestlyjust trying to Adult without dying, the two of them had been there throughevery single disastrous relationship they’d ever had. She’d been therebefore, during and after the Danielle fiasco, and he’d been right at her sideas she’d slashed the tyres of every ex who’d ever cheated on her (tugging onher arm and practically begging that they leave before they get caught, but he’dstill never let her do it alone). There was little that they hadn’t donetogether, or that they wouldn’t do for each other, to be honest. She rubbed hisshin where it lay over her said,

“It’s gonna be ok.”

“IS IT?” Cassian pressed his fingers hard over his eyes. “I appreciatethe support but Jyn, she’s engaged. Three years apparently wasn’t even enough time to want to marry me,but four months and she’s more than happy to say yes to some other bastard? Whothe hell even IS that guy?”

“Cassian, we’ve established that Danielle is a flighty bitch who can’tdecide what she wants and you’re better off without her,” Jyn sighed. “Do Ireally have to beat it into your head again?”

“Probably.”

She leaned over and whacked him affectionately. Thing was, the nightDanielle had called off the wedding was still a very vivid memory, even allthese months later. Literally two weeks before the day, and he had turned upoutside her door out of the blue at one am. He had only been living in his newapartment with his fiancée for three weeks at that point and her first reactionhad been to think welp, SOMEONE’Sdead. Instead, he’d looked at her with an expression that she couldn’t readand had told her simply,

“Danielle left me.”

“… fuck,” she’d said in reply.

And she really hadn’t known what else to say, because what the hell elseCOULD you say? Cassian had been so dedicated, so ready to be married, so deeplyin love that the idea that Danielle had just casually told him one night, “Hey,so I don’t really think I’m ready for marriage, sorry this didn’t work out,”seemed unfathomable.

Jyn had held out her arms and Cassian had immediately walked into them.

“Can I move back in with you?” he had sobbed into her neck.

“Of course,” she’d said back.

“ANYWAY,” she said now. “I might make more jokes and hit you some more,but I’m honestly sorry, Cassian. This sucks.”

“Yeah,” he muttered through his hands.

“You can cry, I won’t judge,” she smirked.

“Fuck you,” Cassian was already attempting to smoother the tears that wereleaking through and she damn well knew it. “Honestly, this is just mostlyembarrassing. Everyone knows that we were engaged only four months ago, and sheapparently wasn’t ready for marriage then but she’s suddenly ready NOW? WHY,JYN? FUCKING WHY.”

“Hey, only a handful of people know that’s why she left,” Jyn pointedout. “If anything, everyone will be judging her for getting engaged again soquickly! That help at all?”

“A little. But I haven’t even told you the worst part yet.”

“Christ on a bike, there’s a worse part?”

“Brace yourself,” Cassian took a moment to apparently pull up somethingon his phone. In the next, he was handing her the device apparently showing atext conversation between himself and someone with the name ‘DO NOTENGAGE’.

Hey, Cassian idk if you’ve seen, butI’m getting married!! I’dlove for you to be there, of course it’s a little whirlwind hahaso we haven’t had time to send out official invites but it’s onsat 5th Aug in southlake tahoe. PLS come, I’d love to see youagain!!!! Xxxalso feel totally free to bring a plus 1 ;)

Jyn was honestly kind of in awe.

“Say the word,” she declared, staring at the offending message. “I swearto god, just say the word and I will fucking END her.”

“I’m not quite at that point, but I’ll let you know if I change mymind.”

“You’re not going. I cannot BELIEVE she had the guts to inviteyou!”

“About that…” Cassian cringed.

Oh, motherfucking shitballs.

“You already said you’d go, didn’t you?”

“Well, if I don’t go I look petty and clearly not over her!” Cassianhastily defended himself, snatching his phone back off her before she couldread his no doubt ‘omg I’d love to!!’ messages (not to mention promptly hurlinga fist into his head as well). “So I said yes out of spite, only now I thinkI’ve backed myself into a corner. I can’t go, but I can’t not go either.”

“Christ on a bike, Cassian."

"I know."

“Well, if you think you’re going alone, you got another thing coming,”Jyn pointed out, grabbing the wine. Blimey, even she needed it now. “You’reshowing this bitch one way or another that she doesn’t have a hold on youanymore.”

“I appreciate your furiousness on my behalf,” Cassian said. “but believeme when I say I am in absolutely no headspace right now to go out and find adate.”

“Oh, don’t worry, I get you,” Jyn said. “Good thing this isn’t just awedding anymore, this is a fucking war. You can’t just take anyone, you need to take someone that is going tomake a statement. Someone that people will talk about for MONTHS after. Youneed to take the one person in the entire world that would piss her off themost.”

“So… you?”

She started a little.

She hadn’t actually been thinking of herself, but now that he mentionedit, it was suddenly the perfect plan. Danielle had quite famously never exactlytrusted the over-half-a-decade of friendship between her and Cassian, despiteJyn having attempted to date several other people over the last three years andCassian being the most devoted boyfriend she thought she’d ever seen. Herand Danielle had always played nice of course and there had even beenmoments when Jyn had managed to bring herself to maybe kind of like her, butthere had always been an undertone to their every interaction that just made itclear that at the end of the day, Danielle Livesay hated Jyn Erso’s guts andprobably always would.

There was no one else Cassian could possibly take that would annoy hermore.

“Yes, me,” Jyn said. “I’m serious, you take me as your date and Daniellewill flip her fucking LID, it will be perfect!”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that–”

“Good thing you’re not asking then,” Jyn declared. “I’m insisting andit’s decided. You got yourself a fake girlfriend! For the record, I’ll cuddleyou and give you a few kisses if she’s looking in our direction, but no tonguestuff ok?”

Cassian just shook his head, trying not to laugh.

“You’re the fucking best, Jyn.”

“Of course I am. Now drink more wine, this is gonna be a longnight.”

Of course the wedding was in fucking Lake Tahoe.

Last minute AND destination, Danielle was basically guaranteeing thatthe only people who would come were either only interested in a weekend away orwere the only ones who had no plans. Cassian’s jaw had been clenched basicallyever since they had left their apartment Friday afternoon, but steadily gotworse the closer they got to stepping inside the hotel for the ceremony.

“What do I say to her, whatdo I say–” he hissed frantically under his breath as they approached the nodoubt bloody expensive hotel. She insisted that he chill the fuck out, onlythat resulted in him shutting up and staying deathly silent instead.

"God, you’re not making this easy, mate,” she pointed out.“I think I liked it better when you were talking, I could at least tell ifyou were still alive or not.”

He just let out a strangled squeak.

“Hey,” she said,reaching out and gripping his hand tightly, their fingers interwoven together.She brought them to her chest, holding him there and making him look at her.“Cassian, I get that this hurts but don’t make it about that. You can hurttomorrow, make tonight about revenge. Hold onto that feeling instead. We’llmake out in front of her a little, and then go and get smashed at the bar.Deal?”

He nodded faintly.

They were purposefully a little late to the ceremony, just to furtherprove the point that they didn’t actually give a fuck. They were quicklyushered in amidst some irritated looks from Danielle’s family. Jyn did noticethat only one of Danielle’s three sisters had apparently bothered to show up,and yet it seemed that nearly everyone from her office had taken the trip justto take advantage of the open bar later. They took up an entire row, lookingbored and passing a hip flask subtly between them.

Danielle naturally looked fucking stunning in her dress, and Jyn wassuddenly very glad that Cassian had insisted on tradition and not seeing itbefore their own wedding because turns out she was literally wearingthe exact same dress. Out of all the things to piss her off, Jyn had honestlythought it would be something more extreme, but nope. Apparently, a dress didit! That fucking dress, the one that had to be altered three times,that Jyn had helped her pick out, had reassured over manycomplimentary glasses of champagne that she looked beautiful in and thatCassian would love it, only to just turn around and use it to marry someoneelse instead… fuck her. Her husband-to-be looked kind of in shock, honestly, like hedidn’t quite know what he was doing up there in front of all these people.

Really, she knew the feeling.

Luckily, their strategic lateness meant that they had missed half theceremony, so they didn’t have to sit through too much of the gushing ‘I loveyou’s. They only caught the tail end of it, Danielle tearing up as she spokeher vows.

“Oh my god, I’m going to ruin my make-up,” she said, gaining some politelaughs. “Oh, Derek. Honestly, I don’t even know how to finish this. I thought Iknew what love was before we met, but turns out I had no idea. I am so, solucky that I found you and get to spend the rest of my life with you. I loveyou.”

Jyn glanced over at Cassian briefly as the vows wrapped up.

She had never seen the man go white before, but he was white as a sheetnow.

“I’m so glad that’s over,” he ended up grumbling through champagne onlya little while later. Thankfully, the reception was in full swing and honestly,it was almost worth all the emotional pain this weekend was so far causing justfor the sheer elaborance of it all. The dinner had been fucking amazing, and the vinyl windows had all beenrolled up to expose the ballroom to the open air and natural lakeside view.Lanterns criss-crossed the ceiling and with a DJ pounding out cheesy pop dancesongs, it was easy to get lost in a sea of alcohol and forget the whole��getting married four months after getting dumped’ thing.

“I’m still pissed that she hasn’t even come over to talk to you yet,”Jyn pointed out. “What kind of fucking host doesn’t even talk to all theirguests? It should be easy, there’s only about thirty of them who even botheredto come!”

“Honestly, I’m fine with it.”

“Honestly, I’m not,” Jyn said. “I wanna show that bitch a piece of mymind.”

“God stop talking, stoptalking, I think she’s watching us,” Cassian suddenly panicked, spluttering onhis drink as he hastily turned around. “You’re jinxing it!”

“She’s looking?”

“From the high table, I accidentally caught her eye!”

“Perfect,” Jyn reached out and wrapped her arms around Cassian’s waist.He didn’t raise an eyebrow, however, until she started running her hands up anddown his back, clearly something she didn’t usually do when hugging him andalso obviously in Danielle’s line of sight.

“Jyn…” he sighed.

“Come on! Is this not why you brought me?”

“I’m starting to re-think the idea, to be honest, she’s going to knowit’s not real, that I’m just a hopeless loser who brought his roommate as adate to his ex’s wedding–”

“Shut up, that’s just her getting into your head,” Jyn insisted. “Workwith me, here.”

Cassian sighed… before leaning forward and pressing his nose into herneck. “That’s it,” she grinned. It wasn’t quite the statement she was goingfor, but it would work for now at least. From this angle, it would look like hewas kissing her exposed neck and shoulder, and she purposefully turned ever soslightly so that her face could be seen from the high table.

Sure enough.

“Oh my god, she’s coming over.”

“Shit–” Cassian nearlyspilled champagne down her back.

“Don’t stop kissing me!”

