#i have no idea what this is just a general thank you post positivity idk

[ssolessurvivor]

PSA: A Thank You

Guys, I have been very busy this past week and have had this in my head for a few days so I thought I'd let you know. I have easily 40+ drafts...that number is astonishing to me. An OC writer having that many drafts with some amazing writers? I never dreamed I'd have that much to write with my baby, and I have 35 of those in my folder currently that I am trying to add to the queue as quickly as I can whenever I have inspiration.

I cannot express my most humble thank yous to all of you who write with me: those of you that have been with me from the beginning of Logan's journey, those of you who have only recently joined me, and who I have yet to write with. Thank you.

While I know my activity can be incredibly sporadic nowadays, I thank you guys for your patience while I always add things to the queue. Even if they aren't a draft I'm still holding to find inspiration, whether it be a few memes thrown in the queue to spit out while I'm at work in an office now, I thank you for your understanding. I thank you for chatting with me on discord, I thank you for plotting amazing ships that give me such complete happiness each day or each time I see a new idea hurled my way. That excitement is so important for me to recognize and to share with all of you when I can.

I never dreamed Logan would come this far, with so many amazing ships. I never dreamed I would make so many friends here too, who I talk to as often as our busy lives will allow. And having the opportunity recently to try and plot and make friends with some new people who I'm very excited to meet and write with? It's an amazing feeling and brings me great joy and I hope I can offer that to you guys too.

All in all, thank you for everything: patience, plots, ideas, meme spams, ooc screaming, all of it. I plan to have a wonderful year here, even if I can't be here every day, I will be here when I have the energy and am always lurking to add something to the queue when I can.

/ @paramounticebound / @adversitybloomed / @smertzimy / @agoldenlily / @vuulpecula / @unexceptional / @sxrgeantbarnes / @shieldagentnatasharomanoff / @incissam / @inkpromise / @grimmusings / @f1rstresponder / @waehles / @legeandary / @inabcck / @respondedinkind / @mistrdctr / @ghostofwinter / @windfollws / @hcxcd / @aliarssmile / @darehearts / @thelcstunicorn / @goddessrisen / @amarvelousmencgerie / @webheadedhero / @agent-scotch / @goldenboybarracuda / @donebowing /

#ooc #tbd #i have no idea what this is just a general thank you post positivity idk #my brain is tired #but here it is so have with it what you will <3 #gotta leave soon for another errand but should be on later and definitely tomorrow for more queue stuffing <3

[thatone-brightstar]

When you said I’m loving all of your asks do you mean just in general or that you can see if posts an ask even when anonymous? If so that’s embarrassing for me lol. Even so, here’s another ask - Carmen isn’t one to play up the sexy for his partner and the reader doesn’t really mind - Carmen is sexy just standing there honestly. But Carmen feels like he isn’t pulling his weight when it comes to trying to seduce his partner. So he decides to play it up by idk role playing, or playing music, or giving a strip tease etc. whatever your heart desires. 💜

LMFAO don't worry babe i meant it in general i can't really see who asks. also thanks for pulling me from the depths of writer's block with this one. i know it's not what you asked but it's what came out lol

i think he would definitely go for something romantic. He'd try to win you with what he knows best, splurge most of his already reduced salary on imported prosciutto and creamy honey and dates goat's cheese for a charcuterie board he'd make himself because he heard you tell syd once how you always found those so romantic.

it’s cold outside, so an indoor picnic it is. candles around the room that he considered a fire hazard but that warmed the room with a soft cinnamon scent. low music from his stereo, the gray sweater you liked and a few sprites of cologne are added just in time before you crossed the door.

“hey-” he’s slightly out of breath, covering what view he can from the narrow hallway to the living room setup. “how was work?”

he moved by your side, taking you by the shoulders and pressing a kiss over your hair, then helped you out of your coat as you rambled on. 

“i swear one of these days i’m just gonna qui-” you stopped abruptly at the door to the living room, caught off guard by the multiple flickering lights. “...oh carmy.”

your face was unreadable from his position behind you and it could have been the lack of any movement from your part that made his hands grow clammy instantly and think that it might have been a stupid idea. 

“you hate it.” 

“what? no- no i’m-” it was only until you half turned towards him that he spotted the excited expression over your face, eyes slightly more dewy than normal. “carm, this is beautiful.”

carmy exhaled the deep breath caught in his chest, almost deflating, and finally closed the space between you. he circled his arms around you as your eyes danced around the little flickering lights. 

“are we celebrating something that i forgot?” you asked, for a second slightly worried until you felt his cheek rub beside yours with a shake. 

the music traveled in the air along with the sweet scent and he couldn’t help but sway from one side to the other in an effortless rhythm, taking you with him. “jus’ wanted to do somethin’ different.” is all he said

you turned  in his arms and placed a tender kiss over his cheek, taking a whiff of his intoxicating scent. your smile grew deeper into your face as you dug your nose into his neck and took a stronger inhale. 

you groaned and began placing sweet kisses over the exposed skin above his sweater. “god, i love how you smell.” 

carmy laughed into your hair, arms still tight around you while you continued to kiss him and he took step after step forward to guide you into the room. “c’mon, food’s gonna get cold.”

“it can wait.” you mumble, too entranced by the intoxicating smell.

he hissed slightly when the cold skin of your fingertips came in contact with the warmth under his shirt, but he didn’t complain, and he didn’t mind it either when your lips drew a sultry line up to his own.

#amy writes #carmy berzatto #the bear fx #carmy smut #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy the bear #carmy x reader #the bear tv #carmen 'carmy' berzatto #carmy berzatto smut #carmen berzatto smut

[tinystepsforward]

i've still been keeping tabs on what's happening at automattic. a couple of things i've observed:

toni schneider (who is a man btw), the interim ceo, has been quite open with staff in ways that mean they generally seem relieved to have him leading the company for now. i've heard people speak optimistically about him from all parts of the spectrum (by which i mean: staff who are trans tumblr users right through to staff who are "anti-woke" or whatever and were absolutely intolerable to work with as a trans person), which seems like... a good sign? maybe.

this relative transparency includes things like weekly updates from an executive level, as well as openly saying that he did have to directly speak to matt and encourage him to, you know, stop posting.

matt is back to his usual milquetoast blogging, and replied to someone on mastodon about the AI issue saying he'd comment on it when he's back in may, so whatever toni said to him seems to have worked for him keeping out of it for now.

people have no idea what it's gonna look like when matt's back.

the best case scenario is that schneider manages to create a significant enough boost in morale and productivity that "it'd be nice if we just kept him" becomes a sentiment that isn't held just by the rank and file. i don't know how likely that is, but there's a sense of cautious hope and of making the most of this reprieve from matt's increasingly erratic decisions no matter what.

