Tumgik
#generally just having her be more calculative about her research with a clear goal in mind (prove he’s not like chloe) would’ve sufficed
jacquesthepigeon · 1 year
Note
Do you think the "Marinette couldn't confess to Adrien due to trauma" could have worked? How would you have written it?
I could’ve worked if planned out from the start by having her be cautious rather than enthusiastic around Adrien as she gets to learn more about him and also if she had difficulty getting with Luka bc of said trauma as well even if not as bad due to his lack of relationship with Chloé
19 notes · View notes
luckyspacerabbit · 3 years
Note
would you ever share the background you created for kai leng? i'd be so interested in hearing it!
Hehe, yes! Thank you for waiting anon. I wanted to really think this through and make sure I was working with all the possible details of his character.
Okay, so my goal with fleshing out Kai was not to excuse him as a villain or to necessarily redeem him, but to humanize him and hopefully incur sympathy because I find his depiction as a mysterious lackey boogeyman to be 🙄 one dimensional and playing on racist tropes like the yellow peril ✨ (also bioware making him predominantly chinese + a lil russian. extrapolate what u will lol)
So here is my background for Kai :) Lots of childhood headcanoning and then some general talk about his character/why I chose certain elements as I did (such as dumping that dumb phantom blade for butterfly swords AEORHIG)
Childhood: According to the wiki, Kai is Earthborn, and from his general heritage we can assume that he grew up in Northern China (omg that's where my ancestors are from). The most populous city there is Beijing, which, if there was a spaceport or alliance recruitment anywhere, it would be there.
I headcanon that he was born to a bit of an unsteady family, where it was likely there was estrangement and unsafe conditions between the mother and father that may have created a sense of helplessness and neglect from a young age.
In my canon, Dan Hyun's mom, Hannah Shepard was the head of an agricultural research facility on Trident, and was an old friend of Kai's mom (From University, possibly).
As conditions worsened throughout Kai's childhood, his mom decided to take a chance and flee with Kai (age 10 at the time) to Hannah Shepard's science facility on Trident (Sentinel Agricultural Research Facility), where she and Kai would stay for about two years as his mom worked to save enough money for their own place .
Since Dan Hyun was already being homeschooled, it was easy enough for Kai to join up alongside her.
Dan Hyun (12 at the time) was extremely happy to have a friend since life on the facility could be really lonely-- but with all these changes Kai was having a difficult time adjusting, especially when Dan Hyun felt put off by his competitive attitude. After so long feeling neglected and growing in a tumultuous home environment, he craved external validation: homeschool provided an avenue for that. They developed their own academic-based competitive rivalry that counted towards friendship, but grew distant when he moved out with his mom about two years later.
When Dan Hyun was 18 (Kai at 16), she managed to apply to an Alliance Research Training program and receive admission-- something that was considered highly prestigious, despite her parents' reluctance. Kai had already begun to build resentment towards her due to the way her parents treated her (very preciously, sheltered, and without exposing her to the difficult parts of life) in contrast with what he lacked in family and world kindness, creating a drive to supersede her and compete with her once again, if only to have tangible proof that just because he began in a lower place didn't mean he couldn't surpass the vision of success.
After this event, they would strike up a still somewhat friendly rivalry again that continued until Kai enlisted in the Alliance at the age of 18 (his attempts to join directly at 16 failed in my canon lol, but he sure tried )
Alliance Service:
Kai took the combat-driven route while Dan Hyun was receiving training for her eventual research establishment in Akuze, meaning that in their line of work, they never crossed paths-- Though they maintained occasional communication and met up here and there whenever Kai was back from his tours.
This is where I believe his decline truly began.
Some habits, like his desire for tangible proof of success and seeking external validation, manifested more heavily in this time. Collecting badges off of dead soldiers (To remember his skill first hand) is a notable one, but I speculate he relied heavily on the word of his commanding officers to counter his self-esteem. Titles were incredibly important because they were proof. When he began to feel a loss of control which led to emotional outbursts and breakdowns, he would fall back on these bits of evidence that he had done something, anything.
The weight and violence of service combined to break away his mental strength and conditioned him to that of a soldier.
Famously, he was discharged in 2186 after his N7 designation. In a bar fight on shore leave, he murdered a Krogan (OKAY. Listen. The wiki says "first-degree murder" but first degree requires premeditation and bar fight implies heat of the moment. So IDK I think the details around this one are a little fishy. He was on leave but he was a soldier, so ? he probably just had a weapon on him? Okay, I'm not excusing him but premeditation is a bit different from manslaughter so just something I've pondered. It separates intentional killers from accidental murders).
At this point, he is formally incarcerated and set to serve a twenty-year sentence.
Cerberus Contact:
The year is 2177, and Kai has lost everything he's ever worked for. His prestige is gone, he is at the worst place he has ever been, his mom won't talk to him, and he has no one. He had even stopped hearing from Dan Hyun, the only person he could have considered a friend once.
Through a small TV in the prison, he is able to hear about the attack on Akuze, and its one survivor: Alliance Scientist Dan Hyun Shepard. In the attack her biotic abilities (Which she had kept secret for many years) were revealed, prompting immediate recruitment into the N7 Program and a contract for ten years of service. This drove Kai into rock bottom-- while he had nothing, Dan Hyun was steadily on track to uprooting the only thing he had ever felt like he had accomplished.
This is when Cerberus intervened, promising him a home, freedom, belonging, and success.
So of course Kai agreed. Why wouldn't he? He had nothing left in his miserable life and there would never again be a place for him.
Cerberus Intervention:
It's my belief that Kai wasn't necessarily "alienphobic" in the beginning. Instead, I think The Illusive Man saw a very clear opportunity to recruit and nurture a broken man into a pawn of service. TIM is incredibly smart-- everyone who works for Cerberus is. He knew what Kai needed was validation, the promise of success held directly on the tip of his tongue to drive him into tenacity and action.
Organizations like Cerberus, even in real life, prey on people at weak points, fulfill their needs and drape their ideology on top like icing on a cake. That's not to say that Kai is completely innocent-- he ate the sweets and readily threw the world to the side in order to attain more-- but it does give some perspective.
Kai in Cerberus:
In ME2 we know there is some apprehension on Kai's part about the role Shepard will play. He is already starting to feel slighted from failures with Rasa and takes even the possibility of rejection from TIM extremely hard and with violent emotional outburst. This evidences how much TIM has whittled him away over the decade of service. Kai feels as though he owes everything to TIM, that TIM saw something in him-- failing him is disproving that and accepting what Kai has feared all along: that he truly is a worthless and incapable person.
Kai and Shepard:
Kai is best known for his direct antagonism towards Shepard in the events of ME3, directly killing their allies and potential love interests in a way that is extremely personal. Yes, it is part of the job, but at the same time, it's clear Shepard gets under his skin. It's because in the end, after all that setup, Shepard is the one person who can take it all away from him.
They can replace him as TIM's prodigy/ They can bring an end to the organization that gave him everything (From his cybernetic enhancements (uh indoctrination cough couch) ) to his purpose in life. Kai threw it all in with them because he didn't see another choice.
My Canon: The End
So how do things end for Kai in my canon?
As you're aware, you can unalive him, violently. But Dan Hyun is very emotional and due to their shared childhood, I like to believe that there was still a grand feeling of kinship between them, a recognition of the other due to shared insecurities. I don't think there was ever a time Dan Hyun looked at Kai and saw anything other than her slighted friend (which is very romanticized, but SHE is very romanticized), it was just about getting Kai to see that too.
She locked him down the best she could, yelled, cried, and beat the shit out of him, but ultimately, preserved his life. After the crucible had been fired and Thane (alive ofc) attended to, she sought to right things between her and Kai: whatever form that takes. Who knows if he'll ever be able to live comfortably in society again-- but at least here, he has the chance.
Random Tidbits:
Some notes! At his best, I like that Kai is portrayed as Loyal, Hard Working, Methodical, Clever, Tenacious, and Factual. I think sometimes he can be written off unfairly as wimpy or scared, but in truth, he's very sure of his abilities and able to calculate his chances extremely well. He's smarter than fandom gives him credit for.
He has an interesting conflict between arrogance based on title and humbleness. He knows he wants to be the best but he never airs it-- like when Rasa suggests that he wants to be the leader for Humanity but he grows quiet and says to just focus on where things are at right now.
His time as a soldier absolutely affected him in ways I think sharpened him to the killer he became. It instilled values that remained with him in Cerberus, such as when he berates Bates for abandoning his squad and calls him a traitor. Kai doesn't betray-- he's quite literally ride or die.
Also? The ninja sword is super dumb because Kai is Chinese and the swords and Phantom's themselves are designed to appear Japanese in aesthetic. Ninjas= Japanese, but China did have their own sect of Assassins which I believe gave birth to Wu Ching as a type of Martial Arts? Or was drawn from it hmm
To keep to accuracy, Kai would have trained more towards their martial art techniques which focuses on close combat and quick movements, as well as the use of dual blades called butterfly swords (You'd likely recognize them as a set of rogue daggers).
That's all for that meta! Phew. If anyone actually read to the end, hey wassup, hope you enjoyed, and take most of this with a grain of salt since it's my headcanons and background work :) Thank you again for reading!
58 notes · View notes
aquietwritingcorner · 3 years
Text
Writers Month Day 5: Secret Word Count: 4850 Author: aquietwritingcorner/realitybreakgirl Rating: T Characters: Riza Hawkeye, Roy Mustang, Jean Havoc, Heymans Breda, Vato Falman, Kain Fuery Warning: Talk of abuse, although mostly hinted at. We all know that’s tied into Riza’s tattoo. Summary: One night on their way to Ishval, Hawkeye’s tattoo is revealed to the team. The discovery and consequential fallout do not go over so well. Notes: This is heavily based off of a headcanon session I had with @canisfuria some time back. This or something very similar (and more polished) will eventually be part of a longer series of one-shots I have planned. AO3 || ff.net
 ______________________________________________________
 Secret
 Noise interrupted the otherwise peaceful, if hot, desert night. Out of the three tents, the one in the middle was suddenly rocking with commotion, breaking the unusual peace the night had previously brought. Of course, this meant that the occupants of the other tents were woken as well, the shouts and the sight of the tent shaking sending them rushing over to it.
Mustang arrived first, the tent he and Hawkeye shared a little bit closer. He pulled a glove on, eyes sweeping over the area, ready for action. He never had time to assess the situation, however, as Havoc emerged from the tent, a wild-eyed rage about him. Without warning, but with a bellow of rage, Jean Havoc locked eyes on him, and then decked Roy Mustang. The hit was audible, and the General went back hard, hitting the sandy soil with a painful sounding thump. Shouts of surprise went up all around, but Havoc seemed singularly focused as he took another step towards Mustang.
Falman, who had been coming towards the commotion as well, threw himself between Havoc and Mustang, trying his best to hold Havoc back. Fuery, who had come out with Falman, was already by Mustang’s side, helping him sit up, although he kept an eye on Falman and Havoc. Havoc’s rage hadn’t abated, and Falman was struggling.
Lost among the noise was the sound of a tent flap opening. Hawkeye emerged, quick and distressed eyes taking in the scene, even as she clutched a shirt that was clearly not her own around her. Breda, not saying a word, but with a deadly serious look on his face, stayed right next to her.
“What in the name of all the gods was that for, Havoc!” Mustang growled out, starting to stand. Fuery stayed by his side, still watching.
“I saw her back!” Havoc yelled out, still struggling against Falman, still obviously angry.
Mustang stared at him, shocked, before his gaze switched over to Riza.
“An accident, sir,” she said her voice deceptively steady. “The lamp caught my shirt on fire, and they pulled it off of me.”
Breda hadn’t moved from Hawkeye’s side, but his gaze was firmly fixed on Mustang. “You need to explain yourself, General.”
“Explain nothing!” Havoc spat out. “He needs to—”
“Havoc, enough!” Hawkeye snapped out. She stepped up, warning Breda off with a glance as he moved to stay beside her. She moved to stand in front of Havoc, who stopped trying to break Falman’s hold when she moved between him and Mustang. “I will not explain myself like this, nor will I do it while you attack the general.” She glanced back at Mustang and the two of them exchanged a look. “Come with us,” she said, her eyes hard and clearly not accepting any other option.
Mustang and Riza moved off and, after a moment, Havoc shook off Falman, and followed after them.
As the three moved off, Fuery and Falman stared after them, more than a little confused. Breda watched, his look calculating and guarded.
“What… what just happened here?” Falman finally asked, as the three of them watched the other three, who were only a short distance off, although mostly out of earshot.
Riza had planted herself between Mustang and Havoc, which looked to be the only reason that Havoc wasn’t punching Mustang again. Although the group at the tents couldn’t hear what was being said, they could clearly tell that there were raised voices. The conversation obviously wasn’t going well, if the wild gestures and threatening body language meant anything.
Finally, Breda spoke. “…if you had to choose between the general or Riza, who would you side with?”
Both Falman and Fuery snapped their heads towards Breda.
“…Sir?” Fuery asked, the confusion clear in his voice.
“’You heard me,” Breda said, sparing both of them a look.  “Who would you side with?”
Fuery’s brown crinkled in confusion. “They’re… They’re the same side,” he said.
“No, they aren’t,” Breda said. “They’re two different people with two different goals.”
Fuery and Falman exchanged a look.
“I don’t understand what you mean, sir,” Falman said.
Breda scoffed, and looked back at the three who were arguing. Havoc had put himself between Riza and Roy, as if he were protecting her. Breda’s jaw tightened. It was too late for that wasn’t it? He shook his head, and looked back over at the other two.
“She came in tonight. She never said why, just like the other times, but Hav welcomed her in all the same. She looked like she needed it. We moved things around to accommodate, but somewhere in there the lamp’s glass must have tipped up, and the flame caught her shirt on fire. I noticed it first, but Havoc was closer and acted. He pulled it off of her, but that was when we both saw it.”
He paused, his jaw working. Riza had worked her way back between Havoc and Roy, and was clearly angry. Neither Falman or Fuery said anything, waiting for Breda to continue.
“Her back,” he said. “From neck to waist and side to side, it’s covered in a large tattoo of Roy’s matrix.” He heard the sharp intake of breath from the other men but didn’t take his eyes off of the woman in question. “It’s also covered in three large burn scars. One is bigger than my hand, one about half that size, and another the size of my palm. They’re bad enough they destroyed the tattoo, and they’re old.”
There was a beat of silence, and then Falman let out a Drachman explicative. Fuery opened his mouth, only for a loud shout to take their attention back to the other three.
Hawkeye shoved Havoc back sharply, her voice rising up, loud enough to be heard.  “—DARE you determine what’s right or wrong in MY life! That’s for ME to decide and I have MADE my decisions!”
It looked as if Riza was about to fight Havoc on her own, if not for Mustang interfering. He said something that they couldn’t hear to her, and she held her place, although she was clearly angry. There were a few more exchanged words, and then, suddenly, they all split up. Mustang had his arm around Riza’s shoulders, and the two of them walked away together while Havoc turned and went in the opposite direction, heading back towards the camp.
Falman and Fuery said nothing as Havoc came closer, not sure what to say, but Breda simply asked “Hav?” without moving.
Havoc didn’t slow down as he passed them, hands balled up and shaking. “I’m going for a walk,” he ground out, stiff and angry.
Breda gave a nod, and like that, the argument was seemingly over, although absolutely nothing was resolved, and the tension remained.
By the time Havoc returned, an hour or two had passed, although no one was asleep.  He passed by Falman and Fuery, who were by the fire, talking in hushed voices. The light was still on in his and Breda’s tent, meaning the other man hadn’t gone to sleep yet. But more importantly to the blonde, there was still a lamp light on in Mustang and Hawkeye’s tent.
Havoc walked to it, stopping outside of it with an inaudible sigh and steeled his nerves. Now that he was calmer, he knew that he needed to get to the bottom of this. He knocked on the tent flap and waited. There was a pause of activity, and then Mustang’s voice called out.
“Come on in, Havoc.”
Havoc pushed the flap aside, ducking his head as he entered. Hawkeye and Mustang both stared up at him. She had been cleaning her guns, Havoc noted, and Mustang had been reading, and, apparently, icing his cheek, although where he had gotten ice from was anyone’s guess.
“I want to apologize,” Havoc said, and Mustang raised an eyebrow. “But let’s get something straight. I’m not apologizing for the punch—not yet.” He sat down in front of them, face serious. “I’m apologizing for acting without knowing all the information. I saw Riza’s back, and I jumped to conclusions. It an old flaw of mine, especially with people I care about. But until I know the whole story, I’m not apologizing for the punch.”
Hawkeye and Mustang exchanged looks.
“That’s fair,” Hawkeye said, although there was still something strained in her voice. Mustang sat up straighter, putting his book to the side while Hawkeye started nimbly reassembling her gun, and Havoc realized that Mustang was waiting on her to start the story.
“When I was young,” she said as her fingers worked. “My mother died. I have very little memory of her, but I knew that she loved me dearly. Her passing left my father and myself behind. Before mother passed, I know that Father loved me. Or, at least, he was fond of me. I have some memories of him playing with me. However, with mother’s death, his warmth also left. I suppose it was his way of coping, but Father threw himself into his research.” She put the last piece on her gun and looked up at Havoc. “He was an alchemist, you see.”
She took a breath but kept going. “From then on, Father was a cold, demanding, frightening man. He cared only for his studies and for finding someone to carry them on.” Her jaw tightened, and she looked away for a moment, before refocusing on Havoc. Mustang shifted the smallest bit closer to her. “He determined that I was not intelligent enough to continue them. I believe that any chance of regaining his affection died that day, although I didn’t realize it at the time.”
“After that, my role in his life was reduced to housekeeper, cook, maid, and occasional outlet for his anger. I was also expected to keep up with my own studies. As the years passed and the money ran out, I took on additional tasks, such as hunting, gardening, and anything else that needed to be done. He had little to do with me, and after learning what having his attention now meant, I preferred it that way. Father, meanwhile, took on apprentice after apprentice, only for each of them to leave. When I was nine, a new apprentice came.”
She glanced at Mustang, and a bit of a smile touched her lips. “It was a smarmy city boy who didn’t look like he’d last five minutes on his own in the countryside. To my surprise, he lasted much longer than that with my father. Eventually, we grew to be friends.”
Her smiled faded. “However, when Roy was eighteen, and I fourteen, he enlisted in the military. Father did not approve of the military and especially not of state alchemists. He refused to teach Roy anything further, kicked him out, and disavowed him. After that, Father threw himself into his research to the point that I was afraid he would die in the midst of it.”
She stopped, taking in a breath, and Mustang definitely slid closer to her. “When I was fifteen, he asked me for my help. He wanted to entrust me with the secrets of his flame alchemy. Despite everything, I still wanted my father’s affections, and I agreed. For a year he tattooed my back. At first, I thought it would gain me his love, but I soon realized that wasn’t the case. All he cared for was his research. I tried to protest, but he wouldn’t hear of it. I had no choice but to comply. I was sixteen when he finished. The next year, he died.”
She looked at Mustang. “Roy had come back after graduating, trying to see if he could convince father to teach him the secrets of flame alchemy. He died while talking to Roy. Roy helped me bury him, and we talked. I determined that he truly could use flame alchemy for good, and so I showed him my back.”
Here, Mustang picked up the story. “I was… horrified… to see what Master Hawkeye had done. But at the same time, I was hungry for the knowledge. We talked it over more, and with her agreement, I spent nearly a year there, studying her back. Afterwards, I went to take the test and received my state alchemist title.”
“I decided to join the military as well,” Hawkeye said. “I wanted to help people, too. I wanted to protect our country.”
They looked at each other, and for a moment, they didn’t say anything.
“It didn’t turn out like we had planned.” Mustang finally said. “And we both blamed ourselves.” He reached over and took Hawkeye’s hand. “I found her, just before leaving, patting down the dirt on a grave.”
“It was an Ishvalan child,” Hawkeye said, looking down at their hands. “I couldn’t bare to leave him like that.”
“It was there she asked me to burn her back,” Mustang continued. “I wanted to refuse, but...”
“I was insistent,” Hawkeye picked back up. “There could be no more flame alchemists. I would not be responsible for that level of destruction again. I was the guardian of the secrets of flame alchemy. I would rather die or be defaced then let anyone else learn them.”
“We waited until we were both on furlough, and then… I did it,” Mustang said, his voice rough. “I only burned away the most important parts. I was afraid doing more would kill her. But I burned her, helped her through the worst of the recovery.”
Hawkeye looked back up at Havoc, her gaze steady, sure. “It was my choice,” she said. “It was my choice to have him burn me, and my choice to follow him after that. I could have quit then and there, but I chose to stay and fight for a future where no more Ishvals would happen again.” She paused, making sure she had his attention. “My choice, Havoc. My life. My decision.”
For a moment, Havoc was silent. Then, slowly, he nodded. “That’s… a lot to take in.” He was quiet for a few moments longer, processing all he had been told, and then he turned his attention to Mustang, his gaze still hard. “You worked with Berthold for years. You knew him almost as well as she did. And you didn’t do anything to save her?”
Mustang kept Havoc’s gaze for a moment, and then bowed his head. “That’s correct.”
“What are you talking about?” Hawkeye interrupted. “He made living with that man bearable!”
“But he still left you living with him,” Havoc shot back.
“Instead of doing what?” Hawkeye demanded. “Whisking me away on horseback? That man was a monster, but he was still my father!”
Havoc looked at her, and them, his expression unfathomable for a moment. He looked as if he wanted to argue the point, to say something more, but then he let out a sight. “Right,” he finally said, looking away. “It’s the past. There’s nothing to do about it.” He looked back at Roy. “Sorry for that right hook.”
Mustang let out a huff. “Yeah, well, don’t let it happen again.”
“Not unless you truly deserve it,” Havoc agreed.
He looked over at Hawkeye. “And sorry about… well, I’m not going to apologize for defending you or wanting to protect you, but sorry for not listening first.”