“I’m not kissing you, remember–”

“Well, maybe you should be, because we got about twenty seconds beforeshe’s here–”

He cut her off with a sudden kiss that was just on the side ofdesperate, but she didn’t care. Honestly, she’d had worse kisses before andwith worse people. She didn’t even have long to make a spectacle of it sincebarely a second later Danielle was upon them, calling out and forcing themapart.

“Cassian! Jyn! Shit, guys, thank you so much for coming!”

“Oh, Dani,” Jyn said, cheerfully. “It’s no problem.”

“The journey wasn’t too bad?”

“Nah, we road tripped it,” Jyn carried on talking, seeing as it seemedthat Cassian had been deemed temporarily speechless. As well as she knew herbest friend… really, she didn’t know at all what he was currently thinking.Hell, she wasn’t even sure if he was even out of love with Danielle yet. Like,properly and everything. He was clearly not over her, as anyone rightfullywould be, but the man had been in love with her for three goddamn years. Thatwasn’t something you could just turn off overnight.

(Jyn knew. She had tried once.)

So she kept an arm slung around Cassian’s waist and chatted away aboutmostly meaningless things for a while until he could get his bearings (and histongue) back. Eventually, he managed to cut in over the conversation with arather strained and out of the blue,

“You – great! The ceremony was great!”

Danielle blinked a little, but otherwise carried on like normal. “Thanksso much,” she smiled daintily. “Hey, honestly it’s just good to see you guysagain! It’s been too long and apparently,” Jyn noticed her gaze harden just slightly around the edges. “I’vemissed a lot.”

“I s’pose there is a lot to catch up on,” Jyn noted. “Bodhi says hi, bythe way, and Kay says you can go something anatomically impossible.”

“Oh, Kay. He never gets old,” Danielle blatantly lied. “Not that I don’tLOVE your friends, but I was actually talking about you two! Like holy fuck,when did it become a thing? It’s so exciting!”

Her tone made it clear that it was not something to be excited about atall, but Jyn feigned the same enthusiasm anyway.

“Oh, it’s pretty recent,” she glanced at Cassian for help confirmingtheir made up story. They had spent their eight hour car journey here creatingit and honestly, it she had thought it worthy of an Oscar or two at one pointbefore they’d forced themselves to tone it down a bit.

“Hold up, hold up,” she had said somewhere around Yosemite NationalPark. “The key to a good lie is simplicity. The more dramatic, the more detailsyou have to remember, the less believable it becomes. You’re a decent bloke,but not even Danielle is going to buy that you surprised me with a weekend awayto Paris.”

“But I was going to photoshop us some photos and everything,” Cassianhad mock-complained.

“Maybe we save that story for when Danielle ultimately invites us to herthird baby shower,” Jyn rolled her eyes. “Let’s just go with the ‘we hooked upwhile watching a movie one night’ story.”

“But that one’s boring.”

“Are you kidding? It’s not boring at all,” she had insisted. “If anything,it’s the most romantic shit I’ve ever heard! I mean it’s two best friends andflatmates who have known each other for years taking a chance one night andhaving it pay off, like this is fucking romcom gold.”

“Ok, fine,” Cassian hadrelented.

She might have also thought of pitching the entire thing to Hollywood,but that wasn’t the point to be focusing on here. Danielle was still standingin front of her, impatiently waiting to hear some epic-worthy tale that couldpotentially rival her own and considering the expression that was currently onCassian’s face, Jyn knew that she was gonna have to be the one to tellit. She could practically see the man internally spiralling.

“So it just happened then, huh?” Danielle said through a strained smile.

“Yeah, one night we were watching a movie together,” Jyn quickly threwback. “Just something dumb, but it got us thinking and it was like… I don’tknow. A switch getting flicked somewhere. Next thing we knew, we were athing and we basically never looked back.”

She glanced up at Cassian. She was a little thrown to realise that hewas no longer staring at Danielle in utter distress, but now watching her. Shewasn’t ridiculous enough to insist that the story wasn’t a nice one to thinkabout – was there really anything more ideal than falling for someone youalready knew so well? Someone that you didn’t have to worry about annoying ormaking a good impression with, because they had already seen you at your 4amworst and didn’t care? – but imagining pretend scenarios wasn’t exactly goingto get you far in life. How bad would it be if she let herself indulge for aweekend? No matter how unhealthy it probably was, she wanted to pretend atleast for a little while that she had her life sorted.

(A part of her hoped that Cassian might be willing to pretend a bitlonger too).

“You know, I knew it,” Danielle hastily cut in. “I don’t know how, but Ialways knew it was you two! OMG, you’re like a movie or something!”

“You know, we had that exact same conversation on our way here,” Jynsaid, pulling back to give Cassian a pointed look.

“Well then,” Danielle’s smile was definitely edging into painfulterritory now, but that was what Jyn was hoping for. “I guess I’ll, erm–”

Jyn didn’t let her answer. She reached up and threaded a hand intoCassian’s hair, ignoring Danielle completely as she hauled him into her body.Danielle’s words died off immediately as Jyn kissed him with edge, with armswrapping around his neck and with that kind of energy that suggested that theywere only minutes away from pushing each other up against the gifts table.Honestly, she forgot the wedding, the people and the ex-girlfriend for amoment. All she knew was the inside of Cassian’s mouth and the things itwas doing to her.

Danielle hovered awkwardly for the entire five minutes it took her tofinally realise that they weren’t surfacing anytime soon.

“Well, see you guys around then!” she eventually trilled.

“–oh fucking lord,” Cassian gasped, pulling away once she was out of theirline of sight. “Oh fucking LORD, we just did that. She just did that. Am Idead?”

“Not yet.”

“I thought you said no tongue?”

“I don’t bloody know, ok?” Jyn said exasperatedly. “By the time Irealised, I had already committed. Kill me all right?”

“Nah, nah, I mean,” Cassian coughed, avoiding her eye. “the tongue wasgood.”

Honestly, a part of her wanted to simply laugh back the tongue was good? but something shot through her at his words. Maybe it was theawkward way he said them, maybe it was the fact that she could still feel himagainst her mouth, but either way something choked her throat and settled inher chest. When she looked up at him she felt her face growing hot.

Blimey.

“Jesus Christ, this was an insane idea,” he added, hastily.

“Well, we can’t go back now,” Jyn said, shaking her head. “C’mon, mate.Let’s go dance.”

(An hour later, she was still ignoring whatever it was that was in herchest).

Neither of them claimed to be good dancers, but the open bar surehelped. “Honestly, the drunker we get the better,” Jyn had added at one point,seeing as every good wedding had to be ruined by at least someone who got toodrunk to function and eventually rounded off the night with throwing up into anewly gifted vase. Traditionally, the more she and Cassian drank, the more theyembarrassed themselves and the equation only got higher when you added the twoof them together.

It was the perfect combination, really.

“CAN YOU PLAY WEIRD AL’S AMISH PARADISE?” she had screamed at the DJ atone point. “THAT’S THE SONG WE FIRST HAD SEX TO!”

“IT WAS?” Cassian had yelled back.

“JUST GO WITH IT, BABE.”

And so the last hour had resulted in many, many dances to increasinglywedding-inappropriate songs that had the guests roaring with laughter andDanielle no doubt fuming at. Jyn’s memory admittedly got a little fuzzy aroundthe fifth (or maybe sixth?) champagne, but she certainly did remember wrappingherself around Cassian and sloppily making out on the dance floor to the sultrytunes of Big Sean’s ‘I don’t fuck withyou’.

Somewhere between the sixth and seventh drinks, they discovered thephoto booth in the foyer, complete with little basket of novelty props. A largecanvas was mounted on the wall next to it, currently half full with photostrips of varying wedding guests wearing miniature hats and sunglasses. ‘Please help us make our night memorable!’ a small note read above it and Cassian had gotten the idea thistime.

“I’m going to hell for this… but Jyn, would you please make out with mein the photo booth?”

“It’d be my fucking pleasure,” she had declared.

She was still laughing about it afterwards. Their photos they hadpurposefully posted right in the middle of the canvas, complete with thescrawled message of ‘thnx 4 inviting us!’. She had lost Cassian however during a trip to the bathroom, and shetried to not make it too obvious that she was staggering back into the hall,clinging onto the nearest table to stay upright. He wasn’t waiting where shehad left him, and couldn’t see him anywhere near the dance floor. For a moment,she panicked that he had somehow tracked Danielle down somewhere and was busybegging for her back, but no, Danielle was accounted for, currently making therounds and chatting to all of her guests. She caught her eye and Jyn mock wavedwith a grin, only to turn it into a curse when the woman apparently took it asher cue to come over.

“Fucking Jesus, Dani, I’m not drunk enough for this–” she whined.

Danielle stomped to a halt in front of her. The charade was gone. Allpleasantries left at the door. This was the bitch underneath the smiles and shewas apparently not humouring her anymore.

“What is your problem?” she snapped. “Why are you intent on ruining mywedding?”

“Hey, you fuckin’ invited me.”

“I invited Cassian,” she reiterated. “If I’d known he’d be bringing you, I wouldn’t havebothered.”

“Why did you bother, though?” Jyn tried very hard to keep track of theconversation. It was difficult when one could barely stand upright. “I mean,you broke his fucking heart, wasn’t that enough? Did you really have to stompall over it, too? Who the fuck even does that?”

“Oh, like you have literally ANY idea–”

“I see you didn’t answer the question–”

“I never meant to hurt him,” she suddenly bit out. “It wasn’t as if I wanted to cancel my own wedding twoweeks before! No one wants to fucking do that, but I was getting married forall the wrong reasons. Sure, it might’ve helped if I figured out howimmature and insecure I was being a bit earlier, but sorry that I’m a dumbass bitch whotook my sweet time, ok?”

Jyn just stared at Danielle. It really wasn’t the story she had beenexpecting, but maybe it should have been. At the end of the day, Daniellewasn’t a bad person. She was certainly an annoying person, a self-centred andmanipulative person, but never bad. There was a woman in there that Cassian Andor had managed to fall inlove with after all, one that she had reluctantly called a friend. She wasstill in there.

That was good enough for her.

“Ok,” she said, simply.

Danielle nodded before taking the champagne glass out of Jyn’s hands anddraining it herself. “I am happy for you guys, by the way,” she insisted.

“You don’t have to–”

“Nah, it’s fine,” she gave a strained smile. “Honestly, maybe anotherreason I left breaking it off so late is because a part of me was secretlyhoping he would do it first.”

“Why in the hell would he have done that?”

“Because of you,” Danielle shrugged.

She found him outside.

Sat on the steps that led from the ballroom out onto the rolling lawnsof the hotel grounds, his back was only a silhouette but she knew it was him.She clung to the handrail until she could throw herself down beside him,nudging his shoulder lightly. “Hey,” she said. “you disappeared.”

He drew in a shaky, rattling breath, and it was only then she realisedthat he had been crying.

“Oh, fuck,” she said at once.

“I’m fine, Jyn.”