the tumblr staff statement was approved by schneider and hr, so i am also hopeful they won't face repercussions. what they said might seem pretty mild from the outside, or carefully worded, but it's pretty clear to me and to most people who've worked at companies like this that it's a pretty bold one.

i'll quote a friend:

keep reminding the more histrionic elements out there that: 1. there really are trans people, INCLUDING TRANS WOMEN, in the fight here. 2. we don't have nearly the power they seem to think we do. 3. we're fighting anyway. was the statement we wrote enough? fuck no. does it fix everything? fuck no. but we literally called out the CEO, and got the greenlight for it from the interim CEO. i don't know where this will end, but that's not nothing.

i'm not sure automattic deserves the immense honor of having this many of its brave, dedicated trans staff put effort into trying to make it better. but it has them, and it would be wise to do its best to keep them. so many of us — even me, even now — believe in the ideals that drew us to the work automattic does, and hope that it can return to them. we will see!

other things i want to say:

the wellbeing of my friends on staff is my priority. i am interested primarily in their safety, and won't pressure them to give me goss. the ways i've spoken publicly are already pretty scary to people who might worry about retaliation against them just for being known to be my friend.

this is a regular personal blog. i'll keep updating if there's shit to update about, but i also don't work at automattic any more (thank fuck, again), have a life, and am not interested in declaring matt my specific nemesis or otherwise acting purely out of spite.

some of youse really deeply do not understand companies, the internet, generative ai, or pretty much anything else i've said. that's okay — big tech in particular is fucked up on purpose bc it benefits those in power to have it be incomprehensible! but maybe it's not a great position from which to get mad at me specifically or at staff for idk not personally assassinating matt.

got tired of blocking transphobes so i've turned anons off. i'll probably flick them back on eventually.

#tony muses #tumblr meta #<- just for my blog's tag search

[yandere-daze]

Love your yandere academy AU!! I have a few Thoughts on it if you don't mind...

First of all the inherent loneliness and otherness you'd feel as the only darling at school? Mwah 🤌 The constant fear of being found out? Delicious. In a way it almost reminds me of Furina in 4.2, having to put on a never-ending show, never letting anyone see your true colors. Her stakes might have been a little higher, sure, but the general vibe is the same.

Next I could imagine darling using the classes as a way to get a leg up on their classmates. They know everything the yanderes do, which helps to even out the playing field, even if just a little. It's easier to avoid being manipulated when you're taking the same psychology classes as the people trying to manipulate you.

Finally I've been thinking about how the yanderes would feel when falling for diet before their identity is discovered. Yanderes falling for other yanderes is rare, and when not reciprocated, it rarely ends well. Especially if darling is a straight A student, they'll know they have to work twice as hard to get them in their grasp, either willingly or not. And with so many people starting to take an interest in them? Even more work. Normally it'd be fine to deal with one or two rivals, but multiple classes of them? Not so simple.

Idk it's just a really neat idea and I'd love to see more of it sometime

First of all, thank you for sending in an ask! I´m very happy that feedback has been pretty positive so far because I was actually a bit hesitant on posting my idea at first. So this is really uplifting! ☺️

And yes, absolutely do share your thoughts with me if you have any, I love discussing ideas with other people, it´s one of the greatest things regarding fanfiction in my opinion 💕

So let´s discuss all of these concepts you brought up for a bit!

Introduction

1k words

gn reader

tw yandere, discussion of normalized toxic relationships, implied stalking, mention of murder

Yandere! Normalized Genshin Academy AU

First of all, yes, you´re totally right! I´m really happy that the inherent feeling of loneliness came through in my writing because it´s one of the first thoughts I had when envisioning this AU. Just imagine how truly alone you must feel, living in a world where all these toxic relationships are viewed as normal and even desirable. All your life, you´ve been terrified of the future, of when the day a yandere desires you would come. You´ve been having nightmares about the day you would feel eyes cling to you way too long for comfort.

And now, you find yourself in this gigantic mess. Not only will you have to stress over your new academy life, but also the people you have to cross paths with in the hallway every day. You have to keep your guard up and play along with the insanity going on around you all day long, you can´t rest or relax for even a second. Because one second might be enough to expose you as who you really are: a helpless darling within a sea of predators just waiting to sink their claws into you.

No matter what, while you´re here you can´t be your true self, you can´t speak your true thoughts because you would be putting yourself in danger. You try your best to stay away from your fellow students but isolating yourself like that feels just as lonely.

And sometimes, you catch yourself almost slipping up when you inevitably have to talk to another student. People like Thoma, Amber, or Kaveh have easy-going and friendly demeanors, they talk to you so eagerly that you can´t help but feel yourself let loose for a bit, only to realize with a start that even these people who seem nice and approachable have to hide dark feelings and thoughts if they´re going to this school. Maybe in another life, you might have loved to have them as close friends but you know how twisted they must be deep down. You cannot allow yourself to trust anyone here and it´s so mentally taxing.

Oh, absolutely! Darling might be terrified by what they´re being taught as if it was the most normal thing in the world but they´re certainly glad to know some of the tricks a yandere might use. They obviously don´t plan on ever using those tips themselves but it´s useful when it comes to keeping their guard up. Thanks to these classes, they know better than to readily accept gifts from any of their "friends" without thoroughly checking them for cameras beforehand.

It´s both a blessing and a curse, really. Darling has a harder time keeping up the facade when confronted with all these new wicked ways to ensnare a darling during classes but they also serve well as a safety precaution. Can´t be tricked if you know all the tricks yourself, right? Though their anxiety would probably skyrocket, questioning every little gesture, gift, or phrase directed at them.

And your last point is also a very interesting point that I would like to elaborate on a bit more! I indeed also think that yanderes dating yanderes would be a very rare thing and I´d even go so far as to say it might be discouraged by society at large. And it´s not for the logical reason one might think of. The fact that two yanderes together would probably cause a spike in murders or similar catastrophes is not the real problem here.

It´s the fact that two yanderes dating each other means that two poor darlings will now have to go without a yandere </3

Even though yanderes are very normalized, I would still say that they´re probably still a minority ( at least I sure hope for the good of the world that half the population isn´t some sort of crazed lovesick fool). This of course comes with the conseqence that there are many more darlings than there are yanderes. Factor in the fact that a darling x yandere relationship is seen as the ideal relationship, something to strive for, and very soon you will see why yanderes dating other yanderes is kind of frowned upon.

Now even fewer darlings will get to have a loving yandere partner!

To you, it´s sick and twisted that this is the consensus, that yanderes and all the horrible things that they do are so romanticized. But at the same time, you´re really glad for this being a thing now because it greatly reduces the risk of one of your fellow students pursuing you for as long as you can still pose as a yandere.

