#how the fuck does the holonet even work. like how the fuck do you do a holocall from more than a planet away.

[other-peoples-coats]

look I know the chips are a retcon to make the tv shows etc more child friendly and also to get around the whole 'all these characters we hope you like (so we can sell merch)? guess what, they're secretly plotting to kill Our Heros :D!' thing, but on an in-universe level.

how the fuck do the chips work. what the fuck. I'm not even talking about how they make 3m+ people all suddenly mind controlled zombie murder-bots, I mean on a purely mechanically level, how the fuck do they work. what in the goddamn fuck kind of latency prevention do they have.

Skeevy sheevy calls Cody*, who is on the ass end of the fucking galaxy, and is like 'execute genocide.exe, toodles'. Cody then, presumably, somehow immediately transmits genocide.exe to every clone around him without saying shit - so the chips presumably have a short wave blutooth sort of ping capacity, all clones are wifi-enabled all the time - and then also presumably somehow transmits the genocide.exe order to like. the rest of his command? which is like half the GAR?? fast enough that it beats, presumably, jedi to jedi communication about 'what the fuck I'm getting murdered???', aka the whole wave of death in the force thing. Skeevilicious also (maybe?) calls other high level commanders - unclear if everyone gets the personal touch vis-à-vis names or if cody is just the Most Specialist Boy --fast enough to, again, beat the reply-all via the force that RE:Hey Rancid Vibes And Death Mostly Death. One has to assume the other commanders are also on the ass ends of the galaxy, but like, different ones, because of the whole galaxy spanning war thing.

Like the lag has to be approaching nothing. Instantaneous deployment across the entire fucking galaxy, or close enough to not really matter, plus some level of short wave chip-to-chip ping that requires no verbal component, given we see cody take the call from ol' mate skeev and then immediately successfully order the 212th to merk their general without a moment's hesitation from anyone.

what the fuck kind of magic ass tech runs the chips. forget the force, the real scifi magic is the communications capabilities in the GFFA.

*also side bar, moment of hilarity that the skeev-meister knows cody's name and uses it. Like lets be fucking real, our pal friendpatine does not think of the clones as people, but also, chances are that he's spent so fucking long pretending 'oh yes the clones need rights anakin soon as the war wraps up the terrible senate won't let them but not me I'm not like those other politicians' that it's just fucking habit at this point. Bro might not even fucking know cody's damn cc number to start with. which is actually funnier than it being habit to use his name - diversity win, the sith lord turning you into a zombie-muder machine to genocide a whole ass culture uses your chosen name, purely because he doesn't know how else to call you!

#gffa meta #order 66 #like. kind of. #coats chats #coats originals #anyway yes this is the sort of thing that keeps me up at night #logistics in the gffa have to be fucking insane. insane. #how the fuck does the holonet even work. like how the fuck do you do a holocall from more than a planet away. #it takes EIGHT FUCKING MINUTES for light from the SUN to REACH EARTH #EIGHT MINUTES. and that's in the same fucking solar system!!! #AT LIGHTSPEED. #every fucking holocall has to have a lag of like. #nine years. at least. #like ino it's the requirements of scifi ssshh but also EIGHT MINUTES AT LIGHTSPEED #how the fuuuuuuck does anyone have real time conversations via holonet.

[al-astakbar]

☆ The Gift -- Thrawn x reader ☆

> title ☆ The Gift ☆part 7/?

> summary ☆ As congratulations for his recent promotion to Grand Admiral, Emperor Palpatine gives Thrawn a gift -- a young woman who has been trained as a pleasure companion.

> pairing ☆  Thrawn x reader ☆ word count [2.2k] ☆ warnings for this part ☆ sex, mentions of bondage > series warnings ☆ dubious consent; sexual slavery; concubine/ sex slave AU; will add more warnings as more parts are posted

>series navigation ☆ part 1 ☆ part 2 ☆ part 3 ☆ part 4 ☆ part 5 ☆ part 6 ☆ part 7

> posted on ao3

author note!! To be very clear, in this story reader is a concubine against her will and is gifted to Thrawn, but there is at no point any noncon between Thrawn and reader. Reader is never noncon with anyone, either referenced or explicitly, and there is never any explicit noncon. However, this is a darker take on Thrawn and he doesn't really have many hangups about putting his gift to use...

When you get back to his quarters, he puts you over his desk and gives you a slow, thorough fucking. Compounded with how you had denied yourself the night before, he leaves you tender and aching with need. 

It need not be like this every time. 

He cleans you up again. Gentle attention that you think the schedule of a Grand Admiral should not have time for. He does it as intently as you’ve seen him do everything else, a lingering touch as he wipes his spend from your thighs. You can’t help a quiet moan nor the quiver that goes through you when he runs the cloth over your labia.

“Would you like to be alone?” His voice is low, soft, his expression knowing. 

Damn him, you almost--almost-- say yes. “No.”

**

For you, the rest of the day is quiet. You stay in the small sitting area, reading on the datapad, or else looking at the art or out the viewport at the blue stream of hyperspace.

If this is a template for how your days will be aboard the Chimaera, you suppose you will have to get used to monotony and loneliness. In the time Thrawn is at his desk, he hardly acknowledges you. After a lunch without conversation (he eats nothing), he goes into another room of the suite that is locked to you and does not come out for several hours.

By dinner you are restless, and almost glad for his company.

Two serving droids bring the meal and lay out two place settings at the small dining area next to the huge viewport in his main cabin. 

When the meal is cleared away, Thrawn’s plate again untouched, he tells you that you may spend the rest of the evening reading. That is better, you suppose, than what was permitted during your training in the cloister on Coruscant, where you couldn’t access the holonet. Still, you miss having embroidery to work on, and nameless, faceless friends to whisper to while doing chores.

Several times, you glance up from the datapad to find Thrawn looking at you appraisingly, as if trying to decide what to do with you. 

**

The rest of the trip to the Outer Rim passes in much the same way. You were expecting the passage of time in space to feel strange, after so long planet-side, but for the most part it doesn’t. The ship maintains its own day/night rhythm. The lights cycle on and off. The crew work in shifts, though there isn’t much to do yet, this early in a deployment. 

Thrawn wakes you at the same time every morning, you go to the bridge with him and observe silently from a corner. Ronan, to your frustration, continues to pretend like you don’t exist. 

You find little ways to annoy your new master: leaving your clothes all over the floor, blowing bubbles in your drinks, persistently asking him questions while he’s trying to work. More than once you push him too far and he strips you naked, ties you kneeling beside his desk. Sometimes a gag if he particularly wants quiet. Every time he does, you sit there fuming, petulant and humiliated, but you never fight him on it. Not really. You’d never admit it to him, or to anyone, but the restraint is almost calming.

Thoughts of your time on Coruscant linger in your mind most days, especially with little else to occupy you. The datapad, you’ve found after more searching and testing, has limited accesses, so you can’t get much new to read or watch. Thrawn’s art collection, while interesting at first, becomes familiar and mundane. By this point you think you could name each piece in order with your eyes closed. 

“I miss my friends,” you say aloud one evening. You don’t even really mean to say it to him, he’s just there, as always, reading quietly. 

He looks up. “Your friends on the city planet?”

You nod, suddenly a little shy. He actually sounds interested.

“The two who were with you at the ceremony did not seem friendly.” 

“Not the ones you saw. Mirri and Solis. They weren’t-- they weren’t nice. They were always there, they made sure we didn’t misbehave.”

Something flashes in Thrawn’s eyes-- perhaps he has something to say about the ineffectiveness of their methods when it comes to your own behavior. But instead he just asks more about what it was like, and you find no reason not to tell him. You were not supposed to use your own name, or anyone else’s. Your face was nearly always covered, so you had never really known what any of the others being trained looked like-- only brief glimpses. Shadowy impressions, a beautiful girl with light hair and eyes, a boy younger than you with curly brown hair and full lips, countless others.

None of you were supposed to acknowledge each other in any way that could remind you of your individuality, but you had still talked to them. Learned who they were by their voices and brief glimpses of exposed hands. You could tell a lot from that. From the skin tones and length and number of fingers. Not all were humans. You had seen other skin tones, like blue and green and yellow and orange, and some you could tell had to be Twi’leks from the way the hoods draped over their heads and lekku. Some wanted to be there, thought it would raise their social standing. Some were like you, unwilling and defiant. Some were broken, with no voice. 

They were all strangers, essentially. You had traded stories in hushed whispers, of others who had come before you, and their fates with cruel or kind masters. But most who left the cloister just disappeared. You would have no way of finding them again. 

“They were still my friends,” you add, a little defensive.

Until now, Thrawn has listened intently as you tell him all this, but offered no comment or reassurance. “I have no doubt,” he says softly.  

In his quarters, he fucks you efficiently and regularly, driving you closer to madness and relief every time. He knows what he is doing to you. He tells you he can feel how slick and tight you are, how good you feel, your lovely cunt takes my cock so well. He knows how his voice affects you, he feels you push your hips back to meet his when he murmurs obscene praise against your neck. He knows you still deny yourself pleasure, even as you moan his name and spread your legs to take him deeper.

At meals, you eat methodically while he watches you and eats nothing. Not even a sip of water, caf, nor the emerald wine served with supper, which is delicious. It makes you lightheaded, since you haven’t had alcohol since before arriving on Coruscant, over a year ago. The food is much richer than you’re used to as well. You mention both of these things to him one evening, instead of accusing him of being a creep for just sitting there staring at you. 

“It’s the standard meal served in the galley,” he explains. “Breakfast and lunch, too. Other than these accommodations and my pay, I claim few privileges. I eat the same as my crew does.”

You snort, taking a pointed sip of wine. Was that pronouncement supposed to win you over? “I’m sure the crew appreciates your humility and all the sacrifices you’ve made.”

“Perhaps.” 

“I’m willing to bet they don’t get a wine ration either.”

“They don’t,” he confirms. 

You have a moment to feel smug, having gotten him to admit some small hypocrisy. 

“You speak as if you’ve been in their position,” he says. “Have you served aboard a starship before? Prior military, perhaps? Or mercenary work.”

You freeze, glass halfway to your lips. For a moment, you consider denying it, but he misses nothing. Your reaction has already given it away. But if he guesses anything more specific-- it’s something you’d really rather not admit, especially to a Grand Admiral. “How’d you get that from wine rations and humility?” 

“You aren’t particularly… cordial… with officers. You know enough about ships to be impressed with the Chimaera-- on the approach the other day,” he specifies. 

“Anyone would be.”

“You have a sense of how ships function, how information flows among the crew-- “ he pauses with a slight frown. “My apologies. There is a word for it in my native tongue. I do not know its equivalent in Basic.”

“Gossip?” 

He shakes his head. “It is slang for the spread of rumors among the junior enlisted, as both an information network and a pastime.”

“How do you say it in your language?”

Thrawn hesitates. You think you might see some odd reluctance in his expression, but he masks it quickly, and answers. “Csarrob.” 

You try repeating it, but can’t quite form your lips and tongue to mimic the sounds. “The ships I was on called it the underground. Or the mafia, depending on what ship and what part of the galaxy.”

Thrawn goes quiet for a moment, the type of quiet you’ve come to recognize as the times he is thinking, and about to say something inconveniently perceptive. He sits back in his chair, one arm crossed over his chest, his other hand touching his chin. You’ve seen the same pose on the bridge-- with a dangerous edge to his usual even tone, he says one word that makes your heart drop. “Rebel.” 

There’s no way he could have known, nobody could have told him-- coming to the cloister, everyone’s identity was wiped clean. No one there had known, there were no records. You’d been given a new name, a new chain code. 

“You served on Rebel ships,” he presses.

You swallow a large gulp of wine and nod. 

His eyes seem to glow brighter. “And your position? Not very high, I would imagine, given that you’re here.”

Your mouth feels too dry. “Yeah, I was-- I was nothing, really. I was nobody. I served meals and mended uniforms. Fixed radios, cleaned blasters. Anything that needed to be done.” And though you’re loathe to admit it, your time so far with Thrawn has been luxurious compared to your short stint in the Rebellion. You had barely thought about it for so long, you’d almost forgotten. It had been buried, deep, and you’d never even thought to worry someone might find out.

“And you believed you needed to conceal this from me,” he says. “Explain your reasoning.”

“Other than…” you gesture at him. At his uniform. His rank. He gives you a level stare, as if to say ‘continue.’  “Fine. Well, I wasn’t trying to hide anything. It’s not a very exciting story. I was captured. Eventually sent through the ISB system. They interrogated me and then recommended me for the training.”

“So. You’ve been… domesticated.” He puts a sly twist on the word, suggestive in a way that makes arousal knife through you.

Your instinct is to glare at him, but you only manage to sound petulant. “Should I be kneeling at your feet during meals?”

“Perhaps. You might find that you enjoy it.”   

This sets your mind spinning, and it’s all you can think about the rest of the evening as you try to read on the datapad. He has unbalanced you so easily. The incisive deductions about your past -- ‘Rebel’ in his smooth, modulated voice replays in your mind over and over-- though he does not seem angry about it, or hateful, like you would expect of an Imperial. Only intrigued. 

As for the idea he’d put in your head… kneeling at his feet. During meals, or maybe while he’s working. He already makes you do it while restrained, but to settle there at his side by your own choice… Somehow the thought of it is calming, almost a fantasy. Sitting on the couch, you steal a glance at Thrawn, who is engrossed with something at his desk. You take a deep, slow breath. He might let you lean your head against his leg. Stroke your hair idly as he occasionally reads aloud from whatever he’s working on, his voice cool and soft. He seems to like your hair. He often touches it when he has you over his desk, brushing it off your face or combing his fingers through it as he fucks you and fills you over and over. 

Later, through the night and the following days and weeks, you try to keep yourself at a distance from him. It doesn’t really help. You find yourself unable to keep your eyes off him. Even in the privacy of your own thoughts, he holds this power over you.

You sit up attentively when you hear the hatch opening which signals his return. You listen when he speaks, though that isn’t often. He rarely chooses to share with you, and it only makes you more curious for information about him, his thoughts-- anything. In the meantime, you watch him, observing carefully, entranced by his quiet manner and his utter command over himself and his ship. 

Noticing that he was attractive before that was different, you rationalize. Anyone could see that. Just as anyone could pass a particularly attractive person on the street and notice them, but not spend the next month falling under their thrall. And each time you spread your legs for him, you tell yourself it’s because you agreed, because he convinced you that all the alternatives were worse. Not because you might, just a little, like his attention.