“No you’re not, you’re – oh,god –” She was ill-equipped to deal with emotions on her best of days! Whenshe was drunk, she may as well pat him on the head and say ‘there, there’ forall the good she could do. But still, this was Cassian so she had to try. Shewrapped both her arms around his, hugging it to her body and resting her headagainst his shoulder. Cassian sniffed loudly, rubbing a sleeve across his face,but thankfully not shoving her off. She stayed quiet until eventually, hecalmed down.

“This was supposed to be mine.”

She stayed staring off into the grounds, squeezing his arm tighter.

“All of this, Jyn. The wife, the wedding, the lifetime spent togetherforever, this was supposed to be mine. Where the hell did it all go wrong?”

“It’s not your fault,” Jyn murmured.

“Isn’t it? How did I not realise?” he said. “Honestly, there must havebeen warning signs, things that I ignored or something, because no one just dumps you twoweeks before your wedding out of the blue like that.”

“I just spoke to her,” Jyn mentioned. “Well, I say I spoke to her,it was more like she cornered me… but she said some things. Do you want me totell you?”

He shifted a little and she knew he was glancing down at her. “Yes.”

“Are you sure?”

“Jyn, I need to know why she did this.”

She took a deep breath. “She said she realised she was getting marriedfor the wrong reasons. She did love you, but she mentioned the words immatureand insecure, so I’m guessing she only said yes to getting married because itwas the way to hold onto you… maybe she didn’t quite grasp the finality of itall until it hit her…”

Cassian sighed.

“She also mentioned me.”

FUCK.

She hadn’t meant to say that part. Hell, she still didn’t really knowhow to process that particular statement herself, that part was supposed to beburied and ignored for the rest of their given lives! Christ in heaven, youcouldn’t even give drunk her one job! She had no idea what to say to try anddefuse the situation (or even if anything COULD be said) and so she ended upstaying silent, her grip on his arm loosening a little.

When she tried to pull away, he grabbed her hand in the dark and pulledher back, holding it tight.

“Ah, well,” he was apparently going to laugh it off. “We always knew shedidn’t like you.”

“Dunno why,” Jyn said. “I’m a splendid bitch.”

“Look, please don’t think I blame you–”

“Nah, nah, shut up,” Jyn quickly waved past it. “Either way, are you oknow?”

“I’m far from ok,” Cassian mentioned. “but at least I think I’ll be ableto get over it. Someday.”

“Good. Now let’s go bail early to piss her off one last time.”

“Sounds perfect.” Cassian was the first to move, heaving himself up onthe handrail before turning back to her and offering out a hand. Jyn stillwasn’t quite sure what exactly had gone down between them thisevening. More than a nothing, but less than a something… it waslike the idea of the two of them had simply been dangled teasingly infront of her nose and for the first time in her life, she was actually thinkingabout what it would be like to grab it. Jyn felt that undercurrent thatDanielle had always been so afraid of, the one that was currently thrummingbetween them, and the thoughts simultaneously terrified her and thrilled her…

(But they’d be fine. Tomorrow was a new day, and they would wakeup and this would all be fine).

She took his hand.

“Thanks for doing this with me, by the way,” Cassian mentioned in thecar on the way home.

“What, ruining your ex’s wedding for you?”

“Yeah, that,” he snorted. “We never mention the amount of kissing we’vedone to either Bodhi or Kay, by the way.”

“Oh, you can count on it,” Jyn said.

#rebelcaptain #ro fanfic #my fanfiction #LOOK I WROTE WORDS ASJDSJFD WHAT IS THIS #pls reblog me lol

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pingou7 · 6 years

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Daddy’s girls (or four times Jyn and Leia changed the story and one time they didn’t) by pingou @pingou7

The first time Jyn Erso — daughter of the Imperial scientist Galen Erso, yep, that one — sees Princess Leia Organa — daughter of Senator and Viceroy Bail Organa of Alderaan, yep, that one — she thinks nothing of her, in particular. But while her father had always called her Stardust, Jyn doesn’t take long to gather the Princess is a Supernova.

Jyn & Leia friendship. RebelCaptain - HanxLeia. Alternate Timeline.

Note: Almost a year ago I wrote this “girlie one-shot” about Jyn and Leia meeting as an entrance in the Rogue One fandom. I was intrigued with the idea of their rebellious teens. I give you a slightly revised version and the moodboard to go with it! Enjoy. (P.S: The matching tattoos with Kyber Crystal and the Rebel Logo sport the initials D.G. in Aurebesh… because I’m a perfectionist like that).

Read it on AO3 (or under the cut)

She’s a bit younger than she, a bit smaller (and that’s quite a feast, considering Jyn inherited her “petite stature” from her mother) she has a lot of luscious chocolate brown hair and eyes, fine clothes and she doesn’t talk much either, surrounded by Imperials as they are.

But while her father had always called her Stardust, Jyn doesn’t take long to gather the Princess is a Supernova.

Two hours into the festivities, Jyn (who is regularly put under the ‘useful’ tutelage of her surrogate uncle Saw Gerrera, when her father can arrange it) catches the girl sneaking out.

“You have to be constantly on alert, Jyn, your father’s name and position can only do so much,” says the leader of the Partisans in her mind. So, she follows the girl discreetly. She’s getting bored anyway, and as usual, that bastard Krennic is creeping her out. A bit of fresh air will do nicely.

She doesn’t expect to see a Princess of a peaceful planet cursing in four languages (as far as she can tell, anyway) and grumbling about forgetting her lighter. A cig is hanging hazardously between her lips, and the frown on her youthful face makes her look older. Suddenly the royal persona she witnessed earlier seems a lot more interesting to the not quite Imperial/not quite rebel girl.

“You’re smoking?” Jyn asks with amusement.

“I’m trying to, apparently I forgot my lighter. Do you have a problem with that Miss Erso?”

If someone caught her smoking, Jyn would be sheepish or at least uncomfortable. Not Leia, she’s glaring, defiant, casual and plain scary for such a tiny package. Saw did say the tiniest fighters are usually the most dangerous. The older girl shrugs in response and goes to pick a lighter hidden in her combat boots — her dress is long enough to hide them, and her dad laughed out loud when she showed him she had no intention to change for classier shoes. Leia just raises a perfectly arched eyebrow, seeing black boots under her red-silk imperial garb, but she favors her with a smirk.

“None, your highness,” she finally answers, handing her the thing with a smile of her own.

“Drop the title, my friends call me Leia.”

A few hours later, getting home in the impersonal penthouse her father occupies on Coruscant, Jyn is amazed to see she made a female friend so easily. She’s not used to open up to strangers, and she had always been surrounded by men. But something in the princess of Alderaan just clicked with her, and the kyber crystal around her neck seemed to pulse, the more they spent time together. Trust in the Force, had been her mother’s last words, and while Lyra Erso didn’t have time to transmit her faith to her daughter, she feels like their encounter had somehow been the will of the Force, indeed.

—————————————————————————————II

The second time Jyn meets Leia in the flesh, one standard galactic year has passed. They kept in touch with a surprising regularity, through letters, Holocomms and the occasional video conference, but the daughter of Galen Erso is still rendered speechless when the Alderaanian shows up at her door, on a random Saturday night.

Her father is on Eadu for the supervision of a secret project — she couldn’t accompany him, and her Uncle Saw had just started settling on Jedha. Usually, she hates being left behind, but as she takes in Leia’s unusually disheveled appearance and too bright eyes under smeared black khôl, suddenly she’s glad for being alone.

Before Jyn can find anything to say, Leia has thrown herself at her, not caring if her embrace is awkward and probably stiffer than it should be.

“Jyn, I got a brother,” she says into her neck, like some let out a curse word.

“Well, that’s good, isn’t it Leia? You’re sixteen, but I’m sure you’ll be a great sister.”

You are to me, she wants to add, apart from dad and uncle Saw, you’re the only family I have left. But she’s saved from uttering such mushiness when Leia elaborates:

“I have a twin brother, Erso, a biological sixteen year old boy with whom I share DNA.”

Said Erso blinks stupidly at her friend, and stares as the recently elected senator literally vibrates in fury. Force.

She digs out Corellian whiskey shots from her father’s cabinet, and lets the Princess vent as they indulge. Unlike Jyn, she’s a lightweight, the fine, soft and fragrant liquors which are found on her planet didn’t prepare her for the rush of alcohol the amber liquid brings, whereas Jyn participates in drinking games with some of the imperial academy, once in a while.

Leia knows he exists somewhere, she heard her father speak about him with the Senator (and secret Rebel leader) Mon Mothma, but she doesn’t who he is, where he lives and what he looks like. She has a brother, she has always known a part of her was missing, but she’s just so angry nobody ever told her about it, not even her father, and she’s a complete daddy’s girl!

Somehow, the expression strikes Jyn, and she starts to laugh: “Well, I’m one too!” she declares a bit too brightly. Leia is clearly a talkative drunk but Jyn is a happy one.

When the girls regain consciousness the following afternoon, feeling like they’ve been stamped by a few banthas, Jyn is horrified to see a small fresh tattoo on her left calf: a star, a kyber crystal and the letters D.G. But Leia only giggles when she exhibits a similar one, with a star, the symbol of the rebellion and the same D.G. Leia sometimes has to conceal it with makeup, and Jyn is always sporting socks into her practical shoes, but their secret is safe, and it’s nice to have a shared reminder of identity, friendship and happiness in a world that is getting more fickle and dangerous.

—————————————————————————————

III

The third time Jyn encounters Leia without strangers in the vicinity, teenage shenanigans are far from their minds. Jyn turned twenty-one, the Princess is nineteen, and both are thrown head first into the Rebellion.

It’s been three years since the older girl got separated from her father, seeking permanently refuge with the Partisans on Jedha. She has been trained into a terrorist, a killer, a fighter, a rebel without a cause, and she knows her idealist of a father wouldn’t like it, if he knew. But it’s been a long time coming according to Saw and she just had to find a way to survive, while making the Empire pay for tearing so many people apart from their families, from their freedom. Galen and Leia are much more subtle, molding in the Empire society while alimenting the Rebellion. It’s smart, it’s effective, but Jyn didn’t think she could do this, too.

Until her best friend sent her Cassian Andor, a Rebel intelligence officer, K2SO his reprogrammed imperial Droid and her father a deserter pilot named Bodhi Rook. And after Jedha City and its Temple of Whills got destroyed, their improbable association counted two more members: A sightless Force believer named Chirrut Îmwe and a mercenary called Baze Malbus.

By the time Jyn reached the Rebel HQ on Yavin IV, she knew she had to follow Leia’s lead if she wanted her father’s plan to succeed. Of course, the Rebel leaders were more than wary of what she said, until she caught Bail Organa’s eyes, who vouched for her and her “allegations” and had Draven into a corner. She would get Galen’s plans of the Death Star, and pass them to Leia so that the Rebellion could bring a fatal blow to the Empire.