Hawkeye shook her head. “It’s alright,” she said.
With that, Havoc got up, bidding the both a good night. He exited the tent, but he wasn’t ready to settle down yet. He had too much to mull over, but he also didn’t feel like being alone, Looking around the camp, he could see that Breda was out of their tent, looking over something with Falman. But Fuery didn’t seem to be busy. Havoc approached him.
“Hey, Sarge. Wanna go for a walk?”
Fuery blinked up owlishly at him but gave a nod and stood. “Sounds good, sir,” he said.
Together they ambled away, towards the tree line. It was still dark out, and nothing much was said for the first few minutes of the walk. Havoc didn’t feel like talking, but he also didn’t want to be alone. Fuery walked beside him, patient enough for a bit.
Still, after a few minutes, the younger man gentled prodded him. “So, I saw you went to talk to the general and the captain.”
Havoc sighed, taking a long drag on his cigarette. “Yeah, I did.”
“Everything get settled?”
“Sort of.” There was a pause, and finally, Havoc spoke again. “It’s not my story to tell,” he said finally. “She’ll tell you when she’s ready. You two’ve gotten close since it all went down. Don’t worry about it, Sarge.”
Fuery made a noncommittal noise but didn’t push it any further. The two of them walked a little further, until finally heading back to camp. They weren’t far out when Fuery spoke again.
“…That was a cheap shot you got in earlier, though.”
“Yeah, I suppose so.”
There was a beat, and then. “It was pretty satisfying to watch.”
Havoc laughed at the unexpectedness of the comment. “Well, we’ve all wanted to get in a good swing at the general at least once!”
The levity helped, and when they got back to camp, Havoc was ready to go to bed. Fuery headed over to Falman, who was still by the fire, and Havoc headed towards his and Breda’s tent, taking a moment to glance at the tent of his COs, and glad to see the light out in it.
Breda was already in his sleeping bag, reading a book by the lamp light. He glanced up when Havoc came in but didn’t say anything. They both settled down to sleep, neither of them saying anything. Breda was falling into sleep, assuming Havoc was already there, when Havoc’s voice broke the quiet.
“It was her decision.”
Breda paused. “…The tattoo or the burns?”
“Not the tattoo. That was her father’s.”
Breda fell quiet at that, taking it in, not able to find something to say for a few minutes. Finally, he did.
“…that’s messed up.”
“…yeah.”
Neither of them said anything else that night, but Breda resolved to keep a closer eye on Riza from now on and make his own judgements about the situation. He had the basic information he needed for now. The rest would come in time.
The next day dawned far too early for any of them, and far too solemn. The whole team was subdued, and it escaped no one’s notice how Mustang and Hawkeye stuck closer together, and how Breda kept an eye on Hawkeye. By the time they stopped again for the night, everyone was exhausted. Camp was set up, a fire was made, and food was eaten. They moved around the camp after eating, each taking care of what they needed to.
Fuery was sitting next to the fire, tinkering with a radio when Hawkeye stopped in front of him. He looked up at her. She looked tired, exhausted, but as if she had come to a decision.
“Kain. Let’s go for a walk.”
“Sir?”
“You want to know, don’t you?”
Fuery rose to his feet and followed her out of the camp and into the nearby wilderness. No words were spoken at first, and Fuery didn’t push her. He could tell that she was on edge and low on patience. Finally, after a few minutes she spoke.
“What did they tell you?” she asked.
He hesitated. “…that you have a very large tattoo on your back. That’s it’s the general’s matrix. And that there are large burns on it.”
She nodded, not saying anything. Finally, after a moment, she spoke, her voice very detached, clinical, and matter-of-fact.
“My father was an alchemist. His life’s work was studying flame alchemy. He and I lived alone from the time I was four until I was nine. He… was a frightening man. Nothing mattered to him, except for alchemy. When I was nine, the general came to apprentice under my father. He was thirteen. He lived with us until he was eighteen and joined the military. My father didn’t approve of the military and refused to teach him flame alchemy. A year after he left, my father decided to hide his research by tattooing it on my back. It wasn’t long after, that he died. Roy came back and helped me bury him, and I decided that I would show him my father’s research. Unfortunately, it was not used the way that either of us intended. At the end of Ishval, I asked Roy to burn it off of my back. He agreed and burned the most important parts off. After I healed, I made the choice to join him on this path.”
Fuery didn’t say a word as he listened, just taking it all it. The silence stretched between them, and Fuery could tell that she was waiting for him to have questions. He did have questions, but he also didn’t want to push her too far. Finally, after a moment, he asked one.
“I didn’t, um… I haven’t seen it—a-and you don’t have to show me! But Breda said it was big…” He wasn’t sure how to phrase his question.
“Yes,” she replied, in that same detached, exhausted voice. “It covers my back. It holds a lot of information that only a trained alchemist could read.”
There was a moment of silence again as Fuery paused.
“…how long did it take to do?”
“About a year, done in differing sessions with time to heal between.”
“Did it hurt?”
“Yes.”
The quiet stretched out between them again, and Fuery looked down.
“…did you have a choice?”
This time, the silence came from Hawkeye. “…he asked me, and I said yes. But I didn’t know what I was agreeing to. And by the time I figured it out, it was too late.”
Fuery didn’t say anything, just nodded in understanding. And then, he looked up at her, making eye contact, and searching her eyes. His brows tented back with a wry, half frown.
“…Does it still hurt, or is it numb now?”
Something in her breath caught, and several different things passed through her eyes. Finally, she simply said “…it depends on the day.”
Fuery nodded taking that in. “Thank you.”
Another moment of silence stretched, before Hawkeye sighed. “Let’s head back.”
“Yessir.”
Hawkeye’s tiredness wasn’t hard to see, and by the time they got back to camp, all she wanted to do was sit down. Instead, she headed towards the dishes, knowing it was her turn to take care of them. Fuery headed off to the campfire. Falman was in his tent. Before she could reach the dishes, though, Breda cut her off.
“Already taken care of, sir,” he said. “Felt restless.”
Hawkeye paused, as if assessing him. “…Thank you,” she finally said and, after a moment, she headed off towards her and Mustang’s tent.
He was in there, looking over his journal, and he looked up when she came in. Hayate looked up as well, tail wagging, and moving closer to her. She looked at them, and then at her sleeping bag. Without a word, she reached down and moved it closer, collapsing down on it. Mustang watched her do it, and shifted just a little bit closer. Hawkeye laid there, Hayate cuddling up with her, and buried her face in his fur.
For a while, the silence stretched on. Finally, Mustang spoke.
“Falman came to me while you were gone.”
She didn’t say anything.
“He wanted to know about your back.”
“…what did you tell him?”
“That your father was my Master, that he was a cruel man, that after I joined the military he tattooed your back, and that after he died you showed it me. I told him that after Ishval you asked me to burn the tattoo off of you, and I did.”
She was quiet. “…what did he say?”
“He was silent for a few moments, then nodded, thanked me, and left.”
Riza hummed.
Mustang was quiet for a moment as well. “…what did you tell Fuery?”
“…about the same.”
“And what did he say?”
She paused. “…he asked me if it hurt.” A beat. “He asked me if it still hurts.”
Roy didn’t say anything. Instead, he sighed, set his journal aside, and laid down next to her. He slipped an arm around her, and for a bit they laid in silence.
“…Hawkeye… I have something I’ve wanted to ask you… And I don’t mean it in any offensive way—”
“No, I don’t blame you for what happened to me as a child. You couldn’t have done anything to change it.”
“I could have stopped him from—”
“I wouldn’t have let you.”
Mustang let out a sigh, but said nothing more on the subject. Instead, the three of them just cuddled, until they finally went to sleep.
The fire was still burning, and Breda and Fuery sat by the fire. Breda was using the light to read by, and Fuery had things to tinker with. The silence, though, stretched on, and Fuery’s items went untouched, the young man taking his gun apart instead. The only sounds were that, and the crackling of the fire. After a moment, though, Breda realized that the sounds of metal tinging had stopped, and he looked up.
Fuery was staring into the fire, his gun in pieces on his lap. It wasn’t too unusual to find Fuery staring off into the distance every so often, but something about this struck a chord of concern in Breda. Very softly, he called “Sarge…?”
Fuery didn’t look at him, but shook his head minutely, murmuring under his breath. “It was her father.”
Silence descended over both of them, stretching on until Breda finally sighed, closed his book, and stood. He passed Fuery, tousling his hair a bit.
“Get some sleep, Fuery. Morning comes sooner than you think.”
Fuery gave a noise of acknowledgement but didn’t move. It wasn’t until several hours later that he finally put his gun back together and went to lay down, even though he was certain that he would not get any sleep.
The next day, again, dawned with tension. Hawkeye seemed to be waiting for something, although no one could quite put their finger on what. It lasted through the morning, stretching into the day, until finally Breda took the opportunity to approach both Hawkeye and Mustang as they were traveling.
“Boss. Hawkeye,” he greeted.
“Breda,” Mustang said back, side-eyeing him. “Is there a problem?”
Breda looked at Hawkeye. “You tell me, sirs.” He said. Hawkeye said nothing, but she did glance at him. Breda held his silence, and finally she sighed.
“What do you mean?” she asked him, tiredness in her voice.
“You’ve been on edge since the other night,” he said. “I get it when it happened, and when none of us knew. But we all know now. We’ve all heard the basics of the story. So why are you still on edge?”
For a moment, Hawkeye didn’t say anything. “Because,” she said, tightness in her voice. “You know. You all know. And the last thing I want is for that to change what you think of me. I don’t want pity from any of you, or to think that I need extra protection. I’ve fought for your respect, and I want to keep it.”
“What?” Breda looked at her, a bit of confusion on his face. “Why would we pity you? This gives you more respect from me,” he said. “There’s not a lot of people who could do what you’ve done.”
She looked at him askance. “…Maybe that’s how you feel, but what about the others.”
Breda snorted. “You’re joking, right? All of us are impressed by you. We’re in shock, of course, and we care about you, so we’re protective, but all of us would follow you into battle in a heartbeat. You’ve not lost any respect. You’ve gained, if anything.”
Mustang shot her a wane smile. “You see?” he said. “I told you that you’ve not lost their respect.”
Hawkeye glanced between the two of them, and then up at the others, and hummed thoughtfully.
When evening came that night, and food was passed out and eaten, instead of heading back to her tent, Riza stayed out around the campfire with the men. Falman played with Fuery’s radio, trying to find something to listen to, while Breda and Roy argued over the finer points chess strategy. At some point, Fuery bumped her elbow and handed her a cup of coffee, which she took, returning his smile. Somehow she ended up settled into Havoc’s side, his arm draped across her shoulders, and she let it be. As she sat there, surrounded by her friends, she realized that Breda had been right. None of them were treating her differently. None of them were giving her pity. She still had their respect. With that thought tipping her lips ups, she settled back, and looked at the stars.
19 notes · View notes
anonthenullifier · 3 years
Note
How would Wanda and Vision (and Billy) react to Tommy being taken by that mutant experimentation facility that wanted to turn him into a weapon?
When I saw this, the entire story immediately formed in my head and I had to write it. Thank you for the ask, I had a lot of fun doing it! I hope you enjoy :D.  
Warning: story has some strong language 
------
It took an enormous amount of convincing for them (Vision in particular) to agree to leave the boys alone for the weekend. There were many hours of whining and conversations about how they are sixteen now and how they need to be treated as adults. Surprisingly, it was Tommy who flipped the narrative by presenting them thoroughly researched details of their current private island get-away. In the back of his mind, Vision knows he should be more than just mildly worried about what antics they are getting up to and if they are remembering to eat and sleep, except that would mean ignoring the murmur of the ocean and the wistful smirk on his wife’s face and the way her curls sway in the salty breeze and the adorable wrinkles that have formed by her closing her eyes to fully enjoy the soft caress of their freedom. Though he can efficiently consider all of this at once, he would rather take Wanda’s near constant advice to live in the moment. So he does, scooping up her hand and bringing it to his lips. “Would you care for more sangria?” 
Wanda pops open her left eye to look at him. “That depends.” 
“On?” 
“Whether you deliver it in your speedo.”  
Vision contemplates the request, not in a serious manner, but in a theatrical show of potential uncertainty despite both of them being aware there is no physical way for him to resist the insatiability sending scarlet flares across her iris. “At the Maximoff resort,” her eyebrows perk up at the lathering of poshness and the implication of the direction of their evening, “we do pride ourselves on catering,” a shrug of his shoulders dissolves his prior floral shirt and Bermuda shorts into the little teal number from their honeymoon so many years ago, “to our guest’s every need.” 
“That’s good because I,” before he can grab her glass, Wanda fishes out one of the inebriated peaches, sliding it into her mouth with a saucy wink, “have lots of needs.” 
“I will return momen-” the thought hangs limply in the air as he watches Wanda freeze, her back straightening out and hands gripping the armrest of her beach chair as her lust cracks and gives way to a distant stare. Whatever she sees is not on this beach, may not even be in this universe. “Wanda?” Each passing moment crawls up Vision’s spine, prickling his skin and sending his mind into a whirlwind of unease at his ignorance of the issue. After what feels like five minutes but is actually ten seconds, Vision kneels in the sand beside her chair, haltingly bringing his hand to hers, “Wanda what is it?” 
“Tommy.” 
All joy leeches immediately from his mind, replaced only by a frigid shroud of concern. “What’s wrong?” 
To the untrained ear, the whirring and sputter to Vision’s left would be no different from the tropical breeze dancing around them, but Vision’s auditory system is functioning perfectly so he turns expectedly towards the blue portal of their son. “Mom,” Billy rushes through and the fact he’s barefooted and wearing sweatpants with a pajama shirt only unsettles Vision further, “Dad. They took Tommy.” 
Wanda’s head snaps to the side to stare in the general direction of their son, her eyes still miles away despite her voice trembling with rage in the present, “Who?” 
“I don’t, I don’t know.” Nervously he brushes a hand through his hair, “He went out for a run and then I felt,” Billy’s eyes are wild, tinged with blue, much like Wanda’s own get when she struggles with overwhelming emotions, “we were connected, you know, like you say we should be and-” 
Vision has known anger in his own life, whether it is in the way he never hesitates to decimate those who harm Wanda, or in the calculated attacks of logic he uses on politicians and other officials who are being discriminatory and lecherous, or even in the calm, but firm words he uses to discipline the boys, but this feeling now, this dropping of his stomach and the roiling, severe heat that flows through his synthetic veins and the complete and utter single ideation of causing pain to whomever did this...this is new. “Can you track him still?” 
Pinched eyes, a shaky nod, and a prismatic cloud confirms the question. Not wanting to pressure their son more than he, no doubt, is already doing to himself, Vision directs his attention to Wanda, recognizing the same fury in the serious scowl on her face and he does a less than admirable job of remaining calm when he assures her, “We will get him back.” 
 “I think…” Billy’s neck cranes to the right as if he’s trying to peer around a corner, “I found him.” 
The strain in his voice kick starts Wanda out of her seething and into action, “Let me help.” Scarlet twines its way through Billy’s electric blue seeing glass, seeming to clarify the situation even if Vision stands helplessly blind next to them. “Vizh,” he snaps to attention, taking in every piece of information and constructing a mental diagram of the situation, “there’re six armed guards,” Vision’s fingers curl into a tight fist at the number, “two holding him, two flanking those, and two in the back near the door.” The people are added to his schematic. “It’s a small room.” 
“Looks like an operating room.” 
Billy’s addition is helpful and causes Vision’s body to become denser, his feet burying in the sand as his mind churns through the tactical options instead of getting mired in what might befall Tommy if they do not hurry. “Billy, you are going to portal us there. Let your mother and I eradicate the targets.” 
Only the surprised warning in Wanda’s, “Vision” alerts him to his harsh vocabulary. 
“I mean we will subdue and neutralize the targets.”  
Billy doesn’t care about the terminology, still focused on his connection to his twin. “What should I do?” 
It is tempting to tell him to remain here, safe on the beach, but if all Vision feels is a need for retribution, he imagines Billy’s own feelings are similar and being sidelined will only increase his worry. “You get your brother.” With a hand on each of their shoulders, Vision draws them in for a pre-fight huddle. “The most important thing is to get Tommy back safely.” Synchronized nods confirm the obvious goal. “The second most important outcome is that we make these individuals rue the day they decided to target the Maximoff family.” Battle ready smiles meet his words, all of them ready to tear the world apart if that’s what it comes down to. “Let’s get your brother.”
 -------------------------------------- 
 Tommy is pissed. For one thing, mom and dad are never going to trust them alone again and that’s utter crap because it’s not his fault some shady ass organization was apparently creeping on him and waiting for him to be alone. He was even following dad’s stupid running route of highest visibility to cars and he was wearing the even more idiotic reflective vest because he was damned if he ruined their earned freedom. It is going to be so vindicating to inform dad that the vest gave his position away.   
Another point of annoyance is that these assholes used some sort of electrified net to catch him and it hurt like hell and they somehow have restraints that can withstand his powers. This was clearly well planned and that is a little flattering but mainly it’s infuriating. “Do you assholes know who I am?” Of course they do, but clearly they haven’t much thought through what kidnapping him would mean for their own well-being.  
The guard to his right doesn’t directly acknowledge the comment, instead asking her superior, “Can we please gag him?” 
Good, he’s glad his charming banter is annoying them. “You all are so fucked once they get here.” 
The superior also pretends like he’s not talking. “Get him on the table and sedate him.” Great. “He won’t remember anything once we’re done.” Not ominous at all.  
“Do you have to get training for how to be a villain?” He’d really, desperately like to speed away now, but not even vibrating his molecules is working on these shackles, so he needs to take the Stark approved quippy distraction strategy. “Because the delivery of the threat was a bit halfhearted. I’m not even scared.” A lie but they don’t know that (hopefully).  
The two guards gripping his arms drag him to the middle of the room where there’s the stereotypical solitary operating table with leather straps and a blinding fluorescent light above it (does someone make their living doing interior decorating for bad guys? If they do, they suck at it because this is drab and uninspired). Tommy resists as best he can, flopping his body in the opposite direction of their tugging all while sending out a mental SOS. Truthfully he doesn’t really understand Billy or mom’s telepathy, he just knows one of them always shows up eventually when he thinks about wanting company. And he really wants them here right now.  
A taser is rammed into his back and he crumples forward with an irate, “Assholes.”  
Almost giddily they strap him onto the table, the leader grinning down at him through the military grade face shield. “Halfhearted or not, you’re ours now.” 
“What does that even mean?” The man moves away without even the decency to shrug, radioing to someone that the subject is subdued and ready for the procedure which Tommy is most certainly not ready for whatever they plan to do and so he squeezes his eyes shut and sends out a very, he thinks, clear cry for help.  
When he receives an answer in the form of a thought dropped deep into his brain, one that says  We’re almost there , Tommy knows he should play it cool, bemoan the fate he is about to befall and rub the egos of the sadistic bastards around him, but he can’t help himself, turning to the guard tightening the strap across his chest, “You are fucked.” He turns his head towards the other guard, “You’re fucked too.” And then he just channels Oprah herself and spreads it to everyone. “And you’re fucked, and you’re fucked, and you’re fucked.” A shimmering portal opens up on the far wall right next to one of the door guards, to whom he shouts, “And you are most definitely fucked.” Before the promise is fully out the guard is pulled through the portal with a strangled scream, the wall closing up milliseconds before the others in the room turn towards the noise.  
Mr. You’re Ours Now glares at Tommy and then instructs the rest of the room. “Orders are shoot to kill, do you copy?”  
“Affirmative,” answers the guard next to him.  
That’s how this is going to go? Well then a very sarcastic, “Good luck” to them.  
Luck is not on their side because another portal opens and the second door guard is pulled through, dad phasing through the man’s body and solidifying just in time to punch another guard so hard it shatters their visor. Shit.  
The room erupts in chaos, a scarlet mist descending around them, the guards try to shoot but their guns are ripped out of their hands. And then there’s dad’s vibranium gleaming as he phases in and out of mom’s carefully crafted cover, the frantic and pained screams of the guards echoing as they fall, and this, this is how you do drama because if Tommy wasn’t the one being rescued, he’d be praying to whatever god might take mercy on his soul. “You okay?” Billy’s voice cracks with concern which is just really sweet.  
“Took you long enough.” 
And the concern is gone, “I was doing the responsible thing and getting backup.” 
He should be gracious right now because he is actually thankful but, “I don’t think you can call it backup when they’re the ones doing all the work.” 
There’s the steely gaze Billy’s perfected, “Do you want to be rescued or not?” 
“Thomas,” dad hovers beside him now, the transformation of his terrifying rage into fatherly concern contorting his features into a mildly upsetting scowl. “Are you injured?”  
It’s not often he’s the absolute center of attention and if he were to lay it on a bit thick it would be wholly understandable because he was the one who was rudely kidnapped, but he also has never seen his family this worried before so he defers to downplaying the experience. “Just a bit sore,” while also being truthful, “They electrocuted me a few times.” 
Finally, someone removes the straps and then dad breaks the constraints around his ankles, allowing him to blissfully stretch and shake out his muscles. Billy helps him sit up and the sight he’s met with is unexpected. “Why are you in a speedo?” To be fair, mom is in a beach cover and Billy’s in pajamas, but at least they’re clothed.  
“Um,” it seems the choice of clothing skipped dad’s mind, his hands running haltingly over his bare chest, “it was a tactical choice meant to bewilder and divert attention.” 
Scary, rage filled dad is gone and replaced with the normal, dry humored and dorky one, a fact that comforts Tommy far more than he’d ever admit out loud. “Sam’s never taught us about the tactical speedo.” 
Dad’s shoulders rise up a half inch and then fall with grace, “It is an advanced skill meant only for the most stalwart of Avengers.”
Which would be more believable (still not close to it, but marginally more so) if he didn’t instantly morph into his uniform when the door opened and the rest of the Avengers came inside, dressed and ready for battle. 
