#i just don't like spending thousands of dollars!

[susiephone]

the thing is that i actually love academia and would happily be a student forever and pursue 10000 degrees if it didn't cost so much goddamn money

#i just started grad school and like. it's nervewracking sure. #there are parts of it i don't love. #but i feel like i really belong here. i like learning! i like reading! #i like sipping my silly little drink and listening to my silly little study playlist on my headphones while i read in the library! #i just don't like spending thousands of dollars! #college #mfa #grad school

[icewindandboringhorror]

I got these shoes from someone recently but thought they were way too plain looking, so I set out on a quest to customize them with some sharpies and charms and miscellaneous ribbon I had in my craft drawers. Mostly sky themed (clouds, rainbows, rain, stars, etc.) because that's my favorite aesthetic, but I had to include some cat imagery as well, of course lol.

#also honestly had NO IDEA that real converse have that star logo on the INSIDE not the outer part??? why the hell would you want it on the #inner portion where nobody can see it?? my entire life I always would have sworn it was on the outer facing portion.. #I think these would be perfect IF they were just slightly taller (top part higher above ankles instead of just weird hard material digging #right into your ankle whenever you walk) and if they were actual good platforms. they're so short. It's good that 'chunky' shoes are gettin #more popular as they've always been my favorite Look ever since I had these shoes with roller skates that pop out of thebottom (not heelys. #but like. before those. it was two whole entire roller skate wheels like a normal pair of roller skates) and the bottoms were so tall and #clunky and it made my feet look giant (because it had.. entire wheels in the bottom pockets lol). so #I've alwatys been into the aesthetic but . still I find a lot of the 'brands jumping on trend' are too short of platforms #OR they're plafrorms with a raised back/heel/wedge which to me is not aesthetically good and also makes them exceptionally uncomfortable to #wear compared to just plain completely flat chunky platform bottoms. ANYWAY.. if these shoes had a 3 or 4 inch platform I think they'd be #cooler. however for what they are it's still fine! and I like them more now that they actually have some sort of anything to them and #aren't just plain white. The weird thing is that the material it's made out of (maybe some sort of leather or something) absorbs sharpie? #the color changes over time. You draw a mark and then leave it for a few days and it either fades into being barely there or has changed #colors. so I had to go back in and redo parts. ALSO the shoe chains are so funny because I did NOT have the right tools for them #I don't have the stuff to make bracelets or open and close the little rings. they're held onto the shoe with just safety pins and the actua #little rung things that hold the charms on half of them are like broken or the metal is just jam smushed together bent and warped hhbjhjhb #I actually like the back a lot where there's the irridecent star thing hot glued on there. it's cool and shiny. and the clouds #are sparkly on the main parts of the shoe though I'm not sure how well it shows up in pictures #ANYWAY... shoegs..... If I were rich this is one of the things I would definitely custom order from craftsman #why would I spend like thousands of dollars on plain ass shoes that are just expensive because they're a Luxury Brand when I could literall #like pay people to create me custom shoes to my exact specifications?? I could have like 5 inch flat platform boots with fur andclouds #and cat shaped holes in the bottom with LEDs in them with pom pom and charms and etc. etc. etc. Like as gaudy and excessively over #decorated as I want lol.. AND they could have skates in the bottom somehow!! ghjgbhjb #this on top of all the custom wizard costumes and period clothing I would order.. Like i LOVE customizing things. I love everything in my l #life being as particualr as possible and cultivating every experience I have to meticulously meet my own specific criteria as much #as is possible. If I had the money to I would never buy something from a store again. EVERYTHING I owned from furniture to clothing #would be either made by me - or mostly - comissioned from craftsmen. custom tiles for my floors. custom bed. custom table. #even like. custom toilet. custom sinks. etc. etc. ouGGH... but yeah.. anyway... shoes..

