#harry would totally do that

[crimsonlovebartylus]

Barty and Sirius hanging out:

Regulus: I don't like this. *crossing his arms*

Remus: I don't either. *crossing their arms*

Regulus: ask him out already before he takes away my boyfriend.

Remus: wh-.. what? first of all, in order for barty to be your boyfriend, you need to ask him out.

Regulus: *waves them off* ask my brother out, i'll ask barty out.

Remus; you first.

Regulus: no you.

Sirius across the room: *whispers* is it working?

Barty: I think so, if we kiss would it speed up the process?

Sirius: maybe, should we?

Barty:

Sirius:

Barty: maybe?

Sirius: okay.. *leans forward to kiss Barty, when hes yank back* REGULUS OUCH?

Regulus: DONT KISS MY BOYFRIEND

REMUS: DONT KISS MY BOYFRIEND

Barty and Sirius looks at each other: it worked

#barty and sirius plotting to speed up the asking out/boyfriend process by making them jealous #sirius x barty #would totally do this shit #wolfstar #bartylus #regulus black #barty crouch jr #the marauders #harry potter #sirius black #remus lupin #i'm hahahaing

[p1nkva1entina]

I can confirm this happened, I was the like and retweet button

#harry potter #draco malfoy #drarry #twitter au #canon #this totally happened #or #this would be something theyd do

[cryptiduni]

“white mourning.”

#‘‘A white mourning. A modern death. Divorce or something similar. All you can do is put more distance between you & him. make him smaller.’’ #jean is a very easy character to hate if you know nothing about him. & you know what they say. easy target doesn’t make for a good practice #judit literally compares harry to intellectually disabled man yet you don’t see ppl hating her because she is outwardly nice. #she’s polite yes but she doesn’t care as much as jean cares for harry #he is not perfect. he is mean. but loyal. if he truly didn't care he wouldn't hab come back to martinaise & coulda just reported harry’s as #he put up with du bois’ bullshit for years and built a toxic (totally straight) relationship with him yet always comes back. #he says he will leave you in the village to die but please understand harry isn't exactly a great person. especially pre-bender hdb. #planned a make up joke & put on a wig for hdb even tho he wasn’t the who started the whole fiasco #you can hate him all you want for leaving harry before & during tribunal but how could he have foreseen all this bullshit would have happen #his second leaving is kinda bullshit writing but #jv is dealing with his own demons too. clinical depression. partner almost died. job is shit. case spiraling out control #i do not blame the DE staff either. sometimes shit just happens. not everything needs a grand explanation. #but it definitely coulda been handled better. but i understand. resources were sparse. #i relate to ​jv. as someone with temper issues & attention problems i have to remove myself from the scene or i'll say shit i'd regret late #my man is having the worst week of his life. leave him alone. #kim is great but have u heard of a man who thinks he's old when he is only 30 & luvs horses & his commie boyfriend that he's divorcin' soon #disco elysium #de fanart #jean vicquemare #disco elysium fanart #jean heron vicquemare #jean posting #illustration #de #artists on tumblr #my art #I WANTED TO DRAW THIS FOR MONTHSSS YOU COULDN'T IMAGINE. HE LITERALLY HAUNTED ME IN MY SLEEP!!! #i love him normal amount. very healthy. much feelings #my little maiu maiu

[grimalkinmessor]

So tired of all the fics that have Harry enjoy reading but it turns him into a snobby cynical asshole. Like reading would turn him into a different person completely. Shut the hell up maybe I just want to see him gushing over the latest fantasy series he stole from the nearest library and going absolutely fangirl insane when he sees a dragon for the first time, all while simultaneously backing as far away from his textbooks as possible and charging headfirst into a fight with a basilisk without researching a damn thing about it. LET HIM CONTINUE TO BE AN IMPULSIVE DUMBASS PLEASE I JUST WANTED HIM TO HAVE SOME COMFORT IN THE CUPBOARD LIKE DAMN 😭