Mom directs them, “Vision has downloaded the schematics and files and will share them with you.” A chorus of chimes indicates the message has been delivered. “If you don’t mind,” mom wraps her arm around Tommy’s shoulder, easing him off the bed and helping steady him with her powers, “we’re going to leave the rest to you all.” 
Sam’s, “We got it covered,” absolves them of any responsibility in taking down the rest of whatever shady organization this is.
Even though Tommy would love to be part of an actual Avenger’s mission, he’s okay with sitting this one out…for the most part because as they walk towards Billy’s portal, Tommy shimmies free of his family’s helping hands long enough to stare smugly down at the broken nose of the leader of the assholes, “Told you you were fucked.” And then they leave, certain that the message was loudly received: no one messes with the Maximoffs.  
31 notes · View notes
erbferbatinlerb · 4 years
Text
sorry for the long post, i'm on mobile and cant put a read more but.... drumroll please.... due to popular demand here it is! Phineas Has ADHD: The Essay.
Hyperfixation on building/inventing things: Even more specifically amusement park rides ("Rollercoaster", "Rollercoaster The Musical", "One Good Scare", "Leave The Busting To Us", "Don't Even Blink", "Cheer Up Candace", "Delivery Of Destiny", etc.) Now, you can argue that he's a kid, and rides are fun, so of course he likes them, but if you look at it from a building standpoint, from an engineering standpoint? Phineas' interest lies in fun, of course, but he also must have an extreme interest in the engineering aspect of a ride in order to be skilled and knowledgeable enough to build them, and to be able to focus on the task so wholly.
He also gets incredibly attached to very specific things that some people often find strange, which seems like evidence of hyperfixation to me. (E.g.: aglets in "Tip of the Day", dental hygiene in "Bully Bust", Bulgarian folk dancing in "The Beak", detective movies in "Finding Mary McGuffin") hot tubs in "Bully Bromance Breakup", "Lotsa Latkes", "Swiss Family Phineas")
HYPERFOCUS: He and Ferb will dedicate their whole day to just one idea that they have. Phineas is able to weaponize his hyperfocusing talent incredibly well and stick to one task, but only if it is something he is extremely interested in — for example: In "Bully Bromance Breakup", he becomes almost unable to function without the stimulation of inventing, to the point where climbing a mountain with his friends—something he, by all accounts, should enjoy—becomes a difficult task for him.
He displays forgetfulness: In "Mom's Birthday", Phineas forgets it is his mom's birthday until he hears Candace mention it, and then he feels extremely guilty. We then see a montage of him, during various situations from the previous episodes (on the rollercoaster, etc.) telling Ferb: "We can't forget mom's birthday." Even though this was of course, a bit, if you take this as being canon (which there's no real reason not to), it means Phineas was constantly talking about their mom's birthday for weeks leading up to the event because he really didn't want to forget it and he was worried that he would (and in the end, he did), implying he may have a consistent tendency to be forgetful.
Phineas has an intense love of summer, and is implied to have a dislike for school—  which is natural for any kid his age, but it's not hard to imagine that he might feel cooped up and creatively stifled during school. Especially if we put his attitude towards school next to that of Baljeet, with whom he shares a love of learning and knowledge, it's hard to ignore the difference. Being as we've seen Phineas get agitated when he's not able to build and invent freely and on his own terms ("Bully Bromance Breakup", "Summer Belongs To You"), it's easy to imagine he may struggle in a public school environment.
He has impulsive and thrill-seeking tendencies, which are evident in many of the big ideas. ("Escape From Phineas Tower", "Rollercoaster", "Ain't No Kiddie Ride", "The Beak", "One Good Scare", "Phineas and Ferb-Busters", "Leave The Busting To Us", ETC.) Adrenaline-seeking behaviour is common in individuals with ADHD and goes hand-in-hand with a low tolerance for boredom which Phineas explicitly states himself to possess in the very first episode of the show. ("Rollercoaster")
However, on the flip side to his aversion to boredom, he can also spend literally hours just standing in the backyard, not even talking, if that's just what he feels like doing that day. ("Best Lazy Day Ever")
He is highly energetic and is the most talkative one of his friends. He has also suggested having an awareness and perhaps an insecurity that he talks too much in some situations. ("Misperceived Monotreme")
He sometimes has trouble with listening, and interrupts people, especially when he's excited: in "Ready For The Bettys", when they stumble upon Perry's lair, Phineas assumes Ferb built everything and doesn't listen, constantly interrupting when Ferb tries to protest; in "Hail Doofania", he assumes that he knows what Isabella is talking about (not having seen a rainbow before) and makes it his mission for the day to do what he thinks she means, and doesn't take the time to hear her out when she tries to explain otherwise because he's too invested in/excited about the project he has in mind.
Obliviousness / missing of social cues: The most obvious example is Isabella's crush on him, which he consistently fails to notice. ("Chronicles of Meap", "Meapless in Seattle", "That Sinking Feeling", "Happy New Year", "Summer Belongs To You", "Happy Birthday Isabella", "Doofapus", "It's No Picnic") He also seems not to understand that Candace wants to get them in trouble, nor that he actually probably would get in trouble if his mom knew what he and Ferb were doing. In fact, he gets excited about sharing their endeavors with Linda, clearly oblivious to the potential repercussions. ("Traffic Cam Caper", "What'd I Miss", "Suddenly Suzy")
Highlighted Episodic Evidence
Chronicles of Meap/Meapless in Seattle
Phineas's dismissal of Isabella's "cuteness" comments shows again his difficulty picking up on social cues, especially when distracted by a mission. He does not seem to understand, or at least does not acknowledge, Isabella's clear frustration with him. He does not understand that he is dismissing Isabella's feelings, because to him it feels obvious that she is cute and he doesn't think he needs to say it. Followed up in "Meapless in Seattle" with the "You think I'm cute?" "It's a scientific fact!" interaction—Phineas is not understanding that this isn't really how to give a compliment; he does not seem to realize that by not acknowledging Isabella's cuteness he could be hurting her feelings/nurturing her insecurities.
That Sinking Feeling
Once again, he misses cues from Isabella about her feelings for him, or if he understands them, he does not outwardly acknowledge them. He also tries to create romance for Mishti and Baljeet by taking "scientifically" romantic things, based upon his research (mostly the movie Titanic): candles, live music, the situation of a sinking ship... He over-does these things in a calculated way to try and curate the most scientifically romantic situation possible. This also mirrors Candace's opinion about his cold, calculated methods in "Perry Lays an Egg".
Cheer Up Candace
Phineas cares about Candace and when he sees her upset, he wants to help her, and he makes it his goal to do so. He hears the first step from Isabella's magazine is a makeover and he immediately thinks of a clown. He sets off to execute his plan without consulting anyone (except Ferb) and after it goes, as you can expect, not well, he realizes in hindsight that his impulsive idea was built on flawed logic. However, rather than dwell on this, he decides to dive right into the next step and he continues to do wildly over the top, fantastical versions of the magazine suggestions. I think this demonstrates a lack of understanding for social cues as well as impulsivity and impatience. Furthermore, he doesn't even wait to hear step two before setting out to achieve step one, and he doesn't ask Isabella her opinion or even listen to her suggestions once he has entered his own Idea Zone. Also, the Mix 'n' Mingle Machine is a great example of his unconventional and greatly efficiency-focused thought processes—  
he thinks of it as the most efficient way to meet as many people as possible in a short time, demonstrating a clear misunderstanding of what the actual intent of "meeting someone" was in the magazine. He is also basing this idea on his personal notions of what he finds fun, not what Candace would necessarily want.
Summer Belongs To You
When stranded on the island, Phineas shows an intense frustration when he's unable to put an optimistic spin on things. He also has a clear discomfort when he is without any tools to build with. Again, we see his hyperfocus on inventing (in this case: fixing the plane) get in the way of Isabella trying to have a romantic moment with him, and in the way of relaxing in general. She sees the sights of Paris, alone time with him, and chances to enjoy themselves, whereas Phineas sees things he could use as airplane parts, single-mindedly focused on his mission. And again he misses or does not acknowledge Isabella's frustration with him in the "It seemed like romance was a foregone conclusion" scene. This is strong evidence for Phineas' hyperfixation because he gets so caught up in his own world when it comes to inventing/building/working that he doesn't even notice what's going on around him, then he fails to see the irony of him identifying Candace&Jeremy and Ferb&Vanessa as romantic interests while entirely missing the fact that Isabella & him are also "a boy and a girl, alone in the city of love."
Also of note is his complete focus on completing the Summer Solstice goal. Because, despite the fact that they made it back to Danville safely after being in a pretty perilous situation—which should have become their main concern being as they were just stranded on an island with no food or way to call for help—he cannot be satisfied with that. Needing to get home before the sun sets for the sake of winning his bet and symbolically representing his worldview, he yells at candace when she doesn't want to get on the trike, because he's determined to still get there on time, intensely focused on both proving a point and upholding his personal values.
Happy Birthday Isabella
Isabella does not want an over-the-top surprise party, all she wants is to spend time alone with Phineas, but Phineas is so focused on his idea of her perfect birthday party that he does not seem to realize what her wishes are. He sends her away from him so that she won't know about the surprise, and does not even do so very gently (getting Buford to carry her away in a sack) instead of even asking her what she wants.
Bully Bromance Breakup
In this episode, Phineas is shown to get extremely distressed when he has to go even a short period of time without building/inventing anything. This is representative of a need for constant stimulation (which would explain why he is so adamant that he cannot put up with boredom). This also evidences his hyperfixation on building/inventing. The whole time that they're climbing the mountain with Baljeet, Phineas is completely preoccupied by his ideas for inventions, and after Baljeet rejects his ideas a few times, he gets increasingly agitated, eventually gets to a point where he is unable to climb anymore and has to get pulled up by the others, and he is shown rambling to himself about all of the invention ideas he has.
This is by no means a definitive list, and I'm sure there are many more moments in the show that provide evidence of these ideas, but this is the ones that stood out to me. Anyway, in conclusion, Phineas has ADHD. If you're still reading this incredibly long post by this point: uhh, thank you, I guess! Have a nice day. 💖
274 notes · View notes
Text
Do You Have the Time? Episode 017: Under Pressure
Synopsis: While Leopold and Leslie work to ease their newfound professional discomfort, Jeremy has the unique opportunity to experience both professional and personal discomfort.
--
[From: [email protected]] [Received: 9:54 (1 hour ago)] [Subject: CVU Research Symposium]
Hi all,
I’d like to address the rumors that have been circulating in our building for the past few weeks. After a lot of deliberation with my peers in the CVU Board of Research, it has been decided that our yearly conference – which is often hosted here in Curiesville – will be relocated this year. Proposed by B.S. Dexter Hyde and Dr. Blythe Moreno of the CRISPR-Cas-9 molecular biology lab, we will be hosting our research symposium in San Diego California this year at the San Diego Convention Center. This change in venue was made in hopes of generating more interest in us as a research-driven university. The goal is to expand on the population that will attend the conference for better name recognition and to open us up to more potential sources for grant money. To be economically sound, we are combining our conference with the interests of numerous other universities in California that will also be presenting at the symposium. Thus, the symposium will not only last one day as it has in the past.
The symposium will start on Friday, August 17th at 9:00am, and will officially end on Sunday, August 19th at 5:00pm. Presentations will end each day at 5:00pm. We are currently working to have a portion of the Mission Beach reserved in the evenings for the participants to relax, network with one another other, and discuss research in a casual environment along with some fun activities.
As for transportation, there are a few options. Most of you who planned on participating anyway will likely be able to afford your own airline tickets with the grant money that you already have. If you are short, then you may apply for the numerous grants that will become available to the university over the upcoming months. I will send a separate email listing the institutions that are likely to be the most helpful.
Lastly, if the grants do not work out, then your lab may write a proposal that explains your research topic, how it is beneficial, and why it is important for you to present at the symposium. Send these proposals to Dexter Hyde, and he will review them. Calculate your projected expenses for your trip, and the Board of Research will cover up to half of your expected costs if your proposal is sufficient.
In order to participate in the symposium, your lab must email your abstracts to me by June 15th. Your completed papers should be submitted by July 30th along with an appropriate slideshow presentation.
If you plan to participate, then please email your general topic and a list of all the members of your lab that will be involved in the presentation to me by the end of this week at 5:00pm. I will be able to keep track of everything much more efficiently this way, when I start getting everyone’s abstracts and papers down the road.
Expect more emails during the week for more detailed instructions on the upcoming deadlines. I look forward to reading your papers over the subsequent months. Have a good week.
Best Regards,
Xuan “Sophia” Nguyen CVU Board of Research Secretary Center for Advancement in Technology and Science (219)-555-6295
[April 24th, 2018, 10:57]
           Leopold’s eyes frantically jumped through the email from paragraph to paragraph. Down, down, up, down, up again. He took an anxious drag from his cigarette, then crushed the half-used remaining butt beneath his foot. He blew the smoke out, tucked his phone away in his pocket and burst back through the doors to the Center of the Advancement in Technology and Science. Martha waved to him, and he gave a forced smile and nod as he maneuvered through the sea of lab technicians that were scurrying back and forth between their labs, cluttering up the lobby. Normally he’d feel reassured if he wasn’t the only one rushing last minute to finish before the deadline. But he knew how much further behind his lab was compared to everyone else’s. This meant that he needed to accomplish years of research in a couple of months.
[04-24-2018; 11:00_Research_Video_Log_007_Start]
           He plunged through the front double doors to his lab to check in with Jeremy and Leslie who were hard at work on experiment one, still.
           “Sand in place to block excess heat transfer?” Jeremy said.
           “Check,” Leslie replied, “heat resistant gloves?”
           Jeremy’s hands were bare. He rifled through the pockets of his lab coat, pulled out the gloves and donned them.
           “Yeah…” he said hesitantly as he slipped his fingers into place.
           “How’s the piston doing?” Leopold asked.
           Over the last few days, Leopold managed to construct the final piece to their microscale time machine prototype from the parts that Jeremy gathered. It was a singular piston with the crankshaft that allowed it to go up and down secured to a rotating, circular platform on the table. The battery was built into the base of the platform that powered both the spinning and up-and-down motions. It looked like a record player. Very simplistic, but effective. Flip one switch, begin rotating the platform. The piston spins and eventually wraps the cosmic string around it to form a loop. Flip the other switch, the piston pumps up and down, thereby pushing the newly made cosmic loop toward the object intended for time travel.
           “It’s all intact! We’re going to try again right now,” Leslie said.
           Leslie lit the fuse on the thermite reaction. Just like the previous time, brilliant light and sparks erupted from the powders in the ceramic pot. She jumped back and Jeremy strenuously turned the crank to spin the metal pipe just above the fiery pot. The glowing redness of the reaction snaked its way along the pipe towards Jeremy’s hand. Leslie watched cautiously. He gave her a subtle nod to indicate that the gloves were still working. There were popping and clanging sounds in the metal bucket as the ceramic pot blew to bits inside.
           Wearing oven mitts, Leslie pushed the metal bucket out of the way and replaced it with Leopold’s piston-platform. The first switch was flipped, and the platform whirled around almost too fast for comfort. Jeremy clenched his teeth as his arm and hand began to cramp from rotating the crank so vigorously. He let go and jumped back next to Leslie to watch. Their motions were like clockwork from repeating the experiment so many times. The pipe rattled in its ring stand supports as it compacted the string of heat together.
           The redness at the far end of the pipe began to fade in exchange for a bright, golden thread-shaped mass that lazily slid out the other end towards the spinning piston. Leslie’s jaw dropped and Jeremy pointed forcefully at it.
           “There it is!” Jeremy shouted.
           “It’s working!” Leslie joined.
           They eventually had to shield their eyes; the energy made from the reaction was so great and so compact that some of the heat energy had to be converted into light-emitting energy. As more of the thread came out, the heat became more apparent. It felt like standing in front of an industrial oven. The string glared like a shimmering sunset reflecting off a body of water. The end of the thread reached out towards the spinning piston. The concentrated heat and light immediately dissipated upon contact. For a split second, the world went quiet with only a low hum to be heard followed by a resonating bass drop. 
          The room’s lighting promptly shifted from glistening and golden to shadowy and moody as the light scattered to the corners of the room before completely vanishing. Simultaneously, a forceful gust of hot wind burst forth from the pipe in all directions. All of the papers, folders, books, and the pack of orange sticky notes on the meeting table went flying along with Leslie’s half-empty coffee cup. The shear force and surprise knocked her off balance into Jeremy, which knocked him into Leopold standing behind both of them. Jeremy caught and held Leslie just as Leo had done for him. Leopold helped them both back to their feet.
           “That was great!” Jeremy exclaimed, “We have to do it again. Leslie let’s make another pot of reagents,” he said with determination. Jeremy took his first step and the world began to spin around him. He tipped forward, but was caught by the forearm by Leopold whose reflexes kicked in. Feeling dazed himself, Leopold led the two of them to the recently cleared meeting table to sit down.
           “We should wait a minute, Jeremy,” Leslie suggested, sluggishly, “the lab isn’t going anywhere,” she weakly chuckled while holding her head on discomfort.
           “The more progress we make, the more unexpected things we’ll find. We’ve got to be careful from here on out, boy,” Leopold said with a smirk.
           “We need to be focused from here on out,” he said, “Leslie and I saw this email that Sophia sent out with all the deadlines—”
           “I know, I read it before I came in,” Leo assured, “We do need to be focused. But we can still do that while resting a minute.”
           “We can still talk about it while we rest,” Jeremy suggested.
           Leopold laughed wryly.
           “Why do we think the string dissipated?” he continued, “Is the temperature difference between the piston and the string too small? Since energy flows from hot to cold, maybe the string doesn’t want to flow towards an already hot piston?”
           “I actually don’t think so,” Leslie interjected, lightly smiling at Jeremy’s determination to analyze the experiment, “The strings are very hot and condensed into an extremely small space for the amount of energy it holds. Even if the piston were on fire, the string would still be magnitudes hotter, so the piston would still appear ‘cold’ to the string.”
           Jeremy spotted a pen and notepad on the floor that had been blown off the table. He held up his finger while Leslie was talking and slipped out of his chair to retrieve them.
           “Boy, be careful!” Leopold urged.
           “It’s fine,” he said, limply falling to his knees from the vertigo. He landed near the notepad and pen. Keeping his head still to stop the world from spinning again, Jeremy made himself comfortable on the floor.
           He cleared his throat.
           “I’ll just work from here,” he said and began taking notes on what Leslie had said already.
           “Okay, come on, boy,” Leopold said, raising himself out of his seat and approaching Jeremy, “The only one who actually likes working on the floor is me, so— whoaa-a-a-oh.” he stumbled and cautiously lowered himself to the floor after becoming light-headed, himself. He sighed as he plopped himself down next to Jeremy who looked at Leo with a faintly smug grin.
           “I’m not sure that I see the appeal of working down here, but I can make do with it,” Jeremy poked fun.
           Leopold laughed.
           “We make one little break in our research and suddenly he’s a wise-ass,” he commented to Leslie who pulled her chair over to them, away from the table. Jeremy chuckled and continued writing with part of his tongue sticking out as he concentrated.
           “I think I have an idea of what it is, actually,” Leslie said. The boys looked up to her to continue, “It’s like what we saw in GraviTime, Jeremy, remember?”
           “Mmm, can you be more specific?”
           “When we made the cosmic strings, and we saw them dissipate! What did we do that made them dissipate?”
           “Oh, we stopped spinning them!”
           “Exactly!”
           “So, if we keep spinning the pipe, then it should… ohh… aww, that’s not going to be easy,” he said, realizing that he would have to be the one spinning the pipe.
      ��    “Okay, so, we’ll automate it,” Leopold said, shrugging.
           “Really?” Jeremy said.
           “Of course! If that’s what we need to do, then that’s what we’ll do to begin the next phase of the experiment. We’ll make a jig for the pipe like I did for the piston. It’ll be easy. I just need another motor and a few other parts.”
           “Are we up for a trip to Home Depot?” Leslie asked.
           Jeremy’s phone abrasively rang, scaring him to his feet. He looked at his messages to find another graduate student who TAs the same class as him. He’d just been reminded of the class he taught at noon. There wasn’t much time before then. He sighed in disappointment and gathered his things; the world had finally stopped spinning.
           “I actually have to go TA today and it looks like there might be a problem with the class, so…” he let out a frustrated exhale, “I can’t go today,” he said hesitantly.
           “That’s okay! It’s just a run to the store, anyway. You were here for the important part!” Leslie consoled.
           “We’ll be just fine, boy,” Leopold said with a relaxed grin, “Those students need you, too. Just come back when you’re able. We’ll hold down the fort while you’re gone.”
           Jeremy relaxed with their assurance.
           “Thanks, you guys,” he said softly. “I should be back between 3:30 and 4:00. I’ll see you both then.”
           They said goodbye and carried on their plans as he left the lab. As he wandered through to the exit of the building, he opened up the messages he’d received.
[JEREMY_RANDALL_CONVERSATION_START_11:29]
RD: hey bud i’ve got a student who overslept and missed my 8:00am lab RD: they said they wanna attend a different lab section so they don't get marked absent and yours is the only one that works with their schedule RD: you mind if they sit in? i’ll still grade their assignments B)
JB: Hi, Randall. JB: I’m heading over to campus right now. JB: Unfortunately, all the seats in my class are filled; I can’t let anyone new come in without going over the capacity. Are you sure there’s nobody else who can take them?
RD: yea :/ RD: we could just steal an extra chair from another lab that doesnt need it RD: tbh i don't think the boss would mind too much RD: its the end of the semester, i know he doesnt really keep track of that kinda stuff too much RD: if she misses this class and gets a zero on the last two assignments, shell probably fail the class
JB: Could she get at least a D if she does the assignments?
RD: yea i think
JB: Okay. I guess that’s fine. We’ll find a place for her to work so she can attend. What’s her name? I’ll make a space on my attendance sheet for her.
RD: her name is madison brilliant
JB: It is?