[krash-8]

ok so I get the schools football team is great and you can afford to spend thousands of dollars on signs that glow when they play and shit but can you go back to not charging kids for pads. or at least stocking the dispensers that do

#rant in tags sorry lol i hate it here #anyways #I don't generally take change with me when i go to the bathroom mid class #believe it or not #and half the time the dispensers are empty or broken anyway #“but then kids will just take them all” 1) how would anybody casually walk out of the restroom with 50 tampons #2) i think youd live #use that money you're always bragging on for something thats NOT showy sports gear or a fucking ten thousand dollar chandelier #hate rich schools because they have so much money they dont even bother spend it right #dont even get me started on the band #i like band !!! band is cool !!!! however my former high school had a great band #and they didn't BEG THEIR MEMBERS to sponsor THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS EACH FOR #on top of what they already have #AND THEY HAVE A LOT. #tbh ive never met more spoiled kids than the band ones at my school in my life #“we didn't get to have 5 field trips to amusement parks this year. just four. of COURSE im upset; they dont fund band enough” #that kid got jumped on by three art kids and a teacher when that came out 😭😭😭 #they just expect this shit #do they notice what its taking from everyone else #i have a teacher whos worked with this school for like 25 years. which is remarkable as this school isnt very old. or this town #compared to my other schools at least #and every day she goes on about How Much She Hates what theyre doing #but she wont leave because she likes to teach #shes watched the school slowly transfer more and more of its budget to showy extra things #and give less and less to necessities #more money does not help. #not only is there nothing more they can take from some families without driving us out‚ but they'll just keep wasting it. #theyre spoiled fucking rotten and you can't give them anything because itll never go where you want #out of tags but yeah i hate them and something needs to be done about the district #school problems

[torturedpoetemotions]

Every time I consider going to a Supernatural convention I go and look at the ticket prices and realize just how fucking skeezy the Creation events in particular are and say fuck it, nevermind, we have parasocializing at home.

#like #you wanna charge over a thousand dollar for a ticket and then 90% of the 'experiences' aren't even included? #be so fucking fr #like i did all the math #in order to attend without paying for shit i don't want (like the gold panel) and still get to do all the shit i do want #it would be over $1300 #with the VAST majority of that being add-ons that aren't included in the base price of admission #so like #what the fuck do you even do at a creation con that isn't just. paying to spend time with actors

[andthebeanstalk]

"Oh, Jack. You silly boi. You know that help at the top of the stairs is no help at all."

---

Art piece i may delete later about my parents offering money to me and my sisters to pay for either grad school (a thing I don't want and can't do with my disability) or my wedding (also a thing I don't need/want), but not for anything that would actually help me escape poverty and find stable housing and income.

Like, I recognize the privilege of being able to complain that my parents have offered me a bunch of money but in the wrong way.

But also if that money is on top of a flight of stairs that I can't climb (but my sisters can), then I haven't really been offered money, so much as I have watched money I need be placed somewhere I can't reach it. Which tbh feels worse than if it was never mentioned to me in the first place.

I was gonna send this art to them and i wrote this big long message to go with it, but then I decided to wait until my therapy session on Tuesday to talk it thru with her first, since I've literally never regretted doing that.

Besides, both of my parents are lawyers and right now they're providing me and my friends with a lot of free legal advice about this property we're trying to buy together, so I don't want to rock the boat currently.

I just wish I knew if I had access to that money as a poor person in need of stable housing and quality disability care, and I wish my parents weren't world-class hLepers who have a long and triggering history of engaging me in rigorous debate about the kind of help I should be allowed to receive from them as a disabled person.

Nothing like having to provide an argument that would hold up in court every time I'm sick and need help! Love that! Love that I can't even talk about money with them now without having invasive thoughts about it for days to come due to past incidences in which this repeated behavior of theirs literally endangered my life!!

Not like I need that mental capacity for working on the largest and most exciting opportunity of my life that also happens to line up with my hopes and dreams for the future!! It's fine!! What do I even need mental capacity for anyway?????

This wouldn't even be the first time this little Distrust Fund has caused problems for my relationship with my parents. They are very opposed to that money being used to help my disability and it has caused PROBLEMS for us that we have never quite recovered from.

It's just difficult to be reminded that although our relationship has gotten better (mostly thanks to me setting boundaries), that doesn't mean they now actually believe what I need for my disability when I tell them.

They really do love me, and they have only ever acted with the best of intentions . But good intentions cease to matter when the impact is harmful and repeated. And they have proven to be repeatedly incapable of providing non-ableist support for me again and again and again. They've even genuinely tried to learn; and sometimes it really seems like my mom has made progress with her therapist (who is disabled), but who knows when I can so jarringly be reminded of how quickly that toxic ableist thinking can show its ugly face.