But just because it´s frowned upon doesn´t mean that it´s illegal or that it never happens. There isn´t really any reasoning with a yandere in love so when they have their sights set on someone, there´s pretty much no stopping them. And who would want to be the one to tell them that they shouldn´t be in love with another yandere? That they should give up on you? That wouldn´t go very well.

So sadly enough, once your fellow students grow really interested in you, even you being perceived as another yandere would be enough to deter them. Of course, they´ll have to be more careful when approaching this than if you were a darling. As mentioned, you know all about the different ways to "win someone´s heart" and so they´ll have to adapt their approaches in some way.

Of course, having multiple rivals for your love isn´t making things any easier. Trying to get close to you when you know all their tricks is hard enough, they don´t need any distractions trying to steal your affection. It will certainly turn into a very fierce competition soon and it only gets worse the more people grow infatuated with you.

Your only hope is that they´ll just spend all of their time trying to get rid of the others so that they leave you alone. You´ll certainly have to be very careful about how you interact with your classmates from now on. One compliment and they´ll latch onto the possibility of you secretly loving them as well and then they´ll certainly never let go of you.

Tag list: @charming-mage @blueventss @tonightwrites @lady-of-the-sith-leia-skywalker @kio-may @heartsforseo

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #yandere genshin impact x reader #yandere genshin impact #yandere academy au #genshin yandere academy au #normalized yandere au #genshin normalized yandere au #genshin impact au #yandere #cw yandere #yandere x reader #gn reader #cw obsession

[lestappenforever]

I find it funny how some people undermine Max and Charles’ friendship. The fact that we got to see a video of them and later photos of them playing padel that Charles himself organized is testament that they are friends. I mean if that video and the photos were not shared we would never have known that it happened, but we did.

This leads me to the essays I’ve seen around (yes, I’ve seen 3 now each with a different take) I like that we are all trying to analyze why we think the lestappen content posting by RBR (lbr SF are not even trying) but what if it’s just not that deep? Maybe they are just showing that two “rivals” as people so like to call them can have a good relationship/friendship off the track? Maybe it’s not about Charles going to RBR or RBR trying to foster a positive image for Max. Max has come to terms with the fact that not everyone likes him, he’s who he is the misunderstood-f1-bad-boy who is a generational talent. So yeah it’s not about his image either, a few fans may boo him or hate him but he’s still the third most followed f1 driver so…over 10million fans I mean that’s major for a “guy who’s not well liked” Idk I’ll go with Occam’s razor on this one. It’s just about friendship or it could be an EA promo thing. But then again why go through all that trouble just for EA when they could just drop the thing and leave it to the fans to chew on? Just food for thought inspired by the lovely essays by @tsarinasblog and @slythereen.

Anon, I absolutely love getting different takes on everything Lestappen, so thank you so much for sharing your input! ❤️

All the essays going around about have their appeal and I am honestly on board with all of them. But the one I agree with the absolute most is your take, because the idea of all of this being nothing more than Charles and Max proving that they are actually friends — that they genuinely like each other and enjoy each other's company — is the most beautiful take of it all and the mere thought of it warms my heart.

There is no way the padel date was the first ever time they hung out outside of F1, and I just think the whole recent development of their friendship is truly wonderful, regardless of what may or may not lie behind it.

#Asks #Anon asks #Lestappen asks #Lestappen dynamics anons #Lestappen Gate 2023

[dreamingcloudie]

❛❛ In which; Dottore as a streamer... ❜❜

✎ ❛❛ I'll have to admit, this character is quite... alluring.❜❜

Pairing(s): Streamer!Dottore x (kinda) Game-Character!GN!Reader (Mordern AU)

Genre/Format: N/A (headcanons)

Warning(s): wrote this at 6am without thinking straight so possible grammar mistakes and sentences that don't make sense

Notes: There really isn't much of x Reader here, sadly :( I might write more of this in the future but idk

I know i have requests to do but this idea came out of nowhere and it was too tempting to not write something for it— I've only written headcanon once so this is short. I have no idea if I'm doing this right 💀

Let's be real, this guy would probably stream live torture on the darkest part of the internet

BUT, let's just pretend in this AU he's not an evil doctor man <3

He is a tired university student who majors in biology and thrives to earn a position in the medical field

And that means becoming a coffee addict and endless nights of staying up late to study 

Sleeping? What's that?

I can see him being so focused on his studies to the point where he doesn't interact with the internet much

If someone showed him a popular meme he wouldn't understand 

Boomer

L

Due to how busy he is, he doesn't have the time to find a job

He lives off of the money his parents send him every month lol

That was until someone introduced him to the wonders of the internet…

One of his friends—Childe, told him something about a streaming platform and he should go check it out

And that night when he got home, he pulled his laptop out and searched for it

He also learnt that people can earn money streaming whatever

For instance, most of the people streams "let's plays"

He scrolled down a little and he found people streaming… questionable things, and he was baffled they get paid for it

So that means, he could stream anything he wants and he'd earn money from it, as long as he has a certain amount of viewers 

Say less

And an account was made 

This basically becomes his part-time job now

He usually streams to tutor struggling students and you best believe they were very thankful 

He'll sometime do "study with me" streams too

As he takes his fifteen minutes breaks from studying, he'd talk to his viewers 

And when I tell you this man has the driest humor ever—

That's what got his channel to grow

Viewers would clip his dry ass jokes and post them onto other social media platforms, which caused his view counts to blow up

As he got more and more popular, his viewers would beg him to do gaming streams

With how dry his humor is, they thought his commentary would be gold…

And they're absolutely correct, they get to see a different side of him too 

Surgeon simulator is the very first game he was introduced to by his fans, to get him interested in gaming

Man's cursing every time when he accidentally drops something

"Now, we put this lung over— Shit."

Cue chat spamming the Kek emote 

It's been months since he started to stream and things are going pretty well for him

He comes back home from his lectures today to find his Discord server is filled with loads of fans telling him to check a game out, mostly because of a certain character

The general chat is flooded with hundreds, and I mean hundreds of pictures of them

And Lo and Behold

It is you

The moment he first has his eyes on you, his jaw drops

God DAMN YOU LOOK FINE AS HELL

Not to mention that harness you have on you—

Ahem

Anyways

He doesn't even know who you are or what game you're from

But man he's head over heels for you already 

The next time he starts his stream, the first thing he says is:

"Everyone was going crazy on Discord yesterday about a game character. And now my question is…

"Who are they and which game are they from?"

