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#hyperfixation won today
hop3isaprison · 2 months
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decaying.
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bardace · 2 months
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THEY SAW MY ART
HOLYYYYYYY MOLYYYYY DUDE I’M SO HAPPY AND ALSO TERRIFIED
drawtectives and secret sleepover society has been kind of the crutch I’m leaning on mental health wise as I recover from surgery so this is. Incredible. I almost cried.
and to @toddfrom in the chat, who brought it to their attention: thank you so much and also fuck you that scared the shit out of me
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rawrftzek · 1 year
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i have come to the realization that i very much like egg colors
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mushtoons · 2 years
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me, a kid with unchecked anger issues and ptsd watching tmnt:
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me now, after years of working on myself watching rottmnt:
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falafelvstheworld · 1 year
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i'm thinking about how ofmd, good omens and wwdits could potentially come out all in summer of 2023. I might become insufferable but i will be happy.
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raviolitin · 5 months
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It just hit me, David’s life long obsession with the idea of having a son is because of the fact he never had a positive father figure, isn’t it?
His family never had a chance, his mother was widowed and he was left fatherless - no wonder he wants a son so badly. And when he finally has a chance of having one, all he can do is have this intense anxiety about the fact he may not be a good father - A very, very real experience of many people irl.
This is probably so much worse after Murder Most Foul, because now he doesn’t even have the comfort of the fact his father was a bad or weak person and that that was the reason he died. Now he has to live with the fact that his father fought as hard as he could until the end and yet he still had his family torn apart, and that the exact same thing could happen to him - leaving his family with a tarnished view of him.
You can see it in how he wants to protect his family to an almost unhealthy degree, is it because his father never did? Is he writing the wrongs of the past?
In the dreamshade arc, he’s ok with dying as long as his family doesn’t remember him as a coward, because he doesn’t want his daughter to think of him how he thinks of his father or his wife to think of him how his mother thinks of her husband. He’d rather lie to them than die like his father did or have his memory live on in the way his father’s does.
He says himself in the deleted scene from Good Form, “If I'm going to die, I'll do it with honour. Honour transcends death.” And it's a very real sentiment he seems to carry and probably one that, in retrospect, mostly stems from the fact that his father died dishonourably and that is the legacy he'll forever be remembered with.
David’s character is so interesting and I'll never forgive the fandom for making him so underrated and literally never talking about his trauma unless it's relevant to Murder Most Foul.
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hoperays-song · 1 year
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Sing Warrior Cats AU PT: 1 - Allegiances Pages
Ok, so this started as a random idea at approximately 6 in the afternoon two days ago. I have since become *slightly* hyperfixated on this AU and made up at least a trilogy storyline and a ton of information for this. I also pulled several near all nighters that I was yelled at for by my lovely mutuals (who are gonna pretend that they enjoy me spamming the with random warrior names). And after all that, I give you Moonclan or our Calatonia group and Sunclan, our Redshore group!
Now, warning, to make this a logical (well as logical as warriors can be), there will be relationships between characters that I do not express in any of my other works (ie. Hobbs being Nana’s brother) and OCs to fill out the Redshore group from seven-ish people.
I hope y’all all enjoy!!!
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Moonclan
Leader: Nightstar (Nana Noodleman) A tall black she-cat with dark amber eyes and a greying muzzle.
Deputy: Moonspring (Buster) A small light grey tom with white around his muzzle and on his chest with a dark grey patch and pale blue eyes.
          Apprentice: Fawnpaw (Mizuki) A lanky light brown spotted cat with a white chest and amber eyes.
Medicine Cat: Larkeye (Mrs. Crawly) A sandy grey she-cat with a greying muzzle and one green eye.
           Apprentice: Wishpaw (Meena) A tall light grey she-cat with a splash of white on her chest and ears and blue eyes.
Warriors:
Lionfang (Clay Calloway) A broad-shouldered lion like tom with blue eyes and a scarred muzzle.
           Apprentice: Ashpaw (Ash) A dark brown she-cat with lighter stripes and blue eyes.
Pidgeontuft (Hobbs) A black tom with a white chest and underbelly with yellow eyes.
Emberspot (Eddie’s Mom) A dark grey tabby she-cat with yellow eyes.
Hootfur (Eddie’s Dad) A white fluffy tom with grey splashes and amber eyes.
Duskstorm (Marcus) A large black tom with dark greyish eyes and scars.
Adderfrost (Stan) A large grey tabby tom with scars and yellow eyes.
Dapplewing (Meena’s Mom) A tall brown and grey dappled she-cat with blue eyes and a white chest.
Crowrunner (Barry) A dark grey tom with black paws and ears and amber eyes.
           Apprentice: Lightningpaw (Johnny) A black tom with dark brown and grey spots, a flash of white on his chest, and golden eyes.
Fuzzycloud (Eddie Noodleman) A tall white tom with fluffy white fur and yellow eyes.
Frogpelt (Norman) A pale brown tom with a lighter chest and yellow eyes.
Goldenflame (Gunter) A large golden tabby tom with a white chest and ear tips and blue eyes.
Sunblaze (Gunter’s Sister) A yellow tabby she-cat with a white chest and blue eyes.
Mouseburr (Mike) A small white tom with amber eyes.
Pinedapple (Mizuki’s Girlfriend) A tall brown she-cat with amber eyes.
Spikefur (Lance) A brown tabby tom with green eyes.
Queens:
Rosestep (Rosita) A dark cream she-cat with pale yellow patches and green eyes.
Kits: 
          Creekkit (Caspar) A light brown tom with a white chest and green eyes
          Beekit (Gail) A brown she-cat with blue eyes and a darker patch on her ears and chest
          Acornkit (Rory) A brown tom with a cream on his paws and ears with blue eyes
          Honeykit (Tess) A yellow she-cat with white and cream patches and green eyes
Elders:
Lizardsplash (Herman) A ginger tom with a grey muzzle and green eyes.
Jaythistle (Meena’s Grandfather) A large dark grey tabby tom with yellow eyes.
Mintear (Meena’s Grandmother) A grey she cat with white ears and green eyes.
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Sunclan
Leader: Wolfstar (Jimmy Crystal): A large scarred white tom with ice blue eyes.
Deputy: Shrewnose (Jerry): A small brown tabby tom with green eyes.
Medicine Cat: Sorrelleaf (Suki Lane): A tall reddish-brown she-cat with darker patches and a lighter underbelly with yellow eyes.
Warriors:
Kiteclaw (Klaus Kickenclobber): A greying yellow tom with a long tail and amber eyes.
           Apprentice: Tigerpaw (Ryan): A lanky tiger like tom with white splashes in his chest and face with green eyes.
Mapleclaw (Ryan’s Godmother): A pale yellow she-cat with red paws and tail tip with blue eyes.
Robinpelt (Alfonso’s Mom): A dark brown she-cat with lighter paws and amber eyes.
          Apprentice: Pouncepaw (Porsha Crystal): A blue-grey she-cat with white on her chest, face, and paws and amber eyes.