RD: yea RD: why you kno her or somethin? RD: … RD: dude you there? RD: hellooooo
JB: Yes, she’s my younger sister.
RD: omg no way! RD: lmao thats hilarious RD: tbh didn't know your last name so i didn't make the connection lol
JB: Well, now you know. JB: Thanks for the heads up. JB: I’ll get her assignment to you as soon as I can.
RD: shaka B)
[JEREMY_RANDALL_CONVERSATION_END_11:37]
 [April 24th, 2018, 11:49]
           Jeremy approached the classroom in which that taught every week. The remaining few students from the previous class finished leaving just as he walked in. The TA that taught before him had seemingly left already, despite still having students in the class. Didn’t seem to be the most responsible move, in Jeremy’s eyes. He made his way to his desk in the front of the room, facing all of the laboratory tables. There was a large cart in the front of the room containing piles of electronics for circuits like batteries, lightbulbs, resistors, and the like.
           He placed the attendance sheet at the end of his desk and wrote the instructions for the class on the board. Students began filing in, and quietly going through the motions that he had ingrained in them from the beginning of the semester. Come in, sign the attendance sheet, turn in the homework, pick up the graded assignments, and repeat. It was a well-oiled machine, likely out of indifference on the students’ part. And also their tendency to comply with the way Jeremy structured the class at the risk of losing points. But Jeremy liked to think that at least some of them appreciated the system.
           He faintly smiled and greeted each student who approached his desk to sign in. Some responded to him, others didn’t. Some only replied with zombie-like grunts of acknowledgement when he’d asked how they were. An odd one or two students replied audibly with a smile and asked how he was in return. He appreciated those students the most. They also tended to be the ones to turn in their assignments on time and get the most consistently good grades.
           Madison walked in, unassumingly, if a bit drowsy looking. She registered that she was attending Jeremy’s class and perked up on her way over to his desk. Jeremy felt a sinking feeling in his chest. His shoulders felt like they weighed a ton.
           “Well, well, well, look at what the cat dragged in!” she said in her goofiest tone.
           “I walked in of my own volition, Madison; cats are not allowed in the lab.”
           “Oh, that’s right, you don’t understand metaphors, I forgot,” she sighed.
           “Please sign in and turn in your assignments,” Jeremy changed the subject.
           “Oh. Uh, sure. You make your students write their names down?”
           “Yes.”
           “Randall just calls our names,” she said.
           “I prefer it this way,” Jeremy countered.
           Madison reached into her backpack and slapped her assignment down on Jeremy’s desk.
           “Bam! Turned in!”
           “Great. I got an extra chair for you for this class,” he said.
           “Gucci,” she said, “You gonna give your favorite sister an A today?”
           One of Jeremy’s other students walked in and recognized Madison. She squealed when she saw her.
           “Mads! What’re you doing, you in my class now?”
           “Hey girl! Nah, just for the day since I missed my class. Just shootin’ the shit with Jay, the TA who is also my fam!”
           Jeremy rolled his eyes and sighed.
           “Oh my god, no wayyyy! That’s definitely going on my story. Hit me up after class, let’s get lunch!”
           “Okay, good afternoon everybody, we’re going to get started with class, now,” Jeremy announced, walking to the front-center of the room and ushering students to their seats, “Hopefully all of you did the assigned reading because you needed it to complete the assignment you just turned in, and you’ll need it again for the activity today. We’re going to be building electrical circuits today, both series and parallel. If you flip to page 150 in your workbooks, you’ll find the procedure for the activity. I’ve listed a few modifications on the board, so make sure you take note of my changes while you’re working,” he paused to read the room, “Does anybody have any questions?”
           Silence.
           “Okay. Get to work. You can work in pairs or by yourself,” he projected his voice through the room.
           The students began talking and working as soon as he finished. He wondered if the lab would go faster because it was the last of the semester and they likely wanted to be done as soon as possible. He sat himself back down at his desk for only a brief moment before multiple students formed a line at his desk. It always perplexed him that he can ask the class if there are any questions and nobody speaks up, but the minute it’s time to work, suddenly there is a pile of students with questions.
           “Hi,” the first student said.
           “What can I do for you?” Jeremy asked politely.
           “So… I forgot to do the assignment for today, I was wondering if I could work on it in class while we do the lab and turn it in at the end of class?”
           “No, our class time is meant to be spent on the activities we had planned, sorry.”
           “It won’t take that long; I can do both!”
           “The syllabus outlines that assignments have to be turned in at the beginning of class. I can’t accept it if it’s late,” he explained.
           “So, there’s nothing I can do?” the student asked anxiously.
           “No, there isn’t,” Jeremy said bluntly.
           “Okay. Well, thanks anyway,” they said and returned to their seat.
           The next student froze a moment and began walking back, as well.
           “I had the same question as them,” the student said.
           “Okay,” Jeremy nodded.
           The third and final person was Madison. Her hands were locked together by her fingers and she meekly drew closer to Jeremy.
           “Hey, friendo, sooo… I forgot my workbook,” she said quickly, “What’s the, uh, the dealio? What should I do if I can’t do the activity?”
           Jeremy took a deep, stressed out, breath and thought about it.
           “Umm… why don’t you just partner up with someone who has their book. Just write down the answers on some loose paper. Make sure you number it so Randall will be able to tell which answers go to which questions.”
           “Gotcha. Alright, thanks, bud,” she said and returned to her desk.
4 notes · View notes
oldnebulabooks · 4 years
Photo
Tumblr media
TO SLEEP IN A SEA OF STARS by Christopher Paolini Rating: 3.5/5 Stars 
Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with an ARC of the first ten chapters in exchange for an honest review. Let me first start by saying that I was delighted to see Paolini return to the literary scene! And with a science fiction epic no less. I was obsessed with his Eragon series for YEARS as a wee young thing and am delighted to return to his books, this time both as a reviewer and as a fan. In terms of the review—I bounced back between 3 and 4 stars on this one, and eventually settled for a solid 3.5, because that’s ultimately what the sample struck me as. Solid. Not bad, not groundbreaking, but a staunch, interesting read. The good: I did like Kira, our protagonist. I admired that she wasn’t immediately willing to sacrifice herself for the “greater good”—it was refreshing to see a lead who complicated the hero narrative by caring desperately for her own survival and happiness as much as if not more the superordinate situation. Not that she didn’t care about others. She just wasn’t willing to suffer for the sake of a murky goal. Most of the other characters were interesting as well, though I didn’t see as much of them as I wanted to. Her love interest felt like a cardboard cut out—which makes a little sense, in context, though I still would have appreciated more development in that department. I won’t go into too many spoilers but I was also fascinated by the concept of the alien presence. I enjoy extraterrestrials in science fiction who really feel unlike anything I have seen or encountered before, and this one fit that bill. It’s also clear that Paolini has done his research. Though I’m no physicist, to me as a layperson the science of the story seemed very sound, from ship calculations to geology tidbits. These details were clearly curated and served to make the story feel more real. The Less Good: The pacing dragged in the beginning especially around chapter 5, which I won’t extrapolate upon just yet because of spoilers. In general I thought the pacing could have been notched up a level, but once the action kicked off I was drawn in. I also have to say it—the beginning felt predictable. Our protagonist, on the verge of having everything she ever wanted, only one chapter into book? It’s clear that it‘s all going to head down the drain pretty fast. I suppose every story had to start somewhere, though. Overall I enjoyed this sample, and I am excited to read the rest of the novel as soon as I can!
SONG PAIRING: Master Hunter by Laura Marling
11 notes · View notes
htttpjpg · 4 years
Text
Making profits in Real Estate
Tumblr media
Making money in Real Estate is the most popular technique to build wealth. If you're not currently making money and establishing wealth in real estate you need to start. I have been making money employing four very simple strategies that are very simple to duplicate. Many of the millionaires I have learned from make money and build large choice in real estate. That's right, all of them! These real estate strategies will be able to set you free for life! If you learn and utilize them you can build a massive amount of wealth in a very little while of time. I use a system for all four of the strategies that most go hand in hand. These strategies can easily make you rich in a really short period of time. I use the first strategy to make money fast, the actual strategy for making money in chunks and the third strategy is ideal for building wealth and creating income for the rest in my life. The last strategy I use to buy real estate extremely less expensive. I use a step by step system for all of these money making products. The first strategy requires in many cases no money and no credit score. It's the strategy I use to create anywhere from three to 12-15 thousand dollars in profits per deal in a short while of time without ever even buying real estate. This strategy referred to as wholesaling. It's easy to begin making quick money. You don't need dollars to make money with this strategy! If you have bad credit won't worry, you don't need good credit to make money with this technique. My goal is for you to have a check in your hands regarding $5, 000 or more in 30 days or less! I could show you my exact system on how to do it. From suppliers is nothing more than making an offer on a piece of realty, getting that offer accepted, then simply assigning to written agreement to someone else. Don't worry, making an offer in something doesn't mean you'll be forced to buy it". Building offers on Real Estate is easy! You can do it two strategies. Through a realtor or directly to sellers who don't have his or her homes listed with a realtor. I developed a specific precise system to find listed and unlisted properties to make presents on. Most of my deals are through listed real estate. I use a realtor to make offers for me on properties which have been listed. There are a lot of realtors who won't understand what you may be trying to accomplish. I'll teach you exactly the process I use to search out my realtors as well as how to get them on the same page whilst you with what you want to accomplish. There are so many properties for sale. You ought to learn how to find the best one's to make offers on. Learning easy methods to wholesale is the first step in becoming a real estate investor and also getting out of the rat race! In all of my money making procedures I believe it is the easiest one for both beginners plus advanced investors. I use the second strategy to create larger bits of cash anywhere from twenty to sixty thousand cash in profits per deal. It takes a little longer to produce those profits than the first strategy but one put up generates much more money. This strategy is called retailing. This strategy seems to have some great advantages. It's easy to make consistent $20, 000+ regarding every deal, it can be done part time, and it can and really should be done with someone else's money! Flipping real estate is treats like buying a house; fixing it up if it needs maintenance tasks, and then selling it for a profit. Most Real estate flippers that fail don't understand the number 1 rule, Buy Low-priced! When they buy a house most of them think they're buying the software cheap but chances are they're not. The biggest mistake buyers make is they don't calculate all of their costs before individuals do the deal. There is a specific formula that's easy to go along with that will make sure you follow this very important rule. The way you purchase your real estate is the difference between winning and losing. For anybody who is new to real estate investing the first strategy you should implement is without a doubt wholesaling. The reason is with wholesaling you learn how to make extra money without risking your own money. When you accomplish that therefore move to retailing. After you learn how to earn extra money wholesaling, you may have accomplished your first step in becoming a successful flipper. That first of all step is learning how to buy cheap! The third prepare I use to build wealth and get paid forever. By doing this When i create a monthly income that will last forever. Making money through Real Estate is not just creating quick cash; it's also about building enough wealth where you can literally never have to work again! This plan is known as buying and holding. There are many ways to build a Wealth creation Machine. The best way is through real estate investing focused on making wealth. Making money now is important but creating wealth for those rest of your life is what will set you free! Selecting real estate isn't hard, but, buying real estate correctly will be where most people go wrong. Understanding what makes up a good deal is the best greatest asset with this strategy. You make money when you order; you get paid when you sell. If you're a beginner this is the most important thing that must be understood. If you buy right you will have a wide range of equity and great cash flow for the entire time you own a special investment. This is what I refer to as building a money making device. In real estate there are many strategies to make money quick. Those is the strategies you should begin with because you have to learn how to buy affordable enough to make money. After those strategies are completed that is the time to worry about building for the rest of your life. You can get multiple ways to buy cheap it's all about learning those who will work for you. Now, once you know how to buy cheap making wealth is easy! Simply make sure you have great cash flow through each deal you intend on doing and before you know it once multiple deals you will start building monthly cash flow. Continue the simple recipe over and over and in a very short period of time you may be generating enough cash flow to live on then you can focus on finding rich and wealthy! Best of all you can focus on whatever you really want because you don't have to work if you don't want to. The reason this is the most popular real estate strategy is because I love residual income. Creating one thing once that pays you for the rest of your life will be smartest thing you can do financially. All my rich guides made this lesson very clear to me. Building a money making equipment first starts with making quick money in real estate. Once you understand that you will know how to buy real estate the right way. From there in your situation to do is hold it for cash flow for the others of your life! The final strategy I use to buy real estate extremely low-priced from distressed sellers. Buying cheap through properties on pre-foreclosure is a tremendous opportunity. There are so many ways to generate income in real estate. Many people have a hard time finding which will way fit's them the best. Some people like to stick to you strategy, others like a lot of different strategies. I recommend going through some research and reading some books to learn with regards to all the different ways there are to make money before you choose one particular. I recommend the following products because they should help you decide how much real estate strategy you want to pursue. Making money in real estate travels hand and hand with all of the other best money making practices. The reason is the tax advantages you get blend very well as well as all of the other money making strategies. Real estate investing is also one among my favorites because it is the best way to build ultimate huge selection that will last forever! Learning a simple money making strategy in your own home. The hard part is where and who ever ask to teach you? This used to be my problem until finally I met some very successful mentors. I discovered for them many strategies to get rich, this one is one of the finest. Making money in real estate is all about buying cheap! By discovering and buying distressed real estate you will be able to buy extremely cheap. Whoever has a way to buy real estate extremely cheap will succeed. Pre-foreclosure investing is a great way to buy cheap from distressed owners. It's a win-win situation for you and the seller. There are a few solutions to buy real estate in distressed situations. If a seller open for pre-foreclose which means they are behind on payments but their apartment hasn't been foreclosed on yet they would probably be very enthusiastic about selling. Most of the time people end up losing their homes as well as would have been much better off if someone was right now there to help them out of that situation. Like I believed, Win-Win situation. There are two scenarios for the buyer. There may be either already sufficient equity in the property for them to order it or there isn't enough equity. Most of the time there will never be enough. There is a simple money making strategy know as quite short sales for properties that don't have enough equity. Website the bank or mortgage company that has a lien on the building will most likely accept a huge discount on what they are owed frequently for a payoff of some amount for what there're owed. For example , if a property is worth $200, 000 as well as bank has a lien of $180, 000 for a place in not great shape they will probably accept an enormous discount. The reason is the cost they have to incur to foreclose, record, and resell is huge. You make them and offer within $100, 000 as a payoff. After negotiations they recognize $120, 000. You're now able to buy a $200, 000 home for $120, 000 through your knowledge. Obtain, these four Real Estate Investing Strategies all have the advantages and disadvantages. There is a sequential order they should be implemented in. Receive this information and use it to the best of your ability and stay smart and savvy out there.
1 note · View note
bluewatsons · 4 years
Text
Bert Musschenga, Is There a Problem With False Hope?, 44 J Med & Philosophy 423 (2019)
Abstract
This article offers a general discussion of the concept of false hope. Its ultimate aim is to clarify the meaning and the relevance of that concept for medicine and medical research. In the first part (Sections I–V), the concept of hope is discussed. I argue that hope is more than a combination of a desire and a belief about the probability that the desire will be fulfilled. Imagination and anticipation are as well components of hope. I also discuss if hope implies orientation to action. In the second part (Sections VI–VIII), I examine the concept of false hope. I show that hope is false if it cannot be justified epistemically. There is, I argue, an intimate relation between false hope and ignorance. Hope is justified—“realistic”—when the hoping person knows and accepts experts’ judgement about the probability of hope fulfillment. I then argue that what matters for evaluating a person’s hope is not only whether it is realistic, but also whether it is reasonable in the light of the aim and goals that a person strives for in (the remainder of) his life. Part three (Sections IX and X) goes into the question of what is morally wrong about having or causing false hope. In the fourth part (Sections XI and XII), the relevance is shown of the insights from the previous parts for the debate on false hope in medicine and clinical research.
I. Introduction
Hope is a term frequently used in everyday situations, including existential crisis situations. “I am hopeful that we will get the house at that price,” a woman says to her friend after they have made an offer on a house. “There is still hope!” says the doctor to a man whose wife was taken to a hospital after a massive cerebral hemorrhage. Being a Dutch citizen, I hope that the Netherlands will be spared from terrorist attacks. Besides hope, we also have the term “false hope” which clearly has a negative connotation. In the discussion in the Netherlands about the “Bed, bread and bath”-scheme for illegal immigrants, it was repeatedly said that one should not give asylum seekers false hope. Hope for a better life encourages tens of thousands of people to leave their homes and to begin a gruesome journey through many countries toward a future which—they think—will be better than the insecurity, poverty, and hopelessness in which they live. According to some, their hope is usually false. Hope of postponing death increasingly drives many who suffer from a lethal disease to undergo new treatments, including experimental yet insufficiently tested treatments. Their hope is also often called false. But when is hope false? Is it bad to have false hope? Is it better to have no hope than false hope? This article explores these questions. In the first part (Sections I–V), I discuss the components of the concept of hope. In the second part (Sections VI–VIII), the concept of false hope is discussed. Part three (Sections IX and X) goes into the question of what is morally wrong about having or causing false hope? In the fourth part (Sections XI and XII), the relevance is shown of the insights from the previous parts for the debate on false hope in medicine and medical research.
II. What Is Hope?
Many important thinkers have discussed hope, but only a few of them have made hope the central theme of their thinking.1 For most thinkers, hope is just one of the themes to which they pay attention. When we classify them according to the tradition to which they belong, it is mainly thinkers of the Continental phenomenological tradition such as Marcel and Pieper who deal with basic hope—hope in existential crisis situations. Another classification of thinkers places emphasis either on what hope is and when we hope or for what we (may) hope. The last question is primarily discussed by theologians or philosophers from the Christian tradition.2 Because my focus is on what distinguishes false hope from hope, I largely restrict myself to a philosophical tradition that offers the best tools for dealing with that question: the analytic tradition. My starting point is the definition by John Patrick Day (1969) who departs from David Hume’s (1896) ideas about hope.
According to Hume, hope and its counterpart, fear, are emotions—passions. Both are mixtures of two different emotions, pain, and pleasure. He relates pain with the term “grief” and pleasure with the term “joy.” If something that, when certain, would make us pleased is uncertain and only probable, then it brings us hope. If something that, when certain, would bring us insight is that probability is the cause of hope and fear:
Tis a probable good or evil, that commonly produces hope or fear; because probability, being a wavering and inconstant method of surveying an object, causes naturally a like mixture and uncertainty of passion. (1896, Book II, Part III, Section IX)
Day follows Hume in his ideas about the role of probability in hope. Contrary to Hume, hope and fear are for Day not themselves mixtures of the emotions joy and grief, but they bring these emotions along. Hope consists not of one, but two elements: a desire for something (conative aspect) and a be- lief regarding the likelihood of fulfilling that desire (cognitive aspect). When Hume says that hope and fear cannot occur together, Day says it is possible. Mixed feelings do exist. Those who hope to win are at the same time afraid to lose. Both elements of hope are, according to Day, expressed in the following basic statement, which in my free interpretation reads as follows:
The statement “A hopes that p” is true iff “A desires that p (is fulfilled), and A thinks that there is—however small—a chance that p (will be fulfilled)” is true.3
For Day, “desire” and “belief that the probability of fulfilment is greater than 0 and less than 1” are both necessary conditions for hope. Together, they form a sufficient condition. This view is shared by another influential English philosopher, Robert Downie.4 Day’s definition is not undisputed. Some of Day’s critics find that hope has nothing to do with probability, whereas others believe that the definition is incomplete. I will briefly discuss both forms of criticism.
III. Hope and Probability
The uncertainty that desires will be fulfilled is for Hume the cause of hope. Uncertainty means that the probability of fulfillment is greater than 0 (0 = impossible) and less than 1 (1 = certain). In this approach, hoping is not irrational. However, some thinkers hold the opinion that hope is basically something irrational. Nicholas Smith (2008) refers to a statement by the Belgian philosopher of science Isabelle Stengers, known for her publications—with Ilya Prigogine—about chaos theory, which she said in an inter- view: “If we follow [the] probability, there is no hope” (Stengers, 2002, 245). In her view, one can only be said to hope for a thing or a state of affairs if a rational calculation of chances and probability indicates that it makes no sense to desire that thing or state of affairs. Hope goes beyond rationality. To give an example of what she might mean: No one has ever returned from death. This does not prevent Peter from hoping that he will be the first to come back.
Is Stengers right? Suppose that 5 million Dutch people buy a lottery ticket. The chance of winning the prize is 1:5 million. Rationally speaking, buying a ticket is a waste of money, but I suspect that only a few people decide to buy a ticket after making a rational calculation of the probability of winning. Still, all participants hope that they hit the jackpot. Why else would they take part in the lottery? All that matters to them is that it is possible that they hit the jackpot. I do not deny that people sometimes deliberately do not want to know the probability of winning so as not to get discouraged. Yet, even those people must not only believe that it is possible that their desire gets fulfilled, but also—at least implicitly—assume that the chance of winning is greater than zero. As Hume said, the question of when I can be said to hope for something cannot be answered without referring to prob- ability. For Hume, Day, and Downie, having a desire for p and believing that the probability of fulfillment of p is >0 and <1 are both necessary conditions for hoping p. I agree with them. Now does this also constitute a sufficient condition, as they claim? Various contemporary authors deny that. I limit myself to discussing two proposals for completing these two conditions with other elements: the elements “imagination and anticipation” and “action orientation.”