It's so clear to me and they don't even know it's there.

It feels like I'm in a horror movie when I try to get them to understand their own ableism, and that is a good good sign that I may want to consider an approach that minimizes my mental damage instead. Even if it means I don't get their stupid, deeply-conditional-and-yet-the-conditions-are-SO-vague-and-they-won't-admit-it money.

#original #diary #ableism #ableism cw #if they actually trusted me they'd just give me the fucking money but WHATEVER #maybe it's cause of all those times i was really reckless and irresponsible with money-- OH WAIT. THAT HAS LITERALLY NEVER FUCKING HAPPENED #I GRADUATED BUSINESS SCHOOL WITH HONORS AND HAVE NEVER HAD ISSUES WITH OVER-SPENDING #maybe they subconsciously think I'm stupid w money bc I'm poor. but i doubt my sisters could just get the whole lump sum either. #I HAVE BEEN LIVING FRUGALLY MY ENTIRE ADULT LIFE YOU BASTARDS #I would say there's a 5% chance they pleasantly surprise me but I have to be careful not to spend too much energy on it #the invasive thoughts around my family's ableism are super aggressive and constant when they start #and so i would rather have no help than that stinky-ass hLep that hurts my brain and heart so bad for days after #hLep #anyway i don't want their help paying for a wedding bc i am housing insecure with no income and so is my wife #and besides that wedding planning is hard and stressful and involves either including or snubbing relatives i don't like #so like if you offer me thousands of dollars i would be like Great! More savings means more safety and security! #i would NOT be like Okay time to spend $2000 on fucking flowers I have SHIT GOING ON #if i have a wedding then the cost will be the cost of pizza for all the guests. #also govt says i can't get married or i lose my disability payments so ryan and I just decided we are married years ago #i need SO much disability care equipment that i don't have and i am unable to hold a standard full time job #but yeah sure maybe I'll go get another DEGREE despite my interests being completely non academic. fuck OFF. #i have been writing or making art about this all evening this is not how I wanted to spend the evening it is past 4am #hopefully this processing and drawing and journaling will allow me to remove this issue from the very forefront of my mind #it's a careful line to walk between processing and obsessing. but good processing helps you stop obsessing #hopefully I can save some of the more painful parts of this for therapy so I can focus on other stuff for the next couple days #listen if interacting with someone in a certain way makes you feel like you're in a horror movie then something needs to change #and sometimes the change is that we need to make literal and emotional distance between us and those people bc they aren't learning #okay okay time for edibles and a shower i fuckin earned it and even if i didn't I can do whatever I fucking want 👌 #and also I deserve nice things by default #and so do you

[scum-belina]

My abusive family have more than enough and I only know that because they're constantly bragging about it, yet they make me feel selfish for even wishing to just have...enough? lmao. Make it make sense.

#I never bring up my situation to them but they always do #it's like they get off on comparing how well off they are compared to me #I'm not the only one in the family who has noticed this #but of i say something they'll just say I'm jealous of them #when I'm really not I don't envy them at all bc they're all miserable assholes even with all the money and education #but it grieves me to hear them talk about spending tens of thousands of dollars monthly on things like it's nothing #i really can't help that #one family member was bought a brand new vehicle by their boss and complained bc it wasn't the exact one they wanted #when they talk it's just like that one parasite meme and I'm thr driver while they're the privileged passenger

[priestofberath]

Why are there two buy orders on Marketplace.tf for a Golden Frying Pan for $5,000. No , more important why is the lowest price anyone's willing to sell one for $6,000. Someone is literally willing to drop 5k real money for a fake videogame frying pan and you're not giving it up unless you get an extra thousand? That's five months rent. That's the down payment on a new car. For a digital frying pan

I saw someone on TF2 once, on the Harvest map, they were a Demoknight they had a golden frying pan and everyone was going nuts over it. You're USING the golden frying pan IN-GAME and there are people who would give you 50 fucking Benjamins for it? It doesn't even do extra damage or anything it just looks fancy and makes the chat go crazy. Is it worth it? Is it worth losing out on Fifty Fucking Franklins just to have people in a TF2 casual server say Holy Shit Is That A Golden Frying Pan? Come on.