Cassian and her group of misfits — named Rogue One — were too late to save Galen on Eadu. They got the necessary backup on Scarif, and managed to come out alive, despite massive injuries, but Leia got captured by Vader.

When the two scarred women see each other again, they’re fatherless.

Jyn is still recovering in the medbay, next to Cassian, when Leia Organa comes to sit by her bed. Her jaw is set, and she’s frowning, and intimidating and so far from the carefree princess she’d somehow grown to love as a sister. It brings tears to Jyn’s bright green eyes, but Leia’s are getting darker, almost black.

“Jyn Erso, you’re not allowed to die, ever. Do you have a problem with that?”

“None, your highness,” she finally answers, swallowing her despair and soreness with a smile.

“Drop the title, my family calls me Leia.”

The urge to sob is back, through the princess’ tone is as demanding as ever, and when she exhibits the tattoo on her calf, Jyn ignores her nausea to hug the last survivor of the Alderaanian royals, almost like she did with Cassian, when waiting for death to come on the Scarif beach. Almost, but not quite. Leia Organa is her sister in all but name, but Cassian Andor is… Cassian.

————————————————————————————— IV

The fourth time Sergeant Jyn Erso hangs out with “The” Princess Leia, the whole Rebellion speaks about it for days.

She has the reputation of being unmanageable: Imperial born, Partisan grown and Rogue within the Rebellion. Everyone knows the small Rogue One unit is a special case, that they depend solely on each other, since they refused to be decorated for their dedication to the cause. As former spy Cassian Andor was practically Draven’s man through and through, nobody understands why Senator Organa sought out Jyn — and her team, by extension.

When they had to relocate on Hoth, and sleeping quarters were attributed, the Alderaanian leader chose to refuse her private room near the commandment to share with Erso, in the corridor which holds the members of Rogue One. The fact that Luke Skywalker and Han Solo, as well as the Wookie Chewbacca were also housed in that era of Echo Base didn’t rise as many rumors, which is strange to Jyn, but much more relevant, if she musts say so.

She’s seen how Leia is with Han, and while she has nothing against same sex relationships (Chirrut and Baze are proof of that), she laughed out loud when Cassian refused to meet her eyes and asked if she was with the Princess in that way. Apparently Kaytoo had been regrouping data and he and Bodhi (influenced by the rumor mill) came to the conclusion she and the Princess were “likely to be amorously entangled”.

“She’s family,” is always their response — to Leaders, to Rebels, to Rogue One and to Solo, Skywalker and Chewie. No more, no less.

Until Draven decides to reclaim Cassian for a solo mission, now that he is healed — his back is still fragile, even after several Bacta tank immersions — but the despicable man is intent on separating “his best intelligence officer” from his team, from her. She tries to plead with Cassian as much as she can — they still hadn’t addressed the thing that exists between them — but his loyalty is foremost to the Rebellion. He smiles gently at her, takes her hand and lets his thumb graze her pulse point, but she knows he’ll do as Draven bids him to.

“Eres mi hogar, no tengas miedo, siempre volveré hacia tí mi estrella.”

“I don’t speak Festian,” she mumbles at his door.

“I know,” he replies with twinkling eyes while she gets back to her quarters.

When she gets there, it’s Jyn who rants and Leia who listens, somewhat patiently:

“I can’t forbid him to go because you’re worried about him. Draven is right, he is a good agent, and this solo mission could bring valuable information to the Rebellion. But, tell me, do you like Captain Andor, Jyn?”

Leia didn’t even brush the subject before now, but she is used to get straight answers and suddenly Jyn feels trapped. She thinks of all the times he came back for her, when he didn’t have to. She thinks of “Welcome home”, of their embrace on Scarif, of his lips on her temple when the first Death Star was destroyed, of her hand steadying his trembling back around the Base, of his jacket she took and has yet to give back.

“I don’t know, Leia. Do you like Han?”

“Why do you ask me that? He’s insufferable, and has no sense of justice and even if Luke finds him great, I think he has the ego of…”

Jyn turns Leia out as she lays on her cot, and her hand comes against her calf, where the tattoo is safely hidden by socks and heating pants. She thinks of her dad, of her mother, of Saw, of Jedha and Scarif casualties and she hopes she will never have Cassian to add to that list. When Leia retells a witty comment from Solo in which he affirmed Leia liked him because he’s a scoundrel, Jyn interjects:

“He’s right on that one, though, you liked me because I wasn’t as proper as I pretended to be. You like people like Solo and me, I find kinship in his “selfish approach”, for one, and it doesn’t mean he’s not a good man.“

"I was far wilder than you were, Erso, and you know that!”

“We were daddy’s girls, but I chose to obey when you defied yours.”

As soon as the words leave her mouth, Jyn regrets letting her guard down. Leia’s impassive senatorial mask is back in full, and the chill in the air has nothing to do with Hoth glacial temperatures this time. She’s already berating herself in her head, hearing her father exhaling “my stardust” with his dying breath, when Leia’s steely tone pierces the silence:

“I’d do anything for my family. Maybe I can’t prevent your Captain to leave the Base, but I can assign you to Solo while he’s gone, since the two of you seem so alike”.

“Thank you Leia,” she whispers, “at least we have you in common, and that’s something. Tell me,” she asks in the dark, “do you speak Festian?”

“I’m not fluent, but I can manage, why?”

“What does Eres… mi hogar… and mi estrella means?”

“It means I should take the room away from Rogue One, or that I’ll have this one to myself soon.”

“I’m serious, Leia!”“So is Captain Andor Jyn, I can assure you. If you don’t get what he said already, I —”

“Please, tell me.”

It may be the last words she’d hear from Cassian and she can’t bear not to have the slightest clue of what he meant. Jyn never copes well when people are leaving. She’s on the verge of sleep when she hears: You’re my home, my star. She’s not sure if it’s Leia, or Cassian, or Galen speaking — in her nightmare, she loses all three on Scarif.

By morning, everyone is gathered in the hangar and Jyn tries to follow the rush which precedes missions. She naturally gravitates around Rogue One, and tries to ignore Cassian while Bodhi and Luke Skywalker chat about piloting. It’s only when Han and Chewbacca join in that Leia makes her way to them:

“Han, Sergeant Erso will accompany you and Chewie on your reconnaissance mission.”

“Oh, and what about you, your Worship? You’re not up to join me for a bit of fun, anymore?”

“Corellian things make her a bit reckless, in my experience, Solo. Don’t worry, I should keep my head cold.”

Luke seems confused, Han turns even more smug, but under Leia’s glare Kaytoo declares she has a good chance to die in atrocious circumstances. Then Baze snorts, and Chirrut smiles, and Bodhi fidgets, but Cassian grows even moodier, stiffly saluting Leia before walking away. He doesn’t look at Jyn once.

—————————————————————————————+1

The next time Jyn sees Leia for more than debriefing between two missions after the Battle of Hoth, she seems almost broken, cradling Luke to her chest aboard the Falcon. Skywalker is missing a kriffing hand, Han Solo is nowhere to be seen (someone named Lando Calrissian emerges from the cockpit), and the Princess refuses to say anything. Leia Organa has nothing to say, and in the seven years or so since Jyn can call her a friend, that’s a first.

She instantly reaches for her, but her eyes are fixed on Cassian. Mon Mothma takes charge, and the Base (which is in the Endor system for now) is getting back to normal, but Jyn can’t leave Leia’s side, when she’s glued to Skywalker in the medbay. When Kaytoo, of all people, is “sent to retrieve her for the night”, Leia is still clutching her hand. Once Jyn assures she’ll come back later, the Princess says ‘I know’ in an odd voice, and the rebel doesn’t know quite to say.

As foreseen, Jyn and Cassian had started living together — Han had been a bit too flirtatious with her after they got back from Takodana, Cassian downright punched him and while furious with the whole situation Leia rattled them out loudly: “Cassian and Jyn are in love dumbass! Why don’t you try your pick up lines on someone desperate?”

“Like yourself, you mean?” The smuggler had replied, otherwise unfazed by the whole commotion. But he did send Jyn a wink when neither Cassian nor Leia were looking. Even if her best friend is still in denial, she considers Han family.

Which is why, once Cassian is here to gather her into his arms, Jyn lets the tears Leia refused to shed fall. For Han, for Luke, for Leia and for the kyber crystals, around her neck and on her skin which both seem so heavy tonight. He rocks her softly, murmuring in Festian against her hair, and Jyn wants to slip under his skin, safely curving around his beating heart, when the Corellian is frozen in carbonite. A while later, he grants her wish as much as she can expect, for if she doesn’t slip under his skin, Cassian settles under hers, proving to each other that they are alive and whole.

When Luke and Leia decide to go rescuing Han on Tatooine, Jyn wants to accompany them. But then Bodhi comes back injured from the Operation Yellow Moon and as much as she likes Han and the rest of Leia’s companions, the Rogue One crew is her family. The Jedhan pilot is her only living link to her father, besides, as Baze and Chirrut said, they have to stick together no matter what.

So she embraces Leia when they depart for Skywalker’s home planet, and the Alderaanian advises her to “remain close to her boys while they’ll be Hutt-kicking”. As usual, Bodhi is too impressed by Senator Organa to say anything, but while Chirrut smiles in the direction of her best friend, Baze grumbles about age difference — of course, Kaytoo is also bothered to be referred to in such derogatory manner, he’s not a boy, he’s a Droid and if he should belong to someone, it’s Captain Andor, certainly not Jyn Erso… But Cassian only salute politely the expedition and it’s only when they’re somewhat alone that he says he doesn’t mind being one of Jyn Erso’s boys as long as he’s the only one she stays close to. She rolls her eyes at him (he’s far mushier that he’d been when they met four years ago on Jedha) but lets him kiss her.

If she stares at her tattoo, praying to the Force for Leia’s success with her mother’s crystal in her hand, nobody says anything about it.

After that, things accelerate almost too fast for Rogue One to process, but since Scarif, each one them felt as if the Rebellion didn’t really need them. The point is, they find themselves surrounded by Ewoks, celebrating the fall of the Empire, the second Death Star is destroyed, Emperor Palpatine and Darth Vader are dead, and both Jyn and Leia have to learn how to respect their fathers 'legacy, in a freed galaxy.

Finally, when the third day of festivities is coming to an end, the two women sneak out for a while. It’s been quite sometime since Princess Leia had quit smoking, but Jyn Erso still has a lighter on her, and they pass it to Luke, since he “needed to light a fire for personal reasons” (must be a Jedi thing). As they watch him walk away, his sister brings out a flask of Corellian whiskey — which she certainly got from Han — and both daddy’s girls toast it to the starlight sky:

For Galen, for Bail.

#star wars #moodboard #fanfiction #jyn erso #princess leia #rebelcaptain #hanleia #au timeline #rogue one #pingou writes #bringing this back #aesthetic

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anamelesstraveler · 6 years

Text

So this is an idea I came up with that started as a vague, tragic plot full of pining and ot3 feels. Previously doomed to never see the light of day. But then I got hit with an inspiration brick today and this is what came out of it: a tragic start of a longer fic I hope to write.