IV. Hope, Imagination, and Anticipation
First, I will discuss the element that I call imagination and anticipation. Spinoza calls hope a feeling of unstable joy generated by the image of a future or of a thing in the future or in the past (1985, Part III, thesis XVIII, note 2). Are imagination and anticipation essential to hope? Jan gives a party for his friends. Late in the evening Clara, a good friend, appears. “Did you hope I would come?” she asks Jan. He replies that he had expected that she would come and that he is glad that she is there. Clara is not satisfied with that answer. She responds by saying: “I don’t want to know if you expected me to come, but if you had hoped that I would come.” Suppose that Jan had neither thought of Clara and nor wished that she would come. Could he then in good faith answer that he had hoped for her to come? It seems clear that the answer would be negative. If he had really hoped that she would come, he might perhaps have noticed she was still not there and might have wondered whether she would still come. This example makes it clear that hope is more than the sum of an uncertain expectation and a desire. What is needed in addition, says Luc Bovens, is “mental imaging.” A prerequisite for hope is that you imagine from time to time what you hope. That is what Martin Luther King did when he said he had a dream (Bovens, 1999, 674). Those who say they hope for a better world, but never devote a single thought to it, do not really hope for it. A woman who is pregnant does not wait until the child arrives, but tries to imagine what the child will look like and what it will be like to be a mother. She does not wait, but anticipates a future situation (Waterworth, 2004).5
V. Hope Between Resignation and Action
The next element I want to discuss is what I call, for lack of a better term, the action orientation of hope. Suppose I hope to become very old. What precisely it means to be very old, I do not know. Moreover, I consider it more or less likely that I will reach old age, but whether that will happen I also do not know. I am aware that what age I will reach depends on many factors beyond my control. Because of that lack of total control, Ariel Meirav (2009) characterizes hope as a resignating desire. Speaking of resignating hope does not mean, says Meirav, that the desire cannot be fulfilled, but that one does not have total control over the fulfillment of the desire. This does not mean that it is completely impossible to exert any influence at all (Meirav, 2009, 229). Having a resignating desire implies recognizing that something other than yourself—an external factor—will determine the fulfillment of your desire. Hope is believing that this external factor will play a positive role.6
Is Meirav right when he emphasizes that hope means admitting not having total control over the fulfillment of a desire? If I apply for a grant for the re- search I want to do on the determination of the risk-benefit ratio in clinical studies, I hope that it will be honored, even when the chance is perhaps only 10%. The influence I can have on the outcome is very modest. But if I do my part badly, the chance of the application being honored becomes even smaller. Other authors therefore emphasize that hoping implies striving to do whatever is possible to do. We must, says Victoria McGeer (2004), learn that the limitations that we experience when trying to realize a desire should not be seen as limitations of our causal influence, but as side-constraints that we can move when acting. Hope is the energy and direction that we can offer, not only making the world into how we want it to be, but regulating and developing our capacities to act. Hoping is to offer the motivational force for using and developing our abilities to fulfill our desires. Hoping is using our abilities to be imaginatively and constructively engaged in the world around us, even in the face of our limitations. Hope is inseparably connected to the belief in self-empowerment. We find a similar view in Philip Pettit (2004). He says that substantial, non-superficial hope is based on a cognitive decision—a volition—to act as if the desired prospect will become a reality or at least as if it has a good chance to be realized. Just as taking preventive measures means acting as if that which is feared will happen.
For McGeer and Pettit, hope seems necessarily to be active hope. Those who hope commit themselves to do what is possible. However, for Meirav hope seems to be mostly passive hope. The active conception of hope is supported by the “hope theory” of the American psychologist Charles Snyder.7 He considers hope as a process of thinking. Hope is primarily a combination of thinking about goals and thinking about pathways that can be followed to achieve those goals. Moreover, hope is also “agency thinking”—thinking that focuses on the person’s abilities to find ways that lead to the desired goals, and to keep following those ways. “Agency thinking” especially occurs if one is confronted by obstacles and difficulties, and then one must also provide and channel the mental energy (motivation) to overcome them. Thinking about goals and about pathways to those goals occurs repeatedly, and they cross-fertilize each other.8
The active and passive visions of hope are not mutually exclusive. Although the view of hope as resignating desire emphasizes recognizing the limitations of one’s own influence, it is consistent with the recognition that accepting not having total control over the fulfillment of a desire does not exclude being active where one can still exert some influence. McGeer, a supporter of the concept of hope as active hope, is well aware that hope cannot operate without insight into the limited opportunities one has to influence the achievement of that for which one hopes. She also emphasizes that it is imperative to act where and when this is possible, and to develop capacities for acting constructively and creatively. My conclusion regarding the claim that hope needs to be orientated to action is that hope is not necessarily active hope. Hoping does imply acting where possible and adopting an attitude of resignation when acting is no longer an option. If two men compete for the hand of the same woman, there comes a time when they can only hope that the woman’s choice will be in their favor. However, if they had not fought before that time to get the woman’s favor, one might have wondered how strong and sincere their desire was to win her.
If we accept the two discussed additional components, we come to the following definition of hope: The statement “A person S hopes that p” (a thing or an event) if and only if he or she:
desires that p;
(implicitly or explicitly) thinks that the probability that p being realized is greater than 0 and less than 1;
imagines how it will be if p is realized
anticipates it; and
is actively working to bring about p where possible, and where this is not possible resigns thereto.
VI. True and False Hope
Snyder—the father of “hope theory”—wrote with some colleagues an important article about false hope (Snyder et al., 2002). Many people, they say, claim that true hope is grounded in reality whereas false hope results from significant distortions of reality. According to Snyder et al., people with “high hope”—a high degree of hope—are not guilty of distorting reality. However, they do have positive illusions. They have a too positive view of themselves, reality, and their possibilities and opportunities. People with “low hope”— little hope—are the ones who suffer from distortion of reality, as well as processes of denial and repression, according to Snyder et al. People with “high hope” stay within what the psychologist Roy Baumeister (1989) calls the “optimal margin of illusion.” Their illusions have beneficial effects and improve their adaptation to reality. According to Snyder et al., false hope is also associated with the pursuit of too many objectives at the same time or by choosing the wrong paths to achieve one’s goal. Even those phenomena do not occur among people with “high hopes.” They conclude that false hope does not exist, by which they mean that false hope is absent among people who really hope—who have “high hopes.” However, one of the premises which Snyder et al. assume is that positive illusions do not distort reality, but only color reality in a way that benefits the one who hopes. The difference between coloring and bias seems to be exclusively based on the quality of the effects on the welfare of the person who hopes.
Snyder et al. suggest that the counterpart of false hope is true hope—hope that is free from distortions of reality, but not free from beneficial positive illusions. This conception of true hope seems to rest on the assumption that it is not only possible to distinguish between views that distort reality and views that positively color reality, but also between views that distort and do not distort reality. Although it might be possible to agree to a certain extent on which views distort reality, the possibility of an agreement on an undistorted view of reality seems to be an illusion.
A more fruitful approach to false hope ties in with Day’s distinction between having hope and having justified hope (Day, 1991, 76–80). As we have seen, hope has two elements: a desire and a belief (about the probability of fulfillment of the desire). The justification of hope is directed at both elements. Hope is, according to Day, justified if it can be shown (1) that no objections are possible to the object of desire on moral, prudential, or aesthetic grounds (= conative element), and if it can be shown (2) that hope is reasonable (realistic) (= cognitive element). The criterion for reasonability is the intersubjective judgement of competent judges about the probability of the fulfillment of what is hoped for. I call justification of the conative element of hope normative justification and justification of the cognitive element epistemic justification. False hope is an epistemic concept. Only epistemic justification is relevant for determining if hope is false. Epistemologists distinguish between true belief, justified belief, and true and justified belief. Justified belief can nonetheless be false. Applying the same distinctions to hope, we get true hope, justified hope, and true and justified hope. False hope would then be the counterpart of true hope. However, since the belief that is part of hope is not a statement of fact, but a probability statement, from an epistemic point of view hope cannot be true, it can only become true. Neither can hope be false, it can only turn out to be false. Hope changes into certainty as soon as it has become either true or false. If stating that S’s hope for x is false is not a descriptive but a predictive statement, what is then the practical use of such statements? Is it only a warning for becoming disappointed? My proposal is to reinterpret false hope as epistemically unjustified hope. Saying to someone that her hope is false should then be regarded as a call for critically examining the grounds of her hope.
VII. False Hope and Ignorance
If false hope should be conceived as unjustified hope, what is the cause of this lack of justification? In my view, ignorance is the cause, the lack of relevant information about the chances that the desire that constitutes hope will be realized. To illustrate the role of ignorance in false hope, here are some examples. Emma is an unhappy young woman without friends and admirers. She thinks that her unhappiness is due to her physical unattractiveness and plain looks. She decides to consult a cosmetic surgeon who advises her to have a breast enlargement and a facial surgery of mouth, jaw, and nose. These operations indeed make her more attractive and liked. Although satisfied with these changes, she still feels unhappy. After consulting a psychotherapist, it becomes clear to her that the causes of unhappiness should be sought in neglect during her childhood. Emma’s false hope with regard to the effects of cosmetic surgery were caused by ignorance concerning the real nature of her problems. Another example: Peter applies for a research grant at an organization for scientific research for a study on the ethics of phase-1 trials. Two of the reviewers gave the application the highest rating (A +) and one a slightly lower rating (A). On the basis of the very enthusiastic reports of all three, Peter had good hope that the grant would be awarded. His hope was false because he did not know the policy that applications that do not have three A + are rejected automatically. A third example: Shania, an obese woman of 43 years, wants to lose weight. She hopes to lose 30% of her weight. However, after treatment, she has only lost 16 kg. As with many other women in her situation, she is disappointed with the result of the treatment. The cause of their false hope is lack of knowledge and insight about the difficulty of losing weight. Overweight dieters tend to believe that weight is malleable (Polivy, 2001).
People with false hope base their hope on an assessment of the prob- ability of fulfillment that does not correspond to what Day would call the standard assessment of competent judges. False hope results from cognitive deficiency, from ignorance. The example of Emma shows that false hope not only results from an unjustified belief about the likelihood of fulfilling a desire, but also from an unjustified desire. Hope can also be false if it is based on an incorrect picture of the value, the desirability of the object of desire, in Emma’s case cosmetic surgery.
If false hope is indeed based on ignorance, hope must disappear when the ignorance is lifted. Many refugees set forth to a country in Europe where they hoped to be welcomed and have the possibility to build a new life. They often started out ignorant of the many dangers and problems they would meet. It turned out that their journey was more costly and more dangerous than they expected and that they were not welcome in a lot of countries. It seems evident that their hope was false. However, although some of these refugees might not have gone had they known beforehand what would happen to them, I suspect that many of them would still have gone. The majority of the refugees would probably still have hope, even when they were no longer ignorant but well informed. It is important to make a distinction between hope that is based on ignorance and hope that goes along with ignorance without being based on it. Hope can only be called false when it is based on ignorance. The hope of the majority of refugees goes along with ignorance but is not based on it. Therefore, it cannot be called false hope.
VIII. Realistic and Reasonable Hope
If false hope is based on ignorance, its counterpart seems to be well-informed hope. However, having all the information one needs for making a decision does not mean that one also takes all the information into account. Knowing the probability of the realization of a desire is not the same as being well aware of it. Someone who hopes for a job, knows that the probability that she gets it is 10%, but is already looking for a house in the vicinity of the location of her future employer, demonstrates that she is not very aware of the low probability. Her hope is not realistic. Realistic hope is the term I prefer for the counterpart of false hope over well-informed hope. Determining if hope is realistic is, as we have seen for Day, one of the aims of justifying hope. His criterion for justification of hope is the intersubjective judgement of competent judges about the probability of the fulfillment of what is hoped for. I do not think that experts’ judgement about the probability of hope fulfillment is the only thing that matters for evaluating hope. The following example makes this clear. Andrea and Johan have both applied for a job. They are both aware that their chances are no more than 10%. Contrary to Andrea, Johan still hopes to get the job. The explanation is that they have a different threshold for the acceptability of the probability of fulfillment of hope. Andrea’s threshold is much higher than that of Johan. She continues hoping when Johan finds the low probability a reason to give up hoping. Judgements about what an acceptable threshold is are not objective but person-relative.9 Experts assess the probability of desire fulfillment, not the acceptability of thresholds of the chances for desire fulfillment. Johan’s hope is realistic. It would have been false if he could only keep hoping when rejecting the experts’ assessment of the probability of the realization of the desire as too low. What matters beside hope being realistic is if it is reasonable in light of the purposes that the person who hopes is striving for. Hoping for the job is reasonable for Johan because it would give him the opportunity to realize his deepest aspirations whereas it is not realistic for Andrea, for whom it means no more than fun and well-paid work. Refugees’ hope for getting a better life in Europe is realistic if they accept the low chance. It is reasonable if there no alternative available. 10
It is time for an interim balance. I argued that false hope is hope that cannot be justified epistemically. False hope is hope that is based on ignorance. Hope is justified when the hoping person knows and accepts experts’ judgement about the probability of hope fulfillment. Justification determines if hope is realistic. What matters for evaluating someone’s hope is not only whether it is realistic, but also whether it is reasonable.
IX. Is Having False Hope Morally Wrong or Bad?
Although it is strange to ask whether having or instilling hope is morally desirable or undesirable, in the case of false hope it is a legitimate question. If false hope is a moral problem, having or instilling it should be counteracted.
False hope can occur in various situations and contexts. Some people are possibly more susceptible to having false hope than others, but no one is immune. The moral evaluation of false hope can be approached from two ethical points of view. One point of view is to look at the ratio between positive and negative effects of false hope as a form of hoping, first of all for the well-being of the person who hopes, but also of his or her social environment. That is the consequentialist perspective: When the positive effects of having false hope exceed the negative ones, the right thing to do is to promote false hope. The other point of view combines elements of the virtue-ethical perspective and the deontological perspective. False hope can be caused by either the actions, omissions, and vices of the bearer of hope, or by the actions, omissions, and vices of other persons. Deontology evaluates the intrinsic value of the actions and omissions resulting in false hope. Virtue ethics looks at the moral quality—the character—of the actors.
I start with the consequentialist perspective, which focuses on the effects of hoping, first of all for the well-being of the hoping person. Psychological studies show associations between self-reported hopefulness and academic achievement, athletic performance, physical health, and wellness, coping with illness and loss, psychological adjustment, social-emotional problem- solving, and the quality of interpersonal relationships (Rand and Cheavens, 2009). Hope can have positive as well as negative effects. The negative effects of hope are limited to the disappointment and frustration that occur when the hope does not materialize. This also applies to false hope. Some psychologists think that it does not matter whether hope is false, because all hope that does not come true turns out to be false (Lazarus, 1999). This view seems to be wrong because it is plausible to assume that the feelings of frustration and disappointment may be bigger and more destructive if it appears that the hope was false. If someone who hopes for a job does not get that job, she will be frustrated. She will be extra frustrated if it turns out that her hope was false, that she was wrong in assuming that she had a chance when she did not have a chance from the very beginning.
From a consequentialist perspective, false hope only becomes a moral problem when the negative effects outweigh the positive ones. Consequentialists, however, do not pay attention to the causes of false hope. As I argued in Section VII, false hope results from a cognitive deficiency, a form of ignorance. Contrary to a consequentialist perspective, a moral evaluation of false hope from a virtue-ethical and deontological perspective also looks at the sources and the causes of the ignorance that are connected with it. Ignorance can result from the actions, omissions, and the character of either the hoping person him or herself or of others. Ignorance caused by the actor him or herself can either be culpable or not culpable. Ignorance is culpable when a person has made insufficient effort to take notice of available information or to collect information necessary for making responsible choices. If a motorist killed a child because the brakes of his car were worn—a fact he was not aware of—his ignorance is culpable. He can be accused of negligence, because motorists are required to have their brakes checked regularly. When a motorist causes a bomb explosion by running into a wire stretched across a road, his ignorance is not culpable because there is no obligation to check whether there are wires stretched over the road, unless he knew that he was driving within a war zone.
Does the falsity of hope affect the moral character of hope—universally regarded as a virtue—if it results from actions, omissions, or the character of the hoping person? Does it make false hope a bad thing? Ignorance, the source of false hope, rarely flows from an intentional decision to shield oneself from information or not to collect information relevant for making decisions. It is more common that it is caused by both epistemic and moral vices such as laziness, carelessness, and sloppiness. False hope caused by such vices is clearly blameworthy when it leads to harming the interests of others. Think of the father who decides to leave his country with his family during a war, without informing himself about the best routes and the best destination. If by taking another route he could have avoided crossing the Mediterranean Sea on a dangerous ship, he is morally responsible when his family drowns. Should we also blame a person for his or her ignorance-based false hope if it does not cause any harm to others? Imagine that a young unmarried woman suddenly decides to leave Syria and starts out for Germany without careful preparation, hoping that she will be welcomed with hospitality. She falls into the hands of a criminal gang who demands that she pay €5,000 for crossing the Mediterranean by boat from Libya to Italy. However, the criminals just cash the money and disappear, leaving her behind without a penny. Did she commit a moral wrong by leaving uninformed and unprepared? What she did was, although morally permissible, certainly not virtuous. Her ignorance was culpable.
Some forms of ignorance are not easy to classify as either inculpable or culpable. I especially have in mind ignorance that results from self-deception. According to Alfred Mele, self-deception occurs when people have a belief p, and only if p is false, that is formed in a “suitable biased way” (Mele, 2001, 120). Examples are positive or negative misinterpretation of information, selectively dividing attention and selectively collecting evidence. The wife of a sailor whose ship perished years ago can continue hoping that he comes back, as long as his body is not found. However, that is extremely unlikely since the ship sank at a place where the sea is 1-km deep. Her hope, originating from self-deception, is false. Self-deception might be seen as morally permissible as long as it does not harm a person’s own interests and welfare or that of others (Martin, 1986). Let us assume that the wife of the sailor invests all her energy in the search for her husband while neglecting her children and other obligations such as her job. Can we hold her morally responsible for these undesirable consequences of her false hope? Opinions diverge on this issue. Mele (2001, 103) argues that many sources of bias are controllable and that self-deceivers can recognize and resist the influence of emotion and desire on their belief acquisition and retention, particularly in matters they deem to be important, moral or otherwise. Neil Levy (2004, 309), however, finds that, since it is rarely the case that self-deceivers possess the requisite awareness of the biasing mechanisms operating to produce their self-deceptive belief, they are unable to curb the effects of these mechanisms.
X. Is Causing False Hope Morally Wrong?
In many cases of inculpable ignorance, it is still possible to designate someone who is responsible for the actor’s ignorance. How should we judge those who cause false hope in the hoping person? When a motorist’s car had been in the garage for maintenance, but the mechanic failed to alert her that the brakes had to be replaced, the cause of her ignorance was the negligence of the mechanic. The mechanic may have deliberately failed to inform the motorist because he hoped that she would crash with the car. This is a clear case of malicious intent. Omitting information need not be motivated by malice. It can be done with the best intentions. A father may conceal from his son a letter informing that he is not admitted to a master’s program at one of the leading universities. He wants his son to keep hoping that he has a chance to be admitted. He does so in order not to spoil his son’s holiday.
The father acts morally wrongly. It is contrary to the principle of respect for autonomy to keep someone ignorant by withholding information, even with the best intentions. The son does not get the opportunity to draw his own conclusions from the information that is kept from him. The father’s act is also morally wrong from a consequentialist perspective because he can expect that the son will not only be frustrated but will also feel deceived if he hears that the letter was already delivered before their holidays.
More complicated are cases in which others have the opportunity to expose false hope caused by self-deception. One could argue that it is morally wrong not to expose the sailor’s wife’s self-deception and her false hope, even with the best intentions. However sad the truth may be, she should get the chance to resume her life in an autonomous way after accepting that her husband should be considered dead. Not exposing the wife’s false hope is prima facie wrong. There might be circumstances that justify an exception. The sailor’s wife might be so extremely unstable that she cannot bear the truth without completely breaking down mentally. In such a case, the moral wrong of causing a breakdown outweighs the moral wrong of not telling the truth.
I argued that causing someone to hope falsely is prima facie wrong. So is not exposing false hope. Having false hope is morally wrong if the hope is based on culpable ignorance and may harm the interests of others. False hope that does not affect the interests of others is morally permissible but not virtuous.
XI. False Hope and Medical Treatments
False hope is a topic frequently discussed within the medical community. In this section, I discuss false hope in the context of decisions about treatments that are a matter of life and death. In the next section, I turn to false hope in the context of medical research. In the context of treatments, false hope is related to the chance that a treatment results in a cure, prolongation of life, improvement of health, or the quality of life. A large number of studies show that having hope is very important for those who are ill. Hope makes ill people feel better, improves their mood, strengthens their motivation to undergo treatment and may even increase the chance that treatments are successful (Snyder, Irving, and Anderson, 1991; Schrank, Stanghellini, and Slade, 2008).11 Although they are aware of the risk that patients may acquire false hope or persist in their false hope, doctors fear that without the belief in a possibly effective treatment patients may fall into despair. They are not aware of the distinction between disappointment and despair or hopelessness. This mistake is also made by authoritative psychologists. “We hope because we must despair without hope,” says Richard Lazarus (1999, 674). Immediately thereafter he says, “As such, the capacity to hope is a vital coping resource. The coping process is, as it were, built into hope as an emotion” (Lazarus, 1999, 674). The assumption, that when a particular hope does not become realized a gap is created that is automatically filled by despair, is not correct. Despair or hopelessness is, according to Mathew Ratcliffe, not the loss of a particular hope, but of the ability to hope. Ratcliffe distinguishes between “intentional hope”—hope for p—and “pre-intentional hope.” The latter is a more fundamental attitude of hopefulness. Loss of the hope for p does not imply the loss of the fundamental attitude of hopeful- ness (Ratcliffe, 2013, 600). A sick person who hoped that the first treatment would be successful may lose hope for success of this particular treatment without losing the hope that an effective treatment will be found.
It used to be common for physicians not to give a patient complete information or even to withhold the truth when they thought that he or she could not cope with the whole truth. Currently, doctors tip the balance sometimes to the other side: telling patients everything. In his book The Anatomy of Hope, the oncologist-hematologist Jerome Groopman (2004) tells that he first learned from his mentor not to tell the whole truth to patients. After seeing how angry patients and their families can be when they realize that they are lied to, he became a follower of “the ideology of the right to know” and told his patients everything about their illness and their prognosis (Groopman, 2005, 43). Only later did he come to realize how important hope is: Doctors should not only tell their patients the truth but also gave them hope. They must know how to find the middle ground between “hope” and “truth” (Groopman, 2005, 57).