Babygirl took his first step into the world of simping <3

#genshin x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin x you #genshin x yn #dottore #genshin impact #dottore x reader #dottore x y/n #dottore x you #genshin dottore #il dottore #fatui #fatui harbingers x reader #fatui harbingers

[meatsex]

This may be odd to say. But it is clear (to me!!) that you care about the sauce boss a lot in your art and find a lot of comfort in who he is. The way you draw his eyes & hair specifically really calls to your attention to detail that's present in all of your art. It doesn't come across as parasocial in the slightest either - you just genuinely like what he does and play with the idea of the dude and aren't weird about his personal life. Idk maybe I'm not making sense but it's nice to see.

Also, your art really does reflect the same type of feelings as Sachiko Kaneoya's captures, in my opinion. Your use of line work and shadows also speaks to the ukiyo-e prints of the Edo period of Japan, though I'm not sure if that's intentional!! Specifically, the Takiyasha the Witch print is what the shadowing reminds me of.

Lastly, the dedication to your projects and work as a whole is so impressive. I've been here for a while following your art and watching the progress has been so cool. Your colors have become a little more cohesive and pull pieces together - they always have, but the grasp on color theory is clear there. Seeing that you're going to college to pursue what you put so much work into is the dream and I really hope it works out!!

I'm so sorry for how long this is and if it's weird, absolutely don't feel the need to respond especially since you can't shorten the post and I can't get it under a readmore. I also understand that having an anonymous person do a mini-tour and discussion of your art could be uhh possibly odd. If anything, keep being cool and doing what you love!!! It's awesome!!!!

hey, thank you for such a nice indepth message and analysis on my work, i promise it really isnt weird or at the very least any weirder than other messages ive got LOL

thank you for appreciating my art of vincent, i usually mention this but a lot of times i mostly draw inspired by his music rather than him as an internet personality which is why i end up making these edgy pieces but in general he does mean a lot to me in the most normal appreciate way possible both as a musician and as a streamer, i try not to streamline the way i draw him too much so im glad the small details are noticeable

i can confirm i get inspired (and always have been honesly) by kaneoya sachiko's works if it wasnt obvious enough but i am also happy to hear that i can give off a similar vibe, not because i want to give off the exact specific vibes of her artwork but rather some of similar tones and types; as for the other thing that actually isnt on purpose, id have to look into artwork from that period but thats one hell of a compliment tbh

im really happy to hear that you have been around for a while, i cannot know since when but either way it means a lot that someone would take the time to not just point out my improvement but also to just stay around because they like what i do, i personally feel like ive improved especially in colors like you mentioned but its always better and helpful to hear it from someone else too, i hope that with college i can become better at art too

in any case thank you again for taking the time to send such a positive thought-out message, i dont want to repeat in-depth but it really is and it means the world to me that you took the time to send it and i promise its not weird at all

#po/box #i will admit that when i opened my ask box and saw a really long message i got scared before i began recognizing positive words lol #its nice to get something like this for a change along with the other nice messages i keep for myself #long post #<- if you are a hater

[springtrappd]

@limbsandheads this entire blog has actually been an elaborate operation to convert as many people to vannyism as possible via the "shite posts" of the youth. Glad to see it's working

jokes aside: HEHEHEHE THANK YOU... yeah a big part of getting comfy in my niche here has been getting comfortable enough to actually, like, POST my anaylsis /because/ of the complete lack of it elsewhere. being counterculture can be a tough place to be in! the amount of times i've had to hold myself back or scrap something bc i'm unsure if i'm gonna get dragged into explaining, idk, what a fucking metaphor is or some shit... ugh. awful do not recommend. i'm not sure what's worse: people who refuse to believe that parallels exist, or people that understand that parallels exist but only as fodder for theories (which are, as we all know, the most important part of any satisfying story)

i think people in general have a hostile response to any kind of serious analysis precisely because it's serious; it feels like... there's this pervasive sense -- particularly when you talk to the people that i'm thinking of here -- that academia is somehow Other or (views itself as) Superior in some way, thus making the act of engaging in it about posturing rather than, well. study. people have a very strict idea of what art is, even if only subconsciously, and react accordingly when the Other comes in to try and take away their favourite toy. games are fun; analysis is not. why can't you just let people enjoy things, you're just doing this for attention, etc etc etc. it's a position borne of ignorance, one that assumes that you can separate art from play at all -- and one that finds itself most vulnerable to exploitation. it's fundamentally reactionary rhetoric, is what i'm getting at here, and why i can so easily swap out stupid fnaf jargon for a conservative strawman and still get the point across.

anti-intellectualism sucks because it sucks all the joy out of art. like, for all i joke about being fuelled by spite, you'll find that even my most virulent snark comes from a place of love. i talk about this shit because i love it; because i love the actors and writers and art directors and character designers and production teams and editors, every single one of them, and there's nothing quite as intimate as a dissection. to peel back the layers of a piece of art is to ultimately shine a light on the things beneath -- all the blood and bone and gristle, where the artist has been pressed between the pages... to look at someone and know them, to sit and think about what they wanted to say -- what is that, if not love?

you aren't born knowing how to say "i love you". it's something you've gotta learn. and this is what we in the biz call a """METAPHOR""",

also, while we're here: fun fact! i actually write a lot of my stuff off-the-cuff, which is why the flow is often weird/words are missing/it might take a wild left turn away from the original subject? (like i'm low-key doing rn!) it's something that makes me cringe, but also fuels my desire to get around to writing a proper essay abt this terrible franchise eventually... i've got pages of bullet points & notes scattered around the place (& hundreds of discord messages to pull from, oh god), it's just the practical part of it that makes me want to crawl back into my skin. until then you are stuck with the Crazed Ravings (Autism Flavour), (un)fortunately (depending on how you look at it)

#speaking! #limbsandheads #replies #you get a separate post bc it got WAYYY too long lmao #it's my specialty <3 #ignore how nonsensical this got i am falling asleep

[rosiesramblings]

Ted Lasso Tickle HC's

Ok, fine. I wasn't in the mood to write a whole fic so here are some headcannons I spent an embarrassing amount of time on lol. Let me know what you think/if you have any headcannons I didn't include

Spoilers for the show Ted Lasso. Not too many I don't think but enough for me to put a warning. Sorry for the formatting I couldn't figure out how to do bullet points on only part of the post.

Jamie Tartt

Such a fucking lee it's not even funny

My touch-starved baby

Always after attention, no matter what kind

Dr. Sharon helps him unpack this and channel his need for attention into more positive behaviors like making people laugh, doing small kind things for others, etc

The team accepts Jamie back as a teammate after the Dubai Air protest. But they start actually liking him as a friend once they figure out how ticklish he is. 

In the later seasons, winds Roy up on purpose cause he knows it will end with him howling on the floor with Roy spidering over his ribs mercilessly

Whenever Jamie’s being a prick without getting the signal first, someone on the team will trap him in a bear hug and claw at his tummy

It’s really hard to be mad at Jamie when he’s being held up by a teammate, cackling after his legs gave out after a few pokes

The only one brave enough to poke the bear that is Roy Kent (other than Keeley)

It never ends well for him

Or does it?