☆ link to part 8 ☆

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#thrawn #grand admiral thrawn #thrawn x reader #thrawn fic #star wars #thrawn x you #thrawn fanfiction #thrawn x y/n #thrawn fanfic

[thywildwind]

Hello, I would love to hear more about your AUs ❤️ Truthfully I'm in need of something soft or/and funny so if you wanted to tell us some stuff about your reverse AU, or the Forest Spirit one or more about coffeeshop AU I would be delighted to hear it ❤️

hello there! it’s very sweet of you, thank you <з

my reverse au is purely self-indulgent, because I wanted some soft and pining asexual idiots! there are works with demisexual Anakin I like, but I’ve never seen acespec Obi-Wan (which he is, according to canon, but... well. people are horny and we let them be), so it all started as a gentle mockery of suggestive impressions to lessen my insecurity about being asexual and to get a laugh out of it, and then the au transformed into ‘how much suggestive kneeling situations can I put smol Obi-Wan into before it starts getting awfully ridiculous?’

(the answer is... a lot. it is 5+1 au for a reason).

reverse au has a lot of soft touching and bickering! I’m aiming at soft-burn of sorts, where they are so smitten they don’t notice other’s romantic feelings & affection (isn’t it a given?); I can give you some headcanons I keep in mind while writing it:

Anakin does Obi-Wan’s plait after every shower and/or when Obi-Wan messes up his hair. Anakin likes plaiting Obi-Wan’s hair. he really does.

Anakin is an excellent cook and he likes it when Obi-Wan helps him (even if Obi-Wan can only make tea and eggs), but if Obi-Wan can’t or doesn’t want to help, Anakin insists he’s with him in the kitchen! and Obi-Wan likes to be in Anakin’s presence, because he is warm and loving. I like it when one’s significant one is there to entertain them or make it a livelier experience!

Anakin is ace and he is Very Oblivious to how his good looks affect people, but Obi-Wan is not, so he has unconsciously started on... territorial things. walking closer to Anakin, brushing his shoulders more times than strictly necessary, keeping training salle quite chilly, so Anakin wouldn’t take his tunics completely off.

Obi-Wan despises ships and maintenance, but Anakin adores it, so Obi-Wan keeps him company every time. it is both a pleasant and educational experience, because he spends time with his love of his life Master, and he learns some things mechanic, as well as fixing tricks, because Anakin likes to ramble about engines and spark plugs and pressure sensors out loud.

Anakin calls Obi-Wan either Padawan mine or by his name; I peg him as a person who’s very open with physical affection—neck touching, hair plaiting, palms caresses—but he might be somewhat reluctant to voice it. name-calling is intimate for him, he doesn’t want other people’s attention aimed at their pair just because Anakin calls Obi-Wan some lovely (in Obi-Wan’s very humble opinion) name, like stardust or my moon. I believe he won’t openly call Obi-Wan any sweetheart-dear-darling-angel names: he will use a foreign language. it’s silly and he knows it; damn, he calls Obi-Wan his love in Galactic Basic, but other names are too personal and sacred. if someone hears and knows its meaning—then, well, they must know better than bring it up. things said in foreign languages must be left in foreign languages, let the babes have some privacy((

Anakin is into gift-giving. that’s it. he gifts Obi-Wan plenty of things, and the Jedi may not have personal possessions, but what is a shimmersilk hair-tie? or a velvet strap for french-plaiting? or a hand-made holo night-light star systems projector (??the fuck do I call it, really?) for Obi-Wan to easily fall asleep, with twinkling stars and revolving planets?? it is??very cute??? and it has a sleep mode, so the projector turns off when it senses Obi-Wan is in deep sleep phase?? Anakin is Considerate.

Anakin thinks he is embarrassing for the starship models collection he keeps somewhere in his room, but Obi-Wan is the only one who saves credits to buy him those starship models. even if they are smuggled. sh-h.

they bond over space jellyfish documentaries from holonet sea & space research company, because Obi-Wan likes twinkling things, be it a hair-tie, a night-light or a living creature. Anakin finds it amusing and adorable, and they often go through their scheduled lightsabre maintenance with these documentaries in the background (Obi-Wan is very easy to distract with red-shining floating jelly, so Anakin finishes for them both and lets Obi-Wan get his jellyfish facts fill. and peaceful night in, of course).

oh, right. they like mouth kisses. gentle and unhurried, and they hold each other as precious creatures they are to one another. Anakin is (very obviously) into Obi-Wan’s hair, Obi-Wan is into Anakin’s everything, and they made it work, make it work and are and will make it work.

that’s it, I believe. I can go on for hours, and I would like to get into another aus sometime later! hope this gives you some comfort, lovely.

thank you for visiting my soft ace!obikin TEDtalk, it was very nice getting to know them with you.

#obikin #obi-wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #reverse master & padawan au #oh! i remembered i have a soft fix-it with alive shmi #that one has more concepts than actions & plot #but i’ve been very much in love with it since i’ve seen aotc and wanted to save shmi for anakin #i JUST remembered my post-war 5 times they crashed their ship just to have romantic dinner and 1 time they didn’t have to sacrifice it au!! #it is the silliest thing i came up with after cottagecore witch!anakin & retired jedi!obi-wan au #(whispers) 2023. sir. i beg you to let me write & finish & post at least two obikin fics this year! please!

[phoenixyfriend]

"Hey Aayla? They gave me a kid and I don't know what to do."

This one contains contributions by @atagotiak, @dracothulhu, and @gelpenss.

Do you think Anakin ever panicked about how to raise a child, and then at one point went "oh god, I don't know anything about teenage girls" because he interacts with maybe two women in his life and one of them is his wife, who is very human and knows nothing about Togruta adolescence and how puberty is going to display

And he just calls up Aayla like "Hey so I know that you're an example of a female padawan that had a male master of an unrelated species, do... do you known where I'm supposed to get information? On how to handle a teenage girl? I don't know anything about Togruta puberty and I don't know if I'm supposed to just look it up on the holonet or grab a pamphlet from medical or just find an older female Togruta in the order. Nobody told me what the Jedi protocol for this is and I didn't have any time to prepare before they just gave me a fourteen-year-old. Help?"

This would be so much easier if they weren’t in the middle of an interstellar war. Many things would be, but also this specifically.

Call up your old babysitter and ask her for advice, she's basically a cousin, right?

Anakin just having a breakdown bc he doesn’t know if Togruta get periods and he doesn’t know how to ask, or who to ask.

"Anakin, who taught you about this stuff?"

"Aayla, I grew up on Tatooine and thought the explosive in my arm was something to make jokes about, I don't know what's child appropriate!"

"Half the female togruta and twi'leks I knew growing up were implanted with hormone manipulators for... you know why, you can guess, it was fucking Tatooine, anyway my point is that I don't. I don't know things? I don't know things. Aayla help."

(Aayla, notably not a togruta, maybe advises him to call Shaak Ti? But I feel like Anakin might find her intimidating. Anakin only knows one adult female Togruta, and it's Master Ti, who's very nice but also on the Council, and currently on Kamino, and he feels like there's probably steps he can take before bothering her.)

Aayla finds out about Anakin's marriage but mostly because he's having a meltdown about taking care of a teenager, while he himself is barely more than a teenager.

"Are you just calling me because I'm the only girl you know?"

"The only other girl I know is Senator Amidala, and she knows even less about the Order's padawan-rearing resources than I do!"

It's likely that Jedi kids get standardized sex ed classes (maybe with more focus on your own species just for practicality and all that, there are many many species). It’d be the sensible thing to do. As a result, I'm imagining that Ahsoka is entirely unaware of Anakin's meltdown. Also, even if he took them, he probably didn’t pay attention to the Togruta part. So things like “do togruta get periods? Do I need to order supplies????” and other things like that are still relevant.

And/or is so overwhelmed with New Parent Panic that he forgot they all got those lessons, and Ahsoka probably already knows what's up.

(TBH, how many human parents do you know that worry similarly. Most people go through sex ed classes in middle/high school, but we all generally worry about what behavior to expect out of teenage siblings/children.)

And he doesn't know if there's other stuff to expect that has nothing to do with sex ed! He doesn't know how often Togruta need to brush their teeth! What if she needs to eat sand to digest things! Does she need specialty lotion for work on sunny planets? HE DOESN'T KNOW AND HE DOESN'T TRUST A TEENAGER TO TAKE CARE OF THEMSELF BECAUSE HE SURE DIDN'T AT THAT AGE

Like, Anakin knew speeder racing was illegal and still did it. He's absolutely worried about Ahsoka doing some similar "Well, yeah, it's smart, but I don't feel like it" thing. Maybe she does need vitamins and he just doesn't know it, and she's lying because she thinks they taste gross but she needs them and he doesn't know!!! Teenagers do that!

(Anakin often forgets that not everyone is the same kind of disaster as he is.)

(Not that Ahsoka isn't her own kind of disaster.)

Aayla does kind of feel for him because most Masters have more warning about when they'll be taking on a padawan. They have time to research before the kid moves in. Anakin was handed a teenager in the middle of a battle and told to get to it.

The Order has been dealing with a very high rate of cross-species adoptions for a very very long time. Maybe they’ve got pamphlets.

It's part of why he went to Aayla: she's been the cross-species padawan. She probably knows who Quinlan talked to!

You know who’d probably be the best person to go to? Jocasta Nu. Just bc she’d know where to find the reference material and as great as a same-species mentor for advice is they might miss some things bc they’re so routine.

"Do you want to deal with Master Nu being judgy at you for wanting information (remembering that providing information is literally what she’s there for) or Master Che being judgy at you for neglecting your padawan’s health?"

Aayla probably suggests that and Anakin's panic spirals into "but she's scary" and "she'll judge me for not being prepared!"

"You literally had negative notice for acquiring a child and you're twenty, you had ample reason to not be prepared."

Honestly she’s probably extremely used to knights coming in all panicked and lost like a week after getting a kid of another species. It seems like a scenario that would come up a lot. She probably remembers Obi-Wan panicking and trying to slap together a crash course in Foundational Jedi-ing for Anakin, and at least they were the same species. She probably wouldn't judge in the slightest, she's seen it all before... not that Anakin would realize that. He's too busy freaking out.

I wouldn’t judge someone who intentionally adopted a kid panicking a bit later and grabbing extra reference material. You can’t be prepared for everything y’know? At least they’re trying.

Honestly Anakin being worried would be something that like... they’d negative-judge him for. Anyone who doesn’t know about Yoda meddling would be judging him and if they find out he’s

A. taking it seriously

and

B. not WILLFULLY unprepared

there’s a high chance they’d be super sympathetic.

Unfortunately, Anakin thinks EVERYONE judges him for EVERYTHING.

#Anakin Skywalker #Aayla Secura #Ahsoka Tano #Jocasta Nu #Snips and Skyguy #obi wan kenobi #star wars #Phoenix Posts

[obiwanobi]

listen to this AU: obi-wan sleeps with a random guy in the outer rim, realises the day after that he lacked a force signature (aka he hid it), gets suspicious but doesn't meet the guy until like three years later. they sleep with each othr again, they get the other's name (surprise it's anakin), obi-wan thinks he's a pilot, anakin just thinks obi-wan is a regular jedi, not the famous one from the holonet BECAUSE HE'S THAT STUPID. fast forward, they've met several times, slept with eachother 1/2

BUT also bonded, they kinda like each other now, obi.wan looks forward to meeting the handsome arrogant pilot with suspicious jobs, anakin likes the handsome jedi even though he knows he probably shouldn't BECASUE HE HAS A SECRET, also they've avoided the whole force signature thing. one day they meet again. on dooku's ship. anakin has a lightsaber A RED ONE, and obi-wan's like YOU'RE A SITH?? and anakin is like YOU'RE THAT OBI-WAN KENOBI? 2/?

so it turns out, anakin is a sith apprentice because he and dooku/palpatine made a deal, his apprenticeship for his mother's freedom, so he's been secretly training under dooku but never really fought in the war, only doing weird solo missions so obi-wan has never heard of him but without slept and maybeee just fallen in love with a SITH and anakin is super scared of dooku/palpatine, so he's torn between trying to kill obi and getting punished harshly if he doesn't ?/?

but yeah there's this big drama about palpatine being a sith lord, obi-wan being in love with anakin, anakin wanting to help his unofficial boyfriend but also scred of what his master will do to him or his mother, and hopefully this AU has a happy ending with palpatine dying and shmi surviving but i'm not sure. and yeah i was supposed to be anonymous when writing this but forgot so now you know my guilty pleasure aka obikin and star wars

(it’s alright, I don’t have to post your username if you don’t want other people to know 😘) 

my god, this is SO GOOD. I adore the idea of them casually having sex before catching feelings and realising who they are, what a perfect trope.

The post was getting a bit long, so have some more ideas under the cut! 

In an always-a-sith!Anakin AU, I like to think that Obi-Wan doesn’t get a padawan for a while (and probably think that because he barely made it as a padawan himself, he’s not the right person to teach future Jedi,) so it gives him plenty of time to take missions that let him gallivant around the galaxy and be his flirting and daring self without restriction for ten glorious years. So a one night stand with the gorgeous pilot (probably a spice runner, but hey, Obi-Wan isn’t here to judge,) with the arrogance of someone who’s never been praised and loved enough in his life? It’s precisely what Obi-Wan does best. 

At first, Anakin probably thought that it would be fun to sleep with a Jedi, you know, for the irony, but Obi-Wan is strangely pleasant, charming and witty. Not at all cold, moralistic and straight-laced, like other darksiders described the Jedi Order, and he hides behind his charming demeanours and smooth voice a surprisingly daredevil side, which is... very hot, if you ask Anakin.

And the sex is great, so when they meet once again a few months later, it becomes an unspoken agreement that if they’re on the same planet/close to each other, they could... catch up more regularly. It works well, so well that when Anakin sends him a message to tell him that yes, he’s on Coruscant for one rotation, but don’t expect anything from me Obi-Wan, I’m sick, cold, feverish, miserable and absolutely not in the mood, Obi-Wan shows up with medicine and his favourite pastries, before spending the night checking his temperature and fussing over his eating habits. No one has ever taken care of him like that since his mom.

The same night, the news report another great victory for the Republic thanks to the famous Negotiator, and Anakin snorts, says that it’s a very dumb nickname, and what’s his name again? Ben or something? but each time the reporter says his full name Anakin sneezes and each time there is footage of Obi-Wan on screen Anakin goes to the fresher, and Obi-Wan probably thinks he’s the stupidest person in the galaxy and he loves him so much.

Obi-Wan knows he should question Anakin about why he’s always showing up not too far from shady businesses and galaxy-wide conflicts, but Anakin can be very distracting, and his job is not something Obi-Wan wants to know too much about. After all, not talking about the contraband and the flagrant illegality of it all makes it easier to turn a blind eye to it. 