To what extent are physicians responsible for their patients’ false hope? False hope can arise because doctors do not, or do not completely, inform patients about the treatment’s chance of success or about the quality of life after treatment.12 If a doctor does this unintentionally, his omission is still a form of culpable negligence. Because of his negligence, the doctor is responsible for instilling false hope. When a doctor informs a patient incorrectly or incompletely because he is afraid that the patient cannot bear the truth, his behavior is paternalistic. “Lying at the bedside” is prima facie morally wrong because it is contrary to the principles of respect for autonomy and veracity.13 Prima facie means that there is room for exceptions, provided that they are justified. Let us take a look at a possible exception.
Suppose that a mentally unstable patient with lung cancer responds very well to chemotherapy. The tumor remission is already more than 50%. The patient regains hope and thinks that it is possible that he will get a few extra years. The doctor then finds that the tumor has spread to other parts of the body but, knowing how important and beneficial having hope is, she is hesitant to tell him that because she is convinced that he will lose all hope, fall into despair, and may want to stop the chemotherapy. Not telling the truth may perhaps mean that the patient only starts preparing for his death, when the spreading of the tumor becomes undeniable and death is imminent. I do not think that an exception to the principles of respect for autonomy and veracity is justified in this case, but a final judgement requires knowledge of the relevant facts of the case. As we have seen, loss of hope does not necessarily imply that a patient falls into despair.
XII. False Hope and Experimental Medical Research
Most medical literature on false hope deals with false hope of patients participating in experimental medical research, and especially in phase-I trials. Participants in phase-I trials of an entirely new drug are usually patients who no longer respond to standard treatments. After hearing the bad news, such patients often ask their doctor: “Is there nothing that you still can do for me, doctor?” The doctor might respond by saying that the patient possibly fulfils the inclusion criteria of a phase-I study for a new, experimental drug. Being a phase-I study, this study does not focus on the effectiveness of the drug but aims to establish the maximum tolerated dose. The probability that the study participants personally benefit from participating is no more than 1%.
People rarely participate in phase-I studies solely for altruistic reasons. They (also) take part because they think it will benefit them personally— usually by extending their life or by improving their quality of life. When is hope for personal benefit false? When patients think that the personal bene- fits of participating are greater than they actually are and especially when they think the chances of these benefits are greater than they really are. In such cases, patients’ hope cannot be justified and is therefore unrealistic. The majority of patients with cancer at an advanced stage who participate in phase-I studies think that the aim is to determine what their therapeutic effects are (Cox, 2002; Daugherty, Ratain and, Grochowski, 1995, Joffe et al., 2001). Two notions are used to capture this misunderstanding: therapeutic misconception and therapeutic misestimation (Pentz et al., 2012). A therapeutic misconception exists when individuals do not understand that the defining purpose of clinical research is to produce generalizable knowledge, not personal benefits (Appelbaum, Roth, and Lidz, 1982; Appelbaum et al., 1987). Therapeutic misestimations are overestimations of either the general or the personal probability of the benefits of a trial.
Therapeutic misconceptions and misestimations are very persistent. Some patients still think that participation in a trial will bring them medical benefit, although their doctor has repeatedly emphasized that medical benefits are not the goal of the treatment and that the chance of “collateral” personal benefit is almost nil. In such cases, the doctor is not responsible for the occurrence of false hope. What should a physician do when he observes the persistency of a patient’s false hope? Should he exclude a patient from participating in this study if it shows that his real motive for participation is false hope? If he does, he may take away the patient’s last hope. But if he admits the patient to the study, does he not become complicit in the patient’s self-deception? I want to emphasize again that hope should not be regarded as false too soon. If a patient knows, and is aware, that the probability of participating in a study will result in personal medical benefit of only 3%, and he still hopes for benefit, his hope is realistic. His hope is also reasonable if it serves his personal objectives. Hope is false if a patient persists in an incorrect assessment of the probability that she will benefit from participating in an experimental study, despite her doctor’s repeated attempts to correct this assessment. Apparently, the patient does not want to know the truth. In such a case, the doctor should admit her to a study if this is what she really wants.
Physicians may also be indirectly responsible for the occurrence of false hope. If a doctor is personally involved in the study as a researcher, then the information he gives to the patient may become biased. When doctors have an interest in enrolling a sufficient number of subjects in a study, this may influence the way they frame the information about the pros and cons of participating. That does not mean that they are not honest or do violence to the truth. Information is always framed. A salesman who does not give as much attention to the weaknesses of his product as to its strengths can still not be said to cheat the customer. A doctor who is also on the research team is expected to inform potential participants about the risks of side effects and the minimal chances of personal benefit. In addition, he will undoubtedly also mention the benefits of participation: regular visits to the hospital will enable patients to give structure to their life, subjects receive extra attention and the best care, the research is of great importance for science and for future patients. It is not inconceivable that patients will then acquire false hope that is insufficiently based on the facts.
XIII. Conclusion
In the first part of this article, I aimed at clarifying that hope is more than a combination of a desire and an assessment of the probability that the desire is fulfilled which is >0 and <1. Imagination and anticipation are also components of hope. Moreover, hope implies acting where possible and resignation when acting is no longer an option. In the second part, I showed that hope is false if it cannot be justified epistemically. There is, I argued, an intimate relation between false hope and ignorance. Hope is false, if it is based on ignorance of the correct assessment of the probability that a desire is fulfilled or on ignorance with regard to the desirability of the object of desire. Hope is justified—realistic—when the hoping person knows and accepts experts’ judgement about the probability of hope fulfillment. However, I argued, what matters for evaluating a person’s hope is not only whether it is realistic, but also whether it is reasonable in light of the aim and goals for which the person strives in (the remainder of) his life. Part three was about the question of what is wrong about having or causing false hope. If false hope is a moral problem, having or instilling it should be counteracted. I showed that from a consequentialist perspective, false hope only becomes a moral problem when the negative effects outweigh the positive ones. From a deontological and virtue-ethical point of view, having false hope is morally wrong if the hope is based on culpable ignorance. False hope that does not affect the interests of others is morally permissible but not virtuous. I argued that causing someone to hope falsely is prima facie wrong, and so is not exposing false hope. In the fourth part, I show the relevance of the insights from the previous parts for the debate on false hope in medicine and clinical research. I discussed to what extent physicians are responsible for the false hope of their patients and what they should do when patients cling to their false hope in spite of being properly informed. I showed that a person’s hope that an (experimental) treatment may prolong his or her life or improve the quality of his or her life can only be called false when he or she thinks that the chances of personal benefits are greater than those estimated by experts. If he or she does accept their judgement, continuing to hope is realistic. Hope is moreover reasonable if it contributes to realizing what a person strives for in (the remainder of) his life.
Notes
Examples of twentieth-century thinkers for whom hope was the structural principle of their philosophy or theology are the neo-Marxist philosopher Ernst Bloch (1963), the Protestant theologian Jürgen Moltmann (1964), the phenomenological philosopher Gabriel Marcel (1962), and Catholic philosopher Joseph Pieper (1997). According to Nicholas Smith (2008, 6), “Hope was a matter of ‘first philosophy’ for them; that is, of significance for solving the basic problems (or deciphering the fundamental enigmas) of metaphysics, philosophical anthropology and philosophy of history. For all the interest these thinkers still have for us, it is hard to see how the ‘principle of hope’ can be made plausible in quite such an emphatic fashion today.”
Among them—again—Moltmann, Marcel, and Pieper.
This is Day’s own formulation: “A hopes that p” is true iff “A wishes [i.e., desires] that p, and A thinks that p has some degree of probability, however small” is true (Day, 1969, 89).
According to Downie there are two criteria that are independently necessary and together sufficient for “hope that”: first is that the object of hope must be desired by the hoper . . . The second . . . is that the object of hope falls within a range of physical possibility which includes the improbable but excludes the certain and the merely logically possible (1963, 249). Downie makes a distinction between “hoping that” and “being hopeful that.” For the definition of being hopeful a third criterion is needed: “ . . . a belief that the object of hope is likely to be attained” (1963, 250). That criterion goes beyond the minimum conditions for the probability of hope. 
According to Nicholas Smith, the experience of hope is best described as “ . . . an anticipation of something, in the sense of seizing it in advance and projectively uniting ourselves with an objective of which we are uncertain (and perhaps even unconscious)” (2008, 17).
This is Meirav’s formulation: “More generally to think of an external factor, personal or impersonal, as good is to think of it as operating like someone who, to a substantial degree, can benefit me, wants to benefit me, and knows how to do so” (2009, 232).
Snyder is the (co-)author of numerous articles and books on hope. Here, I refer to Snyder (2002).
In his research Snyder focuses primarily on the differences between people with a lot of hope (“high hope”) and little hope (“low hope”). People with a lot of hope have, for example, more positive emotions than those with little hope, and focus on more targets, also with more attention. Hope is, according to Snyder, first of all a thought process; emotions are secondary. The idea of being successful in achieving one’s goals evokes positive emotions whereas the idea of not attaining one’s goals evokes negative emotions. The probability of achieving goals hardly plays a role in the “hope theory.” Snyder initially thought hope was only relevant when pursuing goals whose implementation was uncertain and less likely. He later dropped that restriction. The reason was that his conversations with “high hope” people made it clear that when working on easy targets they always came up with additional tasks for them- selves, the success of which was uncertain (such as doing something faster or in a more complex way).
See Williams (2013) about the actor relativity of probability thresholds.
Day does not distinguish between realistic and reasonable hope.
See, for a general discussion of the role of hope in health care, Christy Simpson (2004).
William Ruddick (1999) offers an excellent discussion on “hope and deception.”
The “principle of veracity” stems from Sissela Bok who formulates strict conditions for justifying a violation of that principle which she calls the “Scheme of Applied Publicity.” That scheme consists of critical self-examination and consultation with a group of people representative of the general public (Bok, 1978).
References
Appelbaum, P. S., L. H. Roth, and C. W. Lidz. 1982. The therapeutic misconception: in- formed consent in psychiatric research. International Journal of Law and Psychiatry 5(3–4):319–29.
Appelbaum, P. S., L. H. Roth, C. W. Lidz, P. Benson, and W. Winslade. 1987. False hopes and best data: Consent to research and the therapeutic misconception. Hasting Center Report 17(2):20–4.
Baumeister, R. F. 1989. The optimal margin of illusion. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology 64(2):899–922.
Bloch, E. 1963. Das Prinzip Hoffnung. Frankfurt am Main, Germany: Suhrkamp.
Bok, S. 1978. Lying. Moral Choice in Public and Private Life. New York: Pantheon Books.
Bovens, L. 1999. The value of hope. Philosophy and Phenomenological Research 59(3):667–81.
Cox, K. 2002. Informed consent and decision-making: Patients’ experiences of the process of recruitment to phases I and II anti-cancer drug trials. Patient Education and Counseling
46(1):31–8.
Daugherty, C. K., M. J. Ratain, and E. Grochowski. 1995. Perceptions of cancer patients and their physicians involved in phase I trials. Journal of Clinical Oncology 13(9):1062–72.
Day, J. P. 1969. Hope. American Philosophical Quarterly 6(2):89–102.
———. 1991. Hope: A Philosophical Inquiry. Helsinki: Philosophical Society of Finland.
Downie, R. S. 1963. Hope. Philosophy and Phenomenological Research 24(2):248–51.
Groopman, J. 2004. The Anatomy of Hope. How People Prevail in the Face of Illness. New York: Random House Trade Paperbacks.
Hume, D. 1896. A Treatise of Human Nature. Edited by L. A. Selby-Bigge. Oxford, United Kingdom: Clarendon Press.
Joffe, S., E. F. Cook, P. D. Cleary, J. W. Clark, and J. Weeks. 2001. Quality of informed consent in cancer clinical trials: A cross-sectional survey. Lancet 358(9295):1772–7.
Lazarus, R. S. 1999. Hope: An emotion and a vital coping resource against despair. Social Research 66(2):653–78.
Levy, N. 2004. Self-deception and moral responsibility. Ratio 17(3):294–311.
Marcel, G. 1962. Homo Viator: Introduction to a Metaphysic of Hope. Trans. E. Crawford. New York: Harper Torchbooks.
Martin, M. W. 1986. Self-Deception and Morality. Lawrence: University Press of Kansas.
McGeer, V. 2004. The art of good hope. The Annals of the American Academy of Political and Social Science 592(1):100–27.
Meirav, A. 2009. The nature of hope. Ratio 22(2):216–33.
Mele, A. R. 2001. Self-Deception Unmasked. Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press.
Moltmann, J. 1964. Theologie der Hoffnung. München, Germany: Chr. Kaiser.
Pentz, R. D., M. White, R. D. Harvey, Z. L. Farmer, Y. Liu, C. Lewis, O. Dashevskaya,
T. Owonikoko, and F. R. Khuri. 2012. Therapeutic misconception, misestimation and optimism in subjects enrolled in phase I trials. Cancer 118(18):4571–8.
Pettit, P. 2004. Hope and its place in mind. The Annals of the American Academy of Political and Social Science 592(1):152–65.
Pieper, J. 1997. Über die Hoffnung. München, Germany: Kösel.
Polivy, J. 2001. The false hope syndrome: Unrealistic expectations of self-change. International Journal of Obesity 25(1):580–4.
Rand, K. L., and J. S. Cheavens. 2009. Hope theory. In Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology, eds. S. L. Lopez and C. R. Snyder, 323–33. New York: Oxford University Press.
Ratcliffe, M. 2013. What is it to lose hope? Phenomenology and the Cognitive Sciences 12(4):597–614.
Ruddick, W. 1999. Hope and deception. Bioethics 13(3–4):343–57.
Schrank, B., G. Stanghellini, and M. Slade. 2008. Hope in psychiatry. A review of the literature. Acta Psychiatrica Scandinavica 118(6):421–33
Simpson, C. 2004. When hope makes us vulnerable. A discussion of patient-healthcare provider interactions in the context of hope. Bioethics 18(5):428–47.
Smith, N. 2008. Analysing hope. Critical Horizons: A Journal of Philosophy and Social Theory 9(1):5–23.
Snyder, C. R. 2002. Hope theory. Rainbows in the mind. Psychological Inquiry 13(4):249–75.
Snyder, C. R., L. M. Irving, and J. R. Anderson. 1991. Hope and health. In Handbook of Social and Clinical Psychology: The Health Perspective, eds. C. R. Snyder and D. R. Forsyth, 285–305. New York: Pergamon Press.
Snyder, C. R., K. L. Rand, E. A. King, D. B. Feldman, and J. T. Woodward. 2002. False hope. Journal of Clinical Psychology 58(9):1003–22.
Spinoza, B. 1985. Ethics. The Collected Writings of Spinoza, vol. 1. Trans. E. Curley. Princeton: Princeton University Press.
Stengers, I. 2002. Interview. In Hope: New Philosophies for Social Change, ed. M. Zournai, 244–274. Annandale, Australia: Pluto Press.
Waterworth, J. 2004. A Philosophical Analysis of Hope. Basingstoke: Palgrave Macmillan.
Williams, B. 2013. The agent-relative probability threshold of hope. Ratio 26(2):179–95.
1 note · View note
goodvibesatpeace · 5 years
Text
Spirituality: Synchronicity: The Universe's Software Programs
Tumblr media
Considered to be an a-causal connection of two or more psycho-social phenomena, modern interpretations of synchronicity could be seen as the person who checks their phone for a call, only to receive the call immediately upon checking, a Deja-vu including but not limited to information from dreams occurring in waking life, or a seemingly random string of events leading the subject to a specific goal that could not have been achieved had their original plans gone accordingly—and of course any number of other events.
In order to understand these events, it is imperative to understand the postulates of precognitive ability, telepathy, and other forms of extra-sensory perception, as scientists have realistically been trying to make the Mainstream Media aware of ESP’s existence since the early 20th century with minimal success.
Unfortunately the only attention that any scientific studies receive from the press in the fields of parapsychology are the ones that get a good laugh, and the serious scientific analysis is engulfed in the tidal wave of sensory data that creates today’s age of social technology.
However, once people begin to understand the collective unconsciousness as the earth’s magnetic field, and the archetypes as specific primordial frequencies that the mechanics of everyone’s brains are apt to tune into, et cetera, it will be clear to see that ESP is not a matter of “having special powers” but simply more a matter of two human brains communicating with each other in the same way two neurons communicate through synapses.
Moving forward (or backwards), it is important to point out, as always, that humans’ ancient ancestors were well aware of all of these concepts well before Modern Man; which is not very coincidental since Jung was inspired largely in part by eastern mysticism with his psychotherapy.
However, “synchronicity” philosophy can be found in both eastern and western schools of spirituality.
Generally speaking, the eastern synchronicity was considered Taoism, which is a metaphysical school of philosophy that involves asceticism and meditation in order to further understand and perceive the Tao, which is the “universal flowing one-ness” of everything.
In modern terminology, the idea of the Tao can very much be considered a software engine, computing an existence through pre-existing algorithms that can be diligently studied and eventually interpreted.
The interpretation part was much more emphasized in the west, as eastern mysticism tends to shun “conceptualizing”, “assuming”, or “expecting”, but even Taoists attempted to interpret the language of physical phenomena, the definitive collection of their work titled the I Ching in the West, one of the things that Jung was quite fond of in his psychotherapy.
Divination was the ideology of synchronicity in the ancient west, and was not so much secular like a religion or Taoism, but rather was an umbrella category of crude “ancient-science”, like numerology, astrology and other traditional occult practices.
Specifically, divination’s primary postulation was that every personal interaction with the exterior physical world (each physical “effect”, basically) could be considered something similar to a “word” or “phrase” that had latent information within it, whether the subject interpreted it or not.
This same general process is also used in numerology, when the numerical value of alphabetical digits is determined and reduced down to its core value through specific calculation.
In this sense, it could be considered that divination is the acknowledgement of the synonymous nature of waking life and dreaming; meaning that both are perceived as linear experience of the self, and in both, the “outside” world can be considered an effect of a person’s unconscious projection.
In dreams this is obviously a bit more evident, but even in reality a person creates not the physical phenomena itself, but the entire categorical basis of it within their brain, which is clearly unique as a fingerprint compared to anyone else’s interpretation of the phenomena, and thus completely different and unique to the person’s own unconscious.
The Dalai Lama was quoted on the subject saying, “I am open to the guidance of synchronicity, and do not let expectations hinder my path,” and Terence McKenna referred to the quantum frequency spectrum in which synchronicities occur as the “Cosmic Giggle”.
Researcher David Wilcock wrote a book on the subject titled, The Synchronicity Key, and David Icke, Michael Talbot, and Graham Hancock have discussed the subject, among others.
Dr. Michael Persinger and his colleague Todd Murphy have, although not using the term “synchronicity” or any spiritual terminology, released an incredible amount of scientific data revealing the mechanisms that could quite literally describe the realities of Synchronicity and other Jungian concepts.
Even the Police released their album Synchronicity in 1983, which was openly inspired by the Jungian concept, and John Constantine of Vertigo Comics is often seen riding the metaphysical “Synchronicity Highway” (McKenna’s Cosmic Giggle) in order to get a leg up on many of his adventures.
In general the pervasive and unavoidable presence of synchronicity becomes reportedly much more evident under the influence of natural psychedelic drugs, which goes hand in hand with the ancient shamanic traditions surrounding the philosophy.
Setting aside all the esoteric philosophy and ancient tradition, synchronicity is indeed dealing with a frequency spectrum just like everything else, and the main broadcasters into this spectrum within the human body are the brain and the heart.
Ultimately the real tool to this spectrum can be considered a “self-aware consciousness” in general. This however can be quite difficult due to the multiplicity of layers within the brain acknowledged by just about every psychiatrist and psychologist in history, although the definitions vary substantially at times.
The reason for this is the reality that the different sections of the brain can be considered different organs in terms of goals and use, and because of this, humans are bombarded with a woven web of information that is basically a bunch of simple organs communicating biological responses to each other.
This is not to say that human consciousness is just the projection of a bunch of organs—but more to illustrate that the brain is not the pinnacle of intelligence that most people think it to be, and is instead just another organ looking to perform functions.
However, underneath all these functions is an intangible but undeniable core self; whether it be considered a “soul” an “intuition, a “higher self” or simply “enlightenment.”
There are four universal layers of the brain’s projection: We have the Self, the Anima/Animus, the Persona, and the Shadow.
When a person is born, they are physically one sex, so conceptually their consciousness becomes inverted at its root so as to allow the person a piece of the full spectrum; meaning that a woman has the male aspect of the Animus embodying her reason and spirit, and a man has the female aspect of the Anima embodying his sensuality and intimacy.
Some even spiritually characterizing this as a man’s link to his beloved throughout time. The persona is the literal cognitive mask a person paints of themselves for the rest of the world, the Self is the full fractal collection of all within the brain (often represented by a mandala).
The self is also often considered to be the positive spectrum of the whole—the yin, so to speak—which brings us to the fourth layer: the counter-mimicry of the self, the inversion, the Shadow—the yang.
The synthesis of these layers of perception, thoroughly described by Jung in his work and expanded upon by many others, is what a Taoist would call honing his mind to the flow of the Tao, or even what Thoreau emphasized when he spoke of sucking the raw marrow from the bones of life—it is learning to navigate the waves of one’s own mind, because only then will one truly be able to accurately navigate the waves of the world around them.
Of course, the simple definition to all this would be following one’s “intuition”, but unfortunately this is easier said than done.
Most people believe in themselves to such a little extent that making personal decisions is difficult enough, let alone making decisions on the present environment in order to accurately gauge the conditions of the future—in the present.
The only conclusions that can and should be drawn from this are that synchronicity events are a recurring and intimate piece of the human experience. The modern era is so unbelievably chaotic that it’s difficult to tune into anything these days, let alone the programming of the universe.