Worst spots are ribs and hips

Light bicep tickles als get him really bad, but really only Keeley knows this

Roy Kent

Holy shit

Do NOT piss this man off, he will wreck you

Early in their relationship he would try and tickle Keeley. That stopped pretty quick when he realized Keeley dished it out ten times worse

The only people who know how ticklish he is are Keeley, Jamie, Phoebe, Phoebe’s mom (does she have a name in cannon? Idk) and, oddly, Coach Beard

And he has threatened all of them in order to make sure it stays that way

Roy has no idea how Beard knows and that scares the shit out of him

Beard says that Roy just looks ticklish. Really he was in the office late one night when Keeley came to pick Roy up and saw him jump a foot in the air when she dug a finger into his armpit

Knows that Jamie sometimes riles him up. He lets him because somewhere he knows that Jamie needs this. Also it is quite satisfying. Even better than taking a swing at him to be honest.

Worst spots are under his arms, his neck, and light tickles behind his knees on good days

Keeley Jones

Queen of the lers

Her nails should be classified as weapons

Roy and Jamie both know this

They also know the other one probably knows this. They never talk about it.

She’s the one who let Jamie’s ticklishness slip to Roy

Will let Roy or Jamie get a few pokes in but quickly turns the tables

Rebecca is the only one who knows about the spot being her ears

Colin Hughes

Will absolutely shout, “For Wales!” before pouncing on someone, regardless of whether or not the preceding conversation had anything to do with Wales

His shoulder blades are a death spot

Anything lighter than a firm pat on the back will make his shoulders shoot up to his ears

One of the only people who is allowed to tickle Isaac with few to no repercussions

Generally prefers being the ler, he got enough experience being a lee when he was growing up

Dani Rojas

Sunshine golden retriever man

Loves making people laugh

Will coo at his teammates in Spanish while he tickles them

That’s actually how they find out that Jamie’s been trying to learn Spanish for Dani to make him less homesick. Dani teases him lightly while spidering over his sides, and Jamie BLUSHES hard cause he can actually understand ¾ of what Dani’s saying. Dani tickles him more often after that as a thank you

Sam Obisanya

Ticklish just about everywhere

Doesn’t mind being tickled

Very persuasive - will easily convince people that a certain player needs to be tickled

That makes him dangerous

Excellent reader of people - was the first person to realize that Jamie likes being tickled

Isaac McAdo

Quite a tickle monster in the early seasons

After he becomes captain, is more reserved and conscious that the other guys look up to him

If he ever gets too in his head, Colin is more than happy to bring him back to earth

Also sometimes resorts to tickles to keep the other guys in line

Will sneak in neck and ear tickles to each guy’s haircut every season

Jan Maas

The absolute best at teasing but only because he’s so naturally blunt and honest

“This spot is much worse than your sides.”

“You are very ticklish. Does it ever become a problem?”

“Are we supposed to pretend that we don’t know you are enjoying this?”

“You squirm as if you want to get away, but you do not push away my hands.”

“You are a professional footballer, it would be very easy for you to get away.”

He strikes me as someone who just isn’t ticklish, which Jamie whines is unfair

Coach Beard

Knows where everyone is ticklish and is super scary about it

Rarely actually tickles people. Its bad enough that they know that he could. The one exception is Ted, who he tickles all the time when they’re alone/don’t have an audience, with a completely straight face

#ted lasso headcanon #ted lasso tickle headcannon #tickling #tfb community #ted lasso characters #jamie tartt #roy kent #keeley jones #afc richmond players #tickle headcannons

[silk-scarlet-ribbons]

I binge-read (which, I'll admit, doesn't do your pacing justice. Planning on rereading it slower lol) your work "children of the stars" and i have. so many (positive) thoughts

I don't usually read sa recovery fics coz I feel like it's common for authors to emphasize the pain more than the recovery-- which, coz fanfic is usually used to vent, isn't bad per se, its just not my thing -- but i was really pleasantly surprised by yours. I love how you express how fucked Tim's situation is while in Jason's POV coz you never really take away from it, while still portraying the distress that he feels and the forced (by law) compliance that often comes with SA by authority figures. How Jason has to walk himself through putting the kid over his anger is gut-wrenchingly amazing (esp with taking the Pit into account), and how Jason works on himself and is generally happier for/because of Tim genuinely made me have to stand up in certain parts. It shows how much Jason doesn't want his own experiences to repeat (both with his alluded to childhood, and with Bruce) and proves how different he is to the character Tim's initially been threatened with. That eventually crescendoing into him calling the exact person he's so cautious of being like??? Actually made me want to die (in a good way).

You also make sure to still express that Tim is a child, which I really appreciated coz i feel like when younger people go through that, it tends to be made into a "step into maturity". Tim just. God, I cried so hard at the "I'll be brave until you get there". The idea that he thinks it'll happen again contrasted with the trust he has in Jason is so aauuuugggghh

Also?? I really really related to Dick in this particular work because of how you portrayed his own reactions and experiences. Coping by taking on responsibility and then having to shed that abruptly when someone else has experienced a similar situation was something I really really liked your approach to. Especially after he finds that Tim has the same/similar trigger to him?? Every different experience with SA that you wrote hit so hard. Definitely one of my favorite reps so far. God. I love all of your character writing. DUDE ALSO WITH BRUCE?? ALFRED?? MARCO?? You described all of the bat's grief and longing for what was so welllll.

Just. Really really refreshing read, 100% gonna go through the rest of your works. Sorry if this was long winded or annoying lol, feel free to disregard if you want to. Either way, thank you so much for posting that (for free!) and I look forward to future chapters if you write any more :)

in case you were wondering, anon, this reply is so late because i spent the last week crying over it <3 /lh

Ohhh man oh man. OH MAN. OH MAN! this is honestly so kind,,, jkjkjdfkjdf Jason and Tim's journeys in CotS as they try to rationalize with what happened to them while still allowing themselves to be juvenile, somehow, was basically a cornerstone in the fic, and I'm so beyond excited and grateful that there are people who genuinely enjoyed that aspect of it. AND DICK, MY BELOVED.... I could never leave him out of it either, I love that guy.

It just means the world to me that you enjoyed this so much? Idk it's like the horrors of being perceived but they're not horrors, they're joys. The joys of having my fic perceived. Grief is one of my favorite things to write for how powerful it is, and getting this kind of feedback only makes me want to keep going (especially now, when I've been hitting a dearth of creativity, lol).

I have one more official chapter planned for CotS--- it's proving to be the hardest to write, because on my life I hate finishing things. Sometimes I can't finish things. But this makes me want to finish it just to give this fic's wonderful, wonderful readers a conclusion.

