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wttcsms · 2 years

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taking inspiration from the recent tiktok trend where people describe couple pairings that are ‘bound to fall in love’, i decided to create a list of 10 of my favorite pairing tropes that i think are bound to fall for each other! the kicker was: i assigned each duo a number + y’all picked a character for the pairing. here are the results! <3

links will be updated as i complete the fics; however, please keep in mind while these may be plot heavy, there is a high chance there’s going to be smut!! read all content warnings before proceeding.

your roots in my dreamland — megumi fushiguro x f!reader

the princess & the knight. as the darling princess and only daughter of the king, a love marriage is out of the question for you. a marriage for you is nothing more than a strategic alliance, and hardly anyone can blame you for trying to run away from the castle the moment you heard that your father has struck a deal and accepted an engagement to a man you have never even met on your behalf. this crown prince rules a kingdom so far away, it’ll take a solid two months minimum to make the journey there. to ensure that you do not escape, your father assigns a knight to escort you the whole way there; partly to keep you safe but mainly to keep you in check. not just any knight will do; he assigns sir megumi fushiguro, the one who landed on the doorsteps of the castle as a young orphaned boy with no traceable family history. dreading this marriage to an unknown man, you’ll do anything in your power to slow down this journey, even if it means starting an all out war with this young knight, who must be someone special if your father trusts him to be your escort. but the longer you’re stuck in the same carriage with him, exploring all these different lands together, you realize that it’s not marriage you’re wholeheartedly opposed to. in fact, marriage with the right person doesn’t seem so disagreeable if it’s with a certain someone...

you’d be like heaven to touch — keigo takami x f!reader

the serious, smart girl & the infamous frat boy. you’ve got it all figured out. you have folders in your laptop detailing your one year, five year, ten year, and even fifteen year plan. you email your professors in advance asking for the syllabus because you can’t handle not having everything neatly organized and color-coded in your physical planner, notion, and excel spreadsheet. you’re the president of your honor society, vp of two other student organizations, treasurer for the student government association, and no one even wants to bother to ask you to go into detail about your volunteer work or internships. you’re focused, you’re driven, and you refuse to get distracted. not when you’re so close to graduating (summa cum laude, obviously). but something doesn’t quite go as planned. ever so meticulous you has never once anticipated that frat president keigo takami would point at you in the campus starbucks and say “there’s my girlfriend right there!” just a quick recap in case you missed it: you’re an accomplished student who has little to no social life thus far. you are certainly not the king of all frat boys’ girlfriend. but apparently, out of desperation to be left alone, keigo decides to tell a girl pursuing him that he has a girlfriend, and you happened to be the poor victim to his spontaneity. you don’t want to go through with it; you’ve got enough on your plate already, and adding fake girlfriend isn’t something to add to your resume. but keigo has some really close connections at a firm you’re looking to work for after graduation, and listen, you can’t deny that this opportunity to network isn’t amazing. besides, sometimes the things you don’t plan for can turn out pretty good in your favor... right?

you save me like this every time — rintarou suna x f!reader

the nurse & the vigilante. you and suna take turns playing hero. or, more accurately, there’s a masked, morally grey “hero” roaming the streets and no one knows their identity. you’re a fresh-out-of-college nurse working shitty hours and with the rise in crime, there’s a rise in patients. the last thing you want to come home to (home being your apartment that is pitifully comparable to that of a shoebox) is more work, but when there’s a guy in a mask currently bleeding out all over your brand new white rug, you find it terribly inconvenient that you took an oath to try to save all lives.

i don’t want my heart in your hands — kenjirou shirabu x f!reader

the sweet student & the grumpy teacher’s assistant. there’s nothing you wouldn't do to help out others. it’s the whole reason why you’re even in your first year of med school; you’re passionate about your pursuit of helping people and saving lives. but being too eager to help can do more harm than good, especially to yourself. for example, you might be taking a hard class that’s being taught by a notoriously difficult TA who is brutal in grading and probably a narcissist. he might also like to quote the student handbook and explain various times that group chats about the class can be classified as an academic violation. and he might even have screenshots that show you sharing notes and study guides in said group chats. he’s threatening to report you, and you’re getting desperate to not get kicked out of the program. there’s nothing that you can offer him, though. that is, until you happen to hear of his little predicament: his ex-girlfriend (who would even date him in the first place?) sent him a wedding invite; mainly to boast about how well she’s doing and how single and miserable he is. if shirabu is anything, it’s definitely prideful. he can’t decline her invite and let her win, but he can’t show up and admit defeat by being alone. his ego won’t allow him to be embarrassed like that. so, for a weekend, you are shirabu’s totally sweet and lovable girlfriend that absolutely adores him, and shirabu conveniently loses all the screenshots he claims are an academic violation. it’s a good deal. until his ex transfers to your university, and this act might have to go on longer than either of you planned for.

two weeks notice — shouto todoroki x f!reader

the secretary & the ceo. loyal, hardworking, and incredibly intelligent, you’re the secretary for the youngest todoroki son. newly elected as the ceo of his family’s business, shouto has a lot on his plate, and unluckily enough for him, you’re about to add to that when you turn in your two weeks notice. you’ve been with him ever since you were fresh out of college and he was just the little heir fighting for his life in the boardroom. he doesn’t want to see you go, but he understands why you’re leaving, which is why he wants you to accompany him on one last business trip. it’s a short three day long trip, but when his personal security detail inform him that it’s unsafe for him to travel back home safely, the two of you are trapped in a luxury vacation island together for at least a month minimum. and like any good businessman, shouto sees an opportunity in the worst situation; namely, he’s still got a chance to convince you to stay with him.

it’s the same damn thing that made my heart surrender — koutarou bokuto x f!reader

the schoolteacher & the firefighter. so, quick life update: your apartment has now been reduced to a pile of ashes and burnt rubble (read: you’re now homeless!); you’re currently living on a meager teacher’s salary because you, for some odd reason, decided to be a good person and wanted to positively influence the next generation (it never pays to be a good person); and your high school boyfriend (and first love... and the love you never really got over, but listen, it’s a work in progress — don’t question why it’s been a work in progress for the past 6 years and counting) is suddenly everywhere you go. the hot firefighter that saved you from your burning apartment? it’s bokuto. the person who’s kind enough to let you stay at their place literally for free until you can find a place of your own? also bokuto. the ex-boyfriend/high school sweetheart/first love you just can’t seem to shake? of course it’s bokuto. you’re just scared that it’s always going to be bokuto. and maybe for him, it’s always going to be you.

savior complex — tetsurou kuroo x f!reader

the next door neighbors. one minute, you’re living the absolute fucking teenage dream, driving to different parties in your custom wrapped, pink porsche (paid for by your father, of course), and the next thing you know, you’re suddenly making headlines as the infamous business mogul’s daughter/young heiress has a wild night out! first off, the photos taken from that night were at a hideously awful angle and everyone there is lucky that you’re too busy having the worst time of your life; otherwise, they would’ve been sent straight to court for having the audacity to release photos of you looking like that. most importantly, though, is that daddy dearest is not too happy with how you’re “ruining the family name”. (because the name is more important than the actual family). so, what does he do? he readjusts the terms of your trust fund — the funds that you were supposed to have access to the moment you turned twenty-one (a date that’s happening in just six more months!), and he calls you into his office to go over the new terms. one: you need to learn to provide for yourself and learn some humility, so it’s time you get — you almost gag every time you have to say the word — a job. two: you have to enroll in college. and three: no more making headlines that will ruin the family’s reputation. if you get a job, graduate from college, and stay on your bestest behavior, you finally receive your fortune that you swear is your birthright. the only problem is that you hate your new job (marketing for japan’s volleyball association — you only got here thanks to dear old dad), you hate your classes, and you might fail at the third condition your father set up because you’re about to go on a murderous rampage. your first victim? tetsurou fucking kuroo. the two of you get off on the worst foot possible, but you find some solace in knowing that just because he’s unavoidable at work, you at least will have some much needed time away from him when you make it to your apartment (the one your dad is forcing you to pay rent for). except, you get locked out of your own apartment, and who is there to witness your meltdown? kuroo. what a way to meet your new neighbor!

halfway happy — tooru oikawa x f!reader

the publicist & the celebrity. behind every charming celebrity is a team that has meticulously orchestrated their every move. for tooru oikawa, his team is spearheaded by none other than you: tokyo’s youngest and brightest publicist, ready to ensure that all news is good news when it’s his name leading the headlines. when fans start pointing out that it’s weird how every relationship he’s been in has failed and that all his exes are either engaged, married, or happily dating someone else for a long period, people are starting to tarnish the golden image you’ve spent years crafting. you know oikawa better than most, but his love life is something he’s never been open about, and you’ve never wanted to cross that line. when rumors about his relationships and supposed commitment issues start gaining actual harmful traction, you know you need to do something to fix this. tooru swears it’s because he’s never found the right time to find “the one”, and as his trusted publicist, you decide to intervene, do damage control, and kill two birds with one stone. you’ll find the perfect dream girl for oikawa, fabricate their relationship just the slightest so they always look happy and in love in the photos, push the narrative that oikawa has always wanted to settle down and has now found the right person for him. he saves his reputation, and you help him find his soulmate. the only issue? he’s pretty sure the person trying to save his reputation is his soulmate.

no more keepin’ score (now i just keep you warm) — kiyoomi sakusa x f!reader

the maneater & the womanizer. you’re named one of japan’s most beautiful models in the country. he’s one of the hottest bachelors and professional athletes in the country. the two of you together has the potential to be one of the most iconic pairings in all of japan’s pop culture history. the only issue? both of you are too prideful, stubborn, and maybe even a little scared to admit attraction to each other. alternatively: eleven times you and sakusa miss the opportunity to be together, and the one time you two finally let the tension snap.

like you’d get your knuckles bloody for me — wakatoshi ushijima x f!reader

the underground fighter & the ring girl. it’s bloodier. the rules are looser. the bets are higher. the fighters more unhinged, and the girls holding the cards in the ring are always a sight for sore (and bloody and bruised) eyes. the underground fighting scene in japan is less of a secret and more of a ludicrous business and the best source of entertainment. the fighters here are far more famous than the actual professional boxers, and the money to be made is insane. after an accident in the ring, wakatoshi “the powerhouse” ushijima, is forced to hang up his boxing gloves and step away from the professional sport. he’s still got a lot of fight left in him, and he finds himself turning to underground fighting, quickly rising through the ranks and making a name for himself as one of the most ruthless, formidable opponents in the game. you’re just the unfortunate girl struggling to make ends meet, but when you’re recruited to be one of the ring girls, you can’t walk away from the paycheck they’re promising you. ushijima is known for his steely demeanor; he’s less than human and more monster — at least, he is according to everyone who frequents these fights. he’s never been the type to get distracted, always laser focused on one thing and one thing only: winning the next fight. but the ring girl grimacing in the corner as he knocks out his opponent breaks that strict focus just the slightest. he can't afford any distractions, but you just might be his toughest opponent yet.

#haikyuu x reader #bnha x reader #megumi fushiguro x reader #keigo takami x reader #suna rinataro x reader #kenjirou shirabu x reader #shouto todoroki x reader #kotarou bokuto x reader #tetsurou kuroo x reader #tooru oikawa x reader #kiyoomi sakusa x reader #wakatoshi ushijima x reader #bound to fall in love #fic masterlist

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amadwinter · 3 months

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Making of Monday - Tracking Word Counts

On Making of Monday, we share behind the scenes of one of our works past, present, or future. All the little things that would fit into a DVD bonus content section: cut scenes, outlines, director's writer's commentary, or basically any thing that didn't make it into the final version. Send me an ask if you're interested in knowing little details about any particular fic!

This week, I decided to show my word count spreadsheet that I've been meticulously using and crafting for coming up on two years now. It wasn't built in a day, and I'm almost constantly tweaking it to make it look nice and functional as I keep writing.

Uh, fair warning. This is not a very exciting post. Unless you like numbers and data, like I do.

For the sake of my own sanity, I started a new Excel document for the new year. This is my Summary page for the year 2024. I have pages created already for each month but hide them when it isn't that month. I'll show the Overview page next after I've explained what you're looking at.

So what you see here is my monthly and annual writing totals. This only takes into account new words written, although the start number at the top of each yearly column includes my running word count. Each month's number is automatically updated from the corresponding month's page, and added up in the total column.