#what do you do when you offer to buy a team fortress 2 weapon for 5 thousand dollars and somebody accepts that trade #and now you're out 5000 bucks. #but you have a virtual frying pan! what do you do with it then #like you can't just trade it. there are no tf2 trades that could possibly make 5k on a frying pan worth it #how many mann co crate keys is $5k. if one is like $2.30 #about 2174 keys i think for a golden frying pan then #yeah yknow what why not just buy 2k crate keys if youre determined to drop 50 big ones on tf2 #then you could at least make like a mann co crate unboxing video on youtube or something #is this like nfts? am i getting into nfts? i don't want to get into nfts. i want to trade tf2 metal for other things so i can trade for #the archimedes cosmetic. i want to run around as medic and have a bird on my shoulder. a buddy. a comrade #i just don't want to spend actual money on the archimedes cosmetic.

[lookninjas]

It’s not even so much that I specifically want to insult Paul Weller, although he was a dick about Robert Smith but whatever, the insecurity speaks for itself really.

It’s that he looks like what would happen if Iggy Pop grew up in Grosse Pointe, and as someone who grew up surrounded by Grosse Pointers on vacation at their ten bedroom summer “cottages,” I have a lot of really creative insults that only the 80 people in my graduating class would really understand, and I want to hurl them at someone.

And he was a dick about Robert Smith, so.

#this paul weller bullshit #seriously though dude maybe you didn't choose that outfit or whatever #but take off the vineyard vines before you insult someone else's style #out here looking like he's just gotten pulled over in sterling heights for drunk driving and he's about to ask the cop #'don't you know who i am?' #out here looking like he's going to load up the lexus for a trip to the summer cottage #slap down the amex at gurney's and ask when the bridge swings over #the reason there's a starbucks on mackinaw island -- that dude #about to flood lakeshore drive in his quest for more beach on his beachfront property #spent april of 2020 bitching on facebook about how he should be able to spend all his time in his summer home 'cause he pays taxes too #wants to pay over the phone for a kayak and have you hold it at the store 'cause he'll be up in two months #is absolutely going to try to return something with no receipt because he spends thousands of dollars here #is about to ask where the nearest mall is #has never used a bungee cord in his life and it shows #owns the house next to kid rock's parents and their children went to the same private school #unironic fan of betsy devos #voted for tudor dixon because she's hot #that last might be a bit low but eh #okay i'm done for now #i have the picture saved i can show it if anyone's curious

[starlit-mansion]

i hate to say it. but eddy burback and chad chad are both kind of getting on my nerves lately.

#we literally just turned off her new episode because she was so. whiny about having to do commentary. girl you picked the topic???? #and eddy with the constant spending thousands of dollars to have a miserable time like. okay. give me that money then #there's not even like. an arc to it anymore. it's just boo boo it's embarrassing to spend money on stuff i don't even want to do #i'm going to explain how bad the price is to my audience of. broke zillenials? who is this chiding even for?

[colorisbyshe]

i ended up googling how many billionaires there are because of this whole fiasco and there are almost three tHOUSAND billionaires. that is what... trillions of dollars being horded. trillions of dollars that could feed people, house people, educate people. trillions of dollars that could be used to make sanctuaries, protect land and animals, make entire swaths of the world just places where the planet can breathe.

two thousand, seven hundred people. that's just... a particularly dense neighborhood. owning enough wealth to save the world and instead spend on killing it and sometimes killing themselves.

that's what people who go "aw, they're still human beings, aren't they?" don't get. to me, this sounds like fucking space invaders who landed on the planet and just stole the entire food supply. that's not a fellow human being, that is a roadblock to fucking survival. that's my enemy and, yes, i cheer when my enemy dies sometimes.