This was not annoying at all-- I genuinely read it, like, seven-eight times. It was an absolute light for my entire week. Never apologize for doing this for the works you love, I promise you we are reading and we are cherishing.

#fic talk #children of the stars art #anon ask #ask scar #thank you so much op #you are genuinely a light #<3333

[cilil]

🏜️, 🧩 and 🧃 for the ask game ❤️

Thanks for the ask, love❤️

🏜️ ⇢ what's your favourite type of comment to receive on your work?

As I'm sure many authors do I always love and appreciate the long comments going through a lot of things that happen in the fic and adding their two cents, like for example what people use the floating comment box for or them going through certain story beats on their own like "there was this thing that I liked and then this thing happened and I loved that".

In general I just LOVE to hear people's thoughts and what resonated with them on a personal level because some throwaway line for me may be someone else's top quote. I also don't mind and actually really appreciate commenters expressing that they don't usually read fics like the one in question but tried it and liked it anyway or that they got into a new ship or headcanon or that they saw something different in it than I do - in my jurisdiction one of the defining qualities of art is that it can always receive new and different interpretations, so it makes me feel like I created an "artsy" thing :3

Just to be clear in case any readers and commenters are reading this, everything I mentioned can very much be expressed in one sentence, there is absolutely no need or obligation for the aforementioned long comments; only wanted to honor the time and effort that goes into those in particular :)

🧩 ⇢ what will make you click away from a fanfiction immediately?

Not too many things I dare say, but:

A) A character being very "OOC"/misinterpreted to the point of being unrecognizable, especially if it feels like it's coming from a place of malice on the author's part and they're bashing the character (we don't like that on this blog). Now, I actually don't like using the term "OOC" here (just couldn't think of something better) because I am willing to bet that I have written stuff others see as OOC either in regards to canon or their headcanons and I probably read and enjoyed that sort of material in other cases too; I suppose we all have varying levels of tolerance for that. What I mean by being unrecognizable is for example if character A is canonically kind, friendly, patient, polite and then suddenly they're written as super angry, hostile, rude and abrasive in a fic - again especially if I have grounds to believe that the author did this because they dislike A and want others to do so too. It's just... idk man it feels icky to me and if I like that character the whole atmosphere begins to feel hostile to me on a personal level as well

B) The story is confusing for me (I really want to avoid making any comments about "badly written" fic here because this is a hobby and people are allowed to be learning and improving on all levels and at their own pace, so I'm highlighting that these cases are about me having personal difficulties others might not have). I don't even care much about grammar mistakes or the prose not being super smooth or a bit of confusion when it comes to who's talking or who's in what position, but if the story gets confusing to the point that it feels jarring or I don't know what's going on and why anymore, I may stop reading.

🧃 ⇢ share some personal lore you never posted about before

There's actually a bit of lore specific to this day, but it's a bit of a sad and sensitive matter so I won't bother anyone with it.

Instead something funny: I own a little plant collection, mostly cacti and succulents, but there's also some sort of poisonous bush thingy. I have no idea what kind of plant it is; in fact I have no idea what any of them are beyond "cactus", "succulent" and "the bush". One succulent of unknown origin has outgrown its pot twice now and is about to conquer the third. I'm going to need an entire garden for it one day, I fear.

#ask game #cílil answers #so much cílil lore is pure crack #you could put me into any cartoon and it wouldn't be weird #appearance wise as well #hahaha #writers truth or dare

[italoniponic]

Hello again!!! It's Swimmy. 😁 I'm currently writing my first Twisted Wonderland fanfiction and I'm excited about it and wanted to tell someone! It's based on this idea I had where MC finds out that she can't go home, ever. And so she's gotta start planning for her future, her forever in Twisted Wonderland. And Crowley, being as "generous" as she is, decides to offer some helpful ideas... and it's actually just one idea: she needs to get married after graduation and someone has to take care of her.

Of course MC is like "WHAT? NO." But her arguing isn't doing anything. Crowley, Crewel, Vargas, and even Trein are discussing her "options" and who'd be better out of her friends. I've only got bits and pieces so far, but I've got lines like, "what about Azul Ashengrotto?" "What if he divorces her? There is no way he won't make her sign a prenuptial agreement!" And "We could put her with Kingscholar, but I don't think he'd allow Grim to tag along, and Grim is her deal-breaker." "Deal-breaker?! Do you think she's in any position to be picky?!"

🤣 I'm really excited about it, even if it's more so considered a "crack" fanfiction, I guess. I can't wait to work on it more, your posts are always so fun to read and I wanna give it a try myself!

- Swimmy

Crack fics? I'm all for them! LOL

The options had me dying fr MC probably didn't even has money enough to one of those prenuptial agreement and for her to just get rid of Grim? Our cute little local monster cat/racoon? Never

idk when you're going to post this but PLEASE tag me! I really want to read that! I wish success for your writing, Swimmy~ Good luck!

I'm always happy to see you again. And, please, if you have more of those proposal hcs send me more! It's literally my third famous post and it made me so glad bc I like these themes <3 Thank you for coming by again!

God bless you! Bye bye~

#twisted wonderland #cater diamond #azul ashengrotto #leona kingscholar #twst x reader #mc/yuu #cherry's reply #cherry's mumbling about twst

[lulu-balu]

Booooy howdy here's a bit of a doozy. Where do I begin!

Well I chose my old username back in mid 2017 when I was a wee lass writing silly fics on fanfiction.net. I chose it because it was Italian for "You are beautiful", because 1) I'm half Italian and 2) I thought it was sweet and wholesome.

To start: as I said above, I'm half Italian. That's because I'm Italian-American, that side of the family *has* been for quite a few generations now and they absolutely fit ALL the stereotypes you could think of when you hear "Italian-American". Stupidly proud of their heritage, and usage of silly botched up slang all while knowing little to no actual Italian. I know some stuff mainly through osmosis but yea. I definitely can't speak the language and I'll admit I simply do not have the brain power to memorize another language. I tried it with Spanish in high school already and it didn't go very well LOL

So yeah. I was one of "those" people as a teen. Idk why, it's stupid and I'm simply not like that anymore! So that's the biggest reason, but it's also not the only reason.

Number two is simplicity. Seeing that it's a common Italian phrase it's no surprise that "Sei Bellissima" straight up is taken across different sites, leading me to have to make some funky additions so that I can make accounts on there. This can lead to some confusion. Not to mention those additions can make the username long as hell in general and a pain to type out. So I went for a shorter name that will still be easier to remember, even in the cases where additions are necessary.