On the side, I have fun projections. So if I wanted to write x number of words per year, not counting the words I have already written, I would need to write y number of words per month with an average of z number of words per day. It's not something I pay too much attention to, just for fun. Below that is a projection of if I write the NaNoWriMo daily count (1667 words per day) or 1000 words per day, how much that would add up to at the end of the year.

This is the Overview page from last year (2023) plus December 2022 which is when I switched over from my previous Google Sheets document. Additionally at the bottom you can see the different monthly pages that are not hidden (I color coded them because I was bored one day).

This page keeps track of my daily totals in the form of a color gradient, linked to the monthly pages to get the totals.

Solid Red = 0

Solid Yellow = 1000

Solid Green = 1667 (NaNoWriMo Daily; 50,000 words in a 30 day month)

Originally, the idea was to be able to look at it and see if there were time periods that I wasn't writing as well due to being busy for various reasons, so I could be able to predict in the future what conditions weren't great for writing. But an interesting side effect is it's also able to track my good days and my bad days for health reasons.

That random number you see on the right side is my highest daily word count. I was curious about it, but I couldn't figure out a way to make it look pretty and fit in with everything else.

This is my month page, divided by each individual project. Y is series or event with multiple fics involved, Z is one-shots, two-shots, or very short fics. The greyed out ones at the top are ones I'm not actively working on, the ones in green are fics that I am either actively working on or trying to work on.

Also at the top are the new words added each month (which is the cell used in other pages to keep track of the monthly number), the total words in all my documents, and the daily average for the month.

The color gradient at the top for each day follows the same pattern as before; Solid Red = 0, Solid Yellow = 1000, Solid Green = 1667+

I keep track of the word count for each chapter, add the total, subtract it from the previous day, and boom, that's my daily total. If there are times where I delete things, I throw it into a document called "Binned" to balance the numbers. That way, I never subtract from the amount of words I've written, only add.

While it may look like a very simple sheet, it is very messy with formulas, conditional formatting, etc. If I were more skilled at Excel, I could probably improve it even more, but at this point, there's very little maintenance needed to keep it going and I can focus on actually writing.

In theory.

#making of monday #writing process #no i didn't almost forget to post this #what are you talking about?#this might only make sense in my own brain

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deludedfantasy · 4 months

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Ao3 Wrapped

I'm slightly insane and took an Excel class in college, so I've been keeping track of all the fics I read in a spreadsheet (two spreadsheets actually; I like to keep things separated by fandom). Which means I have the data to create my own little Ao3 wrapped!

In total, across two fandoms I read 384 fics which totaled up to 9,562,810 words!

For a more fandom specific breakdown:

Supernatural

For Supernatural, I read 250 fics, which totaled 7,490,167 words.

The average length of the SPN fics I read was 29,960.668 words. The median length was 16,901 words.

The honor of longest SPN fic I read this year goes to Raise the Black by emmbrancsxx0 which clocks in at 246,524 words. It's a really fun and immersive historical pirate AU for Destiel. Definitely give it a read if you're a Destiel fan and like pirates.

I don't keep track of pairings because I pretty much only read Destiel, so just assume that's what all of this.

This chart shows the percentage of multi-chapter fics to oneshots. A pretty even split! When you take into account the average word count, this isn't surprising. What can I say, SPN loves their longfics.

This chart shows a breakdown of ratings. Unsurprisingly, a large chunk were Explicit, with Teen in second and Mature in third.

Trigun

For Trigun, I read 134 fics, which totaled 2,072,643 words.

The average length of the Trigun fics I read was 15,467.48507. The median length was 4,606 words.

The honor of longest Trigun fic I read this year goes to come and see by avoidingavoidance, which clocks in at 273,265 words (and counting!). If you want a well-plotted Wolfwood centric what-if for what happens after season 1, this is your fic. It's got everything: Vashwood, pining, the boys being idiots, Vash being a literal cat for part of the fic. Truly, it's awesome.

When I first got into Trigun, I was reading Vashwood exclusively, but then got sidetracked by other pairings. Unfortunately, the way I have my spreadsheet set up, it's not easy to keep track of this or count it, so that's something for me to keep in mind when I set up my spreadsheet for next year. A column for pairing will be a new addition!

Here's the Trigun chart for the percentage of multi-chapter fics to oneshots. It skews a lot more heavily to oneshots but considering the fandom only revved up this year, that's not surprising. Not many people have had the time to write longfics yet! In 2024, it'll likely balance out a little more. Plus, I have a slew of multi-chap fics saved in my marked for later that I will definitely get to in the new year.

Next, we have the ratings chart. A pretty similar breakdown to SPN, with Explicit coming out as the most read. However, I was reading a lot more Teen, Mature, and General fics in this fandom. Trigun loves its character studies, and I'm so here for it.

There you have it! A mini Ao3 wrapped. Hope you enjoyed. Now I go to spruce up my spreadsheets for another year of fic reading. Happy new year!

#dani talks #supernatural #trigun #supernatural fanfic #trigun fanfic #ao3 wrapped #fanfic

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therhythmafterthesummer · 1 year

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Hey! I was curious how you made your spreadsheet for all your fics - was there a certain way you set it up or a tutorial you followed? I’m drowning in the number of docs I have and this seems like a great way to organize them - if you can’t remember then it’s all good! I just thought I would ask 💕

hi hi hi so about the spreadsheet i was talking about with @tasteleeknow in this post, it's pretty simple actually, it might take a bit of time but it's been worth it in the long run for me. i'll try to be a thorough as i can !

first, of course, go to google sheets and create a new one (i suppose you can also do it in MS Excel, this is just what i had available at the time)

like i said in the post, i used these items for the first row: title, character, status, reader's gender, published on ao3, published on tumblr, AU1, AU2, publish date, length, word count, fluff, smut, angst, other themes. so add those or whichever ones you need (i originally had two for "group" and "member" just in case i decided to write for different groups, but since i haven't i haven't had the need to use them, i suppose smth like this can be useful if you write for several fandoms):

once you have them there, select the items and click on this button and "create new filter view", this will help out later if you want to see only specific things:

once you have that, you can start filling in your second row with your info:

now, this step i did bc it makes it easier for me to find stuff, i fixed the position of the very first row and the columns from "title" to "character". this way when you scroll you can always see those items. so first, select the entire first row (you can do so by clicking on the "1" on the left), right click, click on "view more row actions" and then "freeze up to row 1":

then do the same for the columns you want. if you want to freeze a set of letters (in my case, i want letter A to letter D to be fixed), go to the last letter in the group, click on it so it selects the entire column, go to "view more column actions" and then "freeze up to column D" (this letter will depend on the one you need of course, it won't always be D):

once you have that is just a matter of filling everything in :)

i realised yesterday i can also link directly to google docs in the spreadsheet, so i have been adding those links in the "title" column for easy access !

(to add a link you just select the cell you want, right click, "insert link"):

and then you can either add a link to the web (like an AO3 link) or you can search your google doc:

so i hope that helps ! in the originaly post i described some more nuanced details on the specific items but yea this is the gist of it ! hope it wasn't too convoluted. if anything isn't clear let me know and i'll try to elaborate further :)

#itsallaboutkey #ask #on writing #or more like #on how to organise your writing lol

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synthetickitsune · 1 year

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hi!! out of all the idols you stan, who would you date, fuck and marry 😋 and why! hi hi just a lil fun question im curious about

Hey~, anon - and, uh, I love you?? Thanks for asking, I spent too much time thinking abou this, and I love thinking about stuff!! I literally made excel spreadsheet for it lmao

Also I'm switching fuck for ~spicy cuddles~ (free to interpretation) because of my ace ass lol

tl;dr comprehensive version:

Date: Yonghoon (Onewe) - this is not a want, this is a need just ult things </3

Spicy cuddles: Jaeyoon (SF9) - this

Marry: Jun (Seventeen) - I can't pretend I'm normal about him anymore

Full version with all the groups under the cut because it got too long~ (and F for the groups that didn't make it in anyway)

(Also why am I never marrying my biases??? lmao...)

Ateez

Date: Yeosang - all the members keep saying he’s really innocent and ??? that’s very appealing? also I want someone who’ll make gummy bears concerts with me </3

Spicy cuddles: Seonghwa - maybe I wanna get as close to fucking a jedi master as I can or maybe I just think Hwa would be so gentle when cuddling that it makes me wanna cry, who knows

Marry: San - I just love him, ok? and he seems like a really gentle, nice guy, he's so funny and caring, and I love his cat so much tbh

EXO

Date: Chanyeol - I love him but I think he’s too high energy for me lmao and I’d feel bad I’m not as sporty + he gives me the vibes of dating for a while and then realizing it’s better to be best friends for some reason, lmao, idk but it’s very wholesome in my mind

Spicy cuddles: Lay - he’s so cute fml, also my man needs some break and we could nap together afterwards

Marry: Baekhyun - look, I saw one vid of him being super calm and soft and making pottery and some ‘ㅋ’ cup and I’ve loved him ever since okay? also I want the fucking cup

Monsta X

Date: Hyungwon - he's besties with Jeonghan and I'll trust Hannie's judgment of character lmao

Spicy cuddles: Kihyun - look at the man, he's got me on my knees I love him and think he'd be so comfy to cuddle with?? he'd give the best headpats and backrubs??

Marry: I.M - something about his vibe makes me cry, I wanna be lonely with him </3

Oneus

Date: Leedo - a gentle giant pt. 1, and as much as I don't like kids, seeing him so soft with children makes my brain go haywire

Spicy cuddles: Hwanwoong - he's really fun, y'know?

Marry: Seoho - he's good at everything he does and hella smart, I need a man like that lol

Onewe

Date: Yonghoon - look I've thought about this unholy amount of time and it's breaking my heart, honestly, but like Hoonie strikes me as a pretty realistic guy and idk how that would work out but I just wanna try it to make sure lmao 😭

Spicy cuddles: Harin - a gentle giant pt. 2, and I'd feel safe with him

Marry: Kanghyun - he's just like me for real and I need someone to talk about books and space with </3

Seventeen

Date: Jeonghan - I'm very soft for this man and I love him so much but also I'd flinch every time he'd hit the stove or the door lmao

Spicy cuddles: Joshua - gentleman (? 🤨), his tiddies and arms would make me feel safe

Marry: Jun - no thoughts, head empty, kicking, screaming, crying just one chance, pls mr. wen 🥲

SF9

Date: Inseong - nothing as attractive as a smart fox-like man who's also cute and chaotic

Spicy cuddles: Jaeyoon - look at the man I'm a firm believer in human heater Jaeyoon agenda and you know this pic? I want that

Marry: Zuho - his cats, his gentle nature, his squishy cheeks, his cute smile... him 🤧 (Hwiyoung was a candidate n.2 but after all the clips of him talking about his family and having a family of his own, I don't think I could handle seeing a healthy and functioning family or create one T-T)

Stray Kids

Date: Han - he's cute and I just know he's the sweetest, also makes the best sad love songs

Spicy cuddles: Lee Know - make it regular cuddles and invite the cats in I just want a kitty

Marry: Bang Chan - duh. he's already got 7 kids, he can handle one more

Victon

Date: Hanse - I think he'd be a really interesting person to hang out with?? me and my weirdass vibes again, but two friends fucking around and finding out it's not working after all?

Spicy cuddles: Seungsik - look, I just think he looks like a polar bear and I want him to crush me with his love

Marry: Sejun - I can't live with the possibility he eats cereal like that and I guess the ring would add some more power to my influence lmao, also he's just neat and I love him

#💌 non nons~#tumblr games

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this-is-not-a-slow-burn · 3 months

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Saw a tiktok about how bosses don't know how to use Excel, and I am absolutely the boss in this situation. But only specifically about Excel.

I'm GenX so I grew up using computers, like literally we had a computer lab in elementary school, and I was coding in BASIC from books at home when I was like 10. I programmed the VCRs, TVs, answering machines, I've done hardware and software tech support for OEM systems, dial up and cable internet (long before "tier one" existed. we did it ALL), and escalated cell phone trouble tickets. I have been online since *before* internet access was available. I know all the parts you need to build a computer, and how to build a computer from them. I've taken A+ certification classes, have alpha and beta tested software at several jobs, (and two games), have worked with Excel at two different jobs, have taken THREE Excel classes.

Most people would think that Excel would just naturally be easy for me to use, because tech-nerd.