And as you say, the day comes when they finally meet as Jedi and Sith in a real battle, and after a few minutes of “you’re a Sith?” “You’re the famous Jedi who leads half of the Republic’s fleet and you never told me?? I thought you were spending more time teaching at the Temple or gathering old and boring archive files!” “Excuse me, YOU’RE A SITH.” I like to imagine a long fight scene à la Mr and Mrs Smith, with a lot of dirty moves and a lot of “so that time you said you couldn’t see me because you were busy with a large delivery on a sector suspiciously close to Separatist space...?” “yeah, I was picking up one of Grievous’ platoon.” “...I can’t believe I introduced you to my padawan!”

They’re both angry and betrayed, and it ends up with both of them tired, panting, sabers right next to each other’s neck, waiting. After a few seconds, Obi-Wan shakes his head, lowers his blade and says that he won’t do it. He can’t. It pisses Anakin off, but nothing he says (yells furiously at him) can wipe out his sad smile and the tenderness in his eyes, and Anakin breaks.  

They end up fucking again. There are... way too many feelings involved here to be as casual as they pretended until now. “We shouldn’t,” Anakin says quietly, after, both of them still entangled in each other, unwilling to let go.“You shouldn’t. I’m a Sith.” “Now you tell me.” It makes him laugh for a second. 

Now, what’s the ending of this story? Does Anakin tell Obi-Wan that this is just this one time, and next time he will definitely kill him, whatever happens? Does Obi-Wan sees right through him and knows that he’s on the edge of a breakdown, that there must be a reason for Anakin to do all of this, pleading for him to “talk to me, dearest, why won’t you talk to me? Why won’t you let me help, Anakin?” even when they’re both in the middle of a battle, and it justs breaks Anakin a bit more each time?

Or does Anakin explain everything to him right away, and Obi-Wan convinces him that they will find a solution, they will save his mother and stop Sidious, but for now, he has to pretend to remain a loyal Sith? To play it safe, give them time to figure out how to rescue Shmi and stop Sidious? 

 I’m 100% invested now, you should definitely consider writing this fic because it’s an amazing AU! (with or without the ideas I threw here, I was just really into it) 

#without anakin as his padawan obi-wan would have spent 10 slutty years as a dashing knight travelling the galaxy and you can't change my min #obikin #asks #clem's aus #(not mine but it's for the bl) #anon

[iknowwhattosaynow]

Writing asks! 7, 20 & 26 (for Kanan and Hera)

7. My favorite tag: WHY is Kanan alive? BECAUSE SHUT UP, that's why. 20. Generally, I only work on one at a time...which turns into ridiculously long fics. I take breaks on occasion to write filthy smutty one shots while I'm doing it though. How it works? FUCK if I know. 26. I think what I consider OOC when it comes to Kanan & Hera is anything just gratuitously and nauseatingly fluffy. Like, you can have some fluff, but here's my take on why flower shops and shit just doesn't work with them: Hera has never known anything but war and she is single-mindedly obsessed with destroying an entire Galactic Empire. Homegirl was flying relief missions at 14 years old, spying on Imperial refineries at age 10 and trying to convince her father that she could fight, and sometime before age 10, she'd lost a brother. She ditched her absent father and her homeworld at 18 to go sniffing out the Empire's shit from talking to people on the holonet. She had zero childhood and she put every piece of what she was into becoming a pilot and fighting the Empire. To me, Hera is more of a 'I don't need to be cuddled but if you need to be cuddled, I'll cuddle you' kind of girl. She doesn't say things that are sweet and fluffy all the time because she's seen what happens to a man when he loses the woman he loves so I think to a degree she even fears being in love, even if she can't deny being in love with Kanan*. *That being said, I never think she actually withheld saying the words to him until the minute before he died. That's bullshit and I have like at least one solid way to prove that she said it to him before he died. Kanan? Dude was pulled away from his family probably at six months old, doesn't even know what planet he is from or who is parents are and he'll never get that opportunity because there's no Jedi archives he can access for that. He went from dreaming of being a Jedi and raised with always having enough food and structure and all the good Jedi academy stuff to his Master D Y I N G so he could live. At the age of 14, he was a war veteran that he had to change everything about what he was and forget about what he'd dreamt of being; of the thing he'd been training for almost his entire life. He spent months being miserable and hyper-focused on how of the Jedi Masters died. When that didn't work for him (along with things like eating out of dumpsters), he became a womanizing, carousing, bar fighting, Force denying, drunk. Then he got all drunk on Hera™ and got in one good fight with the Empire and even though he was still reluctant to get involved with all of that he was still like "I pick this one. Forever.*" Literally, somehow the man got all strung out on the Tw'ussy and decided that being a Jedi maybe wasn't that bad of an idea. *See: A New Dawn, where he decides like three times in the book that he, the guy who avoids long term relationships or friendships, will follow her anywhere forever. Out of the pair, he's definitely the more cuddly one - he didn't have parents, he had the order. He hasn't seen the consequences of a man losing his wife. He was raised to be fearless and I think that fearlessness manifests in how unconditionally he loves Hera and he's perfectly fine saying it aloud like it's no big deal. Also, he's fine if Hera doesn't like cuddling but he likes to be cuddled so she'll have to cuddle him. THAT BEING SAID: Some of the like super fluffy stuff for them just makes me cringe. They just don't live in a time where they can be super fluffy. Do they make googly eyes at each other when nobody is looking? Absolutely. Do they hold hands in the cockpit while the kids are in bed? Yup. Does he smack her on the ass when he passes her in the corridor when they're going in opposite directions? OF COURSE he does. Does she love to play with his hair while they're lying in bed or when he's in a mood? Listen, if Hera Syndulla had her own hair to play with, the Empire would have won. Are they space married? Fuck yeah. Do they have glorious sex? ALL. THE. TIME. Do they love each other like crazy? DUH. Do

they do cutesy things like buy each other presents and go on a date just to go on a date (they literally schedule sex time in my head...that's their closest thing to a date) or have an actual wedding when they get married? Fuck no. Like, would a marriage proposal be Kanan being on one knee with a ring and all of that gross gooey conventional shit? That should be a trigger warning on a fic to me. Even if you put them in an AU where their lives never sucked, then they just turn into a random Twi'lek named Hera and a hot human named Kanan - because their experiences make them who they are and form their personalities. They're just not gratuitously fluffy people to me. ;TLDR My answer to 26 is Fluffy.

#that was an accidental essay #hera syndulla #kanan x hera #kanera #kanan jarrus #ask me #ask game #ask me fic stuff #oops #also fluff is not the same as intimacy - they totally hold hands and are sweet to each other #kanan just doesn't do shit like bring her flowers and buy her presents #his tongue is gift enough #headcanon: kanan absolutely loves to smack hera's ass when she walks by in the corridor #also headcanon: hera loves kanan's ass

[loth-wolffe]

About that Fox post: i absolutely love you for writing it, thank you for that

Also, for your consideration:

- Where were you during the zillo beast attack?

- throwing a surprise birthday party for him?

- going shopping together

- I have a scenario that him dating an investigative journalist would be very chaotic, any thoughts?

- what's the friendship with his brothers like?

- why do i fell he would be good with kids? Like your nephew or something

- on that note, does he get the dad genes from Jango?

- post-war AU? in the timeline where Palpatine chokes and dies like he's supposed to

- Getting!! Married!! (eventualy)

many Fox thoughts today, many thoughts

sorry this is so long, I have little self control and a lots of love for fox. i love u so much for asking this and letting me explore what a life with fox would be like.

also I apologize for being a h*rny bitch and not controling myself, so nsfw thots are marked like this so if u wanna skip that's fine.

and uh, first I'm gonna answer the investigative journalist hc and base everything about this in that solely thought because that's a galaxy brain thing to say.

I have a scenario that him dating an investigative journalist would be very chaotic, any thoughts?

AHDJSJ I LOVE THIS. okay okay but I feel like because of this job this is exactly why you guys met, like you needed some info and you asked some shiny but he didn't know a thing and you were like "is there someone I can talk with about this?" and when he's about to reply, Fox enters in action and he's like "need anything?" but sO COCKY.

he hates journalists mostly because some of them treat the clones very badly and never talk about the casualties or that kind of stuff about war, right.

like, it would turn into this-- banter filled with sexual tension that would've ended up in a make out session if 1. fox didn't have that much of self control and two if he weren't wearing his bucket.

it'd be like

"listen man-"

"it's commander for you." a pause, "or sir."

or like

"i need to do other things if you don't mind."

"i can think of a few you could be doing right now." and the way your eyes run through his entire body, even if he's all covered in plastoid but damn you if he isn't the hottest man walking, and he actually shivers, and gulps, because it's not like he wasn't thinking about that either, pushing down your pants and railing you right then and there in that fucking filthy alley. he is well aware how his suddenly codpiece feels too tight, but you only smirk and go, "you know, like giving me the information I need?"

KDJSJ IMAGINE THE POWER. THE POSSIBILITIES.

it'd be so ridiculous, but you also caused this impression on him that when you turned away to go on your business he was dEVASTED, but he didn't want to let u know he actually liked you. He's stubborn, that man.

So by some miracle when you're investigating something, you guys run into each other bc he's on patrol or something and he's GIDDY. but also frozen in place bc he didn't think he would ever see you again, mostly because Coruscant is big and has too many people in it. and you're like

"ah, commander fox, isn't it?" and he quickly resumes to say something that shows how aNNOYED he pretends to be, but he ends up tagging alone because "these parts are not safe"

"oh?"

"you'd need protection."

and the smirk you have is sO ARROGANT because it's not your first rodeo.

"you wouldn't want to have a civvie getting killed or something on your watch now, would you?" and he clears his throat and nods sharply. and you give him this innocent eyes and bat your lashes, "my hero."

and if you think those words didn't do aNYTHING to him, you're mistaken u hear me, he's instantly hARD.

so anyways after that YOU ask him out, and he's like, stuttering and saying yes and all.

now some random thoughts on this magnificent hc.

• if it can't be himself, he would always have the men he trusts the most going on patrols around the zone you're around in case something happens.

• he lOVES when you rant about something new you discovered, and when he asks for mOre info bc he's a, how do you say chismoso?, he loves gossip??? anyways and you're like "nu huh, you gotta wait till tomorrow, foxie"

• he aLWAYS makes sure to read/see your job, either if you work for some newspaper, magazine, etc or if you're on the TV he nEVER misses it.

• if you work for the TV, his brothers are always like "fOX YOUR GIRL IS ON THE HOLONET LIKE RN!!!" and he gives them this bitch face because he kNOWS THANK YOU.

• alright but imagine going on dates with him and being like "did you know there was an investigation last year around this part that–?" ROMANCE AT ITS PEAK.

• if his shift ends before you even think of going home, he definitely joins you on your investigations.

Where were you during the zillo beast attack?

uhh, I think you'd be home, like maybe you turned in early and fox maybe didn't know, so he was almost in tears when he called you after the whole thing happened because he was so worried.

of course, during the attack, he tried to push the thought aside, bc I think all clones have this, uh, switch, that makes them not worry during missions that much? just like, have this thought here and there but nothing serious that would make them paralyzed and have a panic attack right there. but every second he thought of you and hoped you were alright.

unlike you, that were worried sick because you saw the chaos unfold, the troopers arriving in shuttles and the jedi doing whatever they were doing and you just heard destruction. you DID cried a bit and when fox called you, you cried even harder. and he was like "it's alright, I'm alright baby."

that night he hold you SO tight, whispering sweet nothings on your ear and never stopped kissing you once. you barely got any sleep because you were so afraid of waking up only to find out the other died on the attack and it was all a dream.

throwing a surprise birthday party for him?

AAAAAH THIS IS SO CUTE.

now, clones don't exactly have a birthday???? but he did all these nice things for your birthday (he and the boys baked you a cake that was sO UGLY and tasted a bit weird) so you thought you could surprise him too.

it's most likely he gives you the date when he graduated from Kamino or something and for all the years you're with him, you never miss his "birthday" at first you did something quiet, like a dinner at your place, bought him something nice, gave him a bath or something and spoiled the shit out of him.

so for the second year, you threw him a party in his office, made him this cake or whatever and decorated with red and white balloons and invited a few troopers that wanted to help you and he was stoic for a moment, but then you were like "hAPPY BIRTHDAY!" and hugged him so tight and he relaxed under your touch and whispered this small "thank you baby"

everyone congratulated him and he was a bit awkward but when they start telling all these stories of them and fox on the job, he starts to loosen up a bit, so while everyone is eating cake he hugs you from behind and chuckling lowly in your ear as he listens to his brothers.

he dOESNT like pda like I said but he forgets for a moment because he just loves you sO SO SO SO MUCH. it's also easier for him to whisper filthy things into your ear and mumble how good you are for him, that he doesn't deserve you, that he can't wait for everyone to leave cause he wants to have his present (you) nipping your earlobe and making u all hot and bothered and would def fuck you nice and hard on his desk. yup

going shopping together

imagine, jUST IMAGINE, he'd look like your personal bodyguard 😭😭 like, he'd be behind you carrying most of your bags and people would look at you wondering who are you, why are you sO important to have the commander of the Coruscant guard with you???

but like, you don't care and fox doesn't even notice, and he'd be so attentive, faking to be both annoyed and uninterested but he'd see this nice shirt or dress or whatever and grumble something like "you'd look good on this" i just-

and like when you pass by the lingerie store, dUDE, he'd make you model for him, him sitting like he fucking owns the place, getting harder and harder every time he sees you in a new pair of underwear and when you show off this cute little red set. damn.

if you go to the market or something, he'd always love to show you these things like "look at that" or just pull you towards this stall and you'd adORE to show him stuff like, "ohh, fox here try this" or "what you think about this?" and stuff like that.

what's the friendship with his brothers like?

i think it'd be very easy-going and light, they would tease you sometimes, but they really like you, mostly because they see fox isn't as stressed as before and they see how happy he is when around you.

they think he deserve it, to have somewhere where he's free and loved, so yeah.

they sometimes ask him about you and never miss a chance to say hi when you stop by the office.

the boys absolutely ADORE you.

why do i fell he would be good with kids? Like your nephew or something. does he get the dad genes from Jango?