#harry potter #harry james potter #harrymort #literally crying #reading is a form of escapism and i think harry wouldve loved it as a child who was banned from speaking about magic at all #but reading The Hobbit and devouring textbooks are two totally different things #and yes he could go the route of hermione by diving into magic itself as a form of realized escapism #but also. no. its harry potter. the magical world very rapidly becomes just as much of a stressor as the muggle one to him #and i think that would very much affect his desire to read about magic #he moves on to scifi after his second year #dystopias ✨ #let him continue to be a rash and bold and explosively cunning and avoidant of work plz #the kid has adhd and problems with authority the moment you tell him to do something hes not gonna #adding the harrymort tag as a rent lowering gunshot dont follow me for gen hp stuff your not gonna find it #as it is i barely post ship stuff #babes from the phantom and the potter not included yall are fine i love you

[beans-core]

Need more content of Remus being all wolfy near the full moon — but not like a “snappy, protective, always in pain” type of wolfy. That’s amazing and angsty and I’m all for it. But also hear me out.

More of “I just growled at a cat on instinct but I’m pretty sure it was McGonagall what do I do”

“I almost just howled during a lecture because I heard something else howl from in the forest, it was so embarrassing please put me out of my misery”

“Moony wants me to pee on that tree but I absolutely will not and now I have a headache existence is hell”

“I need to chew on something like right now but my fingernails are pleading for mercy”

“The excuse for why I shook off the water like a wet dog and didn’t do a drying spell is that I forgot, okay?”

Basically, the small things that are still annoying and embarrassing, but not as bad as “I’ve got lots of deep scarring and chronic pain :(” because there’s probably more to being a werewolf than just the downright awful bits, right?

#do you see my vision #I have a whole google doc full of little wolfy mannerisms I think he would have near the full moon #i am so normal about him i swear #remus lupin #remus john lupin #would totally write all about it rn but I’m in a writing slump :( #marauders #marauders era #moony #harry potter

[jlhynde-insanitybrilliance]

UDLTTOM DIALOGUE DRAFT #61

Tom (talking to Abraxas): Thank you, Alfred.

~later~

Harry (to Tom): Alfred? Now we all know you know his name isn’t Alfred.

Tom: He was getting too comfortable. When people get too comfortable with me it’s better to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don’t really care about them.

Harry (frowning): You’ve got issues, Tamsyn.

Tom: 👁️ 👄 👁️

…Tamsyn?

Harry: Oh sorry, do you prefer Tammy?

Tom (smiling): I do not, Henrietta.

Harry (arches brow): Henrietta?

Tom: Oh apologies, do you prefer Harriet?

Harry: I prefer that you don’t address me at all—

Tom: Fine by me. I’d much rather undress you.

Harry: 👁️ 👄 👁️

… (to himself) That was pretty smooth…gonna have to remember to use that line on Ginny.

#udlttom #harry potter #tomarry #time travel au #tom riddle #tomarry fanfic #dialogue draft #parks and rec reference #Tom would totally do this btw

[feralboo-the-weirdo]

I think my favorite trope in middle grade books is how firmly the narrator manages to convince themselves they're going to have a "normal" anything. (vacation, walk, school year, etc)

Like it's definitely not healthy in any way, but I admire their total commitment to it. like, bud. did you see the cover of this book? the MC tries so hard to have the major plot point not happen so hard, and they never succeed.

feel free to add if you know of more books/MC's that do this, I made a list in the tags, but it's kinda short.

#cough #emily windsnap #keeper of the lost cities #philippa fisher #middle grade books #I was rereading some of the classics #I was also bored #loved these books as a kid #still do #like bro it's not healthy how they gaslight themselves #especially Emily #girl needs to see a therapist #luckily Sophie was convinced pretty quickly her life would not be normal. she still needs a therapist though... #it's just so funny #because you know #the second they say “this will be a totally normal adventure--I mean vacation/school year” #it won't be #pretty sure Percy Jackson does this? #Percy Jackson #Harry Potter also does this

[kingsmint]

No thoughts just a scenario where Harry Hart dances with a villain but it’s an up beat song and the song/fight is just a bunch of twirls and kicks and blocks

#totally not listening to spice up your life by the spice girls #no but like oh my god he would so do that #he’d be so cunty #like what #kingsman #harry hart #mint thoughts

[thompsborn]

parksborn au where harry is a prince. that’s it. i’m not awake enough to think of anything else but harry is a prince and somehow him and peter become best friends as kids and grow up constantly aware of each other and the struggles they face but their struggles are completely opposite from each other’s and and. and. and.