Birchfire (Ryan’s Mom): A tall black she-cat with dark brown spots and amber eyes.
Quailwing (Alfonso’s Dad): A large white and dark grey spotted tom with blue eyes.
Swiftflight (Ryan’s Godbrother): A yellow and red tom with a few flecks of white and blue eyes.
Drizzlefrost (Suki’s Assistant): A dark brown she-cat with dark grey spots and amber eyes.
           Apprentice: Puddlepaw (Alfonso’s Sister): A white she-cat with brown spots on her back and yellow eyes.
Willowmist (Ryan’s Godsister-in-law): A lithe dark grey and silver she-cat with yellow eyes.
Rainfoot (Alfonso’s Brother): A large dark grey tom with a flash of white on his chest and blue eyes.
Shellfall (Ryan’s Classmate): A light brown tom with amber eyes and yellow paws.
Archstrike (Ryan’s Classmate): A dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes and a grey flash on his chest.
           Apprentice: Pricklepaw (Ryan’s Classmate): A black tom with red spots and yellow eyes.
Rowanjaw (Nooshy’s Brother): A dark silver tom with a lighter chest and yellow eyes.
           Apprentice: Snowpaw (Alfonso): A large white tom with grey paws and green eyes.
Hollyfeather (Ryan’s Classmate): A golden cat with yellow eyes and a lighter chest and tail tip.
Quietbrook (Ryan’s Classmate): A black tom with a white ear and yellow eyes.
           Apprentice: Leafpaw (Ryan’s Classmate): A small brown cat with yellow and white spots and green eyes.
Lynxstep (Nooshy): A small silver cat with darker spots and amber eyes.
Squirrelfire (Ryan’s Classmate): A black and white she-cat with amber eyes and a fluffy tail.
Queens:
Lilyflight (Ryan’s Mom): A lithe dark ginger tabby she-cat with a white chest and muzzle and green eyes.
Kits (Lilyflight’s): 
          Flipkit (Ryan’s Half Sister): A golden brown tabby she-cat with white flashes and yellow eyes.
          Dewkit (Ryan’s Half Sister): A brown she-cat with golden brown and white spots and amber eyes.
Other Kits:
           Spiderkit (Nooshy’s Brother): A grey tom with silver splashes and yellow eyes.
          Juniperkit (Nooshy’s Sister): A silver she-cat with white splashes and amber eyes.
Elders:
Whistleclaw (Crystal Board Member): A dark grey tabby tom with a black patch on his chest and amber eyes.
Strikescar (Crystal Board Member): A scarred grey tom with blue eyes.
Birdnose (Crystal Board Member): A small white she-cat with orange ears and paws with amber eyes.
Frondstrike (Crystal Board Member): A brown tabby she-cat with green eyes.
Tawnyheart (Ryan’s Grandmother): A black she-cat with a white chest and amber eyes with a greying muzzle.
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Kittypets/Farm Cats:
Nannie (Nancy): A small white she-cat with yellow eyes.
Bella (Becky): A light brown she-cat with a white chest and underbelly and blue eyes.
Harry (Harry): A broad shouldered light reddish-brown tom with amber eyes.
Dare (Darius): A tall black cat with green eyes and white paws.
Violet (Porsha’s Mom): A blue grey she-cat with a fluffy tail and yellow eyes.
Gadget (Garry): A lanky brown tom with amber eyes.
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mrbrightside108 · 6 months
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the henry bowers brainrot is back, i fear
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angelboybreakdowns · 2 years
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yes i could work on one of my multiple wips or i could go to sleep but consider that i could also listen to waterparks on repeat while doing absolutely nothing of value
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the-astral-clump · 2 years
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on todays episode of is this a comfort character or did i just accidentally spawn another motherfucker in our brain? -💫
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I should go sleep but like... hyperfixation
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r0b0b0t-asdf · 2 years
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SCARLETT AND THE SHAKERS EMO REAL!?!?!!!!
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OMG!!
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heartbrake-hotel · 2 years
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the universe has a funny sense of humor.
couldn't sleep, so i was poking around the elvis tag, and found someone doing a 365 day music-related ask challenge. which seemed fun ! so i looked up the list to look over myself.
i've got a specific folder on my laptop for notepad .txt files, because that's where i put all my overly-wordy thoughts that are too unorganized to warrant a google doc. actually a bunch of them are ask games that i've collected over the years that i thought would be fun to answer but i wanted to keep private - i never used to post on tumblr, i was strictly a lurker for about a decade lol so i'd just. yknow, write them down to think about them myself :)
so i copied the 365 days ask to this folder, and am trying to name it, but there's one already in there called "Music Asks.txt" from when i was in college, and.
are you fucking kidding me
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defectivegembrain · 2 years
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When you watch things on your own do you play scenes with your faves over and over until you feel satisfied that you've focused on every detail that's important to you or are you normal
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helloalycia · 4 months
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𝐍𝐎 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃𝐁𝐘𝐄𝐒 [𝐎𝐍𝐄] — 𝐊𝐀𝐓𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐒 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐄𝐍
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summary: when Katniss gets sick and doesn't show any signs of getting better, you fear the worst and have to do whatever you can to make sure she does.
warning/s: mentions of dying + usual warnings that come with writing for the hunger games.
author's note: thanks to everyone who voted on my first lil poll yesterday haha, here’s the katniss one that won! there’s 2 parts and it was written after i just reread all the hunger games books and became hyperfixated on katniss again lmao
i’ll post the jackie taylor yellowjackets one after this for anyone who voted that too :)
two / masterlist / wattpad
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I tightened the woolly scarf around my neck, hoping it would do something to keep the cold, bitter air out despite its flimsiness. Winter in District 12 could be unforgiving, but by the look of things from the front window, it hadn't snowed anymore last night.
"I'm leaving, mum!" I called from the front door, grabbing my school bag.
"Have a nice day, hon!" she called back from the kitchen.
When I left my house, the first thing I stepped foot in was grey slush, and I wasn't sure if that was worse than a blizzard at this point. Nonetheless, I sucked it up and headed over to my best friend Katniss' house, not far from my own in the poor, ragged part of the district, the Seam.
We always met at her place before school since it was on the way and we could walk in together, but when I arrived, her little sister, Primrose, answered and looked worried.
"Hey, darling, what's up?" I asked, accepting the hug she gave me as I stepped inside.
"It's Katniss," she muttered. "She won't get out of bed."
Trying not to show my concern, I said, "I'll go check on her. You finish getting ready so we're not late, yeah?"
She nodded and I watched her go into the kitchen to finish her breakfast with her mum, the older woman offering a small smile when she saw me. I returned it before letting myself into the other room of their house, the bedroom that all three of them shared. Inside, Katniss was still in her bed, under the covers and blocking out the light. Whether she was awake, I wasn't sure, but this was certainly unlike her.
"Katniss?" I called, shaking her body slightly. "We're gonna be late, you've gotta get up."
She groaned slightly, not appreciating my interruption, and then seemed to realise what was happening as she rolled over, eyes squinted with confusion.