#like being a billionaire goes past being immoral #you aren't human anymore #and YES i understand the harms of dehumanizing people #but listen #they aren't human #you cant be

[depresseddepot]

every day for the past week I have become inexplicably more and more interested in quilting

#listen im a stupid son of a bitch alright. i cant do math to save my life and complex issues confuse me unless i have 2+ years to process #however: me want make things with hands #also i cannot STAND crocheted things. im really sorry if you like to crochet/love them but i do not agree at all #the yarn (yarn??) used for crocheting is itchy and frizzy and it just fucking sucks. i will die on this hill #knitting is even on thin ice because some of the material is okay and good but all the so called ~high quality~ stuff is like #so stupid frizzy and STUPID. ITS STUPID #WHY DO YOU ALL KNIT WITH THINGS THAT ARE FRIZZY. THE TEXTURE IS AWFUL. WHAT ARE YOU DOING #however: super soft stuff also irritates me so this is probably a me thing #HOWEVER: quilts are not made of frizzy yarn. they are made of sheets of fabric #and the way quilts feel on my skin is such a pleasant sensory experience #the divets from the actual quilting and the heaviness of it and the way the surface gets chilled but not cold #i just LOVE IT OKAY #and i really want to try to make one but i also REALLY don't want to have to purchase a sewing machine #(yes i know there's cheaper ones but i don't want to spend anything over $50 girl and i dont even know how to use a sewing machine) #apparently you can hand sew them which sounds doable for me (im awful at mending but i can sew a straight line probably) #but. that will take AGES #maybe ill really take my time planning a simple quilt thats like. special interest themed??? #that way i dont lose interest a few months in? #idk i just really want to make something that has tangible use and value afterwards #and i cannot afford the thousands of dollars of equipment needed to accurately create wooden furniture so. maybe ill do this #anyway how do you buy fabric /gen. they're all in rolls at the store so do i just like. tell them what size i need and they cut it for me?? #hey google what happens to a quilt if you have really shitty and crooked stitches #anyway. if i reblog 400 quilting posts in a row im so sorry. this is (probably) a phase

[errantryraptor]

i have to not go on tumblr at 6 am after an insomniac episode bc i am always tempted to post the pettiest bitchiest shit !!!!!!!

#squawks #gonna say it in the tags to get it out of my system but not let it break containment #ppl will say shit like 'why are people donating THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS to [insert widely popular website] instead of ME' #gee i wonder why! maybe because they don't know you? maybe because the only time theyre made aware of you is seeing your post #where you're telling them how to spend their money in the most condescending way possible? #but yes tumblr npc 28032842 every rich person who donates to ao3 also follows your blog bc they love your 2 note personal posts #just. there are so many donation posts on this website for the same reason that none of them get any traction. none of us have money. #and i understand why people would choose to donate the 5 dollars they can spare per month to a nonprofit website they use regularly #instead of some stranger on the internet. #but hey. the world revolves around you so it's clearly an act of malice

[zombiefiilm]

Fell in Love

spencer reid x gn!reader

summary: you hadn't expected your friend spencer to be home from his most recent case yet, let alone passed out on your couch

warnings: confessions, kissing, fluff, no use of y/n

word count: 1.5k

The moment the key hit the lock of your front door, you practically felt a weight fall off your shoulders. You had been working all day and there was nothing you wanted more than to change into your pyjamas and watch tv for the rest of the night.

Once inside your apartment, you shut the door, instantly dropping your bag to the floor and your keys onto the table. Your shoes were kicked off and your jacket was strewn across a random chair in a matter of seconds and you were ready to run into your bedroom.

But, as you passed by the living room, you caught a glimpse of someone sleeping on your couch, shoes and coat still on.

Really, you should have been a bit more startled by the sight of someone in your home, considering you lived alone, but you were all too familiar with Spencer's habit of dropping by unannounced.

You stopped in your tracks, walking around to the front of the couch and called his name.

"Spencer" you were met with an annoyed groan as he flipped onto his other side.

"Spencer" you called again, louder, shoving his shoulder slightly. No response.

"Dr. Spencer Reid" you practically yelled right into his ear and you watched him jump this time, turning to face you again.

"I gave you a key for emergencies" you scolded, watching as he sat up and groggily rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"I'm sorry" he sounded overly sincere "I didn't want to go home."

Then you realised that this wasn't just his regular habit of dropping in whenever he was bored, he needed comfort. You knew all to well the toll his job took on him, with everything that’s happened to him you were surprised he was able to hold up as well as he did.

“Oh Spencer” you half-whispered, sitting down on the couch right beside him, shoulder practically pressed against his. “Do you wanna talk about it?”.

“Not really, I just need to get my mind off everything” he sat up a bit straighter, facing you now.

You nodded in response.

“Is that new?” his gaze was suddenly fixated on your wrist as he reached down to your new watch.