HE WOULD AND HE DOES.

like, I think at first he'd be very hesitant when it comes to children, like he'd be nervous when you introduce him to your niece and when you ask him if he wants to hold her, he says a quick no and just prefers to watch you, heart feeling funny when you make faces at the little baby in your arms.

at some point he dOES hold her, with such care and a gentleness that makes your heart flutter, and he coos softly as she sleeps soundly in his arms, rocking her with a delicacy you thought impossible from such hard man, and when he looks at you his eyes shine with this flash of something you can quite place but makes your heart skip a beat and think of how much you'd love to have this, with him, a little family, a baby that has his curls and maybe your eyes, a mix of your skin color with his and maybe his stubbornness completed by your charisma. a perfect little thing for you two to hold and care and love.

he'd be such a good dad, but then again every clone would be the most fantastic dad bc it's literally in their genes.

if you have a nephew that is, u know, older but still a kiddie, like 5 or 6, the lil boy would be aMAZED by fox, he'd love him so much, like imagine, always asking for the commander, wanting to play with him, asking fox to carry him eVERYWHERE, and at first fox would be like, shy and uncertain and he wouldn't know how to act until he accepts the fact that this little boy really likes him and looks up to him and fox becomes The Cool Uncle™

post-war AU? in the timeline where Palpatine chokes and dies like he's supposed to and Getting!! Married!! (eventualy)

well, in my post-war AU, clones get Rights™ and get paid and have vacations and stuff, sO, maybe you get to have Fox for a little more time and his schedule isn't as bad as it was during the war, so maybe after the war you get home to a nice dinner and fox using this silly apron and sometimes you come home early just so you can cook with him.

maybe you go on holidays to these nice places, going to the beach or the woods and finally settling somewhere quiet, start a family in this nice house or if you don't want kids then it's just the two of you and maybe a few pets.

i think the wedding would be officiated in Coruscant, of course, so his brothers and your fam can go, he'd definitely cry when he see you walking down the isle or when you put the ring on his finger and he'd be so so so happy, dancing with you all night, being so clingy because he's just Over the moon, y'know, kissing your cheeks and neck, whispering how lucky he is and how much he loves you, and how good you look, never leaving your side and always leaning over with pouty lips for you to kiss him.

when he proposed it was during one of your sweet, soft times with him, maybe in the aftertaste of your sexy times, as he holds you close to his chest, fingers running up and down your skin, as he stares at the ceiling and the question comes out as if he were talking about the weather, his heartbeat is slow and steady and it's one of those times he feels confident and sure.

you have talked about a future together, so he knows you'd say yes.

it's more a statement than a question, really.

"marry me." he would say, so quietly, almost a whisper. and when you look up you only find this beautiful emotion filling his eyes.

"what?" you just want to make sure you heard right, he'd smile softly, cup your cheek and as his thumb caresses your skin he'd whisper.

"will you marry me?"

you oBVIOUSLY say yes while ugly sobbing.

#ANYWAYS #i love fox #i love him your honor #I LOVE HIM #commander fox x reader #commander fox #headcanons #ted talks with ari

[ooops-i-arted]

(No spoilers here since I'm sure you haven't watched Ch14 att of this ask) But what did you think of S2E6 from a child development/Din's Dad skill's perspective?

One of the most interesting things to me is that we’re starting to get hints that Grogu is more developed than previously indicated, possibly more like a preschooler than a toddler.  It’s been mentioned that he’s been “trained” (although we don’t know what that entails yet*) and Gideon, interestingly, talks directly to Grogu like a person who is capable of understanding him.  The only other people who have really done this are Din (his caretaker) and Ahsoka (who is able to communicate with him via the Force).  Does Gideon know something we don’t about Grogu/his species/his development?  Or was he just desperate to monologue at someone and Grogu was his only available victim?

*Very curious what this “training” consists of.  It’s honestly borderline age-inappropriate to have formal lessons like you usually think of having at school at such a young age; children learn through play.  Meditation I can see, especially as a self-soothing or calm down tool that would be vital for children that can potentially kill you with their mind, but I wonder what else Grogu was taught at the Temple.  Maybe we’ll get more clarification when we find out exactly what he was trying to do at the seeing stone.

Anyway wasn’t that opening cockpit scene the cutest???  What a far cry from their first few scenes, where Din wouldn’t let the baby play with the orb or the buttons.  They’ve really gotten so close and comfortable with each other; no wonder Grogu doesn’t want to leave his daddy!  (Also Din has leveled up that Dad Voice; contrast “give me the ball” with “you stay right here, you stay, don’t move.”)  Also I loved Din narrating everything he was doing and thinking.  I model for my students like this all the time.  Din seems to have realized the importance of explaining things to the kid and even craves the connection and communication.  I really felt like while Din doesn’t want to give Grogu up at all, he would rather do what he believes is best for his child, rather than selfishly keep him, but he doesn’t want Grogu to feel abandoned or that Din doesn’t care about him.  So even though he’s not good at explaining that, he tries.  And Grogu in turn seems reluctant to do Jedi Stuff, knowing it will lead to Leaving Dad, but still does it anyway because Din wants him to, and kids want to please adults they care about.  Anything for that sweet, sweet positive reinforcement and praise (which Din gives).

Also maybe it’s just me, but something about the way Din said “I can’t train you” just gave me the vibe that maybe he’d thought about it?  Desperately Space Googled anything on the Holonet about How To Train Your Weird Green Magic Kid to see if maybe he could do it and find a way to keep him AND give Grogu the best education possible?  But ended up still resolving that he was gonna do what was truly best for the kid, even if it wasn’t what Din wanted for himself.  Cuz HE LOVES HIS SON SO MUCH.  Many Dad Points gained.

I also loved that Din does not know a single gotdamned thing about the Jedi, but STILL tries to help his son be The Best Jedi Ever by attempting to find a switch or something to help him do Whatever Jedi Stuff He Is Supposed To Be Doing, continuing his trend of being a proud coach from the sidelines for his boy.

Also this is 100% true to life, my students can confirm, one of them does this CONSTANTLY: Din:  okay I need you to do the thing Grogu: *does not do the thing, delays as long as possible* Din:  okay nevermind don’t do the thing it’s time to go on to the next thing Grogu: *immediately does what he was asked*

Which again is “defiance to regain control of the situation” behavior.  I mentioned that last time and I think it’s the same deal - Grogu feels out of control of what’s going on in his life, but it’s safe to act out with Din because he knows Din will not harm him.  So he does as opposed to shutting down.

But of course then he gets kidnapped, which has to be completely and utterly terrifying.  He’s been safe for a while now, with a caretaker who looks after him and makes all the bad and scary things go away.  The last thing he saw, he was safe with Dad.  But then he opens his eyes and there are bad scary droids all around who snatch him up and take him away from Dad!  Of course he is absolutely terrified!

We don’t see what happens between that and him in the cell.  But I’m guessing nothing good.  He’s back with things he associates with fear, violence, and death - stormtroopers and cold Imperial equipment - and he’s all alone.  Even if all that happens is getting dragged to his cell, that has to be overwhelmingly scary even for an adult, let alone a little one who isn’t emotionally mature enough to handle all that fear.

We also don’t know what started the violence we see at the end.  Grogu has not initiated violence onscreen so far; although it’s up to interpretation, even choking Cara was reactive imo (we see him looking scared before he does it, so I’ve always seen that scene as him misunderstanding and thinking Din was in danger).  Personally I’m inclined to think Gideon ordered the troopers to antagonize Grogu to see what he was capable of and to tire him out, but that’s pure speculation at this point.

Either way, this is the most violent we have seen Grogu so far.  Every other instance of Force use is purely practical, aimed to solve the problem at hand.  Mudhorn? Stop it from beating Dad.  Fireball? Push it away from my friends.  Greef’s injured?  Fix it up.  Even choking Cara is arguably just done to stop the “fight” Grogu perceives happening rather than make her suffer.  But these stormtroopers are being thrown, choked, tormented.  It’s not about keeping them away from him or protecting himself, it’s about hurting them.  So to slide over into Force commentary, imo that’s his first potential Dark Side slippage.  Because he’s acting out of fear and anger, not a desire to protect or solve a problem.

And as a general rule, kids don’t go instinctively for true violence.  They may hit and bite and stuff, but it’s a reactive thing to stop something they don’t like rather than truly wanting to hurt the other person.  So Grogu being that intentionally violent?  That’s bad, and not just from a Jedi perspective.  I worked with a very violent student a few years ago and that particular case was because of trauma/abuse in their past.  In Grogu’s case that’s possible, but I also think that for a long time he’s been normalizing violence.  I’m guessing he saw plenty even before Din got him, if he’s a Temple refugee (and has presumably received training about connecting to other Jedi) he possibly felt the death of thousands of other Jedi deeply through the Force, and ever since we’ve known him he has been exposed to LOTS of violence.  Even if Grogu is in his own mind/started out only trying to defend himself, he knows “the person I admire most in the entire galaxy would kill the fuck out of these guys, and then I would be safe, so maybe I should try that too.”  So not very good for Grogu’s psyche at all.  (Oh and on top of all of that, he presumably saw Gideon before, knows this man almost killed his daddy, and is now threatening him.  So a Scary Cherry on the Sundae of Fear.)

There’s a lot to chew on here and we’ll have to see where it goes - personally I hope Grogu can keep himself on the Light Side but I suspect he’s in grave danger right now, not just physically but emotionally and mentally as well.  And even if he gets out, the trauma would realistically have a lasting affect on him.  Din, hurry your butt up and get yourself more Dad Points!

#sorry for delay these posts just take A Long Time to write #asks #anon #the mandalorian #baby yoda #the mandalorian spoilers #baby yoda meta

[luninosity]

Catching up on some @evanstanweek prompts (last week got busy!) - somewhat belated, but still fun!

Here’s day 5: alternate universe. Which my brain decided was...a space AU? With diplomat!Chris and courier ship captain!Seb?

Read at AO3 here (1,834 words, no warnings, adorable attraction and hand-touches) or read here on tumblr below!

#

Stars streak and flow and swirl along the swiftspace tunnel. They spin and flare and flood color through the viewing windows: white, red, golden, blue, against the dark joyous infinity of space. Chris Evans, as a Federated Planets diplomat and ambassador, has seen a lot of stars and a lot of space. The sheer delight of it all kicks him in the heart every time.

 He gets to be here. On adventures. Flying through darkness and light and beauty. Visiting new worlds, helping people solve problems.

 He wanders across the small upper observation lounge, weary and entranced.

 The courier ship’s sleek and graceful, a silver-grey water-bird with the jeweled light of the universe pooling along her skin. From this angle Chris can see her side, the line of her hull, as well; the view’s maybe not as entirely unrestricted as it would be from the larger more forward deck below, but he likes the connection right here.

 He gazes at the stars, and lets himself relax a fraction: sleeves shoved up, collar undone, hands in his pockets. Negotiations at his back. Peace achieved. Success.

 Maybe he grins at the stars, and maybe they grin back, but that’s okay: nobody else is here to witness their casual shared relief and giddiness. It’s relatively late—the middle of the night, according to ship’s time, anyway—and the observation lounge is quiet, up here.

 Except that’s not true. Because there’s a tiny chirp, pleasant and musical—and it’s not Chris’s communicator—

 He turns. The person who’d been settled into the large corner chair—not facing the door—bolts up hastily and silences the notification and says, “Apologies, Ambassador—” and Chris realizes all at once, a supernova to the gut, that that’s not just any person.

 That’s Sebastian Stan, or more accurately Captain Sebastian Stan.

 In command of this beautiful graceful Federated Planets courier ship. Here to ferry Chris back to the capital planet after negotiations. And so damn beautiful himself that Chris, experienced diplomat that he is, had forgotten how to talk for a good five seconds upon first meeting.

 Captain Stan’s got fluffy dark hair and bright eyes the color of morning mist over the geothermal lakes of Skystone. He’s nearly Chris’s height and nearly Chris’s age, human like Chris but raised on the colony world of Apa Sâmbetei; he’s young for a captain, though not so young that it’s wildly extraordinary, and he’s disarmingly sweet and enthusiastic and passionate in a heartfelt way, someone who talks about his ship and flying the stars as if he’ll never get tired of new missions and explorations, whether that’s as big as discovering a new nebula or as small as bringing a single diplomat back home for debriefing.

 And Chris had fallen head over heels—hopelessly, ridiculously, he knows—the second Captain Stan had run down the ramp at the spaceport and said, “Welcome aboard, Ambassador!” with cheerful disregard for formal impersonal protocol but equally cheerful enthusiasm about inviting Chris on board his ship for the next week.

 Chris’s heart’s always loved people who love the world. And Sebastian Stan so clearly does. So glorious, so vibrant.

 Two days in, they haven’t spoken much. That first brief welcome. Dinner at the captain’s table yesterday, which is in fact the only table, because Sebastian’s crew only numbers seven and they’re all friends. A quick encounter outside the rec-holo room that morning, Chris having asked if he could reserve some workout time and Captain Stan apparently just leaving, having been doing…something…in a clinging dark blue gym shirt and grey sweatpants, just before. He’d been flushed and sweat-damp and glowing; he’d obviously not been expecting Chris to show up ten minutes early. Chris had blurted out, “Sorry, sorry, I wasn’t interrupting—I thought it’d take longer to get here—” and then had wanted to bite off his own tongue for implying Sebastian’s ship was too small or too simple or whatever the hell he’d just managed to babble.

 “No, it’s fine, it’s all yours!” Sebastian’d said instantly. “I’m—I mean, we’re—I mean the Calliope’s at your disposal, Ambassador, of course—” He’d vanished into the lift Chris’d just exited, at that.

 Right now Sebastian looks on the verge of vanishing again: swinging boots to the deck’s carpet, picking up his communicator and tablet, plainly on the brink of getting up. “I didn’t mean to disturb you—”

 Chris says, “You were here first!” and holds up a hand, though he’s not even sure what the gesture’s supposed to mean. Stay? Wait? I’ll go? I’m sorry for barging in on your observation deck time? “And it’s your ship—I’ll just go, I just couldn’t sleep—”

 Sebastian’s smile’s sudden and complicated: wry, understanding, gently concerned. He gets up, but tosses communicator and tablet back down onto his chair: not leaving, then. When he comes to stand at Chris’s side, his eyes are very soft and warm, clear smoky shimmery grey-blue opals.

 He’s still mostly in uniform, though he’s unzipped the jacket and also pushed up both sleeves, and the navy-blue top and tight black undershirt and silver trim all frame his face and throat and body like an antique portrait-decoration. “That moment after a mission. And before the next one.”

 “Yeah.” Chris exhales, tries to remember to gaze at stars and not Captain Stan. “Like jumping off the wind-cliffs on Selene. Like sky-diving, in free-fall, knowing you’ve done everything right, you should land fine, but that minute right before you come down safe and sound, but there’s nothing left you can do now…But, look, I didn’t mean to interrupt you, I didn’t know anyone’d be here—”

 “You aren’t interrupting.” Sebastian shrugs, one-shouldered; glances out at the view. “I love this spot too. I always have. And I love the stars in motion. We’re going somewhere, doing something. On our way to help someone. The way you just did.”

 “I didn’t do all that much.” But he kind of likes the compliment, the glow it sparks in his bones. “Part of a whole delegation. We just got the factions in a room, got them to talk. They did the rest.”

 “But you did that,” Sebastian points out. “You gave them the space, the encouragement, the opening to speak and to listen. What you did…that’ll help end the war on Tacitara, and that’ll make life better for all their people. That’s important.”