"Huh? What are you doing?" she mumbled, rubbing her face, and her voice was raspier than usual.
"It's time for school," I said knowingly, before frowning when I saw her cover her eyes with her hand. "Why are you still in bed? Prim has been trying to wake you."
"What...? I don't..." She stopped, before attempting to sit upright, but she squeezed her eyes shut and steadied herself on the bed.
"Hey," I said, much more concerned now, taking a seat on the edge of her bed. "You're not okay. Is it your head?"
She clutched her forehead, breathing out slowly. "I don't know. It hurts, it– god, it's bright in here."
I frowned, taking in her pained expression and connecting all the dots. "You're sick. You should stay home today. Get better."
As if I'd accused her of murder, Katniss shook her head and pulled the duvet off her with determination. "I'm not. I'm fine, I–" But just on cue, a throaty cough rattled her.
"I can stay home if you want," I offered, already pulling the duvet back on her. "Help you."
The last thing I wanted was to leave her alone whilst she was ill. Technically her mother would be here, but she wasn't the most attentive since she'd lost her husband, so it was essentially like leaving Katniss alone.
"No, you don't need to," Katniss gave in with a sigh.
"I don't mind," I offered, resting a hand on hers. "I can–"
"It's one day," she assured me, before clearing her throat. "I'll be okay. Go. Please. Or you'll be late."
I sighed disapprovingly before nodding, knowing one day of rest would hopefully prove to be useful. I leaned forward to hug her, about to wish her well, but she shoved me back quickly.
"Don't or you'll get sick," she argued tiredly, making me rub my chest where she shoved me.
"Ow," I said with annoyance, before rolling my eyes and standing up. "Very well. Lay down at least."
Thankfully, she obeyed which was how I knew she must've really felt rundown. Pulling the duvet to her shoulders, I tucked her in before wishing her well and leaving the room. After letting her mum know what was wrong and to keep an eye on her, Prim and I left the house together.
"She's okay, right?" the twelve-year-old asked me as we trudged through the muddy snow.
"Oh yeah, of course," I reassured her with a smile. "It's nothing. Just that time of year."
This seemed to work, as Prim sighed with relief before smiling too. But deep down, a small part of me was a little worried. Firstly, Katniss never got sick, ever. And secondly, whereas a cold might not take some people out, it could be the difference between life and death in a place where it was freezing and had no electricity. I only hoped she'd be able to sleep it off and recover soon.
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All day I was thinking of Katniss, unable to focus much at school. When the final bell rang and we were finally let out, I was relieved, only wanting to check on her and hopefully see some improvement. Our friend, Gale, accompanied Prim and I back home, since he lived in the Seam also, and we all went to the Everdeens to see if Katniss was okay.
When we reached their house, we saw Mrs Everdeen helping someone out as part of her job as a healer, so decided not to interrupt and instead headed straight for Katniss. When we walked in, Prim ran to her bedside whilst Gale and I took in the scene. Katniss was still under her covers, as if she'd not moved all day.
"Hey, Catnip," Gale said, hoping to lighten the mood and stir her awake, if she was even asleep.
An annoyed moan was the only response we got, so I settled by her bedside and pulled the duvet down carefully, revealing her face. Her eyes were closed, scrunched with discomfort, but she was sweating. I felt her forehead, surprised at how hot she was, and my worry was increasing.
"How is she?" Prim asked from behind me.
I cleared my throat, pulling my hand back. "Er, warm. But it could be nothing."
Clearly I wasn't the best liar, since she pushed me out the way and felt her sister's forehead before frowning immediately.
"That's not nothing," she exclaimed, before going for the door. "I'm getting mum."
I sighed, but knew it was for the best. When her and her mum returned, the four of us attempted to coax Katniss awake properly. She was reluctant, but finally opened her eyes when I closed the curtains, blocking out the light that was bothering her.
"You're burning, Katniss," I told her gently, taking her hand. Her mum rested a cold cloth on her forehead, moving her hair from her face, and I looked back to her tired eyes. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm just tired," she said dismissively, yawning. "A little cold."
I exchanged nervous glances with Gale, who was as concerned for her as I was.
"You need to listen to your mum and sister," I told her. "They're gonna help you feel better, okay?"
"I'm fine, I just need to rest," she tried to assure me, but she wasn't very convincing.
"Katniss, please," I said quietly, and she looked to me with dark eyes, softening. "Just listen to them."
She nodded, giving in, and I offered her a small smile before looking to her mum for the next step.
"You should both go home," she said to Gale and I. "You can visit tomorrow."
I nodded, not keen to leave Katniss' side but knowing the best care she could be in was her family's. Gale and I said our goodbyes before walking home.
It was supposed to get better after that, Katniss was supposed to get better. But none of it did. She was still bedridden when I visited her after school the next day, though a little more awake than yesterday and itching to get up and leave.
"My legs work fine," she told me with frustration. "Why can't I just get up and push on?"
"Because you're weak, idiot," I told her, giving her a disapproving look. "You've still got a fever, too."
She frowned petulantly, staring off at the wall instead of me. I sighed, resting a hand on hers, and thankfully she didn't pull away.
"Your mum is taking good care of you," I reminded her. "You're gonna be okay, but you need to rest."
"You shouldn't visit me meanwhile," she said after a moment, finally looking at me. "What if I'm contagious?"
I tried not to smile, the thought of not visiting her sounding insane. "I'll live, Katniss."
She exhaled weakly, not bothering to argue. I swallowed hard, taking in her expression. Circles were becoming deeper under her eyes, showing her struggle to sleep properly, and she was still glistening in a thin layer of sweat. Even now, her hand was hot beneath mine, and it terrified me. But I tried not to think of the worst, instead manifesting positive thoughts the best I could.
Enough positivity to make Katniss puke, that was the goal.
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Unfortunately, it only got worse from there on out. It was getting colder the deeper we got into winter, which wasn't helping, and Katniss was missing more and more days off school. And then we finally finished school for the year, and Katniss was still unwell.
Unlike that second visit, she wasn't fighting her weakness anymore, unable to play it tough when her migraines were ruining her. Her fever would break, then return, then break again. I didn't understand what was wrong and I'd never been so scared in my life. Gale and her family felt the same, but her mum was surprisingly consistent with her care, doing everything she could to make her daughter better.
But we all knew what nobody would admit – Katniss needed real medicine, none of this herbal stuff.
One day, I was visiting Katniss, going over more and more now that school was done, but she wasn't always awake when I visited. Thankfully she was today, and when I walked in, her head turned to the door to see who it was. When she saw it was me, she shook her head, unimpressed.
"You shouldn't be here," she said as she always did, and I rolled my eyes playfully.
Ignoring her, I took a seat at the edge of her bed, aware of her eyes following my every move.
"Prim," she began, but I answered before she needed to finish.
"She's at Gale's," I reassured her, making her sigh with relief.
Having Prim seeing her like this always worried her, but I was making sure that the younger Everdeen wasn't always around. Of course, she was stubborn like her sister and sometimes insisted. Today though, she was content spending the day with Gale's siblings.