Here's a secret. I cannot use Excel to do anything from scratch. It's a horrifying application to me. I hate it with the fire of

If it's manipulating a spreadsheet someone else created, I can muddle through. But using it from scratch to create spreadsheets etc? Nope.

I'm one of those people who usually can sit down in front of software and figure out the basics pretty quickly, because I am information gathering oriented. I will click everything clickable, read all the menus, check all the "advanced" settings etc.

But Excel thwarts my brain at every turn. It just does not click for me. It does not operate the way I think it is going to, and is not remotely intuitive. Most of the things it does are mystical magic that only true wizards can unlock.

It's just funny what brains can and cannot do, from person to person. Like not just "didn't have the chance to learn" but a lack of whatever it is that makes things click.

#Excel is theee devil.

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krausemiles18 · 4 months

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The Lazy Option to Keyword

The format (or "off-facet") rule takes impact each time the open brace is omitted after the keyword the place, let, do, or of. Typically, keyword research takes place within the early phases of campaigns and may provide a foundation for future initiatives, campaigns, or content. By doing all your keyword analysis the best approach, your able to have a constructive impact on your content performance. To help you discover the suitable key phrases and to create successful on-line content, we’ve build the free Keyword Analysis Instrument. Understand that a Media Middle Pc can only support over-the-air digital or excessive-definition indicators -- free alerts that you simply obtain by way of antenna. If you are trying to start out a new career and have to earn a certificate, or if you are all for acquiring a brand new ability, chances are high you could find a class on the web. This can also be good if you are just in search of different ways on how you can keyword research. Engines like google are searching for associated, organized content material. Tip: Are you a WordPress consumer?

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“For organic keyword analytics and to track the rank of a site, I exploit SerpBook,” says Reuben Kats of GrabResults. “Internally, we use SEMrush for all of our clients. This can be a great tool to have in your again pocket for purchasers or to rapidly sanity examine search volume for a particular keyword. For extra details about continuing education and associated topics, try the links on the subsequent page. A keyword, in the context of search engine optimization, is a specific word or phrase that acts as a shortcut to sum up the content material of a page or site. Thus, semantic matching mechanisms needs to be included within the keyword semantic search routine. If the result keyword is a query keyword, then clearly it is relevant. Reuse is definitely potential, but is probably not very useful in the keyword search surroundings the place query formulation is simple. Sullivan, Danny. japan kawaii fashion to Search engine optimization." Search Engine Watch. One in all its highly helpful characteristic is search analysis part displaying you which of them keywords brought most clicks to your site. To carry out a stable keyword evaluation you should begin with the fundamentals. To additional improve results, Goggles has a characteristic that helps you crop the image, leaving probably the most pertinent (and recognizable) parts for analysis.

#Kawaii #Kawaii fashion #Kawaii Shop

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hipsterholt · 1 year

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Let’s Budget

Wow much exciting. I take a few years off from blogging and the first thing I want to do when I get back is build a budget app. Look... I promise, it's more exciting than it sounds. We're going to get into a lot, so let's get started!

When I make a new project, I like to make something that'll excite me. We all have those projects that we start, and after `x` number of commits, we're bored and move on. Not the case here. I've spent the past two years working on a budget for my wife and I. It's nothing strict, but a collection of google spreadsheets that track the comings and goings of our money. The flow goes like this:

Make an annual budget mid to end December the year before using the annual budget spreadsheet. This is expected money spent on defined categories and excpected money in from various jobs

Keep track of spending per week using the Weekly_Template. This has three pages: Daily, Expenses, and Earnings. Daily shouldn't need anything done to it, it's all excell functions that calculate everything. The Expenses page is where I add any expenses for the week (dollar amount, account, category, and notes). The earnings are where any income goes. I also start the week off by putting last week's Account info (checking, CC, and pending) into the earnings sheet

Saturday mornings, I make a copy of the Weekly Spreadsheet with the date matching the "Week Ending" date in the Annual spreadsheet. I.e. On Saturday December 31st 2022 (HAPPY NEW YEAR) I'll copy over the Weekly Spreadsheet and call it "Jan 6th". This gets copied into a folder on google drive like this: `/budget/details/2023`

Also on Saturday mornings, I take everything from Column D rows 18-28 in the Daily sheet of the Weekly spreadsheet and copy the values into the approriate row in the Annual sheet. I.e. On Saturday January 7th 2023, I'll grab those values in the Weekly Template titled "Jan 6th" and copy it into Column B rows 9-19 of the Annual spreadsheet

Of course, there might be smaller things that happen (I.e. transfers to brokerage account, transfer to savings, IRA contributions, bonuses, etc.). But high level, it's pretty straight forward and all I really need to do is put amounts into the weekly spreadsheet and validate that the sum matches what's in our bank account. Also, that we aren't straying too far away from the end goal of saving money.

Ok, so, simple enough. But all of the copying/pasting/making new files has gotten so repetitive. I'm down to just keep track of spending, but this extra work sucks about 15 minutes to half an hour out of my weekend. There HAS to be a better way to do this, right? You are correct! All of my sheets are in google drive and google has a pretty straight forward way to CRUD them! I bet we could make an app that, when run, will copy all the values I need and create all the files I need. I don't think it'll be able to budget my life, but we gotta start somewhere.

But lets go one step farther and make this even better! Here's what I'm thinking so that by the time 2023 rolls around, we'll have something that works for me!

Build a node app to handle the weekly budget saturday transfers

Create an EC2 instance on AWS

Create Express App

Connect Node App to Express App

Deploy to EC2

Ok, that's pretty much it! This will span several blog posts and hopefully be informative. I'll be writing everything in TypeScript at this repo here. The spreadsheets are in there as well. Looking forward to it!

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greysadv · 2 years

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Programs like microsoft access for mac

#Programs like microsoft access for mac android#

#Programs like microsoft access for mac license#

Zoho Creator – Subscription $15 or $30 per month You can import data from a number of different sources such as CSV files and Excel spreadsheets. You also get automatic backups which is good. If you are going to use a number of different devices to access your Ninox databases then a really good feature is that it synchronizes in real-time. You can create different apps such as CRM, account management, timesheets and project management and more. It is relatively easy to create custom forms and data fields with Ninox. These include some built-in templates, drag and drop formulas and custom actions. There are a number of features with Ninox that help you to create your applications. I found it pretty easy to use Ninox and it didn’t take long for me to create an app. It is another FileMaker alternative because you can create customized databases which you can turn into applications for your business.

#Programs like microsoft access for mac android#

Ninox is a popular database application that is cloud-based so Mac and Windows computers and Android and iOS mobile devices can use it. I’ve been looking at FileMaker alternatives recently and as someone that does not have a lot of experience of creating customized applications, it was an interesting experience, to say the least. It is still not something that you can jump into without a good idea of how databases work and how everything fits together though.įileMaker is not the only relational database out there for businesses to use to create their own applications. At the end of the day, it is a relational database system where you can store records and then retrieve the information using a front end such as a web browser.Ī lot of businesses like FileMaker because it is reasonably easy to make custom applications without a great deal of technical knowledge.

#Programs like microsoft access for mac license#

The cheapest subscription plan for FileMaker is $19 per month for 5 to 10 users and if you want the perpetual license it is $540 per user (ouch!).įileMaker is quite a popular application for businesses and they can make their own custom applications from it. FileMaker will work on both Mac and Windows computers and is available on a subscription or perpetual basis.

#Programs like microsoft access for mac

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kirkeskildsen4 · 2 years

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Mind Mapping With View Your Mind - The Teachings Of The Icons

Most business owners know that in order to succeed, one must set direction. It's not just about setting the goals, but in executing what it takes to reach those desires. Mind mapping software can be a vital tool in setting and reaching your business goals. Discover have a visual representation of your goals to touch on to almost all times. Whether a goals change or everything doesn't go exactly according to plan, mind maps bear in mind easy adjusting with click with the mouse. Considerably more no wasted paper simply no need to redraw the human brain map. Instance, this may of brainstorming for objectives allows you to create a very detailed report on business intentions. This allows in order to definitely focus each and every your energy on taking step-by-step actions to accomplish your ultimate business success. mindjet mindmanager latest version start with the main topic, question, or issue in the center of a sizeable piece of paper set horizontally. Draw a single line out from the center for each single word sub-topic. You can add any excess sub-topics once you need but only write one word or a brief phrase each and every. Then for mindjet mindmanager full draw single lines with second level words, concepts, etc, each with its own line. Should a small symbol or picture can be substituted in your word, accomplish that. The computer softwares available for online mind-mapping have libraries of symbols and images to drop into the map replacing some for the words and making the mind-map payday loans no faxing vivid and memorable. You can store contact info, websites, stretch out ideas to add everything you may need to do and casually. Your goal is put everything in your brain onto this radiating circle of lines annotated with words, highlighters, colors, clouds, flags and then for any other symbol that be of benefit further identify just people have objective. PDFs are a good way Mindjet MindManager to get people discover your documents as you intended. Difficulty is these. While the Adobe Acrobat can get done this, the $449 sale price makes it very unsttractive. Let me introduce PDFCreator. Instead, I started "learning while go." I'd research one aspect, determine the puzzle pieces for the section and work on assembling them as I learned. Of course, I'd rapidly learn to complete that entire section of puzzle pieces, pieces to an alternative section must be created for starters. And on and on it went. Surround yourself with the tools of the trade which could make job just a little easier. Software tools for project planning, task management (Gantt chart software), issue and risk logs and my personal favourite - mind mapping software. When you are not much into technology then spreadsheet software regarding Microsoft Excel is pretty versatile and can be for more areas of project administration. This has changed so much in paid traffic . decade and is also fast as being a mainstream learning tool for students and employees. A lot of businesses have benefited within this and schools are commencing teach it too. So take mindjet mindmanager crack for windows of it because others possess.

#MINDJET MINDMANAGER

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mybrainproblems · 2 years

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What is spreadsheetsnatural?

Spreadsheetsnatural is a project I started thinking about a few months ago and finally started working on recently. Its purpose is to create a timeline of what happened during the final season of Carver era (when Dabb would have been tapped for co-showrunner), all of the Dabb-Singer era of spn, the development timeline of W*lker and using all of that as a basis to speculate on how those factors potentially impacted the trajectory of s15/the finale/destiel. I'm trying to remain impartial as I gather info but I do have my own theories based on knowledge of the entertainment industry which I've posted about before.

The sheer quantity of information I'm looking at necessitated the creation of multiple spreadsheets (which is why I've called this spreadsheetsnatural) in order to keep track of the below information from 2015 through 2020.

Content of showrunner-written/significant (e.g. 15x09) episodes

Information we have available from the scripts and other supplemental materials that have been acquired

Official announcements

Info provided at cons/in press interviews and

"key" episode air dates

[Image: a screenshot of an Excel spreadsheet of information about the supernatural series that includes episode air dates, network announcements, press materials and info from cons. All info is organized chronologically and color-coded by season. Citation links are included where applicable.]

That's only a partial screenshot of it and at a guess, this spreadsheet is maybe 10% complete. This partial screenshot is barely even a first pass based on the info I already have and I'm just starting the process of pulling more info from press materials and cons. I have no idea when I will finish this because of just how much info I'm looking for. If anybody has information that sounds like it might fit in with this please let me know! If you can provide a source that would be amazing (just who you think said it and a year/con is a great help!)

If you're interested in some other info I've already posted, everything is tagged on my blog as spreadsheetsnatural. If some of the posts seem a little unhinged, those are probably from the day I forgot to eat while doing research.

some additional explanation about what kicked off this project, what my spreadsheets are and what info I'm looking at below the cut

I'd post more spreadsheet screenshots but the rest are in pretty rough shape and need a clean-up/redo since I've added more factors I want to look at. The current spreadsheets that I have are:

"dabbnatural" - where it all started! all episodes written/co-written by Andrew Dabb; I'm now going to be adding additional sheets to the workbook to include his story editor credits and also his earlier producer credits (showrunners get producer credits by default)

"script hunt reference" - what it says on the box. a spreadsheet with all documents available from spn script hunt organized by season, episode, document type, revision date, original air date and writer (chronological by latest revision date)

"episode guide" - oof. this one I haven't started yet but at a minimum, this spreadsheet needs to contain every episode, writer, story editor, producer, director, air date seasons 10-15. I'd like to fill in back to s4 eventually.