 “Yeah,” Chris says. “I mean…yeah. I know. It is important. I just…”

 “You want to do more,” Sebastian says. “You want to help even more. More people, more worlds. Get them all to talk to each other.”

 “Well…yeah.” And those words, Sebastian’s words, disarm him. How can someone he’s barely met know him, see him, so well? From a moment alone with the stars, with the night?

 Sebastian’s smile quirks. “And you’re here. For a whole week. Stuck in transit, with nothing to do.”

 “I don’t mean it like that,” Chris protests.

 “I know.” Sebastian, looking Chris’s way, is outlined by star-streaks. They shine topaz and violet and sapphire in his hair, along his left cheekbone. “I get it.”

 A flash of memory surfaces; the Calliope, Chris recalls, had been one of the smaller ships bringing medical aid, and assisting in desperate evacuations, after the horrific planetary eruptions on Cronus. He hadn’t known her captain’s name at the time, or if he had he hadn’t remembered.

 Sebastian would’ve been several years younger then, maybe right out of the Flight Academy. Maybe even a first assignment.

 Those lapidary grey-blue eyes’ve seen a lot, behind sparkling youthful glee about space and courier missions. Probably as much, if not more, than Chris has in Federation negotiations.

 He says, “I know you do,” and he means it. “Thanks.”

 Sebastian now looks surprised. “For what?”

 “Um…talking to me?”

 “You said you couldn’t sleep.” Sebastian gives him a small head-tip: familiarity. “I get that sometimes too.”

 Chris winces again. “I really didn’t mean to interrupt you.”

 “You didn’t, I said.” Sebastian sighs. “Trying to write. Not that it’s working. I’m glad I was here, though. If you wanted someone to talk to.”

 “I’m glad you were here too.” He means that, also. “Writing?”

 “Ah.” Sebastian makes a face: half-abashed, half-amused at his own letting that out, self-deprecating but not exactly shy. “Not anything really…I mean, maybe someday…I just like telling stories, sort of…places I’ve been, people I’ve met, kind of fictionalized, kind of travel writing…sort of memoir…I’ve published a couple pieces, on the holonet…nothing big, though, just in my spare time…”

 Chris narrows his eyes at this dismissal. He’s a decent diplomat; he can tell when someone’s kicking sand over the truth. “Anything I’d know?”

 Sebastian laughs. “Not unless you read The Next Horizon’s creative contributor’s section on a dedicated basis.”

 “Yeah, the thing is,” Chris says, “literally billions of people on billions of planets read some version of The Next Horizon, that’s pretty much the biggest place you can contribute something, if you’re at all into literature and arts and writing,” and stares at Sebastian very hard.

 “It’s only three short pieces so far—”

 “Three?!”

 Sebastian’s cheeks get pink under the rainbow wash of swiftspace star-field color; he does a small head-duck and nose-scrunch and says, “Sorry?” as if that’s something to feel guilty about, and eyes the Calliope’s hull out the viewport like he’s longing for a spontaneous spacewalk.

 “Fuck,” Chris says, wholeheartedly impressed. “I mean…fuck. Wow.”

 Sebastian gets over embarrassment enough to laugh. “Nice diplomatic language, Ambassador.”

 “Chris,” Chris corrects. “Please.”

 And Sebastian’s eyes get even happier, even more luminous and shining. “Then it’s Sebastian. Definitely.”

 “Sebastian.”

 That earns a tiny lip-lick, a shift of weight: suddenly the room and the stars and Chris’s skin prickle with awareness. Sebastian’s looking at him, at the sound of his own name on Chris’s lips; Chris has found him beautiful already, but abruptly it’s real and sharp and thrumming like a plucked wire: Chris and Sebastian, together under space-light.

 “Chris,” Sebastian says.

 “Yeah?” Chris shifts weight as well. Closer to him. Enough to reach out and touch. And neither of them draws away.

 “I’m glad it was us,” Sebastian says. “Me. The closest available courier. For you.” His fingertips are near enough to brush Chris’s, in the next heartbeat.

 Chris turns his hand. Lets the touch happen: lets his skin drink in the feel of Sebastian’s fingers, the way they’re warm and curious and unafraid, moving to meet his.

 He thinks about starlight, and the week’s journey to Earth, and time to get to know Sebastian more, time to talk about words and stories and saving people. He thinks about debriefings, and some accumulated shore leave after that, before a next assignment.

 He wonders whether Sebastian’s got any stored-up leave also; he wonders whether Sebastian likes the ocean, or wind-cliffs, or quiet retreats in a snowy cabin with space to write and some cozy hand-made non-replicator hot chocolate, the way Chris’s mother taught him. He wants to find out.

 He says, under rushing flowing galactic kaleidoscope glow, with Sebastian’s fingers twining themselves into his, “I’m glad it was you, too.”

#evanstan #my fic #evanstan week 2021 #evanstan week #chris evans #sebastian stan #alternate universe #space au

[cummingforkylo]

Savage- Chapter Two (NSFW)

Read it on AO3

here we are, releasing chapter two of Savage...this one is fun if I do say so myself. Hopefully I can have chapter 3 up by the end of the week or next week sometime.

Savage

Chapter Two- Thirsty 

Rating: Explicit, this Chapter is NSFW

CW: Crackfic, Rough sex, angry sex

Chapter Summary: Kylo learns all about thirst traps, and becomes enraged when he realizes that Reader appreciates all the tiktoks made about him. He feels she needs to be put in her place because of this.

Word Count: 2,877

Panic surged through you as you watched the confusion and fury mix on his face. Remnants of excitement from when you thought he was about to punish you for dancing like that on tiktok were still coursing through you and you were trying to recover and figure out what you were going to say, before you could think of hat to say he was speaking again,

“Answer me.” His voice was strained, his jaw clenched shut. You were surprised he actually managed to get the words out, but you knew you needed to answer him before he became more enraged.

“I…I’m n-not entirely sure why people do it.” You said, that was obviously not going to do so you immediately kept going, “B-but it’s kind of a trend on Tiktok…”

“To  talk about me!?” He snarled, his eyes were on your phone, staring at the still image of the video.

“Not just talking about you…people make videos of you looking um…particularly handsome? And thirst after you-“

“I want this destroyed, I want to get rid of it. How dare they!? Are you putting things out there?!” Kylo’s head snapped around towards you, his eyes boring into you.

“No!” You said honestly, “You can go watch all of my videos if you want, I don’t ever mention you!”

“But you watch them,” His eyes went from studying your face back down to the video on your phone. For someone who knew absolutely nothing about tiktok, he was picking up on it fast. He seemed to understand that you’d only get videos on your For You Page that involved things that you already interacted with. You swallowed,

“N-Not really, I just-“

“I want to see some of the other videos.” He told you. You were sure the shock shown on your face because he seemed to register it there, his eyes darting over your face. “Now.” He added. You swallowed and with shaking fingers tapped the tag “KyloRen” that accompanied the video he had just seen. You clicked one of the more popular ones and handed him the phone. You couldn’t stomach watching with him, you knew he was going to get upset, you knew he was going to be angry at you for knowing this existed and not showing him. You sat cross legged facing Kylo, deciding to watch him instead of the video. You listened to the audio, it was from a song and it just went, ”For you, I’ma let ya hit it for free.” And you knew without watching it was just a bunch of pictures of Kylo. Kylo stared at the video, his brows contracted and you watched as his upper lip quivered. The audio started again and he just stared at the video again,

“Swipe up to see the next-“

Before you finished he had scrolled and started the next video, it was a different song, a little darker sounding and it was obviously more pictures and videos of Kylo. He kept scrolling, his face got stonier, his eyes darker, they sparkled with dangerous and excited fury. It was the look he got when he fought, when he was turned on. Your heart hammered in your chest as you watched him look through the videos. He disapproved but at the same time…he liked it. You could read it all over his face.

“What does…thirst mean?” Kylo asked, looking up from your phone. How was this the same man who often ordered you onto your knees, who taught you the meaning of pleasure and laughed when he had found out you had never been fucked before?

“Thirst?”

“Yes!” he growled impatiently.

“Um…It means like…like if someone is thirsty for you it means they’re like…horny for you?” You explained. You watched his eyes grow wide and he stared at you, as if he was shocked that you knew what it had meant and he hadn’t.

“Did you learn that from this?” he asked, gesturing to the phone. You almost giggled, he sounded ridiculous, you managed to hold it back though. You didn’t want that bight sparkle in his eyes to fade, that would only leave the anger and that was when Kylo became actually dangerous. You shifted a little towards him, wanting to temper his anger even more.

“Maybe,” you said quietly, you reached out for the phone to try and take it out of his hand but he pulled it away from you.

“This,” he said, shaking the phone in his hand, “Is disgusting and disrespectful.” He said. “And you enjoy it, don’t you?” He asked, there was a heated note in his voice, a almost purr at the ends of the words that immediately lit something inside of you. Not only did it light the excitement inside of you, it also made you a little triumphant. You knew he had liked the videos, you had seen it in his eyes. His ego was properly stroked by the ones he saw and that was the best thing you could hope for coming out of this. You smiled a little and shook your head,

“No…I just happen to see them.”

“Don’t lie. Not only are you putting yourself onto the holonet for anyone to look at, you’re participating in a disgusting trend of trying degrade your Supreme Leader.” He said. Before you could argue with him anymore, his hand shot out and grabbed your jaw, he dragged you forward on the bed so you were on your knees in front of him. He was sitting and bending to be level with you. “Dirty girl.” He growled. You made a noise that was similar to a little,

“Unf,” as you half struggled to get out of his grip, for whatever reason, you always felt like you had to struggle a little with him, just to prove that you still would. His hand redoubled its grip on your face, his fingers digging into your jaw.

“If you’re so thirsty for me, I’ll let you get me off,” He said. Kylo’s eyes were mesmerizing when they were like this, they were the only thing about him that gave away the tiniest hint of how he was really feeling. It was always mixed emotions though. Anger and excitement went hand in hand, rage and hurt went together too. Passion and joy were rare but they were always together. Now, he was teetering on the edge of excitement and rage, he was actually angry but he was channeling it into his lust which was the best way he could handle it, in your opinion.“If you do a good enough job, I won’t punish you for being a nasty little whore,” He snarled. Learning to read his eyes and speech patterns had taken a lot of pain, a lot of trial and error but you had managed and now you knew how to react. You let out a nervous little whine and his lip twitched towards a smirk, “Get going, slut. You’ve got some work to do, you’re going to ride me.” Your heart dropped and your stomach clenched. The last time you had been on top you felt like it had been a disaster; he had gotten frustrated by how hard it was for you to get the motion, by how long it took you to take his cock because of how big it felt inside of you and ended up flipping you over to fuck you until you cried. Now, you were supposed to get him off, by the way it sounded, he wouldn’t be willing to do any of the work.

Get him off or be punished. Kylo fell back against the pillows and instantly your hands dropped to his trousers, undoing them, tugging them down, your fingers grazing over the prominent bulge there. He was already hard, and you were getting wetter by the second at the idea of climbing on top of him and sinking down. You tried not to think about how you needed to do a good job or face his punishment which could range from fun to cruel. You tugged desperately at his trousers until you managed to get them down, his cock springing free and laying thick and heavy across his belly. Your mouth actually started to water at the site and you had to take a deep breath to control yourself.

“Desperate, girl?” He asked.

“Y-yes, sir.” You managed.

“Get up here, then.” He said. Instead of immediately crawling on top of him you slipped off the side of the bed, standing next to it. Kylo looked at you, he was about to open his mouth and order you back there but you reached up under your dress and tugged your underwear down and he smirked.

“Take it all off.” He said. Your face flushed, of course you had to undress when he remained fully clothed. His big hand had wrapped around his own hard cock, rubbing it in slow, languid motions, as if getting it as hard and as big as it could possibly be for you. You heart was hammering with nerves. You hesitated for a half a beat and his lip twitched up, “Strip. I want you naked.” He said. You pulled your dress off over your head and let it drop to the ground, “Thats better. Thats the way I like you.” That purr in his voice seemed to vibrate through your body.  You put on knee on the bed beside his hip and swung your other leg over him, sitting up on your knees.

“You could move your hips in those videos, I want to see it now.” He egged you on. You knew you had to get going, he was going to get impatient so you took his cock in your hand. It always surprised you how thick it felt in your hand, how heavy it was. You wrapped your fingers around it and rubbed it, squeezing a little as you pumped your hand up and down. Carefully you positioned yourself over it, it was challenging because of how small you were compared to him and how big his cock was. Kylo’s hands found your hips and he helped you for a second, lifting your hips a little so you could line the tip of his dick up with your entrance. His eyes shot to yours, trapping you in his gaze for a moment, embarrassment and fluttering excitement filled you as he stared you down,

“You’re cunt is already dripping onto my cock already, you filthy girl.” He growled. “This should be easy for you.” His hands dropped from your hips and you inched yourself down on his cock. The swollen head spread your lips as it started to press into you. Your stomach contracted and you gasped as you took it inside. Your pussy was twitching around it, wanting more. You let out a little gasp, you started to take more of the length. Even after all this time, all the times he had bent you over and fucked you as hard as he could, he still felt huge inside of you. Every time you had sex, when he first penetrated you it felt like he had to loosen you up all over again. Kylo seemed to be thinking the same thing because his eyes had fluttered and he groaned around a clenched jaw,

“You’re pussy is always so fucking tight, exactly like the first time I fucked you every single time.” You couldn’t help but smile as you pressed yourself down farther.

“Feels…so good…so big,” you gasped as you finally took all of it and you sat astride him with his cock buried all the way inside of you. You reveled in the feeling of it for a moment, your cunt clenched involuntarily around his cock and you shuddered. Kylo grunted and jerked his hips forward,

“Fuck,” he breathed, “This isn’t about you, whore. I want to see you bounce on my cock. Go.” He ordered and you started to rock your hips, moving them back and forth. It felt so good you wanted more, you wanted his fingers on your clit and you wanted to feel him rocking his hips into you but you knew it was up to you to get the feeling you needed so you moved your hips forward and back.

“Good girl,” he breathed, you blushed  at the compliment. Hearing those words spilling out of his mouth made you melt. You leaned forward a little, lifting your hips off his cock and then lowering them again. Kylo’s cock dragged out of you and then you brought yourself back down.

“Oh! Stars!” it felt so good like that, his hands reflexively grabbed at your hips, his fingers melting into your flesh.  You pushed back on his chest, your small hands splaying over the large spanse of his pale skin and you used it as leverage, bouncing up and down on his cock. Your tits bounced with each of your movements and his eyes were on you, he looked pleased with himself and he smirked as he saw you notice. He reached up and cupped your tits, his thumbs running over your hardened nipples. You shivered as he squeezed your breasts, pointer finger rand thumb closing over your nipple, twisting until you gasped with pain. Your face was red with need, with embarrassment and exertion.