So enjoy this little preview of the pain to come! LORD HELP ME, WHAT HAVE I DONE.

--------------------------

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Bodhi wonders if he’ll ever get used to any of this.

This, meaning, getting shot at. This, meaning, getting shot.

Fuck, everything hurts.

“Stay with me, Bodhi,” Cassian’s voice hisses into his ear. He’s never heard Cassian this scared before. His hand is a brand on Bodhi’s hip, clutching so tightly that it would hurt if Bodhi wasn’t already in so much pain. Bodhi’s arm is slung over Cassian’s shoulders, but the pilot isn’t being so much supported as he is dragged at this pace. His mind fuzzily conjures up memories of being hauled across Jedha’s frigid desert, missing a step out of every three that taken by his captors. The sick, dizzy flying feeling is the same, but this time it’s all under the fire-edged pain radiating from the hole in his side.

And this time, he trusts his “captors” with his life.

“They’ll be on us in 20 seconds. We need to move,” Jyn snarls behind them. Bodhi doesn’t need to crane his head back to know she’s got a blaster pointed in the direction they came, sharp eyes scanning the shadows. She’s somehow managing to take both rear and point at once, dashing around them as they head for a side passage to check for obstacles. Bodhi wishes he could help, but Cassian’s blaster had almost slipped out of pain-numb fingers three blocks back, and he hasn’t dared to ask for another try.

“Jyn,” Cassian admonishes, an unduly harsh note to his voice. The tone is one that always means trouble, and Jyn whirls around, eyes flashing.

“No, no, it’s okay,” Bodhi pants. They’re both scared. They’re both so scared that it’s making them snap at the tiniest things and that’s just making them angry and scared and, Force, that’s the last thing they need. “She’s right. I can go faster.”

It’s a brazen lie, and the fact that neither of them seem to catch it should tell him just how bad this is. Bodhi does his best to pick up the pace anyway. Forcing his legs to push against the ground, to grit his teeth past the surging agony.

He barely makes it to the end next corridor they cut down before his vision goes gray at the edges and his knees buckle under him.

“Bodhi!” he hears his name in stereo, because suddenly Jyn is there at his other side, helping Cassian lift him back up. A hand cups his face, too large to be Jyn’s. But it’s her face swims into his vision first. Under the too-saturated station lights she looks pale. The unaffected mask of sheer grit that she oftens wears is gone. Her eyes wide, emotions cracked wide.

He hasn’t seen her look like this since Galen died.

“M’okay,” he slurs. It’s another lie. And yet again, he’s not called on it. He lets himself be dragged this time, his feet unable to stay under him. “What… what kind of idiot fires a blaster in a station anyway?” he attempts to joke. “Who’s training these stormtroopers?”

Neither Jyn nor Cassian laugh.

This was supposed to be a simple mission. It’s always the simple ones that bite them in the ass. They were supposed to make contact with with informants on the Arah station, get the data package, and ship out. Alerting the station’s stormtroopers had not been part of the plan. The shuttle getting seized had not been part of the plan. Neither had getting shot.

Bodhi’s back hits the cold wall, making him jump and his entire body seize up. He blinks the stars from his vision. They’ve reached the escape pods. Bodhi is propped up beside the hatch, Cassian’s hand at his chest the only thing holding him up at this point. He and Jyn are slicing into the control panel, muttering to each other in tense, clipped voices that Bodhi can’t quite make out. His head is throbbing. Everything hurts.

He trusts they can do it. It barely even occurs to Bodhi that somehow they can’t. Between the two of them, they’ll override the docking locks and mask their life signatures from the station’s control room. The two of them are the best slicers Bodhi knows, and probably the most skilled survivalists he’s ever heard of. They’ve gotten through Jedha. Scarif. Yavin IV. They’ve survived the Death Star - three times. Survived an entire battalion of troopers. What’s one squad?

But the pounding of armored boots are echoing ever closer. The distorted sound of trooper comms getting clearer. And Bodhi… he risks a glance down at his abdomen, and gently pulls his hand away from the blaster wound. It doesn’t bleed, of course, but it’s… seeping. The smell of burnt flesh wafts up to him, and Bodhi fights not to gag. Trying to figure out if the shot hit anything vital doesn’t help.

Right.

Bodhi pulls his feet back under him, and chokes back a scream as he hauls himself upright. He gently grasps Cassian’s wrist. His fingers twitch, absentmindedly delving under the sleeve of the spy’s jacket, tracing tendons and delicate bones. He savors every second of the fleeting touch. And then he slowly, painfully shuffles closer. “How’s it going?” he asks.

“Nearly done,” Cassian tells him. There’s a waver under the gentle answer. Something more than adrenaline. Something deeper and far more unsettling.

“The last thing is the coupling override,” Jyn clarifies. “Just a few more seconds. Then we’re out of here. There’s got to be a medkit in this thing.”

They don’t have a few more seconds. And Bodhi doubts an emergency medkit in one of these things can… well.

“Good,” he says quietly. His hand sticks as he pulls it away from the wound.

And he pushes Jyn and Cassian through the open hatch.

Their dismayed shouts are cut off as the door slides shut behind them with a pressurized hiss. Jyn is fast, she’s always been, almost as fast as Chirrut, and nearly gets a hand around the hatch before it locks. “Bodhi!” her cry is muffled through the glass.

“What are you doing?!” Cassian all but screams. “Open the door. Bodhi!” Bodhi ignores them. Ignores them pounding at the hatch, shouting his name. He punches commands into the control panel, thankful that the complicated slicing has already been taken care of. As usual, Jyn and Cassian have done all the hard work. They’ve pulled their own weight and his along with them, literally and figuratively. Just like they always have. But Bodhi can do this, at least.

Galen had once told him that if he were brave enough, he could always do the right thing. That if he listened to what his heart told him, it would never lead him wrong. So Bodhi had defected. He’d stared death and fear in the face and he’d lived. And then what?

He’d wasted it. He’d forgotten Galen’s advice.

He’d wasted so much time. Bodhi had spent so long being afraid and now… for what? There were no chances left, except this one.

He lifts his eyes again. Meets Jyn’s stricken gaze through the glass. (He’s doing this to her. He’s making her watch as her family leaves her. Again.) Meets Cassian’s anguished eyes. (Cassian knows. He knows all too well about tough choices. About giving it all for something.)

“I love you,” he tells them.

The fear he’s been clinging to isn’t here now. Because there’s no time for them to reject him. There’s actually a twisted satisfaction in watching their expressions go slack; in watching them read his lips; in watching the realization wash over them.

Bodhi smiles. It hurts. It feels like he can’t breathe. “I love you both so much.” His shaking fingers find the manual eject key. “Take care of each other.” He presses it.

The blast doors slam across the viewport, breaking off their muffled screams of his name almost before they reach Bodhi’s ears. He hears the pod’s engines fire, the rush of air as it’s shot from the station to safety.

And then there’s only silence. Silence, and Bodhi’s harsh, tormented gasps. Silence and the sound of approaching stormtroopers.

Bodhi draws himself up, a ruthlessly suppressed sob in his throat, and limps back the way they came. If he’s doing this, he’s going to give Jyn and Cassian every spare moment he can.

May the Force protect them, even if Bodhi has to give his last breath for it.

----------------------------------

END. FOR NOW?

#RebelCaptainPilot #JynCassianBodhi #Star Wars #fanfic #Jyn Erso #Cassian Andor #Bodhi Rook #Let me weave you a Dream

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senatorrorgana · 7 years

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Hope Is Not Lost - Seven

a/n: here it is finally! i meant to get this done earlier today but, you know, mass effect andromeda addiction at the moment, oops. either way, i hope you guys like this chapter! <3

rating: m

ao3: (x)

Hatred, betrayal, sadness, heartache. All of these emotions and more were coursing through Jyn, switching back and forth in a matter of seconds while tears welled up in her eyes and she started at this…stranger in front of her with a bright red mark in the shape of her hand across his face.

She shouldn’t have felt those things, she had been playing the same game as he had, or at least that was her first intention. Jyn had to admit it to herself that he stopped being a mission after they first went to bed together and he made her feel so wanted – like she was the only person in the whole galaxy when she was under his gaze. He made her forget about her intentions, but she was his mission as he so cruelly put it, something to be manipulated and used for the better of the Rebellion, a tool. She was never any good at intelligence gathering either way, she put too much of her heart into things she knew weren’t real, she was too much like her mother as her papa would always say.

“Your mission?” she hissed at him, she didn’t care in that moment if anyone saw or heard them as reckless as that was, she wanted answers, not more lies. “You used me for the kriffing Rebellion?”

“Like you weren’t doing the same!” Cassian lashed out now, Jyn recoiling back from him at the sudden tone, but also realizing that he knew she’d done the same – a far better intelligence operative than she had ever hoped to be.

“I was, at first!” Jyn admitted, yelling back at him trying to summon all the anger boiling within her to keep her from falling apart; that she was good at. “You didn’t notice I didn’t ask questions about you or the Empire? You think I was screwing you for my health or something? I was dumb, I trusted you, I fell for whatever kriffing charm it is that you have! I tried to use you, but I’m not like you, I can fight my way out of things, not manipulate people, I got emotional and I didn’t care who you were.”

Cassian stood there, surprise written all over his features, especially in his eyes that were now wide and locked onto her. He wasn’t even manipulating her right now and here she was, spilling out her guts to him like the stupid love-sick girl she’d let herself become.

“Just…just forget about it alright.” Jyn wiped the stray tears from her eyes and tried to compose herself again.

“Jyn – “

“You’re supposed to get my father out of here, right? To go talk to whoever it is in charge of you rebels and stop this death machine they’re building? Then do your job, get him out of here.” She snapped.

“I’m getting the both of you out of here.” Cassian responded.

“The Rebellion doesn’t care about me, just get my father out.” Jyn didn’t want to be near him anymore, even if it meant staying here and being executed for being a rebel, she’d rather do that.

“I’m not leaving you here.” He urged her.

“I’m not giving you a choi – “

Before Jyn could finish her sentence, Cassian closed the distance between them, his hands gripping her waist firmly as he pulled her to him, his lips crashing down on hers. She tried to push away at first, every fiber of her being wanted to, but no matter how she tried, her attempts came off as light nudges until she gave in and wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him back with all her might. The same enamored part of her brain that let her fall victim to him in the first place took over, rationalizing that he was a rebel on the same side she was, that made him somewhat more accessible knowing now that he wasn’t an Imperial senator. On top of that, he seemed to want her, he was going out of his way and against his mission to get her out of here, but could she trust him fully? Perhaps not yet, but she could try.

When he finally released her from their embrace, the both of them panting and desperate to fill their lungs with air again, Jyn made sure to put distance back between them. She could work with building up trust again, on both sides since they were both guilty, but she wasn’t going to just leap back into bed with him; there were far more important things now anyway, such as getting her father to trust Cassian and get the hell off of this rainy hell planet controlled by the Empire.