#parksborn #thinking of like. like 8 year old prince harry sneaking off during an event and meeting stuck in poverty peter parker #recently orphaned living with his aunt and uncle but sneaking out at night to explore or something or just to do something because he hasnt #been able to sleep much since losing his parents #and harry is like imma be honest i have no clue where i am #and peter is like ur literally the prince?? this is your kingdom???? #and harry is like yeah but also i have left the palace grounds a total of 17 times #and peter is like ok well there’s a litter of puppies being raised by the street dog i’ve taken care of since i was 5. wanna meet them #i said im too tired to think of more and then i thought of more #and now it is the only thing i can think of #god the way i would be writing this right this second if i wasn’t literally half asleep currently

[sitp-recs]

Draco takes him somewhere, drags him away from the job Harry loves ("Hold on—just one more lesson to plan." "Darling, it's one day." "It's werewolves, Draco, I have to get it right!") and they portkey to India to visit relatives Draco painstakingly tracked down. When they get there, Harry's overwhelmed with stories about his grandparents and cousins and his family tells him that he is welcome back, anytime. Harry is stunned when they get home, and for a minute Draco wonders if it was too much, if it wasn't his place, but then Harry tackles him into a hug that lasts until they make it to the bed.

Professor!Harry! Indian heritage trip! Ahh two beloved headcanons together, and the most thoughtful birthday gift. I love this idea anon 🥹

#so sweet my heart is bursting #Draco would totally do that #happy bday Harry 🎉🎉🎉

[spoonbf]

i love the idea of spider-man steve but can we talk abt spider-man eddie for a Moment☝️

like. Uncle wayne ??? Aunt may ????? hes poor, his parents are dead (probably) AND hes a creative little guy he could for Sure make a spidey suit And his own webs from scratch

#i had more thoughts on this but i forgot em #steve as harry osbourne do u see my vision #jk #but also srs #eddie munson #steve harrington #steddie #spider-man eddie #light of my life #DUSTIN AS HIS GUY IN THE CHAIR im going crazy #though #on the topic of spidey-steve #kas eddie would totally be green goblin 2.0 #been on my mind for a while #clearly #ive been informed that its osborn #not osbourne #my bad

[sussex-sweetheart]

Excuse me while I go burn my country to the ground...

#british royal family #brf #meghan markle #duchess of sussex #prince harry #duke of sussex #why would you say this? #even though i can totally imagine Charles doing this #seriously Australia get fucked

[lhrry]

x

#I don’t think they’re gearing up to end it rn #I know what they’re doing is purposeful like glaringly and ridiculously so because so many celebrities would shield their kids rather than #do this unprompted #and I think there’s a reason for this but I don’t think it’s ending now (although maybe they do want it to be as public as possible idk) #but I do think it’s possible louis is stunting so hard in exchange for artistic freedom and creative control and that album is probably #going to be queer as fuck #judging by some of the lyrics we are sure of and his resistance to ascribing meaning to them and the way he’s been talking about #the album being most him and even btm being seen by the label as potentially too alternative #I really hope he’s as happy and confident in the artistic aspect of his career and the album is what he wanted to do (and I really think it #is) and I really think that that’s where he’s going to be expressing himself most and I’m really so certain it’s going to scream queer #like even the btm cover green eye george michael reference is truly… something and the layers to btm and its meaning and the way he’s #talked about the song like #he saw how queer his audience is and he saw we understand the meanings of those songs and love them and he knows that we’re going to see #that in lt2 again and that we see him and I hope the album is everything he wished for #I think he’s paying a high price for it and it’s just not totally infeasible good think that if harry paid a high fucking price to be able #to do my policeman #louis is paying a high price to be able to have more artistic freedom #anyway some food for thought #I would LOVE for this to be explainable as an ending but eh not holding my breath

[phantomgrimalkin]

"Do you think we could track Pettigrew down and clear my name?"