“K-kylo!” You gasped, “Feels…so…oh stars!” You moaned. His smirk dropped from his face as he heard your moan,

“Don’t you fucking dare cum, slut.” He growled.

“I…i can’t- Oh…yes…” You didn’t think you’d actually come but before you could get another word out his arm had wrapped around your waist and flipped you over so you were on your back and he was over you.

“No, no, no, no!” you whined in frustration, wanting to stay on top, wanting to get him off like he had asked.

“Too late.” He growled. Kylo shoved himself all the way inside of you again, knocking the wind out of you. You gasped and he slammed himself into you, you could feel his huge cock stretching you open, pummeling against your cervix. You whined and threw your head back, gasping for breath.

“I wasn’t going to cum..I wasn’t-“ your voice sounded strangled and whiny. Kylo’s big hand covered your mouth,

“You were. I could hear it in your voice. You don’t even know your own body the way I do.” He growled. He grunted and pumped himself in and out, over and over. You could feel him tensing up, he was going to cum and it wouldn’t be because you had done what you were supposed to. You were bound to get punished for it. Maybe not now, but sometime soon. Kylo thrust himself deep inside of you and you could feel his cock spasm inside of you. You could feel the heat of his cum filling you and you gasped. He stayed inside of you for a moment and then slowly pulled away and lay back against the bed, his chest heaving. Everything was quiet for a while and you lay there, wishing you could ask for me, wishing you had the guts to ask if you’d be punished.

*

Only a couple hours later Kylo was putting his boots back on, readying himself to leave. He had slept ever since he had finished and now he was off to train again. This was how he was, only sleeping for a few hours at a time. You were watching him.

“Did you sleep at all?” he asked in a flat voice, like he didn’t necessarily care if you had.

“A little.” You mumbled.

“You should sleep now. I’ll be back later.” He glanced towards the door. You smiled to yourself, running your fingers over the blanket.

“To punish me?” You asked, your eyes snapping up to look at him.  It was a dangerous game to play, he hadn’t punished you immediately so you thought maybe you had gotten away with it. He stiffened for a moment and then turned back to you,

“Don’t test me.” He warned. You cocked an eyebrow and shrugged.

“Will you be in a tiktok with me?” You asked suddenly, another surefire way to test his nerves.

“What?” he asked, pausing as he picked up his gloves off of the table.

“We’d get so many views I think tiktok would explode if you were in a video with me, it could be anything you’d like. I could teach you a dance.” You suggested. He stared at you like you had gone completely insane.

“You’re fucking joking.” He said. You shrugged, still going from playing with a little bit of string on the blanket to looking at him and then back again. “There is no way. Not in this galaxy or any other.” He said. You watched him stomp towards the door but you noticed him glance back at you and there it was, the playful glint in his eyes, the smirk that played over his lips that  was reserved for only you. It disappeared a second later as he put his mask on and he marched out the door, leaving you alone with nothing but tiktok for entertainment.

#kylo ren #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x you #Kylo ren X reader fanfiction #star wars fanfiction #ben solo #fanfic:Savage #fanfiction #fanfic #reader insert #reader insert smut #kylo ren smut #writing

[evabellasworld]

Death of Mandalore

Chapter 10

AO3 Link | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

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Summary:  After murdering Chancellor Palpatine of the Galactic Republic, Vanya Doyvesky joined leagues with both Death Watch and Darth Maul, hoping to reclaim her Mandalorian warrior heritage. But with broken promises and betrayal against Death Watch and Maul’s crime syndicate, the former Mandalorian Jedi had to choose the right path not only for her but for Clan Doyvesky as well.

————————————————————————————

Carrying a tray of hot porridge and a cup of water, Vanya entered her cell and saw the Duchess contemplating the walls, with her hair loose. “Your meal, your Highness,” she knocked, as she showed her courtesy and placed them in front of the door. “It’s freshly-made in the kitchen.”

“I’m not hungry,” declined Satine, as she turned around, making Vanya avoid eye-contact with her.

“Well, just in case you are, I’ll be leaving them here,” insisted Vanya. “Besides, when was your last meal?

Her eyes pried. “You seem wounded tight, soldier. Are you alright?”

“I should get back to my duty,” she avoided her questions, averting from her. “I can’t keep my master for waiting too long anyways.”

As she shut her cell door, Satine got up, leaning closer to the glass. “I know you don’t want to do this,” she blurted out.

Vanya stopped dead in her tracks, her lips feeling dry. She was at a loss for words. “You’re a Jedi Master, am I right?”

“How did you know?” she stammered, shifting her focus towards her.

“That’s what Maul referred to you,” Satine told her. “I was aware that he freed you in exchange for giving you power on Mandalore. Is that true?”

“Well, he also promised me to avenge my sister’s death by killing Vizsla,” Vanya included,  bobbing her head. “I admit that he’s sketchy but at least he delivers his promise, unlike the latter.”

“Vanya, dear, do you actually want all of that? A Jedi never lusts for power and violence.”

She’s not lying, she clutched her fingers together, her lips pressed. “Regardless of that, at least my family has better treatment now.”

“But at what cost? You’re distanced from your parents, let alone your own sisters.”

“My sisters are fine,” Vanya riposted. “I get to spend more time with them than when I was a Jedi, who was bound to the dogmatic rules that discourage their followers to form a loving relationship with one another.”

Satine exhaled, reminiscing of her time with her former lover, realising that she cannot convince her. “Just be careful, alright? Your sisters can’t afford to lose another family member.”

Without saying a word, Vanya gave her a deep bow and headed towards the lift, leaving her alone. She was aware of the Duchess’s relationship with her younger sister and seeing them not getting along with each other saddened her. She could never imagine cutting ties with her own siblings, let alone her whole family.

Is this what I really wanted? she doubted herself, a drop of paint splattering on her chestplate. Is Vasilia really proud of us?

Staring at her Mandalorian helmet that she gained from Maul, Vanya reached for the brush next to her and gently painted the rim of the visor in crimson to complement his skin colour, and the lives of the people that he claimed with his blade that was forged from pure hatred.

The Doyvesky’s colour, on the other hand, was emerald green, which matches the colour of the crops that were ravaged by war and violence surrounding them. Though Mandalorians were once proud warriors that forged through the storm, they were also farmers, artisans, actors, and peacekeepers, just like the former Duchess.

Noticing her vacant stare towards her armour, Katrina and Maria exchanged a brief look with each other before the latter cleared her throat and tugged her sleeves, catching her attention. “You alright, Vanya?”

“Yeah, yeah, I'm alright,” she nodded, as she put down the brushes, before taking a larger one. “I'm just thinking about what to paint on my armour, that's all.”

Katrina raised her eyebrows. “I'm pretty sure Maul wanted the colour scheme to be the same. After all, we're supposed to be a unified army.”

“Well, I never liked the colour red,” Vanya shook her head. “They look like-”

“Yeah, we get it,” she interrupted. “Red is the colour of blood. It leaves a stain on crops and grasses, just like what Mama used to say.”

“Why can't we just colour our armour based on our clan? It's the Mandalorian way.”

“Like Bo said,” Maria spoke, her cheeks stained with red paint. “Maul's an outsider who claimed the throne of Mandalore from Vizsla.”

“Since when do you agree with Bo Karen?” Katrina puzzled. “You never even like her in the first place.”

“I don't, but she does have a point, though Mandalorian culture believes in adopting others from different worlds, which Death Watch do not practice at all.”

“Yeah, they only take the part of the law that they like,” Vanya agreed. “Like murdering people and burning their village to the ground.”

“True, though Maul isn't a better option either,” Katrina clarified. “After all, he's letting a bunch of crime families help run Mandalore and the Underworld.”

“How do you know that?” Maria asked, nonplussed.

“That's what Maul literally said to us earlier while we were in prison,” she slapped her own forehead. “Besides, Almec agreed to it through formal documents with his cabinet.”

“He picked his administration already?” Vanya gasped in an exaggerated manner, covering her mouth. “Oh, do tell us.”

Katrina looked left and right as she gestured to her sisters to lean closer to her. “Okay, so from what I've gathered so far,” she began, in a hushed tone. “The people of Mandalore have no contact with the others outside the planet.”

“Are you fucking serious?” Maria voiced underneath her breath. “You mean to tell me that the HoloNet isn't accessible to them?”

“Unfortunately yes, but that's not all. While domestic communications are allowed, their transmission is monitored, meaning the government is watching every move of the citizens twenty-four seven.”

“But hold on,” Vanya raised her finger. “That's not freedom, that's just-”

“Authoritarianism and dictatorship,” Katrina finished her sentence. “Maul and Almec are running a police state.”

“You know, I never realise Satine's government were great until we overthrow her and replaced them with a fucking dictatorship,” Maria considered, stroking her chin. “But that doesn't really mean that pacifism works one hundred percent though.”

“The only reason why it didn't work was because of us,” Katrina enunciated. “I mean, we were the ones who hired those things in the first place just to make Satine look incompetent.”

Vanya wiped the back of her neck, before taking a breath. “Okay, so what's our plan? How do we get out of this mess?”

“We could go back to Mama and Papa, just like what Vasilia wanted,” Katrina gave her a reminder, shrugging.

“Impossible,” Maria disagreed. “Maul might kill our entire family if he finds out.”

“Yeah, that is true,” Vanya breathed. “Anything else that doesn't involve death?”

“Fine, we'll go along with our duties like before and see how it goes,” Katrina suggested.

“You di'kut,” Maria cursed. “The last time we did that, Vasilia was murdered by Death Watch.”

“Yeah, and we figured that Death Watch wasn't our thing.”

“I hate to admit, but that's our only option right now,” Vanya gave in. “If we act now, Maul will not only have our heads, but our families as well so for now, we'll go back to our duties, and then when the time comes, we can execute our plans, alright?”

Maria let out a frustrating groan. “Fine, whatever. Let's just hope we have better options after this.”

#star wars #star wars ocs #star wars original characters #star wars fics #star wars fanfics #star wars fanfictions #darth maul #pre vizsla #bo katan kryze #obi-wan kenobi #satine #duchess satine #duchess satine kryze #jedi #jedi knight #jedi master #mandalorian #mandalorian jedi #mandalorian ocs #vanya doyvesky #obitine #obi wan x satine #palps is dead

[atamascolily]

okay, not quite finished with Aftermath: Empire’s End but here are some Opinions thus far:

turns out Mercurial Swift is such a metal name it has to be a pseudonym - his actual name is much less exciting. The good guys threaten his mom because they are gritty antiheroes who do the work that the NR doesn’t want to acknowledge and that’s how they roll. Except they keep not shooting Swift and then being surprised when he keeps showing up to interfere with their plans.

Han bringing so much jogan fruit to Leia because the doctor recc’ed it and he loves his wife so much and just doesn’t know how to handle all of his feels. <3!

okay, I know the Ben Solo stans argue that the darkness that Leia senses in those scenes is Snoke reaching out to corrupt him in the womb, but... the writing is awfully vague, and could mean literally whatever you want it to mean. It’s an interesting theory, but I feel like if that was actually meant to be canon, it needed to be a little more spelled out. (of course, it’s so hard to tease out what is canon and what isn’t with that character)

nobody likes Dengar, lol.

Apparently Lumpy is still canon! (IDK about the Star Wars Holiday Special, but... nice to see him re-united with his father, even if the whole situation on Kashyyyk remains a Colonialist Hot Mess. (thanks for nothing, New Republic!!)

there’s an interlude with Jar-Jar Binks of all people on Naboo - he got ostracized by the Gungans AND the humans, who hold him responsible for putting Palpatine in charge, which just seems so unfair and also really sad. Look, he’s not my favorite character, but can this guy ever get a break??

something something political shenanigans something something corruption something something crime syndicates

I enjoy that Space Customs becomes a major plot point.

we get to see a few of the characters from the previous “Interludes” again: Malakili the Hutt-tamer, that pirate queen who reminds me of Booster Terrik, the weird Vader cult on Corellia, the Cult of the Force returning kyber crystals to the “wild” (???). I guess my question is, what’s the payoff for all these digressions? Are they relevant to stuff later on in other tie-ins I haven’t read or are those just plot-threads that got dropped and never picked up again?

(I did appreciate seeing the HoloNet reporter come back in one scene in the main plot, though.)

(LANDO and LOBOT in Cloud City!! But WHY ISN’T LANDO WITH THE NR GOVERNMENT/MILITARY INSTEAD OF REVERTING BACK TO HIS OLD ROLE??)

Sinjir DOES have a heart after all, and he and his slicer boyfriend continue to be adorable.

(apparently THAT was what got the “fanboys” upset enough to harass Wendig on social media?? ughhhhhh. no wonder we haven’t seen any gay characters since. for shame, disney, for shame.)

(there are many things I do not appreciate about this novel but Sinjir and Conder and their relationship are one of the main highlights).

also, Sinjir and Mon Mothma have this great relationship which is SO FUCKING GOOD, I want to read a novel about this instead.

There’s literally nothing about Jakku that distinguishes it from Tatooine. They even have their own Hutt, Niima (who I guess Niima Outpost is named for in TFA? That’s random, but okay.)

Niima has this weird cult around her with face-painted acolytes with literally sealed lips and mechanical body parts and there’s a caravan through the desert, and it feels very much Mad Max: Fury Road to me.

Mr. Bones is so cool, so obviously he doesn’t get to survive.

likewise, Brentin is toast because Wendig wants his OC to hook with Wedge, sigh. (I have nothing against Wedge/Norra, but POLYAMORY IS A THING, too!)

Jas breaks her own bones to escape, and wins, we stan.

meanwhile, that figurehead on Coruscant nobody actually cares about is rescued by the so-called “Anklebiter Brigade,” (yes, REALLY), a group of feral street kids. um...

speaking of feral children, Galli Rax is so proud Brendol Hux has kidnapped all these kids and indoctrinated them to serve, so he orders them to murder all the trained actual stormtroopers, which they do, and THEN he hands their command over to Brendol’s son Armitage, whose first act is to immediately abuse his power over them. O...... kay.

(I have so many questions about this)

One of the Imp higher-ups sincerely believes that Palpatine is gonna come back from the grave and Galli Rax is all smug believing it to be a lie he’s using to control the dude... that aged well. ;)

I don’t think we needed this much backstory to explain Why Jakku Is Interesting After All, especially since Jakku ends up having almost no relevance to the larger plot of the ST at all.

everything about the Contingency continues to be really dumb, and it keeps being played for maximum drama and it’s annoying. I’m saving some of that rant for a separate post because it involves some wonky world-building fails.

#star wars #WHY DISNEY WHY

[hopegained]

@datapadz​: sending u a ship: this one [eyes emoji] | send me a ship and I’ll tell you | not accepting

Who’s more dominant: Eron definitely

Who’s the cuddler: Both, but more Gal than him. Gotta let him Trust you first before he even wants to cuddle or lets you.