"spreadsheetsnatural master" - compiling all relevant info into one timeline document

And after all that, you might ask why I started this insane project! Well, like many hellers I'm curious as fuck about what happened with s15, the finale, the confession, the lamp... I also have a relative who used to work in the entertainment industry (including network TV) on the marketing & market research side so I got a weirdly close look at how the proverbial sausage is made. The moment I heard there was market research, I was set down the footpath to this rabbit hole.

Short version of this in the tags but if you've made it this far: An actual investigative report on what happened would likely take years and a professional journalist or two with far better access than I, a person outside of the entertainment industry, will ever have. People are going to be under NDAs or unwilling to risk their professional reputations & careers over this and especially not just to talk to a curious fan. This is something that either a person in the industry needs to release with receipts or a journalist needs to hunt down. I am neither of those.

The people who are most responsible for this mishegoss are far higher up the food chain than any of us will ever have access to and I'd like to start assigning blame to them vs. actors.

#i just know i'm going to be making gantt charts like i'm doing my fucking job or something #an actual expose on this would likely take years and a professional journalist with solid industry contacts #this is just a fun fan project to maybe find some interesting links between things (kinda like stackednatural for research nerds)#spreadsheetsnatural #spn #destiel

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greenninjagal-blog · 3 years

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The Rumor Mill Game (pt4)

I swear I didn’t forget about this au. This chapter is just....long.

Welcome back to this mess of an au :) If you need a refresher, you can find Part Three [here!] Or if you’re new check out the first part [here!]

Summary: Logan is...dealing with the fallout of him and his coworker, Remus, having created a rumor about them being married and now apparently having a kid except not because Logan screamed at the top of his lungs that Virgil wasn’t his kid. His boss has a different definition for what “dealing” actually means.

Words: 8292 (Holy shit remember when this au was 2k words)

Read on Ao3 || My General Writing Masterlist

When Logan had seen his boss after he made Virgil cry, he hadn’t expected it to end up like this.

Granted when he hadn’t exactly been expecting anything. He hadn’t been looking ahead, hadn’t been making plans, hadn’t been thinking at all. Which was most likely how he ended up outside the bar in the first place.

Logan could, of course, count the number of times he had been drunk on one hand. College had been a time for experimenting, and of course for his twenty-first birthday his friends at the time had been insistent that he needed to imbibe an unholy amount of alcohol in one night. They had turned it into an experiment, where Logan documented exactly what he was feeling after each drink and he still had the notes in his desk at home, despite the fact that his handwriting had become illegible after the fifth drink and someone had spilled an orange soda based tonic on the third page. The notes themselves were worthless, but they served as a memoir to people who he no longer associated with and a younger version of himself who had still been learning.

And Logan did have a soft spot for that imbecile: Twenty-one-year-old Logan Ackroyd who still believed in the goodness of people and who wanted to change the world and who could fall in lov--

Logan pitied him-- that kid he used to be-- which he was certain that his younger self would be indignant about. Logan always did hate when people pitied him. Those emotions had rarely ever been genuine, rarely ever been helpful, rarely been productive. What was he to do about people feeling bad for him? About others being disappointed? About others making assumptions about him and how he felt?

He didn’t need pity, and he didn’t want it. Not when he got rejected to his first three colleges, not when flunked that English class and had to pay to retake it the next year, not when he had bought that ring and gotten down on one knee and made a whole carefully edited speech and--

And he’s not nearly drunk enough to deal with these types of thoughts. Or any thoughts for that matter. Wouldn’t it just be great to stop thinking?

Then he wouldn’t have to remember the looks on his coworkers faces when he storming into the office less than fifteen minutes after initially leaving for lunch and demanded that Beatrice turn in her overdue spreadsheets in twenty minutes or he’d have her fired before slamming his office door hard enough to crack that frosted glass, or the look on Remus- fucking- Prince’s face when he tried to act like everything that had happened was not his fault and that Logan had taken the game to far by himself without any sort of prompting from Remus, or the look on Virgil’s face when Logan lost his self control.

Like an idiot. Like an asshole. Like someone who doesn’t think before he acts.

Like someone who should be alone for the rest of his life, because he can’t seem to get a hold of those useless emotions of his.

And Logan wanted so very badly to blame Remus Prince for this whole endeavor, the whole production, the whole catastrophe. He wanted to say that without Remus he never would have gotten that angry, wouldn’t have had that conversation, wouldn’t have even gotten Thai today.

Logan wanted to say that, but really it's his own fault. If he had just dismissed Remus’s rumor in the beginning, if he had just told Jen and Quin that his personal business was his own, if he had just ignored the urge to get coffee and finished the spreadsheets without getting up that last night.

His fourth finger itched around the base, the area where that little silver ring had been sitting for less than a day. It was ridiculous, utterly ridiculous, because Logan had never worn a ring before and now suddenly the absence of it caused his skin to crawl in a most unpleasant, unproductive way.

Distantly Logan realized that by gifting Remus such a wonderful present, he had also thrown away four hundred dollars. And perhaps ironically Logan noted that he feels annoyed about it-- four hundred dollars had been sitting in a pocket of a dress jacket in the corner of his office for over nine months and he had tossed it aside in a fit of impulsive anger.

Logan had not been hurting for money recently, with how decently he was paid, and the amount of overtime he worked, and how little time he had taken off since that disastrous night.

But perhaps he might have been able to return it to the jewelers and weathered the terrible, awful pitying looks they would give him when he requested about their refund policy or a location where he might be able to sell it himself. It was a ring that was worth four hundred dollars and he had given it to Remus, and isn’t it funny that that’s farther than he got with the one for whom the ring had been originally intended?

And as Logan downed his next rum and coke of the night, he hoped that Remus found a better use for it. Newton knows it hadn't done any good for Logan.

(Its stupid, Logan knew, to blame a ring for the way that he had screeched “He’s not and never will be our son!” Its stupid, Logan knew, to blame a ring for the way that Remus had hummed mischievously “I think I enjoy being fake-married to you, Logan." Its stupid, Logan knew, to blame a ring for the the way his last partner had said “We should see other people”. Its stupid, stupid, stupid--)

“Hmmm,” A voice behind him said, “I thought I would find you here!”

Logan didn’t realize he had closed his eyes until he heard the voice and felt every atom in his body figuratively threaten to combust. He wasn’t drunk enough to be thinking about him, and he most certainly wasn’t drunk enough to turn and look at the incessantly, perky man that had decided to sit down next to him.

Logan waved at the bartender and ordered another rum and coke and watched his freshly emptied glass disappear like the handful of others he didn’t bother to keep count of.

“And I’ll have two waters, please!” Patton Hart added with one of his peppy, happy, insufferable laughs, before turning to face Logan. “Hiya, Lo! It's been so long since we’ve seen each other!”

“Not long enough,” Logan disagreed, with a rueful smile that should very clearly, very precisely detail how much he does not want company at the current moment. “Don’t you have things to be doing tonight, Mr. Hart?”

Patton hummed, pressing his lips together as he thought-- a monumental task for someone like him, surely. Logan was partially convinced that if he removed his glasses he might be able to see the squirrels beginning to run on that rusted wheel in the other man’s brain. If Logan was of a less logical mind he might even be brazen enough to call this the first time Patton had used his brain all week.

“Well,” Patton said, carefully settling himself on the stool next to Logan. “I was graciously informed by my son that he would be enjoying the perks of being a teenager with no bedtime tonight and along with where exactly I could shove my homemade lasagna.” He laughed lightly, “Kids, these days! He really does keep me on my toes!”

Logan did his best not to roll his eyes. “I do not know the whereabouts of your son, Mr. Hart.”

“Patton,” He said easily, “And I’m not here for my son. I’m here for you, Logan.”

“If this is about the glass in my door, you are very capable of taking that out of my paycheck.” Logan told him.

The bartender placed Logan’s new rum and coke in front of him and he reached for it almost immediately, only stopping when Patton’s hand landed on his forearm.

“Mr. Hart--”

“Patton,” Patton corrected with that smile that Logan suspected was the worst thing in the world. Worse than Virgil’s blank expression when he told them to get out, worse than Remus’s smug one when he suggested that Logan did indeed enjoy the ability to manipulate his coworkers, worse than Beatrice faulty excel sheets, than broken glass of his door, than a ring he never wanted to see again and yet he still felt like it was missing from his finger.

“Mr. Hart,” Logan said again, “I am going to get horrifically drunk tonight, and I will be calling out sick tomorrow, regardless of what you say. So my advice to you is, say anything of importance now, before I am too incoherent to register and respond accordingly.”

“That doesn’t sound too smart there, kiddo!” Patton said, like he was any older than Logan was.

“I do not feel like being smart right now,” Logan said snippily. Because being smart involved thinking, and Logan had done quite enough thinking for the day. He was tired of thinking, tired of memories, tired of the lump in his chest that had formed during his lunch break and hadn’t dissolved in the eight hours since. He was tired.

“Would you like me to be smart for you?” Patton asked.

Ah.

Yes, Logan remembered suddenly with just a few words why he hated Patton Hart so much. Why he hated those too-wide brown eyes, those stupid freckles, that soft smile. Why he hated the way that Patton had tracked him down despite the fact that he had turned off his phone, the way that Patton had ordered two waters, the way that he hadn’t taken off his jacket. The way that he had taken out his keys and put them on the bar counter between them and Logan could pick out his own house key from the jumbled mess of bits and bobs.

“I heard something pretty interesting today,” Patton said, when Logan didn’t reply because he was too busy remembering why he hated Patton so much.

“Please don’t pretend like you didn’t know about my so-called affair before I did.” Logan snapped. “Honestly, Patton!” Logan dropped his arm from the glass and instead pressed his knuckles to his forehead. “Playing dumb about your own company is my least favroite thing about you.”

“I thought you hated my laugh the most.” Patton looked at him, letting the smile slip into something more serious.

“I hate everything about you.”

“Pay for the drinks, Lo.” Patton told him, “And I’ll take you home. We can have some of my lasagna and watch a space documentary, like we’re twenty years old again.”

Logan hated Patton and hated the way his chest ached at the offer. His knuckles bore into the side of his head, jabbing the frame of his own glasses into this temple. He hated the way that Patton was looking at him, soft and sweet and naive.

He hated the way his fingers itched to take Patton’s hand and go home.

“And after all that,” Patton continued so lightly, “You can tell me all about how Remus Prince got under your skin.”

Logan’s hand slammed on the counter, so suddenly he surprised himself. Patton, however, didn’t flinch, didn’t even blink, didn’t react other than to hold that smile.

“I am not drunk enough to be talking about Remus Prince,” Logan spat. “Especially not to you, Patton.”

Patton was quiet and at first, Logan really had thought that he had won something-- he thought that perhaps Patton would grant him mercy and let him drown his sorrows alone and miserable in a bar until he forgot his own name. But Patton was too good of a friend and Logan really should hate him less for that.

“You know,” Patton said with a cold type of humor that doused Logan with awareness. Bad awareness. The type of awareness that sunk it’s metaphorical claws into Logan’s chest and pierced straight through his heart before Patton finished what he was saying. “I think….yeah that does sound familiar. Do you remember the last time you said you weren’t drunk enough to tell me something?”

Logan did.

Logan couldn’t forget if he tried.

And he had tried so very hard for so very long-- except that Remus Prince had waltzed into Logan’s life, had called him a Robot, had smirked at him and run their coworkers around like cattle with pretty little words. Except that Remus Prince had gotten bored and decided that the only logical next course of action was to mess with Logan’s personal life.

Except that Remus Prince had played along with the rumor game, and smiled at him, and kissed him, and---

And Logan had started thinking---

And Logan’s mouth had started moving--

And Virgil face had--

Logan reached for the glass in front of him, reaching for the cool ice and the spritzy carbonation and the burn of the rum.

Patton watched him, blinking in the long, slow, dumb way of his that had fooled just about every person that he had come in contact with. With the goofy smile and the habit of deliberately misunderstanding key phrases and making puns and jokes when things were tense, it was hard to see him as anything other than a rich son who became CEO via thinly veiled nepotism.

Logan knocked back the drink, blinking back the burn behind his eyes that were from the alcohol and definitely not from the lump in his throat that had started dissolving.

He didn’t want to close his eyes, because he knew what he would see when he did: a nice suit, a fancy dinner, a walk to the bridge dotted with fairy lights of all things. He’d see that stupid ring, that stupid face, that stupid end of the night that everyone had told him would be nice, and perfect, and everything he would ever want!

And he didn’t want to think about how it had not been nice or perfect or anything either of them had ever wanted!