"No," Remus replied gravely, "The author has less than zero interest writing that so it would have to be some half assed time skip and would disrupt the flow of the narrative."

"Well that seems like a bullshit reason, Moony."

#writing fanfic #Realized the characters realistically would be going after Peter but lord do i not want to write that at ALL #Not that I think what I'm doing is totally unrealistic #Just often when I realize the characters could change course I'll roll with it and this time it was just a hard 'fuuuuuck nooooo' #harry potter #wolfstar

[youremyonlyhope]

I can't believe we're at a point where every single character is having trouble in their love lives, except for Lady Denham who is the happiest we've ever seen her.

Honestly, good for her.

#sanditon #sanditon spoilers #Samuel and Lady Susan seem ok too but i'm not totally convinced they'll end up in a romance just yet. #but literally everyone else is just... upset about one thing or another. #i just rewatched season 1 over the last couple of days and i got reminded of why i hate edward so much #so hopping back in where he's seemingly turned a new leaf (but i still do not fully trust him) has been strange #i hope Augusta gets out of this unharmed but i'm not so sure from the promo for next episode. #and i went from not caring about Mr Starling's existence to now disliking him. #also poor Arthur but like. this would be good for Miss Lambe on paper. #ideal world would have her marry Harry and then she can pursue love with Otis and Harry can be with Arthur #and since Arthur and Georgiana are such good friends no one would really question it

[youasked]

Guys~~

Ea-Nasir as Sirius Black

So, hear me out

Do you remember that tumblr post about Ea-Nasir, the one who sold shitty copper around like 5000 years ago?

Well, so someone mentioned that like, someone must have had to be pretty fucking mad to write a complain on a clay, you know? And also that this fucking guy had all of this complains stored on his fucking house

Which is Hilarious, that right there, was a fucking joke

He was a motherfucking prankster with an hilarious sense of humour

And. . . It got me thinking

I am in the Harry Potter fandom, you see?

You know something very similar to this clay tablets, things that could only be wrote with a special anger quantity? HOWLERS. Just think about it.

At first i just thought he was a hilarious prankster but he didn't give me Fred and George vibes, they were far far far too flashy

But you know who he did vibe with? Who was just as dramatic as he was? Sirius Fucking Black

Because be realistic here, Sirius was always making his mother mad, he knew he did great if his mother sent him a howler about it. He would find it peak of comedy to store them, and then like show them as if he were seal collectionist

-This was because I sent home a toilet seat. This one was when we make everyone have green hair for a week-

And so on

But then,I remembered. Howlers explode.

And I was so sad, because he couldn't store them

But then, this hilarious image came to my mind of like, Sirius putting the howlers' ashes on glass jars. Labelling them, and storing them in a room like Ea-Nasir

And then I remembered this other post about someone who wanted to be cremated and the turn it's ashes into a gemstone, and then like

He would totally do that

He would one day hear he could do this and then, he and James would run to his jar store room, and he would totally gemstone the shit out of them

And then like, I don't know put then on a ring. And using it instead of the heir ring

And then he would flash it to Walburga and say something sick like

《The ashes of your resentment forged this gemstone in which the path of my life lays 》

Or some sick burn like that

Because

That gemstone is his life, every decision he took lays there, all he has done to make a path for himself to forge his life is in that gemstone.

And I just think that would be beautiful, hilarious.... but beautiful

And anyways thanks you for coming to my Ted Talk

#ea nasir #howlers #sirius black #james potter #harry potter #history #geology #gemstone #idk it just sounded right #i propose we fancast ea-nasir as sirius black #i want to forge a gemstone too #how many howlers do you think it took #the glass howler room #he would totally kiss that gem #where would he wear it #earring? necklace? ring? sword?