“It is” you told him, lifting up your arm to show off the item adorned with a silver band.

“Did you get it in a pawn shop?” he seemed to be doing a pretty good job at distracting himself now, taking interest in random things like he always did.

“How did you know?” you laughed slightly, bringing your arm back down to your side.

“It’s Cartier” he explained “I know you wouldn’t be able to afford a new one, they range from four thousand to hundreds of thousands of dollars”.

“Wow” you feigned offence.

“I didn’t mean it like that, I just know you wouldn’t spend that kind of money, even when you treat yourself” he almost panickingly explained himself but you still felt a little proud at him knowing things about you. You hated spending a lot of money on yourself and you wanted to treat yourself, hence the new item in your collection.

“Did you know that Cartier was the first healer to use platinum in jewellery making? And they popularised the wristwatch in 1904, it’s really quite interesting”

“I didn’t, Reid” you joked. “Do you want some food? I got groceries yesterday so I could make you anything you want”.

“I’m okay” he sighed slightly “I’m just tired”

“You can sleep in my bed, no reason you should be hurting your back on the couch"

"No its okay, I don't want to put you out. I'm fine out here, really."

"I'm not going planning on going to bed for a while, at least go in there and get some rest, okay?"

He simply nodded his head and got up to go to your bedroom, calling out a goodnight as he approached the door.

You spent a few hours lounging about, mindlessly watching Friends reruns to procrastinate anything that actually needed to be done. Eventually though, the tiredness caught up to you and you decided to camp out on the couch for the night.

You cracked open your bedroom door and the small amount of light that flooded in from the hall presented Spencer completely out of it in your bed, his white shirt half unbuttoned and his trousers twisted around him while the rest of his clothes were piled on the floor beside him.

You smiled to yourself as you went to grab a spare pillow and blanket from your wardrobe, preparing to set yourself up on the couch for the night.

As you went to leave the room once again, you heard him sleepily call your name.

"Yeah?" you turned around to him again, seeing him adjust himself slightly.

“Do you want the your bed back?” He began to sit up, the rustling sound of the duvet filling the air.

“You can stay there, don’t worry about it” there was a silence then, you could tell he was about to say something, but he was struggling to get it to slip past his lips.

"Could you stay with me, please" he looked away bashfully "just for a bit”. You couldn’t see his face, but you knew he was giving you a puppy-dog look, eyes wide and lip practically quivering.

“Of course” you dumped everything that was in your hands onto the end of the bed and crawled up beside Spencer.

Without another word, you pressed yourself up right against him, grabbing his hand with yours and smoothing your thumb over the back of his hand. Just the few moments of silence with you sitting there had done Spencer some good, he had already felt himself calming down, and some of his recent anxieties melting away.

The quiet didn’t last long though before Spencer was saying your name again. “Can I tell you something?”

You turned your head to look at him, your eyes finally adjusting to the dark so you could see all of his emotions bleeding through his expressions. You nodded your head, humming slightly to urge him on.

“I really appreciate you, a lot” he hesitated slightly, searching for the words to use next.

“I appreciate you too Spence” you requited.

“No, I’m thankful for everything you do. You have always been there when I need you, you always know exactly what to say to me, you care about me. And I truly hope you can say the same about me”

“Of course I can”

“I need you in my life more than you could ever know” he continued “you’re the most important person to me in the whole world, I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

You looked at him, almost flabbergasted, not knowing what to say that would truly encapsulate how much you cared about him, how happy you were that he appreciated you.

“I like you” he paused “I love you, so much” his words were powerful, they rung in the air as they travelled towards your ears.

“Love?” you repeated, questioning his use of the word. You were no stranger to platonic love but his previous confessions had you questioning the intention of his last sentence.

“I love you, I want to be able to call you mine. I want to come home to you every day, to spend every minute I can with you, to have a future where you’re the centre of all my plans.”

You were practically stumped, the emotions you were feeling rendering your mouth useless.

“If you don’t feel the same way-“ he suddenly became incredibly panicked, spitting out as many words as he could to explain himself before you could cut him off.

“Spencer” you took a deep breathe “I love you too” it was a much shorter confession than his, but you didn’t need to say anything more to him, the confirmation was all he needed.

In the time it took you to blink, your faces were centimetres apart. And then his lips were on yours.