He didn’t want to think about how years ago he had come to a bar just like this, and tried to get so drunk he could pretend that it hadn’t happened, and Patton had shown up then and offered him a job and--

“He wants to go by Janus now,” Patton said, picking up one of the waters and taking a sip.

Logan squinted at him and tried not to be happy about the distraction from his own thoughts, “Who?”

“My son,” Patton said, like it was obvious he had switched back to a neutral topic. “He told me earlier during our phone call he wants to go by Janus, now. He said he’s hated the name Dante for forever. Can you believe it, Lo?”

Logan couldn’t actually. Because he had known Patton since they themselves were teenagers, since before Patton had brought up how empty being a CEO was without anyone to come home too, since Patton had first invited him to Sunday brunch and introduced him to the child he called “son”. Logan had babysat Dante when Patton had business trips and Dante had always been proud of himself, of his better-than-the-status-quo lifestyle, of his name that held power and prestige and weight.

Dante had been practicing saying his name in the mirror since before his voice cracked. Dante Hart, future CEO. Dante Hart, son of Patton Hart. Dante Hart.

“He’s a teenager,” Logan said, “He’s rebelling.”

“Maybe so!” Patton laughed, and it dwindled down to something that was easier felt in the air than definable in terms Logan was familiar with, “Gosh, I love him so much, Lo. My baby! He’s growing up so fast now! The other day he told me he had a boyfriend. He’s at that stage where he doesn’t want me to help him anymore!”

And despite the buffoon having not had a single drop of alcohol, Patton was tearing up. Logan gritted his teeth at the implications of a weepy, teary, so-full-of-emotions Patton. He had spent enough time in college trying to console him as he figured out the whole “Why does it always have to be about sex? Why can’t I just love hugging someone, Lo? Why does everyone make me feel so broken?” Logan hadn’t been any good back then, and he definitely hadn’t gotten better with time.

After that disaster with the last guy, Logan had decided that feeling things, frivolous things, emotion-like things, were not something he was into anymore.

Logan learned from his mistakes, after all.

Even the mistakes that started with “R” and ended in a $400 ring being thrown away.

“Is that why you’re here, Mr. Hart?” Logan asked, in that way of his that told even Patton with his squirrel run brain that it wasn’t actually a question at all. “You can’t baby your son anymore so you’ve moved on to the next best thing?”

Patton stuck his tongue in his cheek and set his water back down. “Patton.” He stressed. “And I’m not here to baby you, Logan. I’m here to be your friend.”

He said “friend” like it was a word in the dictionary Logan didn’t know. It was infuriating: the insinuation that Logan had never cracked open a dictionary before, that he was so unknowledgeable about the concept of a friend that Patton was about to show him the online Oxford dictionary definition, like someone who played dumb all day and peppered his windows with sticky notes in the shape of a game of Frogger knew more about something than Logan who had clawed his way up from nothing and was constantly needing to prove how he earned his position.

Patton nudged the second water in Logan’s direction.

Logan stared at it, at the condensation on the glass, at the ice cubes, at the refraction of the low lights from the bar counter. He stared at it like it was a portal back through time that would allow him to slam some sense into poor, pitiful twenty-one-years-old Logan before he let himself fall in Love.

Before he bought a ring or stopped taking days off unless Patton tromped down to his office himself. Before Remus Prince borrowed his cup and before Logan got it in his head that he was serving revenge rather than idiocracy. Before he let himself think too little and say too much and hurt a kid that had never deserved to be upset before in his life.

“If my son wants to be called Janus, I’ll call him that,” Patton says softly. “Because even if it doesn’t make sense to me, it means something to him. And even if my friend is struggling with emotions that don’t make sense to me, I’m still gonna try to help him, Lo.”

Patton ducked his head just a little, just enough that he managed to catch Logan’s strategically averted gaze and make something out of it: a swell of guilt, a sense of hope, a pinch of safety and unadulterated kindness.

His throat was dry, but it was the type of dry that couldn’t be fixed with a glass of water.

“I made a kid cry,” Logan said, because self loathing is a coat he had thought he’d outgrown but he can still fit his arms in the sleeves.

Patton nodded. “Yeah, I heard about that.” He sipped his water. “I think we all have at one point or another.”

“See, the distinct difference that you are missing here, Patton, is that you are a father.” Logan snapped, “And your son will cry at the drop of a hat if he thinks he can get something out of it. And you would never harm a child! Not for any reason in the entire world!”

“And you would?”

“I did.” Logan felt himself sink into the chair, sink like an anchor in the ocean, sink like the floor below him had turned into a blackhole. “I did, I did it. What type of person does that make me?”

“I hate to break it to you, Lo,” Patton said, as kindly as he could, which Logan knew was truly, sickenly nice. He wanted to choke on the sentiment but he found that he couldn’t quite make his chest hurt the way he wanted it too when it came to Patton’s pity.

“But that just means you’re a normal person.” Patton smiled dumbly, tilting his head and shrugging. “Everyone says things they don’t mean sometimes.”

“You don’t.”

“I do,” Patton countered gently, “Like when I hired Beatrice before realizing that she had lied about knowing how to use Excel.”

“Fuck, Beatrice,” Logan agreed, because if he closed his eyes too hard he thought he might still see grid patterns as much as he might see Virgil’s hurt expression and he hated it so much. So much.

“I also told-- Janus once that I would get him anything he wanted for his birthday, and he asked for a snake.” Patton shuddered, almost comically, “And you saw how that turned out.”

“I’ve always been impressed with his ability to sneak things into the school buildings,” Logan sighed. “I doubt anyone has ever forgotten that Show-and-Tell.”

Patton chuckled quietly. It was almost lost in the buzz of the other patrons in the bar. He drew a smiley face in the condensation on his glass and Logan reached over to wipe it away, like he had done a hundred seventeen times since college.

“So….Lasagna?” Patton offered. “We can make some garlic bread too.”

“I regret ever meeting you,” Logan said, even as he picked up the keys on the counter between them. He wished that Patton didn’t look so self satisfied, so pleased, so smug when the words tumbled from his lips, but Patton had never been one to pertain to the wishes and whims of Logan like that.

Settling his tab was quick; a pile of bills from his wallet that he didn’t actually check, but decided the bartender deserved anyway and then Patton linked their elbows together so that Logan couldn’t walk off the way that he used to when he would agree with Patton just to get him to shut up. Logan snagged Patton’s glasses from his head and fogged them up with his breath, before taking on the tedious task of cleaning the fingerprints off the lens meticulously while walking in a wobbling straight line.

Patton laughed like silver bells and it alone brightened the entire street with a type of magic that Logan had long since given up on trying to scientifically explain. The poet in him that Logan had buried under Calculus classes and Statistics courses and a Business degree and only let out when the alcohol out weighed the blood in his system, whispered that it was because it was Patton and his aloofness, and his kindness, and his generosity that never made any sense, and wasn’t that reason enough for the universe to lighten up?

It was drizzling outside, scattered raindrops and dark heavy clouds that whispered of a thunderstorm later. Patton skipped, Logan rolled his eyes and let himself be dragged towards the familiar pale blue punch buggy. It was the same exact car from their college time together, if one ignored the frankenstein replacements of just about every single component in it. Patton clung to the car the same way he had clung to the delusion of Logan being a good friend; sticking close through every breakdown, excusing every letdown, and spending far too much money on it when economically it would have been more beneficial to just let them go.

A wave of self loathing wrapped over Logan again when he pulled on the car door. Patton was genuinely a good person, a good friend. He was stupid at times and he made decisions that made Logan was to strangle him, but he cared so much more than other people. He offered fourth and fifth chances when Logan would have stone-walled his offender at one.

Not to mention, he had come out in the rain to find Logan specifically, probably traversing through three other bars to find the one that Logan had chosen to be his misery echo chamber.

By some sort of lucky happenstance, Logan had originally walked far enough to hail a taxi to get to this bar, leaving his car in the safety of the parking garage where Patton’s company paid a nice sum for security. Logan had tried to argue about that expense with him back in the day, but Patton had pulled out a picture of his toothy grinning son-- Janus-- and said “Lo!! What if my son comes to visit when he learns to drive?! I don’t want to worry about him getting attacked in the parking garage!”

Logan had brutally pointed out that his son would never visit him during work, and so far he had been correct in that assessment, but that didn’t stop him from feeling the slightest bit guilty about his bluntness even so much time later.

Patton had always looked for the best in people, had more strength than most of humanity, had more hope in happy endings that Logan had trust in fact and numbers.

“Is your son okay with me calling him Janus? I’m unsure of etiquette on this. Should I wait until he tells me his preference or should I just make the switch and not bring it up to him?” Logan asked with a sigh as Patton pulled out of the parking spot and set them towards Patton’s house on the other side of town. Unobstructed and following the driving laws, it would only take them about fifteen minutes, and yet Logan wondered about the possibility of Patton having Advil in the car.

The back of his head was already aching from the days events: banging his head on the keyboard all morning leading up to his disastrous lunch date, Remus, Virgil, squinting at spreadsheets until he couldn’t make out the numbers anymore, and the of course stumbling his way to the bar and dealing with Patton.

Patton giggled. “Oh yeah! I asked him earlier if it was okay to tell you. He said he wanted you to call him Janus now. He also said to tell you, you can take a hike.”

Knowing Janus, it was probably something more volatile than “taking a hike”. Most likely it had been something that might have required him to put a full five dollars in the swear jar that they kept on the counter next to the cookie jar. Not that it would matter much. Logan had stayed over at their house dozens of times and every single time he had come across Janus taking that money back out of that swear jar.

As far as Logan was aware, the swear jar had never actually been full. Patton must have noticed at some point-- probably that very first time Janus had taken the money back out-- but he was irritating insistent that he play dumb about it. Thus, Janus continued to swear in excess, Patton continued to make him put money in a swear jar for no real reason, and Logan continued to never understand either of them.

The radio in Patton’s car had been broken fifteen times since Patton had gotten it, but Logan assumed from the silence of the drive that it was now sixteen. He rested his elbow on the window and watched the drizzle turn into a steady rain and the windshield wipers flutter across their vision to occasionally bring them clarity.

The night life was somewhat dreary. The driving pace was slow, and they hit every single stop light in the city because that was just Logan’s luck. There were a few people running around in the rain: a family with a small child who was jumping in every slowly forming puddle on the sidewalk, a couple sharing an umbrella walking so close together they appeared as if to be one misshapen form, a group of friends chatting outside a 24 hour dinner in raincoats, and a few smokers huddled under an alcove with embers burning just enough for Logan to make out their forms through the downpour.

Logan realized almost immediately that the pit in his stomach was much more bearable if he instead focused on the raindrops on the window that are much easier to look at, much less representing something that Logan had always expected he might one day have, much less accusatory in wondering what is wrong with him that he can’t act like a normal human being, this isn’t working, who wants to marry a robot like you--

That was the reason why he wasn’t expecting the sudden jerk of the car coming to a hard stop at a yellow light that they absolutely could have made.

“PATTON!” Logan yelled.

The car behind them blared it’s horn and Logan rubbed his neck and reset his glasses from the sudden movement, ready to question what exactly Patton thought he was doing, because truly of all the things Logan was not in the mood for, this was one of them.

Except that before Logan could get any words out, Patton had put the car in park and whipped off his seatbelt to kick open his door. A wave of rain came pouring into the car as the man threw himself from the driver's seat like there was something wrong with the car, and for a second Logan entertained the absurd idea that they were going to blow up.

Which truly, would have just been a fitting end to his horrific day.

“Patton!” Logan hissed, grabbing after the other’s coat to pull him back inside before the rain soaked into the seats. “Get back in th--”

The other man ignored him, frantically waving to someone in the rain. “REMUS!! MR. PRINCE!! OVER HERE!!”

If Logan knew slightly less about human biology he might have been inclined to say that his heart jumped straight to his throat and climbed its way up his esophagus to strangle him. He wouldn’t have recognized the figure on the street corner on his own: Remus Prince was wearing a black leather jacket and jeans with holes in the knees. He was soaked to the bone, without an umbrella, and his usual bouncy brown curls were matted to his head, as if he had been walking out in the rain for much longer than the rain had been sweeping through the city.

He was standing with the smokers under their minimal tarp, although he, himself, was without a cigarette at all. When he turned at the call of his name, there was only confusion and exhaustion in his face. None of the smugness, or the ego, or the energy that he usually had.