I looked down at Katniss, noticing how much weight she'd lost these past few weeks. She was already skinny, a consequence of living in District 12, but this was sickly, haunting. I'd never seen her so rundown before and I was seriously terrified that if we didn't get her real medicine soon, she could die. Nobody had a cold or flu or whatever it was for this damn long. She was struggling to eat properly, to stand at all, and she looked like hell. I couldn't just watch her deteriorate like this. Not my best friend. Not the girl I cared way too much for.
"Stop it," she said, an accidental whisper. "Stop looking at me like that."
"I'm not doing anything," I defended, embarrassed I'd been caught.
She knew me too well though. "I'll be okay. In fact–" She paused, and then suddenly attempted to sit upright, but her arms were too weak to hold her up and she slipped right back down. The tears were quick to pool in her eyes, a matching scowl on her face, at her incompetence.
"It's okay," I said sympathetically, taking her hand in between mine.
She squeezed it tight, like a lifeline, but avoided my eyes. A tear slipped from hers, and I pretended not to see it for her sake.
"I need to hunt," she said with a hoarse voice, no doubt holding in her emotion.
"Gale has it under control," I said, only imagining all she'd been worrying herself with whilst stuck here. She was the sole provider for her family, and with her out of action, the responsibilities were piling up.
"He has his own family to worry about," she snapped, before catching herself, instantly feeling bad. Quieter, she said, "It's not enough."
She wasn't wrong, of course, but I would never let her know that. Gale barely found enough to feed his own family, especially during winter, and he was sparing what little he could to keep Prim and her mum afloat. I did the same with what scraps I got, but I was no hunter and couldn't offer extra game like he could.
"We're sorting it," I said confidently. "Your mum and Prim are okay, aren't they?"
She finally met my eyes, hers glassy and exhausted. "For how long?"
It was much harder to lie to her when she was looking right at me, so I cleared my throat and forced a small smile. "All the more reason to get better, right?"
She pursed her lips, looking away again. It was quiet as she laid there, me holding her hand and keeping her company. I knew how horrible it could be when you were sick and alone, so I made sure not leave her side, as her eyes began to flicker close, struggling to fight the tiredness. I moved closer, pushing the hair from her eyes and raking my hands through her roots, knowing she liked the feeling but would never admit it. I was proven right when she let out a deep breath, squeezing my hand in approval, and I smiled softly at how cute she could be when she didn't even know it.
Only when she was out of it did I feel my tears blur my vision, unable to pretend that I was okay. She wasn't looking any better, and I couldn't just watch her like this, unable to do a thing.
I leaned forward, kissing her forehead, and closed my eyes briefly, praying to whatever God was out there that she'd be okay.
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Everyone had their special something, a skill they had perfected or a hobby they could get lost in. Mine? I hadn't discovered it yet. I suppose I was doing pretty well in school, so taking tests could count, though it was a shit skill to have, impractical. But hunting, that was Katniss' and Gale's thing. No, definitely not mine.
They'd taken me out once, letting me join them on their weekly escapade. Gale found it hilarious that I moved too loudly, scaring away the prey, or that I stepped in my own trap, getting my foot stuck in the rope. I let him enjoy himself at my expense, knowing it was inevitable. Katniss however, despite the small smile that would ghost her lips at something stupid I'd do, was adamant on helping me. She took it too seriously, showing me how to use her prized bow and how to sneak around better. I'd like to say it worked, that I learnt something, but it didn't. It was safe to say they never took me again.
So, when I found myself in the forbidden woods outside the District 12 fence, with Katniss' bow in hand, I felt like a foreigner. I wasn't familiar with these woods, especially not in winter when it was a completely different ballgame to what I'd 'practiced' in last summer. Katniss' bow was too big for me, and no matter how hard I tried to take her familiar hunting routes, my approach always scared away the prey.
I was out there for two hours, certain my fingers would fall off from the cold, but I refused to give up. I couldn't return empty handed. Gale hadn't been successful last week, and family responsibilities had kept him from hunting today like he usually did. So, I took it upon myself to do it, especially because Prim was so hungry, her little face shrinking the longer Katniss was bedridden. I couldn't let her down, any of them, so I pushed on.
But every arrow I let fly missed its target, and every squirrel I approached scampered off. The sun, hidden behind thick clouds, was setting and it was getting dark out, even though the afternoon was barely over. I had to go home, but I had nothing to show for it. I couldn't even pick any edible plants because everything was frozen. I was a failure.
I couldn't catch a thing; the one job I had, to keep Prim fed, was failing; Katniss was dying and I couldn't do a thing to change any of it.
Tears streamed down my face, hot against the cold of my cheeks, and I collapsed in the snow, unbothered by it melting into the cotton of my trousers. It didn't matter anymore.
She wasn't getting better. Every day I visited her, she looked worse for wear. If it wasn't her fevers, it was her migraines. And if it wasn't her migraines, it was her throat. I was losing her day by day and I felt powerless. I couldn't even shoot a fucking squirrel to help. Nothing was working.
I was going to lose her.
Admittedly, I wallowed in self-pity for a little longer, appreciating having somewhere private to let it all out. It was hard playing it positive and tough all the time, for Prim's and Katniss' sake, when the truth was I was scared shitless. Living in a world without my best friend, the girl I so deeply loved to the point that she'd laugh if she ever found out, was terrifying. I didn't even want to envision it.
It was dark by the time I returned to the Everdeens home. I would have much preferred to go straight home, but I couldn't not update them on my false promise.
"Y/N!" Prim exclaimed when she opened the door, before tugging me in instantly.
"Hey," I said, forcing a smile, and I was glad the redness from the cold disguised my red eyes from crying.
"You're freezing," she realised, before calling for her mum. "You were gone for ages! Come, sit in front of the fire."
I pulled back as she attempted to drag me to the fire, and then her mum appeared and noticed the same thing Prim did.
"Y/N, you need to warm up–"
"I will, at my house," I promised her. "I just came to tell you that I– that–" I paused, afraid of the shakiness of my voice. Swallowing thickly, I said, "I'm sorry. I couldn't– I'm not–"
Fuck, why was this so hard?
"I'm gonna figure it out," I changed my words, nodding confidently. "I'll get some food. I'm sorry. I–"
Prim suddenly hugged me, arms wrapping around my torso and squeezing so tightly that I could have snapped in half from how frozen I was. But I appreciated it nonetheless and returned the gesture, letting out a shaky breath.
"Don't do it again," her mum said gently, resting a hand on my cheek before hugging me too.
I blinked back my tears as I let myself relax in their comfort.
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I couldn't just stand by and do nothing anymore, and there was only one thing that I knew I could do. None of us could ever afford the medicine Katniss needed from the doctor in town, unless we traded something valuable, like food.
If I used my tesserae, adding my name another time into the potential tributes for District 12, I would receive a year's supply of oil and grain. Participants could only apply once for themselves, and once for any of their family members if they were between the ages of 12 and 18. I'd used mine for this year, but I could still use it on behalf of my parents. They never wanted me to, but this was an emergency and they didn't need to know.