The translation of the programs of the universe is one’s own intuition; everyone experiences these synchronicities whether they are aware of it or not, similarly to the way that everyone dreams whether they recall or not; and finally, that the existence of synchronicity events further demonstrates the very fine line between waking life and dreaming.
No-Nonsense Naysayers will be inclined like always to chalk these things up to impractical reasoning and gullibility, but those who have experienced these intimate moments with the world around them cannot be swayed, especially since once a synchronicity has been experienced, they usually continue and often even the frequency increases.
Those who have not yet experienced this should take note to study the work of Carl Jung, and the ancient metaphysic philosophy of Taoism—and to a lesser extent the ideology of divination as well.
Although it should again be noted that this was not a brotherhood of diligent thinkers, but rather a definition of something that was emerging in the culture in general, and as a result is a bit more convoluted.
If a person wishes to unveil the programming of the universe, it is not particularly difficult, nor is it unnatural, but it requires a mindset without mental friction.
Although still largely misunderstood/unknown by modern science, Synchronicity Events cannot be denied their existence or their pertinence, and those who continue to remain blind to the universal coding will simply be left behind by the others, as they continue to ride the wave and explore their own nature through the interactive and multi-layered existence around them.
11 notes · View notes
Text
3 Calorie Counting `Secrets` Every Dieter Should Know
Tumblr media
If you're confused concerning counting calories, and also if you simply would like to know what works and exactly what does not, you have to read this article.
For many, fat burning is quite an ordeal-physically, mentally, as well as emotionally.
They attempt all type of silly diet regimens sold by silly 'masters' as well as, in spite of the hundreds of pages read, bucks spent, and grains of sweat compromised, fail to reach their fat burning goals.
I uncommitted exactly how persistent you are-you can just take so much setback prior to you quit. Prior to you conclude that it's simply not implied to be, that you were genetically fated to be fat and the faster you accept it, the faster you can go on with your life.
But after that you'll come throughout proof on the contrary. Proof that weight management could be come close to medically, methodically, and universally, and also that results comply with as an issue of training course, not luck.
The world of body building is a gold mine of such evidence. There you can discover millions of males and females of all ages from all around the world that manipulate body make-up with simplicity, using the very same, basic principles to get muscular tissue as well as shed fat as consistently as they clean their vehicles or cleanse their clothes.
How do these people do it? Lots of medications? Lucky genetics? Hunger? Voodoo?
Sure, dangerous medications, elite genetics, and also extreme diet regimens prevail among bodybuilding competitors that need to reduce body fat to near-deadly lows, yet they're a tiny minority. Look past them and also you'll discover a huge sea of daily people like you as well as me making use of bodybuilding concepts to develop solid, lean, muscle physiques.
And here's something you have to understand ...
The nutritional principles these millions of regular individuals are making use of to develop the lean, muscular bodies of their desires rotate around correct calorie counting.
I know, I know-the fat MD with a PhD, the pretty lady on TELEVISION that has actually been slim her entire life, the previous triathlete turned fitness author that never ever needed to 'diet plan' ... they all state calorie checking is flawed or doesn't work.
Or maybe you've concerned that final thought yourself in your dietary travels (and also woes). Perhaps you have actually tried counting calories and also it was just as futile as everything else.
Well, I have great information for you ... Calorie checking, when used wisely and continually, can transform your life.
As you'll soon see, as soon as you completely recognize the physiological systems underlying weight loss as well as gain-the reasons and effects-you could bring these processes under your control.
And when you do that, you gain freedom from nutritional convictions, trends, beliefs, and scapegoats. You not roam, question, and also wish. You follow easy rules to obtain reliable results.
You can eat foods you like as well as shed fat when you wish to. You can temporarily-and intentionally-gain fat without fear. And also you could maintain your body fat and preserve whatever kind of body you want.
To do all that, nevertheless, you need to know points most people do not concerning how calorie counting jobs, how it could fall short, as well as why it has obtained a bad rap.
So let's get to it.
Calories in versus calories out isn't as easy as you think.
One of the most awful diet plan myths out there is the concept that weight reduction or gain is a 'customized' experience.
That is, the concept that your body and also metabolism is essentially different compared to mine or somebody else's which you have to, via trial and mistake, luck, or divine ideas, uncover just how your own ticks and also ways to bend it to your will.
This approach comfortably overlooks the reality that a century of metabolic research has actually established, past the shadow of a doubt, that the legislations of thermodynamics determine weight management and weight gain.
Scientific fact: you cannot reduce weight without an energy shortage and also you can not acquire it without a surplus.
You see, body fat is an energy book that your body doesn't have to touch right into (as well as consequently reduce) if you're providing all of it the power it requires with food. And your body can not create additional power out of thin air to store as fat-it have to obtain this surplus of energy through food.
These realities are shed on lots of 'professionals' though, that make a killing making instances versus the entire scientific model, declaring that calorie checking is the steed as well as buggy of dieting-obsolete, impracticable, as well as superseded by new clinical research study as well as discoveries.
The reality isn't really that the 'calories in vs. calories out' motto is bunk. The reality is it paints also simple of a picture.
' Calories in' is very easy enough ... in theory.
Food consists of power that we can determine in calories. We consume the food, taking in the energy. Tough to mess that up. Or is it?
Well, there are two major problems that dumbfound easy efforts as well as quantifying 'calories in.'
First, individuals are generally awful at estimating the real amount of calories they eat.
Thin people have the tendency to overstate the quantity of calories they eat (a 'heap' of food to them could mean one big dish per day) and also obese individuals have the tendency to ignore the amount they consume (they ignore all the 'hidden' calories in their beverages and dishes).
Second, the calorie counts we're provided for various restaurant as well as packaged foods are usually inaccurate.
In reality, food manufacturers can underreport calories by 20% as well as pass FDA examination and you 'd much better think numerous are unethical adequate to use this to their advantage.
The internet result is people frequently believe they're absorbing far less calories than they actually are, and this alone can prevent weight-loss when counting calories.
Calculating calories out is even trickier. Much trickier, actually.
The second part of this equation represents the power we use up, which is determined by numerous things:
1. Our basal metabolic rate, which is the amount of power our bodies shed while at rest.
There are easy formulas for establishing your basal metabolic rate (BMR), yet research study reveals real metabolic rates can vary rather a bit. Some individuals's basic metabolic prices are greater and also lower compared to regular (and also than solutions would certainly anticipate).
Weight loss likewise affects BMR. As you lower your weight, your body reduces its complete daily energy expense by naturally relocating much less and also causing its metabolic price to decrease, and this is just one of the reasons that lots of people struck weight management plateaus when counting calories.
2. The thermic effect of food, which is the energy cost of refining the food we consume for use as well as storage.
For example, research shows that entire foods cost more power to process compared to refined foods and also high-protein dishes result in even more power expense compared to high-fat.
Thus, 300 calories of entire foods results in even more 'calories out' compared to 300 calories of refined foods, and high-protein meals greater than low-protein meals. Repeat this numerous times daily as well as the numbers could amount to something significant.
Research also shows that also water can have light thermal effect since your body has to expend energy to heat it, which is just one of the reasons increased water consumption is related to weight loss.
3. The power we expend with all physical movement, consisting of intentional activities like exercise as well as spontaneous tasks like shivering as well as fidgeting, as well as whatever in between.
When lots of people believe energy expense, they think only of focused efforts like workouts. They neglect that all exercise matters, to our practices of strolling around while on the phone or jumping to the washroom or drumming our fingers when we read or bobbing our leg when we think.
The power melted by these activities is referred to as non-exercise task thermogenesis, or NEAT, as well as it plays a much bigger role in total everyday power expense compared to many people recognize. Research reveals that NEAT could vary by up to 2,000 calories per day among many individuals.
The same research suggests that individuals might shed an added 350 calories each day by taking basic activities to increase activity everyday like taking the staircases when feasible, strolling reasonably short distances rather of driving, doing some duties as opposed to watching TELEVISION, etc.
And to put that in perspective, melting an extra 350 calories each day for 7 days would certainly amount to about 2/3 of a pound of fat lost. Not negative for just piddling around a little bit greater than usual.
Another facet of power expenditure that many individuals have no idea is some people's bodies shed more power while energetic than others's.
Just because you're taken part in the very same kinds and also amounts of activity as somebody else does not mean you're melting the exact same quantity of power. This is particularly real if you have basically muscular tissue because muscle significantly enhances the energy expense of exercise.
The science is clear: force individuals to really eat less energy than they expend and they will drop weight. They will not all lose the very same quantities, but they'll all get lighter.
When individuals are unable to reproduce these cause their very own efforts at limiting as well as counting calories it's not since the entire method is essentially flawed as well as ' does not function'- it's since they're doing it wrong.
A calorie isn't a calorie when chatting body composition.
You currently understand that getting and slimming down come down to adjusting energy intake and expense. Consistently take in less power by means of food than you expend by means of your basic metabolic rate as well as physical activity, and your weight will go down.
The foods you consume to obtain in those calories do not matter-a calorie is a calorie in this sense. Professor Mark Haub lost 27 pounds on a diet regimen of healthy protein trembles, Twinkies, Doritos, Oreos, as well as Little Debbie treats, and you can do precisely the same if you desired to.
Yes, that's. 'Clean eating' has its heart in the appropriate place yet guarantees nothing in the method of fat loss.
Eat way too many 'tidy' calories everyday and also you'll cannot shed a solitary pound.
And on the other side, maintain a calorie deficiency eating nothing however Skittles and also GMO wheat all day and also you'll drop weight like clockwork. Is this diet regimen unhealthy and also unsustainable? Obviously. Yet that has absolutely nothing to do with its performance for short-term weight-loss. Therein exists the trouble: weight loss.
That is, you'll shed more than fat. You'll lose muscle too.
You see, your objective shouldn't merely be weight loss-it need to be fat loss. You wish to lose fat and also preserve-or even build-muscle, lest you wind up skinny fat.
And when that's the objective, a calorie is not a calorie. Specific kinds of calories are more vital than others.
The sort of calories that matter the majority of are those that come from protein.
Protein is, without a doubt, the most useful macronutrient when you're limiting your calories to shed weight.
Research reveals that a high-protein diet leads to ...
more weight loss, consisting of abdominal fat particularly,
far far better muscular tissue conservation, and
more satiety, aiding you stay clear of appetite pangs as well as cravings.
Those benefits apply to every person, less active and also energetic, and also routine workout only raises the quantity of healthy protein your body should preserve muscular tissue as well as remain healthy.
And exactly how much healthy protein should you be eating to lose fat and also not muscle mass? You could get the long response in my write-up on just how much healthy protein is had to develop muscle, yet I'll give a short one below:
According to current research performed by scientists at AUT College ...
" Protein requires for energy-restricted resistance-trained professional athletes are most likely 2.3-3.1 g/kg of FFM [1 - 1.4 grams per pound of fat totally free mass] scaled upwards with severity of caloric constraint and leanness."
That is, 2.3 grams each kilogram of body weight, or regarding 1 gram each extra pound, is a good place to start, as well as requires can boost as high as 1.4 grams each extra pound of body weight in the extremely lean as well as active.
Based on my experience aiding thousands of individuals of any ages as well as body kinds shed fat, I have actually established simple standards for establishing healthy protein intake:
1. In the overweight, 1 gram of protein each pound of lean mass is adequate.
2. In the overweight. 0.8 to 1 gram of healthy protein per pound of body weight is adequate.
3. In the lean, 1.2 grams of protein each pound of body weight is adequate.
As facility as weight management is, calories count the most.
There's no denying that the physiological machinery associated with weight loss is labyrinthine. It's driven by the interaction of hundreds of healthy proteins and also enzymes that typically aren't even totally comprehended yet.
Many supplement companies accentuate this intricacy to market you uncertain 'fat burners' that claim to maximize or 'hack' various pieces of the fat loss challenge, and lots of diet plan masters utilize it to market you their bestselling weight-loss 'developments.'
These people speak about controling hormonal agents like insulin, growth hormonal agent, and also testosterone, and not your calorie intake, of utilizing dish timing to maximize different metabolic processes, of 'biking' carbohydrates or calories to make the most of outcomes, therefore forth.
Some of the sales pitches are encouraging. And also let's face it-sometimes we simply want to think there's a less complex means. That it's not our mistake that we can not shed weight.
Well, the earlier you realize the complying with adage, the sooner you can break without the chains of weight reduction lack of knowledge:
Fat loss is a whole-body procedure. By focusing on reducing your power intake listed below your outcome, everything else activates and operates accordingly.
You can not, via diet, workout, or supplements, straight manage the private systems that enable your body to shed fat, but you can conveniently control what does it cost? food you consume and what does it cost? energy you expend and let your body deal with the rest.
The Base Line on Counting Calories
There's a reason that every regulated research study on weight loss carried out in the last 100+ years has wrapped up that energy expenditure must be more than intake for significant weight decrease to occur.
There's a reason bodybuilders have been utilizing this understanding for just as lengthy to methodically increase and minimize body fat degrees as desired.
And there's a reason why 'calorie deniers' reoccured, whisked to popularity through meticulously planned media orgies and after that delegated to obscurity once individuals understand their new brand names of quackery simply do not work.
Calorie checking, when done correctly, jobs. For everybody. Consistently. As well as once you experience it on your own, you'll never look back.
2 notes · View notes
lelliefant · 5 years
Text
Hiddleswift: A Defense in Retrospect
Two-and-a-half years later, I’m still seeing haters on Tumblr trying to trash Tom for this three-month romance. At the time (summer of 2016), I was pretty much silent on Tumblr, but I’m gonna give this argument a go now, as it appears the hate just won’t die.
A lot of people like to believe that Tom and Taylor’s relationship was just for publicity, but if you knew anything about what actually happened, and about Tom’s personality, you'd realize that makes zero sense.
First, I can confidently say that Tom had no motivation to seek out notoriety, but every reason to fall in love. It’s possible that Taylor thought about the prospect of publicity, and it might even have made him more attractive to her, but she hardly needs extra publicity.
Taylor’s known to have had a crush on his Loki character from the Avengers,* which is probably why she arranged to sit next to him at Anna Wintour's party (where they first met) and then again later at the 2016 Met Gala.
Tumblr media
As for Tom, he fell for her like a rock. She is exactly his type; she's an amazing, beautiful, and talented young artist and a smart businesswoman; she pursued him; and he was smitten. He had no reason at the time to look for publicity (nothing to promote), and he has always otherwise avoided that kind of personal notoriety.*
In fact, he strictly avoids sharing his personal life with the Media.* He's never been an overexposed bubblegum pop culture icon; he's always pursued work as a serious, gifted dramatic actor with a lot of indie and theater cred, particularly gifted in Shakespeare.
At Cambridge (where he earned a double-first in Classics) Tom once performed as Orestes in Electra, speaking entirely in Ancient Greek:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-AmRve7EZRE
Tumblr media
When creating Loki, he sourced his characterization on research of Norse mythology and what was familiar to him: Shakespearian characters. He returns to the stage whenever possible, between films.
Last year, he decided to take a year-long break from film. If he only cared about advancing his fame, this was not a good career move. Instead, he participated in a number of charity events, including a run as Hamlet for the tiny RADA theater to raise funds for his alma-mater. Of course, he took no payment.
Tumblr media
Those are not life goals, accomplishments, or qualities that mesh with or demonstrate any interest in drawing the attention of the unwashed masses, or teenaged Taylor fans for that matter.
But what really makes me convinced that it was all real--at least for him--is that it fits perfectly with his personality. This is a guy who jumps headlong into life, especially in love. He is, in a word, enthusiastic. He has said many times that his only fear/regret in life is not living it to the fullest.
https://www.standard.co.uk/showbiz/celebrity-news/tom-hiddleston-admitts-his-biggest-fear-mine-is-regret-looking-back-at-things-i-haven-t-done-a3356611.html
If I made quote the man on this point, "We all have two lives. The second one starts when we realize we only have one."
Tumblr media
And he's also said many times in many ways that he just doesn't see the value in living a fake existence.* A fake, painfully public romance would simply have had no appeal for him, personally or professionally.
But people like to think the worst of others; they think it makes them seem superior, sophisticated, and smart to be cynical.* And nobody would actually be so naïve to believe two famous, beautiful, successful people could actually be genuinely attracted to each other, right?
It’s just a much more profitable story for the Media to frame these two as cold, calculating, self-promoting, deliberate liars who would actually want that type of shallow, populist, Kardashian fame. Even though they had both already earned and achieved a deeper quality of fame based on their genuine talent and professional success and acclaim. And the general public eats that stuff up, without question, because it’s what they want to believe.
All this being said, I know very little about Taylor, personally. I suspect that when she actually got to know Tom, he turned out to be an overwhelming energizer bunny, an overeducated egghead, and a giggly dork, when she had expected a dark, brooding, and mysterious bad boy.
Case in point:
Tom:
Tumblr media
Loki:
Tumblr media
Tom:
Tumblr media
Loki:
Tumblr media
I think Taylor realized her mistake and acted immediately to cut the relationship off, because she is not the type of person to stick around for something she doesn't want. And I think that totally took him by surprise, because he had jumped wholeheartedly into the relationship without a parachute. You might say he was too impetuous for his age but, like I said, that fits with his demonstrated personality traits--whereas the idea that the relationship never meant anything to him clearly does not.
Another relevant quote from Tom (this was prior to their relationship): "I gave myself permission to care, because there are a lot of people in this world who are afraid of caring, or afraid of showing that they care because it's uncool. It's uncool to have passion. It's so much easier to lose when you've shown everyone how much you don't care if you win or lose. It's much harder to lose when you show that you care, but, you'll never win, unless you also stand to lose. Don't be afraid of your passion."
https://www.bustle.com/articles/122067-tom-hiddlestons-best-advice-to-his-fans-to-help-them-live-life-to-the-fullest
“Don’t be afraid of your passion.”
This is the guy I admire. A smart, erudite, accomplished man who hasn't let life beat him down or make him cynical--quite the opposite. This guy thrives on the challenge. He chooses optimism in spite of hardship; almost--weirdly--because of hardship. This deliberate fool is not afraid to risk his heart, and he grabs life with both hands, knowing the risks.
Tumblr media
TL;DR:
Y’all can stop hating on Hiddleswift. It was real, which makes sense if you look at the evidence.
If you scoff and say I’m being naive, I have another one for you: you’re the one naively believing the trash people say and going along with it, trying to be smug and superior.
I don’t know much about her, but I know from Tom, and Tom was (and always strives to be) genuine.
Fame isn’t everything to everyone, especially not to people who already have plenty of it.
If I haven’t made this clear: tabloid noteriety is not the same as fame, much less professional acclaim.
Can we please let it go now?
Relevant Resources
https://www.bustle.com/articles/122067-tom-hiddlestons-best-advice-to-his-fans-to-help-them-live-life-to-the-fullest
https://www.bustle.com/articles/51780-tom-hiddleston-is-making-people-care-about-shakespeare-english-teachers-everywhere-should-rejoice
https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/film/2015/oct/08/tom-hiddleston-interview-crimson-peak
http://www.bbcamerica.com/anglophenia/2015/10/tom-hiddleston-your-comfort-zones-what-youre-frightened-of
https://www.standard.co.uk/showbiz/celebrity-news/tom-hiddleston-admitts-his-biggest-fear-mine-is-regret-looking-back-at-things-i-haven-t-done-a3356611.html
*Note: For some d@mn reason, Tumblr is not letting me include very many links in this post (the draft won’t save when I add them). I have a number of additional specific resources in support of the statements in this post. Additional sources are available upon request.
16 notes · View notes
ecoamerica · 2 months
Text
youtube
Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared
The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!
16K notes · View notes
Text
On-Page SEO for 2019 - Whiteboard Friday
Posted by BritneyMuller
Whew! We made it through another year, and it seems like we're past due for taking a close look at the health of our on-page SEO practices. What better way to hit the ground running than with a checklist? In today's Whiteboard Friday, the fabulous Britney Muller shares her best tips for doing effective on-page SEO in 2019.
Tumblr media
Click on the whiteboard image above to open a high-resolution version in a new tab!
Video Transcription
Hey, Moz fans. Welcome to another edition of Whiteboard Friday. Today we're going over all things on-page SEO, and I've divided it into three different sections:
How are crawlers and Googlebot crawling through your site and your web pages?
What is the UX of your on-page content?
What is the value in the content of your on-page content?
So let's just jump right in, shall we?
Crawler/bot-accessible
☑ Meta robots tag allows crawling
Making sure your meta robots tag allows crawling is essential. If that's blocking Googlebot from crawling, your page will never be in search. You want to make sure that's all panned out.
☑ Robots.txt doesn't disallow crawling
You want to make sure that let's say this page that you're trying to get to rank in search engines, that you're not disallowing this URL from your robots.txt.
☑ URL is included in sitemap
Similarly you want to make sure that the URL is in your site map.
☑ Schema markup
You also want to add any schema markup, any relevant schema markup that you can. This is essentially spoon-feeding search engines what your page is about and what your content is about.
☑ Internal links pointing to your page with natural anchor text
So let's say I am trying to rank for chakra stones. Maybe I'm on a yoga website and I want to make sure that I have other internal pages linking to chakra stones with the anchor text "chakra crystals" or "chakra stones" and making sure that I'm showing Google that this is indeed an internally linked page and it's important and we want to give it some weight.
☑ HTTPS - SSL
You want to make sure that that is secure and that Google is taking that into consideration as well.
User experience
☑ Meets Web Content Accessibility Guidelines
Does it meet Web Content Accessibility Guidelines? Definitely look into that and make sure you check all the boxes.
☑ Responsive mobile design with same content and links
Is it responsive for mobile? Super important with the mobile-first indexing.
☑ Clear CTA
Is there one clear call to action? A lot of pages miss this. So, for this page, maybe I would have a big "Buy Chakra Crystals Here" button or link. That would be a clear CTA. It's important to have.