Logan didn’t know why that bothered him. He was hurting from earlier; that was good.

After all, it was Remus’s ridiculous game that he had dragged everyone else into.

((Logan’s finger itched and he dug his nails into his skin so deeply he was afraid to glance down in case there was blood pouring off hands.))

Remus ventured out to meet them, dodging across the lanes of traffic without a care in the world, or perhaps with a death wish. Remus didn’t seem particularly like he would mind getting run over by the way that he opened the back door, climbed in, and shook the excess water out in the interior of the car like some type of undomesticated dog.

“Is this a kidnapping?” He asked, rain dripping down his face. “A murder? Do I get to know your name before you dismember me, cutie?”

Patton laughed joyfully, even as Logan felt his face screw up at the sound of Remus calling their boss “cutie”. It was beyond unprofessional, even if Remus was apparently unaware that his career hinged entirely on not insulting Patton. It took a lot to make Patton angry enough to fire someone-- his patience was the best and worst thing about him, as Logan had been reminded every time they interacted-- but once Remus crossed that line, not even a cockroach like him would be able to drag himself out of the metaphorical wasteland Patton would make out of his life.

Cutie, honestly. Who calls anyone they’ve just met cutie. Logan could understand Remus having called him Lovebug and Lolo, but cutie?

For Patton?

Patton climbed back into the car, snapping on his seatbelt and managed to get out of park at the very same moment as the light turned green. He wiped his sleeve along his glasses, and brightly said, “I’m Patton! And you already know Logie here!”

“Logie?” Remus repeated, sitting back against the seat taking in Logan for the first time. “Oh shi--”

“Do not call me that,” Logan said. “Patton, you can drop me off at the next corner. I will walk home.”

“Don’t be silly!” Patton said, in the same tone that he had used during their college days to coax Logan into driving him to the nearest grocery store after he had successfully managed to pull two all nighters in a row. Logan hated that tone, and Patton knew that well.

“If you do not stop the car, I will throw myself from it while it is still moving.”

“I can get out, actually!” Remus said far too loud for the small car. Logan resisted the urge to turn around and scowl at him. Surely, his pea-sized brain had managed to figure out that he was the point of contention here and that his best move would be to shut up, so why had he decided to open his mouth? “I need to get home anyway. Big day tomorrow and everything.”

“Oh?” Patton said delightedly because Logan would not ever play into subject changes willingly. “What’s tomorrow?”

“I’m getting fired,” Remus said with a nonchalant shrug.

Patton blinked for a moment-- his squirrel-run brain jamming at the sudden twist of the words because whatever he was expecting from his visitor it was not that. Logan resisted the urge to reach over and give him a shake at the shoulders: of course he wouldn’t be able to expect anything with Remus Prince. The man was insufferable and illogical and he wrought chaos for fun.

With everything that had happened, did Patton really think that there was an exaggeration in there?

Remus wanted attention. And he said whatever he needed to in order to get it: a fake affair, a fake divorce, a fake child-- Of course he would say he was getting fired tomorrow if it got Patton to have to use all of his meager brain cells to figure out how serious he was.

“Is that something to celebrate, Mr. Prince?” Logan cut in coldly. “Getting fired?”

“And here I thought that you would be happy, Ackroyd,” Remus said. “Unless you think you’re going to miss me.”

“If only I would be so lucky,” Logan said, digging his phone from his pocket, and turning it back on. The screen was blindingly bright and Logan’s eyes ached just glancing at it in the corner of his vision. “Patton, pull over. I am not doing this tonight. Or tomorrow. Or ever again.”

“I’m not going to let you walk home after however many rum and cokes you had, Logan.”

“Patton,” Logan snarled. “If you continue to treat me like you treat your son, I will tender my resignation tonight. Pull over now.”

Patton opened his mouth, but whatever he was going to say was swallowed up in Remus’s empty voice speaking.

“You went drinking?”

“Do not talk to me, Mr. Prince.”

“You’re not even yelling.”

Logan wasn’t sure what that was supposed to mean, which may have irritated him more than the fact that he was so insistent about continuing to talk when Logan was liable to push the car to crash and kill all three of them. Remus was already staring at him, his expression dark and serious in the passing car lights and somehow Logan thought that he looked vulnerable.

Logan gritted his teeth as his headache pulsed behind his eyes.

“Shut up,” he said. “And put on your seat belt.”

“Or what? You’ll divorce me?” Remus pushed forward between the seats until he was just a few inches from Logan’s own face, grinning with all his teeth. It was at once the same smile that Logan had catalogued through every week of working with him and also something completely foreign.

Remus had pulled him into a kiss earlier that morning, and Logan remembered the taste of pickles on his lips just as well as the smirk he kept as Logan walked away. But this expression is somehow inverted, somehow shifted, somehow a weapon more than a challenge.

“Boys,” Patton said. “Please don’t fight in my car!”

“If you did not want us to fight, why did you invite him in this car?” Logan asked. “You, of all people, know my opinions on--”

“Logan, you’re drunk.”

“What does that have to do with this?!” Logan bit out. He glared at his phone: there were three missed calls from Patton and a handful of text messages from him that Logan couldn’t actually read in the combination of the bright phone light and darkness around them. His eyes were blurry even with his glasses on and the frustration of not being able to read only heightened as he made out the notification for his email which meant that Beatrice had managed to finish her work (allowing Logan to be able to go fix it) or that news of him yelling at a child made it around the office and now he was going to harassed by them as well.

All because of Remus Prince’s inability to shut up.

Patton threw a hand out and grabbed Logan’s phone from his hand and carelessly tossed it over both their shoulders to Remus.

“Patton!” Logan hissed, rubbing the irritated tears from his eyes. “Remus, give it back!”

Remus, however, was just staring at the phone in his lap like it was some type of bomb. Logan’s phone locked itself and the screen went dark, and still Remus sat inhumanely still in the seat, staring at it, with a type of blank expression that Logan oftentimes related to their coworkers when Logan asked them to perform any sort of math without a calculator.

“Remus,” Logan said again.

Remus jerked at the sound of his voice, snapping out of whatever fit the phone had put him in almost meekly-- if Logan could describe anything Remus did as meekly without it being a blatant falsehood. “Meekly” itself had never seemed to be a word in Remus’s vocabulary which was another irritating fact about him that made Logan break out in figurative hives.

Logan knew how Remus was.

He knew Remus.

It didn’t matter that he had never talked to Remus before today, that his thinly veiled contempt for his coworkers kept him from being willing to stand in their presence more than he was being paid to, that this fake affair was the first stupid relationship of any kind he had gotten outside of Patton and his son since his last boyfriend had dumped him on the night he was going to propose and hadn’t he thought he’d known him too? Isn’t that what led to all this?

It didn’t matter.

Logan was smarter, now. Logan was better now. Logan was--

“I don’t…” Remus said, trailing off as he stared at the messages popping up on Logan’s phone and Logan wondered why it felt like his lungs had shrunk right in his chest. “I don’t think you should be reading these right now.”

“He definitely should not!” Patton said, with a very convincing amount of forced happiness. “Hold that for him will you, Remus? Oh and why do you think you’re going to get fired tomorrow?”

Remus looked up at Logan and then at Patton and then back at Logan, like Logan was supposed to know what that meant in addition to every other stupid look he’d given Logan all evening. Logan shoved his glasses up to his hairline and rubbed his aching eyes, and yet somehow that still didn’t fix the pounding in his head or the exhaustion hollowing out his bones. It also didn’t make Remus disappear from the backseat, which was equally annoying, even though Logan hadn’t truly thought he was a shared apparition for him and Patton.

“You didn’t mention anything about today to your… what are you a fuck buddy?” Remus said.

And Patton laughed.

Logan grabbed the door handle and yanked on it, but of course the ridiculous safety locks were engaged, and Logan had spent far too many sober years getting locked in this car to try to puzzle out the broken locking system in order to drunkenly throw himself out of the car. He was not in the habit of wishing for miracles, or even believing in deities, but he imagined that some powerful entity was finding ruining Logan’s life to be semi enjoyable.

“See this is why I can’t fire him!” Patton said through giggles and Logan thought maybe he was being addressed for this. Patton met Remus’s gaze through the rearview mirror and shook the last bit of water from his damp hair. “You make everything so entertaining!”

“What?”

Logan grit his teeth and yanked on the door handle again. “Remus, meet Mr. Hart, the CEO and your boss. Also put on your seatbelt.”

Remus blinked at them both, leaning between the seats and definitely not putting on his seatbelt. Logan counted backward from ten, reminding himself that one of the hiring requirements for Patton’s company has always been must be the stupid beyond belief. He’d known for a while that his coworkers were idiots on a good day, hazards to his health on bad ones, and yet somehow in the whirlwind of the day he’s had, Logan had forgotten that Remus counted as a coworker still.

“I’m not… getting fired?” Remus said, acting much like a computer after being turned on. “Why do you know my name then?”

Patton shrugged, flicking on his blinker to change lanes before the next light. “You have interesting ideas for your advertising strategy! Of course I would know your name! I’m sorry about vetoing that last one. I know Logan liked it, but I wanted to stick to the family-as-a-whole angle.”

“Patton,” Logan warned with an edge.

“Logan liked…?” Remus echoed, before turning towards Logan with a look of bewilderment that annoyed Logan far more than it had any right to. “You actually look at my shit?”

“Put on your seatbelt, Remus,” he said, because wasn’t it obvious that Logan looked at his things? Before the whole Robot incident Logan hadn’t had a problem with Remus at all: he was effective and efficient and the rumors were irritating but below him to indulge in. Before Remus had dragged him figuratively kicking and screaming into this mess, Logan approved the budgets that came with the projects Remus created.

He still did that, just with more anger than before. Petty feelings for Remus himself aside, his work was objectively good.

Logan knew that about him.

“So!” Patton said over both of them, with his signature grin that Logan suspected he would still be wearing even if Logan decided to kill him right now. It must be the by-product of being controlled by rodents running on a wheel. “How was your volunteer work Remus?”

Remus froze in the back seat, going unnaturally still again. “Are you some kind of stalker-- uh sir?”

“Will you knock that off?” Logan snapped, which only made Remus’s shoulders jump straight to his ears. “And put on your seatbelt.”

“Just curious!” Patton said, ignoring Logan entirely. “Darlene is a good friend of mine! I make sure to send monthly donations to the organization since I don’t have a lot of free time to jump over and help.”

Remus didn’t say anything to that. He swallowed audibly and leaned back against the seat, dragging fingers through his wet hair and then tucked his arms in his own armpits. Logan pressed a palm to his forehead watching the street lights bend from behind his eyelids because that was easier than staring at Remus act like Patton was trying to pull his teeth out.

“You actually do volunteer work?” Logan said. “You don’t seem like the type.”

“Ha,” Remus said without any inflection. Logan thought that was the quietest that he had ever been. Where was that stupid ass smirk? Where was the stubbornness that pushed back against everything? Where was that loud voice and that confidence?

“Put on your seatbelt,” Logan said again.

“Why do you care if I wear the belt or not?”

“Remus put on your seatbelt or, so help me Newton, I will climb back there and put it on for you, myself!”

The air simmered from the acid in his tone, making the silence figurative chafe against his ribs. Remus stared at him, blinking slowly, with the street lights casting roving shadows on his face. His dark eyes were just so-- so--

Logan dug his nails into his palm. Why was it Remus Prince could make him feel like this? What gave him the right?

“It’s okay!” Patton said, setting the car to park. “We’re here anyway!”

Logan reached up and pulled his glasses back onto his face properly, but it still took him a moment to realize that they were near a bunch of townhouses, double parked outside one that Logan had considered moving into all those years ago when he had first been looking for an apartment for after college.

Remus too, apparently needed a moment to recognize the area. “We… are at my apartment? Holy shit, you are a stalker.”

Patton giggled, flashing Remus with his blinding smile and reached back to pick up Logan’s phone from his hands. “Thank you so much, kiddo! We’ll wait until you get inside all safe and sound, and I’ll see you tomorrow!”

“You will not,” Logan said. “Tomorrow you have a business deal two hours away to complete and if you miss it--”

Patton stretched back in his seat and let out a hugely exaggerated yawn. “But they’re so boring! Maybe I should bring Janus with me. He always makes my business deals entertaining. I love when he sets his snake on people. He looks so happy and he laughs and--”

Logan squeezed his eyes closed and recited the first twenty digits of pi in his head to keep from grabbing Patton’s squirrel run brain and slamming it into the steering wheel.