So, on behalf of them, I used my tesserae and traded that two years' supply of oil and grain with the doctor in exchange for the medicine that would make Katniss better. After describing all her symptoms, he explained how it was some complex form of a cold, rare but deadly. I was lucky I'd got to him in time.
Gale didn't approve of my plan when I told him, trying to talk me out of it. Just like Katniss, he cared about whether I used my tesserae without needing to. I could see it was killing him to watch me do it anyway, wanting to do it himself if he could, but he'd already used all his family's tesserae for the year. It was the first thing he did every time it was available, having no choice since he had a big family.
After I collected the medicine from the doctor, I was quick to return to Katniss' house, giving a rushed explanation to her mum about the medicine and what the doctor said about administering it and how it would save her life.
"Y/N, how did you get this?" she asked once I finished to catch my breath.
"It doesn't matter," I said to her. "But it'll help. We can give her the first dose now."
"Y/N–”
"Mrs Everdeen, please," I pleaded, and she must have seen the desperation in my expression because she nodded slowly and went to make Katniss some tea with the medicine in it. It was a syrup of some sort, so the mint tea should have made it a bit more palatable.
Eventually we both went to Katniss' room, where Prim was sat beside her, holding her hand and chatting quietly. When she spotted us both, she perked up and smiled a little.
"Hey, Prim," I said, returning her smile and joining her side. "How's the patient?"
"She's got a headache," Prim answered, and I looked to Katniss who had a wet towel pressed to her eyes, both cooling her down and also blocking out the light.
"Y/N?" Katniss whispered, though unmoving.
"Yours truly," I said playfully, needing to disguise the permanent concern that was in my voice. "We brought you some tea, Katniss."
She groaned quietly. "I don't want it."
Her mum glanced at me, unsure how to proceed, so I took the mug from her hand and placed it on the bedside table.
"It'll help," I promised her, before gently pulling her duvet down. "Can you sit up for me, please?"
She sighed but thankfully obeyed, allowing me to help her sit upright. She leaned against the bed frame and let me remove the towel from her eyes. I smiled when I saw her blue eyes, though they were fatigued as they had been since she'd gotten sick. Not for long, hopefully.
"Drink up," I encouraged, offering her the mug.
She silently accepted it, blowing on the tea before taking the first sip. Her face scrunched up with disgust. "What is that?"
"New herbal remedy," her mum answered before I could struggle to.
Katniss wasn't impressed, but managed to drink the whole thing, probably because she knew I'd let her go to sleep if she did. After laying back down, I pulled the duvet back over her and pushed her hair behind her ear, smiling reassuringly.
"You should feel better with that," I told her with certainty.
She didn't reply, eyes avoiding mine, something I'd noticed she'd been doing for a while now. It was like she knew she wasn't getting better and was scared to admit the truth, but this was different. This would finally work.
Prim and I stayed by her side until she fell asleep, and that was when I told her about the medicine. The pure joy and relief on her face was enough to let me know I'd made the right decision, and she hugged me so tightly that I almost lost my breath.
"I told you she'd be okay," I said with a small smile, accepting her hug. "And so will you."
"Thank you," she muttered into my shoulder.
I squeezed her gently before we stayed there, sat side by side. She didn't want to leave Katniss' side, and neither did I, but it was getting late and, at some point, Prim had dozed off on my shoulder. Only after I had tucked her into her mum's bed did Mrs Everdeen politely kick me out, forcing me to get some rest of my own at home. For once, I didn't argue it, my exhaustion catching up to me. Plus, I could sleep well knowing Katniss would already be doing a lot better tonight.
As soon as I woke up and remembered the medicine the next morning, I headed straight to the Everdeens place, hoping to see some sort of improvement with Katniss. So you can imagine my surprise when I walked into her room and saw her sat upright in bed, eating an actual breakfast on a tray.
"Katniss!" I said with disbelief, before rushing to hug her. "You're eating!"
She returned my hug and I pulled up a chair beside her bed, studying her curiously. She'd looked like she'd had a better sleep than she usually did, and she was actually holding up her own weight which was an achievement in itself. The medication was working!
The sight of her looking a lot healthier and actually improving from her poor condition brought tears to my eyes, but I willed them away. She'd hate to see me crying over her, but I genuinely couldn't believe it.
"I'm not stupid," she said with a raspy voice, eyes narrowed my way.
I furrowed my brows. "What?"
She frowned. "You think I don't know that you gave me actual medicine last night? There's no other explanation for why I'm feeling better. And I know it's not because of a damn herbal remedy. I was doomed, Y/N. So, what the hell did you do?"
"So you do feel better?"
"Y/N!"
I sighed as she raised her voice. "Okay, look, I'm sorry for lying to you, but you wouldn't have taken it if I'd told you."
"Damn right I wouldn't have!" she snapped, glaring at me. "We can't afford that! Which brings me to my next question. How the hell did you get it?"
I shook my head, looking down at her breakfast tray. "It's not your concern."
"Y/N, I swear to God I'll–"
"What?" I cut her off, meeting her hard stare with my own. "You'll what?"
Her eyes flickered between mine before softening. "Y/N. Please."
I could have given in so easily, just from a simple glance, but I refused to let her bait me. I ignored her instead, shaking my head and returning my gaze to her breakfast tray.
"You traded something," she guessed, back to her irritated self. When I didn't answer, she said, "What? What did you trade?"
Again, I said nothing, neither confirming nor denying, but she wasn't having it.
"Goddamn it, Y/N!" she shouted, but her voice was still weak so it was more of a broken yell. "You can't just sit there in silence whilst I–"
"Stop it!" I raised my voice too, glaring at her.
"What the hell were you thinking?!"
I frowned, eyes pooling with tears. "I was thinking that I couldn't just sit here and watch and not do anything! I was thinking that I was terrified that you would die! That you were getting worse and worse every day, and that I would lose you, Katniss!"
Her eyes were glassy as they met mine. "How many times?"
I scoffed, looking away. "Katniss, not now."
I expected her to yell again, but she said in a quiet voice, "Please. How many times is your name in there?"
I clenched my jaw, crossing my arms over my chest stubbornly. But when I glanced at her, she was watching me like a little girl who'd just lost her puppy, and I couldn't not respond.
"Not a lot," I tried to sugar coat it. "Only twelve times." At this, she released a sharp breath. "I traded two years of food with the doctor. It was enough to get the medicine."
She pushed the tray off her lap before pulling her knees to her chest, hiding her face between them. She was shaking her head and I knew she was crying, the sniffling giving it away. Feeling insanely bad, I sat on the bed beside her and pulled her in for a side hug the best I could.
"It's okay," I told her, rubbing her arm. "I chose to do it, Katniss. And I'd do it again, over and over, if it means you'll be okay."
She shook her head. "You shouldn't have," she said with a muffled voice, her head still tucked between her legs.
"You shouldn't have got sick," I tried to joke, but she only looked up at me with red eyes and quivering lips. I lost my smile, admitting, "I wasn't going to lose you. You don't get it."