And uhh regarding the "Sweet and wholesome" thing- I still try to be positive where I can, but I've been through the wringer a *lot* since then and I simply do not have as much happy energy as I did back then. Believe me, it's sad and I really had no idea what was coming for me at the time but- being that overtly positive all the time definitely drained me a lot more than necessary. I guess that's another reason for a change; it all just didn't fit who I am anymore.

So yeah, to put it all simply: it doesn't represent the kind of person I perceive myself to be today, so I decided it was time for a change. As for my decision-making process behind that change?

Lulubalu is pronounced "loo-loo-buh-loo" and is derived from the word "hullabaloo", which is a word used to refer to a commotion or fuss over something. I kinda think it fits how I react to things I really enjoy and hyperfixate on; I just go absolutely nuts. Mostly not publicly but uh. Yeah I'm very enthusiastic sdfjkhsk

The "Lulu" part is just because I like that name and the way it sounds when spoken. It isn't even my real name I just like it a lot lol. Speaking of. When you wanna speak to me now, you can use "Lulu" to address me

ANYWAY. I'm still me; I've certainly changed a lot over the years and the username change is a nice way to reflect that, I think. All of the stuff I've posted over the years is still here so if you've got anything bookmarked you'll want to update that (I will be changing my art tag to [#lulu's doodles] and will be taking the free time I have to update all the posts skdjfhskj). Buuuut otherwise I think that's it. If you've made it this far, thanks for reading and enjoying the stuff I've put out over the years <3

#lulu rambles #longpost

[gerardpilled]

how's it feel to a be a lesbian on mcr tumblr? I know a lot of trans ppl are fans and have those kinds of connections to their music. is it any different for you?

This is a real interesting question thank you for asking!!!

Hm. okay, so I'm not going to pretend being a white gay person in the mcr community is difficult, but i feel like the best way i could sum up any form of negative i might experience is "isolating"? It's been a journey, I guess. There's also positive.

Positive first: When it comes to their music, honestly i've never really had trouble relating to a perspective Gerard has taken in terms of identity. Gerard has mainly written about relationships with women, but also i never feel like i need to relate to a song 1 to 1 when it comes to singing about love and heartbreak if the song is good. plus i have always enjoyed using music as a means to empathize with different experiences rather than having it describe my own experience perfectly.

When it comes to being online -> as a teen i more or less identified as bisexual but even then i felt like i was missing something when i saw how people talked about the mcr members. I feel like i was just thinking "i'm not like other girls, I don't like mcr because i want to sleep with them". I would receive asks like "who would you rather fuck - gerard or frank" and i remember thinking "wait do people actually want to sleep with them..."

Nowadays it feels a little different. I don't know. It's complicated to explain my emotions towards this. Like, that confusion i feel when people seriously talk about wanting to fuck any of them is still there. But then there's Gerard. [full stop]. I am not saying I view Gerard as a woman or transfem (a label i feel like Gerard should give us before i feel comfortable seriously using it), but recently i've felt more of a connection to him and his identity. Personally, I have always kinda vibed with the idea that 'lesbian' is both a sexuality and a gender. I consider myself attracted to women and whatever fellow lesbians identify as, and have always kinda leaned towards more neutral-presenting people. Gerard is someone i have never met and probably never will meet in any meaningful capacity. To me, when looking at photos he is more or less an outer shell (which sounds insulting and dehumanizing but trust me it's not). I feel like any form of attraction i may feel towards him is with 25 different layers of mental filters and imaginary-versions-that-live-in-my-head. If I was in the room with him and was given the serious option to sleep with him, the answer would probably be no lol. BASICALLY I explained all that to say -> i feel almost like I have to watch what i say when making posts about how I think he looks hot or else i'm going to be accused of 'bad lesbian rep' or misgendering, and, idk. maybe it is breaking some kind of lesbian code. it's such an imaginary scenario that i don't really care.

But yeah, idk if any of that made sense. to be honest i don't really read a whole lot of theory or whatever surrounding the nuances of sexuality. I should also say all of this has been very theoretical LMFAO. I only really started going on dates last year and had my first kiss at 22. Was never really interested in hookups or anything like that. I am in a relationship now, but in general I have just not lived what people might consider the typical lesbian experience.

#long post #lesbianology

[impunkster-syndrome]

thanks for responding

well, i’ve interacted with ppl of various stances, but what’s more important is that i’ve never been victimized by either of them, that’s for sure.

yes, i am aware of most thing you have listed, tho that’s not really what my ask was about.

i should’ve explained my intentions or something ig. and yes, i do mean no disrespect, as in “i have no beef with your views in general or with you personally, i’m not trying to defend or call out or proselytize any syscourse position” and i’m not here to invalidate your personal experiences, okay? i’ve read a post in my recs and i felt like i don’t agree with this wording yet am unsure if i’m on with this sentiment, so i wanted to challenge the part i’m weirded out by and mb see the logic behind it. that’s all, basically.

i believe i don’t owe my medical information to anyone? i’ll just say that if i didn’t think it’s appropriate for me to speak on this i sure as hell wouldn’t. anyway, you don’t have to believe me and i have no way to prove that my intentions aren’t sinister, so idk whatever.

frankly, i personally really dislike online discourses as a whole - it’s just an unstructured swamp of polarized radicalizing opinions that lead to no factual real-life activism, breeding hypervigilance and hostility instead, perpetuating constant infighting and harassment. i do understand where both positions are coming from but imo both “camps” suck if you dig deep enough and i’d say the “pro-/anti-endo” and “anti-/sysmed” labels are entirely useless beyond mentioning in DNIs and blacklisting tags, but i digress.

back to the ask. what i said wasn’t just “the experiences are different”, i specifically stated that disabled disordered systems are generally more vulnerable to ableism, saneism and stigma cuz of the symptoms that the disordered dissociation has vs. cases where plurality is non-disordered and non-disabling. so how is it “punk” and “pro-disability” to claim otherwise? i agree that disregarding any non-dissociative case as not oppressed is unfair, but if such case has any other stigmatized or systemhood-adjacent mental health issues then i wasn’t referring to that as “non-disabled” in the first place. or is that literally what you meant by “regardless of the intersection” bit in the og post?

the second part of the ask is settled, i agree to that.

Nowhere in either the ask or the original post does it say "regardless of intersection." It does mention intersectionality, but you're literally putting words in my mouth that never were there. At this point you are coming at this from a defensive perspective because you just keep making up shit like the idea of sysmedicalism being useful to disordered systems and making up your whole ass new definition of it (Plus the idea that plural always = dissociative disorder when that isn't the case even for some disordered systems!). Go reread the first post because you clearly didn't remember jack shit from it.

I have DID. Professionally diagnosed and medically recognized before then. I've been denied psychiatric and medical care due to it. We're RAMCOA survivors and have multiple sidesystems. We have experienced ableism from anti-endos and pro-endos. And I used to be a sysmed right before finding out I was a system at all. I've seen people actually fake systems and get outed due to admitting it- and funnily enough most were sysmeds.