☑ Multimedia: Evaluate SERP and add desired media
Are you providing other desired media types? Are there images and video and different forms of content on your page?
☑ Page speed: utilize CDNs, compress images, use reliable hosting
Are you checking the page speed? Are you using CDNs? Are you compressing your images? You want to check all of that.
☑ Integrate social sharing buttons
It's the easiest thing. Make sure that people can easily share your content.
Content and value
This is where it gets really fun and strategic too.
☑ Unique, high-quality content
Are you providing high-quality content? So if you go to Google and you search "chakra stones" and you take a look at all of those results, are you including all of that good content into your page? Then are you making it even better? Because that should be the goal.
☑ Optimize for intent: Evaluate SERP and PPC, note which SERP features show up
You want to also optimize for intent. So you want to evaluate that SERP. If that search result page is showing tons of images or maybe videos, you should be incorporating that into your page as well, because clearly that's what people are looking for.
You also want to evaluate the PPC. They have done so much testing on what converts and what doesn't. So it's silly not to take that into consideration when optimizing your page.
☑ Title tags and meta descriptions
What are those titles? What are those descriptions? What's working? Title tags and meta description are still so important. This is the first impression to many of your visitors in Google. Are you enticing a click? Are you making that an enticing call to action to your site?
☑ Header tags
H1, H2, and H3 header tags are still super important. You want to make sure that the title of your page is the H1 and so forth. But just to check on all of that would be good.
☑ Optimize images: compress, title file names, add alt text
Images are the biggest source of bloat of on-page site speed. So you want to make sure that your images are compressed and optimized and keeping your page fast and easily accessible to your users.
☑ Review for freshness
You want to review for freshness. We want to make sure that this is up-to-date content. Maybe take a look at popular content the last year or two of your site and update that stuff. This should be a continual wash and repeat. You want to continue to update the content on your site.
☑ Include commonly asked questions
It's such an easy thing to do, but it's commonly overlooked. AnswerThePublic does a great job of surfacing questions. Moz Keyword Explorer has a really great filter that provides some of the most commonly asked questions for a keyword term. I highly suggest you check that out and start to incorporate some of that.
Find common questions now
These help to target featured snippets. So if you're incorporating some of that, not only do you get the extra traffic, but you find these opportunities of getting featured snippets, which is great. You're expanding your real estate in search. Awesome. PAA boxes are also a great way to find commonly asked questions for a particular keyword.
☑ Add summaries
Summaries are also hidden gems. We see Google seeking out summaries for content all of the time. They are providing summaries in featured snippets and in different SERP features to help sort of distill information for users. So if you can do that, not only will you make your content more easily scannable, but you're also making it more accessible for search, which is great.
☑ TF-IDF (term frequency-inverse document frequency)
TF-IDF stands for "term frequency-inverse document frequency." It sounds a little intimidating. It's actually pretty simple. What's the number of times that "chakra stones" is mentioned in this particular page divided by the number of times it's mentioned anywhere? This is basically just a calculation to determine relevance for the term "chakra stones." Really cool and commonly used by Google. So if you can do this on your on-page, it will just help you in the long term.
☑ LSI (latent semantic indexing) for relevance
Similarly LSI or LSA, it sometimes referred to, is latent semantic indexing, and it's also for relevance. This helps determine, okay, if I'm talking about chakra stones, it may also incorporate those other topics that are commonly related to this topic. Relevant.
☑ Flesch-Kincaid Readability Test
What is the readability of this page? The easier it is to read the better, but you just want to keep an eye on that in general.
Bonus tip!
One final tip that Kameron Jenkins put on Twitter, that I love so much, and Kameron is a world-class writer -she's one of the best I've ever had the privilege of working with - mentioned this on-page SEO trick. Find the top three ranking URLs for your target keyword.
KW research tip 1. Search your target kw & pull the top 3 ranking URLs 2. Compare URLs in @Moz KWE 3. Click on the areas of most overlap 4. See KWs that top-ranking URLs for target KW also rank for 5. Use ideas to optimize your own page! pic.twitter.com/FxJjOxn7DJ - Kameron Jenkins (@Kammie_Jenkins) November 7, 2018
So if I were to put in "chakra stones" in Google and pull the top three URLs, put them into Moz Keyword Explorer and I see what they're ranking for, I see what those three URLs are specifically ranking for, and I look at what they're commonly ranking for in the middle here. Then I use those keywords to optimize my page even better. It's genius. It's very similar to some of the relevant stuff we were talking about over here.
Discover new keyword ideas
So definitely try some of this stuff out. I hope this helps. I really look forward to any of your comments or questions down below in the comments section.
Thank you so much for joining me on this edition of Whiteboard Friday. I look forward to seeing you all again soon, so thanks. Have a good one.
Video transcription by Speechpad.com
Sign up for The Moz Top 10, a semimonthly mailer updating you on the top ten hottest pieces of SEO news, tips, and rad links uncovered by the Moz team. Think of it as your exclusive digest of stuff you don't have time to hunt down but want to read!
3 notes · View notes
sakurauchiha2018 · 6 years
Text
A Little Faith
Here’s the first update of the week! Thank you to everyone that has left positive feedback, it means a lot and it makes my heart happy. This chapter may be a little longer than the last. I got carried away *scratches back of head*
Chapter 1
Monday morning comes too quickly and I find myself scurrying around my bedroom trying to find the appropriate outfit for my first day. Part of me is tempted to ask my mother for help but knowing her I’d be stuck in another dress. Huffing I pull out a pair of dress pants and a flowing white shirt, this is the best I can come up with running on minimal sleep. Last night I finished getting the hospital numbers together. It’s just one last thing to worry about before my meeting on Friday.
My shoulder length hair curls softly at the ends as I inspect myself in the mirror. I’ve never been one for personal appearance but for the first time I feel self-conscious about myself. Impressing my father isn’t my main concern, I just want my employees to see me as a professional instead of a young kid. Rolling my eyes I grab my heavy purse and make my way down the stairs, the weather outside seems beautiful as the sun comes pouring into the entryway. My mother smiles up at me and all nerves go out the window.
“Here’s your folders, I have an important appointment but once I’m finished I’ll be there for the meeting. Your father already left, but we have a gift for you.” She pulls a small box from the pocket of her dress pants and I furrow my brows in confusion. They’ve already named me Vice President, what else could they give me? My hand shakes as I open the lid to see a key fob with a small ribbon tied to it. As the realization hits me, my heart begins to beat faster and I can’t help the childish smile that forms on my face.
“It’s parked out front. You’ve earned it Sarada, now hurry or you’ll be late for your first day.” Crushing my mother in a tight embrace before I run outside to see the new gift. Uncle Itachi, Papa and I went to a car show not too long ago where they introduced the new R8 and the way all three of our eyes lit up was priceless. It feels like Christmas as I open the door to sit on the soft fabric. My contacts are already displayed on the screen, a squeal of delight fills the car. The engine roars as I exit the long driveway and make my way into the heart of downtown.
Pulling into the parking garage I see my name painted on the wall beside my father’s, heat rushes to my cheeks as I put the car into park. On either side of Papa’s spot is mine and my mother’s but that’s not what causes me to blush. It seems Papa decided to get himself a new present as well, while my car is a deep red he’s opted for the pure black model, typical Papa. Scooping all of my items into my arms I make my way to the elevator in a rush, Mama was right I’m almost late on my first day.
I spent too much time this weekend working on a new concept for our company and trying to find ways to improve our numbers. Talking with Mitsuki really did help and I was able to come up with a decent plan but I have to have full support of the others before it goes into motion. I watch as the numbers count up with each passing floor, my heart hammering in my chest. I’ve been to this building so many times but those were nothing compared to this. Almost all of the staff know who I am but as their boss’s little girl. The machine stops moving and I suck in a deep breath, at least this floor is reserved for the CEO and the VP’s so there won’t be too many eyes on me.
Straightening my back, I walk out with a little more confidence than I should and I’m face to face with my father. A huge smirk is on his face but it slowly fades into nothing as I follow behind him. I look around and don’t see anyone else in their offices, it seems it’s only my father and I for the time being.
“This is your office and you need to start looking into a personal assistant. Our first meeting is at 10:15 sharp.” This is a side of my father that I’ll have to get used to. Yes at home he’s stern and strict on promptness but he’s never used this tone before. A shiver runs through my spine as I nod slightly before I’m locked in my office. The walls are bare and the only objects occupying the large space is a white wooden desk with a matching bookcase, two chairs and a center table between them. I’ll have to have help getting this organized the way I want. Dropping my folders and purse on the desk I lean back and take everything in.
Papa’s words echo through my mind, find a personal assistant. An idea pops into my head and I fumble through my purse to find my phone. Dialing the number quickly I nervously wait for the other end to answer.
“About time you called me Sarada!” The voice scolds me but I can’t help but laugh at the childish tone.
“Sorry Cho-Cho it’s been a crazy weekend. Are you still looking for a job?” I remember her saying that she was trying to find a desk job, this would be perfect. After all she’s my best female friend and we work well together.
“Huh? Yeah why?” Perfect! Giggling into the phone I can just imagine her annoyed face.
“It’s a long story but can you be at the Uchiha Corp. building tomorrow at eight sharp? Be sure to dress properly.”
“I always dress properly! I’ll be there. Tell Mr. Sasuke that I said hello.”The phone clicks and I place the device down. Since our meeting is almost two hours away I make an escape from my office and run into Uncle Itachi, who seems to have overslept this morning by the looks of his eyes. Politely nodding at him he ruffles my hair and instantly my cheeks redden at the affection. Patting my hair down to an acceptable manner I nudge him with my elbow.
“Will you walk with me to the research floor?” The question comes out timid. I need to meet with my employees soon so we can begin the assignment due at the end of the week. The door next to mine opens revealing my father tightening the red tie.
“I’ll go with you. There are a few things I need to take care of.” Itachi motions for me to follow my Papa and at first I’m reluctant to follow but I need to learn to work under my father. Inside of this building we aren’t father and daughter, we are coworkers working towards a common goal which is the success of our company. The short ride to the research devision is silent and the air around us is thick with unspoken words. My body aches for me to voice my idea but I know that everyone will need to be informed on the execution if it’s to work properly.
“Follow me.” Doing as I’m told, we exit the elevator and my eyes go wide. In the center of the floor is a computer hub with at least 15 people working on different projects. On the north side of the room are conference rooms that are no doubt filled with more employees and technology. But what really grabs my attention in the white boards lining the west side, they are filled with numbers and prediction equations that make my heart flutter. During college rooms like these were my bread and butter, I can work numbers the way my mother heals broken bones.
“May I have everyone’s attention.” My father announces as we move into the center hub, all eyes are on us and I feel myself shake at the attention.
“As you know, I’ve taken over as CEO of Uchiha Corporation. With that there has been some restructuring as well, my absence left an opening for Vice President of Research and Development. After weeks of consideration we’ve decided to fill the position with someone well qualified. Sarada Uchiha will be the acting VP over this division, any questions will be directed to her. Also, there is a new assignment that is due by the end of the week.” My father finishes his speech and walks over to another man that doesn’t seem much older than I am. Clearing my throat I’m approached by two men, a skeptical look on their faces only irritate me more but at least I know one of them.
“Mr. Nara, it’s so nice to see you. I thought you were Naruto’s advisor.” The merger just took effect so why is he already here? We haven’t decided which areas to cut.
“Same to you Ms. Uchiha, I am but I figured I might as well get the tour. Sasuke told me last night that you would be overseeing this area, congrats it’s a tough job.” His words are kind but I also feel weight added to my shoulders.
“What is Shikadai up to these days? I haven’t heard from him since finals.” It’s a lie, just two nights ago I was out with him. I just want something to fill the awkwardness between us, I watch as his brows raise before a laughter comes from him.
“Still lazy, but he gets it honestly. It was nice catching up but I really should be going. Naruto will be arriving in a little.” Excusing himself, I’m left alone in the hub. I push against the rim of my glasses and lean further in so I can see the small numbers displayed on the large screen. A shiver of joy runs through my body as I see the positive numbers, good we’re off to an amazing start.
“Sarada, meet Konohamaru. He will be the project manager for this entire floor. Any new projects will be sent to him and he will ensure they are being conducted.” It takes me a moment to recognize him, he’s a few years older than me and I’ve seen him around the building during my summers of interning here. I offer him a kind smile as I shake his hand.
“There’s a project that I need done by the end of day Thursday. Do you think they can handle it?” Wiggling my brows at him, I place on hand on my hip as I observe him. He seems to be radiating with confidence but he also seems to be a kind person just by aura.
“These researchers are the best of the best. Whatever you need, you’ll get it.” There’s a tint of cockiness in his voice and I see my father’s features falter for just a moment and give me the ‘Did you really ask that’ look.
“I want the entire break down on Uzumaki Technology, as well as Leaf General, Suna General and the Children’s Clinic. With each I want two calculations, take out five investors out of the equation for one and for the other leave it as is. It’s due by five pm on Thursday.” I let my cockiness get the better of me as I let my instructions come out. If these guys are the best then this should be nothing for them, even if I already have most of the medical divisions numbers. By the look of my father’s face, he’s surprised at my boldness.
“Consider it done Ms. Uchiha. I’ll need to gain access to each company’s database.” Oh I forgot about that but we should be able to gain access easily.
“Already taken care of. The information is being downloaded as we speak.” Papa says cooly before making his exit from the conversation, no doubt making his way back to his office. I still have an hour before I need to return to grab my notes, might as well walk around and see what they are working with.
Konohamaru takes his leave as well and I’m left staring at the hub once again. For the first time in a long time I feel like I belong, making my way over to the white boards I see how detailed and accurate they are. Hn, they may just be the best of the best which I’ll need to pull off my idea.
I wave goodbye to Konohamaru as I make my way to the elevator, after a long discussion over the details I’m already mentally exhausted but now I have a meeting. This will be my first big step out of my comfort zone. How do I address my parents? Should I just wait to see how they all speak to each other first? So many questions run through my head I don’t even notice the doors open and I’m already back to the top floor. Now there’s a receptionist sitting at the large desk, a scowl on her face and I can’t help but return the gesture. No doubt she’s another one of my father’s fan girls. Opening my office I can’t help but gasp when I see my mother placing flowers on my desk.
“Oh hi Mama, I mean…this is harder than I thought.” She giggles at my childish antics and I can’t help but feel embarrassed. She’s changed into an outfit similar to mine except now she’s wearing bright red heels.
“We need to decorate and your Aunt Ino says hello. What’s harder than you thought?” A questioning look shines in her eyes. Might as well get it off my chest, she may be able to help me.
“I’ve never had to be professional with any of you. How do I address everyone? I can’t call my CEO Papa during a business meeting.” The rant leaves me breathless and flustered. All morning I’ve been trying to get grounded to handle this meeting, I even woke up an hour early because of my nerves. Laughter echoes through my office and tears are forming in my mother’s eyes.
“Sarada, if you call your father anything other than Papa or father he will have a heart attack. He may seem up tight today but he’s just as nervous as you are. To us, you’re still our little girl in pigtails running through the house.  Just refer to Naruto and Itachi by their names, as for me I really don’t care if you call me Mama or Sakura.” Her smile instantly soothes me and her words make my heart swell. Deep down I’ve always been a daddy’s girl, we have a special bond. One that’s different than the one I have with my mother. I love them just as much but I’ve always craved his approval more.
“Thanks Mama.” Her smile shifts into a playful one as she offers me my laptop, files and phone. A puzzled look for a over my face as I take the items.
“Rule number one, always be at the meeting before your father.” She straightens her hair down flat and takes the lead carrying a large briefcase. My mother didn’t raise me to be intimidated, not even by my own father. Following her lead, I look over my phone and see a few missed text.
‘Boruto- Good luck today! See you at lunch.’ He can be sweet when he really tries. Boruto has idolized my father since we were children, always wanting to be just like him. Maybe I can convince Papa to let Boruto intern here or have an entry level job.
‘Uncle Itachi- Don’t let your father intimidate you. You’re more than qualified for this. See you in the meeting.’
My uncle’s words help and I enter the large room right behind my mother. Our seats are marked by name plates, looks like I get to sit next to Uncle Naruto today. At least he can have a little fun during these meetings, I’ve heard stories that he likes to go off topic just to make my father frustrated. A woman with bright red hair comes walking out and looks over my mother with disgust. My father’s personal assistant has been a nuisance for as long as I can remember, I wish my father would get rid of her already.
“I was sent to see if either of you wanted coffee.” She all but scoffs at my mother. Her eyes haven’t even bothered to turn and inspect me.
“Thank you Karin. I think we are both fine for now.” My mothers sweet tone has a dangerous hint to it. I’ve heard her use the same tone towards Uncle Naruto before she decked him square in the jaw for being an idiot. Smirking I watch as she exits the room mumbling about ungrateful woman and other obscene words. Tapping my fingers across the dark wood I hear the door open again and in come the three men. Before my father makes his way to the head of the table, he stops at my mother and places a kiss on the top of her head. A deep blush sets across both of our faces, these moments were rare and each time I witness them I can feel the love between them.
“Thank you for the gift Anata, you didn’t have to.” She whispers as he walks away. It’s my fathers turn to smirk at her bashfulness.
“I wanted to Tsuma. Only the best for my girls. Now let’s begin.” It seems that my mother has a new vehicle as well. Rolling my eyes at my father’s words, I open the folder in front of me. It seems they’ve already been working on a way to restructure without cutting too many jobs. It says that the Uzumaki building will be sold and this building is going to undergo remodeling to accommodate the new capacity.
“As you can see there have been decisions already made, Naruto and I agreed to buy the building next door and have the two connected via bridges. The designs are in the back of the folders.” My father takes a sip of his coffee and I see Mama quickly flip through to look at the details.
“It seems that you two have outdone yourselves again. When will the construction be finished?” Mama can’t help but laugh at their impulsive decision, but yet again these are the top two on charge.
“It should be done in six months, for now all of my employees will be working from home and coming into the office only when needed.” Naruto grins while he speaks, I cut my eyes to the side to see a large grin. Even in a business meeting he can’t be serious. All of my worry was for nothing.
“We still need to consider our potential losses and gains with this merger.” Itachi voices his concern and I can’t help but clear my throat.
“I’ve been thinking about that this weekend. Now I don’t have all the numbers at this moment but I do have the Medical Branches. Looking at the numbers, we can stand to lose Danzo as an investor.” With each passing word I feel myself grow more confident and I take pride in the research that I’ve already done.
“How so Sarada?” My full attention turns towards my father and there’s a ghost of a smirk at the corner of his lips, it’s now or never.
“If we were to allow more intern positions in the hospitals and clinic then we could gain more exposure to possible residents. I’ve spoken with a waiting intern and his father, they would gladly pick up any slack we were to lose from cutting out Danzo. They just want us to be able to expand the educational department in each facility.” The other night when I met with Mitsuki I spoke with him on the status on his internship. We’ve known Mitsuki since grade school and my mother worked alongside his father in her studies, as well as Grandma Tsunade. The silence in the room is nerve racking as I look at my father’s stern face. Too afraid to tear my eyes off of him, my heart is hammering in my chest and I want nothing more than to take back everything I just said.
“Who is this intern and father?” I hear my mother ask and I turn to look at her, a glint of interest is in her eyes. Swallowing roughly, I clear my head.
“Mitsuki is currently on the waiting list. Orochimaru and I spoke this weekend, he’s a supporter of your hospitals. I even spoke with Tsunade too, both have agreed to support the decision.” Grandma Tsunade is the one who taught Mama everything she knows, she’s practically my third grandmother and I adore her. Orochimaru is a little out there but his medical knowledge is amazing. It’s almost like he’s a walking textbook.
“Hn. When will you have all the numbers ready?” My head whips over to my father and his trademark smirk is plastered on his lips.
“Friday morning.”
“We’ll make a decision then but it sounds like a solid plan. Sakura what do you think?” All eyes are on my mother who seems to be deep in thought with the suggestion.
“I’ll need to think about it and personally speak with Tsunade and Orochimaru. Our internship program does need to grow so we can educate the next generation that will work in our hospitals.” They all seem to be on board with my idea, good. My body relaxes into the chair and I hear Naruto laugh beside me.
“It seems we’re done for the day. I don’t think Sarada can handle any more intensity.” I glare over to my uncle, but he’s right. For now I just want to hide in my office or go eat with my distracting boyfriend. A chuckle comes from the eldest Uchiha and I relax even more.
“Till Friday.” Uncle Naruto jumps from his seat and rushes out of the room with his phone, probably calling Aunt Hinata. Another blur of blonde enters the room and I see Boruto take his father’s seat. For the first time ever he’s early for something. My mother stands from her seat and is gently escorted out by my father, his hand planted firmly on the small of her back. Another rare moment.
“Seems like everything went well. What would you like for lunch?” He chuckles before planting a sweet kiss on my cheek. Heat flushes my face, every fiber of my being hopes that Papa wasn’t able to see the small display of affection. Thank goodness he’s already gone.
“Let’s go to the café across the street.” I lean in and smack my lips against him before making my escape from the room. Laughing as I cross the tiled floor, clicks of my heels echo and I see the other’s watching us from Papa’s office. All of them have a heartwarming smile on their lips.
As the elevator doors close, my phone buzzes in my hand.
‘Papa- Good job today.’
“Told you. You worry for no reason.” An elbow jabs me in the ribs softly and I push back with slightly more force. A stupid smile is on my face as we exit through the main lobby of the building. Before we can exit through the doors, his hand stops me and I can’t help but look at his blue eyes.
“You know I love you right?” The blush on my cheeks just gets darker and I can’t help but push my glasses up in nervousness. He always says things just to fluster me. I push him slightly and make my break for the door.
“Yeah, yeah…I love you too.” Giggling as we exit into the busy street, I never let go of his hand. I can’t believe he just told he loved me for the first time in the lobby of my job, he can be an idiot sometimes. But I guess he’s my idiot.
Once again, I’m dedicating this story to @kairi-chan! 
66 notes · View notes