Your body felt like it lit up on that moment, the feeling of his lips on yours waking the butterflies in your stomach. You wasted no time tangling your fingers into his hair and lightly tugging at the roots as his hands slid around your waist, softly massaging your flesh.

It was gentle, his tongue softly slipping into your mouth as you let him do what he wanted, let him take the control.

The kiss was short though, as sleep had began to take over both of you. You mutually pulled away, silently agreeing to lie down, cuddling into one another.

With one more peck on the lips, you rested your head on his chest and closed your eyes.

There was plenty of time to talk it out, to figure out everything between each other, but for now all you needed was the feeling of one another pressed together and the feeling of mutual admiration.

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x gn!reader #dr spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid x reader fluff #spencerreid #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fic #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fic

[suiana]

give me the camboy NOW

no

✎ yandere! camboy . . .

✎ yandere! camboy who's secretly your creepy coworker that just wants to love you. you don't know that of course! which is why... you spend all your money on him, or rather, his alter ego.

✎ yandere! camboy who's a famous streamer on the site he does his streams on. so many viewers, yet he only has eyes for one particular viewer. you.

✎ yandere! camboy who instantly knows that it's you. i mean, who else will have such an embarrassing username? like, ilovemanboobs? seriously? but it's whatever. it just means that he has another weakness of yours up his sleeve that he can use to his advantage.

✎ yandere! camboy who will take his time in easing you into loving him. he doesn't worry about you not loving him. after all, you already love one side of him. he's sure that as long as he plays his cards rught, you'll fall for all of him in no time. and he'll make it happen.

"yeah my day was pretty boring. didn't really do much."

the camboy complains, yawning as he unbuttons his shirt. yeah, today really was boring. it was just a boring day at work, nothing interesting and he didn't even get to see you! the light of his life!

oh whatever, at least he knows that you'll join his stream. you're a little simp for his online persona after all.

that's right, he had an online persona and you were down astronomically bad for it. you even spent thousands of dollars on him! and you were practically going broke because of it!

but oh, how it strokes his ego, knowing that you appreciate at least one part of him, even if you were unaware that it was him, your creepy coworker.

"oh, my ideal type?"

he asks, reading the chat as his toned abs and voluptuous man tits were out on display for all to see. really, he only wishes that you could see his body, but if he were to offer in real life you'd never agree.

the famous streamer hums, thinking for a second before answering in a soft tone.

"i like people that spend money on me."

yep, that was a safe bet. he couldn't risk exposing himself after all. and... it'll be sure to get your attention.

ah, there it comes.

your donations.

*ding! ding! ding!*

the influx of donations from a particular user (you) cause his laptop to chime endlessly. if it were anyone but you, he'd be annoyed. but this was you.

so he graciously accepts every donation, reading every message you send him as he slowly traces the hem of his boxer shorts. hm, maybe he should give you a gift? you're such a cute little simp after all...

"yeah, i guess you are my ideal type, userILOVEMANBOOBS~"

he answers with a chuckle, making eye contact with the camera through his mask. god you were so adorable. if only you knew the guy you were going crazy over was the coworker which you absolutely despised in real life.

"yes yes... I'll give you a little show, my dear. you spent so much money on me after all! it's only gentlemanly for me to do so."

he muses, stripping his boxers down as the chat goes wild. but his attention wasn't focused on them. no, not at all. for you were the only one he saw. you were the only one in his eyes.

and he just wishes you loved him back in real life as well.

but oh well. there's always been enough time for the both of you. enough time to teach you how to love him. enough time for you to accept him in his entirety.

there's always been enough time to get you to love him back.

and it will happen. there's nothing you can do to stop it.

#suiana's sinners #yandere #tw yandere #yandere x reader #yandere imagines #yandere drabbles #yandere scenarios #yandere camboy #yandere camboy x reader #suiana rambling #suiana brainrotting

[way2pretty4this]

Romanticizing Your Life (in a way that won't drain your bank account)

Make a happy playlist and listen to it while going on a walk

start a journal (doesn't have to be consistent, just when you have something to say)

Try baking something (I suck at baking, so if you've ever broken a stove or an oven, this idea is NOT for you)

Try drinking water. In a real glass. You're going to feel so fancy.

Light some candles and buy some flowers for yourself.