“Come to the lab after dinner, I’ll talk to my papa first so he knows. He won’t trust you, you do know, that right?” Jyn asked, trying to reroute the conversation to something serious, something they needed to focus more on other than whatever their relationship was.

“I’ll just have to earn his trust then.” Cassian sighed.

“Just…tell him the truth, tell him everything you can so he’ll believe that you’re actually trying to get us out of here. I’ll tell him what I can, but he’ll listen if you’re honest with him.” Jyn stated.

“I’ll tell him what I can.” Cassian assured him.

“Bring your droid too, I know he’s not Imperial programmed, I saw him chipping off some of his paint a few days ago. I thought you just tinkered with him and a wire got lose, guess I know now he’s reprogrammed.” Jyn said.

Jyn didn’t know what she was going to tell her papa, she didn’t know how she was going to tell him what she had done really.

The messy bits were bound to come out, that she’d been a fool and put her heart into something, that she even considered falling in love with what she thought was an Imperial senator because of the sorry excuse that he was different. Or the part where she had gone against his orders either way to stay away from him in the first place and directly defying that; either way, he wouldn’t be happy, and trying to convince him to trust Cassian would be another problem in itself – especially after he finds out about the messy bits.

“Papa?” she asked as she entered the room tentatively, eyes scanning the lab to ensure he was in there alone.

“Jyn, there you are, I’ve been looking for you, I wanted to show you the kyber – “

“I have to tell you something, papa…about the senator that’s here.” Jyn started with, while she wished she could just listen to her father about the kyber and trail off about her mother that he missed so much, this had to be out in the open.

“What’s wrong, stardust?” he asked, concern flooding her papa’s eyes, fearing the worst right away; he always did whenever it came to her. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine.” She assured him right away, not wanting his worry to drag out where it wasn’t needed. “I just…I need to talk to you about it, and you’re not going to like what you’re going to hear, but I just need you to listen, okay?”

Galen nodded, pulling up a seat beside him for Jyn to sit and speak. Her papa was always good at listening, he looked over everything analytically, until it came to having to do with her emotions. She’d try to leave that for last if she could, she needed him to hear the facts first so he could analyze everything, she couldn’t let his emotions cloud his judgement on trusting Cassian or not.

She told him everything that she knew, everything that Cassian had told her that she remembered through her own clouds of emotion. Galen listened, nodding and asking questions when he felt they were right to ask and assess the situation better. And then she got to the messy bit, the part where she’d started to care for Cassian before she knew who he was, the part that she still somewhat did despite everything because they were both at fault for using one another and somewhere along the way they both cared. His face was unreadable then, he just listened and stared at her, Jyn always hated when he got like that, the same expression he used when Krennic came around.

“You still trust him, after all of that?” Galen finally asked once Jyn had finished her story.

“Do I trust him to get us out of here? Yes, I do. Do I trust him with…with my heart and emotions? No, not yet, not again at least.” Jyn explained. “He can get you out of here papa, we can take your copy of the plans and leave this place behind, we could get another chance.”

“I’ve had enough chances, but for you my stardust, I’d do anything to give you another chance at life.” Galen assured her. “I’ll listen to what he has to say, listen to his plans on leaving this place, if it’s good enough, we’ll leave as soon as we can, we have to remember to get Bodhi out as well, he’s done so much for us, he wants to get out just as badly as we do.”

“Then we’ll make sure he knows that. Bodhi could help getting us out too, he knows where to fly to be off the radar, he could find us a safe route out.” Jyn assured him, though it was mostly for her own reassurance.

“We’ll get through this.” Galen brought her in for a hug and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

Jyn knew her papa and how he thought, he was going to try and make sure that she got out, he didn’t care about himself. But she cared about him, and she was going to make sure that he got out of this cursed place in one piece weather he liked it or not.

Cassian wasn’t sure what his plan was going to be to get the Erso’s off of Eadu.

Kay had been downloading maps of the facility from the other droids, getting a layout of the place and passing by exits to assess the security around them. He determined that escaping via a cargo shuttle would be best, they all went to Jedha which was less than ideal, but if they were able to get in contact with Saw Gerrera from there, perhaps he could get them a ship that wouldn’t be tracked. It was risky, too many “ifs” for Cassian’s liking, but most of his important missions ended up like this, risking his life was nothing new, but risking Galen and Jyn’s lives, that was something he couldn’t afford to risk so haphazardly.

When Cassian walked into the lab, Galen’s icy cold glare locked on him, he never wanted to turn and go the other direction faster than he had wanted to in that moment.

#rebelcaptain #therebelcaptainnetwork #rebelcaptainficrec #my writing #rogue one #cassian andor #jyn erso

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him-e · 7 years

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Maybe Im just being harsh, but i don't get how people think RO was so much better than TFA. In my opinion RO lacked severely in character development which really caused a disconnect. People give TFA crap for being a rehash of old stuff, but RO has them too, and even more fan service i think. I also found the third act of them actually getting the plans to be so muddled and ridiculous. I don't think TFA doesn't feel like a star wars film just because time has passed and characters have changed

I think at the end of the day it’s a matter of personal taste. RO and TFA are two different ways of rehashing/expanding a known story. TFA is a sequel while RO is more like a “missing moments”. This is already a basic difference—some people naturally prefer the former and others the latter. Especially because in the latter the outcome is fixed, so there isn’t a lot of wiggle room with the characters and their destination in the first place. You must be inclined and willing to watch a story that you already know in advance isn’t going to end well.

RO lacked severely in character development which really caused a disconnect

Eh, I wonder where this perception comes from, actually. Because what I see is a two hours movie starring an ensemble cast who is just as developed as it gets in a two hours movie with an ensemble cast. Okay, we have characters like Baze Malbus who objectively get little characterization. We could have seen something more of Bodhi—his defection, the moment Galen entrusted him with the mission—and of Galen himself as well. Krennic, as a villain, is weak and doesn’t really work, because the film spends more time on cgi!Tarkin than him (I would add Vader to this complaint, but I won’t, because I’m too busy fangirling over his scenes. Nope, I think Vader was used splendidly).

RO is a standalone film constricted within the boundaries of a necessarily fixed ending. Narrative-wise, character-wise, the horizon is much wider in TFA. I wonder, is Cassian really lacking character development compared to, I dunno, Poe? Is Finn’s defection actually better written than Bodhi’s? Do Jyn’s actions—her going from refusal of the call to accepting the call—make less sense than Rey’s? And why?

I think one of the reasons the TFA characters are perceived as “better” developed lies in the potential. Anticipation of their future arcs and developments makes the way they’re written in TFA much juicier, it adds layers that aren’t necessarily there yet, it creates expectations, it encourages daydreaming about possible future scenarios (and ships!). This isn’t possible with RO, unless you leave canon behind and go full au route. Another example: TFA gets the luxury of telling us NOTHING about Rey’s backstory, nothing, just hints and a big ass mystery about who her family is, because it will explained in future films. Jyn’s backstory is laid out because there’s no other option, it’s now or never. Of course it’s not perfect. And of course people prefer Rey’s vague promise of a backstory because they can project whatever they like on it, while Jyn’s is fully established, and apparently not tragic enough to justify her abrasiveness? You might complain that Jyn’s story is cursory, or not satisfying enough, that her relationship with Galen and Saw is barely sketched, and okay, these are valid complaints but at least the backstory is there, instead of being handily postponed to the next episode to create artificial hype. (and while I’m at it, I wonder how much of the audience’s fascination with Rey revolves around her ~lost skywalker~ aura, rather than her actual identity as an orphan who grew up alone in Jakku? Do people really like Rey as a character, or do they like the puzzle and the skywalker mantle?)

Anyway. I agree that the third act of RO, minus the final sacrifice, is a bit muddled and—let’s just say that I would have loved to see less explosions and a more elaborated plan to infiltrate the Scarif base (which I think would also have offered less stiff, more organic ways to show the villains and have the heroes interact with them). But then again, the whole movie is muddled, due to the reshoots (TFA surely has a better flow). Also yes, if you go beyond the surface, you’ll see familiar patterns in RO as well (first act: set up + characters meet + the bad guys do something awful revealing how Evil they are + daring escape; second act: regrouping + meeting the Rebellion/Resistance; third act: hitting the bad guys in their ridiculously small and accessible weak spot, be it the oscillator or the death star’s plans + big battle ensues). However, I think RO simply does a better job at dissimulating these staple points, and that, combined with a less simplistic narrative (more moral complexity, the good guys have also done Bad Things, etc.) gave the audience the impression of a more innovative, less derivative movie. Some of it may be just smokescreen, but it clearly didn’t go unnoticed.

Re: the fanservice, idk. What feels more fanservice-y, the death star appearing in a movie that’s explicitly about stealing the death star’s plans, or something that looks exactly like the death star, just bigger and called starkiller? Is it that weird to see Darth Vader, Leia, Tarkin and Mon Mothma appear in a movie ending half an hour before ANH kicks off? Is that more of a cop out to win the audience’s approval than having a carbon copy of the Empire rise 30 years later? (not that it matters, because at the end of the day, Star Wars is the infinite fight for freedom against oppression and totalitarianism, and the specifics may wary but must always be instantly recognizable, but I digress)

Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t think Rogue One is necessarily “better”—I like TFA, a lot. The characters that are really going to engage me in the long run are Rey, Kylo and Finn. I like the Rogue One crew, but I also feel like it’s a well that is going to be soon extinguished, as personally I tend to thrive with serialized fiction rather than standalones. Also note that like I said I think TFA was a necessary step to ensure continuity between the old and the new canon; without TFA paving the way, I don’t think Rogue One could have existed.

But I would also like to see Episode VIII take more risks and wander a bit in uncharted territory. Not that Rogue One is exactly uncharted territory, but it has some things I’m interested in (e.g. more nuances/shades of grey in the Rebellion/Resistance, not-likeable-at-all-costs protagonists, not-skywalker-at-all-costs protagonists, exploration of those who are more or less willingly affiliated with the Empire/First Order, etc). We shouldn’t be having a competition between the two movies, because, despite being part of the same ‘verse and the same new canon, they’re like apples and oranges. Neither film is perfect, and it’s ok to like one better than the other. RO was more of an experiment though, so they logically had more creative freedom than with TFA, which on the other hand had no option but become a worldwide success, so they played safe. I think people expressing their appreciation of Rogue One is a good thing for the franchise, because it’s the first movie that doesn’t belong to a trilogy, and it can pave the way for new stories to explore in this ‘verse. It means the creators will be more comfortable expanding new aspects of the sw universe in the sequel trilogy too, instead of limiting their options to the usual paths.