“Homicide is wrong,” Logan said.

“I’ll help you vouch for insanity,” Remus said. “I mean, tied together through a murder, and possibly hiding a body is much more juicy than a fake marriage that’s falling apart. We’d be the talk of the office.”

“They would not find any body that I hid,” Logan said. “Nobody would.”

Remus opened his mouth to say something more, but whatever it is he decided against it. Instead he slid over the seats and kicked open the door right behind Logan and stepped out into the night air.

“Thanks for the ride, Mr. Hart, sir,” he said, strangely formal, then squinted and added, “Daddy?”

“I’m not firing you, Remus,” Patton said. “No matter what you call me!”

Logan ran his tongue over his teeth counting each and every one. Remus looked at him but ultimately finally adhered to that whole shutting up thing. He closed the door to Patton’s blue punch buggy and started towards the door to the apartments.

“Oh,” Remus said, and turned back at the last second. He knocked his knuckles on Logan’s window a few inches from where Logan’s gaze fixed itself on a light. Patton apparently knew more about what to do than Logan because he pressed the window lowering button and Remus reached his entire arm into the window to drop a small object right into Logan’s lap.

Logan caught it mainly due to reaction rather than skill and his skin tingled at the familiar item. Even in the dark, Logan’s fingers roll over the shape of the ring that had always reminded him of the worst day of his life. It was still warm from being in Remus’s pocket.

“I think that should stay with you,” Remus said, like it wasn’t a big deal at all. “You know… for the next boytoy you take to your sex dungeon or whatever nerds like you do on weekends.”

And then he turned around and fled towards the apartment building. Patton turned off the hazard lights and slipped back into traffic and Logan wondered if he would be polite enough to not comment if Logan started crying right then and there.

His throat felt swollen, his tongue too big for his mouth, and the headache thrummmmmmed painfully.

Logan knew Remus Prince.

“You know that Remus Prince isn’t gonna be like him,” Patton said to fill the silence.

“Remus Prince isn’t like anyone.” Logan didn’t whine. To whine would be unbecoming. And childish. And embarrassing.

So Logan didn’t whine and Patton mercifully didn't call him out on his not-whining.

And neither of them mention the choked tone that Logan had for the rest of the night.

When Logan had seen his boss after he made Virgil cry, he hadn’t expected it to end up with him clutching that ring like a lifeline, but as he ran his fingers around the rim, he wondered if it had fit on Remus’s finger at all.

(Part Five)

#intrulogical #sanders sides #logan sanders #remus sanders #patton sanders #Far too many OCs gross #Rumor Mill Au #rumors #well fake marriage #sympathetic remus #Logan is bad at feelings #so bad #now with more logan angst #Patton is a good friend #This au is so old that I called Janus Dante and I decided to fix that #alcohol #drunk logan

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obviouslygenuinely · 3 years

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Free Resources For Writers & Creators

This is a quick post of free resources that may help fandom creators (or creators in general). I’m sure many of these have been shared before. However, it doesn’t hurt to spread the word. A few quick points:

As a professional writer, I think this post will cater mostly towards writers.

I’m also a freelance photographer, so digital photography/editing/art sources are included, too.

I chose not to use any affiliate links in my post. I don’t want to profit from this, and I’m not sure that’s allowed on Tumblr anyways.

If I’ve listed a resource I haven’t used myself, I’ve made sure to state it.

Masterlists and/or huge resource compilations are marked with asterisks.

Alright, here we go! I hope you all find this post helpful. Happy writing/creating!

Research

All of these are free resources for research. I use most of them for my writing jobs because they are extremely credible. These are great for making accurate references in your fics/creations.

1. ***Research Resources For Writers***

Writer’s Write has an enormous database of research resources for writers. They are divided into 20+ categories such as:

careers

historical research

crimes and forensics

religion

Each category contains 10+ resources like websites, articles, tips, databases, and so much more. It’s the most comprehensive and organized free research tool I use.

2. PubMed

My go-to source for citing medical studies. You’ll find 30 million citations related to numerous physical and mental health issues.

3. BioMed Central

I don’t use this website as often, but I keep it in my bookmarks. It’s similar to PubMed - great for discovering current and former medical research.

4. Drugs.com

If you need to name a medication and/or refer to medication side effects, Drugs.com is a straightforward resource. It’s easy to navigate and understand.

It also has a tool that lists potential medication interactions. This is really useful for accurate descriptions of med combinations.

5. Merck Manuals Consumer Version

Merck Manuals started out in 1899 as a medical reference guide for professionals. This consumer version is really comprehensive and updated regularly. It includes definitions, studies, and more.

6. FindLaw

If you’re writing about legal topics, FindLaw is useful for learning about laws/procedures in reader-friendly language. Categories include:

accidents/injuries

criminal law

family law (divorce, custody, etc.)

Keep in mind that laws vary based on location! You’ll often find additional links to state-related laws within articles. I do recommend double-checking state/location-based legal resources for accuracy.

7. APA Dictionary of Psychology

This psychology dictionary is provided by the American Psychological Association. It covers 90+ areas of psychology and 25,000+ terms/definitions.

You’ll also find links to additional psychology databases, resources, and so on. The website is updated frequently to provide updated information.

8. U.S. Bureau Of Labor Statistics

If you’re writing about a character’s job/career in the United States, this is a great source for accuracy. For any job sector, you’ll find details about

education requirements

positions in the sector

average salary for positions

what the positions entail

I imagine there are alternatives for other countries, too!

9. Investopedia Financial Term Dictionary

My area of expertise is personal finance; all of my writing published under my name is in this niche. I still refer to Investopedia’s dictionary for help. It’s excellent for understanding/explaining financial terms in a way that your reader can understand.

10. MedTerms Medical Dictionary

This is the medical version of Investopedia’s dictionary. I use this source less frequently, but I find that it’s accurate and helpful. There are many similar references online if you search for “medical glossaries” or “medical dictionaries”.

11. Domain Authority Checker

I’m not sure if this one is too helpful for fic writers, but it’s one of my most used tools. Domain authority “a search engine ranking score developed by Moz that predicts how likely a website is to rank on search engine result pages (SERPs)”.

The Wikipedia page for domain authority (DA) explains it clearly and simply. To sum it up, websites with good DA scores are considered reliable and accurate. If I cite sources in my work. I always link to sources with good DA scores.

Writing/Editing

This section is the most thorough one. All of these are completely free tools for writing and editing any type of content. I currently use or have used all of these at some point in my career.

1. ***List Of Free And Open-Source Software Packages***

This Wikipedia page applies to multiple categories in my post. It’s a masterpost of free and open-source software for anything and everything. Software is divided up into categories and sub-categories. Some relevant examples include:

media

networking/Internet

image editing

file management

There are hundreds of free software links on the page, so you’ll need to do a bit of browsing. Start with the categories above to find software geared towards writers/creators.

2. OpenOffice

This is a free alternative to Microsoft Office. I’ve used it for nine years and love it. OpenOffice software includes free applications for:

text documents

spreadsheets

presentations

drawing

templates

There are many more tools with OpenOffice that I haven’t used. If you write offline, I cannot recommend it enough. Tutorials are readily available online, and the software is pretty user-friendly.

3. Evernote

I briefly used Evernote and found that it’s very user-friendly and helpful. Most of my colleagues use Evernote and recommend it for taking notes/staying organized.

(I’m personally not a fan of note-taking software or apps. My method is messy text documents with bullet point lists.)

4. Google Drive

This might seem like an obvious one, but Google Drive/Docs is my writing haven. It has the tools included with Microsoft Office and OpenOffice and then some. It’s great for collaborative writing/sharing documents, too.

5. Grammarly

I use the Premium (paid) version of Grammarly, but I also used the free version for years. It’s helpful for detecting simple spelling, style, and grammatical errors.

There are numerous ways to use it - desktop, copy/paste documents, and so on. I’m not a huge fan of how well it works with Google Docs, but they’re improving it/it’s moved out of beta mode.

If you’re interested in the paid version - which I highly recommend - wait to buy until a holiday pops up. They offer a major discount on the software for almost every holiday/special occasion.

6. Plagiarism Detector

This website is handy for scanning for plagiarism. You can scan your own work to ensure uniqueness, too. My clients are big fans of this tool.

(I no longer use this resource; I use a paid tool called Copyscape Premium. The low cost has a big return on investment for me.)

7. TitleCase

The name says it all. It’s free and simple! I’ll be honest - I’m terrible with proper title case. You’d think after a decade of writing I’d nail it. However, I use this tool pretty often.

8. Hemingway Editor

Hemingway Editor is an online and desktop editor. It’s excellent for scanning your writing to check for:

readability (a grade-level score is listed)

adverb usage

passive voice usage

complex phrase usage

estimated reading time

This tool is color-coded to make editing easy. For example, adverbs are highlighted in blue. I don’t use this as often as I used to, but it was essential for my early writing career.

9. Polish My Writing

This tool is very straightforward. You paste your writing into the text box. Spelling errors, grammar suggestions, and style suggestions are highlighted in red, blue, and green.

It’s great for double-checking your work alongside Grammarly or Hemingway. When using free editors, I recommend using at least two for higher accuracy.

10. OneLook Reverse Dictionary And Thesaurus

I’m going to use the definition directly from the website:

“This tool lets you describe a concept and get back a list of words and phrases related to that concept. Your description can be anything at all: a single word, a few words, or even a whole sentence. Type in your description and hit Enter (or select a word that shows up in the autocomplete preview) to see the related words.”

To put it simply, you can use the reverse dictionary/thesaurus to find those words/thoughts that are on the tip of your tongue. Use the tool to:

find a word based on the word’s definition (i.e. search for “inability to feel pain”)

find synonyms and related concepts

generate a list of category-specific words (i.e. search for “cat breeds”)

answer basic questions (i.e. search for “what is the capital of France?”)

The results can be hit or miss, but I usually find the information I’m looking for. It’s a solid resource any writer regardless of genre.

11. Word Frequency Counter + Phrase Frequency Counter

I cannot emphasize how much I love these tools. Repetition is the bane of a writer’s existence; it’s simply inevitable at times.

These two tools count the number of times you use a single word or phrase in a text document. Just copy/paste your document, hit submit, and you’re all set!

For the phrase frequency counter, you can scan for two-word to ten-word phrases.

12. Thesaurus.com

This is another tool that might seem painfully obvious. Combined with the word frequency counter, it’s such an essential resource for me.

It’s especially useful if you’re writing about the same topic multiple times (i.e. love, getting drunk, sex, etc.). I always use this combo of tools to ensure uniqueness.

13. Lists Of Colors

Are you stumped when trying to come up with unique shades of blue? Is describing your character’s hair or skin color difficult? This Wikipedia page has you covered. It contains:

lists of colors (alphabetically)

lists of colors by shade

lists of Crayola crayon colors

lists of color palettes

I typically use this resource for product descriptions, but I also used it for creative writing many times. It’s a lifesaver for all things color-related.

Free Photos/Images

Tons of creators need free photos/images for numerous reasons. All of these sources provide 100% free photos, illustrations, etc. that have a Creative Commons Zero (CC0) license. This means there’s no copyright whatsoever on them.

You can edit the images however you’d like, too. All of the images in my post are from the first source listed below. I made them black and white and added text.

(A lot of these sites have donate buttons for contributors. Donating a dollar here and there goes a long way!)

1. Unsplash

Unsplash is my personal favorite for high-resolution photos. It’s easy to navigate and has over 2,000,000 free images. Downloading an image is a one-click process, and you don’t need to create an account.

2. Pixabay

Pixabay is my go-to site for illustrations and vector graphics (they have photos, too). There are 1.9 million free images to choose from. You don’t need an account to download images, but I recommend creating one. It’s free and with an account:

you don’t have to complete a CAPTCHA every time you download an image

you can access higher-quality/larger/etc. versions of images

I often use graphics from Pixabay to create overlays and masks for mixed media art pieces.

3. PxHere

I’ve never used PxHere, but one of my writing clients recommends it. It seems very similar to Pixabay, and the interface is user-friendly.

4. Pexels

In my limited experience, Pexels seems to focus on “artsy” stock images/content. I found great high-quality images the few times I’ve used it.

5. Burst by Shopify

I haven’t used Burst, but it’s another free image site that a writing client recommended to me. It seems a little limited compared to the other sites, but it never hurts to add it to your toolbox!