I love you, I wanted to add, but I couldn't.
"Neither do you," she mumbled, before shoving me off her childishly.
I didn't get to question her because she pulled the tray back onto her lap and tried to finish off the remainder of stale bread in her plate. I returned to my seat next to her bed, watching as she sulked, ate and gave me the temporary silent treatment. I didn't care too much, as long as she was eating.
Once she finished, I took the tray and put it to the side momentarily, flashing her a supportive smile.
"You finished every last bit," I pointed out. "I'm proud of you."
She rolled her eyes, but that only made me smile more because it meant she had the effort to be annoyed at me, which was something she hadn't had for a while now.
"Did you have your morning dose of medicine?" I asked reluctantly, but needing to know.
She nodded, crossing her arms. "My mum gave it me earlier."
I relaxed. "Good."
Before I could say anything else, the door to the bedroom opened and Prim ran in, a bright smile on her face. Despite Katniss' annoyance with me, she couldn't resist returning her sister's smile, accepting her onto the bed and hugging her.
"You already look so much better," Prim was saying with amazement. "I was so scared."
"Well, there's no need to be," Katniss reassured her. "You didn't struggle too much without me, right?"
Prim shook her head. "Gale and Y/N have been helping. Y/N wouldn't leave. Mum had to kick her out a lot."
I facepalmed, feeling my cheeks heat up with embarrassment. It only deepened when Katniss glanced my way with an unreadable expression.
"Yeah, she has a tendency to not listen," she said, making me roll my eyes.
"She saved you," Prim said to her.
Katniss licked her lips. "I know."
I felt awkward, definitely not wanting the credit, I just wanted her to be okay. But then Prim changed the subject, catching Katniss up on all she'd missed, so I was able to sit back and witness it all, chiming in whenever Prim needed.
For once, Katniss was able to listen and actually hold a conversation. It was heartwarming to see, and if this was what she was like after one dose, I couldn't wait until she'd had the full thing.
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nomadstucky · 2 months
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Title: I'm so in love with you. Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Fem!Reader WC: ~3.7K Content Warnings: SMUT (Unprotected, Simon is a biiiit of a bottom, Simon likes being bit) MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, feels, Reader gets injured, angst but it does have a good/happy ending. I know I just posted a Simon Riley fic, but the brain rot DO be brain rotting. My current hyperfixation. I have lots of other stories half-written or fleshed out for all the characters I write for, and I am getting to them, I promise!!
Wonderfully beta'd by the ever amazing @universitypenguin - if you have not read anything Alice has posted, please do so! The Princess and The Lawyer is AMAZING!!
Requests are open, feel free to submit, and to those who already have, I promise I am working on them!!
It was moments like these that you genuinely dreaded, sometimes wishing that you had chosen something different. Everyone, even now, always questioned why this was the career chosen. You had never been able to fully answer, always giving a vague, ‘I’m in it for the same reasons everyone else is.’ Never truly knew why, what pulled you here. 
The satisfaction when you had won was unlike any other, but so were the nightmares. The constant replay of the field, the battles, the close calls that could have ended up much worse. It was never about you, no, rather your teammates. The close calls they faced, that were your fault. If you had been a few seconds quicker, or had just slowed down and aimed properly, you could’ve avoided these moments.
That’s where you currently found yourself, in a meeting with Captain Price, and Lieutenant Riley. Both very terrifying men. At least, Price was trying to make it easier on you, giving soft smiles, and ‘Ghost, relax. Everyone makes mistakes.’ 
A bite of ‘doesn’t matter, they should be able to conduct themselves properly.’ Was fired back. It was no secret the Lieutenant had a distaste for you. Maybe because you were ‘reckless’ as he had described you multiple times. Perhaps it was because at the end of the day he ended up having to save you more than once. Soap had attempted to calm your nerves one day, explaining ‘he gets like this with everyone. ‘S not just you.’ 
You saw the way he acted upon passing. With other soldiers, it was a very slight almost imperceptible nod of his head, but for you the ever-present scowl on his face seemed to deepen. No matter what you had tried, you could never get that recognition that you so desperately wanted. 
“Captain,” you said, gaining his attention, “W-While I appreciate the help, he’s not wrong. I-I don’t agree with the way he’s making his points, but I should’ve been paying more attention. Gaz could’ve been seriously hurt i—“ 
“He could’ve been killed! Because of you!” Ghost’s voice boomed across the Captain’s office. You jumped in your seat.
“You’re absolutely right,” you said looking at Ghost, “and I am sorry.” 
He grunted in response, before stalking out of the room.
“Ignore him, he’s stressed out over the next mission.”
You shook your head, “He’s right. Gaz could’ve died because of my mistake.” The guilt sat stationary in your chest. 
Price offered a sympathetic smile, “Ghost’s has also had some close calls. That is very similar to the potential today. We all have had some pretty close calls. Don’t let him get in your head.” 
You nodded, and rose from the chair on a shaky breath, “thank you.” 
Price nodded, “You’re welcome. There’s a debriefing in an hour.” He reminded. 
You nodded and walked out to get ready for the meeting. 
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Three hours later you had found yourself in the middle of the battlefield. According to Price, it should’ve been an ‘easy’ mission. Gather the intel and get out, you hadn’t planned for the ambush. You had been almost positive you were safe, hidden behind a barrel, Ghost beside you. That was until you caught sight of the enemy behind you. 
You caught them raising their gun, aiming for the lieutenant. Soap screamed for him, you pushed him clean out of the way before hearing two gunshots ring out. One of which had pierced the enemy, knocking him down instantly. The other lodged itself into your thigh. You didn’t quite register the shot at first. Not until Soap was by your side. 
“Just go. Scan the perimeter, make sure there’s no more, make sure Gaz has the intel.” You spoke before he even had a chance to say anything to you. Soap ran off, you sat yourself down, still hiding behind the barrel. Your hand weakly pressing against the wound in your thigh. 
You leaned your head back against the barrel, closing your eyes as your hand was replaced by Ghost’s gloved appendage. You whined as he put more pressure than you had been. “I know, I know. Stay with me.” 
You giggled softly, “ironic, isn’t it?” Your head rolled to the side. “This time it wasn’t you saving me.” 
You watched Ghost’s eyes pass between your face and your leg repeatedly. His voice became distorted as he spoke into the walkie on his shoulder, more than likely explaining the situation to Price, and Gaz. Your eyelids grew heavy, so you opted to keep them closed. 
You could hear the concern in Ghost’s voice, but you could no longer hear the words. Could still feel the gloved hand pushing at your skin, but no longer the pain. You slowly allowed yourself to fall into the unconsciousness pulling at you. 
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You came to, to the sounds of beeping and hushed voices. Confused, you opened your eyes, “Jesus.” You squinted, looking around. You found Price, and Ghost by your bedside. 
“Hey. How do you feel?” Price spoke, keeping his voice soft. 
“What happened?” Your voice came out weak. Ghost handed you a small paper cup with a straw. Noting he didn’t have the gloves on anymore. 