My idea was that all plurality is a mental illness that was inherently always medical and is something to be "fixed." I saw a lot of chronic conditions like that. Now that I've gone through the journey of discovery, I don't see the state of being plural as inherently medical- but the distress and trauma can be. That's the big difference. Sysmedicalism sees the state of existing as plural as inherently from trauma and suffering, and therefore inherently a disorder and medical.

I don't think every system should have to see their existence as something that is inherently disordered or from trauma if they personally choose not to. Forcing disabled systems (Because, let's be real here, disordered systems are disabled and you brought it up) to view their existence as inherently medical, as something defined by suffering, is cruel and allows for no diversity in our disability. We aren't allowed to be happy in how we exist- we have to see ourselves as ableist singlets see us. Poor disabled things so broken by our experiences that we cannot know ourselves.

Sysmedicalism has this kind of ableism too since it bases the view of systems on the ideas of the ableist people who want to "cure" us of plurality. You see it in the "endos just don't know they're traumatized," "(introject) is too popular so everyone with it is faking," "you have to be traumagenic to really be a system," etc. The term itself- "system medicalist" is not useless. It is specifically for describing a set of beliefs that do actual damage. Calling it useless or performative to have a stance on something that is ableism that is extremely common online and so frequently has lead to doxxing, suicide baiting, threats, and no progress on actually talking about plural unity just shows how disconnected you are. So many people are so "Oh this is just online" when you do realize that these beliefs are held by people when offline, right? Online is just where people can be as rancid and ignorant as possible with little to no consequences.

You're playing defense for ableism because your whole ass first ask was going "Oh sysmedicalism isn't too bad because of my personal definition of it and inexperience with being impacted by it." Do you realize how you sound to anyone actually in tune with disability advocacy and has been in many plural spaces for years? To someone who has actually seen what sysmedicalism is and how that is the same beliefs of the neurologist who believed my DID makes me unlikely to actually know what I am experiencing just coming from the mouth of often a singlet inserting themselves into our discussions with tokenization or another system?

You keep making shit up. No one is saying that disabled systems are not impacted by ableism. What I am saying is that the idea of all systems being disordered, traumagenic, needing to have arbitrary criteria hit, and defined by our suffering is not helpful to fighting the ableism we experience from each other and others. This is on you for not knowing what sysmedicalism actually is and making it my problem that you keep pulling shit out of thin air to say I am saying it. Send me an ask one more time and you're getting blocked because I have repeatedly told you what sysmedicalism actually is and you're just being intentionally obtuse if you send another ask making shit up.

#madpunk #the blackbox askbox #mad pride #pluralgang #disordered plurality

[femboykaz]

Your new tumblr name (title? pseudonym?) is terribly intriguing will you please share your wisdom/headcanon

Ahahaha, so, I have to be honest it came more from an inside joke with a couple friends than a specific "kaz is a femboy" headcanon. But also, I think it works well with Thoughts/headcanons that I've had about Kaz anyway so I stand by it lmao, so!

I've kind of always imagined Kaz as being very gnc (if not trans or enby). He presents himself however is convenient for him in the moment (for jobs, cons, etc.), or to make a statement (mocking the merchers), but when the way he presents doesn't really matter, that all goes out the window. Which doesn't have to be tied to Femboy Kaz but it can be, and I think he'd very much be the kind of person to say "fuck gender norms I do what I want" (insert tangent about autistic!kaz and social norms/expectations in general here) and at some point he realizes that what he wants is to wear pretty dresses and makeup thank you very much

And it can serve a purpose beyond personal feelings too! It's no 'mock the merchers and make them uncomfortable by dressing as one of them' but I think he still could (and would) use it to make a point and as a a sort of... act of rebellion? (since we have at least some indication that sexism/misogyny is prevalent at least to some extent in the grishaverse), especially if he found out any of his crew (crows or otherwise) had been having problems with it. Like just, him whole-heartedly embracing femininity and making it everyone else's problem, he knows it doesn't change anything, it isn't a weakness or something to hide/be ashamed of --- in him or anyone else --- etc., and he will gladly make other people uncomfortable with that and put them in the position of having to either face that or do mental gymnastics to hold on to their preconceived ideas

Also also also! I dunno I just generally have feelings about like…. As Kaz starts to heal, he has to open up not just to his friends but also to himself? If that makes sense? Like he has to figure out who he is as a person, just himself --- no 'I live to exact revenge in Jordie's name', no masks/personas, no Dregs, no Inej and Jesper & Co., just. Him.

(Which isn't to say these aren't still critical aspects of/don't have a critical role in who he is, but. Ya know. There's more to it, he has to figure out who he is beyond that, etc. I'm definitely not explaining this well but hopefully my point is getting across?)

Anyway, sorry, bit of a tangent there. Point is, I think his healing journey comes with its fair share of self exploration/discovery, and I imagine gender presentation/exploring femininity, especially as a man, being an unexpected but important part of that.

But I think one of the biggest things for me here is that like… disability (trauma, chronic pain, mental illness) can be really alienating, not just from society/people around you but also from yourself and your own body? And how you dress and generally present can be incredibly important regardless of identity and neurotype and physical capabilities and all that, but then to bring in those other aspects --- the way it impacts how others view and treat you, how you generally feel, your own connection to your body and personhood, etc (how many times can I use "etc." in this post, lol) --- as well... Idk maybe this isn't a common experience but at least to me that all really intensifies the role/importance of outward presentation?

Plus, between his reputation and his limp/cane and the gloves, Kaz is probably already so accustomed to people taking the very nature of his existence as an invitation to… be invasive, I guess? (There's definitely a better way to explain what I mean but.) But anyway, even if a lot of the time people know better than to actually push him or voice their speculations and invasiveness to his face, it does happen and he knows it, so what's one more thing to give them? * Cue fun femboy times *

Idk if I… actually made any sense here and I was definitely very brief/vague but. Just some of my thoughts. If I was better at putting said thoughts into coherent words for people not living inside my brain, I'd be writing a whole essay on this, but alas….

Sorry I feel like this is probably a disappointing answer since none of it is actually inherently about Kaz being a femboy, but it's also not a specific headcanon I have about him, just something that can fit well with ideas/thoughts/headcanons/what have you that I had already, so I don't have much to offer there.

#thanks for asking friend <3 #six of crows #kaz brekker #headcanons #does this count as meta? I don't think it counts as meta #this is really just me rambling but #hopefully it was somewhat coherent and close to what you were looking for? #I actually have a fic in my 'to write' list that's centered around exploring this stuff #with a few of the characters #maybe I should try my hand at that again