Put on a face mask (This never fails to make me feel like the main character)

Watch the sunrise or sunset (If you live far away from a place where you can see it then drive.)

Read a book

Take the newspaper and find the crossword section. Take this to a coffee shop and do it there with your favorite drink (I've been doing this once week and it is genuinely the best part of my day)

Try smiling more. Not in a weird way, but people will react kindly to you if you show them kindness. Its gonna make you feel warm and fuzzy inside.

Paint your nails a color you like (as someone who never has her nails painted, this makes me feel so bougie)

Listen to a podcast. Doesn't have to be a serious one. Either way you'll feel so mature.

TAKE A BUBBLE BATH. I don't do this very often but oh my gosh. I wish I did. It's so relaxing. You could even up it by playing relaxing music from your phone and pretending you're in a spa.

Make your space yours. I mean your room should look like a physical representation of your personality. If this means there are paint splatters on the walls and rubber ducks hanging from the ceiling thats okay. If it means the whole room is painted black and there are 3 pieces of furniture, this is okay. As long as you love it and it makes you feel comfortable.

Give yourself a signature scent. This isn't hard, you don't need to spend thousands of dollars on perfume. Just find a scent you really like, go to the drug store, and buy conditioner, shampoo, body wash, and lotion all with this scent. After you shower, use the lotion all over. This will make you smell like your scent and it's amazing. I started doing this a few months ago and I've gotten so many compliments on how I smell. You don't realize how big a compliment that is until you get it. Trust me.

Of course this is all for fun and you don't have to do any of it if you don't want to, but I think its a cute way to bring a little spark of joy into your daily lifestyle.

♡ Have fun! ♡

#stay focused #self love #self healing #self help #positivevibes #discipline #self improvement #self care #mindset #self growth #romanticise your life #romanticize

[max1461]

I spend most of my internet time on YouTube. It's a good website, I like video. But it's gotten demonstrably worse in the past five(?) years. I've posted about this a thousand times because it bothers me so much.

I am not sure exactly what the cause is, maybe changes in the algorithm or maybe better optimization by creators, but YouTubers by and large seems to have shifted from content to "content". Everything on the platform seems to have less substance. It's showier but completely vapid.

Actually it's not quite that, it's more specific. Today, every video has to have a narrative, it has to have suspense and payoff, even if that's completely shoehorned.

A good example of this is Minecraft videos. I don't actually watch a lot of Minecraft videos, but the change is really easy to demonstrate in this genre. The bread and butter of Minecraft YouTube used to be tutorials and let's plays. Tutorials are relatively brief but high information density; the point of a tutorial is to share knowledge with the audience. Let's plays are slower-paced and lower information density, they provide a kind of relaxing background entertainment similar to certain podcasts. The point is to chill out to them. Game Grumps is just about the only big channel still making let's plays of this form (not for Minecraft, just... at all).

Today, both tutorials and let's plays are second fiddle to the ubiquitous challenge video. Challenge videos are brief but low information density. They fundamentally have nothing to say. They have titles like "is it possible to farm 10,000 wheat in Minecraft in a month???", and the creator will attempt the challenge, cut together clips of their exploits in a rapid, high-intensity style, and generally try to craft these clips into a "suspenseful" narrative. They want us to ask "oh no, will he be able to do it????" But the narrative is always cheap and boring because it's so plainly post hoc. These videos provide none of the genuine emergent narrative or casual humor/banter of a good let's play, and none of the information of a tutorial. They're just faux-suspense, faux challenge, all the meat cut out and nothing but the trappings left over. Meaningless.

All of YouTube is like this now. Every video title has to have Big Number. "I dug 10,000 blocks in Minecraft!!!" "I spent 1000 dollars on vending machines in Japan!!!!" "I wore 50lbs leg weights!!!!"

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP. Give me anything. It doesn't have to be art. Give me information, give me entertainment, give me humor. Give me something, anything, other than Big Number. I cannot express to you the degree I don't care about Big Number. I have never been curious about Big Number. FUCK OFF WITH BIG NUMBER. I don't care about challenges I don't care about Most and Best and Top and Biggest. How about New, Cool, Fun, or Charming? Anything but Most. My god, shut the fuck up about Most forever.

I'm a Most hater. Fuck Most for all eternity.