“Drink this. Small Sips. ” He spoke. You took it, taking a small sip as he instructed.
“You were shot.” Price spoke up again, and everything came back to you, “You were lucky. The bullet missed the femoral artery. Small fracture, you’re off for the next 8 to 12 weeks.” 
“8 to 12 weeks?” Your eyes widened, “No, Price there has to be a mistake! Surely it won’t take that long!” You handed the cup back to Ghost.
“That’s what the doctor has said, and that’s what we’re going by.” Price told you before his phone went off, and he walked out to take the call. 
You groaned, throwing your head back into the pillows. Ghost chuckled before handing you the cup again, “I bet you’re really regretting taking that bullet for me now huh?” 
You looked over at him, “not at all,” you smiled, “but I have to ask, where’d the gloves go?” 
You heard, more than saw, the audible gulp he took. “Had to take them off.” 
You nodded like you understood the implication of what he was saying. Which you did. You remembered him pressing his hands down against the wound trying to get the blood to clot. Saw how your blood stained the white part of the skeleton fabric. 
When you looked back up at him, you could see the fear. For once you saw your strong-willed, cold-hearted lieutenant, genuinely scared. For you. Like he was reliving what happened. Like he couldn’t believe you were still here. 
The word lucky rattled around in your brain. Echoing Price’s infliction. You were incredibly lucky, though you weren’t sure you’d admit it out loud. Something had shifted. You weren’t able to pinpoint exactly what, but something in the air of your hospital room felt different.
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The aftermath of a mission always did funky things to you. Things you could never fully understand. Adding to that, the fact that you had been out of commission for the last 10 weeks. You had been a little rusty. Which was how you found yourself being dragged out to Ghost’s office. You were sure that he was mad, that he was going to berate you when he called you to his office. However, he led you past his office, and into his personal quarters. “You’re always such a problem.” He said as he closed the door behind you. 
“I didn’t see it!” You watched him. 
“I’m not saying anything.” He defended. 
“You are! You’re saying that I’m a problem.” 
“Because you are. I consistently am having to step in and save your ass because you’re so reckless.” 
“You can’t seriously sit there and get caught up in the few times you’ve saved me! Are you serious?! This is a fucking joke. You’re a fucking joke.” Your voice raised, anger shooting through your body. 
Ghost glared at you. “I’M the joke?! You must really think highly of yourself!” 
“Highl— What?! This is. No. No! I’m leaving. I will not allow you to sit here and treat me like this.” You stomped towards the door. You didn’t make it very far, before Ghost’s hand wrapped around your upper arm. 
“Do you care so little for your own life?” He spun you around to face him.
”What?” 
“Honestly, you’re reckless on the field, you almost stepped on a damn landmine today!! You took a bullet for me!” 
“I told you, I didn’t see it! I’m not reckless, and who knows what would have happened if I had let the bullet hit you! You could’ve died! I wasn’t willing to watch anything happen to you, when I could’ve helped!” 
“Why?!” 
“Because I care about you! Because the thought of you not being here hurts me more than I want to admit! Because the thought of not hearing your fucking voice every day, scares me!” You shouted, feeling the tears come to the surface of your eyes, but you refused to cry in front of him. 
The shock of your words had Ghost releasing his grip on you, if only slightly. You shook your head. “Forget it.” you sniffled and opened the door walking further down the hallway. Ghost snapped to his senses, and called you, but you were out of his sight. 
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You had asked Price for some extra time. “A few more weeks, I want to make sure that I’m ready to be on the field again.” Was what you had told him, when in reality, you wanted to prolong your solitude. You hadn’t spoken to Ghost since your outburst, but he seemed content in letting it happen. Leaving you alone. 
Sure, you had run into each other a few times, damn near impossible not to, but never spoken to each other. In the time that you hadn’t been on missions, you spent it in your room reading, or in the gym trying to strengthen yourself. 
The boys had come back from another successful mission, elated but bruised. You smiled and hugged each of them with the exception of Ghost. You merely nodded at him, he stood stoic as ever. 
Soap threw his arm around you before leading you inside, with everyone following, “You’ll have to come with us on the next one. It’ll be just like old times!” He sang. 
You giggled, “yeah, maybe. We’ll see how I’m feeling.” 
“Well, at least come out to drink with us tonight! We’re heading to Bar Code.” Soap shook your shoulders lightly. He was always in a good mood after a successful mission. 
You nodded, “Sure.” 
That was how you found yourself in civilian clothing, sitting across from Price. Just shooting the shit with the boys reminded you of old times, better times. Price called your name, “you’ve been training. A lot harder than we’ve seen you before.” 
You smiled, knowing it was a compliment of the highest form, “Thank you, sir. I just want to make sure that I’m ready to be back in the field.” 
“So, I can count on you for the next one then?” 
Your smile widened, as you nodded, and Soap and Gaz whooped and cheered. “Well!” Gaz was the one to throw his arm around you this time, “I say that’s cause for celebrations! I’ll go get more drinks.” 
He moved to stand, but you put your hand on top of his on your shoulder, “let me.” You giggled as he withdrew and stood, walking over to the bar. 
Ordering what you knew everyone liked, you leant against the bar as you waited for the drinks. A slimy looking man slid next to you, “what’s a pretty little thing like you doing here all by yourself?” He clicked his tongue on the roof of his mouth. 
“Oh,” you said quietly, moving away slightly, “I’m not alone. Here with some friends.” Of course Ghost had caught sight of him before he got close to you. 
The man followed you, before a hand reached out to grip your waist, pulling you closer. You leaned away. “C’mon. Don’t be like that. I bet they won’t even notice if you’re gone.” You could smell the alcohol on him before he even opened his mouth. 
You kept pushing at his chest, getting more alarmed by the moment, “I-I’m flattered, but not interested,” you looked around for someone, anyone to help you, but found no one. “I really should get back to my friends.” 
In an instant, Ghost was by your side. Unwrapping the stranger's hand from you before pulling you behind him. “You okay?” He looked over his shoulder at you. 
You nodded, and walked to the table silently. From what you saw the unknown man backed down pretty quickly, given Ghost was still in his tac gear, minus the vest. 
Ghost had come back with the drinks and set them down. Not another word was said between you and him for the rest of the night. 
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Getting back to the base, everyone went their separate ways. Everyone except Ghost who pulled you with him into an empty barracks room. It was a standard room, with a bed in the back corner, small desk and lamp on the right side, and an armoire on the left.   “Ghost.. What do–” 
“Simon.” He cut you off. 
You tilted your head, confused. “Call me Simon. Please.” 
“Okay… Simon. Is there something you need?” 
His eyes fluttered shut as you said his name. “I think a conversation is needed.” 
“Conversation about what?” You crossed your arms over your chest. 
“What did you mean?” His eyes opened, solely focusing on your face, your reaction to him. “You said you care about me. But there’s so many things that could mean.” 
You took a deep breath in, and dropped your arms. “I’m exhausted. We can talk about this later.” You turned for the door. 