#anon #asks #sw asks #sw**#tfa talk #sw for ts #////#rogue one #star wars #sw wank #discourse

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spooky-ghostwriter · 7 years

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Dressed to Kill - Chapter Nine

<– Previous Chapter

Next Chapter –>

Tsukiko parted the curtains of her trailer window. It had been a full day's drive around Lake Erie. All of the driving had been done by non-performer employees – particularly those with the drivers' licenses that Tsukiko herself lacked – so from her perspective, it had been a fairly uneventful period. Still, despite not having any of the stress that she imagined came with driving around trailers full of ghost lions and elephants, she was happy to see that they'd arrived at their destination.

Tsukiko hadn't considered it at first, but in retrospect, it had been incredibly obvious – circus performers' trailers were not large. Her new bed was smaller than she was used to and even it took up a good third of her available space.

Still, her trailer had felt empty. Her bedroom at her parents' house had had Gary's enclosure as a centerpiece, but now Tsukiko's snake was in the care of Pierre and his crew. The props and costumes that had once littered her room's floor were now in storage somewhere. Tsukiko had to admit, they were likely more organized than she'd ever kept them.

And so, Tsukiko's trailer contained only a bed and a mini-fridge; both of which were already in the trailer when she'd walked in. She made a mental note to see how Galen was using his trailer's space and copy it.

As she sat on her bed, imagining the walls covered in posters, there was a knock at the door.

Oh, speak of the devil, Tsukiko thought.

She pushed open the door. As the thought was still on her mind, she greeted her visitor with a question. “Hey Galen, would it be weird to put a picture of Gary on my wall?”

Vercingetorix blinked.

“Oh, you're not Galen,” Tsukiko realized.

“Indeed I am not,” Vercingetorix confirmed. “Gary is your snake, right?”

“...Yes,” Tsukiko admitted.

“You're free to do whatever you want with your trailer, as long as we can still move it from city to city,” Vercingetorix explained. “Most performers here decorate their trailers with mementos from their favourite or most important shows.”

Suddenly remembering the reason he was there, Vercingetorix opened the briefcase he was holding. It was the very same metal briefcase that Vercingetorix had held the Tank Top in. For a moment, Tsukiko was breathless – she imagined the wonders of a second Religalia that Vercingetorix might give to her.

“I have the schedule for this week's shows.” Vercingetorix passed a stapled set of papers to Tsukiko. “You'll be performing one show a day.”

“O-okay...”

“Is something the matter?” Vercingetorix asked. “If you're worried about having fewer shows than the other performers, that's just because you're new. Once you're used to the routine, we'll bring you up to an alternating schedule of two shows one day, one show the next.”

“No, it's not that,” Tsukiko tossed the schedule onto her bed. “It's just that...” She scratched the back of her head, trying to word her question appropriately. “Is the schedule really the most important thing right now?”

“Of course!” Vercingetorix said, sounding affronted. “One cannot have a circus without some semblance of order.”

“What about the plant monsters?”

“Dryads.”

“Whatever. What are we doing about them?”

“It's a little cool for dryads this morning,” Vercingetorix said, looking up to the overcast. “I don't think they'll be a problem.”

“You don't think – ” Tsukiko stammered. She sighed. “Okay. Fine. I don't want to fight any plant monsters anyway. But can you at least show me the other Religalia?”

Vercingetorix nodded to himself. “I suppose. Meet me at Stage 1 during Pierre's show. I'll make some time.”

Stage 1 was the largest of the four. The tent around it stood almost 40 feet in the air; it was the beacon that attracted people to the circus as a whole. Two towers of scaffolding held the tent in place, with a large 'Alesia Circus' logo between them. The stage covered most of the available space, with seating for over 700. Tsukiko would have loved to watch Pierre lead his ghost lions around – or, for that matter, to perform on the stage herself. Instead, she stood backstage, awaiting Vercingetorix.

Still, even if the sights and sounds eluded her, the smells and tastes were up for grabs. Tsukiko passed the time by shoveling caramel corn into her mouth as fast as her unfortunate need to chew and swallow would allow.

Finally, a few handfuls into her third bag, Vercingetorix stepped out of the Stage 1 tent.

“Ah, there you are,” Vercingetorix said, noticing her.

Tsukiko swallowed two cheeks' worth of caramel corn.

“Free circus food is one of the greatest perks of working here, wouldn't you say?” Vercingetorix asked.

“This is the best caramel corn I've ever eaten!” Tsukiko said, pointing ecstatically at the few kernels remaining. “What's your secret?”

“It's not something that should be disclosed to the public,” Vercingetorix said, his voice suddenly low and ominous. “But, sufficed to say, dryads come in many shapes and sizes.”

Tsukiko pictured five ears of corn stacking together to create a behemoth, just as the pumpkins had. With no emotion on her face, she dropped her current handful of kernels back into the bag.

“I'm joking,” Vercingetorix said with a smirk. “I don't know what the secret is. And, just like I won't ask how you perform any of your magic tricks, I won't ask our chef how he makes his caramel corn.”

Tsukiko tentatively ate another kernel, but her eyes narrowed in a suspicious glare.

“Now, onto the Religalia,” Vercingetorix said, unlocking his briefcase.

A shiver of eagerness crept up Tsukiko's entire body. The Tank Top had caught her attention even before it transformed into a mobile cannon. She remembered the strange allure it had; some glimmer of specialness emanating from every stitch.

As Vercingetorix reached into the briefcase, she stared at it in anticipation. Finally, he pulled out his hand.

Tsukiko felt her eyes widen.

Vercingetorix held a woolen sweater. It was a garish pink, with a needlessly bright yellow 'J' knitted on the chest. On its sleeves were flame designs that graduated from the same yellow of the 'J' to a bloody crimson.

It was hideous.

“This is the Jumper,” Vercingetorix introduced. “The second Religalia I'd like you to try.”

Tsukiko said nothing, and decided it best to hide her expressions behind a final handful of caramel corn.

“Now,” Vercingetorix continued, oblivious to Tsukiko's pained reaction. “To truly master a Religalia, you must be able to believe in it, no matter how impossible its abilities seem. Think of it like an actor being fully immersed in their role. To get the greatest performance, the actor must believe that they are the character they are trying to represent.”

“Are you sure? I had no idea what the Tank Top would do.”

“Precisely,” said Vercingetorix. “At the moment you activated the Tank Top, your mind was full of desperation, not doubt. You didn't know what the Tank Top would do, but you believed it would do something to save yourself, Galen, and your audience. And no matter how impossible that sounds, you believed it.”

Once again, Tsukiko didn't know how to respond to this. What he said was true, but she couldn't help but feel that he was calling her naive.

“I truly respect that conviction in the impossible,” said Vercingetorix. “The Tank Top is, in fact, one of the hardest Religalia to master. Most people don't believe it can transform into a tank.”

“Even after they see it happen?” Tsukiko asked.

“One's eyes can be deceived. You, of all people, should know that.”

“Well sure, but after fighting living pumpkins, what else is there for people to think is impossible?” Tsukiko asked.

“That is exactly the attitude I was hoping for from you,” said Vercingetorix. He passed Tsukiko the ugly sweater. “That's why I'm not going to try to trick you with this Religalia. I will tell you exactly what the Jumper does, and hopefully, you won't doubt it for an instant.”

Tsukiko turned the garment over in her hands. The back side had another knitted fireball and was no less ugly than the front.

“Try me.”

Galen made his way through the field reserved for Pierre's animals. An L-shaped tent lined one corner, housing the enclosures of a few small animals. As he passed through it, he stopped at the tank that now housed Gary. The snake was coiled under a hollowed rock, but he poked his head out as Galen approached. Gary flicked his tongue up in greeting.

“Hey, buddy,” Galen said softly. “Sorry, I don't have time to play right now. I have to help wash the elephant.”

He was relatively sure that Gary didn't understand what he said, but the python seemed to relax and stretched itself out under its heat lamp.

Along the way, Galen rested his arms on the railing surrounding Pierre's alligator pit. Some shows involved Pierre or an assistant sticking their head in the largest alligator's open jaws. Now, the three of them looked no more dangerous than Gary. In fact, they were stretched out under a bright heat lamp just as Gary was.

Before he could enjoy the view too much, a monkey jumped onto him and grabbed the back of his head. Galen recoiled as the monkey began to howl; he wondered just how much force he could use to remove it without causing it any harm.

While flailing, Galen turned; Pierre was standing a few feet behind him.

Pierre snapped his fingers; the monkey bounced off Galen's head and ran up to sit on Pierre's shoulders.

“Th-thanks,” Galen said, breathlessly. “I don't know what got into that monkey.”

“I told him to do zat,” Pierre said. “You are supposed to be washing ze elephant. Now move!”

Galen muttered some vague apology and ran off.

Betsy the elephant didn't appear to have noticed Galen's lateness. She had a large, fenced-off field to herself, and was frolicking around enjoying the free space while she could. She toyed with a tree branch, swinging it across the autumn leaves on the ground as if raking.

A senior stagehand, by the name of Jeffery, waved both the elephant and Galen onto a raised platform. It was a simple basin that had nothing more than a drain in it, but it was large enough for Betsy to lie down and stretch. Galen and his elder took turns spraying the beast with hoses connected to some water system Galen didn't yet understand.

“You're late, Mark,” said Jeffery, watching Betsy play in what was rapidly becoming mud.

“Sorry about that – ”

“Ah, don't worry about it,” The large, bearded man said cheerfully. Galen mused that, if it weren't for Jeffery's harsh Boston accent, he would have made a perfect Santa Claus. “Did Pierre hit you with the monkey?”

Galen nodded. His boss laughed.

“It's fine. Just don't mistreat any of the animals and he'll warm up to you eventually.”

Galen looked past Betsy to the pen that housed the ghost lions and beyond even that back to the alligator. “I was sort of worried when I heard how many animals were kept here. But it looks like they're all taken care of properly.”

“Of course. Y'know, Pierre is the only reason we're allowed to have an elephant in the first place.”

“Oh?” Galen asked, deciding that continuing the small talk would improve what seemed to be a good first impression.

“Yeah. Pierre started as an exotic vet, then a zookeeper,” said Jeffery. “By the time he joined the circus, he had so many licenses that he can keep any animal he wants. Including some that aren't even supposed to exist.”

“Like ghost lions?”

“Like ghost lions.”

The two of them continued to wash and admire the elephant for a few minutes. Then, Galen saw something out of the corner of his eye.

“Jeff...” Galen said. “How many monkeys does the circus have?”

“Just one. Why?”

Galen now looked in the direction of Stage 1. It was hard to tell from a distance, but it looked like a humanoid figure standing on the 'Alesia Circus' sign.

“Well I'll be,” Jeff said, shading his eyes with his hand. “That's no monkey! That's a person.”

“One of our guys?”

“Must be! But they're supposed to use the crane to take that thing down.” He took the hose from Galen. “I'll finish up here. Go check out what's happening and radio Vercingetorix if there's an issue.”

Galen tapped the walkie-talkie on his belt.