Who’s the big spoon/little spoon: Gal’s the big spoon lbr here.

What’s their favorite non-sexual activity: Netflix (or HoloNet) and chill without the chill because Eron actually watches whatever’s on. Except when he dozes off. 

Who uses all the hot water: Gal tbh. 

Most trivial thing they fight over: When to go to the park with the dog for modern verses and the city living vs nature living in canon. 

Who does most of the cleaning: It’s equally divided between both of them. There’s not a lot of cleaning to be done at his place anyway.

What has a season pass on their dvr/Who controls the netflix queue: Oh this is right up Gal’s alley. Eron couldn’t care less what new show is on, mostly because he’s way too fucking busy to watch or binge.

Who calls up the super/landlord when the heat’s not working: Gal but Eron fixes it like it’s no big deal. Abolish landlords.

Who leaves their stuff around: Eron lmfao he misplaces them often.

Who remembers to buy the milk: Gal, I feel like. She knows her man is lactose intolerant and gets his fave nut-based milk.

Who remembers anniversaries: Canon Eron is better than his modern self at this and remembering things in general, but both verses have Gal being the winner here.

Who cooks normally: Neither lmfao like there’s not much to be done when you’re constantly jumping from one Resistance hideout to another, if we’re talking canon, but in modern it’s 50-50 when they’re not being shitty cooks. 

How often do they fight: Very rarely tbh. Even canon Eron with all his emo self, he never actually likes arguing with people, even if they’ve hurt him unspeakably.

What do they do when they’re away from each other: Eron busies himself with work and more work, either verse. Gal I feel like thinks about him more, but who is he to know?

Nicknames for each other: For Eron - the usual like honey and babe when they’re together, because he sucks at nicknames. Gal has more interesting ones for him.

Who is more likely to pay for dinner: Eron for sure. He hates feeling like he’s owed someone anything.

Who steals the covers at night: Lmfao Eron tbh. He cannot stand the cold!!! 

What would they get each other for gifts: Eron is a very practical person so it’s something Gal can wear or use for a long time, say a jacket or water bottle lmfaoooo. Gal is a bit more sentimental so she’d definitely gift him like a custom name plaque or something idk.

Who kissed who first: Oooh I think it depends, because Eron has one (1) fear - that she’d have feelings for him if he does it, but he doesn’t doesn’t do it. He’d kiss her to shut her up lbr.

Who made the first move: Gal. No further comment.

Who remembers things: Eron in general I guess?? Like it’s basically his responsibility to remember things in either verse.

Who started the relationship: Lmfao never Eron in a million years, so Gal.

Who cusses more: Eron of course.

What would they do if the other one was hurt: If Gal is physically hurt in canon, caused by external forces? My guy would go BATSHIT. In modern verses he doesn’t go to that length, just panics more. Gal is more calm if he’s the one hurt, so she’d do everything she can to help ease the pain. But I guess nobody really knows what to do or say when you’ve been hurt in other ways, like a heartbreak.  

Who is the dirty talker: Lmfao Eron I feel like bc he’s got a lot more experience in canon.

A head canon: Their house, modern or canon, definitely has a room for special occasions. Gal insists since she has her big ass family over like every two weeks.

#datapadz #you are the sun and i am just the planets (galya | datapadz) #(this is a fuckin LONG one whew) #(but yes it's Them) #long post #answered.

[rainofaugustsith]

I’ve been debating posting this because I know it may lead to anger (hell, I already walk on eggshells posting anything critical of a certain faction), and I don’t want that. On the other hand when I’m thinking about skipping characters and i will never skip them past certain expacs because of this, I feel like it’s worth discussing.

Arcann. And why I will never save him. It’s not a discussion of his morals or what he did or whether I like him or not, and it’s certainly not a commentary on whether YOU should like him, save him, romance him or create an entire fanfiction universe where your OC and Arcann rule.

This is just why I won’t.

I really don’t like the word “redeemed” or the way it is handled in SWTOR. “Redeemed” seems to mostly mean “be a Jedi/LS” which rather reminds me of certain religions that say you’re only “saved” if you accept their particular belief system, regardless of what you do with your life or what you believe or adhere to. 

Anyway, though, redemption and forgiveness do not mean you are obligated to interact with the person again. Or, they shouldn’t.

This is the major issue I have with Arcann. I am not going to get into all the “but Arcann did this” or “this character is worse” or “he does or doesn’t deserve redemption” because those conversations just piss everyone off and lead to fights. Arcann will never be saved in KOTET on any character I play for one reason: I do not think my Commander should have to be in close contact with her former assailant.

Arcann’s “redemption” or “second chance” or “justice” or whatever the fuck you want to call it should not be tied to you welcoming him to your Alliance or becoming his friend. Arcann could also have been “redeemed” or given a “second chance” or sent to prison far away from you. 

That’s not how the game sees it, though. You don’t have a chance to say “I’ll let you go, but I never want to see your face anywhere around here again.” The game sets it up so that in order to “redeem” Arcann, you are forced to give him a central place in your Alliance. You are expected to work side by side with someone who caused you direct and lasting physical harm and harmed your loved ones. 

You are expected to give him and his mother the places of trust that were held by your close advisors. Lana and Theron have been there for you since you met in your faction and on Manaan, which is seven or eight years by the time you get to KOTET, but they are brushed aside in the final chapter for Arcann and Senya.

And if you say “no, please, I really don’t want to work with someone who literally stabbed me and threw me into carbonite for five years” and “no, I really don’t want my assailant to take the place of the advisors I trust implicitly, who have never raised a hand to hurt me,” the game acts like you kick puppies for fun. They don’t even have you settle things directly with Arcann at first, you have to go through the scenes of Senya pleading for her son’s life, which makes it even worse.

That’s not fair. Not that life is fair, or games are fair, but I really don’t like the way this seems to suggest that a survivor of violence who decides they do not want to have a close personal relationship with their former attacker is doing something wrong.

Of course, they do this with Koth and Vaylin, too. I love Lana, but I think it’s very, very shitty that she brings Senya on board without asking anyone else for their input, knowing full well that Senya hunted and tried to hurt Koth. There’s no warning, there’s no discussion, boom, there she is. When Koth expresses anger, unease and suspicion of Senya, it’s blown off and he’s depicted in a negative light. He’s told, in no uncertain terms, to get over it. After all Senya’s not trying to hurt him now so it should all be water under the bridge, or so the game says. Never mind that this is a person who, in his words, “hunted him like a dog” for years. He’s supposed to be cool with her presence. 

Vaylin will not go with her mother at the end of KOTFE. Why should she? She has no reason to trust Senya, nor is she obligated to forgive or reconcile with her. Vaylin getting help should not have depended on Vaylin trusting or going with Senya and Arcann.

And from that we get “you’re beyond redemption” and humiliating Vaylin in front of the entire galaxy on live HoloNet by using her keyword, and the game doesn’t even give us a choice about that. Because she won’t make nice with Senya and Arcann there’s no way out for her, and that’s just not right.

I feel like we often, in fiction and in real life, put more pressure on the victims of violence to forgive and reconcile than we do the attackers to face the consequences of their actions. The consequence might mean that even if it’s family, they don’t want anything to do with you anymore. They should have that right.

#swtor critical #anti Senya #Anti Arcann #SWTOR

[inqorporeal]

That’s Not How Hyperspace Works

I’m gonna rant for a bit. Can I rant? Nevermind, gonna rant anyway.

I hate How current Star Wars creators have handled hyperspace.

Well, I hate how it’s handled in general, because in the years since the Prequel Trilogy (PT) came out, they’ve been breaking their own rules.

Let’s take a step back.

I’m not ranting about infeasibility and unrealistic science. Fictional worlds are 100% allowed to make up their own physics rules. The trick is that those rules need to remain consistent. If there is one thing George Lucas did right, it was expressing how hyperspace worked in the media he had a direct hand in creating: the Original Trilogy (OT) and the PT are absolutely consistent about it. All films and shows produced since the PT have repeatedly fucked things up. (Yes, Rogue One, I love you but you’re massively guilty of this.)

This is kinda long, so hit the cut for more.

Here are the established rules of hyperspace travel, as understood from the OT and PT material:

Standard Real World laws of physics apply -- light-speed travel is not possible by conventional means. E=mC² and you’re a pancake in space.

Hyperspace travel bypasses the limitations of conventional physics

Hyperspace is affected by gravitational fields

Hyperspace travel happens in Real Time (meaning the time a traveler perceives as passing whilst in Hyperspace is identical to the time someone in Realspace perceives the traveler spending in transit)

It still takes time to travel from Point A to Point B

Hyperspace travel rarely happens in a straight line from Point A to Point B due to the presence of subspace anomalies and gravity wells.

The presence of hyperspace obstructions is more concentrated the closer one gets to the Core, and less concentrated towards the Rim, meaning hyperspace travel between outlying systems can theoretically be somewhat faster due to more direct hyperspace routes

In the OT, there’s no indication of how much time is spent traveling in hyperspace. However, the time spent IN hyperspace is not crucial to the plot, and as such, there’s little point in actively showing life onboard the starships whilst in transit.

In A New Hope, we don’t know how much time passes between the Millennium Falcon departing Tatooine on the Outer Rim and reaching Alderaan in the Core, but it’s intimated that there’s at least a couple days of travel: long enough that Ben doesn’t have to talk Luke through the few simple training exercises and Han doesn’t express outright shock at walking into the lounge to see a lit lightsaber. In the system I use for gauging travel time in FtRP -- which I will happily acknowledge is not canon* -- the fastest they could get there is roughly two and a half days, making use of the known hyperlane routes and some fancy flying by Han and Chewbacca to evade Imperial patrols at the points where they would have to drop out and course-correct. We know that Alderaan is destroyed during the last few hours of their journey, because that’s when Ben feels it. Later, the Death Star arrives in the Yavin system a comparable time after the Millennium Falcon does, and a bit further toward the system’s outer reaches (for a number of reasons up to and including the mass of the Death Star making it more subject to stellar gravity wells and thus requiring greater caution). Again, there’s no indication of how long the trip takes (my calculations say a bit shy of two days, but again, it’s not important to the plot).

A notable point where distance between worlds is actually rather important is in Attack of the Clones where Obi-Wan tries to send a message back to the Temple from Geonosis -- but without access to a signal-booster, his message doesn’t get much further than Tatooine (this is discussed in greater detail in The Droids Have Ears). If you look up any Star Wars galaxy map, the two systems are practically on top of each other -- still light years apart, but space is 3-dimensional in a manner the 2-D maps can’t properly express. It still takes a rescue team almost three days to get to Geonosis from Coruscant, and that’s with Yoda already having a head start on his way to Kamino after Obi-Wan’s previous communication. It might seem a long time to wait to hold a public execution, but if one wants to make a political statement of it -- as the Separatists under Dooku intended to -- there are certain preparations to be made, and a three-day delay isn't unfeasible.

And then the Clone Wars series and later films just throw all concept of how hyperspace works out the window. The Clone Wars makes a big deal over the hyperlanes and access to them; the later films either ignore travel time (Rogue One, ignoring a full day of travel between Yavin and Scarif), express a complete ignorance of physics by the creators (The Force Awakens), or just make a complete hash out of everything (The Last Jedi). Additionally, I was playing through the Shadow of Revan story in SWTOR and nearly tore my mohawk out over the assertion that hyperlane routes were being “changed” by heavy amounts of starship traffic.

Let’s start with the hyperlanes. What is a hyperlane, exactly? If you look up the resources online, most of which come from the old tabletop RPG, hyperlanes snake across the galaxy map seemingly at random, like highways on a map. They look pretty immutable, right?

A hyperlane is not a highway.

A hyperlane is not a fixed tunnel in hyperspace.

It is not possible to blockade a hyperlane.

It is not possible to change the path of a hyperlane via artificially inflating the traffic concentration

What a hyperlane is, is a well-mapped, established route that takes the shortest path between one point and another while avoiding obstructions.

A hyperlane is space!parkour. And just like regular parkour, a skilled navigator can plan their own routes, which might actually be faster, if a bit more risky. See, things in space aren't static: every object in space is continuously in motion, and thanks to gravity and inertia, everything is largely moving at the same rate in the same direction. But there are shifts, and by necessity there would be survey teams constantly updating the safest paths around objects in space, uploading the data to the HoloNet so that ships don't accidentally hit something unpleasant. If you're making up entirely new routes, you're playing with chance, but a good navigator takes those survey teams’ results into account.

When a ship enters hyperspace, it slides from the realspace dimension into a coterminate alternate dimension where matter reacts differently, enabling transit at speeds far outstripping that of light. Anything that falls off or is ejected from a ship in hyperspace falls back into realspace immediately. A ship may leave hyperspace at any time, although to do so without having reached a pre-set coordinate is risky. A ship my enter hyperspace from any point which is not being affected by a localised gravity well. A surprise localised gravity well such as that produced by an interdiction field or unanticipated stellar event will interrupt a ship’s transit in hyperspace, and prevent the ship from re-entering hyperspace until the ship has moved beyond the gravity well’s affect zone.

Communication is slightly different: the hyperspace beacons that enable HoloNet and other communications are set in a hyper-spatial state but in a fixed location. As has been established, ships in hyperspace cannot send or receive communications, but the beacons function by opening a tunnel -- effectively a tiny wormhole -- between two beacons and sending the information as a string of pulses between the fixed points. Because this method of transfer differs from physical hyperspace transit, it is possible to experience only the shortest of delays in communication with even the furthest-flung locations, while one still requires several days to cross the same distance physically.

Now that that’s established, let’s discuss the feasibility of a blockade.

Space

Is

Vast

You have no idea how vast it is.

To get a sense of perspective, let’s look at a smaller blockade first: the invasion of Naboo. Naboo’s diameter is 12,120 km. For reference, Earth’s diameter is 12,756km. So it’s about Earth-sized, a bit smaller. If you want to prevent a ship from getting onto a planet and you don’t have the benefit of a planetary defense shield, you need ships. Lots of ships. More than that. A bit more.

See, Star Wars weapons have a range limit. In theory, a weapon's discharge in null-gravity vacuum will continue off into nothingness at exactly the same power as it had when it left the weapon, but sci-fi!physics doesn’t address this because then you’d have to take into account what the advanced effects of where, like, several zillion free-flying blaster bolts fired over the course of millennia eventually hit, and that just gets a bit silly. So we fudge it and assume things are designed to dissipate. So you want to position your largest ships in such a way that their firing range overlaps. Then you fill the space between with smaller ships to intercept anyone trying to get through. You want to do this within range of the planet’s gravity well, so that anyone trying to get through the net can’t simply jump to hyperspace and escape. The whole point is to prevent people from getting in or out, so you want more ships -- faster ships -- on patrol beyond the gravity well’s influence to shoot down anyone who gets out past the blockade net.