Digital Art/Photo Editing/Etc.

This section seems brief, but the tools listed are pretty comprehensive and diverse. They are geared towards many creative needs/projects like:

Creating manips of people/etc.

Adding text to images.

Creating collages.

Digital illustration.

Advanced photo editing.

There’s something for everyone. In my experience, finding your favorites among these will take some trial and error.

1. Pixlr X and Pixlr E (app available)

Pixlr X and Pixlr E are both versatile free editing tools. Pixlr X is ideal for less experienced creators. Pixlr E is comparable to Adobe PhotoShop.

I’ve used both software formats for personal and professional art projects.

The Pixlr app is handy for making collages, adding filters/overlays, adding text, and so on. I’ve used it for creating fanfiction collages and similar projects. It’s super easy to use.

2. Remove Background by Pixlr

This is one of the easiest/fastest tools I’ve found for removing backgrounds from images. It’s perfect for creators who make manips using photos of people.

It takes literal seconds to use. The tool automatically removes the background. If you spot any mistakes, you can refine the results with brush/erase tools. Then you download the cutout and you’re all set!

Unfortunately, this feature isn’t available on the Pixlr app. There are a lot of smartphone apps for removing photo backgrounds.

3. GIMP

If you need a full-fledged Photoshop alternative, GIMP is excellent software. It’s not an online tool like most I’ve suggested; you’ll need to download it to your computer.

There’s quite a learning curve for it, unless you’re familiar with Photoshop already. Fortunately, the free video/text GIMP tutorials online are endless. I no longer use/need GIMP, but it’s a personal favorite of mine.

4. Paint.NET

Admittedly, I haven’t used Paint.NET, but my art/photography colleagues commonly mention it. It’s comparable to Photoshop and GIMP. It’s a web-based tool, and a quick Google search returns several tutorials for it.

5. Photopea

This is more or less a Photoshop clone, but it’s free and web-based. If you watch Photoshop tutorials, you can usually follow the same steps in PhotoPea.

I’ve only used it a few times; I have Photoshop so I don’t need it. Still, it’s very impressive - especially for a free tool.

6. PicsArt (app available)

PicsArt is a photo editing website and app; the app is much easier to use in my opinion. It’s a “fun” editing tool for photo manips, collages, and fan art in general. A lot of users post their art in the app, and I’ve noticed tons of cool fandom edits.

Some of the features are Premium (AKA cost money), but I don’t think they’re worth the extra cost. PicsArt also has a digital drawing app. I haven’t personally used it but it may be worth checking out!

7. Adobe Photoshop Express (app available)

(I’ll preface this by saying I have an Adobe subscription, so I have access to the “locked” features. I’ve used the free versions, but my memory of it is a bit hazy.)

Photoshop Express is a free web-based tool and smartphone app. The app is very user-friendly and can be used for detailed editing, adding filters, adding text, and so on.

I’m less familiar with the browser version; I only use it for the cutout tool when I’m feeling lazy. It seems to be a good fit for quick edits - filters, cropping, and so on.

8. Make PNG Transparent by Online PNG Tools

This tool is awesome for removing solid colored backgrounds. I use it to create graphics for mixed media art pieces. Here’s how it works:

upload an image

type the color your want to remove (name or hex code)

type the percentage of similar color tones you want to match (for example, 25% will remove your chosen color plus similar warm/cool tones)

the removed color is replaced with transparent pixels

If you want to make a JPG transparent, start with the website’s JPG to PNG Converter. There are a ton of useful free tools offered, but I haven’t tried out most of the others.

Wrap Up

That’s all I’ve got for now! If I think of additional free tools, I’ll add them to this post. Feel free to reblog with your own recommendations or message me if you’d like me to add anything.

I hope my fellow creatives find these too

#writer resources #writing #writblr #fanfiction #fanfic #creative writing #writing reference #writing resources #writer reference #obviouslygenuinely #creators #artists on tumblr #fandom #fan art

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robin-josephette-biden · 3 years

Text

A Statement Through Horror: BDG and YouTube

In his video announcing his departure from Polygon Bryan David Gilbert [BDG] stated, “I want to make things that one day people will make a show like unraveled about.” [Paraphrasing here]. Since that announcement he has made some of the most interesting and engaging comedy videos on the platform. On Bryan’s channel, there is a section called “bdg’s scaries” that contains three videos. The first how to make jorts was released April 27, 2019 and will not be part of this analysis, as we are focused on the other two videos. These two videos are Earn $20K EVERY MONTH by being your own boss which was released on October 25, 2020 (two months before his final Unraveled video and departure from Polygon) and Teaching Jake about the Camcorder, Jan '97 which was posted March 3, 2021. If you have not seen these videos yet you should stop reading immediately and go watch them both (honestly everything on his channel is amazing, especially the surprisingly compelling and personal Dances Moving! series) before continuing to read this as I will be spoiling both of them. The position of YouTube celebrity has been the source of a good bit of commentary as short form online media has become more and more central in our culture. Bryan has created two videos that I feel do an excellent job of exploring the relationship between youtuber and audience. I should also point out that this is merely my interpretation of these videos and is in no way BDG’s intended message. I’ll start by going over the first video. Earn $20K EVERY MONTH by being your own boss opens with BDG outside an apartment building, standing in front of a black car. BDG points up at one of the windows and says, “Three years ago I was living in that apartment right there. Third floor, leaky windows, cockroaches, the worst.” I do not know if the real life BDG actually lived in that building, but the 3 years timeframe does line up neatly with his beginning to work at Polygon. BDG continues to bad mouth his old apartment and mentions how he has turned it all around stating, “But just last week I paid off my very first Subaru Impreza. And I own my own house in Nebraska.” This radical change in life-style he credits to, “. . . [working] from home, [making] my own hours, and [being] my own boss. And you can do it too.” I think that it is interesting that BDG’s career up to that point mirrors that of his character, going from newly graduated content creator making small videos in his apartment to one of the most popular creators on Polygon. And all that being accomplished through work that many (rightly or wrongly) would not see as fitting into the mold of the traditional 9 to 5. The idea of making millions working from home, at your own pace, and with no boss is intrinsically tied to the mystique of the YouTube celebrity. Moving into BDG’s office he explains that he makes $20k a month working on spreadsheets. A massive spreadsheet appears behind him that is dated, 01.12.88 (nothing of note happened on January 12, 1988 and the only thing that happened on December 1, 1988 is a large cyclone that struck Bangladesh, January 12, 1888 is the day of the Schoolhouse Blizzard which struck the midwestern US and killed 235 people (remember this for later)) and is filled, seemingly randomly, with garbled nonsense symbols. Many of the cells are the same as other cells and there are empty cells scattered haphazardly throughout the spreadsheet. BDG explains that he got this strategy from Dorian Smiles. In exchange for working on these spreadsheets BDG receives $10k - $20k a month (an amount that lines up pretty damn well with the amount he should be getting through his Patreon page currently, I don’t know if this was true when the video was made though) from Dorian. Wanting to know where the money is coming from BDG asks his bank and they explain that he is wiring the money to himself from another account he has. He grows confused as to the nature of this work and the disproportionately large amount of money it brings in, explicitly mentioning his confusion as to how the money is coming from someone with, “. . . my name and my voice.” and sets about to find and confront Dorian Smiles. BDG sets off for Center Nebraska, which is close to where Dorian lives (a small town in the northeast corner of Nebraska). He states that Dorian’s address hasn’t existed since 1888 (that’s a familiar year isn’t it?) when it was supposedly condemned during an enormous blizzard and is, “. . . just woods now.” The video then transitions to BDG walking through dark woods while his narration talking up the Dorian Smiles program continues becoming increasingly broken. He comes across a figure sitting in the woods that is convulsing strangely, when he calls out to it the figure turns and is him (heretofore named Dorian). Dorian slowly puts his hands over his nose and mouth while staring at BDG at which point the narration cuts out. BDG copies Dorian and when Dorian removes his hands in a flourish, BDG does the same to reveal that he no longer has a mouth. The video quickly cuts back to BDG in his office talking about the program, he asks the viewer, “Why don’t you join me?” and then sits back and smiles while that line repeats without him moving his mouth. The most pressing mystery is who Dorian Smiles is. I think the most likely answer (and one I know I am not the progenitor of) is that Dorian is a reference to The Picture of Dorian Grey by Oscar Wilde, the story of a young man that has a portrait that ages and takes on the ravages of the debauched life its subject lives while Dorian himself does not. BDG would therefore be the unwitting recipient of that blessing, reaping massive rewards while his double, Dorian, lives in poverty and solitude. I like this explanation for Dorian, but I find it to be far more mechanical than thematic. On a metatextual level you could read that Dorian represents the character of BDG. The person that is in all of BDG’s videos, and the one with whom so much of the audience forms a parasocial relationship. In this lens the parallels with BDG’s own life make more sense. By this point in BDG’s career it is not difficult to imagine him feeling stifled creatively at work (I feel comfortable saying this given how soon after this video came out that he departed Polygon). His character had grown too large, potentially becoming alien to him, no longer reflecting the art he wanted to make and so he made a video about a distorted version of himself stealing his voice. In this way the video becomes a statement on his artistic integrity and his desire to test new boundaries and go in different directions. In hindsight, with the knowledge of his departure and then success after leaving Polygon, the video becomes almost heartwarming (if it weren’t terrifying) in the same way that a before and after picture of someone improving themselves can be. We will return to the Dorian Smiles system, but now we must move to the second video, Teaching Jake about the Camcorder, Jan '97. I’ll save you the blow by blow breakdown and aim for a quick summary instead. This video is a simple stationary shot of an old CRT tv. A VHS tape is inserted and a video of a man teaching his, evidently young, son how to use a camcorder plays. It is relatively wholesome and corny in that way that all home movies are and when it ends the tape rewinds and the segment plays again, this time with a few deviations. Over replays the father becomes aware of what is happening and begins trying to reason with Jake through the camcorder begging him to stop watching the tape and move on. The father is menaced by a large shadowy figure that does not speak or move when confronted. Eventually the father resorts to simply taking the camera and recording his own screams of pain. On the final rewind the father simply says, “Attaboy.” before calmly walking out the room and into the dark hallway, a doorway opens at the other end, filled with orange light, and the father walks through and down stairs. The final shot of the video is of the television, showing the hallway, as orange light begins to flicker in the background of the left side of the TV. The sound of the father descending the stairs transitions from the TV to diegetic and a shadow appears briefly in the light. On one level the video is clearly a statement about loss and about trauma. Jake is losing himself by watching these videos on repeat, trying in vain to relive a happier time. In that desperate desire to regain what was lost he is distorting it, making it into something it isn’t, hurting it. At the beginning the father says, “Never ever press the rewind button, otherwise you might record over a precious memory. We always keep the recording going forward . . .“ I think there is an additional, and more personal for BDG, reading however. The father is the modern character of BDG, and we, the audience, are Jake. He is pleading with us to leave the past behind and move on. This was only his 3rd video that he posted after leaving Polygon. It is a plea from him to leave the old character behind and stop trying to make one into the other. To stop obsessively comparing the new videos to the old. To let the future be the future and let the past be the past. He is telling us that his new work will not be like the old, that he has progressed past that and that now his viewers need to as well. The detachment and confusion of Earn $20K EVERY MONTH by being your own boss has transformed into a desire to move forward. But he needed to ensure that his audience was ready to come with him, and so he made a video about loss and the dangers of sinking too far into it. I know that there are some of you that feel I am reading too much of what I assume to be BDG’s thoughts and emotions into these interpretations, and I am the first to admit that I might be. In no way am I trying to say these are the only interpretations of these videos or even that they are correct. I think there is so much more of an artist that they put into their work than they realise. I do not know the mind of BDG, only he does, but these videos made me feel that I had a glimpse into the feelings of a man whose work I admire. These videos are either longer or a drastically different tone to the material he has put on his own channel and as such they stood out to me. They felt different, and they seemed to ask for a different level of scrutiny. On some level maybe BDGs videos can not be divorced from the story of BDG as a content creator, the same as any modern internet semi-celebrity, or indeed any artist. I guess there was also a part of me that wanted to answer the call to action I heard when BDG left Polygon, to unravel his work. I hope in some small way I’ve been able to do that.

#bdg #brian david gilbert #analysis #youtube #scary #When the dad screams towards the end of Teaching Jake I felt that in my soul.

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