“Got it.”

It was a jog of annoyance that drove Galen across the field to Stage 1. He wondered how someone had even managed to climb the tent, let alone why. It should have taken the crew's cherry-picker to even reach the scaffolding.

Whoever it was, Galen was sure it must have been some determined idiot.

He approached the base of the tent. Galen and the climber were still separated by the entire height of the tent, but they were close enough for him to recognize the climber's long, black hair flowing in the breeze.

“Oh goddammit it's Tsuki,” Galen muttered.

“Hey Galen!” Tsukiko cried from above.

“What are you doing up there?!” Galen demanded. “And how – ”

“Check it out!” Tsukiko said gleefully. She let go of the scaffolding tower and bent her legs.

“No, don't – ”

It was too late. Tsukiko leapt off of the sign. She flew a surprising height before clearing the ten. Then, gravity remembered its place and she began to fall.

Galen's instincts took hold. It was clear where Tsukiko would impact the ground. He sprinted to that spot as fast as he could manage.

As he and Tsukiko both sped towards the point of impact, he heard Tsukiko scream something.

Galen stretched out his arms. He hadn't had time to think about whether or not this would help and, in hindsight, he would realize that it wouldn't.

One loud, painful crash later, Tsukiko and Galen were a collapsed heap.

For a moment, both were silent.

“Why did you catch me?” Tsukiko asked.

“What kind of question is that?”

“No, seriously. Why did you catch me?!” Tsukiko demanded, managing to get herself onto all fours. “You're no softer than the ground!”

“I had to do something,” Galen said, struggling to his feet. “Why did you jump?!”

“Because of this!” Tsukiko stood up fully, then tugged the bottom edge of her fiery pink sweater. “It's the Jumper!”

“It's ugly!”

“I know. But it lets me jump super high. And then not die when I hit the ground.”

“You could've told me that.”

“Believe me, if I knew you were going to try to Superman me, I would've!” Tsukiko rubbed her neck. “I think it only works properly if I land on my feet. And it doesn't protect you at all!”

“You don't say.” Galen muttered, rotating his wrists to ensure they still worked. While doing so, he took a long look at his left hand.

“Hey, Tsuki?” He asked.

“Yeah?”

“Does my pinkie look all right to you?”

Tsukiko looked at Galen's left pinkie. The finger itself looked fine. The angle it was sticking out of his hand did not.

Tsukiko let out a short terrified scream.

“Yeah that's what I thought,” Galen said. “It's just that it doesn't hurt, so I was – ”

Tsukiko released a second, completely identical, scream.

One of the two screams managed to attract Vercingetorix, who sauntered over from the far side of the tent. He looked at Tsukiko's pained expression, then to Galen's more stoic, confused expression. Finally, he noticed Galen's sideways finger.

“Well,” said the manager. “I think it's time to introduce you to the next Religalia. It heals injuries.”

Vercingetorix led Tsukiko, Galen and Galen's dislocated finger to a trailer, very similar to the one Tsukiko had began her day in.

It even had an identical insignia on the front – a stylized top hat and magic wand.

“This where you keep the Religalia?” Tsukiko asked.

“It is.”

“I was expecting something more... I dunno, magical,” Tsukiko said. “Like a wormhole to an alternate dimension where tanks and clothing are one and the same.”

“That is a very healthy imagination you have,” said Vercingetorix. “One moment.”

He stepped into the trailer, closing the door behind him.

“How's the finger?” Tsukiko asked Galen.

“Still sideways. And it still doesn't hurt.” Galen said. In curiosity, he poked it with the index finger of his other hand. In an instant, his face contorted in pain.

“That looked like a bad idea,” Tsukiko said, wincing.

“It was,” Galen said quietly. “It really was.”

In the moment Vercingetorix promised, he emerged from the trailer. He held a pair of red, sparkling shoes. Their hue and sheer size of the heel made Tsukiko think of something Stiletto the knife thrower would wear.

“These,” said Vercingetorix. “Are the High Heals.”

“Of course it's a pun. Sure. How do they work?” Tsukiko asked, taking the shoes. “Do I wear them, or does Galen?”

“You do.”

“Darn,” Tsukiko said, kicking off her current footwear. “The other way would have been way funnier.”

Galen gave her an annoyed look, no doubt exacerbated by the pain in his hand.

“Now, place your hands around Galen's injury like so.” Vercingetorix extended his index fingers and thumbs, tracing a diamond. “You can heal as big of a wound as you need to by spreading your hands further.”

“You should have shown me this one first!” Tsukiko said. She placed her hands as Vercingetorix showed her, ensuring that Galen's distorted pinkie was in the middle of her hand formation. “Now, I just need to believe that it will heal Galen, despite how impossible it seems?”

“You have to click the back of your heels together to activate it, but yes, that is what you must believe.”

Tsukiko closed her eyes and cleared her mind. She concentrated on her breathing, and nothing but the idea that Galen's finger would be repaired. Then, she clicked her heels.

She felt a slight shifting in her footwear, as she had with the Tank Top. She opened her eyes slightly to allow herself a brief glance at her feet. Wires emerged from the High Heals' lining. They slithered down around her ankle and conglomerated on the shoes' toe box. In seconds, each shoe had a shining silver cross on Tsukiko's toes.

“This is incredible,” Galen said. He watched in awe as his finger twisted back into place. In an instant, his finger was back to normal. He curled and extended it a few times, without any pain. “You need to tell hospitals about this!”

“We can't do that,” Vercingetorix said solemnly.

“Why not?” Tsukiko asked. “You can't just keep something like this locked up in a trailer!”

“No one knows how to make another set of High Heals,” Vercingetorix explained. “I'm sure you understand that dissecting a pair of shoes looking for some miracle cure would only risk damaging the Religalia.”

“Have you studied them at all?” Galen asked.

“Of course, but all we have learned are that they have some limitations.” Vercingetorix held up fingers as he listed, “Number one – they cannot cure diseases, even the mildest stomachache. Number two – they cannot heal injuries that are too old. We're not sure what the cutoff is, but it seems that injuries that the body has already begun to heal of its own accord are unaffected by the High Heals' power. Number three – they cannot replenish blood. They will fix the damaged tissue and prevent further blood loss, but someone who has lost too much blood already will still die. And, of course, number four – they cannot bring someone back from death.”

“The shoes are still pretty far above modern medicine,” Galen said, still enchanted by his working finger. “I still think you need to take them to a hospital.”

“And tell them what? That a circus has magic footwear that can mend broken bones?” Vercingetorix asked. “In the past, we did take the shoes around hospitals. Unfortunately, the surgeons thought we had planted fake injured victims as a publicity stunt. Quite a frustrating affair.”

Vercingetorix shook his head.

“You're welcome to try, whenever we're set up close enough to a hospital,” He said. “Just don't be late for your shows. Hospitals have doctors that can help patients without you, but we need you here for your magic shows.”

“Believe me, I won't be late,” Tsukiko promised. “In fact... I think I'm going to go get ready for the next show.”

She looked back at Galen.

“Come find me when you're done washing elephants or whatever!” She said cheerfully. Then she departed, bouncing dozens of feet into the air. After a few leaps across the field, she vanished completely out of sight.

Galen watched her depart, then sighed, staring at his finger.

“Is something troubling you, Galen?” Vercingetorix asked. “Your finger is back to normal, isn't it?”

“It's completely fine,” said Galen, wiggling it to make sure.

“Then what's the matter?”

Galen leaned against the banister of the trailer's stairs. He looked across the field, and in the distance, he saw a shape that looked distinctly like Tsukiko leaping a few dozen feet into the air.

“Tsukiko and I are partners,” Galen said. “She's said it before – that her magic shows wouldn't be as good without me. It really meant a lot to me to hear that.”

“Oh?”

“Do you ever feel jealous of the circus performers?” Galen asked. “Well, maybe jealous isn't the right word, but – ”

Vercingetorix nodded before Galen could even think of a way to reword his question.

“The performers are truly something special,” said Vercingetorix. “They do things that no one else can possibly comprehend. Myself and the crewmembers, we tend to sit on the sidelines and watch the magic. We are, to be blunt, ordinary people. However close we are to them, it can feel like we're worlds apart.”

“Yeah. I know what you mean,” Galen said. “But I wasn't always so far away, you know? Tsukiko and I were... eight, I think, when we met. Even then, she could do card tricks and sleight of hand. But I understood all of that. I only learned the tricks I needed to do, and even then I was never as good at them as she was, but it was always possible.”

Vercingetorix continued to nod.

“Now there are all these Religalia in the mix,” Galen continued. “And now she's jumping fifty feet in the air and healing my broken finger and...”

“And turning into a tank.”

“Especially turning into a tank! How's an ordinary person like me supposed to keep up?”

“Tell me, Galen,” said Vercingetorix. “Why did you decide to be Tsukiko's partner in magic? And why did she decide she wanted you over anyone else?”

Galen shook his head.

“I can't answer the second one. I mean, I don't get stage fright and we can bounce jokes off each other. Maybe that's all it is.”

“Well then, what about the first question? Why did you get into stage magic with Tsukiko?”

Galen paused. He had thought this would be the simpler question to answer, but he had to think back to each and every magic show he'd been a part of to find his answer.

“It's fun,” Galen said simply, a faint smile on his face. “I wouldn't have thought of doing it if it weren't for Tsukiko, but it really is fun. Tsukiko once tried to describe it as showing people impossible, amazing things, and letting them forget how boring reality is. I thought it was silly at the time she said that, but I guess that's really what we do.”

“And now she's doing what even you think is impossible.”

“Yeah. It's like I'm just an audience member now.”

“The thing is, Galen, the things Tsukiko does now are feel as impossible to her as they look to you. It's her conviction that makes it possible.”

“And the Religalia.”

“Well, here's a much simpler question,” said Vercingetorix. “Do you have the same conviction as Tsukiko? If you were to wear a Religalia, do you think you could make it respond to you?”

Galen turned to look at Vercingetorix, eyes wide.

“Are you asking what I think you're asking?”

Vercingetorix smiled.

“There are a couple Religalia left,” Vercingetorix said. “Two of them even have the dubious tradition of being worn by the magician's assistant as opposed to the magician herself.”

Galen paused.

“Why didn't you start off by telling me that?”

“I was curious,” Vercingetorix said with a shrug. “I wondered if your thoughts were the same as those of their previous owner.”

“Oh? Who was their previous owner?”

Vercingetorix scratched his chin. It was a contemplative reply when he said, “The man gave up his magician's assistant ways many years ago. And considering how he, like you, tended to give the fame to the magician herself, I think he may prefer to remain anonymous for the time being.”

“Doesn't sound exactly like me, then,” Galen said. With a grin, he added, “I told Tsuki I'd steal her show at some point.”

Vercingetorix laughed. “Let's see how well that translates into a conviction in the impossible, shall we?”

#dressed to kill #tsukiko #original fiction

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