Now, Naboo’s surface area is 461,482,000km². Turbolasers are often used in planetary bombardment, so we’ll estimate that their outside range before they start losing energy is 300km. Maybe 500km at most. You want these ships to have a good overlap, so say you park them 500km apart from each other, evenly spaced. In order to park enough Lucrehulk-class battleships over Naboo to make an effective blockade, you need 922,964 ships. That’s just the battleships, not including the smaller ships needed to complete the net.

That’s ludicrous.

In the film, they only show a few ships in one location, as if all incoming vessels will only approach from one place. This is also ludicrous, for the reasons stated earlier. Space is a 3-D environment and you have to account for this.

That being established, let’s talk about hyperlane access.

Hyperlanes are subject to gravity wells, and using gravity wells to slingshot past or around a star or anomaly will reduce some of the fuel demand. It is often completely unnecessary to drop out of hyperspace at every system a route passes. The only times it would truly matter are if the route changes direction from one established hyperlane to another or if the system one needs to reach is nowhere near an established route. Again, space is three-dimensional, and such a shift might require some travel via subspace to another point in the system before the ship can enter hyperspace in the new direction.

For safety’s sake, most systems would have predesignated coordinates for ships dropping out of hyperspace on approach; these coordinates will be rather far from the populated planets, likely above or below the orbital plane so as to avoid the orbital paths of other planets, and in such places where space debris and asteroid belts do not pose a hazard. The further out from the high-traffic areas you enter, the less chance there is of accidentally colliding with another inbound ship. Again: Space is Vast. These are merely advised coordinates, of course: a ship can drop out of hyperspace anywhere. Ships departing a planet will often enter hyperspace shortly after escaping the planet’s gravity well, and this is actually a good thing: it clears the local subspace area quickly. Systems with exceptionally high traffic will have a traffic-control system to prevent collisions.

Without the aid of an interdiction device -- creating an artificial gravity well at the place where ships are most likely to pass through on their approach or journey past -- there is no way to actually stop ships entering a system or traveling past in hyperspace. A blockade might lurk in the predesignated entry coordinates and hope they can tractor a ship in, or they might lie in wait along the subspace approach route to the inner system, but their efficacy fails if the target ships’ pilots know what they’re doing and use custom coordinates.

During the Clone Wars, nobody is using interdiction devices. They did exist, but the energy demands were prohibitive. The Republic started funding research into making them more feasible, but only the Empire benefited, and they still couldn’t devise them such that an entire system might become impassible.

The stress during the Clone Wars about not being able to move ships and supplies along the trade lanes/hyperlanes is genuinely pointless, because there is literally nothing that can stop them from using the established routes or calculating new ones.

What they should have been concerned about regarding the trade lanes, were planets that had provided staple goods to much of the galaxy either seceding or being invaded, thus harming more vulnerable worlds which relied on those goods and cutting off the entire army off from essentials needed to extend the war.

But nobody likes discussing politics in Star Wars, right?

And then the new films have come out and just… made an absolute shitfest of the established world physics. Throwing the old EU/Legends/canon out seems to also extend to how the hyperphysics function.

The explanation given by Pablo Hidalgo for the way Starkiller Base’s weapons discharge is shown -- “What they're seeing is some weird hand-wavy hyperspace rip. Side-effect of the Starkiller." -- is utter bullshit. Light still travels the same way in Star Wars as it does in the Real World; given the locations of Takodana (J-16), the SKB (G-7), and the Hosnian system (M-12), nobody on Takodana would see anything for thousands of years. A “hyperspace rip” cannot account for realspace physics. Never mind that the SKB superlaser would have to contend with the massive cluster of black holes in the galactic center on its way to Hosnian, which would play merry hell with their targeting.

Also, you cannot convince me that Starkiller Base is not actually Ilum. (Edit: It’s since been confirmed in Jedi: Fallen Order that the SKB is Ilum. I feel vindicated.)

Crait and Cantonica are on opposite ends of the galaxy from each other. Even supposing Finn and Rose found a straight-shot route between them, it would take days to travel one-way. The least the creators could have done is hand-wavied some highly experimental ship for it, but all they proved is that they have no fucking idea how Star Wars’ physics work. There's a massive difference between fictional science technobabble and effectively saying, “we just didn't want to admit that the established setup was inconvenient, so just assume it works.”

Hand-waves only work if you have actual intent behind them.

Han and Chewbacca couldn't have simply shown up as soon as the Falcon left Jakku; not unless they were already in that part of space (I dunno, could have been the Force, because that really is how it works). But that, coupled with the pirate gangs also appearing right then, is completely improbable. If a ship can be tracked and jumped to as easily as Han’s ship was tracked by some asshole pirates, then the entire pursuit plot of The Last Jedi is completely pointless. Regardless of how Kylo feels about Han, he wouldn’t have given the First Order’s secret weapon away.

Likewise, there's no way reinforcements from Yavin could have reached Scarif in time. The main story of R1 should have taken at least a month, considering Jedha is way the fuck out in the middle of nowhere without a mapped hyperlane at all.

It's exciting science fiction, but the way the recent media have depicted hyperspace is just bad writing, which is shocking and disappointing coming from creators who have an established background in sci-fi.

The only reason hyperspace travel in the games is instantaneous is because players would get bored waiting.

*When I gauge hyperspace travel in FtRP, I make heavy use of the SWCombine nav map (which is intended for use with the SW tabletop RPG) in conjunction with the Star Wars Galaxy Map. It’s not perfect by any means, but it keeps things consistent.

Star Wars images courtesy of https://starwars.fandom.com/ Andromeda image courtesy of https://www.sciencenews.org/

#star wars #star wars meta #sci-fi!physics

[pumpkin-lith]

So, basically, the thing was, it all starts on a beautiful Senate day. Palpatine is walking with some random Senator, and he needs for that conversation to keep going so, let's not take the lifts, haha, let's walk down those stairs.

And nobody uses the stairs, right, they're all lazy and/or busy, lifts are faster, so if you use the stairs, you're either somewhat claustrophobic, don't fit inside the humanoids or even the larger/taller ones, have a tryst with your lover who might or might not be a Jedi, or maybe you just want a quiet place to take your lunch.

But point is, nobody uses the stairs much so the cleaning droids, they have so much to do, have you seen the size of the Senate, they keep the cleaning of all those unused stairs for way late at night on weekends when aaaalll the rest is done or don't need constant maintenance.

So say, if there's a slice of tomato on a stair, because someone packed up their lunch a little fast because _some_ people have no shame, doing that just above their salad, it would just… stay there, for hours, until Chancellor Palpatine and Random Senator walk by.

And, don't get me wrong, love the Naboo fashion, but man, those robes and collars…

There's no way Palpatine sees that small little slice of tomato and Woops he goes.

And on one hand, he's a Sith, yes, powers, super agility to do that triple side somersault, he could recover like that. snaps

But on the other hand, he's posing as Old Man Sheev Palpatine, and, say, the door just opened on a Jedi Master looking for his wayward Padawan soon to be Knight because he heard he just might be in that staircase, so if Force use there is to avoid the fall, the Jedi will feel it and his carefully engineered war just started, that would be the most stupid way to be found out, right ?

And, really, all things considered what harm can a little fall do, there will be exactly two people to see him fall, one is a Random Senator that he needs for this or that bill but is otherwise of no importance and will never dare laugh about the Chancellor and a Jedi who's too damn nice to dare mock an old man, yes ?

So, he lets the fall by tomato slice happen.

And. Hits. His. Head.

And here is the thing : when he wakes up, he's completely amnesiac \0/.

No memories, no background and certainly not Sidious.

There's all these well wishers and people calling him Chancellor and being nice and worried but he has no clue, and no relative, no wife, to help with recovering his memories.

But, lucky him, he’s a public figure, he even has two or three biographies written about him, great !

Look, you can't tell me that, even without considering he's a Sith named Sidious, a politician of Palpatine’s caliber doesn't have 1) several books written about him and 2) made damn sure he knew exactly what was in those, and how the Galaxy saw him through them.

Palpatine, His Life, His Work, by Totally A Non-Influenced Author I Swear Cross My Heart.

So what Amnesiac By Tomato!Palpatine can find about his own life, his own motivations and goals, is the official backstory he so carefully crafted himself.

So, we're like, mhh, not that long after Geonosis, the War has started and some people in the Senate are seeing different shades in the colors Palpatine is showing with emergency powers being around and the Army bill passing because, hey, actually, we do have an Army…

But all of that is fresh, no books on that ! Press articles, sure, but the biographies, so far, they're all showing the same basic facts, and those include :

He’s from Naboo, there's probably stories about how his Good, Rich, Upstanding family was Wholesome and full of Values he inherited

Became a Senator and, when the young Queen from his homeworld came to ask for help after an Invasion, he Stepped Up and became Chancellor to Help the Downtrodden

That Queen ended up a Senator after her Tenure and he was her Mentor in the Senate as a Good, Benevolent Grandfatherlike Figure

Someone Likes Capitalizing Stuff Too Much

And sure, he may be amnesiac but he still has (most) of his brainpower, so he'd look for other sources, look up the HoloNet (after enabling Safe Search, what is even that SheevBinks ship, Jesus people), see some nuances, some saying that he's a true friend and ally to the Jedi Order, some saying he's just another corrupt politician, some saying he's the reincarnation of a 300 year old eggplant deity from Felucia because it's the space internet.

But mostly, Sidious did his cover up good, especially at that point in time, he appears as a Political, slightly better dressed version of Santa.

And of the two people who could shed some (Dark) light into this, let's say Amedda choked to death that morning (on a tomato, of course), so sad, and Dooku can't exactly walk into the hospital to get the facts straight now, can he.

On the list of People who can actually visit, there will be two important ones :

First, Anakin puppy eyed newly or about to be Knighted, very newly wedded, riding that Honeymoon Vibe.

Who is so gonna tell their Friend and Father Figure Daddy Palpatine how good a human being he is, how full of advice, how they talked a lot for years about ending slavery and that Peace is Good.

And Padmé Protégée Naberrie Amidala who would be a little more careful and admitting that they had some differences but, the War just started and can maybe still be stopped with negotiations, but for that, they need a ruling body who can negotiates and she sympathizes with Palpatine's current ailment but surely, he sees that right now, he cannot be Chancellor to the Republic, yes ?

So, so far, Tomato Brain here is not sure of much but he does have a few facts that seem to be stuff people agree on : he's grandfatherly, he gives good advice, he's mostly a Good person who likes Peace and he does the Right Thing when it's time to step up.

So he does just that. The Good, Right Thing for the Republic he's apparently spent his whole life serving.

He steps down from the Chancellor mantle. And, while waiting for elections to be able to be held, and given that Vice Chancellor Amedda sadly died last day of tomato choking, his last act is to appoint Senator Amidala as Acting Chancellor in the meantime.

It makes sense, my dear, don't be so surprised, I'm an old, injured man with no memories, and you've been a good friend and are a good person, both according to everyone and from what I saw personally. It's like I can feel it by some way, crazy, I know, but don't worry, you'll take good care of the Republic.

And then he decides to retire on Naboo, he read he has a nice vacation house on his Estate, and all this talk about tomatoes made him think he might just like growing his own garden.

And this is a happy, cracky verse, (if you don't think this is crack, you haven't been paying attention) so nothing goes wrong.

There is no Evil Diary of Sidious hidden somewhere, nothing Dark in that vacation home, it was basically a front so it's closer to an Ikea showroom than an Evil Lair, he settles in nicely for his nice retirement on a very comfy pension.

Though he doesn't need all of that money, does he, let's also give to charities and to people working against slavery, because apparently, that's what he used to do, and it does seem like a Good Thing.

And Dooku, let's not forget our second Sith Lord. Now, Sidious is away from the main media eye, away from Coruscant, it would be easy to go to him and tell him the truth…

But why in the seven hells would he.

Let's remember that Dooku joined the Dark Side initially because he felt the Jedi wouldn't, couldn't do fuck about Sidious, that the only way would be to find the Sith Master and join him to stab him in the back. And he Fell along the way and stuff, but in the beginning of it all, he had  let's say, Good Motivations, Not Very Good Plan.

But this IS the beginning. And Apart from Geonosis, the War is now stalling, because there is no puppet master, no shadow leader, no Great Big Bad Plan behind it all and someone playing chess with all the Galaxy as his pawns, black AND white.

There is just the Republic on one Side, Dooku and the CiS on the other, and Sidious is planting tomatoes as a hobby.

So, Dooku can go back to his own true love too. Politics. (Yurk. But whatever rocks your boat, man)

And, so, why don't we talk about this like civilized beings, hmm ?

Surely, the Republic isn't a Tyranny not letting people pick another way ?

It's talks or a war, what do you pick ?

So.

No war.

Lots of Politics, I'm sure Dooku and Padmé and Satine and assorted madbeings are living, there's bills and conferences and cabinets meetings and sessions everywhere, THIS is my version of Hell but it works out.

And, because it's me, let's talk about the clones.

There's Now a couple millions guys for an Army that is actually not needed, Chancellor never even got the time to ratify that bill, sorry, so actually you're not even the GAR, at most you're, like, the GA, maybe ?

But you know who is understaffed, just lost a good dozens members and often act as Senatorial envoyees to dangerous places ? The Jedi. Who you want to serve anyway ! Great.

So the Jedi take custody of the GA, and well, it's not an Army innit, the Jedi can't have an Army, and we're not going to call them the G, that's stupid, so they became a branch of the Jedi Corps, Protection and Escort and Badass Looking or something like that, they go with Jedi everywhere, make sure no Jedi die or is injured or kidnapped or enslaved or goes off to join a civil war or anything. Keep their Jedi safe and protected everywhere. Good stuff.

While Palpatine plants his tomatoes.

And, to wrap this up, let's say, ten years down the line, when little Luke and little Leia become Padawans, the ripple in the Force lights up the whole Galaxy so much an old man with a strawhat in his field of tomatoes remembers.

And Darth fucking Sidious realises he wasted a century long conspiracy crafted by all his line of Siths, gave his puppet Senator his actual job of Leader, she's married to his Carefully Groomed Apprentice who is now Happy Light Daddy, he gifted his biggest enemies with an Army who is now protecting them, the Order is flourishing, Republic and CiS are allies and in harmony, the Galaxy is so Light it burns and he's known as a Good Old Man giving most of his wealth to charities and who is making tomatoes preserves.

And Sidious dies of an aneurysm, in his field of tomatoes (which, unfortunately, might actually burn down if he does explode. Those good tomatoes, so sad.)

#star wars #complete crack #palpatine defeated by tomatoes #april's fools #my writing #bullet point fic