Simon muttered your name, “You and I both know if you walk out of here, this conversation won’t ever happen.” His voice stopped you from moving any further. “Please.” His voice softened to a whisper. 
“You’re a big boy, Simon. I’m sure you can figure it out. Given the context.” 
“I want to hear you say it.” 
“Why? So you can embarrass me some more? To make me relive that specific part of the conversation for days? I already have. I shouldn’t have said anything, it was vastly inappropriate.” 
Simon shook his head, stepping closer to you. “Tell me. Please.” 
A shiver flew down your spine. “You make it sound so easy. It won’t fix anything.” 
Simon stayed quiet behind you. He was close enough at this point to feel the body heat he gave off. You sighed, defeated. “I care about you.” You whisper. 
“And what does that mean?” Simon whispered back. 
You closed your eyes, staying quiet. This time when he said your name, he coated it in adoration, in awe. Pressing his body even closer, you caved. 
“I’m into you.” You felt his forehead come to rest on your shoulder. 
“Again.” He commanded, softly as his arm wrapped around your waist. 
You smiled, biting your lip, “I like you.” 
Simon pulled you back so you were fully flush against him. “Again.” 
“I have feelings for you.” 
His grip tightened, hand moving to your hip as he spun you to face him. “Once more.” He watched you. 
You wrapped your arms around his neck, “I am so in love with you it hurts sometimes.” 
“Yeah?” He breathed, and you nodded as his face drew closer. 
“Yeah” you whispered moments before he pushed his mask up just past his nose, and kissed you. 
Fuck, he was good. He knew how to hook you in, one hand resting on the hinge of your jaw, and the other on your waist. Pulling you in, while simultaneously keeping you where he wanted you.
You couldn’t resist kissing back, placing your hands firmly on his chest. You could feel the low rumble he let out. Pulling away for a second, Simon dragged his thumb down the center of your lips. Your breathing was rapid, your mind felt like it was in the clouds. 
Without thinking, you leaned back in to capture his lips this time. His hands drifted down your body, before tapping the backs of your thighs. You shook your head only slightly to still keep your lips attached to his. 
He grunted into your mouth, before crouching slightly, and lifting you into his arms. You gasped before breaking apart, “Simon, put me down.” 
You saw his lips pull up into a smirk, “gladly” you watched his mouth form the word. He walked over, tightening his grip only moments before dropping you against the mattress. 
You squealed softly, before this mountain of a man was sprawled out on top of you, reattaching his lips to any skin he could find. Kissing down your face, to your neck. Hands pawing at your body, lifting your shirt to caress your skin. You whined, before sitting up only enough to pull your shirt off. 
“Atta girl.” Simon praised before reattaching his mouth to yours. His hands roaming your body, gently groping along his way as he finds the buttons on your jeans and slides them along with your panties off in one motion. 
You truly don’t know what came over you, the need to have Simon under you, succumbing to whatever you wanted, was overwhelming. 
So that was exactly what you decided to do, as you heaved your body so you had him pinned beneath you. The surprise of it alone had him pulling away from you. Hands coming to rest on your thighs. 
You made a show of removing your bra, the accompanying groan from him as you removed the last article of clothing was satisfying. You carefully slid down his body, removing articles of clothing as you went, until he was completely naked, and completely at your mercy. You looked down at him, your lip between your teeth. 
“Not so big and bad now are you?” You spoke softly, lining Simon’s leaking cock with your entrance, not able to stand another moment of the teasing.
“Don’t be a fucking tease, baby.” Simon gritted out. 
“Me? Never” You spoke, sliding him inside until you were flush with his hips. Gasping, as he gently bucked up into you. 
The grunt Simon let out had you clenching around him. His hands clasped around your hips, expletives being whispered into the air around you two. 
You brought yourself up just enough for him to slide out enough, before dropping yourself back down. “Fuck, yes. Just like that.” Simon whined. 
The sound alone had you falling forward, hands coming up to catch yourself on his chest. You let out a moan, as his hands roamed your body. “C’mon. Need me to take the lead?” He teased. 
You bit your lip as you straightened yourself out, and started bouncing on his cock. Simon’s head rolled back further into the pillow. Small chants of yes left his mouth. You glanced down at him, completely at your mercy, and you let out a borderline pornographic moan. 
Simon’s neck had been on full display, the veins distended, almost inviting. He was clenching his teeth, so as to keep all those little sounds in. Eventually, the intrusive thought won and you leant forward. Lips and teeth sucking a bright red hickey into his neck. “Oh, Fuck.” Simon mewled. 
Laving your tongue over the new mark, you felt a swell of pride. “Can’t take it?” You whispered into his ear, gently biting down on his earlobe. Simon let out a high pitched whine. “Who knew Simon Riley liked being bitten huh?” 
His hands settled back on your hips, “please” he grunted. 
You cooed, straightening and planting your hands on his chest once again, as you worked yourself against his cock. “Awwww. D’you wanna cum?” 
Increasing your speed, you could feel the stutter in his breath under your hands. One of his hands running up your back, to cup the back of your neck, pulling you down. 
Capturing your lips, he kissed any and all smart comments, and thoughts out of your head. Simon pulled away from you enough to let out a long, drawn out moan, as your hips stuttered, and you felt the warmth of his cum flooding you. 
You gasped, not expecting it so quickly. The pure, unadulterated power you felt in this moment was enormous. You just made big, bad, cold-hearted Simon Riley cum before you. 
Simon’s hands fell to your thighs, gently running his fingers over where the bullet had entered, “shit.” breathing labored, unable to think. 
You looked down at him, breathing picking up, eyes wide. “One more.” You surprised even yourself. “Give me one more. Si, just one more.” You spoke, grinding your hips against his. 
He grunted your name, “I can’t.” 
“Yes, yes you can. Gimme one more. You’re such a good boy, Si. You can gimme one more, yeah?” You whined, resuming bouncing on his cock once more. 
Simon whimpered, “Please.” 
“Yeah, there it is. Look at you. Letting me use you like this. Fuck. So good for me, yeah?” 
You watched Simon’s eyes roll back in his head, mouth open just slightly, allowing all the little noises loose. The little moans, hiccups, and half whines. You’d be lying if you said it wasn’t getting to you. 
“You’re so hot like this. Can’t shut you up, can I?” You spoke, hips faltering. 
Soft chants of please left Simon’s pretty pink lips, head rolling from side to side. He was a sight. “Gonna cum again for me, Si?” You taunted him. 
Simon hiccuped, and nodded furiously. His entire body tensed, letting out an absolute wrecked moan, you once again felt the warmth of his seed, which only triggered your own orgasm this time. 
Head thrown back, grinding your hips before slowing to a complete stop. Slowly you lifted yourself on your knees and climbed off him. Simon chuckled as you collapsed beside him. 
“That definitely was not expected.” You wheezed out, attempting to catch your breath. 
“What part?” Simon smirked, pulling his mask back down. 
“All of it.” You yawned, and curled into his side. 
“We can dissect it in the morning, get some rest.” Simon ran his hand along your back gently, and you fell asleep in no time.
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